#sqx with short hair
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junesfool ¡ 9 months ago
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mrcformoso ¡ 1 year ago
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Parallels and Details (part 2) for Paper Flowers for the God of Gods
This focuses mostly on Chapters 4-7. For Chapters 1-3, you can find it in Part 1
If you haven’t read the fic yet, this is in reference to my HuaLian fic Paper Flowers for the God of Gods! It’s a FlowerGod!XL AU in canonverse with Rapunzel vibes and Persephone & Hades vibes and an ungodly amount of flower language.
Again, OMG the response to this fic is UNREAL. Like I had to refresh it over and over because I couldn’t believe how much love it was receiving. This fic was both an emotional and mental ride hahaha because I really wanted to channel MXTX as much as possible.
If I was going to revamp the universe, I wanted to make sure that it was as detailed as possible, and so here’s another roundup of the details in this fic because The Brain Hurts But We Are Doing Our Best.
THIS IS ASSUMING YOU HAVE READ UNTIL CHAPTER 7. Please don’t accidentally spoil yourselves. It will be worth it, I promise hahaha this is mostly for me to show off point out details because these chapters got a bit emotional and just to show how much work I put in this hahaha
SMALL DETAILS - I’m a big fan of inputting tiny little details in this fic, whether it be a repeating phrase or calling out certain things that are for foreshadowing or for mood purposes
“He looked up, and up, and – oh”
The first instance of this line was in Chapter 3, during HC’s flashback: 
Hong-er, raising his arms in defense against the intruder as he looked up – and up – and – oh.
This was then repeated in Chapter 4, when Xie Lian rolled the dice and was waiting for San Lang.
Before he could even see the result, he heard the soft landing of footsteps beside him.
He looked up, and up, and – oh.
And finally, repeated one more time in Chapter 7, after HC’s confession, right before seeing the flowers on Xie Lian’s hair
1.He looked up, and up, and – oh.
Basically, it’s all instances when they were feeling extremely anxious and they look up and it’s like saying oh, there you are.
Foreshadowing phrases from flashbacks
So the first instance for example is Chapter 4 during XL’s flashback where it talks a bit about his eventual punishment and HC’s death. Those are direct quotes lifted from the actual flashback on Chapter 7. There’s also repeating ones in Chapter 6.
Capitalization and how important Xie Lian is to Hua Cheng using the power of Capital Letters.
Another thing people don’t really notice, but in Hua Cheng’s POV, he always refers to Xie Lian as his God with a capital G, but all other gods are with a small letter g, indicating the difference in how he regards them.
CALLBACKS AND REFERENCES - I love cyclical poetry and calling back events within the fic. Also, when I write canonverse AUs I love calling back to the canon, or referencing the canon in a way that makes sense in the new universe I made. I also try sometimes to add little references to other things I love.
The two deputy gods - and how important this scene actually was
In the Prologue, there was a super, super short scene where two deputy gods were walking around and one explained Xie Lian’s Gardens to the other, before they’re interrupted by HC. More than just a “haha, HC is gonna kill them” kind of thing, in this chapter it was used as a mode of world building, to establish what Heaven thinks of XL and of minor gods in general, as well as establish that HC made his way to heaven.
However, this is referenced again in Chapter 4. Because HC takes out those two gods, and it causes trouble for Qi Rong, SQX was given the opening to talk to XL about HC. This reveals to XL that San Lang’s real identity was HC (he knew there was a ghost king, and he knew the ghost king was San lang, but he didn’t know his real name)
This leads to Chapter 5 where, because he knows HC is SL, XL brings him to his territory to hide him when he couldn’t teleport out of the festival, which led to the morning reveal of Puqi temple.
Basically, the two deputies were the reason for The Confession in Chapter 7. Thank you, random characters.
Butterfly Weeds - I also think I may have traumatized all my readers from this flower.
Xie Lian’s hair has two indicators of his mood. The first is what flowers grow on his hair, and the second is the state of the flowers (the droop when he’s sad for instance).
So the Butterfly Weed Reveal™ was foreshadowed as early as the prologue. I deliberately didn’t explain what Butterfly Weeds meant because it was a setup for Chapter 6. But if you recall the prologue, XL was waiting on the bridge while looking at his reflection and this was the description I used:
He tucked his hair back behind his ear. It was Butterfly Weeds today, their small, orange buds littered the top of his head, down the length of his hair. He plucked a dead leaf from his hair, letting it fall on the river water, distorting his own reflection.
You learn in Chapter 3 from HC’s POV that Xie Lian’s hair flowers die when he’s really sad, so if you go back, it’s the first indication that XL in the prologue was Not Okay. The river distorting his own reflection was also a metaphor for his mental state and how he was not showing his Real Self.
The Blue Hydrangea
Sooo it was super quickly mentioned but the bookmark in Chapter 6:
He lifted up an old book, one with a bookmark made of a pressed blue hydrangea. 
This is the blue hydrangea that XL grew in his hair and gifted to Hua Cheng in Chapter 2:
…and in an act that surprised Xie Lian, [San Lang] tucked the Hydrangea behind his ear with a cute little “now we match, Gege!”
Which means the book came from Hua Cheng’s collection and not heaven. He literally gave the book to He Xuan to deliver to XL, and also kept the flower that XL gave him hahaha
The Page™ 
Chapter 6, the section of XL’s thoughts as he descends into the Bad Place in his mind was deliberately written in those short lines to sort of emulate the It Hurts page of the novel. I couldn’t really do that in fanfiction because this is not a physical book but I hoped it gave the same vibes.
Chapter 190™ 
There was really no reason for the human face disease and the stabby stabby but I kept the spirit of the torture XL experienced but through the shackles attached to him.
I also kept the spirit of Ghost Flame Hua Cheng unable to do anything until he burned everyone in teenager Hong-er unable to help until he started starving himself in XL’s temple while praying.
The formation of XL’s Habits
After the reveal of how Hong-er dies to save XL in Chapter 7, we see that XL starts showing the habits that we see him have in Chapter 2. That includes pacing around the perimeter, around and around until the sun sets, him looking at his own reflection in the river to see the flowers in his hair, and of course, the next point:
“It was a nice day. All days are nice.”
THE MOST PAINFUL ONE. IT HURT ME TO DO THIS.
This was actually first implied in the Prologue, but it was a more obvious repetition in Chapter 2 where each section started with “It was a nice day. All days are nice.” Initially, the implication is that it’s what he’s trying to convince himself is true (that all days are nice in heaven, therefore he is okay) But in Chapter 7 it is revealed that he started saying this after Hong-er dies. This shows that he started waiting since back then, and continued waiting the same way until he meets HC.
IT IS ALSO A REFERENCE TO THE NOVEL. It is supposed to emulate the year where XL was waiting for Hua Cheng to return. Because in this fic, XL is waiting for his devotee from his final request, and that’s why it’s the same vibe.
Princess Bride reference!
