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sudeikisfms · 9 months ago

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LITTLE TALKS: Self para

Upon his return from Fiji, Jason has something very important to share with Otis and Daisy. No CW apply but it did get a bit wordy so sorry about that. @klossehills

“I have something very important to tell you both, okay?”

Jason looked at his children, he had opted to do this alone so they wouldn’t feel as if they were being ganged up on but now they were staring at him with expectant expressions he was the one who felt like he was going cornered. His eyes darted between the two of them as he tried to figured out their reactions, the last time they had both been sat down with that sentence it was years ago and mom and dad were breaking up.

This was happier news at least.

“While we were in Fiji—“

“Are you having a baby?” Daisy interrupted abruptly.

Jason frowned and studied her face “No.”

“Oh.” Her immediate reply might’ve been mistaken for disappointment. His eyes scanned her features again for any hints but she gave him nothing. Would a baby have been better news?

“While we were in Fiji,” he started again, “on Valentine’s day, I asked Karlie to marry me. She said yes, but not only that we decided to get married that day.” Still nothing. “It was a very private ceremony, we didn’t even know the witnesses, we haven’t told anybody—“ His thoughts were cut short when Daisy’s chair legs squealed on the hard floors as she pushed herself back away from the table and wordlessly got up from her seat and left. “Dais. Daisy!” Her feet got further away as she scurried upstairs and slammed the door closed.

Jason sat back in his chair and looked at Otis who was looking at him like he didn’t know what to say. His eyes narrowed a little, trying to get into his mind, wondering if he said anything else then he might get out of his seat and slump off too. “What are you thinking?” Jason asked, unable to break past his son’s beautiful golden locks and see into the thoughts inside his head.

Otis was older, he perhaps had more understanding, Jason thought. The boy’s throat throat bobbed as he swallowed and he looked down at his hands as he fiddled anxiously with his fingers, “Do we have to call her Mom?”

Jason took a breath and pursed his lips together as Otis gave him a clue as to why Daisy might’ve been upset. Did she think Olivia was getting replaced somehow? They did their best to make their situation as normal as possible, but in such a short space of time Jason had moved in with Karlie and her boys and when Daisy and Otis visited they stayed there too, and after just a few months of dating he was announcing to them that he had eloped in a foreign country without them. Of course the whole thing was selfish. Daisy was right to be upset. “You call her whatever you’d like to, dude. If you want to then that’s something you’d have to discuss with Karlie, but if you want to keep calling her Karlie then that’s okay too.”

A silence hung between them and Jason waited for the outburst that never came. He couldn’t figure out if Otis was upset or delighted by the news, but he could see he was processing it. After a few seconds had passed, Otis got out of his chair and his father prepared for him to head in the same direction as his sister but he didn’t; he walked around the table and put his arms around the larger man, resting his head on his shoulder. “I like Karlie,” Otis admitted “I like you happy.”

Jason’s nose scrunched but he didn’t mean to look so disgusted. It was just that he was trying to stop himself from tearing up at something so innocent sounding so grown up with just a few simple words. “You should talk to Daisy.” Otis suggested. Jason’s head nodded in agreement and he kissed Otis’ forehead “I should talk to Daisy.” “Can I go outside and play?” “Course you can. Thank you. If you need to talk you’ll come and find me, yeah?” Otis nodded, already making his way out of the room. “If you’re playing with your soccer ball keep it away from the windows! Otis!”

“Away from the windows!”

Jason mumbled a thank you under his breath as he rose up off his seat and turned to head towards the stairs to find Daisy. The incline seemed so much steeper when he didn’t know what kind of reception he would get at the top of it. Each stair was taller than the last, the air thinner and thinner as he got closer to the top, and when he got to the top he turned to see how far above sea level he was. Not very much at all, but it felt like it. He had mastered the art of walking across a hallway in silence with socked feet, and moved with surprising stealth for a man his size towards Daisy’s room. He didn’t know if it was his shadow under the door that gave him away, or if his seven year old had the hearing of a bat but before he had the chance to knock, the door opened just a fraction and her little arm extended and placed one of her stuffed animals on the ground in front of him before she abruptly closed the door as quick as it had opened.

Jason looked down at the pastel purple bunny, it’s head lulled to one side, it’s arms lame by its side as it’s stuffing had begun to clump together inside it from almost four years of being a best friend, one of it’s comically large ears covered it’s face. “Hello Timothy,” As expected the stuffy didn’t respond, and nor did Daisy on the other side of the door, “What are you doing?”

“As Miss Sudeikis’ lawyer, I’m issuing cease and desist.” Daisy replied from the other side of the door but not in her voice. Jason put his hand over his mouth and tried not to laugh, tried to compose himself. “My client doesn’t want to talk to you.” His hand fell to his side, “What if I came back with ice cream?” He regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth, bribery wasn’t ideal parenting but Daisy not talking to him and setting her lawyers on him was worse. Desperate times and such. The door opened but just enough to snatch the bunny back, and it closed for a few seconds. Jason waited patiently while Daisy discussed the new terms with her lawyer, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he thought fondly about how imaginative she was, and how funny she was, and how he was so grateful she was his. His thoughts were cut short when Timothy reappeared and the door was closed once more. Jason straightened his back as if trying to make himself look a bit more presentable in front of him, as if that might help his case. “My client accepts on the condition you bring an Oreo.” “Just one?” Jason’s brow creases, because a child bargaining and asking for a single Oreo hardly seems plausible. “One. And the ice cream.”

He waits a moment, expecting more clauses but none come and he retreats back down the mountain to get the ice cream and one single Oreo, he’s tempted to bring two - bribery at it’s finest - but he worries that two might be some kind of breach of contact and he’ll be held in contempt by Ballerina mouse and Sidney the cat. Daisy waits too. She waits until she knows he’s gone and she opens the door and takes her stuffy back. When Jason comes back he sits on the floor in front of her bedroom door and knocks on it quietly. As expected, she opens it, takes the ice cream and closes the door again but a quiet “Thank you” comes from the other side and that’s definitely Daisy’s voice.

Jason let his head rest on the door frame and let out a quiet sigh through his nose. “I’m sorry I upset you, squiggle.” Silence. “I’m not going to ask you to tell me why you’re upset, but it’s important that you know you can talk if you need to.” Silence. “Feelings are like mushrooms, if you keep them in the dark for too long they get bigger. Please don’t keep big feelings inside.”

There was another second or two of silence then the door opened carefully. Daisy was sitting in front of him with a bowl of ice cream in her lap and her lawyer sitting beside her. The way she looked up at him with her expressive brown eyes, he saw so much of himself in her. She was infinitely more beautiful in his opinion but she was all him. He melted immediately when she looked at him like that, he would’ve given her anything, he was wrapped right around her finger. “What happened, Daisy?” Jason pressed the question. Daisy fussed with her ice cream like she’d suddenly lost all appetite for it then set it down in front of Timothy rabbit as if offering it to him to finish. “Do you think I’m replacing Mommy?” She shakes her head and shrugs. It’s a non-answer he can’t decipher. “Are you upset because you weren’t there?” She shakes her head and shrugs again. “Baby—““I don’t want you to go anywhere.” The admission is quiet. So quiet Jason barely hears it. He reaches over the threshold to take her hand, it’s cold and wet from the ice cream bowl so he wraps his other hand around it in an attempt to bring some warmth back to it, “Where am I going? I’m not going anywhere sweet girl, this doesn’t change how things were. Just a few words. We’re still going to live here, you and Otis are still going to split visits between here and your Mom’s. You are one of my most favourite things in the whole wide world, I hate being away from you. I promise you: you and me, we got the rest of our lives together girl.” He smiled, and Daisy smiled too. “Are we cool?”

Daisy thought about this question as she took back the Oreo from the bowl of slowly melting ice cream, shaking off the drips and twisting the two halves apart. She studied which of the two halves had the most cream and gave that half to her father and he accepted it with a thankful smile, “You know you’re always going to be my girl don’t you? No matter how big you get, you’re my number one. And-“ he took a small nibble of the cookie in his hand from the small corner of it that had ice cream on it, “-I’m pretty sure Karlie likes you. And your brother. Hm? I don’t think she’s going to turn into a wicked step mother like in Cinderella.” He lunged forward to tickle her and she erupted into laughter and tried to push him away “Clean the floors Daisy-Jo, wash the dishes Daisy-Jo!” He mocked, then stopped his teasing before she choked. “Otis is outside if you want to go play with him. Don’t tell him you had ice cream before dinner though.” The young girl stood up and on her way by she wrapped her arms around Jason’s neck “Love you, dada.” She mumbled against him, “I’m sorry I got upset.” Jason shook his head and pulled back to look at her, “Your feelings aren’t something you need to say sorry for, sweet girl. Don’t you ever. I love you.”

Daisy ran outside happily to join her brother. Jason imagined they’d gossip about the whole thing, and he’d let them stay outside and have their privacy until they were ready to come inside. Daisy did, in fact, boast about having ice cream before dinner.

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niklaus-no-mans-son-blog · 8 years ago

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Stay, Little Valentine, Stay

Who: Camille && Niklaus Where: Cupid’s Nest, where all the unfortunate speed-daters have flocked When: February 14, 2017, early evening. What: Our star-crossed lovebirds can’t seem to leave, but don’t know how to ask each other to stay.

Klaus: He watched Damon move along, feeling fonder of Valentine's Day than he had...probably since it had become a commercialized holiday. Before that, he couldn't honestly recall if it had ever made it on his radar. He usually did away with all of the trappings of the Christian tradition, unless it served him well. Today, it seemed to be serving him well indeed...Or, perhaps not? Camille took the seat opposite him, and he held on to his smug countenance by sheer force of will, and centuries of affected habituation. "Camille," he said, shooting for a confident tone, but perhaps the edges were a bit softer than he had intended. "It seems the third time really is the charm."

Cami: So far so good , Cami thought as she left Stefan's table in search of her third date for the evening. Her only regret so far was in not managing to rope Uncle K into the festivities, even through a classic guilt trip sheer power of will. Neither of them entertained the possibilities of romance in their respective lives, but this event had still managed to lift her spirits to the degree she'd wished for him too. And anyway, he-

But the blonde's thoughts came to an abrupt halt when she found number 82 - only to glance down at the man occupying the table.

Klaus.

- What was he doing here?!? ... Dating. People date, Cami. ... Right . -

She sucked in her breath and reached blindly for the chair, eyes running over his features before her own settled into a complacent smile. And damn it, his automatic charisma tugged that smile a little wider than she would've liked, considering the circumstances. Still, she had her words. "Betcha they don't say that one to people who've been struck by lightning..." A split-second pause. "Nice to see you, Klaus. And happy Valentine's Day."

Klaus: He hated it, the way his chest felt tighter when Cami smiled at him. So mundane. Yet he couldn't help himself but to answer it with genuine pleasure of his own. Damn her. "And yet I feel no compunctions. You should know I spent the entire last three minutes planning how best to stab my last date, so you are an incredible improvement," he quipped, not kidding in the slightest. Then again, Camille would be an improvement over anything with a heartbeat (or without, but naturally that went without saying). He hesitated, suddenly feeling the weeks between their last meeting gape between them, before starting up again. "I...apologize for not inquiring after you following the earthquake." Another somewhat awkward pause. "I had a difficult time locating my siblings and I'm afraid that took most of my attention." It seemed a paltry excuse, especially considering he was mainly referring to the sibling, in an eternal coma in a coffin, whom he had put there, and could no doubt last another day without much bother, but it was, nonetheless, true. Still, he found he wasn't satisfied with it, seeing her now, rosy-cheeked and smiling at him.

Cami: Cami shifted in her seat to get comfortable and fought a grin at his words. "Well you know what they say; the course of true love never did run smooth . Maybe that's a good sign; maybe you're due for some good karma any day now." Or any date now, She thought to herself quietly, though it didn't leave her lips. Instead, she waved away his apologies about not checking in on her after the Earthquake. "Oh, please, we're not- you don't owe me anything like that..." It came out a little tightly, as she thought of the last time they'd seen each other - and rushed to keep talking. "Are your siblings okay? Elijah?" Cami asked, pulling out the name of the one brother she'd met in person. It was true that she'd harboured no particular expectation that Klaus should think of her safety while New Orleans was in in the midst of a natural disaster; but if there was any reservation in her tone it was due to the weeks before the Earthquake and since their last meeting. He hadn't returned her calls, hadn't scheduled any therapy sessions... Fallen off her grid entirely.

That's what you get when you dance with your client to Aretha Franklin in your goddamn pajamas, another voice in her head reproached her stoically.

Klaus: We're not... Klaus' smile shuttered and like any coward, he sought refuge in the glass, brow furrowing just slightly at the implications. Of course they weren't. That was precisely why he had avoided her so avidly these past weeks. The sense memory of her falling into his arms, head thrown back in laughter sometimes caught him unawares, out of the blue, though, and he would find himself wondering if they could be. Ridiculous. Shortsighted. Selfish, even. No, they were not. "Elijah had fortunately left town on business just before the earthquake struck, and to my utter regret, Rebekah and Kol are well enough to cause me endless grief. "You did escape unharmed, though...? Your uncle was it? Your building...?" That he had actually taken care of personally. It had been the perfect opportunity to make her unfortunate landlord disappear, and the property had quite fortunately gone up for sale. Camille now had a rent-controlled apartment, information which she was unaware of, but really, it was superfluous information anyway.

Cami: "Every- everyone and everything's fine... Thank you." She replied gently, "Church has seen better days, but it's nothing a little bit of charitable campaigning can't fix. And considering that's the worst of it, I'd say we got off easy." Cami nodded before letting out a chuckle when Klaus acknowledged that Kol and Rebekah were around to cause him 'endless grief'. In the wake of such a disaster, they were - all of them - the lucky ones. But then the conversation tapered off and a few seconds' worth of semi-awkward silence elapsed between them. Cami hastened to fill it.

"So if you're afraid that I'm about to psychoanalyze you over some Bordeaux, fear not, I know how to pick my battles." Smiling, the blonde reached for one of the two empty wine glasses that sat between them before pouring some of the red for him. "Wanna play twenty questions, or do you wanna wing this?" She added, nodding towards the stack of cue-cards meant to help the conversation along between strangers, before setting the glass down in front of him.

Klaus: Klaus just looked at her for a second, wondering how they had gotten to a place where there couldn't even pass three minutes together without help. It hurt in a slow, aching sort of way that seemed to spread as if his silent heart was pumping it through his body, a little bit with every few seconds that passed. "Twenty questions. I'll start." His voice was uncharacteristically unreadable, short, but not hard. Not quite abrupt, but not forgiving either. Another beat of silence, his glass of bourbon, the single most important prop he had had today, was now discarded, forgotten but for the tap of his fingers against the rim as he considered. She looked... catching. He wouldn't use words like "beautiful" or "stunning" to describe her, though she was both. There was something more to her that defied his extensive vocabulary. Defied description at all. And he found he really didn't know what to ask her. Have you missed me? Did you enjoy our dance? Did you know I spend most nights on a rooftop four buildings down from yours making sure your sleep isn'd disturbed? Will you please New Orleans and not return? Will you remember me? "And for you...? Is third time the charm for your today?"

Cami: She was pouring some of the Bordeaux into her own glass when he alluded to her other two set-ups today. Yes The answer was instant, instinctive as she watched the last two drops of alcohol drop into her glass, creating little ripples before replacing the cork on the bottle. "I can't complain; haven't wanted to kill anybody yet... Present company included." A sly, stolen glance at him before she let her eyes fall preferentially to the cue card he was holding between two fingers. There was a tension between them; too many unspoken somethings , and she didn't want to be the first to acknowledge it - lest it give him extra motive to keep his distance when this date was over.

Why are you avoiding me? Do you think I was unprofessional? Who do you talk to? How've you been lately, really been ?...

Cami gulped down a sip of her wine before reaching for a cue-card herself. "If you were an animal in the wild, which would you choose to be?" What the hell; might as well burn through the cue cards while the clock was ticking...

Klaus: That deep pulsing ache in his chest abates as they finally make eye contact. Her words give him hope, albeit not much. Still, not wanting him dead is a head start he doesn't usually have. "High praise," he murmurs, but his lips curl around the edges of the words in faint amusement. She read off the cue card and Klaus frowned in distaste. Such an absurd question. What would this tell her about him? "In the wild, hm? How interesting they don't allow for anything domesticated," he remarked, an ironic eyebrow raising in amusement. Domestic, he was not. Another reason why it was essential he stop this madness and send her on her way, before he got her even more entangled in a world she didn't understand. But don't change a hair for me, not if you care for me...

A wolf, was the thought that entered his mind before he had even managed to get the other words out. He bit them back, unsettled by the fierceness with which they had overtaken him. The overwhelming sense of rightness. But he bit them back, because such an answer was too raw. "Fine. An undomesticated cat then. Some panther or jaguar. I like to imagine I have the same sort of laconic charm." And equally sharp teeth. He picked up a card and didn't even bother pretending to read it. "How do you feel about modeling?"

Cami: If there’s even just the hint of a smile tugging at his lips, Cami’s quick to take note of it. There’s something about that smile that makes her willing – so willing, to let bygones be bygones; to forget the missed calls, the unanswered messages, the s p a c e . Weeks from now, months perhaps, she’ll realize that that blind-eye willingness is where the problem began; and that she is as much to blame in this – whatever ‘this’ is – as he. But hindsight is 20/20 and right now, right at this very moment, all she feels is a little lighter. So when she catches his subsequent frown from her peripheral as she reads her question, Cami ignores it decidedly. “Panther, huh?... How come? And while we’re on it, are you telling me your spirit animal would be a tabby cat if the question wasn’t so specific?” She grins, setting the cue-card aside. “I’d be a bird… Not for the whole wings of freedom thing .” She adds quickly, “Because of the vantage point… They see the world from the outside, see the whole picture..” The blonde trails off, flicking through the cue-cards in search of another as Klaus asks his own question.

There’s a laugh, a roll of her eyes despite her amusement. “Ready and willing. Problem isn’t how I feel, it’s finding an audience. I haven’t googled ‘Miss Delusion 2017’ so I’ve still got a shot.” The blonde shakes her head at him, takes another quick sip of her wine before clearing her throat. “What quality is most important to you in a partner?”

Klaus: "I rather like to imagine myself on the top of the food chain. Plus, they are rather majestic creatures. I should think the metaphor is obvious, Camille," he drawled, humor seeping through into his words. He couldn't very well tell her he was that the top of the food chain, all of them in fact, and the majority of the comparison was based on their respective lethality. He couldn't help but read into her own choice. "So... you prefer distance? Keeping things–" people? "–at an arm's length?" Perhaps that was why he could practically feel the tension hovering between them. He had given her the distance she desired, and now that distance was forfeit. "Easy. Willingness to model for me. I paint, Camille. I wasn't asking about the industry, it was a more personal inquiry," he said rolling his eyes, albeit fondly.

Cami: "I doubt the bottom-feeders share your respect," She teased, mouth curving into a grin upon catching his eye-roll. "Somehow, I can't picture a gazelle looking up into the jaws of Death and thinking 'wow, that's goals right there... So majestic."

Still, there's something about the way he speaks... The tone, the cadence, the way he chooses his words... She's always made for a rapt listener, but when it comes to Klaus it's effortlessly captivating. And so, the last bit of tension unwinds itself in her chest as the female leans back in her chair; content to watch him as he thought, as he spoke. "No! Not distance, I just... I just want to see it all simultaneously... Eagle-eye view. When you're on the same footing as everything else, you just see what's directly in front of you. Kinda like a horse with blinders. I wanna see the whole picture... All of it."

But Klaus leaves her second question unanswered and instead presses his own. And at that, Cami levels him with a deadpan look as if to say "really?" But when his own expression remains expectant and unchanged, her own facade begins to falter. "Seriously, Michelangelo?? Why me?" And she tries to play it off casual, but the way her eyes slide back to the glass between her fingers, the slight uptick in her heartbeat - indicate it's no such thing.

Klaus: "You'd be surprised," Klaus murmured in response, lips quirking secretively. Danger was seductive, and he had no problem making use of it. When the stakes (for him) were low, anyway. In situations like this, however, he couldn't help but make certain blonde bartenders with a knack for being in the wrong place at the right time, the gazelle in this situation. This did not leave a nice taste in his mouth. "Have you ever thought about whether or not you'd like what it was you found?" It was a serious question; one he had spent perhaps too much time thinking about, and one he was relatively sure Camille didn't take seriously enough.

Why her? It was such a ridiculous question, Klaus refused to entertain it. "That counts as two additional questions, Camille." His grin continued to grow, his pleasure at the idea growing the more he thought of it. It had burst forth without much forethought, but now that it was in his mind, it had taken root. Of course, he didn't actually need her to sit for him in order to paint her, perhaps in oil crayon, or no– pastels rather, something soft and complicated and too easily smeared by a careless heavy hand. "Wouldn't be long depending on the medium. A sketch would take maybe twenty minutes. Less even." He wanted to tell her he could make it up to her, buy her dinner, buy her a city, anything she wanted. But he wouldn't. She would not get dinner with him, and he would not ask. He knew how this story ended, and Cami deserved more.

