#still sticking to my convictions and not watching the show tho

[schrodingers-hoarding-problem]

what i learned today from being on ql tumblr is that great is somehow more insane than vegas and tbh i love him for that

also that theres more timeline stuff that i do not have the brain capacity for but good for yall and i do mean that

[silvertsundere]

Silver Talks AniManga (30/06/24)

alright with this, this season is offically over for me and it was p good overall despite some worse than they coulda been adaptations

next week starts the next season tho there's not a ton of stuff starting for me right away

blue - finale/completed

Anime

Blue Archive Ep12 (Finale)

Considering how much money BA makes this was pretty disappointing, it could've been so much better. While the op looked good the rest of the show looked weird, like it had some filter over it. I thought maybe it was cause, since there isn't a simulcast, of some weird encoding of the video but then the op would look off too. But anyway, other than that the animation was serviceable but never anything impressive. The music was good ofc but it was just the game's tracks so that's to be expected (with a couple remixes here and there), and the voice cast was also good. The best thing about the anime was all the extra original scenes they had, which were all good and added to the original story.

It's been a week since the finale aired and this post and there hasn't been a S2 announced so that's unfortunate. As much as I like the abydos girls, the arisu story and eden treaty are just waaaaay better than this. I understand that it's an intro to the world and such, and it does a good job of that but I'd like to see those other chapters animated as well. Tho, if they do it, I hope they step up the quality cause they for sure can do it if they want

TL;DR: Good to watch if you're a fan of the game if not just to just the girls animated and the original scenes and it's also a decent enough adaptation for people that are interested but didn't want to play for whatever reason, tho there's some cameos and references that would fly over your head at some points

Girls Band Cry Ep13 (Finale)

well that was a good show. was balancing between an 8 and a 9 but after the finale decided to go with the 8. biggest reason for this is cause I have it in the same headspace as jellyfish so liked it more "so clearly it should have a higher score" but obviously they can both be 8s and I still liked one more, but anyway. Really good, single handedly made me change my mind about CG shows, tho it's an unfair comparison to other people since this was toei and they have experience with Precure and more recently the DBS Hero movie

I won't yap about this one too much like I do sometimes. If you were interested in the show but put off cause it's CG then don't and just check it out. The story is about sticking to your convictions even when "everyone" seems to doubt you, but also to learn to open up and rely on your friends and family cause you're, ultimately, not alone. The whole cast was really fun and had great chemistry, tho I feel like Tomo and Rupa coulda gotten a bit more development if they joined earlier in the season and despite all of Nina's faults that they make sure to portray correctly, she is a nice MC that you want to see succeed and root for. The music was really good, as you'd expect from a music show. A lot of eps ended with a concert performance with a full on MV included, instead of the ED, and they were always pretty cool

I said I wouldn't yap much but starting to do it so TL;DR: Watch it despite being CG, it's a fun show and well worth the watch. Wouldn't mind getting some more in the future but I don't see it happening considering how it ended but oh well

Oh also, I think I mentioned it in the first ep? But anyway, I love nari (the chara designer) so it was great seeing their stuff animated like this. I've followed them for years and years and years so it's cool seeing their progress and participating in a big project. Hoping for more good things for them in the future

Kaiju 8 Ep 12

Well that was sadly pretty disappointing. Now don't get me wrong, I know the series is pretty generic, but the manga is good enough that it elevates it above that. The manga was already very popular long before the anime even got announced so they wanted to make the anime a hit too, which lead them to playing it too safe and trying to appeal to the mainstream audience, making it lack the juice that makes the manga so good. We had little flashes of this through out the show with a couple scenes here and there, ep 9 (the best one), 11 and 12 were very good, and if the whole series had had that level of quality it would've been a much better show but oh well. I said this many times but the decision to have the OP and ED done by generic radio pop western artists was such a huge red flag, that completely showed their intentions, but I still had hope

Like if something like Jujutsu can become such a smash hit, despite the plot being so all over the place, due to the simple fact that they let the anime staff cook and make something different and unique, it should show you that trying to appeal to the most milquetoast anime watcher isn't the way and that's just gonna make your show enjoyable but forgettable to that target audience and serviceable but disappointing to your existing fans. Oh well.. it's a shame but it is what it

Anyway, as expected, they announced S2 shortly after the finale. I'll be looking forward to that and hoping it'll be better but I don't have much hope it won't be just more of the same

Manga

Kyokuto Necromance Ch10

the series hasn't been doing hot in ratings but this chap had the axe vibes all over it so I guess that's enough confirmation. it's unfortunate that this author has another cancelled series on his hands. I thought this one had potential, maybe not to be a hit, but at least to last for a while. And like I understand why people are not vibing with it but it's still a shame, oh well

[crystalstar8]

Knights of the Night (ch 21)

Chapter 21

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9, ch 10, ch 11, ch 12, ch 13, ch 14, ch 15, ch 16, ch 17, ch 18, ch 19, ch 20, ch 21

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 2,998

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France, human trafficking

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j  @daechwitad-2​ @zobadak​ @fallenstar-7​​​

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing...

TW: violence, gore, graphic descriptions of gore

(sorry for the wait, but it think it turned out pretty good, if i do say so myself. Also, i just don't know what to do for the pictures anymore lol.)

“Just so we’re clear, you’re probably not going to use this thing the day of,” said Jimmy K. “You two and Jin are gonna be evacuating the captives while the rest of us fight. All this training is just in case.”

               “I know,” said Jungkook. “I still want to learn how to use it.”

               The heavy double propane tanks were strapped to Jungkook’s back, the hose in hand.

               “It’s pretty easy,” said Jimmy K. “Just open the valve and pull the trigger.”

               Training with Jimmy K was fun but grueling. They had been doing target practice for hours, which was tedious. By the time evening hit, Catalina’s shoulder hurt and she just wanted to see her boyfriend use a flamethrower. She wasn’t disappointed. He was downright giddy as he twisted the valve open on the tank behind his head, then blasted the practice dummies. The dummies, along with all the arrows sticking out of them, burst into flames. Jungkook laughed gleefully, the light of the fire glinting in his eyes.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               She couldn’t move, and the metal against her neck was pressing harder. She wished she could reach out for Jimin’s hand beside her, but he couldn’t move either. She wished Jungkook wouldn’t look at her like that, with dread and desperation in his eyes. She wished he wouldn’t try so hard to get to her, she didn’t want him to die too. He needed to get out safely. She tried to open her mouth to tell him that, but then the hand holding the knife to her throat moved and the last thing she heard was a scream.

               “Cat! Wake up!”

               Catalina woke with a start, sweating, tears streaming down her face. She was in her room.

               “Cat?”

               She startled again, her heart still pounding before she saw Jungkook beside her. He was looking at her with concern, a hand reaching out to cup her face.

               “You were having a nightmare,” he said. Catalina sighed and closed her eyes, leaning into his palm.

               “I don’t remember it,” she said. That was a lie. She did remember it, but she didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t know what all these dreams meant and she didn’t want to. She felt him pull her closer and wrap his arms around her.

               “Go back to sleep,” he said. “No more dreams tonight.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

               The mansion was packed. Well, the foyer was packed. When Catalina and Jungkook arrived, they were surprised to see so many people, so many vampires, already there. The unfamiliar faces stared at them as they pushed through the crowd.

               They found Hoseok in the back of the lounge, playing on his phone on the couch.

               “This is a party in here,” said Catalina.

               “Yeah, Namjoon’s friends from up north got here yesterday,” said Hoseok. “Can you believe this is all one clan?”

               “Out there?” Jungkook asked. “That’s all one group? There’s like twenty of them out there!”

               “Is he expecting more?” asked Catalina.

               “I don’t think so,” said Hoseok. “Namjoon already went over the plan with them over night. Most of them don’t even care a whole lot about saving humans, they’re just in it for fun. I guess it’s okay, as long as the job gets done.”

               “True,” said Catalina. “We’ll need all the help we can get. So, we’re doing this thing tonight? Are you nervous?”

               Hoseok thought for a moment before turning to her and saying, “They ruined my life. I’m fine now that I have these guys, but I could have finished college and done something with myself. And they ruined that chance for me. So, I think I’m ready to end them.”

               The conviction in his eyes was almost startling to Catalina. She’s never seen him like this, but it made her happy. He was ready to take his life back.

               “Are you ready?” Jungkook asked Catalina, taking her hand.

               “I think so,” she said. “I want this to end.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

               They arrived at the same time as the police. Catalina waited outside the entrance for the signal. Emergency vehicles lined the perimeter, ambulances opening their doors and readying themselves for patients.

“How many do you think will be in there?” she asked Namjoon. He looked confidant ordering the vampires around, but he hesitated when he answered.

“There should be no more than thirty,” he said. He sounded sure of himself, but Catalina caught a flash of nervousness in his eyes. She looked over at her other friends. Yoongi was dressed in a tracksuit, an ornate sword on his hip. His grip was tight, knuckles white. Taehyung looked fierce and determined, but he was chewing on his lip and pacing. Hoseok looked the most nervous, picking at his already torn sleeves, eyeing the building with trepidation.

They called themselves immortal, but Catalina knew they weren’t. They were just as nervous as she was.

She watched Jimmy K lead the vampires into the building, one small group at a time. She watched Namjoon, Taehyung, Yoongi, and Hoseok go in. She waited three minutes, then went in herself. She knew Namjoon was going to try to find Makai and make a deal first. If that didn’t work, they would fight. Catalina hoped it wouldn’t come to that, but as she descended the stairs and entered the tunnel, she knew it wasn’t going well. Voices bounced off the cement walls, mixing with the clanging of her footsteps against the metal floor. As soon as she reached the end of the tunnel, one of Namjoon’s friends, Priya, Catalina remembered, met her there.

Priya supposedly had very good hypnotic abilities, even against other vampires, which was why Namjoon chose her as their cover. She would make sure Catalina, Jungkook, and Jin got in and out without being seen. Catalina never got the chance to witness those abilities, so she just had to trust Namjoon’s word for it.

The fight had broken out in the central part of the basement. She couldn’t see her friends, but she didn’t want to spend too much time searching for them in the chaos. She needed to focus on her task. Catalina made it to the first door. The metal lock mechanism was tight and she had to get Priya’s help opening it. Once it was opened, she rushed to the person inside. It was a pale woman, lips so blue and eyes so sunken, Catalina would have assumed her to be dead in she hadn’t cracked her eyes open.

After taking the needle out and checking for any other wounds, she asked, “Do you think you can walk?”

The woman just stared at her, so Catalina lifted the woman’s arm and draped it over her shoulders, helping the woman to her feet. She was almost dead weight at first, surprisingly light, but then she slowly started shuffling her feet, trying her best to stay upright. A loud boom shook the ground, making Catalina flinch.

As fast as they could, they made their way back to the tunnel. Catalina glanced into the crowd. Across the giant room, an entire wall was destroyed, dust still in the air. She still couldn’t see her friends.

Jungkook and Jin, along with two police officers met them at the bottom of the stairs. The officers took the woman from Catalina.

“It sounds bad,” said Jungkook, his eyes wide.

“I can’t really tell what’s happening,” said Catalina. “I didn’t see any of them.”

Jungkook squeezed her hand once before heading down the tunnel with Priya.

“I’ll be quick,” he said.

Catalina watched him go. The sounds of the battle seemed to get louder. A scream broke through the noise, but it didn’t sound like someone she knew. She hoped Jungkook was staying safe. Waiting for him to return was agony. She didn’t know what she would do if he got hurt. Her worry must have been showing through, because Jin put a hand on her shoulder.

Two more officers came downstairs and waited with them.

By the time ten minutes passed, Catalina was shaking. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the entrance of the tunnel.

Footsteps echoed against the metal floor and Catalina’s heart sped up. When she saw Jungkook round the corner, she felt the tension melt off of her. He was carrying a young man in his arms and the woman hobbling beside him was clutching his arm and leaning into him. He passed the young man off to the officers, one of them carrying the man, the other helping the woman up the stairs.

As soon as Jungkook’s arms were free, Catalina threw herself at him. Jin took off down the tunnel with Priya next.

She didn’t let go of Jungkook for several minutes.

“Did you see them?” she asked. He shook his head.

The two officers from before came down the stairs and about a minute later, Jin appeared, helping someone down the tunnel.

The three of them continued like this, eventually trying their best to pick up two or three people each time.

The battle seemed to be calming down, and the next time Catalina went in, she noticed that almost everyone was either subdued or standing around. Someone was talking at the other side of the crowd, but she couldn’t see who it was, she couldn’t tell by the voice either. She still couldn’t see her friends.

The hallway was almost all open doors and empty rooms now. There were only a few left at the end of the hall. If the people inside could walk, she would try to get all of them at once.

Before she could reach the end of the hallway, a woman stepped out from one of the rooms, blocking them from going any further. Catalina recognized her as the blonde woman, Amanda. She was just as glamorous as she remembered, her blonde hair cascading over her shoulder, her red lips curled into a sinister smile.

Priya stepped in front of Catalina.

“Just go back to the others,” said Priya. “They must be looking for you.”

“I can smell her,” said Amanda. “You’re trying to hide her from me, but I know her scent. She’s right behind you, isn’t she?”

Priya didn’t say anything, she just clenched her fists at her sides.

“You don’t have to try anymore,” said Amanda. “I know her scent from the field. And when she visited us pretending to be Yoongi’s familiar.”

Catalina realized with a start that she never saw Amanda that day they bought Jimin. Which meant she was watching them the whole time, keeping herself unseen. Catalina felt a shiver run down her spine.

“We have your little friend,” said Amanda. “He’s our bargaining chip. Would you like to join him? It’ll pack a bigger punch if we have two of their pets instead of one.”

Priya growled and stepped forward. She didn’t get much of a chance to attack before Amanda lunged at her, faster than Catalina could even see. Amanda made quick work of Priya, wrestling her to the ground and snapping her neck so far around, her flesh was torn and her dead eyes stared at the ceiling as her chest hit the floor.

Catalina turned around and ran. She ran into an adjoining hallway, taking turns down tunnels she had no idea existed. She didn’t look back to see if Amanda was behind her. She ran until her lungs burned.

Where was she? She didn’t recognize this part of the facility. It looked like a service tunnel; cement walls were covered in pipes and access panels. The ground was metal grating, just like the entrance tunnel. Red, caged lights sparsely lined the bottom of the walls. The red light did nothing to calm her fear. Amanda wasn’t behind her. How? She was faster, Catalina shouldn’t stand a chance.

