#starting a new coloring series idk who to color next so drop a name from the jjk verse and i shall try

[arahabakix]

"would you lose?"

"NAH, I'D WIN."

jjk colorings:

gojou satoru from tokyo jujutsu high

[ghulehthezombiequeen]

little sunshine. - i wanna dance with somebody (who loves me)

cardinal copia x sister of sin! reader part 6.

masterlist. / little sunshine masterlist.

taglist: @gothicwonderlust, @jaymechaos, @siouxbauhaus, @millerthats

a/n: dude... idk why this took me so long to write but i really really hope you enjoy it! this is the longest chapter i've ever written (i think) as well! also we're not gonna talk about the theme being winter when valentine's day is literally next week,,,,,, i swear i started this in january ok

warnings/things to note: female reader, pet names, autistic Copia (perhaps), established relationship, this is basically the 'prom' episode of the series ykwim

enjoy <3

word count: 3,012 words.

The weeks preparing had flown by, the decorations slowly but surely popping up around the halls of the Ministry. You were walking to pick up your dress from the dry cleaner’s. It wasn’t new (you’d found it hanging in your closet left by the previous Sister who’d moved away), but it fit you perfectly, as if the previous owner had left it for you on purpose. The dress itself was drop-dead gorgeous— a wine red with some black lace trim on the Halter-strap bodice, and the Grucifix logo embroidered on the left side of the hip, the skirt flowing downwards in a trumpet style. 

As you carried it to your room, your friend Sister Lucie was walking along with you, chatting about some sort of ghoul drama. 

“Allegedly he tried to bury them in the garden, but one of them escaped the hole and lit half of the plants on fire!” She tittered, holding her royal blue dress delicately. 

You couldn’t help but giggle as well. “That seems so silly. Do you know whose ghoul that was?” “Oh, uh… I think it was your boyfriend’s.” 

That made you stop in your tracks, your heart dropping to your stomach. “Boyfriend? What are you talking about?”  Lucie stopped as well. “Well, yeah… you and that Cardinal dude, the one with the rats? You guys fucked, didn’t you?” 

You coughed, your face heating up. “Just because I spent the night in his room doesn’t mean we fucked!”  Her cheeks flushed in embarrassment. “Oh… sorry. But you guys are an item though, right? Sister Audrey caught y’all making out in the kitchen a few weeks ago.” 

You rolled your eyes in annoyance, “It’s fine. And yes, we did. But we’re not… official yet, I don’t think. I mean, I’d like to be, but he’s, y’know, pretty shy about all this, so..”  She nodded in understanding. “I get it. But really?? Copia, of all the Cardinals?? I don’t mean to be rude, but girl— you can do better than him!”  You shook your head and smiled. “I know, but I really like him!” 

Finally, you reach your room, where Sister Leah was already starting to get ready, her hair in silk curlers which she’d left in overnight. “Who’s your date, hm?” You teased as you hung up your dress, sitting on your side at the shared vanity space.  

“I’m going by myself, you know me. I like being single, thank you very much.” Leah replied, rolling her eyes as she slid into her dress— a black-and-gold fitted dress, with off the shoulder sleeves. 

You checked her out and smiled. “You’re gorgeous, girlie! What are you going to do with your hair though?”  She took out her curlers and lightly combed her raven-colored hair, matching perfectly with her tan skin. “No idea. Maybe just this or have Melissa braid it for me when I’m there so it won’t get in the way when I dance. Oh, I forgot to ask! You’re coming down with us, right?” 

“No, no this time.” You shook your head and smiled. “I’m going with Copia!” 

Her eyes widened in disbelief. “Seriously?! You were for real about that?! Is he, like, holding you at gunpoint or something?! Did his rats bite you and you’re contracting rabies?!”  You laughed. “No! I just… I like him a lot. He’s actually really sweet and considerate. He’s very old-fashioned, you know? Not because he’s old, but— you know what I mean, right?” 

She made a face, sitting next to you as she started to apply her makeup. “Whatever you say.” 

Around 7pm, you were ready to go. Leah and a few of your friends were making TikTok’s about their outfits and hairstyles. You wore dark red-to-black eyeshadow, fiercely sharp cat-eye black eyeliner, and of course, deep red lipstick to match your dress. You’d also put your hair half up half down, lightly curled and adorned with golden rose charms. Your friends were all gorgeous, but your beauty was unmatched.

“Ugh, all my friends are hot!!” Sister Calista whined as she looked at the photos on her phone.

You and Copia had been texting back and forth as well, sending snippets of each other’s outfits. The one that made you audibly snort was when he tried taking a mirror selfie, but he was holding Biscotti in one hand and on the verge of dropping him as Biscotti seemed more interested in chewing the phone case than posing for the photo. 

You made it your lock screen because it was just so adorable. 

Five or so minutes later, you heard a knock on the door, causing everyone’s heads to turn. You stood up in your black platform Mary Janes, making you maybe two or three inches taller than usual, and opened the door to see a nervous Copia standing in front of you with a bouquet of roses. His suit was similar to his Cardinal’s robes, probably a standard uniform for formal events, you figured. Only this time he was wearing a tie with the Grucifix logo printed on it as a design. 

Upon seeing your beauty, of course his face would immediately flush almost as red as your dress. “Eh…. You look… Wow. I-I mean—! Ugh, why is this so difficult…” he mumbled, turning his head and holding out the bouquet for you. “These- these are- they’re for you. You like roses, yes? Please say yes…” 

You were so touched by the romantic gesture, taking them delicately and cooing. “You’re so sweet, thank you! Give me one minute, I’ll put these by my bed.” 

“Oh, okay. Good. Yeah, go— go do that. Mhm.” He nodded awkwardly, giving you a lopsided smile as you closed the door briefly, showing off the flowers to your girlfriends, who also collectively ‘aww’ed. 

“I’ll see you guys there!” You called as you opened the door again, stepping out and holding your black clutch bag. “Aww, you got all dressed up for me.” You purred, smirking mischievously as he stood staring at you like a dumb fool. 

“Eh? Oh! Y-Yes, hello!” He cleared his throat and fixed his tie before offering his arm out. “I-I can take your bag? Or you can keep it, that’s- that’s fine too.” 

You handed your clutch to him with a small titter, lacing your arm into his as well. “I-I’m so glad we can do this… you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, amore mio…” he mumbled timidly. 

“And you are the most handsome, sweetheart.” You smiled and he flushed even redder, this man was pathetic. But you loved him either way.

The formal was being held in the main chapel of the Ministry, all the pews cleared off to the sides and replaced with round tables and chairs. There was an opening in the middle, presumably the dance floor. To the left, a photobooth where a group of Siblings were bombarding the poor photographer. To the right was the dessert and beverage bar, ranging in many different cuisines to fit everyone’s dieting habits. Everything was decorated with icicles and snowflakes, little ice skates placed intricately around the room and miniature light-up snow globes as centerpieces. Copia let out a low whistle as he checked out the area. “Wow… very fancy-shmancy, ain’t it?” 

You nodded with a soft chuckle. “Yeah, they really went all out this year. Wonder why?” 

He shrugged. “Did you, um… want to take a photo when it’s not busy? O-Or we don’t have to! I… I don’t know. I just wanted a nice photo of you for my wallet. N-Not in the stalker way, though! Like, eh… W-We’re together now, right? S-So– I-I mean!–”  

He buried his face in his hands again, and you pried them away gently with a soft smile playing at your lips. “You’re so silly. Never change, Copia. Never change.” 

He gulped and nodded, unable to look you in the eye as his cheeks continued to burn red. “You’re too good to me. I-I don’t deserve you… I’m so pathetic.” 

“Hey, hey.” You took the sides of his face in your hands, forcing him to meet your gaze. “Don’t talk like that. You are just as deserving of love as anyone else in this room, okay? Now, we’re here to have fun and celebrate the new year, yeah?” 

He nodded, an apologetic smile on his face, leaning to yours and lightly pecking your nose. “Thank you, amore.”

You hummed in contentment, releasing his face but not before you returned the gesture, your lipstick transferring onto his nose but neither of you noticed. As you sat at your assigned table together, chatting about some of your interests (he was heavily invested in some retro game called ‘Driving Miss Daisy,’ which you’d never heard of before), a ghoul approached you both and got you two as it was your turn for the photo booth. 

“Ahm.. good. Good-good, let’s go, yes?” he smiled crookedly, offering his arm yet again.

You walked arm in arm and stood in front of a periwinkle backdrop decorated with sparkly blue and white streamers, along with snowflake cutouts and a few blue and silver balloons. The ghoul told you both that you could take up to four photos, and pointed to the table nearby where there were cutout props and cheap boas in different colors. You took a white one and wrapped it around Copia’s neck, drawing him in closer until your bodies were flushed together. You smiled and looked at the camera, where the ghoul was ready to take the first photo. Copia on the other hand was mumbling a multitude of unintelligible words in Itanglese as the ghoul snapped the photo, the flash stinging your eyes a bit. “Aw, c’mon, baby! Smile!” you giggled and tossed the boa back to the table, now switching your pose to the classic prom pose, only your arms were around his waist, his back pressed against your chest as you hugged him closer. 

“Eh… Amore, this– this is the wrong way,” he mumbled. “I’m supposed to be holding the girl, n-not– um..” 

“But you’re the babygirl in this relationship,” you teased as you propped your chin on his shoulder, your cheeks grazing each other’s. He squeaked and whimpered a weak reply, his voice unable to be comprehensible. 

The ghoul took another photo, cooing softly at the sight of you two being so affectionate. 

You took two more photos, one of him with your lips hovering over your cheek and you copying him in the other. However, you actually kissed his cheek, and this time you did notice that your dark lipstick had left an imprint on his pale complexion. You chuckled but didn’t say anything, taking his hand and waiting for the ghoul to put the photos in a collage and print out two copies. 

Copia kept glancing around nervously, as if he was ashamed to be seen with you in fear of others thinking you took him to this event out of pity. 

You lightly squeezed his hand, causing his head to snap back at you. He gulped as he saw your warning expression, causing him to nod and take a deep breath.

The ghoul chirped to get both of your attention, holding out the photo strips for you to take. You thanked the ghoul and gave him a few appreciative scritches to his chin, causing him to trill and clap his hands in joy. 

You handed him his copy as he led you back to the table, noticing a few Siblings giving him playful smiles as he still hadn’t noticed the kiss mark you left on him. However, he turned to you as you both sat down, looking at you timidly. “Do I… have something on my face?” 

“Oh, only a little gift I left you from earlier,” you hummed and opened your clutch, handing him your compact mirror so he could see. His eyes widened as he saw the outline of your lips on his left cheek. 

“S-Sorella! Amore mio, perché non me l'hai detto prima? I-I-I look like un idiota!” he sputtered out quickly, taking his glove off and rapidly swiping at it to get it off. His face was almost as scarlet as your dress from how embarrassed he was. 

You couldn’t help but laugh, taking out a makeup remover wipe and helping him. 

“Ugh, you torture an old man,” he groaned. 

“Oh, honey, it’s not that bad.” 

“It is! Now I look even more pathetic…” 

You were about to say something sarcastic in return, but more Siblings and their dates had arrived at your table and kept grabbing your attention. However you kept your hand securely fitted with Copia’s under the table, trying your best to include him in the conversation but it seemed like the Siblings were too scared to confront him due to his rank. 

As more people filed in, Copia’s hand gripped your own hand tighter. He was anxious, he had never been good with big crowds of people that he knew. Sure, he could sing nonstop for two hours for thousands of people, but these were people he saw on a day-to-day basis. 

You held up his hand and pressed a kiss to the back, running your thumb on the side soothingly in hopes to calm him down, which evidently worked; he took in a deep breath and smiled weakly. 

“I-I’ll go get some drinks. Did you want anything, water, soda?” he offered, he was so polite. 

You opted for water, smiling and watching him as he wandered to the beverage bar. The Siblings sitting at the table with you took this opportunity to talk to you alone. 

“Girl, why?” Brother Nathan asked. 

“What do you mean ‘why?’” 

“Because he’s– eugh!” Brother Theo made a sour face, holding onto Nathan’s hand tightly. “He’s a Cardinal, much higher ranking than you! Is he your sugar daddy or something? Because honey, we can call someone to raise your paycheck at the library���” 

“Stop, ew! He’s not doing anything like that!” You scoffed. “I actually really enjoy his company. He’s just shy, if you would just give him a chance to warm up to you, and maybe even warm up to him in return, you'll know he’s very sweet and considerate!” 

“Right… and this is the guy that has like… fifteen rats?” Sibling Everest grimaced. 

“Oh, stop it, E.” Sister Nicole huffed. “Don’t say that like we don’t have a pet snake in our room.” 

“But it’s only one of Nugget! There’s multiple rats!” They defended themself. 

“Guys, maybe we should chill. I don’t think he’d appreciate us talking smack about him behind his back like this. We’re supposed to be having fun, remember?” Theo spoke up before the argument got heated. 

Everest sighed. “Whatever.” 

Copia returned not a minute later, holding five drinks in both hands. “Eh… I got you all some, uh.. Some water. Here,” he passed them along the table, now noticing some tension in the air from the previous conversation. 

“Ah… it’s about my rats, isn’t it?” he chuckled sheepishly. “They are perfectly healthy, no- no bad germs, I can assure. And they mostly stay in my room, don’t worry.” 

You chuckled as he attempted to socialize, holding his hand gently in reassurance. The rest of the Siblings nodded and tried to be more friendly, though every time they spoke to him, they gave you all skeptical looks. 

After everyone had filled their stomachs with food and drinks, Sister Imperator made a few announcements congratulating the upper ranks on a very successful turnout of new Siblings and churchgoers, along with a few achievements from the newly summoned ghouls. She made it pretty short as Papa Nihil needed some medical attention and was wheeled out of the room on oxygen, clutching his saxophone and grumbled in a rusty voice, “I can still play, Seestor! Let me play just once!” 

Soon after, I Wanna Dance With Somebody by Whitney Houston started playing, courtesy of the ghoul manning the DJ booth. Siblings just sat awkwardly, unsure if they could dance on the floor or not. You took this opportunity to grab Copia’s hands and yank him out of the chair, pulling him to the dance floor. “C’mon, baby! Let’s go make this official!” 

“A-A-Amore, I cannot dance!” he whimpered shakily as you took him to the middle of the dance floor, suddenly twirling him around and making him do the same to you, causing you to giggle. “Yes, you can dance! I’ve seen you on stage before!” “Well, y-yes, but not like this!!” he gasped as you dipped him, pecking him on the lips once more, the watchful eyes of the Siblings widening and a few gasping in shock and amusement. Not a moment later, more Siblings were slowly crawling to the dance floor, singing along and dancing with their friends or partners. 

“I-I don’t know the dance to this song, amore!” Copia mumbled, letting you take the lead as you sang the lyrics to him, laughing. “There’s not supposed to be a certain dance, hon! Just feel the music!” 

As the song continued, Copia began to feel more confident, finally twirling you around a few times and dipping you in return. “Is it like this, eh… baby?” 

“Mhm,” you smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck as he brought you upright again. You both took a breather to gaze into one another’s eyes, a faint blush on both of your faces. Copia gulped before impulsively leaning in and pressing his lips to yours, holding the kiss for several seconds. You could feel his hands starting to coil around your waist as you both ignored the collective oohing from your peers, and just as he pulled away you followed him, kissing back. This wasn’t a kiss of lust, nor of desire. This felt natural, as if you two were meant to be together, in each other’s arms. It felt like true love. 