Cami: The mischievous smile that mirrored his, dimmed a fraction when Klaus asked whether she'd ever considered the possibility of not liking what she discovered about the world through that newfound perspective. "Aaah... No. Not really, I guess. Isn't it always better to know?" She asked, her mind inevitably traveling to Sean. "Facts are facts, no matter what I think of them. Better to know than bury my head in the sand, right?" She didn't know why she sought the answer in his expression, but it only lasted so long before her own solemnity melted back into a smile.

Why Klaus would want to paint such a commonplace subject was well beyond her, and yet still, Cami couldn't deny that she felt a little flattered. And she hoped the colour rising in her cheeks could equally be attributed to the red wine, as to the request she was still turning over in her mind.

- What the heck; what was the worst that could come from it? - Unprof-essional... Another voice in her head sing-songed. - Excuse to get into his headspace. [i/] The first corrected.

Downing the last of her wine, Cami set the glass back on the table, decisively. " Fine. I make no promises, but I'll consider it... How's that?" Her eyes danced with merriment as she continued. "Only if you answer my last question though... Then maybe I'll let you draw me like one of your French girls. " She deadpanned with a grin.

Klaus: Klaus simply looked at her, incredible in her naiveté. In the world in which he lived, knowing inevitably made people dead, with very few exceptions, and even those would get there soon enough. How marvelous, how quaint, it must be for her to live in a world where knowledge actually did equal power. "Perhaps, for those who can afford it, ignorance actually can be bliss." He doubted Cami would count herself among those who could afford it, but she underestimated herself. Or perhaps overestimated herself.

He answered her grin as she laid out her terms. He couldn't resist the chance to throw her off balance once more. His mixed signals couldn't have been stronger or more contradictory. It truly was best for her if he stayed away, and he had but it seemed Cupid had other plans because he had dropped her practically in his lap (he could not deal with that particularly mental image) and he had never been a model of self-restraint in the face of temptation. "I'd like to remember your face," he said simply, knowing how much weight those words carried. One way or another, if it took a day, a year or eighty, they would leave one another behind, and a simple painting would be all he had left to remember her by.

Cami: Cami couldn't help the way her features scrunched up into a visible - if somewhat childish - grimace at his words. "God, I don't think I've ever known an expression that I hated more than that one." She would've said more, but decided at the last moment that this wasn't the time and place for such a rant. "... Just- do me a favour and don't use that one on me, okay?" Not that he would if he was ever of a mind to continue their sessions; after-all, therapy was exactly the kind of place where one generally opened up. As usual, the faintest smile on his part only incited the brightest, most unabashed grin from her. It was an instinct she couldn't quite help; the muscles around her mouth were tugged up to mirror his as though connected by a string. "Take a picture; it'll last you longer. You still haven't answered my question, by the way. Most important quality in a prospective partner?" Cami wiggled the cue-card she was still holding between two fingers. "Asking for a friend," The blonde added, mirth dancing in her eyes. "Goodness knows you'll need all the help you can get, Picasso."

Klaus: It was uncomfortable, and entirely unwanted, the inkling of guilt he felt hearing that. Don't use that one on me. He comforted himself with the knowledge that it was a luxury only the blissfully ignorant would ask for. If she knew what she was asking, she would want the freedom of a night's sweet dreams, of living her life without fearing for it every moment of every day. He was sparing her. She would thank him, if she knew. He frowned in earnest as she insisted he didn't answer her question. Were he not utterly unflappable, he might have blushed at the information he had just given away, and freely at that. Perhaps his cheeks were a bit warm. He scowled and drank his bourbon. "Picasso was rather something of a womanizer," he pointed out wryly as he considered her question, yet another question he dearly wanted to avoid. What was most important to him in a prospective partner? The idea of a partner at all seemed rather daunting... so abstract he couldn't honestly imagine it. You make me smile with my heart. Partnership... what a strange word to use to refer to romance. And yet, he could see the appeal. Trust, camaraderie, intimacy, reciprocity... "Loyalty, I suppose," he answered, making his voice deliberately bored as he lounged in his seat, swirling the damned glass of bourbon he couldn't bring himself to finish. Loyalty sounded so... distant. So cold. And yet, what else did he really want? What else was of any use to him?

Cami: "Is that where the similarities begin or where they end between Klaus and Pablo?" Cami fired back, before she could think to filter it. She blamed it on the alcohol; whereas her date had barely touched his drink, she'd leaned on it like a crutch. And if not for slowing the racing thoughts in her mind, then the glass served as something with which to occupy her hands as she listened to him.

Still, Cami wished it was a notebook in her hand instead, and that it was appropriate to scribble his answers down for safe-keeping. Would she remember them later?... Loyalty . The simplicity of his answer surprised her. And she wanted to pry, to ask him about it but was deterred by the absolute disinterest in his body-language. Afraid that she was losing him, Cami took another quick sip of her drink before tossing the cue-cards aside on the table.

"Okay, you win. And I'll bite, so- " But the sound of a buzzer cut her off mid-sentence and made her look up in surprise, before her gaze dropped back down to meet Klaus' a few seconds later. "... Saved by the bell?" Cami suggested, with a wistful smile.

Klaus: "You tell me, Camille," he fired back before reticence had the chance to stop him. Honestly, Fate was testing his patience. He hadn't must practice being good but he was trying for this ridiculous woman, trying to keep her away from his own ill-advised desires, and she kept talking to him. What was he supposed to do with that? Compel her to never open her mouth again? She was insufferably charming.

He couldn't decide if the buzzer was a curse or a godsend. It seemed the more time he spent in her company, the harder it was to remember why it was absolutely essential that he avoid her at all costs, and yet, he burned to know what she was going to say next. "Me, or you?" he quipped, quite seriously, already knowing the answer. Still, he paid no attention to the next person lining up to sit across from him as he stood. "I think I shall spare St. Valentine's victims my company for the rest of the evening." I need to leave. You need to leave. One of us should go. Let me walk you home. Dance with me, Camille.

Cami: “I wouldn’t know.” She answered just as quick, holding his gaze level. It didn’t come off as bitter as she’d felt on the onset of the conversation, but there was still enough meaning tucked away behind those words. A ‘gotcha’ of sorts.

Give me a chance to figure you out. Give me a c h a n c e .

But the therapist had a much more definitive answer when he asked whether the buzzer was saving him - or her. “You. I was just about to get the big guns out. You know; marriage and baby names.” Cami teased, although it was far from the truth. When she’d put aside those cue cards it was in order to take the plunge; address the elephant in the room - address the missed calls, the distance. But the buzzer had robbed her of her courage in one, fell swoop.

You.

“Anyway, I should- yeah, I- me too.” A quick nod, a smile as she wondered how exactly they were supposed to part. A handshake seemed stupid, and yet the repercussions of a hug seemed twice as stupid. “Besides, speaking of Casanovas…” Her gaze roamed towards one side of the room, where she’d locked eyes with Marcel not too long before the third round. A broad grin, a wink on his part. “There’s this guy . Marcel . More likely to hold a karaoke mic than a paintbrush but no less persistent.” Despite her sarcasm, Cami’s smile was fond as she watched him chatting up some blonde, whose face was obscured from her vantage point. Her eyes snapped back to meet Klaus’ unreadable grays. “I think I’ll disappoint him a little while longer. Are you heading out?”

Klaus: Her quick riposte caught him off-guard, and he found it difficult to break her gaze. When he finally did look away, it felt like an actual splintering, a cracking in his soul. I wouldn't know. And wasn't that exactly how he wanted it? Well done, mate, mission accomplished then. He snorted as she followed it up with marriage, of all things. "Marriage is a bit fast, don't you think, love? This was only our second date after all," he said, eyes locking back on hers, brow raised, anticipating the challenge. For a second, he thought she'd actually bite, and then...

"Marcel?" A hot flash of slick, oily envy washed over him, catching in a quick clench of his jaw. First his sister, then his city, and now his... stenographer? Teeth grinding, finger tapping against his leg, he thought quickly. No, this was good. He could use this. To escape from his own ridiculous sentimentality, which was already proving to be a weakness, and to get the upper hand on Marcel, from the area he'd expect it to come from the least. In a flash he had Cami whisked into the small side room where guests were invited to store their jackets for the duration of the event. "Actually, Camille, you won't disappoint Marcel Gerard any longer," he intoned, watching her eyes dilate as the compulsion wove its magic in her mind. "The next time he makes an advance, you will encourage him, and eventually accept." It was better this way, wasn't it? At least it was on his terms, now. He controlled this, he decided this. Camille couldn't walk away from him if she never had the chance. "You will report to me any information you learn from him about his rule of New Orleans, about the witch Davina, and what he has planned? You will tell no one of this, and you will not remember I asked this of you. Do you understand, Camille?"

Cami: “Hey, one date would’ve been enough to shock and scandalize most of my ancient ancestors...Yours too. Count yourself lucky.” A wink, as she got out of her seat and contemplated - for a second time - her goodbye. Handshake? Probably a stupid handshake. But he mentioned Marcel just as she went to offer him her hand. “Yeah, you know him? He’s-”

But before she could choose a fitting adjective, Klaus had grabbed her without a second’s notice and whisked her into the adjoining coatroom. “What are you-...” But then her voice trailed off as she looked up at him, the green of her irises all but disappearing as her pupils dilated. Seventeen seconds later, she nodded faintly, solemn and wide-eyed.

But in a blink, the order was forgotten, and Cami glanced around at her whereabouts before turning her gaze back onto Klaus in surprise. “Wow, sorry! I’m eager to get out, but I didn’t mean to chase your tail in here... Don’t flatter yourself.” She added, full lips twisting up into a grin although it didn’t fully reach her eyes. How quickly had she moved?? Goodness. Looking around, Cami spotted her blue coat and moved towards it. “So!... When will I be seeing you next?” She ventured, aiming for nonchalance as she dragged her coat off of its hook.

Klaus: He could see confusion in her eyes and ran his tongue over his teeth to rid his mouth of his distaste. It was done. Still, her next words through him off, and he hesitated, mouth opening to respond but finding that he didn't actually know how to answer. He couldn't let this charade of flirtation continue on, not when it wasn't a charade, not for him. And especially not when he had just delivered her into Marcel's waiting arms. And association with him would become suspect, and the thought of seeing her with Marcel... the distaste refused to be removed this time by a simple swipe of the tongue. Knowing it would be the last time he allowed himself such a luxury, he reached out and stroked his thumb over her cheek, the tips of his fingers curling into her hair. A human wouldn't be able to feel the way her pulse beat beneath her skin, but he felt it in his bones, and committed it to memory. Then turned around and walked away, this time, not even taking the advantage of vampiric speed to create distance. No, this time, he counted every step.

#stay little valentine stay para #para #camille #vn speed dating #x: because the color of the wheat fields #i hate you and i hate me and i hate this #AND I HATE YOU TOO MARCEL THIS IS YOUR FAULT

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crimedawgbylaw · 3 years ago

Text

2021 FAVS

RAP SONGS

DJ Lucas - “Comfort of My Car”

Yeat - "Sorry Bout That”

42 Dugg - “Maybach (feat. Future)”

Pi’erre Bourne - “HULU”

Babyface Ray - “Real Niggas Don’t Rap”

Veeze - “A and W”

Peezy - “Build A Bear”

Capolow - “Unwind (feat. Cypress Moreno & Kalan.FrFr)”

Remble - “Rocc Climbing (feat Lil Yachty)”

RXKNephew - “American tterroristt”

Chicken Boyz - “Milwaukee Buckz”

Chicken P - “Money Counter”

Babyface Ray & YN Jay - “Rich Ugly MFS”

Rico Cartel - “2 Pills (feat Toosii)”

DJ Lucas & Papo2oo4 - “TLC”

Cico P - “Tampa”

Shordie Shordie - “Networth”

Bru-C - “Mesmerised”

Bootleg Baby - “Sleep Sleep Sleep”

Mariboy Mula Mar - “fly in”

Juice WRLD & Young Thug - “Bad Boy”

Midwxst - “Made It Back”

CEO Trayle & Babyface Ray - “Percocet Pain”

Mike Mike - “Go Down”

AlGotit - “Clover Letter 27”

Mach-Hommy - “Kriminel”

Meek Mill - “On My Soul”

Drakeo the Ruler - “Exclusive”

Pimpin Pat & 9ina - “Robbing Givens”

IUR Jetto - “Oh Boy (feat. Babyface Ray & Icewear Vezzo)”

Dawyonn - “Back Home”

Kankan - “X & Oxy (feat. Yeah)”

Stunnaman02 - “Big Steppin”

Smino - “Rice & Gravy”

Key! - “I Know”

Headie One - “Siberia (feat. Burna Boy)”

Larry June - “Intercepted (feat. Money Man)”

Shy Glizzy - “Ay Ay Ay (feat. 3 Glizzy)”

Moneymade Eli - “Ah Ah”

DB.Boutabag - “Mac Dre”

p4rkr - “and most importantly, have fun”

Monaleo - “Beating Down Yo Block”

Babytron & RMC Mike - “Dookie Season”

vamp leek - “Homicidal . Suicidal - Live”

Chief Keefe - Something I’m Best At”

Icewear Vezzo - “5 Mill”

Gabe ‘Nandez - “223”

6 Dogs - “When I Was a Baby”

Slayter & ABG Neal - “Royce”

Big Wan & Lil Trav - “Designer Drugs”

The chaos and absurdity of the beat on “Comfort of my Car”--my #1 rap pick--always brings to mind my continuing, frantic attempt at navigating the COVID-19 pandemic. But DJ Lucas sounds in control; undaunted, exuberant, hopeful? Makes me feel good. The only times I really remember forgetting about the pandemic involved smoking weed and listening to Lucas and Papo2oo4′s Dirty Designer. Babyface Ray, Yeat, and Veeze seem to be the best rappers right now, although Veeze didn’t release much this year. Mach-Hommy’s record was phenomenal. Big Wan in the 50th spot because it seems so senseless to “rank” his music. So much death this year, but his hit me harder than most.

NOT RAP

kmoe - “gloves”

A. G. Cook & Charli XCX - “Xcxoplex”

Pictureplane - “Avalance”

Caroline Polachek - “Bunny Is A Rider”

Blackwinterwells - “Omen”

dltzk - “52 blue mondays”

Erika de Casier - “Busy”

DJ Seinfeld - “Walking With Ur Smile”

PinkPantheress - “Last Valentines”

Linkin Park - “One Step Closer (100 Gecs Reanimation)”

Aventura & Bad Bunny - “Volvi”

Doja Cat - “Need to Know”

CIZA - Bank Notification (feat. DJ Maphorisa & Madumane)”

BR DA TIJUCA & MC Kevin o Chris - “Senta e Nao Para”

Club Eat - “Sticky”

RANDOM OLDER SHIT I FUCKED WITH

1. Vistoso Bosses - “Delirious” 3. Bad Boy Chiller Crew - “Don’t Watch That” 3. Sophie - “Reason Why” 4. Serani - “No Games” 5. Jacka - “Inhale The Dirt (feat. Kazi)” 6. Sophie B. Hawkins - “As I Lay Me Down” 7. Dramarama - “Anything, Anything” 8. Johnny J - “Love’s the Way” 9. laura les - “dumb pics” 10. Rich Kids - “100 Dollar Autograph (feat. Young Thug)” 11. UNIT KAI - “departure (feat. accounta)” 12. Arthur Russell - “A Little Lost” 13. Lil Keke - “Ballin in the Mix (Chopped and Screwed)” 14. Kid Trash - “The Music Tried to Play Me” 15. Jonny L - “Ooh I Like It - Original Sin” 16. Prefab Spout - “Bonny” 17. Luca Lozana & Mr. Ho - “2UBU (snare drum sound mix)” 18. Loose Ends - “Stay A Little While, Child” 19. TKZEE - “Mr. and Mrs. Fake (feat. Gwyza)” 20. Love Inc. - “You’re A Superstar”

#best rap #best music #favs #2021 #eoy #list #rap lists

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sunajax · 3 years ago

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babe ko happy valentine’s day

babe thank you because you always there for me, loving me unconditional and i love you.,

babe i know we argued sometimes but i the end of the day we always settled it,

i love you babe, you are my only one., i vow to love you,. and no matter what challenge might carry

us apart.. we always find our way back to each other,. pangarap ko babe ko (future wife ko), sexylove ko

mahal na mahal kita babe ko.,. happy valentine’s day..

finally!! tiwala lang babe magkakasama rin tayo.. dito na tayo mag celebrate sa wall ko.,. wait kita babe ko..ayyyyiiiie exited na ko babe ko na makasama ka,. magagawa din natin ang hindi na natin magawa.,.

pero pag legal na po tayo bothside i think babe baka naman tau na ang magsawa.,. thank you po sa lahat

lahat babe ko.,. suportahan na lang po natin ang isat-isa babe ko para mas lalo pa po natin mapagtibay

ang relasyon natin.,. nag papasalamat ako kay god kase ikaw yung special gift nia sa akin.,. babe ko

pasensya na minsan nagliligalig din ako babe ko, na mimiss lang po talaga kita,. salamat babe ko kase kahit tupakin ako andito ka paden sa tabi ko, hindi mo ko magawang iwanan, hindi ka nagbabago,..

para sayo babe ko di kita ipagpapalit sa iba kase mahal na mahal po kita.,.

sana pag na basa mo to.👋kahit busy ka😂👊 basahin mo padin to kahit paulit ulit hangang sa maumay kana sa ka kornehan ko😄😄babe ko..

haha d mo pa nasisimulan ako na yung kinikilig.. kahit araw araw ko man gawi to.ok lang mapasaya lng kita.,. pasenya na babe sa kadramahan ko kung baga. 😑 sasabihin mo nanaman dami kong alam😒😒. e sa gusto ko e. 😂 hmm paano ba to wag kang kiligin hah mainis ka nalang haha oa e. 😅 miss na miss na kita 😕 gusto kita ult makasama.ksi nga diba alam mo na. oh sya uumpisahan ko na pwede na tong ipadala sa mmk✉ 😂. sa kasweetan kong to pati kilikili mo namamawis na. 😂 oh sya. ehem.mahal kita kaya iintindihin kita ☺. kahit sobrang hirap na di tau legal bothside..

kahit nakakapagod na minsan. pero alam mo ba kahit na ganun 😏😪. hindi ko inisip na sumuko 😒. hindi ko inisip palitan ka. kasi nga mahal kita! 😂. alam mo ba yun? nakakainis at nakakatanga man isipin pero hinding hindi kita iiwan. kahit nagmumukha pa mang akong tanga sa ibang tao 😂.kahit ilang beses mo pa akong pinapaiyak tuwing nag aaway tayo (oops sory babe nadulas ako). titiisin ko ☺💔🙈. ayoko kasing mawala ka eh. wag ka sanang mainis kung masyado akong selfish 😅. gusto ko kasi akin ka lang. ayoko ng kaagaw. wag mo akong ipagpapalit sa iba ha?😂 i love you so much more babe 😍💘

i hope u appreciate my simple gift for you.🎁 wag kang kiligin jan simple lng yan haha tumigil ka!.😁 tapos😆 wedding na 👰⛪🙊🙉🙈😻😹 chos! *nangarap* yung sabi mong kapit lang ha👫 uo naman alangan bumitaw pa ako hahaha di na kita bibitawan. haha joke. kakapit ako as long as i can. as long as i love you

☺😊 be patient lang ha. kasi ako sobra sobra sobrang haba ng pasensya ko kahit na sarap mo ng batukan.😡hindi man ako kagwapohan atleast totoo ako sayo😊😄 sorry kasi minsan malandi ako 😠👊 kasi palagi mo nalang akong pinagseselosan😶😈😈 wag mo akong iwan kotong ka talaga sakin😛😂👊 hahah hah ha d joke lng babe😂😂✌ syempre hindi ko magagawa sayo yun😚😘 mamahal kita eh babe.😍👑 salamat sa pag iintindi sa ugali ko. 😅 thankyou din sa pag checheer up sakin tuwing down na down ako  at sasamahan mo pa ng pang aasar e. 😑 haha alam mo, syempre d mo pa alam ksi sasbihin ko pa lng . eto na 😁 even though we have our fights, we get pissed at each other and sometimes we just go off. but one things is for sure i never give up on you. 😗 💪ugh shit! english. ako na nosebleed 😨😧😂 haha mahal na mahal kita alam mo yun diba sabihin mong hindi... makakatikim ka talaga ng kotong 😂💪👊 tas kakagatin kita sa braso mo😁😁 tas may pahabol pang kurot sabay kiss😘😘😄😄 kasi pagktapos ko gawin yun babawi ka 😝😝😝😜 mababaliktad ang lahat ikaw na ang galit 😞😂 ikaw na ang mangbubugbog hahhha pero ang lakas mo talaga maki pagaway sakin💪👊😂 kagabi lang😱 kaya hindi ako napapagud sayo kasi ako kumukuha ng lakas babe😍👑

you are the reason why i became stronger. but still, you are my weakness. i promise not to go away if u promise to stay. 🔒 stay with me please just hold on. 🙏😔 bat kasi sobrang ganda mo. 😑 hahahaaa😁😁😚! yan naman talaga yung kanina mo pa hinihintay na sabihin ko wag kang ngumiti jan ngayon lang yan. ganda mo kasi. 😍 haha naalala ko tuwing nagmamayday ka pacute ka ng pa cute 😂

