#speaking of which they have to stop using all that slang i can barely understand them

[wonderviolet17]

how many times do you think vampires can say “ugh kids and their new slang these days” before they realize that the language has adapted to the point that they can’t understand what anyone is saying and no one can understand them

[macravishedbymactavish]

Kindly Worded Text Message (BestFriend! John "Soap" Mactavish x GN!Reader)

TW for swearing, relationships ending, and Soap is a chaotic best friend with your best interests at heart

| Blog HQ | Modern Warfare 2 Masterlist |

You laid on your bed, phone thrown to the side somewhere. You stared up at the ceiling, willing the pain in both your heart and your head to go away.

You were due home from this deployment in 1 month (to the day), due home to him.

Him who just ended your long term relationship over text.

I'm sorry. This isn't how I wanted to go about this...but the love has run out for me. I need a partner who's here, who's physically present. I know you've done all you can to fill the gaps, and try your best. But I feel more alone with you, than without. Best of luck, and you'll always have a special place in my heart.

It was a kick in the teeth; mind you - a very nice kick in the teeth; but hurt all the same. Which left you laying here silently crying and hoping nobody walked in on you. Which you've been lucky so far, it was a Friday night before a weekend leave - barely anyone was on base.

"Hey! Come help me convince LT that coming out with all of us tonight is good for him. Human interaction and all that shite"

Well. Except for fucking Mactavish. Your very loud, knows no boundaries best friend. Who stopped dead in your doorway when he saw you.

"What's wrong?" You pulled in a deep breath, attempting to wipe your eyes in the most discreet fashion possible before sitting up and smirking at the man in your door.

"You really think you're going to convince Ghost to go out to the pub with everyone?" You chuckled, stomach tightening when he didn't react. A look of concern plastered across his face.

"What's going on?" You really didn't want to talk about this. Considering Johnny lives for these nights off, a night to embrace all the good that he can get out of this world. Telling him about the (kind) break up text you received would ruin the excitement he built.

"You know how many cats and dogs are -" you started, watching as his eyes rolled.

"Are sleeping all alone in shelters and have no homes or humans to love them" he mocked you, hearing this excuse a million times to cover up the real reason you're upset. "Really. What's going on? I'll stand here all night, I'll make it weird, " he shrugged, leaning against the doorframe. You lightly glared at him,

Stubborn fuck.

"I'm now single, not sure about the mingle. Might eat some pringle" you shrugged, watching as his expression flashed to one of amusement before returning to concern.

"He dumped you over a video chat?" You awkwardly shook your head.

"Phone call?" Your bottom lip ended up between your teeth as you watched frustration and disappointment flash across his features.

"No. He dinnae break up with you over a text. Did he?!" You knew the frustration wasn't directed at you. But it brought back the pain from earlier, iliciting tears in your eyes again.

"In his defense, it was a very nicely worded text message." You watched as Johnny turned slightly, mumbling slang you didn't understand to himself. Shoulders stiff.

"I'll be back. You're not allowed to go anywhere" you nodded slightly. Watching as he turned out of your room, still cussing and growling the same angry slang to himself.

You couldn't hold back the laugh when you heard a distant speak English from down the hall, though.

--

You were drying your hair following your warm shower when you heard the door to your room open.

Just let yourself in why don't you?

"Aye, where'd you go? I told you not to go anywhere, " Johnny called out, causing you to pout to yourself. Is he really not going to the pub with everyone?

"I just took a shower, chill. Why aren't you out with everyone? You were so excited, don't let me hold you back" you wandered in the room. Seeing a pile of both of your favourite snacks on the bed.

"You're not holding me back. Ghost refused to go, so I changed my mind" you arched an eyebrow, but humored him nonetheless. Eyes scanning over the pile of snacks, small smile pulling at your lips.

"All this for me?" You asked, watching him flop backward onto your bed. Noticing he changed into a different tee and sweatpants.

"No! Some are mine. Don't get greedy, " he teased, swatting lightly at your hand before patting the bed beside him. "What are we watching?"

You took the remote from his hands, scrolling through movies. Mind starting to wander as the titles flashed by. That much time and commitment ended through a text message? Sure, he was polite, but a text? Tears started to well up again until you were pulled from your thoughts with a:

"Could you hurry up and pick already?" With a soft laugh, followed by a soft "ah, no" as a stray tear fell down your cheek.

Arms slipped around your middle, as you let the emotions run their course. It was silent, except for the occasional sarcastic comment about he's a daft bastard for giving you up and the offer to go light his lawn on fire.

"Arson? Really?" You laughed at Johnny's last comment. Earning a shrug, as his chin remained on the top of your head.

"He didn't have the balls to break up with you face to face. He doesn't deserve grass."

Taglist (shoot me a message if you want to be added): @bloodonmyhands-1221

[x-authorship-x]

how do the narutoverse characters all speak the same language? i get it if its in the same land / village, but another land / village ??? how do they understand eachother?? do they have the same universal language or do they all speak the same language?

... i'm definitely nit-picking now. if only i could learn to be a normal human being and stop having existential crises with these question~~~ ♫

Also technology is wack in Naruto, wdym you send messages thru letters but you guys have phones, emails and television??

Well... for a given understanding of what exactly is the "same language" and a forgiveness of regional dialects, varying literacy, and colloquialisms... Everyone speaks Japanese in Canon.

I don't know Japanese and I haven't watched/read the manga/anime so I couldn't say if the Japanese used is consistent across characters or anything. Also I'm not looking for anyone to kick down my ask box to info dump on this

In my fics, I lean into varying accents and local colloquialism in order to give a sense of varying regions, class, culture, etc etc. However, writing in English is very different from writing in Japanese because... well, I don't speak Japanese so I know the vibes of 'why' but I literally can't explain it.

Shisui speaks like a perfect Clan kid from the heart of Konoha; Raidou is from the same place but his voice is rounder, less polished, and he might have shared some "rougher" slang with his Squadmates since he's the only one who grew up in a working class civilian neighborhood.

Kisame has a different accent to Shisui (Kiri compared to Konoha) but they are totally fine with communicating because they've both had a high level of village-centred education that teaches them how to talk, how to speak, and how to blend in. Kisame has therefore been trained out of his rural dialect/accent (later on in this AU, some of you may notice that Zabuza has stubbornly held onto his).

When Shisui was undercover in Lightning's rural areas, he altered his accent and manner of speaking to better blend in.

The Crows speak in a way that is totally different to Humans. Shisui, as a fluent but obviously non-native speaker, uses much more basic language. There are noticable translation issues (no word for 'Hokage' so they use 'Hat', they never use Human Names, Akira isn't Akira's 'true name' but rather the Human equivalent used for functionality) which emphasises that the Crow language is completely distinct from the Human's.

Let's get back to Canon (🙃)

People can speak the "same language" and not be able to understand a word the other person is saying. I know a woman who's husband's family were from a different village and the in-laws could barely make small talk because they were so heavy on the slang, which absolutely did not translate to the other region's slang.

In Narutoverse, there's some stuff to consider off the top of my head

One, it's an anime, Kishi has too much timeline to forget and insane plot decisions to introduce to bother with linguistic nuance and do this idea justice so - as far as I'm aware - he didn't do language variation in canon.

Two, I think if Shinobi villages had their own languages, it would be something treated more like a hidden code than used casually, domestically, or be ritualistic in important events etc. I do think there'd be a shared 'higher' language at least, for treaties and Daimyos and shit, even if the rural farmers didn't know it even existed. And this means Shinobi would know it too.

Three, texting. Can the rural farmer own a cute little flip phone with a few attached charms? The world of translation would surely open up at least, although that doesn't mean dialects or different languages would disappear

Again, I'm not a linguist and i have no interest in being one!

The idea is cool tho

(every time I answer an ask, I tell myself it'll be shorter this time and yet...)

[louistory]

Intro post

Hello, I wanted to make this post to make a sort of comeback into the fandom. i don't really know how active it may be now so bare with me.

Basics :

Name: Anaïs ( pronounced [a.na.is]) Gender: Female Age: 28 Country: France Languages: French and english

About me :

- I've studied english and art history (first year only), then IT - I work as an IT Technician, but I've previously worked in the service industry (as a cook and as a waitress) - I enjoy writing, reading, hiking, quiet nights in, autumn, coffee, music and quite a lot of TV Shows - I'm not a native english speaker, I can speak and understand most written and spoken things, but I will obviously make mistakes (especially between US and UK words/slang)

My One Direction History

I used to have a One Direction dedicated blog when I was 16 up to when I was 22/23. I can't remember the name for the life of me, but I wasn't a popular blogger. I have been of fan of theirs since I was 16, it actually began because of Mr.X trending on twitter (if you all can remember this tale...) I then saw the livestream of their MSG performance and I was hooked (I mean, I just heard "I want" and decided it was an amazing song lmao). I went to two concerts, one in 2013 for the Take Me Home Tour, and one in 2014 for the Where We Are Tour. I consider myself incredibly lucky for that. Definitely was a Louis' girl, and still am to this day. To be honest I had horrible teenage years. They were my rock during this difficult time. I dedicated so much time to watching/listening to them, I even learned how to speak english just to be able to read fanfiction about them. I gradually stopped listening to them as much after their "pause", especially because their last album Made In The AM was really difficult for me to listen to. It came out on 13/11/15, which is the same date as the Bataclan attacks in France. I listened to the album to calm down the anxiety that day and then couldn't listen to it anymore as it reminded me of that terrible day. It is still difficult now, especially with "If I Could Fly" (which I sadly really love)

Why this blog ?

Liam's passing made me realise how much I missed my boys and how much I still loved them, and this tumblr community. So I decided to come back and see if it was as active as it was back then. I hope I'll get to make some new friends, please don't hesitate to talk to me I will gladly respond.

Other information :

This is a sideblog, my main blog is here so if you follow me on here I will follow you back with this username. Dividers are from this lovely tumblr user

[allthemenofmydreams]

Can You Please Shut Up- Trent A-A

English is not your first language, even though you know a lot and can easily speak and even understand some of the English slang, there is not a day that goes by that you don't miss talking to someone who speaks your native language. Even when you have been living in England for several months it is sometimes difficult to get used to the different accents. But especially your boyfriend's accent.

As much as you love him, sometimes you find it very hard to keep up with him, especially when he talks and talks and talks and talks and no one can stop him. You have no problem with him telling you about his day and so on but when he talks excitedly it's like watching a movie in Chinese, you don't understand. That day you had a bad day in college, all you wanted was five minutes of silence. The problem was that a very animated Trent had picked you up that day.

You didn't know what he was talking about because from the moment you got in the car you switched off your bilingual mode to see if it would lessen your headache. Which didn't work because you exploded.

"...and then I said..."

"Can you shut up!" you said sharply, causing him to stop talking and stare at you. He didn't say anything, although you knew you had hurt his feelings and maybe he had gotten a little mad.

After a couple of minutes of driving, he arrived at the house they shared. You opened the door and headed straight to the living room without saying a word. You went to your room took a quick shower to relax and feel better.

You went to the kitchen because it was time for dinner and asked Trent:

"Do you want pasta or rice? He didn't answer, his eyes still on the TV. Did you hear me?

You approached him, took control, and turned off the TV.

"I'm talking to you!" You told him a little angry because he was applying the silent treatment.

"Well, you were the one who told me to shut up," he answered calmly.

"Yes, about two hours ago. And because you wouldn't shut up and your accent bothered me."

"My accent? since when is my accent a problem to bother you and shut me up?" he stood from the couch, his voice sounded a little hurt.

You knew that your choice of words had not been the right one and that if you didn't fix it soon things would get out of hand.

"It's not a problem," you said quickly.

"No? 'cause for what you have said it looks like it is" He was getting angry, by the way, he was playing with his hands you knew he was struggling to control himself. Now you were sorry you hadn't thought things through twice before you spoke, even though you said things without intending to hurt him. You did.

"Babe," you said trying to soften the mood and Trent. "Let's be honest, sometimes your scouse accent is a little annoying.... don't get me wrong. I love you, but when you tell me how your day was and stuff like that for someone whose English is not their first language it's hard to follow you. Especially because you don't even finish the words! Sometimes listening to you talk is like playing guessing games. There are times when I know what you are telling me or asking for the words I understand but there are times when I don't understand them. Plus the way you speak is a mix of rushed and calm."

Trent remained silent. You knew it wasn't to ignore me, but he was thinking about all the times he asked me or said something and I just answered "Yes" because I didn't understand him but I was embarrassed to tell him to repeat things. Sometimes he would look at me confused by my answer and repeat things. You kept on talking.

"I'm sorry for shushing you earlier, I've had a hard day at uni and I needed a little bit of calm. I know I was wrong to do so, but don't be mad at me, what would you do if you only heard me speak in Spanish and could barely follow me...on a bad day."

"Maybe I'll do the same...But next time tell me what's wrong with you, don't shut me up like that."

"I won't!" you promised, wrapping your arms around his waist. Hugging Trent was one of the things you loved the most, his strong chest where you rested your head and his strong arms pulled you closer to him.

