#stop being emo and fooling yourself into thinking that doesnt exist!!! idiot!!!!!!!

[thegreatyin]

Thought I'd weigh in on the Caeru ending debate. It's not my place to say whether or not he should turn back, but the thing with Caeru is, I have never gotten the impression at any point thus far that he's lost enough of himself that he can't turn back. He contains wants other than HATE/GRIEVE/SEEK - he's still capable of love. He has not yet totally subsumed himself into the demands of the Name. There is enough of him left that if he turns back, whilst he will not escape the experience unscathed, there is a foundation to rebuild from.

This is in contrast to my own Seeking alt, the Shadow (not Yiniverse Shadow, a different Shadow). By the time they reach the point that Caeru has, there will be nothing left of them. In-universe, this is because they've lived their entire Neathy life with absolutely no support structure which they didn't subsequently kick out from under themselves, they have no close relationships to ground them, they've developed an underage drinking problem, and they will have seen firsthand exactly what Veils is - out of universe, this is because their narrative purpose is fundamentally very different to Caeru's.

Caeru is a hero from a romantic tragedy - a byronic character, dark and brooding, pushing away their loved ones and committing acts of blasphemous magic and science for the sake of saving someone they cared for. Depending on the author, he could find salvation, or he could fail to do so. The Shadow is a villain from one of those same stories. They're a Heathcliff, a Havisham, a character who has been and is still undeniably miserable, but who allows themselves to be consumed by it until there's nothing left but bitterness and rage. The end, when it comes, will almost be a mercy - but there is no question that it will, one day, arrive.

fascinating character analysis in my inbox, thank you!

you do have a good point in regards to caeru not being "too far gone" by... pretty much any stretch of the imagination, honestly. seeking for most is all-consuming and all-annihilating. seeking for caeru is mostly just an act of self-implosion. the shrapnel may hit those around him, but the main target will always be himself.

i am leaning towards sparing him more than i'd like to admit. though he definitely isn't turning back without getting the knock first (i've spent far, far, far too long stuck at winking isle to not commit to that)

.............this isn't to say he 100% won't knock, of course.

he is Doomed for a reason.