#sundayafternoonthoughts

[punkecodavid]

#sundaymorningthoughts because I noticed how it is mainly Mediterranean nations and nations near the equator that can express their emotions while ones in the North rarely show them. As the immigration tide changes our population (and our cultures), I believe it is crucial to be free to let our emotions out without harassment. (I still believe this is a reason why Xenophobia has increased, people are too "afraid" to show their feelings)... #sundaysermon #mysermon #lovethyneighbor #showyouremotions #allfeelingsmatter #spoiledparents #spoiledlove #humansareemotionalcreatures #weareallgoodenough #weareallhumans #sundayafternoonthoughts https://www.instagram.com/p/B0wBaxxA1_X/?igshid=1jly2uaxglh4u

[sksaller]

Heroes are both ideals to strive for and reflections of ourselves. They must be kept in balance. Too much of an ideal and you have a ridiculous Mary Sue. Too much of a reflection and you have simply normal life. 

[karmaulade]

What does it feel like? A large dark looming figure That creeps up on you at any moment. There is no escape. It is a giant weight that rests upon your chest And crushes your will. Your heart races out of your chest And sometimes you don’t even know why, until it hits you. It’s here. There are times it stays only for a little while Allowing you to take a breath and keep going. Other times it grabs you from behind, binds your hands, tightens around your throat, covers your mouth, and makes you watch as everyone passes by. Knowing its there Makes it even worse at times. You fret even more Because you know what it does And are too worried to even fight back. Sometimes it’s good to acknowledge it To even let it consume you, you have to work with your shadow. It just takes time, time I feel like I don’t have. This is what anxiety feels like.

A message from someone trying to fight back

[theunwindingroad-blog]

Confessions of a lazy reader

What you read says a lot about you.

No, it doesn’t simply hint at your level of smartness or intelligence. 

It speaks volumes about who you really are.

You may have a schedule where every waking minute of your life is accounted for; or one where you can while away hours smoking silently in the abandoned balcony. 

What gives a peek into your world is how you manage to read.

Reading is a sign of who you really are.

A good reader will read no matter what. 

I, for that matter, am an extremely lazy reader. I can read for days on end; and then suddenly not enjoy a page for weeks.

I can feel absolutely passionate about a book. And then suddenly forget where I placed it last.

My relationship with my books has a cyclonic feel.

At the start of every book, I go through tumultuous effort. The steady reading phase starts only after the first 50 odd pages and by the time I am engrossed into the narrative, the calm at the core of a cyclone engulfs me. And as I complete my journey with the characters, or the pages or the writer, it feels like being dropped from mid-air with absolutely no sense of belongingness.

It is like saying goodbye to someone you think you can still go a long way with. Of course, this is only when I like a book. When I don’t like a book, I jump onto another book I am sure will leave me wanting more.

Else, I ruminate and wander in the hope that the book (I just completed and liked) will find me again until another one gallops my sense of time and being.

[mmariae-blog]

"Put it down on me"

I hate when parents start to talk about death when they're stressing.. it's like this all the time but lately it's been too much. I see their point and I just don't say anything anymore. They say what they need to say, but sometimes the things they say hurt. Sometimes they don't see all the small things done. But nope. Paying bills and cooking all meals are what they expect. And at the end of it all, they say start a family and see how you'll live. I do the best I can to give and help out. But sometimes I feel the need to give up. Their expectations are just... like where do they get these perfect little images from? It sucks when all you can do is just be quiet.

[qrctrini]

500 days of relationship dependency syndrome

So recently just before I left the office I was drawn into a fb messenger conversation with this chick who, in response to my customary inquiry about how she's doing, told me that she wants to "get a bf and settle down...been single for too long and change is needed. " After a bit of chit chat I eventually responded directly to her previous statement by saying " I don't like to have another person as the centre of a life goal because you have no real control over that." I had to leave work so the conversation was cut short but there was more to what I wanted to say to her than what I offered as a response. These days, from my interactions with people, her train of thought doesn't seem to be such a big outlier. I guess it's understandable to desire a significant other. Many single people do. But I find it unhealthy to harbour that desire to the point where you view your life as incomplete because you don't have a partner at your side. Just as I was mulling over that thought I came across the post below from one of my tumblr follower. Gordon-Levitt, using the character he plays in '500 days of summer' , elaborates on the mindset I'm referring to.

            “The (500) Days of Summer attitude of “He wants you so bad” seems attractive to some women and men, especially younger ones, but I would encourage anyone who has a crush on my character to watch it again and examine how selfish he is. He develops a mildly delusional obsession over a girl onto whom he projects all these fantasies. He thinks she’ll give his life meaning because he doesn’t care about much else going on in his life. A lot of boys and girls think their lives will have meaning if they find a partner who wants nothing else in life but them. That’s not healthy. That’s falling in love with the idea of a person, not the actual person.”

