#soooo weird that mountains is last for me omg

[yangjeongin]

ok on FIRST LISTEN. i think my ate track ranking is runners > chk chk boom > jjam > i like it > stray kids > twilight > mountains

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

It’s All In The Execution (S2, E1)

It happened. We got a second season. I’m living my best life...unfortunately Malcolm isn’t...

*** Content warning: brief mentions/allusions to depression, suicidal ideation, and Malcolm’s general poor mental health ****

SPOILERS AHEAD.

0:00 -  OH HELL YES. I can’t believe we actually got a second season! <3 My heart is so full. 

0:18 – “This ledge is taken.” …..ok so I have lots of feelings about this scene. 1) Malcolm’s lines are iconic in this scene and I love it. 2) WHY THE ACTUAL HELL WOULD JT, DANI, AND EDRISA AGREE TO LET A (LET’S BE HONEST) MAN IN A VERY BAD MENTAL STATE WITH A HISTORY OF DEPRESSION STAND ON A LEDGE FOR A CASE?!? Like seriously, Gil wouldn’t have gone with this shit. 3) As soon as I saw Malcolm on the ledge I believed he was seriously considering jumping. He showed passive suicidality most of last season and after Endicott – well I don’t blame him for being a little depressed. 

0:26 – Damn. Malcolm is really manic in this scene. It’s reminiscent of the pilot episode in the sense that Malcolm really has no filter. 

0:40 – Ok so Tom Payne deserves a freaking Emmy. This performance is gorgeous. Look at his facial expression when he says “It got real dark for me though. Family issues.” The look on his face completely convinces me that Malcolm is riding the struggle bus more than usual right now…..also am I the only one who thinks this ‘penthouse slasher’ is kind of unbelievable? He strikes me as too anxious and jumpy to be a serial killer. 

1:18 – Is Malcolm even trying to hide the fact that he knows what happened to Endicott?!? I mean “I tried to fight it” can’t JT and Dani hear his usual ‘projecting his personal issues on the suspect shtick?’ 

1:30 – Did he really just scream “I am the Surgeon’s son” from a ledge?!? Dude – someone please give this boy a hug and get him to Gabrielle – like last month.

1:40 – Soooo… now Chester isn’t scared of the ledge? He looked like he was going to wet himself from fear a literal minute ago. 

1:49 – OH OF COURSE CHESTER SLIT THEIR THROATS. JUST LIKE AINSLEY SLIT ENDICOTT’S. Chris Fedak really loves to inject Malcolm’s personal issues into the ‘serial killer of the week’.

2:23 – I’m sorry – the team let Malcolm on the ledge without tethering him first?!? No. No. No. I refuse to believe it. Dani, JT, and Edrisa care too much about Malcolm to let him do that.  

2:28 – Why is Edrisa even on this stakeout?!? Did she fill in as the 4th team member while Gil was in the hospital?!? I love Edrisa – she’s hilarious but the fact that she’s in the field like this is absolute nonsense. Hahaha 

2:32 – hahaha OMG. JT is like the big brother forced to hang out with his younger sibling and their weird friends. He’s think’s they’re all crazy but he’d also die for them.  

2:42 – Yikes. Malcolm is questioning his moral code. This boy is headed for a real nasty downward mental spiral if someone doesn’t intervene quickly.  

2:46 – Am I really supposed to believe that a rope tied to a radiator can hold the weight of two grown men dangling off a building?!? I mean – I’ll suspend my disbelief because I know it’s fictional entertainment but I found it really distracting.  

2:48 – JT. Would. Not. Let. Go. Of. That. Rope. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT. If for no other reason than because he loves GIL too much to let Gil’s surrogate son fall to his death. I understand why this happened – tension and excitement for television in the first scene of a new season but honestly – this whole first scene is wildly unrealistic given what we know about JT, Dani, Edrisa and their respective roles on the team.

2:50 – Can we talk about JT’s facial hair for a sec? I like him with it (and without it). Part of me thinks he grew it because he’s trying to channel Gil while he’s temporarily in charge of the team.  

3:08 – Honestly, the second Malcolm picked up his phone all I could think was “You moron. What if you drop that thing off the side of the building!?!?!”…then I remembered that he’s rich.

3:20 – “Please say it’s cancer.” Hahahahahaha OMG. I have a love/hate relationship for Malcolm with no filter. That’s freaking comedic gold. 

3:57 – “I’m hanging in there.” Tom Payne is freaking incredible. Look at his facial expression here. Malcolm’s emotional pain is etched on that face. Ugh. I’m love. 

4:02 – soooo no updated title screen. Interesting. 

4:08 – Istg the writers only put Ainsley in this scene so she would be in the episode. I mean honestly – what kind of precinct lets reporters with a camera crew INSIDE?!?! 

 4:15 – hahaha I love JT in this scene. I love how he initially looks at Ainsley with a mixture of confusion, resignation, and fear. This is a man who does not like the camera.  

4:16 – Side note: is it just me or is Ainsley acting very manic in this scene? Something about her energy reminds me of Malcolm circa 1x05 when he’s not sleeping and trying to convince everyone that he’s fine.

4:38 – hahahaha OMG. That wink.  

4:48 – Even Malcolm looks surprised that Ainsley and a camera dude were let into the precinct.  

5:00 – Ahhh the hand tremor. <3 Love that they’re still using that. 

5:05 – also Malcolm is heartbreaking in this scene. Someone give him a hug. Look at how hard he’s trying to hide his pain, fear, and trauma. UGH.  

5:33 -  So we finally get to see it. The moments immediately after 1x20. Or do we? I have this crackpot theory (I posted it on my main blog, so you might’ve already seen it – “AllTimeBouvier”) that these flashbacks are only a fraction of the truth. I think Sophie walked followed Malcolm from the vet’s office to the hospital, then home. I think she hid when she heard Endicott’s voice due to fear but came out after Ainsley started screaming and stabbing.  Besides – anyone else notice how the portion of these flashbacks where Malcolm is saying “Ainsley, focus on me. You didn’t do this. I did.” Only his right hand is ever in the frame. So it’s impossible to tell if he’s holding his cell (on the phone with Martin) with his left hand or if he just hung up and put the phone back in his pocket? I think that Martin either phoned Malcolm back or Martin heard Sophie’s voice and demanded to talk to her. I think Sophie disposed of the body while Malcolm took care of Ainsley like a good big brother. I think Sophie went into hiding and Martin is gaslighting Malcolm into believing that he disposed of Endicott’s body.  

5:37 – Anyone else want to know what happened to the murder weapon? And Ainsley’s bloody clothes? Just me? 

6:00 – hahahahaha Jessica is so extra. I love it. 

6:29 – Wait. What? Why was Ainsley quarantined with Jessica? Ainsley has her own apartment. If Jessica forced Ainsley to come and live with her during quarantine – why didn’t she also force Malcolm? This doesn’t track for me. 

6:40 – I love that Jessica brought Malcolm food (you can see the grocery bag behind Malcolm in one of the shots) and went so far as to actually lay out the breakfast ingredients for him. <3 I mean. It’s extra but it’s also sweet.  

6:45 – Why is Jessica looking at Malcolm’s pill bottles? Is it just to avoid eye contact with Malcolm while she talks about Gil? Is she noticing that his dosage has changed (she’s extra so I’m assuming she knows exactly what meds he takes and how much of each). Is that part of the reason why she’s suspicious of Malcolm? His dosage has gone up and he’s clearly trying to hide his pain?

 6:52 – I love how Malcolm interacts with Jessica in this scene. It’s so cute. They’re adorable. AND seeing Malcolm in casual clothing is always nice.  

7:44 – “Oh about that.” Damn. Malcolm really can’t catch a break. Poor baby. : ( 

7:50 – hahaha Martin looks like a mountain man here. Completely deranged and un-groomed.  

7:51 – Glad Mr.David isn’t dead or evil. I had fears.  

8:35 – The tension between Dani and Malcolm seems to have lessened since 1x20. The trust seems to have been partially rebuilt. Partially. Dani is still suspicious.  

8:38 – Well at least Malcolm’s still going to therapy.  

8:41 – GREEN SUIT. HELL YES.

9:06 – “The ‘Drise knows.” OMG hahahaha I love this show. Look at how Malcolm looks at her hahaha. 

9:17 – “I can fire these people right?” OMG. 10/10. JT REALLY SHINES IN THIS EPISODE. AND FRANK HARTS IS KILLING IT and the writers gave him so much well deserved screen time and great lines.  

9:53 – Malcolm and Edrisa getting excited about murder is honestly so freaking cute.  

10:34 – OMG. The way Malcolm perks up at the mention of rumours is hilarious. A learned behaviour from Jessica during his childhood? 

10:45 – I’ll say it again. Chris Fedak was wasting Frank Harts in season 1. This dude is shining in this episode. I hope they keep giving him more lines and screen time than they did last season. 

12:00 – I love seeing Malcolm this excited/happy but it’s pretty concerning that his passion is murder weapons.  

12:04 – This scene is really interesting to me for four reasons 1) Where the eff did Dani go? I guess she’s probably on her way to see Gil? 2) Even though Malcolm is getting excited about murder he’s way less manic than he was earlier this episode. 3) I love watching JT deal with Edrisa and Malcolm’s nerdy excitement. I could watch it all day. So fun. 4) I love watching JT and Malcolm in scenes together. Period. I can honestly say that watching their friendship evolve is one of the highlights of this show for me.  

12:30 – Heartbreaking. Malcolm had a few minutes where he forgot about Ainsley, Endicott, Martin, and the various traumas currently haunting him. Then he not only remembered but he saw Martin in himself. The crazy person collecting murder weapons. You can tell he feels embarrassed, ashamed, and sad. I genuinely believe that’s why JT says, “soooo weird.” with a look of sympathy and concern. JT doesn’t suspect that Malcolm has anything to do with Endicott’s murder at this point in time. Mark my words. 

12:55 – Edrisa gets Bright. I will never ship them together but I really hope they get more scenes together this season. Their friendship is beautiful. 

13:00 – Malcolm, baby, no. You don’t have to do this. Ugh. Poor baby. This is just going to make the night terrors worse. 

13:10 – They trimmed Martin’s beard but not his hair between the first scene in this episode and now. I think they just combed his hair? Why?!? Was this a Michael Sheen request? I must know!!! 

13:40 – hahaha OMG. Can we all just take a moment to appreciate how incredible Michael Sheen is?!? This man can go from downright terrifying to hilarious in a split second. Incredible actor.  

13:55 – Sooooo Mr. David doesn’t know about Endicott? Because he’s definitely heard Malcolm and Martin discuss some pretty sketchy stuff over the years. I’m pretty sure he heard about the Sophie stuff last season didn’t he? Why is Martin finally trying to hide something from Mr. David?  

14:03 – Look at Malcolm’s face. Ugh. He looks nauseous and scared. Someone hug him. Or better yet – get him away from Martin.  

14:18 – Sooooo is Jerry going to be a problem later? Martin ‘cures him’ later in this episode so will he be able to tell someone he heard Martin and Malcolm talking about Endicott’s murder? Would anyone believe him?  

14:40 – GO. TO. HELL. MARTIN. You’re not feeling it?!? Haven’t you caused enough emotional damage to your son. Stop. Trying. To. Manipulate. Malcolm.  

14:50 – Question 1000 about how Endicott’s body was disposed of: Where the hell did Malcolm get that yellow jumpsuit on such short notice? And….those gloves – anyone else notice that they’re practically the same as the gloves he puts on in Izzy’s sex dungeon in a few minutes? ALSO – THEY FOUND ENDICOTT’S BODY IN ESTONIA?!? LIKE ALL OF IT OR JUST PARTS OF IT? WOULDN’T IT BE SMARTER TO SCATTER HIS BODY IN MULTIPLE COUNTRIES IF IT’S ALREADY IN PIECES?!? Unless maybe Endicott’s body isn’t in pieces because we all know that Malcolm’s memory of traumatic events is fuzzy at best. 

15:07 – “Don’t. Say. That. Never, say that.” - I’m really proud of Malcolm here. He’s clearly in serious emotional distress throughout this whole conversation. He’s grappling with what he believes he did, what that means about him, his moral code, and his relationship with Martin. But yet – he found the strength to basically tell Martin to eff off.  

15:20 – AMAZING. Right after Martin says “Estonia?” there are a few seconds where it genuinely looks like Malcolm is going to cry. It’s moving as hell, heartbreaking, and some downright kickass acting. 

15:56 – Well, that’s not going to help Malcolm’s night terrors. But we definitely have confirmation that Jerry wasn’t as engrossed in the cartoons as Martin suggested.  

16:20 – I love this scene. Gil is the whole team’s surrogate father – not just Malcolm’s. Sometimes I forget that. Also – the fact that Chris Fedak waited 16 minutes to show us Gil Arroyo alive and well is a crime.  

16:28 – “He wouldn’t dare.” “I know.” How cute is this? Look at Dani’s smile. Ugh. I can’t decide if they know that JT doesn’t want Gil’s job because he loves working with Gil too much or he doesn’t like how much responsibility comes with Gil’s title. Probably a combination of both.  

16:35 – Sooo has Malcolm not been visiting Gil? I guess because of COVID he couldn’t but now he’s just not? I mean – Gil would be able to tell how Malcolm’s doing just by looking at him.  

17:05 – I’m sorry ‘multiple surgeries’?!? I want elaboration on this.  

17:09 – So I googled “British musician Izzy” and the top hit was the guitar player for Guns’n’Roses (who looks kinda like this guy). I have no idea what that means but I found it interesting. 

17:30 – Holy shit. Izzy is a nutcase. I love him. hahaha 

17:55 – Soooo Malcolm keeps a spray bottle of some sort of magic “show me the blood” water? Nah – the writers wrote it into the show for this scene’s convenience.  

18:05 – I love this. Malcolm’s nonchalant approach to his mother and Gil’s budding relationship. He’s like a little kid who doesn’t want to get his hopes up. He’s using the mentality of “If I don’t acknowledge it, it’s not happening. Therefore, if it goes wrong – I won’t get hurt by it.” It’s really sad and I wish he didn’t run away from something that will potentially be good but I also get it. 

18:06 – I also respect Malcolm a lot in this scene and am irritated by Dani. Look – they both adore Gil. They’re both protective of Gil (and in Malcolm’s case Jessica). Here’s where they’re different: Malcolm recognizes and respects that Gil and Jessica are adults who can make their own decisions. Dani doesn’t. Dani is acting like a preteen trying to break up Dad and the new step-mom she isn’t sure of. Dani and Malcolm both have their hearts in the right place but I disagree with Dani’s response to the relationship. I also understand where she’s coming from given what we know about Dani’s bio Dad.  

18:39 – It’s not supposed to be funny but holy hell. Malcolm putting his head on the floor to listen is hilarious.  

19:00 – I’m getting major John Watkins flashbacks. Malcolm breaks down a lot of walls where serial killers once hung out. Is that supposed to be some sort of subtle comment on Malcolm’s character? 

20:33 – Damn. Malcolm’s hair is long this season.  

20:55 – aannnnnd here are the murder gloves from the Endicott flashbacks. 

21:30 – Something about Malcolm dancing to this music in this supremely manic state is really upsetting to me. It just makes me uncomfortable.  