A cheeky little one. “Your wish is my command” which was first uttered by Hua Cheng in Chapter 5, brought back with more significance in Chapter 7 after XL asks him to be saved. In reference of course to the famous “As you wish” quote from the movie.
HUALIAN’S BACKSTORY - symbolisms, parallels, and running towards one another. I AM SO PROUD OF THIS. This was literally the first thing I had to flesh out of when I made this AU because the rest of the story had to be written around this and WHEN I TELL YOU the amount of time I spent making this omg –
Hua Cheng’s red string
In Chapter 3, we see that Xie Lian wrapped a vine with a lotus flower around Hong-er’s finger and he declared Hong-er as one of his flowers. Hua Cheng wears a red string now on the same spot.
Hua Cheng’s umbrella
The umbrella will make an appearance again soon! But yes, the red umbrella that Hua Cheng closes at the Prologue was the same umbrella Xie Lian hovers over Hua Cheng in chapter 3.
Hua Cheng’s name + Crimson Rain Sought Flower
THE INSPO FOR THIS FIC! Hua Cheng, literally meaning ‘Flower City’. After he dies, he changes his name to this to honor his Flower God, and tbh it holds a lot more significance in this fic.
Also, it changed the meaning of Hua Cheng’s title. Instead of Hua Cheng protecting the flower from the bloody rain, I made it so that HC deliberately protects any flower since they are considered his ‘siblings’.
“I want to be one of your flowers”
In Chapter 3, in HC’s flashback we see that Hong-er wanted to be XL’s flower when reincarnated because he wants to always be with XL. XL acknowledges this.
And although XL doesn’t put it together that Hong-er and “the teenage boy” were the same person, XL subconsciously considers him as his flower because of how loyal he was, and so XL took care of him like how he takes care of all his flowers.
And remember in Chapter 5, how XL reacted to seeing his flowers die?
Yeah. He felt that way, and mayhaps even worse, when HC died. The flowers in his hair rotted in just the same way.
“Wu Ming”
Not really done by name. But. If you notice, Hong-er never introduces himself, and Xie Lian never knew the name of his favorite devotee. I couldn’t do the “Wu Ming” thing because that was XL being deliberately cruel in the canon, and in this they have a much softer relationship.
But technically HC still becomes Wu Ming in a sense that he is endlessly devoted to XL and he sacrifices himself to save XL, so the spirit of Wu Ming is still in this fic.
San Lang (or, the three lives)
So the whole “San Lang” name in canon was a) a cheeky affectionate name (Lang is usually a term of endearment), and b) the “San” or 3 or third references the 3 lives San Lang lived (Hong-er, Wu Ming, Hua Cheng)
Now, in this fic, it means the same thing but in different contexts:
Hong-er is “reborn” as one of XL’s flowers in Chapter 3 - remember right before this, Hong-er mentions he wants to die and be reincarnated, to which XL asks “what would you like to reincarnate as” and gives him a lotus petal which means Renew, or Rebirth. This was the “end” of his first life.
Hong-er (or “the boy”) physically dies praying to XL for seven days straight without eating or sleeping. This is the end of his second life.
Hua Cheng is his third life, thus, San Lang.
Roses, Tulips, Gardenias, Daisies, Chrysanthemums
These were first mentioned actually in Chapter 3, but not by name because Hong-er didn’t recognize these flowers, but these were the flowers Xie Lian grew for him that ‘look like his red eye’. 
In Chapter 4, they were revealed to be the red flowers in Hua Cheng’s garden. Xie Lian comments that, if red, they all mean Love. And Hua Cheng says he grew it for a wonderful memory (his first meeting with XL)
Also in Chapter 3, He Xuan mentions that Hua Cheng’s communication array password is “five flowers, but he can’t remember the order”. In Chapter 4, it is revealed that these five flowers are his communication array password (BECAUSE HC IS A SAP AND WE LOVE HIM)
Chapter 6, He Xuan mentions these five flowers to basically tell Xie Lian that he’s working for Hua Cheng and to trust him when he gave The Book.
And of course, Chapter 7, where Xie Lian grew these flowers in his hair as his declaration of love to Hua Cheng. These are Their Flowers.
Paper Flowers
Of course, ½ of the title of this fic. Paper Flowers.
So this one doesn’t need much explanation. They are XL’s favorite offering because it’s not picked flowers, but it is mentioned explicitly in Chapter 3 that XL tells Hong-er not to pick flowers because they will die. So Hong-er dedicated himself to learn how to fold paper flowers.
This is also mentioned again in the end of chapter 3 that Hua Cheng STILL folds paper flowers every day and offers it to XL’s temple in Ghost City (at the end of the chapter). 
And during The Confession in chapter 7, Hua Cheng makes XL hold onto E-ming to free his hand as he sits and folds a paper flower to 1) show XL that he was the devotee, 2) fold a paper rose to confess his love and show his feelings and 3) you can say this is him praying to XL. The setting was with XL sitting on the bed and HC sitting in front of him. It’s kind of like he’s praying at an altar while making his offering.
E-ming - and the healthier relationship with Hua Cheng
So because Xie Lian saw HC’s red eye and declared it as beautiful, I made it so that HC and E-ming had a healthier relationship, and it’s shown in how HC takes better care of E-ming and treats him like a puppy.
In Chapter 5 he summarized his relationship that it started off as a curse (before XL), then it became his source of strength (After XL), and then his weapon. Chapter 7 shows that E-ming became his weapon because he wanted to forge something to protect XL in line with what he promised. His “wait for me, and I’ll come back to protect you” promise.
Role reversal
A theme I absolutely love with this universe! It’s very subtle, but it makes me soft.
In the flashbacks, it’s shown that XL is the one who took care of HC, from giving him a reason to live until he took care of him in his teens and made sure he was fed and sheltered and loved.
In the present time, HC becomes that person for XL, where XL is so sad and tired, HC became that person who brought him food, and validated him, and took care of him through their interactions.
“Tell me what you want”
Another theme I really wanted to incorporate in this universe. Related to the role reversal is the theme of asking for something that you want, and being able to give it to that person.
In Chapter 2, we have many instances of San Lang telling Xie Lian to just ask for what he wants, and we also have many instances of San Lang acknowledging any sort of request XL asks of him, even going away if XL says so (“You should go”)
Chapter 3, in HC’s flashback, we see that this came from XL doing the same for HC. Asking him what he wants. If you notice, XL didn’t tell HC to not kill himself when HC says he wants to die and reincarnate, but rather asked what he wanted to reincarnate as and then provide it.
Chapter 4, we see how XL’s wants are mostly ignored by other people (except SQX), until San Lang comes along, where he reassures XL that his wants are valid. Also, we see how XL 
Chapter 7, the big reveal that the entire time XL was doing what HC wanted before he died (“what do you want, I’ll do anything” “Wait for me”), and so HC goes back and asks XL again what he wants.
References to their canon themes
“Just one person is enough” - except here, it was one devotee praying for Xie Lian to overcome the shackles
“They’ve been running towards each other for 800 years” - in the sense that they’ve been doing things for each other and waiting and looking for each other for 800 years.
