#start a fish farming business in India

[ideasgalaxy53]

Starting as an Aquaponics Farmer in India: A Step-by-Step Guide

Starting an aquaponics farm in India as a part-time venture can be rewarding both financially and environmentally. With the right planning and dedication, you can create a sustainable business that yields significant returns on investment. Whether you’re a hobbyist or an entrepreneur, aquaponics offers a path to a greener and more profitable future.

[twnenglish]

6 Most Benefitted Livestock Farming Business to Start In 2022

Animals are bred and domesticated in the process of livestock production. Meat, skin, wool, milk, and other products are obtained by farmers from this source. For farmers, livestock is a good source of revenue. Livestock or farm animals have been a good source of revenue for humans since prehistoric times. And, now, both large-scale and small-scale cattle farming are unquestionably profitable businesses. Dairy, poultry, and fish farming are three of the most frequent livestock businesses, so we've come up with another six demandable animal farming business ideas to assist you.

Mud Crab Farming

Mud Crab is well-known due to the high level of consumer interest in the product. Mud crabs are widely consumed in Asian nations such as India, Bangladesh, the Philippines, and Thailand. Mud crabs are mostly produced in these countries. Crab farming has several advantages, including a low labor cost and the ability to expand quickly. In addition, the flesh of mud crabs is tasty. You may simply start and maintain a mud crab farming business with very little capital.

Pearl Farming

The farmed pearl industry is attracting a lot of attention right now. Currently, farmed pearls account for nearly all the pearls on the market. Pearls can be created artificially on a pearl farm. Pearl farming is a successful livestock venture, but it takes extensive planning.

Pig Farming

Another profitable animal business idea is pig farming. More than 1 billion pigs are slaughtered each year throughout the world. The top pig exporting countries are the United States, the European Union, and Canada. Pigs are primarily used for human consumption, but their skin, fat, and other parts are also used in cosmetics, processed foods, and medicine. Natural pig feed has a sizable market, and many farmers are interested in raising pigs that are as solid as possible.

To Read This Full ARTICLE, Click Here

[bizzlnaebizzcard12]

How to transform your NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL fish in KOSAMBA. From zero to hero in Bizzlane

It is clear that there are many ideas for a fish farm manager in Gujarat in Bizzlane. The article has provided some useful tips and strategies for a successful fish farming business.National, International frish in KOSAMBA Gujarat is a great place to start a fish farm due to the abundance of water resources. A manager should consider the location, type of fish, and market before starting a fish farm. With proper management, a fish farm can be a profitable and sustainable business. add= BADSHAH FISH CENTER JUNA BAZAR, FISH MARKET, KOSAMBA, HOME- 3-108, 394120 - Surat Gujarat 394120 mo no 9574533534 #fish farming business , #fish farm minecraft bedrock , #fish farm bedrock , #fish farm , #fish farm minecraft , #fish farming in india , #fish farm minecraft java , #fish farming at home

[himvalleytrout]

Trout Fish Farming in India | Profitable Trout Fish Farming Business- Himvalley Trout

Explore trout fish farming in India with Himvalleytrout. Start your profitable trout fish farming business today. Get information on trout fish price and sustainable farming practices. Contact us at +91-9548751742, +91-9412971414

[shrivenkateshwarauniversity2021]

Shri Venkateshwara University organized a seminar on the topic Emerging Opportunities in the Agriculture sector.  

Shri Venkateshwara University/ Institute organized a 2 day seminar on the topic Emerging Opportunities in Agriculture sector.  

In the seminar, Agriculture scientists elaborated ways to double farmer’s income by discarding old methods & adopt techniques that will transform agriculture into industrial farming.

The Group Chairman Dr Sudhir Giri, Chief Guest Prof A. K. Singh, former Sr. Scientist Israel Agriculture dept., Pro Chancellor Dr Rajiv Tyagi, & the CEO Mr. Ajay Shrivastava, inaugurated the event by lighting a lamp to Goddess Saraswati.  

The VC Dr Rakesh Yadav & senior Agriculture Scientist cum Dean Prof C P Kushwaha assisted them in inaugurating the seminar.

On this occasion, the Group Chairman Dr Sudhir Giri, called agriculture the soul & backbone of the Indian economy.

He reiterated the commendable work by the Government to improve the condition of farmers by adopting progressive farming techniques that will make India self-reliant & strong.

Prof A. K. Singh, the chief Speaker, affirmed that agriculture has boundless opportunities.

If the farmer abandons traditional farming & adopts the latest techniques of organic farming, animal husbandry, fishing, mushroom cultivation & tissue culture and operates it as a business, then they can augment their income & make India a world leader.

In terms of employment generation, the agriculture sector ranks only after the IT & management sector.

The experts gave tips for doubling farmer’s income by establishing food parks, technology start-ups, & agriculture export zones.

Over a dozen agriculture scientists from Sardar Patel Agriculture University, Pantnagar University, gave their valuable advice in the 2 day seminar.

The Pro Chancellor Dr Rajiv Tyagi advocated farmers must discard traditional farming and integrate technology to make farming an industry. Only then can India become a world leader.

HOD Prof C P Kushwaha, Dr Jyoti Singh from SPAU, Dr Raj Kumar, Dr Laxmi Karan & Dr Mata Prasad also addressed the agriculture seminar.

Those present included the Registrar Dr Piyush Pandey, Dr Varsha Yadav, Dr Lasita Arora, Arun Goswami, Neetushree Pal, Dr Rajesh Singh, Maroof Chaudhary & S Baghel.

Noticeable with his presence was the Meerut Campus Director Dr Pratap Singh and the Media In charge Mr. Vishwas Rana provided good news coverage.

Miss Ashi anchored the program very well.

[kisansabha]

Know How Agriculture Startups Affects The Indian Market

Being a river based country, agriculture plays an important role in India’s economy. Almost of 58% of India’s economy depends on the agriculture sector. According to the Central Statistics Office's (CSO) second suggested estimates, the Gross Value Added (GVA) for the agricultural and allied industries (including agriculture, livestock, forestry, and fishing) in the 2016–17 fiscal year was 17.3% at 2011–12 prices.

According to the statistics, it is the agriculture culture sector which employs half of the Indian population and the entire nation is greatly depend on that. With the modern technology the agriculture sector got a boost and therefore this situation creates a huge scope for agriculture start-ups in this country. One of the key tactics used by business-minded farmers to practice profitable agriculture is the transformation of agriculture into agri-business.

There are various kinds of agriculture startups that have surfaced in India and are changing the Indian agriculture market. From farming to the distribution of farm produce, start-ups have entered and modified many parts of the agriculture sector. There are various agriculture start-ups that are using various kinds of unique ideas to improve the agriculture sector in India. These ideas are helping farmers make more money on their farming and are also giving consumers the necessary agriculture products they need at an affordable cost. 

