#still trying to process yday

[amorettopedri]

already missing him ❤️

[nohkalikai]

one day i'll cover something properly instead of just fucking around and having fun but yesterday was not that day

[bemsss]

God speaks. even when i am too weary to speak to Him. i truly do not deserve Him and yet He gives more grace.

this was another trying week. i found myself spent at the end of each day. my mind defaulted to wandering and wasting; the line between my productivity and my idle time completely blurred. i was very depressed 2-3 weeks ago but found myself in a similar space yet again. and though i knew i wasn't hopeless, i began to feel that way. i eased into the murkiness of sullenness. i fell into quicksand disguised as a comfort zone. so easily. yet again.

but God. i can't say everything is better because it isn't. but let me tell you about the mercy of God. gratitude has been the resounding theme of this week. i didn't realize it would be my actual saving grace. it has allowed me to see what is. sadness is so pretentious. hyperfocusing on problems can make you feel like such a know-it-all, but it's just a mirage. it's not real life, but it convinces you that it's all there is to life. the pride in self-obsession is also eerily isolating, as if its other side effects weren't bad enough.

God has made a major change in my life recently. i am still adjusting to it and processing it daily. it's for me, and it's one change that changes everything. however, i somehow still found a way to my trusted, old default, the one that never leaves me satisfied or grateful for my life, no matter the moment i find myself in. my mind had no space to consider joy, no reserves to remember my need of it.

but God. He remembered me. through two serendipitous conversations: one with a patient at my job and the other with the receptionist at my dentist's office. through the Scriptures He led me to this week. through prayer. through conversations with my loved ones in Christ. through His very word on my mind and in my heart. and just in His kindness, through my coworkers honoring me yesterday 🥺 (related to the change i mentioned earlier). being seen by God was on my mind yday morning but it took the day to unfold and for the week to conclude for the mosaic to make sense to me. <3

life may not be what it was

and it certainly will not always be what it is

but time is passing

and emotions are terribly fleeting

according to the Lord

who loves me more than i could ever dare to love myself

i deserve to love the life i have

and truly live it

thank you 💚

[taegularities]

Hello lovely Rid 💕💕

I'm so so so unbelievably excited for cmi11!!! I can't wait to see simp Jungkook and all the fluff that comes with it (and the little bit of angst perhaps still?) I don't know when I'll be able to start it though, since it's shaping up to be a busy weekend for me, but I definitely will devour it at my earliest convince.

I really hope you're feeling better health wise, Rid!! I got sick last Sunday and am still trying to battle it all, haven't been to class all week 😭😭😭 I'm hosting something at mine on Sunday night though (at which my crush will be present 😔) so I have to get better until then!! Please wish me luck lmao I might need it.

Sending you all of my love and energy for finishing up the editing process, Rid!! You've got this and I'm completely sure that this chapter will be amazing 💞💞💞

ivi, my sweetheart, the way it broke my heart to read that you've been sick :') i guess it's that time rn, bc so many i know aren't feeling well :(( i hope you've been resting and hydrating and eating well and taking your meds!! you better not overwork yourself or do anything taxing during that time!! and gosh, i get being sad about not attending classes bc work piles up and the feeling of unproductivity is eh :') health has priority tho, so take care >:O sending you so much energy to get better by sunday, like.. our ivi needs to get that man 💅🏽 i'm feeling better, love, thank you. still coughing a bit and been having bad headaches since yday, but it's gotten a lot better!!

and don't worry 🥺 whenever you do read it, i'll be here, waiting to get cosy to read your review. there is so much to cry about, so i'm extremely curious — i feel like you'd like this one hehe but do take your time 🥺🤍 all my love and hugs for you 🫂

[odiwtbl]

Not My Pool | Eddie Munson

Eddie Munson x Reader

Warnings: None really. Slight swearing? Trespassing?

Author's note: trying to make up for the lil sad Eddie piece from yday :) Also I’m still not used to writing for Eddie so idk if it’s any good. Also also, not beta’d

Wc: 2215

---

“Eddie are you sure this is a good idea?” You hissed as you snuck closer to the treeline.

It was the first week of summer and Eddie, your best friend, had somehow convinced you to literally trespass and sneak into Steve Harrington’s pool. The woods you were both running through were dark, everything was quiet except the low hum of the nighttime bugs, adrenaline softly running through you gradually getting more intense the closer you got to the other boy's house.

The soft lights from the pool shone through the gaps in the trees before you, blacking out Eddie’s silhouette. “Stop being such a pussy, come on” The metalhead urged. He turned and reached out behind him, grabbing your upper arm and pulling you forward so you were next to him. His hand moved down your arm to your hand, intertwining his fingers with your own.

“What if his parents catch us? What if they call the police?” You rambled, butterflies making a home in your stomach.

Eddie just turned to face you, half of his face lit up in the soft blue light. He grinned at you, eyebrows raised, eyes shining. “Then we run.”

The small town of Hawkins had been suspended in a thick heat for the past month now. The kind of heat that constantly lingers no matter what you do to try and alleviate it, which is the only reason you had agreed to Eddie’s stupid plan, but that was thirty minutes ago, and this is now, and only now are you realising how dumb this is.