*kalog*nakakagigil lang e.😘😊. tuwang tuwa kana niyan? 😂 yang pang aasar mo na wagas at sagad alam ko naman na yun yung way mo para maging sweet. 😑 pero over na a👊 kiss nalang sa pisnge dapat 😂 oh baka d kana fucos sa pag-aaral niyan kakagatin nman kita😂 😍 a may bukas pa para makapagchat pa tayo. taposin mo to ha. 😙😘😚 ngayon lang ult ako magpopost ng ganitong long sweet message. 😀😁 i love you, i’m inlove with you 😍 and all your little things. hahaha english again!! mahihimatay kana niyan! 😅miss ko na yng kalog mo sakin e *mapagasar* uwi kana nga dito sa bahay para naman maakap ulit kita.,.hnd na ako magagalit! ang hirap lang kapag maganda ang gf mo daming nag hi/hello 👊 dami mang humahaliparot sau deretsyo lang ang tingin! 😡👀 at sakin lang ah! kung hindi naku! mananapak talaga ako. 💪😂 hahah😁😁👊! yung mga promises ha pakitupad pls! 😊 yung mga bilin ko ha. wag kalimotan matanda na ako pero hnd ulyanin alalahanin 😘. at kahit na minsan wla kang pasimtabe. nababalewala ako. ok lng matatag to. 😊 change for the better! but don’t change the whole you. stay sweet,carring, and masungit 😑😊. babe! akin ka lng puedi? haha sorry madamot ako e. 😊 ohh siya taposin ko na ng maisara mo na yang nakabuka😨😷 mong bunganga.😁😂🙈 ill always be here for you. to support you. i’ll always love you no matter how the world tries to separate us. 👊 i’ve never loved anyone the way i love you. your my other half. my love. my girlfriend. my happy ever after. you’re everything i have ever hope and wished for. thank god that you found me and i found you.  😍😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😚👉i love you babe muah😍😘

akala ko dati wala nang tatanggap sakin kase ganito ko pero hindi pala meron pa palang ikaw 👸❤ na mamahalin ako kung ano ako at tanggap ako thankyou. i just want you to say i love you with pure honesty is morethan enough ❤❤❤💕💓💑 muaahhhh 💋💋💋 trust makes us stronger together 💑👫👪❤ gusto ko lang ipagmalaki sa lahat ng makakabasa yung girlfriend kong walang katulad. una sa lahat at hindi sa huli happy valentine’s day charot hahahaha i love you babe😊😍😘 hindi ko alam pano i eexplain sayo kung gano kita kamahal because words aren’t enough to explain how much i do. uy kiligin ka jusme kahit araw araw ko man ginawa to at hindi ko inakalang ma’s mahaba pa to sa pagmamahal ko sayo. hahaha ang corny neto pero wala eh tinamaan ako sayo mahal kitang maligalig ka kaya ayan gusto ko malaman mo kung gano kita kamahal gusto kita mapangiti at mapasaya kahit hindi ako ganto, kahit anong klase ng kakornihan hahamakin ko para sayo (haneeep😂) sobrang thankful ako na pinakilala ka ni god sken. alam mo na rin naman yun walang nag akala na aabot tayo sa ganto imagine dati ang sinasabi nila hindi tayo tatagal pero now yung mga nagsabi nun nakailang jowa na but we’re still together. 😨😍😍 siguro isip isip ng mga yun wow sila pa din? hahaha. oo tayo pa din ❤ at hindi ko hahayaan na masayang yung kung ano mang meron tayo 😊 (walang papalag👊) ang dami na kaya nating pinagdaanan, ilang beses na din tayo muntik na tuluyang maghiwalay, sa huli tayo pa din talaga 😊❤ (hays inlove na inlove ka kasi sken pero its a tie ganun din naman ako sayo😊) alam kong napakaselosa mo, alam ko din na kung minsan napipikon kna sa ugali ko, alam ko na minsan sumosobra na pagiging insensitive ko at nasasaktan na kita pero hindi mo ako iniwan 😊 nagtiis ka. pinakisamahan mo ako ng maayos kahit madalas ang sarap ko ng sapakin. (di mo ko masapak kasi boss ka pero big boss ako. bwahaha) hindi mo ako binitawan kahit nung time na alam kong pwede mo akong iwan, sumosobra na ko pero ikaw natitiis mo. pag may topak ako damay ka pero napapakamot ka na lang ng ulo sabay tanong ng “anong gusto mo gawin ko abnuy ka” at syempre dahil abnormal ako papakantahin kita. papasayawin or pagtitripan tapos ikaw okay lang sayo. okay lang sayo kasi ang gusto mo lang naman ay ang makitang masaya ako. 💯😊😍 ang lakas makahaba ng hair nung feeling na alam ko at some point napagod ka pero kahit ganun nag stay ka 😍💋 every relationship has bumps but the ones that prosper are able to do so because they dont give up. ang dami nating away bago umabot ng isangbuwan. ilang beses ka nasaktan, ilang beses ako nasaktan, ilang beses tayong nagkasakitan, ilang beses tayong nahirapan pero ganun naman talaga diba? true love ain’t easy and easy ain’t true love 💘✔💯 ngayon mag-isang buwan na tayo next month tapos ngayon papakasalan na kita joke lang po 😊💋❤ hindi perfect yung relationship naten but i dont want a perfect relationship cause all i really need is a relationship with you. hindi ko kailangan ng perpekto ikaw lang ang kailangan ko. diba palagi kong sinasabi sayo na sayo lang ako hanggang bukas pati sa mga susunod na bukas. kahit gwapo ako (joke) papanindigan ko yan 😊 kung meron man akong hindi gagawin hindi kita bibigyan ng dahilan para iwan ako dahil hindi ko kayang mawala ka sken 😊 sorry kung masyado akong oa, at seloso ang ganda mo kasi kaya takot na takot akong mawala ka haha but i fell in love with you not for how you look, just for who you are 😍😊😘 so there’s this girl, and the way she laughs makes me smile, and the way she talks gives me butterflies, and everything about her makes me happy, and that is you, you are my one and only 😊 ang pagkamamahal ko sayo parang pabebe boy.. walang makakapigil 👊✋💯😛 kahit bigyan mo ko ng isang daang dahilan para iwan ka may isang dahilan para mag stay sayo at yun ay dahil mahal na mahal kita. hindi ko sasabihing mamamatay ako pag nawala ka gasgas na yun haha, pero seryoso pag nawala ka mawawalan ng saysay ang buhay ko. at pag inagaw ka hindi ako magpapakamatay dahil makakapatay ako (hahaha matakot na kayo mga bes 🐍🐍🐍) joke lang, masyad

first of all pota?!?!?! did u make this or what HAHAHA second of all ofc sayo lang ako yieeee pota gatekeeping HAHAHA,, geh nga give me 100 reasons why you love me HAHAHA tangina jae what is this AHAHHA the fact that i read it but pota i had a hard time kasi there was so much tagalog gago AHHAHA

#.mail #.jae

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sxpernovagirl · 4 years ago

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Conditional & Unconditional | Self Para

When: January 1994-January 1999

Where: Gwangju & Seoul, Korea; Auckland, New Zealand

Triggers: Teen Pregnancy, Depression

Featuring: Seon-Hee Kang-Mitchell & Jung Jin-Ho

The year was 1994. The Kang family restaurant was beginning to take off and while a then, 14 year old Kang Seon-Hee hated taking the train from Gwangju to Seoul every day for school, it was very well worth it when she met her friend, Jung Jin-Ho upon getting off the platform. Jin-Ho was a Seoul native, he was a city slicker to the core, knew everywhere around the city like the back of his hand. He was what made the trip all the more worth it. After school, they’d venture around together for an hour, picking different spots to eat and do homework before Seon-Hee would have to head back home. This was an everyday routine until the holidays, and they hung out even when the other was upset. Seon-Hee loved Jin-Ho’s adventurous spirit and sense of adventure. She was far too shy to ever try any of that.

At home, it was a different story for both of them. Seon-Hee was the youngest of three, while her parents made good money, most of it was used for the restaurant and for her and her siblings to go to school. She loved her siblings but with adolescence and fiery personalities, she often found herself butting with them quite often, making it a very lonely environment, especially when most of her friends all lived in Seoul. Jin-Ho’s life was the complete opposite. He was the eldest of three, his family running a real estate conglomerate that dominated Seoul. They were a powerful family, a respected family, and with Jin-Ho as the eldest, he was expected to set an example for his younger siblings. Most times, the pressure was suffocating, which led to many rebellions and fights with his parents. This would only get worse as the years went on.

By October 1994, Jin-Ho realized he had fallen in love with his best friend Seon-Hee. It was a feeling that crept up on him little by little by their next term. He couldn’t resist the way her nose would crinkle up in a smile or how she’d snort when she’d laugh at something hilarious. He found her habits endearing, and he couldn’t get enough of her. By December 1994, he confessed to Seon-Hee. She was taken aback and for the first few weeks, it was awkward around the two friends...but she sealed the deal right under the mistletoe just days before winter break.

The year was 1995. Seon-Hee was sent to live with her aunt in Seoul who would be taking care of business affairs as her parents’ restaurant branched off into the big city. There was no more meeting up at the train station, but instead, Jin-Ho would wait for her everyday, rain or shine, for both of them to walk to school together. It was that year that Kang Seon-Hee and Jung Jin-Ho were the school’s it-couple, they held hands proudly, passionately made out when the teachers weren’t looking...they couldn’t keep their hands off of each other!

Outside of school, was a different story, however. With the Kang restaurant growing larger in size in Seoul and there were talks of expansion, this made the Jung family catch wind of this...especially when the Kangs inadvertently put the Jung’s favorite restaurant out of business. It wasn’t their fault that they provided excellent service, after all. The Jung’s weren’t having it and did a lot to thwart the Kang’s. It wasn’t until they discovered their eldest son holding hands with the Kang’s daughter when they realized more could be done behind this. So they did.

They began to meddle in the life of their son, suggesting other, “prettier” girls towards Jin-Ho rather than the “plain” Seon-Hee, but he was stubborn. He loved that girl to the stars and beyond and there was no going back from that. So they tried to buy off Seon-Hee...she turned down 5 million won politely, for the love of Jin-Ho. She was moonstruck by her boyfriend and nothing could steer her away from him. This left the Jungs to be more frustrated and so, Mr. Jung, took matters into his own hands and played the dirtiest game by running the Kang restaurant out of Seoul. When the Kangs caught wind of this, not only were they infuriated, but deeply hurt as they lost lots of money from the scheme and at the end, had to pull Seon-Hee from school to transfer her to a local school.

Seon-Hee and Jin-Ho were devastated, but they weren’t so easily deterred. Jin-Ho promised every weekend to sneak away and visit her in Gwangju, and that was exactly how it went for a solid month...until the two were caught together by Mrs. Kang right before the holidays. So, the two came up with a plan to runaway together. Jin-Ho managed to steal an impressive amount of money from his family and booked two tickets to New Zealand. He thought that it would be a good cover to pretend that they were exchange students in New Zealand rather than in the States for them to sneak their way back into school and work on the weekends to stay afloat. Seon-Hee was elated and didn’t hesitate to say yes to Jin-Ho.

They left Korea right before winter break. While missing posters went up in Korea for both of them, they laid low in Auckland.

The year was 1996. They managed to settle in a small flat in and for first few weeks, the honeymoon phase between them was pretty noticeable. Between work and forging fake documents to attend school, things were going swimmingly well for the young couple. They even made friends! Seon-Hee fell violently ill around Valentine’s Day at school. Ava knew something was up and suggest, just to be on the safe side, for Seon-Hee to get a pregnancy test.

By the next week, she was staring at the ultrasound with her tears blurring her vision. She was pregnant. Telling Jin-Ho was the easy part though. He was caring, loving, and empathetic towards her. He promised her that he’d do everything he could to take care of their new growing family and reassured Seon-Hee that this would only bring them closer....which was a bold faced lie. By Friday night, right after a grueling shift at work, Seon-Hee arrived to their flat with his things gone, a note, and 100K “for the baby and other expenses”. It was a heartbreak like no other. A heartbreak that made the girl feel as if she were plunged into the ocean with cement blocks tied to her feet. She drowned in it.

Ava found her best friend Sunday evening to drop off food, her eyes were puffy from crying. Realizing that Jin-Ho had up and left, Ava knew she couldn’t leave her best friend alone. While sure, they were young and sixteen, she’d do her best to make sure her best friend was taken care of. The topic of abortion was brought up at first, but Seon-Hee turned it down. While she knew she wasn’t ready to raise a child, something had told her she was about to embark on a new journey to learn how to. With the help of Ava and Ava’s family, they helped Seon-Hee embark on a grueling journey to give birth on a rainy October morning.

“Nova,” she told Ava with tears in her eyes. “Nova Byeol Kang. A new star.” Ava’s eyes also teared up at the name, it was a name fit for such a mighty little being. And mighty, was just the beginning of the story of Nova.

The year was 1999. Seon-Hee is in tears next to a now three-year old Nova as she received her marks, she was going to university. It was a sigh of relief that things were indeed worth all the sleepless nights and hard work. “We did it, Nova!” She giggled as she wiped her tears away. It was such a weight off her shoulders that she’d be attending university. Ava would also help her as their schedules often alternated. Things were finally looking up!

“Mama, don’t cry,” Nova said with the sweetest smile and nuzzled her little face on Seon-Hee’s. She didn’t understand how she had the sweetest daughter, but she held that little one tightly to her chest. Her baby. Her sweet star. Her Nova. She didn’t know what love was until her...and it was the best form of love, in her eyes.

#GOOD MORNING EVERYONE #HAPPY WEDNESDAY #sp

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sommer-girl · 4 years ago

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Past, Present, Future | self para

June, 2025

When the lease would finally end on Anna’s off-campus apartment, the hardest thing to sort through in the end would be the books. From her vantage point in the doorway of her bedroom, her graduation gown from her master’s degree still hung on her closet door and various pictures, some new and some old, littered her dresser. Anna would keep those. She could never leave them behind. It was the books, though, that stared at Anna challengingly. You haven’t touched us in years, they seemed to say. Are you really going to keep us?

She stepped closer to her bookshelf, picking a worn, faded book at random. The Flatshare, it was called. Anna remembered now. She had read it back in the February of her first year at Pride U, right before Valentine’s Day. Right before... a lot of things changed in Anna’s life. She flicked through it fondly, but the story didn’t call to her the way it might have before. Anna already knew that she would probably not keep it.

It did make Anna feel guilty, that she didn’t read as much anymore. She always told people that it was because she had to do so much reading for her graduate degree, combing through old letters and hefty history books and squinting for hours at digital archives that she just didn’t have the time or energy for the books she used to like anymore. But Anna knew it wasn’t just because of that.

And it wasn’t just about “outgrowing” those bright, sugar-sweet stories about the trials and triumphs of love. If anything, the past few years had made Anna believe in love stories more than ever. How difficult they could be at times, but how worth it, too.

No, if Anna was being honest with herself, the thing she had always loved about books was that they took her somewhere else. And over the past few years, as graduation had loomed like a deadline, Anna had wanted to be as present in Swynlake as possible. This town was starting to feel more like home than Arendelle ever had, if Anna was being honest, and the worlds she had once escaped to just didn’t have the same pull.

The sight of them, all lined up on her bookshelf, gave Anna a little twinge of regret. But she couldn’t take them all with her. And she couldn’t stay here-- well, maybe someday she could come back (she hoped so... leaving Swynlake forever felt like cutting out an important part of herself) but first, she had business to take care of back home.

*~*~*~*

January, 2021

Anna hadn’t been able to take all of her books with her. She was allowed two suitcases on the plane, and everything else would have to be purchased or rented in Swynlake (she had received all of this information with a passive-aggressive reminder that if she had just gone to the University of Oslo, she would be in driving distance and could bring as many books as she wanted to). But that wasn’t as important to Anna as potentially getting her sister back.

Still, her paltry bookshelf stared back at her once she unpacked her room, and it bothered her. Anna had never had so few books in her life. Back at home, her bookshelf was overflowing with stories: fairytales and adventure stories, romances and history books, an entire row of her bookshelf dedicated to stories about plucky Victorian orphans who fought their way through loneliness and found a family. Those had always been her favorites, for some reason.

There wasn’t much to be done, though, aside from buying out the entirety of Chapter Three, though, which seemed impractical. Anna had to go to class, anyway. She was just going to have to deal with it. It was just an aesthetic thing, anyway. Just because Anna didn’t like looking at an empty bookshelf wasn’t reason enough to spend a ridiculous amount of money...

Until she saw a listing in the school Facebook group: “Books! Moving back home, can’t take all of them with me! Price negotiable!”

Anna grinned, already shooting the upperclassman a message: How much for the lot of them?

*~*~*~*~*

March, 2021

It was the fourth day of spring break, and Anna was still barely halfway through the first book in her stack. She knew she was letting her followers down, not posting a review of a new book each day like she had promised. Back when Anna had gone on family vacations when she was younger, she had always torn through books, finishing five or six by the end of the week.

But there was so much to do here! So much to see! There were games in the rec room and parties at night and, if Anna was honest, she spent a lot of time just typing messages back and forth with Devyn, idle conversation or deep talks, just happy to be together no matter what they were doing. And Anna knew that Devyn probably wouldn’t mind if Anna read while they hung out, but for the first time, Anna... didn’t want to. She wanted to be here. In the present.

Other students were looking for books, though. and by the time the week was over, Anna had lent out almost every title she had brought with her. Her backpack was significantly lighter, with just the original book she had brought sitting at the bottom, a smoothie receipt marking her place near the end of the book. The part when the fictional Anna goes home.

She wanted to be able to say she finished at least one book before the end of the trip, but there was a closing party happening on the top deck. Anna shoved the book back in her bag and put on a dress she had bought at one of the ports, feeling more like the protagonist of one of her books than a wistful observer. Maybe tonight she could let go of the stories she had wanted her life to look like and enjoy the one she had. Because, Anna thought, it was a pretty epic one.

September, 2025

Improbably, Anna was back in Swynlake. And, she noticed as she walked back into her favorite coffee shop to reconnect with someone she hadn’t seen in a while, and spotted a little lending library in a corner, it seemed that so were her books.

#starting off by writing about graduation was either really cathartic or emotional self sabotage i cant decide #lmao #anyway this made me emo #bdrptask #self para

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camilladunne-a · 4 years ago

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💘 + henry & cat

send me 💘 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they first met and how

eles se conheceram quando os van helsing se mudaram para manhattan! os huntington, como os bons vizinhos que são, devem ter convidados eles pra um chá ou algo assim, e os dois foram apresentados, já que tinham a mesma idade. eles devem ter demorado um pouco pra virarem amiguinhos (cat chatinha e muito mandona + henrik quieto demais e com sotaque ainda), mas depois de um tempo se tornaram inseparáveis.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved

assim que eles atingiram a pré-adolescência eles começaram nessas brincadeirinhas, o que não devia ser nada demais visto que eles já eram muito amigos. mas conforme foram ficando mais velhos ficava mais uma tensão... acho que os sentimentos começaram quando os dois eram mais novos mesmo, mas eles ignoraram kkkkkkkk.

who fell for who first ( if applicable )

eu acho que o henry, acho que ele se apaixonou primeiro e se deu conta disso primeiro também. a catherine foi depois, mas demorou muito pra se tocar.

where their first date was and what it was like

difícil essa, porque os dois saem juntos desde que se entendem por gente né? acho que o primeiro primeiro deve ter sido eles com uns 10 anos, indo tomar sorvete ou patinar no central park. mas o primeiro encontro real oficial, sem ser subentendido ou nada, deve ter sido em boston, ou seja, só quando foram pra faculdade; provavelmente foram em algum museu que a cat falou sobre ou em algum restaurante muito chique da cidade.

who asks who out and how

eles meio que não precisam dessa formalidade toda kkkkkkk, mas o primeiro date oficial eu imagino que tenha sido a catherine, pedindo pra eles irem juntos em algum lugar e só então se tocando e brincando que aquele era o primeiro encontro deles.

who proposes first

henrik! existem certos (todos) gender roles que ela não está disposta a quebrar.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away

depois de passarem uns bons dois anos na categoria amantes, eles pensaram que iam ter paz, mas eu não tão boazinha assim! eles pensaram que tudo ia dar certo depois da escola, mas aí o james não aceitou bem o término e passou a infernizar a catherine, o que deve ter feito eles esconderem o namoro por mais algum tempo.

where the proposal happens and how

na alemanha! no castelo (eles tem cara de quem teriam um castelo), ou algo parecido, dos van helsing. os dois deviam estar viajando depois da formatura e aconteceu no jardim ou na biblioteca, e tudo bem romântico, parecendo um conto de fadas, do jeito que a cat sempre sonhou.

if they adopt any pets together

os dois são cat persons (literalmente), então se fosse pra adotar algum animal seriam gatos. mas, o henry já tinha os gatinhos dele e eu acabei de ter uma visão aqui e decidi que a cate tem um furão desde que é pequenininha hahaha.

who’s more dominant

assim, em público, pros outros, o henrik �� quem manda em tudo, manda na cat, na relação, tudo; mas só porque a cat deixa parecer assim. porém, em quesito dominância mesmo acho que isso é um dos poucos conflitos de personalidade que eles tem, já que os dois não estão acostumados a fazer nada além de mandar.

where their first kiss was and what it was like

foi quando eles tinham uns doze anos, depois da festa de alguma colega que teve o famigerado jogo da garrafa e que ela deve ter se recusado a jogar, e depois ficou emburrada por isso. então eles se beijaram, pra resolver esse problema, e não pararam mais kkkkkkkk.

if they have any matching couples stuff

meu deus não kkkkkkkkkkk, nada elegante. assim combinando, no máximo, deve ser o jogo de toalhas deles ou, sei lá, os relógios caríssimos versão ele e ela. mas só coisas assim, discretas, nada que pareça que foi comprado numa lojinha de 1 real.

how into pda they are

bastante, e desde que são só amigos. mãos dados, beijos, abraços, os dois estão sempre se tocando em público, não importa (mas de maneira mais sutil).

who holds the umbrella when it rains

henrik, porque, além de educado, ele também é mais alto.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is

pra mim é o met! acho que muitos realizações e momentos, desde pequenos até quando estavam escolhendo os nomes das meninas, devem ter acontecido por lá.

who’s more protective

os dois são.... mas acho que a catherine é um pouco mais, principalmente porque ela não aceita, jamais, alguém indo contra alguém que ela ama (e porque ela é bem ciumenta também kkkkk).

