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aliceinborderlandsquidgame · 30 days ago

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We meet again | In-ho x Fem!Reader | PT3

Summary: It was only one night for fun, you never thought you would see him again. Even less in a place like this one.

P1 P2 PT4 END

Warnings: S2 Spoilers - Canon violence - Pregnant!Reader - Non canon background for In-ho - Use of (Y/N) - Angst - Protective!In-ho - Soft!Dae-ho - Panic!Reader - grammar mistakes -

Morning came once again, this time you managed to get some good sleep, between the extra blankets and Jun-hee body heat (who told you she may end hugging you since she liked to cuddle in her sleep), you did not mind and so you woke up with her snoring over you.

"How does you two feel?" Dae-ho asked from besides the bed, for him it was like seeing his sisters from back home.

"I think we are both fine, better than last night" You slowly moved Jun-hee who asked for five more minutes, not catching up were she was.

You let out a small smile and looked around, Gi-hun and Jung-Bae seemed to be engrossed in a deep conversation, there was no trace of In-ho.

"Hey Dae-ho" He made a noise to let you know he was listening "Where is In-ho?"

"Oh, he said he needed to use the restroom and asked me to keep watch over you two" He responded like it was a normal thing. "He is really protective you know? I think he sees Jun-hee like a little sister of sorts but..." He closed his mouth not wanting to make things akward.

"But?, you can tell me"

"Its different with you. I see the way he looks at you, he was very atentive when we were walking the stairs and even let you held on him"

Well, he kind of forced me to.

"And, well the first night...I saw him giving you his blanket, I dont think he sees you like a sister at all" He added a small blush on his cheecks as he felt like he was sharing a secret

You did also blush, his words hitting your heart hard and deep. Did he really care ? Did he really care for his baby ? And yourself ? Was it true that he would have stayed or went back ?

"I think you are overthinking, he most likely does it because im...fragile right now"

But Dae-ho moved his head "No, im positive that he sees you more than a friend, trust me, I grow up with four sisters, im used to see which men would see them as friends and which would see them as lovers"

"Does that mean you see me like a sister?" You asked him trying to make him forget about his ideas.

He suttered responding "W-well, I mean, you are a woman" You nodded and he laughted "Right you are, and you are pregnant no less...two of my sisters were pregnant once and I was besides them during it so...m-maybe im acting on instinct. Sorry if it brothers you"

"No, no it does not. If nothing im happy. My brother left the country when he fell on debt, and passed it to me. He never called me or contacted before it. So...if you see me as your sister then its fair I see you as my brother"

Dae-ho smiled softly at your words He was going to talk once again but the voice of Jung-Bae calling him made him stop.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"Its time for the game yet?" Jun-hee said getting up blinking to adjust to the light.

"No yet, we have a few more minutes to rest" You responded "How do you feel?"

Jun-hee dismissed your worried tone with her hand "Im fine, slept better than last night. Thank you for sharing the blankets"

"You are welcome, we must take care of each other, right?"

She smiled, a sincere one. "We have"

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

In-ho with his clothes of Front Man read over the food for the next days, besides him stood The Officer not saying a word knowing better.

"Add one appel for each player" He finally said, giving the officer the tablet back who nodded. "And kept the vitamins for player 222 and 344"

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"Attention players, today we will be giving food, form a line and wait" The Guard called.

Jun-hee and you moved to get in line, followed by Jung-Bae, Gi-hun and Dae-ho. "Why are they giving us breakfast? And where is In-ho?" Jung-Bae asked looking around with confusion, even Gi-hun had started to get worried.

"Well...he did say he needed the restroom, but he has been gone for much time now" Dae-ho said looking around too.

"Maybe he got lost?" Jung-Bae said getting a look from the four of you. "Well dont look at me like that!"

"You four went to the restroom last night, how far is it?" You asked a bit worried

"Not far, and the guards keep watch" Gi-hun responded

"Maybe he tried to escape?" The voice of Jun-hee asked

All of you fell in silence, the words of the other players muffled by your own thoughts.

Slowly the line went on, the four of you moving in a robotic way, like already mouring his death.

It cant be, I cant lose him again..

You almost fell but Dae-ho noticed it and took you in his arms

"Hey...he may he alright..."

You wanted to cry, maybe the pregnancy was getting on you, maybe the stress was too much.

"And what if not? What if..."

"Next"

Dae-ho helped till you two were in front of the guard who this time gave milk, bread, an appel and the same plastic bag as last time"

Dae-ho looked with curious eyes but a loud sound from the guard and and an almost violent push of food made him look away.

You took a seat and forced yourself to eat and take down the pills. You knew you needed them for your baby.

Dae-ho followed by the others came too, once again Jung-Bae offered Jun-hee and you his milk.

All of you ate in silence, no one knew what to say or do, everyone was confused because of the suprise breakfast but also worried over their other teammate.

"What's going on, the food cant be that bad" The voice from In-ho broke off the dead silence.

"In-ho!" All of you exclaimed, it was a fun scene for the outside of it.

In-ho took a look at all of you, he could tell all of you were worried over him. His gaze lingered on you for a longer moment but he broke the eye contact and took a seat.

"Where were you?" Gi-hun asked between worried and suspicious

In-ho kept his eyes, "I had a small injury from last game, needed to check it" He lied "Tried to go during the night but the guards did not let me"

The silence was still tense but you decided to break it.

"Im glad you are fine" You went to munch back the appel blushing a bit under his eyes. He smiled at you and passed his appel to you, "Jun-hee and you can share it, I dont need it"

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

"Attention players, the next game will start soon, form a line and follow a guard"

All of you moved, In-ho once again being in front of you while Dae-ho was behind.

"Really, I can climb these just fine" You told them but they just ignored you.

However this time the guard lead the line of players where you were around a different path one with almost no stairs and the ones that did appear where short ones.

You did not want to show it, but you were grateful for this. Not questioning why the path had change.

Jun-hee was as content as you, holding her own belly, even if she was not as pregnant as you, she still got tired from time to time. She looked at you smiling a bit when he saw In-ho looking over his shoulder to check on you.

Oh, she was sure you two had something. Maybe he was indeed the father of your baby. Maybe it was fate that you two met in here. Much like her own....even if she did not want anything to do with the father of her own baby.

If by the next game all of you were out then she would like to stay close to you. Maybe you two could go and look for cheap clothes for your babys, pick a color for their rooms. If you were living alone maybe you two could live together, or she could live close to you if by any chance In-ho and you shared a place.

She would love to go and have dinner, the three of you. She could picture In-ho not letting you or her do a thing, he would most likely cock and clean.

Maybe Dae-ho could come too. He did said he grow up with four sisters, maybe he would give you two some tricks and help you two. He could introduce his sisters to the two of you.

Her dream ended when they arrived to the next game.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

In-ho was nervous. He knew he could not change the game itself, it would make these watching it get too invested and suspect, last thing he wanted was for the "VIPs" to get their attention on you.

Still, this game was dangerous. Specially for you, it did include running and the spinning, he swear to himself to stay besides you during all of it. But even with that...what if the stress was too much ? The music ?

Fuck, fuck all of this. Fuck it being The Front Man, fuck the dam games, fuck Gi-hun for causing trouble. Why could him just take the money and live his life?

Maybe it was wrong to blame Gi-hun for this. After all, it was not his fault that he had let you pregnant....

But it was his fault he had to make things harder, use all his energy for the games, for these on top of him to be satisfied, if he had not cause trouble outside....

"In-ho" Your sweet voice made him get back "What do you think? About the next game?"

Were all of you talking ? He never noticed.

"Mhm, could be migle" He trailed off

"Like, when we used to count run and hug each other?" Jung-Bae asked

"Must have something to do with these doors" Gi-hun pointed out "Make teams and go inside, something like that"

You little fucker....

"These are too far away..." You said starting to get nervous

"We wont leave you behind" In-ho told you giving your hand a quick grip

I wont leave you behind.

The guards had been ordered to not shoot you. Only to take you to his room in case you did lose. But In-ho would not let you go, he did not want to be separated from you.

"Yeah, we are a team" Dae-ho said taking your hand and Jun-hee who was also scared. "We wont let you two behind"

Maybe the four men from your team had different reasons to be in the games, but they had one objective this time.

Protect you and Jun-hee at all costs.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○

"Attention players, the next game is Migle, please get on the platform, when the song stops a number will be say. You must form teams of that number and go inside one of the rooms. If you fail to do so, you will be eliminated"

"You were right" You said to In-ho who helped you get on the platform "And Gi-hun, you were also right about the doors, you two seems to share the same brain"

Gi-hun said nothing while In-ho gave your hand a small grip. The platform started to spin, he could see you already feeling dizzy.

"Try to focus on a specific spot" He said avobe the music "That way you wont faint"

You did as he told you, eyes focus on a specific spot, the song was the old one you would hear kids sing back in your town. It made you want to vomit, to think on how twisted this was.

"10"

All of you started to look around, you were already six, just needed four more, but no one seemed to be around even if there were lots of players.

"Fuck what do we do" Jung-Bae said looking around

"How many are you?" Player 120 asked, behind her player 095, 007 and 149 stood.

"Six" Gi-hun responded quickly scanning the group seeing they were four, the number they needed

"Alright lets go then" In-ho said taking your hand between his, Dae-ho took Jun-hee hand with his, player 007 seemed to be dragging player 149, they were mother and son after all.

"There!" Gi-hun said running ahead opening a purpel door and making sure all of you went inside before he did it.

All of you were breathing hard after the run and stress.

Suddendly the door lock and the voice said time was up, next thing that came were the sounds of gunshots and screams.

"Oh you poor girls" The older woman said looking at Jun-hee and You like a mother would look at her daughter.

"We are fine" Jun-hee said hand on her belly as she took a quick look at you who nodded with a small smile.

"We are holding up" You told the older woman who was now cursing whoever would let two pregnant woman enter such a dangerous game.

In-ho had his face void from any emotion, even his eyes were stone cold while he listened to player 149 rant. It was destroying his heart.

The door unlocked again and the ten of you went out. Not knowing which number could be said next the ten of you decided to be close once the platform started to spin again.

"4"

Fuck, two will be out. You thought and all seemed to think the same, each one looking at the rest.

"Dae-ho, In-ho you two go with (Y/N) and Jun-hee, you four go together" Gi-hun started to make teams

"W-wait, what about-" Jung-Bae nervously asked but Gi-hun talked again "We will find two more, now go"

All of you splitted out, you were able to see the other four go inside a room before Dae-ho found one.

The four of you stood there, you went to look outside since the door had a small space, but between the lights and chaos you could not see Gi-hun or Jung-Bae.

"Hey, Seong was here before, and Jung-Bae its his best friend" Jun-hee said pulling you away from the door "I think they will be fine"

The door lock once again and the same sounds from last time repeated.

You closed your eyes feeling the breakfast trying to go up and out but you forced yourself not to.

Time passed slowly till the door unlock, the four of you inmediatly started to scream for Gi-hun and Jung-Bae but they did no appear.

"I dont see them" You said starting to panic "I- are they dead? I cant remember their numbers...did they said their numbers?" You asked getting more and more nervous not seeing around a player hitted your side

"Watch it caw" player 009, the same from the last game said.

"That little-" Dae-ho was about to go towards him but the screams from Gi-hun and Jung-Bae stopped him.

"Guys!" You said going towards them and hugging them, you felt Gi-hun tense under the hug, maybe he was not used to being hugged. "I was worried over you two" You separated yourself from them

"Gi-hun managed to find two more, its all thanks to him" Jung-Bae said but Gi-hun said nothing still lost in some thoguths

"Im glad you are safe" He finally said. He felt specially protective over you and Jun-hee, but since you seemed to be almost about to cry he could not help but let you know how he felt.

"We are, thanks for your quick thinking" In-ho appeared besides you, it did appear that he was covering you with his body but you did not say a thing.

The six of you went back to the platform, the other four players decided to stay close in case a high number was said.

The platform started to spin once again, the song was short played

"3"

"Let split" Jung-Bae said, already getting besides Gi-hun, "Jun-hee you can come with us"

"But-" Jun-hee did not want to separate herself from you. Last two rounds were heavy on her, being close to you had helped her calm down. She knew you would be safe with Dae-ho and In-ho, specially with In-ho.

"Go with them, we will see each other again" You softly told her giving her a quick hug and parting ways with Dae-ho and In-ho who was looking for a room. Most were already occupied but he would not let that stop him. He will get you inside one no matter what he had to do.

"There! Green one on the left" You screamed at them and both nodded going towards it.

However the three of you were not the only team that was going towards that door, In-ho noticed them right away and with decision ran faster taking one by the collar and punching him. The other two went to help their fallen companion but In-ho managed to fight them off giving Dae-ho and you enoguh time to get inside the room.

"In-ho, lets go time its almost up!!" You called him from the door not being fully inside yet.

He took a glance at the timer and sprinted towards you, barely making inside when the door closed with a loud sound.

"You fucker!! That was our room" One of the players that In-ho had stopped started to punch and scream.

Dae-ho hugged you pulling yourself as far from the door as he could while In-ho stood at the front, blocking the view.

He knew what was coming next and the player being too close would only make it worse.

"Cover her ears" In-ho told Dae-ho over his shoulder who catched up and did as told

The gunshots happen again, this time louder and closer. The player that had been screaming was dead outside now.

"Its ok, we are ok. (Y/N) how do you feel?" Dae-ho asked worried seeing you trembling. "H-hey whats wrong?"

In-ho moved towards you pulling you against his chest. He felt the tears falling down your face and the sobs.

"Shh, its fine. We made it, you and the baby are fine" In-ho calmed you down his own heart beating fast. If he was not inside the room before the time was up something could had happen. Even if the orders were clear to not hurt you, he had no idea how the guards would have manage the fact that inside the room where only two and not three players.

Would they ignored it? Kill Dae-ho and let you live? Give him more time?

He was taking many risks and was getting more worried over you and his baby. This game was too stressful, what was he going to do?

Once the guards removed the bodies the door did unlock, it was a nice suprise not seeing a pool of blood outside the door of the room you were in.

"Guys! Here" Gi-hun voice called, behind him Jung-Bae and Jun-hee followed

"Hey..." You said in a low and tired tone.

"What happened?" Jun-hee asked taking your hands in hers

"T-here was another team and we-" You could not finish the memory of them coming back.

"Its not your fault" Gi-hun said, knowing that most likely you three had to fight for the room. "Its no ones fault"

"In-ho saved us" Dae-ho said patting his back

In-ho tried not to let a groan, he only gave a small smile.

"Players get on the platform, next round will soon start"

The six of you went once again. In-ho made sure to take your hand in his. You looked at him giving him a significant grip and nodd.

"6"

It was like heaven had hear your prayers, the six of you did not waste time and ran to a nearby door. Not lots of players had exactly six so luckly you all made it without having to fight.

"I think this has been the easiest round" Jung-Bae said letting himself fell against a wall

"We got lucky, other number would have gave us problems" You said also slowly falling to sit

"How many rounds do you think we have to play?" Jun-hee wondered and all of you started to think

"Most likely one, I believe they had eliminated enough players by now" In-ho said feeling a headache forming.

"Then which number?" Dae-ho asked making silence fell over the room.

"It would be too much to ask for six again, right?" Jung-Bae said

"I dont see them being that generous" Were your only words.

Finally, the last round. The platform was once again spinning, song playing, In-ho knew it was the last round and that it was going to be two. He had decided he would go with you, the rest could separate as they wanted. But he would not leave you.

"2"

"Pairs! Form pairs and go" Gi-hun said seeing that most players had already started to move

In-ho took your hand once again not giving you time to think as he took you to the nearest room.

"W-wait, what about-"

"Jun-hee will be fine, and so will the rest" He said opening the door and making you go inside. "Stay at the back in case they try pulling the door open" He ordered and you did as he said.

Not sooner than later players were trying to open the door but In-ho had an iron griop on it, he was using all his force to not let them in.

Cmon, just finish the dam timer

"Times up"

The door locked for the last time and In-ho took a moment to collect his breath back. He turned to see you on the floor, eyes red and tears falling, hands over your belly.

"(Y/N) look at me, you are fine. The baby its fine" He assured you getting closer taking your face between his hands and cleaning your tears.

"I wont let anything happen to either of you" He added with lots of conviction "I will make sure you two are safe till the end, alright? Dont worry about anything just focus on surviving"

"But im scared, what if you die? What if you leave?" You asked criying a bit more.

"I wont, I promise you. Im sorry, sorry for everything. Even if you dont blame me anymore, im so sorry. Nothing like this should have happen. You should not be here"

You did not know. But In-ho was apolozising not only because of that. But because he was the one who came up with the games. Made them so he could break Gi-hun's will. It never ocurred to him that you would end here. Never in a millon years would he have thought the girl who he slept once was pregnant, the girl who plagued his days and nights was going throw a lot alone.

He felt deeply sorry for everything.

"Stop it, you know I dont blame you. If anything...im happy" That made In-ho look at you suprised. "I never thought I would be a mother, I never saw myself as one but, you made it possible. Even if things were not ideal. Im happy, and im happy with you. Im happy I could see you again, im happy that you care for me and the baby"

"You have no idea how much you two mean to me, listen (Y/N) you said it, it was not ideal, and our moment together was short. But never, I have never cared for someone as deep as I care for you"

Maybe only for his brother, but he had shoot him, so you were higher on the list.

"In-ho...."

"Can I kiss you? Please, please I need to kiss you, I need to know this is real" He begged you his walls falling and desesperation coming out.

You nodded and he leaned in keeping his eyes look in yours till his lips were on you.

It was soft, and tender. His movements were slow but passionate pulling all his feelings on it. It felt like the first time you two kissed, the world fading outside, only you two mattered.

In-ho pulled his hand over your belly not yet touching it, but you moved them and for the first time he was able to feel your belly. To think his baby was inside, was too much, too emotional, he did almost cry.

But a kick, a soft one directly where his hand was made him stop. He looked down, not beliving it when he felt it again. His baby was kicking him, his baby was alive.

"I think it knows its father" You said smiling feeling one more kick. Your baby almost never kicked, it was mostly quiet and would move when the sun was too strong but nothing much.

However, with In-ho around it was like it had woke up from a long nap.

"Do you know the gender?" He asked in a state of bliss

"No, I want it to be a suprise"

"Then, how do you call it?"

"Little one"

"Hello Little One, im your father In-ho" at this the baby kicked once again "Stay safe in there, your mother its going amazing so far"

And there, in that small room. In these deadly games, with blood and bodies outside. In there, In-ho found himself being the happiest man alive, with you by his side and his little one.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

Tags:

@maria-trisha @blueyesuguru @imenekiki @victorie767 @futuristicdefendorfart @heyitsmefall

@love-you-louise @fantasylovestoryme @sleepyycatt @nightdark-dreamdark @lindsay000000 @ourlovesarang @smally97 @zigmasstuff @aleemendoza2425-blog @the-disaster-in-waiting @ilovequeen978 @sc4rrc @sylviavf @l4venderia @blueeclipsepaperstudent @annasnape7

I could not tag some, sorry.

#squid game imagines #squid game x y/n #suicide squad imagine #squid game x reader #in ho x reader

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deliasmoothie · 3 months ago

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I don't fucking know how this went from 0 to 100 like that

Sun loves u so much that he's the only one to have the honor to liven't u- Anyways- i love fucked up twisted love sun

#i wanna do one for moon #also fucked up twisted love #cause im a simp #and they are simps of yn too #anyways NIGHTY NIGHT BED TIMEEEEEEE #dca #dca x yn #dca x reader #fnaf #fnaf sun #five nights at freddy's #if ur reading this- as a reward- u can send asks to fucked up twisted love sun and moon #they'll reply fuck yeah #with stupid sketches like this one hell yeah #tw suicide #tw death #tw violence

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tls12lessthan3 · 2 months ago

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the way kim dokja starts off treating telling yoo sangah his story as the cruelest thing he could do to her. takes her for a walk and tells her about his shit childhood and condemns himself all the while as if he's doing some horrible thing to her. and she responds by holding his hand in a quiet comfort, treating his story with the utmost care. the way it parallels and contrasts with kim dokja taking yoo sangah inside his library later on. letting her read every little sordid detail of his life. not out of a desire to hurt her but out of a desire to save her. and her responding the same way she did then.....holding his story gently......treating it with kindness.....because to her knowing his story was never a burden.

#group suicide in 10!!!#orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #yoo sangah #kim dokja

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m-ilkiee · 2 months ago

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Monsters: Mikey Sano x Reader x Izana Kurokawa

Chapter 3: The Lesser of Two Devils

series summary: your grievous sin was Emma standing up for you to her brothers. and now you’re going to pay the heavy price for destroying their perfect family dynamic.

cw: DARK CONTENT, MISOGYNY, NSFW, smut (character x character), dubcon, noncon, DARK IMPULSE MIKEY, depressive thoughts, victim blaming, sucidial ideation, religious guilt & discussion (very brief), gaslighting, power imbalance, manipulation, abuse (domestic, verbal, sexual, finanical), love bombing, violence (physical, mental, sexual), slut shaming, peer pressure, dry humping, attempted rape, nonconsensual filming.

r-18+ (not suitable for 17 and under)

wc: 13.3k

[masterlist] [chapter 2] [chapter 4] [taglist]

a/n: the reason why this chapter didn't come out earlier was because I was sick and busy with school. Anyways comments, reblogs and anonymous asks are welcomed.

“DON’T you want to know what me and (name) talked about?”

Mikey doesn’t look away from the burger he’s eating, but he hears Izana loud and clear. The cool morning breeze hits his skin, his golden hair flying in the wind as the two men sit on the ledge of Toman’s balcony, legs dangling from the porch. On a normal day, Mikey wouldn’t be awake by this time, opting to catch some extra hours of sleep until he is forced to go to class. But with the possibility of you saying something to Emma about the incident at the car and Izana going ahead to fix it, he was too restless to go to bed.

He forgot that you could still tell someone, even with your promise. You had no reason to honor it, especially with how he treated you badly, So to get the voice message from Izana with you saying you will keep quiet, was surprising.

“You already told me she’d shut up about the whole thing.” Mikey murmurs, gulping down the last part of the food. “I don’t care about her beyond that.”

A chuckle escapes Izana’s lips as the tanned man takes out a cigarette pack from his pocket. He picks one out with his teeth, then stretches the pack to Mikey. Mikey shakes his head no, at least not now that he just ate a really nice burger and Izana merely shrugs, pushing it back into his pocket, before taking out his lighter. They sit in silence as the lighter flickers on, and Izana brings it to his lips, before shutting it off.

Mikey stares ahead of the weather as Izana smokes, the sun barely peeking out of the dense clouds surrounding it, meaning it was probably going to be a rainy day. He remembers his teenage years, whenever it was rainy and Shin had to go to work, leaving Izana in charge, the three of them would have rainy days, doing things like building large pillow forts, playing video games or a makeshift band with Izana on the guitar, Emma with her drumset she barely ever used and him on the vocals. He and Izana always got along, they were having too much fun to even think about fighting, and it made Emma happy too.

Eventually, as they grew older, rainy days were spent apart, with Izana either busy with work or smoking in his room and him busy with his own gang, in his own world.

And Emma; they left her all alone. Not like they had a choice, they just couldn’t bring themselves to drag her into the lifestyle they were knee deep in or endanger her by bringing her out with them. In hindsight, they were just trying to protect her, but in a way, Mikey knows she resents them for isolating her.

You were her act of defiance against their strict rules. She could hide it with her words that she was fine with her upbringing, but her actions speak even louder for herself. Mikey just wished she defied him in a better way than being friends with someone outside the Sano approved group.

Silence continues between the two of them as they do their own thing, watching the sun attempt to peek out of the dense clouds. Sometimes, Mikey feels like the sun, constantly competing with the cloud of darkness hovering above his head, waiting for his carefully crafted mask to slip just a little bit, so that it can consume him and leave him with nothing.

It already happened once with you in that car and he knows that it cannot happen again.

What happened was a mishap. Something he knows he shouldn’t do again, yet he doesn’t understand what exactly he did wrong.

It confused him to no end. Was it that you felt guilty because your religion said premarital sex is wrong? Or maybe he was too aggressive with you, pinning you down until you couldn’t move? It wasn’t like he had a choice because you kept on fighting him every step of the way.

He looks at his brother peacefully smoking, thinking about the earlier proposal he had offered. Come to think of it, what could you have told Izana that could have made him ask Mikey if he wanted to know?

“So, why did you actually do it?”

Izana’s hoarse voice startled the younger man, nearly making him jump out of his skin. Once he got his bearings, he responded with another question, confusion laced in his tone. “Do what?”

“The car incident. Like, really of all the girls, why her?”

Oh that. “She kept rubbing her thighs together any time I said something, and I thought she wanted relief.” He shrugged, but didn't look Izana in the eye. “She was asking for it-”

“You’re lying.”

Mikey goes silent. Izana must have finally figured out that he wasn’t being completely honest, he was way too observant when it came to others, especially his siblings. “I couldn’t stop myself,” he sighed out, finally facing the reality of the situation. “It was like everything she said or did seemed to offend me.”

“Is that so?”

“Well,” Mikey paused for a moment, thinking about that day. He was angry, but there was always something gnawing at the back of his mind whenever he saw you. The voices in his head made it difficult to think rationally and encouraged more impulsive actions, and that was truly the origin of the actions that happened in the end. “I also really just wanted to know how sleeping with her would feel.”

“Fool.”

“Excuse me?”

The white haired man doesn’t answer his question immediately, tossing the finished cigarette to the ground first, before pushing himself upright. “You heard me clearly. You’re a big fucking moron.” His voice is low and strained, fury lurking beneath.

Izana’s words struck a nerve, causing Mikey to stand up, dark eyes glaring right back at his brother. He thought Izana was on the same side as him in hating you, so why was he suddenly insulting him? “If I didn’t know any better, I would assume you’re blaming me and taking her side.”

“I AM blaming you.” He spits out, venomously towards Mikey now, eyes burning with anger. “Because of you thinking with your dick, you risked our relationship with our sister”

“So was I supposed to tell my dark impulses to go on vacation that day? It wasn’t entirely MY fault-”

“You drove her to the most secluded space in school. Do I look stupid enough to buy that excuse?”

Oh this was rich coming from Izana. “Are you insinuating I planned to rape her?” Mikey asked incredulously, not believing his ears. “I met her on the road and she asked for privacy. I didn’t intend to do anything, I’m not you.”

“You don’t get a moral high ground right now.” Izana spits back at Mikey, making the blond clench his jaw. “You’re just as bad as me and you know it.”

“She can go to class and move the fuck on from whatever happened. If it were you in that fucking car, she’d be in a hospital-”

“And yet I went to clean up the mess you made without taking out my dick, you ungrateful little asshole.” Izana hissed back.

“Don’t call me little-”

“You know what I hate about you, Mikey? You’re so self-centered and self-absorbed that you don’t think about how your actions affect everyone else. You just want things to go your way and you can’t take no for an answer.” Izana laughs coldly. Mikey’s jaw clenched tightly, but stays silent as Izana continues to tease him. “Then again she’s the idiot who fell in love with you, so she better get used to that nasty habit of yours.”

‘What?’

Mikey feels like an ice bucket of water had been thrown on him. His mouth slowly hangs open, trying to process what he just heard right now.

“Don’t fuck with me-”

There’s no way that can be real. It had to be a lie or some kind of sick joke that Izana came up with, but he’s not laughing or smirking. Instead, he lights another cigarette, a resigned sigh escaping his lips. “Look” he said, blowing out a loud plume of smoke. “It was you who said we have to befriend that bitch. I’m guessing it’s because you want to get your dick wet and I don’t care. But if we’re going to pull it off and trap her, you’re going to do all the heavy lifting.”

“I’m not interested-”

“Don’t give me that bullshit Manjiro.” Mikey suddenly flinched at Izana’s harsh tone, the use of his government name sobering him up. “I know that you want to sleep with her. But you’re not going to just go in guns blazing. You’re going to convince Emma you like her by doing some grand gesture so that (name) feels like she can’t say no to you.”

Mikey stays silent, mulling over his brother’s suggestion. Izana can see right through him, even to his deepest desires and he knows it’s true. He’s attracted to your body and wants you.

“Okay fine.” He finally gives in. “But I don’t believe she loves me. She probably said that because you scared her.”

“Then you won’t be opposed to making a bet, right?”

Mikey smiles widely. He just wants to knock down Izana by a few pegs to prove him wrong.

“Fine.”

“NGH, K-ken -more please-”

There is nothing more divine to Emma than what Draken was doing to her right now.

It was supposed to be a normal morning after a wild night. She had told Ken after round five, going to round six that she had a test tomorrow, one she absolutely could not miss and he had promised her no shenanigans.

Unfortunately, Ken is not one to keep those kind of promises.

She’s not sure why he decided to be touchy today; maybe it was the two weeks of no contact until you pushed her into accepting Draken’s proposal for a date night. Whatever it was, Draken was extra clingy this morning and he managed to convince her to let him eat her out for good luck.

Not like she’s complaining, for a change, she’d like to be the one on the receiving end.

Her legs were spread out wide on either side of Ken, his head buried in between her thighs, lips latched onto her clit, sending pleasurable tingles throughout her entire body. Yellow eyes cast down to Draken, her hand gripping his long blond hair, forcing him to stay put.

She let out soft moans at the gentleness of his tongue, the way his large fingers rubbed the sides of her waist to keep her grounded, occasionally rolling his tongue to her hole, before trailing back up to her clit. The girl felt her back lift from the bed, arching in a perfect circle, her heels digging into the bed. Ken hums into her pussy, sending vibrations onto her clit and a wave of electricity down her spine.

“Ken, fuck more-” she gasped, feeling his long tongue swipe up her clit, his mouth engulfed around her pussy. “- right there, k-keep g-going ah”

Emma felt like she was in cloud nine, so high with bliss underneath Draken’s touch. Whenever she was with him, all her problems disappeared for a moment and everything felt so, so good. She didn’t have to think about university or lecturers sucking up to her because of her affiliations. She didn’t have to think about Mikey and Izana bothering her.

She didn’t have to think about you.

You with your soft gaze, laughing gently at whatever joke she might have told you -it wasn’t that funny and yet Emma found herself smiling along with you. Your smile, so beautiful when genuine it reflects in your eyes. Your warm skin that she looks for any excuse to touch, to feel you. The way you looked at her shocked when she showed you the knowledge she retained from Taekwondo, underneath her sweaty body, your chest rising and falling.

‘Shit. I’m not supposed to be thinking about this now when Draken’s here. Not again’ She panicked, trying to focus on Draken’s ministrations again.

But her thoughts kept drifting back to you. Emma’s strong hands securing your thighs, pushing you down to her face until you're on top, her tongue working on your clit and hole while Draken eats her out as well.

It was too late, the mere thought sent a wave of electricity to her clit, combined with Draken’s touch.

Her two favorite people, sandwiched between them. You’re more innocent, unskilled and Emma is willing to let both her and Draken pamper you, his large hands cupping your breast as he fucks into her while you grind on her face. Or you on the bed, Emma watching Draken fuck you stupid while she touches herself to the sight.

‘F-fuck it.’ She relishes in his touch and her imaginations, now switching to just you and her, your bodies pressed together as she rubs her clit on yours, gently kissing you. ‘I want her so bad shit. I-i want her so bad-’'

Emma cried out as she orgasmed hard, white filling her vision. Draken’s tongue worked her through the feeling, letting her grind on his face as she rode it out until she couldn’t, falling flat on her back on the pillows.

She tried to catch her breath the moment it was over, mulling over the feeling of post euphoric bliss. Draken crawled from between her legs and laid on top of her, lowering his lips to hers in an open mouthed kiss. She hummed, relishing her taste on his tongue, secretly wishing yours was on it too.

The man pulled away, resting his forehead on hers, just staying in silence with her as he usually did after a session. A pang of post nut guilt hit her for thinking about you like that. It felt so wrong and disrespectful, especially knowing how well you trusted her and how she cherishes you so much.

You’re her friend, she’s not supposed to imagine you in such vulnerable positions, not when you probably wouldn’t be comfortable with such thoughts and not when she is in bed with someone else.

Not when you might not have feelings beyond friendship.

She didn't realize her face was scrunched up in a frown until Draken rested his large palm to her face and pressed his finger between her brows, rubbing circles in the space. “Stop frowning, you’ll get wrinkles.” He joked, trying to lighten the mood. “At least that’s what you told me.”

She rolled her eyes in response, swatting his hand away as she shoved her guilt at the furthest corner of her mind. “It’s a stupid myth I told you so that you stop scaring my other friends that don’t know you. And there’s nothing wrong with wrinkles.”

He smiled mischievously, the kind that Emma was used to when he was about to push her buttons like always. “So what’s with all the beauty products?”

“Get off my case Ken.” she hissed at him, but there was no malicious intent behind her tone.

“Besides you and Mikey steal my very expensive products any time either of you come here. Buy your own shit.”

“You steal the fries off my plate, too.”

“The fries are 5 dollars, Ken, you’ll live.”

They fell into a comfortable silence, still laying on their bed to catch their breaths as Emma’s thoughts began to drift back to you. It has been some months since she started to see you in that way. She didn’t know how she developed these feelings nor could she pinpoint the day they started. It doesn’t surprise her though, you were just her type; soft-spoken, genuinely kind and so innocent, the kind of person she’d want to shield from the world forever. And in terms of looks, god you were gorgeous in her eyes, like a painting that the artist took his time to create.

It wasn’t like she didn’t try to bury her feelings for you. She figured you liked Mikey when she saw the stars in your eyes any time you looked at him and tried her best to set you both up, only for her plan to slap you in the face when Mikey treated you like dog shit. She switched gears to Izana but that even went so much worse that she had to step in.

Emma doesn’t understand why they hated you. You had done nothing but respected them, no matter how much they both hurt you. How could anyone hate you really? You were just so fragile, so quiet and you avoided trouble, so why do her brother’s keep insisting you’re no good for her?

“What’s on your mind?”

Draken’s quiet voice brought her back to reality, and she let out a quiet sigh, rolling her body to face him. “Just thinking about (name).” she mumbled, her eyes meeting his. “And how I royally fucked up by trying too hard to introduce her to Mikey and Izana.”

He hums in response, his brows furrowed together. “Mmh.” He shifts his body a bit to reach out his hand, stroking her face. “Mikey’s so cruel to the poor girl. If I were her, I’d hate his guts by now. Izana too.”

