#stan is gay and patty is a lesbian

[fawnedloser]

stan and patty in a lavender marriage btw

[badapesbestie]

My Loser’s Club headcanons:

Richie: ADHD, gay, hopelessly in love with Eddie, secretly a nerd, pronouns are he/him, has PTSD

Eddie: OCD, ADHD, gay, in love with Richie but keeps it to himself, pronouns are he/him, has PTSD

Ben: autistic, awkward, down bad for Beverly, special interest is true crime, cishet, pronouns are he/him, has PTSD

Beverly: cishet but everyone thinks she’s a lesbian, in love with Ben, has a great fashion sense, has PTSD, depression, and anxiety, pronouns are she/her

Bill: cis, bisexual, has a crush on Mike, has severe PTSD and depression, very protective over younger kids even if he doesn’t know them, pronouns are he/him

Mike: gay but he’s extremely good at hiding it, cis, has a crush on Bill, will do anything for his friends, severe PTSD and anxiety, pronouns are he/him

Stan: cishet, happily in love with Patty, special interest is birds (like my mom), extreme anxiety and PTSD.

They all have PTSD.

(Remember, these are MY headcanons and opinions of the characters!!!)

[piratewithvigor]

My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool 

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously. 

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged. 

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

[bowie-boy]

The Good Place headcanons even though no one asked:

Eleanor:

We stan a bi QUEEN

It’s basically canon she got so much justice

On Earth, Eleanor hooked up with people of all genders

In high school she had a girlfriend

People called her a freak but she just didn’t care, Eleanor Shellstrop was not meant for being in the closet

Her parents weren’t okay with it, which made her close herself off from other people even more

She took her friends to Pride every year though

Once found out a guy she was dating was a homophobe, dumped her drink on his head, and completely went off

(This actually earned her Good Place points)

Absolutely had a crush on Tahani when she first arrived

She was mean to her in a sort of “I like you and I’m annoyed with that” way

Out of all of her relationships, she’d never had one as special as the one she had with Chidi

Chidi:

Cishet but a STRONG ally

100% supportive of Eleanor’s bisexuality and of the rest of the group’s identities

Fought for LGBTQ+ rights at some point in his career

His best friend on Earth Uzo was also bi and got a lot of heat for it

One of the reasons Uzo and Chidi remained such close friends was because Chidi was one of the only people who accepted Uzo for who he was

Eleanor 1000% dragged him to a Pride Parade at some point, whether it have been in the Good Place or on Earth

Tahani:

I’m gonna go with bisexual

Tahani’s definitely been into some women, but up until she met Eleanor, she repressed it

Eleanor is Tahani’s role model for many reasons, one of them being that she showed her that being bi is okay

Kamilah was definitely a lesbian but never came out because she was terrified of their parents

After the art exhibition moment, Kamilah realized that being herself was more important than keeping her parents’ favors and came out as gay

Obviously Tahani was completely supportive and it helped them bond more

On Earth, Eleanor was the first person Tahani came out to

(Eleanor was incredibly excited that “now if you ever want to hook up, we can!”)

Then it was the whole group, who embraced her in a giant hug

Finally, Tahani called Kamilah

They cried over the phone together for an hour

Jason:

Jason’s a toughie but I’m gonna go for pansexual

Probably mostly only hooked up with/had relationships with girls

But him and Pillboi 👀

Jason never really comes out to anybody because he’s just so open about all of his thoughts

He doesn’t really understand the concept of hiding his identity because why would he do that? It would just make him sad

Everyone loves Jason please protect him

Janet:

Janet is pan and non-binary

The amount of times she said “not a girl” like are you really gonna sit there and tell me that she’s not

Janet never really understood the concept of sexuality until she met Jason

Since she doesn’t really see gender as being something important in a human being, once she unlocked the ability to feel romantic/sexual feelings for humans, it wasn’t exclusive to just men

Jason was Janet’s first love, so she’ll remain loyal to his memory for many Bearimies to come

Michael:

Michael is bisexual and FtM

(Firesquid to Male)

((Guys I’m so fucking funny))

He wasn’t really attracted to any humans until he landed on Earth

One of his main goals was to appreciate all earthly pleasures so you know our guy is going to experiment with relationships regardless of gender

When Michael was first trying out human suits, he tried a female one and it just felt very wrong

The male one fit him so much better and he was happy to remain in it for the rest of his existence

Being a human male just felt Right

Other headcanons:

Even Shawn would never be homophobic/transphobic to any of them, that’s evil beyond all understanding

