#sorry for sad posting so much rn lmao.

[thegempage]

me in the first couple of months after moving, reassuring myself that things always get worse before they get better: hurting is the first step to healing!

me, a year and a month after the move, undeniably happier than i've been in over a decade and yet watching as each one of my maladaptive coping mechanisms falls apart in my hands, leaving me not only without any beneficial, long-term-appropriate coping mechanisms ready on-hand to replace them but also with the ever-growing sense that there is more wrong with me than i ever knew hiding underneath layers of masks and trauma responses: oh so i didn't know fuck or shit

[manasurge]

Ogod, my schedule for the next two weeks are such ASS. wtf… I’m going to be SO FREAKING TIRED and so freaking depressed. I hate it I hate it I hate it.

[starheirxero]

btw for the record if we have ever been in a situation where we had to stop being friends for whatever reason, i will still always hold you fondly in my heart. i will still think of every kind and small moment we had and i will miss you with every atom in my body. i will wait for you to come back and if you return, you will be no less of a friend to me than the day you left. i have no friendship decay

[skitskatdacat63]

I feel so fucking feral over any podium with ticker tape, THE PICTURES ARE SOOOOOO GOOD!!! And like...they shoot the ticker tape during the champagne...so it sticks to everything and everyone 🫠😵‍💫

[lleclercism]

it's not halloween but the ghost you dressed up as sure knows how to haunt 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[artficlly]

hi !! i love ur work <3

ok i had an idea for a one shot but it’s totally fine if u don’t want to do it!

so reader and bucky break up (bucky dumps her) bc he thinks she can do better or whatevs and instead of feeling sad, reader is kind of getting off to how bad bucky is doing without her 😜😜 this is obviously inspired by my kink is karma from chappell lmao. anyways ends in fluff or smut and a lot of how much bucky missed her 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️😛😛

thank uuu !!

BITTER [one-shot]

modern marvel au vet!bartender!bucky x reader Bucky doesn't do relationships, but maybe you'll be the one to change him

Warnings: 18+ content minors dni, fem reader, sexual themes, angst, hurt/comfort, major character death, ptsd, bucky barnes needs a hug, bucky barnes has issues, bar fights, alcohol, smoking, swearing, no use of y/n, lmk if i've missed anything

Word Count: 8.2k

A/N: heya nonnie. this isn't exactlyyy what you asked for but i hope you like it anyway. i'm technically on hiatus rn but i felt bad leaving your ask unanswered for so long. i've been working on this between classes, i'm not super happy with it but i thought i'd post it anyway, it got a bit longer than i was expecting. i have like 5 million things due at the end of the month so i might be gone for a bit so here is a treat in the meantime! much love! ! sorry for any typos - not proof read.

permanent taglist: @civilbucky @globetrotter28 (i swear there was someone else who wanted to be added, pls let me know if that was you i lost your comment)

main masterlist

The first thing Wanda had told you about Bucky Barnes was to beware. 

Proceed with caution.

You were the type to fall in love easily, it was one of the first things you had confessed to Wanda, wine-drunk only a week after moving into her dodgy shoebox of an apartment, where the previous tenant's mail still showed up—and so did their debt collector. You were new in the city, bright-eyed and overly romantic about all you encountered, including the suspicious stains on the carpet courtesy of Wanda’s old roommate, who she only referred to as ‘that nightmarish cunt’. Wanda was cool, chic yet edgy, her voice dripping a Slavic accent and always armed with a dangerous look in her eye. She worked downtown as a sous chef at one of those mid-tier restaurants that you considered fancy, but anyone even marginally higher than your pay grade wouldn’t look twice. 

Her boyfriend, Sam, worked at a bar across the road. Howling Commandos. He co-owned it with his buddy, the infamous Bucky Barnes. They had met while serving in the army, both retiring early from service. Sam was discharged after an injury that rendered him ‘useless’, and Bucky was discharged shortly after on grounds of mental health. 

And maybe that was the allure—the myth of Bucky Barnes. 

He was handsome, dark-haired, blue-eyed, the usual fairy-tale rom-com affair. He was brooding, damaged goods, and had a real chip on his shoulder since his discharge. He poured a good drink, kept the bar running smoothly, and was big enough to intimidate drunk frat boys who occasionally wandered in looking for a fight. But apparently, he didn’t do relationships. He would fuck anything that moved if it caught his fleeting attention for long enough, but that was it. 

Wanda had confessed it all to you on that dreaded wine-drunk night, hummus and carrot sticks forgotten as the TV blared Wanda’s Spotify playlist on loop. She’d had a friend, one who had moved away now, but that friend had slept with Bucky. Said it was the best lay of her life. 

So, Wanda had said, voice dipped as she gave you a drunken, sloppy grin over her Pinot Gris, the two bottles she had pinched from work now empty. If you want the night of your life, go for it, but don’t expect anything more. 

That was the rule with Bucky Barnes:

Don’t get attached. 

So, maybe foolishly, when Wanda had roused you from a hangover-induced nap the following day by asking if you wanted to join her at the Howling Commandos and continue your bender from the night before, you had taken the leap. 

–

Howling Commandos didn’t exactly roll out the welcome mat.

It had the look of a place that had seen one too many late nights and even more bad decisions. Exposed brick walls, low-hanging lights that shrouded the room in a dim orange glow, and a row of pool tables tucked in the back behind a collection of stained wood tables and chairs.  It was edgy, kind of dark and mysterious, much like the infamous bartender who now stood before you in the flesh. 

You and Wanda had descended upon the bar at half-past nine, arms linked, laughter spilling between you. You’d gelled quickly—your soft, unguarded friendliness balancing out her wicked smirks and razor-edged sarcasm.

She swung into a barstool with the ease of someone who belonged here, peeling off her winter coat and tossing it onto the counter, shaking the snow from her auburn hair. Across from her, Bucky barely spared her a glance, his mouth set in a line that could have been annoyance or indifference.

“Wanda.” His voice was low, unimpressed.

That was all he said. No hello, no warmth. Just her name, like it was something to be tolerated.

Wanda only grinned, leaning her elbows onto the bar like she had all the time in the world.

“Sam’s out back,” Bucky added, eyes flicking toward the door before sliding right past her, landing on you instead. “Still picking up strays, I see.”

You grinned before you could help yourself, slipping into the seat next to Wanda. As you shrugged off your coat, neatly sliding it into your lap, Wanda let out a mock-horrified gasp on your behalf. 

“So rude, this is my new roommate.” Wanda’s eyes slid over to you, head tilting as she gestured towards the scowling Bucky. “And this dickhead is Bucky. He’s co-owner with Sam.”

“I remember.” You replied with ease, your gaze and smile unwavering even as Bucky gave a noncommittal grunt, turning away to continue polishing the glass in his palm. 

Wanda, unbothered by his callousness, leant in. “I’m going to be honest, I need a drink ASAP. I’ve got an awful headache, and you know what I always say! Best way to beat a hangover? Drink even more.”

“Does Sam know you’re an alcoholic?” Bucky cut back, not even bothering to turn around. 

“Awwh, Buck, is that genuine care?”

“Not for you.” Bucky snipped.

Wanda made a mock pout face, fingers drumming across the bar. “But seriously, put me out of my misery here—”

“Your usual?” He cut over her.

Wanda didn’t skip a beat. 

“Pretty please,” she purred, her tone sweet and syrupy, dripping with exaggerated charm. As she settled more comfortably into the stool, her gaze flicked to you with a knowing gleam. “What do you want? On the house.”

Before you could respond, Sam’s voice rang out, thick with amused exasperation. “Baby, you can’t go offering drinks on the house to everyone—” He appeared from the back, a box of bottled spirits cradled in his arms,

“She’s my roommate—” Wanda began, but Sam cut her off, raising an eyebrow as he set the box down with a thud.

“Oh yeah? I haven’t forgotten the last one that you also insisted could have free drinks, and she turned out to be—”

“Don’t! Don’t bring up that cunt—”

You tuned out the conversation as Wanda slipped from her seat, weaving around the bar with the kind of effortless grace that came with knowing she belonged. She leaned into Sam’s space without hesitation, her laughter slipping through the low hum of the bar, threading between the murmur of voices and the scratchy tune spilling from the jukebox in the corner.

It wasn’t until Bucky slid a glass of dark liquor across the bar—precisely where Wanda had been sitting—that you finally tore your gaze away from them.

His eyes found yours, expectant, unmoving.

“It’s okay, I can pay,” you assured him, reaching for your wallet, but his unimpressed stare didn’t waver. His silence stretched, almost as if he were waiting for you to back down first.

You didn’t. “Gin and tonic.”

No acknowledgement, not even a nod. He simply turned, reaching for the bottle of gin without a word.

Wanda reappeared beside you, collapsing back into her seat with a dramatic sigh, a sound that quickly dissolved into a giggle as Sam pressed a quick kiss to her cheek on his way past. The small moment of affection made you smile, your gaze trailing after him as he made his way toward the pool tables. He moved with familiarity, exchanging greetings with the patrons, his presence met with easy grins and back pats.

“He’s cute,” you hummed, watching him settle into the space like he owned it.

“I know, right?” Wanda smirked, pulling her drink closer.

You propped an elbow on the bar, your curiosity piqued. “How’d you meet?”

She took a slow sip, savouring the taste before setting the glass down. It looked like rum and coke. Smelt like it too. “He used to come to my work all the time when they were fixing up this place. We just got to talking one day and—”

Bucky set your drink in front of you with the same quiet precision as before, cutting off Wanda’s sentence mid-thought. You turned your attention back to him, offering a bright smile that didn’t falter, even as he met it with a frown.

“I’ve never liked those,” Wanda barely spared him a glance, instead eyeing your drink with mild disdain. “Not sweet enough for me.”

“Well, I like my drinks how I like my men,” you replied, the words coming with a smirk that you directed toward Bucky, holding his gaze longer than you probably should have. “Bitter.”

—

Shivering in the back alley by the dumpsters probably wasn’t your brightest idea, but at this point, you were committed.

You and Wanda had knocked back one too many drinks—again. It was becoming a habit, one that Sam was starting to take personally, considering he was the one who had to cut Wanda off after she got a little too liberal with her chatting and nearly convinced a stranger to let her wear his coat home. You, on the other hand, had managed to slip out gracefully, settling your tab before Wanda was carted out back to be babysat and force-fed water.

Neither of them had been thrilled at the idea of you walking home alone. Buzzed, barely dressed for the weather, and just reckless enough to make poor decisions, you’d assured them you were fine. Which, technically, was true. What you had failed to mention was that you hadn’t actually made it more than a few feet out the door before deciding to truly test the limits of your dignity.

The cigarette hanging from your lips wobbled slightly as you tried—unsuccessfully—to light it with numb fingers. You swore under your breath, stuffing the useless lighter back into your pocket just as the back door of Howling Commandos swung open.

And as fate—or some cruel, all-seeing god—would have it, it wasn’t Sam or Wanda who stepped outside.

Bucky emerged, a black trash bag slung over one shoulder, his usual scowl fixed in place. His stride slowed slightly when he caught sight of you, his expression unreadable.

“Thought you went home,” he muttered. “Sam and Wanda already left. If you need a ride, I can call you a cab.”

You tilted your head, watching as he moved, efficient, mechanical. The back door groaned shut behind him, its echo swallowed by the muffled city noise beyond the alley. Dumpster lid up, bag tossed in, blue eyes flicking back to you, waiting.

