#sounds fucking stupid on paper
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Cannot bring myself to start the latest Dungeon Crawler Carl book because lowkey this series is propping me up like i'm soggy cardboard and the next one isn't out until fucking July and I just don't know what I'm gonna do without these idiots until then.
#can't believe this series was a reddit suggestion that actually worked out#sounds fucking stupid on paper#and im over here trying not to cry about it#about a man in heart covered boxers and a persian show cat and their very feral pet raptor#everyone always has such cool and trendy emotional support media material#meanwhile mine is This#anyway every go listen to the Dungeon Crawler Carl books because Jeff Hays is a goddamn national treasure#and he can narrate the FUCK out of these books#dungeon crawler carl
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⡠Archmage Tethry Ikos âˇ
#my art#artists on tumblr#illustration#digital art#DnD#dungeons and dragons#homebrew#ttrpg#orignal character#ocs#my ocs#drow#Tethry#Setting: Heim#I wasn't sure about posting this with no context because this guy has a LOT of context#but i have no idea how to sum things up in a way that a) won't be an essay or b) sound fucking stupid#so uh#enjoy this purple man i guess?#I'm still trying to figure out exactly how to design that cloak cause it has some importance#but i just wanted to get his face down on paper#so here he is#Archmage (regretfully)#Professor of arcane dialects#and reluctant global posterboy for 'modern' arcane advancement#I'll maybe probably talk more about Tethry and his role in this setting later but yeah#i have no idea where to even begin
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forgive me my demons but i see this take so much and it drives me a little crazy . c!Sam is stupid, obviously. He has no self-awareness, he somehow completely misses on the fact that his actions have social ramifications, he has a sense of entitlement a mile high and thinks that everyone automatically should fall in line and agree with his authority just because he decides that he has it. he navigates conversations with the grace of a wrecking ball because he assumes that everyone will agree with him being In The Right and therefore doesn't actually go for much more convincing half the time than "do what i say or you'll end up locked up in an inescapable prison." his moral compass is a roulette wheel and his justifications incomprehensible.
but at the same time, c!Sam is far from unintelligent. like, not just anyone was going to CREATE and then RUN pandora's fucking vault. he made a world eater ?? if there's like anyone on the server that could reasonably create shit to cause mass destruction across the server other than like the literal fucking nukes, then yeah it'd be him, see the world eater again. sure, he makes the craziest fucking assumptions off the fact that he's Right And Justified And The Ultimate Authority And Everyone Should Agree With That, but he's also able to lie and manipulate and gaslight and coerce and threaten pretty much without breaking a sweat if he ever deems doing so necessary for his own goals, and it's not like the methods by which he does so are like, all that clumsy either. like people absolutely bought his whole deal early on in the prison arc, believing him to be a well-meaning, burdened Warden doing Whatever It Takes for the good of the server, which did in large part have to do with how his character talked about the prison to others and such, etc. just because c!sam is crazy bonkers and expects his ex to forgive him chopping their arm off doesn't mean that he's completely incapable of being pretty damn convincing at some points.
and like, even more importantly, his being dumb really didn't make him ANY less intimidating. i'd argue that it made him A LOT WORSE, honestly! just because his moral bullshit is twisted up in knots doesn't mean that he's any less dangerous for it. c!sam is, honestly, from the top of my head, one of the most casual about being violent on the server, purely because he believes he has a Right to it. he believes that people owe him obedience by virtue of who he is. he threw several people into pandora's vault WITHOUT LIKE, ANYONE KNOWING just because he decided that they deserved to be put in prison. he kidnaps a toddler??? c!Sam really doesn't bend himself in half trying to justify things according to someone else's moral system; as he literally does in that one scene with c!Bad during the stream where they investigated Sam Bucket, he literally just. is the epitome of the guy that lets himself do shit because he has a self-written permit that says i do what i want. the only thing getting in the way of c!sam's bullshit is c!sam, and i think that people honestly chronically overestimate how much he holds himself back from horrific violence. he stabbed a teenager to Make A Point about his authority? he repeatedly threatens hannah, one of his own employees, because of things she did while being mind controlled--and then like, uses this to excuse himself of? workplace harassment? in the stream after techno escapes with dream, he literally MAKES UP A REASON to be really fucking angry at dream and then threatens TO TORTURE HIM over it. when new people joined the server he would threaten them with a sword for asking questions about the prison in a way that seemed too 'dream sympathetic.' and he regularly tells people that he would commit all the atrocities again, including ponk, because he's entirely 100% convinced that everything he does is justified?
and a lot of the stuff people hold against him, like. sure, his plan to contain technoblade didnt work, but it SURE DID WORK BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE THAT TRIED, DIDNT IT? like techno would've been decently screwed if he didn't have a statis chamber set up. and well, the situation with dream speaks for itself--he was stuck in there for ten months. a lot of what people attribute to c!Sam's stupidity really does very little if anything to make him less scary--less effective, maybe, but for every time his moral bullshit gets in the way of him getting something that he wants there's probably a few other times you can find where his ability to justify himself out of anything makes him do something fucking ridiculous . anyway i dont even have a point to all of this except c!sam is scary as fuck bro
#c!Sam critical#c!Sam neg#like he's bonkers.#also like the times he fails are like well his TNT plot didnt work against the eldritch egg like that's HIS fault#and then stuff like well he let tommy die like that was just about stupidity and had nothing to do with him showing the fuck off#i feel like he gets underestimated a lot in fandom lmao which like. i mean.#honestly c!sam's victim complex 'oo i had to do it im not a bad guy i just didn't have a choice' copium is off the damn charts#so it's a little funny to see i think the way his pathetic paper bagisms end up reflected in fandom attitudes about him#also people way underestimate c!sam's ability to manipulate like for real#just because he's weirdly and terrifyingly earnest at the craziest moments because he thinks he sounds perfectly normal#while saying like the craziest bullshit you've ever heard in your life#doesnt make him incapable of lying and shit when he thinks he has to#anyway#i love him your honor
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#ay. tomorrow might b the day i face the music#which is to say. i tell my advisor how fucked i am. i mean. ill spin it so it doesn't sound so bad#its just that ive told him like 2 weeks in a row that id send him my edited preproposal and i have not bc im too afraid to start reading#papers related to my project. which is frustrating. and like the thing is. and i kno ive said it before and i kno im not a fucking idiot#i can read papers and i can even understand what theyre broadly saying. but thats it.#zero critical thinking. zero insight. i use all my tiny fucking brain space to try to understand the words on the pages#and even then it only forms this broken fucking image of whats being said. like u dont understand. i used to struggle with writing papers bc#i couldnt fucking connect what i was saying from one paragraph to the next when i was the one doing the fucking writing.#what the fuck am i doing here? and again. im not stupid. i can follow the information if its fucking said out loud but thats not how this#works. and it just feels like sometimes there's a limit to what you're capable of and im at that fucking limit. the undergrads in my lab#have more ability to comment on papers than i do. its so fucking frustrating and i just have to live with knowing itll never get any easier#so what the fuck can i do other than drop out? theres no god damn way im gonna pass a comprehensive exam. not unless i buckel down and break#myself in half to try to retain all the information i need to. which requires that i read so many god damn papers that i cant fucking read.#just. why tf did i pick a career path where my suffering is inherent to a huge part of my job? i feel like ive consistently chosen to take#the hard path in life and ive finally stumbled too far from what is possible for me#so well see what comes out of my mouth tomorrow when i have my weekly meeting. i just feel like its my last semester#i feel like this is it. i just need someone to fucking hire me. bc everytime my lab mate mentions something abt#my project down the line or talks abt future conferences i should attend. im just like. its a nice idea but that's not happening. im just#at the end of the line and it sucks#unrelated
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and then an overwhelming sense of dread apear.
