#sorry ive been AWOL (again)
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#not dead#sorry ive been AWOL (again)#i swear it's not you it's me#and im sorry i let piles and piles of messages stack up here in the DMs and not answer them#i would say im not purposefully ignoring you all but it sounds like a lie. im just. an absolute bloody arse sometimes#i have not been up for social things lately and have been feeling otherwise drained#things are currently a bit messy irl but i swear there is nothing to worry about as i am slowly getting things sorted#im just. really really bad at sorting things out. and this is messing me up a bit#still boggles me how so many things could happen within the span of like... 3 days#but anyway. i know i demand a lot of patience from all of you but im gonna really need you guys to be patient a little longer 😅#again. so sorry. i promise to answer messages and catch up with you lovelies soon once everything is cleared up#(or at least once my head is)#still love you darlings <3#to clarify again. the problem is me. not you
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hey y'all, i know ive been awol for a long time and unfortunately things have piled up like shit once again even though i thoguht it would start reducing. so i'll mostly be on hiatus till jun 22nd... i really miss talking to everyone and im really sorry abt this TT but yeah by then ill (hopefully) have lotsof simp notes ch ready to be uploaded and done with most of reqs of the 1k event.
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SOUP!! HI ITS ME 🦦 AGAIN!!
sorry i’ve been AWOL, life’s been a bit chaotic and i haven’t had time to sit down and fangoirl the way i normally do!! i’ve still been keeping up w every single one of the things you post tho, even if i haven’t been commenting!!! your writing is still my all time fav OFC and RAH i appreciate you and your stories sm <3
i don’t remember what’s the last thing i commented on but AHHHH ive loved so many of the most recent ones!! vince’s flu on wen’s bday!! the bromance, the way luke took care of him!!!! jon and leo’s engagement!!!!! so fucking cute and exciting sob!!! jon taking care of angie filled my heart w joy 😭 the jon and leo food poisoning one was also TOP TIER and omfg the fic abt vin overeating did THINGS to me 🤭🤭
totally off topic but i’m so sorry to hear abt your health scare!! sending the best vibes and hoping everything works out for the best! manifesting health!!!!
also, very random but i wanna know if i’m crazy and just reading into things? is it just me or have you been hinting at wen’s ED kinda being back? like ofc not full force but i feel like there’s been little things here and there that kinda point to that and if this is the case,, gosh you know i’m one of the biggest angst enjoyers so i would love for you to explore it a bit more if that’s something you’re comfortable with!! (and i also think it’s good timing bc it would make sense for it to get bad again at this point in her life with everything that’s been going on)
anyways i’m excited to see what’s next for everyone!! i’m probs gonna send one or two different asks w some requests hehehe 🤭
THANKS FOR EVERYTHING YOU DO!!
KEEP SLAYING!!!
🦦
🦦!! Hi babe!! So glad to hear from you, I was missing you! How's life been treating you?
Tysm for the well wishes, I'm keeping all my fingers crossed!
About Wendyyyy.... Not really, no! Full disclosure, there was a plan to have Wendy relapse, but that was when I thought Vince and her would stay broken up! Instead, they got back together and are going more strong than ever, so that also fell out of the window!
I think what you might be reading on Wendy is that I've brought up her ED a couple times, mostly because I'm writing her getting more and more close with the gang (in particular Bella), so I imagine she'd open up more too.
I got a request a billion months ago that asked for Wendy to be sick and Vince to overthink and assume its her relapsing and I'm very in love with that ask still. I think it fits their current storyline, since he's away and Wendy IS very happy atm so I don't see her genuinely relapsing, and I'm gonna write it, I just gotta write a couple other things first 🙈
There was also a request for Wendy to have a migraine (long time since she had one!) and Max be the caretaker, with Vince being very protective of her once he gets there! SO no ED relapse, but there are some Wendy stories in the makings 💛
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9 People You’d Like to Know More
Tagged by @shouldiusemyname and @recentadultburnout
Last song: Kenji Kawai - Utai IV Reawakening (Steve Aoki Remix), because I was watching this Street Dance of China performance:
youtube
Currently reading: I'm working my way through a thing I'm translating for a job, if that counts as reading? If we're just talking reading for pleasure: I just finished Yellowfever by R.F. Kuang and highly, highly recommend it. Content warnings out the wazoo (the narrator is an AWFUL person who doesn't come anywhere near realising how bad she is); I still couldn't put it down until I was finished. Next up is probably a few chapters of Queer Transfigurations and a whole lot of fanfic until Shelley Parker-Chan's He Who Drowned The World is released on the 24th.
Currently watching: Laws of Attraction, Be My Favorite, Tokyo in April is …, Not Me (re-watch for class purposes), SOTUS, Good Omens S2, and technically also 10 Years Ticket but I'm stalled on it
Next in line on my watchlist: I don't have a watch list as such, but I'd like to finish one of the shows I started but stalled on – other than 10 Years Ticket, maybe The Warp Effect?
Starting soon: Only Friends
Current obsession: gonna take a page out of @shouldiusemyname's book and try to narrow it down to just three:
in concrete fannish/fandom things, this is still Bad Buddy. I've watched and enjoyed other shows, but I keep coming back – to read fic, to analyse and speculate with friends and strangers, sometimes to write … and sometimes I go back and work through an episode or two in relation to 2.) or 3.).
slightly removed, there's Thai language and everything it connects to– I've dropped the ball on it a little for brickspace reasons, but I want to get back into it. Right now, the extent of my Thai practice is watching LoA without subs every week, preparing for and attending a class focussed around Not Me, and one 1-on-1 conversation class that's technically weekly but teacher and I have both been having life things happen, so it's not really been weekly for a while now. I wish I had the brainspace to challenge myself more, especially to speak. Feels hard to believe I had the spoons to do language exchange stuff daily and have regular convo classes for a while (u_u) I miss it.
and going into a slightly different direction again, BL academia/scholarship – I was fairly interested in this even back in university, but unfortunately it wasn't something I could pursue with the professors I had at the time, so I had to content myself with the classes and papers on gender studies, queer studies, and Japanese pop culture of the 20th century I could get, and reading whatever papers about BL "proper" I could get my hands on in my spare time. I'm glad to be getting back into it now, if a bit wistful.
I have no idea who has and hasn't done this because I've been pretty awol from tumblr for a while, but as an attempt: @dimplesandfierceeyes, @ephemeral-hiraeth, @fanonplussed, @galauvant, @isaksbestpillow, @liyazaki, @loveongsa, @plantsarepeopletoo, and @sixohsixoheightfourtwo, (if you already did this and I missed it, I'm sorry and will be happy for a pointer that way!) Obviously no pressure to do this at all :D
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i would like to apologize for the sheer amount of your hellsing posts i'm reblogging but i just got into it and my god you get like. the UTTER JOYS of this show so well. ty for ur service o7
hey sorry im late to responding to my inbox, ive been a bit awol from the hellsing fandom but getting asks like this brightens my day!
if you ever want to hit up my inbox again i always have thoughts on it and i always enjoy a good hellsing discussion :) it's still my special interest for sure, perhaps i will draw/write something for it soon (shameless plug that i write fic lol)
thanks so much for the ask! <3
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one day i will open sims again......one day
#again im SO sorry ive been so AWOL#my brain only has two modes right now: job mode and daydreaming about moving in w my partner next year#i dont have enough braincells for anything else#tex talk#saviorhide#nonsims
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#god im really so sorry ive been absent guys#i just...#am not in a good state#currently#long story short i feel disgusting lmao#its not a constant thing but#my mood is dipping and crashing drastically from the highs#im having a bit of trouble dealing with it#in all honesty feel a bit hopeless#i have 72 asks in my inbox and it just sort of#adds to the frustration i have with myself rn#im so sorry#i keep saying ill try harder and be better but#i keep ending up here#im sorry :(#im trying to work up the motivation to come on here and interact but it just#feel so absolutely rubbish#i haven't felt this bad since last year around this time#i feel bad even saying this but i wanted to be a little upfront about why im#yet again awol#sigh#i hope youre all doing much better than i am#❤️💕#love you#ill delete this later
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DUMB!FICATION! ⌇BTS REACTIONS ࿐
— PROMPT: bts members reaction to you going dumb during sex
— PAIRING: members x f!reader
— GENRE: smut. 18+ minors dni.
— WARNINGS: um.. dumb!fication! teasing, joon being kinda mean :,(, size kink <3 unprotected sex, soft!dom jin, mean!dom yoongi, slight exhibitionism, heavy degradation, edging (?), super soft!dom hobi <3 (im shocked), fingering, praise, jimin and tae r both feral, overstimulation, oral f!receiving, multiple cream🥧s, SOFT!DOM KOO <3
— A.NOTE: HI i know i’ve been AWOL, but im here & i come bearing gifts <3 happy october!! p.s. im not sure if this classifies as reactions but enjoy nonetheless (jk’s is so long hes been bias wrecking me im sorry) p.s.s. ive posted this 5 times so hopefully it shows up this time
KIM NAMJOON ࿐
you had been unnecessarily needy for namjoon’s attention throughout the entire day. you truly couldn’t help yourself with how big and handsome he looked even while doing the tiniest tasks. he’d had enough, though, when you decided to straddle him at the end of the day while he was reading his book. slightly irritated that he was now hard, he put you to work, claiming if you want something, you gotta do it yourself.
“needy fuckin’ girl,” he mutters, laying back against the plush pillows as his hands gripped tightly onto your waist. they guide you on grinding against his pelvis with his cock stirring up your insides. “baby wanted to be split open all day long and now she can’t even do it herself can she?” he pouts, feigning faux sympathy.
his condescending words go through one of your ears and straight out the other. “please, please, please!” you beg, hiccuping slightly as his cock rubs right against your g-spot.
“what are you beggin’ for, baby, hmm?” he asks, curiously. “you already have my cock stuffed in you, what more could you possibly want?”
you choke on your words as your mind numbs, “j-joon!”
“awww,” he coos, finally comprehending the situation. “pretty baby’s gone dumb just by sitting on my cock, yeah?” he says with a smirk, bucking his hips into you.
mindlessly, you nod with fervor crying out his name again with a mantra of pleads. “hah! ye-yeah, fuck! joon, please!”
he shakes his head, biting back a smile. he feels himself throbbing inside of you merely because of how sexy you look in this fucked out state. “tell me what you want, angel, i know you can do that for me,”
his voice is so deep that you swear you can feel it vibrating your entire body, yet you manage to find the words to tell him what you so desperately need. “w-wan’na cum,”
he smiles, humming softly, “so fuckin’ cute,” he mutters under his breath. “gonna make sure my baby cums, don’t you worry.”
KIM SEOKJIN ࿐
it’s an accident, truly. usually after work, seokjin is on his knees for you– eating you out, fucking you with three fingers, making you cum and gush all over his face. but today was different. today jin was frustrated and stressed and genuinely annoyed with how his day went. being the amazing girlfriend you are, you offered to please him today– to let him have his way with you. little did you know, he was a little more pent-up than you had assumed.
“princess, fuck,” he moans, fucking his hard cock into your cunt. “feels so good, you always feel so good around me.” he practically says through grit teeth.
he stands over your quivering body with a bruising clasp on your hips. his thrusts are quick, hard, and shallow; nonetheless, he’s hitting every spot he needs to. you’ve already cum twice, but you want to give it all to him with the day he’s had.
you feel dizzy, mind buzzing with infinite pleasure as he unravels the knot again and again.“hngh,” you moan, words garbled as you can’t seem to form any. “fuh– fuuuck!” you sob starting to feel overstimulated, hands gripping for life on his forearms.
his speed falters, snapping out of his state of frustration. “princess?” he questions, furrowing his brows in confusion.
you whine when he stops altogether, “jiiin!” you cry for him, back arching to get him to resume. “n-more, mph, need more!” you slur, incoherent noises slipping past your lips.
he must not have realized that he fucked you beyond limits and is starting to feel bad that he took his frustration out on you. he attempts to retract himself from your body, but you wrap your legs around him tightly, keeping him inside of you.
you muster all the words your spinning head will allow, “need your c-cock, jin, please,”
he looks into your pleading eyes and his guilt melts away. his speed picks up and is keen on the way you squeal, getting lost in the way he fucks you once more. you attempt to tell him to never stop, but the words die on your tongue and seokjin can’t help but smile at your dumb state.
