#sorry im going through something right now and I'll be normal in the morning
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microwavetoaster-selfships · 4 months ago
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All the stock images of the 10th Doctor are. Silly. Like geniune white-backdrop, doing some random pose or expression stock images. Like not "this is the picture png stock image that gets slapped on his wiki and other places" but like the if you Google "stock images of people" it's just that. Except him.
#carry me through these trying times.#sorry i. Am trying not to talk about it a ton but i wanted to mention it at least here and on discord once but.#Im having a bit of a MomentTM. Particularly what im praying(knock on wood) is a hypocondriact one.#It probably wont effect here as much and most my discord but. If i seem a little extra inactive then that is why.#Dont worry I'll make an update post when I am rejoicing in “I was right!! I was just massively overthinking it all and nothing is wrong!!!”#Again. knocking on wood. Only fates I want to jinx are the ones where I say i wont catch feelings for a character and then i do.#anywho. on a lighter note.#I teasered this a little bit in my last post I was wondering if anyone would notice I put Doctor Who in that pile of fixations.#Though I think someone. cough. Mightve had an extra pre-teaser to it due to. me suddenly mentioning it while in a mutual server. cough.#but I think someone else in the server is a double so im just going to. this blog is going to be getting my blunt force of it.#truthfully I normally leave servers that have doubles but considering theyve never talked about them then.#As long as that continues. Im. Will be fine. SOULY JUDT BECAUSE hes new to me and they never spoke of him.#If this was an F/O i already had then even if they never mentioned them I'd still probably go.#this is why i. get a bit bummed whenever someone doesnt list their F/Os. especially because for some reason-#-I've been on a streak of getting into increasingly more and more popular fandoms.#Im beginning to think im just using this as a coping mechanism at this point by overwhelming myself-#-with huge amounts of new big strong feelings that clog and clutter my mind.#wow Kane. selfshipping? to cope? what a new and unique idea /j/j/j/sarcasm#these tags were supposed to end after the first couple of sentences. hello everyone.#If you read all this here's 25$ to go spend on something nice. Get whatever you'd like.#i wouldnt put it past me to fall for different iterations of the Doctor as well but that is purposely exactly why I am-#-skipping ones and doing only this particular iteration one. Thank you wiki page that listed out what episodes are what doctors.#I mean they're all technically the same one. but also not. but also I dont entirely know what im talking about.#okay OKAY clamming up now. Good morning everyone. sending you all peace and tranquility
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whorelaud · 7 months ago
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OFF LIMITS – rafe cameron ¡ (06)
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social media & irl AU !
pairing brother's best friend!rafe cameron x brat!reader summary you slide into a random boy's dms on instagram, anything but expecting him to end up being your brother's best friend, let alone the person you'll be spending your summer vacation with. while resisting Rafe and his lingering gazes was an option, you found yourself in the constant loop of crossing the line; said line being your brother. ch content fluff, suggestive (sorry...) unresolved tension, a slight panic attack (nothing too serious!), confrontation, lil angst?!?!
NAVIGATION. series masterlist | 05 ! 06 ¡ 07
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rafecameron
WY@ - brent faiyaz 
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liked by sarahcameron, ryanontop and 1,982 others
rafecameron Doing shit I really shouldn't do for real 🤷🏼‍♂️
view all comments 
yourusername nice post g ↳ rafecameron Thanks g ↳ yourusername you're welcome homie 💯 ↳ rafecameron I’m not your homie ↳ yourusername alr bro 😎 ↳ rafecameron ���� 
yoursername rafe cameron is never beating the slut allegations ↳ rafecameron I'll take that as a compliment thank you! Learned from the best 😊 ↳ yourusername Are you slut shaming me right now ↳ rafecameron WHAT NO I’m just saying like you know ahah Ahaha fuck ↳ yourusername yeah right ↳ popeheyward This is gross by the way ↳ yourusername shut up
sarahcameron put that cigarette down little boy ↳ rafecameron Did bug give you the ‘little boy’ virus… ↳ yourusername it's not a Virus. Embrace it 💜 ↳ rafecameron Okay 💜
sarahcameron you forgot the #aimed ↳ rafecameron Shut up Sarah ↳ yourusername LMAO
yourusername watchu know about brent ⁉️ ↳ rafecameron I love Brent ↳ yourusername hmm 🤔 ↳ rafecameron Are you doubting my music taste right now? ↳ yourusername Yes
ryanontop Shii baby you look fine asl 😍 ↳ rafecameron Stawp! 🙊 ↳ jjmaybanks Awh fawk nah
popeheyward Yooo 🫡 liked by rafecameron
user1 Nah who got my dawg posting song lyrics ☠️
user2 Bro’s pussy whipped
user3 who hurt you bae ❤️
user4 may god bless me with your genes ↳ user3 ?? what ↳ user4 im saying iw ant to have his kids 😊
user5 bismallah my body had a reaction to the third slide ❤️
user6 this is fucking insane go fucking kill yourself you fucking manwhore stop fucking posting shit like this ↳ yourusername this is so real you go user6 ↳ user6 thank you 😇 someone needed to say it ↳ rafecameron Uhhh
user7 i told my parents about us
kelc3eee Fit is hard 🔥 ↳ rafecameron Thanks
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It’s been three days since you last kissed Rafe, and yet, you still couldn’t get the thought out of your head, reminiscing over the memory each time you strived to distract your mind from it. 
Waking up the next morning was like a punch to your stomach, your hopes of it being a dream instantly destroyed with the harsh reality of kissing Rafe. You ended up practically locking yourself in your room, too afraid Rafe might say something, address the said kiss and stupid mistake of reaching for his face in the first place. 
To your surprise, Rafe did not bring it up, greeting you with a sheepish grin once you joined them downstairs. It puzzled your brain, as it filled with a million questions over why he didn’t make an effort to bring it up. It was slightly disappointing, even if it was a mistake, he had every right to sort out the situation, pull you to the side and remind you how wrong it was to kiss him, knowing well aware that he was forbidden to the touch. 
But he didn’t, and if he did hint it, you definitely chose to look past it, brushing it off everytime you found yourself alone with him, choosing to avoid the situation and feign ignorance to the way your heart would stupidly flutter.  
Now, three days have passed, and things are, well, they’re normal. Your friends were surfing, while you sunbathed on the shore, not in the mood to get yourself wet. Rafe, of course, never left Ryan’s side, messing around with your brother to get him riled up, knowing how mad he easily got. 
Their giggles echoed through the distance, tugging a faint smile on your lips as you admired from afar, squinting your eyes due to the bright sun beaming through your skin, blocking your vision even with the pair of sunglasses you had on. 
Your arms plopped up against the towel beneath you, supporting your body from giving out, even after maintaining the same position for over a while now. The smile on your lips faltered at the sight of Rafe exiting the water, straightening up when you noticed him strolling in your direction. 
Heat flushed your face as you caught sight of his bare chest, waterdrops running along the sunkissed flesh, leading down to his drenched shorts, as they hung low around his hips. Your throat ran dry when your gaze halted just beneath his bellybutton, the trail of hair leading to under the fabric of his bottoms leaving little to the imagination. It drove you crazy, eager to see where it guides, head wandering with sinful thoughts every time you caught sight of it. 
You cleared your throat, busying yourself with something else, fearing Rafe would catch you practically thirsting over him. The latter however, didn’t say much, dusting the sand off the towel beside yours, before he sprawled himself next to you, crossing his legs to mimic your position. 
“Why aren’t you joining the rest?” Rafe questioned, cutting through the comfortable silence. 
“Not in the mood.” You replied, keeping your answer short, afraid your voice would crack if you further spoke. 
“‘S that so?” He shot back, nudging your foot with his knee. “You’re boring.” 
“Boring?!” You muttered with defense, offended by the remark. “Take that back.” 
“Hmm…” he trailed off, squinting one of his eyes, blinded by the scorching sun. “No.” 
“You’re such an idiot.” You scoffed, stifling out a laugh. “Are you not going back in the water?”
“I am,” he exclaimed, now turned in your direction. “Can I borrow these real quick?”
“Borrow what?–” Your question was cut short, as Rafe’s hand came in view, not giving you a chance to process his action as he snatched the sunglasses off, causing you to yelp with surprise. “What the hell?!”
“Oh, these are nice.” He mumbled, adjusting them around the bridge of his nose. “A bit small, but ‘s fine.” 
“You’re stretching them out!” You gasped, reaching for them back, merely for the boy to dodge your hand, tilting his head down with a mischievous grin smeared all over. “C’mon, Rafe, don’t be like this.” 
“Like what?” He cocked his head to the side, observing you through his now tinted vision. 
“Rafe!!” You cried out, fully sitting up now. “I spent my hard earned money on these, I’ll kill you if they break.”
“Your hard earned money?” He repeated, further teasing you with his comments. 
“Okay, my dad got them for me, but–” you started, growing a bit embarrassed at the admission. 
“I’ll give them back,” he hummed, taking them off and folding them in place. “Only if you join me, though.” 
“I’m not going in the water.” You refused, dismissing his attempt with a nod of disbelief. 
“Why not?!” He cooed, “Come on, it'll be fun.” 
“Are you crazy?” You clicked your tongue against the roof of your mouth. “I’m not getting my hair wet.” 
“Please?” He further pleaded, jutting his lips into a pout. “Ryan left, who am I gonna be with, now that he’s gone?”
Your head shifted back to the water, merely to confirm his statement. And true to his words, Ryan was no longer in sight, having probably disappeared back into the house in the short while you and Rafe were arguing. 
“Hang out with the rest.” You shot back, addressing your friends, as they messed around with each other. “They’ll keep you company.” 
“Have you seen them?” Rafe’s face twisted with disgust, his lips forming into a frown. “They’re eating each other’s faces, God knows what they’re doing in that water.”
“Okay, that’s enough.” You replied, disregarding his statement, and looking past the last sentence he muttered. You saw your chance, and took it, contemplating before you snatched the pair of glasses from his hold, muffling your next words with haste. “I’ll kill you next time you steal my stuff.” 
“Is that a yes?” Rafe perked up with excitement, taking your silence as a yes before he shot up, instantly offering you a hand. “Let’s go.” 
“What?” You angled your head back, locking your gaze with his, slightly taken aback by the hand he offered. “I don’t recall agreeing to this…”
“Well, you’re obligated to join me now; don’t give me false hope then back down when I urge you to do it.” He started, his words somehow foreshadowing a deeper meaning to the teasing statement. Rafe bent down, just enough to take his hand in yours before he pulled you up, a screech of surprise rattling out of your throat. 
“Rafe!” You chanted with disbelief, stumbling over your own feet in the process of running, unable to catch up with Rafe, who hurried his way to the water. “Slow down!”
He replied with a chuckle, a rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins as the water touched your feet, engulfing your legs with each step you took, halting when it was just above your knees. 
“Wait– fuck, it’s cold.” You started, hands grabbing Rafe’s forearm for support, a mere attempt to stop him. And it did, with the boy pausing to steal a glimpse in your direction. “Let me get used to the water temperature.” 
“You’ll get used to it in no time.” He rolled his eyes, though he slowed down his pace, walking leisurely for you to adjust to the cold. 
Rafe chuckled as a wave came crashing against your bare torso, stiffening in your spot as a shiver ran down your spine, causing goosebumps to break out across your arms. A deep sigh tumbled past your parted lips, finger nails practically digging into Rafe’s arms everytime a wave would hit. 
Your friends greeted you from afar, not questioning the fact that you were alone with Rafe, a big distance separating you from the rest. Deep down, you speculated the fact that they knew, choosing to avoid the topic every time Sarah would ask about Rafe, or whether there was any progress in whatever you had; which you’d dismiss, telling her it was nothing. 
“Can we stop here?” You questioned, when the water barely reached your chin, now standing on your tippy toes to keep yourself steady with the flowing water. 
“Here?” Rafe repeated, brows knitting with confusion. “Why, are you scared?” 
“Slightly, yeah.” You admitted, pursing your lips into a thin line to avoid water from entering your mouth. “This is the deepest I’ve been without a life jacket.”
“Wait, you’re serious?” Rafe’s expression coiled with concern. 
You nodded, angling your head up, not risking how rocky the waves get. 
“Don’t worry,” Rafe suddenly spoke, earning your attention when his arm sneaked around your waist, ceasing some of the distance separating you from him. “I got you.” 
“Nope, that’s it, I’m getting out.” You muttered, turning in his arms, in an attempt to walk back out, merely for Rafe to tighten his hold around you, with your back now pressing firmly to his broad chest. 
Your breath caught in your throat, suddenly very aware of his presence, and the mess you got yourself into. For some reason, this felt oddly intimate, despite the boy’s pure intentions, striving to convince you to continue on with him, in spite of you refusing to. 
“I’ll hold you.” His voice dropped barely above a whisper, turning you back around, all while keeping himself steady. “Don’t be scared.”
“But I am scared,” you replied, emphasizing the ‘am’ in the process. “Sure, I know how to swim, but what if you get a cramp, and I try to save you, then both of us drown?” 
“Come on, I’ll be your life jacket.” He grinned, deliberately dragging you deeper into the water. “Are you doubting my skills?”
“That’s not what I’m saying.” You uttered, eyes widening when your feet could no longer reach the ground. “My parents will kill you if something happens to me, I swear to god.” 
“Then I’d have to get rid of both of us.” He joked, halting when you were far enough from the shore, stilling you with the arm sturdy around your waist. “How is that? Wanna go deeper?” 
“No!” You quickly shot back, hands flying to his shoulders, holding onto them to keep yourself from sinking. “This is good.” 
“If you say so.” He chuckled, ignoring the way his pulse quickened when your hands made contact with the skin around his shoulders, your nails lightly dragging over the flesh. He rubbed soothing circles to your side, the gesture a mere attempt to ease you up. “Relax, nothing is gonna happen to you.” 
“I’m relaxed.” You lied through your teeth, avoiding Rafe’s gaze, and instead admiring the view surrounding the rocky path leading to the mountains. “It’s so pretty from here.”
“It is.” Rafe mumbled, attention fixed on you. “Super pretty.”
Your lips tugged into a smile at his words, head shifting back in his direction, where he was shamelessly staring at you, not even failing to hide it. You dusted your face with your fingers, flashing Rafe a confused look, as to question why his gaze burned through you. 
“Is there something on my face?” You asked, coming to a halt when he shook his head. “Then what is it?” 
“Nothing,” he stifled out a laugh, the corner of his lips curling into a smirk. “You’re jus’ pretty.” 
“What?” You choked through a breath, growing flustered from the sudden compliment. “What was that for?” 
“What?” Rafe’s tongue darted out, coating his lips with a glossy layer of spit. “I said, you’re pretty. Is that not allowed?” 
“Shut up.” You shoved his shoulder, laughing off your embarrassment, though your ears burned with heat. 
“You know,” Rafe swallowed, admiring your surroundings. “I heard there were sharks in this area.” 
“What? Where?” You shouted, heartbeat quickening as panic settled in. “Don’t fuck with me, Rafe!”
“I thought you liked sharks.” His voice lowered with suspicion, eyebrows arching in a teasing manner. 
“Not as they’re about to fucking eat me.” You replied, fully ceasing the distance as you wrapped your arms around Rafe’s neck, pressing your chest close to his. “Get me out of here.” 
Rafe took your horror as a chance, the hand on your waist trailing up your back, until it settled just beneath your bikini top. “Relax, it was a joke.” 
Your head turned to face him, ready to scold him before you noticed how close he was, nose tulling to brush over yours. A shaky exhale stuttered out of your throat, shivers running down your spine when you caught Rafe’s gaze flickering to your lips, the action so subtle, you would’ve looked past it if he wasn’t mere inches away. 
Rafe’s lips slightly parted, tongue fidgeting with the roof of his mouth, fingers squeezing around your side, striving to hold himself back, and not kiss you right then in there. You were close, a little too close for comfort, he wanted nothing but to fuck the barrier Ryan created for you two, dive in and hope for the best. 
His thoughts were interrupted when you shoved his shoulders, eyebrows furrowing as your lips jut into a pout, one evidently displaying your distress. “That wasn’t funny! Why would you joke about that?!” 
“Chill, I’m messing with you.” Rafe snickered, eyes glued to your face, well aware he’d betray himself if he let his gaze wander past your neck. 
“By telling me I’ll get eaten to death by sharks?!” You huffed, pausing as you angled your head to the side. “Wait– how’d you know I like sharks?”
“I have my ways.” He cooed, pupils dilating with glint. 
“Mhm, yeah right.” You rolled your eyes, figuring it was either Sarah, or your brother. “Let’s head back.” 
“But we just got here!” Rafe protested. 
“I don’t trust you.” You defensively shot back, shuffling around in his hold. 
Rafe chuckled, abiding to your order. He swam back, with you clinging to him for dear life, not daring to risk it and let go. Though, of course, that wasn’t the end, as Rafe suddenly froze, groaning while his face twisted in pain. 
“What’s wrong?” You immediately asked, concern washing over your expression. 
“I think– fuck.” He groaned, arms loosening around your waist. “I think my leg is cramping.”
“Wait what?” You frowned at his statement, eyes widening with shock when his figure disappeared out of sight, suddenly struggling to level himself with you. “Are you serious, oh my god, should I call for help?!” 
You nearly submerged under water when your arms reached for the latter, struggling to drag him up as he sailed down, your hold the only thing keeping him from sinking further into the deep sea. 
Wasn’t it easy to drag weights in the water? So, why was it so difficult to get Rafe to the surface?
“Don’t fucking drown on me, Rafe, please.” You muttered with frustration, heart welling with fear, as your vision blurred, the corner of your eyes brimmed with tears. “Somebody help! Please! It’s an eme–”
Your words cut short when Rafe came in sight, water splashing everywhere with the force of him exiting the water. Your mouth gaped to speak, met with utter silence in return, observing as Rafe chuckled at your reaction, feigning ignorance to your panicked state. 
“Did that get you?” He erupted into a fit of giggles, wiping the water from his eyes. 
“Are you serious?” Your tone washed with disbelief, heartbeat so loud you could hear it thumping through your ears. “Why would you joke about that?”
“Take a joke, it’s not that serious.” He stated, the smile smeared on his lips fading when he noticed how upset you visibly looked. 
“A joke is supposed to be funny, dickhead.” You fluttered your eyes, unable to manage the tears rolling down your face. “What if something actually happened to you?” 
“Wait, are you crying?” His breath hitched as he let realization sink in, chest swelling with discomfort at the consequences of his actions. You weakly punched his torso, fleeing from the touch when Rafe attempted to inch closer to you. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
His hands cupped your face, resting just above the curve of your jaw as his thumb wiped away your tears, now mixed with salt-water. He repeatedly rubbed his finger over your cheeks, striving to calm you down with the subtle gesture. 
“It won’t happen again,” he started, tilting your head with the hands engulfing your face. “I didn’t think you’d take it so seriously.” 
“Whatever,” you dismissed his apology, though deep down it softened your heart. “It still wasn’t funny, I was scared you’d actually die.” 
Rafe’s lips twitched into a smile at your statement, unable to contain the laughter bubbling through his chest. You looked absolutely adorable, leaving him speechless as his action spoke for his affection. He moved forward, leveling your head down before he ceased the distance between you two, and capturing your lips in a soft peck that lasted a near of five seconds.  
Your body stiffened at the gesture, so taken aback you almost choked on your own spit in the process. The plush of his lips brushing over yours felt like feathers, as the warmness of his mouth engulfed your skin. It made you yearn for time to stop, enjoy this while it lasted, even if it was for a short moment. 
“There, it’s completely my fault.” He whispered once he pulled back, face mere inches away from yours, you could feel his breath fanning over your nose. “Does that make up for it?” 
Your gaze seeked his blue eyes through the small distance separating you, finger nails lightly grazing over his arms. Silence heaved the air, as the atmosphere filled with unresolved tension you’ve both been avoiding for the past few days, weeks, even. 
Rafe kissed you, and it’s not some stupid joke to get you riled up, or mess around for a reaction out of you. He did it because he wanted to, completely looking over the fact that you were his best friend’s sister, let alone someone he craved in the dimness of the night, somewhere hidden, where no one would judge him for it.  
Rafe has been dying to confront you about the kiss, turning into a giddy mess every time he would reminisce over the memory of your lips softly brushing over the corner of his mouth. And though it was small, barely a peck, it drove him insane. 
That night, Rafe chose to ignore the guilt rising through his chest as he got off to the thought of you; being able to touch you though he knew you were far out of his reach, not for his gaze to admire. His chest burned with forbidden desire, growing aroused every time he caught you in none but your sheer sleeping shorts, covering nothing and leaving little to the imagination. 
“You know,” Rafe muttered through a ragged breath, “About that ni–”
The palm of your hand instantly found Rafe’s mouth, covering it before he could further speak. You knew exactly what he was planning to say, but you weren’t ready. Not right now, still flustered by the kiss he so casually planted to your lips. 
Addressing the kiss from three nights ago in the middle of the water, mind you, in an area secluded from everyone else? Yeah, no. That wasn’t quite what you had in mind, Rafe left you no choice but to shut him out. 
“Hmm?” You hummed, trying to change the topic.
“What?” Rafe muffled, lips barely moving due to your hand covering his mouth.
“We should leave,” you fluttered your eyes at him, “The sun is setting.”