“I don’t think she’s capable of hating anyone.” Emma sighs softly for the umpteenth time, leaning into his touch. You’re not the type of person who can hate someone for treating you badly, no matter what. You’re so insistent on forgiveness, even though you’re in so much mental anguish that it baffles Emma. “The other day after my fight with Izana, she insisted I should talk to my brothers and forgive them, that she understands where they’re coming from. I think…” Emma pauses. “... it’s because she likes Mikey a lot, y'know. That’s why she’s so insistent on forgiving him.”

Draken’s expression darkens at the statement, his hand stopping mid-stroke. The once calm atmosphere basking in the warm afterglow of their lovemaking had turned ice cold, tension hanging in the air and it sort of scared Emma.

“Babe?”

Whatever it was that had crossed Draken’s mind quickly changed on hearing her frightened voice. He quickly shifted back to his warm gaze, stroking her hair again. “I’m sorry. I was just…” he trails off, a sigh escaping his lips as he recomposes himself. “There’s something I actually want to tell you-”

Draken’s words cut off as her alarm went off. Emma groaned outwardly, realizing that it was already time for her to start getting dressed for her important test. Reluctant, the blonde rolled off the bed nude and walked towards the bathroom.

“So sorry Ken.” She murmured, opening the door to the bathroom. “But I’ve got to go to class soon. Plus, I’m picking up (name) since she doesn’t have a ride there and I don’t want her to spend the little money she has on a bus fare. You can tell me later right?”

Emma doesn’t see the despair on Draken’s face. “Yeah. I’ll call you after class.”

“Thanks, you’re the best.”

A LONG time ago, you dreamed of freedom.

You wanted to do something with your life other than the carefully crafted plans your parents had for you. You were told women belonged in the kitchen, that they should always be hairless, stand behind their husbands, and seen but not heard. That life felt like prison; cold and unloving, with nothing else to do. Your father wouldn’t even let your mother have female friends, because it would encourage gossiping and his wife should never be involved with gossip.

Despite your mother being on the more introverted side, you could still see the terrible loneliness in her eyes. She was like a bird in a cage, forced to sing for people when they have guests, serving them with a smile, but not too bright, otherwise your father would have an issue with her.

You didn’t want to become like your mother, so you ran right into another cage that you can’t see yourself getting out of.

You stare at yourself in the toilet mirror as the faucet runs, your heart dropping at how terrible and haggard you look right now. Not only did you have to deal with Izana’s subtle threat hanging over your head, but the test you had written the day after was also terrible, as if you’d forgotten everything you had studied for. You still have no luck in finding a job and those nightmares of Mikey continue to plague you.

Within a span of a few weeks, your life had been thrown into chaos. You miss the days where you were worried about getting the approval of Mikey and Izana, where you didn’t know the uglier sides of them and how far they would be willing to go to keep you quiet.

“I shouldn’t have gone to that party. I should have stayed back and dealt with it.” Your voice is low, strained from all the crying you’ve done since you excused yourself from your hangout with Emma.

Emma.

You can’t even tell your best friend all your heartaches. Even ignoring what Izana said, just seeing her chat about her date with Draken, a smile plastered all over her face, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell her. You’re no longer confident that she would stand up for you, seeing how Izana was so convincing that you believed everything he said about the entire situation being your fault.

‘I need to face reality. I’m just someone she met a few months ago and those are her brothers she’s lived with for years. Why would she believe me over them?’

You were told that God doesn’t give you burdens He knows you cannot bear, but this one might be too heavy for you to carry.

Reaching for the faucet, you hastily splashed water on your face, trying to calm yourself down. Worse things have happened to you, worse things will happen to you and this is just one of them. You can bear the pain, the shame of letting that happen to you, so long as you never let it repeat itself again.

“I’ll stay away from them.” You say out loud, staring at your reflection in the mirror. It’s a promise; you know it’s the only way to get them off your back. If you make sure Emma spends less time with you and more with them, they’ll leave you alone. “I won’t be a bother or attend any of their parties or force myself into their friend groups. I’ll just be Emma's friend and that’s it.”

A sigh escapes your lips as you stare in the mirror again. Easier said than done.

You touch up your face a little, putting on your lip balm and redoing your hair. You force a smile onto your face, adjusting your blue dress and walk out of the bathroom with false confidence that could kill a sensible man. You held your head up high as you made your way back to the canteen; life gets harder on a daily basis, but at least you have a chance at making things easier for yourself.

‘Avoid the brothers, find a job, study harder.’ You repeat to yourself as you make your way back to the canteen where Emma was waiting for you. You still long for freedom to live a life you chose for yourself and you won’t let anyone ruin that for you. It’s merely a stumbling block that you’ll get over. In ten years time, you’ll forget about your terrible childhood, you’ll forget what Mikey did to you and how Izana made you feel like everything was all your fault.

Someday, you’ll live your dreams that seem so far away.

‘I’ll live in a house that I love, I’ll have a job and maybe a pet. I’ll have more friends and I’ll be ha-’

Your thoughts die the second they come in your line of sight.

Mikey sits on one side of Emma, making a pouty face while she laughs at him. Izana sits on the other side with his cheek resting on his hand, a humorous smirk plastered on his face. To everyone else, it looks like a family having a fun time, bonding and laughing together, but to you, it's a mocking gesture, reminding you of your place in Emma’s life and how much worth you have. That they can do what they like and not feel the slightest bit of guilt while you spend days crying and washing out the dirt off your body until your skin feels raw.

Mikey is the first person to notice you, dark eyes looking into yours and for a brief moment he stares blankly at your frozen figure standing a few feet away, before switching to a more sincere look.

“Oh uh, (name),” the way your name rolls off his tongue makes you anxious. It’s so calm and reserved, like you’re old friends that haven’t seen each other in ages. Like he wasn’t the same man that forced himself on you in his car. “We've been waiting for you. You spent a lot of time in the bathroom, are you still sick?”

If you weren’t feeling sick before, you do now. He sounds genuinely worried and if you were as clueless as Emma, you would have believed he was. The others turn their attention towards you and you feel even more nauseous when Izana gives you a worried frown, yet his eyes are full of mirth.

He finds this entire situation entertaining.

Everything inside you wants to scream at them, tell them to just stop whatever they are trying to do, but all you do is stand and stare at them blankly.

“You’re shaking. Come on, sit down, before you fall.” Emma teases, thinking that you’re shaking because you were nervous and not angry. “Geez guys, look at what being mean to her has done. She’s scared of you guys! You better hope she accepts your apology.”

An apology. They were here to give you a fake apology. After everything they had done to you, they had the audacity to come here to offer you an apology they didn’t even mean, just to get in Emma’s good graces again, and she bought every single bit of it.

“We’re really sorry for being mean to you.” Izana chimes in a remorseful tone, but he doesn’t mean it, not even the slightest bit. “I shouldn’t have called you a whore or made fun of you like that.”

They could have done this earlier. Right after the party. You wouldn’t have minded the fake apology as long as Emma was happy and you all could be cordial with each other. But they chose to ruin your life first, before going ahead to apologize, as if it would mean anything to you. As if it would undo the damage they have caused.

“I was a jerk.” Mikey says in a very apologetic tone that could have anyone else fooled. “All these months, I assumed you were coming between us and I let jealousy push me to do things I never meant to. Let’s put the past behind us and be friends.”

‘Be friends?’

Frustration bubbles up at the bottom of your chest, your heart pounding loudly against your chest as you look at the two men who made your life a living hell. All this time, you were planning on ignoring them and moving on with your life like nothing happened but they just won’t do the same, despite them hating you. Was this just to torment you until you left Emma permanently?

Why are they doing this to you?

Right now, you want to tell them no, you don’t want to ever be friends with them, you can forgive them but you want nothing to do with them. But everyone else in the cafeteria is staring, expectantly waiting for your answer. You know if you say anything now, your life will be ruined. No one in this cafeteria will be on your side, either out of fear of the Sano family connection or loyalty to them.

Yet again, you’ve lost.

Pushing down your anger and frustration to the bottom of your heart, you decide it is best to accept their apology publicly and keep your sentiments to yourself, a forced smile on your lips. “I-it’s alright. I know everything you’ve done is all for Emma.” It’s technically not a lie, but it isn’t true either. You take your seat right across the rest of the Sanos quietly, feeling everyone’s watchful gaze on you, picking up your drink in shaky hands. “I forgive you both. Let’s put the past behind us.”

Your heart drops further to your stomach when you realize what you had just said. You feel even worse when you realize you meant every word: that you forgive them, because you’re tired of being angry. You’re tired of holding them in your heart and making plans to avoid them. If you were going to keep secrets from Emma, then you’ll have to actually put it behind you or it would eat you alive.

Anyone else who knew your situation would have called you a moron for doing so, but when you look at Emma, who is smiling at her brothers, you know you did what you think is the right thing and you did it for the right reason.

Love.

Right.

YOU feel overwhelmed.

With your dwindling savings and the looming fear of failure concerning your tests hanging over your head, it feels like the world is throwing one curveball after another at you. Applying to jobs had been even more disappointing. Apparently, no one wanted to take in a college student who was fired from her last job, not especially after that scathing recommendation letter from your former employer that said very concerning things about you.

You know it won’t be long until you have nothing left and time is running out for you. At this rate if you don’t get any job, you might have to ask someone for a loan or financial aid. But you don’t want it to get to that.

‘I still have some time before then. I can get a new job, no matter what it is.’

With no classes for the rest of the day, you decide to keep searching for jobs with a renewed vigor. pulling yourself up and googling jobs with vacancies, writing applications and reviewing them before sending it to multiple places. You’re sure if you send a hundred applications, one will definitely call you back. You kept sending application after application until you lost count of how much you’ve put out. Your back aches from being hunched over to type on your phone, your eyes are blurry from staring at the screen for so long and your mouth feels dry but you don’t stop sending mails.

Immersed in your application, you don’t realize that someone is practically pounding on the door of your room until the door flies open, Emma barging in, guns blazing with a terrified look on her face. You exit out of your email app and close your tabs quickly just as she comes in, screaming your name with a shaky voice.

“(Name)? (Name)!”

You rush towards her, panicking that something terrible might have happened to her. Grabbing her by her shoulders, you hold her in place, trying to calm her down. “I’m here, I’m here. Are you okay? Did something happen? Are you hurt?”

For a few seconds, it’s as if Emma can’t register that it’s you holding her, struggling in your grasp until she looks at your face. Her eyes lit up in recognition, a sigh of relief escaping her lips only for her relieved face to turn furious, like she’s angry at you.

Scratch that, she IS angry at you.

“For god’s sake (name) don’t scare me like that!” You look at your best friend, clearly puzzled by her answer to your question as you release her shoulders. As if reading your mind, Emma adds; “I’ve been knocking on your door for the past ten minutes and when you didn’t answer, I called you again for five minutes but it said your line was busy! So I panicked. I thought something had happened to you.”

‘Whoops’

You put your phone on do not disturb because you didn’t want any distractions while you were applying for jobs. You also never told anyone that you had lost your old job and you were looking for a new one, especially not Emma. Knowing her, if she knew you were fired, she’d try to assist you with money despite your protests. You don’t want to use her kindness for your own benefit, especially in this friendship. Even if you agreed to borrow money from her, she would never let you pay it back.

You’re the kind of person to pull your own weight, not to cast the burden onto someone else. You don’t want her to feel obligated to help you.

“I’m really sorry for scaring you. I put my phone on dnd because I was busy-”

“You never, EVER put your phone on DnD, even when you’re doing your homework.”

Now she sounds suspicious, the last thing you want. Knowing yourself, you find it hard to lie and Emma can be persuasive in figuring out secrets, like how she had convinced you to tell her you had a crush on her brother when you first met her.

You really don’t want her to find out this secret.

It’s as if for the first time someone hears your prayers for once because Emma drops this issue instantly. “You know what? That doesn’t matter.” She brushed your hands off her shoulders, letting them fall to your side as she walked away. “If your phone was on dnd, it means you didn’t get my message. No wonder you’re not dressed up.”

‘Message?’

For the third time today, your face scrunches up in confusion as Emma walks up to your wardrobe and starts digging through it. “What message?” You ask, tentatively. You hope it doesn’t have anything to do with either of her brothers - two people you’ve been avoiding for a while now. Just because you’ve given them grace doesn’t mean you want to be associated with them. It’s hard to not feel some form of resentment for what they did to you.

Without looking up from her task, she says cheerily, “Mikey and Izana said they want to take us out shopping today!”

Your heart drops at the statement. Just as you feared. Maybe things will never go your way and you just have to accept life as it is.

“Are you sure about that?” The last thing you wanted was to arrive at a place, only to find out your presence is unwanted, again.

“It’s not going to be like the last party, I swear.” It’s as if Emma can read your thoughts, because she dismisses the idea immediately. “Mikey practically begged me to drag you out- Oh this looks cute, come here (name).”

Despite being unnerved, you make your way towards Emma in strides until you’re besides her. You stand there, perplexed that of all the people, Manjiro Sano, who you’re sure despises you, asked for you to come with them. ‘Or maybe it wasn’t like that.’ You try to rationalize the whole situation. ‘Emma might have asked if I could come and he told her to go ahead. Maybe Izana wasn’t in the mood to protest it either, since he seems okay with my presence. Or he wants to test me to see if I’d say a peep.’

“I can hardly believe Manjiro would want me there.” You decide to voice out your doubts as Emma puts a couple of outfits on your body to see what matched. “Or that Izana wouldn’t protest my presence there. Just because they apologized doesn’t mean they automatically like m-”

“This dress looks so pretty on you. You’re totally wearing this.” Emma cuts you off, putting a white fitted dress with slight ruffles at the end, as if she wasn’t even listening to you. You’re about to voice your concerns again when she adds. “(name), my brothers never ever apologize to anybody. Mikey’s selfish and immature when it comes to taking accountability, even when he’s caught red handed and Izana is too prideful to ever admit he’s wrong. But they did that for you. Do you know how much of a big deal that is?”

“You had to give them the silent treatment for them to do it-”

“They still wouldn’t have apologized, they would have threatened to hurt you or put you in danger, as long as it meant you were gone and they didn’t have to say sorry. Sometimes, my brother’s pride is much more important than I am to them.” You feel a chill run down your spine when you register that Emma’s silence could have meant your disappearance. Suddenly, the gun in Izana’s hands last time wasn’t just a threat, it was a promise and it made sense now when he called you a fool for trusting him. “But they laid down that pride, for you. You. Don’t you understand?”

“I don’t-”

“I think my brothers are in love with you.”

“HUH!”

‘Excuse me?’

Your mouth fell open in shock, trying to process what you just heard. Their apology, the fake acting, everything worked well; too well in fact that Emma was suddenly jumping into the wildest conclusions, conclusions that not even in your wildest imaginations you could jump to. Maybe if you were still naïve, you would have been elated at the idea of the two brothers liking you in any capacity. If Mikey hadn’t sexually assaulted you and if Izana hadn’t pointed a loaded gun at your head, you would have believed that lie hook, line and sinker.

But you know the truth. Neither of the brothers are capable of loving you.

You don’t say anything to counter Emma or change her mind. Maybe it’s best she thinks they’re in love with you and live in her headspace that her plan of endearing you to her brothers worked. It’ll keep her less suspicious. “Well, don’t be shocked babe, it’s not just them, even the rest of the executives have a crush on you. You’re a work of art painted by god himself and you have the personality of a fucking saint, who wouldn’t love you?” She giggled, pushing the dress into your chest. “Now go shower and put this on. I’ll do your hair and makeup when you come out. I’ll tell the boys we’re going to be late.”

‘Yeah. Who wouldn’t love me?’

You force a smile as you disappear into the bathroom.

IZANA knows you’re beautiful.

It’s not something that could be denied. Anyone could insult you about not having money or being a prude, but no one could ever call you ugly and mean it. You’ve got that sort of grace that many girls don’t have, not just the looks, but the purity of your soul and a heart of gold. Your innocence is like a white cloth, with no blemishes, no stains, because of your hard upbringing and strong morals.

To him, you would be fun to ruin.

He’s not the only one that can’t take his eyes off you. Mikey’s more obvious with his staring, watching your every move as you walked towards them alongside Emma. Dressed in a white short dress with ruffles at the bottom and a blue lace trim, your makeup is rather cutesy, doll-like even, making you look much more innocent than you usually do. Your demeanour today is not so different, donning your usual shy appearance, eyes cast down to your feet as opposed to Emma’s bright, preppy aura, her chin up and eyes alight.

Like night and day. You two couldn’t be any more different.

Mikey’s the first to react, ever the affectionate brother, pulling Emma into a tight hug the second she stepped in his vicinity.

“Emmaaaa”

Aware of his displeasure about them being two hours late, she hugged him back with equal intensity, rubbing his back to soothe him until he calmed down. Izana notices you looking at their interaction with a longing gaze in your eyes, and at first, he wonders if you want to hug Mikey too. It wouldn’t have surprised him, given how desperate you are for any form of affection, but then he remembers you too once had a family and you had elder brothers.

‘I wonder if she misses them.’

He’s cut off by his thoughts when Emma launches herself at him. He catches her in time, hugging her tight and patting her hair, Mikey also joining in the hug too, dorayaki always switches on his more affectionate side. You can only stand there awkwardly with your hands by your side, looking away from the three siblings as if you’re intruding in a private moment. Izana decides to be merciful enough to stop taunting you with their love.

“I think we’re making your friend jealous.” His purple eyes meet yours as he makes the statement. Your eyes widened as the three siblings separated, stammering out shaky excuses, clearly embarrassed that you were caught staring. “N-no, I don’t mean to- I-i mean I-i’m not… you can keep hugging I don’t mind… I’ll just…”

There it is again. That shyness as you looked down at your feet, trying to hide your flustered gaze away from them. Izana thinks that perhaps his favourite trait of yours is the ability to get so worked up easily, it makes it so fun to tease you.

“Aww, (name), do you want a hug too?” Emma eggs on, making you even more flustered. Oh so you also swing that way, interesting. “You must be feeling left out-”

“Emma!”

Your outburst only makes the three siblings laugh at you for a full minute before dropping the whole thing altogether. Besides, they were in public, any further teasing would have turned into something more charged.

He wonders what would happen if you were alone with either of them.

“Okay, that’s enough.” Emma says, walking back to you and grabbing your arm, pulling you alongside her. “Come on, we came out too late and all the stores are gonna close within four hours. Let’s go!”

Izana follows behind Mikey, until he catches up with him. He realizes his brother is silent, which was odd since he was so chatty and affectionate just minutes before. He’s about to ask what’s wrong when he follows Mikey’s gaze to your backside, lust practically oozing from how he was undressing you with his eyes.

Izana gets it. Your dress makes your body look good and your ass looks amazing in it; if he had any less control, he would have pounced on you in the middle of the mall.

But for someone who said he doesn’t want you at first, Mikey looks like he wants to drag you into a corner and fuck you like a slut right now. Sometimes, he wonders why Mikey chooses to lie and deny himself of things he wants instead of asking his dear big brother for help.

The white haired male leans closer to Mikey, his voice low enough for only the both of them to hear. “Don’t forget our bet.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

YOU’RE not buying anything.

It’s a blow to Mikey’s pride that you’re just standing there, not touching anything.

He thought you’d jump at the opportunity to take his money and run wild with it, so that he’ll call Izana’s bluff about you loving him. For someone as poor as you, free money is like a dream come true. He knows your type of woman; pretty, nothing up in your head apart from books and the desire to want something more. He’s dated girls below and at his financial ladder, and most of the times, the poor girls love to drain him dry of his cash- not like that would ever happen, what’s a few million dollars gonna do to his wealth

It makes him feel less guilty when he eventually takes his own payment in kind, letting out his dark impulses when he has desires to be fulfilled. He drains them of all the love and adoration they can give to him until there’s nothing left for him to lord over.

Mikey watches you from the corner of his eye, the way you take note of each outfit before just nodding and moving to the next one. It annoys him. ‘Do you think you’re too good for an expensive designer brand (name)?’

Eventually, he gets up from his chair, excusing himself from one of Emma’s fitting sessions to meet up with you. He doesn’t miss the way your hand shakes nervously as you hide it behind your back, giving him a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes.

“Oh hey Mik- Manjiro. Do you need anything?”

“Don’t you like anything in this store?”

“W-what? Of course I do, the clothes here are pretty-”

“But you aren’t buying anything.”

It’s your turn to be confused, looking at Manjiro like he had two heads. What could possibly be going on in that head of yours that made his statement so surprising? “If you don’t like anything in this store, I could take you to another place while Emma and Izana stay here. We can meet up with them later.”

You look at him for a few seconds, blinking once, then twice before smiling at him, a bit more honest this time and to his dismay he feels something hot burning in his chest and spreading to his face. “Oh, that’s nice of you,” your words come out in a drawl, eyes half-lidded as you thumb one of the clothes. “But the truth is, everything in this mall is much too overpriced, so I can’t really afford anything, but it’s how life is. I’ve worked in a store like this before, I can tell you that I buy similar clothes in the thrift store for less and save money for my next year tuition while looking good. Quality isn’t too different either and I’m happy.”

For the first time, Mikey really takes a good look at your face, because he’s sure you’re not the same person; talking about responsibility and budgeting instead of scuffing at your feet like you usually do.

He understands why Izana called him a self-centered fool that never noticed anything that didn’t involve himself. The world has given you so much pain and suffering and yet, you work around it to just survive and move on, not once blaming him for anything.

He hopes for your sake, Izana isn’t right for saying he’s in love with you.

“Manjiro?”

There’s a softness to your gaze when you look at him, as opposed to other girls who stare at him like he holds heaven and the earth in his hands.

It’s the same way his mother used to look at him.

He quickly pushed that thought aside, nearly appalled he compared you to his mother. If he didn’t know better, he’d think you love him unconditionally. But that’s not possible. No one loves a stranger unconditionally, there has to be something you want from him.

But that’s fine, you’ll help each other plenty.

“(Name), you don’t know why I told Emma to bring you here?”

“You wanted me here?”

“I promised you I was going to take you out shopping that day in the car.”

You wince visibly when he mentions it, and it annoys him, you’re acting like he did something horrible like rape you. Honestly, if you’re going to keep acting like this, maybe he should just do it, then you’ll have a reason to be terrified of him. “I’m trying my best to forget that day ever happened and put it behind me. You already apologized to me and I forgave you. You don’t have to do anything to make up for it-”

‘All this niceness is making me sick to my stomach. I need to shut her up fast.’

Before you could finish speaking, Mikey called one of the saleswomen around, telling them to come quickly.

“What are you-”

“Help her pick whatever she wants. I’ll pay for it.”

“Yes sir. Follow me.”

You look mortified, about to open your mouth to protest, only to be dragged away by the saleswoman before you could voice your grievances.

From the corner of the room, Mikey can feel Izana watching you both, an amused smirk etched onto his lips and Emma practically swooning over how romantic it was that Mikey wants to spend it on you.

‘Emma buys it. Perhaps I should listen to Izana more often.’

YOU hate being the center of attention. If you knew that this kind of thing was going to happen, you would have doubled down on not coming with Emma.

“Let me buy your food (name)-”

“No little brother, you’ve spent enough, I can take care of it-”

“I’m not complaining about spending money now am I?”

“Focus on getting your kiddie meals, let a man take care of the bills.”

You hate this so much. You’ve heard of the Sano brothers competing against each other for the pettiest of reasons, but you never expected to be one of them. Now, you can’t even eat in peace after spending hours on your feet trying on clothes.

You’ve heard whispers of people calling you a gold digger. The store clerks, other patrons, anyone who happened to see you buy all those things have said horrible things about you. Making assumptions that you must be sleeping with the Sano brothers - their newest attraction and predicting your downfall soon enough because you must have seduced them.

Here in this food court, everyone is giving you a dirty look for not only holding the line, but because of their preconceived notion; you’re not worth the hold up.

And it’s giving Emma even worse ideas, really fueling the theory that they’re “in love” with you. But you know the truth. It’s like when your brothers would fight amongst each other to get a pretty girl, only to use and dump her because she’s just a prize.

Mikey and Izana don’t like you, they’re trying to outdo each other.

“Manjiro, Izana”

Their bickering stops the moment they hear you calling them. They slowly turn their attention towards you, their gazes burning holes into you for interrupting their conversation. You’re careful with your next words, it’s easier to tolerate them treating you like a pinup doll than them hating you and you don’t want to make them angry either, knowing fully well they’ll hurt you the second Emma isn’t looking at them. “I’m so sorry for causing all this commotion and keeping you two from eating. How about you both get something to eat first? I haven’t made up my mind yet, maybe we can get something to go when you’re done.”

You hold your breath, praying to God that they take this as you being an idiot for putting them first and just do as you asked. Luckily for you, your relief was immediate as they suddenly relaxed, mumbling “yeah, you’re right.” And “I’m actually hungry” before doing as you said. A sigh of relief crosses your lips as they finally get their separate orders and make their way back to the private booth they ordered, guards standing outside waiting for you three to be back.

Emma’s eyes lit up in amusement as you came in and sat next to her, a smug smirk tugging on her lips, as if telling you ‘they’re so head over heels in love with you.’ “Seems like you didn’t get any food, (name)” her tone is teasing. You know she has good intentions, but that’s the last thing you want to hear after the embarrassing ordeal you just went through right now. “Couldn’t decide between spicy or sweet? You can just pick both.”

You know exactly what she’s insinuating, but honestly, you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. You feel like what they’re doing is backing you into a corner, it’s going to be harder to believe that both of them hurt you, especially with everything that they’ve done. It’s not like you can say no because they’ll get angry and hurt you again for insulting their pride. And if you do keep their gifts, they’re not above using it to make you do things you don’t want to.

‘Just look on the bright side.’ You try to think positively. ‘They might not go to the extreme since Emma is watching them closely-’

“THIS DOESN’T HAVE A FLAG ON IT. I’M NOT EATING IT.”

Of course. Things can never go so smoothly whenever you find yourself in the company of the Sano brothers.

“Mikey not this again. Ken is not here to put a flag for you and I’m not doing that for you either.” Emma sighs in annoyance. “You’re twenty-four, not fourteen, eat your damn food.”

“I’m not eating this shit.”

You thought it was a rumor that Mikey has an obsession with flags and wouldn’t eat without it, but this being a fact was … shocking. You watch as the man pouts, like he’s not the feared president of Toman’s fraternity but a spoiled kid; it’s somehow cute, the way he looks distraught over his food. ‘Reminds me of my younger cousin who wouldn’t eat unless someone fed him. Specifically me. Moments like this make Mikey seem so human.’

“Come onnn” Emma groans. “Mikey eat! You said you won’t do this again-”

“No”

Emma’s at her wit ends at this point and turns to Izana, but quickly dismisses the idea of asking him for help, probably because it would cause another fight, turning to you instead. “(Name), please convince him to eat something” Emma pleaded. “Trust me, you don’t want to be around a starving Mikey, he can be very snippy.”

You want to reject the idea, but with Emma’s pleading gaze and your inability to say no, you decide to try. You’ve had experiences with little kids who dig into their heels, refusing to do anything, and compromise is always the answer. You think that would work on Mikey too. “Manjiro, we don’t have a flag here or anything, what can we do to help you eat?”

He’s silent, still pouting as he thinks of your proposition for a few minutes until his eyes light up, a devious smirk slowly crawling onto his lips as he stares at you.

“Sit on my lap and feed me.”

Emma nearly chokes on her food, coughing loudly as she drinks water in an attempt to catch her breath. Izana only chuckles at Mikey’s bizarre but not surprising request, continuing to enjoy his now premium entertainment. You think it’s a joke, asking him to be more serious until Mikey repeats his request with a serious expression on his face. “Sit on my lap and feed me or I won’t eat this shit. I’ll even throw it away.”

‘This cannot be happening’

“Manjiro we’re in publi-” You’re cut off by Emma kicking you hard under the table, her eyes sharp enough to cut through glass. Stifling a cry of pain, you turn to her, your voice in a low whisper. “This is too much. What if someone see us-”

“And so what? This is your chance to cozy up with Mikey. He’s willingly let you touch him which means he definitely likes you. You have to stop being shy about your own affection.” She hissed back. You want to tell her that this has nothing to do with being shy with your affection, but has everything to do with Mikey’s previous actions whenever you got too close to him. “And there’s nothing dirty or wrong about feeding him and sitting on his lap. It’s just an innocent thing.”

“B-but-”

“(Name) just please. It’s a private booth, no one’s gonna look inside. Mikey has problems with eating, just this once, please please-”

Emma’s begging eventually gets to your soft heart and you cave in, pushing yourself up from your end of the booth and crossing over to his side. Mikey’s smile only gets bigger as you lower yourself onto his knees so that he doesn’t get the wrong idea, ignoring the way your legs were shaking from how nervous you were. You reach for the spoon to start, only for two strong hands to yank you forward until your ass sat comfortably on his thighs, earning a gasp from you.

“There, that’s better.” He murmured. “You’re much more comfortable like this.”

You’re not, but you know he doesn’t care. It’s his and Izana’s goal to cross as many of your boundaries as they can, just to see how much they’ll get away with.

‘Just do what you’re told. It’ll be over before you know it.’

Swallowing the utter embarrassment and nervousness you felt right now, you picked up a spoonful of food and angled it to his lips, a smile on yours to hide your true emotions.

“Open wide.”

Surprisingly, Mikey’s receptive to your feeding, reducing the embarrassment by at least fifty percent. You take the job as seriously as you can, easing him into opening his mouth and encouraging him to chew and swallow like you would your cousin and he does as he’s told without much of a fuss, his eyes glazed over in bliss, despite Izana constantly looking like he wants to laugh and Emma staring at the two of you like a couple out of a romance story, her eyes almost in hearts.

With more eager bites Mikey takes, you get more comfortable on his lap -apart from the hard thing poking your behind, most likely his keys-, your hand hovering under his spoon to avoid his food from spilling on his clothes. Emma may have a point, there was nothing wrong with feeding him, as long as he eventually ate something and perhaps he was just too lazy to do it on his own.

Unlike the other encounters, it doesn’t feel dirty or wrong, Mikey doesn’t creep a hand underneath your dress or touch your thighs, despite the booth being private enough and the table large enough to cover him if he attempts to do so. Izana doesn’t make lewd jokes about it either, apart from muttering ‘pervert’ and ‘spoiled brat’ to Mikey’s hearing -which makes him pout briefly- and Emma thinks it’s innocent enough to take videos of you two being cute together, sending it to their other friends.

It was weird, but seeing him wait on you patiently instead of yelling at you was nice. It’s been a while since you took care of anyone and he looked so innocent with his puffed up cheeks and bright eyes, waiting on you to feed him.

This was definitely the sweetheart, cheeky Mikey everyone talked about whenever he was brought up in a conversation of attractive men. The one you fantasized about when imagining how nice he’d be to you as opposed to his cold demeanour.

But still, you know it’s not permanent. It doesn’t make him any less cruel, just more human. You know it’s an act, but it still makes you sad regardless.

You wished he was kind to you all the time.

Emma’s phone pings with a new message in the middle of videoing you both, brows furrowing as she reads the text carefully. You all notice the sudden change of mood, from her usual chirpy self to a troubled expression.

“I totally forgot, I promised Yuzuha to help with her and Mitsuya’s project.” she hurriedly began picking up her things. “I’ve gotta go. You guys better drop (name) at her place safely.”

‘No! Don’t leave without me’

You’re about to open your mouth and tell her you want to leave with her, but you feel Mikey’s hand on your waist gripping you tightly, the warning loud and clear: keep your mouth shut.

“Sure Em. We’ll get her home safely. Promise” Izana speaks for you, his eyes glimmering with mischief. Reassured, she pecks both her brothers’ on the cheeks before giving you a not so subtle wink, encouraging you to ‘have fun’ with her brothers.

You wish she was not so trusting of her big brothers.

YOU have a bad habit of denying the ending of a book, until you reach there and realize there’s nothing you could do to save the protagonist.

You remember crying after reading “Lolita” for the first time. Emma had warned you beforehand that justice is never served at the end of the story and yet while reading it, you half-expected - no hoped for- someone to jump in and save the little girl. When you read Macbeth, you hoped he’d return to his senses before killing the king that was his good friend. When reading Hamlet, you hoped he would tell Ophelia he was sorry for killing her father, that he’d tell her he loved her before she died. You hoped Juliet would wake up before Romeo drank the poison, stopping him from killing himself, despite reading all these stories over and over again.

But just like your life, these stories were tragedies and the characters were doomed by the narrative.

You knew Emma had unintentionally sealed your fate when she left you in the care of her brothers to meet up with Yuzuha and you tried rationalizing every action that led you up to this point while in the car with the brothers heading off to your dorm. Could you have avoided hanging out with Emma today? Maybe not. She would have noticed you shying away from her brothers and become suspicious. Rejecting any offer given to you by the Sanos could mean insulting them.

Mikey is someone who hates hearing ‘no’.

‘There’s no point in thinking about the what ifs’ you tell yourself solemnly. ‘Every choice I could have made would have brought me back to them, regardless.’

The car revs to a stop at your dorm, breaking you out of your thoughts. “Thank you very much for everything.” You don’t look up from your lap, too scared to face them now that you’re alone. “I’m grateful for all the things you bought me.”

“You probably need help in carrying all of that, don’t you?” Mikey doesn’t acknowledge your thanks, but you don’t really expect him to. “I’ll help. Izana, you can wait, right?”

“I’m giving you an hour.”

You want to reject his help, but Izana’s the one driving and you’re at the backseat with your properties. You saw him when he put on the child lock earlier on, so you know you couldn’t just open the door and make a run for it.

You wait patiently for Mikey to come out of the passenger’s seat, opening the door and taking out the larger clothes and shoes, leaving you with only the little things like smaller clothes and the few jewelry you bought.

Correction, Mikey bought for you.

You go ahead of him, being the one who knows your room and the two of you walk in silence. Tension lies thick between the two of you as you make your way up the stairs, past the other rooms until you reach the end of the hallway. Like a predator, he watches you carefully as you turn the locks with trembling hands, opening it completely and entering inside. He doesn’t wait for an invitation, letting himself inside the room and kicking the door shut behind him.

Your eyes try to look anywhere but him as you open your wardrobe and arrange your new things. From the corner of your eye, you watch him drop your shopping bags beside your feet and move towards your bedside table. As you bend to pick up the rest of the clothes to neatly fold into squares while you figure out what to do with it, you spot him thumbing your Rosary beads between his fingers, as if he’s deep in thought.