If I can get to Namjoon, or any of the others, they’ll protect me, she thought. But she didn’t know how to get back. She couldn’t stop moving though. The twists and turns were almost labyrinthine, taking her further and further away from her friends. Further away from her safety. That’s when another thought crossed her mind.

The longer she was gone, the more likely Jungkook was to go looking for her. And that was the last thing she wanted. They already had Jimin, or that’s what she thought anyway. She assumed that’s what Amanda was insinuating.

“Here, kitty kitty,” Amanda’s voice echoed throughout the tunnel. “If you keep running, you’ll run into some monsters down here. And pretty kitties like you will most certainly get eaten by the monsters.”

Catalina couldn’t see Amanda anywhere, but her voice sent a chill through her. Where has she heard those words before? Where has she seen this tunnel before? The familiar burn in her lungs forced her to stop and catch her breath.

Why did it feel like Catalina had already done all this?

A shadow dropped from the ceiling in front of her. Before she could scream, Amanda lunged at her and slapped a hand over her mouth.

“Where’s your other human friends?” she asked. “Where’s the pretty one with the big eyes?”

The hand over her mouth didn’t let up, so Catalina couldn’t answer even if she wanted to. Amanda wasn’t waiting around for an answer though. Catalina’s arms were secured behind her back with ease and she was forced to walk. They somehow made it out of the winding tunnels and to Makai’s office unnoticed.

Laying on one of the couches was Jimin, bound and gagged. Catalina’s eyes widened.

“Yeah, I wondered why I recognized this guy when we first got him,” said Makai. He was sitting behind his desk, looking over at Jimin. “I thought maybe I had run into him somewhere in town, or maybe at my yoga lessons on Thursdays. But then Yoongi bought him, and I realized he was one of the humans at the baseball field that day. I can’t believe it took me so long to figure it out! Yoongi was a good actor that day, wasn’t he?”

Catalina didn’t answer.

“Yeah, you guys were good,” said Makai. “And at first, it was fine. He bought his friend back. No big deal. At the end of the day, I still got paid and could keep doing what I was doing. But then you all came in here and wrecked my stuff. It made me kind of sad. I really did like Yoongi. I thought he was cool. I thought his whole clan was cool! Don’t worry, I’m not going to kill them. At least I’ll try not to. I want to work a deal out with them, and that’s where you come in.”

“It’s just a harmless trade,” said Amanda.

“Right! It sounds like they’re talking out there right now, so let’s go out there and see if we can work something out,” said Makai. His smile then disappeared as he stood up from behind the desk. He pulled out two large pocket knives, opening one and handing the other to Amanda. If it’s a harmless trade, why do they have those?, Catalina thought. She didn’t want to die today. She didn’t want Jimin to die and she hoped to God Jungkook stuck to the plan because she didn’t want him to die either.

Makai hauled Jimin to his feet and pushed him out the door. Amanda shoved Catalina after them.

The battle was still halted. Namjoon was at the front of the crowd, speaking with a woman. Mohati. Catalina remembered her from the baseball field. Yoongi was beside him. Taehyung was there as well, a subdued vampire on the ground under his knee.

“ALRIGHT, EVERYONE SHUT UP!” Makai bellowed. The crowd went silent and everyone’s attention was brought to the two vampires and their human captives. Catalina saw Namjoon’s eyes widen at the sight of them. She saw panic flash through Taehyung’s eyes. He almost stood up. She couldn’t see where Hoseok was. She hoped he was okay.

Makai began speaking, addressing mainly Namjoon. They argued, but Catalina couldn’t focus on the conversation over her own pounding heartbeat. Namjoon took a step forward and Amanda brought her knife to Catalina’s throat. Makai did the same with Jimin. His eyes were wide and terrified. He was staring at Taehyung, who matched his expression. Catalina squeezed her eyes closed. The metal dug into her neck. She swore it was breaking the skin. She could hear Jimin’s panicked breathing and she wanted to reach a hand out to him, but her arms were held in an iron grip. Another voice made her eyes fly open.

Jungkook had pushed through the crowd and Yoongi was now holding him back from approaching. Catalina met his eyes. She never wanted to see that kind of terror in his eyes. That pain. She never wanted to see him crying the way he was. Catalina felt tears well up in her own eyes at the sight.

“…you know we can’t let you do that,” Namjoon was saying. “There has to be something we can work out…”

Catalina assumed Makai wanted to bribe Namjoon into letting him continue his organization. She assumed Namjoon was trying to work out a way to not let that happen, but without casualties. Blood was rushing in her ears and the only thing she could focus on was Jungkook. She wanted to tell him not to do anything rash. He needed to stay alive. He needed to get out of this unharmed.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of movement. A vampire she didn’t recognize tried to attack Makai. Namjoon yelled at him to stop, but it was too late. The vampire was tackled by Mohati and the last thing Catalina heard was Jungkook, screaming her name, before she felt the searing pain of the knife dragging across her throat.

Within seconds, her hearing went out, her vision went dark, and before her mind went blank, she prayed she was the only one dying today.

[winterysomnium]

just realised i forgot the ship WangXian kiss print #18

slides in five months later hi hello I have answered the prompt even tho it took me like half a year I’m so sorry

it also wasn’t supposed to be this long but it sorta ran away from me and wherever your fic goes you gotta follow tbh lol. thank you so much for prompting! ♥ means so much to me.

AO3 link here 

(tumblr kinda messed up the format so it might be easier to read on AO3 honestly)

—

the borders of you (untouched);WangXian; 5,900+ words;

Wei Ying creates a talisman that’s supposed to keep all the fierce corpses and beasts away. Problem is, it keeps away everyone, living people included. And worst of all? It’s not going away. (prompt 18:kisses where one person is sitting in the other’s lap)

—

It’s not that Wei Ying has messed up.

The ward works,works well, as it has kept Wen Ning about four feet away from him from everyangle and he hasn’t been able to break through the barrier, not even after theadded strain of several fierce corpses that have been roaming the remote villagefor days on end.

Therefore, his inscription can’t be incorrect in thatsense, no. It’s just … the ward works toowell, is the thing.

When the paper burned up and the hour mark has passed,Wen Ning is still unable to get anywhere nearer, bounced back against the invisiblebarrier like a stone, skipping across the surface of a lake. Not only that: noone else has been able to either. Notany of the villagers, their grateful bows directed towards the Lan juniors andtheir liquor bottles towards Wei Ying, not any of the juniors and not even LanShizui, increasingly worried the more the sun dips, low into the horizon.

At last, knowing that he must have made a mistake ortwo somewhere, Wei Ying watches as a birdcan’t sit on a branch when he stands underneath it, watches on as the curiouscat that has been sniffing at the robes of every unknown person, keeps pawing atthe barrier with a bit of irritation at the tip of her tail.

It isn’t trulyworrying Wei Ying yet. He can touch the liquor bottle and drink from it justfine, and some talismans were known to dissipate after half a night’s time at earliest.Maybe he added a stroke too many to his blueprint, strengthening and prolongingthe effect inadvertently.

He couldn’t have accidentally created a full on permanentbarrier, he knows that, because thereis no visible or spiritual writing anywhere on his clothes or his person andhis paper prototype has been ashes as soon as he surged his powers through itsform.

So he convinces the juniors to stay for dinner andsettle in for the night; it’s past everyone’s bedtime and the comforting scent ofsoup and roasting meat painfully flares the hunger in Wei Ying’s stomach,overriding any lasting thoughts of worry or anxious fears.

His mood doesdip slightly when he realizes he can’t truly share the table with anyone, thesweet taste of the sugar spun fruits souring in his mouth with every lonelybite. He’s gotten too used to this easy kind of company, to Lan Zhan’s quiet,steady presence, his fingers never too far from Wei Ying’s aid, from gettingtangled up with Wei Ying’s own. He’s gotten used to the bundle of juniors followinghim around during the classes he teaches (to Lan Qiren’s unending chagrin) andhe almost misses JingYi’s – a little tooloud – voice right next to his ear.

His exasperated huff must reach all the way across thetavern, because Lan Shizui stands as close as he can to his table now, hiseyebrows etched with something nervous and small. He pauses as he tests the wardonce more, with the tip of his shoe.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t head back right away,Senior Wei?” he asks, ever considerate and Wei Ying sees Lan WangJi’s teachingsfilling out A-Yuan’s shoulders, the chambers of his heart. It makes him missLan Zhan suddenly, with a pang of something sore, like swallowing a painfulgulp of water, feeling it travel all the way down his throat.

He rubs his sternum through his robes, the phantomfeeling making him feel silly (they’ve been gone for barely a day and a half) as he shakes his head.“There’s no point in leaving this late. We’ll arrive too late for breakfast ifwe do, anyway,” he reasons, but A-Yuan’s face stays cautious, eyebrows drawn. (He’stoo good of a child, honestly, Wei Ying thinks.)

“What if theward isn’t gone in the morning?” he asks and Wei Ying drinks another cup ofwine, just to dissipate the distant, cold restlessness stuck at the back of hisskull. There’s no need to be worried, yet.

But it must be a question that’s not just runningthrough Shizui’s mind, because the white robes of the juniors have gotten muchcloser now, JingYi’s questioning look clearly convicting him of eavesdropping,alongside with the others, craning their necks in a – fully inconspicuous –way.

Wei Ying feels a smile graze his face as he watchesthem quietly strain their ears, despite how obvious they are, how much he stillhas to teach them.

(Are they even trying to hide their curiosity at all?)

“Then it won’t matter if I find out here or in theJingshi,” he decides to come back to the question, answering it firmly, decisionmade.

(It’ll just worry Lan Zhan if they arrive and theeffects are not gone, he adds, for only his heart to hear.)

He gets up, brushing out his robes, stepping aroundthe table. Worrying Lan Zhan is one of the last things he ever wants to do.

Copying his movement, the juniors stand up from theirempty bowls and reserve a tired bow to the owner as they head up the stairs totheir bedrooms, quiet enough not to wake anyone else. Shizui and JingYi are thelast in line and they reluctantly look over at Wei Wuxian as he stands at theentrance of his own room, the dissatistified look on JingYi’s face so much morevisible than the slight crook of Shizui’s eyebrows, the corner of his lips.

JingYi opens his mouth, undoubtedly to argue Shizui’spoint again in a more, well, JingYiway, but Wei Ying is faster, interrupting him as soon as he takes in a slightlybigger breath.

“Go to bed. Worry about the report you’ll have towrite, if you want to think about something,” he tells them, with a smile thatis just a little bit too fond and after a moment of decision between arguingfurther and just letting it be for the night, they slowly step over thethreshold of their room, closing the door behind them, softly and slow. WeiYing lets himself collapse onto the single bed of his, a little too stiff underhis weight but clean and with thick covers and a pillow so soft it begs for himto stick his face in.

He really should take his own advice, he thinks as ayawn cracks through the bones of his jaw; his thoughts scattered across theheavy set of his mind. He thinks of Lan Zhan, of a symbol he might have torewrite on the talisman, of Lan Zhan’s chest rising and falling, the lullaby ofbeing there that he plays to Wei Yingevery night.

He doesn’t recall anything after that.

—

Wei Ying knows he’s stalling. He’s decided to stay inCaiyi Town for lunch, sending the juniors ahead and idling about the riverbank, picking all the deserted spots so as not to raise too much attention,twirling Chenqing and wondering just howhe’ll explain this to Lan Zhan so that his mouth and brows don’t curl into thatconcerned shape like they do whenever he does something detrimentally stupid,usually to himself.

He doesn’t get far beyond the edge of the town after hefinally starts up the journey up themountain when he spots him, the afternoon trailing across his robes, awakeningthe woven patterns as Lan WangJi walks towards him, regal and ethereal asalways; even more so with the sun gingerly touching his features between thetrees.

(The same sun feels suddenly way too warm on WeiYing’s own neck.)

“Lan Zhan!” He greets him, happily, despite theprevious moments of avoidance: something about this man just reassures him tothe deepest parts of his soul, calls him to be paid attention by.

Lan WangJi pauses, stands at the exact border of thecharm, tracing the unseen outlines with his eyes before he carefully extendshis fingers, the tips pressing against the ward.  

“Wei Ying,” he answers, in a tone hard to describe:relief, concern, affection, each atthe tip of a different finger, a different note.

(Wei Ying’s heart is an instrument, lovingly played.)

“Don’t look so worried, Lan Zhan! My dearestHanGuangJun,” Wei Ying smiles and it’s never been so difficult to keep still,to keep away from that beautiful face in front of him, kissable and dear. “I’mperfectly fine, see? Aiya, the children must have been telling you all kinds ofgruesome stuff, haven’t they?” he twirls around just to show he can, thatthere’s nothing hurt or aching (besides his poor heart, trying to press itselfout of his ribcage, pulled towards Lan WangJi’s own).

Lan WangJi watches, a stern look slowly seeping intohis features, a sigh buried deep within his lungs. He’s not fooled and Wei Yingknows this, all too well.

“Shizui said no creature living or dead can get closeto you,” Lan WangJi answers and an aborted twitch of his arm belies the intentto hold, to try to defy the limits of whatever Wei Ying has created, despitethe impossibility of it all.

(It’s more painful than Wei Ying imagined it would be,if he’s honest with himself.)

(He’s not.)

He lets out a sigh, tracing the invention he’s stuckin through the air, each stroke a confident memory. “I must have strengthenedthe effect of the charm with a stroke too many somewhere. I already have a fewideas to try out,” he promises and while Lan WangJi still doesn’t look happy, probablythinking: how many have you tried already,unsuccessfully?, he nods anyway, aligns himself at Wei Ying’s side as closeas can be, always beside him, always a guardian of Wei Ying’s own.

“Let’s go back,” he says and the smile Wei Ying feelsblooming on his own face is positively hurting his cheeks. He grins, relieved. “Let’sgo home, Lan Zhan,” he agrees, pleased at the warm hue enveloping Lan WangJi’sears like little buds of flowers.

No touches needed for Lan Zhan’s ears to go warm, henotes, fondly amused.

(Thoroughly in love.)

—

Neither of them can sleep peacefully that night. LanWangJi forfeits his bed to sleep at the other side of the room, even when Wei Yinghimself protests profusely against it (to no avail).

