#specifically alejandro as steph

[legacyofwalpurgis22]

alenoah nerdy prudes must die au is plaguing my thoughts (pls pls pls go watch npmd for free on yt it's amazing trust me)

[delightfully-deranged-dagur]

HELLO!!!! i am new to this blog ajnd saw ur swap au (ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT BTW) and i saw wondering if u had a masterlist for who's swapped w/ who? (specifically the island cast) :]

Hi there! Glad you love it.

I know you just asked for Gen 1, but I'm gonna do them all anyway.

Gen 1

Ezekiel swaps with Izzy = Zeke the Wild Child.

Eva swaps with Beth = Eva the Awkward Girl.

Noah swaps with Heather = Noah the Mastermind.

Justin swaps with Harold = Justin the Dweeb.

Tyler swaps with Geoff = Tyler the Party Animal.

Izzy swaps with Owen = Izzy the Funniest Girl Around.

Cody swaps with Sierra = Cody the Superfan.

Beth swaps with Ezekiel = Bethany the Homeshooled Girl.

Courtney swaps with Duncan = Courtney the Criminal.

Harold swaps with Leshawna = Harold the Cultural Appropriater. Later Harold the Dad Friend.

Trent swaps with Justin = Trent the Model.

Bridgette swaps with Trent = Bridgette the Guitarist.

Lindsay swaps with Tyler = Lindsay the Bad Luck Jock.

DJ swaps with Bridgette = DJ the Surfer Dude.

Geoff swaps with Noah = Geoffrey the Bookworm.

Leshawna swaps with Gwen = Leshawna the Goth.

Duncan swaps with Courtney = Duncan the Type A.

Heather swaps with Lindsay = Heather the Spoiled Rich Girl.

Gwen swaps with DJ = Gwen the Nature Lover.

Owen swaps with Eva = Owen the Bully.

Sierra swaps with Cody = Sierra the Geek.

Kitty swaps with Alejandro = Kitty the Archvillainess.

Emma swaps with José = Emma the Big Sister Bully.

Katie and Sadie don't swap Roles, but swap Places with Chet and Lorenzo.

Chris swaps with Chef Hatchet = Chef Chris, Dead Inside.

Chef Hatchet swaps with Blaineley = Hatchette the Drag Queen.

Blaineley swaps with Chris = Blaineley the Hostess with the Mostest.

Gen 2

Staci swaps with Scott = Staci the Schemer.

Dakota swaps with Sam = Dakota the Gamer Girl.

B swaps with Staci = Beverly the Chatterbox.

Dawn swaps with Brick = Dawn the Cadet.

Sam swaps with Dakota = Samson the Spoiled Brat.

Brick swaps with Anne Maria = Brick the Greaser.

Anne Maria swaps with Zoey = Anne the Indie Chick.

Mike swaps with Jo = Mike the Jerk in 5 different ways.

Jo swaps with Cameron = Joanna the Bubble Girl.

Scott swaps with Dawn = Scott the Hippie.

Zoey swaps with B = Z the Inventor.

Lightning swaps with Mike = Rudolph the Nervous Wreck.

Cameron swaps with Lightning = Cam the Track Star.

Mike's alters also change accordingly.

Chester the Drill Sergeant.

Svetlana the Arrogant Athlete.

Vito the Pervert.

Manitoba Smith the Gold Hunter.

Mal the Malevolent = Ben the Benevolent.

Gen 3

Beardo swaps with Leonard = Beardo the Knight.

Leonard swaps with Dave = Leonard the Normal Guy.

Rodney swaps with Max = Rodney the Supervillain Wannabe.

Ella swaps with Shawn = Ella the Zombie Conspiracy Theorist.

Topher swaps with Scarlett = Topher the Brainiac.

Dave swaps with Rodney = Dave the SIMP.

Scarlett swaps with Sky = Scar the Athlete.

Max swaps with Beardo = Max the Human Soundboard.

Jasmine swaps with Ella = Jasmine the Fairytale Princess.

Sugar swaps with Topher = Sugar the Wannabe Talkshow Host.

Sky swaps with Sugar = Sky the Peagant Queen.

Shawna swaps with Jasmine = Shawn the Survivalist.

Amy and Sammy swap Places with Mickey and Jay.

Gen 4

The Tennis Rivals swap with The Ice Dancers = Pete and Gerry the Ice Skaters.

The Geniuses swap with The Best Friends = Mary and Ellody the Childhood Friends.

The Vegans swap with The Police Cadets = Laurie and Miles the Cops.

The Fashion Bloggers swap with The Rockers = Jen and Tom the GlamRockers.

Mother and Daughter swap with Father and Son = Kelly and Taylor, (middle class) Mother and Daughter.

The Rockers swap with The Geniuses = Rockington and Spudwell the Geniuses.

Father and Son swap with Mother and Daughter = Dwayne and Junior, (rich) Father and Son.

