#sorry this is actually so baf

[kindaasrikal]

I need people to remember that Nya was also in love with Jay since day 1, its just that it wasn’t her biggest priority seeing as she was going through a whole thing called insecurities and finding who she is outside of her brother and outside of her parents and outside of her village and outside of Jay.

Nya loves Jay the same amount, she has loved Jay just as long as Jay had, but her love for Jay wasn’t something she was willing to pursue when absolutely everyone would dumb her down to just that. The same way everyone was already dumbing her down to Kai’s sister the second they all met, and the same way they were already dumbing her down to just the love interest between Jay and Cole even after finding her identity and place as Samurai X. Imagine how much it hit her when Samurai X, and image she crafted so carefully with so much love and attention and pride, was suddenly belittled and mocked because apparently he was actually a she.

And you can’t forget the fact that she was suddenly forced to grapple with another new identity as the water ninja, and then had to deal with all the hate and mockery and belittling everyone was doing as she wasn’t just the water ninja, but the girl ninja. Its not easy to hear the comments people from a whole city make of you because of your gender. Even people from your own gender, and it must’ve been even worse because no one else understood, they knew it was a problem but they still believed her reactions were too over the top. The stress of all of that and then also having someone she loved but wasn’t ready to love with try force another path onto her was bound to stress her out.

Jay wasn’t necessarily an ass during that season, from what i can remember. He was a whole mess yeah, his insecurities making him take actions he wouldn’t have before and try forcing his wants and desires onto someone else who wasn’t ready for it. But he grew and learnt and stopped all that as the season progressed. He had to understand that the people around him won’t just leave or downgrade him, and that he must ease his own anxiety and understand that whatever happens will happen for the good of them all. That doesn’t change the fact that his actions in the beginning was a shi show though, so no wonder Nya pushed him away during that time. Reminder that you can still be angry and annoyed at someone you love, especially when they deserve it.

Not to mention she has never been all that vocal with her affection. Not like Jay. You know she cares and loves you simply through the way she trusts people but shes also been a lot more locked up over her emotions, and thats okay. Because Jay knows (haha, knew.) that Nya loves him just as much because if she didn’t she would very obviously state that. She may not be vocal over her emotions or her love for someone, but she is over her opinions. She won’t just let someone use her or mess with her because she feels bad or that she has too.

Right now, for Nya and Jay’s character, I’d rather focus on the identity crisis that JAY is going through now instead of Nya, and of how NYA is the one chasing and wanting to bring Jay into her life despite him not wanting (not being ready?) to do so. I’d rather focus on her development as a character and now as a teacher. And how Nya is going to change and grow like how Jay changed and grew in Skybound for her. Honestly I would love a lot more focus of developing Nya’s character as an adult who is horrible at being vulnerable and how she will grow, with the whole ‘Nya and Jay!’ Thing just a tad bit more in the background and used as more of a kick up for it. And for us to watch what may happen to Jay as he changes in a new environment with new memories and experiences.

For once, i want to watch them grow separately rather than watch them grow for each other. I know Nya can do that, but it’s only with Jay having lost his memories that he’s now capable of doing that for himself and only himself.

Sorry this was huge throw up of a rant so honestly just believe that this is five random points shoved into one post and rambled in a horrible way

Edit: reminder that Nya didn’t just disregard her feelings for Jay just so she wouldn’t be placed as simply his girlfriend, but also because she had many other worries. Completing missions and making sure everyone lived, being the biggest brain and planner in the team for ages, as well understanding her self outside of her town that she lived in for ages. Kai was able to fond himself easily amongst the other ninja, but Nya didn’t have that. So obviously she, as a 13-16 year old young teenage girl, would rather focus on finding new hobbies and having new experiences than pursuing a love life she wouldn’t even be confident in pursuing in. Jay and Nya are not each other only priority or worry, their love for each other is important to them and who they are, but isn’t the most defining factor or shouldn’t be the most focused.

[mimkyyyy]

Biggest shoutout to that one trolls fanfic I found searching for gold. It isn’t even the best thing I’ve read the but it’s rotting my brain and I need you guys to experience the beauty of this art I’ve made for it. I ended up making an entire PowerPoint deep dive on the story I’m genuinely deranged.

[wwooyology]

istfg that some ppl in the kpop bst community don't understand the damn values of some of these fucking photocards. like wym you want to trade for a pob AND an ultimate vip ld for a damn EXCLUSIVE????? just bc the pc is in high demand does NOT mean it's value is higher. like if ppl are gonna continue to be like this I'd rather just buy a whole new album and take my chances at pulling for the pcs I want jesus.

this is also the second time THIS WEEK that someone has done this to me. I have another person offering me the bow exclusive pcs and istfg they do the same thing I'mma just jump bc wtf is wrong with ppl???

[moe-broey]

I am...... getting A Little nostalgic for Stardew Valley........ but I know it is SUCH a commitment like if I get back into that shit I'm blacking out for a month. I Cannot Allow It

[suenitos]

I think people genuinely just can’t really understand the nature of guns in the US. Because for non-Americans, the US is so so influential on a lot of countries, and when things go bad in America politics-wise a lot of people outside of it do start to fear the same things happening here. And so for a country to be so influential and powerful have the gun violence it does… it’s scary. Of course we all know there are so many people in the US who want change and are advocating for it and know the fear isn’t normal, but we also see the Republicans who seem to think their right to a gun is crucial. And with the way Western politics as a whole is shifting very right-wing, I think a lot of people fear the reintroduction of guns in their own countries.

yeah I think you’re mainly right about a lot of these aspects. I also admit I can’t rlly see the outside pov of other countries because I’m ‘merican so it’s like a bit of my own national myopia and also lived experience influencing the way I understand the us. I think it’s very different having to see and experience mass violence constantly around the country (not even just with guns but other things too, with your point on right wing politics) therefore becoming desensitized to it in a way than it is living somewhere where you will not see a gun in public and dont/wont experience that fear. so it’s easier to be like “??!!” with both the physical and emotional distance from these events. violence and the threat of violence does exist everywhere but the us is very unique in the way that some of our accepted cultural values coincide with the continuous ignorance and lack of reckoning/education and honest reflection about our past. also the fact that politics is bought here and is intentionally divisive/more like a sport contributes to a lottt of our issues. anyway. despite its reputation as an influential/somewhat “rich” country you are not guaranteed personal safety at any point during your stay in the us and again that’s true everywhere but you are more likely to die/experience it firsthand because of it here which IS really sad. its just interesting people say “are you guys ok” or “this isn’t normal” when it’s like yeah you’re right oh btw I just read about 4 shootings that happened the past two weeks because this person went to the wrong house/car or just existed outside a Walgreens or asked for help on the train as a homeless person so no we’re not doing too hot rn

[ask-butterscotch-and-friends]

Goodbye, Silent...

Silent Sweeney is a character I created back in 2017, originally named Silent Bendy.

