#still sad to see him step down but i understand why he is

[wikiangela]

you're my happily ever after (so i'll take my chance now, risk it all somehow)

rating: G

words: 2.6k

8x06 fix-it, because I'm pissed - I or my fics aren't going anywhere tho <3

thank you to @evansboyfrend for beta reading, ily 🫶

[also on Ao3]

It feels like the whole world is crumbling down. It feels like the Earth should shake, burst on fire, open up and swallow everything around. As dramatic as it is, he kind of expects it to happen, and it’s weird that he’s still sitting here. His ears are ringing, panic rising in his chest with each of Tommy’s words. He watches Tommy get up and head for the door, and he’s frozen to his spot. It’s not- it can’t be. It fucking can’t be. “Wait,” he finally manages to say, trying to keep his voice from trembling, “did you just break up with me?” He asks, hoping to any entity that listens that he just misinterpreted it, that he got it wrong. Because- because he can’t lose Tommy. He’s falling for him so fast and so hard. He’s ready for the next step. He’s ready to move in together. He’s ready to talk about one day, eventually, maybe getting married. He knows he wants that. He knows what he wants, and he wants Tommy.  “Yeah, I guess I did.” Tommy answers, glancing back at him, his expression sad but firm. But Buck knows him. Knows that this mask will crumble into something devastated as soon as he leaves. That Tommy’s heart will shatter, just as Buck’s is right now. He can see through Tommy, he knows that he cares about Buck. It just- it doesn’t make sense. What was he even talking about… It was all so much, so fast, Buck’s brain is still scrambling trying to understand it all.  “Believe me, I didn’t see-” Tommy starts, but Buck shakes his head and interrupts him. “No.” He stands up, his legs feeling shaky. Tommy fully turns towards him, confusion in his face. “What do you mean, ‘no’?” He frowns.

“I mean, no, you’re not breaking up with me.” Buck says more confidently than he feels. Because this can’t be it. The last six months, the best six months of his fucking life, can’t end like this. Can’t end at all. He won’t have this. “I know you care about me. And I care about you. And I don’t want to break up.” He sees Tommy open his mouth to speak, his expression hardening – putting on a mask again, trying to hide the hurt. He speaks again before Tommy can. “If you truly, genuinely want this, not because you think it’s gonna be better for me or you, but because you don’t want to be with me, fine, I can respect that. But I won’t accept it without a fight. I- I wanna fight for us, Tommy.” Buck steps closer to him, hoping that Tommy doesn’t step back, that might just break him. He doesn’t, he’s stuck in place, sad eyes on Buck’s. “Let me fight for us. You-” he adds quickly, on a roll now, not wanting Tommy to interrupt until after he’s done, after he’s said his piece. He needs to say it all now, let Tommy know how he feels. He can’t watch him leave without trying to fix it first. Tommy’s looking at him intently, just listening, not even trying to speak. “You gave me a second chance once, when I fucked up our first date, and I- I want to believe it wasn’t for nothing. So- so you’re my first man, so what?” Buck throws his hands up in frustration, he thinks he’s starting to sound a little frantic, speaking faster and faster. He just can’t let Tommy leave without him knowing exactly how Buck feels. “It’s far from my first relationship ever. Why- why is it so different just because you’re a man? It shouldn’t be. I don’t need to date other people, experiment or whatever else. I’ve dated people, slept around, did it all. I know how that goes, how it feels, and I don’t want to do it again. I know what I want, Tommy. And I want you. And don’t you dare tell me how I feel.” He feels anger seep in, Tommy’s words ringing in his head. What the actual fuck was he thinking? “I’m a grown man, I know how I feel. Yeah, it’s new and exciting, but it’s also real. It’s real to me, and- and if there’s any chance of forever, I want to take it. And-” he takes a breath. He feels like he’s been speaking in one breath, feeling a little lightheaded now, his heart hammering. Or maybe that’s just the panic. “And don’t start with the whole ‘I’m not your last’ bullshit.” He shakes his head again, tears welling up in his eyes, anger still building. Really, what in the world? How could Tommy want to just throw away the most wonderful relationship that’s happened to Buck in years? Maybe ever? “You don’t know that. I don’t know that. Yeah, we could break up one day. But you could also be my forever, and I could be yours. I’d love a chance to find out, even if it hurts in the end. But maybe that’s just me. Maybe I’m the only one here brave enough to risk it. And- and what about my heart, huh?” Tears are threatening to spill, his voice shaking now, with sadness and anger, and desperation. He can’t let him go, he can’t. “You said I’d break your heart eventually. But this, right now? This is you breaking mine.” He finishes, almost panting now, his monologue taking the wind out of him, wanting to say everything on his mind, in his heart. He hopes he got his point across. 

“Evan.” Tommy just whispers, with a pained expression. There are tears in his eyes, too, one lone one slipping through, falling down his cheek. Buck’s hand itches to reach out and wipe it off, but he’s not sure if he’s allowed to anymore. 

“Give us a chance, Tommy. Let us fight for this. Fight for me, for us. Fight with me.” He’s aware he sounds like he’s begging at this point, but he doesn’t care. This is too important. “I thought it’s been so good between us lately-”

“It has!” Tommy rushes to say. “It’s been amazing. You make me so happy. That’s why I’m scared, I just- I’m sorry, Evan, but I can’t let myself get hurt like this again. Because I- I’ve been there before, and it was hard to get back up, and with you- I don’t think I’d be able to ever recover from this one.” He admits, his stone-faced facade crumbling, and Buck can see his own feelings reflected in Tommy’s expression. Sad, devastated, heartbroken. 

“We can- we can take some time apart.” Buck says around a lump in his throat. He feels like he can’t breathe. All he wants is to rewind until before he dropped the moving in bomb which must be what made Tommy freak out. He could say anything else, and take it slower, and maybe they’d be on their way out right now, a date night like they planned. “If that’s what you need. A break. But not for good. And then let’s come back to it clear-headed, knowing for sure what we want. And if you still want to break up, I- I’ll respect that. But I already know what I want,” he repeats firmly, decisively. “I want a future with you. I want to move in together, and one day down the line get married, and- and I want it all with you. We can slow down if I’m rushing this. I tend to do that, and if it’s scaring you, I’m sorry.” He adds, not wanting to backtrack any of this, but aware of how intense he’s coming off. He’s never been more serious about anything in his life. “But the past six months have been the best in my life. I’ve never felt so happy, so free, so comfortable, so safe. And I’m not giving up on you, Tommy. I will fight for you until I can’t anymore, until you tell me that you don’t care about me and I should just fuck off.”

“Evan. You know I’ll never say that.” Tommy responds quietly.

“I know. Because I’m confident in us, in the fact that you do care, and you do want me. I know that.” Buck emphasizes, and realizes, not for the first time, that he never felt like this before. This secure. This confident about someone wanting him. “I also know you’re just trying to protect yourself, your heart, and I get it. But I can’t let you go without a fight. I won’t. I messed up a lot in my life, and I won’t mess up this. I refuse to. Because I-” he takes a sharp breath, the words pressing on his lips. He doesn’t want to say it for the first time in a possible break up, a moment of such anger and devastation. But he needs to put it all out there. Needs Tommy to understand how much he’s trying to throw away right now. “I love you, Tommy.” He confesses, sees Tommy’s face melt into the saddest expression Buck’s ever seen on anyone, tears spilling freely now. Both of theirs, he realizes, feeling wetness on his cheeks. “I’ve been falling for you a little bit more with each day we spend together, with each minute. And I know- I hope you feel the same. But if you can look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t-” he swallows thickly, the thought alone is too much to bear. 

“I can’t do that.” Tommy interrupts quickly. “Of course I love you, Evan. It happened so quickly it kind of scared me a little.” 

“I noticed.” Buck says dryly, and Tommy lets out a humorless chuckle. “If you ask me, which you didn’t, by the way, you decided for both of us, which was an asshole move,” he points out, and Tommy looks away, as if ashamed. Good. Buck loves him, which means he’s gonna call out when he’s acting shitty. “I’d rather give us a real try and get my heart shattered if it comes to this, instead of always wondering what if, always wondering if you’re my one who got away. Which you would be.”

“I’m sorry.” He shakes his head, takes a step towards Buck, now just half a step away. “I’m sorry, maybe breaking up is too hasty. Impulsive,” he scoffs at himself, probably remembering how he called Buck that just a few minutes ago. Well, so maybe they’re both a little impulsive. Not a problem, in Buck’s opinion. “I don’t- I don’t want to break up. I never want to be away from you.” He says, his voice barely above a whisper. His hand flinches at his side, like he wants to reach out, grab Buck’s, touch him. Buck hopes he does. “It just- it seemed too fast. Like you got wrapped up in the moment. It’s still so new, I thought we were taking it one step at a time, and I didn’t-” he takes a deep breath, as if bracing himself, and Buck knows what he says is going to sting – and it does, it feels like a gut punch, actually, “I didn’t think you were as serious about this as I was getting. And I realize we should’ve done the mature thing and talked it out. I’m sorry. It’s just, we’ve barely talked about any future here. But I want it, of course I do. I’m just- I’m scared. My heart has never been in this much danger.” He looks into Buck’s eyes as he says it, more vulnerable than ever. This is everything Buck wants right now, for them to talk, to discuss this, to try fixing it, instead of one of them running away and the other giving up and not fighting for it. Buck’s been there, he doesn’t want a repeat.

“Tommy.” Buck is the one to close the distance between them, carefully brings his hands up to cup Tommy’s face, giving him a chance to back away, but he doesn’t. Instead, he breathes out a sigh of relief, like he craved Buck’s touch as much as Buck craves his. “You remember when I told you I wanted something with you? Even though I didn’t know what that something was yet?” he asks and Tommy nods slightly, Buck’s palms still resting on his cheeks. “I’ve been serious about you since that precise moment. About pursuing this, and wanting some kind of future with you. I know I tend to rush into things, it’s been a problem before.” He huffs a self-deprecating laugh. “I tried not to do that with you, but I failed, clearly. I just think from now on, we both should stay and talk and try to work it out if we have any issues with something. If you still want me.” He adds a little anxiously, but relaxed when he feels Tommy’s palms settle on his hips.

“Of course I want you, Evan. I always will.” Tommy says, that loving look in his eyes, that always makes Buck’s heart melt a little. That look that Buck loves so much, that made him think that Tommy might feel the same way.

“Good. Like I said, I’m not letting you go. Ever.” He says decisively, a huge weight that’s been there since the topic even started finally lifting off his chest. This might be the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and no matter the conclusion ��� which he’s pretty sure will be the happily ever after he’s always craved – it’s worth the risk, it’s worth everything.

“Good.” Tommy echoes, that gorgeous, scrunchy smile of his slowly spreading on his face, and it’s like sunshine came out from behind stormy clouds. “I don’t intend on letting you go, either. I love you, sweetheart. And I’m so sorry for… for this mess. For overreacting.”

“That’s fine, we’re past this- well, actually, we are gonna talk about it more, but at least we’re on the same page now, I hope.” Buck says, slowly leaning in. “I love you so much. I never want to lose you.”

“I’m sorry.” Tommy says again, and Buck just wants him to stop saying it. It’s fine, they’re fine now. “You won’t. You have me for as long as you want. I promise.”

“What if I want you forever?” Buck whispers, his face so close to Tommy's, their lips almost brush. It sends a shiver down his spine, like he hasn’t kissed him in days, when they just exchanged a quick kiss hello a few minutes ago.

“That works for me.” Tommy smiles again, and finally dives in for a kiss, but it lasts barely a second before he’s pulling away, Buck trying to follow. Tommy chuckles, running a comforting hand up and down Buck’s side. “But maybe let’s put a pause on the whole moving in together thing, huh? At least until we fully talk everything through.”

“Yeah, good idea.” Buck nods, his gaze flickering between Tommy’s eyes, now sparkling happily, and his pretty, kissable lips. It feels so good to be able to just have a mature conversation and resolve whatever issues arise. If they keep doing that, he thinks they’re going to be okay. He’ll make sure of that. “No need to be impulsive,” he adds, his lips twisting into a teasing smirk.

“Okay.” Tommy chuckles quietly, his cheeks reddening. “Just kiss me.” 

Buck doesn’t need to be told twice. He kisses Tommy like he means it, like he’s his person, like he’s the love of his life, trying to put all those emotions into a kiss. He knows for sure he’s getting the same intent back. And at this moment, in his kitchen, narrowly avoiding losing his love because of a stupid reason, he decides it. One day, not too quickly, but not too far into the future, he’s going to ask Tommy Kinard to marry him. And he’s more than sure of the response he’ll get.

[also on Ao3]

[famoussharkhairdoknight]

Too late~ Jude Bellingham

Wearning: angst, sad, english is not my first language.

The rain was falling lightly, drumming on the glass of the window as you sat in the small café where you now went every Thursday night with him, your new boyfriend. The warm light inside contrasted with the grayness of the day outside. It seemed like one of those quiet evenings, where nothing in particular could disturb your peace. But you hadn’t considered that he, Jude, might come back.

You see him walk in, tall and confident as ever, but with an expression you had never seen before: vulnerable, almost unsure. His bright eyes find you immediately, and at that moment, you realize he’s here for you.

You feel your heart race. Your boyfriend, sitting next to you, notices the change in your expression and squeezes your hand slightly, curious about the look on this stranger’s face.

“Can I talk to you?” Jude asks, staring at you without hesitation. His voice is low, almost pleading, and for a moment, you hesitate. Your boyfriend looks from him to you, and you understand that this is a decision only you can make.

You nod and stand up, following him outside. The rain is heavier now, and you shield yourself under the umbrella he’s holding. Jude looks like he wants to speak immediately, but he stays silent, as if he’s trying to find the right words.

“Why are you here, Jude?” you finally ask, breaking the silence.

He looks at you intensely, as if he wants to memorize your face. “I made a mistake, letting you go.”

“It’s been too long,” you reply firmly, even though his gaze brings a pang to your chest. “I’m happy with someone else now.”

Jude shakes his head, his eyes glistening. “I know. But I can’t ignore it anymore. I realized that nothing means anything without you. I tried to forget you, to convince myself it was better this way, but I can’t.” He steps closer, his tone desperate. “Please, tell me it’s not really too late.”