22:13 – I’m so worried about Malcolm right now. Holy hell. Get him to Gabrielle. NOW. 

23:00 – A skil saw. Pretty much a small version of what Malcolm thinks he dismembered Endicott with. Yikes. Fedak really loves making Malcolm project his issues on murder suspects.  

23:27 – Yep. Dani totally thinks Malcolm killed Endicott. She thinks he’s gone dark side and followed Martin’s footsteps. This is not going to be good for their friendship or the trust that they’re rebuilding.

23:50 – One of my favourite things about this show is that it can go from dark and creepy to family sitcom-esque drama in a second. It helps lighten the show’s tone a little. I mean honestly – most of the fans are here for the family drama as opposed to the ‘killer of the week’ storyline anyways. 

24:10 – I love this. Jessica admitting to Malcolm that she and Gil have been discussing him for almost 25 years. You can see that Malcolm is 1) a little freaked out and 2) a little touched. For a moment you can see how badly he wants Gil and his Mom to have a long-lasting romantic relationship.  

24:32 – OMG. Why did Jessica call Ainsley about Malcolm’s mental state before calling Malcolm? Is that standard Whitly family practice? I have questions. 

24:40 – Yep. Dani is Concerned and Scared.  

26:46 – Sooo we all agree that Martin was trying to electrocute Jerry to death right? I mean “You really shouldn’t have done that Jer-bear.”?!?!  And he’s literally a serial killer?! 

27:25 – Mr. David is having none of Martin’s bullshit – so how did Martin get away with it? What does Martin have on Mr. David? 

27:50 – “A miracle.” Omg. Hahahaha. I love this show. So. Much. 

28:09 – “clearing her brother’s name. Not murder.” Seriously, the parallels between this case and Malcolm’s personal issues are more obvious than usual this episode. Almost to the point where I’m annoyed that the other characters aren’t really catching on.  

28:35 – “What happened, his brain break?” I love the way JT can simultaneously tease and be concerned about Malcolm. Ugh. It’s beautiful (and hysterical). 

29:07 – Not again. Please stop putting JT in front of the camera. I’m getting second-hand embarrassment and anxiety on his behalf. It hurts to watch (funny too, but mostly painful). 

29:19 – Look at Gil. Hahaha he’s so amused by JT’s awkwardness in front of the camera – but you can also see how proud he is. <3 I love papa!Gil.  

29:33 – “Police work is patience.” Cute 1x05 callback. And can we all just take a minute to appreciate how much Gil loves Dani. Just look at his proud Dad face!! <3 Warms my cold, dead heart. 

30:00 – Oh yeah, Dani is suspicious.  

30:04 – I love how Gil seems to be the only person who truly understands Malcolm and all his quirks. <3 I love how much Gil loves Malcolm. <3 I just…ugh. <3 <3 <3 • 30:11 – “I’m a good big brother.” That line cut through my heart. He shouldn’t have been put in this position – choosing between his moral code and his brotherly instincts. It’s not fair and the stress of it is literally killing him.  

30:17 – “Messed them up.” Them!?!? I’m sorry Dani, when did you and Gil start talking about Malcolm AND Ainsley?!? Last I checked this was a 100% Malcolm conversation. …she’s not wrong though. 

30:33 – “There’s nothing we haven’t talked about.” I love what that suggests. To me – that means they when Dani has a bad break up, they talk about stupid stuff like what they’re cooking for dinner and songs that make them happy. I love that it suggests that Dani and Gil have talked about Jackie. Malcolm might be Gil’s fake-son but Dani is sooo Gil’s fake-daughter. <3 I can just see him getting all overprotective when she gets a new boyfriend even though he knows damn well that Dani is more than capable of taking care of herself – he can’t help it, Dani is his little girl. <3 <3 <3 

31:00 – Ugh….ok. So this scene. I’ve seen a lot of mixed reactions about it. I have a bit of a mixed reaction myself tbh. On one hand, I love that they have the type of relationship where they can openly discuss this. On the other hand – it feels forced and it really rubs me the wrong way. Dani is just way out of line here. She’s totally attacking Jessica and Gil is kind of letting her? I mean I think it upsets me so much because Gil isn’t even really defending Jessica.  Also, that line about Jackie thinking the Whitly’s are cursed?!? Wtf is that?!? No. No. We know that Jackie loved Malcolm like a son. Jessica has said that Jackie was kind. What is this cursed nonsense?!?!? I refuse to believe it. And the fact that Jessica heard it all breaks my heart. Like – it physically hurts me to watch this scene for all of the above reasons. But I also kind of understand why we got the scene – to further explore the Gil+Dani dynamic and to add some angst to the Jessica/Gil romance.  

33:00 – Oh hell yes. I love this danger. 

34:10 – Amazing how calm Malcolm is while the killer is literally going through his murder weapon collection. Like he hasn’t been this calm all episode? 

35:10 – Ahhhh here’s manic!Malcolm. 

35:25 – “Is it my hair?” Okay so totally hilarious, but Dani is listening to this. Can she tell that Malcolm is clearly (and weakly) deflecting the comment about him being a killer like Martin? 

35:40 – Malcolm is scared. :( Someone please hug him. This is the most honest he’s been all episode. My heart is broken.  

36:20 – Soooo did Malcolm just abstractly tell Dani that he’s a justice killer? Nahhhh I’m totally typing out of my ass.  

37:00 – He was on the Harvard fencing team?!? Why is that adorable? 

37:34 – Malcolm just cut a dude 3x. No remorse. No more fear. He’s calm. I’m terrified. Does he like hurting the killer?  

37:50 – I think Dani suspects that Malcolm killed Endicott. Yep. Definitely. 

38:00 – Gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous. This scene with JT and the cops is heart-wrenching. The fact that Dani and Malcolm come to his rescue is beautiful. The fact that JT is clearly terrified but not angry is perfect. I hate that this scene had to be made but I love how it was executed.  

38:31 – Look at Malcolm’s confused, white, rich face here. He genuinely can’t believe that cops just racial profiled one of the only good people who ever accepted a serial’s killer’s son as a friend.  

38:40 – I’m crying. JT’s fear (and Frank Harts’ acting) is so believable and completely haunting. I hear the subtext in this scene, “What if those cops killed JT? What would happen to his pregnant wife and unborn child?”, “How is JT going to financially support his family if he loses his job unfairly?”, “How messed up is it that a literal military veteran is terrified of fellow police officers?”. 

38:44 – “You didn’t do anything wrong.” This line gives me hope. Malcolm isn’t too far gone. Malcolm still knows right from wrong and he still has a heart of gold. 

38:55 – Ok. I LOVE that Gil magically shows up in this scene. BUT HOW DID HE KNOW TO COME TO THE PRECINCT?!?! LIKE WTF? Because Malcolm and JT look surprised to see Gil. Dani just looks relieved – did she call Gil?  

39:10 – Gil is an absolute A+ human being. I love him. I will die for him.

39:33 – OMG. JT’s big watery puppy dog eyes have ripped my heart to shreds. <3 :( 

39:45 – When I first saw this I thought Malcolm was hurt by Gil’s “and whatever Bright is”. But upon re-watching it – Malcolm looks surprised and so so touched. I’ll be honest – I don’t think Malcolm’s mental state would be so bad right now if he had had regular contact with Gil throughout COVID. Gil is Malcolm’s rock. His literal example of what a good man looks like – without him during a traumatic time Martin creeps back into Malcolm’s psyche.  

40:15 – Sooo Martin is still definitely lying to Malcolm.  

40:20 – Stupid little thing – there never used to be a toilet on Jerry’s side of the room. And what happened to all of Martin’s books and stuff? Did Claremont put it in storage? I mean he’s a serial killer? Jessica certainly didn’t store it for him. 

40:37 – Amazing. As soon as Malcolm physically sees Gil he comes to Martin with a renewed faith in his moral code. (“I stop killers. I don’t help them.”) 

41:30 – “Please don’t torture yourself for that.” Martin is right BUT that’s also why I hate him. Martin is manipulating Malcolm right now. He’s trying to convince Malcolm that he genuinely cares and loves his children. Thus destabilizing further Malcolm’s mental state.  

41:36 – Also – both Tom Payne and Michael Sheen are acting their asses off here. *chef’s kiss* 10/10. I love to see it.  

41:45 – Aaaannnnd there’s Martin the asshole. Completely screwing with Malcolm’s mind. Again. What a dick. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.  

42:00 – Look at how scared Malcolm is. I genuinely think Malcolm (whether or not he actually dismembered Endicott, I suspect he didn’t) feels good when he remembers doing it. This is BAD for Malcolm’s mental health. Yikes. : ( Poor baby.  

Ok. So that’s the first episode of season 2. I really liked it. It wasn’t perfect but I’m excited for what this season might bring. Be back next week.  

[mousehole5000]

 this is it... the final post.... 226 through THE END!!!!!

this shit with mu qing and the river of lava is SOOOO dramatic im loving it

oh my god theyre on a FUCKING bridge of course they are okay let’s go boys

“You’re right. We’re alike. You think me odd, I think you to be rather weird too.” - so what im getting from this is that xie lian and mu qing are the only characters in this book with working gaydar okay yup got it this checks out

god... the fact that xie lian is ready to be like “look mu qing we can just forget about the past it doesnt matter we dont have to be friends i know you dont like me but im not gonna let you die over it” and then mu qing is like “.... god i really do admire you huh”

“You...certainly...are rather amazing. You’re...also...a better person...than me. Long story short, I...very much wanted...to become your f-f-friend.”  - going to think about this for the rest of all time im about to become utterly unintelligible im overcome with emotions

“And, at the end of the white silk band, Feng Xin was gripping Ruoye with one hand while the other was holding on to a steel-faced Mu Qing, and he shouted towards him.” - the fucking IMAGE of this im gonna cry this is everything i could have asked for im so happy also mu qing dangling there like “ welp. guess ill live“

“Feng Xin was almost burnt by that pillar of fire, and he shouted in outrage. “WHAT’S WITH THIS BAND OF DOG SHITS, ATTACKING PEOPLE WHILE THEY’RE DOWN, SO VILE! FUCK YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY!” Xie Lian responded, “IF THEIR ENTIRE FAMILIES ALL LOOK LIKE THAT, YOU SURE YOU WANT TO FUCK THEM??” - theyre so funny!!! and theyre best friends!!! theyre joking together now in the middle of all this i could cry theyre back!!!

“Using sticks as arrows, he held the bow with one hand and used his teeth to bite back the bowstring.” - no clue how practical this is but okay archer boy. hot

i actually have so many little quips between the three of them highlighted but we’d be here all night if i included them all. im literally so delighted by this omg worth the wait

“Each sabre strike slashed to the bone. It wasn’t like Xie Lian had never seen Hua Cheng use the sabre before in the past, but his style had always been easy and leisurely, nonchalant and casual. Rather than say he was handling a weapon, it was more like he was toying with a small knife. Yet those blade marks were filled with killing intent. It was easy to imagine just how skilled the one exchanging blows with him was, and how perilous this battle.” you have no idea how mad i was when i read this and thought we missed witnessing the fight between hc and jw omg

“Behind him, Feng Xin muttered, “Dear fucking god, may all the gods and buddhas grant their blessings, that better absolutely be Crimson Rain Sought Flower, otherwise he’s gonna go mad!” “Stop your rubbish,” Mu Qing berated. “We’re all the gods and buddhas ourselves and we can’t grant shit, just keep up with him! Look at the stumbling way he’s running, he’s gonna trip and fall to his bloody death before he even sees the man!” - okay i know i said no more quips but this is literally too funny i just wanted to read it again

“ However, for whatever reason, that vicious ghost, in its muddled state, took that large group of live mortals under its wing and fled for many days. In the end, they were still surrounded by millions of ghosts, trapped in a dead end, and it was going to be eaten along with those humans.” [...] “That vicious ghost almost made a move against those humans, but for some reason, in the end, it didn’t. It instead used one of its own eyes as the price to forge a blood weapon. That vicious ghost was already forcibly hanging on with its last breath; after digging out its eye it should’ve broken apart completely. Yet somehow something had shocked it, and it instead woke to its senses completely. “ - THIS IS AMAZING ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? IS THIS ALL WE GET ABOUT HIS GHOSTLY LORE?????? HUA CHENGGGGGGGG

“What a terrible offence, his old habit had come out, and he quickly apologized. “I’m sorry! You don’t have to listen to me!” Hua Cheng, however, only smiled happily. “Everything gege tells me is the best advice, so why wouldn’t I listen?” - this isnt the fucking time afjdkfjsdkl they really never stop

“So you can hold the illusion of a perfect Crown Prince of Wuyong to face and dismiss the Jun Wu now. Isn’t that your objective? Did you think I don’t know what you’re thinking?” “THAT’S NOT IT!” Guoshi cried. “Stop getting tied up in right and wrong, victories and defeat, I’VE NEVER THOUGHT THAT WAY BEFORE!” - jun wu only being able to see xie lian as his successor and believing that thats all anyone else sees too... okay

honestly this whole final showdown was a blast i cant put everything in but it was so much fun to read. the DRAMA the LAVA the SHOUTING t

“Hua Cheng had poured too much spiritual power into him. There really was too much, so much that it was completely outside the amount the cursed shackle could withstand.” - okay.... okay... the love you give will set you free... okay....