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ )

dividir cama eles sempre dividiram, desde crianças, então nunca foi um big deal - até o james achava normal. mas pra eles fazerem sexo acho que demorou um pouco mais do que eu imaginaria pra eles, que são tão próximos, porque a cat tinha toda aquela neura com virgindade e tratava como se fosse algo mega hiper importante.

if they argue about anything

sim?? eles não brigam muito por coisas bestas, já que como se conhecem tão bem e tudo mais eles conseguem resolver, porém, quando brigam mesmo é sobre algo sério.

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. )

hmmmm, os dois. principalmente quando ainda tinha james no meio de tudo, o henrik devia fazer de propósito e a cat também, porque ela tinha ciúmes deles.

who steals whose clothes and how often

a catherine é muito certinha no quesito roupas pra ficar pegando emprestado, devia rolar mais no colégio e quando era novinhos, pegando os moletons e jaquetas dele; mais velhos no máximo a camisa dele pra dormir.

how they cuddle

hmmm, acho que a cat deve se aconchegar nele, deitando meio no peito/ombro dele, enquanto ele abraça. nos dias que eles tão muito amorzinho, de conchinha mesmo.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is

cringe, mas, simplesmente, a companhia um do outro. estando juntos eles tão legais, mas se fosse escolher algo eu diria que irem em museus ou almoçarem/jantarem juntos.

how long they stay mad at each other

ainda que os dois sejam muito orgulhosos, também são quase dependentes um do outro, então depende do nível da briga. o máximo que eles devem ter ficado brigados pra valer, sem se falar, foi um mês e pouco (a briga depois do prom k), mas, geralmente, depois de uns dois, três dias eles já se resolvem.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are

o henrik tem cara de quem toma chá, mas, independente, acho que ele deve ser bem pretencioso e sempre pedir o mais básico/clássico possível, o tipo de pessoa que fala que os iced coffe do tiktok não é café e sim milkshake. já a cat ela não é aquelas meninas com pedidos impossíveis e longos, mas odeia coisa amarga (e ama iced coffe), então sempre pede algo com leite e caramelo - mas leite de amêndoas.

if they ever have any children together

simmm!! meus quatro netinhos T_T

if they have any special pet names for each other

o henrik chama ela de kitty cat e ela uma das poucas que chama ele de henry, fora isso só os básicos mesmo (my darling, my love, etc etc).

if they ever split up and / or get back together

bem, tecnicamente eles ficam meio separados depois do prom, mas não estavam oficialmente juntos; fora isso acho que não.

what their shared living space is like

olha de quem estamos falando né kkkkkkkkk, não só a sala, mas toda a casa deles, deve ser sempre impecável de limpa e organizada. e, no quesito decoração, é tudo bem clássico e caro, no melhor estilo old money.

what their first christmas as a couple was like

eu acho que no primeiro natal dos dois como namorados eles devem ter inventado alguma desculpa e ficado na faculdade, ao invés de voltar pra nova york, principalmente se o james ainda estivesse enchendo o saco; deve ter sido algo bem simples (pra eles), mas foi incrível. já depois de casados, eu imagino que a catherine tenha insistido em dar a festa de natal da família e levou todo mundo a loucura (henrik aos empregados) tentando deixar tudo perfeito, afinal, primeiro ano sendo uma van helsing, tinha que provar ser suficiente.

what their names are in each other’s phones

henhen 💘 & kitty cat 🖤 e no futuro: henry ❤️ & mrs. van helsing (que a cat deve ter colocado logo que eles casaram, mas ele deixou assim).

if they have any ‘couple traditions’

não eram um casal, mas ainda assim todo valentine’s day eles passavam juntos, vendo todas as comédias românticas possíveis que a cat conseguia achar. mas eles devem sempre ter tido algumas tradições, desde a época de amigos, tipo jogar tênis juntos no domingo, tomarem brunch de sábado e essas coisas.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first

os dois eu acho que a catherine, porque ela segue rotina muito a risca.

who’s the big spoon / little spoon

henrik e catherine, respectivamente, mas de vez em quando eles mudam.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside

eu não acho que eles lidem com esse tipo de problema shfdhf, mas, talvez nos hamptons, seria o henrik, porque a catherine ia passar mal kkkkkkkkkkk.

#q.#˙ ៹ ♡ henrik & catherine . *#everlynhugo #‧ ❛ 𝒊𝒏𝒃𝒐𝒙 / answered .#˙ ៹ ♡ answered asks . *#aya.

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kennagiardi · 4 years ago

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𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 // para

𝐖𝐇𝐎: Kenna Giardi & @milespearce

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍: Sunday, February 14th. Night.

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄: Breadstix. Candyland.

Kenna had no intentions of showing up to Candy Motta’s Valentine’s extravaganza, especially now that New Directions had secured a regionals win? The only sound in the back of her head was practice, practice, practice. Even if Vocal Adrenaline did win regionals, it meant that they needed to already think about how they were going to win nationals and how they were going to take down their real competition which would be the rag tag team of underdogs. Plus with Bryan Ryan’s announcement of Spring Awakening, her February would simply have to stay booked, but after one Kendra Giardi caught wind of Candyland, she dictated that Kenna had to go. Originally Kenna had planned to go with Sage and one of her friends, but she backed out last minute. So once Kendra had chewed her out, the blonde begged some guy from Carmel to take her. After arriving to Breadstix, her and her date found themselves sectioned into a booth. If anything, this allowed Kenna to take notice of her competition. Maybe she could count this as a workday. In the next booth over, she checked Miles Pearce and his date, some untuned Canary. Pitiful. Instead of paying attention to what her actual date was saying, Kenna decided to eavesdrop on whatever it was Miles and Nico were talking about but as soon as she started tuning in, Miles’ little bird was announcing she needed to go to the ladies room because she ‘wanted to see what kind of toilet paper they had’. This time, excusing herself from her table, she got up and slid directly into Nico’s warm seat. “Miles,” she greeted. “You were great at regionals,” she complimented, placing her elbows on the table, “I didn’t go, but I heard your rendition of Closing Time was immaculate,” had she actually heard that? No, but she had caught wind of New Directions’ setlist from the likes of Vocal Adrenaline members who did go. “Shame about your date though,” a pause. “I mean, was this just some pity because the Canaries lost and you’re so out of her league or am I witnessing Shakespeare at this very moment? Gotta say, I’m pleasantly surprised no one’s reenacted Romeo & Juliet yet.”

#miles.#interactions.#use somebody.

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ofmiles · 4 years ago

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SELF-PARA | MAH

warning: mentions of drugs, cancer, and thoughts of loss are a common theme in the below narrative. please don’t read this if any of those might trigger you!

perhaps, if you try hard enough, you can think back to the very first christmas that you remember. maybe you even recall a gift you were given - a train set, a doll, a now favorite book. when you think of that day, there are likely other people involved. the same people who flood memories of other holidays, of birthdays, of graduations. often, they fill the bad memories too. ones of pain and anguish, ones of loss, and of moments you wish you’d never have to remember again in your life.

finding out your mother has cancer is a newly established memory, imprinted into miles’s brain forever, he’s sure of it. most of his time has been spent in his room, googling too much, watching too many sad movies, and sending texts or making phone calls in search of the light. but tonight, tonight his feet move against the familiar pavement of the streets that have carried him through life.

cobblestones of the inner circle lake wisteria is settled around are a firm setting in miles hollis’s young mind. town festivals filled his childhood memories with cotton candy floss, balloon animals, and distinct traditions like the annual christmas tree lighting. his earliest memory of his mother blinks green and red, the frigid new england air washing over them. snow settled onto evergreens. four year old miles had discarded his gloves at the hot cocoa booth, running to his parents to show them how amazing the mini marshmallows are. boots a bit too big and he fell over himself, hot chocolate washes down the front of his body, palms skinned against the pavement. immediate tears and delilah, in all of her calm, scooped him up. a kiss to each hand, a few words of encouragement, her sweet nature, big smile - miles was healed. never left her side the rest of the night. safety, warmth, calm.

sneakers pad heavily onto the hardened tar, eyes clear, soft smile on his lips at the memories of being a kid. body stays light, hanging a right onto the road that passes by holiday house. eyes scan the large building he’d spent so much time in - with rebe, with friends, recently, back in high school. back in high school. fuck.

the end result of one buchanan party in particular vibrates as it comes into view. hardly memorable to him - the dancing, the lines of cocaine, the shots, the laughter of sharing stories, the lines of cocaine, rebe with some guy, more lines, dante with charlie, another, cj daring someone to jump in the pool - it’s cold - one more line won’t hurt. then, waking up in the hospital, delilah is bent over the edge of his bed. the strain in her voice evident as she begs miles to open his eyes. begs him to come back to her. heavy lids struggle to lift, struggle to give into her pleas. hand squeezes hers and that very strain turns to disbelief. to celebration. still distraught, she sits up, speaking directly to her son. “ it’s okay, miles, honey, it’s okay. please open your eyes, let us help you. dear god, let us help you. ” ardent, persistent, hopeful.

heart racing, tears fill his eyes. hang a left down a street on the ‘rougher’ side of lake wisteria. a familiar apartment building jogs his mind as his feet continue the same.

there’s balloons, party hats, laughter. tables filled with more food than even a gaggle of four and five year olds can consume. miles and theo sit side by side as he opens the gift he’d gotten for the birthday boy. delilah told miles that it wasn’t a gift you get for a friend turning five, it’s a gift you get for someone you might marry, someone who meant more to you than that. but miles didn’t care. the heart shaped box of candies and the teddybear with love in its hands was what had spoken to him. hours of delilah and miles scouring children’s toys for him to simply pluck his favorite things from the valentines day section a few aisles down. hours he’d spent with his mother deciding on something for a boy who would become his brother. a boy he’d have to share every memory of his mother with from here on out. patient, wise, sweet.

tears stream down his face now, no stopping them as he picks up the pace, the sound of his feet on the pavement charging him toward the jones’. a palace of all things pure and kind and young.

except, a few weeks back, when miles had been running this very same route - eyes trained on the window of cj’s room. figure of his saddened little brother in view, eyes rimming with tears. if only they’d known then why they were both in lake wisteria after all. if only they’d known that being so fucking hard on each other all of these years would end them right here. he’s reminded, too, of the soft wave they’d shared just moments before he’d left for boston. nothing but torn shreds of a heart in his chest and somehow it vibrated between his ears as it beat. the same feeling when the news was first shared. delilah, all of these years, had wanted but one thing. for the hollis brothers to get along. and they’d failed her. miles had failed her. disappointment, anger, sadness.

his feet can’t take him farther - at the edge of the lake that holds every mystery unknown to this damn town, hiding is no longer an option. sobs shake his ribs open, knees cave in, hands digging into the dirt he’s now pressed into. why couldn’t he be like her? why couldn’t he give her all of the things she’d always given him? there’s no air he can breathe, no memory to recall, nothing that will stop the anguish that is now fully unleashed in his being. a loud scream leaves his lungs, echoing across the lake’s glassy surface.

what the hell is he supposed to do if there’s no more memories to be made?

#miles hollis #self para 002 #illness tw #cancer tw #drugs tw

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writer-jamie · 5 years ago

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Just One Look (Jill x Carlos) Chapter 2: Lies

story summary: jill meets carlos’ family after two months of dating. carlos promises it won’t be dramatic but that is very different to how the situation turned out.

chapter summary: umbrella’s lies about jill valentine and the rest of her team get spread to the ears of the oliveira’s and jill hears first hand how carlos’s sister really feels.

word count: 2,168

a/n: i'm back! i couldn't stay away from this story for long so i'm back writing again. i’m exhausted at the moment because my sleep schedule is all over the place. it’s not as long as the last chapter but then again the chapters will fluctuate between lengths based on the story in each chapter! also i have started to get more involved in the fnaf story and my blood pressure is pretty high right now 😅 also due to someone asking I will be including the Spanish to English translations at the end so you can read along! ❤️

The sound shone bright through the blinds. Beads of sweat fell down Jill's forehead as she woke from her slumber. Her warmth wasn't helped by the large figure hold her close too his bare chest. Carlos could warm anyone up, he was like a hot water bottle. But Jill wasn't complaining, in winter it was winter back on the US but here, it was warm always. Jill wasn't planing on spending her Christmas with anyone other than Barry and his family. Christmas wasn't really a fun time for her, so Barry had told her she could spend the holiday with him and his family. Jill originally agreed to this plan until her and Carlos started to get serious and he invited her to his family home for Christmas. Barry didn't mind the change in plans, he was happy that Jill was with someone and happy. Anyway Jill promised to spend a few weeks with him and his family because she missed spending time with the man.

Carlos moved around and opened his eyes, looking down at Jill who was awake but didn't want to move just yet. “Jill. You are awake, might as well get up.” Carlos laughed and nudged her shoulders as she clung his chest, shaking her head. “It’s too warm to move.” She groaned and sat up, pushing her hair out of her face and tucking her hair behind her ear. Carlos held onto the waist as she moved and pushed her cheek into her back. “How am I supposed to get up with you attached to me?” She asked and turned to face him, putting her hands against his face and kissing his forehead. “Let’s shower.” He mumbled and sat up, dragging himself into the bathroom. Jill watched him away from her and she smiled, even when sweaty and groggy, he looked hot. Jill stood up and rubbed her forearm, yawning as she followed the man into the bathroom. She watched as Carlos turned the shower on, letting the water run for a couple seconds before it started to run warm. He got Jill to lock the door before he leaned down and kissed her lips, running her fingers down her side. When he got to the bottom of her shirt, he lifted it quickly, exposing her breasts without any warning. Jill shivered and tilted her head slightly, looking into his dark eyes. He pulled his shorts down, leaving himself completely exposed and Jill soon joined him and pulled her underwear down too, exposing her bottom half. Carlos smiled like a child in the candy store and attacked her neck, lacing her with kisses and bites. Jill pushed his shoulders away gently and looked at him. “Don’t waste the water. Let’s jump in.” Jill walked into the shower and laid her head back when the hot water hit her body. She ran her fingers through her hair and grabbed the shampoo, quickly washing her brunette hair. After Raccoon City, Jill never took showers for granted. And she never took showers with Carlos for granted. He would always treat her so well and make sure that she was having a good time. When they had baths, he would praise her and rub her shoulders, ensuring that she was relaxing.

Carlos walked up behind her and put his hands on her waist, placing kisses on his shoulders and neck while the water runs into their faces. Jill puts her arms back into his hair and grabbed the shampoo, allowing the man to wash his curly hair while Jill washed her body. Once Carlos finished washing his hair, he turned his attention to the woman and turned her around, pushing her gently against the wall. “When did we last have sex, love?” He whispered in her ear. The woman chuckled and put her hands on his shoulders. “Two days ago. Unless you count last night?” She rolled her eyes and looked at him. Carlos was a sex machine. He would have sex all day if he could, but it was different for a woman. Jill can’t just get hard and fuck people, she had to recover and get over the way that Carlos would stretch her out. Carlos tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek, rubbing circles on her hips. He was about to start on her when a knock on the bathroom door made him jump. “Carlos! Breakfast is ready! Mama wants everyone downstairs in ten minutes!” Daniela called and walked out of their room, leaving Carlos shocked. “We get no privacy!” He laughed and put his neck in the crook of Jill’s neck before leaning over to turn the water off. “I think we need to start locking both doors if we want to have sex, Mr Oliveira.” Jill chuckled and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around her body and walking back into the room, grabbing a change of clothes and some underwear. “Hey unless you wanna be fucked right here, right now, don't play the Mr card.” He warned and followed after her, picking out an outfit and changing. “Mhm, we will see.” She joked and continued changing.

Jill laid on a towel in the garden with Carlos as the children were playing around them. She had her head on his chest and was playing with his fingers as one of his sisters started to approach the towel. “Hi! I’m Vivian. We didn't meet last night because of the baby but it’s nice to meet you.” She picked up the newborns arm and waved down at Jill. “I’m sorry to interrupt but would you guys mind watching Milo while I go to the shops with Mama?” Jill stood up and nodded, without having to think twice she took the baby out of her hands and held him. “Of course. We don't mind.” Jill smiled down at the baby and rocked him in her arms. She cooed at the baby and looked at Carlos, who shook his head and nodded at his sister. “What?” Jill asked as Vivian walked away and back into the house. “’I don't like babies. I hate that baby on that plane’.” He mocked the woman and she raised her eyebrows at him. “Oi. Don’t you start. He’s adorable.” She sat down and laid the baby down on the towel. One of the little girl’s ran outside with a small sunhat and some toys. “Ah thank you Maria!” Carlos thanked his niece and put the small hat on the baby and gave him a giraffe toy to play with. “Thank you.” Jill smiled at the girl and she sat with them. “My daddy says that you were in the army, and that you killed people. Is that true? Do you kill people?” The young girl questioned Jill, unknowing that he questions were hitting her in a hard place. “I was in the army yes, but I didn't kill people, sweetie.” Maria looked at her with wide eyes. “Why did you leave?” The innocent girl asked. “Some people hurt my friends, and I couldn't keep working with the people that hurt them.” Maria nodded and looked at Carlos who was smiling at Jill. “Tío Carlos?” The girl looked at the larger man and nodded. “Mama said she wanted to talk to you.” Carlos nodded. He placed a kiss on Jill’s cheek and walked into the house, leaving Jill alone at the mercy of the children. Anyone questions like that and she wasn't sure how much longer she could take it.

After a few minutes, Milo started to cry so Jill picked him up and walked him around the garden. She checked the time on her watch and released that he must be hungry. She walked towards the kitchen door and heard yelling. She shushed the baby and listened into the argument. “Really Carlos! She was a part of that team! They kill people!” The woman yelled. “I killed people! I was in the UBCS! We killed people there too Camila! ¿Cuál es tu maldito problema? Ella es una buena persona.” The woman chuckled sarcastically before continuing the argument. “¿Hablas en serio ahora? ¡Carlos, te uniste a ese ejército para salvar gente! Ella estaba en esa mansión. La cantidad de personas que murieron allí...” Carlos groaned loudly and looked at the woman. “¡Te das cuenta de que Jill casi muere allí también! Ella también perdió gente! Ella no hizo nada malo! ¡La estás culpando por el trabajo de un terrorista! ¡Los mismos terroristas para los que trabajé!” The woman started to walk back and forth in the kitchen. “Carlos she is a killer!”

Jill stood up and walked through the open door, tears running down her cheeks. Carlos looked at her and started to walk towards her before she put her hand up. “You may think i'm a killer but they killed my family. Those people at the Mansion were my family. And i lost them. I loved them and they took them from me. So yes, I killed who I had to to ensure that I wouldn't loose anyone else.” Jill wiped her eyes and looked at the woman and then back to Carlos. “Sé suficiente español para saber de qué estabas hablando.” She turned around and walked out the kitchen and into the living room, Milo still in her arms. Carlos chased after her and started apologising, in English and Spanish. Jill turned around and shook her head. She passed the now sleeping baby to him before she walked off, needing space.

“Barry..They all hate me. His sister called me a killer. A terrorist. I can’t do this..” Jill cried down the phone. She always called Barry when she needed advice or help. He always knew what to say. Probably because he had two daughters of his own and Jill’s parents weren't the best. She had nothing against her parents but they didn't raise her right. Their household wasn't full of love like the Burton household, she was raised to be a fighter, whether she liked it or not. “I'm sure that's not true honey. His family probably only knows what the news has shown and what the media has portrayed. Carlos hasn't explained stuff to them properly but you are nothing what they say you are. You are so full of love and you are so so caring.” He sighed from the other end of the phone, hearing Jill sniffle. “I love you, honey. The second you get back you are coming over for dinner. With or without that Carlos fella.” Barry smiled hearing her laugh for the first time in months. “I love you too, Burton.” She wiped her eyes and continued her chat with Barry.