If it’s the unfamiliar scenery of their empty bed orsimply being too far away from Lan WangJi himself he can’t tell, but not evenWei Ying’s usual bedtime can lull him to sleep. He misses the satisfied achesof a night well spent, of loving and being loved in Lan Zhan’s arms and feelingeach of his touches bitten into his skin; the only pain he’s currently feelingis the unpleasant twitch at his back as he slumps over the table, scribblingnonsense into his notes.

So maybe he hasmessed up. He’s studied every stroke’s direction and count on his blueprint,has corrected all the places he felt unsure about and yet, not one modificationhas worked one bit. He’s cast tens of reverse charms, trying to unweave the spellhe’s trapped himself in but nothing has changed: the space he’s isolated inhasn’t shrunk and not even one of the bunnies has been able to hop through tonibble at his robes (he’s been baiting them with carrots all evening so thatthey would actually get near enough to him, too).

Wei Ying doesn’t think he’s an impatient person. He’snot patient per se, either, but he’s able to withstand things. To persevere.He’s lived through enough to know that he’ll thrive in places others go to to becondemned and damned: he’ll root through the soil and he’ll rise like a lotusflower, crawling through to live, to resurface, to be plucked by Lan Zhan’skindness, by his heart.

Perhaps Wei Ying’s been spoiled. Spoiled by Lan Zhan’svery own hands and very own warmth: he simply doesn’t want to struggle anymore.He wants instead, yearns, he wantscomfort and softness and affection and he’s frustrated when it’s this close yetout of his reach altogether. It’s in the very room they share, in the robesthey store in the same place, in the kisses they wear on each other’s lips;they’re two strings bound together.

And now they’re like two parallel rivers, longing toget closer but held apart by earth itself, by soil and trees, the miles inbetween.

Wei Ying must have been worn down by Lan Zhan’s love,a stone sanded down to a grain, because he’s frustrated and unsettled, alonein a choice of his own making. But maybe it’s Lan Zhan’s fault too, just alittle bit, Wei Ying thinks, petulant. Just for all the ways he has indulgedWei Ying, spoiled him to pieces.

It’s completely unfair.

As if responding to his thoughts, Lan WangJi shiftsunder his blanket and his face turns towards Wei Ying’s, laid down on the table,the feeble cushion of own his arms. Lan WangJi’s still asleep and Wei Ying letsout a quiet huff, just to conquer the need to curse at his own stupid luck, thegrind of his frustration.

“Lan Zhan,” he whines, quietly, barely a sound underhis breath. “How unlucky is it of me to have you so near yet unable to touchyou at all? How miserable is this fate of ours, keeping us apart like this?Truly such rotten luck,” he complains, letting the childish words run theircourse, soothe the fear guarding the back of his throat.

He tiredly follows the slope of Lan WangJi’s nose withhis eyes, the bow of his mouth, the press of his chest, the dips and highs ofhis knuckles; falls asleep to the longing of a man dying at an empty well.

He wakes up confused and sleepy, thoughts still sunkenunder the syrupy pull of a dream, a blanket stolen from their bed slipping downhis shoulders as he raises his head and blinks: Lan WangJi is sits across fromhim, a cup of tea in hand.

“Lan Zhan, good morning,” Wei Ying, smiles, softly,but purses his lips upon noticing where he’s slept, confused. “Why am I sleepingon the table? And why are you sitting so far away and not right next to me?” heasks through a stretch and a yawn; what a strange morning it is. Usually Lan WangJinever lets him get away with falling asleep on the table or in the bathtub andalways carries him off, carries him right into their bed –

“Oh,” the memory falls on him like a bucket of water, cuttinghis stretch short. Lan WangJi simply pushes a steaming bowl across the table:the bowl inches closer over to where Wei Ying has pillowed his head on hisarms, but Lan WangJi’s own fingers cannot pass beyond the outer edge of hisnotes.

“Still here, huh,” Wei Ying comments and Lan WangJinods; pushes more insistently. It must be close to lunch time, the air insideof the Jingshi warm and fragrant, the afternoon outside inviting itself inwithin a soft breeze.

“Eat your breakfast,” Lan WangJi says, picking up hisown cup again, carefully adjusting his sleeve. Wei Ying accepts the hot bowl ofcongee, sipping at its contents and contemplates, grazing his lips across therim.

He vaguely feels fifteen again, waiting for Lan WangJito look his way, to pay attention to his whims.

“Lan Zhan. HanGuang-Jun. Did you throw this at me?” Hetouches the blanket after a moment between them stretches and laughs when LanWangJi nods, then looks at the papers strewn all over the table.

“Any progress?”

Wei Ying swallows another gulp of his congee and shakeshis head, supporting his chin with his palm. “There must be something I’m missing.Will you look at it as well for me?” He takes the papers and pushes them allthe way across and leans back, waits for Lan WangJi to accept them, follows hisface as he meticulously reads every line, studies every annotation and scribble.

His forehead ribbon is as immaculate as ever and WeiYing really wants to play with it, tug at the ends and mess up the linecrossing Lan WangJi’s forehead, hold it until all of its length is as warm asthe parts warmed by Lan WangJi’s skin.

It reminds him of the time he had a paper body,blowing Lan WangJi a kiss and crooking his ribbon, annoying Lan WangJi’s patience,when all of this between them was still unsure and hidden away.

“Lan Zhan, remember when I – wait,” Wei Ying stops, straighteningup, and Lan WangJi’s eyes flicker towards him, caught by the movement, sudden,a spring unleashed. “All this time, I’ve been trying to dispel the ward fromthe inside. But maybe it can only be reversed from the outside.” He taps his chin with a finger, already biting into histhumb. “I mean, this kind of thing doesn’t usually happen and therefore doesn’tneed to be specified, but I didspecify the outside protection so maybe I’ve only made it reversible from theoutside, as well.”

Lan WangJi opens his palm and waits for the freshlymade talisman to flutter his way, catching it smoothly between his fingers. “I’llcast it,” he nods.

“Mn, yeah. Thank you, Lan Zhan.” Wei Ying smiles andthe hope swells in him like a tidal wave, like the breath you take in afterbeing submerged for minutes on end. The sound he lets out when the paper burnsout and Lan WangJi is still unable to touch him is almost pained, like all theweight of the failure dragged his heart down to his feet.

He lets out a frustrated growl instead and his headthuds against the table, nearly knocking his finished bowl of congee over.

Lan WangJi sighs too, quietly, almost like he forgotto breathe for a moment as well and just remembered, willed his lungs to let go.

“Are there more?”

Wei Ying looks up. “More reverse spells?”

“Mn.”

“I’ve written down a few.”

“I will try them as well.” Lan WangJi gathers up WeiYing’s notes again, copies down all of the talismans, no matter how minisculethe correction and uses them one by one, always pausing to test if it worked,relentlessly, without a second of complaint or anger, without losing hope.

How he’s so composed, so seemingly calm ruffles WeiYing’s feathers – he wants to ruffle Lan Zhan’s instead, but not like this, not in ways that hurt underneath: hewants to watch him flick all of them back into its place, not render him unableto fly.

Yet there’s this undeniable, irrational annoyance whenthe last talisman is gone and instead of offering alternatives, Lan WangJi proposesWei Ying should take a bath, Wei Ying’s inner robes the ones that he’s arrivedin yesterday, his hair tangled up around his ribbon in stubborn knots.

“A bath won’t solve anything,” he protests but LanWangJi’s already gotten up, leaving to fetch their bathtub and hot water,silently preparing it like he always does, like nothing’s different, payinglittle attention to Wei Ying’s protests beyond a glance.

Wei Ying keep sitting down at the table, as aprinciple, because there are more pressing matters than a dirty robe, like whyhe’s still not figured this out and why his notes aren’t clear to his own mind, why Lan Zhan’s fine with all of this, why is he notvisibly upset, why isn’t he angry with him for causing this mess.

Why, instead, he stands as close (far, far) as he can, beckoning him into the water.“Wei Ying,” he says and just stands there and watches him like Wei Ying’s the unreasonable one, theneedlessly annoyed child.

“Fine,” WeiYing huffs, giving in after a two minute stare down, jerkily taking off hisclothes right there at the table, notstomping across the room naked, plopping into the water with an unnecessarysplash.

The water presses into all of his tensed up musclesand it does clear his head as hedunks it under, refreshes parts of him he didn’t realize were this tired as hescrubs the remnants of travel and uncomfortable sleep off, decidedly notlooking Lan WangJi’s way.

He’s slowly getting unwound by the soft suds slippingoff his shoulder, the weight of his body that just always lifts when he’s inthe water, when he’s brought back to being small and never cold anymore: he canalmost feel Shijie’s careful fingers combing through his hair.

(He can almost feel Lan Zhan’s, even gentler,somehow.)

Wei Ying sighs.

He’s not sulking and he’s not feeling guilty for being petulant, for making things harder forthe one person who’s chosen every hardship just to be by his side, just toprotect what he’s already lost once before.

When he looks up, embarrassed at his own meltdown, LanWangJi is at his work table, two stacks of papers neatly pressed against eachother, one pile decidedly bigger than the second and Wei Ying’s hit with hownormal, how routine this feels: Lan Zhan grading reports as Wei Ying bathes,Wei Ying reaching over and helping when his cheeks are already pink and hisskin all scrubbed, commenting on the wonky calligraphy of one student, praisingthe neatness and detailed work of another’s next.

It’s still a long way until evening but Wei Yingshifts in the tub until he’s at the other side, wet fingers tapping at the edgeof the desk. “Let me help, Lan Zhan,” he offers, drying his hands and eventhough there’s the everlasting unnatural gap between them, it calms his heart,this quiet time of togetherness, this little piece of normalcy.

His irritation dissipates fully, sinking to the bottomof the bathwater, forsaken and ashamed.

—

Lan WangJi collects Wei Ying’s discarded clothes to bewashed, pausing at the threshold, holding the inner robe close, enclosed withinhis arms, wrinkled and worn. He lifts the cloth to his lips, inhales shakilyagainst the tightness of his pulse, the emotions knotting up his heart.

He stalls, allows himself this minute of longing, thisminute outburst of missing a person who’s standing right in front of you, sofamiliar yet strange, unreachable.

(He makes sure that Wei Ying doesn’t – that no one –sees.)

—

Another two nights pass and Wei Ying decides to stophiding in the Jingshi and doesn’t cancelhis late afternoon class like they’ve planned: he’s bored out of his mind.

(And he’s not getting any new ideas either, anyway.)

Lan WangJiwanted for them to head to the Library Pavilion right after breakfast buttruthfully, Wei Ying is going stir crazy, stuck at the table and riflingthrough notes close to two days in a row now. He needs some movement and aslovely as watching Lan WangJi is, he needs a change of scenery, too – and eventhough it’s not night, he can still teach the juniors a thing or two,especially when the sun beckons so sweetly and the news of a lone ghoul findingits way into a pond halfway to Caiyi Town has reached Gusu just days before.

(It reminds him of Yunmeng summer days, sticky and hot,with a bundle of juniors at his heels and Jiang Cheng scowling right next tohis side.)

It barely stings anymore, memories like this, so helets them pass, focuses on the uniform footsteps that follow in his wake.

“Who can tell me where we’re headed?”he turns aroundas he asks, pausing when the juniors seem to be hesitating on the cuff of the crossroad,not one disciple trying to answer his question or meeting his eyes.

He frowns. “What’s wrong with you all? Did someonespill chili powder into your breakfast?” he asks again, teasing, but his eyesnarrow when even A-Yuan shifts nervously. “Come on, spit it out. What’s thematter?” He tries for a gentler tone and unsurprisingly, it’s JingYi that stepsforward, a stubborn air to his stride.

“Why wasn’t HanGuang-Jun seeing us off today?” heaccuses, quickly, and some of the juniors nod their head along.

Wei Ying gapes.

“Huh?”

“HanGuang-Jun wasn’t –”

“I heard you, I heard you!” he interrupts, indisbelief.

No one makes a single move for what feels like anhour, no one starts laughing telling him he’s fallen for this elaborate prank,this gaggle of teens frowning upon him for not letting his husband see him off.

Okay. What’s trulygoing on?

“HanGuang-Jun hasbetter things to do than standing around watching people leave,” Wei Yingcounters, arms crossed in front of his chest. He’s never been faced with thejuniors’ disapproval like this and he’s as taken aback as he’s slightlyannoyed.

(Isn’t there a rule that says not to question yourelders about their love life or something?)

“But he always sees us off when we leave with SeniorWei,” a disciple interjects, quietly piping up from among the crowd. Thedisciples around him nod, gravely, as if they’re judges of a severe crime,ready to profess him guilty as charged.

(Wei Ying feels like he’s living through a rathersurreal dream.)

“Senior Wei, did you tell HanGuang-Jun we were leavingCloud Recesses?” Shizui asks then, kindly, with the smallest hint of hesitationthat tells Wei Ying he’s worried about something, troubled by the possibleanswer Wei Ying will give.

It softens Wei Ying’s temper, just a little bit.

“Aren’t you guys being a little too much? HanGuang-Junknows perfectly well I am teaching a class.” He doesn’t quite know Wei Ying has left Gusu, per se, true, but they’re goingbarely halfway to Caiyi Town. It doesn’t even count as a field trip.

“HanGuang-Jun always tells Senior Wei goodbye, nomatter how far we go!”

“That’s right!”

“Yeah!”

The disciples chime in and for once, Wei Ying almostregrets how openly him and Lan Zhan operate. Now even the kids think they areprivy to the details of their relationship, is it?

“We believe you didn’t tell him we were leaving CloudRecesses at all! Because the ward is still there and HanGuang-Jun wouldn’t behappy with you leaving in such a condition!” JingYi finishes for everyone andWei Ying has a moment of thorough disbelief at how transparent both his and LanZhan’s motives seem to be.

(And here he used to believe his husband was an enigmato anyone but Zewu-Jun.)

“You kids –”

“HanGuang-Jun has been really worried for Senior Wei!”

“Maybe we should head back?”

“Yeah!”

Wei Ying subtly pinches himself, making sure he trulyis not, in fact, stuck in a fever dream.

“Am I still with the obedient, quiet, good Landisciples? Or have they all been possessed?”He shakes his head, uncrossing hisarms to put them on his hips, authoritatively (he hopes).

