#sorry to all the Beckys out there

[born-to-riot]

Me: currently writing Azris high school au

(lol has anyone in this here parts heard of the show SKAM)

Pros: DRAMA

(“oh my god, seriously? Are we in high school right now?” YES BECKY we are)

Cons: it’s a high school au so I have to figure out what ages to make everyone with out my 24 year old ass feeling like a pedo

[stevens-pastrami-sandwich]

HAPPY 17TH ANNIVERSARY TO THE SHOW THAT CHANGED MY LIFE!! 🎉🥳🎂

So maybe I'm a bit late to the party.. but that's not important 🤫🫶

[sluckythewizard]

SHHH SH HEYYY HEY DONT TELL ANYONE BUT... ive been workin on smth since BITB came out..... itsa lil musical animatic involvin kian and becky.... ITS NO WHERE NEAR DONE YET but loooook look im puttin lil screenshots under the cut. its supposed to go along with Am I In Heaven? by King Gizzard n the Lizard Wizard. infact yknow what cmere come sit with be bc ALOT of songs from the 'IM IN YOUR MIND FUZZ' album makes me think about becky and kian. oh my god. those two make me so damn emotional. like Her and I was the first one to rly resonate with me, and EMPTY was another good one, all just stuff about. yknow LOVE!! doomed by the narrative yet burning SO SO brightly in its last moments, holding hands, playing music, THEY WERE SO IN LOVE WITH YOU THAT THE COPY OF THEM LOVED YOU, AND YOUR COPY LOVES THEM TOO. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL, CRUMBLING, BURNING, HISSING, SQUIRMING, MELTING, CLICKING LOVE STORY..

GET OVER HERE N SCREAM WITH MEEE I LOVE SCREAMING ABOUT THINGS

[the-bi-space-ace]

I wish it was socially acceptable to say ‘you hurt my feelings’ to your coworkers bc sometimes it’s not that I’m annoyed or stressed or anything like that it’s just that my feelings got hurt and I wish someone understood me better but everyone gets so uncomfortable when you’re honest about that stuff so I guess Becky’s email just pissed me off instead.

[alsaurus-loves-dean]

.

[magnifiico]

"Your majesty? If you may hold still for just a moment..." A genteel smile would quickly replace the contemplative gaze to which Geto had had been directing at Magnifico, as a single hand was raised up towards him then.

The hideous curse (That this sorcerer king curiously was not able to see) had so chosen to perch itself upon the man's shoulders would let out a horrified shriek, before it was siphoned into the very palm of his hand. Taking the form of a pitch black orb, Geto would offer it a brief glance before simply placing it away into the sleeve of his robes.

"There... do you feel better? Lighter? ... I'm sure it's easier now for you to breathe as well~"

@idyllicserendipity || hereweGO :3c

He thinks it rude at first.

After all, King Magnifico is in the middle of talking when the man speaks over him, and even if he has no other choice but to interrupt (Given the mighty breath the king takes in when he's forced to pause, he must have been saying quite a lot with very few breaks between), Magnifico temporarily wonders what could possibly be important enough. Important enough to interrupt a king, that is. A hand once gesturing emphatically with every syllable falls limp as he turns to meet Geto's somewhat distracted stare—Where is he looking?—but before Magnifico gathers the chance to lightly admonish the lack of courtesy . . .

He feels it as much as he hears it. A chilling shriek rips the brief quiet asunder, followed so shockingly fast by a sensation the king could only describe as . . . inexplicable relief. As if he himself was the one to have shouted his frustrations, expelled some pent-up bubbling beneath his skin, and perhaps deep in his gut. When he releases another exhale, it flows smoother. Heavier. As heavy as the weight once perched atop his shoulders that he hadn't even noticed until it suddenly wasn't there.

Most importantly, though—

Along with feeling and hearing, he's seen it, now. His eyes track the peculiar orb as it disappears into the cavernous sleeves of what was once so unassuming of a man, and so . . .

Magnifico blinks. He hesitates. Considers. Processes. And when the wheels in his head finally click into their proper places, he squares Geto's gaze with a perhaps admittedly obvious conclusion: “So . . . I suppose this would mean you aren't just some traveling monk after all. You didn't—oh, I don't know—find it relevant to announce this particular talent of yours until this very moment, is that it?”

[amarriageoftrueminds]

It's not really fanon though, is it, it's more like a dark!Steve / HydraCap AU.

I mean if you wrote a fanfic where Steve Rogers willingly gave an infinity stone to:

A) a Nazi, B) who was so extreme a Nazi that they thought Adolf Hitler wasn't extreme enough, C) and is also the specific Nazi who has just murdered Natasha.

