#sorry my stupid giant puppy is my baby do you still think i’m hot

[44prop]

yosh pics anyone ?

[dreamescapeswriting]

Together ~ KNJ [Request]

WORD COUNT:5.3k

PAIRING: Namjoon x Reader

GENRE: College AU, friends to lovers, angst, fluffy ending,

A single cough erupted from one side of the giant lecture theatre that you were sitting inside of causing everyone to stare over at the kid that coughed. He blushed deeply but anyone would with around 100 students sitting and staring at you because you coughed. All of you were just sitting there waiting eagerly for the exam to end. Tapping pens could be heard as you glanced around at everyone, it was the final exam and it appeared as though everyone had already finished and was just waiting for the bell to ring. All you wanted to do was race out of the lecture hall and out into the hot summer weather to tan for a while but you had to sit there, in silence until the test was finished otherwise the whole year of learning would have been for nothing. 

All the hours of countless cramming for tests would have gone to waste so you sat there. Staring forward at the chalkboard and around 60 students heads since you were right at the back of the hall.

It was finally the end of your first college school year and you were looking forward to the next eight weeks of pure bliss, not having to worry about waking up early for lectures or staying up all night studying for a test. It was going to be the best summer vacation you could ever possibly want, you already had what you were going to do planned out. No one was going to be in the dorm house that you shared, they all had their own plans so you arranged to stay inside for the first week, catching up on everything that needed to do before deciding to relax, binge watch shows and do whatever you wanted.

"Pencils down and close your booklets, if you have no finished you're exam don't worry. I'm sure you can make it up when you repeat this year," You looked at the woman at the front of the room, she was a woman in her early 40's with a Karen haircut, she'd been brought in when your original tutor for the course left to have a baby and never bothered coming back. It was a surprise to you that you even knew half of the questions on the exam, the teacher was useless you practically taught yourself late at night reading through the books and countless research articles online. 

"Single file lines! You're adults, we shouldn't have to tell you how to behave!" She screamed as people began rushing to get out of the hall, you stayed behind not wanting to get trampled in the herd of people.

The room was silent again apart from the shuffling of papers as Mrs Kim collected all of the papers. Leaning behind yourself you began packing things into your bag not noticing that your best friend was lingering up behind you. 

"Boo!" He yelled out as he placed his hands on your shoulders and shook you a little making you cry out in surprise. 

"Joonie," You whined as you saw the surprised look on Mrs Kim's face as she heard a sudden noise come out of nowhere. 

"Sorry Mrs Kim, I've come to steal my best friend." He practically pulled you free from your chair and dragged you out of the hall and into the hallways where people were talking amongst one another.

"I'm not even going to ask how it went, you're my best friend and I already know you've passed," He said in a matter-a-fact tone as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and that was when you knew he wanted something. The two of you had been friends since you could walk and talk you knew exactly what he was up to when he was flattering you. 

"Whatever it is, no. I'm not doing it, I'm not driving you, I’m not doing a late assignment for you, I’m not going to pick you up late from a party and I'm not going to kill someone for you," You went through everything so you didn't leave a single thing out but Namjoon tutted at you. 

"I am offended that you would even think for a second that I was trying to get something out of you," You stood still as you looked at him with a blank stare, 

"Okay fine I need something," He grumbled pulling you with him as he walked out of the main campus building.

Back at the house, you waited for Namjoon to tell you what it was that he wanted, the whole walk home he'd been avoiding the question or distracting you with something else. The house you lived in was huge, it had around nine bedrooms in total all with their own bathrooms and two main bathrooms. It used to be an old mansion home but it was renovated when a college was built nearby and rented out to groups of college kids. The last year you'd been living there with Namjoon and six of his college buddies, all of you got along which was perfect, no awkward meetings in the hallways or kitchen.

"You can't just tell me you need something and then not say anything," You told him as you picked up a slice of pizza from the box and began eating it. This was what he did when he wanted something, he would try to bribe you with food or do something nice for you, you'd known him long enough that this meant he was going to ask for something big.

"You're not doing anything in the summer, right?" You put down the slice of pizza and brushed your hands onto a napkin as you got up to leave. You already knew what he was going to ask and you weren't interested, 

"No way, there is no way of me going on that stupid trip." You told him as you began heading for the staircase wanting to go to bed but he grabbed your wrist. 

"You're my best friend, we're supposed to look out for one another," He whined as he looked at you, his large brown eyes turning into puppy-dog eyes as he attempted to persuade you.

It was the summer vacation he and some of his friends had been planning to take together,

"Kyong is going and I don't want to be alone with her," He told you as he looked at you, tugging on your wrist as he waited for you to say something. Mi Kyong, his ex-girlfriend that practically ripped him apart and left you to stitch him back together again. Cheating on him so many times in the relationship you wondered how he stayed with her for as long as he did. To you, she was the devil in disguise but to Namjoon she was and would always be the love of his life. 

"I'm weak if I go near her I'll break," That wasn't a lie, you knew that if Namjoon even stayed in the same room as her alone she would somehow manipulate him back into her life only to break him up into pieces yet again.

"I thought Jungkook and the boys were going," You sighed thinking about how your perfect relaxing time was going to be ruined by going out to some log cabin in the woods.

"They're taking their dates...Please...We'll have fun I promise and you can bring books...Music, painting gear...Whatever you want," You knew he was never going to let it go so you nodded slowly at him, at least this way you could keep a close eye on him at all times. 

The two of you were back in the living room, pizza slice in your hand as you were ready to curl up and watch Grey's Anatomy together,

"There's just one thing," He called out, you turned to stare at him pizza slice in your mouth waiting for him to continue.

"You have to pretend to be my date." The pizza slice slipped from your hands and onto the white leather sofa as you stared at him. 

"What?" Your voice cracked thinking that maybe you'd heard him wrong or he was just trying to joke but he shook his head. 

"You have to pretend to date me, nothing major just...A cuddle and holding hands," You stared at him feeling your heart pounding against your chest at the thought of doing something like that was Namjoon. He wasn't the type of friend that cuddled or held hands with anyone so suddenly doing that bought back all of the feelings you had for him that you had repressed. You never wanted to admit your feelings for him and when you moved into a house together for college you pushed them down so deep you thought you'd gotten over him. 

"And share a room, which we've done before it's not a big deal." He mumbled as he began watching the screen. Not a big deal? To him maybe it wasn't a big deal but to you, it was bringing up all of the repressed feelings you'd hoped you had been over.

"Y-Yeah, no big deal." You mumbled staring at the screen as you suddenly didn't feel like eating anymore. 

"I gotta go pack," You said suddenly, leaving the pizza with Namjoon and rushing up to your bedroom. Slamming the door and looking around as you thought about all of the things you didn't have for a summer vacation, tomorrow was going to be an impromptu shopping trip as early as possible. 

The car pulled up outside the large home and you thought it was some kind of joke until everyone began pulling their bags out. You took Namjoon by the hand and stared at him, 

"I thought you said it was a cabin in the woods," You whispered turning to look at the large mansion behind you which was defiantly not a small cabin in the woods.

"No, I said it was a home in a remote area." The remote area part was right, the ride had taken you almost four hours to get out here and it was in the middle of the woods but it was not a home of any kind. It was huge and modern. All of it was an open plan area with large floor to ceiling windows. The walls were white and black and that was just the outside. 

"I couldn't let my boys slum it for the summer," Kyong's voice said as she trailed her hand along Namjoon's back, you watched as he tensed up. The original plan was for him to be in the car with her but you managed to get Jimin and his girlfriend to swap with you both, riding along with Yoongi and his girlfriend instead. 

"It's costing me almost 650,000,00₩, for the month. I know you're only here for a week but I decided I would stay." Everyone seemed to have their eyes glued onto the building as they stared at it, 

"Nine bedrooms so I'm afraid Y/n might have to be on the sofa," She said in a condescending tone but that was when Namjoon wrapped his arm around your waist and drew you closer to him. Sparks felt as though they were shooting off your body and you hoped no one picked up on the fact that you were so shy from the small touch. 

"Actually she'll be in my room since we're together." He stared at Kyong as he said it and the smile on her face was wiped away, leaving a shocked look as she tried to think of something to say in response. 

"Really? You and Y/n- Wow...I never would have thought your taste would have changed that much," You knew it was an insult but you chose to ignore her, pulling at Namjoon's hand. 

"Come on babe, let's go find a good view." You cooed, pulling him into the front door and hoping that Kyong would finally leave him alone now that she heard you were dating, that way you wouldn't have to go through the butterfly feelings every time he touched you, even a little. 

"Babe?" Namjoon chuckled as he walked behind you, he'd never heard you call him anything besides Namjoon or Joonie, or if he was in trouble, Kim Namjoon.

"You need it to be convincing, right?" A smirk played on his lips while you had your back to him, he let you lead him through the house to try and find a room for the two of you but it was huge and you thought you might have needed a map to find your way around. 

"Here," Namjoon laughed pulling you into a large bedroom, your bag dropped from your shoulder. 

The bedroom had its own sitting room so you weren't going to have to worry about sitting downstairs where Kyong would bother you. There were large glass windows leading out onto a balcony that looked as though it had grass on it.

"Why does the balcony have furniture, there's no door-" You stopped speaking when the glass doors that you originally thought were windows began to move and open up, folding into the walls so you could walk out onto the small balcony area that looked over a giant pool on the ground floor. 

"This place is incredible," You breathed out as you laid your hands on the balcony railing, looking over at the woods that were just beyond the house. 

Namjoon was looking around the room, an ensuite was connected to it all white marble. A walk-in shower and a corner bathtub with jets.

"Hey I-whoa," Namjoon stopped as he looked at you and the view wondering where the windows had gone.

"So that's what that switch did," He chuckled softly as he thought back on the switch he had flicked on the wall.

The night came sooner than expected, you'd spent most of the day unpacking everything you'd bought along with you and planning what you were going to do the next day and now everyone was gathered in the kitchen. 

"I made us all a pasta dish, I figured it would be nice for the evening," Not for one second did you believe that Kyong had cooked the pasta, mostly because there were take out containers in the bin but also because Namjoon told you about the last time she tried to cook. She almost burnt her entire dorm down just trying to use a rice cooker. 

"Are you really going to eat all that?" Kyong questioned as she watched you piling pasta onto your plate,

"I mean pasta is known to bloat us but I guess you're obviously not bothered about looking bloated." Namjoon was suddenly by your side ready to take over for you, 

"Y/n looks perfect, so why don't you just focus on yourself," He ordered, taking your plate and his over to tone of the many dining tables that were in the home. 

"Ignore her, she's just trying to get under your skin." He reassured you as he smiled weakly, you knew he still had feelings for her but it was nice to see how much he was stepping in for you when he needed to.

"What did you ever see in her?" You mumbled as you began eating some of the pasta, trying not to let her lingering words bother you so much. It wasn't as though you and Namjoon were really dating, it didn't matter what you looked like anyway. If a person didn't love you for who you really were then that person didn't deserve the time of day. 

"I'm not sure, I think I was looking in the wrong direction," He laughed as he watched you eating, smiling as he couldn't help but look at you. All the years he'd known you he had been hopelessly in love with you but never realised until it was too late. Until you both in college and busy with everything else to deal with one another, he never wanted to ruin the friendship that he had with you.

"What?" You questioned as you noticed how much he was staring at you, 

"Nothing...Did you bring my favourite book with you? I might sit by the pool with you tomorrow," He was trying to change the subject and distract his own mind from thinking about you in that way.

"Do you have spare blankets over there?" You asked Namjoon later when you were back in your room, 

"Yeah but I don't think you'll need them, it's summer." He chuckled looking up to see you standing over at the sofa in the bedroom getting ready for bed. You were dressed in one of his old football shirts from high school and a pair of shorts. Namjoon's mouth nearly fell open, he'd seen you in his clothes before but this was something different.

"I meant because I'm on the sofa, I can't sleep without something covering me," You laughed awkwardly when you felt how much he was beginning to stare at you, you shifted your weight from one foot to the other. 

"Why are you on the sofa? We have a huge bed right here," He laughed pointing at the large California King Bed that was in the room but you never would have thought that he would be okay with sharing with you. 

"You want to share a bed? You? Mr Kim Namjoon who hates being cuddled?" You laughed as you slowly made your way over to the bed, pulling back the covers a little. 

"Don't worry, it's not as if I'm going to cuddle you in the night." It wasn't something that worried you though, it was a thought that excited you.

The next morning Namjoon bought breakfast up to you on the balcony, telling you that he and the boys were going to go for a hike. 

"Sure, sounds good...Get some good photos," You told him as you bit into the apple he'd bought up to you, he smiled just watching you. That morning he'd woken up before you to find himself wrapped around you, one arm draped over your waist while your legs tangled together under the thin sheet you had both chosen to sleep in. 

"I will, what are you planning on doing today?" The plan was to sit in the bedroom and avoid Kyong as much as possible but you knew it wasn't going to happen, 

"I'll sit by the pool and read...Maybe go for a swim or bike into town." There was a small village just down the road, it was almost a two-hour walk but maybe an hour on the bike if you were lucky. 

"Sounds like a good idea, maybe I can ride with you later. We can get some snacks to bring back," Agreeing with him you couldn't wait for the day to pass just so you could spend some quality time with him but right now you were looking forward to curling up beside the pool. 

"Have a nice time," You whispered to Namjoon as you stood by the back gate of the house, all of the boys were getting ready to leave on their hike, the girls staying behind. 

"Wait!" You turned around to see Kyong rushing over in hiking boots, a coat and some short shorts that were going to do nothing to protect her from the bugs and nettles that could get her out there.

"You're going too?" You questioned as you looked from her to Namjoon, it was clear he had no idea it was going to happen. 

"Yeah. Me and my boys going for a long hike. It'll give me and Joonie a chance to chat." Hearing your nickname for Namjoon roll out of her mouth made your blood boil and you wanted nothing more than to trip her up but Namjoon looked at you and you instantly felt calmer. 

"Baby please come with me, it won't be the same without you." Frowning you stared at him wondering what he was doing when he pulled you close to him by your waist, leaning his face down so close to yours that you could feel his breath on your skin. 

"Fine, let me change..." You looked at him going to leave when Kyong scoffed at the pair of you, 

"Not even a kiss goodbye?" It was obvious that she didn't believe you and Namjoon were truly dating and you knew Namjoon wanted her to believe it so you grabbed him back the back of the neck and kissed him. The moment your lips touched it felt as though your legs had turned to jelly and you were about to fall but Namjoon held you steady, holding you by the waist as he pulled you closer to him enjoying the kiss between you. For that moment no one else was around you, it was just the two of you as you finally kissed for the first time, your heart hammering against your chest as if it was trying to escape. 

"I'll go and change," You whispered as you pulled away, your voice was hoarse as you stared at him biting down on your lip as you hoped that would happen again. 

"I'll wait here," His voice was almost as hoarse as yours as he watched you run back into the house, his eyes never leaving your body until you disappeared. 

"Well, that was a nice performance," Kyong mumbled but Namjoon didn't hear her, he just waited for you to return. 

The week was almost over and you were enjoying your time there more than you originally thought you were going to. You and Namjoon spent a lot of time with everyone else which meant pretending to be a couple most of the time, holding onto one another, kissing him whenever you had the chance. It started to feel as though you were pretending anymore and that this was really happening, even if you knew deep down inside that there was nothing to this. That it would all be over as soon as you got back to your dorms but for now you were going to soak up as much of his attention as you could get for yourself. 

"I don't like being blindfolded Joonie, it makes you think you're up to something," You whined as he continued to walk you through a bumpy area, you could hear gushing water and footsteps but that was all. He let out a deep laugh that seemed to echo around wherever you were and you whined again, 

"Relax, here-" He began to untie the make-shift blindfold and you let your eyes adjust for a second to see that you were somewhere you'd never seen before. It was a cavern that had a pool of water inside, flowers spreading over the walls of the cave, the walls and ceiling seemed to have silver reflecting on them because of the water. 

"Hot springs," He said with a smile, bending down to touch the water as it began bubbling, your mouth almost dropped open at the sight. 

"I didn't bring a bathing suit, you didn't tell me what we were doing," You laughed softly as you looked at him and then to the pool behind him, it looked as though it was going to be relaxing. 

"Is it deep?" He shook his head in answer to your question, 

"Probably reach your shoulders, there are some rocks just under the water we can sit on and relax." He promised as he began to unbutton the white shirt he was wearing, you gasped and turned away not wanting to make him uncomfortable. 

"I didn't bring a bathing suit. I'll wear my underwear, it's just the same," He said as he looked at you, hoping that you would do the same but not once saying what he wanted out loud. 

The two of you sat there side by side in the water just enjoying the peace and quiet, Kyong had done nothing but follow the two of you around all week long leading you to "pretend" you were both together for as long as possible.

"This week has been one of the most amazing times of my life," You told him as you rolled your head over to look at him, your gaze meeting his as he smiled at you. You didn't know if it was the low lighting or just because our feelings for him were resurfacing but his eyes seemed to sparkle, as though they had a golden hint to them.

"Even with all this pretending, that's been going on?" He questioned as he looked at you, biting down on his lip as you shrugged, 

"There's been one thing that's bugging me all week." He sat up straight making you do the same as you watched him, tilting your head to the side as you waited for him to elaborate on what he meant.

"I don't want to pretend...I want to be yours and I want you to be mine." Closing the distance between your mouths, you kissed him. At that moment it was clear that everything you had been feeling that week, the sparks, the butterflies, was all real. Everything you felt for him he felt the same for you and it excited you. He placed his hands on your waist lifting you up and placing him on his lap under the water as you continued to make out in the hot springs. 

His teeth biting down softly on your bottom lip as he asked for entrance, which you gladly granted him, letting your hands wander into his hair as you tugged him closer to you. 

"We're not pretending?" He questioned as you pulled away to catch your breath, you shook your head desperately, 

"Never again," You whispered before reconnecting our lips with his, going back to your steamy make-out session in the water.

Namjoon left soft kisses on your shoulder as the two of you laid naked in the bed, looking out at the night sky as you cuddled with one another. The two of you had made it back late after your make out in the hot springs and continued your session in the bedroom where it lead to more. 

"I'll go get us a snack," He chuckled as he heard your stomach growling, even if it was almost 3 am you were hungry from the activities you had both done together. 

"Thanks," You kissed him softly as he changed into a pair of shorts and a white shirt, disappearing out of the door and leaving you alone with your thoughts.

Letting out a small excited squeal you laid back against the pillows and smiled to yourself, you never thought this day would come and now it had, you couldn't contain yourself. Everything you had ever wanted was becoming a reality.

Time passed and Namjoon still wasn't back with your snack, you figured he was going to cook something so you laid there for a second, trying to rest a little before he came back not expecting to fall asleep within seconds of closing your eyes.

Waking up alone the next day you frowned to yourself, he was supposed to be beside you,

"Joonie?" You called out as you changed into some leggings and a baggy shirt thinking maybe he had gone for an early walk or something. You headed down to the kitchen shocked to see Kyong nursing a hangover but that wasn't the part that shocked you. The part that shocked you was that she was dressed in nothing but Namjoon's shirt, the one he had put on the night before to go and make a snack for you. 

"I made this, drink it." Namjoon's voice called out to Kyong as she smirked at you, turning her head to look over at him and that was when you saw the deep purple bite marks up and down her neck. At that moment it felt as though your whole world was falling apart as you put it all together, dressed in his shirt, he was looking after her and she was covered in marks.

"I-I can't believe it," The glass Namjoon was holding slipped from his hand and smashed against the floor, the green liquid splashing all over the white floors and cabinets while Kyong smirked. 

"Y/n, it isn't what it looks like." You scoffed at him, rushing back up the stairs towards the bedroom as you began throwing clothes into your bag, trying to get some money together as he begged you not to overthink it. 

"It's not what it looks like," He pleaded as he stood in the way of the door so you couldn't leave the bedroom, 

"Was she dressed in your shirt?" You questioned as you stared at him, his eyes widened with panic,

"Yes, but-"

"Was she covered in hickies?" You asked him again, cutting him off. All you needed were the answers you knew exactly what had happened. He fell back into her arms the way he always did, crawling back to her every time.

"Yeah, but that-"

"You didn't come back last night, were you or were you not with her?" His face fell and he didn't answer, tears rushed to your eyes as you pushed past him heading down the stairs and in the direction of the front door. 

"You can't just leave, we're miles away from home." He called out as he chased after you, Kyong holding onto his arm as she whined at him not to yell anymore. 

"That's my problem to deal with," You mumbled as you threw your bag over your shoulder and took one of the bikes, heading to town was the best plan for now. Once you were there you could figure out where to go by Kyong groaned at you, 

"They're for people staying on this holiday." Locking eyes with her you threw the bike onto the ground before heading down the long driveway, ready to start your long walk back into the town. 

"Y/n!!" Namjoon yelled as he chased you down the road, grabbing you by the hand as he made you look at him.

"You have to let me explain, I know how it looks." At this point your tears were already rushing down your face as you looked up at him, you thought that he would be the one person you could trust in the world. He knew how much it hurt to be cheated on and yet he still did it to you, was it even cheating? Were you nothing more than a fling for him? 

"What was it? I was just there until she decided she was jealous enough to take you back? Or were you both in on a joke about it, she knew I had a crush on you and thought she could get kicks out of it?" He didn't blame you for being angry but he held your arm as he tried to make sure you listened to him.

"You thought, I can't screw my ex so why not fuck my best friend over instead?" Namjoon's eyes watered as he stared down at you waiting for you to finish,

"How could you ever think I would hurt you like that?"

"Because you did-"

"No. I didn't. I went down to get you food last night and I found her, drunk and on the floor covered in her own vomit." You pulled a disgusted face as he explained what had happened, leading you over to a rock as he sat you down beside him. 

"She was covered in her own vomit, along with bite marks, hickies. She said she'd been into town for drinks and got a taxi back. I changed her into my shirt and took her to bed but she wouldn't go to sleep without me there," You looked at him, feeling bad for accusing him of doing the one thing you knew he hated her for doing to him. 

“I sat beside the bed the whole night, I didn’t get into bed with her, I just wanted to make sure she was okay.” He sighed and you realized how much you must have overreacted.

"Joonie..." You breathed out as you felt bad for everything, 

"I know what it looked like but I would never do that to you. I'm in love with you, always have been and always will be but I loved her too...She may have hurt me but she's still a person and someone I once cared for so I wanted to make sure she was okay," That you could understand, you knew how deeply Namjoon cared for everyone he met so you weren't going to hold that against him.

"Now, please...Come back so we can drive home together..." 

"Together?" You questioned as he locked your hands together, linking your fingers with his, 

"As a couple?" He questioned looking at you, making you smile brightly as you nodded your head. 

Tagline: @lyoongx  @mitzwinchester @rjsmochii @taestannie @sw33tnight @innersooya @sweeneyblue1 @jin-from-the-block @acciocriativity​ @mwitsmejk​ @anxiousbobatea​ @justbangtanthingz​

[nightshade-minho]

-Nightmare- (11)

Wc: 2.5k

“WHAT?”

“Y-yeah... she’s dating Juyeon.”

Minho ran his fingers through his hair, frowning as he leaned back against the couch.

“She fucking said she loved me...why would she do that?!” He said shakily, gritting his teeth.

Chan sighed, putting a hand on Minho’s arm.

“Look, shouldn’t you be glad that she’s finally moving on?”

“Why the fuck would I be glad?” He spat, glaring at Chan. He shrugged.

“I don’t know. You kept telling me you don’t deserve her. If you don’t want her, then at least let her be happy with someone else.”

“But...that’s the thing. I do want her. I want her so much it hurts.” He mumbled, peeling his eyes open and looking at Chan.

Chan stayed silent for a few minutes, sighing as he looked away. “Well then, why don’t you just tell her how you feel?”

“I’ve already told you. She does deserve better. I just...didn’t think she would move on so soon. And with him, no less.” He growled, rubbing his eyes. He couldn’t imagine you with Juyeon. It made him want to throw up.

“I think...I think I can accept that I’m not good enough for her. But, Chan?” He looked at the man, bottom lip quivering.

“I can’t live without her. I need her back in my life. She’s my best friend...it doesn’t matter if I can’t have her in the way I want to. I just want her back, even if all we’ll ever be is friends. It’ll be torture, but I’ll suppress my feelings if I have to. I’ve been doing it for all these years...”

Chan nodded, gripping his arm tighter. “Look bro, you’ll be fine. You and Y/n need closure. You two should talk.”

“I don’t think she wants to talk to me any more, though. I don’t know if she meant the things she said...but I can’t blame her. I was a dickhead too.”

“Hmm, right. Well, if you want your best friend back, just do something for her. Make her trust you again, and talk it out.”

“Right.” He nodded, putting a smile on. “I think...I think I can do that.”

“Good. I’ll be back. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.” He chuckled.

“No promises.” He chuckled, waving as Chan gave him a laugh, leaving.

He sighed, waiting for Chan to leave completely before he quickly pulled out his phone. He’d had enough. It was time for him to actually do something.

***

You drummed your fingers on the table as Juyeon turned around slightly, still stirring the pot of pasta on the stove. He gave you a wide smile.

You smiled at him, the expression on your face a stark contrast to the emotions rooted in you. “You really didn’t have to make lunch. I know how to cook, you know.”

“Yeah I know, but what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t do something special for you on our first day as a couple?”

You tried to hide your grimace as he turned around. God, he was so sweet. It made you feel bad about yourself. What a shitty person you were.

I’m not doing this to make Minho jealous, or to rub it in his face that I’ve moved on. 

You kept reminding yourself that. 

I’m only doing this because I don’t want to let Juyeon down.

Right?

You were snapped out of your thoughts as Juyeon put a plate down in front of you. “Dig in, baby.” 

You winced at the nickname. smiling awkwardly as you spooned some of the pasta into your mouth. Fuck, too hot.

Juyeon saw the expression on your face, eyes widening before he quickly stood up to grab a glass of cold water, handing it to you. “Drink.”

You nodded, taking the glass and gulping down the cool liquid as the man opposite you stroked your hair.

“You okay? I should have warned you about the heat...” He said sadly, sighing.