“Right,” he spoke, eyes shifting down to your digits yet engulfing his chin. “You can let go of me now.”
“Oh,” you swiftly retrieved your hand, clearing your throat as you turned around to avoid meeting his gaze. “Sorry.” 
“It’s alright,” Rafe scoffed, following in your steps as you struggled to swim back, breaking into a grin when your arms pushed through the water, slightly splashing the latter with the gesture. “Here, let me help you.” 
“I’m good!” You dismissed the suggestion, letting out a sigh of relief when your feet eventually reached the ground, ultimately approaching a safer zone. “I can handle myself.”
Rafe’s giggles seeped through the silence, watching with a glint of amusement as you aimed for the shore, running your way back to the house when you did so. You gave him no chance to confront you about the situation, though the suspense was killing you, it was just not the right time, nor a good place to do it. 
Freaking out felt like an understatement for your emotions, letting out a silent scream as soon as you approached your room. Fuck, this wasn’t the first time you’ve been kissed, so why did it feel like you were in middle school, sneaking around the playground to kiss your crush? 
It was humiliating, to say the least. Rafe kissed you, and it did nothing but make you grow more fond of him, increasing your affection for him. Butterflies seeped through your stomach, unable to suppress the smile forming on your lips, letting yourself go now that you’re alone. 
Your shower filled with giddiness, as you sang along to the lyrics playing in the background, too caught up with the act to realize you’ve spent the majority of the evening in there. You continued getting ready, doing your skincare, and technically everything you would do on an everything-shower day. 
A loud ping caught your attention as your gaze trailed down to your phone, eyebrows knitting with puzzlement when it continued buzzing with notifications. You adjusted the pearl necklace around your neck, fastening your pace when curiosity got the best of you, as you instantly aimed for your phone, heart skipping a beat when you read the contact name of the sender. 
It was from Rafe, multiple messages, at that. 
rafe 👍: Hey
rafe 👍: Come eat
rafe 👍: We got takeout 🥡 
A laugh bubbled out of your throat at the emoji, the invitation silly, yet tempting. 
You: im not hungry! go ahead and eat without me :)
rafe 👍: No
You: boy… wdym no 
rafe 👍: Come down and eat
Your eyes quirked with suspicion, puzzled over why he was insisting despite you refusing. 
You: did you poison my food
You: why are you insisting…
rafe 👍: Damn… I can't even invite you to eat without you making me out to be a dick
You: i mean you are what you eat 😇
rafe 👍:😐 Quit it
You: mb boo
You: is this a date
Rafe’s bubble appeared and disappeared off the screen, the amount of time he took concerning you for a moment. 
rafe 👍: Could be one
rafe 👍: Only if you want it to be
Your fingers hesitantly hovered over the keyboard, staring at the message, as if doing that would make the keen in his statement disappear. You swallowed around your dry throat, setting your phone down, merely to process your emotions. 
A date. 
He can’t say shit like this and expect you not to like him. 
At this point, he was playing with your feelings, and that thought alone had your heart breaking to pieces. It’s only been a month, and yet, you were this infatuated with him. Bearing to cross the line for Rafe spoke to you like no other, breaking the unspoken boundaries you set for each other. 
You don’t know when it started, from lingering gazes turned into subtle touches, eventually oscillated to heated moments smeared with desire. Wanting each other, not being able to do anything about it because it was wrong. It all fuzzed up your brain. 
Rafe was testing you, with each time he threw a hint in your direction. Hell, he should know not to confuse you, as he already went down the rabbit hole of why he couldn't date you, with Ryan warning him every time he’d joke about being into you. 
Enjoying it wouldn't hurt, right? Choosing to push the guilt down and let your heart bloom with joy every time Rafe is around was okay, right? Because it’s human nature, how were you supposed to ignore him when his mere presence was so tempting, making you nothing but crave him more. 
Guilt was temporary, but regretting this? It was going to haunt you forever, tulling you with decisions you hesitated to commit, afraid they would hurt others, fully abandoning how you felt. Those were your emotions, though, your needs, you had every right to take the risk. 
With that, you typed a playful ‘shut up’ back, before heading downstairs, instantly letting puzzlement settle in when you spotted only JJ and Kiara, sitting along with Rafe, who perked up at the sound of your steps.
“Where’s the others?” You questioned, wrapping Kiara in a swift embrace, before you seated yourself next to her. 
“John B and Sarah went out for dinner, and I saw Ryan leave with your dad.” She explained, chewing down the mouthful of food. “I have no idea where Pope and Cleo are, though.” 
“Oh, they said they’re grabbing booze.” JJ stifled out a laugh, eyebrows quirking in a teasing meaning. 
“For what?!” You asked, offering Rafe a tight-lipped smile when he passed you your plate. 
“Shut up, JJ.” Kiara rolled her eyes, fixing her attention back on you. “He’s messing, don’t listen to him.” 
“I’m not lying–” his words cut short when Kiara kicked his knee, the gesture earning a breathy grunt out of the latter. “What was that for?” 
“To keep your mouth shut.” The girl replied, forcing a fake beam across her lips. 
Rafe snorted as they continued bickering throughout the whole time you joined them. He flashed you an apologetic smile, not aware of the chaos awaiting you two. Fortunately, JJ and Kiara excused themselves once they were done, informing you they’d be chilling by the shore for the night, leaving you all alone with Rafe.
The air heaved with tension, the atmosphere filling with unspoken confessions you both oughted to address. Rafe’s been full, using the food as an excuse to enjoy your presence for a little longer. 
“‘You ignorin’ me?” Rafe started, scraping his fork against the veggie pieces splayed on the plate. 
“What?” You shot back, frowning at the sudden assumption. “Why would you think that?”
“Well, it’s just that,” he tilted his head to the side, putting the utensil in his hold down. “You seem uncomfortable.”
“Well, I’m not.” You mimicked, playfully rolling your eyes. “Besides, we don’t even speak for me to ignore you.” 
“Yeah, you’re right.” He nodded his head, gaze glued to his arm plopped on the table. “You’d rather kiss me instead.”
“What?” A choked cough barely exits your throat, eyes widening with shock over Rafe’s statement. That caught you off guard, even more when Rafe maintained a blank expression, offering you a glass of water to down the rest of your food. 
“Are you okay?” He asked, “Do you need more water?” 
“Why would you bring that up?” You brushed off his concern, his words echoing over and over in the back of your brain. 
“You kissed me,” he repeated himself, stating the obvious. “Did you not?” 
“I did, but–” you stammered, face flushing with heat. “I didn’t mean to?–”
“You grabbed my face, leaned forward, then proceeded to kiss me.” He muttered, reminiscing back to the memory. “What about that did you not mean?” 
“It was a mistake!” You hurried to respond, stumbling over your own words in the process. “I was drunk, out of my mind–”
“Oh, so it’s a mistake?” He snorted, straightening up in his seat. “You go around kissing people when you’re drunk?” 
“Okay, why are you being a dick?” Your nose scrunched with frustration, exploding in the latter’s face. “And if I do? Then what, you’re gonna do something about it?”
“I’m trying to make sense of the situation here,” he shot back, his arm moving in front of his chest. “I’m not fucking around, okay? I’ve been dying to speak to you, but you never gave me a chance to explain myself.” 
“What’s there to explain, Rafe?” Your voice lowered in tone, taken aback by how fast the conversation took a turn. “I’m like Sarah, huh? Then you go n’ fuckin’ kiss me?”
“Why are you switching the–”
“No, let’s discuss the incident from earlier, since we’re fucking talking.” You cut him off, jaw clenching to prevent yourself from breaking down. “You keep pulling these stunts on me– first in the grocery store, then in the car, and earlier in the water– what is it that you want? You know Ryan won’t be happy if he found out, so why do you keep– why do you keep fucking confusing me, Rafe?” 
“I–” Rafe’s words caught in his throat, hands clenching into fists. 
“Forget it.” You clicked your teeth, grabbing your phone as you stood to your feet, streaking your way past Rafe, with the intentions of reaching the stairs. 
Rafe called out your name, voice breaking with despair. “Where are you going?”
The way your name rolled off his tongue made your heart skip a beat, letting your eyes force shut as you feigned glancing back, afraid you’d give in if you caught sight of his expression. 
You entered one of the guest bathrooms, locking the door behind you before you immediately dialed Cleo’s number, impatiently clicking your fingers over the phone as you waited for the girl to pick up. 
A sigh of relief escaped your throat when she did, a bit of shuffling going on her end. 
“Hey Cleo,” you muttered through a breath, taking a deep inhale, as your thumb pressed to your bottom lip. “I– sorry, I know you’re out with Pope, I jus’ really needed to talk to someone and I–”
“Hey, it’s okay.” Cleo spoke, interrupting your rambling. “Take a deep breath, I’m not going anywhere, I’ll be here.” 
“Okay,” you nodded, though she couldn’t see you, obliging to her orders. “Sorry, fuck–”
“Why are you apologizing, girl?” She shot back, attempting to soothe away your worries. “Now slowly, tell me what’s bothering you.” 
“I kind of, uhm…” you trailed off, fidgeting with the ring hugging your finger. “I fucked up, Cleo. I got ahead of myself, and ruined everything.” 
“No you didn’t.” Cleo assured, “What happened? Don’t panic, okay? Everything will be alright.” 
“Alright, I didn’t mean to keep this from you, I thought it would be a fleeing moment, but I guess not?–” You hesitated, nervously biting your lip as you prepared yourself for the confession. “I kissed Rafe, and while it was somewhat, he tried to confront me about it, and I panicked!” 
“Okay, woah, woah.” Cleo uttered, disbelief visible through her tone. “When did that happen?” 
“Three days ago, after the party.” You huffed, angling your head back with a pout. “I’m such an idiot, why am I acting like something happened between us? I lashed out on him and stormed off, what if he regrets it?” 
“Well, you’re the one who kissed him.” Cleo clarified, “Why would he regret it?” 
“Actually– something sort of happened earlier…” you mumbled, clearing your throat. 
“Don’t tell me he fucking kissed you, Bug.” Cleo took a guess, making you freeze in your spot, not denying her suspicions. “He did? What the hell, and you didn’t say anything?” 
“Listen, I barely got time to process it, I was planning on telling you eventually.” A sigh stuttered out of your throat, crying out loud. “I’m so dumb, why did I get mad at him? It’s not even his fault!” 
“Calm down, baby, it will be alright.” Cleo secured, “I’m sure he understands, this is probably bothering him as well.” 
“What if he thinks I’m childish?” You questioned, “I felt so guilty, Cleo, I don’t want his friendship with Ryan to fall apart ‘cause of me.” 
“That won’t happen, trust me.” Cleo advised, her tone soft. “It’s obvious that you’re both attracted to each other, Ryan will have to accept it, he can’t interfere jus’ cause he doesn’t want you dating his friends.” 
“But he’s right,” your shoulders relaxed with disappointment, already imagining the scenery Ryan would put out. “And Rafe doesn’t like me, trust, I’m like ninety-nine percent sure he doesn’t.” 
“Ninety-nine?” Cleo cooed, earning a chuckle out of you. “Okay, come on, have you seen him? Pope told me about what happened on the way back, don’t tell me this man is not head over heels for you.” 
“Why’s Pope snitching?!” You scoffed, sniffling as you rolled your eyes. “Okay, maybe he might like me, he keeps dropping hints, but I don’t know?” 
“What hints?” Cleo’s tone glinted with curiosity, waiting for you to further speak. 
“He texted me earlier, and I was messing around but instead of brushing it off he went with the flow?” You explained, your words coming off as a question. “Maybe I’m misreading the situation, but let’s say he did like me, then what? What do we do, will we keep things a secret because of Ryan?” 
“Why are you thinking about that?” Cleo giggled, ridiculed by how much you were overthinking this. “Enjoy it, okay? You like him, go for it, don’t hold back.” 
“And if he doesn’t like me?” You stifled out a laugh, leisurely fluttering your eyes shut. “I don’t know, it started off as a joke, but I’m starting to for real like him, Cleo. I’ve never felt this way about someone before.” 
“Okay, there you go, you got your answer.” Cleo chanted, making you shake your head. “Now, I don’t mean to be nosy, but it’s your fault for mentioning it.” 
“God, what is it?” You rolled your eyes, already expecting what she was about to say.
“What did he say in those messages?” She asked, earning a chuckle out of you, as you moved the phone from your ear, already pulling up Rafe’s contact. 
You screenshotted the conversation, Cleo’s voice muffling through the speakers of your phone, her words fully incoherent. “Hold on, I can’t hear you.
Cleo remained silent, waited while you cropped the screenshot, before bringing the phone back to your ear. “Alright, what did you say?” 
“I said hurry up!” She chimed back. 
“Okay, someone’s curious.” You teased, pressing on the photo icon, before you selected the image and sent it over, waiting for Cleo to receive it. “There.” 
“You sent it?” She asked, humming as she pulled up your messages. “I don’t see anything.” 
“What? But I sen– oh.” you halted as you let realization kick in, immediately reaching for your phone, hoping your suspicions might be wrong. “Fuck, Cleo, I sent it to Rafe.”
An audible gasp escaped Cleo’s lips at the statement, words going unnoticed as Rafe’s text bubble appeared on the screen, not giving you a chance to delete it before he saw it. 
rafe 👍: ???
“Oh my God, he saw it.” You whispered, “Wait, let me go back to my room.” 
You creaked the door open, instantly shutting it when Rafe came in sight, heart thumping loud with panic. Your eyes widened a bit, when footsteps echoed through your ears, knowing the owner behind the noises.  
“He’s heading upstairs,” you informed Cleo in a hushed tone, “What do I do?” 
“Where are you?” She asked.
“I’m in the upstairs bathroom, the one down the hallway.” 
“Okay, wait ‘till he leaves, then go back to your room.” 
You nodded, even if the girl couldn’t see you, too nauseous to comprehend normal words out. Hell, that probably weirded him out, what will he think now? 
However, despite how nervous you grew, Cleo stayed on call, assuring you that it would be alright, even though you knew deep down, it wasn’t. 
“Alright, I’ll go now, it’s quiet,” You sighed, breath shaky with anxiousness. “We’ll talk when you’re back, I’m sorry for taking up your time.” 
“Are you sure?” Cleo questioned with concern, “I can stay on call until we’re back, I don’t mind.” 
“No it’s okay,” you insisted, “Besides, I’m tired, I’ll see about this tomorrow, it’s too much to process right now.” 
“Alright,” Cleo exhaled, “Let me know if you need anything, we’ll be back in a bit.” 
You bid your goodbyes, putting your phone down as you aimed for the door, peaking your head out to check whether the coast was clear. Your shoulders relaxed when Rafe was nowhere in sight, tippy toeing your way back to your room, making sure to be as careful as physically possible. 
Barely escaping the situation, your heart sank to your stomach when you unlatched the doorknob, now greeted with Rafe seated on the edge of your bed, perking up when you made your presence known. 
“What are you doing here?” You mumbled, feeling your throat run dry. 
You wanted the ground to split and swallow you whole, unable to bear the embarrassment of facing Rafe, now a few feet away from you. 
“You know…” He trailed off, getting up with a groan. “I was plannin’ to give you space, talk things out when you’re ready, but…”
Your fingers clutched to the doorknob when Rafe walked in your direction, towering over you and cornering you against the door, as it leisurely closed within each step you took back. 
“God, you’re killing me.” He whispered, gulping as his gaze flickered to your parted lips, coated with a faint layer of spit.
His fingers toyed with the hem of your shirt, hesitating before pressing his hand to your hip, his hold burning holes through your flesh. Your eyes remained on his face, watching as his expression changed into something serious, stirring up your insides with a rush of adrenaline.
You stiffened under the touch, slightly taken aback by the bold move, even as your body leaned into it, chasing after the sensation of his fingers marking your skin. , 
“You know how much you’re affecting me, don’t you?” He hushed out, digits dragging up your side, and tumbling just beneath the material, his touch welcoming the warmness of your skin. “The amount of times I had to control myself, and respect the boundaries I set with Ryan.” 
“Rafe.” Your tone lowered to match his, an inaudible gasp exiting your parted lips when he pinned you to the door, fingers squeezing the plush of your flesh. “What are you doing?” 
Rafe stuck to answering with his actions, bringing his other hand to your face, and taking the curve of your jaw in between his fingers. His thumb pressed to your chin, using it to angle your head up, striving to study your face up close. 
“You’re breathtaking, you know that?” He whispered, smearing your glossed lips with his thumb, the gesture causing you to part your mouth in a sigh. “God, you know how difficult it was? Telling myself you’re off limits; when you’re all I think about, twenty-four, seven; always on mind.” 
“You’re ridiculous.” You exhaled through your mouth, vision going blurry as Rafe leaned his forehead against yours, his hot breath fanning above the bridge of your nose. “We shouldn’t be doing this, Rafe.” 
“I was barely holding myself back,” He muttered, trailing light, open-mouthed kisses to your lips. “It’s your,” a kiss, “fault,” and another, “for tempting,” he paused, “me.”
That was the only sign you needed as you moved forward, letting your guilt wash with new found desire when you captured Rafe’s lips in an eager kiss you’ve both been dying for.
Rafe’s arms sneaked to your sides, locking you in place as he ceased the distance separating you two, though that felt impossible, as he licked and nipped at your lips, suddenly feeling drunk on your sweetness. 
You tasted amazing, way better than what Rafe had imagined, leaving him craving more as he angled your head to the side, with the intent of deepening the kiss. 
In that moment, you didn’t care whether this was a dream, or reality. In fact, you wanted to wake up the next morning with the same giddiness filling your insides, Rafe being the reason behind it. 
You wanted Rafe, the kiss merely proving the yearn tulling your insides, till you no longer were able to bear it. 
Fuck it, you chose to take the risk, let yourself enjoy this while it lasts, knowing that eventually, you’d need to put an end to it; hence Rafe is off limits.
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a/n all support is v much appreciated! pulling my hair out i forgot how to write. SORRY ik i didnt do the kiss justice but i just wanted to get the kiss out of the way... dont get bored of me yet i promise theres so much more to squeeze in the next four chapters theyre just entering their situationship era 🙈 ALSO IK I SAID THERE WILL BE TEXTS BUT I LIED next one 100% though!!! anyways yeah i hope you enjoyed, lmk ur thoughts!!!
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TAGLIST @greyswaren @slut-4-gojo @depthsofdespairr @littlelamy @lilithblackkk @cnnamongrl @mattyskies @percysley @jaklvbub @inlovewithdob @ilovefiction4lmen @theeternaloptimistt @maybejj @icaqttt @idgasb @purplerose291 @shincidios @laniirackssss @malibuhearts @adulterated-cocaine @bugg06 @murdockcastleslut @drwstarkeys @pretymads @klmaaaoooo @wearemadeofstardust0 @urbrunettebombshell @stylestarkey @riverxsq @louxmcl @totalswag @cl4uus @simpforboys @tearsfromasliverwolf-blog @bilssturns @fandomhopped @strsdoulikedem @congratsloserr @dr3wstarkey @xoxo-ada @stvrligghtt @rafeswhoooreee @kythefangirl25 @chaneydoll @blushmimi @akobx @empath-bunny @flirtism @stopnala @rafecameronswifeyy
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multicohn · 4 months ago
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summary: the rookies notice that their partner is missing from an important race and immediately thinks the worst
warnings: this took me DAYS to do 💀 some might be longer than others but keep in mind that i do like all the rookies and some were just easier to write for — ooc? since i don't know them that well, some might have similar situations but i tried to not have them as the same scenario — missing or misspelled words maybe? i might have missed it cause this is quite long — drivers wanting to die / thinking their s/o died ( jokingly ) — death jokes in general — just the rookies being dramatic and thinking the worse
pairing(s): gn! reader x jack doohan, gn! reader x isack hadjar, gn! reader x ollie bearman, gn! reader x kimi antonelli, gn! reader x gabriel bortoleto ( all written separately )
genre: fluff, dramtic drivers, established relationships
author note: lawson and alonso are not included
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jack doohan - australian grand prix
the first race of the season would be in jack’s home country. he felt excited, but also very nervous. jack wanted to prove that he deserves to be a main driver and that he can pull in results. sure, it’s only the first race, but if he doesn’t prove that he deserved that seat, he’ll be dropped quick.
jack bit his nails as he stood in the garage. he made it into the second round of qualifying, but was easily knocked down the longer it went.
was he upset? yes, but y/n made him see that it wasn't his fault.
now, however, jack hasn't seen y/n since that morning.
he's aware that they're most likely with pierre's girlfriend, kika, but they haven't answered any of his texts either. pierre wasn't worried, use to kika not coming until a few minutes before he had get in the car or she just came and go.
jack wasn't use to it though. y/n normally popped in to see him or at least texted him back.
did their phone die? break? is franco trying to steal them before stealing his seat? ARE THEY BEING THREATENED BY ESHAY'S?
"jack"
nevermind.
“y/n!” jack shouted in relief as they walked towards him
“sorry” they quickly kissed his cheek as kika walked away to do the same with pierre
“kika’s heel broke so we had to go get her a new pair of shoes and my phone went flat”
jack breathed out a sigh of relief before engulfing their partner in a hug.
"i thought i was going to die" y/n rolled their eyes
"i've always made it on time”
“yeah, well, i thought franco was trying something or that you were being threatened by an eshay” y/n nodded while trying not to laugh at the thought of jack thinking an eshay was trying to have a go at them
“i’ll make sure to remember to bring my portable” jack pouted at their words
“no. you’re not allowed to leave me at all on race days”
“what if i need to go toilet?"