As you finally pulled away with a chuckle, you could swear you could hear Copia singing under his breath, “I wanna dance with somebody, with somebody who loves me…”

~~~

previous chapter. | ???

[alreadyblondenow]

Vampire Play | Lee Jeno

▸ Jeno x reader ▸ Fluff, Angst, Smut, Vampire au ▸ HALLOWEEN SERIES: 127 HOUSE ▸ 2/5 for NEOHALLOWEEN writing festival hosted by @nct-writers

Summary: The division of upperclassmen vampires and the humans at school, is the only thing that’s stopping Lee Jeno from loving you entirely. Like how vampires hide in the shadows, your growing love for each other is needed to be kept hidden because Jeno’s family cannot be involved with a human such as you. The family name should stay pure and untouched.

Word count: 9k

Warnings: Discriminations between vampires and humans, blood, more blood, heavy vampire-human bullying, blood sucking, swearing, mentions of other idols, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, stalking, teenagers breaking the school rules, not a warning but Jaemin is a big character here. Mentions of coffin, period blood jokes, starving students 

A/N: Pure fiction and inspired by some movies of course. Regarding Jaemin, idk tell me if I should make his story. He was the first one to have a human girlfriend so... Inspired by Vampire Academy, Slaughterhouse Rulez. 

Taglist: I hope I didn’t miss anyone, if yes please do message me so I can apologize huhu @ovelha-colorida-v @huangxx @soondaengie @sunshinedhyuck @your-kpop-cafe @bumblebeenct @joyfuleggsfishbanana @floweringtheflowers @neosculptures​

The sound of the school bell welcomes you to your new school as your parents drop you off and watch you reach their dreams. That’s right, theirs. This isn’t what you wanted, but thinking about how your parents worked so hard for you to have a great education is enough push to force yourself to study and like this place. It was their dream for you to go to an exclusive school such as 127 House. A place where the finest kind of vampires go to school, and a place where rich humans like you are given the opportunity to have the same education.

Sounds fun? It does, but the division between humans and vampires is taken seriously in 127 House. Actually, it’s not a division, it’s discrimination. 

Yes, you go to the same school with the vampires but those bloodsuckers are treated royalty. Humans are not allowed to be friends with vampires, talking to vampires is strictly prohibited, fornicating with a vampire is a major offense, and having a relationship with a vampire can get you kicked out of the school. It says in the student handbook that they have all these rules and divisions to protect the royal bloodsuckers and to maintain peace and order inside the school. 

“You’re going to do your best, right?” your mom asks, you see the headmaster waiting for you to say goodbye to your parents. 

“I’m going to be fine, drive home safe, okay? See in you on Christmas” you hugged them and gather your things and walk towards the headmaster. The house is all white you noticed, even the door is white and you thought that the house will finally have some color once you enter the premises, but no. It’s still white and the place feels cold. White walls, white ceiling, no ray of sunshine, well that part is understandable. At least the interior is nice. 

Before the assembly officially starts, you’re blessed to have a friend to at least warn you and tell you about the dos and don’ts in this school. Yeji, your nice roommate. Being a sophomore transferee is not easy, because no one does that. Literally, you’re a fresh meat, in a house where 50% of the population is vampires. You’re the only transferee and that makes you an automatic target to the bullies. High school. 

You fixed your things and made your bed, you make sure to look presentable on your first day of school. Going to school in the evening is something new to you and you pray that you don’t sleep in one of your classes tonight. Given that it’s a vampire school, humans are required to adjust and follow the vampire time table. That means sleeping during day time and having classes in the middle of the night. 

“Stop fidgeting, or the cold bloods and other humans will make fun of you” Yeji whispers while you two come down the stairs and head to the main hall. You scan your surroundings without turning your head too much and try to observe secretly. Not much happenings, for now, the only thing you found out is that human students are all dressed in black uniforms, all looking rich and righteous. Not your normal high school classmates.  

As you enter the main hall, the vampires are not yet seated in their rightful place. Humans are all seated at the back and are not allowed to chatter loudly, and vampires are seated upfront with teachers and higher ups, they can do whatever they want. You have never seen a vampire up close, you just imagined them to look pale and lifeless, that’s all nothing special. 

“Hey,” Yeji whispered so quietly, you barely heard her. “Once the vampires are here, don’t you dare look at them, no head-turning, wait for them to be seated” you nod your head as an acknowledgment of what Yeji said. Being a transferee is making you anxious already even around your own kind, now you’re curious what can a vampire’s presence do to you?

Soon, she nudges your elbow and told you to look down because they’re finally here. In the corner of your eye, you don’t see any of their reflection on the shiny and clean floor of 127 House, but you hear footsteps and low chatters, the air became cold like their bloods while they were walking on the aisle and that alone gave you goosebumps. 

When it’s finally allowed to look upfront, curiosity is swallowing your mind. You didn’t listen to the one talking in front and you spend the entire time looking at their backs. All dressed in white with a small shade of light blue, pure like their families, even from behind they all look like gods who blessed the Earth with their presence. Each and every one of them, are very beautiful, if the men looked like gods, the ladies looked like angels without wings but with fangs. 

One vampire definitely caught your eye. Blonde hair, skin as white as snow, sharp jawline, perfect nose, and dark almond eyes. You can’t stop looking at him and you can hear your heart beats faster than usual for no reason. “Lee Jeno” Yeji whispered to you while keeping her eyes upfront. “He runs this school and everyone is afraid of him, he’s from a family that breeds the purest vampires of all time. Filthy rich, untouchable, can speak seven languages and oh, every girl in this school fantasizes about him. But not me of course, I fantasize about Hyunjin over there” you looked in the direction that she told you. 

As soon as the assembly is finished, you’re back to bowing your heads until the last vampire leaves the room. You realized that this is going to be your new life for a whole year and until you graduate from this school. One day at a time, you sigh and tell yourself.

High school is high school. But every day in 127 House is like a game of chicken with all these bloodsuckers bullying humans. Being invisible is almost impossible, they always find a way to make fun of humans. The bullying system made you change yourself. You used to be a fun person and you love talking to your friends, but now you go to class, listen to new learnings, avoid every vampire you see, go to church every Sunday, and do it again. Human or not, you try to avoid friendship.

Day by day, you spend it exactly how you spend it yesterday. It was sickening and boring, you miss your family and friends and you wonder if they miss you too. The only coping mechanism you’re allowed to do is read books in the huge old library of 127 House. Luckily, the other students aren’t interested enough in the books that this library holds. They prefer eBooks, and they all use the new library where computers and tablets are used instead of actual books. The old library was your safe place, away from the abnormalities that the world holds. You go here before you go to school, and spend your whole day here every weekend alone and unbothered. Or so you thought. 

Little did you know, there's a pair of eyes who watches you in the shadows of the tall bookshelves whenever you visit. The same pair of eyes are amused whenever you smile while reading a book. The same pair of eyes is slowly being fond of you each day passes. Of course, he wouldn’t dare bother you in your safe place, he’s not that cruel or selfish. But one fine day, he decided to show up.  

“You’re new here” 

You were just about to get out of a dusty aisle when suddenly a man dressed in white and blue cornered you. As quick as you can, you covered your face with the book that you’re holding and didn’t dare look at his perfect form and completely avoiding the cold blooded man. 

This is their way to put humans in trouble, they talk to you and pretend that they wanted to have a decent conversation, but no. One moment they’re staring in your eyes like you have the same status in life and the next thing you know, you’re in the headmaster’s office for a scolding. It’s one of their many ways of bullying humans. Vampires are all bullies, they enjoy it. 

“Hey, I’m your senior and I’m talking to you. There’s no one in here, it’s just the two of us” he reasons out, frustrated because you won’t even look at him. Still avoiding his holy presence, you walked past by the vampire as fast as you can but he followed you until you reach your seat. What’s with these cold blooded creatures? 

“If you don’t talk to me, I’ll make up a story and tell it to the headmaster. If you leave, I’ll tell him you touched me” it was a threat and you don’t like it. Even so, you stopped fixing your things and took a sit. He sat on the table across you with his books and his notebooks, you figured he has some studying to do. 

“I’m Jeno” 

“I know” your responses were quick and straightforward as possible. 

“So what are you reading?” he asks, you see him holding his pen, ready to write down notes perhaps. He doesn’t look like the cold blooded Jeno that you usually see during general assemblies or free period. Now, he looked like a person, who’s pale but still handsome and ethereal. You lift the book and showed him the cover to answer his question, you didn’t even bother to let out another word from your mouth. It’s obvious, he’s trouble. 

“What’s your name?” he asks while writing in his notebook. 

“Y/n” 

“How's your stay in 127 House so far, Y/n?” his smile was inviting, and you know that you shouldn’t stare because looking at his perfection is like committing a sin, but you couldn’t help it. You took the chance to get a better look at his face. For the first time.

“Sorry I have to go” and just like that, you gathered anything you could reach from your stuff and leave your other things on the desk. You can always come back during the daytime, where they’re all asleep. You bolted outside the library and with heavy breaths, ran back to your dorm room and did not tell anyone what happened. 

Talking to Jeno even though it was barely a conversation was like stealing a huge amount of cash from your parents. Even though he looked nice the whole time, you still can’t trust the man. With that, you can only hope and pray that the Lee Jeno did not make up stories just for his entertainment. 

The next day during the general assembly, you saw Jeno in front with his usual vampire might. Even more ethereal than yesterday. As you go on with your day, you went to class with caution. Hoping that you’re not going to be called to the headmaster’s office. And thankfully, you survived the day. What a relief, you thought! You headed back to the library to get the things that you left yesterday and to your surprise, your stuff was nicely organized. He fixed your things and left you a note. 

Sorry to have scared you. -L.J

You read his short note over and over again, smelling the scented paper that he used, it smelled like a rose, and didn’t notice him sneak beside you because you were busy putting your stuff inside the bag. 

“You’re back,” he said a little lively, and it completely startled you that he almost gave you a heart attack. Given that the library is huge and quiet, your squeak echoed and surrounded the place. And again, you avoided his gaze and tried running away for the second time but he’s quick to block you. 

“Hey, didn’t I earn your trust? Not even a bit? I don’t bully humans… they just happened to be scared of me” he explains. Still, it doesn’t make any sense to you. “Look, I’ve been watching you read a bunch of books in here for days. And this has been my favorite place ever since I stepped foot in this house, no one dared to enter this wretched library. We could share” he hands you your notebook from the desk and you accept it slowly. 

“Okay,” you said, still uncomfortable with his godly presence. 

“If we're going to be friends, you should stop doing that. It will not kill you to have a decent conversation with me. As I’ve said before, we're alone in here” 

Friends? Who told him you wanted to be friends with him? 

“Not that you actually care, but I’ve read almost 30% percent of the books here. They’re quite old but golden…” He continued talking about books like the smell of your blood doesn’t bother him at all. It does. But he would rather hold his breath than losing the chance to be friends with you. By the end of the day, you brought some books that Jeno have recommended you read. It kept you all night, turning pages until you finish one book, and the next thing you know you’ve finished reading all of them. He was right about the books. The vampire has taste. 

During your next meeting at the library, you talked about how the books that you’ve read and he was happy that you loved them. “Show me more?” it was not a request, but it was your move and the only way you could give back to the kindness that Jeno showed you. 

Books after books and after a few days, you and Jeno became comfortable with each other. Comfortable enough to laugh and make jokes as if you’ve been friends for a long time now and completely forgetting the cruel world outside the white walls of the library. It was a growing friendship. A unique friendship that you’re both aware of.

Little did you know, that the vampire has grown a huge crush on you. He has never seen someone so full of life and be happy with even the smallest of things. You’re the epitome of simplicity but also too much and too good for him.  

“Hey, are you even listening to me?” Jaemin slapped his friend with his free hand while they were busy feeding. He noticed that his friend was spaced out for some time now, smiling alone like an idiot, and there’s something different with Jeno these past few days. “Ohhh. I get it. You have a shiny new toy” Jaemin teases Jeno while taking a sip of cold blood. 

“You’re the one who toys with the humans, Jaem not me” Jeno defends, taking a sip of his cold blood too. 

“So what are we going to do this time? Make them cry, huh?” it’s easy for Jaemin to talk about things like that. Jaemin bullies mostly human girls, he’s quite irresistible with those pearly whites, perfect fangs, sexy built.

Jeno chuckled and smiled at Jaemin, “I’m going to love this one. She’s different from the other humans, she’s not selfish. She just wants to survive high school and she loves books” there was a smile on Jeno’s face while he was talking about you, something Jaemin never thought he would witness. Jeno is in love. He gulps, knowing all too well that his friend is in danger. 

“For how long?” Jaemin asks nervously, hoping that there’s still hope to pull Jeno out of this dangerous situation. 

“For three. Lovely. Weeks” he smiled, oh so lovingly to his friend again. “Don’t tell the others, please” Jeno knew that he could trust Jaemin no matter what, and for that, he’s thankful. 

 You and Jeno continued being friends, see each other in the library, spend hours and hours talking and knowing each other deeply. And as you continue with this friendship, his handsomeness is becoming harder and harder to avoid each day that passes. “I like your smile. You should smile more often” you blurted out, feeling brave to talk like that to Jeno. He smiled at you in return, his eyes became small and full of life even though the man has no soul. It’s like he has this duality that whenever he’s outside the library, he is this cold blooded creature but when you’re alone together he is this funny guy who’s clumsy and talks too much. 

Of course, you don’t know, but Jeno goes to the library not because of the books anymore. He just wants to meet you and be with you, make him forget about the world that he grew up to, make him forget that he’s a vampire. Let him admire your beauty, be drunk on the smell of your blood. For Jeno, feeling your warmth near him makes him feel that he does exist in this world. 

The truth is, he’s disgusted with the world outside this library. Sick of all the rules that this school implements especially the horrible division. Because of that division, he can’t do something for himself, just this once. But for the sake of their family name, he’s forcing himself to play it all out and pretend that it doesn’t sicken him. 

One cold night during free period, you saw him and his friends walking towards you and Yeji in the middle of the hallway. You don’t know what came into your head but you didn’t avoid the presence of the men in white and with all your confidence, you said “Hi Jeno” 

It broke your heart how he didn’t even spare you a glance, you saw it in your own eyes how his face shows no emotion when he heard you call his name. His friends heard your bravery and of course, they made fun of you, laughed at you for failing to have Jeno’s attention. What came into your head? Did you forget the division because you have a secret friendship with him? That horrible experience slapped you with the ugly truth again. Vampires don’t mingle with humans. You decided not to come to the library ever again, live peacefully behind their shadows, and enjoy the world class education that this school provides. As you should. Keeping yourself invisible became easier as you made new human friends that you could actually mingle with. It was nice having new friends from your kind, it makes you forget about the friendship that you had with Jeno too. But there's no other friend like him. 

“Hi there. I’m Jaemin” the vampire cornered you with all his glory, standing in front of you as you keep your head down and ignore the cold blood who’s bullying you. “I know your secret with Jeno” he whispers to you with a tone that really got into your nerves, it made you look at him, and got in trouble for letting your guard down because of what Jaemin did and faced a week in detention and a week without dinner. 

School’s twisted rules to teach humans respect. It’s not the hunger that made you incredibly mad with Jeno, and it’s not Jaemin either, it’s the fact that he told his friend about you when you didn’t even tell a single soul about what you knew about him.

“Stay away from me and stop bullying me. I'm not scared of you or the rules, I don’t care if I leave this place!” your voice echoes and surrounds the room and for the first time in your life you saw Lee Jeno feel so small. “But I do care about what my parents want, so get out of my life Jeno” your attempt to make a dramatic exit was once again stopped, he brought you deep into one of the dusty aisle and cough a little as you try to get away from his grasp. 

 Jeno was awfully close to you, putting both of his hands on the bookshelf behind you, caging you with his presence. He can hear your heartbeat so fast your blood became even more inviting. “Don’t be scared. I’m not going to bite you” he explains but it doesn’t change anything, you still want to get out of here. You watch him turn silent, and wait for his next move. His right hand caressed your head, feeling your hair and watching his own fingers touch your features and feel your warm skin. It was amusing for him, this is his first time touching a human and not just any human. The human that he likes. 

In one swift move, he kissed you on the lips. And It was not a kiss that lovers share. It was a kiss like someone is confessing their love. Jeno can’t find the words on how he can be more honest with you when he just ruined your trust. And you do understand what he’s saying, he just confessed his feelings using that kiss because he knew you won’t listen to him anymore.

“I hope you understand” his face stayed close to you, nuzzling your hair and enjoying your warmth. He reached for your hand and slowly intertwined his fingers with yours. It was like fire and ice were merging at this very moment. And if you thought holding his hands made your heart beat faster like you just ran a mile, the moment he made you encircle your arms around his waist made you weak right then and there and he was quick to catch you. You too have no words for what's happening right now but you feel the same way towards Jeno. 

He kissed you again and this time you returned the kiss, making the vampire smile from ear to ear in between the kiss, exposing his sharp fangs to you for the first time which you thought he was going to bite you, but no, he kissed you deeper this time. And during the kiss, you can feel his fangs scratch slightly with your teeth. You can also say that he just fed because the metal taste of human blood still lingers in his lips and tongue, but you don’t care. It’s Jeno. 

The peck that Jeno planned on giving you, became your first make out session with him in the old and dusty library. Whenever someone pulls away and tried to stop kissing, you come right back in and devour each other’s lips again. “I’m sorry for what I did to you. But seriously what were you thinking?” he said, cupping your face as he waits for your answer. 

“I know it’s my fault. But I thought what we have here is something special-“ 

“It is special. And it’s for me and you, only. Please don’t do it again, for us” he rests his forehead on yours, closing his eyes and feeling the happiness sink right in. “To be honest I was heartbroken when you stopped coming here. I thought I lost you already way before you can be mine” he kissed you again, but this time he’s hugging you tightly. “Fuck you smell good, you’re making me hungry” you watch him gulp closely, “I need to uhm- you know, I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

And there’s that smile you love seeing, only for your eyes to see. “Yes” you smiled back and kissed him one last time.  

Just like your moments with Jeno in the library, you two continue to meet secretly and spend time together. The books became witness to your growing love as this dangerous relationship becomes, even more, deeper each day passes. It was a secret relationship, but your feelings were true as it can be.

Dating like normal teenagers was hard, of course given the situation you two can’t go on dates. But the vampire is clever and smart. You forgot how he has this whole school wrapped around his finger. With the help of the other vampires to cover up for him, he made a picnic date happen… in the middle of the woods, under the dark.

“Vampires wear denim pants?” you tease him and he greets you with a kiss. 

It was a starry night and you watch and connect the stars while holding each other’s hand. His cold skin doesn’t bother you anymore, you grew fond of it. You spend the night giggling quietly with Jeno, making each other laugh, telling unbelievable stories to each other from your kind. 

“Have you ever experienced biting a human?” you asked curiously, still looking at the stars and holding Jeno’s cold hands. 

“That’s illegal. My family is pure, the finest as they say” he scoffed as if the thought of his family disgust him. “Poor vampires suck blood from humans because they can’t afford buying clean and purified ones- think of it as water, most rich vampires think drinking directly from humans is… disgusting and dirty. So they buy the filtered ones” you nod your head, acknowledging what he said understanding how it works, thinking deeply like you're solving a Math problem. He was amused by your reaction. 

“What will happen to you if they find out about us?” you blurted out, resting your chin on his strong chest as you wait for his answer. 

“To be honest I don’t know. But were sure in trouble young lady” he nuzzles your hair but it’s not your shampoo that he smelled, it’s your blood. He tickled your sides again so he can hear your laugh that’s music to his ears. 

“Okay okay, last question,” you said, catching your breath from too much laughing. 

“Shoot” 

“How can someone be a vampire?” 

“Nope. Not answering that. Too dangerous for you young lady” he teased and tickled you again. It’s not fair, you thought. 

When Jeno finally got tired of teasing you, he turned silent and stared at your face as if he’s engraving it in his memory. Deep inside, he doesn’t know how to keep you away from his family. He doesn’t know how you can survive the cruelty of his world.  

“I love you” you heard him whisper, you barely heard it but he was sincere. He's kissing your knuckles and holding it tightly, pulling you closer to his cold body for a kiss on the lips, “I love you too” you said kissing his cold hand while looking at him smiling from ear to ear again, exposing his fangs to you. 

To make Jaemin pay for what he’s done to you, Jeno made him the lookout whenever you and the vampire have time to make out in locker rooms during free periods. Jeno would drag you there and make out with you until he’s satisfied or he’s late for his next class. You always feel nervous whenever you’re with Jeno but his lips, oh his lips! Does it make you calm and forget about the world. 

If the locker room is not safe, you always have the woods at night and no one would dare lurk in those dark places. Jeno kept you safe in the dark and made you feel safe, knowing that it makes you scared. “I’m a vampire, what are you so afraid of?” he chuckled, and just like that, you two continue to kiss like there's nothing wrong in what you’re doing. 

During weekends, you and Jeno love to stargaze. Hugging you under a blanket, arms perfectly wrapped around you. His cold skin brings you comfort even if sometimes it makes you shiver. You taught him how to eat cookies, which he finds disgusting but he eats it anyway to not disappoint you. 

And just like normal teenage relationships, what’s a great relationship without having your first big a fight? In fact, it was so big and horrible that you thought that was the end of it. Nothing beats jealousy. 

“We were lab partners, Jeno! And we were studying!” by this time you were yelling at him and you hate this feeling. Both of you are completely aware of the love you share, but being divided this way can make you both jealous in every way. “How about you with Yeeun, huh? Do you enjoy her godly presence?” you added.

“Don’t get me started about you and Mark. I see you two, too close sometimes. Are you cheating on me?” it was so easy for him to accuse you of something you would never do to the man you love. With that, you scoffed and turned your back on him, gathering your books and making your way out of the library. He didn’t even bother stopping you this time like he always does. 

The fight went on for weeks until exams week were finally over. It was torture for both of you but he hurt you in a way you couldn’t believe he can. You went to the library to return some books you’ve already finished reading. To your surprise a red rose is waiting for you on the desk you claim as yours, of course, it’s from Jeno. 

Jealousy can’t ruin us. Please forgive me - L.J

You meet him in the woods that night after class, exchanged apologies, sweet and loving words, and shared a wonderful kiss. He’s right, jealousy can’t ruin what you have. Every relationship experiences huge fights.

Walking hand in hand back to the school premises, Jeno smelled another human blood near the two of you. He was just about to tell you to hide when Jaemin and his girlfriend were walking hand in hand towards the dark where you just came from. She was your senior, and you can see that she holds on to Jaemin so tight like you’re about to take Jaemin away from her. She was scared that you’d tell, but you’re not like that, you smiled and gave her your jacket. “It’s awfully cold back there. It’s nice to know I’m not alone” she smiled back at you. 

“Glad you two are back” Jaemin teases Jeno and your boyfriend just rolled his eyes at him. 

One hot afternoon in the library, Jeno’s skin was so irritated with the heat but he wanted to be with you. He was confident with his hands that it started to roam around your body, something he’s never done before but you like it. Let’s not fool ourselves here. 

“Does the heat makes you horny? Or the heat is a different story?” you tease him in between kisses. His hand is under your skirt, caressing your ass cheek playing with the hem of your black lacy panties. If him being confident with his hands shocks you, well you were completely surprised when he removed your panties swiftly and started to undo his belt. 

“Baby, I’m a virgin. Don’t I at least deserved to fucked on your coffin?” You were talking about his bed, and it was a joke that made laugh and brought up your panties again. “Thank you” you knew he would understand that you don’t want to have your first sex in a dusty library and you’re thankful that Jeno is a gentleman even though he can't control himself sometimes.

He’s one horny vampire.

“When?” he was talking about the sex you were sure of it. And the real answer to that is you don’t know because you don’t know how. 

“I’m not sure how to make that happen, baby, I’m not the god of this school” you both chuckled and laughed quietly. 

“Right- I’m sorry about your panties-“ 

“No no, it’s okay“ you kissed his cheek and fixed his ruined hair.  

“Wait for me here tonight, then I’ll bring you to our dorms” it was another shocker for you, how can he make that possible? He kissed your hand and wore his black sunglasses again before he leaves the library. Leaving you with a promise that tonight is going to be special.

Usually, on weekends, you and Jeno go stargazing deep into the woods and make out like crazy under the stars but tonight, he brought you to his dorm room and you both never felt so together. The vampire dorm is deep underground to protect them from the heat and harsh sunlight. Maybe that’s why it takes them too long during general assemblies. And as expected, Jeno’s room is dark, with no windows and minimal airflow but you can manage. There’s no coffin, but his bed is cold even though you two are wildly kissing already while you sit comfortably on top of him, shirtless and only wearing thin sweatpants while you are wearing only your matching underwear. 

“We have to be absolutely quiet tonight” he whispers softly to you. In return, you whisper back a soft ‘okay’ while still grinding on top of Jeno’s hardening cock. You do your best to keep quiet, not only you don’t want to get caught, but there are literally a hundred vampires outside Jeno’s room and you wouldn’t want the attention.  

“You smell good” it sounded like a quiet moan like he’s stopping himself but still he swims on the lust and frenzy that your blood brings. 

“I smell good or my blood smells good?” you tease him more, leaning on his figure, grinding even more deliciously. It was torture for him, but he likes it. He smiled at you, but not like the kind of smile you loved seeing. It was a weak smile, watching you under his lids, shaking his head in disbelief. He grabs the small of your back, pulling you closer than ever to him. It was cold, but not because of the night. You were sure that it’s cold because of Jeno’s skin pressing on your body. 

With one swift move, he’s on top of you, kissing your neck that he oh so love, gripping your clothed boobs so hard you thought your bra will get ruined. Using one hand, you unclasp your bra expose yourself to Jeno. It made him stop devouring your neck and the grip on your boobs loosen up. He can’t believe that this is all happening. 

“I always thought you look even more beautiful, naked” he swirls his pointer finger on your hardening nipples, watching you with full amusement on how you will react with his touch. 

“I didn’t know you were capable of thinking such dirty thought” you managed to bite back, still feeling his cold fingers swirl slowly around your nipples. He kissed you on the chest, softly like your first kiss together. But the softness was quickly replaced with lustful one as you watch him suck your boobs while looking deep into your eyes. Your nipples were quick to be swollen because of the way how Jeno sucks them. Well, he’s a vampire after all. 

You notice his kisses were slowly going down to your stomach as he takes time kissing your inner thighs. Spreading your legs according to his liking before he removes your panties. It’s weird how he was facing your clothed pussy, feeling his cold breath brush on your damped panties as he was smelling it. “Your period is near, I can smell it” it was a joke but it made you shy as hell in front of your boyfriend that you closed your legs and grab the blanket near you. 

Jeno was chuckling awkwardly. It was funny but you still can’t help but be shy. Your boyfriend was quick to apologize, kissing you again on the lips and putting away the blanket that you covered yourself with. He can be an effective period tracker you joke to yourself. 

He removed your panties swiftly and get himself naked before he returns to his place in between your legs. He looked more handsome flashing those perfect abs, again, only for your eyes. You run your hands around his perfect body, making him twitch a little because of your warm palms. He proceeds to suck his own fingers, point and middle finger, before he puts it on your slit. Making it wet even more. If he thought that your palms were warm, your walls were warmer and he likes the feeling of it just like how you love the feeling of his cold skin. 

Given that you’re a virgin, your hole was so tight that it scared Jeno to continue. “Does it hurt?” he asks, moving his two fingers in and out of your wet entrance. The hurt was obvious in your face it surely bothered your boyfriend, being a virgin vampire is definitely making him nervous right now. 

“Yeah. But it feels good baby, don’t stop” it was a quiet and airy moan. Your head rolled back, exposing your neck in front of him. He avoided it for the first time because it was becoming too much to handle. That’s not good he thought, he never felt that way before towards you. 

He removed his fingers and cleaned it with his own mouth. Making you watch how he lick those fingers of his, coated with your pussy juices, he looked fucking hot and you wonder if it tastes good for him. Little did you know he is becoming crazy, your pussy juices were the closest thing he can get to have a taste of you. 

“You do know that there's more down there right?” you were inviting him to lick your pussy, he only smirked and went close to you. Kissing your mouth hungrily like he hasn’t kissed you for months. 

“Yes but that’s dangerous, I can end up sucking your period blood-“

“Which is gross!” you whispered a little too loud, making Jeno laugh uncontrollably. 

“Ohhh. I love you, ready?” he asked, palming himself and pumping his cock before he proceeds. You nod your head ‘yes’, feeling your heart beat faster. You’re about to lose your virginity to a guy you love. You smiled and sling your arms around his neck, he can hear your heartbeat but your face is telling him that you’re happy and excited. 

He never left your lips, kissing you none stop so you won’t think about the hurt. It was sweet. But he was big and you were the one who stopped returning the kisses. It felt like your air was being sucked up, you started breathing heavily and to Jeno… No one said that the lust that your blood brings during sex was unbearable. 

For your safety, he was trying not to breathe and avoid your delicious scent. Your blood smells like freshly cooked ham on Christmas Eve. It lingers around the room. 

You notice that his thrusts were stiff and he looked in pain more than you. You tried reaching for his face but he avoided your touch and continued sliding his cock in and out of you. The hurt was long forgotten because you were more bothered with how Jeno is reacting to the sex. 

It’s your blood. He’s stopping himself. 

“Hey, hey, look at me baby,” it was hard for you too, because even though Jeno’s thrust was sloppy, it still felt good for you. “Bite me, it’s okay” you know that you shouldn’t have offered, but what can you do? He was suffering. 

It was an offer that he can’t refuse. A sin that he doesn’t care doing. He tried to relax himself and smelled your blood even more, enjoying the high and making himself more drunk . He leaned closer to your neck, licking it over and over again. He finds a perfect spot where he can suck you off, a perfect spot where you can hide the traces of his fangs. 

And just when you feel like you’re already on the edge, you stop yourself from moaning too much and take Jeno’s quick thrust. His cold hand grips one boob and the other is intertwined with your hand. He can hear your hearbeat racing, he knows you’re about to have an orgasm. 

“Jen I’m gonna cum-“ your warning has been cut off when you feel something stick into your skin that you almost screamed but you're quick to stop yourself. 

Getting your blood sucked felt amazing, it’s like having a slow orgasm that will make you moan, smile through the high with furrowed brows, then it will make you feel dizzy for a second. And the most amazing part about that, it works both ways. 

Jeno shoots his cum on his clean sheets, even though he can’t get you pregnant, he can’t cum inside you without your consent. He flopped beside you while you’re still high from your orgasm and getting your blood sucked. Jeno seized this moment to kiss oh so sweetly to bring you back to Earth with him. 

When you don’t feel numb already, you saw Jeno’s lips with a little bit of blood on the side. You wiped it with your thumb with a smile and he catches your hand with his lips and kissed it. It was an amazing first time for both of you, no doubt about that.  

“You okay, Jeno?” you asked him because you’re not sure what your blood does to him. 

“More than okay. How about you, did I hurt you?” he was more concerned and checked the part where he had bit you, kissed it softly until it’s tickling you and you had to make him stop. 

“I just remembered how you said that-uhm, drinking human blood straight from a human is kind of dirty-“ he stopped you with a kiss and pulled you close to him. 

“What are you talking about, it’s your blood. Nothing about you can disgust me” he whispers to you. 

The sex and the bloodsucking made your relationship even more special and thrilling. Every weekend, Jeno sneaks you into his room and be intimate with you in every way possible. Round after round and before you reach your orgasm, Jeno bites you in the same place and suck you off. The taste of your blood has become his new favorite thing in the world that even one drop of it on his tongue, he will know that it’s yours. It was like a drug for both of you and an addiction that has to be stopped. 

Sometimes when he feels full or you look too weak, there’s no bloodsucking. Only sex, and pure sex. Even though it’s better when there’s blood involved, Jeno can still make you feel good using his cock and you can still make him dizzy by sucking him off. If he’s being completely honest with you, it amazes him with how good you suck him off. Your mouth makes him crazy, moan your name and ask for more. Just like now that his whole length is inside your mouth and the tip of his cock is hitting the back of your throat. Thrusting his length in and out, making you gag but you can handle it. 

Again, you amaze him. “You could be a great vampire, you know how to suck good.” He kissed you on the lips and made you lay beside him, switching positions to return the favor. 

He was still hard and his cock is ready to go, pushing in slowly as usual in your tight walls. Another addicting thing about you. After having sex almost every week, Jeno became confident in bed, even more confident than before. Now, he can fuck you hard and give you a mind blowing orgasm without biting you. 

“Jeno, harder” you moan quietly, careful not to be heard. Jeno pounds in you hard, making your boobs bounce up and down. He recently found out that you love it when he touches your clit while you’re on edge and on the verge to have a great orgasm. And one of the many perks of being a vampire is, he can hear your heart beats fast so he knows when to put his thumb and touch you. Softly at first, like he’s not fucking you hard, then he will slowly put pressure on his fingers and the next thing he knows, you’re shivering beneath him, parting your lips, and reaching for Jeno’s shoulder to bite it as you ease your oversensitivity and to stop yourself from moaning loudly. 

“Who’s the vampire here? me or you?” he chuckles and kisses you on the lips watching you smile weakly beneath him. You feel him wear his shirt and boxers brief as he waits for you to calm down. 

“Can you make me a vampire someday?” it was a stupid question. He just chuckled, cleaned you up, and helped you get dressed. 

“No. Absolutely not” he answered and kissed you again. 

As you were about to tie your shoes, you saw your hand shaking uncontrollably. You were about to hide it from Jeno but he saw it already and he was quick to hold your hand even if he knows he holds no warmth and his cold hands can make your hands shake more. But he’s confident that he can make you calm.  

“I’m here. Relax, tell me the truth, are you okay?” he kisses your knuckles and proceeds to tie your shoes himself as he waits for your answer. 

“I’m fine. This is the first time though” it’s true. 

“Okay, well, baby you have to take care of yourself out there because I can’t. And I’m sorry, I truly am. Let’s be careful from now on okay? No more bloodsucking I promise” 

As much as he wants to take care of you outside, he can’t but he has his own ways. Whenever he’s around you, he simply watches you. It frustrates him even more but he has to remain calm or else people will get suspicious. Jeno became more and more in love with you, as he continues to fear losing you. 

This is his first time feeling such fear. 

One fine Sunday night where the whole school was at church and the mass just finished, you started to feel dizzy and unstable. Unlike morning general assemblies where the vampires get out first, during church it’s different. They are expected to pray more and stay a little bit longer in church and humans leave first.

While you wait for your row to stand up and head out, you shake your head from side to side to try and shrug it off. You try closing your eyes and open them again to stop the dizziness but it won't leave. You felt weak as you try to stand up and walk with the others, but your eyesight was turning black. 

Then you fainted. Feeling the cold floor of 127 House on your face. 

The girls gasped and made quite a noise at church while the vampires were already starting to pray again. And usually, Jeno wouldn’t care what’s happening behind. But Jaemin does. 

“She fainted” Jaemin murmured and pretends to pray. 

“Who yours?” Jeno murmured back. 

“No. Yours” 

And just like that Jeno didn’t hesitate to turn his head back and see for himself. It’s true. He saw you being carried by the school nurse and the sight of it makes him want to vomit all the blood that he had for dinner earlier during feeding. He was worried sick about you but he can't do shit. 

“Control yourself. She will be fine” Jaemin was worrying for his friend too. For all, he knows you are Jeno’s weakness and he’s scared that Jeno will cause a scene at church in front of the other vampires and expose his vulnerability. 

As you stayed unconscious at the school’s hospital wing, the school nurse checked your pulse, your breathing, and your blood, and found of about Jeno’s markings at the top of your collar bone. You lost a lot of blood from too much intimacy with Jeno, and the higher ups of the school only had one theory of what happened to you. You were fornicating with a vampire which is a sin to them. 

Of course, they only cared about Jeno’s wellbeing and quickly called his family. Covering up for Jeno’s scandal, the higher ups did not say that they knew all about your relationship with Jeno. They would rather choose to believe that you forced Jeno to drink your blood, than accepting the truth that you two are in love. But for now, they remained silent and waited for Jeno’s father to decide about your consequence. 

While you were at the hospital wing saving strength and accepting visits from Yeji and your other friends, Jeno is facing big trouble because of what happened to you. Given that they easily tracked Jeno’s fangs, he doesn’t care at all if the whole school finds out. He just wants to know if you’re safe.

Yes, he is scared to face his parents, but he wants to face them with all false bravery and receive his punishment. He entered the room with all his might, not giving a fuck about the teachers who are in the same room as he is. On the right side of the room, he sees his father staring outside waiting for the sun to rise while he listens to the headmaster talk.

Lee Taeyong, always looked scary to everyone. Even the other vampires wouldn’t dare look at his perfection. Jeno is powerless when it comes to his father and quite frankly his relationship with his own father is as cold as their blood.  

 “Mr. Lee, we didn’t actually catch them do it but it was indeed Lee Jeno’s fangs according to school records… and your son is in a relationship with a human” 

Taeyong turned around to face his son and put both of his hands in the pocket of his trousers, “continue” he said. Obviously, he’s much more interested in the story of how his son became so rebellious after meeting you. Unfortunately, the school found out everything even about your stargazing dates and library dates. It all sounded like a joke to Taeyong which made him laughed and mock his own son. 