Back in the days of the old Bendy blog, Silent served more of a purpose. They actually had more going on than Butterscotch (just called Bendy at the time) story wise, and had a lot more people interested in them. They were very much a fan favorite back in those days.

But...I noticed something.

Ever since I created Butterscotch and Friends the way it is now, back in 2021, Silent has served less of a purpose. Story wise, there is nothing note worthy that Silent has done. The focus has shifted where it's supposed to be: Mainly on Butterscotch.

Then I thought about it...when I first started Butterscotch and Friends, originally as a reset of my old Bendy AU, the ONLY reason I even brought Silent along was because I thought that if I didn't, Silent's old fans would riot. But it appears that the fanbase for Butterscotch and Friends is different from the fanbase for my old Bendy blog. More understanding, for one, and also more interested in Butterscotch and Finn rather than Silent.

I've also come to the realization that I have really no desire to write Silent as a character anymore, at least not for Butterscotch and Friends. When it comes to Butterscotch and Friends, I'm more interested in writing Butterscotch, Finn, Lottie, and Val.

So it is with a heavy heart that I have made a very tough decision.

From this day forward, I will be retiring Silent as a character in Butterscotch and Friends. I'm still holding on to Silent as a character and may use them in a separate project, but as far as THIS story goes, Silent no longer serves a purpose and therefore is being retired.

I am sorry to any old Silent fans this may upset, but as a writer I don't want to have characters around that don't serve any purpose. Especially not when they're SUPPOSED to be a main character like Silent was.

This is also a retcon. This change is making it so Silent never existed in the context of BAF, so if Butterscotch and Lottie receive any questions about them they're not gonna know who you're talking about.

TL;DR

Silent served a purpose back in the Bendy days, but doesn't serve a purpose in Butterscotch and Friends anymore, and is therefore being retired and retconned from the story.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Tuesday, August 13

Willow: Well, there's Scoobyage afoot. Giles called a meeting about our spankin' new menace. Tara: Oh ... y-you should go, they don't need me for that. You can fill me in. Willow: No, no, you have to come. This demon chick is supposed to be really powerful, and I was thinking. Maybe we could try that, that spell, you know, the one to find demons? Tara: That didn't work. Willow: Yeah ... but we only tried it once, and I-I think I got some ingredients wrong. Tara: Well, I-I'm tired. Maybe we can do it tomorrow? Willow: You sure you don't wanna- Tara: Look, my family's here, okay, I can't just- (pauses) Not everything is about your friends and stuff. Willow: Sorry. Tara: No! No, I mean... There's just so much ... going on. It's just ... I'm, I'm really tired. Willow: (nods) Okay. Tara: I'll see you in the morning. You can fill me in. Willow: Great. We'll be demon hunters.

~~Buffy Season 5 Episode #84: "Family"~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Danger in All Forms (Buffy, T, Harry Potter xover) by mmooch

Sugar and Spice (Faith/Wesley/Cordelia/Fred, T) by Kittenwritings

Task Mistress (CUT SCENES) (Buffy/Spike, E) by HappyWhenItRains

Shadows Of The Spotlight (Ensemble, E) by BlueZeroZeroOne

[Chaptered Fiction]

Don't Swerve Ch. 1-2/10 (Buffy/Faith, E) by thisyearsgrrl

Situation Normal - All Faithed Up Ch. 3 (Buffy/Faith, M) by QuillBard

Cheese Board Ch. 1/2 (Buffy/Riley, E) by TheClowniestLivInExistence

The Right Swipe Ch. 4 (Buffy/Giles, E) by DancingAngel0013

Home Movies Ch 25/25 (COMPLETE) (Buffy/Spike, E) by cawthraven

Midnight At The Lost & Found Ch. 2/10 (Buffy/Giles, T) by The_Crazy_Knight

Don't Swerve Ch. 2/10 (Buffy/Faith, E) by thisyearsgrrl

In the Company of Witches and Slayers Ch. 131/200 (Willow/Tara, E) by VladimirHarkonnen (TheLightdancer)

Casts Shadows CH. 1-17/17 (COMPLETE) (Ensemble, M, Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner Xover) by arcanedreamer

Along Came Two, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, T) by LilithSwan

East of Nevada, Chapter 14 (Buffy/Spike, M) by Blissymbolics

The Neighbor's Point of View, Chapter 121 (Buffy/Spike, G) by the_big_bad

Task Mistress, Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, E) by HappyWhenItRains

I Do!, Chapter 36 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Dusty

A Business Arrangement , Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Desicat

The Dark Fusion Ch. 13 (Xander, DCU xover) by LoneFrog

It’s a Secret Ch. 1/? (Xander, T, Harry Potter xover) by MsSunshine

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork:Buffy () by stateofdreaminn

Artwork:Spike () by bertolts

Artwork:Buffy () by tiaragloryart

[Reviews & Recaps]

PODCAST: Never Leave Me S7 E9 by Buffy and the Art of Story

PODCAST: Episode 37 - Taquitos, Kissing Toast, and Khaki Trousers (Faith, Hope, and Trick) by The Sunnydale Diaries

PODCAST: ATS 221 - Through The Looking Glass by Another Buffy Podcast

PODCAST: Episode 125: Gone by Mythtaken

[Community Announcements]

Tuesday: 100 Words on AUs by comment_fic

[Fandom Discussions]

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date Fashion Part Three by theoverlookedoneedits1997

Drusilla says “I see such pretty fire” by ceoazula

i love cordelia chase so so much by comradesummers

Obsessed w Joyce Summers’ wilful ignorance. by duckwnoeyes

The Pack Fashion Part One by theoverlookedoneedits1997

faith literally is into older women as we see with lilah morgan. by lesbianmarrow

actually, if you have any fun thoughts on Anyanka by darkwing-katy

Willow Rosenberg is the type of girl to mock Orpheus for turning around. by duckwnoeyes

I know we’ve discussed the Buffy/Faith dreams as like a shared space by 5bi5

David Boreanaz Talks The Buffyverse.And Importance To His Career by BAF

Xander’s Best Moment by theoriginalbabayaga

Her accent was a crime against the people of the Caribbean by nowlan101

Buffy Season 1 appreciation thread by jdpm1991

My new hill to die on by Calm_Cicada_8805

If Anya had a hen party/bachelorette party. What would happen by M_Partlett

In Surprise, why did Angel jump into the water after Buffy? Wrong answers only by ginime_

Rewatch Thoughts: Riley by Main-Kale-8383

I fell in love with her during this scene. (in a nice way) by sKullsHavezzz

What is one thing you think Buffy the Vampire Slayer did better than Angel? by SafiraAshai