Some agriculture start-ups are also integrating technology into the farming sector to make the farming process more efficient and are making the distribution of farm produce to the end consumers very transparent. Farmers with the help of those agriculture startups are producing more than they ever could and are also making a lot of profits by cutting any kind of middlemen involved in the distribution process. The agriculture start-ups are also funding farms heavily for better results and making farmers richer in the process. Due to this reason, the government has also stepped in and are actively supporting various startups that are revolutionizing the agriculture market in India. Over the past ten years, the sector has been flooded by educated millennial who are driven by ideas, passion, and innovations to introduce newer types of technology and business models to transform agriculture from a low-tech to a high-tech industry.

[mnoonthego]

Day 28- On the move again (January 5)

Today was packing up day in order to move from Shela down the coast to Watamu. As our flight didn’t leave until later in the day we had the morning to chill and absorb the last bits of Shela. Our first stop of the day- our favourite beach front juice cafe. We have been really spoiled by our daily mango and what ever other flavour we fancied juices. We thought we would enjoy chapatis with our juice as this has become another favourite. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any chapatis so we enjoyed our juices and the people, donkey and cat watching. Tamsyn is working hard on me to get a cat when we get home. There are so many strays here in various states of health, they really need someone to start managing the population! As you can imagine we have named a number of them although I won’t let the girls touch them.

We decided that we really wanted some chapatis before we left so we headed down the beach to another seaside cafe that was recommended for its Swahili dishes. They said they had chapatis so we decided to have an early lunch and try some other traditional dishes- prawns and fries, coconut beans and chapatis and grilled Swahili fish and chapatis. There are some other dishes we thought we would try but they were out and the server seemed quite put off that we didn’t know that they no longer offered them (although they were on the menu!?!). It was a great meal to finish off our time in Shela. As we sat in the cafe, which is open to the “sidewalk” we were amazed how many people walked by and said hi as we had met them at some point during our visit to the island.

Where ever Mark and I travel, we always chat about if we could live there. Sheila is the only place in Kenya so far that I would consider. I think it would be quite a project but it would be very cool to renovate one of the many run down buildings and fit in with the daily groove of the community. That said, it wouldn’t be easy living.

After lunch, we meandered back to Faraha House to finish packing up, which is a big ordeal as each flight has a different baggage weight restrictions. Its like a game of baggage Jenga to fit it all in and thank goodness we travel with a luggage scale.  

When it was time to go we headed done to the “pier” to get our taxi dhow over to the airport. It is a gorgeous way to leave a place.  You can look back to the island and reflect on all of your experiences as well as enjoy the trip its self. After our experience with the baggage coming on to the island, we had a plan that we would decline any offers of help with our luggage and make our own way hassle free.

Thankfully the flight from Shela to Malindi/Watamu was a short one as it was one of the hottest flights (ask me about flying over the Florida Everglades) I have ever been on and I was VERY thankful to have my fan.

We were surprised to see that the tiny Malindi airport was an international airport.

From the airport, we took a 1/2 hour taxi to our Air BnB apartment in Watamu. Malindi seems like an industrious little town busy with trade and commerce and a lot of mangos farms whereas Watamu is the tourist hotspot due to the gorgeous beaches and clear water. As we were driving in, Watamu reminded me of Mexico. There are big resorts (although not chain hotels) lining the beach and behind big gates and miles of small stalls selling everything from fish and carvings to beach wear and bedding.

We are super excited about our apartment! It like a great location with easy access to everything- the beach is right there, shops, restaurants etc. The apartment itself is two levels, with the bedrooms downstairs where it is cooler, and the girls are thrilled that we are right beside the pool.

We haven’t tried a TukTuk yet so we thought that would be a good way to get to the grocery store to get some supplies for the next few days. TukTuks are 3 wheeled vehicles imported from India that run on a two stroke engine and are popular taxis. As per normal, what seemed like a simple trip ended with some drama. We thought we had negotiated the price of the ride but go figure when we arrived back, the price was different. Dealing with a “hangry” Mark is never a good idea and at this point, we are tired of thinking things are one price and then suddenly things change. Anyway with the help of the staff, we got it sorted out. In the big scheme of things it isn’t a big deal but the feeling that you are constantly being targeted as you are a “Muzungu” (foreigner) gets a bit much.

Tourists here are 80% Italian and the grocery store reflected the audience. We grabbed some pasta and other provisions and felt set up for our visit. Mark was happy to find more decaf coffee as he hadn’t had any for a few days and was feeling a bit desperate in the mornings.

Back at the apartment, I was searching for the light switch in the bedroom when I realized I hit the security alarm by mistake. I went running outside to tell the onsite security guard, what I did, which led to a bit of a language and process confusion, and he put in an urgent call to the security company so they didn’t arrive to investigate.

We then tried to make dinner usually a rather uneventful process. To start off, Mark grabbed a frying pan from under the sink but I guess it has been stashed there as someone didn’t want to clean out the left over grease so that went everywhere. Of course, there were no paper towels or rags so we resorted to a roll of toilet paper to sop it up. After we got the worst of it up we then discovered that someone had diluted the dish soap so a little squirt went everywhere and we continued to work through the roll of toilet paper. Air BnBs are notorious for their poor knives and cheap pots. We had to laugh at the pasta pot. Based on the look of it, it was once a teflon pan but maybe not for the last few years. The next challenge, starting the stove. After various attempts we figured out how to turn the gas on but we couldn’t get it started. So back out to the security guard to see if he could help. He went in search for matches and we were back in business and were able prep our dinner.

[getfarm]

12 Profitable Agriculture Business Ideas That Will Make You Money In Your Sleep!

Agriculture is the backbone of every economy. It provides food, materials, and revenue for communities across the globe. The success of any country’s economy depends on the agricultural sector, which makes up just over 80% of all the labour force employed in the world. Since the beginning of humanity and farming, agriculture has been one of the most important occupations. Proper planning and management of the agricultural sector is required to make it sustainable and productive. 

If You’re looking to start a profitable agriculture business, the first thing to be done is deep research on various types of agriculture activities and types of farming to be able to understand what will work well for you and who will be your target audience. 

The following ideas have proven to be profitable and may assist you in getting started!

Organic Produce: In India, we are blessed with varied climates that encourage the growth of a variety of vegetables and fruits such as organic Mangoes, Grapes, Pomegranate, Chillies, Brinjal and many more. In this business, you can earn significant profits as India has a huge market for imported vegetables and fruits. There is a booming demand for organic fruits and vegetables, this may help you set up platforms for organic food or supply to local supermarkets and restaurants. It is important to choose a few areas of organic farming and stick with instead of trying too many, for instance if you are more familiar with mango farming and sapota farming, then stick with produce of this kind only, unless you have resources who can help with other areas of organic farming as well. 

Herbal and Medicinal Plants: India is home to a variety of unique medicinal plants that have been used for a variety of purposes, including treating diseases, creating perfumes, and providing flavours to food. There is a growing demand for herbal solutions for our daily living over chemicals and antibiotics. A thorough research and deep study into herbal medicine can help you do wonders in this line of work. 