“Now, everybody, listen up. Of course I told everyonewho needed to know where we are going. While I am objectively the safest I canbe in this state, it is you juniors we are worried about. So of course there’ssomeone who knows where we are. And I have signal flares with me in case we runinto more trouble than we can handle.” Not that it’s likely, if there truly isonly one or a couple of water ghouls – they should be perfectly capable oftaking care of a situation like that, even withouta supervising elder.

There’s a hum that sweeps through the crowd  at that and with distinct relief upon nofurther protests being received, Wei Ying deems the problem settled, returningto his first, original question, repeating it just a tad louder to overpowerthe remaining echoes of suspicion and his own rattling surprise:

“Now, does really noone know where we’re headed?”

—

Naturally, Wei Ying cannot keep the children’soutburst to himself.

He’s sprawled on the ground with a cup full of wine andwith his stomach all warmed up by dinner, just spicy enough to redden hischeeks a little, just red enough to quicken his pulse (or is that all Lan Zhan,watching him so intently?)

So, naturally,Wei Ying complains, shaking his head after taking a generous, alcoholic sip. “Canyou believe the children accused me of not telling you I was leaving with themtoday? They were saying I didn’t let you tell me goodbye!”

“You didn’t,” Lan WangJi retorts, not disapprovingly,but his lips might be just a littlebit tighter, pursed the tiniest amount.

(Wei Ying wishes he could kiss them, kiss all of itoff.

Alas -)

“I told your Uncle,” he defends himself, belatedly andLan WangJi pauses as he refills his own cup of tea, herbal and scented aftermedicine, the fragrance bittersweet.

Wei Ying quickly raises his own cup, chasing the heavyscent from his throat. “And we didn’t go far! Not even as far as Caiyi Town,”he adds.

Lan WangJi takes his time with his answer, but after amoment he sighs, voice soft. “I still wish to tell you goodbye, no matter whereyou go or how long you will be gone for.” He’s talking carefully, as if he’steaching this, as if he’s intent on not being misunderstood.

It’s endearing as hell.

“That’s what the juniors said too,” Wei Ying responds,grumbling, despite the pounding of his heart.

How can any man resist a confession this sincere?

“And, well – I’m back now. Will you tell me welcomeback?” He grins. He means it as a tease, a way to change the subject of beingguilty of exactly of what he wasaccused of: but Lan Zhan’s just too good of a person, too good of a man to notdo it anyway.

“Mn. Welcome back, Wei Ying.”

God. Wei Ying’s insides hurt with how much he wants to touch him, devour him on the spot.He hurts with how much he just wants and wantsand how every time he’s being kept apart, it’s by his own doing, his ownfaults, his own actions, keeping him stranded in empty fields, in places thateat him alive.

“Lan Zhan! Iwas clearly teasing you!” he yelps and hides his flushed face behind the cup ofwine he’s emptied two times over by now; peeks over the edge.

Lan Zhan’s never letting him go.

“Mn. But greetings are polite. Wei Ying should saygoodbye properly next time, as well,” Lan WangJi says, tucking in what’s trulybothered him in such an efficient way Wei Ying just can’t help but feeladmonished and endeared – again – at the same time.

“Your notes say so, as well,” Lan WangJi adds and it’sa strange enough remark to tilt the world right into its axis again, away fromLan WangJi and words that Wei Ying can’t possibly fit all in, can’t keep all ofthem without an overflow.

(Lan WangJi is always so helpful, he truly is.)

“My notes?” Wei Ying shuffles through the – lessmessy now that Lan WangJi’s organized them – papers on the table, trying tofind what Lan WangJi means. Has he mentioned anything like that on them?

“Mn. Here. ‘Don’t forget to say goodbye.’” Lan WangJi’sfinger points to a corner of Wei Ying’s final page, underneath the finishedlayout of the ward.

Wei Ying’s heart stutters.

“… Lan… Zhan. Lan Zhan! ”He laughs, and stumbles,hastily getting up with a sudden buoyancy of hope, of a memory gasping for air.

“Of course it’s this simple!” He laughs again and his reliefcould span the universe, it’s so vast and deep. He claps and perfectlypronouncing, says: “Goodbye.” and even though he doesn’t feel any difference, inhis gut he knows: it worked. He knows because he’s remembered, he’s finally remembered and he curses his badmemory, curses working late into the night, half delirious and halfway todrunk, because it has finally bit him in the ass.

God, he really should listen to Lan Zhan more.

With a leap that might have sent all his notes flying,Wei Ying jumps into Lan WangJi’s arms, somehow already open and prepared tocatch him as he crashes into Lan WangJi’s lap heavily, kissing every inch ofLan WangJi’s cheeks and nose and temples, pecking his lips and holding onto him,desperately, holding onto the one anchor he has in this world.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry,” he repeats after eachkiss, chanting the words into Lan WangJi’s skin and he knows, he knows there’s no I’m sorry’s and no thank you’s between them but he’s finewith breaking the rules; he’s kissing a thankyou right into Lan Zhan’s mouth.

Lan WangJi’s fingers tremble minutely against hisback, his heart is loud under Wei Ying’s palm and Wei Ying loves him too muchto just not kiss him some more, to press himself into every little space leftbetween them, no matter how small.

Of course he’duse something so simple to break the ward. Something anyone can do. It is a talisman meant for ordinary people in thefirst place, not for cultivators: the person can best decide themself whenthey’re safe. When they do, the talisman vanishes, without any other wards,without any spiritual energy necessary. Ofcourse he’d pick something he has felt so smart about only to forget aboutit right after.

Of course.

Lan WangJi’s palm slips under his outer robe, his lipsmessing all of Wei Ying’s thoughts up – they fall apart when Lan WangJi’sfingers cross his skin and push his hips forward, keeping Wei Ying incredibly –impossibly – close.

There’s a laughhe presses into Lan WangJi’s cheek, right next to his temple, there’s anotherone trapped in the crook of Lan WangJi’s neck, airy and soft.

I have missedyou, Lan WangJi says, in a crushingly gentle hold,bruising but tender; in a kiss tracing Wei Ying’s hair, his neck, the curl ofhis shoulder.

Wei Ying’s eyes sting.

He thinks he might never let Lan Zhan go.

(He thinks Lan Zhan wouldn’t mind it either, at all.)

“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan.”His fingers cup Lan WangJi’s face and he can’t help himself but push againstLan WangJi’s cheeks, pressing his fingers against Lan WangJi’s perfectlyimpeccable features. “Tell me, Lan Zhan: would you have stayed even if I’venever remembered how to get rid of this? Would you have gotten sick of mehaving our bed all to myself? Would you have finally gotten angry at me forruining something good? Would you have told me to leave?Would you have saidgoodbye and found someone else to –”

“Wei Ying,” Lan WangJi interrupts him; face still alittle smushed, held fully between Wei Ying’s palms, a frown hidden deep in hisvoice. “Stop talking nonsense,” he tells him, seriously, sincere.

There are tears falling off the precipice of WeiYing’s jaw, dropping onto his arms like heated wax, a melting sob curling up inhis throat. Lan WangJi stays still under his fingertips but his thumb brushes atear away from Wei Ying’s cheek, rests underneath, waits for more sadness todispel.

“I want you, wherever you are,” he says, simply and WeiYing doesn’t know why he was crying in the first place, why he continues tofeel tears slip past his cheeks but soon after, Lan WangJi’s mouth replaces histhumb, replaces the air on Wei Ying’s own lips and they don’t quite tumble intobed: they don’t really make it that far.

For once, Wei Ying doesn’t complain about it, at all.

[curlytemple]

alrighty @scottspack here i am to show my ass 

top 10 ships tag! these aren’t “in order” but #1 is #1 

1. cory and topanga! (boy meets world) my very first thought when given this prompt, theyre the blueprint! they are just BABIEs when they meet and they already Know each other. i will not pretend that topanga didnt shape me into the kind of girl who wouldnt change one thing about herself for a boy, keep your legs hairy and your convictions strong! the way they grow together is enough to make me hate god for not giving ME a cory matthews. high school ski trip infidelity aside, theyre the first couple that made me think i could find a man. i was wrong but its nice to think about. 

2. kim possible and ron stoppable... the way the entire series is about kim being a wildly competent type A cheerleader AND teenage vigilante super spy and ron is her chilled out lame best friend who is Always there to help her save the day... please take a moment to listen to the jesse mccartney song why don’t you kiss her? that plays during the romantic climax of the kim possible movie, perfectly capturing the intense fear that comes with thinking about maybe finally kissing your best friend from preschool at your junior prom. 

3. tami and coach eric taylor (friday night lights) ...come on, y’all!!!! genuinely the most real relationship i have ever seen on screen. i don’t even know what to say other than that they are REAL. coach and tami are such a good couple that it doesn’t make any sense to me that their kid would have such a massive stick up her ass. i even tried an ‘empathize with julie’ rewatch, and while a lot of her teen angst is understandable and even relatable, she still seems so disconnected from her parents/dillon at the end of the show in a very unsatisfying way! coach and tami are the heart of fnl. and tim riggins.

4. belly conklin and conrad fisher (the summer i turned pretty trilogy by jenny han) bro.... when your mother’s dying wish is for you to care for your little brother, so when he has a little crush on the girl you are In Love With you bury your feelings and go to college far away because nothing is more important than their happiness, and they could be happy together! and years go by and theyre going to get married and youre set on being Happy For Them until you find out how much your brother has actually done to break her heart and her trust and then the thought of her settling for him is even more devastating than your true desire for her to settle for you.... WHEW! when you’ve been busy coming of age and trying to make it work with your best friend that isnt really right for you and then you find out his brother who you’ve been in love with your whole life turned into a distant asshole because the most important person in yalls lives taught him to be selfless and he over-corrected in his grief... BOY!! this one makes me feel like my heart is in my stomach.

5. SENSE8! can i just say all of it? everything and everyone? if you are bisexual and havent watched sense8 yet, this one is for us, baby! the ship is an interconnected web of LOVE AND TRUST. the pairings are endless. if i HAD to choose my fav, wolfgang and kala (and rajan <3) and i cant explain why i would pick them over anyone else, thats just what my pussy told me. but frankly i shouldnt have to choose, THEY ALL SHARE ONE CONSCIOUSNESS! ONE LOVE! 

6. david and patrick (schitt’s creek) you know the way we all feel like we aren’t enough and we’re Way Too Much.. dan levy really said hey guys? no offense but i think we might be capable of loving and even maybe Being Loved. the way patrick is all in on david rose from the moment he meets him, before he can even consider what that means about himself... the way they push each other out of their comfort zones and only get more comfortable with themselves and each other..  the way david’s abstract monochrome wardrobe fills with HEARTS AND RAINBOWS !!!!!! again, where’s my man? ANYWAYS, 

7. todd and rory (straight up) anna said this post is for romantic ships only and so I CAN AND WILL INCLUDE THEM. i don’t want to give any spoilers because i dont think tumblr has seen this yet, but when i say this is THE romcom of the year, perhaps of my life, trust!! todd is a gay man with a sex aversion who decides to try to date women and rory is the brilliant woman he actually falls in love with. sometimes soulmates dont fuck!!! maybe there are no rules to a good relationship besides mutual respect, understanding, and the undeniable desire to Be Together. i rest my case! 

8. drew barrymore and adam sandler  is this valid? again i dont know or care. i grew up on adam sandler movies and drew barrymore makes him better every time. they’ve only done 3 movies together, one of which i have not and will not see (2014 is just too cursed to return to) but even tho these two have never been a couple in real life their chemistry is so palpable that they consider each other the person they will grow old with on screen. if that’s not hollywood romance, i dont know what is! sorry to timothy olyphant but even drew says adam is The One. 

9. stef and lena adams-foster (the fosters) MOM AND MOMMA! listen, abc family shows are insane, but stef and lena make the drama worthwhile. their house full of teens is not perfect or easy, but never have i ever seen lesbian moms at the center of any media, let alone ones who thrive like they do when they communicate, support each other, and lead with love. this is a couple who chooses each other and their babies over and over again. its about putting in the work, having the tough conversations, and making the hard decisions because you care!!!!! 

10.  I DONT KNOW HOW TO END THIS, I LOVE LOVE! michael and alex! marshall and lily! steve and nancy AND jonathan! lizzie mcguire and gordo! rachel and griffin mcelroy! nick and jess! schmidt and cece! fleabag and the priest! amy pond and rory! river song and the doctor! ROSE and the doctor! MY MOM AND DAD!!!! mickey and ian! han and leia! johnny and gheorghe! princess bubblegum and marceline the vampire queen! jackie and kelso! jackie and HYDE! donna and eric! kitty and red! richie and eddie! jake and amy! brittany and santana! tim and tyra! JACK AND ENNIS! dj and steve! uncle jesse and aunt becky! aziraphale and crowley! bob and linda belcher! LARRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

[im-the-king-of-the-ocean]

Punch in the gut prompts, Whiterose 17 “I want you to say anything! Scream! Yell at me! Just something to show you fucking care.”

So I sort of messed up in that I didn’t use the dialogue line exactly.  I intended to, had it in, but then I went back and wrote a beginning to build up things a little more and the tone shifted a bit.  Parts of it are still sort of there, just altered.

(tho it’s still hurt/comfort feat. Whiterose)

.

Together, We Blossom

The fire flickers low.  Weiss fidgets.  She wants to put another log on.  To make things warmer, but the tenseness in the air keeps her in her seat.  She’s not certain she wants to be the first to move.  To draw attention to herself.

“I…”  Ruby speaks.  All eyes gathered turn to her.

Weiss watches Ruby’s face scrunch up with emotion.  She doesn’t have a chance to see which one.  A flurry of rose petals bursts from where Ruby sits.  It flies out of the room.  Ruby is gone.

“I got this.”  Weiss stands.  She hadn’t been adding too much to the conversation anyway.  She can’t bear the thought of leaving Ruby be when she’s hurting.  She won’t.

When Weiss walks by her, Yang grabs her wrist.  They make eye contact.  Their conversation is brief and entirely done through silent facial expressions.  Weiss nods.  Yang releases her and sits back.  Unbeknownst to the others, a promise has passed between them.

Weiss leaves the room.  The hallways of the Atlas house General Ironwood gifted them are silent and dark.  The night sky through the windows provides little in terms of light.