“N-no. It’s okay.” You sighed, blowing on the food before you took another bite, humming at the taste.

“It’s good.” 

His eyes lit up at that, and he grinned. “Really?!”

You let out a giggle at that. He’s like a giant puppy, you noticed. It was kind of cute.

“Really.” 

He smiled, hesitating a little before reaching over to grab your hand gently. You gulped, turning slightly pink. His hand was warm, and you liked the feeling of his fingers wrapped around yours. 

***

Minho opened the door, quelling the hatred in him as he gave Rina a half-hearted smile.

He stepped aside. “Come in.”

She frowned. “No, thanks. First off, tell me why you called me here. Cause...I’m not having sex with you. Just because Y/n finally realized your true worth and left you, and is now with someone better doesn’t mean I’m going to come crawling back to-”

“I didn’t call you here to have sex with you.”

“Oh.” She turned red, pausing. “Well then, why did you?”

“I need to...set some things straight. Apologize for the way I treated you. I lost someone I truly loved, and now that I think about it, it was wrong of me to accuse you. I have no one to blame but myself.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Um, okay. I already knew that, but it’s good to hear you admit it.” Her gaze softened just a little bit. “Do you really love her?”

“Yeah.” He said softly. “It scared me at first, but now...not so much.”

“Hmm.” She sighed. “It was still a fake relationship though, right? My suspicions were correct?”

He rolled his eyes. “More or less, yeah.” He shook his head as he realized how immature it all was. “Look that day...I didn’t mean to...” He sighed, rubbing his forehead, glancing up at her.

“You know what? Just come in.”

The girl hesitated before nodding, following him into the apartment as he sat on the couch. She paused before sitting down as well.

“Y/n told me I’m a fuckboy w-without any substance. And...she isn’t wrong. The past few years did change me.”

He groaned. “I’ve never liked being vulnerable...and she makes me exactly that. I really don’t have an excuse for any of this. Yes, maybe I do think with my dick most of the time....but I’ve always tried to be a good best friend to her. Lately though, I’ve been a complete asshole.” 

He looked up at her. “You’re...hot. And there’s nothing wrong with you. I didn’t run away that day because I didn’t want to have sex with you, I went cause I forgot that I’d made plans with her. I never meant to hurt you or humiliate you.”

She sighed, picking at the hem of her dress. “You’re not the only one that’s vulnerable. You and I are more alike than you realize.”

“Look, I should have told you where I was going, and the reason I was leaving. I shouldn’t have walked out like that. I’m just...sorry. I’ll do whatever you want me to do, to make up for it.”

She shook her head, “I don’t want anything, not anymore. My initial desire was just to see you hurt...and you are, now. So I guess I got what I wanted, but it doesn’t feel as good as I thought it would.”

Minho didn’t reply, still rubbing at his eyes. 

“I overreacted, so I’m sorry too.”

He peeled his eyes open. “You are?”

“Yeah.”

There was an awkward silence for a bit as Rina patted his knee hesitantly before getting up.

“I don’t think I should stay any longer. But...Minho?”

“Mm?”

“Maybe you should talk to Y/n. If I was in your place, that’s what I’d do.”

He stayed silent, eyes still closed. She sighed before leaving, the sound of the door closing making him open his eyes again slowly.

Everyone was telling him to talk to her, but it was easier said than done. The two of you had never fought before, not with this intensity. Hadn’t spewed such intense hatred at each other.

He punched his thigh, letting out a groan as he felt the pain rake through him. It felt satisfying. It was what he deserved for hurting you. You, who’d been nothing but kind and patient for as long as he’d known you. Breaking you was no easy task..and that’s exactly what he’d done.

How does one become a better person? He thought. It surely doesn’t happen overnight.

But...I could try. Even though I’d never come close to the type of guy she deserves.

For now, he decided he needed to get his best friend back. Baby steps. He stood up, grabbing his jacket and putting it on.

***

You sighed as you fiddled with your guitar, liking the weight of it on your lap. It felt comforting. 

Usually, around this time in the evening, Minho and you would be watching a movie on this very couch. He’d have his head on your lap...and would be making snide comments all throughout the movie, annoying the fuck out of you and making you want to kiss him (at least to shut him up) at the same time.

Minho wasn’t here at the moment.

The doorbell rang. You frowned, looking at the clock as you set your guitar aside. It had only been about an hour since Juyeon had left, promising that he’d return early tomorrow.

You slipped off the sofa, making your way to the door and opening it.

“I thought you said you’d-”

You trailed off, mind going blank as you saw Minho with his hands in his pockets, staring at you.

“Y/n.” He stuttered.

You stayed silent, your hands still shivering slightly. It’d barely been a day since you’d last seen him, but it felt more like a whole year. 

He ran a hand through his hair, worriedly taking in your expression and shifting from one foot to the other.

“Can I come in?”

He took your prolonged silence as a yes, slowly pushing past you and making his way to sit on the couch.

You turned around slowly, trying to get your brain to work. “W-why are you here?”

“To apologize.”

“To me?”

“Who else, dummy?”

You paused, shaking your head and sitting down on the chair opposite it. “Go ahead.” You said tightly. For some reason, you could no longer feel the sadness or anger in you anymore. You just felt...blank.

He breathed in deeply. “Where do I start...”

He looked up at you, taking in your face and sighing. The confession was bubbling on the tip of his tongue...yet he couldn’t force it out. 

He shifted closer to you, internally relieved when you didn’t move away. “Y/n...”

“Hmm?” You sighed, heart beating a little faster, unable to comprehend just why he was looking at you like that.

“I...I...” He felt his chest constrict, his mouth open, but with no words coming out.

He closed his eyes. Nope. He couldn’t do it. It was too hard. 

“I heard about you dating Juyeon, and...”

You looked up at him, awaiting his response. Your heart started beating even faster...would he be jealous? You felt like a shitty person for wanting him to be...you were with Juyeon cause you like him. You told yourself that again and again as you waited for Minho to speak.

“I’m really happy for you.”

“Wait, you...you are?”

“Yeah. You two would be good together. I think he’d treat you well. He has my best friend seal of approval!” He slowly grinned, trying his best to not show just how frustrated he was with himself for being unable to choke out his real feelings. The smile slowly faded as he saw your devastated countenance.

“Um, I mean...sorry for assuming. I’m still your best friend, yeah? I don’t think either of us meant anything we said that night...r-right?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow and taking a deep breath.

You sighed, lump in your throat. “Uh, yeah. Totally. I didn’t mean all the bad things I said...and also what I said after.”

“You d-didn’t?” Minho asked, his heart quivering.

“Uh huh. I don’t...love you. Not in that way.” You lied. 

“O-oh.”

“Yeah...I thought I did, but I don’t think what I felt was love. I should have never told you in the first place, especially when we were so angry at each other. I shouldn’t have blurted it out, knowing I wasn’t completely sure about my feelings and what they were. But...recent events have confirmed it. I’m not in love with you, Minho, so don’t worry.” You laughed nervously, feeling like your pants would burst into a blazing inferno if you went on for any longer. 

He gulped, nodding and staring at his lap. “Ah. That’s...good to hear.”

“Yup.” You bit your lip, blinking back tears.

There was an awkward silence for a few minutes before Minho turned to you again, holding his hand out. “Let’s move past this, shall we? Friends?”

You hesitated before taking his hand. “Yeah. Best friends.” You added.

He nodded, letting himself give you a weak smile. He’d come here to make up with you, and repair your friendship. But why did it feel like nothing was resolved? He felt empty. You didn’t have any feelings for him...and he couldn’t blame you. It was inevitable. He hated himself, and couldn’t imagine why someone as wonderful as you would ever fall in love someone like him. So...that definitely cleared things up. He was lucky enough to have you as his best friend.

You gazed down at your intertwined hands, unable to hold back the tears any more. Minho felt his heart break as he saw you cry. 

“Hey...don’t cry.” He said softly. He moved closer, hesitating before slowly pulling you into him, his arms wrapped around your waist. You cried into his chest, wetting his shirt as you let out your emotions, the very person who was holding you in his arms being the reason behind all of it. 

He pulled you away from his chest slowly, putting his finger under your chin and tipping it up, observing your face with tears of his own pooling in his eyes. 

“It’ll be okay.” He wiped your tears, his breath hitching as he felt his fingers brush across your soft cheeks. He cupped your cheek, gulping as he felt your heavy gaze on him.

The two of you were so close, and yet so far away...

Not being able to take the eye contact anymore, you buried your face back in his shirt, closing your eyes and letting him pull you into him further, engulfing you with his warmth and stroking your back. He rocked you back and forth slightly, your eyes closing, heady drowsiness settling itself in you as he continued the soothing action. He felt you fall asleep, sighing as he stretched his arm to grab the blanket thrown over the side of the sofa, wrapping it around your body and adjusting you against him in a more comfortable position. 

You mumbled sleepily, rubbing your cheek against his chest. He ruffled your hair fondly, smiling sadly as you slipped further into slumber.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered.

[1zashreena1]

Angst Fluff Whiplash -14

18+, m/f, technically OCxDiego Jimenez [Power]

Summary:  What does an apex predator do after confessing undying love? Princess is about to find out.

WARNINGS: Ridiculous descriptions and ‘the code is more like guidelines’ outlook on grammar. Is it OOC if the character was given essentially zero development in canon???

Non-descriptive sexytimes, the L word, criminal activities glossed over, relationship building, plus size woman+fit man, Anxiety, This one is all feels and

I Am So NOT Sorry. 

THE TIME HAS COME

A/N:  Princess took on a life of her own and has essentially become an OC. There are infrequent mentions of her description (specifically as plus size) and her actual name in later pieces (its Bicki). She started as self-insert so she looks like me (plus size, white, short, blue eyes, curly hair). If that is not your thing, I totally understand. And do not feel obligated to read this, I will not be offended!

I’m not a fan of “plot” so be aware that most of this series is just meandering through their relationship, angst-fluff-smut whiplash style. But with dick jokes.

TAGLIST: @chelsfic​ ​ @symbiont13​ ​ @nicke0115​ ​​ @bunnykjm​ ​ @rosee-sensuelle​ ​ @girlpornparadise​ ​ @mandoplease​ ​ @heresathreebee​ ​ @xxsteph-enrixx​ ​ @jetiikad​ ​ @joalsglasses​ ​ @mutantcookiesecrets​ ​ @demoncatstone​ ​ @squidlywiddly87​ ​ @lockedoutofmyotherblog​ ​ @poeedamerons​ ​

"I don't know, Lisa. He won't tell me. Not until this weekend apparently?  We're supposed to go shopping."

"Honestly, I'm scared. I mean, there's the whole how did he get a passport FOR me dilemma. Then the part where he knows I don't like surprises. And he said he was calling my sister!"

"Oh my God, she could tell him anything! Please don't tell him about the Backstreet Boys phase. I'm going to have a panic attack."

"Of course he would tease me about it for eternity!"

"What? Watch what words? What are you talking about?"

"Do not hang up this phone! Do you even love me?!? Lisa? …. Hello?"

You toss your phone down on the bed and heave a huge sigh. Your very own BFF, abandoning you like that. Luckily its your own phone and not the insane cell Diego got you because it bounces off the other side of the bed and smacks into the wall before admitting total defeat to gravity. 

You stand there staring at your open suitcase. Your typical items are in there already. You don't need any toiletries. Or makeup, now. Or bras. Or underwear. Fucking hell, its like I already moved into the penthouse with him. 

… Could I do that? He already basically asked for it. He keeps telling me to quit my job and let him spoil me for real. You wring your hands together while rubbing your lips against each other and being bombarded with intrusive thoughts. Yeah. Until he's done with me and then I have to start all over. At 35. 

But its been almost a year now that you've been seeing Diego. What does that even mean, "seeing" him? You think about how the last few months have been so… easy. He practically lives in New York now, their territory split. He opted to control the East Coast and let his sister deal with the logistical nightmare of receiving the imports. 

He has been a lot looser since then. Faster to laugh, quicker to goof around, less likely to do anything as hard as he used to do. The distance from Alicia has allowed him to really flourish in every aspect. And he's beautiful with it. The laugh lines and the soft brown eyes wreck you every time.

He says he wants to keep you. Take care of you. You finally believe that he loves you. He has made so many improvements in communication. Hell, he read books on how to be with someone on the spectrum. Do you understand it? Hell no. Are you going to take it and run? Fuck yeah dude. I love him and I want to keep him.

And now he wants to take you on a trip. A surprise destination. Out of the country with a mostly legal passport. You don't doubt that you'll be safe with him. Your parents were a little concerned when you told them since they've never even met him. And they saw him on the national news that time he got arrested by the Feds, so that really inspires confidence. 

Your middle sister Lynne and niece Halley accidentally met him that one afternoon about a month back. And they have not shut up about it since. Diego this, Diego that, blah blah blah, paid the restaurant bill in cash, yadda yadda, took us all shopping to a Coach store and then got Halley some crazy new sold out Nikes. Diego had been delighted to be surrounded by a gaggle of giggling girls enjoying his spoiling attentions. Just like always, Diego went to the max and charmed them silly.

It was like having an out of body experience to see Diego with them. You couldn't really fault them, he swept you off your feet with no problems.  He was grinning and joking the whole time, making raunchy comments with your sister and encouraging your niece to be assertive (unnecessary according to her soccer coach and the 'Most Aggressive' trophy). He fit right in with them. Afterwards he had asked if that was what it was like to have normal siblings and your heart broke thinking about what his childhood had been like with his sister. 

Which brought you back to the here and now. He had mentioned off hand that he was going to call your sister. Maybe you should text her. She might know something.

Maybe you should just pack your bag and trust him. 

Your Diego Cell chirps and you dive for it on the nightstand. Is he okay? Please don't be hurt.

Its a pic of him. In the shower. With his own hand wrapped around himself. You choke on air and have to sit down. 

I miss you Princess

Holy. Shit. Its been almost a year that you have had unrestricted access to that incredible body and your reaction is still the same. Before you can respond another text arrives:

SOON

The attached pic is just from squinty eyes up.

You burst out laughing at him. You love that he is secretly a nerd about internet stuff. His appearance would never give that away. Time to be ridiculous right back.

Don't make me lick your eyeball 

You are a crazy person laughing to yourself alone in your bedroom.

You are so weird

Yet there you are, lusting after this weirdo

You shoot back.

… Am I the weirdo??

No. Still you.

I would threaten to bite it.. but you would like that

Well now you have to

Oh my God. You're fairly certain you could do anything to this man and he would think it was sexy. Its a novel experience.

Can we eat dinner at home tomorrow? I don't feel like wearing a real bra

You know the answer to that. 

YES. NO MORE BRAS EVER AGAIN. BE FREE

… no panties?🙏🥺

You can see the hopeful puppy dog eyes clearly.

A for effort babe. One of these days you might get your wish lol

...Are you panty free right now?

Wow. He is really trying here.

I'm packing. 

Your pic is a heap of tangled thongs dumped on top of Tiny Murder Panther.

💜🔥😛

He would find that hot. Fucking nympho.

Lemme finish this so I can go straight to the airport tomorrow

Fine. But I am pouting 

You do not doubt that.

Don't care. Still love your stupid face

You cannot believe you just sent that. 

Princess. 

Mi amor.

Diego's good little girl.

You shudder with the praise. You can hear it in his voice, as if he were right here with you.

I love you

Dream of me?

Oh baby, if you only knew. You sigh wistfully.

Always, baby

---------------‐---------

The flight is uneventful, thankfully. Your maxidress with a built-in shelf bra is stupidly comfortable and you actually take a nap. 

The plane has barely come to a stop and you already have on your silly lambswool lined Ugg flip flops. You had argued with Diego about these (Why would flip flops need a warm fuzzy lining??) but he had won by sticking one in your face and ordering you to feel. It didn't take a full second for you to snatch them both from him and cuddle them to your chest. His pleased smile full of dimples was worth all the subsequent teasing.

You slip on one of his previously stolen shirts in a metallic lilac color and roll up the sleeves so you have use of your hands. Bending at the waist, you flip your hair over and fluff it back up from the nap. What was that he had said? Oh yes: Wild and thick, just how I like it. The memory makes you bite your bottom lip and smile.

Bastian is waiting for you on the tarmac. He takes your bag and kisses you on the cheek in greeting. "Hey, sweetie. Nice shirt, is that new?"  His knowing grin is infectious. 

You nuzzle into the collar with a laugh. "Thanks! My boyfriend gave it to me." 

Bastian chuckles as he opens the passenger door for you. "Oh, honey. That is not all he is going to give you." He closes the door while you roll your eyes smirkingly. 

The ride to the penthouse is uneventful. Well, as uneventful as Friday evening rush hour traffic can be in New York. 

Bastian waits until the song is over before lowering the stereo volume. "We're supposed to pick up dinner. Any requests?" He drums his fingers on the steering wheel while you sit at the red light.

You ponder the options. "What kind of a day has he had? Meetings? Tours? Disciplinary action?" You ask Bastian thoughtfully. Sometimes when Diego has a bad day he likes comfort food. Mostly a giant heap of rice and beans next to homemade tortillas, he isn't so picky about the variety of meat.

Bastian glances at you out of the corner of his eye before warily answering, "There was a… termination… at a construction site this afternoon that took longer than expected. That's why he didn't come to get you, he wanted to shower first."

You keep your eyes focused forward to look out of the windshield. "Okay. How about Jalisco's then?" Comfort food it is. 

Bastian nods and adjusts course to obtain those tortillas.

‐--------------------

The instant the elevator doors ding open Diego pops up from the sectional and comes straight at you. Your giant sidestep to let Bastian pass is barely completed before Diego is slipping those big hands under his own pilfered shirt to crush your body to him. Your arms go around his neck like a reflex, like this is their natural resting place. He leans his forehead down onto yours and kisses you so very gently.

"Mmmm. Hi." You murmur softly into his beard. Those bottomless brown eyes look over your entire face before coming back to your own. His smile is huge, those dimples make your pulse trip. He blinks slowly down at you, just like the big cat you nicknamed him after. 

"Princess. How was the trip?" He always asks you this. You still aren't sure if its just culturally specific manners or if he is requesting a review of the flight crew's performance. Either way, your answer is always the same.

You pull him back down so you can cuddle into his neck. "Its better now that I'm here." He rubs his cheek against your own and purrs directly into your ear in response. Your body's reaction is immediate and decisive. You shiver in his arms and your nipples peak to full attention.

Except this time is different. With only a bralette and the dress's shelf bra Diego can clearly feel what just happened in real time. His eyes are comically round as he peers down at your cleavage in pleasant wonder.

"Oh. I like this outfit." His hands rise up your back to crush you further into him. You chuckle and rub your chest on his firm pectoral muscles. He watches hungrily as your compressed decolletage rises higher yet from the added pressure. "New rule to match the bedroom pants bar, no bras in the penthouse. Fucking magnificent, bonita." He licks his lips after making this proclamation.

You throw your head back and laugh joyfully.

‐----------------------

As it always does the weekend passes too quickly. Its already 1:00pm on Saturday when you two finally come down from the bedroom.

Diego is delighted to hear that your time-off request was approved for the trip. You had told him not to worry about it, your boss always kept her word about this stuff. 

That’s when he pulls a ridiculous pith hat out from under the couch. It looks like it came straight out of a Looney Tunes cartoon about a big game hunt on the African savannah.  You lose your entire shit and laugh until you do that silent clapping seal move.

Diego keeps repeating, "Wait, stop laughing. Stooooop." But he isn't faring much better. You finally wipe the tears and calm down enough to take it from his limp fingers while he chortles a few last times.

"Baby. What. What the fuck. What fucking is this??" You plunk the hat on your own head and Diego collapses facedown into your lap to gigglesnort uproariously. "Stop. Stop laughing. Stoppit!" You smack the back of his head lightly until he comes up for air.

He closes his eyes and composes himself. You take the opportunity to plop the hat on his head.

"Oh my god, that is so sexy!" You declare in high dramatics. 

He grabs your hands and leans in very close to explain. "You need this hat for our trip." Your eyes narrow in suspicion. "You will wear it for our safari quest…" he pauses for dramatic effect and your lips twitch in suppressed amusement. He leans closer yet and captures your stare. His face is hilarious, you can tell he is biting his cheek to keep from laughing. His eyebrows are drawn down in concentration but his eyes are widened in mock excitement. He sucks in a deep breath to exclaim, "To locate palm trees in the wild!"

He laughs as he puts the hat back on you.

You blink a few times in shock. Palm trees? You're going somewhere with palm trees? A tropical locale. Palm trees. Beaches. SWIMSUITS. Your sudden panic must show on your face because Diego's laughter dies off.

You blink furiously, but its too little too late. The tears burn as they well up in your eyes and spill down over your cheeks.

He reaches out to cup your face. "Princess?" His tone is an even mix of concern and fear. "Bicki? What?"

You shake your head 'no' and throw yourself into him. Diego catches you and hauls you into his lap. You curl up against his chest and sob quietly. He pets over your hair, open handed strokes so his fingers don't tangle in the curls, and soothes your back while you shake. Rubbing his nose against your temple, he kisses your cheek and whispers, "Do you want to write?" His gentle care only makes you worse. "...so that is no." He looks crestfallen. He buries his face in your hair and breathes heavily.

Your tears are slowing and your chest is finally beginning to loosen. "Dieg-" you hiccup, wrapping both hands around his forearm. You wheeze a few times before trying again. "I. I. Where? Where are we g-going?" 

He sighs deeply before answering. "Nowhere. I won't take you somewhere you don't want to go. I should have known better. I-" He snaps his jaw shut so fast that his teeth click together. 

Tilting your head back, you try to catch his eyes. Diego won't look at you. "H-hey, please." You cup his jaw and pull him down to you. He comes, but the motions are stilted. "Look. Please, baby. Let me s-see you."

When he finally meets your eyes it breaks your heart. That chocolate gaze is disappointed, hurt, frustrated even. You wiggle around until you're straddling his lap. He just holds his hands out of the way, not hindering you but certainly not helping either. Standing up on your knees to lean your forehead against his, you reach for his hands and bring them to your chest where you lace your fingers together. 

"Baby. I want that." Your nose rubs against his as you speak. "I want to go everywhere with you. I never thought I would ever get a chance like this. To travel? To go somewhere tropical? To have someone who loves me enough to do this for me?" You're crying again. And so is Diego? A little?? 

He brings your joined hands up to tap your chin. His face is adorably conflicted when he speaks, "You… want to go?" You nod slowly. His eyebrows lower as he tries to make sense of this. "Then why do you cry? Are they, the uh, is that 'happy tears' ?"

Your hands shake in his. "Yeah. Happy tears. I just. I was overwhelmed. I'm sorry." He huffs out a sigh. You continue, "Its almost like the super intense emotions short circuit my responses and I guess my default is panic crying? I don't know."

Diego huffs at you again. "Please stop that. I'm going to have a heart attack." There is a hint of real annoyance in his voice but his lips curl up at the corners. 

You free your right hand to reach up and brush his wet lashes. Why did something this little bring him to tears? "Baby, is everything okay?"

He leans into your hand, then turns to kiss your fingers. You giggle, you can't help it, his beard both tickles and delights you. He smirks at you, "It is now, Princess. You should get dressed so we can go." 

But you're not done here yet. "Where are we going on the trip? A place name, not foliage that may or may not be present."

His Cheshire cat grin is intriguing and mildly worrisome. He gives you one word, "Xcalak." And then watches while you access your mental map and pinpoint the exact location. 

It takes you a moment but you find it with a gasp. "Costa Maya? Like Caribbean-sea side of Mexico??"  He nods and you immediately start in with 20 Questions. "Are there cenotes? Is the water really those unreal colors? Is the food amazing there? Can we see ruins?"

Diego cups your face to stop you. "Whatever you like, little girl." With a kiss to your nose and a smack to your ass he ushers you upstairs to get dressed. 

-----------------------

The shopping is less traumatic than normal for you thanks to Diego making enthusiastic innuendo nonstop and feeding you between stores. You find sandals, and flip flops, and little slip-on sneakers. All kinds of flowy maxidresses and flouncy skirts paired with new tank tops in buttery soft fabrics. Cover-ups and kimonos and huge airy loose knit sweaters get rung up with linen pants and shorts you actually feel comfortable wearing.

But swimsuits? A disaster. Everything that fits your hips is way too big for your ribcage. Tankinis big enough to go around your middle are about a foot too wide around your chest. You try some maternity stuff… amazingly there isn't any chest support. That confuses both of you for almost 20 minutes while you discuss it over croissants and various iced beverages (coffee for him and some kind of hot chocolate slushie for you).

Then you look across the street and inspiration hits. One of the stores you order bras from is right there and has bra-sized swimwear in the display window. Diego turns to see what stole your undivided attention from him and slaps his hand down on the table in celebration. 

You aren't sure which one of you is more excited to get into the store. But while you run around exclaiming at all the things that come in your size Diego stands in the doorway and gawks. When you circle back to check on him he just points to one display wall.

There is lacy, frilly, corseted lingerie. In. Your. Size.

He demands one of everything that fits you and isn't red, brown, or yellow. You don't even argue.

The store does alterations and makes very good recommendations. The sales clerk is impressed with Diego's input, she comments that he really does seem to know your body well. You flush with it, glad that he isn't close enough to hear that. You leave with three bags and seven personalized swim outfits under construction. One is ready to wear and you keep reaching into the bag to touch it in wonder. 

Diego notices but just gives you a raised eyebrow. 

"This is the first time I've ever felt good about how I look in swimwear." You confess quietly. 

Diego wraps a massive arm around your shoulders and tucks you into his side while you continue down the sidewalk. 

--------------------

Sunday is a mess as you try to make pancakes and Diego tries to remain physically attached to you like an excessively attractive barnacle. The pancakes are either burnt or still batter in the middle. Leftover carnitas and tortillas to the rescue. Diego teases you about the kitchen failure all day because this is the first time he has witnessed such a thing.

You doze on the couch under the pretense of "reading". Diego rotates through his laptop, cell, and the soccer match on ESPN+. 

Until his phone rings. 

