#sorry if this looks a little messy i didn't want to spend 3 days on it like i did with the other two digital noisecouple drawings i did

[gottabeveggietales]

"i just died in your arms tonight..."

[hannieehaee]

18+ / mdi

content: loser!jungkook, sub!jungkook, softdom!reader, oral (m receiving), etc.

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, extra

wc: 1632

a/n: i havent read the previous three parts in months so if theres any discrepancies pls forgive</3

masterlist

in the time you'd known jungkook, you'd never actually been to his apartment.

he was at university on a scholarship, meaning that he didn't have to worry about paying for schooling or dorming. any money he earned from tutoring or any allowance received by his parents was all his to keep, meaning that his current residence was nicer than that of the average student.

despite being aware of all of this, you were still quite shocked the first time he brought you around.

unlike what you'd expected, jungkook's spacious studio apartment was not filled with nerdy figurines and stacks of comic books (god, that would've been adorable). instead, it replicated the appearance of the average bachelor pad. the furniture appeared of good quality, the bed was comfy, the decor clean, and even the cleanliness gave you a vibe of maturity and put-togetherness that you hadn't quite gotten from jungkook yet. at least not to this extent.

the most shocking thing, though? that was jungkook himself; his look and demeanor while lounging around his apartment.

he'd been growing his hair recently, something which you adored, though tonight had been the first time you'd ever seen him with it without the proper care you assumed went to it every morning. the messy curls laid at the sides, fluffy after a whole day of being worn and played with by the wind. accompanied by that, he donned some loose sweats and a simple tank top, two garments you'd never once seen on the boy. he tended to go for less casual outfits while in public, usually wearing buttoned up flannels or graphic tees.

unfortunately for you, his slight change in look had an instant effect on you. had anyone else seen him like this, you were sure they'd pursue him immediately. as of late, more and more girls were taking notice of him. since meeting you, his confidence had gone up and his way of presenting himself had evolved quite a bit. just a few more months and you were sure he'd become a heartthrob by all definition of the word.

"god, you're gorgeous," you practically whimpered as soon as he let you in, having taken a few moments to simply stare at him before pecking his lips as a greeting.

"oh, i- thanks. you're prettier," he mumbled back as he welcomed you in, "sorry it's a little messy."

he must've been kidding. the place was insanely tidy! you expected as much from jungkook, but it was still surprising to find a college-aged boy with cleanliness.

"it's perfect, baby. show me to your room?", you went straight into business.

with a sheepish smile, he led you to his room.

you had previously agreed that you'd be spending the night tonight. it was your first sleepover at his place, which had you both giddy at the thought. there was no special reason for it other than your sudden insistence for it about a week ago, claiming you wanted to see where a one jeon jungkook spent his nights away from you.

he was shy about it at first, as per usual, but agreed after a few smiles and kisses from you.

and so now you had the privilege of laying on his bed on a saturday night, clad in a pair of his boxers and an oversized shirt of his as you waited for him to do his skincare.

you had insisted on not packing an overnight bag, knowing jungkook would have anything you needed at his place — he was very well put together, after all.

smiling at him as soon as he entered the room, you extended your arms to motion him over to the bed, causing him to chuckle shyly as he stepped towards you. once he was at a close enough distance, you grabbed at his arms, pulling him to the bed and somehow managing to get him to lay down, climbing on him immediately after.

"hey, there, gorgeous," you flirted, hands on his shoulders and full weight sitting on his crotch area. it wouldn't take long until you found a tent under you.

"you don't have to try and fluster me every time you see me anymore, you know ..." he mumbled as he lost any ounce of control under you.

"where's the fun in that?", you smirked as your hands traced their way under his shirt, pulling it off him without a second thought, "god, how'd you get even more handsome?", you groaned as you took him in, so pretty below you with his long hair and his breathless state.

"i- i just- oh-,"

you gave him no chance to speak, choosing instead to quickly throw off your his own shirt and lower your lips down to his. the kiss was immediately heated. you could never really help yourself around jungkook, but fortunately, he liked that about you.

he'd gotten a bit less shy with time. his hands were more willing to explore your body nowadays, currently finding themselves on your waist as he pulled you closer to him.

you adored how much more comfortable he'd gotten around you, both sexually and not so. at times, he'd even initiate sex with you. these instances were a bit awkward for him, but you always liked to encourage him, letting him know through your enthusiasm how much you enjoyed it when he went after what he wanted.

however, you still had to keep him on his toes somehow.

like now.

"no touching, baby," you murmured between kisses, grabbing onto his hands and pinning them above his head as you leaned down onto him.

with a simple gulp, he nodded, lips shyly smooching so you'd kiss him again.

continuing your kiss, your hands went down to his torso, sneaking under the fabric and beginning to play with the skin there. your fingers traced the ridges of his abs, adoring how he shuddered against you but made no complaint. the silent effect of your actions only lasted up until your hands made their way north, eventually finding his nipples and tracing them teasingly.

the poor boy under you whimpered against your lips. his arms made some movement, but did not stray away from where you'd left them above his head, still pressed together as he attempted to follow your directions and not touch you.

your next move was to rid him of his clothes altogether, requiring to get off him for a few moments but immediately taking your rightful place straddling him on his bed once more.

"prettiest thing i've ever seen," you hummed as you looked down at him, leaning down to press kisses on every inch available.

"please ..." he mumbled when your lips first made contact with his chest, knowing their next destination.

ignoring him, you continued as before, letting your lips find their way to his nipple and twirling your tongue around it in a teasing manner. your barely there touch had him whining at the contact, wanting more from you.

you took pity on him, deciding to go all the way and suckling on the bud just how you knew he liked. except the poor boy could barely handle the pleasurable pain that came from it. he writhed under you as you alternated between pecs, filling his chest with love bites that'd flourish by the next morning.

the kisses made their way down his body, landing at his happy trail by the time you lowered yourself to your knees at the end of the bed. with a bite to your lip, you enjoyed the view of what was to be in your mouth in mere moments.

jungkook sat up, wanting to see what threat of pleasure approached him next. he groaned upon seeing how hungry you looked eyeing his hardness, but he remained a good boy by keeping his hands to his sides rather than reaching for you.

"a-ah, fuck," he groaned as soon as your lips made contact with his member, lightly closing in on his tip and suckling at it in a way that had his breath catching and eyes rolling back.

keeping your eyes on the trembling boy, you caught glimpse of his hands fisting harshly at the sheets, holding himself back from wrapping around your hair as he usually did. the thought made you smile around him. he was so so sweet and well mannered.

deciding to be just as nice, you engulfed as much of him as you could, practically deepthroating him. his reaction was immediate, whining and writhing above you while you had your fun with his cock.

"p-please, oh fuck, please," he pleaded for nothing in particular.

you weren't one to ever deny him of anything. every one of your actions was meant to aid him in his pleasure.

humming against him, you slobbered all over him, not minding the mess of your saliva and his cum slowly dripping down onto your chin as long as the pretty boy above you was losing himself because of you.

as per usual, his orgasm hit him pretty quick. as shy as he was, he was never too timid to let himself cum when he hit his limit. jungkook was one to appreciate the pretty girl giving him pleasure by demonstrating his immense appreciation.

it always got to you how loud he became while cumming, which was currently causing a mess in your panties. you decided to enjoy every drop of his orgasm before paying mind to that, though.

finally done torturing him by licking off any remnants off his dick, you climbed up his body and sat yourself on his lap with a smile, leaning in for a teasing tongue-filled kiss before humming in satisfaction against his breathless lips.

"did i tell you i love how you're growing out your hair?"

he gulped.

"you've, uh, you've mentioned."

[eimids]

Loving you is all I need

Leah Williamson x reader fluff

Leah and reader get stuck in an elevator together while they are fighting.

this is just a quick blurb

warnings: slight angst but also fluff

Words:650

"Hold the door" You yelled as you ran to the elevators. You and Leah had been fighting the previous night so you were a bit late to training. Someone sticks their arm out of the elevator to keep the doors from closing.

"Oh.. hi Lee" You said when you realized who was in the elevator.

"Hi Y/n"She said coldly to you and pressed the button with number six on it.

"are you seriously still mad at me? You never call me by my name it’s always some nickname" You frowned a little.

"I'm not mad. Just disappointed. I thought you wanted to get married with me but guess not" Leah said sounding hurt.

"But I do want to-" You started when the elevator stopped. You fell to the ground from the sudden stop.

"Shit y/n/n, are you okay?" Leah asked clearly worried.

"Yeah I think I am but my ankle hurts a little" You answered. Leah didn't respond but started pushing different buttons to call to someone that the elevator stopped.

"It's not working. Fuck this. Why there would read that if you push that button it would call somewhere when it doesn't fucking work" Leah said panicking a little.

"Leah calm down. Come and sit with me. Soon someone will realize that we didn't show up to training." You said to the blond woman.

She sat down next to you and calmed her breathing. You sat there a while in an awkward silence until you spoke.

"I'm sorry that I said no to your proposal but you never really gave me a chance to explain myself. You just got sad and left" You started.

"Well can you explain now. Whe have been together for 3 years and we have known each other for ten so what's the problem here? Or do you just not love me anymore?" Leah asked shyly.

"Oh Lee nothing like that. I love you so much and you know that. I won't ever leave your side. But it's just.. You remember how messy the divorce was between me and ex. It wasn't good for anyone and my mental health went so low. I just don't want to go through that again" You answered with tears in the corners of her eyes.

"Sweet I would never hurt you. I wouldn't cheat you like she did. I will do anything to protect you and I just want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to have kid's with you and I want to grow old with you. I don't want to spend another day alone. All I want is you my love"

"Okay then ask me " You said quietly.

"Huh?" Leah asked confused.

"Aske me again" You said again and Leah flipped you to sit on her lap. She looked right in your eyes and asked.

"Y/f/n. Will you marry me?" Leah asked smiling.

"Yeah" You answered laughing and crying and then kissed the blonde.

You sat there kissing passionately a while, own bubble. Suddenly the elevator started moving again and you had to snap back to reality.

Soon the doors opened and Leah stood up, then helping you. You then walked to the team room. You were limping and Beth came running to you.

"Oh My God. Are you guys okay?" Beth asked worried, Viv by her side.

"Better than ever." You said smiling. Then you looked at Leah and kissed her.

"Sooo we have some news for you guys" You started.

"Don't say you too are leaving Arsenal" McCabe said quickly.

"What, no! Why would you think that?" Leah asked laughing.

"I just saw a dream about it. Did you guys know th-" Katie started but Buv interrupted her.

"Just tell us the news" Viv said inpatient.

You looked at each other and said.

"We are getting married"

[reivrze]

how enha fell for you </3

a/n : ok so the request wasn't really clear so i just went with "when/how did enha realize they were in love with you". i ended up getting the exact same request as i was writting this so it works out, thank you for requesting and enjoy !

pairing. enhypen x reader genre. floof warning. none

l. heeseung . ⁺

you and heeseung would have gone on a little late-night outing at the basketball court not far from your house. it was made clear quite quickly that your skills were far from impressive. as you kept missing shots, stumbling on your own feet and fumbling passes, heeseung was laughing his ass off y'all know when he laughs really hard, his laugh echoing through the empty court. feeling so annoyed at your lack of skill, you bent down, hiding your face in your knees. heeseung approached you, trying hard to stop himself from laughing.

'c-c'mon y/n.. you're not..that.. bad?" he couldn't even get through the whole sentence without starting to laugh. he rubbed your back, trying to bring up your spirit as he bent down to your level. you got your face out of your knees as you locked eyes with him, slightly glaring at him. at that moment, you were the cutest thing to heeseung, he knew you weren't good at basketball but your efforts to come to play with him made his heart soften. he didn't exactly know why but his heart felt full then, he didn't want the night to end.

p. jongseong . ⁺

i already did this for jay here

s. jaeyun . ⁺

jaeyun had been sick for the past few days and had been confined in his room and bedridden. him being your best friend, you missed him way too much to not sneak into his bedroom while the rest of the guys were out of the dorm. you had brought him multiple choices of ramyeon and your laptop to watch movies with him. jake had initially protested, not wanting to get you sick but honestly you couldn't care less as you scooched him over and took your place under the covers next to him.

you were well into the movie, stuffing your face with noodles when jake looked over at you, eyes all drowsy as his fever tired him out. you looked perfectly imperfect this sounds backhanded but wait, your hair was all messy, blanket up to your neck, and mouth stuffed with food, despite not looking your most "put together" jake couldn't help the feeling of his heart swelling at the sight

p. sunghoon . ⁺

sunghoon had been invited to a photo shoot for the vogue magazine. feeling a little anxious, he had asked you to come with him, you didn't have any plans so you agreed to come. he looked so good, his hair styled to fit his face perfectly and his makeup making his eyes pop. during the five-minute break, he shared that he felt a little anxious, still not feeling sure about how he was doing.

wanting to cheer him up, when he had gone back in front of the camera, you were ready to cheer compliments at him for the rest of the shoot.

"Wow! Sunghoon is so handsome! I'm going to faint!" sorry y'all idk how to compliment others.

he couldn't hide the little smile making its way to his face. he appreciated you being there so much, you were his little cheerleader. making eye contact with you, his heart swooned as he realized he never wants to have to go through anything without you by his side.

k. sunoo . ⁺

sunoo and you had gone to a park, you hadn't seen each other in a while and had wanted to spend the day together. you had brought a volleyball, those mini cakes with drinks, a game of twister, etc. you had a full afternoon planned ahead of you. as you caught each other on what was going on in your lives, a kid had come up to you, an adorable little girl in a cute pink dress with little pigtails. the little girl approached you and gave you a little flower, the girl explained that her mom was just a few meters away and had allowed her to come over here. she took a seat on your lap as sunoo squealed at her cuteness. seeing you with such a big smile and with the cutest little girl on your lap, he found the whole scene so endearing, his heart beating suddenly fast, seeing you in a new light for the first time.

y. jungwon . ⁺

jungwon and you had been invited to a mutual friend's birthday party. you had gone together as you didn’t live far from each other. as you entered the party, you and jungwon quickly got separated as each other's friends pulled you guys apart to rejoin your friends group. the night had been an amusing experience, laughter and music filling the room. as much fun as each of you was having, jungwon couldn't help but miss you a little, he had been excited to hear you'd be coming to the party too, he was a little bummed to be separated from you all night.

jungwon kept an eye on you all night from afar. his heart tightened when he saw one of your guy friends put his arm around you, whispering something in your ear as you laughed. that should've been him making you laugh. this jealousy was a brand new feeling for him. all he knew was that he didn't want anyone other than him to be close to you. telling his friends he'd be right back, he made his way to where you were standing, not thinking much about it, he grabbed your wrist and pulled you to him, bringing you to where he was previously, wanting to keep not only a closer eye on you but his hand in yours to make sure nobody would try to flirt with you

n. riki . ⁺

you were already at the boy's dorm when niki came back from an errand he was running. he wasn't expecting you to be there but was pleasantly surprised to see your face. he had joined you on the couch where you were playing mario kart against sunghoon and sunoo. niki had found your little concentrated face endearing in a way. the way the space between your eyebrows wrinkled, the way your eyes were slightly squinting and the way your bottom lip was stuck under your teeth. the simple moment was enough for him to get the tender realization that he was hopelessly in love with you.

© miyu 2023 - do not copy, translate, repost or plagiarise my work anywhere !

[lokigodofmyheart]

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader

Words: 4.479.

Summary: Tony and Y/N have a friends with benefit situation. But what happens when someone wants more and the other don't?

Warning/Content: angst, fluff.

MASTERLIST

A/N: This is my first time writting a Tony x Reader. Dividers by @cafekitsune <3

Fury was on her, wanting the reports from last mission. And obviously, the only person who hadn’t finished yet was Stark. Somehow, Fury thought that if someone could make him do it, it would be Y/N. And that’s how she ended up in his lab. 

Tony was sitting in his chair, doing absolutely nothing with a glass of whiskey in his hand. He looked at her with his usual smirk “What’s bring you here, Y/L/N?” 

“Have you finished your report from the last mission, Stark?” She asks, walking closer to his desk. 

He let out a sigh, running a hand through his messy hair “No, not yet. Why?” 

“Fury needs it. And he’s been waiting for it for two days now.” Y/N knew how Tony was and how much he hated to make those reports. In the end, she always ends up finishing for him. 

Tony rolled his eyes, taking a sip from his glass “I'll finish it, but not right now. I'm in the middle of something.” 

“Yeah, I can see it.” She glares at him, before she starts going through the giant amount of paper on his desk.  

Tony stops put his glass down on the desk and looks at her with a small smirk “Are you really here to talk about the reports?” 

“Yes.” She finally found it. 

“And are you sure that's the only reason you're here?” His smirks didn’t flatter. 

Y/N grabs the file in her hands “Yes.” That’s all she said before she turns around without looking at him and left his lab. 

Tony watched as she walked away from him, without any further comment. Obviously, given their situation, he found it a bit weird. 

The next day, Y/N was in her room when she heard a knock on her door. She open it, seeing Tony standing there.  

“Yes?”  

The man leaned against the doorway, with a small smile that he saved just for her when they were alone “I need to go to the mall, buy a few things. Wanna tag along?” 

Her face turn to an apologetic one “Sorry, I’m not feeling very well...” 

“You feel sick?” He asked her and she could noticed the worry in his voice. 

“No, not. Just a small headache, nothing major...but thanks for the invitation anyway.” She gave him a small smile. 

Tony was a bit reluctant to believe her but didn't want to press further “Yeah, ok. Rest well.” 

“Thanks.” She gently closes the door. He stood there for a few seconds, worried, before he walked away. 

The next time something like that happened, it was after movie night with the team. Everyone said good night after the movie ended, leaving just the two of them in the living room. Y/N slowly got up from the couch “I’m going to bed too.” 

Tony quickly got up too, grabbing her arm gently and smirk “Why don't we go to mine?” 

Again, the apologetic expression crossed her face “I’m on my period. Sorry.”  

His smirk dropped slightly as his grip loosened and his hand fall from her arm “Oh...” 

