#suicide meme
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"mithrun is the only real monsterfucker in dungeon meshi" is objectively the funniest bit you can get out of his everything, but in all seriousness i think his attraction to his love interest is deliberately overstated—and that makes sense, because romantic jealousy is a classic and digestible motive, which is explicitly what kabru was aiming for in condensing mithrun's backstory, and also because until chapter 94, mithrun wasn't willing to admit to the true nature of his desires.
but because romantic envy is both classic and digestible, it probably isn’t a unique enough or complicated enough desire to tempt a demon’s appetite. mithrun’s wish, as far as we can figure from kabru’s reduced retelling, was to have a life in which he had never become one of the canaries, and that carries like 3857 implications and desires within it. that’s delicious. his love interest acts as sort of a red herring to his motivation for making it, though. (side note: i'm saying "love interest" here because, keeping in mind that i barely speak japanese on a good day anymore, "想い人" is something i'd usually take as just kind of an old-fashioned and romantic way to refer to a lover, but in context i wonder if both the connotation of yearning and the vagueness are intentional, and i think this phrasing gets those aspects of it more effectively. anyway.)
mithrun considered his love interest to be untrustworthy. there was a minute where i thought that comment might be about a similar-looking elf (yugin, one of his squad members), but comparing the two…
the "sketchy" arrow is definitely referring to the elf we know as his love interest—the bangs go toward her right, she only has the one forehead ornament, and, most notably, her ears aren't notched.
every time she’s given a full-body depiction in his dungeon, she’s drawn as a chimera, with the body of a snake from the waist down. (side note: the “what if a dungeon has chimeras before reaching level 4?”/“then the dungeon lord is unstable” exchange just being mithrun grilling his past self alive is so funny. he’s so. but anyway) there are a couple things about this.
first, the snake part of the chimera appears to be modeled after some species of coral snake mimic
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which, in the biology-for-fun manga, i… doubt is a coincidence, especially with the added context of the “untrustworthy” comment. the dungeon’s conjured illusion of mithrun’s love interest was a harmless copycat of a venomous original. for whatever reason, he felt this person was a threat and made up a "safe" version of her to be in a relationship with, and while it’s definitely possible to be attracted to or even love someone you find to be toxic and/or intimidating, when you take that into consideration alongside the configuration of her body, you get some interesting implications.
which brings us to our second point: if we assume that mithrun was not in fact fucking a snake, then sexual attraction, at least, was so far removed from his idea of a relationship with this person that he did not even bother to keep her dungeon copy human enough to maintain the illusion of the option of a sexual relationship. this is somewhat echoed in the depictions of their interactions, which also imply a frankly unexpected romantic distance. she kisses his cheek and he doesn't seem to react; she's at the edge of a narrow bed with only one set of pillows, on top of his blankets while he's underneath them.
the kiss is particularly interesting because it seems to contrast the text. kabru's narration tells us this was everything mithrun could have asked for, but mithrun is there looking unreadable to pensive, likely because this is right before the panel that makes it clear things in the dungeon are beginning to go wrong.
walking through this backwards for a minute, we have the physical barrier of his bedding and the spatial separation inherent in a bed made for one person, the emotional barrier of his mounting anxiety getting in the way of his ability to enjoy the affection he sought, and... the snake, which historically carries the connotation of temptation, yes, but also mistrust, barring physical intimacy. okay. ok. if a dungeon reflects the mentality of its lord, all of this might suggest that mithrun was not able to have any real desire for a relationship with this person. his unwillingness to be vulnerable or let another person in was insurmountable. but in that case, why was she such a focal point that she remained to the end, after his dungeon had stopped creating iterations of his friends to come and visit him? why would he get so upset over her meeting with his brother that he became lord of a dungeon about it?
well. mithrun's brother was also interested in her, probably genuinely. and mithrun had to win.