“Seen this with Hakkai before.” He murmurs just enough for you to hear. You almost forgot he and Hakkai know each other, and with your bitter history with the Shibas, you assume that they probably have something to do with Mikey’s notion about you. “What do you use it for?”

“Prayers” You answer. “For protection, too.”

He laughs in response; it’s dark, tinged with mockery as opposed to his earlier laughter with his family, making your rate speed up until you can hear it thrumming in your ears. You know why he’s laughing and if you didn’t find yourself in this kind of predicament with him, you would have found it funny too.

“A lot of good it has done in protecting you.”

You don’t say anything in response, opting to stay quiet so that you don’t argue or agree with him. He has a point, a lot good it has done in protecting you when you wore it that day in Mikey’s car. Or when Izana broke into your room to harrass you. Or when you press it close to your chest in the night, hoping to keep your nightmares away. At this point, you’re sure your sins are too great for God to care about you anymore or hear your prayers.

After all, He couldn’t bear to look at his own son when the sins he was dying for was much too piled up on him, how much more you?

Mikey doesn’t say anything more, dropping the beads back before focusing his attention elsewhere. You continue with your tasks silently, slowly folding your new clothes in squares attempting to make space for them and wasting his time, hoping one hour would come by quickly so that he would leave.

‘I just need one hour to pass-’

“Are you in love with me (name)?”

You freeze.

The answer should be simple, shouldn’t it? After all he’s done to you, every humiliating ordeal he put you through the entire time you’ve known him, you should loathe his very presence. Resentment always lurks beneath your skin whenever you see him with another girl, knowing fully well he could get whoever he wants, he can sleep with them whenever he pleases and yet he chose to not only hurt you, but go on with his own life while yours falls apart.

Yet, you can’t say it.

Your breath hitches in your throat when you hear his footsteps inch closer, his eyes burning holes on your back. You shudder when you feel his hand on your bicep, roughly turning you around to face him. Dark eyes scan your features, before meeting your own, staring into them as the silence stretches on.

“Oh” he said, still maintaining his grip on you. Your silence is a resounding answer to his question and now all you feel is shame. For being romantically attracted to him. For being so weak that you couldn’t hate him or push him off you. You want to crawl up in yourself and hide away from him, so that he can’t see how pathetic and vulnerable you are anymore.

“You look ashamed (name). Is it because you want to resent me, but you can’t? Or because you know I don’t love you?” His free hand cups your face, cleaning the tear drop that had rolled down your cheeks, a gesture so gentle and yet, at the same time so cruel when you couple it with the fact that his fingers are digging into your arm painfully. “It’s okay. You don’t need to cry.”

“M-manjiro, please go hom-”

You hate yourself. You hate how you’re melting into his touch like you’re ice in his warm hands. You should be pushing him away and telling him to go to hell, to stop touching you. Instead, you let him drag you away from the wardrobe towards your bed, the inevitable. Heart thudding against your chest, body trembling with tears streaming down your face, you brace yourself to be shoved on the bed roughly and taken advantage off by force, your pleas of mercy and forgiveness ignored.

Only for him to let go of you.

You stand there, confused as he sits on the bed comfortably, his legs slightly spread. His face looked so calm and impassive, like this was his room, his space and you were the one out of place. “Come sit here, (name)” He points at his legs. You don’t move, frozen on your spot as the realization dawns on you about Mikey’s plan.

He wants you to be a willing participant.

You take a step back, ready to run away from here as fast as possible, but Mikey only tuts in disappointment. “Would you rather I chase you down and rape you instead?” The way he says it so casually, like he didn’t just threaten you sends chills down your spine. “You know fully well you can’t outrun me.”

You swallow hard, weighing your choices as you stare at him. Running away right now would give you a chance to get away from him, but he could still catch up to you if he wants to. Even if you escape him, Izana is downstairs and would willingly hunt you for sport. You thought of hiding in one of your dormmate’s room, but no girl here likes you enough to incur Toman’s wrath.

‘I’m finished.’

Your feet move on their own towards Mikey and his hands maneuver your body until you’re straddling him, your legs on either side of his waist, knees digging into the mattress, your crotch hovering over his. You wait for him to attack you with his touches or kisses, for him to take what he wants and leave you a broken woman, but he doesn’t move an inch, only opting to speak, his breath tickling your face.

“Show me how much you love me.”

“What?” You whisper, confused. What does he mean by that? “I don’t understand-”

“You said you love me, so show me.” He repeats again. “Pleasure me.”

Pleasure him? You don’t know how to do anything. Apart from kissing someone, which you only learned when you stayed with the Shiba’s, you were so sheltered that you don’t know what you’re supposed to do. Even when you asked your mother about how to please your husband, she only told you that your job is to lie down and let the man do as he pleases. Emma had made a significant effort in trying to show you a demonstration, but ultimately you chickened out because you couldn’t risk watching something as filthy as pornography.

‘He’s going to get angry at me.’ You start to panic. ‘I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. Oh God, he’ll hurt me for sure. He’ll force himself on me again-’

“I-i don’t know what to do… I’ve never done this before- I’m sorry, I’m sorry- please don’t hurt me.”

You don’t realize that you’re shaking once again, until you feel his hands slipping onto your waist, gripping it tight to steady you. “Stop shaking. This is why I don’t like virgins.” Mikey snapped. If you didn’t feel embarrassed before, you feel utterly humiliated. Not only were you forced into a situation you didn’t want to be in, you couldn’t even do anything to get yourself out of it.

You gasp quietly as he pushes your hips down to his crotch, pressing your clothed cunt against his hard cock. Your head falls onto his shoulder as his hands grab your ass from under your dress, rocking you against him, your dress lifting up higher and higher until it’s past your thighs.

His hands are hot against the fat of your ass, his warm breathy groans tickling down your neck as he pleasures himself with your body. The friction feels good, much to your horror, so good that you nearly forget what kind of predicament you found yourself in, feeling the ridge of his dick touch your clit repeatedly, jolts of pleasure running down your body, a damp patch growing on your panties. At the back of your mind, you know you don’t want this, but the way he controls your hips to his rhythm, the soft grunts he lets out of his lips and the way his breath tickles your skin, has you lowering your inhibitions bit by bit, holding onto his shoulders to attempt to anchor yourself down.

‘I-i’m not… I shouldn’t feel good doing this-’

A whine nearly escapes your lips as he abruptly stops his grinding, the small pleasure you felt suddenly ripped away from you. You quickly sit straight up, about to ask him what was going on, only for him to say. “You know what to do now, so do it.”

Oh. He was teaching you how to get him off. Of course, you must have forgotten that this was all supposed to be for his pleasure, not yours.

He lets go of your bottom, resting his elbows on the bed, dark eyes watching you, waiting for you to go ahead. You balance yourself, warping your hands around his neck and pressing your hips downwards, trying to mimic his previous movements. Your hip movements are awkward, slow, out of rhythm, and you start to panic. With his dark eyes trained on you, nervousness starts to creep in, your body trembling once again, making your movements even more unpleasant.

You peek at Mikey from your lashes, your heart dropping down to your stomach as you see the increasing frustration and annoyance written all over his face. It makes you try harder, try to arch your back, try to grind harder onto him but it doesn’t earn a sound from him.

‘I’m trying. I’m trying. God knows I’m trying but I can’t do it right I can’t-’

Mikey’s patience with your ‘incompetence’ runs thin, and before you know what was happening, your back hits the hard mattress, his body hovering above you. Panic rises in your chest when you see his darkened gaze, fury, lust and disgust all mixed into his eyes as he pinned you down with one hand. “Can’t do one thing right. You claim to love me but you can’t even make me happy. I did all that for you and yet you can’t do what I want-”

You struggle against his grasp when he grabs the front of your white dress- your favourite dress and suddenly rips it off your body and into shreds, the rope burns leaving marks on your body, your panties following suit. You let out a guttural scream, fear creeping in your veins when you realize just how far gone Mikey was.

“STOP IT! STOP IT MIKEY! MIKEY PLEASE DON’T DO THIS TO ME- I’M SORRY, I’LL LOVE YOU HARDER, JUST DON’T DO THIS TO ME-”

He ignores your screams, discarding the scraps of clothes and using his free hand to undo his belt, his expression blank, uncaring. You kick against his feet, screaming at him to stop but it falls on deaf ears as he drags out his penis, lowering his hips closer to yours. You started to weep, as he gathered what’s left of your slick.

“If you do this to me, I’ll never forgive you.” You weep, tears rolling down your cheeks. He doesn’t react, gathering spit in his mouth and spitting on your uncovered woman hood, before rubbing his cock on it again. “I’ll hate you for the rest of my life, I’ll haunt you for the rest of your life.” He doesn’t say anything, his cockhead pushing through your hole bit by bit until you hiss out.

“I’ll kill myself.”

He paused his movements, his eyes growing wide as you utter those words, but you’re too exhausted to care. “I’ll kill myself if you take the only thing I have left. I know you don’t care because you already have blood on your hands, what’s my life compared to others? but I will kill myself-”

“You can’t be serious-”

You curse him out, the all bitterness and frustration of life laced in your voice. “You made everyone hate me. I lost my job, failed my test and because I was haunted by what you did to me in that car to the point I couldn’t sleep. When you apologized, I forgave you. I forgave you because loving you was all that I had left and I hoped that you’ll change. I don’t have money, I don’t have a family, I don’t have friends, I have NOTHING else to live for. If you take the one thing I have left, I will kill myself!"

It’s as if something in Mikey’s brain clicked. He pulls out his tip from you before he could go any further, tucking his manhood back into his trousers. Through tear streaked eyes, you could see an unfamiliar look in his visage, something you thought he would never feel for anyone but himself.

Guilt.

He lets you go, climbing off your body and standing upright, his hand tousling his long blond hair, immense guilt written on his face. You turn around, away from him and curl into a ball to hide your body from him, nursing your bruised wrists while sobbing quietly. He doesn’t move, doesn’t say anything as you cry, not even to defend himself. Eventually, you hear him shuffle around, before dropping something on your table and turning to leave.

You don’t look at him as he turns the knob, opening your room door to leave.

“I’m sorry.”

“Leave me alone, please.”

He doesn’t say anything else, closing the door behind him silently. With him gone, you peek over your shoulder to see what he put on the table.

The huge stack of cash only makes you curl into a tighter ball and weep harder.

Bonus:

THE look on Mikey’s face was nothing short of priceless.

It’s a mixture of anger, hurt and guilt - so much guilt that could kill a normal man. Izana could only watch humorously as Mikey sat down in the passenger seat of his car, violently tossing his phone onto his lap.

“You won. Here’s your stupid pictures.”

He only smiles at his little brother’s anger, finding it hilarious that his brother would be upset at being wrong about you being in love with him. “Wow Mikey, you really work fast. How the hell did she not know the spy cameras were there huh?” Izana snickered, picking the phone up to look at the pictures taken. His grin only stretches further as he sees you in intimate positions, even one with you fully naked, your perfect tits out on display and tears running down your cheeks. “Come on, how was your first time with a virgin? You don’t look too happy. Did she cry a whole lot-”

“I didn’t sleep with her.”

His smile falls lopsided. There was something strange about Mikey, like he had done something he couldn’t take back. Which was shocking, this was the same man that had paid Makoto - your PA, to put spy cameras in your room, what changed? “Why though? Don’t tell me she made you go soft or something-”

“She was going to fucking kill herself if I went through with it.”

“And you stopped?” Izana scoffed at Mikey. Really? That’s why he didn’t go ahead with taking what he wants? “She was gonna silence herself permanently, no one would have known.”

Mikey’s jaw clenched, but he only grunted, his eyes looking down at his lap. “Just drive me back to my dorm room.”

Izana rolled his eyes at Mikey. “This is the last time I help you with a girl, all that effort for nothing.” He snaps, revving up the engine to leave. “Since when did you get so soft, Mikey? Don’t tell me you fell in love with her while you were on top of her?”

Mikey stays quiet this time, his silence holding the answers.

‘Well fuck. That was unexpected.’

Special thanks to: @officiallyjaehyuns @haikyuusboringassmanager @ilybbg @merrymerrykiss @cockonoi @Rindou24689 @short-cxke @kokoch4n3l @GenAwi @ryuguji-sana @nuyoo @reiners-milkbiddies @kiwixpi @gh0stgirl333 @brisssaaa009 @fushiqruo @kawaiikoalagarden @damidamimongalam @raven-nevra @ilovetwodmen @kodzubaby @straightfromheaven @manchie55 @pikibee @tomeyano @matchamilktea-05 @tenjikusstuff4 @m0onz1 @hapikiou @rainnyzz @Lovelyartistz @lik0 @theblueslytherin @rabbit @kakusimp @Rin-10 @sousydive @torasplanet @playgirlfawn @gumiegumie @kurokawaia @anastasiatheloveofyourlife @bontenxo @satorubby @black-swan-blog27 @asirensrage

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gotham-daydreams · 3 months ago

Text

First Sightings

Day 1 {Challenge Masterlist}

It's just another day in Gotham, until it isn't.

[Yandere Batfam × Gender Neutral! Cop Reader]

[Warnings: Mentions of Suicide and brief mentions of blood.](Note: Unless otherwise specified, it's to be believed that actions involved with harming, hurting, or heavily injuring the self are not talking about the Batfamily or the reader. Still, you have been warned.)

Just some set up, enjoy!

---------------------------------------------

It was another bright day in Gotham. With traffic bustling, the streets full of all sorts of people, and everyone going about their daily lives, as if the city they lived in wasn’t so dangerous after all.

Duke was doing his usual patrols, staring bright and early as always - wanting to prove himself just as capable as his siblings as always, along with just generally trying to keep everyone safe while the rest of his family got some much needed rest. This is his city too, after all, and Duke would be damned if anything happened to it on his watch.

Though, as always, there wasn’t much to do. Even if there was the occasional petty criminal that tried to do some small crime they thought they could get away with - like now, with some shady guy running away with a… potted plant? Geez, Duke never thought someone would steal just for some home decor, but hey, he’s seen people try to steal weirder and smaller things during his life for one reason or another.

“Hey! Heads up!” He shouts, not giving the criminal any time to react as he already deals a swift kick to their back, knocking them down to the ground. The pot in their hands goes flying in the air as they let go of it unexpectedly, but Duke is swift to catch it, and keeps his foot on the criminal’s back. “Where are you even planning to bring this? You don’t even have a car to get away in? Man, you are seriously unprepared.” Duke chuckles, raising a brow as he looks down at the criminal. Just where was this guy planning to go, anyway? Back home? To wherever his other criminal friends are? Who knows, though Duke didn’t have enough information to really guess, now that he thought about it. This guy was unprepared, more so than Duke was expecting, actually.

Nevertheless, a petty crime is still a crime, prepared or not. So, going through the usual routine of his with things like this, Duke just restrained the criminal, and notified the GCPD as always.

While Duke was doing that, the criminal seemed to shake their head, and looked around, as if snapping out of a trance. The man’s brows furrow, and he looks to the young vigilante - only to struggle when he realizes what the young hero is doing, “HEY! What’s the big idea?! Let go of me you- you yellow weirdo!” The man barks out, actions as rough as his voice.

Again, Duke chuckles, “Nothing much, just handling petty thievery. Say, what was your idea for the pot? Doing some home decoration or something?” The man looks at the vigilante, seemingly more confused than before.

“The hell are you talkin’ about? I didn’t do nothin’-!” “Right, okay. I know it’s just one pot, but it’s still something that isn’t yours. Honestly, I’m just wondering why you didn’t pay for it, and only just stole one of them-”

“I DIDN’T TAKE NOTHIN’ EITHER!” The man shouts, only to take a quick breath when he sees that all the barking isn’t doing much, “Look- I dunno what you’re on about, I was just trying to go about my day! Now, if you would just let me go, I’m sure we could clear this whole understanding-!”

Duke sighs, “Are you even from around here? Seriously, who do you think you’re trying to fool with all that bullshit?”

The man scoffs, pointedly looking away, and ignoring the stares people give as they pass. “Fine, whatever, then.” He mumbles gruffly, seemingly giving up… that is, until, Duke is almost finished tying him up - then the man suddenly springs into actions as in one swift action he uses his leg to hook around the put, and kick it up to the vigilante, its content spilling out and causing Duke’s grip to loosen just enough for the man to stand and make a run for it.

It’s a miracle what a batton straight to the head can do, and it’s especially helpful that with enough strength it can knock someone out.

Huffing, Duke brushes the dirt off of him with one hand, seeing as he somehow caught the pot with his other. Though, it’s only now that he realizes the strange contents, making him furrow his brows.

Did dirt… always look this red?

Not knowing what to do about that little detail, Duke ignores it for now, and just continues with his ‘routine’ as he finishes apprehending the criminal who didn’t get very far, and went to return the pot to the floral shop. However, when he got there, he noticed that some of the employees were moving pots and bags of dirt out of the shop.

“Uh, I believe someone is looking for this?” He spoke out, holding up the almost-stolen pot in his hand, with only a small amount of dirt now left inside, the plant… missing, now that Duke was paying more attention. Was there anything in there initially? Was it just… a pot of dirt? Did floral shops even sell things like that?

Before Duke could delve into his own questions too much, a short woman approaches him, age written on her face as it sags her skin and wrinkles it, but still, she offers a sigh, and moves to take the pot off of the young vigilante’s hands, “Yes, thank you. It all happened so fast- he just came right in and snatched one for our calla lilies! Though, for a man who looked so focused, he sure didn’t get very far…” she huffs, shaking her head. The vigilante could only nod, and offer a hum.

Just as the woman was about to turn away, likely to go back to her job, Duke spoke up, “Hey, what’s with all this, anyway?” He gestures to the three or so employees who have been moving pots of varying sizes and bags of dirt from in the store, to outside and setting them to the side, out of the way. As if going to throw them out, or something along those lines - either way, the intent was to get rid of them, that much was obvious.

The woman stops, glancing at the work being done before looking back at Duke, “Just a bit of cleanup, so to speak. Woke up this morning and found that some of the dirt was turning a deep red. Don’t know what it is, but it’s affecting the plants, since- see, look here,” she gestures for one of the employees to come over, and when they do, the woman moves some of the dirt by the flower - showing the lower stem and roots. They look an odd, almost abnormal shade of red, like a strange mix of pink the further up the stem it goes, but the deeper in the ground it grows, the darker it gets, almost turning into a sickening shade of magenta, and so on. “I’m sure you can tell, but I’ll confirm- that’s not supposed to happen. Maybe it’s a virus or something, but we don’t want it to spread to the other plants, so, we’re getting rid of it. All of it.” Handing off the pot in her hands to the employee, she waves them off, letting them get back to work.

Though, with that she just sighs and shakes her head, “Honestly, haven’t seen something like this before, but what can you do? It’s a shame since it got to a lot of the pots, but anything that looks remotely wrong, we’re trying to just toss out. God bless those folks from Star City- said they’ll get rid of it, and hey, less work on our hands. Not like anyone else is willing to help out, but then again, this is Gotham.”

Now that caught Duke’s attention.

“Star City? Ain’t that a few ways away? What the hell are they doing here?” He asks, raising a brow.

The woman shrugs, “Beats me, but that ain’t my problem. Now- if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a job to do and a shop to run, kid.” With that, the woman walks back into the store, and Duke is left on his own once again. A little confused, he lets out a small ‘huh’, but ultimately leaves it at that, but does look at the work being done one last time.

It’s only then that he notices people walking out of an alley nearby, taking some of the pots and bags of dirt the employees are putting down, and loading them into a truck that he could barely make out within the shades of darkness. Huh, weird. How… convenient. Weird, a little suspicious, and Duke was honestly skeptical, but they weren’t breaking any laws, right? Could he just leave this be as is? Though, what would anyone need for a bunch of dirt and plants that were probably dying or something? Sure, there was a certain someone that came to mind, but did that really make sense? This didn’t feel like Ivy, but who else could it really be? Was there someone new at play? Something else going on? Or was it really just some weird plant virus, and was he just overthinking this?

Sighing, Duke just shook his head at himself. He could leave it be for now, though he couldn’t deny it - for people outside of Gotham, they sure looked shady like any other Gothamite. If the lady hadn’t mentioned they were from Star City, Duke honestly wouldn’t have known otherwise, and it was usually easy to tell when someone came from out of the city - so that was saying something.

Regardless, Duke was clearly out of his element here, so he went to just go back on patrol…

… There was no harm in wasting one small tracker though, right? It was just one, after all, and besides - it couldn’t hurt to follow his gut just this once.

-----------------------

Finishing up the last criminal, and apprehending them as usual, Duke took a breath. Patrol was get about finishing up, and besides the usual hiccups and such here and there, everything went relatively smoothly - but damn, the dirt on his suit from earlier was still being stubborn, maybe he could ask Alfred to help him clean it when he got back-

“Hey! Don’t go off just yet,” a voice calls out, and Duke looks in the direction… only to be met with another unfamiliar face. One thing was for sure, though, they definitely weren’t from Gotham. “You’re the Signal, right? Wow, it’s incredible to meet you in person, and to see you in action! Though, I guess you’re about to call it, huh?” The vigilante can’t help but blink at their words. They were from out of town, and knew him? Well… that didn’t happen very often. Hell, some people in Gotham still don’t know who he is - not that Duke did this job for fame and recognition, but still it felt strangely… good? Refreshing? To be noticed and even recognized by an outsider?

Still, knowing he couldn’t just stand there like an idiot despite how surprised and taken aback he is, Duke clears his throat, and manages a, “Uh, yeah. Somethin’ like that, I guess.” Rubbing the back of his neck, he takes a quick breath before adding, “Anyway, what do you want-?” “Oh! I don’t want to take up too much of your time! I just wanted to give you something- y’know, as a thanks for doing what you do, and a general token of appreciation. ‘M sure you don’t get that a lot around here, but not everyone can do what you do, y’know? So, here! It’s just a little something, and besides, you look like you could use a small pick-me-up for the road.” The person hands Duke a small bag, and a coffee cup. It was a little suspicious, maybe, but it wouldn’t hurt if he just… takes it, right? No need to eat it, he can check it later - but he’s allowed to take it right? Not like he has to eat it. Definitely not. Nope.

Though, even as he does, Duke can’t help but be confused, “Wait, hold on- who are you? Why… do this?”

The person seems to blink at the question, as if not expecting it for a moment before they snicker to themselves, and shake their head, amused, “Right, sorry. The name’s [Last Name], just got transferred to Gotham for a case. No need to be skeptical, I’m a cop, and here, for proof- I’ve got my badge on me,” rummaging through your pocket, well, there it is. Your badge…

Huh, what’re you doing all the way from Metropolis?

Still, it does make Duke feel a bit better. Not entirely, granted, but some form of better regardless. Didn’t explain everything, and obviously he wouldn’t be any less careful, but again, he’d take it. For now.

“So… you’re on duty now?”

That gets another snicker out of you, “Not ‘til later, but that’s not important. I won’t keep you any longer, I’m sure you're as busy as a bird, yeah? Well, then we best be going our separate ways.” Before Duke even gets a chance to respond, you already turn on your heel, and begin to walk off. Waving behind you, a last, “See you soon,” is said and again, Duke is left by himself, and to think about that odd little encounter.

Were people from Metropolis this friendly? Bubbly? Personable? Weird? Well, anyway, Duke just looks down at the brown bag and coffee cup in his hands. The gesture was nice, if there wasn’t anything weird about what you gave him - even if the gesture itself was strange, and Duke definitely wasn’t used to it. How could he be? Forget about Gotham being Gotham for a second, how was he, as a vigilante, as a hero supposed to handle this? Was just, taking it and accepting the gesture, really the best move? Sure, you caught him a little off guard, but what did that say about him? Especially if a civilian can just sneak up on him like that.

The only thing Duke can figure to do now is just leave it be. It would be weird to give it back, and push comes to shove he can just throw it away. Nothing wrong with that, and it wasn’t anything personal either. Just… caution. Nothing wrong with being careful.

… Okay, he has to stop over thinking this. He’s been standing here for too long anyway, he has to get a move on. It was just a nice gesture, and he already accepted it. He can just throw it on the way back home, no big deal. There’s nothing to think about, nothing to mull over or debate. He should just focus on finishing up, and getting home so he can finally get some homework done, and turn in for the night. That’s all. That’s what should be on his mind.

Duke takes one final breath, before doing just that as he heads home. Brushing off the odd but short interaction to the side, and leaving it be for now.

… So, Metropolis, huh?

--------------------------

When the night rolls around, Gotham is as it always is. Trouble. Though that’s nothing new, and especially not for the vigilantes that protect the city - but if that’s a good thing or not is the part that’s up for debate.

Regardless, just as the day had gone and went relatively smoothly, so did the night - so far, anyway. Couple of thieves and gangs here and there, some sightings of henchmen and trying to put dents in the plans of bigger, more dangerous villains, and even some smugglers - which, Cassandra and Damian were able to track one group in particular much easier thanks to Duke following his gut. It was strange, to track down a truck just full of weird soil, but hey, this was Gotham, nothing phased any of them anymore. Even if that led to a small group, which seemed to be holding some weird ceremony or meeting - Cassandra and Damian quickly dealt with it, and moved on with their night - going to take care of another small batch of criminals that were nearby and trying to break into a bank. Though, again, nothing noteworthy.

It was almost strange, but it was also good to not have a night that wasn’t exciting or thrilling. Left a little room to relax, especially for those that did this practically every night, so it was at least a little nice. As nice as a night in the city could be, that is, but refreshing nevertheless.

Honestly, even Bruce was starting to become a little convinced that nothing of note would really happen - that is, until he was going over something with Gordon on the rooftop of the GCPD. It started off normal enough, with plans being discussed, possibilities and near certainties thrown around, along with what the GCPD could do and so on, though all is interrupted by a new face.

“Commissioner! Officer [Last Name] has new information on the case-! Oh, um, am I interrupting something?”

It’s easy to tell when someone isn’t from Gotham, and when you’re someone like Batman, that becomes even easier to tell. Honestly, if he had to take a guess, he’d assume the officer was from one of the bigger cities. Maybe Metropolis, considering the accent and how the officer spoke, seeing as he lacked the certain gruffness all Gothamites held at the back of their throat. For Cassandra, it was how their body language read. Even if she couldn’t exactly deduce where the officer had come from, she could see they were new in some way, and obviously nervous like any rookie was when they see them for the first time. Damian… well, he didn’t care, and scowled at the sight of the officier regardless. After all, what kind of idiot just comes on the roof like this, and strolls up to their superior so casually? Don’t get him started on that tone.

Gordon, meanwhile, turns to the new face, and sighs, “You’re fine, what’d officer [Last Name] find?”

With that, the officer explains what was relayed to them - something about finding another one of the locations for some kind of cult, things of note that were found at the scene, more mentions of ‘that event’ again, and how the officer that found out this information got a hold of one of the members and wanted to know if it’d be possible to bring them in for questioning.

“And what happened to the other cult members at the scene?” Gordon asks gruffly, quirking a brow when he hears that you were only able to bring in one person, especially when it sounded like there was a whole ceremony going on. Surely there had to be a couple more than that, right? Not to mention that you couldn't have gone in by yourself, Gordon didn’t peg you for the type, not to mention that it just didn’t make any sense to assume that - were all of you folks from Metropolis just so incompetent that all you could manage to do was catch one guy?

The officer fidgets, seemingly nervous at the question, “Well… you see commissioner..” he drags on for a moment, averting his gaze for a moment before looking back at Gordon, “The rest killed themselves before they could be cuffed.”

What?

“How?”

The officer continues to fidgets, but a noticeable and physical effort is made to steel himself, “We’re looking into that right now- some shot themselves, others seemed to take some kind of poison- which took effect when they bit something in their mouths. We- we tried to stop some of them so that we could take in more members! Though… some already, uh, ‘got to it’ the moment we arrived.” It was more than obvious that the officer added that last bit about their efforts to lighten the situation a bit, though it was quickly ruined by that last thing he managed to say. Still, he tried to add, “There was only a handful, no more than nine members at the scene, but… well…” he noticeably swallows.

“I think it’s best you read the report when you’re… done with whatever you’re currently discussing, commissioner.”

Gordon can really only stare at the officer for a moment, before sighing heavily and rubbing temple, “Is this normal?” He asks.

The officer seems taken aback by the question, “Pardon?”

“You’ve been on this case with the others who came in, yeah?” Gordon doesn’t wait for a response as asks, “So tell me, is this behavior normal?”

“Well- you see-”

“Just answer the question, son.”

“...” The officer grows quiet, before giving a hesitant nod, “Yes, commissioner.”

The only response Gordon can give is a harsh huff before he pulls out a cigarette, and lights it, “Just my god damn luck.”

Underneath the cowl, Bruce furrows his brows. Usually when strange activity starts to spike, he’s the first to know about it. He should be the first to know about it. However, besides an odd feeling he’s been having for the past few days, he hasn’t seen anything notable during his patrols. The fact that this was news to him immediately struck Bruce as a problem, and a very big one at that. If there was a cult in Gotham that killed themselves the moment they got caught - he shouldn’t know about it. Caught onto it first, but how had he not until now? Until tonight of all nights?

Aiming to correct this problem quickly, Bruce takes a step forward, “Commissioner,” he calls out gruffly, voice low, and holding a certain edge to it now. One that was more prominent now.

Gordon looks over to Batman as he takes a brag, letting the smoke escape his lungs with a harsh exhale, “A cult of sorts has been running around, trying to do who knows what, or why. Apparently, these guys,” he gestures to the officer who’s now standing there awkwardly, just a few steps away from the door, “have been following and trying to put a stop to this group for a while now. Even followed them all the way from Metropolis- and insisted on offering help, since we got enough problems to deal with here.”

They came all the way from Metropolis? Well, that didn’t make any sense. Especially considering the hero that looks over that city. How has this cult been able to come all the way to Gotham? How do they even still exist to begin with if they came from Metropolis? Something isn’t adding up here.

“Metropolis?” Bruce then looks to the officer, who immediately tenses under the gaze of the vigilante, “Who's behind the case?”

“That- that would be officer [Last Name]- uh, sir?” When Bruce narrows his eyes, the officer corrects himself, “I- I mean detective Greenwood!”

The older vigilante huffs through his nose, but accepts the response for now. At least this gives him places to start, even if it’s not much right now, Bruce could work with it. He’s worked with less before.

Even so, he moves onto the most obvious question, “Is the detective here right now?”

“I don’t believe so- I don’t think he even came in tonight,” talk about convenient, “but- but officer [Last Name] should’ve just gotten back, and- and some of the others are around the station!” Bruce only looks to the door, and out to the city before looking back at the unnamed officer.

As if understanding the silent ‘command’, the officer shuffles to the side with a slight shiver, and Bruce walks through the door, going down into the station. Cassandra and Damian, who have been watching and just sort of listening to everything, look at each other. Some kind of silent conversation seems to pass in between them before Cassandra offers a shrug, and Damian sucks his teeth. As they move to follow after Bruce, the officer moves away a bit more, and eventually looks at Gordon once the younger vigilantes head down the stairs.

“Are they… always like this?”

“You get used to it.”

———————————

It wasn’t hard to find the people the unnamed officer was talking about as Bruce could see a couple of people moving someone in cuffs to a prison cell, and the blood on some of their clothes also gave them away. They were only small splatters, but evident all the same, and the smell gave away what couldn’t be seen regardless. You seemed to stand out - having the most blood on you, and given the explanation from earlier, it was obvious who did and didn’t rush in immediately. The sight… must’ve been gruesome.

Regardless, despite how busy the station was, Bruce was able to make his way through without much trouble - people naturally moved out of his way, and despite moving silently, it’s like everyone knew to avoid him and not get in his way. The same could be said for Cassandra and Damian, albeit for different reasons.

Getting information was relatively easy, and most of the people in your little group were fairly cooperative, which definitely helped. Everyone shared the extent that they knew about what was happening, and gave some information about how it related back to some things they had seen in Metropolis, which in itself was especially interesting and appreciated. The main thing Bruce could take away was that whatever was happening was nothing new. If anything, the only thing ‘new’ about it was the sudden transfer from Metropolis to Gotham - to which, only you were skeptical if that was even new at all. Aside from that, however, most of what you and the other officers who came in from Metropolis had seen in Gotham, you’ve seen before. For how long? Well, Bruce had yet to get a definite response, and only you seemed to get him closer to an actual number than anyone else.

Speaking of, you were the only one who had personally come up to him first, saying, “You’re Batman, correct? I assume you’re here to talk about the case? I’m officer [Last Name], and have been working with detective Greenwood the longest.” Which wouldn’t be so odd if not for the small detail that you had also introduced yourself first. You were straight to the point, mentioned your position, relation to the case, and really, it was a little too convenient if Bruce had a say about it.

Regardless, speaking to you was just as easy as it was for the others, and if anything, Bruce hardly had to speak at all - like you already knew the information he was going to ask for. Your words were short, kept to the point, but not vague or misleading. Despite your monotone, almost cold voice, and looking as if you had no energy left, you explained what you could and gave what you were able to with what you personally experienced, but also had learned by working so closely with Greenwood. You held the same tone and directness when Damian rarely pitched in a remark or question of his own.

Safe to say, when the night came to an end, and the family headed in for the night, Bruce didn’t even bother trying to sleep as he got straight to work. It was time to catch up on some things, and he’d be damned to fall behind on things happening in his city.

#yandere batfam #yandere dc #yandere batfam x reader #yandere dc x reader #gn reader #yandere x gn reader #yandere batfamily #yandere batfamily x reader #tw suicide mention #the red dawn

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samkerrworshipper · 4 months ago

Text

the lawn is dead

it’s suicide awareness month and i want to emphasise the importance of reaching out. you are loved. there are options. you will be missed. suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems. you can get better. you are not a lost cause. talk to somebody.

warnings: reader discretion advised. heavy suicide, self harm, depression themes

There was an overall assumption that all children were born innocent.

Not you.

You swore that when you were born, a coin was flipped, and it landed on the complete wrong side.

Sometimes you felt like your brain and body were disconnected, that everything inside of you worked separately, like you were a sewed together body on the inside, a internal frankenstein.

It was tough feeling like you didn’t belong in your own boyd, but it was even harder when you knew that you were an imposter inside.

It was ironic, that you had imposter syndrome, and yet there was nothing wrong with your life.

There had been.