When Carlos finally found her, she was on the phone. He stood far away to give her her privacy. He waited for her to finish her call before walking towards her. “Alright love, the kids are calling me. But please, ring me if you need me.” Barry hung up and left Jill to deal with the situation at hand. “Jill.” She turned around and shook her head, looking at Carlos. “Look I get it. Your family has only seen what has been advertised and the media has said that the survivors of the Mansion were involved in the attack. It sucks that Umbrella has so much control but they do. And your family is worried. Worried that you might have brought a killer home, worried I might hurt their children and they have every right to be worried. Carlos I've killed before, I've killed children who turned. I can't get them out my mind but I did it. And I will go to hell for what I've done but there is no way I can let Umbrella get away with it. So I won't stop until I find those responsible and bring them to justice.” She wiped the tears from her eyes and remembered back to all those she lost. “I will leave, if that means your family feels safe. I will go.” Carlos walked towards her and grabbed her hand, putting it on his cheek. “No. You can’t go. I need you here, I need you all the time. You aren't who Umbrella says you are, you aren’t a killer. All those things in RC, they were already dead. You didn't kill them, all you did was put them out of their misery and stop them living an undead existence.” He used his other hand to wipe her cheeks. He started to plaster kisses on his face and hands to show her that he loved her. “I love you Jill. I love you so much. Te adoro por favor no me dejes.” He begged and moved away from her, kissing her knuckles. Jill breathed deeply and looked at Carlos. “I’m sorry. I love you.” She walked towards him and put her face in his neck. “I love you.” He whispered and hugged her close, kissing her neck and running his fingers down the back of her neck.

Spanish - English Translation:

Tío -Uncle

¿Cuál es tu maldito problema? Ella es una buena persona. - What is your damn problem? She is a good person.

¿Hablas en serio ahora? ¡Carlos, te uniste a ese ejército para salvar gente! Ella estaba en esa mansión. La cantidad de personas que murieron allí... - Are you serious now Carlos, you joined that army to save people! She was in that mansion. The number of people who died there...

¡Te das cuenta de que Jill casi muere allí también! Ella también perdió gente! Ella no hizo nada malo! ¡La estás culpando por el trabajo de un terrorista! ¡Los mismos terroristas para los que trabajé! - You realize Jill almost died there too! She also lost people! She did nothing wrong! You're blaming her for the work of a terrorist! The same terrorists that I worked for!

Sé suficiente español para saber de qué estabas hablando. - I know enough Spanish to know what you were talking about.

Te adoro por favor no me dejes - I adore you please don't leave me.

#spanish speakers #translation #jill x carlos #jill valentine #carlos oliveira #posted on ao3 #post-re3 #resident evil 3 #angst #fluff #slow burn #chapter 2

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colorsicantsee · 4 years ago

Text

Seblaine Para-Present Day(Early March)

Para: We Can Just Dance To This

Rating: PG-13/R.

Pairing: Seblaine.

Sebastian: @colorsicantsee

Blaine: @twoblueheartslocked

Time: Present Day- March 6, Saturday. About two and a half weeks after- (I Wanna Sleep Next To You- But That’s All I Wanna Do Right Now)

Location: Brooklyn, New York

Info: Sebastian takes Blaine out for a night of dancing. Blaine’s very much out of his comfort zone but Sebastian is sweet and intoxicating and the drinks are, too. He loosens up a little too much.

Warnings: This RP mentions past abuse(Physical, mental and some sexual), anxiety, depression, drug use, alcohol use, cussing, death(parents).

Extra Warnings: (This RP is not Kurt Hummel friendly. You’ve all been warned.)

Notes: Some canon events remain in place while others have been changed. Some things may even be out of order. You can consider this sort of canon divergent AU. A few changes are that Blaine’s parents are different from the show (His mother is Filipina), he didn’t cheat on Kurt or date Dave and Sebastian is younger than Blaine. Feel free to send a message if you have any questions!

Extra Notes: Under Cut because of length and some sensitive content.

Sebastian’s POV:

As cliché as it sounded, Sebastian couldn’t believe that he had gotten Blaine to agree to a night of dancing and drinking. He promised that they could stay in Brooklyn and that he’d arrange for them to have a driver the whole night so that they could get home safely or leave anytime that Blaine wanted. Seb hoped that it would help him feel more comfortable and able to open up a bit more. “Dancing might be fun. You were always a natural, B. If you get uncomfortable just say the word and we’re gone. I promise. I want you to have fun and that means telling me if you need to go.”

Of course Blaine looked amazing in a tight fitting shirt and dark jeans that looked tailored to his body. Sebastian took a deep breath as he watched him shrug out of his jacket in the car, could smell his cologne and wanted nothing more to press him into the back seat and kiss him all over but, alas they had dancing to do. He ran his sweaty palms over his jeans and swallowed, “you look great. Like, really great.”

They arrived at a popular Brooklyn bar that Blaine had suggested. The music was loud and the dancefloor was packed. It was dark except for the flashes of pink and blue and green neon lights. Blaine’s face looked beautiful as the colors flashed over his honey colored eyes. His head bopping along to the music. Sebastian lifted his hands up so that the other man could see them and held one out so he could pull him towards the bar. As they pushed through the people, Seb noticed that a lot of the partiers were wearing bright colors or flannels, tee shirts with Nickelodeon cartoons, and there was a drag Queen dressed up as T Boz from TLC. He listened a little more closely to the music and it sounded like an Ace of Base song. “B, I think it’s 90’s night. I don’t think we dressed for it. At least we know the music will be good.”

Seb ordered them two specialty drinks on the menu for the 90s party (It was called The All That and had...well, everything in it.) and they each took a shot before they pushed past a messy Britney Spears and a drunk dude in a Bulls jersey making out. “Ready to dance?” He held out his hand again as ‘Another Night’ blasted through the speakers.

Blaine’s POV:

It surprised Blaine just how comfortable he’d managed to get not only with Sebastian, but a little bit with himself, he’d gotten since January. The last two weeks were no different as he let Seb buy him dinners and kiss him breathless while asking gently for little touches here and there. Seb had stayed over three times since their Valentine’s date and had in return let Blaine cook for him each time, not only did Seb seem to genuinely enjoy each thing Blaine had made him, he seemed so incredibly appreciative and all of it made Blaine feel utterly and completely alien to himself. It wasn’t that he didn’t love the feeling, it was just so different from how he’d been feeling for going on four years now. The complete opposite of how he felt every demeaning day with Kurt.

After a little coaxing from Sebastian, some sweet words placed perfectly out in order to get Blaine to calm and say yes, he felt a little glimmer of of hope as he clung to Sebastian’s arm and they made their way into a crowded bar that Blaine had once come to with Sam in a failed attempt to feel something other than grief one night about eight months ago. Still, he’d liked it well enough and Sebastian had said all the right things to get him out. His face was still tingling with a blush over Sebastian’s compliments on how good he looked tonight and Blaine had struggled to find his voice to return the compliment. Seb was in blue and blue was always his color so of course his guy looked gorgeous standing tall next to him. Blaine wanted to tell him so, but lost his words before he could manage.

The bar was filled with bright colors and a hard bass thumped through the speakers and Blaine couldn’t help but nod along to the music. Even after all he’d been through, and how much of himself he’d lost- the music still seemed to sing in his veins and the call was too much to resist tonight. A part of him wanted to go out there and dance like he used to when he was younger, but the walls of people were making him feel a little panicky and his head felt a bit dizzy. How many of them would bump into him? What if one of them grabbed him and tried to make him dance with them? Seb pulled him out of his thoughts with a flash of his fingers and a gentle slip of them lacing with Blaine’s and tugging him towards the bar. Blaine knew all at once that Sebastian wouldn’t allow anyone else to get too close to him and a smile ghosted his face as he carried that thought.

He knew he shouldn’t drink because of his medication, but he wasn’t sure how else he’d manage to get himself out onto the dance floor otherwise. Sure, once he was there he might be fine, he might loosen up. But those first steps were always going to be the hardest. The shots and drinks tasted sweet and good as they slid down his throat and rested in the pit of his stomach. The burn hit him hard and fast and Blaine smiled up at Seb and took his offered hand and let him lead him to the dancefloor before he changed his mind. He felt a dash of disappointment that he hadn’t thought to look up the bar to see if there might be a theme.

“I think you might be right!” He sort of yelled, trying to be heard over the music. “I wish I had looked, I have the perfect pink shirt I could have worn.” He laughed a little, and turned so that he was facing Sebastian properly, his arms instantly reaching out to lock around the taller man's waist to bring them as close together as he could. Not wanting anyone else to get the chance to touch him or Sebastian. He swayed a bit, trying to get his hips to move with the music, his body feeling exposed in a way he hadn’t felt in a long time. He wasn’t sure if he liked it or if he was embarrassed by it and made sure to keep his gaze on Sebastian’s face so he wouldn't look down and see himself and get even more embarrassed. He pressed his hips just so into Seb’s so that Seb could guide him in the dance and his face heated up even more at the intimacy of it all. He was thankful it was mostly dark in here and Sebastian couldn’t see the permanent red tint to his cheeks.

Another night, another dream, but always you- it’s like a vision of love that seems to be true… The words pumped through Blaine’s body as the two of them moved so perfectly together, like they did this all the time. And with each spin and roll of their hips together Blaine could feel the alcohol and music soaking into his skin and blood and all at once he felt like he could do anything. Sweat was clinging to Sebastian’s hair and dripping down his face, making its way to his neck and it was so attractive Blaine wanted to catch it with his lips, wanted to let his tongue taste the saltiness. And Sebastian’s shirt was rising up and the line of his hip to his stomach was visible and Blaine wanted to run his fingertips over the other man's tummy, wanted to feel the dusting of hair against his fingers and god it was fucking hot in here… He licked his lips and pressed his face into the crook of Sebastian’s slender neck, the boldness of his thoughts taking him by surprise. He was uncomfortably hard and he wanted to do something about it. He didn’t dare follow up on them though.

As he clung to the green eyed man, still moving in time with him, he thought to himself that maybe, just maybe if he drank a little more he might be able to do it. He might be able to be as bold as his thoughts, he might be able to taste the salty curve of Seb’s neck, might be able to dip his fingers into the band of Seb’s pants. Might be able to get over his fear of intimacy… He tiptoed up so that his lips were next to Sebastian’s ear.

“After this song we should get more drinks. My treat this time? And then we can come back and dance even more. I, uh, like the way it feels.” Before settling back on his feet he let himself voice a little bit of his pleasure. “T-This feels really good... doesn’t it?” He mumbled and licked his lips again, hoping Seb could hear him. Hoping he knew what he meant.

Sebastian’s POV:

Sebastian took a deep breath and held on tight to Blaine’s hips as he pressed impossibly close to him. Sure, they had slept in the same bed together and cuddled on the couch, made out a whole bunch but they hadn’t gone any farther than that aside from their past. He was pretty proud of himself for staying calm and even deleting the dating apps he would frequent off of his phone. Sebastian’s nights after making out on the couch in the dim glow of Christmas lights were spent in cold showers and touching himself under his covers. Now, Blaine was all over him and sweaty and he could smell his cologne and hair gel and a few curls were escaping to bounce free and Sebastian thought he might come right there like an overexcited teenager.

“I’d love another drink.” He mumbled back, unsure if Blaine had even heard him over the thumping bass. All he could do was nod as he looked down at Blaine. Seb was relieved that the other man felt good and that this plan was successful so far. The song finished and Blaine pulled him towards the bar as ‘Pump Up The Jam’ started. Blaine leaned over the bar and ordered as a few party goers complimented Sebastian’s ‘Zack Morris costume’ to which he scoffed.. “I had no clue there was even a theme…” He tried yelling over the music before just waving his hands in dismissal.

“B, did you hear that shit?!”

Blaine’s POV:

Blaine ordered two more of the comedically named mixed drinks for each of them and then ordered three shots of vodka, two for him and one for Sebastian. He made sure the other man wasn’t paying attention and shot back one of the shots. Maybe if he got a head start he’d be able to loosen up. He watched Sebastian force a tight lipped smile to a few girls dressed in zig zags and too much neon, hearing the words Zach Morris and costume. He laughed, Sebastian’s face a canvas of annoyance and confusion. As Seb came closer Blaine handed him his shot and his drink. The second shot he’d taken was settling into the pit of his stomach and he could already feel the blurriness at the edges of his focus.

“Oh now that’s ridiculous...” He boldly cupped his hand around the back of Sebs neck and pulled him down for a kiss, feeling brave for doing it so boldly and grinning into the taste of sugary alcohol on Sebs lips. “You know that you’re so much hotter than Zach Morris.” His words were already a little too slow and very slightly slurred on the word ridiculous. He bit his lip, hoping he wasn’t making a huge mistake by drinking this much. He held up the hand that held his shot glass and indicated to Seb to do the same. “Here’s to my first real dance in about four years.” The vodka blazed down his throat, leaving a trail of fire in his lungs and a little bit more of his worries were covered up for the moment.

“Dance with me.” He grinned, and pulled Sebastian back out onto the dance floor as Be My Lover blasted through the speakers and bounced off of Blaine’s ear drums. Before he could think too hard about it, he slid his arms around Sebastian’s waist and pulled him close again, pressing his whole body against his. They’d been close during the last dance, but Blaine was determined to somehow get closer yet. He let his hips press into Sebastian’s and was surprised to find that Sebastian was just as hard as he was. He bit his lip and hid his face in the crook of Seb’s neck as he rolled his hips against him again, a little gasp of pleasure leaving his lips. And again all he could think about was how hot the club was, he was thankful for the coldness of his drink, numbing his fingers as they danced, their hips and bodies rolling in tune to each new beat. And Seb was so careful with Blaine, kept his hands on his hips or just around his waist and Blaine wanted to tip toe up and purr in his ear- please touch me.

And if Blaine could just get over it… If he could just allow himself to feel normal for a moment. If he could just let Sebastian touch him wherever he wanted, if he could just take him back to his house and let the taller man undress his body and touch and kiss him all over. They’d done it before when they were teens and it had been incredible. They’d been so in sync.

Still now though, drunk and blurry eyed, the thought of Sebastian looking at his naked body made him want to curl in on himself. He wanted him, goddamnit he wanted him but every single time he tried to make the leap he was right back in the bed he shared with Kurt, lying next to him afraid that he’d unknowingly messed up somehow that day, or he’d be told he was getting a belly from eating too many sweets and that maybe he should cut back, or he’d get the attention he craved only to be asked to lie on his stomach while Kurt took what he wanted and didn’t even bother to kiss Blaine during or after. Or he’d just be rejected and neglected all together. The thought made Blaine want to throw up and hide and those were the last things he wanted to do. He felt so damn good with Sebastian right now. All he wanted was to go home and have sex with his guy like a normal fucking person.

So he clung to Seb, and pressed little kisses against the slender, freckle dusted line of his neck, his fingers pressing into his hips to keep them close and he wasn’t sure how long they danced, but he’d finished off the rest of his mixed drink, the sweet burn tearing down his body in hopes that it would strip away his anxieties and finally, after trying to build up the courage to do it for five songs or more, he couldn't ‘t remember, Blaine finally let the tips of his fingers press against the exposed skin of Sebastian’s stomach. The simple touch sent such a thrill down his body and before his brain could catch up with his movements, he was full on open mouthed and sloppily kissing Sebastian like they were alone. A desire was building from his lips to his tummy and down to his toes. He was breathy and would have been so embarrassed with himself if he weren't so messily drunk now.

“God… Take me home, Seb. Please?” His voice was a whine of want and how the hell did he get drunk so fast?

Sebastian’s POV:

Seb was a little taken aback at how bold Blaine was being. Of course he liked it but he had to acknowledge that the alcohol was definitely playing a part. His own thoughts felt like they were starting to run a little slower than normal and his eyelids felt a little heavy. Seb told himself that after this round of drinks he needed to be done because he would keep going and going and going and what if he lost Blaine or made a shitty decision that he’d feel like garbage about the next day? It took more alcohol to get him wasted than it did Blaine and it was obvious he was a little bit past tipsy.

He kissed Blaine back and gripped his hips. “And you’re the hottest, B.” They made their toast with their shots and were suddenly back on the dance floor grinding and all over each other. Sebastian was trying his damndest to focus on the thrum of 90’s music but Blaine was kissing his neck, a place that drove him crazy and his music calloused fingers were trailing along his stomach and of course it was so simple but so fucking hot and he could feel Blaine against his thigh. Seb needed to drink some water or feel the cold night air on his red cheeks before he made a mistake.

Then they were kissing and he could taste vodka and that suddenly sent a jolt of patience through him. Blaine wasn’t sober and Sebastian wasn’t quite as drunk. “Blaine, I’ll take you home but...we can’t.” ….Fuck, he could cry with how badly he wanted Blaine. “I want to. Fuck, I want to so bad. I’m like aching to.” Sebastian swallowed and leaned down to press his forehead to the other man’s. “I’ll spend the night but we can’t go farther than kissing, okay? I don’t want you to regret anything.”

He called his car and got Blaine safely into the backseat. The car ride was filled with dirty whispers and kisses and giggles and Seb’s will was tested at every turn. They somehow made it up the stairs and into the other man’s apartment by some miracle. Sebastian kicked off his white vans and threw his coat over the back of the couch. “I’ll need to borrow some gym shorts, B.” Maybe it would distract Blaine’s one track, tipsy brain a little bit. “And we both need water.”

Blaine’s POV:

Blaine let himself smile as he and Sebastian rode back to his apartment. Sebastian was trying to cover himself with his hand, trying to cover that he was just as hard as Blaine was, meaning Blaine had done something right and that Blaine’s ill planned idea might work. He didn’t know what Sebastian meant by saying they could only kiss, he knew and could very much tell that he wanted more. He’d just have to try again once they were under the covers.

There was kissing and whispered words and Blaine knew he was slurring and that he couldn’t remember what he’d just said, only that it made Sebastian groan and his elven face bunch up with pleasure. He let Seb help him up the stairs, which was silly because he could totally get himself up there, he’d lived here for almost a year now, right? But for some reason his key isn't working and for some reason when Sebastian tried it it worked better. Stupid key.

He made a show of drinking half of the water bottle next to his bed and offing the other half to Seb. “You don’t need shorts, you don’t even really like clothes when you sleep, silly.” He grinned, and made his way over to Seb, his arms reaching for him, trying to bring him closer to him… And why wouldn’t Sebastian just touch him? Seb was the only one that could touch him. The only one that Blaine ever wanted to touch him again. Couldn't he see that? Please, just touch me. He tried again, moving so that he and Seb were sitting on the bed now. “Lie down with me…” His words were a mumble and his lips weren't quite connecting and suddenly Sebastian wasn’t wasn’t reacting back, and all it took was for Sebastian to firmly say the words “Not yet, B.” and shake his head and for him to very gently push Blaine away, all while making sure that he could see where his hands were, and Blaine’s sloppy mind caught up with his logical sense and he was suddenly very much aware of what he was doing and he felt so disgusted with himself.

Of course Blaine’s body still ached with so much fucking want while simultaneously it coursed with fear- and even thought his body still screamed touch me please oh my god touch me… His brain was catching up and he was not ready for this. He was so fucking thankful that Sebastian was a good person that was willing to stop him. Willing to take care of him even though he too was a little drunk and it couldn’t be easy with the way Blaine was throwing himself at him. And Blaine had to believe it wasn’t easy and that Seb wasn’t telling him no because he secretly didn’t want him.

Even knowing that Seb was right, that Blaine was drunk and wasn’t ready, and that he would regret all of this tomorrow it still made him feel like crying, it made him feel rejected and he suddenly the sticky sweetness of the alcohol was tearing it’s way back up his throat and he had to close his eyes to keep from throwing up. He wrapped his arms around himself as if it would protect his drunken emotions and keep him from getting sick. He swallowed down a hard, painful lump in his throat and shook his head, forcing himself to look over at Sebastian through his lashes. Every emotion was suddenly hitting him raw and hard and Blaine wanted to run.

“Why can’t I just be normal, Seb?” He sighed and went to press his hot face into Seb’s chest to hide his embarrassment before realizing that maybe he didn’t have the right to lean onto him for comfort so freely. Who was he to think he could take Sebastian’s comfort anyway? He wanted to curse at Kurt for making him this way, wanted to kick himself for letting it happen. He shook his head as if to shake off that last thought. He had been doing so well.

“I-I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have put you into this position, it’s not right. And now I’m just more confused than ever. I don’t know what I’m doing…” He let out a mirthless half laugh, half sob. “You are incredible and beautiful and I remember the way you looked and felt under me and I wanted it back tonight. I felt like I couldn't wait. I wanted the feeling of how happy I was back. I mean, I’m getting there emotionally, but physically? When I force myself to look in the mirror after showering, I just don’t like what I see. I still see the little pudge of tummy that made Kurt criticize me, yet I also see that I’ve lost too much weight… And I-I still see bruises.” He swallowed hard, pulling the blankets from the bed over his chest even though he still had his clothing on, he suddenly felt so very exposed. “So, I’m scared for you to see me, to really see me. My body… The thought makes me want to hide and I-I don’t know- I thought that if I just drank enough I’d get over my, um, my anxieties and my pain and that I’d just be able to do it. And it would be as perfect as it was when I was whole. Before my parents, before I went back to Kurt.” He sighed, his embarrassment growing at how stupid he was.

“I want to do it. I want you so bad, Seb. I want to be ready...” He closed his eyes trying to clear the queasiness and dizziness coursing through him. “And what's worse is that I was having so much fun dancing with you, feeling the music with you… and now I feel like I’m just holding you back again. I’ve ruined the whole night.”

Couldn’t he just get through one day without crying? Without freaking out, or fucking up? Why was Sebastian still here? Blaine truly felt like he’d just erased all of their progress. He should have been honest with Sebastian about drinking with his medicine. Maybe he would still be out there just dancing close to his boy if he had been. That had been enough.