#finished my last exam for this year YAY YIPPEE YAHOO ETC. but also now we wait for if i pass or not DREAD FEAR WARINESS ETC.#which i rlly don't think i will like. did not feel good abt the 1st exam period felt worse abt the 2nd and this one is like.....idk idk...#pretty confident abt the books part of the exam bc i KNOW i got everything on that correct but the thing is it was an oral exam and i was#stumbling over my words so bad + my voice was quivering i could hear it. hoping they don't count that as minus points but for the speech#thing i also had to do 2day they DO include how your voice sounds when you speak and like stammering and such in the final point count so#like. what if it's the same there.....ALSO they include use of gesturing to emphasize what you're saying and CORRECT EYE CONTACT in the#final point count. which. i don't have a problem with gesturing & i had a piece of paper in my hands so at least i wasn't too bad on that#front but when it comes to eye contact it's only flitting eyes or unnerving stare with me and nothing in between so i'm completely fucked i#that regard.#r.txt#WHATEVER it's done now. stupid ass weird rules WHO CARES if i don't have correct usage of eye contact what even is correct usage of eye#contact?????? like HOW am i supposed to know what the quote correct amount unquote is man. ALSO WHO GIVE A SHIT.#anyway going 2 luxembourg with my family for two weeks on august 5th probably. maybe sooner maybe later. we're going hiking + camping âşđ˛đŁ#but the hiking is mostly done without backpacks and the camping is gonna be in campings. camping places. however english calls it.#which is a little less fun but also easier. but also less fun. but ANYWAY we're going on vacation and my final exam is done so no more#stress đŞđĽłđđŁđĽâź (<- guy who's SO gonna be still having stress until the results come in. and then some afterwards. yay 4 me đđ)
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smashing the bottle on the floor because what do you mean I have to start over, i'm in rehabilitation for a limb I didn't even lose,
#i don't have the time or patience for this stupid fucking experience davinci resolve#i'm supposed to keep on living with these stupid fucking thoughts and ideas floating in my head and i can't even throw them up on paper#lock the doors because if i catch anybody loitering out on the street i'm gonna fucking tear you limb from limb with my bare teeth and hand#it's fine#i'm so emotionally constipated and I can't even vent my frustrations through creating media i'm gonna join the circus#i'm gonna fucking smash a keyboard over someone's head#i'm going to down an entire bottle of tequila with the same sound looping 12 seconds over and over
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so tired of being a shitty bandaid for my parents' loneliness. like have u ever considered you passed your curse to me and some days i feel so lonely it's like i can't breathe around the emptiness in my chest????
#my dad is like#you can't just be in your room all the time then what's the point of you living here if ill be sitting here all alone then#and im like bhai what#mom also says this to me she always wanted to sit and rant and she used to say you never talk to me#both of these people don't even fucking get it that they're not even interested in me listening to me#mom just wants a sounding board for her venting and dad just wants someone to pretend everything is okay and happy all the time and#the only important things in life is the immediate present and food and making money and stuff#i swear this is why i feel so ????? about myself my identity like no i can't describe myself#because there is no myself there is just a white sheet of paper where people can write whatever they want#im so tired man#why can't they just go and live with each other and leave us kids out of it đđ#like i genuinely am getting teary eyed about such a small thing but god. i want to have my own life so bad. im sick of feeling all these#complicated emotions guilt and anger and pity and obligation and duty like just god pls fuck off#people my age are so fucking mature and put together than me so confident so clear about their path#have friends partners breakups parties just so many new memories#and im just stuck.#and im fine with it now because i get it studying is really important and this is quite basic requirement to be perfect at#atleast my syllabus to survive in this industry#but then. let me do that only. please don't make me pretend to like you like spending time with you and everything#ive hated you for like. idk 14 whole years. since the first time you hit mom in front of me#i remember it so well like my childhood broke that day you slammed her into a wall for some stupid fight and her hair was all messy and#untied and you shouted so loud i thought surely everyone can hear. and then you left to roam around the city at night with your friends#i remember this because my mom and my sister sent me to check up on you with the excuse of a painting of a parrot that i had made#i didn't understand anything back then#but yeah fuck you fuck you fuck you for being so fucking delusional thinking i love you or something#ive prayed to god that you die and i still do#it would directly mean 4 people being happy#anyway#dni#this was meant to be fun and short lol fuck
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every day is a battle to not beat myself up over every mistake and assume that everyone looks down on me cuz iâm new to this job. iâm getting there but oh my god is it a struggle
#entered a data point wrong this morning cuz i was in a hurry and a coworker mentioned it#i scrambled to correct it like oh god oh fuck oh god oh fuck#teaching myself how the program we use works on the fly cuz i didnât remember if anyone showed me how to edit past entries or not#and didnât wanna sound stupid by asking for help#and then when i let her know âhey i fixed that thingâ and she was like oh wow really? thank you! i was gonna take the opportunity to show#you how itâs done but obviously you figured it out on your own. good job!#and iâm sitting there feeling like [laminated paper wobble sound]
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honestly funny the sheer amount of posts ive seen making fun of the tortured poets department as a title by people are operating under the assumption that taylor herself is being 100% serious with it like if you even just listen to the title track you'd know she means to be tongue in cheek about it. i don't think "we're modern idiots" is a good line* but it does very clearly speak to her self-critique regarding the way she finds comfort in viewing herself especially at that tumultuous time in her personal life.