Had. No longer. Past tense.

You’re supposed to be happy, you suppose. You have the world at your feet, you have the life everybody wants, the world is your oyster.

It doesn’t matter how many times you rotate those thoughts through your split up brain, it never sinks in, because there is a deeply onset belief inside of you that can’t deny the dishonesty behind the words.

You should be happy, you should be utilising the gifts you’ve been given, you should be appreciating the life you have, and yet all of it just feels like a big ball of tangled up yarn, a clump of knots and mess that makes no sense.

You’re not allowed to feel numb, so you try and pinpoint what it is that you are feeling.

Are is too hard, so you start with aren’t.

You aren’t mad, you aren’t sad or it doesn’t feel like normal sadness, you’re definitely not happy, not scared, are not anxious, it feels like nothingness.

Yet nothingness doesn’t feel so all consuming, nothingness is lying in bed down in bed and doomscrolling until somehow 8 hours have passed and you’ve wasted a whole day and don’t find yourself caring. Nothingness is sitting down in the shower and covering your ears with your hands and finding solace in the intense rain noises. Nothingness is driving until you forget where you were supposed to be going and have autopiloted your way to the opposite side of town somehow. Nothingness is being so obsolete of your own body that everything is a fog, nothing makes sense, you’re devoid of all emotions and all the discombobulated sections of your body.

If anything, this is everythingness, this is all the feelings in the world beating down across your skin. You’re itching with agitation, itching with everything in your life and yet none of it penetrates the surface beyond the rotor of thoughts that continue to circulate like the blood in your veins.

It’s like your sitting inside a plastic bubble, and every variable is crashing down against the plastic. It’s all there, it’s crashing down, but it doesn’t touch you, it doesn’t penetrate, there is just a constant reminder that it’s all there. If you try to break out of the bubble you’re forced to face it, but you feel like you’re suffocating and the bubble is slowly depriving you of oxygen.

A part of you wouldn’t mind for it to suck the life out of you.

Sometimes it’s inevitable, letting the thoughts in your brain win, or syncing the truth out so much that it all distorts into a messy mixture of non-emotions that are more hurtful then helpful.

You’re in a weird funk, that’s hwat you keep telling yourself. With injuries and off-season and change of seasons. You tell yourself that it’s unescapable, that there aren’t any ways to escape the deadly habit that is you’re self-inflicted brain rotting and slowly decomposing.

There are outlets, there are options, but in it;s current state you’re brain denounces them all.

Occasionally, you’re brain falls into the same death trap that it was conditioned into as a child. Survival was solely your own responsisbility, there was no leaning, no relying, just yourself and your own strategies that occasionally kept you functioning.

Most of the time you were fine, most of the time you were able to isolate the darkest, disconnected fragments of your body but not all the time.

Sometimes you don’t though.

Every so often, you suffocate yourself, intentionally or unintentionally isn’t always clear, sometimes you’re so lacking on oxygen and everything that makes survival a possibility that you just stop. Those times, when you stop, when you fall, when you plummet. It’s when you drop into the death pit of unthinkable thoughts.

It’s when you get to the part of your brain that you wish had never been stitched up with all the others.

You try and avoid it, if you work hard on a normal day then you can normally disconnect it from the functioning parts that you rely on, but occasionally, when you’re left to fend for yourself that one part that’s normally off, lights up like a christmas tree.

It flashes bright red, like a alarm in the deepest parts of your brain, and it won’t stop flashing until you do something about it.

You’ve got coping mechanisms that you’ve developed over the years, running, football, eating, cooking, reading, sleeping, sex. None of it has even begun to strike the surface, normally your best bet was sleeping it off, depression, or depressive thoughts always seemed to fade with sunlight, it was the moments in the dark when everything suddenly felt… heavier.

You hadn’t been able to sleep since you’d gotten injured, everything was harder when you had so much weight on your back. Weight to recover, weight to get stronger, weight to be the same on the pitch.

It was a minor injury, some grief with your ankle ligaments that weren’t actually injured but also weren’t fixed, it was annoying, and everyday was a drag.

A drag of back and forth recovery and rest that had your mind buzzing from the inside.

It was no secret that you didn’t handle injuries well, you craved the physicality of being a professional athlete, your brain needed the stimulation that it involved. Without it, you struggled, it was clear to everybody around you that you couldn’t function sitting on the sidelines, it had inevitably made you crazy.

You were walking on eggshells, your friends had tried to point it out to you and you’d ignored it up until now.

It was impossible to ignore it at this stage though.

It was all you could think about, the constant pain, the overwhelming brain fuzz, the weight of it all.

Over and over and over and over and over again.

Your hands are shaking, your breaths are staggered, your skin is prickly, your throat is dry, your body is cold and there is a deep set pain in the centre of your stomach that no matter how many times you try and shift it away nothing works.

You’re too deep.

Your whole life, it had always been your biggest wish that the part of you that was broken and threaded together would fix itself, medication made it manageable, therapy made it calmer, but sometimes in life it was impossible to contain the uncontainable. Life was unpredictable, and yet your circumstances were on trend with how your life had been recently.

You should have seen this coming, but a part of you thinks that you did and you’d been content with letting all of these thoughts infiltrate deep in your mind.

Sometimes you look at yourself in the mirror, and you can’t even notice it, it’s like all of the pain and trauma will fall so far from the surface on occasion that you’re foolish enough to believe that maybe it’s all finally gone.

Not now, not at all.

But a part of you wants to make it all gone.

It’s all you can think about, you know how easy it would be, you have it all planned out.

The letters are written, the plan has been made for years, it’s your execution that is lacking.

You aren’t scared, you are more than happy for a big blac cloud of nothingness to come and take you from your life, it would make it all so much easier.

You just need to know that you’ll succeed.

Failure is not an option, in ever single part of your life it hasn’t ever been. But specifically with your life.

If you’re out, you’re out, end of sentence.

There isn’t any recovery, there isn’t any coming back, no psych holds, no hospitals, no treatment, just death. It’s an answer, it’s conclusive. Right now it would solve all of your problems, literally, you could count on every single finger and toe how it would solve the fucked-up puzzle of your life. Normally, there is always something holding you back though. Football had been the main excuse for most times, the headlines would be miserable and all of the fuss and fake-sentiment would be so much worse. Once it had been because you were in love, and that was the best reason. But, like most thing you were unable to keep it alive, and so it died out.

It was all a metaphor for your life, football had been good, until it all slowly self-detonated, love had been good but you were a ticking time bomb of sabotage.

It would be oh so easy.

You knew the tips and tricks, you’d been thinking about it for years. Four long vertical lines, deep enough to need stitches but not deep enough that it would all fade immediately. You wanted to feel the pain, you wanted it all to be a big black and red painful mess, your vision swimming and body giving up because of the pain, not because of the damage you’d done.

It sounded so perfect.

It would be oh so easy, nobody would even notice, it would probably be days before anybody even realised you were gone. You would fade from earth and life like nothing, and nobody would care, and you were happy for it to be that way. You were happy to just disappear, you wanted it all to end.

It’s all hitting that hard, you don’t want help, you don’t want to feel normal, you don’t want treatment, you don’t want meds, you just want to be gone. You normally experience life with so many emotions, too many, but right now, in the bubble of your depression, the only think you feel is a desire to vanish.

There isn’t any hesitation, nothing holding you back as you pick up your poison of choice. It’s always been the same since you were a teenager, you’ve known how you’d go out from the minute it had gone downhill from the very first time. That had been a long time ago now, but not much had changed. Sure, maybe your face had matured a bit, you’re body had changed with being a professional athlete, and you weren’t as self destructive but really when it all boiled down nothing had truly changed.

You were the same broken, lost and alone girl that you had always been.

The same girl hiding in the corner of her bathroom in a pair of sweats that made her body seem so much smaller then it was, a razor blade in one shaky hand and the other hand busy forcing the sleeve of her hoodie up, leaving a easily accessible patch of skin.

It was the same old routine, except this time with a different intention.

You had your scars, you had your invisible marks that nobody could see but you. You were as good at hiding them as you were at your depleting mental health. Over the years you’d learnt how to hurt yourself without leaving permanent marks, you’d learnt how to hide it all from the people closest to you.

Until Alexia.

Love made a person dumb, and being in love with Alexia made you happier then you’d ever experienced and from the moment fireworks had gone off between the two of you, your barriers had fallen down. It had been good, until it hadn’t. Once again, you were left all alone, due to your own self-destructive habits. You couldn’t let yourself be happy, you didn’t know what long term happiness looked like for you and it was terrifying.

It had all been downhill from there, if there was no happiness in the future for you then what was the point? Your life was blowing up, football was the only thing you’d ever lived for and you still had football but football wasn’t for ever, if there was nothing beyond that then what was the point. You didn’t have a education, and whilst you earnt a decent amount off of football, it wasn’t enough to live off of, and now you had nobody else to live for.

Your life, from your perspective, had become pointless.

Whilst you were certain that your behaviour and gone unnoticed, that was far from the truth.

Most of your teammates had picked up on your particularly low mood. You weren’t ever the happiest person in the locker room, one of the more lowkey people who always allowed yourself to fade into the shadows. But that didn’t mean that people didn’t notice you, especially the people who had come to care for you.

You were injured, and that had come to be the main justification for your particularly down moods, but there was also a sneaking suspicion across some of your teammates that something more was wrong, that there was some other kind of cause for the way you dragged yourself around the gym and rooms during your days spent doing rehab.

You looked lifeless, like everything human about you had been drained.

Alexia knew it was something more, in her time with you, she’d learnt about your struggles and just when she thought that you’d started to open up to her, you’d cut it all off. So whilst she didn’t know the extensive history, she knew you had your demons, and that whatever was haunting you this time around wasn’t going to dissapear anytime soon.

Alexia could say that she didn’t care about you anymore, but it would make her a liar.

She’d always hoped that the two of you would make your way back to eachother, that you’re insistence that the two of you weren’t meant to be was overshadowed by the doubt you’d always about the relationship would somehow flip and you’d realise no matter how many issues you had Alexia was prepared to love you through all of them.

But as the time passed from the breakup, you only distanced yourself more. The person that Alexia had tried to bring out shrunk right back into it’s shell. Everyone on the team had been elated to see you find your footing with Alexia, it was the first time in your years at Barca that everyone started to meet you as a person and not just as a footballer. Alexia thought it had meant things were looking up for you, but all good things came to an end.

You’d been appearing like you’d slowly been slipping further down a slope, the bags underneath your eyes getting bigger, your sluggish behaviour getting worse, your determination to do you rehab dwindling and your willingness to interact with any person at the club being completely non-existent.

You were anti-social at the best of times, but completely diverting from all interactions was new for you and Alexia hadn’t been the only one to notice, it was evident to anybody with a brain that something was wrong, Alexia had no idea though just how wrong it all was.

The coincidence of an away Madrid game during the time that it was clear you were tanking was something that Alexia was particularly annoyed by. There was no plausible excuse for her to stay back from the trip, she was the captain, and she was perfectly fit to play. Plus, she had no obligation to you, you’d washed your hands of Alexia months ago and whilst Alexia still felt lingering concern for you she couldn’t justify staying back for what could potentially be nothing.

That didn’t mean though that she was going to just leave you be, not when she was so certain that there was something truly wrong.

Alexia wasn’t exactly sure of the severity of your trauma. She knew that your relationship with your parents was frayed to say the least, that you didn’t talk to them at all anymore and every time Alexia had tried to ask about them she had been met with a cold shoulder. So after a few tries she’d stopped trying, she didn’t know what it was like to have a disconnected family, she couldn’t relate or empathise with your issues and it killed her.

She knew you took medications, she had no idea what, you kept your daily medication closely guarded, but she knew it had something to do with your mental health. She didn’t ask about it, Alexia had been through your shut downs with you, and she knew broaching the subject of your mental health could be so detrimental to your mindset. She let you show her as much as you wanted to, she ignored the scars on your body, ignored the way that she recognised the complete disregard you had for your body. It was clear in every single aspect of your life that you had a little bit less concern then everybody else did. You put your body on the line in football, in ways that made Alexia furious. You didn’t flinch away from pain, if anything you stepped into the line of fire.

You hid injuries, you hid sickness, you pushed through it all. It was terrifying for Alexia as a partner to watch you continuously put yourself on the line and act like it was completely nothing. By the end of your relationship it was getting hard to watch it happen.

Your ankle injury was a result of that, you hadn’t even been the one ton sideline yourself. It had fallen down to Irene catching a glimpse of your purple and black swelled up ankle after a training session and her marching you to the team physio to get it checked out. It wasn’t shocking to Alexia, but it did make her wonder how many time you’d chosen to hide your pain in favour of putting up a brave face and pushing through, in all aspects of your life.

Alexia was worried and yet she felt as though she had no right to be.

She’d let you push her away, knowing that in some way or another it could be hurting not just her but you, realisatically she couldn’t do anything about it. If you didn’t want to be in a relationship with her she couldn’t force you, but a part of her thought she might have let go a little to easy.

For her, you would be the one that got away.

She wasn’t ready to let you get away yet though.

Really, if she thought about it, it was Mapi who had highlighted that you weren’t okay, and that maybe it was time for somebody to reach out to you. Mapi had come to care a lot about you, she’d seen how broken both you and Alexia were after the split, Alexia was still functioning though, you seemed like you were losing energy for life as everyday passed.

Mapi had been the one to suggest that she’d check on you whilst everyone else was gone, Mapi being stuck behind with some minor twinges in her knee, it was more precautionary than anything that she took the weekend off. She was more then happy though to be a good friend and spend some extra time with you if it meant getting to the bottom of whatever had been going on.

Her intentions had been to bring around a fresh meal, her mama’s old tapa recipe that always managed to light up Ingrid’s face. If her tapas earned her a way into your apartment then she was hoping to sit down with you, maybe have a chat, watch whatever football watch was on. Something, she wanted some kind of proof that you were okay, that even though you were going through a rough time that you manage, that at some point you would come out of this funk and you would go back to the old version of yourself. Maybe better, maybe you would unearth some kind of happiness from you situation and you would be better off because of it.

Mapi knew the odds of all of that were drastically low, but she was also the optimist of everything, it was the reason that she was so good at making uncomfortable people feel more settled in the team. She knocked on your front door with a extra bit of pep in her, hope that somehow she was going to resolve all of the underlying issues that everyone had been expressing for weeks now but had been too afraid to unearth. Mapi was certain that her approach might actually help, that instead of being the authoritative figure that Alexia, Irene, Marta and Patri were as your captains. Mapi was here as a friend, nothing more and nothing less and she hoped that would maybe encourage you to open up to her.

Mapi waited at least a minute after her initial knock before knocking again.

Your car had been beside Mapi’s when she’d parked downstairs, so she knew you were home. It wasn’t late, but it also wasn’t early enough that Mapi could rule out the possibility of you being asleep. Alexia had shoved her old key to your apartment into Mapi’s hand before she’d left, there weren’t any instructions, but the pure desperation in Alexia’s eyes was making Mapi feel compelled to use it.

Her third knock on the door was met with more silence.

You were probably sleeping.

There were parts of Mapi crawling with the emerging feeling of anxiety, she just needed to see you. You’d skipped your gym session today, something that was extremely abnormal for you, it had been worrying enough for Mapi, but you not responding to her now was sending her into a full on spiral.

“It’s Mapi, if you could open up for me please chica, I have some food for you.”

Mapi doesn’t even hear furniture creak.

She repeats what she said again, and is met with complete silence.

“Chica, are you in there? Are you awake? Just answer me, you don’t have to open the door.”

Mapi, if she looks really hard, can make out the faintest glow underneath your door, maybe a lamp?

Mapi waits a few more seconds, and sprinkles in some aggressive knocks. She’s met with nothing in response.

She digs around desperately in her pocket for the key, her fingers eventually coming into contact with the weight of the key in the back pocket of her jeans.

She pulls it up to the door knob with regret coursing through her veins, she doesn’t feel good about invading your privacy, but she feels even worse about everything else, and it’s all enough to overshadow her concern for your feelings about being left alone. After all, you might just be asleep.

The key makes a click after Mapi turns it counterclockwise twice, Mapi reaches for the door knob, it’s the final barrier between her and you, and without much hesitation she pushes the knob down and it opens.

Mapi shivers with the frigid breeze that comes at her as she steps into your apartment.

As soon as her foot hits your wooden floor she can tell something is off, she doesn’t know what but she can just feel it.

Mapi walks into your apartment slowly, with a quick scan of your kitchen and living space she is certain the room is empty. She leaves her dish of tapas on the couter of your kitchen and surveys the room before hesitantly making her way into your hallway. The door to your guest room is open, so naturally Mapi looks in there first.

“Chica, I came in to drop off some food, are you home?”

Mapi, whilst she can’t physically see you anywhere, has a weird kind of sense that you are here, she’s just not sure where.

The guest room is completely empty, in fact, mapi is sure that there is dust lying on top of the spare sheets. She can’t remember the last time you mentioned having somebody stay, at the very start of your signing to Barca, occasionally girls from your National team would come and visit during breaks. Mapi remembers that time, she wouldn’t have said you were happy, but you seemed a bit more content. It was best Mapi had seen you before Alexia.

Mapi is fairly familiar with your apartment, between game nights, post game drinks and double dates she’d spent enough time in your apartment to know where everything was.

Your main bathroom was empty, leaving your bedroom and ensuite.

Mapi felt like she’d invaded enough of your privacy, your bedroom might be the over step.

But there was the clawing feeling, the same feeling that she’d gotten when she’d walked into the apartment that something was wrong, and she wasn’t going to be able to sleep tonight without getting to the bottom of it.

So with much apprehension, Mapi walks the rest of the way down the hallway and to the door of your bedroom.

Mapi swears that she has sweat through her shirt, even though your apartment feels colder than the Norwegian winter she’d recently experienced.

Her hands are all sweaty, the same they get before any match, she doesn’t know where her nerves are coming from, she doesn’t have anything to worry about, yet.

Mapi knocks as quietly on your bedroom door as possible, she’s made her mind up that if you are sleeping she’ll leave a note with her tapas and take her leave, she doesn’t need to disturb you.

“Chica, I came here to drop some food off, just make a noise and I’ll leave you.”

Mapi waits for what feels like eternity, and after a long stretch of silence she takes the leap.

She opens the door as quietly as possible, and feels defeated when she spots your complete empty bed.

Everything looks normal, in a weird kind of way. Your sheets are made up, almost pedantically. All the corners tucked in and pillows positioned like they would be in a catalogue.

The only light in the room is the light that is filtering in from your ensuite, underneath the door. It’s bright enough that Mapi can see around the room.

She wants to leave. But she can’t, not without checking.

There is a off chance that you’ve gone on a walk, an activity that definitely was not approved by your physios but she supposed you’d never really obeyed them in the first place.

It’s one last room, your apartment seems so devoid of life that Mapi is confident that it’ll be empty.

She tiptoes across your bedroom, everything about this feels so wrong, like she’s invading somebody’s life that she doesn’t even know anything about.

Mapi knocks on your bathroom door.

“Chica, if you’re in there, just let me know and I’ll leave you be.”

Silence. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not even a squeak.

Mapi’s hand is so sweaty that it nearly slips off of the handle on the door, she doesn’t know why she’s nervous, she doesn’t have any reason to be nervous. Yet it also feels like there are a millon under lying reasons.

Mapi plucks up the courage, because she has to, and twists the knob.

Away games are always a weird mixture of relaxing but also having absolutely no time to yourself.

Alexia’s least favourite part about away games is team bonding. Following the first team dinner of every away trip it’s customary to do some kind of team bonding exercise. She understands that it’s important, but after a long train trip to Madrid the last thing she wants is to spend hours trying to get out of an escape room with no phone and all of the younger girls talking her ear off. What Alexia wants is to get back to the hotel and sleep. Yet she’s stuck in a confined space with girls that she loves but wants nothing more to get away from.

Caro and Keira seem to be in the same mindset as her, the three of them all keeping as far away from the ruckus as possible. After two hours of the madness, Vicky of all people manages to get to the bottom of the puzzle and somehow unlocks the door, Alexia isn’t sure of the logistics of it and she doesn’t really care.

The girls all celebrate as the file out, but there is an overall feeling that everybody is ready to head back to the hotel and go to sleep.

Phones are handed back and Alexia almost pockets hers, to tired to look at whatever messages or instagram notifications she has. But it’s the sea of missed calls that catch her attention.

Alexia’s heart drops.

She’s got dozens of missed calls from Mapi and she knows from the minute she sees her call log that something is wrong.

All Mapi can remember is the amount of blood.

It was so red against your white bathroom tiles.

So much blood. Mapi was certain that there wasn’t that much blood in the human body, and yet it just kept leaking out, even as she pressed your towels to your arm, it kept leaking through.

She vaguely remembers going through her very basic medical training. Checking your pulse, it took a while for her to find it but eventually she does. She doesn’t know if it weak or it’s just her shaking hands that can’t pin your pulse down.

She uses a leftover hair tie on her wrist as a tourniquet, she doesn’t think it’s working but she has nothing else.

Compression.

She vaguely remembers her call with the emergency services, struggling to find words but forcing them out of her mouth because she had to.

The lady on the other side of the phone talks her through it, tells Mapi that she’s doing the right things, she walks Mapi through what to do if you stop breathing. Mapi thinks you are, your chest lifts every so slightly every few seconds, but it’s so subtle Mapi swears she might be imagining it.

The lady tells Mapi that eventually your blood should clot, but Mapi finds it hard to believe. Her hands and shirt are covered in blood, your blood, it’s everywhere, red and thick and it’s overwhelming Mapi. Your bathroom looks like a crime scene, a murder scene, and Mapi supposes it almost is.

When the paramedics show up, Mapi doesn’t know what to do, they’re so methodical. One of them talks to Mapi whilst their partner attends to you, Mapi’s hands are shaking, her hands, covered in your blood. She should have taken that extra medical course that they’d offered all the players at the start of the season, maybe it would have prepared her better. Nothing prepares a person for what Mapi just did though, no amount of medical training or training courses could ever prepare a person for what Mapi just saw.

The paramedic assures Mapi that she did everything right, that you wouldn’t be alive without her, and those words make it all worse. Dead. You could have been dead. The paramedic offers to take Mapi to the hospital with you, but she declines, she needs a minute, she needs to have a second to think about herself. The paramedic tells Mapi the name of the hospital they’ll be taking you and takes her name and number to give to the nurses as your contact.

They whisk you off right in front of Mapi’s eyes.

Your body is white, you look so lifeless.

Once you’re gone, Mapi closes the door to your bathroom, she can’t look in there, not at the raw amount of evidence that you’ve left behind. It’s already all over her body, she doesn’t need to see anymore of it.

She sits down on your tight sheets, and she realises that there is a piece of paper sitting at the edge of your bed, a letter.

Mapi cries when she sees it, she lets it all out.

It’s addressed to Alexia and Mapi doesn’t need to read it to know what it’s intention was, what your intentions were, if it wasn’t already confirmed then this only assures it.

Mapi leaves red finger prints on it, picking it up and collecting some of your clothes from your wardrobe before leaving your apartment.

Alexia clicks on Mapi’s contact with so much fear coursing through her body, she’s praying that it’s not here mami, not when Alexia is away.

“Ale-Alexia, thank god you picked up, gracias a dios.”

Mapi’s voice is quivering, Alexia’s not sure if she’s ever heard her voice like that before.

“Maria, what’s wrong? Why did you call so many times?”

There is a sob on the other end of the line, and Alexia starts to pray, to any god that whatever Mapi is about to tell her isn’t going to be bad, she can’t handle bad news right now.

“She was supposed to be sleeping, I was so sure she was sleeping. There was so much blood, I thought, I didn’t think there was enough blood in a person’s veins but there was so much of it, it just kept leaking out of her.”

Alexia’s heart and stomach are at her feet, she clutches for a wall, a solid form that she can rely on so that she doesn’t collapse.

“Who, Maria, who? What are you talking about, where are you?”

There is another sob, a deep sob, like Mapi’s being tortured.

“Y/n, I went to visist her like you’d asked, an-and she was, I thought she was dead.”

Alexia heart feels like it’s on a rollercoaster, like it’s returned to a normal level for a second, before plummeting even deeper.

“What do you mean Maria, what are you talking about.”

Somebody in the group must have realised Alexia’s discomposure, because she can feel a group of eyes on her, like everybody is trying to figure out what is happening on the other end of the phone.

“She left a letter, she-she I thought she was dead Ale, why would somebody do that to themselves? Why would she want to do that to herself.”

Alexia is aware that Mapi is clearly in some kind of post-traumatic state, that it’s going to be hard to get to the bottom of this but she’s managed to string the details together. From what Mapi’s said, you’re still alive, but it can’t be good, not by how Mapi has made it sound.

“Maria, I need you to listen to me. Where are you? Where is she? What is wrong with her.”

Alexia can hear Mapi trying to take some deep breaths on the other side of the line, somewhere in the crowd Ingrid is pushed forward, looking at Alexia with so much confusion. Mapi doesn’t often have anxiety or panic attacks, but if she were, Ingrid is certain that she would be the first person for Mapi to call, yet she’s received none.

“I-I’m at the hospital with her, she’s been moved to the ICU, I haven’t seen her yet but the nurses told me they had to perform CPR in the ambulance and that she was rushed to surgery when she got here. She’s been stable since but she’s in critical condition.”

Alexia doesn’t know what to do, she wants to be with you.

“Maria, I’m going to hand you off to Ingrid okay, talk to her, let her calm you down. I’m going to talk to the staff and try and figure out a way for me to come home, talk to Ingrid, okay?”

Ingrid looks confused but takes the phone from Alexia regardless, allowing Alexia to walk towards the staff, her face sullen and body hurting from the pressure of all of this.

Mapi thinks you look worse, somehow.

All of the wires and cords and the bags and needles make your body look wrong. Nobody should need so many weird connections, yet considering the state you were in Mapi is oddly comforted by it all, she wants you to be getting as much help as your body needs.

She still got your blood on her, one of the nice nurses had helped her to wash it off her hands and arms, and Mapi had stolen one of your sweatshirts she’d haphazardly grabbed as a replacement for her shirt, but she can still feel it on her body.

She’s been sitting in the same chair since the nurses let her in to your room, it’s next to the window, so when Mapi feels compelled to cry, or can’t handle looking at your body any longer because it gives her a flashback, she looks out the window at the bustling city of Barcelona below her and it oddly comforts her. Life goes on, everyone elses life goes on, but yours almost didn’t.

Her mind goes to dark places thinking about the what if she hadn’t of come to check on you? Mapi knows the answer to that question, even a few minutes later and your body would have been even more lifeless then when Mapi found it, except maybe instead of most of life being drained from you, all of it would have been.

They still don’t know for sure what it’s going to look like when you wake up, Mapi was hardly paying attention when the doctors came to talk to her, they were speaking so many words that Mapi couldn’t even pretend to know the meaning of. She remembers bits and pieces, the parts that she knew she’d have to remember in case Alexia called again and wanted an update.

You’d lost a lot of blood but they were working to try and replenish it, you’d needed nearly 100 stitches all together, the scars were all about 6 inches long and just almost ½ and inch deep. You didn’t hit any major arteries or veins, but you grazed one of them and that was most likely why you bled so much. Your blood might have not clotted because of the antidepressants in your system potentially mixed with the ibuprofen you were taking for your ankle. They don’t know when you are going to wake up but they emphasise you sleeping isn’t a bad thing because you’re body is getting the rest that it needs to repair itself.

Mapi doesn’t understand the measurements or the way medications work, she knows your body needs rest but she also desperately just wants you to wake up. Selfishly, even if it’s just for a second so that she knows that you are okay, so that she can stop blaming herself for killing you. She’s always going to somewhat blame herself for this, but you dying would be the straw that broke the camels back.

Alexia doesn’t think the whole way back to Barcelona, the staff managed to get her on the last flight out of the night, with Ingrid.

They both don’t say a word after Alexia briefs Ingrid on what she learnt from Mapi on the phone, it’s nowhere near enough information and it leaves Alexia’s brain stumbling, she’s so uncertain of everything.

There is a chauffeur waiting for them at the airport which takes them straight to the hospital, Alexia doesn’t even pretend to be flattered when the reception staff immediately know who she is and takes her straight to your room. She has one concern. Everything else is just background noise to her.

Seeing you makes Alexia feel sick, literally, it’s a few seconds before she feels the bile rising. It’s been building for hours now and she rushes into the bathroom adjacent to your room and ungracefully let’s her stomach go directly into the toilet bowl.

Once she’s done and she feels less like her heart is going to fall out of her throat she gets up and puts on a brave face, walking back into your room.

Mapi has tears streaming down her face, Ingrid is trying to talk to her but Alexia can tell that none of it is getting through to her.

“Mapi, what happened?”

Alexia wants to know, she needs to know, she needs to know how you got here.

Mapi is shaking, her whole body, it’s almost scary the way that her body vibrates against the chair she’s sitting in.

“I-I went to check in on her, dios mios, it was so cold, she was-she-.”

Ingrid stops Mapi.

“Alexia, we can do this later, she can’t handle this right now.”

Ingrid looks as terrified as Alexia feels, but her fear is for Mapi, it makes sense, Mapi is the love of her life. Alexia doesn’t think she’s entitled to the same fear, she let you go.

“No-no, she wants to know.”

It’s clear that every word is pulling Mapi further and further apart, but she pushes through.

“I-I just needed to see her, I went through all the rooms until I got to her bathroom.”

She lets out a sob before continuing.

“There was so much blood, it was all coming from her arm, I tried my best, I tried my best.”

Mapi sobs again, this time it’s so deep and guttural that Alexia is so horrified about what is to come.

“I tried to stop it. She was supposed to be sleeping, I thought she was just sleeping. She was unconscious, blood everywhere, and it just kept coming, it wouldn’t stop. I tried my best.”

Ingrid is murmuring words into Mapi’s ear, Alexia doesn’t know what to say, she actually can’t think of a single word to say.

“I called the ambulance, but she coded in the ambulance, they had to give her so many stitches, so much blood.”

Mapi keeps repeating the same words, over and over again, like it’s a mantra.

Alexia needs to stop it, for her bestfriends sake.

She walks to the otherside of the room, gently pushing Ingrid to the side so she can squat down in front of Mapi.

“Maria look at me. You did your best, you saved her life. You are no more to blame for this then anybody else is. You did so well, she’s alive because of you, she is breathing and sitting in front of us because of you. You did that.”

Mapi doesn’t look like she believes Alexia, but it’s a reprieve from whatever trance she was in.

“How about you and Ingrid go and get something to eat, I’ll stay here with her, if anything happens I’ll call you, okay?”

Mapi looks apprehensive to get up, but Alexia watches Ingrid give her a look and it’s the first time since Alexia’s walked into this room that she sees a little bit of normality return to Mapi’s face.

“Sh-she left you a letter. I think you should read it.”

Mapi pushes it into Alexia’s hands like it’s poisonous.

“Thank you Mapi, I will, go and take a break.”

Alexia presses a kiss to Mapi’s hand, before moving to allow Ingrid to help her up. Mapi is uneasy on her feet and for a second Alexia thinks she might collapse or vomit. She eventually finds her footing though and follows Ingrid out of the room.

Alexia looks down at the letter.

It’s got dried blood finger prints on it, she presumes from Mapi, it secures all of this in some weird way. This is all actually happening.

Alexia takes her time opening it, this is tangible evidence of all of this and a part of Alexia wants nothing more then for it to disappear, so she can pretend none of this has happened.

She wasn’t even there for it, she can’t imagine what Mapi went through, she already feels like every part of her has been stripped away with this.

She feels like she’s an imposter in this all, she doesn’t know what to do.

You’ve never expressed to her anything about family or parents, she doesn’t think it would be right to call them without your permission. She wants to call her own mami but that feels a bit silly, although she knows somehow her mami would give her all the right advice. She doesn’t want to talk about any of it though, it feels wrong. This is such a personal issue, she doesn’t even think she should know about it, she doesn’t have any right considering that Alexia could have very well contributed to this whole issue.

The letter is white, off white possibly, it’s hard to tell with the harsh fluorescent lighting.

The marks that would have been bright red at some stage have faded to a dull reddish brown, it’s imprinted deep into the paper.

Alexia flips it over, gently opening the seal with her fingernail and letting the flap open up.

The paper inside is the same colour, except even though she can only see the flip side it’s clear that there is black scrawl all over it.

Alexia could make it disappear, act like she read it, it would make it all so much easier, it would save her a lot of emotions that she really doesn’t feel prepared to feel. But she doesn’t get to make that decision, she needs to read this, for you and for her.

Dear Alexia,

If you’re reading this then chances are I’m already gone, if I’m not then something went wrong and for that I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think that any of this was about you, or that you or anybody else was responsible. I made this decision, I’ve been thinking about this long before you came and I would have spent everyday thinking about it, no action or intervention would have changed that.

I don’t know how to explain it, but life is different for me. I don’t experience things the same way, I don’t get happy when I spend time with friends, I don’t get happy when it’s sunny outside. I’ve tried it all, I’ve tried to make it work, tried to live life in my body. I think a part of me was always separate though, and as much as I’ve tried to make it work there is no point in trying to fix something that is always going to be broken.

Being with you was the first time that my brain felt quiet, that I kind of felt the experience of happiness that everyone else feels. You made it all better, everything with you felt better, it felt normal. All I ever wanted was to be a normal person, and you made me feel like that. It’s not fair of me to be saying that, you deserved better then me, it wasn’t fair for me to burden you with all of this shit. Fucked up is never not fucked up, you can’t uncrumple a crumpled piece of paper, it will always be creased. I want you to know that I didn’t do this to you, i did this for you. It wasn’t fair weighing you down, I know it wasn’t easy for you when we broke up, you deserve to focus on football. You deserve to have a good life, you deserve to be free. I don’t want you to feel bad, I don’t want you to feel like you’re responsible. Live your life, be happy, for me, experience it all, because I couldn’t.

I’m not myself anymore, although I don’t think I ever was myself. It always kind of feels like i’ve been different people in my own body, and this time i couldn’t handle it. I don’t want to feel devoid anymore, I want to be free. My identity has always been identified as being a good footballer, a great footballer, and I don’t even think I can say that I am that anymore. I am nothing, want to be nothing.

I’m sorry I never loved you back in the same way, I’m sorry I never reciprocated the endless graciousness and love tha you gave me. The smiles, the effort, the constant love, it was wasted on me and my biggest regret in life will be letting you waste it on me. It wasn’t fair, it’ll never be fair, because I loved you back and that perhaps was the most selfish act I’ve ever committed.

