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crestfallencrest · 1 year ago

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if you're taking prompts from that list - "so when were you going to tell me the truth?" with whoever you want from vesperia

Prompt: "So when were you going to tell me the truth?" Pairings: Platonic Yuri & Estelle, Slight Flynn/Yuri (Like just a mention, not even enough to tag it) Genre: Angst with some comfort Warnings: Spoilers for the end of the Second Arc of the game. Word Count: 4,290

I'm always taking writing prompts! Feel free to send some or a request if none of the prompts catch your eye! Just remember that I have a right to turn it down! Summary: Estelle listens in on an argument between Yuri and Sodia and learns something that was never meant to be heard.

Notes: Sorry for the delay on this request! I originally wanted to do a oneshot surrounding Judith and Rita's relation to one another but I hadn't had the time to read deeper into it. And then I thought about Yuri and Sodia and The Great Stabbing tm and my anger about its wasted potential and, as much as I love the fics where Flynn finds out, we need more fics of the OTHER members of the crew finding out. So here we go!

===

Estellise felt like her heart could burst in excitement.

It had been a good few months since she had last seen one of her closest friends, Yuri Lowell, in the flesh. She had written to him almost weekly, keeping him updated on her life in Halure with Rita, keeping him updated on Rita’s research (‘Rita created this weird little box that is able to warm up food that has gotten cold. It was going so well until we tried to put metal into it. That didn’t end so well’), keeping him updated on her newest book she was writing, even going so far as to give him a sneak peek from it.

Estelle understood that Yuri was busy so he couldn’t write to her as much as she wrote to him. But she was fine with that! She understood he was busy, especially with Brave Vesperia picking up in popularity nowadays. She appreciated the few times that Yuri responded, rare as they were. She enjoyed hearing about the jobs that he and the others got, how the others were doing (Karol was almost as tall as Yuri now! She made a mental note to go visit soon! She had to see for herself!) and about how Dahngrest was doing nowadays as well.

She treasured every letter she received from her friend, making sure to save them in a box that she kept, full of letters she had received from friends over the years.

Despite the letters though, she hadn’t seen Yuri in a while so she was over the moon when she arrived at the castle in Zaphias and saw a familiar looking canine with sword attached to his hip that was taking a sun nap by the front gate. Upon seeing Repede, she nearly jumped for joy as she let out a joyous cry as she ran over to pet the sleeping dog.

As usual, Repede was awake in an instant and dodged her pets with ease, once again emerging victorious in their constant game of ‘Keep away.’ (“It MUST be a game to him,” Estelle had insisted to Rita one day, back when they all traveled together.)

She admittedly spent more time than necessary trying to catch Repede before she finally decided to leave her friend alone so he could enjoy his nap in the sun in peace. After all, there was another face she had to see as well. Judging by the open window that waited several floors up, she knew immediately where her friend was waiting.

She wasted no time in getting there. She had to keep herself from running to Flynn’s room, forcing herself to keep a slower but steady pace as she practically sped-walked to the man’s office. She briefly wondered if she would be interrupting Yuri and Flynn catching up and was promptly reminded of the time Rita had accidentally barged in on them and…

…ahem.

Maybe she should knock first.

She slows to a stop as she arrives in front of Flynn’s door and takes a moment to catch her breath. She, admittedly, had not been getting enough exercise lately since stopping her travels and it was showing. But as she stood there, trying to catch her breath, she stopped when she heard two voices inside of the room. One a familiar female voice and the other a familiar male voice.

Yuri and Sodia. With no Flynn to be heard. Oh dear.

She could hear their voices speaking, low and mumbled, and it was hard to hear from where she stood. But judging by the tone and just the fact that Yuri and Sodia could never be left alone in a room together without the danger of someone getting hit, whatever conversation they were having was not a friendly one. But they were normally so loud when arguing… Whatever they were discussing must be serious indeed.

…Estelle, unfortunately, couldn’t help herself. She found herself shifting closer to the door, pressing her ear against it. Part of her felt shame at her actions. After all, it was incredibly rude to eavesdrop and if she were caught, Yuri would probably never let her hear the end of it. On the other hand, if there were something wrong between the two of them (besides the usual), then she should know, right? After all, she would like to help if she could.