Eddie had been getting you into trouble for the past year since you joined Hellfire, and since you had become good friends. It was known that if Eddie was somewhere, you were close by, ‘like an Ettin’ Dustin and Mike would always say. The boy had brought you so far out of your comfort zone. You weren’t super shy, to begin with, but compared to Eddie Munson you may as well have been a dormouse. An unexpected friendship bloomed between the two of you, no one in Hellfire truly expected it, and neither did you or Eddie; but opposites do attract, apparently.

Stumbling your way through the last bit of overgrowth, the two of you reached the soft grass of Steve’s garden, the pool only a few metres away. The lights weren’t on in the house, 3 am wasn’t the typical time the Harrington family were up and about. Eddie dropped your hand, instead reaching for the hem of his Guns N Roses tee, pulling it over his head and fluffing up his hair in the process. You giggled as he shook his head back and forth, trying to lay his curly hair back into place. “How do I look, M’lady?” His eyes gleamed at you, a soft smirk appearing on his lips.

You huffed out a laugh, “Like a dumbass.” You jabbed, playfully shoving his shoulder. Eddie feigned hurt, holding his hand over his chest. He took a step toward you. Then another. And another, and before you could react he had scooped you up and walked you over to the edge of the pool. “Eddie, don’t you dare!” You looped your arms around his neck as a safety measure, but pulled back to look at his face.

“Tell me I look handsome.” Eddie flashed you a mischievous grin.

“Nuh uh. No way,” You shook your head, “Bribery isn’t the way to go Munson.”

He held your body out over the pool. “Just tell me what I wanna hear and nobody has to get wet.”

“Eddie I am not playing. I don’t wanna get my jeans wet!”

“Then say the words, princess.” He fake dropped you by an inch, laughing at your squealing.

“Fine! Fine! You look handsome, Eddie Munson.” You deadpanned.

“Oh come on, you can do better than that.” You glared at him while he only smiled back at you with all his teeth on show.

“…You are the most handsomest, most beautiful, most amazing person in this stupid town,” You raised your eyebrows at him, “Better?”

“Much”. Eddie spun around and placed you down on the ground, turning back to the pool to step out of his own jeans. An idea presented itself to you, one that would have been criminal if missed. You reached out and tapped Eddie’s shoulder, making him look at you, and as he did so you pushed his shoulder once more, harder this time, till he tipped back and fell in the pool.

He resurfaced, hair stuck to him, a look of shock on his face. “You little minx.” You just shrugged over him, returning the playful grin he had given you earlier.

“Game’s a game, Munson.” You pulled your own clothes off, top first, and then shimmied out of your jeans, leaving you in your underwear, his gaze on you the entire time. “You can stop staring though.”

Eddie chuckled, pushing himself softly to the edge of the pool. “Game’s a game.”

You sat down, your legs next to him in the water, Eddie leant on his arm looking up at you. “Are you coming in or what?” You looked up at the stars, a content sigh left your lips. This is where you want to be. Now and forever. “What’s got you looking like that?” Eddie poked your thigh causing goosebumps to rise at his touch.

You slid yourself over the edge and into the pool, with a little less than a splash, treading the water and turning yourself so you were face to face with the boy.

“I’m just… really happy right now.” You looked at the boy opposite you. Like, really looked at him. The bottom parts of his hair were floating in the water, the rest of it damp and strung around his face. The lights in the pool lit up his flyaways, creating a blue halo around Eddie. Drops of water clung to his skin, on his face and down onto his collarbones. His freckles were more prominent now from the days spent out in the sun together. You could see his eyes tracing over your face, the hint of a smile lingering on his lips.

“Are you looking at my lips, y/l/n?” You watched as his smile grew.

“Why did you have to ruin the moment, Eddie? It was about to get deep, I could feel it.” You laughed.

“Yeah well, I’ll ruin any moment if it means I get to see you laugh.”

“You’re a dork.”

“Jerk.”

“Idiot.”

“You love me.”

“Do I, Eddie?”

“Yes.”

“And you’d know that how?”

“Because I see the way you look at me.”

It felt like the air had been sucked out of your body. Like you were choking on the pool water without even being submerged. “I-I don’t- I, uh-” You stammered.

“Am I wrong?” Eddie just looked at you, plain and simple. Normally you could read every emotion that crossed his mind, but as of right now there was nothing to go off of. You couldn’t even hazard a guess.

“O-of course, I love you, Eddie. You’re like, my best friend?” You laughed it off, even though you could feel your cheeks heating up.

Eddie tilted his head, one eyebrow raised, staring down into your eyes. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.” He waited a few seconds, each one that passed felt like an hour to you. He moved his hand to your chin, lifting your face to look at him. Your heart hammered in your chest, soft waves of adrenaline passed through you. “If I’m wrong I’ll drop it. Just, tell me I’m wrong.” He spoke softly.

You looked at the man in front of you. The man you had been looking at for past year. The man that had helped you learn D&D, the man that had brought you out of your comfort zone more than anyone had, the man that had taught you how to really have fun. The memories of you both laughing together flashed through your minds eye, you could see the time you had watched Nightmare on Elm Street and it ended up in you throwing popcorn at each other in his trailer. Or the time you had gone to Starcourt and Eddie stole some twizzlers for you. Or the first time you stayed back and helped him pack up after a long D&D session and he drove you home, leaving you with an Iron Maiden cassette to listen to.