Buffy and the Olympics by Snugglepuffs33

OMG James Is Amazing!! by StrawberryBlondiexox

Buffy’s most profound lines? by lokeyvigilante

Halloween episode season 2 by JewelerDear9233

Becoming part 2 - season 2 by Anonymous

does anyone know how the gift was filmed? by brian5mbv

Cordelia and Connor by Worth_Wallaby5387

Sanshu confusion by bankruptbusybee

Buffy + Angel by Electrical-Host-8526

Most Hated Buffy Character by Think_Web_1353

The Anointed One by nym5

I guess I’ve always been slow on the uptake. by spectacularfreak

And the most adorable BTVS moment award goes to… by No-Grapefruit8778

Team Spuffy or Team Bangel by gamerrat_13

I wish I had even a 10th of the audacity in real life that Cordelia has in every scene by nowlan101

Which revoke invitation spell was more humbling? by InfiniteMehdiLove

The body by Medical-Delivery-439

Veruca by bitchhhcrafttt

What would Buffy from the show think of Pike from the movie if they met? by jdpm1991

S5 E12 by Main-Kale-8383

Season 4 by rickytractor

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: David Boreanaz Would Be Open to Returning to the World of Buffy and Angel by CBR

PUBLICATION: 10 Buffy the Vampire Slayer Moments That Hit Different in 2024 by MovieWeb

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Join the editor team :)

[pumpkin-spike18]

✨Weekly Progress 2024 #22-23✨

#22 would've come out last week if I didn't forget my planner when I packed for traveling.

Weekly Progress #22

Updated tumblr tags

Thumbnailed, sketched, refined sketched, lined, and finished [fan project #2] illustration

Submitted forms for [fan projects]

Made work plans for P-M and SFB

Basic o2a2 outline

Fixed SYVNH bug

Generated sprite pieces for P-M and SFB

Fleshed out o2a2 outline

Weekly Progress #23

Coded P-M sprites

Updated itch page images

Made new BWBOK schedule

Copied P-M script into Renpy

Scripted P-M s1-s3

Answered BWBOK comments

Drafted [fan project] posts

Designed P-M GUI

Wrote 100+ words for SFB

A Sky of Falling Birds

As I mentioned before, SFB is my next big project, which I plan to submit for BAF VN Jam. That's... 7/1.

It's okay, I still got... 20 days.

There's a lot of work left to do and not much to show off at the moment.

Pre-Make

Or Pre 🕰 Make (P-M), I haven't completely decided on how to advertise the title yet. It's a "small" project that I came up with back in 2020 and still haven't finished. I thought I'd dedicate a few days' time to it and see how far I'd get. There's still a bit of work to do, but much of it is done.

The art's quite old and the story telling was the original test I did for SYVNH's looping mechanism so it won't be anything novel. The screenshot above is from this game. If he looks a little familiar, don't worry. That's not your imagination.

The Beauty Which Only Beast Knows

My other big focus for this month, we're hoping to finish it for Otome Jam... which also ends 7/1. I've a loose schedule for achieving that, but the team's health is the top priority so we're playing it by ear. It may take a little longer to finish up.

Other!

O2A2: Because I couldn't sit still!! I started planning for O2A2 2024! It'll be another entry into the kill series, but I hope to include some point and click elements to it. Last year I finished 9 VN projects, something I don't want to do again-- but!! I don't want to only finish one project this year!! I've been skipping and fomo-ing all the jams in the first half of the year. Well, no more! I'm going to get some work done this summer!!

Fan Projects: I don't think I need to keep my involvement in fan projects a secret anymore! I took part in the D. Gray Man 20th Anniversary Project, which we actually started work on late last year! I also took part in the Narumitsu Big Bang 2024 event, which... also started work late last year 🤔 Huh, I was really busy back then. Maybe that'll teach me to sign up for too many fan events... (😂 no ofc not!)

Misc: I finished some tedious updating work that I promised myself to do a while back. I'll admit I make my blog easiest for me to navigate, first and foremost. But if there's something that's bothering you, or have an idea to make navigation better, feel free to let me know through an ask! I also updated all of my itch io pages' images. They were originally linked from discord, which changed its policy and broke all direct image links. Thankfully, I had everything labeled in a private server so I could easily retrieve and reupload to update the pages. Yes, I should've done that long ago. And I'm sorry I just... didn't;;

[soupy-girl]

💛Smoshblr December Asks Day 19💙

What are your top 3 fave/dream cast constellations for smosh vids? (so typically 4-6 people each)

Bonus: What are your top 3 smosh ships?

1. sword af/ baf legacy crew u will always be famous! they are iconic i will not be hearing otherwise

2. triple a + chanse and courtney and/or shayne (so the love is blind video is actually peak cinema to me)

3. boysss night!! (chanse, shayne damien, spencer and tommy) i don’t think a video of all of them actually exists but based on the party animals and other games vids it would slay and needs to happen urgently

as for ships…

1. the ship that single handedly brought me back to writing fics… spommy ofc!

2. kimney (they actually are gfs sorry i don’t make the rules)

3. amangela (if kimney are gfs amangela are an old married couple and i love that for them!)

[carolmunson]

ok so my favourite eddie of yours is soft!eddie x baf!gf and i just wanted to know, what do you think is like, the breaking point of the relationship (if there ever is one) like where eddie is sick of not being able to get through to reader and she doesn’t try anymore. after he went with her to the bar to see her ex i think he’s a bit more understanding of why she’s the way she is and obviously he���s a great guy anyway but do you think there’s a point where it becomes too much for him (apart from what happens in buttercup, baby) or will he ever get through to her? he seems to want/need communication for it to work but she isn’t there for that and would rather stay silent

(sorry that was so long ignore me if i’m annoying)

not annoying!

i guess i don't fully have an answer. bad at feelings is like, truly such a self insert and is mostly just a way for me to navigate my own feelings (or lack their of) in relationships and relationships i've actually been in. they obviously deeply love each other and eddie is so truly passionate about being with reader and does his best to understand her and adjusts himself to best suit her needs. but i think at the same time, reader never really does that for him or offers him the same kindness because she feels like she doesn't have to since she was dealt such a bad hand in relationships before (lmao ME). and i think that eventually would really wear on eddie, feeling like his own needs aren't being met because he's so consumed with making sure hers are -- but what's worse is that she doesn't actually know her own needs, so he's coming up short each time.

i think if baf!gf took the time to process her shit and they learned to communicate better (much like how they discuss at the end of le dome de verre where she also gets uncomfortable because she doesn't want to have needs), and she was able to give more, they'd be in a much better place. so i don't wanna say they're end game or that they're gonna break up (since it's really an all over the place collection of vingettes and not really a solid series), but that there's just parts of their relationship that are harder than others.

idk, feelings are weird guys!

[mithliya]

I could definitely be wrong, but as an autistic person I honestly read the 'different language' thing as just an expression of how it feels to be autistic, not insulting your English. The way my thoughts connect to each other in my head and come out of my mouth is so different from the way they do for people who aren't autistic, and it really does feel like speaking a whole different language. Trying to get people to understand what I'm saying is very difficult and I do have to apologize and clarify a lot, and honestly, it does get exhausting, because a lot of people will refuse to believe what I actually meant because the words I said didn't translate into that for them the way it did for me and it's hard for them to understand that what obviously means one thing to them obviously means another thing to me.