"i'll stand outside"
"you can not be serious..."
jack placed his hands on their shoulders and stared right into their eyes.
"dead serious" y/n scoffed and started swatting him away.
"get in the car!"
"you haven't given me a good luck kiss yet!"
"you aren't getting one!"
"oh so you want me to crash?"
"jack!"
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isack hadjar - japanese grand prix
the sound of someone texting him made isack momentarily snap out of his trance and look down. a smile creeped onto his face as the familiar contact name of his partner sat at the top, but it slowly washed off his face as he read through their messages.
loml <3: baby im here!
loml <3: there’s lots of people
loml <3: they have ( favourite food )!
loml <3: hey so…
loml <3: i think im lost.
they hadn't been at the previous races due to conflicts with their own personal schedule, but had reassured him that they would be able to make it for this race and would be by his side for bahrain as well. isack had cheered when they revealed the news after friday's practice sessions ended.
y/n had landed a few hours ago, but isack was already making his way to the track when they did ( he had been dragged and strapped into the car by his manager because isack tried to run off to the airport ).
“isack?” his trainer knocked on the door and called out to him before opening it
“you good, mate?” isack only stared at his phone, his race suit still hanging around his waist
isack took a deep breath in and spun around.
his trainer blinked as he brushed past him, determination obvious. however, isack was walking away from the garage.
"wha — isack?! that's the wrong way!"
"no it isn't!"
the trainer quickly caught up to him and grabbed hold of isack's shoulder. the driver turned around, his determination had slipped and fear seemed to have consumed isack.
“what’s wrong?”
“my partner got lost"
"oh, well..." his trainer had no clue on how to comfort the driver who was trying to pull himself away
"at least they're here?" isack whipped around so fast that it startled his trainer
"that doesn't matter! they aren't with me! i can't race knowing they're not here waiting for me! what if they fell into a ditch and died or something!?"
he watched as his trainer opened his mouth to reply, but it fell on deaf ears as isack caught sight of y/n. he sprinted towards the garage, leaving his baffled trainer.
"y/n!" they didn't even have a chance to turn around before they felt isack crashing into their back, his arms tightly secured around them.
"i thought you fell into a ditch and died or something" y/n turned their head to stare at isack with an offended expression
"why was that your first thought?" isack didn't answer and continued to squeeze them tightly
( his trainer literally had to pull and carry him away from y/n so that he would get in the car )
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ollie bearman - british grand prix
despite their relationship still being relatively new, ollie found himself having "withdrawals" as kimi called it. he felt weird and itchy when y/n wasn’t by his side, but when they were ollie would just aimlessly follow them around. fans thought it was cute and started comparing him to a dog more than a bear.
however, ollie received devasting news on the day of the british grand prix.
they would be late.
ollie thought then and there that he should just die.
the young driver arrived at the paddock with sadness beneath his fake smile. he raced towards the garage, only gave short answers to those who questioned him about something or rushing through with signing something, barely having time for pictures. ollie didn't meant to come off as rude, but he really just wanted to curl up in his drivers room and wait for them, but he couldn't.
esteban who was hit with a sense of boredom wondered why he couldn't hear his teammate's usual chatter and when he peeked around the corner, all he saw is a pouting ollie.
"ollie? what's wrong?"
he mumbled an answer, but due to all the noise, esteban didn't hear a thing.
"what?" ollie huffed as he leaned closer to hear
"my partner isn't here"
he crossed his arms with an irritated expression while esteban glanced over at ollie's team who were all collectively ignoring the upset driver.
"they told me they were going to be late, but i didn't think it would be this late! what if they got into a car accident?!" he only had a few more minutes to spare before they would start forcing him into the car
esteban only nodded along as ollie continued to think the worse — he's certain he heard something about an alien abduction. the younger driver didn't even notice that his teammate had left halfway through until he spun around to see a tired looking y/n just walking in.
if ollie was a dog, his ears would’ve perked up and tail would be wagging.
“y/n!” he cheered before jumping them
thankfully, ollie had enough strength as to not let them fall over.
“ollie, you’re heavy, i can't breathe”
"you wouldn't be talking if you couldn't breathe" they groaned lightly as he pressed their bodies together
“why are you so late?”
“traffic”
“you should’ve ran” y/n scoffed
“yeah, don’t think so” ollie lifted his head from their ( neck / shoulder / chest — depends on height )
“do you… not love me enough?” his eyes widened at the thought while y/n stared silently at him, but that just made ollie grow even more nervous
“why aren’t you saying anything? do not love me anymore?!”
“ollie. get in the damn car”
“and now you’re trying to get rid of me?! y/n, i will cry”
“i don’t think your team will let me near you if you do”
“i’ll kill myself”
“ollie!”
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kimi antonelli - italian grand prix
kimi dislikes the word “possessive”. he isn’t possessive, he just doesn’t trust anyone around partner so they should stay by his side until he’s in the car and then stay beside someone he trusts while he races. that person was george’s girlfriend — carmen, but kimi’s hasn’t been liking her recently since she always stole them away.
y/n is HIS partner. how dare she keep them away from him.
carmen would pop up out of nowhere and take y/n away while george held him back from chasing them down. his partner would be returned before he had to get in the car, but that didn't matter to kimi, y/n should be with him the entire time unless they aren't allowed ( like meetings, but he was able to convince toto to let them in ).
kimi impatiently tapped his foot while george hummed to himself. he didn't speak, but kimi knew the older man was amused by the situation. would it be bad if he took george out right now? toto does favour him and valtteri is here, so it should be fine, right?
an evil glint sparkled in kimi's eyes that george was unaware of since his back was now turned.
"it's his fault for letting his girlfriend take away my partner" kimi nodded to himself as he glared at the taller man
however, he never got to initiate his plan.
"kimi"
"my purpose in life has been restored"
he sprinted towards his partner and snatched them away from carmen ( yes, kimi did glare at her, but she only laughed before going to george ).
“i hate when she does that” he scoffed before wrapping them in a tight squeeze
y/n wondered if their boyfriend was a snake in his past life by the way he hugged them.
“we just lost track of time” they managed to say, but kimi wasn’t having any of it
“you were almost late. i’m going to tie us together whenever she comes”
“you still have ten minutes”
“it would’ve been a hour, but noooo” y/n laughed and kimi finally loosened his hold on them
“sorry, sorry, i know important this race is to you” they threaded their fingers through his hair before pressing a quick kiss to kimi’s cheek
“is that all?”
“you got to put the rest of your stuff on”
“i’ll put it on when you kiss me properly”
“everyone’s looking…”
“y/n. i will not get into that car unless you kiss me”
they felt toto turn towards them and they cursed kimi quietly before pressing their lips to his.
kimi smiled happily and skipped off to put on the rest of his race gear.
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gabriel bortoleto - brazilian grand prix
this particular race weekend had been a huge deal for gabi and y/n is well aware of it. the driver felt bad about not being able to spend much time with their partner, but y/n understood and was able to keep themselves entertained without gabi.
“where are they?” he tapped his foot impatiently while staring at the empty hallway
practice and qualifying has gone well, the crowd went absolutely wild when he managed to push the car to p6, but then a few other drivers managed to get better times and that knocked him down to p10. gabi wasn’t upset about that though, what he is upset about is how his partner has seemingly disappeared the moment they arrived at the track.
sure, gabi does blame himself since he was instantly swept up with journalists and fans that seemed to increase every time someone left. y/n had given him a quick kiss before making their way to the sauber hospitality. gabi didn’t get to check in on them, at least physically, since he had a meeting and other duties to attend to before changing into his race suit. gabi didn’t think anything of it; they might have gone to get food or needed the bathroom.
but, this long? something must have happened.
he didn’t want to think the worst, but he couldn’t help it.
“how likely do you think someone here would be a kidnapper?” nico slowly turned towards gabi who stared at the wall, no thoughts seemingly behind the younger driver’s eyes
“what?” gabi blinked
“nothing” he tried to brush it off, but nico wasn’t having it
gabi sighed and started explain.
“maybe they ate something bad? or lost track of time?”
yeah, that seemed more reasonable than them being lured away and stuffed into a random van.
gabi thanked nico before wondering off back to his side of the garage.
"it's fine. maybe they did eat something bad or didn't realise how close the start time is — it's happened before..." he sighed and crossed his arms before closing his eyes
gabi drowned out the noise and envisioned himself on the track. it calmed his mind, but only slightly.
he didn't know much time had passed since he entered his own head, but gabi instantly recongised y/n the moment they were close enough. they always wear a certain ( perfume / cologne / spray, etc ) that gabi is all too familiar with, it helped that y/n is the only person he knows to wear it.
their arms wrapped around his ( waist / mid-section / shoulders ) and gabi opened his eyes and turned around.
"where were you?"
"i think i ate something weird"
a sigh slipped past his lips while his shoulders sunk in relief.
"at least weren't lured to a van and almost kidnapped"
"what?" gabi shook his head
"don't worry about it"
he pressed a soft kiss to their ( neck / cheek / forehead ) before walking away to grab his helmet. y/n stared at their boyfriend's back, confusion washing over them as they replied his words in their head.
"by the way..." with his helmet now in his hands, gabi walked back over to stand in front of them
"i'm going to handcuff us together if you leave like that again"
"gabi —" he cut them off with a kiss on the lips before quickly making his way to his car while putting on his helmet
y/n only sighed and rubbed their forehead.
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runningincircl3s · 3 months ago
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Sinematic
Vinny Mauro x Reader
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Chapter 8
chapter warnings: mentions of a vibrator lmao and flashbacks to sex (nothing too graphic!)
this chapter is a little all over the place i'm sorry!! i'm not sure if i'll post the next chapter (WHICH IM SOOOO EXCITED FOR BTW)(ONE OF MY FAVS I'VE WRITTEN FOR THIS STORY) early next week? i'm going to paris for the week with my best friend and we leave on monday night so i could post it in the morning? but ik i'll be lazy and post it on sunday instead hehe :) anyways happy monday!! <3
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Your head was pounding. Your mouth was dry. It hurt to open your eyes. 
You groaned, turning over, only to be met with something solid and warm beside you.
Oh god.
Your eyes snapped open, but the moment you moved, a sharp pain shot through your skull, forcing you to wince. You swallowed, your throat scratchy, before daring to peek over your shoulder.
Vinny?
He was still asleep, his curls a mess against the pillow, face relaxed and peaceful. His arm was draped loosely over his stomach, his breathing steady. The sheets had fallen down to his waist, exposing his bare stomach.
Was he even dressed?
Panic flared in your chest.
No. No, no, no, what did we do?
You tried to think back, but your memories were hazy, blurry around the edges. You remembered the movie, the shots, laughing way too much. But that’s where it ended. 
“Vin…”
“Mmm?”
“Are you awake?” 
“…No.”
Vinny stirred beside you, letting out a low groan before cracking one eye open. His gaze flickered to you, still tense beside him, and a slow, sleepy smirk spread across his lips.
“Morning, sunshine.” He rasped, voice thick with sleep.
You swallowed hard. 
“Vin…”
His smirk widened. 
“You look stressed.”
“Did we…?”
Vinny’s brows furrowed for a second before realisation hit, and he let out a soft laugh. 
“No, relax, we didn’t do anything.”
You exhaled sharply, relief washing over you. 
“Are you sure? Nothing happened between us?”
He chuckled again. 
“Yeah, I’m sure. Nothing happened between us, but something clearly happened between you and the tequila”. He chuckled, “No, you passed out on the couch so I brought you up. I was gonna leave, but you asked me to stay.”
“Oh.” You blinked, feeling your face heat up. “Right.”
Vinny stretched, groaning slightly. 
“You feeling okay?”
“No,” you grumbled. “I feel like I got hit by a bus.”
“Yeah, well, that’s what happens when you try to keep up with AJ’s drinking games.”
You rolled onto your back, staring at the ceiling. 
“Shit. What time is it?”
Vinny grabbed his phone from the nightstand, squinting at the screen. 
“Almost ten.”
Your heart sank. 
“Shit!” You bolted upright, immediately regretting it as your head throbbed in protest. “I have a photoshoot at eleven!”
Vinny frowned. 
“You sure you’re feeling up for that?”
“I have to be,” you groaned, swinging your legs over the side of the bed, rubbing your temples. “I already rescheduled once. Plus, I need the money.”
Vinny sat up behind you, watching as you scrambled for your phone. 
“Is it really that big a deal?”
“Yes, Vin, it is a big deal. I need the money. I’m already behind on rent, I can’t afford to miss it.”
Vinny was quiet for a moment before he shrugged. 
“So move in here.” He said, like it was the most normal thing in the world. 
“What?” You froze, wondering if you heard him correctly. 
He stretched his arms above his head before flopping back onto the pillows. 
“You’re here more often than not now, it’s like you live here already. Plus, I have a spare room that needs taking, and it would save you some stress looking for another place, and I wouldn’t need to look for a new roommate who might try to kill me in my sleep.”
You turned to stare at him, trying to gauge whether he was joking. 
“Are you serious?”
“Yeah,” he said simply. “Why not?”
You blinked, your brain trying to catch up. 
“Vin, you can’t just invite me to move in like it’s no big deal.”
He raised an eyebrow. 
“Why not?”
“Because…” You hesitated. “You’ve only just forgiven me, what if it doesn’t work out? It’s a massive deal!”
Vinny just shrugged. 
“Not really. You already slept here the last two nights, and whilst I was on tour. You keep a toothbrush here, it’s like you’ve moved in anyway, might as well make it official.”
You opened your mouth, then closed it. He wasn’t wrong.
Still, moving in with Vinny? That would be dangerous. The lines between friendship and something more were already blurry as it was. If you started living together…
“I’ll think about it.” You muttered, standing up.
Vinny smirked. 
“Take your time. Offer stands.”
So of course, a week later, you let him know your final decision. 
You were about to be living with Vinny Mauro. 
“So now you’re moving in with him?! Girl, two months ago he wouldn’t even speak to you? What’s going on here?” Angela asked over the phone.
You were on facetime with her as you finished packing up your things to take to Vin’s house. The guys had been kind enough to give you their merch boxes to use for packing, and AJ had even rented a van to help you move. Over the last few weeks, you and AJ had become close. You loved him, he was like the brother you never knew you needed, he was chaotic, funny, kind, and always lit up the room wherever he was. You loved havung him around.
“I needed a place to go, Ang. They keep putting up the rent, and I would’ve had to move anyway.”
“You could’ve asked me!” She frowned.
“You have a one-bedroom apartment. I didn’t think you’d be interested in getting a bunk bed.”
“You never know! I would’ve taken the top bunk.” she giggled. Then her voice softened. “So this is purely platonic?”
“Yep.” You smiled, shoving your framed lyric sheet- your birthday gift from Ricky- into a box. “I think we are better as friends. I can still feel the tension sometimes, but he’s like that with everybody, isn’t he?”
“Uh-huh,” she confirmed, dragging out the word, clearly unconvinced. “I just don’t want you to get hurt if you’re expecting him to come back to you and then he starts dating someone else.”
“Has he been talking to other girls?” You asked, trying to sound casual. But Angela’s silence told you all you needed to know.
“Well…”
“Not that I care!” you cut in quickly. “I’ve still been talking to Ciaran every now and then. He wants to see me again, so maybe I should!”
“Y/n, the last time I checked, you weren’t really into this guy. This isn’t just because Vin’s been talking to other women?”
So he has been.
“No!” you scoffed, a little too loudly. “I’m happy just being his friend. I’ll admit that sometimes I still get that feeling around him, but if he’s seriously not interested, then that’s fine! It actually makes my life easier.”
“Babe,” Angela sighed, her voice gentle. “It’s okay to still have feelings for him. But you’re about to move in with him. If he hurts you, even unintentionally, you’re stuck seeing him every day.”
“It’s not forever. This is just temporary until I get back on my feet, book more jobs, and, y’know… maybe find the love of my life and then move in with them!”
“I’ve been trying for years, girl. Wouldn’t recommend it.” She laughed.
A knock at your door interrupted your conversation. You glanced at the time. They were early.
“Who is it?” Angela asked.
“AJ and Vin!” you said, jogging to answer the door. You cracked it open to find AJ grinning mischievously and Vinny standing beside him, hands stuffed into his hoodie pocket.
“Can I see them?” Angela asked.
You rolled your eyes but handed the phone to AJ. 
“Ang! Wassup!” AJ greeted, grinning at the phone. 
“Hey, can you give me to Vin, please?”
“Wow. Not ‘AJ, how are you?’ Not ‘AJ, I miss you’? It’s been two years, Miss Undead.” He sighed dramatically, before finally handing the phone over.
Vinny smirked as he took it. 
“Hey, Ang.”
Angela’s expression shifted into something sharper. 
“I don’t know what your plan is here, mister, but I’m not buying it.”
“What plan?” Vinny furrowed his brows, stepping outside your apartment so nobody else could hear. 
“You spent the entire week on tour with Ruby, and now, suddenly, y/n is moving in with you?”
Vinny frowned. 
“That has nothing to do with this. Y/n can’t afford her rent, and I have a spare room. We might not be together or anything, but I still care about her.”
Angela stared at him for a long moment. 
“Sleep with one eye open, Vincenzo Mauro. I don’t know if I can trust you.”
Before he could respond, you came outside, lugging a heavy box. 
“What are you doing out here?”
“Oh, uh… the signal was bad in there,” Vinny said quickly, taking the box from you as he passed your phone back.
You shot him a skeptical look. 
“C’mon, Vin! Put that drummer strength to use.” AJ laughed, grabbing a box himself.
The afternoon sun streamed through the windows as you and Vin worked to set up your new room. It had been hot all day, so Vin had long since ditched his shirt, leaving him in just his sweatpants as he crouched down, working on putting together your bed frame.
You weren’t proud of how many times your gaze had drifted to his bare back, the way his muscles flexed with every movement, the slight sheen of sweat on his skin. Anyone would stare, you told yourself.
“Y’gonna help or just stand there gawking?” Vin smirked, not even looking up as he reached for another screw.
You rolled your eyes, snapping out of it. 
“You seemed to be handling it just fine without me.”
He chuckled, shaking his head. 
“Alright, princess, help me get the mattress on this thing then.”
Together, you wrestled the mattress onto the frame, both of you slightly out of breath by the end of it, surprised at how heavy it was.
“There,” he said, stepping back and placing his hands on his hips, admiring his work. “One fully functioning bed.”
He paused, then leaned down and gave the frame a quick shake. It creaked and wobbled, just a little, just enough to maybe be concerning.
“Okay… maybe semi-functioning.” He glanced at you with a mock seriousness. “If you bring someone home, tell them no rough sex on this thing, alright? I don’t wanna be woken up by the sound of snapping wood and someone screaming.”
You blinked, caught completely off guard by how casually the words came out of his mouth.
“Vinny!” You gasped, half-scandalized.
He just shrugged, grinning like it was nothing. 
“What? I’m just saying. I wouldn’t trust that frame with anything besides missionary.”
You opened your mouth, ready with a snarky comeback, but nothing came out.
Instead, a memory resurfaced. 
You felt it all like it was yesterday.
It had been some hotel room, you’d forgotten which city. One of those nights where you both still high with energy of the show, and neither of you had been interested in sleeping.
The door had barely closed before he had you pressed against it, kissing you like he was starving. Clothes came off in a trail leading to the bed, the two of you too needy and desperate to care.
You remembered how he tossed you onto the mattress, grinning like the devil as he crawled over you…
“You’re gonna break the damn thing.” You’d whispered, breathless, laughing into his mouth as the frame gave a loud creak beneath with every thrust of his hips.
Vinny had paused, bracing himself on his hands, and looked down at you with that crooked smirk of his.
“Oh?” He said, cocking a brow. “Is that a challenge?”
You didn’t get the chance to answer before he was moving again, faster, deeper. His hands gripping your thighs, spreading you wider. Your back arched, and the bed banged against the wall with each thrust, the headboard slamming so hard you were shocked it didn’t leave a dent. 
You remembered grabbing at his shoulders, nails digging in, the sound of your laughter tangled with your moans.
“You’re actually gonna break it!" You gasped, unable to keep the smile off your face.
His lips brushed your ear as he growled, 
“Good.”
God, he’d ruined you that night.
And now he was out there, shirtless and smug, talking about missionary like he hadn’t once (well, many times actually) flipped you over and made you forget your own name…
You blinked, coming back to the present just in time to see Vin reach into a box he really shouldn’t be. 
He assumed the box labelled ‘bedroom’ would’ve been the one to look in for your sheets, but his fingers brushed against something unexpected. 
Something smooth and solid. 
Something that definitely wasn’t a sheet or pillowcase...
He stilled for a second before he slowly pulled it out…
A sleek, unmistakable wand vibrator. His breath hitched slightly, his mind flooding with images he really, really shouldn’t be having right now.
You noticed the sudden pause and looked up, only to see the expression on his face. Slightly wide eyes, a momentary twitch in his jaw before he masked it with a teasing smirk.
“Well, speaking of sex,” he mused, twirling the toy in his hand, “What do we have here?”
Your stomach dropped as you registered what he was holding. 
“Vinny. Put. that. back.”
He let out a low chuckle, tilting his head as he examined it. 