His words hit you, reigniting old feelings you thought you had left behind. “You can’t just come back now, after all this time. I’ve closed that door.”

“But that door was open, even if I didn’t know it,” he counters, coming closer still. “You’re the one who made everything make sense, and I realized it only when you weren’t there. I know it was a mistake, but I want to make it right. I need you.”

You feel his words cut deep. You look at him and see the boy who first made your heart race. But then you think of your boyfriend, his kindness, his respect, and you feel you owe him loyalty.

“Jude,” you murmur, your voice barely a whisper. “If you really loved me, you wouldn’t have left.”

He lowers his gaze, and for the first time, he seems to lose that confidence he always had. “You’re right. And maybe I’ve lost everything, and I realized it too late. But I wanted to tell you. Even if you’ll never want me again, I wanted you to know that you’re the most important thing.”

His words are a direct blow to your heart, and he notices. He takes a step back, as if to give you space, as if he finally understands that there’s now a wall between you that he can’t break down.

“Goodbye, Jude,” you whisper.

“Goodbye,” he murmurs, with a sad smile.

[dragon-tamer-1]

Man, watching MatPat's latest video had me in tears, gonna miss him telling the newest theories.

[hedgehog-moss]

Last spring my neighbour asked if I could let Pirlouit mow the grass around his barn from time to time, which Pirou was happy to do at first but if I left him there several days in a row he got pretty sad about being alone (lots of wistful, melancholy braying). So this year when my donkey was hired for this job again, I went for a different formula: for the past few weeks I've been bringing all the animals to the neighbour's barn for an hour of landscaping services now and then at apéritif time.

The fence is extremely not Pampe-proof so I have to have my apéritif while sitting on the road in a strategic position from which I can toss a stick in her direction if she tries to escape, but other than that I've been really enjoying this peaceful evening ritual, just sitting there reading and watching the animals while feeling like I'm doing my neighbour a favour. Pirlouit doesn't get all the grass to himself anymore but I've learnt that he prefers to be rich in friends than in food.

You'll notice that Merricat is present in every photo, looking alert. She too has been hired, but for the thankless job of Thought Police. She may look like she's just napping on the warm asphalt with not a care in the world...

... but she is working! Keeping an eye on the llamas, always.

I've discovered that in a specific context my three cats can act as precogs and warn me of Pampe's future crimes. My theory is that they developed this skill because of Poldine, who loves cats. Any cat who enters the pasture will soon be noticed and (lovingly) chased by Poldine, who wants kisses. Cats not only do not want llama kisses, they don't differentiate between individual llamas. They are all potential kissers. So even if it looks like she's all relaxed, Merricat is constantly monitoring where the llamas are and what they seem to be planning. If we are on the other side of a fence and Pampe approaches it a bit too slyly, Merricat will jump to her feet, ready to flee (and I will toss one of my anti-Pampe sticks, and say NON.)

Merricat and I are a very good team! We've foiled several of Pampe's plots, but we need to be on the road for Merricat to remain wary (if we were in the pen Pampe's escape attempts would involve getting away from us and the cat wouldn't care.) Cars are rare so it's okay (plus it's so quiet you can always hear them coming), and on the few occasions when someone showed up and asked why I was having apéritif on the road, I pointed at Pampe and they were like, "Ah! Didn't see her here. Good luck!"

"Hedgehog-moss, you're exaggerating. Pampe can't be that—"

She is! She is. And she always seems to notice when Merricat is on a bathroom break and I'm absorbed in a book.

There was one evening though, when she got distracted by a fascinating new idea. I don't claim to know what's going on in this llama's head (except when she's looking at a fence, then it's easy) but as you can see, once I brought the animals to the barn Poldine started eating flowers, Pirlouit started eating grass, and Pampe started eating the wall.

After a moment she slowly circled the barn, then stopped and lay down right next to it, settling down in a comfortable position but with focused ears and her head still turned towards the wall. It was suspicious behaviour, but on the other hand she now looked so uninterested in the road that I decided to take a risk and run home to bring back some dinner—and she didn't move while I was away! I even brought Pandolf, who is usually banned from these soirées because he would disturb my Merricat alarm system. He was happy to be finally included.

It's unclear if Pampe was eating the wall, talking to the wall, or carefully examining various parts of the wall as Step 1 of 27 of a complex plan only she understands, but she stuck close to the barn all evening instead of lying in wait by the fence so I was able to have a picnic in the grass rather than on the road, which felt more bucolic. I know that "Pampérigouste has a new, mysterious project" is a worrying sentence but at this early stage (feasibility study) it felt to me and Merricat like a little holiday!

[tender-rosiey]

The sukuna with a shy daughter was sooo good. I loved it! Can we have more of them where its just sukuna and his baby girl in different situations and theres a lot of people and he has to deal with his brat?

peasant food — ryomen sukuna x f!reader

a/n: i am a big fan of sukuna with a shy daughter so i am super glad you like it too

right now, you’re standing beside your dear husband sukuna who stands with his arms crossed, watching with a frown as your daughter hands out food to the poor.

you almost let out a giggle, but then you feel his hand squeeze your hip in warning.

you huff in protest; however, he doesn’t let you dwell on it for long, as he hands you a necklace he just…acquired from somebody.

your little girl, on the other hand, with her wide eyes and gentle smile, kneels by a villager, offering him a bowl of rice.

“here you go,” she says sweetly, her tiny voice almost drowned out by the village noise. “you must be hungry.”

sukuna’s brow twitches as he clenches his jaw. “what in the hell are you doing?” his deep voice rumbles, earning a few fearful glances from nearby villagers. they recognize him, of course. the king of curses himself.

nobody dares to approach.

d/n looks up, flustered by her father’s glare. “I’m giving them food, papa. they’re hungry,” she answers, trying to keep eye contact, but she gives up half-way through and looks away.

sukuna’s eye twitches. “you’re supposed to cause pain,” he growls, leaning down with his arms crossed, looming over her tiny form. “not make people happy.”

you stifle a chuckle, placing a gentle hand on sukuna’s arm. “she’s just being kind,” you murmur, amused by his growing frustration.

sukuna throws you an incredulous look before turning back to his daughter. “kind? they don’t need kindness. they need fear, suffering. let them be hungry.”

“but… papa, that’s mean,” she protests, her little face scrunching up, and her lips wobble a bit. “they’re sad because they’re hungry. don’t you want them to be happy?”

sukuna steps back, his face twisting in disgust. “no. I don’t want them to be happy,” he replies right away. the coldness in his tone is enough for the nearby villagers to flinch.

you shake your head, eyes flitting and watching some of the villagers finally scramble away.

he looks at you with a small click of his tongue. your daughter, however, just looks up at him with innocent eyes, blinking slowly like she doesn’t understand why he’s so upset.

“b-but I like it when people smile,” she insists softly, handing another bowl of rice to a small child who hesitantly approaches. “it feels… nice.”

sukuna groans, running a hand down his face in sheer exasperation. “you’re supposed to be a curse, not some…do-gooder.”

he looks at you as with a quick side-eye.

“I think it’s sweet,” you say, shrugging lightly. “she’s got your stubbornness, you know.”

sukuna glares at you, then back at his daughter, who continues to hand out food, humming happily.

“I can’t believe this,” he mutters, watching her with narrowed eyes. “you’re lucky you’re my daughter,” he grumbles under his breath, crossing his arms again.

your daughter stands up after giving away the last of the food, her face glowing prideful but still timid, as she tries to convince her father with her point of view. “see, papa? they’re happy now.”

“you’re impossible,” he grunts, reaching down to ruffle her hair, though he tries to hide the fondness in his movements. the sharpness of his look returns a little as he says, “this doesn’t mean I approve.”

your daughter nods cautiously, before fidgeting with her fingers. ultimately, she decides on something. “do you want some rice, papa?” she asks softly, holding up an empty bowl.

sukuna scoffs, rolling his eyes. “I don’t eat peasant food.” he straightens up, glaring at the remaining villagers who are brave enough to linger nearby.

with just one look, they scatter, leaving the streets eerily quiet.

“but it’s nice!” your daughter insists, her voice earnest as she pouts slightly, her cheeks puffing out in frustration. “please, papa?”

you can’t help but chuckle at the sight of her trying to negotiate with him, and you lean in closer, nudging sukuna with your shoulder. “maybe just a taste? for her sake? please, honey.”

sukuna’s brows furrow in thought, and he glances between you and your daughter, who is practically bouncing on her toes with hope.

he crosses his arms again, acting indifferent. “fine. just a small bite. but I’m not doing this because I want to. understand?”

“okay!” your daughter replies, earnestly, her face lighting up as she dashes to a nearby vendor who is still watching with cautious interest.

sukuna watches her go, shaking his head. “unbelievable,” he mutters, but there’s no real anger in his voice now. it’s more of a begrudging acceptance.

“who would’ve thought you’d have such a kind-hearted little girl?” you tease, wrapping an arm around his waist.

“she’s a curse’s daughter, not a saint,” he replies, but there’s a softness in his tone that you recognize.

his gaze follows your daughter, who is now engaged in a small conversation with the vendor about the best rice. “she should be causing chaos, not handing out food like some charity.”

you laugh lightly, leaning your head against his shoulder. “maybe this is her form of chaos. besides, look how happy she is.”

sukuna’s expression shifts, and you can see the conflicting emotions playing out on his face. he wants to be frustrated, to be the fearsome king of curses that everyone knows him as, yet here he is, watching his daughter bring joy to others.

your daughter returns, bowl in hand, and holds it up proudly. “here, papa! just a taste!”

he takes the bowl and raises it to his lips, taking a small, measured taste of the rice.

“well?” your daughter prompts, her eyes wide with anticipation.

he chews slowly, contemplating the flavor as if he’s analyzing a potent curse. you can see the wheels turning in his mind, weighing the taste against his own expectations.

“it’s... not terrible,” he finally admits, and your daughter squeals with delight, jumping up and down.

“see? I told you!” she exclaims, surprising sukuna as it is the first time he has seen her so excited. “it’s good, isn’t it?”

sukuna shoots you a look that says he’s still not convinced, but the corner of his mouth lifts slightly, revealing a hint of amusement. “you’ve successfully managed to corrupt my child,” he mutters to you.

“awesome,” you grin, “do I get a reward for being able to corrupt like you do, my husband?”

he rolls his eyes then presses a firm—borderline aggressive—kiss to the top of your head. you pull away and frown, “you tryna squish my head or something?”

“you ask for affection, but can’t handle it?” he tilts his head, a slight smirk on his unfairly handsome face.

“🤏🤏🤏🤏🤏”

“huh?”

“mama, how did you speak in drawings?”

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[uniquexusposts]

Little surprise - C. Leclerc

Summary: Y/n is pregnant and meets her husband Charles at the track as a surprise.

Y/n turned off the tv and got up from the sofa. She was satisfied with the results from her husband, Charles Leclerc. Monaco was one of his favourite circuits, mainly because it was his home Grand Prix, but faith didn't agree with those previous years. It's sad to say he had never finished the Monaco Grand Prix before. However, this weekend seemed to be good.

"Are we going to see daddy?" Y/d/n asked and looked hopeful at her mum. The three-year-old had been waiting to walk down the streets to see her dad. It was a weird situation for Y/d/n; her dad was never home at a race weekend, but this weekend he was.

Y/n smiled and nodded. "Shall we go then?" Y/d/n heavily nodded. "Go put on your shoes, love."

Y/d/n crawled off the sofa and ran to the hallway to grab her shoes. It made Y/n happy to see her daughter excited. You would say: 'you live in Monaco, there's a race, why not visit it?' Well, it sounded easier than it looked. Y/n was pregnant with her second child, which was the best thing that ever happened to her - and to Charles, but she struggled a lot with sicknesses. It made it challenging to show up at races; it was uncomfortable.

"Mummy, can I bring Raf and Peter?" Y/d/n walked back to the living area with her two favourite stuffed animals; she held the giraffe and rabbit up in the air.

"Are you sure you want to bring them both?" Y/n asked and packed her bag. "Are you sure you won't lose them again?"

"No."

It happened one time before Y/d/n lost Raf and Peter. They were relaxing at the Ferrari facility, but the trouble and drama it caused... Y/n and Charles preferred not to be in that situation again.

"Sure, but they are your responsibility now." Y/n softly smirked; she knew Y/d/n would leave them somewhere around anyway. "Are you ready?"

The little girl started to jump and happily giggled. Y/d/n was a daddy's girl, so there was nothing more exciting than going to see your dad. She had been watching the third free practice all morning - well, the parts with Charles. Obviously, Y/d/n was too young to understand what Formula 1 was, but seeing her dad and his friends was all she needed to enjoy herself.

"Raf and Peter are happy to see daddy too," Y/d/n said and looked at her teddies when she stepped in the lift. "Can I press the button?" She looked up, and her arm reached for the button. Y/d/n grew a few centimetres by standing on her tiptoes.

"You are getting tall, sweetheart," Y/n proudly smiled. "I think daddy is happy to see Raf and Peter too.” She stroked her daughter’s hair.

She quickly looked in the mirror; it was the first time in days Y/n dressed up. She was wearing a maxi dress. It covered up her 20-weeks bump, but it showed she was carrying a tiny human. As shoes, she picked Birkenstocks, just for the comfiness. Her hair was curly, and her makeup was minimal. At first, she doubted what to wear. As a wife of a driver, people expect you to look stunning and stylish all the time. Over the years, it became less for Y/n, but it was still bothering her in some ways.

"Give me your hand," Y/n instructed Y/d/n. As soon as they left the apartment building, they stepped into the busy world of racing. Every spot in Monaco was busy and chaotic due to the race weekend.

Y/d/n grabbed her mum's hand, but quickly let it go. "Can Raf sleep in your bag?"

A soft smirk rolled over Y/n's lips; there you had it. "Of course, love." Y/n opened her bag and lowered it for her daughter. "Sweet dreams, Raf."

Y/d/n gave Raf a kiss. "Sleepy sleepy, Raf," and carefully put Raf in the bag. "Are we going to see uncle Pierre too?" She grabbed her mum's hand again, and they started to walk towards the entrance of the track.