And this fanfic Steve also: - somehow knew what Hydra minions' secret signal to each other was / smirked at impersonating a Hydra agent, - did nothing about Natasha being dead even though he knows wizards who can reverse time and has all 6 magic 'can do literally anything including bringing back dead people' infinity stones, - abandoned Bucky in the future (...because being stuck alone in the future is bad when it happens to Steve, but Bucky can just choke??), - abandoned Sam (hey Sammy, thanks for the loyalty, here's a millstone, go fuck yourself), - To go and be trapped in a time Steve criticised in his movie as the 'kids are riddled with polio and all the food is boiled' era, - and marry a Nazi collaborator, whom he never even dated, - but who did violently attack him, after assuming he was a dumb bitch/male predator of women himself but still wanting to date him, - and who -- for decades -- employed and signed pay-checks to Bucky's Nazi torturer, and the guy who invented Winter Soldier mind-control - the Nazi also tortured other American POWs of Steve's father's regiment to death, tried to kill Steve once before, made the tesseract bomb Hydra wanted to drop on Steve's home city of New York, also made Project Insight (which she lied to Steve about days before said Nazi tried to kill him for the second time?) - and she made said Nazi immortal?!

And Fanfic Steve does this, even though Steve explicitly said he didn't want the white picket fence life, had always identified New York and Brooklyn as his home (not DC), such that Sam would fly to New York without prompting if Steve told him to take them 'home', and Steve also said that he couldn't just sit there and do nothing when he sees something wrong, and he's not sorry that he is this way?)

...you'd have to tag that fic like #HydraCap, #Evil-Steve, #Dark-Steve, #Skrull-Steve, #Not Steve Rogers Friendly, etc., or people would be complaining in the comments that this 'AU where Steve is a TWAT' Dark Fic wasn't properly warned for. 🤷‍♀️

just going to say that you’re not a real steve rogers stan if you think endgame made sense for his character. you prefer fanon, and that’s ok, but the real steve rogers would never go back in time rather than March forward. he would never abandon his friends. he would always choose a pickett line over a pickett fence. bc that man could retire from being captain america, but never from being steve rogers

[snekdood]

i figured out the issue with tumblr and its that it will never be a good art site bc everyones always got some shit to say and everyone always thinks theyre right and thats why no one reblogs shit because “it could be problematic in a way im not detecting and someone will yell at me later for it” type shit. literal cesspool ass website.

[smutinlove]

Jason Todd having a size kink will never not be on my mind. he’s 6ft, 6’2ft depending what universe you’re talking about and weighs at least 200 lbs if not more, he is built like a tank.

took him awhile to get use to his size so being around people who are 5’2 even 5’5, seemed abnormal to him. could pick us up with no effort, throw us over his shoulder and walk like nothing happened.

he would use his weight for advantage, leaning down real close almost suffocating but enough to get the gears turning… his hands? ough. big enough to wrap around throats, thighs.

sorry had some thoughts

YES, OH MY GOD.

after the pit changed him, it took him awhile to get used to his height and general appearance. I mean, this man is 6ft and weighs around 200 pounds.

he'd be hitting his head on doorframes and towering over people. can't reach the cereal box on the top shelf? don't worry, he'll get it.

and he's so strong and muscular too.

oh my god, he'd be the type of person to pick up ANYONE and throw them over his shoulder with no hesitation.

he'd even do it for fun.

and we all know that Jason reads books. he ain't no basic becky, okay? this man reads and it makes men and women feral for him.

this man's hands are big. so basically, he'd be enveloping the book in his hands.

speaking of his big hands, Jason's hands WANDER.

when his face is buried between your thighs, he'll occasionally give them a tight, good squeeze, causing you to whine. then he'll mutter something like: "aw, is my precious angel getting all worked up? come on, baby, i wanna hear those sounds."

this man is addicting.

he'll also occasionally give your throat a nice squeeze if he feels like it. or if you ask him to. he'll do it either way.

his big, veiny hand wrapped around your throat, leaving only a little bit of room for you to breathe.

this man is horny too.

he'll fuck you whenever and wherever. he has no shame. he'll do it in your local grocery stores' bathroom or even at the back of a bar.

and the groans he'll let out while he fuck your brains out.

"come on, doll, 'that all 'ya can do f'me?" or "fuck, you drive me crazy, love. your pretty face and thick thighs. you don't even know half of what you do to me."

More size k!!nk headcanons

[adrienneleclerc]

Wrong Name

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader

Summary: Charles pranks Y/N by calling her the wrong name to see how she would react, it did not go well

Warning: spelling and grammatical errors

A/N: inspired by @23victoria post “what did you call me” also I figured Y/N put Charles through two TikTok pranks, it’s only fair Charles pulls a prank on her. Same universe as “say it back” and “can you get out?” Also, super sorry if your name is Romina.