“...don’t understand why he puts up with you.” Sodia’s voice is heard first, full of scorn and distaste. “You do nothing but infuriate him.”

“I dunno why you keep asking me that.” Yuri’s voice is heard soon after, low, rough and uncaring. “You keep saying that like I’m forcing him to put up with me. You should really be asking HIM this. Not cornering me so you can interrogate me. I already told you where I thought I stood. Not my fault Flynn thinks otherwise.”

“Corner you? You snuck into his room like a common criminal!”

“I don’t blame you for turning a blind eye to this, but in case you’ve missed the memo, my preferred method of entering Flynn’s room is through that window right there. It’s a short climb, it’s fun and it always surprises Flynn. He and even some of the guards are fully aware that I do a bit of breaking and entering when I come to visit now.” Yuri’s voice begins to shift into something a bit more annoyed.

“And I’m shocked that no one finds anything wrong with that!” Sodia’s tone is sharp as her voice begins to rise.

“It’s not like I’m hurting anyone.”

“Now, anyway. But pardoned crimes aside, we both know what you are! A murderer!” Sodia growls out and Estelle instinctively steps back from the door. “How long until you decide that you don’t like the way that Flynn is running things?! How long until you decide to take matters into your own hands?! How long until you slip into this window and cut him down?!”

Estelle had to stop this before it got out of hand. With a deep breath, she places her hand on the doorknob.

“That’s really rich coming from you, of all people.” Yuri snaps back with a forced laugh as Estelle pushes the door open. “Zaude proved that you’re just as likely to try and cut someone down–”

Estelle stops.

Yuri and Sodia both stop.

For a moment, time seems to stop as Yuri and Sodia both turn and stare at their new arrival with wide eyes, akin to a deer caught in a spotlight. Of course, Estelle likely had the same expression on her face. It actually took her brain a few minutes to catch up with what was said.

Zaude. That’s right, Zaude was where they defeated Alexei and the Adephagos was set free. That started a down-spiral of events at the time, and it didn’t give Estelle any time to properly process anything that had happened. But that was also the time that Yuri had vanished for a week. She remembered the way that Brave Vesperia and Flynn had searched everywhere for the man, but to no avail. She lost so much sleep that week that when Yuri finally did show back up, wounded and weakened, she didn’t have much energy to question what had happened as she healed up his injury for him.

Yuri had fallen from Zaude, from what she understood. But she was missing the details. She suddenly remembers now. She remembers Flynn taking the blow for Yuri. Yuri going in for the final attack against Alexei. That giant blastia core falling from the sky, crushing Alexei. She remembered so much smoke. So much chaos but no Yuri to be seen. In the dust and debris, she found Flynn and Witcher and in her panic, she forgot that someone else had been missing.

But later, she had just assumed that she had gone to get help.

But… But… Surely she couldn’t have… Surely Sodia wouldn’t have…

But it was such a small wound. Deep enough to cause heavy damage but not big enough to be caused by Alexei’s blade.

Estelle’s blank and processing expression turned to one of heavy betrayal as her eyes widened and began to tear up. “...Zaude…? It was… At Zaude, it was–” It was you?

Sodia pales and Estelle notices her hesitation as she quietly takes a step back, confirming Estelle's suspicions. Yuri, however, takes a deep breath and takes a few steps towards Estelle, holding out a hand. “Hey… Estelle.” He calls to her, voice soft and careful but they are just enough to snap her out of her trance.

Without another word, she turns on her heels and runs.

She hears Yuri call after her but she doesn’t look back and instead tears through the halls of the castle. What was she running from? If someone were to ask her that question later, she wouldn’t be able to answer. She didn’t know. Was she running from Sodia? From Yuri? She would never imagine that the two of them would hurt her. Yuri proved to be such a valuable and trusted companion and Sodia was too loyal.

Her mind couldn’t help but linger on ‘was’.

How could she do such a thing to Yuri? To Flynn?! And how could Yuri just keep it to himself?! Why wouldn’t he say something?!

“Estelle!”

She hears Yuri call out to her again and she realizes he’s chasing her through the halls. She tries to pick up the pace as her lungs burned and her mind screamed at her. Why are you running? Why are you running away?!

“Estelle!!”