"I don't know, love. Maybe we will see him, or uncle Carlos. We will look for them, yeh? But first, we need to find daddy."

"Yes, we need to find daddy first."

Once Y/n and Y/d/n arrived at the track, they scanned their passes. Y/d/n excitedly imitated the check-in sound of the gates and walked on the stairs. Y/n followed the small girl, also trying to find out where Charles possibly could be. They crossed the track and entered the paddock/pit lane area.

"I see daddy!" Y/d/n cheered and started to run away.

Before Y/n could stop Y/d/n from running, it was already too late. Y/n looked up and noticed Charles was still in an interview in front of his garage. She pressed her lips into a tin line and followed her daughter to her husband; this escalated...

"Daddy!"

Charles recognised the high voice, but he assumed this couldn't be his daughter since she wouldn't be here today. He continued talking to the reporter, but squeezed his eyebrows together when he heard the voice again. Charles looked behind the reporter and cameraman, and a small girl was running towards him. It was Y/d/n.

"Daddy," Y/d/n breathed and raised her arms up in the air.

"Bonjour, mon amour," he greeted and lifted her up from the ground. "What are you doing here?"

Y/d/n smiled. "I wanted to see you," she giggled. "Mummy is here too!" She pointed at a woman who was walking towards them as well.

Charles' face softened; he really didn't expect to see his wife at this Grand Prix due to the heavy sickness. It was a real surprise. "That is a surprise," he chuckled and looked back at Y/d/n before looking back at the reporter. "I'm sorry," he mentioned and politely smiled. "Thank you," he ended the interview and gave the reporter a nod. Charles stepped away and walked towards Y/n. "Hey," he said, surprised. "You here as well?" A teasing smile grew on his face.

"What a coincidence," Y/n cheekily said.

"I really didn't expect you to be here," Charles honestly said. At first, he was disappointed when he and Y/n decided she would attend the race, but safety and health first.

Y/n smiled. "That is kinda the point of a surprise," she said. "I'm feeling good, and Y/d/n wanted to see you. So if you don't mind, we are gonna watch the qualification here?"

Charles couldn't be happier; this really made his weekend better. "Of course." He looked at Y/d/n, who was hugging him like she hadn't seen him in a while - they saw each other this morning before Charles left to prep for the day. "I'm really surprised. It's good to see you, babe," he said and gave her a kiss. "You look beautiful," he whispered in her ear.

"Thanks..." She shyly smiled. "You had a great morning. It's too early to say it, and I hope I won't jinx anything, but it seems like a good weekend."

"Please, don't cheer too soon," he replied and looked painfully at his wife. "We have said this for years, and it just... escalates every time."

"Maybe it won't this time."

They started to walk towards the Ferrari hospitality. "My weekend is already amazing because you all are here. How is the baby?"

Y/d/n laid her head on Charles' shoulder and looked around her. It wasn't all new to her, but it surely was overwhelming. Her eyes fell on someone who was waving at her; it was Pierre Gasly. Y/d/n looked up and happily waved back at Pierre.

"Good, she's calm now, and the sickness is gone." That was something huge; this was the first time in the pregnancy this happened.

Charles proudly smiled. "That's good. If you don't feel good or need anything, you will let me know, okay?"

"I will, don't worry, Charles."

It was the second time Y/n showed up at a Grand Prix during her second pregnancy. People adored the young family; they were happy to see the family together. And to see the baby bump. 

Taglist: @itsjustkhaos@crashingwavesofeuphoria@maryvibess @chocolatefartstrawberry @snzleclerc @ironmaiden1313@blodwyn4u

[lostingrayrain]

hello hello!! i bought homicipher the day it came out and i'm so in love with it.. but there's no content whatsoever and i'm so sad 😭😭 could you write literally anything for any character.. i just need to see more homicipher content!!! 😭😭💗

I GOT YOU ANON I've clocked in like 20 hours since the release on November 1st omg....

I've been cooking up something for my first Homicipher post.....here's some general thoughts on the relationships/dynamics with the main guys.

Characters: Mr. Crawling, Mr. Silver Hair / Mr. Silvair, Mr. Gap, Mr. Hood, Mr. Machete, Mr. Scarletella

Word Count: 1454

Warnings: sfw, some mentions of canon-typical violence

Mr. Crawling

He loves you!! He loves you so, so, so much!!!

Do you love him?

He asks you that. A lot. He loves to be reassured that you adore him. And he's always vocal about how much he adores you.

He follows you everywhere, like a lost puppy. It's honestly so endearing and sweet. He's constantly on the lookout for you.

He also adores physical touch, once he knows it's fine. Other than the little headpats, he likes to touch your legs, especially your calves. In times of rest he's incredibly cuddly and loves to nuzzle into you.

Pet his hair and he'll melt immediately. It's so relaxing to him.

He's usually with you, but when he's not he's often on the lookout for gifts and trophies to bring to you. He just wants to make you happy, in any way possible. The second there's anything you mention liking or being fond of, it's a priority for him to see if he can scrounge it up.

If you'll let him, he'd love to touch your hair. He will play with it and make silly nonsensical braids and giggle quietly to himself all the while.

He's a bit of a chatterbox. He loves to talk to you. Any time he's been away he likes to give you little reports of what he's done or what he's seen. And he wants to hear all about your day or your dreams, too. There's never a time he won't want to hear what you have to say.

Mr. Silver Hair / Mr. Silvair

You are so very interesting to him! He wants to study you.

But not hurt you. Normally, he probably would have already dismembered you to watch how your body pulls together again, but since you're friends with Mr. Chopped, he's put aside that urge.

Instead it's been replaced by something else, though he doesn't really understand what it is. He's never felt it before. Or maybe he has? Maybe he doesn't remember? Could you help him remember?

Whenever you’re feeling ill, he finds that he wants to make you feel better. He’s trying hard to learn how to keep you together just as you are.

He’ll get you to lie down when it seems you’re feeling faint, and carry you to bed when you collapse in the middle of an errand. Before he realises it, he's massaging your hair. Think nothing of it. Your head hurts, right? So it makes sense to pet you.

He likes to watch you sleep. He can’t put a finger on why. He likes to tell himself he’s doing armchair research when he’s really just….zoning out.

He's extremely perceptive and observant. He's always checking your reactions to things and events to figure out what you like or don't like, or to try to understand how you're feeling in the moment.

He's the type to politely ask if it's okay to touch you before doing so.

He would never hurt you unless your urges became unbearable, in which case it's self-defense, right? He'll make sure you'll turn back to normal and he'll be there for you every step of the way.

Mr. Gap

He's probably...one of the strangest denizens of the otherworld. You're still not sure if he has a body. But he has helped you on multiple occasions. You've found yourself growing fond of him.

You often see him peeking at you from various holes and gaps. Sometimes he tries to get your attention, sometimes he doesn't. Sometimes he just watches.

When you find a bag in the underworld, you begin carrying it around with you.

He's usually inside, but sometimes not. You have no idea where he goes.

He'll often bring back little gifts like weapons or food, like some bizarre cat. When he finds out you like candy, he tends to focus on that.

He always asks for your heart before he gives you anything, and you always say no, and he always grumbles.

But somehow you'll always find those same things coincidentally in your path or somewhere in the room after you wake up, if you've taken a nap.

He likes to scope out newspapers and magazines too, and show them to you, especially if they feature himself. He's so proud of that.

Over time, his requests for your heart grow less and less frequent. Sometimes, you forget he used to ask you for it at all, until he suddenly pipes up with the query again.

Is his wanting your heart the same thing as wanting your love? Things to ponder.

Mr. Hood

He's quiet and reclusive but he's there for you whenever you need him.

You need or want anything? Just ask. He'll give it to you immediately with hardly a question.

No harm will ever come to you whenever you're with him, and he hardly lets you out of his sight. He's incredibly protective of you.

He loves to carry you in his arms or on his shoulder, whether you're small or not. It's no bother to him. He's more than strong enough.

Hand touches are so pleasant to him -- whether you're touching his hands, or he's touching your face. He's secretly touch-starved. As long as you don't shy away, he'll continue to hold onto you.

He enjoys quizzing you on your knowledge of the otherworld language. When things are slow, he’ll randomly ask you if you know the names of certain things.

Whenever you both encounter something new during your travels, he’s quick to ask you if you know what it is or outright tells you what it’s called.

He seems a bit self-conscious of having minimal form. What is under his robe? If you don't ask he'll be grateful. He doesn't know himself.

But if you're not repulsed by his anomalous form, that's just -- incredibly touching.

He claims to not understand love, but he'll never abandon you.

Maybe he doesn't understand. Maybe he's forgotten.

But there's something about you that comforts him, and makes him feel safe. Quite paradoxical -- he's the one doing the protecting, after all. But your presence soothes him.

Mr. Machete

He's just looking for a way to not be bored. And being with you -- somehow, it's fun.

Maybe because he's usually alone, so he doesn't often have anyone else to talk to. It's...fun to banter with you, even if sometimes your words confuse him.

It's unquestionable that he's the brawn, you're the brain of this duo. Maybe the beauty and the beast, too?

He's always, secretly, been a little bit of a coward. The second things don't look like they'll turn out well for him, he ditches and flees.

But, oddly, you give him the courage to stand against things or monsters he would have thought were impossible to defeat.

Sometimes, you die -- whether by accident or because something else got to you before he could. But he always sighs and waits for you to wake up again. If you're mad, it's a little funny. You were just too slow that time.

He likes sparring with you. You have to get faster, right? Your weapon is pretty funny, too. So small and yet somehow you manage to not get overwhelmed by him. He's not holding back. He never would. Right?

He likes to pick you up and sling you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Likes to hug you like a teddy bear, too. You're soft and warm. You feel nice against him.

He's not the type to ask, but if you made any indication of not liking anything, he'd stop. He doesn't want to break you.

Mr. Scarletella

You are his queen. He literally worships the ground you walk on.

You are so fascinating to him. He just can't believe he's found someone as perfect as you. Someone who likes to destroy and kill people, just like him? Immaculate.

You haven't and never will give him your name. That's fine. He can live with that, as long as you're with him.

You've likely given him something else to call you. It's not quite your name -- maybe it's not your full name, and he knows it, because he can't quite grasp your essence. But it's enough to be able to give a sound to the person -- thing -- he likes most in this world.

He likes to say that not-quite name, and he says it often, just to get your attention.

He's fascinated by everything about you -- including how small you are in comparison to him. He loves that he can easily dwarf your form and loom over you. It's exhilarating in a completely different way from mindless violence.

Speaking of which, his favourite thing is without a doubt to commit violence with you. There's a new urban legend steadily growing in the human world, of a pair of murderers characterised by their red and white umbrellas. You're the perfect perfectly awful duo, truly.

Even when he's not with you, he's always somehow got an eye on you. Most of the otherworld residents know by now who you belong to, and they'd never lay hand on the one cherished by the red umbrella man.

[loaksbitch]

blame tumblr for deleting my draft and make me rework this with rush— now girlies, imagine jealous neteyam pull you to his side, claiming you as his yes? this is the long awaited update (pt 3) of the i trusted you series.

warnings - hard angst, vulgar language, jealous neteyam i repeat, JEALOUSY NETEYAM! ugh, cussing, neteyam is tired of hurting and trying, kiri is best girl for boosting up neteyam to make a step kinda? that’s it for now!

likes and reblogs are appreciated for the final part! i love each and every one of you babies mwah!! — 3.2k wc and poor-ish grammar

“i want to trust you.” — neteyam sully (★,꩜)

here’s part (one) – (two) — (four) of this series

neteyam’s state wasn’t good when he went back home.

you’re leaving the clan because of him, you’re leaving your home, your childhood, your everything because of him.

you’re leaving him because of him.

still not accepting the words you’ve said to him, he hadn’t noticed his younger sister waiting for him right when he got back to the village, hunting long forgotten.

kiri on other hand had enough, she’s tired of seeing her brother suffer for what he was trying to make right, especially after that night. the night she saw her perfect brother kneel in front of a female na��vi begging you not to go.

“neteyam,” his name being called, pulls him out from his thoughts and his tired eyes land on his sister who has her arms crossed against her chest. “what part of leave me alone don’t they understand?” neteyam silently says under his breath

“you know i can hear you right?” kiri scoffs

“what part of i want to be alone don’t you all understand?” this time he says it clearly and louder. neteyam doesn’t give her time before walking past her and if only if it wasn't for her next words? he wouldn’t have frozen at his spot.

“if you love her, go for her.”

there she goes again, now he needs to tell her he doesn’t want to hear anything about that future mate of his, that female na’vi he doesn’t even want.

“kiri.” he starts to turn and face her, his amber eyes swollen and puffy it makes her sad. “i’ll say this for the last time, i don’t want anyone to bring äy—“

“i’m not talking about äyea and you know it.”

his heart dropped, amber eyes slightly widening like he was caught. neteyam searches for more explanation from his sister, kiri softly smiles and he definitely knows who she’s talking about

“y/n, neteyam, i’m talking about y/n.” his skin itches at your name being called and he walks fast to his sister before grabbing her by her arms. nobody has to know, not like this and he won't risk to lose you like this

“look, you can’t tell no one, okay?” he’s shaking his sister so hard that her shoulders are hurting. “i can't lose her, if the clan knows they’ll take her away from me.” his body is trembling, neteyam’s mind was too occupied with the worst scenarios that would happen if they find out about you just like this.

kiri closes her eyes and calms herself before trying to do the same for her brother. “nete, calm down” she places her small hands on his cheek. “you’ve to calm down, for her?” she knew you’re his weakness and he would do anything with your name

“i won’t tell anyone.” kiri watches neteyam’s eyes blink, confused and processing her words, “but you must tell them, everyone, tell everyone neteyam.”

he’s slowly sliding his hands down her arms and letting her go, what is she saying?

“i saw everything, the night she knew about it and how you were.” kiri didn’t want to look like she sneaked into someone's business. “i’ve never seen you so weak like this brother, you’re giving up something that makes you happy.”

where is this going? why is she not yelling at him that he failed to be perfect?

“i know you’re soon to be mated but why when you’re not happy? not wanting it, not in love.” neteyam takes every word of hers carefully. “if this is the future you want with her then make a progress.”