The echo of her own footsteps unnerve Weiss.  The emptiness here reminds her so much of the Schnee family manor.  It’s hard not to imagine that she’s back there.  Weiss never wanted to return to Atlas.  She sighs.  When she gets to Ruby’s closed door, Weiss buries the feeling.  She knocks.

No response.

Weiss knocks again, a little more firmly.  She tries to slow her breathing.  If Ruby isn’t here…

Again, no vocal response, but Weiss hears something shift inside the room and a telltale ‘owwie’.  She takes hold of the doorknob, twists, and opens the door.

Ruby’s room somehow manages to be darker than the hallway.  The only light, the gleam from the distant moon outside the window.  It takes Weiss’s eyes a moment to adjust, but, when they do, she notices a person-sized lump on the bed.

“What do you want, Weiss?”  Ruby’s voice is uncharacteristically toneless.

Weiss’s resolve to stay calm and collected almost dissipates.  “I wanted to see if you were alright.  You sort of ran out.  I know this is hard and—”

“I’m okay.  Thanks for checking on me.  You can go now.”

“Ruby.”  Weiss steps into the room.

“I said I’m fine, Weiss.”

“Look, it’s okay if you’re not.”  Weiss advances another step.  “This is hard on everyone.  We all need support every once in a while.”

“I said GO AWAY!”  Ruby slams her fists into the bed.  The movement causes her to jerk forward, so her face is in the light from the hallway.  She recoils back, but not before Weiss sees the trails her tears left.

Weiss purses her lips.  “I’m not going to do that.  At least, not before you tell me what I can do to help.”

No response.  Weiss waits.

“I—I want you to say…” Ruby trails off.  “I don’t know.”  The second statement is barely more than a whisper.  Her voice abruptly rises,  “Scream!  Yell at me!”

Weiss sees Ruby’s hands clench back into fists.  Her nails digging into the palms of her hands.  Weiss winces.  That looks like it hurts.  It is wrong.  So wrong.  She wants to run to Ruby, to stop her.  But she doesn’t want to push Ruby further away.  She’s never seen her hurting.  Not like this.  Not this badly.

Weiss can’t, she can’t lose Ruby.  It’s selfish.  It’s juvenile.  But, she can’t.  Not after everything.  Not while knowing they have so far left to go.  Not like this.

Weiss doesn’t truly know where she stands in the fight against Salem.  She’s not Blake, with her convictions to change the world for the better.  Or Yang, with her dedication to protect her family.  She’s here because, well, because seeing Yang in Raven Branwen’s camp had been a huge relief.

Without Winter in Mistral, Weiss had been uncertain, scared.  She knew she couldn’t stay and let the bandits send her back to Father.  Yet, she didn’t know where she would go next either.  Yang had given her a sense of direction, of purpose.  Yang was heading to Ruby, so Weiss would too.  And honestly?  There was no better place for her to be.

Learning everything, though, about the truth of the world, made Weiss feel small, insignificant.  Grimm aren’t just mindless beasts of destruction.  They have a mistress, and a true purpose.  There is a being who hates humanity so much that she won’t rest until she sees them wiped from the face of the planet.  Salem will destroy anything and everyone, regardless of whether or not they stand in her way.

In the face of all that, Weiss can’t lose Ruby.  Not when Ruby makes her feel less alone.  Less isolated.  Less cold.  Less like an ice queen.

The nickname is, and always has been, a joke, sure.  But there’s always been some truth to it.  Before Beacon, Weiss pushed the world away.  She’d shut everything out.  Nothing wanted her.  Not as she truly was.  Only what they wanted her as, which was so far from the truth that the facade could have been another person entirely.  Weiss had built her walls to protect herself.  To be herself.

Until Ruby.  Ruby with her warmth, her smiles, her laughs and her jokes.  Ruby who could melt the icy exterior Weiss armored herself in, but in such a gentle way that it never felt like her safeguards were being destroyed.  Ruby who she missed, and longed for dearly, every day back before they reunited.

Salem would destroy Ruby, just because of the eye color Ruby happened to be born with.

More than anything else, that’s what keeps Weiss up at night.

“I care so much.”  Ruby’s voice is quiet.  Much quieter than it usually is.  Somehow that’s worse.  “But, don’t you see, Weiss?  That’s the problem!”  She hiccups.  Weiss can’t see her new tears, but she can hear the sobs Ruby fails to muffle.  “That’s why I have to go!  To keep you safe! I can’t let you—I can’t let anyone else—”  The cry escapes.  Ruby gives up trying to hide it.  Tears stream.  Their trails glitter in the moonlight.  “Don’t you get it, Weiss?!  They’ll always hunt me!  Because of my eyes!  Of what I can do!”  She wails.  “And they don’t care who they hurt to get to me.”  She pulls her blanket up over her head and cocoons herself.

Weiss sits down next to Ruby.  She inhales.  Exhales.  Pulls the blanket down off her partner’s head.  With her thumb, Weiss wipes the tears away from Ruby’s eyes.  She pulls her sleeve over her hand and uses it to dry Ruby’s face.

“I know.  We all know.  And none of us are going anywhere.  That’s our choice to make.”

“But, I—”

“Ruby, do you know what would break my heart?”  Weiss interrupts.  “If you were attacked and I, or Yang or Blake, weren’t there.  We’re a team.  That means we stick together.”

A spark of Ruby’s normal self returns.  She lets out the quietest of laughs.  “Isn’t that what the team leader is supposed to say?”

“Well.  I think even our fearless leader needs reminding every now and then.”

Weiss wraps her arms around Ruby, who doesn’t hesitate to snuggle into her embrace.  She presses her lips to the top of Ruby’s head.  A soft kiss.  A reminder of love freely given.  Weiss listens to Ruby’s breathing ease.  She places a hand on Ruby’s back as it rises and falls.  A reassurance to herself.  Ruby is still here.  Still breathing.  She hasn’t lost her.  She won’t loose her.

“Would you like me to stay?”  Weiss whispers.  She feels Ruby nod against her in reply.

Weiss settles against the pillows.  Ruby reaches for one of Weiss’s hands, which she intertwines with her own.  With her free hand, Weiss strokes Ruby’s hair until she eventually drifts off to sleep.

[bthump]

watching jojo's bizarre adventure anime adaptation and seeing how much the anime team fixed araki (the mangaka)'s bad writing makes me rlly wish that if berserk gets a proper anime adaptation whoever does it will do the same with miura's writing (and some of his art too tbh). like for example for all their faults the berserk movies did improve casca's character. what are your wants for a potential full berserk anime adaptation? (also let's hope that this is the year we finally get one 🤞)

I never finished JJBA or watched the anime so idk, but I’m curious how much they changed. Like were there big changes to the plot, or was it mostly just little minor changes to smooth over some flaws?

ty for asking, and I apologize in advance for how long this got lol.

tbh I think my ideal, if not realistic, Berserk adaptation is one that just goes ‘fuck it’ and throws out most of the story lol. Starts with Black Swordsman, ends with Femto lowering his hand and letting Guts escape - well more specifically, on this panel:

Like that is a perfect final shot imho.

(Also I might mirror it with the opening shot. Like I wouldn’t open on Guts fucking an apostle lmao, I don’t actually dislike that opening but it doesn’t fit this theoretical adaption. So how about we open on a long shot of Black Swordsman Guts surrounded by the ghosts he’s fighting, that mimics this?)

Ooh I might also… I might stick the Lost Children arc in between Snake Man and Count Slug. Ugggh there are some logistical issues to untangle there, but I really, really want Jill/Rosine Guts/Griffith parallels, and I want ghosts taunting Guts about becoming a monster like his friend. Subtlety is for cowards. Oh except we wouldn’t’ve seen Femto yet so that wouldn’t work. Well, “like him” then instead of “like your friend.” There now it’s foreshadowing 2 ways.

the climax of the story is the moment of sacrifice because there’s no Eclipse rape, Casca dies shortly after Judeau, and Guts’ horror at being sacrificed by Griffith is the emotional low point. Potentially no gtsca either if I can figure out a way to incorporate Guts’ stupid dream speech somewhere else. Maybe it can be a flashback during the Wyald fight, which I’d keep incidentally, sans attempted rape, w/ Guts talking to Erica. Actually yeah that would be perfect and immediately tie Guts’ “dream” of fighting stronger and stronger enemies with fighting monsters lol, meaning I could bypass Guts’ post Eclipse war declaration that draws that comparison more explicitly.

Boom, Berserk is now a nice little self-contained tragic story about two dudes each becoming solitary monsters because they abandoned each other for abstract dreams, and threw aside the potential for true emotional healing (relationships) for shallow coping mechanisms (swords/dreams). Uhhh, also Puck is cut. Sorry Puck, ilu but you’re a ray of hope that ruins the vibe here.

And finally since this is my ideal adaptation, the subtext between Guts and Griffith is text. They don’t actually fuck or kiss, because that would avert the Eclipse, but… hm how do you make it clear that they want to fuck but are too repressed to do it and that’s what ruins everything? Okay well Griffith’s torture chamber monologue includes “love” a la the anime dub, and maybe “desire” or “need” to completely remove that ambiguity desperately maintained in the minds of straight people. And Guts… I don’t know that I can go textual lol. The only point in the story he can possibly recognize his own feelings is chapter 71.

Ooh I got it. Just include “at that time he shone before me as something beautiful, noble, and larger than life” after the Count’s backstory lmao. Do you really need more? Well, maybe “he shone before me as something larger than life - noble, and… beautiful.” Or just cut to the chase completely: “At that time, he shone before me as something beautiful, noble, and larger-than-life. I loved him.”

OKAY all that said I feel like this wasn’t really what you’re asking lol since you mentioned a complete adaption. So okay assuming there are no huge major changes to the content or structure of the story, here’s a (stupidly long, like only read this if you for some reason enjoy seeing me ramble for days about minute details lmao) list of some more minor things I’d want to change:

I’d start with the Black Swordsman arc and continue as the manga goes. Yes, in this one Guts still fucks an apostle. This is right before the credits, and it’s depicted as badass and cool. In fact, I might actually split the scene with the credits - start the opening sequence right after Guts blows her up, and resume on this shot with more of a sombre tone:

Like okay that would be pretty cheesy lol, but this is the Black Swordsman arc. It’s supposed to be a little campy, and really unsubtle, and this seems like a fun way of highlighting this little tonal shift.

Relatedly, I would not acknowledge the fact that most people watching already know where it’s going. I would maintain the integrity of the first arc in starting off with Guts as an apparent cool badass and then tearing that down, as well as keeping Griffith’s identity and Guts’ motivation a mystery in theory, and making the Count’s backstory the climax of this arc in a revelatory sense, rather than in an action sense.

To get more general, no fanservice for straight dudes. no one’s tits are randomly out, and when they are they’re drawn realistically and subject to the laws of gravity. casca’s clothes don’t get torn all the time, rosine’s got full moth fuzz coverage, farnese is wearing a shirt when guts takes her hostage and if we need self-flagellation (and tbh I wouldn’t necessarily cut it) it can be in a flashback, etc. Oh except Slan I guess. Her whole character is fanservice so w/e I’ll allow it.

not every woman is in love with and solely motivated by a dude. skip the queen’s completely unnecessary reveal that she was in love with julius, skip casca’s “I lived my life with the intent of sacrificing myself on my unrequited feelings for griffith” bullshit, skip sonia’s crush on neogriffith, skip tf out of schierke’s crush on guts, skip the random period of incest-y bdsm-y vibes in Farnese and Serpico’s backstory that adds nothing lol, skip the suggestions that Farnese is jealous of Casca’s history with Guts, etc

also most sexual assault scenes are cut. Casca is running for her life during the 100 man fight, not from attempted rapists. Wyald does not assault Casca, Farnese is not almost raped by a fucking horse, we chill out a bit on the sexual torture in every bg scene during the conviction arc jfc, Casca’s multiple assaults during that arc are cut, troll rape is cut, you get the point.

I’ll keep Adon’s shitty threats tho bc i feel like some violent misogyny is necessary if i’m not changing everything, but I’d completely lose the comic relief vibe he gets and make Casca’s fight with him properly epic and satisfying. The movie did this a bit better imo, but I’d really remove Adon’s whole boastful loser schtick. That might disappoint some fans, but idc Casca deserves to kill someone who is actually kind of a badass.

There’s a lot of bullshit around gtsca that I’m torn between wanting to cut, and instead wanting to just depict very negatively. Like would it be better if instead of Casca shyly asking Guts how she looks in a dress she just complained about the dress being uncomfortable, ie we completely cut that burgeoning “soft side” bs?

Or would it be better if she still asked him how she looks, then we call back to that moment when she gets awkward about her scars before sex, we keep Judeau musing on how she’s showing a soft side, we call back to that when he tells Guts to save her from leadership, we tie it all together when Guts asks Casca to leave with him, and bring it home by making it abundantly clear that Casca moving from being Griffith’s sword to Guts’ sword is not a positive change.

Like highlight everything negative about it - Guts being a huge dick, the ominous undertone when he invites her along (like cue the creepy cello music when they kiss right before we shift to monsters and behelits lol), all the parallels between him and Griffith wrt their dreams, Guts telling Casca to fuck off while he fights Wyald, maybe even add a moment where Casca actually reflects on how she’s left out of all the dream/equals bullshit and what that says about their priorities and how they see her. Might be a nice lead up to her telling Guts to leave to pursue his dream and be Griffith’s equal.

also maybe show that judeau is wrong about casca being better off away from the hawks? ugh there’s so much that would have to be reworked with her narrative. like if she still has to attempt suicide, again can we ditch the lead up about how it’s because she has an unrequited crush on griffith and just keep it about the fact that she hasn’t slept in a week and she’s on the run and her hawks keep dying and griffith is being tortured and she just stabbed guts and she’s had a very difficult year?

and like, maybe she leapt to accept Guts’ ‘come with me’ offer because she’s exhausted and emotionally overwhelmed, but are you kidding me? While Guts gets an entire narrative arc about abandoning his found family, Casca doesn’t even think about it for a moment before agreeing to ditch them? Can we maybe have some indication about how she feels about the Hawks as a family, maybe some reflection about why she would choose to leave, maybe some second thoughts about it after the Wyald fight when it becomes abundantly clear what her role would be while Guts pursues his dream, like god she’s such a pawn of the narrative, I hate it. Give her some real reasons for doing stuff!