“Are you done playing dumb, son?” the tone of his voice was cool. It’s always like that. Words come out from his mouth slowly to send daggers in Jeno’s heart. “I don’t want a scandal for the Lee family, let this be a secret for everyone. Son, I want you to pretend that nothing happened between the two of you. Pretend that you don’t know her, pretend that you don’t love her and this time you will follow the school rules or I will ruin her parent's business” Jeno’s father is a powerful man and the school staffs wouldn’t dare not follow him. “Let Jeno suffer from his stupidity. Nothing can stain the perfectness of the Lee family. Go to church young man, get your blood clean” Taeyong added. 

Jeno was scared. He felt weak and unable to talk, but he has to at least try and fight for you. “We were in love” he croaked, but Taeyong just turned his back from his son and admired the beautiful sunset. 

“I believe you and I don’t care” 

Taeyong knew you are a threat not only to the Lee family but also to the whole vampire kind. If he let you and Jeno stay together, you will serve as hope or inspiration to the other humans and humans will continue to stain the royalty of the vampires. 

And the stupidity of his son is the root of it all. 

The young vampire did not know what to do, frustrated, and mad knowing all too well that he can’t stomach hurting your feelings. Jeno left the room and look for someplace quiet to cry and be mad at his own father. His own father. 

Weeks after being discharged from the school’s hospital, it’s surprising how Jeno is not meeting you in your usual places. He’s not coming to the library anymore to meet with you, no more spontaneous making out while Jaemin is on the lookout, you are left alone in the dark under the stars for the past weekends. It was heartbreaking. You don’t know what’s going on.  

“School’s king and queen, huh? No wonder they seem so close during assemblies. Also, their families are a perfect match. Both untouched and rich” Yeji continues to gossip with Lia while you’re on her side, listening and feeling your heartbreak into pieces. 

Not long after you’ve heard the rumor about Yeeun and Jeno being together, to be honest, you find it as a sick joke that Jeno is playing. You saw them walking hand in hand in the school corridor. White on white never looked so good. So it's true. Yeeun catches your attention and raised one eyebrow at you as if she’s saying, ‘bow down, he was never yours’ 

Again, you got into trouble for looking at Yeeun and Jeno. And once again, the ugly truth slapped you hard in the face. You’ve committed a great sin by loving a vampire, and now you’re facing the consequences. No more, you said to yourself. This time, you decided for yourself and told your parents that you cannot handle the ways of this school anymore. You didn’t tell them about Jeno because that would be a great scandal, you just told them that the bullying in the school is out of hand that it isn’t the right place for you. 

“Did someone bullied you?” your dad asked through the phone, sounding so worried and concerned. 

“No no. I just want to leave before someone does, is that okay? I promise to do good in my next school” 

“Of course. Will get you out of there right away” 

  The school didn’t make a fuss about the situation and let your parents pull you out from the school. At least they’re nice enough to not tell about what happened between you and Jeno. Hearing the news that you are transferring schools, Jeno tried everything, even asked help from Jaemin’s girlfriend but he was too late. You already left, with erased memories.

As part of the school’s twisted rules, graduating from the school is the only way to keep your memories so that students like you, cannot stain the perfect name of the school 127 House and spread false rumors about it.  

Jeno hated himself more but he didn’t cause any more trouble and embraced a sad life without you, from now on. He became colder towards the other students and started to bully other humans, vampires, and teachers. Even Jaemin and his other friends can’t help him and make him stop.  

To feel your presence again, he still goes to the library where you two met and shared hundreds of memories. Relieving every memory, one by one, even staying inside the library in the middle of a hot afternoon. It doesn’t matter if the heat is irritating him, what his father did to him was even more irritating than the sun. 

He still goes stargazing every weekend, torturing himself even more. Looking at the stars with tears in his eyes, hoping that he could hear your voice and feel your warmth again.  

One day, when he was feeding with Jaemin and the rest of the guys and the blood that’s given to him tastes like yours it made him crazy, drank it in one go. He missed you even more than ever, but a lot of horrible scenarios ran through his mind. Why is your blood being donated? Did his parents have you killed? Did something happened to you? He was being hysterical. Jaemin was quick to calm him down and gave his friend another pack of blood, “Don’t make a scene or you’ll get in trouble again. You just miss her that’s why every blood you taste, tastes like her”

“You don’t understand because yours wasn’t taken away from you” Jeno once again pushed Jaemin away but this time he hurt his friend. 

“Jeno, we broke up because of your stupidity and I’m here stuck with you. Drink your blood” Jaemin broke up with his girl because he was scared the school might found out about them too. He would rather break up with her than getting her memories erased and forget about the love that they shared.   

Graduation came and Jeno can’t stomach the presence of his father. Jeno left and graduated from 127 House with pure anger and disgust towards the school and the people who run it. He was ready to move forward and go to college, but he will never want to move on from you. For as long as he can, he will hope and pray for you to come back in his life.

College was another vampire play for Jeno, the only difference is the stage has gotten bigger. To earn his parent’s trust again, he made the family proud and forced himself to get involved with the family business and showed Taeyong that he can be trusted. Build his own life and making himself known as one of the scariest Lee next to his father. All those things were easy for Jeno. He can fake it every day. But the pain of losing you still haunts him every night, that’s what hard for him. 

Jeno grew up to be a fine vampire like his family and live up to the family legacy. When Jeno was all grown up and arranged to marry Yeeun, he was heartbroken again. 

He did found you though, but he can only remain as a stranger so he can’t hurt you for the second time. He always watches you from afar, just like how he first met you at the library. You don’t know but he watches you when you’re asleep, sitting close to you like a shadow. Jeno stayed with you for days, admire you when you sleep, love you secretly. 

Until one night during your sleep, you have this weird dream that you study in a vampire school when you were still young. A vampire so handsome like a god was holding your hand while you were watching the stars with him. Little did you know, they were all flashbacks of every good memory you had with Jeno. 

“Jeno” you murmur in your sleep but Jeno wouldn’t dare wake you up. 

“Y/n,” he whispered back, smiling because he’s hurt but happy at the same time you remember his name even if it’s just a murmur. He kissed you and smelled your blood one last time, even left his tears on your cheek, then left and never came back again.

Omg my #1 inspiration for this fic was my high school life and how I’m always weak and pale all throughout high school. I was a transferee when I was a sophomore and I went to school not wearing uniform but casual clothes. it was humiliating. Also I was cultured shock because it’s so different from the academy that I used to go schooling. ANYWEIZ ALL IS WELL, HIGH SCHOOL FOR ME WAS FUN. 

Vampires were based to Vampire Academy, the twisted school rules were based from Slaughterhouse Rulez. I think Vampire Academy is a great book but the movie was just so so. 

Anyweiz, it’s my birthday today and I wrote this story for myself and tried stretching my imagination. heheh what a challenge. 

Hope you enjoyed reading! 

[fruitcoops]

I love your babysitting jules fic and the tell me how you know your boyfriend won't cheat on you fic. I was thinking, like remus and sirius have a day off and spend it with jules, and sirius goes somewhere and comes back to find remus and jules sleeping on the flour and they look similar and he just smiles.

Idk, hope this makes sense, I love all your fics.

It totally makes sense and it’s super cute! Thanks for such a wonderful suggestion <3 This is Part 4 of Adventures in Babysitting (1 2 3)

Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove!

As much as Sirius loved hockey, he had to admit break days were his favorite part of the week. Most weekends, he and Remus would roll out of bed sometime around eleven, have lunch, go for a walk, and then turn into total couch potatoes if they didn’t have anything important to do.

But they had a kid now, so that plan had to change.

They managed to stay in bed until nine before soft rustling sounds began in Jules’ room—Remus’ aggressive cuddling delayed them for a bit longer, which Sirius did not have any complaints about, but eventually they knew it was time to move.

“Dinner’s at six, right?” Sirius asked as he washed his face while Remus tracked down a t-shirt. Shirtless mornings were another tragic sacrifice while Jules was around.

“Yep. Dumo said we could get there at five-thirty, though. Apparently, Katie’s been dying to see Jules again.” Remus kissed the back of his shoulder as he reached for a toothbrush. “I was thinking we could just let him choose what we do today.”

“Makes it a lot easier on us.”

“And it makes it extra special for him,” Remus mumbled around a mouthful of toothpaste. “We still get veto power, though.”

“That’s probably for the best.”

Jules was still in his bedroom when they went downstairs and for a fleeting moment, Sirius wondered if they had woken up early for nothing. “He’ll be down soon,” Remus said as if he could read his mind, pressing two coffee cups into Sirius’ hands. “All those cool knickknacks in the guest room will keep him distracted for a bit.”

Sure enough, excited footsteps followed a sharp gasp less than ten minutes later. Remus smiled over the rim of his coffee cup and walked over to the pantry to pull out the pancake mix. “Morning—"

“Is it true you won the regional All-Stars when you were in high school?” Jules blurted as he skidded into the kitchen and shoved a small trophy into Sirius’ hands, panting like he had run a mile.

Sirius squinted down at the little figurine; in all honesty, he had forgotten he even had it. “Where did you find this?”

“In the nightstand. Is it true?”

“Uh, yeah, it is.” He set it on the counter with their other random items. “Thanks for finding it, bud.”

Jules glowed under his approval and Remus bit his lip to stifle laughter. “Re, can we have chocolate pancakes?”

“We don’t have any chocolate chips, sorry,” Remus said as he mixed the batter. Liar. Sirius shot him a look, and he stuck out his tongue playfully behind Jules’ back. “We’ve got some fun news, though.”

“What?”

“There’s no practice today and you get to decide what we do.”

Jules’ jaw dropped. “Really?”

“Mhmm.”

“Awesome! Mom and Dad never want to see the cool stuff because they’re busy with museums and games and friends but there are so many places I wanna go,” Jules said in one rushing breath. Sirius blinked in shock, but Remus seemed unfazed as he handed the spatula over. “Thanks!”

“Sure thing.”

“Sirius, what are your favorite places?” Jules turned to him, still licking the spatula like his life depended on it.

Sirius took a moment to think and suppress a smile. “I like the roller rink, and the aquarium, and the park.”

“We already went to the park.”

“We can go again if you want,” he laughed. “You made friends, right?”

“Yeah, but I probably won’t see them again.” Oh, to have a child’s nonchalance when it comes to friends. “The aquarium sounds really neat!”

“It’s pretty cool,” Remus agreed as he ladled out batter into the pan. “They put in a new exhibit recently.”

“Sweet! Can we go now?”

“Don’t you want pancakes?” Sirius asked. “I know I do.”

Jules nodded rapidly. “I do, too. Can I ride on your shoulders?”

“Now?”

“At the aquarium.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“How tall are you?”

Sirius paused, then gave him a conspiratorial look. “Eleven feet tall.”

Remus burst out laughing and nearly burned himself on the pan; Jules rolled his eyes. “Come on. I’m ten, that doesn’t work on me anymore.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Sirius took a sip of coffee. “I’m 191 centimeters tall.”

“Huh?”

“Almost two meters.”

Jules looked over to Remus, who shook his head with a smile. “He’s six foot three, Jules, and he’s messing with you by being fancy and Canadian.”

“How tall are you?” Jules asked, folding his knees under himself to reach the butter with his fork as Remus passed him a plate of pancakes.

Remus sighed. “Five foot eleven and a half.”

“Ha! Short.”

“Shut up, you’re still an Oompa Loompa.”

“I’m more than a foot taller than Oompa Loopmas,” Jules said haughtily, shoveling pancake into his mouth. “I looked it up the last time you called me that.”

“Look at you go! Gold star!”

Sirius cheeks were starting to hurt from holding down his laughter and Remus winked as he passed another plate over. “Thanks, love.”

“Why do couples have nicknames?” Jules asked. “I always thought it was a little weird. Mom and Dad have actual names, but they never really use them. It’s always honey, darling, other sappy stuff.”

Remus shrugged as he sat down with them. “Why do you call me Re? That’s not my full name.”

Jules thought for a second. “Partly because ‘Remus’ sounds like a stuffy old museum name.”

“Oh, and ‘Julian’ doesn’t?” Remus teased. “Usually, people give nicknames because they care about each other. Couples just have an extra level to that.”

“I don’t really like it when people call me by my full name, either,” Sirius added.

Jules frowned. “But people call you by your first name all the time.”

“They do. But my friends usually don’t. There’s Cap, Padfoot, whatever your brother comes up with that day…”

“I call you Sirius.”

“I don’t mind as much when you say it.” Because you’re adorable and I would literally do anything for you. “You can call me whatever you want.”

Jules seemed satisfied by that answer and turned back to his pancakes; Sirius caught Remus quickly looking away when he glanced back up and smiled, giving him a quick nudge with his foot. Baby, Remus mouthed with a slight smirk. Sirius rolled his eyes.

-------------------------------------

The aquarium was busy, but it was a weekend, after all. They only had to wait in line for ten minutes; during that time, Jules made three new friends and every single one of the parents thought he was their son. Even the ticket salesman offered them a family discount that Remus politely declined.

But…it wasn’t a bad thought. Sirius let it ruminate in the back of his mind as he helped Jules onto his shoulders and Remus grabbed a map from the kiosk for when they inevitably got turned around. Definitely not this year, or the next, but someday Sirius did want to say ‘yes’ to the parents and kids discount, though he couldn’t place his finger on why.

And then they reached the whale exhibit. A huge humpback skeleton hung from the ceiling in a smooth curve, its mouth open to reveal perfectly preserved baleen. Jules reached up and trailed his fingers through the space below its massive ribcage—he was too short to touch it still, but the pure awe on his face took Sirius’ breath away more than any deep-sea creature could.

“Baby, can you get a picture of us by the glass?” Remus asked. Ahead of them, a huge tank stretched into a tunnel that lead to the tropical exhibit; Sirius nodded and bent to let Jules down.

“Race you there!” he called, running across the well-worn blue carpet at full tilt. Remus followed him with a laugh and caught him just before they reached the glass, swinging him off his feet by the armpits and turning to face Sirius.

His throat tightened a bit as he took his phone out for the picture. They beamed at him with almost-identical smiles, right down to the dimples. That. That right there, he thought. That’s what I want. “Got it.”

“Awesome, your turn.” Remus put Jules down and began walking over, but an older man motioned to Sirius just before he put his phone away.

“Excuse me, would you like me to get a picture of all three of you?” he asked. A little girl—his granddaughter, perhaps—watched them shyly from behind his legs.

“Oh. Yes, thank you.” Sirius handed him his cell phone and went over to the glass, wrapping one arm around Remus’ waist and draping the other over Jules’ shoulder. They smiled, backlit with blues and greens and aquamarine.

“Alright, I took a few.” The man gave Sirius’ phone back and patted him on the arm as the little girl tugged his sleeve. “You have a beautiful family. Have a good day!”

Sirius didn’t fully snap out of his daze until they were in the tropical tunnel, where fish in colors he could never dream of darted back and forth and fascinated Jules. The aquarium used to be his favorite place in Gryffindor; now, it was probably his favorite place in the world.

Remus led them through a series of corridors, pausing every now and then when Jules scampered toward the next tank, though he seemed to have something on his mind. When Sirius shot him a questioning look, he kissed his cheek and held his hand instead of answering. They wandered past the sting rays, the turtles, and the sharks, until Sirius recognized the multicolored lights from the next room over and stopped in his tracks. “No.”

Remus grinned. “Yeah.”

Jules looked between them in clear confusion. “What?”

“I gotta show you something, c’mere.” Sirius crouched down and helped him back onto his shoulders, then ducked into the adjacent exhibit. Immediately, he heard Jules gasp as jellyfish surrounded them.

“Woah.”

“Isn’t it cool?” His smile was staring to hurt his cheeks. “Here, this in my favorite part.”

Sirius walked to the twelve-foot arch near the middle of the room and stood beneath it, basking in the warmth of the bright lights below as jellyfish of a billion sizes floated overhead. He sighed and leaned his head back slightly to get a better look.

Jules stretched his arms up, trying to touch the glass. “Wow,” he breathed.

When Sirius looked back down, he saw Remus lowering his phone with a small smile. “Had to get a good one,” he said as he stepped under the arch with them and leaned into Sirius’ side. Jules reached down and flipped his baseball cap backwards. “Thanks, buddy.”

“I’ve been waiting to do that for ages.”

“Good to know,” Remus laughed. “Ready to move on?”

“Just a second,” Sirius said, pulling Remus’ arm around his waist. “Just a bit longer. We’ve got nowhere to be but here.”

-----------------------------------------

They did, in fact, have somewhere to be, though Sirius didn’t remember that until 3:30 pm. He also remembered that they were supposed to bring dessert that night and unless Remus wanted to out himself as a liar by busting out the chocolate chips in the cupboard, they needed a plan B.

The grocery store was blessedly empty when he arrived, which meant he could use self-checkout for the two containers of cookies he bought—thank god. As much fun as the aquarium was, there were so many people, and they were everywhere.

I need a nap, he thought as he walked back out to the car and watched his breath steam in the December air. And, like, half an hour by myself to listen to music.

The first thing he noticed was that the house was quiet. Hattie didn’t bark when he got out of the car, or when he unlocked the front door, or called out a hesitant “hello?” while he took his shoes off. Nothing seemed amiss, other than the fact that Jules had been bouncing off the walls when he left.

The living room held the answers to all his questions. Hattie was passed out on the couch, splayed with her belly to the ceiling. Jules and Remus were asleep on the carpet with The Fellowship of the Ring between them; clearly, they had been mid-chapter when they dozed off. Sirius set the cookies on the counter and carefully slid the book out of Remus’ hands, setting it on the coffee table before pulling the thick knitted blanket off the couch.

Hattie grumbled at him and cracked an eye open. “Shhh,” he said softly, kissing her forehead before laying the blanket over the other two. They looked so alike—their hair was nearly the same shade, and Jules’ jaw was only slightly narrower than Remus’. Sirius bet that in ten years, it would be hard to tell them apart in photos.

He crept upstairs and set a timer for 4:30. James had recommended a new band ten minutes before midnight, and Sirius figured he should at least give it a shot if it was so important. He grabbed his headphones, pressed play, and let out a deep breath as he sank back into the pillows.

Half an hour went by too fast, and before he knew it the alarm was ringing instead of the steady bass of the new song. He squinted at the clock, praying it would be wrong, and sighed when he saw that technology had won out once again.

Remus and Jules were still asleep on the floor, though they had cuddled closer at some point and the blanket nearly covered Jules entirely. Sirius crouched down next to Remus and brushed his hair off his forehead before gently shaking his shoulder. “Re. Sweetheart, it’s time to get up.”

“No,” Remus murmured.

“Come on, mon loup, dinner’s in an hour.”

“ ‘m tired. C’mere.”

“I would love to, but we promised Dumo we’d be there.”

“Sirius?” Jules blinked up at him sleepily.

“Hey, buddy.”

“We hafta get up?”

“Don’t listen to him,” Remus said without opening his eyes.

“Love you, too,” Sirius laughed quietly. “I got cookies.”

“Cookies?” Jules sat up fully at that and rubbed his eyes; Remus groaned and rolled onto his back.

“Technically, they’re for after dinner, but an exception can be made.”

Remus stared at him for a moment, then sighed and held his hands up as Jules hurried into the kitchen. “Alright, fine.”

Sirius pulled him to his feet and kissed his forehead. “We’ve got about forty-five minutes before we need to head out, okay?”

“So we could’ve napped for thirty more.”

“You could, but then you’d both be cranky.” Sirius leaned back to look into the kitchen. “Just one, Jules! Save some for Katie and the others!”

There was a beat of silence, then a heavy sigh. “Okay.”

“Thank you.”

Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius’ waist and leaned his forehead against his chest, nuzzling into his sweatshirt. “You’re so soft. And warm.”

“It’s a gift.”

“Perfect place to take a nap.”

“Oh, no you don’t.” Sirius carefully detached Remus’ grip and he exhaled slowly.

“Thank you for picking up cookies, baby. Was there anything else we needed to bring?”

“Just ourselves.” He placed another kiss to his cheek and Remus stretched his arms over his head.

“Oof. Okay. I’ll go get a different shirt on and wrangle the kid if you want to find a plate to pretend the cookies are ours.”

“You read my mind,” Sirius said, earning himself a proper kiss before Remus turned and headed into the kitchen.

---------------------------------------------

They pulled into Dumo’s driveway at 5:40, which wasn’t bad, all things considered. Jules and Katie disappeared in a hurricane of excited rambling as soon as the door opened and Dumo burst out laughing the second he saw them. “Welcome to parenthood,” he said, pulling them each in for a hug. “How are you liking your free trial?”

“I’ve never been more exhausted in my life.” Remus shook his head as he took his coat off. “But I love it, for some reason.”

“That sums it up.” Celeste stood on her tiptoes to kiss each of Sirius’ cheeks. “Did you bring dessert?” He wordlessly held the plate out and she raised an eyebrow. “You remembered at…4 pm.”

“3:30.”

“You’re getting better, mon fils. Marc, Adele, come set the table!” Upstairs, two different sets of footsteps tumbled over each other as they came running down the stairs; both crashed into Sirius for hugs, just like they had when he first moved in.

“Bonjour,” he laughed, squeezing them tight and planting kisses to the tops of their heads. “I hope Regulus hasn’t been driving you too crazy.”

“I think he’s still asleep,” Adele said as she stepped back. Celeste shooed them both toward the dining room as Sirius raised his eyebrows.

“Un moment, s’il vous plait.” Dumo and Remus wandered off to supervise the kids while Sirius headed for the basement door. Regulus was nearly twenty years old—it wasn’t like he needed those blankets at six in the evening, anyway, and Sirius was only too happy to give him a rousing wake-up call. It was his right as an older brother. 

[omegawolverine]

Plesse tell me about queerness in the get down!!

okay okay queerness in the get down let's fuckn goooo

disclaimer: I havent watched this show in full for like 5 months at least, probably gonna get something wrong and/or forget some more important bits. also this wasnt proof read I just word vomited

tws: period typical homophobia, abuse mention, f slur use, bury your gays trope, overdose mention, mention of a creepy possible age gap (the age gap hasnt been confirmed so that's why its possible), cops

going from least to most prominent queer characters, let's start with mylene cruz!

so, from the beginning of this show she has an established romantic relationship with ezekiel (although the status of their actual relationship changes frequently throughout the show) and though this was a relationship she was hesitant to pursue, it is clear that she does have romantic feelings for him and if not for them both having growing careers in very different music genres (zeke specifically working in a genre that she repeatedly labels as bad because she thinks they're ruining records + that it isnt real music because they're using someone elses piece and rapping over it, that's not really important here tho lol) they probably wouldve had a much healthier, smooth sailing romance. that being said theres a few things that happen in the show that, while not explicitly clear, or even really good coding at that—to the point where you wont catch if you really arent looking for it (and trust me, I always look for coding, hers was just so little that it flew over my head until I saw someone else mention it)—are still cool to think about!

so, for starters, I wanna mention the toy box performance, which was performed by mylene and regina, who are best friends. that's all cool and shit, and you dont really think much about it...until you hear about the fact that the show runners purposely colored a lot of the scenes in that performance with the bi colors. like. the writers after the show ended basically said "oh yeah there was plans to make her coding more explicit, but our shit got cancelled soooo" and then dropped the fact that she was gonna be bi (or at least implies bi) in the series, which puts a new twist on a few things.

now, besides the bi coloring in the background of the toy box performance (which was mostly on scenes with her and regina, which involved a lot of uh,, lowkey lewd dancing. with each other. in very revealing outfits. wooooo), there's her music! I dont tend to read too much into this one bc, like I said before, her coding is fucking light and the writers themselves said they didnt really get to do much with it, but I think some stuff with her music is interesting. specifically how her, yolanda and regina's song set me free blew up because dizzee, resident (lowkey enby coded) bicon, got their song played in a queer club. also that the song was majorly important to dizzee and started playing literally right as he kissed a boy for the first time and realized "oh shit I like boys that's bonkers". also that the song can be taken in a gay way since literally the entire thing is about becoming your true self, fully and unapologetically, which is what both dizzee and mylene's entire character arcs are about. dizzee (and a lot of other queer people, apparently), heard this song about being set free and it resonated with them so much that they got that shit most of its popularity.

speaking of dizzee and mylene, they parallel each other a lot in the way that their arcs are about them realizing who they are, coming into themselves and no longer just letting people treat them like shit in a sense (dizzee starting to tell people essentially that they can call him weird all they want, they can make fun of how he acts, what he likes, how he dresses, etc. but he likes how he is and quite literally saying "it's okay to be an alien" as he has consistently compared himself to one throughout the show vs mylene learning that if she wants to be a disco singer she needs to put her foot down, not let anyone, not even the love of her life, not even her abusive father, stop her from achieving her dreams, etc. and continuing to pursue her career with or without their support). one more little parallel that I think is interesting is during I think s2 towards the end of the show is when dizzee and thor are shown together having fun with each other, painting all over the building and each other and are basically just being happy and in love together and then they have these clips of them being interspersed with clips of mylene at a party where she is starting to realize that if she wants to get anywhere she needs to be her own main priority and that she needs to put her career and her dream, which is what makes her the happiest, above all else if she wants to succeed. idk I just think how the show made these two into a weird parallel, accidental or not, is neat. maybe not an explicitly queer parallel, but I think at least how her music and whatnot helped dizzee, the main queer character in this show, blossom, is important.

moving on we got shaolin fantastic also known as "oh no your internalized homophobia is showing-"

so, heres a quick list of...interesting shao facts:

Consistently referred to as fag/faggot (shaolin fanfaggot is my personal favorite); he gets really defensive about this despite nobody actually thinking he's queer, it's just people being assholes to be assholes, and he is the only character consistently referred to using a slur, especially a homophobic one, especially for a "straight" character. dizzee, a canonically queer character, is called a fag less than shaolin is even though dizzee actively goes to gay clubs, has a not so secret dude he "hangs out with" and wont let anyone properly meet, paints his nails, wears less than straight clothes even by the 70s standards and is just all around the definition of fucking queer (and I mean like in the weird way, not the gay way). in fact theres only like once I can remember him being called a fag and it had nothing to do with him actually being gay it was literally just like thrown out there the same way you would call someone a bitch.

Has only shown sexual interest in women, yet refuses to have deeper relationships with women in general (possibly because of trauma but who knows) but takes his relationships with his "brothers", specifically zeke, very seriously

Tells zeke and zeke ONLY his real name when zeke was planning to stop being his friend bc shao more or less got boo boo, a like 14 year old black kid, arrested for selling hard drugs; he was clearly scared and trying to do anything to keep zeke around, literally chasing him down the street and hounding him until he got zeke to stop and argue with him

Kept threatening to beat up zeke in the end but couldn't actually bring himself to do so, instead saying that zeke is "fucking lucky" before walking away

Let's zeke get away with things that nobody else can, in general just has a weird soft spot for ezekiel that he shows with nobody else

when shao found dizzee with thor in a vaguely compromising situation (like they were just shirtless covered in paint sleeping next to each other but shao had also seen everything they painted on the walls ((which some of it was sus)), it was clear they had painted on each others bodies and dizzee had been routinely disappearing with this guy for weeks now yet not producing nearly as much art, at least, as far as we audience members know) he didnt judge him but instead, waited for him to get cleaned up and then told him something along the lines of "theres a reason why im so secretive blah blah blah [not everyone needs to know everything about me]", which, in context, kinda implies that he might be a lil. a lil homiesexual. jus a lil.

whenever even the possibility of zeke leaving him comes up he absolutely loses it. he has literally cost ezekiel life changing opportunities because he thought zeke would just up and leave him for them. this could be abandonment issues bc he's a severely traumatized character, and that probably does contribute to it, but it also is just not a reaction he has to any of their other friends just randomly dipping in and out of his life soooooo

generally speaking, this mfer has got either bisexual with a big hard on for zeke coding or homosexual with terrible internalized homophobia and still a hard on for zeke coding. either fucking way, that nigga gay. he gay as hell. gay as fuck man. there wasn't really much to analyze here tbh bc the coding is just so fucking obvious if you look for it or you are/have been a gay person who's dealt with at least a little bit of internalized homophobia.

also, just a sidenote, idk how fucking old shao, but I'm praying hes like at max 19 bc I'm pretty sure zeke is a minor in this show and shao definetly is not so the whole him being heavily implied to have a crush on ezekiel thing is kinda. oof. not oof if zeke is like 17 but any younger than that? OOF.

edit: apparently the characters are only supposed to be a year apart in age but i had no clue about that before writing this post and since shaos age was never actually stated in the show i naturally assumed he was an adult since his actor Looks Like An Adult. this is definetly on me to a certain extent, but i also never saw anything about this when trying to find our their ages so 🤷‍♀️ maybe i just didnt look deep enough, sorry!

now moving on to the main event...marcus dizzee kipling :]

so, first things first, let's talk enby coding bc him being bisexual was already confirmed!

um, to start off, I just wanna say I dont think this enby coding was intentional or even really coding, it's just moreso me being a dizzee kin on main and knowing as a transmasc enby he has very transmasc enby vibes. for example:

cool, gender neutral nickname that everyone calls him

paints nails various different colors

the whole wardrobe is just a transmasc enby heaven...fishnet shirts, jean overalls, jackets and cuffed pants galore, the big colorful pins, etc

gender neutral hairstyle (when I had my fro it was very sexy and made it easy to transition between hyper masc and vaguely fem, which is pog)

comparing himself to/representing himself consistently with an alien character (though this is meant to represent his sexuality, it could also double as a gender thing too, not neccesarily bc of the whole nonbinary alien trope but bc an enby who likes aliens might heavily identify or compare themselves to whatever their idea of an alien is, whether that just be a genderless entity or a motherfucker with fly style and no need to be perceived as anything other Wacky As Hell)

moving on from there, let's talk about how his queerness is presented to us and how, while it may be a really good piece of representation, especially coming from netflix, it still lacks in A Lot of places.

so, let's start with good things!

i personally really like the get down's queer rep with dizzee bc it's (for the most part) nonsexualized and very very soft, about dizzee figuring himself out and realizing there is a place where he fits in, and about two teenagers in the 70s falling in love over their shared passion for street art. it also features an interracial couple where both boys challenge stereotypes both about queer men and men of color, which is epic poggers and very sexy. this piece of rep specifically is very important to me bc I am a queer black person and even tho interracial relationships are mostly normalized now, I've still had people give me shit for primarily dating white people in a town that is...primarily white lol

mm anyways, I can also appreciate how in the get down, dizzee being represented by rumi the alien is not a thing specifically related to gender (as it often is) and instead is about his sexuality and just in general weirdness and how it has led to him being alienated amongst his peers, poc or otherwise. him seeing himself as an alien is not about just his queerness, which is important, it is about him being a queer black man who talks different, acts different, dresses different and is "soft"—he isnt a walking black male stereotype and he wouldnt have been seen as masculine back in the 70s by any stretch of the imagination. this can be relatable to a wide spectrum of queer poc, from queer black men currently who still have to deal with this shit or to people like myself who are afab neurodivergent mixed race enbies that have always been signaled out as weird and alienated for it. dizzee is god rep bc while he has a small part in this show, his parts are very impactful, hard hitting and show queer poc of all ages that they arent alone and that it's okay to "weird", you just need to embrace it because somebody will love you for you, as thor did for dizzee.

that being said theres um. some minor problemas here,,,

namely:

dizzee and thors first kiss

the lack of development this pairing got

the way dizzee was confirmed bisexual off screen, he never said the words himself, just showed interest in both genders

the way dizzee and thor were never even confirmed boyfriends or just fwb so most of the fandom just calls them boyfriends bc Why Not

dizzee was implied fucking DEAD??? AT THE END OF THE SERIES?????? AND THOR WAS IMPLIED ARRESTED?????????????

now, these might have been things that wouldve been fine had the show been given it's full run but it wasnt which is why we are now left with probelms.

so, from the top, let's go over these: dizzee and thor's first (and only "on screen") kiss was one that was shown in a montage of other queer people making over and doing other vaguely romantic/sexual things, one of those things being a whole ass naked titty being mouthed at, but the actual kiss...was just not shown? like they really did just say "yes they kissed <3 you know this from the context clues of it being in a montage with kissing, hickey giving and titty sucking <3 but no we will not show it <3" LIKE HELLO? I SAW A NAKED BOOBIE BUT NOT TWO MEN KISS??? HUH????????

also, dizzee and thor were both fucking high as hell during this bit like this isnt a terrible thing but it's also like sometimes you do shit when you're high that you wouldnt do sober and they just never kissed again on screen so like?? like idk that's not that bad but it does kinda irk me since they deadass got no other on screen intimacy after that unless you including painting on eacher other or sleeping next to each other on a shitty mattress but not touching at all during it bc they were both at opposite ends of the mattress like half way off it

so yeah, that was trash. then we got lack of development, which kinda goes with the "dizzee being a bisexual but he never says it in canon" thing cause like...okay dizzee was already sort of a side character from the get go like he wasnt the mc by any means, but he became way more of a background character as things continued until we basically only saw him for performances or when he was with thor, yet they got no fucking development as a pairing other than "dizzee realize he gay, he like thor, he and thor spend time together and ig probably do some gay stuff but we dont really know bc we only ever see them do graffiti together now" like?? tf am I supposed to do with that shit. answer. quickly. and then theres dizzee not being confirmed bisexual, which is just a running problem with shows literally doing everything to say a character is bi except for having the character just...say they're bi? which would be so easy? like a good way dizzee and thor couldve had some development is by thor teaching dizzee things about the queer community that he didnt even know existed, thor couldve helped him understand what being bi meant and helped him label himself and whatnot but instead we got an off screen confirmation that the writers had bisexual in mind when writing him. which is garbagé.

the whole thor and dizzee never having a confirmed relationship status is also a development problem cause like literally nobody knows if they were just friends who made out, maybe fucked, who knows, or if they were dating bc dizzee does give a love confession but a love confession doesn't mean there is a relationship, especially since thor didn't say he was in love either (as far as I remember, I could be wrong, plus whether or not that really happened or was apart of dizzee literally overdosing during a performance is unclear so 🤪)

and now for the biggest issue...bury your gays trope.

during the season 2 finale, dizzee and thor are chased by cops after they are found doing graffiti, one of the cops is able to catch thor while the other chases dizzee into a train tunnel and there is a train seen headed straight for him before the show cuts to black on a train horn. the show writers claim that if they had gotten another season, dizzee wouldve been alive but since they didnt and since that's essentially super fan trivia knowledge, most people dont fucking know that and instead had to watch a black queer teenager chose death over being fucking arrested by a white cop. on top of that, thor didnt see any of that shit because he was caught and the cop started hauling him off while dizzee was still being chased so thor literally has no clue where his friend/possible boyfriend fucking is or that he's likely dead in a goddamn tunnel all alone, unless you count the fucking pig that chased him in there who wouldve died too. this shows rep was so fucking good as far as most shows go on not having major fucking problems, on not being toxic and over sexualized, etc, etc. and then they just. killed a black queer teenager for no fucking reason. like it was literally the last episode ever, it would add nothing to the plot, it would just devastate fans and devastate it fucking did. I dont cry easy but seeing a character I identified with, who I had hyperfixated on, die because he'd rather that than be arrested is terrible. it fucking sucked.

so yeah. that's my all too extensive thoughts/analysis on the get down's queerness. theres definitely stuff I missed, or misinterpreted, or looked too much into, etc, etc., but this was a fun thing to spend time writing sooo yeah!! thanks for the ask anon, sorry this was just a big rambley info dump, but hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it since it took like 3 hours at least 😭😭 feel free to ask clarifying questions lol

[celebritytgcaptions]

Requests (5/23/2021)

Hi lovelies! I’ve been getting so many requests & I’m working hard to get all of them in the queue. Thanks for sending them my way! I’m writing to let you know that the queue is now full until the end of June. I was able to get every requests from my May 8th post in there except for a few. Requests from May 8th for captions featuring Katy Perry, Jenna Fischer, Marisol Nichols, Addison Rae, Ariana Grande, Erin Kellyman, Taylor Swift, Billie Eilish, Jhene Aiko, & Kirstin Maldonado will be posted in early July.

But there have been an absolute ton of requests since then too, yay! So I’m listing all the requests that I haven’t gotten to below. If you made a request but don’t see it below that might be for a few reasons. 1) I’ve written it already and it will be posted in June. 2) It’s one of the requests I posted on May 8th so I won’t talk about it here. 3) I considered it a demand not a request (for example, I received two that said “Anything with,” that wasn’t really a request just telling me to do it. Sorry if this bothers some of you but it is an issue with me so make sure you word your requests AS requests). Either way, thanks for the love, lovelies! :D

Anonymous said:

Could you do one with either Kelley O’hara or Alex Morgan from the USWNT about a guy soccer player watching the US win the world cup and then want to be them or something like that?

I actually know who both those are (shockingly enough, I don’t really follow sports) so sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Could you do lorengrey captions? She’s so hot

Sorry sweetie, don’t know who that is. :(

Anonymous said:

Hi I just had an idea for a game you could do. It could be where someone has to say as a boy what they’re like physically in stages. So first stage is hair color for example, second stage could be height, third stage could be body type, etc. An example would be if I was a black hair, short height, thick body type, I would match up with someone like Nicki Minaj. Just an idea which you could extend on. Hopefully it makes sense. I appreciate you!

I actually have a game like this mapped out called “Build a Sissy” where you choose age, hair color, and bra size, but it would take a LOT of work to make so I haven’t written it yet. Maybe some day though. :)

Anonymous said:

I would love to see a Tori Kelly caption. Her hair and body are not typical but beautiful for a white girl. I say that last sentence respectfully. I think having a caption with her would be great

Sure thing! Tori Kelly is a cutie. :)

Anonymous said:

Ok I'm not sure if u'll know these 2 cuz even I had to look them up for the names but anne dudek and maitland ward theyre the 2 blonde sisters from white chicks not sure if uve seen it but if u can could u make a caption for them please?

I DO know who they are! I’ve been thinking about doing a White Chicks caps because there’s a lot of cute looks in that movie (especially for Busy Phillips who I just love) so sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Could u do Yvette nicole brown from community? Id like to see some big girl love

Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

I already know that this request is probably gonna be a No but I still have to ask whats the ruling on GCI enhanced celebrities like Taylor swift from Cats?  Or is that too much like "Furry" stuff. Now I'm Feeling this will be a No for multiple reasons