“i’m tired of hearing you cry yourself to sleep, starve yourself and worry mom and dad.” he felt like a child. “i’m sorry,” he murmurs and kiri sighs, “you don’t have to apologize for everything.”

neteyam was feeling his heartbeats quickening at his younger sister's words but it’s also painful when he remembers he can’t do that cause you’re gonna be gone, soon… very soon.

“she’s le-leaving,” his words are cut when his voice quivers, kiri gasps at the news. “she said she feels like she doesn’t belong here.” he’s now looking down to avoid kiri’s eyes or he’ll cry

“she’s leaving me, kiri” his sister only pulls him close to hug him and he drops his body on her, head on her shoulder. “i love her and she’s leaving, i’m losing her.” he wants the pain to end, he’s tired of hurting

“oh brother.” kiri pats his head, even though neteyam was the smartest and perfect to hide his emotions, this was too much. he’s literally crumbling down. “it’ll be okay, everything will be okay.”

“it will be okay, everything will be okay.” your mother pats your hair when you lean on her shoulders and cry. all you do is cry, you feel bad.

you’re debating on leaving everything behind and running to your neteyam but then again there’s his future mate being a wall to your love. “it’ll be over soon when we leave.”

if not soulmates why bound to fall in love and hurt?

eywa was not fair, she’s not fair with her doings and you don’t want it. you want him, you want your man, you want neteyam, you miss him so bad.

the ritual is in two days and you’re not ready to watch them or give them your blessing as a part of a clan. once the ceremony is done you know they’ll go home, you don’t even want to think what they’ll do after that.

they’ll have a fruit of love, a baby in the future… what about you? supposed to move on? no, you can’t do that.

“we’ve got to get ready, my sweet child,” your mother says as she eyes the hammock that sheltered you for years. everything is packed, ready and done.

while you’re struggling to make the pain hurt less, neteyam is struggling to make his heart beat less.

it’s now an eclipse and everyone is ready for dinner, “mom! what’s for dinner?” tuk whines when netyiri brings the bowls and trays at the wooden table. “you’ll see baby” she kneels down to finally join her family.

it doesn’t fail to catch her by surprise when her first born is sat across the right side of the table. “neteyam?” her eyes start to whelm when her son smiles at her, oh how she missed having him around the table to eat with them.

“he’s here just like you want him.” jake says and neteyam nods.

neytiri only lets soft laugh out and places a bowl for him. “eat this, it’ll help you get strength for your training.” she motions him to take his food.

kiri silently watches everyone, a smile painting her lips as she sips on her soup.

“tastes good?” neteyam nervously nods, the only thing he’s thinking is a way to bring up his love topic to them. it wasn’t much late before he’s opening his mouth to speak and lo’ak suddenly interrupted

“dad, mom i ne–…”

“tuk stop doing that, you’ll choke.” lo’ak scolds at his sister and neteyam shuts his lips quick. maybe it’s the right thing not to say anything right now.

“tuk, listen to your brother honey” jake says and turns to neteyam, “what were you saying son?”

neteyam shakes his head, “never mind i’ll talk to you guys later.” he doesn’t ignore how kiri lightly groans when he backs out. “i’ll head inside now.” he rubs his sweaty hands on his thighs and gets back to his feet

“you didn’t even touch your food.” now that’s a lie, he actually scooped two times and ate.

“i ate mom, it’s delicious t-thanks.” he hates when the last word breaks. on eywa he’s so nervous.

kiri was quick to follow his steps when he left and luckily her parents didn't question. she was fast to catch up with her brother and yanks his arms to make him face her, “what was that?” she raises her eyebrows

“what was what?”

“don’t play dumb with me right now.” kiri warns and neteyam clears his throat

“i’m scared okay!” he hissed, “i’m so fucking nervous my skin is crawling to leave my bones.” his sister only rolls her eye, “seriously— we’ve talked about this! not being a little scared ass to be telling them.”

“what happened to that?” she crosses her arms.

“kiri,” he sighs and drops his head down, shoulders easing. “you don’t understand how dangerous this is, what if–��

“what if they hurt her?”

neteyam was awfully silent and that answers her question. “you know mom and dad, they don’t do anything about what you care and love…” kiri slowly stops when neteyam shakes his head

“not them,” it’s not them he’s scared of, it’s äyea’s parents he’s scared of, he knows they would do anything to make their little perfect daughter that matches with him, or whatever they say.

kiri presses her lips to a straight line before clicking her tongue.

this is gonna be a bad idea or the best idea she has ever made and decided to tell him aways. neteyam’s eyes widen when his sister pulls him away from their family, what she’s gonna tell him is the only chance to get you back and win your trust and she’s sure neteyam will do it,

do anything for you.

೫ time skip — mating ritual ceremony

your new outfit makes your curves more defined, way more defined than your usual loin clothes that you wear.

your skin shining smoothly, the leaves barely covering your breast, you looked ethereal with your hair not braided and freely displayed all over your shoulders

“honey, are you ready?”

your mother’s words make you gulp and suck a deep breath. “we must be there early to leave early!” she tells while being in the other room.

you finally check yourself and talk back, “yeah, i’m ready.” you whisper morley to yourself? swallowing the lump on your throat.

“yeah, i’m ready.” neteyam closes his eyes and breaths trying to focus on not messing up everything, he’s not even sure if you’ll show up and some part of him wishes you do show up

extra loincloths and decorations on his body makes him uncomfortable with its weight crushing him down.

netyiri proudly looks at her son’s figure while the kids are outside, “mother.” the sudden call of her name, netyiri answers quickly. “what is it? nervous?”

neteyam gulps down his fear and walks to her, “i love you” netyiri feels her eyes tear up and smile at him, “your mom loves you too, baby.” neteyam envelopes her with a hug and netyiri cries to his shoulder telling him how he’s grown up

“now don’t mess my face up with tears! let’s get you ready there.” it’s time to face reality and wait for his soon to be mate come

when he’s out of his hammock, he’s greeted with his family smiling at him and jake’s proud smile. even half of the clan was standing at his hammock.

“neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan” everyone chants and neteyam feels his inside clench in discomfort. he doesn’t want this if it’s not with you, everything makes him sick. “c’mon son, let’s get you to the trees of voice, your mate is waiting.”

what the fuck, that was what neteyam said inside his head. what does his father mean when he’s gonna meet his mate under the trees of voice? it was all about you and him, neteyam would never mate with some random girl he is set up with in a place with memories filled with yours

neteyam turns to his sister and kiri has the same expression because what is this bullshit?

“nete’ she’s waiting for you.” his mother placed her hand on his back. no, no, no— his own feet are betraying him when he realize he’s walking and the clan opens way for him straight long line created till where he’s supposed to see äyea

you on other hand stand in line with the people and pray under your breath for eywa to give you a strength not to cry or make a scene, especially when they will be bound where you thought you and neteyam would have been

it doesn’t take long when starts to cheer as the future Olo'eyktan starts to get closer and closer.

lo’ak was the first one you saw from the sully families while he’s holding tuk close to him so she won’t get lost in the crowed. “Aeyaeyaeyaeyaye!” the clan yells

neteyam’s eyes keep searching for specific someone which is you, eyes desperately looking for you and feeling more scared and anxious when he can’t figure out your face from the crowd he takes a deep breath

you finally take his figure to your sight and god he was so beautiful.

your breath hitches at his appearance, the dangling material on his forehead making him look more attractive than he already is, you realize it’s so hard to let go of him.

you suck a deep breath when his eyes lands at yours and neteyam halts his pace, confusing everyone for a second. your tears are fast to blur your vision and you blink before looking away from him

his heart cracks when you do look away, you don’t want to see him and he understands

once neteyam passed you, the crowd surrounds him and cheers when he stepped close to where äyea is found.

you hate how your mother looks at you sympathetically while her hands grip yours tighter, “it’ll be over soon” she whispers to you but you shrug her off, only watching things unfold in front of you as your heart breaks

“it will be over soon.” neteyam says to himself

it’s sickening how everyone can’t notice this is not supposedly to happen, kiri’s plan better work or he’ll seriously fuck this ritual up and run away with you.

“son.” äyea’s father greets him and neteyam, bringing his hand to his forehead. “ty’mar, i see you.” he then turns to his soon to be mate’s mother and repeat his actions.

the way äyea was smiling makes your throat hurt from desperately wanting to cry.

‘no, don’t tell her you see her neteyam. please. please.’

äyea softly giggles when neteyam stands in front of her and blush, “neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan” the way she tries to voice out his name makes neteyam feel sick.

“i see you.” she says but neteyam doesn’t bother to say it back making her smile slightly fall.

netyiri also notices how neteyam is acting, what would possibly be bothering him? definitely not everything.

after everyone was introduced to each other, the ceremony began. drinks were served, everyone clapping and dancing to the songs the na’vi’s are singing.

you’re a little far away from the crowd to breath clear air and dry your tears that constantly burn your eyes. your eyes are on neteyam who isn’t enjoy one bit of the ceremony while his soon to be mate squirms and waves her hands up

both of them are sitting on a throne-like wooden chair, both of their parents beside them just say like them.

this is so depressing how awkward and uncomfortable it looks and actually is. you think, brining the drink to your mouth

you didn’t notice the na’vi male sneaking behind you that actually has been staring at you since you joined the crowd in line. “enjoying the party from far doesn’t seem too boring after all.”

you’re now jumping in fear when a breath hits the back of your ear.

“mother eyaw! who the fu–” you scream and stumble in panic, but before you’re falling you feel strong arms hold you on your ground. “shit, I should've announced i came, i’m sorry.”

you’re about to tell him it’s okay and leave when he’s offering his hand for a shake.

“i’m no’xus, by the way.” great, now you’re stuck talking with someone.

“y/n.” you say and turn over to place your drink on the talk flat table looking object, it’s obvious you’re ignoring him and uninterested but he keeps talking

“why’re you not dancing?” the tall na’vi asks and you face him before speaking, “because i don’t want to?” you just want this over and privacy, how hard can it get to understand!?

“mhm,” the male hums, “wanna dance with me?” at his offer, you scoff mentally and realize you’re not getting him away from you soon– before you reject him, a strong glare radiating from far makes your body tingle

it was neteyam, sending glares to the male who was next to you while sitting far away.

you didn’t bother it at first but the way neteyam’s face twists makes your brow raise. why is he bothered? jealous? if no’xus had not cleared his throat, you would’ve forgotten about what he just said.

“look notoxo, i really don’t feel like…” you watch him awkwardly chuckle and correct you.

“it’s no’xus not notoxo.”

“you know what? fuck it, let’s dance.” you’re pulling him to the crowd, maybe it’s the drink or maybe it’s him, it’s neteyam making you do this.

your mother was long gone to where you don’t know, no’xus was just a bonus to get your frustration out and you’re now dancing with him. too occupied to bother, you haven’t noticed how neteyam’s nose are flaring in anger

neteyam watches how you’re dancing and it’s very obvious it’s targeted to get him out of his mind

he is not even listening to äeya and brought himself up from his throne-like seat. rage and anger is in him, this needs to fucking stop or he’ll rip the male’s hand that’s holding you by your waist and moving you sides to side

all of his fear gone when the na’vi’s eyes are on him when he’s stepping down from his seat and walking straight to you

neteyam ignores his father’s call, sight on you and you only. you didn’t notice how he’s dangerously close until no’xus stopped his moving. “what is it?” you’re annoyed when your distracted self is brought back to reality

“put your hands off of her.” it was an order and no’xus looked at him manically. “i’m not fucking repeating myself.” all the na’vi’s are confused, even his parents and äeya’s family.

your body is jerked away from the stranger you just met and you hiss when neteyam tugs you close to him. what is he thinking? in front of everyone? his last words makes the whole omatikaya village gasp and whisper.

“fucking let go of what’s mine and find your own mate.” neteyam scowl’s dangerously.

how’re we feeling, sweets? are we feeling anxious? excited? invested? spill in the comments cause i love reading your thoughts sjsjsj

also do you guys want a toe curling smut at the end or no? since neteyam is aged up!20 years old in this series, lmk in the comments if you want smut — tag list in the comments &lt;3

[rosenclaws]

Worst!Logan x Angel!Fem!Reader where the reader comforts Logan at the most random of times. Whether he may be at his worst, or at his best, he still appreciates the gesture, because the reader being the angel mutant she is, she can’t help but be there for him, as he radiates energy that feeds off sadness and guilt? I’d appreciate it,, but if not that’s alright!!

what you deserve || Worst!Logan x Angel!reader

warnings: logan not accepting his feelings as usual, a little angst, fluffy ending

a/n: thank you sm for requesting this! I had a blast writing it and I love the idea of angel!reader who just dotes and loves Logan he deserves it.

The first thing Logan had to get used to in this new world was his loud mouth, annoying, and very punchable roommate. The second thing he had to get used to was his next door neighbor who might be the kindest woman he's ever met. You have to be if you're friends with Wade.

You literally brightened a room by stepping in it.

The first time you came to dinner he felt a change in the air, it confused him at first. Until you took off your coat and your bright white wings were on display. They were hugged tightly against your back but he could still see them. He was mesmerized by them.

They looked so soft. He would watch you from the corner of the apartment, lifting peoples spirits with a simple conversation. He didn't expect you to even look his direction, why would you? You're an angel and he's...well he's wolverine. A grumpy, feral drunk with no light left to give.

"Hi Logan," He looks up to see you standing in front of him, holding out another beer for him. He looks down to see that his bottle was empty, he hadn't even noticed.

"Hi." He says shortly as he takes the new bottle. Silence falls between the two of you as Logan racks his brain for anything to say.

"You mind if I stay here?" You ask. He shrugs his shoulders and takes a sip of his drink.

"M'not great company." He's not the life of the party kind of guy, if anything he's the one to bring down the party. A raincloud slowly casting its shadow over the room.

"That's okay, I just want to be here." And you do. You sit with him for the rest of the party.

Only making small comments here and there that make Logan laugh, or he makes a noise that sounds like amusement so you'll take it. It's weird to Logan, why would you ever want to just sit quietly next to him of all people. But it's oddly comforting. Sometimes your hands would brush and he could feel a spark shoot through him. The party carries on but the two of you remain, and Logan likes it that way.