Not saying macro is in the right here, but I also read you saying the part about things 'leading to the conclusion that' as you stating the conclusion as something that you believed to be true--in hindsight and after your explanation, I realize that was a silly way to read it, but it happens so often that I'm more wary of it. I don't think anyone here is intentionally misinterpreting words; this kind of misunderstanding isn't uncommon for autistic people. It's just a pile of misunderstandings.

I started talking way too much, but my point is, I think that was what the 'different language' thing meant--the child comment was uncalled for, but I don't think it was about your English at all. Again, though, I could be wrong.

Hopefully I worded all of this in a way that 'translates' properly. I'm a little tired so stringing words together is harder than it is normally, so if any of this came off wrong, I'm very sorry. I'm honestly not trying to take sides here, I don't feel like I know enough about the whole situation to make any solid judgments on it, I'm just trying to help clear up the misunderstandings because I'm very familiar with how easy it is for these things to happen. Also, I always enjoy seeing you on my timeline, you seem like a cool person and I don't want you to maybe feel hurt over something that came off wrong. (Though in this context, it really should have been worded differently.) Obviously I don't know how you're actually feeling about it, but, well, insults are hurtful. Sorry for stating the incredibly obvious there, like I said my words are not forming well.

Sorry for the very long ask. Hope you're doing well!

but afaik butch-reid'd is not autistic as well is she? i can understand though bc very often im saying things and it feels like people are somehow reading entirely different (which is what they just did to me, funnily enough) but i wish theyd perhaps avoid such comments with me bc seriously the amount of times this week alone that people have made weird comments to me about my english or language abilities is .. too much. i ignored it bc of that bc i was like what is up with this comment why do peopl keep saying things about my language abilities to me -_-

anyways im mostly frustrated now that even after explaining at least twice that i am simply saying that people reading ur words literally does not mean theyre out to get u and trying to misconstrue u and whatever else, & its ok to simply correct them and move on, theyre now intentionally misconstruing me to call me ableist lol. like im supposed to give everything they say the most generous interpretation ever, but even when im clarifying my words repeatedly i dont deserve the same.. its odd. especially when i dont think im saying anything unreasonable when i say "people arent intentionally misconstruing you by reading ur words as they are literally written, youre simply wording them unclearly & can clarify it and then move on. if it requires knowing u personally and already having positive feelings towards u to understand what ur saying as u intend it then it is simply unclear"

anyways thank u anon and i appreciate hearing ur input <3 im just baffled by how i was trying to politely explain sth to them and i got repeated insults in return

[missmorosis]

SIKE

u suck so bad

i think ur favorite thing is to hate on me

for what FOR WHAT

[concerningwolves]

Hey I'm doing a short story for class about an autistic girl who discovers she have telekinesis and I want to knows how to portray her properly and how beint autustic affect her powets with makint autism sounds baf

Hi anon! I’m very sorry if I’m answering this too late for you; I barely had time to even look at my inbox in October and November, and then when I got time to do so this month, I got overwhelmed by the backlog. Nonetheless, I’ll answer this and hope that even if it’s too late for your original purpose, something in it will help you (/help anyone else who reads this) :]

AUTISM, SUPERPOWERS & FAIR REPRESENTATION

Okay, so, the basic answer to “how not to make autism sound bad” is approach the story with compassion and/or empathy – but that’s a very broad answer and probably not overly helpful for specifics. I’ll start with the “how to represent autism well” part and then break down the superpower-specific stuff from there.

1) Autism should be an integral part of your characters’ personhood, but not their entire personality

As an autistic, I struggle to define where my autism ends and my personhood (i.e., my sense of the “self”) begins, because they’re so deeply entwined with one another.  Autism is a condition that alters how I think and interact with the world, and therefore profoundly impacts how I perceive both myself and the things around me. That doesn’t mean, however, that my only personality trait is autism. It all gets very convoluted and existential – would I still be ‘me’ if you removed autism? What is ‘me’? Is it even fair to think of autism as a separate Thing? – but it is worth considering if you want to get inside your autistic character’s head.

A trap that allistic creators tend to fall into is “this character likes [X] / does [X] because they are autistic”. For example, I once saw someone say that their OC likes blue because it’s a calming colour and therefore sensory-safe. This is a valid process on its own: I also like pale blue (+ other pastel shades) because it’s a sensory-safe colour! But where many allistics fall down is in not considering that an autistic character’s likes, dislikes and hobbies don’t have to relate to their autism.

Although the show has its flaws, I do think that Sam Gardener from Netflix’s Atypical is a positive example of an autistic character just liking something because they like it. His special interest is all to do with penguins and antartic wildlife/explorations, and he also enjoys art as a hobby because... he just does. That’s not to say these things don’t intersect – he takes a scientific illustration class in college precisely because it combines two things he likes; it’s also fair to say that autism gives him an edge in drawing because autism brain is excellent at grasping theory/technicalities. But ultimately it’s nice to have an autistic character whose interests and personality traits go beyond the stereotypical special interest.

For more on representing autistic characters, check out [this post] where I go into a bit more depth. (NOTE: that post is on my list of things that I want to revise/rewrite/flesh out, so it might change soon, but the basic stuff is still the same).

2) Autism isn’t inherently “bad” – but that doesn’t mean it’s without issues, either

Autism is not the devastating tragedy that neurotypicals like to present, but it does come with its own difficulties and pitfalls that you should acknowledge if you want to write a well-rounded autistic character. There’s often discourse/debates on my dash about whether it’s fair to call autism a disability. I’d say it is – there are definitely aspects of autism that are disabling, i.e., sensory overload, burnout, trouble communicating, etc. – but it isn’t a disability in the way that allistics/abled people think.  

Some aspects of autism are “double edged”, in that they have useful and troublesome sides. Speaking for myself, hyper-empathy means that I’m good at grasping why emotions Do The Thing, which is incredibly useful in filling in gaps in my social sense! But. It also means that I struggle to draw a line between my own emotions and someone else’s, and am simply awful at creating healthy emotional boundaries. As the writer, you create good representation by showing both sides. Let your character have meltdowns! Let them have trouble in social situations! Let them get burnt out or overwhelmed! But also make sure to show that this doesn’t make them inherently burdensome to other characters, and explore the good/neutral aspects of autism, too.

3) So, how would all of this impact superpowers?

A lot of that depends on your world’s magic/superpower system. Some things to consider are:

Does your character need to be concentrating?

Do emotions influence how controlled the power is?

Does the power take a physical or mental toll on the user?

etc.

These are laws you ought to think about as part of worldbuilding, regardless of a characters’ neurotype or ability, but I do believe that autism will have an impact on how a character interacts with their powers. For example, many autistic people have difficulty with fine motor skills and spatial awareness, either as part of autism or due to a co-existing condition [1]. This could theoretically cause trouble if a character needs to gauge personal space/use spatial perception when using telekinesis to direct objects. Where emotions effect a power, emotional dysregulation or rejection sensitive dysphoria could also come into play by disrupting a characters’ concentration or control. 