“shhh, just take it, baby, i got you,” he whispers. “leave all the thinking to me.”
MIN YOONGI ࿐
you love yoongi, you do. truly! but it’s hard to provoke him with his undying patience and cool, cat-like demeanor that made him seem emotionless. it’s hard to get him to fuck you like an animal the way you so desperately need. that’s not to say it never happens. even though it’s hard to evoke a reaction, it’s not impossible. nights like tonight where you’re flirting with every moving thing in the bar. nights like tonight where you’re not wearing underwear and making sure yoongi knows. nights like tonight where you’re bent over the bar’s dirty bathroom sink with his hand laced into your hair as he's pounding into you just the way you hoped he would.
“look at you,” he grunts, pulling your hair roughly to look into the cloudy mirror. you look at your face, watery mascara streaks staining your face and your lipstick smudged all around your mouth. “fucking slut,” he scoffs.
you moan in agreement, his cock dragging against your sweet spot. replying to him is the last thing on your mind. with the way he’s fucking you, the only thing you can think about is his dick and getting off on his rough behavior.
“think it’s cute to throw yourself around? to look so fucking desperate?” he grits through his teeth as his thrusts punctuate every word. “you just wanted my attention, isn’t that right?”
you nod your head, hoping the high-pitched moans and your incessant movements answer his question because god knows you can’t say anything.
he chuckles breathily, “yeah? acting like a slut so i can fuck you like this?”
you clench around him tightly at his words and he takes that as his answer, snapping his hips into you with more vigor. you moan loudly, more tears running down your cheeks.
“all you had to do was ask, baby,” he mutters, feeling himself throb inside you at the sound of your pretty voice. even with the loud thumping of the music outside, he still basks in the lewd noises of your sloppy cunt and your cries. “no, but you’re too cockdrunk now to say thank you, huh?”
“th-thank yo– yoongi!” your apology is cut short by the scream of his name. his cock consistently ramming into your body’s most sensitive spot and you can’t hold back anymore. “cumming!” you cry.
he hums, stopping his movements and you cry out in protest again, “did i fuck you so stupid you forgot the rules? bad girls don’t get to cum, sweetheart.”
JUNG HOSEOK ࿐
it’s safe to say that every time you get sexual with hoseok, you go absolutely stupid forgetting everything except his name and the feeling of his mouth or hands or his perfect cock. today was no different, yet he’d come at you with a much different approach. his usual degradation and harsh movements were replaced with the sweetest praise and merciful touch.
“you’ve been such a good girl for me lately, doll,” he whispers into your ear, gently pressing soft pecks around the area which is a stark contrast to what his fingers were doing. he has you in between his legs and your back pressed to his chest with your legs wide open while he fucks three of his big fingers into your soaked cunt. “haven’t been too rough, have i?”
you shake your head, “no, no! love when you’re rough!” your words come out pleadingly. you feel so full just with his fingers that it’s almost mind-numbing.
he chuckles, the pad of his thumb moving to lazily rub circles into your clit simultaneously. you gasp, twitching in his arms and clamping around his fingers. “you’re so fuckin’ pretty, baby,” he mumbles, starting to trail his pecks down your neck. “so pretty ‘n good… all f’me.”
the praise goes straight to your core and makes your brain go haywire. praise isn’t a foreign concept from hobi, it’s more that you weren’t expecting that.
“mph, y-yeah, hoseok, all yours,” you whine breathily, throwing your head back on his shoulder providing more access to your neck. you can’t help but let your brain turn to mush at his words and actions. mindlessly, you clamp around his fingers as you attempt to fuck his hand.
“yeah? you love being my cute lil fucktoy?” he questions gently before noticing the way your body starts withering under his touch. his breath tickles the skin on your neck making you hypersensitive. “gonna cum, baby?”
“hnggh, baby…” you whimper, eyes rolling to the back of your head.
hobi lets out a soft laugh, “don’t tell me you’ve already gone dumb on me, dollface.” he jokes, but it makes his cock twitch knowing that even the slight touch of his fingers has your brain going haywire. when you moan in reply, he simply hums, “that’s alright, pretty, just cum for me, yeah?”
PARK JIMIN ࿐
jimin is crazy about you. insane, if you will. he likes to show you that by shoving his head between your thighs and devouring you till you’re a puddle of mush all for him. he eats you out like he hasn’t eaten in weeks like you’re the last thing he’ll get a taste of. it’s mostly because he loves the way you taste, but he can’t deny how much he loves the way you babble dumbly for his cock in this state. it’s kind of sadistic, but you never complain. not even when you’re overstimulated and reduced to choked sobs and quivering limbs.
“minnie!” you cry, hands laced into his hair as you pull on his roots. he groans into your pussy, eliciting another high-pitched whine from you. “f-fuck, baby! i-i can’t!”
he’s been in between your legs for at least half an hour now, ripping orgasms from your poor body left and right and you both know that you’re close to tapping out mentally, but you know in your bones that’s what he wants that to happen.
“come on, angel, for me?” he moans, hands squeezing the flesh of your plush, trembling thighs. “please cum for me, tastes so fucking good,” he begs and you can’t resist his pleading voice or pretty moans…
so you do. you cum. hard. you cum with your back arched and both of your hands carded through his silky hair as you push him further into your wet core. you cum grinding against his face to ride out your orgasm as your body is wracked with sobs and gasps. you cum so hard you swear you’ve completely left earth, but jimin’s voice brings you back down.
“baby, shhh,” he shushes, hands rubbing your thighs gently in an attempt to stop them from shaking uncontrollably. “are you alright?”
you moan breathily at his question as you nod your head, your brain genuinely unable to provide a verbal answer for him. you make grabby hands at him and he knows exactly what it means having done this more times than he can count. he leans in pressing his lips to yours, swallowing all of your tiny whimpers and letting you taste yourself on his tongue.
“wan’ your cock,” you mumble against his lips after a few minutes.
he smiles widely knowing he has you right where he wants you.
KIM TAEHYUNG ࿐
taehyung has a knack for fucking you until you can’t even remember your own name. he loves your tears, your pretty cries, your begs where he can’t tell what you’re asking for– he loves it all. but what he doesn’t realize is that he gets just as dumb as you. he rambles on and on about you and how much he loves your cunt while fucking his previous loads into you with his sensitive cock.
“taehyung!” you sob, your fingernails digging into his broad shoulders, sure to leave a mark. your drenched, your body covered with a sheen layer of sweat, tears slipping down your face, pussy overflowing with your mixed cum– but this is how taehyung likes it. he loves it messy.
“pussy’s so fuckin’ good– fuck! you’re such a good fuckin’ girl takin’ all of my cock,” he moans, eyes threatening to roll back as he’s overcome with intense pleasure. his cock fucks you open, cum seeping out of your worn pussy every time he pulls out.
you can’t stop the tears from falling down your face. you’ve lost track of how many times you cum around him, but you could care less. you feel so good even with how sensitive you are. he’s making you feel so fucking good, and hearing that you’re doing the same for him has your head spinning even more.
you clench around him and he whines your name out. “b-baby, how are you still so fuckin’ tight?” his voice wavers, and you clench around him again. “fuck, ‘m gonna cum again. gonna fill you up even more, pretty girl, you want that?”
when you don’t reply, taehyung’s thumb finds your clit, rubbing harsh circles into the swollen bud. you gasp loudly, “tae! shit, fuck, i-i-”
“i asked if my good girl wanted my cum?” he pants, giving you deeper thrusts, sensitive tip rubbing against your velvet walls making him shake.
“i do! i do!” you plead nearly choking on a sob as you feel the tight rope in the pit of your stomach snap, soaking him with your cum.
that’s all it takes for taehyung, going still once he’s pressed himself deep inside of you. he twitches once, twice and after the third time, you feel the warmth of his load filling you to the brim, dressing your used walls in your favorite shade of white.
“fuck, i love you,” he says before collapsing next to you.
JEON JUNGKOOK ࿐
jungkook hates to see you so sad. so dejected, unable to even look him in the eye. you don’t deserve that, you don’t deserve to feel so shitty. he knows work is hard for you some days and he knows you hate your boss and your pretentious coworkers, he just doesn’t know why you put up with it.
“baby, talk to me, please?” he pleads as you lay on the bed at the end of the night with your back facing him. “what happened, angel? did someone say something to you again?”
you shrug, mumbling out, “‘m just tired of thinkin’ about it, koo, can we just drop it and go to bed?”
jungkook sighs, placing a hand on your arm, shaking you gently to turn and look at him, “look at me,” he whispers and when you finally do with a pout on your face, he smiles. “there she is, my pretty girl.”
a blush creeps up your neck and face and your stomach churns at his soft words. “koo, stop…”
“i wanna help you, Y/N,” he whispers, leaning into you. “lemme help you forget today, yeah? wanna make you feel so good that you forget, can i do that?”
you want to cry, nodding your head and taking a deep breath.
he kisses you gently, taking his time with you before letting his pace pick up. soon you find yourself aching underneath him, thighs sticking together with your arousal and head whirling with need.
as he pushes himself inside of you, rocking in and out of you, you feel all your worries leave your body. tears sting your eyes before you ultimately decide to close them and turn off your brain to bask in the pleasure your sweet boyfriend is giving you.
you moan his name out softly and he groans back, “such a pretty little thing,” he mumbles, pushing his head in the crook of your neck. he places wet kisses on the sensitive skin.
“koo… fuck…” you whimper, eyes rolling back as he’s fucking you as deep as he can go. “f-fuck, feels… feels s-so… good,” you all but slur, taking the near incoherency of your words as a sign to shut up before you begin to babble nonsense.
“don’t know why you work so hard, gorgeous,” he whispers into your ear, continuing to fuck you nice and deep. “wanna take care of you forever, don’t wanna see you sad like this,” his voice wavers with his words when you clamp tightly around him at the mention of ‘forever.’
he smiles against your neck, leaving a feathery kiss before reminding you, “you don’t have to think about them anymore, angel, ‘m here, alright? gonna make you feel so fucking good n’ have you cum till you don’t remember those assholes.”
© cheolhub — all rights reserved, please refrain from copying, reposting, modifying or translating my work on any platform.
#bts smut#bts x reader#namjoon smut#bts headcanons#bts reaction#bts reactions#namjoon x reader#seokjin x reader#seokjin smut#yoongi x reader#yoongi smut#hoseok x reader#hoseok smut#hobi x reader#hobi smut#jimin x reader#jimin smut#taehyung x reader#taehyung smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut
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Group Ask 193
What is a group ask?
Previous Group Asks
AO3 Search Tutorial
Please reply to this post if you know one of the fics mentioned in this ask. Thank you so much in advance!
Anonymous 1 asked:
Hi! I was hoping you could help me find a fic. Post WS, I remember at one point Nick sneaks on Bucky in a dinner I think, and tells him that he has this group of superheroes but they are a bit at loss because their leader is a mess because he's so worried about Bucky and if Bucky will join the avengers so Steve can be functional again. I think it's not the first time Shield tried to recruit Bucky and Phil had tried first. Thank you!