“I don’t need a ride.”

His gaze swept over you, unimpressed. “Sure about that? You look outta your damn mind right now.”

You exhaled, breath clouding the frigid air as you shoved your hands deeper into your coat pockets. The wind bit through the alleyway, slithering beneath the fur-trimmed collar and creeping up your spine.

“Well, when I had this brilliant idea, I was still drunk,” you admitted, shifting your weight on unsteady legs. “Now that alcohol’s worn off and it’s cold as shit, I can’t even fuckin’ light a smoke ‘cause my hands are shaking so bad.”

You lifted your fingers to prove your point, stiff and trembling from the cold, flashing him a lazy grin. He did not look impressed.

“This a cry for help? I don’t know what it is with Wanda and picking up crazy fuckin’ roommates—”

“I wanted to get your number.” You shrugged, unbothered by the scepticism in his tone. “Didn’t want to do it in the bar, figured you’re a private kinda guy, don’t like putting your business out for the world. I can respect that.”

He blinked, once. Then, slowly, “So you thought the next best option was to wait in a back alley in the snow—?”

“Hey,” you cut him off with a laugh, shifting your weight against the wall. “I said I was drunk when I came up with it… never said it was a good plan.”

Something flickered across his expression. Dry amusement, maybe. Then, to your surprise, he huffed out a short laugh, his breath visible in the cold air curling between you.

You smirked. “C’mon, I’ve been out here for like… an hour. Least you can do is give me your number.”

He took his time looking you over, slow and assessing. Despite the heavy winter coat hanging off your shoulders, you were still grossly underdressed for the weather. The short, tight-fitting dress clung to you like a second skin, courtesy of Wanda’s slut-shaming is sooo 2016 speech. A poor choice in hindsight, considering the temperature was bordering on unbearable.

“I’ll do you one better.”

You arched a brow. “Yeah?”

His voice dipped lower, something rougher curling at the edges. “How about I lock up, and you sit your pretty little ass in my car? I’ll drive you back to mine.” A beat. “Sound good?”

Now, this was the Bucky Barnes Wanda had described—the dangerous one, the elusive ladykiller. The shift had been minuscule, yet you already found your panties were wet.

You smiled. “Well, now you’re talking my language.”

—

"We should stop seeing each other."

Bucky sat hunched on the edge of his bed, forearms braced against his knees, fingers laced tightly together as if he were holding himself back. He didn’t look at you. His jaw was set, his mouth a firm line, but that wasn’t what unsettled you—it was the tension in his shoulders, the restless bounce of his leg, the way he exhaled through his nose like he was already regretting this conversation.

That first night had been the spark, but the fire never quite burned out. It carried on in flickering embers, nights tangled in his sheets, the weight of him pressing you into the mattress, bodies moving in time with the city’s restless heartbeat. If you had to put a name to it, fuck buddies was the closest fit, though even that felt too familiar, too warm. There were no tender morning-afters, no texts outside of arranging the next meeting. You met him in the alley after closing and let him drive you back to his place. Though sometimes, you never made it that far. Sometimes, it was the backseat of his car, windows fogged, streetlights streaking across his skin as you clawed at his shoulders. Other times, it was rushed and desperate, your palms braced against crates in the storeroom, breath hitching between half-suppressed moans before either of you had the sense to lock the damn door.

But as winter thawed into spring, something shifted.

The first crack in the foundation came when Bucky, against all odds, accepted your half-hearted invite to grab a bite to eat. You’d won a cheap voucher for a hole-in-the-wall Mexican place around the corner from the bar, fully expecting him to wave you off. But he hadn’t. And somehow, the two of you had ended up crammed into a booth, sharing a pile of nachos, snickering into your drinks as you watched a group of college kids make absolute fools of themselves. You wouldn’t have called it a date—Bucky sure as hell didn’t—but something about it felt different. Easier. The way he’d nudged his plate toward you when he noticed you eyeing his last taco. The way he leaned just a little too close, voice dropping low in your ear, murmuring some dry remark that made you snort into your margarita.

You weren’t sure when the line blurred. Maybe it was when your not-date nights became just as routine as your hookups. Or maybe it was at Wanda’s birthday dinner when Bucky—without thinking, without hesitation—draped his arm across the back of your chair, fingers tracing slow, absentminded circles against the bare skin of your shoulder. You hadn’t even noticed at first, too caught up in conversation, but Wanda and Sam sure as hell had. They shared a look, one of those wordless exchanges, tight-lipped and knowing. Like they were bracing for the inevitable. Like they could already see the fallout creeping on the horizon.

And they were right.

Because after a year of effortless, reckless bliss, Bucky finally reached his limit.

You should’ve seen it coming. Should’ve known that letting Wanda rope you into planning his surprise birthday party was a mistake. That something so personal, so full of effort, would make him withdraw. It was all too much. Too close. Too intimate for someone who spent his life keeping people at arm’s length.

And just like that, the fire snuffed out.

Your grip tightened around the box in your hands, the crinkling of the wrapping paper comically loud in the quiet room. The laughter and chatter from the party outside felt like a world away, muffled through the walls of his bedroom. You had pulled him aside to give him his present in private, and now it sat between you like a hand grenade, pin already pulled, waiting for the explosion.

“Are you going to open your present? Hand-picked by yours truly, I made sure not to let Sam meddle with those prank gifts of his—” You ignored his words, shoving the brightly wrapped box towards him. He barely glanced at it before waving it off, his scowl deepening.

“Did you even hear what I said?” Bucky interrupted you, expression nowhere near impressed

“Jesus, Bucky. Are you serious?” The sigh that left you was excessive, the once bubbly and sweet aura you wrapped yourself up in so tightly melting away in an instant. 

You should have known.

He had been off all week. Distant, restless. He’d stopped waiting for you in the back alley after his shifts ended, ignored your texts, and let your calls go to voicemail. Hell, he hadn’t even invited you over to fuck in two weeks, and that was the foundation of whatever this was between you. You’d told yourself it was the late winter blues—snow had been falling thick for weeks now even with spring looming closer by the day. Maybe, you had told yourself, it was some kind of early mid-life crisis with his birthday looming.

But deep down, you’d known better. You’d felt it in the way he couldn’t meet your eyes anymore, how his touch had cooled from burning to indifferent. It was like a switch had flipped, turning lust into something close to disgust.

“I’m serious,” Bucky said, exhaling like the conversation had already exhausted him. He rubbed a hand down his face, eyes fixed somewhere past your shoulder as if looking at you would make this harder. Or maybe easier. “We should stop… whatever this is.”

The present now sat on the bed, abandoned between you. You placed it down with deliberate care, fingers smoothing over the edges as you mulled over his words. Beyond the walls, the party raged on, voices rising in drunken harmony as Sweet Caroline blared over the speakers. A chorus of shouts—touchin’ me, touchin’ you—mocked the silence stretching between you.

You knew there was no point in arguing, not when Bucky had already made up his mind, disillusioned or not. But the question still burned its way up your throat before you could stop it, raw and sharp as you met his gaze.

“Why?”

His brows furrowed. “Why?”

However he had expected you to react, this clearly wasn’t it. Maybe he thought you’d cry. Maybe he thought you’d yell. But you had never been the type for tears or begging. You just wanted the truth. The cold, ruthless reason why this wasn’t working anymore.

“Yes. Why? What’s changed?”

Bucky hesitated, something flickering across his face. Hesitation, regret, guilt, maybe all three. Then, his jaw tensed, and he forced the words out like they tasted bitter on his tongue.

“You’re… You’re just too much. You’re too much for me.”

Your head tilted slightly, observing him. He still wouldn’t meet your eye.

“Too much, huh?” You echoed, voice steady despite the way your stomach twisted. “And how exactly am I too much?”

He sighed, exasperated. “You’re just… overbearing. You always want to text or call, or stop by the bar. You’re always asking after me with Sam and Wanda. It’s all just a little too much, doll. This was supposed to be a casual thing.” His fingers flexed at his sides, his frustration palpable. “You’re just—”

“So, you’re punishing me because I care?”

“That’s not what I’m saying—”

“Then what are you saying, Bucky?” Your voice sharpened, and your patience unravelling. “That I’m clingy? That I’m suffocating you? Is it such a crime that I want to spend time with you—”

“You’re just—fuckin’ everywhere.” His voice rose, and you arched a brow, arms folding over your chest. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “I swear to God. Every thought I have, everything I do—you’re there. I dream about you. And sometimes, I swear I smell that goddamn perfume of yours even when you’re not around—”

“Bucky.” You took a step forward, searching his face for something, anything. “Have you ever considered that maybe this is happening because you like me? Not because I’m some overbearing burden in your life—”

His lips pressed into a thin line, his entire body stiff.

“I don’t do relationships.”

You let out a dry, humourless laugh, shaking your head. “So, what then? You’re just gonna cut me off? I got too close, didn’t I? Too close to you—to the real you, the one you hide under all that brooding, tough-guy bullshit—so now you’re pushing me away?”

Bucky’s jaw twitched, but he said nothing.

You exhaled sharply, your patience splintering under the weight of his silence. “You know, Wanda warned me this would happen. Sam too. Hell, just about everyone out there did.” You gestured vaguely toward the door, toward the muffled chaos of the party beyond his bedroom. Laughter and music seeped through the walls. “Your friends, your colleagues. They all warned me. Guess I’m the idiot for thinking it’d be different, huh?”

His gaze flickered. A barely-there flinch. You pressed on.

“They told me you throw people away when they get too attached.” Your voice softened, but not with kindness, with something hollow, something resigned. “Or worse, when you do.”

His breath hitched, so quick and so subtle that if you hadn’t been watching him so closely, you would’ve missed it. But you saw it: the crack, the hesitation, the battle waging behind those sharp blue eyes.

For a second, it almost looked like he might break. Like he might finally say what he was really thinking.

But then, just as quickly as it appeared, the moment was gone. His expression hardened, every ounce of warmth draining from his face.

“I don’t need you.”

And just like that, the last ember of hope inside you burned out.

You swallowed against the ache in your throat, but your voice came steady, unwavering. “Is that the truth?” you asked, tilting your head slightly. “Or are you just telling yourself that to feel better?”

His eyes darkened, and this time, there was no hesitation.

“Get out.”

—

You weren’t sure why you came back to the Howling Commandos.

You were beginning to suspect that Wanda and Sam were scheming something. She was constantly begging you to visit the bar every night off she had with the promise of free liquor. It had taken a few weeks after Bucky’s birthday meltdown for you to finally budge. Maybe it was the way Wanda had pulled you along, her arm hooked through yours like she could drag you away from the weight of it all. Maybe it was the way she made you laugh, tipping her head back, auburn hair catching in the bar’s dim light, her wicked look as she shrugged off her coat and flung it onto the counter. Maybe it was because you knew he would be here.

And, maybe, just maybe, you wanted that.

Bucky stood behind the bar, sleeves rolled to his forearms, jaw tight as he poured a whiskey neat without looking up. He must’ve heard you come in like he always did, but his eyes never once lifted from his work.

You perched upon one of the barstools beside Wanda, the wood sticky beneath your elbows, the orange glow from the bar’s lights catching in the condensation on your glass. A gin and tonic. No words exchanged, no request needed, just Bucky’s hand sliding it across the table without so much as a glance in your direction.