You both tense up. Only one person calls him instead of texting. He takes the phone into the office to answer his sister. You wait on the couch to see which Diego you get back: silly tickle fight Diego,  sad puppy dog eyes Diego that requires cuddles, or  angry Diego that needs to fuck you through the nearest horizontal surface. 

The elevator dings and Julio comes in with a tray of coffees. "Ay, Gordita. Buenas tardes. I got you the hibiscus thing you like." He greets you with a big smile, then looks around when he doesn't see Diego on the sectional with you.

Hopping up to help him carry stuff, you point to the office in indication of Diego's location. Julio makes a face, "Hermana perra?" and you simply nod. Julio takes Diego's iced coffee and bites the bullet for you. The door closes softly behind him.

You munch plantain chips and slurp hibiscus lemonade until they come out.  Diego just looks tired when he comes back to you on the couch, coffee in hand. You open your arms in invitation and he plops next to you with a sigh. Cuddly Diego it is.

He doesn't tell you anything and you don't ask. Everyone watches the match mindlessly. Diego snores softly in your lap while you pet his hair.

He rides to the airport with you but you forbid him from coming onto the plane with you. He is already making this harder than it has to be with his big brown eyes and clingy hands.

"Baby." You breathe into his hair while he snuggles into your neck in the backseat of the SUV. "Its only a week. We do this every week." You pet down his bicep and immediately regret it.

"I know." Diego huffs into your skin. "Why don't you just quit? Let me take care of everything." You go through this almost every week now, too. He nuzzles you, the sensation makes you reconsider his proposal. You pull his head up by a fistful of soft hair and look him in the eye. He blinks guilelessly at you.

"Number one: No. Number two: Stoppit." He laughs at your fond exasperation. "Okay. I'm gonna go. You stay on the ground."

"Fine." He whines. "But I am going to send you a dick pic the moment that plane takes off." He crosses his arms as if daring you to tell him no.

You cup his stupidly attractive face in your hands for a kiss. Okay, several kisses and 27 minutes later, you respond, "Send me one every day. Its my favorite dick." His startled laugh makes you feel very pleased with yourself.

He pulls you into his arms again to kiss you one last time. His beard scratches and you sigh into him. Finally that tongue retreats and he rests his forehead on yours. His voice is low and rough, his hands squeeze tight on your hip and thigh, "I love you, Princess."

Will that ever stop hurting? You close your eyes against the burn of tears but smile with happiness. "I love you, Diego." You pop the door handle before you open your eyes to see him watching you, jaw tense. You stick your tongue out and he breaks into a smirk. With a laugh, you slide out of SUV and walk to the plane, determined not to look back.

When you get up the stairs the pilot greets you, but his gaze shifts behind you. Turning around, you see Diego standing outside the SUV, arms crossed and trying to look so not soft. You smile and mouth Bye baby, he gives you a short little wave. You duck into the plane before you can start crying.

The wheels are not, in fact, off the ground when the phone chirps.

‐-----------------------

The trip is a few weeks out and there is some kind of emergency at the San Diego docks the next weekend. So. You don't get your Murder Panther fix. 

And your coworkers notice. They spend all day Monday strolling past your cubicle, straining their necks to see if you're wearing new shoes or some fresh bling. Finally someone has the nerve to ask how your weekend was. 

You find yourself blinking back tears. I miss him so much. This is ridiculous, he just texted you at like six this morning. But its not just the conversation you miss, now is it? You miss that big body crowding you into the corner of the couch. His soft curls under your hands. That beard on literally any inch of your skin. Draping yourself over shoulders wider than your hips and knowing that not only can he take your weight, he likes it.

He says he wants to keep you and you desperately want to keep him. Why do you fear this? Is it just his profession? The risk? Oh god, how do you even go about introducing him to your parents??? Diego can be all kinds of charming but he can be a real asshole, too.

And they know what he is: A criminal.  For your boomer parents he is the living embodiment of Public Enemy Number One. 

Grand Theft. 

Money Laundering.

Arson.

Murder.

International Cocaine Trafficking. 

HE IS A LITERAL DRUG LORD.

You lay your head down on your desk and try to keep it together. 

Your Diego Cell chirps.

Your laughter bubbles up until it comes out of you without your consent. It turns hysterical and you realize you need to leave the office suite. Now. 

In the bathroom you stare down at the phone as it lights up again with another message.

Miss my Princess💔👑

How? How is someone who can do all those illegal things so nauseatingly sweet to me?

And then it hits you. Illegal. You didn't use the word immoral. Illegal. You think back to how everyone you see working directly for him is well into adulthood. No children. There are a few women but they are not being sold by him, they are there by their own free will. And he has never laid a hand on any of them, they're just as comfortable around him as the men are. No sex trafficking.  You saw someone give their resignation last month. The dude walked away with a suitcase of cash for a decade of trustworthy service. Its a better retirement plan than what I have. 

Have you seen him assault people? Yes. You've seen him stab people. Carve off someone's ear because they weren't listening as assigned and it cost the Jimenez Cartel a shipment. You've seen him push an informant down an empty elevator shaft. Choke a man into unconsciousness with his bare hands when you were disrespected. 

And you still love him. Not a single one of those incidents weighs on your conscience. Your morality is a dingy grey 12 year old men's undershirt that you should just throw away but you're definitely going to cut into rags to keep for cleaning when it comes to Diego. 

The cell lights up again.

Mi amor 💞😍🍑🏝✈⏲👙

You don't know what's worse: His excessive and ridiculous usage of emojis or the fact that you understood. 

Look what came

The attached pic is a few pieces of your new swimwear. They look gorgeous, you can't even tell where the alterations were done.

You have to try on all of them. And show me

Of course he wants his own personal show. You feel desire burning low in your belly. Its been a year and not once has he ever shied away from your stomach rolls or hinted at weight loss. He never questions the food you order. And while the two of you have chuckled about shapewear he has never mocked you for using it. Or seemed disappointed when you opted not to wear it. He tosses you around like its nothing and prefers for you to sleep on top of him. Its not that he loves you despite your weight, he loves it as part of you.

-------------------------

Its now Thursday and the desk drawer where you keep your purse at work is vibrating. He knows I'm at work. If he calls right back I'll answer him. You try to keep your Diego Cell out of sight at work or you'll never get anything done. Plus your coworkers are always dying to catch a peek of your infamous sugar daddy/boyfriend.

Yeah. Boyfriend. Keep practicing that. It feels good. 

You finish the insurance call and hang up your headset when the vibrating starts again. Your next door cubicle neighbor pops around the divider to advise you to answer that before he comes down here and abducts you.

What deity should I pray to for that??

You snatch Diego Cell and march out to the hall. Poking the green button, you answer the call.

"Baby. You okay?"

"Princess! I… yeah. I'm not hurt."

He sounds odd. There is definitely something going on here.

"What's up? You need me?"

The silence stretches. 

"Yes. Please?"

Diego sounds very uncomfortable. It causes you physical pain.

"Well, you have me. What is it?"

You can hear him swallow and in your mind you picture him looking away, hiding some soft emotion shining in his eyes.

"Baby?"

"Here. I am here. I just. I just wanted to hear you."

Something is very wrong with my Murder Panther, you think.

"Babe," your voice is soft, you're trying to ease him. "Can you tell me what's wrong?"

He huffs and you can hear him scrape a hand down over his face. "I know you are at work. And I should not have called. But."

His voice trembles, even over the phone you can hear it. He's afraid.

"Diego. If you need me, then you have me. Tell me, baby." You try to be reassuring but you also really need to know what is wrong.

"I would like to come down there." His declaration is overly formal. You wonder who he is trying to impress. Its certainly not me.

"You… want to come down here instead of me going up there this weekend?"  You're trying to make sense out of any part of this conversation. 

"I…. grrrrrrrrr."  He growls in frustration. Between English being his second language and your sensory processing issues, this is not an uncommon occurrence. He sucks in a deep breath and charges forward in an emotional rush. "I know you're working, but I want to come down there because I miss seeing your face." Before you have a chance to answer he adds, "Pick me up? At the airport, after work? Please, Bicki." His voice cracks at the end and his inhalation is ragged. Your heart implodes. 

"Diego. Baby. Of course. Of course I will. I can be there by six." You have a mental flash of how dirty your bathroom is, all the clothes you have laying around, and the vacuum you haven't touched in over a month. Diego needing me is more important.

"Good. Good. Yes, I. I will text you. When I land." His voice is raspier than ever, low and gravelly. 

"Sure. I'll be there." I'll always be there.

"Okay. You… you should go." You can hear his determination. You can visualize him squaring his shoulders and setting his jaw, taking on the Jimenez Cartel persona. 

"Hey." He grunts in acknowledgement. "I love you." You blurt it out before you have a chance to talk yourself round in circles. You can hear voices in the background. 

"And you. You as well." The call ends, but you know.

---------------

You're sitting in your car at the little regional airport second guessing the coffee you got when the phone chirps. 

Here

Springing out of the car, you wave to the security guard as you trot past. "Hey Jim, I just have to grab someone real quick. That's okay, right?" You wave vaguely back toward your car parked in the fire lane. There are only four security guards who work here and they all know you at this point. 

Jim laughs but waves you on. "Go get 'im, sweetie." Jim must be pushing 90 by now, he doesn't care about traffic laws.

You enter one of the two sets of automatic doors on this entire building and cross through the tiny lobby. There. You can see his dark hair and ridiculous shoulders over a completely unnecessary row of potted plants. He must hear your echoing footsteps because his head whips around in alarm, but his face relaxes into a wide smile. He lengthens his strides to come around the stupid plants, hands automatically reaching out for you.

"Diego." You laugh breathily and fling arms around his neck. He smells so good. 

He crushes you to his chest and buries his face in your neck. "Printhesss." He murmurs into you, slurred because he refuses to remove his mouth from your skin. 

Turning your head to kiss his cheek, you moan shamelessly for him. He surges back upward to capture your lips and kiss you with mild desperation. That devious tongue sweeps over the roof of your mouth before curling up behind your top front teeth. 

Your entire world narrows down to Diego. Chocolate. Tastes like the smoothest Belgian chocolate in existence. He smells perfect, clean but definitively male to you. His silky button-down is smooth under your hands, stretched taut over muscle. Those massive hands gather you closer, molding you to that big, solid body. His beard scratches your face in soft tickles when he alters the angle of the kiss just so.

"Goddamn." A woman's voice exclaiming somewhere behind you catapults you back into the here and now. Which is a dinky little regional airport in rural central Pennsylvania. You know, a very public location in a very prudish area of the country. Fuck.

You pull back and Diego's hands shoot up to the back of your head. Holding you in place, he leans his forehead against yours with a contented sigh. He rumbles softly to you, "Take me home."

You feel so silly seeing Diego in the passenger seat of your Corolla, he just seems so out of place. "You can adjust the seat however, nobody really sits there. I just put it all the way back to make sure you can get in without cracking your head." You sound nervous even to your own ears.

Diego turns to you with a response but his attention is captured by the cup holders in the center console, specifically the Dunkin Donuts styrofoam cup. He points to it, then looks up at you with a slow grin. "Princess. Is this for me?"

You flush but can't stop the embarrassed little smile so you cover it with sass, "Well, it sure as hell ain't for me." You start the car and give Jim a little wave. He winks and gives you two thumbs up. Yeah, I'm aware that you saw that kiss too, old man. Everyone saw that shit.

When Diego reaches for the coffee his fingers brush your hip. The contact burns and you suddenly remember that you have not touched this beautiful man for well over two weeks. Apparently he remembers, too, because he wraps that huge hand around your thigh with rather a lot of force. Right hand slapping down to cover his, your heart rate jumps through the roof. Did I take my blood pressure pill this morning?

"Don't." You choke out.

He rumbles softly next to you, purring with conceited pleasure. "Did my Princess miss Diego?" He asks you with an incredibly pornographic voice. 

"Oh, fuck you." Your answering groan is also obscene. So glad the windows are up.

His hoarse chuckle makes your thighs tremble. "You're Diego's good little girl, you will." He's right and you both know it. You would ride him right here in your own damn car if he demanded it. You have a problem.

He lets you redirect his hand to the coffee with only a little resistance. "Focus." You hiss.

"Me or you?" Diego quips.

"Yes." You declare.

Diego's guffaw is contagious and you don't even try to hold back.

Your apartment always seems like an adequate size until Diego is inside. No, bad Bicki. Do not say it like that. His presence just sort of… lounges about in a vaguely threatening but highly attractive manner. Much like the actual man on your couch. You tried to pick up dinner on the way but he just wanted to 'go home'. You are disgustingly happy that your place feels like home to him.

Diego had flopped on your couch immediately and hasn't moved since. Something is very definitely very wrong. There were bursts of your Murder Panther in the car, but he has been just subdued overall. He had turned your stereo up and smiled faintly, watching you sing along. He had also complained that the stereo in your car sucked (Agreed) and this was unacceptable. You're sure he'll do something ridiculously extravagant to remedy this.

You try to give him the remote, he takes it but doesn't do anything with it. You offer him food, both junk and something home-cooked, all you get is a shrug. You putter around for a while, picking things up and sighing before putting them down somewhere else. His dark eyes watch you, unfathomable. 

Finally you disappear to the bedroom only to return in your pajamas. This he likes, perking up and blinking rapidly. "Okay, I know you brought something softer than those jeans, so get comfy so I can order shitty pizza and cuddle you."

His jaw drops in momentary shock. Then he scoffs, "I do not cu--"

You cut him off, "Yes, you do and yes, you're going to. Up. Now." This has to be hilarious. This short little woman in overly long pants barking orders at the massive man who heads an international drug cartel. Well, its either hilarious or fatal. I'm about to find out.

Diego looks around, as if someone else might secretly be here to witness him be a little bit submissive and moderately soft. He raises his chin in a tiny show of defiance. "Fine. But I am showering first." He glares with this proclamation, daring you to contradict him.

You throw your hands up in the air. Why the fuck would I have a problem with that?? His eyes follow your hands, like a cat when you try to point out a bit of food but all it does is rub your finger. You sigh, resigned to your fate. "Of course that's fine, Diego. You know where everything is, have at it."

You watch his butt as he walks away to the bathroom. 

The pizza actually isn't shitty and Diego eats half of it by himself. When you offer him the cinnamon dessert sticks he shoots you a calculating look. You split the contents, pulling two sticks over to yourself and piling up the rest in front of him. His delighted grin is decidedly not calculated and you lose track of time watching him enjoy dessert.

He's beautiful like this. He wears a soft, silky t-shirt that is tight enough to help you get through the nights you spend alone. His hair is a riot of fluffy curls, free of product and clearly trying to break free of gravity, too. He hasn't shaved for at least a few days and that salt and pepper beard is filling in nicely. His face is unguarded, expression open, those laugh lines and dimples you love make frequent appearances.

After dinner you lay all over each other in some weird we-have-intimacy-issues approximation of cuddling. It works so you don't question it. He has his laptop and you have your tablet and together you have sporadic conversation. Its comfortable. 

Until Diego asks you a seemingly innocuous question that you know is very nefarious:

"What color do you like in cars?"

Your eyes narrow so much that you have trouble seeing. "...Why." Your low tone might be frightening to anyone else.

He looks at you over the laptop screen, brown eyes innocently wide. "Just curious. Your car is green. Do you like any other colors?" He slowly pulls the laptop closer to himself to subtly cover the screen with his bulk. 

"Diego." You slowly put down your tablet and start leaning toward him. He has nowhere to go, propped up in the corner of the chaise end of the sofa. "What. Are. You. Doing." 

"Will you let me take care of you? Just in this one way right now?" He licks his lips, brow furrowed in concentration. Building desperation shows in his eyes and you can't fight that. You don't want to win this.

"Let me see, baby." Your sighed acquiescence has an instantaneous effect. Diego drops the tension from his shoulders and opens an arm to you in invitation. You crawl up him to cuddle into his chest, wedged on your side between all those muscles and the back of the sectional. From here you are stationed directly in front of the laptop screen.

He is looking at cars. 

Armored cars. 

Armored, bulletproof, explosive resistant cars. 

What. The. Fuck.

"Diego, what the fuck is going on?!?" Your apprehensive demand sets him right back on edge. You can feel him go tense underneath you. The laptop gets shoved onto an empty cushion as you throw yourself over him. Tiny hands land on those broad shoulders with extreme force as you use all of your deadweight to trap him. Below you, Diego shakes but you can't tell if its from anger or anxiety because his eyes are scrunched closed tightly. "Tell me why I need a fucking bulletproof car!"

He surges up into your face to match your volume, "She knows! Mi hermana perra knows about you! Alicia found out about us!" You lurch back in shock, but the steel hands on your hips stop you from retreating. His voice is hoarse, louder than you've ever heard him, and its terrifying. Your fear must show because he releases his grip on you like it burns. 

"WHAT?" The ramifications here could truly be lethal. Alicia has already tried to set Diego up to take the fall when they were arrested almost four months ago. You know she has scorned Diego's familiarity with his men in the past, that is why he handpicks them personally. To Alicia, everyone is disposable, even her own brother. Her only loyalty is to herself.

Diego's hands come up in an aborted reach for you. You're still too shocked to move. His face crumbles in agony and he blinks furiously, hands balling into fists. "Everything I have ever wanted she has ensured I never got. She, she manipulates me into destroying everything I touch. I will not let her hurt you! I refuse to allow her to break us, mi amor!!" His volume has steadily escalated until he is yelling. 

He's afraid. He is afraid that he will lose me. The realization emboldens you enough to take his hands in your own, bring them to your chest, and press them close to your heart. You trust that he won't hurt you in his rage. You don't fear him, this dangerous, powerful, ruthless man that you love.

His hands open to slide up your shoulders, curl around your neck, and his thumbs glide over the pulse point under your ears. He brings your face to his own, his expression twisted up with fear and anger and possession and love. 

"You are mine! And I will keep you!"

You realize everything that you have been debating with yourself, all of your pro versus con lists, your stupid little dry erase board covered in sticky notes with your fears, your scribbled timeline of events and possible future predictions, none of it matters. All you care about is the man in your arms. Diego is the most important thing in your life and you can't imagine a life without him. If you had to give up everything to keep him, you would do it in a heartbeat. 

Your hands grip tightly around his wrists and you consciously straighten your spine. Expression hardening, your eyes open to meet his anguished gaze.

 "I want black."

The armored 2020 Camry is delivered that Sunday. You thank him for finding something inconspicuous with an upgraded JBL sound system and he compliments your understated color choice of Black Sand Metallic. By the time you drop him off at the airport that evening you've managed to replace the new car smell with something better and you're thankful that the leather seats just wipe clean. Monday morning in the parking lot at work, however, is a literal ordeal.

---------------------

The next two weeks feel like they’re seven months long. You clock out at noon on Thursday to a chorus of your coworkers making vaguely lewd remarks and howling with laughter about your vacation. 'Two whole weeks on a beach in Mexico with an absolutely loaded hottie' is what they've been repeating gleefully all week. 

You turn around and walk backwards to give them finger guns, "Yes," then you reach down to adjust your pants, "And YES." Their squeals are contagious and you're still laughing when you burst out the front doors to drive home. 

You turn the volume waaaay too high in the car so that your teeth vibrate and it feels like you're having heart palpitations. I love this fucking car and I love that man. 

There is a rental Tahoe parked in the grass next to the huge gravel driveway at your farmhouse, but he left the second assigned parking space next to your Corolla open so you can park The Beast (as you have affectionately named your new ride) appropriately while away. When you get out of the car you glance up instinctively, Diego is standing outside your front door on the small third floor balcony laughing. 

"Are you deaf yet, Princess?" He hollers down in amusement. 

You flip him off with the middle finger that wears the gemstone ring he gave you while yelling back, "WHAAAAT??"

His laughter fades as he disappears inside, leaving the door wide open to let out all the cold air. Were you raised in a barn?? Close the door, the electric bill-- You cut off your own thoughts when you suddenly remember that you haven't been paying that electric bill for the last six months. Nevermind.

Before you can start up the stairs, Sara, your first floor neighbor, appears on the porch with their toddler. "Hey stranger!" Sara waves with a big smile and the kid does the same but with some kind of unidentifiable kitchen utensil in hand. "That is your boyfriend, right? He had a key so I didn't think it was your ex but I wanted to make sure. I mean, from what I just saw it is your boyfriend. Also, holy shit, that's your boyfriend?"

If she says the word 'boyfriend' one more time I'm going to spontaneously combust. 

"Uh yeah, definitely not my ex. Sorry, I forget that you guys haven't really seen him before, I meant to tell you he was coming." You can feel your face burning and it isn't from the August sun. Sara fans her own face with a hand while mouthing 'he's hot' like you're somehow unaware. You forge on before she can start gushing aloud. "We're actually leaving on a trip tonight so I'll be gone for the next two weeks."

Now Sara drops the kid and scrambles over to whisper fiercely to you, "Oh my god, seriously? Where are you going? Wait, this is the same guy you've been going to see in New York, right? How long has it been, like a year? Is he taking you on a trip for your anniversary? I don't even know his name. Oh my god, that is so sweet!"

Okay, down girl. You're not sure who you're trying to will into being chill, Sara or yourself. 

"Um, we're going to Mexico. And yeah, he's the guy in New York. It's just a vacation." You don't even touch the relationship questions with a ten foot pole. You glance up but Diego is still inside, Thank fuck. 

Sara hops a little in excitement. "I'm sooo jealous!" She squeals. "You have to take a ton of pictures! I need to see! Oh my god, I bet you guys are such a cute couple!" You nod and start backing away, trying to wave goodbye so you can climb the stairs and then climb Diego. "Ooh ooh, wait, what's his name?" Sara hisses conspiratorially. "Does he speak Mexican? Is he Mexican!?!"

You suddenly remember why you tried to move away from this area. Repeatedly. "Yeah, he's Mexican and yes, he speaks Spanish." You sigh. Sara nods but continues staring at you expectantly. Fine. "His name is Diego."

Sara makes a stupid face like this is a rom-com movie. I cannot take anymore, you must shut the fuck up. "Okay, okay. I won't hold you up. But seriously, we can have a 'pics and wine' girls' night when you come back!" She waves maniacally before snatching up the kid and skipping back inside. 

I can't think of anything I would like less. Oh hell no.

You climb the stairs in record time before she can come back outside and start talking again.

Bastian, Julio, and a third man you don't know are in your living room. You do not care and your vague wave shows it. You can hear Julio's warm 'Gordita!' greeting as you spin around and march to the bedroom.

Diego is standing at your bed, tucking TMP into your small duffel, when you burst through the doorway and continue at full speed directly into him. He laughs breathlessly but holds steady against your weight. "Princess. Are you ready?"

You take overflowing fistfuls of his shirt, bury your face in his chest, suck in a huge lungful of air, and shriek at full volume.

"Uhhh...that is a yes, si?" He mutters uncertainly above you. 

You rear back to look up at him with a smile so wide it hurts.

"Oh good." His hands come to your shoulders while those beautiful brown eyes sparkle. The dimples and laugh lines come out as he absorbs your infectious excitement. Your hands shoot up to his hair to yank him down so you can crash your mouths together with bruising force.

The effect is immediate. He moans loudly and crushes you against him. You dig nails into his neck and you lick your way into his mouth, his hands snake down to your ass to hold tight. Your left leg comes up as you try to wrap it around his hips. With a pained groan he rips those lips off of yours and pulls back. Undeterred, you move on to assaulting his now bared throat, moaning like porn come to life.

"Princess," he gasps, "You have to sto-- uhhh, yes, bonita. Your fucking tongue." You're too busy licking his adam's apple to pay attention to words right now. "Nooo, mi amor, please, lo siento, stopstopstop." You get in one last nip of his collarbone as he pulls your head back via a handful of ringlets. His pupils are blown wide and he's panting hard. You stare longingly at his delectable mouth while making pitiful whines.

"Please, baby, pleeeease. You're all I've thought about for days. I need you!" You try shameless begging, you're certainly not lying. Petting over his shoulders and down that solidly muscled chest, you shudder and try to pull yourself back to him.

He closes his eyes with a grimace. "Flight! Fuck you on the flight!" He croaks, then yanks your hair harder than you like. The pain clears the fog just enough for you to blink back to awareness. You nod jerkily and step back. "Have to leave now to get there before dark." He explains in a rushed huff. You blink as you remember how time works.

"Right. Yeah, right. Okay. Okay." Straightening to attention you yank off the cardigan you wore for the air conditioning at work, leaving you in a tank top and ready to be productive. Focus on not-dick.

Diego shoves your favorite notepad in your face so you can see your packing list and not him. The distraction works. He has checked off every item in each categorized list but left the strike through action for your completion. You lower the notepad until you can make eye contact with him and intensely whisper, "You know I fuckin' love you, right?"  

He laughs so hard he has to sit down on the bed.

You go through every bag, touching each item and crossing it off your list one at a time. He did it. Everything but you.

"You know I don't need TMP, right?"

"Why?" He squints up at you from where he lounges across your bed. 

Your face heats up and you clear your throat. "Well, its, I'm. I have, uh, you. So I don't need anything else." The realization of how true that is in every sense gives both of you pause.

Diego surges upright to cup your face and bonk your foreheads together just a little too hard. You giggle and he huffs. 

"Mi amor…" he sighs for you, eyes closing in pleasure. You 'mmmmm' in response. Then his eyes snap open and he growls an order, "Get changed so we can go!" And punctuates it with a stinging slap to your ass.

----------------------------

You spend the flight with your face pressed to the window, vibrating in excitement, except for a brief intermission of seven orgasms in the bathroom.

The unknown third man is Joey, Bastian's boyfriend. Joey is even quieter than Bastian and just as cute. They're not overly demonstrative but clearly comfortable moving around each other. Joey works in "Packaging" and does an admirable job of ignoring his cartel drug lord boss being snuggly. Julio naps. 

The customs agent at the Cancun airport looks you up and down with wide eyes but stamps your passport with no questions. Its a five hour drive to Xcalak but Diego is adamant it can be done in three. You give him an eyebrow question which he dismisses with a vague wave, "They paved the road all the way to the southern border last year."

