#sp reference again | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

seraphdreams · 10 months ago

Text

SMILE, YOU'RE ON CAMERA. | YUUTA OKKOTSU.

𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — synopsis. when taking care of your university finances proves troublesome, the universe grants you your very own savior. but it’s gonna cost you.

𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — cw. smut, college au!yuuta / bimbo reader (obvi), filming, lots of porn references… a lot, virginity loss, praise, oral n fingering, slight obsession, pussydrunk yuuta, unprotected love making, yuuta’s rich and unsettling. mdni <3

𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — word count. 5.3k

𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 — dolled up! omg, yuuta? i meant to have this out a few weeks ago but got caught in a little writing slump :( nevertheless, here’s to a new year and a new fic! yuuta’s been slowly creeping his way up my favs list , tehe !! as always, please reblog / comment if you enjoyed this , it’ll fill me with joy. thank u ♡

you’re a pornstar.

albeit, an amateur one with heaps to learn regarding the ruthless industry, but the weight still stands.

the details in which you came to the jarring conclusion were muddled with the convoluted steps that it took for you to get there, murky in your bubblegum-filled mind. all you knew was that yuuta okkotsu was a force, a gentle one, to be reckoned with.

it must’ve played out once you returned to your campus dorm beyond the dusk of midnight, under an unmitigating fatigue from the twelve hour waitressing shift just prior. through abhorrent patrons and the lack of a spendable paycheck, the excruciatingly long night barely made you enough money to even think about buying those dollish pumps you’ve been yearning for. how cruel.

in between working and haphazardly handing your earnings over to university fees and textbooks, you just couldn’t seem to make ends meet.

you would curse the day you took it upon yourself to branch away financially from your parents under the guise of growing up, since now it’d be a blessing to have even a cellphone bill paid off. whatever the issue seemed to be, lady luck was truly never bothered enough to be on your side.

fortunately for you, though, it was that same arduous night, you had been huddled against your stuffed animals in bed, mindlessly scrolling through the various social media apps on your phone; switching from sites like instagram and twitter to youtube then right back to instagram all over again, only to be met with an offer dusted in pink glitter that caught your eye as if it were made for you.

“stars needed — will pay upfront.”

it was a shoddy story post, one that could be clicked past and forgotten forever — yet, a brisk reminder of your situation in the form of borrowed, used textbooks with pages missing or vandalized, and today’s horoscope that said to take risks; you did exactly that, aiming a swipe up that would ultimately rid you of the worries of yesterday.

there were no reasons as to why you couldn’t be a star. certainly, you had the face for it, and you were told by multiple charmers that you were beyond beguiling to get anything you could ever ask for. what dismay could possibly unfold from contacting .. yuuta okkotsu .. about his offer?

hm, that’s funny. the name rang familiarity as it seeded in your mind.

must be one of yuuji’s friends.

itadori yuuji, your best friend of three years now. out of all the time you’d spent together, you came to realize that he could get along with anyone, despite their true intentions. he spoke highly of his friends as well, which earned him a sacred spot in your heart that couldn’t be replaced by anyone.

itadori had briefly mentioned in a ramen-fueled frenzy that one of his peers were “so insanely talented” and that you’d definitely get on with him. but when you asked for validity on that vague claim, all yuuji seemed to respond with was a mere “just meet him, you’ll see.”

from your recollection, the acquaintance he was boasting about, as if it was his own personal victory, was none other than your yuuta okkotsu. he was meek, stuck to a close-knit friend group consisting of maki and toge from your physics class, and the one time you ever spoke to him was to ask about yuuji’s whereabouts, to which he responded that he went back to his dorm after gojo-sensei’s lecture.

he seemed, normal. average, even. that surely had to be the case since your memory was hazy on his being otherwise.

it was true, though, yuuta was gifted. in a way that transcended words, skillful towards visual aesthetics, and careful with the craft. he would spend most of his freetime fumbling with a camera or recording the works of the mundane. overtly, he’d grown such a strong passion in the field of videography in hopes to capture the reality of humanity, the authenticity within intimacy — what could he possibly need a “star” for?

shadiness aside, you were in a tough spot, willing to do whatever to free yourself from the financial burden that was jujutsu technical university. with a swift swipe in tandem with the soft tapping of the pads of your thumbs on the keyboard, you were taking yuuta up on his offer.

within seconds, he responded back with his address and an appropriate meet-up date to start the project.

if only you were aware of how drastically your life would change from here on out.

a cluster of days had passed since you last got into contact with yuuta. he had told you to meet him at his place, claiming it would be more efficient than traveling to an unnamed destination with pounds of heavy photography equipment.

where you stood currently, was in front of the bare oak of his front door, hand wrapped in a loose fist as you knocked gently on the wood. a quick moment had passed by before you took initiative to raise your fist and knock once more. before your touch could meet the wood, a muffled “coming!” chimed beyond the door. from what you had heard on the other side; the scuttling behind the door and jingle of the lock, yuuta had opened the door soon after.

with his hand rubbing away the goosebumps that stood at the back of his neck, he beamed. cordially, warmly.

“you’re actually here. hi,”

upon first glance, yuuta had a distinct look. he stood tall, not tall enough to matter or incite intimidation, and although he wore a black button-up (a bit formal for an occasion as casual as today), his lean build shone through under the thin fabric, ripples of veins dancing up his forearms. what you couldn’t miss, however, were the grey eyebags under his emotionless navy orbs, as if he’d forgone weeks of sleep.

yuuta okkotsu was unsettling.

“hi,” your voice sounded as a sweet croon, dulcet enough that you could barely hear it yourself as it escaped in a breathy breeze. his smile grew softer in response, that monotonous gaze in his eyes fizzling away into something of serenity. “come in, please,” yuuta held the door open wider for you to tread past, caught up in observing the bunch of fabric that hugged tightly around your ass, then closed it gently behind you once you stepped completely inside. he silently cursed at himself for ogling — he truly didn’t mean to stare. you’re just a lot prettier up close. “i was just getting set up. you can have a seat if you’d like.”

as you’d expect from any guy your age, his place wasn’t much to gaze at, nor did it have much personality. in a corner to your right was a houseplant, that of the fern variety, and a few steps deeper into the abode was the living room, where yuuta resumed his fumbling with the transfiguration of his tripod.

you decided to sit on the couch across from him, taking in the bleak sight of his home. you would have almost believed it was unlived in had it not been for the scattered midterm review papers decorating his coffee table. it was obvious he had money from the endless rows of space that surrounded the two of you, although a candle or something would be nice.

he peered away from his tripod to look through the viewfinder of his camera, ensuring that the lens was functioning properly. he grew pleased to see the image of you distracted in fiddling with your thumbs reflected back at him. “are you nervous?” his gaze fell upon you through his own eyes, a concerned expression harboring his features.

you were pulled out of your muse of unfamiliarity to direct your attention to the sound of his mild voice, returning a smile to his that eased the worriment trapped behind dull, blue eyes. “n-not really, i don’t think.”

his lips curled up once more at that, in fact there wasn’t a time so far that you hadn’t noticed him without his signature smile. “here, let me help with that,” reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone, tapping away at the screen before ultimately turning it back off and settling it back into its place in his pocket.

your phone vibrated beside you, screen lighting up with a bold alert.

[YUUTA OKKOTSU SENT $1000]

before you had a chance to even process the significance of the notification, he started back up,

“i hope i got the right information, wouldn’t want your hard work to get in the wrong hands.” the tilt of his head in tandem with a chuckle resonated sheepishly, and he returned to watch you through his camera lens.

he was right. the money did soothe your nerves.

“i’ve barely done anything yet.” a ditzy giggle followed soon after your sentence, a sound that yuuta couldn’t possibly ignore. you were already starting to pull at his heartstrings.

“and you’ve done it so perfectly,” his praise left you flustered in that moment and you bit down softly on your lower lip to keep your smile at bay. “thank you, yuuta.”

you would’ve never guessed that your introverted classmate had enough experience in him to be such a flirt, or have your cheeks heating up with fervid affection, no less. but maybe yuuta was just like that; maybe this had been natural.

