#source: Batman: No Man’s Land

[bonesbitchesboutcomicbooks]

Barbara “most gorgeous woman alive” Gordon

detective comics #739 /// Batman: legends of the dark knight #125

[blackbirdsblackberries]

I Hate The New Hero!

Pt 5: What?!

Finally getting home from your patrol you sneak through the window of your bedroom and collapse onto your bed. After the call you decided that your patrol was done.

Frankly you're still coming to terms with the fact that Batman and his protogese are the same people who are essentially praying on your civilian self's downfall yet adoring your vigilante persona like it's the greatest thing in the world.

Though, now that you really think about it, it makes sense. Bruce Wayne is the richest man alive, he'd be able to afford to do this, they have the same amount of members as the heroes, same builds and heights, actually... Basically everything matches up.

Not to mention the fact that your senses goes off around both group members!

From outside your small room door you hear your parents arguing again - more like your mother yelling and your dad breaking things and stomping his foot. It was probably your dad's fault again. Don't get you wrong, you love your family! It's just that they're dysfunctional.

Your dad has a massive drinking problem that landed him working as a goon for Black Mask, he's struggled with his temper for years after he got hit a bit too hard in the head by Batman. Pair that with the fact that he's mute and he's a force to be reckoned with.

Your mom is always busy and rarely ever home, when she is she couldn't be bothered to interact with you unless you got into trouble. She grew up rich, often talking about how she went to the same school as Bruce Wayne and how she was a popular cheerleader before her life fell apart. She doesn't talk much on the topic but it's clear she holds distain for your father and, by extension, you.

You sigh to yourself, you need to shower. That means you need to get past them without them bringing you into it. Or you just don't shower for the night and have one tomorrow...

Your mom screams something out about not throwing knives and you decide to just shower tomorrow morning.

You change out of your costume and hide it safely under a loose floorboard, you change into your pajamas and get into bed. Today was a massive mental drain and physical drain.

...

You awake to a knock at the front door. Your parents usually ignore it and make you answer when someone knocks because "you're dispensable" as they say. Looking at the clock on the wall of the kitchen you see it's around 7am.

Groggily making your way to the door you look through the peep hole and see Tim standing awkwardly on the other side with a guy next to him, the guy next to him being so big and tall that you could only see a small part of his chest and arm.

You curse to yourself quietly, this is by far the worst luck you've ever had.

You open the door and look at the two. Now seeing the other guy the thing that stands out is a stripe of white hair on his head. Instantly you know it's Jason Todd.

You aren't an idiot. He's the only one in the family built like how he is - not including Bruce.

"What do you want?" You ask, annoyed. Tim chuckles weakly, as if nervous. "Wayne Enterprises wishes to give your mother her letter of departure." You blink once, then twice. "Huh? Letter of departure? The fuck does that mean?" You mutter, genuinely confused.

Jason scoffs, "it means your dear mother is losing her job, kid." He states uncaring of how blunt he's being. Tim elbows him and hisses something about being more considerate.

You don't listen, all noise becoming white noise. Why is she being fired? She works hard, she dedicates her time, she does her best! Is this because you have beef with Tim? That's not fair!

She's the only stable source of income, without that job you all would be living on the streets. You've heard AND seen so many horror stories about teens living on the streets, it's something you'd pray never happened to you. But now it's entirely probable.

So, in a moment of desperation you grip Tim by his shoulders "Please! You can't fire her! We'll end up homeless! She works all the time, she tries! My mother will improve if you ask, she needs this job. The whole family does!"

Tim seems shocked by this, his posture stiffening. Jason looks on guard, as if assessing whether he should step in, though he doesn't seem fond of the idea. You wouldn't doubt that he was made to accompany Tim as a body guard.

Tim opens his mouth, then closes it, then opens it again. Clearly he wasn't expecting you to beg for your mother to keep her job.

"Uh... Look, I don't mean any harm by it, it's just that we need to make way for brighter minds..." He stumbles slightly over his words as if making the excuse up on the spot.

You won't back down however. "Tim, please, I desperately need you to realize this. I. Will. Die. On. The. Streets." Probably not true because of your mutation but the fear remains. "Please, I'll do anything for you to not do this! I already promised Bruce to stop talking bad about Aranea!" You please desperately.

Tim glances to Jason who quirks a brow and shrugs. The sound of movement from behind you makes your eyes widen and behind you you see your dad approaching, you were probably too loud.

He glares at you before yanking your hair so you move away from Tim and remove your clutches on him. You hiss in pain at the feeling but bow your head down.

Your dad eyes the two boys before looking to the paper in Tim's hands. He instantly knows what's going on and storms down the hallways of the complex to do who-knows what. That scares you. Your dad is unpredictable.

After some silence Tim speaks up. "Are you okay? Your dad pulled your hair pretty tightly..." You look down, ashamed. You couldn't even bother putting your walls up and defending your pride. Your life is basically falling apart at the seams.

"... I'll do anything for you to not fire my mother..." You mutter meekly, a far cry from how you usually act, something Tim notices immediately. He sighs to himself, he debates the odds. Maybe if he doesn't fire (Reader)'s mother then they can be even. The feud can end, it was pointless on your part to begin with for hating someone so sweet and kind, then hating him who defends the innocent.

"Fine. Your mother can stay, but, it may not be permanent. I suggest she find elsewhere in the mean time." Tim states before walking off. Jason takes a second to stare at your relived form, the slight smile of disbelief and look of relief in your eyes. He then leaves with Tim.

You close the door to the apartment and sink to the floor. That was terrifying. You'll have find a way of telling your mother the news before she goes into work in two hours.

You're officially having the day off from school and patrol today.

[suzukiblu]

WIP guessing game: "Robin"

Superboy has existed for about six months at best (five months, two weeks, and six days, but who's creepily spying on their fellow heroes and vigilantes? not Tim, for sure) and was created in a lab full of extremely niche genetic experiments whose creators very rarely bothered making look human, which is probably why he has some weird ideas about certain social norms.

Tim assumes that's why the guy just decided to drop a very annoyed Catwoman on him out of nowhere, anyway.

"The fuck?" he says, though through his vocoder it comes out more like the incoherent screeching of the damned. That being, well, the whole purpose of the vocoder and all. Superboy grins down at him from the nighttime sky all bright and sunny and weirdly adorable, for being a lab-grown weapon and a guy who is technically capable of disassembling Tim down to his individual atoms with, like, a touch and about two seconds' worth of thought.

Not that Tim has been creepily spying on anyone or said anyone's Cadmus files, again.

Also Superboy might not even know he can do that yet, so it's really not a smart thing to mention right now.

"Hey, man!" Superboy greets cheerfully. "She was breaking into that big museum a couple blocks over, figured you'd care about that. As opposed to, like, breaking into some rich asshole with insurance's penthouse. Figured you would not have cared about that."

"The museum also has insurance, for the record," Selina informs him sourly as she makes an art of getting off her unceremoniously roof-dumped ass while looking like being on this roof was her idea to begin with. Because, like: Selina. "And has not properly sourced the artifacts in their new Bast exhibit."

I know, that's why I was on my way to the museum to keep an eye out for you, is what Tim does not say, since Robin is supposed to be a splintered aspect of a mysterious all-knowing city spirit given human form and not just, like, a really dedicated teenager surviving on semi-legal energy drinks and conspiracy-board detective work and the occasional occult ritual to summon the Batman.

What he does do is jerkily cock his head and say, "Preyyyyy?", and let his vocoder horribly mangle the word into a sound usually best described as "unholy avian screeching". Superboy beams, which is not a normal reaction to hearing Robin's voice. Selina just rolls her eyes, but Selina of course knows about the whole "really dedicated teenager surviving on semi-legal energy drinks and conspiracy-board detective work and the occasional occult ritual to summon the Batman" thing.

Like she's never summoned the Batman for anything, geez. Or "Bruce", as an eight year-old Dick Grayson had once upon a time decided to randomly dub him. Tim still can't call the eternal and unsleeping eldritch protector of their city that without feeling like he's going to spontaneously combust, but it is in fact a thing that the Batman will answer to.

Might as well call Pennyworth "Alfie", though.

Jason was even worse at names than Dick, Tim is pretty sure.

"Yeah!" Superboy says, sounding still more cheerful and floating down the rest of the way to the roof to land lightly in front of Tim. Selina eyes him in a way that would end very badly for anyone who was not functionally invulnerable. "I mean, she seems cool and all but I dunno, figured the Bat wasn't big on Cats in his territory. And also the criming. Definitely also the criming."

"How . . . find Robin?" Tim asks. Superboy doesn't have enhanced senses, as far as he knows, so . . .

"Oh, I've been stalking you," Superboy explains. Tim blinks behind his unblinking mask and feels several ways about that statement. "That's what you Bats all do when you're interested in somebody, right? So I figured you'd like it if I did it back."

. . . Tim feels several ways about that statement.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Bruce Wayne is used to ransom calls. They happen often enough despite his children's training, though it doesn't help that they sometimes purposely get themselves captured to later mock the kidnappers but he digressed.

This call was different. "We have Tim Drakes children" what did that even mean? Did they kidnap some random infants with black wisps of hair and blue eyes and just hope that Tim miiight have had a night of indiscretion in the last year or so to be concerned about?

Spoiler was the first on scene, actively teasing Red Robin about the whole fiasco. He swears they couldn't possibly be his and this had to be a scam of some kind. They had been assessing the situation from the rafters of the warehouse when another guy who looked like prime Batman Adoption Bait stormed the place and beat the crap out of the guys before zooming over to the infants.

The pair nodded at eachother and leaped down from the rafters and landed behind the man. He whirled around, holding the kids protectively to his chest, careful to support thier heads.

They asked him to confirm if he's the father which he did so readily. Red Robin got a wierd feeling though and asked to get a swab for testing, just to be sure.

The guy refused. That wasn't overly suspicious but the defensive way he acted was. Were these not his children? The bats chose to try a different tactic and asked him to wait for the police to arrive so they could confirm he was the twins father.

He ran.