Poultry: A good business idea that can be started from your farm is to produce poultry feed such as chicken feed, duck feed, and quail feed. Poultry farming is a great way to generate income with the booming demand for organic meat everywhere. You can sell to nearby markets or direct households. Farm bred meat has become a delicacy across the world and has the potential to bring back excellent returns.

Flower Business: One of the largest businesses worldwide is the flower business. Every occasion calls for�� a bouquet of flowers, a wedding, a birthday, graduation, an appology or congratulations? Flowers are one of the best ways to earn money. They can be grown, processed, and sold.

Agriculture Seeds: A business in agriculture seeds is one where you can never go wrong, since it has a huge market demand. A farmer always looks for seeds that produce high yields, making for a good harvest, and you can provide them with these seeds, such as hybrids and paddy. You can be a supplier of such seeds to enable farming activities. 

Bee Keeping: The beekeeping business opportunity requires constant monitoring and close supervision. Globally, honey demand is growing due to a growing awareness of health issues. It is a profitable venture to start with little startup capital to sell honey and other products like wax.

Wheat Farming: Wheat farming is another highly profitable business idea that can be started on a small scale. Its produce, such as wheat flour, bread, and biscuits, can be sold to nearby markets or retail shops for a great income.

Fish Farming: Fish farming is a lucrative investment that can generate income throughout the year.Modern techniques and owning space can help an entrepreneur start this business at a moderate cost.

Dairy Farming: Dairy farming is one of the most profitable agricultural business ideas. Aside from milk, it also produces manure. There is a high demand for organic dairy products all year round such as milk, cheese, curd, cream and so much more. Increasing milk production through profitable dairy farming has great potential.

Spices: Spice processing has seen a boost in recent years due to rising global demand. The demand for good quality processed spices is very high. The methods of processing and packaging are not very complex. Moreover, the margins are very satisfying in spice processing.

Soybean Farming: The commercial processing of soya beans for the production of milk, soy flour, soy sauce, soy oil, natto, etc is an extremely profitable agriculture business concept to start with a moderate investment. You can cultivate soybean farming on your own farmland and supply to local markets or e-portals. 

Rice Farming: Rice is considered the staple food for a large human population in the world. It is considered  as one of the largest produced commodoties and there will always be demand for rice. Being a basic need, it can generate excellent profits throughout the year. 

You can now buy your own fully developed farms to be able to cultivate various profitable agriculture activities with lesser hassle. Getfarms brings you well maintained, fully developed farms at affordable prices. You can plan and strategize at the comfort of your own farm while being your own boss!

[entrepreneurshipprogram]

How To Start Fish Farming Business In India?

Fish farming is also known as aquaculture. It is the breeding, rearing, and harvesting of all types of water environments. It includes rivers, lakes, oceans, and ponds. Around 60 percent of the Indian population, prefer consuming fish and its products that can make the fish farming business one of the most profitable businesses in India.

Production of seafood from hatchery shellfish and fish is done to cater to the market. Aquaculture or fish farming is carried out in tanks, ponds, raceways, or cages with proper maintenance of water and medicines for the better growth of the fishes.

How To Start A Fish Farming Business?

Fish is a rich source of vitamins and proteins. It makes the demand for fish high in the market. As per the increasing demand and supply, fish farming has developed modern traditions. Breeding and taking care of them till the fish grow and maintain the growing number in the tanks or ponds.

Process Of Starting A Fish Farming Business In India

Select Location Of Fish Farming

Choose a location to construct a fish tank or pond. With the proper construction, it is important to maintain the right temperature and conditions for breeding fish. Try to start setting up the tank in winter. As in winters, the fish do not grow much in size.

Design And Construct A Fish Pond

You can purchase ready-made tanks made from plastic material for saving yourself time and money.

Else, you can buy a plot, dig a big pond and make the necessary shed.

Coat the pond’s surface with a mixture of bleaching powder and mud.

Prepare the mixture with calcium powder to prevent it from growing algae and fungus in the water, which harm fish.

Prepare Fish Feed

The fish has to survive the complete growth cycle. It makes natural breeding an essential part of fish farming.

Select the type of food that you want to feed your fish according to their kind and numbers.

Maintain the hygiene and temperature of the pond along with maintaining the salinity and pH.

If you are also interested in starting a Fish Farming business in India and need more information, you can visit www.iid.org.in. Institute for Industrial Development is an incubator with the Government of India that is working towards nurturing the young entrepreneurs of the nation and make the youth business ready.

[chasicare]

Chasicare - Organic Farming is the Future of Urban Agriculture

The Chasicare is a farmer centric organization that help you to establish your own organic in various sectors including, Biofloc fish farming, Aquaponics, Dairy farming, Goatry farming, Poultry farming and more. The Chasicare team also help to setup your organic farm in the flats, rooftop, balcony or any other open spaces and keep you safe from the hazardous effects of junk foods like Pizza, Burger, Hot Chips etc………

Chasicare : About Us Page Content

Agriculture and it’s allied sectors, is undoubtedly the largest source of livelihood in Indian, and augmenting this agriculture sector is more necessary in order to generate employment and income opportunities for the rural and urban population. The sustainable agriculture development in terms of organic farming, food security, and employment is more essential for the holistic development of the fastest growing economy country like India. The global pandemic like COVID 19 teaches us how to stay independent and focus on the organic farming that need for our day-to-day life. The Chasicare will help you to establish your own organic farm in the flats, rooftop, balcony or any other open spaces and keep you safe from the hazardous effects of junk foods like Pizza, Burger, Hot Chips etc….

The organic farming is rising day by day in urban area, and there are many initiatives and agricultural development programs taken by the government of India to augment this organic farming sector. From accessing the new range of technologies to providing the subsides in agriculture sector, the Government of India helping people with all aspects. At Chasicare, we support and assist many rural and urban people in Odisha to get the benefits of new technology and subsidies available in this organic farming agriculture sectors like (Biofloc Farming, Diary & Goatery Farming, Aquaponics Farming etc..

What Chasicare Do?

- To Aware about Agricultural Schemes and Subsides available by the state and central governments of India.

- Give training for Biofloc farming, Diary Farming, Goatery Farming etc… in Odisha state.

- Helping urban and rural people to establish their organic farm and take government subsidies.

- Assisting people to get new agriculture technology, subsidies and loans from the Central and State Government Agriculture Departments.

- Give technological support and assistance for Organic Farming in Odisha state.

- Helps people of Odisha to start their new agricultural business and augment their employment and income.

- Upgrade agricultural skills and generate more organic farming and facilities in Odisha.

ଚାଷୀର ଉନ୍ନତି, ଦେଶର ପ୍ରଗତି!

Let the Chasicare expert team meet you and discuss about the organic farming facilities including (Biofloc Farming, Diary & Goatery Farming, Aquaponics Farming etc.., and help you to expand your business in your locality. We always stand with our Farmers Friend (ଚାଷୀ ଭାଇ) and will support them from all aspects.

Visit our website https://chasicare.com/ or call us today: 9777028888 for any types of agricultural help and we’ll assist you!