“no, thank you.” his thumb hovered over the record button just as his eyes met your gaze over the brim of the camera. “would you like to start now?”

he took the nod of your head as confirmation to press the record button, finally getting started with the project.

you blinked blankly at him as he tilted his head and flashed a warmhearted grin. “how old are you?” was his first question. he had asked while rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. as he did so, you took notice of the silver ring donned around his finger.

he couldn’t have been married, no?

keeping your answer as vague as possible for the sake of matching his comforting warmth, you responded, “twenty-something.” he let out a satisfied huff of air as he nodded and moved onto his next query.

“and what’s your major?”

with the question barely having enough time to linger in the suggestively tense air, he added, “you’re very beautiful, by the way. do you mind taking your dress off for me?”

as much as it should’ve alarmed you, you were swayed by his toothachingly inviting timbre, its gentleness pulling compliancy from you in a matter of a few mere words. you only shook your head, forgoing the short piece of fabric that clung to each curve and dip of your body while your nipples hardened under the glacial, artificial breeze of his home. once the silk pooled at your hips, that, along with your panties were dropped onto the floor, leaving you bare and vulnerable under the camera — and yuuta’s watchful eye.

he swallowed thickly at the sight, remaining as respectful as he could despite the monster growing in his pants; his eyes locked right back onto yours as if he’d get striked down for moving them even a millimeter south. “are you a virgin?” he queried, opting to move his hand from awkwardly at his side to fidgeting with the button at his shirt, ultimately undoing it and revealing another inch of skin at his heated chest.

from the nature of what you had signed yourself up for, you were hesitant to answer his question. of course you needed experience to be a star, and with you lacking the preconceived ability, you could kiss your $1000 goodbye..

yet he looked at you with an expectant gaze. no traces of malice in his eyes or frustration from your quick witted silence, but merely, with patience. and in that moment you couldn’t find it within yourself to lie.

“i am,” out of shame, you curled in on yourself, hoping that the sofa would engulf you, and your feelings, crossing your arms over your bare chest as if it’d create a wall of privacy behind your own humiliation. “is that okay?”

yuuta’s being only grew warmer at the response, you figured he’d be hot to the touch by now, from searing pleasure or unshakeable cordiality, you wouldn’t know. “yeah, that’s okay,” it came out breathier than he would’ve liked, a telltale sign of his aching desire. “that’s more than okay.”

truth be told, he had never met anyone as enchanting as you. you looked up at him with such trust in your eyes that it daunted him — fear that the assurance he wielded from you would shatter beneath him, and he’d be drowning. in a sea of his own wistfulness. now that he had you, he couldn’t let you go.

you were on to make a breathtaking star.

now feeling less coy than before, you relaxed your head into the palm of yuuta’s hand. you hadn’t noticed how long he’d been stroking at your cheek, or when he closed the vexing proximity between the two of you, all that mattered in that moment was the roll of his gentle vocables flowing through your ears and the thumb of his that graciously caressed your cheek.

you came to realize that he was much more handsome this way as your eyes toured his own, then down to the sliver of sweat-sheened skin peeking from underneath the black veil of his shirt, then down to his…

he’s so fucking hard.

confined against his slacks was his cock that leaked an ample amount even while it was untouched. you could make out its silhouette, something girthy, perhaps heavy, but nothing like you’d expect from yuuta. uncharacteristically huge.

“yuuta.” you whispered, mainly to yourself, as your mouth began to water at the sight, and his cheeks dusted pink once he realized what you were fixated upon.

“do you wanna,” he started up but faltered soon after when your lidded gaze flitted back up towards his. never had he felt so weak before, it was as if you’d casted a spell on him. “do you maybe want to—” he paused to avert his own gaze and embarrassment. “—put it in your mouth?”

he could’ve sworn he heard the increase of his heartbeat in his ears when you crinkled your brows, pretty face forming into an even prettier pout.

“but i’ve never—”

he stopped you before you could start, interjecting his own voice of reassurance.

“it’s okay. i’ll guide you,” taking his camera off its stand and moving the rest of the configuration elsewhere, he held it in one hand to better capture the scene unfolding before him. “just try your best for me, okay?”

“okay.” when he returned your concern with a small smile, you took it upon yourself to undo the arrangement of his pants, carefully hooking your finger into the elastic waistband of his briefs and pulling down just enough for his length to spring free.

for what felt like minutes, you marveled at his sheer size, wondering how anyone of his nature could possibly be hiding something like that. it curved upwards with a prominent vein or two running up the underside while it continued to leak, so much so, that you had to collect it all at the tip with your finger.

the tip? flushed the prettiest pink you’d ever witnessed and was as bulbous as it was mushroomed, you knew you’d have a bit of difficulty trying to fit into your mouth. it seemed to twitch under the fanning of your breath to which yuuta let out a whine of pure impatience.

“can i..?” your words trailed off when you involuntarily found yourself pressing chaste kisses along the length of his cock until they met with his sticky tip; a recreated scene from the various porn videos you’d seen. the sensation sent a jolt of palpable pleasure through his being, yuuta’s dark hair curtaining over his eyes while he made a damn good attempt at silencing his moans, with his teeth sunken into his bottom lip.

your eyes kept watch at his wavering expression while you wrapped your hand at the base of his length and began to pump slowly, yet another thing you had learned through the fascinating world of porn.

“suck it,” it was clear to you that yuuta had grown desirously impatient from your teasing, looking down at you with a hint of hunger in his beautiful orbs. “please?”

you took his words as an incentive to finally give him what he’s been leaking for, wrapping gloss-sheened lips around the thick inches of his tip, accommodating for the stretch with a dulcet whine that reverberated deeply within him. had you not been caught up in building the gradual bob of your head, he would’ve kissed you, left you with smeared lips and a tongue that ached for only him upon seeing the sinful sight of innocent eyes fixated on his own. you’re beautiful. truly, to die for.

caught all on tape to be watched over and over again.

at the bliss, yuuta’s lip parted open, alotting for a slur of groans turned whimpers to tumble past. “you- you’re already doing, so good.” he praises, the words floating on his breath. his free hand finds itself back at your face, thumbing the warmth of your hallowed cheek while he captured the moment behind his lens. once you came to a comfortable rhythm, you couldn’t stop yourself from dipping your fingers between your thighs to ease the evergrowing ache in your core. in fact, you’d been like this since the moment yuuta spoke a word to you, lightheaded and malleable — what he’s beginning to love most about you.

your digits collected slick at your entrance, the immeasurable amount of essence that you’d pool providing ample leeway for you to sink three fingers inside, pumping at the same rhythm in which you’re sucking yuuta. soft fingertips curling against your gummy walls weren’t enough, though, and when he had caught notice of your weakening resolve, his hips involuntarily bucked into your mouth.

“sorry, ‘m sorry,” he began, with a choked moan. “just- so close, so fucking close. c-can you take me in deeper?”

the hum of assurance that sounded from you sent vibrations coursing through his cock, from tip to base. had you not been preoccupied with chasing your own high, you would’ve missed the pitchy moan he let out just after. with your palm now pressed up against your clit while you worked in tandem to pleasure the nub and your greedy hole, you attempted to swallow another stubborn inch of him.

simultaneous with the bobbing of your head, he matched your pace, abdomen flexing when the white-hot pleasure became too much and he could feel it in his ears. he wanted so badly to throw his head back, completely lose himself in bliss, but he had a job to do. he wouldn’t dare let the sight of your glassy lidded eyes and glossy lips struggling to wrap themselves around the stretch of his dick go unfilmed, unseen.

as his tip continued to prod the back of your throat and your fingers aided you in relieving the discomfort from your cunt, you found yourself just dangling off the dangerous edge of your release, strokes away from making a mess — and yuuta did too.

it wasn’t long until his head started spinning, legs got weaker, and his core coiled tighter; all the signs of a mindblowing orgasm, and blew his mind, you did. “baby- y/n, if you keep doing that- i might cum.” what he was referring to was the way you fondled his balls in the warmth of your soft hands, yet another trick you had learned from porn. “i don’t wanna cum in your mouth but if you—,”

a jumbled slew of curses flowed from his lips as he did the inevitable, shot his load deep down your throat, gently thrusting his cock in shallow strokes to jettison every last remaining drop. the taste on your tongue was nothing like you’d be warned of before. yuuta wasn’t bitter, he went down easy.

hell, you’d use his cum as a condiment for desserts if you could.

in a matter of moments, your own high had washed over you like cold water over a heated body, much needed and refreshing. once he hesitantly pulled out from the heat of your mouth, cock still hard and twitching for more, he gently pushed back strands of loose hair behind your ear.