of course it's not 100% ironic either, it is true to how she felt/feels but i don't think that negates any of the self awareness re her romantic relationships and certain coping mechanisms.
contextually it makes a lot of sense, not even taking into account the ways in which her celebrity fits into it which i know can be annoying to hear her (and others) talk about which i do understand lol. but i do think its disingenuous to act like the complexities of what comes with her level of fame is something that is like. not meaningful at all to discuss even though her self awareness of her own privilege can be extremely frustrating. it would be strange if it never came up and i think people would be mad about it if it didn't
*it actually it kinda annoys me beyond it sounding bad but thats another topic re the contrast between her romanticization of the chelsea motel/that era and her effort to de-mythologize her own life to herself but yeah whole different post and also idk if my thoughts on it are accurate to what she's trying to convey/actually felt. still would be a bad line either way but yeah
#also to the people who are like shes not a poet. fucking obviously đ shes making a comparison between two similar types of art and using a#well known concept of the tortured poet to talk about her own life who gives a shitttttt you wouldnt if you werent mad at her already like#truly a stupid take.#my posts make me sound not as smart as i do in like papers and shit sorry you get my stream of conciousness takes
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iâm not yet fully sure how to annunciate this but satine kyrze in clone wars is written in such a way that the writers misogyny is inextricable from her character for me and itâs very hard to like her or hate her or really cohere what she could have been. like the relationship that damara has to hussieâs racism in homestuck but without the handmaid. maybe itâs my own thing but all portrayal of her positive or negative falls flat to me bc itâs so removed from what her character is or itâs too fucking sexist to stomach
#satine kryze#itâs hard to explain but like:#theyâve basically made âoh this ideology sounds good on paper but is unsustainableâ#into a character#they do this by oversimplifying an ideology#not thinking particularly hard about the ramifications of her actions#making her set dressing for obi wan every time sheâs on screen#then when sheâs captured sheâs portrayed as almost naive? despite her age and experience?#like as if women being overly idealistic and irresponsible rulers wasnât loaded#itâs not like they set her up as an individually flawed person#because they barely set her up as a person at all!#and then sheâs fridged for obi wan#then people are like âhey her ideals are a bit fuckedâ#which makes sense!#but then theyâre like âbecause sheâs trying to do a cultural genocide of mandalore or sheâs too stupid to understand the consequencesâ#âof her own actionsâ#which also suck and are almost always sexist#iâve seen fic that basically says âshut up the men are talkingâ#uncritically#this isnât super well phrased bc itâs like 1am but i was trying to look through bo katanâs tag and was so fed up by the misogyny#also i hope the damara comparison makes sense#me tag#star wars
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hi! psychology student here!
TL;DR: adhd isnt real, its the goddamn phones. /j (While the "adhd" brain might have memory issues, these symptoms have much more to do with the enviroment in the current year than having adhd /srs)
disclaimer: This is from the top of my head, using common language to refer to academic topics, and not properly sourced and researched, so i encourage further readings on the topic! dont just trust stuff you read online!
i don't think adhd really has that much to do with these symptoms.
While, sure, the structure of the brain we typically associate with what we call "adhd" might have a higher chance of having short-term memory difficulties, it is massively exacerbated by the enviroment (including people, geographical location, things, habits, objects, sounds, etc) around you! sad to say guys, it is the damn phones.
Well, not just the damn phones, but theyre big on it. Usually, """"neurodiverse"""" brains have a higher (or lower, but im focusing on the higher) perception of stimuli, like when autistic people have trouble with sounds/smells/touch/etc/all of the above... So how the fuck do you expect us to survive and be normal in current year? Go outside, there are thousands of things happening, very loud things! cars! billboards! people! And thats a small part of it!
we are all fucking stressed all the goddamn time. Capitalism. The current state of things. And stress eats away at your brain, the more stressed someone is, i assure you, the dumber they act.
and about the fucking phones, theyre made to train you to use it, we're literally pavloved to click our lives away on these things. The colors, the constant pouring of content where you only scroll, its stealing your autonomy and preventing brain activity. If you want to gain muscle, you need to train it, you have to use it enough until it grows, and we dont use our brains, simple as that. We are made to not use our brains, its designed that way.
Also, brain and body are linked- and by linked i mean dont fuckin separate them, our consciousness doesnt live in our brains, we are our bodies, our whole existance is defined by the body we are. Humans explore the world through our senses, we need to exercise the ones we have to have a full experience. And guess what senses being online uses... touch and vision, usually. You dont feel anything besides plastic and glass, dont smell anything besides whats around you (even if you do, notice how your senses are dulled while on the phone?).
So that "brain fog" is probably not the adhd. careful not to explain yourself through a label a pharmaceutical company put on you to sell drugs.
aaand im going to go back to doomscroling... still havent got to the part of the course where they teach you to fix it lol ( But like. Exercise, not using short-form, eating nutrients you need and mindfullness (away from your phone) really really reeeaally do help. )
the curse of adhd:
i will remember with absolute clarity, when the thought strikes me that i have a text to send someone, that this is the fourth time in three days i've attempted to send this specific text
i will forget, in the time it takes me to pick up my phone, that i picked it up intending to send a text
#im brasilian im not fucking correcting my spelling in fuckin english goddamn english. language made of tissue paper and spit i tell ya.#you know how stupid it sounds to pronounce colonel like kernal i know you do and you should be ashamed. /j
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Danny Kills the Joker AU
Danny is on the run in gotham, as you do in dpxdc fics. His parents are dead and he is trying to stay out of Vlad's custody. Gotham has plenty of ectoplasm to hide his ecto signature. It also has a high enough population of homeless people that no one would even notice Danny just showing up.