[aromalsula]

After the whole 2 weeks of vadapav and thali

I decided to go for Thane to my Valyamma (mom's elder sister, who inherited all the firm hand from their military father), just to get myself some Kerala fish curry and if lucky some mutton.

I texted my ex-girlfriend to book me a uber since I had debt on ola and uber, from previous ones, and she did, after 20 minutes of her usual cloak and dagger, she got me a cab. And texted me a screenshot of the same. I sat near a tree at the star market with a bottle of Pepsi, while trying not to seek eye contact with a dog sat near me, (no offense, I am afraid of dogs).

After a few minutes, 0541 a grey Datson Go came for me. I kept my backpack at the rear seat and sat in front like I usually do in Mumbai.

Back home I don't get to sit at the front, Dad keeps the front row for him and mom.

I wanted to take a seat a little bit back, the young driver was happy to help me.

The person who booked the cab for me, was on phone with him reading out the OTP, while he was about to cut the call I kind of added a thank you to her, he just laughed to that,

To show my two-year Hindi, I asked him, " ye payment kitna dha ".

Patha nahee m sir, madam ji ne ye online se pay kia dha sir,  he replied with a cheer

While I was thinking that whether I should pay her back, or respect her gratitude, he reminded me about the seatbelt.

Since I didn't have any battery left on my phone after the usual updates and stories on Instagram and Snapchat, I wished to test my Hindi on the young skinny man next to me.

"Aapka Naam kya he bhai ? "

"Kumar sir "

"Acha"

"Ye aapki gaadi he kya "

" Nayi sir , me keval driver hum "

Since I don't exactly knew or understand his Hindi

I am gonna keep this in English.his Paapa’s special Ranchi Chicken.

His name is Kumar, A Ranchi boy, but according to him, he is from MS Dhoni ki Ranchi. Since I was not good geography of India, he explained to me where Ranchi is, Jharkhand, and how Bihar is different, and why Jamshedpur is better.

He is part of a kisani family, Mainly chaval, where only his father is doing farming, while he, his brother, and his sister's husband work in Mumbai,Calcutta, and Jharkhand. His brother stays with his aunt at Calcutta as a helper in their family business, which was something related to the masala. And the sister's husband (Aliyan in Malayalam) was working as a tile mesthiri back in Jharkhand.

He came to Mumbai searching for a job after completing 12th in the science stream, with good marks. He started his earning as a panipuri salesman in some hotel, which he was not so good at, Later so asked one of his friend, a delivery driver to the same hotel, to teach him driving. Kumar was able to learn to drive so fast. After he got his license, the hotel manager himself helped him to get a driving job with a *Setah from Gujarat who owned more than 45 cars.

He loved his new job, where the *Setah only care about the 9000 Rs that Kumar is paying every month. Setah is also kind enough to carry out all the maintenance works.

Kumar is able to help his Paapa to find the money for his elder sister to continue her college education. The only person who went to college after the 12th in his family. He, his brother, his other elder sister( who got married after her 10th standard ) ,Maama, and Paapa is always proud of the college-going sister.

Kumar is the youngest, when I asked him “ tho thu chotta he ? “ he replied “Ha Sir me he Chottu” with a laugh.

On our journey there were a lot of laughs, we shared our criticism against the Mumbai Police, and the traffic, How panipuri tastes better in any place rather than Mumbai, and the fact that you can get a fish curry meal for 30 rs in Calcutta.

He had a lot to talk about when he was talking about his Paapa, that how he loved having a dog around him, and his love for his five cows at home, his sorrow that none of his sons are at home to help him with his farming. And the love story which ended in marrying from one of the prominent families in his village.

Talking about love, Kumar has a love in Calcutta, whom he met whenever he visited his brother there. A Bengali girl, that Kumar’s sisters only know. When I asked him, if he spends his free time on the phone with his, Bengali girl, he replied me “No. And that he needs to be successful in his career, first.

Kumar being in his 20’s already had a plan to set out his career, that he had a passion for business, and that he wants to start a business in his village, again something related to the masala, I didn’t get his business, but I wished him all the best.

He was happy to share with me his love for Kerala, which included stories about Nariyal Pani, a mallu passenger he dropped off at Andheri, and a front who works in a tire company in Kerala. Also, he was so grateful when I offered him a stay if he ever wants to visit Kerala.

The Ranchi Guy had his passion for cricket and Dhoni. When asked about Dhoni, he went the same as when he was talking about his paapa, He was so obsessed with Dhoni that he wants Dhoni to be the Chief Minister of Jharkhand.

I kind of loved his innocence. Well we both agreed on one thing that both of us who knew every playing eleven of

India, till there was Dhoni and Yuvaraj playing. And the fact that now we don’t.

When the ride ended, he told me with a laugh that “ Sir Madam ji ne ye cash me add Kiya dhaa, apko pay Karne chahiye. I couldn’t resist my laugh too, I paid him online, and he asked me for a photo. I was happy to take it, I took his number and told him that I will pay a visit to his marriage, and will surely come for his Paapa's special Ranchi chicken.

[bizzlnaebizzcard12]

Best Fresh Pallets in KOSAMBA in Bizzlane

Successful fish farmers must also have a solid business plan. best FRESH PAPLET in KOSAMBA a fish farm requires start-up capital, a clear marketing strategy, and a forecast of expected costs and profits. Without a well-thought-out plan, it will be difficult to make your fish farm profitable. add= BADSHAH FISH CENTER JUNA BAZAR, FISH MARKET, KOSAMBA, HOME- 3-108, 394120 - Surat Gujarat 394120 mo no 9574533534 #fish farming business , #fish farm minecraft bedrock , #fish farm bedrock , #fish farm , #fish farm minecraft , #fish farming in india , #fish farm minecraft java , #fish farming at home

[himvalleytrout]

Buy Trout Fish in Dehradun | Trout Fish Farming Business Plan | Trout Fish Price in India- Himvalley Trout

If you're planning to start a trout fish farming business, it is advisable to research the market demand and trout fish price in India or your location to ensure that your business is profitable. A trout fish farming business plan will help you to achieve your goals, identify potential challenges, and develop strategies to overcome them. Any assistance or want to buy Trout Fish in Dehradun, any hotel or restaurant head to Himvalley Trout & Contact us at +91-9548751742, +91-9412971414

[newstfionline]

Wednesday, June 2, 2021

Meat Is Latest Cyber Victim as Hackers Hit Top Supplier JBS (Bloomberg) The world’s biggest meat supplier has become the latest casualty of a cybersecurity attack. JBS SA shut its North American and Australian computer networks after an organized assault on Sunday on some of its servers, the company said by email. The attack sidelined two shifts and halted processing at one of Canada’s largest meatpacking plants, while the company canceled all beef and lamb kills across Australia, industry website Beef Central said. Some kill and fabrication shifts have also been canceled in the U.S. Hackers now have the commodities industry in their crosshairs with the JBS attack coming just three weeks after the operator of the biggest U.S. gasoline pipeline was targeted. It’s also happened as the global meat industry battles lingering Covid-19 absenteeism after recovering from mass outbreaks last year that saw plants shut and supplies disrupted.