Danny was having one of the worst days of his afterlife, and trust him, he's had some rough days. Being chased through Gotham at night by its local terrifying vigilantes while trying not to drop or harm the babies was hard, especially since he was trying to hide his powers. But really, what was he supposed to do?

He can't exactly just say "a ghost with genie powers overheard my mom wish for grandbabies from me and granted that wish but screwed us by making the other half of the babies DNA that of some random rich guy from another reality?" Cause thats going to go over soooo well.

Why do they care so much anyway? He doubts they're going to make the guy pay child support, not that Danny needs it. Then again its probably better to stay in this world where no one knows who he is and his children are safer...from his parents OSHA violations if nothing else.

Vlad couldn't enter this universe cause he couldn't get past the "source wall" whatever that was, but Danny and his babies had no problems so meh.

The bats had him cornered and hiding invisibly inside an abandoned arcade (why were so many places in this city abandoned???) the bats kept combing through the place looking for him. He knew they were about ready to give up looking for him when one of the babies sneezed.

The next thing he knew the littlest bat, Robin was right next to him, "Found you." Then he was knocked out.

[goblinhoursinsomniaramblings]

I Know Those Eyes, Part 3

i said i was continuing this and i meant it. dramatic reveals and misunderstandings are like snacks for my anime kid soul, and i have desperately snacky urges today

***

Lex Luthor was a dangerous man.

Batman had known this for a very long time. It was likely the only other member of the Justice League to have known for as long was Superman himself. Yet, he had let his guard down.

And Damian had paid the price.

When had Luthor taken an interest in the Lazarus pits? How had he been able to locate a source of them without involving the League of Assassins? What, exactly, had he been trying to do? Batman had been willing to lay the matter to rest with Luthor and Damian–but now both of them were unearthed, and so would the questions he had hoped to never need to answer.

By every account, it was as though Lex had just divined the answer. Which was ridiculous. Until Batman took a harder look at the timeline of Lex’s ‘mental break’.

That base took time to construct. Time that roughly aligned with a couple of weeks before he began openly calling his own company’s name stupid and agitating for a change. It could have finished construction that very same day. And as soon as he had sequestered himself… Damian received the letter that sent him–

Batman breathed deeply, regaining his focus. He could not afford to get lost. Relevant details only.

So. Something had happened in that narrow window to point Luthor in the direction of Lazarus water and the Al Ghuls without tipping his hand.

He still had the files taken from Luthor’s systems in the wake of the incident. He combed through them now, arranging them onto a timeline. There, fifteen days before he went into isolation, a change between projects. One had been attempting to technologically replicate some forms of magic, which had stuttered out in failure. Immediately after… leylines?

That was… logical to follow, actually. Ambient magic supposedly flowed along leylines in the earth, like blood through veins in the body. Luthor must have been trying to tap into one to fuel his ‘arcanotech’ prototypes. There’s even a small device he claims he will use as a ‘thaumic tap’ to drain the magic like maple syrup from a tree.

All files cease after that. Something happened with that device. A tap for magic…

He remembered John Constantine complaining, incessantly, about the many ways magic could screw someone over. One of them was… where you got a lot of magic, causality stopped behaving quite the same.

Had Luthor seen the future?

The timing. The ability to evade the League of Assassins while harnessing enough Lazarus water to blow up a bunker. Whatever instructions had been in that letter to allow him to extract Damian from what had otherwise looked like an attempt to–

Relevant details only. The timing was too phenomenally close. The slightest misstep and Luthor and Damian would have been in their reach.

Luthor had had a vision to do whatever it was he had done.

The powers he had displayed could have been a side effect, but what if they were the point? What type of power did he channel with concentrated Lazarus water?

… he would need to consult Justice League Dark on this. But a horrifying new theory was taking shape.

Lex Luthor may have opened a door to one of the many lands of the dead.

And something may have given him power in exchange for doing so.

If Luthor had been dangerous before… he was a monster now.

***

Vlad glared out the window of the GAV, down at the frozen wasteland below, intense displeasure radiating out from the several layers of clothes he’d been forced to bundle himself in just to get this close. He had to stay in human form or risk getting frozen solid as a ghost.

“Y’know, glaring at it isn’t gonna suddenly make it any warmer, Mr. Super Delicate Fire Core,” said Danny, smirking, as he piloted.

“I swear they make it colder when I come here on purpose.”

“Frostbite is way more direct than that.”

“Yes. I remember.”

How could he forget barely managing to talk his way out of getting flung off the Far Frozen’s edge, when he’d helped Daniel get here four years ago? And they made it very clear that if he screwed it up, that was not just a threat, it was a standing offer.

That said… there was a term used, here in the Infinite Realms. The closest definition they had managed to find after four years was “family without condition”. Where one formed a family group that could shift their familial roles and dynamics for each other as needed, and thus were assumed to be needed. They had barely managed to reach that status the previous time around, but they had reached it. Like all of them were tuned to the same wavelength, and could adjust when the signal weakened somewhere.

In human terms, they were horrifically codependent in a way that could stop when they were apart, but pick right back up the second they got near each other. Luckily, ghosts and half-ghosts weren’t nearly so vulnerable to the psychological problems that a human would face. That codependence would cause anxiety and stress in a human.

For ghosts? Easy power-ups. Especially necessary at the time for Daniel, who not only hosted two weakened cores at the time, but was forming his own core simultaneously. Vlad had taken care not to provoke the people of the Far Frozen and threaten any of the three in their recovery.

He wouldn’t call his relationship with the yetis friendly, but he was at least recognized as kin to the Great One. And Vlad returned the favor by recognizing they would find a way to end him if he took advantage of Daniel or their kindness.

As the GAV finally landed, the door opened to an absolutely frigid wind that just made his badger snicker as he strolled off the vehicle, rings of light leaving him in his ice-immune ghost form. Still, Vlad followed, deeply unhappy.

Until the door to Frostbite’s home opened.

“Daddy!!!” came an excited squeal, and a small, black and white blur shot out to cling to him, instantly banishing the chill.

It was only barely an exaggeration–the little girl, roughly between three and four years of age, was his little princess Daniela. The joy and love they both felt on seeing each other gave him the boost to help protect his core from the ice of the Far Frozen. He reached up to hug her back, getting her to snuggle into his many layers of coat.

“Aw, nothing for mama?” asked Daniel, jokingly

“Mama’s not got puffy coats,” mumbled the small, glowing girl.

Daniel already had Dante in his arms, who was bolstering himself from Daniel’s quieter feelings in the same way Vlad had done. He’d likely never known the cold here to be truly cold. He had short sleeves, but didn’t even seem to notice, resting his head with his messy black hair against Daniel’s shoulder, blinking sleepily in the wind and cold.

Co-parenting with Daniel had been awkward at first, but they had agreed both had wanted to parent the children and give them the same chance they’d both gotten to live a new life from day one. Just. Better. So much better. No assassins, no neglect, no threats, no lies. And since it had been Vlad’s desperate decisions that gave the kids both their genetics, he had to concede that Daniel would have to be parentally involved. Daniel had modeled what he had wished his mother the second time around had been, to the point he didn’t even blink when he had been called mama.

And Vlad… he had always wanted to be a father. Lex had squandered his chances with the clones, just as Vlad had the first time around, but he refused to do anything less than his best for his children.

So, co-parents. It was much easier in the Infinite Realms than it would have been on earth with its infinite ways to ask the exact wrong questions, which had given them time to figure out the dynamic between them again as they regained ghostly power. They had landed on ‘family that are far too much alike and should be kept separate to prevent problems’.

In other words… partners in crime. Although in this case it was less crime than… no, actually the crime was in at least equal parts to everything else in the plan. They needed to be on equal footing to set proper boundaries as co-parents, but they also needed some form of safe connection. Causing chaos together seemed to be that connection.

He would have to remember to discuss with Daniel later how he wanted to handle discussing these things with others. Would he want to make up some explanation easier for humans to understand? Or did he want to lean in and cause Bruce Wayne’s brain to break a little at the ‘obvious’ explanation to his having grandchildren? Vlad was predominantly powered by the desire to make up for things taken from others, and the sheer lack of fun in Daniel’s childhood seemed to make him want to mess with everyone around them to amuse him.

Daniela mumbled wordlessly, sleepily, into his coats, and Vlad decided that could wait for later. For now it was worth the cold and the many, many decisions they had to make about their return to earth, to walk back to the GAV with his family, feeling them all, practically glowing with the soft pink of a well-fed obsession for familial love.

***

reveal this chapter: Batman managed to deduce almost everything about becoming a half-ghost in the worst possible way, and is about to tell the goddamn Hellblazer someone used necromantic resurrection juice to punch a hole between planes and got powers out of it. given his canon history with summonings, holy shit is that going to be a bad time

-just to make it clear, Vlad and Danny are not romantic in any way in this story. nor will they be. don’t get me wrong, i ship it, but it’s going to be funnier if they aren’t and ghost zone norms means they don’t even think about how they look from the outside most of the time

-real monster there, Brucie. love-powered family man who knows he can get folded by the family’s doctor

-surprised i updated again so soon? got inspired making up a ghost zone explanation for Vlad seeing Danny as his son or equivalent-generation family member AND being able to co-parent with him without their brains freaking out on them from the implications and imagining how that’s gonna play out

-Vlad is totally going to forget to ask Danny about it, so when the batfam learn there’s grandbats afoot, Danny isn’t even going to be thinking about how it looks, and Vlad is going to answer any questions about it with the most confusing or enraging answers he can think up on the spot, because he may be redeemed, but he is always going to desire fucking with Superman and everyone else in the Justice League

-it would not make Batman feel ANY better to know Vlad with kids is, in fact, incredibly dangerous to a degree rarely seen by mortal eyes. he will also not feel any better to learn it's because Vlad's core has similarities to a Violet Power Ring and becomes massively powerful and destructive the more love you feed it

@hinari , @blankliferain , @grimdarling69

[about-faces]

Two different versions of Cassandra and Harvey’s first (and to date, only notable) encounter.