“With Jun Wu in his grip, he carried both their bodies and forcefully slammed into the incomparably-solid rock wall! He used all of his power in this smash, and in the rumbling and crashing of rocks, he also heard the sound of something breaking.” [...] “A moment later, Jun Wu suddenly asked, “That move. What is it called?” “...” Xie Lian raised his sleeve and wiped away the blood on the side of his face. “Shattering boulders on the chest.” YES!!!!! YES!!!!! xie lian actually lived that life!!!!!! i loved this detail so much

“After a moment of silence, Xie Lian took off the bamboo hat carried on his back, took it in his hand, and covered it over Jun Wu’s face.” - xie lian... good... another detail i love. a hat that protects from the rain, given in a moment of need, even to someone who has caused you hardship... we do not forget the kindness granted to us

“There was gratefulness, there was shame, there was heartache, there was wild joy, but above all else, there was incurable love.” - :pleading: i wish it was just that easy tbh. “i have to tell you about the worst parts of myself” “ive already seen them and i dont care i still love you“ truly the dream

“ It’s been so long since anyone listened to me talk, won’t you stay? Don’t...actually do this. I won’t be able to take it. Twice, it’s been twice already! I really don’t want there to be a third time!!!” - the bit about just wanting someone to listen to him talk... xie lian... :(

emily corpse bride moment.... i knew it had to happen.... butterflies.... death and rebirth.... inevitable

xianle trio bickering about ruoye..... mu qing complaining but not letting anyone else fix it... im so happy

“The Rain Master sat down on the spot, looking like she was going to perform a passing service for her. After all, Xuan Ji was the only one left of the Kingdom of Yushi besides herself.”  - xuan ji you sure the hell were... a character. this little moment tho..... yushi huang... many thoughts

“ Who hasn’t made promises, or swore to the mountains and the seas when they were young? Talking of affection, of love, of forevers. But, the longer I hang around in the world, the more I understand, something like ‘forever’ is impossible. It’s never going to be possible. Having it once was already good enough. No one can truly achieve it. I don’t believe in it anymore.” - jian lan im happy for you bummer it didnt work out with feng xin but yeah that was looooong ago. also this quote me same mood kin but its chill. having it once was already good enough

although yeah tbh if theres anyone who can have a forever like that... it would be a ghost and a god

fasdfjadklfj GOD... pour one out for ling wen.. but is that not the truth of this world? the one can be pardoned for being good at paperwork that no one else wants to do? isnt that the plot of the shawshank redemption?

okay but the fact that all xie lian’s friends come to visit him while he waits for hua cheng is making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.... fengqing coming together to try to get him out of the house but get scared off by his cooking... amazing

“Last time, they spent eight hundred years running towards each other. This time, it only took an instant to fall into each other’s embrace.” - im completely unaffected by this. im not lying i swear (i am lying im very emotionally affected)

okay i love this final wrap up chapter party its so fun. mu qing moving on from the broom thing!!! good for him!! the beggars get their reward!!! the fun ghost city chefs!! SQX!!!! and he xuan is?? here too??? he’s hungry??? fjadlkfjsdl

“The grounds that Feng Xin and Mu Qing had just swept were once again filthy from that giant crowd of muddy feet. Mu Qing gripped his broom, looking like he felt someone had infected him with fleas, and his eyes were wide.” - me when my dad comes into the kitchen when ive just finished washing dishes i get it king

the little folklore bit... fun!!! oh my god its over..... :(

that was really fun i had a blast reading it and on the whole really liked it i WISH soo badly that hua cheng had gotten more outside of being cunty and devoted even tho those are both important i just wish there was more about like how he got by during those 800 years and like did he ever have doubts? what shaped his worldview was it all xie lian or was it his experience as a mortal as well? why is he so mean to e’ming? theres bits and pieces here and there and i know it was already SO long but that really would have been great if there was more about hc cuz tbh by the end, at least for me, the hualian relationship didnt actually feel as fleshed out as the xianle trio relationship like i still liked hualian’s dynamic and it was really sweet how much they clearly really liked each other and  everything but i kind of wish some of the other subplots had been dropped or diminished in favor of more hc development i think that would have been cool

but anyway thats some of my thoughts and i really did enjoy the hell out of book 5 that was a riot and uhhh thanks to everyone who read these or commented *lends you spiritual energy through a high five*

[alienshea]

And now, for no absolute reason, I will give every Gorillaz song from the main 6 studio albums my rating from 1-10

Self-Titled

Re-Hash: 7.5/10

Bopping tune, 2D doing his own backup vocals make me swoon, Noodle is great as always, no one really knows what the lyrics are but they’re valid

5/4: 6/10

Better than average,not the best song i’ve ever heard but still pretty good, kinda uncomfy with Noodle screaming about someone turning her dad on, drumbeat makes me wanna dance, wished they couldve made the music video

Tomorrow Comes Today: 7/10

The kind of song that gets stuck in your head all day, love the overall sad tone, music video makes me laugh now bc that one murdoc gif, makes me cry when i have depressive episodes

New Genius (Brother): 7.5/10

Love 2D’s voice in it, lyrics hit home a little bit for me, have never skipped this song tbh, overall pretty good song

Clint Eastwood: 8.5/10

I literally know all the words, I love the rap, iconic, there’s a reason it’s popular, Del is everything

Man Research (Clapper): 3/10

oooo boy i’m gonna get shit for this one, i always skip this song, i can’t stand the whole “yeah yeah” thing, the only great part about this song is the “tHiS Is a bReAkFaSt ClUuUuuUB!”

Punk: 6.5/10

gets me turnt, toooooo short, tbh i like any song where 2D yells

Sound Check (Gravity): 9/10

looooove this song, gives me body chills when the drums kick in, love the deep ass voice, overall emo kid bop

Double Bass: 8/10

nice jam, I like listening to this when I do homework or art, relaxing

Rock The House: 8/10

legit makes me get up and dance, great rhythm, music video is beautiful

19/2000: 9/10

amazing bop, gets me pumped, iconic af, first gorillaz song i ever heard and first music video i ever saw, n o o d l e

Latin Simone: 7/10

I don’t speak spanish so i cant really sing along, love the feel of it, will listen on repeat, prefer the english version but im biased

Starshine: 6.5/10

idk I don’t really listen to this one, not a bad song i just wouldn’t play it on repeat or actively look for it, i do like the vocals

Slow Country: 8.5/10

love the feeling this song gives me, kinda like im just floating, super chill song to get high to, have never skipped this song, i like the lyrics

M1A1: 8/10

super fun song to sing along with, honestly the best song they couldve ever chosen to start a concert, he   s c r e a m

OVERALL SCORE FOR SELF-TITLED: 7.5 (rounded up)

Demon Days

Last Living Souls: 9/10

absolute favourite song on the album, breakdown gives me chills, constantly changing it’s tune and i love it, the basssss <3

Kids With Guns: 6/10

I love singing the chorus, great song to have in the background, chill af

O Green World: 7.5/10

i love the instrumental of this one, vocals give me chills, kinda wish you could hear the singing more tho

Dirty Harry: 6.5/10

bopping beat, i love the rap part, overall not really the type of song i’d play on repeat but not bad

Feel Good Inc: 8/10

first and foremost the fucking bass of this song is the reason i’m learning bass, chorus gives me chills, kinda overused but i understand

El Manana: 6/10

kind of a meh song for me personally, not a bad one just not the greatest

Every Planet We Reach Is Dead: 9/10

banger, the reason im also learning guitar, vocals are on point, has made me cry before

November Has Come: 7/10

love the chorus, rap is kinda meh for me, i like the beat

All Alone: 5/10

not really a song i listen to, i like the bloopy noises

White Light: 4/10

I always skip this one tbh, better than man research but not by much

DARE: 6.5/10

this song haunts my dreams, its like the best kind of elevator music, on another note you fucking go noodle

Fire Coming Out Of The Monkey’s Head: 7.5/10

I WANNA BE A COWBOY BABY, narrative is really fucking good tho

Don’t Get Lost In Heaven: 8/10

beautiful, usually dont like gospel-esque music but i love this, gives me chills

Demon Days: 6.5/10

not my favourite tbh, meh for me

OVERALL SCORE FOR DEMON DAYS: 6.5 (rounded up)

Plastic Beach

Welcome to the World of the Plastic Beach: 7.5/10

i love snoop dogg, also this song gives me good vibes

White Flag: 5/10

ehhhh not a fan of this one, i usually skip it, i like the orchestra tho

Rhinestones Eyes: 8.5/10

i fucking love this song, great tune great vocals, i never skip it, i even got my boyfriend to start loving this song even tho he doesnt really like gorillaz

Stylo: 9/10

jesus this song, makes my heart hurt, i absoultely long singing along to this, his voiceeeee, bobby womack!

Superfast Jellyfish: 8.5/10

quirky af, i love de la soul in this one a lot, have never skipped this

Empire Ants: 9/10

so beautiful, has made me cry, both of their voices are so soft and lovely ugh

Glitter Freeze: 6/10

starts off strong but when it starts sounding like a drill i usually yeet out

Some Kind Of Nature: 8/10

used to be my favourite until i started listening to the album more, 2d’s part is so soulful omg

On Melancholy Hill: 8.5/10

so sad and amazing, music video is probably my favourite, is me and my best mate’s “song”

Broken: 9/10

ugh beautiful, i know all the words and always sing them loud af, has never skipped this song, honestly is everything

Sweepstakes: 5.5/10

not a big fan, i usually skip this one, not a horrible song just not for me

Plastic Beach: 7.5/10

love it, better at the beginning than the end, still a bop

To Binge: 10/10

WHEEEW BOY, i love this song, its so sad and amazing and gay jesus christ, the best thing murdoc has ever done

Cloud of Unknowing: 7/10

soulful and beautiful, again bobby womack!!

Pirate Jet: 7/10

i love the tune bc it gets me feeling ~spooky~, lyrics dont really make sense but thats okay

OVERALL SCORE FOR PLASTIC BEACH: 7.5 (rounded up)

The Fall

Phoner to Arizona: 8/10

gets me bopping and grooving, great music to play in the background while writing or doing art, my go to for when i draw or need background sound while I relax

Revolving Doors: 9.5/10

OOF, it so sad and it makes me feel things, i scream the lyrics errytime

Hillbilly Man: 10/10

fell in love with this the second I heard it, has been my favourite song of all time for over 2 years now, will never skip it in my life, i yearn to learn the guitar 

 Detroit: 6.5/10

generally a good happy bop, usually play it as background sound

Shy-Town: 6/10

nice to the ear, i don’t really like the prerecorded vocals of 2D but when Damon sung it live it sounds much better

Little Pink Plastic Bags: 8/10

i love it ugh, relaxing af, will never skip

The Joplin Spider: 9/10

big love for this song, its just soooo goooood

The Parish Of Space Dust: 7.5/10

big cowboy energy, sounds so sweet, 2D’s voice is unnnf

The Snake In Dallas: 7/10

good for when you wanna party but you’re depressed and can only stay in bed, love the little robotic sounds

Amarillo: 9.5/10

i meeeean what can i say, this song is so sad and gay and beautiful, ive cried while listening it this, will never skip

The Speak It Mountains: 7.5/10

this track is really weird and creepy and kind of not a song but i adore it anyway

 Aspen Forest: 8/10

beautiful sounds, the piano is so soothing, will play this on repeat while i zone out

Bobby In Phoenix: 9/10

i wanna cry every single time i hear this bobby come back

California and the Slipping of the Sun: 7.5/10

this song so so pretty and i cry every time ugh, he sounds so fed up im sorry pretty boy

Seattle Yodel: ???

what

OVERALL SCORE FOR THE FALL: 8 (rounded down)

Humanz

Ascension: 8.5/10

absolute banger, i get pumped everytime this comes on, skys falling bb

Strobelite: 7.5/10

i used to hate this song but then the music video came out and i tried it again and now i love it dont @ me

Saturnz Barz: 9/10

theres so much i could say about this song ans the mv unf

Momentz: 9/10

banger, i dance like a maniac every time i hear it, will never skip

Submission: 8/10

gives me a good chance to work on high notes, makes my skin tingly

Charger: 8.5/10

2D’s voice is so griity and i can help myself

Andromeda: 8.5/10

I’ve never skipped this song, has made me cry, makes me dance

Busted And Blue: 9/10

has made me cry several times, vocals are everything, will never skip

Carnival: 7/10

is a bop, don’t really listen to it much anymore but it’s alright

Let Me Out: 8/10

i love it, one of my favourites to rap with

Sex Murder Party: 4/10

ehhh dont like this one, i always skip it

She’s My Collar: 8.5/10

i dont want to admit the things 2D’s voice in this makes me wanna do

Hallelujah Money: 7.5/10

hated this at first, grew to love, very soothing

We Got The Power: 9.5/10

gets me FUCKING PUMPED, we do got the power fuckers

OVERALL SCORE FOR HUMANZ: 8.5 (rounded down)

The Now Now

Humility: 8.5/10

summer bop, makes me wanna dance, have never skipped

Tranz: 9.5/10

i love singing along to this bc it makes me feel sexy oops, always screams the lyrics

Hollywood: 7/10

not a huge fan of this but ill listen to it, favourite part is the chorus, also snoop doggy dogg

Kansas: 9/10

oof this song makes me cry, i always scream this 

Sorcererz: 7.5/10

ooo them vocals thooo, makes me relaxed

Idaho: 8.5/10

i love this song sm, one of my favourites of all time to sing, i wanna learn the guitar for this

Lake Zurich: 8/10

I love to listen to this while relaxing or writing, makes me wanna dance, COWBELL

Magic City: 8.5

always dancing to this, billboards on the moooon

Fireflies: 10/10

yall saw this coming, i always cry, its so somber, in close competition w HillBilly Man for my all time favourite

One Percent: 6.5/10

only song on the album i would skip and it isnt even that bad

Souk Eye: 10/10

its so gay and sad i love it sm

OVERALL SCORE FOR THE NOW NOW: 8.5 (rounded up)

So after months of me saying i’d rate the songs in order I finally did! Now keep in my the overall scores are averages, my personal rating for each album is:

Self-Titled: 8/10

Demon Days: 7/10

Plastic Beach: 8.5/10

The Fall: 8/10

Humanz: 7.5/10

The Now Now: 9/10

thanks for reading, i did this so i wouldn’t have to write an essay oops! <3

[flyfireflyfly]

Dor

Dor: (romanian) the feeling of longing, craving, or yearning for someone or something, combined with sadness.

Length warning: 3462 words

Youngjae closed the door to his apartment before leaning against it and sighing heavily. He closed his eyes, relishing the relaxing silence. His body started protesting though so he straightened and kicked his shoes off. After flipping on the lights, he shuffled over to the couch and collapsed on it. Finally he felt some relief against the soreness in his body. At that moment, his stomach growled, but it seemed like too much effort to get himself some dinner. Lying on the couch was a much better idea. Except for maybe a hot bath... Or eating dinner while taking a hot bath... Youngjae sat up and started to climb off the couch when his phone went off. He dug it out of his pocket and saw a text notification on the screen. Clicking on it, he furrowed his eyebrows at the unknown phone number. Then he read through the message. 'I finally did it. I confronted him about the lies and the late nights. He started yelling at me. Stuff about not trusting him like usual.' He gaped at his phone, not sure of what to make of the message. It was definitely sent to him by accident. Hitting the reply button, he began to type back that the person had the wrong number. Before he could finish though, another message came through. 'I did start crying, but I didn't back down this time. Then he started screaming at me that it was my fault that he cheated on me. He said it was over, packed a bag, and left.' Youngjae frowned at that. Sounded like this guy was a real piece of work. 'Now I feel like shit. Maybe I should have just kept my mouth shut.' That was all he could take. He hastily typed out a message and sent it. 'You shouldn't. It sounds like you did the right thing, and that guy is a complete asshole.' Then he waited and after a moment, received another text.