“Eddie.. I- I don’t know what to say.” You frowned lightly.

“Nah it’s cool, my bad.” Eddie dropped his hand from your face, and pushed himself off the wall of the pool, and away from you. “I shouldn’t have assumed!” He called out from the opposite side.

Your shoulders dropped, a soft sigh escaping your body. “Eddie, can you come back here.” He looked at you for a beat, before dipping under the water. What a child, you thought to yourself.

You pushed yourself off from the wall also, following suit, and diving under the water towards him. Eddie was sat cross legged at the bottom of the pool, cheeks puffed out filled with air. His hair was drifting up around him, making you giggle slightly. You swam forward, kicking your legs to reach him faster.

You sat opposite him underwater, just looking at each other. Everything around you was blue, Eddie’s entire warm colour palette taken over by the colour. You reached out and pushed his cheeks together, the air he held in them rushing out in bubbles to the surface, but he stayed at the bottom staring at you. Using your whole body, you mimed a huff, emphasising the action so he could understand your annoyance.

Reaching out and grabbing both of his hands, you kicked up and pulled the both of you to the surface. The two of you gasped for air as you broke from the water. “Can you just- listen to me.” You panted.

Eddie nodded, but looked everywhere but your face. This time you reached forward and grabbed his chin, pulling his face to look at you. “That’s better.” You flashed him a sarcastic smile. “Eddie, I don’t know what to say, because I’m not- I- I don’t. This kind of stuff doesn’t happen to me.” Eddie’s expression grew quizzical, but he didn’t speak, allowing you to continue talking. “I’m just… me. And I’ve never had anyone like me. Not even in that way! I didn’t have friends before Hellfire, I didn’t have a best friend before you, I didn’t know what it was like to have people just, like me. And I think you’re amazing, and so funny, and really cool but-”

“-But I’m Eddie Munson.” He cut you off.

“-But you’re the Eddie Munson. And I think I do like you in that way, but I’m scared that I’m not enough for you.” You finished, still holding onto his face, but now you were looking down.

A small silence fell over the both of you, the night air filling the space. The sound of the water filter running in the back the only prominent noise that could be heard. Your heart rate was picking up again, that adrenaline filling your veins once more. You shivered as the night air cooled off some of the water on your skin. The time passing was unbearable but you were too scared to move, to say anything more. You didn’t want to ruin anything. But before you could think of anything else Eddie began to speak. “I’m Eddie the Freak,” You looked up at him, it looked like he could start crying at any moment, “and you’re- you’re you.” It was your turn to look at him in confusion now, “You’re this pure creature that fell into my path, and don’t get me wrong I’m so happy you’re not, but I thought you’d be long gone by now. I didn’t want to, corrupt you, ruin you. I just wanted you to be happy. And then you stuck around, and I got to know you and-” He cut himself off.

A few hot tears had fallen over your cheeks. You didn’t know why you were crying, but something in you just felt so loved.

“Can I kiss you?” Eddie pulled himself closer to you, until your bodies were against each other under the water.

You didn’t reply, instead just closing the gap between you, your lips centimetres apart. You could feel Eddie’s breath fanning across you face, and you were fairly certain you could hear his heart pounding. Or maybe it was yours, you were too spaced out to care.

Eddie moved the rest of the way, placing his lips over yours. It was soft and sweet, and you could feel everything that he wanted to say, that he didn’t have to now. You smiled against him, moving your arms to rest on the sides of his neck. He pulled back and leant his forehead against yours, looking into your eyes, that mischievous look back where it belongs.

Eddie opened his mouth to speak, but just as he started all of the back porch lights flicked on.

“HEY! GET OUT OF MY POOL BEFORE I CALL THE COPS!”

“We should run.”

---

[destroyedwoman]

cw disordered eating + fatphobia vent

fatphobia is literally one of the most evil forces on the planet I used 2 be chubby right like last year. I hit a depression in the summer that messed w/ my eating patterns. The September immediately following that my best friend took his life. I stopped eating not as protest but I think it was grief + grief’s influence on my sensory processes who knows anyway I went through months of horrible starvation and deprivation tht I am still trying to work thru every day... and the most insidious thing is I have felt the worst I have ever been in my life, the most unhealthy physically and mentally, and while a few people have expressed mild concerns about how quickly the weight drops it’s always immediately followed by a compliment. And it’s such a horrible experience because when I DID put on weight prior, when I went from being a skinny teen to a chubby adult (I say chubby to be as honest as possible bc there are fatter people who go thru much worse) I got immediately put down. Even tho when I put the weight on I was happy. 

Bc I was eating way more balanced meals. I was enjoying myself more. I was eating in public I was cooking I was just in general in a happier state of mind and body. But I was punished for it , not physically but socially and mentally. And to go from that to this , to feeling like I’m decaying in my body, my hair is brittle and falling out, my stomach hurts all of the time, I wake up in pain with nausea, I feel weak and shaky most of time - yday I got my period & I got a painkiller & I struggled to pop it from its foil - and that’s what gets me compliments. That’s what gets people who love me to tell me I look good. It’s just so fucked. Fatphobia doesn’t care about health. It cares about restriction, limitation, humiliation until you get back into line. It’s militant. I have nothing but the most searing of contempt and disgust for fatphobia in people and in culture, in diet fads and skinny teas and all the dead-eyed celebrities who parrot it and all of the doctors who refuse to save your life unless you’re skinny enough to have earned it. 