"And next time you don't understand me, ask me again. Don't answer me yes, when it doesn't make sense," you both let out a little laugh.

"I promise," you said giving him a quick peck.

[jostepherjoestar]

Ah I was sitting on this idea while waiting for requests to open! I loved your ask that had La Squadra meeting Risottos daughter from the future that got me thinking what if La Squadra had a memey s/o from present time? Would they ask lotta questions about the future and get confused when they speak in vine or tiktok references? 😆

La Squadra with a meme-y s/o from the future

gn reader // sfw

ahh that was such a cute ask and glad it made you think of this idea! thank your for requesting this and omg so so so so sorry it took so long, hope you’ll still enjoy it none the less! 💖✨ (you and your LS bf have a good comprehension of each other’s timelines and are used to traveling back and forth a bit :D)

Risotto

He knows the complications are endless and at times it all seems incomprehensible- having an s/o who can literally time travel; but your sheer knowledge of memes and the way you seem to effortlessly drop them into everyday conversation is astounding to him.

He doesn’t understand them that well, no amount of context or explaining will help. It’s simply a language he does not understand that well. And the memes or slang he kind of does understand, he just doesn’t find that funny. 

However, he will never actually find it a bother when you drop a few weird jokes. The way they make you laugh and sometimes even dry-heave from the hilarity makes him love you even more. 

In moments like that he’ll dryly let out a few slang words he remembers. You will never forget the time he let out a serious and deep “yeet” when you were already hysterically laughing, his addition might have made you stop breathing for a minute. It still makes you grin when you remember him shaking your shoulders and telling you to “breathe dammit!!”

Overall this man does not really get it or find it that entertaining himself, but he’ll gladly tease you and make you smile with the stuff he picks up. Risotto just can’t stop staring at your beaming grin.

Formaggio

Although he doesn’t truly grasp the layers of certain jokes or memes, Formaggio is your man! He’ll start using jokes and memes he learned from you and is so pleased when he makes you laugh with them. 

Formaggio is great at continuing a bit but once he loses interest he just...stops. Which is kind of perfect since your knowledge of vines is a lot bigger than those of tiktoks so those quick six seconds are easy to get the point across. 

He’ll still get some stuff wrong but he gets the gist of them. He loves annoying his teammates with his newfound references and they all can’t stand him. The second he opens his mouth with that smug look in his eyes, they all sigh in unison and prepare for the incomprehensible babbling that’s about to commence. 

The rest of the gang likes you but when you and Formaggio are hanging out at headquarters together, they tend to keep conversations quick because they know once you two team up, the suffering will never end. 

“Babe, wake up! New meme just dropped!” 

You two are a menace to deal with but god if it isn’t sickeningly cute and funny when he calls you his baby, his cinnamon apple!

Illuso

Don’t get Illuso wrong, he loves you but dear heavens you are on thin ice with him. He isn’t the most joke-y type, he likes a good chuckle but please do not oversaturate him with references he does not get. 

He has little to no interest in the videos you wish to show him and even less interest in remembering the ones he begrudgingly watched. 

At this point you’re allowed a couple jokes a day, he doesn’t count or literally prevent you from saying them, but you know each other well enough to see when he’s actually getting annoyed. 

To shut you up he’ll try and fluster you! He’ll look into your eyes so intensely as you continue talking about a meme, one eyebrow cocked and one side of his beautiful lips curled up into a smug grin. 

He’ll place a single hand on your cheek, his thumb gently swiping across it while the rest of his large hand and fingers rest on your scalp. As he hears you stumble over your words and can feel your cheeks heating up he’ll get in nice and close to your lips. Ghosting his over yours and placing a single kiss that you wish would last longer. That’ll keep you quiet for a bit 😌

He accidentally (re-)invents “that’s cringe” without your help. (he’s referring to you, sorry bestie)

Prosciutto

Why are you saying these weird words AT him? Why must you crease his brows even further?

Prosciutto’s patience is getting tested with you and your innate need for adding incomprehensible colourful commentary to everyday things and situations. He truly doesn’t get it and there is no amount of explaining you can do to change his mind. Even after the memes make even a little sense, he won’t find them funny.

He does love you, so much in fact, that he knows asking you to stop isn’t going to work and it wouldn’t be a fair thing to do. He sees how your smirk feeds into the satisfaction of landing a joke in your present time where most of your friends know what you’re talking about. 

However when you come around his part of the space time continuum, playtime is over. Well mostly. He does enjoy being a bit goofy around you, his snarky comments get a sarcastic edge that parallels your need for adding a fun flair to mundane things. 

The only time you made him laugh with a meme was when you kept repeating “i can’t believe you’ve done this” over and over while poking his cheeks during a playful mood. After a final poke, Prosciutto’s resolve finally breaking, he couldn’t help but snicker. With one final addition of the line, ever surprised by the wonderful sound he makes when he finally breaks, you stop and stare. Enamoured by your wonderful boyfriend and his gorgeous smile. 

Pesci

He’s the most supportive partner out there! Anything that makes you laugh and giggle, like the memes you keep showing him, fills his mushy heart with joy. 

Pesci will kind of get them? They all make sense in a way, but some of them just go above his head because of the layers of internet knowledge he does not possess. Although he really loves it when you show him stuff that reminded you of him.

🥺🥺🥺🥺 <-- his face the entire day after you show him cute pictures of animals and said they made you think of him. He’s just so in sickeningly smitten with you.

He’ll try out a couple of internet slang terms and blush really badly when they make you laugh. If Pesci could, he’d play your laughter on loop 24/7. Him baby, ok?

When the whole internet was debating their existence and that of every object because everything is cake, you quizzed Pesci on his cake-recognizing skills. He failed horribly, they all looked way too realistic and he might have had a small existential crisis. 

You playfully bit his wrist to show he wasn’t made of cake, planting some kisses along the sensitive spot. He shivered at your tickling pecks, relieved he wasn’t just a tasty confection and even happier that you’d love him regardless. 

Melone

Your meme comrade. 

The first mistake was showing him what the internet was like in your future timeline. He got so invested in its machinations and the entire culture surrounding it. He studied every single social media outlet. Every niche he could find only fuelling his curiosity. 

Pandora’s box has been opened and there is no turning back now. Not only does he get all the memes and vines you show him, he memorized them too. Melone will artfully display his knowledge in daily life when you’re around and show off.

Do you regret showing him? Maybe...but is it hilarious to hear him quote terribly long copy/pastas? Yes. Yes it is.

He will steal your phone so he can feed into his meme needs, saving the most fried up images that barely make any sense, to your gallery. You sorted the ones he saves into a special folder so you wouldn’t have to strain your eyes so much. 

It’s all fun and games until he starts referencing stuff during more intimate times. At first they made you laugh but as time went on you had to ask him to stop. 

Hearing Melone whisper “eeby deeby” while kissing his way down your neck might not be the mood you’d preferred. (hearing him sigh and say “so, no head?” was pretty hilarious tho)

Ghiaccio

To your surprise, once he understands the memes and gets the references, he becomes quite good at using them as well. Steering clear of the misspelled ones, of course. (one bad gloop might actually kill him)

Ghiaccio is such a big softie once he’s alone with you, letting his guard down and finally calm, not irked or stressed by his surroundings. 

He loves it when you show him new weird pictures you saved because they made you think of him. You don’t allow him to have a smartphone no matter how much he wants it (it’ll mess up sensitive time stuff) so when you’re scrolling through your preferred meme gathering app with Ghiaccio alongside you, he’ll point out ones and snicker a “that’s you”. 

It makes your heart melt how cute he can be with the stuff he picks out. Once he actually said “you’re baby” and you felt your soul leave your precious body as his cheeks turned redder than plush tomatoes in summertime. 

When he’s around the rest of the squad or in a more public setting, the usual stressors return. But with you around to offer quick witty jokes, things tend to become less focused on irritation. 

You are 100% sure you’ve heard him yell the famous words “AM I WRONG?!” during a heated argument with Melone. You had to leave the room to prevent worsening things, holding in your laughter and silently dying as you heard him rave on. 

[dinner-djarin]

dar'manda (Mando x f!reader insert)

Prologue

(Inspired by this scene)

Summary: You've been working as a merchant on Nevarro for years now, only out of necessity. Life really wasn't going your way. At least until the Mandalorian came by your booth. Now he's all you think about, and soon he'll be even more.

Warnings: Probably some swearing (real and in universe), violence (eventually), smut (eventually), No use of Y/N, slowburn/fluff (for the first little while)

Notes: Takes place at the end of season 1, and will mostly take place between season one and two. I have been sitting on this for a while due to some fear about reception by the fandom, but honestly I just need to stop thinking about it so here we go. She's going out into the world, and I hope you enjoy. (Also I wrote this prologue like 2 months ago so it isn't quite where I'd like it to be but if you read this please just stick with me, I swear my writing gets better lol)

You don’t know how long it’s been since you last saw him. Weeks? Months? But you can’t get that damn tin can out of your head.

You really have no reason to be this hung up on him. He’s barely spoken to you, you’ve never even seen his face, so it should be easy enough to move on from whatever childish infatuation you have over him. Right? Maker, what kind of person crushes on a mask and a suit of armour?

But there’s something about him, something that keeps him planted in your subconscious. You’ve tried to find the words to explain it, but nothing ever comes close. You can't even begin to understand how this man has completely overtaken your every waking thought.

He used to come by every couple of weeks, and you’d savour every delectable minute of the interaction, but that was all before shit hit the fan of course. You weren't there to see it but when you came back to work the next day it was all anyone could talk about.

“Apparently the metal man broke some Guild rule, and practically all of the other bounty hunters tried to kill him for it.” You heard over your shoulder. As much as you liked to keep to yourself, you couldn’t help form eavesdropping on a conversation between merchants. You did have a guilty pleasure for drama, probably to fill the uneventful void that your mundane life had now become.

“The Mandalorian? He broke their code then!” one exclaimed.

“I heard he went back for a bounty,” someone else whispered.

“What could make someone do something so stupid?” questioned a merchant lady you already didn’t particularly like.

“He doesn’t strike me as stupid,” you interrupt, trying to stick up for the man you were currently enamoured with. “If he did it, there must be a valid reason.”

“If he did it?” She sneered. “Do you not see the damage he left behind? People will be out of business for sure. It’ll take weeks to clean up the mess he made.”

“Then I guess I hope it was worth it. That it wasn't in vain.” You state, putting an end to the conversation. You hoped the man – that you already liked against your better judgement – wouldn’t cause so much harm without some justification.

In the wake of his rebellion, a covert of other masked hunters revealed themselves, shot up the town, and then vanished without a word. And so did your Mandalorian.

Woah hold on. Not yours. Just one random Mandalorian that you’ve said a handful of words to and have harboured a secret crush over.

From the second you saw him you pretty much knew you were screwed. Between the husky modulated voice, and the broad as hell shoulders, there was pretty much no way to quell the instant attraction that rose up in you. His presence alone was suffocating. Nothing could stop the way your vocal cords tightened to the point of forcing out a soft squeal at his sight. The whole time he talked to you, you could feel his visor latch onto your body – pinning you to the spot.

You thought you might find some relief when he left. Quite the opposite. You couldn't help but gawk at the way his body moved, like he knew he was hot shit. He took your damn breath away. And you were glad to know that he couldn't see your lips part to let out a soft moan, or the way they pursed back together as you unconsciously swallowed the suddenly copious amount of saliva pooling in your mouth. Fucking delicious, you thought, shamelessly.

Maybe it was the fact that you knew he could take anyone down in milliseconds. He was untouchable, and this latest defiance proved that. No one crossed the Guild. Well, no one crossed the Guild and got away with it. But if anyone could, it would be Mando.

And there’s another thing. You don’t even know his name. Which means that you’re forced to call him the colloquial slang that is commonly used by outsiders of the Mandalorian culture. “Mando”. You couldn’t help but think about how it almost sounded like an insult, especially when slurred from the mouth of other criminals. You hated the way people spat the word out at him, obviously trying to get him worked up; to see what he was made of. It made you desperately wish that you had a better name to call him, his real name. An intimate piece of knowledge that you could hold on to, something of him that no one else had.

Maybe that made you selfish. Even so, there was so much you wished you knew about him. He was a complete mystery.

To be fair, he probably didn’t even know your own name. You can't recall him asking for it, or if you ever introduced yourself. You were pretty much a bumbling mess the first time you met him. To the point where even if you had tried to say your name it probably would have sounded like you were speaking Huttese. Although, who could blame you. It wasn’t very conventional to introduce yourself to every customer. The people on Nevarro usually kept to themselves, especially the bounty hunters. There wasn’t much room for ‘customer service’. But damn you wish you had tried to make some sort of introduction. Even if it had come out as incoherent nonsense, you think it may have made talking to him later a bit easier.

However, none of that matters if he never comes back, and you bet he won’t. He’s smarter than that. To pull what he did, he’s probably on the other side of the galaxy right now.