I’m sorry, there aren’t enough words that I could use to tell you just how sorry I am. I’m sorry that I burdened you with me, I’m sorry that I let myself be cared for by you, I’m sorry that you have to read this.

I’m sorry.

There wouldn’t have ever been anything I could have done to repair it, I didn’t want to live knowing that I would forever be in debt to you for this. I hope that eventually you will find peace in this, that some good will finally come of me.

Goodbye.

There are tears all over the page by the time Alexia gets to the bottom of the letter, she actually can’t comprehend what she’s just read, she swears that her mind must be playing tricks on her. Why would you think all of those things? What made you think all of those things?

Alexia feels sick again.

Did she make you feel that way? Did she make you feel like you weren’t deserving of living?

There are so many questions circulating her brain, and she doesn’t have a answer for a single one of them, because she doesn’t know. Suicide was your only option, one that could have been very permanent, it makes Alexia’s head swim. You believed that your only option to make it all stop was death. You found a permanent solution to something that Alexia’s considers a potentially temporary situation, had you reached out, had you tried to find help. She can’t criticise you, she can’t even begin to comprehend how hard it would be living as you have, and then having to try and talk to somebody else about that. A part of her wishes you had though, because maybe it would have saved her beind here.

Your body is the exact same it was the last time Alexia looked at you, but for some reason you feel different.

Alexia reaches out for your hand, it’s the arm that’s not covered in bandages. Your hands are cold, but she tries to ignore it. She focuses on the feeling of movement underneath her own hand, it’s the only real tangible proof she has that you are here with her, that you are alive.

Sure there is a beeping heart monitor, and other signs, but she just wants to feel you.

She holds your hand, because she swears that she’ll slip away. Alexia doesn’t know what to do, she doesn’t know how to help you but she promises herself that she’s going to be here, that she isn’t ever going to let you experience life the same way that you did without her being there for you.

—————————————————————

thoughts appreciated …. part 2?

another reminder that if you ever need anybody to talk to i am here, your life is worth living, you are worth it all. <3

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tradgedyinwaves · 3 months ago

Text

part two (final) of this

Tw: coma, attempted suicide, successful suicide, death

The first few moments after you were hit were a blur to Kate. She heard the crunch and your scream, her own voice screaming into the mic of her phone as she called out to you.

Quickly, her rational brain took over and she ended the call with you, quickly calling emergency services.

It took them 10 minutes to arrive, 25 to get you out, and 10 to the hospital. You were placed into a medically induced coma so that the swelling in your brain could go down and give your body a chance to possibly heal.

Kate’s next call was to John.

“ ‘Ello?” “St. John’s. Get your squad and get there”

Click.

Kate kept her words to herself for the time being, bag already slung over her shoulder and out the door by the time her short conversation with John was over.

On the other end of the line, John sat still for all of 15 seconds as he processed Kate’s words. Shooting texts to each of the other members of the squad, he grabbed his coat and was out the door.

The team arrived shortly after Kate, who was pacing in the waiting room. The doctor had already been out to speak with her and it hadn’t been good news.

“What’s going on?” “What happened?” “Who got hurt?” “Are they dead?”

Kate stood and stared at the four men in front of her. She only knew from what you’d said that John and Soap were involved and she could see it from the way they stood close to each other. Stepping forward, she reached up and slapped John across the face before doing the same to Soap, tears staining her cheeks. The way the other two men stared, they had no clue about John’s infidelity.

“If she wakes up, I hope she kills you, John.”

“If?”

“Who?”

Kate turned to the other men and sighed, wiping her eyes as she whispered your name. “If, Kyle. Her brain is swelling too much. They’ve put her in a medically induced coma while they try to save her ability to walk.” Kate shot the Johns another glare, vowing to kill them for you if you couldn’t do it.

Her announcement was followed with silence as the four men took seats in the waiting room. Kyle and Simon stayed close to Kate while Price and Soap sat off in the corner. They knew it was their fault. You wouldn’t have been on that road if you hadn’t seen them.

Hours later and the doctor came back out. He approached Kate immediately, seeing as she was the first one there. The others gathered around to hear.

“-lost a lot of blood, but we’re hoping that with the rest, her brain will stop swelling and her spine may heal enough that she could walk. But for now, she’s stable.”

It had broken the team apart. Kyle and Simon were transferred to another team at their request. Soap was sent off to help other teams all the time in an effort to keep Price and him separated. Which only left the Captain. Except, the title was hollow. He didn’t have a team to lead anymore.

Kate didn’t speak to him anymore either. So when he found out you’d woken up, it wasn’t for a couple weeks after the fact. When he did find the courage to visit you in the hospital, he was told you were no longer there.

He called Kate, or Laswell as he was only allowed to refer to by her last name now, to ask where you were.

“Not that you deserve to know, but she’s in the psych ward now. Tried to take her own life.” “I-” “Don’t bother, Price. This is your fault.”

A click on the phone and the call ended. He stared down at the device before throwing it and shattering it. He was weak and in that weakness, he’d ruined everything good he’d had and most importantly, your life.

After a two month stint in the psych ward, you were cleared to go home. Which meant Kate set you up in a spare bedroom in her house. You’d been cleared, so she wasn’t worried that you’d try again.

But boy, had she been wrong. A month later, you’d locked the door and broken the window, taking a piece of the glass and stabbing it into your legs that you could no longer feel. By the time they got the door open, it was too late. You’d lost too much blood, but you were finally free.

When Price tried again a few months later, he was informed of your death.

Seven months in a coma and you woke up to be told you were paralyzed from the waist down. Told you’d never walk on your own again.

In another two, you would try to take your own life.

Another three and you would succeed.

In just a year, the world was left without your sunshine.

John Price and John MacTavish never forgave themselves, living lives of solitude until the day they died.

Spoiled the hell out of you guys today. 2600 words that includes an alternate ending? Damn. lol

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prettyboykatsuki · 8 months ago

Text

on deaths door | s. gojo

✮ tags ; dark content ahead, afab + gender neutral reader, dark comedy / black comedy, attempts of suicide, the use of the word rapist in text, mentions of self-harm scars, penetration, intense but not rough, gojo is doting, no curses au, ceo!gojo 18+

note: this fic is mostly intended to be a dark comedy and have an unserious nature. it is very absurdist and it makes light of both suicide and assault. please proceed carefully if you find this might be triggering to you.

PLEASE READ THE TAGS BEFORE YOU PROCEED.

✮ wc ; 2.6k

✮ a/n ; i actually really really enjoyed writing this and would love to expand on it potentially. KJSDFJSKD.

reader has been through a lot so they are super nonchalant about everything just as a precaution

"Uwah," A voice startles you from your place on the roof. You gasp, amidst tears and sobs from shock. "Are you about to kill yourself?"

You whip your head around to see who could be beside you at this hour. It's a deliberately obscure location, too so it's extra weird. You were hoping to die in peace in a place where it'd be hard to find you, after all.

But there's a strange man interrupting your plans. Very strange. He's speaking Japanese rather clearly but his hair is a shock of white and his eyes are blues as saphhires. Despite the situation, his voice is light and cheerful - almost amused.

You can't tell if he's just a figment of your imagination. He's so unusual it stuns you out of your tears. You can't find your voice to respond for a moment.

"Yes," You reply, unsure of what else to say. He smiles at you.

"Hm." He looks contemplative. "Well... if you don't want it, can I have it?"

You stare on, confused.

He grins. "Your life, I mean. Can I buy it off you?"

Starting to wonder if you've already died, you stretch your hands up to wipe the tears off of your face just to see if any of it is real. The touch makes it gasp. You're definitely still alive. So, that means this strange man is also real and asking to buy your life.

"What?"

"Oh, don't worry. I'm not a cheapskate or anything, the price will be fair." He walks closer to you from where you've been standing all this time. He grabs you by the collar of your shirt, picking you up and setting you down further away from the ledge with a harsh yank.

Like a kitten whose mother is dragging it by the nape, you fumble onto the rooftop concrete. As soon as you're moved, you drop down to your knees - unable to find anymore strength.

"Are you... trying to traffick me?" Your voice is coarse in your reply as you stare up. It's a genuine question. You aren't sure what else to call this. The strange, unusual man just laughs in your face.

"Mm, well - not really. Though, if you say yes I'll make good use of you in all ways." The last part makes your skin crawl a little. "You were weeping so pitifully when I came up here... super pathetic. I just thought it'd be a waste if you died since I got to see something interesting."

There's something really wrong with this guy, you think. But this is such a common thing in your life, you aren't sure how shocked you should be.

There's also something equally wrong with you, because you're so fucked up - you're considering it. If he paid you enough to cover all of your debts, you could cut ties with all the bullshit your fathers debt has put you through. You could run away. Not there's anywhere for you, even after that. But at least you'd be unshackled from what makes you most miserable.

You don't want your life, but if this guy wants it so bad then...

"...How much will you pay me?"

His eyes light up when you ask this and it unsettles you further. "As much as you want. And you'd have to live with me at my beck and call."

"Like a pet." You reply easily.

Instead of denying it, he snaps his fingers and grins. "Exactly! Or maybe more like a plush toy that I take every where?"

Either way, you're not any kind of human. You're barely human now though with how much you work, so you aren't sure it makes a difference. You stare at him. And he looks back at you with a smile - all pearly white pristine teeth.

Who cares anymore, anyway? Even if he were to mistreat you, you're not sure you'd even feel it. It's all numb. He can have your life if it means you can escape what you're running from.

He looks rich, so maybe.

"Don't worry," He hums, and he reaches over to pat your head while your face is covered in tears. You don't flinch for some reason. "I don't like breaking things I've bought unnecessarily."

Something is wrong with you. Your self preservation is in total fucking tatters. But still, you want to say so you do. Maybe it's the absurdity, or the fact you truly don't have anything to lose. Nothing could make your misfortune any worse.

You sniffle and shake your head. He's dangerous and weird, but at least you could pay off your debts.

"Okay," You say weakly.

His smile gets impossibly wide.

You're wonder if you'll regret your decision.

He's filthy rich.

You should've expected that. You did, kinda. Because only rich people would think to do or ask something so absurd like ask to buy another persons life. Still, he had a driver waiting for him downstairs and his car is definitely a sports care. A McLaren, you think. One of the places you catered for ages ago was full of rich people with flashy cars and you remembered some of them.

He sits with you uncomfortably close in the back seat but doesn't speak to you at all during the ride. Not until you arrive at the destination, which is a giant building where the strange man certainly lives.

The driver (named Ichiji) calls the strange man Gojo-sama, which makes you feel extremely on edge. They whisper about something when you're out of ear shot, and Ichiji gives you a sorrowful look that you can't place.

The name Gojo is familiar to you, but you aren't sure where you've heard it.

After taking a long elevator ride to one of the upper floors, you end up in the strange mans condo. When you get there, he tells you take off your shoes and gives you nice slippers.

"Welcome to my humble abode," He says, still frivolous and speaking to you in what feels like a foreign tongue. "And also yours. I'll set you up in the guest room later, but you'll be keeping my bed warm mostly so keep that in mind."

The size of the place is absurd and so is the decor. What have you gotten yourself into? You must've gone insane. You're too afraid to touch anything.

"Am I like... a sex slave?" You ask curiously.

He frowns at you. "You make me sound like some kind of rapist. I guess now that I own you....it might make me one... but you agreed to come here so don't be like that!!" He huffs, childishly.

His response is somewhat incomprehensible to you. He's stranger by the minute and completely tactless - but for some reason, it's hard to distrust him. He doesn't raise any immediate red flags aside from being unusual.

You almost want to say it wouldn't matter if he was, as long as he pays you but decide not too.

"Okay. Do you want me to take my clothes off?" You reply, nonchalant. He stares at you.

"...I know your heads pretty fucked up, but don't you think you're being too blase about all this?"

Your brow furrows. A weird response for a guy who willingly understands this is a less than ethical situation "Would... you prefer I struggle and refuse you? Is that your fetish?"

"No! Well..." You look at him flatly as he thinks on it, almost blushing at the thought. You make a face of disgust "Not in this case, alright! It's just too pitiful and I'm not that type really.... Be more cautious."

"But you were planning to fuck me from the start, right? Or something."

He nods. "Well, yes. As a way to earn your living and for me get my urges out whenever. Finding people to have sex with is a hassle."

You shrug.

"Right. I can cook and clean too. I've done pretty much every job you can think of it,"

He waves a hand at you. "We can discuss it later." He puts a hand in his necktie and pulls on with a small smile. "Right now, I want to test out my new toy so..."

You should feel more disgusted by how he refers to you, but you don't have it in yourself.

"Can I shower first?"

He looks surprised but nods. "Uh-huh. Just wear one of my shirts when you come out. Everything else is in the bathroom. It's upstairs, first door on your left."

You stand to your feet, nodding.

It takes you ten minutes to figure out how the shower works.

His shower is nice. The whole place is nice. Nicer than any shithole you've ever lived in. He has a lot of nice bath products, though you aren't sure how you feel about smelling like him since you're borrowing his.

You examine your body a bit in the shower, looking at old scars as you wash and rub yourself clean. Thankfully, you gave yourself a trim downstairs not long ago.

It's embarrassing in retrospect but you've not had much of a choice in the first place. You're sensitive, unsure of the last time you've touched yourself given how much you work. You think of your job and feel guilty for how you're going to miss it. But you recall that you were preparing to die not even two hours ago and feel less bad.

You whimper a little as you finger yourself open under the water - getting wet easier than you thought. You have to lean against the wall, but with enough coaxing you get three fingers in. You're still horny when you shut the water off and step out.

You dry yourself and put on lotion - staring in the mirror. As told you borrow one of his shirts, but it's too big on you and you can see your nipples too clearly which makes you embarrassed.

You reason you're about to go fuck a stranger anyway, and decide to step out right after.

You decide against wearing underwear since his shirt fits on you like a dress, but regret when you come back down stairs feeling aware of the breeze on your went cunt.

He's sitting on the couch with his legs spread, dress shirt unbuttoned but still in his clothes. He hears you before he sees you, eyes widening. You suddenly get self-conscious under the weight of his stare.

"Better than I thought," Is his only assessment. Your skin grows hot.

He beckons you over to him and you go, unsure of what to do until he pulls you into his lap. Forcing you to straddle him, he wastes no time in feeling you up. His hands at your waist and chest. His face lights up in pure amusement when he sees you bare underneath.

He stares at your pussy for a long time.

"It's good," He hums, his hands brushing against it. Your nipples pebble in response to the arousal, a pathetic moan leaving your lips that makes him laugh. "Pretty."

You don't have anything to say to that so you keep quiet. Gojo slides his fingers along the seam of your cunt to asses your wetness, surprised surely by how wet it is. Without warning, he plunges a finger in. He looks up at your face, your hand covering your mouth so you don't moan.

"So wet," His voice can't contain his amusement. "What's this?"

"I was," You shiver half-way through as he plunges in another finger and it goes in smoothly. "I p-prepared in the shower and masturbated. I thought you'd just want to stick it in and I didn't want it to hurt.

"Haah," His voice is sharp, suddenly breathy. Something hard and big presses up against your leg. "You're talented in seducing me. I'm not so ungentlemanly, but I'll let it go this time, alright?"

You nod. He uses a sticky hand to unbutton his slacks and push his boxers away. You gasp at the size of his cock. You're not a virgin exactly, but you haven't had sex with anyone this big ever. He chuckles a little, pressing the head of his cock against your stomach and cunt as if measuring it up to you.

More wetness pulses, shame filling you - because you're almost excited to be fucking this strange man you've only met today. Weirdly, you don't feel unsafe around him. Your eyes glass over from lust.

He sticks his fingers in your mouth and you suck automatically, instinctively. His smile is predatory all of a sudden, teeth glimmering.

"So obedient," He says, sharply. "Ah, I have a good eye. It really would've been such a waste."

You're content to throw yourself at him, chasing the pleasure. His fingers taste of salt and skin, making you want something else entirely. It's not long before he pulls away though, wrapping his hand around his shaft and making it shiny. You blink down at where he fists his cock - your spine tingling at the sight.

"Look at you," He mutters, amused. "Do you always get this excited? Is it normal for you to fuck strange men or am I special?"

You shake your head. "It's only been two people."

"Then I am special," He replies. Your breath hitches at the feeling of his cock pressing against your hole - fluttering. "We have good compatibility."

Before you can say a word, you feel his length push inside of you in one swift motion and gasp. It's so big, so impossibly big - and even with how much you stretched, there's a touch of resistance that's making your entire lower half feel like it's jelly. Almost numb from the sensation. Buzzing from adrenaline and want.

You feel full. In your stomach, in your chest - your whole body feel complete. When you manage to open your eyes, you look at Gojo and find yourself taken aback. His hair is pushed back from his hand and he looks... different. He's handsome now that you realize. His face looks...pleased.

You talk before you can think about it.

"Do I feel good?"

He laughs sweetly, before pressing a kiss to your temple that feels to affectionate for people who barely know each other.

"Uh-huh," He says. His hands are strong, tight on your ass as he bucks up into you - causing you to collapse forward. The pleasure makes you shake, sensitivity through the roof. "Feel so good. Hahaha, how lucky."

You cling onto Gojo's shoulder and bury your face into his neck. He doesn't stop you. A large hand comes around the back of your head - the other one at your hips as he thrusts up into you with alarming force and precision. He feels so good it's a little scary, and you can't keep the noises from slipping out. You moan and whine each time the tip rubs against you inside, soft walls barely able to accommodate the size.

Your body feels hot everywhere he touches. It's been so long and Gojo is so careful but so intense. His expensive dress shirt rubs up against your nipples each time he moves. It's so good, so good - makes you want to cry.

"You're so sensitive." He laughs against your shoulder. "Gripping so tight every time I move. Do you want to cum so bad?"

"Yes," The words are a sob. Just a little more.

"Uh-huh. Tell me where to touch you. How should I make you cum."

You're too shamelessly pent up to feel shy anymore. "Touch my c-clit, please, please."

"Got it, got it - don't cry."

Gojo listens to you well. Thick fingers and an angled hand find your clit with ease as he bounces you on his cock with no regard. Your eyes roll back instantly, immediately - as an orgasm washes over your entire body. Back arching, you cum hard around the base of his cock - but Gojo just keeps fucking you through it. He doesn't stop even when you come down, only moves you both so you're laying on the couch on your back.

He kisses you then, and you meet his mouth with sloppy tears running down your face from the pleasure.

"Let's see what your stamina is like, yeah? See if you can keep up with me."

He fucks you unconscious.

Essentially. Though you take with enthusiasm even during your exhaustion because the sex is phenomenal - you have no idea when you stop.

You wake up in a bed, and you wake up completely clean. You don't know whose bed, but there's a large figure besides you. Half-asleep and fully exhausted, you feel shy thinking about the fact he probably bathed and dressed you while you were out.

What a strange man, you think - to do that.

He's talking to someone on the phone. You don't really make out much of the words, though you do hear your name in bits and pieces.

"...A college student.......- young then -...... open a bank account for.... - debt...- pay it all off before it becomes annoying.... look into -."

You shift under your blankets half asleep. A hand comes up on top of your head on the pillow, pushing hair from your face.

"Did I wake you?" His expression is hard to read in the dark with your eyes barely open. "Sorry. Almost done. Go back to sleep."

So you do, because you can't find strength to do much else.

The bed is warm, but your sure the heat you feel is from the strong, gentle head petting your head as you rest.

#ask to tag #dark content cw #suicide mention #writing tag #gojo x reader #gojo smut #jjk x reader #jjk smut #inspired by every poor uke in bls ive read for the last few months

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magicalqueennightmare · 3 months ago

Text

Nothing Will Change

(Again a Takeshi gif cause Rick ones are in short demand)

Rick Flag X Meta!Marine Reader

What starts off as a friends with benefits situation between you and Rick becomes so much more

Violence, cursing, sexual situations

"Insubordinate" "Overbearing"

"You disobeyed a direct order!" "Yeah because it was a stupid fuckin order!"

You and Rick stood in the center of the plane, glaring at each other as you argued while the remaining members of the team watched in amusement. He crossed his arms over his chest and you purposely mimicked his posture, hearing Harley bite back a giggle. "I'm your superior officer and over this team!" "Well good for you! I'm the mother fucker that got us out of there and back on this damn plane!" "You took a stupid risk, corporal!" you bristled at him at pulling rank . "Fuck you Flag! What you call stupid I call worth it. It got done, didn't it?"

Contrary to how it would seem to a bystander you and Rick were actually damn good friends off the clock. He was a fucking sweetheart under that tough exterior and you trusted him with your life. You really did work well together just sometimes you butted heads on missions and he wanted to treat you like he did the squad which meant he expected to bitch you out with little to no push back. You turned to head towards the back of the plane, planning to sit right near the drop doors so you'd be first off. "Easy marine" he muttered and you spun on your heel.

"You may outrank me Colonel but don't think for a minute I am your subordinate on this fucking team" you waved a hand around the plane where Blackguard, Harley, Mongal and about a half dozen other residents of Belle Reeve sat "They answer to me as much as they answer to you, most of them answer faster to me than to you" you covered the few steps between the two of you to be standing right in front of him, never mind that you had to look up to meet his eyes "I respect you Rick, I really do but sometimes you're simply a fuckin asshole"

A beat of silence fell before one by one the squad started hooping and hollering knowing Rick would never tac more time onto them for something so trivial despite the glare he shot their way as you raised an eyebrow and lifted your arms out "See Colonel? You may outrank me but it appears they prefer the corporal"

"Fuck Rick" you gasped, clutching to his shoulders as his hips snapped up into yours, driving himself deeper inside of you with every roll of his hips. Your fingernails dug into his flesh, head dropping over onto his neck as light sobs of his name mixed with praises and curses fell from you.

Your thighs tightened around his waist, one hand moving to brace yourself on the headboard behind him as another orgasm slammed into you. He didn't slow down, didn't give you time to adjust before he was pulling you tight to him and turning the two of you so his weight was pining you to the mattress, he hiked your left leg up further around his waist to give him a new angle as his fingers found your clit, intent on wringing another orgasm out of your already spent form.

"I can't Rick. Fuck, I can't" you pratically sobbed. He slowed his thrusts slightly, hand stilling but fingers staying in place as he leaned down to catch your lips in a kiss that was so damn gentle compared to how hard he was fucking you it made your head spin. He licked into your mouth almost playfully then moved to kiss down your jaw and to your neck before biting the soft flesh there "You can't take anymore baby?" you shook your head weakly and he laughed "But where's my little smartmouthed marine?" "Rick please" you moaned when he rolled his hips deeper into yours. "Where is she, sweetheart? The one who couldn't listen to orders? The one who loves calling me an asshole?"

When you didn't respond he slammed his hips roughly into yours, accentuating every word with a snap of his hips "Where's.that.marine?" you felt your eyes roll back in your head as another orgasm started to build and Rick chuckled darkly "Well I'm be damned honey looks like you had another one in you after all"

When his fingers curled against your clit again the orgasm slammed into you fully causing your legs to lock around his waist and your walls to squeeze down on his cock. "God damn darlin" he growled, forehead pressed to your chest as he chased his own release. You felt his lips connect to your skin, sucking dark marks on your flesh just below where your clothes would fall so no one would see. Your nails dug into his back as he moved up to kiss you "Feel so fuckin good baby. You've been so good for me" he praised and you felt your walls clench around him. His eyes fluttered shut, a smirk forming on his lips "You like that sweetheart? Like hearing you're my good girl?"

You could feel his thrusts start to falter and knew he was so damn close. You hadn't even felt another orgasm building so it took you by surprise when his teeth grazed your earlobe right as you fell over that edge. "Fuck, squeezin the hell out of me baby" he growled before burying himself inside of you with one final thrust. You felt when he came, thick spurts of cum coating your walls and dripping out of your overworked cunt.

--------------------

The only sound that filled the room was both of you working to get your breathing back to normal and the light kisses he was leaving across whatever patch of your skin he could reach. "Guess you were a little more pissed at me than you said?" you teased, running your fingers through his sweaty hair and down his broad back, tracing scars and the marks from your nails.

He lifted his head to look at you and you could see the worry in his eyes "Did I hurt you?" you shook your head "No Rick but tell me the truth" he kissed the base of your throat and you knew he felt you swallow hard at the action "You could've gotten yourself killed" "We're called the suicide squad. Kind of our thing, isn't it?" you joked and was rewarded with those hazel eyes full of fire glaring up at you "Very fuckin funny. Next time just listen to me. I hate arguing with you and pulling rank" "Especially when you lose?" you joked and he dipped his head down to bite down on your breast just hard enough you gasped. "Dammit Flag!" He gave you a broad grin "You behave and I'll behave"

You shook your head "I promise that as long as your orders doesn't mean I have to stand on the sidelines and see a mission go sideways for no good reason besides I may get killed I'll listen to them" he dropped his head back down to your chest "You're fuckin killing me. Your legs feel like showering yet?" you nudged at his chest "If a big asshole would get off me" he lifted his head and gave you a smile that made your heart flip "You weren't complaining a few minutes ago about me being on top of you"

--------------------

This thing between you and Rick had started as a way to blow off steam. Neither of you had energy or time to date and definitely not to keep up pretenses of a relationship outside of work. He was someone you trusted to not hurt you plus the added benefit that you knew each other was clean of diseases and he couldn't get you pregnant from documented precautions you'd taken.

It was enjoyable, Rick was fucking amazing in bed. You'd never had anyone like him before who actually seemed to draw as much, if not more pleasure from giving than receiving. You spent most of your time together anyways so the friends with benefits idea was easy to wrap your head around after a conversation that set ground rules.

If either of you found someone you wanted to pursue it was over. If you stayed overnight whoever's house it wasn't slept on the couch. You didn't let it bleed into your work relationship or your friendship because you were too important to each other. You were honest with each other and most importantly and the one you were having a harder and harder time with looking in the eye was if you started to catch feelings you needed to tell the other person.

You couldn't tell Rick you were starting to feel more for him than the friend that you had mind blowing sex with for numerous reasons. Hell he didn't know the biggest secret you carried and you could only imagine the betrayal in those hazel eyes you loved so much when the day came that he found out.

You'd hold your heart close at hand so when that day came the crush would maybe be a little cushioned or so you hoped.

---------------------

You were half asleep when you heard your bedroom door creak open and rolled over to see Rick leaning against the doorframe with a grin "Mornin" "Mornin" you repeated with a smile. He held up a coffee mug in his hand so you held your arm out which caused him to laugh "So damn independent until she just woke up and she wants coffee" he walked over to the bed and waited until you'd pushed yourself up into a seated position to hand you the mug. You took a tentative sip and damn near moaned, Rick always made the best coffee.

He raised an eyebrow before a smirk slipped onto his face "I haven't even touched you this morning but I'll take the compliment" you rolled your eyes and stared at him over the brim of the mug "If you're waking me up, Waller called you and will be calling me.." before you could finish the sentence your phone started chiming. You cut your eyes at Rick and he nodded, mimicking locking his lips before sitting down on the edge of the bed while you answered the call.

You answered the phone on the second ring "There's a briefing at ten. I already spoke to Colonel Flag. I expect both of you to be in attendance, Corporal, understood?" "Yes ma'am" You replied then the phone went dead in your hand. You rolled your eyes "She's always such a fuckin peach"

Rick laughed and leaned over to place a gentle kiss right over your pulse "I gotta get going. I don't wanna roll in with the same clothes I left in. I'll see you there?" You nodded "See you there. Thanks for the coffee" "Anytime sweetheart. Anytime" he replied before standing up and walking out of your bedroom.

You sat there and listened to his footsteps as he grabbed his jacket and slipped his boots on then walked out your door, smiling to yourself when you heard him lock the handle lock before shutting it behind himself. You let out a deep breath then kicked your blanket off. Best not to keep Waller waiting. She was a bitch on a good day, let alone when she'd gotten impatient.

----------------------

When you pulled into your parking spot Rick stood with a shoulder leaned against his truck waiting on you to park your jeep. While the two of you made sure to never come into work together you always seemed to unconsciously wait on the other to actually walk into the building.

Once you'd shut your door and started walking towards him he pushed off his truck and took a step towards you "So, any idea on what we're walking into?" you asked and he shrugged "With Waller? You and me both know there's no telling" a laugh fell from your lips because there had never been a truer sentence spoken.

You fell in step next to him as you headed towards the front entrance. Whatever it was, you could handle it, right?

---------------------

You and Rick shared an office, it made sense considering you were at ARGUS very little and what time you were there it was either reporting to Waller or doing paperwork. Of course it was a little crowded with two desks shoved into it but it was better than either of you having to share space with anyone else or having to have a desk out in the bullpen with Waller's office flunkies.

The two of you managed to make it into the office, sit down your belongings and sign into your computers before Waller's secretary Christina knocked on the door "Colonel Flag? Corporal Y/L/N? Miss Waller wants to see the two of you in her office" you opened the door and smiled at her "Christina, We've both told you to just call us Rick and Y/N. You don't have to use ranks or our last names" she smiled "Yes ma'am." before scurrying away

You glanced over your shoulder at Rick "How the hell is she working here again?" he shrugged "No clue on that one sweetheart?" you narrowed your eyes and his own widened "Sorry Y/N" you shook your head but laughed "You southern men" he held the door open with one hand so you could walk open, a smirk slipping onto his face when you barely had to duck "Let's go see if we're in trouble"

Waller's office was at the far end of the building, away from everyone else's. Normally the door would be closed along with the blinds being drawn but Christina must have told her she was successful in summoning the two of you because the door stood open and you could hear Waller's voice along with another woman's. Rick must have clocked the other voice as well because he glanced down at you with a questioning look. You shrugged but continued walking, letting him take the lead since that's what Waller would expect.

When Rick knocked at the open door her voice drifted out "Come in" you followed Rick into the door, clocking another woman standing with Waller. She was probably around your age, long honey brown hair that was done up in a pretty updo with light makeup and the bluest eyes you'd ever seen.

Her pantsuit looked freshly freshed and more than likely tailored to her. She smiled broadly when she saw the two of you, even when you both unintentionally fell into standing at attention until Waller gave an almost imperceivable nod. Once you and Rick eased your posture Amanda introduced you both in turn before waving a hand towards the woman "This is Kristin Jameson. She's a leading scientist in meta and mutation studies"

You felt your heart stutter when Waller's eyes flickered towards you, only Rick's voice saying "Pleasure to meet you ma'am" keeping you grounded enough to manage "Nice to meet you ma'am" she smiled "Miss Waller has assured me Belle Reeve and ARGUS has a lot to offer to my studies and my upcoming lecture in DC" You could see the amusement in Amanda's eyes when you swallowed hard as Rick asked "She studying prisoners?"

"Among others" Waller replied and you nodded sharply before she said "The two of you are to assist her in any way she needs as you have working relationships with a lot of Belle Reeve" "Yes ma'am" you spoke first, managing to keep your voice steady as you spoke, hoping like hell Rick wouldn't notice anything was off and quickly felt your heart fall when you realized his eyes were firmly on Kristin "You're dismissed for now. I'll let you know when she needs an escort or assistance"

You nodded and turned to walk out, hearing Kristin say it was nice to meet you both and Rick returning the sentiment. You couldn't be bothered to worry about it.You had to ignore the aching feeling in your chest at noticing how Rick's attention had been on her because of how Waller had been looking at you. Damn her. She'd do anything to prove she had the best tools at her disposal no matter who got hurt.

Rick caught up with you before you could get all the way back to your shared office which given how much longer his legs were there really wasn't a surprise there. "What do you think that's about?" he asked, watching you as you walked straight to your jacket and slipped it on despite having been warm just moments before. "Don't know" you spoke more to yourself than to him.

He nodded towards your jacket "You good? I can turn the heat up?" you shook your head as you sat down in front of your computer. You had two stacks worth of paperwork to go through and your stacks were small compared to Rick's. "And heat you to death? No, I'll warm up in a few" you replied and he nodded slowly, a lazy smirk working its way onto his face "Unless you want body heat to warm you?" you cut your eyes up "I'll shoot you" and was rewarded with one of his laughs that made your entire body warm. You loved when he genuinely laughed, especially when considering most of the time only you were allowed to hear it. It felt like a part of him reserved only for you. "Just sayin" he shrugged.

So far Kristin had been around for a couple weeks and she'd yet to approach you about anything other than escorts to the prison. Maybe it wouldn't be that bad. Maybe you could get through this with your head and heart intact. You walked around a corner after delivering a stack of finished work to Christina and felt like you'd been dipped in ice water when you heard that same sound that normally warmed you to the core, Rick's laughter. This time it wasn't at your teasing or Boomer busting his ass falling off the ramp of a plane, no he was standing next to the coffee pot talking to Kristin. He was turned facing her and the way she was looking up at him made your stomach churn.

Why hadn't you seen it before? June. The one person Rick had let claim his heart. Genius, gorgeous and the exact same type of woman as Kristin Jameson. You'd been so concerned about her for other reasons you hadn't realized she was perfect for Rick but from looking at how they interacted there was a good chance they may have started to figure it out for themselves and that thought made you want to vomit. Fuck, you fucked up. If Rick got with Kristin, you'd have to be happy for him but you'd never be able to look him in the eyes again because he knew you too well. He'd know something was wrong and then you'd lose him for good.

You hadn't realized your attention had been so focused on them until you slammed into Anderson headed to the copy machine and papers went everywhere.

"Shit Anderson! I'm so sorry!" you muttered, crouching to help him collect the papers. He smiled at you "No problem but are you ok? I've never seen you so distracted besides that time Harley caught those squirrels and let em loose in Belle Reeve and you had to help catch em" you laughed at the memory of that chaos "Yeah, no I'm good. Maybe I'm going a little stir crazy? too much calm?" he shook his head "My dad always said marines were a different breed" you raised an eyebrow "Wasn't your dad a marine?" he nodded "Yeah" you laughed and handed him the papers you picked up "Sorry about that again. I'll watch where i'm going"

You hadn't noticed your little debacle had earned Rick's attention because when you straightened up Kristin was gone and Rick was watching you. "You ok?" he mouthed and you nodded "Perfect" before turning on your heel, where you were going you weren't sure considering your office was a shared space but you needed to catch your breath without being within touching distance of Rick.