Charles was on TikTok because he couldn’t sleep and saw a video where a girl called her boyfriend by the wrong name. He decided to take it upon himself to pull this prank on his girlfriend. He just hopes she doesn’t get angry.

“Muñeco, im getting groceries for dinner, I’ll be back soon!” Y/N calls out.

“Okay, Mon ange.” Charles said, getting off the couch to say goodbye to his girlfriend properly. “I love you.” Charles kissed Y/N.

“I love you too.” Y/N said before leaving. Charles decided to play video games and when he heard the door open 30 minutes later, that’s when he decided to put his plan into action. Y/N was putting the groceries away in the fridge when…

“Hey Romina, what did you buy?” Charles said and Y/N closed the fridge and the bags that were on the counter were long forgotten because she was now in front of the TV.

“What did you say?” Y/N asked.

“I said ‘hey Y/N, what did you buy?’ Are you feeling alright?” Charles asked, pausing his game. He felt so guilty for the gaslighting.

“The hell you did, you just called me Romina. Who the fuck is Romina?” Y/N asked in a louder tone.

“Romina, calm down.” Charles said and that’s when he knew he fucked up.

“First of all, you never tell a woman to calm down, have you learned NOTHING from watching TV or having other girlfriends? Second, you just called me Romina AGAIN! So please, calmly tell me…” Y/N said as she went to their bedroom to get one of her chanclas 🩴 “who the hell is Romina before I become like my mother and beat your ass with this chancla.”

“There’s no need to get violent, Y/N.” Charles said.

“Really? Then tell me why did you call me Romina.” Y/N said.

“It was a prank.” Charles said. “I saw a TikTok of girls calling their boyfriends by the wrong name and I wanted to see how you would react.” Charles confessed shyly.

“You chose THAT prank, specifically THAT one, to pull on me, a girl who has been cheated on before?” Y/N asked rhetorically.

“Yeah, I didn’t think it through actually.” Charles admitted.

“Menso, i was actually gonna hit you.” Y/N said.

“You love me too much to hit me.” Charles said.

“That’s true. Anyway, I have to finish putting the groceries away because someone decided to be a pendejo and prank me. Like why would you prank me? I’m a freaking delight.” Y/N said, walking save to the kitchen

“You pranked me twice, ma Belle!” Charles exclaimed, following her.

“Okay but those were cute pranks, that prank would have ended up with me in jail.” Y/N said, putting the groceries away on the fridge, freezer, and pantry.

“I would never let you go to jail.” Charles said,

“Hey, so while I’m cooking dinner, I’m gonna put on some music, okay.” Y/N said.

“Yeah that’s fine.” Charles said and they kissed. Y/N out her phone on full volume to CUIDADITO by Becky G and Chiquis, singing out loud and specific part.

“Yo no soy celosa pero si eso pasa me transformo en otra. Te poncho las llantas dormirás afuera y esa misma noche le marco a mi suegra para que recoja a la cochinada que un día parió. Te rayo el carro te quiebro los vidrios y voy a llamar a todos mis amigos para que me ayuden que en un pisteada lo arregló yo. Nomas cuidadito con ponerme el cuerno que todo eso lo hago y hasta más me atrevo y no mas te advierto que cuidadito con ponerme el cuerno de la que te salvaste da gracias a dios que nomas fue una broma.” Y/N sung, changing the last two words (which are originally ‘un sueño ’ which means ‘a dream’). I’m not a jealous woman but if that were to happen, I become a different person. I’ll slash your tires, you’ll be sleeping outside, and I’ll call my mother in law that same night to pick up the piece of shit she gave birth to. I’ll key your car, break your windows, and I’ll call my friends so they’ll help me, I’ll handle it in one good beating. If you cheat on me, just be careful because I would do all of that and even more, I’m just warning you to be careful if you cheat on me. You got lucky, thank god it was only just a prank

“Mon ange, what’s that song about?” Charles asked curiously.

“The song is about a women who dreamt that her husband cheated on her. She would have done some crazy shit if he actually cheated her so he’s fucking lucky it was only a dream.” Y/N said with a smile.

“But you sang ‘broma’ and that’s means ‘joke’…” charles said,

“Or prank.” Y/N said,

“You sang that for me?!?” Charles yelled.

“Yes I did so you know, cuidadito.” Y/N warned.

“I Don’t know whether to be scared of you or attracted to you.” Charles confessed and Y/N laughed.

“Both work, mi Amor. You want lomo saltado or tallarines saltado?” Y/N asked.

“Whats the difference?” Charles asked.

“Lomo has French fries and is served with rice, tallarines is pasta.” Y/N said,

“Pasta please.” Charles said,

“Of course, muñeco.” Y/N said, chopping the steak into little strips while humming the music to CUIDADITO and Charles stared at her because he found himself humming too.