Even so, you’ll miss the shared awkward silences and stolen glances that came with each of his visits. Whenever he’d come into the shop, he’d list off what he needed to stock up on, using the most deep and captivating voice you think you’d ever heard. If he hadn’t had that helmet covering his face, you’d swear he stared right into your soul as he did so. It almost made you weak in the knees every damn time. You’d then rummage through each supply crate and gather the best quality of every item, and finally – just to bring your humiliation to an all-time high – you’d give him a discount for absolutely no discernible reason. He took notice of the reduced price the first time and thanked you, only for you to be berated by your boss once he left. Eventually, to your dismay, the niceties came to a halt. Maybe he forgot what full price was, maybe he just couldn’t care less.

Either way, it looks like you’d risked your job for the last time. It’s a shame. For a planet full of bounty hunters and hardened criminals, there’s actually not a lot to entertain you. A shootout here, an escaped bounty there, but nothing that satisfied your desire for an exciting lifestyle.

The closest you got to that would be each time some wide-eyed, eager, wannabe-bounty-hunter strolled through town looking for a chance to weasel their way up the ladder of the Guild. They definitely thought they were more important than they actually were, and they always made a point of showing off for you. Not that you were anything special, just the closest thing with cleavage usually. They’d probably brag about their rank and their kill counts, things you could not care less about. A few of them actually had the balls to ask you out, but it usually only ended in a free meal or drink. To be fair though that was very intentional on your part. It was fun to play the part of a flirtatious girl from the market for a while, and almost exciting to think about how you were completely screwing over those assholes.

Over the time you’ve spent alone in the galaxy you learned exactly how to read those kinds of people. You knew just how far to go, just what to say or do until you got what you needed. As much as you weren’t a fan of physical affection, you often brushed your target's arm or thigh, played with their hair, or if the situation really demanded it – madeout with them behind the cantina. But you always made a point of stopping before things got too far. You may not be a complete saint, but you knew none of the scumbags you met were worth your time.

You wouldn’t have allowed things to go any further. Not with them. Going any further could only be a letdown, and you were fine to take those matters into your own hands…. literally. You may be a complete flirt, but only as a skill to survive in this grimy and dangerous galaxy. You learned early on that being young and female was a vulnerability. That was at least until you discovered how that vulnerability could be shaped into one of your most valuable strengths.

When you think about him though… well something about him made your entire badass facade disappear into thin air. You lost any cool you had the minute he walked past your vendor. Not to mention that there was something else about him that told you he’d see right through it anyway. Maybe it was the visor. Some special setting to read the level of bullshit.

As far as you’ve seen, he doesn’t take anyone’s shit. He definitely isn’t the type to make others feel comfortable in a conversation. He says precisely what he needs to get his point across, nothing more. Never once had you heard him use more than 10 words at a time.

On a few occasions you were lucky enough to end up in the cantina at the same time as him. Whether you were on a break or entertaining some dead-beat for free lunch, you remember how fast your heart would beat when the glint of his helmet met your vision. You wondered if he noticed your presence, or if he even recognized you away from your vendor at the market.

One time you were in the next booth over. Your spine straightened, and your whole body shivered when he slid into his seat and placed himself directly behind you. The proximity was electrifying. It made every neuron in your body fire rapidly and your blood vessels pump impossibly fast. You were probably supposed to be listening to the slimeball buying your drinks drone on about how impressive his last capture was, but the baritone emanating from behind ensnared every ounce of focus you had.

“I’ll take the highest pay” he muttered through the modulator.

“I do have other hunters, Mando. I can’t always guarantee you get the best of the lot.” replied his employer. A smile maintained on his face even when confronting an unforgiving barricade.

“I’m sure you do. But high price means high risk.” Mando responded. His employer’s confused silence forced him to continue. “Those skilled enough to take on the bounties know better than to do so.”

The Guild leaders' laughter bounced off the walls making many patrons turned their heads, while others continued their business, obviously being used to this behaviour.

You were left puzzled in that moment, completely baffled by this interaction. It wasn't until much later that night when it finally clicked. Although you didn’t know exactly how ranking in the Guild worked, you knew Mando was up there. He had the status to strike fear into almost every other bounty hunter he outranked. Mando had staked his claim long ago, and no one in the Guild was stupid enough to try and take a bounty from him. If he wanted something, he was going to get it.

You’d remember that interaction vividly. Not only because of how close you were to the Mandalorian as you overheard it, but also in service as a reminder to you, proving just how dominant he was in this world. He held power over every member of the Guild, including its leader, whether he wanted to admit it or not. You felt idiotic for not instantly understanding the control he wielded wherever he went. Sometimes it's a wonder how completely oblivious you could be.

Although you certainly were not oblivious to the drastic upgrade he got just before leaving. If you thought Mando was intimidating before, his new head to toe silver armour was sure to strike fear into any of his prey. You remember thinking you saw his reflection pass by earlier in the day, but he quickly dissolved into the shadows, as he often found a way of doing. However, later that night when you had just gotten off from work, he strolled back into the cantina for a new batch of bounties and all eyes were drawn to him. Most eyes were filled with jealousy since – as his employer made clear – he completed the job none of them could. They were probably even more enraged by the fact that he wore his reward back into the room, when most of them would have gladly taken that metal to the highest bidder and sold it for a hefty profit. However, you saw him differently than the rest. Your eyes were fixed on him in fear and in wonder. This metal man, already a force of nature, just became that much more impossible to defeat. As if anything could get to him before, it was clear now that no one could reach the Mandalorian.

But again – it doesn't matter. Not a single soul on Canto Bight would bet his shiny ass walks back into this sector. Not unless he has some kinda death wish…

Turns out he has some kinda death wish.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1 is up now!

More notes: Hello there! I hope you enjoyed this lovely mess. I'm not the most proud of it, but I do want to continue this story (which I know we've all read 100 iterations of by now). Either way, I'm having fun writing it, so I might as well post it!

I'd love a like or comment if you'd be willing to share, I'm very new to writing so I'd enjoy any constructive criticism (especially on the first few parts, I know they need work, but at this point I just want to stop thinking about it and continue on with the story). Also this will be ongoing, so if you wanna keep reading feel free to drop your @ in my inbox or in the comments and I can tag you when I update!

So long for now my fellow helmet whores!

[midgardsbest]

Imagine: You feel a bit off today and the argument with your boyfriend Loki doesn’t make things better. What happens when a Steve who doesn’t understand British slang and an overprotective father ruin your sweet plan to get him back?

N/A: Hello dearests, enjoy this new Loki x reader imagine and tell me what are your impressions about it. If you wanna. If you don’t then DEATH. TO ALL OF THEM. Jk. Hope y’all got that reference. 🤟

Warnings: BestFriend!Natasha, Thor is lovely as usual, Dad!TonyStark, Boyfriend!Loki, Language, Fluff, Angst and more fluff, a bit of passion, and British reader/use of British slang (pretty easy and self-explanatory)

Words: 1953

Waking up that morning was tremendously hard. You stumbled against any piece of furniture installed inside of your room by your father, Tony Stark. Well, he was your stepfather, technically, but you weren’t particularly fond of the use of that word.

Yawning your way into the kitchen of the compound, you avoided meeting eyes with Steve. He had been more stressed than usual in the last few days, probably given the upcoming mission. He lashed out at you the day before, or at least that's what you thought was happening.

"I think a cuppa would serve you right."

"A what?"

You looked at him as if he were stupid, but you knew it couldn't be that. "A cuppa? It's.. a cup of tea. You don't know that?" Given his expression, either he was a bit dumb or was just done with you for that day. "No. I like coffee. But thank you."

You weren't mad at him, of course. Nonetheless, ignoring him for a bit did sound like a better idea than trying to cheer him up with your British manners, if you could say. He did not look happy about that.

Staring at the emptiness of your black coffee (and almost gagging at the rough taste), you swallowed the smothering ache in your heart. What was it you were yearning for?

You couldn't place in your mind the exact reason behind this suffering, but you soon grew tired of it. With a pair of eyes following your figure left unnoticed, you dragged yourself up to your room to somehow get ready.

"What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know man. Shouldn't you be locked up in your room like Stark- and he's gone. Thanks for the chat, popsicle."

This was boring, wasn't it? It was raining outside. Perhaps if you were in a rom-com you'd be soaked wet, lightheartedly dancing with a cover of dreamy clouds in the sky, glancing at your boyfriend from time to time, pretending you didn't see his "this is the woman I'll marry" eyes consuming you entirely. However, you weren't the protagonist of a rom-com, much less of a poorly written fan fiction. Additionally, your dear boyfriend wasn't officially... well, your boyfriend, and he'd been ignoring you completely. Which hurt, but your pride defeated your consciousness and you didn't want to talk to him about it.

Then, an idea took place in your mind. You had an opportunity to get back your not-much-of-a-boyfriend, the Captain's shy smile and your fun. Some might say even something more along the way.

"I AM DONE. COMPLETELY, UTTERLY DONE."

You slammed the door of Natasha's office, ignoring the frightening look she gave you and pointed to the chair right in front of you with questioning eyes.

"You slammed my door shut, might as well."

Your eyes dropped unnoticeably. Someone would have noticed though, only he wasn't there.

"I gotta do something. Would you help me with it?."

"What would I help you with, exactly? Y/N, if this is one of your unsettled plans..." She leaned back on the chair, tapping the desk with her bare fingernails.

"No! You can trust me on this, Nat. Please do. I'll buy you some nail polish."

"What?"

"What?"

"WHAT?" Tony on the verge of an anxiety attack wasn't exactly how you thought this plan would go, even though him finding out was not part of it as well.

"Boss, your heart rate is increasing critically."

"Vacation's over. FRIDAY, let's go back to the compound."

You could hear their voices on the other end of the line.

You still didn't utter a word, already having made the mistake of asking your dad when he was bound to return from his "job thing" in Rome. You shouldn’t have said that, because "you never care about it", so it was either a party you were planning or a date. Besides, you might've mentioned the mission that you later remembered, you weren’t supposed to know about.

Your leg was trembling now, having realized the crap mistake you made. "Well shit."

"Y/N!"

"Oh, forgot you were still on. Love you, Dad, bye."

Natasha gawked at you, shaking her head slightly, arms crossed in front of her. This plan was a massive mistake. But it was your plan and you wouldn’t give up on it.

Around noon, Stark made his entry into the structure and went straight to your room, knocking on the door half a time and anchoring his feet to the ground with every step. Hiding your uneven breath, and thanking Nat for her wise advice ("just play sick", she said), you raised the sheets over your painted red nose.

Your dad searched for you in your cosy bedroom, just to find your teary innocent eyes full of greed for success. Maybe you did have a fever.

"Sweetheart, why didn't you tell me you were sick? I thought you were gonna run off to a party or something you kids do."

You shifted under the covers. Shit. That was the plan after all. You were going to coerce Steve into partying with you somewhere you knew Loki would find you, like perhaps that club just around the corner where he wore that leather jacket once. Big story. Regardless, it didn't mean much now that he just vanished from your life.

"I wouldn't have gone anywhere."

An aching cough caught your breath. You tried to keep your eyebrows from furrowing at the actual symptom. You never got sick. Not really, at least.

Tony's eyes were clouded with worry, not liking the sight of you in pain.

"This is what we'll do, kid. You get some rest and I'll have Steve make you some tea."

You sniggered: "Just don't call it a cuppa."

As soon as he left the room, Natasha came out of the bathroom. Your eyes felt heavy, but your mind was still somewhere else.

"You'd make a great actress, has anyone told you that?" she grinned. You liked Nat, especially when you knew she was comfortable enough to enjoy spending time with you. She was your first real friend here at the compound. Your father would keep you hidden here when you were younger, and even though he tried his best to never make you feel like you were alone, he wasn't around much, and always left you with Pepper or Happy, who you now knew as your mother and uncle.

You coughed once again, this time harder, and brought a hand on your chest.

Nat stared at you for a little while.

"You're ill."

"Yeah. And the sun's coming out. This day just couldn't get worse. Did I just manifest getting sick?"

When she stood up from the little chair that was at the side of your bed, she gave you a comforting smile, and then she left, leaving you in Morpheus' arms to fall asleep.

"Do you think perhaps it is best to wake her?"

"Don't be foolish, brother. She is much better like this."

"You mean she's comfortable?"

"I mean she's bearable."

"Ughh."

"Perfect! Lady Y/N, you seem to have awakened."

You looked at the Norse brothers standing at the feet of your bed, still feeling dizzy from your remarkable nap. You hadn't slept this good in a while.

"Thor. Yes. Woken u-uh..p." You stood up. You looked at them. You glanced at them once again.

"OH MY GOD." You quickly covered your face with your hands. Gods, Loki was in your room. He wasn't looking at you, but he was in your room. You could feel his coldness reaching up to your veins - and heart, not only making you feel sick in your stomach but also causing a complementary shameful headache.

"Is uhm... something wrong, Y/N?" Thor's warm voice grounded you slightly but never enough.