Uhh, they what now? You understand soon enough. The drive drastically changes outside of Cancun. The scenery is both beautiful and heartbreaking. There are occasional mansions with armed guards, high fences, and SUVs like your own current ride. Mostly though, its shacks and people on foot or riding bicycles, weaving to avoid stray dogs and huge iguanas. Could I handle this as my daily reality?

The first time the road sidles right up to the ocean you have a small meltdown.

 "Is that what I think it is?" Your soft whisper is accompanied by a shaking hand pointing to the left. Diego, crammed into the middle of the backseat between yourself and Julio so you could have an unobstructed view, indicates an order for Bastian to pull over. He reaches across you and pops open your door. You slide out with his hand on your lower back and take about a dozen steps to the lapping water. Diego appears to your right, watching you intently.

 "Its gre-e-e-en!" Your stuttering squeal is accompanied by happy tears and you fling yourself into Diego with joy. He laughs at you, but hugs you back just as tightly.

----------------------------

The first week passes in a blur of amazing food, warm green sea, fruity drinks, and shirtless wet Diego. And so many orgasms that you can't keep count. Diego is all over you non-stop, more than he ever has been before (Astonishingly). Its incredible and you feel like the only person in the world. If he's not molesting you then he is at least touching you; keeping you in his lap, holding your hand, cuddling and petting and snuggling like a man obsessed. 

You love it. You love him. You love this life.

On Saturday he lets you lead him through the tiny town, your Spanish improving by leaps and bounds as you try to navigate the streets and alleys and shops. The four years of high school Spanish actually prove useful as you manage to complete a purchase all by yourself. Your playful mock smugness evaporates under the blazing desire in his eyes. 

He drags you back to the casita in a much shorter and more direct route than you took upon earlier departure. You're marched directly to the bed and he puts one massive hand in the middle of your chest to gently push you down onto your back. There is something different about this, something important in his eyes. Your voice is high and soft, "Diego?"

He climbs up between your legs and leans down to kiss you senseless. It goes on forever; soft lips, scratchy beard, silky tongue, and nothing but the taste of Diego. Your moans and sighs are mixed together, there are moments when you can't tell who is making what noise. His hands are shaking as he strokes every inch of newly bared and sunburnt sensitive skin while undressing you. 

It takes repeated attempts, but you finally get him naked, too. The sight never fails to take your breath away. All that soft, and now freshly tanned, skin is like velvet to your touch. You're mesmerized by his muscles flexing and then evening out as he moves above you. He finally gets your linen pants untangled off your left foot and flings them across the room with unnecessary force. Your soft peals of laughter light up his face and it brings tears to your eyes. You reach a hand out to him, "Diego. Baby."

He comes up over you, threading fingers into your hair, kissing you slowly and thoroughly. You can feel him against you, fire hot and mouth wateringly hard, but he makes no move to take you. Your eyes open in hazy confusion as the kiss ends. Diego is watching your face, blinking back tears. 

He is holding your head still, hands like steel. Whatever this is, he needs it. And you want to give him everything he needs. Forever.

You're captured by his eyes, bottomless, soulful, and hungry. His raspy voice is soft and trembling with desire. "I love you, Bicki. I want everything. Forever, Princess?" 

Your chest compresses and your heart implodes. Scalding tears escape when you blink and you're nodding before you even know it. "Yes, Diego. Yes, baby, I'm yours." 

Your back arches off the bed as he comes home and brings you with him.

-----------------------

You wake up crushed under Diego. The sun is still up so you might be able to talk him into going out for dinner. You rub your cheek on the huge bicep doubling as your pillow and Diego sighs directly into your ear from where he is spooned up behind you. Oh yeah, we should have done this waaaay sooner.

He nuzzles your neck just to incite squirmy giggles and you don't even fight it. "I have something for you, Princess. Stay here." He pulls away and you whine about the loss of your pillow. His low chuckle burns you alive with want. "Stay like that. Do not move." You obey while you listen to him rummage around behind you.

He comes around to your side of the bed, still completely and unabashedly nude. Hell. Fucking. Yes. You love it. He hands your glasses over and you slide them on to take in the now high definition view of naked Murder Panther. The view disappears as he kneels down next to the bed so you're on eye level. His expression is very peculiar. 

His hands slowly come up to reveal a small box of black velvet. Time slows to a halt as he opens the box and presents it to you. 

Inside is a ring. Gleaming in platinum and sparkling with three tastefully large princess cut diamonds. 

Its an engagement ring.

Diego is proposing. 

He swallows hard and rumbles gruffly, "Now remember, you already said y--"

You cut him off with a shriek. "YES! YESYESYES!!"

In the time it takes him to blink twice with surprise you're on him. Arms around his neck, you throw yourself into his lap. He topples backwards and you ride him to the floor, already bawling hysterically. 

He stares up at you in shock as you nod furiously and cry all over him. "Princess. You… you are certain?" If this were any other time you would be howling with laughter at his huge eyes and lax jaw. 

Your answer is stuttery but determined. "Y-y-yeah. Put it-t-t-t on me already!" 

He laughs in delight at your order and the imperious presentation of your shaking left hand. The ring glides on easily, a perfect fit. It gleams up at you blindingly. After a moment of admiration you lace your fingers with his and sigh at the union. His other hand comes up to roughly brush away your tears. "I know you do not like labels so much… but, you will be my, my married... Person. Thing?" 

You stroke his bearded cheek in return, thumb lingering on that dimple. With a hard gulp you dive in head first. Fuck it.

"Yes, Diego. I will be your wife."

----------------------

The next time you wake it is dark out. You reach for a phone on the nightstand to your left and jump when you find one with a loud crack. Diego pops upright behind you, instantly on high alert. "Princess?" He hisses while covering your body with his own.

You gigglesnort, then meekly answer him, "I forgot about the ring and whacked a phone. Everything's okay, baby."

He sighs so deeply that his breath ruffles your hair. "Jesus fucking christ, woman. You are a menace."  He flops down on top of you and snuggles back into your warmth. 

You reach back with your left hand and grope blindly for his face. He licks your fingers as soon as they're in reach and you stuff them into his mouth as retaliation. He just sucks languidly. 

"Mmmmmm, I'm your menace, baby. And I have to pee." He nips your fingers but rolls over to free you. You slide out of the bed and stretch your arms high while arching your back. Diego groans painfully. "What?"

Diego rises to all fours on the bed while the sheet slithers off of him. "You forget that other people can see without glasses, huh?" You cock your head and realize that you have a shadow.

It's a full moon. And I just stretched naked in front of a sliding glass door. "Oh. Huh. I guess I do forget. Oops. I'll be sure to keep that in mind now." Your seemingly tame answer is directly contradicted by the exaggerated roll of your hips that makes your butt bounce when you walk off. 

"Fucking menace, woman." Diego growls as you push the bathroom door shut with a trill of laughter.

You never do go back to bed but you do wind up on the beach in front of the casita to watch the sunrise. Julio finds you both snuggled together late the next morning, still asleep on the covered daybed under the palms while the rising tide comes ever closer. At least Julio has the decency to cover your bare ass with a beach towel.

-----------------------------------

By the time you think to check your phone gallery you have… 1,792 pictures. WHAT THE FUCK. 

You scroll through the pics, there are a lot you do not remember taking. Was I that drunk or did Diego take some of these? One is a close up of your ass from below wearing a string bikini, I knew I wasn't that drunk. The next pic is Diego asleep on a lounge chair, one arm curled up above his head, muscles glistening in the sun, and swim trunks so low on his hips that it's almost obscene. Immediately following that is the same pic but with your own face photobombing about three inches away from the camera and giving a thumbs up with your left hand so your engagement ring is prominently visible. Oh yeah, I remember that one. 

There are videos, too. The first one is Diego making lewd comments while you twerk in the ocean for about ten seconds. Okay, that's par for the course with us. Next is you successfully backflipping off of Diego's shoulders into the green water to everyone freaking out. Shit, even I'm impressed with myself. After that is video of you gagging through a dish of octopus at some restaurant. Both of you are clearly visible in the shot so Julio must have had the phone. Betrayal. 

There are tens of dozens of the two of you in various poses and outfits, both disgustingly happy and blatantly in love. There's even a role reversal shot of Diego sprawled across your lap, one enormous arm wrapped around your neck and his knees over your own arm while you grimace and he laughs hysterically. The table to your right is covered in empty bottles and mostly finished drinks. An entire subsection depicts you asleep like you have a stalker. You count no less than 29 of you two trying on increasingly ridiculous hats in random stores.

You can't even keep count of all the close ups of a smoldering Murder Panther. You feel no guilt.  Aren't you supposed to be ridiculously attracted to your fiancé??

Fiancé.

You have a fiancé. Your fiancé is Diego. You are engaged to Diego Rafael Jimenez. 

I have to explain this ring to everyone. They'll have questions about him. People will want pictures. How do I explain what he does?? Oh my god, there's no closet here. I have to… find somewhere. And I can't I can't. Its-

Your head jerks upright when something touches your hair. Its Diego. Kneeling on the floor in front of you, he has unfurled a sheet over you to block out everything, and he waits there, watching you. Before you realize it your hands are reaching for his shoulders, just the feel of him, warm and solid under your hands, calms you. 

Slowly, his right hand comes up to cover your left. "No closet, Princess." His huge fingers grip yours tightly. You nod a little. He just watches you, eyes guarded. 

"Ask. Go ahead." You mutter. You can tell from his posture that he is uneasy, apprehensive. 

He locks eyes with you and his gaze is intense. He curls all of his fingers around your left ring finger. "Still yes?" 

The fear in his eyes breaks your heart. Your voice is shaky but determined, "No. You can't get rid of me. I'm your problem now, baby."  His expression would make a meeker woman cower in fear, you laugh weakly. 

He settles down on the tile floor in front of you, with the sheet over both of you. Its like four in the afternoon and I am sharing a blanket fort with my cartel boss fiancé while on vacation in Mexico. What even is my life? His elbows are on his knees, chin in hand. He studies you for a minute, you stare right back. He raises one eyebrow and you sigh in capitulation. 

"I don't know how to just be happy. I suck at it."  You shrug but reach for his face. Diego nuzzles into your hand while you stroke your thumb over his beard. 

"Habby isz nawt a berb." He slurs into your palm with a soft kiss.

The epiphany is like a cinder block to the brain. 

He's right. I don't have to 'do' anything. I'm happy right now. I've been happy every time I'm with him. And no one had to exert any effort.

People can define themselves. People can define their relationships. Why can't they define their own normal? I can make my own rules. Especially with someone like Diego as my partner.

His one eyebrow slowly rises as he watches your thoughts play out across your face. "You back?" He asks with a hidden smirk, you know its there from the way his eyes crinkle with laugh lines.

"Yup!" Is your decisive answer. Diego licks your palm. "I got better places you can lick, baby." You answer his smirk with a waggling eyebrow. 

The rest of the afternoon passes in a blur of play wrestling and inappropriate noises.

-----------------------

You do, in fact, go on a safari. Of sorts. Tours of ruins and jungle and cenotes, lots of side quests because the both of you are easily distracted by pretty colors. You probably added another thousand pictures of various palm trees to your gallery. The hat makes multiple appearances. 

Diego has to ship a crate home to New York because he bought you too many souvenirs. You laugh and tease him when he wants to pick out things for your middle sister and niece, until you hear his logic. 

"They were nice to me." He murmurs with a little half-shrug, "It was like being in a real family for a little bit." He studies the bins of painted shells on display in the little store with way too much focus.

You spend a moment deliberating before you decide to reach out and touch his elbow.

 "Hey," your soft voice brings his gaze your way momentarily before he goes back to ceramic turtle magnets. You take his hand with your own right and rest your left hand on his chest. Diego looks down where your ring glints in the light, then up to your face. "You know you're going to be part of that 'real' family, right?"

Diego's boyish little smile is heartbreakingly adorable. 

---------------------------------

The flight home is much shorter than you want it to be and you spend most of it asleep on Diego. At one point you wake up to see Bastian and Joey cuddled up together napping. When you look up from where your head is resting in Diego's lap he is already looking down at you with an unreadable expression.

"What?" You whisper softly. You stifle a yawn and blink repeatedly. 

Diego strokes one big hand over your hair and grips your jaw firmly. With a huge toothy grin he answers, "Mine." 

"Uh huh. How many times you need me to say yes, baby?" You smirk up at him with an arched brow. He seems to be reveling in hearing you readily admit your commitment to him.

He considers your question carefully while his other hand trails down the front of your body under a blanket. I don't remember having a blanket earlier. Finally, Diego settles on "Every day. At least seven times. Seven is a good number, right Princess?" 

Your body jerks as his fingers press between your thighs with steady determination. Your eyes flick over to Bastian and Joey, still out cold. You make a show of wiggling around to get comfortable, and, surprisingly, that involves spreading your legs. "Yessss." You hiss up at him.

Julio reclines his seat and exaggeratedly covers his face with a new hat. 

Seven is a very good number.

------------------------------------------

Your first day back to work is a circus. You don't think twice about your normal greeting as you enter the office suite. You swipe your badge with your right hand and pop the door, then wave 'hi' to everyone. Like usual. With your left hand. 

There is an excessive amount of squealing that makes you second guess going into a female dominated field. The whole day is a wash because you have a steady stream of people passing through your cubicle. You're glad you had the forethought to curate a photo album of appropriate images to show your coworkers despite Diego's repeated attempts to sneak a dick pic in there somewhere. You most definitely included the glistening swim trunks lounge chair picture. Squealing intensifies.

Everyone comments on the hat and you're forced to tell the story of the hat. How you once told Diego that you wanted to see palm trees, 'But like, in the wild.' And Diego had laughed so hard that he fell off the bed only to pop back up wheezing about a 'Palm Tree Safari' until you smacked him in the face with a pillow. Your coworkers think it is just disgustingly adorable that he never let you live that down. 

Your coworkers have questions:

When is the wedding? 

Where are you having it?

What kind of dress do you want?

What are your colors?

Are you going to do flowers?

What about the cake?

Who is your maid of honor?

How did your family take the news?

What about his family?

Are you going to New York?

Will you take his name?

Oh shit. I forgot about the whole 'wedding' part of this.

[loveylangdon]

What’s Clickbait again? pt. 5

Word count: 6.5k + 

Overall Story Summary: You’re dating Shawn Mendes but was in a long term relationship with David Dobrik and met Shawn through a collab David was supposed to have with him. David is now collabing with Shawn finally and finds out you’re dating the pop sensation and doesn’t know what to do.

Authors note: Ahh sorry for the delay my laptop broke and I've been working from an Ipad, this is somewhat edited but my iPad is so small I cry lol thank you, guys. This again is something I've come up with and has been floating around in my head for a while. I wrote this one in about a couple of hours so please be kind. leave a comment or suggestions for the last part in my inbox or in the comment section. Thank yall for reading Xx

pt. 1 -  pt. 2 - pt. 3 - pt.4 

*Not my gif credit to owner*

_____

y/n p.o.v. 

Sitting on the floor of my closet I’m at a loss, what do you wear when you want to impress your old friends and ex-boyfriend but don’t want to get your current boyfriend mad. 

Groaning you call out “Shawn” 

“coming princess” I hear his footsteps come into the bedroom 

“I’m in the closet” I sigh and face the door 

I hear him chuckle and peak his head through “hey princess what you doing” only seeing his eyes and eyebrows raised while he chuckles looking down at you 

“help me” pouting looking up to look at him 

“with what princess,” he chuckles “Picking clothes for tonight?” Finally stepping into the closet you notice he only had black jeans on and no shirt, probably contemplating what to wear as well. he looks down at you with soft eyes, “princess you’re so dramatic,” chuckling he goes to look through your outfit choices realizing you haven’t even picked anything and are just sitting on the floor staring at your clothes 

“do you even have an idea of what you want to wear?”

“uh no, that’s why I have my stylish rockstar boyfriend here to help me pick what I should wear because he knows what looks really good on me and what doesn’t” I reach my arms up at him as he takes me elbows and pulls me up, kissing my forehead he pulls me back 

“princess are you wearing my shirt” checking me out in his shirt that goes past my thighs he groans “maybe you should just wear this out, think they would know you’re mine” he questions pulling you into his chest resting his cheek on your head playing with the sleeve on his t-shirt while his other hand rests on your butt

“Shawn I’m wearing a band t-shirt” laughing in his chest 

“so you look good in anything, what about a silk shirt then?” He pulls away letting go of you and goes to his side of the closet looking through his button-up shirts “We can find one that's not too big-“

“Prince” laughing and wrapping your hands behind his waist face in his back “my clothes” chuckling 

“can we have one of my shirts as an option please” he turns and looks down at you 

“yes prince we can” you smirk at him knowing he’s going to be extra clingy tonight and not minding one bit 

“Oh actually, okay where’s your black dress that I like” he turns and walks to your side of the closet going through your clothes 

“baby I think a dress is too formal” laughing 

It’s not rare to wear his clothes but he’s never been so adamant about it, knowing I would wear anything for him and how he is so supportive of my outfit choices, with me leaving the house wearing literally anything, he would still stand there to hype me up. 

“ok, your friends are boring already” chuckling he looks over his shoulder at you “joking honey joking” he smiles going back to the rack of clothes and sighs “just wear one of my shirts please” he looks back pouting at you with the softest puppy dog eyes he knows you can’t resist.

Smiling up at him “Okay prince pick one, and jeans with boots” 

“where is the Saint Laurent striped shirt with the mesh black stripes that I wore for V magazine?” He looks down at you 

‘SHAWN PETER it’s see-through” 

He shrugs “and my girlfriends hot so what? With black jeans tucked in,” He asked as a question “unbuttoned, 4 buttons” he’s smirking down at you now 

“Okay okay” blushing you look up at him “it’s on the clothing rack in the living room” he turns to leave smiling from ear to ear 

You go into the bedroom to change your bra into a nicer set so if Shawn really leaves four buttons unbuttoned it’ll be cute and sexy looking. Hearing him come back in you sit on the bed and wait. 

Walking through the doorway he now has on his white shirt that’s cut off at the bottom and he’s holding up his saint Laurent silk striped shirt like he just won a prize 

“I found it” he moves his head from behind the shirt to look over you, his eyes darken when he sees you in ripped jeans and a lace bra, groaning he lowers the shirt and walks over to you “Princess why- I don’t think we can go now” he moves in front of you dropping the shirt on the floor and putting his arms behind your elbows efficiently pushing you up higher on the bed so you’re laying down and he’s on top of you. Him groaning again he lays his head just above your boobs and rests his chin in your cleavage. 

Laughing at how your giant of a boyfriend is trying to get comfy on top of you with his legs dangling half off the bed. Running your fingers through his hair he goes to say something but is muffled with his face on your boobs

“Prince stop mumbling what?”

“I really shouldn’t have put a shirt on” he huffs and kisses your chest

He rest’s his cheek on you and looks up at you from behind his eyelashes “We have to get going, Con and Bri are waiting in the living room and I don’t think we’ll have time to meet Jeff at his place we might just have to go to Davids and meet Jeff there” 

“Okay let me put a shirt on and we can leave” you move to get up but Shawn hasn’t budged and he wraps his arms around you holding you in place you glance down at him 

“Can’t we just make out a little?” He looks up at you smirking and his cheeks flush pink almost immediately 

“My prince, there will be time to makeout later I promise and when we get back maybe we can do something else too” biting your lip his eyes darken as he quickly climbs off of you 

“Okay princess why are we laying around for let’s go” he quickly gets his shirt off of the floor and puts it on you unbuttoning 4 buttons so your lace bra is shown he looks you up and down groaning again as he huffs and walks out of the room 

Boys, rolling your eyes and you go into the closet to get some jewelry to accessorize it with. Shawns shirt isn’t as long as you thought it was gonna be but either way, you go to tuck it in your jeans and put on a Gucci belt with some cute heeled Saint Laurent boots. The shirt’s unbuttoned to 4 unlike the 3 Shawn usually has unbuttoned, showing off your cute lace bra and the silk material clinging to your skin in the right way hugging your body in all the right places. 

Doing your makeup and hair before getting ready proved to work better checking the time you realize it took you almost 2 hours to get ready and with Hollywood traffic, it would take at least an hour to get to David’s house. Putting on lipstick and a little more highlight you walk out into the living room to see the three boys talking on the couch. 

Connor sees you first and his eyes get as wide as you’ve ever seen them, “y/n uh you look good wow” he’s interrupted by Shawn throwing a pillow at his head and looks over to you 

“Princess” Shawn groans and drags out the S as he falls back into the couch checking you out 

You go to look at Brian who’s laughing at the idiots in front of him “You look really nice y/n Shawns clothes come in handy huh trying to impress the ex-boyfriend?” He questions as Shawn shoots up off the couch immediately 

“No, we’re not impressing the ex-boyfriend” he walks over to you playing with the necklace he bought you that sits snugly on your neck with another chain that dips lower into your cleavage, grabbing your hand and playing with your ring finger he continues “We’re impressing me tonight because I asked her to wear my shirt” he goes to kiss your cheek as you hum smiling at him.

Connor chokes on his drink “You picked the outfit?” He asks surprise evident in his voice, “You Shawn, let your girlfriend wear a see-through shirt, with her bra on display for everyone to see”

Shawn glares at him “Stop staring then if it bothers you so much, all I see is my very very sexy girlfriend wearing her boyfriend's shirt ready to go out to a party and her bra’s not out on display”

“Okay yes, but we’re going to her ex’s house who has not once but twice tried to do something stupid to get her attention what are you gonna do kill the kid or have him drag her away and talk to her in private with her boobs out?” Connor asks 

Shawn rolls his eyes “Connor do you want to go or not stop being a perv, she can wear whatever the hell she wants dude she shouldn’t be limited to what she can/can’t wear because guys are stupid” he looks  at Connor with a what the fuck look on his face and you’re just smirking.

Connor shrinks in his seat while Brian is laughing hard hand clutched to his chest 

“Okay let’s go, princess, your grand entrance awaits” Shawn speaks as he leads you out of the house with the other two boys ready to show you off and meet friends you haven’t seen in a year.

______ 

Parked in front of Davids driveway was weird, never did you think you would be back here. Shawn parked the jeep at the end of the culdesac and you and the other boys were just waiting for Jeff to come out so you could all walk into the house with him and not just you four who weren’t even officially invited. 

Shawn didn’t let go of your hand the entire drive over, he kept rubbing your ring finger and you knew he was just nervous. 

Jeff came out of the house not even three minutes later with his hands raised “Shawn” he was smiling and somewhat yelling, walking down the driveway, Shawn let go of your hand and got out of the car, the other boys following Shawns lead

Jeff embraced Shawn in a bro hug in the driveway as you got out of the car happy that they got on so well, hopefully with Jeff’s support with Shawn the other members of the vlog squad would be more open to it. 

Not that Shawn and you were public or private you guys just kind of did things as it went along. Not confirming or denying but Shawn took a break to write the album and have the summer off and paparazzi was seldomly seen. After yours and Davids break up you took a break from social media so no one really cared what you were up to after, you kind of just faded into the background like an extra on a movie set which you were thankful for. 

Jeff disrupted your thoughts by bringing you into a hug, “I’m glad ya made it y/n we miss you around here honestly,” he said with sincere eyes 

“Jeffrey what are we to do with a hoodlum like you” you joked and pinched his cheek 

Shawn was smiling at you both and grabbed your hand as you guys were about to walk through Davids front door.  Connor and Brian behind you while Jeff was in front of all of you guys. 

Walking through the front door was surreal, you never thought you would be back here and nothing has changed except the neon sign in the doorway. The music was blasting on the surround system, you could see the glow of the fire pit outside and the clink of the pool table being used. 

You stopped Shawn from walking all the way in the house before he made it into the living room and told him to take his boots off, and Jeff giggled “See it’s like ya never left” Shawn gave him an uncomfortable smile and you squeezed his hand. 

Brian and Connor took their shoes off too and made there way further down the hall into the house with Jeff ahead of them 

“Can you take my boots off please Prince” You smiled up at him not wanting to undo the zipper and pull them off knowing he will gladly do it for you 

“Yes Princess here sit,” he said pointing to the auto-man across from the mirror before getting on one knee.  Then you hear a squeal coming from the hallway as you sat down 

“OH MY GOD ITS SHAWN MENDES” you heard Carly distinctly you couldn’t see her because Shawn’s body was covering you even at a kneeling position, so you assumed she didn’t see you 

Shawn chuckled looking down at you and kissed your forehead pulling off your last boot grabbing your hand and pulling you up. Whatever Carly was holding she dropped as it shattered 

“Y/N OH MY GOD” she ran to you and pulled you away from Shawn and in a hug. Attracting some attention from other people in the house luckily the music was so loud not everyone heard. 

Noticing staring faces of familiar friends and some Instagram models you embraced Carly as she put her face in your neck holding you like you were gonna disappear any moment. Shawn stood next to you looking around at everyone and the chaos that is a David dobrik house party. Confetti on the floor, beer bottles everywhere and a mess of the living room cloud couch.

You pulled away from Carly as you heard the sound something falling onto the floor hearing Erin squeal and looking up at her to see her embracing you the same way Carly did. Shawn cleared his throat as both girls looked up and squealed again going to group hug him. 

You looked around and noticed Jeff took Brian and Connor to get a drink and mingle making eye contact with Jeff on the couch he shot you a wink and went back to the guys’ conversation. 

You turned back to your boyfriend who was awkwardly chucking at the girls holding him “Carly, Erin this is my boyfriend Shawn” you smirked at them which only caused them to squeal again “Shawn this is Carly and Erin” you smile at him and he raises his eyebrows 

“oh the infamous Carly and Erin, Nice to meet you both, y/n talks about you guys a lot and it’s nice to finally meet you” he smiles and tries to pull away from both of them who are still holding him. 

Erin lets go but Carly isn’t budging “y/n you did really good, like really good” she laughs and looks up at Shawn who lets out a belly laugh.

Bruce walks in and his eyes about pop out of his head “Y/n holy shit” he goes to give you a hug and turns to look at his girlfriend who’s holding onto Shawn’s arm “Carly let the poor guy go” he laughs and goes to pick Carly up off of the floor holding her bridal style taking her away from Shawn but not before introducing himself. 