Joseph Gordon-Levitt in an interview with Playboy Magazine

People who have this mindset often don't take the time to really know the person that they claim to be so madly in love with. In fact, beyond a couple superficial requirements, oftentimes the actual person they're attracted to is inconsequential. They're in love with the concept of being in love. The inevitable disappointment that arrives at the couple's doorstep when the I'm madly in love and can't live without you bubble finally bursts inexorably leads to hurt on both sides. The person exhibiting the essentially hyper-needy behaviour can't escape this hurt as their genuine feeling of not being able to live without their partner in actuality is an inner void caused by a poor self concept - a void that they expected their partner to fill but which, as the term implies, can only be really satisfied by the self.

Truth is though, the ever evolving process of working on ourselves should be something we all do. Knowing who you truly are and having a deep understanding of your  likes, dislikes, passions, and  what makes you tick serves to give your life a sense of direction and meaning. Without this sense of self, a sense of your self worthiness and discovery of your esteemed self,  it's near impossible to lead a fulfilling life and, additionally, the temptation may become rife for some to recruit others to do the task of validating them - a task that we must necessarily complete on our own.

[punkecodavid]

To the white feminists who go out of their way to fight for reproductive and sexual freedom but are not interested in any racial theories, THANK YOU. To the intersectional feminists who fight for racial equality yet are unaware of their ableism, THANK YOU. To the White Supremacists/Black Supremacists/Any other Nationalists who are deeply aware of any issues that a lot of us ignore yet cause harm (which is unnecessary), THANK YOU. This type of "controversial" uplifting is needed even if people disagree with me and others... #nonjudgementallove #unconditionallove #compassionforall #sympathy #empathy #abundance #goingagainstthegrain #sundaymorningthoughts #sundayafternoonthoughts #humanityiscomplex #lovethyneighbor #spiritual #religious #spiritualawakening https://www.instagram.com/p/ByNzknyF1Gd/?igshid=1vejr4lbpitdn

[punkecodavid]

This is what I tend to say all along, it was not the "college-educated white women" voting for republicans but the low turnout of Latino and other voters. I am sure all of the rage after the election had to do with over glorification of Obama and the unwillingness to see the problems of rural voters. This is why I believe that unity is important but hard for a lot of people since we have to take into account everyone's issues, even our "enemy's issues."... #sundaymorningthoughts #sundayafternoonthoughts #lovethyneighbor #sympathy #empathy #defamation #libellaws #newkindofrevolution #ourrevolution #economicinequality #latinx #latino #hispanic #uspolitics #politicsisamess #activism #nosuchthingasaslacktivist #sabbaththoughts #philosophy #philosophie #innerfrench #conversationstarter https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpfayn_nG2d/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1lut604wubmu8

[karmaulade]

It won’t ever be the same Our smiles and wide eyes Have withered and some have cried It won’t ever be the same No more hellos or goodbyes Only quick glances and sighs It won’t ever be the same We have been reduced to formalities Only talking when it’s convenient It won’t ever be the same No words come to my mouth when your here Can’t help feeling cold,shut off when your near It won’t ever be the same Tried so hard to harden this heart You make it hard for me to want to stay a far It won’t ever be the same Those hands wrapped around my back Have turned into hands ripping at my cracks It won’t ever be the same We have fallen out And I know we won’t ever get back It won’t ever be the same I cannot look at you and forget what we did Innocent but filthy I shouldn’t have let you in We won’t ever be the same It didn’t take long last time For us to fall back to our normal relationship laughing and joking But this time we won’t ever be the same So I’ve learned I don’t want to be the same Who needs to base their self worth off of the attention of another I am a goddess not waiting to be discovered I won’t ever be the same because I choose to change, to grow I won’t ever be the same because I will know what to truly love I won’t ever be the same because I will have filled that empty void with friendship With passion With knowledge With self love I won’t ever be the same Because I will finally love myself There is no need to inflict a thousand wounds When there are so many eager to do so So no, it won’t ever be the same because I have realized I only need to love me and from there other can choose to recognize Or move out of my way It will be a long and hard road, But I am moving through this pain So I know I can wait a bit longer It, we, I won’t ever be the same and that is ok When I reach my true form then I will decide if I want our relationship it go back to normal We could still laugh and joke but it is a two way street And I don’t think it’s time for us to be The same.

