#spicy gilf

[attractthecrows]

not a solavellan in a shippy way but a solavellan in a CHEWING ON IT CHEWING ON IT CHEWING ON IT CHEWING ON IT

[simpingforclaudette]

no one will ever hate and love shigeru kimura the way i do

[lale-txt]

♡ 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐛𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐲, 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬/𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐲 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐲

@starblazer124 asked: Hi Lale! Hope you're having an awesome day! I was wondering if you'd be interested in doing a few headcanons for Rayleigh, Gaban, Shakky, and Denjiro where they have a bubbly, outgoing s/o that still gets flustered and shy easily. I just love the "socially adept person turns into a mushy puddle of goo for their lover" trope! Could be sweet, spicy, whatever you're in the mood for. My only favor would be to ask for a gender neutral reader so everyone can enjoy the gilf/dilf/milf of their dreams~

↳ 𝐰/ 𝐑𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡, 𝐆𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐧, 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐤𝐤𝐲 & 𝐃𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨

a/n: Blaze, your choice of characters is just -chef's kiss- i love little headcanons like these, so i was happy to write this request for you (after all i can never resist the gilfs/dilfs/milfs of my dreams) - hope it's to your liking! thank you so much for the idea.

❦ 𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇

even after all these years it still never failed to amuse Rayleigh how your personality switches whenever he was around

he just had this effect on you that made your brain short-circuit in the best way possible

you could be happily chatting with the crew, entertaining everyone with a story about how Roger sleepwalked once and ended up dangling upside down from the crow’s nest, swaying softly and unbothered in the wind; only for you to stutter and blush once Rayleigh’s gaze meets your from the other side of the ship 

after all, Rayleigh thought it was kinda cute and he’d tease you often when you were alone, asking you if he made you nervous while he trailed kisses down your spine to which you could only groan and bury your flushing face in the pillow

not your fault that he was just so charming and had completely captured you in his presence; the presence of a king and a lover to which you could only bow and bathe in his energy

and no matter how flustered you are, Rayleigh would always make sure to let you know that you had the same effect on him – he was just a little better at hiding it

❦ 𝐆𝐀𝐁𝐀𝐍

all it needed was a subtle touch, whether it was a hand resting on the small of your back or your pinkies linking, and your heart felt like it was about to jump out of your chest and your trail of thoughts went down the gutter

Gaban’s sunglasses would hide the mischievous twinkle in his eyes, but just knowing it was there was already enough for you to get a little flustered

at first it irritated him – how you suddenly went quiet and avoided eye contact whenever he was around, when minutes prior you’ve been your usual bubbly, outgoing self around your crewmates

that was until you stuttered out a heartfelt confession late at night, catching him off guard completely and having him turning into a puddle of goo in return

ever since the two of you have been inseparable, making each other feel like you’ve never crushed on anyone ever before

and while it sometimes was nerve wracking to react this strongly, you wouldn’t want to trade those weak knees and fluttering hearts for anything in return because it made those sweet kisses from Gaban even more exciting

❦ 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐊𝐊𝐘

slumped over the counter, your face buried in your hands, you could still hear her soft chuckle as she patted your head affectionately

Shakky really didn’t mind that you were so easy to fluster, no, quite the opposite

sometimes you wondered if she even tried to do so on purpose: when you were in some deep conversation with other bar visitors and she’d lean in close to you, whispering something in your ear, her breath hot and heavy on your skin, her fingertips at your nape

you melted every. single. time. 

it’s something that surprised you because usually you had a loose mouth and never had any troubles with starting a conversation or entertaining a group of strangers in a smoky bar 

but with Shakky… it’s like she put a spell on you that made little hearts swirl around your head whenever she was around 

and the way she pronounced your name felt like being dipped into syrup, like a sweet prayer that made you fall down on your knees - but you wouldn’t want it any other way

❦ 𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐑𝐎 

this man loves to fluster you to a point where your heart feels like it’s about to burst

he just thinks it’s cute how someone who is so bubbly and and outgoing all the time has a complete personality switch once you are alone

he’d pull you in his lap, his chin resting on top of your head, his fingers entangled with yours as he holds you close and feels your heart race in your chest

and there’s no way you can resist him, it’s like your legs turn into pudding whenever he’s near… and it’s not like you want to escape his embrace

your poor heart calms down eventually… until he starts whispering silly little things into your ear and it spikes again, making him chuckle

you can get back to him though by running your fingers through his long, blue hair and telling him how pretty he is, turning the tables and watching him blush now

after all, what’s love without a little teasing and banter until you shut each other up with dozens of kisses?

[persephoneggsy]

5, 10, 15 from fifty more rook qs if you’re doing em!

I’ve got two Rooks now (a mother and daughter pair), so I’ll answer for them both!

Left is Phryne Ingellvar (Reaper Warrior), right is Elke Ingellvar (Death Caller Mage)

Fifty (more) Rook questions!

Five. Who does Rook romance? What was the moment that sparked their interest?

Phryne romances Emmrich. A part of it is she feels the rest of the companions are too young (Phryne is 58 years old), but at the start she found Emmrich rather dashing. His intelligence and competency in his field further added to that initial attraction. Him waxing poetic in front of a display of corpses about how life is fleeting and one should live their lives to the fullest really cemented the “oh, I can’t NOT fuck him”.

Elke romances Davrin. At first she thought he was just a tough talking brute, but she softened after seeing how hard he was trying with Assan. She’s a mother to a teenaged boy, so she could relate to his frustration while also giving him some gentle advice.