The Goths swap with The Vegans = Ennui and Crimson the Animal Rights Activists.

The Daters swap with The Fashion Bloggers = Ryan and Steph the Fashion Bloggers.

The Best Friends swap with The Goths = Devin and Carrie the Goths.

The Ice Dancers swap with The Tennis Rivals = Jacques and Josee the Tennis Players.

The Police Cadets swap with The Daters = Mikayla and Val the Daters. (Mikayla being my headcanon first name for Sanders)

The other teams, due to the swaps, are...

Beardo and Tammy the Larpers.

Amy and Sammy the Twins.

Lindsay and Tyler the Reality TV Pros.

Alejandro and José the Brothers.

Geoffrey and Brody the Polar Opposites.

Don, Tammy and Brody don't actually swap with anyone.

Hope this all helped.

[queernuck]

Black and Yellow Bootlicking: Penguins, Steelers, and Politics

This past weekend, the effort to #takeaknee (as expressed in hashtag) went league-wide, specifically in response to reprehensible comments made by Trump about such protests and those who make them, as well as the reactionary doubling-down upon the Warriors’ collective agreement on a decision to defer a White House visit conferred by Trump rescinding any invitation of Steph Curry to the White House. This was the same weekend where, in a sort of ironic mirroring, the Penguins released a statement confirming they would be visiting the White House, and that it was out of a respect for the office rather than the individual occupying it that they had made their decision to go forward with the visit. To tie this all together, the Pittsburgh Steelers had decided to stay in the locker room during the anthem, in order to avoid any particular display becoming part of the discussion of the Steelers’ game. However, Alejandro Villanueva, a member of the Steelers and an Army Ranger, left the locker room and went to the field for the anthem. While I do not have the money to customize a jersey to call this the bootlicking it so clearly is, plenty of people had enough to get Villanueva’s jersey, which soared in popularity instantaneously, in a fashion meteoric than the rise in sales seen by Kaepernick’s jersey the previous season. All of this leads to a question about the vital nature of these protests: what do they signify? What can they mean?

In a certain way, the Penguins announcing their White House visit the same day that LeBron James was roasting President Trump on twitter for his treatment of Steph Curry was rather appropriate. In fact, one must assume that this was a previously-made decision that simply was discussed publicly at this moment in a fashion that was perhaps too forward, a fashion where the Penguins were unable to afford themselves the luxury of questioning that the Warriors were able to maintain for a time after their NBA Finals win. Visiting the White House as the Stanley Cup Champion is a relatively young tradition, neoliberal in origin: the Penguins were the first team to visit the White House as reigning cup champs when they did so in 1991. In a statement that could easily be mistaken for bragging, they mentioned visiting both Republican and Democrat presidents, including Obama after their 2016 win. They attribute it not to a political statement, but that the tradition signifies a sort of cultural significance of the NHL within the American ideation, as an object of desire for Americans, one that is far more Canadian in character even as it is played in American arenas funded by American municipal governments filled with American fans. And indeed, that it shows a continuity from Bush, to Obama, to Trump is a certain powerful aspect of what the Penguins have done, albeit accidentally. Obama has mentioned being a Blackhawks fan in a casual fashion more than once while celebrating them at the White House, and certainly a shift away from Patrick Kane and toward Phil Kessel as the face of American hockey is welcome. All presidents are indeed worthy of the same respect, are continuing the same tradition: all, in short, are war criminals. This was not the intention of the Penguins’ statement, but the way that it specifically emphasizes continuity from Bush Sr. to Trump provides a useful extension of Baudrillard’s claim that the Gulf War never occurred: neither is there a war in Syria, no wars in Africa, no ethnic cleansings in Yemen or Honduras or colonialism in Puerto Rico or the Philippines. While the Bush regime was able to create war at will in Iraq, Trump realizes war on a global scale whether or not any “event” occurs. Afghanistan has become not an Afghanistan upon which empire is broken, the Afghanistan of the Soviet Union, but instead has been realized as the American Afghanistan that was created in order to break the Soviets, as the forever war that could only have been dreamt of by Reagan, the eternal fascist machine leaking and sputtering but continuing to drive so many flows of desire through the region.