Shawn is aroace by the way

The Judge is straight but still such an icon

Eleanor did get to make out with Frida Khalo on the condition that Chidi could with Patty (but he backed out because he got too overwhelmed) (Eleanor did not lmao)

Jeff the Doorman doesn’t care about labels or relationships, he just cares about his frogs

The entire squad went to a pride parade together and had so much fun

Michael was very excited because he got a free dad hug

Pride was among their best memories together in the Good Place

[stunt-lads]

So anyway I've had a thought for a while abt an AU where the Losers all meet up at like an LGBT/Queer group in a city as adults in various stages of being out

Bill hosts the meetup, he's a cis bisexual man and is dating Mike, his transgender pansexual boyfriend. And they make it a point to keep the group smaller. It's more for people who are worried or afraid to be out/have a hard time accepting themselves.

Stan (pansexual trans man) goes at the encouragement of his wife Patty (cis asexual woman) and they make it a point to go together frequently.

Ben is a cis demisexual biromantic man who falls immediately head over heels for Bev (who's a trans woman) at one of the meetups.

And then there's cis man Richie, he shows up in secret, like makes it a point not to be out because he's famous and terrified and hides under the "ally" label when he's occasionally spotted leaving the meetups/seen at pride parades even though he's actually gay.

And Eddie, oh man, my main man Eddie, he's a trans gay man who is doing very bad mental health wise and is coming to terms with being trans and gay after thinking he was a cisgender lesbian for a while. He's recently divorced and just wants to find other people who will just understand and remind him that it's okay to be trans and that no matter what people say he's still a man and I am absolutely projecting on eddie and if u come for me I will cry

[thepoisonroom]

losers club formative crushes on bill breakdown:

eddie - full-denial "i just want to be their very best friend and be around them all the time and have them love and trust me completely" baby gay crush. that kind of formative crush where you wonder for years afterwards if they were gay too and if it could've been anything. every time they reunite eddie gets a little tipsy and has to forcibly restrain himself from asking bill if he ever liked him back.

richie - first consciously acknowledged baby bi crush, so richie gives bill partial credit for him coming out to himself in the first place. does NOT process it until many years later when he writes a tight five of "fellas is it straight to spend all your time thinking about how perfect and broad-shouldered your friend is" dumbass baby bi material. will jokingly address bill as "hot stuff" after one drink. sometimes escalates to touching bill physically and making sizzling sounds with his mouth which they both think is hilarious.

ben - formative comphet crush that takes years to fully shake. ben thinks fondly of bill for years afterwards in a "bi men just GET it" kinda way. dumbass bi/disaster lesbian solidarity.

mike - carries a torch for bill from childhood to adulthood. goes on unsatisfying blind dates and constantly asks his friends why he can't seem to fall in love with any of them. finally Gets It when he hears bill's voice again on the phone for the first time in years.

stan - formative baby bi crush. stan's bird notebooks' margins are full of little sketches and poems about bill and at one point he wrote him a series of truly heinous but deeply charming song lyrics. rediscovers the notebooks as an adult when cleaning out his childhood bedroom and is deeply embarrassed by what a soft little emo teen he was. he shares them with patty and sometimes she'll gently bully him by quoting his emo teen poems to make him laugh when he's sad.

bev - has one of those casual "my hs ex and i are both way gay now" relationships with bill. they go buttondown shopping together then talk about how much they love ben and mike over drinks. bill always gets way too drunk and bev piggybacks him home.

[stan-denbrough]

I find it vermby tellbing that there are so many stories of stenbrough shippers being squealed at by self proclaimed “stanpat warriors” because “Stan and Patty were in love :(” and yet 99% of the fandom will actually seriously go to bat with you if you suggest Eddie isn’t gay. There are people who call themselves “Biphobic bisexuals” because they don’t want Eddie to be attracted to women that badly.

And yet, in the book, Eddie also says several times that he loves Myra. So why is it disrespectful to Patty’s character to suggest Stan is gay, why is that somehow homophobic (?) but it’s not disrespectful to Myra’s character, why is it not homophobic to screech that Eddie is actually gay because stereotypes or some shit?

Since this fandom is so toxic and petty already, I can easily turn that around. I’m going to actually chalk that up to all of you not taking Myra seriously because she’s fat. That’s it. You think she’s a comedic character, I have never seen a fic deal with the consequences of Eddie leaving Myra for Richie. 

And yet if you ship stenbrough these Stanpat Warriors (a lot of them reddies) will demand you give them a 12 page dissertation on why Stan would ever hurt his wife after he “promised he’d never hurt her uwu” and I know what you’re doing. You’re not subtle. 