After that day you just kept popping up in his life. Always making an effort to be kind to him which he just couldn't understand. Doing nice things for him, complimenting him, for fucks sake you would bring him breakfast almost every morning.

It was unbearable how nice you were to him and yet he never wanted it to stop. He loved every damn minute of it whether he would admit it or not. To have someone care about him so much, he hasn't had this in a long time. But he stays in denial, not ready to face the facts of what he might be feeling. Not yet.

Logan realizes he's well and truly fucked when you find him drinking his sorrows away, again. Some days are better than others but today was just the fucking worst. Doesn't matter he's in another world. It was the day. The night it happened. Falling back to old habits was too easy for him as he sat at the bar stool, ordering drink after drink.

"Logan?" He hears your soft voice from behind him and he tightens the grip on his drink.

"Fucking great," He mumbles as he downs the rest of his drink and puts the glass on the table. He tries to order another but the bartender cuts him off. Not like he can really get drunk anyways with his healing but they cut him off anyway.

"Are you okay?" You place a hand on his arm but he shakes it off.

"Just fine." He gets off the stool and starts to leave but you grab onto his arm.

“Jesus christ just fuck off will you!” He snaps as he tugs his arm out of your grip.

Guilt creeps up on him as he sees your face fall but he turns around and keeps walking. He can't do it anymore, he doesn't deserve your kindness. His super human abilities leads him to be much faster than you. With a huff you take off your jacket and fly up into the air. Landing right in front of him.

"Will you stop it!" You cross your arms as you block his path with your wings.

"I just want to help."

"Well I don't need your help. I never wanted your help but you just had to stick yourself to me. You did that. Not me." He tries to push past you but your wings are strong and even if he's upset he doesn't want to hurt you.

"I did it because you needed it Logan, you may try and hide it but I can tell." You place your hand on his cheek and he sighs.

"You have such a sad aura, so much grief, so much guilt. I couldn't just stand there and let you think that you deserved all of that." Logan smiles sadly. A sad shake of his head as he takes your hand off his cheek.

"Of course, pity the old man huh? Always knew you were too good to me."

How could ever think you felt, that way about him. How could you ever love him, like he...like he loves you.

It hits like a cold splash of water, sobering him up in an instant. The hurt that radiates from him makes you frown as you try to comfort him but he just shakes his head. God he was infuriating sometimes. You can't take it anymore, you can't bare the guilt and anger that radiates off him.

"Just shut up will you!" He's taken back by your frustration. Your wings fold back in as you step closer to him.

"Yes I could sense your pain but I didn't help out of pity Logan, I helped because you deserve to be happy. Because underneath all that pain is a man who deserves to be loved." You lean closer to him, his breath hitches as you kiss him gently.

Your hands cupping his face as your wings slowly wrap around him, covering the two of you in a shroud of privacy.

"So pretty." He mumbles as he pulls back, looking into your eyes deeply before crashing his lips back onto yours. His hands wrap around your waist as nips at your lips making you gasp.

His fingers dig into your sides as he deepens the kiss, passionate and fuck he couldn't get enough of you. Your hands slide down to his chest as he pushes you gently against the nearest wall. When he finally breaks the kiss you keep a tight hold onto his shirt.

"Always so sweet to me angel," You snort and roll your eyes.

"Angel? Real original." You tease.

"Mm, fits though doesn't it." Your wings fold back into themselves as Logan runs his hands along the edge of them.

"Come back home with me, let me show you how sweet I can be yeah?" You smile as you feel the sadness disappearing around him, shrinking back as a new, warmer emotion seeps into the air.

"Take me home Logan." Leaning in you kiss cheek, hoping that one day all the bad feelings will be gone for good and with you by his side, he thinks they will.

[luvsupa]

tags: cowboy!geto x fem!reader, private relationship (bc father doesn’t approve), fluff(ish), angst, sad ending, reader is daughter of a land owner!! + heavily inspired by this art 🙂‍↕️

a/n:UMM THANK U GUYS SM FOR 1.3K FOLLOWERS WHAATTTTT, MWAAAA

the sun blazes down, crickets singing their lazy tune, but your world feels like it’s crashing. your fingers nervously graze the folded newspaper on the wooden bench as you hear his voice, low and smooth as always.

“hiya, pretty.”

your heart leaps at the sight of suguru geto, standing there like the dream he is. his long, silky black hair spills out from beneath a dusty black cowboy hat, cascading over his broad shoulders. dirt covers his forearms, muscles straining under the red plaid shirt barely hanging on by the threads. his black leather jeans hug him in all the right ways, tucked into his tall, scuffed cowboy heel boots, the kind that make your breath hitch every time he walks. 

you smile, trying to keep things light despite the pounding in your chest. you fold the newspaper and place it beside you on the bench. "mmm, shouldn’t you be workin’, handsome?" you tease, squinting against the bright sun as it beats down relentlessly. 

he cocks his head, the wooden toothpick between his lips shifting slightly as he grins. “not today, doll.” but there’s something heavy in his voice that makes your heart skip. he pulls a letter from his back pocket, holding it out. “give this to y’er father, will ya?”

you hesitate, fingers brushing the envelope. it’s addressed in your father’s neat handwriting. “what for? another horse bet?” you laugh softly, but there’s an anxious edge to it. his chuckle, usually warm, feels distant.

“nahhh… ‘m leavin’.”

the words stop you cold. the sun, the crickets, everything fades as you rise from the bench, the hem of your sundress skimming the dusty ground. you can barely breathe.

“n-no, sugu, you can’t leave,” you whisper, voice trembling as tears prick at the edges of your vision. you reach for him, desperate, but he steps back, looking around as if the other farmers might be watching.

“we can’t keep this up, baby. y’know this.” he says softly, eyes full of regret, though he won’t meet your gaze. your grip tightens around the letter, crumpling it in frustration.

“why? do you not love me anymore? is there another woman?” the questions spill out, frantic, as tears spill down your cheeks. his cowboy hat casts a shadow over his face, but you can still see the sadness in his eyes.

he steps closer, his large hands wiping the tears from your face. “he caught us again. found our letters ‘n nearly killed me this time.” 

your heart sinks as the memory floods back—the first time he’d caught you and suguru, the stolen kiss that caused a war between families. it took weeks of tense meetings, your father and geto’s sitting across from each other, finally agreeing that suguru could stay on as a worker, so long as he kept his distance, stayed in line. but your father never trusted him again.

you glance at the other farmers working in the distance, their eyes darting towards your loud sobbing, but you don’t care.

“we can talk to him,” you say, your voice shaky as you grab his hand, trying to pull him toward the barn. “we’ll make him understand.”

but he doesn’t move. he’s planted there, a sorrowful look in his deep violet eyes. his long hair, so soft you used to run your fingers through it, sways slightly in the breeze as he finally speaks.

“he gave me a choice, sweetheart. stay and marry your cousin—or leave.”

you freeze, the weight of his words hitting like a blow to the chest. your heart feels like it’s breaking all over again. you let go of his hand, stepping back in disbelief. his hands cup your face, pulling you back into the moment, his touch gentle despite the sadness between you. 

“i could never do that to you, my sweet girl. i love you too much.” his voice softens as he presses a kiss to your tear stained cheek. you cling to him, not ready to let go, but he’s already slipping away. 

before you can speak, he pulls off one of his silver rings, pressing it into your palm, firmly closing your fingers around it,

“wait for me, darlin’. i promise you, i’ll come back and marry you.”

[mind-intheclouds342]

Do it for them - Co-captain reader x curly

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

You were tapping the end of the pencil in your hand against your leg repeatedly while writing in your notebook, sitting cross-legged on your bed.

"The ship is still moving, but I could perfectly hear its engines from outside... that means it's following a route, it would be great to know where it's taking us... Could the autopilot have been activated unexpectedly?...That would be a miracle... How could we trace the route we are taking?..."

You were thinking out loud and biting the pencil, hoping someone else would respond, but when you turned to your side, there was no one.

You missed him too much.

You needed to clear your head, so you left your room putting on your jacket to take a walk. 

As you stepped out and started wandering the hallways, you could see Jimmy approaching one of the dormitories.

"That is not your bedroom."

You mentioned exalting him and making him turn to look at you.

Jimmy: "I wanted... to see if Anya was okay, she looks very distressed."

"Don't do it, get out of there and leave her alone. Who wouldn't be distressed in a situation like this? Go to your bedroom and try to rest."

You pointed to the end of the hallway, waiting for him to leave, and when he did, you immediately peeked into Anya's room, seeing her deeply asleep in her bed.

You closed his door carefully and looked around, making sure no one was near. 

You decided to do something risky.

You headed to the nursery to try to get in and see Curly, but you felt frustrated when you saw it was locked with a code. You entered one, and end up getting a denied access, you couldn't help but let out a sigh and lean your back against the door, then slid down to sit on the floor.

"Did you seriously set a code so I can't come in and see you when you're alone? That's very cruel of you."

You said, resting your head against the door, hoping he could hear you.

"I'm sorry... I know you must be feeling overwhelmed... I have no idea what state you're in... I don't even know if you can hear me... I want you to know that I'm doing my best to help everyone move forward... But even so, I miss you and I need you with me..."

You started playing with your hands while you continued talking.

"I still don't understand what happened, how we crashed, others think it was you but... It's impossible, you would never do something like that... Right?"

You turned, kneeling in front of the door, resting your forehead against it.

"That's not true, is it? You're not hiding there trying to avoid me because you feel guilty, are you?..."

You let out a small chuckle and gave the door a gentle punch.

"What am I talking about? Obviously, it wasn't your fault... It must have been an unexpected event, something you couldn't control... And I want you to know that I'm on your side... okay?... Goodnigth, darling."

You got up from that place to start walking around the ship, hoping to find some peace before sleeping.

The next day, Anya was very curious about what he was doing to her door. 

Anya: "Is that a latch?"

"Yes, your door opens and closes during the nights, it makes a horrible noise, when you close it you can lock it with the latch to keep it in place."

You said, finishing installing that on the door, you tested it and pulled the door hard to make sure it would take a good hit to break it. 

Anya lowered her head, as if she were hiding her sadness from you. 

"By the way, do you know anything about the gun?"

Anya: "Why are you asking me that?"

"I can't find it anywhere, and I want to keep it out of reach of others, just in case."

Anya: "...No, I'm sorry, I don't know where it could be"

She responded still with her head down.

"Sheesh... I hope no one really has it."

You sighed, cleaning the dirt from your uniform, ready to go out and deliver the daily rations to everyone. 

Anya: "Captain-"

She said almost as if she were letting out a sigh after holding her breath for a few seconds. 

You turned to look at her, hoping she would tell you what she needs. 

Anya: "...Don't forget Curly's rations..."

"Of course not, I've already made sure to set aside something he can consume."

You nodded to continue on your path.

Daisuke: "This is more than yesterday!"

"As I said, Curly can't eat the same as everyone else, so I've had to change the portions, making them a bit more for each one." 

Jimmy: "Ha, I don't think you need more rations."

You took a deep breath, squeezing one of the packages you were handing to Daisuke to the point of making it explode, the cookies inside leaving them in crumbs.

Daisuke: "Aaaw..."

"Oh- I'm sorry- here, take mine-"

You said right away to hand them over. 

Jimmy: "And tell me, (Y/n), have you found a way to return?"

"It takes time, Jimmy, I need time, and calm, and the patience you're making me lose!"

You aimed it, it was clear how your hand was trembling with the same rage you were feeling. 

You still remembered your wedding day, after the ceremony, the disgusting way he looked at you in your dress, and you could hear what he said to Curly. 

"That dress is about to tear apart, why did you marry that?"

Many were surprised by the captain that day; they had never seen Curly so angry with his friend. Jimmy thought he would react the same way when he said other hurtful or unpleasant things, but that wasn't the case. 

You were never going to understand how your husband could be friends with someone so twisted.

And you would never understand how he decided it was a good idea to include him in the crew. 

You held your wrist trying to stop it from trembling and stopped pointing it to smile at him. 

"Here is your food" 

You told him in the end, throwing his rations at his face. 

"When we get home, I will make sure to tell the press that you were the only idiot who did nothing to help, just crying and complaining like a child. It's going to look great on your resume."

You finally handed over his rations to Swansea to leave and continue looking for a way to fix things. 

Swansea: "You're never going to learn, huh? You love to annoy her."

Jimmy just clicked his tongue in annoyance, picking up his rations from the floor to take them to his room and lock himself in there for the rest of the day.

[yourmomsawh0r3]

Fight for me 🍒

pairing: Joel miller x f! reader

warning : NSFW, 18+

summary: After Y/N confronts Joel about her unresolved feelings and receives a crushing rejection, she goes on patrol for weeks leaving Joel to grapple with his guilt and a looming realization that he might lose her forever.

It had been a long day in Jackson, and as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting the town square in a soft orange glow, Y/N stood waiting. She had finally worked up the courage to confront Joel really confront him. They’d been dancing around their feelings for weeks, their stolen glances and the subtle touches that lingered longer than necessary. But Y/N was tired of the waiting, the mixed signals. She needed to know where they stood, even if it meant risking her heart.

Joel approached her cautiously, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his worn jacket. He looked tired, the weight of the world always seemed to rest on his broad shoulders, and today was no different. His brow furrowed slightly when he saw her, his gaze scanning her face as though he already knew what this conversation would be about.

“Y/N,” he greeted her quietly, but she didn’t waste time with pleasantries. Her heart was hammering in her chest, her pulse quickening as she took a step closer to him.

“I need to talk to you, Joel,” she said, her voice firm but soft, vulnerability shining in her eyes.

Joel swallowed hard, already sensing the tension in the air. “I know. I reckon I do too.”

There was a beat of silence between them, the distant sounds of the town fading into the background as the moment grew heavier. Y/N gathered her courage, her hands clenching into fists at her sides to keep from shaking.

“I have feelings for you,” she finally blurted out, her voice trembling slightly but steady enough to get the words out. She watched Joel’s face as her confession sank in, but he didn’t look surprised. His expression didn’t change much at all.