you have an older brother who your parents completely ignore, probably in part because he is chronically ill/disabled and almost definitely in part because he received a ton of recessive traits that resulted in rumors that he was an illegitimate child. you are aware, most likely because those same parents fucking told you, that you actually are an illegitimate child. but they keep you around because you had the good fortune of looking just like your mother. what can that possibly teach you but that you, like your brother, are disposable?
it's utterly unsurprising that mithrun, under these circumstances, developed a pathological need to be better than everyone around him. people don't keep you otherwise. i'd argue this is also why he says he looked down on everyone he knew while milsiril claims his dungeon reeked of feelings of inferiority—he sought out people's worst traits and prioritized them in his mind to protect his already extremely fragile sense of self-worth, and all the while he tried to be as likable and high-performing as he possibly could be. his parents disposed of him anyway, but even then he tried to keep up the performance. he was kind to everyone. he never once lost to a dungeon.
when he saw his "love interest" meeting up with his brother, what he saw was himself being replaced by a person his parents had always treated as worthless, and if that was what they thought of the child they'd kept, what value could anyone possibly see in the bastard they'd given away to die? mithrun and kabru tell the story like he wanted to win this unnamed elf's heart, but it was never about being with her. it was about cementing his worth, proving that he didn't deserve to be thrown away.
and so it's particularly cruel that his demon discarded him, too. but maybe it's also particularly gentle that, in the end, there was someone who refused to even consider giving up on him.
kui laid it out in three panels better than i could hope to.
yeah. it's love. you wanted to be loved, even when the only way you were able to understand it was through the desire to be wanted, and you wanted that so badly that the idea of being consumed felt like the promise of finally mattering to someone.
#dungeon meshi spoilers#mithrun#dungeon meshi#this has been rotating for a while but i wanted to check my evidence before getting into it thanks user angelspenance for posting that meme#half of this is just the text and the other half i'm sure has been said before but it's making my brain [radio static] so here this is#someone did for sure mention this but i do find it very cute that in his fucked up conjured world meant to portray his ideal reality#his teammates came to visit him. like part of the fantasy was then explicitly that they cared about him and were his friends. even though#he says he tried to see the worst in them.#hm it does feel important to note that i do also believe 100% in mithrun suicidality--his desire to be eaten does seem to focus a lot on#wanting it to be Over. wanting not to be left incomplete and empty anymore.#but that loops back around a bit to the hole in your heart that appears when you feel unloved. it's many things and the same thing at once#snakes#long post#severe problems#meshy
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if you hold me without hurting me
You'll be the first who ever did‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
#lana del rey#coquette#aesthetic#art#cute#poetry#this is what makes us girls#love#lizzy grant#hell is a teenage girl#lily rose depp#born to die#ballerina#90s fashion#ballet#black and white#cecilia lisbon#cinammon girl#coquette girl#coquette dollete#meme#coney island queen#lana is our queen#sparkle jump rope queen#elizabeth woolridge grant#elizabeth grant#female experience#female rage#virgin mary#the virgin suicides
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Just relapsed after 6 months
#girlblogging#girlblogger#whisper girl#real#tw sh related#female hysteria#relatable#relatable memes#born to die#tw selfhate#tw self destructive behavior#the feminine urge#the virgin suicides#depressing shit#tw depressing stuff#depressing memes#self destruction#su1c1d3#self deprecating humor#tw depressing thoughts#tw depressive#bpd problems#bpd vent#actually bpd#borderline personality disorder#mentally unstable#vent blog#vent post#mental illness#actually mentally ill
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#Kill him girl#I’ll help you hide the body#meme#funny#haha#funny memes#humor#lol#memes#funny shit#funny post#weird memes#harley quinn#harleen quinzel#suicide squad
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#girlblogging#lana del rey#sadgirl#coquette#oldermen#lizzy grant#this is what makes us girls#the virgin suicides#ultraviolence#current mood#tumblr memes#dollette#dilfism
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#@ vamparadise ⁺ ♱ ˖#sweet like cinnamon#girlblogging#lana del rey#girlhood#hell is a teenage girl#bambi doe#dark coquette#female rage#girly stuff#light coquette#lux lisbon#the virgin suicides#radio lana del rey#cinnamon girl#female hysteria#whisper girl#me coded#angelcore#fawn angel#female insanity#messy girl#lizzy grant#girl memes#relatable#dni men#men dni#weirdos#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#just girly thoughts
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Okay sorry to triple post ISAT in one night but I've been possessed by the meme demons
#ISAT#In Stars and Time#ISAT Spoilers#In Stars and Time Spoilers#ISAT Memes#Starspost#Fandom Starspost#CW Suicide/Self-Harm#If you squint. Lightly referenced.#RIP Guadeloupe you died for our sins
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that's how the circus gothica episode went right?