So it is not an issue with CGI “enhanced” celebrities but for Cats it is because I do not have a Furry fetish and I get uncomfortable thinking about writing caps for it. But I write caps with “manips” all the time (photoshopped images of celebs) so I’m not ruling out CGI enhanced celebs all together.

Anonymous said:

Can you do one of Lindsey stirling? And for the story can it be a guy trying to learn Violin but he cant seem to focus he even tried hot female teachers but it didnt work then he gets a male teacher than he starts focusing and wanting to please the teacher he becomes a sissy sorry its a long request

Sounds fun, sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Hi big fan and I think you’ve been doing amazing work. Is there anyway you could do a story about a guy who loses a bet to sorority girl and is forced to get his nails painted and turned into a girl? I love the idea of having a boys nails painted against his will. I’d love one with Selena Gomez but if you think another celeb would be better I leave that cumpletely to you.

Totally! This sounds fun. :D

Anonymous said:

Can you do thelma and Louise?

I’m assuming you mean Geena Davis & Susan Sarandon from Thelma & Louise so yes. Yes I can. :)

Anonymous said:

Can you do a caption from the movie bridesmaids? Like when theyre all trying on dressess or something?

I haven’t seen Bridesmaids (I know I know) but I can try something. :)

Anonymous said:

it would be super cool if you could do some more games! They’re my fav

Glad you like them! As long as I’m not on hiatus, games will be posted every second Saturday. I’ve already got two set for June. :)

Anonymous said:

Hey huge fan of your recent work and super excited about new caps!! Do you think you could do one about a college guy who drops out in pursuit of being a stand up comedian, but the comedy club needs a female comic so they turn him into a girl? I was thinking maybe Nikki Glaser, she so funny and sexy. Thanks can’t wait to see all your new stuff!!

Oooo, Nikki Glaser is great. Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Can you make a caption about a guy who makes fun of curvy and thicc women, where the women get their revenge and turn the guy into Nia Jax?

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Hi Me again on the topic of the assembly line worker caption sequel if you do it i just an idea for the story like before depicting the sissies "first time"  but you can have it be that the coworker doesnt know and is telling everyone about the chick he slept with last night and the sissy is just thinking "if only they knew"idk i thought it was good anyways thank u again

So this message is in reference to a sequel caption that was requested & that I did write and will be posted in June. I’m sharing it here to let the anon know that I wrote the cap BEFORE I got this second request so there will be a followup but the story will be different. I hope that’s ok.

Anonymous said:

Hi idk if u watch wrestling or not I see u have some captions of wwe womens wrestlers but im not sure have far ur knowledge of it is? Could u do a caption of Rhea Ripley if u know her?

I have never seen a single episode of WWE, I do not watch wrestling, and yet somehow every time someone requests a wrestler I know who she is. Don’t ask me how because I do not know. Anyways, yeah I can do a Rhea Ripley one. :)

Anonymous said:

Could you do a caption about a janitor for sissy co. That finds out the strange goings on at work and tries to blow the whistle on the whole operation but is caught and turned into a sissy maid for the sissy co. Corporate office abit specific I know but ive been thinking on that awhile however u do it will be perfect thanks

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Could you do katheryn Hahn from wandavision specifically the 80s look with the Big hair and aerobics outfit

Oooo, sounds nice. I’ll type that up for sure. :)

Anonymous said:

Hi big fan of your caps!! Do you think you could do a cap where a football player wants to go to the NFL but gets hurt, so they turn him into a female commentator, maybe Lauren Rutledge? If you don’t know her, she’s been a college football reporter for awhile and was also a former Miss Florida. Anyways I just think any guy would be lucky to be turned into her and I love your caps keep up the great work!!

Me: *googles Lauren Rutledge to see if it’s who I’m thinking of* How do I know who this is? Anyways, yes I can write this. :)

...for some reason there are no GIFs of her though so I’m just gonna move on.

Anonymous said:

Hi I'm the one that requested the LONG list of celebs I'm still really sorry about that I didnt realize how many it actually was till I looked back so I wanna retract some for your sake tell ya what if you havent done any already just do the ones that are specifically marked (as in the ones detailed by movie or show theyre in) the ones that are just names you can leave out i knoe its still alot but hopefully that takes some weight off of ya sorry again

You don’t have to be sorry! Like I said, in the future I’d ask that folks limit requests to no more than 3 celebs at a time but you didn’t know that. I’d never said that before. I typed up every celebrity and they’re going to be sprinkled in during June. Hope you like them! :)

Anonymous said:

Hello ^^ I love your work. Can u make a caption with the name "jules" and Ariana Grande please? Thank you

Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Hey, not really an ask, but something I needed to share

I'm the one that asked for the Stephanie Beatriz caption from a whole back, and I absolutely loved how it turned out. Each time you roll out a new caption is like a small thrill to me and I read them right as they're released.

Now this wouldn't be an ask if I wasn't asking something, right? Well, next month sees the release of the "In the Heights" movie, and there's an opportunity there to do a series of captions using stephanie Beatriz from that same movie.

In conclusion, I love your captions so much, you're amazing!

Awww, this is such a sweet message. Thank you! And YAAASSSSS! Ever since the first trailer for In the Heights dropped I was like, “I must write a caption with her in this!” So you can imagine how fun it’s been waiting this entire time. *eye twitches*. We’ll have to wait until the movie comes out for me to be sure I can find a good image but this IS a caption I want to write. :)

Anonymous said:

Hi I just recently came across your blog and fell in love with it!! The caption with the football player being turned into Bella Thorne is one of my favorites!! I’d love so much if you could do a sequel or something to that cap it was so amazing and I need to know what else happens to “her”. I’m not sure if this is possible or if you even do sequels but this cap was great and I look forward to all the others!!!

Glad you like it! I’m always looking for sequel captions to write on Throwback Thursday so you’ll get this for sure. :)

Anonymous said:

Hey big fan! Do you think you could do a caption where a short guy gets made fun of by all his girl friends for how short he is? Ariana Grande is fairly short and I think a caption of her (of age of course) would be awesome

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Can you do one with the bella twins as two guys who fought over the same girl then the girl turns them both into look alikes of her but then they start fighting over the same guy

Yep!

Anonymous said:

Do you know suzy berhow? Or angie Griffin? If so would love a caption of either of them please

Sorry sweetie, I don’t know who those are. :(

Anonymous said:

Would appreciate more Sia captions please when u get the chance

I will remember that. :)

Anonymous said:

Can make some Winnie Harlow caption please? I adore her style

Sorry lovely, I don’t know who that is. :(

Anonymous said:

How about instead of removing the captions with Demi in them ,the images of Demi were just replaced with another celeb and if Demi is mentioned by name in the caption then that could be edited  to mention a different celeb. I respect Demi's decision I do but lets not lose some well made captions. Also if you could please make a caption where Amy Adams feminises a fan and raises them as her daughter and Kristen Stewart makes you her submissive wife that would be appreciated. I'm a fan of them.

So about the Demi Lovato captions: I understand your feelings but I’m still going to delete the original captions. Because of how my captions are made I can’t just go back in & swap out an image or edit the text, I have to remake it from the ground up. I am hoping to do that with some (maybe all) of the Demi Lovato captions & re-publish them, but I’m still going to delete the originals.

I can do the Kristen Stewart one for sure and I’ll TRY to do the Amy Adams one I just am not 100% sure I can find a pic for that but we’ll see. :)

Anonymous said:

If it’s possible before your summer hiatus could you do a caption with Amanda Crew (silicon valley, sex drive)?

I will do one with Amanda Crew but I can’t commit to doing it before the hiatus.

About the hiatus: I don’t know when it’s going to be. I want to TRY to make it to at least July 18th because I have a specific game in mind I want to post for 5 years of Celebrity TG Captions games, but after that I have no idea. I’ve been writing caps for a longer stretch of time since normal since I’ve switched to a part-time blog so I might burn out at any second but for right now I’ve still got some juice.

[kiegosbby]

u better make a part 2 for bakugou🥶🥶🥶

listen before I go II.

of course my g 🥶💯💯 LMAO anyways thanks for asking you guys are giving me distractions so I don’t have to finish my hawks series 😝 anyways enjoy lol

ohhh idk how I feel about this 😐

warnings: just a lot of angst tbh, death.

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

colors flashed and the blackness faded, it felt like you were there for a enternity. Just waiting for something to happen. you regretted jumping you could have got back at him, done anything to make him hurt like he hurt you.

everything went white and your eyes opened on there own. you looked around you, and saw four different people, a tall man with purple patches, a man with a hand over his face and someone in a schoolgirl outfit, and a faceless person, who wore all black baggy clothes. they had conversation while there backs were turned towards you.

“when is she going to wake up? we need to start training her” the tall patchy guy said

“she wakes up when she wakes up, I can resurrect people I didn’t say it would be quick.” the faceless guy said, his voice filled with venom.

the girl in the uniform turned around, and she gasped and ran towards you, everyone else turning around.

“w-what happened?” you voice was hoarse and scratchy from not using it.

“listen to me y/n” The hand guy said “I resurrected you to be apart of my team. I saw how much potential you had and how much you suffered. Now I’m offering to give you a way out. A way to hurt the people who hurt you. my name is shigaraki tomura and I want you to join us, the league of villains.” he said and looked at you waiting for a response.

“how long has it been?” you had so many thoughts running through your head. you’d do anything to get back at bakugo after what he did. of course you would join.. you just needed more detail.

“It’s been 4 months. We needed to wait a while to get you. A lot of people used to visit your grave, but it eventually died down.” the tall patchy man said.

“O-ok i have a couple more questions if that’s ok” Everything was becoming clear, and you knew what you would do. “what happened to ground zero.”

they all looked at each other before the patchy man looked at you. “after your death he was at the scene, and he was crying uncontrollably and then he went on a rampage. it was all over the news, and he calmed down eventually. he’s now with hero ochaco.

you felt your stomach drop and heart break even more then it had before. nothing to hold back on now.

“I want to join. what do you need me to do?”

~time skip to 3 months later~

you had been training everyday since you came back. You were now more strong then you had ever been before. your wings now a dark black from your death made you scary, people feared you. people now knew you as a villain, your name was shi, which meant death. anything and everything in your sight would die.

you had gotten cozy with your villain friends, especially dabi, you had developed a relationship with him and it was honestly amazing. you both had been hurt, been through shit and you helped each other. he seems tough on the outside but when it’s just you and him, he’s a softie.

Today was like any other normal day, you went down to the bar and got a drink from kurogiri. today you had a hiest, you were stealing supplies from a hero outpost. nothing new.

you, dabi, shigaraki and toga got ready, and you took a few new recruits with you.

as you arrived at the scene, there were a few pro hero’s there, what you had expected. you took feathers from your wings and hardened them in the air as they flew towards them, stabbing there throats and watching them fall to the ground.

you walked in thinking there was no one else, and when you saw people unloading a truck, you froze. you weren’t wearing your mask. you were fucked unless you killed them.

“dabi! Get your burnt ass over here and help me!” you shouted and got into a fighting stance. The people unloading the truck turned towards you, and your eyes widened.

it was bakugo and ochaco. of fucking course.

bakugos eyes widened and her smile dropped.

bakugo dropped what he was holding and slowly walked towards you.

“Y-y/n?” he looked confused, hurt, tears started to swell in his eyes and his vision was blurry. Was it really you?

“I go by shi now bakugo.” you had lifted a couple feathers ready to kill, waiting for dabi.

“No y/n is dead I buried her. I watched her die. I held her lifeless fucking body in my arms.” his hands were in tight fists besides him now, and his face covered in tears.

“oh honey. y/n died a long time ago. when you cheated. see when I was brought back I wanted to find you, but when I heard you and her were together I knew what I had to do. look at me now huh? a fallen angel. now bakugo, you shall feel my pain.” your voice was filled with hatred and venom, dabi appeared besides you, lightning one of your feathers on fire, and you sent it shooting towards ochaco. you aimed it perfectly and it stabbed right in the middle of her throat.

bakugo looked over at her and dropped to his knees next to her, he was crying, it made you pity him only a little.

you walked over while the others dealt with anyone left.

“how does it feel bakugo? to have the person you love killed? Do you understand my pain now?” you reached down and grabbed his chin making him look at you, his face full of regret, hatred, and pain.

“I’m sorry y/n.. just get it over with p-please” he sounded pathetic and it made you laugh.

“no no darling. I want you to live with this. I’m leaving you here and I want you to think about where you fucked everything up.” you pulled one of your feathers off and opened his hand, putting it there.

“remember me katsuki.”

[cryonme]

Sunflower

word count- 1.4k

tw- alcohol, weed, cursing? idk but probably, mentions of a bad relationship, some tears, Luke been cute. lmk if I missed anything.

mentions- luke, sage, calum, fiona, sage’s ex boyfriend

a/n- hellOOO!!!! SOO, this is the first part in the Luke + Sage series, but the second in the crazy eights. The beginning of Luke and sage!! I love these two so much and I’m so excited for you all to get to know them!! This is loosely based on Sunflower by Rex Orange County. hope u all enjoy, I love feedback!! xo Roxie.

--

“Sage West!”

Sage took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She’d recognize that voice anywhere.

“Luke Hemmings.” She mustered up the biggest, toothiest smile she could and shot it at him.

“What are you up to tonight, my sunflower?”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Sage huffed and spun around on her heel, making a beeline for the register so that there would be a barrier between the two.

“What?” Luke jogged behind her, leaning his elbows on the counter to get closer to the girl he so adored.

“You seem to keep forgetting the minor detail that I have a boyfriend.”

“That you hate.”

“Luke!”

“Look, it’s a party. Bring him.” Luke slipped you a piece of paper with a phone number and address on it.

“Text me if you have any questions.”

Sage took her second deep breath of the morning as she stared at the paper. She loved Luke. More than she should love a regular customer who seems to only come in to flirt with her. The first time she met Luke she knew exactly who he was, obviously. She worked at a record store, she’s got his albums stocked just about everywhere. She pretended that she didn’t know him, and he tried to pretend like he wasn’t falling in love at first sight. He’s come back multiple times a week since then. Only problem was her boyfriend. Her boyfriend who takes advantage of her kindness and soft spokenness and walks all over her.

She grabbed the paper and shoved it in her back pocket, she wasn’t gonna go, but throwing out Luke Hemmings’ phone number just didn’t feel right.

-

The second Sage stepped foot into the house party she wanted to turn around, run home, get under her covers, and never come out.

Her plan was ruined when Luke made eye contact with her in less than 5 seconds.

“West!” He called out with the brightest smile on his face. Fuck, she loved that smile.

Before she knew it the tall blonde was stopped right in front of her.

“Let’s get you a drink, sunflower!”

“My name is Sage.” She said quietly while involuntarily squeezing Luke’s hand as she took in the party crowd.

He turned to her and smiled, but said nothing. He finally stopped the two of you at a large table in the dining room, filled to the edges with different kinds of alcohol.

“Pick your poison, Sunny!”

“Sage.” The girl reached out her lanky hand and grabbed one of the only unopened beers. “Weed?”

Luke smiled. “Fuck yeah. Let’s find Calum.”

Sage didn’t have to ask who Calum was. Again, the girl worked in a record store.

Luke grabbed her hand once again, she let it slide because if he didn’t she’d probably get lost.

“Who’s house is this anyway?” She asked, but Luke stopped paying attention to her and had his eyes on a crying girl.

“Fi? Hey, what happened?”

“Ask Calum.” She spat and shoved past Luke.

Calum came not too long after, Luke stopped him to let him know he better fix whatever he did.

Once Calum was out of sight Luke turned back to Sage.

“Stupid shits have been in love with each other for years. Took Calum’s joint.” He held up the perfectly rolled paper in his fingers. “Let’s go!” He grabbed her hand once again.

Luke had barely relaxed until him and Sage were comfortably seated on the patio. He pulled out the joint and stuck it between the girl’s lips, holding out his lighter and lighting the end of it.

“No boyfriend?”

“He wasn’t home when I left.” She stated dryly before taking a large inhale of the smoke and handing the joint to Luke.

“Hm.” Luke hummed, not wanting to pry and cause the girl to leave.

“How long you two been together?” He asked, blowing out smoke and handing the joint back to the girl.

“Three years.”

“Damn, Sunny.”

“Why do you call me that?”

“Suits you.” “Hm.” It was Sage’s turn to hum.

“Ya know, sometimes I don’t wanna go home.” Sage said quietly, almost to where Luke didn’t hear her.

“How come?”

“He scares me.”

Luke’s heart shattered. Sage was the sweetest girl he’d ever come across, he hated that stupid relationship she was in. They never saw each other outside of the record shop but when she did mention her boyfriend he’d notice her shoulders drop or her fingers start to fidget.

“So why do you?”

Sage shrugged. “Can’t bring myself to leave.”

“Does he hit you?”

She shook her head rapidly. “No, just yells a lot. Says mean stuff.”

If Luke had blinked at the right moment he would’ve missed her wipe a tear.

“You can’t stay with someone like that, Sunny. That’s not- I mean, being scared to go home? That can’t be love.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“You could stay with me, I don’t wanna see you cry, Sage.” Luke offered in all seriousness. Not a hint of humor in his eyes.

Sage rolled her eyes. “I barely know you, Luke.”

Luke cleared his throat. “I’m Luke Robert Hemmings, I’m from Australia. I’ve got a dog named Petunia, my favorite color is blue, I’m in a stupid band, I have two brothers, and I really like Jack in the box. Anything else?”

Sage laughed, “I can’t, Luke.”

“You don’t have to feel this emptiness.” Luke said.

Sage brought her head up to look at the blond.

“I’m sorry, Luke.” Sage whispered and picked up her purse, making her way to the door. She started to open it then looked back at Luke. “Thanks.”

-

Luke couldn’t go to the record store, he was too embarrassed.

Of course she’s not gonna stay with you, you dick.

“I’m worried about her, honestly.” Luke huffed at breakfast. “Her boyfriend scares her, I mean, it can’t be good.”

“She has your number. I’m sure she’ll call if things get bad.” Calum said, reaching over to grab a strawberry off of Fiona’s plate.

“She had a point, you know. She doesn’t know you.”

“I’m a celebrity. How much shit could I possibly have to hide?”

Fiona shrugged like he had a point.

“My advice? Give it time. Be her friend, help her through it, be the shoulder to cry on right now. From what you’ve told me I can tell she likes you too, but give her time. Relationships like that are scary, can’t really just up and leave.” Fiona said.

Luke nodded. He would wait forever if he had to.

-

About two weeks after the party and Luke had made no contact with Sage. Fiona said she would most likely come to him but he was sick of waiting. He didn’t have a phone number and he didn’t want to upset her while she was at work. Not knowing if he was gonna be able to see her again was killing him.

Luke had just finished up writing a couple verses for a new song when there was a timid knock at the door, he probably wouldn’t have heard it if it wasn’t for Petunia nearly losing her mind.

“Calm down!” He whisper-yelled at the dog as he made his way to the door. Once he swung it open he was met with a very shaky and crying Sage.

“Sage? Come in, Sunny, come in.”

The girl took in an uneven breath and rushed through the door as if someone was chasing her and Luke hurriedly closed the door and locked it before turning to her.

“I didn’t know where else to go.” She whimpered and Luke didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around her.

“We need to get you some friends, Sunny.” He said sarcastically and Sage let out a laugh.

“I guess so.”

“Boyfriend?”

“Out of the picture.”

“Good. Asshole.” Luke huffed and separated himself from her, arms still around her waist.

“Staying here?”

She nodded.

“Tea?

Another nod.

Luke nodded and brought her to the kitchen, making her a cup of tea before showing her to the guest bedroom next to his.

He showed her the bathroom, the clean towels, the extra blankets, and the laundry room.

“Can I come with you in the morning to pick up your stuff?” He asked her once she had settled herself on the bed in her pajamas.

“Please.”

Luke nodded. “Hey, how did you find my apartment?”

Sage could feel her cheeks heat up. “I may have googled your address?”

The boy laughed, “Couldn’t give me a call?”

“Asshole ripped up the paper you gave me. Said I was cheating.”

Luke’s heart sank. He didn’t respond, just walked to her and bent down, pressing a soft kiss to her head.

“I promise I’m the one for you.”

[ddaenggtan]

black irises in the sunshine | kth

anger is everything. other gods tease you for the short fuse, but it comes with the territory. people have called you stupid, have called you dumb, oafish, useless, incompetent, insolent, rude, arrogant. all of it. insults and mockery flung at you, but even your skin isn’t thick enough to deal with constant abuse. it’s the exact reason you keep going to the underground, knuckles bloody and bruised, fighting anyone that dared enter the cage. it’s the reason you go to the clubs, surround yourself with mortals and their writhing bodies. it’s there that you see him the first time, voice husky as it rolls through the room. it’s there you find someone who treats you differently than the rest. you just never expected him to be one of the muses. | monsters and gods pt 3 (masterlist)

pairing | taehyung x reader

genre/warnings | greek god au, calliope!taehyung, ares!reader, theres a lot of violence and it does get descriptive so be aware of that, none of the main characters other than ares get hurt and its not uncalled for or anything in a narrative sense, so just be aware of that; there are mentions of other idols, but if you can guess them you get a cookie because they are Vague; suuuuper bisexual Ares, Ares Can Step On Me, like I am SO gay for her it isn’t funny; explicit smut ft: cunnilingus, taeHUNG bc hes got MASSIVE SCHLONG,  some body worship kind of and then just....regular worship? like? idk how to explain that? lots of praise and lots or orgasms

word count | 14k | cross posted to ao3

a/n | HOOOOOOO this has been sitting in my google docs for literal months waiting for an ending and i decided to try to get it out for tae's birthday bUT that didn't work because i have a Job and shit so YEET I GUESS HAPPY FUCKIN NEW YEAR??? LIKE??? YEEEEEEEEEEEEE this fic is very near to me because Ares is my sweet sad angry babie and i love her, and i love tae and i love suho and i love the muses and i just........lOVE this fic like i think this is currently my favorite of the mag series so!! i hope yall also enjoy it!!!! yall are welcome to send me messages about this even tho I'm terrible at replying to them in a timely manner!! thanks to everyone who helped me with this, and everyone who has expressed interest in it, and everyone who has ever read anything of mine, because you're genuinely the best people ever, and this is literally a gift to y'all because you deserve it. 

Fuck, that was too hard .

The guy across from you goes flying, hitting the chain link wall of the cage harder than you intended. Every nerve ending in your body is on fire, and even holding back, you've got a better buzz than even the best nectar can give. Your blood sings as the guy gets back up, and you almost wish you could remember his name, because he's put up a hell of a fight. For a mortal, anyway. 

He charges at you again, and time slows as your vision tunnels. You can see the feint as he decides on it, how he hesitates in bringing his left up. You wait, watching him get closer and closer. You start to dart to your left, letting him think he's got you, before you side-step and dart to your right instead. His punch goes wide as you steady your balance and move. The top of your foot connects with his ribcage and the resulting crack of bone is lost amid the cheers and yells of the audience. 

Your opponent steps back and you're proud of the way he doesn't show the pain. He doesn't wince, doesn't move to touch the spot you hit, just tightens his stance and clenches his jaw. It's only you that notices the hitch in his breath, the way he flinches with every inhale. Your eyes narrow at that, zeroing in on the rib. You'd meant to just crack it, had been holding back most of your strength to keep from hurting him too seriously, but as he steps forward, you can see the way he grits his teeth against the pain. 

The fight leaves you immediately, like a bucket of cold water straight to the chest, and you drop your hands. 

"Yield." He just stares at you, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "Yield to me, and then go to the doctor."

"I'm not gonna yield," He says. He spits a mouthful of blood out onto the floor. "I'm not weak."

"Seriously, dude," You insist. "You're not gonna win this, and I don't want to hurt you more." 

His scoff has you seeing red. "As if a princess like you could hurt me."

Your fist connects with his face before either of you registers that you've moved. There's a voice in the back of your head reminding you that he's just mortal, he can't take the same kind of beating you can, but it's lost in the haze of fury. The next thing you know, the ref is dragging you away and slamming you into the cage wall. Your opponent is being dragged out - you still don't know his name - and he looks beaten senseless. Victory rolls through you accompanied by a sick satisfaction at the way his blood looks decorating the canvas beneath your feet. 

It lasts for less than an hour. It's always like this; the thrill of the fight, the burn of success, it's gone faster than you can blink. It's what drives you to keep fighting, to keep going to match after match, just to seek out the under-the-table stuff afterwards. It's never enough, not anymore. Back in the old days, they'd let you fight anything. Bears, bulls, lions, giants, anything they could get a noose around long enough to point it at a colosseum. That was a long time ago, though, before all the rights movements happened. You won't lie: you miss fighting beasts like that. The sheer power and strength they have, the survival instinct that makes them such fierce competitors, it's so much better than the rules and regulations of the mortal world now. Fights have gotten dull, rehearsed, more like a performance or a show than an actual fight. People make more money losing than they do winning and it's made the world boring. 

You flex your hand as you open the door to your favorite bar. Something caught it at some point in the last fight, a cheekbone or a tooth, and it stings a little. Doesn't hurt, not exactly, not for a goddess, but it did enough that you feel it at all, which means it couldn't have been anything but torture for the guy on the other end. The bartender waves at you and gets your usual ready as you sit, and you idly wonder if Busted Rib Guy will be okay. It looked painful, for a human, and you'd tried to hold back, but…

Well, you weren't really responsible for what happened to condescending little fucks, were you?

You sip the bourbon, enjoying the burn as it goes down. The lights are dim, tonight. You're glad. You don't want to deal with people looking at you, men coming over to talk to you, trying to advise you on how to properly bandage your knuckles or how to avoid the bruise on your cheek next time. If you had wanted to avoid it, you would have. You'd intended it to hurt worse, honestly, but that first guy'd had a weaker right hook than you expected. 

You look around, wondering if anyone here would provide a decent distraction for the night. There's a pretty brunette in the corner with carefully crafted braids, and as your eyes travel, you imagine what's hiding beneath the silk and leather. You're pulled from the thought by the sound of music, and you curse under your breath. You forgot that it's an open mic night and you'd meant to go to the bar across town instead. Irritation colors your vision; every open mic night is awful, full of lofty poets talking about their trauma and wannabe Taylor Swifts thinking they're on the same level as Sappho. Ah, now that was a girl with a set of pipes. You miss her, wonder what she would say to the butchering of whatever song you're about to hear.

The voice that comes isn't what you expect. It's smooth and deep. The world turns to velvet around you as the voice wanders from one speaker to another, creating a mesmerizing multi-dimensional effect despite the way the singer doesn't ever leave the stage. You turn, knuckles white around your bourbon glass; he's utterly magnetic, every eye in the room trained on him as he purrs into the vintage mic. Long fingers are wrapped around the scuffed metal, decorated with jewels that glitter in the dim light of the bar. You can smell the lingering cigarette smoke from the guy beside you and the Jäger from the girl two stools down and for once, you don't even care. He's captivating, voice travelling between speakers in the bar and coming from everywhere and nowhere at once. 

Your eyes don't leave him, and you wonder if you can memorize the way the blond waves fall against his forehead if you stare long enough. 

The red seeps away from you, slinking back into the corners of your mind, settling once more into a low thrum under your skin. It fades into the background of this man's voice, the charisma that rolls off him in waves as he pulls the mic in close just to push it to the side with a teasing smirk. It settles something in your chest that hasn't been calm since the fight in Athens so long ago. 

The music fades out sooner than you'd like, and he gives a slight bow before wandering into the crowd. You do your best to follow him, but the gold of his hair disappears almost immediately, lost in the throng of people around the stage waiting to speak to him. You turn back around, downing the next bit of bourbon that Suho pours you. 

"I know," He says with a grin. You cock a brow at him, not having said anything he could agree with. "He's good. That's what you were thinking, right? He's why we're so packed on open mics. Got the audio and lighting guy whipped, so he's got all these special effects, too. Drives people crazy.”

"He's alright," You mutter. You toss a few bills down on the bartop and step back. Suho gives you a courteous nod as you leave. The bouncer gives you a dirty look when he spots the lit cigarette between your lips, but he knows better than to try to tell you otherwise. You've taught him better. 

You lean back against the brick wall of the alley and take a drag. The warm smoke fills your lungs and you close your eyes. It's a different kind of burn than you're used to, a distraction from the crawling sensation that drives you to fight. It's calmer, more controlled. Feels like the smoke from Hestia's fires. Feels like home. 

"Never expected to see you here," A voice calls out. It's deep and startling in the darkness, but you don't jump. You just open your eyes, exhale, and look to where it came from. 

The singer stands before you in the same undone white button up and black tee he performed in. He doesn't have a cig, doesn't seem to have much of any reason to be outside. He moves almost lazily, as if he doesn't even need to, just wants to, and when his gaze flicks up to meet yours, your vision fills just for a breath with every opponent you've ever faced lying at your feet. 

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" The words slip from your tongue before you can stop them. It's not his fault, the voice in your head says, he didn't mean it that way, but still, your blood is thrumming now that he's here and you want to know what he's talking about. Want to know why he thinks you wouldn't be here when there's attractive people and good bourbon and you've never seen this man before in your life. Want to know why he already seems to think you aren't civilized enough to be at a bar, why he spoke but all you heard was Zeus' voice in your memories.

"Exactly what I said. Should I be clearer?"

"Yeah, probably," you spit. Yet another person that assumes you're stupid, that you don't understand basic languages, as if you haven't been speaking them since the ancient times. As if you couldn't speak circles around him if you wanted. "Unless you want your teeth on the fucking ground."

"Good to know the stories are true." He tsks and you're filled with a strange sense of disappointment and fury, both at him and yourself. Your vision turns red at the edges and the cigarette between your fingers is crushed in your grip. He pays no mind to it, just saunters past with a lazy, swaying gait that draws your eyes to his hips and then down the long leather-clad legs. "See you around, Ares."

"That's not my fucking name," You yell after him. He doesn't respond when you shout your actual name, the one you chose, on your own, as a middle finger to the Olympians. "Get it right next time, dickwad."

He turns the corner of the alley and the streetlight catches his face just enough for you to see the smirk he wears. For once in your life, you're torn; you want to smash his face in, yes, because how dare this random guy speak to you like that when you could kill him with one finger to the right pressure point. You also find your skin's hotter than usual, stretched too thin over your bones, and you want him to run his hands over you until it feels right again.

Until it feels like it did when he was singing. 

How did he know my title?

The thought comes unbidden, days later, with the desperate hit of a palm against your shoulder. You've got the woman in a headlock, patiently waiting for her to pass out completely so the fight can be called, and your mind is wandering. 

How did the singer know who you are? You hadn't thought anything of it at the time, distracted by fury and frustration, but with time comes a special kind of clarity. You've never seen him before, not that you know anyway, yet he didn't hesitate to call you Ares. The only ones who know of your kind are your kind, but you haven't seen any of your siblings among mortals in a long time. You thought you knew the other gods and goddesses, but maybe not. It has been a while since you stepped foot in the golden city.

The woman in your grip goes slack and you release her. You're still lost in thought as the ref calls the match and leads you out of the makeshift ring. The cheers of the audience are background noise at this point, akin to static or the buzz of electricity, and you pay them no mind as you head to collect your winnings. You didn't even get any kind of buzz from success this time, too immersed in the way the singer walked and talked and looked. The image of his smirk is burned into your retinas. 

"Yeah, you didn't hear? He just got out of the hospital. They had to keep him overnight because they thought he might puncture a lung. I heard that if it had been a little worse, they would've had to wire his jaw shut." You stop, fingers brushing over the stack of bills you don't even remember being handed. You look up, making eye contact with the guy whispering nearby. Your suspicions are confirmed when his friend smacks his arm and juts his chin in your direction before they both disappear into the crowd. 

You shove your way outside, frustration creeping through you and coloring your vision. You manage to keep it contained long enough for you to make it to the alley behind the warehouse, but it explodes from you in a rush of thrown dumpsters and sheet metal. 

Fuck , you never meant to hurt him like that. You told him, you fucking told him to yield, it isn't your fault he didn't listen. It's not your fault that he went and insulted you, acted like he was better than you just by virtue of being a dude, as if you weren't worshipped in the old days for the power you had and the blessings you could give. You'd held back, through all of it, you'd told him to yield, and he insulted you. It wasn't your fault. 

You slide to the ground, running a shaking hand through your hair. It isn't your fault , you repeat. You close your eyes and take deep breaths, the way Hestia taught you, willing the fury to dissipate. It's like a fire in your veins, burning and bubbling your skin until you can't resist anymore. You take another breath. It isn't your fault. You tried. You offered an out. It isn't your fault. Fuck, what was his name? 

With a growl that quickly morphs into a scream, you kick the dumpster once more before stalking off into the darkness. You need a fucking drink and you're gonna find a distraction in someone else if it's the last thing you do. 

The club is packed when you get there; you're not usually a fan of clubs like this, too full of people who are too friendly, but they're perfect for nights like tonight. You don't even need to wait in line, just slip the bouncer a 50 as you pass, and the bartenders are quick to spot you. You're pretty notorious in the city for over-paying, which means you're knocking back bourbon before you have a chance to ask for it. There are people everywhere, pressed up against both sides of you while the bass thrums in your throat, and it takes you longer than you're proud of to realize why. 

There's a band playing, apparently. They're not bad; the vocalist isn't anything like the singer from Suho's, but it doesn't make you want to tear your ears off, so you consider it a success. 

You're dancing before you remember deciding to. Everything's a blur when you get the itch in your bones, the need to make someone bleed. To feel something that isn't rage or condescension. People are even closer here on the dance floor, suffocating in their proximity, but there's a woman grinding her ass into you, and it sparks the dying fire in your gut. The beat of the music drowns your own heart, and it's all flashing lights and heat and a body pressed against yours that is all too willing.

She follows when you go back to the bar for another drink, and giggles when you lick salt from her wrist before downing tequila. Her hands are wrapped in the leather of your jacket as she kisses you, your own resting lightly on her hips. She laughs against your lips and says something you don't hear before ordering another drink. Something makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

You take the brief reprieve to look around the club, searching for whatever it is that has you on alert. You find him on the upper level of the club, leaned over the balcony with a drink in hand. You can't make out his expression, exactly; it's too far away and too guarded. But you'd know him anywhere now. The singer knocks back whatever's in his glass, eyes never leaving yours. You don't know why he's here, if he comes here often or if the Fates are having a laugh at your expense, but you do know you want to make the most of it.

The girl is back, pressing a heated kiss to your lips and drawing your attention from him. You return it, nipping at her lips and getting a small gasp in return. You smirk and bite your way down her neck. She's breathy in your ear, hitched moans lost in the beat of the music, but you barely hear her as you suck bruises into the skin of her neck. He's still watching you. His drink is gone and he's gripping the bannister of the balcony, rings glinting in the light. You wonder if the cool metal could soothe the burn in your bones. You want to know if he can bring that calmness from before back, if he can soothe the frenzy in your mind with his hands the way he can with his voice. Just imagining it has you soaking through to your jeans.

The girl makes a particularly loud noise in your ear and you're brought out of your thoughts. As if he can sense it, the singer straightens. He gives you one last look before disappearing back into the crowd, and you wonder if you're imagining the disdain in it. You draw back from the girl's neck, about to tell her to find her friends when she slides her hands in your hair and tugs.

The burn in your blood is back, now, and you hope this girl is prepared for what awaits her.

"You're here early," Suho says when he spots you in the nearly empty bar the next night. He's not wrong, either; you skipped the fights tonight completely. There was no buzz last time, no relief, and you have no reason to believe there would be tonight. Not with the way the singer captivates your thoughts. 

Besides, you have enough money leftover from the previous few to last a couple days.

"What, did you decide not to kick someone's ass before getting wasted?" Suho doesn't wither at the look you give him, just pours you a couple fingers of bourbon and slides the glass over. "Or did they just stop letting you in completely?"

"I might change my mind if you don't shut up," You tell him. There's no real heat behind it. You've known Suho for years now, been coming to his bar for so long it almost feels like home. You're almost friends at this point. 

It helps that he knows when to bite his tongue so he doesn't get his teeth knocked out.

"Seriously though, I don't think I've ever seen you here this early. Especially not on mic nights." You're very careful in your lack of a reaction to his words. You'd seen the workers setting up for it when you came in, and even if you hadn't, you know when mic night is. You've spent enough time avoiding it.

"Does he sing every time?" You ask in lieu of an explanation. You don't look away from the amber liquid in your glass, letting the silence hang as the bartender does his best to follow your thought process. 

"Taehyung? Most weeks, yeah. It's been a nice change from the usual drunken karaoke. He goes around to some of the other places in town, too. Apparently he just likes to sing." 

"Taehyung," You repeat. The name rolls from your tongue a bit awkwardly. It's more than you expected, somehow, but you can't place exactly how . Just...more. "Is he always that good?"

"Oh, yeah. We have regulars now for mic night because of him. He's got a whole fan club and everything."

"Hm." You drain the rest of your bourbon and Suho refills it. He leaves you in peace then, serving some others that appear at the bar. 

The place fills faster than you can blink. That's what it feels like, anyway. It's like one moment there's you and a handful of other people scattered around, and now you're being jostled between some dude a million feet tall that definitely doesn't look old enough to be here and a girl with her tits up to her throat and surrounded by a cloud of perfume so thick that it starts a migraine behind your eyes almost instantly. She flirts with Suho a little, likely trying to score free drinks, and you roll your eyes. She pouts at him when he gives her the total, batting eyelashes that go on for miles, and for once, you wish Suho would just give in and comp the drinks. 

"I'll pay for them," You say. She was definitely saying something, maybe you should have been paying attention to it, but fuck , this migraine is only getting worse the longer she stands there. "I'll pay for your drinks."

"Oh, thanks," She says. Her smile is hesitant, and quickly turns apologetic as she takes in the boots and the ripped jeans and the leather jacket. "Um, I'm not...I don't, uh…"