Where was she even going? To her room? To find Flynn? To the exit? Was she intending to run all the way to Halure? What was her plan? What good would running from Yuri do? He was fast, faster than her for sure. If he, by some miracle, didn’t catch her here, then she would have to face him eventually. Why was she even trying to avoid him?!

“ESTELLE!!!” All Estelle can see is a gray blur before a hand slams into the wall in front of her, forcing her to a stop. Before she can even think of backing away, another hand shoots out and places it on the wall on the other side of her, effectively trapping her between it and her dearest friend.

They both are quiet, heavy breaths feeling the air as they recover from the full on sprint down the palace halls and Estelle actually has a moment to let her brain settle. It was a miracle that there hadn’t been any knights in the hallways, now that she thinks about it, because the image of Yuri chasing after her like that would have probably caused a few misunderstandings. Despite how close the man was to Flynn, he still had not gained the trust of most of the knights.

A supposed ruffian (in their eyes anyway) chasing a horrified princess would have turned some heads, for sure.

Estelle, finally, looks up at Yuri’s face and she takes note of how flushed his cheeks were from the sudden marathon he had to take in order to catch her. A part of her assumed that the man would be angry. Angry at her eavesdropping, angry that he actually had to give chase, angry that she knew too much. But instead of the dark glare that she had seen Yuri give off in situations like these was absent and instead, she was staring up at gray eyes filled with concern and– fear…?

She must be mistaken… right? Why would Yuri be afraid?

As they continue to stare up at each other, finally catching their breaths, Yuri slowly retracts his hands when he’s certain that Estelle wasn’t going to run off again and ducks his head slightly. He doesn’t say anything and Estelle’s mind was also going blank as well. What should she say? What could she say? Her mind alternated between shutting down and racing with a million thoughts.

Her eyes trail down to Yuri’s left side, remembering where the wound had been inflicted. Yuri tried not to show it but she knew from the way his steps would sometimes catch and how he flinched when someone bumped into that area or hugged him a little too tightly that it still had some residual pain. Her magic was strong, this was true, but some wounds would still leave scars regardless. This wound in particular had been left alone for too long before it was properly tended to. Duke, thankfully, did a decent job of tending to Yuri’s wounds at the time but that could only do so much against the chronic pains.

Yuri would likely live the rest of his life with this pain. It wasn’t constant but it was frequent enough that it affected the man’s daily life when it flared up. And to think that the one responsible was someone so close to Flynn… and Yuri said nothing.

“...When were you going to tell us the truth?” She finally asks with a whisper, eyes looking up at him, absolutely heartbroken.

Yuri breathes out a sigh, mouth shut tight as his gaze drifts down the hallway from the direction they came from. He doesn’t answer and this does nothing but cause Estelle to raise her voice.

“Yuri, when were you going to tell us?!” She exclaims, reaching out to grasp at both of his arms. “When… When were you planning on telling Flynn?!”

It’s been three years since Zaude. It’s been three years since they had saved the world together. For three years, Yuri has had to keep the peace with his attempted murderer and no one else knew. That fact alone causes anger to rise in her chest as she shakes the man in front of her.

“Yuri, answer me! Why wouldn’t you tell us?!” She feels her eyes well up but she refuses to let the tears shed.

Yuri doesn’t fight to pull out of Estelle’s grasp and lets himself be shook just a bit before he finally looks back at her, face sullen as he finally meets her gaze. “It’s not my truth to tell.” He answers as simply as possible, as if that would answer all questions.

It only causes Estelle to lash out. “Not your truth to tell?!” She steps forward, mouth agape in shock. “Yuri, you were stabbed! You could have been killed! Yuri, we could have– have–”

Lost you. We could have lost you.

“...Estelle, listen to me.” Estelle watches as Yuri places his hands on her shoulders, gently. As she looks back up at him, she finds him staring at her with an unwavering stare full of resolve. “Who am I to you?”

“...Wh…What?” Estelle blinks, moving to wipe at her eyes.

“Who am I to you?” Yuri asks again, not faltering, not even once. “When you think of Yuri Lowell, what is the first thing that pops into your head?”