[karmaulade]

When I think of you I light up like a kid in a candy store You never cease to amaze me You’re every type of wonderful So many shades of you but mostly only shades of blue That’s ok though cause I like blue I’d love you no matter what day Be it Sunday or Monday You have been tugged in every direction but up I try to catch you but it’s not enough They just don’t understand your worth They step on you like dirt No one wants to talk about the hard stuff They want you to giggle stupidly smile till it hurts No, they don’t want to deal with your pain Or the truth in your words They want the happy girl Well they just can’t see that you're enough for me They want to put you down and leave you out, ignore you, throw you on your back Well no I wont let them If they cannot recognize That you are an angel in disguise Well then so be it, they missed out And I lucked out I can have you all to myself right Well, not entirely See I get it you will always be free You have other friends that can make you happy too As long as you don’t forget the one kid who will always love you You are hot like red hots, And sour like them kids You are sweeter than cocoa kisses They see you as too much all wrapped in one, to me you are a mixture of all the finest tastes And still growing I think back to the day I saw you, you were beaming and glowing so ready for this new store You came with other friends They came and went, then came back again Same with us new kids some stayed and some ran right back out that door I had my moments, but this isn’t about me Your glow was quickly dimmed and your colors darkened You were consumed by a whole other type of blue I just wasn’t used too I got angry I will admit, that you changed a little bit But I’ve never minded blue and your change helped me change too By that third year knowing you I finally realized all you could be When I think of you I think of those hard times, I remember why it was I stayed Because no one ever knew me the way that you did Your sour and bitter never was too much bite for me You never made me feel less than You have always lifted me up And even though you don’t realize how sacred you are Just know you are always enough, not even just for me You’re a goddess, one I admire, never let them take your fire Burn hotter than the sun and let them weep for they are none Your blue may never go away but I am here for you each and everyday I am writing this for a friend, someone I see as my soulmate We have shed many tears of joy and of sadness You tell it like it is and thank goodness to my face You are my goals and my aspiration You are the candy I choose every day Not many know how close we are but today I shout it from the mountain tops You are my one my only So-phie

A friend

[karmaulade]

It’s time for me to move on. Right? I mean you would never be able to be what I needed. I should forget you and push these feelings out. Right? I mean you would never feel the same. I can do better, I should focus on myself. Right? I mean I gotta love me before anyone else. I need to love every little part of me. Right? I mean what’s not to love, I’m ethereal. It’s just so hard sometimes forgetting what was and loving something so familiar but so raw. Right? I mean we should cut ties with the toxic things in our lives and appreciate what we are. Except maybe I’m not ready to let you go. I keep replaying situations of us going on a date or you holding me once more. I can feel you so close to me but you’re so far. I want to move on though and love me, but you are distracting me from that. I want to love myself but I can’t help loving you. So I’ll keep waiting until I can’t wait anymore and asking myself: why don’t you love me?

When you love the wrong person

[karmaulade]

When did the passionate moments turn into “you’re nice"  When did smiles turn to sour looks of shame and regret. Was I not enough, was I only useful for that short month of meaningful but meaningless love making.  You stopped feeling it, but your words, your lips, your touch lingered on me for so much longer than you’d have wanted and I would not stop feeling it. My skin crawled craving you again but you had pushed me away without doing anything, because I saw more in that empty hole of what we had than you ever did.  I was hot and nice, why couldn’t I be beautiful and interesting. Someone you wanted to get to know more than a quick hook up in a corner at a party could allow you too. When did my feelings start to become invalid and when did you move on? You tore at my brain 24/7 taking pieces of me with you.  I thought I was strong, better than this, the most whole out of those I know. You changed me and made me question more than I should have. So on that night when you happened to be out of town, I let go, I drank until I was finally warm all around and until you left a sour taste in my mouth. I don’t regret what happened next with someone so familiar to you and me, but, it made me do some thinking. What I came up with was: 1) You were a waste of time for the amount of pain you unconsciously inflicted on me. Maybe you didn’t mean that much to me. Maybe it was attention and wanting that I was searching for. I loved the touch and feel of what we did, but maybe I was in love with the feeling and not you. It made me feel important and well, needed.   Or 2) I needed that night to truly think about my feelings for you. You probably do not care that I hooked up with someone else, but I realized maybe I do want you and love you. Everything feels so much clearer after a moment of anger. Some people regret their decisions, those drunk I love/hate you texts or calls, those stupid one night stands, the tears. Not me. It put everything into perspective. Except now I’m stuck in limbo wondering if I love you or if I loved the idea of us. At least my feelings are not fully consumed by the idea of you because I know I can find it in anyone else if push comes to shove. So thanks for teaching me that I don’t need you to feel loved…. but I voluntarily want to love you.

Someone who shouldn’t have let you get to them but doesn’t necessarily regret what we had.