He's been living rough in gotham, mostly sticking to Crime Alley and The Narrows, sleeping in abandoned buildings or in relatively clean parts of the sewer system. He eats what he can find and does his best never to be seen.
Not good enough since he along with like 30 other street kids get picked up by joker goons and tied up. Joker is planning an explosive party for the city to watch and he needed guests. Joker literally set up bombs of joker gas around the city that will go off and send the entire city into pandemonium, killing millions. The only way to stop the bombs is to kill his guests (homeless kids from Crime Alley) which the city can vote on. Kill themselves or kill kids.
Danny is sitting at the edge of the group, listening as Joker televises his new plan to the entire city.
He really, really hates clowns.
He is also not gonna let this guy kill all of these kids. He may not be a hero anymore but those protection instincts didnt die with his parents.
And also fuck that clown.
He phases through his bonds, and then starts asking the various kids to borrow their hat, gloves, and scarf. Gotham street kids take one look at this out of town kid and mentally wish him luck while planning out his funeral. They keep on acting terrified because as stupid as this kid is being, they're not snitches either.
Danny puts on the borrowed clothes to hide his face and hair. He can't be identified, or Vlad is gonna be on his ass tomorrow. Once fully covered he gets up and into view of the camera. The Joker notices him, turns around to laugh and jeer at him. Probably shoot him for being impolite and interrupting him. Danny doesnt even pause just walks right up to the clown and coldcocks him.
Based on the sound of bones snapping Danny admits he might have punched a little too hard. Danny checks the Jokers pulse and immediately panics. Danny has Batman levels of fear around killing and he is panicking about becoming Dan.
"Holy Shit I killed him!" He says, to the entire city because the camera is still rolling.
Cue:
Danny running for his life, trying to hide away from his fear and guilt.
Red Hood becoming like his dad and drawing up mental adoption papers
Harley Quinn also drawing up adoption papers, paper ones, while Poison Ivy changes their home's 'no boys allowed' banner to 'son boy allowed'
Jokers goons trying to find Danny to kill him for killing their boss
City wide pandemonium as the jokers death is confirmed and people are partying in the streets, the mayor is planning on giving the street kid who did it the key to the fucking city
The batfam trying to find Danny to protect him from Jokers Goons (Bruce is third in line for custody not that he knows he is gonna have to fight both Harley and Jason for the honor)
The crime alley kids are still not snitching on the kid who saved them. Anyone who asks them about Danny only respond with 'what are you a cop? Fuck off pig'
Vlad Masters, as someone who has been punched by Danny, immediately recognizes the punch and flies to Gotham to find his wayward 'son'.
Vlad even meets with Brucie Wayne to ask for help in finding Danny. Bruce gets bad vibes from Vlad and is even more invested in finding Danny. The boy has dark hair, blue eyes, and a tragic orphan backstory. Its fate!
Danny meanwhile is hiding in some sewer somewhere breathing into a paper bag as he panics about becoming a world ending threat.
#danny phantom#dpxdc#dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#danny kills the joker#danny and bruce are in a competition over their guilt complexes#impossible to tell who will win#jason is like 20 and ready to be a father#batman#jason todd#harley quinn#dc joker
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#sometimes u volunteer to do a paper for lab meeting and choose something that's like just above you head#just enough to b like: god dammit i should kno this. im gonna sound so fucking dumb trying to explain this#bc my lab mates 1000% know more on the topic than me đ but ya kno. so it goes.#i should have picked an easier paper. no i shouldnt say that. ive had fun with this one but i wish it didn't make me feel so stupid#i just think the D1 protein is really neat. and chl f uses 2 of... paralogs. one of which is real fucking old#its just really cool how with genetics u can look back in time at a mess that became what we see today#ugh. i should sleep. i still have lots to read abt before 11 tomorrow. thank christ my doctors appointment got moved#unrelated
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LOVE IT WHEN YOU CALL ME LOVERâJJK MEN.
â. jjk men showing you how much they love you. | wc. 2k+
tags. fem!reader, window sex, possessive behavior, mirror sex, oral sex, public sex, pregnancy, fingering, praise kink, size kink
featuring. gojo, nanami, geto
masterlist
⏠GOJO
He doesnât think youâve looked more breath-taking than you do right then, humming softly to the music on the radio while painting your toenails, the last stretch of daylight kissing your exposed knees through the window. Youâre so lost in your own little world that you donât notice him watching you.
The important emails on his phone go unanswered, saved for another day when youâre not there to distract him. You stretch your smooth legs to inspect your work and glance across the living room to give him one of those soft smiles that sends warmth through his middle.
âWhat do you think?â you ask, little sunflower yellow toes flexing on the coffee table.Â
âTheyâre pretty, baby.â
Another smile stretches across your face, that full lower lip caught between your teeth. âYou think so?â
âPositive.â His phone lies forgotten on the cushion beside him, and he leans back to make room for you. âCome here.â
His eyes make a lazy trail up from your delicate ankle bone to the soft slope of your collarbone that peeks out from one of his t-shirts as you walk towards him, getting his fill until his fingers itch to touch and retrace the invisible path.Â
Gojo canât help it. Heâs struck by the sight of you.
He wishes he could trap the shocked and delighted sound you make when he pulls you into his lap, keep it tucked away in the untainted nooks and crannies for him to return to later. A little melody on repeat for the days he feels undeserving of such sweet things, how he treads the fine line of corrupting that wide-eyed innocence you have of the world.
Still. Still, the truth is, heâs a little greedy, and he doesnât really care how bad of a person that makes him.
Everyone looks up to him in some way. Nobody ever called him a saint.Â
Gojo works out more of those soft soundsâpressing you against the chilly, tall windows in the living room, fist in your hair, and his mouth attached to the long column of your throatâthat make his mouth go dry. Your back arches to ease the way he fucks up into you, tits brushing up against the glass, and he loves how the distant city lights below shimmer around you like a halo.