Y/N gave a small apologetic smile “Night, Stark.” 

He nods “Night, Y/L/N.” 

Tony thought it was just a coincidence, but he noticed that she looked like she was avoiding being alone with him. It had been more than a week since they had sex and every time he tried, she just had some short of excuse.  

He waited until she finished her training and cornered her when she was leaving the room. “Y/L/N, we need to talk.” 

Y/N stops and look at him “Sure.” 

He looked around to see if anyone was around and he crossed his arms “Have I done something to you?” 

“No.” She made a confused face as she looked at him. 

He studied her features for a moment, before he spoke again, a little lower “You've been avoiding me lately...” 

“No, I’m not.” 

Stark stepped closer to her “Then explain why you're avoiding spending time with me alone.” 

Y/N gave him a small smile “I’m not. Really.” 

“Then why did you always have some sort of excuse each time I ask you to hang out just the two of us?” 

She looked at his face and could see that he was somewhat hurt by her actions “I told you, I wasn't feeling well one day, and the other one I was in my period.” 

He didn’t really believe her “What about the other time at the lab? You came, got some paper, and were gone in a second. You didn't even try to engage with me.” 

“I was busy with the report you didn’t finish. Fury needed that.” She explains and hoped he would buy it. 

Clearly he didn’t. “Like you care about the reports. I think you're avoiding me.” 

“I’m not, Tony.” She says with a gentle voice. “Why don’t you come to my room later, and we can...talk.” She smirks at the last word. 

“Alright, I'll come...” He said, before walking away back to his room, excited for what he could only assume was going to happen tonight. 

As soon as she noticed he had left, her smirk dropped “Fuck...”  

Y/N didn’t know what to do. Yes, she had been avoiding him. They had this friend with benefits things, and she knew from the start that it was all that was and it couldn’t be more. But she had catch feelings for the billionaire and she didn’t know what to do. 

Later, Y/N was sitting on her bed with her laptop in her lap finishing another report for Fury when she heard a soft knock on her door. 

“Come in!” She says without moving from her spot. 

Tony opened the door and walked in, a smirk on his face “Hey, sweetheart.” 

She smiles looking at him “Hey.” 

He walked to the bed, sitting down next to her, he was wearing just a tank top and sweatpants “So, you wanted to...talk.” 

Y/N chuckles softly, closing her laptop and putting on her nightstand. Tony leaned against the headboard, and pulled her onto his lap “You know, the way you were acting today had me a bit worried for a second. I thought I'd done something to upset you...” 

“You’ve done nothing.” She smiles. 

He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him, his lips next to her ear “Good, I'm glad...” he began peppering light kisses on her neck and began to kiss down her neck, and to her shoulder, his hands slowly running up and down her waist and thighs. She just froze, she didn’t know what do to. Yes, she wanted sex with him, but her heart was screaming at her. 

Tony felt the tension in her body and he pulled away slightly, worried “You okay, sweetie?” 

“Yeah...” She tried to mask it with a smile, but Tony could notice on her voice something was wrong. 

His hands came up to cup her face, keeping her looking at him “You feel a bit tense. Talk to me...” Her smile slightly drops and that worried him even more “Y/N, what's wrong?” 

“I’m sorry...” Her voice was almost a whisper “I don’t think I can do this anymore...” 

“It's okay. We can do this another time.” He says with his hand rubbing her side to comfort her. 

“No, I didn’t mean like that.” 

Tony frowned and looked into her eyes “Then what do you mean?” 

Y/N sighs, before she spoke again “I can’t do this...” she points between them. 

His heart ached a bit at her words “You don't want this anymore?” 

“I'm sorry...” she says, getting off his lap and sitting by his side with her hands in her lap. 

He stayed sitting on the bed, looking at her, trying to hide the sadness that was building inside of him “Why? I thought...I thought things were good between us...” 

Y/N looked at him and she could see the pain on his face “It is...was...I swear it was.” 

“Then...why are you ending this? What changed? What did I do, huh?” he was trying to stay calm, but it was hard. He wanted answers. 

“You did nothing wrong.” She smiles sadly at him. 

“Then why? Do...do you not want me?” He let out a shaky breath, his eyes met hers again. 

“I do. And that’s the problem.” Her voice was low as she spoke. 

That made Stark was more confused now “Why is that a problem? I want you too.” 

“Because I want more.”  

There was silence. He took a few seconds trying to gather his thought before answering her with a frow on his face “But, we agreed from the start that-” 

“I know.” she cuts him “And that's why I'm ending this.” 

Tony et out a frustrated breath, running a hand through his hair “Y/N, I care about you, but that's- I can't give you what you want...” 

“I know.” She says and he could hear the sadness on her voice. He hated knowing that he was hurting her with his words, but he couldn't give her what she wanted.  

After a few minutes of silence, he spoke again “Do you regret us?” 

“No.” she smiles, looking at him, still with a hint of sadness “Never.” 

He reached for her hand, intertwining their fingers “Me neither, sweetheart...” 

Y/N looked down at their hands together “I mean, we still can do the friends part.” 

Stark chuckled sadly, bringing their intertwined hands to his lips “Can friendship really be enough?” 

“It has to be.” She whispers. 

He sighed, hating the way this conversation was going “You know I care a lot about you. I just...I don't do relationships anymore, not after...” 

“I know.” She squeezes his hand slightly “And that’s why I’m not asking for it.” 

“This suck, you know. I'm losing someone I care about, and I hate myself for it.” he ran a hand through his hair frustrated. 

Y/N was feeling her eyes filling up with tears, and she blinks, trying to fight it “Believe me, this is much harder for me.” 

“It's hard for both of us, okay?”he said a bit harshly before immediately regretting it “Fuck...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap.” 

She shakes her head, not wanting to cry in front of him “No, it isn't. You care about me when I...I fell in love.” 

The moment he heard those words, his heart ached even more. He wasn't sure what to say to that... so for a while, he just stayed silent, fiddling with her fingers. His jaw was clenched as he tried to control the emotions coursing through his body...he felt like a terrible person, knowing that he could not return her feelings. “I...I wish I could give you what you want. I really do...” 

“Me too...” 

Tony let out a shaky breath and squeezed the hand of hers that he was still holding. Even though he knew it probably wasn't a good idea, he pulled her a bit closer to him, resting his head on her shoulder “We can still be friends, right?” 

Y/N rest her head on his “Of course.” 

For a while, he let himself just feel the comfort of being close to her. But then he pulled away, reluctantly letting go of her hand and getting up from the bed “I should go...” Y/N just nods, not trusting her voice to answer.  He looked down at her for a moment before leaning down and placing a feather-like kiss on her forehead. Part of him wanted to pull her into his arms and never let her go, but instead, he straightened up and without another word, he walked out of her room. 

“Night, Stark...” She says, holding back her tears, knowing that after he left, they would never be this close again. 

“Goodnight, Y/L/N.” He said without looking back, knowing that the sight of her sad face would tear his heart even more. 

Tony walked down the hallway and into his room, walking straight to the mini fridge and grabbing a bottle of liquor. He sat down on the couch but didn't open the bottle just yet. Instead, he buried his head in his hands and let all his bottled-up emotions flood out of his every pore for what felt like hours. He sat there for hours, trying to get himself under control. But the mere idea that the one person he was closest to in the Tower was no longer his... that he had no right to touch, kiss, or hold... he grabbed the bottle of liquor, taking a long sip, as a single thought echoed in his mind ‘You're a complete idiot, Stark.’ 

Y/N stood in her bed, bringing her knees to her chest and finally letting the tears fload after Tony left until she eventually cried herself to sleep. In just a few minutes, Tony finished the first bottle and opened the second, the words she said earlier echoed in his mind. I fell in love. 

The first week had been rough for both of them. They were avoiding each other, which mean they were avoiding the kitchen, the common room, the training room. While Y/N was more quiet than usual and saying she was suffering from allergies to justify that sometimes her eyes and nose were red, Tony just was in a incredible bad mood all the time. The team watched the whole situation with worry and confusion. Everyone knew there was something wrong with Tony, usually when he was in a bad mood, he would go around the tower, annoying and trying to get a reaction out of everyone. But now, he was practically avoiding any interaction. 

-- 

Tony was in the kitchen, enjoying the silence with a coffee in his hand, when Clint, Thor and Steve entered and stopped in front of him. He let out a tired sigh, knowing that wouldn’t be good “What do you all want?” 

Thor studied his face, before speaking “I know that look.” 

“What look?” 

“That look” Thor points at him “The same one I had when Jane broke up with me.” 

Tony rolled his eyes, annoyed with the direction the conversation was going “I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine.” 

“Yeah, Thor.” Clint started “That would imply that Stark was dating someone.” 

“Yes, thank you for that useless addition, bird brain.” Tony rolled his eyes as he leaned against the counter, taking a sip of his coffee “So, are you all just going to keep staring at me, or you have something to say?” 

Steve spoke this time “What's going on, Tony? And don't say nothing, because we all know that you're not fine.” 

Stark groaned, his shoulders slumping a bit “Just...it's nothing, alright? Can you just leave it be?” 

This time it was Clint who spoke “No, because obviously something is happening. Or had happened.” 

He took a deep breath, trying to control his temper “Can you just drop this? I just...I don't want to talk about her.” 

“Oh, so it is a woman?” Thor ask curious. 

He pinched the bridge of his nose “Damn it, yes, Thor. It was a woman, okay?” 

There was a moment of silence, Thor and Clint sharing a knowing look while Steve just stared at him “Well, what happened?” 

Despite himself, Tony’s voice trembled a bit when he spoke “She...she told me she wanted more. And I couldn't give her what she wanted. So we...we just ended things.” He took a gulp of his coffee to try and hide the turmoil he was still feeling “It's done, alright? It's over, and there's nothing that can be changed. Can we please just drop it?” 

The three of them study him, before Steve spoke in a gentle tone “You love her” It wasn't a question. 

Tony didn't even try to deny it this time. He let out a shaky breath and nodded, his eyes downcast “Yeah. I do.” 

“She loves you, right?” Steve asked “Since you said she wanted more, I thought...” 

He nodded and chuckled bitterly “That's the funny part. She does. But i made it clear from the start that I couldn't give her what she wanted. And we agreed to keep it casual. But...she said she still fell in love with me. 

“Arrangements can be changed.” Thor says. 

“It's not that simple, Thor.” Tony let out a tired sigh “What she wants...a serious relationship, commitment, all of that...I can't give her that.” 

“Why not? What are you so afraid of?” Steve was the one who spoke this time. 

“I'm not...” he starts to deny but stop mid-sentence and let out a frustrated breath “I'm not afraid.” he paused for a moment, looking over at Steve before continuing “I'm...I'm a mess, alright? I have demons that still haunt me, nightmares that don't let me sleep more than a few hours. I can be a dick in general and I...I haven't done the whole "relationship" thing in years. I can't get involved in that again.” 

“Don't you remember the last time he dated Pepper?” Clint says to Steve “He looked like hell after they broke up.” 

Tony rolls his eyes “Thanks a lot, bird brain, for remind me about one of the most painful times of my life.” 

Thor nods, agreeing “Yeah, you were just a little worse than you are now. The only thing that took you out of the misery was Y/N moving here and you becoming friends.” Steve and Clint looked at Thor. 

Tony groaned, realizing Thor was absolutely right. He never said it out loud, but deep down, he knew that the only reason he hadn't completely lost his brain after the whole Pepper situation, was Y/N. Having her around, being her friend, helped a lot during those dark months. He rubbed his eyes, suddenly feeling the exhaustion again “What's the point of this conversation, guys? Even if I wanted too, it's too late now. She ended things because I didn't want to give her more than what we had.” 

“The question here is simple: Do you wanna give her what she wants?” Barton asked him. 

Stark looks at him for a moment, before answering slowly and honestly “Yes...I do.” 

Steve puts a hand on his shoulder “Then talk to her. I'm sure she'll listen.” 

He chuckled bitterly “It's funny that you think it's that simple. We ended things weeks ago and we've been avoiding each other ever since. You really think she'll want to talk to me now?” 

“If you’re talking about who I think you’re talking...she’ll listen.” Clint says. Obviously, after Thor made that comment, Barton and Rogers realized who he was talking about. 

And if everything couldn’t get worse, Y/N walked into the kitchen to get some water just in that moment, but she stops seeing Tony and the guys. She knew if she turned back, it would be suspicious, so she walked to the fridge to get her water “Hi...” 

Tony’s body tenses as soon as he saw her, his heart starting to pound hard on his chest. He quickly stands up from where he was resting his back against the counter, his eyes fixed on her. “Hey...”  

The three other Avengers made some lame excuses and left them alone. Tony stayed in his spot against the counter, watching the other members of the team leave the kitchen. Silence fell between them as they both stood a few feet apart from each other. 

“So... how’s it going?” Y/N spoke quietly, trying to make some small talk. 

“Like crap...” Tony didn't want to lie or pretend to be fine, and he knew she wouldn't believe it anyway. So he decided to go for honesty “How about you?” 

“Same.” 

He didn't like the tiredness in her voice, and he hated that he was responsible for it “You're not sleeping well either, right?” Y/N just answers with a head shake. He sighs softly, his heart clenching at the thought that she was suffering with the situation between them as much as he was “Same here...” 

“What a duo, huh?” She gave him a sad smile. 

Despite the situation, he chuckled softly “Yeah...” there was a moment of silence between them before he spoke again “You're avoiding me...” 

“I am...I needed a bit of space.” There was a minute of silence before she spoke again “You're avoiding me too...” 

He looked down for a few seconds, ashamed with himself “I...yeah, I know. I just...I didn't know if you wanted to see me...or if you would want to talk to me...” 

“Tony...” she walks closer to him, putting her water aside “I'm not mad at you or anything. I was sincere when I said we could still be friend.” 

As she walked closer to him, he looked at her face carefully, noticing the dark circles under her eyes. He clenched his jaw tightly as a wave of guilt washed over him. “You're not sleeping.” it wasn't a question, it was more a statement of his realization. 

Y/N rolls her eyes “Have you heard a word I said?” 

Despite everything, one thing he had missed the most was her eye-rolling, and he felt a tiny sense of relief as she did it now “I heard you. I also notice that you're looking like a zombie. You should be sleeping.” 

“You should be too. And not drinking.” 

He chuckled bitterly “Yeah, well. I sleep better after I drink. It helps with the nightmares.” 

“...they came back?” Y/N’s face softens, she knew about his nightmares. 

“Yes, a couple days after...we ended things.” He looked down, avoiding saying the word 'break up' because he still didn't want to believe that's what really had happened. 

“Are you okay?”  

Tony lifts his head, his eyes meeting hers. As much as he wanted to lie and say that he was fine, he wasn't able to do it “No, I'm not...truth is, I haven't been okay at all since you end things with me. I'm...I'm a mess, really. I drink every night, I can't sleep more than a few hours each night, and...and I miss you. I miss you so damn much.” He paused for a moment, closing his eyes and trying to control the emotions he was feeling and the words he was saying, but he continued “I know I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't be telling you all of this. I have no right...but I do miss you. I miss our nights together, our movie nights...and most of all, I miss talking to you, having you by my side...and I can't lie and say I don't miss being with you...” he laughed bitterly “Hell, I miss us...I should have never let you go...I should have...I should have said yes. I should have said yes to everything you wanted. But I was scared...” 

“Scared of what...?” She asks without looking away from him. 

“Scared of committing, scared of being in a relationship again, being trapped...terrified of ending up like I did after Pepper broke up with me...” He let out a strangled breath “I was so goddamn terrified of losing myself again, of having my heart broken again, that I ended up pushing the only person who was willing to be with me, away. And what the hell was the point since I end up breaking my own heart anyway...” 

“You said 'was'...” she spoke quietly. 

Tony looked at her again, his eyes going wide in realization of what he said. “Yes...”his voice was barely above a whisper, but he didn't look away from her “I said 'was'...” He could see the look on her face becoming almost a hopeful one. “I was terrified...” he repeated, as he moved so he was standing right in front of her. He hesitantly reached out his hands to touch hers and she did not pull back.  

A tiny sigh of relief escaped his lips as she let him touch her, her hands so much smaller than his. He gently laced their fingers together, rubbing his thumb on the back of her hands and Tony took a deep breath before continuing “I know what I want...and I want you. I want us...everything. I wanna take you out on dates, I wanna sleep with you and see you pretty face when I wake up. I want to watch silly movies with you, and laugh at your silly comments. I wanna be with you when you're not feeling well...I want everything. Hell, I want to marry you, I want a family...I want a future and I can't see one without you on it.” he paused for a moment, but continued in a soft whisper “And the most important thing...I want to make you happy. I want to make you smile and laugh every single day. I want to give you everything I have, everything I am...hell, I want to give you the goddamn moon if that's what you want. But most of all...I want to give you my heart...because you're the only one I trust with it...” 

Y/N didn’t answer, she just cupped his face in her hands and kissed him. The moment her lips brushed against his, he groaned loudly before cupping her face with his hands and pulling her even closer, the kiss becoming more and more urgent and frantic as he let out all the pent-up feelings and emotions through it. She parted the kiss, but didn't pull back “Are you sure?” 

Tony rested his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed and his breathing becoming more ragged as he tried to regain control over himself. He opened his eyes and looked at her face, one of his hands moving to brush against her cheeks “Never been more sure of anything in my life, sweetheart.” 

He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead before continuing “Y/N Y/L/N...will you be my girlfriend?”  

Y/N smile and nods “Yes.” He let out another breath of relief, a huge wave of happiness washing over his entire body.  

They stayed in that position for a few seconds before he leaned in to kiss her again, this time the kiss was gentle and unrushed. “God, I missed you so much...” 

“I missed you too...” 

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight embrace, her face resting on his chest and his face buried in her hair. He took a deep breath, relishing in the feeling of having her in his arms once again, and the realization that it wouldn't just be a fling. It was real, it was more than physical desire. He cared for her, he loved her, and she was his “I love you.” 