With a shallow breath, you released your hands, dropping them along with your head. Looking at the silk white sheets, you wondered if strangling yourself with them would solve anything.

"No, thank you, Thor. Could you just give me a minute to uhm... I need to uh... powder my nose."

He smiled. "Ah yes of course. We'll be in the kitchen."

Your breath hitched. You had to do something.

"Wait!" They altered their steps, this time you looked directly into Loki's ice-blue eyes. "Gotta speak. I mean- I- 'd like to speak to Loki. For a minute. If possible."

Thor adjusted the weight on his feet and then nodded, sizing the room with his comfortable aura.

The instant he left, that same energy vanished, leaving you and that subjugating man to war. A conflict formed of rivalry, an uneasy sense of fear for all that was yet to be said and a deep, desperate need for each other in all ways known to your kind.

You soon grew tired of the dreadful silence. "Are you gonna say anything or shall I speak first?"

"Speak." He kept on staring at the window.

You debated if getting out of the bed would be better for this argument.

"Don't. And there will be no such thing as an argument. I'm not going to force your decision."

You blinked at him. What? Did the ice get to his head?

"Pardon? What decision? And who gave you permission to read my mind, Loki? You left me. Alone. You didn't speak to me for a week. Like... out of nowhere. Just like that- What. Decision." You did get out of bed, now showing your white lace robe to him. If he were looking at you, you'd have felt naked under his gaze.

He kept silent for a while and you did not once stop beholding him.

"I thought you wished not to see me again." He finally witnessed you, completely, entirely, just like you knew he would. Just the way you longed for.

"Why? When did you ever get that impression from me? If I did something wrong please tell me but don't just... don't go away from me."

He attentively took a few steps closer to you. It looked menacing but you knew he was just calculating your next move. He was the prey. But it was you who kept still.

"The bar." The bar?

"What bar?"

"Last week, you brought me to a place. I wore a leather jacket."

Your eyes instantly watered a bit.

"Loki..."

"No. My actions were unnecessary and I shouldn't have- I-."

You broke, fully. You gave in to your heart and hurried to him, still too far across the room. You wrapped your trembling hands around him and almost fell whilst doing so. But he held you mightily, adapting to your action like a lock when it finds its key.

"Lokes... why'd you think that?" You tucked your face in his green and golden armour. "I lo- I know you didn't mean that. You didn't do anything wrong. Please. Is that why you weren't speaking to me anymore?"

Glancing up at him, your gazes met, lost in each other like you could both find your way home. "Yes."

You smiled softly. "Don't do that again. Just talk to me next time."

"There won't be a next time". At that, you frowned. Would he never go out with you again?

"What d'you mean?"

He caressed your cheek, hidden emotions revealed by the trembling of the movement.

"I'll do my best to not do you wrong ever again. It is a promise I'll keep as close to my heart as a dagger."

You giggled dreamily. "Please don't put a knife to your heart."

He moved you closer to his touch. "I won't. But if I do it'll be you who holds the handle."

"You cheeky bastard." And to that, he kissed you ardently, air unneeded for your lungs to work.

N/A: Any idea on what might’ve happened at the club? Also… Loki in a leather jacket.

[delphoxqueen]

Lagoona Blue’s Diary- Wave 2 (2011)

{Scroll to the bottom of the post for the actual diary pages!}

This Diary Belongs to: Lagoona Blue

If you’re going to dive into my diary make sure you know how to swim.

Name: Lagoona Blue

School: Monster High

9/15

I finally got the big wave board that a fiend of mine down under custom made for me. I can’t wait to try it out at Cyclops, Dungeon Beach or maybe Ghost Trees. Of course now that school’s in I can’t just take off whenever I want. Hopefully there’ll be some monster swells over one of our holidays -find crossed till then.

9/25

Conditions for the surf meet were perfect today and I was able to score my first 10 of the season off this killer wave that I totally could feel breathing down the back of my neck. I thought it was going to eat me alive but it only nipped me a bit and then let me escape. Draculaura, Frankie, Clawdeen and Clawd all came out to watch which was totally awesome only…Gil was supposed to be there too but he wasn't. He texted me after it was all over to tell me that Frankie sent him a video of the wave and that I was totally bonzer… I didn’t have the heart to tell him no monster uses that word anymore but he’s so cute when he tries to use slang from down under. He also said he was totally sorry he couldn’t make it but he had some kind of family thing come up and he couldn’t get out of it. I told him no worries but I really was bummed.’ That he wasn’t there to see me ride.

9/28

Today I hung out with Abbey Bominable. She’s new this year and I think she’s been having a hard go of it. Her family lives way up the mountain and so Abbey stays with Headless Headmistress Bloodgood during the week so she doesn’t have to make the up and down trek every day. She can’t even count on calling home every day cause they don’t have cell phones on the mountain, which I can totally relate to since my dad doesn’t have one either. Of course he does live in a place that’s not exactly friendly to electronics. Anyway, I told her that I understood how hard it is to be in a strange place away from your friends and family where no monster speaks your language or really understands your culture. Even at Monster High where there are all kinds of monsters from all kinds of different places it can still take a while to get your sea legs. So when she asked me if I was some kind of fish girl- :) - I did start laughing but I let her know that I wasn’t laughing at her and even though she wanted to walk away I made her come back and we talked for a long time. Abbey is very… direct. She is also very tall and quite strong so I think some monsters get intimidated by her. But you know what? She’s also scary sweet and funny. When I told her that her language skills were fine she said, “No they are… abominable.” I didn’t know if she understood what she had just said but she cracked a little smile and said, “It is joke.” I think Abbey is going to be just fine at MH.

10/7

A rumor cyclone hit school today and nearly turned the whole place into a disaster area, Mom once told me that there are three things every monster should know about a storm:

You can’t stop a storm by being in the middle of it

A storm brings out the best and worst in every monster that goes through one.

Storms take far longer to clean up after than they actually last.

Being raised on the ocean, I’ve seen and been through some monster cyclones but I never figured mum’s rules for a storm would apply to this kind of situation.

10/12

HH Bloodgood wants us to write about our monster heritage for this book to put together and give out to all of us at the end of the year. All right then- this should be easy or possibly not. Problem is my dad is a very private monster and not even the mates on my surf team know him very well and that’s after he had been a volunteer at all our competitions. Until he met me mum he barely had any contact with dry land monsters at all. ‘Course mum’s not exactly a dry land monster either- she’s an ocean nymph. She still lives in the same scary sweet little grotto as she did when dad met and married her. Being a nymph means that mum can leave the water and hang out on land as long as she doesn’t travel too far from her grotto otherwise she gets really weak. Dad will only leave the water for very short periods of time and that’s only if there’s a real emergency- like one time when I was just a small fry I was playing on top of this rock and didn’t notice the tide going out. When I finally did pay attention I found that at low tide it was a long way from the top of that rock where I was to the bottom of that rock that was now sticking out of the sand. Mum couldn’t come and help me cause I was too far from the grotto and I was too little to climb down on my own. I remember the sun being very hot and my skin was starting to not just dry out but to burn. I was really scared and I thought I was never going to get down when I heard my dad calling my name, “Lagoona, it’s okay- be brave and jump to me so we can get you back in the water.” I had to jump down a little but not too far cause dad climbed almost to the top of the rock to get me. It was still a long way from that rock back to the water though and it couldn’t have been easy on my dad to cross that distance twice. He told me later that being on land for him was like swimming against the strongest current in the ocean and never being able to rest. I reckon to have the best of both me and mum and dad though since I’m at home when I’m in the water but I don’t feel like a stranger when I’m on land.

10/16

Mad Science class had to be cancelled today after pier Heath Burns let his impulsive nature get the best of him. A bunch of us walked into class just as Mr. Hackington finished unpacking a large piece of lab equipment. He said it was a gift to the school from a former student who was now a famous mad scientist. It looked like a monster sized shoe box standing on its end and was painted completely black except for one shiny metallic button about half way up one of its sides. Mr. H. was just about to tell us what it was when he got called to the office for some reason. The last thing he said before he left was “All right me little Pandoras- nobody touch the box while I’m gone.” Of course Heath was out of his chair and standing at the box as soon as Mr. Hackington stepped out of the room. Sometimes Deuce will stone Heath before he can get into trouble but this time Deuce just shook his head and said, “He’s got to learn sometime.” Heath just laughed and said, “What?” “Nothing’s going to happen- watch.” Heath pushed the button and there was a noise like a tea kettle makes just before it starts to whistle. Heath jumped back and then the noise stopped. I guess we’d all been holding our breaths… at least those of us who breath… cause we all let them out at once which Heath thought was funny and he walked back over to the box and leaned against its side. “See I told you nothing was going to hap…” was all he got out as a panel in the box opened up and two tentacles shot out and pulled Heath in. The panel immediately closed and we could hear Heath yelling for help and lots of banging and what sounded like splashing. Mr. Hackington came back at that moment and he must have figured out what happened pretty quick cause he ran to his desk, grabbed something that looked like a remote control and pointed it at the box. All of a sudden a panel at the bottom of the box opened and Heath shaped package wrapped in what looked like a spider silk dipped in tar shot out and bounced across the floor. Mr. Hackington made us all leave before we could find out if Heath was okay but later on in the day Headless Headmistress Bloodgood told us he was going to be fine only he was going to need a few days off from school. Poor bloke.

10/24

Gil and I got into a fight today. = ( I’m not even sure how it started although he did seek to be a bit preoccupied and crabby today. Anyway, one minute we were swimming laps in the MH pool and the next we were shouting at each other. All I said was we should mix up our training with some laps in the ocean. The next thing I know he’s accusing me of being snob who doesn’t like fresh water. I was totally gob smacked. I shouted, “Gillington Webber!” “Why would you say such a thing?” I don’t think I’ve ever used his full name before and it seemed to snap him out of whatever funk he was in. He apologized and left the pool but later on in the day he put a scary sweet card in my locker. I wish he would tell me what’s going on but he totally clams up if I push him so I guess I’ll find out sooner or later… I’m hoping sooner.

About Me

Name: Lagoona Blue

Age: 15

Monster Parent: The Sea Monster

Killer Style: I mostly like to creep out in my baggies, tank top and floppies. That way I’m ready for any kind of a scary good time whether it’s surfing, screech volleyball or checking out the monster bro’s with my girls. But I also like to show up to parties in my scary cute little black dress just to show everybody I can pull off the look.

Freaky Flaw: My skin tends to dry out if I spend too much time out of the water so I go through a fright of monstuerizer. Chlorine from the Monster High pool also has a tendency to turn my blind hair blue but it’s a creeperific look don’t you think?

Pet: Neptuna is my pet piranha and I’ve got a special purse that’s actually a fishbowl so I can secretly take Neptuna to class.

Favorite Activity: Anything that involves being in, on or around the water.

Biggest Pet Peeve: Anyone who treats the ocean like his or her own personal trashcan.

Favorite School Subject: Ocean-ography. If I can’t be in the water I want to be studying about it.

Least Favorite School Subject: Geology. Volcanoes + rocks + desert= my nightmares.

Favorite Color: Ocean blue.

Favorite Food: Sushi.

BFF’s: I’m down with everybody brah.

[danteinthedevildom]

So, talkin abt multilingual Mams, 

I was gonna make this post anyway but then I saw @cheerypining​​ put this in the tags of my post re: Mams’ English in his character song:

I would like to hollar out a hell yes! 

The thing with Mams is that he isn’t stupid. He’s smart as fuck, he’s just motivated by self interest and fixation. It’s easier for him to learn things that are of interest to him, or that expand his interests. He’s got that sweet, sweet ADD brain.

So, if language helps him spread out his influence, make money, expand his contacts? It’s gonna be that lil bit easier for him to figure out. It might even be a fixation of his. Learn a language; open opportunities in the place that language hails from. Gain an interest in how language works. Learn other languages bc it’s fun. 

Consider, then, if you will, for some of that tastey lore-building, 

Mams starting out learning the languages of the most influencial/opulent human powers. It’s beneficial for him to figure out how to speak their language if he really wants to get at their pockets, and you can’t really smooth talk someone if you barely understand the way their haggling works. How is anyone going to trust you if their idioms go over your head, or if you miss some slang that marks you very starkly as an outsider? It’s a lot easier if they think you’re like them; if you know the little things that’ll get them lowering their guard around you. 

He’s great with dialects, too. With differences between the upper and lower classes. It only takes one slip-up using court language around the common folk, or using the dialet of the north in the south, for him to recognise how important those divisions are. He works with trust, and the eventual corruption of that trust, and it becomes pretty clear to him pretty quick that trust can only be attained the more like his target he sounds. 

Dead languages still live on in Mammon’s brain. He’s fluent in them, and even though he hasn’t really had to use them in some time, for some reason they’ve just never faded away. You can pretty much use him as a way to track how languages changed over time, how regional variants were influenced by other languages or cultures, when various languages died out and what replaced them. 