A high-pitched whimper, sharp breaths fogging over the window. ââToru people can see.â
He doesnât think heâll ever tire of how your soft and silky little cunt sucks him inâwrapped up all warm and wet around his cockâcursing under his breath when he tells you he doesnât care. Youâre his, anyway.Â
âLet them see,â he grunts into your neck, teeth catching along your skin before licking at the vulnerable spot above your pulse. âLet them see how I fuck you because they canât have you.â
Gojo can barely control himself at the mere idea that anyone would ever think they could. Heâll be the last and only one to know how you turn into a fucking vice when he hits particularly deepâhow you shake like a leaf, legs coltish, after he makes you cum hard.Â
⏠GETO
It feels like the epitome of terrible days: from the tomato stain on your skirt to your boss forcing deadlines down your throat and surprising Suguru at work only to find a pretty, willowy brunette sitting on the corner of his desk, her hand resting on a stack of graded papers, and fluttering her long lashes at him.Â
The final nail in the coffin (a stupid nail, but a hammered-down nail nonetheless) is how she laughs and touches his arm, and Suguru doesnât brush her off. He actually laughs back, all perfectly straight teeth on display and eyes crinkling at the corners. One of those heart-stopping smiles stretching across his face that you foolishly thought were all yours.Â
Suddenly, you wonder if it was out of obligation that made him compliment you that morning in your dressâlook at you, a kiss to your cheek, Iâm going to fucking ruin youâa perfunctory greeting after being together so long (like making coffee or picking out paint), to make you feel better, or if he meant itâ
A tap with sticky fingers to your cheek. âCâmon, watch.âÂ
You feel like youâre looking from the outside in, a spectator with a front-row seat that has your breath catching in your throat at the sight of his spit-slick chin and cheeks resting against the crease where thigh meets hip. He gives you a syrupy grin that tightens something in your stomach like a screw.Â
âNot me,â he says, words laced with amusement.Â
Hesitantly, your gaze trails up from his to the floor-length mirror perched in front of the bed, and what you see has your fingers sinking into the sheets.Â
You can hardly pull your eyes away from how your leg looks draped across his broad, muscular back, making you look so small even though you sit above him. And itâs like Suguru knows what youâre seeing because his grin grows wider.Â
âSee, look how perfect you are. That woman in the mirror is so fucking pretty, I canât believe I get to tell everyone sheâs mine.â His thumb parts you open for his mouth. âWhy would you think you look otherwise, huh?â
âIâŚdonât know,â you whisper, head a fuzzy mess of weak excuses that evaporate before they even have a chance to make it onto your tongue.
âHm, thatâs not a good enough answer.âÂ
Your hips twitch when he noses at your clit.Â
âAwe, I bet that feels good, huh? Iâm gonna show you what happens when you talk bad about my pretty baby,â then he sucks it into his mouth, making you squeal.
He canât blame you for squeezing your eyes shut at the slick, hot pressure dragging through your foldsâshaky fingers tightening in Suguruâs long, dark hair. It feels equally like everything and not nearly enough until he suddenly pulls away, taking that jittery feeling in your belly with him.
âWhyâd youââ
âIf you look away, I stop.â He chuckles lightly at the little pout you give him before his lips suck at the tender spot near the crease of your thigh, âso watch.â
⏠NANAMI
After lunch, he drags you across the street where thereâs a park for him to set up a picnic blanket under a tree. Kento rests his head on your lap, slipping an arm around your waist and rubbing the sore spot in your lower back from being on your feet for too long.Â
Itâs all very innocent: him kissing your round pregnant belly, you running your fingers through his soft hair and talking about the latest work gossip.Â
You hum when you feel his fingers crawl up your thigh, slowly at first and with no destination, just soft, aimless circles here and there, until the calloused pad of his thumb skirts over the front of your underwear, making you jerk with a small squeak.
âKento,â you giggle, fingers tightening in his hair.Â
He smiles at the scandalized look spreading across your face and leans forward to press another kiss against your stomach.
"Do you trust me?" he asks, hand pushing up your dress.Â
You glance around the park to see if anyone is paying attention to the two of youâan elderly couple feeding the ducks frozen peas by the pond, a mother and father playing with their giggling daughter in the grass, college kids throwing a frisbee, all far enough away to be out of earshot (but thatâs not the real problem here)âbefore you look back at your husband.Â
âW-what?â you sputter, wide-eyed realization taking over.
He presses another open-mouthed kiss to your thigh. âDo you trust me?â
A soft whine slips past your teeth, the hand not in his hair curling into the blanket. âBut everyone will notice because IâmâIâmââ
(A beached whale. An air balloon. A carnival-sized melon. You get the gist.)
âGorgeous.â He smooths a hand over your bump, open-fondness radiating across his features, the subtle hint of possessiveness there making you shiver. âYou look so fucking gorgeous with my baby growing inside you. Let me take care of you.â
âB-butââ
Everything else melts away to the pulsing heat between your legs and your husband groaning from the wetness he finds there. Your shaky thighs fall open wider when his fingers hook under the edge of your underwear (unflattering things worn for comfort over sexual appeal), pulling them aside to run his fingers through your slick seam.Â
Pregnancy brain clouds your judgment, and before you can think twice about your actions, how you definitely shouldnât let Kento eat you out in the middle of a public park, you nod your head.Â
His lips ghost over the tender flesh of your upper thigh. "I need to hear you say it."
Itâs a low and shaky yes that has his fingers finally sinking into you to the third knuckle, steadily pumping in and out of you. You buck down onto his hand, trying to bite back the moan threatening to alert everyone in the park of the head under your skirt.