“I care about you, Joel,” she continued, taking a small step toward him. “More than I should. More than I’ve wanted to admit for a long time.”

Joel’s eyes flickered with something regret, sadness, fear but he remained still, like a stone. He didn’t speak, so she kept going, desperate for some kind of response.

“And I know you feel something too. I know you, Joel. I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not watching, the way you always pull away before we can get too close.” Her voice wavered, but she held herself together. “But I can’t keep pretending like it doesn’t mean anything. Not anymore.”

There was a long, suffocating pause before Joel finally spoke, his voice low and gruff. “You can’t have feelings for me, Y/N.”

His words hit her like a punch to the gut. She had braced herself for rejection, but hearing it out loud still cut deep.

“Why?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. “Why can’t I?”

Joel’s jaw tightened, his eyes dropping to the ground as he tried to find the words. His fists were clenched in his pockets, his whole body tense with the effort of holding back what he really wanted to say.

“Because I ain’t good for you,” he muttered, his voice rough with the weight of years of guilt and loss. “You deserve better than what I got to give.”

Y/N’s heart twisted painfully in her chest, but she refused to back down. “You don’t get to decide that for me, Joel.”

His eyes shot up to meet hers, dark and conflicted. “Yes, I do. I can’t, I can’t do this.”

“Why not?” she pressed, her frustration bubbling to the surface. “Why won’t you let yourself feel something? Why won’t you fight for me?”

Joel took a step back, shaking his head. “Because I can’t, Y/N. You don’t understand.”

“Then make me understand!” she pleaded, stepping closer to him. “Tell me why you keep pushing me away when I know you feel the same!”

His eyes glistened with something unreadable as he stared at her, and for a moment, Y/N thought he might actually break, that he might finally open up and tell her the truth.

But instead, Joel’s face hardened, and he took another step back, his hands trembling as he pulled them from his pockets. “I’m broken, Y/N. I’m not the man you think I am. I’ve lost too much. I can’t lose again.”

His words stung, the rawness in his voice slicing through her, but Y/N wasn’t giving up not yet. “You don’t have to lose anything. I’m right here, Joel. All I’m asking is for you to take a chance. Just… fight for me.”

Joel’s face twisted with pain, and for a fleeting second, she saw the cracks in his armor, saw how badly he wanted to take her hand, pull her close, and never let her go. But then, like a switch, the walls came back up, and his expression turned cold.

“I can’t,” he whispered, the finality in his voice breaking her heart. “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat, her vision blurring with unshed tears as she watched him turn his back on her, walking away without looking back. He left her standing there, alone in the center of the town square, her chest aching as she watched him disappear into the crowd.

She had laid her heart bare, and he had walked away.

Days passed after that moment. Joel avoided her, throwing himself into work, doing everything he could to keep his mind off the mess he’d made. But the gnawing guilt, the anger at himself, wouldn’t go away. He’d see her around town talking to people, carrying supplies and each time, the knot in his stomach tightened. He had been so stupid. She was everything, and he’d pushed her away, too scared to even try.

Joel was a man who built walls high enough to keep anyone from getting too close, and lately, he'd found himself battling his emotions more than ever. For weeks, Joel had been caught in a constant struggle with himself, feelings of guilt and shame pulling him in opposite directions as his attraction toward Y/N grew stronger.

She was everything he hadn’t allowed himself to want in a long time kind, sharp-witted, and brave. She brought light to the dark corners of Jackson, a beacon in a place where hope was scarce. Joel had spent countless nights alone, staring at the ceiling in his small cabin, wrestling with his thoughts, questioning whether he deserved to feel something for her. Sarah, the loss, the years spent surviving rather than living it all weighed heavy on his soul. How could he possibly think about moving forward? How could he let someone in again?

His frustrations with himself only made things worse. He’d been distant, cold, pushing Y/N away every time she tried to get closer. It wasn’t fair to her. But Joel was too damn scared to let himself care. It was easier to stay in his misery than risk feeling that pain again.

“Joel, you can’t keep doing this,” Tommy had told him more than once, his brother sensing the turmoil simmering beneath the surface. But Joel always brushed him off, muttering excuses about keeping things professional or how he didn’t need more complications in his life. Yet, no matter how much distance he put between them, he couldn’t stop his mind from drifting to Y/N.

Then today, it was worse. Y/N had gone out on patrol.

Jackson’s patrols were routine by now, but they weren’t without their risks. Joel usually joined them, but this time he’d opted out, knowing she’d be out there. He thought it would help to put some distance between them, maybe clear his head. Instead, it only made the gnawing ache in his chest worse. The hours dragged on, each passing minute fueling his restless energy. Joel couldn’t sit still. He was on edge, pacing his cabin, berating himself for how he’d treated her. All he could think about was her smile, how she used to lean against his shoulder after a long day. How he’d shrugged her off the last time she tried to talk to him.

“Damn it, Joel. What the hell is wrong with you?”

His mind raced with the guilt of pushing her away. Y/N was out there, doing her job, and all he could think about was how he’d been too much of a coward to let her in. He grabbed his jacket, ran his hands through his hair, then stopped in his tracks. She deserved better than what he had to offer. “Maybe it’s for the best.”

But a sudden, gut-wrenching feeling pulled at him a fear he couldn’t shake. Something wasn’t right.

His boots thudded against the wooden floor as he headed for the door, an anxious knot tightening in his chest. He made his way toward the gates of Jackson, as if his feet had taken over, instinct pulling him there without thought. His hands were shaking, and he shoved them into his pockets to hide it. “She’s fine. She’ll be fine.”

But the moment he saw the group returning through the gates, the world around him seemed to stop. He spotted her instantly, Y/N walking, limping slightly, with blood streaking down her arm and a nasty cut along her forehead. His heart lurched into his throat.

“Y/N!” Joel’s voice cracked as he pushed his way through the crowd, ignoring the questioning stares. Panic surged through him as he reached her, his eyes wild with concern.

Y/N’s gaze met his, her eyes tired but still as strong as ever. “Joel—”

He didn’t give her a chance to finish. “What the hell happened? Are you okay?” His voice was thick with worry, his hands already hovering over her injuries, unsure of where to start. He could see the blood seeping through her clothes, her shirt torn and stained. “Jesus, you’re bleeding.”

“It’s not as bad as it looks,” she tried to assure him, but Joel’s jaw tightened.

His hands, rough and calloused, gently cupped her face as his eyes frantically scanned over her wounds. She winced slightly at the touch, but her lips twitched into a small, reassuring smile.

“Joel, I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not fine,” he snapped, his voice low and strained, filled with guilt. “I shouldn’t have let you go out there. I—”

“It’s my job,” Y/N interrupted softly, her hand reaching up to grip his wrist. “I’m okay, really.”

But Joel wasn’t hearing it. The panic, the fear that had consumed him the moment he saw her hurt, was too much. His chest felt tight, and the world around him blurred. He had pushed her away for weeks, told himself it was for the best, and now seeing her like this, it was like a punch to the gut. “He had fucked it up.” He couldn’t lose her, not after everything.

“Don’t..don’t do that,” he muttered, shaking his head as he pulled her closer. “Don’t pretend like this is nothing. It ain’t nothing to me.”

His confession hung in the air, heavy with emotion. Y/N blinked, her brows furrowing as she searched his face.

“Joel, what are you?”

“I’ve been a damn fool,” he admitted, his voice rough and broken. “I’ve been pushing you away, and I don’t even know why anymore. I thought I couldn’t thought I wasn’t allowed to feel this way again. But I can’t lose you, Y/N. I can’t.”

Her breath hitched at his words, the raw vulnerability in his voice catching her off guard. She had always known there was something more beneath his gruff exterior, but hearing it like this… she hadn’t expected it.

“You won’t lose me,” Y/N whispered, her hand moving to rest against his chest, feeling the rapid thump of his heart beneath her palm. “Joel, I’m here. I’m right here.”

He exhaled shakily, his forehead resting against hers as the weight of his fear and guilt crashed over him. His fingers gently traced the edge of the cut on her forehead, and for the first time in a long time, Joel allowed himself to feel to really feel what had been building inside him for so long.

“I should’ve told you,” he muttered, his voice hoarse. “I should’ve been honest. I’m sorry.”

Y/N leaned into him, her lips brushing against his cheek in a gesture of comfort. “It’s okay, Joel. We’ll figure it out.”

And for the first time in weeks, Joel believed her. He hadn’t lost everything he hadn’t lost her.

Y/N gazed up at Joel, her heart pounding in her chest as she took in the raw emotion etched into his handsome features. His hands trembled slightly as they cupped her face, his thumbs brushing gently over her cheeks. The air between them crackled with a tension that had been building for weeks, the unspoken feelings and longing finally boiling to the surface.

Joel's eyes searched hers intensely, the blue depths swirling with a maelstrom of emotions fear, guilt, regret, and something else, something that made Y/N's breath catch in her throat. His voice was low and rough when he spoke, each word laden with meaning.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Joel murmured, his forehead resting against hers as he struggled to find the right words. "I'm sorry for pushing you away, for not being able to see what was right in front of me. I was a damn fool."

Y/N's heart clenched at the raw vulnerability in his voice, her hands coming up to grip the front of his shirt. "Joel, you don't have to apologize," she breathed, her lips brushing against his jawline. "I understand. I do."

"No, you don't," he insisted, pulling back just enough to look her in the eye. "I've been so caught up in my own head, in my own pain, that I couldn't see how much you've come to mean to me. I couldn't let myself feel it."

Y/N's brows furrowed, her fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt. "Joel, I'm not going anywhere," she whispered fiercely. "No matter what happens, I'm here. I'll always be here."

Something shifted in Joel's expression, a flicker of determination hardening his jaw. "I don't want you to go anywhere," he growled, his hands sliding down to her waist, pulling her flush against him. "I want you here, with me. Always."

Joel Miller cooked a romantic dinner for Y/N, complete with candles, soft music, and a delicious meal. After dinner, he walked her to her door, his hand warm and strong in hers.

As they reached the doorway, Joel turned to Y/N, his blue eyes filled with tenderness. "I had a really nice time tonight," he murmured, squeezing her hand. "Dinner was perfect."

Y/N gazed up at him, a soft smile on her lips. "It was lovely," she agreed, squeezing his hand back. "Thank you for cooking for me, Joel. It means a lot."

Joel brushed a stray curl behind her ear, his fingers lingering on her cheek. "Anything for you, angel," he said softly. "I'd do anything to make you happy."

Y/N's heart fluttered in her chest at his words. She could feel the love and devotion radiating off him, and it made her feel cherished and adored. "I'm so glad we found each other," she whispered, leaning into his touch. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Joel's hand slid down to cup her chin, tilting her face up to his. "You'll never have to find out," he promised, his voice low and intense. "I'm not going anywhere, Y/N. I'm yours, always and forever."

Y/N's breath caught in her throat as Joel's head dipped down, his lips brushing hers in a tender kiss. She melted into him, her arms wrapping around his neck as she kissed him back with all the love and passion in her heart.

The night air was cool as Y/N and Joel strolled back to her place, hands lightly brushing against each other, fingers occasionally intertwining. It was a comfortable silence between them, the kind that spoke volumes about their connection. Joel's heart was racing, knowing that he was about to spend the night with this captivating woman. Her green eyes sparkled in the moonlight, and her freckles, dusted across her cheeks, seemed to dance as she smiled at him.

As they reached her doorstep, Y/N turned, facing Joel, her expression a mix of desire and shyness. "Thank you for a wonderful evening, Joel. Goodnight."

Joel's throat went dry. He wanted to say something, something meaningful, but all he managed was a hoarse, "Goodnight, Y/N."

He turned to leave, his footsteps echoing on the pavement. But something pulled him back, an irresistible urge to see her again, to feel her warmth. He hesitated, then, in a swift motion, turned on his heels and headed back towards her house.

Just as he raised his hand to knock, the door swung open, and Y/N stood there, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Without a word, she grabbed the front of Joel's shirt, pulling him inside with a force that surprised him. The door slammed shut behind them, the sound echoing through the quiet house.

"Thought you'd leave without saying goodbye, huh?" Y/N teased, her voice low and sultry.

Joel, caught off guard by her sudden aggression, found himself pressed against the closed door, Y/N's body flush against his. He could feel her breath on his neck, sending shivers down his spine. "I... I couldn't leave without seeing you again," he managed to whisper.

"Good," she purred, her hands now roaming freely over his chest, making his heart pound even harder. "Because I've been thinking about this all night. About how good it would feel to have you inside me."

Joel's breath caught in his throat as her words, laced with raw desire, washed over him. He felt his control slipping away, replaced by a primal urge to possess her, to brand her as his.

Y/N's hands found the buttons of his shirt, deftly undoing them one by one, her touch sending sparks of pleasure through his body. As the fabric fell away, she traced her fingers along his chest, her nails lightly scraping his skin, leaving a trail of fire in their wake.

"You're so beautiful," she whispered, her lips brushing against his ear, sending shivers down his spine. "I want to taste every inch of you."

With that, she dropped to her knees, her hands working at his belt, fingers fumbling with the buckle, driven by her eagerness. Joel groaned, his hands threading through her hair, the soft strands slipping between his fingers. He felt exposed and vulnerable, yet utterly consumed by desire.

Y/N's lips found the tip of his erection, now freed from the confines of his pants, and she took him into her mouth, her tongue swirling around the head, tasting him, memorizing every inch. Her hands cupped his balls, gently massaging them as she took him deeper, her throat working to accommodate his length.

"Fuck, Y/N," Joel gasped, his head thrown back, his body arching towards her. "You're incredible."

She pulled back, a satisfied smile on her face, a glistening strand of saliva connecting her lips to the head of his cock. "I aim to please," she whispered, before taking him into her mouth again, this time with more urgency.

Joel's hands tightened in her hair, his hips thrusting gently, encouraging her actions. He could feel the pressure building, his breath coming in short gasps, his body on the brink of something explosive.

"Wait," he managed to say, his voice hoarse with need. "I want you, all of you."

Y/N rose, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. She kicked off her shoes and swiftly undressed, revealing her slender body, her breasts full and pert, her nipples hard with desire. She wore nothing but a smile and a small silver chain around her waist, drawing Joel's eyes to the glistening wetness between her thighs.