“You know I would never cheat on you, right Y/N?” Charles asked just to make sure.

“Of course I know you’d never cheat on me. But the song is so catchy.” Y/N commented and that made Charles feel so much better. He walked up to Y/N and hugged her from behind as she continued to chop the steak, he kissed her shoulder.

“I love you,” Charles said,

“I love you too.” Y/N said,

The End

Hope y’all liked it! A silly little one shot for giggles 🤭

[darkwehl]

Reblogging with @himejoshiwrestling 's tags because theyre making me go a little crazy actually

A few interesting things from this moment:

1. Asuka's word choice for "we" (uchi) has a STRONG connotation that they are a group and Bayley is NOT part of that group, she's "soto," outside.

2. Iyo and Kairi's smug nods.

3. Dakota's reaction.

I generally hate "heels speak a foreign language" because it's usually just plain lazy, but the way they're using Japanese against Bayley is so wickedly, deliciously diabolical that I don't mind it.

(Translation details):

[mysunshinetemptress]

“Leah and Y/n, they hate each other” Ella stated from the bench watching the chaos unfold, you still lying on the ground clutching your ankle, after all it was a hard tackle and you don’t normally go down so easy.

“Are you sure about that” Ellie replied to the midfielder, her eyes drifting from you to watch Leah shove Janine Beckie.

“Touch her one more time tonight and it will be the last game you play for awhile.” Leah seethed her finger poking harshly into the Canadians chest.

You were hurt, she hurt you.

“Sure Yl/n is her co captain I’m sure she’s just looking out for her in that sense.” Ella continued.

Ellie shook her head “No way El, I’ve seen G and Kiera take a hit and Leah never reacts like this.”

Ella looked between you both confusion running through her eyes “But they hate each other.”

Leah pushes past her teammates into the changing room and charges straight for you.

“Pull that shit again and I’ll have you benched Co captain or not.”

You try to argue but she won’t allow it instead speaking over you.

“You know better then to make those runs, you know how to get out of those situations, don’t get caught up in them again.”

Leah pauses and for a second her features relax “Don’t get injured, don’t get hurt, we need you.”

Your features soften in response too “I know I was stupid, I’m sorry it won’t happen again.”

A/n you guys this is purely based on Agatha all along or is it something else

[wosostories]

Pranks

Prompt: Can you do a uswnt x teen reader, where reader gets hurt when someone pulls a prank on her or something like that?

Sonny pulls Y/N in to the aftermath of a prank and it doesn't go as planned.

You were heading back to your room from a meeting with coach. You had been told that you were going to be starting in tomorrow's game. You were so excited that you didn’t notice Sonnett running down the hallway. 

“Y/N watch out!” She calls out right before she runs into you. You wobble a little but she steadies you before you hit the ground. “Sorry! Got to run.” She is about to take off again down the hallway. “Actually, I could use you.” Sonny grabs your hand and drags you down the hallway behind her. 

“Why are we running? What did you do?” You ask her. 

“There is no reason for the running. I didn't do anything. Why would you even ask that?” Sonny responds. 

“Sonny, get back here!” You hear Kelley yell from down the hallway. 

“Did you prank Kelley?”

“Maybe?”

“Becky told you that you aren’t allowed to drag me into your prank wars. And I think that this constitutes dragging me.”

“I may be dragging you, but this is not a prank war so not breaking Beckys rules.”

You turn a corner and are all of a sudden heading down a set of stairs. Sonnett’s grip around your wrist made it impossible to get out of it without hurting yourself. 

“Can you let me go please. I was on my way to get ready for dinner. I am already running late.”

“You're fine, we can just go to dinner right now.” You are keeping up with Sonny until the final bit on the first floor. You trip over one of the stairs and let out a yelp as you fall down the final few stairs. You fall into Sonny and you both tumble to the ground in a heap. 

“Sonny! Y/N!” Kelley calls from the flight of stairs above you. This draws the attention of some of the other girls who are waiting in the meal room which is next door to the staircase. 

In a second they were at the bottom of the stairs as Sonnett peels herself off the floor. 

“Oh God, Y/N! Are you ok?” You let out a groan clutching your wrist to your chest. 

“Sonnett what did you do?” Becky all but yells. 

“I- I didn’t…” 

Ali came running in with the team doctor. 

“Y/N can you sit up for me?” The medic asked. She helped you into a sitting position leaning up against the wall. She took your hand into her own and started poking it in different spots. 

The rest of the girls turned back to Sonnett and Kelley knowing that you were in good hands. They were berating them as the medic made her assessment. 