“I mean, I figured you would have one, but damn... Why is it so big?”
Your face burned as you lunged for it, but he held it out of reach, still grinning. 
“Hey! Don’t be embarrassed, I’m just saying… This thing could probably power a small boat.”
“Vinny, I swear to god, thsi isn’t funny!”
He finally handed it over, laughing as you shoved it back into the box. 
“Hey, good for you, no shame in the game! Just hope you don’t leave it somewhere I could accidentally grab it in the middle of the night thinking it’s a flashlight.”
“C’mon it’s not as if I’m just gonna leave it lying around the house!” You groaned, trying to ignore how your face was burning. “Now, can you shut up and help me finish making the damn bed?”
Still grinning, he helped you pull the sheet onto the mattress. His fingers twitched slightly when they brushed yours, and his gaze lingered just a second too long as he handed you the pillows.
“You got any more?” He asked, his voice slightly lower now, and he didn’t meet your gaze. 
“More what?”
“Y’know…” He nodded towards the box. 
Your face burned. 
“Vin…” 
“Oh you do!” He smirked. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Think of all the fun we could’ve had when we were-”
“Vinny I swear...” You cut him off, hitting him with the pillow you were holding, “I fucking hate you.”
Was this really such a good idea?
As you continue unpacking and making your room feel like home throughout the afternoon, you try to shake off Vinny’s teasing. He, on the other hand, seems to have recovered just fine, acting as if he hadn’t just dug through your things and found something very personal. 
To him, it was funny. You on the other hand, were mortified.
You shoot him a look when you catch him smirking at you again, clearly still thinking about it too. He just shrugs like he’s innocent, tossing another one of your sweaters onto the bed, adding it to the growing pile as you both sort through your clothes.
You’re still figuring out how much closet space you’ll need, as Vin had offered to buy you a new one (totally not because he and AJ broke your old one when moving it from your apartment.)
“Is it starting to feel like home yet?” He asked, stretching his arms behind his head with a loud exhale. His shirt is still nowhere in sight, and the stretch makes every inch of his torso even more distracting, enough to make you pause with the jeans in your hands.
You glance around at the half-finished room, at the open boxes, the still-bare walls, and the bed you’d made together. But then you glance at him.
Your heart squeezes unexpectedly.
When you were on tour spending months waking up in different hotel rooms in unfamiliar cities, losing track of what day it was, you never found yourself feeling homesick. Not really. 
Because how could you when he was always there. When he would make you laugh so hard you’d cry, shaking his wet hair over you when he’d come out of the shower, stealing bites of your lunch, make you dance with him when a song you both like would play. When he’d tap you on the shoulder whilst you were in the zone, editing photos on your (or Ricky’s) laptop, just to tell you a random thought he'd had before going back to playing whatever game he was in the middle of. 
With him, it never mattered where you were. The two of you could be on the opposite side of the planet together, but you’d still feel like you were at home. 
Because it was him. 
“I guess,” you ended up saying, instead of possibly turning his life upside down again, “It does.” 
But he was Vinny. And he could see when you were trying to cover something up. 
“Y’know,” he starts, clearing his throat, “It’s almost like nothing happened… It could be like you said yes. Like you did come back with me after tour.” 
The words made your heart stop in your chest. 
God, you wished it were that simple.
“Vinny…”
“I know,” he cut in quickly, shaking his head like he regretted saying it the second it left his mouth. “Forget it. That was stupid. I-”
“Vin,” you interrupted gently, “We’re friends. I’m happy with that. You’re happy with that too, right? I just don’t want to rush back into something and risk screwing it up all over again. We barely got back to good… I can’t hurt you again. I can’t lose you again.”
It hurt to say, every syllable felt like blades in your throat, because a part of you did want to pretend. A part of you did want to rewind time and just… choose him.
But everything had already happened. You couldn’t un-hurt him. You couldn’t rewind anf fix the moments that broke you both.
“Is that okay?” You asked quietly.
He didn’t look at you. Just nodded once. 
“Yeah... I was just kidding anyway.”
But he wasn’t, and you both knew it.
Silence settled between you. Not angry, not even tense, just heavy. Like grief. Like something important had been set down and left there between you.
Then your stomach growled. Loudly.
Vin blinked, lips twitching into a smirk.
“Guess that answers my question.”
You looked up. 
“What question?”
“If you wanted to eat soon.” He gave you a soft, smile. “I’ll cook.”
“Okay, sure.” You forced your own smile, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.
And just like that, the conversation finished. The moment passed, and you didn’t talk about it again.
But you both felt it, lingering like smoke in the air,  the things that could’ve been. The version of this life where you said yes, where you risked it all and went home with him after the tour last year.
You knew that conversation would never really be over, not until you both sucked it up and put your hearts on the line, but that kind of honesty was terrifying. What if you both wanted different things? What if you tried, and it didn’t work out? You wondered what if he realised you weren’t what he wanted after all? And Vin was afraid, what if he was too much for you?
Nothing scared you more than losing each other again, so you both pushed the thought aside and buried it deep, but you both knew it would come back again.
And you were afraid of what would happen when it did.
-----------------------------------
@collapsedglasshouses @miss570 @dominuslunae @sunshine-lvrr @death-ofpeace-ofmind @blade-dressed-in-red @amelia-acero @kait16xo @oobleoob @pipidoll @justdamnpeachy @bluehairpunklol @renegadebirch
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nr1chaedickrider · 1 year ago
Text
Love's gonna get you killed - we could've had it all.
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Grief is the response to the loss of something deemed important, particularly to the loss of someone that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, grief also has physical, cognitive, behavioral and social dimensions.
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The sun shines through the large window in your room, and you rub your eyes with your hands as you slowly wake up and stretch. After getting dressed, you make your way to the dining hall where Dahyun and Tzuyu are having breakfast together.
"Good morning," Tzuyu says as you sit down next to her, leaning your walking stick against the table as a cook brings you food and you mumble a "thank you".
"How's your leg?" asks Tzuyu.
Her question gives you a twinge in your head, an uncomfortable feeling, and it's as if the event that actually happened months ago is happening right now.
You clench your teeth as Momo kisses your cheek and pulls the sword out of your thigh as you fall to the ground.
All you see is her looking down at you, tears in her eyes, and whispering an "I'm sorry", her only reply, an apology, a goodbye.
She disappears between the bushes, the last time you saw her.
"Y/n?" Tzuyu asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.
"My leg... it's better now, but it still hurts sometimes, but I'll start training again soon," you answer, a small smile on your lips.
"By the way, you two were a bit loud yesterday..." you add and hear Dahyun almost choke on her food, Tzuyu laughs a little.
"Sorry," she replies.
It is quiet while the three of you eat, Tzuyu interrupts the silence,
"Various people are coming to visit us tonight, we wanted to have a big party, are you coming too?" she asks, you look at her and think about it.
But just like before, you lose yourself in your thoughts and Momo is standing right in front of you.
"Come on," she says as she stands in the water, you get in, your suit wet and you can feel the goose bumps on your body from the cold.
You both look at each other, the only sound in the background is the water.
"Y/n?" says Tzuyu, "What's wrong? Are you okay?" she asks, pulling you out of your thoughts again.
"What, ah, yes. I'm coming..." you stand up, "I think Im gonna visit Jihyo..." you say, she nods and lets you go.
-
"How are you?" asks Jihyo as you sit down next to her.
"Normal, I guess," you answer and she looks at you thoughtfully.
"Jeongyeon can officially start training again, she's doing much better," Jihyo says, breaking the silence.
Jeongyeon...
Momo, who attacked Jeongyeon to get your attention.
"Good" you just say, but Jihyo knows exactly how you feel for a reason.
"You don't care about Jeongyeon as much as you do for Momo, do you?"
You look at her, somehow trying to find an explanation that makes sense, an explanation that shows that you're not thinking about Momo, that she's not that important.
"Sana is back in the kingdom," she says to change the subject, and you suddenly feel uncomfortable.
Memories of the past come flooding back, things that happened years ago.
It's like the first time you saw her, her smile that made your cheeks glow. Her hands that touched you in such a way that you completly melted in her arms, her lips that were so soft that you felt like you were kissing the softest pillow in the world.
Her way of talking that made you cry when she left.
"Why?" you ask Jihyo and she can tell immediately that you're lost in your thoughts.
"Because of Tzuyu's party, she came all the way from Japan, as queen she has to make official visits," she answers.
"Official visits..." you mutter.
"I'm sorry," she said.
"My people need me."
"I can't be seen with you."
I can't be seen with you.
"I know you're probably not ready to see her, and maybe you never will be, but at least try," Jihyo says and you nod, looking down onto your slightly trembling hands.
-
"I'm glad you all came tonight," Tzuyu says in front of all the guests at the party, a glass of champagne in her hand and in the hands of everyone else.
"I hope you enjoy tonight!" she finishes her sentence and the people applaud as a small orchestra starts playing music, people start talking to each other while some of them start dancing.
Unfortunately, the music sounds far too familiar.
"Will you dance with me?" Momo asked when you were at Dahyun's ball, just as this song started to play.
You take a deep breath and look around, then walk out of the palace and onto the terrace.
Why was every palace built by the water?
The stony shore only reminds you more of the night, even more of the evening when you felt too comfortable with Momo.
The night when Momo kissed you on the cheek.
You take a sip of your champagne, it's quite cold, you can feel it running down your throat, leaving a slight burning sensation.
But you are not alone for long, you hear the door open, you turn around and Sana is standing right in front of you.
Your eyes widen in surprise, because somehow a small - or rather larger - part of your body was hoping that Momo would be standing in front of you, that she would be here again for some reason,
A part of your body hoped that she was looking for you.
"Y/n?" says Sana.
"Sana?" you answer, a soft whisper, as if you were afraid someone might hear you, as if you weren't allowed to speak to a queen.
"Long time no see..." she says, walking to you and leaning against the stone wall, her voice so soft again that you want to cry, to take her in your arms and tell her how much you actually missed her.
But instead of saying anything, you lean against the stone wall next to her, both of you looking at the water in the distance as the sun sets.
"I heard about what happened," she says, and you don't know what exactly she's talking about.
The situation with Momo?
The attack on you that left you still unable to train properly?
The days you spent crying for Sana? Your despair?
Too many events come to mind as Sana continues,
"That thing with your leg, that knight, what was her name again-
"Momo," you answer, perhaps a little too quickly.
"Exactly, she hurt you in the fight. I hope your leg is better," a small smile appears on her lips as she finishes her sentence.
"It's gotten a lot better," you answer, drinking the last drops of your champagne. The burning sensation is back in your throat, but somehow you start liking it, a kind of burning that is somehow pleasant.
It's quiet, uncomfortable, but comfortable at the same time. Like a paradox - it's as if she has always been here, as if she never went to Japan.
"I missed you."
Sana says after a while, and it scares you somehow - you don't answer.
But Sana doesn't mind, not at all - she found your quiet way somehow relaxing. She always liked the way you listened to her without answering, because deep in her heart she knew that you somehow remembered everything, that you thought of every single detail even when she was gone.
"Whether you want to believe me or not is your decision, but I can only say that to this day I regret leaving," she says as you look at her, her eyes are slightly watery - another one of her special qualities - she gets emotional easily when she talks about her feelings.
You put your hand on hers, your thumb gently stroking her palm, a small but somehow meaningful sign for Sana. A kind of comfort.
How ironic, really, that you are comforting her.
You look back at the water, Sana does the same.
"I'll stay here longer, y/n," she adds.
Part of your body rejoices, maybe you shouldn't, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't think about her almost every day.
Thinking about Sana has distracted you from many things -
especially at this moment.
You don't notice Momo opening the door and watching you and Sana.
You don't notice the way her grip on the glass is getting tighter and tighter.
Despair? Anger?
Fear?
And when you hear the sound of glass falling to the floor and shattering into little pieces -
Momo was already gone.
-
Your head hurts when you wake up, maybe it was stupid to play drinking games with Tzuyu, Dahyun and Sana.
Actually, you wanted to stay civil, but... it didn't work out so well.
You decide to take a walk through the forest to get some fresh air.
After a few minutes you find yourself in this place.
Behind bushes and trees -
The place where you saw Momo for the first time.
The place where she gave you the scar on your face - which is almost gone now,
The place where you and Momo fought in the rain.
The place where you kissed before you never saw her again.
But this time it's different, this time there's no Momo here to attack you, this time you're all alone, without any armor or weapon.
You sit down on the grass and lean against a bigger stone.
And it's so different from the other times, it's just quiet, pleasant.
And maybe it would have stayed that quiet and pleasant if you hadn't suddenly heard footsteps coming closer and closer,
and before you can even react,
Momo is standing right in front of you.
She looks down at you, her expression is hard to read, it's hard for you to tell what she's feeling.
The only thing you notice is that she has no weapon or armor.
She's not here as a knight from the other Kingdom, but simply as Momo.
Just Hirai Momo.
None of you dare to say anything, maybe that's what makes you different from Sana -
You're more afraid.
Because what you did with Momo was always whispering, talking at night, hiding.
She doesn't say anything, she just sits down next to you.
And you don't complain, no, of course not.
Because somehow this is something you've wanted for months.
You don't complain when Momo puts her head on your shoulder, but you put your head on hers.
You both look at the ground in front of you, the only sounds are your breathing, the chirping of birds and a light breeze that comes now and then.
And Momo's hand plays with the grass under her fingers, perhaps a sign of nervousness?
And when she starts humming softly, you don't mind, no, you just try to listen to her even more.
Even though the melody is unfamiliar to you, it is somehow so relaxing, unfamiliar and yet familiar at the same time.
And what's going on in your head that you're doing this, that you're daring to take her hand.
She doesn't pull her hand away, but intertwines your fingers.
And her cold hand is somehow so pleasant that you warm it with your warm hand and she cools you down with hers.
And this moment is more pleasant than you thought, if you only knew who exactly was watching.
Because the person is not happy, they don't know why they feel this way, but it hurts their heart.
Anger?
-
You yawn as you look around and slowly realize the situation you are in,
or rather, were.
You are still sitting on the grass, your back leaning against a stone as you look beside you,
Momo is gone.
Without a word of goodbye.
You get up, pick up your walking stick and walk back to the palace, it's quite late and you wonder how long you've been in the forest.
Before you can enter the palace, you run into Jihyo who quickly pulls you aside.
You give her a confused look before she starts talking,
"Sana's been looking for you all day," she says, and your body starts to hurt.
Why is she looking for you?
Does she know about Momo?
"I don't know what's going on, but she's in your room. Maybe you should go upstairs and talk to her," Jihyo says and you nod, thanking her for the warning.
The walk upstairs felt faster than usual, you take a breath and open the door, Sana is standing in front of the large window as you walk in.
You close the door behind you and walk slowly towards her, leaving a few feet of space.
"You shouldn't stand so long, sit down," she says, but it sounds more like an order.
You nod and sit down, she walks towards you.
"Where have you been?" she asks.
"In the forest."
"Why?"
Her question makes you think. You just wanted to get some fresh air, then you met Momo and just fell asleep.
"Just like that, why do you care?" you ask back and Sana laughs a little.
"You shouldn't spend time with people like that, especially not falling asleep next to them," she says, standing right in front of you.
She knows about it?
She has seen you and Momo?
Why is she telling you all this?
Thousands of questions pop into your head and you can already feel the headache, Sana interrupts your thoughts when she starts talking again,
"I know Momo, and believe me, she's not a good influence for you. She's dangerous, and you're not the first person she's had contact with like this. I only want the best for you," she says.
"What do you mean?" you ask, but she only confuses you more with her words.
She sits down across from you, her legs crossed, her back straight and her posture noble.
"You are not her first victim. No matter what you think is going to happen between you, it won't. She did something to my kingdom years ago that is still unforgivable," she replies.
"Just believe me, please. You know I only want the best for you."
Your hand clenches into a fist, how ironic that Sana out of all people would say such things.
"You only want the best for me? You left me, you said you couldn't be seen with me. You have no idea what's best for me," you reply, perhaps a little too aggressively.
But Sana doesn't seem to be offended, her expression is still neutral, but it looks like she's suppressing a smile when she starts talking again.
"Why is Momo so important to you that you get so defensive?" she asks.
She probably knew exactly what point she had hit.
Sana knows exactly how your emotions tick, she knows every single detail and could make you cry in just a second.
"I..." you start to speak, but nothing comes out.
"She attacked you, she's a knight of the other kingdom, she almost killed Jeongyeon. So I ask again, why is she so important to you?" she says, provoking you even more.
And as you think about it, you realize what a bad person Momo really is.
The many fights, the attack on Jeongyeon, the provocation, her aggression.
The way she made you cry?
Her tender lips on yours before she disappeared for months?
When she listened to you talk about your fears at the ball?
And her alleged attacks were never fatal, you start to notice while thinking about everything.
Jeongyeon - She hit her in a place that heals easily.
You - The scar on your face that didn't even touch your eye or neck.
Her sword that was in your thigh - it healed faster than you thought.
The way she always called for the others after hurting you, so you could get help right away.
Sana stands up, on her way out of your room, but before she can leave, you turn around and say something.
"Maybe Momo is a better person than you."
Sana turns and looks at you, a smile on her lips.
A smile?
"I see" she answers and closes the door behind her.
Why did she say that?
Why did she smile?
What is she up to?
-
It is dark, the wind is cold and yet so pleasant.
You find yourself in front of a large stone wall, one that protects the palace.
Or rather;
You are standing in front of Dahyun's kingdom.
Even though peace has been restored, you prefer to play it safe and take the more inconspicuous route.
You bite your lower lip as you climb up, your thigh tightening from the pain as you reach the other side.
And as you run up the stairs to Momo's room, you are stopped.
"Who are you?" asks a man, taller than you, a small sword in his hand - probably as a defense.
You remember your dream again, the one in which you also met this man.
You don't answer him, but attack him, the sword flies out of his hands and lands in yours.
And before he can react, you stab him.
And as if nothing had happened, you just keep walking.
Up the stairs, through her door and close it behind you.
You look around her room first, it looks similar to yours, maybe because you're both knights.
You want to turn around, but you bump into something.
Or rather,
against someone.
You gasp as you feel a knife at your neck.
And somehow it's just like in your dream again.
"Momo, it's me," you say as she pulls her knife away from your neck again and puts it away.
"Why are you here?" she asks as she sits down on her bed, leaving space for you as you sit down next to her.
"I honestly don't know..." you start to say,
"I talked to Sana," you can tell from Momo's reaction that something is wrong.
The look on her face confuses you. Why is she reacting like this? What's the story behind the two of them?
"Did she tell you not to talk to me anymore? That I'm a bad influence?" Momo asks, you nod slowly, hoping she'll finally explain why Sana has been acting like this.
"I wasn't always part of Dahyun's kingdom Y/n," she says, and you're only more confused.
"Before Sana was in charge of her kingdom, it was Mina. Younger than Sana and I, but part of the royal family, which is why she came to power when her parents passed away." the more she talks, the more confused you get.
"We were pretty close friends, the three of us, I served Mina's kingdom," Momo stops talking for a moment, taking a breath as she looks down at her hands.
"It got to the point where Mina kissed me, and I kissed her back. We acted like two little teenagers in love, but then..." You see her thinking about how to phrase her next words, she lets out a little laugh.
"Our kingdom was attacked and I defended Mina and Sana. Mina wanted to stay with me the whole time because she was worried about me. When it came to an attack...
she stood in front of me because I didn't see it coming, right infront of me and Sana.
I wanted to help her, but in the end it was too late.
Sana still hasn't forgiven me for it, it seems. She got everyone to turn on me, and I fled because it's supposedly all my fault." Momo says and stops talking, you look at her, and now somehow you understand everything.
"But it's not your fault" you whisper, it shouldn't even come out as a whisper, but somehow it just doesn't come out any louder.
Momo looks at you, a slight smile on her lips - which quickly disappears,
"But maybe you need to listen to Sana, even if I hate to say it.
I don't want anything bad to happen to you," she says.
Couldn't she have just said "Don't listen to Sana"?
"Wouldn't it be funny if this was the last time we talked to eachother in peace?" Momo asks.
You look at her and somehow wish she hadn't said that, because it makes you somehow scared.
But you choose to ignore it.
You choose to focus on the present, on what's happening now and not years later.
You take a deep breath and take her hand in yours.
Her hand is cold, again, - yours is warm.
She looks at you as you answer;
"You're both idiots"
Momo looks at you, confused.
You close the distance between the two of you, her soft lips on yours as she dares not move.
This time it's different.
It's not a stupid dream you're having because you're confused about your feelings for Momo.
It's all more real.
And you want it, so, so much.
But before you can pull away, Momo starts kissing you back.
And her lips feel so soft, it feels like a new sensation that drives you crazy.
As you two continue kissing, Momo pushes her tongue into your mouth and you let out a soft whimper at the feeling of her exploring your mouth.
She pushes you into her matress as she gets on top of you, leaving your lips as she places wet kisses on your jaw, trailing down to your neck and leaving hickeys by biting, sucking and nibbling on your skin.
Your hands grip the bedsheets, head leaning back deeper into the pillow because of the pleasure, toes curling into the bed as Momo parts your legs with her free hand, slowly and lightly rubbing circles over the pants you have on.
"Fuck Momo-" you let out, opening your eyes to make eye contact with her.