Anonymous 2 asked:
hi, ive been looking everywhere for this one nsfw fic i read like a year ago lmao, basically it was like a slice of life type thing where steve came out of the shower and then bucky rimmed him and they broke the headboard? thats all i can really remember, thanks❤️
Anonymous 3 asked:
i’m looking for a war-era fic where peggy and howard don't drop steve in austria, he just goes AWOL without telling anyone, walks to austria, and then turns up like a week later with bucky and 400 POWs. i've had a look in the tags but would appreciate your help :)
sissi2d asked:
Does anyone know the title of a Stucky fic where Steve is in the kitchen singing “Superstar” (by The Carpenters) probably doing supper and Bucky arrives to their apartment and starts singing along? I’m not sure if it was pre war ... it was definitely AU...
Anonymous 4 asked:
Hi! I can't find a fic I read on AO3 some times ago, I hoped you could help me! It's some kind of modern setting AU: Steve comes home from the hospital after almost dying and has to stay at home to get better; Bucky stays with him and accepts money from his parents to be able to afford more days off of wok to stay with Steve, who gets really angry when he realizes it. He's really not coping well with everything going on. They get into a fight and then Steve realizes he's been awful to Bucky... I've already tried the sick Steve search and any other search parameter I could think of.
doctorenterprise asked:
I read a fic ages ago where Bucky’s arm was damaged badly and he retreated in on himself, making Steve think he was in incredible pain. What was actually happening is that the wires were short circuiting and causing him to orgasm painfully every time he touched the wires to try fixing the problem. Eventually he allowed Steve to help him with it and the experience was fraught with sexual tension and angst. Cannot for the life of me find it on AO3. Any thoughts?
dottytigger asked:
hi!!! firstly thank you for everything you do!!! you guys are such legends omg!!! i am looking for a fic i read a loooong time ago where steve and bucky are living together and steve is careful of not touching bucky/doesnt touch him too much and then one day bucky approaches steve and steve asks what he needs/what's wrong and i think he just figures out that bucky wants to be touched/hugged ?? and from then on it is touchy-feely central!! sorry it's not super specific but thank you in advance <3
Anonymous 5 asked:
Hi! I was looking for a fic that I read years ago, it was about Bucky and he would go to a diner/restaurant (?) like daily and order food and he would have to separate it out into like the separate items and eat them one at a time. I really don't remember much of the fic at all cause I read it probably like 4 or 5 years back but I just remembered it out of the blue. If anybody knows what it is, I would love to know! 🥰❤️
Anonymous 6 asked:
Hi, I’m looking for this fic I read a while ago and I can’t find it anywhere. It was a/b/o with omega Steve and alpha Bucky where hydra kidnapped him and gave him to Bucky. Bucky was the winter soldier and I think they were true mates. Then I think the avengers explode the base and they get out (but not with the avengers) and go to a safe house. I also remember that Steve was in a heat but it was forced upon home by hydra and Bucky was in rut. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks
zakharovasmarguerite asked:
Hey! I’ve been looking for a semi-au mini series (it had three chapters) where Steve was rescued from the ice by an expedition team led by Bucky. The name should be an Arctic Monkeys song, but I’m not sure. Thanks!
whitewolfwintersoldier asked:
do you know the fic where steve is badly injured (maybe an assassination attempt? explosion? his injuries are bad enough that i'm pretty sure he's covered in bandages but i could be wrong) and shield agent bucky has watch over him while he recovers
Anonymous 7 asked:
Hey! So there was this fic I read a while ago, it was post cw/ws but was then canon divergent. I remember it being quite long and it was mainly about Bucky and Sam, Sam figured out that Bucky loves Steve and he tries to deny it etc. They met up with Steve at the end after fighting Tony and driving all across the country. Sorry if this is really vague lol but do you know this fic?
Anonymous 8 asked:
i need help!!! i’m looking for a fic where bucky was essentially homeless and lived under a bridge? and there was a cat!!! and steve was like... all hunky dory, and ran into bucky who’s works at a fruit and vege, and broke his ankle??? he normally rides a bike to work!!! i want to reread it again SO bad
Anonymous 9 asked:
I’ve been looking for this fic where Steve and Bucky met as teenagers when Bucky was smoking on a swing set and Steve sat with him. Bucky joined the military and they lost touch and reconnected as adults when they saw each other at a bar. Bucky had an abusive Dad that passed away when he was in high school. When Steve and Bucky start hanging out again they make tacos for dinner and Natasha is Bucky’s roommate. I hope these details help you find it I would really appreciate it!
Anonymous 10 asked:
Hi, I was wondering if you could help me find a fix I’ve lost. It’s kind of like a farm au, though really it’s more of a really small town au. Basically what I remember is Bucky has to go there for some reason, and Steve lives there with his mom. I do t remember a lot of the plot, though I do remember that Steve wore suspenders, which Bucky had a weird fascination with. I don’t remember the rating though I do know there are some more smutty drabbles set in that universe. I read it on Ao3. Thanks
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Stitches (Part Two)
Ya’ll, I wasn’t planning on posting this yet but when I actually checked, I realised that if I didn’t- Part Two was going to be over 12,000 words. So I had to split it again. So, you can look forward to a Part Three! I also, sort of, accidentally maybe, wrote a teeny tiny lil’ bit of plot.
Tagged: @kittygonyan @mrsreina (If you’d like to be tagged in Part Three, give me a shout!)
Pairing: Villain!AllMight x Reader
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Blood, Swearing, Threats of Non-Con (Not made by our boy All Might and not said explicitly though).
Word Count: 6800+
Summary: A phone call makes you question just how the biggest bad in Japan feels about you. You discover just how All Might was injured and things get just a lil’ bit steamy.
---------------------
He was gone for over half an hour and you’d spent that time preparing the dressings you’d need for him. The wound was in a semi awkward place- just below the dip of his collarbone, so you’d had to dig out the gauze tape.
All the while, you attempted to calm the rapid, dizzying beat of your heart.
Those damn breathing exercises that Ivy had taught you were doing jack shit, especially with the feeling of his hands still imprinted firmly on your hips.
Were you really going to do this tonight?
It wasn’t as though you hadn’t danced around him for months now, the unyielding pull of his orbit spinning you closer and closer until the inevitable collision. But as you stood on the precipice, feet towing the line and looking into the abyss… there was still some trepidation.
Was he just doing this to prove that he could get into your pants?
Where the hell would it even go? He was, at his core, a villain and nothing you could do or say would ever change his nature.
Not that you would want to. You weren’t here to ‘fix’ him in any other way but physically.
Yet, despite all of the reservations that swam in your head, you couldn’t deny the chemistry that had always bubbled between you. Especially in those moments that you forgot just who he was and he was just idling around your apartment with you. Those moments made you just as hot as when you saw him pummelling some wannabe hero on TV.
Making him coffee while he fixed your kitchen sink. Actually… finding out that he could fix a kitchen sink had been jarring enough. Bickering over which movie to watch, when you knew he was going to win like he always did- but arguing with him for the fun of it anyway.
That day you’d found out that he did a fucking wicked impression of Endeavor and you’d howled with laughter- then caught him looking immensely proud of himself afterwards.
Even now, the memory of it made your lips quirk in a stupid smile.
Seeing that side of him made it so easy to separate him from the man the rest of the world saw. They weren’t privy to all the things that made him unique. Would it really be so wrong of you to give in?
The filthy promise he’d made still rang in your ears.
Slow, hard and all night long. Your thighs clenched in anticipation.
Your phone buzzed cheerily on the side table and the coffee you’d made for yourself in his absence sloshed against the side of the mug when you jumped.
An unknown number usually meant one of two things. Either All Might was calling you to ask how to perform some horrible mutilation on a person without them losing too much blood- or Ivy was calling for a chat.
Since the former was currently using up all of your hot water- seriously, thirty five minutes now- you correctly guessed that it was the latter. You answered, immediately perking up at the sound of her voice.
“Babes, is that beefy idiot of yours there? His little henchmen have been tearing apart half of the city trying to find him,” she said, not even bothering with hello. You tutted. Of course he’d just up and vanished without giving anyone a hint that he was okay.
“Hi Ivy,” you said pointedly and you could almost hear her roll her eyes at your insistence of politeness. “Yeah, he’s here.”
She grumbled.
“Ugh, will you please tell him to call off his goons before I have to kill any more of them for disrespecting me,” she said, like murdering henchmen was all too taxing for her. You knew differently. She was probably enjoying the change of pace. You half smiled, shaking your head.
What exactly was your life? Passing messages between villains like some kind of sentient answering machine.
“Hold on. He’s in the shower,” you said, escaping the soft light of the living room and heading in the direction of the still -goddamn it- running water. His clothes were piled where you’d told him to leave them and you were oddly touched to find that he’d arranged them in a way that the bloodied parts weren’t on your carpet.
He could be considerate when he wanted to be.
Biting your lip, you eventually worked up the courage and knocked on the door. You knew that he was grinning from ear to ear, probably expecting you to barge in and simply toss your panties over your shoulder while you were at it.
Hmm. There was plenty of time for that later.
“Did you miss me already, sweet thing? Am I that irresistible?” he said, his tone all deep and buttery and the image of him stark naked and soaking wet stole your voice for a moment. You couldn’t help but wonder if he was taking so long because he was- taking care of himself.
Your stomach whirled pleasantly at the thought of him stroking a hand along his thick-
“Hey! Don’t forget to tell him that they have like, zero manners. I’m appalled at how rude they all are. This is no way to treat a lady!”
Ivy’s irritated voice turned away from the phone for a moment. A crunch and a half-halted scream told you that she was more than handling herself against All Might’s minions.
You licked your bottom lip, squeezing your eyes shut and trying not to picture him behind the damn door again. Otherwise you’d never get out the words you needed to say. You’d get your chance to join him later, when your dumb obligation as his doctor wasn’t coming first.
“Um, Ivy says your little minions are out of control again. You might want to deal with that, big guy,” you informed him and you heard him swear loudly, a colourful mix of words that would have made a sailor blush.
The water, at long last, shut off.
You hadn’t really considered what would come next, despite the fact that he’d clearly left his pants- and by extension- phone right next to where you were standing.
The door opened and you suddenly had a face full of muscular, soaking wet chest. You barely even noticed his smug expression, too busy trailing your eyes down and focusing with laser like precision on the trail of blond hair that started at his bellybutton and vanished underneath his towel.
All Might had a fucking happy trail. How had you not noticed it earlier?
Oh yeah. All the blood.
You had died. You were dead and buried and this was Heaven and of course your version of Heaven would have a soaking wet, naked super villain in it.
Every brain function ceased and all you could register was the heat of the steam billowing out from behind him and the aching urge you now felt to catch the lone water droplet that was rolling down along his abdomen with your tongue.
It dipped into his bellybutton then out again, before soaking into the towel that he’d slung low around his hips.
“You know, as much as I’m enjoying your reaction sweetheart,” he rumbled, openly amused by your gaping, idiotic staring. “I do need my phone before I lose any more men to the sewer rat.”
“I fucking heard that, you jackass!” Ivy screeched and you were brought back to reality, aware that your face was now glowing red.
He leaned down past you and fished his phone from his pants pocket and you could feel the sweet, water warmed heat of his skin as he passed so close to you. You resisted the urge you suddenly felt to throw your legs over your head.
You didn’t even know if your legs could do that and Ivy might not appreciate having to wait any longer for a reprieve.
When he straightened up, he grinned at you and it was… different than his usual cocky smiles. This one was toothy and almost soft and his free hand came up to your chin, gripping it much like he had earlier. Except this time, it wasn’t to threaten you.
It was to bring your lips to his in a nipping, hard kiss that took the air out of your lungs.
Hnnng.
“Soon kitten,” he murmured, biting your bottom lip once more playfully. “Don’t forget, this was your bright idea.”
He winked at you before retreating back into the bathroom. You remained standing on the other side of the door for a long moment, cursing yourself for being so worried about him when you could be splayed out underneath him right now- morals be damned.
You only remembered that Ivy was still on the line when you heard her voice asking if everything was okay.