Y/N smiles “Say it again...” 

Tony smiles at her request “I love you.” he says, gently pulling her face away from his chest so he could look directly in her eyes “I'm in love with you...And I plan on saying it every damn day for the rest of our lives.” 

[allieslittlewritings]

*not my gif <3

Care

Summary: Spencer takes care of his daughter when she's depressed and can't do it herself

Warnings: Depression, self-deprecation, bad writing, swearing, reader struggles to take care of herself

Word Count: ~ 1.4k

Spencer's apartment was dark when he entered.

Quiet, too.

He flicked a light on and looked around.

Not a single thing was different than when he'd left 3 days ago.

The book he left on the couch was in the exact same place, his mug still stood on the coffee table.

He called your name into the apartment, not getting an answer.

He quickly dropped his satchel by his coat stand and went to your room.

The door was open, your room was just as dark as the rest of the apartment.

He saw you lying in bed and whispered your name.

When you didn't answer he got even more worried.

He stepped into your room, only now noticing how messy it had seemingly gotten.

Sitting down on the edge of your bed he reached over to your nightstand and turned your lamp on.

Your eyes blinked open and struggled to not close again because of the light.

You looked up at your dad and tiredly blinked.

"Hi," He said.

He had that specific tone of voice he used when he was worried about you, you could tell.

"What are you doing home? You said you wouldn't be back until Sunday."

Spencer's worry increased at that, "It is Sunday, sweetheart."

Your eyes widened, "What? No, it can't be."

"How long have you been in bed?" He knew it was difficult for you to get out of bed sometimes, but your depression hadn't been this bad in a long time.

You looked around your room, your brain was slow and tired.

It couldn't be Sunday.

You had an essay and homework to finish how were you going to get everything done if it was Sunday night already?

Spencer noticed your breathing getting more erratic.

"Hey, hey, hey, look at me, it's okay. You're okay. What is it you need help with?"

Tears of exhaustion and overwhelm formed in your eyes.

"I don't need help, I just have to stop being so fucking lazy." Your words came out harshly.

"You are not lazy," Spencer said. "You have lower energy levels because you're depressed and you haven't eaten in the last few days, not because you don't want to spend your energy on things."

You looked around at your messy room.

"I'll help you clean your room," You dad said, seeing what you were looking at. "But let's focus on you first. Do you think you feel okay enough to take a shower?"

You took a second to think before shaking your head.

Spencer nodded in understanding.

"That's okay." He thought for a second before standing up, "I'll be right back, okay?"

He exited your room and a few tears escaped your eyes.

"He just got back from a long case, he doesn't want to take care of you like you're a helpless child."

"His job is difficult enough, he doesn't deserve to come home and have more shit to do."

Spencer came back into your room about 3 minutes later, a pack of wet wipes in one hand and a cup with your toothbrush in it in the other.

He sat back down on your bed and moved your hair so it wasn't in your face anymore.

Your hair was dirty.

Spencer knew pointing that out wouldn't be helpful right now, it's not like you weren't aware.

With your hair tucked behind your ears and out of your face, Spencer removed a wipe from the bag and carefully started cleaning your face.

The hand he held under your chin was cold.

But the gentle way he treated you felt warm and healing.

He threw the wipe away in your little dustbin and then put toothpaste on your toothbrush for you.

He handed it to you and waited for you to take it.

You slowly brushed your teeth, using the cup he brought to spit the toothpaste out.

"I'm sorry." You whispered when you were done and he took your toothbrush from you.

"For what, sweetheart?" He placed the cup on your bedstand and your toothbrush on top of it.

"You just got back, you must be tired and I'm making you take care of me because I'm too pathetic to do it myself."

Self-deprecation was common in depressed people, Spencer knew that.

But it never hurt less to hear you insult yourself, to be reminded that you didn't see yourself the way he saw you.

"I'm not tired." He assured you.

He wasn't lying. Seeing your child depressed and exhausted wakes you up more than any slap in the face or ice cold water ever could.

"It's not your fault you can't take good care of yourself right now. And you're not making me do anything. I want to take care of you. I'm your dad, that's what I'm here for." He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

"I'm gonna get you some clean clothes, okay?"

You nodded and just sat there as he walked to your closet.

A lot of your clothes were contributing to the mess on your floor but Spencer grabbed the most comfortable looking clothes he could find.

A hoodie and sweatpants and some fuzzy socks.

He also quickly snatched a hair tie from your desk.

Spencer placed the clothes on your bed in front of you. "Can you turn around for a second so I can tie your hair back, please?"

You did as he asked and he quickly tied your hair.

He ignored the urge to untangle your hair, you needed to eat first.

"I'm gonna go make you something to eat while you get dressed, you can take as much time as you need."

Your dad left your room, closing the door behind him.

Slowly and begrudgingly, you got up and managed to change into the clean clothes your dad picked out.

You took the cup from your bedstand and left your room, going to the bathroom to put your toothbrush back and use the toilet.

After finishing your things in the bathroom, you went to find your dad.

You found him in the kitchen, washing grapes.

"Okay, so I technically lied. I ordered pizza, I didn't make you something, I'm sorry."

Spencer felt bad when he realized he hadn't gone grocery shopping in a while.

But he figured there was also a higher likelihood that you'd actually want to eat pizza, rather than something he made.

"It's okay," You said quietly, moving to sit on the kitchen counter.

Spencer placed a bowl of grapes next to you and ate a few himself.

"Thank you," You said, picking up a grape and eating it.

Spencer smiled softly, happy to see you eat. "You're welcome, sweetheart."

The pizza got there shortly after.

You and Spencer sat on the couch and watchsd your favorite show, which Spencer put on.

You ate your pizza and watched your show, and drank a glass of water Spencer got you.

After you both finished eating, Spencer started helping you with your school things.

To your surprise, you actually got it done.

In retrospect it wasn't that much work, any bit of work sounded like a lot to you before.

Your eyes started to get droopy and it was getting late.

"You should get some rest, sweetheart."

You nodded in agreement.

"Do you want to sleep in my bed, just for tonight?"

He knew you probably hadn't gotten much actually restful sleep in the last few days.

And maybe it would be easier for you to sleep in a slightly different environment.

"Only if it won't bother you," You said, a sense of guilt washing over you.

"It won't." Spencer insisted gently.

"Okay."

Spencer went to put your plates in the kitchen and you went to his room.

You climbed into his bed and lay down.

You lay on the same side you always did when you were little and used to crawl into his bed when you had a nightmare, or just really missed him.

Spencer went to get ready for bed and then got into his bed next to you.

You were nearly asleep by then.

You moved closer to him and rested your hand and your head on his chest.

He protectively kept an arm around you as he read a few chapters of the latest book he was reading.

Your rhythmic and soft breathing let him know you were asleep and he quietly breathed a sigh of relief.

He eventually placed his book down and fell alseep, still keeping you close to him.

He would always keep you safe.

Not just from physical danger, from your depression and your thoughts, too.

fin. ♡

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

hii! so i read ur dating tom k hcs and i loved them, could i pls request dating bill hcs as well? hope u have a good day/night <3

(hello! Thank you for requesting and sorry if this is a bit messy but enjoy! Thank you for loving my Tom headcannons, and have a good night/day!)

Dating Bill Headcannons

He is probably the best choice to even be with

He's so amazing man

I feel like he would rather have a private and intimate relationship

He wouldn't want paparazzi and fans all in your guys' business

But paparazzi has gotten a couple pictures of you guys

And Lord

He looks so in love, when he looks at you it looks like he's full on smitten

When he is in a relationship, he will do his best to make it last and be happy

He doesn't want to lose any chance he has to be with you for as long as he can

When people flirt with you, either in front of him or just in general

He feels a little bad

Just a bit

There is a lot of bickering in the relationship

Playful banter

You guys play wrestle a lot probably just because to piss the other off

There are mistakes on both sides of the relationship as it probably is his and your first one

So get over those hurdles and it's all good

Switches from German to English on you a lor

So if you know German, amazing!

If you dont, pray someone can translate

Would love if you learned German for him if you didn't know before

Because since he is pretty popular he is busy, and he feels bad because he doesn't have much extra time even if he does he spends it with you

After people flirt with you he'll try his best to spend as much time as possible with you

Is the embodiment of the kid who you're parents dream about you bringing home only for him to turn around and be the complete opposite

He's Bill, he can be flirty, shy and anything at any given time

He's not all that blatant about affection in public

Mostly hand holding and small kisses or kisses on the cheek or holding your waist

But in private is a whole other story

Mans is not letting go

It feels like he is glued to you

He loves doing your makeup to match his

Just you like straddling his lap as you just let him do your makeup

It's perfect

You guys are a pretty popular couple

Lots of rumors about you guys but you both ignore them

He gets asked about you a lot interviews

He is happy to answer and and all given questions as long as they don't cross a line

He is proud to say out loud he is dating you

He is down bad man

Matching outfits all the way

You guys probably have whole fan pages about you guys

You inspire some songs, some are just for you two and one or two he has released to the public

"Yeah, that one is about (Name)."

He says it with the biggest smile on his face

Tom teases his brother so much

Bill denies being totally smitten until you come into the room

He likes sitting next to you no matter where

Will have a hand on your thigh just because

His hands are sometimes cold so don't be alarmed when it's freezing

You guys go shopping and he's full on making outfits for you to show him

Full on show and spending hours in a shop

He does not care

You guys get lost a lot when you guys wander off

Gustav has found you both in multiple parks in the middle of the night

He will pull you up on stage when he wants

If your style is similar to his, he is full on in love

Even if it isn't, he likes how your style would contrast with his

He lets you do his makeup

Like Tom, is not threatened by his bandmates or brother if you get close to them

Would actually prefer if you were friends with them so you can come along and spend more time with him

If you're in the band, he is having the time of his life on stage

And if you're not, he's still gonna spot you out in the crowd

Always wants to make you proud of dating him when he is performing

He likes the fans, but would prefer just hugs and not kisses from them since he is dating you

If you're okay with it, he's fine with it, but if you're not he would ask them to please not kiss him

He doesn't want to risk your relationship

He is an asshole a lot of times

Idk if it's on purpose or he's joking around

He can be an asshole

Of you play an instrument or sing, he thinks it is legit a match made in heaven

Likes laying in bed with his head on your chest instead of the other way around

He would be devastated if you guys ever broke up or went on a break

Is trying his hardest to make up with you even in arguments

He is not letting the relationship go easily

[simpingforthemm]

Could I have a carmen Aziza fic where Yn is new to the prison and she always feels like someone’s staring at her and one day she catches carmen staring at her and gets really flustered then carmen starts flirting with her and becomes posessive over her then one day she drags Yn to the library and kisses her and basically confesses how she wants Yn all for herself

my love, mine all mine

my love mine all mine - mitski

word count: 5.9k

warnings: obsessive, possessive and protective behavior, flirting, kissing, toxic behavior, a bit of violence, threats, cursing, stalking, harry potter part 2 hate (I'm truly sorry)

summary: y/n is new to the prison and always feels like she is being watched. one night in the tv room, she turns around to the person who is watching her, only then realizing how gorgeous her observer is. they form a bond through several sets of events, slowly falling for each other. y/n slowly gets to know ouija's protective and possessive nature and at one birthday party of y/n's bunkmate, that behavior hits its peak. provocated by jealousy, frustration and confusing feelings, ouija makes a messy confession, explaining how she wants y/n all to herself

a/n: heyy, sorry that this took so long! I had a lot going on with school and writer's block so that I literally had no motivation to write. Anyway, I put a lot of work into this and I hope you like it (pls tell me what you think!!). I hope the flirting isn't too awkward, I'm still figuring out how to do that. I hope you enjoy and that I've done your idea justice. also this takes place in season 4

You were walking towards the entrance of Litchfield Penitentiary, the prison where you would be spending the next 3 years of your life. You had been charged with drug trafficking and distribution, all because some scared little snitch who didn't want to go to prison had ratted the whole cartel out. Even your drug lord was now facing a sentence of 9 years. 9 fucking years.

Your lawyer, who had defended you in trial, had been really shitty and literally just gave up on you. He didn't even try to make your sentence shorter, that sorry excuse of a man. Lazy fuck.

Morello, the weird Italian lady who drove you and some other people down to the prison, opened the gate and let you and the other new inmates inside. You couldn't believe you were now an "inmate", it was so weird to think of yourself that way.

"Welcome home everyone!", she exclaimed, giving you an encouraging smile.

You were lucky to get out of the cold van, it was January after all and since it had already snowed, the temperature had dropped down several degrees. So it was a relief to step into the warmer walls of the prison, not having to freeze your ass off in the snow.

The first thing you noticed when you stepped into the halls was how crowded it was. You were tempted to just turn around and run, trying to escape the stuffy air and suffocating feeling that was slowly spreading inside of you. Other inmates were constantly passing your little group, shooting you intimidating glances or smiling dangerously at you. You were uncomfortable, but not scared.

It just reminded you of the halls of your high school back then. Loud, uncomfortable and always overfilled. And god, the popular girls who used to bully you. To say the least, you were used to this.

Morello guided you through the prison, showing you where the commissary, bathrooms and everything else was. You were just passing the TV room, looking inside for a second when you made eye contact with a brown haired woman. The woman frowned at you, looking you up and down. You frowned back and kept walking, turning away from the door.

What the fuck was that?

You sighed and shook your head, telling yourself not to think too much of it. It had only been a small encounter, nothing too significant. At least not enough to get you in trouble. For now.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You were shown to your dorm, where you occupied the bunk above a woman named Brandy Epps. It was obvious she was extremely racist, you even heard her discussing something about "white lives matter" or "white pride", which you took as a sign to stay the fuck away from her. She continued to make dirty comments about other inmates in the prison while you were busy making your bed.

You turned around to listen to her when you were done, staring at her in disgust and listening to the insults that were coming out of her mouth so easily. You shook your head in disbelief.

You must've been staring at her for too long as the woman turned around, obviously pissed off.

"You got some kind of problem?", she questioned threateningly, getting closer to where you were standing.

"No", you huffed, looking away. You really didn't want to start any trouble on your first day. Best to avoid tricky situations.

"Good. I see you staring like that again, we got a problem, you hear me?"

You sighed. You should've known people would have anger issues in here. That people would get aggressive over the smallest things, because they didn't have anything better to do. Because prison was a shithole and it was fucking tiring to simply just exist there. You certainly didn't want to end up like her, but you feared you were going to have no choice in the future.

"Sure."

Before she could say anything else, you made your way to the cafeteria for dinner.

Due to the prison's overcrowding, the blocks were divided up at each meal. You and your block ate with Cell Block C or the so-called "Spanish Harlem", as Morello had already explained to you.

With your plate of food in hand, you sat down at the end of some table and started eating. You were extremely hungry, exhausted from the stress of arriving in the prison.

Suddenly, you felt two pairs of eyes burn holes into your back and you just knew someone was staring at you. You forced yourself to not turn around, not wanting to start a fight on your first day. One never knew what could happen in prison, you might get jumped just because you sat in the wrong seat or stared at someone the wrong way, almost like it did with the racist bitch back in your dorm.

It made you uncomfortable but you focused on the disgusting brown liquid in front of you that was supposed to be "chili con carne", forcing it down your throat and hoping, no praying, that that person was going to leave you alone.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

The next few days you felt as if you were being watched the entire time, feeling that burning sensation in your back again. There wasn't a single moment where you didn't turn around every single second while walking to the showers or the cafeteria.

You were extremely paranoid.

But every time you did, there were always too many people in the halls to really make out someone who could be stalking you.

So you just kept on going about your day, minding your business.

Until you couldn't anymore.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

It was Friday night, which today should've been movie night, but it got canceled and now everyone was in a bad mood. It wasn't often that something nice like this happened and it was a good escape from the tiring everyday routine the inmates had in the prison. You got to watch cool movies, eat snacks from the commissary and chill with your friends.

Instead, you were now sitting in the tv room, just reading your book in a chair next to Morello, who had unfortunately forced you to come along.

"Come on, Y/N! I promise it'll be fun. You can bring your boring book, even though it is a TV room, meaning you go there to watch TV and not to…read. Usually. But I'm sure they'll make an exception!", she had said to you after finding you alone on your bunk, wrapped in your blanket. You had rolled your eyes at her but gotten up from your bunk nevertheless, admitting defeat.

You had actually been enjoying the silence in your dormitory from everyone being gone, but of course, that just had to be interrupted.

Now you were sitting there, amongst all those other people, just trying to read your book in peace. But, and honestly what else did you expect, there was the piercing set of eyes again, just watching your every move. You were actually so sick of it now. Why was this person looking at you the whole time? Why were you so interesting?

This time, you actually decided to turn around and not ignore them like you had done the other times.

You spotted her immediately. It was the woman who had frowned at you on your first day! The woman with the brown hair!

And now she was smirking at you. How was she not looking away or ashamed that you caught her?

Your eyes widened as you slowly scanned her. She was drop-dead-gorgeous. She had curves that were to die for, these stunning dark brown eyes…

You felt yourself blush and turned away. God, hadn't you promised yourself to not find anyone attractive here? Especially not people that could possibly be dangerous?

Well, you had just failed miserably and pathetically.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

Someone pulled a chair up in front of you, sitting on it backwards, using the back of the chair as an armrest.

You were looking down on the ground, burying your face in your book when a finger hooked itself under your chin, tilting it up.

The drop-dead-gorgeous woman was right in front of you, her eyes scanning your face, biting her lip.

She outstretched her hand to you.

"Ouija. Nice to meet you." Her eyes shone with something you couldn't quite decipher.

"Y/N", you introduced yourself, feeling shy in front of this beautiful woman, shaking her hand. She held onto it a little longer than normal, looking you directly in your eyes.

"That's a beautiful name."

She flashed you an amused smile, recognizing your anxiousness.

"Yo, there's no need to be shy, chica" (cutie/girl), Ouija said while moving in a little closer.

"Not for a pretty girl like you at least.", she said with a lowered voice.

She smiled at you once again and you felt your cheeks heat up.