You let out a cry and tears start streaming down your face as she continues her assessment. “I think it's broken. We need to get you to the hospital for x-rays and casting.”

“A- am I still going to be able to start tomorrow?” You ask through your tears. All of your teammates went silent waiting for the answer. 

The medic sighed, “It’s not the end of the world, you will have another opportunity to start. You are only 16.” 

“Y/N I’m so sorry.” You shake your head and let the medic help you to your feet. Her and Ali help you out of the hotel to head to the hospital. 

“You’re the one who is going to tell coach why Y/N can’t start tomorrow. And the part you played in it.” Becky told her. 

Sonnett nodded tears in her own eyes, “I hope you think pulling her into the prank was worth it.” Kelley said, walking past her leaving Sonny alone as the team made their way back to the meal room to wait on news of Y/N wrist. 

[ultimateloserboy]

duck and red guy are not good people.

ive probably said this a million times already but friendly reminder that they’re incredibly grey. they ruin their own lives just as much as the house does it for them, not to mention how theyre responsible for most of the turmoil in yellows life. duck especially loves with his entire heart, but that doesnt stop him from being a piece of shit.

a lot of you watch the series with this idea that the main three are poor innocent babies trapped and helpless when actually, if there was anywhere else to go (which its implied there isnt) red and duck would never fuckin get there because theyre too selfish and stupid to make it.

becky and joe said themselves in a QnA that yellow made it up the stairs alone because red and duck are just too cynical and selfish to ever make it anywhere. the second yellow started heading down the stairs it was over for him, because red and duck will NEVER listen. they want answers but are too stubborn to ever receive them. The house could be unlocked completely and theyd keep themselves there

Not to mention how they treat each other. they either enable each others shitty behavior, or give up on trying to stop each other. red starts to get onto duck for his behavior towards yellow, but then he joins in to make fun of him multiple times. because he doesnt actually care that much, and that apathy can make him cruel

i think a lot of you forget that even as they are normally, even on the regular floor— not even being bigger boys— they DROWNED THEIR FUCKING CAT!!!!!!!!

and they did it together, is what gets me. theyre codependent. theyre all the other really has, the only other adult really to talk to. they completely disagree on everything, having the opposite worldview of each other which causes them to argue constantly— but theyre all the other has. the only one as shitty as themself. they get stuck with each other in the bigger rooms. growing grotesque together, ruining themselves TOGETHER. they get farther apart. they speak to each other less. they torture smaller things for entertainment rather than talking with each other— but theyre still stuck together. glued to each others hip until the world stops spinning, but always being too cowardly and stubborn to be kind to one another and let themselves be happy together.

even when they reach clarity, or they hit an arc that makes them better people— theyll just forget tomorrow, and go right back to being terrible.

theyre not helpless. sure theyre victims, but not perfect ones— and they themselves have victims of their own

and dont even get me started on the mischaracterization of red in this fandom. YES hes just as bad as duck!!! hes not a fucking baby hes a grown ass man!!! he says the same shit as duck all of the time and yall see it differently cuz his voice is nicer to hear or he says it quieter. and may i add— he can be socially awkward and still an asshole. he can be neurodivergent and still an asshole. it doesnt cancel out, you dont have to pick one or the other.

yall take everything interesting out of these characters so you can make them sexymen but to me the sexiest part is the nuance of the character. duck and red are assholes but that doesnt make them unlikable, the show itself proves that. theyre incredibly likeable but still do terrible shit, and yall forget BECAUSE of how likeable they are.

this isnt meant to be some post to make you think theyre bad people that you should hate because thats bullshit. theyre not good people but theyre not overall bad people either. their actions are terrible but at the end of the day they can and have been better, even if only temporarily. there is a part of them that could easily fit into a happy family— a part of them that can heal each other instead of hurt each other. but unfortunately thats the part thats always erased

(little edit i dont know if they explicitly drowned their cat BUT its implied they did kill it. sorry two-three years of piecing my own shit together i lose which parts ive determined myself. dont wanna sit here and just say my own theories as fact tho, so the drowning specifically was just my guess! sorry abt that chat i hope u still trust me with canon cries)

[lvrslvt3]

FAMOUS BOYFRIEND | c.dixon

main masterlist | youtuber masterlist

౨ৎ pairings: chris dixon x fem!reader

౨ৎ summary : reader deals with anxiety struggles with having a boyfriend in the spotlight

౨ৎ warnings : panic attack, alcohol

౨ৎ notes : this is so bad but i need to get back into the routine of posting !!

“i don’t have to-“

“it will only be for five minutes,” you squeezed your boyfriend’s hand, “i’m sure I’ll learn to survive.” you joked to try and hide how anxious you were feeling, letting chris stare at you for a few seconds before he gives you a kiss on the forehead.