It was almost funny, the way he refused to look at you, wouldn’t acknowledge you beyond the ghost of a touch as his fingers brushed the glass. And yet, he still remembered your drink. Still took the time to slice a bit of lemon for the rim, just the way you liked it. Never mind that he’d once grumbled about how much he hated customers who ordered anything that meant extra cleanup at the end of the night.

“You gonna sulk all night or actually have fun?” Wanda teased, knocking her knee against yours.

You took a slow sip, letting the cool burn of gin settle on your tongue before answering. “I am having fun.”

“Sure you are,” she drawled, not buying it for a second.

But the night wasn’t all bad. You were feeling good, maybe a little too good, laughing at Sam’s exaggerated retelling of a story you’d already heard a dozen times, Wanda snorting into her rum, the buzz settling in like a second skin.

But the uneasy peace did not last long, as chaos had a way of following Bucky Barnes like his own shadow.

Two guys, a little too confident, a little too eager. You felt them before you even turned, whiskey on their breath, a practiced smirk tugging at the lips. The kind of men who smelled like cheap aftershave and overconfidence, sliding into your space with easy grins and empty compliments. One leaned in too close. “Didn’t think someone like you would be drinking alone.”

You arched a brow. “Who says I’m alone?”

He took the bait, smirking. “That right? Where’s your boyfriend, then?”

“Don’t have one.” You replied, tone disinterested.

He grasped your arm, and you yanked it away, nearly elbowing Wanda beside you in the process. “Oh yeah? I could change that for you sweetheart—” 

You didn’t have time to answer before you saw the bar flap shoot up in your peripherals. 

“Hey, man,” Sam warned, barely getting the words out before Bucky was there, a cloud at the edge of your vision, muscles wound tight beneath his shirt. He wasn’t looking at you, not really, but you could feel the storm rolling off him in waves, the tension singing through his frame.

The guy didn’t even have time to react before Bucky shoved him back—hard enough to knock him off balance, sending his drink sloshing onto the floor.

“The fuck?” Whiskey-breath scowled, stumbling forward like he thought he had a chance.

Bucky stepped in, jaw clenched, fist already curled like a promise. His voice was smooth, even. “Out. Now.”

The guy scoffed, straightening. “Oh yeah? What are you, the bouncer?”

“Nah.” Bucky tilted his head. “I fuckin’ own the place.”

Sam was rounding the bar, slipping beneath the bar flap. “One rule, Bucky! We have one rule!”

“No assholes in the bar?” Bucky deadpanned, flexing his fingers.

“No. No punching customers—hey!”

Too late.

The first punch landed with a sickening crack, sharp enough to slice through the low hum of conversation. A brief, stunned silence settled over the bar, glasses paused mid-air, a cue ball rolling to a stop on the felt. Then, a gasp. A sharp inhale. Someone let out a bark of laughter.

The guy staggered back, clutching his jaw, blinking like he couldn’t quite process what had just happened. But instead of learning his lesson, he surged forward, swinging blindly in a desperate attempt to save face.

The impact came from the right. A solid hit, knuckles cutting against Bucky’s brow. His head snapped slightly to the side, strands of dark hair falling loose from where they’d been tucked behind his ears. The second punch followed fast—less precise, more frantic—but it clipped him along the cheekbone, just enough to split the skin.

A thin trail of red welled up, tracking down the sharp line of his face.

Bucky stilled.

A slow, dangerous exhale. Then, before the guy could so much as blink, Bucky struck. A brutal, efficient one-two, fist slamming into ribs, then an upward cut that sent the man sprawling. His friend hesitated, torn between pride and self-preservation, before grabbing a fistful of his collar and dragging him toward the door.

Bucky flexed his fingers, shaking out his hand like he was testing for damage, like he barely felt it. The cut above his brow was bleeding, a slow trickle of crimson trailing towards his temple, but he didn’t seem to notice. Or care.

You took a sip of your drink, eyes flicking lazily towards him, your pulse not even kicking up. Beside you, Wanda didn’t so much as blink; she just swirled the last of her rum and coke, watching the scene unfold like it was a rerun of a show she’d seen too many times before.

Finally, with a knowing smirk, she leaned in, voice low and honey-smooth. “You’re getting off on this, aren’t you?”

You swirled your gin and tonic, ice clinking against the glass, lips curling around the rim as you took another sip.

“Maybe.”

—

The back room was cold, the kind of cold that settled deep in the bones, seeping through the exposed brick walls. A single bulb hung overhead, casting a dim, yellow glow over the stacked crates of liquor and the metal shelves lined with bottles. You’d been in here many times, though usually under much more pleasurable circumstances. Bucky sat on an overturned crate, elbows on his knees, blood drying along the ridge of his knuckles. His head was tipped slightly forward, shoulders hunched as he rolled one of his split knuckles between his fingers, like he was testing if it still hurt. 

You shut the door behind you.

His jaw tightened. “Don’t.”

You ignored him, stepping past the crates and grabbing the first aid kit off the nearest shelf. “Sit up straight.”

He didn’t move.

So, with a sigh, you pressed a firm hand to his shoulder and shoved him upright. He let it happen, though he shot you an unamused look as he exhaled sharply through his nose.

“Jesus, you’re pushy.”

You crouched in front of him, flipping open the first aid kit, the sharp scent of antiseptic filling the air. He watched as you poured alcohol onto a clean cloth, soaking it through before pressing it against the cut above his brow.

Bucky flinched, fingers twitching like he wanted to grab your wrist, to stop you. But he didn’t.

“Hold still,” you murmured, dabbing at the wound.

His lip curled slightly, but he stayed put, letting you clean the blood away. His fists clenched on his thighs, shoulders wound tight like he was waiting for something worse.

“You know,” you said, voice light despite the weight in the air, “I heard from Wanda you’ve been losing it lately.”

Bucky huffed. “Yeah?”

“She said you’ve been missing shifts, and when you do turn up, you’re, uh…” You smirked, twisting the cloth to clean the edge of his jaw. “Well, these are her words, not mine—a miserable old cunt. Keep picking fights with customers.” You paused, waiting to see his response. His lips remained sown shut, his gaze cold, and he did not quite meet your eye. With an arch of your brow, you continued.

“Apparently, someone broke into your car, and you’re getting kicked out of your apartment because your landlord wants to sell it to some construction assholes.” You tilted your head, studying him. “I mean, some of that isn’t your fault, but it sounds like karma to me.”

Bucky’s fingers flexed. “Why do you care, doll?”

“I don’t,” you said easily, wringing out the cloth before pressing it against his brow again. “It’s like… watching a car wreck. Kind of captivating in a way.”

He let out a short, humourless laugh. “You’re fucked up.”

“Yeah, maybe I am.” You shrugged, barely glancing at him as you grabbed another clean cloth. “But I think, deep down, maybe I just pity you.”

Bucky’s expression darkened. “Why are you so normal about all of this? Aren’t you the one that’s supposed to be, I don’t know, freaking out? I was the one who dropped you, not the other way around.”

You paused, the cloth still pressed to his skin. You considered his words, then slowly and calmly, you replied. “It’s your own heart that you’re breaking, baby.”

Bucky’s jaw tensed. “You don’t know that.”

“I think I do.”

His lips parted like he was about to argue, but instead, he exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “You don’t know shit about me.”

You sat back on your heels, observing him. The bruises were darkening across his cheekbones, his knuckles still raw, and his body shuddering from the aftermath. But beneath it all—under the cold defiance and the sharp edges—you saw it. The weight of something unspoken, something he wouldn’t admit to himself.

You hummed, tilting your head. “I know a lot.”

Bucky’s gaze flickered to you, wary.

“I know that you take your coffee black, your whiskey neat,” you said, voice soft. “That you always make your bed because it’s a habit from when you served. You prefer to drive stick. You’re a cat person.” 

You held his gaze, watching the way his fingers curled. “I know that you wear two sets of dog tags. That there are ghosts following you that you don’t talk about. I know that you realised you were getting attached to me. That it scared you so badly you dropped me the moment it clicked.”

“I know that you still ask after me,” you finished, your voice barely above a whisper. “I know that deep down, you care about me.”

Silence settled between you. 

Bucky stared at his hands, dried blood caking along the ridges of his knuckles. He was still for a long time, so long you thought maybe he wasn’t going to respond at all. 

“This… this thing between us.” His voice was rough. “It was a fling. Nothing more. A moment in time, not to be repeated.”

You inhaled slowly, disappointment evident, then stood.

With an easy motion, you tossed the bloodied rag onto a nearby crate.

“Keep telling yourself that,” you murmured, stepping back.

Bucky looked up at you, something flickering behind his eyes, but he didn’t speak. He didn’t have to.

You just smiled.

“Because I know,” you said simply, turning toward the door, “that in the end, you’ll come crawling back to me.”

“I won’t.”

You glanced over your shoulder, the corners of your lips curling.

“Okay.”

—

The cemetery was quiet, save for the whisper of wind through bare branches and the distant hum of traffic beyond the iron gates. The last bite of winter still clung to the air, spring struggling to take hold, leaving the sky an endless stretch of pale grey.

You pulled your coat tighter around yourself as you stepped out of Sam’s car, boots crunching against the gravel path. Wanda climbed out from the passenger side, rubbing her arms against the cold, while Sam exhaled sharply, tilting his head towards the small gathering of headstones up ahead.

“He’s already here,” he murmured.

Bucky stood with his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket, his back to you, his head slightly bowed toward the grave. Even from a distance, there was a tension in the way he held himself—like he was bracing for impact or maybe just trying to keep from unravelling.

You tightened your grip on the flowers in your hand and followed Sam and Wanda towards him.

Bucky didn’t turn when you approached, but you saw his shoulders shift, the slight tensing of his jaw when he realised there was one more person than expected. He still didn’t say anything, though, just kept his eyes on the headstone.

Steve Rogers.

The name was carved deep into the stone, clean and straightforward. No rank, no medals, no accolades. Just a name. A man who had meant something to them.

You hadn’t even known Steve existed until Sam mentioned him offhand a few days ago, his voice softer than usual, the usual humour dimmed. He hadn’t given many details—just that Steve was an old friend, someone he and Bucky had served with, and that the anniversary of his death was coming up. It hadn’t been an invitation, just a passing remark, but something about it stuck with you. Maybe it was the way Sam glanced at Bucky afterwards, concern hidden beneath his easygoing demeanour or the way Wanda’s expression darkened slightly like she’d been expecting it. You didn’t know anything about the man they were mourning, but you knew Bucky, and you knew the kind of grief that sat heavily on a person’s shoulders. Maybe you wanted to pay your respects. Perhaps you just wanted an excuse to get eyes on him, to see how bad the damage was. Either way, when Wanda and Sam left for the cemetery, you were in the car with them.

You stepped forward and crouched down, laying the flowers gently against the grave. The wind tugged at the petals as you stood, moving back beside Wanda, who sent you a glance but didn’t say a word.

Sam was the first to speak. “Damn, Steve. I hope you know we visit you even in the freezing fuckin’ cold.”

A small chuckle rumbled from Bucky’s chest, barely there. “Yeah.”

Sam exhaled, shaking his head. “You know, I think about that time in training when Bucky dared you to climb the roof of the barracks, and when you actually did it, Bucky nearly had a heart attack ‘cause you realised he’d have to go up there to get you down.”