Like, I don’t know, I feel like you can not throw Patty’s character out like trash and still have Stan be gay, and in love with one of his childhood friends. It doesn’t even have to be Bill. Just don’t hold us to this weird double standard because you titter that Eddie and Myra’s marriage didn’t count because she was fat and whiny and reminded Eddie of his mom and is a joke. 

Literally, I’m just telling you, that you only view myddie(?) as inconsequential because you believe so strongly in reddie, so it tells me that people are just stirring up shit against stenbrough for no reason. They have no reason to be so invested against the ship because Stan and Bill aren’t even their faves!

The rare people who unironically ship Stan and Patty, like that’s their OTP, it’s like... who are you? I don’t understand why you exist? There is one chapter dedicated to their relationship. Stan has so much more chemistry with all the other Losers, I just- what? 

Like these people aren’t even mad if you ship Bill with someone who isn’t Audra because they think she’s boring and most people hate Bill and call him cheating scum anyway. So really, there must be something I’m missing. Why are people so attached to stanpat?? Is it literally just to shove Stan off to be heterosexual in the corner while they exclude Bill entirely and write 80k words about reddie eyefucking? I mean, you could ship stanlon in that case :0 

And to clarify. I also handwaved Eddie and Myra’s breakup because I didn’t feel like writing it. I also think Eddie is gay, not bi. I’m not opposed to him being bi though. I’m not opposed to him and Myra having had a genuine relationship. Just like I’m not opposed to Stan and Patty’s marriage being legitimate. I prefer to think of Stan as gay, but it’s not the end of the world if he’s bi? 

However, I will never stop thinking the idea of gay Stan and lesbian Patty being each other’s live in beards is hilarious and super fucking valid. So if you want to cry in my inbox about that, you go right ahead sis!

[reddieao3feed]

Note to Self: Don't be Gay in Derry, Maine

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2EtLw9Y

by geicogecko

Richie Tozier's year isn't going great. She had been kicked out, earned the title of "most hated person" in her homophobic small town, and, worst of all, had accidentally gotten prom cancelled. Just when she thinks things can't get worse, four failing Broadway preformers break into her high school, a publicity stunt centered entirely around Richie and injustice and attention she hadn't wanted to get.

Really, all Richie had wanted was a chance to dance with her girlfriend.

Words: 10386, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: IT (Movies - Muschietti), The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/F, F/M

Characters: Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak, Stanley Uris, Bill Denbrough, Ben Hanscom, Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon, OKAY now take all those characters and Make Them The Opposite Gender, Patricia Blum Uris, Audra Phillips, Sonia Kaspbrak

Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon, Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris

Additional Tags: The Prom AU, Similar plot Very Different characters, Audra Phillips is kind of a bitch tbh but she's gonna get better, Bad Parents Maggie Tozier & Wentworth Tozier, LOOK I hate it as much as you do but it's IMPORTANT for the AU and they're really not in it, Lesbian Richie and Eddie, Stan and Patty are basically Richie's gay moms, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Homophobic Language, Homophobia

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2EtLw9Y

[collectinglungs]

Hello, I’m that anon who talked about Stan and Richies daughters, and since you liked it, I’m just gonna list some stuff I think would happen in that relationship:

- Richies daughter most certainly has to force Stan’s to study. So, Stans daughter is like ‘how about we just make out?’ And Richies is like ‘do your fucking algebra!’ And I am 100% sure Stans daughter would try saying ‘the Christian faith is the answer to everything’, you know, cause of all those memes of people using that as test answers, and her girlfriend would just be like ‘your Jewish, dumbass, just find what the fuck x is.’

- the first time the losers catch them making out, Richie probably told them to use protection, cause he doesn’t want grandchildren yet, and Stans daughter would just be like ‘that’s not how that works’.

- For this one, I don’t know if Stans parents are alive, but if they were, and were homophobic, I know Stan wouldn’t put up with that shit, because he loves their relationship.

- when they met at the restaurant, Beverly (who lets be honest, knew Eddie and Richie had feelings for eachother), immediately recognized Stans daughters crush, and was probably the one to try and give her advise.

- Patty is probably so supportive, and shows all of the baby pictures, much to her daughters dismay.

- They both have nightmares about Pennywise, and the losers have found them cuddling on multiple occasions after one of them had one.

- They probably both get bullied in school (probably a ton of homophobia and anti-semitism), and Stans daughter probably gets beat up weekly because she can’t keep her mouth shut, especially when someone makes fun of her being Jewish, or especially her girlfriend, which leads to Richies daughter having to clean her injury’s up all the time.