ANYWAY moving on

like the movie, I’d give charlotte more agency in the sex scene w/ griffith, I liked her asking him to stay and moving his hand to her tit herself. I probably would not actually make griffith so out of it though - i enjoyed that in the movie but I don’t necessarily consider it in-character. The way he went from literally crying in the rain to smiling and making charming jokes as soon as Charlotte opened the window in the manga honestly makes perfect sense to me lol. Just uh, make Charlotte into it from the start because there’s zero reason for her not to be other than bad misogynistic cliches?

Also I feel like there’s a balance to be struck between depicting het sex as dude sticks his dick in, woman somehow has a good time a la the manga vs making guts and griffith competent at foreplay and oral a la the movies lol. Like maybe depict the sex scenes as the bad sex they are but Charlotte still feels closer to Griffith afterwards despite not coming from a dude fucking her while thinking about another dude and like, just keep Casca telling Guts he was obviously a virgin afterwards lol.

I guess we’re stuck with the Eclipse rape, but it happens mostly off screen and in close, telling but non-explicit details, like yk, big clawed hand holding a wrist, Casca’s eyes squeezed shut, Femto’s hand on the small of her back (I’m thinking a reversed call back to the wagon scene w/ that to suggest Femto’s motivation being a show of power tbqh). Some would be from Casca’s pov, with maybe one brief moment from Guts’ pov as he loses an eye or something. Keep the movie’s visual reference to Griffith saving her. No pornographic angles. No apostle rape prelude to it. Casca doesn’t have an orgasm. Femto doesn’t stare at Guts. It’s not about Guts at all for either of them, it’s about Femto taking Griffith’s fucked up relationship to sex and expressing it monstrously, and it’s about Casca being betrayed and symbolically negating the agency she fought for since Griffith threw her a sword. Guts’ reaction is horror and fear, not manly heroic outrage. He might still rip off his arm to attack Femto, but that would be because that’s always his reaction to whatever scares him, not for Casca’s sake. Might have to contextualize that with flashbacks to his childhood, or at the very least strong visual parallels to both his childhood and the Zodd + Wyald fights.

I want to cut the fetus, replace it with like a cronenburg-y fucked up dog-like demon in the Black Swordsman arc - not as a literal version of the Beast of Darkness, but just as a metaphor for how Guts’ inner darkness is twisting him into a pathetic asshole lol. But tbh cutting the fetus is a logistical nightmare because Casca needs magic protection during the Conviction arc. So idk. But NGriff doesn’t need it, and his narrative would be more engaging without that scapegoat. Fuck emotional ambiguity, I just want to drop the news that NGriff has feelings, and then not change anything else about his narrative. The themes of isolation and loneliness threaded throughout would just shine through lol it would be great.

I would emphasize the shit out of the Beast of Darkness/Femto parallels. Yeah Guts would still assault Casca in my adaption too. If the Eclipse rape happens, that has to happen because the point is that Guts’ inner darkness is the same. But like, I’d cut the page where beast of darkness guts bites her head off while raping her. Also I’d keep the visual parallel to the Eclipse rape (the v similarly depicted kisses) and add another from Casca’s point of view, or have her flashback then instead of just staying in Guts’ head.

as for the fallout, I’d give Guts a proper scene where he sees himself as a monster, like damn he got more of a self-reflective and telling reaction that time he accidentally killed a random kid, we should get something when he sexually assaults Casca. but overall I’d focus way more on Casca being afraid of him now rather than his mopey guilt. I would also… I mean god this should be addressed in the fact that Guts fucking wears the Berserk armour all the time lol. Like one second he’s all, “omg Flora can put a magic seal on my brand that’ll depower my magical evil jiminy cricket wolf and hopefully prevent me from raping and murdering Casca, that’s great!” and the next second he’s all, “omg magic armour I can wear that will enable me to kill everything with the side effect of superpowering my inner evil wolf and turning on my companions? sign me the fuck up I’m sure nothing bad could possibly happen with that.”

Like what I’m saying is I’d either make Guts a lot more reluctant to use the armour and take Skull Knight’s warnings seriously and genuinely reflect on the fact that mysterious magical children have to prevent him from murdering his friends over and over again, or I’d draw attention to this idiocy and fully commit to Guts as a dumbass hypocrite blithely walking down the path to more tragedy of his own making. and probably the latter based on where the story is likely to be headed lol.

in the lost children arc, I’d give Rosine’s mother more of a role as a good parent who Rosine has a loving relationship with, who tried and failed to stop her father’s abuse or something, because honestly I love the Peekaf story and I find Rosine’s regret at the end as she tries to fly home v powerful, but I hate the idea that she regrets sacrificing her abusive father so maybe this way I can split the difference.

and Jill’s ending where she goes home to endure abuse would be depicted much more darkly.

like straight up I’d depict Jill flying with Rosine as a truly beautiful moment, I would show that Jill has the potential to fulfill Rosine in a way her neverland kidnapping bullshit can’t and that yes, if Jill stayed with Rosine everything might actually work out and with Jill’s influence the whole land of the elves thing could be reworked into less of a nightmare and more of a haven lol. And Guts would absolutely be depicted as fully monstrous in comparison, ruining both these kids’ lives. Like, no ambiguity, no suggestion that Jill learned an important lesson about living with abuse lmao, no implication that Rosine brought her tragic end on herself by not being a good enough child abuse victim, just Guts sowing tragedy wherever he goes.

I have no idea how to deal with the conviction arc in general lol, specifically the ultra cynical tone the actual narrative seems to take. Like, the Black Swordsman arc was idealistic compared to the Conviction arc, they clash badly imo. Extremely badly. Like it’s a giant mess. It’s like

Black Swordsman Guts: fuck everyone who dies because they weren’t strong enough to deal with my existence. *turns and wipes away a tear* *lets a zombie kid stab him* *evokes pity from puck*Conviction Guts: fuck everyone who dies because they weren’t strong enough to deal with my existence. *poses with his sword in one hand and the rescued love interest in the other* *the crowd cheers* *luca nods sagely*

yk it’s just… awkward. It’s hard to mitigate through like, film choices yk, because a lot of it is due to the circumstances. Guts telling Puck innocent people are just ants under his feet is much different than Guts refusing to let the big bad kill Casca by telling him that tens of thousands of people can and should die because they pray too much lmao, no matter what music plays in the background. Guts’ attitude is the same, the narrative’s attitude is contradictory.

Maybe I could make Guts less of a dick and cut a lot of those cynical moments? Not really call attention to the fact that Guts is effectively sacrificing tens of thousands of refugees for Casca, or more accurately, for his own desire to feel like a hero since he isn’t even the one who saves Casca, he got distracted trying to fight the fake Godhand.

Or lol maybe I’ll just have Isidro point that out in like, a smug way. Maybe I’ll have NeoGriffith personally thank him for his contribution to his resurrection. I mean I really want to call this questionable shit into question, yk? Not to declare Guts wrong for wanting to save Casca, but to declare his cavalier idgaf attitude a big problem that has consequences. Which would actually tie in nicely with emphasizing Guts’ dumbassery in brushing off Skull Knight’s warnings about the armour and insisting it’s nbd. lol I really hope this is what Miura’s going for, just more subtlely.

Actually I wonder if I could get away with cutting Isidro out entirely. Anyone could’ve saved Casca there.

Oh I’d cut the hell out of a lot of Guts’ fight scenes in the MF arc, and if I could possibly get away with it I’d cut out everything on the beach after Skull Knight’s ominous warning. Like this might end up being the Griffith show for a while because Guts’ half is a fucking slog. And of course I’d cut the entire boat trip. They get on a boat, they get off a boat, the end.

Okay I need to stop somewhere. I’m ignoring a lot of later stuff because it’s so dependent on where the story’s going now that Casca is awake etc. Like eg the Moonlight Boy. Can I cut him? Give him a more ominous tone? Emphasize the saccharine tone he evokes for the sake of pulling the rug out from under the audience later? Will I be forced to make huge changes anyway because I can’t stand where the story ended up going? Idk it depends.

If I could tho I’d definitely cut Magnifico, Isidro, Ivalera, mermaid… like Farnese, Serpico, and Schierke are the only characters on Guts’ side who contribute to the story in a meaningful way. And without Isidro Puck could again too.

Oooh yk one thing that might be nice would be framing Farnese as the main protagonist of Guts’ half of the story during the MF arc. Just focus on her, show more stuff from her perspective, cut down a lot of fights but keep her digression back home, maybe give her some additional content that explores her character shift better, show her struggling more with her own inner darkness a bit when she first joins and give her some character beats as she slowly grows more comfortable with Casca, maybe put her backstory chapters in the first episode of a new season (a great season ender would be Guts walking away from the Hill of Swords js), etc.

lmao god I feel like I could keep going forever. sorry this is so meandering but ty for giving me the opportunity to go on and on about this. Is there anything you’d really like to change yourself?

[poseidonstrident]

So I need to talk about Street Fighter for a minute.

If you don’t care about fighting games then go no further but holy crap some stuff went down this weekend that I need to address. 

Season 3 for SFV is CRAZY. It’s like Capcom heard every problem we had with the cast list and said “fine, we’ll give you what you want for once.” Lets go down the list:

SAKURA IS BACK BOIS AND OMG SHE FINALLY GRADUATED. She’s the only character that we’ve seen gameplay of and honestly she looks exactly like I wanted her to. She’s a shoto (basically a character with Ryu and Ken’s basic move set) but her movement and some of the properties on her specials make her really distinct. She’s gonna be a really fun character to watch and play. 

BLANKA’S BACK AND HE LOOKS AS GOOFY AS EVER!! I love Blanka despite him being kind of annoying in past games. I can’t wait to see how he’s implemented in SFV. Plus he was introduced in the trailer running with Sakura which makes me happy cause they’ve always been really good friends in canon even though one of them is a young Japanese girl and the other one is a weird monster from the jungles of Brazil who loves his MAMA.

ED’S DESIGN ACTUALLY LOOKS REALLY COOL NOW THAT HE’S NOT THE ONLY ONE WEARING IT! Falke is a new character so there’s not much to say about her potential gameplay but I’m just really happy that they’re expanding on the possibility of Ed forming his own version of Shadaloo. Ed is slowing becoming a favorite character of mine and it’ll be neat to see how Falke fits into his story. I do want her to be her own character tho, I hope she gets a personality past just being Ed’s lackey.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHO/WHAT G IS??? Like honestly this is probably my least favorite design of the bunch but I’m ready to see what they do with him and how he fits into the world of Street Fighter. Maybe he has something to do with Q??? (We can only hope)

SAGAT IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME YOU SHOWED UP! Sagat is probably the most requested character for SFV and I’m surprised it took him this long to get put into the game. I just hope his character development from SFIV sticks and he’s still reformed and protecting defenseless orphans.

And last but certainly not least. 

LOOK AT MY BOI CODY, SHOWING EVERYBODY ON THE ROSTER WHAT’S UP! Cody is my second favorite character in all of Street Fighter (Just behind Akuma) and the fact that they took him out of the prison jumpsuit and LET HIM BREAK HIS CUFFS WHICH WERE THE ONLY THING LIMITING HIS POWER makes me PUMPED. Like the dude went from convict to classy and I am here for it. I can’t wait to see what his gameplay looks like because honestly Cody could be my main. 

I know this post was long but I needed to get this off my chest. Season 3 of SFV is the answer to a lot of people’s problems with SFV’s roster and with Arcade Edition fixing a lot of gameplay and content issues Capcom is showing that they actually do care about their player base and are willing to change based on criticism. The future of Street Fighter looks bright.

[survivormagictreehouse]

Episode #11 “Revenge? is a dish best served cold” -Ali

-all i have to say. all i have to say. is revenge? is a dish best served cold. that whole vote was a nightmare. but i've promised to be nicer in my confessionals/host chat so i'm gonna keep it nice. chips is completely a liar, like he just played into the bodhi plan for no reason and its so annoying! he thinks he is playing the middle with tact, but he is just playing it really like... wobbly. jess? never dissed. was honest with me, tried to keep me calm. I STAN JESS. i think she will probably win the season and i'm? here for it. i also love gavin and i feel so bad that he burned his idol for no reason. i feel like none of me/cindi/ruthie is making it to the end, so i hope to be able to vote for gavin or jess. collin is a sweetheart, definitely the best player on his side. i also love rachael now that is also a sweetheart. timmy i do not vibe with, am never hear for men calling women bitches. as men we can and should do better than gross crap like that. birch is lovely, they never seem to know whats up in this game JKFDAS but they are a sweetheart never the less!. anyway so i gave ruthie the idol? because i stick with my allies. and if people are calling us a trio, why not keep cindi as the big threat and ruthie as the disconnected 'easier vote', keeps me cushioned comfortably in the middle mhmm. it was definitely risky but also having two idols was making me feel literally SICK. so agenda moving forwards? work down from that. i also have a jury of men who are likely to dislike me so what can you do about THAT, i'm here to have fun and pull off some cracked shenanigans and i sure did just do that. would LOVE to continue voting off men next round, chips or timmy suits me fine idc which one. my agenda this season is to make sure one of gavin/jess/ruthie/cindi wins the season JNKFDAS screw the rest. they can all GO. but once again bodhi... this is what happens when you tussle with me. in the words of that one game of thrones character (i havent seen the show)... tell bodhi.. i want him to know it was me.

-two final thoughts: - trent has pointed out that this is the third vote out in a row where i said twenty-four hours before tribal 'i want it to be' and then said who left. that streak will DEFINITELY end tho JNKDAFS - i feel like idoling bodhi while unambitious, was good for my game. he has the capacity to come after me lategame, he was connected to people i wasnt, breaks up that voting block of 4 while keeping in collin/rachael who trust me more. im... at peace.

-https://youtu.be/Yy5THF05qjg (from the day after Bodhi left)

-hello okay so today has been... so illuminating? main points are that i do not trust jess, and do trust collin and rachael again? also chips is full of LIES. and as i took a 10min break from writing this i started second guessing myself again, maybe collin is lying. honestly everyone on this tribe is confusing. i've been defending this trio narrative all day but people maybe dont even care. also i feel bad for bodhi that is a king even tho he is so shady all the time as a player NJDFKLAS. cant wait to join him in jury.