[writtenwhalien]

Hey, loveee 🥰

Well I'm stupid for saying this, but I want to apologize if sometimes there are any errors or mistakes in my responses (I woke up today, got onto tumblr and I was faced with my last night's mess. Jeez! 😅🤦‍♀️) I swear, autocorrect won't stop messing up with me while texting. Plus, that thing where you try to edit replies to a reblog, but somehow they remain unfixed down in the comment box is so annoying. And even though I want to be as fluent as possible in English, I'll never be good enough because it's not my native language. I know that's not a big deal as the main goal is to deliver messages and have an easy communication, but still. I'm a perfectionist... 🥺

In a more positive light, my brain's still processing all the shocking information from last night's reading. What a wild night!?🔥 Hope you have a lovely day in whatever you do and if you feel like talking about anything I'm always here to listen. Love you! ❤❤

Happy April fools' day, btw! God, I hate lies sm and I hate this day as well! (funny how it's right after by b-day 😭)

looooool, no it’s okay, sometimes my typing messes up real bad too and auto-correct makes it worse. it usually happens when i’m really tired. and i find that so annoying too, esp after someone else has reblogged it but your original mistake remains! your english is perfect, i always understand everything you’re saying clearly, not to worry at all! ☺️

aw, i’m happy you thought it was a wild night loooool, alr is definitely going to have a lot more moments like that ;) thank you, anna, i appreciate that very much 🥺❤️ today i’m mostly studying so i’m trying to enjoy it lol. i hope you have a wonderful day too!! 🥰💗💘

and about April Fools, i also hate the day looool, but i’m hoping that hobi wasn’t messing with us on weverse yday, i want his hair to be red again!

[charlie-minion]

charlie-minion(.)tumblr(.)com/post/635987979304943616/could-the-same-spn-finale-make-a-little-more-sense Hey Love! Thanks for such an amazing post! It was still hard for me personally to deal with it for many reasons, but when you mentioned "yeah well we gotta work around Dean dying so let’s work around Dean dying then, stay with me" i understood why u went where u went with it. I just wanted to ask your opinion/suggest/question few things if u don't mind. 1) I can see Dean's speech (1/9)

“If we don’t keep living, then all that sacrifice is gonna be for nothing” make sense, except in psychlogy grieving and remembering people who died is not the same as not letting go. I feel this point could be GREATLY improved if we saw some memorabilia in bunker around Cas (without Dean paying much attention to them or being sad about them (2/9)

[?Miracle running to him for cuddles with mixtape in mouth and Dean freaking out about how it’s the best dog ever cuz he loves Led Zeppelin or sth, idk I’m making it up as I go with examples, dont mind me?]) and would either see that Dean is still grieving while working on letting go (not bc he can’t let go, but because grieving is a process and IT IS HEALTHY to grieve. Too many ppl are shamed for needing time to heal(!!) while it’s actually personal and normal and we know Dean doesn’t (3/9)

just insta forget (from experience), and grieving has more to do with emotionality and less with not being able to let go). OR we could be shown in some way that more time passed and he did already get to heal from grief. That would save Dean from seeming suddenly uncaring and emotionless (especially while knowing Cas is in super hell for eternity, not just ‘dead whatever it means’, and considering Dean WAS in hell and knows it’s not ‘fun and games’) towards anyone who isn’t his brother. (4/9)

I realize episode is Sam centered, but this picks huge focus on Dean by omission. 2) I feel it doesn’t matter so much whether Sam picked phone to call as that he easily decided to give up on calling while he could still stay with Dean, listen to him and continue to make the call. That death took like 7-8 minutes of the episode. The phone should be left in the car for example, it being crushed during fight is lame and cheap, but any excuse would be better than (5/9)

“Ok I guess I’ll stop calling and let u die, don’t tell me I didn’t try”. 3) That whole “I love you so much” really hit me hard when I was watching, while I fully agree with the point you made, I feel like adding “so much” was just too passionate. As you said, he needs to say it to Sam before anyone else. "I love you, my baby brother” – second part already makes it valuable and emotional. It does no business being passionate. He is dying (for a while now) adding words that don’t (6/9)

need to be there makes viewer question “Is he rly going to die? He seems to have no problem flowering his words” and to me at least felt like going from 0 (unability to say ILY) to million which just took me from the situation totally as I was questioning if I’m watching the right show/character. It’s like if Dean went to Sam in episode 1 about finding his dad, we would be informed just how relations between Dean and John looks like, and next episode they would go for burgers (7/9)

and Dean would be like “Yeah I got bored of looking for him” and show would end… 4) Also MoTW not being from journal would make world of difference. That’s a callback that rly puts the story back to years before and Dean dying finishing his father’s job seems like a joke in rly bad taste. That’s all that crossed my mind I think. What do you think about those? Sorry for a long msg. I can try to send it via phone in one piece if you would rather. I’m really interested in your opinion on it. (8/9)