Stan’s daughter would say some shit like “praise Jesus” “ur Jewish??????” “and??” “Understandable, have a nice day���

Stan’s daughter being good at history and english while being bad at math is the gay agenda

Honestly book Stan’s parents would probably be iffy about Stan’s daughter being a lesbian/wlw, they seem like they would react like “oh it’s your life but still wished you liked boys :/“ but movie Stan?? That’s a different story

They would be blatantly homophobic and Stan would not tolerate that at all. Stan’s not a confrontational man by any means but he will make sure that his parents won’t be in contact with their family at all. (Although I’m pretty sure it’s confirmed that his parents died before he turned 40)

Patty is literally the best mom ever. She was the first person that junior came out to.

I love the idea that Patty shows Richie’s daughter, junior’s baby photos

“Here’s her in the bath with her rubber ducky” “awwwwww” “mOM”

There’s also long distance unfortunately cause Richie lives in LA and I think Stan lives in Georgia if I’m not mistaken. But they FaceTime at least 4 times a week and are constantly texting each other. Stan has to pry away her phone because she’s always texting, even during dinner and when she should be doing her homework.

[dgalerab]

Okay but what if Stan and Patty meet bc Richie enters Stan into a bird call imitation contest (I’m an environmental science major and we would 10/10 do weird shit like this so, realism) for shits and giggles and Stan’s like fuck you, I’ll do it and WIN. And he does. But then this cute lady comes up after and is like, FYI, your blue jay call was trash. And so Stan sets out to prove her wrong, because fuck no it wasn’t. And then they fall in love. Also, in my idea Patty is studying animal science.

goddddd that’s so cute but also i was thinking she and richie work together and he sees her with a girl and is like “OH!” and then stumbles his way through accidentally coming out to her as a lesbian and then going “i mean gay” and she’s just like “is this your first time coming out to anyone” and he’s like “yes but don’t worry my boyfriend knows” and she’s instantly like okay i’ll adopt this dumb gay and tells him she’s bi

(bi patty is Good because stan is the sort of person where if she was like “don’t look now but that girl is SUPER hot” he’d find a perfect time to take a subtle glance and be like “yes she is” and then they just go on with their date)

and she meets stan bc richie is a mess and she drives him home at some point and stan’s like for once richie has done me a solid, wow, and suddenly starts spending a lot of time at the bar and richie’s like “so when i, your best friend, work here, you don’t visit, but when a pretty girl does, THEN you are here every other day??? how dare you” and stan’s like “richie we live together, i see you all the time”

also richie “quietly” watching from the background as they flirt with each other and rooting for them and stan’s internally just like richie i will kill you

BUT it’d be so cute if she turns out to be working a side job while she studies environmental/animal science and she invites him to all the bird themed events and richie’s like “how are there so many bird events” and stan’s just like “because birds are cool, tell him patty” and she’s like “yeah they are” and richie’s like “wow i can’t believe i accidentally introduced you to your dream girl”

[honkhonkrichard]

some adult losers club headcannons

richie loves all of Billy Joel’s music

Richie and patty get along really well!! they’re great friends and it makes Stan Happy

Patty is a huge chatterbox and a little bit of a scatterbrain and everyone is surprised to see Stan loves her but yall

Stan loves patty so much. every time he looks at her his heart thumps and he always gives her heart eyes

And patty loves stan!!! she loves him and always has and always will

Beverly, kay McCall, Audra Phillips and Patty have girls nights!! they all meet up at a bar or they go for lunch or they hang out at someone’s house and its good. they drink and talk and laugh and its good, 

Richie is an actor, comedian, and musician, by the end of 2016 (post-IT) he has 4 studio albums, 3 comedy specials, and 78 credits (with 5 awards!!) He started out as a DJ in college, but from there he went into music and acting

Ben gets his best work done in bookstores and libraries!! He loves the atmosphere

Beverly once had a breakdown that resulted in her locking herself in her office and bursting out 38 hours later and declaring “I’M BRINGING CAPES BACK.” 

Mike collects bottles/bottle caps, as well as maps of varying types, and mugs

Richie came out as bisexual to the public in an interview in 2014

Beverly’s brand name is Firecracker

Eddie has no public shame after IT took his arm. He will say dumb shit in public. He doesn’t care if people judge him for going into an adult store. 