"Thank you", you mumbled, not really knowing what else to say.

Ouija smirked.

"You're welcome, muñequita" (dolly)

Fuck.

"Anyhow, what you in for, mama?", she asked, slowly leaning back again as if she didn't just audibly make you gasp.

"Drug trafficking and distribution", you answered, avoiding her gaze.

"Yo, damn! So you a 'little miss drug dealer' then?" She laughed.

"Certainly. Right hand woman of my drug lord, thank you very much", you responded, bowing your head a little. She chuckled, shaking her head.

"Impressive, yo. I like a woman in power. It's hot."

You felt yourself blush again. God, this woman somehow had the ability to make you flustered very easily.

"So, what did you do?", you questioned.

"WIC Fraud. I killed three somebody's - nobodies -", she pointed to a tattoo that she had right next to her eye, three black teardrops, "and then I get popped for fucking fraud. You believe that shit?"

You shook your head, confused as to how they didn't find out about her killing all those people but charged her for the fraud. Maybe if you had committed another crime besides the drug thing and turned yourself in, you would be facing less time. You were suddenly deep in your thoughts, wondering about that, so that you didn't notice Ouija standing up beside you.

"All right, mama, I'mma let you get back to your book here. We'll see each other around", she said optimistically.

Ouija walked back to her seat, but not without winking at you and letting her hand brush against your arm.

You didn't get the chance to ask why she had been staring at you this whole time before really introducing herself to you, but right now, that matter seemed pretty unimportant to you. You felt starstruck from the interaction with the latina, just staring at the words in your book and not being able to focus at all. The conversation had been way too short and you already wanted to talk to her more.

But what you didn't know is that you wouldn't have to wait long until the two of you would speak again. Carmen had taken a liking to you and she was ready to explore what might develop between you two. At least she already knew that she was capable of making your cheeks go red within a matter of seconds.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You were doing research in the library, or more like trying to find one of your favorite books, Harry Potter. You were trying to find some comfort in this cold place and what better way to do it than with your favorite literature? You wandered through the fiction aisle, scanning through the books.

There it was, on the highest shelf. But, of course, as expected, you were not tall enough to reach it. You felt so incredibly pathetic right now, there was no chair in sight to help you, no stool for you to stand on.

„Yo, need some help there?“, you heard someone ask. You turned around to the voice.

It was Ouija. She was leaning against one of the shelves, smirking at your attempts to stand on your tiptoes to grab the book, of course failing miserably.

„Yes, please“, you said, just a tad embarassed.

„Which book?“, she asked.

„Harry Potter“

She nodded, reaching up, taking it out without any strain.

„So, the goblet of fire“, she said, twisting the book in her hands.

„It was one of my favorite books growing up. I’m already done with all of the books I was allowed to bring in here so I thought I’d do a little nostalgia trip“

Your fingertips touched as she passed you the book.

„I liked it too as a little kid. But my favorite book was always the chamber of secrets“

„Girl – no offense – but are you serious?“

Ouija frowned, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.

„What do you mean?“, she questioned, crossing her arms in front of her face.

You smiled, shaking your head.

„Nah, I don’t want to destroy your favorite childhood book for you. I have a very strong opinion when it comes to Harry Potter.“

„No worries, yo, I can handle it. Give it to me“, Ouija said lowly, tilting her head. You bit your lip, rubbing your hands together, getting ready to go.

„Well, I think Ginny’s absolutely insufferable in that book, I mean sure, she was influenced by Voldemort but still, I think it’s not right that she played the „weak, needing to be saved“ girl in that book. It’s not exactly feminist. Also I think the book doesn’t really add to the series, it’s just kind of there as a „filler“ or an information dump. Also, the thing with the diary is just unrealistic. Why wouldn’t anyone notice that it’s in Ginny’s posession? It just doesn’t make sense.“

You grit your teeth in worry, hoping you didn’t go to far.

„I’m sorry, was that too far?“, you asked.

„Nah, I think you’re right actually. Yo, I might have to rethink my favorite childhood book“, Ouija laughed, rubbing her neck.

„I’d be happy to help. I know quite a lot about the series actually“, you explained proudly.

„I figured. That pretty face can convince me of anything, man, I’m sure“

You looked down, trying to hide the blush spreading on your cheeks.

„Don’t hide it“, Ouija said, tilting your chin up. You looked up into her beautiful dark brown eyes, getting lost in them.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

It was late in the afternoon, the sun was already setting and the inmates had a few hours left to catch some air outside before the prison would close its gates, making it time for lights out. You had put on your winter coat and beanie, ready to take a little stroll in the yard. Your hands were covered in thick gloves, protecting you from the harsh January wind

Today, you were just going to take a little stroll around the yard, not that anything else was really possible here. You wish you would have some kind of space to run, get rid of all the energy that you weren’t able to put to use properly.

You were just about to round the corner at the mailbox when you heard a noise.

You stopped in your tracks when you heard someone sniffle and sob.

Frowning, you started walking towards the sound and soon you were able to make out the person who they were coming from. They had brown curly hair - Oh shit! Ouija! You stopped yourself before you were going to run over to her and make sure she's okay.

You were unsure if you should approach her at such a sensitive time.

You wouldn't know how she was going to react, the two of you had known each other barely a hot second.

But you knew that if you were alone and crying in a prison and the person discovering you had good intentions, you would want to be comforted too. And that was good enough for you. You hoped you were making the right decision.

"Ouija, hey, what's wrong?", you asked worriedly, slowly kneeling down beside her.

Her head snapped up, her eyes widening when she realized it was you. She quickly wiped her tears away, trying to find her composure. You couldn’t help but admire her, she was even pretty when she cried, her lashes were stuck together, her cheeks were flushed… God, wrong moment!! Get it together Y/N...

"Oh shit. Hey, didn't hear you coming. Yo, how's it going?"

"I'm fine, but you don't seem to be. What's the matter?"

"Nah, I'm fine, nothing to worry about", she said quickly. You raised your eyebrows, not believing anything she said.

"What? I said I’m fine, man“, Ouija spat, putting up all her defenses.

"Look, I know we don’t really know each other, but I’m not gonna judge you for showing emotion or opening up. It’s human.“

Ouija huffed, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Fuck, fine. Shit, you're stubborn, girl. It's my son. He's in the hospital because of some gang activity in his block and…I'm not there for him, man. I'm in fucking prison. And I can't do anything about it."

You sighed. You knew what she was talking about. You felt the same. Being in prison made you feel so stuck, even though you had only been there for a few days. You weren’t there for your loved ones, the world around you kept turning and changing while you were locked away. Your friends had also seemingly already forgotten about you. Maybe they were all just glad you were gone.

"Honestly, I get it. I have a little sister, she just turned 5. She's growing up so fast and in a year, she'll already be in primary school. I'm missing out on her making her first friends there, I can't help her with her homework or comfort her when she has a bad day. It's torture. So yeah, I can relate. Nothing bad happened to her yet, fortunately, but you know the world out there. I can’t protect her from the harm she might experience out there."

The two of you were silent for a second, saying nothing.

"The thing is, you can't change anything about it. As much as it sucks, you gotta figure out how to deal with that shit. You gotta trust that your son knows you love him and that you being in here has nothing to do with him."

That flipped a switch in Ouija. She did love her son, a lot. She had just got to find a way to show it to him, especially right now. A small smile spread on her face as an idea popped up in her head.

She felt your hand touch her back, stroking it slowly.

Ouija turned to you, the woman who she had been obsessed with ever since she had entered the walls of this prison. The woman who she had frowned at when she made eye contact with her at her first day. The woman who frowned back. She knew that you knew that she had watched you the first few days upon your arrival. You were just so mesmerizing to her, she somehow felt drawn to you.

"Inmates! Back inside!", you heard a guard shout loudly. You sighed. The roughness of the CO's was still something you had to get used to.

"Yo, we should probably go before it gets serious or some shit. You never know if these fuckers are gonna pull out a gun or not", Ouija said, outstretching her hand to you, desperate to get you away from possible danger.

You nodded, letting her help you up.

As you were about to walk past the guard, you noticed that your shoe was untied. You stopped, reaching down to tie it, but the CO was not having it.

„INMATE! KEEP IT MOVING! I HAVEN’T GOT ALL FUCKING DAY, YOU UNDERSTAND??!“, he shouted aggressively, about to yank you up from the ground, when Ouija threw herself inbetween you two.

From your place on the ground, you didn’t hear what she said to the CO or what made him back off of the two of you. You only saw her enraged facial expression as she turned to help you up, once again. You were in a complete state of shock, this being the first time you were properly yelled at by a guard. You felt Ouija wrap an arm around your shoulder, guiding you back inside.

„Inmate Aziza, I would fucking throw you down to the SHU, but I’m fucking exhausted from today so I will let you off EASILY because I’m so nice with just a shot. For the both of you that is!“, he spat at the two of you as you walked back inside.

Ouija saw the broken look on your face and from that point, there was no way in hell that she was ever going to leave your side. She felt protective of you suddenly, she wanted to rip that guard’s head off, no, she wanted to choke him until his words got stuck in his fucking throat for ever talking to you in that way.

She wanted to shield you from any and all bad things in this place. She wanted you to herself, wanted no one fucking near you, except for her. Her hand grabbed your shoulder tighter.

She stood in front of you, so you were facing her. Butterflies erupted in her stomach as your gaze met hers. Your eyes were so beautiful. You were slightly looking up to her, as Ouija was a bit taller than you.

„Hey, yo, are you okay, mama? That guard was pretty rough on you“, she asked you, her voice soft as velvet. Tears threatened to spill from your eyes, but Ouija wasn’t letting that happen. She grabbed your chin, caressing your cheek with her thumb.

„Yo, no crying, pretty woman, we’ve already had enough of that today.“

„I love that movie“, you chuckled slightly, wiping your eyes with the sleeves of your shirt.

„Pretty Woman? White poor woman fucks rich white man and falls in love? Nah, that shit’s too predictable.“

„Exactly. One already knows how the movie ends, but I still like it“

Ouija scoffed, ruffling your hair. She leads you back to your dorm, glaring at Epps as the bald-headed woman was about to harass you again. Epps backed up with raised hands, whispering:

„I wasn’t even about to do anything...“

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You were casually walking to the showers, towel and toiletries in hand. It was 5am in the morning, so the line wasn't long.

You had gotten up early for the hot water, your bunkmate Epps complaining that you were making too much noise, disrupting her very important sleep. There were only 2 hours until she had to get up anyway. Epps luckily hadn’t bothered you too much the past few days, thanks to Ouija, who had given her death glares whenever the two of you had been hanging around each other, which had been quite often. You had spent most of your time with her, she had helped you settle into the prison and made you laugh almost all the time. You had been there for her during all the announcements she got from the hospital about her son and celebrated with her when the doctor told her that he was going to be okay.

You hadn’t really gotten acquainted with any of the other women at the prison, as every time you tried to talk to one of them, you felt Ouija’s glare on the both of you or you got pulled away from the other person because she suddenly „needed to talk to you very urgently“. Of course you knew that she was jealous somehow, even though she had no reason to be. One of the times when she had dragged you away, the two of you had gone to the chapel. Ouija hadn’t said anything as she had taken your hand and pulled you along with her.

She had lifted you onto the stage, where performances or speeches were given, but kept standing on the ground herself. She still stayed silent as she locked eyes with you and slowly ran one of her hands up your thigh. She leaned in a little bit when her hand reached the waistband of your pants, her eyes on your lips. You could basically feel the electricity sizzling between the two of you. It was like the two of you were always meant to end up so close to each other, like this. Your foreheads were already touching, your lips barely inches away from each other, when the door to the chapel slammed shut and the both of you immediately flew off of each other. Pidge was calling for Ouija, telling her that Maria was calling a meeting. Ouija, frustrated, promising you she would be back for you, „continuing where you left of“. And now you were here.

You stepped into one of the shower cabinets, turning on the shower head.

You sighed as the warm water washed over your body, immediately making you sleepy again. You hadn’t slept really well with that racist woman Epps beneath you. You never knew what she might do and you always had to sleep with one eye open. It was exhausting and definitely took a strain on your body.

"Mornin', muñequita."

You turned around to the voice, looking directly into Ouija's eyes. She looked a little sleepy, but her half-closed eyes were still roaming your body, drinking in your frame. With just a look, she was able to to make you sweat, blush, avoid her gaze… it was nerve-wracking. With a towel wrapped around your body, you stepped outside of the shower and towards the fully dressed Ouija.

"Hey there“, you answered, yawning.

"How you doing, mama?"

"I'm good, a little tired still." She nodded understandingly.

"Glad my pretty girl is doing well", she smiled, leaning against the wall.

You blushed a little and looked to your feet, trying to hide your reddened cheeks.

"Yo, come over here, mama", she beckoned.

You looked left and right to check if anyone was there who could possibly see you before you moved out of the shower cabin and over to where Ouija was standing.

As soon as you were standing in front of her Ouija grabbed your shoulders and pulled you close, wrapping her arms around your lower torso. She pressed a kiss to your forehead, allowing you to rest your head on her chest.

„Y/N?“

„Yeah?“

„I wanted to say thanks for the time you found me..you know, crying, and comforted me and shit. I didn’t deserve that and I’m still a shit mom, but I talked to my son on the phone and...he’s coming to visitation next week“

You squealed in excitement, jumping up a little bit, so excited for Ouija.

„Ouija, that’s great! I’m so happy for you!“

You wrapped your arms around her neck , embracing her in a hug.

Ouija grabbed you by your hips and switched positions so that now you were pressed against the wall. Both of her hands were placed next to your head while yours were busy holding up that towel of yours.

„You’re so cute when you’re happy, you know that?“, Ouija asked, biting her bottom lip. She leaned in closer, taking your face inbetween her hands. Your eyes closed in anticipation, ready to finally connect with her, to finally feel the full extent of the electricity between you too. She leaned in, leaned in, you started feeling dizzy of her scent, of her presence...

BANG! The metal door to the showers slammed shut, loud voices coming from the doorway. Ouija immediately let go of you, distancing herself, and as some of the other inmates walked past you and entered the showers, you tried to act as nothing had happened before. You exchanged a frustrated glance with her, were you ever going to be able to kiss?

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

It was your bunkmate Epps' birthday and she made like this whole deal out of it. Almost everyone in this prison was invited, including you and Ouija and almost every single lesbian which was weird, since Epps was definitely homophobic.

But she and her friends did know how to throw a party, you had to leave her that. There was a snack bar with drinks, a dance floor and colorful garlands reading "happy birthday".

You had just entered the overfilled room, completely overwhelmed, not knowing what to do or where to stand or where to sit. You were looking around for Ouija, finding her in a corner of the room, next to Pidge and Zirconia.

She was staring down everyone in the room, a grumpy expression on her face. You know how frustrated she had been the past few days, you were about to kiss two times, but always had been interrupted by one of the other inmates. Privacy was basically non-existent in prison and by now, the two of you were so desperate to kiss, you almost felt like two pathetic lesbian teenage girls.

You were walking towards her, pushing through the crowd, and as you approached them, Zirconia noticed you, her face lighting up.

"Y/N! Hi!", she exclaimed happily.

Ouija's head immediately snapped in your direction and her entire demeanor changed. Her grumpy face disappeared, her eyes lit up and a smile spread across her lips.

"Well, yo, look who showed up!", she said, genuinely happy to see you.

You smiled at her and Pidge.

You looked around for a chair to pull up next to the group, but of course, every single one was taken. This did not go unnoticed by Ouija and she certainly did not seem too unhappy about this fact as her smirk widened.

"Come, muñeca, you can sit here", she said, pointing to her man spread legs. Damn, you thought, really really wanting to, but not being sure if it might be risky. You looked around to see if anyone was looking except for Zirconia and Pidge, but everyone was too focused on themselves to even slightly care about the two of you. And even so, you didn’t care.

You lowered yourself onto her lap and immediately felt her arms tightly wrap around your torso.

„Good girl, put those pretty thighs on me“, she whispered in your ear, her hand stroking your leg softly. Your eyes widened, the familiar blush spreading on your cheeks. „Mi amor, mio todo mio“, (my love, mine all mine) she mumbled, placing a kiss on your shoulder.

The evening progressed without anyone even looking at you. You sat on Ouija’s lap the entire time, wondering how it wasn’t taking a strain on her legs, conversing with her, Zirconia and Pidge. You did not once go to the buffet because you were so immersed in the conversation you were having with them but nevertheless, you were thirsty.

„I’ll just get something to drink really quick, do you want anything?“, you said to Ouija, hopping off of her lap.

„Nah, I’m good, thanks though“

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

You were standing at the bar, deciding what drink you were going to get, not that there were a lot of options, this was prison after all. Possibilities weren’t exactly endless.

„Hi there“, a voice greeted you, coming out of nowhere.

You jumped, letting out a little shriek.

„Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you“, the woman next to you said worriedly, but you only laughed.

„It’s fine, I get scared easily.“

„You’re new here right?“, she asked, tilting her head in curiosity.

„Yeah, I arrived here about two weeks ago, so my stay hasn’t exactly been long“

„Ah, so a newbie. That’s why I haven’t seen you around.“

You nodded, conversing in a little small talk with her. You already felt Ouija staring at you, knowing it was because of her protective and posessive nature, but you also wanted friends in here. You needed other people that you could rely on.

The woman, who turned out to be called Carla was telling you funny stories about other prisons she had been at and interactions she had with other inmates there and here at Litchfield.

You laughed loudly, finding her absolutely hilarious. While you and the woman were joking around, Ouija was boiling with anger and jealousy. She tried to keep her cool, „take a fucking chill pill“, like Zirconia had advised her. But it was really hard when she hadn’t even kissed you yet, didn’t even get to call you hers yet. Maybe the possibility of somebody else still being able to snatch you away was giving her the nerves. Maybe she would be more relaxed if she knew you were really hers.

Maybe. But right now, she just wanted to get you the fuck away from that other woman.

As you kept talking with Carla, you felt her put her hand on your waist.