Her hands toy with the hem of your shirt, looking at you with a smile that seems more like a nasty smirk.
"Can I take this off?" she asks, and you're close to just rip off your shirt yourself, because Momo knows damn well how much you want this.
"Don't ask stupid questions.." you answer, and your t-shirt is being pulled off faster than you thought.
And Momo's eyes sparkle a little when she sees that you haven't thought about wearing a bra, being topless right infront of her.
She leans down, trailing her kisses down from your collarbone to your chest - kissing inbetween your breasts before taking one of your hardened buds into her mouth, her hand playing with the other one.
You throw your head back again, back arching, wanting to get somehow even closer to her touch.
After licking, biting and lightly sucking, she continues kissing down your body, stopping right infront of your pants.
She thinks quicker than you - catching your hands before you could, somehow, make her touch you where you really need it faster.
She looks up to you, that nasty smirk fully on her lips, and oh god what you would do to wipe it off her face so she stops feeling so confident.
"You're so impatient baby, how long did you wait for this?" she asks teasingly, her voice husky, making that one damp spot on your underwear even wetter.
"Too long-" you whimper, maybe it would be embarrassing to admit this, and it is probably very embarrassing - but in this moment, you couldn't care less.
Your body is hot, sweaty, and your mind clouded by the thought of Momo finally touching you like you desire.
Mind full of wanting to submit to her, your body trusting her completly to being in charge.
She interrupts your thinking when you see her having a piece of black cloth in her hands, her look on her face not that teasing, rather like she is asking you if she can do what she wants to do.
A simple question, no strings attached.
You nod.
She smiles, sitting upright as she takes your arms, placing them behind your back as she ties your wrists together, not too tight, but definetly so tight that you cant simply take them off.
She plays with the strings of your pants, clearly teasing you, again.
"How bad do you want this?" she asks, leaning on top of you as she whispers into your ear, her breath hot and her voice sensual.
You feel shivers running down your spine as she speaks, thinking of an answer that will leave her satisfied enough to touch you.
"So bad that its embarrassing to say, so bad that i would say it infront of the whole kingdom so they can hear it." you answer, and your breath hitches when Momo brushes her finger against the damp spot, pressing right against your heat, telling by her face, she's visibly satisfied by your answer.
"Can't leave you hanging, right?" she says, fingers hooking onto your pants as she pulls them off along with your underwear, throwing it on your shirt.
She lowers herself so her face is right infront of your core, her slow breaths tickling you in a way that makes your hips buck.
She comes closer, leaving kitten licks on your clit as you moan, head leaning back into the pillow as you bite your bottom lip.
Your hands try to move as you realize that they are tied together, wrists rubbing against eachother as your body tries to feel Momo even more.
"Please.. don't tease-" you moan out, earning a chuckle from her.
"Okay okay.." she answers, her tongue suddenly moving faster as she enters your hole, making you let out a louder moan.
You turn your head as you moan into the pillow your head is laying on, back arching even more when she speeds up.
"Momo.." you pant, moans leaving your mouth while you try to speak.
"I'm close-" you say, feeling her smirk as she, somehow, goes even faster, even deeper.
Your thighs close around her head, forcing her to spread them open again with her hands as you cum into her mouth, a loud moan ripping from your mouth as your juices flow out.
Momo pulls back, watching you breathe heavily as you try to come down from your high, brushing your hair out of your face and tucking it behind your ear.
Maybe this is her favorite sight.
Seeing you like this.
Hands tied behind your back, cheeks flushed, neck full of hickeys, back slightly arched, eyes closed and your brows furrowed.
She doesn't get to stare long though - you open your eyes and look at her.
"Admiring me?" you say and laugh a little.
"Maybe" she answers, fingers drawing circles on your thigh.
A silent request, an invitation.
Her motives are clear as a sky without clouds.
And again, you nod, letting her take control over this situation, - letting her take control over you.
She smiles, fingers inching closer to your heat.
And when you feel her fingers brush over your clit, your mouth drops open, hips bucking into her touch, wanting more.
She pulls her fingers away, a string of wetness on them.
Her fingers slide down, through your folds as she slowly puts a finger in, your hands gripping the cloth that is restricting your hands.
You let out a moan and bite down on your lip.
And when Momo slowly starts to move, she realizes the way you're so tight.
"First time?" she asks, and you embarrassingly nod, cheeks turning into a crimson color.
She smiles, hand trailing up your body, leaning forward as she kisses your neck softly.
"I got you" she whispers, kissing along your neck and collarbone, adding another finger into you slowly.
"Fuck Momo-" you moan, your mind going crazy over the new sensation of Momo's long, thick, fingers inside of you, body slightly grinding onto her to feel her even more.
And she starts to thrust into you, some slow, experimental thrusts to see how you would feel.
Your moans get louder, and all your thoughts disappearing as your mind gets clouded by the way you feel Momo everywhere.
Her mouth lands on your breasts, kissing them as she drags a tongue over your nipple, making your back arch off the bed and closer to her.
"Are you close?" she asks, smiling against your chest as she curls her fingers into that spot that makes you moan even louder.
You nod, lip trapped between your teeth, head thrown back.
She grins against your chest, her fingers moving even faster, scissoring and curling into the spots that make you crazy.
"Momo-" you yell out, toes curling into the matress, gripping the cloth that is tied around your wrists, body twitching while cumming.
She slowly stops moving her fingers, helping you ride out your high.
She pulls her fingers out, slowly licking them clean.
You try to calm down, panting with your eyes closed.
Momo pulls off the cloth from your hands, and when you open your eyes you can see the little red marks it left.
She smiles at you, taking your hand in hers.
"How about we take a bath?" she asks with a smirk.
That nasty smirk again, the one that makes you want to wipe it off her face.
The one you slowly start to adore.
"Sounds good" you answer.
-
War.
War is like a plague, a disease.
Something that can always come back for some reason.
Once you have it, it will never leave you.
Peace, however, is something you can only dream of.
The complete opposite of war.
And while the kingdoms enjoyed the supposed peace, war came right after.
Unprepared, without any signs, without any official announcement.
It was only days after you slept with Momo.
Days after you last spoke to Sana.
Jihyo stands beside you as Tzuyu gives a speech to the residents, your armor donned.
"Are you sure you're really ready to fight yet?" she whispers to you.
You look to her briefly, and nod.
You look next to you and look at Momo.
"We'll do everything we can to keep the peace!" says Tzuyu.
"Our kingdoms will work together for your safety." says Dahyun, standing next to Tzuyu.
Momo has a slight smile on her lips, and it makes you show yours too.
Maybe you really are like childish teenagers who are in love, but in this moment - and in all other moments, really - you don't care.
Because you both have each other, and that's the most important thing.
You can be happy together.
Even with war.
You are split into groups, Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo and you, while the other knights are in another small group protecting a different part of the kingdom.
You run through the forest in two lines,
Jihyo and Jeongyeon are behind you,
Momo and you lead the way, all four of you with swords in hand, making sure no one can attack you.
It's darker now, which means you have to concentrate so that you can see everything clearly.
You walk past the part of the forest you've been to too often.
A part where you have probably made the most memories.
And somehow every one of them has something to do with Momo.
Momo notices you looking there and touches you with her arm so that you look at her, she smiles at you.
A simple sign that she knows what you're thinking about.
You hear a strange noise behind you, but before you can turn around you feel a blow to your head and fall to the ground.
The last thing you see are people standing in front of you and pulling a cloth bag over everyone's head so that you can't see anything.
The last thing you feel is thick ropes being tied around your arm.
And suddenly, you feel nothing as everything goes black.
As you slowly begin to regain consciousness, you realize that you are still tied up, your vision still blocked by the cloth bag.
You try to hear something and realize that you are in a carriage, or rather a horse-drawn carriage as you can tell by the clattering of hooves.
The cart comes to an abrupt stop as you hear something being opened, probably to get you out, but suddenly, you hear a whisper next to you -
"I'll find you in every universe."
You can tell by the voice that it's Momo, and how much you want to answer, Momo is pulled away and someone grabs you to get you out of the car.
You run to where you are being led and somehow you are scared, of course you should be scared, but that uneasy feeling in your stomach makes it all worse.
You are pushed to the ground, onto your knees.
The cloth bag is pulled off your head, and as you look around, you are shocked.
You see many knights, from their armor you can tell they are not from Tzuyu's or Dahyun's kingdom.
You see Sana.
Sana?
Her clothes dark, her expression cold as she watches all the other knights being forced to their knees just like you.
You look beside you, and a few meters away you see her.
Momo.
She looks you in the eye, her smile no longer on her lips, but, for the first time, her look is different.
She is afraid.
Next to you are Jihyo and Jeongyeon, somewhere further you see knights like Nayeon and Chaeyoung.
You look at Sana again, and as everyone looks at her, she starts talking.
"I'm glad to be here," she says with a wicked grin, one that gives you goosebumps.
She takes the sword from a knight and looks at it, then smiles.
"I don't really like doing the dirty work," she says.
"But as queen, sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands"
She looks around, her eyes landing on you.
"Oh Y/n, long time no see right?" she asks, kneeling down in front of you, sword in her hand.
She reaches behind your head, your hair between her fingers as she pulls your head back.
You grit your teeth.
Momo, further away, tries to get free, somehow, to help you, but it's impossible.
"Oh Y/n.. Our friendship is great, isn't it? Or maybe we have more?" she asks teasingly.
"We don't have anything." you reply, and she laughs.
She laughs and lets go of your hair to stand up.
"Because Momo is better than me, right? Right?" she asks, pacing back and forth a few steps.
You don't answer, but only feel more uncomfortable and wonder what exactly Sana is up to here.
"If you look around you'll see that we're somewhere in the middle of nowhere. A perfect place for corpses" she announces and everyone looks at her in confusion, looks full of fear.
"But don't be afraid... You don't have to do anything except watch..." she says, but suddenly she adds something that makes your blood freeze -
"Unless your name is Hirai Momo, then you're the star of the show!" she finishes, and everyone is even more shocked, Momo's eyes wide open as Sana points her sword at her.
"Sana! You can't do this," you say.
A pathetic attempt to somehow save Momo, to somehow stop Sana from doing what she's about to do.
Sana approaches Momo and stands right in front of her.
"Sana please!" you call out, she looks at you.
"Please..." you feel your eyes getting watery, "it's not Momo's fault that Mina is dead, you know that!"
Sana listens to you, lets you finish, and you feel like she's really letting up.
"You don't have to do this. Please. You're not a better person if you kill Momo. It won't bring Mina back!" you say, tears streaming down your eyes.
Sana nods.
Sana nods?
"I think you're right, Y/n..." she says, lowering the sword.
Only to raise it again.
"I make my own decisions, though." she says.
Momo looks at you,
and suddenly her face is covered in blood.
Sana's sword is suddenly stuck in her head before she pulls it out.
You've seen brutal things, of course, you're a knight -
But seeing Momo,
Momo being killed in front of you.
"Momo!" you scream.
Your eyes are full of tears and you somehow try to untie these filthy ropes.
Because somehow you think you still have a chance to save her.
Momo looks at you.
"Y/n.. I'll... I'll find you..."
She topples over, onto the dirty ground, onto the grass.
"Momo..." you say again, hoping that this isn't real.
It's just a bad dream, isn't it?
Or is it?
Jihyo looks at you, tears in her eyes and in everyone else's, but you're only focused on Momo.
She doesn't move, just lies there.
Not a single breath, no stupid grin, nothing.
-
"Why not in this one?" you ask.
"Why couldn't you just find me in this universe?" you ask.
And to hear you like that, you'd think you were talking to someone.
But no one is standing in front of you, or next to you.
You are alone.
'Hirai Momo, a fighter, a person full of love' is written on the gravestone.
And it doesn't feel real.
And a part of your body still hopes it's not real.
You kneel down, run your hand slowly over the engraved writing.
"Why?" you ask into the silence.
And inside, you think to yourself that someone is behind you, answering your question.
In your mind, Momo is standing behind you and says that she survived.
"I will never forget you," you say.
A promise.
One that you will never break.
One that you will always remember.
You will remember how beautiful she was, how she made you feel.
You will remember her smile, and you will always love her.
"I'll never love anyone like that again" you say to yourself, maybe you say it to her, in another universe she is listening to you.
In your heart, Momo is not a knight of the other kingdom,
Or a bad person,
But simply Hirai Momo.
221 notes · View notes
megamagimugi · 9 months ago
Note
Well, my dear Mugi! I hope you're ready because I'm about to send you my list of emojis... and it's not gonna be short either 🤭💖
🫀🌻🍄🪻🧠🕹️💿♟️🥊 (with and for you!) 🍁🕰️ (always platonically like the heart says) 🍬💧🌑 (I'm always here even if I take too long to answer, but I'm always willing to listen) 🐚 (of course I was gonna give it to you too!) and last but not least...
🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
Based on this ask game.
Let's see, 1, 2, 3... 16?! You broke my record and sent as many as SIXTEEN (No, sending the same emoji 88 times doesn't count, you cheater!). You really just had to one-up me, huh? Okay, I see how it is. Congrats, you won!
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Jokes aside, I'm really touched, Zahra. I don't even know how to properly react to something like this. For starters, thank you!!
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Boy, oh boy. So many emojis, so many feelings. Maybe I'll just comment directly on each one.
Let's see whatcha got there:
🫀- I love you in a deeply concerning platonic way <- Thank you for loving me. Love you too! Somehow you make saying these words easier than normal, even though I'm still not exactly used to saying them.
🌻- I'm proud of you <- I don't understand why, but thanks😃
🍄- you didn't deserve what happened to you <- ...Yeah, I know, or at least hope so😔 Thanks, friend.
🪻- you are so so cool and awesome oh my god <- Oh yeah😎 Haha, thank you, and so are you!
🧠 - I love hearing you talk. you should ramble to me more often <- That's a relief, because I wanna keep talking to you! But also...
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I mean, private ramblings aside, your fics and headcanons are always a pleasure to read. Not to mention your lovely reblogs of my art, especially those where you dig deeper and analyze what I try to portray🥹 I love them all dearly and have, in fact, reread each one a few times.
🕹️- I wanna go to an arcade with you <- Glad you share my excitement about this, let's-a go! How about some Mario Kart, for example?
💿 - I wanna listen to music with you in a treehouse in a summer night <- Pack your suitcase, we're going over to @vulpixfairy1985's place, build a treehouse if she doesn't have one already, and doing just that for hours on end.
♟️- you, me, board games. <- You're on. Also a good treehouse activity, eh?
🥊- I'd beat someone up with you <- Then I already have one deserving candidate in mind😏 But for me? No need, my friend, but I sure appreciate your willingness to do so!
🍁 - I'm so glad you're my friend <- Aww... So am I, times 10.
🕰️- I'll love you until the end of time, dear friend. <- Oh... That's a nice sentiment, dear friend, and I appreciate the thought. But after everything I've been through and learned about people, I know better than to promise anyone forever, or take someone's word for it. If you love me like a close friend right now, then that has to be enough❤️ Oh, and don't worry, of course I know it's all strictly platonic, this entire ask game is! And I wouldn't have it any other way😉
🍬 - I'd go to a candy store with you and steal all the candy <- Mmm, candy... But why steal tho?😥 You know what, I'll just suggest the same thing I did to @bberetd. We can go at night, have fun staging it as a raid and take all the candy, but secretly leave the money for the owner to find next morning. We can even draw them a map so they can have fun treasure hunting, too😜
💧- you are an important presence in my life <- Got to keep this one in mind, thanks. And you're in mine!
🌑 - you worry me sometimes. just remember im here if you ever wanna talk about anything <3 <- Sorry for worrying you. I'm so grateful for your support, kindness and compassion though, you have no idea🫂
🐚 - our souls are linked in ways I can't put to words <- If even you, such a talented writer, can't put it to words, then there ain't no way I can🤣 No, but seriously, I'm honored and touched knowing you feel the same way. Makes me about 30% less embarrassed.
🫂 - I wanna hug you <- Same. Very much. Like actually, physically hug you. But since we can't do that, the gifs will have to suffice:
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...Okay, I don't think I can add 88 gifs, but hope these are acceptable 😄
20 notes · View notes
sweetlysniffly · 10 months ago
Text
Hayfever Haze
Fandom: Hell//uva B//oss
Summary: Mill//ie’s run out of hayfever medicine, and it’s got Moxx//ie’s in a bit of a daze.
A/N: Im sure if you follow me you know how much I say that I want Millie content, so I finally got off my ass and wrote a little something. This is like, my first full kink fic so bear with me. Both m&m have the kink in this fic btw, as per my headcanon. I might do a part 2 depending on if people like this or not so let me know what you think 💕
There were a couple things Blitz knew he could depend on whenever he walked into IMP. Loona doing anything but working, something heavy falling on Moxxie, and Millie's megawatt smile. One of those things was missing this morning.
"Mills?" Blitz called, only for his coworker to shush him with a finger to his lips.
"Sir, could you be any louder?"
"Well sure I can, Mox, but you'd have to buy me dinner first-
Moxxie rolled his eyes, "Eugh. Sir, I mean it. Look."
Moxxie turned Blitz's head to see Millie, sitting at the conference table in her typical spot, head down in her arms. Was she...crying? He couldn't hear any sobbing, and Moxxie would probably be all over her-
Blitz's train of thought was interrupted by the sound of snoring. He watched as Millie's head turned and the sound became less muffled.
"Normally I'd say something about not paying you to sleep on the job-
"Sir, we don't have a client today-
"Shut up, Mox! Can't you see your wife is trying to sleep? Now, I was going to say that normally I'd say something but she...doesn't look too good."
Blitz was right. The position Millie passed out in didn't look especially comfortable, especially for her neck. Her nose and eyes were flushed red, and her mouth was slightly agape as she slept. There were crumpled-up tissues on the table around her and floor at her feet, and a red gingham handkerchief loose in her hand.
Blitz got intense, staring Moxxie in the eyes. "What happened? Did you hurt her, Moxxie? Cause I swear-
"What? No sir, I would never!" Moxxie sighed, gesturing towards his poor wife, as if it was obvious. "She has really bad allergies this time of year: not used to the city trees, and we ran out of her allergy medicine. She was up all night because she couldn't breath through her nose."
Blitz noticed that Moxxie seemed a little...less confident than when he normally spoke. He could chalk it up to trying to be quiet so he doesn't wake Millie up, but there was something else there too. He didn't have too much time to dwell on it before they whipped their heads to a sound from across the room.
“Hupt'TSCHUH!!”
Sniffles and a tired moan followed her audible heavy sneeze. Millie brought a hanky up to her face to blow, but was unsuccessful as only a squeak emitted from her nose.
"Guh..." Millie lifted her head from the table. "Sorry 'bout the mess, B, I'll clean it up." She sniffed loudly, rubbing her the sleep from her itchy, irritated eyes. Moxxie, ever the gentleman, scrambled to clean the tissues up before his wife could.
"You sure you should be here, Mills? No offense but you look like death warmed over."
"Thanks, B." Millie mumbled with slight irritation in her tone. "It's these damn trees and all the pollen in the air. Its different than back home. Didn't know I had allergies 'till I moved here.” She sat up, aiming to be spry and attentive to the assignment. “What's on the agenda for today?" She punctuated her sentence with a thick sniffle. Her usually energy was gone, her voice showing clear signs of a scratchy throat and thick congestion.
Blitz side eyed Moxxie, unsure of how to react. Can you let an employee have sick leave for allergies? She'd probably just get them caught on a mission with all her sniffling and sneezing. Well its his business, he reasoned, he can do whatever he wants.
He went back to his daily boss monologuing routine. “Well, I was thinking that-
"hupT'SCHUh! hechT-CHIEW ! huh...heuhh....HUdshcHhH! Sngkkk." Millie wiped her dripping nose on her sleeve. “Bless me. Sorry, boss.”
Blitz resumed. “That since you can't go two seconds without sneezing, Loonie and I will go out and get your medicine while you and Mox stay back and get some rest.” He wrapped his arms around Loona to give her a hug. She scowled, and although she didn't hug back, she didn't push him off. Blitz grinned.
"We can't really go on a mission with you sneezing so much, Mills, we'd probably get caught. And Stolas and I aren't exactly on...peachy terms right now so we can't expect him to come save us if we do."
Moxxie put a hand on her back, assuring her that neither he nor Blitz thought any less of her or her capabilities. Moxxie could tell how bad her allergies were back at the apartment, but she insisted she was fine. She couldn't skip work over allergies! And she definitely didn't need to.
"I'm fine, Blitz, really."
Moxxie took her hand. "Millie, honey, Blitz is right. We need our strongest fighter in tip top shape." He tapped her nose and smiled reassuringly, hoping she'd take the compliment. The second his finger lifted however, he noticed Millie's eyes shutting and her head leaning up. She lifted her hand to cover the sneeze, forgetting her husband’s fingers were still interlinked with hers.
"hUT'zchiEEWww!! snff...snff"
As the spray hit his hand, Moxxie felt an electricity spread through his skin. Heat rose into his cheeks as blood also rushed to...other areas of his body. He took in a small, but noticeably sharp, breath. "B-bless you, honey." He stuttered out.
Millie turned, a bit mortified. "Ugh, sniff sniff, sorry honey. It snuck up on mbe." She patted down her pockets, looking for something to clean off his hand with, only to come up with used tissues. "I'b all outta tissues." She snuffled, and it came out louder than she thought it would be. "Exusbe mbe."