Sometimes kids will ask Eddie about his prosthetic arm and Eddie always happily explains that his arm got torn off by some monster who eating pushy, question asking kids

Eddie isn’t a fan of children

Richie owns 16 guitars

After IT, beverly starts to wear bolder makeup, to spite tom, who hated it when she wore anything that wasn’t nude/natural 

Richie is covered in tattoos

When he’s stressed, Mike stays late at work and reorganizes/cleans the library

Even at the the ripe old age of 40 Bill is still going through his emo phase

Ben gets really flirty when he’s drunk. He turns into the personality (see: fuckboy) he looks like he has

Mike has published a few children’s books!! 

20% of the money Beverly’s company would make goes to women’s homeless shelters and supporting women leaving abusive households

Patty went to university to become a kindergarten teacher (she was for 5 years), then she became a cop (6 years) and then she settled on a family lawyer 

Richie believes that stanley uris is the funniest motherfucker on the planet

Richie talks about Stan (or at least has so many stan stories) that people actually recognize stan in public

Richie in a 2017 interview: “I once gotta text, from Stan, that said I’m sitting in a cafe in new york and some teenagers fucking recognized me because of you You asshole I got excited I thought my accounting business hit NYC NO ITS BECAUSE YOU TALK ABOUT ME TOO MUCH and it was probably thr funniest thing he’s ever said

Stan is the richie of his work’s social circles

Mike can’t whistle

Kay McCall is a functional, distinguished lesbian. her coming out to Bev (and unfortunately Tom) is the cause of Tom firing her from the firecracker company

Stan and Patty love musicals

Richie doesn’t tan and he finds it the single most frustrating thing about himself (he burns and leaves freckles lol) 

Richie has all the social media (@RichRecords on Twitter, @Trashmouthrecords on instagram, he’s also on snapchat from time to time (but not often) and he sometimes twitch streams himself playing video games) 

He’s on instagram the most but there’s also the fun game his fans play, which is this week on Richie Tozier liked

Richie cannot dance. Neither can ben. It’s horrible.

When Stan and Patty (finally) have their baby (a girl named Daisy) Stan asked Richie to be the god father. Richie cries and says yes

Richie’s parents are buried in a private grave behind his grandparent’s Italian villa side by side. protruding out of them are stone hands holding one another

ben goes blep

Mike does a lot of scrapbooking/arts and crafts!! 

he also gives a ton of stickers out all the time. the losers club thinks he should be a teacher. He refuses this with a bashful smile. 

Mike is an openly gay man (he came out in 2002)

Mike once got a donation of $10,000 to help repair/rebuild/better the library. it was anonymous, except for the signature RT

Richie’s full, legal name as of 2016 is Richard James “Trash” Tozier 

his stage name is Trashmouth Records

Richie has his own late night talk show by the time he’s 50.

Eddie expands his limousine company (Wings on Wheels) to LA to live with Richie

Ben’s favourite video game is Minecraft. Same with Mike. They play together, sometimes, even though Ben feels like maybe it’s a bit silly. Mike always assures him it’s great

Stanley, who grew up getting visciously bullied for how he looks/skin colour, grows up to be arguably the most attractive out of the lucky 7

Patty, Bev and Richie all call each other Babe

Bill’s office is covered in sticky notes and papers taped to the wall 

Mike’s favourite song is american pie by Don McLean

Richie plays guitar, piano, saxophone and kazoo

Stan plays violin

Richie, Stan, Eddie and Mike all wear glasses

Bev, Ben and Bill make fun of them for this

ben and Bev have 3 kids together. Eileen, Elliot and jackson

Bill lives with Mike

everyone is alive and well

feel free to ask me to expand on any of these points

[butchedyke]

(for the char thing) stanley uris, mike hanlon, and patty blum

migz!!!! i’m sorry i abandoned this in favour of video games and capitalism i hope i can make it up to u uwu

this is mostly going off the movies but there’s occasional book and miniseries input- i’ve only read the first few chapters, a few wikia pages, and some character meta from the book and i’ve only seen the miniseries once vs the however many times ive watched the movies in the last 2 months so don’t expect consistency between canons

 (also i’m gonna put these under a cut because this post got really long)

stanley uris

How I feel about this character:

there is a reason i use the tag baby boy for stan (and also for miniseries eddie)!!!! he’s my favourite loser other than eddie and i want to like. hold him and make sure he’s happy and healthy and i think stephen king should treat his characters better.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

patty!!!!! their relationship in the book makes me so happy and anyone who’s ever spoken to me about stanpat knows that i am at all times thinking about how she calls his car sedanley.