"You doing anything tonight?" Rick asked, perched on the edge of your desk. You barely glanced up from looking over the team list for the upcoming mission "Sleeping?" he reached for the file in your hand and took it before you could snatch it back. When you cut your eyes up at him the smile he gave you made your heart flip, god why had you ever thought you wouldn't fall for a man like Flag? The tact pants he wore hugged his thighs and legs beautifully and that damn black t shirt clung to his biceps and shoulders in a way that very well would've had any woman drooling and you were not exempt. When he realized he had your attention on him he laughed "She does still have eyes! Been so long since I saw em I was startin to worry darlin" you rolled your eyes and held your hand out "Can I have that back Rick?"

He shook his head "Only when you tell me what I did to piss you off" you ran a hand across your face "Nothing Rick. It's just been a lot with babysittin the scientist, finding out we have an upcoming mission and oh yeah if we don't die on that mission we have to go play Waller's good little pets in D.C. nothing I love more than that" he nodded slowly "Then come over or let me come over. I miss spending time with you"

You raised an eyebrow and saw a blush color his cheeks which considering the things the two of you had done, was short of comical "Not like that Y/N! Well I mean I wouldn't tell you no but I mean just spending time together, movie or dinner something like that. Catch our breath and talk without it being around files or team lists" oh boy this was it. Him telling you he wanted to pursue Kristin. Fuck, how were you gonna get out of this? "Maybe after the mission?" you offered and saw the way his shoulders dropped "The mission is still three days away"

You nodded "We need to prep. Make sure we're as ready as we can be cause god knows Amanda isn't ever gonna tell us everything we need to know" he studied you for a second before finally saying "We promised to be honest with each other when we first became friends. I can tell when you're lying to me but I'm gonna pretend I can't and say ok sweetheart because that's what you want me to say. Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know I'm not gonna judge you and I'm always gonna have your back" "I know Rick and I will, I promise. This mission and everything just has my head a little crooked" he pushed himself up off your desk, standing to his full height before leaning over to place a kiss right under your right ear "I'll be here waiting to help you get it back straight whenever you'll let me" then passed you the file back before walking over to his own desk.

You looked up at him and he smiled before turning to his own work. You just had to get through this, right?

Getting through it was easier said than done as it seemed. You were used to missions going a certain way or well what happened before missions. The suiting up, the debrief and the roll out to collect your team.

You hadn't expected Kristin to still be at ARGUS. You hadn't known Waller had given her a desk or well maybe you had and buried the information but when you spotted her when you walked out of the debriefing you forced a smile onto your face. You were a lot of things but rude for no reason was not one of them.

You gave her a small nod and headed for transport telling Rick over your shoulder you'd meet him at the air strip. You looked back in just enough time to see her and him talking and felt your heart drop when he leaned down to say something in her ear. A mission was good. You could focus on something besides your heart breaking.

You slammed into the door leading outside and bit your cheek when the cold wind slammed into your face. Fuck, you'd forgot your jacket. No way were you going back inside. Maybe there would be an extra one in the squad's gear. You rubbed your hands across your arms and headed for the truck waiting to take you to pick up the team.

---------------------

You stepped out of the transport truck and locked the door into place so everyone could file out. Luckily it was the usual suspects so no one needed to hear the rundown about the implants in their necks or how much time they'd get off their sentences.

No one had an extra jacket and you hadn't wanted to take Boomers bomber jacket or Harley's cropped leather one that they'd offered off their own back so you stood with your arms tightly crossed while they one by one unloaded from the truck then headed for the plane where Rick stood talking to the pilot.

You hadn't looked his way since you stepped out of the truck. You were being childish. You'd known this day was coming. Rick Flag was a good man, anyone could see that. You couldn't hold it against Kristin even if you wanted nothing more than to.

Once the last member of the squad was off the truck and walking up the ramp of the plane you closed the door and slapped it "We're good!" The truck rumbled away so you took a deep breath before following the team.

--------------------

You tried to walk past Rick considering the pilot had even headed on-board to start the takeoff process but his hand shot out and wrapped around your right bicep.You cut your eyes at him and saw he was holding your jacket out with his other hand "You forgot this"

"Thanks" it was barely a mutter but you got it out. You took the jacket from him and he dropped your arm to allow you to slip it on. You could feel your arms start to thaw slightly as soon as the jacket was covering them. He nodded and looked up towards the plane then down towards his boots "Now's not the time. I know it but what is going on with us? We aren't ever this out of sync"

You shrugged one shoulder "We're good Flag. Don't worry, please" you didn't want his focus to be split when you knew bullets would be flying in no time. He held your gaze and took a step closer, effectively eliminating what little distance had remained between the two of you and using his height over you to his advantage. His voice was deeper than usual when he spoke, his accent bleeding out "That right there is how I know we're not. Outside of joking you ain't called me Flag when we've been alone in years now"

You swallowed hard, ignoring how his voice made your entire body feel like a flame was licking across it. It was going to be hard to get over him. You raised your eyes to fully meet his and saw a bit of a smile threaten his face before it quickly fell when you asked "Did ya tell Kristin bye?" You saw the confusion spread across his face and used the opening to slip past him onto the plane.

------------------------

"WHEELS UP IN FIVE" You hollered to the pilot as you took your seat next to Harley. "Yes ma'am" the pilot replied as Rick finally walked up the ramp and sat down across the walkway from you, his eyes drilling into you but you refused to look at him. You had to focus on this mission.

Harley bumped your boot with her own and you looked at her "Where'd ya find ya jacket?" You nodded towards Rick "Our fearless leader brought it to me" you could see the muscles in his jaw clench at your words. You never referred to him as team leader because you ran the squad together but Waller had introduced him as leader to Kristin.

"Awe that was sweet of ya Flag" she laughed and he nodded, eyes never leaving you "I'm less of an asshole than given credit for" You didn't want to be the first to break eye contact but knew you had to. The squad would get restless if you and Rick were arguing before takeoff. When you let your eyes drift to Harley she struck up a conversation about getting you a jacket to match her own. You half heartedly listened because while normally you actually did enjoy her company your attention was currently on the set of eyes you could still feel on you. Yeah this was going to be a long mission.

-----------------------

You were pinned down with Harley and two bodies of fallen squad members. This shitty mission had gone from bad to worse. "Corporal, report!" Waller's voice echoed through the com in your ear. You met Harley's eyes, both of your chests heaving with every breath "Sorry, kinda busy right now. Check on Colonel Flag and I'll report soon if I'm not dead" You clicked the button on your com so you could hear chatter but they couldn't hear you. A bullet whizzed right past Harley's ear causing you both to flinch. You eyed the doorway that was separating you from getting the hell out of this. The only problem? Someone had to get it open. Easier said than done when every time these assholes even thought they saw either of you they started shooting.

"Toots, you know I love ya but I think we may be screwed" you huffed out a breath, forming a plan that was really really bad but the only option you had. You dug the two computer drives out of the pocket of your pants and held them out to Harley "Keep these in one piece and when I say go, get that damn door open. That is your only focus, not me, not bullets. Understood?" She tucked the computer drives away but looked confused "How are you gonna block em?" You gave her a tight lipped smile "Just trust me Harls and if we get outta this I'll make sure this one is twenty off"

She nodded and slid to the edge of the half fallen wall you'd taken shelter behind. You checked the automatic rifle in your hands, along with the two 9mm you carried. All you had to do was buy her twenty seconds tops. "Now" you breathed, stepping out to draw their fire.

You heard Harley's boots hitting the floor as she ran and the sound of the chain on the door giving way but couldn't turn your attention from the hail of bullets. You thought you were clear and had gotten lucky. Three were down, two had been called back to pursue Rick's half of the team. You made the mistake of glancing back to ensure your footing was clear and felt a bullet tear through your right side, just above your hip.

Harley screamed your name as you stumbled, hand clutching your side but you shook your head "Dammit move Quinn!" her eyes went wide when she saw how much blood was gushing from between your fingers. "Flag's gonna kill me" "Flag will be fine" you told her from between gritted teeth. You needed to get somewhere secure to dig into your med kit but with Harley here, there was no way she wouldn't want to help. "Just help me move, please" you begged and she moved to your left side, throwing your arm over her shoulder.

The two of you ran sloppily through the halls, clearing the corners as best as you could until you came to what appeared to be a janitor's closet. "This'll work" "Work for what? You're gonna bleed to death!" she nearly squealed and you shook your head, feeling dizzy from the movement and blood you'd lost "No I wont. I just need you to trust me and to know I can trust you" "You can trust me" she helped you into the closet and down into a sitting position.

You fumbled twice for your med kit before her hands covered yours "Tell me what to do" you leaned back against the wall, closing your eyes against a rush of pain "We need bandages, forceps to dig out the bullet and a few of the pyro packs that are in there" "pyro packs?" she asked and your eyes flew open to glare at her "Ok ok" she dug out the metallic bags that read "Caution. Burn Risk" and looked them over "What now?" you swallowed twice "Open them up" she did as you asked, being careful to not let the material touch her skin before looking up at you. You smiled "Now's time to dig the bullet out" she shook her head "How about I go find Flag! Or we call him over the coms? That man would fight this whole place to get to you"

You shook your head "No time. You're who's here" she nodded and grabbed the forceps. You managed a smile "It's gonna hurt me but you're not. Dig in,find the bullet and snatch it out. The moment the bullet comes out, put the entire contents of both bags directly into the wound. Don't question it. Then bandage it up" She swallowed loudly then nodded "Fuck, I wish someone was here to hold your hand" you laughed "I got it Harley. Just do it" you leaned your head back and closed your eyes as you felt the cold forceps touch the edges of the wound followed by the excruciating pain of Harley trying to secure the bullet "You got it" you breathed and she pulled it out.

You heard the metallic twang of it hitting the floor before she poured the heat pack into it. You let out a breath at the familiar warmth flooding your system. Your entire body relaxed into itself as that gene inherited from your grandmother kicked in. You could feel the muscles and flesh that had been shredded by the bullet begin to knit themselves back together as Harley taped a gauze over the wound that had already stopped bleeding. Her eyes widened at the lack of blood "Wanna tell me what that was?" you shook your head "And Rick doesn't find out I got shot" she held your gaze and a silent understanding passed. You smiled weakly "Give me a few breaths then I'll be able to get on my feet. Blood loss is a bitch" "Even to someone like you?" Harley guessed quietly and you nodded "Yeah, even to someone like me"

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By the time you were able to get your feet under you Rick was screaming across the coms "GOD DAMMIT Y/N. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?" Harley winked at you and hit her com "Easy Flaggy. We got a little pinned down. We lost the two new kids" "Fuck. Are you two ok?" you hit your com "We're good Rick. Retrieved what we came for. See you at evac?" he took a deep breath after you spoke and his voice was a bit more gentle when he said "Yeah. See you at evac"

When you and Harley burst out the building you made a run for the chopper where Flag stood outside of. He smiled slightly when he saw the two of you then his eyes trailed down to the blood soaking you and it quickly dropped. You stopped to let Harley get on board and he snatched you close enough you could hear him over the rotors "What happened to you not being hurt?" you glanced down and shrugged "Who said this is my blood? Now light this bitch up and let's go home"

You squeezed into the chopper between Rick and the pilot, watching as the building beneath you all burnt to ash once you were high enough to detonate. You could feel sleep tugging at you, a side effect of healing a wound that would've killed any other human but you couldn't sleep yet. You still had to get to the plane home. You felt your eyelids flutter but shook your head to resist and knew Rick noticed when he moved close enough his shoulder was right in place with your head that all you had to do was barely lean over to be resting against it.

You wanted to resist but fuck you were tired and he was so warm, your body craved the extra heat to help replace the blood loss faster..before you knew it he was waking you up to move from the chopper to the plane and once again on the plane you let yourself fall asleep against him again...if he was ending the intimacy between the two of you once you made it home you could enjoy it now plus the added bonus that you would have replinished the lost blood and not be weak for the debrief with Waller.

Harley curled up to your back like a cat and for once you didn't try to stop her, whether she knew you needed to raise your core temp or she was just tired you didn't care. It was a cocoon of warmth that lulled your aching body to sleep.

----------------------

You followed Rick through the halls toward Waller's office. While he'd been signing everyone back in at Belle Reeve you'd managed to change your shirt at least, fuck your dry cleaner got half your salary at this point. He kept eyeing the blood that stained your pants and you hoped he hadn't figured out from the spill pattern that it had indeed come from you. The bandage itched like crazy which meant the skin was mended or almost. You had luckily found a dark enough colored shirt no one could tell the bandage was there.

Once you walked through the bullpen you were glad to see Kristin at least wasn't there. You weren't sure if you could keep up being polite. You followed Rick into Waller's office and stood back while he went through the basics of the missions and handed over the computer drives and other files that had been recovered. She listened, stoic as always then dismissed the both of you.

You walked slowly behind Rick, fighting the urge to scratch at your side. You knew he would probably hold you to the whole getting together after the mission like you promised, but you hoped he'd let you off the hook for the time being. When the two of you hit the parking lot before you ever had a chance to shiver his jacket was draped across your shoulders. You looked back at him and he shrugged "Yours was soaked in blood Darlin" you felt your heart flip at how gentle his voice was. "Rick, I don't want to talk tonight, please"

You headed for your jeep but before you could get the door open he caught your arm and spun you around so your back was to the side of the jeep and he was as close as he could get without invading your personal space, one hand resting just over your head on the jeep and the other hovering above your hip "No, I think we need to talk. Your choice whether it's here or your place" you swallowed hard at the warmth radiating off of him. How the fuck did this man smell so damn good after a mission like that? You wanted to bury yourself in him. "My place" you finally said after a moment and he smiled before leaning down to let his lips brush against your neck "Good girl" you shivered lightly before shoving against his chest "Go get your truck! We both need a shower!" he groaned "Damn, I can't shower with you after missions. You try to fuckin cook me" "Cry baby" you teased before gently shoving him again "Now go, I'll meet you there"

-----------------------

You stood under the stream of the shower watching the pink tinged water spin down the drain. Damn, you'd had more blood on you than you'd thought. After washing your hair and body, your fingers found the new scar decorating your side. If it was on anyone else and you were asked how old the scar was you would say at least a couple weeks, old enough that the skin wasn't still soft and sensitive but still new enough it was a light pink color. Maybe it was better that Rick was ending things, at least you wouldn't have to explain weird scars anymore. If he touched you like this there's no way he wouldn't notice the scar and you weren't sure you could play it off as him just having never noticed it.

You heard a knock at your door and knew it was Rick. You sighed and turned the water off before grabbing your robe. You'd let him in then get dressed. If he insisted on having this conversation tonight he could very damn well wait in your living room while you got dressed.

When you unlocked the door and swung it open his eyes trailed down your body and a look passed over his face that made a different kind of heat roll through you. No, you weren't going there. "Well damn sweetheart, I'm overdressed" he teased and you rolled your eyes, running the towel in your hand over your hair "Very funny. I just got out of the shower. I was caked in blood" he nodded "Yeah, that's what took me so long to get here" he leaned down as if to kiss you but you side stepped. At his confused expression you pointed towards your bedroom "I'm gonna go get some clothes on. Want to pour some of that whiskey Simon sent me for my birthday?"

If you were having your heart ripped out you needed something strong to keep up a front and god bless your sergeant he always sent you a bottle of the good shit every year. Rick nodded and headed for your kitchen while you made a beeline for your room. You could hear him opening cabinets but focused on finding comfortable clothes. After a while you decided on a tank and sleep shorts. The tank was tight enough no bra was required. After running a brush through your hair you took a final look in the mirror then took a step into the living room. Rick looked up from where he'd been leaning against your kitchen counter apparently watching your bedroom door. He'd kicked his shoes off and his jacket was across the back of your couch. The way he looked at you made your skin flush, you had to reel it in. He was too important to lose because he no longer wanted to sleep with you.

You walked across the floor to him and he held out a glass tumblr of the whiskey. "Thank you sir" you whispered before downing almost the entire thing in one gulp. His eyes widened slightly. "That kind of night?" You scoffed "You could say that" he was still sipping on his glass and a part of you had an urge to grab his and down it just for the burn of it. You tapped your nails along your glass "What was so important Rick?" you asked looking up at him and he laughed "Always straight to the point with you"

You shrugged "Well I mean no point in beating around the bush here" you gulped down what was left in your glass then sat it down. He swallowed his then reached for your hip, pulling you closer to him "C'mere. I've missed being alone with you" you let him pull you against his chest but braced your palms against the hard muscles to keep some distance between you even as he tried yet again to kiss you and you turned your head "Did I do something wrong? I don't think I broke any of the rules" he asked, settling to kiss the top of your head as his hands settled on your hips.

You laughed lightly "You did nothing Rick but I know what you want to talk about" he pulled back to look down at you and he looked uncertain? "You do?" you nodded "You're my friend Rick, probably one of my closest friends if not closest anymore. You're important to me and I wouldn't want to lose you but I ain't really a fuck me goodbye type. You don't fuckin want me? cool. You want Kristin? I get it, she's your type but I don't have to like it nor do I have to see it flaunted in my face so if I'm distant for a while don't take it personal" He took a step back, untucking himself from around you.

You watched as he shook his head, running a hand down his face before he looked at you and laughed. The noise still managing to wrap itself around you despite being at your expense "You've been jealous?" "No I haven't" you argued and he took a step closer, whispering your name.

You shook your head "I knew what this was from the start" "Still not answering the question" he took another step and you unintentionally took a step backwards "She's a scientist and gorgeous" he nodded "Yeah" a flame of anger flickered through you at him admitting it that easily and to your face. "I knew whatever this was wouldn't last from the moment we met her" you breathed and he took two steps towards you which caused you to take two steps backwards and you cursed when you felt your back hit the counter. He planted a hand on either side of you, palm flat down on the counter and leaned down to speak into the shell of your ear "Still avoiding the fact that you've been downright mean to me because you've been jealous"

You turned your head slightly to meet his eyes, trying to ignore how close your face was and how you'd barely have to lean in for your lips to find his "Yes! Ok? Fuck you Rick! I've been fucking jealous! For so long I've been at your side, leading the squad and dealing with Waller's bullshit, having your back and you having mine. I've been in your bed, you've been in mine and I fooled myself into thinking just because I wouldn't want anyone else that you wouldn't either and now I have to sit back and watch you be with her and pretend that it's not hurting me to not lose you completely so yes I am fucking jealous that she'll have you. Happy?"

His eyes studied your face for a heartbeat and you could feel your heart stutter. Normally you could read Rick's emotions fairly easily but this was once you had no clue what was going on in that head of his. After what felt like too long he laughed again, lighter this time before closing the distance between the two of you. The first brush of his lips against yours drove reason out of your mind. You knew it was a bad idea, a clean break healed easier but fuck you needed this man like you needed air.

His hands moved to your hips, easily picking you up and sitting you on the counter so he could step between your legs. His tongue slipped past your lips, teasing yours as he swallowed the moan that escaped you. Your hands tangled themselves in his hair, tugging gently. When the need for air forced the two of you apart he moved from your lips to kiss down your jaw then to your neck. One of his hands slipped between your thighs, cupping your clothed core as he bit down on your pulse point then sucked the skin into his mouth. a broken sob of a moan that was somewhere between a praise and a curse falling from your lips.

When your brain caught up to the fact that he was marking you, visibly you shoved a hand against his chest "Rick, stop" he froze the moment the words left you,hands moving off your body and lips leaving your skin. His broad chest was heaving as he looked down at you through heavy lashes "What's wrong sweetheart?" it took you two times to manage to get enough air in your lungs to actually form coherent thoughts "What kind of fucking response is marking me?" he grinned "I thought a clear enough one" he leaned in again to brush a gentle kiss against your lips "I don't want Kristin. I haven't wanted to talk about her. I want you. I only agreed to these damn rules because you freaked after the first time we slept together and I couldn't stand the idea of you running away from me"

You swallowed hard, this was Rick. The best man you'd ever met, the only man you'd ever truly could imagine something with. "You want me?" you asked in such a small voice you flinched. He pushed your hair back out of your face, hand cupping the back of your neck as he kissed your forehead then the tip of your nose then your cheek before his lips found yours, a lingering kiss full of every promise he couldn't put words to "Every part of you" you felt a twinge of guilt when you thought about the parts he didn't know about. "Rick, I.." he cut you off with another kiss before saying "Darlin, anything you want to tell me you can but please let me take you to bed. I've never got to go to sleep with you in my arms and wake up with you there" you nodded slowly and started to climb off the counter but instead he pulled you into his arms giving you no choice but to wrap your arms around his waist "I can walk Rick!" you squealed and he nipped at your throat "I prefer this"

-----------------------

You were half asleep with Rick's head laid on your bare stomach. Even after so many times of the two of you sleeping together he'd treated you like this was the first time, exploring every inch of skin. You were spent from how many times he'd pushed you to that brink and over so you were currently just enjoying the feeling of him exploring the body.

He kissed passed your navel and you felt him still right before his fingers grazed the new scar on your right side "Baby where'd this come from?" you tried to control your heart rate because you knew he could hear it from where he was laying. You leaned up slightly to look and shrugged "I'm not sure honestly" his lips trailed across it "It wasn't there the last time we had sex" You laid back against the pillow, trailing your fingers through his hair "Are you sure?" when you cut your eyes back down at him he was giving you that "Cut the bullshit" look "Fairly certain I've kissed every inch of you multiple times" you shrugged "I honestly don't know Rick" he finally nodded before making his way up your body.

When he got to your lips he kissed you gently before pulling you over to lay across his chest. Your fingers traced the mark he'd insisted you give him to match the one he'd planted on your neck "What about Waller?" you asked and he scoffed "That bitch sees us as tools, weapons. As long as we're effective she doesn't give a shit. Hell she'd probably he thrilled to have more shit to hold over our heads"

You shook your head "Yeah, I don't like the idea of her using me to make you jump through hoops" he smiled before brushing his lips against yours "She's had the power to do that for a lot longer than you think" "Oh" you said quietly and he nodded "Don't worry, we'll handle it as it comes. Now let me hold you since I've never been allowed to" you laughed and turned to tuck your back against his chest. He pulled you as close to him as he could before placing a kiss to your bare shoulder "Get some sleep. We can handle the crazy tomorrow"

If Waller noticed a shift between you and Rick she didn't comment on it. Your work dynamic didn't change, hell it shocked you to realize a lot of your dynamic didn't change. Had you and Rick been a couple and you were the last to realize?

You were finishing up paperwork when a knock at the office door made you look up to see Kristin standing there "Hey" you spoke and she smiled "Hey" she cut her eyes at Rick who looked busy at work but you knew he was listening to every word then back at you "Can I buy you a coffee so we can talk?" you felt your stomach knot but nodded nonetheless. You stood up and grabbed your jacket off the back of your chair, walking around your desk. You tapped Rick's on the way by "Want me to bring your usual back?" he looked from you to Kristin, a silent ask of if you were ok in his eyes. You gave him a smile so he nodded "Yeah. Thanks"

You turned to Kristin and smiled "Your car or my jeep" she shrugged "Your jeep is fine by me" you waved a hand towards the exit "Then let's go. Any excuse to leave that Waller wont blow a coronary about is fine by me" when she laughed a part of you felt bad about how much you'd disliked her when you thought there was something between her and Rick "Can't blame you there. I'd offer for you to bring Colonel Flag but I think you'll want this conversation to just be the two of us" ok that made you nervous but you both knew she couldn't say anything further in the building so you nodded "Rick's a big boy. He can amuse himself while I'm gone"

---------------------

You sat across from Kristin, staring down into your coffee and trying to process what she'd just told you "So the military is doing what exactly? experiments with meta and mutation genes?" she nodded "They're trying to form better soldiers. Find better mutations to see if humans could develop them,from the medical records Amanda released on you, how your blood has healed the squad even without them knowing..they're going to want samples before the lectures in D.C"

You nodded slowly "How much blood? Are they going to try to drain me here?" you could feel yourself start to panic, not for yourself as much as the fact that you knew if they came for you the three most important people to you would be willing to die to save you,Rick of course along with Sergeant Simon O'Reilly and Staff Sergeant Johnny Moore. Not to mention if they knew of your genes they may know of Johnny's.

"I've made a deal for one vial of bone marrow and that is it. That was the best I could do, I'm sorry. I never meant for my research to be bastardized like this" you could tell she meant every word so you reached across the table to gently take her hand in yours, squeezing it lightly "Thank you for fighting for me and for not exposing me to Rick before I'm ready" she nodded and in turn squeezed your hand "If it's any help, if it was me,no matter how bad of dealings I'd had in the past nothing could change my feelings for my wife. I've seen the way Rick looks at you. That man worships the ground you walk on. He won't be angry at you for who you are but he may be angry for you feeling like you had to hide who you are from him all this time" you knew she was right but you were so deep now how the hell were you supposed to get out of the hole?

-------------------------

JM: Fuck the government

SO: Video call asap luv

The moment you rolled over and checked your phone you knew that Johnny had been cornered about his genes as well. While you had a healing mutation he carried a different type, he found at a young age he could manipulate time around him. Slow it down or speed it up. Made him hell on the battlefield. "Fuck" you cursed under your breath, forgetting Rick was in the bed with you until his arm encircled your waist and his lips brushed the base of your spine "Somethin wrong?" his accent was always heavier when he just woke up. You turned to place a quick kiss on his lips "No baby. Johnny and Simon just got into some shit and need me to call em" he chuckled "Always pulling the men in your life outta the fire" you winked over your shoulder at him "Someone has to" before slipping out of his bedroom and out into the living room.

You hit the buttons on your phone and within a few seconds both Simon and Johnny's faces were on your screen "There she is" Simon spoke first, his irish accent making your lips quirk up. Johnny leaned closer to his phone "Hold on now. That isn't your place" you felt your face warm when both of their eyebrows shot up. "Has our little spitfire got herself a boyfriend?" Simon chuckled and you rolled your eyes "Wasn't there a reason for this call?" Johnny nodded with a grin "Yeah but we can get to that in a minute" you shook your head "No, now" they both laughed then went into telling you how Johnny had gotten the call about a vial of bone marrow having to be given. "Yeah, I did too," you whispered. "Are we fucked?" Johnny asked and you shrugged "I hope not? I've got to escort Waller and the leading scientist to DC for the lectures behind the science so maybe I can dig more"

Simon grinned "Good, we'll be there too" "Really?" you asked with a matching grin because you hadn't seen both of them together in person in years. "Yeah, someone has to represent the corps considering someone got pulled over to the redacted sides of things" Johnny teased and you shook your head "Please Moore, once a marine always a marine" "You better remember that" he laughed then he whistled to get Simon's attention and you knew what they were thinking before Simon ever asked "So, who is this mystery fella that got our little lassie to settle down?"

Before you could say anything the bedroom door opened behind where you stood in the center of the living room and Rick walked out behind you, shirtless. Johnny and Simon both spoke over each other "Good morning Colonel Flag!" the shit eating grins on their faces made you want to stab the both of them considering you could just give them blood and heal them afterwards. He looked from you to the phone before nodding "Simon, Johnny"

Rick stopped to kiss your cheek "I'm making coffee" then headed for the kitchen. You finally looked back to your phone screen to see Simon had his arms crossed and Johnny was shaking his head "We need to discuss a dowry" "I want to know his intentions!" "Goodbye boys! See you in D.C!" you laughed before hanging up the call.

Rick leaned against the counter when you looked up and motioned towards your phone "They're gonna be in D.C?" you nodded and he smiled "Might not be that bad then if you get to catch up with them" you shook your head with a laugh "Or may be worse, with them there is no way to tell"

----------------------------

The day you went to give the bone marrow you were grateful for the healing you possessed because that shit hurt. You were still limping slightly when you got back to the office but Rick was luckily at Belle Reeve handling something about someone trying to make an army of possums. When you walked into your office you realized it was warmer than normal and a coffee was sitting on your desk, still steaming. A box sat next to the cup of coffee and when you opened it there was a small thing of what looked like hand cream inside with a note from Kristin "This is a more diluted version of what's in your pyro packs. It'll help" you smiled and sat down gently in the chair, wishing like hell you could help Johnny because he'd be in pain for a few days from this shit at least.

By the time Rick got back your hip was a dull ache and you'd turned the heat down in the office. He closed the door behind him and shook his head "Twenty six" you laughed at how tired he looked from chasing giant rodents over how he normally looked after missions. He walked around your desk and leaned down to place a gentle kiss to your lips "Your physical go ok?" you nodded "All clear for another year" he smiled "Good to know" you hated lying to him but how the hell did you bring it up in conversation now?

D.C. was gorgeous as always. The lectures were being held in a nearby conference hall that was so far locked down you were surprised the guest list didn't require a dna scan to get in the front door. Day one was casual, meaning you and Rick were both in suits. The skirt you wore hit just above your knees and you'd caught Rick being distracted more than once and had to remind him that the two of you were supposed to be looking the part of guards for Waller, that was why she'd allowed your holsters to be worn in plain sight.

His hand skimmed your lower back and he whispered in your ear "Something about you in a skirt and armed is just beyond sexy" you shook your head with a laugh "Easy soldier. We have time for that later" you just hoped Waller had nothing else up her sleeve. Johnny and Simon had landed about an hour after your plane but you hadn't met up with them yet, you hoped to see them soon but Waller had to dismiss you and Rick for you to be able to socialize anyways.

The two of you walked in behind Waller, you on her left and Rick on her right. She headed for the front of the room so you trailed behind like good puppies. She greeted an older gentleman who eyed you "Amanda" she introduced both you and Rick by rank. the older gentleman nodded to you both "Colonel, Corporal"

The next two hours went pretty much like that until the blessed time came that she disappeared into meetings that you nor Rick had clearance for so you were dismissed until summoned. Rick cut his eyes at you considering you were still in the conference hall "Well we got a couple hours" you felt a smirk pulling at your lips until you heard an accented voice say "Nope, if she's not busy you gotta share her" you turned to see Simon and Johnny walking towards you.

"Simon!" you greeted, pulling him into a hug first then when Johnny pouted letting him go to pull the other man into one as well. You looked them over and couldn't help but laugh. Both were around Rick's height, Simon maybe had an inch on him. Johnny had dark black hair and bright blue eyes while Simon had honey brown hair and the darkest green eyes you'd ever seen. Both were decent looking men and despite the suits they were clearly being made for them they looked so damn uncomfortable it was pathetic.

Johnny held onto your waist and looked over your head at Rick "Flag. Treating our girl well?" he nodded "Of course" Simon winked at you before saying "I think we should all go to lunch while you two are free. Me and Johnny want to have a talk with Rick" you spun out of Johnny's arms to playfully glare at him and he laughed "C'mon lassie, think the colonel gonna scare off that easy?" Rick cleared his throat and when the three of you looked at him he waved towards the exit "Let's go get lunch" then reached for your hand. When you let him take it you heard Simon chuckle "oh he's gonna be fun"

They'd known Rick for a while now but knowing him as your partner versus knowing him as your boyfriend? That was two very different experiences. You shot a look over your shoulder at Simon "Behave Sergeant" he winked at you "Don't worry luv. If he can hold up under you me and Johnny wont phase him"

---------------------

"Oh I absolutey did fuckin not!" you laughed, tossing a mozzarella stick at Johnny across the table. He was currently embellishing a story about one night when your unit had gone for drinks in Germany and a bar fight had ensued. Rick cut his eyes at you, a grin pulling at his lips "I don't know baby, sounds like something you'd do" you mock gasped then looked at Simon for backup "A little help here Sergeant?" he shook his head "You're on your own luv" you tsk tsked "Three men like yourselves ganging up on a defenseless woman" that made all of them bust out laughing "You're a lot of things, defenseless ain't one of em" Rick teased pulling you closer so he could place a kiss on your temple.

Simon gave you a look at the action and you felt yourself warm even before he reached for your hand "C'mon Corporal, let's go pay the tabs" Rick passed you his card before you could ever reach for your own and Johnny made an approving sound before you glared at him and he raised his hands in defense "I said nothing!"

You followed Simon across the little bar and grill the four of you had chosen, waiting for him to ask. He managed to wait until the waitress came back with your receipts "Have ya told him?" "Told him what?" you decided on the innocent route but knew that would fall flat "About your.." he paused when someone passed by before deciding on "diagnosis" you didn't meet his eyes and that was answer enough "How the hell have you kept it from him this long?" you shrugged "It hasn't been easy believe me and that was before I started sleeping with him"

He shook his head with a laugh "How did that come about anyways?" you shrugged again "Shit happens?" this time he was the one to shrug "Foundation of some of the most solid relationships right there. I may be overstepping but can I ask, do ya love him?" you opened your mouth to deny it then closed it back when no sound would immediately come out. Did you love Rick? When a few seconds passed with you neither confirming nor denying he put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed gently "If he cares about you as much as I believe he does it won't matter to him. Didn't matter to me when I found out about you or Johnny" you nodded slowly "Thanks Si" he smiled "Anytime luv" before the two of you headed back to the table.

---------------------

For the next few days whenever you and Rick weren't at Waller's beck and call you ended up making sure to carve out time in your day for Simon and Johnny. You hadn't realized how much you'd missed them. You and Rick had just made it back to your room from a bar with them when you finally decided on having enough liquid courage to tell him the truth.

You watched him close the door and lock it as you slipped your shoes off then walked over to where he stood, leaned back against the door, watching you with an unreadable expression "Rick?" he seemed to break out of whatever trance he'd been in and smiled before pulling you into his arms. "I'm glad to see you having fun catching up with your guys sweetheart. I can tell they missed you and you missed them: You nodded, letting your hand trail down the front of his shirt to begin working on the buttons of it "I want to talk to you about something important" His hands covered yours, stopping you from disrobing him any further "Are you transferring from ARGUS?" "What?" you froze at his question because even if you wanted to you couldn't for five more years and even then you'd want him to leave with you.

He slipped his shirt off and tossed it onto the bed before crashing his lips against yours in a kiss that was hungry and rushed. You kissed him back, trying to pull him closer until he suddenly broke away from you "If you want to transfer I'll support you, it's just..:" he trailed off and leaned down to place a kiss on your neck before continuing "I love you and I want you to be happy but I can't pretend it won't hurt to be away from you"

You damn near stumbled back from him in shock and wanted to kick yourself for how defeated he looked "I'm sorry. It's too soon. I shouldn't have sprung that on you and I'm not wanting a response I just wanted to tell you" he ran a hand through his hand and moved to step around you "I'm gonna go shower" your hand moved to grab his before he could get too far past you "Rick, wait"

The moment he turned you pulled him into a kiss. He hesitated at first then gave in quickly, his hands moving down to grip your thighs and lift you into his arms. You wrapped your legs around his waist, breaking away from his lips to kiss across his jaw and down his neck before finally saying "I love you Rick and as much as I miss them I'm not leaving" the smile he gave you made your heart jump "Really?" you nodded and he leaned his head over on your neck "Thank god" then caught your lips in another kiss before walking you over to the bed and gently laying you down on it before climbing up your body, slipping your shirt off and leaving a trail of kisses as he did so.