“I won’t be long.” he promised, squeezing your hand one last time before turning to his group of friends that were being swarmed by fans in the small pub. the herd moving towards them jostled you around, knocking the wind from you slightly.

you turned and started to fight your way through the crowd, the sweat beginning to prickle on ur back. you had been anxious since you woke up, it was just one of those days, but you were determined that it wouldn’t ruin your day. even though all day, you had been pushed to your limits.

right now, you just wanted to get home.

just as you got to the door, and almost out of the crowd, a group of men barged right by you. you stumbled to the wall, hitting your hip against a table. you hissed, and tears began to form as you turned to the pair at the table and apologised yet only received dirty looks in advance.

“y/n?” a female voice called out, and you sighed in relief at the sight of becky. “are you okay?” the question made everything suddenly bubble up. with your best effort you choked it back down and simply shook your head and exited the pub, not caring who you barged by.

soon as you were out you leaned against the wall, crouching down and putting ur head in ur hands. you needed to get a grip. your boyfriend and his friends would be coming out any second and they couldn’t see you looking like this. “hey, hey, hey. look at me.”

you felt a comforting arm around you and you looked up at becky, who smelled of beer and perfume. “what’s wrong, sweetie?” she rubbed your back and you opened your mouth, but with the slight quiver of ur chin you quickly shut it up. she stood you up so she could give you a proper hug, hiding your face from the door so no one would see you.

you took deep breaths in, smelling her perfume and the fresh air and finally managing to calm your nerves again. “sorry, i swear I’m like mentally stable I just can’t with all of-“ you waved your hand to the pub to finish your sentence, “it just all bubbled up a bit there.”

the woman nodded, pulling away and holding ur hand. “anxiety?” she questioned, and you looked away from the pub to her. you almost lied but with the slight tightening she gave ur hand u nodded. “do you want me to get chris?”

“no, I’m fine, honestly. let him finish up.” you lifted ur head, trying to let your eyes dry by slightly rubbing them with ur finger to try and not smear ur makeup. “so, does it look like I just almost had a nervous breakdown in a pub?”

becky laughed, and you smiled a little as the tension eased down in your body a little. “only a little, but no one will notice. you just look a little tipsy.” she smiled at you, “i’m gonna go see where chris is,” she put a finger up before u could interrupt, “you’re not gonna burden him. now, do u wanna come inside or wait here?”

you waited a moment, sniffled then accepted your fait. “I’ll wait out here.” you mumbled, smiling a little once she turned and headed back into the noisy pub. you sighed and wrapped your arms around yourself, hoping that you never bothered chris and at the same time thanking becky for being your saviour.

“babe?” a familiar voice interrupted your thoughts, an arm coming around your shoulders to lean you into his chestas you moved transfixed gaze from the road to the familiar blonde that was studying your face. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—“

“never mind that,” he quickly interrupted, pulling off his jacket and putting it around you. “are you okay?” he questioned. you didn’t answer, the quivering lip did it all for you. you didn’t wanna break down here, but the look he gave you made it almost un preventable “do you want to talk about it now or wait till we’re home?”

“home.”

chris nodded, “the taxi i called before should be here any minute. becky said that she loves you and message her tomorow or call.” he rubbed your arm, afraid to let you go again. you nodded, still too afraid to speak.

“y/n!” a male voice cheered as your friends came out of the pub, “you dissapeared.” arthur hill commented, then stumbled back and almost lost his footing. you giggled, leaning further into your boyfriends chest as you tried to hide the slight quiver from the heavy feeling in your chest.

george caught him, luckily, just as your taxi approached. “okay, who’s coming home?” chris questioned as half the group had already started walking away, on to the next pub. “i think i need a nightcap.” arthur grabbed george, “goodnight lovebirds!”

the man walked away in a fit of giggles, finding the joke funnier than it was. you shock your head, a small smile on your face. “stay safe, if you guys need anything I’ll stay up for you lot.” you called out as chris opened the door for you, keeping a hand on ur back as u waved to his friends before sliding into the back seat.

you laid your head on chris’s shoulder while he placed a firm hand on your thigh, lazily stroking it with his thumb as he made small talk with the driver on the way to your flat. every so often he would place a faint kiss on the side of ur head, and you had to fight the tears threatening to spill out.

— — —

the flat door locked behind chris, and it was if all those deep breaths had been for nothing because with the safety net of ur boyfriend, you felt everything rising up again. “I’m gonna go get water out for the boys.” you muttered, but chris quickly intervened.