Bucky huffed, shaking his head. “Idiot did a victory pose at the top. Almost fell straight off.”

Sam laughed. “Man, I wish we had taken a photo of you, dumbass.”

They fell into an easy rhythm, trading stories, some funny, some quiet and unspoken, shared only through small glances and nods. Wanda stood beside you, hands clasped in front of her, while you listened, letting them have their moment. She hadn’t known Steve either, just fragments of memories and stories Sam had told her over the years.

Eventually, the cold started to settle in deep, and Sam clapped his hands together. “Alright, I don’t know, but I think Steve would be personally offended if we froze our asses off standing here like idiots instead of heading home.”

Wanda nodded, already turning back toward the cars. You followed, but before you could take more than a few steps, Bucky spoke.

“I’ll take her home.”

The words were short, and clipped, but they made Wanda and Sam pause.

Sam lifted a brow, glancing between the two of you, then exchanged a look with Wanda, one of those unspoken conversations between lovers that didn’t need words.

But neither of them argued.

Sam just gave a small, knowing shrug and started toward his car. Wanda followed without a word, though you could’ve sworn the auburn gave you a subtle smirk.

You exhaled softly, then turned towards Bucky’s car.

The drive was quiet.

Outside, the world blurred past, fields and roads stretching under the grey sky. You kept your hands close to the vents, soaking in what little warmth the car offered, your fingers still stiff from the cold. Bucky’s grip on the wheel was tight, his knuckles pale. He was wound up, his shoulders rigid, and his jaw locked. The muscles in his forearms twitched as he shifted gears, and every so often, he exhaled sharply like he was biting back something sharp.

Minutes passed, the ghost of unspoken words swirling between you.

Then, suddenly—

“Fuck this.” Bucky muttered the words under his breath, his grip on the wheel tightening before he jerked the car off the highway. The tyres crunched over gravel as he turned onto a narrow backroad leading toward a small, empty picnic area near a river. The place was deserted, picnic tables dusted with half-melted frost. Too cold for anyone to be out.

You sat there, the hum of the engine the only sound between you. The sky outside had darkened, clouds pressing down low on the horizon as the river lazily wound its way through the mist. Bucky’s hands gripped the steering wheel with white-knuckled intensity, his eyes fixed on the view outside. 

“How did you know about Steve?” The question left his lips quietly, almost like an afterthought, but it was sharp all the same.

“Sam.” You hesitated for a moment, gathering your thoughts. “I kind of put the pieces together. It’s his dog tags you wear, right?” Your voice came out soft but steady.

Bucky gave a single, sharp nod. “Yeah.”

You sighed, glancing out the window for a brief second. The weight in his voice, the way he carried it like an old wound, told you this was something fragile, something that had never quite healed.

“I didn’t mean to intrude. I just…” You trailed off, the words dying on your tongue, uncertain, too small for the grief that lingered between you. Your gaze flickered to his, but he wasn’t looking at you.

His voice, when it came again, was quieter than before. “Steve... Steve, he wasn’t just my friend. He was my partner.”

Something inside you stilled. The breath you’d been meaning to take got caught in your chest. “You were… together? Dating?”

“Yeah.” His voice wavered, unsteady in a way that made your stomach twist. “We were, uh, in love, I guess.”

The words hit you like a cold gust, Something in your mind clicked into place, pieces of him you hadn’t understood suddenly making sense. You stared at him, taking in the way his brows furrowed, the way the crow’s feet at the corners of his eyes seemed more pronounced now, like he’d aged in the last few minutes.

“Did Sam know?”

“Yeah,” Bucky said, jaw tight. “A few people did. His family, mine. A few friends.”

“I’m sorry.” You swallowed, trying to push past the lump forming in your throat. The words felt inadequate, almost meaningless. “I know my words don’t mean much or change anything, but I truly am sorry that you lost someone that important to you.”

He didn’t reply right away. Instead, his grip tightened on the steering wheel, knuckles whitening, the leather creaking beneath his hold. His eyes stayed locked on the river, but he wasn’t really seeing it. He was somewhere else.

Then, barely above a whisper, “He stood on a landmine.”

Bucky’s voice was rough, worn thin. “He was dead before… before he would have even realised he’d stepped on it. They never really recovered all of his body. He just kinda… turned into mist.”

You felt your stomach drop. A slow, creeping horror curled around your ribs, sinking its claws in deep. “You saw it?”

“Yeah.”

“Bucky, that’s horrific, I—”  You felt your words die in your throat. What was there to say? There was no comfort for something like that. No words that could make it hurt less.

Then, slowly, his head turned, an empty, haunted gaze meeting yours. “That coffin out there, it’s empty. We do this every year, but it’s like talking to the wind.”

The words were like a punch to the gut. You swallowed hard, your throat tight with the rawness of it. Slowly, you reached across the console, your fingers brushing against his arm. “He didn’t suffer.”

“No.” Bucky's voice broke for the first time. “No, I suppose I should be thankful for that.” A tear slipped down his cheek, and he wiped it away with a rough, almost impatient hand. But he didn’t pull away from your touch. Didn’t move to hide the way his hands shook, fingers still locked in a vice grip around the wheel.

You didn’t comment on it.

You kept your hand on his arm, a steady presence against the tension coiled beneath his skin. There was nothing to say—at least, nothing that would make any of it easier. He had already said enough, and you weren’t going to insult him by pretending there were magic words to fix it. So you simply stayed, grounding him in the quiet, hoping that maybe, just maybe, letting even a sliver of it out might lighten the weight he carried.

The silence stretched, thick but not uncomfortable, the kind that settled in the space between two people who understood each other without needing to fill the gaps with empty words. A sharp gust of wind rattled against the window, slipping through unseen cracks and sending a shiver down your spine, but you didn’t move. Neither did he.

Then, finally, after what felt like an eternity, Bucky turned his head, his gaze locking onto yours, raw, searching, like he was looking for something he wasn’t even sure existed. His throat bobbed, lips parting as he exhaled a slow, uneven breath. “I’m sorry.”

You blinked, taken aback. “For what?”

“How I’ve treated you these past few weeks.”

“Baby, you don’t need to apologise—”

“No, I do.” He interrupted tone tinged with frustration. “I… I realised that I cared for you. A lot. And it scared the shit out of me. After Steve, well, I swore I wouldn’t love again. I couldn’t… I couldn’t imagine going through that again. Or worse, if I died and left someone behind like that—”

You shook your head, cutting him off gently. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not though—” he began, but you interrupted him again, your voice calm, sure.

“I forgive you.”

Bucky went still, his expression unreadable for a moment as he processed your words. His jaw clenched, his eyes flicking between you and the river, as if weighing something in his mind.

A long, charged silence settled in. Then, just as you thought the moment would pass, he spoke, his voice quieter this time. “You’re sure?”

“Of course, I’m sure.” You smiled softly. “Listen. I didn’t know Steve, and I never will but… if he cared for you. If he loved you, he’d want you to be happy. He wouldn’t want you to shut yourself away from love, from feeling.”

“Honestly…” Bucky paused, sucking on his teeth. “Honestly, you’re probably right, doll.”

Bucky let out a slow breath, staring ahead like he was trying to gather his thoughts.

“I still don’t know how to do this,” he admitted, voice quiet. “Loving someone. Letting someone love me.”

You smiled softly, tilting your head. “Good thing I’m patient.”

He huffed a laugh, shaking his head. “Yeah, that much is obvious.” Bucky glanced at you out of the corner of his eye, something unreadable flickering across his expression. Then, almost too softly to hear, “I want to try.”

You reached over, lacing your fingers through his. “Then we’ll figure it out together.”

His grip tightened, just for a second like he was anchoring himself to you. And then, as if realising how ridiculous he sounded, he let out a low laugh, disbelief lacing his tone. “You’re too good for me, doll.”

“Hmm, maybe.” You giggled, leaning towards him, resting your forehead against his shoulder for a brief moment, letting the warmth between you settle. “I think I’ll stick around, though.”

“Yeah?” His voice held a tinge of uncertainty like he was testing the waters. His arm shifted, moving from the wheel to pull you closer to his side. “I haven’t scared you off?”

You tilted your head to look up at him, grinning. “I think you’d have to try a little harder to do that.”

He held you closer, his voice softer now, almost hesitant. “So…” He paused, his breath hitching as if the words were caught in his throat. “Would you stick around… as my girlfriend?”

You jolted up, eyes widening in surprise. “Did the Bucky Barnes just ask me—”

“Shush, you.” He chuckled, cutting you off, his finger moving to gently press against your lips.

You smiled, pressing a sloppy kiss to his cheek, and he tugged you in closer, his grip firm but not demanding. His lips found yours, slow at first, testing—like he was still convincing himself this was okay, that he could have this. But as you melted into him, your fingers curling against the fabric of his jacket, something shifted. His hand slid up your back, anchoring you against him, his lips warm, sure, moving against yours with a quiet intensity.

You sighed into him, your breath mingling with his, the space between you disappearing until there was nothing but the press of his body, the soft scrape of his stubble against your skin. His fingers skimmed the nape of your neck, tilting your head slightly, and he kissed you again, slower this time, savouring it like he wanted to memorise the way you felt against him.

The world outside blurred, the hum of the car engine distant, unimportant. There was only this, only him, his warmth, the quiet, desperate way he held you like he was afraid to let go.

When you pulled away, Bucky let out a sharp sigh as if something inside him had finally relaxed. “Thank god, it would be kind of awkward if you didn’t—”

You silenced him with another kiss, and for the first time in what felt like forever, everything felt right.

A spark reignited. 

[fairytoge]

sick and tired ; geto suguru

notes!!

missing my husband sm :( but!! with the end of jjk being about a week ago now, i thought i'd maybs begin writing again idk

also!! this is set in an au where geto doesn't defect bc i cannot be doing that rn 😭and it was written last minute so be kindddd plsplsplspls

but yesss!! i hope you enjoy it and sorry for the millionth time for not posting much lmao

m.list

"i hate this," geto mumbled from beneath the sheer amount of blankets you had piled on top of him. "i hate that you and satoru are still going on missions while i'm still... like this."

you were busying around geto's room, half listening to your boyfriend and half focusing on tidying up the uncared-for clothes and the piles of tissues that had begun to cascade around his bin. it had been just thirty minutes since you had entered the room, and he had continued to grumble and complain about being ill.

you understood! you truly, truly did! but after ten minutes and the unintelligible grievances from your boyfriend, along with the scratchiness of his throat, you were more sympathetic to his voice than to the fact he was forced to take a break from being a sorcerer.

"suguru." you sighed, your voice having a soft but noticeable edge to it. "i love you, so, so, so much..."

with those words, you settled the stack of clothes down on geto's desk and approached his bed. there, where he was lying under the mountain of pillows, blankets, and practically anything else that had some sort of comfort value, he gazed up at you — not unappreciative of the affection but knowing that you were about to say something else.

"... but please, please just accept that you're not gonna go on missions until you're better again. being sad and holding a grudge against your own body is a tad ridiculous, honey."

the room was silent for a long moment: geto clearly trying to find a way to respond to you as his mouth opened and closed a couple of times. it was, after another pause, that he finally shut his mouth, sharply squinting at you. "you're so lucky you're you, and not satoru."

raising an eyebrow, you squatted down to geto's bedside, humming in partial agreement. kissing your boyfriend's forehead, you smirked slightly. "sometimes i think you'd prefer me to be satoru."

little to say, the pillows you had previously piled on suguru quickly weighed down on you instead.