China’s future gateway to Latin America is a mega-port in Peru (America Economia) Despite local opposition, Chinese investors are pumping billions into the Chancay project, a massive port complex north of Lima that will boost trade between China and Latin America as a whole, reports Gonzalo Torrico in business magazine America Economia. The Chancay port complex, with an initial investment of $1.3 billion, will turn this fishing and farming town into a regional hub that could redefine shipping lines in the entire southern Pacific. Since 2019, the project’s main stakeholder is the Chinese state firm Cosco Shipping Ports (60%). Cosco is a partner in 52 port projects worldwide. But in the Americas, Chancay is the first being built with Chinese capital. The complex is expected to be fully functional by 2024, helping consolidate China’s influence in South America, and in Peru especially. In the last decade, this country has become the regional crux of China’s economic and geopolitical interests. So far, Chinese firms have invested more than $30 billion in Peru, a figure exceeded only by money spent in Brazil. The principal sector is mining, which has absorbed more than half all these investments and has proven to be an excellent source for the mineral materials China needs to keep its industrial sector humming. One of those materials is copper, which Peru produces in great quantity.

More boats on canals and rivers than in 18th century as thousands opt for life afloat (Guardian) Little more than six months ago, Paul and Anthony Smith-Storey were still living in a three-bedroom semi-detached house near St Helens in Merseyside. But now the couple—and their dog, Dexter—have traded it all in for a life afloat in a two-metre-wide narrowboat on Peak Forest Canal in Derbyshire. “We took the equity out of the house, bought the boat and thought we’d enjoy it while we were still alive,” said Anthony, 48, an NHS sonographer. They are not the only ones. Record numbers are spending time on Britain’s rivers and canals, according to the Canal and River Trust. Such is their popularity that the charity, which manages 2,000 miles of waterways across England and Wales, says: “There are more boats on our canals now than at the height of the industrial revolution.” The Inland Waterways Association (IWA) said there are about 80,000 powered boats across the waterways of England, Scotland and Wales. Boat builders and sellers put the surge in interest down to the pandemic.

NSA spying row: US and Denmark pressed over allegations (BBC) European powers have pressed the US and Denmark over reports the two worked together to spy on top European politicians, including German Chancellor Angela Merkel. Danish broadcaster DR said Denmark’s Defence Intelligence Service (FE) collaborated with the US National Security Agency (NSA) to gather information from 2012 to 2014. Mrs Merkel is among those demanding answers. “This is not acceptable between allies, and even less between allies and European partners,” said French President Emmanuel Macron, after speaking with Mrs Merkel.

The Taliban Say They’ve Changed. On the Ground, They’re Just as Brutal. (WSJ) During a recent trip, Kamaluddin visited a barbershop to obtain the illicit pleasures of clean-shaven cheeks and a fashionable mustache. But the shopkeeper, 25 years old, planned to let it regrow before heading home, wary of incurring the Taliban’s wrath. His father and brother were caught last month using smartphones in their home district of Arghistan, an area effectively ruled by the movement. The insurgents confiscated the devices, which could be used for supposedly un-Islamic behavior such as playing music and videos, and forced the men to swallow their SIM cards. Kamaluddin recounted the incident as he waited to return from Kandahar, the government-controlled provincial capital. “They will put me in prison if they see me like this,” he said. “If the Taliban come back, they will bring darkness.” The Taliban, ousted from power by a U.S.-led invasion 20 years ago, are poised to expand their influence as American forces leave the country. The group has sought in recent months to present themselves as a responsible state actor to regional powers and the West. Indeed, some of their most-violent punishments, such as amputations for accused thieves, are used less frequently than in the 1990s as they seek to avoid alienating Afghans. Yet accounts from Kamaluddin and others living under Taliban rule, as well as insurgents themselves, suggest that the group’s governance is as ruthless as ever.

Delhi Reopens a Crack (NYT) The Indian capital, which just weeks ago suffered the devastating force of the coronavirus, with tens of thousands of new infections daily and funeral pyres that burned day and night, is taking its first steps back toward normalcy. Officials on Monday reopened manufacturing and construction activity, allowing workers in those industries to return to their jobs after six weeks of staying at home to avoid infection. The move came after a sharp drop in new infections, at least by the official numbers, and as hospital wards emptied and the strain on medicine and supplies has eased. Life on the streets of Delhi is not expected to return to normal immediately. Schools and most businesses are still closed. The Delhi Metro system, which reopened after last year’s nationwide lockdown, has suspended service again. But the city government’s easing of restrictions will allow people to begin returning to work—and, more broadly, to start to repair India’s ailing, pandemic-struck economy.

Myanmar carries out air strikes after militia attacks (Reuters) Myanmar’s military used artillery and helicopters on Monday against anti-junta militias in the country’s east, witnesses and rebels said, forcing residents to flee and join thousands of others displaced by recent fighting in the region. Residents of Kayah state bordering Thailand said the military was firing artillery from positions inside the state capital Loikaw into Demoso, about 14.5 km (9 miles) away, where a People’s Defence Force said it had attacked troops and was coming under heavy fire. Myanmar’s military is fighting on multiple fronts and struggling to impose order since its Feb. 1 coup against Aung San Suu Kyi and her elected government, sparking nationwide protests and paralysing strikes. Decades-old conflicts between the military and ethnic minority armies have also reignited, while militias allied with a shadow government have stepped up attacks on the army, which has responded with heavy weapons and air strikes, forcing thousands to flee.

North Korea’s missile warning (Foreign Policy) North Korea warned the United States on Monday that relaxing South Korea’s missile limits could lead to an “acute and instable situation” in the region. “The termination step is a stark reminder of the U.S. hostile policy toward (North Korea) and its shameful double-dealing,” said Kim Myong Chol, an unofficial mouthpiece for Pyongyang, in a statement issued by North Korea’s official Korean Central News Agency. The United States recently lifted a 500-mile range restriction on South Korea’s missile program, in place since 1979. South Korea’s industrial ability to ramp up new missile production “could lead to an arms race with devastating implications,” Donald Kirk wrote last week in Foreign Policy.

Australian court upholds ban on most international travel (AP) An Australian court on Tuesday rejected a challenge to the federal government’s draconian power to prevent most citizens from leaving the country so that they don’t bring COVID-19 home. Australia is alone among developed democracies in preventing its citizens and permanent residents from leaving the country except in “exceptional circumstances” where they can demonstrate a “compelling reason.” Most Australians have been stranded in their island nation since March 2020 under a government emergency order made under the powerful Biosecurity Act. Surveys suggest most Australians applaud their government’s drastic border controls. The Australian newspaper published a survey last month that found 73% of respondents said the international border should remain closed until at least the middle of next year.

Lebanon’s economic crisis (Foreign Policy) Lebanon’s economic collapse could rank within the top 3 “most severe crises episodes globally since the mid-nineteenth century,” according to a new report issued by the World Bank. The report cites the “brutal and rapid” contraction of Lebanon’s GDP, which dropped from $55 billion in 2018 to $33 billion in 2020. “The social impact of the crisis, which is already dire, could rapidly become catastrophic,” the report notes, as more than half of Lebanon’s population is already living below the poverty line.