“I…” Estelle trails off, unsure of what this had to do with anything but she thinks about it nonetheless. “You’re… a very kind man who… who will give anything to protect those who cannot protect themselves. You’ve… you’ve sacrificed so much to get to where you are now. You would willingly put your life on the line to protect people. Not only that, but you’re a very good friend and a valuable ally… and… and…”

Estelle has to pause as her voice wavers and her eyes begin to billow with tears. Yuri was such an amazing person and such a key part of their group of friends and they almost lost him. “Oh, Yuri–” She chokes out, ducking her head as the tears begin to spill.

“I think you’re giving me too much credit…” Yuri mutters quietly but he reaches out to cup her face, wiping away her tears. “C’mon… none of that. I’m not even done explaining yet… What are people going to say if they come out here and see you crying like this?” His voice is quiet and soothing as he attempts to calm her down.

“W-What does…” She stops and sniffles as she wipes at her eyes as well. “What does… that have to do with anything?”

“Just bear with me for a second.” Yuri pauses to pull out a rap from his pocket. It was likely his rag he used to wipe at his sword but he hands it to her anyway to wipe at her face. “Now what did you think of me when you first met me?”

“I…” Estelle tries to think back to the day she first met Yuri. A small feeling of embarrassment washes over her. Had her face not been flushed red from crying, Yuri would have likely seen the blush appear on her cheeks. “...tried to hit you with a vase. I thought you were a thief, breaking into the castle…”

“Yeah, even though I had just knocked the guards out that were attacking you.” Yuri suddenly has a slight smile on his face. “And even after you knew I was Flynn’s friend, you were still cautious and on guard. You knew Flynn said I was trustworthy but you still had to be careful, right?”

Estelle ducks her head in shame. “I… I… don’t know what I was thinking.”

“You were thinking the same thing that Sodia thought.” Yuri points out, squeezing her shoulder. “When Sodia looks at me, she sees a thug. A ruffian. A thief. A troublemaker. A murderer. And she’s right. I’m all of those things. I assaulted knights, I stole when I was younger in order to survive. I threw the Tweedles into a river and broke into buildings I had no business being in. Escaped from jail. And then…” His smile fades and his gaze darkens as he looks down towards his left hand. “I took multiple lives.”

Estelle shakes her head and grabs onto his left hand, squeezing it. “I’m a murderer too, Yuri! After– After Belius–”

“Belius died. There is no taking that back, Estelle. But… it’s different.” Yuri frowns, trying to step over this topic carefully as he pulls his hand away. “You didn’t intend to kill Belius. You were intending on helping her. For me, though… Ragou, Cumore, the Don, Alexei… When I took out my blade, it was with the intent to kill. When I held the blade in my hand, it was followed with one thought in my head. ‘I am going to take this person’s life.’ I intended to follow that conviction, even if I didn’t always like the result. And I was fully prepared to face the consequences for it.”

Estelle stays silent, eyes wide as she stares up at Yuri as he continues the explanation, eyes moving to gaze out of the window rather than at Estelle.

“When Sodia looked at me, she saw me for what I was. A criminal. A murderer. She didn’t have any of the bias that you guys had. She hadn’t grown up with me like Flynn had. She hadn’t traveled with me for months like you guys had. She hadn’t watched me grow up in Zaphias like Leblanc did. She had no ties to me whatsoever. And all she could do was take Flynn’s words at face value.” Yuri shoves his hand into his pocket, his dark eyes scanning the sky as he speaks.

“Flynn’s reasoning never made sense to her. Her Captain was advocating a wanted criminal by insisting that he genuinely was a good person. That the situation was misunderstood. Even after I murdered Ragou and Cumore and threatened to kill Flynn if he continued the way he was going, he still spoke highly of me.” Finally, Yuri looks back at Estelle and she feels her breath catch in her throat. “After seeing all of my crimes, you think Sodia could, in good conscience, let that go?”

Estelle felt sick to her stomach as she listened to Yuri speak, as if he had rehearsed this over and over in his brain. Was this what he was telling himself this entire time? That he deserved it? She opened her mouth to reply but nothing came out.