Sources: the Batman: No Man’s Land novelization by Greg Rucka vs the original comic version from Detective Comics #734 (July 1999), “Mark of Cain, Part 2,” by Kelley Puckett, Damion Scott, and John Floyd.

[ellesthots]

Fateful Beginnings

III. “the alley”

parts: previous / next

plot: chasing down your interview subject lands you in a sticky situation.

pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x fem!reader

cw: 18+, almost sexual assault, noncon physical touch, violence

words: 2.5k

You could tell by the bright yellow caution tape surrounding the blocks nearby that you’d finally arrived. Officers were stationed around the tape with a crowd beginning to form. Masses shuffled out of nearby clubs to see the drama, muttering amongst themselves about what it could be. None of them were correct. Another shooting? A stabbing? A drug bust? You heard murmurs of Where is he? which you could only imagine was about the man of the hour, the Batman.

Snaking your way around the officers would be difficult, but not impossible. The onlookers guaranteed a degree of anonymity, so you slink between distracted groups of friends and wove through the crowd, ducking under the tape and into the alley. Once there, the darkness was protective. Blaring sirens deafened your ears, causing a shudder on your spine as you trekked through the blackened night. The only thing that gave you any idea of where you were was the brick you kept your palm on as you walked, dust collecting on your fingertips from untouched cement.

It was eerily quiet, which unnerved you. Gotham was never this quiet, always with a constant backdrop of cars, drunks, and blood-curdling screams. As you kept forward, the commotion began to leave your ears. It seemed to fade into the distance rather quickly—either that, or you were walking much faster than you anticipated. When would this alley end?

Almost as if you'd asked for it out loud, you started to hear wet, frantic footsteps splashing through puddles ahead. You squinted your eyes to try and cut through the shroud of darkness, but to no avail. Then, frantic yelling. You pressed your back to the brick as you saw a flashlight appear in front of a tall, stocky figure a few feet down the alley. "Hey," the voice, a man's, shouted at you. He shone the light right at your face and your vision went white, stinging your tired eyes. "What's a lady like you doing back here, huh?" His tone was conniving, setting off your body's alarm system.

You turned and started to run, but he removed the light source as soon as he noticed you were on the move. Not ten steps after, you fell flat on your chest, tripping over a wood block mid-step. Your hands protected your face, your palms taking blunt trauma rather than your nose. You felt the familiar, childhood sting of scraped hands and elbows as you heard his footsteps creep closer. Fuck. This was so stupid, fuck. You started babbling, anxious. "Please, I'm just trying to get home,"

"A girl like you doesn't live over here." You heard him spit somewhere, hopefully not on you. You felt a hard tug on your right shoulder and found yourself yanked over onto your back. He threw the lit flashlight down onto the ground and it made a strong clang. The rain stung your eyes and hands, thundering down and into your jacket and soaking your clothes underneath. You began scooting backward and scrambled to get up on your knees as you were shoved back onto the concrete, further grating your palms. You yelped out in pain as he pinned you face-down on the alley floor with a grunt. "Not my first choice of broad, but you'll have to do." He chuckled and you heard the rummaging of clothes. Oh my god. I’m about to get assaulted.

Your jaw dug into the ground as he palmed your ass over your pants, giving it a slap with the hand that wasn't pressed between your shoulder blades. Suddenly you felt a breeze on your lower back, through the rain hearing a tearing of fabric. You squeezed your eyes shut and let your body go limp as you felt the breeze extend down your ass, to your thigh, and then down to your calf. Hard rain pelted against newly exposed skin. A white noise filled your ears, stifled sobs stuck deep in your chest as he started unzipping. You balled your sore, bloody fists in preparation, begging it to be over quickly.

Except...you didn't feel anything. The man gasped and you heard a thud. Adrenaline rushing through your tired, cold limbs propelled you up and you quickly stood, yanking your jacket off and hastily wrapping it around your hips. More thuds, then an unintelligible shout. You couldn't tell what was happening, and started to hobble back the way you came. You heard another thud and clang, and noticed the alley was illuminated behind you. Nervously, you looked over your shoulder and saw him: the Batman, rain-soaked and angry. He was crouched over the man, his gaze rising. Your eyes connected for a moment and you froze.

You again. He didn't know what to make of you. You were difficult to read. You didn't look like the city; you looked too innocent, too kind. Yet you had this persistence that made you do such ridiculous—if not impressively tenacious—things such as wandering around a crime scene in Gotham City in the dead of night. He glanced down and noticed your pants were torn and shredded in a pool around your ankles. His jaw tightened, molars starting to grind together. He'd thought you were just getting mugged, not... this piece of shit... his fists pressed firmer into the perpetrator as the man began to gasp for breath, struggling against him. Who would do that to someone? What made someone think they had ownership over someone else's body like that? To take it at any time? He looked down and stared into the waning eyes of the criminal, rage burning in his throat.

You had never seen someone die before, and you started to panic. The vigilante was staring at the man and pressing harder, harder, harder into their chest until the dude sputtered. "Stop, stop!"

He immediately jumped back, panting. He'd never come that close to killing someone.

He shot a frazzled look at you. His knuckles clenched tight, bent to perfectly cup the criminal's neck to snapping. He tried to hide his shock at having momentarily lost control.

You stared back at him, nervous. He was just... sitting there. Would he hurt you? You had a peculiar, yet strong sense you were safe here, but was that real? No one truly knew much about Batman; what if he was just as bad as the criminals he fought?

Looking at you in the alley triggered something deep within him. His palms began to sweat and he suppressed images of his childhood, the sound of gunshots ringing in his ears rendering him unsteady. You peered at him, nervous, stuttering a few steps back. The criminal, still choking and gasping, struggled up to his knees.

Batman’s heart raced and pulse echoed in his ears; he refocused, grabbing the criminal by the shirt and tossing him behind you both. The stranger landed on his knees, scrambling up to bolt down the alley from whence he came. It was now just you and Batman, and he looked... nervous? And his eyes... somehow they shined through the dark night.

"Go home." His voice was gruff, yet somehow still piercing through the thundering rain, echoing thickly off the balmy brick. You instinctually followed his order as if he was some sort of supernatural force, but stopped before exiting his eyeline entirely. The interview.

He was still staring at you, motionless besides some flexing of his fists. "Wait." You gulped down fear, adrenaline still coursing through your veins, staring down the dripping, armored mountain before you. You were surprised the words slipped past your lips. "I want to interview you for GU—"

"Go home." He tried to make his voice menacing as flashbacks caused nightmares in his mind, pelting him with suppressed memories of gunpowder and screams. You didn’t move, and his jaw set.

You weren't backing down without a bit of a kick, desperate, hyperaware this was the last time you’d ever have this opportunity. "It's why I came out ton—" He interrupted you with a hissing shout, slipping through your fingers.

"Do I have to tell you again?" You were audacious, he'd give you that. He narrowed his gaze to a glare and straightened his back to help tower over you, even twenty feet away. He didn't have the capacity to monitor his tone, his throat becoming more swollen and constricted as the images and sounds screeched inside.

"Please?" He wasn't having a lick of it, you could tell. His eyes were narrowed, chest heaving, tone bitingly bitter. He had a miserly quality about him, as if he were acting as savior whilst resenting people for it.

"Being here alone is a stupid thing to do. Don't let me catch you out here again." With that, he disappeared up the brick to the roofs of Gotham, barely concealing his panting, rushed breaths as he tried to calm himself off the edge of a panic attack.

You managed to get home without a hitch, which was a miracle. The swarms of people on the main road due to the club evacuations allowed you to slip into a nobody, a faceless member of the horde. You showered off the chill and the sting of your scalp left you reeling, a manifestation of your frustration toward the Batman. He'd wanted nothing to do with the affair, and you tried not to brainstorm more topics that night, letting your mind off the hook to simply be thankful he had intervened at all... even if he'd kinda been an ass about it.

The day was much the same, holing yourself up to your apartment. You didn't have any other classes besides journalism, didn't have to work due to your scholarship, and had just enough money left to get you through the next two weeks until you graduated and left Gotham permanently. It was maddening being so close to the end of something yet having no clue how to finish it. A part of you wanted to walk to the corner store just to have some human interaction, but you were more tender to the reality of living downtown now. It wasn't safe here, not even being outside for a moment.

You awoke the next day feeling restless from 36 hours contained to your studio. You vacillated between being tormented by lack of inspiration and doing everything you could to distract and fill the time. Crocheting? Too mindless. Television? The same. That final paper clung to every passing thought like a wet napkin. It nearly sent you spiraling; you were without a single word on the page, with twenty of them to fill.

You'd drawn up a plan the rest of that day, figuring it would take you at least two days to write the paper to your specifications, which gave you just under five days to: find an interviewee, develop a thesis and ensuing questions, and gather the data. You cursed yourself for ever choosing a class as heavy in writing as journalism for your last term. At least a PE credit would have let you blow off steam.

By the time it hit seventy hours in your apartment you nearly threw yourself out the window to feel something other than the crushing weight of the deadline. Phone calls haunted your dreams where you had to admit to your parents you couldn't finish college because you couldn't stop something as simple as writer's block. It consumed you, both day and night, pulling the color out of your face and emphasizing the dark crescent moon under your eyes. With a solid "fuck it", you threw on some sweats and hunkered down to the corner store. Rai would be a pleasant sight. He'd ask about your classes as he always did, and maybe he'd even have some ideas.

The sky stung your eyes after essentially living in a cave for the better part of three days, though it was cloudy and dark as it ever was in the city. The infamous scent of chemical rain stung the lining of your nose, prickling every microscopic hair to annoyance. It beseeched you how difficult this assignment was; nothing, no assignment in all your years of academia, had stirred you as much as this one. It plucked at the edges of your skin with relentless animosity, gleeful as you spiraled deeper into what eerily resembled a depressive episode. The experience of this paper was rattling your bones, and you were close to calling up the school counselor.

Your palm shoved the slick handle of the store door open, the familiar ding and "Welcome in!" forcing you to hide your chagrin. A quick flit of your eyes to the register and you noticed Rai wasn't on shift. Ugh.