I know you were trying to fix stuff with as small changes as possible in your post, but I felt those also were just small things that would mean world to fans and story. Thank you so much for giving yself to the fandom, you’re my all time favourite writer since I remember <3 (9/9)

Hey! Sorry again, I'm the anon from yday with that long question. I just felt it was worth adding: "“Dean is focusing on the task at hand. His attitude, as Ackles puts it, is, “I’m not going to think about what I’ve lost. In turn, I’m just going to focus on what I can fix.” That leads Dean down what Ackles calls a “hopeless road.”" (it’s interview about s13). Just to point out hopelessness in stopping yself from thinking of who u lost to forcefully direct yself to the future. :D 

Hello, Nonnie! Sorry it took me so long to answer. The post you are referring to is this one: Could the same SPN finale make a little more sense with some additions/changes?

I didn’t write that as the kind of finale I would want. I did it to prove the finale could have been the same: pandering to general audience, w*ncest and destiel shippers alike, while still keeping some sort of logic regarding the build up of the story. It didn’t have to be so bad, but it was, and it looks intentionally bad, if I’m being honest. Maybe it was better that way, because it made it easier for us to simply ignore the existence of it. 

Regarding all the points you sent in your messages to me, I’m just gonna post them all together because they seem interesting, but I don’t really want to spend more time thinking about a finale that already hurt me enough. The only two posts I’ve written about the finale were for me to cope, to kinda heal and let it go. Now I just pretend it never happened. I’m glad you had some space to vent and I’m posting your messages so others can read the whole thing and maybe let comments if they want to agree or disagree, but that’s all I can do. 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and the fandom as well. Everything that helps us heal is valid. *hugs*

[tenglows]

Could I request # 8 and enemies to lovers with fluff with Ten from the prompts? Thank you💛 Tried to send one yday, but i think it got cut after hi hi 😅

[ 8: kiss me again and you’ll see ] i loved this so much i got a little bit carried away and made it kind of long. i'm sorry jsjd

the prompts

you were one of the best bakers in town. one of them, not the actual best. although you believed you deserved to be the only one with that title.

you had never considered yourself a competitive person until you met ten. the town’ sweetheart who for your misfortune, owned the other most claimed bakery.

for a while, you did take the cake for making the best pastries and desserts. you had always loved cooking, and having your store filled with your satisfied neighbors every day was all you could ever ask for. you lived in a small town too, so acclamation flew fast and soon there was not a single villager that wasn’t obsessed with your patisserie.

that lasted until there was a new baker in town. it was never a drastic popularity loss that caused your shop being completely empty and your sales crashing down, but you were totally sharing the praise that was previously merely yours with ten’ stupid sweet eyes.

therefore, it was an understanding that you hadn’t stepped out of your kitchen ever since the town mayor announced the yearly municipal contest. it consisted on the food professionals exhibiting their specialities, people trying everything so at the end of the day, they could vote who was their favorite.

every year in a row you had been given the medal of the bakery position, but for the first time in your life you now had your doubts. could you really win against ten?

hibernating in your kitchen resulted in you going over your recipes, modifying everything a hundred times until you found the perfect design. your friends and family adored you, but you were honestly driving them a little nuts, filling their mouths with cakes every second and asking which they liked better. only for you to not listen to their thoughts and start another recipe from scratch.

it was almost midnight when you were convinced you had finally figured the exact and right amount of ingredients you needed to make the winning cake. you wrote it down so you wouldn’t forget, on the roughed notebook that had the instructions of all the supposedly winning cakes.

after frantically opening the fridge, you almost broke down to tears when you couldn’t find anymore eggs. how could you have ran out of eggs???

you glanced at the clock before storming out of your house, running to the small market down the street. everything was closed now, but you knew old patty kept her store open until midnight.

“hi patty” you sighed and sprant inside, heading to the egg’s shelf.

there was no one in sight until, of course, in front of you, there was ten. holding the last egg carton.

you looked daggers at him. trying to step back so you wouldn’t end up physically harming him.

“ten” you spoke slowly, containing yourself from exploding. “i really need those eggs”

“i need them too, y/n. this is simply a matter of who got here first”

he smiled at you, almost looking nice, and left you there.

when you got back to your place you were a mess. you pulled your hair while you screamed all the words you would like to say to ten. his comment had annoyed you more than you could explain. if it truly was a matter of who got there first, this had always been your town. he was the intruder, the one who got here last. hence, he should have given you the eggs.

you were doodling on your journal when there was a knock on the door. you furrowed your eyebrows, wondering who of the people you knew would show up at one in the morning.

seeing ten with a basket full of eggs was an image you couldn’t wrap your mind around when you opened the door.

“these are better than the ones at the market”

“where are they from?”

“from my chickens. i raise and take care of them myself, i assure you won’t find better eggs than these ones”

you looked at him distrustfully, still not taking the box from his hands.

“why are you being nice to me?”

ten ignored your question and looked around your house, solely what he could observe from your doorstep, since it didn’t seem you would let him in.

he beamed sincerely at you when he noticed all the various cakes spreaded around your furniture.

“don’t be too hard on yourself, y/n” you didn’t know what to say, specially because those were the words you needed to hear at this time of pure self-criticism.