“can i see?”

you held out your cream-slickened fingers, sopping with your juices as yuuta proceeded to catch how they dripped on camera. he then took your palm, with the cadence of a knight kissing the back of a princess’s hand, and slipped the soiled digits into his mouth. his tongue lavved around your index and middle fingers while he hummed satisfactorily at your taste. “you’re just as sweet as i imagined.” he smiled, finding amusement in your post-orgasmic, dazed state.

“do you do this with a lot of other girls, yuuta?” you queried, taking the time to scan your eyes over his face. it was as if he seemed to get more attractive as your time with him went on. he tilted his head slightly, finding your question endearing. “you’re my first, actually.” yuuta responded softly, as if his normal speaking voice would be too heavy on your delicate ears.

you jumped at the chance to tease him as he did you, placing your thumb back over the slit of his hard-on and lightly rubbing; which resonated within yuuta as a tonal mewl. a little smile pulled at your lips when you got your perfect reaction. “can you be my first?”

“i’d love to be,” he took your request with unadulterated honor as if he’d been tasked by the deities above to serve you. “just- just lay back for me. i promise i’ll take good care of you.”

and that you did; conforming to his call of request with such compliance it made his heart swell. you had positioned your body to rest languidly against the seat of the sofa, shaky legs hesitant to spread fully while your hand roamed up your sternum to find solace in kneading your tits.

he couldn’t deny how beautiful you looked, laid out for him as such. how had he been so lucky to be the only one to have the opportunity to marvel at the scene? with a steady hand, he faintly trails his hand up the expanse of your inner thigh, a silent beckon for you to open your legs wider. involuntarily so, your body had accepted his presence and allowed for the spreading of your thighs.

what you’d come to notice with yuuta was that he was watchful, observant. he seemed to pick up on every detail, even the minuscule bits that were most likely to fly over anyone else’s head, had been taken into account. it’s probably why he’s immensely proficient at what he does. not once had he allowed himself to miss the labored heaving of your chest, or the sheen of sweat thinly coating your body — the twitching of your clit when he stroked featherlight touches at the nub. he couldn’t call himself a true cameraman then.

his fingers had collected remnants of your previous orgasm before they worked in tandem, both middle and ring, to prod at your sensitive hole, slowly sinking themselves in. it was almost embarrassing how quickly your greedy cunt swallowed him in, as if it’d been waiting for his touch for years now. “y-yuuta, ‘m still sensitive.” you crooned in response to his digits exploring your cavern, plush walls gripping him with such tautness that he’d found it difficult to even curl his fingers.

his own mind spun (and cock leaked) at the thought of that same warmth around his length, and when you called his name, all he could think about was how pretty you’d sound moaning it. he wouldn’t mind if you were sonorous, if the neighbors would hear, if inumaki who lived downstairs would come knocking with a mouthful of complaints, if the whole world knew his name; because in that moment, yuuta okkotsu was yours.

yuuta okkotsu was in love.

after some shallow pumping, enough to have your legs attempting to enclose around his arm, yuuta had pulled his digits out and replaced the lost sensation with the fat tip of his cock stroking your slit up and down.

“i’m gonna put it in, okay? if you want me to stop, tell me. if i'm going too fast or slow, let me know.”

he perused your face for a hint of an answer, seemingly nothing going on behind your vacant, large eyes. your initial response was curt, an ode to the simplistic nature of your mind. “mhm.”

how endearing you were to him, just a unadorned reaction weakening his being, causing his heart to figuratively crumble within its confines against his ribcage. he had searched for a heartier answer, something tangible to hold on to, because, lord knows how terrible he’d feel if he took your indication the wrong way. “can you be vocal for me, please?”

you nodded your head. “i’ll let you know, yuuta.”

with a carefulness that only came from the most benign of beings, he had sunken the first inch of himself into your awaiting heat.

he was paused when your hand dashed to his lower abdomen, futilely pressing against the skin.

“wait—” you huffed wantonly. “—‘s too big.”

his eyes wavered with concern, hidden under the veil of pure arousal. in yuuta’s case he had dreamed of a compliment as self fulfilling as yours, for his thoughts of being average were shattered upon first inch. “should i stop?”

you shook your head, reveling in the light of his attentivity towards you and your body. “no,” you moved your hand from his abdomen. “don’t stop.”

one of his arms rested beside your head, helping to prop him up over your body while he dropped his head down to watch the way your bodies connected. gradually, the sight of his length slowly sinking inside, stretching you out further and further until he was in to the hilt flooded his vision. yuuta had caught on to your labored gasps, merely growing harder from your honeyed voice like music to his ears.

he then lifted his head, strands of inky, out-of-place tresses falling over his face and partially covering the depth of lingering eyes, that lingered for a second too long, causing that shuddering sensation you had once felt when you first met him to reappear. he held his camcorder beside his face, an all too cheerful grin masked over his features. “i’m all in!”

creepy.

there was no doubt that you hadn’t felt full. he practically spilled over with how much girth he possessed and throbbed innately within your walls. the swell of your tummy from just how deep he was, was enough to tear away at his composure and drag his length back before driving his hips in at a force unrecognizable to him. the yelp you had let out from his eager thrust dwindled into a blissful moan. “sorry, so sorry.” he whispered, unable to take his eyes off the faultless assortment of breathtaking features that was your face, eyebrows creased together, parted lips and eyes squeezed closed as if you’d been focused solely on the pleasure he was giving you.

his next thrust stroked softer than its predecessor, having no remnants of eagerness but instead, the nuance of a man that’d been simply smitten.

the meticulousness of his ministrations coursed through your body wondrously, each push and pull lathered in lust, savored to be remembered for the rest of his time on earth. it was as if he’d known your body for years, knew every dip and fold, every swell and mast, aware of what exactly it took to leave your body hungry for his touches.

you’d grown comfortable in the pace at which he set, your mind hazing over each time the blunt tip grazed along your gspot. he peppered kisses along your jaw and down your sternum, the fanning of his warm breath against your chest doing the minimum in stiffening the peaks of your breasts. shootable footage forgotten, yuuta took your mound into his mouth, teeth gently rolling against your nipple which caused you to tighten around his cock in response, the sweetest mewl he’s ever heard from you tumbling from your throat.

“at least take me on a date first, yuuta..” the wittiness of your voice had earned a stifled smile from him, finding utmost admiration in the suggestion. he’ll be sure to take you up on your offer, just as you had done for him.

when you felt the familiar coil within you starting to build up once more, you dipped your hand down to rub at your clit in tandem with the increasing vigor of his strokes. the sensation was all too foreign to you, too pleasurable that you couldn’t keep your sounds at bay. “‘m so close, g-gonna cum!” you had warned, yuuta pulled away from your tit with a soft pop. he chose to rest his head at the juncture of your neck and shoulder, mindlessly chanting the words like a mantra.

“i love you, i love you,” his pace faltered, growing sloppier by the second. “love you, love you so much.”

intoxicated by your heat, your scent, just you being you, and being so perfect — yuuta was pussydrunk. incredibly so. never in his life had he ever felt as high as you made him. you were an angel, sent to him from heaven, to defile and mark.

quickly, your release surged through you in torrents of ecstasy, nothing that you’ve experienced before, coating yuuta’s cock in the glorious essence of you. “cumming!” you cry, to no avail particularly since yuuta wasn’t wholeheartedly aware of the situation at hand. his mind was clouded with you, just as you were full of him, wincing in the aftershocks of your fervent orgasm and convulsing around his length with need.

it wasn’t long before his own ununified thrusts came to a sudden close, signifying the warm spurts of cum painting your insides, filling you entirely to the brim and leaking down your ass from riding out his high.

“god, i love you.” he whined, pressing faint kisses to your neck, unable to peel himself away from your fervid body. coming to your senses, his words finally resonated for you. “we only just met.”

he pulled himself up, opting to look down at your flushed face with a vague hint of confusion on his face as he tilted his head. “have we?”