“I’ll do it, just go and get something comfy on and I’ll be in a second.” he placed a kiss on ur forehead again, turning into the kitchen and grabbing some water, medicine and a quick snack they could have before bed to hopefully sober them up a bit.

you hummed, too tired to let out any more noise as you trudged along to his room. you quickly threw ur nice clothes into the hamper and put on a pair of ur shorts and one of chris’s hoodies. you then brushed and messily braided ur hair, and by the time you finished it off with a hair tie chris had came back.

“you ready to talk yet, darling?” he placed two hands on ur waist, and you sighed while letting your hands drop, leaning into him as if you were dead weight. he held you up as you wrapped your arms around him.

“what’s got you so upset?” he asked and finally, it all came crashing down. you began to cry as you mumbled out an explanation, all while he rubbed ur back and hummed as if he understood you’re jumbled up sentences.

eventually he pulled away, guiding you to sit down on the bed. “it’s okay, babe. i’m here, okay?” he wiped the tears from under your eyes, placing a firm kiss on your head once again before pulling away. “take a deep breath, then tell me what’s wrong.”

you nodded, inhaling and exhaling before finally starting again. “it just all got too much, its like I woke up with a weight on my chest and it just built up and built up and now i feel like im drowning and i can’t save myself.” the explanation was dramatic, but it was the best way to describe how you felt.

“sometimes the crowds, and the fans just push me over the edge.” you finally admitted, casting your eyes down as if you had disappointed him. chris frowned, “i’m so—“

“no.” you quickly cut him off, “don’t apologise for your success. it’s not your fault, it’s not anybody’s.” you rationalised, “but it’s just sometimes that contributes to my anxiety, but so does breathing so don’t blame yourself for that.”

chris smiled a little, “i was gonna apologise for not noticing sooner. i would never apologise for that, I mean look at this charming smile, how could i not be famous?” he placed a hand on his face as he gave a toothy smile, and you giggled at the stupid action.

“look, i’m glad you told me eventually but you know that you can tell me anything, anytime, anywhere, okay? you’re my number one priority.” he grabbed ur hand, and you nodded. “nothing will ever come in the way of that.”

you let our a sigh of relief, wiping your eyes again and nodding. chris stood up while continuing to talk, “you’re never gonna be a burden to me,” he added on as he grabbed your makeup wipes and began to wipe ur face, gently just as you had showed him before.

“except that one time you got your period on valentines, that was a burde—“ chris’s bad joke was interrupted by you smacking his chest, a laughing erupting from him which made you giggle and shake your head. “only joking, lovely.”

he grinned at the sight of you cheering up, finishing up taking off your makeup then putting the wipes in the bin. “now, why don’t we watch a movie while we wait on our idiot roommates to come home?”

[specialagentartemis]

ykw i am having so much fan watching you be a hater, that i’ve decided to ask for more. PLEASE give us a rant about a book you hated.

Haha aw I'm honored. And uh I hope you don't have any particular attachment to Becky Chambers. Sorry in advance.

But A Psalm for the Wild-Built won a Hugo and I do not get the love. Book 1 was nice enough, yeah. Book 2 had me tearing my hair out.

Sibling Dex is a restless Tea Monk who serves the God of Small comforts on the science-fantasy planet of Panga. I genuinely love the idea of a tea monk - part therapist, part confessor, travels around to the different towns, mixes tea blends for people, lets them talk about their worries and fears and stresses, and gives them, if not advice, then sympathy and a listening ear and some calming tea. This is meaningful work but they're unhappy. After doing this for a while they're still unsatisfied with their life, so they go into the woods searching for self-actualization, and meet a robot named Mosscap, a wild robot that lives in the woods. See, hundreds of years ago, all the robots "woke up" and became sentient one day, then they staged a quiet rebellion against humanity's greed and industrialization by walking into the woods and never coming back. Now, the continent is split in half: humans stay on the Human Side, and robots stay on the Robot Side. The Robot Side is kept wild and humans are discouraged from going in there because humans can't be trusted not to ruin Nature. The rpbots are welcome to come to the Human Side, they just never have. Dex is the first person in a While to venture into the woods of the Robot Side, and the first human since the great walkout to see a robot. Mosscap gives Dex a lot of philosophical pep talks about not pushing themself so hard, about allowing themself to just rest and appreciate the world without feeling like they need to be Providing A Service to justify their existence. It's a nice theme. Underbaked, imo, but nice. Relateable.

Book 2 was a goddamn mess.