Make sure to show your character working with or around these sorts of issues, and keep a balance between the pros and cons. If sensory input throws off her concentration, what are ways she can get around that? Earplugs for noise, dark glasses for light sensitivity, seamless clothes, headphones... etc etc. On the more negative side, I can only imagine the chaos I might cause during a meltdown if I had telekinesis: objects flying everywhere, lightbulbs bursting, general pandemonium. That said, telekinesis would be great if I could levitate myself and just hang there without any sensory input. Also useful if I needed to get stuff and didn’t have the energy to move because of burnout, or if I could use telekinesis to “weigh down” a blanket on top of me during meltdowns. There are some really fun possibilities here! 

Another way to avoid showing autism as a burden/something bad is to give your character a support network and/or accommodations in the story. Have your character find ways to work around issues just like a neurotypical person would, yes, but also have other characters be understanding and ready to help. Thriving support systems are just as important as the autistic character themself.

Basically, address the fact that some aspects of autism are difficult to cope with/require aid but don't overtly focus on that, you know? Your character can get upset, frustrated, or be resigned. She can beat herself up! All autistic people live with this feeling of "not good enough". But show her overcoming this, show her with a good support system, and show her being a person as complex and developed as any other character.

FOOTNOTE(S)

[1] general practise in diagnostic circles is to avoid diagnosing with things like dyspraxia if another developmental disorder is present (i.e., autism), but we’re still learning about what the big ice-cream bar of autism actually covers. What traits an autistic person has can vary hugely from one person to another.

[nagitokomaedapizzasuitarchive]

[original copypasta here]

Discovered this godforsaken copypasta recently and immediately thought of this.

-- Please do not repost this. Reblogs heavily appreciated!!

“why dont you take showers” um not once🔂 have🈶 ℹ️iℹ️ℹ️ ever heard🇭🇲 a🅰️ actual 🉑good 🉑🉑 reasonable reason for people👦 to shower🛁. p- showering🛁- people👥, people👶 🛁shower🛁🛁 bcuz 🇮🇹its🇮🇹 a🅰️ trend 📉 .. 👦people 👦 📺shower📺 bcuz its🇮🇹🇮🇹 a 🅰️ trend📉 ....... its🇮🇹 not something that needs to be done🔨, its🇮🇹 not somethin that we can- its🇮🇹 not somethin 💒like💒 drinkin food 🍙 or 🌊water🌊 its🇮🇹 not somethin that we— im sorry💔 its🇮🇹 not something that we actually need its🇮🇹 somethin that people👶 do its🇮🇹🇮🇹 a🅰️ trend📉. people 👥👥 do it🇮🇹 bc other people 👱 do it🇮🇹🇮🇹 🅰️a🅰️ lot of things ppl do bcuz other people👫 do it 🇮🇹 to be honest 👪people👪 like 💙 to follow the 📉trend📉 🆘so🆘 when ℹ️iℹ️ℹ️ was doin it 🇮🇹 and everybody else was doin it🇮🇹 like 💕 iℹ️ wanna do it🇮🇹🇮🇹 ℹ️iℹ️ want to fit in iℹ️ℹ️ wanna do it 🇮🇹 its🇮🇹 just kinda like💓💓 w jordan🇯🇴 👢shoes👢 😦what😦 is so🆘 speshul abt 🇯🇴jordan🇯🇴 shoos💨 and me myself ℹ️iℹ️ was guilty of it 🇮🇹 bc iℹ️ used to want it🇮🇹. 🆘so🆘 ℹ️iℹ️ remember i ℹ️ was desperate 🕑2 🕑🕑 get🉐 some jordan🇯🇴 shoes👠 and iℹ️ when ℹ️i ℹ️ℹ️ 🉐got 🉐 them them bitches was ugly but i ℹ️ still wore em just to fit in so🆘🆘 ℹ️i ℹ️ lost that mentality 🅰️a🅰️ long mf time🕓 ago fuck fittin in fuck what😦 ppl think💭 but yk everybody has🈶 the mentality of wantin to follow the 📉trend 📉📉 so🆘 thats y 🅰️a🅰️ lot of ppl do it🇮🇹 and im speakin fax 📠 even🌜 tho ppl r gonna laff ppl r gonna think 💭 iℹ️ sound 📢 dumb im speakin fax 📠📠 cuz 🤔think🤔 🕝2 🕝 urself u🇺🇸 have🈶🈶 to think💭 2️⃣22️⃣ urself why do iℹ️ showr why do iℹ️ baf why do iℹ️ do it🇮🇹 what 😦😦 am iℹ️ gettin outta doin this a🅰️-am iℹ️ℹ️ going 22️⃣ starve if ℹ️iℹ️ dont take a🅰️ baf am iℹ️ going 2🕑 💀die 💀 if iℹ️ dont take a🅰️ baf 🇮🇹its🇮🇹 not a🅰️ necarity like💚💚 food 🍈 and 🚿water🚿 basically 🇻🇮u🇻🇮🇻🇮 just wastin ur own water 🚱 💷bill💷 bc 🇺🇸u🇺🇸 wanna fit in and ion understand it🇮🇹 bcuz ppl dont know if 🇻🇮u🇻🇮 🚿shower 🚿 or not anyways they cannot tell they cannot from adam and eve if 🇻🇮u🇻🇮 take bafs or if 🇻🇮u🇻🇮 shower🛁 or not 🆘so🆘 y are 🇺🇸u🇺🇸 doing it 🇮🇹 just to fit in and ppl dont even🌓 know if ur rly doin 🇮🇹it 🇮🇹 or not so🆘🆘 .. thats all i ℹ️ gotta say abt that .. think💭 abt what😦 i ℹ️ said for ppl thats constantly wastin their water 🚱🚱 bill💵 ... might actually save💾 urself some money🏦 .. same question❔ “why dont u🇺🇸 take showers” issa 📉trend📉📉 and im not with followin the 📉trends 📉 wif everybody else ....... ℹ️iℹ️ℹ️ actually see👀👀 about five 5️⃣- fiVe questions⁉️ in a🅰️ row asking 🙏 me that same thing 🙏asking🙏 that question❔ 😷ill 😷 click 🔛on🔛 asking🙏 that psh five5️⃣ questions ⁉️ like😻😻 uh- 💏like💏 almost all my questions ❔ ask🙏🙏 that. “why are you always bleeding?” iℹ️ actually don’t know iℹ️ guess its🇮🇹 just — tsk ℹ️iℹ️ don’t know ℹ️i ℹ️ don’t know i ℹ️ do bleed a 🅰️ lot ill😷 bleed 🅰️a 🅰️ lot like💏 a🅰️ lot so🆘 haha 🙈🙈 iℹ️ don’t know i’m actually bleeding ▶️right ▶️ know so🆘 ℹ️iℹ️ don’t know “ when was the last time🕡 🇺🇸u🇺🇸 showered 🚿?” January

[blueikeproductions]

Cyberverse remains a fascinating little isolation to me. It doesn't appear to be that popular at all, outside of its budding fan base, heck it seems to be outright failing in Japan, and yet I see people parading it around as if it's the next Beast Wars. I don't particularly understand why. I can see it was a show made with love, but the story telling is all over the place. Character motivations don't make sense, pacing is all off, the weird obsession with trying (and failing) to make Megatron a hero fallen from grace like IDW? It all feels very amateurish, but devoid of the charm of a fan made product.