Joel kicked off his shoes and shimmied out of his pants, his eyes never leaving her. He was hard, aching with need, his cock standing proudly, twitching with anticipation.

Y/N backed towards the nearby couch, her movements graceful, like a feline stalking its prey. She sat on the edge, spreading her legs, inviting him with her eyes. Joel needed no further encouragement. He moved between her thighs, positioning himself at her entrance, feeling her heat enveloping him.

With one smooth thrust, he filled her, their bodies becoming one. Y/N's eyes widened, a soft moan escaping her lips as she adjusted to his size. Joel paused, giving her a moment to acclimate to his presence, his hands gripping her thighs, feeling the softness of her skin.

"You feel so good," he whispered, his voice thick with desire. "So tight and warm."

"More," she breathed, her hands pulling him closer, her nails digging into his shoulders. "Please, Joel, more."

Joel began to move, his hips thrusting slowly at first, then with increasing urgency, each stroke pushing deeper, eliciting moans and gasps from Y/N. Her fingers dug into his back, leaving marks that would remind them of this moment.

"You're so beautiful," he groaned, his eyes drinking in the sight of her, her hair tousled, her freckles more pronounced as her passion rose. "Your freckles are perfect, like stars in the night sky."

Y/N's eyes fluttered open, meeting his gaze, and she smiled, a smile that reached her eyes, making his heart skip a beat. "I love the way you look at me," she whispered, her voice breathless.

Joel's movements became more frantic, his body building towards an inevitable climax. He felt Y/N's walls clenching around him, her body responding to his, their connection deepening with every thrust.

"I'm close," she panted, her nails scraping his back, marking him as her own. "Oh God, Joel, I'm so close."

Joel's body was on fire, his senses alive with the feel and taste of Y/N. He thrust harder, faster, wanting to give her everything, wanting to see her fly apart in his arms.

"You're so tight around me," he grunted, his voice raw with desire. "I'm gonna cum, Y/N. I'm gonna fill you up."

Y/N's eyes widened, her body tensing, and then she was crying out, her climax crashing over her, her walls rippling around him, milking him as she rode out her orgasm. Joel followed, his own release overwhelming him, his cock throbbing as he emptied himself deep inside her, filling her with his essence.

They collapsed, a tangle of limbs, onto the couch, their hearts pounding, their breath coming in ragged gasps. Joel held Y/N close, his hands stroking her back, feeling the rise and fall of her chest as their breathing slowly returned to normal.

"You're incredible," he whispered, his lips brushing her temple. "I've never felt anything like that."

Y/N smiled, a satisfied, post-coital glow on her face. "You're pretty amazing yourself, Joel Miller," she purred, her fingers tracing patterns on his chest. "And you taste like cherries, did you know that?"

Joel laughed, a deep, contented sound, and pulled her closer, burying his face in her sweet-smelling hair. "I think I'm gonna need a lot more of your special flavor, Y/N. I'm not sure I can ever get enough."

They lay there, wrapped in each other's arms, their bodies still buzzing with the aftermath of their passionate encounter, both knowing that this was just beginning of their story.

[norrizzandpia]

I Love Your Body (LN4)

Summary: It was the mirrors.

Warnings: sexual innuendos, language, reader is insinuated to have big boobs, talks of deep insecurity

Note: wrote it bc i have no one to tell me this and wanted to wallow in that thought?

Note (part 2): it’s shorter bc I’m tired!

Y/n walked through the door, sunken shoulders and a frown prominent on her face. Lando trudged in at the sounds, smiling brightly as his girlfriend came into view.

“Hi, baby! How was shopping?” He inquired, eyebrows scrunched together when he saw her hands empty.

“You didn’t buy anything?” He asked again, still confused as she avoided his eye contact and tried to slip past him.

He grabbed her arm gently, “What’s wrong?”

Her eyes looked up at him, swallowed whole by a sadness he couldn’t quite place. She stayed quiet as she looked at him before shrugging out of his hold and moving towards their shared bedroom.

He followed her, “Love, what’s going on?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” She murmured, slipping into their bathroom and shutting the door, locking it. His face stared at the white door, the shower turning on, as he continued talking to her.

“Y/n, let me in. Please, baby. What’s going on?” He tried to think back on their day, wondering if he had done something to make her mad or her friends that she had gone out with, but he came up empty.

He sat outside the door, listening to the water trickle down the tiled floor and letting the feeling of determination manifest in his chest.

When the water shut off and silence greeted his ears again, Lando stood up, knocking on the door once more.

“Y/n?” The door clicked, his girlfriend dressed in the same clothes came out. His face scrunched up, “Didn’t you just shower?”

She nodded softly, walking over to the dresser and picking out pajamas.

He tilted his head, “Then why are you in the same clothes?”

She groaned under her breath, “I don’t know, Lando.”

He scoffed, arms flying out beside him, “Okay, what the fuck is going on? What did I do to upset you? Was it me? Or your friends? Y/n, what’s going on?”

She shook her head, turning around to face him with pleading eyes, “Lan, please, I just want to be alone.”

His eyes bulged, “No! I’m your boyfriend! It’s my job to be here for you when you’re struggling!”

It was the raising of his voice that broke her down, tears immediately welling in her eyes before she whispered, “It was the mirrors.”

Suddenly, his annoyance withdrew and he was taking a few steps forward, “I don’t understand, my love.”

She sighed, looking down, “We were trying things on at the boutique downtown and it was the mirrors, Lan. I looked horrible. I couldn’t even get the clothing off the hanger once I saw the way I looked without anything on.”

At that, pure empathy for the girl he loved filled his body and he closed the distance between them. Cupping her face in his hands, Lando stared down at her in disbelief, “Love, don’t say things like that.”

The tears fell down her cheeks harder as she cried, “But, it’s true! I’ve got big arms, and a stomach, and red, raw stretch marks! Don’t get me started on my thighs and how ugly my boobs are! Have you seen them? I don’t know how you ever have wanted to look at them, let alone them be one of your favorite parts of me. They’re too big and ruin every outfit I put on. It’s just- I-”

She broke down harder in his arms, hands coming to cover her face as she shook with self-loathing. Lando stood, at a loss for words, as his girlfriend said things he couldn’t even fathom.

When her forehead landed on his chest, her tears soaking his shirt, he moved his hand to smooth down her hair, holding it to him, as the other tugged her waist closer. When she was as close as could be, he leaned down and whispered softly in her ear, “Y/n, none of that is true. I wish you would see yourself the way I do. You are so smart, so kind, cherished by everyone around you. You are everything,” He continued, trailing his arms to trace her arms, “Your arms are perfect and they have comforted me during dark times. I love your hugs, they’re my favorite, because the way your arms feel around me is so incredibly special.” He moved to caress the skin of her stomach, “Baby, there’s nothing wrong with your stomach. It’s where you’ll carry our kids when we’re ready to have them. I love that the most about it.” Though he couldn’t see them, Lando knew where her stretch marks were, having traced over them every chance he got. His hands over her ass, he went on, “The stretch marks here? There’s nothing ugly about them. In fact, I think they’re quite cool. Little marks which show the way your body has grown with you? Fucking sick, baby.” Her small giggle made his heart soar triumphantly before his hands cupped the bottom of her butt, laying halfway over her thighs, “And your thighs? Y/n, they’re so hot. If you know what I mean.” He wiggles his eyebrows and she continues her giggling, head still stuffed in his chest. His last destination is her boobs, stepping away from her to look down at them as if they aren’t hidden beneath her shirt. When she catches the glint in his eye, she rolls her eyes playfully. At that, he starts, “Your boobs? Are you fucking kidding me, love? The bigger the better, baby! They have never and will never ruin an outfit or make you look any less beautiful than you are. I don’t just love them because of how turned on I am by them, I love them for how comforting they are too. You might not understand, but to come home after a bad race or stressful day and lie between them? Heaven, baby. Heaven.”

When he’s finished, Y/n smiles slightly at him before wrapping her arms around his waist and murmuring whispers of gratitude. He invites her warmly, wrapping her safely, wholly in his arms as he whispers back, “Don’t shut me out when you’re feeling like this. I hate thinking about you convincing yourself of these lies. You’re so gorgeous, Y/n, and I know it may not feel that way, but you are, and I’ll spend everyday, every second, telling you until you believe me.”

Nuzzling further into him, she smiled, “Thank you.”

“Always, baby. Always.”

[disasterofastory]

New things (Brahms Heelshire x Reader)

New things // Brahms Heelshire Masterlist Brahms Heelshire x Reader Kinktober 2023 - 7/14 Warnings: facesitting

Summary: Brahms finds interesting things on the internet.

The air is thick and heavy in the bathroom. Your reflection in the mirror is obscure because of the steam. Small water drops run down the surface, holding onto the bottom until they land on the edge of the sink. Your nostrils are filled with the scent of your shampoo and lotions. Honey and something else you picked out from the shelf without looking. Your hair is still wet, and the towel around you is soft and warm.

"I still don't understand why you didn't join me," you speak up when stepping into your room, you meet the view of Brahms sitting on the edge of your bed. Your laptop is on his lap. The bright screen illuminates his features, highlighting the rough marks on his face. When he doesn't look at you, you continue with a small frown. "If you continue like this, I have to set screen time for you." Still nothing. "Brahms? Are you okay?" Now you start to worry.

Ever since you have an internet connection, you try to teach Brahms about it as much as you can without overwhelming him. It's fun and sad at the same time. This is the closest he has gotten to the real world in many years. There are things he doesn't understand and things that fascinate him. He already made you order an ebook reader, and you added a few clothes, too you think would look good on him.

"Nothing," he replies after a while, putting away your laptop to focus his attention on you. His eyes rake over your body with appreciation. Yeah, you don't believe him. "What is it, Brahms?" "I saw something on the internet, and I want to try it with you." You are surprised. "Okay," you reply carefully. "What did you see?" "I want you to sit on my face." Now you are shocked. "And where did you see that?" Even the thought of you sitting on his face is enough to make you excited, but the blush appearing on his cheeks makes you even more impatient for what happens next. "Does it matter?" Brahms asks, scowling and pouting. "No," you reply with a sigh. You decide to leave the subject at least for now, so you can enjoy your night with Brahms without him getting upset. "So," you grin down at him when you step between his legs. Your fingers rake through his hair, grabbing a few curls to make him look at you. You can feel his warm hands on the back of your legs as he slips up and up under the white towel still covering your body. "Do you have a plan or…?" Without a word, he stands up, towering over you and placing his hand at the back of your neck to pull you into a quick kiss. Brahms nibbles on your bottom lip, biting the soft flesh before pushing his tongue into your mouth. He tastes like tea. "Take it off," you murmur against his lips, tugging on his shirt. The moment his chest is bare in front of you, your hands find their way to his abs and the soft hair that covers his body. You love touching and caressing him almost as much as he loves being under your hands. "Take it off," Brahms repeats your words, but even before his quiet command can register in your mind, the towel is already on the ground, leaving you gasping and bare in front of his hungry gaze. His attention falls onto your breasts for a second, seemingly fighting with himself before turning around and laying down in the middle of the bed. It's so robotic that you almost laugh. Okay, you need to talk with him about vibes and romantic settings before strutting into the middle of everything, but it can wait.

"Okay," you breathe out, climbing next to him and noticing his erection already tenting his pajama pants. "Sit on my face, Y/N," he says again, lifting his head to look at you. "Did you hear about patience before?" You ask him without wanting an answer. "Help me." Brahms reaches out for your hand, helping you balance until you kneel above his face. It's new for you, too. You are surprised that after everything you did with Brahms, there is still something that makes you almost shy.

Before you can adjust yourself better, he already lifts his head again. His tongue stretches into your warmth, sliding over your slit for a quick taste. The tip of his tongue swipes your clit repeatedly, flicking and teasing. "I said sit," he grunts angrily, grabbing your thighs harder to tug you onto his face entirely. A shriek escapes your lips and echoes off the walls at the sudden movement. He groans something into your pussy when you try to shift your weight off his mouth, and he doesn't let you. His fingers dig into your flesh.

Fuck.

He licks on your clit back and forth before sealing his lips around the sensitive bud to suck the soul out of you. Your body trembles and jerks at the sudden pleasure. Your hands reach out for the wooden headrest to hold onto something. "Brahms!" You cry out his name in shock when you feel his teeth nibble on you before soothing the slight sting with his tongue. "More, baby," you tell him desperately. "Give me more." Brahms feasts on your pussy, letting your juices soak his face and beard. He rubs your clit, opens your folds, and pokes your hole before swiping his tongue all over your slit. Meanwhile, your hips start to rock down on his mouth. You grind against his face, chasing your pleasure. His hands go back to your ass, gripping your cheeks to push you a bit forward until he can plunge his tongue into your dripping channel. You are warm and wet around him. His senses are full of your taste and scent. "Can you even breathe?" You gasp out, ready to move away, but he holds you down. A muffled grunt is your only answer, and the vibration of his deep voice strikes through your body. Your head falls back, and black dots dance and swirl in front of your eyes. His tongue works in and out of your pussy, gulping down everything you can give him. He pushes into you as deep as possible. In and out. In and out. "Brahms!" You scream his name again. One of your hands goes down between your legs to rub on your clit. The burning coil in your stomach flares through your veins and makes your limbs numb and heavy. "You're doing so good," you tell him, still grinding.

Brahms's cock still throbs in his pants, wanting your mouth or tits, but the man's attention is entirely elsewhere. He wants you to cum on his face, into his mouth. He wants to drown in your nectar until he knows nothing but you and only you.

You can feel your climax building inside of you with rapid speed. It trembles through your spine and roots in your belly.

"I will- I will-" You don't even have enough time to warn him. Your walls flutter around his tongue, and your clit throbs under your fingertips. You moan and whine above him. Your voice mixes with his grunts and groans under you. Your hips twitch and rock until every energy leaves your body.

Brahms laps on your pussy hurriedly, wanting your taste on his tongue before you move to the bed next to him.

And you look beautiful when you fall onto your bottom. A thin layer of sweat shines on your skin, and your bottom lip is swollen and red from biting it almost the whole time. Pride stretches in his chest as he watches you try to clear your mind. Your gaze is unfocused and glassy.