"Do I look like I want to fuck you, sweetie?" She looks a little affronted and a laugh escapes you. You lean closer, letting your breath ghost over her cheek as you speak in her ear to be heard better. "If I wanted to fuck you senseless, you'd know it. And I can guarantee you it would be a hell of a lot better than the watered down rat piss this guy's giving you." 

When you lean back, her face is flushed and she's stammering. You smirk and hand her the drinks she'd ordered. 

"Too bad you’re not, you don’t, huh?" You tell her. The patronizing tone isn't lost on her, nor is your mockery of her earlier words, and she shuts her mouth with an audible click before strutting off. Suho glares at you as he pours more bourbon.

"Can you please try not to run off my patrons?" He mutters. "Some of us actually need money to live."

"Some of us would like decently timed refills and to not choke on perfume," You quip. "And better bourbon, for that matter." He hisses something about what he's giving you being top quality but you tune him out, throwing one leg over the stool Perfume Girl vacated. You'd like to keep just a little bit of personal space. 

Across the bar, you catch a brief glimpse of the girl from the night before and you wince. Her neck is thoroughly bruised, and you catch a peek of bruises and scratches on her back as she shrugs her jacket on. You didn’t mean to be so rough with her, even if she had been into it; you’re usually pretty good about remembering that the mortals are just that - mortal - and as such have to be handled delicately. They’re so fragile, it feels like they could break with a strong wind. Guilt settles in your gut and turns the bourbon in your glass to cough syrup. You’ve half a mind to just leave before she sees you, are about to turn and do exactly that, but the speakers screech to life and the deafening feedback from the mic keeps you glued to your seat. 

The crowd quiets even as the excitement ramps up, all talk silencing but for the occasional hushed whispers here and there. The first few notes of the song echo through the speakers, and a spotlight appears on him. 

He looks different this time, his hair dyed a vibrant blue that matches the glinting jewels in his ears and on his hands. He's an absolute vision and you wonder how Aphrodite has allowed him to live so long when he's so beautiful. His voice hangs in the air and calms you, the same settling in your chest as last time, the same freedom from the burn in your veins. It's addictive. 

The song doesn't last nearly as long as you want it to but the stillness inside you lingers long after he's done caressing the microphone. You place a few bills down for Suho and light up a cigarette as you head outside, ignoring the dirty looks from other patrons as you do. You're on a mission, the thrum of bloodlust returning with every second that passes, and you can't even be sure if he's still around or if he's wandered off already. 

You stand in the alley for what feels like hours, turning at every sound and smoking cig after cig just so you have something to do. You've almost decided to say fuck it when footsteps sound from the back of the bar, coming closer to you. 

His blue hair is visible even from the other end of the small alley, a giveaway similar to the light at the end of your cigarette and the smoke you blow into the air. There's no way he hasn't seen you, you think, you're making no effort to hide or be sneaky, and yet he's continuing forward as if he doesn't see you at all, eyes focused on a phone in his hand. You wait until he's just a few steps away before speaking.

"How do you know my title?" You ask him. He stops as if he'd always meant to and doesn't even bother to glance up at you or respond. The edges of your vision turn scarlet at the blatant disregard and you're speaking before you can even process the words. "I asked you a fucking question, pretty boy, you're gonna answer me. Unless you want that precious mouth bloodied up."

"And you wonder how I know who you are," He drawls, still not bothering to spare a glance at you. A scowl grows over your face at his sarcastic tone. "If you're going to hit me just get it over with. Otherwise, I have places to be."

He stands, waiting and expectant, but you don't move. He's humming, quiet and to himself like he doesn't even realize he's doing it, and the red seeps away from your mind until you're left clear-headed once more. You sigh, long and heavy, and crush your cigarette into your denim-covered thigh to put it out. It tickles. 

"I'm not going to hit you," You tell him eventually. "I just wanna know how you know me. And how you do it."

He cocks a brow at that, finally looking up from the phone in his hand to level dark eyes on yours. "Do what? Sing?"

"No." You swallow around the sudden lump in your throat. The words are harder to find than you thought they'd be, lost in the depths of his gaze, in the clarity you're so unaccustomed to, in the way you feel like you can breathe for the first time in days. "I don't care how you sing, that's not important, it's the...fuck, you know what, never mind, it doesn't fucking matter." You push off the wall and step past him to head towards where the streetlight gleams off the bar windows. 

"Tell me." The command has you stopping in your tracks, and you're again flooded with just wanting to know how. How he clears the haze, how he stops you, how he makes you feel real. You turn, hands stuffed into the back pockets of your jeans. "How I do what?"

It takes you several long breaths before you can answer, and you aren't even sure he can hear you over the sounds of people leaving the bar, and you find yourself disappearing into the crowd without waiting for a response. Your own words are reverberating in your skull, getting louder with each step you take, and you wish you could just turn it off . 

"How you make me feel like a person again."

You avoid the bar for a few weeks, going hours away from your usual area to an unfamiliar hole in the wall just to make sure you don’t see him. You’re more deadly than usual in your fights, victories coming quicker, injuries piling up along with the guilt, but you can’t bring yourself to return. It’s unnerving, the way everything goes quiet around him, the way you can think, but the worst is the way you can feel. Everything’s calm and steady and blue, and it only makes it easier for the regret and the guilt and the anxiety to curl around your throat and squeeze until you can’t breathe, to clog in your throat while the laughter of your siblings echoes in your ears, and you...can’t. You can’t do that, you can’t let it win, you can’t let them win, they can’t know that you’re everything they think you are and worse. 

You can’t let yourself drown in that, and yet you find yourself back at Suho’s, lost among the crowd while Taehyung’s voice surrounds you. The ache in your bones fades away, chased by the thrum of the fight that still lingers despite the hours that have passed since you felt your opponent’s femur break under your palm and their screams echoed in your ears. Everything is calm again, and the guilt nearly drowns you.

He hasn’t even finished singing before you’re outside, chest heaving as you gasp against the weight on your chest. You broke someone’s femur , and did you even really need to? The fight itself is a blur even now, snapshots playing through your mind like a montage. The way they’d darted at you first, how their foot felt connecting with the backs of your knees, the determination in their eyes when you went down, the jolt of shock as your hands wrapped around their leg, the dull throb of a barrage of hits against your waist as you pulled them down as well and bloodied their face, the blood-curdling scream as you snapped the bone like a pretzel stick.

Your breath comes faster in your lungs, forced out by the growing guilt that lodges there in its place. Images swirl in your mind, chased by a never-ending stream of thought and regret that you should be used to by now. Fuck, you didn’t need to, and you still did it; you lost control, you fucking hurt them, and for what? A couple hundred? Was it even worth it? Who knew when they’d be back into shape to fight, what if they needed the money? They weren’t even half-bad. They got you down, at least, shouldn’t you have gone easy on them? You don’t even remember their face, can’t remember what the announcer said their name was, words drowned out by the buzz under your skin.

Metal crumples under your grip and you spare a half-second to mourn Suho’s dumpster before you slam your knuckles against it. It tingles, not even real pain, and you don’t hesitate to repeat it. By the time the metal is disfigured completely, a distorted mess of paint and steel and garbage, you still aren’t in pain, but there’s a sheen of gold across your knuckles and you feel less like you’re drowning and more like you’re suffocating. The usual. You can handle that. You think. 

You don’t even realize that you’ve slid down to the ground beside the dumpster until the back door of the bar opens and footsteps echo through the alley. You wish you knew how long you’ve been here, how long you’ve sat among empty bottles and stale beer and broken glass, but you can’t be sure. The brief reprieve brought by Taehyung’s voice is long gone, chased away by the guilt and rage that still sits heavy in your chest. You hope you’re not noticeable here, that whoever’s left will just pass by and leave you to piece yourself back together on your own. 

Voices tell you that it isn’t likely, the deep baritone of one too familiar to ignore. The other is new, but you’re familiar with the tone, the inflection, the intent behind it. You've heard it before, in crowded clubs as a guy pushes too close to some girl who can barely stand, in a coffeeshop when a random customer can't take a fucking hint, at the local campus when some professor insists that there could be maybe one thing her student could do to pass. It makes everything in you curdle, the bourbon from earlier threatening to work its way back up; it screams predator , and you absolutely refuse to let anyone fucking talk to someone like that, like they have some right to whatever it is they want. 

You refuse to let someone talk to him that way. 

"Seriously, Kratos, didn't I tell you to leave me alone? Did Aphrodite not teach you your lesson last time you harassed someone?" Taehyung's voice brings a calm that's an unsettling match to the anger washing over you. You're used to the red at the corners of your vision, the tint to everything you see, but you aren ' t used to the way it all turns purple and focused and clear . 

There's no haze this time, there's no abrupt shift of you moving before you know you've done it. You can feel the glass crunching under your boots with every step you take, can feel the way the air has a chill that creeps down into your lungs with every breath, can almost taste the apprehension that's rolling off of Taehyung despite his relaxed stance. The only thing that gives him away is the tense set of his jaw and the mix of relief and fear when his eyes land on you. 

"I'm pretty sure he said no, Kratos." The god turns at your voice and you watch the realization wash over him as he realizes what - who - you are. 

"Been a while since anyone's seen you, Ares." He scoffs a little, not moving from where he has Taehyung caged against the wall of the bar, one hand pressed firmly into the brick. He's entirely too close, and you have no doubt that the stench of him permeates the very oxygen around them. 

"Been busy. Doesn't change the fact that the man said no. Take the loss, walk away." Kratos' eyes narrow at your words and he steps away, but only to move closer to you. 

"Why do you care so much? You've never been one to care about any of us before." Kratos inches closer and the hyper-focus that Taehyung's voice causes starts to melt away with every twitch of your fingers. You've never liked Kratos, all brute strength with no respect for the challenge, no appreciation of the fight, too focused on sheer power and exhilaration. He is the worst of the worst of the worst of your kind, of all the war-focused gods. Every bit of yourself you hate is every piece that Kratos loves about himself. 

"I care that you don't seem to be able to understand when someone doesn't want to be around you, you absolute piece of filth. Taehyung had a point though, I really thought the whole thing with Aphrodite would've taught you how to back off. Or should I pull the video out, I think I still have it saved for when I need a good laugh." Malice and fury twitch across the other god's face and you absolute revel in it. You can feel his anger prickling across you, like needles in your very pores, and you ache for it. It's been so long since you last had a good fight, a real challenge where you didn't need to hold back at all. 

Too long since you fought a god like yourself.

"You're testing my patience, cousin," Kratos spits. It's a little generous to call the two of you cousins - you're several times removed, at best, and potentially closer than that with your family's warped history - but you let him have it. It might make him feel better. "I'm having a conversation, that's all. And if said conversation means that we end up back at my place, then, well, can anyone really blame me for what might happen to this pretty little m-"

Your fist connects with his jaw immediately and the red floods you for the few seconds it takes to register Taehyung calling your name. The calm struggles for a second, warring with the rage, but it wins out eventually. The singer's talking, but you can't make out any actual words. You're too focused on Kratos, the way he's righting and readying himself for a brawl. There's a fire in his eyes that matches the one in yours and everything in you feels alive for the first time in too long. 

This fight is different than your usual ones. There's no blur, no warped sense of time that usually comes with the adrenaline. You're focused and controlled in a way you haven't had to be for centuries, careful and precise and deliberate with every swing and every kick. The red seeps back in slowly and every time you think you're about to lose it, you hear Taehyung, still pressed against the wall of the bar. 

Kratos lunges at you for what has to be the tenth time, clearly trying his best to knock you to the ground - he succeeded, once; you let yourself get distracted, too caught up in thoughts, but it didn't last long - and you sidestep him just in time for him to ram into the ruined dumpster instead. He looks pissed when he turns back around and something in you sings at the sight. He makes for you again and you dodge again, only to be dragged back towards him by the grip he has on your jacket. Fuck, should've taken that off , whatever, he's too close.

Pain explodes in your side and you're fairly sure he's busted part of your rib, but you just slide your arms out of the sleeves and twist to plant your knee straight into his gut and then slam your heel down onto his much-less-safe toes, and then back up to knee him in the groin. It's nowhere near enough to take him out, but his nose is oozing golden ichor and he groans with every shift of his weight, and you've got him pinned against the wall with your forearm pressing hard into his windpipe. 

"Now, you're gonna listen to me you steaming pile of dog shit," You hiss. "When someone tells you no, it's not a fucking negotiation. It means you fucking leave and find someone with loose enough morals or enough internalized self-hatred that they're willing to subject themselves to your absolutely pitiful fucking excuse of an existence for the thirty-two seconds it'll take for you to get off." 

Kratos doesn't respond, just sneers and spits blood at you. It's a miracle you don't actually try to rip his head from his body, because the thought crosses your mind for a second too long. Instead, you just press harder against his windpipe and enjoy the choked gasp that it draws. 

"You don't stalk people either, the way you did with 'Dite. Don't you know it's better to let them come to you sometimes?" You tsk, ignoring the way he claws uselessly at your arm. Gods may not need to breathe, that's a fact, but they feel pain, and there is no way this isn't absolutely excruciating for him when even you can feel the small bones in his neck cracking and breaking. "And if I hear even a whisper of you pulling shit like this again, then I'm gonna find you, you pigshit. And when I do, I won't hold back even the slightest, and do you know what comes after that?" 

His eyes are full of fear now, and only grow wide with terror as you lean in close enough that he can feel your lips against his ear as you whisper. 

"You are going to wish that you could die." 

When you do release him, he disappears instantly, with a cloud of acrid grey-green smoke curling around your ichor-spattered boots. He's only been gone a second when you slump, the adrenaline fading as quick as Kratos had left. Your side is throbbing now, your knuckles are bruised and broken and gold, there's a pain in your leg that you aren't sure what's causing, your head is screaming even through the high of the fight, your face stings in the crisp-cool air. Every breath makes the pain worse so you stop breathing. The brick wall of the bar is rough against your palms, but it's the only thing around that can keep you upright, so you'll take it. 

"Well," a voice drawls from your left. You'd jump if you had anything left in you, but every ounce of energy is gone, spent teaching Kratos what Aretha Franklin meant when she sang about respect - and really, there was another fantastic singer, you really should visit her sometime soon - so instead your head lolls to the side. You aren't sure what it is that jolts through you when your eyes land on Taehyung, fingers curled carefully around the collar of-

Your jacket. That's your leather jacket. You barely remembers shrugging out of it, but you're glad it's not on the ground, trampled and covered in the gold spatters that decorate the rest of your body. 

"Well?" You echo, wincing at the pain it causes. You've definitely got a busted lip, that's for sure from the way it feels different and swollen, and you're pretty sure there's a head wound, too, because you don't remember there being a golden halo around Taehyung before the fight. 

"Well," He repeats, slinging the jacket - your jacket - over a shoulder. "You should get that looked at." He starts walking, making his way to the entrance of the alleyway. He gets halfway there before he stops and turns and cocks a brow. "Are you coming, or do I get to keep this?" Your jacket waves a little, as if he's wiggling it, and it makes you feel like a stray dog being lured off with treats. 

You're never going to tell anyone that it works.

Taehyung's place is as nondescript as the car he parks outside. It's a plain apartment building on the outside - looks like maybe it was a hotel back in the 1930s, based on the outdated carpeting in the lobby and the grate on the elevator he steps into. Even the hallway is plain and unassuming as he leads you to the end and uses an old, tarnished brass key on an older, more tarnished brass knob. You aren't sure what you expected, you can't even begin to guess what Taehyung is like outside of the dirty alley or the stage where he sings, can't fathom what kind of decor he could possibly have. 

What you step into isn't anything you could have guessed. It looks like he has the entire rest of the floor to himself based on what you can see, but there's also a spiral staircase tucked into a corner, bookshelves built in under each step that are filled to the brim, and a fireman's pole in another corner, so there's at least one more level above this, but something tells you both the staircase and the pole continue past that. There's artwork everywhere, pieces you recognize and pieces you don't, several van Goghs and a couple from Matisse and you think in the corner you spot an actual fucking da Vinci sketch that's supposed to be somewhere in Europe. There's a gramophone beside a top-of-the-line sound system, an entire wall that's just a record collection, books upon books, framed bits of poetry - including an actual hand-written rupi kaur, a signed Maya Angelou print, and a signed cover of ain't i a woman by bell hooks that you would die to know how Taehyung got his hands on. It's a museum's wet dream and yet it retains a lived in atmosphere. There are mugs left on tables, blankets strewn about as if someone just got up from a nap, an easel propped up by a far window with what looks like an impressionist painting of the cityscape, books tossed down half-read with receipts and coupons and candy wrappers and everything but a bookmark tucked between the pages. 

It feels like a home and it makes your heart flutter in your chest at the same time that something in your stomach shrivels up into itself. 

Taehyung walks like he’s meant to be followed, so follow you do. You spy another man - older, you think, but it’s hard to tell, really - sprawled across a couch, blanket splayed across his lap as he watches some kind of dance show on a flatscreen hung above a warm and roaring fireplace, a couple of girls in what looks to be the kitchen, one sitting on the counter while the other stands between her legs and pretends not to notice the former stealing strawberries from her bowl as she taps at her tablet, and there are footsteps creaking above you, hidden behind walls even as Taehyung leads you up the staircase. They all look up when you pass, but only the man gives you a second glance; his eyes are a weight on your back that doesn’t leave until you’re upstairs and following Taehyung into a large, rather nice bathroom. 

It’s vintage as well, but it’s spacious and well-kept, like the rest of the place. Taehyung pats the marble counter by the sink and you bite your tongue against the urge to tell him you aren’t a dog. You don’t move though, instead watching him as he lays your jacket across a brass bar on the wall and then digs around in a cabinet for a minute or two. When he straightens up, he’s got a somewhat dusty off-white box in his hands, and he frowns. 

“Up,” He says. “I need to look at your ankle.” 

You don’t move, but you can tell he doesn’t miss the twitch of your nose at the thought of being commanded like an animal. Like someone who can’t understand. Like-

He sighs. 

“Please, will you sit on the counter, so I can look at your ankle?” You huff, but you do as he says. 

He doesn’t speak as he works, completely silent except for the odd command - “Roll it for me...alright, now flex that...deep breath...stop fidgeting or I’ll only make it worse…” - and the occasional hum under his breath. It seems to be second nature, like he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it, and it endears you more than you’d like. His touch is gentle but firm as he lightly squeezes your ankle and wraps it, lifts your pant leg to rub some kind of cream into a somewhat worrisome golden bruise forming on your calf, darts under your shirt to quickly and painlessly set your ribs before wrapping those as well. He doesn’t say anything at all until he’s almost finished with the cuts on your hands, golden ichor long gone and wounds already on their way to healing thanks to some sort of mist he spritzes on them. 

It only stings once, as he’s spraying something over some kind of cut on your thigh where Kratos ripped through the denim there without you noticing. You can’t stop the hiss as the pain hits, though you regret it when he glances up at you. 

“Sorry,” He mumbles under his breath as he dabs lightly at it with his long fingers. 

“It’s fine,” You tell him. “I’m used to it.” Your voice is rough, always, but softer than usual. You don’t know why. You can’t decide if you like it.

The entire time he works, you wait. For him to tell you it wasn’t necessary, that he can fight his own battles, that he’s not surprised a brute like yourself got into a fight, that you’re no more than what the rumours say you are. You’ve got a million different curses and insults ready to spit back at him when he finally speaks.

“Thank you,” is what comes. It shocks the words out of your mouth, and you actually look up from where you’ve been watching him methodically wipe gold away from a scrape on your forearm. His gaze is concentrated on the injury and his lips are pursed and you wish you could figure him out. 

He must take your silence for the confusion it is, because he continues. 

“I mean it,” He says. “I’m usually not someone that lets other people fight for me, but we both know that I couldn’t have taken Kratos. He’s too strong, and he was counting on that. Until you showed up.” You don’t respond. “Is there a reason you left before my set was done? Or why you were sitting in an alley beside what is possibly the most gnarled dumpster I’ve ever seen?”

You don’t answer him, instead focusing on the way his hands feel as they tilt your chin so he can look at the cuts and bruises and scrapes that decorate your face. You focus your gaze just past his shoulder, content to memorize the pattern of his gaudy vintage bathroom wallpaper, and he doesn't press for more. The distracted humming picks up again every time he stops talking, and eases the storm of guilt shame rage pain hurt grief loneliness in your chest. 

"I fight," you eventually say. Your voice is too loud in the quiet of the bathroom, shatters the silence like a sledgehammer, and you hate the way it trembles. Still, Taehyung doesn't look away from where he's carefully wiping gold from your skin, just cocks a brow, and it's as if a dam breaks in your throat. "Like, real fights. Actual competition, with rules and shit, and...sometimes the bad ones, because they tend to fight differently, it's a different kind of fight, y'know, and it's never really fair, because I'm...I'm me, but I hold back, just for fun, y'know, and it's, uh. It's alright usually, I go in, do my thing, I win, I go drink, and it all gets, I dunno, easier, maybe, for a while, like I can think right, but, um.”

You hesitate for a split second and force yourself to focus on the way the alcohol-soaked cotton tickles the cut on your head. 

“Sometimes it's not...sometimes I can't control it as well, the anger, and I kind of just lose it on people, and a while ago this guy, he almost needed his jaw wired shut, but he was kind of a prick anyway, I guess, so whatever, but, uh, today, I...there was this girl and she was doing really well, actually, y'know, managed to get me down to the mat, which is rare and pretty impressive, and I'm pretty proud of her for it now, but then, I just. I just kinda lost it, like, I just kept swinging, I couldn't stop, and then I just...I broke her leg, for no real reason, just because I wanted her to hurt, and I don't...I'm not sure why I even did it, because I'd already won, right, like what was the point of doing any more, it wasn't even helping at that point, y'know, it's not like the buzz kept up any longer because I broke this kid's leg, and I love the fights, they help clear my head for a second, but I never wanted to actually-"

You words stop short, like there are too many of them to say in too short a time, and it's then you realize Taehyung's hands are in his lap and he's looking at you fully. His expression isn't neutral anymore, it's not the carefully crafted mask of a performer, it's real and open and genuine and all you see there is pain . For you. Pain and understanding and compassion you never expected to find anywhere but the deepest corners of your soul. Looking at him looking at you like that makes you feel like you can breathe again.

"You never wanted to hurt anyone." His voice is rough, like maybe there's emotion clogging his throat as well, and you aren't sure what that does to you, but something in you jumps at the thought.

Tears mar your vision as you nod and you curse under your breath before wiping them away. He catches your quivering hand in his and just holds it for a second. His eyes don't leave yours and there are a thousand things you expect him to say but what he says is: 

"I believe you."

And that...it's more than you can take, and you break, right there on his bathroom counter, sobbing into his chest while he just rubs your back and hums and you remember the face of every person you've ever hurt and the look in their eyes as you left some of them for dead. 

You wake up the next morning curled up on the most comfortable chaise lounge in human history, sitting up and shoving the blanket off of you in a rush before you remember where you are, why you're there. A glance around tells you that you aren't alone; there's two guys bent over a table that you think might also be a tablet, conversing quietly and pointing every so often at whatever they're looking at, a girl balanced along the edge of the staircase holding a lyre - which, wow, you haven't seen a lyre in that good condition in a while - and strumming lightly along it before she frowns and shakes her head and restarts whatever melody she's playing, and the same guy sprawled over the couch with a blanket strewn haphazardly over him while he watches a different dance video on the flatscreen. He's the closest and you don't really want to talk to any of these people but you think you might have to because you aren't really sure how Taehyung got you here last night but you know it was quite a drive. You'd just mist over to the bar if you really wanted to, but your ribs hurt like a bitch still thanks to that fucker Kratos. Anything as intense as misting is out of the question for the time being.

The man on the chaise spares you a glance that feels longer than it should, full of a judgement you have no doubt you deserve and yet somehow fires your anger anyway. 

He rolls his eyes before you even say anything and waves a hand towards the kitchen. You snap your mouth closed and shoot him an irritated look, but you storm in that direction anyway. Healing is exhausting, and you want nothing more than some meat to tear into and a cold beer. 

When you get into the kitchen, however, Taehyung is standing there already, as if he’s been expecting you any minute. There’s a plate in front of him, full of food you barely recognize, and he slides it towards you. 

“Eat,” He says. You grit your teeth, unmoving, and he sighs again. “Please sit, and eat. You need the strength to heal properly.” 

You resist for a split second, but there’s a softness to him now. Something you can’t exactly put your finger on, but that you know is different , somehow, and it changes things. It makes you want to listen, to do as he asks, because he is asking . He’s not telling, he’s treating you like an animal. 

It’s a request, not a demand, and that makes all the difference. 

Taehyung is quiet while you eat. He doesn’t look at you, doesn’t watch to make sure you’re doing it, but you have no doubt he’s keeping an eye on you. It’s quiet, but not unbearably so; the air is broken by the sounds of the lyre and the television, as well as the soft chattering of the men at the table. It makes it comfortable, makes it soft in a way you’re unaccustomed to being, like the way people talk about lazy Sunday mornings or that voice they get when they see a cute animal.

It feels like home should be, instead of what yours is. 

“So why’s Pretty Boy giving me the death glare?” You eventually ask past a mouthful of food. Taehyung barely looks up, just glancing past you to the guy laying on the couch. You can feel his eyes boring into your spine, but it’s nothing new. 

“Taemin’s just protective,” Taehyung says softly. “Especially considering the stories.”

“The ones about me, you mean.”

A myriad of emotions passes through his eyes when he nods, and you wish you could more easily decipher them. Maybe in time, you will. 

Maybe.

“Those, yes,” He says softly. “But he’ll learn.” He doesn’t say it, but nonetheless, you hear the words as clear as day. Just like I did.  

Someone hums behind you and you glance over to see a woman - the strawberry thief - making her way into the kitchen. She gives Taehyung a look you don’t care enough to figure out, and they have an entire conversation in the span of five minutes. Something about it irks you, and it only gets worse when they start moving around each other, Taehyung handing her things without her asking. 

It’s ridiculous, and you know it, but the air gets heavy in your lungs and your head starts to swim and suddenly you’re suffocating. It’s too much, there’s too much here, and you can’t take it anymore. 

The force with which you shove away the counter would have slammed it into the wall were it not already attached. There are slight cracks in the granite tops, though, and there’s just enough clarity as Taehyung calls your name for you to feel guilty about it. It’s not enough to stop you though; you have to get out, you need to get out, before you do something worse, and the cracks in the granite are proof of that. 

You’re out the door in an instant, your form coalescing painfully back into solid matter as you reach the hallway. Your ribs ache, screaming with the effort of trying to mist away from this place, this home , and you lean against the wall in the hope that it will help steady you. 

The door opens behind you, the creak of the old hinges deafening in the silence of the hall. There’s a commotion behind it, voices overlapping each other and reverberating in your skull until they’re a twisted mockery of your siblings. 

You stumble down the hall, one hand clutching your ribs to keep them as still as possible despite your movement. It’s not lost on you that there are footsteps following you, but you can’t focus on them now. You’re not moving fast, and you need to be, you should be running , but you can’t. Your vision is already clouding slightly at the edges, the sudden spike of adrenaline waning now that you’re out of the apartment. 

Someone says your name and you swing. 

It’s instinct, the way your fist flies through the air; you can’t control it, not this, not when the red is all you can see even as it seeps away and turns lilac. It doesn’t matter anyway. You don’t make contact with anything but the wall, plaster crumbling around your fist and onto the carpeted floor. 

“That was rude,” Taehyung says softly. He doesn’t sound mad, though he should, considering you almost decked him straight in the nose. “I’ll take you back.”

He drapes your jacket over your arm and walks away, toward emergency stairs tucked into the corner instead of the elevator, and you follow. He hums as he goes, and he lets you lead the way down the stairs, keeping pace with your quick steps until both of you step out a side door into an alleyway. 

Out of habit, more than anything, you light a cigarette and put it between your lips. You don’t miss the disgusted scrunch of Taehyung’s nose, but you do ignore it. The smoke is familiar in lungs, comforting, and he doesn’t understand it, won’t ever understand it, but he doesn’t have to. 

“Sorry, Tae,” You say after a few minutes of silence. Taehyung shrugs one shoulder and moves to lean beside you against the stone of the building. 

“Are you okay now?” You nod, taking a deep breath, remembering how Hestia had taught you, so long ago, how her hand felt against your chest, the warmth and love it held. “Then you’re forgiven. And you can call me Calliope, if you want.”

You’re both quiet after that. He doesn’t make fun of you, he doesn’t judge you, he just silently drives you back to Suho’s bar, which is when you remember that he doesn’t know where you live. You’re fine with it; you don’t want to see him in your run down hovel. It’s not much, especially compared to his own apartment, but that makes sense, too. 

What could ever live up to the home of a Muse? Not even a muse, really. The Muse. The Head of the Nine Muses, the one called on most often by those in need, the one that everyone knew, the one that Hephaestus just put statues of in the gardens of Olympus, according to the rumors that Apollo sent you. 

The calm that he brings lasts until you get back to your apartment, nearly ten full minutes after you disappear into the alley beside Suho’s bar. It’s the longest the calm has ever lasted, and the view of the city tinted lavender is one you think you love. 

If you can love. 

Things get clearer, somehow. The weight on your shoulders lessens, makes you feel less like Atlas and more like you, how you were all those years ago in the now-ancient days when things made sense. When people fought for honor and glory and justice more than they fought for oil and death and greed. 

It could be because open mic nights are frequent around the city, and you’re able to figure out his schedule pretty well. You don’t go every night that he sings, just when it gets to be too much, when the scarlet haze starts to bleed into your irises like a flag in front of a bull. It helps, for a while, lets you settle long enough to pull the pieces of you back into a shape that vaguely resembles yourself. 

It could be because the fights happen every night, and Taehyung is no stranger to where to look to find them. He watches every one that he can, when he isn’t singing, and his presence anchors you. Focuses you, so that you can pull your punches just enough, so that there’s less hurting and more fighting. It doesn’t work every time, you still lose yourself in the rage and do more damage than you ever mean to, but it helps enough. And when it doesn’t, he’s there, to slide a hand across your shoulders in that exact same way that Hestia used to, that Apollo might if you let him close enough to know you’re alive, that Artemis would , were she anywhere but where she is. 

It’s a strange feeling. You’re not used to companionship, you don’t know how to have friends. You still say the wrong things and do the wrong things and he still speaks to you like he expects to be listened to, but you both are learning. You apologize more often, and he corrects himself quicker. It’s a slow, fragile thing, this friendship, but it’s there. 

Until the night when it’s not. 

You aren’t sure how it happens. It’s been weeks since you last saw Taehyung; he mentioned some project he was working on, something or another that would have most of his attention along with that of several of the other Muses. You had brushed it off when he said it, some snide remark about how you don’t need him there to win. 

You would take it back if you could. 

Because you were right, of course, you don’t need him there to win; you can do that on your own. And your control has gotten better, stronger, over the last few months, but complacency is what always leads to disaster. 

The guy deserved it, is what you tell yourself as you’re pulled out of the ring. He was a piece of shit anyway, you remind yourself as you call Apollo with shaking hands. He didn’t deserve your mercy, you tell the golden gold after you’ve begged him to help save the man’s life. Artemis would have done the same, you insist to him, long after he’s hung up the phone and left to follow the ambulance to the hospital. 

You don’t go to Suho’s. You can’t bear it, not when he might be there, not when he would read it on your face in a heartbeat. You don’t want to watch the disappointment crumble into something more familiar, something worse, you can’t watch him look at you with the knowledge that your siblings are right, that they’ve always been right, that you’re nothing better than a crazed animal. 

The club is packed full when you get there. The bartender starts to pour you a drink and you just take the bottle, leaving a too-thick wad of bills in return. The bourbon tickles as it goes down but it warms your stomach and distracts you from the haze in your mind, the repetitive beat of they were right they were right they were right they were-

“Whoops, sorry,” someone says, a second before they knock into your shoulder. You’ve been around long enough to know a fake fall, and you scowl as you glance towards them. 

He’s cute. Taller than you, with skin that would hide the marks you so love to create, and hair that looks like it would be soft in your hands. His clothes fit well, and they look like they were chosen for comfort over style despite the way he walks like a model in them, which you always find attractive. 

The smile that slips onto your face is familiar, as is the way you bring your hand up to rest on his hip in an effort to steady him. 

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart,” You tell him, not being subtle in the way you eye him. He looks soft; you love them soft. “You headed to get a drink?”

“I might be,” He says teasingly, a coy grin forming on his lips. 

“I’ve got something better, if you’re interested.”

His eyes roam along your body, his breath drawing somewhat quicker when he notices the scrapes on your knuckles. “I might be.”

It takes five minutes to get him to a corner quiet enough to talk. Less than three to get your lips on his. One and a half to start sucking a mark into his neck that makes him moan so pretty you can’t help but want to hear it again. 

One of your hands is up his shirt, playing with the pebbled buds and the metal pierced through them, while the other teasingly massages the skin of his hip when he’s torn away from you roughly. 

“What the fuck?” Your voice growls as you look up. The guy is standing there, looking for all the world like he’s ready to run, but he isn’t watching you. 

No, his eyes are on a familiar sight; Taehyung, his hair now a pretty lavender that makes you think of a home you don’t have, even as he doesn’t look at you. 

“Taken,” He growls, releasing the collar of the guy you had every intent to make cry with pleasure. The guy scurries off before you can stop him, though, and you don’t bother to hide your disdain. 

“What the fuck is your problem?” You demand, already lighting a cigarette as you head outside. Taehyung follows, pulling it from between your lips and crushing it in his hands before you have the chance to get your lighter out.

“Me? You looked like you were about to eat him .” He follows you all the way to the street outside and down the sidewalk, pulling each cigarette out of your hands before you can light it. He waits until you’re a decent distance from the crowd outside the club before he stops you, one hand lightly encircling your wrist. 

Your boots scuff against the ground as you stop, not turning to look at him. You’re too afraid to, too worried he’ll see it all on your face and just know that you’ve fucked up, maybe beyond repair. 

“Apollo called me,” is what he says instead. “Said I might want to find you tonight.”

You should’ve known. That little fuck, of course he would rat you out. 

“I didn’t-” 

The words choke in your throat. You want to say you don’t need him. You don’t need him to come running like you’re some scared little girl who can’t control her strength, you don’t need him to piece you back together because you aren’t broken, you don’t need him because you don’t need anyone, you never have. 

“I know you didn’t,” Taehyung says quietly. “I know he deserved it, I know what he did, and I know you didn’t mean to.”

Something inside of you breaks and you find yourself shaking. 

“He hurt her , Tae, I heard it, I heard her telling her friend about it on the phone, I saw her crying, I saw her clothes, okay, he-”

“I know,” Taehyung says, pulling you into a loose hug. “I know you did, it’s okay. He’s going to be okay. He’s not gonna escape his punishment from that, you didn’t send anyone to Hades today. It’s okay.”

The cloud struggles, for what feels like hours. Guilt settles like lead in your stomach, and you wish you weren’t so used to the feeling. The rage returns every time you remember what that girl looked like, what she sounded like on the phone, how you felt when you realized it was your competitor who had done that to her. 

There’s no honor in that. There’s no justice, no glory, in beating an opponent who was never aware they were in the ring, and it makes your blood boil all over again. Taehyung’s voice soothes you, slightly, makes the edges of your vision turn indigo, but it isn’t enough. 

It’s never enough. 

“I have to go,” You say, pulling yourself away from him. “I need- I have to find-”

“A distraction,” He finishes for you, too aware that you can’t find the words you need. “Some mortal that you can bruise and break and bang until you feel less like a monster?”

That’s exactly what you want to do, what you had been about to do with that guy at the club, and it’s only Taehyung’s voice calling your name in that soft, sweet way of his that makes you wonder if that’s not a good plan. 

“I’ll be a distraction, if you need one.” You whip your head around, staring at him, but he doesn’t flinch. “I’m sturdier than the mortals, I can take more. Let me be your distraction.”

“I…” You hesitate. You don’t know why. You shouldn’t even be entertaining this idea, it’s not a good one, but then...when have any of your ideas been good? “I can’t fuck in a house with eight other people.”

“You have an apartment,” He says easily. “Let’s go there.”

It’s a bad idea. You don’t do that, you don’t fuck people at your apartment, you don’t have people in your apartment, it’s your space. It’s a bad idea, it can only end in disaster. 

“Okay.”

Taehyung’s lips are soft against yours, yielding and pliant just the way you’re used to. His hands are big and warm against your ass, even through your jeans, and the feeling gives you the courage to slide your own under the ridiculously patterned button-down he’s wearing. 

He lets you lead the way through the door, kicking it closed behind you with slightly too much force. Your apartment is small, a studio with a bed tucked in the corner for the rare times that you need it. 

You push Taehyung onto it and slide yourself onto his lap, already grinding down onto the hard length you can feel there. He's not quite as enthusiastic, but his fingers are like steel against you, pulling you down with every rut of your hips. 

This, you can do. This, you're familiar with. 

You push on his shoulders, doing your best to get him on his back so you can have better access to the clasp of his jeans, but he resists. You try again, firmer, using a harsh suck against his skin as a distraction, but he still doesn't go. 

Frustrated, you pull back. 

"Not like this," He says. His voice clears some of the fog, and you frown. 

"Do you want to be on top, then? Because I don't mind, I just need it," You tell him. He sighs a little, but he flips the two of you over so he's kneeling between your open legs and your back is cushioned against the mattress. 