“we have.” you nodded.

to yuuta, he’s known you his whole life. you were the light of his existence, the fire in his heart. had he managed to confuse you with someone else? surely, that wasn’t the case.

once he pulled out of you, he made sure to capture the moment that you leaked his seed on film, but in that time, borrowed jealousy had filled his soul. he couldn’t share the tape as he had planned, no one else deserved to see you in the same way he did. no one.

he tucked himself back into his pants, leaving you bare and oozing for just one second to fetch a warm wet rag to clean you up with. when he came back, you noticed just how chipper he’d gotten, if that were even possible. “you were amazing,” he smiled, gently wiping your folds pristine. “i’m so grateful you came to me.” the smile you returned matched his own, “thank you, you were- really good too.”

he perked up, eyes moving from between your thighs to your face. “really?” and when you nodded to him, you could see the apparent relief flow within his being. “you know,” he started. “i’m very interested in you.”

you tilt your head, jutting your lips in a cute pout. “interested, how?”

the camcorder that now resided on his coffee table, unpresumebly documenting the scene on display was picked up by yuuta, and turned off. he grinned softly, eyes shutting from his ear to ear smile.

“may i take you on a date?”

5K notes · View notes

dreamlifebunny · 1 year ago

Text

manifestation ideas: revising the past

revision is a beautiful, life-affirming part of the law of assumption that reminds us that nothing is to be feared, because everything is changeable at all times. i ignored revision for so long in the beginning of my loass journey because i was afraid it was "too illogical" (classic), but after testing it last year it became one of the most healing things i've ever done for myself! you can find posts on revision all over tumblr, reddit, and most importantly, in this reading by neville. (let it be known that this post references bullying and abuse if you'd rather skip this - keep yourself safe!)

you can revise that you never watched your favourite tv/movies, read your favourite books, or listened to your favourite albums so that you get to experience them all over again for the first time!

nobody remembers any embarrassing or cringey moments that you have had (because they didn't happen!) or better yet, any of these moments have been revised to be happy and fun moments.

any former rejections have been revised; job offers, school offers, grants and applications have now all been accepted!

your family has been revised to be your absolute dream family; full of love, abundance, fun family adventures, togetherness and connection, support, and kindness. you can also revise your past so that you've always had younger or older siblings, if you grew up an only child and wanted siblings.

former bullies from school or work have come back to genuinely apologize for the hurt that they have brought you and offer reconciliation in whatever way you desire, whether that is publicly; in front of your school/colleagues, in a heartfelt letter expressing their regret, with an insane e-transfer of money (hehe), or any other desired way. either way, you get to see the regret that they feel and know that they have changed and wish they never hurt you (you can do this with abusers as well, if you feel comfortable with it - you never have to see those people again if you'd prefer they don't contact you to apologize, or you can revise it so that you never met them or never experienced them that way)

your loved one's pains or hurts can be revised so that they never happened.

you can revise your memories so that you have always experienced your family and loved ones in positive ways, or you can make it so that you remember the past and now get to experience the beautiful present!

didn't like the way a show or film ended? revise the ending so that your dream conclusion happened!

you can revise that your SP has been in love with you from the start!

your previous manifestation attempts that "failed" have been revised so that your desires came true, and your previous void state attempts that "failed" have been revised so that you already entered the void, and can now enter at any time!

#manifestation #law of assumption #neville goddard #loa #loassumption #void state #edward art #manifest #void #things to manifest #manifesting #law of consciousness #loass #bunny's originals

2K notes · View notes

1moreoffkeyanthem · 8 months ago

Text

EVERYONE READ IT RIGHT NOW!!! This story ATE!!!

ahhhhhhh it’s up!! the time has come!! final chapter is posted and i’m scared and excited and eagerly awaiting the response!!!

#the ending is so satisfying and nostalgic feeling aaaa #south park #sp style #them #fic recs #also there was a Through The Fire And The Flames reference so y’all know I got ATLCTS on my mind again Yee haw

8 notes · View notes

petrichor-idyllic · 2 years ago

Text

MINHO

MASTERLIST

CONTENT WARNINGS IN GREEN

NO SMUT OR EXPLICIT CONTENT

○ FLUFF | □ SPICE | ● ANGST |• HEADCANONS

◇ FEM! READER | ☆ GN! READER | 《》 MASC! READER

□ LONGING FROM AFAR ◇

↳ Minho has always been cocky and self-assured. That is until a girl arrives in the Glade. A girl he's had some interesting dreams about.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

• SOME HEADCANONS ◇

↳ Just some headcanons about our favourite Runner.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

□ FIRECRACKER ◇

↳ Minho finally agrees to teach you how to fight after weeks of pestering him. Though, things take an unexpected turn.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

○ SAFE PLACE ◇

↳ After you narrowly escape the vicious actions of another Glader who couldn't take no for an answer, you find refuge in Minho's hut - and his arms.

Contains references to sexual assault but there's nothing explicit.

○ UNDER THE INFLUENCE ◇

↳ After the Greenie Day celebrations leave you a little bit intoxicated, Minho takes care of you and keeps you safe.

○ HIDE AND SEEK ◇

↳ You're training to be a Runner and, as the Keeper, Minho is made to look after you. Though, things take a dramatic turn as Minho is forced to save your life.

□ LET ME MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER ◇

↳ Somehow, you end up giving your best friend a massage. Things go about as well as expected.

Basically the start of a bad porn scenario.

□ INAPPROPRIATE WORKPLACE BEHAVIOUR ◇

↳ You miss out on the Bonfire to stay to help Minho with the Maps. Unfortunately, he's a little distracted.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

□ AFTER THE CALM ◇

↳ Joining the group from the scorch, the Gladers take a blow after losing Newt to the Crank Palace. So, you help cheer Minho up.

Book-based fic. Contains suggestive content and spice.

□ BEYOND THE OTHER SIDE ◇

↳ Despite your feelings for one another, you and Minho have decided it's best to stay friends. But, after you nearly lose him to the clutches of the Maze, and he says some choice words to Gally - you decide enough is enough.

Book based fic. Some suggestive themes.

● ALL YOU HAVE ◇

↳ Minho has always had you by his side. He doesn't know how he'd cope without you. Well, now he might have to learn how.

Bro, you die. Rip.

WARMTH IN COLD PLACES ◇ ➤

○ PART 1 | □ PART 2

↳ You are an undercover agent for The Right Arm working behind enemy lines in WCKD's headquarters. Your simple intel gig ends up being the least of your problems as you're suddenly put on the front lines of a rescue mission. It doesn't help that the boy you're pretending to keep prisoner is pretty cute.

□ BEHAVE ◇

↳ You're obsessed with your boyfriend. It's just so hard to keep your hands off of him - even when he's working.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

□ MIRAGE OF THE PAST ◇

↳ Despite never seeing Minho before, you swear you recognise him. That's why you're always staring. Well, and the man is fine. Now in your place of refuge, the Safe Haven provides you with a home, and a new sense of freedom. A bit of flirting can't hurt, right?

Contains suggestive content and spice.

○ IT TAKES TIME ◇

↳ You were immediately attracted to Minho when you met him in the Scorch. Now, after six months and many losses, you're reunited.

○ STAY CLOSE 《》

↳ Your dream of becoming a Runner is crushed time and time again. But that doesn't stop you from running out into the Maze to help Minho and Alby. Though, that doesn't mean you're the only one willing to risk your life to protect those you care about.

□ FRIENDLY COMPETITION ◇

↳ A friendly game of capture the flag turns heated thanks to yours and Minho's competitive spirit.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

○ SOFT AT HEART ◇

↳ Soft, sweet and caring; you're the mother of the Glade.

○ BLIND EYE ◇

↳ Minho has a crush on you. You're oblivious. He's losing his mind.

○ DECEPTION IN LIBERATION ◇

↳ You're from Group B. Meeting someone in the middle of a prison break is one hell of an introduction.

□ HIGH SCHOOL NOT-SO-SWEET-HEARTS ◇

↳ High school AU. Minho is popular and sporty. You're quiet and smart. It's a stereotypical high-school romance, except Minho is the one tripping over himself for you. And, well, you don't believe him.

Contains suggestive content and spice. Minho won't accept your rejection.

○ HOW TO WINGMAN (POORLY) ☆

↳ Everyone in the Glade is sick of watching you and Minho dance around your feelings for each other. So, they decide to do something about it. Well, they attempt to, at least.

○ DIE FOR YOU ☆

↳ Song fic based off of "Die for You" by The Weekend.

ON YOUR OWN ◇ ➤

○ PART 1 | ○ PART 2 | ○ PART 3

↳ You were put in a Maze all on your own, with nothing but your dog. The isolation is one thing, but what'll happen when you finally escape?

○ SOLIDARITY ◇

↳ Minho is used to being the tough guy; but he doesn't know how to react when he meets someone tougher than him.