You walked toward the register to check out the deli. Rai always had delicious surprises, and offered you the 'student discount', which was really nonexistent—just kindness from the sweet acquaintance. Hell, at this point he was one of your closest friends. You could’ve laughed at how lonely you were, if it weren’t so fucking painful.

Except today, the deli was empty. You checked your phone with confusion, sure you’d gotten here before even the earliest time he’d closed it. Peering over at a young woman you'd never seen before, you asked if he was okay. Rai was as reliable as the rain in Gotham.

Sheepish, she cleared her throat lightly before perking up. "Actually um, our family was asked to cater at the city hall meeting tonight!" Visibly excited, she rambled on. "Rai is my brother, he's with our mother prepping the dishes."

"Oh, cool!" You drudged up the small amount of enthusiasm still left within you and mustered interest. "That'll be good for business, I'm sure."

The young woman nodded so quickly you feared her head might roll off. Her excitement became palpable and you couldn't help but grin as she prattled on. "Definitely! My mom was so happy when we got the invite, Mr. Wayne sent us a handwritten letter with a BONUS inside!"

And then it hit you like sharp, salty wind, and you bid a quick farewell to scurry back to your apartment. You dialed up Dr. Vry after pulling her number from the syllabus, praying she hadn't left the office early. On the last ring she answered, chewing on something on the other line. "Dr. Janay Vry speaking."

"Dr. Vry, hey! It’s Y/N. Would you be able to give me one of the department’s press passes for the event at city hall tonight?" The keys were chilled in your hand from the outside air and you put her on speaker as you rushed your clothes off.

"Well hello to you too, Ms. Y/L/N. I'm afraid I was just packing up."

"Please, I found someone to interview." You yanked off your socks and unclipped your bra. You needed to shower and be out the door as quickly as possible.

"And who could be so important as to call me on a Friday evening twenty minutes before I retire home?" She sounded aloof, not quite frustrated yet.

"Bruce Wayne.”

[gothamite-rambler]

Dimensional Crossroads: Martha

Context: Portals from a mysterious source have been opening up around the world. Recently, Jason made the mistake of falling through one, along with a version of himself that didn’t die horribly. But it doesn’t stop there. In another dimension, Martha Wayne survived the robbery, while her husband and son fell victim to the mugger.

In her world, her Robins are called Doves—comprised of Kate Kane, Beth Kane, Barbara Gordon, and Stephanie Brown. Martha has been through a lot: dealing with creepy stalkers, facing a Joker-like Selina Kyle, and burying her grief. Now, she and Bruce are about to be surprised to see each other, even if they aren’t their versions.

Batwoman, aka Martha Wayne, landed effortlessly from the portal above, her feet touching down silently. She smiled, feeling satisfied with her graceful entrance.

Batwoman!Martha (age unknown): I still got it.

She surveyed her unfamiliar surroundings, taken aback by the array of heroes and villains that surrounded her, but she steeled her focus.

Batwoman!Martha: Hm, Giovanni mentioned I’d land in places different from my own. But this place is really something… a gender-swapped version of my world?

She groaned after using that word, realizing it was a term Barbara had recently become obsessed with as she delved into fan culture. Barbara had been sharing all sorts of things with her, and "gender swap" popped up frequently in those discussions.

Batwoman!Martha: I’ve been around Barbara for too long if I’m referencing her.

With a sigh, Batwoman retrieved a device given to her by her version of Oracle, designed for navigating these dimensions. It blinked with data about her new environment.

Batwoman!Martha (fascinated): Huh, I was somewhat right. This place has a… Batman? Where is he? I hope he’s not my husband, driven mad by some dark fate… I can’t deal with that again.

As she hummed to herself, Batwoman wandered through the chaos until she spotted a man in a blue-and-black spandex suit and a young blonde woman in a purple spandex outfit. She then stepped forward to the figure of Batman, who was assessing the pandemonium before him. She tapped his shoulder gently.

Batman turned around and saw the strange woman in a batsuit that closely resembled his own.

Batwoman!Martha: Oh my... God.

Martha instinctively covered her mouth in shock. Behind the cowl and suit, she recognized him—her Bruce, now all grown up.

Batwoman!Martha (whispering): You’re here and… alive?

Batman (monotone): I’m assuming I died in your dimension. Are you my cousin, Kate? If so, I hope you’re not as aggravating. And please, don’t be a stalker.

Martha sniffled as her tough exterior began to crumble, and she pulled him into a warm embrace. Nightwing and Spoiler exchanged shocked glances, concern etched on their faces. Batman, on the other hand, was bewildered by the sudden hug.

Batman: Ma’am, whoever you are, let go.

Spoiler (shouting): Yeah, he’s not a hugger!

Batman (annoyed): Spoiler!

Spoiler (shrugging): You’re not!

Martha’s eyes widened in realization, and she quickly pulled away, embarrassed by how she must have looked to these strangers... with the exception of Bruce.

Batwoman!Martha: Oh dear, sorry! I’m making assumptions, young man.

Batman (in his 40s): Young man?

Nightwing: Ha, he's old as hell!

Batman groaned, covering his eyes in annoyance. Batwoman, still in shock, could only smile at the potential adult version of her son. She had so many questions but knew she couldn't reveal them in a public area where people were running around in a frenzy.

Batwoman!Martha: I mean, uh… adult man. You are an adult man! Tax filing age. Nice suit, very well made. It’s loud here. How about you and I—just us—head to your Batcave to discuss all this?

Batman (suspicious): Um, sure, but in a few minutes. I need to handle this situation first before it escalates.

Batwoman!Martha: Oh, right! I almost forgot the intensity of what we’re facing. I admire your focus on the task at hand. Mind if I lend a hand?

Batman (confused): Sure. If you’re a version of me, I assume you’re a hero.

Batwoman!Martha (pulling out a sleek red and black gun): All right! Let me get my proper weapon—Batgun. Who should I aim for?

Batman swiped the gun from her grasp, walking away while gesturing for Martha to follow.

Batman: I don’t know what the rules are in your dimension, but here, I don’t use guns and I don’t kill. I hope you can respect that while you’re here.

Batwoman!Martha: Oh, of course... of course.

Batwoman!Martha (in her head): Poor Brucie must have been traumatized after losing… me. Is Thomas alive? I’ll ask about him later. For now, I can fight alongside my son!

Batwoman!Martha (speaking out loud): Lead the way, sonny, and we can catch up afterward.

Batman (finding her odd): Honestly, you’re very strange to me right now and I'm not sure what catching up means in this context.

Batwoman!Martha: Oh, don’t worry! You’ll understand at the Batcave.

Batman rolled his eyes, still unaware of the true identity of this version of Batwoman. All he wanted was to resolve the chaos of the night.

To be continued...

[armed-with-a-waffle-iron]

The Bat Family Timeline and Ages (Post-Crisis and New Earth) with Sources

Evidence

In Batman: Year One, Bruce is said to be 25 in the January he returns to Gotham. The 1976 DC Calendar puts Bruce's birthday on the 19th of February so Bruce is 26 during his first outing as Batman in April.

Marv Wolfman's Batman: Year Three (Batman vol. 1 #436) tells us that Dick Grayson's parents die in Bruce's third year. In Batman vol. 1 #441 (also by Wolfman) Tim says that Robin started appearing around 6 months after the death of the Flying Graysons. For Dick's age when he becomes Robin, see below.

Bruce joins the Justice League before Dick forms the Teen Titans. Both these teams form before Barbara Gordon becomes Batgirl at 16 (Batgirl: Year One).

Barbara and Dick are each other's dates to their high school prom and so are less than 2 years apart in age (Detective Comics vol. 1 #871).

I suspect Dick, who was an emancipated minor, graduated high school and started college a year early, which allows Dick and Barbara to have some time as the new Dynamic Duo, as we see in Batman Family.

Dick Grayson is 18 when he forms the New Teen Titans, all of whom are also teenagers (Nightwing vol. 2 #137 by Wolfman, who also created the New Teen Titans).

Dick Grayson is 19 when he becomes Nightwing (Batman vol. 1 # 416).

21 year-old Helena becomes Huntress (Huntress: Year One #1), and interacts with Batgirl, meaning that Barbara is not yet Oracle.

Jason dies at 15, 4 months before his 16th birthday (Batman Files). This is before the New Teen Titans' third year anniversary (New Titans #71), before any of the Titans turn 22 (Deathstroke vol. 1 Annual 1), 2 years after Dick becomes Nightwing and almost 10 years before Dick's parents are killed (Batman vol. 1 #436). Dick is hence 21 during these events and 11 when he became Robin.

I also kinda like Dick being 17 years younger than Bruce because that's also the age difference between Adam West and Burt Ward from the 60s TV series.

After these events, Tim Drake becomes Robin and is 13-14 (Batman vol. 1 #441 and Robin II #1)

Soon after, Stephanie Brown is 15 when she becomes Spoiler (Secret Origins 80-Page Giant).

Stephanie is still 15 when she realises that she is pregnant (Robin vol. 2 #59) and Tim is almost 15 during this time (Secret Origins 80-Page Giant).

Cassandra Cain is 17 when she comes to Gotham during this time (Batgirl vol. 1 #1), during No Man's Land which lasts one year.

Helena’s family were killed when she was 8 and during Batman/Huntress: Cry For Blood, Tim says the murders happened roughly 15 years ago, making her roughly 23 during this storyline.

Cass turns 18 in January (Batgirl vol. 1 #39), Tim Drake turns 16 (Robin vol. 2 #116), Jason would have turned 18 in August (Detective Comics vol. 1 #790), and Stephanie is 16 when she "dies" (Batman Allies Secret Files & Origin).

Personally I'd re-arrange Tim's 16th birthday to be the last of these events four events to accommodate him still being 17 late into the Batman: Reborn, see below.

Jason soon returns to Gotham as Red Hood, not long before Infinite Crisis, 52 and One Year Later.

Following the one year time skip, Dick says it's been almost 10 years since his misadventures with Metal Eddie and Liu as a 16-17 year old (Nightwing vol. 2 #133 by Wolfman), which makes sense because he would be 25 by my math.