Blitz quickly glanced down the same place Moxxie had glanced. Ohhhh. That makes sense, he thought to himself. He'd noticed Moxxie's...peculiar behavior around sneezing before, but he always chalked it up to being uptight. Moxxie could be pretty hoity toity sometimes, so Blitz always assumed his gunman was a germaphobe. But a part of him always wondered if it was more than that.
He had his answer now. He watched with a smug grin on his face as Moxxie shyly offered Millie a handkerchief from his inner coat pocket. God, how did he manage to be that much of a gentleman while he was that horny?
"We'll get some more tissues too. I was gonna run out anyway. Your snot isn't the only...bodily fluid that comes out frequently here. Bye M&M!"
Loona didn't look up from her phone as she walked out the door. Blitz lingered in the doorway a while, locking eyes with Moxxie. He taunted his employee, watching him blush harder as a shit eating grin spread across his face.
"Have fun while we're gone. Bye, Millie Billieeeeee!”
Millie watched them walk out the door before slumping her head on his husbands shoulder. “I think all this congestion is makin’ mby head tense up.”
At the sound of her suddenly lower, raspier voice softly hitting his ears, Moxxie felt his tail pointing and smiled. “I can help with that…”
TBC…
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sunwarmed-ash · 10 months ago
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WIP Thursday/[Sinful Sunday post??]
hey so im gonna be taking time off writing for another job all next week so I'm posting this so you have something to read. DONT WORRY Sinful Sunday will continue, I'll just be busy this sunday and next making that capitalist coin!
This may turn into a fic, it may not. I wrote it right after I finished QAF for the 36th time.
Tags: Angsty steddiegrove, sex work, HIV+ character, violence
"Where do you go at night?"
Steve and Eddie are lying on Steve’s bed smoking weed when Steve asks the question that will inevitably change the course of their relationship, their future, forever. 
"What," Eddie asks, trying and failing for aloof. He thought he had been so careful. 
“You sneak out, every night. Where do you go, when you leave?"
Lying is the only probable next course of action. If he wants to keep Steve in his life that is. The truth will sever everything they once had. 
“Dealing doesn’t exactly fit a normal 9-5," Eddie says. It’s a half-lie. 
"You were selling drugs in Lafayette at 3 in the morning? Do you think I’m stupid," Steve snaps.
Eddie’s entire body flashes hot with the amount of detail in that accusation.  
"What? No! Wait, how did you- hang on, have you been spying on me?"
"Answer the question Eddie!"
Eddie feels cornered, and that’s never a good place for him to be. Because when he feels trapped, he lies, and he can’t stop. He will say anything to cover his ass, even if its just to survive to see another minute. 
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you..."
Steve scoffs at Eddie’s attempt at self ownership. 
"Why can’t you tell me, Eddie? I mean, after everything we’ve been through!”
Eddie bites into his tongue. He wishes it was that easy. God, does he wish it could be that simple...  
“i can't, not with everything baby. I'm sorry.” 
“Why not?” Steve demands and now he’s angry. His eyes are lined with tears and Eddie can feel the beginning of the end coming like an approaching storm. 
“Because you won't love me anymore.” 
It’s the truth. And Eddie hates to even hear the words out loud. Because its gonna hurt so bad to hear it twice. From Steve’s lips. The soundbite will live with him for eternity. 
“Isn't that for me to decide,” Steve objects. 
“You've already decided.” 
Eddie remembers the shit Harrington pulled on Wheeler when she hurt his frail male ego by just existing in the same space as another man. He remembers the hateful way Steve spits the word ‘whore’ because he associates it with his father and all of his sins. It’s how everyone says the word. Like its poison in their mouth. 
Slut. Hooker. Whore. But that's what Eddie is. Until he can find something that pays better. Because he has to eat. He and Wayne won’t survive an Indiana winter without heat. And after Eddie was banished and then half-heartedly rewelcome into a unstable healing community, no one in Hawkins treats him the same. Weed sales have dried up. No one wants to hire him for any job. Not even the mechanic shop down the street that is desperately understaffed and Eddie is overqualified for. So what the hell else is he supposed to do? Wayne just turned 68. He shouldn’t need to work 12 hour shifts just to barely support the kid he didn't ask for in the first place. Eddie never should have been his burden. So this is Eddie’s way of giving back. Pulling his own weight so he didn't feel so much like a goddamn freeloader all the time. But could Steve understand that? Steve wasn’t stupid, but he also wasn’t, lets say as morally flexible as some other people.
"I can't- do this Eddie... If you’re going to lie to me." Steve says and one look into his eyes and Eddie feels what's left of the tie between them sever. 
"I'm not lying," He insists but its a half truth at best. 
"You're not telling me everything, that counts," Steve all but shouts. 
"You don't tell me everything."
He referring to whatever the hell went on between Hargrove and him two years ago. Eddie and Steve arent the only people different after an apocalypse. Their previous heated rivalry has all but burned out. So has Hargroves own personal brand of anger. They move around each other like chess pieces, always conscious of the others movement to limit interactions at school. But after school? Eddie’s seen Billy’s camero parked at Harrington’s more than it's parked in the trailer park. 
"That's different Eddie,” Steve huffs, scoffs as he pushes his hair back. “and you know it."
"How, how is it different Steve?" Eddie’s never brought it up before tonight. Eddie’s never been one for exclusivity, why the hell should he expect Steve to be?
"It doesn't involve you, or us. This does."
"Right,” Eddie scoffs, “Well, for argument's sake, it is safer for you not to know. For both of us."
Steve is silent for three beats too long.
Here it comes. 
Eddie can’t look at him. His face goes numb before the words can hit his ears. 
"Then you have my answer Eddie.”
It still hits him like a slap in the face. Steve’s done with him. And it hurts so much more than he anticipated it would. 
Eddie knew it was only a matter of time. He knew what Steve wanted in the end, and it was still someone more like Wheeler. A sweetheart. A family. Nothing Eddie can guarantee. Eddie doesn’t have much to say in his defense. So he doesn’t. 
"I'm sorry Eddie,” Steve, obviously uncomfortable in the silence, speaks again. “This is just, too much for me right now.”
"Okay,” comes out of Eddie’s numb mouth, even if it's the complete opposite. 
Eddie knew a clean break now would eventually be better than enduring their relationship fizzling out slowly. But it doesn't mean the inevitable failure of one more relationship doesn't hurt.
-two months later-
“Munson?”
Eddie blinks, of all the people to find him, here, he didn't think it would be Californian transplant, and fellow trailer trash bad boy Billy Hargrove from Hawkins. He just wants to disappear into the pavement. 
Eddie’s feet move to sprint, but Billy’s lighting reflexes catch him before he can. 
“Where the hell are you going now, Eddie?”
Eddie rips away from him. He hates the way his name sounds out loud. He hadn’t felt like ‘Eddie’ in weeks. He’s barely felt like anything. More like Nothing and no one. A nameless face in a sea of sex workers, businessmen, and bar patrons that he cycled through every day. 
“It’s none of your damn business,” Eddie spits, though it doesn't have much venom. He doesn't have the energy. He's sick, he’s cold, and he’s so fucking tired. He still has two more clients he can’t blow off tonight if he wants to have a prayer at ever getting unburied under his last hospital bill. Billy Hargrove and Hawkins and all that past shit is his lowest priority.  
“People are worried man,” Billy says, stopping Eddie from taking more than a step away. “Wayne especially. Don't you give a shit about him?”
Now Eddie is pissed, because who the fuck did Billy Hargrove think he was, telling him about what he should do? Talking to him about Wayne. As if he understood a goddamn thing about their lives! His anger flairs up his cough that only aggravates the pneumonia-scarred tissue and then Eddie’s coughing so hard it nearly knocks him over. 
When Billy moves close to ‘help’ Eddie slaps him off. 
“Everything I’m doing is for him! You don’t fucking know shit, Billy! How could you, you're just a kid!”
And while Billy was 17 and Eddie was 6 months into his 23rd lap around the earth, he felt so much older. His tragic sequence of life events had aged him decades. He’d be lucky to make it to 24 at this rate. 
Billy watches him curiously, putting together pieces Eddie doesnt mean him to. 
“Why did you take off Eddie?” 
“Why do you care?” Eddie doesn’t really think it's concern he sees in Billy's features. 
“Wayne doesn't have anyone else. You scared the shit out of him when you left.”
“Oh and what, you two are bffs now,” Eddie asks bitterly. 
Billy shrugged. 
“We've been spending a lot of time together, yeah.”
Eddie scoffs wetly. Fantastic. Now even Wayne has his own Eddie replacement. A better, nicer son. If Wayne didn’t need him anymore, well, he didn’t have any more ties back to Hawkins. He should be relieved, but instead he just feels empty. Forgotten. Unwanted. Billy had said people missed him, but the only name he offered up was Wayne’s.  
Eddie sniffs up the tears threatening to spill and reaches into his jacket. He takes out the seven hundred dollars and change he’s managed to squirrel away after his last AZT prescription refill and holds it out to Billy. 
“What is this?” Billy looks at the wad like its poisoned, and well, he's not entirely wrong, it's certainly dirty money. But its still green. And that’s all the world runs on. And speaking of money, the man he was currently scheduled to suck off is honking at him from across the parking lot, eyeing Billy with violent intent. Eddie needed to move quick before this escalated. 
“I’m not coming back. T-To Hawkins, I mean. I can’t, so I need you to give this to Wayne for me. Can I trust you to get it to him?”
Billy finally takes the money, counts it, and then his jaw drops. 
“There’s over seven hundred dollars here Eddie.”
“I know,” Eddie sighs dejectedly. “It should have been more but,” but you got stupid and believed some pretty, coked-up twink instead of following your gut. And now you get to live with the weight of that decision, forever… “It doesn’t matter. Just, please make sure he gets it. It should cover the next few payments on the trailer.”
Billy looks at him for a long time. 
“What the hell have you been doing Munson?”
Eddie scoffs before the car horn across the street blares loud, startling him right out of his skin. 
“Nothing you want to know about. Just please make sure he gets it, and knows, I’m sorry. For all of it.”
Billy’s eyes lower suspiciously. 
“Why does this sound like a goodbye?”
Eddie shrugs.
“Because it has to be.” Eddie can’t feel anything below his neck anymore. The honk is starting up again. He’s really pushing his luck now. 
“Eddie, come on,” Hargrove begs and why does it sound like he’s actually pleading? Billy’s never had a nice word to say to him or Steve. And now he’s gone for what, a few weeks, and his enemy wants to become best friends? He doesn’t understand this plotline. He’s ready to get out of it. 
“I’m gotta go, Billy. Please, look out for Wayne.”
Eddie leaves the very next minute and sprints across the street, just narrowly avoiding being hit by the semi that blasts his horn.
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snail-day · 5 months ago
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Hehe why hello there my beloved Snail. Ngl girl you have no reason to be apologetic about not proofreading your response because I was highkey cringing at all the typos I made when I read through the message I sent last night (still can’t believe I sent it to you like that my bad) *sighs* that’s what I get for rambling before bed. Alas it’s when I get the time to be insane on tumblr. Regardless, THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING ALL MY QUESTIONS!!! I did want answers but I didn’t mean to send so many😭, I really hope that didn’t take you too long. No because our interactions got me smiling, giggling, twirling my hair and kicking my feet. I got hearts in my eyes if you didn’t notice😍 THE ZOOMIES GO BOTH WAYS. I may not be running five miles (damn girl🫦) but I was walking around and zoning out to my playlist and now I gotta collapse after 15k steps today. Your responses are like a little treat in the morning I LOVE waking up to them, and this is so wonderfully fun!!!! This is what tumblr should always be about fr🥹.
Now I wanted to say this yesterday but it completely slipped my mind because all my neurons decided to detonate at the same time. I think it was one of your older asks, about how Geto would never fully trust a darling that would completely submit to him without fighting back. You learn a lot about somebody when they snap and I really love the way you reversed that with Suguru as the affectionate husband and reader being unable to trust him without ever seeing him express any type of confrontational behavior. Because in truth every girl wants the perfect man until she realizes she doesn’t know him at all behind the carefully curated mask. This would prompt me to ask if reader ever brought this up before serving the divorce papers? But then again I feel like he would just dismiss her feelings while saying something like his true nature is to lover her or something while kissing up her neck. Wasn’t expecting the mental hospital route in the medical AU but such a delectable surprise nonetheless. UGH ITS WRONGFUL IMPRISONMENT BUT WORSE!!! But you’re right Snail ehehe I think you should write another medical fic with our babygirl… IM NOT NORMALLY THIS GREEDY I SWEAR WAHHHH JUST TELL ME YOU SEE THE VISION. The blood draw scene, darling who avoids doctors on purpose, Satosugu trying to catch you up on all your vaccines (they’re really just sedatives to make you cute and relxed), THE HOME VISITS YOU MENTIONED😭Your writing is doing things to me and I can’t help it!!! In all seriousness though do whatever your heart desires, take a break even, you spoil me too much😂. I eagerly await the epilogue of Hysteria because I need to know how this one ends. You mentioned it may or may not have a happy ending and I won’t lie I don’t know how this is going to end up as happy unless she forgets all the events both leading up to and at the hospital and gets to go home in an ignorant bliss. Can’t wait to see how you’re going to do it!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHH MY IDOL WANTS MY DISCORD REAL?!?!?!!! I’ll DM you trust. Very embarrassing bc you’re going to see my account and notice I just followed you. I promise I’m a real fan I’m just like this with every blog I follow. NO KIDNEY NECESSARY YOU’VE GIVEN SO MUCH ALREADY!! Though hehe if you wanna give me your heart I wouldn’t mind *batting my eyelashes at you btw* love you lots and as always have a splendid night or day or whatever time you usually get my messages!!
-Your silly zoomy 💖
AHHHH!!! Hi 💖 baby!!
I'll give you my heart 🥺🩷 (Sorry to everyone that sees us flirt every day)
In terms of the pre-divorce: You're very spot on with Geto's character!! Their marriage was very stable, while reader is having doubts of trust because well never seeing your partner get angry....is odd. Anger doesn't mean abusive, it's an emotion we all feel! So always having him be the calm person would just be annoying.
There are definitely some drawbacks of predivorce. They're both in the medical field. Which means there's days or sometimes a whole week when they can't see each other...plus Geto kept asking reader if she could move to his hospital since he doesn't really like her working in the ER (crazy stuff happens all the time) and he's not sure what he'd do if he lost his wife because a patient freaked out, someone walking in with a gun/bomb, someone thinking his wife is hot and kidnapping her. So when reader constantly says no, he does get a little frustrated but never shows it. Just flashes reader that sweet polite smile and says "okay angel" when in reality he's having a freak out.
Obviously, they had their sexual issues, and I just think those came up from life. Not seeing each other often and are exhausted from the work week. Other than that, it's pretty normal. They'd travel with Satoru, sometimes Shoko. Go on dates, visit reader parents (not his), cuddle on the couch, and watch something reader wants. He also makes reader's lunch every day in a cute bento box.
OKAY so
I lied not really happy ending??? But epilogue should be out Sunday or Monday at the latest. It's not as bad as TiLR. Maybe that could change
Love you 💖 baby!!!
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verybouquetgay · 5 months ago
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I woke up to the birds
Laying on my back my head groggy, I lean over slightly to grab my glasses pawing at my desk to try to get them with my hand. I sit up and I put them on, adjusting my stomach so I can sit more comfortably. The birds were always a wake up call, I guess that's the good and the bad of living in the middle of nowhere. When my eyes unfuz and I feel a little bit more awake, I go to try to stand.
My cats ready for breakfast come to me yelling, I check the time it's only a few minutes past six.
"Ladies you know you get fed at 6 30, I'm gonna go to the washroom and when I'm done, I'll feed you I promise."
After i'm done in the washroom, I look at myself in the mirror. It's only been a few years, but the testosterone has definitely changed how I look at myself. Finding this place to call home so I feel safe has been an interesting journey, my heart aches, knowing that i'm too anxious to interact with others simply because since I transitioned, I could not be what my soul mate expects.
I'm scared for the day where I can finally see color, ( the sign that I found my soulmate because currently, all I can see is black and white.) because what if I get rejected by the person who is supposed to love me no matter what. As convenient as it is to have something that could tell you, who will eventually love you, it's scary knowing that I don't look anything like they might expect.
The cats meow loudly again, reminding me what i'm supposed to be doing.
" Yes, yes, yes, oh my ladies, my sweet babies. I know it's breakfast. I'm sorry. I was just thinking."
" No matter what you guys will love me, right? and that's all that matters. it would be nice to see what color you guys are though."
I cook my self some eggs and put some coffee on to brew while the kitties chow down. It's going to be a long day of peopling so I need my energy and strength. I grab some water to take my pills, sitting at the counter, I reach for my pill box.
"Crystal what's the temperature?"
"Good morning Tobias it's plus ten right now with a high of 24 for the day.
The little robot a comfort that I have chosen, "she's not a real person but it helps when I feel alone" I think to my self.
I go and get dressed finally, putting on a typical outfit of shorts and a crop top. Ever since I got top surgery Crop tops are my favorite to wear, it doesn't matter how you look they always look good.
"I think Im Ready for the day, phone? wallet?Keys? A kiss on the kitty's heads? Check check check and double check okay I think i'm good to go!"
I'm very tempted to stay home, but I need groceries, and I have another vial of testosterone I need to pick up.
I drive through the countryside in my old ford fiasco, the way to this city is always so pretty. with many fields and birds, Occasionally, I get to see other animals like, opossums and deer and bears. My favorite are the sunflowers I get to see, they aren't quite in bloom, but it's almost fall so they will be soon.
As I pull up to the Shooper mart, I look around to try to find a spot. I'm having a good pain day, but I don't want to jinx it Getting a faraway spot.
I use my cart key to grab a cart from the cart, shed outside the store. Fumbling over it with my hands, not quite pushing it all the way in. Finally, i'm able to grab the cart and I go to head inside.
As I walk up and down the aisles I don't notice it all at once, but there's little pieces of what I can assume is color!
" Damn it not today"
I don't want to meet them today! I'm not ready! I rush through my groceries, slowly seeing all of the things that I would normally buy illuminated by the fact that I could truly see them, how i'm supposed to.
"Eggs crackers milk a frozen dinners for bad days, cheese, peanut butter bread muffins noodles pasta sauce meat." I go through the list of my grocery's a loud.
The longer i'm here, the more vivid things are. I go to the toy section, hoping to dull the color as well as thinking I can pick out a new action figure.
But it gets brighter when I get closer, which makes me panic even more. So I head over to the pharmacy, hoping I can just grabbing all my stuff and go. But my soulmate must have been trying to figure out where I was.
Because, as I wait for my prescription a tall beautiful girl wearing a cat on her shirt also approached the pharmacist. She didn't see me at first, but I definitely saw her, she also looked panicked her brows furrowing, disturbing her otherwise delicate features.
" Hey! I was wondering if I could pick up my estrogen prescription? I am in a bit of a hurry."
" Sorry, there's someone in front of you in line, but you can just wait over there and I can help you as soon as possible."
She turns to approach me the only other person in line, and as her face turns We lock eyes.
The next few moments were the most beautiful I had ever experienced, a wave of color washed over the world. For the first time, I was truly seeing everything how it was supposed to be seen. In front of me, the beautiful girl who caused it.
"Hi" she said trying to hide her face with her hand.
"Hi" I said still admiring her, every second I look at her, the more I truly get to see her, and I am in awe. So much so that for a split second, my anxiety is put on hold.
" Tobias your testosterone prescription is ready" says the pharmacist snapping me back to the reality.
"Are you, are you also trans?" The girl asks. " oh my God, that's so stupid. I'm so sorry you don't need to tell me that." She quickly follows up with.
Suddenly, every fear that I ever had about finding my one are gone. If this beautiful woman in front of me can accept me. love me for who I am without Considering what I was born as then maybe everything's gonna be okay.
" i am I am trans, and you are the most stunning thing i've ever seen" i say to her and smile.
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velvetboyette · 2 years ago
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We haven't gotten anything as of 10am EST this morning
We're both disabled and trying to move out of a hoarding situation that is several decades old with no help (my mom just left and told us to me pack and meet her)
We both have autism and AFRID so the food pantry is of so much more wasteful that it is helpful not to mention we don't have a phone number rn and they are incredibly aggressive when you don't make an appointment and don't have a bunch of paper work proving you make some kind of income - my wife literally doesn't and they began to interrogate her last time she was there and will only give 3 days of food to people with proven income and a prior appointment. So we'd only get 3 days of food for me because I have SSDI paperwork and that's 1 day of food for being hareased by a religious woman who is openly judging us for being queer and poor in her presence
We survive mainly through sexwork most of which is legal but I'm def not bringing the chaterbate paperwork to the religious lady and telling her my transgender wife is employed THAT I'd rather starve than do I'm honestly sorry they also make me take home food I have no way to cook or store taking up valuable fridge space for like a Christmas fucking ham sorry something so I can watch good food rot.