© fairytogeㅤ ꔫㅤ please do not copy, repost, translate, etc without my permission

[the-moon-files]

Waaaa, I LOVE your writing for Linked Universe! >w< I've never thought about the trope of humans as space orcs, but I love it now djfngd- If you don't mind me asking, is there anything that the reader might be weak to (comedic or otherwise)? Or is he basically indestructible/immune to a lot of things?

sorry for late reply!! ;-; thank u sm for saying that abt my writing, and yess yesss my humans v hylians au agenda is spreading lets gooo!!!

(bro u know ur desperate for gifs when ur making ur own atp jfc 💀)

Sun: Guide!Reader, Masc Male Reader (he/him)

Orbit: LONG AS HELL Headcanons-ish, Humans are not hylians AU

Stars: Classic Chain of Links, not specific

Comets & Meteors: CWs: mild cussing, typical Loz violence, weight is mentioned as a weakness/detriment,

& TWs: Possible weight trigger, reader is described as heavy and weight has a negative impact on environment, but in a way thats meant to convey they "weigh more" bc theyre human in comparison to hylians/hylian built things ( for ex: hylians are hollow boned compared to humans).

Please stop reading at line "alright thats all for sleeping for rn, i could keep going but i wanna get to weight issue a little bit even tho ive got less for it" if you want to avoid explicit details of this.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

so I could see this being both crack and angst fuel tbh

ive talked abt this somewhat on other posts/asks, but figured i could really get into all the potential weaknesses over here since ive gotten a lot of ideas abt it!

so a quick list of things ive thought of that could be weaknesses, both based on like, if this were a “video game to real world” format for us, coming from earth, and other junk ill explain

in no particular order, some weakness ideas ive had (or other anons tbh!):

weight, much heavier than Links/avg hylian (sink to bottom when swimming/cant ride their horses/cant be carried out when hurt/sick/etc.)

slow healing when u do get injured, compared to quick healing hylians who can just eat food to get better quicker

magic absorption (too much juice, body not accustomed, get sick, like eating too much magic food/using too much of magic tools/weapons)

or magic negation (cant get healed by magic, for ex: if a dragon is all magic, then u cant ride it, or if food is magical u cant eat it)

easy to get sick (new environment/ppl/area/etc.)

fall damage (tho greater height) is still applicable

hylians dont have the same pack-bonding/affection/social needs as humans, like how Wild + most Links could do their whole adventure by themselves, rarely talking to anyone, if you’ve ever seen the survival show “Alone”, one of the first things that get them to quit isnt the terrain/little food (tho thats usually next), its the fact they get lonely and miss their spouses/family/friends, sad af, youd have to assault the links for attention and hope ur not annoying the fuck outta them all the time 😭😭

stamina, ur stuck w/whatever u had before getting whisked away (for example: u just have to hope ur immune to guardian beams bc u may not be able to outrun one 💀, or just bc u can swim against the tide doesnt mean u can do so for very long, depending on ur stamnia)

not rlly a weakness, but u having a different perception of what’s “too little” clothing compared to the medieval time period hylians lmao

needing more sleep than hylians, from how in game they either outright dont need sleep, can go with only a few hours and fight Ganon, or other nonsense around sleeping, ACTUALLY also hylians being able to sleep anywhere in any position, whereas u need a good 8-9 hours every night to function normally (u cant rlly take shifts at night w/o getting fucked) and u also need a half-decent sleeping bag/not hardass ground to sleep on w/o getting morning dew soaking u thru (ive been on many misadventures camping, so i could rlly get into it when it comes to wilderness camping yall, like im not high maintenance but there are def some bare minimum things u need to function in the wild, trust me guys, its a thing/pet peeve of mine to get into how a 10 person constant camping trip would acc function 💀)

if you’ve got any other ideas, pls comment them or shoot an ask my way! these were all i could think of for rn

so im just gonna pick the ones ive expanded the least on in other posts, like the sleeping thing, weight thing, and im abt to do another ask (🥺<33) abt the human culture v hylian thing so thatll do for now

SO to continue the rlly long sleep weakness (srry)

to my credit, ive been tent camping pretty frequent in past couple years, with either my sibling, or sib and a friend, in the ruralness of our homestate (we’re in southern part of US)

like as a quick rundown of my creditable-ness, bc im sure ur like “moon. nobody cares what u have to say, ur prob chronically online bro” nah, dude, read this bs:

U can skip this if u just trust me, this is just a mildly entertaining lore dump of mine for proof i know anything at all abt tent camping:

for ref, ive: slept all night in a hammock w/a sheet bc the air mattress deflated/was sleeping on the ground otherwise which is borderline impossible to do even when exhausted ive found out, a lightning storm rolled in, i just kept sleeping, had to pack up tent in middle of the night bc it slowly got flooded bc rain got into tent, had to park on a random overgrown country road (no GPS) to car-camp for the night bc no campsite was found, have had to constantly put up tent in complete darkness bc its very hard to get my sibling and me to a campsite when theres still daylight for some reason?? lol, began to worry for hypothermia when we camped near mountains bc it got too cold to tent camp, had to intensely cuddle for warmth w/friend in truck bed, while sib was inside the car and still couldnt get warm, and it was so cold even then that it kept waking us up until we left at like 4-5am bc it got light enough for us to see to drive away 💀

ANYWAY, now that ive gotten my obligatory “i touch grass” out of the way,

(and also i def plan to use these experiences as future fic scenes, so easter egg if u read this then my fics later lmao)

sleeping is literally the first issue u gotta deal w/in going constant camping w/these guys lmao

and u bet ur ass they all find it kinda funny that u need such specific sleeping stuff when ur nigh indestructible the rest of the time

but its honest to god not even that much, it just is for hylians

so they can just sleep on rocks, flat ground, tree roots, u name it these crazy elves can do it, esp since the Links r adventurers so im sure theyre better at it than normal hylians

they dont need a tent, they barely need sleeping bags, bc the cold hard ground is legit their home 💀

the only reason they have padding at all is bc theyre more sensitive to temperature than u, so theyre more bundled up on breezy nights/for morning dew chill time

(which u found to ur horror they just dont put anything down but like a sheet when its warm weather, mostly for keeping dirt off them)

meanwhile ur like?? get a tent??? we have Wild’s slate to store it we dont even have to carry it????

and bc theyre made for hylians, the tents just like a ceiling w/poles 💀

ur out here like, “bro this would keep u more warm if there were yknow, walls. and a floor.”

which u then have to force the combined skills of Legend, Wild and Four to help u make a real tent

Legend has absolutely taken to calling you Sleeping Beauty/Princey bc of this, and the fact that u have to layer like 2 sleeping bags to not feel rocks on ur back (bc they only need it for warmth not cushioning, its thinner than human made ones)

u also have to force Time + Wars to acknowledge that u guys needs to put the tent on flat ground, and cant just sprawl out over a bunch of tree roots goddamit-

when u first learn what the watch schedule is, it sounds like actual hell.

each shift is like 4 hours, and everyone is awake and ready to go at like 5 or 6 am (the 6am is for teh Links that “sleep in” 💀)

and thats putting them at going to sleep at like 11 or midnight, bc hylians need way less sleep than ur human ass,

which the poor said hylians also find out the hard way when they go to wake the single human man on their team up, and u just outright cuss them out, hit the nearest link, rain hell on them + seem like ur drunk to them?? then just go back to sleep???

and theyre all like “wtf just happened to our guide, he’s usually so nice??”

only to realize after u all have a sit down abt the sleeping differences issues, after what theyre calling “The Sleeping Guide Incident” 💀

hylians snap awake only a few minutes after being awake (like how in SS/Oot/Botw etc u can be a little sleepy but game mechanics let u get up pretty quick)

and u need more sleep, so they just adjust and know now u need whatever u can get tbh, so ur not allowed to go on night shifts,

along w/being allowed to ride on Epona + get piggy back sleep on a Link if they rlly need to move and u havent gotten all ur required sleep yet

(tho u do try and compensate by going to sleep earlier)

(they would never tell u but, they lowkey fight/rock paper scissors who gets to carry u in the morning, Wind is the ref lol)

also hylians can sleep like a rock thru most anything, along w/this adventure which easily keeps u tired so ur ready to knock out every night,

this is why its important for someone to take watch, bc i think unless they outright get hit by a monster/shaken by another hylian, most links dont get up when sleeping no matter what

which makes sense, if theyre going to sleep so little, they prob need as much uninterrupted sleep as possible,

but just bc they can sleep thru lynel stomping doesnt mean u can, which is another adjustement they make when they choose a place to sleep at night, making sure its not a loud spot or smth, and bc u now have to sleep earlier to keep up w/their early ass times,

when the Links are all chilling around camp, they make sure to keep pretty quiet so u can sleep well <3

alright thats all for sleeping for rn, i could keep going but i wanna get to weight issue a little bit even tho ive got less for it

i mentioned it in other posts that hylians are lighter than humans, but i mostly focused on it going one way if that makes sense? like now im taking it in the way of like Humans are heavier than hylians, if that makes more sense??

u cant ride horses, at least not for very long lmao

same goes for loftwings, if u can even get on for any amount of time, bc they presumably have hollow bones so theyd be even more sensitive to ur weight than horses

omg when it comes to puzzles, and theres like weights involved, u absolutely get used as an additional weight, both bad and good tbh

bc im familiar w/botw im using it as a base, but like how shrines need a metal box or two to put on buttons to weigh them down, but it gets tricky, or u dont have one right away, Wild just uses you 💀

like u need some exact amount of metal things for this one scale puzzle, and instead u just, sit on it to sink it all the way down so the Link on the other side can reach the platform LMAO

omg the amount of battles that could just be won bc u used ur body weight against a monster lol

THE SCENE OF U AND A HINOX SQUARING UP TO LIKE SUMO WRESTLE AND U WIN W/UR WEIGHT LMAOO

just run at a lynel, dodging arrows, and just like, successfully full-body tackle it bc it feels like it has the same weight as a large dog, like a husky or smth 💀

u act like a bomb when u throw urself off cliffs bc u dont get fall damage easy, so u can manage like a ten-story building drop u found out w/o a scratch, but u cause a crater around u bc of ur impact lmao