Stephanie returns from her time as a medical volunteer in East Africa, finishes high school and begins university during Batman: Reborn. She'd turn 19 by the end of this year by my math, which is a typical age to be begin attending university (Gotham Underground and Batgirl vol. 3 #1).

Dick calls Damian Wayne a "10 year-old" before Stephanie attends university (Batman and Robin vol. 1 #2) and Steph still calls Damian a "10 year-old" while she's in her second semester (Batgirl vol. 3 #13 and Batgirl vol. 3 #17). He might have turned 11 before the reboot.

Batwoman: Elegy (Detective Comics #858), during the Batman: Reborn year, shows that Kate was 12 when she was kidnapped and saw her mother and sister killed. This incident is also said to happen "20 years ago”, making her 32 and hence 30-31 during her first appearance in 52/One Year Later.

Tim Drake is still 17 while Steph is in her second semester of her first year at university, and it's stated that he is meant to be in his senior year at high school (Batgirl vol. 3 #13, Red Robin #17 and Red Robin #25). It's possible he turns 18 before the reboot.

Mistakes I Made

Cassandra Cain is 21 in Year Eighteen.

The "Titans disbands" in Year Thirteen was definitely a year early but it's done.

[brucewaynehater101]

Running over here to give an idea spawned from binging Pretty Cure transformations

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The Drakes uncover artifacts on land once owned by their very own ancestors, to which they are the closest related descendents of

This gives them the absolute rights to distribution, and considering they spend less time with Tim than desirable, it's gifted to their boy in hopes of bonding with him through their ancestry

The last thing Tim expected upon opening the vintage birdcage was for the perch to swing and the sudden appearance of an bearded vulture flying out and soaring all over the room

Even stranger? The bird looked like it came out of a painting, from the brushstrokes to the exaggerated colors, like, its feathers were a wine red instead of red-orange one would expect

Oh, and the cheering—"Free! I'm free! Child, did you free me from my prison? Splendid! Spendid! I can cast revenge on those dastard Drakes at long last! Long last!"

Unfortunately for birdie here, they've been imprisoned for so long that any Drakes who imprisoned them are long dead

Remaining descendents are all innocent in this conflict

"A shame, a shame indeed, but now that I no longer fear them, and you too are ignorant of why they did not pass down their evil, I should give thanks to you."

"Tell me your Deepest Dream, and I'll isee if we can fulfill it."

Introducing Mes'Dremere, a painting granted life by magics long ago

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I haven't developed quite a backstory, I'll leave it to you guys to brainstorm, but this vulture (they/them) isn't going to be having any beef with living Drakes since their sworn enemies died long ago

More trivia, their name is a blend of Mesmerize and Dream

They are far from the only magical being to slip through the cracks and go unknown for so long

Tim Drake, descended from a line with the power to ensnare one of Mes'Dremere's power, is a canary in the coalmine so to speak, seeing strange beings that appear to do nothing, but attach themselves to practically everyone, even Batman

And with every rogue attack, every act of corruption, and especially Arkham Breakouts they only grow more numerous

He can even photograph them

"This isn't my Deepest Dream, I still need to figure it out, but can you tell me if there's a monster on this man's head, or if I'm just hallucinating?"

"To think, to think, I would ever see such a thing again. My boy, an awful, awful evil has beat me here, such that it will cast this place into a greater despair than ever seen before, before."

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Hollowing Wish, entities as older than Mes'Dremere; they seek personhood, purpose, dreams and the will to go forward by feeding from unprotected and unsuspecting victims, so that they may finally end their everlasting hopelessness

But saying they are eating victims into depression isn't true. When someone, for example, expresses willpower, they release an energy the Hollowing Wish will then consume. A junk food compared to getting it from the source, right inside. It's not enough for them

Pursuing a fruitless path to ending their plights, Hollowing Wishes take but never give to even themselves, only continuing the ever downwards spiral

victims can include but are not exclusive to: people, animals, and objects granted oh so much love and care

Regarding the last one, objects have a dense core inside them of all the deeply held feelings towards them, whilst surrounding it are the passing feeling people have for it

In the rare case of a Wish attaching to a target for so long, the two will become one, becoming something that could be mistaken for a meta, alien or something else---this form is a Nightmare Awakening

they unleash their pain and greedily keep their happiness locked away in their head in a desperate bid to hold into the remains being sapped away from the brain---until the target is reduced to a hollowed husk with nothing left within

As for the Hollowing Wish? they fucjing combust since taking in joy fresh from the fruit pulp instead of the juice is more than they're built to contain, leading to surrounding area and beings being entrenched in brief happiness, and then an onslaught of magical despair until the magical despair in the area and people dries up over time

What is it that causes them to spawn? Who migrated here, bringing their anguish with them?

The Hollowing Wish is an extension of a will, a will in even greater despair---Praying For a Forever Demise

"To think it was a Forever Dream they prayed for long ago, but then, but then?"

"Their unending praying manifested into a terrible, terrible demise . . . a name so long is easier to call Praying. It too serves well enough in reminding us how we got here, does it not, does it not?"

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More tethered to the physical plane as one born into it, Tim is offered the power to become a hero himself, specialized to fight against the Hollowing Wishes

But he's just a fanboy! Wouldn't Batman or even Robin be better?

"Speaking from personal experience, he seems like far the man who would let these practices into his life, even with him having no other choice, no choice."

"Besides, besides, Robin must have his plate full, plate full. What better way to express your love for the Bats, than to ease their burdens, no matter how thankless, how thankless?"

"His own body can only go so far, hold so much, so much magic indeed."

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The streets have begun to talk of a boy . . .

"Magical Boy!" "Do you think Gotham is some kind of Sailor Moon episode?"

A boy without a mask yet crusading as the Bats do. Unrecognized like them; magic it must be

"I'm Dreaming of Robin," he says he is, "but I've never met Robin or Batman yet."

Colloquially, Dreaming Robin or Dream(s) Robin

He's found where the Bats won't be, putting a stop to crime, giving thankless aid, and other acts of public service

But stranger is that which he grants and insists people keep around their house for protection

Blank photographs that upon touch become depictions of the little things that grant a bit more joy

And less pressure on their shoulders

By Dreaming Robin's side is a vulture, a guardian calling themself Mes'Dremere

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Magical Boy Dreaming of Robin, Tim Drake. What does his arsenal hold? Listen Right Up!

[Materialized Eternity] is the ability to utilize photographs Tim takes by pouring his magic into his photos of choice

Say for example that Tim photographed Nightwing quadruple backflipping, a feat impossible for Drake

If Tim puts magic into that picture and he has it on his person, he will be able to reenact that quad-backflip just like Nightwing did, but doing so will drain the magic in the photo like a battery

After running out, the picture would need to be recharged on magic to be put to use again

That's just one way Tim can use the magic

[Lasting Photoshoot] the ability to pause time on entities and an area right after Tim takes a photo of for a short period of time

[Merry Memory] is the power to take a blank photograph and enchant it to protect people from magic by taking the image of something they love. It's Tim's go-to for defending people and himself from Hollowing Wishes

[Realization in Reach], Realization for short, is a magical staff and his primary weapon, as it can channel Tim's latent magical powers along with his gifted ones.

While feasible as a physical weapn, it gives Tim's magic more strength and a much wider area of effect. Emphasis on the more strength which Tim has to be careful about

[Forever Remember] is the power to photograph a Hollowing Wish that Tim defeats and thus seal them permanently within those photos

Photoed Wishes can be weaponized against other Wishes and Nightmares to make them fight for the same resources they crave. When weaponized wishes run dry, unlike Eternities, those Wishes effectively die and cease to exist

the photo becomes blank, and can picture something else

Tim also has safes with as much scientific and magical security employed, storing albums with Hollowing Wishes and Materialized Eternities to swap out 

Now for The Best Part yet!

"My Deepest Dream, I'll make you true!" A heirloom locket holding Tim's most precious photo of Robin he's ever taken, it is his chosen transformation item

(here's to hoping it never gets taken away due to that very picture within, because Tim won't be the only person fucked over by it)

As a rule of thumb, Dreaming Robin's outfit, his arsenal, and the photos he gives to protect against Hollowing Wishes all look like they came out of a painting, specifically what you get when googling "mystical painting"

Tim does learn some other magics that can be used to fight against Hollowing Wishes, Nightmare Awakenings and purify an area and people suffering the affereffects of a Hollowing Wish exploding and spreading their despair everywhere

Yeah Tim is gonna angst every time he fails to save a Nightmare Awakening before it's too late for them, poor him :(

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In unrelated news? Tim has himself a pet too well trained, yet several times proven unabused and pampered

American Robin Dreams Come True 'Dreams' who people swear came from a painting despite their vibrant feathers being so picturesque, and vibrantly red all naturally

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Gotham is yet again the source of insanity. That being strange monsters that abruptly show themselves to people before forcibly turning them into monsters

Thankfully, Dreaming of Robin always comes to save the day

Hollowing Wishes, he calls these monsters

Nightmare Awakenings, the victims are named

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Some extra deets

Haha depression go brrrr

Praying For a Forever Demise is like this due to how much anguish, and hollowness they hold, and the desire for joy they want &/or used to have

Maybe they got their depression all naturally, or maybe magical shenanigans lead to them possessing an ungodly amount of it inside of them idk, maybe a blend of both

But yeah, Praying is only going to put to a stop when help and empathy is placed in front of them, and the shot of a happy dream everlasting is finally in reach

Also uh, Praying isn't wholly aware of wtf is going on outside of their head as they stew in their despair, with the rare blips of hope provided by Hollowing Wishes

Their situation is similar to a powerful deity unaware of their godhood and untrained into their powers which need to actively be restrained, but that has evidently not happened

so yeah, they're unknowingly spreading their depression everywhere

Or maybe they have come to awareness that spreading Hollowing Wishes is what they're doing and have compartmentalized that, it doesn't stop their depression from being worse nor even more Wishes spawning but willful ignorance is intoxicating

idk how they traveled to Gotham either lol, but they're dead center in Arkham Asylum, and with it being the new source for Hollowing Wishes, its gonna became way, way worse than in canon

Also prior to being Praying For a Forever Demise, they were Praying For a Forever Dream, do with this knowledge what you will

Are other Drake artifacts magical as well? You decide!