Congo killings (Foreign Policy) At least 55 people were killed in overnight attacks near two villages in eastern Congo, close to the border with Uganda. Congolese officials blamed the attack on the Allied Democratic Forces, an Islamist insurgent group that in March was deemed a foreign terrorist organization by the United States. The group killed more than 850 people in 2020, according to the United Nations. At the beginning of May, President Félix Tshisekedi declared a state of siege across the affected regions, surging troops in a bid to quell violence.

[love-pyramus]

hi.

you're on a rock floating in space.

pretty cool, huh?

some of it's water.

fuck it, actually most of it's water.

i can't even get from here to there without buying a boat.

it's sad.

i'm sad.

i miss you.

how did this happen?

a long time ago, actually never, and also now, nothing is nowhere.

when?

never.

makes sense, right?

like i said, it didn't happen.

nothing was never anywhere.

that's why it's been everywhere.

it's been so everywhere you don't need a where.

you don't even need a when.

that's how every it gets.

forget this.

i wanna be something.

go somewhere.

do something.

i want things to change.

i want to invent time and space.

and i know it's possible because everything is here and it probably already happened.

i just don't know when to start.

and that's exactly where it started.

whoah, i paused it.

i think there's a universe now.

what's it made of?

quarks & stuff

ah, that's a thing.

in a place.

don't like it?

try a new place.

at a different time™.

try to stick together, because the world is gonna get bigger.

and emptier.

but it's not empty yet.

it's still very full, and about a kjghpillion degrees.

great news!

the quarks are now happily married, in groups of three called a proton or a neutron

and there's something else flying around too that wants to join in but can't cause it's still too

HOT

great news!

the protons and neutrons are now happily married to each other.

and some of them even doubled up.

great news, the electrons have now joined in

congratulations, the world is now a bunch of gas in space.

but it's getting closer together.

and it's getting closer together.

and it's getting closer toge-

it's a star

new shit just got made!

some stars burn out and die.

bigger stars burn out and die with passion, and make some brand new, way crazier shit.

space dust

which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into

even crazier space dust

so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things.

like this ball of flaming rocks for example.

holy shit, we just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks.

and it kind of made a mess.

which is

now the moon

weather update:

it's raining rocks from outer space.

weather update:

those rocks might have had water inside them, and now there's hot steam in the sky.

weather update:

cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava.

weather update:

it's raining.

severe flooding alert:

the entire world is now an ocean.

volcano alert:

that's land!

there's life in the ocean

what?

something's alive in the ocean

oh cool, like a plant or an animal?

no, a microscopic speck.

it lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup, which is being served hot and fresh, made from gnarly space ingredients left over from when it was raining rocks or whatever.

oh yeah, and it can do that.

it has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself.

so that's pretty nifty, i would say.

tired of living at the bottom of the ocean?

now you can eat sunlight!

using a revolutionary technique, you can convert sunlight into food

taste the sun

side effect: now there's oxygen everywhere and the sky's blue.

then the earth might have been a snowball for a while, maybe even a couple of times.

it's a sponge.

it's a plant.

it's a worm, and some other types of weird strange water bugs and strange fish.

it's the Cambrian explosion

"wow, that's animals and stuff"

but we're still in the ocean, hey, can we go on land?

no

why?

the sun is a deadly lazer

oh okay.

not anymore, there's a blanket

now the animals can go on land.

come on, animals, let's go on land!

nope, can't walk yet.

and there's no food yet, so i don't care.

ok, will you learn to walk if there's plants up here?

maybe, said some bugs, and fish.

ok, so i can go on land, but i have to go back in the water to

have babies

learn to use an egg.

i was already doing that.

use a stronger egg.

put water in it.

have a baby, on land, in an egg.

water is in the egg.

baby, in the egg, in the water, in the egg.

works for me.

bye bye ocean

and now everything's huge.

including bugs.

wanna see a map of the land?

sure.

oh fuck, now everything's dead.

just kidding, here are the survivors.

keep your eye on this one because it's about to become the dinosaurs.

here's another map of the land.

yeah, it broke apart, don't worry about it, it does that all the time.

here comes a meteor.

and the dinosaurs are gone

it's mammal time, here come the mammals.

look at those breasts.

now they're gonna dominate the world and one of them just learned how to grab stuff.

and walk.

no, like, walk like that.

and grab stuff at the same time.

and bang rocks together to make pointed rocks.

"ouch"

and set things on fire.

"yeouch"

and make crazy sounds with their voice.

"gneurshk"

which can mean different things.

that's a human person

and now they're everywhere.

almost.

ice age

what, you can walk over here?

cool.

not anymore

well i guess we're stuck here now.

let's review.

there's people on the planet.

and they're chasing their food.

fuck it, time to plant some grass.

look at this.

i control the food now.

now everyone will want to be my friend and live near me.

let's all build houses except mine is bigger because i own the food.

this is great, i wonder if anyone else is doing this.

tired of using rocks for everything?

use metal.

it's underground.

better farming was just invented, in a sweet dank valley right in between these two rivers.

and the animals are helping.

guess what happens next

more food.

and more people who came to buy the food.

now you need people to help make the food and keep track of the sales.

and now you need houses for people to live in and people to make the houses, and now there's more people and they invent things, which makes things better and more people come and there's more farming and more people to make more things for more people and now there's business, money, writing, laws, power.

Society

coming soon to a dank river valley near you.

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, the horse is probably being tamed.

why is all my metal so lame and lumpy?

tired of using lame, sad metal?

introducing

Bronze

made with special ingredient tin from the far lands of tin land.

i don't know, my dealer won't tell me where he gets it.

also, guess what?

egypt

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, they figured out how to put wheels on a horse.

now we're getting somewhere.

also

china

and did i mention

indus river valley civilization

norte chico

the middle east is getting more complicated, maybe because it's in the middle of the east.

knock knock, er, clop clop.

it's the people with the horses.

and they made an empire.

and then everyone else copied their horses.

greeks

ah look, it must be the greeks, er, a beta version of the greeks.

let's check in with the indus river valley civilization.

they're gone.

guess who's not gone?

china

new arrivals in india, maybe it's those horse people i was talking about, or their cousins or something

and they wrote some hymns and mantras and stuff

you could make a religion out of this.

there's the bronze age collapse.

now the phoenicians can get down to business

also, can we switch to a metal that's a little easier to find?

thanks.

look who came back to israel, it's the twelve tribes of israel.

and they believe in God

just 1 though, he's got like a ten step program.

here's some huge heads.

must be the olmecs.

the phoenicians make some colonies.

the greeks copy their idea and make some colonies.

the phoenicians made a colony so big it makes colonies.

here comes the assyrian empire.

never mind, it's the babylonian- median-

it's the Persian Empire

"wow, that's big"

ah, the buddha was just enlightened.

who's the buddha?