(original img under cut ^^)
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#sorry guys only low quality meme works#atleast until i figure out something cool to draw#this is so bad#jumps off a cliff but in a cool non-suicidal way#danny phantom#my art#fun news dp is now my second most posted about fandom#only surpassed by lmk
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hangout sesh 💞
#pretty4lifeee#girl memes#girlblogging#coquette#girlhood#girl things#this is what makes us girls#female hysteria#cassie skins#nina sayers#jennifers body#pinkie pie#lana del rey#layla buffalo 66#lux lisbon#coquette angel#black swan#the virgin suicides#hell is a teenage girl#obviously doctor you've never been a 13 year old girl#skins uk
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I love deep space nine because some episodes are like "ooohhhh wee waaacky fun times on the promenade" and other episodes are like "let's torture miles o'brien"
#ds9#deep space nine#miles o'brien#ds9 hard times#what the fuck is this episode guys.#what the fukc#it came outa nowhere and its literally just “lets put obrien in the tortue nexus”#he straight up tries to commit SUICIDE??? ON SCREEN???#“I repaid kindness with blood.” - miles o'brien#what the actual fuck man#he straight up tells bashir he would have killed him in cold blood?? while holding a phaser to his own head on the verge of killing himself?#star trek ds9#star trek memes
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I'm normal about this NPC
#Infinity Nikki#Infinity Nikki Spoilers#Nikkiverse#Infinity Nikki Eltinada#Eltinada#Sovereign of Fresh#Starspost#Fandom Starspost#CW Suicide/Self-Harm#He's just a little guy you guys#Eltinada I wuv u so much I will be your fandom if I have to#Memes
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Drive me in your car until the sky gets big..
#lana del rey#coquette#aesthetic#art#cute#poetry#this is what makes us girls#love#lizzy grant#hell is a teenage girl#born to die#ballerina#90s fashion#ballet#black and white#cecilia lisbon#cinammon girl#coquette girl#meme#coquette dollete#virgin mary#the virgin suicides#vintage#lana is our queen#coney island queen#sparkle jump rope queen#elizabeth woolridge grant#elizabeth grant#female experience#vintage americana
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#girlblogging#girlblogger#girly things#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#female hysteria#whisper girl#femcel#girlboss#lana del rey#female manipulator#depressing quotes#feelings#vent blog#vent post#escapism#existentialism#esoteric#relatable#real#relatable memes#born to die#just girly things#the bell jar#the virgin suicides#tw depressive#tw depressing thoughts#tw depressing stuff#mentally unstable#mental illness#actually mentally ill
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"No one defended against Max in Brazil" Oh... I beg you to try and say that (with your full chest) to Charles Leclerc's face -
#f1#formula 1#formula one#max verstappen#charles leclerc#lestappen#you know that meme quote from suicide squad about harley & the joker#she was fearless and crazier than him she was his queen and help anyone who disrespected his queen#<- that's max & charles#they're insane (affectionate) when racing each other and they love it#they push each other to the limit#and in many ways they're still the kids who wrecked each other's races and soaked each other by pushing the other into puddles#no way on gods green earth was Charles going to back out#max has the reputation but charles is right there with him lmao
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