For clarification, Tim's magical boy alias, "Dreaming of Robin" is maybe an accident where he just states that "yeah I dream of Robin, he's my hero" but people thought he was stating his name so it stuck

Or maybe he intentionally introduces himself like that for the symbolic name

Mes'Dremere employs a whitelist geass preventing people from finding out Tim is Dream Robin unless they're whitelisted

I'm thinking that Tim could accidentally snatch up future Waynes into his team, and under Mes' tutelage, Stephanie, Duke, Cassandra and maybe even Damian

I think Jason, after dying and reviving, and he alongside Damian due to the Lazarus Pits, would be especially vulnerable to Hollowing Wishes, so woof

Side note, I think Tim would offer Jason-as-Robin the chance to become a Magical Boy with him, only for him to decline and after resurrection thinking

"I should've taken the Magical Boy route when I had the chance," lmao

Idk if Tim would still become a Teen Titan here, but it'd be neat if all of the Young Justice core four and maybe more became/joined the magical boy & girl team

Since Arkham is a breeding ground of Hollowing Wishes, people there are the least likely to become Nightmare Awakenings since they all have countless Hollowing Wishes attached to them

that means several Wishes are fighting for resources against eachother to sap up expressed will/joy/accomplishments etc.

Because they're fighting over the same person, often dying in the process and others joining the fray in fighting over their victims, they often make little progress in making way to becoming Nightmare Awakenings

So yeah, where as Batman and the clan will be more focussed on their rogues, Tim is more worried about normies who are more likely to fall victim to Hollowing Wishes

That being said, he doesn't wanna see a rogue or bat become a Nightmare Awakening, so he gives them both tons of Merry Memories and get rid of as many Hollowing Wishes on them as he can

And he's rightfully afraid, all hell will break loose if they subcumb to Nightmarehood

Feel free but not pressured to expand on this as you all wish

A magical boy Tim AU? Hell yeah.

Some additional ideas to add:

Tim's outfit comes from the culture present at the time of when Mes'Dremere was imprisoned. Tim has absolutely no choice in this matter, which is an initial point of contention. However, it eventually becomes a point of pride and comfort

The culture is one specific to this AU (so there's no cultural appropriation). Similar to Atlantis, Krypton, and other lost societies, Tim starts to discover their practices, rituals, customs, etc when he's trying to connect to his roots (since it's also the culture of his ancestors).

Jason rejects becoming a magical boy because he's "a literature nerd, not that kind of nerd." Tim's a little offended by this, but they get over it quickly. Jason also grumbles when he gets the All Caste because he ended up becoming a magical boy anyways, just without the transformation scene.

There can be angst added where Jason says Robin is magic so he doesn't need to become a magical boy. Then Jason dies and ends up getting All Caste.

Tim ends up learning a lot about psychology as a nonmagical way to help people as well. If there are fewer depressive symptoms, there's less for the Hollowing Wishes to feed on. Also, mental health techniques/coping mechanisms can delay the progression into a Nightmare Awakening.

The YJ core don't end up becoming magical boys/girls except for Bart. They do team up, though, and Tim helps a lot in battles even when there aren't Hollowing Wishes.

Cass would definitely vibe with becoming a magical girl since there's no killing. She'd probably do both the magical girl routine and become a Bat cause she's awesome like that

Would Damian view the Wishes as creatures?

Tim is able to form a different type of friendship with Zatana, Raven, and Anita due to his magical status. He also likes to call up Constantine to bother the poor bastard (it's funny to him).

[bonesbitchesboutcomicbooks]

Batman: No Man’s Land

Just some cute panels of Babs and her family :)

Jean-Paul

Jim

Cass

Jim and Cass

Bruce

Bruce and Cass

[artbyblastweave]

Okay, here's a Worm question: the idea of Taylor Hebert as a Spider-Man deconstruction is pretty well established, with your old post on the subject being its clearest expression. But what other bits of superheroic DNA went into her character? I've been chewing on this idea - inspired by that question about Batman: No Man's Land - that Poison Ivy was one of Wildbow's sources of inspiration for Taylor. Ivy ends up taking care of a bunch of orphans in a city park during that storyline, and it was the beginning of her ambiguous villain/antihero turn (though Ivy carries too much baggage to make such a turn permanent). There's also the idea of both Ivy and Taylor being able to enforce their wills at a distance and turn the living beings they subsume into thralls, but that's only a basic similarity.

Any thoughts on Taylor being inspired by Ivy, or any other characters?

It's semiplausible- No Man's Land as a whole feels very baked into the post-leviathan arc's DNA- but I'm hesitant to endorse a real connection, because I think that this is kind of just running into the fact that an incredibly easy way to humanize an otherwise brutal character is to give them a soft spot for kids, or give them an orphan protectorate that they're doing their Usual Terrible Violence on the behalf of. Lone Wolf and Cub Carcinogization

[ariel-seagull-wings]

@thealmightyemprex @themousefromfantasyland @piterelizabethdevries @the-blue-fairie @shiv-multifandom-mess @themetropoliskonboy

So a thing that I'm finding fascinating is learning about granted important elements of superhero lore that originated in medium outside of comic books.

Like the introduction of Superman's origin story as the son of scientists and survivor of the explosion of his home planet who lands on Earth as a baby originating in a newspaper strip series and a novel, while his weakness being Kryptonite, his work in the Daily Planet and his friendship with Jimmy Olsen and Perry White originating in a radio series.

In the world of Batman, you have the character of Barbara Gordon, one of the longest holders of the Batgirl mantle, originating in the 1966 live action TV show and proving to be a character so popular that they end being added to the comics produced at the time and appeared in a lot of movies and cartoons ever since.

The newspaper strips were where people first saw Peter Parker and Mary Jane become a married couple before the idea was brought into the comic books.

And they still continued to be happily married in those strips.

And the X-Men characters Firestar and X-23 were created, respectivelly, for the cartoon shows Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends and X-Men Evolution.

So we audiences tended for years to assume the idea that "movies and TV shows are adaptations, and comic books are THE ORIGINAL SOURCE MATERIAL FOR SUPERHERO STORIES."

But since a lot of elements that flesh out those heroes are created in other medium simultenously with comics, or even originate in medium outside the comics, can we even say that a Original Source Material exists?

Compare and contrast for instance, the character of Scrooge McDuck from the Disney Ducks universe.

He is a character that originates in comics as side character for Donald Duck, even an antagonist one at that, before becoming a protagonist, and then he goes on to star in numerous cartoons.

And here is the catch: most of us enjoy and understand the character in his own right in those cartoons.

There is never a demand to go back to the Original Source Material to enjoy and understand him.

We may go to find and read then if we want to, but we hardly see people debate wether or not "the comics are the right version of Uncle Scrooge and the cartoons are not the real deal."

No matter where you first found the character of Uncle Scrooge, is still all valid as Uncle Scrooge.

Maybe a similar is needed to be taken with superheroes: each person chooses the prefered medium and art form to follow those characters.

Be it a comic book. A newspaper strip. A radio series. A stage musical. A movie. A live action or cartoon TV show. A videogame.

In the end it is all a valid art form meant to make following a character and a world in a way that is accessible for YOU.

[cowchickenbeefpork]

so. A year or two back I remember seeing a post talking about how mayor Oswald was based off Donald trump when he was being written and since I don’t want to rely on hearsay I looked it up and yup it’s real. Look here

I have…multiple problems with this when it comes to this source of inspiration for Oswald. I have around four or five, but the last one or two are long enough to be its own paragraph so let’s start with the first three. The first three are honestly just the first point if I’m being honest lol.

First off, Oswald is a Gay, gender non conforming man who used to be poor. All of these things make him have a different feel to him demonizing the marginalized than someone like trump, famous womanizer and said “small loan of a million dollars”, doing it. It doesn’t feel the same at all, you’re going to have to put more emphasis on the similarities between them besides that demonization and make ____ great again shit to make it land. You would need to and they just don’t ever do that in the show.

also Gotham the reason why what trump did with his generalization and demonization of minorities is bad is because people in those communities are fucking evil to their cores! That’s literally all we see of Hugo strange’s arkham experiments, so by trying to draw this connection to the demonization of them and actual minorities, you’re going to have to write them in a more complex manner, which Gotham doesn’t. Overall this writing choice of inspiration desperately needed this arc to be longer, to have Oswald’s demonization of the outcasts to have serious repercussions and consequences. But it doesn’t, it never does, the show doesn’t even bother to humanize the people they’re using as a vague allegory for what happens in real life. It’s so fucking stupid, this would need a great deal of moral ambiguity but no, the most the Arkham experiments get is at most one scene humanizing them as a whole to my memory of the show.

I’m not saying this as I wish Gotham made Oswald one to one with Donald trump, I’m not and don’t take this post as that. What I’m saying is if you want to make commentary on bigotry, you’re going to have to humanize the outsider group in question, which Gotham doesn’t do because of how much buildup that would take. Oswald doesn’t hold actual disgust for minorities when it comes to his bigotry (though he probably holds some for the poor. Don’t fucking tomato me). His brand of bigotry is more opportunistic to me, seeing the fact people are hating the out group and catering to that in order to get success.

We could’ve genuinely gotten to see a gender non conforming gay man who used to be poor use the same tactics hurled against him throughout his life against a new marginalized group and all the baggage that comes with that. But since the Gotham writers commit to nothing, they didn’t do that since it would require too much work to explore that. It just sucks, it would’ve been so cool to see something that happens in real life so often politically be in this show but it never was since the writers didn’t know how to convey that. It would’ve been fantastic and a great display on how his greed and need for praise hurts other people, but we never got to truly see that, did we?