Book 1 mostly takes place in the wilderness of the woods, so it's okay if the nice utopian human community Dex comes from was sketchily-built. It Just Works, and everyone Is Just Nice, this is a science-fantasy parable. There were some issues I had with it - like the strict ideological and physical divide between Nature and Humans, and the fact that Dex's religion seems to be the Only Religion In The World, and it's vaguely secular-humanist with the gods being not "really" gods but names given to primordial forces and philosophical concepts, and the religion not really making any demands of its adherents in any way except to become their best selves and devote themselves to what they like... it's potentially interesting, but overall kinda lazy. It felt like Becky Chambers was aware of the idea that having an enlightened-atheist sci-fi utopia is Problematic, so she made there be a central religion, but she also didn't want it to have any of the ~icky~ things religions have, like belief in anything supernatural, or dietary restrictions, or creeds, or codes of behavior, or expectations to make any kind of sacrifice in any way. All the gods "ask" is that humans observe and appreciate the world. But whatever.

In book 2, Dex and Mosscap return to Dex's society, and the book seems to want to explain how the world works, and oh my GOD is Chambers not prepared to do this.

"Observe and appreciate" is all anyone is asked to do. Book 2, A Prayer for the Crown-Shy, is an ode to ultimate virtue of Doing Nothing. There's this attitude I see in a LOT of utopian fiction, where the author is bluntly just not a good enough author to imagine a utopian society where people act like people, so in the world of Panga, utopian society is achieved through 1) homogeneity 2) no one giving a crap about anything.

As far as I can tell, there is the one religion. Most people are Fine with this. Most people are Fine with anything. There are no characters with distinct personalities. There's no money, except there is, except it's not real money and no one will deny you anything if your balance is in the red, even though your balance is available to be seen by anyone - this does not cause any kind of shame or pride or competition in any way, and Dex doesn't understand why it might. There are no hierarchies or governing bodies, people just volunteer to step up when things need doing (this is portrayed as great and not deeply concerning). There are different communities, but in them, everyone is uniformly nice, friendly, and helpful at all times. There are some parts of nature, like the seashore, where people are not allowed to go because they'll ruin the environment, and this is accepted as correct and necessary. Most people live in hippie, pro-recycling, high-tech, end-of-history green communities; there's one group they visit, however, that doesn't trust technology, and lives in a vaguely sci-fi-Amish way. You might think, Dex travelling around with a robot, this might cause conflict! It does not. The people from this community calmly explain their anti-technology position, Dex calmly explains their pro-technology position, and they politely respect each other. "Not bothered either way" is a phrase that turns up in various permutations a lot and is held up as the good, mature, responsible way to be.

There's a scene where they catch a fish for dinner, and instead of killing it, the scifi-Amish guy says "We let the air do that for us, and they let the fish slowly suffocate to death in the air while they all look on solemnly and sadly. This is portrayed as a deep, beautiful moment of them witnessing and honoring the final moments of a living being's life. And not. y'know. them torturing a living being to death so they can keep their own hands clean.

This is what I mean about the valorization of passivity: observing is all you are ever obligated to do. Letting a fish die in the air is better than killing it quickly and humanely, because doing things gets your hands dirty, while letting things simply happen is the Correct way to do it.

At the end, Mosscap and Dex blow off all their promises and appointments and just hang out at the beach chilling out instead, because do what you want forever, you don't have to do shit. This is the happy affirming ending. Mosscap you fucking said you'd meet with the city leaders as the robot ambassador to the humans, did you tell them you were blowing off this commitment because you didn't feel like doing that anymore??? Did you even let them know??????

It is SUCH a baffling book. The theme wants to be "you are more than your job, you deserve to just Be" and ends up feeling like "you don't have to do anything ever, and no one can make you do anything you don't want to do if you don't feel like it, and you don't owe anyone anything and searching for a purpose in your life is just making you stressed out so chill at the beach instead."

The thing that drives me crazy is like. Mosscap cheerfully tells Dex about robots that spend twenty years in a cave watching stalactites form because they think it's beautiful, and those robots are just as much a valued part of society as anyone else. Appreciating beauty and wonder is good enough, you don't need to be productive. And I'm just. fuckin. like. Humans are not robots! Robots don't need to eat or sleep! Humans need food, and clothes, and shelter, and medical care, and if we don't have SOMEONE working to provide that, we Die! Nice as it would be, we CAN'T just all do nothing forever until we feel like it! We can't do that!

And at the same time, the book bizarrely treats wanting a purpose in life as like... almost disordered. If you are seeking a purpose in life it's because you just haven't let go of your guilt and relaxed enough. It's bizarre. Valorization of passivity. Humans aren't meant to be in nature so we just Shouldn't. Doing nothing and having no strong opinions is the most self-affirmed you can possibly be. Letting a fish suffocate is more moral than quickly breaking its neck or spiking its brain. Someone else will do it. Who, if we're all supposed to be resting and only doing what we feel like? Don't worry about it.

"The heart of this book is comfort [...] There is nothing in it that can hurt you." YOU LIAR BECKY CHAMBERS THE FISH SCENE STILL DISTURBS AND UPSETS ME TO THIS DAY