Fuck, it was more than okay. Not long from now, you were going to have that between your legs. More than ever you wished you hadn’t skipped all those yoga classes because this was going to be... challenging.
Said legs carried you shakily back down the hall and away from the temptation to break the door down while you waved your bra over your head.
Sexy.
“He’s um- he’s calling someone now,” you cleared your throat, choosing not to sit on your bloodied couch and instead canting your hip against your dining table. “Sorry Ives. If I’d have known he was AWOL I’d have made him call sooner. I know what those idiots are like…”
His henchmen were notorious for running riot without him there to rein them in. He was, surprisingly, like seventy three percent of their impulse control. It was a shame he lacked any himself.
“You know, I’m not even surprised any more,” she tutted. “He could have at least let one of his lackey’s know before he went and squared up against- wait-” Her voice paused just as she reached the bloody good bit and you fought the urge to interrupt. “Maybe he’s been too busy to phone anyone… Wanna tell me what you’ve been up to?”
Ivy knew what had gone down tonight by the sound of it. But she was also distracted and you knew you would get nowhere without indulging her curiosity first.
“Oh yeah, he’s been super busy getting a big ass gash on his shoulder stitched up. Not much time for phone calls,” you hedged slyly. Ivy didn’t need to know he’d also been busy with his mouth on your neck while you attempted not to moan like a a porn star. Definitely a detail that could be left out.
“Not going to lie sweets, I was convinced you were going to say getting a blowjob.”
“Fucking hell, Ivy.”
“What!? There’s nothing wrong with getting busy after a life threatening situation. I’m amazed that you both have so much restraint,” she said and despite your irritation over these villains all up in your personal life, you couldn’t find it in yourself to disagree with her out loud. “You said he was all sliced up? Did he tell you how he got it?”
Interest?
Piqued.
“No! He’s being really secretive about it,” you said hurriedly as though Ivy would hang up on you at any second. She wouldn’t but you were far too eager to hear this story and your brain refused to function normally. “Do you know?”
“I’m not technically supposed to, but well… henchmen talk darling, especially under the threat of pain…”
“Ivy spill,” you said, dragging the word out into a whine. Ivy loved to tell a tale but you were impatient now. You wanted to hear what had happened before he came out of the shower. Not just because you didn’t want him to catch you snooping in his business but also because there was the promise of fantastic sex to come too.
“Oh sweets, do I have a story for you,” Ivy squealed gleefully. Your heart beat hard in your chest in anticipation and you hoped that she wouldn’t drag it out too much. “I hope you’re sitting down for this because it’s just, mwah-” she made a kissing noise and you snorted.
“Ivy, come on. While I’m still young.”
“Tut tut, there’s no rushing a good thing. Or do you like it fast?” she teased, flirtatiously.
You rolled your eyes and tutted into the phone, not in the mood to be teased. At least… not by Ivy.
You checked over your shoulder- in case All Might had snuck up on you or was lurking in the doorway. He had a habit of doing that, just to make you jump. But he was nowhere to be seen, probably still on the phone, berating one of his second in command for their bad behaviour.
You hoped it was Shigaraki getting a talking to. That guy gave you nothing but bad vibes.
“So, I take it you remember last week, when you and I dished about that weirdo you treated? You know Hinata Cash?” she said his name almost cautiously as if worried that being too quick would bring back the memories before you would be able to handle them.
You made a strangled noise that could have been agreement as your brief but memorable encounter with Hinata Cash came rushing back from the deep, dark part of your memories that you’d shoved it into.
A chill raced along your spine.
“Are you okay, sweets?” Ivy asked cautiously.
“M’fine,” you said, clearing your throat. You wouldn’t let the mere mention of the creep make you uncomfortable. Ivy still paused until you reaffirmed that you were okay with talking about him though. “What about him? Is he still being a disturbing son of a bitch?”
Your bravado was all show. You both knew it, but Ivy continued like she bought into your act.
“Well, it turns out he was quite the talking point in some circles... Not enough to play with the big boys like your honey bun,” she said, probably giving the phone a shit eating grin. You didn’t even berate her for it and the teasing tone she’d aimed for fell away awkwardly. “But he was doing enough to get himself noticed. He’d started coming in to the Golden Cat on weekends. A few of the girls there told me about him…”
“All good things, I bet,” you said, rubbing your arm nervously. There was really no reason to feel nervous, not with your door locked and All Might in your bathroom, but that didn’t stop tendrils of unease winding around your neck.
“He started going by Scissorhands- Ugh, it was tacky if you ask me,” she sniffed primly. Never let anyone tell you that Ivy wasn’t a class act, you thought fondly. Still, the name made your insides twist uncomfortably. From what you’d seen on the snippets of news reports that day- he’d certainly lived up to his chosen name.
You had never been truly frightened in all the years that you’d been treating criminals. Even during that first meeting with All Might, you had never felt like you were in any immediate danger- so long as you kept your mouth shut and remained respectful.
But Cash…
He was the type to cut your throat because he didn’t like the colour of your curtains or some shit.
His entire visit had deeply unsettled you and set you on edge for days afterwards. Even now, despite the fact that he hadn’t delivered on his ‘promise’, you couldn’t really settle.
Every movement he’d made that day, every little twitch of his hands had caused your body to recoil and had it not been for the tight hold you had over your Quirk, you might have done more harm than good.
Thankfully, it had been a straight forward procedure but from the way your body trembled, you’d have thought it was your very first time all over again. He’d picked up on your nerves from the moment he’d sat down, leering whenever you flinched.
Glass and debris had become embedded directly under his left eye from the bank robbery he’d partaken in, just hours before. It had been on the Channel Five news, which was partly why you were so on edge. His fingers had still been bloody from the security guard he’d literally torn apart.
Heavy set, with wide shoulders and contrasting sharp features, you knew that had he made a move that day, you wouldn’t have had a chance to fight him off.
The shaking of your hands had thankfully been negated by your Quirk.
Precision wasn’t the most amazing Quirk in the world but it was particularly useful in your line of work. Being able to hit your target despite the shaking of your hands had saved you precious time.
Quick, yet terrified, you’d cleaned up his face and as politely as you could, tried to see him out. But his hand had clamped down on your thigh, too high for comfort and your whole body froze- your eyes staring unseeingly past him.
You couldn’t breathe in anything more than quick, frightened gasps. He seemed to revel in them.
You felt like a rabbit in the jaws of a wolf, seconds before the deadly bite.
He’d leaned in close, his breath repulsive and sour and you’d thought of a million ways to escape in those few seconds- none of them even remotely useful.
“I really appreciate this, Doc. It’s hard to find a woman with steady hands like yours...”
He had lifted one of them, examining it.
“Wonderful quirk. So useful... I can see why All Might likes you so much. I think I quite like you too.”
You had prepared for the worst. Mentally written your last will and testament and prayed to God that when he was finished with you he would just leave Marco be- the thought of him harming your cat suddenly far more prevalent in your mind than what was going to happen to you.
Strangely though, he’d simply gotten up from the chair, stroked your cheek as you sat there like a statue and then let himself out. Not before throwing his parting remark over his shoulder, though. The one that had been haunting you all week.
“I’ll see you again real soon, honey.”
Naturally, you hadn’t gone after him for the payment he’d skimped out on.
Hell to the no. Instead, you’d locked your front door, hyperventilated for a good fifteen minutes on your living room floor and then much to your embarrassment… you’d called All Might.
For the first time ever.
You had passed the call off as some dumb suggestion that he come over for pizza and a movie, like you were best friends and not potential-fuck-buddies. You hadn’t even had the strength to hide the tremble in your voice, nor the will to throw in any bravado. It had been a brutally honest call- one that you had never wanted to make.
It was like letting him see the real you. Removing that final barrier between you that might hold you back from feeling anything real. That conversation had changed something, you thought. Something deep.
“H-Hey! I know I never call like this but... I-I… Could you come over?”
Your voice had been small and shaky, with you on the verge of tears- even though you would rather die than let them fall over someone so vile.
There had been a pause on the other end, mid-way through whatever sarcastic thing he’d been about to berate you with.
“Please?”
You had added that without even thinking about it, voice catching and the grip of Cash’s hand still burning on your thigh. You had thought, in that silence, that he was going to brush you off. Either that or demand to know what was wrong. Thankfully, he did neither.
“Ten minutes.”
The longest ten minutes of your life. He had found you pacing a hole in the floor of your living room and petting the ever-loving bejesus out of Marco- stressed to the max. You’d locked eyes with him and he hadn’t even had to ask if you were glad to see him. Your face said it all.
He hadn’t asked what had happened and you hadn’t told him… but he’d stayed anyway. A real villain, that one.
“Sounds about right to me,” you scoffed, tone disgusted at the thought of that… that man. “Ives, I don’t scare easily, you know that... but I know full well what he wanted and it wasn’t a back rub. What does this have to do with why All Might turned up injured?”
You felt unsettled at having him brought up out of the blue. You’d been quite happy to forget all about him and the way that his gaze had made your skin crawl.
“Everything. The word should be getting out any minute now, about our dear departed Tim Burton knockoff.”
You paused, startled and unsure if you’d heard her right.
“Departed?”
“Oh, he’s very, very dead darling,” Ivy said lightly, as if she was just telling you the weather for the day.
The relief that washed over you was momentous and almost made your knees give way, causing you to grip the table for support. He was dead. You were free of the lurking shadow of fear that plagued your days and nights. The one that robbed you of decent sleep because you were jumping at every little noise in your apartment.
“Is it bad that I just wanna say ‘Oh thank God’?” you replied, breath knocked from you. Ivy laughed. She sounded just as pleased as you felt.
“You won’t be the only one, I’m sure. He must have put up a halfway decent fight, if it took you that long to stitch up a little old cut,” she said, pointedly as though waiting for you to work things out. She was probably disappointed that she didn’t get to see your reaction when you did.
Oh. Holy shit.
“All Might killed him!?” you squeaked, then lowered your voice drastically in case he heard you. “Are you fucking with me right now, Ivy? Because that’s not cool.”
You didn’t really know how to feel about it, if it was true. You were more than relieved that the looming shadow of Cash was gone forever but regretful that somehow, All Might had found out what you’d tried to keep from him and had gotten himself hurt in the process of doing something about it.
“It’s true,” she said, confirming it. “You and I both know I hate giving that overrated blowhard any credit… but something had to be done about him. Cash had it coming, either way. There are plenty of girls at the Golden Cat who’ll be glad to see him gone.”
You swallowed hard. Your silence was more you being concerned over All Might’s well being than over the fact that he had killed a man tonight. He’d killed plenty of people in the time you’d known him.
That wasn’t about to destroy the image of him that you had.
It was more the deep seated worry that always gripped you when he was involved in something dangerous. Usually, you could worry yourself sick over the news broadcast and at least then, if anything happened, you would know.
But tonight, he’d gone out there and gone one on one with a man who could rip people apart from the inside out- and you hadn’t even known. What if he’d never come back? What if he’d died because of you and word would get back to you, weeks down the line that you would never see him again?
Something horrid lodged in your stomach.
“Won’t he get heat from other villains?” you asked to distract yourself, rubbing the top of Marco’s head as he trotted past- blissfully unaware of your minor breakdown. “Isn’t there some… I dunno… Code of conduct or something? Honour among thieves?”
Ivy snorted, obviously amused at your blatant lack of knowledge. You would think that someone as deep into the criminal underworld as you were would at least know a little about how things operated. But no.
You chose to remain blissfully ignorant.
“Hmm, well here’s the thing. The King makes the rules and All Might, well… as much as I’m loathe to admit it, he wears the crown babes. Who the Hell is going to argue with him?” she asked and you bit your lip, the fear of retaliation lessening.
It was no secret that he was both feared and respected- enough to keep even the toughest of the tough under his thumb. There wasn’t a Hero or Villain in the world who could realistically take him on, one on one, and win.