[002yb]

I don't know, I just really like the idea of a reverse!robins au, you know??? Just little baby Dickie being an absolute menace to a slightly older Jason, and just being completely obvious with his little (huge, enormous, really) crush on Jason, and just Dick being a possessive and jealous little shit as a kid, before they started dating just cracks me up. And like everyone knows about his crush, but they all think its so cute and innocent, and it'll probably go away, right???? Right???? Something like this probably

https://www.tumblr.com/mlim8/691663407306440705/i-want-to-say-how-much-i-love-your-reverse-robins?source=share

https://www.tumblr.com/mlim8/681971460563140608/jaydick-week-day-3-reverse-robins-soulmates?source=share

So I think I may have answered an ask with similar vibes here. (: Here's some thoughts inspired by the first link though! Super cute vibes, kudos to mlim8!

Dick emulating Kon because he genuinely believes Kon is the definition of c o o l g u y. Like, how else could Kon land Tim? The man is playing out of his league; he's a legend. Peak aspiration. Of course Dick is going to be smitten with his older brother's cool boyfriend; Dick needs to learn all the tricks of the trade. He's got his own babygirl to win over. C:

(The term 'babygirl' comes from an overheard conversation and while Kon laughs about it, Tim gets so embarrassed. Despite how he tells Dick to not say that, Dick refuses).

Anyway, Kon? Thriving. Some might call his moves cringe, but Dick is so earnest and hopeful and Kon feels like fucking superman no one can touch him. ;U;

Damian nagging both Tim and Jon about Kon's influence on Dick because Dick won't listen to him; he can't be deterred and Damian is losing his mind over how Dick keeps winking and finger gunning and throwing out these truly terrible, punny lines at Jason and ahhhhhhhh

Basically Damian not liking Kon because of the impact he's had in Dick's life. It's created a hassle for Damian, but more than that? Big brother might be a little jealous. ;3;

Extra detail: Damian didn't like Kon even before Dick came into the picture because he became a distraction for Tim. It's an ongoing argument between Damian and Tim, actually. Damian is convinced Tim keeps Kon around for the sole purpose of annoying him (this isn't the case, but Damian is convinced)

Tim scoffing about it and telling Damian that his envy is showing. Just get laid, damn.

Which Damian gets indignant because no )<

To which Tim smirks a bit and purposefully badgers, 'Alright, Brother Complex (affectionate nickname), if you're threatened by our baby brother stealing Jason from you, then—‘

And Damian hisses because shut up, Drake. Fuck forbid father hear such crass speak omfg Damian will bury Tim himself.

Jason does have a crush on Damian though. The brother complex goes both ways. Or rather, it's a transference sort of deal for Jason that lingers big time because in this verse, Damian chose to save Jason from Joker, consequences be damned. The point stands, Jason is very sweet on Damian.

When Dick realizes this, devastation. Betrayed by his own partner!? Because...maybe Damian would have a similar batman stint where Dick was his Robin?? Yes.

Anyway, Dick refusing to talk to anyone, even Jason. Which is how they all know Dick is distraught.

So despite how it pains Damian, they send in the b i g g u n s: Kon. (:

Who hypes Dick up so hard. Just a bro looking out for his little man, y'know? Kon might hype Dick up a bit too much though because when Dick finally leaves whatever high nook he's sequestered himself away in?

Dick walks right up to Damian and challenges him for Jason outright and the family is caught in a perpetual state of ∑(ﾟﾛﾟ〃) because omfg Bruce is right there watching this play out and Jason is his babygirl, first and foremost.

But Damian accepts the challenge if it means having his brother back. And Damian, the sap, kneeling and drawing Dick in for a hug because fuck, having Dick be mad at him? Someone so happy and hopeful and wonderful? It was like a stab to the heart ngl.

And yes. While Damian's brother complex persists, there's zero intent to act but he still plays into this challenge of Dick's because it's highly motivating for the little punkass twerp.

Meanwhile Jason is just...there. Dumbfounded after Dick winks and shoots finger guns his way with a declaration of: 'you're gonna fall for me some day, babygirl.' But don't worry, Dick will catch him.

And Tim groans because Dick, please.

[popculturebuffet]

Batmarch: The Secret Origin of Batman's Trophys (Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people and welcome back to Batmarch, or celebrations of all things that go bump in the dark knight

Today we've got a special treat... and i'm not just talking the nice art Kev had comissioned! Looks really good and I really appcirated it. Thank you KEv and thank you Alan Patreon. It was a nice suprise gift.

As for what this is about, this was a fantastic idea Kev cooked up: the batcave is one of the coolest hero bases in all of fiction. The layout is never 100% consitant across media but your usually guaranteed a batmobile, a big ass computer at the center, water falls, and over time a display for various costumes from past sidekicks, alternate outfits etc.

What really spruces the place up are three distinct decorations that we almost always see in the comics and ocasionally in other media, if not live action since these bitches would be expensive to make: A giant dinosaur, a big ole penny, and a giant playing card of a joker. These three are staples of the bat cave, to the point when the original was caved in during the earthquakes that ravaged gotham in the build up to no man's land, Bruce made a point of fishing them out for the new cave he built after that traumatic year.

Yet most of us.... have no idea where he got these wonderful toys. Even I didn't. The Joker Card comes from an obvious grinning source, but what CASE did it come from? Where did he get that dinosaur? What was someone using that giant Penny for? It's a question i've asked once or twice but never looked into. Kevin did though, and while the through and lovely DC wiki helped him find each one, he went the extra mile, asking for a review. And I was entirely on board with this comission as I just.. never had those answers and I doubt i'm the only one whose wondered what the context for these things were. So today we're looking at three disntinct golden age batman stories, at a time when goofy nonsense reigned supreme, logic was optional, and weird shit like this was just another day in the batcave. IN other words, this is going to be a LOT of fun so join me under the cut as we look at gambling themed death traps, penny obessed gangsters and batman being hunted by the most dangerous game: mechanical dinosaurs.

The Giant Joker Playing Card:

(from Batman #44)

I love these old titles, such flair and cheese. It's incredible.

Anyways this one starts because Joker decides to hit an off the books casnio after his win. Luckily for them, he just wants to play which feels entirely like a joker move: instead of robbing an easy target that can't call the cops and that the mafia presumibly running it would be stupid to retaliate on, he decides "fuck it let's try this whole gambling thing men, sounds like a hoot and a half".

And sure enough.. it goes really well. He spends what's implied to be the whole night just winning and winning until he cleans house. This being the joker this gambling bug can only end one way

I just.. love everything about this. Joker just had fun at a casnio and turned it into a death trap. It's such a brilliant setup.. and one that while nicely goofy, is also well done: it fits the joker's unpredictablity to just go a gamblin and it fits him just as much to turn a new hobby into a death trap. I also love Lewis' reaction calling it SUPERGAMBLING., like he's some gambling expert and most dangerous game shit is a type of gambling.. which given we're in the dc universe, you probably DO need a name for this kind of thing in the crime world.

So he set shte perfect trap: he has a random balding middle aged man tell the two he has info on a recent raidum theft, raidum a hospital badly needs. To save the presumed orphans about to die without eating their radium, Batman and Robin go to a sketchy island with one house perched on a hill

The World's Greatest Detective.. sees NOTHING wrong with this and goes ahead and gets caught in the most devious trap imaginable.

Several head injuries later, our heroes wake and joker reveals the radium theives, who he captured for this scheme but have kept the radium's location to themselves. This is by deisgn: the joker wants the two and their "radium screts" as the ante here, along with Robin to make sure Batman does this. Batman repedately states "I don't gamble' as if logic suddenly works on the clown man who set up a gambling death trap, so Joker reveals if Batman won't play his three supergambling games, he'll just kill the hostages. Batman reluctantly agrees,

Game 1 is super pinball.

But when Batman proves to be an expert at the snes Joker goes with plan b.. his giant pinball table of death. Sorry his giant SUPER pinball table of death.

As you can see the same joker face from the card is here and you see it all over his lable. it seemed to be Joker's logo back the. I love this whole setup and mostly show it not only because it' sdope but because those pins must've been what bumpers were. I also had no idea PInball used to be a gambling thing. Makes sense, it's just fun to find out.

The game goes well mostly though one of the guys nearly slams into a pin. Thankfully Robin is an expert gymnist and batman smartly saved laucnhing robin till the last minute and Dick's able to save the goon.

Game two is super rolling some dice, which apparently used to land on numbers. This yugioh style death game involves our bait being tied to polls on three of the numbers. If Batman guesses wrong, someone dies. Or maybe not since the board is pretty damn big. Not every death trap can be super murder pinball. Batman spots some mud on the dice though and correctly guesses they'll pivot. This is the weakest of the death traps here, a bit convolunted, not really guranteed to be as deadly. I know the chance of nothing happening is part of it.. but with pinball there's really almost no chance you won't hit the bumpers. Here it feels like pure luck or simple cheating that both dice flew at the joker.

Next game and the one that introduces our prop, though the dice apparently are also in the cave sometimes which I love. The game is a game of cards.. batman has to correctly guess which face matches the door Robin and the hostage goons are in or they'll choke to death on the deadly gas released inside.. and naturally he figures out it's the Joker card. It's too joker not to work.

Turns out though, naturally the joker isn't playing fair both having a final one on one game ofr him and Batman and having his goon go to get robin behind the joker card door... and Robin dispatches him hilaroiusly and awesomely

With that the hostages are free and the final death game begins. A giant super roulette wheel with both batman and joker getting in a slot. looser gets crushed alive. It's an awesome finale, and it fits joker to put himself at risk: after all he risks his life all the time why wouldn't he for such a fun gag?

Batman's able to get the wheel to turn fairly and then escape it, leading to a chase. THe Radium Theives agree to give themselves and the radium up but there's still the matter of the joker and we get a short but neat final chase as Joker uses the dice against the heroes then jumps off a cliff, gambling his life one last time.. and rightfully batman isn't betting on the joker having died.

Gamble With Doom is an excellent story. While the trophy we get out of it is only in it briefly the story itself is pure fun. It has some fun dated elements like Bruce's opinon gambling is EVILLLL and the old fashioned designs on the traps, but it's pure fun. The traps are clever, the tension palpable and the climax great. The gambling motif's really fit the joker and it adds up to an all time great joker story with a suprise impact. The Trophy Itslef. is barely in it but Robin DID break a guy's face with it so i'll say it was still cave worthy.