Ten. A spicy scene between Rook and their LI(s):

Phryne and Emmrich are an extremely tactile couple, so they’ve always got a hand on each other at all times. Sometimes those hands wander… I like imagining a scenario where Emmrich is looking for a book and Phryne just comes up behind him, hugging him around the waist. It’s all very cute, until her hands start drifting lower; ten minutes later, Phryne’s back is against the bookcase for support while Emmrich puts those magic fingers of his to work between her legs. >:3c

Elke and Davrin are much more reserved, in comparison. Elke is very orderly and prim, so she hates looking disheveled and out of sorts… so naturally Davrin loves seeing her like that. He’ll rile her up with some flirting and teasing, until she comes storming into her room, eyes wild, and then he’ll smirk as she pushes him down onto the floor and has her merry way with him.

Fifteen. Who else has a crush on Rook?

Phryne has always been known locally as a MILF and later GILF lmao. She had a ton of young Watchers hot and bothered as she made her rounds in the Necropolis. She has a long list of ex-flings (never any serious relationships until Emmrich came along) as well. Maybe Strife looked at her and Emmrich and debated asking if they were looking for a third lmao.

Elke inherited the MILF gene from her mother, but she was too uptight and rigid for people to develop an attraction to her beyond physical. It also doesn’t help that she didn’t have a lot of friends lol. When she joins the Veilguard, I like to think Lucanis is briefly attracted to her but knows she’s turned off by Spite, so he moved on quickly.

[kakaphoe]

Baldur's Gate 3 Shitpoll Time

[milkstoner]

please tell me im not the only one who wants to see silver and granddaddy zigvolt, whos name is apparently bael/baal, have a duel because sebek's granddad is pretty much a more intense version of him (i think it's be kinda obvious now that silver has a thing for old ppl😭)

and plus, since we know that there are different faerie clans and silver is technically adopted into the vanrouge clan its like two different generation of valley warriors interacting.......i just think they'd have some spicy tension...

HYPERVENTILATES… I’m a pervert so what I got what GILF sebek x silver.

I have a feeling peepaw is super patriotic and HATES humans… he tolerates papa zigvolt, however. He doesn’t let him touch the grill during family bbqs. He hasn’t passed the vibe check like that yet. But he loves loves LOVES his half human grandchildren, don’t get me wrong. He spoils them and he pretends to see them as full fae.

So he meets Silver, little human, who has the absolute audacity to present himself as the young prince’s knight… And while Silver is adopted by a Vanrouge, it’s likely he’s not officially recognized by the clan, since he’s been hidden from everybody but Malleus and the Zigvolts, AKA he has no documentation (the lack of last name is proof of this). He’s not even a citizen in the Valley’s eyes, therefore Baal has no obligation to see him as a true Vanrouge.

Him challenging Silver to a duel would be funny but I see it😭 you think you’re on par with Vanrouge?? (Silver never said so!) you think you’re worthy of standing by the young prince?? (He never said that either!) okay then, let’s see if you can defeat a veteran. (Silver can’t.)

Obvi silver is not down but that old man insists!!! Like shit ok! He gives it his all. In the end he falls to the ground and Baal squats over him and leans super close, smug as hell. Yeah okay. He says he held back for the human child’s sake, just to rub salt in the (nonexistent) wound. Silver thanks him for the opportunity to train lol… hey that man is hot isn’t he. Bear with me. The man has stubble. No seriously HEAR ME OUT. Joseph Joestar (in part 3 of jojo) but like, green. Big ass man. Taller than Sebek (he’s going to grow to his height in time), big thighs, big chest, everything you know the man is old and well built. Barely broke a sweat. Could definitely crush Silver if he fell on his ass. All around handsome. (Don’t forget the slicked back hair) Silver couldn’t really take it in during the duel, but now that he’s in such a compromising position…!!! Baal on the other hand… fighting was a breeze, so he really took in Silver’s focused expressions, his rather impressive swift movements, the sweat on his fresh human skin… he is a charming little boy. Cant blame old Lilia for falling for him…

(had to stop myself from writing other nasty things but just know I’m imagining that gilf using silver. Will expand if I’m asked to DGFJSGFJ)

[space-pirates-archipelago]

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)?

Kvasir you bitch

Ah yes the Gilf (Glitch I'd Like To Fuck) (Don't call him grampa) (And by that I mean please do its funny)

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)?

Probably some cross between quality time and physical touch. He just enjoys spending time with Jackolis. Taking him out on dates, cooking with him, or just sitting in the library together and vibing. And then suddenly it just changes and Kvasir is showering him in kisses and physical affection. This may or may not lead to Spicy™

[pansy-gender]

I think people should stop reading interchangeable fluff made for people with the media literacy of babies.

Read another genre, read some poetry, read a novel by a historically marginalized group. If you like romance then read a book that has romance elements without that being the focus and leave the "spicy" books to their traditional audience: gilfs.

im fascinated by the spectre of booktok just because there are real life people who are calling for more books without ‘porn’ in them which begs me to question what sort of niche and elite taste i’ve been apperantly been saturated in for years that finding books lacking in sexual content is all too easy for me. i wish there was more porn in books but maybe thats just me

[clownsuu]

who's your favrite slender sibling?

trendor, splendor or offender?

Dead ass when I was little I fucking loved offender for no reason- 🧍

[diogenescynic2288]

Mild titties, spicy titties, medium titties, MILF titties, DILF titties, GILF titties, GILF titties, (one instance stands for grandma one instance stands for grandpa) (allegedly there is a term TILF for Teacher I'd Like to Fuck) TILF titties...

We like tits here. That's all.

mild titties

YOU FUCKED UP HAHAHAHAH

[mannsperson7-blog]

Anthea mint @gerph18up

[daytimemmy]

McDonald's SWAG

[menina-raio]