'Thanks. I still feel bad though.' This was going to take a lot more intervention Youngjae realized. 'You're only feeling heartbroken right now cause the relationship ended. Once you finish dealing with that, you'll realize how much better off you are.' After hitting send, he mentally smacked himself. What was he doing? 'And actually, you have the wrong number. But I meant what I said. That asshole obviously doesn't care about you or respects you as a person at all. There's never a reason to cheat and you shouldn't have to put up with it.' Waiting once more, Youngjae sat there staring at his phone. A minute went by before he let out a sigh. He tossed his phone on to the coffee table and leaned back against the couch. Glancing around, he once more noted the quietness of his apartment. It wasn't quite as relaxing anymore though, and it somehow made his heart feel heavy. Perhaps he should just take a quick shower and go to bed. Prepare for another long day at work. Suddenly the cell phone went off, causing him to jump a little. Then he hurriedly grabbed it. 'OMG! I'm so sorry! This is so embarrassing, I could just die. Sorry again. I won't bother you anymore.' A grin formed on his face and he chuckled. 'No, it's fine. Promise. You're not bothering me and it seems like you needed someone to talk to. And you really did the right thing. Don't even think about taking him back!' Then as an afterthought, he messaged, 'My name is Youngjae by the way.' He held his breath, ignoring the growling from his stomach. Then he received a text and he was grinning again. He read her name over and over, committing it to memory. 'Ugh I'm still so embarrassed though! Talking to a complete stranger about my breakup.' Youngjae chewed on his lip as an idea came to him. 'My back and my legs hurt. I haven't even eaten dinner. My boss made me stay late, again. He's such an asshole. Wait... WERE YOU DATING MY BOSS?? That jerk! I'll superglue his seat!' 'Omg bwhahahahahaha!!' she replied back. Laughing as well, he quickly typed out, 'There. Now I ranted to you about my day. We're even. And now I'm not a stranger, we're friends.' 'Friends? Hmmm.... that means I can yell at you... GO GET SOMETHING TO EAT! Seriously, what are you thinking? Do you know what time it is? GO!' Youngjae's face fell and he blinked at those words in surprise. Then he busted out laughing and stood up. 'Wow! Ok, ok I'm going!' He went to the kitchen and opened one of the cupboards to grab a bag of ramen, just as his phone beeped. 'And it better be something good! Not ramen!' His mouth dropped open. That was one hell of a coincidence. 'Wait... How did... DID YOU PUT CAMERAS IN MY APARTMENT???' 'OMG LOL!!!' Shaking his head and chuckling, Youngjae put the ramen back and searched through the cupboard for something else. When he got the next text message though, he was surprised once again. 'Ok, confession.' she wrote, followed by a picture of a bowl of ramen. "Oh that little..." Youngjae's fingers flew across the phone's keyboard. 'You rascal! That's it, I'm eating ramen!' Then he promptly grabbed the package of ramen, and then a pot to cook it in. He filled the pot with water and set it on the stove. 'Now you have to wait for the water to boil... And then for then for the noodles to cook... And ohhhh this is soooo goooood. So yummy.' 'Is this what it means to be friends with you? Torturing me?' 'Yes.' she instantly replied, along with a smiling emoji. Laughing again, he leaned against the counter with a huge smile on his face. While waiting for the water to boil, he continued texting back and forth with his new friend.

A loud thump made Youngjae jump and he quickly looked at the stack of folders on his desk. "These accounts need to be done before tomorrow." He looked up at his boss. "Uh... Yes sir." Then watched as the man dismissively walked away. Biting his tongue to stop himself from swearing, Youngjae grabbed the folder off the the top. He slapped it down on his desk and opened it before glancing around for a pen. When he didn't find one, he opened the desk's drawer. His gaze zeroed in on a small bottle of super glue, nestled in a pile of paper clips and rubber bands. Memories of last night came to him and a small smile came to his face. He hesitated for a few moments, then grabbed his phone. He pulled up the newest contact in his phone, reading her name a few times. 'My boss is making me stay late again and there's superglue in my desk.' 'Omg, no! Don't. You'll get in so much trouble. Do you really want to lose your job? It sucks but it's a paycheck. Don't do anything you'll regret.' Youngjae quietly chuckled and set his phone aside. He began to look over the paperwork when his phone signaled a new message. Curious, he picked up his phone to see another text from her. 'Doooooo iiiittttttttttt!!!!!' followed by a devil emoji. He hurriedly slapped a hand over his mouth to stop himself from laughing, letting out an odd, muffled sound instead. When he finally felt in control, he took his hand off of his mouth and went back to work. Though he wasn't laughing, he couldn't stop smiling.

Youngjae closed the front door behind him and kicked off his shoes. Out of habit, he checked his phone for any messages. There were none. Weeks had passed by since he had started talking to her. It had gotten to the point that they would text each other every day. But then she had said would be going for the weekend to the mountains with a couple of friends for the weekend. There wouldn't be much reception so she would text him when she got back. He set his phone down on the coffee table with a sigh. Glancing around his quiet apartment, he decided he might as well fix himself dinner. She hated when he skipped meals. Making his way to the kitchen, he thought about what he could eat. Something quick, he wasn't in the mood to cook. Then a small, mischievous smile graced his face. He opened one of the cupboards and grabbed a package of ramen. If he told her that he ate nothing but ramen for the weekend, she would yell at him. After cooking the ramen, he sat on the couch to eat. He turned on the television and scrolled through the channels until he decided on a movie that was playing. As he watched it though, he found himself not really paying attention. Instead, he kept glancing at his phone. What was she doing now? Pressing his lips together, he reached for the remote and turned the tv off. Silence instantly descended on the room. Youngjae closed his eyes, willing for the one noise he wanted to hear to break the quietness. But it never came. He grabbed his phone and opened his messages. He looked back through all the messages they had exchanged. Teasing each other and joking around, mixed with words of encouragement when one confesses to having a bad day. Going to the most recent text, he re-read her message about her weekend plans. He wished her a safe trip and said he hoped she'd have fun. An idea came to him, causing his heartbeat to speed up. No it was stupid. He couldn't do that. Yet, he couldn't stop thinking about it. Swallowing thickly, he began to type out a message. 'This may be weird, but we tell each other everything so I feel like I can tell you this. I miss you. I keep checking my phone, expecting to hear from you, and I'm sad when there's nothing. I hate it. Talking to you is the thing I look forward to the most everyday.' His finger hovered over the send button as he hesitated. This wouldn't be too awkward, right? It was normal to miss a close friend. Of course they hadn't really discussed their relationship, but that's who she was to him. A close friend at the very least, but... possibly more. Making a rash decision, he sent the message. Then he dropped his phone on to the table and leaned back against the couch. He looked around his empty apartment, wondering how he was going to get through this weekend. He had friends of his own he could call. Maybe they could do something together. It wasn't the same, yet it might help make the time pass by faster. Grabbing his phone once more, he sent her one last message. 'Talking to you, I don't feel so lonely.' After sending the text, he tossed his phone to the other side of the couch. Then he turned the television back on. Not because he wanted to finish watching the movie, but so he didn't have to sit there listening to the silence.

It wasn't until Sunday night, while Youngjae was eating ramen again for dinner, that his phone finally signaled a new text message. He froze, with his chopsticks halfway to his mouth, and stared at his phone. Then he dropped everything and hurriedly grabbed his phone. He didn't even need to see the screen to know it was her. Instead of a message though, there was a picture. A mountain road lined with pine trees. It looked like it was taken from the passenger seat of a car. It had to be from the day she had left. At that moment, another picture came through. It was of the small cabin they had rented. He smiled seeing it. She must have had fun. He started typing out a reply when yet another picture was received. A hiking trail. Then another of a flower. Youngjae gaped at his phone as picture after picture showed up. "What the..." He scrolled through them, seeing images of trees and distant views from the top of the mountain. A squirrel, a campfire, a bowl of food that must have been her breakfast. By the time they stopped coming, there must have been over thirty pictures. He waited to see if there were anymore pictures when a text message appeared on the screen. 'All weekend long I kept wanting to tell you about my day, but my phone wouldn't get any reception. I wanted to tell you about the hiking trail that was way too long, but worth it to see the view at the end. About the birds that sang every morning, and the one bastard squirrel that threw an acorn at me. So I took pictures instead, just for you.' His heart skipped a beat. He read the words several times, and while he was doing that, another text came through. 'You make me feel less lonely too.' Cold numbness spread throughout his body. His throat seized up and he swallowed a couple of times. With his hands beginning to shake, he set his phone down. Then he closed his eyes and let out a breath of relief. He wasn't sure if he was reading more in to her word than what was actually there, but he knew one thing for sure. He really could tell her anything. And that knowledge alone was very precious to him. Picking up his phone, he typed out, 'I ate nothing but ramen all weekend.' She replied instantly. 'WHAT??? What the hell?! Eat a freaking vegetable for crying out loud!!' He busted out laughing as he received several more text, all of which was her yelling at him. A huge grin spread on his face and he eagerly read each one.

"Thank you." Youngjae told the barista as he took his cup of coffee. He went over to a vacant table and sat down. Several people moved around the shop, getting their own coffee and he watched them all with mild curiosity. Then he noticed a woman sitting a few tables away. Her hair was pulled back, but a few strands had come loose to frame her face. The yellow dress she wore reminded him of sunflowers and he could easily picture her walking through a field of them. She took a small drink from her own cup before picking up her phone and typing on it. Youngjae turned away. He had stared long enough. He dug his own phone out of his pocket to play on it when it suddenly went off. Looking at the text notification, he clicked on it. 'It's a beautiful day, and not just cause I'm off from work hehe.' He chuckled quietly at that. 'Must be because I have the day off from work then.' A second after he pushed the send button, a little jingle rang out. He looked over at the woman he had been staring at earlier and saw her pick up her phone. She smiled and started pressing on her screen as if she was typing. Youngjae glanced at his phone, then at her, and then back at his phone. That was one hell of a coincidence. Out of the corner of his eye, he continued watching her until she set her phone down. A moment later, his phone beeped. He checked the new message apprehensively. 'Haha! Very funny. You're probably cooped up inside playing video games.' His gaze went back to the female. There was no way, right? Out of every place in the entire city? It couldn't be. Yet his racing heartbeat wasn't easy to ignore. 'Okay this is random but... are you in a coffee shop wearing a yellow dress?' As soon as he sent the message, he stared at the woman again. Her phone went off and as she looked at the screen, her mouth dropped open. Then her head whipped up and she frantically looked around the building. Youngjae immediately looked down as a little smile formed on his face. He waited a bit, steeling himself, before standing up. He stuffed his phone back into his pocket, grabbed his coffee, and headed over to her. She stopped looking around as she noticed him, and Youngjae saw her eyes widen. He stopped at her table and smiled down at her. "Hey. I'm.." "Youngjae." she blurted out loud, interrupting him. He laughed slightly and nodded his head. "Yeah." She blinked at him shock for a few moments and then suddenly stood up so fast, her chair scooted a few inches backwards. She threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck in a tight hug. Unprepared, he stumbled a little and let out a small yelp. Then just as quickly, she released him and took a step back. "Oh I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed while giving him a mortified look. "I don't know why I just did that." He laughed and shook his head dismissively. "It's fine." "It's just that I feel like I've known you forever." she continued, laughing as well. "Really, it's fine." he assured her. He indicated for her to sit and sat down in the chair across from her. "I can't believe this." She sat back down and fidgeted in her seat a bit. "It's nice to finally meet you." "It's nice to meet you too." He set his coffee aside and leaned forward on to the table. "What are the odds?" She laughed and nodded in agreement. Then her face fell as she furrowed her eyebrows. "Why have we never done this before?" Taken aback, he gaped at in surprise. "I... I have no idea." They sat there in silence until they both busted out laughing together. As the laughter died down, Youngjae continued staring at her. A sudden urge to reach over touch her overtook him. He wanted to feel her hair with his fingertips, or to grab her hand so he could feel her skin against his. Without even thinking, he uttered, "Are you doing anything today?" She pressed her lips and tilted her head curiously. "No." He licked his lips. "Do you want to spend the day together?" Youngjae asked her, expecting her to say no. "Yeah, sure." Maybe he was seeing things, or maybe not, but he could have sworn she was blushing.

Youngjae opened the front door and came to a stop. He listened to the noises coming from the kitchen, including the sound of someone singing along to music that was playing. Entering his apartment, he closed the door quietly behind him and kicked off his shoes. He made his way to the kitchen and stared at the scene before him. She was standing by the stove, stirring something in a pot while her hips swayed back and forth in time with the music. Her voice filled the room as she sang along to the lyrics. He smiled as he watched her for a bit, then his smile faded as a feeling of melancholy weighed down his heart. Suddenly she turned around and saw him, making her jump a bit. She laughed at herself while smiling at him. "Hey. I didn't hear you come in." He tried to force himself to smile back at her, but it was a futile effort. "What are you doing here?" She shrugged her shoulders and glanced away as she blushed. "Well, I know you had to work today but I wanted to do something special anyways. It being our one year anniversary and all." She pressed her lips together and indicated towards the stove. "So I'm making us dinner." There was that heavy-hearted feeling again. Youngjae couldn't shake it off. And it wasn't just from having to skip their anniversary. It was more than that. "Let's move in together." Her head jerked back. "What??" "Let's move in together." he repeated, hearing how desperate he sounded in his voice. "I want this. I don't want to come home to a quiet apartment anymore. I don't want lie awake at night in an empty bed, wondering when I could see you again. I want to come home to you, and to hold you in my arms while you're sleeping." He moved forward and cupped her face with his hands. "I want you." Her eyes watered and she swallowed before licking her lips. "I want you too." Four simple words, but it was enough. Enough to replace the sorrow in his heart with happiness. He hurriedly hugged her, holding on to her tightly and never wanting to let go. Especially when she hugged him in return and held on to him just as tight.

[vrenaewrites]

CRAVE by Tracy Wolff thoughts: Chapter 0 - 21

Full video here.

In which a mortal girls goes to her uncle’s boarding school after the death of her parents, and finds it full of creatures.

CH 0 for some reason: if you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space

“Try my hardest not to freak the eff out” - if you’re gonna use expletives, use them

Immediate info dump of “if you’d told me two months ago i was gonna be in fairbanks alaska to get a puddle jumper to denali, the highest mountain point in north america” 

CH 1: landing is just throwing yourself to the ground and hoping you don’t miss

I thought these quotes were weird self help quotes but then i realized they were probably the chapter titles

The fog is referred to as “civil twilight” - this weirded me out because civil blood and twilight, idk if this is a real thing? Will look it up if i remember: it is the brightest of the 3 twilight phases and it is ABUNDANTLY clear that she added the civil part to not make it straight up twilight because this book is unwitting twilight satire

He tells her it’s a short runway “because it’s hard to keep a long one clear of snow or ice for any amount of time” HE’S IN THE MIDDLE OF LANDING A PLANE ATM BRO WE DON’T NEED ALL OF THAT INFO ATM

Grace is kind of funny if not a little cheesy

“Textbook landing” - maybe if that textbook is a horror novel he’s reading upside down and backwards - i don’t know if by listening to this i’m missing the line breaks and short sentences that would make this funny, so if i am lemme know but if she didn’t break this up it’s clunky

Her uncle is headmaster of the boarding school she’s being sent to

“Despite being a year younger than my own 17 years” - did you not read this out loud? Did no one hear how redundant that was?

“According to wikipedia, heeley - hailey? - has only one major road” she’s mentioned google and wikipedia at this point and idk if i’m the only one who finds that type of thing annoying af

“In weather that’s 20 degrees below freezing, if the app on my phone can be believed” THIS IS SO ANNOYING

“The insulated helmet will keep you warm as well as protect your head if we crash” yes macy we know what helmets are and also insulation, again the redundancy

CH 2: Just because you live in a tower doesn’t make you a prince

“Is that kadmere academy?” i shout - not, is that it? They’re on a snowmobile, with helmets on, and macy understood her...and she understood macy saying they’d be there in five minutes

She couldn’t google the academy

“I half expected quasimodo to be waiting for us when we got there”

It may be a castle but at least there’s no moat or dragon

Macy has short rainbow-colored hair

She’s wikipedia’d and googled her life away but didn’t expect to not be able to breathe since she’s coming from sea level and is now up in the mountains - i’m from florida and even i know what altitude sickness is

She sees a flash of red in the window “i don’t know who it is or why they even matter” ...what does that mean?