Wild/Wind/Rulie/Legend are all having the time of their lives having u cannonball into the ground next to monster camps bc ur just a human bomb atp

kno this was less weakness focused but heres one more rough weakness of it,

u all have to be VERY careful around bridges or thin strips of land, or like crossing tree branches, etc. w/you bc ur weight may make it not possible cross w/o ridiculously being this single human person bringing an entire bridge down 💀

think the only way u could fix this glaring issue is if u outright jumped across, which even tho ur basically superpowered bc ur so strong here so youd have to fuck up pretty bad to not make it,

poor boys get worried sick anyway and try to avoid bridges if they can, they only trust ones that are like stone built up from the ground to carry you

this also sucks when its like a rope bridge across like a huge gap or like a small valley or smth, bc not only do u not have a landing spot in the immediate area, but now u have to reroute until u can find a spot that lets u basically jump across the gap lmao

on one hand, the Chain r still anxious letting u go alone to sometimes find that different route, but also if anyone went w/u youd just have to piggyback them while doing that, and its not like theyd be that helpful besides moral support maybe lmao

but u dont mind that and none of them can stand being seperated from u w/o knowing at least one Link is w/u, so u usually go ahead and piggyback Wind or Four (one of the lightest) find a route and leap ur way to the other side lol

u also found out the hard way that ur weight affects hylian made buildings, bc they can be made out of not as dense/strong woods, like especially things like floors/beds/chairs/etc stuff that would be made to take hylian weight

the absolute insanity the first time u guys went to an inn, and u crushed both the steps leading into the inn, a barstool, a chair, and later that night ur bedframe just from gently laying on it 💀

the innkeeper realized and re-arranged so u guys were on first floor so u wouldnt have to go up steps, and was luckily very understanding abt u being a different weightier race (Time and you still tipped him rupees to help pay for damage 😭)

u had to literally go back outside to sleep bc u were worried if u slept on the floor it slowly break overnight LMAO

but Wind/Wild/Four/Rulie/Twi were all sweet enough to come w/you to sleep outside too lol (they were more nature inclined anyway, even tho u insisted they take advantage of the beds)

this was also absolutely hilarious for the others to wake up to in the morning, bc Time/Wars/Sky/Legend had already gone to bed,

so they just walk out the inn, all confused why the innkeeper just pointed outside when they asked where the others went, and they jsut open the front door (w/still broken steps bc u had to exit 💀)

to see u guys camped out on the lawn ASHFDFL

☆

😃. well that got out of hand, and its getting late for me so I may have 10x the amount of spelling/grammar mistakes more than usual, and it may have completely lost the plot in some points so-!

i hope that was smth for u to at least chew on anon, and sorry i overdid it jfccc

have a great rest of ur week anon, and tysm for the ask!! :D

comments/commentary in tags/feeback at all keep me alive, so pls leave one w/whatever u think!!

Peace out,

🌙

[rabbitsrams]

okay so my last anon thing i’m like sick rn and didn’t realize i put wilbur instead of ted or schlatt-

but anyway, ted/schlatt having random beef with their partner’s pet(s) because their partner is always talking about how much they love and adore their pets

- 🎞️

holy shit anon im also sick high five

lmao yes this is such a good idea i'll do some hcs for both of em <3

skull emoji i accidentally posted this early sorry if u saw it incomplete but its complete now

schlatt:

♡ always declares jambo/the other guy are better

♡ "psh, so what."

♡ pretends not to care but he does. so badly.

♡ every time he comes over you're cooing over your pet and he's like >:(

♡ he wants ur attention too!!

♡ one day he's streaming with you and you have to leave to take care of your pet and he's pretends not to care but he does bc he wants u to be around :(

♡ you talking about your pets a lot while at events w/ schlatt and he's like

♡ you know how he feels abt your pet but you encourage him to be nice cuz you love them both sm

♡ one day you ask him to pet sit and he refuses (half jokingly)

♡ but the more he spends time with them, he now realizes why you love them so much

♡ "don't tell y/n, but you're not that bad."

ted:

♡ always (half) jokes that you love your pet more than you love him

♡ "that's not true teddy!"

♡ is a bit sad when you replace your lockscreen from a photo of you and him with a pic of your pet

♡ but pretends it's not a big deal lol

♡ one day when you're filming a video together at your place, your pet walks into frame and you drop everything to spend time with them

♡ "baby, the video?"

♡ "yes yes, just a sec!"

♡ (a sec = 15 min)

♡ he left some footage of them in the video and the fans loved it

♡ letting go of the jealousy bc he knows how much u love ur pet and he knows u love him a lot too <3

[yuri-is-online]

Sorry if this ask makes absolutely no sense I just need you to know the absolute emotion I feel because of this Ayuu.

I need you to know just . how close to tears I am . I just reread your Azul meeting his Yutu and I am. IM CRYING. THE “Your daddy’s here” IS TAKING ME OUT AND SHOOTING ME DEAD . IM GENUINELY TEARING UP. I think I’ve read every part so far twice over, barring the Yuu specific ones cause they Hurt Me. Speaking of hurt, Deuce!Yutu and Riddle!Yutu hurt me so so bad . All of the Yutus do, but they’re the ones that just came to mind rn and it’s so so sad. Especially Riddle! Yutu because he hates his dad :( Idek why I might’ve blocked out why LMAO,,, I love all the Heartslabyul characters and their kids it makes me cry. Especially Trey. He’s such a weirdly domestic freak that the idea of him being denied the family life he’s always been content with is so so sad. ALL OF THEM . THEY MAKE ME SO SAD BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE WITH YUU!! They want to be with Yuu, and most of them are obviously happy to have a kid, but to know that that’s been taken away from you by circumstances that are literally destroying the world you live and love in? Yeah. That’s Rough!!

I would love to see Jamil!Yutu and how Jamil reacts to his child feeling guilt for something he never did, was never responsible for, and again has to suffer through because of the family theirs has been forced to serve. I think he’d be so mad, so so mad this boy has grown up thinking he’s the biggest blight of his father’s life, the cause of his death, when in reality he’s probably someone Original Timeline! Jamil would have cherished.

I LOVE YOU RUGGIE BUCCHI!!! Sorry I needed to cry that out this made me love him so much more!!! And Rook!! I love you Rook Hunt you weirdo. Ruggie being like “Idrk what to do… but I can bug Leona about it” is so so real. Him not caring if his son is charismatic as long as he knows his cards and is able to survive. Rook as a phantom is genuinely breaking my heart idk why. All of the phantoms break my heart. I don’t want to imagine anything abt them if I do because if I imagine them having even a fraction of sentience I’m heartbroken. Imagine being unable to prevent something from possessing you. Imagine your body and soul being used to tear your home apart— imagine seeing any of that through your own eyes. Imagine seeing your own kid after years of thinking them missing. I would genuinely not be able to handle that. It’s giving the Last of Us zombies where they’re completely aware and conscious throughout the first phase. Scared . Heartbroken .

Anyways, this au is 100000/10 I need you to know this. YOUR MIND IS SO SO BRILLIANT!!! I’m probably gonna keep rereading everything you’ve written so far about it because I’m having so many brain worms . So so many. Sorry for this ramble!! Please ignore this ask if for any reason I might have said something you didn’t like >:]]]] I HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL YEAR!!!!

;-; ty so much for your kind words anon I am injecting them into my veins to continue writing. You have said nothing wrong, rambles are nice to receive, though my ask box is a bit cluttered at the moment and I am super busy so getting to things in a timely manner is not something I am able to do.

Riddle! Yutu was the first one to get a post, and I am tempted to re do it as I was still figuring out the format. He hates his dad because he wasn't there for him when he was a child and he doesn't know why. In the good timeline he's something of a daddy's boy; he really wants Riddle to be proud of and praise him

After I finish editing the second part of Rook's post you will be pleased to know the next post is about Jamil. I'm still formulating the outline of it because I've been thinking some thoughts about stars and unique magics

The way I write the phantoms they posses the instincts of their former selves but the individual lacks the input you might associate with consciousness. I'll get more into it in the second half of Rook's post... but there is a degree of awareness of their actions.

There's a lot of tragedy in this ayuu, I'm glad I'm hitting my stride with it c: it's nice to know people are liking it

[haveateadude]

i should put it all behind me, shouldn't i?

summary *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ where ellie and dina have been letting the past linger for too long

warnings *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ ptsd—it's not mentioned but it's definitely there. a little bit of angst and the rest is fluff, though. this is sweet with sad undertones i would say

author notes *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ sorry for not being active, i really wanted to post stuff but i had school (i'm finally on break!!) and my mental health got so bad i stopped enjoying literally everything lmao. but dw i'm going back to therapy and luckily i'm alright now and i have huge urges to write so. also the coffee i had is giving me so much anxiety🙄like fucking bitch can i enjoy one cup of coffee in peace?? damn, let a girl live. also i'm shaking ass to guess rn, literally best collab fucking EVER, the mv got me giggling and blushing and shit

Ellie is trying, Dina can see. She's trying to get better—better at whatever they have, whatever this is. Still, she's trying to become a better person, blend into the lives they now have, leave the past behind.

Dina can see it in the little things, in the little actions: when Ellie gets up to cradle JJ when he's crying, waking up earlier than she should to cook breakfast, water the plants, and helping Dina clean. It's subtle, but it's there. The effort. It's somewhere.

But you know what's also somewhere? Ellie leaving her. Ellie leaving for revenge. Ellie leaving. Ellie leaving. Ellie leaving. It creeps through the cracked floors and broken mirrors like the sun coming from a window. 

Dina trusts—maybe more than she should—Ellie. A lot. And it fucking scares her. Ellie is so predictable yet unreadable in a way that makes her bones itch. She knows it's not Ellie's fault. Because it isn't. Grief leads to places some of us can't reach, it plagues your mind like poison ivy—like an illness you cannot control, it leaves you stranded, wordless, sick to your stomach, knots in your throat; or like a friend, someone you don't know when they're going to leave or know when they're going to come back, if they ever do.

So, Dina, by default, is scared when she doesn't find Ellie anywhere in the house. She tries not to worry but fails at it. Fear fills her body from head to toe.

She left again, is her first thought. She left again, there's nothing I can do. Where is she? Where is she? Where is she?

Finally, she sees her. She sees Ellie, sitting at the outside stairs, playing the guitar—or trying to, at least. The sky is still dark, and the stars shine brighter than ever. Dina takes a second to calm down and breathe. When she feels ready and her beating heart has come back to normal, she opens the door.

"Ellie?" She asks, with her hand still on the doorknob.

Ellie turns around, and then breathes out, "Dina."

She puts the guitar aside like she's embarrassed. Her cheeks are flushed under the moonlight, Dina can see.

"You okay?" Dina asks as she sits next to Ellie. 

Ellie nods, crossing her arms and looking ahead, eyes staring into nothing. Dina's heart aches at the sight.

They sit in silence for a while. The sky is beautiful. Dina used to dread it because that was the way it looked when Ellie left—the moon looked lovely, and the constellations had seemed to wake up all of a sudden and they were all over the night sky. The wind was nice, also. That night she sat outside, hoping for Ellie to come back, and cried when she realized that Ellie wasn't coming back until she was gasping for air—until she ran out of tears. She then prayed for Ellie's safety and went to wake up JJ.

"It's never going to end, isn't it?" Ellie suddenly speaks. She isn't crossing her arms anymore, more so hugging herself. Dina frowns. "The fear you have… about me leaving, I mean."

Dina sighs because she thinks that might be true. 

"Well," she starts saying, "if it makes you feel better, I have a lot of fears."

Ellie nods, holding a guilty look as she looks at Dina, "Right."

"I do get…" She stops herself, trying to put into words what she's feeling in the best way—in a way that wouldn't sound mean. "I do get why you left, I just think it wasn't fair for me. We had a baby, for fuck's sake. And you were going to leave without saying anything!"

"I know," Ellie acknowledges it easily, like she has thought about it a lot. Her voice shakes.

"God, I'm not even mad at you," Dina lets the tears fall and lets the sadness and anger and all of the emotions she hasn't been allowing herself to feel sit with her. "I'm fucking pissed. And I love you, and it's fucking me up, Ellie."

Ellie looks down, fidgeting with her index finger. She sighs, looking guilty, and for a moment Dina enjoys it. She enjoys the fact that Ellie regrets leaving because a part of her was scared that Ellie didn't feel anything about abandoning her with a kid.