It’s not something that he really thinks about. It was beneficial for him, so he learnt it. Beyond that, it was fun, and he enjoyed it. He doesn’t really give himself credit for just how much linguistic history he has stored inside his head, and he really doesn’t put much credit into how goddamn useful it is - or would be - for modern historians. That’s not what he’s interested in. He’s content to leave Satan to the books, to the past; he’s got more of a propensity for the practicality, anyway. 

Listening to him talk is actually pretty astounding. The ease with which he slips into each language, the depth of his understanding for even the slight nuances between regions, makes him seem like a native speaker. The speed, too, is absolutely stunning; you’ve never seen a more baffling sight than Mammon, speaking mild-mannered in Russian to a witch, switching mid-sentence into heavily-flirtatious French to order from the waitress that came to their table. It’s like he doesn’t even stumble between the two, both as natural to him as breathing. 

He has his preferences, of course. When he’s not using the language for his own goals - doesn’t need to, for instance, be careful about his word choice to ensure a bond of trust is made - he quickly slips into a dialect that is most comfortable for him. He might use ‘watashi’ or ‘ore’ when he’s on the job, might tack on the ‘gozaimasu’ to his greetings to make them polite, but when he’s just generally speaking Japanese? That’s when he starts using ‘ore-sama’, when he drops all the humble or stilted phrases; uses ‘ja ne’ instead of ‘sayounara'. That’s when, in English, he stops making sure to enunciate fully; starts shortening ‘you’ to ‘ya’, cuts off the ‘g’ from ‘ing’ words, starts peppering in ‘crap’ instead of ‘stuff’, lets his words slur together to make ‘whaddaya’ out of ‘what are you’. 

He’s naturally an informal guy! It’s just the way he prefers to talk. He hates the pompous lingo, even if it’s usually the most beneficial to learn for what he does. If the language he’s speaking has a way to show belligerent informality, he will absolutely use it whenever he can. It’s a choice, make no mistake; he can arguably speak better in most languages than the stupid high academics. He just doesn’t enjoy that crap when it’s not immediately useful to him. 

(Yes, that does mean he can comprehend even the most pompously written academic papers. No, that doesn’t mean he wants to read them. He would much sooner stab a fork into his giblets than sit down for any period of time and read that wordy bullshit. Same goes for a lot of Satan’s literature; it’s just not enjoyable for him to read, even if he can perfectly understand it.)

Sometimes a word works better in one language than another. It can get extremely frustrating for him, if he has a very specific point to get across; unless someone knows both languages, they’re never going to fully understand. And why use five words in the inefficient language when one in the efficient language would have been even better for his intent? ‘Fernweh’ works much better than ‘imagine being homesick for a place you’ve never been’, after all.  

Mams has a tendency to drop in words he likes from other languages, which makes some of his speech sound a little confusing. He doesn’t think it makes him sound smarter, and he’s not doing it to show off; just, sometimes, he thinks ‘hey’ sounds better than ‘ohayou’, or that ‘ciao’ is cooler and more aloof than ‘au revoir’. Plus, it’s kinda funny when you’re talking to someone Lucifer and you insult them in a language they don’t understand. 

(I mean, in English, we literally say stuff like “it has a little je ne sais quoi,” [it has a little something that I can’t adequately express] so we merge languages into our own in order to better express ourselves. Mams does the same. He just does it with words and phrases that aren’t always naturally used together within that language.)

Do you understand the amount of skill that comes with being able to do this without even stopping to think? He somehow manages to do it in a way that makes each sentence still perfectly fluent and understandable in translation. It’s a little incredible, actually, considering he doesn’t put any stock into this ability. It’s just natural for him. Why’s he gotta think on it more than that? 

(This does mean, the few times someone points it out, that he gets incredibly flustered. Especially if they say it in awe, or in praise. It really is just second nature to him, not even something he’s putting on for show or something that he’s trying to be good at, so being given so much positive attention for it is... well. It’s surprising, and a little nice, actually. But also genuinely embarrasing. It’s perhaps the only time he’ll struggle to find words in any language.)

In conclusion:

Hell yeah I love reinforcin the idea that Mams ain’t stupid and that there’s a lot of goddamn skill that comes with learnin languages and learnin them to such a degree you can accurately pepper their words into your speech without stoppin to think. 

[idiotic-genius]

How to write a foreign character in a new country

Requested by @ii-maysqq

So when you write a story, some of your characters might travel the world and see new places. That can be really scary and confusing at times! Here’s a small guide on how to write that realistically.

1. What does the character already know about the country?

Depending on how spontaneously they decided to get there, they might know very little about the culture and rules of the country. For example, what if you came to Greece without knowing that nodding your head up meant “no” instead of “yes” (which would be nodding your head down)? So that’s something you should think about first. Did the character do research before their travel? Did they just google it on the plane or did they spend at least a month planning? This could greatly affect how confident the character is in themselves when they arrive. That planning also has to do with the character’s personality, whether or not their quickly anxious and how spontaneous and confident they are in general.

2. How different is the new country from their own country?

There’s a big difference between going from the Netherlands to Germany and going from Russia to Japan. Your character might experience something called a “culture shock”, which means that they start feeling absolutely out of place because they don’t feel incorporated in the new culture they’ve got thrown into. For this, you should try to research the different cultures of the character’s original country and the one they are visiting. Sometimes, there’s also the possibility that the different countries are quite similar. That can be used for funny situations where the character thinks everything’s fine and familiar and then something happens that throws them of. What about for example England and America? They aren’t so different in many ways, but one big thing that pops into mind is that in England you drive on the left side of the road, and in America they drive on the right. Imagine stepping out of the airport, thinking to yourself “Yass welcome to America!” and then almost getting run over by a car because you looked the wrong side of the road- That can be quite shocking. But the character might also find comfort in the small things that remind them of their original country. You could also try to find out how the currencies are in the two countries- will the character have to adapt to a new system? Do they have to go to the bank to exchange currencies? Will they need time to get used to paying “2 dollars” instead of “17,85 Dirham”, or is the currency the same after all? That’s an important thing to take into consideration.

3. Languages

Of course, language is a very important part of traveling and living in a new country. In most countries, people can speak English and that’s really practical, but on longterm, not knowing the language of a country you want to live in evolves into a grave problem. And even if your character already knows the language, modern slang could be a real struggle. Textbook-Vocabulary might be enough for work and studying, but in daily life, not knowing what certain words mean can get so very annoying. Another thing to consider when including struggles with language could be accents and dialects. As an example, people from the north of Germany and people from the South can barely understand each other because of their different dialects, so even if someone knows German, they might have to learn even more just to live in a certain area of the country. Also, obviously British English and American English are not the same at all. On one side, there’s the accent, on the other, some words are completely different. In school, we used to do exercises that were like vocabulary tests where you had to “translate” words from British to American English, which included “cab” and “taxi”, “holiday” and “vacation” and so on and so forth. The point is, even if your character already speaks the “right” language, locals will probably notice rather quickly that they are not from around, whether it would be from their accent, because they don’t know the slang or because they use different words for the same thing.

4. People and structures

This point is a little abstract, but I wanted to include it anyways. Depending on how far away the character is traveling, they will probably encounter people that behave very differently than what they are used to. Here, you should look out that you don’t overdo stereotypes. However, you can say with quite some certainty that America is much more diverse than Germany, and that in France, the people are more warm and matey than in England. But don’t go into the extremes and make every American a bald-eagle-breeder that quotes the Declaration of Independence at every possible occasion and every German a beer-loving N*zi, that’s just unrealistic. With “structures”, I mean that you could look into the classical architectural styles of the country that the character came from and the one they’re in now. Sometimes, those can be very different, so it can be a cool detail to include in your story.

5. Reactions

As mentioned, when you’re new to a country, people WILL notice. The question is, how do they react? This also has to do with where exactly your character is living, not only country-wise, but also whether they’re in a big city, a suburban neighborhood or the countryside. Furthermore, of course you’ll have to find fitting reactions for your character. Are they intimidated by the big buildings of the city because they’ve only known small two-level-builds so far? Are they excited to get to know new people and learn a new language, or are they scared? You should consider that and more to make that part of your story as realistic as possible.

6. Example

As originally requested, here’s some inspiration for writing a british character coming to America for work/study.

They’ll probably be very much confused by what side of the road the cars drive on, and, depending on whether they have a car, will have to concentrate a great deal the first few times they drive themselves. They will have to adapt to the American English and try to stop saying “chips” instead of “fries” when ordering, and it their accent could make them insecure at times, especially if they’re surrounded by locals. Furthermore, they would have to participate in Thanksgiving and the Independence Day because all of their new acquaintances will. Halloween may not be a much bigger deal in America than it is in England (because it’s a really important thing there), but the Christmas traditions can differ greatly. The character would have to deal with the fact that they pay in dollars now instead of pounds, and would have to arrange themselves with the knowledge that one of their favorite snacks doesn’t exist in America.

[soraka-in-warhammer40k]

Celestials, Soraka, and Technology

From a celestial perspective, technology is weird. Just like how for higher beings there is no difference between "thought" and "speech" (and their very nature for that matter), there is no differenciation between doing an action and using another thing to do said action.

If a tool is, technically speaking, the extension of one's body, from a celestial perspective the tool no longer exists. It is now part of the body. At the same time most of such entities are not used to dealing with things that would require tools. If a being is so powerful that one careless thought alone could blow out a sun, it barely stops to consider what might be the best way to put a piece of metal into a wall to then hang another thing on it.

At the same time the nature of celestial beings is static. From a mortal perspective it is absolute chaos and evershifting madness, but from the other perspective it is an unchanging state at the very top of the universal power level. Being this powerful and at the same time being entirely used to a static world where one is destined to stand at the top causes a somewhat understable arrogance mostly displayed in such beings not understanding the true power of the very concept of progress and technology itself. Just because they could not change the core rules behind the universe, they assume no one else, especially not beings less powerful than them. This assumption is... questionable to say the least.

Soraka however is very different from her kin beyond the confines of reality in that she is very interested in how the mortal races do things. She is the "mortals weeaboo" in her crowd, who thinks that since her existence as a celestial entity is static and therefore finite at some very distant point (and also very boring), even if there is a 0,001% chance mortals might get it done and change the very rules of existence to prevent the right now inevitable death of all things, ideas, and timelines due to multiversal entropy, it is worth giving a shot - hence why she gave up almost all of her powers to form a material body to live as one, all while essentially burning the bridge as she crossed it. Despite still having a connection to her origins she can never ever return - not that she'd even want to.

Dealing with technology is just plain fun for her. It's like a puzzle with a billion pieces that occasionally might explode you if you are not careful. However, her perspective on things is still very celestial, which often shows with her barely making a distinction between organic, psychic, or metal parts of whatever is in front of her. It is easy to overlook details when you look at things from a whole galaxy away.

The fact that her tinkering-hobby has not cost Soraka her life or at least several limbs, especially with the volatile technology of the 40k universe, is based on two "cheat-skills" of hers: future vision and omnilingual communications. While the general state of the warp is such a mess that proper forecasts and prophecies barely work, doing a regular check if one's own fateline ends if one were to cut the red or the green wire is a fairly easy task for her. "If I were to take this ship into orbit towards this station in this state, would my line end on the way?" If the answer is yes, the project still need further iterations. However, this absurdly long game of trial and error would have never gotten to a conclusion if not for her other ability.

This second skill, the omnilingual communication, is her ability to ask for help and advice from rather unusual sources. For a Celestial language is probably as weird as technology. It is such a foreign concept that if you actually took the time to master it, it does not really matter what sort of language you speak, as you mastered the very concept of languages. The rest is just getting used to slang and local dialects, at least from a higher being's point of view.

This includes the primitive language of mechanical beings as well, but obviously only those with some form of intelligence, even if it is a rather primitive version of it. And, yes, that includes the countless variations of T'au Drones.

When she was in that scrapyard putting the -> "Stardust" together, she did not do that alone. She had countless other (semi-)intelligent beings helping her simply because she could ask for their knowledge, either things inside their databases, whatever their sensor data could capture, or information to where else the information in question might be found. In fact, most of the Drones on her ship are from that time, and their own AI has changed from such interactions as well. For further detail on this view the post -> "Soraka and her Drones"

[forbidding-souda]

Deaf S/O with characters I headcanon knowing ASL

ASL specifically, though ASL and sign language go interchangeably with this headcanon, this post specifies things to ASL.

And this S/O is deaf AND signs ASL, doesn’t specify anything else otherwise I’d be specific about it :)

(gender neutral S/O ofc ofc)

-Mod Souda

Rantaro Amami

Something he noticed about you quickly is how loud you were.

You two moved in together, and it was never something he would have predicted.

You’ll go to get food at midnight and slam the cupboard close, scaring him awake.

You always eat at midnight too, it’s unusual to him.

He will wake up with you absent in the bed and be like oh no.

He’s a very calm, quiet person.

He will never tell you about your volume, though, in fear he’ll embarrass you.

When you first met, after learning you were deaf, he definitely watched a lot of videos on deaf culture.

He also developed a crush on Nyle DiMarco.

I mean what.