I do kinda feel bad for the staff as they tried their best, but were saddled with half of a half of a shoestring budget. On top of being way too ambitious, Cyberverse feels bloated with big ideas that barely go anywhere but horribly rushed to fit the 10 minute mark.

To their credit I think they did manage to tell a decent story with the Quintesson arc, as it feels like that's what they wanted to do in the first place. The lack of interest in the usual Autobot/Decepticon conflict is apparent up until now, as they clearly wanted an IDW style Anti-Vocationist League vs Functionists thing instead. It works, but it feels a bit clunky. Hot Rod and Soundwave as the Bot/Con leaders during the conflict was neat though and refreshing.

On top of a lot of post war stuff that just... kind of happens rather than feeling meaningful.

Cyberverse feels like yet another kids show trying desperately to appeal to adults despite saying for its for kids and it shows. Kids largely want nothing to do with. I see more kids look at Studio Series or Bakugan instead. Toys are constantly on clearance or are peg warming. Even discount stores like TJ Max couldn't get rid of them. The Alpha Trions had a sizable layer of dust on them! Despite Hasbro trying to capitalize on the apparent adult audience CV cultivated with the BAF line, general reports I get point to it shelf warming hard too. Those weird sets with the Quintessons and Monsterbots at Target we're whittled down to three bucks! No one is buying the toys, I'm sorry. Despite trying to trick kids by making Bumblebee the focus in the third phase, it's laughable because the yellow guy isn't even in the show much by that point. It's like Beast Hunters and Combiner Force all over again. And I imagine that will repeat itself in the next thing since it appears to be a trend now.

The only people I saw actively buying them were the show creators, and the same staff had to practically BEG the fans to support the show leagally back when people were pirating the final season. I don't think many listened and most who loved or hated it pirated the show and moved on to Siege, barely looking back.

while I do appreciate the show for trying some new spins here and there, (I rather liked how Maccadam/Alchemist Prime was a fun character, and Quintesson Starscream was neat to name a few) I think the cons outweigh the pros, and I think the fan base is slowly starting to forget about CV now that Netflix WFC is underway (mind you the general attitude is mixed to negative there too, but people seem much more happy with it than CV by leaps and bounds).

I can only hope for the moving forward, but despite the show/toys' reception being Meh to lukewarm at best, there's a rumor the next show is going to still be helmed by largely the same crew. I hope you like losing money, HasTak, because you're gonna be strapped for it if you keep going this route. (And I say this about Netflix WFC too).

with tighter writing, a better end goal, and giving the staff an ACTUAL BUDGET, Cyberverse really could've been great and worthy of its praise. Same with the toyline.

So I can only hope the toy quality improves for the next kid show thing, and offers a plot and characters kids actually WANT. Kids are sticking to the movies and RiD15 from what I saw when it comes to Transformers, so maybe combine aspects of those two if you want your target audience back.

[heythrrdelilah]

In the Dark (Sam Winchester x Reader) Chapter 4

Warnings: Violence, fluff, food, mention of sex, tension

Word Count: 3,647

A/N: I’m sorry this took so long, I’ve been extremely busy and let this fic slip past me. I hope this chapter makes up for it. I am always open to suggestions on how to improve or ideas for the future, just send them in the ask and for which fic! I do throw in some stuff for Dean lovers here and there too. 

Chapter 3 can be found here

Chapter 4

“Wow,” You gloomily replied, “I’m sorry to hear about your parents. I could never imagine watching your brother go through all of that or even what you have been through, all these years.” He half smiled in response, “It’s not so bad. You learn to appreciate the things going right for you.” His words were wise. You often lived by that statement, coming from a bad background yourself. You nod and move to look out to the balcony. The view from your room wasn’t great but it was still breathtaking. You opened the glass sliding door and peered out at the mountains. The night sky met the snowy peaks,  along with lights from the skii lodge. It looked like a scene from a movie. 

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?” You finally speak with a sigh. You felt a fabric being placed gently over your shoulders. You looked down to see Sam had placed your jacket around you. He seemed too sweet for this line of work. Hunters normally have a cold breeze in their gaze,  a glimmer of loss. Sams stare felt warm. So warm,  in fact,  that you weren’t able to feel the brisk winter night outside just by looking at him. Your statement seemed to take him by surprise in the silence,  "uh-oh… the view. Yeah.“ He looked out to the mountains,  then back at you. "I’m really sorry about Dean,” He spoke placing an arm against the opening of the door. You shook your head,  “Sam,  you’re not responsible for his behavior. He’s actually acting pretty normal for a hunter. I mean,  come on,  I’m solo. Even if he weren’t acting like every other big headed hunter who thinks he’s responsible to be the world’s savior, I presume,  it’s not on you. Shake the weight off.” You nudge his side,  laughing and shaking your arms. He looked down at you and chuckled. “You’re cute, ” He spat out without hesitation. Your eyes widened for a moment before you looked back to the mountains, “Not so bad yourself Winchester." 

The next moment happened so quickly,  that you weren’t even fully conscious of the situation as it was happening. Sam’s lips were soft to pair with the lingering flavor of a vanilla latte. It felt as if the pair of lips against yours,  fit like a puzzle piece. However,  after a few short,  too short,  seconds,  Sam’s lips were pulled away,  but the ghost touch had lasted a few seconds more. The look in his eyes were apologetic. "I’m sorry. You seem like a careful person and I didn’t mean to break a boundary. I usually don’t do… that. We just met. I’m-” You cut off his rambling with a tug on his shirt. Him being taller than you,  you had to have him lean down and what better way than to pull his shirt?  You placed a gentle peck on his cheek,  closed the sliding glass door,  and turned the TV on in the room.  

“No worries.  I don’t normally kiss back. Guess you have an effect on me, ” Did you admit that out loud?  What had gotten into you?  Too late now,  you thought to yourself,  might as well embrace it. He chuckled,  sitting on your bed,  "yeah… I would have to say the same.“ You flipped through the TV,  trying to ignore any awkward silence. Nothing was on. Hunters come and go. Always on the move. Even if you did act on your sudden liking to Sam,  he would be gone after this job. You have heard of the infamous Winchester brothers before, any hunter who hadn’t would be lying. They have saved the world several times and are humble about doing so. For you to be on a case with the Winchesters was intimidating,  but it was only for a short time. You had to remember that before allowing this crush to form into something deeper. “Y/N, I think I’m going to go back to my room. Meet downstairs for some coffee in the morning?” Sam asked, pushing himself off of your bed and making his way to the door. You nod once, then return back to flipping through channels. It must have been late,  because of the fact that only one channel was not running infomercials,  but it was Gilmore Girl Reruns. 