„Um…“, you mumbled, looking over to Ouija. That was Carmen Aziza’s last straw. Nobody would touch her girl, not like that.

She stormed over to where you were standing and pushed the other woman off of you and to the ground where she landed with a loud bang. She stood over the woman, placing her thick boot onto her chest, compromising her airways.

„Touch her again and yo“, she laughed bitterly, „I’ll fuck you up“.

Before you could properly register what was happening, you felt yourself being grabbed by the wrist and pulled away. You didn’t know where you were going, as you were still finding your way around the prison, when you reached the door to the library. It was completely silent, the only sound being you getting pushed against one of the shelves.

Ouija stood in front of you, placing one of her hands beside your head. She used the other one to harshly grab your chin, lifting it up so you were looking at her. Her facial expression was one of anger, jealousy and displeasement.

„I don’t know who that other woman thinks she is, but she better know that you’re mine. Ever since you stepped into the walls of this prison, shit, I knew I had to have you. You're mine, amorcita. You're all mine and yo, guess what? I ain't about fucking sharing. I can’t hide how I feel about you anymore, munequita. Not when 1000 other bitches are this close to you every day. I love you.“

Ouija’s face was full of worry, anticipation of what you thought of her confession, if you felt the same.

„I’m yours“, you said, breathless, and that was all it took for Ouija to smash her lips against you and press you further into the wooden shelves. Her scent intoxicated you, all you saw, smelled, heard, touched was her. She was your whole world and you were hers. Her warm body was pressing into yours, her hands were roaming your body, diving underneath your shirt. Finally, you could do what you waited so long for. Her hands were in your hair, her tongue was dancing with yours. You forgot that you were in prison, you forgot about the world around you.

All there was, was you and her. Your love, yours all yours.

[bingbongsupremacy]

Happy Anniversary

Pairing: Ellie Williams x Reader

Warnings: Creep, pet names, use of y/n

Summary: An anger filled fight doesn't stop Ellie from Standing up for you.

*Not Proof Read* TLOU Masterlist

*****

" -god, how many times do I have to tell you, I'm fucking sorry, okay? I completely forgot about our date. It's been a long week. " Ellie groans, running a hand through her messy hair.

" Our date? " I narrow my eyes in disbelief. " It's our anniversary, you absolute ass. I've been reminding you about it for the past fucking five days. I planned everything, Ellie. All you had to do was fucking show up and you couldn't even do that. "

Ellie's jaw clenches in frustration. Her eyes darken. Annoyance seeps through her tone. " It's one fucking day. I get it, we've been dating for an entire year, whoopie. " Ellie mocks. " We don't need to plan something on a stupid fucking day to remind ourselves how long we've been together. "

Sadness fills my already rage filled heart. Did she really not give a shit? " That's not the point, Ellie. I barely see you anymore. You're always on patrol...I just wanted to spend time with you. And-and you can't even spare an hour for me anymore! "

Ellie's eyes narrow. She stands up, finally meeting my gaze. " Don't even. You spend all your time in that stupid bakery. Doing what? Baking fucking cakes. At least I'm trying to protect us-keep the fucking bad shit outside so you can keep on baking pastries. I'm on patrol for us. "

Rage seeps out of Ellie's every pore. Her face is lit up from the fire place, casting a dark shadow across her tired features.

My heart shatters. Stupid pastries? Does she think that little of my job? " I don't need you to protect me. I can take care of myself. " I spit. " I've survived without you for years, Ellie. I can do it again. I don't need you. "

For a moment Ellie's angry expression seems to break. Sadness flashes through her eyes, leaving just as fast as it came. Could it be the lighting?

" You don't need me? Fucking fine. " Ellie snatches her worn coat from the floor. " I'll see you around. " Ellie snaps towards the door.

Regret floods my body. " Ellie-Wait! I didn't mean it. " I chase after her. " Ellie! "

Ellie doesn't respond. Instead she slams my front door, stopping me from continuing after her. The loud sound bounces off my dark walls, mocking my hurting heart.

All I wanted was to spend time with her.

---------

Ellie doesn't need me either.

For weeks I've thought back the our argument, where everything went wrong. I doubt Ellie has. She's spent the last 3 weeks partying with Cat.

It's not like I'm unfamiliar with the quietness filling my house. I spend most of my nights alone, only having another person there when Ellie sneaks in after patrol. This time, the silence is haunting.

Ellie's still pissed. She hasn't bothered to pick up anything of hers. Whenever we're in the same area, she finds a way to get out of there fast.

Honestly, I'm still pissed at her. The one time in 2 weeks I ask for her to make time for me, and she still can't find the fucking find a way to.

I make my way out of the bar, flinching at the freezing temperature outside. The streets are quiet. Only the flickering lights from nearby street lights break the darkness. Everyone's home.

I make my way down the street, taking my time look at the night sky.

A shiver runs down my spine when the sound of crunching snow fills my ears. Not from my shoes. From someone else.

" H-hey, baby. Where're you heading off to all alone? " A slurred voice asks.

I turn the face the owner. It's one of the newer people Tommy brought in today. " That's none of your business. "

I shove my freezing hands into my pockets.

The mans' eyes narrow. His grinning expression fading into a more frustrated one. " That's no way to talk to your new neighbor, sweet cheeks. Especially when he's being so nice to you. "

Disgust and fear fill my stomach. This guy can't be serious.

The tart smell of booze oozes off of his clothes. He certainly didn't wait long to find the bar.

" Why don't you leave me alone, neighbor. " I try to stand up straight, make myself look intimidating. Inside, my heart pounds quickly.

The man steps closer to me, causing me to take a step back. My heels makes contact with the snow covered curb. My body falls backwards, my arms stretching back to catch my fall.

A stinging pain fills my left hand. The white snow underneath quickly turns a cherry shade of red. The icy dust enrages my cut hand, making the injury hurt so much more.

" You just saved me a whole lotta time, baby. " The man chuckles, stepping towards me, grabbing ahold of the back of my head.

" Hey you, ugly motherfucker, back the fuck off. " Ellie's familiar voice cuts through the bitter air. She steps out of the shadows from behind the man, carrying a blade in hand. " Now. "

The man chuckles. " What? Is this your little bitch? Shoulda known, they look like a- " The man doesn't have time to finish his sentence.

Ellie lunges at the man, taking him off guard as she loops behind him, holding the shiny blade to his neck. " Unless you have a death wish, I suggest you shut the fuck up. "

His hand lets go of my head, obviously surprised by the sudden movement. The mans eyes widen in confusion and shock. " Hey- "

Ellie presses the blade in the mans throat. Not hard enough to kill him, but hard enough to draw a few beads of blood.

" Please! " The man begs, obviously not expecting this outcome.

Ellie pushes the man away. " Get the fuck out of here, you fucking coward. "

The man scrambles away from us. He hurries back in the direction of the bar, clutching his veiny neck with his large hand.

" Thank you. " I let out a breath of relief. " I had no idea- "

Ellie turns her eyes towards me once she's sure the man has gone away. " What the hell are you doing out here this late? Are you fucking crazy? What the fuck is wrong with you! " Ellie steps towards me. " You could've been hurt! God, do you even think? "

As much as want to fight back, I know she's right. I should've left with Jesse and Dina. So many new people have been brought into Jackson, too many to meet them all. There's bound to be some shady characters in the mix.

" I didn't think anything would happen. " Tears sting the back of my eyes. I tear my gaze away, not wanting Ellie to see me weak.

Ellie scoffs. " You're not a fucking ghost, y/n. People can see you walking out here alone and the fucked up ones will want to hurt you. "

" I know. " I whisper, trying to cover up the shaky sound of my voice.

Ellie's eyes soften. " Y/N..." She sighs. " I didn't mean-Is that blood? " Ellie rushes towards me, snatching my hand from the ground. " Oh my god, why didn't you say anything? "

I try to pull my hand away. " It's just a scrape. "

" Your hand looks like a fucking Saw movie - " Ellie holds my wrist tightly, not allowing me to break away.

" Ellie! What the fuck. " My stomach churns at the sight of my hand. I didn't realize it was bleeding this bad.

Ellie puts her other hand on the side of my waist. " Come on, we need to get this fixed before you get an infection. Who knows what that fucker was carrying and if it spreads. "

I stand up and I'm quickly ushered towards Ellie's garage. " You're not funny. "

" I'm not trying to be. Did you see the crust on his eyes? I don't think that's natural. Not to mention his dirty fingers. " Ellie mutters.

We walk the rest of the way in silence, Ellie not moving her hand from my waist.

Light cuts through the darkness of Ellie's garage as she flicks on the switch. A pile of clothes sits in the corner next to her bed, obviously dirty from patrol. Various things liter the floor, just the way it was before I met her.

" It's a bit of a mess...I wasn't expecting company. " Ellie rubs the back of her neck, obviously a little embarrassed by the sight of her room. " I've been pretty busy. "

I roll my eyes. " With Cat, I know. "

Ellie's eyes widen. " What? Cat? "

" I know you've been hanging out with her. " I don't meet her gaze. I don't care if she hangs out with Cat. It's just the fact she didn't tell me about it. I guess we were on a break...She didn't need to tell me anything.

Ellie grabs a small bag from on top of her desk. She gently pushes me onto the bed before pulling open the bag. " It's not like that...We didn't do anything. " She dabs the cut with a little towel.

" Yeah, for sure. Look Ellie, I don't give a shit who you fuck. " I say through clenched teeth. Obviously I'm lying. " Just don't pretend you having been with someone else. "

Ellie's eyes meet mine, confusion filling her expression. " Y/N, it's not like that. Cat and I...we aren't anything. I met with her 2 times to talk to her about...fuck about how to make everything up to you. I didn't fuck Cat. I would never do that to you. "

My eyes widen. " What? "

Ellie continues to bandage my hand. " I told Cat what happened. She thought it was pretty shitty of me to stand you up on our anniversary. " Ellie sighs and lets go of my hand. " Look, I've never done this before. I've never been in a relationship this long. I-I'm fucking terrified. What am I supposed to do? " Ellie admits.

I've never seen her this...vulnerable before. She tends to keep things bottled up, something I've tried to get her to stop doing for her own sake, but it's never worked.

" I don't want to ruin you, y/n. I've ruined everything else in my fucking life. No one I love ever fucking gets a happy ending. I mean, look at Joel and Riley...I don't want you to end up like them. " Ellie's voice cracks.

" Ellie...I had no ideas..." I put my hand on her arm.

" How would you? I've been ignoring you for months. I just...I didn't want something to happen to you. I know that's a shitty excuse, but it's true. You mean so fucking much to me, Y/N. I don't know what I'd do without you. " I scan Ellie's face for any signs of dishonesty. She's sincere.

" Nothing is going to happen to me. Ellie, you can't do this to yourself, blame yourself for everything that happened. You had no idea what was going on. You have to stop torturing yourself with this. You aren't going to be able to live a full life if you're living in fear. " I try to reason with the woman.

Ellie swallows. " I just don't want you to get hurt. "

" Ellie, if something were to happen to me, I know you'd be right there to help me. I mean, look at what happened a little while ago. I'm going to be okay. Just please...don't ignore me. I want to be here for you. I want to spend time with you. " I pull the girl towards me. " I love you, Ellie Williams. I fucking love you so much. "

I feel Ellie tense at the words. We've never said I love you before.

Ellie shifts so her face is next to mine. Her hot breath fans over my cold lips. " I love you too. " She whispers.

I kiss her, pulling her body towards me. " You owe me a date. " I pant once we pull away.

" I owe you a lot of things. " Ellie sets her head on the crook of my shoulder. " I'll start with another kiss. "

[esmedelacroix]

Coffee Shop Love Pt.4

pairing: miguel o'hara x f!reader

summary: He's as stern and cold as the snow falling from the sky blanketing the bustling streets of Nueva York, Miguel O'Hara stumbles upon a hidden gem of a coffee shop just around the corner from Alchemax. Only problem is the annoying-as-shit smiley-ass barista.

contents: slow burn, no use of y/n, fluffmania, implied age gap, suggestive, forced proximity

author's note: Hi lovies, :( this part is coming to you very late >.< ! The semester is ending soon and I'm an academic weapon so I've been writing papers and studying, here's the fourth chapter for y'all :) ! I suggest you read this chapter while listening to "Strangers In The Night" by Frank Sinatra on repeat it sets the perfect tone for this chapter, enjoy...

word count: 1.6k

Pt.1, Pt.2, Pt.3, Pt.4, Pt. 5, Pt.6, Pt.7, Sequel: Sweet Tooth

You both looked down at your phones in disbelief. Your thoughts raced like a thousand wild stallions, galloping through your mind at breakneck speed What do we do? Will he have to stay over? How will he react when I tell him I have one bed? He couldn't fit on the couch to save his life. You thought to yourself trying to figure out what could be done.

"So a whole day here?" Miguel asked as the shock slowly dissipated from his face.

"Yeah, well I better lock up and turn the heaters on," you said as you got up the locked the doors.

"So uh, I live upstairs," you said awkwardly.

"Okay, I live several blocks down," He joked eliciting a chuckle from you as laughter danced lightly upon Miguel's chest.

"You know what I mean, I'm inviting you into my apartment," you said pointing at the stairs as a flush crept onto your cheeks.

"I'm just pulling your leg chula," he chuckled. You both walked up the stairs to your apartment. A melange of peppermint, gingerbread, and vanilla, like Santa's North Pole workshop in an aromatic form.

The fireplace crackled merrily, festive blankets were strewn across the couch, and a tray of gingerbread cookies patiently awaited their turn in the oven. Your apartment was the epitome of Holiday cheer and warmth. The exact opposite of Miguel's place. Which was currently dark cold and empty. Not a trace of color other than the black and dark blue that his interior designer had insisted on. But was the point of a home that didn't feel like anyone was living in it? Your house was all color. Your house had memories scattered over the wall just like in the shop. Your house had lights all around, messy blankets and pillows, dishes in the sink, and baked goods sprinkled all over the dining table.

"So sorry it's a little messy," you murmured timidly.

"That's fine, it's nice," he mumbled.

You both looked at each other awkwardly before turning away. "So, I only have one bed, and there's no way you're fitting on the couch so, I could take the couch," you thought aloud.

"Well I'm not going to make you sleep on your couch," he said.

"I'm fine with sharing the bed, as long as you don't make it weird," you said.

"Well you just made it weird by thinking that I was gonna make it weird," he quipped.

"Well, well, ditto," you rebutted.

"Ditto? Double ditto," he chuckled.

"Double double ditto times a million trillion gazillion," you giggled.

You both burst into a fit of laughter. You both agreed to take turns in the shower. You lent him your brother's old clothes that he had left the last time he visited. That was how Miguel ended up sitting on your couch with a generic pair of black and red plaid pj pants. With the ugliest ugly sweater on. You plopped down next to him, straight out of the shower.

Your hair smelled like fresh candy canes. He could smell it every time it would whip around when you cracked your neck. Your skin smelled faintly like sweet gingerbread and vallina. You had an interesting selection of Christmas-themed self-care. What's the use of 'sugar cookie' lip balm? I kind of want to taste it..., ew Miguel, he thought to himself.

"So since you have to spend all night and a whole day with me, you have to understand why I love Christmas so much. We're going to watch only the best holiday movie series ever, 'A Christmas Prince,'" you said excitedly as you got up and got some holiday treats and put them on the coffee table.

"This better not be some sappy romance," he groaned.

"Oh hunny, it's all the sap, all drama, and all stupidity and miscommunication. But that's what makes them so good," you explained.

Although Miguel was sure he would hate the movie, he was more invested in it than you were. Every time you would try to talk he would shush you, "I need to see what happens next," he would whisper as he strangled you squish mellow from anticipation.

You started messing with him by talking during the movie which got him so frustrated he threw a pillow at your face playfully. But you had taken this as a declaration of battle and started a pillow fight. It was full-on warfare and giggles all around. You could tell Miguel was holding back all of his strength because he could probably actually hurt you.

You pounced on Miguel, knocking him backward onto the couch. Pillows flew in the air around you as you both tumbled, your laughter turning into shared, breathless excitement.

You found yourself on top of him, faces inches apart, heartbeats racing. Your warm breaths hit each other's face, and you both lay there, staring into each other's eyes.

Miguel's playful smile slowly softened into something deeper, something more intimate. His eyes locked with yours, and for a moment, the world outside the room ceased to exist. It was just the two of you, lost in that brief moment of connection.

Your breath caught as the intensity of the moment enveloped you. You felt a magnetic pull towards Miguel, an unspoken attraction that had been simmering beneath the surface for far too long. The air between you crackled with unspoken words, and as your eyes locked, they shared a moment of understanding, a silent promise of what could be.

But just as quickly as it had come, the moment was broken by the sound of the timer on the oven going off, signifying to the two of you that the gingerbread was ready. The laughter returned, but now it held an extra layer of tension, a newfound awareness of the connection you had just shared.

You both get up, brush yourselves off, and head to the kitchen to take the baked goods out. "Why bake more when you have a million variants of baked goods everywhere?" Miguel inquired as he helped you put the slabs of gingerbread into your fridge to cool.

"I have to test and create the entire seasonal menu before I serve it," you explain.

"That sounds tiring..." he starts.

"No! It's actually really fun! Here try this red velvet cake," she said excitedly. Miguel was waiting for another opportunity to have your baking without having to outright ask you for some, and you knew that.

He took a bite and to no one's surprise, he loved it. But he wouldn't tell you that and tried not to let it show either. The rest of the night went on without a hitch until you were both exhausted. You took a look at the clock, [2:23 am]. Your eyelids felt heavier, and you could see Miguel start to blink for a little too long while trying to watch the third Christmas Prince movie. You used all the energy left in your body to get up. "C'mon big guy, we should get to bed," you said tapping his shoulder. All you got from him was a small smirk and picked up a pillow and whipped it at his face.

"You nasty!" you started before stopping and stomping into your room. Miguel followed you into your room chuckling lowly.