this guy, who sat under a tree for so long that he figured out how to ignore the fact that we're all dying.

you could make a religion out of this.

oops, china just broke, but while it was breaking, confucius was figuring out how to have good morals.

ah, the greeks just had the idea of thinking about stuff.

and right over here, alexander just had the idea of conquering the entire persian empire.

it's a great idea.

he was great.

and now he's dead.

hopefully the rest of the gang will be able to share the empire evenly between them.

knock knock, it's chandragupta, he says get the hell out of here.

will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants?

ok thanks, bye

time to conquer all of india

or

most of india

but what about this part?

that's the tamil kings, no one conquers the tamil kings.

who are the tamil kings?

merchants, probably

and they've got spices

who would like to buy the spices?

me, said the arabians, swiftly buying it and selling it to the rest of the world.

hey, china put itself back together again, with good morals as their main philosophy.

actually, they have three main philosophies.

out here, the horse nomads run wild and free, and they would like to ransack your city.

let's check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms.

greekification overload!

bye, said the parthians.

bye, said the jews.

hi, said the parthians, taking over the entire place.

heyyyyyyyy, said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast.

thanks for invading our homeland, said the jews, who were starting to get tired of people invading their homeland.

hi, everything's great, said some guy who seems to be getting very popular and is then arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular.

you could make a religion out of this.

want silk?

now you can buy it from china.

they just made a

brand new road to the world

or you can

get there on water

sick! new trade routes! said india, accidentally spreading their religion to the entire southeast.

hmm, that's a good place for an epic trading kingdom.

there goes buddhism traveling up the silk road.

i wonder if it'll reach china before it collapses again.

remember the persian empire?

yep, said the persians, making a new one.

axum is getting so powerful they would like to build a long stick.

has anyone populated madagascar yet?

let's do it together.

china is whole again

then it broke again

still can't cross the sahara desert?

try camels.

hell yeah! now we've got business

said the ghana empire, selling lots of gold, and slaves

hi, i live in the roman empire, and i was wondering

is loving jesus legal yet?

no.

actually, ok, sure, said constantine, moving the capital way over here to be closer to his

main rival

don't worry about rome, it won't fall.

it's the golden age of india

there's the gupta empire, not chandragupta, just gupta.

first name chandra.

the first.

guess who's in rome?

barbarians

what's a barbarian?

non-romans, said the romans, being invaded by non-romans.

r.i.p., roman empire, er, actually just half of it, the other half is just fine, but it's not in rome anymore so let's give it a new name.

the mayans have figured out the stars

oh and here's a huge city, population: everyone

the göktürks have taken over the entire eurasian steppe.

great job, göktürks.

how's india?

broken.

how's china?

back together

how's those trading kingdoms?

bigger, and there's more of them

korea has 3 kingdoms.

japan has a kingdom, it's the sunrise kingdom.

deep in the arabian desert, on the top of a mountain, the real god whispers in muhammed's ear.

so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods and he tells them their gods are all fake.

and everyone got so mad at him that he had to leave town and go to a different town.

you could make a religion out of this.

and maybe conquer the world as well.

the roman empire is long gone, but somehow the pope is still the pope.

plus there's

new kingdoms all over europe

i wonder if there's room for moors.

here's all the wisdom.

in a house.

it's the baghdad house of wisdom.

just in time for the

islamic golden age

let's bring stuff to the coast and sell it, and become the swahili on the swahili coast, said the swahili on the swahili coast.

remember this tiny space you have to go through to get from here to there?

someone owns that now.

wanna get enlightened in the middle of nowhere?

the franks have the biggest kingdom in europe, and the pope is so proud that he invites the king over for christmas.

surprise! you're the new roman emperor, said the pope, pretending to still be part of the roman empire.

then the franks broke their kingdom into what will later be called france and not france.

but the northerners, or just norse if you don't have much time, are exploring.

they go north, from the north to the northern north.

and they find some land.

two types of land.

and they name them accordingly.

they also invade some other places, and get called many names, such as vikings.

there's the rus.

the kievan rus.

are they vikings?

i don't think so, said the kievan rus.

ok, fair enough.

the pope is ready to make some more emperors.

of the "roman empire".

the holy roman empire.

it's actually germany but don't worry about it.

new kingdoms.

christianize all the kingdoms

which brand would you like?

mine's better.

mine's better.

mine's better.

time to conquer england, said william.

it's a bird, it's a plane

it's the seljuk turks

aah! said the byzantine empire who's getting so small and almost doesn't exist anymore.

we need help!

they need help, so they call the pope.

hey pope, can you help us get rid of the seljuks?

maybe take back the holy land on the way?

come on, i know you want to take back the holy land.

yes, i do actually want to do that.

let's do a crusade.

crusade

they did many crusades, some of which almost didn't fail.

but at least the italians got some sweet trade deals.

goodbye mayans.

hello toltecs

goodbye toltecs.

hello mississippi

look at those mounds.

there's the pueblo.

i always wondered how to build a town in a cliff.

guess who's here?

khmer.

where?

here.

and pagan is there.

vietnam unconquered itself, korea just became itself, and japan is so addicted to art that the military might have to take over the government.

china just invented bombs, and typing.

and the mongols just invaded most of the universe.

nice going, Genghis!

i bet that will last a long time.

some of the islamic turks were unaffected by the mongol invasions because they were busy invading india.

is it tonga time?

i think it's tonga time.

i just found out where the swahili gets all their gold.

look at this chad.

means "lake".

there's an empire there.

right in the middle of

Africa

the king of mali is so rich he's going on tour to let everyone know.

wow, that guy's rich, everyone said.

the christians are doing a great job reconquering iberia, which will soon be called spain and not spain.

please remain christian.

we will check in later to see if you're still christian when you least expect.

whoops, half of europe just died.

ming

china's back, yay!

hey khmer, time to share.

new kingdoms here and there.

oh, look who controls all the islands.

it's the mahajapit.

majahapit.

mapajahit.

mahapajit.

mapajahit.

majapahit?

oh, italy's really rich, time for them to care a lot about art and the ancient classics.

it's kinda like a rebirth.

here's a printer.

let's make books.

so you think you can conquer the byzantine empire?

yep, said the ottoman turks.

nice job, ottoman turks.

whoops, you missed a spot.

don't forget to ban europe from the indian spice trade.

what? that's bullshit, said portugal, spiceless.

well i guess we'll have to find another way to india

wait! said christopher columbus, probably smoking crack.

if the world is round, let's go this way to india.

nah, don't worry, we already got this, said portugal.

so chris goes to spain.

hey spain, wanna hire me to find india by going around back of the world?

no.

please?

no.

please?

no.

please?

ok.

so he sails into the ocean.

and discovers more ocean.

and then discovers the indies.

and japan.

let's draw a line to decide who gets which half of the world.

the aztec and inca empires are off to a great start.

i wonder if they know that europe just discovered their continent?

the habsburgs are marrying into so many royal families they might have to start marrying each other.

move over lithuania, here comes moscow.