Villanueva is familiar with the American war in Afghanistan, and he is very open, very proud of his time as an Army Ranger. Given the size of the NFL and the size of the veteran population, there was bound to be some overlap between the two, especially when one considers the massive support given to the NFL by the Department of Defense. However, the means by which Villanueva set himself apart are at their core reliant upon a reactionary understanding of the NFL, the makeup thereof, and the structure of protest within it. The original protest by Colin Kaepernick was in fact not kneeling, as the popular semiotics of protest have concentrated on, but sitting. Kaepernick did not rise for the Anthem during the preseason, and many focused specifically upon the act of sitting as disrespectful, even though it was intended to merely integrate the act of declining to stand for the anthem into the course of preparing for a game. When asked, Kaepernick specifically said that it was in response to police brutality and moreover to antiblack police brutality, and that as a black man he could not honor the flag, engage in an act of reverence for it, when it represented such suffering, such violence at a basic level. In effect, he not only affirmed a liberal concept of American exceptionalism, but demanded it be met. In a very meaningful way, this would evoke the irony with which Žižek talks about the demands of human rights: it is in invoking the law that the codified prohibition therein is exposed, along with its proscribed violation. Kaepernick had the gall to ask that the law be enforced fairly, that police not participate in extrajudicial executions, that police not brutalize black populations specifically by invoking the ideology they are held to, implied to enforce. Kaepernick is clever in this fashion specifically because his appeal relies on an exceptional liberal reading of its semiotics, but unfortunately many liberals failed and instead claimed it as an act of disrespect for the actually existing anthem. 

Moreover, the decision to kneel was specifically realized as a sort of acknowledgement of critique, formed in self-criticism: it was an acknowledgement that sitting was indeed inappropriate, or at least not the means by which Kaepernick wished to make his protest, and thus the decision to kneel was made. In sports, kneeling largely designates attention, presence, is used as part of an act of showing respect. Kaepernick was going through a declaration of the exact sort Žižek describes, one that specifically defies norms by demanding their imposition in a direct, open fashion rather than in assemblage, as part of a greater structural violence. The violence the police are codified through requires a specific act of violation-of-prohibition, an exceeding of the prohibiting standard, a series of unspoken rules much like those found in sports surrounding the ideology of what is “acceptable” rulebreaking. The referee is unable to catch every infraction, and moreover certain infractions are justified within the bounds of retaining the flow of the game. By demanding enforcement, it calls attention to the character of this violation. The resonance of Kaepernick’s protest was not with the structure at hand, but his supposition that they were in fact at all present: his refusal to accept the admonishment in the preconceived structure in turn lead to the violence he faced.

Meanwhile, Villanueva violating the actions of a team during a weekend focused upon “unity” as a non-presence, not as solidarity but as a proscribed lack of disunity, is a turn of the same sort as seen by the Penguins. When Trump called players protesting the anthem “sons of bitches” he crossed into making kneeling acceptable specifically because it could be reterritorialized as opposing Tump in generality, as a showman rather than a meaningful continuance of the structure of Obama’s neoliberal violence. The shifts that Trump has made are indeed violent, are indeed fascist in character, are worrying, are horrifying. But to not acknowledge that these are fundamentally relating to war in the same way as Obama, as a largely structural preservation of American hegemony as an arbitrating agent, far more optimistic about the successful occupation of Iraq than the continuing occupation of Afghanistan, one finds a certain cultural agency around Trump that preempted Kaepernick. When the Browns knelt together before the season during the anthem, it was an expression of solidarity that indeed rang true as discussing police brutality. But the continual evocation of the veteran as a figure in discussions of Kaepernick’s protests, the way that players like Kiko Alonso of the Dolphins were leveraged against Kaepernick, were all focused upon the neoliberal appropriation of a symbolic action on Kaepernick’s part. Many teams made apparently-united displays, and for the Steelers’ part, that was going to be through not taking the field and allowing head coach Mike Tomlin to serve as a spokesman. But Villanueva, knowing that he would be voraciously supported, violated this in favor of imperialist ideology, of enacting a certain kind of violent rhetoric. To claim that he did not expect this is ridiculous, in that it underestimates him in the exact same sort of fashion that Kaepernick was underestimated. Where Kaepernick, however, demanded the deterritorialization, demanded a questioning of the simulacra represented by the anthem, the flag, there was a simulacrum of resistance built into Villanueva’s actions that was as superficial as that of Alonso and the Dolphins beating the 49ers after Castro’s death, as former players like Ray Lewis changing their mind on protesting after Kaepernick is out of the league, of team owners mentioning a vague right to protest, of players being forced to preface any opinion with an overcoding of hegemonic, imperialist ideology. Players like Michael Bennett are unable to even discuss their own experiences with police brutality until they pay proper attention to the ideology of police work.

Hockey is an overwhelmingly John Tortorella, coach of the Columbus Blue Jackets, gained a great deal of attention when he was asked soon after Kaepernick’s protest about what he would do if any Team USA players decided to sit for the anthem during the World Cup of Hockey, replying that they would be benched for the game. He then proceeded to coach one of the most embarrassingly bad men’s teams ever iced by USA Hockey. Meanwhile, Sidney Crosby of the Penguins would go on to win the cup that year, and largely remain silent about the obvious racialization of his championship win and the celebration thereof, despite growing up in the midst of deep racial violence in Cole Harbour. In fact, his comments were limited to discussing the honor of visiting the White House, as if it could be separated from its neoliberal character as a ritual first practiced by the Penguins themselves. Crosby may not be American, but he certainly fits well into the ideology here.