The moon cast a soft glow through the bedroom window, painting the room in muted silver hues as you and Miguel settled into bed. There was an unspoken tension between you two, a tangible distance that lingered in the cool air. The bed, once a refuge for dreams, now seemed an expanse to navigate cautiously. As the night unfolded, lost in the realm of dreams, you began to shiver subtly. Miguel noticed your discomfort, remembering you telling him that you were always cold.

With hesitancy, he inched closer, the space between you shrinking with each careful movement. The distance that had felt overwhelming moments ago now seemed trivial, as if the gravitational pull of shared warmth was irresistible. Miguel's arms encircled your body, a gentle cradle against the night's chill. His body heat became a lifeline, a silent promise to ward off the cold. Nuzzling his face into the curve of your neck, he couldn't help but marvel at the vulnerability of sleep and the unspoken connection that drew them closer.

You, amid a dream, sighed with the blissful surrender of someone finding solace. As Miguel held you close, your shivers ceased, replaced by a quiet tranquility. The once-distinct boundary between them dissolved into the shared warmth of the moment. In the hushed stillness, you emitted a soft, contented snore, a sound that resonated with an endearing charm. Miguel couldn't help but smile, finding the delicate symphony of her sleep both heartwarming and irresistibly cute.

Cuddling in bed wasn’t a part of the plan but you weren’t complaining. Your sweet scent invaded Miguel's senses. You smelled just as good as the cookies you had baked. Your skin was as soft as the velvety stockings you had hanging over your fireplace. He could stay like this forever. He never made wishes but he hoped and prayed that Medusa would come to him and turn him to stone so that he would never be able to let you go. He let fatigue carry him to dreamland, your snores acting as a fleeting melody in the silent serenade of the night.

Next... Pt.5

taglist:

@iite-cool@jewelz-teehe@br0-please@amber-content@thesilenthill@d1lf-loverrr@corpsebridenightamare@laysmt@bitchystrawberrystudent

[not-5-rats]

Okay so...this started as a sorta stable idea but then I started rambling and it ehhh...it went somewhere? Idk, this probs makes like zero sense but just go with it alright bestie????

Do you guys think Sugarboo ever used work as an excuse to distance themself from Al when Seth came back?

Like they knew the two were finally getting to know one another again, finally rebuilding a trust that was shattered years ago and they didn't wanna get in the way of that. So they threw thenself into their work...to distract themself, to remove themself

And for a while this worked out alright, Seth and Al had some space to talk abt...things and SB was able to work on getting their business of the ground...but they quickly ran into an issue. Burn out.

It had all happened so quickly, one day everything was fine, business was great, they were spending every moment of everyday in their own little space, baking anything their mind could think of at that moment and everything they made instantly sold out....but suddenly they could barely lift a spoon, everything was too much, too much demand, not enough supply. They were so stressed that they could barely roll out of bed some days.

They tried to just 'push past' this, thinking they were simply a bit tired, they just needed to keep going and things would be okay. Things were not okay. They worked themself into the ground, and people were beginning to notice, they were starting to notice

Al had started thinking something might be off when be realised it had been like...3 while days and he hadn't seen Boo at all. He mentioned it briefly to Seth which...didn't help. Bro knew this had something to do with him, and he was honestly silently freaking. Both of them tried to ask SB abt it, multiple times, yet neither of them received anything more than a vague 'answer'. They each had their suspicions but everything came out one day when they decided to check on SB after their work

They knocked on the door to no response, they knocked again and even called out to them but still no sign of life from within the house. At this point they were worried so they cautiously pried open the door and went inside. They couldn't find SB at first but they pretty soon found them, crying their eyes out on their bathroom floor. Al rushed to offer comfort, to ensure they were alright but Seth seemed to hesitate by the bathroom door, deciding it best for him to back up a bit

They asked SB what was going on, what had happened...but they couldn't answer. They were shaking, roughly, and were barely able to keep their eyes open due to exhaustion. Al had his hands on their shoulders trying to keep them conscious but they couldn't look at him. As they kept asking SB finally made an attempt to answer, through shaky breaths and messy sobs they murmered out something along the lines of -

"Sorry...I didn't...you guys finally...finally seemed happy...together...I didn't...I didn't wanna get in your way...I tried to work...but there's so much to do...and everyone wants different things...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry.."

Their voice trailed off as their gaze shifted slightly, first they looked up at the pink-haired one knelt infeont of them, they felt ashamed...they felt pathetic. But then they looked across the room to the brunette stood in the doorway...and they felt even worse. They failed, they had tried so hard not to get in the way...and now? Now all the attention was on them, they were stuck in the middle of everyone. They had failed...like always

Al tried to comfort them, tried to make them see that they weren't bothering anyone, they weren't in the way of anything and they had nothing, I repeat, NOTHING to be sorry for...but they couldn't hear him. Their head was foggy, their vision began to go and pretty soon...they went limp...turns out when you dont take care of yourself properly there are harsh consequences on your physical health

They passed out. That was all they remembered the next day, they had woken up to a concerned face watching them from the edge of their bed. Al noticed the second they were awake

"Boo! Holy shit what was that! What are you playing at? You really scared us there!"

He tried to calm down, he wasn't mad he was just scared, scared for the health of the one he loved. SB didn't say much, they were still so tired...and their head hurt, like they'd been hit by a truck. After a while Seth appeared with water, painkillers and toast. They made sure SB drank/ ate smth...they needed it and tried to get then to talk about what was going on. It took a few hours...but they finally explained why they'd been gone so much, why they were so busy...how they ended up like this

The two were...well...they felt like shit for their own reasons. Al felt awful cause he hadn't noticed, he had let all of this happen without doing anything to stop it. He'd been so caught in in Seth being back and what that meant for them that he had lost sight of the rest of his life. Seth...Seth knew this was his fault, he came back and now everything was falling apart, he was a curse, a plague, a danger to those around him...this was his fault

The three sat in silence for a while, broken by SB who somehow had a sense the other two were already casting blame onto themselves

"I'm sorry..."

Both tried to cut them off, but they continued

"! I don't want you guys using this to beat yourselves, it wasn't your fault, I...I should've spoken to you...I should've...been honest with you guys-"

"Sugar...stop it"

There was a slight argument, but it quickly slowed to everyone just being upset and apologetic. They all sat on SBs bed, making sure to give SB enough space to themself, and they spoke about what the next step was to ensure thay everyone was happy, and that everyone was alright.

It was a tough conversation, SB didn't want to accept help, they didn't want to admit that they needed it, Seth was tempted to just...leave town again, and Al was barely keeping himself together atp. In the end they worked it out...sorta. Things were still a bit rocky...but they'd made progress. They decided SB really shouldn't be on their own much right now, so they agreed to spend most of the daytime outside with Al and Seth, sometimes just with one but most of the time the three were all together (to stop anybody from getting stupid ideas), they all agreed to be more open...as open as they could be right now. There were still things each of them didn't wish to disclose and that was alright! They just had to make sure everyone was open about how they felt...about this situation, it would be hard...they all knew this...but they cared abt each other...they wanted to be around one another, and they knew this was how to maintain that....so they agreed and stuck to that plan

By the time the conversation was done SB was cuddled against Al and their eyes were already fluttering shut once more. He smiled down at them and they smiled back...they felt...better. They still felt weird, and tired...and sore. But things felt easier, not much...but slightly. Like their was a pastel filter over all their problems, sure they were still there....but they weren't as bad anymore. With that comforting thought they fell asleep...finally getting the rest they needed

End of this...ehm...ramble? Idk bros it's 1am

[buckyarchives]

metal arms and short skirts | bucky barnes. [3.]

summary: waltzing in as the new head of the Avenger's medical division, impressing everyone, and... scaring Bucky with your incredibly short skirts. while bucky's having a hard time looking at his arm as anything other than a deadly weapon, you're more than happy to help him.

word count: 4.9k

a/n : i started this with an upload schedule but it went completely out the window, oops. and i’m taking request for bucky onshots rn. not beta’d/brief proof reading

outfit reference here

story playlist here

read on AO3 | masterlist

Bucky woke up the next morning happier than usual, more excited to start the day, just wanting to see you. Even if it was just a moment in the hallways while you busied yourself with work. A part of himself was relieved at the fact he didn't have to purposely injure himself just to see you, Natasha was starting to get suspicious when he took hits or pulled punches.

As he woke up, Bucky planned it all out. Sam was going to come by soon to go on a run, then Bucky would take a shower (he also decided midst his sleep he needs to make himself more pretty for you), grab some food and coffee and drop by the lab.

Enduring all the teasing by Sam towards Bucky while making laps around the compound, they both easily made it around the new recruits. Shower, done. Bucky thought about you the entire time, not in a creepy way, it was endearing. He took a much-needed walk through the city nearby; you can only spend so much time in the compound without feeling suffocated, and found some hipster coffee shop that reminded him of you. Bucky thought about taking you on another date, hopefully soon. Grabbed some pumpkin bread and a coffee that he totally didn't have to ask Natasha about. Back in the 40s, bucky can't remember coffee being made any other way than just– one way.

Bucky walked back into the compound with a little skip in his step, which didn't go unnoticed by the others. It wasn’t every day that the infamous winter soldier didn't trudge around the compound - scowl permanently on his face.

The familiar head of hair showed behind the panels of glass, vaguely showing into your lab. Bucky's steps falter slightly as he observes you at work, so focused and concentrated on whatever task was in front of you. Bucky admired your intelligence and confidence far more than he had expected. You had practically swept him off his feet with it.

Trying not to startle or disturb you, Bucky slowly slid the door open, balancing your coffee and food in hand. You were balancing on a small stool as you reached for some hidden files at the very top of a bookcase.

Bucky opened his mouth to greet you, and just as the first syllable came out. You let out a high-pitched yelp and flinched back, the files dropping from your hand and falling all over the floor. Bucky watched as your chunky heel caught on the stool, losing your footing and now free falling. But bucky was quicker, he dropped everything and brought his arms out to catch you before you fell backward to the floor.

A metal arm wrapped around your upper waist and flesh hand steadying your legs on the ground, so they don't give out. You're perfectly placed hair now messy, and bucky looking down at you with wide eyes.

“Shit–” he breathed, “are you okay?”

You don't say anything at first, you are caught starstruck staring back up at bucky. A dazed smile grows to your ears. “I am now.”

Bucky can't bite back the giddy smile that grows on his face. “You should be more careful.”

“Why would I when I have a night in shining…” your bright eyes look down at the arm that wrapped around your body. “Metal watching over me?”

Bucky grows red at the acknowledgment of his arms that are still wrapped around you, and the closeness between your body and his. Only a few inches separate your lips, and bucky's eyes go wide from embarrassment.

“Oh, I'm sorry!” he panics, slowly letting go of you. You stand up straight now and gaze going straight at the large puddle of spilled coffee across the floor, next to the file you dropped.

“you, uh– dropped your coffee.” you point out.

“Christ, I'm so sorry.” bucky says, flustered to hell as he instantly goes for a roll of paper towels sitting on the table. God- he feels like such a mess. So much for the plan. “Fuck, really I’m sorry. I went all the way across town to get coffee for you, and I wanted to surprise you with it– fucking hell, I had to ask Nat what your order was, and then I just spill it, making a mess of your space. I’m such an idiot, I'm… I'm rambling, sorry.”

You looked stunned and dazed with towels in your hand, stopping when you began to listen to Bucky's rant. Slowly growing flustered. Bucky turns around, worry laced on his face as he waits for your reaction, expecting you to lecture him for making a mess. He feels so stupid–

“You got me coffee?” your mouth gapes open and bucky can't help but think you looked adorable standing in front of him.

Rising to his feet, a sheepish smile on his face as he goes faces you. “Yeah and, uh, bread. Pumpkin bread.”

“Is the bread okay?”

Bucky turns his head to where he stood only a few minutes ago, eyes landing on the bag. Bending to pick it up to see a perfectly good loaf, only a little smushed on the bottom. Bucky forces a smile as he hands them to you. “Still edible.”

“Thank you so much.” you beam up at him, quickly grabbing the bag. Quicker than Bucky can think, you close the distance between you and him, standing on your toes to give him a peck on his cheek. All happening so quickly that bucky got whiplash, blinking rapidly to himself as you walk past him to clean up the rest of the mess.

“Hey, no. I got it.” bucky objects, grabbing the towel from you. “It's my mess and you might get your outfit dirty.”

It's then when Bucky notices your outfit today, a baby blue dress that he can only think matches the shade of his eyes (whether it was intentional on your end or not: but it so was), strapless and fitting your body nicely. Stopping at your mid-thigh– which felt expected now, but bucky still grew a little flustered as his eyes lingered. Your usual white goo goo boots, which had resulted in your fall.

“Thank you, bucky.” you smile, going to gather the files spread out on the floor.

It doesn't take long at all for Bucky to clean up the floor and follow you to one of the less crowded areas of the lab, you were almost messier than tony- almost. You’d pulled a chunk from the bread and offered him some, which bucky took gladly as you ate your own piece.

“So what brings you here besides spilling coffee and giving out bread?” you start, looking at bucky with the softest eyes ever. Successfully pulling at bucky's heartstrings and leaving him breathless.

“Maybe I just wanted to see you.” Bucky shrugs.

You smile sweetly, “then I'd say I'm glad, because I wanted to see you too.”

Bucky leans back from the edge of the table, biting the side of his cheek. “Well, I don't want to hold you up.” bucky silently motioned to the door, but your hand goes to him before he can move.

“Stay, I'm not busy.” you smile.

Bucky blinks once, twice before he leans back in. “okay. You sure?”

You bit the bottom of your lip and nodded, a giddy smile on your face. Bucky can't seem to grasp how he could have made you smile like that, so beautiful.

“Last night was fun.” you start, gaze not leaving bucky.

Bucky nods in agreement, not noticing the way you stepped a few inches closer to him. “I'm glad.”

Your eyes flickered to bucky's lip and he swears he stopped breathing at that moment, his body moving closer to yours. A part of bucky doesn't understand how you could make him feel this way, how you can light a spark in him that he was so positive burnt out decades ago. Make his heart thumps so loudly you didn't need to be a super soldier to hear. How you could make him blush so easily and seemingly command his body closer to you.

Now bucky's eyes catch your lips, and your hand ghost above his waist. Faces only a few inches between them and bucky's senses are on overdrive as he can smell the vanilla and lavender on your body. Bucky closes the space between you two, slanting his lips on yours. Tasting the pumpkin spice as you kissed him.

A smile graces his lips as you lean into his touch, now snaking his arms around your waist. Your hands are brought up to his jaw and around his neck. Bucky is in a pure state of bliss and he’s sure his soul is ready to leave his body.

“Hey! No making out in the lab, especially with my best worker.” Tony's Starks shrill voice breaks the two of you apart, drowning in your own pools of embarrassment. A coldness washes over Bucky's body.

“Tony! Jesus Christ, what is it with people sneaking up on me today?” you think out loud, and collect yourself and stand up straight. “What brings you by?”

“You got a meeting with Dr. Pym at 4 and Helen is flying in at 7 to do some test of the new regeneration project.“ Tony hands a folder to you, a thick one with large, red letters spelling out ‘[Classified]’ on them. Tony's eyes catch bucky’s, a smirk rises to his face. “And Barnes, maybe ask your girlfriend about that thing tomorrow night.”

Your eye perks up and beam towards Bucky, Tony sending a quick wink toward Bucky as he continues down the hall. “What thing?” you ask him.

“This gala, it’s at the Stark tower on Saturday. Natasha says it's just PR for the most part, to talk to politicians and press mostly.'' Bucky starts, realizing what Tony meant now, starting to fidget with his fingers.

“Would you like to go with me? As a date?”

You blink once, twice, and stare in awe as bucky's nervously darts his eyes around the room, avoiding your gaze. “Really?”

“Yeah, if you're busy though-”

“Yes.” you smile brightly, leaving bucky breathless once again.

Bucky chews on his cheek, “really?”

“Yes.” you begin to close the gap again, “I’d be more than happy to go with you.”

Bucky starts to realize how much control he lacks around you, the constant feeling in his heart that tugs him towards you. He feels lighter; yet more nervous around you. Your eyes follow him, and bucky’s tongue swipes across his lips for a quick moment. Close enough to feel his breath again.

“Can I kiss you again?'' Bucky asks, almost breathless.

Your lip quirks up into a small smirk, playfully narrowing your eyes in his direction. Your chin raises up high to reach him. “Hmm, can you? Don't you have somewhere to be, sergeant?”

Bucky's heart flutters at the use of his rank, the way your voice sounds smooth as honey when you teased him. A part of him wants to just take you now, in the middle of your lab, with the risk of anyone walking.

“I don't know, do I?” bucky plays dumb, attempting to match your playful tone.

You lean in close and give bucky a quick peck on his lips, far too short for bucky to be satisfied. Maybe even lighting a bigger flame in his stomach, aching for more of you. “Maybe a mission?”

Bucky groans, his head falling limp and his long, brunette hair falling in his face. “Don't remind me.”

“Come on.” you smack your lips, wrapping your hands around his face as you push his head back upright. Revealing a dopey smile, warmth courses through bucky at your touch. His worries simply melt away: as if it's that easy. Your thumb lightly caressed his cheek. “I’m sure Steve is looking for you, go kicks some Hydra agent's ass so you can come back and we can dance at a fancy gala.”

“You make it sound so easy, doll.” bucky sighs, his mouth pouts as he leans into your touch.

You pull his face in, kissing him once again. With a sweet and innocent kiss, bucky's hand raises to ghost over your waist before you pull back. “Go be a hero for me.”

Bucky wants to protest, but you are already playfully pushing him near the exit of your lab. A grin is painted on both of your faces, and bucky's gaze is dripping with adoration for you.

“No, I want to stay.” bucky wines, lingering at your door. “Don't get rid of me.”

“Get back safe for me, yeah?” you spoke.

Buckys exhales, studying your face for a moment. Memorizing your features, almost as if he'd forget. A smile grows as he pecks your lips once more. “Fine, get rid of me.”

“Tell the other I said ‘have a safe mission’” you say, as bucky steps out of the lab. Giving you one more sweet smile.