You need long minutes to calm down and notice the dark, wet spot on his pants. Your lips twitch into a taunting smirk even though you are still panting. "Oh," you coo. "My good boy cum in his pants?" He blushes again. His face and beard glint with your wetness smeared all over him. "Do you want me to clean you up?" You offer, already reaching down under the waistband of his pajama. "Please," he whispers, pushing his hips against your hand.

Maybe letting Brahms explore the internet some more is not a bad idea after all.

[daenysx]

this is like the summary of my morning- without the boys, sadly. i woke up really bad and writing this helped a lot, i hope you enjoy too! ♡

poly!marauders x fem!reader, mostly fluff - a little hurt/comfort maybe

an almost ruined morning

you wake up angry for no reason this morning.

maybe no reason isn't right; you're stressed because of your final week, mostly thanks to the high pressure you put on yourself and one of your closest friends cancelled your study date for today. you blink your eyes open with slight panic, irritation makes your stomach achy. there's also a headache that starts forming, a nice ribbon on top of your package of stress.

it must be raining out there, you hear the water drops hitting against the window. the boys are nowhere to be seen, they must've woken up earlier than you. you leave the empty bed with glossy eyes, almost tearing up for not waking up early enough to get some school work done. that wasn't what you planned last night.

"there she is." james sees you first. he opens his arms for you. "good morning, pretty girl."

"morning." you mumble, burying your face to his chest. he smells like aftershave and shower gel, slight coffee and a hint of cigarettes which you think he gets from kissing remus. he wraps his arms around you, holding you tight.

"are you okay?" he whispers to your ear. you're sure he gives a look behind you to remus, not understanding what happens.

"i was gonna wake up early to do my readings." you say against his chest.

he strokes your hair, feeling the uneasiness in your voice. "it's still early babe, you can start after breakfast, hmm?"

remus comes next to you, rubbing your back and giving you a kiss on your hair. "i thought you were gonna meet with shelby today for studying."

he came home late last night so he doesn't know you won't be seeing shelby. "she cancelled. said she has something came up." you murmur.

"yeah?" remus raises an eyebrow. "does that mean we get to spend time together?"

you nod into james's chest, discomfort creeps into your hands. shaky hands, pins and needles. you don't know why you're so nervous.

sirius comes into kitchen, hand in his hair to shape his wet curls up. he gives you a huge smile when he sees you. "good morning!" he says brightly. you immediately sense he's in the mood for a happy morning. you wish you could feel the same.

"morning, siri." you say, still leaning to james but your face is turned to the boys.

"what's wrong?" sirius asks. "what's with the pout, angel girl?"

"i don't know." you admit. "i woke up angry and sad, and i wanna study but i can't. i don't know."

you say the last part with a shaky voice and that makes boys frown. you bury yourself back to james's chest, embarrassed and silly, you don't feel like you can deal with this. you're being too extra and you just woke up.

"okay." james says. "it's fine, baby, it's normal. let's go lay on couch a bit, yeah?"

remus gives him an approving look. james leads you into living room, you lay down angrily. he takes the fluffiest blanket to cover your bodies. you can hear sirius drying his hair in the bathroom and remus starts the kettle for tea.

you are more than willing to stay against james, he's big and soft for you. with his muscular arms wrapped around you, you feel safe. hidden from everything, and it's nice. he kisses your forehead, his glasses are on the coffee table. he rubs your back with a huge hand. you breathe shakily, definitely unable to relax.

"sweetheart." he whispers. "we gotta relax a bit, okay?" he puts your head on his chest, right where his heart beats. "can you follow my breathing?"

you try to do as he says. your eyes are closed, your ear is pressed against your lover's heart. it's not so easy to do but you succeed after a long minute. "it's okay." he whispers, kissing your head. "relax, baby."

your head stops pounding after a while, that's good. you hear silent steps into the room, remus comes in with a steaming mug and a full plate. he puts them on the coffee table before coming to your side, his long fingers are gentle on your hair.

"feel any better?" he asks. you nod, looking at him from james's chest. he motions the table with his eyes. "do you want to have some breakfast? i got you your favorite."

"thank you." you say, eyes filled with tears suddenly. remus coos lovingly, he leans in to dry your tears. you can't handle them being so gentle with you, feeling like you ruined their morning. they still take care of you when you're being useless on the couch. "i'm sorry." you say.

"sorry for what?" sirius asks, joining you in the room. "you're too lovely to say sorry for anything, babe, please stop."

you cry for a few minutes, letting it out with gentle encouragements from boys. the stress of everything makes you lightheaded, you don't want to feel like this. you don't want to cry over academics anymore, you want to be a person who can adapt to quick changes when things don't go as planned. your tears wet james's shirt but he doesn't seem to care, his calm eyes following you. you get tired. you feel so tired.

you sit up, done with the crying. you rub your eyes, remus holds your both hands in his one hand as he uses the other one to dry your tears softly. he has a look of understanding on his face, you are grateful for the sentiment.

"can i have some tea?" you ask. sirius hands you the cup quickly, you take a few sips before looking at them. james wants to wipe the look of guilt off your face, he holds your hand.

"i'm sorry." you say. "i don't know what came over me."

"you have nothing to say sorry for." james says. "it's okay if you don't feel well, lovely."

"it's just-" you start. "i can't spend the time i think of doing things by actually doing them and- it stresses me out. like i'm always competing against time."

you take another sip from your tea. saying what upsets you out loud is a nice feeling, knowing they'll never judge you. they actually listen and understand, they will stay with you no matter what.

"you have 10 days until the finals, right?" remus asks.

you nod. "but i have to finish a paper before that."

"but still it means you have time." remus comes, sits on the empty spot on the couch. he cups your cheeks, his heart breaks at the sight of your tired eyes. "i think- we can spend today by resting and helping you get some sleep. you brain can't function properly if you don't take care of yourself, dove."

you nod. "okay."

"okay." he kisses your forehead. "good."

you finish your tea, and take a bite of the breakfast remus prepared for you. you don't feel like eating much but still force yourself to eat some of it. remus takes your empty cup to kitchen and james leaves to open the window in the bedroom now that the rain has stopped. fresh air will be nice.

"don't worry please." you say softly to sirius. he looks upset, nothing like his sparkly mood before. "i'm sorry i made you sad."

he can't resist it, takes you into his arms. you are more than happy to follow him, putting your head on the curve of his shoulder. he keeps you, smiles only a bit. "you have nothing to be sorry for. i just- i hate seeing you cry."

"i know."

"i wanna put a smile on your pretty face." he says, cupping your cheeks. "you're cute with the pout, but i'd prefer a smile."

you smile. a real smile, just what he deserves. you actually show him your teeth, he kisses you. "do you really think i'm cute?" you flirt, trying to get one more kiss from him. his kisses are healing.

"i think you're more than cute." he kisses your nose. "i can prove it."

"are you trying to make her faint, pads?" james asks, coming back to your side.

he might be right because sirius has always had this effect on you. you lose yourself when he kisses you, and it's good. it makes you forget your problems. he makes you feel brave, like you can achieve anything you want. he kisses you once more, your eyes are closed. james admires the sight.

"finally got a smile on her face, do you see that?" sirius says. "don't be jealous, prongs."

"i'm jealous." remus says, sitting on the other side of you. "i want a kiss."

he is teasing more than usual, to cheer you up. you give him a good kiss as he takes you to his lap. james sits on the empty spot you left, playing with sirius's hair. it's definitely how they flirt.

"maybe you should put a smile on my face too, huh?" james says to his boyfriend. "gorgeous."

sirius kisses him, his hand slipping into james's curls. they start talking after, a quiet chat about their games. everything goes back to normal now that you feel better. remus keeps you on his lap, though. you don't think he'll leave you for a while. he likes the reassurance of your wellness, he likes the quiet kisses you press on his neck when you wanna stop thinking. he likes how you play with his fingers.

remus brushes his lips to the side of your head. "better, lovely?"

you nod. it's not a lie, you feel better. sometimes it's good to cry about things, especially when you're treated like this by your boys. you just need some time to settle down, you think. remus's lap is the perfect place to think about things and then forget them, he rubs your back with occasional neck kisses and you fall asleep right there.

♡

(ps; the pics are from pinterest, they don't belong to me)

[cutiecusp]

I just had this idea come to me, so I had to scribble it down, so it's unedited, and written in 30 mins. It's non canon, has some inaccuracies, mention of war, death, mention of erasing memories. and a little angst. HEA.

What if reader was an angel, sent to protect John, but the payment for saving his life, and keeping her species safe was she had to erase his memories of her, every time?

And what if this time he says no.

He knew this was it.

His team were safely out, and he could hear the evac team coming for them, but John, as stubborn as he was, made a sacrifice to save the others.

The heavy wooden beam finally broke, the fire too hot to escape through, so he found his last cigar, lighting it from the flame blocking the door, took his tactical vest off, and sent a silent prayer to the universe.

Unbeknownst to him, you were already on your way.

The rooms temperature dipped, startling Price awake. The flames had gone, leaving behind burnt debris everywhere.

Completely unharmed, Price stood up, shaking his head in confusion.

"You are awake." A soft voice calls out, echoing around the room.

His gaze snaps to you, a fellow soldier in uniform, a black mask not unlike Ghosts covering the lower half of your face.

He grabs his pistol from the table.

"Who are you?" He asks, caution in his tone.

"I guess you could call me an angel." You shrug, your emotions masked by your face covering.

He scoffs, an eyebrow raised.

"There isn't such a thing."

You sigh, and unfurl your wings, a little singed along the bottom and the very top. Almost bat like, you stretch and sigh in relief.

His face drops, his eyes unable to look away.

"You..."

You smile, a little sadly, reaching for him.

"John. I need you to listen."

He stills. He knows that tone. That's the tone he uses to break it to the team that a mission is going sour.

"How do you know my name?" He asks, his brow furrowing in confusion.

Your hand reaches and gently brushes his forearm.

"John, this isn't the first time we've met." You admit, your tone serious.

"What do you mean?" He asks, stepping away from you, and reaching for his vest.

"John. I need you to understand, I did what I had to." You explain.

"I'm listening." Came the cool, even tone.

"I've saved you and your team multiple times over the years. Simon in the Alps? Johnny in London, even Gaz from a bloody rope."

His gaze landed on yours, searching for a lie.

"That was you? Why didn't you show yourself?"

You look at him solemnly before turning away.

"John. Humans can't know about us. We've been hunted for thousands of years. Our wings pulled off, tortured, beaten. So now we erase the memories from the human we save. It's safer for us that way."

You face him again, and step forward, standing toe to toe. His broad chest is almost as large as your wings, and you feel your heart pull.

You press a finger to his temple. You show him in his mind every time you've saved him and his team.

"You forget me every time." You say sadly.

His eyes widen as he sees everything in his mind, every time you saved him and his team... he watches the memories, the moments when you appeared out of nowhere and saved them, just to disappear again without a trace...

He feels a mix of anger, shock, and even a hint of sadness as he sees these memories, and as you say the words "You forget me every time", he feels something break within him...

He stands there, his mind racing as he tries to process everything he just saw... He looks at you, his expression softening slightly as he speaks in a quiet, almost pained tone...

"You... You've been there all along... Saving us, looking out for us, and we just forgot about you...?"

"That's the deal, John. Keeps us all safe. Keeps you safe."

He takes a deep breath, his expression conflicted as he gazes down at you. He feels a mixture of anger, sadness, and guilt...

He speaks quietly, his voice low and filled with emotion...

"And you just expect me to forget about you again...? Just act like you don't exist...? How can I do that...?"

"I've been saving you for years, John." You reply, your voice quiet and soft, almost as of you were going to cry at any moment.

He lets out a low, frustrated sigh as he hears your words... Years. You've been saving him for years, and he never knew...

*He shakes his head, his expression still conflicted and pained...*

"Years... And I never knew... I never knew that an angel was watching over me i had you... Protecting me..."

He stands there in silent contemplation, his mind filled with the memories you showed him, the knowledge that you've been saving him for years...

He glances at you, his eyes dark and conflicted... He wants to say something, anything, but he can't find the right words....

"You know, Ghost was the hardest one. Those demons almost had him. But I brought back to you."

He nods,remembering when Ghost was brought back to base after everyone was convinced he had died.

"I have a question." He states, tugging his vest on.

"What if I say no."

"No?" You prompt, frowning.

"Don't erase my memories, love." He asks, a pleading tone to his deep voice.

"Don't make me forget you." He continues.

He leans in, close enough for you to smell the musk of his cigar on his collar.

He brings a hooked finger under your chin, making your eyes lock to his.

"I can keep you safe. My team can keep you safe. Don't do this." He begs, his eyes searching yours for an a answer.

You close your eyes, pulling out of his grasp.

"I have-"

"You don't! Think about this, love." He says quietly, as if he's about to detonate an emotional bomb. Raising his hands, he closes the gap between you.

"Why me, love?" He asks gruffly.

"Why not you, John?" You reply easily.

At his frown, you sigh, your shoulders relaxing a little.

"Russia." You admit.

His body stilled. The mission in Russia was the worst one of John's career. He went through every torture method possible, and still came home.

"I heard you praying. But you weren't praying for yourself, you were praying for your team, for Ghost, for Gaz, even for Soap." You chuckle.

"So I saved you. This amazing man who in the last flutters of life, was selfless and wanted nothing more than his team to be okay."

"I grew attached to you, and the team. The relief I felt when I found each one of you alive. It's started because they were all important to you. Then they became family."

"Then why erase our memories, we can help you." John asks again.

"I trust you boys like family, but it's the rest of the human world we can't trust." You explain.

John steps forward, his broad shoulders almost as wide as your wings. His voice rumbles in his chest as he trails a finger over the edge of your wings.

"Give me a day. If you feel anything that threatens your life, I give you permission to erase my memories of you."

"This is unheard of." You caution, concern marring your features.

"Then let's make history together." He says, his hand on your shoulder.

You nod, and you soon find yourself in a room back on base, with three very shocked faces.

"Steamin' Jesus! An Angel?" You hear a thick Scottish brogue exclaim.

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

I MAY HAVE TO DO A PART TWO!

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