That thought relaxed you and the horrid sensation lessened. It didn’t leave entirely, but it receded enough that you could breathe again.
“Anyway, to cut a long story short… Cash wasn’t exactly secretive about what he liked to do to girls. He was always running his mouth and tonight, he came in absolutely singing about some pretty little Doctor that he’d fallen head over heels for…” Ivy said sourly, obviously not enjoying this part of the story.
You enjoyed it even less. It didn’t take a genius to work out just who that Doctor was. Your hope that he’d just been trying to scare you when he threatened to see you again had been futile, apparently and you were suddenly so glad that you’d asked All Might to stay that night.
“ You’re pretty well known yourself around here, sweets. Did you know that?”
You hadn’t known, no, but you kept quiet.
“It didn’t take long for a few of the regulars to work out just who Cash was talking about. Word got around like wildfire and eventually got to old Shigaraki himself. From what I’ve heard through the grapevine tonight, it took five and a half minutes from Shigaraki calling his boss, until All Might was storming the Golden Cat.”
Damn, there had been you, badmouthing Shigaraki not ten minutes ago in your head. If it hadn’t been for him telling All Might, who knows what would be happening to you right now?
You made a mental note to be extra nice to him the next time you saw him.
The thought that Cash had been interested in you made you shudder, sickened at the thought of him even thinking about you like that. Your body felt grimy and you resisted the urge to run to the bathroom and scrub yourself clean.
All Might was officially your fucking hero and he could pry that word from your cold, dead hands.
Sure, he would be horrified at the implication but that didn’t make it any less true. Maybe that’s why he’d brushed off your questioning earlier, being difficult when you wanted to know how he’d been injured.
You caught yourself grinning stupidly, attempting to hide it by biting your lip. You realised that there was no point. Ivy couldn’t see you anyway.
“So, I think the message is officially loud and clear. No-one fucks with the good Doctor,” she laughed, all angelic and sweet and you beamed down the phone, laughing along with her. You felt a heady sort of rush as the realisation that you were safe again sunk in. That the villains you had helped and minded and treated like people over the years had heard that you were in danger and had come to the rescue in their own way.
The realisation that… that he cared. Deep down, past his angry and irritable nature, he really cared.
“Ivy, I-”
Without warning, two large, muscular arms wrapped around your waist from behind and you might have jumped had All Might not buried his face into your neck and rumbled a low, lazy growl, like a bear waking up from hibernation. He nuzzled you with a deliberate slowness, lips pressing warm against your throat.
“You still talking to the sewer rat?” he murmured, sounding annoyed because he knew you wouldn’t hang up on her just because he said so- and so he would have to wait as patiently as he could until you were done.
On the other hand, it was an opportunity to rile Ivy up as much as possible.
“It’s Vagabond, you overgrown man child,” she hissed down the line, all previous goodwill towards him gone from her voice.
All Might ignored her, choosing instead to tug you back until you were plastered against his chest and he could lay his kisses along your shoulder- even though he still had to stoop down to reach. How did he even get so tall? Your breath caught in your throat, longing and gratitude fighting for the number one spot.
He wasn’t going to stay patient for much longer and neither were you.
“Listen, I gotta go, Ives. Love you, babes,” you said quickly and she cackled manically, well aware of where you were rushing off to in such a hurry. This was only proving her right. She would be insufferable for weeks now.
“Love you too, sweets! Try not to break anything. Like the building.”
You hung up to the sound of her laughter and turned in All Might’s arms, surprising him when you pulled him down for a kiss. You were long past the point of worrying about morals and right and wrong. There couldn’t be anything wrong in wanting him like you did. In knowing that he protected you and cared about you in his own way- no matter if he never said it out loud.
He broke away, smirking.
“Someone’s eager,” he ground out, hands sweeping up along your sides. His thumb brushed the underside of your breast and you pulled in a shaky, uneven breath. “I bet you’ll be fucking soaking…”
Well, he wasn’t wrong. Those intense eyes trailed over your face, lingering on your lips until he locked his gaze with yours.
“Thank you,” you blurted out, without meaning to.
One of his eyebrows quirked, amused.
“You’re thanking me for making you wet? That’s a new one on me sweetheart but sure. I’ll take the credit where it’s due,” he laughed cockily, one hand on the back of your head as he dove forward again and kissed you roughly. This one was all teeth and tongue and your knees shook, suddenly feeling thankful that he was holding you up.
You moaned softly, powerless but confident under his touch.
There was no pushing him back, no sliding your tongue into his mouth because the man was a force of nature and practically every inch of him was pure muscle. So you were content to let him take what he wanted from you, for now. Later you would find a way to turn the tables- to make him the quivering pathetic mess.
Right now, all you wanted was to find out all of the ways he kissed.
The angry ones, the lust filled ones, the sweet ones. The good morning kisses and the I’m happy to see you kisses and all the fucking kisses in between. You were off to a great start. You sighed, tangling your fingers in his hair and stroking your thumb in a circle on his scalp.
He melted under your touch and deep down you revelled in the fact that he was just as affected by you as you were by him.
“I um,” you stuttered, swallowing hard when you reluctantly pulled away from him. He looked as though he wanted to follow your mouth but for a change he let you speak. “I didn’t mean thank you for- for that.”
“For what?” he asked knowing full well what you meant, his tongue darting out over his bottom lip.
“For…” Your face heated quickly, without you even realising it.
Without warning, a hand was shoved between your already shaky legs and he pressed upwards, cupping your pussy and dragging a half halting, surprised moan out of your throat. He almost took you off your feet and your fingers wrapped over his biceps to steady yourself.
“For. What?” All Might asked again, applying pressure in all the places you needed pressure applied. Oh you were well and truly fucked and he hadn’t even gotten you naked yet.
“Cause if you’re blushing now, kitten, then I can’t wait to see what you’ll be like when we really get going,” he continued, nuzzling along your cheek and rubbing his palm over your aching pussy. “M’not a mind reader. You have to tell me what you want. Where you want me. How hard you want me to pound into you. I wanna hear you sobbing my name like it’s the last fucking thing you’ll ever say tonight. Think you can do that for me? Hmm?”
You were gripping his arms for dear life, trying to focus on the steady heaving of your lungs. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“Yeah, yeah, I can do it,” you promised, almost without hearing the words come out of your mouth. “I promise.”
“Good girl,” he purred encouragingly and you just about lost your shit for a few seconds, along with any sense you might have had left as the praising words repeated on a loop in your head. “Now, I’ll ask again. What weren’t you thanking me for?”
He was grinning wickedly against your cheek, eyes boring into yours.
“For making me wet,” you responded finally, when your tongue no longer felt like it weighed a hundred pounds and you remembered how to speak actual words and not just garbled syllables.
He groaned- actually groaned like you were the one touching him, instead of the other way around and it sent a shivering wave of heat spreading out at the base of your spine. Your clit throbbed mercilessly under the heat of his palm.
“Christ kitten,” he said, voice hoarse. He didn’t pull his hand away like you thought he would though. You were still sensitive from your little dry humping session earlier and the pressure he was applying was agonising torture for so many reasons.
You both knew he would pull away though if you even tried to set the pace. He’d made it perfectly clear that he was in charge.
“Now, what were you thanking me for? You’ve got me all curious.”
You felt dizzy and the words didn’t exactly come easily. The heat radiating off of his bare chest was intoxicating and so was the sight of all those well defined, rippling muscles so easily within reach. You indulged yourself, seeing as you hadn’t been able to earlier. You lightly trailed the pads of your fingers over his pectoral muscle and down at a steady pace, over the hardness of his abs and then to the tempting, glorious V shape that led under-
Your smile came unbidden to you and he noticed, knowing immediately what you were grinning like an idiot about. He was wearing the pajama pants you’d gotten him.
They were simple, nondescript pants like any guy would wear but… you’d gotten them in his favourite colour and he’d actually put them on.
You’d expected him to either stay in his towel or well, just get the clothes out of the way entirely.
“Yeah, yeah,” he snorted, releasing you when he realised that he’d gotten your attention in an entirely different way. The loss of sensation between your legs was more than worth it to see him standing there, a little awkwardly, with his arms crossed. “Don’t be a jackass about it, for fuck sake. I just didn’t want to have my dick out when I was eating dinner.”
“Like that would bother you,” you beamed and he grunted something petulant that you didn’t hear.
“You gonna tell me what you’re thanking me for, or what?” he said after a moment, ignoring the obvious erection that was tenting the front of said pants. You found it very, very hard to ignore but dragged your eyes up to his face after a moment anyway. His self assured smirk was expected.
He knew how attractive he was and what it was doing to you. Damn him.
“Cash,” you managed to say after a moment and it clearly didn’t answer his question. He looked at you like you were an idiot.
“You… want cash? Here was me thinking you weren’t a whore,” he cackled, pleased at his own cleverness. You were less amused, punching him lightly in the arm. The shaking of his shoulders didn’t stop but at least he was no longer laughing out loud.
You were trying to spill your heart to the big jerk and he couldn’t stop mocking you for more than five seconds.
“Come on! Stop being a dick,” you scowled, arousal now tainted with annoyance. He rolled his eyes and scrubbed a hand over his slicked back hair, his laughter dying after a moment.
“Alright, alright! Explain yourself, woman,” he swept his hands out, metaphorically giving you the floor.
“Hinata Cash,” you elaborated, expecting the penny to drop. But when he continued to look lost, it slowly dawned on you that he’d never even bothered to learn the guys name. All he’d known was that he was going to do something to hurt you and… that had been enough for him to go on. Your heart thrummed in your chest. “Um, Scissorhands?”
Much like they had earlier, his eyes darkened, flashing a sudden warning that it wasn’t something he wanted to discuss. Unlike earlier though, you ignored it. Answers to your question were just out of reach.
“Why are you bringing up that motherfucker?” he asked gruffly, then swept past you almost dismissively before you could answer. He disappeared into your kitchen, his back to you. Not the reaction you had been expecting. The heated air had vanished- as had the playfulness he’d exuded moments before. “Way to kill a mood, doll.”
You suddenly regretted opening your mouth. He hadn’t told you- and if he hadn’t told you, there had been a reason for it.
“Shit,” you hissed softly to yourself, listening to him stomping around the kitchen behind you.
You turned and followed him, pathetically useless against the part of you that longed to be near him. Besides, there was no taking it back now and you were burning up with curiosity.
Why had he killed Cash? Why had he even bothered himself at all?
Most of all, you wanted- no needed to know.
Had he done it for you?
-------------------------
(Part One) (Part Two) (Part Three)
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Prelude IV: Relight
Post-Surgery: DAY ONE
[Sean sits in the hospital bed, legs crossed, staring into space when he hears a familiar voice.]
Joey: Sean, Sean Diaz? Well damn. I never thought I’d see your sorry ass again!
Sean: Geez Joey. Is that how you talk to all your patients?
Joey: Just the ones I like.
[Sean chuckles]
Joey: C’mere big man.
[Joey gives Sean a big bear hug]
Sean: How’ve you been Joey?
Joey: Can’t complain. These days, they got me up in hospice care. You’re probably the first person I’ve seen today that didn’t need their bedpans changed.
Sean: Sounds terrible.
Joey: It’s all not all bad. Lot of these folks have stories that you wouldn’t believe. One of my patients has lived through five wars and two depressions, tells me I’m a credit to my race.
Sean: Yeesh.
Joey: (shrugs) She means well. It’s almost flattering compared to some of the stuff I’ve heard. Been on this job almost ten years now, some people still treat me like I have no idea what I’m doing.
Sean: That sucks Joey.
Joey: Yeah... Anyway, you seem to be doing pretty well for yourself. From what I heard, this procedure cost a small fortune. You must have friends in high places.
Sean: Yeah, something like that.
Joey: And no guard at the door this time. I assume everything got cleared up with the police? Not planning to make a break for it again are ya?