that being said, i respect stenbrough, stanlon, and streddie but overall this is a stanpat household

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

stan with all the losers but especially richie! which isn’t very original since they are literally best friends but their dynamic!!! good!!!! i’ve not been able to stop thinking about that one scene from the miniseries where richie introduces stan as “this is stan the man uris, he’s a jew,” partially because it’s fucking funny because who says that richie what the fuck, but also because stan just instantly follows up by saying that richie has a high metabolism which makes him hyperactive, and maybe it’s because the miniseries is campy and a little bit shit but the delivery of those lines makes it seem like they do this a lot! they have these introductions ready to go! and i love the idea of them as a platonic package deal even if we don’t get to see much of that in the movies

My unpopular opinion about this character:

i don’t think i really have any? i tend to follow people who hold the same opinions as me tho so i have no idea what’s popular outside of that dshfk

i mean i do think fics that save eddie but not stan aren’t really fix-its and going off the amount of fics where stan’s still dead i guess that’s somehow an unpopular opinion? i know everyone’s focused on reddie rn but god like. stan is right there can we stop ignoring him pls

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

i mean the most blatantly obvious answer here is that i wish he didn’t die! he should’ve gotten to go on his holiday and rail/get railed by his wife and live to meet his friends as adults, catch up on the 27 years they didn’t get to be with each other. he should’ve gotten to have kids, once everything was over, and they should’ve been able to grow up with 5 extra uncles and an aunt bc u can’t tell me the rest of the losers wouldn’t be deeply embedded in their lives. i just wish stan had a chance to be completely, 100% happy without the underlying terror of his childhood.

on a smaller note i also wish we’d gotten to see more of his interest in birds in the movies bc like. he’s babie. and who knows! maybe would’ve helped stop the perception that his entire personality is just being a bitch that hates richie jshfd

mike hanlon

How I feel about this character:

part of the reason i wanted to read the book was for more mike content because i adore this lil farm boy and the movies. well. y’know. :). characters who just openly and whole-heartedly love their friends and go straight ride or die like 10 minutes after meeting them have my whole heart! he’s so smart and so kind and just wanted to protect his friends as best he could even though he dragged them into this whole mess bc he doesn’t want to lose them again!!!! mike deserves the whole world and if his way of getting that is by getting out of derry and getting to know that his friends remember and love him and each other then that’s all i want for him.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

i wasn’t overly set on any particular mike ship until i watched the miniseries and saw the homoerotic bike montage and now i’m fully on the hanbrough train. choo choo.

just like with stan i support stanlon but endgame hanbrough is just. it’s right there in the text. bill didn’t divorce audra for nothing in ch2.

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

this also kinda ties in with the last point, but jane @billdenbrough opened my eyes, in the middle of a very in-depth conversation about audra’s minion strap, to the world of best friends mike and audra who are both with bill which is both galaxy brained and an incredibly good concept which i think about a lot

also i think mike and ben could’ve had something Incredibly soft if mike wasn’t treated like a background character in the first film and a quest-giving npc in the second one :) :)

My unpopular opinion about this character:

i headcanon mike as gay, i have no textual evidence for this, i just think he’s neat. i think it’s a pretty popular opinion that the movies treated him poorly? and i also think that in ch2 he was just trying to protect his friends in a scenario that did not lend itself at all to protection. drugging bill and not telling the others about the full ritual might not have been the best thing to do, but he was in a goddamn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation, and he was trying his best to save his friends no matter how impossible it may have been.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

i uh :) i don’t know if anyone’s figured out yet :) that i wish many things had happened with mike in canon :) :) the first film doesn’t give him much but the second film just infuriates me completely tbqh! he’s basically entirely there to push the narrative (his dialogue doesn’t even sound like dialogue! it sounds like prose explaining the plot and the next steps the characters have to take!), or to drug and lie to his friends. i wish they’d kept his backstory the same, that we’d actually gotten to see him find his token, that he’d gotten a token relevant to him as an individual rather than the group, that we’d gotten a flashback for him, that he was given more screentime and development across both films, like... i wish he’d been treated like the other losers and not a plot point.

i also wish we’d gotten to see him on his travels post-canon, seeing the other losers, and just generally actually getting to be happy- we see the start of it but god i just want to see him having a good time outside of derry.

patty blum

How I feel about this character:

if she were not stan’s wife she would be my wife. we don’t get to see much of her in the movie or miniseries and that is a fucking crime!!!! i’ve already mentioned sedanley but like. sedanley. i’ve read patty’s bit in the book and that’s all i need the other 1100 pages can get fucked, she’s just here to watch family feud and love stan which i can confidently say is a huge fucking mood