HuaLian back and forth - living for one another and meeting in the middle
MY DREAM with this fic was that I wanted to do in this fic was the constant back and forth between HuaLian. I revealed little by little their backstory over the course of several chapters in their POVs to showcase how important they were to each other, even when they didn’t really get to know each other that well.
Xie Lian gave Hong-er a reason to live by being ‘reborn’ as one of his flowers.
Hong-er becomes Xie Lian’s most dedicated believer, praying everyday and . Note, for a minor god this is a Big Deal because he has so few believers and temples to begin with.
Xie Lian takes care of Hong-er by feeding him, giving him company through flowers, and leading him to shelter, which was a Big Deal to homeless, abandoned Hong-er.
Xie Lian chose isolation over exile so that he could still take care of Hong-er.
Hong-er sacrificed himself by starving and not sleeping to pray non-stop to save Xie Lian from the shackles.
Hong-er asked Xie Lian to wait for him, because he was already dead set on becoming a ghost/not resting in peace in order to protect Xie Lian due to his own disappointment in himself.
Xie Lian, despite his grief, continued to live and wait in acknowledgement of Hong-er’s wish. He endured 800 years of imprisonment and mental torture in honor of Hong-er’s last wish.
Hong-er becomes HC and spends 800 years becoming a Ghost King and looking for XL so that he could fulfill his end of the wish.
And finally, they meet in the middle.
WAAAAAAA it’s so much but I super enjoyed writing this fic! Did you guys catch all of this in your read through? Are there other things you noticed? I have more, but they’ll be more fleshed out in the last 3 chapters!
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fortune-maiden ¡ 3 years ago
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Pei Xiu and Lady Wind Master
(also I am obsessed with SQX’s short hair here. It’s so pretty!)
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hualianff ¡ 4 years ago
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More Than This
Modern AU where famous actor HC and landscaper XL meet through a dating app. HC had a reputation of being a massive flirt who bedded people left and right, which wasn’t completely wrong–just blown out of proportion. His partners were usually other celebrities who mutually swore to keep their mouths shut in the preservation of their own images.
When HC received a message on the dating app asking about the brand of the wristwatch he wore in his profile pic (which only showcased his hands), the other user hoping to purchase a cheaper, similar style for his friend’s birthday, HC responded for the first time since downloading the app.
What could he say? The other man was gorgeous and if he were simply asking just to slide into HC’s DMs, the actor wasn’t opposed.
Turns out XL asked out of genuine curiosity. FX’s birthday was still a month away. Why XL thought about gifting him a watch similar to the one the stranger wore when XL should’ve been paying attention to the sheer strength those large hands seemed to possess was beyond him.
The name in the bio read: San Lang. The few pictures that were displayed on his profile were minimalistic yet downright sexy. XL blinked in wonder as he typed out another message, hoping to continue the conversation.
Two weeks after chatting back and forth through the app, XL asked if he could meet HC in person. The actor pondered this for a grand total of thirty seconds before agreeing to meet. XL seemed like a sincere character, someone who put other peoples’ comfort above any task at hand–if his emoticon overkill and frequent check-ins with HC were anything to go by.
HC figured he’d cross the bridge once XL recognized him as a well-loved actor starring in the hottest films in the media.
Except when HC arrived in his expensive jeep that screamed wealth, dressed in appropriate clothes for a hike with a baseball cap concealing his features from far away, XL did not have an aha! moment.
“Hello, San Lang! It’s me, Xie Lian,” XL waved as he bounced his way over. “I hope the ride up the mountain wasn’t too scary. You get used to it once you begin visiting more often. Thank you for meeting with me today.”
“It’s no problem at all. Nice to meet you, Xie Lian,” HC greets, guiding them away from his car as soon as he locks the doors, not wanting to draw any onlookers’ attention.
XL gives him a kind smile, adjusting the clasp of his bamboo hat. He explains that there are three main trails and he was thinking they could take the medium-level route. Judging from his white work-out T, jean shorts, and hiking boots, HC deduces that XL spends much time outside, even when he’s not gardening for his clients.
“Lead the way, Gege,” HC says, the title naturally falling from his lips. In XL’s dating profile, his age read thirty-two, just under three years older than HC. (This was followed by a dozen tree, flower, and water emoticons.)
“Okay! Onwards.”
Following their initial meeting, HC met up with XL numerous times after, attracted to XL’s mellow and eccentric personality. Whenever it was XL’s turn to plan their time together, he brought HC to different places each time. National parks, plant nurseries, museums–places that could be considered unconventional compared to the standard meetups from dating apps.
HC’s fondness for XL only grew because of this.
Their chemistry flourished in the bedroom as well, both HC and XL eager for giving and receiving pleasure. In addition to being fuckbuddies, they quickly developed a wholesome friendship that HC never saw coming.
But then again, this was XL. Once HC got a taste, his infatuation with the landscaper shouldn’t be surprising. HC stopped seeing his other speed dials after he met XL.
One of their nights ended by watching a film, XL mentioning off-handedly how he doesn't keep up with pop culture–including popular films–but his friend SQX had begged XL to watch this one. Of course, this had to be a film HC was in, one of his most recent projects. There was no avoiding the impending reveal.
They sit side-by-side on XL’s lumpy couch, watching the movie when XL gasps as the antagonist comes into view.
That is his San Lang! On the screen!
When XL pokes HC on the bicep, asking why the actor hadn’t told him, HC simply says that “My fame isn’t important to who I am.”
To HC’s surprise, XL accepts the answer without protest, nodding.
“San Lang is San Lang, who happens to be a marvelous actor,” XL solemnly says, flashing HC a delighted smile. HC hums in content, subtly repositioning his arm so it rested on the back of the couch, curling around XL’s shoulders.
Except after the movie ended and a google search later, XL finds out that San Lang isn’t San Lang after all.
“Should I call you Hua Cheng from now on? Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I’ve been calling you the wrong name for three months now-” XL rushes out, guilt painted across his face.
“Gege, it’s fine. I used it as an alias for my profile to protect my identity,” HC explains. He reaches forward to tuck a long strand of XL’s hair behind his ear. “Besides, I quite like it when you call me San Lang.”
“Really?” XL sheepishly asks.
“Really.”
From that moment on, HC and XL clicked perfectly, learning more about each other when time permitted them to meet up. XL felt a little foolish for not knowing who HC was as a celebrity. But like HC said, his fame did not define him as a person, which XL clearly saw from the playful way he held himself when there were no cameras around.
HC matched XL’s enthusiasm in whatever activity they were doing, even if it was something XL’s previous partners couldn’t care less about. Eight months into their arrangement, XL finally admitted to himself that he had deep feelings for HC.
While they had great chemistry as friends, XL selfishly wanted more.
But how could XL ask for something more? They already agreed to keep things casual, to remain as friends who used each other to release their sexual urges. It didn’t matter how delicate HC cleaned XL up or always ran him a bath after their climaxes. It didn’t matter how HC always set out his clothes for XL to stay the night. And it didn’t matter how close HC held onto him as they slept.