But she doesn’t see them when she looks back and she’s disappointed, which she acknowledges makes no sense…

“I should be bowing and scraping right about now”

It’s a castle with an xbox and giant flat screen, and they have wifi AND cell service up in the desolate mountains. I went to cossayuna - 476 feet above sea level, 7 miles from a town - and NONE of us had cell service the entire time

She picks up a chess piece and it’s a carved vampire, then a dragon

Then she comes face to face with the most intimidating guy i’ve ever seen, not just because he’s hot, there’s something different and powerful though i don’t have a clue what it is”

Face too intense to be beautiful, skyscraper cheekbones????, red lips, stone-cutting jaw, bottomless obsidian eyes, obscene lashes

Trapped by his stare, hypnotized by the sheer magnetism rolling off him in waves

“Annoyance flashes through me”

He’s blocking her view of anything else - did he step between her and the chess board?? Confusion, but because of this she has to look at his long lean body

“Double-wide shoulders” gross

“Nothing to do but admit that this boy is sexy AF - a little wicked, a lot wild, and all dangerous”

“Seriously, when exactly did i become the heroine of some YA romance? The new girl swooning over the hottest, most unattainable boy in school?”

CH 3: vampire queens aren’t the only ones with a nasty bite

He quotes hamlet to her, and she corrects him for fucks sake

“I warned your uncle you wouldn’t be safe here, but he obviously doesn’t like you much”

“Welcome to alaska?” “more like welcome to hell, now get the fuck out”

“Ignoring the pterodactyls flying around in my stomach” - this is a great line if it didn’t take you completely out of the action, which it does

This whole exchange about big bad monsters is soooooo fucking cliche

And he’s talking about the chess pieces the whole time????? Am confusion.

She’s so horny for this insane man screaming at her and cornering her

She says she’s lost everything that matters and he changes, his agony visible behind “layers and layers of defenses he’s erected”

It’s calling to her own agony

They're soooo connected and staring at each other

He pulls on one of her curls and it makes her super horny

“Five minutes ago he was being a total douche to me”

Pushing him is like pushing a wall of granite

He’s got a scar down half his face that she didn’t notice until now????

“A fallen angel with a bad boy vibe for miles”

She’s touching his scar…

“I don’t understand you”

AND SHE QUOTES HIM QUOTING HAMLET IN RESPONSE

CH 4: shining armor is so last century

“Mr. tall dark and surly” would be more snarky and cute if she didn’t just have an ~earth-shattering moment of connection~ with him over their agony or w/e

Some weird instinct i don’t understand tells me not to mention that guy - the amount of times this girl has acknowledged something she doesn’t understand is so redundant and weird.

She keeps referring to the guy she spent half the last chapter basically falling in insta-love with as “tall dark and surly” as if that didn’t happen, as if he was just a dick and then he left without all the insta-love shit

Uncle finn and flint is a student...couldn’t pick any other name?

“A smile in his eyes that’s as different from the other guy’s iciness as the stars just outside the windows are from the endless midnight blue of the sky” and i’ve fallen asleep while she was spinning this long unending heavy-handed metaphor

His eyes blaze with sympathy

He offers to give her a piggyback up the stairs…

“You’re so little i won’t even notice” not lyk other girls guyz

Four guys open the door and they’re all sexy AF, tall dark and surly is among them ofc

“I couldn’t help but wonder why the icy guy made me hot and the one lending me his warmth left me cold” WE GET IT WE FUCKING GET IT WE DIDN’T NEED YOU TO SPELL OUT THE ALLUSION

“I want a name to go with his insane body and even more insane face”

CH 5: things hot pink and harry styles have in common

Macy is a cinnamon roll i love her

His name is JAXON VEGA...JAXON. G2G

Macy was so nice to her that she finally starts crying because macy is the BEST

Grace puts on a harry styles t-shirt and macy is dancing around to watermelon sugar when she comes back. This book already feels dated and it came out last month

CH 6: no i don’t really want to build a snowman

She wakes up in the middle of the night thinking about jaxon and almost has a panic attack

I hope in the actual book there is a tw for panic attacks because when i see / read about the symptoms of one or a description of one it triggers one for me

She goes exploring the castle in the dark to avoid the attack

Some guys come in wearing like concert tees and ripped jeans and she wonders if they’re ghosts, like how hogwarts has ghosts

I could swear he was sniffing me which was totally bizarre and not ghostlike behavior at all - this was cringe except i was listening to it at like 2x speed so when you hear it fast it’s actually funny

The guys corner her

They say something like “show us what you can do” and they seem to smell something about her…? They’re werewolves maybe??

CH 7: Something really freaking wicked this way comes

Hate these titles sfm

“With my thin california blood, i won’t last in the snow”

Jaxon saved her ofc and makes the guys apologize

“The moon is doing its thing” they’re totally werewolves

She thanks him and he’s like “i just made you a pawn in a game” and she’s like dude what but he’s staring at her and it’s making her hot and bothered

He wipes blood of her bottom lip and sucks it off and she finds it SUPER sexy

“This isn’t like your old high school”

He whispers in her ear “you have no idea what i know” and i’m like..okay dis kinda hot or whatever

She wonders when she’ll see him again and why it matters so much to her - bitch because he makes you horny!!!! Just say that!!!!!!

CH 8: Live and let die

It’s at this point that i stopped for the first round, and i had to ask: why the FUCK didn’t macy or the headmaster tell grace that this was a school for - obviously - vampires and werewolves? Is macy one? Is it genetic? Grace is a mortal according to the back of the book.

Grace tells macy what happened minus jax

She mentions to macy the boys didn’t have cold weather gear on and macy’s like hmmm weird idk anything about that

And they’re going to a party tonight and grace is like i don’t wear makeup i only own makeup and lip gloss and i’m like...did i accidentally re-download AFTER because here we go with the NLOG syndrome

The party is a welcome party for grace - and it’s actually a high tea??? Tf?

“I’d die without netflix”

“Have you seen this show legacies? It’s about a bunch of supernatural creatures that go to a boarding school! Isn’t that silly??!”

And then macy says, “who can resist a hot vampire?”

Guys….are we SURE this isn’t satire?

“I can’t help remembering what those guys said about the moon doing its thing when i see the werewolf on the show…”

CH 9: Even hell has its factions

Omg her dress is showing off too much of her big boobs, maybe the jeans she originally wanted to wear will be better

Macy calls her beautiful and then we get a full “with my curly hair and freckles and this color eyes i’m so not beautiful, i’m wallpaper next to macy”

“We could be fashionably absent” lol

The beads on the door don’t shock grace but they shock everyone because she is NOT LIKE OTHER GIIIIIIIIRLS

This castle is goth chic baybeeeeee the light fixtures are downturned thorny black roses where can i cop these

“The pterodactyls in my stomach are now butterflies”

She says FML. did a 50 year old woman write this. Edit: i looked, i cannot find how old this author is

Velvet wallpaper, wall sconces shaped like dragons, LET ME IN

“Self-imposed isolation” lol little did she know what a phrase in the lexicon this would become in 2020

Cliques include muscular people near the windows, soft flowery delicate people in the back of the room which are macy’s friends, super-tall literally hot people in the middle, and the black-or-white money people that seem to be more formal

She says “basketball anyone??” re the tall people lol

I am going to guess: werewolves, witches, dragons??, and vampires

Macy keeps having coughing fits?

Hot redhead - simone, hot dark girl - lily, hot asian girl - gwen

“Simone’s just bitter all the guys are looking at you”

Grace loves dr. pepper so i fuck with her

Macy’s boyfriend is cam and his friend is james, who looks at her like she is food?

“I’m just not that interesting”

CH 10: turns out, the devil wears gucci

Would i have probably picked this title as well? Yes. did it make me cringe nonetheless? Fer shure.

“Do i need some jerk trying to make me his afternoon snack?” huh???? As far as you know these are normal boys...make it make sense

Jaxon makes his ENTRAAAANCE BABY

Dressed all in gucci black - she can tell from across the goddamn room

“Jaxon is anything but regular, anything but ordinary, even here among the blatantly extraordinary”

Icy blank stare soooooo much

She calls his voice low wicked and wild

She can’t stop thinking about “running my tongue over the perfect bow of his upper lip, dragging is lower lip between my teeth”

Idk where these thoughts are coming from!!!! Baby you 17 c’mon now

I try to think of anything else, snow!

She takes a drink and it goes down the wrong pipe lmaoooo

“At least if i find a bathroom i can die in peace” lol

But he touches her and she stops choking and she’s like “he couldn’t have stopped that, i know, but…”

He stares at her as he bites the strawberry and she takes it as a threat

CH 11: in the library, no one can hear you scream

“His moods change more quickly than my bffs instafeed” I -

Oh so NOW she’ll say “the fuck you in his eyes” but she was saying freaking and eff before...did her publisher tell her only x amount of fucks per book?

She goes into the library and her body is like RUN, but she ignores it…

There are beautiful gargoyles and ornate shelves and...stickers fucking everywhere?

The gargoyle is pointing to an secret room that says students needs permission, but she hears chanting and decides to check it out since it might be one of the native languages spoken in alaskaaaaaaaaaa

“Especially because some of them only have less than 4,000 speakers left in the world” okay gracie-pedia tf?

CH 12: it’s all fun and games until someone loses their life

She meets a girl named Leah - who was the one chanting

Okay but i do fuck with the horror movie quote pillows…

Damn leah’s boyfriend died…

“Tea from homemade leaves” again...read this out loud before you put it in a published novel...do you mean loose leaves? Do you mean homegrown leaves?

Is she gonna poison her????

“What do you guys have to lie about that’s so important?” “Everything”

CH 13: just bite me

“Lol jk”

“Finish your drink” BITCH IT’S POISON

Macy and leah are being soooo weird about what could have happened to grace on her own

Apparently leah is super popular and secretive so it’s weird she took to grace so fast - is this a NLOG sitch or a “come into my web little fly” sitch?

She pukes because of “altitude sickness” aka poisoning i bet

CH 14: knock knock knocking on death’s door

This theme of bastardization of guns and roses songs is really....something.

Grace takes a mental health day because she’s still feeling weird

Flint comes to check on her and invite her to a snowball fight…?

If your character’s name is grace, i feel like you can’t use gracefully as an adjective, the same way you wouldn’t say Rue said something ruefully.

Flint kisses her cheek and i’m already waiting for this Great Value Edward/Jacob triangle

But he makes her feel ~nothing~ compared to jaxon

CH 15: so hell actually can freeze over

Macy likes flint, uh-oh

But the different groups don’t mix

“What is this, mean girls alaska edition?” - stfu

Omg her uncle checks on her and he reminds her of her dad and :(

We get sooooooo much detail about how to dress to go out into the wilderness...here is one thing i was able to find out: tracy wolff lives in texas. So i feel like she did ALL this research and then was like y’all gonna LEARN ABOUT THIS I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME!

As a girl who has never ever seen snow, i felt this fascination

She finds a gnarled up weird tree guarding a trail

“A weird sense that i should turn around - like the feeling in the library - came over me but i knew i was just being silly”

The lack of survival instinct henny

She comes across a gazebo where leah and jaxon are sitting

CH 16: sometimes keeping your enemies close is the only thing that prevents hypothermia

That’s not a chapter title, it’s an entire sentence…

Ooh they’re having an angry, intimate convo

And leah slaps him!!

“They’re looking at me like they’re the predators and i’m the prey they can’t wait to sink their teeth into” we get it, first of all. Second of all, what is with the long-winded metaphors

“Every time i catch sight of him i feel something tug at me i can’t identify, something i have no ability to explain” it’s horniness.

Then she just leaves but he catches up to her

With his sexy af hair blowing

“Trying to run away from all the thing he makes me feel when really i just want to grab on to him and hold on tight” - so what is the truth?! You keep acting like you don’t know what the feeling is but clearly, YOU DO.

“Everyone answers to me, eventually.” - we found the line used in the adverts guys!

Oh my god, what an asshat. Asshole, i would have laughed. Asshat is stupid.

It’s annoying af

Doing my best dory impression: just keep walking

“Making friends with a dr - a guy like flint” CALLED IT, he’s a dragon

Leah’s boyfriend was jaxon’s brother

Neither leah nor jaxon was wearing a jacket. BOOM

CH 17: it’s discretion, not diamonds, that’s a girl’s best friend

Not only cringe but grammatically incorrect…she coulda just said “discretion is a girl’s best friend” and we woulda got the reference….

Grace mentions jaxon in front of macy and she’s supes weird and grace is FINALLY like wtf is the secret you’re hiding from me

“She looks at me like i’m a few snowflakes short of a snowball” SOMEONE. READ THIS OUT LOUD. WHERE IS HER EDITOR I JUST WANNA TALK.

The order?! “Just a nickname for the popular boys” bullSHIT

Macy FREAKS OUT when she realizes grace has been alone with jaxon

She says he was interesting and “macy looks at me like i said i wanted to bodysurf the alaskan tundra”

Macy “We’re talking about jaxon right? Arrogance of a rock star?”

She didn’t mention “the scar that turns him from to pretty sexy af, and scary af”

“He’s not the one who tried to kill me” “you’ve only been here a few days, give it time” get her MACY!

HE WAS LISTENING!!!!

CH 18: how many hot guys does it take to win a snowball fight?

Ooh jaxon mad that grace is going to flint’s snowball fight

“His breath is so warm and soft that i can feel it everywhere, even deep inside” okay you horny bitch!!!!! Was this cringe or did i like it or both?

“The orange and dark water scent of him” ...what? Dark water is a cologne? Or does she literally mean like the dark water of the ocean? What in confusion

Her throat is always tight and dry around him, all the time, every day

Flint pops up and he is wearing a dragon beanie…

The rest of the order shows up and “For the first time the phrase got your back makes sense” to grace...are you kidding me? You never understood a very simple common phrase til now? Sure jan

SEXUAL TRIANGLE TENSIOOOOOOOOON

But she only has eyes for Jaxon...they both reach to touch each other.

“Grace” it’s barely a whisper but i feel it all the way inside myself BITCH

“Something tells me this boy and his world famous disappearing act is going to be the death of me”

CH 19: we came, we fought, i froze

Civil twilight AGAIN.

“I didn’t think screwed up and obnoxious was your type” me-OW

The snowball fight happens

Sounds like fun, the designer faction isn’t there

“Did she just do parkour against that tree?” re: Macy so close to being funny. I did exhale through my nose. Then “did you just parkour that tree?” i DID laugh

Flint climbs the tree with grace over his shoulder ‘like spider man’ and all i can think is “you better hold on tight spider monkey”

The wind is so strong it knocks her out of the tree…

CH 20: there’s never a parachute around when you need one

Flint catches her in mid-air...this man… #teamflint2020

“You’re heavier than you look” dead

He has shame in his eyes? Why?

Because JAXON IS THERE AND HE IS MAD!

And flint is SUPER MAD!!!!!!!

Jaxon puts himself between grace and flint so grace can’t touch flint

“Can i just say i’m feeling a lot like alice in wonderland here? Things get curiouser and curiouser.” stfu

I was laughing because she was like “so much for fitting in, now i might as well be painted biohazard orange” but then she said fml. Stfu

Jaxon picks her up

CH 21: I like standing on my own two feet, but getting swept off them feels surprisingly good, too

If it takes up more than one line of a google docs page IT’S NOT A FUCKING CHAPTER TITLE!!!!!