“Will do!” bucky shouts, just as you leave his sight and head back into your lab.

Once the sliding glass doors close and you have a moment to yourself, your hand clutches your heart. Feeling it pound rapidly against your chest, your face feels warm. Bucky's touch lingers on your waist and lips, already missing him.

******

Dust filled bucky's lungs as his eyes began to flutter open, coughing roughly as he regained his consciousness. A sharp pain shot through his entire body, and bucky tried to flip to his side but he couldn't seem to move. Bucky’s eyes scan the area, and black spots filled his vision, but he could see the remains of the hydra facility everywhere.

Only a few moments ago, bucky stood close to Steve and Sam as they searched through the supposedly abandoned facility. But their intel was either wrong or the mission was compromised because a group of a dozen agents crashed through one of the doors.

Ending up in a fight, separating the three, and just as bucky had one of the last agents pinned down by the throat, he pulled out a beeping device. In red digital letter counted down to zero. Before Bucky couldn’t yell out to take cover, everything went up in flames with a ground rattling boom. Bucky must have hit his head and fallen unconscious for a moment, only now waking back up.

Bucky attempted to get up again, but his left arm wouldn't budge. Between heavy pants, his gaze fell down to his arm. The sharp pain coursing through his body came from the nerve endings from his still human shoulder being pushed up against his metal arm, being crushed from the biceps to his hand. Stuck under a huge slab of concrete.

Trying to pull it out of the rouble, flinching as he feels the metal connecting to his shoulder strain. His shoulder muscles feel like their being torn apart at every single flinch or small movement. A strained groan escaped his lip, attempting to push the concrete away with his right, but it was too heavy.

Bucky hears the faint sound of dragged footsteps, the dust still swarming through the air. Only seeing a figure dressed in black slowly get up from the crash. Bucky narrows his eyes to try and make out who.

“Sam?’ Bucky's voice is graveled and quiet. Followed by a choked cough.

The person did not respond or turn to bucky, bucky's vision starts coming back slowly. The man that stood across the room was not Sam or Steve. With a tentacle tattoo peeping from his collar, bucky's heart picked up, the man's gun cocked back and pointed down to the floor. Just above a passed-out sam, blood soaking his shirt.

Bucky's gun stood a few feet away from him, panic coursing through his body as he tried to reach for it. With his left hand stuck under the rubble, he couldn't move. Bucky braced himself, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to slide his arm out. He winched and cried through bared teeth as he pulled, and pulled. His shoulder felt like it was being torn apart, because– well, it was.

His hand touched the gun and with absolutely no hesitation, Bucky aimed at the Hydra agent's head and pulled the trigger. The man's body fell limp and hit the ground with a thud before he could set fire to Sam.

A heavy exhale left bucky's lips, relief coursed through his body knowing Sam wasn't in immediate danger at the hands of the agents. Bucky's head turned back towards his arm, his breath hitched at the sight. His metal arm was torn in half, severed wires spark at his biceps where it was torn.

Bucky's breath picked up and his chest heaved, anxiety coursing through his body as flashbacks from the alps came crashing in. blood and nazis standing above him as they found him barely alive, the cold snow soaking through his uniform as they dragged him through the canyon.

Black spotted his vision again as he tried to gather to his feet, he needed to check on Sam, he’s bleeding– Steve, wheres Steve? Are all the agents dead? Bucky's chest felt heavy, and his head lulled around as he grew dizzy. Fuck– his shoulder hurts like hell. Where is his comms? Are they damaged? Did agent hill hear the place blow? Is someone coming? Get up, Barnes!

Bucky choked on his own thoughts, his knees giving out before he couldn't even stand fully. He hit the ground, and everything went black.

*****

“So you and bucky? How'd the date go?” you could hear Natasha smirk from behind your back. She sat on a counter of your lab, hanging around just as Helen arrived.

“Did you melt the poor old man's heart?” Clint added, who also followed Natasha in here and decided to hang around. You enjoyed the company as you worked.

You smiled ear to ear to yourself, flipping through your files on some Stark tech you were assigned to look at. Trying to bite back the grin as you turned to face the two, a poor job as well considering Clint didn't miss a beat at teasing you.

“It was good, better than I expected,” you spoke. “He asked me to the gala tomorrow night.”

“You're welcome,” Natasha smirked, bringing a bottle of water to her mouth.

“I can’t believe you're actually taking time aside to date, you've never batted an eye towards romance while working before,” Helen adds.

“Well, it's a lot easier when he's at your work.”

Clint opened his mouth to say something, probably some teasing comment. But it was abruptly cut off by the loud shouts and cries of your name down the hall. Everyone in the room perked their head up, Natasha was quick on her feet to crane her neck out into the hallway.

A gasp escaped Natasha's lips as her gaze fell on whoever was yelling, instantly rushing out of the lab. You dropped everything as another cry for your help echoed through the compound.

Into the hallway stood Steve, holding onto a half-conscious Sam with a trail of blood in his wake. Close behind stood a grimey bucky, down an arm and in obvious pain.

“Shit!” you gasped, turning to Helen. “Sam's critical, get out a stretcher and an IV.”

You rush down the hall, your heel echoing as you stop to pull Sam over your shoulder. Examining the wound as best you can as you help Steve drag him toward the lab. It looks to be a large gash on his right side, and an exit wound. Which was a good thing considering what could have been.

“I need to get him steady and into surgery asap!” you shout down the hall toward Helen, “what the hell happened?”

“Ambush, they blew the building before we could even think to take cover. I think Sam fell on some metal rod.” Steve spoke through heavy pants.

“He’ll be okay, he’ll be okay.” you repeat, almost as if you're speaking to yourself. Steve helping you lay Sam over the stretcher as they wheel him off into the surgery room. you leave him in Helen's hands as she and Steve follow him. You fall back and turn to bucky with worry laced in your features.

“Holy shit, bucky.” you gasp at the sight, blood soaked his clothes; unsure if it belonged to him or not. Grime and dirt painted his skin, and his arm was gone. Wires severed and sparked as the metal panels were crushed and cut into sharp edges.

“I’m okay, doll. It's not as bad as it lo-”

Bucky can barely finish his sentence before you're aggressively grabbing at him and shoving him into the lab. “Are you hurt? What happened– holy shit, are you okay?” you rattled out faster than you could think. Eyes frantically checking over bucky as your hand's ghost over his body.

“My shoulder feels like it's on fire, but i'm okay.” he looks down at the blood-soaking pants, bucky sighs. “none of this blood is mine.”

“Get on the table, please. Let me look at you– fuck, are you sure you’re okay?” your practically push him onto a bench, already tearing at his jacket to take a look at your shoulder. Bucky can't help but think under different circumstances he'd enjoy this. Ripping off the fabric and seeing the scars around the metal, all raw and distressed from the pulling.

Bucky winced when your hand grazed above the scars, you instantly recoiled with a slew of apologies. Your gaze lands on the severed arm and crushed metal.

“I'm gonna have to reconstruct an entirely new arm, there's no way I can build off this. Especially since it's a foreign design.” you sigh, a small light clicks and you begin looking up into the wiring. Bucky listens intently, trying to ignore the sharp pain coursing through his shoulder and chest. “I'll need to get you into a chair and probably sedate you so we can remove the rest of it.”

Bucky flinches back from your touch, his breath hitches at your words. “What?”

Between the flashbacks and the mention of the chair, bucky is finding it too easy to fall back into that old mindset. Even the mention of the chair brings back the tingling feeling of electricity coursing through his brain just to break him down, only to attempt to build Bucky into something else. A monster.

You notice bucky’s change in demeanor, the way he curls into himself and closes off from you. You step back and away from his bubble to give him space. “I have to get this done soon, okay?”

Bucky is hesitant in his response, too distracted by the heavy breath as his panic sets in. the room feels too hot and suffocating. He notices the blood on your baby blue dress and bucky over the edge as he looks at you in horror, beginning to mix reality and flashbacks as memories of Hydra shake him to his core.

“Bucky? Talk to me, please. Breathe.” you speak softly, attempting to bring him down from his panic attack.

You crane your neck to meet his gaze, icy blue eyes brimming with tears. Slowly, you bring your hand up to graze against his cheek, giving bucky enough time to reject your touch. He doesn't, slowly bucky leans into it, chasing after your warmth and comfort. His breath starts to steady.

“Bucky?”

Bucky hums in response, “I’m sorry.”

“Please don't apologize.” you sigh. “I just need to get this fixed, and soon.”

Bucky hesitates, “I trust you.” is all he can manage to say.

You nod, making sure Bucky saw your movement. “I won't have anyone do anything to you that you're not comfortable with, yeah?” bucky nods, your hand planted on his shoulder and back; guiding him to an area to get him ready. “I’ll go get some anesthetics for you, make a few calls and we can get started. Just you and me.”

“Just you and me.” bucky repeats under his breath, following you with no hesitation now. His hands shook but his features were more at ease.

Bucky would be okay as long as it was you.

******

Many hours later watching over an unconscious bucky as you worked on totally getting rid of the hunk of metal, and having to reprogram the nerve endings to connect with an entirely new one. You had to rush to get a few messy doodles and designs that you'd done on your own time to be completed, as well as calling a few favors from the Wakandan research center and waiting for the shipment to come from the princess of Wakanda herself, who is also a close friend of yours. And conveniently owed you a few favors.

Helen and Tony offered their help more than enough times but you kept up Bucky's deal, despite how cramped and tired your hands got, just you and him. You had to respect that.

Sam was in surgery and already making good progress. a part of you thanked the timing for Helen being here because she is a far better surgeon than you, you were better with things made of metal or had programming, not human bodies. Sam would not be having as good a recovery under your hands. You were sure Natasha and Steve were doing their rounds to both Bucky and Sam, every 20-30 minutes one of the two would check in on the super soldier. Steve would linger longer with a sympathetic look casting over his face, you didn't mind the company.

Some small part of you grew relieved as you took away the red star from him, knowing his past and some of your own personal run-ins with Hydra. Feeling pride knowing you could give him an arm he'd feel less disgusted with, attempting to tend to his jarring scars that connected man to metal. But some were just too healed to do anything about it.

Bucky lay there for hours, a peaceful look as his features softened making him look a few decades younger. You wondered if this was the longest he’d slept peacefully in a while, no twitching of the eyebrow or jaw indicating a nightmare or waking. He looked happy, younger– your gaze lingered far too long a few times, Natasha having to snap you out of your stares with a snarky comment. Bucky began to resemble the boy in the photos hung around the Captain America exhibit.

Your fingers traced against the gold lines as you finished, feeling the sleek black vibranium against your skin. It was cold, yet to be warmed by bucky's body heat.

Grabbing a bottle of water that sat to the side, one Clint dropped off in the middle of a very intense moment in rewiring the arm to his nerves. Taking a few sips as you stretched your legs and began to clean your area, expecting bucky to wake soon. You'd be here when he woke up.

Until you looked down at yourself and realized you still wore the blue dress with Sam's blood stained all over it, some dripping down to your shoes. A frustrated groan escaped your lips, calling over Steve to watch over Bucky so you could change. Wondering why no one had half the mind to point it out.

You had a small locker reserved for you at the compound, you didn't use it much since you didn't live here. Only a few extra toiletries for overnight jobs and workout clothes, settling on grey sweats and a tight-fitting grey crop top, long sleeves, and an interesting cut-out around the neck and shoulder.

Your steps didn't echo like they would with your heels, slightly startling bucky at the sudden change when you walked into the room. Your eyes met him as he sat across from Steve, flexing and squeezing his vibranium hand. His head perked up once he noticed your presence, you smiled at him to ease any worries as he adjusted to the new arm.

Steve read the tension in the room, smacking his lips. “Well, I'll leave you two for a moment,” he said before slipping past you to leave the room.

“You feel okay?” you asked, instantly coming to Bucky's side.

Bucky looked down wide-eyed at the pitch-black vibranium, his mouth gaping open slightly as watched the panels move and adjust in amazement. “Yeah, different.”

“It should take a little to adjust to the feeling, I tried my best,” you responded quietly.

“Best?” Bucky's eyes met yours, “this is amazing, it looks like a piece of art– like it deserves to be in a museum and not me.”

Your cheeks warmed at the compliment, shying away from bucky. “It deserves to be on you, and I just made the design just for you. The Wakandas produced most of it– which by the way, they have legal ownership of your arm technically since it's vibranium.”

Bucky's eyebrow quirked up. “Is that something I should be worried about?”

“Oh! No, just don't piss them off or they might take it back.” you laughed, bucky smiling along.

“noted.”

“Okay, do the arm thing,” you said, your back sitting up straighter with an amused smile painted across your face. Bucky rolled his eyes and reluctantly did it.

“Anything new I should know about?”

You hummed, thinking for a moment. “Not that I know of, I didn't want to do anything without your permission. I’ll look over the files Shuri sent with it later, you can look them over too.”

“Okay.” bucky nodded, looking back toward his new arm. Running his right hand along the golden ridges on his palm. “It's beautiful really, thank you.”

“Anything for you,” you spoke, sinicerity in your eyes.

Bucky's heart warmed at your reply, trying to bite back his smile; but ultimately failing.

🎞️tag list : @matchat3a @sebsgirl71479 @heavenswrld @ivywasmaroon @nt-multi-fandom @michaelfuckinglangdon @fand0mskullfa1ry @lilliarussell @athenabarnes @almosttoopizza @genlovesdcb

[kairismess]

hii!! ok so like this is my first time requesting and I was hoping that you'd write a sugawara koshi with an artist s/o (can be fem or gn) and that they made a portrait for him as a Christmas gift!

idk what else to say, so, happy holidays!

⋆⁺₊❅⋆ holiday headcanons event !!

day 3: a drawing for mr. sugawara 🖌️

🍰 genre: fluff !! ✒️ word count: 533 💭 summary: giving your belove sugawara a portrait as a gift. 🖌️ 📣 thanks for requesting anon! if you'd like to request any other prompt for any other character, please refer to my holiday headcanons event and send me an ask!

you set your pencil down semi-anxiously, chewing on your lower lip in anticipation for your darling boyfriend to come home. he always offered to tutor his students every after school, and he also always offered to help the other teachers with their workloads, even during the busiest times of the month, when everyone else was supposed to be enjoying the beginning of their winter break and spending time with their loved ones.

you knew you could never truly hold a candle to the service and kindness sugawara had to give everybody he loved, including you, but your hands and heart were much more skilled in the field of arts; specifically drawing, and you hoped that by this self portrait of his that you poured all your free time and boundless effort to, he'd find some joy in it, some appreciation that was a mere semblance of what you truly wanted to thank him for.

when the front door opened, you immediately rushed down the stairs, your hands behind your back, carrying the portrait behind your back. sugawara took off his brown loafers and undid his scarf, hanging it up on the coat rack, exhaustedly smiling at you. his eyes still shone with love, even if he didn't say anything or didn't have the energy tonight to shower you with love like he usually does... you could tell, he was more than happy to be in the presence of you, his lover.

"how are you, dear?" he asked you in a gentle voice, walking over to you, kissing your forehead gently. you felt your whole face warm up, and you stammered out that you had a gift for him. shyly handing him the portrait you drew of him, sugawara grinned wider, his cheeks getting pinker by the minute. he thanked you, and gently took it from your hands that were covered in pencil lead and a variety of shades and colors.

seeing the portrait, sugawara couldn't help but smile even more. he always did have the prettiest smile, you really wanted to capture that sweetness in your portrait. "honey..." sugawara murmured, admiring the portrait and looking into your bashful eyes. he chuckled and kissed your nose, wrapping his arms around you as he clutched the beautiful portrait you made of him in his hands. "you made me look really wonderful... thank you," "you're always wonderful, koushi," you corrected him, smiling yourself, hugging him back hesitantly.

"sorry, th-the lead..." "it doesn't matter, darling, i love every part of you, no matter how messy you think you are; it's beautiful how creative you can be, love," sugawara mutters, kissing the side of your head in complete and utter adoration and gratefulness to you for your lovely gift. the snowflakes fell outside as you and sugawara embraced, warming each other up as the landscape outside became blanketed in fluffy white snow, with the inside of your home glowing and effervescent orange and red, the warmth of each other's touch and body heat sufficing for the little while you two held each other so intimately.

it was the perfect way to relax and let the holiday spirit be felt within sugawara, he couldn't ask for anything more perfect.

[gyusimp]

°•Cry•°

Warnings: No smut today, lol just a bit angst sorry. I've been feeling like Gyutaro lately and today I felt like crying in the office so I better take the opportunity to vent and write a bit.

▪︎Song Inspo: "Cry" - Cigarettes After Sex (i love them so much, pls listen to their music 🤧)

He was better than him, or so Gyutaro thought of his best friend.

Best friend? Since when did he think of him like that? He was quite a close acquaintance, because for Gyutaro friends don't exist.

He sees himself and him thinking that they are complete opposites, so why do they get along so well? And they get along so well why couldn't Gyutaro help but be envious of him from time to time?

Douma was a handsome young man, posting pictures of himself everywhere he went to his hundreds of Instagram followers. His skin was smooth, pale and flawless without any blemishes, his toned body and height would make anyone who looked at him drool, his features well proportioned and even his style of clothing was similar to that of a k-dramas idols or models, dammit.

He had a lot of friends not only in college but also from his old school where he finished high school, all the girls were texting him and would be willing to line up behind him at least to get a closer look.

He loved going out on weekends for walks and raising all the looks he could to feel desired and be the center of attention wherever he went.

Douma wanted a girl? He could have her.

But Gyutaro, oh, poor Gyutaro...he was Gyutaro. Always with the same expression on his face of having smelled shit even if he really felt happy, his laugh was totally outrageous and his shaky and weak voice matched it.

He had a nice skin tone and beautiful blue eyes but these were surrounded by dark circles due to the exhaustion of working all day and being a university student in his free time, the skin of various parts of his body including his face were dotted with peculiar birthmarks, a few scars and little spots caused by the stupid shitty acne he had been fighting for years.