XL was simply a landscaper with a passion for nature and helping others. He wasn’t built for the limelight. He was barely in the loop with societal trends, and only recently began watching the latest movies with HC–many of which HC himself acted in.
Frankly speaking, HC could have anyone he wanted. XL was the one who should be grateful HC even sought him out a second time.
XL is thirty-three now. He wanted to find someone to settle down with, to spend the rest of his life with, falling deeper in love with every single day. He was not sure HC, who was just entering his thirties and continuing to make a name for himself, would want something like that with someone like XL.
Even when every one of HC’s actions alluded that he truly cared for XL, XL had learned that hope was a dangerous thing to mindlessly cling to. XL has had past partners come into his life, then leave him like he was nothing, like none of him was worth staying for. XL didn’t think he could bear it if HC became just another name on that list.
Furthermore, XL didn’t want to put HC or his career on spot, nor put his heart in a position where it was bound to be broken.
As XL grappled with his perceived one-sided feelings, HC only allowed himself to yearn when laying on the bed in his penthouse. It was much larger than XL’s bed. It was also much lonelier.
HC was unable to grant XL the verbal confirmation of where they stood, held back by the weight of his status, which had always been his selling point alongside his hypersexualized image. Not only did HC not want to risk pressuring XL into pursuing a relationship with a celebrity, but somewhere deep inside, HC didn’t believe XL could want him for who he is–even after the year and a half they’ve known each other.
Much of HC’s self-worth had come from his accomplishments as an actor, untouchable yet fantasized by the public. Peeling back all the layers he hid behind, HC saw his true self as too ugly, damaged, and undesirable; phrases many people in his past have spat to his face, including his parents.
In HC’s mind, he had already tied XL down to their routine no-strings-attached meet-ups. While HC savored every moment he spent with XL, he didn’t want to further intrude on XL’s simple life and have the other man resent him in the end.
《II》
(Thanks to @no-one-says-hi for helping)
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cruelsister-moved ¡ 3 years ago
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Re: mxtx - I always remember how XL refused to turn into a woman that one time but he's fine cross-dressing as one for work. Makes it even more... "interesting" that he's popularly depicted as gnc in fanon vs. his husband not being depicted like that despite actually changing forms like clothes, lol. Agree on Ling Wen and SQX, I like how they open up so many possibilities wrt gender exploration but how it was handled, hm :/ Also, wish mxtx had put more Lady ghost hc into the novel rather than one-off mention (and aside from gender, the fact that no one ever saw his real form and he apparently liked to appear differently each time... would've been fun to explore that more rather than just have XL tell him he wants to see his true form, and he's suddenly all fine with that).
Also! Very YES to the fact that you have a fantasy world here and yet, choose to limit it to rl issues... When you can lit. do whatever you want with it (not exclusive to mxtx!)
anon ur so smart <333 i love gnc hua cheng he is literally my agenda if I could draw i would draw so much gnc hua cheng... and I love the fact that he's gnc in a "both very feminine and very masculine" way rather than the way fanon gnc lian is like ohhh he's just this little soft baby the way starember draws this short pale doll with giant eyes and a delicate face and not one gram of apparent muscle strength.... this is why i support donghua xie lian supremacy because i feel like he really conveys... he isn't trying to perform or not perform anything bc after all he has been through it just isn't that big of deal plus he doesn't have the money and time. I think that really highlights how masculinity is also a performance bc people see someone just opting out of performing any gender but also not doing anything to explicitly disrupt it& take this as gnc.
MEANWHILE hc is putting a lot of effort into every part of his presentation which makes a fanon portrayal of him as gnc much more interesting to explore. and this ties into something i mentioned before which is that hc has been living his life for 800 years aware that he is a gay man, while xl has not. there is an issue in fanon with people seeing east asian men as inherently feminine, and ignoring cultural differences (e.g xie lian is not gnc for having long hair as an obvious example). however hc is a gay man presenting himself explicitly for another man and he has shown a general active desire to deliberately disrupt social rules in a way that xl has not, which i think plays perfectly into an understanding of him as a deliberately gnc person. and im interested in ur point abt his forms too - unlike xl, he has the choice to present himself as whatever he wants, starting completely from scratch, which means every choice abt how to present himself is completely deliberate so it would be really interesting to have gotten to explore that more!!
also xl is obviously pretty fine with crossdressing so it makes no sense that he won't do anything with sqx but i think that obviously comes from the fact that for mxtx, something I would see as just a really committed form of cross-dressing would actually mean he somehow Becomes a girl... which immediately makes no sense when you're presented with a character unlike sqx, who has kind of been codified as genderfluid from the get-go. like the fact that they Can change gender is presented without examining the fact that certainly for sqx they appear to enjoy it...
personally for me i ended up taking sqx as trying to portray a transfem character so then I was really upset for the ending to see her without her ability to turn into a woman and also not even really acknowledging the grief that would come with that..? it's literally just like oh she can't turn into a girl anymore so this character I wrote who obviously prefers to be a feminine woman (like evenif u compare her to ling wen who seems more ambivalent to her male form, it seems more of like a Work Thing) and she lost that so ig she's just a cis man now! like there's no reason why sqx with no powers couldn't continue to be a girl if she wanted.. thats a small slice of my feelings on the whole issue bc ultimately it presented really limitless possibility to explore and it just. wasn't.
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kaz3313 ¡ 3 years ago
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Dating Sim AU TGCF (concept) Part One
(Piccrew link in replies!).
As the title suggests- Started to make the concept of a Dating Sim AU. I’d like to make some fake screenshots (with my own drawings ^^)
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(Notes)
* Agender Xie Lian (forgot a pin)
*Ace Yin Yu (forgot a pin)
*Genderfluid SQX (didn’t forget a pin, didn’t add them because didn’t look good with her outfit/could barely see cause of his hands)
*MQ and LW both have grey/silver hair but that wasn’t an option ^^
*HC also has pointy teeth, but the smile (and the red) made him look like a vampire. Then again, thats probably accurate
*SW has long hair, but it didn’t look good on him/tried him w/ short hair.
*Dialogue may change when I make my fake screenshots- But some of it might stay the same or have similar phrasing 😊
*Haven’t decided whether HX is going to go by “Ming Yi” as an alias or just as He Xuan.
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avntures ¡ 6 years ago
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' how dreary. are you sure you don't want to go for a walk? no one'll know you were gone! ' sqx @ yeva bc she deserves the love
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          ❛  IF ONLY IT WERE SO EASY to avoid notice once i’m out.  ❜    she tries for a smile, but it’s hard to talk flippantly when she so desperately wants to say yes.  it’s been months since she left the ducal palace, but even if she were able to sneak out undetected, yeva knows better than to hope she could walk the streets in peace.    ❛  i’m afraid if cutting my hair short and painting my face with ashes didn’t work to disguise me, nothing will.  ❜
*  @oflegendaries
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hualianff ¡ 4 years ago
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Thinking about a cooking show AU where different celebrities are paired with professional chefs, becoming a team who must work together to produce the best dishes based on the following criteria of: presentation, creativity with the assigned ingredients, and taste.