Ooh and his arms feel really good around her, REALLY good

Now he smells like orange and snow and it’s making her crazy

Macy looks at them like she’s getting punk’d

“Grace.” “what?” “shut up.” i’m dead

“I sprained my ankle, i’m not dying of consumption” “yeah well, the night is young” this made me lol despite it being more of macy’s voice than jaxon’s

Jaxon is blaming grace for falling? “You don’t see macy falling out of her tree” is he negging her rn?

She’s called him super-sexy twice in a paragraph

Macy goes to get ice bc she’s scared of Jaxon and grace says, “Et tu, brute?” lmaooo

“I can do it myself” “maybe i wanna do it for you” and macy squeaks LMAO

His scar makes his smile a crooked little smirk...who else had a crooked smirk...the vampire this is 1000% based on, maybe?

“I find myself relaxing despite myself” guys. Reading is power. Read your work out loud so you can hear when you use the same word twice in a sentence, like this.

“My whole body lights up like the aurora borealis i’m still dying to see”

They almost kiss but don’t bc macy comes back

~~~

[mamin-the-troll]

Tag game

Was tagged by @funkzpiel​ and @axilarts​ Thank you!! *hugs* (っ*´∀｀*)っ 1. Always post the rules.
 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you.
 3. Write 11 questions of your own.
 4. Tag 11 people.

it’s long… I can’t stop talking so I put everything under the cut!

FROM FUNKZPIEL

What is your favorite, weird comfort quirk?

I like holding stuff in my palm? Sometimes, I hold paper napkin, menthol salt or keys for hours. 

I keep textbook under my pillow the night before exams. 

I will dress extra nice when I need my luck. I won’t go to final exams or do final presentations look like death. I believe lady luck prefers me look nice XD

Tumblr Crush

Oh, currently my tumblr crush is you @funkzpiel​ because you are soooo sweet.

Beach or Mountains?

Mountains. I’ve already done with hot weather.

What’s one big fear you are trying to overcome?

I only have petty fears (my greatest fear is death of the love ones. I don’t think I could overcome it) but if I have to choose one maybe ‘afraid of the height’? I can’t stand too close to a window of 5 stories building let alone skyscraper. 

Favorite dream you’ve ever had?

Once, I dreamed that we went to dig potatoes at school yard then those potatoes turned out to be our grades lol

Do you believe in ghosts?

Sometimes yes. Sometimes no. Currently no. 

Fanfic you would recommend to others/really touched you, etc.?

Hardest question! I like LOTS of fanfics I can’t really choose ; w ;;; to narrow things down I will only rec finished stories then….. 

Gramander:  -  The Case of the Missing Obscurus by manic_intent -  Basic Instincts by manic_intent -  Safe in Your Arms by pinchess07  -  The Graves Identity by Mishafied

Crewt:  - Fantastic Wizards and How to Woo Them by OreoCheesecake

There’re still lot of fanfics that I haven’t rec because it’s unfinished. I think I’m going to make special rec post later :)) (because damn, I love Funkzpiel’s  Little Blue Riding Newt and wanna go in details about it :D)

Fan Art that everyone needs to stop what they’re doing and look at?

Ahhh fanart! Lots of fbawtft artist I followed are in twitter ; w ;;;

Fukumochi : I enjoy their comic even if I can’t understand Japanese!

Daizu : I want their grindelnewt doujin damnit..

Namdong24 : I want their gramander doujin damnit..

Xuan : Look at their currently pinned tweet *is death*

Sayatsugu : THAT DOUJIN ON THEIR PINNED TWEET!!!

믽  : THEIR NEWT & HIS SMILE!!!! I DON’T HAVE TO SAY MORE

Could I extend the list into original art too.. because damn I have a lot of artists that I wanna share. (I’ll add their names here anyway lol)

Ofsparrows : Their gif is the best! It looks like you’re watching a wizard photo or something! I wish I could do something like this <3

Celine-kim : just click her link and look at her work. I don’t have to explain. LOOK AT HER PORTFOLIO http://www.celine-kim.com/ THE LIGHTING, SHADOW, COLOURS AND DETAILS. I’d die to have this much talent (kidding I don’t want to die yet) I LOVE CONCEPT ART and all of her port is my dream come true omg!

Vanessamakesthings : Her traditional art is absolutely beautiful. Ink, watercolour, pencils and etc. Her work is very easy to look at. Eyes pleasing <3

Peaheart : HIS WATERCOLOUR SKETCHBOOK!! How could he use watercolour like that *sobs* I thought watercolour is … watery but his works! *screaming*

Audreybenjaminsen : Definition of dark fantasy omg. Her pencil work! and heyyy she draw HP too! *happily death*

There’s a lot more but I should stop… sorry

Fanfic premise you wish someone would write, but haven’t seen yet?

Why I can’t think of any right now …. but I have secret soft spot for de-aged Newt story. 5+1 things about every characters looking after de-aged Newt would be really nice….

Dream house/job?

Dream house: Nice and warm with lots of loves. Have puppies/ kitties. Have hobby/crafting-corner :D 

Dream job: Routine job. Just let me go at 5 sharp. No overtimes. I have lots of other things to do :D

Something you’re really proud of (fandom-related or otherwise)?

Omg I’m the proudest person you can ever known >:3c

Fandom-related: 

I used to be a staff of a Comic Convention. The con purposed is to raise a money for helping those who have heart diseases. It’s a very nice and heartwarming con if I do say so myself!

I turned one of online friend into irl friend! We’ve been knowing each other for nearly 9 years now! She said that I’m her best friend! I’m soo proud <3

Look at my 8 years ago drawing and cringe. Best kind of cringe because it means I improve a lot!

Had someone said that my doujin-plot is the very best and it stunned them. They were looking forward to see next volume … which I didn’t continue lol

Non-fandom-related: 

I quit my old major/ faculty because I hate it even though I’d already spent 2 years there. It wasn’t easy to start anew. I’m so glad I did!

Going to finish my Master degree now! Yayyy

My prof. ask me if I want to publish my thesis in a journal! 

The list is going on and on XD

.

FROM AXILARTS

If you had to change your name, what would your new name be, and why would you choose that name?

I rather like my both my given name and nickname! Both are quite unique <3 I wouldn’t change it but if it were too hard for a foreigner to pronounce then… might choose something similar. Nachisa for Japanese and Natasha for Western folks?

If you could live in one fictional universe what would it be?

HARRY POTTER HANDS DOWN!!!

What is the dumbest way you’ve been injured?

LOTS…. ohhh I recalled 2 and both almost killed me. I can’t decide which is the dumbest though…

On my 6th year-old birthday, my older sister, cousins and I were having a party. After cake we decided to play a game. I don’t know what it’s called in English but the game is a lot like tag but ‘it’ has their eyes tied by a piece of cloth. I was a ‘it’ in that round. I heard some noise from one side so I lunged there…. only to find out that the door wasn’t closed and I fell down to the bottom of stairs. Ughh it hurt so bad :(

I can’t remember how old I was in this one but still very young. We’re in a pool and my sister teased me until I got really flustered and mad. I stepped out of the pool and out of my floating ring. I was going to throw the floating ring at my sister out of sheer madness but my body passed through the ring like a fucking dolphin and fell into the pool instead. I can’t swim…. my sister also can’t swim…. luckily, one of my older cousin was there to save my sorry ass.

Ever cried of happiness? Care to share?

Can’t recall any …. why I’m like this lol I rarely got that emotional… I might had cried one time that I remember how lucky I am to be me, surrounded with lovely family and people.

Who’s your hero, fictional or otherwise?

Dobby and Hagrid. They’re underrated characters but got a really big and kind heart. 

I really love Hargrid from the start. He’s big and clumsy but really kind. He cried and wanted to say goodbye to a baby that he didn’t even know. What broke my heart is the last book when he thought Harry was dead though. 

The only death that made me cried like a baby is Dobby’s death. I shredded few tears for other characters but Dobby’s hit me the most. He always try to help Harry. He really did in the end. *sobs*

Something you’re really proud of/best compliment you’ve ever received?

I love talking to you

You’re one of my best friends

I’m so glad I have you as my best friend

TAGGING:

@axilarts, @funkzpiel, @natecchi, @thegaypumpingthroughyourveins, @psychoticartemis and anywho that want to do this :D

QUESTIONS:

1. What do you like best about yourself? 2. What quality are you looking for in a future partner? 3. Why do you like your favourite character? 4. Do you have siblings? Care to share their&your funny stories? 5. Did you ever experience life threaten situation?  6. Do you believe in afterlife? 7. Favourite smell and why? 8. Have you collect anything? 9. What is your favourite beast in fantastic beasts? 10. One thing about yourself that going to shock everyone? 11. 3 words that best describe yourself, why?

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #72

hey ya’ll, kinda conflicting moods in this survey; the earlier, dreary-sounding answers, please do not worry about them, as i took this over the course of longer than a week.  i was hospitalized this past week and am currently home safe again.  i just don’t feel like going back changing answers, lol.

are you currently distressed about anything?   yes, quite a bit.  i found the gem to the ring jason gave me, but i can't find the ring itself... i really wanna fix it and wear it.  i'm pretty damn upset about the situation, considering how much i cherish anything i've ever had from him. do you like your pop tarts toasted or cold?   i like them how they are in the package. do you like sitting in the front, back, or middle of the classroom?   i prefer the front, 'cuz i can see better and i feel more obligated to engage. what’s your least favorite flavor of candy?   orange do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before?   no. which is worse: living where there’s lots of tornadoes or lots of hurricanes?   tornadoes, definitely.  i live where there are plenty of hurricanes, and the last one we had that was truly devastating was floyd, and that occurred when i was a very young child.  tornadoes, meanwhile, are more immediately dangerous. have you ever seen a black rose?   no, but i would loooove to... do you like pie?   no, actually. if you died right now, how would you feel about your life?   it was a nightmare. do you have any morbid interests?   gore and guts.  bones.  death itself, kinda. if someone were to ask you if you were okay right now, are you?   no.  i'm currently waiting for the suicide hotline's online chat room to open up.  i've been a wreck all evening and google searched something i shouldn't have; google gave me the number to the hotline as well as the option to chat online.  i broke the fuck down.  i've been waiting for a spot to open for like ten minutes... have you ever thrown up from working out?   no, but i know i've been close. do you have any gay family members?   i think i have an uncle who is? would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn?   fuck yes i would be. (new day.) would you date someone who still lived with their parents?   uhhh, why wouldn't i...? would you have to sleep with someone before marrying them?   nope. would you enjoy a night of playing video games?   very much so. would you watch a porno with your partner?   absolutely not. would you be okay with your partner hanging with their ex as friends?   errr... i hate admitting this, but no.  it's suspicious. coffee or tea?   i have a strong dislike of both, really. when was the last time you climbed a tree?
   never; nc doesn't really have climbable trees, just pines. what clubs do/did you participate in at school?
   i was in the art club and shit, what was it called... it was for honors students... what is something you and your best friend say/do that seems strange to an outsider?
   act gay as hecke do you like to sleep near the wall, the middle, or the open side of the bed?
   open side. what’s the strangest rumor that has ever been spread about you?
   a rumor started in high school that jason and i had had a baby.  a rachel is who told the person who told me, soooo i'm not stupid.  i know which rachel started it. how involved were you in the drama of your high school?   not at all. do you like to cuddle while you are sleeping?   all night, no.  when jason and i were dating, i would usually begin sleeping cuddled with him, but would pull away during the night because i got hot. what are you favorite places to be touched?
   i'm guessing you mean sexually?  personally my breasts are very sensitive to touch. do you like lip biting?   again, in a sexual context?  sure. describe your first date.   jason took mom and me to see "ghost rider 2."  i personally thought it was very cute that he wanted mom to come, too. what really goes on in your head?   memories, poisoned with remorse.  i'm always looking back and missing how things used to be.  death and decay goes on in my head.  passions pass away, and the darkness that i try so hard to keep in the back of mind envelops its entirety more and more each time i weaken.  i don't mean to sound all dark or poetic, it's just... how i describe things.  i wish just one person would understand exactly what's happening up there. do other people’s opinions mean anything to you?   sometimes. have you ever just wanted to run away to see who would follow?   i have run away, and nearly got the police on my ass. have you ever had a hamster as a pet?   multiple times.  all were assholes. who do you really need in your life?   jason.  yet he's not here. way down in there’s any part of you sad at all?   all parts of me are sad. what’s your favorite type of insect?   i really love butterflies, moths, dragonflies, ladybugs... is there anything worrying you right now? if so, have you talked to anyone about it?   when am i not worried...  i'm so scared jason won't come back.  the last person i talked to about it was virginia, his mom.  i was suicidal last night and was very, very sincerely contemplating killing myself, and i wanted to talk to him, because i feel like he's the only one who can talk me out of it.  so i found their number and called their house past midnight.  i talked to virginia; jason had just gone to bed, and she didn't want to wake him up.  she's such a sweet woman...  she tried so hard to help, but it was all in vain. apart from sleeping, what do you plan to do tonight?   cry, i'm sure. does anyone see you as a role model?   i'm certain that's a no. what is something that you’ve recently learned?   it's very likely i have bpd. what is your most expensive possession?   the laptop jason gave me... but it's broken right now. what’s the worst sickness you’ve ever had?   aside from mental illness, the worst physical illness was just a REALLY bad stomach virus.  i've never even had the flu. are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day?