âYouâre going to cum for me, just like this,â Kento tells you, voice muffled by a layer of powder blue cotton. âAlright, darling?âÂ
#gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo x you#gojo satoru smut#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#geto x you#geto smut#geto x reader#nanami x you#nanami smut#nanami x reader#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#.things i write
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SWEET RELIEF - C.S
âŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚ.. â â
âŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚ
Chris sturniolo x fmreader
summary: Chris canât help but get a bit worked up while on a tutoring study call with you, when you realise what heâs doing, you only pushing him further to the edge.
content warning: male masturbtion; dirty thoughts; praise kink
word count: 2.8k
ŕźśâ˘ââŕ¨âĄŕ§âââ˘ŕźś
Chris was a little embarrassed with how fast he had picked up the phone call from you, not to mention the blush that had spread across his cheeks and his quickly paced heartbeat when he heard your sweet voice ring through the speakers.Â
âHey, Chris!â You smiled as you spread your small pile of assessments and study papers across your desk to get yourself prepared. This had been a regular thing on Wednesdays and Saturdays for the past two months. You guys would set up a phone call together as you would help him study as Chris was falling behind in classâŚa lot. You guys had to do it over the phone as both houses were always so busy due to Chrisâs brothers and your family always occupying your living spaces, making it difficult to have privacy and quiet to help him focus and bring his grades up. Therefore, you resulted in two easy phone calls across the week, which Chris always enjoyed a little too much.Â
Chris loved that you could never see him and what he was doing at the sound of your voice over the phone. The sweet ring of it through the speakers. The way you ramble so passionately about the work. Yeah⌠he definitely liked having the privacy of his room for these calls more then heâd like to admit. Although he can never help but imagine what you looked like, what you were doing. Fuck⌠heâs been on the call for no more than ten second and heâs already getting himself worked up.Â
âChrisâŚ?â He heard you voice agin. Fuck that voice.Â
âYeah... Iâm here, hey y/n.â He couldnât help the smile that rose onto his lips hearing hear giggle at his slow usual response.Â
âOkay well glad you're here,â you say readying the paper you had recently got giving by your teacher, on to the top of the pill of books you had been working on, âwhy donât you fine the paper that mr Hudson gave us today and we will work through that one today, yeah?â You say cutely but trying not to talk so fast so Chris could take in the information.Â
âYeah, yeah sureâŚâ he buries his way through his overflowing piles of unfinished homework to find the paper that was given to him today by his teacher âwhy did he give us the paper today, anyway?â Chris huffs, flipping to the first page that you wanted to start working on.Â
âI have no idea, itâs not like we donât already get enough work given to us on Mondays and Fridays, but now on Wednesdays too? Itâs getting a bit intense at this point!â
Chris hums in agreement, loving the way you get worked up about things. However, once you were done with your small rant, you let out a sign that was so quiet only the most observant person would notice it, lucky for you, Chris was that person. As you made the noise Chris felt a familiar warm feeling in his lower stomach, just imagining you making that noise in a very different scenarioâŚ
âDid you see jenny today?â You interrupted his quickly drifting dirty thought, referring to girl who passes every class, not using her smarts but her body instead, fucking her way to good grades.Â
âNo, why? What was she doing this time?â Chris asked slowly, trying to calm his erratic heartbeat and suppress his dirty thought of you.Â
âWoah Iâm surprised you didnât see her! She was practically pushing her tits out of her very tiny top to try and get out of this paperâŚ. practically had all the guys drooling,â you huffed. Youâd always been quite jealous of Jennifer. She could literally get any guy she wanted and could always get out of these stupid papers. It was irritating to people like you who tried their very hardest in their schoolwork and seem to go zero appreciation for it, when all jenny does is gossip, do her obnoxiously babyish laugh and pop a tit, therefore having the whole classroom wrapped around her finger. It was pathetic.
âNah, guess i donât really care that much about her,â Chris was very aware of Jennyâs usual inappropriate behaviour, yet he couldnât pull his eyes away from you all through that class. He was sat near the back of the class, so he had a good view of his surroundings and could easily see you sat a few rows in-front of him, at the perfect angle so her couple see you left side perfectly. Chris simply couldnât understand how anyone could pay attention in that class knowing that you were in there, not jenny but you.Â
Your short denim mini shirt that accentuated you ass and hips so perfectly and highlighting your legs. However, to keep yourself warmer and seem more modest, you through a knitted sweater over the top, making Chrisâs eager to rip it off and see what you hid beneath the layers of warm wear. God, if there was nobody else in that classroom, he would not hesitate you lift you up on the desk and kiss up your legs to your perfect thighs and up your body. He would make sure to take perfect care of you, bring his lips underneath your sweater and bring his hand to you perfectly round and covered tits.Â
Full, he could barely take it anymore. He could feel his harder member quickly growing underneath his get sweats, but he didnât want to stop. No⌠he couldnât stop himself.
âHuh, thats surprising, i couldâve sworn that the guys next to me literally had dribble on his chin, it was crazy.â You laughed.Â
Fuck that laugh. Chris brought his hand up to his crotch and felt where he had grown harder just thinking of you. He began to palm himself, trying to relieve the growing soreness between his legs.Â
"We should get started now." You unintentionally break his train of thought, as he gulps, silently cursing at himself. "Because I you barely understood what was going on it that class."
"Uh, yeah." Chris coughed, forcing himself to focus. "What did you want to start with?"Â
You voice begins to drift into an explanation of what was said at the beginning of the class, only worded in a simpler way, yet Chris could barely take in any of this information. You speak so innocently, brows furrowed, as Chris furrows his own for an entirely different reason.Â
He continues to palm his dick through his pants while your voice was sending small electric jolts through him. All the way down to his dick, which has begun to strain painfully against his pants beneath his hand. Christ, i canât actually be doing this right now-he thinks to himself. He licked his lips, quickly responding to what you were saying with a hum and an "ah, that makes makes more sense."Â
Chris doesn't mean to drown out your words. Because he's listening. But more so to the hilt of your voice, and how it would sound much breathier, as you gazed up at him. One of his fantasies had you on your knees, teasingly licking at his cock, as your devious eyes held his. He had orgasmed extremely quickly, multiple times, when he found this imagine in his head.Â
âSo thats basically the first part,â you continued to explain, unaware and completely oblivious to Chrisâs hand rubbing at himself on the other end of the line. Â
He wonât do more. He canât, this is just so wrong of him JustâŚrelieve a hint of tension. You continued to speak, and your words began to sound like something he wished he could grab, as his hand tightened on his bulge, his rubbing growing messy. His breathing had grown heavier, but he covered it up by saying âyesâs and ânoâs, answering your questions.Â
âSorry, Iâm rambling. Did you have any questions?â You ask, feeling as if Chris wasnât getting everything he needed out of your words. He had to spare a glance at his incomplete work, scanning to see if heâd written down any problems, trying to remember if he had any. Because the only problem he could think of right now is how his over-the-clothes rubbing was doing little to satisfy his need.Â
His cock was now rock hard, it was torturous. His mind began to glaze over with lustful thought of you âIâI donât think so.â He mutters out, his fingers reaching into the waistband of his sweats and briefs, pulling his cock, which was now leaking with drops of pre-cum and the tip was a bright rosy, red, much like his cheeks.