○ LIFE BEFORE DROWNING ◇

↳ You're from one of the many alternative Mazes - and yours happened to be full of water. Though, you only realise how weird your Maze was when you reach the Safe Haven, and meet a certain Runner, who feels weirdly familiar.

○ SAVIOR COMPLEX ◇

↳ You're a new Runner, and a disobedient one. So, when you get stung, Minho is left to play saviour. And doctor. Though, as he looks after you, he starts to think you might not be so bad.

○ IN ADVANCE OF GREIF ◇

↳ Getting bitten by a crank is never fun. But, you're from a Maze, so, you'll be fine... right?

□ EXPOSURE ◇

↳ In an attempt to comfort Chuck, you confess an embarrassing secret about something you did back when you were crushing on Minho and before you started dating. Unfortunately, your boyfriend isn't as heavy of a sleeper as you originally thought.

Contains mild suggestive content and spice.

□ SPARKS ◇

↳ Now in the Safe Haven, the sexual tension between you and Minho has turned into a twisted game of restraint. Though, it's hard not to break when you finally catch a glimpse of Minho's lightning scars.

Contains suggestive themes and spice.

□ BEST FEATURE ☆

↳ You can't stop staring at Minho's arms.

Contains suggestive content and spice.

• INDOCTRINATION ☆

↳ The first time you ever met Minho in the WICKED facility, and the corrupt childhood you briefly spent together before things take a wrong turn.

#🌿 petri's masterlist #tmr fanfiction #tmr imagines #tmr minho #minho the maze runner #minho tmr #minho maze runner #minho tmr x reader #the maze runner

2K notes · View notes

lavenderlyncis · 1 year ago

Text

Join me in reviewing Olivia Rodrigo's album GUTS. I've waited years for this!!

all-american bitch - 9/10, big fan. I love it when she screams because the world is unfair. same girl, same

bad idea right? - 10/10. I know this one is controversial but I LOVE her more punky songs, I think that's when she's best

vampire - 10/10. I'm not always a fan of piano ballads, but the bridge and outro really make it for me. The hurt turning into anger and despair is just so cathartic. And the video is one of my faves of all time

lacy - 1000/10. What the hell. Did not expect to feel this much emotion from that title. Uhhh... yeah, same. I super relate to that. Whether or not lacy is supposed to be a real person or a manifestation of the beauty standard, this hits. Also, idk if I'm making this up but I dig the romantic undertones, they sell it

ballad of a homeschooled girl - "I made it weird, I made it worse"/10. OLIVIA HOW DID YOU KNOW that I lie awake thinking about all the weird things I did and said, Olivia, did you write this for me specifically??? Every day I am alive IS social suicide. I'm sorry, this is my song, actually. "Can't think of a third line", she's so real

making the bed - "I'm playing the victim so well in my head"/10. How. Does. She. Do. It? I could write an entire essay about this song. Maybe THIS is my song?? She's so good at saying exactly how I feel. I already know that this song will play a million times on my phone. Also I love the drivers license references. Big fan of the making the bed metaphor

logical - 9/10. favourite crime vibes. She's good with these songs about bad relationships. Used to be my favourite thing she did, but now I'm more invested in the songs that are about her/other experiences. That being said this song is really fucking good. This is the Olivia I fell in love with and she's still amazing at doing piano ballads

get him back! - 9/10. Olivia having ANOTHER song with speak-singing where she wants to get back with her ex?? Yes, PLEASE. Bad idea right 2.0. Fucking obsessed

love is embarrassing - 10/10. I said it before I'll say it again, angry Olivia is the best. And she's right, love IS embarrassing as hell

the grudges - 10/10. She does the paino ballads SO WELL. I think this is my favourite one on here. Because, wow, yeah, that is how it is

pretty isn't pretty - i can't rate this/10. GOD, I love it when she talks about insecurities. And don't think I don't see that skipping lunch line. It's sp hard to articulate how this song makes me feel. Especially since I've been low key comparing myself to her, even though we have entirely different bodies and faces. It's nice to know she also struggles with this. And she's right, you could do literally anything to change your appearance and you'd still be unhappy

teenage dream - 100000/10. "Is it recording? Of course it is.", the way I gasped. Okay, I love the interpretation of it ending with a child to be about growing up and childhood innocence. But the line she says?? Especially combined with the meaning of the song it feels a lot like it's about taking away youth by recording it and putting it out there just like she was supposed to be everyone's teenage dream as a child actor and young musician. This feels so personal to her while also being relatable to others. I'm 19 too, Olivia and I are born in the same year. And this is exactly how I feel about growing up. I hope it gets better, my teenage years were crap, I'm tired of being young, but it's also the only thing I can hold onto. I'm honestly terrified of turning 20. But hey, Olivia did it, so... it'll get better, right?

#i should probably stop trying to give songs numbers #they're all perfect to me #or2 #olivia rodrigo #guts olivia rodrigo #or

597 notes · View notes

virgosimagination · 2 years ago

Text

States: What They Are and How to Use Them

A state, also known as a state of consciousness, is an identity. When you are in the state of the wish fulfilled, you are identifying and being the person who already has your desire(s).

For example, say you're manifesting a specific person, more popularly referred to as an SP. You are currently identifying as someone who is single. As someone who wants your SP but doesn't have them. In order to manifest them, you need to identify as someone who is taken; someone who is in a relationship with your SP.

You are I Am: pure consciousness. You are currently embodying a state, and you can just as easily embody a new one. You are not your state, and you can move between states with perfect ease.

For ease, we often refer to the state that we desire to occupy--the state where we already have our desire--as the State of the Wish Fulfilled.

No matter what you are manifesting, your goal is to make the State of the Wish Fulfilled your dwelling state. You do this by going back to the State of the Wish Fulfilled more than you go back to the state where you do not have your desire. An encompassing term for this is the State of Lack.

How do you enter a state?

By intention. The second you want to enter a state, you do just that. However, if you're new to applying states, this might be a confusing concept to you. It can be hard to trust the fact that you actually shifted states, even though you did. If this is how you feel, you can say an affirmation that implies you entered the state. It can be as simple as "I am now in the State of the Wish Fulfilled."

Now you're in the State of the Wish Fulfilled. What happens if you go back to the State of Lack? How can you tell you fell out of the state?

A simple way to tell that you have fallen out of the State of the Wish Fulfilled is by your thoughts. Your thoughts come from your state, so if you are thinking thoughts that do not align with your desired state, then you have fallen out of it. These thoughts can be negative thoughts, doubts, worries, reactions to the 3D, et cetera. Reasonings is an encompassing term for this, which I discuss in <this> post.

All that is needed of you when you realize that you slipped from the State of the Wish Fulfilled, is to shift back to it. Say your affirmation again. "I am now in the State of the Wish Fulfilled." Problem solved; you are now back in the state.

It is important to monitor your thoughts, so that every time you enter the State of Lack, you can quickly re-enter the State of the Wish Fulfilled.

Make sure you shift back to the State of the Wish Fulfilled every time you notice that you have slipped out of it. By doing this, you will make the State of the Wish Fulfilled your dwelling state. Once the State of the Wish Fulfilled is your dwelling state, your desire will manifest into your 3D reality.

Persist until this happens. That is all you need to do.

#law of assumption #loa manifestation #loa advice #loa #loassumption #master manifestor #manifesation #manifesting #manifest #states #neville goddard

2K notes · View notes

piningpercussionist · 7 months ago

Note

hey hi uh would you be able to check if y'all have The Land Before Time IV back in stock yet?

Sure thing- one moment.

*Kim turns to the monitor and pulls the keyboard a little closer to herself before she starts typing away. After a minute, she slides it back to it's original spot and turns back to the customer.*

It looks like we do, yeah. It should be in our Kids and Family section- let me know if you need help finding it.