If you ask he doesn’t know who that is.

He’s very educated on the manor, and often corrects people when they refer to you incorrectly.

But the way he signs is very textbook-y.

He signs 16 like ten-six, which bothers you.

Does NOT keep up with sign language slang.

You signed see you later to him and it blew his mind.

You tried to show him the sign for emoji and he went ???

The sign name you give him is ‘beautiful’, and then it ends with an R.

Kirumi Toujou

You often have to ask her to repeat herself to get the message of her words across, since she hardly uses facial expressions.

She learned ASL for a job once and forget a lot of it.

You enjoy teaching her, definitely.

Because teaching her means she’ll sign like you.

One time she signed Sunday a different way than you and you went ???

“Where did you learn that.”

“... signing saavy.”

“Nice.”

The best part about her is that she is actually good at the grammar structure.

It’s actually quite surprising that you don’t have to simplify your sentences.

Going shopping is fun with her, too.

That’s where she specializes; in food.

She can name almost everything in the food aisle.

Can easily understand your excited rambling but can’t seem to sign fast herself.

Slow and delicate, it’s cute.

Worst part for her is how loud you have the TV.

She likes doing laundry in silence, but that’s hard when she can hear the conversations of characters all the way from the living room.

She asks you to turn it down.

“Sorry.”

You don’t.

She is always working hard as the SHSL Maid, so you hardly get to see her.

But whenever she returns she always brings you a small gift.

Sometimes foreign coins or keychains.

Her sign name is ‘business’ with a T, because you met her while she was working and she was very focused!

Peko Pekoyama

Hid the fact that she knew ASL from you.

It was because she’s bad at it.

You assure her that to the Deaf community, it’s the effort that matters.

She has met a lot of deaf people because of you and gets scared to sign to them.

She even blushes in embarrassment.

But if you ask for help in public than she’ll be happy to assist.

That’s rare, though, since you almost always find a way to communicate with hearing people who don’t sign.

Something she enjoys is the stillness of your house.

The Kuzuryuu household always has some type of noise going on.

Yours is almost always quiet.

She isn’t afraid to sign to you when you’re home alone.

You like teaching her signs like “wow.”

Seeing her sign them in a neutral face is funny to you.

“Facial expressions matter to my language, Peko!”

She gets flustered when you correct her.

Her sign name is a motion that signifies her braids, with a P handshape.

You always love playing with her hair.

She thinks it’s annoying.

“I want another name sign.”

“No.”

She’ll crawl into bed next to you and then feel you messing with her hair.

She huffs, “I thought you were sleeping.”

“I know.”

Sonia Nevermind

Different types of sign language was always her favorite thing to learn.

She loves Deaf culture and always tries to involve herself in it.

Meeting you made her even more excited once she learned you were deaf.

You thought it was really weird until she explained that she studied the culture.

You were impressed, especially since she had never talked to one in person before.

She even started signing slang and it blew your mind.

You gave her a sign name the first day you met her, and she almost passed out in joy.

Princess with an S, and she thought it was awesome, even though it was basic.

She told all of her classmates she got a sign name.

When a bunch of Ultimates came up to you asking for a sign name you went ???

Well now you have to bring her to a Deaf convention.

When she attends ballroom dances, she always brings you along so you can meet people of her culture as well.

She keeps you by her side, holding your hand the entire time and explaining what is happening and why.

She secretly wants to be an interpreter.

Dating her is really fun, of course, because she really wants to learn.

Makes a law that says interpreters are a necessity in her countries broadcasts.

Whenever she travels, she always sends you selfies with the ILY sign.

It’s her favorite.

She never stops thinking about you.

She works hard to make laws to the Deaf community in her country feels welcome.

Gundham Tanaka

Originally learned sign language to teach to his pets.

Never knew he would have to use it to talk to someone.

Until Sonia introduced you to him and he busted out in ASL

Sonia and you going ?? OH UH HI YEs

Signs as dramatic as you think he would.

Sign name is literally devil.

Asked specifically for that sign name.

When you both cuddle he’ll smother his face against you - often your chest or your neck - and mutter how much he loves you.

If you still have some of your hearing you’ll be like “I swear to god if you don’t stop using your voice.”

If you’re stone deaf you’ll just roll your eyes and enjoy the vibrations against your skin.

Gundham would also definitely hum against you.

His voice is deep and it rumbles so yes.

You can also talk to a lot of his animals, since they understand sign language.

It’s awesome being able to communicate with animals.

You like taking baths with him, too.

He likes talking a lot so it would be easier to talk to him.

If he ever needs help with the big cats, he’ll call you, because their scary roars don’t bother you.

The fact that they have claws does though.

Whenever he gets anxious he talks behind his scarf, which drives you crazy.

“Sign, damnit, or I will literally kill you!”

Mikan Tsumiki

Has helped a lot of deaf students.

But barely knows any words outside of the medical field.

Gets emberassed whenever you correct her on something she signs wrong.

Signs mostly PSE, but you help her switch into ASL.

She’s a big hugger, always holding you close and having you cradle her.

You gave her the sign name “shaky princess.”

“P-Princes???”

She takes awhile to get used to how blunt ASL is.

Stutters a lot still, even in ASL.

Whenever you sign to her while she has something in her hand she’ll start freaking out and crying about not being able to respond.

Until one day you sign to her with one hand and she’s like ??? you can do that?

Showers with you a lot.

Her brain doesn’t process signing in the shower, though.

So it’s mostly just the two of you standing together.

She definitely prefers sign language over talking.

Sometimes she finds herself signing while talking, too.

Shinguuji Korekiyo

100% you cannot convince me this man doesn’t know ASL.

He is obsessed with culture, so he’s definitely very knowledgable in Deaf culture and history as well.

Though understanding his signs is very hard because of his mask.

Sometimes he’ll take off his hat so you can easily see the upper half of his face.

(Okay but can we talk about if deaf S/O is a girl how he wouldn’t kill her because Miyadera doesn’t know sign language so they wouldn’t be friends)

An amazing signer, though, since he talks to a lot of Deaf people.

I mean you almost can’t tell he’s hearing.

It’s just the facial expressions and body movement.

Boy is stiff.

Makes you uncomfortable when he signs things like chubby face and skinny.

He just... stands there with his blank eyes.

He scares you all the time, too.

Like he’ll just walk up behind you and touch you.

Not even a shoulder nudge either he’ll just grab you and hug you.

You let out a noise of surprise each time.

If you’re nonverbal, that’s probably why he does it.

You really wanted his sign name to be something like mystery man.

Discussed it with your deaf friends.

Settled on anthropology just because of the hat he wears.

Really wanted it to be less obvious though.

You like to have tea with him.

Because everytime he changes into his eating mask, you are like-

“Why don’t you have a signing mask?”

“The point of the mask is to hide my mouth.”

Kiibo

Doesn’t remember learning ASL

Just??? Knew it.

When he saw you signing to your friend he knew what you were saying without realizing.

Hands move in language hello???

You had to explain to him that you are deaf and it’s how you communicate.

He thinks it’s incredible how you have your own language.

He’s also grateful that he knows it so he could learn more about what being Deaf is.

If you’re verbal than one day you’ll speak while signing and he’ll ???

YOU CAN TALK????

“Yes Kiibo I can talk.”

You show him stereotypical Deaf movies.

He’s happy you’re deaf because that means he can sing around you.

You clap every time he does.

Likes watching anime with you because the CC comes naturally.

Even though he obvi knows Japanese.

Definitely owns clothes from Deaf conventions.

Isn’t scared to sign to people at all, by the way.

And doesn’t mind living in a household with a deaf person, the slamming of cabinets and doors doesn’t bother him.

Very happy to be apart of Deaf culture.

He’s very prideful in being a robot so of course that’s his sign name.

Kaito Momota

Chaotic.

Knows ASL because he took classes one time.

When he learns you’re deaf he will force you to watch every movie he watched in his ASL class.

Will try to sneak up on you.

But he stomps when he walks so it doesn’t always work.

Though, just to bother you, when he walks by he’ll pull your hair.

Replaced shoulder nudges with pulling your hair.

When you sign a word he doesn’t know he’ll pretend to understand.

You can tell when he doesn’t.

He is very prideful in his signing abilities.

He’s just happy to be able to communicate you.

Shhh don’t tell S/O but he loves them very much and tries his best.

He literally started taking ASL classes again just to catch up on new signs.

Didn’t tell you, of course.

Begs you to make his sign name astronaut.

You thought about it.

Egotistical with K’s :)

He’s like akdkskfkekffk NO

He’s says something like “Oh yeah well your sign name is UGLY!!”

“Stay mad stay mad.”

He tries to white knight situations in like restaurants.

“You’re not my interpreter.”

“Yeah but they don’t know ASL.”

“Neither does the rest of the world but I’ve made it so far.”

He literally like gets nervous about you going places alone.

What if they can’t communicate???

“Kaito.”

“What.”

“Shut up.”

He always brags to you because he’s quadlingual though.

You learn curse words in Russian to sticky note to the bathroom mirror.

His signing is cute though.

For someone like Kaito.

[weirdthinkingdragon]

Unwanted Devotion

Yandere Erasermic x Reader

Warnings of yandere and obsessive themes, and kidnapping (like usual)

I was resting in the cat cafe with my best friend, Adara. She loves cats almost as much as me, and they seem rather fond of us too. I scratched the chin of a long-haired Bombay. Its fur was extremely soft and silky to the touch. They take really good care of the cats here. I should know from working here before. Adara laughed as the tail of a white Persian swiped across her nose. It was a peaceful silence between us otherwise.

“So, anyway, have you got anyone to date yet?” She asked, suddenly speaking up. Why did this have to come up? “Eh, only once, but it didn’t last long since he liked someone better.” 

“Ouch. Well, definitely plenty of fish in the sea, huh?” I sighed. “Yeah, but that isn’t really the main focus right now. I can focus on that after my job starts to pay me more. Barely scraping by, but they’re giving me a raise hopefully next week.” 

“That’s not a wrong thing to do.” I rolled my eyes at her. “Says the one married to a rich man already.” 

“Once again, true.” The bell opened to two men entering. They seem slightly familiar. Adara seemed to recognize them before I did. “No way! Is that Hizashi and Shouta!?” I knew she was about to yell out to them. I tried to stop her by covering her mouth, but she leaned away right before. “Hey, Hizashi! Shouta! Is it really you two!?” Her yelling caused the two of them to turn their heads into our direction. A face of annoyance came over the one with the long black hair. It perked up a bit when he and I locked eyes. 

It didn’t take long for the two of them to come to our table, especially seeing the two cats with us. The Bombay of which decided to rest in front of me on the table. That seemed to grab Shouta’s attention. It just looked at him while purring contentedly.  He seemed rather surprised. It could be this one doesn’t like many people. Adara sat next to me for the other seat to be empty for the two of them. 

“It’s been AGES guys! We really should have kept better touch! How have the two of ya been!?” As hyper as ever Hizashi exclaimed. It startled the Bombay, making their fur puff up, but they still didn’t move. 

Adara nodded. “Yeah, it’s been way too long. Surprised to see you guys here. The two of you have been rather busy, huh? being heroes AND teachers now.” 

Wait… what? “Wait… they’re teachers now?” She nodded. “Yep. They actually have been for a few years already!” My eyes widened in surprise. “Hah, wow, never expected you to become a teacher Shouta!” He kept his ever so stoic expression. I do however have a growing interest in how he got that scar on his face. Something tells me it might be a touchy subject though, so no bringing it up.  

A cream-colored Persian went into Shouta’s lap, instantly getting his black outfit full of bright long specks. He didn’t seem to care in the slightest, and it made Hizashi chuckle at him. Hizashi grabbed Shouta’s free hand closest to him and interlocked their fingers. An odd sense of sadness came over me, but there was also happiness as well. Shouta seemed to be looking around making sure no one else saw. It wasn’t very busy considering it was night and had less than half an hour before closing. 

It reminds me that I used to like both a while ago. Of course, now that's definitely off the table. It’s great they stuck towards their heroic desires though. I had to give up from not being able to intern. Same with Adara. Shouta saw where my sight was aimed and tried to pull his hand from Hizashi. “No worries! We can keep it a secret!” Adara piped up.

I smirked at her and looked at them. “What secret?.” She smirks back and that seems to ease Shouta. “Ya should have told me you quit working here! I was tryin’ to find ya months ago! I asked your co-workers when you worked so I could drop by. They refused to tell me!” 

“Well, think about it. They probably thought you might have been a stalker or something. You’re not as recognizable without your hair up.” He thought for a moment and nodded. “Ya got me there!” 

“Still, really bummed they didn’t even tell me someone was asking for me. We could have met so much sooner!” 

“You’re tellin’ me! Well, don’t stop now! Give me your number!”

I laughed at his enthusiasm and gladly gave it to him. He almost too eagerly put my number into his phone. “Might as well give me your number as well.” Shouta piped up. I was rather surprised he wanted it. He didn’t talk to me much back in school. He did often sit by me though. Rather closely too, but there was nothing about it. I shrugged it off and also gave it to him. Adara did the same, but they didn’t seem as enthusiastic about it? Well, she can be rather annoying in her texts. The Bombay demanded attention again by rubbing their head against my hand. 