“Hey I’m Bruce, big fan” holding his hand out to shake 

Shawn takes it “Shawn, Nice to meet you, I like your stuff you’re good” referring to bruce’s music. 

Bruce just about drops Carly “Holy shit wait no way” he sets Carly down who stands next to him. He looks at you and you raise your hands in defense “IDK is really good Bruce” you laugh at him. 

His eyes about pop out of his head “Holy shit, thank you that means a lot” he looks at Shawn with a big smile as they talk about music. 

You head into the kitchen with Carly to grab Shawn a beer. Seeing Jonah, Erin, Dima, and Ilya in the kitchen you smile. 

Ilya and Dima are standing next to the kitchen island when you walk over you squeeze in-between them and bump their hips. They look down at you smiling Ilya goes to put his arms around your neck and Dima wraps his arms around your waist both of them leaning their head on yours “Hows Shawnie boy doing with the new crowd and crazy ex-boyfriend?” Ilya asks looking down at you. 

laughing “He hasn’t even made it fully into the house yet” you smile at them and they laugh with you. “Where’s David?” You ask and Dima raises an eyebrow 

“Oh he’ll find you don’t worry, word spreads quickly here” referring to the Instagram models who are heart eyeing Shawn from the couch and trying to sneakily record him talking to Scott and Bruce. 

“Yah y/n thanks for bringing your superhot boyfriend to the party and making us all look really bad” Jonah tries to joke but fails miserably leaving Ilya groaning 

“Bro shut up, you make yourself look bad you’re not even funny” Ilya snickers and Dima joins in 

“I’m gonna bring him a beer, don’t forget to say hi you two” you turn and look at them pointing at both of them while they smile wide and nod in agreement.

Peeking out of the kitchen and seeing that Shawn has made it farther into the house he stands in the hallway behind the couch talking to Jeff, Scott, and Bruce. You look over to Connor who’s talking to Oscar and Brian who’s talking to some Instagram model. You grab Shawn and Scotty a beer and head over. 

Wrapping your hand around Shawn you feel him tense until he feels your fingers on him he relaxes and looks down “Hey princess” you smile up at him and offer him the beer which he takes and hand the other one to Scott. 

“y/n if we weren’t both in committed relationships I would marry you right now thank you” Scott laughs as he takes a swig of his beer. You shrug and grab Shawns hand which he takes and brings to his lips to kiss. 

Jeff makes a choking noise with his mouth “Gross, you guys are disgusting” he jokes as Shawn laughs and moves his arm to rest behind your neck holding your hand. 

You put your other hand around Shawn’s waist he looks down at you and whispers in your ear “they’re really nice, and they love you” he smiles into your hair and kisses your temple. 

“Ilya and Dima are here” you look up at him and his head snaps to where you came from. Earning a laugh from Scott

“You know Ilya and Dima Shawn?” Scott asks taking a swig from his beer

Shawn looks down at you as if asking permission to answer. 

Ilya and Dima were the only people to know that you were talking to Shawn, moving to New York after yours and David’s break up they were the closest with a two hour flight, they came to check up on you often and make sure you were holding up okay. 

They were the only ones who sought after you also, after the breakup. Yeah, people called and texted but when you didn’t respond they never tried to contact you or to find you. When Ilya found out through a friend you were in New York city him and Dima flew out to check on you. Despite being David’s best friends they saw you as a sister and only wanted you happy. Without them, you don’t know if you and Shawn would’ve ever gotten serious. 

You always felt wrong having met Shawn for the first time with David for a collaboration that never happened and then seeing Shawn without David and after a while developing feelings for the Canadian. The universe had a sick way of making people meet and you didn’t want anyone to think you left David to pursue a relationship with Shawn because that's not what happened but you can see how it could be interpreted that way. When you told Ilya and Dima you met Shawn again and were thinking about going out with him, they encouraged you to do what you thought was best. They told you to follow your heart and things happen for a reason. You never knew if David was aware of your continuous communication between his best friends or not but you never wanted to say anything to cause them trouble. 

Shawn squeezed your hand and noticed you silently weighing the options he was about to answer Scott’s question when they came over. 

Ilya patting Shawn’s back and Dima going in for a bro hug and a handshake after Ilya 

“Shawnie boy” Ilya smirks at him standing next to him and Dima joins standing on the other side of Shawn pushing you out of the way laughing, all going to cross their arms over their chest and make stupid faces at the same time

Everyone bursts into laughter over their stupid faces and stance when one of Shawn’s songs come on over the sound system. Everyone gets quiet and bursts into even more laughter. 

Carly and Erin jump on the couch and start belting the words to ‘There’s Nothing Holding Me Back’ While Shawn nods his head along and adlibs to it with everyone. as Heath and Mariah walk in from the backyard 

Heath and Mariah see you at the same time and in sync both go “Holy shit” making you burst into laughter, Carly and Erin are now standing and using remotes as microphones belting the words while everyone’s doing the same minus Connor and Brian who are just laughing at the idiots in front of them sitting in front of the fireplace. 

“David sent me to change the song, holy shit, well fuck its rude if I do now” laughing he walks over to shake Shawn’s hand “Hi, I'm Heath and this is my girlfriend Mariah” Shawn accepts the handshake and smiles over at Mariah who’s clinging onto Heath 

“You guys are a cute couple, y/n always shows me pictures,” Shawn tells them as Heath puts a hand over his heart his mouth forming into an ‘O’ shape and looking at yours and Shawn’s intertwined fingers

“Oh baby I missed you” Heath lets go of Mariah and gives you a hug when you hear Zane

“BABY” Zane walks in and sees you running over to you and lifting you up by the back of your thighs, automatically you can tell he’s drunk as you wrap your arms around his neck for stability and you see Shawn hover slightly making sure he doesn’t drop you. “Where have you been you disappeared” Zane’s still holding you and trying to run with you in his arms. 

“Zane” you try to tell him but his hazy mind isn’t paying attention until Shawn taps his shoulder and Zane turns around and almost drops you before you can fall, Shawn, grabs your elbows to steady you and you hear Zane squeal  “OH MY GOD ITS SHAWN MENDES” and he goes to wrap his arms around your boyfriend 

“Wheres David he’s going to love this” Zane lets go of your boyfriend and goes to turn around to walk back outside when David walks in through the glass doors on his phone 

“Heath I thought I sent you in here to change the fucking song” Carly and Erin stop singing and freeze standing on the couch and it feels like the air in the room got sucked out. You see Shawn playing with his hands and Ilya and Dima go to stand next to you. 

David looks up and his eyes go wide “oh y/n hi, wow you look good,” you notice he’s staring at your chest and Connor snickers “I didn’t mean it about the song” David tries to defend himself 

“Don’t worry about it I didn’t take it personally” Shawn spoke up cutting him off and walking over to you and taking your hand in his. 

Heath whistles and looks away making the tension thicker

The song changes and everyone disperses from the circle that formed in the living room by Shawn. Slowly people make their way to the couch the kitchen or back outside. 

David clears his throat “I see you met almost everyone” David glances around the house and back to Shawn 

“Yah” Shawn trails off “Great group of friends here” he looks at David “Thanks for inviting us Jeff extended the invitation hope you don’t mind, y/n wanted to see everyone and I brought two of my friends as well” he nods over to Connor and Brian who quickly look away like they weren’t watching our encounter with David 

David clears his throat “Yah no, no worries, y/n always welcome here, here sit you don’t need to stand” David motions for you two to sit on the cloud couch.

Shawn goes to sit and pulls you into his lap as David sits on the other end jaw tightened when Shawn wraps his hands around your waist. Ilya and Dima walk over to the couch on the other side of David and David glares at them. “Go away, we’re talking” David looks at them as they sit down 

“Oh I know, there’s nothing you can’t tell y/n that she won’t tell me later so I’m here to make sure you’re not a dick” Ilya smiles at him taking a swig of his beer 

“excuse me?” David asks 

“What?” Ilya asks him with a smirk on his face 

“Why would y/n tell you anything we broke up” David glances to you and back at Ilya confused 

You can see that this is gonna turn into something so you stand up all the boys looking at you “We came here to party and have fun with friends so that’s what we’re going to do, Dave unless you have a problem with us being here or you have an apology I really don’t want to sit here and pretend what happened earlier didn’t happen so excuse me and Shawn please” you pull Shawn’s hand as he stands up hands on your waist as you lead him to the kitchen to talk to Jeff and Jason who just showed up. 

The rest of the night goes off without a problem, more people you didn’t know show up later in the night and everyone’s drinking and dancing, Davids getting some vlog footage. Shawn, Brian, Connor, Jeff, Scotty, Ilya, and Dima are surrounded by you talking about what you don’t even know. Not that you were bored but it was all guy talk and you had no interest. Breaking away from Shawn you go to find Carly and Erin. 

Walking outside you see Carly and Erin sitting by the fire with David and some Instagram models you’re assuming, you’re about to go back inside when Carly spots you “y/n” she calls from across the yard 

You turn back around and go to walk over to her when you hear one of the blonde girls snicker at you from behind 

“Why is she even here David doesn’t even want her” you roll your eyes at her comment if only she knew

Making your way to the seat next to Carly you see Natalie and Zane from across the fire pit with Toddy. 

“Hey guys, mind if I join?” You ask staring at them and they all nod their heads 

“Y/n you have to tell us how you and Shawn met and why you fell off the planet” Carly pouts when and Erin hits her arm to silence her 

You just smile politely, “It’s not really a story we tell, not yet at least we’ve been enjoying our little bubble” they nod their head in agreement 

“How long have you guys been together?” Erin asks 

“Um 8 months? Something like that but we were friends before and we were talking for a while, it took a lot to finally agree to go out with him” you hum and Carly, Erin, and Natalie look at you with open mouths laughing awkwardly you ask “what?” 

“y/n that man is literally a greek god what do you mean you didn’t want to go out with him” Natalie speaks up and you notice her sink in her seat after David shot her a look 

Laughing “I don’t know honestly, I wasn’t ready I think. But he was patient and understanding he flew out to visit me in New York and I would fly out to see him perform when I could we went back and forth for a while and I agreed to actually go out with him” you shrug 

“Does he always watch you like a hawk?” David asks nodding his head to the glass door, turning you notice Shawn’s gaze when he realizes not only you caught him staring but the girls too you can see the pink tint in his cheeks. He blows you kisses with the tips of his fingers and turns back to Jeff. 

Giggling you hear Natalie and the girls awe in admiration.

 “Yah actually he does” you turn to David “He can’t be far from me, touching is his love language its rare that I leave him or he leaves me.” You smile at Shawn watching him interact with the boys. 

“Well I think it’s adorable” Carly speaks up “I’m happy you found someone who treats you like a princess, I’ve never seen two people more in lo-“ David sits up from his chair interrupting Carly having his chair scrape across the pavement as he goes to make his way inside huffing. 

You physically cringe at the sound and look at Carly and see Natalies already glaring at her and she shrinks. Going to stand up you see Natalie standing ready to go after David “sit Nat I’ll go talk to him” you smile at her ready to make your way inside. 

Opening the glass door you notice Dima and Shawn behind Ilya while Davids yelling at him 

“You’re fucking joking right now Ilya you better be” Davids screaming at him while Jeffs has a hand on David’s chest 

“What’s going on?” You ask looking at Shawn 

“David walked in when Ilya was talking about meeting Shawn for the first time in Chicago” Dima spoke lowly to you 

“No douche bag I’m not its not her fault you’re a dick, you left her, you broke her you know that, what was I supposed to do, she left and had no one. You didn’t even send anyone to check on her you let her vanish. Of course, I went to see her”

“You’re my best friend Ilya why the fuck would you do that, your loyalty lies with me” he’s shouting

“Fuck your loyalty I’ve known y/n maybe longer than you, so yes I went to visit her and make sure she was okay because I’m a grown ass adult who cares about people David not everything revolved around you, fuck” Ilya talks back pushing his hair out of his face

“This isn’t about me Ilya this is about you going behind my back knowing I was a fucking wreck and not telling me anything” Davids fuming

“David it really wasn’t like that” Dima tries to but in but is cut off

“Shut the fuck up Dima we all know you do whatever the fuck Ilya tells you to do, you follow him around like a dog” he fires at him 

David finally notices you standing next to Dima and he looks like he’s about to cry “Did you tell Ilya and Dima about Shawn” he turns to look at you 

“David-“ 

“No its a yes or no question, you walked out on me and made sure I couldn’t find you, you sought out my best friends to comfort you when you’re the one who walked out on me not answering my calls to make sure you were okay”

You sigh and notice most of the house cleared out 

“Ilya and Dima came to see me, I didn’t seek them out. They found out where my apartment was in New York and visited me. We kept in contact after that” you told him

“Was this before or after Shawns concert in Chicago when you got with him?” David asks

Looking at him with soft eyes his eyes widen 

“So when I wanted to go to take my sisters to Shawns concert in Chicago but couldn’t get in but Ilya and Dima could that was because of you” his eyes get bigger “Ilya and Dima got them in, do  my sisters- do they know about you and Shawn too” his eyes are red and you feel Dima tense next to you 

You look down and he knows the answer. 

When Shawn had a concert in Chicago it was fairly early in your relationship the only people who knew were Shawns team and Ilya and Dima, not having seen Dima and Ilya in a while you offered them a backstage pass to the show so they could meet your new boyfriend. After David heard they were going to Shawns concert he wanted to take Sarah and Ester. As soon as his manager contacted Andrew, Andrew told you David requested a pass but you denied it. Ilya and Dima found out he just wanted to take the girls so they asked you for extra passes which you gave them. 

Ester and Sarah were over the moon when they found out they were seeing Shawn but were even more excited that you were dating the teen heartthrob, they promised not to tell David and just wanted you to be happy which they asked more than once if you were with Shawn. Shawn dedicated the show to the 2 girls who told you to follow your heart and find your happiness thinking it was the cutest thing in the world when they threatened him if he hurt you. 

“You left me, not even the house the country so I couldn’t find you to talk and then you come back with a new boyfriend, go behind my back and tell my best friends and my sisters before you  have the decency to tell me you’re even back in the country so I know you’re okay” David looks up at you hurt 

Now it’s your turn to feel like you’re going to cry, you never wanted to hurt David, Ilya notices your discomfort 

“Bro” Ilya starts 

“No Ilya don’t start, I want you four out of my house.” David stands up straighter “Shawn take your friends with you too” he points to Brian and Connor who are standing next to the fireplace 

“David” Dima opens his mouth realizing he’s referencing to Dima and Ilya 

“No Dima get the fuck out of my house” he snaps back “You not only went behind my back about y/n you both” pointing to Dima and Ilya “told her, no encouraged her to be with Shawn instead of telling her to come back and talk to me like you knew I wanted” he says with poison dripping from his voice “Tell Natalie to book your flights home because I’m fucking done with both of you I want you out of my house I don’t want to look at you guys right now, even better I’m sure Shawn will let you stay at his house pretty sure he has a thing for sloppy seconds” he  scoffs and goes to walk into his room shutting the door. 

Shawn looks over to you and his eyes soften “Princess” he reaches for your hand and you move away from him. He looks pained and you know you hurt him but you know you hurt David more. You didn’t realize you had tears running down your face until you feel Shawn’s hand on your face brushing your cheeks. “Princess” he tries again and you shake your head 

Clearing your throat you hear Natalie come in “I told everyone to leave um where’s Dave?” She asks 

Jeff points to David’s room and Natalie goes to walk over and you stop her and stare at her, “Can I talk to him” your voice cracks and her gaze softens 

“I don’t think that’s the best idea y/n maybe go home and I’ll call you when he’s calmed down” she smiles softly at you.

You feel like your heart just got ripped out of your chest all over again. “Okay, thank you and I’m sorry”

Natalie just gives you a soft smile and heads towards Davids room. 

Turning to Shawn he looks at you sympathetically “Can we go” you ask clearing your throat again looking at the floor 

“Yes, princess of course” Shawn speaks “Do you want to come back to our place?” He turns to look at Ilya and Dima “We have enough room and I don’t want David to freak on you when he realizes you two are still here” he asks softly 

“uh yah sure thanks Shawn” Dima speaks and Ilya nods his head 

“Let us grab our stuff” they both turn to walk down to the guest hall 

“Where’s Connor and Bri?” You ask looking around 

“They got an Uber back to the house” he hums and you can tell it pains him to not be able to touch you and comfort you. 

“Can we wait in the car” 

“Yeah princess we can” he goes to walk behind you with his hand hovering behind the small of your back not making contact but leaving it there 

He goes to open the car door for you, as you get in he opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. 

 “You know honey this isn’t your fault, Know that I love you and I’m here when you’re ready to talk about it okay” he speaks softly buckling your seatbelt for you and closing the door. 

Leaning your head on the window you see Shawn say goodbye to Jeff with a bro hug and walk to the driver's side of the car, not getting in because he wants to give you space and waiting for Ilya and Dima to get their stuff so you guys can go back to the house. 

You close your eyes leaning your head against the window as tears stream down your cheeks slowly. Never have you seen David so broken. This is what you were trying to avoid. You never wanted to cause him pain or more hurt. After Liza and him broke up but were still friends it almost killed him. Here you were witnessing his heart shattering into a million pieces but hurting deeper because you went behind his back. You broke the one promise you made to yourself of never hurting him and only you were to blame. 

______

Thank you guys for reading. Sorry about the delay my laptop broke and I was working on an iPad. This has been something floating in my head again so it's nice to know some people are interested. Part 6 will be up soon hopefully by Wednesday or Thursday. Thank you guys for being patient. Let me know what you guys think my inbox and comments are always open thank you so much Xxx

[swiftlythebest]

could you also possibly write smut? (if you can i’d like like to request bottom Nico and top Levi please)

Full disclosure: I don’t write a lot of smut, nor do I read a lot of smut. I’m asexual so it doesn’t really interest me. But I do enjoy a challenge when I’m writing and appreciated the opportunity to go out of my comfort zone. @lazygeisha helped me SO much throughout this process and I can’t thank her enough. I had planned for it to be under 1,000 words, but we’re over 2,000 at this point so... *shrug* Also, I didn’t want to commit to giving Nico a favorite football team, mostly because I’m a Giants fan but also a realist. The Giants aren’t getting any sort of wild card bid. A lot is under a cut because of the subject matter and also length. I hope you enjoy!

“Okay, so if your team wins tonight, they get to advance to a semi-final type thing?” Levi Schmitt, who was seated on Nico Kim’s couch, yelled his question towards the kitchen, where Nico was grabbing them each a beer.

“Yeah. So they’re a wild card pick right now, meaning they don’t just automatically get a bid. They have to prove themselves a bit more.” Nico made his way to the couch, handing Levi his beer as he settled in next to him.

“Oh! So this game is a big deal?”

“Well, at this point, every game is a big deal, but yeah, it’s a big deal for me specifically.” Nico smiled at Levi’s concentrated expression, clearly trying his hardest to fully understand the context of the game.

Tonight was supposed to be date night, but Nico had casually mentioned the wild card game and Levi had insisted they watch. Nico put up a small fight, ultimately losing to his boyfriend’s puppy dog eyes and relentless generosity. In the end, he gets to watch the game with his favorite person at his side, so not the worst loss.

For much of the first half, the game was fairly uneventful, with neither team really pulling ahead for very long. Nico spent a lot of that time explaining each play to Levi and making sure he had at least a small grasp on the overall action. On the last play before halftime, the best running back on Nico’s favorite team caught a tricky pass by jumping up, resulting in him landing badly and toppling to the ground. Without thinking, Nico lept up and gave a groan of frustration, startling Levi, causing him to spill the remaining contents of his beer down his t-shirt.

“Augh!” Levi yelled as the amber liquid saturated his shirt.

“Sorry, babe! I’m so sorry!” Nico searched around for something to use to dab the mess, but Levi just ripped the shirt off.

“It’s fine. That looked bad and you just reacted. Not a big deal. I’m just gonna toss this in the wash.” As Levi made his way to the nook containing the washing machine, Nico’s gaze remained fixated on his back, mesmerized by the movement of the muscles. The two had barely had time together recently due to conflicting schedules, only allowing for quick hookups with no time to fully appreciate each other. He had almost forgotten how incredibly hot his boyfriend looked without a shirt.

Levi once again joined Nico on the couch, still gloriously shirtless and overwhelmingly appealing. Before he could think better of it, Nico tipped the last few sips of his beer onto Levi’s lap, effectively soaking his crotch region. 

“Nico! Was that on purpose?!” Levi was already shucking off his pants, as Nico watched, shamelessly. “Are you horny right now? Is this what does it for you?”

“What, you? Yeah, that’s certainly what does it for me.” Nico bit his lip as he scanned Levi, now clad in only a tight pair of boxer briefs. “And it looks like you may be having some feelings of your own.” 

Levi blushed and tried to hide his hardening dick with a pillow. Nico reached out and snatched the pillow, slowly palming Levi through his underwear, causing him to let out a soft moan as his eyes became glassy. Nico’s hand retreated, earning a whine of protest. Instead of continuing his ministrations, he picked up a glass of water that had been sitting on the coffee table for an unknown period of time.

“So you’re abandoning me in my time of need to drink some stale water that definitely has bugs in it?” Levi placed his hands on his hips, cocking one sassily. His eyes widened comically as Nico, while maintaining eye contact, poured the glass all down his front. Hopefully, Nico wasn’t counting on this to be a sexy move because it truly just came off as ridiculous.

“Whoops. Well, fair’s fair, right?” Nico winked, playing into the absurdity of the moment.

“No, see, you spilled beer on me. That’s sticky. Water will just dry, you don’t even have to wash it! Well, maybe you should with that water…”

“You want me naked or not?” Nico raised an eyebrow, his hands playing with the hem of his t-shirt.

“You could have just stripped. That would have been a nice, sexy apology.”

“Listen, I didn’t think this through!” Nico exclaimed as he clumsily tore off his shirt, tossed it behind the couch, and made quick work of his jeans. He looked back up at Levi, almost expectantly.

Levi sighed, “You’re so stupid. And so hot. Fine, yeah, let’s do this. Your horniness is rubbing off on me.”

“That’s not the only thi-”

“Nope.” 

In a move that was far more graceful than it had any right to be, Nico pulled Levi onto the couch and slung a leg over his lap so he was bracketing his hips with his knees. In this position, Nico, who already had a fair bit of height on Levi, towered over him, causing the shorter man to crane his neck up and pull Nico’s head down so their lips could meet in a sweet kiss that quickly turned frenzied. 

They continued to make out fiercely, Nico beginning to roll his hips at a slow, torturous pace as Levi thrust up to meet him. Levi began to run his hands over the straining muscles of Nico’s back, reveling in the smooth hardness and delicious movements. He slid one hand down to knead Nico’s ass, causing the other man to moan loudly.

It had been so long since they had the time to build up to anything, having to settle for small moments in on-call rooms, the goal being to get each other off as quickly as possible. The lack of any sort of romance or foreplay was such a contrast to their normal sex life, so often filled with blissful explorations. Wanting to take full advantage of the prolonged time, Nico detached their lips to suck a spot onto Levi’s neck, spurred on by his pants and moans.

“Nico, oh yes, right there. Please baby.” Levi sounded completely blissed out, so much so that Nico needed to see him in such a state. As he pulled back, Levi whined, but Nico shushed him with a finger, marveling at how truly wrecked he looked. Levi wrapped his tongue around the tip of Nico’s finger, bringing it into his mouth and sucking on it with enthusiasm.

“You’re so hot like this, all worked up. I’ve missed seeing you like this. Getting you to this point.” Nico undulated his hips just so, eliciting a low groan from Levi, allowing Nico to extract his finger slowly, pushing down Levi’s bottom lip.

“You, uh, you’re very good - ah - at that. Getting me worked up. It’s almost embarrassing.” Levi’s flushed face turned even redder at the admission.

“That you want me? That my super hot boyfriend wants me so much? Not embarrassing at all, love.” 

“Mm, I like when you call me that. Love. You love me.” Levi lit up, catching Nico off-guard, causing him to falter slightly in his rhythm, too overcome by the beauty of the moment. Nico threaded a hand into Levi’s hair to help anchor himself and began sucking on his jaw, running his other hand through Levi’s chest hair. He loved his boyfriend’s chest hair; it was so incredibly manly in a way that drove Nico wild.

He pulled back, not wanting to mark Levi in such a conspicuous spot, “I do. I love you. I love you so much, baby. God, I want you inside of me so badly.” Nico moaned out that last part as Levi began sucking on his collarbone.

Levi laughed against his skin, a breathless, beautiful sound, “So eager, love. I guess I can do that. What a hardship.” As he contemplated how to best gather the appropriate materials without losing the momentum, Levi remembered the last time they had found themselves in this position. Smirking to himself at the excellent foresight of his past self, Levi maneuvered awkwardly so he could reach the drawer on the table next to the couch, extracting a small bottle of lube and a condom. 

While Levi had his back turned, Nico dragged a hand delicately over his back muscles, pulled taut by his movements. While Nico was the more obviously muscular of the two, Levi had a strength to him that was so overwhelmingly sexy to Nico. He liked being the only one to see Levi’s muscles flex and strain, being the only one aware of how truly toned Levi was. He mapped his hand over Levi’s strong back, bringing it to the back of his head to play with the tiny hairs at the base of his neck, leaning in to nuzzle his hair.

Levi, having acquired the necessary supplies, settled back into his previous position, readying himself.

“I forgot we left those there from last time. Thanks so much, past us,” Nico breathed out as he watched Levi coat his fingers in lube. He keened as Levi began to stretch him, delighting in the sweet burn and feeling of fullness. Nico rolled the condom onto Levi with a shaky hand, so overcome with pleasure and anticipation.

“How’s that for you, baby? Are you ready for me?” Levi spoke these words into the crook of Nico’s neck, lavishing the area with kisses.

“Yes, Levi, please. I need… please!” Nico let out an involuntary groan as Levi’s fingers retreated, only to quickly be replaced by his cock.

They both moaned at the sensation, locking eyes as they set a steady rhythm. Levi pulled Nico down for an almost dirty, open-mouthed kiss, both gasping into it as Levi thrust just right. Nico grasped onto Levi’s shoulders as Levi dug his fingers into Nico’s hips, sure a bruise would form.