Sebastian’s POV:

Sebastian let Blaine see his hands and gently pressed his palms against his chest, “Not yet, B.” He sat on the bed next to the other man who was obviously trying to hide himself under the covers. Sebastian took a deep breath, his wobbly mind suddenly very sober. He hated to see Blaine feel like this about himself, to see his eyes go glassy with tears and his cheeks redden from embarrassment. “To be fair, I don’t really know what I’m doing either. We’re both figuring things out and sometimes mess ups happen. Doesn’t mean we’re doomed.”

He lifted a hand so Blaine would notice and laid it on his chest over the covers. It was sort of an awkward angle but he wanted him to feel and see his affection. “I know that I can’t fix what your brain makes you see but, I love what I see when I look at you. You’re the beautiful one.” Sebastian looked down at Blaine and sighed. “Things...don’t need to be exactly how they were with us before and that’s okay. Trust me when I say that I want to see all parts of you. That means vulnerable you, sad you, angry you, naked you. All of it. I want you just as bad, I promise. I didn’t turn you down because I’m repulsed. Fuck no. B, I’m basically obsessed.”

Seb let go of a little nervous laugh he was holding back from being so bare. “This shit right here? This is scarier than being naked together. We’ll get there. Remember when I told you I have hands?” He lifted the hand on Blaine’s chest and wriggled his fingers, “over time, baby.” Sebastian hoped the crude joke would make the teary man laugh a little. “ We have time. About those shorts? Direct me to which drawer. You also need some Tylenol.” He stood up from the bed and leaned over to ask for a kiss before going off to rummage for supplies.

Blaine’s POV:

Blaine willed himself not to start crying full out as Sebastian spoke to him in such a soothing tone. His words cascading over him and feeling like the first breath after being smothered. Blaine, of course, knew that he was the one smothering himself. He was the one making problems for himself, no one else. Unless you counted Kurt, but Blaine was the one that was letting him slip in through his cracks each time. And here was Sebastian, also slipping through and making him feel the exact opposite of Kurts toxicity. If only he could hold onto the way Sebastian made him feel tighter and loosen his grip on his past. How wonderful would that be?

He let his eyes fall closed, lifted his hand to place over Sebastian’s nestled on his chest and leaned forward to nuzzle into him like he’d wanted to do before he talked himself out of it. He didn’t feel beautiful himself, but something in the way Sebastian said it, something about the word love being used to describe him made him feel the tugging's of hope and his grief over his behavior slowly eased up and he let himself soak the words in. Seb loved things about him, Seb thought he was beautiful even though he thought he was damaged goods and useless. Sebastian liked all the versions of Blaine, even his sadness and his pain, he was willing to work with him and try to help him.

“I love that you’re not trying to fix me. It’s important that you’re just here with me and letting me be what I need to be in the moment. You’re helping me realize when I’m being toxic to myself and that’s the most important thing. And I know we don’t need to be what we were, I just want to be us again. I want you in every way I can get you and I’m frustrated with myself for all the blocks I’ve put up to protect myself from Kurt, and how I can’t pull them down for you. You’re the only one worthy and I’m sorry I tried to take a shortcut, that’s not good for either one of us.” He shrugged, sitting up so he could go get the shorts for Seb, a faint smile dancing on his face because Sebastian wanted him, Sebastian touched himself and thought about him, Sebastian was obsessed. While he was sure that wasn’t exactly true, it still felt good that Seb thought so much of him. He found himself laughing in spite of himself. “Well, yeah, I know… And I’m glad that’s enough for you right, I just would like to be the one that makes you feel good sometime.” He licked his lips, and pressed a kiss to Seb’s jaw line. Seb was being vulnerable, and he was right, that was the scariest part. He supposed it was only fair to be honest with Seb.

“I took all of my medicines tonight, like I’m supposed to. And I probably should have told you so you could make sure I didn’t drink too much like an idiot. I know better, but I had a plan- a shitty one, so yeah. That’s why I got into the state. I should have told you. The next time we go dancing, and I want to go dancing with you again, I only get one drink and I have to sip it like I’ve been doing when we have drinks.” He handed the shorts to Seb and gathered his pajamas in his arms, allowing the other man to kiss him gently. “It’s a bad interaction and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. But, I’ve told on myself now. I guess that's that.” He laughed and nodded, his head feeling a bit heavy as he pointed out where the headache medicine was. He bit his lip as he stepped into his bathroom, a little frustrated with himself that he couldn’t just change in front of Seb. and as he tugged his flannel pants and long sleeved tee on he thought that maybe next time he could.

When he got back to his little bedroom Seb was already snuggled under the covers, on the side of the bed that was open and you could walk next to, the vulnerable side- leaving the side of the bed that was against the wall- the safe side, open for Blaine. He crawled up into the open spot, and turned so that he was facing Sebastian as he settled under the covers, the warmth making him feel a little drowsy. Seb pushed two pills towards him and a fresh bottle of water to which Blaine took, knowing he’d feel achy in the morning. He laid his head down on the pillow and reached out in the darkness so that his hand could snake around Sebastian’s waist. He remembered back to the night that Blaine couldn’t bring himself to let Seb just sleep in his bed with him because he was afraid of waking up scared, not knowing who was with him. And now… Seb was here, and he fit and Blaine would know without a doubt that the person in his arms was Sebastian. And while he was still scared, still nervous he might have some bad dream and get confused for a second, he knew as soon as Seb would wrap his arms around him he’d feel safe… And it hit him all at once that the had actually made so much fucking progress in such a short time. He smiled and decided he’d take a few steps forward to regain ground from the steps back he’d taken earlier. He was going out on a limb here and while it was scary, he had to have faith.

“You know- Sam asked if you were my boyfriend again. I know we never said that’s what we were when we were younger,” ( there were so many things they hadn’t said… the I love yous still hung there) “but we were, right? And I’d like to think the word doesn't really mean anything, because you were so much more than just my boyfriend, you were my person. Just mine. You still are, but, as I’ve aged, I realize it might give me a little bit of structure to be able to use it. To hold onto it.” He bit his lip, and pulled Sebastian closer to him, wrapping him completely up in his arms and looking into his green eyes by the glow of the white Christmas lights coming from his living room. “I guess I-I’m asking if I can call you that? Is that what we are?”

Sebastian’s POV:

Sebastian snuggled into Blaine’s side suddenly very tired after the dancing and drinking and talking. He felt relieved that everything was out in the air, a feeling he wasn’t used to. Seb liked to bottle everything up and hold it close and numb it down with various substances but now he had Blaine and he needed to be open and honest. It really was exhausting being a normal functioning fucking adult.

Blaine gathered him up in his arms and held him close and the bed was warm. Sebastian could hear his heartbeat and his voice in his chest as he talked. “We were, B.” He played with the hem of the other man’s shirt under the covers and had to fight the pull of sleep to get all of his words out. “Yeah, we are. We’re boyfriends.” Sebastian had to giggle to himself a little bit. On New Years if you would have told him he’d be tucked into Blaine Anderson’s bed saying the word boyfriend he would have probably cussed you out. But, here he was and he was content. He hoped Blaine was, too.

Blaine’s POV:

Blaine studied Sebastian’s face, just barely able to make out his delicate features in the glow of fairy lights. He looked sleepy and a little tipsy, his eyes glazed with the evening's festivities and onslaught of emotions. He also looked happy, a new kind of happy. Not elation, but this subtle feeling that resembled contentment and Blaine wasn’t sure he’d ever seen it on Seb’s face before, not even when they were younger and wild with their feelings. There was this little smile that tugged at the corners of Seb’s lips, creasing the skin where it stretched near his cheeks just so and Blaine wanted to trace his fingers over them so he could dream about that happiness. He realized he felt it too. A content, wholeness that he’d never felt before. God, he loved this man. How had he ever let him go? How had he not fought like hell to get him back? You were fucked up, Blaine. You’d lost both of your parents and didn’t feel deserving of happiness, you know this. Stop blaming yourself for everything and just breathe in and breathe out. You’ve got this… He’s back back, he’s in your arms and with you is where he wants to be. You’ve got another chance.

Seb’s words seemed to be a struggle, not because it seemed difficult for him to say but because the other man seemed exhausted and Blaine couldn’t blame him, he was ready to snuggle in and let sleep take him too. Blaine wondered if he should have waited until they’d woken up to ask, he guessed this was one thing the alcohol had actually helped with. His many nights wondering if they were exclusive and official finally had an end. Sebastian was his in mind, and now by name and hopefully body would be next. He just needed to learn to relax and know that Sebastian wasn’t going to hurt him. Wasn’t going to judge or make fun of him. Tonight had sort of proven that. The little giggle after the words boyfriends was the sound of an old favorite song sung by his favorite artist that he’d not heard in a long time and he wanted to play it over and over again.

“Sam’s gonna be so happy to hear that.” He bit his lip to fight his ridiculously relieved and over the moon delighted smile, hoping Seb knew just how happy he was too.

He leaned in, pressed a soft, fluttering kiss to Sebastian’s temple and before he knew it he was breathing evenly in time with his boyfriend, Sebastian tucked into his body safely as if Blaine was the protector this time.

/fin.

#Seblaine #Seblaine Para #seblaine canon divergence #twoblueheartslocked #colorsicantsee

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zerot0hero · 4 years ago

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ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE & WAR - POST FLOATING LANTERN GALA SELF PARA (MAY 2020)

tw: heart break, betrayal, self pity, revenge(?),

It was already dark when Hercules left the Gala, he descended down the stone steps with his hands in his pockets to the curving line of parked cabs waiting to pick up fares. He didn’t feel like talking to anyone, he could have turned back and found Oliver amid the crowd to confide in but that meant risking seeing Megara-- and she was the one person he really couldn’t bring himself to talk to right now. He stood at the bottom of the entrance, turning back around to face it, wondering if leaving had been the right choice? He could have stayed and danced with Pascal, had idle chit chat and a drink with Kit, made sure Oliver didn’t bring himself to any harm or actually had the chance to wish the Princess a Happy Birthday… but his heart was no longer in it.

With a disappointing sigh he turned back around and began to make his way to the end of the property, unkownling missing the beautiful sight of lanterns rising in the sky behind him. Had he stayed it might have been a sign of hope, but now in the chilled air and soft breeze he continued to walk towards Downtown Elias. Every store was closed, every street he passed was almost empty apart from a few bars where people stood outside smoking, there were very little cars on the road so as he passed each streetlamp alone on the way to his apartment he tried to count them. Hercules would have done anything to distract himself of thinking about Megara, about how beautiful she looked in her purple dress, about how she blushed when he placed the corsage on her wrist, about how close she was to him when they slow danced and about how he wished that moment could have last forever.

Much to his dismay the magical evening came to a disturbing end when Megara confessed the truth to Hercules, that she was working for his Uncle Hades, the guardian of the Underworld. As Megara spilled the painful truth everything began to make sense to him, being stolen from Mount Olympus as a baby and stripped of his God Title, Megara taking a keen interest in Herc and his life, Hades being extra quiet. He did not have to raise a finger when he was making Herc’s dear Megara do all the dirty work. Hercules was angry, furious even, more livid than he had ever been in his entire life. He felt anger, betrayal, hurt and disappointment all at once, however it was his own fault for disregarding his training and letting himself become distracted by a modern day Siren, luring him to his death by deranged Uncle.

Philoctetes had tried to warn Hercules in the past about the effects of beautiful women on a man's brain but he had waved them off with little concern. Hercules had never had any luck with women until Megara and that was only because she literally did not have a choice but to flirt with him. As grateful as Hercules was for her warning about Hades trying to kill him he could not work out if that was part of the plan? Was he supposed to know this, or did Megara really risk her own soul for him? He wanted to believe there was goodness in her heart, that she was really only doing Hades bidding against her will… but then Herc had to remember Hades did not take her soul for nothing, Megara had willingly trusted him for a favor. And could a person who trusted someone like him, a monster who kidnaps and tries to assassinate innocent children, be a person worth trusting at all? His heart and head were being torn apart.

As Hercules reached his apartment he beelined for the small kitchen decorated in white marble and black appliances. Opening the liquor cabinet he reached for a short glass and the bottle of Ouzo, a heavy and dangerous drink if you have too much, Greek liquor. He placed them both on the counter and began to pour a large measure into the glass, he unbuttoned the top of his shirt and dropped his jacket over a dining chair as he walked with his glass to the living room. Slumping onto the couch in the darkness Hercules could see the faint glow of the stars in the sky-- not stars, lanterns. Some of them must have been let off late, he wondered if Megara took part, his friends, what they had hoped for-- and realised his own wish would have been incredibly selfish.

Hercules wanted Megara to love him. He wanted unconditional love, the promise of a future, vacations to cancun, spending too much money on chocolate on St. Valentine’s day. He wanted the lazy sunday lie-ins, brunch by the seafront, to carry all of her bags when she went shopping. He wanted bad movie dates, to get soaked in the rain with her and give her his jacket, to order an extra set of fries at dinner in case she changed her mind and tried to eat his. He wanted the movie trope romance, all the good and all the bad because Hercules wanted so badly to be loved by Megara the way he was beginning to fall in love with her. He shut his eyes and pictured her standing alone on the dance floor with tears in her eyes, now he felt like the monster for leaving her there.

“Oh Megara-- you are my weakness…” he sighed to himself, swirling the liquid around his glass. He was conflicted, on one side Hercules wanted nothing to do with her anymore. To rip off the bandaid and cut all ties… but on the other side he knew he could not let her be bound to Hades for the rest of her life. No matter what her part was in his Uncle’s plan being held by your will was an extortionate price to pay for asking a God for a favor. He couldn’t walk away from the situation knowing that harm could come to his dear, dear, Megara. If nothing else she deserved a clean slate, even if that meant their flirtationship would never evolve to anything more. Even if it meant she would run away to Tasmania and he would never see her again, helping her was the only option he had.

Hercules downed the liquor with a quick flick of his wrist and hissed as the alcohol ran down his throat, leaving behind a burning sensation. He had no time to wallow in his own emotions and self-pity, if his Uncle was truly coming for him and if he wanted to save Megara from the fate he barely escaped as a child he needed to act fast. Prepare, train, find allies, create an impenetrable plan that would stop his Uncle once and for all-- and most importantly ensure Megara would be safe and sound. He stood up, grasping at the wall for balance and wobbled his way towards the desk at the end of his room, reaching for a pad of paper and a pen he began to write exactly how he was feeling before he forgot.

When he was finished he folded up the letter and placed it in a small white envelope to deliver it the next morning. He kicked off his shoes and closed the blinds in his bedroom seeing the sky begin to change from a light purple to a bright orange in the distance indicating dawn-- how long had been up? He flopped onto the bed still in his shirt, socks and trousers and begged for sleep. Just a few hours left of normality before he would get up and start his new mission: Destroy Hades.

Dear Megara,

Aplogises for not contacting you sooner I wanted to text you but the temptation to call you was too great… and I didn’t think that would be wise for me to do at this time.

I wanted to apologise for ditching you at the gala. It was wrong of me to act so rash and leave you there. I was in shock. Finding out my uncle wants to harm me was a hard pillow to swallow but finding out you have working with him was what really stung. I understand the nature of your agreement and I apologise for how he chooses to make his demands – I promise not all gods are as cruel.

What I really wanted to confess to you is perhaps why I reacted the way I did. You see Megara… I was falling for you hard, fast and stupid. I would have done anything you asked me to, which in hindsight is probably better that you know this now rather than earlier. This is why I felt so betrayed and why I was so hurt. I guess what I am trying to say is that I think I was in love with you – and I foolishly thought you might have been in love with me too.

I will keep my word and try to save your soul from Hades, you deserve better than to be treated like a pawn in a game between Gods. Please understand why I cant see you anymore.

I am sorry that it has to be this way. I hope that I can retrieve what is rightfully yours so you have the power to make your own choices once again. Hold onto that hope if you find it difficult.

Thank you for the light you brought into my world . I will miss your smile.

All my best,

Hercules.

#self para #tw self pity #tw revenge #tw betrayal #tw heartbreak #u know once bre starts making me feel things i have to write it aLL DOWN #also this was meant to be months ago.....!!! oop!!#anyway Herc is doing better now dw guys hes still a little heartbroken but hes recovering like a God #which roughly translates to GYM GYM GYM

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1358456 · 4 years ago

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Review Response, June 21-27, 2020

Well, I guess the DE update doesn’t exist. So I’ll see that story again in Valentine’s Day.

But a miracle has happened in this week, so... yay!

Destiny #017

1) Hi! I know, long time no see. I’m incredibly sorry for not reviewing sooner, but I guess better late than never, huh? In any case I’m here to stay! Reading this chapter reminded me of how interesting this story really is and I can’t wait to read more. But seeing as it’s been some time I’m going to reread it in order to freshen my memory (I decided to review anyways since I can still review the quality of your fic, which is as I remember, very good). I admit when Peter first mentioned that Ruby was easy to control because of his lack of control over his emotions (and whatnot) unlike Sapphire, I was a bit confused. Wouldn’t it be the other way? I thought to myself, but then I remembered that Sapphire had done some growing up herself. She might’ve not had as much control previously but she certainly does now. As this was kinda proven later on when she was contemplating on what emotion she should be feeling at the moment. And this can be seen as indecision, but I rather thought that this was proving your previous statement correct and that this was her way of finding a little control of the situation. Speaking of what happened a bit later, I was pleasantly surprised of Blue sparing Sapphire’s sanity. I always had hope in Blue despite her obvious turning... but this really proves that Blue can (and most likely will) realize that despite Peter’s kindness she’ll have to betray him because what he’s doing simply isn’t right. I realize now that she probably also followed him because of him brainwashing her, but I can’t remember this particular detail... damn maybe I should’ve reread this before reviewing. Ah well, I’m this far into it anyways. In any case, although this chapter was short I fully enjoyed it. Especially Y’s inner monologue at the end. I do have a soft spot for light angst :’) (I’m sure you can call it that, right...?) so, thank you!

WELCOME BACK!! Yes, it’s always better late than never. After all, as I said before...

I’LL WAIT A THOUSAND SUMMERS!

For Ruby and Sapphire’s “control” issue, I was actually thinking about their little Hidden Power interaction. Sapphire has strong intuition and instincts, and is in full control of her senses. Or at least that was a part of it, anyways. This chapter was written years ago, so I don’t remember all the details. Hehe.

As for Blue... There’s a little character arc for her across all of my stories. If you read my stories in order of creation, you can kind of see it. First is when she’s neglected and is just rolling with it while feigning cheeriness (SE/SA/SR), but then it just piles up and she goes into depression (SA/SL/Destiny), then she kind of snaps and goes rampant (SL/Destiny), then she finds the one piece of true happiness in her life and starts to turn it around (Destiny), and eventually successfully attains happiness and stays that way (Destiny/Legacy). So you’re at the moment in Destiny where Blue has gone rampant but is trying to turn it around.

... I think I need to reread this story too. Hehe. I don’t really remember what happens in each chapter... except for a certain few, that is.

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Destiny #018

1) That’s... awful... Poor Y, who was already suffering so much, both physically and mentally. She didn’t even get to hear X say what he wanted to say to her. And if they don’t meet again she’d live the rest of her life not truly knowing where she stood with X. Always filled with guilt. Such is the sadness of the situation, but I can still hope! Hope that Y will meet X again and he’ll be able to tell her his thoughts. Though come to think of it, poor X too. He’ll have to speak with his seniors and he’s obviously really uncomfortable with that and doesn’t even have Y around to help him. Welp, to go to another depressing topic there’s also Sapphire’s situation to discuss. It is at the point not that disobeying Peter *would* be interfering with his plans, since it’s crucial that Sapphire be broken. Will Blue be able to disobey? Impossible to know, you can only hope that she does. On another topic, after rereading the fic (oh god I’d forgotten how long this was, it’s truly amazing the dedication you’ve had for this fic) I kept thinking back to Peter’s “blank eyes” you mentioned in the earlier chapters. This is a vague and rather shoddy theory, but the only thing I could think that would be the cause of the blankness is him being brainwashed as well. This is rather obvious, but this leads to who might be brainwashing him. Clearly this would be someone (or something..?) that would benefit from the restoration of the legendary’s and this would bring us to suspect #1: Zygarde. Now, I haven’t actually read the XY arc nor played the game (ik ik but I can still have a fellow feeling for X and Y) so I don’t know what this dude is capable of, but I can assume that this is within the realm of possibilities. And it would make sense with the whole blinking lights thing that Blue noticed that was going on a couple chapters ago. ‘Cause I mean, why else would this random guy help the legendaries, it’s all just a bit too sketchy. I am no detective, so I think these are fairly obvious, but they’re all I have going for me right now. This was a lovely chapter (writing of course, I can hardly apply that to the atmosphere), and I can’t wait to read the next one.

Poor Y indeed. Really. Poor Y... hehehe...

Destiny’s not THAT long, is it? ... 220 000 words... well, it’s not longer than SA which has 225 000, but... that difference is practically negligible. ... I wonder how long Legacy would end up... Anyways.

I don’t know if it’s obvious or not. I have a hard time with that. Sometimes I put in obvious hints in my stories and no one catches on. Sometimes I put vague hints in my stories and no one catches on. So I can’t tell if it’s subtle or blatant. I think for the Mega Hunter, there were a lot of subtle and blatant ones.

Now for Zygarde... well, the Neural Para... er... mind control is not really in its arsenal. Destiny’s plans were written shortly after XY games were released. Zygarde was kind of worthless there, but given what happened with Kyurem, I suspected that it would get a cooler new form. But then in SM, it turned out that its cooler new form was just a massive health buff. And it still gets annihilated by Xerneas, so... pfft. But I think I used its signature moves pretty well. Especially, say... Core Enforcer. Hahaha.