“Anyways, I envy the energy you have Hizashi. You never seem to run out.” I commented. 

“I really wish he would. He can never be quiet.”  

“Aw Sho, don’t be like that! Ya know you dig it!” 

“I really don’t.” Hizashi looped his arm around Shouta’s shoulders. “Baaaabe! Don’t be so meeeeaaan!” 

“Quiet down!” He snapped, quickly looking around again. None of the staff were in earshot distance and they were busy starting to sweep and restock things. 

“I’d like to ask something if that’s okay,” I said. Shouta looked at me and nodded while Hizashi and Adara were spouting something about music and new slang. He nodded. “How long have the two of you been together? You don’t have to answer if it’s too personal though.” 

He seems to think for a moment. “Believe it or not, it wasn’t long after school. We met up again and spoke to each other at times like now when we have the time,” He looked over and “glared” at Hizashi. “If only he could be a bit quieter, but that’s never going to change with his loud mouth.”

“Were ya talkin’ ‘bout me, babe?” Hizashi suddenly asks, gaining attention towards us. I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Maybe, maybe not,” A smirk grew on my face. “He’s just saying how much he loves you.” Shouta glares harshly at me with a bit of blush forming on his face as Hizashi quickly pulls him closer. “Aw! How sweet of ya!” Adara laughs at Shouta’s misery. 

Hizashi looked at me. “So, y/n, have ya got a lover yet?” I groaned. “Adara JUST asked me that before you two came!”

“We weren’t here then.” I sighed heavily. “No, and I’m not planning on it until my life is more together.” The two of them grew worried expressions. “What do you mean?” 

I gave a nonchalant shrug. “Just having trouble with a bad landlord and bills. You know, the usual sucky things of life.” Hizashi looked at me with a small frown. “We could-” I knew what he was about to say, and that’s a definite no.  “No. I can’t have you guys do that for me.” I cut in. “But we’re will-” 

“Nope! I’ll handle it on my own.” 

“Y/n, this is serious. Let us help you before it gets worse. I’d know.” Shouta’s voice turned incredibly stern. It almost made me want to cave in and accept it. No wonder he’s a teacher now. 

“Listen, I understand your guy’s concern for me, but I’ll be fine! You both have my number, so maybe just text me something later, and I’ll reach out if I need to.” I persisted. Shouta’s eyes narrowed more. I’ve forgotten how truly powerful this man’s glare was. Yikes. 

It felt like hours, though it was only seconds until he finally relented with a nod of his head and the other two let out their breath they were holding. 

Adara decided to break the tension in the worst way possible. “Hey, Y/n? Remember when you used to have a crush on-” I covered her mouth before she could finish. “That jerk from school? Yeah, I want to slap my younger self for ever having that damn thing on such a narcissist.” I quickly came up with that lie and glared harshly at her. I could tell Shouta can tell something was a lie. 

Adara licked my hand. It took a lot of restraint not to recoil and take my hand away from her mouth. “We better go. Text me later for us to meet up!” I told them, and dragged Adara out the door. I yanked on her long red hair to make her come, and as a little payback. As soon as we got out the door and a little ways away, I let go of her. “What was that about!? You were going to make it so awkward between us four than it already was!”

“Don’t try to deny it! You STILL have feelings for the both of them! I can tell just by the way you look at them!” 

“They’re together now! Do you know how bad it would be!? Seriously, they’d never want to talk to me again!” She shrugged. “I don’t know about that. They seemed still pretty interested in you.” 

“You’re reading too far into things. I don’t want this to come up again.��� I hissed, and stormed away with feeling sheer embarrassment at the utter gall she had to try bringing that up. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I started to hang out with the two of them in their limited free time. It surprised me they wanted me to hang out with the two of them every time they were free. My little thing I still had for them quickly vanished as I saw their interactions. Now it’s me trying not to physically gush how adorable they are together. Shouta was reading with his legs over Hizashi’s. A cute little habit I noticed of his is him always having to touch Shouta in some sort of way. In public? A “friendly” arm slung around his shoulders. Between us? Holding his hand or even just rubbing his hands on Shouta’s legs. Especially if Shouta is wearing shorts, like he is now. 

I didn't want to impede on their connection more and more as my mind focused on it. They don’t need me here. They were sitting on their couch while myself was on the loveseat. My phone was out in front of me while I absentmindedly glanced at the two of them from time to time. The more the thought wandered, isn’t this kinda weird as well? We don’t even really speak at times like this. Sure, the peace is great and all, but… Fuck it, this has to change. Come on Adara. Right now would be a great time to- 

My phone started to ring. It was Adara. Impeccable timing! I answered it and stood up to leave the room. “What’s up gir-’

“You need to get away from them NOW!!!” Adara sounded beyond panicked. Panic quickly started to rise in me as well as I glanced at the two men. They didn’t seem any different. I stopped looking before Hizashi and I could lock eyes. 

“What do you mean?” I question. 

“I fully underestimated just HOW much they love you! My husband was just warned by his friend you’re in danger. You need to leave, and NEVER be alone with them again! No matter how much they ask! Get out now, before you can’t again!” 

Okay, that’s beyond concerning. But they’d be caught if they ever did something like that! This can’t be a joke though. She’s surprisingly not one for jokes. 

“You’re on a suspect list! It’s free reign if they get you! RUN!” 

The fear increased tenfold with her words. I look back at the cou- They’re not there! Flight kicked in, and I started to run towards the front door. My wrist was suddenly grabbed, and my phone is yanked from my hand. My attention snapped forward to Shouta tightly gripping my phone. Tight enough his knuckles turned white as he pressed the speaker button. 

Hizashi was standing next to Shouta with a betrayed and hurt expression. His frown deeper than I’ve ever seen it. Shouta isn’t doing much better. “You know Adara, It’s rather hurtful to go back on trying to rekindle our love.” Chills ran up my spine. That doesn’t even sound like Hizashi. 

A shriek of surprise came over the phone. It quickly turned to her breathing heavily. She sounded more angry than fearful. “It’s because you two are fucking insane you put them on the suspect list!!” she spat. 

“That’s rather hurtful, dear Adara.” Hizashi fully blew off her accusation. 

Shouta squeezed it tight enough the screen started to crack. He wasn’t holding my wrist… I decided to run for it. I didn’t even get close to the door when something wrapped tightly around my waist and dragged me back. It was pulled up slightly to prevent me from falling. There was only one thing it could be… Shouta’s capture weapon. He was using his quirk and it only needed one hand. The other still held the phone. 

“You’re no longer needed. Stay quiet, and maybe things won’t end bad for you.” 

‘Crack’ the phone got crushed. 

I was in full blown panic now. Especially the look on their faces. It didn’t take long for Hizashi to hug me tightly. Something wet dripped onto my shoulder. Why is he crying!? If anything, I should be the one crying! “Sho, w-we did it all wrong!” Shouta sighs angrily. He stopped using his quirk, but his capture weapon still was wrapped tightly around me. Including my arms which were pinned to my sides. 

“We overheard that night. We were hoping to bring your love back to us by jealousy,” His eyes narrowed as he looked away. “Turns out that was clearly the wrong decision. It only drove you away more.” 

Hizashi hugged tighter. “Do-Don’t worry Songbird! We can still fix this! We can make ya love us again!” He turned his head towards Shouta. Shouta walked behind me and hugged my bound form as well. It was so binding to the point it was hard to breathe. I tried to squirm in their toxic grip. The attempt to break free was clearly fruitless, only succeeding in them squeezing tighter like a snake suffocating its prey. 

Shouta leaned to be right next to my ear, and let out a satisfied exhale. It being so close to my ear sent another shiver up my spine. “We should have done this much sooner.” Hizashi eagerly nodded as I started to get tired and stopped struggling. 

“Ya see! They’re already lovin’ us! Sho, it’s not close enough though!” In the corner of my eye, Shouta nodded in agreement. They released me, but like a leash Shouta pulls me over to the large couch, Hizashi not far behind. 

"Hold them." Shouta said, and pushed me closer to Hizashi. He didn't have to be told twice. Shouta quickly used his quirk to undo his capture weapon. They had a silent conversation as I started to squirm again. “Guys, stop this! I moved on, you guys need to as well!” 

Their faces turned to delusional obsession. Hizashi sat on the couch, and forced my legs to wrap around his lower back. Shouta quickly ties his capture weapon around my ankles before Hizashi lets go of my legs. 

Hizashi then leans against the armrest of the couch as Shouta goes behind me. He puts his legs over Hizashi’s, and leans forward to fully sandwich me. 

“No. We’ll make you love us again. We lost ya once, and never again.” 

“One way,” He leaned next to my ear again. “Or another.” It didn’t take a genius to know it was a threat… That and him squeezing his legs into my sides. 

It was easy to tell I wasn’t going to be able to go anywhere anytime soon…

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers GRAND EDITION for Switch ;; More, Blood ー Yuma Dark [09]

ー The scene starts in Yui’s bedroom

Yui: ...Zzー... Zzー...

*THUD*

Yui: !?

*Rustle*

Yui: ( What!? What was that sound!? )

*THUD THUD*

Yuma: Come on! How long ya gonna be snoozin’ for, huh!? Get yer ass out of bed!!

Yui: Y-Yuma-kun!?

Yuma: If ya don’t show up soon, imma fuckin’ wreck ya together with this damn door!!

*THUD THUD*

Yui: I-’ll open the door! I’ll open it, so please stop kicking!

ー The scene shifts to the hallway

Yuma: Geez, why do I have to...Hm? Oh, ya finally woke up, huh?

Yui: W-What on earth is going on...Wait, Yuma-kun, those clothes...

Yuma: Ya better get changed right away as well! Ruki asked me to have ya get ready and bring ya with me in time.

Yui: Get changed? You mean into my uniform?

( For one, he never told me anything about going to school... )

Yuma: What else? Do ya go to school naked or somethin’? Aahn?

Aah, I guess I shouldn’t put that past ya. Whatcha say? I wouldn’t mind, honestly?

It’d save me time when I suck yer blood since I won’t have to bother takin’ them off. Hehe, guess I should have ya do that at home from now on?

Yui: D-Definitely not!! Anyway, I’m gonna go get changed so wait here.

*Thud*

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene shifts to inside the car

Yui: ( So they do have a limousine as well...I wonder if this is normal in the Vampire world? )

( ...Or rather... )

( Yuma-kun seems really irritated... )

Yuma: Geez, ya stupid bitch. ‘Cause ya took yer damn sweet time, we’re totally late!

Ruki and the others already left before us. Who do ya think is gonna get yelled at afterwards, huh?

Yui: ( Then he could have just come wake me up sooner...But I can’t say that, can I? )

I’m sorry...

Yuma: If ya can apologize to me, then take Ruki’s stupid lecture in my place! Ahー ah! This is such a damn drag, fuck!

Honestly, how did I somehow end up havin’ to raise this dumb-as-fuck Sow?

If only she was as smart as a dog at least, it’d be somewhat more bearable...

Yui: ( Per usual, he doesn’t hold back with his insults... )

Anyway, Yuma-kun, why are we suddenly going to school? It hasn’t been brought up until today...

Yuma: Ya really think I know? I just obey that man’s orders.

Yui: That man...?

( Sounds like he respects this individual quite a bit... )

Yuma: Well, if it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t be takin’ ya to school. Those guys will be there as well after all.

Yui: ...You mean Ayato-kun and the others?

Yuma: Who else?

Hahーah, pretty sure we’ll be in deep shit if we run into each other on campus.

Speakin’ of which, aren’t ya curious ‘bout them?

Yui: Me...?

I wouldn’t say it hasn’t crossed my mind...But I’m sure they’re all upset so I might be a little scared to meet them...

Yuma: Hm...

Say, what was yer life with them like?

Yui: What do you mean?

Yuma: They like ya enough to throw a fuckin’ tantrum the moment ya suddenly disappear, no?

How did ya manage to wrap that troublesome bunch ‘round yer lil’ finger like that? I’m actually kinda interested to hear.

Yui: I don’t have them wrapped around my finger. I just lived a normal life...

Yuma: ...Heeh.

ー Yuma suddenly pins her down

*Rustle*

Yui: ...!?

Yuma: A normal life, huh...? Say they suddenly pinned ya down like this? And thenーー

*Rustle*

Yui: Wai...!

Yuma: Ya had yer blood sucked after they ripped the clothes off yer body, right? That what ya call a normal lifestyle?

Say...Is havin’ yer blood sucked normal to ya? Aahn?

Selection

→ Of course not! (S)

Yui: Of course it isn’t normal! It hurts, and it’s scary...

Yuma: Haahn? Then why did ya say ‘normal’ earlier? You’re contradictin’ yerself.

Yui: That was just a figure of speech...

Yuma: Like I give a damn. At least take responsibility for yer own words.