He imagined the way you would touch him. Would you be gentle and slow, or would you edge him and make sure heâs extremely overstimulated as you milk him dry. Chrisâs breathing stutters as he strokes himself. The little hums you make when you think have begun to make his hips thrust up into his palm. His other hand had tightened around the sheet, praying that you canât hear him jerking off to you. Chris becomes lost in your tone as his cock twitches.Â
âChris?â You slowly ask, making his hips jolt at the utterance of his name from your lips, but he tries to keep his voice of some composure.Â
âYeah?â He had to press his lips together after a needy whimper nearly falling.Â
âAre youâŚokay?âÂ
Your question makes him halt, much to his cockâs dismay. âW-what?â
âYou sound⌠i donât know, out of breath?â You say, behind the line trying to think of why.
âReally, you think?â He hums with a small smirk on his face enjoying the uncertainty in your tone and how innocent you mind must have been.  You nod to yourself, but then you catch the smallest of sounds fall straight from Chrisâs lips. You had to be mistaken, as it had almost sounded like one full of pleasure that could have only been as a result of one thing...Â
Your mouth opened in shock as you realise. Heâs out of breath because heâsâŚ
âChris.â You say again, hearing a stuttering whimper from him before he tries to cover it up by asking âyes?â again. Â
âWhat are you doing?âÂ
Chris curses himself because you sound suspicious. âIâm studying obviously. Being tutored s-so well... by you.â He says, really forcing down his cockâs wanting to just ask you to keep talking so he could reach his orgasm, attempting to stop himself from stuttering his words, but he just couldnât help it.Â
âYouâre sure youâre good?â You asked unconvinced, as a small smirk rose to your lips.
âNo. No, Iâm all good, i swear.â He says, really forcing his words to sound normal, as he had slowly begun to stroke himself again, his cock angry.Â
âAh huh, yeahâŚokay,â you knew what you were going to do, this was going to be fun. âDid i tell you how good you looked today?â
Chrisâs eyes opened, looking at his phone slightly trying to keep a steady pace of his raging cock but if you were going down this road of compliments, he probably wouldnât be able to take it much longer.
âUh, n-no,â he stutters pathetically, somehow unaware of the game you were playing.Â
âWell, you did, your hairâŚwow. I could just run my hands through it! How do you always get it looking so soft?â You paused momentarily, hearing Chrisâs surprised whimper. âSorry thats kind of a goofy thing to sayâŚsorry.â You were basically just teasing him now, the basic matters of the studying gone.
âI- no i donât think its goofy. a-at allâŚâ his words are broken up by that heaving panting.
âGod. really? Youâre so sweet chrisâŚwow,â You hum, making Chrisâs hips thrust up into his hand, his legs having widened as you spoke.Â
âR-really?â His eyelids began to feel heavy again, wanted nothing more but to see the darkness and use it as a canvas to paint his dirty images of you in his mind.Â
âYeah, i mean youâre the literal sweetestâ you hum lightly, âyou always make sure i havea seat in class, you listen to me when i speak and when i help you i study, you defend me in-front of your friends! Youâre so sweet! Such a sweet, good boy for meâ you were practically grinning at this point.
Chris could have sworn that your words could have sent him spiralling over the edge.âI a-am?â He asked, almost to clarify that this was real, that you were actually saying this to him.
âWell of course, and youâre always so busy as well, yet you always make time for me in your busy schedule. You must be stressed a lot of the time. I could always help youâŚrelax sometime, relieve some of yourâŚtension.â You had lowered your voice now in order to have a more seductive tone to your voice now.
Chris chokes on a whimper as he places his hand over his mouth, still thinking you donât know. âMy tensionâŚ?â
âI mean, yeah⌠i could alway give you a massage, rub you down, you know Iâve been told I am very good at givingâŚmassages.â It was becoming blatantly obvious what you were doing now but Chris mustâve been blinded and in a lustful haze because he still seemed to be completely oblivious to what you were doing. Continuously pumping his dick eagerly and chasing his release.
The thought of you sat on top of him, rubbing all down him in order to relax him was definitely doing the opposite effect and only working him up more. Fuck. He had almost come from the thought of you taking care of him. the tone you had dropped to makes his hand quicken as his hips had begun to grind into his palm.
âYouâd do that for me?â Chris whined, only imaging what else you would do for him almost sent him over the edge.