Yuri squeezes her shoulder once more before pulling away. “I can’t say I agree with her reasoning completely. She did it more for Flynn’s sake than anything and afterwards, she left his side and came running to me for help, of all people. And, don’t get me wrong. This isn’t me saying that I forgive her for that stunt.” His nose wrinkles in distaste as his hand slowly moves over to cover the area where the wound was inflicted. “I’m not exactly happy that she tried to kill me and I’m definitely not happy about the chronic pain from it. But if I, a murderer and a criminal, got a pardon for my crimes but Sodia, who couldn’t even finish the damn job, was punished, then I…”

Yuri trails off this time and Estelle notices how his face twitches as he stares down at his hands. “... It’s not what I want. A world where crimes like that can just be glossed over? I don’t want that. Even the pardon feels like a kick to the teeth. Knowing that people can go out and kill as many people as they want but can get off with a slap on the wrist, simply because they do one big good deed? I hate that.”

Yuri falls silent after that, glaring at the ground between them. As the silence grows between them, Estelle ponders over Yuri’s words and feelings. It wasn’t often that Yuri let his true feelings show and on any other day, she would feel rather blessed that he would open up to her like this. But knowing that he had been carrying this inside of him for years caused her eyes to well up with tears, once again.

With a tiny sniffle, she reaches out a hand and gently grasps Yuri’s before pulling it to her chest, holding it close. A few tears drop onto his skin and she made a note to apologize for crying on him later but for now, she just needed to hold onto him. To remind himself that despite it all, he was still there. He was still breathing.

“Yuri… Everything you did was… for the good of someone else…” She sobs softly, gripping onto his hand like a lifeline. “Because of you… so many innocent people got to keep on living. Don’t you understand that?”

“I do.” Yuri answers, voice barely a whisper. “I know, Estelle. I don’t regret killing Ragou or Cumore. I don’t regret stopping Alexei either–”

“Then stop it, okay?” Estelle’s head shoots up, cheeks tear stained and eyes red and swollen. “Just stop it. Stop holding it in. Talk to us.”

She just wanted him to stop hiding things. Stop mulling over everything alone. She wanted Yuri to reach out to someone if he began to have doubts. If he began to doubt someone’s intentions, if he felt like he had to kill again, she just wanted him to talk to someone. She wanted to make sure that the road that he carved out for himself wasn’t traveled alone. She just wanted him to understand that they were friends for a reason!

“...I am.” Yuri says, taking the rag back and making sure to wipe at Estelle’s tears again. His hardened gaze is gone now, replaced with a soft grin as he looks down at her. “So… you can stop crying now. Your nose is running.”

Estelle instinctively sniffles, snatching the rag from Yuri’s hand so she can blow her nose into it. Yuri gives a tiny look of disgust when she hands it back to him and she decides to take that as her tiny act of revenge against the man.

“That’s not very princess-like…” Yuri grimaces, only to flinch when Estelle punches his shoulder. “Whoa– That’s not very princess-like either! The hell is Rita teaching you over there?!”

“S-She’s… teaching me how to deal with people like you!” Estelle sniffles again, rubbing at her eyes.

“I guess I deserve it.”

“Y-You do.” Estelle manages to stop the tears but her entire face feels like a wreck. “So… so, are you going to ask me to stay quiet…?”

Yuri just shakes his head. “I’m not going to tell you what to do. It’s your choice, not mine. If you do say anything, though, at least let me know when you do so I know when to avoid Flynn’s fist.”

“You would deserve it…” Estelle mutters, earning a weak laugh from Yuri.

“I think I should go have a talk with Rita about her influence over you. This is getting scary.”

Estelle still wasn’t certain on whether or not she would tell Flynn about what happened. She wasn’t sure how she was going to be able to face Sodia either. She still felt uneasy and she knew that even taking the time to think through the situation would not yield any easy answers. The future was uncertain and was likely full of more hardships to come. But she had at least one victory today.

“Hey, Yuri…? You know you can talk to me, right? If something is bothering you? If something hurts you?” As she and Yuri begin to walk back to Flynn’s office, side by side, Estelle asks the question, needing confirmation from the other.

She knows that he won’t tell her everything. She knows that he’s simply just the type to hold in his troubles, for as long as he can. But even still, he smiles down at her, moving to bump his fist against her forehead.

“Yeah, I know.”

Even if Yuri only opens up a little bit after this, as long as he knows that the option is open…

…well, that’s just fine with her.

#startracings #tales of vesperia #yuri lowell #estellise sidos heurassein #oneshot #crest fics #angst warning #I think a lot about Yuri and his character in the game #i have opinions #i ALSO have opinions on the end of the second arc of vesperia #i have some critiques LMAO

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