"How long has it been since you spent the night with someone who knows who you are?" He asks, pressing a kiss to your cheek as he sits back on his knees. 

You shift, uncomfortable. "A while. Why does that matter? Just fuck me."

"No," Taehyung says, voice gentle but firm. You cock a brow at him and move to get out from under him, but he stills you with a hand on your thigh. 

"You are a goddess," He tells you, trailing his hands down so he can undo the laces on your steel-toe boots and slide them off. "You have held Victory in your palms and set her free." 

His palms burn through the denim on your thighs, but you welcome it as he slides your jacket over your shoulders to the bed beneath. 

"You are the winner of wars. You are the one who grants battlefield wishes. You are the dead's escort to Hades." He leans down, pressing a soft kiss against your cheek and then down your throat. 

He pulls back as he gets to your collarbone, eyes blown wide with unfamiliar desire, and it makes your breath catch in your throat.

"You," Taehyung tells you, with desire in his eyes and belief in his voice, "Deserve to be treated like the goddess that you are, with the respect you have earned, and the care you deserve." 

As often as you fuck people, it's been a very long time since anyone wanted to fuck you for any reason beyond your appearance and the personality you show them. But this? This look in the muse's eyes as his hands settle on your knees as he waits? 

Taehyung wants to fuck you because you're you. Not despite it, not because he doesn't know . He has seen you at your worst and yet he keeps coming back, keeps showing up as you fall apart. Each time he stays, hands you a basket so you can pick the pieces of yourself up off the ground, holds the tape so you can mash it back together, and is ready to help steady you when you start to crumble again. 

He's here for you , to treat you in a way no one has ever treated you before. He's your friend.

He cares.

You nod, however tentatively, and his lips are on yours in an instant. They're firmer now, less pliable and more controlling, but you don't mind. Not this time. 

Not with Taehyung. 

His hands don't hesitate as he strips you both of your clothes, but you can feel it each time he checks to make sure you're okay. The way that he watches your expression, the tense of your muscles under him, the cadence of your gasps for air between kisses, he reads all of it as clear as if it's a book in front of him. He slows down before you can stop him, his lips drawing back from the kisses he draws across your thighs, and he speeds up as your thoughts start to drift, swiping his tongue and two fingers through your folds to tease and bring your attention back to him. 

His fingers bury themselves in your heat, crooking slightly to brush against that soft part of you that makes the world spin, and it's all too intense. His lips are hardly even touching your skin, just pressing gentle kisses against the skin of your thigh, a gentle complement to the way he glides his fingers in and out of you, slow and steady and delicious, but it's absolutely intoxicating. 

He's talkative, too; he gives you constant praise. He tells you how well you take his fingers, how good you look with his fingers inside you, how absolutely fantastic you taste on his tongue, how he'd live between your thighs if he could. 

It's too much, and you can't be sure why, not when your orgasm is approaching quicker than it ever has, not when your walls clench around him and you soak your sheets, not when he's cleaning your cum off his fingers with his tongue.

"Good," He purrs. "Now you're all warmed up." 

His mouth hits your heat without hesitation or warning, before the aftershocks are even finished, and your hips buck upwards. His arms slide underneath your thighs only to grip them and bring them back down. You can't move much in his grip except to grind your pussy against his mouth, which he seems to enjoy, if the muffled grunts that escape him are any indication.

He doesn't stop until his tongue is buried inside you with one finger drawing lazy circles on your clit and you're cumming again, hands gripping the soft strands of his hair so tight that you would be afraid of pulling it out if you could focus on anything besides the feel of him against you.

He lets you ride the aftershock, this time. Waits until your pants die down slightly, until you're back in your mind. 

"Good?" He asks you. His voice is deeper, rumbles instead of slides, but it breaks through the post-orgasm haze long enough for you to nod. “More?”

“More,” you agree, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders and pulling him into a heated kiss. You haven’t been this clear-headed in a while. Every sensation is clear and crisp, every sound heightened, everything is simultaneously more while also being exactly what it’s always supposed to have been. 

Taehyung’s cock is everything you could have expected from a muse; thick, long, beautiful, and it fills you in a way that’s indescribable as he slides inside. He groans at the feeling, deep and throaty and beautiful, and begins his thrusts nearly immediately. 

It’s as slow as he was with his fingers; steady and forceful, but unhurried. As if he wants to take his time. As if he wants to savor it. Savor you . 

“Do you have any idea how amazing you are?” He mutters, almost as an afterthought. “What you look like right now, what you look like when you’re fighting, when you’ve won and you’re triumphant? It’s fucking addictive, seeing that confidence in you.”

“Shit, Tae, don’t stop-”

“It’s so fucking intoxicating,” He groans, pace quickening. Your arms wrap around him more fully, nails like claws down his back as you arch your back to get him deeper. “You get this look in your eyes, like you can do anything you fucking want to, and it’s so fucking brilliant, because you can , you can do anything and everything you ever fucking want to do, and no one can stop you.”

A whine you’ll never admit to escapes your throat, and Taehyung drives his cock further into you. 

“Let go, my sweet,” Taehyung purrs in your ear. “Let yourself relax, just this once. For me.”

His hand touches your clit and it’s so much, too much , you’re feeling everything so intensely that it takes a solid minute to realize you’re coming down from an orgasm. Taehyung has stilled inside you, unmoving but groaning as you flutter around him, and you push weakly at his shoulder. 

He slides himself out of you, looking entirely too proud of wet spot underneath you and glistening against his lower stomach. You wobble your way up to rest your elbows underneath you, and it’s like he can sense your words before they come. 

“No,” He says simply. “I don’t you to get me off with your mouth.”

“A hand then? I don’t want you to leave unsatisfied.” 

A frown pulls at the corner of his mouth, and he leans down just enough that your lips are almost touching, a not-there kiss that you can only wish for. 

“In what world is fucking you to the point of Elysium unsatisfying?”

The crowd around you is deafening; some of them are cheering for you, but the majority are rooting for your downfall. Such is the life of a challenging the champion, you suppose. 

You don’t know how Taehyung found this place; maybe Artemis had heard rumors, or maybe he searched for it himself. You can’t bring yourself to care, not when you’ve got someone worth fighting on the other side of the arena. 

The sand crunches beneath your feet. It’s hot, hotter than it should be since you’re still wearing your signature jeans and boots - without the jacket this time. You learned from that mistake. 

Your vision tints pink as you size up your opponent; he’s massive, not one to be easily defeated, and you relish the challenge. It’s been so long since you’ve fought a giant. Excitement thrums under your veins as he turns to you. He scoffs. 

If you had a little less control, you might be flying across the arena already. He clearly has no idea who’s standing across from him. Probably thinks you’re some demigod, come to challenge him for the fleece he isn’t supposed to have. 

He’ll learn. 

Something moves in the distance. It should blend in, considering how dark it is, but instead it draws your eye, and you don’t even question why. You would recognize him anywhere, have recognized him everywhere, and his presence calms you. Makes you remember a few nights ago, falling into bed in a hotel in Rome because the burn was to much and you needed him to help you release it. 

“Try not to be too quick, princess,” The giant across from you huffs. You cock a brow and send a look to your muse, who just rolls his eyes, despite the smile playing across his face. 

Violet rings your vision as you ready your stance. The announcer yells something that’s lost over the noise of the crowd. Taehyung leans forward, elbows on his knees, excitement and pride in his eyes. 

The giant swings. 

[kutemouse]

Caught (Prologue)

Disclaimers: All “Save Me” webtoon and BTS MV/highlight reel/film references and plots belong to BTS and BigHit. Not sure who edited it or made it, but the “I’m Fine/Save Me” ambigram pic I used came from here. All pictures of Kim Taehyung belong to BTS and BigHit, I just edited them for my header. The picture of BTS came from Vogue Japan, I just edited it for my header. I got the Kim Taehyung Wings Film Gif from DannyBriz on Wattpad.

A Note from Kutemouse: Awwww, thank you for reading my stuff, @chocolatewolfuniversitytrash!

So, this sweet little mini series is inspired by several things… The movie 365 DNI, the Save Me webtoon, the BTS MV universe, and ideas I’ve come up with waaaaaay too late at night 😂 Honestly, I’m OBSESSED with the whole MV/highlight reel/wings films arc that started with The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1, and I’ve ALWAYS wanted to write a story inspired by it. So, kutie pie @chocolatewolfuniversitytrash, thank you for allowing this dream to come to light.

About the non-con request, I was all like, “EEEERRRRRRMMMMMMMM idk,” because I’ve never written non-con and therefore don’t… know… if I’m comfortable with it…? I will attempt to do my best. Either way, I hope you like what has come out of my brain 😅

Also, thank you to @btssmutheaven for revealing my drafts (NOT REALLY, ILY) to @taemaknae for reading my shit and loving it, and to @kpopyandere for being the best unnie account and helping me realize I can write all the yandere ideas I want.

Age Recommendation: 21+ (this is NOT one for youngsters, kuties, and is MOST DEFINITELY NSFW)

Genre: Mafia!AU w/ BTS, Jailbird!AU w/ Taehyung, Yandere!BTS

Warnings: ALL THE WARNINGS. Just kidding, uh… Swears. There are minors in this section but they do NOT do anything sexual. I ain’t about that kinda life, y’all. F*ckboy Taehyung. Fluffy friendship. Angsty jealousy. Mentions of drug use and alcohol consumption (NOT by minors tho). Yandere themes including unhealthy obsession and possessiveness. Making out. No smut in this part, but it’s heavy af.

🚨TRIGGER WARNING. DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE ISSUES WITH THE FOLLOWING.🚨

Mentions of abusive relationships, mentions of a parent abusing their child, mentions of sexual abuse, mentions of schoolyard bullying, mentions of a violent murder.

These are not fleshed out or detailed scenarios. When I say “mention,” I mean briefly discussed after it happened, not during, and definitely not in any detail whatsoever. You DO NOT have to read my work. You decide what you are comfortable with. All I want is for you kuties to be happy.

Word Count: 6.1k (WTF is this even allowed?!)

Summary: Kim Taehyung was the absolute love of your life… until he became a murderer. With him serving a life sentence in prison, you were finally free to live out the rest of your life however you wanted. Just when you thought you were at the top of your game, ready to take on the world, Taehyung reappears like a monster not even your worst nightmares could dream up. He gives you a year to fall in love with him, but now the question is, can monsters even be loved?

Master List

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Caught (Taehyung Series, Yandere, Smut, Angst) Prologue

I remember the first time I saw Kim Taehyung. We were both fifteen, just starting out in high school. Back then, I remember the way he lazily leaned against a locker with his arms crossed, seemingly waiting for someone. His hair was bleached a ridiculous bright blonde on the top and left brunette everywhere else. He had on dramatic, black eyeliner that served to accentuate his inky eyes, and he wore a studded leather jacket with his shirt and tie rather than the traditional uniform. Intrigued, I opened my locker and picked out my books for my next class, watching him out of the corner of my eye.

I saw him zero in on his target and take brisk, wide strides towards her as she twirled the combo to her locker. She looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes as he caged her in by leaning down to whisper something in her ear. Suddenly, the hallway was filled with flirtatious giggles and I turned away, rolling my eyes. So he was one of those assholes.

I watched him do this with every single girl in our class. I swear, he had his routine down to a science. Chat her up, openly flirt, flirt some more until she caved in to whatever he desired, then drop her like a hot frying pan. It took a couple months for his interest to finally land on me.

“Hey.”

I didn’t bother to look up as I twirled the combination to my locker and popped it open.

“Hey,” he said louder.

I flicked a glance his way. “Do you need something?”

His eyes narrowed. “Do I look like I need anything?”

I huffed out a sigh. “What do you want, Kim Taehyung?”

He let out a snort, leaning against the locker next to mine the same way he’d done a thousand times with a thousand other girls. “So you know my name, but I don’t know yours. You’re new, right?”

“I transferred in at the beginning of the year,” I said impatiently. “And we’re in the same class, so you should know who I am.”

Taehyung’s lips curled up into a playful smirk. “Really? No, that can’t be right. I definitely would’ve remembered you.”

I rolled my eyes and slammed my locker shut, walking quickly away. Taehyung jogged to keep up. “Just tell me your name,” he insisted.

“Why?”

“C’mon, I’m just trying to make friends.”

I whirled around, stopping both of us in our tracks. “Friends? Is that what you’ve been doing with every other girl here? Just making friends?”

Taehyung smirked once more and took a step towards me. I don’t know why, but I took a step back. I should’ve held my ground, should’ve told him to fuck off right then and there. Instead, I let him back me up against the wall and entrap me within his darkened gaze, the same way he would for the next three years of our lives.

He leaned down to whisper in my ear, his breath tickling the skin of my cheek. “We can be more than friends… but first, you have to tell me your name.”

I shoved him off me and practically sprinted down the hall, cheeks aflame with embarrassment. My peers and classmates who saw the exchange teased me for weeks afterward, no matter how much I kept my head down and avoided Taehyung like my life depended on it. It wasn’t until I heard him telling off some of the more tenacious gossipers I decided to give him another chance.

I tapped him on his shoulder as he stood in front of his locker. His eyes widened when he turned to see me standing there. “I’m L/n Y/n,” I said meekly. “And I wanted to thank you for what you said to those people.”

“You heard that?” he asked, the skin of his neck flushing pink.

I nodded.

“You’re welcome,” he said, tossing me a boxy grin.

That day, a seed was planted that eventually grew into a steady, beautiful friendship. A year later, I had come out of my shell quite a bit thanks to Taehyung, and I had a solid group of mates that I adored and relied on. Tae was my best friend, and I was his. Of course, we still got teased quite a bit about being a couple, but I figured we were both long past that.

Taehyung matured alongside our friendship. He stopped wearing thick eyeliner and sporting ridiculous hair colors, instead opting for a softer, more natural look with caramel brown locks and the unblemished glow of his slightly-tan skin. Gone were his dramatic, attention-seeking ways. His voice also deepened, dropping almost an entire octave. Yet despite all of his changes, he still stayed an absolute fuck-boy, shagging a new girl every other week. I came to realize it was all part of his personality, though, and I loved him no matter what.

The summer before our senior year was when I realized that love ran way deeper than friendship. We were at my best girlfriend Chaeyoung’s house when Taehyung stumbled in with yet another girl, his hair freshly dyed a bright cerulean blue. “Hey everyone!” he called out, slinging his arm around the girl’s shoulders. My smile faded as I looked over and noticed she was beyond gorgeous, with waist-length black locks that seemed to flow down the perfect curve of her back. I shuddered as a green monster reared its ugly head deep within me.

Taehyung was with that girl for a few months, which by his standards, was practically a lifetime. The entire time they were together, I felt like I was standing on the edge of a cliff about to swan-dive into devastating heartbreak. Each time I saw him kiss her, each time I saw him smile at her, each time I saw him lean over and whisper something in her ear, a piece of my soul shriveled up and died. I did my best to put my feelings aside, knowing I already had my chance and he would probably never look at me that way again. Even after they broke up, I kept my love for him tamped down and tucked away deep in the recesses of my heart, scared of ruining our friendship.

His break-up only served to draw us closer together, and slowly, without me realizing it, our friendship began to bloom into something more. Taehyung and I started to tell each other everything, including the messed-up secrets our home lives made us keep. One day, we were sitting in an empty classroom after school. I was trying to study, but kept getting distracted by Tae staring longingly out the window. “What’re you looking at?” I finally asked, putting my pencil down.

“Nothing,” he said simply. “Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“About when we’ll finally get out of here.”

I smiled, my heart thumping a little faster. “We?”

He turned and tossed me his signature boxy grin. “Yeah. We. We’ll make it out of here someday, Y/n. I’ll get away from my bastard of a dad, you’ll get away from your selfish mother, and we’ll have a house in the country with big, open fields and plenty of space to finally fucking breathe.”

I smiled and stored those words away, using them to comfort myself whenever my mother and her asshole of a boyfriend wouldn’t stop yelling at each other, or worse, when they’d pass out on the couch, too drunk or high to stay coherent.

One night around three in the morning, my phone began to buzz and didn’t stop until I finally popped an eye open, fumbled around for it in the dark, and pressed it to my ear. “Hello?” I mumbled.

“H-Hey.”

I sat up. “Taehyung?”

“Y/n, I n-need your help,” he said shakily. It sounded like he was… crying?

I immediately got out of bed and pulled some jeans on. “Tae, it’s okay,” I said soothingly, trying to hide the panic I was feeling. I knew Taehyung’s home life was extremely hard. In fact, most of our home lives were terrible. The only two in our friend group who even came close to “privileged” were Chaeyoung and Jin, and that was because their parents had more money, not less problems.

I myself had plenty of issues. The reason my mother and I moved here when I was fifteen was to escape her abusive boyfriend, and even then, we still lived in constant fear of him finding us again. I guess that fear drove her into the arms of the first strong-looking man who looked twice at her, because her new boyfriend, Manseok, seemed to fit the same abusive pattern. At least he didn’t hit her when he was sober.

I wasn’t exactly sure how terrible Taehyung’s life was until the night he called me. At his request, I stole a few bills from my mom’s purse as well as her ID and put us up in a cheap motel room for the night. Jumping up when I finally heard his knock, I quickly pulled the door open to reveal Taehyung, his blue hair stringy from the rain outside. He was panting like he ran all the way there. I covered my mouth with my hands as the dim lighting revealed his left eye swollen shut, covered in nasty shades of scarlet and purple. His lip was split and bleeding, and his right cheek had another bruise and cut creeping down to his jawbone. The worst part, though, were the red finger-shaped marks that covered his neck.

“Y/n,” he croaked out. I held open my arms and he fell into them, not leaving their safety until well into the morning. I iced his black eye and bruises as much as I could, and bandaged the cuts that covered his face. Taehyung’s face was pressed into my chest, his breathing deep and even as he finally slept.

I decided then and there I’d never let him go.

Thankfully, Taehyung felt the same way. Within a week, he brushed off every other girl he was chatting up and focused all of his attention on me. We spent hours with each other after school, either in person or on the phone, and it became a common occurrence for him to intertwine his fingers with mine or peck me sweetly on the cheek.

I quickly grew dissatisfied, sick of the friendship barrier preventing us from taking things further. We spent an entire day together one weekend, talking, laughing, walking the streets, and trying different foods from vendor carts. As the sun started to go down, Taehyung wrapped his arms around me from behind, pressing his chest into my back. He was teasing me, I forget about what, and he leaned down to kiss my cheek when I turned at the last second and let him peck my lips instead. I laughed as his dark eyes grew wide with shock.

That was all it took, though. One kiss, and he was mine. Or rather, I was his. Afterwards, he pulled me into a deserted alleyway and we kissed until the sun completely disappeared. As the stars appeared in the sky above, Taehyung asked me to be his girlfriend, murmuring in my ear about how much he loved me and how he had never stopped loving me, even after I turned him down. With my heart practically bursting, I readily agreed.

Back then, Taehyung had a knack for getting in trouble, and me being his new girlfriend did nothing to hinder that side of him. He was definitely the “bad boy” of our school, constantly rebelling against the system by swapping his uniform for street clothes and ditching classes. His favorite form of rebellion, however, was street graffiti. He loved spray-painting words and drawings all over the walls of our neighborhood alongside his best friend, Namjoon. Tae was nearly caught by the cops a couple of times, but thanks to his quick instincts, he managed to give them the slip.

Still, a boy with bright, blue hair was bound to stand out, so after a couple nights of close calls, Taehyung finally dyed his hair back to that soft, caramel brown that I loved running my fingers through. We sat together at a bus stop, watching cars and people go by with fingers intertwined, when Tae stood and pulled a paint can out of his jacket pocket.

“Again?” I asked. Despite my teasing tone, I smiled up at him.

Taehyung tucked his bottom lip between his teeth with a grin as he sprayed something onto the panel beside us. “Look,” he said once he was finished, tilting his head to admire his work.

I stood up to see the words “I’m fine” sprayed in green. The font was the most interesting part, though, too curly in comparison to Taehyung’s usual writing. “Now look at it from upside-down,” Tae said.

I threw him a skeptical look before obediently curving my neck and scoping out the piece of art as best I could. “Save me,” I read out loud.

Taehyung nodded. “It’s for us,” he murmured.

I looked up at him, emotions surging through me like a waterfall surging down a cliff. “It’s beautiful,” I said, my voice cracking.

Taehyung looked at me, concern filling his features. “Baby girl, what’s wrong?”

“I-I have s-something to tell you,” I stammered.

With many tears and a shaky voice, I began to explain to Taehyung the events that had transpired only a few nights before. How my mom’s boyfriend had quietly snuck into my room while she remained passed out on the couch. How he had told me to be quiet as his hand started stroking my arm. How he had held his hand over my mouth and yelped when I bit him. How I had screamed so loud our neighbors called the cops. How he was carted away by the police with my mother shrieking the entire time about how I was a brat and a dramatic liar.

Taehyung’s gaze grew darker with each word. “That bastard,” he spat, clenching his fists. “I will end that motherfucker.”

“Taehyung, stop,” I sighed. “It’s over. For now, at least. I’ll stay at Chaeyoung’s until graduation.”

“What do you mean? He’s not going to jail?”

I hung my head. “My mom left to pay his bail an hour ago.”

Taehyung slammed his fist into the same panel he just graffitied. “So that jerk is going to walk free?!”

I stood up and ran my hands soothingly over his shoulders. “For now. I’m going to press charges, but in the end, it’s my word against his. Who knows how the system will treat him.”

Taehyung let out a feral growl, turning away from me. “I’m sick of this shit,” he snapped. “My dad, your mom’s boyfriend… neither of them should be walking free after everything they’ve done.”

Not knowing what else to do, I hugged him tightly from behind. “Just another few months,” I said quietly. “And then we’ll be out of here. A house in the country, just like you said.”

“That’s not good enough,” Tae snapped, turning back towards me. My mouth parted in surprise as I looked into his eyes and saw something there I’d never seen before. It was like a slow-burning flame, one that hadn’t yet risen into a raging wildfire, but threatened to if it wasn’t quickly put out.

Taehyung suddenly grabbed my hand and tugged me down the street. “I’m dropping you off at Chae’s,” he said. “And then I want you to stay there for the next twenty-four hours. I don’t want you going out for any reason, you understand me?”

“Taehyung, what are you saying? You’re scaring me.”

He stopped walking, turning so we were facing each other once more. The flame I saw earlier began blazing, turning rapidly into something uncontrollable and destructive I didn’t know how to stop. “This ends tonight,” he growled.

True to his word, he dropped me off at Chaeyoung’s, not leaving until he made me promise I wouldn’t go out until he said so. After a week, with Tae’s permission, I went home to get some clothes and personal items only to find my mom sitting on the couch, strung out of her mind. “Is he here?” I asked tentatively.

She raised her red-rimmed eyes to meet mine. “Who?”

“Manseok. Your jerk of a boyfriend.”

My mom shrugged and scoffed. “Haven’t seen that bastard for a couple days now,” she said, her words slurring together. “He upped and left us. Stole some money from me to do it, too.”

The feeling of relief that I felt was short-lived once I remembered that asshole would probably be back for more, just like the others. I quickly gathered my things and left, stopping only to make sure my mom had enough food for the next few days.

Ever since that night, Taehyung withdrew into himself. He still held my hand and kissed me, but it was distant, emotionless, like he didn’t know how to feel his feelings for me anymore. He weirdly became somewhat possessive of me, keeping me practically glued to his side whenever he was with me, and constantly texting me when we weren’t together. Whenever other boys looked my way, Taehyung shot them down with harsh words and incessant bullying our friends joined in on. I insisted they stop that kind of behavior, and for a while, I thought Tae and his friends complied. It wasn’t until much later in life when I realized they never truly stopped. They just got better at hiding it.

One night, I was at Namjoon’s place waiting for Tae when Joon’s phone rang. “Taehyung?” he said, turning away from me when I looked up. “Hey, calm down. You did what?!”

He stood up quickly. I motioned for him to put it on speaker, but he waved me off. “Okay, stop. I’m coming over right now. Just stay put, dammit.”

Joon grabbed his jacket and rushed towards the door. “Wait!” I cried. “What happened?!”

“Nothing that concerns you,” he snapped. “Stay here. I’ll bring Taehyung to you, alright?”

Neither of them came back. Before the sun even thought of rising, I determinedly ran all the way to Taehyung’s apartment, desperate to see him and make sure he was alright. As my sneakers pounded against the pavement and my breath started coming out in ragged gasps, I suddenly felt a hand grasp my forearm and yank me into a side alley.

“What are you doing here?” a voice growled as I yelped in surprise. I looked up to see Jungkook standing there, glaring at me.

“I want to see Taehyung,” I retorted, ripping my arm from his grasp.

He crossed his arms. “Not gonna happen.”

“Like hell it’s not!” I snapped. “Where is he?”

Jungkook grabbed the front of my jacket, preventing me from pushing past him. “Go home, Y/n.”

“Absolutely the fuck not!”

Sick of my shit, Jungkook picked me up, threw me over his broad shoulder, and carried me out of the alleyway. I kicked and screamed the entire way. He set me down once we were on the main street. “Taehyung will call you when he can,” he said firmly. “I won’t say it again, Y/n. Go home.”

“No!” Tears welled up, and I furiously swiped them away. “I’m his girlfriend! Tell me where he is right now or I’ll—”

“You’ll what?” Jungkook snapped. “Y/n, you don’t even know where he is. Fucking leave, or I’ll carry you all the way back to Chae’s myself.”

It didn’t take much longer for me to realize Jungkook wouldn’t relent. Eventually, I went back to Chaeyoung’s and spent the day staring at the wall beside my bed. What did Taehyung do? What were his friends protecting him from? When had things gotten so fucked up?

My questions were never answered. After a full week of silence, complete with him missing school, Taehyung showed up at Chae’s place asking for me. “She doesn’t want to see you,” Chae snapped, closing the door as I meandered into the entry hall.

Taehyung stopped her by slamming his palm against the wood. “Please, Chae,” he begged.

Recognizing his deep tenor, I walked up and put my hand on my bestie’s shoulder. “I’ve got this, Chae,” I murmured. She left with a huff.

Taehyung looked terrible. Dark circles ran under both eyes like he’d spent multiple nights without sleep, his hair was unkempt, and his skin was much too pale. Without another word, I immediately took him inside and dragged him up to my room. He took a shower in my en suite bathroom while I washed his clothes. After he dressed, we sat on my bed, still not speaking. “What happened?” I finally asked.

He tossed me a weak smile. “Life happened.”

I shook my head in disgust. “You leave me for an entire week with no explanation, and that’s all you have to say?”

“Baby girl, please,” Taehyung said, clasping my hands in between his large, rough ones. “I’m sorry I left you alone. I asked the guys to keep an eye on you, and they said you’ve been doing fine.”

“Fine is an overstatement,” I snorted, tearing my hands from his grasp.

He didn’t relent, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into his broad chest. “Let go,” I ordered, trying and failing to push him away.

“No,” he said simply, tightening his hold. “I love you, Y/n. Everything that happened this past week happened for us. For our dream.”

I managed to pull back enough to look up into his eyes. The spark of mischief that normally resided there was gone, replaced by a dull sombreness that made me ache inside. Whatever had happened that week completely changed Taehyung for good. He was no longer quick to smile or joke, and I began to yearn for the blue-haired boy of the past. I couldn’t tell him that, though. Despite everything, I still loved him.

A month passed, and as our graduation approached, Taehyung talked more and more about moving out to the country. I responded enthusiastically outwardly, but on the inside, I didn’t know if moving out was such a good idea. It wasn’t just the way he had changed. It was having issues with my mom as well. Since Manseok never came back around, her behavior grew more erratic each day. I moved back in to take care of her, and she depended heavily on me. I was afraid if I left, she would fall off the deep end again and never be able to make it back to the surface.

The last day I saw Taehyung dawned bright and filled with hope. “I’m feeling good today,” he announced, slinging an arm around my shoulders as we walked to class.

I smiled up at him, glee spreading through my limbs when I saw a trace of that mischievous spark back in his eyes. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” He tossed me a grin. “I haven’t been able to go out and tag anything lately… but I kind of want to tonight. You in?”

“Of course.”

As night approached, we walked hand-in-hand down the street until Taehyung led us back to that bus stop where he painted the “I’m fine/Save me” ambigram. I sat on the bench and watched as he began to create something new. I don’t think he had a set plan. The painting started off in meaningless loops, the jet-black color standing out in stark contrast to the white behind it.

Suddenly, bright lights filled our vision flashing a blinding blue and red. “Freeze!” a loud voice yelled.

I remember Taehyung’s wide, dark eyes finding mine, filled with panic. I remember the rough skin of his palm sliding into mine and yanking me upright. I remember how we sprinted down the street, the fear of being caught pumping adrenaline through us. How he ran faster than me, tugging me along to keep up.

Taehyung looked back and pulled me into an alleyway to try and lose them. We turned a corner and met a dead end. With our backs pressed against the wall, I looked at Tae. “Dammit,” he panted, the corners of his mouth turning upwards despite our situation.

I began to run out the way we came, intending on dragging Taehyung with me, but he yanked me back, slamming me against the wall that entrapped us. He kissed me, feverishly pressing his tongue inside my mouth before I could stop him. He yanked my wrists upwards, pinning them almost painfully against the brick above us as his mouth continued exploring mine and his hands roamed up and down my body.

He pulled back, allowing me to finally suck in some oxygen, and even as I coughed, he continued pressing kisses from my cheek to my jaw to my neck. Tae finally stopped as loud voices and beams of flashlights got closer. “I love you, baby girl,” he murmured. “Don’t forget that.”

“Tae, what—?”

He stepped out from behind the corner, raising his hands in the air. I ducked down into the shadows the alley provided, scooting backwards and pressing my hands over my mouth.

“Get over here, punk,” a gruff voice commanded. I heard the grinding click of handcuffs closing over wrists as another voice began to read Tae his rights.

I scrambled to my feet, realizing too late what was happening. No, no, no, no, no. He couldn’t take the fall for both of us. Not like this. Still, even as I moved to step out into the light and reveal myself, something stopped me. I don’t remember exactly what it was. Possibly the thought of my mother, my friends, how close I was to graduation. Like I said, I don’t remember. All I remember was the panic I felt when I realized the love of my life had just been arrested.

I showed up late to class the next day, not wanting to answer questions from my friends about what had happened and why I looked like absolute shit. I realized my efforts weren’t needed when two detectives pulled me out of class and escorted me to the police station, causing my classmates to start buzzing with gossip like the annoying wasps they were.

“So… L/n Y/n,” the cop, Detective Kwak, said. I looked up at her, nervously twisting my hands in my lap. “You are dating Kim Taehyung, correct?”

I nodded slowly. She had brought me here for “routine questioning,” yet I began to suspect more when they put me in an interrogation room. “For how long?” the detective asked.

“About a year and a half,” I muttered.

“So your relationship was serious?”

“You could say that.”

“How serious?”

I narrowed my eyes at her. “What do you mean?”

“I  mean, how serious were you? Did you have plans for after graduation?”

“I guess. We were going to move in together.”

“Here in the city?”

“No,” I replied, shaking my head. “Somewhere far away.”

“Because of your troubles at home?”

It was then I got defensive. “What do you know about that?” I snapped.

Detective Kwak stared me down, an amused smile playing around the corners of her lips. “I know enough. I was promoted to detective only a month or so ago. Back in my street days, I was one of the cops called to your house.”

My mouth parted in surprise at her words.

“I remember that night pretty clearly,” she continued. “Your mom’s boyfriend attacked you, right?”

I swallowed hard and sank down in my seat, rubbing my arms with my palms in an effort to keep myself contained. “And she did nothing to defend you, correct?” the detective prodded.

“Stop,” I whispered.

“What about Taehyung? Did he do anything to defend you?”

“What the fuck is this about?” I burst out. “I thought you brought me here because… because…”

“Because of the graffiti?” she asked pointedly.

I nodded.

Detective Kwak leaned forward over the table. “Look, Y/n, I don’t give a damn about the fact you were his tagging partner in crime or whatever. This is much bigger than that.”

“What do you mean?”

She sat back and stared at me, her eyes like cold, dark tunnels. “Kim Taehyung has been charged with murder. His prints match a partial we lifted off of a crime scene.”

My mouth dropped open. “W-What?”

“That’s right,” she said. “We only identified the body yesterday. Does the name Lee Manseok mean anything to you?”

I froze as the syllables of my mother’s boyfriend’s name rolled off the detective’s tongue. She nodded at my reaction. “I thought it would. He was found in an abandoned warehouse about a week after he was killed. He’d been beaten to death.”

My blood ran cold, causing goosebumps to raise on the flesh of my arms. I shook my head fiercely. “No, that can’t be right,” I said. “The guy was a dick, anyone could’ve done that to him.”

“That’s what we thought at first. We first suspected his wife.”

“He… He has a wife?”

“And two kids,” the detective scoffed. “Your mom picked a real winner. But then we finally got Taehyung in custody thanks to your shenanigans last night and what do you know? His prints match the one we found at the crime scene.”

“You’ve got it wrong,” I said firmly. “Taehyung wouldn’t do that.”

“Wouldn’t he?” she asked, folding her arms over the table. “Sounds like he really loved you and would do anything to protect you.”

“No, there has to be a mistake. Even if Taehyung did kill him, it had to be out of self-defense or something.”

“Maybe so. But if you knock a guy out and then continue beating him until he dies, is it really self-defense?”

“It is if that guy could come back and hurt someone you love for revenge,” I retorted.

The detective’s face remained expressionless. “Unfortunately, the law says differently.”

“The law can go to hell for all I care.”

She chuckled. “Whatever you say, kid. Look, the crime scene revealed that more than one person beat the literal life out of Manseok. If Taehyung did this, he didn’t do it alone. Do you happen to know who else would have helped him commit murder?”

I stayed silent as I thought for a moment. Any of our friends could’ve helped him, with maybe the exception of Chaeyoung. I thought of Jin, Hoseok, Jungkook, Jimin, Yoongi and Joon. I thought of the way they moved around school like a unified group, making fun of anyone who wasn’t them and bullying people who got in their way, especially any other guy who dared look my way. Still, they wouldn’t have helped Tae commit flat-out murder, would they?

“Anyone at all?”

The detective’s voice brought me out of my thoughts. I shook my head. “No. No one.”

She sighed. “There’s something else. We’ve been trying to get ahold of Taehyung’s father, but he seems to be missing.”

“Missing?”

“Yes. He hasn’t shown up at his job at all in the past month and a half. His credit cards haven’t been used, either.”

“So?” I snapped. “The guy was an alcoholic, he could be holed up somewhere drinking himself to death.”

“Maybe so, but my guess is we’re going to find him in some abandoned building or maybe at the bottom of the ocean one day. Your boy, Taehyung? I’ll bet he’s the one who put him there.”

I slammed my palms on the table. “LIES!” I yelled. “He wouldn’t do that!”

“Wouldn’t he?!” Detective Kwak shouted, rising to her feet. “Tell me something right now, Y/n. Have you noticed him acting differently? Have you noticed any changes in his behavior?”

I immediately looked down at the ground. “No,” I muttered.

“I’m sorry, what was that?”

“I said, NO!”

“Enough with the lies!”

“I’m not lying! You are!”

The detective opened her mouth to retort, then thought better of it and sat down instead. “The evidence doesn’t lie, Y/n,” she said.

“Look,” I said. “If you want someone to put in jail, put me in jail. Taehyung’s gone through enough in his life. Please don’t put him through this.”

“You know I can’t do that.”

Tears welled up in my eyes and I put my hands over my face and began to sob. Detective Kwak stood up and came around to my side of the table before placing a hand on my shoulder. Once my sobs began to cease, she offered me a tissue. I wiped my eyes and blew my nose. “Thanks,” I muttered.

“Listen,” she said gently. “I’ve made arrangements for your aunt to come pick you up.”

I looked up at the detective in surprise. “My aunt?”

“Yes. Your mom’s sister. She’s filed to gain custody of you, and in light of recent events, a judge granted it to her.”

“Wait, my mom’s sister? I thought she lived in America.”

Detective Kwak’s mouth visibly tightened. “No, actually, she lives in Busan. Seems your mom kept that from you as well. Your aunt’s been trying to get in contact with you, Y/n. She says she sent letters.”

I stared at the wall across from me. Every limb, every nerve ending, every cell in my body was starting to go numb. It was all too much. My boyfriend was a murderer, my mom’s ex-boyfriend was dead, Taehyung’s dad was missing, and now all of a sudden I had a long-lost aunt who was now my sole guardian?”

“She’s very well off,” the detective continued. “She’s even offered to pay for your mom to get treatment in a rehabilitation facility. Whatever future you have with her is sure to be a bright one.”

“If you say so.”

“I know so. I’ve met her, only briefly, but she seems very nice.”

I let the silence grow between us, not bothering to give a response. The detective finally sighed and sat back down in her chair across from me. “Y/n, Taehyung is going to jail for a very long time. Maybe even for the rest of his life. I suggest you move on with your life. Move to Busan. You’ll attend a great school there, and probably university as well. You can start down an entirely new path.”

The memory of Taehyung’s handsome face swam before my eyes, his bright, boxy smile lighting my insides on fire the way it had for the past year and a half. “What if I don’t want to?” I whispered.

“Well… That’s up to you. But the sooner you move on, the sooner you’ll stop feeling this pain.”

Detective Kwak stood up, motioning for me to stand up as well. “Come on. Your aunt’s waiting.”

We exited the interrogation room, the skin on my face itchy and dry from crying. I knew I probably looked like a mess, but I didn’t care.

“Y/n!” a deep, familiar voice shouted. I froze in my tracks, slowly raising my eyes to his inky ones. He struggled in the grip of two cops, his hands handcuffed behind his back.

“Hey baby girl,” he said, smirking. “Nice of you to come visit me.”

“What the fuck is he doing here?” Detective Kwak hissed.

“You said to move him into the interrogation room.”

“While it’s still occupied?!”

“Don’t worry,” Taehyung quipped. “We can share, right baby?”

“Get him out of here!” Detective Kwak snapped. “Now!”

The cops shoved Taehyung towards the interrogation room. I turned to look at him, desperation clenching at my heart. I realized this might be the last time I saw him, the last time I would get to tell him something. Anything. My mouth opened but no words came out.

“Don’t worry, baby girl!” Taehyung shouted, lurching towards me. “I’ll get out someday! And I’ll come for you! I will always come for you!”

I shook my head and felt tears prick at my eyes once more as the police wrestled with him. “I love you, Y/n!” he shouted just before they shut the door on him.

“Sorry about that,” Detective Kim said, holding a hand to her heaving chest. “You weren’t supposed to cross paths.”

“It’s okay,” I murmured, and to my own surprise, I meant it. I was glad I saw him one last time. I realized, in that moment, that the blue-haired boy I once knew and fell in love with was completely gone. His eyes, which once held a spark of playfulness and mischief, now held nothing but misery and woe. He let his anger for the world overtake him, allowing it to blaze a path of self-destruction that I could no longer follow.

Maybe the detective was right. Despite the fact that Kim Taehyung was the love of my life, maybe, just maybe, it was time to move on.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Part One is HEEEEEEERE! 😉

[purplesurveys]

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Who are you subscribed to on YouTube?  Oh man, I’m probably subscribed to over a hundred, if not 200. I’ve subscribed to channels relevant to interests I’ve had over the years, and since it’s not my habit to do spring cleaning on my feeds, the subscriptions have just keep piling up even if I no longer keep up with literally like 98% of them.

Do you like to go to the farmer's market?  I don’t think I’ve ever been in one yet. They aren’t very common here and the ones we do have are pricey and mostly inaccessible to the everyday consumer, I’m sure.

What will (or was) the color of your wedding dress be?  I wouldn’t want any other color than white.

What's your favorite melon?  I don’t like fruits.