I live in a wealthy district in NY state with 0 queer outreach/ aid programs all of them are religiously affiliated and I'm really really really trying to avoid taking us to conservative churches because we are both visibly disabled GNC and queer. I just am literally on my knees begging not to have to to those places and go through that after growing up in the Baptist church of all the vile places just to not actually get any food that I can eat or even cook to attempt to gag down
I know im on here another asking for money I make just under 1k in on SSDI in NY and I make 61$ exactly in EBT
My wife is doing her very best best but there's only so much porn you can make in a decapitated house with barley any light. Not to mention the blanket rejection she's been receiving from normal day jobs Shea been applying for 2 years since she came to live here after being kicked out onto the street in Connecticut in November and she has had 1 call back from mens fucking warehouse of all places and the interviewer never followed up.
I would give anything to stay afloat if you want porn I will give you porn if you want art I will make you art I can write and draw
I'm really beyond the point of begging I don't think very many people have any money to give but 100$ right now for groceries would mean the world to me
I've become a regular e-beggar because THATS THE ONLY THING THAT BINGS US INCOME! I've tried everything! Prostitution to fucking McDonalds IM SO FUCKING TIRED SO TIRED OF ASKING MY FRIENDS TO REBLOG MY STUPID FUCKING POSTS ABOUT HOW HUNGRY I AM
IM TRIED OF BEING TOO DISABLED FOR MANUAL LABOR AND TOO VISIBLY QUEER FOR PUBLIC JOBS
I'm sorry I'm so upset I'm so tired of running out of food before the 10th of the month my life wasn't like this before the police arrested my father and refused him trial for a half decade
Please keep reblogging this so someone who has anything extra sees this
EVERY DOLLAR COUNTS
WE NEED FOOD (and honestly soap but fuck me I'll figure that one out I'll just steal the goddamn soap fuck it)
Running low on food if anyone wants to send some $$ moving is fucking exaughsting and I don't have the spoons to beg correctly
I love you all so much
Lumophobia on ppl/cshapp
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mooshrada · 2 years ago
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Jack in the Box x Reader
You were driving through the city's roadway in the morning at 7:00, it was a relaxing and peaceful morning for you, no traffic, no cars honking at you, just a happy drive for you.
Suddenly you saw a big bill board that says "Enjoy my BOWLS", "what kind of advertising is that?" You chuckled as you asked yourself that, you noticed that it was a restaurant ad, and the restaurant was called 'Jack in the Box', i guess you could try and eat at a new restaurant, maybe you will like their new good looking foods.
You went to the restaurant which is near to the city's park, you parked your car in the parking lot, and get your bag, and went inside the restaurant, it has only small amount of people in here, you notice someone with a a big red smile, and a yellow hat, it looks like they work here since they are behind the counter, you also noticed that he looked at you in an admiring way.
"H-hello! And welcome to Jack in the box, would you like to dine in, or take me- I-i mean take out!"
"Dine in please, i would like Loaded Breakfast Sandwhich and a hot coffee please."
"R-right away!"
That was unusual, first the stare and the stuttering, you go to a vacant table with a window and sat on a chair waiting for your order, while waiting you look to the right to admire the park's nature, after about 6 minutes, you got your order by the same man that listened to your choice of the menu.
"Enjoy your food!"
" don't worry, i will."
You smiled as you said that in the end, and noticed the man blsuhed as you did that.
"By the way, whats your name?"
You were the one asking that question
"M-my name is Jack, i am the owner of this restaurant obviosly, like didn't you see my billboard?"
"Oh, i thought you are just some random employee that got the act to pose for the bill board, sorry about that."
"Its ok, i know i could just go into my office and work as a guide to my employees, but i decided to work as a normal worker here."
"Oh i see, well why don' t you sit down, theres only a few people here, how about we just talk about things?"
You and Jack talked about a lot of things for only like 30 minutes, you talked about you and Jack do things daily, and both of your likings and dislikings.
"Hey jack can i order another hot coffee, i think i need to go sadly."
" Oh don't worry, you probably have some busy things to do, i'll get your hot coffee in no time!"
He went back behind to the counter to get your hot coffee ready, you stare back to the window to check in the park again, you start to think that you and Jack are good friends to each other.
Jack got the hot coffee for you, you stand up and put the cash for the meal on the table, you grabbed the hot coffee grom Jacks hands, you slightly blushed from it, so does Jack.
"Well i gotta go now Jack, don't worry i'll come back mayhe tomorrow or after 2 days!"
" See you later.. "
As you went out the restaurant you notice a handwriting on your coffee, it said..
' you are Hot like this coffee, lets hang out more often'
There was also a winky face emoticon in the end of the phrase, you blushed slightly a lot on your face, and you hope that you would come back in his restaurant.
Bonus:
(This is Jacks POV)
* HOLY HECK WHO ARE THEY, THEY LOOK AMAZING, IS THIS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT OR JUST SOME RANDOM THOUGHT??? *
* DAMN I CANT BELIVE IM TALKING WITH THEM, WOW THEY LOOK SO AMZING IN THIS VIEW *
* I CANT BELIEVE THEY ARE GOING ALREADY, HOPEFULLY THEY WILL COME BACK UGHHH *
* alright all i have to do is just write a message that will make them like me or something *
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heartache-otbs · 2 years ago
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daylight - lrh (songfic)
an: this song is stuck in my head and i figured it'd be an ouchie fic so im sorry
summary: songfic, daylight by maroon 5 (first verse / chorus)
pairing: luke hemmings x reader
warnings: angst maybe? it's sad.
word count: 767
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Here I am waiting, I have to leave soon. Why am I holding on?
Luke lays under the cool silk sheets, your body close to his as he lightly caresses your face under the moonlight. He can't sleep.
He hasn't been able to sleep for weeks. He's been stressing about going off on tour, without you. He loved his job, he loved travelling the world and he loved his fans.
But he also hates his job, because it takes him away from you.
Tomorrow is the day he has to leave, you had fallen asleep pretty early, tired from helping him back and prepare. So Luke had been staring at you for hours, memorizing what your face looked like and touching every square inch of skin he could, trying to hold on to you.
We knew this day would come, we knew it all along. How did it come so fast?
Luke doesn't know why he's desperately trying to hold onto you when this day was inevitable, how could he be so upset when this day had been coming for months? Shouldn't have he accepted it by now?
He thought it was just yesterday that he came home to you, announcing that he could finally go back on tour after the pandemic. How happy you two were and how proud you were of Luke. There was so much love and happiness in that moment, yet that memory in Luke's mind has faded into a blue hue of hidden regret.
It's too soon. Luke begins having second thoughts. I can't leave.
This is our last night, but it's late. And I'm trying not to sleep. Because I know when I wake, I will have to slip away.
Luke has hit the point of exhaustion, he can barely keep his eyes open but he refuses to go to sleep. The moment he wakes up he has to get in the car and get on the road, you couldn't take him because you had a school priority that you couldn't get out of.
"That's okay," Luke had sighed when you told him that you wouldn't be able to see him off "you need to do what ya need to do YN"
Inside he was torn to shreds, knowing he couldn't kiss you at the gate made him not want to go through it.
So Luke kisses you now, soft kisses all over your face while you sleep, his soft lips lingering on your warm skin every few seconds as he makes sure to kiss every inch.
And when the daylight comes I'll have to go, but tonight I'm gonna hold you so close. Because in daylight we'll be on our own. But tonight I'm gonna hold you so close.
You actually cried so much before bed. Once Luke got in the shower, you lost it. You were in such hysterics that Luke heard you from the bathroom and came out to comfort you, tears escaping his face as well.
As you held each other, Luke kept promising that he was never going to let you go. That he'd never let anything come between the two of you, that he'd hold you forever if he needed to. He made a slight joke that he wouldn't go if it made you stop crying.
Was it really a joke though?
What the big thing was about the next day, was that you two had never necessarily been separated for each other for a long period of time. You two had gotten together right before the pandemic started, so you spent all of your time at each other's houses. Moved in together pretty quickly, he hadn't gone anywhere for work and if he did you went with him, because of the pandemic you had online school.
But now with societal normalities back in place, you and Luke had to be separated from each other. Something that you both would have to learn how to deal with.
You two really didn't know how to exist without the other one on hand, some would say it was an unhealthy codependency but you and Luke were just happy.
What would you even do without Luke? It'd be so quiet. So empty. You'd no longer have his comfort coming back from class. No more making pancakes for him on Saturday mornings. Your routine will be all out of sorts, what will make up for it?
You tried not to think about it once it crossed your mind, instead, you let Luke hold you as you drifted off, sinking into the last night you had him next to you, dreading the daylight.
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m7nson · 3 years ago
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Neighbor -> Joseph Quinn
˙❥˙ Your new neighbor is really sweet, but your shirt is ruined
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A/n : this is a little cliche but :)
Not edited yet bc I'm tired-
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You thought moving to London would be fun! Get to go and experience something new and already having a job it cant be that hard you just have to get to know the place!Yet you've been here for a month.. and you still have no idea where a coffee shop is.
Rushing to get out the door, thankful you don't have to take the bus or else you would have been screwed. Rushing out the door and of course something bumps into you. And now you're covered in your coffee and. Gasping at the burring coffee, thankfully you like your coffee warm but your cream shirt was ruined...
"Oh… ’M sorry, didn’t realize you were there." You can't even see the man face, struggling to juggle two boxes.
"here — let me help you!" You grabbed the top box and we're met with dreamy hazel eyes. "Hi" you said smiling. He gave a little sweet smile "hello.. I think I'm your neighbor?"
"Oh that's great! Welcome to the complex!" You said as you two walked to his front door and put the box down. He smiled and looked down at your shirt. "Oh, Jesus im so sorry about your shirt and coffee.."
You looked down at your shirt "It's ok accidents happen all the time!" Picking up your crushed styrofoam cup.
"I'll make it up to you soon I promise! I should probably stop talking before I take up more of your time.. and thank you for your help!" He said rushing the boxes through the door and closing it.
"...Your welcome?"
'Shit..'
Here you are the next morning late for work rushing on putting your shoes. Instead of running out the door you walked out like a normal person.
As soon as you locked your door you realized you forgot your coffee. 'Guess no coffee for me today..' before walking away you saw the door next to you open.
It was the same handsome neighbor you saw yesterday. Holding two styrofoam cups, "Hello!" He said walking to you, "Good morning! I don't think I ever got your name yesterday?"
"Joseph, Joseph Quinn. But you can call me Joe." He tried to hold his hand out but the two cups were stopping him.
"Y/n, L/n! It's nice to meet you!" You said smiling shaking his fingers. "This is for you." Handing you a coffee cup.
"Oh — thank you so much, I didn't make coffee today so thank you!" He nodded "I don't know how you like your coffee but I put two spoons of sugar."
You chuckled. "This is very sweet of you thank you! One day do you think you can show me where this coffee shop is?"
He nodded, "It's right across the street" he smiles "but yeah of course!" You smiled "Ok I have to go before I get fired, but I'll see you later, yeah?" He nodded.
You sighed softly, finally in your desk. You took a sip out of your coffee and smiled nice and warm. You wondered if he was waiting at his door for you to come out.
"Well isn't someone in a good mood — hm?" You're friend, Anita said sitting on your desk, you chuckled. She looked at your cup and raised her eyebrows "Joe huh? And there's a phone number on it." Confused you looked at the cup.
Call me! :) ××× - ××× - ××××
"So who is it?" She asked crossing her arms over her plaid light yellow and brown shirt. You rolled your eyes "He's my new neighbor." Her eyes lit up. "Is he cute at least?"
You thought back, he is very handsome and almost dreamy. His face reminds you of something.. or someone but you can't quite place it.
"He's very handsome, and he has very pretty eyes." She gave you a look. You laughed "what?" She smirked "you like him don't you?" You rolled your eyes.
"I've only met him two days ago and I haven't even fully had a conversation with him." She hummed getting of your desk "but he bought you a coffee to be.. kind? And give you his number because?..."
You sighed defeated and took a sip out of your coffee. She laughed walking back to her desk.
Here you are in the evening pacing in front of your phone, debating on calling him. 'What if it's the barista number.. oh my god, what if it is...'
Well.. only one way to find out. Sitting down on the couch and calling the number. It rang three time and then you heard — "Hello?"
"Joe hi!"
"Y/n, I'm happy you called!"
"Yeah! I usually call my mom around this time so I thought that I'll call you instead!" 'oh my god why would you say that' you cringed.
He chuckled "Well I'm glad you called me."
"So.. this weekend you want to show me that coffee shop?"
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mendessi · 2 years ago
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the moon and the stars
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pairing: joel miller x fem!oc
summary: you're with the millers on the day of the outbreak and it tears you apart that you couldn't help save sarah
word count: 5.2k
warnings: canon typical violence, death, no smut in this one sorry, soft joel, dad joel, literal heartbreak, mentions of sex, she’s a nurse
author's note: i held off as long as i could but now im writing something ab joel miller what can i say? also i dont ever really write y/n, im more of an oc kind of gal but feel free to replace the oc name with your own if it makes you happy (:
minors DNI
"Is he awake?" Celeste asked as she peaked her head into the Miller residence.
"He's still sleeping. His alarm has been going off for like five minutes." Sarah replied. Celeste made her way to Sarah and kissed her cheek. "I'm gonna start breakfast. We're having pancakes."
"He doesn't like pancakes." She said pouring the coffee grounds into the coffee maker so it would be fresh when Joel came downstairs. She wasn't a coffee drinker but her boyfriend was.
"We do, though." Sarah smiled cheekily and she returned one back to her.
"I'll go get him up." Celeste said making her way up the stairs towards Joel's bedroom. She sighed at the fact that his alarm was indeed still going off. The man would sleep through an earthquake if he had the opportunity. Luckily for him they weren't much a threat in Austin, Texas.
Celeste had been seeing Joel for almost a year now since he came into the ER, needing stitches from an accident he had on a job sight. Joel couldn't stop flirting and the fact that Celeste refused to give in to him made him want her more. He only flirted because the thought of a needle going in and out of his skin made him want to squirm and the pretty face in front of him was a nice distraction. Her soft voice helped ease his nerves, Joel didn't typically go out and look for relationships prior to Celeste, more so for the sake of Sarah, but he couldn't help it. Celeste was stunning, "the most stunning to ever step foot in Austin" Joel would tell her. By the time she brought him his release forms, she couldn't help but agree to a date.
She moved to Austin to obtain her RN at the University of Texas from Seattle and ended up falling in love with the city so she decided to stay and get a job at the local hospital as a trauma nurse in the emergency room. Luckily she did or she would've never met Joel in the ER that day.
"Baby, wake up." She shut off the alarm and crawled into bed next to a shirtless Joel who lazily wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into his chest. They lay like that for a moment, enjoying each other's presence before they had to get up for the day. He appreciated this as their morning routine, she’d stop by in the morning and they’d have breakfast together before work. His eyes slowly fluttered open and a sleepy smile perched on his lips as he looked at her.
"Mornin, beautiful." He said to her, brushing her hair from her face.
"Happy birthday." She leaned forward placing a soft kiss on his lips to which he moved closer to her, his hand trailing up and down her thigh. She ran her fingers through his hair once she pulled away.
"Gotta get up." He huffed, throwing the blankets off of himself. He pecked her lips three times and on the fourth one he didn't pull away, grateful that her kiss was how he was woken up on his birthday.
She crawled out of bed and leaned against the door while he grabbed his clothes for the day. Celeste watched him change with her arms crossed over her body, a small smile on her lips. Once he finished, she pulled the door open and the two of them made their way downstairs. Joel couldn't help giving her a love tap on her butt as she rounded the corner to which she glared at him.
"Scrubs." He shrugged, a playful smile tugging at his lips. It was no secret that Joel loved when Celeste was dressed for work, normally in blue or black scrubs that hugged her body just right.
They entered the kitchen to discover that Sarah was standing at the stove making scrambled eggs. Joel must've forgotten to grab a box at the most previous grocery trip.
"Where's the pancake mix?" Sarah asked.
"Oh, was I... I was. Sorry." Joel sighed walking towards the cabinet to get a mug.
"I was gonna make you birthday pancakes." She sighed adding under her breath, "I swear."
"You know, I don't really like pancakes." He said reaching for the coffee pot.
"I know you don't like them. It was for our benefit." Sarah said grabbing the orange juice from the fridge and pouring a glass for Joel. Celeste couldn't help but smile at Joel's reaction to Sarah holding the glass out to him. "Vitamin C."
Joel nodded and took a big sip from the glass and she did her best to not snicker at the face he made while drinking it.
"Give it." She said quietly, and he gladly slid the glass across the counter towards her. She picked it up and took a sip, shooting him a wink. He reached up and cupped her face, brushing his thumb across her cheek.
"Love you." He mouthed and even after hearing it a million times over the last six months since he first said it, it still made her blush.
She stood on her tippy toes and kissed him quickly before Sarah turned around and he reached for her hand once she pulled away. Celeste always tried to keep the PDA minimal around Sarah, despite Sarah exclaiming she didn't care if they kissed in front of her. Celeste was grateful that Sarah liked her, it was the one thing she was most afraid of when she found out that Joel had a daughter. Sarah loved Celeste and always begged the question when she'd move in or when they'd get married to which the couple never had a direct answer.
The trio sat around the table eating the eggs that Sarah had spent the morning cooking. She wasn't bad at cooking to say the least, but you could only make scrambled eggs so many different ways.
"So how old are you again?" Sarah asked.
"Thirty six." "Old." Joel and Celeste replied at the same time. Sarah giggled as Joel glared at Celeste.
"We can't all be hot, young nurses." Joel said.
"I'm twenty-six, I'm not that young." Celeste rolled her eyes.
"I'm twenty-six, I'm not that young." Joel mocked her very much not southern accent, something he loved to tease her about. Being from the Pacific Northwest was about as far from southern you could get.
"Gonna have to wear diapers soon." Sarah said to her dad, earning a burst of laughter from Celeste.
"Who says I don't already?" Joel fired back and then pulled something from his mouth, "Shell."
"Calcium." Sarah replied and then shoved the eggs in her mouth through her teeth.
"Lovely." Joel sighed while Celeste continued laughing.
"I gotta run." Celeste stood up from her chair and brought her dishes to the sink where she quickly rinsed them off.
"Is there enough for Uncle Tommy?" Joel asked.
"Well, there would've been."
"Bye, baby." Celeste leaned down and stole one last birthday kiss from Joel despite Sarah sitting in front of them.
"Be safe." Joel replied. He grabbed her hand as she was walking away and pulled her back towards him, wrapping his arm around her waist from where he sat in the chair. "Love you."
"Love you." She smiled and waved goodbye to Sarah as she passed Tommy on her way out. "Have a good day everyone."
"What?" Joel asked when he noticed Sarah staring at him with a smug smile after Celeste disappeared behind the garage door.
"It's just nice seeing you two." Sarah replied, standing to grab their plates off of the table. "She takes care of you and I like that."
"Takes care of me?" Joel asked.
"The coffee, the orange juice. I'm happy you have her." She said. "I'm just saying, when I'm off to college it's nice to know she'll be here taking care of you."
"College is a long ways away." Joel stood up and looked at his phone. "C'mon."
The day went by normally, as normally as it could in the ER. Austin was full of people who never knew when to quit drinking, especially this close to the city. Celeste's day was busy but was normal. The later in the day it got, the more hectic it got. Multiple people started coming in with symptoms like she had never seen before. It wasn't just a few, it was at least a dozen and by the time another hour had passed the number had tripled. She felt bad leaving but she had a co-worker coming in to cover the last half of her shift so she could spend the evening with Joel and Sarah.
"I'm just going to insert your IV, you'll feel a little prick but it'll be done fairly quickly." Celeste sat on a rolly stool next to a patient's bed, prepping his arm for the IV.
As soon as she inserted the needle into his arm, the man yelled and shot up from where he was laying in bed, his fist connecting with her jaw. The sudden outburst shocked her and caused her to fall backwards off of her chair. The man, in a matter of seconds, was on top of Celeste. The other nurses heard the commotion and quickly came to her aide, sedating the man who had attacked her out of nowhere.
"This has to be connected with what's going on in Indonesia." Belle said to her as they stood at the nurse's station. They both were flipping through patient charts, trying to connect dots.
"What's going on in Indonesia?" Celeste asked, holding the ice pack to her jaw.
"Some virus. Making people insane. Eating each other or something crazy. I don't know, it's probably all just fake news anyways." Belle sighed.
"Hey, sorry I'm late. I think my boyfriend is coming down with some type of cold or something." Jenny rushed behind the desk and put her things in her drawer. "You look like you had a rough day so I'm officially relieving you of your duty."
"Yeah, I should head out before I'm asked to stay longer anyways with all this chaos going on." Celeste pushed the stack of charts towards Jenny and grabbed her belongings from behind the desk.
"What do you got going on tonight, anyways?" Belle asked.
"Boyfriend's birthday." She replied.
"Oh, the scandal that will be. Have fun." Jenny winked and shoved Celeste towards the door.
By the time she reached the Miller residence the sun had already set. She used her spare key to open the door and let herself in. Sarah was sitting in the living room watching Lilo and Stitch: The Series on Disney Channel.
"Hey," Celeste sighed collapsing on the couch next to Sarah. "How was school?"
"What happened to your face?" She asked.
"A patient attacked me today. It's fine."
"Dad's gonna flip out when he sees. He made me go to the Adler's after school." She sighed. "But look." Sarah grabbed the box and showed Celeste the watch she had fixed for Joel.
"He's gonna love it." Celeste smiled, looking down at the ticking arms.
"You think so?" She asked.
"Duh. It's from you, that's an automatic win to anything I could've got him." She replied.