#pine.txt #asks #anon #rp #kim pine #sp comic #spvtwtg #spto #spvtw #not in standard continuity #(ooc: not changing my answer but i DID just realize i totally could have answered this like it was from the time it was still missing...)#(ooc: could have been funny maybe idk. and now neither will any of you /j)#ooc: i need everyone to know that i just made an insanely intense effort to see if there was a canon section of no-account that i could use #+here.#ooc: i did not. literally the only labeled bin in the comics is ''canadian🍁“ and there are a couple of signs in spto i couldn't make out +#+but the ones i could (which was most of them) didn't seem applicable #ooc: so i am. giving them a kids & family section. or bin- at least #((ooc: some of the spto section/bin names: anime- science saru- directors- discount [10%? memory bad]- action- romance))#((ooc: there are more but. again. memory bad. and also they weren't what i was looking for so i wasn't trying to remember tbh))#((ooc: i used the references we were given that i have in my official art tag and also went frame by frame through a clip of the #((ooc: fuck i hit enter. l. Anyway i was going through an unfinished clip of rocie and ramona's fight. and also all the kim clips that take #+ place there.))#ooc: also! just a fun little thought i wanted to throw out there. if any scotts wanted to rp what that movie return might bave looked like+#+that could be funny lol #roxie*** and ramona fight #HAVE*** looked like. ugh

3 notes · View notes

eddiemunsonsmum · 1 month ago

Text

Bubble Therapy - Eddie Munson

Eddie Munson x Original Female Character

Summary: Eddie is filthy and now that he's home from the hospital he no longer has an excuse to stay that way. Also, Eddie has never had a bubble bath before :(

Tags: Fluff, Love, Joking, Banter, Angst, Spicy references, Small amount of Spice, inner healing/healing Eddie's inner child, Mommy!kink/Mommy!Dom if you squint, Basically Eddie has Mommy issues.. and Daddy issues.

TWs: past child abuse, past child neglect, drug references

Words: 5.2k

A/N: This story sits canonically after, Aftermath and before Drop Out but should be able to be read as a standalone. More notes at the end.

Eddie was sulking.

Karmen could tell as she popped her head around the corner of the bedroom door and looked in on him curled up on his side of the bed. Above the covers as she had instructed. The sour look on his face as he glowered at the wall made her feel a little sorry for him but more than anything, it made her want to laugh.

He was being juvenile.

“Alright, I’m ready for you.” She called, catching his attention as cross eyes flicked towards her and then back to the wall. As if to check if she had been speaking to him. As if they weren’t alone in her house on a random Thursday night.

As if she hadn’t said she was walking away to get things ready for his bath.

“Do I have to?” He asked rhetorically, sullen face pressing his lips together as she answered simply that yes, he did.

He had been home from the hospital for a week now after his ordeal in The Upside Down or as Karmen knew it, the car accident.

He was currently staying with her in her home. Having freaked out when he’d returned to the trailer. She and Wayne hadn’t managed to get him to sleep there more than one night and she wasn’t really sure how much of that he had actually spent sleeping.

She understood. He hadn’t been back there that she knew of, since he’d seen a girl murdered right in front of his eyes in the living room he’d grown up in.

She didn’t want him to have to stay there if he didn’t want to. She was more than happy to house him. She just had one, simple condition.

That he washed at least once a week.

Wayne had helped him into the shower when he’d returned to the trailer and he’d sat in the bottom of it like a petulant child as Karmen scrubbed him top to bottom. Albeit gently as he was still healing. It was his first proper wash since he’d woken up alive in the alternative version of the trailer park. Half eaten and covered in blood.

He’d been cleaned up somewhat before he was rushed to surgery back in the real world and he had been sponge bathed during his hospital stay. But nothing had quite compared to the feeling of washing away weeks worth of grime that he hadn’t even realized was still hiding on his body.

That being said, he wasn’t keen to do it again.

It had taken a lot out of him and while he was getting better at moving around on his own, he was still very sore and sorry. He was shaky on his feet and the feeling of the water hitting his skin in the shower had quickly grown overstimulating. Making him want to scream but instead all he could do was silently cry as Karmen apologized over and over for making him do it.

He’d found his words again shortly after returning to Karmen’s house. Having been effectively mute for the majority of his hospital stay. He hadn’t been able to talk, to tell her everything that was happening with him. His brain had been blocking his ability to speak in the way it used to when he was a child.

Nonverbal.

They had called it. He was nonverbal during his hospital stay. But after getting to come back to a familiar place that hadn’t been tainted by a horrific tragedy that he was reminded of everywhere he looked. The block in his brain had started to fall away. To dissolve and reabsorb itself as words that he couldn’t form days earlier fell from his lips with ease. Small at first, one word answers until this point in time where he was again, much to everyone’s relief, speaking full sentences.

Although he was still keeping things close to his chest. He could talk and that was what mattered to his loved ones in the moment.

The only downside being that a verbal Eddie was an argumentative one.

He wasn’t afraid to say he didn’t want to do something and when Karmen had brought up how dirty he’d gotten just lying around the house during the week he had immediately felt defensive and made a snippy remark about how that reflected her housekeeping skills more than his personal hygiene.

He’d regretted it instantly. Seeing anger flash in her eyes and watching as her jaw set together hard. A frustrated exhale through flared nostrils prompted him to apologize quickly and profusely as she told him she was going to organize a bath and made him promise to not get under the covers in her bed while his feet were so disgusting.

She’d calmed down in the time it took her to organize his bath. She knew he didn’t mean it and if he’d been in his right mind he never would have said it even if it was something he thought on the inside. Which, considering the state of his own bedroom, she highly doubted.

Either that or he was the world’s biggest hypocrite and she wouldn’t hesitate to point that out if he doubled down.

She knew he was defensive because he hadn’t enjoyed his shower at the trailer and he was dreading going through that again. His anger was reactive and while that didn’t excuse it in general, she gave him a pass in this particular instance and put her energy into making this a nice experience for him so that hopefully he wouldn’t fight her so hard on getting clean in the future.

Karmen nodded at him again when he didn’t respond to her answer. Walking into the room to stand next to the bed and waiting with thin patience for him to move.

“Ugh.” He groaned, pushing himself up into a sitting position. Something he’d still been struggling with a week earlier. “Okay.” He moaned, unable to keep the reluctancy from his tone as Karmen held out a hand to help him up.

“Bring your cane, we’re going to the main bathroom.” She reminded him, picking up the cheap walking stick she’d bought from Melvald’s the day after he’d returned home and placing it in his other hand.

Eddie had grumbled about using it. But conceded after it had saved him from fall that maybe it was best.

He still hated it. But he was aware that it was temporary and that there were people out there who weren't so lucky as to be able to put their cane down after a couple of weeks. He tried his best to be grateful knowing it would end eventually.

“What?” He asked, more of a whine than a word. “Why not in here?” He complained, nodding towards the ensuite and watching as she cocked her head at the question.

“I don’t have a bath in there.” She answered plainly, as if it was an obvious answer.

“A bath?” Eddie asked with a scowl.

Oh no.

He already didn’t want to shower but an actual bath was worse somehow.

“Yeah.” She replied, jerking her head towards the doorway of the bedroom. “I told you I was going to run you a bath.” She said tiredly, shaking her head at the way he muttered to himself.

“I thought it was a figure of speech.” He admitted quietly.

“Well what did you think I was doing that whole time?” She asked incredulously, shrugging at him as he mimicked her, shrugging his shoulders back.

“I don’t know…” He replied earnestly. “Toilet.”

“I was gone for like twenty minutes!” Karmen exclaimed, offended. “The water pressure here is shit by the way.” She added with a snicker.

“Not an unusual amount of time for you.” Eddie smirked as her mouth fell open in disbelief.

“Stop sassing me.” She warned him. She had let the first remark go. But commenting on her toilet breaks was too far. Even her boss let it go when she made it back to her desk after twenty minutes of reading Garfield… And he was paying her!

“I tried to do a nice thing for you. Come on, it’s all ready for you.” She said, shaking the hand she held out for him to take.

“I appreciate it but…” He began, trailing off as she gave him a pointed look and he decided it was better for him if he just started getting up instead of arguing.

He could argue about it on the way to the bathroom.

“It’ll get cold while you sit here whining.” She cautioned as he placed his hand in hers.

“Wouldn’t want that.” Eddie replied wryly, rolling his eyes.

“No you wouldn’t.” She agreed, knowing he was being cheeky and choosing to ignore it because he was agreeing with her point of view.

“Oh why, are there lots of bubbles?” He asked sarcastically as he grunted through the pain of standing, using her hand and his cane to steady himself.

“Of course.” Karmen answered with a laugh as she turned towards the bathroom and tried to pull him behind her. The heavy weight of Eddie not moving forced her to halt.

“What?” She asked, turning to face him. Baffled to find him frowning.

“No, nothing.” He replied quickly, shaking his head and limping closer as Karmen cocked a brow in his direction.