   if i ever get married... then yeah.  it's one of my fairytales. what kind of music do you tend to like?   heavy metal, some harder rock. do you have any mental disorders?   and they're going to kill me. do you believe everything happens for a reason?   fuck that. do you know anyone who married their high school sweetheart?   yes. do you live in the moment?   i live in the past. how many more minutes until you will next eat?   i should've eaten an hour ago.  but i'm too upset to be hungry. what do/did you normally get detentions for?   i only ever got detention for too many tardies. what do you currently hear?   "i don't love you" by my chemical romance, my typing, my sniffling, and my heart pounding in my head. do you ever worry about what the world will be like when you have kids?   i won't have kids anyway.  i don't even know why i'm spending my time doing this survey.  i'm procrastinating on looking for any sleeping pills in the house.  i'm done. do you like the band a skylit drive?   i like their cover of "love the way you lie" who’s someone you want to see right now?   jason.  he could stop this.  i know he could. have you ever been stung by anything?   no, i haven't. have you ever parked in a handicapped spot when you weren’t supposed to?   no, i fucking hate people who do that. are you paranoid?   only always. (next week) are you currently learning from anyone how to play any instruments?   nope. would you rather be able to teleport or freeze time? which one seems best?   hmmm.  teleport, i guess. do you like soda pop? if so, which is your favorite and least favorite?   i sadly do.  i loooove mountain dew, and i really hate pepsi. does it annoy you when surveys ask questions about controversial topics, or do you like arguing your point?   i like controversial questions, honestly.  i like making a point. are there any specific piercings you would never, ever get done?   the only piercing i would never get, even for a ludicrous amount of money, is around my private area.  nope. assuming you had sufficient funds, would you be capable of living alone, paying bills and looking after yourself properly?   honestly, no.  probably not. do you know anyone who had to have tubes put in their ears as a baby?   meeee! were either of your parents baptized?   idk the last concert that you were at, was there a mosh pit?   ha ha omg, a mosh pit at an alice cooper concert in north carolina... that'd be a sight to see. does your bathroom have a theme to it?   nope. when you are eating fast food, do you tend to get burgers or chicken?   burgers, almost always. are you self-conscious of your smile?   yes, because my eyes squint. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?   writing.  sometimes drawing. what color do you really want to dye your hair?   GRAY.  mom won't let me. :( sunrise or sunset?   sunset is prettier, imo. what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?   i love some of the petnames colleen calls me, honestly.  it's just sweet. what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.   socks suck.  period.  i avoid them at all costs. have you ever shaved in the kitchen sink?   how flexible you think i am, fam? do you play the wii?   very rarely. be honest, did fifty shades of grey arouse you in any way?   i didn't read/watch it, and i have no plans to. do have faith in yourself?   lmao did you parents know what gender you were before you were born?   i'm not sure, actually.  i do know, however, everyone first thought i was a boy; i always had my legs crossed in the ultrasound.  mom, however, "knew" i was a girl. does your mother still take care of you if you get ill?   not really.  like i guess if i called her to get me some ginger ale or something, she'd do it, but i kinda just take care of myself. is there a certain topic that you struggle to talk about, because it makes you feel uncomfortable?   not really. if you’re not in college, why?   because i mentally cannot handle the stress it causes. do you try to avoid burping in public, or are you open about it?  after all, it is a normal bodily function.   i'm very discreet about it normally, just because of social standards.  around family and very close friends, i don't give a shit. do you like regular peppermint candy canes, or do you prefer different flavored ones [fruits, bubble gum, cinnamon, etc.]?   i like the fruity flavors. what do you think is the dumbest / tackiest piercing?   i don't really know. have you ever requested a song on the radio?   no. would you ever dye your hair black?   i have before and i loved it. when did you last see the person you love/like? when will you next see them?   i saw him yesterday... and i probably never will again... is there a member of the opposite sex on your mind atm? do you think that person will be thinking about you too?   he always is, and i can absolutely guarantee he's not thinking about me. do you know the star sign of the last person you kissed?   he's an aquarius, like me. what’s the naughtiest thing you’ve ever done, and you got away with it?   got sexual on my parents' bed, i guess. who was the last person of the opposite sex to make you smile? are you attracted to that person?   jason, and yeah... do you currently have any medicine in your bag / purse / etc? if so, what kind?   no, i'm not allowed to.  i overdosed the other day. what do you like on your pasta / noodles? sauce, butter, grated cheese, etc.?   sauce, always. are you weary of displaying signs of affection for your significant other around adults? why or why not?   no, because love should be very openly celebrated. do you think teenagers can be in love?   absolutely.  i was and still am now from the same relationship as an adult. how fast does your mood change?   0-100 real quick, boo. at this moment in time if you HAD to have someone’s name tattooed on you who’s would it be?   uhhh... literally no one's.  i just wouldn't.  well uh, i guess if it was life or death, uhhh... probably jason's, honestly??  but realistically, i never would get anyone's?? what’s your all-time favorite COMEDY movie?   hm.  maybe "white chicks" or "rush hour 2" how old is your most recent ex?   he's 23. how many keys are on your key chain?   two how does your hair look right now?   it's all big and suuuuper curly!!!  chelsea did it. :D does your house have a white picket fence?   nope. do you wear bracelets?   no, never. when was the last time you had sex?   never. #regret do you have a wild side?   only j's seen it, honestly... heh. what is your favorite thing about going to your grandma’s house?   literally.  nothing. who did you last have an alcoholic drink with?   chelsea.  good day. where do you plan on living within the next few years?   probably the same 'ole north carolina. do you have an addiction?   debatably the internet, but i honestly consider it more of a dependence. if you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?   2016, absolutely. do you believe you should change who you are for the person you love?   to a degree, sure. when you’re home alone, do you still keep the door closed when you shower?   the bathroom door is open, my room door is closed. do you currently have a hickey?   i wish ha ha. now your cell phone, what color is it?   black. how many times have you gotten into a argument with the last person you kissed?   plenty of times. what color is your hair?   ruby red, with redder highlights and brown roots coming in. your parents are divorced/married/separated?   divorced have you ever let someone be your everything?   and i'm a broken person because of it. do you think that you’re good enough for the one you like?   no.  he made it clear i deserve to suffer for giving up. have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?   ahhh, yes. (: have you ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend who was depressed?   no. do you like sitting on the inside or outside of a restaurant booth?   inside.  feel safer/cozier. have you ever had sex or something like it?   something like it, sure, but not actual sex. have you ever worn fishnets?   i don't think so... but maybe for dance? do you always wear your seat belt?   yep. have you ever liked someone much older than you?   not seriously. are there any diseases/health problems that run in your family?   oh god.  heart disease, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, asthma, cancer, depression, bipolarity, more shit i'm forgetting... do you have asthma?   no. are tongue piercings slutty?   ... no? last person to take off your pants, besides you?   jason. when you get colds, do you use nasal spray to help get your nose unstuffy?   yep. what’s your second favorite color?   pink, probably. how many times have you been so drunk you didn’t remember the night before?   never. what sexual kinks do you personally enjoy, if any?   i actually had to look up some kinks bc idk if some things are considered kinks or not?  evidently even something as common as spanking is, and i'm into that very mildly.  anr (i think that's be abbreviation, probably wrong...) is something that's like guaranteed to turn me on.  i also like feeling/acting sexually submissive in general, but i deeefinitely wouldn't consider it to the point of the dom/sub kink. ever faked an orgasm?   no. own some type of work out machine?   not anymore. ever wanted to be a vet?   i did as a child, yes. ever flashed someone you liked?   i maybe have to jason, while alone with him, but even then i'm not certain i ever have. ever had a job? if so, what and for how long?   first job i had for a month or two.  second, like, four days. do you have a favorite sexual position, even if you’re a virgin?   missionary is all i've ever tried and i'm fine with that. ever done oral? with how many people?   yes, one. what condom brand do you use?   i don't use them because i don't have sex.  on the one occasion jason bought condoms just to be safe in case we chose to, i'm not sure what brand he got... do you use flavored/scented/glow-in-the-dark/neon/ribbed condoms?   again, i don't use them, but also once more, on the one occasion jason bought some, they were just normal. what about facebook - do your grandparents use facebook?   my maternal grandmother does. do you have any text messages from your ex, or have you deleted them all?   no.  the phone i've had i got after the breakup, so. tell me 3 facts about the first person you had a relationship with.   i've "dated" three people, but i've definitely only had a romantic relationship with one, so i'm using him in this question.  he loves games of all kinds, he's a huge joker (particularly heath ledger's) fan, and he's studying computer engineering/he's in his last semester. think about your last ex. do you still find him/her attractive?   he's very handsome, yes. do you regret kissing the last person you kissed?   i never will. have you ever wanted to be a teacher?   nope. if someone were to ask you out right now, would you say yes?   the only person i'd say yes to would be jason. what was the last thing you took medication for?   my tremors. if someone offered you sex right now, how would you respond?   again, i'd only yes to jason. do you think you’ve found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?   i don't think i found the person, i know i did.  yet i can't. be honest, what do you want more than anything at this moment in time?   i just want to cuddle with jason. have you had any conversations recently that made you feel uncomfortable or upset?   i talked to jason, face-to-face, two days ago to assist me in gaining closure.  very long story short, i was quiiite upset after he left. what’s the farthest away from home you have ever been?   michigan the last person you had a thing with calls wanting to hang out. what do you do?   say "of course!" in probably the most excited voice ever. what is your favorite shade of blue?   hmm.  navy, i assume. what ozzy lyric describes you best?   a suRVEY QUESTION REGARDING MY FAVORITE ARTIST???  HELL YEAH!!  anyway, i've felt a resonance with "you don't have to leave the lights on; i'm so used to being blind" from "tomorrow" for many years. what was the most important decision you made that screwed up your life the most?   giving up on just that: life. what is love really about?   it's science, but also something inexplicable.  it's the perfect combination of your brain's "happy hormones," and only that one person can achieve that certain mixture.  granted, there are different kinds of love, and each one is unique. what metallica lyric most describes your life?   wHO FUCKING WROTE THIS, ANOTHER QUESTION W/ ANOTHER FAVORITE ARTIST???  I WANNA MARRY THE SURVEY MAKER PLS.  um anyway let's see, i could really list a few.  first, i wanna say i feel a VERY strong connection to "the unforgiven ii" as a whole; all the lyrics mean very much to me.  but if you want a particular lyric, these couple mean the world: "how can i be lost, if i've got nowhere to go? / and how can i blame you, when it's me i can't forgive?" from "the unforgiven iii"  omgggg i could keep going on ;-; ever been to ozzfest?   girl, I WISH. what's the most illegal thing you've done?   just downloading music.  wait actually, probably downloading an expensive program illegally. ever have a tornado in your town?   i don't think so. what percentile of your class were you in?   idk about numbers, but the very top.  i got an award for it.  idk what ever happened... can you name every place you've ever had sex?   i've never had sex, but i've gotten sexual on my bed, his bed, the floor, the couch, the chaise... what forms of birth control have you used?   abstinence is... pretty flawless. handcuffs or rope :D?   errr, i'm guessing you're addressing being tied up sexually?  i'm... kinda into the idea of being handcuffed to something, maybe. *shrugs* ever grown any plants before? what were they?   habaneros, zinnias, sunflowers... how many times did you intentionally start to commit suicide?   three.  i was going to slit my throat on two occasions, and on the last, i overdosed. what is your favorite cover song?   "hurt" by johnny cash.  "another brick in the wall" by korn is a close second. ever raise a child that wasn't your own for more than 3 months?   nope. strangest medical procedure ever performed on you?   idk, i guess just getting tubes put in my ears. if you ever got a tattoo, where would you get it?   i already have three and want loads more like... everywhere.  most specifically though, i think sternum tattoos are drop-dead gorgeous. could you ever go vegetarian?   no.  i enjoy meat too much. how do you fall asleep? [i.e, listening to music, reading, daydreaming…]   just thinking... have you ever been chased by bees?   omg no. what is your opinion on homosexuality?   it's a mutation, but that does not make it wrong. what is your biggest fear in life?   being alone in life.  not being able to function properly in the "real world" is a close second. when was the last time you kissed someone?   2015 are you sick quite often or hardly at all?   hardly at all.  proud of that 'ole immune system. has anyone suspected you of being a different sexuality?   apparently. do you like chocolate or vanilla cake more?   chocolate, definitely. does it bother you to have blood drawn or not so much?   no, but i actually have noticed something: it began to bother me ever so slightly more after jason passed out from me getting my blood taken that one time.  i think it's because of how i look up to and see him in general, seeing him react to something like that, a part of my brain wants to believe "omg that has to be dangerous then."  but in general, i don't really have issue with getting my blood drawn. who would you say is your best friend at the moment?   colleen.  always. how long have you two been best friends?   over two years. do you sometimes think you aren’t as fortunate as others?   it's not something i dwell on, but i know i'm not. have you ever tried opening your eyes under water?   i have, and i'm bad at it. have you ever been admitted to the hospital?   only six times. what would you say is your favorite type of flower?   tiger lilies, i think. how old is your pet?   teddy is ten, cali isss... three, i think, bentley's not even a year, and lexi is around two, probs. do you listen to artists who consist more of guys, girls, or both?   i seem to prefer male artists. what’s your first tattoo?   a semicolon butterfly on my right wrist. what song do you listen to when you’re sad?   "perfectly flawed" by otep is common.  hence my tattoo. <3 is there a person in your life that can always make you smile?   not anymore. are you scared about the end of the world?   not really, because i don't think i'll be around to see it. will you ever get a tattoo?   i have three and want more.  my next tattoo will be an adaptation of "denialism" by deviantart's tatchit.  look it up, it is honestly a phenomenal work of art. when you get yelled at, do you yell back or let it go?   well first, i get triggered.  yelling triggers memories of my parents fighting so much.  odds are, i'll yell back, but it really depends. do you share a computer with your siblings?   nooo. do you have mood swings?   badly. do you have any bruises on you?   yes, from getting my blood drawn so much recently.  the iv left a good one. have you had sex today?   girl, i wish. has the last person you kissed ever made you cry?   plenty of times. be honest with yourself, are you proud of your actions?   some yes, some no.  it just.  varies.  for the most part, i guess so, like i can't deny i'm a fighter, but i just feel weak sometimes. if you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be?   honestly, i would get a tiny heart on the side of my face if it wasn't for societal standards and the strong odds of unemployment for having a tat on my face. what is something you find romantic?   flowers, picnics, walks in the park, oh man, i could go on for HOURS.  you can make SO many things romantic. what makes you attracted to the person you like right now?   his personality. what, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?   rape is #1 for me.  just don't. would you rather live in a castle or a spaceship?   castle, hell yeah!! has someone ever made you a build-a-bear?   OMG NO I WOULD DIE THAT'D BE PRECIOUS what are your initials?   bmd, or bmcd if you want my catholic name. what is your definition of “having sex”?   penal-vaginal penetration. who was the last person you were “in a relationship with” on facebook (including anyone you may have put “in a relationship with” for a joke)?   jason. do you think a relationship with a 16-year-old girl and a 35-year-old man would work out? do you think age differences like that (when they’re under 18) should be legal?   they should absolutely not be legal.  just... no.  i don't support big age gaps like that. what do you think of open relationships? if your partner suggested it, what would you say?   HA.  no.  and if he suggested it, i'd leave his ass. would you ever date out of your race?   mhmm. have you ever had a reptile for a pet?   i've had one lizard, two snakes. what kinds of alcohol do you like?   only ever tried mike's hard lemonade and smirnoff, and both are fine. did you have a swing set when you were a kid?   yup. state you most want to visit?   utah.  fucking gorgeous. were you popular in high school?   definitely not. would you rather be blind or deaf?   blind, definitely.  i once asked jason this and he said blind, too, "because i have to be able to hear your voice." ;;;-;;; where do you want to live when you are old?   in the mountains, in the woods, in the chilly weather, pls. have you ever been in love?   absolutely.  with reckless abandon. have you ever caught a fish?   many many times. what was your most recent ex’s middle name?   alex. do you put anything weird on your scrambled eggs? (like syrup)   just hot sauce. what is your states minimum wage?   $7.25, save us.

[ladylexile]

Tagged by @b name/nickname: Hanners

relationship status: soooo married. My goodness, he’s great. favorite color: Yellow: big bursts of sunshine yellow and splashes of that rich mustard yellow and splatters of cozy butter yellow all day forever please.

