#sugarsugar7

[storyofauke]

So I read one of the reply about Asami openly admitting that Aki was the first person he loved in Finder no Souen. I haven't read it but do u remember how he admit it??

He doesn’t admit it out loud. The end of the novel includes the scene on the boat at the end of volume five, where Asami and Aki are reunited. Asami had a number of thoughts that indicate that he loves Aki and has never had these feelings for anyone else, but he never comes out and says it, certainly not to Aki.

It’s against the group rules to share the translation, so I’ll try to summarize the key points:

* Asami recognizes that he has changed, that he understands that everyone needs someone that they can rely on and that Akihito has become that for him.

* Asami used to think (lie to himself) that he was fulfilling Aki’s desire for him, but now he realizes his own desires for Aki are just as strong.

* Asami thinks that there had been others who supposedly loved him but he had never wanted their love. He wants Aki’s love.

* There were others he had cared about but no one who was irreplaceable, like Aki, never anyone who was this important to him.

* He never thought he’d see the day when he was at the mercy of the emotion of love. 

[storyofauke]

When do you think Asami develop feelings for Akihito? Most people told me it's their first encounter but I don't really see it. What do u think?

Okay, strictly my interpretation, right? So I think those feelings sparked in their first encounter but took time to really catch hold until they burst into full flame. The progression as I see it, with illustrations. 

First spark:

Right there. Aki didn’t respond at all the way Asami expected. Asami is intrigued.

So he figures he’ll have the kid abducted and play around with him a bit. That’ll be fun. Give him something to do for the weekend. But in the midst of this idle diddling, this happens:

Aki’s accusation of cruelty penetrates some layer of Asami’s shell. You can see it in the closeup of his eyes, the discontented expression in the bottom right panel. Asami covers it up bottom left with some light banter and a smile, but I think this is the moment some part of Asami responds to Aki as one human being to another. That humanity is driven home at the end of the first chapter:

Asami is nonplussed by his own reactions to Aki’s naked emotions. These are feelings he shut off long ago. Again, he covers up with banter and tries to move on, but he can’t stay away. In Embrace the Heat of the Night, he makes up the LAMEST OF THE LAME excuses to seek Aki out. (It was raining. At 2:00 in the morning. He’s a freaking billionaire and doesn’t own a damned umbrella?) 

Then there’s the interview sensei conducts with Asami (you can find this at the end of the published volume 3.) The interview takes place in Club Sion during the events of Bodychase, where Aki has sneaked into the club. Asami avoids almost all of sensei’s interview questions and instead muses on Aki. He is DEAD GONE at this point, only he doesn’t know it. 

His own feelings bite him on the ass right here, chapter 9 (the start of volume 3):

Aki has come to him for once! But only for a favor, to save his friends. Not of his own accord, not in accordance with anything Aki might feel for Asami. And Asami is pissed. And that brings us to one of the most quizzical frames in the entire series:

I think this is Asami’s last desperate attempt to convince himself he hasn’t fallen completely for this cheeky kid. It’s cruel (as this one statement has repercussions for Aki all through the next four or five volumes, shaking his confidence and own self-image, leaving a shadow of doubt between them.) But I think it also shines a light on Asami’s need to push away these feelings. What is he afraid of? Weakness? Loss? But he can’t stay in denial for long, not with the drama that surrounds him. He’s pushed to express himself by events:

Again, he’s covering his feelings, but it’s clear. He’s angry–not at Aki’s supposed betrayal but at his own reaction to the possibility of losing Aki, of having left him in danger, of the flood of relief at seeing that he’s okay. This is basically “Thank God you’re all right! I’m never letting you go again!” 

But he does. Or rather, Aki is torn from him, swept away by Fei Long, and that only further draws Asami to openly declare himself. Akihito is his and his alone. He’s in love.

ETA: IMO, Asami falls for Aki way faster than Aki falls for Asami.