-okay so i am once again frustrated. ruthie, gavin and cindi never dissed. rachael and collin are also all good, but the rest whewie. first up jess. jess is my friend and this is by no means a reflection of her as a person, but as a player oh my GOD she is so frustrating. she just has no like... conviction as a player? like jess what do you stand for in this game, what are you as a player. i said in my host chat but talking to her is like trying to staple jelly to a wall, as a player she just... is so. so hollow? idk i just wanna see her have conviction and to see her fight for something . chips is also frustrating as a player he just sits and has an agenda of 'splitting up groups', but all that happens is he gets picked up by a group to target another group, what has he... actually done? he is #2 on my angry list, and top spot is taken by... timmy. timmy i am talking to for the first time in a few days today and its incredibly frustrating. he is sending me this wall of excuses and i? do not want to hear it. i should not have to explain to a grown man that calling a woman a bitch, and he can say he 'snapped and crossed the line' and that it was out of character all he wants but i- do not want to hear it. timmy can be mad all he wants after he gets blindsided and say the entire tribe talks down to him, but then when he leaks cindi's ENTIRE PLAN, cindi isnt allowed to be mad at him? and cindi also kept it as GAME. this is what is so frustrating to me, i've had videos made about how annoying i am in games, i've had people say all sorts of gross personal stuff about me and so i dont wanna hear it. i've had people call my game the worst they have EVER see and i just sat there and took. i. do. not. want. to. hear. it. this game has reminded me of three things, how much i love ruthie (my undisputed closest ally at this point), how much i love olivia and lukas and how much i hate men.

WELL, WELL, WELL... another round of complete and utter RADIO SILENCE. with allegiances to almost everyone left in the game aside from chips, bodhi, and collin, this round was destined to be extremely hard to navigate. there was a lot of talk about breaking up the "trio" of ali, cindi, and ruthie. while i can recognize the danger of keeping a trio in, it is also an enormous target ahead of myself and my duo with jess. an alliance was formed between myself, jess, timmy, and rachael, and we essentially wanted to vote with timmy and rachael to avoid them feeling discluded from the vote and having no trust with us. despite the silence, ruthie's name began to rise above, which as much as i love ruthie, i wanted to be able to appease to timmy and rachael while still being in a "middle position" where i could play both sides that are starting to form. however, during the final fifteen minutes of the vote, CHAOS broke free. bodhi's name started get pushed by ruthie and ali, and as much as i loved that idea, the numbers were not there. so, i encouraged ruthie to play an idol on herself if she had one because otherwise she was leaving, so either way, i would not be at fault for her getting votes. however, bodhi began to try to push a back-up plan to get votes on me instead of him... and when ruthie played her idol, i couldn't risk it knowing how few votes it would take to control the outcome of the vote. so, i wasted my idol. HOWEVER, this seemed to work out well for me, because people seem to trust me a lot more and were very sympathetic towards me wasting it... so i am going to ride on that sympathy for the next few rounds.

So class, today we're going to talk about the difference between a villain and a bitch. I think the class is confused about the distinction. A villain plays the game for themselves. They do not take their alliances seriously or they use them to steam roll. I have been guilty of both of these within this game. I am a villain in this game. You can call me that and I will give you game-related sass back because that is what villains do. Call out my game. It has been chaotic and has a lot of flaws. It's ugly. It hurts people who thought they were close to me (almost everyone thought they were close to me at merge so someone's gettin hurt). A bitch is a personal insult. To call someone that implies that they have explicitly hurt you personally within this game. I would consider a bitch to be someone who, I don't know, attacks someone's personality because they didn't align with them in-game. I'm done with Timmy. He can continue pulling his "No one talks to me" card all he wants, it's a game move that I will never respect, especially when people did talk to you about the Keegan vote. And to be clear, people did talk to both Timmy and Rachael about the Keegan vote. They can claim no one talked to them but the idea was floated by them and they shut it down and Keegan found out about it shortly after. So someone leaked it to him. So when we're looking to get him out last minute I'm sorry that you are not on my list of who to call to vote him out. I've been a shit ally to both Rachael and Timmy and I legitimately was going to try to make that better. Now I think I'm just gonna keep voting Timmy till he's gone and if Rachael stays I'll switch to her. I probably won't actually do that, but I'm over it. I will not vote with Timmy, if I learn he's in on a plan I'm throwing my damn vote somewhere else. 

-SO... ALI SENT ME HIS IDOL and I used it and I didn't go home!  It sucks that I got so many votes and it looked like the one that blabbed was Chips which is disappointing but oh well. I can't believe at one time I trusted him more than Cindi and Ali.  I'm so glad I told her about the counting to get an advantage and not Chips because I really thought about it but Cindi was the last person I had PM'd and had kept  me in the loop so I told her.   Also we made another alliance with the three of us annnnd Gavin and Jess who were both down but as soon as I made it, neither one of them talked? Like...  I know everyone has a life but I expect people to be around when I make an alliance chat!! :k So... we will see what happens with that, the three of us may be screwed after all, lol. 

-I really hope that Cindi is going to stay... time will tell what will happen and who people can kind of trust. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcNPArwK8PM&feature=youtu.be

hello I am drinking at a wedding and hope I don’t get voted out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

This vote and this round are sad and ugly because it became personal. I still really don't know what to do but am sticking with the first person who talked to me today. Hoping that once either of the two is out of the game that this can turn back into being a game.

After the confrontation with Cindi last round, I knew this round was going to be tricky. In the challenge, we all had two secret books we had to figure out who's books belonged to who. I was able to somehow get everyones except for Ruthie and Cindi. Cindi lied about her books to someone else and they told me the lie (not knowing it was a lie) so the 4 points I missed were both of their books. After the vote, Cindi posted in the main chat that it had to be her or I who went home this round, which tore a lot of people up because they are friends with both of us and do not want to choose sides. I do not believe that Cindi posted that for people to choose sides, but more for her mental health. Sadly, to find that closure it does involve people choosing sides. So far, everyone besides Ali and Ruthie have told me in a way they are saving me, but this is survivor anything can happen. I am on my guard, but we will see when the vote comes down today. If I survive, this could become a large turning point for my game.

an exhausted gavin has made an appearance to his confessional... my main goal was to win immunity after misplaying my idol last round. can we talk about how embarrassing that is? luckily, i think i am positioned well enough where i am no one's first target, and if i am, not enough people would turn against me. i have been trying to play the middle, and this vote between cindi and timmy has definitely put that position into jeopardy. i just need to do my best to remain close to ali and ruthie, and then from there i can focus on taking out people like collin who is in a similar position as i am trying to play the middle. unfortunately, this vote is breaking my heart, but i don't want a trio to dominate the game as much as i love cindi. so, at this point, i am voting for her... but i am not opposed to her staying.

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Click HERE to watch the Round 11 Cast Assessment 

[sarahjane0886]

The Road To Us 25

Book 4 - Fully A Family - Chapter 1 - Getting Close

Pregnancy - Week 30

"Makssssss!" Peta yelled for her husband. She was standing in the kitchen when she realized something.

"What? Are you okay? Are Ella and Joe okay?" Maks said as he came flying into the kitchen, his socks slipping on the hardwood as he made a crash landing at his wife's feet.

"Oh my god, Maks!" Peta said as her eyes grew huge.

"I'm okay, I'm okay." He said as he stood up and looked at her. Her body started shaking with giggles as she realized he was okay.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh. You just, that...I'm sorry." She said as she controlled her giggles and moved to press a kiss to her husband's cheek.

"Whatever, miss." He huffed but laughed as well. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, I just wanted to talk to you about something." She said with wide eyes.

"Babe!!" He said with his hands on his hips.

"It's about Ella and Joe....we have a problem." She said with conviction.

"What???" He said alarmed.

"No, relax baby, they are fine. We still have a problem tho. We don't have anything done for their rooms and that's not okay!"

"Babe, you scared me." He said trying to look at her with a scolding look but failed miserably when she put her bottom lip out and pouted. She moved her body over to his and hugged him while pressing a kiss to his lips.

"Does that help?" She asked with a grin.

"We're getting there. A couple more and it'll be better." He teased as he kissed her quickly a few times making her giggle.

"Makssssss!" She whined after a few times.

"Right right the room."

"Yessss! We have nothing! We only have ten weeks left, what if I go early? What if we don't have anything for them? We can't bring them home to an empty bedroom! What are we going to do put them in laundry baskets to sleep?!"

"Well we could..." He trailed off as he saw her face shift into complete shock at his suggestion.

"We are not putting our babies in laundry baskets Maksim Chmerkovskiy!"

"Whoa pretty girl, I was teasing. We aren't I agree. We don't have anything today so do you want to work on that today?" He asked.

"Can we please? I'll feel much better when it's done. Or well at least if we have a few things done."

"Okay, we can do that. Where do you want to go? I'll go get the laptop and we can start."

"Swing please? And I have the notes from the shower of what people want to get, like my parents want to get the cribs. Your parents said the car seats. So that way we can talk with them and then let them know what we picked."

"Perfect. You go get that and I'll meet you on the swing." Maks said kissing her before they split ways only to meet up again on the porch.

"Okay, so are we doing one room or two?" Maks asked once they were seemingly set up.

"I don't know, what do you think? I mean I like one room but I feel like once they are older then we can split them if they want. If they were both boys or girls, they could probably stay together the whole time."

"I agree, for now, for them and for us i feel like one room is easier. Then as they get older even like 4/5 we can see if they want their own."

"Perfect. So I think we should stick to simple since it'll be for boy and girl. And maybe do Ella's side more fairytale style with Joe's being more modern?" Peta suggested.

"Okay, I like that. You want to do like white as the furniture color? And then what do we want to do, like one main wall and then have them each have their own wall? Or corner? How do we smush these two together?" He said getting flustered making Peta giggle.

"Whoa baby, I like white as the furniture. But let's just look and see what we find, then we can see if we can piece things together."

"Okay, sorry. I...I don't know. So we're using the guest room that's down from ours right? The one with the walk in closet?"

"Yeah, that's the one we picked right?"

"Yup, so we do have four walls. Maybe we can do the cribs in opposite corners and then make them kinda meet in the middle?" Maks said closing his eyes as he thought.

"I like that."

"Do you have any colors in mind?" He asked looking over at her.

"Kinda, I was thinking gray as a solid color. Maybe we could do the walls in the a light gray and have darker gray accents but then soft little pink for Ella, and yellow for Joe." Peta said watching her husband not sure how he was going to feel about the yellow for their son.

"I'm skeptical on the yellow pretty girl but let's look and then we'll see." He said.

"I figured you'd not be so sure on that one. Look first please and then we'll see. I promise it's not girly and I think the three colors with white furniture together will be extra sweet." Peta said as she rested her head on his shoulder as he began to look. He started with the yellow figuring if he did hate it he was going to either have to do some work to make sure that he did like it or convince his wife to change her mind.

"Hmm...." He said after a few moments of searching.

"Good Hmm?" Peta asked pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

"I actually like it. As long as we go with a hard yellow and not a soft one or a fluorescent one like the one in this picture." He said showing her a picture of a babies room that was elephant themed with gray and white being the main colors and then had accents of yellow mixed in.

"I agree. I like that shade and I think it'll blend well with the pink I'm thinking for Ella. Look for pink rooms and I'll show you what I mean." She said. He flipped to looking through pink rooms until he came across the one that Peta had seen in her previous searching. It was a gray room with pink & gold accents. The pink was more of a soft deep pink rather than cotton candy pink or baby pink. It was something that could be grown with through the years.

"I do like that one too. And honestly I'm not typically a gold person but I love that crib." Maks said as he made the picture larger so they could look at the crib. It was a gold wrought iron crib and then it had the pink details mixed in on the bedding.

"I do too. And I'll bet we could maybe find one for Joe in a silver, almost gray color." Peta said as she thought for a few minutes.

"I like it." Maks said. And with that they began searching for different things for the room. It took some time but they found a crib that they liked for Joe that would basically match Ella's but was just in a deep dark silver that would keep the theme the same. Then they moved to figuring out a decoration for each baby. They wanted to do something with their names above their cribs just to accent that that was their side of the room. It took some searching but eventually they found something for each of them. Joe's was a dark gray shelf with his name in block letters underneath. On the top it said our little mvp. It was super adorable yet still kept their theme going. The picture they had found had a little lamb sitting on the shelf but Peta wanted to look for a tiny elephant.

Ella's name accent was a little more extravagant. It was her name in gold letters with a cloth ribbon banner hanging underneath. It was absolutely gorgeous in Peta's mind. After some more searching they found a set of rockers that they liked. Both of them being oversized because they figured it would be perfect for snuggles especially when the kids got older and were a little bigger. They went with white even though they were both skeptical considering it was for a babies room but they figured they could get throw blankets to put in the room as well.

The furniture, which was going to include changing tables, a dresser, and a bookshelf were all picked in white. They then moved on to car seats and strollers. Peta had Maks start a registry so they could just send that out to the families and then that way they could pick if they wanted to get something or not. They were going to order the furniture and décor, that way they could start on the room.

The found little shelves that could hold books or things for the kids as they grew that they added to their cart. They were able to customize them so Ella's were pink with gray edges & Joe's were yellow with gray edges. They also found wire tables that they got to put next to the rockers. They decided to just get both of those in the kid's colors as well. They were getting ready to wrap up what they were getting for the day when Peta realized they needed something else.

"We need a rug." Peta said as she yawned slightly.

"And someone needs a nap." Maks teased gently.

"That's your babies fault." Peta said indignantly. She grumbled a bit realizing he was right.

"Why don't you lay down pretty girl?" He asked as he laced their fingers together.

"Because....we're doing this." She muttered.

"We can keep doing it later. I won't do anything without you." He said as he shut the laptop with his free hand.

"Will you stay till I'm sleeping?" She asked softly. She was cuddly as is but the pregnancy had sent her hormones into overdrive and having him near her just kept her calm.

"Of course. And actually why don't we move you to our bed. I know your back has been bothering you and you'll probably sleep better in there." He said pressing a kiss to her hair.

"Okay." She agreed. So he stood up and helped her up before laying the laptop inside the house. They could finish this up later. She headed into the bathroom before meeting him on the bed. He helped her get situated as she snuggled her body into his. Her favorite way to lay was with her ear on her chest but since she had gotten bigger it had been a hard thing to accomplish. Maks had learned to lay further away from her so that she could rest on his chest and just not press into him like usual.