Just as the episode was halfway through, a knock came on your hotel door. You walked over and opened to a nervous Sam. "So,  Dean found company and locked me out of our room,” He was scratching his neck,  chuckling nervously. You stepped to the side,  allowing him an entry and closed the door behind the both of you.  "You can have the bed,  just give me a pillow and the comforter, “ You reached for the pillow and placed it on the floor. He shook his head,  "no. That’s not very gentlemanly of me. I’ll take the floor.” You flicked your brow at him,  "I offered. So take the bed,“ You demanded. He raised his hands up in defeat.  "Can we change the show though? I don’t really care for the Gilmore clan,” He reached for the remote but you snatched it off of the bed first.  

You looked between the tv and him.  This is the episode Dean and Rory are fighting over the fact Dean likes the idea of a house wife. You saw a shocking resemblance between Sam and this Dean character. You paused the cable TV. “Sam,  is it because you kind of look like the Dean character?” You teased making a fake pout. He shook his head,  rolling his eyes,  "no I don’t now give me that.“ He reached for the remote but you pulled it away quickly,  pointing at the screen. "Yeah I think you’re right,  Dean character is cuter, ” You teased, smiling with raised eyebrows. He reached for the remote and you turned to have your back facing him. He reached around you,  his muscular arms almost wrapped completely around your torso,  which meant he was leaning over. He grabbed the remote from your grip but wrapped his arms around you anyways. 

As quickly as they were placed there,  they were removed,  though you wish they weren’t. “Uh,  I’m going to shower. Change the channel. I’ll even pay for something On Demand,” You quickly moved to your bags and pulled out your makeup baf that held your face wash,  toothbrush,  toothpaste,  and makeup. Then you pulled out your fuzzy pajama pants and oversized T-shirt. You rushed to the bathroom and locked the door. You leaned your back against the door and starred up to the ceiling,  remembering the warm embrace that was just upon you. 

Your stomach fluttered and you attempted to physically shake that feeling off. Sam made you nervous,  which meant you were vulnerable. To a complete stranger. He was nice,  intelligent so far,  and extremely attractive. However,  yes,  he was a stranger. A stranger who you let sleep in your room. You weren’t sure if it was from the anger at yourself  or intrusively inappropriate thoughts that came along with Sam,  but you were heating up and needed to jump in the shower to cool off. 

Unlike most women,  you showered rather quickly. The washing your face time part took the longest, as you had a 7 step skincare routine. You cleaned up after yourself,  but left your skin care and make up bag in the bathroom,  before exiting. Sam was lounged on the bed watching Gilmore Girls, smart phone in hand. You gave him permission to shower and lay down on the floor,  snuggled into the blankets. After the long drive today, you fell asleep almost instantly. 

The next morning,  you woke up on the bed,  the sun shining bright in the room around you. You leaned across the bed and looked to the floor. Sam was passed out with only a pillow and his jacket as a blanket. You hopped out of bed and began your morning routine, quickly getting ready and changing into your pencil skirt and blazer. When you walked out of the bathroom, Sam had been standing by the balcony, stretching his long limbs. “Good morning. Why did you move me? Touching people in their sleep is kind of creepy, you know that right?” You walked over to your suitcase. He furrowed his brows, tilted his head like a puppy before understanding what you had meant. “I picked you up. You looked uncomfortable. Coffee?” He asked, placing his phone in his pocket. You nod, grabbing your phone, fake badge, and notepad placing them into your purse. 

When the two of you reached the lobby cafe,  you were engrossed in conversation about a previous demon hunt you experienced and hadn’t even noticed you were next in line. Talking to Sam was simply,  that easy. 

You ordered your black coffee and found a table in the corner of the room,  Sam close behind you with a box of pastries. You pulled your phone out and scrolled,  finding the names of the potential pack members. “Sammy,  where did you crash last night?  Impala?” Dean pats Sam’s back and sits in the chair next to Sam. He had a coffee in his hand. “Good morning,  no. (Y/N)  let me take the floor, ” Sam explained,  opening the pastry box. “I didn’t know what you like so I got one of everything. Muffins,  don-” His display was cut off by Dean snatching a donut out of the box,  chuckling loudly. He took a violent bite out of the lemon blazed donut and looked between the both of you,  laughing now. “What?” Sam asked,  picking up a banana nut muffin.  Dean laughed the entire donut away,  grabbed a chocolate cake donut,  and finally explained,  "I didn’t know Kim Possible here was the type. Atta boy Sam.“ Your brows raised in an instant.  You most definitely were not the type he was referring to. "Not like that. She wanted the floor,” Sam interjected,  pushing the pastry box towards you. You shook your head at the both of them,  "I’m going to interview the staff. Before I do so,  any insight from night crew, Dean? Other than your ..er..babysitter?“ He smirked for a moment and retorted,  "she say alright. Just not on a baby.” You stood up from the table as Sam let out a “gross,” Between muffin bites. 

“No. The chef at the rooftop resturaunt was mysteriously off of work a little early the night of the attack, though. Bet you didnt see that on the schedule?  Someone punched out for him.  Think you’re miss all that, still?” He smirked,  seemingly proud of himself. You rolled your eyes,  placed the glass mug on the return to kitchen rack,  and made your way to the rooftop resturaunt. 

The dining room was elegantly designed,  their awards tucked nearly in glass cases all around the round tables. A chandelier hanging from the middle of the room,  dim lighting even at this early time. You flashed your badge at the hostess and demanded to see the chef. You must have spoken a bit too loud however,  because you heard a scream come from the kitchen. You ran back,  grabbing a silver knife from a table along the way. The hostess stumbled behind you. You turned to the scared brunette and told her that the only way she could help is to get your partners from the cafe downstairs. 

There was no time to wait for the Winchesters,  you burst into the kitchen and saw the chef leaning over a bloody body. The sous chef. The man was large,  muscular,  and wearing a white chef coat. When he spotted you,  the anger in his eyes penetrated your soul. It was game on.  He lunged toward you,  pressing you against the wall. The force knocked the wind out of you,  but you held tight to the knife,  ready to swing,  but the wolf man behind him had other plans. You noticed it was the man you told Sam about last night. He was coming after you,  you were cornered. The door burst open once more and the two men that now appeared,  was a blessing. How they had gone to their car,  gotten their weapons,  and made there way up here this quick was shocking. 

With a loud bang,  the employee was down. You used your free leg,  grunting and using all your strength,  to kick the chef in the groin.  When he bent down you jammed the silver knife into his temporalis muscle,  right through the skull. He landed with q loud crash. The Winchester brothers stood back impressed with how quickly you managed to kill this beast. You shrugged,  wiping yourself off of dust and straightened your skirt. “Thanks for the help boys, ” You began grabbing the body by the wrists. The worst part about this job was the clean up,  well other than the telling families and seeing death parts. 