(From World's Finest #30)

The Penny Plunderer is a name I had heard but had no real context for. I assumed he was some goofy silver age villian with pennies for eyes who drove around chucking pennies at everyone.

I am an artiste.

Instead it's just a guy in a suit. He has the backstory of any good golden or silver age villian to justify his gimmick

I love.. everything about this backstory. It reads like if a writer was given the thought exercise "Make the pettiest batman villian origin you can find.". I mean other villians gimmicks make sense: Poison Ivy was a botonist, Mr Freeze had a horrible accident, the penguin was born looking like a penguin with a lot of money, the Joker fell into a vat of chemicals and came out a clwon, the riddler liked puzzles.

Here Joe just... got screwed over by pennies a lot. Even funnier is that the last one has nothing to do with pennies. Like.. even if it'd had nickels he'd still be arrested.

So Joe vows since pennies runied his life, he'l lbecome the penny! Sadly this does not mean him dressing up like a giant penny with a cane and top hat.. nad now I can't show you it that last drawing put me too far behind and... oh fuck it.

Instead he just wears a suit but makes his gimmick pennies. Commit to the bit man. I do get it as some golden age villians were just guy in a suit, even Joker and Penguin technically counts but one is a clown and the other is a rich penguin man. They have mor ethan just "suit and a vendetta against pennies that somehowturns into stockholm syndrome.

So the penny plunderer begins his reign of terror, setting up a penny arcade as a front, and cashing in a roll of pennies in the most diabolical scheme ever devised by man.

A true criminal mastermind.

Batman picks up on this pattern because it's what he does and finds his next case, a coin and stamp exibiton with a rare one cent stamp. It's here we meet the reason we're here: the giant penny!

Yeah to my shock the penny had NOTHING to do with the penny plunderer other than being at the site of one of his robberies. He prefered just.. chucking pennies at people.. which is awesome and a truly great tactic only topped by Batman's use of said giant penny

I adore the fact that this iconic artifact is there not because it was seized from the villians or a police options.. but because, presumibly, Bruce thought this penny he found was kick ass and bought it off it's actual owner.

Most of the theives escape but they find one willing to squeal. Unfortunatley he dies for his hubris

Yup bet you weren't expecting the penny guy to kill someone and to see his corpse weren't you but here you are. Also batman is apparently a cop now. George Lopez tried to warn us...

But we didn't listen! We didn't listen!

A fight breaks out at the gambling parlour and we get two of the best moments in batman history that much like the blue beetle film, ar ehighly underated.

I just.. I get the sense that is how batman ALWAYS plays pinball. Just judo kicks it every time even as bruce wayne. Both bruce wayne and batman have been banned from so many arcades.. often the same ones. Perks of having a secret identity. We then get coyne once again THROWING pennies at someone and it working. I don't know why he hasn't been brought back with the telkeentic ability to contorl pennies. Give him a copper helmet and a proper costume and oh dammit..

Then Joe knocks batman out iwth his one weakness: a roll of pennies. He's trapped them in the parlor for your standard batman death trap, having removed their belts and ripped out the phone lines as usual. He then throws them a few pennies when then prove to be a mistake as it's time for SCIENCE WITH DR. BATMAN, who uses one old penny, copper, and one new penny, zinc to make a battery. Good thing jimmy didn't wish it away THIS week.

The cops arrive to free one of hteir own and batman finds a clue once the parlor is cleared of gas. Turns out Coyne was catering a penny slot party for a rich billinoare's houseboat, and naturally their filled with gas. I swear it's always gas with these golden age villians. Get another knockout device fellas.

With that our final chase enses as Batman and robin chase Coyne and while he nearly bests them with a good game of 1940's donkey kong

He's foiled by his own gimmick: he has only pennies but the pay telephone.. dosen't.. take 5 seperate pennies for some reason? the hell? I get payphones not taking pennies once they went up to a quarter but come the fuck on 1940's payed telephones. he's foiled.. and sentenced to death.

Yes folks that's the cannoical till some lucky fellow brings him back fate of the penny plunderer: PUT TO DEATH.

This story is as you can tell nonsense that's only gotten more hilarious with the passage of time and I loved every page on it and on getting the panels for this review, I only found MORE hilaroius nonsense to laugh at. We have a story where a guy with a penny gimmick smacks batman with a roll of pennies, trips robin with more, kills a man without pennies, is foiled by pennies yet somehow dosen't actually use the giant penny that's the only reason people know he exists. It's beautiful bollocks and worth your time.

(From Batman #35)

As I hope you are, this issue had me hooked from the first panel: Batman vs dinosaurs being forced to fashion a bow and arrow for some reason. Yes... fuck. Yes. Also nice of bruce to eat Ollie's lunch.

Okay so this story starts, as many real life stories do, with a billionare having a zany idea; Mr. Hart is a man who puts on shows: ice follies, aqua carnival, 40's razzle dazzle type stuff. For his latest idea though he's going above and beyond: a DINOSAUR ISLAND. With mechancail dinosaurs and cavemen who throw giant sponges at you. Thankfully spongebob wasn't born yet but his great great grandpappys quarepants did the honors. Honorable old fool.

To ramp up the insanity, Mr Hart is inviting a club of big game hunters to eat mammoth steak with batman.

If that weren't enough, and in any other golden age story it might be... our heroes get CHALLENGED at dinner by one of the rich assholes. Yeah turns out rich assholes who hunt innocent animals for sport and eat reheated mammoth aren't the most stable indviduals and Mr. Breech scoofs at the fact Mr. Hart says Man is the most dangerous game. He's hunted man, they went down like cowards. COWARDS. He feels Batman couldn't hut a dinosaur without his gadgets, and certainly not his bare hands... even though as this issue with prove and has already shown early man had tools.

To prove his point he challenges batman to a fucking challenge: survive on Dinosaur Island: no utility belt, no vehicles. If the dinosaurs touch him he looses. Mr Breech will man the controls. Honestly i'm convinced Breech knew hart well enough to know he'd both agree to this for the publiclity and why he'd invite batman and robin and just wants to play iwth giant mechanical dinosaurs and also batman. Which granted if I were invited to this sort of thing i'd also want to chase batman with mechanical dinosaurs for fun, who wouldn't, so I totally get it and respect the game.

Hart is on board, offering 5000 to the winner's charity and Batman is like "Why the bat-fuck not. Let's go".

Now you might suspect Breech's real motive is trying to kill batman. I mean you have a setup where batman will be without his weapons, the plausable deniablity of a machine malfunction and a secluded island with 24 hours to kill the batman. And you'd shockingly be wrong. Breech really just wants to prove dinosaurs are the most dangerous game so when that Jurassic Park he's working on opens no one will object to him hunting them for sport.

But his plans are foiled by Chase, anothe rich knob who wants to kill batman and robin to, as he says later form a "crime combine". So he wants a bunch of middle aged guys drinking beers to yell at him for not training the joker on tackling well enough. I see.. well played.

So the game is afoot and our heroes take a bit to catch up, first brushing off a real rock among the sponge rocks as a mistake. Theis ends when a Triceratops to trismash them into a tree. Batman calls for a war council on a nearbye island but naturally THAT'S NO ISLAND

Batman fought a mechanical fucking seamonster. That.. that's cannon. To almost every batman timeline. God bless you Golden Age, god, bless, youuuu. Also i'd be stupid if I didn't say that Tally Ho, Batman! is one of the greatest phrases in batman history up there with "I Am the night" , "I'm batman" and "Something something joker's boner".

So now the games for their lives, Batman and Robin don't have to play fair and start fashioning bows, arrows and knives out of mechanical dinosaur bones. You know.. sometimes this job can be draining: 2-3 reviews a week, many a plan having to be delayed due to a review taking longer than expected.. but then you get a review where Batman and robin have to outrun a manical billinoare who hyjacked dinosaurs from a diffrnet billionare who was having a charity dinosaur hunt with batman and robin using a third billionare's dinosaur, while fashoining weapons from mechanical dinosaur corpses and fashion a kite from a mechanical ptreadon and remember why you love reviewing stuff so mucH: sharinng a good story with the world and finding a good one or two yourself while your at it. And thanks to Kev i've found three truly wonderful, truly bonkers batman stories, with this one being the easy winner. It's both a decent enough concept for the time and hilariously insane.

And I ddin't make up the kite thing: when, after a night of survivial, Robin brings up the batplane, Batman has an idea: since the flying dinosaurs are on a programmed pattren rather than directly controled, they can use them to make themselves a kite yor style.

So to win the day Batman has a plan: he uses himself as bait since Robin's the more agile of the two, and has robin CATAPULT HIMSELF into the air after chase, who is riding on t-rex back with an army of dinosaurs.. and how does he defeat chase' smighty dino army?

It's both genuinely clever and wonderfully bonkers: Robin defeats an evil billionare RIDING a mechanical t-rex.. with water balloons.

Also props to this story: in the previous two the trophy was impressive.. but it was taken from what felt like a minor point in the story: the card flip game was fun as was batman slammin ga door on a guy, but it's sandwitched between far more elaborate death traps, while the penny, again awesome, wasn't even something the penny plunderer used. Batman just bought it off some offscreen character to relive fond memoreies of crushign some crimianls alive with it. Here the main villian ROAD IN on the thing. Granted he still had to likely buy it off his actual owner, but this time at least a criminal actually used it as a murder weapon. I can see Batman wanting this thing for his cave.

Batman chases chase over the now still dinosaurs and punches the guy out. With this Batman's saved the day AND won the bet. 5000 for batmobiles for kids, donate your batmobile today!

As for chase...

With that our story and this trilogy comes to an end.. and as I said, it's great. check out all three of these issues their a lot of fun. Next time dc puts some up for sale I may have to get some 40's batman, this stuff is golden.

Thanks for reading

To conclude batman month: Wait'll you get a load of this