Sean: Nah, no daring escapes this time.
Joey: Good. I don’t think I’d survive another blow to the head.
Sean: Listen Joey I’m really sorry-
Joey: (laughs) Relax Sean! I’m just messing with you! It’s ancient history as far as I’m concerned. Say, did you ever end up finding that brother of yours?
Sean: Yeah. He’s actually coming to visit me tomorrow.
Joey: Can’t wait to meet him!
Sean: Famous last words.
Joey: So… what you been up to these days?
Sean: Mostly just cramming for the SATs, drawing, listening to music. Normal teenage shit.
Joey: That’s good to hear. I was worried about you man. You went AWOL after the hospital. I got police and Feds breathing down my neck for weeks. Then a month later, I hear about a couple of kids trying the border to Mexico on the news.
Sean: Sorry I never reached out. I just didn’t want to get you more involved than you already were-
Joey: You made the right call. They questioned me for hours. My apartment was filled with G-men, my girlfriend was freaked. I honestly thought she was going to dump my ass.
Sean: I’m really sorry Joey.
Joey: Don’t sweat it Sean, it was for a good cause. Besides, everything worked out in the end.
Sean: Yeah I noticed, how long have you been-
Joey: Almost a year now. We’re expecting our first baby in the summer.
Sean: Congratulations dude!
Joey: Thanks, but honestly, I’m kinda nervous, don’t think I’m ready to be a father.
Sean: You’ll be a great dad, Joey. You’re awesome at taking care of people.
Joey: You’re damn right. Speaking of which, we should probably take a look at that eye of yours.
[Joey takes off the bandage and gives Sean’s eye a thorough examination]
Joey: Well it looks a helluva lot better than the last time I saw it.
Sean: That’s good to hear. I wasn’t sure it would work.
Joey: Well it’s too early to say if your vision will fully recover. But at the very least you won’t have to walk around with a patch anymore.
Sean: Good. It’s hard enough finding a prom date let alone one that’s willing to go with a pirate.
Joey: Still with the pirate jokes huh? Hopefully, you’ll have to write some new material after this.
[Joey applies a new bandage on Sean’s eye]
Joey: And you’re all set. Now as much as I love our talks, I gotta make my rounds. Buzz me if you need me.
Sean: Later Joey.
Joey: See ya tomorrow Sean.
[Joey leaves the room. Sean turns to look out the window. The door shoots open, and a small figure comes bursting in.]
Daniel: Sean!
[He jumps onto the bed and into Sean’s arms]
Stephen: (out-of-breath) Sorry, I tried to stop him, but he outran me.
Sean: You okay Stephen?
Stephen: I am… just need a minute to catch my breath. The old ticker ain’t what it used to be- I need to sit down.
Daniel: Take it easy grandpa.
Sean: What are you doing here, enano? I wasn’t expecting you guys until tomorrow.
Daniel: I made grandpa book an earlier flight. I just couldn’t wait!
[he hugs Sean again]
Sean: Haha easy. I just had surgery, remember?
Daniel: Oh right, s-sorry.
[There’s a brief flash, followed by a shutter click]
Sean: What’re you doing, gramps?
Stephen: Oh nothing, just commemorating the moment. Thanks to your brother, I finally got the hang of this newfangled smartphone camera.
Daniel (whispering): He had it stuck on selfie mode for days. Anyway, did it go? Is your eye…
Sean: I mean… it’s not 100% yet but I can sort of see again.
Daniel: T-that’s awesome! Can I see it?
Sean: Dude last time I showed you my eye, you almost cried. Besides, the doctors say I still need to keep the bandage on for a bit, while it heals.
Daniel: Right. That makes sense. Oooh this room looks cool. Do they have Netflix or a Playbox?
Sean: It’s a hospital, dude.
Daniel: Lame.
Sean: So catch me up. Did I miss anything interesting at home?
Daniel: Nah… Chris is still on that fishing trip with his dad so there’s no one to hang out with. Oh I almost forgot. He made you this card. Isn’t it awesome?
[Daniel gives Sean a hand-drawn “get-well-soon” card from Chris]
Sean: Yeah. It’s pretty cool. We can have Claire put it up when we get back.
Daniel: Grandma’s still in that feud with the lady from church.
Sean: Which one was that again?
Daniel: Agnes, the one who gives off major Lisbeth-vibes. She says grandma stole her casserole recipe for the church bake-sale. Lying bitch.
Stephen: Language!
Sean: Maybe one of us should try to smooth things over before it gets nasty.
Stephen: Hell hath no fury… lemme tell ya. I’ve been married to your grandmother long enough to know once that woman sets her mind on something… there’s no stopping her. Best to just let things run their course.
Sean: Claire can get a little… passionate sometimes. But I don’t think I’ve ever seen her lose her temper for real.
Stephen: There’s a fire in that woman. It’s part of the reason I married her. Just pray she never turns it on you. I hope I’ll never live to see that day, god willing.
[Sean notices Daniel circling the hospital bed, pressing his hand on various parts of the mattress]
Sean: (laughs) What are you doing, enano?
Daniel: Just trying to figure which side of the bed I want to sleep on tonight.
Sean: Dude. There’s no way this bed’s gonna fit both of us.
Daniel: The one in Mom’s trailer was way smaller!
Sean: Yeah well… you were a lot smaller back then.
Stephen: They have a nice area for visitors down the hall.
Daniel: But I want to stay with Sean!
Sean: I guess I could ask Joey to bring in a couch or something.
Daniel: Who’s Joey?
Sean: The nurse who took care of me after the accident. I told you about him, remember?
Daniel: Oh right! I can’t wait to meet him!
DAY TWO
Joey: How are we doing today? Any headaches, dizziness, socket pain?
Sean: Nah it’s all good. Still getting used to having depth perception again. It’s kinda weird.
Joey: You’ll get used to it. Anything else to report?
Sean: Nothing major. I’ve just been having some really weird dreams.
Joey: We have a psychiatrist on-site if you need a professional to talk to.
Sean: Nah it’s alright, probably just the drugs messing with my brain.
Joey: Well your vitals look good. We’ll go over some basic tests. You know the drill.
(Sean covers his right eye and tries to read the chart. Joey then shines a light and asks him to follow along. Finally, he asks Sean to put the cap back on the pen.)
Joey: You passed with flying colors. The doctor will be in for a final exam tomorrow and then we can discharge you.
Sean: (sarcastically) Too bad, I was ready to become the first Mexican pirate to attend college. So much for being a trailblazer.
Joey: Good to see you haven’t lost that snarky-ass sense of humor.
Joey: Anyway, I’m taking my lunch now. Want me to get you anything from the cafeteria? Wait… don’t tell me. Chocolate pecan?
Sean: You know it.
Joey: I met your brother in the hall. Cute kid.
Sean: (deadpans) Give it a few days. Then see if you get a “second opinion.”
Joey: He does seem a little… “energetic”. But that’s normal for kids his age.
Sean: Yeah one minute I’m his favorite person in the world. The next, he’s off doing God knows what, and doesn’t want me “bossing him around”. You know how it is.
Joey: Can’t say I do. Grew up in a house with three older sisters. Guess I must have been the annoying one. Daniel’s lucky to have you looking out for him. Must be tough sometimes.
Sean: Oh you have no idea.
[Joey claps Sean’s shoulder, he feels a jolt shooting up his spine, everything goes white]
(Sean sees a door marked: “Miranda A. Connolly, Hospital Director”)
Connolly: You’ve been a valuable asset to this hospital. Stellar feedback from all of your patients and attendings.
Joey: I sense a “but” coming.
Connolly: But, given the dubious circumstances surrounding your transfer and your past involvement with the law. The Board thinks it might be better for one of the other nurses to take this spot.
Joey: Please. I’ve got a kid on the way. We just bought our first house. Can you at least consider bumping up my pay? I haven’t gotten a real raise since I started here. There are kids coming out of nursing school that make what I make!
Connolly: The hospital has limited resources as it is, and the State just slashed our funding again. I just can’t justify raising anyone’s salary right now.
Joey: I break my back for this hospital, work extra shifts, get to know the patients. You promised me at the annual review that I’d-
Connolly: That was before this new information came to light. I’m sorry Joseph, maybe next year.
[Sean snaps out of his trance]
Joey: Sean? Sean are you okay?
Sean: Sorry, Guess I spaced out. Must just be the medication.
Joey: I can have the doctor come by and adjust your dosage.
Sean: I’m fine Joey. I swear. Weren’t you about to take lunch?
Joey: Oh right. We’ll pick this up later.
[Joey leaves the room, looking slightly puzzled.]
Sean: (thinking) W-what what was that? A dream? But It felt so… real.
[Sean takes out his phone and enters the name of the hospital, He finds their website. Under the ‘About’ section he scrolls to the Executive team bio. There is a photo of the woman he saw in the vision followed by a small blurb]
“Miranda A. Connolly is the President and Chief Director of Mt. Cedar General Hospital. She was appointed back in 2016 as Associate Director and has since made ground-breaking changes to the field of medicine and medical care. Under her leadership, this hospital was able to expand greatly, hiring new diverse staff members and vastly improving quality of care for all its patients.”
Sean: (thinking) Holy shit… it’s real. Does that mean I…?
Daniel: Hey Sean! What you looking at?
Sean: Dude! Don’t sneak up on me like that!
Daniel: I wasn’t sneaking. I was practicing my stealth!
Sean: Yeah sure.
Daniel: Are you looking at the new Playbox Pro? My birthday is right around the corner you know.
Sean: Birthday? It’s still January!
Daniel: Never too early to start preparing.
Sean: (rolling eyes) Yeah cuz everything’s always about you.
Daniel: Oooh I bet you were watching those dirty videos again. I’m tellin’ grandpa!
Sean: Hey hands off my phone you little-
[Daniel tries to grab Sean’s phone. Sean wrests his hand away. There is another a jolt]
[Daniel stands in front of the vending machine, staring at the jumbo chock-o-crisp. He looks around to check that the coast is clear. Then he waves his hand causing the chock-o-crisp to fall off the rack and into the dispenser slot.He gleefully retrieves it and devours the candy bar in a matter of seconds]
Sean: Dude, I told you not to eat any more chock-o-crisps! Do you want another trip to the dentist?
Daniel: What are you talking about? I haven’t had one in weeks!
Sean: Yeah sure. So you didn’t pig out at the vending machine before coming in here?
Daniel: How did you-
Sean: Maybe I have magic powers or maybe… you’ve still got crumbs on your collar.
Daniel: Aw, damn it. Promise you won’t tell grandpa.
Sean: Oh so you can tell on me but I can’t tell on you?
Daniel: (smugly) Exactly.
Sean: C’mere ya little shit!
Daniel: Sean stop! Ha that tickles. Quit it!
(After their little bout, Daniel curls up next to Sean, resting his head on Sean’s lap. Sean ruffles Daniel’s hair absentmindedly)
Sean: You ever wish you were… you know “normal” again?
Daniel: You mean not have my powers? Nah. They’re a part of me now. Besides, being normal is overrated.
Sean: (chuckles) I guess it is. But do you ever get that feeling like you thought you wanted something for a really long time but when you finally get it, it nothing like you thought it’d be?
Daniel: Uhhh… you mean like how I begged grandma to get me a PlayBox Live Subscription, but then the exclusives turned out to be shit? And now I have to act like I love it?
Sean: Yeah something like that.
Daniel: (yawns) Meh I’ll just ask for a gaming PC for my birthday.
Sean: Dude you’re like the greediest ten year-old I know.
Daniel: How many ten year-olds do you know?
Sean: Uh… just you and Chris.
Daniel: So, you want me to be more like Chris?
Sean: Wouldn’t hurt.
Daniel: (imitating Chris) “Only the purest of hearts may wield the power of Captain Spirit!”
Sean: Guess that rules you out.
Daniel: (playfully) Shut up.