“No, what? What’s wrong?” She asked gently, placing a hand on the uninjured side of his chest and ducking into his view as he shrugged at her.

“Nothings wrong I just… I’ve never had a bath with bubbles before.” He answered simply. Staring into disbelieving eyes as she blinked at him dumbly.

“You’ve never had a bubble bath?” She asked after a moment of surprised silence. More of a shocked statement than a question.

“Nope.” He replied simply.

“Like, not even as a kid?” She asked, stunned, as he shrugged again.

“My parents couldn’t afford fancy shit like that and playing with me in the bath wasn’t exactly Wayne’s brand of parenting.” He chuckled. “Thank God.” He added under his breath, making her huff out a laugh.

“Oh my God…” She said empathetically. “Well what are you waiting for then, come on?” She encouraged, tugging on his hand as she turned back towards the bathroom.

He followed behind her quietly. The soft drag of his foot and the dull thud of his cane against the hardwood announcing his injured gate as he limped along behind her at a pace that he felt she must find infuriating in her healthy state.

They made it to the bathroom eventually.

Eddie’s brows shot towards his hairline as Karmen nudged the door open and steam began to seep out from inside.

“Quick.” She instructed him hopefully. Knowing full well that he couldn’t actually move very fast but he could at least pretend to try.

He did pretend to try. Grunting as he shuffled past her into the small room at the same pace as he was moving before but taking smaller steps so it seemed like he was moving faster.

She smiled to herself, pulling the door closed behind them to trap the heat and gesturing for him to keep moving so they both had room in there.

She couldn’t see his face but she knew he was smiling. The tone of his voice gave it away as he whispered a small:

“Wow.”

“You like?” She asked, as she began to scoop her hair into her hands before pulling it up to the top of her head and securing it in a loose bun with the scrunchy on her wrist.

She was already starting to sweat in the small space and needed her hair off her neck immediately.

“Yeah.” Eddie answered simply, emotion in his voice as he turned to her with watery eyes. “I like.” He added with a pout as she smiled up at him, feeling satisfied.

“Good.” She said as he turned back to the bath. The water was as high as she could justify letting it go without knowing it would for sure spill over the sides when Eddie got in. The bubbles were piled high atop the surface, coming up at least seven inches above the rim on the tub and fizzing away in the silence of the small space.

The aroma in the room was delicious. She’d used some of her favorite bath oils. Christmas gifts from her lazy brothers that were actually thoughtful gifts from her Mother. She’d mixed them with the muscle relaxing salts she’d bought from the pharmacy and the children’s bubble bath she had on hand for when she babysat. She’d spent a lot of time on her knees, fluffing up the water to make sure the bubble bath had worked as intended, if not better than.

The light was still on in the small room but she’d lit candles that rested on the sink and the windowsill. The little lights flickered around and threatened to extinguish under the change of air pressure from them both entering. They were adding to the yummy smell in the room.

Eddie squinted to read the name of the one closest to him.

Confetti Cupcake.

No wonder it smelled so damn good. He wasn’t a stranger to a good cupcake.

Karmen leaned down and gently removed his cane from his hand. Making sure he was steady before leaning it up against the side of the shower just a foot away from where he would be sitting in the bath.

She knew Eddie was grateful that he wouldn’t have to use it forever but he relied heavily on it for now. She wanted to make sure it was easily within reach for him at all times.

“Now, let’s get you undressed Honey.” She said softly, not missing the shiver that ran down his spine at the words. The tender way she’d spoken them awakening something inside of him briefly before he pushed it back down and leant against the sink to brace himself against being knocked over as she squished around him so she was facing his front.

“You like that?” She asked knowingly as she reached for the hem of his shirt. His tongue darted out to lick at his lips as he averted his eyes. Nodding at the question as she smiled to herself at his response.

Eddie wasn’t sure exactly what about it he liked. Just that he knew he most certainly did like it when she spoke to him like that.

Like she wanted to help him.

Like she cared and helping him wasn’t just a chore she had to get through so she could go and do whatever she actually wanted to be doing.

Like he wasn’t a chore.

More than that. Like she enjoyed taking care of him and he was the something that she wanted to be doing.

“You know I’ll take care of you for as long as you need me to Sweetheart.” She said as she began to lift the hem of his shirt. Pulling it up towards his chest as he hummed in reply, not trusting his voice.

What if I need you to take care of me forever?

Eddie wanted to ask as he lifted his arms as high as he could. The muscles strained as he forced them up further than he had lately in an effort to be helpful.

“What if I just want you to take care of me?” He asked instead, as the fabric of his shirt brushed against his lips and he bent forward to help her pull it over his head. Grateful for the fact that she couldn’t see his face as he felt heat rise up his neck at the query.

“For as long as you want me to, then.” Karmen answered simply, shimmying the shirt over his unruly mess of hair and finally freeing him of his cotton prison. “Pants off next.” She added, as he straightened himself. Peeking through the curls that still covered his face and watching as she tossed his shirt towards the hamper.

Eddie reached for his waistband, hands making it there before hers could and pausing on the elastic as she placed her own on top of his and looked up at him to see what he was thinking.

He looked down at her sheepishly through the gap in his hair and she chuckled to herself. Raking her fingers through it and brushing it out of his face and back behind his shoulders.

“You’re wearing sweatpants.” She reminded him gently, making him frown as she leveled him with her questioning gaze. “You’re not hiding anything by keeping them on.” She explained, eyes flicking away from his and towards the obvious tent at his crotch that was just a hair shy of brushing against her belly button.

“I am, actually.” He responded, eyes following hers to the elephant in the room and watching as it twitched in response to being spoken of. The fabric covering the tip slowly discoloring as his wetness seeped into it on the upward kick.

“Oh, nevermind.” He murmured, hooking his thumbs under the waistband and lifting it out and over his erection before loosening his grip on the pants altogether and letting them fall from his fingers to his ankles.

“You really liked that huh?” Karmen asked slyly, her voice sultry as she spoke. A satisfied smirk crossed her lips as she watched his cock jerk at the question. A bead of pre-cum dripping down his head and falling to the floor to further soil his sweats.

Eddie didn’t answer, flustered by the teasing. He hadn’t been expecting anything like that from her when he’d walked into the bathroom and still wasn’t to be honest. But he couldn’t help the way his body reacted to the way she spoke. When she knew exactly what she was doing to him and lowered her voice to a raspy octave that tickled something inside his abdomen.

When she whispered about loving to take care of him and how easy he was to love.

It drove him insane and she knew it.

Thankfully she stopped there, holding out her arms and placing firm hands on either side of his torso. She encouraged him to use them to steady himself as he stepped out of his pants.

He did so with little grace. Wobbling around as he balanced on each leg and used the souls of his feet to push the fabric down and off his ankles until finally he was free and completely naked.

Almost ready for the bath.

“Bend down for me please.” Karmen instructed, leaning over to grab something off the sink and holding it up to show him.

Eddie nodded, tilting his head forward and closing his eyes as she raked her fingers through his hair again and pulled it into a bun similar to her own on the top of his head.

He stood back up when she let him know she was done, turning to look in the mirror and seeing the foggy outline of his ridiculous hairdo.

Large messy bun atop his scalp that was still a little too far back for his bangs to be pulled into. His forehead still covered by them.

He snorted at the stylish do.

“Here.” Kam nudged him to get his attention again, holding up the simple piece of elastic fabric that she used to keep her hair out of her eyes when she did her make up and handing it to him to put over his head as she turned her attention back to the bath.

Eddie pulled it down over his eyes and let it sit around his neck for now while Karmen moved to the side to give him room to head towards the bath.

He took a shaky step, holding onto the sink on one side and Karmen’s arm on the other as he lifted his leg over the side of the tub. Hissing as his foot parted the bubbles and he placed it into the warm water.

“Careful.” Karmen said absently as he lifted the other leg experimentally. He knew to be careful. Of course he was being careful. He was doing everything in his power to avoid getting hurt and being forced to go back to that wretched place he’d finally escaped earlier in the month.

Eddie heeded her warning anyway. Taking an extra few seconds to prepare himself before lifting his other leg into the water and slowly sinking down. Holding tight onto Karmen’s arms as he lowered himself until he was sitting firm against the bottom of the tub. His iron grip loosening on her as he stretched out his legs and grimaced apologetically at how hard he had been holding on to her.