When he got back to your lips he smiled "In that case can whatever you needed to tell me wait? Because the way these jeans fit has had my dick half hard all night" a laugh fell from you that quickly turned into a moan when he rutted his hips down into yours to prove a point "It can wait"

Unfortunately for you it seemed fate saw fit for Rick to find out one way or another.

You stood next to Rick, both of you studying the room around you. The highest value targets in the free world were currently in attendance so nerves were a bit high to say the least. Simon and Johnny were working the north exit while the two of you were covering the south. A few more teams were set up throughout but you didn't trust any of them the way you trusted your guys.

So far you'd heard three lecturers drone on and on along with a few people that were definitely on Waller's christmas card list. You would be glad for the next three hours to be over. You were just about to crack a joke to Rick about the man currently on stage when one of the other team's voices cut through your com "We've had a security breach. Level one evac"

"Fuck" you and Rick both swore as you moved in unison. Each team of guards had been assigned four targets each to move. You had Waller, Kritstin and two more. Once they were secure you would come back and help as you were needed. You spotted Johnny and Simon herding their targets towards the stairwell leading up to the helipad as you grabbed Kristin and pushed her in front of you. "Move" Rick took point going up the stairwell with you guarding the rear.

Once your targets were loaded and gone you headed back down, meeting Simon and Johnny halfway. "What is this shit?" you asked and Johnny met your eyes "Extremists for humankind purity" Fuck. That was a hate group targeting anyone with mutant or meta genes and there were civilians here. "Fuckin assholes" Rick cursed and Simon smirked slighlty "Lets show em Flag" Rick nodded so Simon looked at you "You with Johnny, Flag with me"

Rick looked at you "Stay safe" you winked at him "Always" then bumped your shoulder to Johnny's "Like old times. Lets get it"

----------------------------

You fell into a rhythm with Johnny so damn easy it was like no time at all had passed. You could feel the pull of his power simply because you knew what to look for but it helped the two of you to clear civilians out faster and take enemies down easier. The banquet hall looked like a fuckin war zone and that description was a little too accurate for your liking.

You saw Simon and Rick take another group out and was about to call an all clear when you saw a barrel blast half a second before a bullet tore through the air towards you. Johnny was too far away to slow it so you were helpless but to feel the consuming burn which was so different from the one that healed you as it ripped through your abdomen and came out the other side. Johnny took out the shooter and was to your side in a heartbeat pulling you into his lap. You saw a few grazes on his arms and what looked like a knife slash on his face. Your hand shakingly moved to your stomach, a gasp of pain leaving you when you touched the wound "Fuck, it hurts Johnny" "I know baby. I know" he was already stripping his shirt off to hold pressure. "SIMON" he screamed as Rick and Simon came running in. Rick screamed your name and fell to his knees at your side "What the fuck happened?"

Your eyes moved to Rick's face and you saw tears threatening to fall "It's ok Rick. I'm ok" he shook his head "Sweetheart" Simon shouldered him out of the way "Move Flag" Rick's eyes turned hard "I'm not leaving her" Simon moved to pull you out of Johnny's lap and into his arms "Then you'll be what kills her and I'm not losing her either. We know how to save her. Now on your feet and lead us to her luggage or get the hell out of the way" Rick looked to you, tears working their way down his face and you nodded, grimacing from pain "Trust them" "Follow me" Rick told Simon before heading towards the stairwell leading up towards the rooms, all three men taking three steps at a time.

----------------------------

Rick argued you needed a hospital. Simon argued him and Johnny could help you just fine and you told him that they could so he was pacing the room, watching Johnny dig through your med kit and throw different things onto the bed next to where Simon had laid you. Simon ripped open four metallic bags and Rick watched as he poured them directly into your gunshot wound after ensuring there were no bullet fragments in, your screaming during that time had nearly made him kill both men. He could hear your teeth grit from where he stood, even when you whispered something to Johnny who whispered something back before finally sighing and leaned down to let you wipe your blood soaked fingers across his face and the grazes on his arms. What the fuck was going on?

You could imagine what was going through Rick's head but you were focusing on not dying at the moment, then arguing with Johnny to take enough blood for where he'd been grazed and sliced. Eventually Simon gingerly bandaged your stomach then looked over at Rick before looking back at you "We'll be nearby luv" You grabbed his hand "Thank you" he smiled "Always"

You tried to push yourself up into a sitting position and Rick moved to help you, being careful of your stomach. You noticed his hands shake slightly, "Y/N?" he was looking at your bandage. The bleeding had already stopped. You smiled slightly "I meant when I said I love you Rick, please know that" he sat down slowly on the side of the bed to not jostle you before taking your hand "And I meant it when I told you I love you but what's going on" You swallowed hard before saying "I have a meta mutation gene"

"Healing?" he asked and you nodded "The packs are called pyro packs, they force my core temperature to rise high enough to jumpstart the process. As long as it's not my heart or head and I get help fast enough I can heal from an injury" "The scar on your side" he spoke and you grimaced "I got shot on the last mission and talked Harley through the first aid"

He nodded, running a hand over his head "So Harley knows?" you shrugged "Kind of?" "Who definitely knows?" he asked in a small voice so you took a breath before saying "Waller, Kristin, Johnny and Simon." he nodded slowly "Can I ask why you didn't trust me?" when you finally looked at him your heart crumpled "I didn't want you to look at me differently"

He reached for your hand and when you let him take it his shoulder sagged slightly "You're still you. There's nothing that would change that to me. I just don't know why it took something like this for you to tell me"

You felt tears start to slip free from your eyes and he quickly brushed them away "Don't cry darlin. Please don't cry" you leaned into his touch "Do you hate me Rick?" he shook his head "Never. You hear me? Nothing could ever make me hate me, especially not something like this" you smiled as he leaned closer and brushed a gentle kiss onto your lips before pausing "How many times have you healed me?" you grinned with your forehead against his "More times than you probably want to know"

He laughed and pressed another kiss to your lips "You'll have to teach me how to take care of you" "I will" you promised and he smiled against your lips "Good, because you're not getting rid of me that easily Corporal" you laughed before saying "Nice to know because I kind of want to keep you Colonel"

#rick flag smut #rick flag fanfiction #rick flag imagine #rick flag x y/n #rick flag x reader #suicide squad fanfiction

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manwtv · 2 years ago

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They make me insane <3

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aliceinborderlandsquidgame · 19 days ago

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In-ho as Yandere/Obsess with You (Player) |

This is going to have two versions.

Yandere!In-ho x Fem!Player!Reader

Yandere!Detective!In-ho x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Obsessive!In-ho - Yandere - Power Imbalance - NON CANON EVENTS DOES NOT FOLLOW PLOTLINE - Suggestive parts/NSFW - Manipulation - Grammar mistakes -

Yandere!In-ho its the type of Yandere who first goes into denial over his obsession. Yes, he has read your file multiple times by now. At least ten more times than the other files. He just wants to know all about you.

No, he wont admit it out loud. He would rather pass his little free time in his room looking at the cameras he got around Seoul to keep tabs on you.

Gets angry when he first sees the video of you getting slapped during the recruit time. He may call that centrain recruiter to dispose of him.

While he sees everybody who ends at the games as nothing but low trash (yes even knowing he was part of them once) you are different to him.

You may have ended there for the most stupid reason and yet he wont mind but would feel pity over you.

Will order that the games are easier for you, that the food you get its more healthy and has more cantidad than the rest. But its subtle since he does not want the rest of the players to think you are getting special treatment (you are).

If he sees any player getting too close to you, or its informed by the guards that a centrain player has not so pure desires over you, that one is out. The next game its harder for them.

Will he joy the games to keep a closer eye ? Depends.

Part of him likes to stay in the shadows, and enjoy the show. You are his Star during these games. The only time he moves the games so you can easily win. He hopes that you feel watched and protected, that when the times comes you will ask to stay with him. He already prepared another room till you are ready to fully move with him.

He becomes so enamored that his actions are off. While usually calculated, with you he wont waste a single time on getting the most cruel deaths for these who go against you. A traitor? He will tell the guards to keep them alive so he can personally torture him.

The guards prays that you accept on staying with him because his mood has been down and bad the last few games and they need a rest.

There are cameras everywhere, and he uses his position to keep a close eye on you. During night one camera will point at your bed, he passes most of his night watching you. It relaxes him.

NSFW:

He also has a not so saint side, he watches you go to the bathroom to relieve some stress. These are his favorite moments. The sounds and faces you make as you try to get yourself off. He has recording that one and used it multiple times till he is out of cum.

When the games ends and you win, he does things different. Does not send you home at once but rather keeps you in a well secured room with some lame excuse, and what can you do ? This Man has an army behind him.

The Manipulation starts from him slowly getting closer to you, sharing the same interests, faking the same or similar traumatic past.

Yes, you probably resent him a lot. But he is such a good liar, snake tongue and all. That you fall for his lies, how he was forced into this and how when he saw you he could not let someone as precious as you die.

Will take advantage of how emotional drained you are. Offering his ear to listen you rant about different topics from the games to your life.

You are quiet touch starved so he uses these times of vulnerability to hold you close to his chest and caress your hair.

Does give you a bit of freedoom to go and walk around the island, but a guard its with you during all of it.

He is in fact no scared to hurt you in order to keep you by his side. But his favorite way to do it would be forcing a baby inside you. Now dont get me wrong, he WONT force himself on you. He would just casually forget to use a condom and also confuse the anticonceptive pills.

He cant wait to have you all round with his baby. Maybe this is not the best place to raise a kid, but hell does he care ? No. He can make some calls and get things sorted out.

The important part is that you wont be able to leave him.

~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~○~

Now, what if he decides to join the games and be your personal guard dog?

He gets enamored by you from reading your file. Maybe there is a detail that resembles his past and that pulls him towards you. So much that after see you almost die in the first game he cant help it.

He needs to be there for you.

He is the quiet player that goes to you in the first night to probably offer you a shoulder or a ear to rant to. Maybe if you are reserved about it he would sneak some sweets not telling you how he got them.

He is the one who protects you from any player. Specially males that wants to use you for their own pleasure. Most get the hint to not approach you in order to not get their bones crushed.

Its clear you have a special treatment, from how the guards just give you free pass to the bathroom or you seem to get a bit more times in the games.

When others notice that they beg you to team up with them since you are an advantage yourself.

By this point In-ho its your shadow and no one questions it. He will ever start to poison your mind with his ideals. Like how the game are a necesary evil and how if players did not truly want them then these would not happen.

Hell he would even request a voting to show you.

And no matter why you ended there. He would whisper sweet lies in your ear at night telling how you are different and how you are above the rest. No one compares to you. That if you win he is sure you would have an incredible life and make something out of it.

He already has planned on getting you "eliminated", pay up your debt and make you stay with him at the island.

Is he going to tell you who he is ? Well yes. And he does not expect you to fall quick for him. He knows whatever progress he made at the games will be like nothing and he will do even more calculated moves from now on.

And how does he make you fall for him at the games ? Well first he protects you, lets others know that you are off limits. He gives you part of his food, during nights he sleeps close to you till one night a fight breaks and he defends you like his life depends on it.

After it you most likely ask him to sleep with you. At first he may leave some space between both of you since he does not want to push you too quick. However his heart is beating so fast he cant even close his eyes, he may keep an eye on you liking how peaceful you look while you sleep, away of this reality.

He will let you come at him first. Like one night you may have a nightmare and you will end asking if he can hold you.

Of course he says yes. It does not matter how, maybe he will let you put your head on his chest or be the big spoon and cover you with his body.

Its almost a shame how much better he sleeps with you in his arms.

During games if its a game where you must play alone he still keeps himself close to you. When it comes to teams he is there.

NSFW:

The bathroom stalls end being your meet up place to relief some stress.

For you probably at first its just sex. No feelings, to him its so much more.

Its passionate, its dirty. He knows no one will bother since he is there with you. No one is allowed to enter.

How would he take you ? He can easily lift you against the wall, kiss down your neck and collarbone. Will held himself back from marking you. Its going to make you wrap your legs around him as he pushes his hard dick inside you. He wont bother on muffing your moans, no he wants to listen to them knowing he is the cause of them.

If during one of the meetings you want to give him head he wont complain. But wont be soft. He will use your mouth like his personal toy, pulling your head and fucking your troath till he sees tears down your face.

#squid game x y/n #squid game imagines #suicide squad imagine #squid game x reader #in ho x reader #front man x reader #the front man x reader

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arminzblackbimbo · 4 months ago

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the girl is mine

blackfem!reader x suicide squad joker

tw: mdni, kinda dark nothing too crazy, rough treatment, slow sex, missionary, choking, reader is kinda a crybaby, biting, hair pulling, nipple play, boob slapping ??, “doll” used as pet name, reader calls him "jay", bruising, blood mentioned, blood sucking, begging, dom joker, they are both kinda masochist, grinding, and bad spelling !!

"doll stop crying" he is holding your shaking form, your head in the crease of his neck. you can hear him gruff out in your ear, he gives you all of these gifts and presents and all he gets in return is tears. no thank you's or kisses.

all you wanted was to get another necklace to add to your jewelry collection, from when he does his nightly robberies he always brings you something back. something shiny that makes you swoon over him. you’ve always wore gold jewelry but just mere minutes earlier joker gave you a silver necklace, knowing you can't stand that color.

you have tears coming down your cheeks, hyperventilating as your face comes out of hiding in his neck to look at him. you can his silver teeth grinding because he is annoyed. " jay, i-i-i’m sorry but i just don’t want that necklace " you stammered out, not getting a chance to collect yourself before he grips the sides of your neck tightly making you a little light headed. you grip his wrist, tears coming down a little faster. your eyes getting glossy while he rolls his.

your chest heaves even with your air flow constricted you let heavy breaths out. watching you as you scratch at his hand at your throat. satisfied to see you gasp out. "be grateful doll, i could snap your neck since your being so rude" he loves how pretty you look when he holds you throat. it makes him harder in his pants. he finally lets you go when he sees your eyes slightly roll back. smiling watching you cough out trying to speak again.

when you speak again your still sniffing, but your voice is now a little raspy. "i just wanted some gold" all the things he does for you and you have the nerve to pout and cry. he is sick of it, the hand that was just at your throat going to grip your hair tightly, causing "ow's" to leave your lips when he uses your hair to move you from the living room to the bedroom

he just laughs while he drags you down the hallway, doing his classic clown laugh that scares you especially when he gets like this. " your just a spoiled thing, ain't you cupcake ?" pulling your hair harder when he shuts the door of your shared bedroom. your lips pouting when you can feel your head throb as he pulls you onto the bed, laying you down next to him

loving how your whine when he presses his fingers into your scalp “jay that hurts” he dismisses your pain.

covering your lips with his hand that has that smiling mouth on it. that he loves to tease and antagonize you with. “smile more doll” laughing more at you. playing with your feelings. moving his hand to start kiss your pouting lips roughly to stop your cries.

he loves to act like you annoy him when really he is happy with anything that you do. deep down he cares for you deeply and you both know that, its why you act like this. he finally lets your hair go as he lays you down flat on your back. still keeping his lips locked on you while he puts his weight heavily on top of you.

feeling your legs wrap around his waist and arms wrap around his neck tightly. the position making your body start to tingle your done crying, now your body feels hot. his length starts to throb as his tongue moves with yours and spit starts moving past your lips. he is messy with the kisses wanting them his way not slow like how you like them. "please jay" you gasp when your lips pull apart from each other.

"i shouldn't give you anything, always begging and crying" he grumbles against your lips, biting the skin to see you wince. his blue eyes burning into yours watching you intense biting harder into the soft skin of your lip to see the discomfort. he lets you go your lips swelling from the assault.

giving you one last kiss making it sloppy before he is pecking down your neck, where he begins to bite that already bruised skin from his rough hold, his teeth bruising you even more. even though it hurts so bad it feels so good. you’ve grown the love the feeling “jay, i need you please” your pulling him closer to you. holding him securely against you.

he grabs your face between his hand squeezing your checks tightly together “shut up” he mumbles out, coming to look you in the eyes, he can still see the tear marks that are etched into your face. he almost wants to roll his eyes how lovesick he really is, rolling his tongue along your face to collect your dried tears “all the whining im sick of it”

he has to pry your hands off him to help you take your shirt and pants off so he has all the access he needs to mark you up as much as he can. you can feel his silver hit your skin first before anything it makes you shiver with how cold the metal is. running your hands through his soft green hair to just touch him.

he starts his focus near your collar bone where he bites hard enough to make you draw blood, blood that he has to suction his lips around to collect. making you wince and gasp, looking down to the purple pains that are starting to spread across your skin. really when you plead and beg for him it makes him stiffen more in his pants, but he can’t let you know that.

your body wrapped around him again as you crave the attention of his body. he positions his mouth right by your ear “don’t play soft with me sweetheart, i know you like it rough” his voice raspy in your ear when he bites the shell of it while you hiss and whine. running his tongue in the ridges, lifting under you back to help take your bra off. letting it fly across the room when he starts kissing you against your chest, sucking on the skin of your breast

you slightly tug on his hair and he moans so sweetly. you feel the start of you sweating, the arousal giving you a temperature like feeling. your body starting to grind and roll up into him feeling how stiff he is, giving you so much pleasure and he not even inside you yet.

you nearly jumpstart when he suddenly bites your nipple the pain making you jump running his tongue over the pebble and suctioning his lips to soothe the pain. “feel so good” you whispers gripping his hair tighter when he switches to your other breast. sinking his teeth in harder to hear those pretty noise he loves working his hips to build a rhythm into you

letting your breast go, he lifts his head up to just admirers your naked body, reaching his hands to touch all the welts he created. your so cute it makes him aggressive for some reason. sometimes he just wants to squeeze you against him til he can’t anymore.

makes him do things like pressing your breast together roughly. your so adorable he can’t help it, you have to arch your back up for some relief. watching the flesh spill from in between his fingers. he lets them free loving how their decorations he has added to your skin, he pulls his hand back and smacks the mounds of flesh

the static feeling has you jumping, trying to run away from the unique state he has you in when he starts to twist your sore nipples between his thumb and pointer finger. holding them tightly to stretch them as far as they can go. slapping your breast again while he watches them jiggle

he’s infatuated with you, how your body reacts to him, even your crybaby ways. sliding your panties off. “you ready for me doll ?” distracting with a question so he can strip himself of his clothes, waiting for your answer. your mouth to busy watering looking at his body, it’s so sculpted and the different images on his body has you tracing them with your fingertips while you wait for him to finish undressing

your eyes locking on his bobbing thickness when he pulls himself free. “so ready for you” you can feel the wetness leaking from you just looking at him. positioning your body so that your legs are wide open your feet laying on the bed. wide open for him so he can see everything, so he can see you

joker just sees you spread out and it’s like he gets hypnotize. running his hands over your legs to comfort you preparing you. moving closer to your body adjusting to lightly tap the tip of him onto you to feel the stickiness between your folds. “i should punish you, shouldn’t fuck you at all. should make you beg all night” the cream covers him when continues with the motion, your wetness coating him “huh, since you don’t like my gifts ?” he questioned you, working his length between your puffy lips. the moisture helps him when start to roll into you not yet penetrating you. your clit being hit with his spitting head of precum

“jay im sorry” you mew he can already see those tears that he hates so much at the corners of your eyes. “you forgive me ?” you reach out to him your hand running on his flexing core. trying to seduce him to comply with your wants

he ignores you knowing your trying to get him to fall into your trap. he shoves you hand out the way voice gruff. positioning himself to poke into you slowly, you can feel your walls seperating when he moves deep, sucking him in. causing his moans to be animalistic almost sounding like he is growling. and he is still pushing his thicknesss into you.

you feel like you can’t breathe when he meets his pelvis with yours. he can’t even relax, because of your walls gripping him. your plushy walls pulsing while he is inbetween them “doll, your squeezing me so tight” he kisses your check softly. pulling his arms under you to pull you closer to him pressing your chest against his.

you crave the feeling of his soft kissing when he lays his head in your neck. kissing your neck tenderly touching the bruises and letting his tongue roll over them when he starts a gentle pace into you. “j-j-jay your so deep” your mouth right by his ear where he can hear you take ragged breaths

even though he grabs your hair hard making your head throb, makes you throat sore from him always squeezing his hand around it, from him bruising you in bites all over. but whenever he is inside of you he contradicts himself moving slowly. never being rough when he is inside your snug walls. instead he wants you to be rough with him.

his eyes rolling back when you start to grab at his back. your nails dragging on his skin and letting the burning feeling take over body. “scratch me harder baby” his voice light as he begs while he is humping you is so rhythmic the when the top of him catching in the back of your walls on that special spot which makes you grant his wishes. your nails dragging down his skin rougher

your legs have to stay open to make sure you can feel him. feel him almost reaching your cervix, blood coming from his fresh line wounds on his skin. he loves the pain it brings him pleasure, it over takes his body. he craves it from you whenever your walls consume him

he is moving slowly and steadily, making you desperate for just a little more. your fingers running through his soft strands. your fingers are doing the same thing your toes are doing, curling. pushing your fingers into his scalp grabbing tightly at his hair pulling his head back hard

you can see his lip move with each roll of his hips. he is talking to himself quietly, only speaking louder to praise you. he can’t collect himself, the burning in his scalp makes his eyes flutter and his lip come between his teeth. whimpers coming out to your ears.“harder, please fuck me harder” you beg you can feel a simmering feeling in your body

his head whips froward when you let his soft locs go “you know i can’t doll, you know…” his words jumbling together, you only catch the beginning. your legs coming to wrap around to keep him close. your back arching up when he angles his hips just right to hit the back of your walls, his groin rubbing on your clit.

he has to collect his breath when you look so eternal laid out and moaning for him. you wetness coating him so much he has use his knees so that he has proper direction and doesn’t slip into you. he can feel your legs starting shake around his waist. "come on baby you don’t wanna do your favorite part ?”

he knows you have so much love for wrapping your hands around his throat, dominating him makes you feel in charge. but really it’s his favorite part. having to use all your focus to bringing your shaky hands to cut his air supply off holding his neck, not yet adding pressure. "harder doll" his hips still stroking you slow and steady.

he can feels his blood pulse to his length when your cut his air flow off. threatening an early release from him that he has hold you tightly to not spill to quickly. he likes the pain it makes his body buzz. causing the new found piston of his hips.his hips rolling deeply into you while your body start shake more. pressing your thumbs almost makes it seems like your trying to touch the back of his throat.

noticing the whites of his eyes slowly taking over his pupils from the lack of oxygen. his pale neck turned purple with how hard he had you holding him. your hands letting him go watching him gasp and groan. legs around his waist while he strokes you so consistently. his milky skin and his tattoos make you dizzy.

the long strokes makes you start to feel the pit in your stomach, the high creeping up on you. grabbing his lower back with both hands scratching near the base of his back. “jayyy”

your consuming him, controlling him from how your plushness surrounds him, from your nail creating pleasure. the first reaction of you when you can feel the sensation reaching from the tip of your toes to you the ache in your pelvis, from how deep his hips work into yours. is to bite him like how he does you, sinking your teeth in his shoulder

“ugh cupcake, your trynna k-” he shakes on top of you. your both almost at your peak, biting him harder when you can feel the tingles all over your body while your moaning into his skin. “your trynna… trynna” he mumbles more feeling the quake in his loins. while your thighs are trembling faster

you both coming to your high at the same time, pulling him so close to your body, letting him free from your teeth. moaning more “j-jay please” your eyes rolling back when you let your body go. letting the euphoria take over. your whole body shaking while he can feel your walls taking his cum in.

he kisses you to swallow your moans, the sounds vibrating against each other. your arsoual at the same time makes your souls combine together he lets your lips go when your body stopped buzzing. seeing your eyelids flutter close when he pulls out of you

when you wake up from you sex induced nap. your meet with three gold necklaces and 6 golden bracelets gracing your wrist, making you smile dreamily

#dc joker #joker suicide squad #blackfem!reader #black reader #joker x black reader #dc comics smut #joker x blackfem!reader #blackfemreader #♪ the girl is mine - micheal jackson #this has been in my drafts since february omgg !!!#love y’all so much ♥︎ ♥︎#thank you for 300 followers !!#kinktober 2024 #lychee drafts ۟ ꪆ୧✧ㅤㅤ ۟#arminzblackbimbo ૮꒰ྀི˵ > ﻌ < ˵꒱ྀིა

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cherrycocaineee · 9 months ago

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41. Happy Birthday, Slut - Joker

*Synopsis: It’s Athena’s 19th birthday, it’s also been a complete year since she ran away with the Joker after he killed her abusive father. The Joker wants to make the day special for Athena, wants her to have a good birthday since it’s been awhile. And her birthday present…he’s got something special planned for that.*

*Warning: nsfw, 18+, dumbification, degradation, praising, rough sex, choking, restraints, legal age gap, daddy kink, semi-public sex, whatever else you wanna consider a warning lol.*

*A/N: just a reminder that I’ve changed the character name to Athena bc I had my daughter five months ago and named her Paisley.*

*Athena’s p.o.v*

Rays of sunlight pierced through a crack in the black curtains that covered the large panel glass windows in the room. I groaned, stretching my bed over the black, silk sheets. The Joker wasn’t lying beside me but that was normal most days, he was probably down in his study or something. I sat up, rubbing the sleep from my eyes before throwing my legs over the side of the bed. I flinched when I touched the cold floor. The floor was always so cold, I really needed to get some slippers.

I push myself up and head to the master bathroom, turning the light on. I turned on the hot water before slipping out of my silk nightgown. It slipped off my body with ease, then I took off my underwear and climbed inside. Hot water cascaded down my small frame, soaking my hair as I rinsed off. I grabbed my loofah and washed my body, then moved on to washing my hair. After my shower, I turned off the water and grabbed my towel, dried off then wrapped it around me before grabbing another towel to dry my hair.

As I walked out, I noticed the bed was remade and there was an outfit sitting out on the comforter. I looked around the room but didn’t see anyone. Either Mister J or one of his henchmen, Frost, did this. I walked over to the outfit and looked at it. It was a short sleeve, red dress with white polka dots and a low v-neck; it was also thigh high and I was sure if I bent over it would live zero to the imagination. There were a pair of white platform pumps that were absolutely gorgeous, a pair of ruby red earrings, and a small white handbag. It was a lovely outfit. I threw it on before going back into the bathroom where I straightened my hair and did my makeup.

My heels clicked against the marbled floor of the house as I walked down the stairs and headed towards Mister J’s study. Frost was just coming out when I arrived.

“Good morning, Frost.”

He looked at me and smiled. “Good morning, Athena.”

“Is Mister J in?”

He nodded his head before opening the door and letting me inside. I thanked him as he closed the door. Sitting behind his desk, Mister J was scribbling some stuff down on some papers; he looked up when he heard my heels. A grin stretched across his painted red lips.

“Ah, good morning, darling.”

He stood up from his chair and approached me, his tattooed hands immediately finding my hips. I smiled at him.

“Good morning, Mister J.”

Mister J leaned down and pressed a sweet kiss against my lips.

“Happy birthday,” he added against my lips.

My eyes widened, I couldn’t believe I had forgotten my own birthday. I giggled and touched his chest, my fingertips grazing over the opening of his blood red, button up shirt as well as the ink on his pale skin. He watched me.

“I’d completely forgotten,” I laughed.

Mister J laughed too, his fingers touching my face before his fingers gripped my chin and he crammed his lips onto mine. He kissed me for what felt like forever but when he pulled away it felt like the kiss had barely been there.

“Have you had breakfast yet, birthday girl?”

I shook my head “no.” He took my hand in his and led me out of the study down to the kitchen. I smiled as he looked at me.

“You look stunning in your new outfit, darling.” Mister J said.

“Thank you.”

In the kitchen, Mister J gestured for me to sit down on the barstool before he started making me breakfast. I watched him cook, it was rare for him to be in the kitchen making our own meals. He’d normally tell one of the cooks to do it.

“Well, aren’t I special,” I giggled

“You are special, darlin’.” He grinned.

When breakfast was cooked, Mister J placed my plate in front of me and stood behind me with his arms around my waist and his head on my shoulder. The food looked amazing. He had made me waffles with fresh blueberries and strawberries on them, scrambled eggs because he knows I hate runny yolk, and some breakfast sausage. It was absolutely perfect.

“You aren’t going to eat?” I asked him, shoving a bite of egg in my mouth.

He grinned and shook his head, “no, I’ll be saving my appetite for later this evening.”

I was about to ask him what he meant but then his hands squeezed my exposed thighs. I knew exactly what he wanted, it’s what I’ve been wanting too. Mister J and I hadn’t had sex the entire time we were together and that was because he had been so busy with so many things that he was tired. That and I was a virgin, so the thought of having sex immediately after we just got together didn’t seem appealing to me. I had been afraid that after I gave him what he wanted, he’d leave. But after awhile, I longed for him to touch every part of my body, to feel his cock inside my cunt, and the sounds he would make while he was fucking me.

Mister J tapped on my head. I hadn’t realized I had froze in deep thought.

“What’s running through that pretty, little head of yours, Athena?” He grinned.

I chewed the remainder of the egg in my mouth before swallowing it. I turned and looked at him, our blue eyes staring into each other. God, he was handsome, no one could convince me otherwise.

“Do you think that we could…uhm…” God this was embarrassing to ask for.

Mister J watched me intently, waiting for me to say what I was gonna say. I gulped, feeling my cheeks turn red.

“Come on, sweetheart,” Mister J teased, “Can’t give you what you want if you don’t use those pretty words of yours.”

A tease. He was a ginormous tease. He knew exactly what I wanted.

“Can we…can we please…please don’t make me say it.”

“Oh, well then you must not really want it.”

Asshole.

Mister J kissed my neck and I shivered as I felt him move along my neck. His hands squeezed my thighs and I moaned. He chuckled.

“Mister J,” I whimpered, “I need you.”

“Need me to what, darlin’?”

“N-need you to fuck me.”

He grinned wider than I have ever seen. He was waiting for this day just as much as I was. I bit my bottom lip and he stared longingly. He chuckled and looked at me.

“I sure can, but you’ll have to wait for tonight after all the fun birthday things we do. Now eat your breakfast, you’ll need the energy for what I have in store for you.”

Mister J walked away from me and headed off probably back to his office. I huffed. He was really making me wait until the end of the day, that was totally rude. I sighed and started finishing my breakfast. After I was done eating, I cleaned my dishes even though the cook insisted that she would do it. I shooed her away, telling her she does enough for me already. When I was finished cleaning my dishes, I headed to a different part of the house but was stopped by Frost.

“Miss Athena,” he said, “Mister J has asked me to tell you to go out to the car, he’ll be waiting for you there.”

“Oh? Are we going to his club?” I asked.

“No, he has something different planned.”

Frost didn’t say another word to me, he just walked away. I tilted my head and went outside to find Mister J waiting in his purple lamborghini. I approached the car, Mister J pushed the passenger’s side open for me like normal and I climbed in, closing the door.

“Ready, princess?”

“Where are we going?” I asked, curiously.

“Thought you might like to go shopping, get yourself whatever you want. You don’t really spend a lot of my money, so I figured this might be a treat. I’ll go with you so I can make sure you’re actually spending a lot.”

“You want me to spend a lot?” I asked, with wide eyes.

“Sweetheart, if it doesn’t say you spent the length of a phone number, I’ll be quite annoyed.”

My eyes widened. He wanted me to spend that much money. I did the math in my head and gasped.

“But the size of a phone number is like a billion dollars.”

“Exactly.”

Mister J started driving towards Gotham. He asked which store I’d like to go to first. I looked down at my phone wondering how the hell I was going to spend a billion dollars or if he was just exaggerating and I didn’t actually have to spend a billion. I perked up. This phone was the same phone I had since I moved to Gotham, Frost had picked it up when he went to get my belongings and kidnap my dad.

“I would like a new phone, if that’s okay.”

“‘Course it’s okay!” He laughed before driving me to a phone store.

People in Gotham didn’t really pay any attention to anyone unless they were being robbed or some other criminal act was being performed, mainly violence. So I wasn’t shocked when Mister J walked around the phone store with me, our hands clasped together, and no one jumped to call the police. I was looking at all the phones that they had on the floor while the Joker watched me. Finally I picked an Iphone 13 in a pink color. The Joker paid for it and we headed back to his lamborghini. For the remainder of the day, Mister J took me shopping at various different stores before taking me out to dinner later that evening. The restaurant he took me to was absolutely stunning. There was a chandelier directly above the entire restaurant that illuminated a soft glow over all the tables. Mister J and I were escorted to a VIP section so that neither one of us could be bothered. I was staring at all of the beautifully, expensive art that hung on the walls, the mahogany brown color that mixed with the egg shell white. The restaurant was gorgeous. We sat down and the waitress came in to take our order. Mister J ordered himself a large steak and I ordered myself a grilled chicken salad. I looked at Mister J.

“Thank you, for all of this today.”

“You’re welcome but the day’s not over and I’ve got one more thing for you.”

He had a mischievous grin on his face and I felt my heart rate speed up. He knew what he was doing, that asshole. Our food came and we started eating while chatting about random things. I couldn’t keep my eyes from staring at him. He was handsome. From his green hair, to his ruby red lips, to his tattoos, and his muscular body. God, he wasn’t just handsome, he was sexy. I slowly chewed my food, it tasted good but I didn’t want it right now. Mister J looked up from his steak.

“You alright, darling?” He asked, grinning.

I didn’t answer him, I just stood up and walked over to him. I climbed into his lap and he looked at me, a grin stretched across his ruby red lips. I smiled back.

“Someone couldn’t wait, hm? Impatient little thing.”

“How can I wait when you’re sitting across from me looking so good,” I point out.

“Well who can argue there, doll?” He laughed, his hands moving to my hips, rubbing small circles against my exposed skin, “I can’t keep my eyes off you either.”

“Then why are we waiting?” I whispered seductively in his ear.