Ellie opens her mouth to say something, then closes it instantly. After shaking her head she decides to speak again. Her voice is less soft than it was in the whole conversation. "I'm so fucking sorry, Dina. I just—I had to do it. I wasn't gonna be capable of living with myself if I pretended that revenge wasn't all I thought about... I didn't kill Abby, by the way."

Dina sucks in a breath as she hears Ellie, even though she isn't in much shock. Alright, well, that's new. Ellie never talked about Abby ever since she had come back. Dina just guessed she was dead.

"Why?"

"It wasn't gonna change anything, was it?" Ellie answers, shrugging. 

Dina moves closer to Ellie, quietly wrapping her arms around her, and sniffling. Ellie hugs Dina back and takes a deep breath, as if she hadn't been letting herself breathe properly this past few weeks—her shoulders slump, the weight finally off her back.

"Promise me you'll never leave like that again?"

"I think leaving made me realize how much I love you," Ellie says, staring into Dina's eyes and pulling away gently, wiping Dina's tears with the pads of her thumbs. "I promise."

Ellie's forehead rests against Dina's and Dina's mind wanders to the day she left, but this feels so much different. This doesn't feel like Ellie's gonna leave and that everything is going fucking wrong; this feels like love, like real love—the type of love that you can feel and see and touch, the type of love that feels too real to be true, the type of love that makes you wanna rip out the skin on your chest and show the word that you've got a heart underneath and that that heart is capable of loving someone.

This feels like things can be okay again.

[daemonbrain]

I love your writing so much!! I can’t believe I missed you posting part 2 of perv Simon omg I just read it and it was so good 😭 I adore the way you write him.

I’m pretty new to this fandom (?) and Simon has overtaken me body and soul. Part 1 was one of the first things I read and ugh I just love this garbage man who is soft for the sweet girl he can’t help but fall for. He’s so awful but is he really if he can’t abide shithead husbands😫🤚🏻??? Your honor he’s a good man, he can jizz on any of my worldly possessions no problem.

I’m sure whatever you have planned for this series will be perfection, and I’m so excited to continue reading! For now, I’m patiently waiting and fantasizing that Simon decides to intimidate shithead!husband into leaving her, forcing him to tell her it’s to be with the woman he’s been cheating on her with. As much as I love when the hot scary man is homicidal, I really want her to fall hard for him, and I think that would be much easier for her if he’s not dead, if she’s instead manipulated into Simon’s arms in a moment of weakness and insecurity because why isn’t she good enough 🥺

Alternatively, I’m hoping that Simon kills him slow and mean, serves him right for mistreating Simon’s pretty birdie. But if so I hope birdie matches his freak, and when she finds out he killed him a couple weeks later, she lowkey doesn’t care. I know it’s so unrealistic but I love when reader likes dark men (truly self inserting lmao) and I would hate for her to be scared of him 🥺. I want him pervy and evil but I also want him soft and loving and there’s no reason for her to fear him ☺️☺️☺️

Omg I was about to click ask and then I realized what I truly deeply want is for shithead!husband to find out about Simon and birdie and to smack her around a bit, truly crushing her loving image of him. She wants to leave him now that she knows how bad of a husband he truly is, especially when she notices him being less subtle with his obvious signs of cheating. Simon sees her at the butcher shop, and while she’s concealed the bruise on her cheek well, she can’t hide the change in her gait and breathing caused by the deep bruises on her rib cage. Simon confronts her, offering (forcing her) to come with him so he can protect her. Shithead!husband shows up and Simon takes care of him 🥰 and birdie feels bad, is a bit scared, but how sad and scared can she be when Simon is right there to make her feel better 😈☺️💗

Okay I’m sorry for my ramblings!! Happy writing :)

I reblog to my side blog btw :) much love! 💗💗💗

ME RN RN:

STOP ITTTTTT. First off im honored to be one of the first fics you read for our beloved simon since there’s SOOOOOO many great fics out there for him. That being said, you’re actually the first person who’s sent me an ask so wow im so happy!! Literally thank you for taking the time to send your ideas and inputs, as well as complimenting my writing you have 0 idea how much that actually means to me 💕💕

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR THE RAMBLES. I LOVE THE RAMBLES. GIVE ME ALL OF THEM!!!

But yeah the jizz part is so real because im not gonna lie i reached into some depraved-ish parts of my mind for that one (i would fight someone for that toothbrush). If you didn’t know i’m pretty new to posting on tumblr and genuinely just getting back into writing fanfics so i’m not super used to posting smut and all so i’m glad you enjoyed it. I try and balance it to make it seem kinda canon. I don’t see simon being someone dark/physical, more like unintentionally creepy like “ugh gotta protect her from everything even by extreme means 🫡🫡” man def does not know where the line is.

I’m a sucker for sweet reader and so is simon! He’d never do anything to harm and trust she is neeeeever gonna have to deal with that mean husband of hers soon enough.

I will warn you, i’m currently working on what’s probably gonna be like 20k+ words for a Jaime Lannister fic (its at 15k and im only at phase 1/4) sooo i don’t think stalker simon will be making an appearance for a fair amount of time (im sorry 😭). I’m pretty sure it will be getting a part 3 though, just not sure when.

Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to send this, it brightens my day to know you enjoyed the uh.. creativity.. i bring to Simon Riley. Have a great day or night wherever you are xx

[vonabel]

Whaat are your thoughts about the leaks? I was just excited that there was more art LMAO

OMG okay first of all, ur getting a whole essay from me rn I'm so sorry. And second of all, me too, like getting a mostly cohesive ending was nice but I'm really just in it for the literal art and new media atp. But, I do still have many thoughts.

Honestly, I liked it! I haven't seen all of it, but I have seen a ton of people posting how they feel about it which is giving me some context clues.

I guess Aizawa wasn't seen at all, which does make me sad because he's one of my favorites. I don't actually know how much of the chapter was leaked, I don't go out of my way to find leaks so I've just seen it all in passing on my various socials. But like if the whole thing wasn't leaked, we could still get the Eraserhead closure we need fr 🙏 and if not, it is what it is

I think Shouto looks really happy and healthy, which was so healing to see after the last few episodes of season seven 😭😭😭 like let him breathe PLEASE good fucking lord. And Touya's death being confirmed was really sad but also expected.

Also Shoji being ranked at like nine (I think, I can't remember) was SOOO refreshing. I really really like that Hori put someone who started as a background character so high up in the ranks. And Shoji was my blorbo for two or three years, so I'm fr like a proud momma LMAO

I think Mirio being ranked number one was a given, I saw it coming from a mile away after everything Sir Nighteye had said about him/to him. But I do HATE his new hair omg omg UGLYYY LMAOO

As for IzuOcha basically being canon, I personally love that! I like that it took them years to get there, and I was especially emotional over Toga being the one to give Ochako the nudge she needed, literally. The way that Ochako saw Toga's ghost and Deku saw Shigaraki's was a beautiful parallel that was really well done in my opinion.

I'm personally not a bkdk shipper, so the whole like rejection thing didn't piss me off like it did other fans. I think it was the perfect ending for them, nicely done and very bittersweet, which is how their relationship has always sort of been.

Deku being happy and at peace is really all I wanted LOL, he seems totally content where he is and I think him looping back around to being quirkless again was like soooo on point for the story and the way everything came together in the end! And I think Bakugo seemed rather happy too, settled and all that.

So all in all, I think it was good! I think the people hating take this shit way too seriously, especially the people who are particularly upset over bkdk not being canon. Ships are actually never that serious I fear.

The only thing that sort of disappointed me was that everyone from class 1a got a sick ass glow up except Deku. Like don't get me wrong, he looked FIIINNNE as all hell. But like Sero has a mustache (which is so hot) and Shinsou has long ass hair but Deku still has almost the exact same character design 😭 like damn switch it up for my boy a little bit, give him a hair cut or some shit idk

thank you for asking im actually honored 😩🙏

[leopardom]

because it’s gonna be 12 months from the start of this fandom (kinda mostly here anyway), would you like to give me a fav moment from every month so far (can be fandom related, can be only jo related)? if that’s something you’re in the mood rn 🩷

absolutely 🤩

welcome to the ✨Joker Out Chronicles (May 2023 - March 2024)✨ as viewed by user leopardom

this is gonna be a list of fav moments from every month so far and since i couldn't choose, it's gonna be both band related and fandom related

this is gonna be long so more under the cut

May 2023

band: the whole eurovision journey from befriending all the contestants to Bojan's date and eventual engagement with Käärijä to the band giving condoms to everyone and their mom to the rehearsals to the iconic turqoise carpet to the Käärijä sauna to the voting promo to the qualification to the finals to Bojan licking the camera and to Joker Out becoming pretty much esc legends despite finishing 21st in the final. the beginning of everything, absolutely chaotic but i wouldn't imagine it any other way

fandom: the formation this sounds cliche yes but i was here since April 2023 and it was... very silent. the non-esc related jo stuff were limited and people were still discovering them so yeah i was sitting here hoping that after esc people would stick around so we can scream together about the band as a band and not only as esc contestants. and thankfully people did that and here we are now 🥹

June 2023

band: first international gigs the gigs in Dublin are one thing but then came the announcements of the Nordic tour, the Warsaw gigs, the headline gigs in Novi Sad and Zagreb... honourable mention to Stožice going sold out

fandom: Tavastia 1.0 there's absolutely no way i will even forget how the jo, ka and esc fandoms had a collective meltdown when Bojan casually showed up in Helsinki and then joined Käärijä on stage on both his Tavastia gigs (mind you both as a singer and as a dancer lmao). no wonder why this moment still has a chokehold on all of us. 9th of June 2023, you will always be famous

July 2023

band: the appearance of Demoni scream i know that festivals and the first UK run were important and gave us some iconic moments too (like some slay outfits and Jan's sparklative confusion), but the damn Demoni scream is so dear to me it kinda tops it all. it's so good to see how Bojan embraced it after that first time (2/7/23 in Škofja Loka) and now there can't be Demoni without the scream/growl/whatever you wanna call it

fandom: the Jance wedding on stage iirc the Jance brainrot had started spawning before 29/7 but that Saturday night was the cherry on top. so glad we got to experience this live as well since there was a livestream going on that night and we saw Jan putting the veil on Nace himself <3

August 2023

band: the Koper gig i wasn't even there okay but judging from the content and people's comments on it, it was probably one of the most iconic jo gigs. also my favourite jo video in existence is coming from that night (here) side note: i've been to Slovenia once in my life, 11 years ago, and funnily enough we were staying in Koper and i recognised the place they had the concert. anyway, visit Slovenia and Koper, it's a very nice small seaside town and it's worth the visit <3

fandom: the collective screaming about things to be completely honest i don't remember much from that month in terms of fandom, but i kinda remember how most of us had started diving into the band's past more and more and “new” old content was posted almost every day. videos, photos, gifs, interviews, the amazing @jokeroutsubs translating more old content...

