#stupid humor for stupid people

[seosamhh]

Men with collars >>>

[mayasaura]

Ianthe is for sure going around picking up gal pals to fill the empty places where she used to have companionship, but you know what? Pretty sure Kiriona is not replacing Harrow in the Coronabeth-shaped hole in her life. Kiriona is the new Babs.

[royalarchivist]

Pac: Oh man, what is this, what is this, what is this man? Where can I buy this? [Slaps his desk] I'll buy two.

Pac: [Laughs] It's very good man, very good. "I love you, Fítche!" [Laughs] You're going to think the worst, this is the worst phrasing you could think of. Like, I mean– a guy might say 'I love being fit, I love go to the gym,' but it was a certain way… I don't know, in English it seems wrong, right? "I love you, Fίtche" I don't know if that makes sense, right? Because it would have to be "I love fitness," right? There should be the 'ness' there at the end, right? Or am I crazy? My understanding of English there should have been an 'ness' at the end, right?

[zoolitsky-fandom]

He’s a filthy little whore of a man

[spikeisawesome456]

While watching the new Sonic movie earlier today, I noticed something and was curious, and figured I would ask Tumblr in a poll.

(Note: the public indecency one is indicating that you sleep in the nude or nearly nude, if anyone is confused. 😉)

I was just curious, since I noticed a bunch of people wearing PJs when I saw Sonic, and I was all… huh. I’d never considered wearing PJ’s to the theater before. But the more I thought about it, the more sense it made, and I was curious if anyone else wears their PJs to the movies, or if I’m just late to party, ha.

[glorbs-dominion]

A very important chart

This is a very important chart. So important, that it made it's way into our "Funny Awards" channel! What do y'all think? Very important?

[coldflash-corner]

"Barry is a total idiot" literature is a classic and a staple in Coldflash culture, and never would I beg the creators who produce it to cease doing so nor would I ever dare say anyone is writing them wrong- just catering to their own preferences

However, my preference is

"Barry acts impulsively, and has to use his big smart brain to think himself out of the situations he put himself in, and is pretty good at the second part when not having a panic attack"

With a helping of

"Sometimes Barry doesn't get certain social cues, but figures everything out pretty quickly one someone tells him the thing he missed"

[burningcheese-merchant]

Ok, I have good news and bad news regarding the BurningCheese time travel AU (that sounds more and more ridiculous every time I say/type it lol)

Good news: Not only have I come up with an official title and written an official plot synopsis, I found someone willing to make cover art for the story!

Bad news: The cover art is going to take several months because the artist is busy with more important things at the moment

It sucks to have to wait that long, but I really adore this artist and their style, so I am ready and willing to do so. I will be using the time in between now and then to iron out the details of the AU. There are a lot of important questions (that other people have actually asked me about/brought to my attention, which I really appreciate!) I need solid answers for for the sake of maintaining functioning logic (the actual time travel especially, time travel is a very tricky concept to work with and I need to make sure it actually makes sense or else the entire narrative is broken)

Gonna go ahead and say this much, since people actually seem interested in the idea:

Will probably be sticking to the Back to the Future approach to time travel rather than the Avengers: Endgame one, it's easier for me to grapple with and I don't like how Endgame handled that shit anyway

Timekeeper will continue to appear even after sending Golden Cheese into the past. She's having too much fun with her new made-up soap opera to stay away like she probably should lol

The other Beasts (or Heralds, in this time) will appear, but I will not explain when, how or why

Slow burn romance. Just because Burning Spice is a hero in this time doesn't mean Golden Cheese automatically gets over her fear and hatred of him. The only BS she's ever known up until this point is the Beast of Destruction; the mass-murdering, obsessed lunatic that was actively trying to hurt her before Timekeeper intervenes. She will warm up to Herald Spice eventually, but it will take time and effort on both of their parts

There is an ending. I've already come up with an ending to the story. It came to me while I was out running errands and I simply cannot get over it. It's bittersweet, but I think it fits. Now I need to write everything else around it because I refuse to let it go lol. (You're really not supposed to do this in writing, but I'm forging ahead with the risk this time. I love the ending too much to throw it away)

You're all more than welcome to reach out and ask stuff about the story, even as it's still a WIP; it's been really nice to see people actually express interest in this concept (and as I'm sure you've noticed, I Like To Ramble lol). I just can't reveal the more important parts, so I encourage you to stick to more basic/general comments, questions and/or concerns.

Thank you all for your enthusiasm and your patience! I'm cooking something really special for you all, I promise!

[mvmnbnv]

Jinx would look at vi crying and have no idea what to say or do and just go "well at least ur a pretty crier"

And vis just like: *sniffs* 🤨🤨🤨!?!?!?!?

(Taken straight from an irl experience I had lmao)

[shutinthenutouse]

[srslylini]

I need to buy a gun

[a-meh]

[shannonsketches]

He said "Fuck this shit, I'm out" I'm crying. Toriyama's Vegeta was so top shelf 🤌

(From Neko Majin Z Chapter 5!)

[thebaffledcaptain]

Walking back to the barracks and I hear a voice behind me go “make way for the King’s donuts!” and I turn around and see this:

Folks, this is why I love reenactment

[coquelicoq]

There are 60 million people in Britain. There are 200 million in America. (Can that be right?) How many millions of English-speakers other nations might add to the total I cannot even guess. I would be willing to bet, though, that in all those hundreds of millions not more than 50, at the outside, have read A. Roemer, Aristarchs Athetesen in der Homerkritik (Leipzig, 1912), a work untranslated from its native German and destined to remain so till the end of time. I joined the tiny band in 1985. I was 23. The first sentence of this little-known work runs as follows: Es ist wirklich Brach- und Neufeld, welches der Verfasser mit der Bearbeitung dieses Themas betreten und durchpflügt hat, so sonderbar auch diese Behauptung im ersten Augenblick klingen mag. I had taught myself German out of Teach Yourself German, and I recognised several words in this sentence at once: It is truly something and something which the something with the something of this something has something and something, so something also this something might something at first something. I deciphered the rest of the sentence by looking up the words Brachfeld, Neufeld, Verfasser, Bearbeitung, Themas, betreten, durchpflügt, sonderbar, Behauptung, Augenblick, and klingen in Langenscheidt's German-English dictionary.

The Last Samurai by Helen DeWitt, i, 1, p 17

[maxgrade]

If you're so smart, why aren't you rich? Turns out you're fucking stupid.