Internationally renowned chef HC–who excels at various ethnic cuisines and has two Michelin stars under his belt–is paired with long-retired model XL, who now publishes poems, pictures, and stories on his growing blog.
They’re secretly husbands.
(Chef HX, also with two Michelin stars and creates bold seafood dishes, is paired with beloved contemporary dancer SQX)
(MQ, the chef with the most published culinary books and famously incorporates “lower-class” tastes into his recipes, is paired with FX, a master of several martial arts including kung fu, judo, jujitsu, and tai chi)
(YSH, a specialist in traditional cuisine using ancient techniques, is paired with popular and much sought after actor, PM)
HC and XL spend 80% flirting and 20% cooking. More often than not, HC cages XL in against the counter, focused on providing instructions rather than cooking things himself. He’s happy to ramble about random things as XL works, and XL is happy to listen to him.
Whenever XL does something particularly well, HC showers his husband with ALL the praises. As HC stands behind his husband, who is stirring the soup, he occasionally lends a hand–literally–by placing his hand over XL’s and guiding him through circular motions. When XL jokingly paints HC’s cheek with flour, HC boops XL’s nose with flour in retaliation.
Sometimes, the necklace with their wedding ring slips out from underneath XL’s collar. HC lovingly tucks it back in.
During the interviews for the in-between-scenes, they can’t stop looking at each other, and suddenly, all the viewers become third-wheelers.
Interviewer to XL: “Why do you call Hua Cheng, San Lang?”
XL easily explains it’s a special name he calls HC while HC himself death glares at the interviewer. Then, as XL goes on to explain their dish’s concept, HC nonchalantly re-ties his husband’s hair into an elaborate braid.
“San Lang’s hands are quite skilled, don’t you agree?” XL comments off-handedly, smiling behind at his sweet husband. HC smiles back, gently requesting XL to tilt his head forward–a better angle to secure the hair tie. The interviewer stutters out a nervous, “haha, they sure are” which breaks out into an awkward chuckle.
The scene cuts there.
Bonus:
During a special round, teams are switched up and required to bake desserts instead of cook. XL is paired with HX. XL requests they make angel food cake since it’s HC’s favorite dessert. HC is flat-out steaming. How can HX make his favorite dessert with his husband?
HC is paired with SQX, who wants to make tiramisu. HC thinks it’s not a bad idea at all. It’s a well-loved dessert, and they can put their own spin on the Italian tradition. Typically, HC is short with anyone who isn’t XL, but SQX seems agreeable enough.
XL mixes the batter under HX’s watchful gaze, then offers a spoonful for him to test. HC glares at HX from across the room. He uses fixing XL’s bun as an excuse to walk over, and smirks in satisfaction when XL secretly lets him taste as a reward. HC revels in the subtle sweetness of the cake batter. However, a second later, he freezes.
“Was that the same spoon you gave Black Water?” HC asks his husband suspiciously.
“Oh!?” XL exclaims, pausing his movements. He takes a closer look at the spoon, then laughs apologetically. “Sorry, San Lang.”
HC wants to vomit. Meanwhile, occupied in conversation with SQX while waiting for the tiramisu to rise, HX is none the wiser.
(XL and HC are finally caught kissing on camera in the background of the behind-the-scenes footage. The viewership skyrockets 200% by the season finale.)
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hualianff ¡ 4 years ago
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Untethered (Bonus II) 《Bonus I》
For the first time in his life, XL feels like he can speak without the pressures and expectations of being a prince weighing down on his shoulders. He watches his facial expressions in the mirror as he rambles about the various meetings he had for the day. The subtle dancing of his eyebrows, rapid blinking of his eyes, and pinched corners of his lips—all indicative of how animated he is when summarizing his duties that seemed more like work than anything else.
The fact that HC is here, brushing his hair, and listening with occasional intrigued hums make XL reinvigorated as his role as prince. Despite the demanding energy, control, and fairness the role takes, XL is incredibly grateful for the privilege and promises himself to continue to fulfill this purpose to the best of his abilities.
So far, XL believes he’s done a sufficient job, preparing to ascend to the throne. After hearing him speak, he secretly hopes HC thinks so too.
“Ah, San Lang, thank you for kindly tending to my hair. It looks wonderful,” XL says once he feels the final knots come undone by HC’s broad strokes.
“Of course it looks wonderful. It is His Highness, after all,” the pirate captain comments smoothly. XL can’t help but smile at the compliment.
HC goes to place the comb back on the vanity. He switches it out for a short ribbon that shimmers silver when hit by the moonlight.
“Allow me to do one more thing,” HC adds. He gathers all of XL’s hair to fall behind his shoulders, the strands still a bit damp. With practiced movements, HC parts the prince’s hair into three sections, then begins braiding the pieces into a thick, tight section.
XL licks his lips in anticipation. Though he’s had his hair styled a thousand times before, this is HC who currently braids his long locks, a gesture that seems a bit intimate.
Not that you mind, XL briefly thinks.
“How have the last few weeks treated San Lang?” He asks, reminding HC of his promise to talk about his days on the ocean. HC pulls the pieces of hair tighter, focused on creating a simple yet consistent and neat braided pattern for the prince.
“Troublesome. There’s a new pirate ship we have encountered several times. They said they want to challenge us for our water territories, which is a load of shit because the sea belongs to no one,” HC spits out heatedly. His tone is harsh but his touch is gentle as ever. “I honestly think the captain wants to mess with me. Make me question my reign as the ‘most feared, ruthless, and violent pirate to sail the waters.’”
“Oh. I see,” XL says hesitantly. He’s not very familiar with the inside knowledge of pirate ways and society other than what is generalized by the public. And the palace’s gossip, of course.
Suddenly, a rush of hot air tickles XL’s ear. XL locks eyes with HC through the mirror, heart stuttering at the dark, hungry look in the pirate’s eye.
“What does His Highness think?”
“Think about what?”
“My reputation. Does the real thing live up to your imagination?” HC questions with a sly smirk, quickly tying the ribbon at the end of the braid, then moving it to fall over XL’s right shoulder. XL only has a few seconds to marvel at the stunning handiwork before HC leans forward even more, urging XL to turn toward him, their faces mere centimeters apart.
The pirate captain smells like manly musk mixed in with the ocean breeze. XL nervously gulps.
“I- um,” XL starts, feeling his face heat up. “Hmm, maybe not entirely...”
HC’s eye slowly flits down XL’s face. XL remains still, mentally kicking himself for wondering what it would feel like to close the small gap and-
“Fair enough,” HC remarks, pulling away, leaving a rush of air in his wake. “I suppose I’m not the madman people say I am. After all, His Highness wouldn’t have let me into his room otherwise, no?”