He made an effort to dress well but being too tall he couldn't even find pants that fit him correctly, being tall was not part of his insecurities but being someone that big intimidated other people making them move away from him even when he weren't did it on purpose.

His hair was styled the same way every day, if he tried to do something different with it it was hard to like it and he'd rather opt to tie up his messy curls the same way again. Gyutaro hated his hair.

He had no friends, sometimes he used to talk with Hakuji and Michikatsu in college besides Douma but apart from them he had no one else to talk to. He hated people and his asocial tendencies made it almost impossible for him to want to leave his house when the 3 boys asked him out on a weekend. He had better things to do, like resting at least 1 fucking day a week and spending time with the only person he really cared about in life, his little sister Ume.

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

"Did you see her? I think it's her, right?"

Gyutaro looked up from his food towards one of the campus gardens, looking at the girl the blonde was referring to.

"It's her. Bro, do you really like her and can't recognize her yet?"

"It's nerves, I suppose." Douma said, laughing ruefully.

It had been several months since Douma had set his colorful eyes on a girl from college, no idea who it could be because she wasn't in the same class as them so that made things a bit more difficult for Douma to start his goal of getting to know her better. He didn't even know her name.

Gyutaro tried to help and advise his friend in what he could, he had never had a girlfriend before but for some reason he was good at romantic issues, although not when he had to apply them himself.

Recently, a girl at work had made Gyutaro's heart race every time he talked to her. She was too nice to him and they had a common taste for topics of conversation. It is not common for Gyutaro to feel romantically attracted to someone, it had been 4 years since his last disappointment in love so this time he was more mature and thought he would dare to open up more and maybe get to know this adorable and special girl more.

They were small steps but Gyutaro was determined and motivated by his co-workers, he would start by greeting her in a friendly manner, talking with her in free time and even bringing her some sweets or snacks to her desk making her smile and thank him tenderly, making his chest puff up proudly every time they were together... but not everything was rosy.

An idiot was behind her too. He had a girlfriend but he was still after every woman in the office that he could get for himself within the company, 7 years older than her and unattractive but still...she seemed to send all the little but sincere efforts from Gyutaro fucking down the drain. He was very disappointed, again.

Gyutaro cannot forget how one day he came to work earlier than usual and found them laughing and talking as if they had known each other for years and when they saw him they simply went to another place to continue talking alone...as if he was trash.

That day he decided to give up but if only his heart could stop feeling things for her so easily. She preferred that bastard, it wasn't safe at all but seeing them eat lunch together every day, talking when they could and coming to work together would drive Gyutaro into the head without fail, making him feel bad. It wasn't the first time this happened to him, other girls he was interested in before also rejected him without a second thought. They all told him the same shit about "She's missing it, don't worry about her." "The right one will come" but when? How much longer was he going to have to keep waiting when he was getting further and further along in his adult life? Were they sure the problem wasn't him? Because he was convinced of that. Different interests in different people, different places and stages of his life... and he was always rejected.

Gyutaro had so much love to give behind that serious face and "unfeeling" armor, but no one cared to know what was beyond all that. It was frustrating.

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

Gyutaro worked on his computer on some university projects after work, he did it afterward before going to sleep to pay enough attention to his little sister when he got home and had dinner with her. It was almost 9:00 pm and several messages made his cell phone vibrate, he took it to turn on the screen and see the contact "Douma" who had sent him 5 messages. Gyutaro opened the app and everything was a summary of how his partner had gotten the number of the girl he liked at a college event, got her Instagram and following each other accompanied by some screenshots of the random topic conversations with the girl. This made Gyutaro happy for his friend though not entirely, maybe at first but a few days later it all became a bit annoying for him. Douma couldn't stop talking about this girl, how cute she was to him and all the things they both had in common, how she responded to his messages almost immediately, and how they complimented each other. Douma was just excited and he didn't do it with any bad intentions but Gyutaro couldn't help but feel that his college romance was being rubbed in his face while he had been sent to hell a couple of weeks ago.

Gyutaro didn't say any bad comments to his friend, he reserved all kinds of hurtful words because he really appreciated him but envy grew little by little inside him. Douma was smart and handsome, he had gotten the seemingly unattainable girl of his dreams in a matter of weeks even though the only thing they met to socialize with was campus 1 time a week, a year ago he didn't even know she existed and now maybe they would even end up dating or doing things together in college and this disappointed Gyutaro in himself.

Why couldn't he do that? Why didn't these things happen to him? Even Ume got a love confession a few days ago but he never got his turn at anything...he was sick of this crap of feeling like he was "begging" people for some affection...he was fucking tired of the constant rejection .

If Douma did it with a complete stranger then why couldn't he achieve anything with the people he lived with and saw every day at school or work, with people who were even his friends, who took the fucking trouble to learn his name well and greet him every morning, with whom he had common themes and similar details in their life...why not him?

Shit, he was crying, again.

He didn't like to do it but he had to. Ume was asleep in her room so she couldn't hear his sobs in the dark, he sighed heavily and wiped a few tears from his face when his cell phone vibrated again. He scrolled down the notification panel only to find more messages from Douma and more screenshots of his conversations with the girl to tell him that everything was going well.

Gyutaro wasn't in the mood, not now. He tucked his cell phone under his pillow and snuggled under the covers as he was lulled to sleep by the rain outside. Maybe if he slept early today his head would stop aching and spinning in the morning, hoping to have a clearer and less stressful day than today.

[stonathandreamer]

Stonathan headcanons to brighten your day ✨

🔸 Masterlist

🔹 You can read part 2 here | part 3 here | part 4 here | part 5 here

Might've gotten a little carried away and turned this into a semi-fanfic, but I don't care!

--------------------------✨✨--------------------------

✨ They became good friends after S1 - Jonathan was just as surprised as you are. He never imagined becoming friends with Steve Harrington of all people;

✨ They spend a lot of time together - in between classes, during lunch, after school. As it turns out, Steve was actually a pleasant person (even funny at times, though Jonathan would never admit it), and Jonathan was such a good listener, even when Steve talked about things he didn't enjoy (like basketball). Jonathan always paid attention;

✨ There is no such thing as "Jonathan's personal space." Steve is always resting his arm over Jonathan's shoulders or bumping their arms whenever he says something he thinks is funny;

✨ Steve has the habit of sneaking up behind Jonathan to scare him. He finds it amusing. Jonathan finds it annoying;

✨ Steve would always try to convince Jonathan to go to a party with him!

— "C'mon, Jonathan! It's gonna be fun."

— "Forget it, Steve. I'm not going to some stupid party."

— "But I want you there! Pleaseee..."

✨ Steve always succeeded, after some bargaining, of course;

✨ Never leave each other's sides during these parties - because Steve was sure Jonathan would try to escape if he lost sight of him, and Jonathan because... Well, he didn't know anyone besides Steve;

✨ As time went on, Steve realized how much he enjoyed Jonathan's company: how he rolled his eyes and slightly smiled whenever Steve said something remotely funny (on rare occasions, Jonathan would even laugh), how he always listened to what he had to say, how he always showed Steve some cool pictures he took the other day. Jonathan is different. Jonathan is... Special;

✨ 'Oh shit. I like Jonathan?' he thinks one day;

✨ Steve fell first, but Jonathan... Poor Jonathan fell harder;

✨ He was sitting in his room listening to music while skimming through his newly taken pictures. One, in particular, catches his attention - it's a picture of Steve, atop a bench in the park, trying to strike a good pose and almost falling down. He looks fondly at the picture and smiles. Steve looks so cute in it... Wait;

✨ "No! No no no no no. SHIT!" poor guy has a breakdown after realizing he has fallen for his friend;

✨ They're both awkward with each other after their respective realizations sink in;

✨ Steve is no longer invading Jonathan's personal space, and Jonathan thinks he did something wrong, so now Steve is upset with him;

✨ Jonathan is no longer showing Steve his newly taken pictures, and Steve thinks he did something wrong. They rarely talk or spend time together, both fearful of doing something wrong and ruining their friendship. Steve eventually has enough of this and decides to take a risk. He goes to Jonathan's house and finds him in his room, looking like a mess - his hair is messy, and there are dark circles under his eyes. Jonathan almost has a heart attack when he sees Steve;

— "Did I do something wrong?" straight to the point, "Cause if I did, please tell me, Jonathan... I miss you."

— "N-no! No. You did nothing wrong. It's just... It's complicated."

✨ They open up about missing each other's company - how Steve missed hearing Jonathan's snarky remarks and how Jonathan missed hearing Steve's unfunny jokes. It's a sweet and tender moment. They're talking, laughing, invading each other's personal spaces, not even realizing they are getting closer and closer by the seconds;

✨ Steve slowly raises his hand and places it over Jonathan's cheek, eyes fixed on his lips. He makes his move and kisses him. It lasts for barely three seconds before Steve pulls back, eyes wide and full of fear, thinking he just ruined everything. Again! First with Nancy. Now with Jonathan!

— "I-I'm sorry!" he yells, getting up and making a run for the door, "I'll l-leave you alone!"

— "No! Wait!" Jonathan grabs his arm, "I don't... You..." he can't formulate a simple phrase. Since actions speak louder than words, he decides to act. Jonathan pulls Steve and kisses him.

✨ This time the kiss takes longer than a couple of seconds. It's just perfect, like they were meant for one another. Like it's destiny finally coming into fruition;

✨ And just like that, they're inseparable once again. Attached at the hip;

✨ Steve calls Jonathan 'Jon', or 'Johnny' when he wants to tease him;

✨ Jonathan calls Steve 'Steven' when he pretends to be mad at him;

✨ Jonathan knew his mom would be cool with him dating Steve (she already likes him), but he had no idea she would pretty much adopt his boyfriend! Always asking him to invite Steve over for dinner or lunch or coming up with ideas for their dates;

✨ Will asks Jonathan what he saw in Steve, and vice versa - and Jonathan is not sure if it's an honest question or he's just acting like a little shit. Nonetheless, Will is happy for both of them;

✨ Steve loves spending time with Jonathan and his family! He calls Will his 'brother-in-law', much to his and Jonathan's dismay and Joyce's amusement;

✨ Jonathan met Steve's parents once when he came to pick him up for a date, and of course, he introduced himself as 'Steve's friend'. They seemed... Ok-ish;

✨ Little notes always appear in Jonathan's locker. They're never signed, but he recognizes that handwriting from a mile away. It's always silly things like: 'Saw you today at the hallway. You're cute :-)' or 'Looking gorgeous today, gorgeous!'

✨ Jonathan wrote a little note for Steve once: "There are seven wonders in the world. There were originally eight, but I took one for myself: you." Steve has this note saved to this day;

✨ When he graduated from school, Steve employed the kids, primarily Will and Dustin, to deliver his notes to Jonathan;

✨ Jonathan was really happy for Steve when he got the job at Scoops Ahoy, and Steve was super proud of Jonathan for his internship at the Hawkins Post;

— "I look ridiculous in this stupid sailor outfit..."

— "Stop it! You look adorable, Steve." immediately blushes.

✨ New promotion at Scoops Ahoy: boyfriend gets free ice cream!

✨ Steve has a sheet of paper at the bottom of his drawer with only one phrase written on it: 'Harrington-Byers or Byers-Harrington?'

✨ Jonathan has a board filled with his favorite notes from Steve and some photos of the two of them together (and that silly photo of Steve almost falling off the park bench).

[oliveisme533]

My dad’s neighbor is a dilf

Chapter 3

Joel Miller x You

Summery: You had decided to spend your summer in Austin with your dad. You used to spend almost every summer there, but hadn't spent a summer there since you were a teenager. Which means you hadn't seen a certain Joel Miller in years..

It had been a week since you had accidentally hugged Joel Miller and sobbed into his chest. You had updated your dad on the phone call with your EX boyfriend, but you left out the part where Joel came to check on you and everything that followed. You were just hoping to get through the summer without anymore awkward encounters with your uncommonly hot neighbor. So when the next Friday rolled around and your dad told you that Joel had invited the two of you over for dinner... you had to think quick for an excuse to tell your dad why you would be sitting this one out. It was about 3 in the afternoon when your dad told you about this invitation, and you felt your insides turn to liquid. "Oh sounds great." You responded. It was now 5 o'clock and you decided you would go on a run and then after getting back just tell your dad you were too tired to go to Joel's tonight. It was a fool proof plan. Unfortunately you were so pleased with yourself and distracted that you didn't realize what part of the neighborhood your running path was taking you. You were coming up on Joel's house ... "fuck that's his truck he's definitely home." You kept your head down and kept jogging.

To your horror you saw Joel out of the corner of your eye. He was shirtless and mowing the lawn. He looked up from the mower, and catching sight of you he cracked a smile. You couldn't help but smiler and wave back. Gosh his smile was heavenly. "Hey girl! You better bring careful running in this heat" you slowed to a stop just a few yards from where he was standing. "I know... I grew up this heat though so I'll be alright." You said with one hand up shading the sun from your face. "I was just about to go in for some water myself can I get you some?" The southern girl in you knew better than to say no thank you. "Sure" you said. Joel motioned for you to follow him inside. Your heart was pounding. It had been years since you had been inside this house and certainly never on your own. Joel grabbed a t-shirt that was hanging off the back of his sofa. It looked like there was a pile of clean clothes on couch, waiting to be folded. "Sorry place is a little messy, I'll get it cleaned up before you and your dad come over." You didn't think it was messy. It just looked like a home that showed signs of life being lived. "Are you going to clean yourself up too?" You teased, taking the glass of water from him. Joel chuckled "definitely" you took a sip of water, feeling awkward. "Um so I just wanted to apologize about the other day" Joel waved his hand to silence you. "Hush, you ain't gotta do all that sweetheart" the nickname made your stomach do a flip. It was a good thing your cheeks were already pink from your run because you were pretty sure you were blushing pretty hard right now. Joel was kind however and changed the subject. "Figured I would pick up a desert for this evening...you got any requests'?" He was now busying himself in the kitchen putting his cup in the dishwasher. You finished your own water and placed your cup in the dishwasher. "Hmmmm Ice cream?" Joel smiled at you again "what kind you want sweetheart?" That southern drawl and those pet names were doing things to you. "Butter pecan" ...now you definitely weren't getting out of this dinner.

You thanked Joel for the water and walked back home. You went up stairs to take a shower and found yourself pondering what to wear. A cute summer dress perhaps? You stood in your closet with a towel wrapped around your damp body and your head cocked to one side as you eyed a particularly small dress. It was one of your favorites to wear in the Texas heat. However it was several years old at this point and you were a bit taller and your curves had filled out a bit more. You tried it on nonetheless. It still hung loose in all the right places so you resolved to wear it, even tho it was a bit short and it did show a little cleavage. "That's a pretty dress baby" your dad said as you descended the stairs. The air was still very warm but the sun was starting to set. At Joel's house your dad didn't really knock. He shouted a hello and let himself in the front door. Joel was already in the back yard manning the grill. "Heyy" he called, giving your dad a pat on the back. You found yourself wandering around Joel's back garden looking at the flowers. You were impressed with how well the beds were kept. Joel and your dad were laughing and chatting, each of the gripping a cold beer. You were so absorbed in admiring the flowers that you didn't notice the laughter had stopped, and you didn't even notice the slam of the back door as your dad retreated to the kitchen likely for more beer. "You can pick some if you want. Many as ya like" Joel's voice startled you. You were on your knees watching a bumblebee as he landed on a bud of lavender. "You scared me" you laughed. Joel smiled down at you and held out a large, tan hand. You took it and he effortlessly pulled you up from the ground. His eyes lingered on your chest for only a second. In fact you couldn't be sure if it really happened or you just dreamed it."Meant what I said... pretty girl like you should have all the pretty flowers in the world" with this he winked and walked back towards the grill. Your mind could just be playing trick on you OR the dress you wore was having the desired effect.

After dinner you decided to test your luck. You were in the kitchen helping Joel load the dishwasher and your dad had just walked out of the room with the trash. You bent down so as your short dress showed just a bit too much. Behind you Joel choked on the beer he had been nursing. You smiled to yourself, knowing Joel had seen your blue, lace panties. Playing dumb you stood up quickly "are you okay?" You asked innocently. Joel rubbed his chest "yeah yeah. Just down the wrong pipe that's all" ..."gosh it seems like forever since you've been here for the summer. Last time was when you graduated high school? Ain't that right?" You smiled, knowing he was trying to figure your age. "That's right" "how many years has that been now?" He asked nonchalantly. "You can ask how old I am... I won't be offended" you laughed. Joel held up both hands in surrender. "Who says I was asking that?" You rolled your eyes. " I'm 25, but you wouldn't know anything about that old man. What's it been 20 years since you been that young?" Joel pretended to pull a knife from his heart. Your dad had made his way back from the trash bins. "Your little girl is callin' me old" Joel complained. Your dad only shrugged. "you are old." The winds had picked up outside and the sky was now a deep gray. "Reckon she's gonna blow?" Joel asked, now sounding a bit more serious. Your dad crossed his arms over his chest and peered out the kitchen window. "Yeah... think she might. We ought to get home" it was peak tornado season and your dad wasn't one to take risks. That night you lay in bed with the howling winds and rain drops hitting your window with impressive force. There was a thought that you couldn't seem to push away. How old was Joel? Before you got too carried away with this fantasy it might be worth figuring out how significant this age gap really was. Then you remembered something. "I have his number..." you whispered to yourself in the dark. In middle school and high school you would come over and watch Sarah, naturally you had Joel's number as the person baby sitting his daughter. That was quite some time ago, what if he didn't have the same number. What's the worst that could happen? It's not like you're sending a particularly flirty text right? So he can't shoot you down if your asking an innocent question. You thumbed through your contacts in your phone and smiled to yourself as you found his name saved under Mr. Miller

You never answered my question about how old you are. I told you my age, so seems only fair...

You were impressed with how quickly your phone buzzed.

Girl what are you doin' textin me? Do you know what time it is?

Your heart was racing now. Was this his way of shutting you down?

I'm 37...now go to sleep

You smiled at your phone screen. That's not a shut down right? You decided you would go to sleep after all