ivan wants to make russia great again.

move over timurids, maybe go invade india or something.

persia just made persia persian again.

let's make it the other kind of islam.

the one where we thought the first guy should have been the other guy.

hey christians!

do you sin?

now you can buy your way out of hell.

that's bullshit.

this whole thing is bullshit.

that's a scam.

fuck the church.

here's 95 reasons why, said martin luther, in his new book, which might have accidentally started the protestant reformation.

you know what would be magnificent, said suleiman, wearing an onion hat?

what if the ottoman empire was really big?

which it is now.

what if russia was big? said ivan, trying not to be terrible.

portugal had a dream that they controlled the entire indian ocean, including the spice trade.

and then that dream was real.

and spain realized that this is not india, but they pillaged it anyway.

damn, said england and france.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

then the dutch revolt and all the hipsters move to amsterdam.

damn, said amsterdam.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

question 1: can you get to india through north america?

no, but at least there's beaver.

question 2: steal the spice trade.

that's not a question, but the dutch did it anyway.

sugar

guess where all the sugar's made?

in brazil.

stolen

and the caribbean.

and it's so god damn profitable you might forget to not do slavery.

the next thing on russia's to-do list is to get bigger.

britain and france are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world.

more specifically, ohio.

then it escalates into a seven year discussion, giving prussia a chance to show austria who's boss.

but what about britain and france, did they figure out who's boss?

yes they did.

it's britain.

guess who's broke?

also britain.

so they start taxing the hell out of america.

fuck you, says america, declaring their independence, and fighting for it.

and france helps them win, now france is broke.

and britain'll have to send their prisoners to a different continent.

wait, if france is broke, why do the king and queen still wear such fancy dresses?

let's overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off! said robespierre, cutting everybody's head off until someone eventually got mad and cut his head off.

you could make a reli- no, don't.

haiti is staring to like the idea of a revolution.

especially the slaves, who free themselves by killing their masters.

why didn't we think of this before?

wait, who's in charge of france now?

me

said napoleon, trying to take over europe.

luckily, they banished him to an island.

but he came back

luckily, they banished him to another island.

there goes latin america, becoming independent in the latin american wars of independence.

britain just figured out how to turn steam into power.

so now they can make

many different types of machines and factories with machines in them so they can make a lot of products real fast

then they invent some trains.

and conquer india and maybe put some trains there.

hey, china! said britain.

buy stuff from us!

nah dude, we already got everything, says china.

so britain tried to get them addicted to opium.

which worked, actually.

but then china made it illegal and dumped it all into the sea.

so britain threw a hissy fit, and made them open up five cities and give them an island.

britain and russia are playing a game where they try to stop each other from conquering afghanistan.

also, the

sultan of oman lives in zanzibar now

"that's just where he lives"

india just had a revolution, and they would like to govern themselves now.

nope, said britain, governing them even harder than before.

technology is about to go crazy

the united states finally figured out whether slavery is good or bad.

it's bad, they decided.

and then they continued manifesting their destiny, which is to kill the rest of the natives and take their land and maybe kick out the mexicans too.

i know, let's rape africa, said europe, scrambling to see who could rape it the fastest.

they never got ethiopia

britain and france are still hungry.

they never got thailand

the united states ran out of destiny to manifest, so they're looking for more.

hawaii

cuba

wait, spain controls cuba.

well, blame something on them and go to war!

what should we blame on spain?

let's blame the maine on spain.

so they blame the maine on spain.

now we're in business.

to celebrate, they kick panama out of panama and make a canal, connecting the two oceans.

britain just found oil in the middle east.

it makes cars go

china is so tired of being bossed around that they delete their old government and make a new, stronger government, which is accidentally weaker and controlled by a guy from the previous government.

europe hasn't had a war since the last war.

so they start world war 1.

look at those guns.

it's gonna be a great war.

so great we won't need a second one.

after it's over, they blame germany.

russia went on strike and the workers overthrew the government.

now everyone's paycheck is the same.

communism

in the soviet union

the arabs revolt and britain helps.

now the ottoman empire's gone so we can give the

jewish people a place to live

hopefully the arabs won't mind.

let's cut the cake, said sykes and picot, carving up the remains of the not-so-ottoman-anymore empire.

except turkey, turkey makes a brand new turkey

and then the saudis conquer arabia.

it just seemed like the right thing to do.

hello?

yes, it's the 1920's calling.

let's get in the car and drive to a party and listen to jazz on the radio and go to the movies.

the economy's great and it'll probably be great forever, just kidding.

germany's back, featuring hitler, the angry mustache model.

and he's mad at the jews for existing.

japan is finally conquering the east, and they're so excited they rape nanking way too hard.

they should probably just deny it.

hitler's out of control.

so the international community tackles him and then tries to explain why killing all the jews is a bad idea.

but he kills himself before they could explain it to him.

that's world war 2

bonus round!

pacific showdown.

united states vs. japan.

fight!

finish him

let's unite all the nations and have some

world peace

seems legit.

hi, i'm gandhi, and if britain doesn't get the hell out of india, i'm gonna starve myself in public.

wow, that worked?

bonus, now there's pakistan.

actually two pakistans.

one of them can be bangladesh later.

the jews and the arabs finally figured out which one of them should live in the holy land.

me, they both said at the same time.

let's divide up the land so everyone's happy.

sike, they both get angrier

look out china, there's a new china in china.

what's on the menu?

communism!

no thanks, said the other china, escaping to an island.

i wonder which one is the real china?

there's the korean war, korea versus korea.

nobody wins, then it's on pause forever.

let's meet the sponsors.

oh, it's the two global superpowers.

they're having a friendly debate over which economic system is good, and which one is an evil virus of Satan.

and they both have atom bombs.

fight!

wait, no, that would be the end of the world.

let's just keep it cool and spy on each other instead.

and make sure we have enough atom bombs.

i'll race you to space.

now let's make some more countries fight themselves.

europe is tired of pillaging other continents, so the continents they were pillaging are tired of being pillaged.

so here's a new map, with new countries.

now you can't tell who they're being pillaged by.

the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad.

they decided it's bad, and the world agrees.

south africa might need another minute to think about it.

let's check the world population.

whoa.

okay.

technology's better too, that might keep happening.

the soviet union decides to relax a little, and accidentally falls apart.

europe makes a union, so now they can all use the same money, except britain, because they don't feel like it.

let's check the mail.

surprise, it's on the computer.

whoops, someone just attacked america.

i bet they'll remember that.

phone call.

surprise, it's in your pocket.

wanna learn everything?

surprise, it's on the computer.

now your phone's a computer, which is in your pocket.

whoops, the economy just crashed.

don't worry, the big banks won't fail because they're not supposed to.

surprise!

flying robots.

with bombs.

wanna print a brain?

some people have no friends.

some people have no food.

the globe is warming

and the ocean is full of plastic

let's save the planet! said everybody, not knowing how.

let's invent a thing inventor, said the thing inventor inventor, after being invented by a thing inventor.

that's pretty cool.

by the way, where the hell are we?