Something hot burns inside XL’s gut. He had to let HC in! If the pirate were discovered by the palace guards, he’d be imprisoned indefinitely for sure! XL was simply doing an act of service for HC...nothing too outrageous like HC implied.
Nope, none at all.
“You’re blushing.“
“San Lang better take a good look around lest this is the only time I invite him into my room,” XL huffs out, resolutely facing forward and avoiding HC’s penetrating gaze.
“Forgive me, Your Highness. I was simply teasing,” HC says, though he doesn’t sound all that apologetic. “A prince like you must have many admirers to choose from. I shall not take this privilege for granted.”
“Admirers? Where on Earth did you get that from?” XL asks, appalled. He hasn’t taken interest in any of the brides his father provided, much less traveled to other kingdoms in a serious pursuit to find one to marry.
“Is there not a ball happening this coming week? For you to choose a suitable woman to become your queen?” HC inquiries nonchalantly. He tucks a rogue curl behind XL’s ear, the prince subtly leaning into the touch.
XL whips around in astonishment, braid flying to his other shoulder.
“How did you know!?”
“I have ears on land, my prince. Even when I’m out sailing the sea,” HC says. “We have also passed numerous royal ships carrying your guests for the celebration.”
XL wilts in his seat.
It’s not much of a celebration if XL hadn’t wanted to host an engagement ball in the first place. Years of his father’s insistent pushing have led to more frequent gatherings with other royalty in hopes that XL finds a fiancé.
Unlike his parents, XL wasn’t betrothed from a young age. Furthermore, he hasn’t expressed  any interest in marriage even once becoming an adult.
(“Your mother and I were married at twenty. You, my son, are already twenty-two,” the king always said. “You should quickly find a princess who catches your eye. The sooner you get yourself a wife, the sooner she will start learning her duties as queen.”)
XL has successfully put off marriage for a couple of years, deferring to his rigorous training schedule and duties as prince as an excuse. Fortunately, his mother is willing to let XL take his time, as the king isn’t set to retire anytime soon. After all, XL learning his responsibilities as king is the most important task.
HC instantly notices XL’s deflated expression. He attempts to backpedal.
“I had no right to bring that up. If this is something Gege does not want to discuss, then, by all means, he may change the subject,” HC says quietly. Respectfully.
“No. It is fine. It is by no means a secret at all. The ball has been scheduled for weeks now,” XL murmurs while looking at his bare feet. He fiddles with the long braid, smoothing over the tightly wrapped strands absent-mindedly. “I’m not actively looking for a wife or anything. At least, I don’t want to...”
“Your Highness-“
“San Lang.”
HC’s mouth snaps shut. He straightens his back with his shoulders set square, standing at attention in front of the Prince of Xianle.
“Could you do something for me? A small favor, if you will.”
“Anything,” HC immediately answers.
XL subconsciously chews on his lower lip, a habit that his closest friend SQX reprimands him for doing because it tears up both the old and healing skin. Easy to overdo, not a quick fix, SQX claims.
XL rises to his feet. He holds his hand out to the pirate, palm facing upwards.
Where’s My Love – SYML
“Will you dance with me?”
“I’m afraid gege will be sorely disappointed with this one’s lack of skill,” HC says as a matter-of-fact, but he doesn’t hesitate to accept XL’s hand, his long fingers blanketing XL’s own.
The prince’s heart skips a beat as the pirate pulls him close until their chests almost touch. XL feels small; HC’s heeled boots to XL’s bare feet exaggerate their height difference, XL only coming up to HC’s chest.
XL feels small but strangely, he wouldn’t want it any other way.
“San Lang needs only to follow my lead,” XL says, looking up with a smile. He properly intertwines their left and right hands, then places HC’s other hand on his shoulder. Finally, XL goes to hold the pirate’s waist, the thin fabric giving way to the hard muscle underneath.
“Gege must have danced with a lot of pretty women before,” HC muses, moving his feet as XL slowly guides him into a waltz. XL hopes it isn’t just him imagining a slow, romantic piece to harmonize their movements.
“Is San Lang jealous?” XL asks without thinking.
Goodness, did those words seriously just come out of his mouth? Other than his eyes widening in slight horror, XL schools his face into a calm expression, not wanting to seem conceited or even desperate.
HC peers down with a lazy smirk, almost crowding into the prince as they turn to dance in a circle. Despite XL’s effort to appear unfazed by the prospect of HC envying those who’ve had the opportunity to dance with the Prince of Xianle, the pirate still catches the hopeful flicker of XL’s eyelashes.
“A little bit. Though in a way, I’ve had my fair share of dances with Gege myself,” HC states proudly, referring back to their previous sparring sessions. The break in focus has HC stumbling over his feet, prompting XL to squeeze his waist as a reprimand to concentrate.
“Ah, yes. San Lang’s skill is undeniable in that aspect,” XL says, laughing. “He’s also the first and only man I’ve danced ever with.”
“What an honor,” HC purrs out, and then he lowers XL into an abrupt dip, holding the prince by his hip and upper back.
XL’s breath hitches, wondering how they seamlessly switched positions. HC tenderly stares down at the prince, a twinkle dimly reflecting in his left eye.
“San Lang...” XL whispers, clutching onto HC’s shoulders. His long braid feels heavy like rope where it hangs down, nearly touching the ground.
“Your Highness.”
Their faces are millimeters apart, skimming each other’s noses. They’ve never been this close before, especially not in the absence of any sort of weapon. No one besides the king and queen, palace servants, and bodyguards are even allowed to touch the prince.
Now here he is, in the arms of the infamous Crimson Rain, on the verge of letting himself want.
Tentatively, XL licks his lips before asking, “Why do you always come back?”
“Gege knows this answer too,” HC solemnly says.
XL tilts his chin up, eyelids starting to lower.
“I come back for you, my dear Prince.”
As HC leans down—still supporting XL’s weight—XL meets him halfway for their first proper kiss, alone together in the prince’s room where the pale moonlight spills through the balcony doors. It’s a light and airy peck, one that ends way too soon for XL’s liking.
When they pull apart, HC stands XL back up. The pirate notices XL’s robe has slid off one shoulder. He goes to pull it back up but XL quickly grasps his jaw for another kiss instead.
They part again.
“Just...one more-“ XL breathes out, adrenaline coursing through his veins. HC’s lips are warm and firm, easily pliable as they press deliciously against XL’s own. “...one more.”
HC gladly obliges.
Their kisses gradually pick up in pace, HC’s hands respectively exploring the span of XL’s back, his hips, and sides. XL eagerly pulls HC over to the edge of his bed, spinning them around so he can climb onto the pirate’s lap.
HC groans low in his throat, comfortably looping his arms around XL’s waist.
At this point, all of XL’s reservations have been cast aside and he’s going to act on the desires concerning a certain pirate that have been taunting him for months now, damn it.
XL surges forward with a force that knocks HC back against the soft mattress.