“hey, the cake of yours that is white chocolate mousse with lemon cream inside is mind blowing. totally contest worthy. i think it was called blanc?”

that comment took you aback.

“when on earth have you bought one of my cakes?” you didn’t recall the boy ever coming to your shop, you would probably have kicked him out if he had.

“my mom got it for her birthday” he shrugged and put the basket on your door mat. “goodnight, y/n”

ten walked away after that, and now you were staring at the eggs in your kitchen counter. you had never seen ones so fresh since forever, they were in impeccable condition.

you shook your head and stored them in the fridge. you couldn’t accept help from the competition, that was just plain weak.

you got ready for bed and reminded yourself to get eggs at patty’s first thing in the morning. you also crossed out “blanc!!!! winning cake!!!!! (for real this time)” from the notebook.

it was finally the day from the contest, the town had been beautifully adorned, garlands hanging from the food stands.

you were currently at your stall, serving people the cake with a big smile even though you were a nervous wreck. you had barely left your spot to try the other delicious stuff that was going around.

“i see you settled on that one. it must be delicious. can i try?”

ten spoke softly with a smile on his lips. like he always had.

“just so you know, i had already made up my mind before you came by” you cut a piece and passed it to him.

of course you didn’t trust ten’s recommendation to go for that exact cake. what if he was planning to do the same and then accuse you of plagiarism? you never knew. but after asking around and confirming that he had prepared a chocolate cake, you were safe.

“mm, this is great. seriously. really tasty and the right amount of sweet”

“thank you”

ten arched his eyebrows at that.

“what did you say?”

“thank you” you repeated a little louder, still mumbling, not wanting him to actually hear you.

“wow, the y/n thanking me?? her archenemy???? must be my lucky day”

you couldn't help but giggle. the truth was that ten wasn't a bad person or anything for that matter. he was actually really nice and sweet, maybe that was made you hate him even more.

“did you use my eggs?”

“not really”

“what, why?”

“i wasn't sure if you had poisoned them”

you spoke in such serious and confident tone now it was his turn to burst into laughter.

“you really think i would modify my chickens just so i could give you poisoned eggs”

“better safe than sorry”

“you are something else” you wondered how he never appeared without a smile. it was like his signature. but you kinda didn't mind it today.

“do you want to try mine?”

you nodded and he guided you towards his stand. the cake was delightful, and you became aware that you had never actually tried ten's cooking before.

suddenly, you heard the mayor's voice through a megaphone saying they would announce the winner soon. ten and you went together to the town square, before parting ways to your respective friends. he didn't leave without wishing you luck first.

your mom wrapped her arms around you as the winning names were told. the bakery category was left for last, and your nails were suffering the effect of your nerves.

“and the winner for this years best baker goes to...”

you shut your eyes.

“y/n!!!!”

your family and friends cheered noisier than everyone else, but your eyes glowed when seeing the entire reunited town applauding and complimenting you. all that energy and hard work had reaped its fruits and it made you more than happy. you only wished you could have enjoyed the process a bit more, after all, you loved baking and you loved this town. you shouldn't need much more.

you were thanking someone when you saw ten making his way towards you. he waited aside for you to finish, a radiant smile on his face.

“congrats”

“thanks a lot, ten. your cake was great as well”

the boy moved closer and fixed his eyes on yours. your arms shivered. you had never let him be this close to you, and you could sense he was testing the waters by the way he hesitated sluggishly.

honestly, you weren't even conscious of your surroundings when ten kissed you. this was a scenario you had never given thought to before, but it didn't bother you, not one bit. you liked it, his lips on top of yours. his mouth was so warm from all the smiles he gifted.

he pulled away and looked at you once again. he had expected you to run away, scream at him, hell, maybe even punch him, but you didn't. you just stayed there, beautiful as ever. and he thanked all the gods above for that.

“here, i made you a congratulations cupcake. i always knew you would win” you hadn't noted he had an arm behind his back, which was now handing you a cupcake with flawless buttercream icing.

“how can i know this is not poisoned?”

ten eyed you before taking a bite out the pastry, watching you as he did, humming in satisfaction.

“there's only one way to find out. kiss me again and you’ll see”.

[merluca-ga]

After yday’s ep and next week’s promo, I need some positive Merluca info. Anything that can help?

I know how you feel, anon! It wasn’t easy to watch those moments. But I’ll try and spread some positivity where I can. Here’s what I’ve got so far.

1) We were warned this was going to happen. Krista Vernoff did explain that things will happen that will “test a new relationship”. I think this is what she was referring to.

2) I highly doubt that the show would have spent a whole season building up the relationship to throw it aside now. And after all, what is going on with Meredith is a serious situation. I think, in the Grey’s universe, it would be hard to find a couple who could get through this sort of drama without any road bumps at all. It’s clear Andrew wants to protect Meredith, while at the same time support her, and I think it’s fair to say that while Meredith’s intentions are good, she is being somewhat reckless with her career and future.

I’ve put the other points under a cut, as they involve speculation and spoilers for upcoming episodes.

3) We know that there is a Halloween episode coming up (16x06), and Aniela Gumbs (who plays Zola) was hinting on instagram (I believe) there will possibly be more scenes with her and Giacomo. And given the episode description involves Meredith not being sure whether she’ll be able to make it in time to take her kids trick or treating, it might be a perfect time for Andrew to step up and show her he isn’t just “sexy” and “fun”. But this is all guesswork (and hope) on my part, of course. 