"What did you get him?" Sarah asked her.
"Nothing. He made me swear to no gifts 'or else'." Celeste said making Sarah laugh at her use of air quotes. Joel did make Celeste swear to no gifts but her gift was just going to be extremely hot and steamy birthday sex, but Sarah didn't need to know that.
"I really like you, Celeste. I think you're really good for my dad." Sarah said after a few minutes of silence.
"I really like you too, Sarah. And I really do love your dad." She replied, looking down at the girl next to her.
"I think I wouldn't mind you being my step-mom." She said.
"Well, maybe one day I will be." Celeste couldn't stop the smile that crept onto her face. She slung her arm around Sarah and the two bundled up under a blanket to finish watching Lilo and Stitch.
The clock was approaching ten when they heard Joel's keys jingle into the lock. He had swore to be home by nine at the latest but obviously that wasn't the case.
"You locked the door for once." Joel said as he joined them in the living room.
"Yeah." Sarah said. "It's ten."
Celeste stood up to greet Joel with a kiss and then sat back down on the other side of the couch.
"They gave us the wrong size for the headers- that doesn't mean anything to you, I'm sorry. What the hell happened to your face?" Joel tilted her face so he could see it better in the dim light.
"A patient hit me today, it's fine. Just a bruise." She moved his hand from her face and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
"Where's the cake?"
"Shit." He muttered under his breath.
"C'mon man."
Celeste's phone buzzed and she stood up to take the call in the kitchen.
"Hello?"
"Celeste, you have to get down here, it's fucking chaos-"
"What? It's Friday, everyone is heading into the city at this time to drink, it'd take me like an hour." She said. She could barely hear what Belle was saying over the noises in the background. She swore she heard screams at some point.
"No, no, no. We need all the hands we can get, the patients are- fuck- sir, back up please! Shit!"
"Belle? Belle? Hello? Fuck." The line went dead and she went back to the living room. "I gotta head back into work."
"What? No." Sarah pouted. "Stay please. We're gonna watch a movie."
"Yeah baby, stay. I don't want you on the roads at this time, people already been drinkin." Joel held his hand out and she couldn't help but take it and sit down next to him.
"Fine, but if they call again I'll have to go in."
"Deal."
Barely an hour into the movie, Joel found himself with the two girls he loved most in his life passed out asleep on him. An urge of protectiveness flooded him and he knew in that moment that Sarah and Celeste were his to love and protect no matter what. It was almost in that moment he decided he'd propose to Celeste before the year ended. The thought almost completed itself until his phone rang with Tommy's number flashing across the tiny screen. After a brief conversation with Tommy, Joel was extremely annoyed with the fact that once again he'd be bailing his little brother out of jail.
He tapped Celeste's leg gently until she woke up and kissed her head when she opened her eyes, "I gotta go bail Tommy out, can you stay with Sarah?"
"Of course." She knew not to ask questions when it came to Tommy in jail.
"I'm gonna bring her to her room, you head to bed, yeah?" He lifted Sarah into his arms and together they walked up the stairs. She crawled into bed, still wearing her scrubs from her shift and very easily fell back asleep. She wasn't even aware of the kiss that Joel had placed on her temple or the way that he quietly whispered he loved her before he left to go get Tommy.
She couldn't tell if she was woken up by the transformers blowing outside, the sound of helicopters and gunfire, or her phone buzzing incessantly. She crawled from bed and peeked into Sarah's room to find that she was still sleeping; with all of this noise it was hard to tell how. She rushed downstairs and searched the house for Joel who was nowhere to be found. She finally had the conscious to look at her phone, a breath of relief falling off her lips once she saw Joel's name.
"Joel? What's going on, is everything okay?" She asked, her hands starting to shake slightly. The noises around her were slowly starting to blur into white.
"Get Sarah, hide and lock all the fuckin doors. Now. We're comin to you. Grab my gun and sit still til we get you." Joel said.
"Joel-"
"Just fuckin do it, Celeste!"
Ringing picked up in her ears and she felt like she couldn't move until she heard barking outside. She walked towards the living room and her heart dropped when she saw the front door wide open.
"Sarah?" Celeste felt like throwing up, nothing in her gut felt right and she knew that something was off. She stepped outside and looked around, a helicopter flying overhead.
"Mrs. Adler?" Her head snapped at the sound of Sarah's voice coming from next door. She made her way next door and quietly went inside, walking on her tiptoes. She couldn't explain it, but nothing was right.
She could see the blood on the floor before Sarah slipped in it. She tried to keep the sound of her breathing minimal as she approached Sarah from behind and grabbed her wrist. Sarah jumped but luckily didn't vocalize that she had been startled. Celeste brought her finger to her lips signalling to be quiet, but they had already made too much noise.
They froze and turned to face the sight in the kitchen which was straight out of a horror movie. Nana looked up at them and slowly rose to her feet. If it came down to it, Celeste would knock the old lady out to protect Sarah, but neither were aware it'd take more than that to take her down. She was just an old lady, right? The poor thing couldn't even eat on her own, what's the worst she could do. Well, they were looking at the worst she could do. Mr. Adler and Mrs. Adler both sprawled out on the ground surrounded in blood seemed good enough to be categorized in "worst", but again... she was an old lady, no way she did all of this on her own. Nana let out an inhuman screech and started charging at the pair. Celeste yanked Sarah back and shoved her towards the door.
"Go, now!" The two ran out of the house, refusing to look back. Both of them stopped at the sight of headlights and Tommy's truck pulling up directly in front of them, the tires screeching to a stop.
"Get in the truck! Right now! Move." Joel got out as soon as the truck had stopped moving a heavy wrench in his hand. He pushed Sarah and Celeste towards the truck but everybody froze at the sound of Nana coming. She fell off the steps and right onto the ground and everyone thought for a moment that it was done and over with until she shot back up like nothing happened and began sprinting full speed at Joel and his family. He had no choice but to swing the wrench at the old lady. Celeste wrapped her arms around Sarah's shoulders, surely that must've been hard to watch for a girl her age.
Joel rushed to Sarah who was seemingly in shock, "You killed her."
"Baby, I'm sorry." He cupped her cheeks and then pulled her into a hug. "Baby, listen to me. It's not just the Adler's, but we're gonna be brave-"
Another transformer blue, cascading green light across their faces. Sarah and Celeste climbed into the backseat, Celeste wrapping her arm around Sarah. She did her best to shield her eyes as Tommy hit the Adlers who she was sure were dead. They were running at the truck as if nothing had happened.
Transformers were blowing left and right and Celeste couldn't focus on one thing in front of her. Joel was probably yelling at her for letting Sarah out of the house and she couldn't even process it. She hated herself for letting Sarah get into that position at the Adlers, she should've paid more attention.
"Baby," she heard Joel's voice and she snapped her head at him.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." She attempted to say but it came out as a whisper.
"We're gonna be fine." She noticed then that his hand was reaching into the backseat to hold hers. She didn't remember him doing that or how long he'd been doing it, but it brought her comfort to know he was there for them.
"How do you know?" Sarah asked, her voice wavering. "How do you know we're not sick?"
"Tommy, let me out." Celeste said suddenly. "I-I-I work in the ER, I've probably been exposed to whatever this is, let me out. I can't get you sick, I won't."
"No, fuck no." Joel snapped. "You're not gettin out of this truck, damnit."
Celeste put her hand over her face, taking a deep breath to prevent herself from bursting into tears. Her anxiety hadn't been a problem in years, and it felt like all of it was rushing in on her at once. She didn't want to show signs of panic for Sarah.
"The Adlers would take Nana into the city. To the hospital for stuff." Sarah said.
"You're right. They would. That's probably why. But Celeste isn't sick. If she was going to get sick she would be by now. And she's not."
"Fuck." Celeste said under her breath. She couldn't help but think of Belle and Jenny, who both called her earlier begging her to come back into work. They were probably suffering there right now, overrun with this sickness, or they were probably dead. The ER staff was already a small team, who knew how they were holding up under the magnitude of this. Would it even have helped if Celeste went back in? Or would she just be another dead body? If it was like this on the outskirts she couldn't imagine what it was like in the city.
Celeste was ripped from her thoughts by Tommy and Joel arguing in the front street about where to go. Her vision focused on her surroundings which was a town street full of people running around with no sense of direction. She felt sick seeing some of them covered in blood, screaming and crying with no clue on what to do.
Tommy put the truck in reverse as they continued discussing different ways off of this street. They didn't care how, they just needed off. Sarah clutched her hand so tight it might've cut off the circulation.
"Celeste." Sarah said and she turned her head to what Sarah was looking at. "Dad?"
"Tommy, forward. Now." Celeste could feel her heart beating in her ears at the sight of the plane falling out of the sky. She held onto Sarah as the plane collided with ground sending a large explosion into the sky and down the street. Everything was black after that.
There was ringing in Celeste's ears as she came to. She could easily tell the truck had flipped by the way that she was sprawled across the ceiling of it. She jumped at the feeling of Joel's hands on her cheeks.
"You're okay. You're okay." He said pulling you by your arms to sit up to which she resisted the urge to scream in pain. She looked around noticing Sarah was standing outside the truck, barely holding her balance on one foot. With one glance she could tell she had either severely sprained it, or fractured it.
"My shoulder. It's dislocated, I can tell." She said as Joel pulled her from the truck. Eventually when all was settled she'd have to coach Joel into popping it back into place to which she'd have to fight him to agree on.
"I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry." Joel pulled her into his body, hugging her tightly. This nightmare never seemed to end.
"Sarah, are you okay?" Celeste asked, putting her hands on her shoulders.
"It's my ankle."
"I'll take a look when we get somewhere safe, okay?" Celeste asked and pulled Sarah in for a hug as a sheriff car slammed into the truck they had all just been in.
"Head to the river! I'll find another way." Tommy yelled from the other side.
"You'll have to carry her." Celeste told Joel and he scooped her up into her arms.
"You keep your eyes on me, alright? Don't look anywhere else." Joel said and then turned to her. "Baby?"
"Yeah?" She replied.
"We're making it out of this." He told her and she nodded. "Say it. We're making it out of this."
"We're making it out of this." She repeated, though she wasn't sure how much she actually had meant it.
They took of running down the alley, the heat of the flames coming from everywhere making their skin wet with sweat. Celeste stayed close to Joel, following right behind him. They stopped when they came across multiple bodies down one alleyway being gnawed on by multiple infected people. This wasn't real. This couldn't be real. This was out of horror movies she watched as a kid, this shouldn't be real life.
Joel looked around and searched for another way when one of the infected realized they were there and shot up from the ground. He took off running and Celeste could see it was toward the door of a building. She ran in front of him to open it so he could get through with Sarah and then followed behind him, the footsteps of the infected growing closer.
They ran through an empty diner, the sounds of what was following them hot on their tails. Celeste could tell by Sarah's face that it was getting closer and closer but she refused to look back. That was the first rule in every horror movie. They ran through the kitchen and out the back door, ignoring the sounds of everything crashing behind them.
"Celeste!" Sarah screamed and she had the instinct to brace for impact, to prepare herself to fight this thing off of her but it never came. A gunshot rang through the air and they stopped dead in their tracks and turned to see the infected laying on the ground.
"It's okay, baby. We're safe." He said to Sarah.
Celeste wrapped her arm around Joel when a light was shined in their faces.
"Don't move." The soldier said.
"Our daughter's hurt. Her ankle." Joel said moving towards him. She almost didn't have time to process that he said "our".
"Stop right there!" He yelled.
"Easy now. We're not sick." Joel pleaded. Celeste stepped in front of him to which he wanted to object.
"I got two civilians by the river, one of em injured... Ankle."
Joel took another step towards him to which he pointed his gun at them. Celeste held her hands up in surrender.
"She's a kid, sir, please." She said.
"Hey! No one told you to move." The soldier said.
"Yes sir." Joel replied.
He lowered his gun for a moment and relief washed over Celeste. After this chaotic night, the military would take them somewhere safe until this all blew over. Sarah's ankle would be fine, her shoulder would be taken care of, and everything would be back to normal in a month or two.
Then the light hit their eyes again.
'We're not sick." Joel said shaking his head.
"Hey, put it down." Celeste said, taking a step back.
"Sir." Joel pleaded. "We are not sick!"
Joel dove for safety, Sarah rolling out of his arms and Celeste tumbled down the hill right next to them. With the adrenaline, Celeste couldn't even tell there was a bullet lodged in her arm, it took the feeling of blood trickling down her forearm for her to realize anything was wrong.
"Joel," She pushed herself off the ground and looked to Joel who had a gun pointed in his face. She thought for sure that this was it. This was how they die. All three of them, this far surviving everything the universe threw at them, just to die at the hands of the people who were supposed to protect them.
"Please don't." Joel whispered. Before he could pull the trigger, Tommy was behind him and put a bullet through his skull. For once, Celeste was thankful for murder.
She turned her head and noticed Sarah on the ground. "No," She said quietly. She crawled to her, immediately feeling like she was going to throw up at the sight. "I can fix this."
Celeste had seen plenty of gunshot wounds in the ER, this was Texas for Christ's sake. She knew how to remove bullets, and stitch them clean enough to leave minimal scarring. She had never lost a patient to a gunshot wound.
"Sarah?" Celeste looked down at her, doing her best to examine the wound in the low lighting. Celeste couldn't help but feel like throwing up because after getting a good look she knew there was no way she could fix this. She looked up at Tommy who had been a combat veteran. He knew as well as she did that Sarah was not going to survive this.
Joel was next to his daughter in a matter of seconds as her breathing picked up uncontrollably. "Move your hand, baby. Move your hand. Help me, Cel, help me."
She almost felt like she couldn't move, and she shook away all of the negative thoughts from her head. "I can fix it. Tommy, give me your flannel, I can stop-"
"Celeste-" Tommy said softly.
"Just fucking give it to me, Tommy!" Celeste yelled. He obliged and pulled his flannel off and tossed it to her.
"Sarah, you're gonna be fine, okay. I'm gonna fix this. I can- I can fix it." Celeste pressed the flannel into her wound to which she winced and let out a cry. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry."
"I know it hurts, I know. I know. I know. I'm sorry." Joel went on as Sarah grabbed at him, panic coursing through her eyes.
"I can-" Celeste stopped when she finally saw the life fleeing Sarah's eyes. "Joel."
Joel held her body to his chest, rocking her back and forth until her final breath.
Celeste stood up and walked away from them, bending over to throw up whatever was left in her stomach. Sarah was gone. The world was gone. How were they to go on after this? The people they thought they could trust put a bullet in her arm and ended Sarah's life.
A kid.
She was just a kid.
She had a life ahead of her.
And Celeste couldn't save her.
It probably would eat at her for the rest of whatever life she'd live after this.
"You're hit." Tommy said to her. He handed her the flannel she had used to try and stop Sarah's bleeding. "Here."
He tied it around her arm and she winced in pain, the adrenaline quickly wearing off. Of course it had to be the arm with the dislocated shoulder.
"Cel," She turned at the sound of Joel's voice.
"I'm sorry, Joel." Celeste said to him, immediately breaking down into tears. Joel pulled her into a tight hug, tears streaming down his face. He held her as she sobbed uncontrollably. "I'm sorry."
"We need to move. Find somewhere safe for the night." Tommy said after the sound of an infected echoed around them.
Celeste felt empty as she watched Joel scoop up Sarah's body. She had one job in this world and it was to save those injured or sick. Everyone around them was sick and the one person who depended on her most died in her father's arms.
It was unlikely Celeste or Joel would recover from the trauma of Outbreak Day. Celeste would never forgive herself for failing to fix what was already unfixable. The power of the moon and the stars couldn't heal the hurt from either of them.
a/n: this was gonna have an alternate ending where joel basically is filled with rage at the fact that sarah died (as he should be) and then told celeste to leave them and then they'd be split up until 20 years later but i didnt and idk if ill even write another one but we'll see. good night
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moririki · 4 years ago
Text
⤷ SAFETY NET
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FATGUM & HAWKS X READER -> 1.1K
when partnered with another pro hero, expect them to look out for you and have your back when in danger )
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REQUEST -> n/a
CONTAINS -> pro hero reader, reader falling off a building but not like that, reader thinking they might die for like two seconds in hawks' but they do NOT, fanon hawks(?) kind of im sorry, lazy plot
MORI'S THOUGHTS -> idk remember that tiktok trend around january where someone pretends to fall off a building and then make a swift getaway???? yeah it's just that basically
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❍ FATGUM
-> "hey, get back here!" you ignored the angry voice, sprinting harder as you made your way to the roof of the building while cursing under your breath
-> when you clocked into work this morning, you didn't expect to be infiltrating a villain's headquarters in order to steal some documents to be on the agenda
-> neither did your partner fatgum
-> you shared an incredulous look before being given directions and a debrief
-> since fatgum was a rescue hero, there was an agreement for him to linger behind as backup while you went inside
-> though your quirk was nowhere near suited to this mission, you were still the better option to do so
-> you spoke into your earpiece quickly as you threw open the door to the roof, getting hit with the fierce wind
-> "you better fucking catch me, toyomitsu," you muttered to yourself, clutching the documents to your chest
-> you ran to the edge of the building, sucking in a deep breath as you saw how high up you were
-> but if you were to squint, you could make out the faint yellow blob that was your partner
-> "i'm right here, y/n," he chirped through the earpiece. "well, i'm a few stories down"
-> despite the adrenaline coursing through you, you giggled a little. you were about to respond when the door to the roof banged open again behind you
-> you turned to see several men, with guns, run out and surround you
-> well, it was now or never
-> "you've got nowhere to run, hero," the ringleader snarled
-> you tried to sound confident, racking your brain for any witty one-liner
-> "maybe not run, but..." you trailed off, raising your hand in a mock salute before steeling your nerves and taking a step back off of the ledge
-> you would have laughed at the way the ringleader's eyes looked like they would boggle out of his head, but the horrifying feeling of freefalling invaded your senses
-> maintaining your death grip on the documents you had risked your life to get, you shut your eyes and curled in on yourself as you braced yourself for any impact
-> sure, fatgum said he was here, but the wind rushing through your hair and the way the roof got further and further away wasn't instilling much confidence in you
-> but after those worst moments of your life, you felt your body hit something soft
-> it happened fast, but one moment you were gaining momentum, and the next you were safely engulfed in the familiar warmth of fatgum
-> his arms were wrapped around you, and you sucked in a breath that you didn't realise that you were holding in
-> you didn't move, just letting your heartbeat return to normal and for your senses to come back
-> you vaguely became aware of the way toyomitsu was patting your head in some attempt to comfort you, and you clung to him gladly
-> "right now, you're probably my favourite person in the entire world." you finally let out a breathless laugh, and you heard the comforting rumble of fatgum's in return
-> "well, i'd be a terrible partner if i didn't catch you. i guess i'd feel bad, too." you giggled as he finally set you down on your own feet, though he still stayed close
-> "now, how about we go get something to eat?" he suggested
-> "you read my mind," you beamed at him
❍ HAWKS
-> when you, two young aspiring heroes, had initially been assigned to work as partners there was a great protest
-> both you and the winged hero were adamant about working best on your own, but it was out of your hands
-> so for the past few months, you adapted to having a partner during your hero work
-> the amount of squabbles that the two of you had over which one of you was the sidekick was exhausting
-> with your quirk being accustomed to land and his to air, it was a bit of a mystery as to how you were supposed to work together
-> but you made it work
-> both of you were extremely capable as heroes, and quickly adapted to each others' quirks
-> there was a reason for you both being placed in the top ten, after all
-> but when hawks wasn't taking down villains, he gave no indication of being ranked 2nd in the country
-> "aw, c'mon, y/n, don't tell me you aren't hungry," he complained
-> "keigo, we aren't going to the fried chicken place"
-> the man almost pouted
-> "why not?"
-> "the last time we went there i had to sit and watch you eat them until you were sucking on the bone. i'd rather not have to see that again, ever"
-> hawks opened his mouth, probably to sulk, when you both heard a some screams from around the corner
-> exchanging a quick look, both of you prepared wordlessly and started to approach the scene
-> from what you could see, there was a villain stood outside of a jewellery store, with several civilians scrambling for cover
-> you couldn't see any major damage, but your eyes widened as you saw how one man in a suit was suddenly launched high into the air by the villain
-> "looks like i'll handle that," hawks muttered, quickly taking flight and catching up to the guy
-> you sprang into action too, helping to evacuate the area while the villain's attention was diverted by your partner's flashy wings
-> you had just ushered a woman to safety when you felt the ground slip away from beneath you and start to shrink as you were flung away at an alarming speed
-> well, fuck, you thought. i guess this is it.
-> as you reached the apex of your trajectory, you felt your stomach drop as you began to return back to earth
-> you felt a bit pathetic as you pictured the headlines- "number three hero dies from being thrown too hard, did nothing to prevent fall"
-> but when the slam of concrete never greeted your body, and an arm wrapped around your waist and jerked you swiftly upwards again, you were reminded just why you had been stuck with a partner
-> "geez, was a bank robber too much to handle for the number 3 hero?" you heard hawks' smartass comment, and you glared at him in return
-> "you really left it until the last second, huh?" you poked his shoulder in annoyance, and felt him laugh as he readjusted his grip
-> "maybe if you agree to go to the chicken place after arresting this guy i won't drop you"
-> "deal"
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