“Your Highness,” HC growls between kisses, still trying to cover up XL’s shoulder, and now his chest where the robe is loose enough to reveal noticeable cleavage. XL shifts a bit to align their hips, unintentionally rubbing against HC. “Shit-“
“Hua Cheng-“ XL hums, belatedly realizing his slip up. HC nips at his lip for his mistake.
“San L-lang,” XL mewls like the starved for affection prince that he is. HC’s tongue darts out to swipe across XL’s upper lip. Then, his lower lip.
XL naturally opens up for him, gasping as HC’s hot tongue licks inside his mouth with a dominance that consumes XL. The more XL lets his lust cloud his movement, the faster he feels himself harden.
When XL’s hands brush along HC’s hair, they accidentally graze onto his eyepatch. HC grunts in surprise, which has XL springing back as the situation of the last five minutes dawns upon him.
He sits up on HC’s thighs, placing his palms on the pirate’s chest. Underneath him, HC is a gorgeous vision–thick, wavy hair splayed out on XL’s pillow, lips swollen and spit-slicked.
“Oh my- oh my lord,” XL chokes out, completely breathless. “Was- was that t-too much?”
“Not at all, Your Highness,” HC replies with a rogue-ish smirk. “Come here.”
HC embraces his prince with long arms, squeezing tightly and pressing a series of kisses to the top of XL’s head. XL hesitantly rests his cheek on HC’s sternum, aware of how close their bodies are pressed together.
“Who knew Gege could kiss like that?”
“Like what?” XL questions petulantly.
“Like a shameless minx,” the pirate captain answers, chuckling when XL whines at the implication.
“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” XL shyly admits.
“Me too,” HC murmurs. XL lifts his head, crosses his arms on HC’s chest, then sets his chin on them. “Since the moment I saw you sitting alone at the pub.”
“You wanted to kiss the crown prince at first sight?” XL asks, pretending to be scandalized. HC kisses the tip of XL’s nose. XL scrunches it up in response.
“Hmm, my prince now.”
“Well, your prince would very much like it if San Lang stays the night.”
“I must be back at the harbor before dawn,” HC says, stroking XL’s hair. “However, I can most certainly afford to accompany Gege while he sleeps.”
XL happily snuggles close to HC, not worrying quite so much about the ball now that he has something going on with HC. To his astonishment, the pirate seems to return his affections quite enthusiastically. As a prince with the duty to serve his people, XL reckons he deserves this moment of happiness.
After another hour of blissful exchanging kisses and aimless conversation, XL feels himself begin to drift. He hears a whispered promise from HC who protectively curls around him.
“I will never bring you harm, Your Highness. Your heart is safe with me.”
XL falls asleep into a dreamless slumber.
***
Present...
As if it happens in slow motion, XL swings the sword with all the power he possesses. HC’s arms stretch open in vulnerability, lips forming into a small, understanding smile.
“Gege.”
Something inside XL shatters. The familiar term of endearment is for XL’s ears only. His heart pounds against his rib cage with the ferocity of an imprisoned soul, screaming at XL to ask not what he would wish for in death, but what is he willing to live for?
The answer is right in front of him.
“I’m back.”
Three things happen at once.
A deafening BOOM fires at the royal ship from the opposite direction, pitch-black flags with the symbolic skeleton of a fish piercing through the chilly air.
Simultaneously, a blinding flash of lightning strikes across the sky, signaling an even more intense downpour of rain that obscures everyone’s vision. Surprised screams echo somewhat mutely among the roaring winds.
Lastly, XL swings his sword so it barely skims the open blouse HC wears and keeps rotating until it crosses behind him, where he lets it go flying back to the royal ship.
At that moment, XL leaps forward into HC’s embrace, where those long arms encircle his waist, and both men are sent tumbling down into the crashing waves of the raging ocean.
《VI》
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hualianff ¡ 4 years ago
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Birthday Boy HC
Modern AU with police chief HC who is very dedicated to his job, especially because he grew up in a “bad” area and has first-hand experience from inadequate police service in poor neighborhoods. His co-workers and friends never see him go on second dates or have one-night stands. When HC’s birthday comes up, he insists he doesn’t want a grand occasion.
However, a simple party, he will permit.
Leave it to HX’s partner, SQX, to invite all of HC’s friends and acquaintances to HC’s own penthouse for a surprise birthday party, scheduled for the evening since HC typically works very late. When the police chief arrives home, still in his black uniform pants and red dress-shirt that goes under his suit jacket, the party is on the precipice of a full swing celebration.
HC is a bit put off by how loud and crowded his home is but it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Things are lonely, he will admit. And if this is a once-in-a-blue-moon thing, then HC won’t stop others from enjoying themselves and frankly, spoiling him.
At the height of the party, right when YY is about to present the birthday cake, SQX whistles for everyone’s attention.
“All right, Hua Cheng, time to sit on that chair over there,” SQX says while steering HC from behind, pushing on his shoulder. The chair is placed in the middle of the living room, in the perfect spot to watch the front door open.
The lights are gradually dimmed.
HC is too confused to protest. He cautiously sits down.
The front door pivots open. The person who walks through the door makes HC’s eye widen in surprise. They are dressed in all black: jean-booty shorts, stilettos, and a tight-fitting crop top. A sheer veil is also draped over their shoulders, falling gracefully behind them as they enter the room. They wear a headband with pointy horns and dark, red lipstick.
As the person gets closer, HC’s breath picks up.
“You didn’t-“ he whispers mindlessly, directed at SQX. His best friend’s partner merely holds their hands up in surrender, as if saying they did nothing wrong.
The scarcely-dressed person looks around demurely, aware everyone’s eyes are on them, ogling at their outfit that exposes lots of skin.
And then they set their gaze on HC, who sits frozen in the chair, hands gripping his thighs.
“Are you the birthday boy?” The stranger asks, smirking slightly. HC audibly gulps, not quite believing the sight of his childhood neighbor standing right in front of him, dressed like a demon summoned for punishment for his sins.
(It takes .05 seconds for HC to tent up in his pants.)
HC can’t bring himself to speak without stuttering like a fool. It’s clear that he’s the birthday boy—he’s sitting in a chair in the middle of the room, goddamn it. But for whatever reason, HC feels like he needs to respond to every one of this man’s signals.
So he stiffly nods, managing to maintain eye contact.
XL’s smirk widens mischievously, holding a secret promise behind those glistening lips. He prowls forward slowly, the click of his stiletto heels echoing across the marble floor.
“It looks like I’ve gotten myself into a little trouble,” he says with faux-innocence, slipping the veil off his shoulders. Instead of coming onto HC, XL slinks around him, letting the veil skim across HC’s lap, up to his chest, and over his face.
It faintly smells of peach.
“All right, Mr. Policeman,” XL addresses, pausing to stand behind HC. “What should I call you?”
HC breathes out harshly through his nose, desperately wanting to tilt his head back in order to get another glimpse at the angel- no, minx who has evoked the intensity of desire and lust long-buried under HC’s skin. It steadily rises to the surface, heating HC’s skin, making him feel too hot in a room where too many people remain to watch the show.