What was the name of the last pet of yours that died?  Arlee. Technically my family mostly considered her as just Nina’s pet, but the sting was felt all the same when we learned she died.

When was the last time you wished the day would just get over with?  Yesterday, because it was Friday. Pretty self-explanatory, I wanted to get to the weekend so I can finally let go of work for a couple of days.

Name one person you've never had a fight with:  Andi. I think we’re both afraid of pissing the other off, which works out for us lol.

What are you currently listening to?  I can just hear the really loud whirring of my electric fan because it’s a grossly humid day today.

What would you rather have: cat or dog?  Dogs.

Who is your least favorite person in real life?  I have a lot of uncles I just don’t like.

Do you ever watch anybody's live stream of... anything, really?  Technically, yeah. I will sometimes tune in to livestreams of lofi music on YouTube, but I do it to listen, not to watch. 

Does your house have security cameras?  No.

If you go grey as you age, would you dye your hair or let it be?  I think I might dye it for a certain period of time, but I also think I would eventually reach the point where I’ll just accept it and slowly let go of the dye.

What was the last establishment you stopped going to due to bad service? What happened?  I haven’t run into much bad service, but I’ll never forget how long my order and bill took for Mad Mark’s. I never really vowed per se to never go back there again and I definitely didn’t confront the staff, but I haven’t eaten there since that incident.

What soundtrack do you listen to the most?  Not a big soundtrack listener.

Was there a family secret you weren’t told about until you were an adult?  Nah, they’re kept from us until now. The biggest one I’ve heard about was having a kleptomaniac in the family but we were never told who it is.

Do you have an opinion most people you meet seem to disagree with you?  Yeah, my dislike for fruits.

What’s something you like to have many options to choose from?  Clothes, I guess, like bucket hats. I don’t shop a lot and clothes aren’t a priority in my budget, so when I do pick out clothes, it has to be exactly what I want so that I don’t feel it was a waste of money.

What’s the strangest decorative object you own?  We have several quirky, disconnected decor in the living room from gifts we’ve acquired over the years. One object I can tell you about is the polar bear glass figurine we have on the coffee table.

What’s a thing you couldn’t imagine doing with your life right now?  Dating around.

What’s been your proudest moment?  Managing to stay alive this year and turn my life around for the better when I thought there was no hope.

What’s the filthiest non-pornographic movie you’ve seen?  Eyes Wide Shut, probably.

Do you know anyone who doesn't seem to be fond of animals?  I don’t think so. Like any animal...? I would find that quite odd, honestly. And I wouldn’t want to be friends with them if we weren’t already close .

Are you planning any outings or trips anytime soon? Whereabouts?  No, nothing set in stone. I do want to fly out to South Korea soon, though.

Do you know anyone who has a phobia of a certain animal?  I know a few people who are afraid of dogs.

Is there a particular brand of technology/electronics that you prefer?  Yeah, Apple.

Is there a singer whose voice gives you goosebumps/chills?  Hayley Williams and Jin, especially when he’s belting; and I don’t listen to her much, but I find that Billie Eilish has a unique voice that sounds really nice.

And is there a singer whose voice you simply can't stand?  Selena Gomez for some of her songs, Meghan Trainor for most of her songs.

Are there any authors that are particularly dominant on your bookshelf?  No.

Have you seen any photographs or videos that made you smile today?  Sure.

Which item in your fridge are you most looking forward to consuming? My aunt sent over this gigantic-ass slab of salmon that I can’t wait to eat as sashimi. I already had a few pieces last night and it was hea ven ly.

Has anyone you know got into a new relationship lately?  Hmm, I don’t think so. I know my coworker Dev got into a relationship a few weeks ago but it fizzled out as soon as it started because the guy was shitty.

If you menstruate, do you experience much PMS prior to it?  Only on the emotional side; I rarely get physical symptoms. I usually feel down or emotionally heavy a few days before my period.

Have you ever had a tattoo covered up or added to?  No, I don’t have any tattoos. Can you remember the last time you had a sudden change of mind?  Hmm, like last night. I wanted to stay up to maximize the weekend, buuuut I decided against it and slept instead since I had been up since 2 in the morning.

When was the last time you did something on a whim?  Two weeks ago when I impulsively dropped a thousand bucks to have cheese tarts delivered to Angela and Reena, hahaha.

Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you?  My mom, grandma, and one of my aunts were the main people who raised me. Dad works overseas, so he was never at home much.

Have you ever began a relationship with someone you knew for less than a week?  No, I wouldn’t do that.

Has one of your friends ever tried to ‘hook you up?’  Mik tried to pair me with one of his friends just days before I finally implied on social media that I was no longer in a relationship. It was a cool ego boost but I declined, since my emotions were still super turbulent then. Andi tried to initiate sex with me once too, but I also declined.

What is your card game of choice?  I hate card games; I can never seem to understand them lmao, though that’s really more of a me problem than anything else.

What is your favourite books series?  Growing up, I really loved the Septimus Heap series. But the thing about it was that I got into it while the series was still ongoing; and with how bad my attention span is, I always forgot the events/plot whenever the newest book came out. 

So whenever that happened I had to read the entire series from Book 1; eventually the number of books I had to reread/revisit became too many (it was a seven-part series) and I simply just lost the time to read and I never got to know about the conclusion.

Do you prefer landmarks or street names when being given directions?  Street names – more precise. Landmarks to me can be pretty subjective – a green building might look blue to me, and I could just end up being lost.

Do you read the prologues in the beginnings of books?  Sure.

What was your favourite gym class moment?  If I genuinely like or already play the sport that was being taught. That’s why PE table tennis was a lot of fun for me.

Do you think that ocean boardwalks are fun?  I’ve never been on one but I imagine they are fun, yeah.

Do you dread when people ask you to sign their yearbooks?  That’s not a tradition here.

Do you have a favourite Scooby-Doo movie?  No. I was too young for Scooby-Doo in a sense that I do remember watching the movies as a 3/4 year old as they were kept on in the background at home, but I didn’t get any of the plots/didn’t really appreciate the films.

Do you think it’s cute when toddlers try to run away and fall down?  Sometimes, yeah. If the fall looked nasty I would obviously be concerned.

Do you enjoy listening to your grandparents tell stories of their past?  Honestly, only one of my grandparents would be the type to do this but he’s been dead for six years now. It’s a big shame he passed before I could bond with him the way I had always wanted to. My three other grandparents are either too closed off or too quiet to share stories from their youth.

Do you have a crush on someone? Nah, nothing more than a celebrity crush.

If so... what does his/her name begin with? 

What attracts you to them? 

Do they know that you like them? 

If they don't know, why didn't you tell them? 

Name two people that you miss:  Angela and Laurice.

Have you ever seen Titanic?  More times than I can count. I’m sure I memorize like 80% of the script, too.

Have you ever swam with dolphins?  No. I’m not so sure if I’ve seen dolphins, either. Maybe I have? Or maybe I’m confusing it with whales...idrk.

When was the last time you had a stomachache?  Wednesday.

What's going to bed early for you?  11 PM or midnight.

Do you want to have a big family in the future?  I used to, but I don’t think that’s the future I want anymore. One or two kids should be okay.

What was the last thing you did that gave you a rush?  Technically speaking, an orgasm, I guess?? Lmao idk

Favorite Nicholas Cage movie?  I don’t think I have one.

Have you had your Covid vaccine yet? Which one, if you have?  Yeah, I’m fully dosed. Sinovac.

If you've had your vaccine, did you experience any side effects?  I was suuuuuuper tired right after my first dose and I wanted to be knocked the fuck out, but I went right back to work after the shot because I am allergic to filing leaves hahaha. Second dose went smoothly.

What's the next item of clothing that you intend to buy for yourself?  A bucket hat or maybe one of the Fila x BTS shirts because the collection is actually quite cute!

What Facebook groups have you found the most helpful?  I join Facebook groups to be entertained, not because I actively look for advice.

Do you like your butt? Why or why not?  Yeah. It...has a good form hahahahahaha.

Have you ever personally been a victim of homophobia?  Yes, a few years ago I went to a food park with my ex-girlfriend. I was already not feeling my best that day to begin with, so having to see an old woman stare daggers at us for what felt like years really stung. I felt small under her look and almost cried, but in the end I felt angry that I momentarily felt shame about my relationship. I decided to just piss the woman off on purpose and do PDA right in front of her.

Do you think you’d be happier if you had a pet? I have two dogs at present and I know they make me extremely happy.

Who was the last person you went on a date with?  Gabie.

Were you ever hospitalized as a little kid?  No. The first and only time I was hospitalized (other than being birthed), I was about 12, I think.

What’s your favorite way to curl your hair?  I don’t do that. I rarely style my hair.

At what age did you start swearing?  I was 11.

What is something you physically can’t do?  Ride a bike.

What do like better, apples or oranges?  I don’t like any fruits; but in terms of flavored stuff, I like orange-flavored food, especially chewy candy, slightly more.

Around the holidays, do you hope for snow?  Well, no.

What are your top two favorite bands?  Paramore and Against Me!

How many people do you 100% trust?  There are a handful. I generally trust easily just because I like to believe all people are kind and loyal – but I can also take it away in the snap of a finger.

Do you care what others think about you?  Not so much.

Has anyone ever called you a bitch?  Sure.

Did you watch Teletubbies when you were younger?  Yeah but just super super faint memories. It wasn’t one of my main shows.

Do you have any licenses other than your driver's license?  I don’t.

Could you live the rest of your life without eating meat?  I doubt it. I could try, but I think I’d get cranky and start looking for meat way earlier than I would like to admit.

Have you ever had a rolling backpack?  Yup, if you mean a stroller. I think I’ve answered this on a previous survey.

Did you make any money today?  No, because it’s a weekend. What was the highest place you've ever jumped from?  Nothing dramatically high. I’ve had acrophobia-themed nightmares in the past, so even though I don’t actually have a fear of heights, the idea of jumping from a high place still makes me antsy.

Have you ever gone swimming in a river?  Not that I can recall.

What was the last souvenir someone got you?  I dunno if it counts but Andi bought merch from the AEW shop but made sure to also get a CM Punk sticker set for me :(

Do you have a favorite remix of a song?  Remixes have never been my thing. What do you think is the most saddest sounding instrument?  Piano.

Do you really pay attention to the ratings on movies?  Yeah they can definitely affect the level of appreciation I hold towards a film. For instance, if I genuinely enjoyed a movie only to find out it has average to bad reviews, it invites me to think more critically about the movie.

Do you have a favorite species of wild cat (tiger/lion/cougar/etc.)?  No.

If you had $500,000, what would you do with it?  Give half to my parents and let them do whatever they wish it. With the remaining P12,500,000, I’d probably get myself my own condo and have it fully furnished, then get braces, then get a new phone and laptop. I’ll have a bunch of money still left, I’m pretty sure – the rest of it I’ll save.

Did the last person you touched lips with have a kid?  No. I mean, I have honestly no clue what’s going on in her life now, but I know she doesn’t want kids so this is very unlikely.

"First loves are never really over." Is this true for you?  It’s true in a sense that she left me a lot of trauma and self-esteem issues that will irrevocably always be a part of me now even though I’ve worked hard to resolved most of them by myself.

Did you like Michael Jackson before he died?  Yes, because he has always been my favorite singer’s role model.

What are some things that would make you break up with someone?  I don’t know how to answer this question, honestly. All the red flags were thrown and tossed and slapped into my face and down my throat for six years yet I never left. I don’t actually know what my limits are, and I believe it’s because my coping mechanism has to just accept things and suck them up no matter how bad they get. That’s what I’m trying to change for myself now.

What was the worst breakup you've ever had?  I’ve had two breakups with the same person, and the second one was worse.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #280

“this is the place in our mind with a crooked crown / we came to execute its own perfect shutdown”

Do you have a strong local accent? No. Do you prefer green or red grapes? Red, but either is fine so long as they’re crisp. Can you stand on your hands unassisted? pffff Who was the last person to knock/ring at your door? Pizza guy. How old were you when you last went trick or treating? No idea. Have you ever been bobbing for apples? ”No. That’s a gross game lol you’re dipping your head and mouth into water other people are dipping their head and mouth into.” <<<< This. What’s your most expensive piece of clothing? No clue. What’s the last thing you took a picture of? Guys I actually took a selfie bc for once in my goddamn life, I felt really pretty with the makeup Summer did on me. She's working towards a degree in cosmetology and is so talented with it. What’s the last thing you drew a picture of? A meerkat pup. Have you ever been on a pogo stick? Omg, yes. I got one for I think Christmas one year as a kid and I got SO into it. I learned how to do it really well. Can you down a pint (of anything) in one? Probably not without throwing up. Have you ever been banned from a public place? No. Have you ever been in a newspaper? A couple times, I think. I know once in elementary school for when I was in chorus; we went somewhere for a small Christmas show. Then I believe I was in it for another school thing? Idr. What football team do you support? I don’t care for football or sports in general. What did you want to be when you grew up? My phases included paleontologist, vet, movie director, author, game designer, aaaand I know I’m forgetting one. But my current and long-term goal has been to become a photographer. Being an artist as a free time “job” has always been an aspiration, too. Have you ever tie-dyed your own clothes? In school, yeah. How often do you buy new clothes? Very rarely. Usually just around Christmas or my birthday from gift cards I get. Are you reliable? In some ways yes, in other ways no. Are you proud of yourself? No. If you could ask your future self one question what would it be? If she’s ended up happy. Do you hold grudges? Nah. Do you decorate the outside of your house for Christmas? Mom does pretty much last minute, but only sometimes when looking at the past few years. Can you solve sudoku puzzles? Sure, they’re fun. What’s the most unusual conversation you've ever had? Who knows. Are you much of a gambler? Not at all. I don’t fuck around with money, especially when just $5 makes you feel great. Have you ever been to Disneyland? I’ve been to Disney World. Do you sing in the shower? Very rarely. Almost never now that I don’t play music while I’m in there. As a child did you ever suck your thumb or fingers? I mean probably? I do know I loved my pacifier and was SO upset when Mom’s doctor or someone playfully told me I was gonna have to give it up because my upcoming baby sister would want to steal it, and guess what? Nicole never fucking used a pacifier so I was tilted lmao. What time do you usually go to bed? Lol BRO it can be as early as 7 PM on bad depression days to as late as like, 2-3 AM. I’d say the average time is like… 9:30. What's your favorite animal? MEERKATS hngggggggggggggggg Have you ever been in marching band? No. Do you have any enemies? No? At least I don’t consider anyone to be. Have you ever been a cheerleader? As a kid, Mom wanted me to so I could do something with my sisters, who were actually interested in cheerleading. She certainly didn’t force me to or anything, I just agreed to it despite not being into it. We were with this Christian sports group for a long time doing various sports all the while being taught lessons in Christlikeness. I’ve actually got warm memories of it Did you ever date anyone on the football team? No. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No, not that I’m against the idea tho. The plushy would just have to be very special to me and also comfortable to hold. How many consecutive days have you ever missed of school? I missed an entire week when I learned about Mom’s cancer. I could barely function. With how much school stressed me, I would NOT have managed. Have you ever been pregnant? No, not in my to-do list. When was the last time you wanted to speak out, but couldn’t? I’m sure it was recently over Facebook; most times, I keep my mouth shut over political things on there that might get me fired up because I’m afraid of confrontation. Are fingerless gloves awesome? I love them. Wore them daily in high school. I still have some of my favorites, though I’m doubtful they still fit my hands… Would you rather be cannibalistic or die in the wilderness? Okay so I’m gonna actually go kinda in-detail, so the squeamish be warned. Realistically, I think I’d choose to die. ESPECIALLY if I was the one expected to kill another person; then, there’s no question. I wouldn’t be able to do it either if I knew the person. If it was some stranger someone else killed and cooked, I don’t know with absolute certainty; starvation really can make animals out of people. I do know for sure I’d vomit. I far more heavily lean into still preferring to die, because I just believe some things aren’t worth living after they’ve been committed. I’d hate myself. I’d rather die feeling clean of conscience. Would you survive on a deserted island? Hell no. Have you dyed your hair eccentric colors in the past? Yeah, I want to do it far more often… What size drink do you usually get at fast food restaurants? Medium, sometimes small. What do you think is the best thing in life? Love, both platonic and romantic. Have you ever sold anything online either on Craigslist, eBay, Amazon, etc.? If not, what is your website of choice like any of the above for buying things? We sold our previous dog over Craigslist, and I sold my iguana there as well. I know Mom has used eBay and Amazon, but idk for what. Have you ever seen an animal give birth? Have you ever had a pet give birth before? I’ve seen old pet cats give birth many times. What is something you want to try to accomplish within the next year? I want a job that I’m content with and can mentally handle. Oh, and I REALLY want to make strong progress on recovering from the muscle atrophy in my legs. What’s the most unusual kind of pizza you’ve ever tried? I have no clue; I’m not that adventurous with pizza or food in general. If you were given the chance to decorate an entire house the way you wanted, with no limit to cost, how would you decorate it? GOTHIC AS A MOTHERFUCKER WELCOME TO THE GOTDAMN ADDAMS FAMILY. What’s one of your favorite things to touch/feel? My cat. :’) How often do you wear tights? Ew, never. Has there ever been anything you’ve become interested in much later than other people? I guess Instagram, but only as a viewer. I don’t have a personal one, just for my photography that I only rarely post. Have you ever had a veggie burger? Yeah, during my vegetarian streak. Burger King’s really aren’t that bad so long as the patty is made well. Do you like candles? Yeah, sure. When was the last time you wore a sports bra? Forever ago when I was doing Wii Fit. Where did you get the shirt you’re currently wearing? I think Hot Topic? It’s an oversized Umbreon shirt. Who last messaged you on Facebook? My friend Summer when we were planning our lil witch photoshoot w/ friends. Who last walked you home? lol you don’t just have someone “walk you home” here. Bundles of homes are way too far and in-between for reasonable walking distance. Did you make any new friends lately? If so, what are their names and how did you meet them? Not really recently, no. Would you rather see your favorite band/artist in concert with 2 other people or have a free $20,000 shopping spree to Walmart? Seeing Ozzy with my mom would be a DREAM, but to be realistic, I’d take the shopping spree pretty damn quickly. $20k? That would do WONDERS for us, especially as we’re about to move into a new place. When was the last time you threw up and why did you? A long time ago when I started a new medication. Do you want revenge on the person who has hurt you the most? … I’m gonna be REAL honest. For the most part, no. But ngl there are times I’m like “I’m gonna work on getting back in shape and become H O T” like a petty bitch lmao this is embarrassing to admit. Has anyone ever claimed that you saved their life? Yes. Did you ever have that near-drowning experience? No. Have you ever performed on stage? For dance, yes, but I never did a solo. Are you a jealous person? Not jealous (usually), but I’ve come to realize I’m a pretty envious piece of shit. Morning person or night person? I’m in my best mood in the morning because I have the “it’s a fresh start” ideology. Then I repeat exactly what I did the day before. :^) Have you ever written a poem for someone? Numerous times. Do you meditate? No, but I wish I could without it only causing more stress. Do you like cranberries that they serve for Thanksgiving? EW I hate cranberries. What don't you understand that frustrates you? Finances. Do you plan on going to college? I’ve tried college three times and dropped out each time. I’m done trying with school. Do you believe the governments hide technology and information from the public? AbsoFUCKINGlutely. Which is your favorite Pokemon? Ninetales! What horror fiction character scares you the most? What’s the name of the villain in the Scream series? Ghostface? I don’t feel like looking it up, but he TERRIFIED me as a kid, and I still think he’s mega creepy. Were you part of the Brownies/Cubs/Scouts/Guides etc? I was in Girl Scouts. Have you ever invented a fairly unique meal or drink? No. Do you have any family secrets? Don’t think so. Do you often read your horoscope? Never. They’re bullshit. Have you ever had a proper Tarot reading? No; also bullshit. Have you ever milked a cow? No. Do you love or hate rollercoasters? They’ve always scared me because I’m afraid of throwing up. Now with how dizzy I get, I absolutely refuse to try one because I WILL faint with all the movement. What’s your favorite sportswear brand? idc Who’s your favorite superhero? Does Deadpool count? Who’s your favorite villain/baddie? If we’re still in the comics/superhero universe, the Joker. Have you ever won a giant-sized cuddly toy from a fair? No. What would you say is your favorite album of all time? Black Rain by Ozzy Osbourne. I fucking adore it; it was my introduction to metal, and still after all this time, every track S L A P S. I deadass played that CD so much that it scratches at a few points. Do you dislike hairy people? lol fuck this question. I’m guessing you’re asking if I find them attractive and not as if people I “dislike” them, but in both cases, it’s no. We’re mammals, who the fuck cares how hairy you are. Do you like your own name? I actually do really like my name. My first one, anyway. Would you ever sign a Prenuptial agreement? NOPE. Want one? You’re gonna have to find someone else willing to, my man. How long has your longest ever phone call been? No less than two hours, but I know more. I have three instances in particular where I talked with either friends or Jason for SO long. Could you ever have an affair with a married person? Hell no. What is your family Christmas like? Nicole comes here so she and I open presents with Mom, then we spend the day at my older sister’s to be with the kids. We also try to squeeze visiting Dad in there the same day, but sometimes it has to be a different one. If you met a genie who offered you three wishes, what would you wish for? (more wishes does not count) Just three is hard… but #1 is indisputably world peace, and then uhhhh the end of poverty and maybe the cure for cancer. I’d have a super hard time picking a third; so many things matter to me. Have you ever had your national flag painted on your face? No, not in my plans. Do you have any strange body things? Well, define “strange,” I guess? Nothing like, really strange. What fairy tale character would you most associate with? Can I be Snow White and attract cute critters like moths to a flame? Also I would 100% take a Good apple. If a loved one was to serenade you, what song would you most like them to sing? It would depend on the person and our bond, really. Is there a cherished song between us? What is our relationship like? There’s no umbrella song I can think of. Is your dad an embarrassing dancer? GUYS!!!!!!!!!!! My sister’s wedding, okay? Father/daughter dance? He actually has MOVES and it was incredible man, never gonna forget that. What if any unusual objects have you swallowed? Nothing, I think. If you were stinking rich, would you only go to places other rich people went? Hell naw, man. There are plenty of great, affordable places in all categories. I could be a millionaire and you’d still see my ass in McDonald’s ordering a burger and fries lmao. Have you ever owned a slinky? My sisters and I had multiple as kids; those were d o p e. Teenage parents, good, bad, or indifferent? An AWFUL idea. A teenager is physically, most likely financially, and mentally unprepared to raise a child properly. It can seriously affect the kid, and of course the parent. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever broken? I’m unsure. Pirate downloads, good or bad? It’s bad… yet plenty (myself included) have/do do it. Democracy, good or bad? Good. It’s very important to me that rule should come from the people’s majority versus a small coalition of rich guys. While the majority is not always right, it seems like the best option to me. Communism, good or bad? Okay so to be totally honest I actually don’t entirely understand what communism outlines. Like I just read multiple definitions and small articles and I’m still kinda like “????”, though judging by the countries listed as those governed by communism, I would guess it’s bad? Have you ever been electrocuted? On an electric fence, but it wasn’t too bad. Have you ever been hit on by someone of the same gender? Yeah. The war in Iraq, good or bad? Get the fuck out of it. To start with, I’m a pretty fierce pacifist, and just… killing and killing and killing for YEARS is so goddamn pointless and is just a massacre. The war in Afganistan, good or bad? jfc ^ Have you ever appeared on YouTube? LET’S NEVER TALK ABOUT THIS lmfao Have you ever eaten anything prepared by a celebrity chef? No,, but that’d be dope. Have you ever been on radio? No. Do you prefer male or female singers voices? ”Their gender doesn’t matter, but their talent does.” <<<< Do you have a list of things to do before your ‘x’ years old? Goals should not be judged by age. I’m bad at this and have to remind myself of it a lot. A goal is a goal regardless of a number. Celebrate for *you*. Are you proud, comfortable or ashamed of your body? Very very much ashamed. Do you know html? Super poorly. Have you ever flown first class? lol hunny What are better, violins or pianos? Violins. How old is your oldest blanket? As old as me. My baby blanket is stored somewhere. Do you take enough vacations? lol hell no. I’ve maybe gone on three vacations in my entire life. Have you ever been sick on your birthday? Yup. Then one time I was recovering from a wicked stomach virus but went to Olive Garden anyway lol. I was fine though, and it’s actually a sweet memory because Jason (he worked there at the time) got the staff to do the whole “happy birthday” thing. I got a bombin’ brownie. Who is your favorite person? Sara and my mom. What do you do to stay healthy? lol you assume I’m healthy. What is your favorite form of exercise? Swimming. Do you like going to church? I never did. As a kid, I would cry when/if Mom decided we were going to mass after Sunday school lmao. It’s always been boring and too long to me, even when I was religious. Have you ever fallen asleep during a sermon? Probably as a kid. Do you like to pray for others? No. I don’t believe anyone hears them or will intervene somehow if I ask anyway. Have you ever witnessed a miracle? No. I don’t think I believe in those anyway. Have you ever been the recipient of a miracle? Definitely not. How did you or whoever come up with the name(s) for your pet(s)? I thought “Roman” was a majestic name for a male cat, and Venus has the coloration that the planet does. Who did you last walk a dog with? Sara and I walked Buster the last time I was there. It was windy as SHIT so we didn’t get far because my ass was absolutely freezing, all the while Sara was used to it. Ride bikes with? Wow, good question. I haven’t ridden a bike in many, many years. Hold hands with? My friend Summer did yesterday when she was trying to reassure me of something. For what reason did you last high five someone? Ryder and Aubree each caught Pokemon in Pokemon GO. :’’’’) I was watching them in the car while my sister/their mom was doing something at work, and they wanted to play it; they’ve come to learn that between my phone and DS, I’m the Pokemon provider, lol. I was the proudest fucking aunt ever bc they did SO GOOD after getting the hang of throwing the ball like Y’ALL. When Ash came back to the car, I gave ‘em each high fives before getting back in. What color and type is your vehicle? Don’t have my own car. Looking to upgrade or add any time soon? I doubt I’ll have my own soon. What animal do you have the most possessions *of*, or featuring? Like, décor or stuffed animals, things like that? Not the actual living creature? Easily meerkats, holy shit do I have a collection. What do you use to wash your dishes? Gain soap. Last thing you measured? Uhhh idk. Last thing you weighed? Myself. Last song you danced to? *shrug* What do you remember from your dream last night? I just remember it was a nightmare about Dad being angry. How old were you when you got your first credit card? Lol I don’t have one. Do you talk to your parent(s) [almost] every day? Mom, yes. Dad, no, because we don’t live together. What does your shampoo and conditioner smell like? I just started using a Dove brand shampoo targeting dandruff, so I don’t think it has a specific smell. I don’t use conditioner, just adds grease to your hair, plus mine is short anyway. Last person to tell you that you smell good? Idk. Last person you told that they smell good? I also don’t know. If you smoke marijuana, what is your preferred or typical method? I’ve never touched it. Last person you ran into unexpectedly? Ummm idr. How many plants can you see right now? There’re none in my room. Last compliment you received on your appearance? HA On your character/personality? That I was a loving sister. Do you remain friends with anyone you met at your first job? N/A Who have you hugged in the past month? My mom, Summer, sisters, niece and nephew, Dad… Newest musical discovery? 3TEETH is great. Like, I'm obsessed. Their cover of “Pumped Up Kicks” snagged my attention, despite actually being iffy about it at first. Guess what I’m listening to this minute lmao. Last thing you cleaned? A cup. What exactly do you carry around all your stuff in? A purse. What do you carry around, typically? Phone, keys, wallet, hand sanitizer, and my iPod are items of note. Where is your newest scar? It’s on the palm of my left hand from Roman playing with me. Where is your oldest scar? Idk. Last thing you disposed of? The milk carton. What was the last picture someone sent you? Mom sent me a gif from Hocus Pocus to fit the witch photoshoot Summer, her friend, and I did. Did you hear a siren today? No. What do you typically drink? I would rather not pretend I tend to drink soda lmao Last bad news you heard? My aunt’s brother committed suicide a couple days ago. Last good news you heard? I don’t really know. How far away is the closest cinema from your house? It’s like, 15-ish minutes away. Have you ever been to the emergency room? Many times. Are you one of those people who can’t go without their morning coffee? Y’all know me and coffee. But in place, I have my morning Mountain Dew, rip in fucking pieces. Have you ever worn fake eyelashes? No, though I’m honestly curious what I’d look like. Do you know the story of how your parents met? If so, tell me? They were coworkers; that’s all I know. What is your favorite Chinese food? I love pork fried rice. Do you live far from your parents? I live with my Mom. I live around 20 minutes or so away from Dad. What was the last hot food you ate? I’m assuming you mean spicy as opposed to just hot as in temperature. In that case, probably hot wings. Have you ever seen a meteor shower? No. Describe your current position: I’m lying down in bed, just kinda perked up by my two pillows. Have you used a microwave today? Yes; I had a Jimmy Dean breakfast bowl. Do you prefer going out for coffee or brewing your own? N/A Have you consumed caffeine today? If so, in what form? yikes- Do you know anyone who follows a raw vegan diet and lifestyle? Not that I know of. Have you killed a bug this week? Yes; we’re dealing with a lovely mix of gnats and fleas. What was the first food you learned how to cook? Scrambled eggs. Or maybe pancakes with Mom’s assistance. Idr. Do you have a Bachelor’s degree? If so, what in? No. How many email accounts do you have? Two. Can you go see a doctor alone or do you like to take someone with you? I like my mom to be with me. How long is your average shower? 15 minutes, maybe? It depends on the routine I feel like doing. When’s the last time you had a headache? Yesterday. What woke you up this morning? I think I woke up naturally? A rare occasion nowadays. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Summer, yesterday.

[ladybugsfanfics]

Seven Days [2/7]

→ Pairing: prince!Loki Odinson x pirate!reader

(eventually prince!Loki x pirate!Steve Rogers x pirate!reader)

→ WC:  2.5k

→ Warnings: Smut, some blood gore, idk, awkwardness, nightmares, (countless) sexual innuendos

→ Summary: Prince Loki has run sick of not feeling welcome at the palace and asks to join you and your life forever. You give him seven days to try the new life, seven days to realize how much he loves you. And in those seven days, he learns to know you, and himself (and the first mate) a little better… In the end, he only has one question left to answer. Will he stay?

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

Cold wind wakes Loki. He’s drenched in sweat, his heart pounds and his throat feels dry. The cover has fallen off, lying at the end of the bed. Your side of the bed is empty, cold. The imprint of your body lingers behind, a lasting effect of body warmth. 

Loki finds his pants on the floor under the cover. He drags them on in one swift motion and lets his bare feet hit the wooden planks of the cabin as he tightens them around his hips. The planks creek under his weight, feels cold against his skin, but he moves along either way. 

The door is slightly ajar, letting in streaks of light from the moon high above in the dark night. Loki pushes it open enough to slip through and lets if fall back to the little opening it had. 

You stand by the mast, eyes cast out over the black ocean and the starry night that envelops the ship. Against the darkness of the night, you stand out with your white shirt and the sparkling silver and gold in your ears. Moonlight reflects off them, basks in the depths of your eyes and creates an image of beauty Loki wishes never to forget. 

A quiet wind washes over the deck, blowing through your hair. Loki takes in the slight tug of your lips as it brushes your skin, takes in the shift in your eyes. You look calm, content. 

You look the opposite of what he sees when you’re ashore. Instead of the wary feeling of lurking danger, you look light and relaxed. Shoulders down, head leaning against the mast with a dopey smile on your face and eyes that stare into the nothingness of the night. 

With light steps, he traces his way to you. He hoped to be quiet, to make his way there without taking away the serendipity of your expression, but even as you move your head to the side and glance at him, the look remains. Loki smiles as you open your arms in greeting. 

Stepping to you, your arms snake around his torso. Your head leans against his chest instead of the mast, and he slowly begins to stroke long fingers through your hair. In the silence of the night, standing there with you, Loki feels content as well. Just this way, the night feels like it’s everything, and despite knowing there are other people there (still awake and on duty) it feels like it’s just the two of you. 

The silence stretches on for another few moments, until you break it, voice dipped low and barely above a whisper. “How do you like it?” 

He contemplates his answer. The question is open, letting him tell you anything he wants, good or bad, about his first day. However, you didn’t ask if he likes it, you asked how. Standing there in the dark with you, he has his answer. 

“So far, it’s the best choice I ever made,” he replies, “and I don’t believe that to change.”

You let out a small laugh. “Maybe I’ve been too easy on you.”

Loki shakes his head, tugging a little extra on your hair to tilt your face up so he can gaze into your eyes. They spark together with the grin that colors your face. “It’s the best choice, whether I have to hate your first mate or not.”

“Ahh, Rogers’s getting on your nerves, huh?” You nod, letting your head fall back down to lean against Loki’s chest and watch the ocean’s life beyond the ship’s railing. “He has a thing for doing that. Means he likes you.”

Loki shakes his head knowingly, lets his gaze fall in the same direction as you. His eyes trace the steady rhythm of the waves, the small splashes that makes against the ship. Small drops of saltwater rains down on the deck that, every now and then, finds Loki to land on. 

“Can I ask something?” His voice sounds like an echo of his thoughts. 

“‘Course,” you reply, though the same layer of absence comes through your tone. 

Loki takes a deep breath, testing the words in his mind. On his tongue. Formed on his lips. Before he says them. “How did you end up here?” 

You tense in his embrace, and he chances a quick look down in fear he made you uncomfortable. Yet, you only look up at him with a small smile, shoulders relaxed. Your arms comes up to cup his cheek, drags his face down to meet yours, and you press a chaste kiss to his lips. “It’s a long story,” you mutter against them. 

“I have time,” he whispers back. 

You press another quick kiss to his lips. “Good.” You shift in his hold, making to sit down on the deck instead of standing. Even in the shift, you still lean against his chest and as you start to talk, his fingers keep grooming through your hair. 

“I was born on a stormy night. On a ship, just like this.” You take a deep breath. “My father was a sailor turned to the pirate life from necessity. My mother had run away with him a year earlier, from a family of merchants. When I was born, the storm ruined the ship, splintering the wood in such a way that a plank pierced through my mother. That is the only thing I know of her. 

“My father managed to save me. With the captain of the ship, who blamed my mother for the disaster as women bring bad luck, we escaped in a rowboat. To land, my father departed from the captain and set out for a straight life. It was hard, and eventually, he joined another crew. Stark’s father was the captain, and Tony and I grew up together on the ship. Only, I hid as a boy, which lasted for a long time until I started to develop. 

“One day, our ship was attacked by kingsmen. Both my father and Stark’s died. The captain and the first mate. The second mate was a man who hadn’t enjoyed mine or Stark’s presence. Both of us were kicked off as he took charge, despite the crew’s protests. And we were forced to live on little food and the shelter we were provided by kind people. 

“After a year, we set out together to try our luck. I hid my gender, and flew through the ranks of the ship to first mate in two years time. During an attack from an enemy ship, our captain died and I took over. My first order was to reveal that I was a woman, something easily done by flashing my breasts. There were surprised gasps and I told them if they had a problem, they needed to leave. 

“Most did. Except for Stark, and doctor Strange. He never wanted to be here in the first place, but he seemed not to want to leave, much less when I revealed my true identity. We renamed the ship, made changes and set out to find a crew. 

“Here I am today, still captain and with more respect than any other captain of the Seven Seas. Of course, this is leaving out every bloody aspect of it. If you ever need those, I’m not the one to ask.”

You fall into silence, one Loki does not wish to break. His heart beats loudly within its cage, and he tightens his grip around you as he places a kiss against your forehead. You sink closer into him, eyes closing as your hand traces across his chest. The sensations tingles Loki’s skin, and he lets a smile play on his lips as your breathing deepens and your hand falls limp at your side. 

With the energy he can muster, he shifts and picks you up. Carefully, he makes for your cabin, and pushes the door open with his foot. He puts you down on the bed, getting the cover from where it lies at the end of the bed. Loki lies down next to you, pulling you into his chest and letting his eyes close and the night floats away. 

 ---

The boy looks at him with wide eyes, mouth agape and fascination written across his face. “Really? You met other kings? Were you supposed to marry some other princess, too?” 

Loki nods, though the memory is not one he likes to remember. “I did,” he says eventually. “But I promise, princesses are not what they are told to be.” 

Peter nods understandingly. “Why?” he asks. The genuinity of his voice catches Loki off guard, but he still does his best to answer, without being too mean to the ones he’s met. 

“Most of them are rather spoiled, probably same as I was. And many of those I met were mean-spirited, all favoring my brother.” He chuckles slightly, though there is no happiness in the laugh. Loki shakes his head, and see you talking to Steve on the main deck, a smile on your face despite the teasing glimt in Steve’s eyes. “I only have one princess I like anyway.” 

The kid turns around, following Loki’s gaze to where you stand. He turns back, a fond smile on his face and nods. “You really like her, don’t you?”

Loki nods. 

“Mr. Stark told me you were her toy, but he also said you aren’t like the others. He said you’re special.” Peter nods as he talks, yet presses his lips together as if he said something he wasn’t supposed to. With the look of a kicked puppy, he meets Loki’s gaze. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” 

But Loki doesn’t mind. He knows there have been others. He knows you can’t only have him, at least not when he wasn’t traveling with you. Even if it does sting, he still asks. “Could you mention some of the others? What am I measured against?” He shoots the kid a smile, just to let him know he said nothing wrong. 

It has Peter light up. “We can’t talk too loud, because both Mr. Stark and Dr. Strange told me not to tell you anything, but you’re asking so I think it’s okay.” He leans forward, closer to Loki and lowers his voice to an almost whisper. “Most of the ones she’s been with, I don’t know the name of. They weren’t special, and she doesn’t take a lot of them on board, or really no one unless they already are here.” 

 “So, the ones you know she’s been with are part of the crew?”

Peter nods. “That’s why some aren’t too happy with you being here. You’re competition, though only to those that haven’t gotten the pleasure. But, anyways.” He waves his hands in the air, looking much more comfortable and casual compared to when they had first started to talk. “The one you’re really asking about is Mr. Rogers, right?”

Loki presses his lips together, but he still nods slowly, reluctantly. 

“I can tell you, yes. He’s probably been the most frequent.” Peter nods with a little grimace Loki supposes is him thinking it through. “I’ve also seen Mr. Barnes, and I believe I saw miss Romanoff once, but I’m not certain.”

“That’s alright. I didn’t ever expect anyone to tell me.” Loki smiles at Peter, though he knows it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Thank you. Now I know who I can confide in.”

Peter nods. “Yeah, well… there’s one more thing.” 

Loki cocks a brow. 

“The captain asked me to help you to your job. She said you have to find your place in the crew, and that you have to start where anyone new does.” 