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

STAN. i guess i already talked about this before but i’ll keep going!!! my love for stanpat overwhelms my usual distaste towards straight relationships bc they’re so good!!!!! the fact that they’re really the only happy relationship to come out of the 27 year gap and they love each other so much and so like... wholesomely? but they still blow each other’s backs out on the reg and it’s what they deserve.

also i sometimes think about patty/audra as like. kind of a crack ship kind of a “i’m a lesbian and i’m desperate to see lesbians” ship. i haven’t thought about it in depth i just want to plant the seed

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

stan introducing patty to the losers and patty becoming an honorary loser is my weakness!!!! patty being comfortable enough to rib richie (and richieandeddie) with stan, but also vice versa going along with richie’s bits. patty and bev getting close because as much as st*phen k*ng and co push bev as One Of The Boys(tm) there’s just something in having another woman around that can be refreshing especially when they’re both bicons. patty and mike enthusiastically sharing holiday pictures and tales of their trips. patty noticing when eddie’s having a bad day, whether it’s anxiety or lingering trauma, and supporting him through it, regaling him with stories about stan and what essentially amount to dad jokes (sedanley!!!) and making sure he knows he’s loved and supported by all the losers. patty, the teacher, and ben, lunchtimes-in-the-library ben who never outgrew his love of reading, nerding out over shit that the others don’t really know about. bill telling patty all about what stan was like as a kid in that way only bill can, richie chiming in with crude comments sometimes but noticeably keeping quieter than usual, and patty returning the favour, telling them about the last 27 years, and not even richie makes a single joke when everyone tears up (because he’s tearing up the most). stan sitting there the whole time not even bothering to point out that he’s right there because it’s enough for him to see the romantic love of his life and the platonic loves of his life bonding, and yeah, maybe it was worth sticking around for.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

i don’t know if this is unpopular but patty pegs. that’s all.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

more patty. let me see my wife.

[cardiganloser]

Stenbrough Wedding Headcanons

Stan takes Bill's last name because it was Georgie's too.

They do that really cheesy dove release thing cause Stan loves only two things, birds and Bill.

Stan let Richie say his best man's speech after Eddie approved it.

It is 100% honestly, totally out of the question thar Richie and Eddie vanish for an hour after a few shots and come back with messy hair and their top buttons undone.

And Eddie was totally hickey-free what are you on about?

Stan's parents don't show up cause they wanted him to marry his bestie Patty

They ignored the fact Patty was a lesbian and 100% into Audra

I love Patty and Stan being gay besties okay leave me be

They have black tuxes but Stan has a pastel blue bowtie and Bill has a pastel yellow tie

Idefk why I just love that idea

Bev packed the honeymoon for them with some NSFW items

Ben helped them choose the venue

Mike looked at wedding traditions so they could decide which ones were the ones they wanted

Eddie did all the health regulation checks

Richie helped with the vows so they weren't too boring

They throw a bouquet for fun and Eddie catches it

Richie just grins

They honeymoon in Buenos Aires

Patty booked it for them

They have a winter wedding to distance from how tainted summer is for them now

[gayedmundo]

what are your head cannons of the loser’s sexualities?

The only ones I’m really solid on are gay Eddie, bi Bill, and bi Ben. Richie in the movie is gay, but I think of book and miniseries Richie as bi. The rest I’m always going back and forth between gay/lesbian and bi. I USED to be really solid on gay Stan but then I read the book and was like ok.... ok he and Patty are cute

[shaunasshipman]

4 + stozier if you wanna!

4: Teacher/Single Parent AURelationship: Stanley Uris/Richie Tozier (Stozier)A/N: I highkey panicked when I read the word “teacher” because I thought it was student/teacher but no this is good tier

“NO! Sophia!” Stanley rushed into the class full of students. He had just picked up his daughter from her weekly guitar lesson, which was followed by an intermediate class of mostly teenagers. He watched his little seven year old duck between tall boys and girls, helpless.

The teacher- Mr Tozier, but he was cooool so he insisted his students just call him Richie- lowered the sheet work and smiled at the small, curly haired girl. “Sophia! What do I owe the pleasure?”

“I forgot my bag, Richie!” Sophia tugged on Richie’s wildly bright patterned shirt and gave him a toothy grin. 

“You did!” Richie put his hands on his hips and keep grinning down at the girl as Stan finally made his way through the crowd of students. “Well, that just won’t do! We’ll have to find it for you right away! Can’t have any missing backpacks!”