“Hmm, will ‘chief’ do? Or perhaps...sir?”
“Hua Cheng is just fine,” HC grits out. He gives in to looking behind his shoulder with curious eyes. XL’s face is startlingly close, amber eyes holding a sultry look that sends pleasure down HC’s spine.
Then, those eyes fixate on him, getting a really good look for the first time. Familiarity flashes across XL’s expression but he quickly wipes it away in favor of connecting their foreheads.
“Hua Cheng it is.”
The click of handcuffs binding HC’s wrists behind the back of the chair makes his heart drop to his stomach. He whips his head around to SQX and HX who stand off to the side. HX raises an amused eyebrow.
Somehow, SQX convinced HX to steal a pair from the office.
These are his own cuffs.
“Is this okay, Hua Cheng?” XL whispers genuinely in HC’s. When HC audibly hitches, he giggles.
“Yes.”
XL unties HC’s low ponytail to card his fingers through the police chief’s hair.
“Does it feel good?”
Fuck, XL is barely touching him, but the light brush of his fingers ignites a flame in HC’s heart, making him feel alive.
XL unbuttons the top three buttons of HC’s shirt.
“There. All ripe for the taking,” XL purrs. He drags the veil up and over HC’s face as he walks away. A strong bass pounds from HC’s built-in speaker SQX has managed to operate.
XL begins dancing for HC, swiveling his hips and rotating in time with the music. HC’s breath quickens up, his police attire also feeling unbearably hot. XL ditches the veil, and then he’s walking to HC, long legs crossing with every step.
HC is certain he won’t survive this.
***
It turns out to be nothing more than a sensual lap dance. There was no kissing on the lips, no groping on HC’s part, and no intimate touches because XL isn’t that kind of dancer. SQX knew this. He also knew HC wouldn’t want anything more than a bit of teasing anyways.
Luckily, SQX contacting a fellow friend who he’d modeled with once has allowed HC to see XL again. When he’s released from the cuffs, HC stands up and approaches where XL picks up his veil from the ground.
“Gege?” HC questions quietly. XL turns to look at him, a pink blush dusted on his cheeks.
“Oh, hello again, San Lang,” the other man greets, nearly the same height as HC with the stilettos on. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“Hmm.”
It hadn’t been either of their faults. Or maybe it was both. HC traveled to another part of the country to be enrolled in the most prestigious academy in the nation. XL moved to a different big city to pursue a degree in economics. Years of separation caused them to drift apart from best friends in high school to strangers living very different lives.
“Well, it’s really nice to see you again. The circumstances are a bit... unconventional, but I’m glad it was you,” XL laughs lightly, readjusting his headband with pointy horns. HC tries not to stare at how well they suit the other man.
XL shifts a bit uncomfortably, hugging the sheer veil tighter around his body. HC feels a natural smile curl upon his lips in hopes it soothes XL’s qualms about his state of dress.
“I’m glad it was you too, gege,” HC says honestly. XL’s face lights up like the golden fairy lights he had pinned on his childhood room walls. “If it’s not too much trouble, I ask if gege can stay?”
“Oh.”
“At least for cake-” HC rushes out, praying to whatever bastard up there that XL will say yes. “It’s strawberry,” he adds, softer. XL tilts his head in astonishment.
“I thought your favorite flavor was coconut?” XL asks in surprise.
“It is. But...I asked for strawberry this year,” HC finishes lamely.
Was he being too obvious? Would XL figure him out and be repelled? Sure, it was only a cake flavor, but what are the chances XL’s favorite is still strawberry?
XL takes his phone out of the canvas bag SQX brought to him after the dance. He scrolls for a few seconds, then quickly types something out. Turning the device back in its place, XL meets HC’s gaze with a cheerful smile.
He closes all the distance between them, a certain bounce in his step.
“I believe,” XL starts. “I can keep the birthday boy company for a little while longer.”
HC smiles widely, flashing his front row of teeth–his right canine pointier than the rest.
“Brilliant.”
***
Turns out, “a little while longer” meant talking until every last person called it a night and headed out. They catch up on all the years they missed out on each others’ lives.
Four years ago, XL adopted a daughter, Ban Yue. Ban Yue was a split-second decision when XL was a year out of university, unsure of what direction his life was heading. He says it’s the best decision he’s ever made.
“She brings me so much happiness. It was like I had a Ban Yue-shaped hole and she was the missing puzzle piece,” XL says enthusiastically. He pauses to take one more sip of his baijiu. “Does that even make sense? Hahaha….”
“It does,” HC reassures from beside him. They sit on his plush, velvet couch, holding their respective drinks with practiced form. XL leans back against the cushions, sighing in relief.
“San Lang, I knew you would understand,” he murmurs.
He doesn’t elaborate.
He doesn’t need to. It’s no secret XL’s parents would’ve disapproved of him for single-parenting a random orphan with no known heritage or background. But they were already out of the picture, disowning XL right after high school graduation when he was outed by a family friend whose advances XL rejected.
“Perhaps you can meet her one day,” XL adds as an afterthought. HC matches XL’s position, reclining against the cushions, keeping his body turned towards XL, offering him HC’s full, undivided attention. It’s a simple gesture that means everything to someone like XL.
“I would love to,” HC says.
XL hums happily, then goes on to explain that he’s a telemarketer by day, which allows him to stay home with flexible work hours that fit around Ban Yue’s school schedule. (She’s in the third grade now.)
XL also mentions that he occasionally dances at night for an extra income. Nothing too intense or frequent. Just dressing up and dancing for special occasions, at parties like HC’s. XL typically has MQ or FX babysit Ban Yue during those nights.
The word family echoes in the hollow of HC’s chest.
“Gege’s been leading a very eventful and prosperous life,” HC comments with satisfaction. He leans forward to tug the maple-red coat he lent back over XL’s shoulders, ensuring the other man stayed warm.
“Nonsense, my life is just like anybody else’s,” XL says, waving his hand in a lax motion. “But I am very interested in hearing about San Lang’s life. Police chief, huh?”
“Gege…” HC mutters shyly. Against his will, his mind replays the moment XL asked if he should address HC as “sir.”
Boners don’t get boyfriends; sexy, mature conversations do, HC tells himself.
“Please, San Lang? I won’t force you to talk too much about yourself! I know we don’t...know each other as well as we used to,” XL says, a bit embarrassed. “If you want, we can just end right now and I can leave-”
“No! Not at all, I’ll tell gege anything he wants,” HC says, scooting even closer to XL so their hips bump against one another. XL sets down his empty glass, his unsure expression morphs to contentedness.
As it should always be.
“Well…” HC trails off, taken aback by how vivid XL’s amber irises gleam as they pin HC down. “Actually, there isn’t much to tell-”
“Just tell it is how it is, San Lang!” XL laughs, reaching over to playfully bat at HC’s arm.
“Okay, okay! I’m on it.”
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