She waved him off, even though she knew she’d have at least one bruise. She chose this for him and wasn’t about to hold that against him when he was just trying to steady himself.

“Lie back.” She said as she pressed a hand on his chest and encouraged him to lean against the wall. His body slipped slightly and made him jolt in alarm before he caught himself and let out a sharp exhale of relief. His back touching against cool tile as wet hands pulled the fabric from around his neck up and over his bangs.

It held them out of his eyes brilliantly and took away frustration he hadn't realized he’d been feeling when he could suddenly see properly and nothing was touching his face or neck.

Karmen produced a stool to sit on. He wasn’t entirely sure where from but he had a hunch she’d stored it in the shower. It was the one she sat on when she babysat her friend’s child Jack who was still too little to take baths on his own.

He was surprised when she’d told him what it was for when he’d originally asked almost a year ago now. Jack was three at the time, nearly four currently and she still sat with him while he bathed.

Eddie couldn’t remember a time when someone had sat with him in the bath as a child. Maybe they had when he was really young and he just couldn’t remember it. But what he did remember was from when he was around the age Jack was now. So he didn’t have much hope for that being true.

He remembered playing until the boring water went cold and then calling out for someone to help him. He remembered the way he shivered as he waited for someone to come. Eventually finding his own way out, not without incident and being chastised for getting water on the floor. For slipping in it. For being hurt and more importantly, for moving.

Because he was supposed to be stuck.

He hadn’t understood that as a child. But as an adult he knew it meant that he was left there on purpose. Because they knew where he was when he was in the bath. They knew he was playing by himself and couldn’t just walk in on them doing whatever it was they wanted to do while he was stuck in the tiny room by himself, wishing someone would come and sit with him.

“What if you’d drowned?” Wayne had asked him once when he was a lot older. Disbelief on his face as the topic of how the hell his parents had managed to keep their shady dealings from him for long had arisen and Eddie had explained one of the ways he’d remembered.

Eddie had just shrugged in response.

He guessed they didn’t care…

He looked up at Karmen as she sat down on the stool, rummaging around in the drawers beside her and he couldn’t help but wonder if this is what it would have been like if he’d had a Mom that wanted to do bathtime with him as a child.

Minus the raging erection of course.

But even that had begun to relax the second it hit the water. Tension he didn’t know he had been holding onto seeping from deep in his bones as he followed Karmen’s lead and let himself rest against the wall.

“Here we go.” Karmen said cheerfully as she shut the drawer and held up a clean hand towel and an empty plastic cup. She placed the cup on the edge of the bath and caught Eddie by surprise as she dipped the towel into the water.

“What’s that for?” He asked as she lifted it out. Letting it slide along his body as she pulled it up and over his torso like a small blanket.

“To keep you warm.” She explained. “Also dicks float and it’s unsettling.” She added, making him laugh.

“Mm.” He agreed, looking down at the scratchy cloth that now covered his modesty and most of his scars as she scooped up some water in the cup and poured it over the towel to keep it from going cold.

Eddie shuddered as the warmth spread over his chest. The water brushing against his skin and relaxing his tense muscles.

He huffed out an involuntary sigh. The sound made Karmen smile as she continued to scoop and pour water over his torso ever now and then and he let his eyes flutter closed. The bubbles fizzed around his body. Tingling against his goosebumpy skin and adding to the experience in a way he hadn’t anticipated.

He’d always looked at bubble baths through the eyes of an excited child rather than the weary eyes of an adult with aching joints.

“This is nice.” He mumbled, lips barely moving, eyes still shut as he fought the sudden overwhelming urge to sleep. To let himself fall into unconsciousness in his watery bed and float into nice dreams in a way he hadn’t since before everything had gone down.

“I’m glad Baby.” Kam murmured back, her volume low on purpose to keep in line with the calmness of the room.

Eddie’s cock twitched in response to the term of endearment.

Lord she did know exactly how to work him up but he couldn’t tell if she was doing it on purpose now or not. They both ignored his twitching erection. Eddie, willing it away as Karmen, smiled to herself at his eagerness starting to die down again.

While an orgasm was never unwelcome when it happened upon him, he was far too relaxed to be bothered with trying to procure one at that moment.

Maybe after his bath when they returned to the bedroom and Karmen finally let him under the covers again. But right now he was relishing in her attention of a different kind. Being nurtured by her in a way that healed something long broken inside of him. Something he hadn’t even realized had been damaged when he was small.

It was nice.

To feel cared for.

Not just to feel cared for but to feel worthy of being cared for. Not just looked after as a means of keeping him alive but nourished and allowed to grow in a way he should have decades earlier.

He hadn’t realized what he had been missing all this time. A part of that was hugely depressing. Something he struggled with a lot since he’d met her. Realizing what it truly felt like to be loved and the epiphany that he’d never felt it before.

Not truly.

Wayne loved him. He knew he did. But not in the way Karmen did. Which, he supposed, would be yucky and illegal.

Regardless of the fact that there was a silent agreement in place that Eddie did not consider Alan to be his Father anymore. That Wayne was his Dad through and through. He wasn’t biologically Wayne’s child and he knew deep down that there would always be this disconnect between what the love of a Father should be and the love Wayne felt for him.

That being said, the love of a Father was something Alan was supposed to feel for him unconditionally and he didn't. There was a disconnect there too and Wayne had meant to use it to explain how much he loved Eddie. To point out that if Alan didn’t love him in the way he was supposed to, that there was this dissonance that wasn’t supposed to be there, as if Eddie wasn’t his son; then Eddie’s own logic was flawed and Wayne himself could love Eddie as much as he could his own son.

He had really only succeeded in pointing out to Eddie that Alan was one of the two people in the world that were supposed to love him wholly and unconditionally and he didn’t.

Wayne had accidently pointed out that Eddie was fundamentally unlovable.

Even to his parents.

The realization had hurt him deeply. Wounded him worse than he cared to admit.

He had believed whole-heartedly until he met Karmen. Until he’d chanced upon someone that had taken the time to show him what being loved actually felt like.

Now he didn’t just struggle to feel like he was worth loving but also to comprehend that she thought he was as well. That she wanted to spend her time with him and it wasn’t simply out of obligation that she did so.

That she went out of her way to spend time with him and on him in ways no one ever had before.

She was for all intents and purposes the only person that ever truly loved him and he was so grateful for every second of her attention that he was allowed to have and savor. Every small drip of her affection that he could squeeze from her until she decided that it was enough.

That he was too much and she was done.

Eddie opened his eyes abruptly. Shocking his brain into forgetting his train of thought by forcing himself to take in his surroundings without warning it first. A trick he’d learnt when he was younger and plagued by persistent nightmares.

It didn’t work so well for nightmares now. He couldn’t wake himself anymore like he used to be able to when he was a kid. But it still helped to dispel the negative thoughts in a moment when he shouldn't be or perhaps couldn’t afford to be thinking them.

“You okay?” Karmen asked from her place beside the bath. At some point she had stopped consistently scooping water onto his torso and sat back on her seat to watch him relax and wait for him to ask to get out. She had thought he was asleep and was about to take away the whole hand towel and rewarm it in the water when his eyes had shot open and he had stared at the end of the bath for a long moment without speaking.

He’d startled her but she didn’t show it. She wondered what he had been thinking about.

Eddie nodded without looking up at her. Her hands moving into his view as she peeled the wet cloth down from his chest and dunked it in the water by his side before replacing it. The heat of the towel against his chest calmed his racing heart as he exhaled a slow breath and let his eyes flutter closed again.

Yeah.

He was okay.

More Notes: I don't mean to make Eddie seem childlike. He is struggling with trying to understand what it means to be loved and that brings up a lot of feelings about the things he should have had in his childhood and in a way, how he is realizing her can still experience them now for the first time as an adult and with work, be okay with that. Because he can't go back and change how he grew up or make his parents love him. So he will settle for experiencing these things at all. Even if it means they are filtered through an adult lens that he wouldn't have liked or wanted to be there when he was a kid. I hope that makes sense.

Read the rest of the series here :)

This series is so personal to me, so it means the world to me when someone let’s me know they enjoy a work from this series. If you guys liked this please pleaseee consider letting me know via comment, reblog, message, anon ask etc.

Tags: @3ddi3-daydreamer @micheledawn1975 @munson-blurbs @wheels-of-despair @browneyes528 @stevemunsons

79 notes · View notes