4) From the scenes that were filmed in Seattle recently, both Ellen and Giacomo were spotted filming an outdoor scene where they were in quite formal - one might say, court or hearing appropriate - clothes. It seems that in future episodes, Andrew is still going to be supporting Meredith throughout this process. Hopefully still as her boyfriend! I’d like to think that means good news, although with Grey’s, you never can tell.

These are just my thoughts, of course. But I’d love to hear what you guys think.

[julla]

listen.. before i go to sleep i wanted to say some things i want to get off my chest. like ive said a few times already, i still have hope. its so so hard to explain what my mind is going through when even i myself dont fully understand my emotions and thoughts and feelings. of course we are all angry, disappointed, sad. but lets not be hateful towards seungri, or each other, yet. until everything is absolutely confirmed and official, there’s still this little possibility that maybe we shouldn’t abandon him in a second. i know ive talked to u guys the whole day and i’ve said maybe mean things. i’ve certainly thought them. but at the end of the day, we know nothing what seungri is going through right now. 1) the chats arent confirmed to be 100% valid evidence. 2) police hasn’t said anything official about seungri. 3) a chat circulated in the beginning of this case where someone said sth along the lines of “lets ruin burning sun with seungri’s name” or sth. we dont know anything! we cant be sure! (i’m /not/ saying seungri is innocent. he’s obviously involved in this mess and w these people. his association already ended everything) just.. jjy was found guilty in just days. other celebs are coming forward and resigning from the industry and confessing. why isnt seungri? something is different w his case. im not saying he wasnt in the groupchats just... aarrrghh. let’s just... wait. i get fired up too! answering asks i get really emotional and say things on a whim. im trying tho. and im glad my dash is acting reasonable - thank u for that! - there are people who have dropped him already and rooting for ot4, and there are people who still have faith in him. im seriously the mix of both, and i understand each side. im confused and sad and its really hard to form a rational opinion if ure not thinking straight plus constantly get new information which u have to process. what i wanted to say is.. both of the sides get hate. from other fandoms but also other vips, which imo is even worse. give people time. its a stressful time for all of us. lets not fight and make our lives even harder. i’m sorry again if im being unclear w my views in my posts and answers. like i said, it’s a lot to process. maybe i should shut up like i tried yday. but i also want to comfort and support other vips. we are all heartbroken! thank u and im sorry. and please, have some sympathy and empathy. give it time.

[actuallyschizoid]

Yeah I think that's how most covert schizoids get by tbh. In most people such patterns of behavior or facial expressions would trigger an emotion, which is why people usually smile back when you smile at them for example. In schizoid people these things rather trigger the thought process of why the person is behaving a certain way or what is the cause of their expression. We have to consciously go through this process to conclude the underlying emotion because it is not mirrored automatically.

Same link which I’m still not sure about.

Yeah, that used to confuse the fk out of me. But gaining more experience helps a bit. As does repeating those behaviors even despite not understanding it in the feely way. 

By the way, did you guys know that plenty of schizoids I know (including myself) have this weird habbit of smiling way too much without any solid reason when trying to communicate with non-schizoid people?

I even heard somewhere it’s sort of an optional criteria to tell schizoids from other similar conditions. While emotionally flat, many, if not most would smile by default at random when they don’t know a fitting reaction. At least I know I do that a lot. Or at least used to do, but at some point I started to control it consciously to not confuse people with accidental fake smiles on serious subjects. >.> 

Literal conversation from my college years:

Fellow student: oh have you heard, yday I lost my phone?

Me: *smiles* Nope, haven’t heard that. 

Fellow student: funny, huh *sounds offended* 

Me: *keeps smiling* no, why would it? It’s sad. *fakes the neatest smile possible to pass for an actual human being*

Fellow student: right... *leaves and never talks to me until we graduate*

[tipsoctopus]

"Garbage", "Nonsense" - Many Liverpool fans aren't having this surprising transfer story

Liverpool fans have taken to Twitter to state their disbelief at claims that Naby Keita will be sold after just one season at the club.

It has been reported that the Reds are set to cash in on the Guinean international having only signed him back in the summer, and are willing to take a £10m loss on the 24-year-old after a disappointing campaign.

Are the media letting Jurgen Klopp off lightly for his lack of silverware? The Pl>ymaker FC squad have their say in the video below…

Jurgen Klopp chose to bed the former RB Leipzig man in slowly, before giving him his first real run in the team last month in a period where Keita made four successive starts. Despite impressing in those games, the midfielder has since dropped out of the team and hasn’t made a start since.

He has hardly been a flop, but it wouldn’t be unfair to say that Liverpool fans were expecting a lot more from the second most expensive signing in their history.

Given how hard Liverpool battled to get Keita to Anfield, fighting off Barcelona in the process, the Reds supporters on Twitter find it hard to believe that he will be moved on so quickly…

Liverpool are ready to cut their losses on Naby Keita after only a season at Anfield, with Klopp happy to lose £10m on him.