DAY THREE
Doctor: Okay Mr.Diaz. I want you to follow the light. Look to your right, up and to the right. Good, good, excellent pupil response. Now look at the chart, cover your right eye and read this line.
Sean: Uh… A, O, E, P… T? Sorry I can’t really make out the last one.
Doctor: That’s okay, it takes time.
Doctor: Now this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but I recommend that you wear a patch over your right eye. It’ll be temporary of course, just until you learn to see with your left eye again.
Sean: (laughs dryly) And here I thought my seafaring days were behind me.
Doctor: You know… pirate actually wore patches so their eyes could easily adjust to the darkness and see below deck- Sorry my son’s going through a pirate phase.
Sean: I know the feeling. My little brother’s been through every phase imaginable.
Doctor: Kids, you gotta treasure every moment. Because before you know it, they’ll be all grown up, ready to go off on their own. Look at me, rambling on. Anyway, I signed your discharged papers. They’ll schedule you for some outpatient care in the coming months.You’re almost ready to go.
Sean: Sounds good.
Doctor: And you’re sure you don’t want to get do something about that nasty scar? A good-looking kid like you, it would be a shame to-
Sean: That’s okay, I think I’ll keep it… as a reminder.
Doctor: Alright but if you ever change your mind, I could refer you to a great plastic surgeon.
Sean: Thanks Doc, for everything.
Doctor: The pleasure’s all mine, Mr.Diaz. The groundwork we laid here could help hundreds of other patients in the future. We are making history. Your nurse should be along in a moment to help you get discharged.
[Sean sits in quiet contemplation. Reflecting on his dreams and new “vision”]
Sean (thinking): Be careful what you wish for...
Joey: Looks like everything’s good to go. Remember to use your eye-drops-
Sean: Twice a day. Yeah Joey, I know.
Joey: Guess it’s goodbye again. Don’t be a stranger this time okay?
Sean: I won’t.
Joey: Here’s my number. Call me if ever need professional advice or just want to shoot the shit.
Sean: Thanks Joey. Let me know how everything goes with the baby.
Joey: Oh don’t you worry about that. Soon I’ll be blowing up your phone with pictures.
Sean: Haha can’t wait.
Joey: Now hospital policy says I gotta wheel your ass outta here. For liability reasons.
Sean: At least it’ll be a smoother exit than last time.
Joey: (laughs) Get in the chair smart-ass.
Beaver Creek, One Week Later
Sean: Okay, you ready?
Daniel: (takes deep breath) Alright. Show it to me.
Sean: So… how does it look?
Daniel: Looks… normal.
Sean: You almost sound disappointed. Were you expecting a bionic eye or something?
Daniel: No. I just… it looks good. I like the scar; makes you look extra tough.
Sean: You think so?
Daniel: Yeah… totally badass!
Sean: Thanks, enano.
Daniel: You need a new codename, like Scarred Wolf or Deadshot Diaz!
Sean: Let’s leave the nicknames up to Chris.
Daniel: Hey! I make up awesome names too!
Sean: Whatever you say,“Superwolf”
#life is strange 2#life is strange#sean diaz#daniel diaz#captain spirit#chris eriksen#stephen reynolds#lis2#captain spirit ww#joey peterson
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Hey so sorry ive been AWOL for so long. between covid stress and thesis work and other college work ive not been up to much. Finals week is coming up soon ish so I can’t promise that I won’t be doing much more then lurking like I have been but!! Imma try and do some drafts and stuff and generally be more active on here again
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Hey! How are you? I'm glad you're back. No pressure but I really miss your writing. D: Is it ok if I ask when you'll be able to post another one? I hope things are ok on your end and you're taking care of yourself. (pls don't feel pressured, ive just been reading through your fics multiple times now lol) <3 <3 <3
hello, anon! I'm doing better thank you. :) I'm sorry that I went AWOL again. Ironically, work’s been toxic bc the team I’m with are a-holes 🙃 so I've been in the process of job-hunting.
aaaah I haven’t written much actually, but after reading a lot of fics I missed here (hello god tier pairing that is Ciri/Eskel 🥵) I can feel an itch to write again. no promises, but I hope I get to publish some filled-out prompts sooner than later.
thank you for your sweet message!!! you just cheered me up 💛
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Sorry ive been AWOL for a while! Updated rules here in the UK means i'm back at work and i can see my boyfriend again☺️ it's so lovely! Now i'm back and i'm here to shoutout another Black author! I saw some photos of this book last year and just knew i wanted this beautiful hardcover edition of #withthefireonhigh by @acevedowrites ❤️ #book #books #bookstagram #bookishlove #bookphotography #read #reading #reader #blogger #blog #bloggerlife #bloggersofinstagram #bookphotography #bookstores #reading #readersofinstagram #review #bookreview https://www.instagram.com/p/CB6BQT1jYBd/?igshid=plllh9j9mola
#withthefireonhigh#book#books#bookstagram#bookishlove#bookphotography#read#reading#reader#blogger#blog#bloggerlife#bloggersofinstagram#bookstores#readersofinstagram#review#bookreview
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You and I, Me and You [33]
[CW: References to human trafficking/trading. Focused on recovery and healing.]
[Teaser and Master List] [Archives of our Own] (Lost and Found: Chapter 8)
Trust.
[<-- Previous] ~ [Next -->]
Cricket chirps. Soft footsteps and the whir of the wheels. The sloshing of the liquid in the bottle that sat in the cupholder of the wheelchair and the jostle of the fabric. A Q.B. uniform, a splayed black coat hugging a figure on a wheelchair and a black tracksuit moved in choreographed harmony. Like shadows that dissolved in the still darkness of night. Slinking between the buildings, on the empty, balmy roads that were laid out like grids. Zizi rode the remotely operated chair with tranquillized silence. She looked as restless as Jared felt. Their encounter had unearthed something that reared its ugly head from the past. A hungry monster, that sapped their peace and energy alike. It made everything feel uncomfortably personal and Jared was left feeling vulnerable. Akira’s prodding earlier that day did not help. And he found himself wishing now that Novara had been anywhere else but with her. Tariq’s relatively neutral presence was welcome, they did not ask each other for elucidations. The men had let the moment stir them into a wordless acceptance. Soon they were ascending the elevator of the living quarters for the trainee BioHackers.
There was a soft rap on the door. Akira locked eyes with Nova, before she slid off the bed to answer. She immediately had to flatten herself against the wall to give way as the men pooled in after the wheelchair. She had only dealt with patients, who were amputees. From the way Zizi rolled into her life, it already felt like she was going to be more than that. Akira quickly realised she could only be helpful by staying out of the way. A part of Nova was relieved that Zizi was unconscious as her limp body was lifted to the bed. Nova busied herself with the MedScan feature of her CommCube. “I’m going to need some things from the hospital wing…” “I’ll get them.” Akira was eager. She wanted to be useful and she had enough experience in the field to manage such a simple task. Nova quickly listed what she needed. “I’ll go with Shira…” Jared offered, speaking of her, but not to her. He sought a reason to not be in the room because he did not want to make matters worse for Zizi when the tranquilizer wore off… And for himself. The woman was likely to have enough on her plate with just Nova. “I don’t need your help.” Akira responded sharply. Jared’s brief disappearance after he abruptly left their conversation on the pretext of getting food left her prickly. The time he took in getting back was warranted, given the circumstance, but she still could not reconcile with the fact that he did not find a single moment to let her know or give her a heads-up. Instead, he chose to just go AWOL. Jared did not see the reason for her hostility and bit back the urge to respond in kind. “I need to get stuff checked any way... Mind if I come along, Kira?” Tariq muttered. It felt like the easiest way to keep things on an even keel. Novara looked stressed as is. He did not really give her a chance to protest and led the way out. Akira strode out, wearing her stormy demeanour and offering Jared a side-eye he did not think he deserved. === Tariq lightened Akira’s mood as they shared some joy over Ezekiel’s fate. He took pleasure in describing exactly how things transpired. They marvelled over how well Nova handled it. “If the serum doesn’t work as intended for whatever reason, I’ll tell whoever asks that I tried some shit, ‘kay?” Akira’s question was anything but. It was a declaration. She sifted through the cabinets and drawers for all the things that Nova needed for Zizi. Patches, IVs, NG-Tube, electrolyte solutions… Akira picked up a straitjacket for good measure. Tariq would have protested if he had seen her do so. He instead, was surreptitiously pocketing a vial of the advanced shealing serum. His injured hand had not come out of his pocket at all and he did not let Akira know of it. “You were nowhere close to the scene. I was…” Their whipping scars were still raw, and they were arguing about who got to take the blame for this situation. Everything Akira collected was shoved into a sling bag. “We’ll see how it all pans out. T… I can carry all this on my own. Get some rest, will you?” Tariq looked haggard. After everything with Ezekiel and being the one who found Zizi, she could see why. These were not the kind of battles he fought. Akira implored him to take some time for himself. And this was without her knowing about his injuries. “I-” She was quick to interrupt him. “Y’know you’re going to wear yourself out and eventually make a mess of everything…” They knew she was only half-joking; it was a quality the two of them shared, among others. He really was out of his depth. His presence would not hinder, but it would not aid either. With some reluctance he agreed and promised to check back on all of them later. “Don’t worry about it.” Akira sought some solace in being the one reassuring her friends today. I can do this; I can be there for them too. === The three pairs of eyes were trained onto Zizi after she had been adequately replenished with fluids. They watched as her limbs slowly came to life. Slowly and barely as the tranquilizer finally wore off. Jared considered bolting out of the room. Instead, he waited by the door, away from Zizi’s immediate field of view. Akira on the other hand stood beside where the woman lay, crowding her a little. Nova sat on the other side of the bed. “Hi Zizi… I’m Akira… How’re you feeling?” Jared and Nova let her take the lead. Another new person. The voice sounded friendly enough, Zizi did not open her eyes yet. She felt a mattress under her. Her head was cradled by a pillow. Such simple luxuries… She found herself relishing them with an embarrassing amount of contentment. “Sorry about the slight mess… by the way.” Akira added and averted her gaze briefly, afraid that if it lingered too long on Zizi, she might betray sympathy in a manner that came off as pity. She unnecessarily fussed over folding a towel that was drying on her chair. There was nothing else there. Just the sheets on the bed were sprawled, and the cabinets of the kitchen were still slightly ajar. Zizi wasn’t going to notice those things anyway. She was still addled by whatever she had been injected with. Her movements were slow, but she turned to scan the room with narrowed eyes. Her eyes widened instantly when they fell upon Nova, whose eyes were still bloodshot and swollen from the tears she had shed. Zizi drew a ragged breath and the flash of fear in her expressions dissolved into a resignation. I know Nova meant well and I know Ezekiel didn’t. “Can I talk to you?” Zizi’s voice was barely a whisper. Akira missed Zizi’s request. “Should I brew us some tea? I’ve got some… generic green, jasmine… mint… chamo-” Jared did not. He tried too hard to tune it out that it only resulted in him being more attuned to it. At least she isn’t rapping anymore. So he interrupted her. “I think Zizi wanted a moment with Nova.” Akira was already filling the kettle. She set it down and put her hands on her hip lazily. “They’re both here, right? I’m ju-” “Alone.” She narrowed and squared off with Jared. “And you think that’s a good id-” He cut her off again. His tone was slightly impatient. “They’ve spent time together already…” Jared did not expect to get into the thick of things with Akira right now. He could not see that she was trying to normalise things in her own way. That they were simply not in agreement about how things should proceed. Aki drew a deep breath. If you cut me off one more goddamn time… She did not think it through when she decided to drag Zizi into this. “I think she can tell us that herself…” “Shi- Akira!” Jared exclaimed, completely flabbergasted with Akira’s behaviour. She certainly was not being prudent, but he too was not thinking clearly. Akira raised her eyebrows in an unspoken and pettish question. What? Zizi purposely kept her gaze off the source of Jared’s voice. It was less familiar to her than his face; less likely to trigger her slip into rap mode again. A part of her feared it may lead to tranquilization again. As easy as it was to slip into nothingness, she wanted to enjoy her autonomy for what it was worth. She could hear the famous Red Knight trying so hard to act professionally while Akira approached the matter more on instinct. The