âOf course, i would baby, you would tell me where it feels good before i drag my hands down your bodyâŚâ Chris let out a pathetic whimper at not only the simple thought but at the nickname as well. Baby? Baby??! Oh, my lord he was going absolutely feral at this point, âhowever, through your clothes it mind be hard to properly get that tension out.âÂ
Chris moans through his teeth, as his hips pathetically thrust at your words. âNo clothes?âÂ
âNo clothes.â You confirm. âWould that be, okay? I wouldnât want to make you uncomfortableâ â
âYes.â His answer was immediate, cutting you short. He coughs. âThat would be fine.âÂ
You grin. âGood. Because that way I could really relieve some tension. Iâd have to straddle you of course.â You pause to hear chrisâs heavy breathing and the faint sound of his hand gliding along his cock. âYou may even have to flip around, because Iâve heard that the most tension can be by your collarbones and neck.âÂ
Chris nearly orgasmed at the thought of you straddling him, as your hands wandered his body. âAs in straddling..my front?âÂ
âYeah, is that okay?âÂ
âUh huh.â He hums, his cock twitching with a soon need to release.Â
âI could give you that massage the next time we study.â You say, making chrisâs breathing quicken at the possible reality of all that. âI could come over to yours.âÂ
At this point he couldnât care how desperate he sounded. âYes. Please, come anytime.âÂ
âOr maybe you should cum?â You ask, your innuendo strong, as pleasure began to rock through chrisâs body.Â
âWâwhat?âÂ
âCome to my place, i know yours is always super hectic.â You play it off, listening to the wet sounds his cock was making as you could hear how close he was to his orgasm.Â
âFuckâŚyeah that sounds good, i-if youâre happy then s-so am iâŚâ he was no biting his own lip so hard he couldâve sworn he was drawing some blood. He now had his back so far arched up off of his bed and was practically fucking up into his own hand.Â
âSee, again, you are alway thinkingâŚof me,â oh he was definitely thinking of you, thats for sure, âyou are such a good boy.â And that did it. His orgasm wracked through him as quiet whimpers and moans left his lips his hips grinding into nothing. Wishing the air was you. He watched as the white strings of cum coated and stained his dark shirt.Â
âFuckâ he let out a relieved groan, now not even hiding the action that he had just did.Â
âMaybe next time we study i should just jerk you off instead,â
Chrisâs eyes widened at what you had said, before realising how blatantly obvious what he was doing was. You giggled once again hearing Chrisâs heavy breathes, pleased to know that it was you who had pushed him over the edge.Â
âFuck, you can do whatever you want to me,â Chris let out with a deep breathe.Â
Oh, you certainly wouldâŚ
ŕźśâ˘ââŕ¨âĄŕ§âââ˘ŕźś
A/n : thank you so much for reading, this is literally my 3rd time trying to post this because I keep making mistakes đđI really hope you enjoy and if there are any more mistakes pls lmk
ily my angels đ (especially @gamermattsgf)
#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo imagine#chris sturniolo x reader#smut#sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x you
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Would you consider writing a poly141 version of the babytrap universe? Completely understand if itâs not to your interest to write, but I would love to see that story play out in your delicious writing style :)
ohh, absolutely. i think the best way to do it would be to have poor reader, desperate for a family of her own, and making the stupid decision to hand her resignation into Price.
and then admitting, shyly, that there's no man in your life, just a donor waiting for you to sign the papers and make the deposit for the procedure. thanking him for everything he's done, of course; but you're excited for this new chapter in your life.
He accepts it. Sure. Smiles tightly, and says, "good luck." Calls a meeting after to discuss it with the rest of the team. Closed door. A little unusual, but nothing that immediately raises your hackles. You're too busy cleaning up your desk to really pay much attention to hushed whispers in Price's office. Happy to celebrate, too, when Johnny invited you out for drinks after. Tae say goodbye properly, he said, and looking back, you should have seen through the faux sadness draped over his brow. Picked up on the giddy excitement buzzing around him as he led you to the bar, as he offered to get you drinks. Handed you an open bottle. Tipping it back for you to drink more.Â
Keep goinâ, doe. Drink âer up.Â
Another one. Another. Your head swims. Kyle is there, hands warm on your waist, breath rippling across the sweat gathering on the nape of your neck.Â
âCâmon, birdie. Have a shot with me.â He coos, bringing the glass to your lips, chest glued to your spine. âCan't believe you want a baby. Fuck, birdie, that'sââ
Johnny murmurs something under his breath. You blamed the three glasses of whiskey sour (Price wouldn't let you have anything else) and a shot of tequila for why it sounded like,
hope it's mineâ
To the left of you, Ghost snorts under his breath. Shifts in the stool that creaks, whining under his weight. You blink through fog seeping into your head, this strange, syrupy torpor that bleeds into the corners of your vision, makes everything feel muted, far away, and turned to him with a pout.Â
He'd been acting strange ever since Price told him your plans. Quieter, somehow. Butâ
There.Â
Everywhere.Â
Your fixed shadow. Looming in the corners.Â
You make to ask him what the hell he's doing, why he's following you around, but the words slosh out in a tangle. Incompressible.
Ghost huffs. His gloved hand lifts, falls to your throat, holding you steady with his thumb digging shallowly into your pulse.Â
âCareful,â he mocks, dragging the word out like he was speaking to a misbehaving child. It bristles through you, but your tongue is thick. Liquid in your mouth. âGot a big night ahead oâyou yet, pet. Try not tâhurt yourself before I get to knock you up.â
Distantly, you think you hear Gaz say somethingâoi, mate, maybeâbut there's a shrill ringing in your ear that drowns it all out. A cotton spooling in your head. You blinkâfoolishlyâand lean into his palm, mouth dropping in surprise. Shock.Â
Horror.Â
âWhaâ?â
But it's too late, of course. What you thought were the comforting threads of a warm blanket spooling over your shoulders was the silken strands of a spider's web the whole time. Caught in their trap.Â
And then you come to with a warm weight pressed against your back, a thick, hairy arm slung around your shoulders. Trapping you tight against a warm, broad chest.
âWant a baby, mm?â your captain coos in your ear, humid breath tickling your skin. Dampening it slightly as he leans in close, lips pressed to the shellâa warm, wet heat that makes you trembleâand adds: âfine, love. Since you want one so badââÂ
An arm lashes out of the shadows dancing around the room; through the heavy haze, the fog in your head (the last thing you remember is being offered a drink by Johnny, another by Kyleâ), you struggle to make sense of what's happening around you as rough, dry fingers curl over your knee, prying your thighs apart:Â
ââthen we'll give it to you.â
You watch, dazed, dizzy, as cherryred knuckles slip down the valley of your spread legs, the ink on their thick fingers flexing, dancing, in the slip of pale moonlight until they curl into the hem of your panties, tugging the fabric roughly to the side.Â
The sudden swell of cold air on your exposed cunt makes you gasp. Your knees jerking, trying to fold together to hide yourself, preserve some modicum of modesty, but the hand on your flesh tightens. Prevents you from moving. It keeps you open for their gaze. Lets them all gawk at the wide knuckles pressed against the seam of your pussy. Flushed in the low light. Drippingâ
In the murk, someone groansâ
âShoulda told us sooner you wanted a fuckinâ baby, sweetâart. Woulda given you one sooner before y���had to go anâ do somethinâ so foolishââ
Foolish. Like paying for another man to put a baby inside of you when that privilege belongs to them. And them alone.
And reallyâ
You should have known better.
#theyre so competitive about it too :/#all eagerly trying their hardest to knock you up and then refusing to get a paternity test because thats *their* baby#a vicious cycle#poly 141 x reader#141 x reader#captain john price x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#kyle garrick x reader#johnny mactavish x reader
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