Mister J ran his hands down my hips to my exposed thighs. I shivered from his touch, my eyes wandering down his exposed chest. He always wore his shirts slightly unbuttoned, giving me a perfect view of his pretty, tattooed chest. I was getting so tired of fantasizing about him fucking his cock into me while I touched myself, I needed it. I ran my fingers down his chest before I started unbuttoning his shirt exposing more of his skin. I sighed softly as I leaned down and peppered his tattooed chest with kisses, leaving behind a trail of dusky rose lipstick against his pale skin. Mister J groaned. That sent a shiver up my spine. I loved how deep his groans were even if I’ve only ever heard them when he was frustrated with his work or someone was pissing him off. This was different, this was a groan of pleasure that I was giving him.

“Like that?” I asked, my eyelashes fluttering as I looked up at him.

His hand went to my throat while his other stayed on my thigh. I grin as he moves closer to me.

“You know I do, doll.”

His grip on my thigh and my throat tighten just a little bit; not enough to hurt me but enough so he was holding me tight. I could feel my cunt practically drooling. Mister J slammed his lips against mine and we kissed feverishly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. He wrapped his arms around my waist and I moaned, his tongue running over my bottom lip before slipping it into my mouth. He tasted like steak, obviously, but I could also taste expensive scotch, smoke from his cigars, and just…him. I moaned as I grinded my hips against him, my aching cunt desperate for some type of friction. I was sure I was leaving behind a wet spot on his pants but he didn’t seem to mind. He moved his lips from mine and started kissing and sucking on my neck. I moaned again, my movements becoming rougher as I felt his hard cock through his pants.

“So pretty,” he whispered before he lifted my dress revealing my black, lacy panties. He grinned softly. “Look at you. All ready, wrapping yourself all pretty for me.”

I moaned at his words. He grinned and pushed my dress up more until it was completely off of my body. My black, lacy bra being revealed. He growled, his eyes darkening in desire and lust. He pulled me closer to him, his lips attaching to my own. His tongue ran over my mouth and he groaned. I gasped as he squeezed my breast, my eyes rolling back as I filled his bulge pressed against my cunt.

“Mister J…”

“Ah,” he interrupted, “what’s my name?”

“Daddy,” I corrected; his grin stretching further across his face.

“What can daddy do for you?”

“Fuck me.”

A low chuckle rumbles from his chest as he grips my breast again and I moan. He held me close to his body, his piercing blue eyes staring into my lust filled eyes.

“Such a dirty slut wanting me to fuck you in this restaurant,” he grinned, “you like the idea of the waiter coming back in here seeing me stuff your sweet little pussy, huh?”

His words made my cunt even more wet. I moaned and nodded my head. Whatever got me railed sooner. Mister J pulled me off his lap, making me stand up. He got to his feet too, unclipping my bra with one hand, my breast fully exposed as he tied my wrist behind me back with my bra. The fabric was tight against my skin but I liked it. Once my hands were secured behind my back, Mister J pushed me down to my knees. His shirt was still unbuttoned, but not completely off; he unbuckles his belt and pulls it off before setting it down on his seat. I watched him with doe eyes as he undoes his pants and pulls out his cock. It’s already hard and standing at attention, the tip of his cock already leaking with precum. Drool slips past my lips and he grins.

“Open wide for daddy, baby.”

I don’t even hesitate or think about it, I just open my mouth. He guides his cock into my mouth and I moan as he fills my mouth. He moves his hips slowly, his cock moving in and out of my mouth each thrust getting rougher and rougher as the tip of his cock hits the back of my throat. Mister J groans as he grabs my head pushing himself deeper into my mouth. I felt tears prick at the corner of my eyes, my hands struggling in the restraints he had me in. It was my bra so you’d think the fabric would be easily tearable but not for me. Mister J growled.

“That’s it, baby, suck daddy’s cock.”

The back of my throat made squelching noises as he fucked my face. I felt tears stream down my face but I was enjoying every moment of it. I ran my tongue over every inch of his cock, groaning as I felt every vein that decorated his cock.

“Fuck, you’re so good at this.”

I moaned around him. Mister J grunted before pulling me off his dick, I started gasping for air. He turns me around and pushes the food onto the floor before pushing me down on the table, my back facing him but my ass out. He grabs the fabric of my panties and rips them off, tearing the fabric easily. I moan. He kneeled down and pulled my ass cheeks apart, my eyes rolling back as he gave himself a perfect view of both my cunt and my asshole. Mister J spits on my pussy before devouring it, his tongue and mouth slurping and licking at my soaked cunt. I moaned, pressing my head against the table as he ate me out. My eyes rolled to the back of my head as he nipped my clit.

“Oh fucking god,” I moan out, I grip the side of the table.

Mister J keeps eating me out, his tongue pushing into my cunt. I tighten around his tongue and he growls. I try to move my hands but can’t. My legs started shaking and I knew I was about to cum.

“Daddy,” I moaned out, “I’m gonna c-cum.”

Mister J moved his mouth from my cunt, his chin dripping with my juices. He rubbed my clit harshly, the sound of my arousal echoing in the room mixing with both our heavy breathing. I moaned more as he looked up at me, grinning.

“Come on, baby, cum for daddy.”

“Oh fuck, cumming, daddy.”

My knees buckled as I came hard, my eyes rolling back as a silent scream left my lungs. When I was done cumming, Mister J stood up and picked me up and placed me on the table, spreading my legs. I was still panting from the previous orgasm. Mister J spit on his cock before rubbing it over it and positioning himself in front of my pussy. I propped myself up the best I could so I could see him shove his cock inside me. I moaned as he pushed himself inside me, his cock stretching me out to his width. Mister J groaned.

“Such a tight, fucking pussy, doll.”

“Yeah, daddy?” I moan, he nods his head as he starts moving his hips faster and harder. I groan as he pounds into my cunt. Mister J reached his hand up and grabbed my throat and squeezed tightly as he fucked me. His hips moved at an animalistic speed, the table shaking back and forth, his hand on my throat was the only thing that kept me on the table.

“Holy shit,” I moaned, “you’re so f-fucking deep.”

Mister J grinned as he continued to fuck himself into me. I fall back on the table, my hands still secured behind my back. With each thrust, my breast bounced. Mister J leaned down and sucked on one of my nipples, the speed of his hips never faltering.

“Such a stupid whore,” Mister J growled roughly, sweat collecting on his body. My own body glistened with a small film of sweat. Mister J grabbed one of my legs and threw it over his shoulder allowing him to go deeper. My eyes rolled back and drool started spilling from my lips and collecting on the table I was one. Mister J watched me, a grin on his face as he continued to move his hips roughly. My heart was hammering inside my chest as adrenaline and pleasure soaked every inch of my nerves. I couldn’t focus on anything else, just the way he cock stretched me out and the sounds coming from my wet cunt each time he drilled himself into me.

“Look at that,” Mister J grinned, “now we’re getting somewhere.”

My entire body was buzzing and I was approaching my climax once again. I moaned and arched my back the best I could with my hands behind my back. The fabric of my bra rubbed my wrist raw but I didn’t care.

“G-gonna cum,” I managed to pant out.

“Panting?” The Joker laughed, “like a bitch in heat. You wanna cum, doll, beg me for it.”

His words were so lewd, it was only gonna get more intense from here. I moaned and looked up at Mister J the best I could through teary eyes. I wasn’t crying from pain, but from pleasure.

“Please, daddy, wanna cum.” I whimper.

He laughs. “You can do better than that, baby. Beg daddy and I’ll let you make a pretty mess on my cock.”

“Daddy!” I moaned louder as he rubbed my clit at the same time as he fucked me, “f-fuck, please, please let me cum. Need it, need it so fucking bad. Wanna cum, please, please.” I didn’t care if the words made sense or anything, I just needed to cum. Mister J reached down and grabbed by my neck with his free hand and yanked me closer to him, his cock still working its magic. I moaned again.

“Cum.” It was an order. Either I cum now or not at all. So I came hard all over his cock, my legs shaking and my eyes rolling back. I might have looked like the main character from the exorcist. A scream was ripped from my lungs as my juices coated every inch of his cock, my pussy squeezing around him. He groaned too but didn’t stop. Instead, he pulled me up and sat down on his seat.

“Ride me.”

“T-tired.”

“Don’t think so, doll, you wanted to be an impatient brat, ride me.”

I moved myself up and down on his cock. His hands were on my hips as I bounced up and down. My hair bounced with the movement. My sweaty skin caused some strands to stick to me.

“That’s it. Ride daddy.”

“L-legs getting tired, daddy.”

Mister J looked up at me and smacked my face, not enough to physically cause me pain but enough to tell me that he didn’t care. He was right, I wanted this now and was too impatient to wait when I got home. There was a knock on the door and I covered my mouth. Mister J laughed and pulled my hand down.

“What is it?” He laughed.

The door opened and the waiter walked in. His eyes practically popped out of his head when he saw me riding the Joker’s cock. Mister J pulled me off of him and bent me over the table.

“W-was just coming to check on you two,” the waiter stuttered out, I could see the growing tent in his pants.

“Hold on a second, kid,” Mister J said, he removed one of his golden chains and wrapped it around my neck before pulling on it. Not tight but enough for the cool metal to dig into my hot skin. He slammed himself in from behind and I moaned out again. By now I knew, without actually seeing, that I was completely fucked out. The waiter’s eyes met mine, which were teary eyed and my eyeliner and mascara probably smudged to hell.

“See that, kid. This dumb whore likes that you’re watching her get fucked. Her pussy is practically suffocating my cock.”

The waiter couldn’t move or say anything, he just stood there and watched; his mouth slightly open.

“Oh my fucking…” I couldn’t even finish my sentence.

“What a dumb slut,” Mister J laughed, “gonna cum on my dick again in front of this man?”

“Yes daddy.”

“Then let’s see it baby. Give this man a show.”

I moaned louder this time as I came hard on his cock for the second time, this being a total of three orgasms in I don’t know how long. Were we here for an hour, two, maybe it was closing time and that’s why the waiter came to check on us. Mister J rubbed my clit quickly and I felt a different type of pressure before I released and ended up squirting for the first time.

“Ohhh, fuck,” I cry out.

In front of me, the waiter now had a wet spot on his pants meaning he probably came too. Mister J smacked my ass roughly before grabbing it and continued to fuck himself into me.

“Gonna breed this cunt, baby, ready?”

I nod vigorously, still moaning and panting. Mister J fucked himself into my cunt a few more times before he growled and released his cum into my pussy. My eyes rolled back as I felt his entire seed push all the way inside me, deep. Mister J rutted against me, groaning as he watched my greedy pussy take all his cum before he pulled out. He zips himself back up and looks at the waiter.

“Bring the check.”

“Y-yes sir.” The waiter ran off and Mister J helped me to my feet.

He untied my hands from my bra and grinned down at me.

“Get dressed doll, sorry about your panties and bra. Looks like you’ll have to walk out of here with my cum running down your leg.”

He wasn’t actually sorry but I didn’t mind. In fact, I moaned at the thought. He wrapped his arms around me.

“Happy birthday, sweetheart. Let’s get home so I can rough you up some more.”

I giggled and nodded as I got dressed. Mister J paid for the food that we didn’t eat, the waiter refused to make eye contact with either one of us, and we left. I was excited to see what more he had in store for me when we got home.

Tags: @w4nt-h1s-d1ck

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drabbles-mc · 9 months ago

Text

Hands All Over

Rick Flag x F!Reader

Based on the request from @beardburnsupersoldiers: could you do #11 (“I bet you think you’re real cute letting them put their hands all over you. We’ll see how cute you look later when I get you home.”) with Rick Flag??? (Prompt is from This List)

Warnings: 18+, language, smut, jealous Rick

Word Count: 5.4k

A/N: my requests are closed but i have been thinking about this in the best way ever since you sent it in and i finally finished it tonight so I'm sending it out into the universe. I'm forever unwell about this man but i hope you enjoy!!!! xo (as always this is unbeta'd af but it's made with love)

You were purposely ignoring the pissed off look on Rick’s face as he stared at you from across the lot. It was early still. The guards hadn’t even rounded up everyone that the two of you needed from Belle Reeve yet. The usual suspects had been brought out first, people they knew weren’t going to put up much of a fight even if they wanted to. It was a short list, and seemed to get shorter all the time whether it was because they kept shaving years off people’s sentences, or because there were almost always a couple team members who didn’t make it home at the end of a mission. Turnover was constant, but it wasn’t as though Belle Reeve was ever going to run out of inmates.

Regardless, it left you and Rick out in the lot with Harley, Peacemaker, and Captain Boomerang. Over the next few minutes you were sure that others would slowly start to trickle out, people with no real clue about what they were getting roped into.

The reason that Rick was giving you the glare was two-fold—he was pissed off about what he was seeing, and he was also pissed off that he couldn’t even try to say anything about it. The first part was your fault, really. But the second part? That was just as much on Rick as it was on you. Maybe if you two had taken the time to ever actually talk about what your deal was, situations like this wouldn’t have him reacting quite so obviously. As it stood, Rick was too stubborn to start the conversation and you enjoyed stirring the pot too much to start it yourself.

So, there you were, leaning back against the transport vehicle you and Rick would be loading everyone into soon enough. Your back was braced against it, one boot on the ground, the other resting back flat against the large tire. Your arms were crossed in front of you as you looked at Boomerang. He was closely mirroring your stance as he stood beside you. You might’ve been vaguely aware of how close he was standing, but judging by the clench in Rick’s jaw it was just about the only thing that he was aware of.

Boomerang had always been a little more comfortable around you than he should’ve been. You figured out pretty quickly after meeting him that trying to fight him on it all the time was not only exhausting, but it wasn’t effective. So along the way the two of you found your middle-ground. You were fine with it, the banter and jokes that definitely wouldn’t be workplace appropriate at any other job, but even without looking at Rick when it happened you knew that he wasn’t a fan.

“C’mon.” Boomer nudged his shoulder against yours. “How many more missions till I can take you out?”

You laughed and rolled your eyes. “Bold of you to assume that the only reason you can’t take me out is because you’re currently in prison.”

He pretended to be offended and hurt by the comment. “That ain’t very nice, now is it?” He paused as you laughed. “Got some boyfriend on the outside, then?”

Turning your head to look at him, you said, “Why would I have to—”

He held his hands up in mock surrender. “Or a girlfriend. Don’t matter.”

You chuckled. “I never said any of that.”

He stepped away from the truck. Turning on his heel, he stood so that he was facing you head-on. “By the time I’m outta here, sweetheart, I’ll win you over.”

Even though you knew it wasn’t ever going to happen, you still found yourself smirking at the concept of him trying to woo you. Whatever that meant to him. “Always good to have a goal.”

There were a few beats of silence as he looked around the lot. You could tell that he was starting to get a little antsy, Harley too from the sounds of it as she chattered away at one of the new recruits that had been brought out. This was always the longest part. Briefing everyone was quick, and the rides to the mission locations went by fast because of the commentary flying around amongst everyone. Waiting for everyone to get chipped and brought out got to be a drag after a while.

Boomer was feeling it, pulling out one of his boomerangs and fiddling with it passively in his hand the way a child would fuss with a toy. Arms crossed over your chest, you nodded towards the item in his hand. “Not getting that out just because I said you couldn’t take me out, right?”

His grin split wide enough to catch the glint off his gold tooth. “’Course not.” He fiddled with it for another second longer before pointing at you with it. “Ever used one’a these?” You shook your head and he switched so that it was laying flat in his upturned palm, hand out to you like a peace offering. “Wanna try?”

“Boomer—”

“Give it a shot! ‘s the worst that could happen? We’re the Suicide Squad anyway, right?”

No matter what your rebuttal was, it wasn’t going to be good enough for him. Using your foot that was braced against the tire, you pushed off the side of the truck. “Fine. Only because I know I’ll never hear the end of it from you.”

He was practically cackling as he set it in your hand. “Might make a bad guy outta you yet.”

The two of you weren’t even being all that loud but the words were grating against Rick’s ears halfway across the lot like he was trapped in an echo chamber. The internal conflict of enjoying the sound of your laughter versus knowing that you were laughing at something that Harkness said had him rooted to the spot. If he clenched his jaw any tighter he was liable to chip a tooth.

First it was listening to the two of you shooting comments back and forth, your indirect denial of having someone on the outside. He was frustrated with that even though deep down he knew that even if you’d said you were with someone, it wouldn’t have stopped Boomerang. Deeper down still, he knew that he’d never said anything to you about the relationship between the two of you, but it was easier for him in that moment to forget that small detail.

That was frustrating enough, but then he saw the way that Boomer was so quick to put his hands on yours, how comfortable he was shifting the two of you so that he was standing behind you. It didn’t matter that you wouldn’t take the man seriously in a million years, that no matter the innuendo or the offer he wasn’t ever going to win you over. In that moment, Harkness was closer to you at work than Rick ever would be. And you were smiling and laughing about it.

Not nearly soon enough, the last of this round’s Task Force X were brought out to the yard. You’d managed to get one mildly successful boomerang throw in, and Rick had stopped just short of giving himself an aneurysm.

“Alright,” he barked, more anger in his words than necessary as he walked towards the truck, “everyone load up. We’ll brief on the way.”

You stood back watching as they all filed in. There were murmurs, quick exchanges as everyone tried to get situated in the cramped space. You tried to stifle your chuckles as you heard Harley riling everyone up as they got strapped in.

Unsurprisingly, Boomerang was bringing up the back of the line. Before stepping up into the vehicle, he stopped right beside you. You could feel the humor dripping off his words as he motioned for you to get in before him. “Beauty befor—”

Rick gave him a harsh shove between his shoulder blades, cutting him off in the process. “Get in the fuckin’ truck,” he grit out.

Boomerang’s entire face contorted in annoyance and offense for a moment. He looked over his shoulder at you as he climbed into the vehicle. “When’re you gonna stop lettin’ that one tag along?” He gestured to Rick.

Rick’s brows were pinched together as tight as you’d ever seen them. “Harkness.”

It was all that had to be said. He slipped into the back of the transport with everyone else. You were still looking at the now-empty door, unaware of the look that Rick was now giving to you. There were plenty of things that he wanted to say to you, do to you, right there in that moment just to prove a point but he couldn’t.

You started to speak. “So how—”

All the words flew right out of your head as Rick’s hand clamped tightly down onto your shoulder. Catching you off-guard he easily pushed you, pinning you between him and the side of the truck. One of his legs was slotted between yours. He was leaning in close enough for you to feel his breath against your skin when he spoke.

His voice was painfully low. “I bet you think you’re real cute letting him put his hands all over you. We’ll see how cute you look later when I get you home.”

You were so off-kilter that you couldn’t even come up with the witty responses that you were in the habit of giving him. He’d never put himself in such a close position with you at work before. You knew him well enough to know that being friendly with Boomerang would get under his skin a little bit. If only you’d known how much—you would’ve done it a hell of a lot sooner.

The digging of his fingertips even through your shirt had you locked in place. It was exciting as it was nerve-wracking, especially since there was a truckload of prisoners just a mere flap of metal away from you. You and Rick had always had different definitions of the term reckless, and this was about as reckless as it got for him. He tried so hard not to let his personal life bleed into the job, and yet here he was. You loved knowing that you could have this effect on him if you tried, even if it was making your knees nearly knock together in the moment.

It could’ve only been a couple seconds that had passed, but you felt like the silence had been stretching on infinitely when you finally managed to try and speak up. “I don’t—”

“You do,” he cut you off. There was the slightest twitch in his hand on your shoulder, a clue that he wanted to put it somewhere else but he stopped himself. Not feeling quite reckless enough for that yet.

“I—”

His voice seemed to drop even lower in volume, not that it dulled the sharp edges of what he was saying to you. “Don’t play dumb now.” He finally released you and stepped back. A professional amount of space existed between you once more. “Let’s go.” He started to walk towards the driver’s side. “We got shit to do.”

You gave yourself until the door on the other side of the vehicle opened. Then you took a deep breath and got yourself swung up into the passenger seat. There were bigger things to worry about for now, and you decided that those bigger things were why you still felt a slight shaking in your legs.

There was never such a thing as a simple mission with Task Force X. Even when things were pitched to you and Rick as easy, or simple, or in-and-out missions, they never seemed to play out that way. You chalked it up to the squad, and also to Waller never giving anyone a straight answer about anything. That usually covered your bases.

This time you had the additional layer of problems stemming from Rick’s attitude for the day. He wasn’t ever warm and fuzzy with the team, but the last time you saw him walking around with such a noticeable chip on his shoulder was back in the days of Midway City. Only this time his frustration wasn’t about the whole team, it was about one team member in particular. Or two, if you included yourself in the count.

Your team didn’t have the luxury of ascribing to the, “no man left behind,” mentality. But even so, it didn’t mean that no one could try at all. And who knows, maybe if someone who wasn’t Harkness had taken a bullet to the thigh, Rick would’ve reacted differently. You didn’t get to find out.

Rick had brushed past him, determined to get to get everything over as quickly as possible. His lack of concern was met with a slew of angry, vulgar remarks from Boomerang, and perhaps rightfully so. You stopped to at least help the man get to his feet, even if you weren’t going to be carrying him or acting as a human crutch for the rest of the mission.

“Flag,” you chastised as you caught up to him.

“What?” he snapped back, matching your tone.

You let your voice drop to just above a whisper. Loud enough for him to hear over everything happening around the two of you, but not so loud that the rest of the team with you was going to catch it.

“You said we’ll sort it at home, so let’s sort it at home.”

He shook his head. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No? So you’re trying to tell me that there’s nothing different about—”

“That’s exactly what I’m tellin’ you.”

The sound of gunfire up ahead stopped your conversation then and there. You knew that once the chaos had died down, the two of you would get right back into it. There were just more pressing matters to deal with at the moment, like the people pointing their guns at you.

There were no other major injuries to anyone else on the team. A few bumps and scrapes but it looked like Boomerang was the only one who was going to be taking a trip to the medical wing. He would’ve been looking forward to that if it wasn’t currently being preceded by Peacemaker carrying him back to the transport vehicle. No matter how much he struggled and swore, he wasn’t able to break free. It was a comical sight, seeing him draped over Peacemaker’s shoulder—everyone else was getting a kick out of it even if Boomerang wasn’t. Him and Rick.

Rick didn’t say a single word to you the entire drive back. Even when everyone was getting unloaded and sent back to their cells, it felt like he hadn’t even done so much as look at you. It was something that any other day you wouldn’t have noticed, because that’s just how it was when you were both working. But it felt different this time, tense in a way that it didn’t used to be.

He only spoke to you in the parking lot by your cars because you asked him a question that he couldn’t give a yes or no answer to. He didn’t even look at you as he answered it, instead looking down as he dug his keys out of his pocket.

“Yours or mine?” you asked.

“Yours.”

You waited for follow-up commentary that never came. You waited for him to pick back up the argument from earlier, or for him to reignite the jealous streak that he’d had going earlier still. But he gave you nothing as he unlocked the doors to his pickup.

With a roll of your eyes, you followed suit and got into your own car as well. If he wanted to keep stewing on all of this until you both got back to your place, you’d let him. You didn’t bother waiting for him as you peeled out of the parking lot and made your way home. It wasn’t as though he would be lagging that far behind you.

You’d just stepped into the shower at your apartment when you heard the heavy sound of his boots on the floor. You heard them pause outside the bathroom door, and for a moment you found yourself holding your breath and waiting to see if he was going to come in with you. The hesitation had you thinking that he was thinking about doing just that. But then the footsteps continued. The breath you’d been holding came out as a disappointed sigh.

When you were done with your shower, you weren’t expecting to walk into your bedroom to find Rick sitting on the edge of the bed, still dressed in his work save for his boots that were set just off to the side of him, but there he was. His hands were wrapped around the edge of the mattress, head tilted down as he stared at the floor.

“Shower’s yours if you want it,” you said, letting it announce your presence in the process.

That got him to look up at you. His expression wasn’t giving much of anything away, but as his eyes raked up and down your body you caught the way that his jaw clenched. His fingers gripped onto the blanket that covered your mattress just a little tighter as he took in the sight of the stray droplets of water still clinging to your shoulders and neck. Your skin warmed at the realization.

Seeing that he made no move to get up, you walked over to him. You stood between his legs, the rough fabric of his cargo pants a stark contrast to the softness of you skin, legs left exposed by the towel wrapped around you that barely reached the tops of your thighs. He swallowed hard, eyes crawling their way up your body to your face. Now he was in the position of having to look up at you, a position he didn’t find himself in very often. Even though his eyes gave him away, he tried to keep his unbothered façade in place.

“Still not talking to me, then? Came over just to give me the silent treatment in my own home?”

He remained silent, and you were wondering if it was because he was stringing together what it was that he wanted to say, or if he just couldn’t get the words out. Either way, you were painfully curious as to what was going to happen next.

“C’mon,” there was a playful lilt to your tone as you went to cup his face with your hand, “don’t—”

You stopped yourself short when he reached up and grabbed tightly onto your wrist. It didn’t hurt. He’d never hurt you. But his grip was tight enough to prove a point. Your jaw snapped shut as he held onto you, preventing and continuing to keep you from being able to touch his face.

“He doesn’t get to touch you like that,” he finally said, each word spoken low and deep.

His voice, his words, the look on his face, it all sent a wave of chills over your body. The same feeling you had outside the transport earlier, that feeling of being rooted to the ground beneath you, came right back. You couldn’t even bring yourself to reach out and touch him with your other hand.

Your voice came out quieter than you planned. “It wasn’t…” You trailed off as he lowered your hand that he was holding, his grip loosening off your wrist as he started to slide his hand up the bare skin of your arm until it was on your shoulder.

His fingers curled over the curve of your shoulder. “No one gets to touch you like that.”

You took a breath, determined to get a full sentence out this time. “I guess I didn’t think it would bother you so much.”

Whatever snarky, angry response you had been gearing up for, he didn’t deliver. Instead, he pulled you closer, your small step turning into a stumble as your hands landed on his shoulders to brace yourself. His hands instantly went to your waist, fingers digging into the plush fabric of the towel that was wrapped around you. He didn’t break his gaze the entire time.

His tone was even, almost dangerously so. “It did.”

The stubborn part of you was drawing in a breath to tell him that you weren’t sorry, that you weren’t going to apologize, that maybe if he’d just taken the time to talk to you about how he felt or what all of this was maybe the two of you wouldn’t be in this situation. But before you could even get yourself to utter the first syllable, he tightened his grip on your hips and quickly turned the both of you so that you landed on your back on the bed with a surprised yelp.

It took him no time at all to move you both so that you were in the center of the bed. One hand firmly cupped your jaw as he pinned his lips to yours in a heated kiss, a kiss that had you all but melting into the comforter of your bed. Your palms flattened against the planes of muscle across his chest for the briefest moment before you balled the fabric of his shirt into your fists. You pulled him closer to you, as tight as you could manage as you laid beneath him.

He gave into it for a moment as his tongue slipped past your lips into your mouth. You moaned at the sensation, his tongue on yours, the way the tips of his fingers were starting to press harder into your jaw. You were about to loop your legs around his waist, lock yourself to him, when he pulled away from you.

You were gasping for breath, fingers still gripping his shirt as he pulled back. Bringing his hand away from your jaw, he brought both hands to the top edge of the towel you were wearing. His fingers wrapped around the hem of it, he finally pried his gaze away from your face. He peeled the towel open, letting both sides of it fall away from you, leaving you completely exposed. His tongue ran along his bottom lip as he drank in the sight of you lying beneath him.

The rise of his chest as he pulled in a deep breath was impossible to miss. Your hands moved from his chest up to the sides of his neck, fingers interlocking at the nape of it as you pulled him back down into another kiss. He gave in without a fight, leaning his body weight onto you as he kissed you, hands racing down your sides, of your hips and onto your thighs.

His lips strayed from yours, dragging along to your jaw and down to your neck, leaving small, quick nips along the way. He moved down to your chest, lips and tongue teasing as they traveled over your breasts, pulling one taut nipple into his mouth and sucking on it in a way that had you whimpering and squirming in pleasure beneath him before he moved and repeated the process with the other.

“Rick,” his name fell from your lips, needy and breathless as you tangled your fingers into his hair. It was the only thing you could get yourself to say as he sucked a mark into the plush skin of your breast.

He kissed his way down your stomach, peppering a trail of kisses across your hips before moving down to your thighs. His teeth grazed along the soft, sensitive skin on the insides of your legs, the sensation making you drape your legs over his shoulders out of pure instinct.

His lips grazed over your folds, enough to feel how wet you were, not enough to give you any relief because of it. You tried to lift your hips and he immediately slid his arms and placed his hands so that they were pinning your hips to the bed once more. You whined, hands tugging at his hair.

Then you felt his tongue running up your slit, teasing you in a way that had you shuddering beneath him. You tried to pull him closer with no success, resigning yourself to his whim now. He might not have been able to say or do anything before, but he was the one in control now.

He kissed your core, tongue darting out until he switched and wrapped his lips around your clit. You moaned as his tongue ran over the nerves, causing your thighs to clamp around either side of his head.

“Fuck, Rick,” you moaned, grip on his hair loosening just enough to lightly drag your fingernails along his scalp. “Don’t stop.”

You felt one of his hands move from your hip and for a moment you were worried that he was going to stop just because you had asked him not to. You lifted your head up off the mattress, looking down at the sight of him nestled between your thighs. The way he looked had the breath getting caught in the back of your throat. Then he opened his eyes, looking up at you with his mouth still pressed to your core. You opened your mouth to try and say something when you felt two of his fingers pressing lightly against your slit. He covered them with your slick before pushing them into you, not breaking his eye contact with you as he did. The moan you let out had him tightening his grip on your hip, sucking harder on your clit as you writhed beneath his touch.

When he felt the way your thighs began to tremble, starting to clench tighter around him, he picked up the pace even more. Even though it was muffled, he could still hear the string of curses you let out the closer you got to your climax, the desperate way you said his name as you begged him to make you cum.

Seconds later your walls tightened around his fingers, your hips bucking up off the bed as you came. He worked you through it, his fingers and lips coated in your release as he refused to let up. He kept going even when your hands were pushing his shoulders, whining from the overstimulation. Your legs trembled as they hung limply over his shoulders, unable to muster up the strength to pull him closer or push him away.

You let out a trembling breath when he pulled his fingers out of you. He pressed one more kiss to the inside of your thigh before crawling his way back up your body. Without a beat of hesitation he caught your lips with his, tongue instantly running over yours allowing you to taste yourself off of him.

The friction of the rough fabric of his pants against your sensitive, naked core had you whining into his mouth as he kissed you. Still, instead of pushing him away, you started to undo his belt buckle. The second he pressed his body flush to yours again you’d felt how hard he was. Now you just wanted him inside you.

Undoing the button and zipper on his pants, wasted no time pushing both his pants and his underwear down off his hips in one motion. Rick barely took the time to kick them the rest of the way off before pushing into you.

The low moan of pleasure that he let out turned into your name as he bottomed out inside you. He pressed a harsh, needy kiss to your lips before letting his head drop into the crook of your neck. He gave you a couple long, slow thrusts to adjust before picking up the pace in a way that communicated all of his desperation for you. Your nails sank into his shoulders as he pounded into you, just looking for something to keep you tethered as you started to see stars behind your eyes all over again.

He nipped at your neck and shoulder as he pulled your legs so that they were looped tighter around him. He buried himself inside you, coaxing you along when you whimpered out that you were going to cum again. He pressed a kiss right below your ear, the praise he was whispering to you, calling you his, was enough to send you tumbling over the edge. He fucked you through your orgasm, his thrusts beginning to falter as he felt your walls clenching around him. A few more sharp snaps of his hips had him spilling inside you.

He collapsed against you, fighting to catch his breath as his hear rested against your chest. He could hear the fast beat of your heart against his ear, and you could feel the quick breaths he was taking as he looped his arms around you. His touch was soft, gentle in a way it hadn’t been just moments before.

You rested one hand on the back of his head, the other between his shoulder blades. You idly toyed with strands of his hair as you let your eyes close. Neither of you said anything for a few minutes, instead choosing to revel in the silence and the closeness that came with it. It also gave you each a little while longer to catch your breath.

Eyes still closed, you spoke up, your voice soft but light. “So, you wanna talk about it?” you asked with a quiet laugh.

He was still laying on your chest. You didn’t know for sure but you were willing to bet that his eyes were closed too. “About what?” he replied in a half-mumble.

You dragged your fingers up and down his spine, pressing through his shirt. “Oh, so we’re just going to pretend you haven’t been angry and jealous all day? Gonna pretend that’s not where this came from?” You kept your tone upbeat enough so that it wouldn’t descend into an argument. That wasn’t what you were looking for.

It worked, too, because it got him to let out a laugh. “Wasn’t all day.”

You shook your head, would’ve rolled your eyes if they were open. “You’re such a pain.”

“And you’re not?” he joked right back. He lifted his head to look at you, which got you to open your eyes. “You gonna try and sit there and pretend you weren’t doing that shit to get under my skin?”

You smirked, giving a half-hearted shrug. “I didn’t think you’d care.”

“Why wouldn’t—”

“Oh, c’mon, Rick. We’ve been doing this song and dance for how long now? And we…you never…” You reached up to drag your hands down your face. “We’ve never talked about it. I figured that was your nice way of saying…you know.”

He frowned at that. “Oh.”

You laughed, letting your head drop back to the mattress again. “Good talk.”

He chuckled, pulling away from you just enough so that he could shift and lay beside you. It was easier to look at you that way as he propped his elbow and rested his head in the palm of his hand. “I never said anythin’ because I figured you knew.”

You rolled onto your side to face him. “Knew what?”

His other hand tenderly grazed along your cheek, the callouses on his fingers not feeling harsh in the slightest. “How I feel about you.”

You leaned into his touch. “I’m not a mind reader, you know,” you said with a small laugh. “And, you know,” you placed your hand over his, “you’re not exactly the most open book.”

He cracked a small grin. “No?”

You laughed. “No.”

He was still smiling as he dragged the pad of his thumb along your cheek. “Well, now you know.”

You nodded. “Now I know.”

He pulled you in close to him, tucking your head beneath his chin. You settled into him with ease, the way you had so many times before. He held you tight enough so that you could feel his heartbeat thudding against the side of your face.

He pressed a lazy kiss to the top of your head before saying, “Harkness ever puts a hand on you again though, I’m chopping the fuckin’ thing off.”

You laughed, patting his chest in a joking, reassuring manner. “Sure you are.”

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