Keita’s representatives have already held talks with Bayern and Dortmund to try and bring him back to the Bundesliga. [The Mirror]

Shocking if true. pic.twitter.com/RDszLIlbwv

— Anfield Edition (@AnfieldEdition) March 24, 2019

The same mirror that reported yday that Gerrard was booed when he was told to shoot. I understand you’re a news page, but you’re adding fuel to the fire by reposting this garbage. It circulates across social media and adds unnecessary drama to our title race

— . (@hskr135) March 24, 2019

Not long ago these people were reporting that lfc will sell Fabinho to PSG during Jan window ?

— LFC Stats (@SportsMaths) March 24, 2019

Well most of the media have been trying to put pressure on us and upset #LFC all season and we keep responding with our results.Hopefully this is just another sad attempt to upset us by linking our players with moves away from Anfield. ?

— KP (@appydaze70) March 24, 2019

I would say totally fake news story, why would Klopp sell him so soon.

— The Anfield Daily (@AnfieldDaily1) March 24, 2019

The same Klopp who has shown loyalty to Dejan Lovren for 3 years. Yeah alright pal…

— Chris Riley (@Crsriley) March 24, 2019

Yeah okay then I’ll be shocked if he goes after a season when we have lallana Alberto Still there after years

— . (@alad12346) March 24, 2019

Next joke

— Yohan (@Yohannes_7512) March 24, 2019

Nonsense

— Koven Pillay (@koven_pillay) March 24, 2019

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[hoebihoeshi]

ok so I'm in Anaheim, totally not fucking ready to see BTS tomorrow. I wanted to make a lil post for the conclusion of Wings Adventure Day 01! It's 12:30 A.M. in California right now which means it's 3:30 A.M. in Florida and I've been up for over 24 hours. we left for the airport in Orlando at 3 in the morning yday, after abt two hours of sleep on a virtual stranger's floor. it's not her fault and she's nice and she's friends with Brittainie's friend but it wasn't great. our Uber driver started playing salsa music and at first I was like wtf it's too early for this but honestly? it was perfect. after weeks of fretting over whether my personal item would be too large + my luggage would be too heavy, I discovered my personal item was enermously small (a drawstring bag) and my luggage was only 7 lbs. (we were allowed 40 lbs.) got through security just fine and waited for the plane which came and took off right on time. it was my first time riding a plane so I was a little nervous but I listened to Outro: Wings and it was perfect. also YNWA and MAMA. Brittainie recorded it for me. I was pretty scared. we landed in Atlanta right on time, it was a quick hour long flight, and we had a three hour layover there. Brittainie and I went to a little sit-down placed and shared a pulled pork sandwich (to add to the granola bars that we had for breakfast, one each). at this point it was like 9 or 10 a.m. we waited until our next flight took off, in time, at noon. four hours to LAX. we made it again on time. I read a lot of shit about Spirit airlines before we went but honestly, my experience was great!!! I mean it is as advertised. ppl bitch abt what they knew going in, ok. anyway it was like 2 p.m., we met up with another girl (a friend of the friend of Brittainie's friend) and we spent like two hours trying to find the rental place and get this new girl a rental car. listen, L.A. kind of sucks. traffic was wild and people can't drive. it seemed like all the buildings n stores were empty and everyone in the city was just manically driving around w no real destination. it look us like two hours to get to Anaheim, we went through the exhaustive process of trying to get into our sketchy AIRBNB (it's actually pretty nice but I won't go into details). new girl and stranger friend went back to L.A. for God knows what reason. and Brittainie, Raven, and I took an Uber to this place called Mr. BBQ. it's a Korean BBQ place and there were ppl crowded outside when we arrived around 7:30, put in our name after ten minutes or so, were told it'd be an hour and forty five minute wait. whatever, we were cool with it. we kind of expected it to take shorter, and really hadn't eaten anything and had barely slept, so we started losing it a little bit. they were singing every single BTS and SHINee song they could think of to get the wait buzzer to go off...it took a little over two hours but we FINALLY sat down with like forty five minutes until the place closed and we WENT OFF. ordered pork belly and bulgogi first, the banchan came, and Raven ordered a bottle of soju...and suddenly everything became so much better. how do I even explain this...ok first of all, all of the banchan was great, there was so much of it, and whenever we finished one thing they'd bring something totally different. Brittainie was ready to die for pickled radish. the bulgogi was fucking amazing, pork belly was good, we also got teriyaki chicken and beef spareribs, and then topped it off with spicy garlic pork butt and MORE bulgogi. the pork butt n the bulgogi were the best! it was an all you can eat place so we weren't skimping. but the best part was all of the soju shots...I'd say we all had about ten shots...I lost rock paper scissors and had to drink the last shot, so I guess I had eleven. holy shit. Brittainie went live and I've sobered way up by now but I'm so excited to watch that and watch us get progressively more wasted as it went on. we were definitely messy. every twenty fucking minutes they'd play a loud birthday song and then whatever hype song they could think of, so we started taking bday shots for everybody...and then they even brought free ice cream which made everything sssooooo worth it. it was amazing. I'm still amazed. every single thing abt tonight was great, and our Uber driver back to our weekend place was so nice, and we found fucking pancake mix and water guns here. Wings Adventure is off to a good start, I'll see u on the other side after BTS kills me tomorrow