Geez, and here I thought ya finally learnt to speak for yerself, but now ya go changin’ yer mind every five seconds.

Can’t ya make up yer mind and stick with it?

→ It might have become that way (M)

Yui: It might have actually become normal to me...

Yuma: Hah! Then why did ya keep on tellin’ me ‘no!’ or ‘stop’, huh? Were ya just actin’ to be all pure and innocent?

What’s the deal with ya, huh...? Were ya actually happy inside this whole time even though ya kept on sayin’ no?

Yui: That’s wrong...!

Yuma: It’s not. Don’t ya feel the same right now? I’ve got ya pinned down underneath me, but you’re barely puttin’ up a fight, are ya?

Yui: ( That’s because his grip on my arms is just too strong, I can’t fight back even if I wanted to... )

Yuma: Well, regardless of how ya actually feel, ya described it as ‘normal’. In that case, I’ll roll with it too. 

Then I won’t be holdin’ back either, latchin’ onto ya as is ‘normal’, regardless of the time or place...Nn...

ー Yuma bites her

Yui: ( Says the person who has never held back in the first place...! )

Yuma: ...Mmh...

Yui: Uu, ah...!

Yuma: Nn...Nn...

...Haah...

Heh, yer blood really is the only thing that’s delicious. Is this what did those Sakamaki’s in too?

*Thud*

Yui: ( My head’s spinning... )

Yuma: Hah. Look at that ecstatic (1) expression of yers. Ya really are a ‘Sow’. (2)

No matter how desperately ya try and deny it, the fact you’ve gotten used to havin’ this sorta stuff done to ya, proves that you’re a full-fletched ‘Sow’.

You’re a woman who simply gets swept away by the pleasure, lacking any sense of reason, free will or virtue.

Yui: ( That’s not true... )

ー Yuma steps back

Yuma: Ahーah...This is exactly why those without any pride are dull as heck. They give in the moment they feel a lil’ good.

Oi, ya better wake me up when we get to school. It’s a pain after all. 

Monologue

Tossing me on one of the seats,

and if he was fed up with me, Yuma-kun dozed off.

...Just like Yuma-kun said,

have I perhaps been converted (流されている)?

Having my blood sucked (吸われる) is painful and frightening,

and if possible, I would rather not have it happen to me.

ーー However, do I truly dislike it

This question I posed myself before, pops up in my mind once again.

To help shake off said thought,

I squeezed my numb fingertips tightly. (3)

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) 飛んだような顔 or ‘tonda youna kao’ literally means ‘a face as if you jumped’. The verb 飛ぶ or ‘tobu’ is used in this sense quite a lot within the DL franchise. From my understand, it describes the faces Yui makes when she loses herself in the pleasure from having her blood sucked.

(2) めすぶた or ‘mesubuta’ is also used as slang to refer to a ‘slut’ or ‘whore’. 

(3) I struggled with this line a lot, so I am sorry if my translation is a bit off. Yui specifies that she can’t seem to move her fingertips, but this kind of confused me as well because then how is she squeezing them?? Unless it’s just the fingertips of her one hand but that seems kind of odd as well. 

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[rkived]

drabble #2: pediatricsurgeon!jk is sure he only has a tiny crush on generalsurgeon!reader, but neurosergeon!taehyung makes him face the reality of how big that little crush actually is.

or, in which, hypothetically speaking, would jungkook mind you going on a date with obgyn!jimin? (hospitalplaylist!au) 

↩  previous | 📍drabbles masterlist | next ↪️

‘‘Yeah, yeah,’’ Taehyung spoke, rolling his eyes as he makes his way to seat next to Jungkook, who was having his dinner.

And by dinner, it’s the microwavable Top Ramen his office’s pantry is filled with.

He opens his mouth, finger pointing at it as the silent request for Jungkook to feed him ‘‘No, I mean─’’

He does and now Taehyung’s mouth is stuffed with noodles, interrupting his conversation as he mumbles the last of his words, though they’re incoherent.

‘‘Mph─?” he garbles “I’m having dinner.’’ he answers after swallowing and Jungkook stifles a laugh at his annoyed expression, he can’t tell if Taehyung’s unpleased with the person on the phone or with his mischievous action ‘‘What? No! I’m having dinner at work.’’

By the way he’s speaking, the pediatrician figures out who his friend’s talking to. 

‘‘Yoonah?’’ Jungkook mouths and Taehyung nods, there’s a glimmer of annoyance in his eyes. 

Taehyung huffs, switching the phone to his other hand as he takes Jungkook’s chopsticks to feed himself more noodles ‘‘Okay, y’know what? I’ll call you later, babe.’’ and the neurosurgeon's girlfriend is not allowed to answer back because Taehyung has already ended the call, putting his personal phone on airplane mode and placing it on one of his lab coat’s pockets.

He groans, exhausted. Taehyung never looked like this, not even after a big surgery. Jungkook doesn’t even make an effort to take his chopsticks and ramen back. 

‘‘You should break up with her already.’’ Jungkook casually advices and it’s obvious this is isn’t the first time the topic has been discussed. 

Taehyung shakes his head slightly, cheeks stuffed with noodles and the pediatrician wants to squeeze them for the fun of it, but his friend’s annoyed so Jungkook might just get it. 

Taehyung swallows and he sighs ‘‘I’m too old to date again,’’ he explains and Jungkook prepares himself to hear his friend’s excuse for the upteenth time ‘‘and Yoonah is a pain in the ass, but she puts up with me. I have to meet her halfway.’’

Jungkook knows it’s not because of that.

Taehyung isn’t old, but once he turned thirty he had deemed himself ancient. The neurosurgeon even cried while they all sang him the ‘happy birthday’ song. 

Also, Yoonah is a twenty-two-year-old model and she’s pretty, so there’s that.

‘‘You should mind your business,’’ Taehyung spoke ‘‘you’re old too, yet your ass is single.’’ 

Jungkook did get it after all.

‘‘I’m not old, I’m still in my twenties.’’ Jungkook argued and his friend laughed out loud enough to be heard by the passer-bys outside the pediatrician’s office. 

‘‘Barely,’’ Taehyung replied after calming down ‘‘you’ll be thirty in a few months, say goodbye to your youth.’’ he says this bitterly, like he resents the natural aging a human has to go through. 

The pediatrician sighs, eyes closed ‘‘Taehyung, turning thirty does not equal to being old, in fact, thirty is the new twenty!’’ 

He read that somewhere, probably one of those lame Facebook posts that definitely a thirty-year old wrote to makes themselves feel better. Taehyung’s thirty-two so he can attest that that’s not true at all. 

‘‘Anyway, right now I’m focused on my career,’’ Jungkook continues ‘‘I can think about settling down later.’’ 

Taehyung hums, unimpressed ‘‘Fine, die alone then.’’ 

The familiar ringtone of Jungkook’s phone is the conversation ender between the two. Jungkook smiles lightly at the way your name displays on the screen. 

Taehyung chuckles ‘‘Or don’t.’’

Jungkook ignores him and answers his phone with a chirpy tone ‘‘Hey, you coming?’’ he asks and he can hear papers being stacked in the background, he guesses you’re rearranging stuff in your office like you always tend to do once a week, apparently it brings you sanity. 

‘‘Yeah, in like, ten minutes’’ you say and Jungkook knows you’ll be right on time, he hopes he’s still here by then. 

You’ve been a little too busy lately and he’s been unable to have a face-to-face conversation these days, coincidentally falling on a time where he’s fully aware of his tiny crush on you. 

Maybe it’s a good thing, but now he goes stupid whenever he bumps into you around the hospital’s hallways because he’s not mentally prepared when he sees you. He’s never able to fully explain why he stumbles over his words when this happens.

You hang up, explaining you need to finish something up before you’re able to stop by his office and Jungkook doesn’t let you know he already knows what you’re doing, instead telling you he’ll wait for your arrival.

‘‘Ah, Namjoon was right,’’ Taehyung speaks up ‘‘this is serving me Med School vibes.’’ 

‘‘You’re thirty-two, please don’t talk like that.’’ Jungkook reminds him, there’s a whine in his voice and he physically cringes at his friend’s usage of the new slang terms.

Taehyung frowns ‘‘Thought I was young.’’ 

‘‘This is not Med School, alright?’’ the pediatrician clarifies, standing up from his place on the couch to take the finished Top Ramen his friend had ate for him and throwing it in the trash ‘‘I am mature now, I can control my emotions better.’’ he guarantees.

‘‘Oh yeah?’’ Taehyung retorts and Jungkook nods, he seems sure of himself ‘‘So, let’s say that─hypothetically speaking─Jimin asks Y/N out on a date and she said yes, would you get upset?’’

Jungkook hums ‘‘OBGYN Park Jimin?’’ he asks and Taehyung nods ‘‘Hypothetically speaking, he doesn’t have a chance on going on a date with her.’’ he answers with a tight lipped smile.

‘‘Hypothetically speaking, why not?’‘ Taehyung prods. 

The pediatrician scoffs, thinking this conversation was absurd and quickly taking another direction ‘‘Because, hypothetically speaking, Y/N is out of his league,’’ he entertains the idea anyway ‘‘and yes, that includes medical fields.’’ 

Taehyung stands up abruptly ‘‘Okay, pause, are you trying to say that bringing a baby into the world is lesser than a common surgery? Where does that place me then?”

‘‘Hypothetically speaking.’’ Jungkook says through gritted teeth ‘‘Why are you bringing that up, anyway?’’ he asks because even though Taehyung always talked about the randomest shit, it always made sense in the end. 

His friend shrugs his shoulders, like there’s no particular reason ‘‘I don’t know, maybe Jimin’s interested,’’ he teases ‘‘maybe not.’’ 

Jungkook’s heartbeat races up and he’s come to understand why Namjoon gave him that diagnosis a few weeks back. 

He’s nervous. 

---

By the time you stop by, Taehyung’s long gone having already lit the match, but not bothering to wait and watch it burn. 

You so kindly came with an iced americano for him and a small cupcake to indulge yourself in, a small reward for the succesful surgery you had done earlier that day.

Jungkook is trying to listen to you explain to him what the process was like, but your words sound like an echo in his head instead. He can’t help but to think about Taehyung’s stupid—but valid—hypothetical situation.

Well, he’s sure he’s not madly in love with you. Like, he hasn’t reached that level—yet. If anything, this crush is a ‘I think you’re really pretty and smart and nice and sweet and cool’ sort of crush.

Fuck, this is actually giving him Med School vibes too.

“Would you go out on a date with Park Jimin?” he interjects and his brain is yelling at him, perhaps he should seek Taehyung’s help next “Hypothetically speaking.” he adds once he notices the raise of your eyebrow.

You cross your arms over your chest, glancing somewhere else “Uhm,” you really don’t know what to answer, thinking that entertaining Jungkook’s out of the blue questions usually don’t end up well “I don’t know—I guess?”

“Hypothetically speaking, right?” Jungkook asks, but it sounds like he’s begging for you to tell him that the situation would never happen.

“Sure,” you shrug “he seems like a nice guy.”

Jungkook tries not to yell in frustration.

There’s no backstory to him and the OBGYN. The pediatrician only resents the fact that Jimin had become residents’s favorite doctor, taking Jungkook’s spotlight away. He had made peace with it, there was something about that guy that was indeed charming.

But now, this opens up the possibility of you being on Jimin’s league. He tries not to let Taehyung’s words affect him, but what if the OBGYN really is interested?

Jungkook knows his neurosurgeon friend and the bright smile guy get along quite well, have caught them eating together at the hospital’s cafeteria more than once.

Does...does this mean Jungkook has competition? Is he actually going to have to do something about this tiny —not so tiny— crush?

A lightbulb pops over Jungkook’s head instead “Hypothetically speaking, would you go out on a date with me?”

“Okay, what’s up with you?” there’s laughter in your tone and Jungkook doesn’t like the way you can’t seem to take him seriously.

“Y/N!” he whines “just answer, it’s hypothetical anyway.” Yeah, hypothetical.

You sigh, there’s a level of patience you have to have for dealing with him. You’ve studied it and have learnt it for the past decade and few years of being friends with him. Yet, you still have to prepare yourself every time.

“Are we friends in this hypothetical context?” you ask and he narrows his eyes at you, does that change your answer? He nods anyway “Mmm, yeah, sure.”

Jungkook wants to yell in excitement now, but he’ll wait for when he’s in the privacy of his home.

He’s in your league too, then!

He can’t help but smile anyway, but you mistake it with him making fun of you, because this is something he could possibly use to embarrass you later on.

“You’re so weird.” you mumble, drifting your gaze somewhere else as if to hide from him.

You make a mental note to threaten him about not revealing this information to any of your friends later on. Right now, it’s actually sort of cute seeing his bunny-like smile.

a/n: i be like “don’t be shy, write some more :)” kssjsjsjsj [roblox death sound] n e way here’s some more pediatrician!jk x gs!reader for y’all this is purely self indulgent at this point but u know what ??? i am at peace with that