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Destiny #019

1) Ok, first of all, WHAT KINDA QUESTION IS THAT? How can I choose? Both options of your review survey thing are so sad... but after a moment’s thought, I think the second option is better. If Y were to continuously push herself then she’d just die. End of story. But with the second option, although incredibly risky and kinda pointless for X to go save her, the chances of them both staying alive are possibly higher, and Y would know Ax’s true feelings. This I think, would be what you referred to as the “happy ending”. Unless you actually said it outright that it’s the opposite and I just completely missed it. But anyways I’ve spent enough on Y’s situation lmao. I think I might switch over to Blue now, because something has been nagging me for a while. I feel like slapping this woman. I know she’s partially under the control of Peter (or assuming that my previous theory is correct, Zygarde’s), but, murder? Thankfully she admitted this chapter that she was, in fact, NOT wanting to murder anyone. But when she let anger blind her she was quite willing to do away with Green. And she has reason! Was Green did to her was beyond shitty, but killing him is just a little overtop. And she tried to justify it by saying, “Peter is the only one that has been kind to me” so it’s ok that I betray even my closest friends whom I’ve known for years even if I haven’t kept much in contact (besides Silver smh). She clearly knows what Peter is doing is wrong and while I don’t think that anyone is a saint and everyone makes mistakes, I’m still thinking “come on”. Plus, it’s not difficult to see how Peter’s kindness is really just a way to benefit him. Though I can let that one slide since it’s easy to fool yourself. Despite all that, later on in the chapter after feeling annoyance at Blur for seriously trying to blame Y for wanting to give X back *his* Mega Ring (plus why do they call it ring) just because it’d been a gift to her (and reminding myself that she also had reason to feel that way but whatever) it was very nice to see her being selfless. Which might be an awful thing to ask of her now, but it was the right thing to do. And that’s gratifying on its own, right? I feel as if these reviews have started to just be me ranting at this point. Can you still enjoy these..? But honestly there isn’t much to review at this point. I’ve touched a lot on your actual writing in past reviews, and since it’s the same fic the style hasn’t exactly change. Though I can still admire how seamlessly you seem to write, even while changing point of views. Quickly changing scenes from something a little peaceful, to a battle, which you are able to describe in detail and yet still be engaging. Ah, I got kind of sidetracked, didn’t I? In any case all I have yet to do is speculate what’s going to happen next, but alas, I have no idea. I assume there’s a somewhat happy ending, with a final battle with Peter and the legendaries, not to mention the plot twist. Guess I’ll just have to wait and see.

Huh? ... Oh right. The review survey. Hahaha. Second option, huh? I think I remember most people choosing that option. But... if you look at the choices, it seems pretty clear, right? And I just love to break expectations. Hehe...

Now, as for what’s happening with Blue, it’s explored a lot more in the upcoming chapters, with everything being explained in... 25? 26? And I do believe that all the issues you have will be resolved.

Hehe. Asking a girl, who after being neglected for years is finally trying to find some happiness for herself, to be selfless? How awful! Hahaha.

Of course I still enjoy these! Despite being called “reviews”, they’re more like “comments”, really. Just tell me what you liked about each chapter, what you didn’t like, what you hope to see in the future, what you don’t want to see, and/or just your thoughts/feelings while reading. So precisely what you’ve been doing already. It’s fine~! :)

I greatly look forward to seeing more!

#qna

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fanficsaremylifeline · 5 years ago

Text

Back to the Future

On AO3:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20668217

*****

“Dad, Rafe took my book!”

“I’m just borrowing it”, Rafael snickered as he held the book high over his head. His little brother tried to claw at him, tried getting the book back down, but Max stood no chance. It was really funny, Max was so angry that his normally blue face turned purple.

“Rafael, stop teasing your brother”, Dad called from the kitchen.

“I’m not teasing, we’re training”, Rafe claimed, very aware that it wasn’t exactly what they were doing, and it was definitely not his intention to teach his brother any fighting skills.

“Oh, if we’re training….” Max’s eyes lit up and his purple magic-thingy started lighting up all around him.

“Oh, no, no, that’s not fa… AAAAH!”

Max threw himself at his brother with everything he had, taking both of them down.

“BOYS! If you break anything you’ll be in serious trouble!”

Rafe heard Dad walk over, but he was too busy wrestling with his brother, who seemed to be positively buzzing with magic.

“Uh, Max, might want to dial it down a notch, alright?”

“DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!”, Max cried out and all of a sudden, the entire living room seemed to burst into purple flames and Rafe just squeezed his eyes shut, hearing only his brother’s screaming and the magic whooshing around them.

And then it all dropped away. Cautiously, he glinted through and half open eye, finding they were outside, between a bunch of trees; Max was still lying on top of him. Great, another fight-turned-involuntary-portalling. Max really had to learn to get a hold of his magic, get it under control; this was the third time this month he had gotten so mad that he portalled them away.

“Where did you portal us to?”

But his brother didn’t answer.

“Max?”, he tried again. “MAX!” With all the power he could muster up, Rafael rolled Max off him, who lay motionless beside him.

“Hey, ven para acá; open your eyes, you blue idiot!”

But nothing. Thankfully, he had a steady pulse and breath, maybe he just overexerted himself. But while portalling through the city? Taking a better look at their surroundings, Rafe could see that the portal brought them to a field, not far from the institute. During the summertime, they often trained out here, so since they were fighting, his subconscious must have brought them here.

Well, then Rafael’d carry Max to the institute to get him checked out and call Dad or Papa to pick them up. Man, Rafe was strong for a thirteen-year-old, but Max wasn’t that much smaller than him, so it took Rafael twice the time it usually did to get to the institute.

And then it got weird: he couldn’t get in. Normally, the doors would just open for them, their father was head of the institute after all and all wards were created to accept Max’s magic, hell, most of the time Max helped Papa with the wards!

So, he had to wait awkwardly after ringing the bell, kneeling down with Max’s head in his lap.

Finally, the door opened. “What’s going on here?”

So relieved to hear Aunt Izzy’s voice, he looked up, only to stop dead in his movements. That wasn’t Aunt Izzy. Yes, she sounded like her, looked like her, but that woman in front of him was no older than twenty.

“What happened to him?” She kneeled down and gently stroked Max’s head.

“I’m not sure. We were training and all of a sudden we’re here and he’s passed out.” Rafael was close to tears. First Max is unconscious and now Aunt Izzy isn’t really Aunt Izzy.

“Hey, it’s alright”, she assured him, “he’ll be up and running in no time.” She gently took the little Warlock in her arms and motioned for Rafael to follow her. “I’m Isabelle by the way.”

“I’m Rafael. This is Max.”

“Oh, that’s funny, my brother’s name is Max, too.”

Yeah, guess why Blue over there is called that. Wait, was Uncle Max still alive? Dad told them that his little brother, after which Rafe’s little brother was named, died around the time Rafael was born. So, how did Aunt Izzy talk about him like he was still alive?

“Izzy, what’s going on?”

Rafael couldn’t remember a time he was happier to hear his Dad’s voice, even if he sounded super grumpy. He just wanted to run over there, bury himself in his Dad’s arms, let the tears run wild; all while Dad would hold him close, gently tousle his hair, telling him how everything would be alright. But when he turned the corner, his hopes dropped: That wasn’t his Dad, not really at least. Just like Aunt Izzy, he was way too young. He also felt different. Like, he was so grumpy, the pure commanding Shadowhunter, something Rafael only saw on Dad when there was a big mission.

“Who are they?”, he demanded to know and if Rafe wasn’t devastated a moment ago, he was now. WE ARE YOUR KIDS, DAMNIT!

“They were just at the door; we need to get this one to the med bay.”

“Ok, you take him there and you”, he turned to Rafael, “answer me some questions.”

“No”, he refused, “I’m not leaving him alone.”

“It’s just for a little…”

“I’M NOT LEAVING MY BROTHER!”, Rafael yelled and determined, he grabbed the little blue hand.

“Your brother?” Both Izzy and Dad’s face fell at that and Rafe just nodded silently in response.

“Alright then”, Dad shrugged, “let’s get to the medbay while you tell us how a Shadowhunter and a Warlock are siblings.

Because of you, you idiot! Rafe wanted to shout. He’d never say something like this to his Dad’s face, but that wasn’t his Dad, now, was it?

But it brought the next problem. He couldn’t just tell them their story; he didn’t even know where they were! Was it a parallel world? But Aunt Clary went to a parallel universe once, and what she told them sounded very differently to this here. The only difference was, that everybody was a lot younger. So, they probably travelled to the past. And that was nothing, he could just explain to them. What was Rafe supposed to say? “Hey Dad, we’re your kids. From the future.” Uncle Simon would believe him, he was enough of a nerd and geek to buy into all that time travel stuff. But that wouldn’t help them get back!

Overcome with a very sudden burst of homesickness, Rafe couldn’t stop the tears anymore.

“Hey, kid, everything will be alright”, Dad assured him and put a hand around the teens shoulder. Even though it wasn’t really Dad, it felt just as soothing and helped Rafe calm down.

“I’m Alec”, he introduced himself.

Yeah, no. Rafe would not call his Dad by his first name.

“I’m Rafael. That’s Max”, he eventually got out. “We’re adopted, that’s how we’re siblings. We were fighting and suddenly we’re out on that lawn and Max is unconscious. So, I brought him here.”

“Very smart, Rafael”, Aunt Izzy praised him. “That must have been one hell of a portal, it completely drained his magic. He’ll be out for a little while, but he’s alright.”

“Good”, Rafael smiled, “I guess we’ll just take over a guest room for the night.”

“Uhm…” Dad hesitated, looking from one to the other. “It’s just, Downworlders aren’t allowed to stay here.”

“WHAT? SINCE WHEN?”

“Since always?”, Dad explained, pulling his face into the same grimace he did when Max introduced them to his imaginary friend Saskatoon. Apparently, he was a green, feathered Seelie, why he was named after a Canadian province, nobody knew. “It’s the same rule as in every other Institute.”

Man. They really landed in the dark ages, didn’t they? Unbelievable…

“Well, I’m not leaving his side”, Rafael made clear.

“Alec, the boy just needs a place to sleep.”

“Yeah, you’re right”, he agreed with Aunt Izzy and carefully scooped Max into his arms. “Come on, Rafael, I’ll show you were you can stay the night.”

After being repeatedly assured that Max was alright, Rafael followed Dad out to the dining hall. Until a few moments ago, he hadn’t even realized how hungry he was, all overshadowed by the worry for his little brother.

“You the little Shadowhunter with the Warlock brother?” Uncle Jace put his spoon down and eyed Rafael curiously.

“I’m Rafael”, he nodded, sitting down next to Dad, just opposite Uncle Jace.

“So, these strange kids just happen to show up when we found the Cup and you let them right in. The fuck is wrong with you?”, he hissed.

“Dude, watch your language”, he answered with a nod towards Rafael. Yup, this was his Dad right there.

“For reals?” Uncle Jace raised his eyebrow, shooting Dad some very quizzical looks.

“Jace, they are kids in need of help. What, I’ just gonna leave them outside?”

“Or maybe Valentine send them to infiltrate the Institute.”

“Says the guy doing the same with Valentine’s daughter”, Dad scoffed.

Oh, they had to be kidding him! What’s wrong with them? “Right”, Rafael interrupted the bickering, “of course we’re working for Valentine. Especially my little warlock brother loves working for someone who hates Downworlders to that extreme a degree. And why wouldn’t I be in league with someone who caused my family nothing but pain and is responsible for me being orphaned and living on the streets for the first five years of my life?” Ok, technically that was on Jonathan. But Jonathan was on Valentine, so… “So yeah, we’re definitely working for him. Dios mio”, he added with a quiet grumble.

At least now Uncle Jace was quiet and Dad patted Rafe’s shoulders. He felt quite proud of himself and happily dug in.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

“Ok, dude, seriously. We have more urgent business than looking after some weird brothers who just happen to show up on our doorstep.”

“Keep your voice down.”

Alec and Jace were leaning against the wall just outside the guestroom, after quickly checking in on the two sleeping kids. The Shadowhunter boy was wrapped around the Warlock kid, holding him close; he was really protective of his little brother. And weirdly enough, Alec felt the same way about those kids. Which went against every fibre of his training, his entire being. He should be worried about Valentine spying on them, but instead he just wanted to call up every institute until he found their parents.

“What, you going all soft and fatherly on them?”, Jace snorted.

“Shut it.”

“No, I mean you are engaged now, domesticity might come in handy. But, if you do want to reconsider”, Jace winked as he walked away past Alec, “looks like the Shadowhunter-Warlock-combination works out pretty good.”

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

When Max managed to open his eyes, he found himself wrapped up in Rafe’s arms.

“Rafa?”

His voice seemed to have woken him he groggily opened his eyes but started to smile as soon as he saw Max. “Hermano! Been sleeping enough, haven’t you?”

Max got out of his brother’s arms and wearily sat up. “What happened? Are we at the Institute?”

“Sorta…” Rafe had a skew grin on his face and stared on his fingers.

“What happened?”

“You portalled us back to the past.”

“I did WHAT?”

“Shhh”, Rafe tried shutting him up, “nobody can know! It’s the beginning of the Mortal War, Uncle Jace is a bobo and as far as I can tell, Dad and Papa aren’t together yet.”

“I…” Max was completely dumbfounded. What did he do? How, and… Shit. He messed up. He messed up big time! “I’m sorry”, he choked out as the first tears started rolling down his cheek.

“Hey, it’s ok, it’s alright!” Rafa wrapped his arms around Max and soothingly rubbed his back. “We’re gonna figure out how you did this and find a way back home, alright?”

“Ok”, Max sniffled, pressing his face against his brother’s shoulder. Focusing on Rafa’s breathing, he even managed to calm down a little bit and leaned back, wiping the tears off his face. “Wait.” Slowly he processed everything Rafael had just told him. “Uncle Jace is a bobo?”

“Yeah, listen, things are all sorts of trippy. Downworlders aren’t allowed in the institute and they actually think we’re Valentine’s spies.”

“Seriously?”

“I tell you, dude, we landed in the dark ages.”

Downworlders aren’t allowed in the institute? Which was basically his home? Max didn’t even know what to think, much less what to say. He didn’t want this weird, this wrong world, he wanted his Dad, his Papa, his institute, where people were happy to see Max! “Let’s just get home”, he mumbled and climbed out of bed. Rafael was right there taking his hand.

“Let’s go and find Dad, so he can let us out, because the wards don’t accept you yet.”

“This place is terrifying.”

And it was even worse. The looks Max got were pure poison. Rafael had his arm around him and Max tried his best to hide behind his older brother, but it was brutal. Yes, Papa told him that a few years ago Nephilim weren’t really big fans of the Downworld, but this? This was hatred, pure and simple. And for the first time in ten years, he was scared to be at the Institute, a place where he should feel safe and at home!

He was just so damn glad that Rafael kept it together so well, getting them both through this; if it weren’t for Rafa, Max would probably be balled up on the ground, crying his eyes out.

They eventually found Dad in the armoury with Aunt Izzy and Uncle Jace.

“Just remember”, Raf hissed over before they walked inside, “this isn’t Dad, not yet at least, so, just stay calm.”

“Mhm…” It was Dad, though! Looked like Dad, moved like Dad, sounded like Dad... Up until now, a part of him thought Rafa was just messing with him but that was Dad right there, with Aunt Izzy and Uncle Jace; all of them looking so much younger… And it took all of his power to keep from crying and running up into Dad’s arms. His brother seemed to notice and wrapped an arm around him.

“Hey, you’re up!” As they walked inside, Dad turned to them with a wide smile. “How are you feeling?”

Max couldn’t even look at his father and kept himself as hidden behind Rafael as he could, trying to hide as much of himself as he could. “’m alright”, he mumbled.

“We just wanted to say thanks and get going. After all, it’s not like he’s welcome here, so as grateful as we are for all your help, we should go now.”

“No, you’re not”, Jace decided. “Not until we know who you are, where you’re from and what your deal is.”

Rafa was right, Uncle Jace was a bobo.

“Take it down a notch”, Aunt Izzy calmed him. “Though I have to say, he has a point. You show up in the middle of chaos, you just turn up out of nowhere.”

“And no offense”, Jace shot over, “but I was hoping that Simon turning was the only Downworlder issue I had to handle. Besides the wedding”, he added with a scoff.

“Wedding?”

Max and Rafael knew about the story of Simon being turned into a vampire. But if he remembered correctly, there was no wedding.

“Well, I don’t care about Clary’s mundane, or vampire or whatever and my wedding has nothing to do with Downworlders.”

“It should”, Aunt Izzy mumbled, rolling her eyes.

“You are getting married?” Didn’t Rafael say something about their fathers not even dating yet?

“I am. What’s it to you?”, he shot back.

“Nothing.” Apologetically, Rafa raised his hands and sat back down next to Max. “Who’s the lucky one?”

“Lydia Branwell.”

“WHAT?”, the brothers cried out in unison and Rafa just kept going: “You are engaged. To a woman? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Oh, Dad would definitely ground Rafe for ever for using the F-Word. But seriously, engaged, to a Shadowhunter woman? They never told any of them about that…

“Oh, this is nothing of your concern! So, you all are gonna shut it now, because this is officially too much. We’re gonna check all the wards and you to make sure you’re clean and then you can go.”

“I’ll call Magnus”, Aunt Izzy shrugged.

“And you two just sit and stay quiet.” Oh, yes, now he sounded like their Dad. Thankfully, Aunt Izzy got Papa here, so they could end all of this chaos. They had to, otherwise they might never be a family, ever!

“And here I go again, getting you Shadowhunters out of your messes.” Papa walked in and damn, if it was possible, he was even more dramatic and extra as Max knew him. But he looked the same! Sort of at least, the love he could usually feel from Papa was not there, instead he seemed cold and closed off. And it broke Max’s heart.

“It’s not Papa”, Raf whispered over, but he looked just as distraught as Max felt.

“Who do we have here?” Papa turned to them with a wide smile.

Not being recognized by his own Papa was worse than losing out to Rafa every time they sparred. But no, Max would not start crying right now. It was not his parents’ fault that they didn’t know them, it was all on Max. And while Rafael took charge and took care of them, he should at least keep it together, he owed his brother that much.

“I’m Rafael, that’s my brother, Max.”

“Huh.” An amused smile played over Papa’s lips. “A Shadowhunter and a Warlock. Interesting”, he remarked with a side eye to Dad.

“Can you please make sure that they didn’t screw with our wards?”

“Of course. You definitely look like hardened criminals and traitors”, Papa grinned and winked at the boys before turning around and that familiar blue magical flames danced around his fingers. Max felt the tickle, when his Papa’s magic scanned him, and basked in finally feeling something familiar, even homey.

“Well, they are clean, I’ll go and check the wards.” Papa sauntered off, brushing very closely past Dad, who actually blushed. Oh, thank the Angel, they are in love! But why would Dad get engaged to someone else?

“What is going on with Dad?”, he hissed over at Rafael, when the grown-ups were engaged in a discussion.

“I don’t know. And Papa? He’s next level pissed with him. Like, seriously pissed.”

“I know… It was nice to feel his magic, though”, Max smiled.

“You actually felt that it’s specific Papa’s?”

“Yeah”, he nodded, “it feels different from Madzie’s or Catarina’s; it’s like a thumbprint.”

“Cool! I didn’t know that.”

“Figured”, he hissed back. There was a lot of stuff about Warlocks his brother didn’t seem to know or care about, but that didn’t matter right now; they could fight when they got back home.

“Wards are alright.” Papa waltzed back in, making it a point to ignore Dad.

“Great, so we can go, right?” Rafael got up and pulled Max to his feet.

“I guess. Are you sure you’ll be alright, though?” Dad looked concerned and put his hand on either shoulder.

Can you please just give me a hug and say you love us?

“Yeah, we will”, Rafael nodded “Thanks again for everything, we really appreciate it.”

“Sure thing. Stay safe, alright?”

The brothers just nodded.

“Come on, I’ll walk out with you.” Papa nodded towards the elevator, gesturing for them to follow.

“Bye”, Max waved at his Dad, Uncle and Aunt and his hand in Rafael’s, they followed Papa outside and Max was never happier to leave the Institute and all its evil looks behind.

“So”, Papa remarked as they were a bit away from the institute, “something is going on here. Your magic”, he locked eyes with Max, “it’s like mine. We’re literally compatible. How is that?”

Uh… Max felt his face drop and looked up at Rafael, who also seemed like he didn’t know what to say, either.

“I have no idea”, Max shrugged, trying to look innocent and nonchalant, but from the grin on Papa’s face he could see that he looked right through it. Man, even though he didn’t know him yet, his Papa could read him like an open book.

“Mhm, funny coincidence”, he chuckled. “So, where are you heading off to?”

“Home”, Rafa smiled, “I miss my Papa.”

“I bet you do. Will you find the way?”

“Yeah”, Max nodded, “I’m alright with a portal.”

“Of course you are”, Papa grinned. “Take good care then, you two, alright?”

“Always. Oh, and, Magnus?” Uh, it felt weird, hearing Rafael addressing Papa by his first name. “I can tell that Alec is really into you. Completamente enamorado.”