"Comfy pretty girl?" He asked softly as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"Mmhmm." She hummed into him. He chuckled at how quick she went out when she was tired. He knew she hated admitting how much the pregnancy had worn her out especially recently but he tried to keep an eye on it and help her rest when he could. He felt her fall asleep nearly immediately and was going to get up to do some work things but decided against it.

He looked down and saw her bump peaking out just slightly from the edge of where his shirt had become too small on her. He ran his hand down and rested it gently as he stroked the smooth skin of her belly. He felt a gentle kick under his hand and grinned in response. That feeling never ceased to amaze him. He loved feeling the tiny movements of their babies as they grew.

"Hi Miss Ella." He whispered softly after he figured out which twin it was. He chuckled slightly as it crossed his mind that they could very easily have flipped places and he could be talking to Joe.

"So it's almost time for you and your brother in there to come out and meet your Momma and me. I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am for that day. Ever since I met your momma, even before we broke up the first time I knew she was it. I knew she was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with. That sounds silly cause I was with another lady at the time but it didn't feel right. You'll learn when you get older that sometimes your belly just tells you what's what. And that's what it did that day. I could almost picture your momma in my life. And us having little kids like you and your brother. I sure can't wait to meet you both. I'll bet you're a lot like you're mother. Or well I hope you are because I think she's kind of awesome." He felt a few more kicks and movements and just stopped for a few moments as he marveled at the fact of what was going on inside of his wife.

"You're brother is awfully quiet in there little one. Or did you just need some papa time? Either way, I'll enjoy these moments, now and when you're out. Momma and I worked on you and Joe's room today. I think you're going to love it. We'll make sure it's just girly enough for you but manly enough for Joe. Although if you like the opposite we can do that too. We'll always do our best to make sure the two of you are happy. I promise that because we love you. Both of you lots. And I love all of you so so much." Maks said getting slightly choked up. He stopped and tried to collect himself but he was interrupted.

"Maks." Peta's sleepy voice echo'd out.

"Yes pretty girl?" He said softly groaning that he had gotten caught.

"We love you too." She said as she tipped her head back and caught his lips with hers. He smiled at her sleepy expression and just drew her in a little more before she drifted off back to sleep and he remained there just enjoying the quiet time he had with his girl and babies.

**That's a wrap! It's back!! Hope you guys enjoyed this one. I'm going to countdown the weeks until the babies make their appearance so if there's anything you'd like to see or hear or read let me know! Don't forget to like this one up and let me know what you thought! Thank you all!

[drugrattes-blog]

repost don’t reblog!

tagged by: @overoutrage ( yells thank u ) tagging: steal it if u want we can be thieves ... together...​

GENERAL

name:  vera birthday:  16 / 06 sexual orientation: hetero p much ye ye school status: third year of highschool ( idk how it is in english lmao ... )

YES/NO

drink?:  i taste n’ try smoke?:  nope eat cake?:  when i can, yes! believe in true love?:  frankly i’ve never had any kind of experience and i’m still sixteen so? i don’t know? i’m not even rushy about it lmao, i just wanna have a super chill relationship when it comes, if it comes soon enough. so my answer is shrug emoji afraid of the dark?:  not really cat person?:  i love ducks fuck me on a fridge ( yes i love cats & i have one too ) virgin?:  yepperoni

FAVORITES

shampoo: anything cheap for curly hair disney song: friends on the other side - princess & the frog / hellfire - the hunchback of notredame !! actress/actor: jake gyllenhaal, edward norton, emma stone and um... idk !! car: i dont care about cars enough person:  ahh eh... irl people? i dont have favourites ( im sorry im not good at socializing ) but i quite like my friend sofia, my two friends rebecca’s ( they’re named both rebecca yes ) and most of my female classmates, along with diego i think, and my mom’s boyfriend type of weather: i hate all weathers. all of them. but i like slightly chilly weather color: salmon pink -- tho i love all colors 90s sitcom:  i never watched any... :’)

QUESTIONS

what is your special talent/skill as a roleplayer?   do i even have any tbh. i just write whatever flows to me? i try to both be active, as in i try to write and make sure my muse does something ( unless the thread’s based heavily on thoughts / speech / psychological stuff ) , all while still trying to make sure their emotions and thoughts show. im not sure if im good at achieving that but well, i have fun writing, and i like what i write, so it’s okay, i think?

what is your favorite type of roleplay genre, and why?    fluff... cute shit... romantic ... friendships... but also DEVELOPMENT! i also have a soft spot for gore-heavy themes ( physical stuff more than the psychological sutff, tho i’d like to explore that maybe? sometime? maybe by drabbling for myself smth ) , and i like making my muses grow, even if subtly. i also live for threads that involve arguing that leads to somewhere, even arguing that leads nowhere, tho, if that makes sense. AND FUNNY COMEDIC SHIT, I LIVE FOR THAT, I LOVE WRITING FUNNY THINGS!! all while hoping its not fun just for me ofc lmao

why did you pick your muse?    oh man, joan was just a side-character to another muse? franziska? but then i thought, hey, what about i try to rp this jackass, and whoops. there she is, miss america. i’m debating wether or not trying to give her some sort of story or just keep her as a ‘mascot’, i don’t know, but she’s being put so much effort in it feels almost like...  voidly to me to just do nothing else with her. she’s just so fun to write and draw.

if you could write any other muse - but know you don’t have the muse for him/her - who would it be?    a lot. a lot of my ocs. my dr ocs, my psg ocs, my indie ocs, the trash sisters convict & trash star along with the clumsy dj double, sandra, mr. zoe!! and tracy and all of my muses from my own canon! and lilith and wolfie aahh even if lilith and wolfie are quite nsfw due to the fact they’re prostitutes so-- i mean, in short, i’d write a LOT of muses, if i could. i have a lot of ocs.

what is one thing you think you need to work on as a partner?    heck im terrible at convos? like i’m shit bc i tend to drop them at some point, if i dont feel like replying... or just dont know HOW to reply. plus i drop silently threads, im a bit guilty abt that, even tho i think it’s necessary for me to decrease stress sometimes. i mean its not a bad thing but?? im too anxious to go up and say ‘hey wanna do another thread bc im dropping x this one’ just ? HECK

what would be your warning label to other roleplayers?   im a fluff monster and i fucking love ducks oh my god

what is your favorite episode/scene of your muse?    oh man. oh man. i dont have it... yet. i mean, there is one, but it has yet to happen. i’m plannin’ it tho. also tbh, joan’s relationship with drugs is in general... my fav thing. like it may seem such a filmsy reason to others as to why she does drugs, but for me? i think it’s essential. i’ve watched movies and read stories about drug addicts that got into it the way a kid usually gets into cigarettes -- either to be part of the group or either because they needed some relief, a detachment from reality, and like... it’s always been interesting to me. i’ve never did this kinda stuff, heck, ofc i don’t plan to out of my simple choice ( cigarettes mostly, drugs r srs danger wtf ) , but i’m trying my best to interpret this mindset of joan. plus the fact she’s been actually influenced by her own interests to do so, to be like others in order to stick around others, is interesting in itself. along with joan and her parents’ relationship, and their subtle pressure they put on her, unknowingly. it’s just. whoa. fucking hell.

what crack!ships do you have for your muse?   joan and rehab, joan and mac and cheese, joan and an healthy ring of friends, joan... joan and cats as a hateship.

what is your senpai blog?   none! i consider everyone equals to me wtf.

[fireballofinsanity]

All the symbols for Sera

Send me a symbol for a headcanon!

And ya’ll thought I was done. XD

☠ : Are there any recent/daily thoughts they have about death or dying?

Only when there’s a thunderstorm. She’s absolutely terrified of them, and the fear one can kill her/those she loves/ those around her sticks due to a pat experience.

☯ : Do they believe for every darkness there is a lightness? If not, why?

Definitely. It doesn’t matter on the verse, Sera is a pure, strong light. She’s seen far too much darkness in her life; there is a light in the world, and it’s fighting that darkness. It just takes the form of people like herself, those who help and smile.

♥ : Name one thing about the way their emotions work that they despise.

Her inability to stop fussing over things. People she helps, Sin, Yato, Yuma, her kids, that thing down the street- she just can’t stop fussing and sometimes it’s too much for even her.

☆ : Would they ever wish upon a falling star? If so, what would they wish?

Peace and happiness, especially for her loved ones and peace for the entire world. For Sin, that he never has reason to stop smiling.

☁ : Describe how they would spend a stormy, overcast/rainy day.

If it’s not raining too hard, she’s outside, jumping around in puddles and enjoying the rain like a little kid. Thunderstorms send her into hiding and a panic attack, and anything else has her tending to chores and family and playing games and the like inside.

☂ : Storms or clear skies?

Definitely clear skies. If it never thundered again, she’d be a happy duck-

εжз : What about nature do they find calming? What about nature do they find disagreeable?

The sea; Sera loves sitting by the sea, watching the waves roll, listening to the sounds they make - it’s calming and peaceful, just like the forest after it rains, where the smells and sounds of chirping birds ease her into a smile. One thing she doesn’t like tho is things like snakes, spiders, and how devastating the weather can get - Snakes legit make her shudder and spiders will send her onto her desk to hiss like a cat. NOPE-

☎ : List three or more people they would call out for during an emergency.

For her Magi verse, Sin, Ja’far, Shayan, and Sharrkan. For Noragami, Yato and Yukine, and for Zexal, Yuma.

☛ : What is their typical response to being given orders?

Normally, she listens; the ones who generally give her orders are people like SIn and Yato, and only when it’s absolutely nesescary. If an enemy or someone she doesn’t get along with tries to, she’ll become a sassmaster and make you regret it. XD

☢ : Describe a thought or dream that would cause them to have a mental meltdown.

Seeing her friends and family die in a dream, and thinking of losing them. Her friends and family are her world, and her family especially is her core. If you take them away, it’ll completely shatter her, so just thinking of losing them is terrifying. Any dreams having to do with her past and the hell she lived through, too, is a surefire way to wake her up and put her into instant meltdown mode until she realizes she’s safe now.

✄ : Are there any reasons why they would ever think of self-harm? If so, what are they?

No. She’s cut herself before in her Magi verse, but it’s to prove a point to someone - A “See? We bleed the same, get hurt the same, get cut the same” type of a point. otherwise, she’d never do it.

❤ : Describe a physical action that shows complete trust.

Letting them get close to her. It’s not an uncommon thing to be physically close to her, but with someone she trusts, she’ll sidle up to them, nudge them, loop an arm around theirs, etc- she’s fairly affectionate, but for the most part it’s shown the most with people she trusts completely.

❥ : Describe a verbal way they would express complete trust.

By telling them, but like Aoi, Sera divulges things. The biggest one would be telling them about her past, but even that is rare. For the most part, her tone becomes warmer, softer, and sweeter, full of love, and sound even more trusting than, say, with a visiting neighbor.

✗ : Explain how they portray feelings of hostility or dislike.

By being sassy. Sassmaster Sera is her go to defense across all the verses; if you’re trying to make her hostile and upset, she’s just going to snark at you. In her Magi verse, if you’re really trying to make her angry and touch her family, she’s gonna be touching you with the sharp end of her sword.

⊗ : What is something that causes them to question themself?

Having her convictions and morals called into question. She’s normally rather sure of herself and the things she wants (Peace, unity, equality), but if someone starts to call all of it into uestion and provide her with reasons she could be wrong, she’s going to step back and question herself on the spot while trying to defend herself.

☾ : On a sleepless night, what would they be found doing?

Chores. XD Not even kidding, she’ll get up and do chores, or snuggle closer into SIn and try harder to sleep, maybe read - more so in her Noragami verse than anywhere else - or go check on the rest of her family. If all else fails, she’ll go down to the kitchen and try to bake.

☤ : Is there anything about their health they are continuously on edge about? Something they disregard?

Not really anything she’s constantly on edge about? She does worry a lot before she had kids about getting pregnant, since it’s difficult for her to conceive, and while pregnant fusses over everything, since they tend to be hard on her, but otherwise not really? She does however completely disregard her health in its entirety if it means getting work done or helping people. Fairly common for her.

✓ : Name at least two people who can trust them with their life.

Yato, Sinbad, her kids, Yukine, Ja’far, Sharrkan, Yuma-

❣: Describe a way that will earn affection (whether platonic or romantic) from them.

Trust her. Be friendly towards her. If you show you’re willing to trust and care about her, she’s going to show you the same, and that always comes with her unique brand of affectionate friendship. It’s not hard to get her to be highly affectionate with her friends. XD

✖ : Describe a way to make them uneasy or apprehensive.

Show aggression toward her or her family and friends, actively try to hurt them, act sly and cunning… In her Magi verse, just fall. She’s a fair bit sensitive to darkness and gets uneasy when it’s nearby, gaining a strong desire to collect her family and keep them close to her so she can protect them. It’s a feeling she often confuses for nerves, though, and can suppress the feeling if she can figure out that’s what it is, as seen with her half-fallen husband, who doesn’t trigger that feeling anymore (even if she is aware of what he is) and Judal, who she’s fairly comfortable with,though more on edge that she’s going to anger him than she is over his darkness.

♆ : Are they prone to violent outbursts or thoughts?

Absolutely not. If you’re trying to hurt her family, she’s going to hurt you, but aside from that Sera is calm, sweet, and only learns how to fight so she can defend herself/her loved ones. She’s not going to just punch someone for no reason.

✏ : What are their creative outlets?

Helping people and chores. XD She does like to sing and dance, actually, and puts a lot into her dancing.

✉ : Do they tend to rely on words or actions more?

Both, but perhaps actions a bit more than words. You can say “I’ll protect you”, but if you don’t go through with it physically, she’s not going to believe you. It’s why she always shows through actions more than words, though they do mean a lot.

♡ : Is there a certain scent that brings about nostalgia? If so, describe a memory this scent brings back.

The smell of nature always reminds her of when she was on her own and homeless. It’s a good sort of memory; she liked camping and sleeping in trees, falling asleep to the sound of the crickets and waking to birds chirping! Granted she sleeps a lot better now, but still-

۞: Are there any inner demons they can never seem to get rid of? What are they?

They’re demons born from her past, which I’m not going to get too deep into here for the sake of my dash; demons that tell her how worthless she is, how she deserves nothing, she’s helpless and pathetic and useless and unwanted- The worst part is a lot of these were born from her birth family’s treatment of her and two other meetings in her teen years. No matter what she does, she just can’t beat them - she can bury them and live a happy life, but they always come back.