The position was not ideal for Levi to move as much as he needed to, but he made do, greatly helped by Nico practically riding him in his intense enthusiasm. Levi took the time to fully appreciate Nico, slick with sweat, eyes hooded, cheeks flushed. His muscles strained with each thrust, rippling deliciously as they rocked together. Nico tilted his head up, eyes closed, and stuck his tongue out to lick at his upper lip, a movement Levi followed with his eyes and then his own tongue. Still with his eyes closed, Nico smiled, bending to capture Levi’s mouth, both of them increasing their pace.

Nico licked into Levi’s mouth, savoring the warmth and intimacy, as his hips snapped down to match Levi thrust for thrust. Sex had never felt so intense to Nico; he wasn’t aware it could actually be as good as it was until he slept with Levi for the first time. Sure, he’d slept with more experienced men who pulled out all the stops, but Levi made him feel loved and safe and adored. They moved together in such a delicate harmony, so familiar with each other while still excited to learn some new tick or desire. Truthfully, Nico hadn’t known what making love actually meant until he had been with Levi. He’d never say that out loud due to the nauseating cheesiness of the sentiment, but he couldn’t stop the thought from taking up residence in the back of his mind.

“Baby…” Nico moaned as Levi’s thrusts became more frantic. His movements stuttered as Levi hit Nico in exactly the right spot. Levi came with a yelp, followed closely by Nico, mouth open in a silent scream.

As they both came down from their highs, Levi buried his face in his hands, “Did I just make that noise? Really? That’s the sound I chose to make as I came?”

Nico chuckled as he slowly rose, wincing slightly and already missing the fullness. He made his way to the bathroom to grab a wet washcloth, returning to a still mortified Levi. As Nico cleaned them both, he whispered reassurances to Levi, letting him know that that had been unbelievably hot, and his reaction only endeared him to Nico further. As they were gazing at each other in a post-orgasmic haze, a loud whistle startled them both, causing Nico to tip sideways onto the couch, resulting in an awkward entanglement of limbs.

Levi burst into laughter, “I totally forgot about the game! I can’t believe we had sex with a football game on in the background!”

“At least it was halftime?” Nico mumbled out, face smushed into a pillow. 

They finished the game cuddled together, still mostly naked, save for some clean underwear. Levi absentmindedly traced patterns onto Nico’s chest, barely paying attention, more focused on his hunk of a boyfriend. While Nico’s eyes remained fixed on the screen, his mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Levi, so warm and soft pressed up against him. His thumb stroked along Levi’s opposite shoulder as he tangled their feet together even more. Soon, Levi began to trail kisses down Nico’s neck as Nico began to stroke Levi’s inner thigh. Ultimately, they missed the end of the game in favor of round 2. Nico really couldn’t make himself care all that much, even when his team made a triumphant comeback. Some things were just more important.

[hobiwonder]

~just relax, dummy~ | (m)

Pairing: Tae x reader

Genre: Insomnia AU. 

Warnings: smut. porn watching. foreplay. exam stress. 

words: 2.1k

Summary: tae has been promoted to ‘bf’ status and he’s using it to get you to relax before your exams.

a/n: request was that tae distracts you from studies bc you're stressed so here ya go. i added it to the Insomnia AU so new readers; maybe read that first. not proof read as always. i got carried away bc this tae is a little shit and too adorable. i hope you guys like. let me know :)

“Taehyung, stop.” You shrug your shoulder when he’s resting his head on it for the hundredth time and this was not the time for him to be distracting you. You had your genetics exam in two days and you still had two modules to go through!

“No you.” He mumbles like the five year old he is before resting his chin on your shoulder again to see what you were doing. Which was mostly just taking notes, colour coordinating them according to the topic and the questions that could be on the exam.

“Tae!” You shrug his off again – a tad bit more aggressive than you were going for and he ends up bumping back into your bed frame as a yelp leaves his mouth because of hitting his head on it.

“Ow.” The pout is visible and you are instantly turning around to rub at his scalp, mumbling your apologies while he revels in the attention.

“Ugh. Sorry. I’m just stressed. I didn’t mean to.” You’re gently rubbing his scalp as he watches you with the cutest pout on his face. Your boyfriend was cute as fuck ugh. Shortly after being in a friends-with-benefits arrangement, he’d finally asked you out. And you’d taken even longer to come to terms with the fact that you’d be in a relationship with one of the most popular man on campus and you were not ready to leave the little you’d been in for a while. Minding your business and enjoying your studies. But of course, this was new for Taehyung as well. The boy had been a slut – full offense to him – before he swore to be monogamous and asked you out.

The change in your life had seriously taken a toll on your studious nature because it was so easy for the handsome boy with his golden skin and broad shoulders to distract you. Whether it was you two going out to do normal boyfriend-girlfriend stuff or back at your dorm clung to each other like koalas. Though it never ended up as innocent as you always wanted to keep it. He was your safe haven to explore everything you’d only thought or fantasized about – which wasn’t too much until you’d come to know him – because that boy was game for anything. Anything. It was thrilling and kind of scary all at once but you were falling deepr and deeper for him because of the side of him that only came out to you as cliché as it sounds. He was a great listener. He’d figured you out so quick and knew exactly how to wind you down – help you through your panic attacks after you’d started to see the psychologist for your insomnia which was a story for another day.

What you are trying to say was that – he’s your now. And you want him to be in your tomorrow too. And that was saying something coming from a girl who’d let everyone go in her life to become someone so she didn’t have to rely on anyone. Taehyung was understanding, he didn’t pressure you but boy did he know how to slacken  your guard. Which was exactly what his stupid handsome face was doing as you tried to study.

“You’re way too worried babe. You’re the second smartest girl I know. You’ll kill this exam.” Your frown doesn’t go unnoticed and taehyung just smiles his adorable smile.

“Who’s the first one? All your friends are at best average, no offense, at their studies.”

“Oh none taken. I was talking about my mom.” Your eyes widen – smile threatening to break because you almost forgot that he was a complete mama’s boy.

“oh of course. How could I forget.” He only chuckles before kissing your cheek sweetly while your gentle rubbing where he’d hit head had turn in to a scalp massage. He was such an attention seeker. Like a puppy. Yup. He was a giant puppy you somehow adopted.

“What you do need to forget about though,” he takes his hands off his head, bringing them to his lap to hold them with his own and looking at you so seriously you’re perking up too – he may actually have a good sugges-”

“We need to watch porn and get your mind off this exam.”

You spoke too soon.

“Ow! Stop abusing your boyfriend! You’re so violent …gosh you turn me on.” You throw the cushion in your lap at his head – perfectly aiming.

He only smirks, wiggling his eyebrows before he’s reaching behind him and grabbing your laptop from the bed – you both were sitting on the floor which he still objected to. Entitled asshole. Good thing you liked him. You couldn’t go to his house because you weren’t ready to be heard by the whole frat house. You were uh – loud, just a little. But it was Taehyung’s fault. He was too good at sex things ugh. Fuck him. Wait you had. You chuckle to yourself remembering last night.

“What are you giggling about.” He’s typing something on your laptop that you can’t see but when he glances at you he’s grinning, “ see? I knew you wanted me to distract you.”

“Even so, my mind din;t exactly think up watching porn together you horn dog. Is sex ever off your mind?”

“Nope.” He doesn’t look up when he replies. Only asking you to sit on his lap after he’s done typing and has set the laptop on the side – the back of it facing you.

“No way. I’m not going to sit on you Tae. I still remember how it went the last time I did that.” Which you riding him reverse cowgirl. Yup. He was a major horn dog and he kind of melted your brain whenever he was around and you two ended up just going at it for hours – gosh even your sense of time was at risk when he was around.

“Just come here you party pooper.” When you shake your head again, glaring at him he sighs like you’re the one being unreasonable.

“I have to study!”

“You need to have a break…. We can make fun of the terrible plot?” Your lips are pursing at the suggestion. Hm. You did like to dislike things. A lot. Especially people.

“Ugh… fine. I choose the clip!” Taehyung only smirks wider as he pats his lap with the greasiest look and you can’t help but laugh at his goofy face.

“Stop. You’re making me rethink my decision.” He just rolls his eyes as you settle between his legs, his on either side of you as he rests the laptop near your knees so both of you could see the explicit contents of the screen that have you blushing already. Everything was just so… out. Penises everywhere. Ugh. They were ugly. Why didn’t tae look this ugly? He had a pretty one. Thank god. Wait what is happening to your brain.

“y/n, pick already. You’ve been staring too long.”

“R-Right.” You scroll through the site, most videos containing pictures of girls with semen all over their faces and wow… you can’t believe this was actually, kind of, tiny bit, arousing you. And you hadn’t even clicked on one yet. After another minute of scrolling – one catches your eyes. The thumbnail contains a close up of a girl’s vagina with a veiny hand caressing her folds.

“Slow, clit rubbing orgasm.” Taehyung reads the title out loud and you just notice how close he was to your ear. His voice had dropped an octave and before you know it, he’s clicked on it when he notices you pause on the video for a little too long.

“You want to watch this baby?” His voice is soft and he’s leaning over to look at your face from the side – his larger frame has you surrounded and his hands have slipped around your waist. Incapable of words at the moment – why were you so affected so suddenly? God, he was right again – you just nod. You did need to unwind.

The video has nothing else but a close up of the girl’s labia, pussy spread apart and swollen as a hand – considerably larger than her smaller hips, much like you and taehyung – is softly caressing her folds. The man is spreading the wetness around to lubricate for a smoother glide and you both can now hear the girl’s soft mewls. Taehyung is watching you. You can tell because his gaze is almost burning the side of your head. But you’re too in to the video that you don’t care that he can probably see each shift in your breath, expression and posture.

The wetness in your undies isn’t unnoticed by you as much as you try to ignore it.

“She likes it.”

“uh-huh.” Taehyung chuckles at how mesmerised you sound. Your lip is being held hostage by your teeth, hands suddenly grabbing at Taehyung’s wide thighs, watching the incredibly hot scene unfold right in front of you. There is nothing to make fun of for you in this video, damnit. The man in the video has now started to gently circle the girl’s clitoris, never breaking pace, pulling back the hood of her clit to zero in on the spot as her soft mewls turn in to needy moans. God, this was hot.

“You would like it too, huh? You like it when I rub your clit?” Taehyung’s words aren’t helping you snap out of this haze – instead pushing you further in to the lust that was fogging up your brain.

“Y-Yeah.” His hands are gently massaging your waist and you’re trying not to squirm on his lap. The man on the screen is still insistently rubbing the girl’s clit, slowly but surely building her up. Just then, Taehyung’s hands – both of them – slipped inside your shorts and it’s even easier for him to locate your clit and start palming it gently because of the missing piece if underwear. You always went commando at home and Taehyung loved it.

“T-Tae, not now i-I have to- fuck.” The high pitched moan comes out automatically when you glance down, watching Taehyung’s vascular hand inside your shorts as his long fingers slowly work your clit – mimicking the actions of the man on the screen. You’re still watching the video, the girl is louder than ever and now her legs are twitching – all the while Taehyung is slowly building up a pace on your clit, rubbing small circles on it as his other hand spreads he wetness that’s leaking steadily from your pussy. The feeling of one of his hands constantly rubbing your clit in wide circles and the other caressing your swollen labia and rubbing the swollen nether lips is indescribable. You feel like you have a fever and your hands are scratching at his thighs while you can’t take your eyes off the erotic video.

“Shh. Just let me make you cum baby. Relax.” You can only moan in response, your legs now over his own as you are spread open like you’d been countless times before. He loved having you on his lap. But when Taehyung slips two fingers from his other hand inside your clenching walls, the video is all but forgotten.

“Tae! F-fuck. Right there.” He’s rubbing the spongy spot inside your channel – not thrusting, just grinding his fingers inside you while his other rubs away at your swollen, blood reddened clit.

“Right here baby?” Your dry sob confirms his rhetorical question’s answer as you pant in his lap, head lolling back in his chest. You were so close.

“Cum for me baby. All over my hand.” And that’s all it takes before you’re grabbing fistful of his trousers in your hands as Taehyung still continues to rub your clit at the same pace and when you do cum – it’s nothing like what you’ve experienced before.

“Oh god! Tae.” You’re crying out as wave after wave goes through your already weary body. The blissful climax seems to last forever, slowly washing over you – just like the not slow and not fast paced rubbing he was giving you - your clit twitching every time Taehyung’s fingers swiped over it.

You’re heaving, limp in his lap when you’ve finally come down from your high, laptop all but forgotten on the side. Taehyung gently leans down to your head that’s resting back on his chest – taking out a hand from your short to push his sullied fingers in your mouth that you eagerly suck with a moan.

Taking out his fingers – he replaces them with his mouth, taking your lips in a sweet and dep kiss that has you sighing in contentment. For the next few minutes, he just kisses you slowly, tangling his tongue with yours – just some good old making out (what Taehyung would call it). You had become fluent in Taehyung speak.

“You’ll do great baby. Take it easy on yourself.” A soft kiss is placed on your forehead while your eyes automatically close, nestling your face in his neck.

God, you’d fallen hard for this horn dog.

a/n: i love this giant puppy. thanks for reading and please do drop by to let me know what you thought. 

[lunefarfalla]

Asin, A Sin, As In

Then one fine day, someone knocked on your door. Thinking it was Hoshi who constantly pesters you with condiments because he claims he always forgets to buy one despite repeated reminders from you, you opened it after a couple of knocks.

There stood Kim Mingyu in all his glory notwithstanding that dejected look on his face. He sheepishly smiled at you. You stared at him, shock evident on your face. You kept on staring at him for a few seconds, that familiar pain came back crashing.

“S-Serin, I”, he started. “Who is it, eomma?” You heard Sua scurried to go closer to the door and see who was the person currently blocking the doorstep.

“Just no one, Sua”, “Sua--” You and Mingyu both muttered at the same time.

“Appa?” You never missed the excited tone on Sua’s voice. She brushed past you and instantly hugged Mingyu’s leg. “I miss you, Appa.”

Mingyu crouched down to hug Sua, his giant frame enveloped your daughter’s small body. “I miss you too, Sua. I very, very miss you” Mingyu’s voice cracked. You saw a trickle of tear rolled down Sua's cheek until it turned into a waterfall of tears. Sua tightened her hug on Mingyu’s neck and he started to shed tears too.

You stood there, dumbfounded over the sight before you. All this time, you thought that Sua never seek for a father’s love and affection. She did not give you any reason to think that you are lacking as a provider and a parent. You clutched your heart, tears threatening to fall from your eyes. Seeing her and Mingyu hug made you realize that your daughter is a very brave girl. She understood what you went through and that made her act like she was fine all along. You failed, you thought. I failed being a good mother to her.

Wonwoo noticed that you had not come back to the kitchen and neither did Sua so he stood up and went to see what took you both so long. He was first greeted by your shaking figure, sobs clearly audible from where he is. Then he noticed a man’s crouching figure holding tightly the little Sua.

He froze when the man finally lifted his face and revealed the face of the person he long dreaded not to see again. The man who broke your heart and the man who abandoned the angel he now claimed as his own daughter.

All color was drained from Mingyu’s face when he saw Wonwoo standing behind Serin. It did not take that long to put two and two together to figure out why Wonwoo was there, looking so domesticated and comfortable in his white shirt and a pair of black shorts. “What are you doing here, Wonwoo?” Mingyu asked, his voice a bit hoarse from too much crying. “That’s what I should ask YOU, Mingyu. What are you doing here? Where is Chaeyeon?”

All color was drained from Mingyu’s face when he saw Wonwoo standing behind Serin. It did not take that long to put two and two together to figure out why Wonwoo was there, looking so domesticated and comfortable in his white shirt and a pair of black shorts. “What are you doing here, Wonwoo?” Mingyu asked, his voice a bit hoarse from too much crying. “That’s what I should ask YOU, Mingyu. What are you doing here? Where is Chaeyeon?”

“Sua..” that was the first thing you said after a while. You hurriedly walked to where your daughter was and pulled her gently towards you. Confusion was etched all over your child’s innocent face and a fresh wave of tears threatened to spill from your now red-rimmed eyes.

You carried Sua towards Jun’s bedroom, her little button nose now red and her sniffles frequent. You held her closer while you knocked at your brother’s door. After incessantly knocking for a few minutes, a baffled looking Junhui with headphones hanging around his neck and a roller brush in his right hand greeted you. “Hey sis— woah, what happened?” He shouted which earned a glare from you. “Wen Junhui, quit making your room a rock concert hall and take care of Sua first.” Before he can utter a single word of protest, you countered him. “Mingyu is here and I am going to talk to him so please..” you lightly pressed your temple and he nodded vigorously, which made you confused if he was still nodding or doing a headbang.

“Eomma~~” Sua tugged on the hem of your shirt and you turned to look at her pouting face. “Please don’t make Appa leave, please. I really missed him, eomma, please.” She pleaded while pouting. You sighed and patted her head. “Eomma will talk to you later baby, okay? Now be a good girl and play with Uncle Jun.” You cooed and she slowly nodded her head, her curls bobbing along. You closed the door and took a deep breath before going back to the living room, where a frantic looking Mingyu was seated on a couch. Wonwoo stood towering over him wearing a stern face and you cleared your throat to indicate that you were back.

“Serin..” Mingyu stood up and tried to wove his way towards you but Wonwoo blocked his way. “Wonwoo.. can you please leave me and Mingyu alone for a while?” ���But—“ Wonwoo furrowed his eyebrows in disbelief. “I am fine, I can handle this.” You placed your hand on his arm as an assurance and smiled a bit. Wonwoo sighed and hugged you, which seemed to be his way of giving you the strength that you badly need. “Thank you,” a grateful smile was painted on your lips.

While Wonwoo was reluctantly making his way to Jun’s room, you sat on the couch where Mingyu was sitting, careful to create a comfortable distance between the two of you.

“Mingyu, what is this all about? What exactly are you doing here?” You started and he heaved a sigh. That was when you saw the black circles around his eyes and his defeated demeanor. “Serin, I am here to say sorry. Please come back to me.” He mustered that familiar puppy eyes and puppy sad face which you used to adore. You were not surprised by Mingyu’s bluntness. He was always a straightforward person, the very main reason why he did not waste any time to let you know that he likes you after your initial meeting. He wooed you using his Greek god face and irresistible charm. He was a force to reckon with and it led to a whirlwind romance. Not surprisingly, Sua came into the picture and what you envisioned of what would be a happy marital life was broken by a betrayal.

Mingyu interrupted your train of thoughts when he inched closer to you and attempted to hold your hand. You flinched at the contact which made him retract his hand with that dejected look on his face. “I’m sorry? That’s all you have to say after two years? Wow. You’re really impressive as a jerk, Kim Mingyu. You lived up to my expectations, even exceeded it.” You scoffed and smirked. You willed yourself to put up a brave act. ‘He’ll never get under my skin and mess with me again. Not anymore.’ You mused.

“Serin, let me explain. Please.. I.. I have a lot of things to tell you. I admit, I was being a jerk and a big airhead all this time but I am here because I don’t want to continue living a lie.” You frowned. ‘A lie? What the hell is he talking about?’ Curiosity got into you and as much as you want to drive his humongous frame out of your apartment, numerous questions sprang from your brain and you never wanted to have all the queries answered, not until this moment. “What do you mean?” You carefully tread into that unfamiliar path of uncertainty but chose to take the plunge.

“I’m not happy with the way I live anymore. I feel suffocated. I thought I would be happy if I achieved my goals but all I felt was emptiness. My biggest regret was letting go of my two greatest happiness in life, all in exchange for fame and comfortable life.” Mingyu sounded remorseful that you suddenly had the urge to enclose him with your warm embrace but you decided otherwise. You need to see the end of this and succumbing to his vulnerable state was the last thing you wanted to do.

“It took you two years to feel regret.” You sneered in disbelief. “You know how I can be, Serin.” Mingyu said in a low tone. “I am ambitious and persistent. I won’t stop till I get what I want. So I held on for so long, until I forgot what I was actually working hard for.” His voice cracked. Your heart felt heavy. This is indeed the Mingyu you knew. He can be persistent to the point that he would blindly follow his instinct for the sake of his ambitions. You used to admire how he carried himself. So sure and so confident, an icon of strength and real character. He was the opposite of what you were. You were often mired by insecurities and he was your pillar. Yet before you knew it, his head was up in the clouds and you and Sua were left on the sidelines.

“When I found out that you and Sua were gone, I actually went to look for you but after a month, I felt so hopeless that I gave up. But I did not give up because I don’t want you back. I chose not to look for you because I know I will hurt you again. I was confused, I was hurt, I was ashamed.” A single trickle of tear rolled down his cheek again. “Imagine if I found you but I was still that stupid jerk who would drop you like a hot potato whenever it is convenient. I struggled to make amends with myself but I am messed up. So I drowned myself with work, alcohol and.. Chaeyeon.” Hearing her name coming from his lips made you flinch. You hated her, no, you loathe her. She was the home wrecker. Despite knowing that you and Sua exist, she snaked her way towards your boyfriend.

“I wanted to take the easy way out and made her my distraction. I thought she could help me deal with myself. I knew it was wrong. I was so fucked up that I agreed with her set up. She said she was willing to be my stress reliever, that she would help me sort out my feelings. I was so stupid that I believed her. I.. Serin, I don’t know what to do. With you and Sua gone, I was struggling to keep my sanity. I made an excuse that being with her would make me discern who my true love is. I used her, she used me.” He laughed bitterly.

“I was her trophy boyfriend. She would show me off to the world. At first I felt happy. She was a famous designer and I am a budding modelling superstar. The perfect pair so they say. We were the power couple. I basked in fame and glory. But things spiraled down a year ago. I got exhausted because she became very demanding. She controlled me. I thought it was okay before but a year ago, that was when I came to know that I made the biggest mistake of my life.”

You gingerly raised your hand and tapped Mingyu’s back to comfort him. His head which was hung low quickly lifted to scan your face. You felt sympathy, blame your empathic self, and you know that it was visible in your face that you are gradually softening up. “I shouldn’t be feeling this way, Kim Mingyu.” You whispered quietly. “Serin, I came here to tell you that I am willing, no, I am going to make it up to you, by hook or by crook.”

“Gyu..” You said and he smiled. He knew that he had started to break down your walls again. “I don’t want to give you a chance immediately.” His face fell. “Can you imagine what we went through because of your selfishness? I was devastated when I knew that you and Chaeyeon became an item. You used to assure me that it was all work but your actions convey otherwise. When we left, I want to bawl my eyes out and neglect my self. But I can’t, I freaking can’t because I need to be strong for Sua. I can go through the heartache and be whole again but I have to feel the pain twice as much because my kid lost her father.” You clutched your heart and willed yourself to cry but tears won’t fall from your eyes. All you felt was hollowness and a tinge of pain in your heart.

“I’m really sorry, Serin.” Mingyu panicked when he saw you clutch your heart. “If only I could turn back time, I will think about my decisions carefully. Damn, I’m such an idiot.” He silently cursed and moved slowly towards you. He gradually wrapped his arms around you. You did not fight it anymore, you were too weak to move and whether you admit it or not, you missed his scent, his warmth, basically everything about him.

Your hands moved on its own accord and you found yourself embracing Mingyu with all your might. It’s like you are afraid that he will be gone again if you don’t hold him very close. Mingyu warmed up in your embrace and began to whisper sweet nothings in your ear. You closed your eyes and nestled your head on his neck, gently breathing in his addictive scent.

Your embrace lingered for a little while. Mingyu did not dare to move for fear that the spell would be broken and he will be pulled back to the reality again. Hugging you was like holding his universe. He was scared to let you go but he knew that a lot of things need to be fixed. Holding you close one last time, he slowly pulled away from your embrace and lifted your chin to meet your eyes. You’ve never felt comfortable like this way before. Looking again at Mingyu’s eyes felt like the first time that you were sucked into his brown orbs. His eyes were your favorite part of his face. It always has a mischievous glint but also the warmth which made you feel like home. Gazing back at him, you can never deny the fact that he was, he still is and will be your home.

“This is like a dream come true, babe. I never thought I will get to experience your warmth again,” Mingyu started and you smiled despite yourself. “but I know I have to prove myself again to earn your trust. I am glad that you will give me a chance.. Wait, will you give me a chance?” His thick brows furrowed and you giggled. Mingyu always has the tendency to think ahead and his babbling almost always got him into trouble. You hid your face on his neck while still giggling quietly. ‘How can he be so cute?’ You thought. ‘And why do I have the urge to just forgive him right now? Argh.’ You mentally facepalmed. Trying to contain your giggling fits coupled with your nagging thoughts, you looked up to him with a bashful smile. You nodded, albeit vigorously, to make it less obvious that you are still willing to risk everything for this man.

[steviemae]

monster among men // sp

requested by anonymous: sweet pea imagine to “monster among men” by 5sos 

authors note: this is probably really bad lol there aren’t a bunch of lyrics in this song to go off of so i did my best.  

You sat in the lounge with Toni and Cheryl, talking about the upcoming party Cheryl was throwing this weekend. The boys walked in as you were talking about it, Sweet Pea plopping down on the couch next to you, throwing his arm over your shoulders and pulling you into his side.

“What are you beautiful ladies talking about?” Fangs asked sitting down in the arm chair.

“I’m throwing a party this weekend. You better be there, y/n.” she said giving you a look that told you you’d be in some deep shit if you didn’t.

“Don’t worry, red. I’ll make sure she’s there.” Sweet Pea smiled down at you. His smile was contagious, you couldn’t help but smile back at him whenever he let his scowl drop and a giant grin take its place.

“Fantastic, this party is going to be a good one.” she in a sing-song voice. You guys continued to talk about the party, who was invited, who wasn’t invited, drinks and food. Everything that was expected to be at a party.

“Think of all the hotties that’ll be there.” Sweet Pea said to Fangs as he wiggled his eyebrows. You furrowed your eyebrows at his statement. You and Sweet Pea weren’t together officially, but everyone knew you were a thing. You started talking a month or so ago and Sweet Pea always made sure everyone knew. You didn’t have labels but your friends knew that you were with Sweet Pea, and he with you. So when Sweet Pea started talking about hotties you suddenly felt a little bit of your heart drop into your stomach. You no longer wanted his arm around you, or to be sitting as close to him as you were.