After the clean up,  you and the Winchesters were in the back alley of the resort,  leaned up against their Impala. “So,  you men off to save the world again or do you have time for another coffee?  I owe you one for saving me and I booked two nights because I didnt know how long it would take us,” You asked,  pushing yourself off of the car. The guys nodded and followed you back into the cafe,  where you ordered a coffee once more.

 "You should eat something,“ Sam motioned towards the box of pastries he bought again. You shook your head and sipped your coffee, ” Thanks but I’m good.“ Dean grunted,  rolling his eyes and grabbed the pumpkin spice donut from the box.  "So where are you off too? Im sure you Winchester guys have bigger fish to fry,” You sipped your coffee and watched as Sam placed a Nutella croissant on a napkin and place it in front of you. You left it in its place.  “Well,  we do normally. But we kind of saved the world for good now. So we are back to tiny hunter to keep us sane,” Dean explained,  grabbing a canole from the box. Dean seemed to finally be warming up to you. 

“So maybe we will catch you again on another hunt, ” Sam smiled warmly at the idea before biting into a blueberry lemon ginger muffin. Dean rolled his eyes,  “bro if you like her, I’m okay with, ” He was attempting to keep his voice low about it and failing. Sam began fidgeting with the muffin,  blushing nervously,  hoping you couldn’t hear his brother. Dean began,  "we can ask her if she wants to… Join the team for a bit.“ You couldn’t pretend you didn’t hear this any longer. Letting out a giggle and feeling your face burn red,  you responded,  "I wouldn’t want to intrude. I’m also, a loner kind of girl.” Sam quickly interjected,  "no. I mean you wouldn’t be intruding.  Do you have a permanent home?  Where do you go if you can’t find cases? Blow your money on motels?“ 

He created a good argument,  "not exactly… my money. No,  I don’t have a permanent home and if there are no cases,  motel vacancies,  or money,  I sleep in my car. Old yeller and I ride well.” Sam shook his head in response,  he was chuckling so it definitely was not judgement. 

“We have a bunker. A home. We have plenty of rooms and it’s hidden,” Dean grunted showing that he was annoyed by the idea. You felt pretty overwhelmed and you had just met these guys.  However,  they did save your life and if they were going to harm you they would have done it already. 

After a long moment of silence,  you agreed to join them only after you got your money’s worth of the room tonight. “When’s the last time you boys had some innocent fun? Not bars or women?” The two men looked at each other dumbfounded and shrugged at you. You motioned for them to follow you as you stood up from the table. Sam gripped your wrist and pointed at the croissant,  “eat this and we have a deal.” You began to argue but he furrowed a brow to show how serious he was. 

You sat down at the table with a slight hint of attitude. You picked up the croissant and let the flavors of hazelnut and chocolate explode in your mouth. The buttery flakes of the croissant were the perfect mixture of flaky and doughy along with the chocolate-hazelnut ratio,  this was a perfect croissant. After you finished,  you felt extremely full,  but finished your coffee before standing up and ordering a to-go cup of coffee. 

“You are going to have a stomach issue if you don’t eat and only drink coffee. Take care of yourself so you don’t get medical bills in the future, ” Sam spoke concerned as you made your way to the front desk of the hotel. You flashed your badge to the clerk and leaned onto the counter,  acting exhausted,  "my partners and I have caught the perp, we were thinking about taking a break,  but saw the skiing guests and thought… “ You left a pause for the dark haired scrawny male behind the counter. Falling right into your trap, "let me see if we have three spots for full equipment rentals.” You turned to the shocked Winchesters and flicked a brow with a smirk as if bragging. the clerk frowned,  “I see that we don’t have any slope spots open today,  but we do have three full access spa spots,  let me see your badge or IDs and I’ll have them set up,  free of charge.” You smirked to the men as you all three placed your IDs on the counter. 

“Maybe I can get used to a chick riding along with us,” Dean laughed,  biting into a bagel from the box he was carrying around. “What?  You’re excited about the spa?  Isn’t it too… girly for a man of your taste?” You flicked a brow and walked over to the stairs.  "Well,  as long as you stick with us,  you’ll know Dean likes to take care of himself,“ Sam laughed,  pulling you to the elevator. 

The three of you separated into the two rooms and you changed into jeans,  a pink hoodie,  and sneakers. You then met the guys at the spa in time for your appointment. Sam and Dean were already in robes and slippers,  being entered into the hot tub room. After you checked in they entered you into a changing room with a private locker. You stripped into a robe and slippers then moved into the private hot tub waiting room. 

You dipped your feet into the not-too-hot tub and thought about today’s events. You had just agreed to join two male hunters in their private bunker. In any other context,  it would sound like your life was a true crime podcast. The fact you had a crush on Sam,  only made it worse. The night before,  you had counted on never seeing the Winchesters again to solve your feelings issue. That had no longer been the case since you agreed to stay with them. You either had to lose feelings or act on them. Despite what Dean had said,  the kiss last night,  you didn’t know for sure if Sam liked you. It was implied,  but uncertain. Your last relationship was your only one and you had only dated him because you didn’t want to reject him in front of his frat buddies. Curse your kind soul. 

Now that you actually had feelings for Sam,  you didn’t know how to act.  You looked to the roof and begged for a sign on what you do so that you could get this uncomfortable feeling out of the way.  

Just then a knock came on the door before a female spa assistant came in to assist you. "Your boyfriend requested for you to join him and his brother for the massage and facial,  is that okay?” You nearly chocked on your own spit at the use of the word “boyfriend” When referring to one of the Winchesters. Was that your sign?  Whatever, you thought to yourself,  you’ll take it as one.  You began to get out of the hot tub and follow the assistant into the dim lit room where Sam and Dean were face down already receiving their massage. You lay down,  place the towel over your bottom half,  and had the assistant help remove the robe. You turned your face to Sam,  "tell me why she called me your girlfriend?“ You laughed,  attempting to make a joke out of it. 

Sure,  you could have gone the rest of your life without mentioning it,  but with the sign,  you wanted to see his reaction. To confirm how he felt. He turned his face to you and half smiled.  He looked deep into your eyes,  his beautiful eyes were deeply searching your expression. He didn’t say anything at first,  which made you anxious at first. Did he think it was awkward?  Dean had headphones in that you could hear Metallica playing from across the room. It was an interesting choice of music for a relaxing massage. The point was,  he wouldn’t be able to hear a response and make fun of Sam,  so he had no excuse to worry about him. Other than Dean’s headphones and awkward sex-like grunts when the masseuse worked on him,  the room was pretty silent. 

You felt nervous and could hear your own heart racing as Sam stared into your eyes for what felt like an eternity. This kind of stuff only happens in the movies as far as you were aware. However,  as if his stares weren’t enough,  he answered your question with a soft but charming smile,  "is that so bad?”

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