September 2023

band: Nordic tour i won't even start talking about this because you'll never hear the end of it. we all know what the Nordic tour was. even the release of SSOL, the first single after esc, can't top this whole thing, sorry

fandom: google drive content and *shocked gasp* Nordic tour another collective meltdown for the fandom. first being bombarder with backstage videos on a damn google drive folder (that ended up being a frequent occurence in the following months) to the whole run of the Nordic tour. do i need to say more? i feel like i can't. only this: Nordic tour, you will always be famous

October 2023

band: Stožice not much to say here either. they sold out a whole arena months prior to the actual concert date. it was their moment. a milestone (probably their biggest to date). and it was amazing to witness this in any possible way, whether it was by attending the concert or watching an ig livestream or keeping track of the photos and videos of that night

fandom: Stožice and Halloween outfits the chokehold both the Stožice and the Halloween (aka pilots and flight attendands) outfits had on the whole fandom... also love how we collectively agreed that Kris' Stožice outfit was his version of Princess Diana's revenge dress and how the Halloween outfits sent the fandom into a spiral in means of creations (fanart, fanfics etc)

November 2023

band: the whole touring well they did have a number of gigs during November and they seemed to be having so much fun 🥰 so much that at the end of November they announced their first proper european tour

fandom: collective screaming about things once again i mean all the gigs were feeding us well. the outfits alternating or not, Jance/Bokris moments, Bonace getting more spotlight (Bojan was and still is going through something during Demoni and Ona like wtf was he doing to Nace was it the serbian lyrics waking up something wild in him 😭😭😭). there was a lot going on back in November… honourable mentions: this Bokris moment, cvjetits (x x) and Kris riding Jure

December 2023

band: the whole Munich experience there's a good chance jo don't remember their whole stay in Munich for the first time as one of the best ones ever, especially if they think about the 1,5k euro taxi they paid as part of making it to The Hague in time for the next gig. but if anything, i feel like this captures their whole vibe as a band; ✨purely chaotic✨

fandom: european tour vlog and Bojan with the bi flag we waited for a long time for a Nordic tour vlog. maybe we didn't get it as an individual video but even as part of the whole tour vlog it was great and definitely worth the wait. also it was a great xmas gift let's be real 😌 now Bojan with the bi flag was probably not a very huge fandom moment and my bi ass may be biased here (this rhymed lol), but seeing him wrap himself with the bi flag followed by that speech before Barve Oceana in Barcelona will always be such a precious moment to me and i'll cherish it forever 💖 note: when i saw them last month in Munich i immediately started crying when i heard the first notes of Barve Oceana live; not only because i love the song and i finally heard it live, but also because i instantly thought of that moment of Bojan with the bi flag and the speech)

January 2024

band: Joker Out cooking livestreams London era my beloved (i never thought i'd say this about a city in the UK out of all places). their whole stay in London was an Experience both for the band and the fandom but well they got their chance to show the world they can cook besides playing music and they did. now let's not get into the kind of cooking they did, but the livestreams were very entertaining and bless them for doing them 😅

fandom: death by Damon Baker's photos yeah no i don't think i need to say more here, i'm still not over those photoshoots and i still can't quite believe they actually happened. like?????????? jo???? photographed individually or not by Damon fucking Baker???? ugh 😫 on that note i want to add that i loved and still love how those photos sparked the creativity in this fandom. from analyses of each photo to fanfics to fanart to creating anything in general. one of my favourite moments of the fandom <3

February 2024

band: release of Everybody's Waiting the whole road to the release of this single was Something with the band continuing the usual shenanigans and with Damon still releasing unseen photos of them. the release of it may have gotten us divided because of its language or the path they chose to take music-wise (it's not everyone's cup of tea and that's more than fine), but personally i like this for them. it's different, it showed a different side of them which they wanted to explored; they got a chances to do it and they did it. and you know what? it's so good live

fandom: death by Damon Baker's photos, Jure edition this could be merged with my fave fandom moment of January 2024 but this one is special because we just saw another Jure like WTF WAS THAT 😭 anyway i loved how we all kind of lost it when his photos dropped note: the moment Damon posted Jure's photos i was on my way to meet my friends in Dresden of all places and i was so shocked by what i saw i almost ran into a lighting column on the street 💀💀💀

March 2024

band: Jan and Bojan playing the piano at every gig of the tour i could've said the whole tour is my favourite thing from this March and it's not like it's not, this is a big moment for the band. it's just that once again i'm a bit biased here. many people, my pianist ass included, wished there would be a piano or some keyboard on stage during the tour because come on if Jan plays the keys for Everybody's Waiting studio version then why not do it live too? and you know what's better? not only there was a piano on stage for the whole tour, but not only Jan but also Bojan played it. however, Bojan playing it for Everybody's Waiting and Jan playing it for Padam, Metulji and the cases where they had special guests (like in Estonia with Alika, Lithuania with Monika and Belgium with Gustaph)... those were not on my bingo card and they were the most pleasant surprise ever 😌

fandom: meeting each other at the gigs when the tour started and even though i knew i would go to at least two gigs, i was extremely nervous because this meant i'd probably come across other fans from here and social media in general. as a person with anxiety, one of my worries was how i'd be perceived and how i'd manage to not come across as a snob person because i'm shy and scared to talk to people i don't know. as the tour went on and i saw people meeting each other irl after only knowing each other via tumblr/twitter/instagram, i got more nervous but also had a warm feeling in my chest because seeing people meet, bond over things they like and have fun at gigs together is actually very wholesome 🫶 i hoped i would get to experience this too at the italian gigs but i was still nervous. and then, around the middle of March, i made the spontaneous decision to do the Munich gig too, but instead of getting even more nervous i just got myself on autopilot. and i'm glad i did because if i hadn't i wouldn't have met some of you neither in Munich nor in Milan or Padua. i wouldn't get to trade stuff and joke about things and talk about fandom stuff or even about fanfics lmao 😂 anyway, point is that i most probably was worried about nothing. i got to meet so many people at the gigs and i had so much fun despite the inconveniences that may had showed up in the way (i don't wanna talk about it tbh) and everyone was so welcome and lovely i'll never shut up about it 😭 also i’m taking this opportunity to say that if we attended the same gigs but didn't get to meet, i'm so sorry about it really but we will do it at some point i'm telling you! and i also wish i get to meet more of you from in here so we can yap about things outside of tumblr too. btw i still have stickers to give away and i will make more whenever the time comes again <3

[wildpeachfarm]

Sorry I keep sending in asks LMAO but yeah I totally agree especially nowadays I think the fandom numbers and activity is fine on tumblr? It seems to be similar as before for me but on Twitter holy fuck is it like really really dead (at least the interactions are) I can’t tell if people are just more inactive or just don’t interact w art as much as before + dranart is like gone most of the month so my posts barely even hit likes and interactions as it did before which feels like a punch in the gut for sure I don’t want to sound ungreatful in ANY way btw hope I don’t sound like that😭😭 I think most artists and writers are going thru it rn I hear that their interactions keep getting dropped like 50% every week it’s so sad

I think it’s the fandom + the algorithm too cause I have NOT been seeing any dteam stuff on my tls just because I was inactive for a couple days which is wild like 😭

Many artists and writers are probably feeling down and struggling with numbers and self worth including myself so we just gotta push forward and wait for the drupload ig 💪💪 atp since everyone’s struggling just draw write whatever the fuck you want you know nobody gives a fuck in a good way if you think kinda positively ig haha

Also people on twt usually only interacting w mostly straight forward Cc art (in case of Dnf like them cuddling and kissing) like it’s cute yeah! But those seem to be the few art that people actually interact w which is sad too as an au based art acc LMAO but ig it is what it is and I need to deal w it

Sorry for the long rant GJSJFKA love you mokuuuu

ILY wolfy and yes you are so correct I really do think people especially on twitter need to get better with supporting artists and writers because I am especially seeing low rts. Dream fanart pivoting to liking random shitposts and tweets from stan accounts definitely killed their impact because now their likes hold very little importance AND we can't even see them any more 😭😭😭 so that also sucked and it just happened to be during a time where reach and sharing was low to begin with. Certainly hope that activity resumes with more content but idk I think ultimately we need to remind the fandom how much supporting others really helped everyone and uplifts the fandom "functionings"

[w2soneshots]

im sry if you keep writing stuff about jj but you're literally the only one who is writing for him rn 😭😭

so yeahhh ignore this if you want but can you please write where the reader is a youtuber and is doing a series where she pranks jj (or they prank each other like prank-war type thing idk). so the reader decides on a cheating prank with third person (i dont really mind who, could be in sidemen or troops). the reader and the person pretend to do IT on their bed before jj walks and he sees them then he gets all sad and mad and u can decide what happens after that im not rly sure lmao. preferably happy ending, tyyy love ur fics 💕💕

Prank -KSI

words: 0.6k+

warnings: angst, fake cheating, argument, self doubt.

summary: you perform a prank on JJ with Calfreezy and it goes terribly wrong.

notes: thank you for requesting!! I literally wrote this within an hour of your request because I love the idea so much (I’m only posting it now because I already posted something yesterday). Anyway hope you enjoy🫶🏼🤍

I've known JJ since we were teenagers. We started off as friends, moved to London together, I lived in the sidemen house for a little while and during that time we began dating. He asked me to be his girlfriend and we've been together ever since. I've been doing YouTube for as long as I can remember, that's how me and JJ became friends since not many people did YouTube at that time. I'm also great friends with the rest of the sidemen, Callux and Freezy.

Recently I've been doing a series on my channel where I prank JJ and he started doing it back. It started with little ones like: drawing a beard on him while he slept (because he can't grow one), then he bought a confetti bomb and scared the shit out of me with it. It continued on like that for a few weeks, me and JJ thought it was absolutely hilarious. Recently my comments have been full of people asking me to do a "cheating prank" so I decided to deliver.

I asked Freezy to do it with me since we've always got along well, he thought it would be funny so said yes. I asked him to come round to our apartment just before JJ was due to return home from a sidemen shoot. To make it look "real" but not actually touch each other we decided when we heard JJ open the front door Cal would make it look like he was quickly putting his clothes back on. I set up the camera so it was hidden but faced the bedroom door so it would catch JJ's reaction. Then me and Cal explained what was going to happen for the viewers.

When we heard the door click I jumped under the covers so my head was just peaking out and Cal rushed to take his top off. "y/n?!" JJ shouted through the apartment. I didn't respond. "y/n?" JJ opened the door just as Cal pulled his shirt back over his head. His face went blank as his eyes flickered from me and then back to Cal. "What the fuck are you doing!" He said stepping forward and harshly pushing Cals shoulder so he stumbled back slightly. I actually wasn't expecting him to believe it. I leaped up from the bed. "Woah, JJ it's a prank!" I stammered. His brows furrowed angrily. "Stop lying, I caught you!" He shouted. "No seriously mate, it's a prank." Cal stated. "Look." I lept around the bed to grab the hidden camera and held it up for him to see. His face calmed.

JJ shot a quick apology at Cal then he left, leaving me and JJ alone. We sat on the bed. I gently cupped his face in my hands. "Do you seriously believe I'd ever cheat on you?" I asked calmly. His eyes dropped to his lap but I brought his head higher so he looked me in the eyes. "I just- you're so amazing and I-" he started. I nodded my head telling him to go on. "I still can't believe someone like you would want to be with someone like me." My heart sank. "I love you so much. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you, and I never will." I said quietly. He pulled me into a hug and held me tight. "I'm sorry for reacting like that." He said into the crook of my neck. "No, I shouldn't have done the prank. I didn't think about the fact you might believe it, that was stupid of me." He pulled away "I love you." I smiled "I love you too."