Your last relationship wasn’t the best. He always flirted with other girls. You never felt good enough for him and before you and Sweet Pea became a thing, you told him everything and he promised he wouldn’t be that way. He’d treat you the way you should be treated. Though he admitted to being an idiot and would probably mess up sometimes, but they wouldn’t be intentional.

“I have to go. I promised i’d meet Betty before class starts. Catch you later.” you said quickly getting up from the couch. You were out of the lounge before Sweet Pea even had time to react.

“Really, dude?” Fangs shot Sweet Pea a look.

“What?” Sweet Pea said confused.

“Think of all the hotties that’ll be there? Right in front of y/n.” Toni said smacking his shoulder.

“I was talking about for Fangs! He’s the only single one in this conversation. Hence the reason i directed that statement towards him.”

“Well, y/n didn’t see it that way. She heard you talking to one of your boys about all the hotties that’ll be there and you wiggled your eyebrows suggestively. You know how y/n is when it comes things like that.” Cheryl explained.

“Fuck.” Sweet Pea said standing up and leaving the lounge in search of you so he could explain what he meant. He found you in the room for the Blue and Gold talking with Betty. You hadn’t noticed him in the doorway, but Betty did. She nudged your arm and nodded towards the door. You looked up, your sad eyes meeting his sorry ones.

“Can we talk, please. I’m an idiot.” he asked. You stood up from your seat telling Betty you’d meet her here during lunch to finish and walked out of the room following Sweet Pea to a quiet place in the hallway. Leaning against the lockers you waited for him to speak first.

“Look, i didn’t mean what i said to come out the way it did. I meant hotties for Fangs. Not me, i swear. I’m sorry you thought that. I need to remember that you’re as fragile as a sand castle and it’s not hard to knock you down, even if i don’t mean to.” he took your hand in his, bringing it to his mouth to place small kisses over your knuckles.

“Sorry i kind of stormed out.” you whispered.

“I would’ve too, it’s fine. Do you forgive me?” he bent down so his eyes were level with yours as he did his best puppy dog face making you chuckle.

“Yes, i forgive you.” you wrapped your arms around his neck giving him a small kiss on his lips.

--

Sweet Pea had picked you up for the party that saturday night. You had got there a little later than everyone else so when you arrived, the party was in full swing. You and Pea pushed through the crowds of people, hand in hand so you wouldn’t lose one another, as you searched for your friends. Finding them in the kitchen getting drinks.

“You made it! I was beginning to think you weren’t coming.” Toni said pulling you into a hug, “also you look hot.” she said making you do a twirl so she could see your whole outfit. You noticed that some of the new recruits for the Serpents were here. One in particular you weren’t so fond of, standing with a group staring right at Sweet Pea.

“What’re the newbies doing here?” you asked Toni.

“Cheryl’s idea. She said it would be a good idea for them to let loose as they’ve been cracking down for initiation.” Toni explained. In the midst of your conversation with Toni, the girl had walked over and pulled Sweet Pea towards the dance floor. He didn’t hesitate to dance with her. It was friendly dancing, nothing too crazy or sexual, but the fact that he immediately went off with another girl kind of hurt. You shook your head handing Toni back the drink she just gave you.

“I’m going home.” you told her.

“Why?” she asked, eyebrows knitted together.

“We’ve been here all of five minutes and he’s already off with another girl. I don’t really want to stay here and watch as he flirts with everyone.” you said nodding over to where Sweet Pea was still dancing with the girl.

“What an idiot.” Toni breathed shaking her head at her dumb best friend. You had already made your way outside, wrapping your arms around yourself to shield you from the cold. After a couple of minutes you heard footsteps behind you and someone calling your name. You didn’t have to turn around to know it was Sweet Pea. When he reached you, he placed his jacket over your shoulders, immediately warming you up.

“I messed up again didn’t i?” he asked, his steps falling in line with yours. You just nodded your head and kept your gaze forward.

“I get that we’re not together officially, Pea. but it still gets to me when you go off with other girls and i know i’m just being an insecure bitch, but it honestly hurts.” he grabbed your arm to stop you from walking any further.

“How can i change this so you’ll know that i’m all yours and that i don’t want any other girl? Would making it official help this?” his hand rubbing your upper arm, noticing you shiver a little, “i just keep doing stupid things that hurt you and i don’t mean them i just, i’m a fucking idiot, that’s for sure. And i know we agreed to take things slow at first because you were still learning to deal with your last relationship, but i don’t want to keep messing this up because we’re not official and you think i’m just going to not want this anymore. Because trust me, i want this more than i’ve wanted anything else in my entire life. I don’t want to be the monster among all of these other guys that want you.” He took a step closer to you, cupping your cheek in the hand that wasn’t rubbing your arm.

“You shouldn’t have to worry about it though. I shouldn’t have gotten so worked up and walked out of the party because you were dancing like a fool with someone else. I need to get over these insecurities because i don’t want this to end.” you leaned your forehead on his shoulder.

“You have every right to be that way though. You told me what he did and it’s valid for you to second guess things. I’m not mad or upset with you. More myself than anything because  i just keep fucking up and i don’t want to hurt you.”

“Can we just forget everything and go home?” you asked looking up at him.

“Mine or yours, baby?”

--

It was Serpent initiation night and Sweet Pea had invited you to hang out at the Wyrm with everyone. They had dished the boys beatings out the night before and tonight was the girls turn to recite the laws, retrieve the knife and do their dance. The bar was completely packed, so you sat on Sweet Pea’s lap at one of the tables, listening as the girls screamed the laws back at FP as he asked for them. You watched as fear glistened in their eyes as they reached for the knife in the rattle snake tank, your hand squeezing Sweet Pea’s as the snake charged at their intrusive hands.

After all of the girls did the easy part of the initiation, they all went behind the stage into little rooms to change and get ready for their dances. You and Sweet Pea had moved from the table, letting some of the older Serpents sit down. You were now standing in the back of the bar, Sweet Pea leaning against a small table that sat against the wall, while you leaned your back into his chest. His hands rested on your waist before he moved them to wrap his arms around your shoulders, burying his head in your neck and placing a bunch of tiny kisses along you shoulder and neck causing you to giggle. He smiled down at you before resting his chin on the top of your head, your hands resting on his forearms.

The dances began, each girl looking more nervous than the next. Up first was the girl Sweet Pea was dancing with at the party last weekend. She had a huge crush on Sweet Pea and didn’t give a damn if you two were together or not, she flirted with no shame. You became uncomfortable as she never broke eye contact with Sweet Pea as she danced around the pole. You looked up and caught Sweet Pea looking right back at her.

“Unbelievable.” you scoffed, ripping his arms from around you and walking outside the bar.

“y/n wait.”

“No, Sweet Pea. If you want her, then tell me now. I can’t keep wasting my time with you if i think that at any second she can steal you from me. And you staring her down as she danced specifically for you doesn’t help that.” you exclaimed.

“She wasn’t dancing for me.” Sweet Pea said crossing his arms over his chest.

“Then tell me why she didn’t break eye contact with you once during the whole thing. Her eyes were on you the whole time, Sweet Pea. And yours never left her either.” you said crossing your own arms.

“For fucks sake. I’m sorry. She told me beforehand that she was nervous and i said if you focus on one thing the rest of the room will disappear, i didn't tell her to focus on me. I’ve made it clear to her that there is never going to be anything between her and i because it’s always going to be you. Tell me how i can fix this, y/n.”

“You can’t. I have to fix myself first. I just keep reading too much into things and jumping to conclusions and running away without talking to you first.”

“But i’m the monster making you feel so insecure about us.”

“You’re not a monster, Pea. Far from it actually.”  

“Be my girlfriend. Officially. No more questioning us anymore.” he whispered putting his forehead against yours.

“Okay.” you smiled. He smiled back before cupping your cheek and placing his lips on yours, sealing the answer to his question with a kiss.

[mona-stay]

He Gets Jealous...

hiyaa everyone sorry its been ages since i posted last I’ve had a bit of writers bock but i think I'm over it now :) and will have more up soon. I’m also thinking about starting supernatural fan fics what do you all think would you like that?? please let me know <3 

Sweet pea - random serpent

sweet pea was a jealous person, your neck would always be coated in bite marks from him, he'd always put his serpent jacket on you in school or in the bar.

tonight was no different as soon as you got off his bike, you could feel the warmth of his jacket over your shoulders. once inside you got your drinks from the bar then went and sat with Toni and Fangs. Sweet Pea had started playing pool and you grew bored after an hour of watching him win. "hey baby come have a drink with me you've been playing for ages let someone else win for a change" you asked him. "I will just one more game" he said kissing your head. The same thing he said 3 games ago. 

You went to the bar, ordering another drink. One of the newbie serpent's came and stood next to you smiling when you looked at him. "hi beautiful" he said in a smooth voice. You rolled your eyes at him at first paying for your drink. "so what's a girl like you sitting all alone for" he said. You turned to him "I have a boyfriend you know" you say. "well I don't that giant moron deserves you" he argued back. You rolled your eyes again telling him to piss off, looking you see sweet pea looking over at you as he sets the table up for another game.

"maybe you should take me up on my offer I can show you a better time than sweet pea ever could look he’s not even bothered we’re talking" he said putting his arm around your waist. You try to step out of his hold but the grip was too tight, before you could do anything the guys hand was ripped from your side, Sweet pea stood towering over him. 

"get your hands off my girl" he said through clenched teeth. You knew the look he was giving, his jealous someone is near you look. The other serpent started to laugh, "she didn't look like your girl sitting her alone paying more attention to me than you because you cant tear yourself away from the pool table" 

You groaned as sweet pea growled you already knew what sweet pea was going to do. Within a blink of an eyes sweet pea and the serpent where both fighting. You started screaming for him to stop, you hated him fighting getting hurt. FP and tall boy dragged them both outside you ran after them, sweet pea had a split lip, where as the other guy looked like he'd just stepped out of a boxing ring, he had blood dripping from his eye where sweet pea had landed a few hard punches.

Once fp stopped the fight you grabbed sweet pea dragging him back inside to the back room to clean up his face and hand. The silence was uncomfortable at first, you were mad he'd started another fight over nothing and he was a mix of still angry and guilty for upsetting you. You took a damp cloth, cleaning the blood from his lip and chin. Sweet pea grabbed your hand stopping you "I'm sorry y/n" he said looking down. "I know you hate me fighting and how jealous I get, but I couldn't help it when I saw that creep put his hands on you and then how he said you was giving him attention, I know it wasn't true I seen you try to move but my brain just saw red and I went for him. I'm sorry and I’m sorry for not giving you mt attention when you asked for it" he said.

You smiled at him lifting his head so his eyes met yours, "I don't like you fighting I don't like seeing you bleeding or the thought that you'll get arrested because of it. I don't care about you getting jealous, if I'm honest it's kind of hot watching you get all possessive over me" you teased. Sweet peas face lit up at your words pulling you closer to him as he kissed you. He kissed you rough and hard you could taste the blood still on his lips, it not putting you off one bit. "I love you y/n and I mean it I'm sorry" he said holding you tight. You shook your head smiling "I love you too now let me patch you up and we can go home then you can truly show me how sorry you are" you say with a kiss.

Fangs Fogarty - Reggie Mantle

Fangs was never a jealous person, he never had a problem with you hanging out with any of the guys down the pub or around Southside high. However since the school merge something was different. 

Fangs stood in the locker room getting changed after gym lesson. On the other side of the room behind some lockers he overhead a conversation that sparked the serpent's jealousy.

Archie, Chuck and Reggie where all on the other side of the lockers talking about his girlfriend y/n. "anyone seen the ass on that new girl what's her name y/n?" Reggie asked, not knowing fangs was in the room. Fangs rolled his eyes at their comments not letting it bother him at first. 

"yes she's hot, but isn't she with that serpent?" chuck asked Reggie. Reggie laughed "she was, but give it a week and she'll be mine, I'll take her from that snake" before fangs could go round the coach came in calling everyone out the locker room.

Fangs stayed back to calm his anger a little, he knew you hated him fighting especially if it was about you. Once he'd packed his bag he went out to find you. In the hallway he saw you with Reggie, seeing nothing but red he stormed over "y/n were going, you ready" he snapped not taking his eyes from Reggie. You looked confused at his behaviour but let it go smiling saying your coming now. Reggie stopped you from passing and grabbed your hand bringing it to his lips "it was nice to meet you probably y/n" he said kissing your knuckles. Out of nowhere fangs pushed him into the wall "don't you dare touch her, she's mine and always will be" fangs screamed at Reggie. 

Reggie steadied himself, all eyes in the hallway now looking at you. "little possessive there Fogarty, if you don't want to be a belonging sweetheart you know where I am" Reggie said leaning in to kiss your cheek. You frowned moving out the way of his advances, Fangs brought up his arm punching Reggie in the face "I said don't fucking touch her" he screamed again. Sweet pea and Jughead quickly ran through the gathering crowd to pull fangs away from Reggie. You ran out with them, once at your car you told sweet pea to take fangs bike home he wasn't in the right mind set to drive. 

There was an uncomfortable silence driving back to his home. You couldn't take it anymore, you knew the bulldogs and serpent's fought but this was unusual for fangs. "so are you going to tell me what that was all about?" you ask in a slightly stern tone. Fangs tolled his eyes "nothing I just don't like him at all" he said but you knew him better and that was a lie. "nothing? Come on babe I know something happened you don't go around punching guys for talking to me?" you said not taking your eyes off the road.

Fangs sighed, "something he said after gym, how you have a great ass and he was gonna take you away from me. It got to me, then I saw him flirting with you I just got...." he didn't finish, he looked down feeling stupid. "you got jealous" you finished for him smiling that he was jealous and worried about losing you. "yeah something like that!" he answered. You reached over touching his leg "hey you don't have to worry I'm not leaving you especially for someone like Reggie Mantle, and let him talk about my great ass, because your the only one who gets it" you winked at him. 

Fangs grabbed your steering wheel, making you pull over to the side of the road. Before you could ask him 'what the hell?' his lips crashed onto yours, his kiss was needy and full of love. When he pulled back "I love you y/n" he said looking into your eyes. Kissing him back "I love you too fangs, even more when you get all jealous" you smirked against his lips. 

Fp Jones - Hiram lodge

The town had all been celebrating Pickens day and not being from Riverdale originally you didn't understand the event. you had begged Fp to go all morning, wanting to go see what all the talk was about. after an hour of puppy dog eyes, kisses and promises of some extra affection later that night he finally gave in.

everyone from both north and south side of Riverdale was there, eating, drinking and dancing, a few of the local talented kids sang on a small stage. You walked round your arm linked with Fp's, eating maple snow cones, to your surprise were actually tasty. You both laughed walking around the little stalls, playing games and trying different foods. FP had won you a small stuffed bear, kissing your saying anything for you. 

Fp had been pulled away by Jughead, you told him to go you wanted to watch Veronica and the pussycats sing. After a few minutes Hiram walked next to you, "she's incredible isn't she?" he said with a loving look cast upon his daughter. You smiled at his pride in his girl "she's got a beautiful voice" you replied, still looking up at the band.

You and Hiram had dated years ago in university, long before he'd met Hermione. Out the corner of your eye you could see and feel Hiram looking you up and down "if I remember correctly you also have a pretty voice" he smirked making you giggle. 

"nice to see I can still make you laugh, you look beautiful when you do" he said smoothly, you laughed more "always the charmer Hiram" you said back hugging him hello. "you know how charming I can be" he said a little more flirty. You raised your eyebrows "are you flirting with me Mr lodge, what would your wife say" you joked, a sense of humour you and Hiram both sheared. "Only if it's working" he joked both of you bust out laughing.

Seconds later Fp was back, you didn't know what he'd seen or heard but you knew he knew about your past with the handsome rich newcomer. Fps hands went around your waist from behind, he pulled you back flush with his body, placing a kiss on your neck. "everything okay baby?" he asked hugging you tight. 

Hiram's smile dropped a little "I'm good enjoying Hiram's daughter singing" you said, leaning into his arms. Hiram coughed to bring your attention back to him "so y/n you should come by one night have dinner with me, God knows how much I've missed your company" he smiled at you. You blushed thinking back to the company you and Hiram used to keep late nights alone. "I'll think about Hiram" you say not wanting to be rude and say no.

After the song finished Hiram went to congratulate his daughter, leaving you in Fp's arms. "wanna head home soon" he asked not sounding to happy. You nodded following him back to his trailer. Once inside he grabbed your face placing a forceful kiss on your lips. 

When he pulled back you looked at him surprised "not that I'm complaining but what was that for, and the pda back at the park?" you asked wrapping your arms around his neck. "your not going to go to dinner with him are you?" fp asked instead of answering you. You brought your hand to his face rubbing your thumb along the stubble on his cheek. "no, I'm not especially of you don't want me too" you said trying to reassure him. He looked down at the ground "I understand if you want to go. He's good looking has a lot of money and power" fp said low. 

You lifted his head to make him look at you "he might be them things but he's not you Jones, and he'll never be you!" you say closing the small gap between you "I don't want or will ever want him the way I want you fp, you fill me with love and excitement in ways no other man ever could. Now quit with the jealous thoughts and kiss Mr so I can show you who really has my heart" you say in an almost bossy tone. FP smirked thinking how did he find someone as good as you. Pulling your lips to his in a deep passionate kiss. Image

Jughead - Archie

It took jughead a while to get over the fact his best friend kissed his girlfriend. He was thankful he had the serpent's to loss himself in, that's where he met you. You had been dating for a few months now, Jughead had gotten over Betty's betrayal and was finally happy again.

Archie had a performance with pussycats, and you'd made jughead go saying he can't lose his friendship over a girl nether of them were dating anymore. You both arrived at the town hall, finding Toni and Cheryl already there. The night had been going great, Jughead and Archie were like nothing had ever happened between them, laughing and joking over something only they understood. After Archie's performance he pulled you to one side. "y/n I don't know how to thank you enough for getting jug here to forgive me" he said engulfing you in a massive hug. 

Jughead noticed you had gone and went to look for you not liking what he found. Archie was stood against the wall talking with you, every now and then his hand touched your arm. Jughead's fists balled in his hands as he watched you laugh with Archie like nothing happened before. When Archie hugged you that was it for Jughead.

He walked up to Archie "I knew you couldn't change, Archie Andrew's dose what he want when he wants and thinks he's in tiled to everything" Jughead snapped before walking out. You followed him out “ hey wait up” you shouted but he didn't stop only telling you to leave him alone.

20 minutes later you arrive at his trailer. Opening the door not giving him the option to lock you out, you saw him pouring a drink. "so you get in a mood and pour a drink, looking a lot like your father there" you say taking a seat next to him, pulling the glass away from him. 

Jughead didn't look up taking the bottle swigging from it. "just go y/n, I haven't got the strength to go through all that again, just go to Archie like everyone else dose!" he said having another drink from the bottle. 

You quickly figured out he was jealous of you and Archie. Taking a drink out of the glass he'd poured, you looked at him. "so that's what this is all about Archie" you said, Jughead didn't answer. "look Juggy Archie's well Archie he may be everything a Northside princess wants but that's not who I am. The boys I love are weirdos, like ones who wear a stupid beanie, loves burgers and likes to write. So tell me Jughead Jones does that sound like Archie Andrew's or does that sound like you. I'm not leaving you for him EVER! Even if you get jealous and push me away" you tell him.

Jughead looks at you the truth hitting him you'd never leave him how stupid he was for even thinking it "how did I get so lucky finding you" he said wrapped his arms around you. "I don't know maybe luck has nothing to do with it" you joked, Jughead pulled you onto his lap kissing you deeply, thinking from now on he wouldn't let jealousy push you away again.

tag list

fp                                                                                                        @aliceswonderlandblog @princess-of-the-fandoms @Holding onto youth 

fangs                                                                                                       @superoptimist1997​ @sweetest-serpent

all riverdale

@slytherinstolethetardis  @that-idiot125

if you want to be added to any tag lists just ask :)

[praydastles]

Title: Cool off Fandom: BAP Member: Junhong Genre/Warning: Smut, kinda fluffy I need some fluff when I write Jun smut cos HES STILL A BBY IN MY EYES lol hes older than me, swearing (shame on you and your potty mouth!), public indecency (horny kids these days) it was meant to be teasing, but I decided Junhong is a good boy for putting up with you so he deserves something more...  Summary/Request: {Request} how about the smut is about him and his s/o on a date and he teases her in public ;) A/N: Listen to this x cos why not! Okay so view this x but, I also recommend to view this x Word Count: 2802

It was a relatively hot day and you knew that your comfortable season of layer up layer, thick jumpers and comfortable jeans was over. You face was flushed and your night shirt stuck to your slightly sweaty form due to the heat, so when you went to pick out your clothes you decided that it was only logical to wear something loose fitting and… short.

A cute crop tee that flashed just a little waist and a skater skirt was perfect for the weather ‘and for your date’ you brain added as an afterthought. You decided to bring a cap too.

Once you were ready after having a much needed shower, keys in hand, wallet on your person, earphones firmly placed and phone slotted into your bra strap, you locked the door and made your way to the bus stop.

Even the short walk had managed to make your skin form a thin layer of sweat, your neck and collarbones slightly shining. You fanned your face, feeling hot even in the shade, listening to your music as you waited for the bus.

The bus arrived on time as usual and you chose the seat right at the back, sitting by the window and daydreaming out the window. You barely paid any attention to the stops you passed and let out a yelp when someone’s body crushed you. You were ready to let that foul mouth your mother always told you off for loose, sharp eyes shooting to the person who had the audacity to wrap their arm around your shoulders when you saw the biggest grin on the biggest stupid fluff-ball you’ve ever met in your life.

“Shithead!” You mumbled punching him without much strength in the chest. Of course though, the over dramatic giant baby he was, he had to squeal like a little school girl, attracting the attention of the thankfully few people on the bus. “AH!” He wheezed, holding his chest as he fake gasped for breath. “Oh the pain!” He flung himself back into the seat, his free hand dramatically pressed to his head. You rolled your eyes turning from him and turned up your music.

“Hey.” Poke. You took deep breathes. “Hey.” Poke. “Hey, hey, hey” Poke, poke, poke.  ‘I will not commit murder. I will not commit murder. I will not com-’ “CHOI JUNhong I swear to God!” You seethed, lowering your voice to scold the childish boy beside you. “Hey baby.” He grinned adding a cheeky peck to your cheek. 

Junhong loved to tease you. It was so much fun to see your cheeks shade an angry red and your brown orbs deepen to the point he could see himself reflected in your lovely eyes. The way your voice would shakily lower when you were in public as to not cause a scene. How your hands clenched to resist slapping his smug smile. He loved it so much. 

His arm around you pulled you tighter to him as he rested his head atop of yours, ignoring your complaints of “It’s too hot.” “Don’t you know its like 30 degrees arsehole I’m going to die.” “You feel like a fuckin’ radiator, move!” Of course your complaints eventually ceased, eventually, when the two of you were a stop away from the city centre.

“C’mon baby.” Junhong and all his long limbs stood from his seat, careful not to his head, holding his hand behind him for your to hold onto. You roll your eyes, but took it anyway, feeling a different warmth as his large hand gently held yours.

Outside was surprisingly more stifling that the bus with the shitty air con that did very little to cool anyone. “Wow baby, you look good.” You looked up at Junhong who was taking in the sight of thighs being teased by a short skirt, trailing up to a very grabbable waist, your crop top fitting very nicely over your breasts. He blinked when he reached your face, eye brow arched and hip jutted out in attitude. “Done looking?”Junhong’s arm quickly wraps around you to pull you into him. He stares you down, licking his lips and whispers, “You’re barely wearing anything anyway, but... I really want to rip those clothes off of you.” Your eyes widen. Attitude fading into embarrassment and heat no long from the sun but from blood rushing to give your cheeks and ears a shade of hot red. You pull back quickly, shoving his chest and kicking his shin, “Perv!” You speedily walk around him, pissed that there was no breeze to cool your cheeks and that you felt your nether regions tighten as his words. 

Junhong chuckled, tilting his head to check out your arse swaying with your angry steps, your skirt inching a bit too high at times to reveal plump cheeks and ‘fuck no way is she wearing that underwear’. Junhong speedily made his way to you, his long legs allowing him to catch up with you in no time. You said nothing when he fell in step with you, staring straight ahead and hoping your cap shaded your still reddened cheeks. Junhong pouted, thinking you were mad. “baby~” He whined shaking his arms side to side, long limbs looking ridiculous. “Don’t be mad, you know what you do to me.” He pouted and brought out the puppy eyes, bending to get closer to your face. Your eyes widen, hand coming up to quickly push his face away and avoid him, scared he would see your flushed state. “It’s fine.” ‘Fuck, my throat feels dry.’

Junhong gave you a sceptical look. “It doesn’t seem like that to me... You still seem ma-” “ICE CREAM!” You blurt, wanting to avoid this painful conversation. Junhong stares at you, frowning slightly. “I’m hot so.. let’s get ice cream.” You take a hold of his hand, dragging him toward the ice cream parlour. ‘Maybe that will help to cool me down...’

There were quiet a few ice cream parlours in the centre, but you always preferred the ones outside, overlooking the river. You and Junhong entered the centre, relieved at the air conditioning fanning your skin; you still somehow felt hot though. Going up the escalator till you reached the forth floor, you headed toward the outer stores, walking till you reached the ice cream parlour. The inside was busy, no doubt people wanted to escape the heat. but outside had only a few people. 

“Hello and welcome to Kee-kreams. We are offering a 5% discount to people who sit outside, we know it’s hot, but we really appreciate your interest in our store.” A cute girl with chubby cheeks recited and you wondered how many times the poor thing had to repeat the line. Junhong told her that’s fine and the two of you followed her out onto the balcony. “Is this seat okay?” She asked leading you over to the far corner, a table by the tall glass to give you a view. You nodded enthusiastically. “Perfect.” “Great! here’s your menu, just press this when you’re ready to order.” You thanked her, taking a seat and looking out into the distance at the sun making the water glisten. 