intimacy between them was hard to miss and the friction was palpable. Neither of them was wrong. The exchange was like a tennis match, till she was dragged into it. And Zizi intervened like an umpire would. She was not too reluctant to ask for what she wanted. The world would have crushed her a long time ago if she had chosen silence. “I would like to talk to Nova - alone…” She did not hesitate to make her preference known. Choices had been a rarer luxury in captivity. Now that she was out, she lapped at every chance she got to exert her will. Her voice was clear, but soft, it demanded attention in a way that a louder voice never could. They were forced to fall silent to give her a chance to speak. And Akira did have the grace to do that, even though she was fuming. She deliberately avoided looking at any of them. There was a flash of an inexplicable venom and deep mortification in her eyes, best directed towards the panel of the induction stove. “If that’s okay with you…” Zizi addressed Nova this time. Akira did not know those words were not directed at her at all and managed a weak nod as she set her tea box aside. Novara recognized the question was for her and apprehensively nodded too, much more eagerly, but did not say anything given Akira’s assumption. Her friend was feeling prickly and Nova did not want to make matters worse. Technically, this was Akira’s room and they were all taking a lot of liberties intruding this way. Nova believed in Akira’s inherent generosity. Akira was now resolutely quiet and chewed on the inside of her mouth. For once she understood why Jared chose silence sometimes. It was he who filled it, to reassure the victim in the room. “I think it is brave that Zizi would like to spend some time with Novara after everything…” And accidentally diminishing the other victim in the room by adding words addressed to her. “You should know how difficult that is… and how much courage it probably takes...” Jared had not expected this to be as much of a struggle. Akira’s head hung for a moment. Her body lost something, like bones, because her petite frame slouched. In a motion akin to slithering, she dragged herself out of her own room, muttering. “Right… Well, excuse me, then.” Jared followed and closed the door behind him, leaving Novara and Zizi alone. He wanted to be within earshot and reach. Akira’s concern was a consequence worth considering. He did not tell her that though, perhaps he should have. He lingered in the corridor. Akira did not. It was her turn to take a solitary walk. And he let her go. - Nova looked a little apologetic, not for her friends’ behaviour per se, she knew that they too had been through a lot, but given that Zizi didn’t have any context, it was probably uncomfortable for her to witness. “Don’t worry… There is… That’s just Jared and Akira.” The medic’s voice was soft. And she casually broke the illusion Jared had tried to create. Nova did not see the reason to build walls around the woman. They had been through so much together. Zizi was not uncomfortable in the least. She was left amused. “Don’t worry… I’ve seen much worse.” Nova shuffled in place. Her knees sinking in and out of the mattress. “I- I’m so sorry… Z, I-” A choked back sob, a stifled sniffle and a shaky breath. “-I never meant for any of this… For...” “I know." Zizi replied simply. Nova gulped and looked at her with wide sorrowful eyes. She did? She blinked away the tears. “I could kinda see you hated it… I saw past his shit eventually and… I’m sorry too.” Zizi did sound apologetic herself. She wanted this time with Nova, just to let the poor BioHacker know, that Ezekiel did not win. That he did not succeed in villainizing Nova. Nova wrapped her arms around herself, shaking her head slowly. “You… you shouldn’t have to be.” “I did try and kill you.” Zizi thought she could handle this heart-to-heart with ease. She could not. She resisted the urge to break into a rap again and gently massaged the stub of her arm as it began tingling. It had been a tough few month, among the worse of Zizi’s life at least in terms of raw, physical suffering. To be torn up repeatedly, one way or another and painfully be put back together. But she had lost everything before and she held on. She could do it again. She would. Nova’s reassurance was bland and honest, and she noticed Zizi’s discomfort. “I’d want to kill me too, in that… situation. Are you ok? Can I get you something?” “No… I’ll be fine… He called you Supernova...That was never a compliment, was it?” That derogatory name. A darkness found its way into Nova’s being and she shook her head with an added vehemence. But it was not his voice; it did not grate against her being. “No… No, it was not. But it is nothing compared to what you, to what you and Ge-” She could not find the nerve to say his name. The name that no one would use again, not for him. There was no one left to call. Zizi had come to terms with losing the man she temporarily shared that hidden room with. Death was not uncommon in the Pit. Nova had not. She could not bury what happened, like Ezekiel presumably buried Genzo. Did he even bury Genzo? The thought chilled her. Ezekiel had thrown Genzo to the wolves before he was ready, before Nova’s serum had made him whole. Zizi was made to watch the fight where he was taken down. He was not brought back to the hidden room that night. Nova did not know about Bloody Blitz – The Pit of Doom… So, when she inquired about Genzo, Ezekiel simply stated that he was gone, and that she was responsible for it, for not fixing him well enough. And that day Zizi lost the little freedom she had. As did Nova who was pinned like a butterfly, under the weight of the life she could not save. And the life she now had to – Mine! Zizi thought, before Ezekiel’s voice rang in her head. “No more going to the Bloody Blitz till Nova has perfected the serum…” From that day onwards, the pain she received had been methodical and at Eze’s hands. It was solely for the purpose of testing the serum. She was reduced to nothing but a lab rat. At least she always came through. I do owe my life to her. Nova finally understood what Akira meant when she compared degrees of suffering. Pain was pain. But Zizi had had it so much worse. Nova sidled closer to her, tentatively. Zizi did not mind, she was quite accustomed to Nova’s presence in her private space. It was refreshing to see her softer side, one that was not governed by the strings Eze pulled. Strings he did not want Zizi to see, but she had. “You did the best you could for Genzo…” These were not empty words. Their fingers found each other. The skin on the back of their hands sat in such stark contrast, their palms less so. Nova knew Zizi’s anatomy too well, to not know anything about her as a person. It felt unfair and wrong. Her soft mutter carried a whine attesting to that. “He, he never quite told me where he… where he found you both…” “What did he tell you?” The counter question sounded a little sharp. Nova clammed up a little, her words were a jumble, just like his answers had been, if he ever indulged her questions to begin with. She had to stop asking when it irritated him enough to make matters worse for Zizi. “From, prisoners of war, to criminals, to street rats… drug addicts…” He deliberately gave enough answers, for Nova to never know which one was true or if all of them were. He played with her, till it was amusing. Till he could revel in the friction between the women. She wanted Zizi to have the whole truth as much of it as she could offer. There was an insistence in the way she spoke. “He made me believe you were dangerous, like you were… you were both on death row. That is why we didn’t mourn G-” She shortened the name to a letter, so it didn’t keep getting caught in her throat. “-because Eze said, he didn’t deserve it. But he did! He deserved it!” Nova forgotten to breathe between the slurry of her words, now she gasped in short, exhausted sounds. “Everyone does. And I did not believe him, but…” She looked at Zizi pointedly now. Unflinchingly, fearlessly. She wanted her to know, no matter how dark her past truly was… Nova didn’t think that it was okay for her to suffer the way she had. “Even if any of what he said was… is true… Nothing made- nothing makes what I did okay… What he made me do… what he made me do.” She switched between talking about it like it was something in the past, because her hope reminded her that it was. But her grief anchored the pain, Zizi’s and hers to the present. She licked her lips. She finally stopped; the woman had not expected to spiral into this conversation. Nova had poured all this out, for the second time today. It felt easier to divulge this time around, because she had gathered her thoughts while talking to Akira. Zizi let her, in silence, clutching onto the medic’s hand gently. It truly was inspiring to finally meet the real Novara. I am surprised the world has not chewed you up and spit you out, Novara. You must be doing something very right. Empathetic, empowered and brilliant. “All the things he said were somewhat true… I guess. Genzo and I were drawn against each other in the pit… and we fight to knock-out or kill… So…” Zizi licked her dry lips. Nova immediately reached for the bottle of water, she helped Zizi sit up enough to sip from it. She gathered the will to go on. “He found us on the brink of death… and promised to save us, but only if he could keep us for himself.” Nova’s skin crawled. But she should have figured. Especially recently after everything else Ezekiel had done, so blatantly, with such little regard for the pain he caused. “How- from?” Zizi closed her eyes again, the lyrics of her rap rose in her throat. Nova was familiar with Ritonix’s entire discography – Zizi had screamed her way through the songs on every encounter with Nova, the needle and the syringe full of the serum. Zizi did not want to trigger the medic. She wanted her to know that she felt safe now. Zizi also did not want to answer the question. She pursed her lips. She thought of Jeremy. He only wanted to save her… To save them. He had been kind; she did not want to implicate him in this either. He would most likely end up taking the fall for it all. He would be the likely scapegoat, because Bloody Blitz was an intricate system. It ran too deep and what could a handful of agents possibly do to fight it. Zizi did not want the people who were trying to help her, to get entangled with that monster. Upon noticing the doubt and fear flit across Zizi’s face, Novara felt rankled. This was betrayed in the way she swayed a little. “It’s ok… It’s ok.” Nova murmured, to Zizi and to herself. Genzo and Zizi had been brought to her with severe injuries. The first time she helped them, it was out of desperation. They had just been her patients and Ezekiel had convinced her that using the serum would be mercy. And then it became a habit. Nova had questions then and she had questions now, but she did not get a chance to ask them. Zizi had already shared enough and she had a question of her own, one she could not ask Tariq… or worse, Jared. She could not allow herself to feel this vulnerable around them. But Nova had already seen her at her worse. She massaged her right arm with more vigour now as she arrived at an unnerving realisation. “…Nova, what exactly happens to me now?” All this time, Zizi had leashed the fear that leapt from the uncertainty of the situation. And now the leash broke. “I- You… It will never-” She closed her eyes and cleared her throat. Nova could not afford any hesitation marring what she wanted to say. Despite the ambiguity of the future, she would not let Zizi suffer again. Her eyes opened with her usual fierce resolve. “You will never be traded again or belong to anyone again like that. That’s for sure.” There it was again, that conviction, that felt so true that reality crumbled against it. Her radiant hope did not convince Zizi entirely, but the Fighter smiled weakly. Nova intended to do whatever it took, to keep her promise. She could tell that there were more sorrowful secrets buried in the woman’s past and she did not want to try disinterring them. Not right now. Zizi did not need to relive any more horrors. It would not help recover and that was of paramount importance. “And we don’t need to talk about everything right away… You need to rest, and I need to run some more tests… if that’s ok.” Zizi quickly slid lower into the bed, craving the comfort more than she was willing to admit. Her body had not felt the embrace of soft covers and a mattress for far too long. “For the last few days, I thought Ezekiel forgot me and that felt like a blessing… Dying in that cell. This- This feels like a miracle…” she closed her eyes and surrendered herself to Nova’s administrations, this time willingly and trustingly. Nova used the MediScan feature on her CommCube and recorded the vitals and other measures again. And stayed with Zizi till the woman fell asleep.
Tags: @lettuceknighted, @quirkykayleetam
#whump#rescue#caretaking#healing#building trust#difficult relationships#circumstantial friction#oc Jared#oc Akira#oc Novara#oc Zizi#oc Tariq
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Hello! I’m sorry I’ve been AWOL, things came crashing down with my demon and I ended up terminating my blog that was pretty much dedicated to him, and I just, ive been struggling. I miss feeling safe and loved yknow? It’s not like I’m alone but still, no one seems to even come close to the way he made me feel. But I’ve missed you lots, hopefully I’ll be around more often again if that’s okay with you! -✨
I’m glad to have ya back. I’m sorry things have been tough for you. Just know you could message me anytime 💕 stay safe my little glitter anon
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