“He is”, Max agreed, “don’t give up just yet.”

“I’ll see you two crazy kids around”, Papa smiled, turned around and disappeared through a portal.

“Uff, that was weird.”

“Tell me about it… Ok, we need to get back home, I want to see Papa and Dad in love and happy and not grumpy.”

“Maybe that’s what you need to think of, when you create the portal, not the place you want to go, but the situation you want to be put in”, Rafe suggested.

“Huh… It’s worth a try. Hold on.”

Max closed his eyes and tried to drown all his thoughts out, only thinking about their fathers and them being in love; thinking about a world where all that was wrong here was fixed; where Dad wasn’t engaged to some Shadowhunter lady and he and Papa were in love, like really in love.

He felt the portal opening and boy, this would be a rough ride.

“Hold on tight!”, he cried out and pulled Rafael in behind him and it was unlike any other portal Max had ever created or stepped through: they were pushed and pulled from side to side, it felt like they were caught in a washing machine, whirled around and all Max could do, was claw to his brother.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

What. Just. Happened? Only a few hours ago, Alec felt Jace dying, their parabatai rune disappeared. And now he was alive and happy, smooching Clary, who wasn’t his sister after all, Valentine was dead and his wish to the Angel never happened.

Magnus had just portalled them to the lawn in front of the institute, straight from Lake Lynn, back home. And Alec was just done. He wanted a nice dinner, a hot shower and then his bed. Nothing else. Maybe not nothing; if Magnus could join him, preferably at all three, he’d be completely content. But that wasn’t gonna happen, was it?

And then he heard the screams.

Just in front of them a portal opened, and two kids stumbled out, screaming loudly, holding tight onto each other. Wait, Alec knew these kids. It’s been a while, but he remembered the little Shadowhunter and his blue-skinned warlock brother.

“Are we dead?”, the little Warlock whispered, his eyes squeezed shut.

“You are not”, Jace stated. “You portalled in right in front of the New York Institute.”

“We did?” The two boys looked up at the grownups surrounding them. The smile on their faces, probably at the joy of being still alive, dropped almost immediately, though, replaced with something like defeat.

“Rafael and Max, right?”, Alec smiled, holding his hand out to pull the boys to their feet.

“Yeah”, the Shadowhunter nodded.

“So, you’re back.”

“We’re back”, Max smiled weakly, though he looked like he just wanted to cry.

“Come on in, then. You look, like you could use breather.”

“Are they still anti-warlock?”, Max asked, looking up at Magnus.

“Most of them are, yeah”, he nodded.

“Then I don’t want to”, the boy decided.

“Just glamour yourself”, his big brother suggested.

“Or you’ll come by my place this time.” Magnus opened a portal; Alec could see the living room on the other side. “All of you, get a move on and we can figure out, why the boys didn’t make it home.”

“What do you mean, not make it home?”, Jace threw in, “where have you been all these months since we last saw you?”

“Uh, yeah, long story”, Rafael mumbled, following Magnus through the portal, not letting go of his brother’s hand.

“Here.” As Alec stepped through the portal, he saw Magnus handing the kids a glass of coke each.

“Uhm”, the boys shot each other confused looks, “our dads don’t like it when we have coke during the week.”

“Two dads?”

The boys nodded.

Huh. Two men, adopting a Shadowhunter and a Warlock. That was possible? Alec couldn’t help looking over at Magnus. Fuck, he missed him so much! Alec really messed this one up and he just needed to get him back. Alec was ready to do anything; he loved Magnus after all! And if there could be a little Shadowhunter being brothers with a Warlock, and them raised by a gay couple, then he and Magnus could work this out.

“Are your dads here right now?”, Magnus shot back.

And the boys just turned bright red. “Yeah, you’re right”, Rafael nodded, not looking up at anyone, grabbing the glasses, mumbled a quiet ”thank you” and gave one to Max.

“So.” Magnus sat down on a couch, looking from one boy to the next. “You time travelled.”

“What?” The rest of the grown ups’ faces dropped and Jace started laughing. “You gotta be kidding me! Time travel? Are you for real?”

“Jace, might I remind you, that you talked to an Angel only half an hour ago?”, Magnus remarked and looked back at the kids. “Are you from the past or the future?”

It was silent for a while, the brothers stared on their fingers until Rafael mumbled: “Future.”

“Shit.” Alec’s mind was completely blank. So, time travel. What the fuck?

“What happened?”

“It was my fault”, Max admitted, a tear rolling off his cheek. “We were fighting, and I got so angry with him, because he thinks he always knows better because he’s a Shadowhunter and I’m just a Warlock.”

“What? No, that’s not true!”, Rafael threw in, turning to his little brother. “I know everything better than you because I’m your older brother!” He grabbed Max’s hands, squeezing them reassuringly and looked at the little warlock with all the sincerity in his eyes. “I don’t care if you’re blue, purple or green, I mean, you’re as awesome a Warlock as Papa!”

Wow, those two really reminded Alec of him and his siblings.

“Really?” The little blue eyes went big. “You think so?”

“Of course! You’re awesome, fantastic and my favourite brother.”

“I’m your only brother”, Max deadpanned. Maybe it was because they both were warlocks, but the way Max shook his head at his brother, reminded Alec a lot of Magnus.

“Boys, I’m really happy you guys are making up, but if you could continue…”, Jace urged them.

“You were so right”, Max shook his head, looking up and down Jace.

“Right?”, Rafael nodded with an eye roll.

“Right about what?”

“That you’re a bobo”, they shot over in unison.

“Excuse me?” Jace’s face dropped with insult and the other grown ups bit down their laughter.

“You heard us”, Rafael answered. “Seriously, you’re all so hopeless! I don’t even know what to… wait.” He turned to Alec and looked at him with big eyes. “You didn’t get married, did you?”

Now also Max looked up, and they weren’t just annoyed, it looked like they were actually afraid.

“I didn’t”, Alec shook his head.

“Ugh, thank the Angel!”, Max sighed as the boys felt back into their seats.

“Took your advice”, Magnus smiled over.

“What advice?”, Alec asked.

“Not to give you up”, he shrugged, but barely looked at Alec, his gaze dropped down on his hands.

Fuck. And then Alec goes ahead and gives it all up. He focused back on the boys, who were looking definitely worried about the two.

“Sorry, kids, no need for you to be involved in our drama”, Alec smiled, well, forced himself to smile. “How about you continue your story?”

“Ok… Well, like I said, I was so angry at him, and so we wouldn’t get in trouble with Dad for fighting, he said we were training, so I thought, might as well and wanted to portal us to the training field, because, well, last time we were training in the living room we broke some of Papa’s stuff and he was not happy.”

“But instead of just going to the training field, we landed there a few years in the past…”

“And now I only got us a few months into the future and have no idea how to travel any further.”

“Not sure we need to, though, the way things are looking”, Rafael grumbled.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”, Clary asked.

“Nothing”, Max quickly threw in, “nothing you need to know. Not yet at least.”

“Wait, so you know us?”

Silently, the brothers nodded.

“How?”

The boys stayed quiet, just shaking their heads. It was probably smart, they wouldn’t want to influence or even jeopardize their future.

“Wait.” Magnus sat up straight, his eyes wider than Alec had ever seen them. “You’re from our future and did you just say that your dad is a warlock?”

“No, our Papa is a warlock”, Max clarified.

“And our Dad… he’s a Shadowhunter”, Rafael quietly added, looking up at Alec. And all the thoughts just disappeared from his head.

“Uh, are you saying what I think you’re saying?” Izzy asked, just as in shock.

“Kids, now might be the time to tell us your last name”, Clary tasked them.

They looked at each other before answering in unison: “Lightwood-Bane.”

Alec was very aware that his chin was somewhere on the ground right now. He was gonna marry Magnus? And have kids with him?

“Hi Dad”, Max waved shily. “And hi Papa.”

Ok, Alec had to sit down right now, otherwise he’d probably faint. The only two options were either next to Magnus or next to the kids. His kids. He trudged over and sat down next to the little blue warlock. “You’re my… I mean, our kids?” Alec felt a giant grin on his face. “I’m gonna be a dad?”

“You’re a pretty cool dad”, Rafael nodded with a proud grin, “even though you’re probably going to ground us, if we ever make it back to the future…”

Alec looked up, right at Magnus, who was beaming over, his eyes shining brighter than the glow from raising the Angel. They were gonna get married. They were gonna have a family! A real family!

Magnus got up and walked over, sitting next to their Shadowhunter son. “Alexander, I have the feeling, we’re gonna hit the jackpot in our future. It definitely explains, why your magic is like mine.” He looked over at Max, who flushed a little purplish.

“You taught me”, he shrugged. “And Dad, you should see Rafa with a bow and arrow!”, he added with a proud grin and now it was Rafael’s turn to blush.

“You know, I can’t wait to see you with that one day”, Alec smiled. Wow, his heart was so full of love right now. He still didn’t know these boys any better, but Alec already knew there was nothing he wouldn’t do for his kids.

“I’m gonna be Aunt Izzy!”

Only now, Alec remembered that the four of them weren’t sitting by themselves and saw Clary, Jace and Izzy sitting on the opposite couch, beaming and smiling from ear to ear.

“And you’ll be Uncle Jace, and you’ll be Aunt Clary, and there’ll be Aunt Catarina, Aunt Maia and Uncle Simon and…”

“So the vampire is part of our future, great”, Alec deadpanned, with a grin, though. He wasn’t a bad guy and even though he’d never openly admit it, he came to like him.

“Of course”, Max nodded, “he is married to Aunt Izzy.”

“What? You’re gonna marry the Daylighter?” Wow, Mum and Dad would have a field day with their kids marrying Downworlders…

“Nah, by then he’s a Shadowhunter”, Rafe explained.

“The Daylighter will be a Shadowhunter?”

“Alec, please a little more respect for my future husband”, Izzy snickered.

“How does that work?”

“It involves a trip to Edom, our asshole demon grandpa, it’s a long story, and now that I think about it, we probably shouldn’t tell you all this”, Rafael admitted, his face getting red.

“Actually, you can”, Magnus clarified. “Once we send you boys on your way, I’m gonna have to wipe our memories of you, not to jinx your existence or anything.”

“I have to forget we’ll have a future, a family?” Even though it was filled with so much love, Alec could feel his heart breaking right now, as he locked eyes with Magnus, who shot him a small smile in return.

“I does look like we do find our way back to each other, I strongly believe in that.”

“You better, otherwise we’ll be right back to kick your asses”, Rafael made clear.

“Good. I wouldn’t want to miss out on any of this”, Alec smiled, gently patting the boys’ shoulders.

“So, Izzy, Alec and Magnus the only happily married ones?”, Jace asked, a little sheepishly.

“No”, Max nodded, “Uhm, are Uncle Luke and Aunt Jocelyn hitched yet?”

When Clary shook her head, Rafael continued. “Well, they are the next ones to get married. And yes, Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary, you also live happily ever after.”

“Aunt Clary, you’ll also get a parabatai! Uncle Simon.”

“I mean, they are almost parabatai already”, Izzy chuckled, “the rune is really the only thing missing.”

“And, important side note, Max is crushing on Madzie.”

“Am not!”

“Are too.”

“AM NOT!”

“Boys”, Magnus interrupted and they both looked up with wide eyes. Huh, he really was a dad…

“It sounds like our future is pretty great”, Alec smiled.

“We can’t complain. Which is why we’d like to get back there. Even though you’re probably gonna ground us”, Rafael admitted.

“That’s something for our future-selves to decide. But yes, I can help you get home”, Magnus nodded. “I assume the reason you landed here so many years ago was that you didn’t just think of the training field, but were mostly angry about a Shadowhunter, who was supposed to love a Warlock, being really mean. Sound familiar?” He glanced up at Alec, who felt himself flushing.

“I guess…”

“How did you get to this time, right now?”

“Rafe said I should think about the situation I want to be in, you know? So, I thought of you being in love, and not engaged to some Shadowhunter lady and that brought us here. But I guess, it didn’t work because you’re still not in love!”

“Don’t worry, Max, they are very much in love, they’re just being idiots”, Izzy shot over.

“Oh, thank the Angel!”, Rafe sighed.

“Yeah…” Alec locked eyes with Magnus and well, Izzy was right, they were being idiots. Well, mostly Alec was being an idiot. Magnus’ eyes beamed and it looked like Alec could actually hope for a reunion, could hope for them to figure all of this out, be happy and actually start a family!

“Ehem.”

Well, Alec really lost himself for a moment, Jace’s harrumph brought him back into the living room where everybody stared at them, especially the kids had wide beaming grins on their faces.

“Sorry…”

“Don’t be”, Rafe smiled, “I’m really happy that you’re being gross.”

“Anyways”, Magnus cleared his throat, “let’s get you two back home, your real home I mean.”

“Yes, please! Do I need to get angry again?”

“No”, Magnus shook his head, “I’ll help you powering up the portal. Might need some Shadowhunter strength, though.” He smiled up at Alec and his heart didn’t just skip one beat.

“Sure”, he nodded, feeling himself getting all flustered.

“Perfect”, he grinned. “Max, this is not going to be easy. I need you to imagine the apartment, the situation you were in before you left. Imagine exactly what your Dad looks like, what I look like, our future appearances, I mean. Think of how much we love you two, and how you feel about us.”

“We love you, too”, Max smiled and shit, Alec just wanted to cry.

“That’s really wonderful to hear”, Magnus beamed, Alec noticed his eyes getting wet as well.

“When you’re ready, start imagining all those things and open the portal. Then I’ll pour all my magic in it so it can send you far enough, alright?”

“Ok”, Max nodded.

“Well, I guess we’ll see you soon”, Rafael grinned at the aunties and uncle, who waved back.

“I can’t wait to finally, properly meet you”, Izzy smiled.

“Yeah, me neither”, Alec agreed. And before he knew it, the little Warlock had wrapped himself around Alec.

“You two, get in here”, he smiled at the rest of their family and Rafael and Magnus joined in their group hug.

“Boys, you’ll see us in no time at all. I guess, we have to wait a little while longer, but man, it really will be worth it, hey?”

“Totally”, Rafael agreed.

“Alright, you two, you should get going.” Alec pulled back but put a kiss on either’s head. He’s never done this for anyone who wasn’t his sibling ever before, but it felt right.

“Dad is right”, Magnus nodded, wiping a tear from his eyes and Alec felt all the butterflies at being addressed as Dad! “Alright then blueberry, you got this.”

“Yeah, I do!” He closed his eyes and Rafael held tight. Moments later, he opened a portal and Magnus held out his hand, shooting all his magic into it. Alec quickly offered his hand, his strength and with a smile, Magnus grabbed it. Alec could feel their combined power juicing up the portal and from one moment to the next, their boys were gone.

As the portal closed, everybody just fell back and they sat in silence for a while, Alec wasn’t sure how long. He was gonna have a family! He and Magnus would have a family together! This was incredible, Alec never thought he could have this.

“Ok, I need to erase our memories right now or I’ll start bawling my eyes out.” Magnus cleared his throat as he stood back up and before he knew it, his blue magic whirled through the room, pulling on all their memories.

“Don’t worry, Alexander”, he called over the whooshing of his magic, “we’ll find our way back together!”

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Magnus needed quiet and calm. He was currently busy mixing up a potion for a customer, a pain concoction for a Vamp with dental issues, which was a delicate procedure.

Unfortunately, when you had two kids, quiet and calm was not an option. And if one of those kids had magical abilities that he liked to use during a fight, it was downright impossible. They often practiced to control Max’s powers, but at ten years old, there was still a lot to learn.

And currently, the magic surging through the apartment was off the charts, the air was positively buzzing with it. Oh, that could not end well. A loud bang echoed through the loft, momentarily steeping everything in purple. That was not good. Magnus put all his utensils down and made for the living room.

Alec was already there, looking around the mess that up until a few moments ago had been their living room; but no sign of the boys.

“What happened?”

“I have no idea”, Alec answered, “they were arguing about some book and bam. Gone.”

“Alright…” Part of controlling Max’s abilities included practicing not to accidentally open portals when angry. They could be halfway across the city by now… Before he could ask for it, Alec already handed him an actionfigure of theirs to track. “Thanks.”

As often as this happened, it still didn’t make Magnus feel any easier about that. So far they had been lucky, but an uncontrolled portal could be seriously dangerous and every time Magnus had to track them after a fight, he was worried to no end where and in what state he would find them.

But no amount of anxiety could have prepared Magnus for this: they were gone. Completely gone. “No, no, no”, he stammered. He felt all the colour draining from his face and turned to Alec, who stared back with big eyes.

“What’s going on? Where are they?”

“I don’t know.” It was barely a whisper, and Magnus tried again, tried searching for his boys, but they weren’t there; nowhere to be found.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Alec’s voice rose with panic and he grabbed Magnus by the shoulders. “Where are they?”

“I don’t know!”, Magnus shot back, “I have no fucking clue! I… I can’t see them anywhere.”

“What does that mean?” Alexander knew exactly what it meant, he just wouldn’t want to accept it until Magnus would put it into words.

“They are not on this earth.”

After hundreds of years, Magnus thought he knew what pain and fear felt like. But this managed to annihilate the last records into nothing; it felt like all his innards were pureed.

“Ok, then we have to do something. Anything.” Alec went into overdrive, determined to save their boys. Once, Magnus fell in love with his willpower, that grit, now it only made him sad. There was nothing they could do. How was Magnus supposed to track somebody who had disappeared from the known realm? They could have ended up in Edom, or worse, stuck in Limbo. Or they were…

Magnus slumped against Alec. No, no, his angels couldn’t be… Alec wrapped an arm around Magnus. “They are alright. They always find their way back home.” He kept on repeating this little mantra, but with every repetition his voice went more desperate and the confidence died away. Magnus couldn’t fight the tears anymore, he just bit down on his tongue to keep from bawling out loud; feeling how Alec’s chest shook and heaved with suppressed sobs didn’t help.

And then, a purple flame flickered just besides them.

“MAX!”, Alec cried out, “WE’RE HERE!”

“COME ON, BLUEBERRY, YOU GOT THIS!”, Magnus yelled along.

“Can’t you help him with the portal?”

“If I send magic this way, they’ll be pushed back to where they came from”, Magnus explained. “He’s got to do this on his own.”

Magnus had to believe that Max would do it, find them again. And he did. In one big bang, the portal spewed out Max and Rafael, holding onto each other for dear life.

“Oh boys, thank the Angel!” The fathers quickly dropped down in front of the boys. “Are you alright?”

“Dad? Papa?”

“Yeah, it’s us, honey”, Magnus smiled.

They glinted through half open eyes.

“Hey”, Alec smiled at them and immediately the boys jumped up, tackle hugging them.

“It’s ok, it’s alright”, Magnus reassured them, sandwiched between their dads. “You’re safe, back home.”

And cue the waterworks. Both broke out in tears, Max sobbing against Magnus’ shoulder, Rafe against Alec’s and it almost broke Magnus’ heart.

“We got you”, he whispered, gently rubbing Max’s back. “We always got you.”

“I know”, the little warlock sniffled, “even when you don’t know us.”

Alec and Magnus shot each other a confused look. “When we don’t know you?”, Alec repeated.

“Well…” The boys leaned back a bit. “We found out that you can time travel with a portal…”

“Oh my god.” Magnus’ stomach just dropped to some very uncomfortable places.

“Yeah, it’s not like we planned it… When I portalled us, I was a little extra emotional and that kicked us back about fifteen or so years”, Max estimated.

“It was really weird. We went to the Institute, but you were all so young and you didn’t know us, and everybody was so damn unfriendly to Max, just ‘cause he’s a Warlock and then you’re engaged to a Shadowhunter lady?” Both boys looked up at their Dad, shaking their heads just like Magnus always did when Alec screwed up.

“Yeah, what’s the deal with that?”

“A big mistake I thankfully didn’t go through with”, Alec shrugged meekly.

“Yeah, you’re welcome by the way.” Proudly, Rafael puffed his chest out.

“What did you do?”

“Told Papa not to give you up. And he listened to us”, Max grinned.

“I just know when I’m talking to a genius”, Magnus winked, and Max’s cheeks flushed slightly purple.

“But seriously, the Institute was a mess! I mean, you were bad enough.”

“Not as bad as Uncle Jace, though.”

“Yeah, he was a real… bad word that I won’t say right now, because we’re probably already grounded enough”, Rafael snickered nervously.

“And then we tried to get back, but we only managed to travel a few months into the future and you two weren’t together, again”, Max groaned. “Seriously, you are like that daily soap that Papa likes so much.”

“You mean the one Papa likes in secret”, Magnus finished the sentence, blushing a little.

“Only that it’s not a secret”, Alec shrugged, grinning at his husband.

“Fair enough. But yeah, your Dad and me can be a little dramatic.”

“Understatement”, Rafe rolled his eyes. “After we told you who we really are, things got really emotional and then you, I mean the past you, helped give the portal enough power so we’d make it all the way back here.”

“Oh wow.” Alec was very lost for words.

“That sounds like we had two little guardian angels all along”, Magnus smiled, kissing each of the boys on the cheek. “Wow, we are so lucky.”

“Papa is right”, Alec beamed, “who needs Raziel when we got you two?”

#shadowhunters #max lightwood-bane #rafael lightwood-bane #izzy lightwood #alec lightwood #jace wayland #magnus bane #clary fray #alec lightwood-bane #magnus lightwood-bane #timetravel

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