Sophia beamed as Stan came over and swooped her up in her arms. “I’m sorry, I tried to tell her to wait until the class was over to back in. Sophia, it’s rude to interrupt-”

Richie was already waving Stan off. “It’s no problem. Sophia is one of my favourite students, he can interrupt my class anytime she wants.” Richie’s eyes landed on Stan’s face and he smirked slightly. “And you are not Miss Patty. Uncle?”

“Father.” Stan replied a little stiffly. He was already tired of the questions that Richie was about to ask him, and he hadn’t even asked them yet.  “And yes,I know she’s a lesbian. I’m gay, so it’s not a big deal. We don’t make it into one.”

Richie’s mouth opened slightly, eyes going wide behind his 80s rimmed glasses. Sophia leaned out of her father’s arms towards her teacher. “It’s okay, Richie. My daddy gets mean when he thinks somebody is cute. That’s what my mommy said.”

Stan’s mouth dropped open and he felt his face begin to burn. Richie burst out laughing, walking towards his small desk and grabbing the pink backpack behind it. “Here’s your bag, little Sophia. Now, don’t be too afraid to loose it next time your daddy comes to pick you up. I think he’s cute, too.”

Stan didn’t stop blushing the whole way home. 

[whenwillthearkreturnfromwar]

1-30 gay

1. describe your idea of a perfect date

sleeping in and waking up to make breakfast/lunch together. that’s it we eat then we go back to sleep & cuddle forever

2. whats your “type”

um rly good at soccer, a literal sunbeam, dark brown hair/eyes, glows in the sun, 5′6″, makes LAME jokes but still funny, stans prince royce, softer than anyone will know, so smart and emotionally/mentally mature, hecka artistic (gives me presents!!), name is dio

3. do you want kids?

mayb? i feel like once i get a hold of my own life i could b a good mom

4. if you do, will you adopt or use some other form of child birth?

#yikes bc all adoptees i know including myself are so effed up but

5. describe the cutest date you’ve ever been on

we went to a lil cafe btw i love her

6. describe your experience having sex for the first time (were you nervous? or was it easy peasy?)

it was p funny

7. are you a morning time gay or night time gay?

night time gay but i aspire to be a morning time gay

8. opinion on nap dates?

YES idk what this is but i assume u just go and nap w each other  ? i hope? that’s literally my dream life

9. opinion on brown eyes?

LOVE LOVE LVOE LVEOV LVEO VLOVEEEE

10. dog gay or cat gay?

dog gay by default

11. would you ever date someone who owned rodents or reptiles?

idt she would ever but i guess

12. whats a turn off you look for before you start officially dating someone

if they’re a boy

13. what is a misconception you had about lgb people before you realized you were one?

they were illegal. turns out i was actually kinda right

14. what is a piece of advice you would give to your younger self

you’re gay and gonna fall in love with your best friend and u kno what it’s gonna b okay

15. (if attracted to more than one gender) do you have different “types” for different genders?

n/a

16. who is an ex you regret?

my 1st gf was super sweet and super amazing & deserves the best,, someone who will love her and treat her right . i couldn’t b that person for her bc i was in love with someone else and i still feel so bad

17. night club gay or cafe gay?

I’m gonna open a gay cafe.

18. who is one person you would “go straight” for

no one lol???

19. video game gay, book gay, or movie gay?

book gay

20. favourite gay ship (canon or not)

me & my girl… or yumikuri

21. favourite gay youtuber

idk youtubers anymore

22. have you ever unknowingly asked out a straight person?

do u think ..  with this internalized homophobia,… with this lesbian sheep mating complex whatever u call it…..

23. have you ever been in love?

yes

24. have you ever been heartbroken?

i was heartbroken when i found out san e would b featuring on hyoyeon’s wannabe

25. how do you determine if you want to be them or be with someone

i dont want to b other ppl and… i never look at ppl like this i guess

26. favourite lgb musician/band

girls’ generation

27. what is a piece of advice you have for young / baby gays

ur gonna b ok i mean it

28. are you out? if so how did you come out

yea one time in computer class this guy was like “patti are you straight” and i said “not for you lol” but p much idk? text messages to friends and idc who else knows. family was a mess tho

29. what is the most uncomfortable / strange coming out experience you have

well my parents forced me to come out to my best friend from church or else they were gonna tell her

30. what is a piece of advice for people who may not be in a safe place to express their sexuality

one day u will b able to do u… u will be comfy and happy!! dont doubt it. if u can tbh move away like im doing for college