“Shall we get something to share?” You turned to Junhong, having forgot his earlier comment and smile. “Sure!” Junhong had picked something tasty in no time and made the order shortly after. While you both waited, Junhong held your hand from across the table, absentmindedly stroking your knuckles as you both small talked. “Wait? So Himchan kissed Jongup? but he reckons it was an accident?” You say in disbelief. Junhong laughed, nodding his head furiously. “How can you accidentally kiss someone playing blind mice? He reckons he “Fell” on his lips.” You laugh, snorting to reply, “Please, Channie’s thirst for Uppie is too painfully blatant.”

“Orders up!” You both turn your head to the cheerful girl who seated you, hand detaching from Junhong’s as she places your shared dessert on the table. “Hope you enjoy!” You’re already licking your lips; mountains of ice cream, tons of chocolate sauce, wafers and cherries, what more could you want?

You were about to reach for the spoon, but Junhong grabbed both of them before you. He cheesily grinned. “Let me feed you baby!” You roll your eyes, “Really Junhong? Give me the spoon.” You try reaching, but his freakishly long arms pull back behind him. “C’mon shithead! I really want it so gimmeeeeee!” Now you were whining. Like a child. ‘Fucking Choi Junhong you’re rubbing off on me’  You huff. “Fine.”

And that’s how you eat for the next few minutes. Junhong swapping between feeding himself and feeding you. Him, purposely you’re sure, allowing cream to drip down the sides of your lips. “Ah!” You squeak in shock feeling ice cold substance fall to your chest. “Shit baby sorry.” Junhong says, rushing out of his seat to go next to you. Grabbing a tissue he begins to wipe your chest. “Ah,” He says with a concerned frown. “You’re going to be sticky now.” You gasp in absolute shock when Junhong nears his mouth to your chest and licks at the sticky spot, tongue lapping before his lips press to your skin. “Jun! What the fuck” He sits up, blinking innocently. “I think it’s okay now baby.

“Hmm I never knew the ice cream here was so good!” Your eyes squint in suspicion. You’ve both been here enough times and he sound’s way too happy right now. “Have some more.” His actions are so cute, you don’t have time to register the ice cream being swiped on your cheek. His tongue is burning hot against the ice cold treat and you feel yourself tense up. Again, he’s slowed your brain, made you into mush so when he dumps more ice cream - this time on your chin -you don’t have time to reprimand him then either. But, you also can’t help the little whimper that leaves your mouth when you feel how his tongue moves to lap at the cream.

“So good.”He groans when he licks at your neck this time. You look around, some people have left the outside, others having their backs to you give or take a couple of people and you can’t really see your table that well from the inside. Still, if someone saw... “Junhong.” Your voice is shaky; your firm and snarky voice barely stable a you feel Junhong place the cream lower, this time beneath your collarbones. His lips come to your ear. “Don’t think of stopping me baby. I saw those panties,” He giggled. Even in situation’s like these he was so casual about it, like it didn’t affect him, But the way he would rock into your body, you know it affected him. “You’re lucky I didn’t push you onto this table and fuck you baby. I was so tempted too, because I know how much you would scream and beg, God, I know how you would beg even if everyone could hear you. But, fortunately for you, I don’t want to be banned from this place, so we’re going to do this. Okay?” It wasn’t really a question and you didn’t dispute as he got more cream, splaying it over your chest to lap up. 

Junhong brought a hand up to roughly squeeze your clothed breast; hastily shoving his hand down your top to expose your breast. You whimpered, eyes looking around. Your cheeks were permanently stained red and you knew there was no chance that you would be able to cool down now. not when his tongue was steadily heating you from the inside out. You hiss when the cream is messily placed on your breast, trailing toward your stiffening nipple. Your knee hits the table when Junhong’s teeth bite your nipple and pull. “Fuck!” You try and shift more into Junhong’s face, feeling so exposed yet so turned on. Junhong sucks on your breast, hard and rough, his spit leaving you glistening. 

Junhong is usually patient; maybe it’s the heat, maybe it’s the delicious, maybe it’s those damn undies he know’s your wearing now, but his patience is gone. He can’t trail down your body anymore, he want’s his treat now. Your thighs are slapped apart and then he’s cupping your pussy, feeling how hot and wet you are. “I want to eat you out so bad baby. With that ice cream messily dripping down your wet pussy. I know you love my tongue too, don’t you baby?” His voice is strained, soft voice fading into a deep and needy tone that has you bucking against his hand. 

He rubs you quickly, your panties causing a lovely friction on your clit that has your legs spreading more. “How many time’s have I ruined you in these panties baby?” Your panting by now and can barely focus, your mind on alert, but your body begging for more. “Ruin me again.” You whimper. Your hand reaches for the cream, swiping and then looking Junhong in the eyes as you stick your fingers in your mouth, sucking hard. When you’ve released them from your mouth, you crash your lips to Junhong’s, a messy kiss that has teeth clashing and tongues bringing lewd noises, dribble messing the both of you.

You didn’t realise, but nearly scream in Junhong’s mouth when his hand shoves itself down your panties and find your hole, a finger quickly slipping in. “God, I swear you’re the devil.” Junhong says breathlessly, head in your hair as he works another finger into your wet pussy, clenching desperately around him. “I- umph, I could sa-ay the same...ooo.. about you” Your pussy is embarrassingly wet. Junhong’s fingers squelching in and out of you. Your thighs clamp around his fingers and your hip’s buck as your body is just about to fall on the edge. “Nope.” And the fingers are gone. 

“No,” You whine, even stamping your feet. “You can’t fucking, put it back now!” Junhong chuckles, tasting his fingers. “Lift that cute little butt baby.” Confused you do. Junhong shuffles till he’s manoeuvred himself beneath you. “Jun, no we will defin-” “The only way we’re going to be caught is if you can’t get your mouth shut. Hey, baby, eat the ice cream it’s melting.” His fingers dig into your hips when he rolls his crotch up onto your sensitive pussy. “Now.” He growls. With a shaky hand you reach for the spoon, but not before tucking your breast away. The waitress from earlier is showing some more people to tables outside and as you slide the spoon into your mouth, you make eye contact. You can see she’s a tad confused, I mean why would you be sitting on your boyfriend’s lap... But she smiles and turns away, just as Junhong has pulled himself out and is stroking his tip on your wetness. 

You stuff more ice cream in your mouth when you feel him dropping you slowly onto him. Your moans are muffled around the quickly melting cream and you feel like crying, frustrated both by him and by the fact that you can’t make a noise. “Wow! So you can keep quiet?” He teases, enjoying the way you shovel ice cream into your mouth. Once you’re settled on his dick, Junhong moves his hips, slow releases of pleasure working your body. You just want him to hurry, on edge that someone will see, but also wanting to finally cum. 

Junhong moves your hips a bit more roughly, trying to be discreet in your movements. Your dripping all over him and the noises your pussy makes as it swallows him as him groaning. His hand pushes your lower back till your slightly raised, leaning just enough on the table to look casual. “Just like that baby.” And then your crying around a spoon. His hips pistoned up into you, your arse cheeks rippling with the power of his thrusts. You try swallowing your cries, praying to God that no one can hear you from across the balcony. ‘Oh my God, can anyone from downstairs see you through the glass?’ “C’mon baby,” Junhong groans behind you and fuck, his voice is turning you on, “I can feel your little pussy wants to cum, so cum.” Your body spasms so much, that Junhong has to hold you to keep the attention of others turning to you. Your head lowers, thankful for your cap that can hopefully block the expression on your face as the pleasure slowly dies within you. 

Junhong pulls you off of him, settling your dazed self into a seat beside him as he finishes himself off into a napkin. “That’s disgusting.” You weakly say. He grins. “I’d rather cum in your mouth, but I think it would definitely look suspicious if you’re under the table huh baby?

[sixmorningsafter]

15 Review

I didn’t know how to start this review. Then you posted your character trailer and I was struck by how much this fic has evolved from the original 2-minute trailer. It started out as a fluffy rom com type fic and now it is a story of depth, of feeling and of growth. Sure, your humour balances out the angst, but what blows me away is the affection all your readers have for your characters even if the canon version leaves them cold. There are still times when I want to smack them around the head for being dumb (quite a lot in this chapter!), but I am still rooting so hard for all 4 of them to get a HEA (actually 5 including Kai).

Ahhhhh, Janet, my sun and stars! Sorry for taking a bit to reply to this - I was trying to get 16 cranked out (lmao as you well know) and I was putting off delving back into my asks until I did. Now that the chapter’s up and kind of terrifyingly out there, I can finally get to answering this glorious, lovely review, and I’m going to start with getting real emotional over everything you said about the fic’s development. I think I’ve mentioned it a few times, but I’ve always been aiming for a kind of Breakfast Club effect with this story where it starts out with a bunch of surface-level stereotypes for characters, gets them stuck somewhere, and then uses that idle time to dig past the labels and see what makes them human. Obviously SMA has gone way off the rails and is way more shippy and tropey than TBC, lmao, but it makes me so happy to hear that you feel like it’s transcended the raunchy romcom premise. It’s been a gradual but deliberate effort on my end and it gives me hella feels to know it’s working.

Can I just say how much I love the fact you started and ended it with Stefan’s POV? That end scene where he can’t help but be a little bit Nicholas Sparks (Stefan “King of Cheese” Salvatore knows who he is, but not Sia ha ha) and Caroline surprises him with the hot chocolate – aww. I also adored Ms Cuddles and Caroline having a ‘chat’ about Stefan – that was a really beautiful note, the parallel of Caroline softening towards both the cat and Stefan. In fact, the cat is basically a metaphor for Stefan, right? Caroline’s reaction annoyed me initially, I can’t lie, but her gradual rationalisation of her behaviour was really interesting and her thoughts on how it affected Stefan showed her to be compassionate and sweet. An interesting point was that Stefan felt that he lost control completely of the sex, intimacy situation, whereas Caroline describes him as ‘always having one foot on the floor, checking in’ – I’m not sure why I liked that so much, but I did. I love the tease for chapter 16 where these idiots actually talk to each other. There’s a line where Stefan talks (in his head) about him (or indeed anyone) not being worth that much angst and about watching her flicker from afar, both of which I loved because it showed just what a caring chap Stefan is.

Italicized the bit above because I’m so happy you caught that! It was one of those dissonant things I tried to sneak in to remind people that literally no one’s narration in this fic is objective, you know? Like Stefan’s sitting there feeling lowkey guilty because there was a moment he knew he probably should’ve pulled back but didn’t, and then later on Caroline’s thinking about how safe she felt because he never seemed to lose himself completely. I think on a backstory note, too, it gives a some indirect insight into Maroline and just how out of control Matt could get that by comparison, Stefan losing control felt like total safety to her. 

ANYWAY, that bit aside (I love how you catch those little things, btw), cat’s totally a metaphor for Stefan. To me anyway. I don’t think Stefan directly intended the parallel but this cheesy af author did 👍 And yeah, at their core, Caroline and Stefan are both giant cheese balls who are just trying to figure out what to do with their abundance of scary feelings. I think it’s good that Caroline’s reaction annoyed you, tbh, because it was supposed to be a last straw kind of thing. Not necessarily even for Stefan, but just for her. She gets sick of her own shit, which you probably get more of a sense for in 16 than 15. It’s kind of her breaking point. She’s like ‘holy shit enough this is exhausting’. So I think it’s good for you, as the reader, to also be exhausted with her, because she’s pretty much feeling the same way. 

(Aside: jeez the way you wrote the Steroline sex scene was perfect, not graphic or squirmy, but really hot. I now can’t wait to see what you do with Bamon! Things gonna get weird – I know it!)

I literally just figured out how Bamon’s going to go down (like locked it down in my head) and honestly. Weirdly feelsy. But also very hot and them, I think. Bonnie’s profession might factor in. But gah, thanks so much for the feedback on the SC scene! That was like my first time writing a sex scene in a fic (not because I’m anti-sex scene I just usually don’t make it that far in, looooool) so I’m so glad it wasn’t a disaster!

The ship stuff is great in this chapter, but I thought I was going to miss the friendship stuff. I didn’t because of all the cute references to the friendships that you put in. Damon doing his lovesick idiot impression AKA imitating Stefan – LOL! Damon referring to Stefan taking Bonnie to court for flamingo hate crimes - I nearly died at that little exchange. I also liked the parallel of Bonnie telling Damon about the Stefonnie V-day standoff (“yellow sucks and you’re a bad friend” WTF Bonnie? Baby love sick puppy Stefan - priceless) and Steroline chatting about Bonnie’s insane diet as a way of bonding (Stefan’s a feeder, his go-to strategy to smooth things over = food, head canon this was his major way of coping with his sisters and Bonnie’s mood swings). Bonnie is like the lynch pin in this fic and I bloody love it. The parallel of Caroline and Bonnie trying to get over Stefan and Damon by using extreme physical contact as a method of desensitisation. LOL like that was ever going to work - dumbos!

Aren’t they the stupidest human beings, though? Like do you understand how often I write literally any part of this fic and have to stop, stare the screen, and go ‘WHY ARE YOU ALL SO DUMB’. Like yeah, Caroline, riding Stefan in the middle of a dark living room till neither of you can think straight is definitely going to make you less into him. Obviously. How could that backfire? Yeah Bonnie, dragging a flirty Damon to a tiny little stairwell to bitch at him is obviously not going to lead to anything you don’t want happening. How could it? It’s so foolproof? They’re stupid. Anyway, lmao, love love love that all the brotp references could keep you afloat with the friendships this chapter, and love all the parallels you picked up on. I’m not going to lie, I miss writing ensemble scenes so friggin’ much, to the point where I’m a little sad 16 had to get split before I hit the group bits, but I can’t wait to get back to that. I can’t wait to get back to crowded mornings and furtive looks and smug comments and chaotic bursts of activity - it always happens whenever I have long night time scenes. I’m like ready for the reset of a new, bustling morning, and a large part of it is because of the brotp potential, so I’m super happy that part’s important to you, too!

Now for Kai. His cyber stalking, 6 ovens and secret room made me laugh in a somewhat anxious way, although I too aim for my Christmas decorations to involve a miniature train set up #lifegoals #weareallalittlebitkai. I get that Bonnie was terrified, trapped with a knife 2 inches from her face. She still slipped into her compassionate self because that is who Bonnie is at her core. This girl is a damn hero. I can totally see how down the line these 2 end up being ‘friends’ with the other 3 being dragged into this friendship group, kicking and screaming, although I caught Damon being friendly with him already. I’m really interested to see how the Stefan-Kai dynamic works out. I felt bad for him going off swan hunting in a blizzard and perplexed because it’s going to take ages to pluck and roast a new swan – Bamon are trapped lol.

Loooool, Kai, my little lunatic son. He means well? Kind of. I think he just doesn’t always know what ‘well’ is. And yep, Bonnie’s compassionate streak flares hard and often, and it’s already showing for Kai, although if you’ve read 16 it turns out that Damon actually ends up being the surprise Kai bestie. Honestly, Kai thinks they’re both great and has very enthusiastic and occasionally frightening ways of showing it, lmao. And HAHA, you know, Kai x Stefan is probably the only dynamic I haven’t nailed down? Largely because my instinct is to have Kai think he’s shady/get an inexplicably bad vibe from him (because COME ON HOW FUNNY IS THAT), and I feel like Stefan’s constantly getting the short end of the stick with these people, but lmao, who knows. I might do it anyway. It’s hard to resist the hilarity of Murdery McSwankiller Kai finding Stefan of all people suspicious. They’ll probably bond over cooking, though.

Hands down my favourite part is Damon’s panic attack, the way you wrote it – wow, so good. I have never had a panic attack and after reading that I was so glad that I hadn’t. It basically cracked open Damon’s life a little, let us in on his dark past. I have only waited 15 chapters for this (see every review of this fic I have ever written lol – god I’m so boring, sorry). When they were first trapped in the basement and Bonnie was quizzing him without mercy, I felt so bad for him.  I loved that she picked up on the panic attack and tried a softer approach and the connection that it sparked. I love their physical attraction (I want them to kiss every time they get within about 6 foot of each other, I have no idea how Bonnie copes!), their verbal sparring and Damon’s protectiveness towards Bonnie, but Damon being vulnerable and letting her in (even if he didn’t want to) was like the final piece in a jigsaw puzzle and at the same time, the beginning of something really beautiful. I really want to see more from him next chapter, his embarrassment is already palpable in the preview vid and I’m so psyched about vulnerable Damon. I hope we find out more about why he was in Chicago. Is that likely?

Ahhhhhh, girl, all of this has me so, so starry-eyed, like I’m so happy to hear this scene worked so well for you. I always get super nervous when I’m writing something sensitive that I’ve never gone through myself, and I try to do a bunch of research and read about peoples’ experiences and see what different accounts have in common to get to the core of it, but it’s still always a bit of a gamble. Not even in the sense of getting the symptoms and stuff right, because that’s just following a list, but more so capturing the gravity of it, not making it some melodramatic trivialized thing that robs it of weight, you know? That’s what I was the most worried about, so reading this review is just so, so wonderful, because it seems like you really felt everything I was trying to capture. Love love love your analysis of Bamon and their progression so far, and your note about how it felt like both the final piece of something and the beginning of something else. I think that’s such a great way to put it. You spend a fair bit of time in Damon’s head in 16, and it’s safe to say his whole breezy facade is cracked, but the vulnerability is definitely there. And as for the new beginning you mentioned in 15, I think what that ends up being in 16 is that trust is starting to build. He’s trying to avoid it at first, but it’s there and it’s growing, and in 17 (what was supposed to be 16, lmao), you’ll see the first moment where Damon actually volunteers information about himself. He isn’t asked, he isn’t panicking, he just finally gets to the point where he wants to talk about things, Chicago, etc. So I think it’s 100% likely that you’ll hear more about what happened there, and in an added bonus, it won’t all be from his mental narration! He’s going to bring it up. It’s comin’!

Edit: Having seen your posts, I have now seen that the next chapter will have Baroline friendship scenes and more Stefan back story – OMG yay so up for this! Also we need more about Stefan and the girl that cried after having sex with him (or was it the other way around?).

Hahaha literally BOTH of those things got lost in the split, I’m afraid. But they’re definitely coming! And lmaaaaaoooooo, in the fic, Stefan made a girl cry once, but I honestly wouldn’t put post-sex crying past him. Oh, Stefan, my precious emotional son.

Anyway, thanks so, so much for this glorious review, babe. As always, it was insightful and eloquent af and I’m crazy humbled to have readers like you. <3

[imaginemedreamingstuff]

Big Weekend || Dan Howell

A/N: this imagine was requested by @let-it-go-and-live-again! I really like the idea. yeeah body positivity!! btw I added an about me page to my bio in case you want to check it out!

Word Count: 1.6K

POV: Reader

MASTERLIST

The sky was cloudy but the air wasn’t too cold. Thousands of people were just hoping that it wouldn’t start raining. I was one of them. I stood there and hoped while my body was made of 60% pure adrenaline by now.

“I can’t wait for them to start!” I had to yell because the crowd of talking people was just so loud.

I smiled at Dan whole heartedly. The huge grin on my face was so big that my cheeks hurt.

“You are cute when you are that excited.” Dan laughed and took my hand in his.

His dimples were showing and just the sight of him made me feel like my heart was going to burst. Although Dan and Phil had stopped doing their radio shows they were still asked to do some interviews at Radio 1’s Big Weekend, an annual music festival.

Dan surprised me by inviting me to come with him. I obviously had to say yes, especially since my favourite band was performing. They were going to enter the stage soon and thousands of excited fans including me and Dan were impatiently waiting for them.

Although Dan was allowed to watch from back stage we decided to mix into the crowd because there was so much audience participation during the band’s concerts.

For a second the crowd grew all silent, then the first fans started screaming. Welcomed by loud cheers and squeals my favourite band ran onto stage. They immediately started with their first song. The air was filled with bursting energy and excitement. I hadn’t felt so alive in a long time.

I started singing my heart out to the songs I had listened to a million times before, but they sounded and felt so different live. When the whole crowd started chanting the chorus of my all time favourite song I jumped up and down, not being able to stop myself from moving and dancing.

“You are damn beautiful, Y/N!” I heard Dan shout into my ear.

I only now realized that he was watching me the whole time and blushed a little bit.

As one of the band’s slow songs sounded from the speakers Dan wrapped his arms around me from behind and we swayed to the music. His broad chest was pressed against my back and he rested his chin on top of my head, kissing my hair now and then.

After the ballade ended I got on my tip toes again in order to be able to watch my favourite band member’s every move.

“Do you know how lucky you are, Dan?” I asked him laughing, pointing out the height difference between us.

Dan was by far one of the tallest people in the crowd and I looked tiny next to him.

“You could sit on my shoulders.” Dan suggested with a wink.

“Dan, everyone behind us would hate us.” I laughed but had to admit that I kinda liked the idea.

“Enter the world of us giants. Just one song.” He pleaded with puppy dog eyes.

I had to admit it sounded tempting. Very tempting actually.

“Okay, but if people start shouting at us it’s all your fault!” I gave in and Dan didn’t really have much convincing to do.

He bent down so I could sit on his shoulders. After I had gotten on top of him I was able to overlook the whole crowd. His head was in between my thighs and I couldn’t stop myself from running my fingers through his soft chocolate brown hair. I crossed my legs behind Dan’s back and he held my thighs for extra stabilization.

Dan and I were enjoying ourselves and I was so happy to have an amazing boyfriend like him.

Just as the song ended and Dan was about to set me down, we were stopped by the band’s drummer and my favourite member.

“Listen everybody! Do you see this pretty girl who got on top of somebody’s shoulders? I want you all to do the same!” he shouted into his microphone and pointed right at me. The crowd started cheering and moving around.

Everybody who was here with somebody followed his instructions. I, on the other hand, had an immensely hard time processing the fact that my favourite band member had just called me pretty!

The heat rushed to my face and my hands started shaking. I felt like my 16-year-old fangirling self again.  

“O my god he called me pretty!” I squealed once my feet touched the ground again.

“Because you are!” Dan said with twinkling eyes and made me smile even wider.

I pecked his lips quickly before I faced the stage again. Just as my eyes landed on the drummer again he took off his shirt, revealing his toned chest and perfectly defined abs. The whole female part of the crowd completely lost it. Never before had I heard such high-pitched screams.

A few teenage girls actually looked like they were about to faint. I had to stare at him in awe. I squealed along while he smashed his drums, sweat dripping down his forehead.  

“Damn I forgot how hot he is.” I breathed in disbelief and was too busy to notice the look on Dan’s face as those words left my mouth.

I was still jumping up and down like a bouncy ball after the concert had ended. Dan was guiding me backstage with him because I was too busy talking about the concert to concentrate on where I was going.  

“I can’t believe that just happened. Best concert ever!” I babbled ecstatically.

“Mhm” Dan mumbled quietly and I was again too excited to notice his resentment.

Back in the hotel we were staying in for the weekend I had calmed down a bit again. After changing out of my sweaty shirt and drinking what seemed like 4 bottles of water I was back to normal.

Since Dan and I were extremely exhausted we decided to go straight to bed. It was only Saturday so we still had the whole of Sunday ahead of us. When I was done with brushing my teeth and exited the bathroom I noticed that Dan was in bed already. I got under his duvet as well and was immediately greeted by his comforting body warmth.

I snuggled up next to him and rested my head on his chest.

“Thank you for taking me with you. I really enjoyed today.” I whispered softly and pecked his pink lips.

With a grin, I decided to deepen the kiss and quickly straddled my surprised boyfriend.

“I thought you said you were tired.” Dan asked raising a brow, teasingly.

“I am never too tired for this.” I breathed seductively.

As soon as those words had come over my lips Dan immediately flipped us over so he was on top. I ran my hands up and down his chest, taking his t-shirt off soon after. He connected our lips again, we didn’t start out slow, it was heated since minute one. The tiredness from before was gone as Dan moved his hips against mine. I couldn’t hold in a silent moan.

“Am I hurting you?” Dan asked suddenly sounding insecure.

I broke the kiss to look at him in confusion. Did he misinterpret my moan?

“Why would you be hurting me? We haven’t even.. you know.“ I asked him confused, looking up at him.

“I thought I crushed you under my weight..” Dan’s words were barely a whisper. He swallowed hard as has face turned the colour of a tomato.

My eyes widened in shock and disbelief.

“Daaann-“ I trailed, waiting for him to tell me he was joking, but he didn’t.

“What are you talking about, Dan?” I wanted to know, scared of his answer.

He got off me and let himself fall down on the bed next to me. I lifted myself up on my elbow to be able to look into his dark brown eyes.

“I- I’m just really heavy. I don’t wanna hurt you.” He explained and I could tell that he was uncomfortable.

��You are way over 6 feet, Dan. How are you supposed to not be heavy?” I argued.

“Yeah sure.” He mumbled unmotivated. My face fell, finally getting what he was implying.

“That’s not what you meant, right?” I breathed totally aghast.

“No.” He whispered and slowly shook his head.

“Why do you suddenly feel like that? You are so beautiful, baby.” I gently traced his biceps, taking in his beauty.

He seemed to quietly ponder for a while before he decided to voice his thoughts.

“I just, I don’t have abs or a toned chest and I’m not that fit and-“ he made himself stop in the middle of his sentence.

He grew all silent. His words brought tears to my eyes. Why didn’t he see how perfect he was?

“You are not saying this because I called that stupid drummer hot today, right?” I tried, but the look on his face at the mention of what I had said earlier totally gave him away.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would make you feel that way. Listen I don’t care if he is hot or not. He will never be you and I love every tiny bit of your body and your soul.” I whispered softly, meaning every word I said.  

I cupped Dan’s face with my hands and deeply looked into his eyes. “You are perfect the way you are and I love you more than anything.” I slowly said so he could take in every single word.

Dan blushed and I noticed that a small smile had found its way back onto his face.

“It’s not just about having a fit body, you know that. Now c’mon let me show you how beautiful you are.” I breathed and started leaving kisses all over his chest and neck, straddling him again.