The way Peter looks away from Loki, and shrinks in on himself, has an uneasy feeling travel through his veins. “What does the job entail?” 

“You’re gonna work in the bilge, emptying the water that fills it that doesn’t reach the pumps. It fills up every now and then, and there’s always someone going down there. It’s been me many times.” Peter hides away a little more, waiting for Loki’s reaction. 

However, the prince doesn’t give the one the boy expects. He sighs and looks back in your direction. You laugh, leaning against the railing and looking out over the rest of the crew. Steve talks beside you, and Loki knows you’re listening, but he can’t help but smile when your gaze meets his and your smile widens. His heart beats faster and faster, and he doesn’t care that he has to empty water from the ship. 

Anything is worth it with you by his side. 

 ---

Anything is not worth it with you by his side. 

Bare footed, pants rolled up to his thighs and shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows, Loki wades in the water. The bucket he holds stinks, the wood of it rotten. He’s been there for longer than he can count (he lost count somewhere after the first two bells). 

Outside, the sun settles down on the water’s horizon. He can feel the sweat wade down his back, and make his hair drape to his forehead. Even if he doesn’t regret coming along with you, he does regret not just being your lover. He would rather spend the days in your cabin, reading a book, or maybe get to know more people of your crew. 

Footsteps comes closer to where he is, and moments later he hears you call for him. He can hear the smile in your voice as you tell him he can stop and get some food. 

Moments later, he finally gets to sit down at a table with you. Salty meat and a bottle of rum he shares with you sits in front of him. The table is shared with Steve, you, Stark, Dr. Strange and Barnes. Loki wishes he could change Steve with Clint, but it’s not something he can control. 

“So, how was it, prince?” ask Stark with a smirk. 

Loki sighs. “Could be worse.” 

“Really now?” Steve studies him with a cock of his brows and a teasing glint in eyes. “Then you could do it again, right?”

You snicker at that. “How did you react after your first time, Rogers? Wasn’t it you who said the job was the easiest here and that if you were stuck doing it the rest of your life, that would be okay?” 

The table laughs at that, even Strange. Loki has the feeling the doctor might just be shy, or maybe not a people’s person. He makes a mental note to talk to the doctor alone sometime, ask him about what it’s like here. 

Steve’s face goes red, and he shoots you a glare. “I don’t have to, do I?” he asks, and though it sounds a little like a statement, Loki finds the question in it. You have the final say. 

“Right now I’m considering you two doing it together. The only ones except the kid that doesn’t complain about it, and the kid doesn’t for another reason than the two of you.” You press your lips together, taking a bite of your food. 

“Retaliation,” says Stark, “and against the first mate of all people.” He shakes his head and glances Steve’s way. “We already know it’s bad for you, but this has to make it even worse.”

The glare the first mate sends Stark’s way makes Loki realize the implication of the sentence. His gut churns at the thought, but he also has to suppress a smile knowing you’re his, and no one else’s.

permanent:  @devilbat @adefectivedetective @gamillian @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic @heartislubbingdubbing​

loki:  @iamverity​ @satanskatze​ @timetravelingsociopathicwalker​

seven days: @marvelc00kie35​ @southernhoney21​  @senpaiweird​ @britkane-shsl-librarian​ 

[extreme-technicality]

Im only messing with you 😘 while im here though could i have some fic recs puh-leaaase - 🍍

Ooh honey, you have no IDEA the can of worms you just opened :D (since this list is so long I’m gonna split it up into SFW Complete, NSFW Complete, SFW Ongoing, and NSFW Ongoing)

SFW Complete:

The Invisible Girl [sonamae]: OK SO it’s Hagakure-centric, with background Hagakure x Shouji and KiriBaku. My favorite part about this is that the romance is important, but not the focus. The focus of this oneshot is on the family she creates with Bakugou, Satou, Todoroki, Kirishima, and Tokoyami. Go read it, it’s great. BIG BROTHER BAKUGOU FTW!!!!!

Ground Zero [sonamae]: Speaking of Big Brother Bakugou, this is the next oneshot in the same series as the above one, but from Bakugou’s pov. Again, the romance is important but not a focus, and that’s so fucking refreshing and I love it so mUCH idk what else to tell you. Just go read these two. The rest of the series isn’t complete, but these two specific fics ARE, hence why they’re in the Complete section.

Lighting The Beacon [M3zzaTh3M3z]: This is one of the first bnha fics I’ve ever read, and I’m so glad this was my introduction to the fandom!! It’s a pretty fluffy oneshot, starting off with Kiri asking Baku out and Baku rejecting him because “who ever heard of a gay hero?” Aizawa hears about that (the basics, no details like names or anything), and things…start to change. Mic says he’s married to a man (its Aizawa), All Might comes out as pan, ace Midnight…and at the end, Bakugou asks Kirishima out very publicly. It’s so near and dear to my heart, and it honestly deserves more attention than it gets.

You’re only relevant until you’re older (they’re gonna talk about you over and over) [futurehearts]: Pro-Heroes Red Riot and Ground Zero are happily married and Baku has a reputation to slowly destroy :D (he’s soft, mainly for his husband, and he knows it…and now so does the rest of the world lmaooo).

Love Notes [PurplePersnickety]: Kirishima gets really, REALLY sappy love notes on his desk for a week or two and works to figure out who it is (spoiler alert, it’s Bakugou being a Soft Bitch). When Kiri asks him about it, he confesses everything and they date in secret for six months before telling the whole class (oneshot).

Sonder [Maplefudge]: I bet this bitch thought she wouldn’t get a shout-out well guess what you write good and there’s nothing you can do about it This is the first work of maple’s I ever read, and it’s perf <3 I’m love. It’s a look at the “totally platonic” (how much sarcasm can I add to two words?) Kiribaku from members of the class, over the course of 13 chapters. It’s full of fluff, useless mutual pining, obliviousness, and “platonic bro kisses”. Read it if you need to scream at some useless gays.

Anger Management [Julietwasanidiot]: The entire fandom is gearing up for S4 by writing hurt/comfort KiriBaku post-raid fics, and I am HERE for it. Because of when it’s set though, there’s going to be spoilers so if you’re anime-only you migt want to steer clear of this one. It’s got an ICONIC rice-and-anger line, though.

Stupid Mistakes [lemxnfox]: Kirishima and Bakugou got in a fight! They fight a lot, but this fight they’ve been fighting for six months and the class is #OverIt. They concoct a plan to lock the two of them in a room and force them to make up– and they DO. Side ShinKami and TodoDeku.

No More Fragments [Ischemia]: Canon-compliant…to a degree. Shinsou takes his place as the Superior Purple in Class A, gets himself a boyfriend (Kaminari) and a squad (the Bakusquad)…and loses it. Or does he???? Canon-typical violence, side Kiribaku, mystery plot.

Caught In My Own Web [anxioussaliorsoldier]: SHINSOU IS IN 1-A!!!!! And he fucks up when trying to use his capture weapon lmao. Kaminari finds him and they recreate the iconic Spider-Man kiss…and then Shinsou passes out from the blood rushing to his head. It’s cute guys.

Be Selfish For Me [A_Reflective_Projection]: WARNING– the entire thing is Aizawa asking 1-A to be careful as pro heroes, by taking them to a hero graveyard. It’s painful. It’s sad (especially when Aizawa brings up a classmate of his who died in their first year as a pro). It ends bittersweet, and there’s some good Dadzawa content in there. The most present ship is Erasermic, and that only really makes an appearance in the last chapter.

Closer [MikeWritesThings]: Fluffy Erasermic, canon universe, where Aizawa starts calling in to Mic’s radio show cuz he misses him. It’s sweet af ❤️❤️

Meaningless Holiday [dysonQueer]: It’s a sweet Valentine’s Day fic, canon-compliant, with established Erasermic for the soul. I highly recommend it if you’re having a rough day and you need some feel-good fluff

Come Back Toe Me [Milligramme]: Aged-up, Pro Hero fic where Kiri has a shit day heroing, but he isn’t physically hurt. Not until he breaks his toe on the coffee table, that is. He can’t stop laughing, and Bakugou can’t stop worrying about his dumbass boyfriend.

Kiss Me Through The Screen [Ischemia]: Aged-up fic with ShinKami as the main focus and some side KiriBaku, but…uh, most of the Bakusquad aren’t full-time Heroes. Kami dropped out of UA completely, and Shinsou never went in the first place. So, Kaminari is working at Jirou’s cafe and works as a SFW camboy at night, while Shinsou is a teacher and watches the stream nightly. Later there’s a plot around a stalker, again please keep yourself safe Pineapple Anon!!

If I Don’t Act… [SilentNorth]: This is gritty and painful, but don’t worry! There’s a happy ending :D (I rarely read/write/recc pure angst, you’re safe here my child). Kiri is a college dropout working two jobs, living with Mina as his roommate, and with a hero complex the size of Texas. Enter art student Bakugou, who can save himself thank you very much. Some mention of depression/attempted suicide, as well as slightly less than canon-typical violence, please keep yourself safe and skip it if that’s going to trigger you, Pineapple Anon.

Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all [theroyalsavage]: A Kiribaku “10 Things I Hate About You” AU where Todoroki asks Kirishima to fake-date Bakugou so he can date Midoriya. Everything is going smoothly until Kirishima accidentally falls in love *gasp*!!

The Skeletons Inside Of Us [firelord_zutara]: Erasermic, quirkless AU where Mic was the lead singer of Aizawa’s favorite local band in college. Aizawa has a crush on him, they lost touch after college, and they didn’t meet again…until their nephews (Aizawa adopted Midoriya, Shinsou is Mic’s sister’s kid) meet and by extension, the uncles. Background ShinKami and KiriBaku, written for EraserMic week (7 chapters).

Life’s a Drag(on) [PurplePersnickety]: FANTASY AU!!! You know, the Fantasy AU from the third ending. But altered, juuuuuust slightly. Bakugou lives in(? ish) a village and helps a dragon when it’s hurt. A day or so later, a (hot) new guy comes to town named Kirishima, and the dragon keeps coming around. Shenaniganery follows. :DDD

Space Dust [PurplePersnickety]: Do you like Star Wars, Star Trek, Firefly, and/or Men In Black? Then you’re gonna fuckin LOVE this :DDD It’s got half-alien Kirishima, cyborg Bakugou, mention of a larger universe outside of the planet (outside of the oneshot too, lbr). It is a oneshot though, even if it is a long one, with canon/typical violence and mention of kidnapping and child experimentation. Please put your mental health and well-being above everything else and skip it if it’s gonna trigger you!!!

Achromatopsia [PurplePersnickety]: DID SOMEBODY SAY SOULMATE AU???? No? Well hAVE ONE ANYWAY!!! Kiribaku soulmate AU (oneshot), where you only see in one color until you touch your soulmate for the first time. Fun fact, achromatopsia is the complete inability to see any color!! I’m sure that’s not gonna have any bearing on the story whatsoever…

NSFW Complete:

A Cast for your Heart [KTG]: Heads up, this is LONG. 90 chapters, 268k, it’s magic and sex and drAGONS and angst and almost-dying!! The fantasy system is completely original, set in modern times, and the OCs??? Don’t get me STARTED. Kiribaku, Tododeku, and Seromina are the bnha ships present as well as a lot of OCxOC ships. There’s also a sequel set to come out this month (July 2019)!!

Long Time Coming [Madam_Muffins]: I’ve probably recc’ed this before, but I just. I just love this one so much, ok? It’s massive Kiribaku slow burn, outlining what might happen if Bakugou is just a little bit more emotionally constipated. Baku fucks up, gets help, he and Kiri get together (and fuck a little), and there’s elements of the Reincarnation and Fantasy AUs in there towards the end!! Go read it, madammuffins is my amazing tumblr mom and I love her to bits.

SFW Ongoing:

Engraved In Your Mind [Hejter]: FACEBLIND BAKUGOU KATSUKI!!! It’s canon-compliant, except for that little detail, but she writes it so WELL that now I can’t look at canon!Bakugou without thinking that he’s faceblind. Kiri finds out and starts working to build trust with Bakugou and help him on his path to becoming the top hero, and it’s GREAT. Slowburn Kiribaku. Like,,,SLOW.

Define: Oblivious [PurplePersnickety]: I bet you thought I was done with the Purple reccs. I’m never going to be done reccing Purple. Deal with it. I mentioned, in the summary for Love Notes, that there was a six month time skip? This is what happens in those six months. SeroKami and MomoJirou are side ships in this one.

The Right Thing [TuesdayTerrible]: Established Kiribaku where they’re graduated from UA, and living together, and being pro heroes…and then one day Baku finds a little girl who tried to kill herself cuz she was quirkless. Needless to say, this strikes a chord in Bakugou (cuz…yknow, he kinda told Midoriya to kill himself in like episode one and then it was never addressed again). He can’t stop thinking about her, and while we haven’t gotten there YET it looks like it’s gonna end with him and Kirishima adopting her and Bakugou apologizing for the bullshit he put Mido through. There is mention of a suicide attempt (clearly), skip it if that’s gonna trigger you!!!

Hands Off! [PullingAllMighters]: Much like Kiss Me Through The Screen, Hands Off! is a non-canon compliant aged-up AU where not everyone is a full-time hero. Kiri is, Kami and Sero are his sidekicks, Ochako is in a different agency, and everyone else is doing Other Shit. Bakugou hasn’t revealed his full backstory yet, but it looks like he was a Pro Hero until a year or so ago when something bad happened and now he’s got PTSD. His old apartment building burned down so he’s living in Ochako, Momo, Jirou, and Mina’s guesthouse until he finds a job and another place to live. This has a fresh take on the hero system, and I really really enjoy it so far!! There is, however, a fairly detailed scene of Bakugou being triggered so if reading that would trigger you, please don’t!! Keep yourself safe, Pineapple Anon!!! Endgame Kiribaku

Blood of my Hand [PurplePersnickety]: Is it obvious yet that I LOVE purple’s writing??? This, I believe, was the gateway work, and I’ve dived headfirst in and not looked back. Fantasy AU, slowburn Kiribaku, and it’s. I can’t even sum it up. There’s too much. It’s too good. Game of Thrones WISHES it could be what BomH is. There’s mention of slavery and past child abuse, please skip that if it’s going to trigger you!!

A Boy and his Dragon [VanHan]: Oh look, another fantasy AU. Have you figured out that I have a type yet? Kiribaku but the Kiribaku hasn’t really happened yet, cuz Bakugou is a literal child who got kidnapped and is probably gonna get sold. He doesn’t even know Kirishima is Kirishima, he just knows him as the cool dragon in the cage. This one just barely makes the SFW list, because there’s no explicit mention of fucking, but there’s a really really gross pedophile that shows up fairly early on and hasn’t died yet. There’s also graphic depictions of violence in the first chapter, and once you combine those two things I would absolutely understand if you decided to give this one a pass, too.

Everglow [Maplefudge]: ANOTHER fantasy AU?!?! In MY fic recc list?? It’s more likely than you think. This one just started, and it’s got that enemies-to-lovers shit going on. Dragons plus my favorite tropes = FUCK YEAH!!!

Crimson [Crocodillia]: I bet you thought I was done with the fantasy AU reccs, didn’t you? Well, HAVE ANOTHER!!! This one has strong HTTYD vibes, and I’ve literally never seen anyone try that before with these characters!! So far there’s only two chapters, but I am HOOKED and if you like HTTYD…you’re gonna like this, too.

Becoming Human [FoolishFortuna]: Demon!Bakugou becomes Human!Bakugou when he refuses to take a kid’s soul. I think we’re three chapters in and he just got to earth and met Kirishima, as well as a few holy people (Midoriya, Ochako, Iida, and I believe Tetsu). Now he gotta find his daughter and keep her safe. Kiribaku with some fairly graphic descriptions of torture and cannibalism in the second chapter, don’t read it if that’s gonna trigger you!! Also he pretty brutally rips apart the girl’s abusive parents.

Surviving for Second Chances [SilentNorth]: TWEWY Kiribaku AU!!! There’s some differences between the original game and the fic, for pretty obvious reasons (medium, objective, and character differences being a few), but this got me to FINALLY watch a playthrough of the game cuz I’m too broke to go and buy it myself!! Kirishima as Neku and Bakugou as Joshua, plus Mina as Shiki and TodoDeku as Rhyme and Beat. Canon-typical violence, and we just finished up Week 1!!

Love And Other Allergens [thefrailtyofgenius]: A Quirkless AU where Todoroki is a lawyer with a flower shop underneath his apartment. Todo finds out he’s allergic to one of the plants, buys a different bouquet every week instead of, yknow, asking for help like a normal human being (I say, knowing damn well I’d just buy allergy medication and not even try to figure out what I’m allergic TO), and accidentally falls in love with the cute (and absolutely fucking ripped) flower boy (Midoriya lmao). It’s LONG. The TodoDeku is extremely slowburn, and there’s a fuckload of side ships. An incomplete list: Erasermic, Kiribaku, ShinIida (Shinsou and Iida), and MomoJirou. Bonus Endeavor’s Bad Parenting, Midoriya Hisashi’s Bad Parenting, and both of those assholes getting locked up forever :D (I’m so serious about the length tho, it’s like 40 chapters or something).

NSFW Ongoing:

Mixing Signals [Shippeh]: Kiribaku aged-up, but they’ve tried to date multiple times and every time Bakugou fucked it up. Every time they broke up, they pretended like they’d never tried in the first place (which…oW), but this time. THIS time, Bakugou swears he’s gonna make them work.

Heartbeat Thunder [Shippeh]: This is one of the few ABO fics I’ll recc, because it’s not just “ooh heat sex fun times”. This has THOUGHT put into it. They’re confused kids goddamnit, let them be confused!!! Basically Kiri doesn’t ever want to rut so he’s suppressing everything about being an alpha, while Bakugou thinks that trying to hide from your secondary gender is stupid. They do fuck tho, which is why the fic is in NSFW Ongoing.

Take a Chance On Me [FanficIsMyThing]: The other ABO fic I’ll happily recc. Kiri is an alpha which lets him be a hero, while Baku is an omega so he’s gotta be a vigilante until the laws get changed. They run into each other on patrol a few times, Baku helps Kiri and crew out a few times, and every time Kirishima *mysteriously* fails to catch the vigilante Chemical X. They haven’t actually fucked yet, but there’s been enough sexy times to put this squarely in NSFW territory. And it’s not just sex!! I don’t wanna spoil, but it’s good I swear.

Opposed to the Typical [Heronfem]: A model/fashion designer AU featuring HoH!Bakugou, model!Bakugou and designer!Kirishima, as well as a metric shitload of others. Basically Kiri is an intern with Fatgum who gets called to help another studio with their fitting, gets assigned to Bakugou, figures out he’s HoH and handles it like a champ. Because he does it so well, whenever Bakugou needs to get his measurements taken again, they immediately call for Kirishima. And ofc they gonna fall in love :3c But its more complicated than that, and I don’t wanna give too much away, but make sure that you pay attention to any trigger warnings at the start of the chapters!!!

[pointy-hat-witch]

Fic where kirishima is a French celebrity and bakugo is his bodyguard (lol idk if that’s weird). This is for the fic rec thingy :)

Requests are still open! 

Nothing weird about that!! Thank you so much!!

Title: Words unspokenSeries: Boku no Hero AcademiaPairing: Kirishima Eijirou/Bakugou KatsukiWordcount: 2809Summary: Bakugou was tasked to be the bodyguard of a French celebrity, he had never heard of. Well, what could go wrong if they both couldn’t understand them because of their languages?

Bakugou groaned inwardly for the sixth time in the last ten minutes or so, contemplating all of his life choices that had led him to be in this position. He was standing with the back to the wall, about a meter away from the person who crashed into his world without warning, crumbling everything he worked for so hard. And he didn’t even care. What the actual fuck.

-- 5 days earlier –

Lounging on his couch, Bakugou enjoyed one of his rare free Sundays. Usually, Bakugou had to work on weekends, especially on weekends, but now, after about eight weeks in a row, he finally had a day off and he was adamant, to not do anything. Maybe going to the gym later on, but that didn’t count as actual work or something.

Nursing a glass of orange juice in one hand and a sports magazine in the other, his phone started to ring. After the third ring, Bakugou was a patient man, thank you very much, he grabbed it after slamming down his drink and paper.

“What?!” If someone had his number, that meant they knew him well enough he wasn’t one for pleasantries and he wouldn’t start now.

“Jolly, aren’t we?” came the gruff voice of Aizawa, his agent if he could call it that. Bakugou grunted in response and fell back into his couch again. Aizawa calling meant a new job, for nothing else he would call.

“Tomorrow afternoon, 2 pm, a French celebrity is coming to Japan, rather spontaneously. They’re staying for a week or two and their parents asked for someone professional. They themselves are not pleased with it, so don’t start a fight with them.”

Bakugou listened and soaked up the information. Great, didn’t French people have the reputation to be arrogant? Not that he was one to judge. But at least, his arrogance wasn’t baseless and normally, if a celebrity claimed they didn’t need protection they’re especially in need of it.

“What’s their name?” Bakugou pulled up his laptop, his fingers already itching to make his own research.

“Kirishima Eijirou.”

“Huh? Japanese?”

“Well, their parents are but they were born and raised in France. I don’t think they speak Japanese.”

“Fantastic.” Sarcasm oozed from him. There was hope they wouldn’t have too much of an accent. “Send me an email with the rest.” With another grunt, Bakugou disconnected to start his research.

Kirishima Eijirou, 26, actor and model and a hotshot in Europe. With only 8 years of age they had their first supportive role in a fantasy drama, with 10 they were the leading role. 7 years later, a model company got him under contract and ever since the star was rising. There was a small article about their trip to Japan, in which they stated, they wanted to finally see the homeland of their parents.

Great, if they want a fucking tour guide, they could go fuck themselves. Bakugou’s mood soured by the minute, already dreading the next two weeks. Hopefully, they would find Japan not nearly as interesting as they hoped and fly back to their lovely European country.

A pop-up window signaled an incoming mail, which Bakugou opened immediately. He scanned the usual information about the client, nothing he didn’t find out himself earlier. They should drop off at Narita Airport at 1:58 pm and then there was the address of their hotel they would be staying. Bakugou scrolled down, not interested in all the small details, he was just there to keep them safe after all, until he reached the payment section. He had to make a double-take, staring at the quite hefty sum. Are all European celebrities loaded? This was as much as he got for the past six months, holy fuck. For that, he could put up with this Kirishima.

Attached was a photo of them, and Bakugou realized he didn’t look up this fine detail. He opened the file, breath hitching in his throat. Hotshot became a whole new meaning. Bakugou didn’t question their model career, at least not anymore. Kirishima’s red eyes were wide open, crinkling at the corners by the big smile and Bakugou felt as if they looked right into his soul. The red hair was bright like a halo around their head, sharp teeth giving their innocent-looking smile a dangerous note.

It was only a headshot but judging by their neck and shoulders, Bakugou didn’t think they needed protection at all. If these muscles weren’t all for show, at least. But something about how Kirishima carried themselves told him; they weren’t.

The next day went around too fast. After his initial shock, Bakugou pushed down all his surprise and fascination, it was just a job like every other. Waiting at the airport in his crisp black suit, well fitted, accompanied with a pair of dark sunglasses and a stun gun in his holster, Bakugou held up a small sign with Kirishima’s name on it. It didn’t take long until Kirishima arrived, a big group of people in their tow.

They smiled at everyone they locked eyes with, waving and scribbling on photographs, magazines and whatever else was pushed into their face. Just watching this, Bakugou’s eyes twitched. Kirishima looked around and, finally, their eyes landed on Bakugou. Their smile grew a little more, and after waving one last time at their fans, they jogged over.

Despite being a model and being able to pull off a lot of different looks, Bakugou did some more research, sue him, Kirishima looked like a fashion disaster. Did they think they were in Hawaii? A big, colored Hawaiian shirt over a black muscle shirt and deep green Bermuda shorts decorated their body, completed by a pair of red crocs. Holy fucking hell.

Bakugou steeled his nerves when Kirishima walked up to them.

“Bonjour!” The lips split into another grin. “Bakugou Katsuki?”

Bakugou nodded curtly, turning around without another word.

“Attendez!” Kirishima yelped but caught up to him in no time. Ignoring the inquisitive eyes on him, Bakugou led them outside to their car. He didn’t make any move to help Kirishima with their bags or, god beware, holding their door open and just sat down on the driver’s seat. After a few seconds, the trunk was opened and closed, Kirishima sat down next to him.

“Fait, merci. Savez-vous où aller?” They kneaded their fingers in their lap slightly, but Bakugou just put down his glasses and maneuvered their car out of the parking lot. Kirishima hummed next to him but didn’t ask any more questions, thank god.

The drive was short and silent. Bakugou parked right in front of the hotel, a staff member came up to park the car in their underground garage. Ignoring Kirishima’s luggage again, Bakugou just waited for Kirishima to walk up. Bakugou wasn’t here to babysit and do things for him, he just needed to put his life on the line when the situation arose. Kirishima shot him a grin and walked up to the reception, waving dismissively at the page who was grabbing for their luggage.

“Bonjour, mademoiselle. Une réservation sur le nom Kirishima Eijirou.“

„Bien sûr, un moment, s’il vous plaît.“ Came the immediate answer from the receptionist. Huh, did they had to speak French in hotels nowadays? Bakugou pushed down his curiosity and finally did his job, he was paid for it after all. Ignoring any further chit chat between them, Bakugou was on the lookout for any abnormalities. Even if this trip was spontaneous, one or two days was enough for some people to come up with the craziest ideas.

Without incident, however, they got up to Kirishima’s room. They fell down on the bed with an exclamation, laying on it like a starfish. Bakugou used this time to walk through all the rooms, inspecting if there would be any other people with them, for whatever reason. It took him about ten minutes since there were three bedrooms (they were alone, why did they need so many bedrooms?), two bathrooms, two spacious living rooms, and even a kitchen.

After his inspection, Bakugou walked up to Kirishima again who now sat on the couch in one of the living rooms, switching through the TV channels.

“Listen up”, Bakugou crossed his arms, speaking English a little slower than usual, “I don’t know how you do this stuff usually, but I have some rules your better follow if you…” Bakugou petered out as he saw Kirishima’s wide eyes on him, their eyebrows slowly knitting in confusion as he spoke on.

“Do you… even understand me?” Bakugou huffed incredulously. This must be a fucking joke.

“Uhm”, Kirishima scratched their nose, “Vous ne parlez pas français?”

Bakugou furrowed his eyebrows, a growl formed in the back of his throat. “Godfuckingdamnit.”

Laughter boomed out of Kirishima. Curses seemed to be universal at least, though, Bakugou wasn’t in the mood to laugh. How should he work with someone with whom he couldn’t communicate?

The rest of the day and the day after, Bakugou felt like all of Japan got a memo he didn’t receive. Was French suddenly the second language for everyone or why was every Tom, Dick, and Harry able to speak French fluently? Wherever they went, museums, parks, restaurants, shops, everyone didn’t hesitate to answer Kirishima in their native language and it drove Bakugou mad. He was the one who was the most prepared of them all, always. But even he couldn’t learn a language in one or two days so how come that everyone suddenly could?!

Bakugou was fuming. It took all of his professionalism to stay focused and do his job properly. At least, Kirishima didn’t try too often to strike up a conversation but they warmed up to him which Bakugou didn’t appreciate. They tried to coax him to watch TV with them or offered them a seat at the restaurants they went, but Bakugou either glared at them until they relented or plain up ignored them.

Maybe because they couldn’t communicate, Bakugou was concentrating more on Kirishima’s action, their gestures, and mimics, to assess the situation and to intervene if necessary. On the third day, Bakugou begrudgingly had to admit, he could easily tell when Kirishima was genuinely smiling at someone or was faking it and was polite; he could estimate when Kirishima was done somewhere when their interest dropped and for whatever reason, Bakugou then subtly steered them somewhere else.

On the fourth day, Bakugou realized, Kirishima did something similar. Whenever they were in open spaces or too crowded spaces, Bakugou got fidgety after a certain amount of time. Especially in these places something could happen because there were so many potential culprits and too many directions someone could come from and it took a toll on Bakugou’s concentration. So, whenever he was almost at his limit, Kirishima decided to take a break and go somewhere quiet.

This is how he found himself in a backroom of a fancy restaurant, Kirishima meeting with some famous family for dinner because their children were big fans of them, taking deep, deliberated breaths to calm himself down. Even as he noticed Kirishima’s care? Indulgence? Bakugou didn’t mind. Somehow, he enjoyed their non-verbal communication.

A little absent-minded, Bakugou stared at the twins in front of Kirishima who stared at them as if they were a deity coming down to earth specifically just for them and Bakugou had to suppress a snort. Teenage fans were hilarious. If they knew, Kirishima snored horribly or that they couldn’t cook for shit or they nibbled on all their pens and pencils in concentration, they sure wouldn’t be so hung up on them.

It was only a split second, but Bakugou was nothing if not the best at what he did, so everything happened so fast and in slow-motion at the same time. His eyes saw the glint of the knife in one of the twin sisters hand, his body already tensing up, so when she suddenly shot up on her chair, he had his hand already at Kirishima’s collar to pull them back, pushing them behind him and grabbing the wrist of the girl with his other hand. In one swift movement, he pushed her down on the table, twisting her arm on her back and making her drop the knife.

“What in the ever-loving fuck was that?” Bakugou growled at her. Everyone was silent for a few seconds until the girl started crying. Her parents grabbed at Bakugou, screaming to release her.

“What in the world are you doing to my daughter?! Get your filthy hands off of her!” The mother almost screeched in his ears.

“Are you fucking blind?!” Bakugou snapped back. “Didn’t you see how she attacked them?!”

“She didn’t do anything! You suddenly attacked her!” The father screamed at him, pulling back a fist to throw at Bakugou. Before it could even get near him, Kirishima pulled the man back with a dangerous smile.

“I’m sorry, I must ask of you to not assault my bodyguard when he is just doing his job.”

Bakugou just barely registered that he understood Kirishima as he spoke perfect Japanese when the man jerked his arm free, obviously, Kirishima let him, and grabbed his daughter from off the table and pushed his family out of the room without any further comment.

There was a beat of silence as the door fell shut behind them, leaving Kirishima and Bakugou staring at it as if this couldn’t just have happened.

“What the actual fuck?”

“You tell me.”

Bakugou twirled around. “You!”

“I?” Kirishima blinked. “Oh yeah, you do speak Japanese!” Apparently it was hilarious enough, to laugh.

“You fucker! You hair-for-brains fucking stupid shit speak Japanese and didn’t tell me?!”

Kirishima wiped away a tear from their eye as they caught their breath. “I- I-“, they huffed. “I thought you could only speak English! You just started with that and I thought, you know”, they shrugged helplessly, still giggling.

“Don’t you … fuck … stop laughing! You almost got killed! There is nothing funny about this situation!” Bakugou fisted his hands, gritting his teeth.

“Oh? Did I? I thought you had the situation pretty much under control.” Kirishima finally huffed out the rest of his laughter, lazily resting their hands on their hips. Their eyes laid on Bakugou with utmost confidence that their life was in good hands. Bakugou felt his face heat up and coughed.

“Of fucking course, I did!” The grunted, pushing the chairs back at the table just so his hands had something to do.

“Well, so, there was nothing to worry about.” Kirishima shrugged. “It’s a shame for the food, though.” The pushed the plates further onto the table, so they didn’t tip over, but most of the food was already spilled on the tablecloth.

“That isn’t …” Bakugou snapped his mouth shut in frustration. How could Kirishima be so calm? “Just … let’s get you back to the hotel.”

“You got it!”

How didn’t he realize that Kirishima did, in fact, speak Japanese? That was ridiculous. So many stupid situations could have been avoided. Angry at himself and Kirishima, Bakugou sat down in the car and closed the door with too much force.

“Hey, Bakugou?”

“What, shitty hair?” Bakugou growled, earning a low snicker.

“Thanks for saving my life.”

Bakugou’s head whirled around to Kirishima who looked at him warmly, a small smile that illuminated the small compartment of the car like the sun, nevertheless.

“You’re … fuck.” Bakugou started the car, fixing his eyes on the road so he wouldn’t stare at Kirishima again, causing an accident, worst-case scenario. Their drive was short and silent, but not uncomfortable. They walked up to Kirishima’s room, Bakugou had taken the liberty to live in one of the other bedrooms since they wouldn’t be used otherwise, so he could stay near his client at any given time.

After changing into something more comfortable, Bakugou stood in the kitchen, rummaging through the cupboards and the fridge.

“What are you doing?” Kirishima sat down on one of the stools, leaning over the kitchen island with one hand at their chin.

“Dinner.” Bakugou grunted. Kirishima’s mouth formed a soundless ‘o’ and then split into another grin.

“Sure thing. You need any help?”

“Not from you, fuckmunch. You’ll just set the kitchen on fire.”

“It was just one and just a little bit of plastic!” Kirishima cried out, throwing their arms up.

“You were making a bowl of cereal!”

“Well, yeah?!”

They stared at each other until they both snorted. Bakugou turned back around to the stove, pouring oil into it and getting the steak ready. Kirishima didn’t stop smiling as they watched Bakugou cooking in comfortable silence.

And when Kirishima stayed a few weeks longer in Japan and Bakugou came with him to France afterward, well, it wasn’t anybody’s fucking business, was it?

[faejilly]

i am for you (7/?)

holy shit you guys, it’s Friday? When did that happen. Like. I finished and then almost forgot to post. It’s been. idk. a week. the working title of this chapter was “my fic needs more ladies” and is also a return to epistolary. (hopefully second-hand brunch is still entertaining. I love Cat.) 

series tag / ao3

[cat]: you two have the worst timing

[dot]: what? are you? IT'S TOO EARLY

[tessa]: why are you yelling at us? Shouldn't you be on your way to brunch?

[cat]: I need reinforcements! Company!

[tessa]: well you can talk to the ALA about their conference schedules then, not us

[cat]: but some sanity would be nice

[dot]: are the boys being especially *boys* at you?

[cat]: yes [cat]: also Magnus is overly infatuated with someone, even for him [cat]: and he only met the guy last night! Sort of? I think [cat]: I'm freaking out, but Ragnor is being very calm about it all, which is weird and not helping

[tessa]: Ragnor's always been a hopeless romantic, of course he's happy for Magnus.

[cat]: but he USUALLY thinks Magnus has terrible taste and no self-preservation instinct

[dot]: I am almost personally offended by that first part considering how I met the rest of you, but he's not wrong on that second part so I suppose I'll let it be

[cat]: Magnus was so nervous I went with him to get a mani/pedi to help him calm down and he was practically vibrating in his chair, they had the hardest time getting his nails finished.

[tessa]: Magnus was nervous before he met the guy? That's... unusual.

[cat]: they'd been chatting via email, and it was their first in person thing. I have no idea what I should expect, or what I should say at brunch [cat]: because I'm going to have to ask, right?

[tessa]: you won't have to ask, you'll know how it went as soon as you see him

[cat]: you would think that, but Raphael's already preparing to murder the guy just in case, and Ragnor's being *mysterious* and I need back-up and you two are in the wrong time zone

[tessa]: sorry?

[cat]: are you though?

[dot]: I am, I want to watch! It will either be horrifyingly entertaining, or it'll be actual good news and Magnus being happy

[tessa]: which is always nice to see

[cat]: maybe I'll bring some extra asti. Either for celebrating or commiserating?

[dot]: now I really wish I was there

[tessa]: so do I. Keep us updated.

[dot]: take pictures! Lots of pictures.

*** ***

[cat]: I hope they get married [cat]: possibly tomorrow [cat]: no wait, we have to wait for you to get back [cat]: next weekend?

[dot]: wtf cat

[tessa]: kl;'/.

[dot]: I'll have you know Tessa just choked on her tea and is a really improbable shade of red right now

[cat]: sorry [cat]: not about that, but I don't have any pictures [cat]: Magnus' boy was embarrassed enough when we got there because they'd clearly lost track of time and he had to find his shirt after we walked in and he blushed half way down his chest

[dot]: oh my 😅 [dot]: where was his shirt?

[cat]: half off the footstool by the couch, pretty sure it got thrown over someone's shoulder last night

[dot]: did Magnus look sad when he put it back on?

[cat]: I was too sad when he put it back on to tell

[dot]: Tessa just choked again. I think you broke her. She doesn't know how to drink anymore.

[cat]: Raphael responded to the shirt fiasco via That Glare™

[dot]: I am so glad I don't get That Glare™ anymore

[cat]: I could tell he was thinking this guy was just using Magnus for a good time last night and trying to decide how thoroughly to murder him. [cat]: But the boy glared back, and I think they had some sort of secret conversation via scowling eyebrows and rolled eyes? Because afterwards they were perfectly civil to each other.

[dot]: what. how.

[tessa]: stop I can't breathe

[dot]: don't stop I wanna see if she turns any other silly colors

[cat]: oh, I can't stop. I am nowhere near being able to stop

[dot]: yay!

[cat]: Ragnor said "it was nice to see him again" and didn't tease him about the shirt thing and actually engaged in small talk about someone they both knew for like five minutes

[tessa]: Ragnor can be nice for Magnus' sake. Occasionally. With a little prodding.

[cat]: He did it on his own! He started the conversation!

[tessa]: no

[cat]: apparently a friend of Alec's (that's the boy, sorry, I am going all out of order aren't I? Magnus calls him *Alexander* but he introduced himself to us as Alec so I'm pretty sure no one else is ever going to get to call him that) [cat]: where was I?

[dot]: I have no idea but don't ever stop

[tessa]: there's a panel starting in fifteen minutes so you'll have to stop eventually but not quite yet

[dot]: whatever, this is better than a panel

[tessa]: not when I'm IN IT

[dot]: I suppose?

[tessa]: not all of us are just here for the shopping and networking

[cat]: ANYWAY [cat]: Friend! Of Alec's! Who apparently needed a leave of absence for a semester but she was past the cut-off date and Alec was personally going to all her professors to get exceptions for her? And Ragnor helped? So he was asking Alec how she was doing now. He remembered her name and everything, he didn't just go by her hair color or a paper she wrote, he used her NAME. Bri? Brand—no. Something with a B at least.

[tessa]: sounds like the friend's pretty remarkable too if Ragnor remembered them both

[cat]: and he's apparently hired Alec for the summer work-study the Classics department does FOUR YEARS IN A ROW, even though he's not even an undergrad anymore so Ragnor had to fill out extra paperwork FROM THE DEAN'S OFFICE

[tessa]: Ragnor voluntarily subjected himself to more Aldertree? Isn't the summer program mostly for putting a student between him and the Dean so he has *less* Aldertree?

[dot]: I know you're generally very honest, and if for some reason you aren't, you're a better liar than this [dot]: but I'm still having trouble believing you

[cat]: I was there and I almost don't believe me

[tessa]: So Ragnor already liked him. And has known him for over four years. At some point Magnus is going to be very upset that he never introduced them.

[cat]: Magnus started to do that wide-eyed hiss thing that he does right before he verbally eviscerates you, you know the thing

[dot]: ouch.

[tessa]: How much blood was shed?

[cat]: None. [cat]: Alec leaned in and said something stupidly sappy like, *but we've met now* and Magnus just... smiled and leaned against his shoulder? That was it.

[dot]: he's a Magnus-Whisperer!

[tessa]: how much did you all drink for Magnus to be that relaxed at a meet-the-boyfriend thing?

[cat]: not a drop. We were all too busy being shocked to even open anything

[dot]: but. Brunch! Mimosas!

[cat]: Gorgeous boy over six feet tall who blushes!

[tessa]: wow [tessa]: I am really really sad about the lack of pictures now. Not as sad as Dot, but still sad

[cat]: And then! He left before we did because he had to go home and change before a thing at a bookstore this afternoon [cat]: like a volunteering thing, not even getting paid, he's just *helping*

[dot]: which bookstore?

[cat]: uh. The one with the name that's actually some names rather than a book pun of some sort, makes it sound all classy? Starts with ffff... fuck it I can't remember.

[dot]: Fray & Garroway? That makes sense... they hire a lot of short-term students and have like twenty children who all show up at events

[cat]: Magnus did mention something about an improbable number of siblings

[dot]: probably one of them, then

[tessa]: how do you know so much about a random bookstore?

[dot]: Elliot used to go to estate sales with Jocelyn Fray before she died. [dot]: He's got a couple pictures of them in his office, grinning over some find or another. He said she had a knack, you know? Always spotted the best stuff. She was mostly going for stuff for herself or fixtures rather than stuff to sell, but they clearly had a good time hunting together. [dot]: He still refers people over there if they're looking for books beyond what we've currently got in stock, or if they're fine with later editions, since we usually just keep firsts or seconds. Luke sends people our way periodically too.

[tessa]: Jocelyn, I haven't thought about her in ages, that must have been what, over ten years ago?

[dot]: must be. Hell, her daughter Clary's probably old enough to drink now. That's a weird thought.

[tessa]: because we're so ancient in comparison? 🙄 [tessa]: regardless, I do have to get going, and put my phone in silent. Don't go too crazy without me

[dot]: too late!

[cat]: nah, I think that's most of it [cat]: for now, at least. I cannot wait until you two meet him next week

[dot]: if you think I'm going to wait until next week to find out more you do not know me as well as I thought you did

[cat]: good luck 😉

[dot]: I don't need luck, kitty cat, you know that

[cat]: you're much more impetuously curious than I am, why am I the kitty cat?

[dot]: you have a much nicer purr?

[cat]: you are ridiculous

[dot]: and proud of it. If you find anything else out, do let us know.

[cat]: I think I'm afraid of what you'd do with it... you could always try Ragnor?

[dot]: you know that's useless, he enjoys knowing shit no one else does WAY too much to share [dot]: he's going to be lording his Alec knowledge over us for ages

[cat]: not too long. He enjoys sharing exasperated looks about Magnus even more

[dot]: ha. True. [dot]: But that won't help me before I get back

[cat]: you're back TOMORROW

[dot]: late tomorrow! That's two whole days! At least!

[cat]: you're exhausting

[dot]: 😘

[cat]: well it's not like I could slow you down, much less stop you. Have fun investigating?

[dot]: will do.