last song I listened to: “Graceland" Paul Simon makes me laugh and is required road trip music on all *official family business*

favorite TV show: Galavant makes me weak. Omg. The songs, the tropes, the nonexistent fourth wall. It’s pure magic from start to end.

first fandom: Harry Potter- I am just a lurker though. I love to read and ponder headcanons with outsized seriousness.

hobbies: Reading obscene amounts, making up parody songs for my toddler, crocheting, starting massive projects when I have no time

books that i’m currently reading: Power of a Phrase. Beautiful bite sized wisdom. Telling the Truth. ( a Fascinating book. Subtitled “the gospel as tragedy comedy and fairy tale” )I also just picked up this France’s Hodges book I didn’t know existed so pumped for that. Oh and 14 renditions of the dinosaur book a day for the little man.

worst thing I’ve ever eaten: A funeral feast out in the village I grew up in. Roasted mountain lion, snake soup, and snails in the shell. Plus everyone was hammered on rice whiskey so things got weird fast.

favorite place(s): My aunts ranch- the type of place where your heart rate drops just pulling into the driveway. There’s space and food and good company and so much love in there. My mountains at home! Haven’t seen them in years but I miss waking up under the shadows. The family pike where my husband and baby all climb in the couch and we watch cartoons and snuggle.

[choupetit]

GOT Recap:  The Dragon and the Wolf

Airdate:  8/27/17 ; Season 7, Episode 7

Are you really gonna leave us like this, GOT…and for over a year, no less?!  Day-um, that’s cold.  The Game of Thrones writers have always known how to leave us wanting more with their season finale cliffhangers, and this year they’ve upped the ante - or should I say “auntie”? We got a superb episode with some fabulous twists, schemes galore, and a major game-changing ending.  Let’s all huddle in close for a finale recap of “The Dragon & the Wolf”:

The Lion’s Den

 It’s time for the great Westerosi Peace Summit in King’s Landing.  The formidable Unsullied army stands at the ready outside the city gates while the Lannister army is preparing to welcome their visitors from House Targaryen and House Stark…by stocking up on barrels of hot pitch and sharpening their swords.  Ya know, just in case talks don’t go so well. From a distance we hear the raucous battle cries of warriors and the Dothraki come galloping in to join Team Dany’s troops.

Tyrion Lannister and Jon Snow approach by ship and Jon wonders how many people inhabit King’s Landing – it's about 1 million. Jon remarks that’s more than all the Northern houses put together. There’s no sign of Dany, who has apparently made separate arrangements for her arrival at King’s Landing.  Perhaps that 1M population is about to take a sudden and significant downturn?

The Hound goes to check on a chest in one of the lower decks.  The box is completely silent – aw, man, did their snow zombie die in transit?   He gives the box a hefty kick and we hear some vicious snarling.  Whew!  

As Cersei Lannister readies herself to meet her guests, she reminds  Frankenmountain of some final instructions: If things go south and she gives the word, he is to kill Dany, Tyrion, and Jon – in that specific order before disposing of anybody else.  After that, it’s Greggy’s choice.  Ya know, it’s really important to give your employees a sense of independence when working for you, and Cersei is clearly nailing it in the morale department.

 Tyrion and Jon arrive ashore and are greeted by Bronn, who is quite the welcoming host.  He lets them know their pals have already arrived and steps aside, gesturing to Brienne of Tarth and Podrick – it’s a short and sweet reunion for Tyrion and his former squire.  As Bronn escorts the party to the Dragon Arena, he shares a few bro words with Tyrion.

 Meanwhile, Brienne and the Hound come face to face and it’s slightly awkward.  Brienne justifies why she fought him in the Eyrie (and nearly killed him) - she was only trying to honor her oath to protect Arya.  The Hound says that was his intention as well, and suddenly the two are gushing nonstop about how proud they are of the little killing machine Arya has become.  “Aw, shucks, our homicidal baby has really come into her own!” #MentorAChild

 As they all arrive in the arena, Tyrion gives a brief history on dragon-keeping, noting that back in the days of the Targaryen dynasty, dragons were too much of a liability to roam free, so the arena was built to house them.  Living in captivity for generations caused the majestic creatures to languish until eventually they only ever grew to be as big as dogs.  

Team Dany and Jon take their seats – I must’ve missed the part where Theon was invited to the party, 'cause he’s there, too.  Great. Just what we need, more Greyjoys. Speaking of, Euron Greyjoy is in attendance, throwing crazy eyes at anybody who looks his way.

Queen Cersei arrives with her entourage of Qyburn, Jaime and the Mountain and everybody looks like they are standing on a live wire.  Dany is still nowhere to be found as they wait, uncomfortably.  

The Hound looks his brother square in the eye, tells him he's super fugly now, and then dashes all fans’ hopes for Cleganebowl – the ultimate Clegane showdown – when he says something cryptic along the lines of “Don’t worry, bro, we’re not gonna fight.  We both already know how you’re really gonna die.” What does it MEAN?  The Hound stalks away and vanishes into the lower level of the arena.

Finally there is a loud dragon cry and Queen Dany comes soaring in on Drogon.  This gal certainly likes to make an entrance. You’d think it would get old seeing Danaerys ride in on her dragon every episode, but it’s actually totes sweet and mucho impressive.  She lands while Cersei glares contemptfully:  “She’s got a kick-ass dragon, a huge army, AND she’s gorgeous?!  Next you’ll tell me that she also likes to sleep with her family members!” Ugh, Cersei just hates prettier, awesomer versions of herself. Dany for her part is all “Oh heeeey! I woke up like this.  So…did I miss anything important?”

Getting right down to business:  Euron starts things off with some petty baiting of Theon and tells him that he’s going to kill Theon’s sis, Yara.  When Tyrion interrupts him to address more important matters, Euron continues to be the boisterous a-hole he is, until Cersei tells him to STFU.

Jon takes the floor and tells Cersei about all the crappiness going on up North with Whitewalkers, the Night King and his Army of Dead.  He informs her they are all in for the fight of their lives…even...for life itself.  

 But since seeing is believing, a wight demonstration is the best thing to convince Queen Cersei.  The Hound comes back from the basement, hoisting the enormous crate on his back and sets it in the middle of the arena and ever so carefully…he opens the lid.  Nothing. Nothing at all happens.  “Oh maaaaaaan!  I swear, it was doing this weird snarling, screeching thing the WHOLE time at home!”  A smug sneer passes over Cersei’s face.  The Hound kicks the crate over.  Like a bat out of hell, the snow zombie pops out, snarling and snapping, and runs full-speed straight at Cersei whose expression turns to horror.  Just as the Frankenmountain steps forward to protect his queen, the snow zombie stops short – it’s chained to the crate and has reached the end of its tether.  The Hound chops off its arm and Qyburn’s face lights up with curiosity as the disembodied hand continues to move.  Ooooh, imagine all the amazing lab tests he could do!  I’ll bet if he tried hard enough he could give Jaime Lannister a hand transplant with this new scientific discovery!  Next, Jon introduces the only methods they know to kill the zombie: fire and dragon glass.

Euron asks if the creatures can go through water. Jon says no and Euron goes “I’ve seen some crazy shiz-nit out at sea, but this is the one thing that terrifies me.  I’m out!  Namaste, mofos! Have fun fighting the zombies!” He hauls butt out of the arena to wait things out on the Iron Isles.

Cersei speaks up. Yeah, Euron’s a coward, but pretty much rightfully, so.  That demo was seriously creepy, but it’s made a believer out of her. She says she is ready to have her forces step down and she’ll agree to a truce until the Night King and his army are defeated – on once condition:  Jon and the North must submit to Cersei as their queen.   Dany gives Jon a subtle nod, and then Jon completely craps the bed and goes “Nah, see…I can’t do that ‘cause I already have a queen.”   Cersei replies, “Ok, cool.  Well, then you losers are on your own – we’ll take our chances and see what happens after the North gets hit.  See ya!”  And she saunters out with her posse.  Tyrion nad Dany are both like “Ugh, you BLEW it!” Jeez Louise, Jon!!!  Dany already likes you, Bro, you don’t have to impress her anymore.  Learn to lie to your enemies already!   But Jon’s got ideals to a fault, y’all.  And isn’t that why we love him?

Brienne briefly takes Jaime aside and goes “Dude, seriously, you have to change her mind.”  Cersei sees the exchange and shoots daggers at Brienne with her eyes.

 Tyrion decides he’s the only one who can talk any sense into Cersei.  He grabs his balls and heads to the Red Keep for a one-on-one with his dear sis.  As he is escorted to Cersei’s office, Frankenmountain looms behind him and I just keep expecting to see his head suddenly lobbed off, but surprisingly, this doesn’t happen. When Tyrion arrives outside Cersei’s door, Jaime is standing outside and goes “Yeeee-ah, she just threw me out.  So, good luck with that.”

 Once inside Cersei’s chambers, she shows her usual disdain for Tyrion and tells him that Myrcella and Tommen are dead, indirectly because of him – because by killing their father, it screwed them all over.  Tyrion is all “OMG, I can’t take your whining anymore about how much you hate me!  If you wanna kill me, just do it and get it over with, but you know I loved those two kids.”  He pours himself a glass of wine and then pours one for Cersei.  She just slightly smirks and doesn’t take the glass.  Holy hell, is there poison in the wine??? IS THERE??? Nope, that’s just my GOT PTSD acting up again.  

 Cersei tells Tyrion how she was freaked out by the nasty zombie demo earlier, but that it didn’t make her want to save humanity…just herself and her family, and it suddenly dawns on Tyrion that she’s preggers.

 Time out!  Cersei is sleeping with her twin brother, but she’s worried that WINE is the thing that might mess up her growing baby?  Ok.  Cool, just wanted to be sure we were all on the same page.  Back to the action.

At the arena, Jon and Dany are kicking up dust and Dany’s all “Soooo, how much do you like me? Do you totally wanna make a gazillion babies with me, because even though we haven’t even been on a single date, I want to keep telling you that there is no way, literally NO WAY I can have kids.  Like, I’m saying the Wall would have to crumble down before this could ever happen.” Instead of running for the hills Jon’s all “Oh yeah, says who?” - “Just some witch who killed the last dude that I truly loved.”  

Their chat is cut short as Tyrion returns and a few seconds later, Cersei re-enters the arena with her crew.  She tells them she’s in.  Her men won’t stand down, rather, they will join Dany and Jon in their fight against the Night King.   “P.S. Try to remember this moment when we all defeat the White Walkers and you want to come back and de-throne me.”  Um, sorry, Cersei, you don’t get some special trophy for doing the right thing, which is also incidentally what’s in your best interest.  But, ok, I’m gonna give her minor props for finally being reasonable and getting on board to join forces against their common enemy.

 All About Baelish

 At Winterfell, Littlefinger meets with Sansa, who is thoroughly freaked out by her last meeting with Arya.  Littlefinger settles into a chair and begins his latest lesson in Paranoia 101: “Ya know, there’s this little game I like to play when I can’t figure out somebody’s motives.  I assume the worst and then ask myself how likely that assumption is.” And we wonder why nobody ever asks Littlefinger to join in any reindeer games.  He walks Sansa through his little hypothetical exercise, and by the end he’s got Sansa considering the worst case scenario wherein Arya wants to turn all the Northern lords against her, kill her for betraying her family, and become the new Lady of Winterfell.  At this point, I just wanna yell at the screen “OMG, can you not see he is playing you, Sansa? We all know that Arya DGAF about being the lady of anything, much less Winterfell!” Where the heck is Bran with his voyeur abilities to step in already?  

Come Sail Away

 Back at Dragonstone, Dany et al have returned from their King’s Landing visit and they gather in the war room to discuss next steps.  They plan to head to Winterfell, and Jon will take a ship to White Harbor and then take the King’s Road to get home.  “Cool, sounds fun! Count me in!”, chirps Dany.  Poor Ser Jorah is like “Khaleesi, why would you wanna be in close quarters with a strapping young  hero like Jon, when you could just fly Drogon there?  It’s safer, it’s quicker, there are no hunky distractions, and – oh heck, for the love of everything that is holy would you please just LOVE MEEEEEEE!!!!!” “Nah, I’m going on the boat. Thanks for your counsel. Now which of these nightgowns looks hotter?  Asking for a friend.”

As Jon walks through the throne room at Dragonstone, Theon gives him the old “I have extremely low self-esteem” spiel that’s we’ve become so familiar with. “You’re so much better than me, I’m garbage, please forgive me for all the crap I’ve pulled with your family. Ya know, Yara was the only one who ever stood up for me when Ramsay kept me as his punching bag prisoner.” “Hey, dude, I can’t absolve you for all the awful things you’ve done, but for the stuff that I can…I forgive you.  We’re semi-cool.  Stop wasting time and go save your sister.”

Theon heads to shore where the Good Grejoy team members are readying a boat and he tells them they have to go save Yara from the Bad Greyjoys.  The leader of the bunch tells him she’s as good as dead and there’s no way they are going to take on Crazy Euron. Theon goes for classic prison yard strategy and starts a fight with the biggest, baddest guy of the bunch.  He gets the stuffing beat out of him…until the man unknowingly activates Theon’s superpower by kicking Theon in the crotch.  This somehow gives Theon the edge to fight back and kill the dude.  That’s right, in order to grow a set of metaphorical balls, one must first be kicked where actual balls used to be.  It’s basic anatomy, folks.  All the other men cheer for Theon and are now on board to save Yara. Oh, Iron Islanders, your loyalties are so fickle!

Heaven Help The Mister

 Back at Winterfell, Sansa orders her guards to find Arya and bring her to the Great Hall.  When Arya walks in, the room is lined with the Knights of the Vale and Sansa and Bran sit at the big table.  Arya sizes up the room as Littlefinger smirks from the sidelines. “You sure you wanna do this, sis?” Sansa looks at her little sister, stone-faced and begins, “You’re accused of murder and treason.  How do you answer…Lord Baelish?” Ooooh, snap!  The look on Littlefinger’s face is priceless as he stammers “Wait, what?” Sansa rattles off a list of offenses, including Littlefinger’s hand in killing John Aryn, Lyssa Aryn, and the betrayal of Ned Stark.  Littlefinger objects “You can’t prove that! Nobody saw anything that happened!” and all eyes in the room turn to Bran.  LOL! Sansa hands down his death sentence, and Littlefinger grovels and begs for his life like the rat that he is.  Arya unsheaths the catspaw dagger and in one fell swoop, expertly cuts his throat open.  WOOT! The Stark siblings were in on the ruse all along!  Whew, what a relief, and also, how cathartic to see Littlefinger finally get his due after all his cons and schemes!  

 At the Red Keep, Jaime is strategizing with some soldiers on their plans to head North to fight the Night King.  Cersei interrupts and asks for a word alone. “What are you doing, bro?”  Jaime’s slightly confused. “Um…I’m getting ready to deploy the troops. Obviously.” Cersei smiles and goes “Yeah, that’s not happening. I lied.  We’re getting mercenaries from Braavos and are going to take over Westeros while those idiots fight the Army of Dead.  And if they defeat the Army of Dead, cool – we’ll have fewer Targaryens and Starks to kill.  BTW Euron didn’t flee to the Iron Islands – he’s going to pick up our hired guns as we speak.”  Jaime is dumbstruck and goes “Not cool.  I made an oath and I’m keeping it.” Cersei threatens to have Frankenmountain kill Jaime if he walks away from her, but he calls her bluff and leaves, unharmed. …And somewhere out there, even though Brienne doesn’t know why, her heart skips a beat. I mean.  I’m just guessing.

We see Jaime on horseback just outside of King’s Landing and snow begins to fall.  

An Inconvenient Truth

 Meanwhile, Samwell, Gilly, and Little Sam have made it to Winterfell and Sam pays Bran a visit in his room.  Bran sits fireside in his usual dream-like, emotionless state and tells Sam he remembers when Sam helped him and his pals after they crossed North of the wall.  Then he tells Sam how he’s the three-eyed raven and how he really needs to tell Jon who his real parents are: Lyanna Stark and Rhaegar Targaryen.  Oh, and his name should really be Jon Sand, because that’s what they call bastards in Dorne.  “Hold up! I don’t have time to give credit to my girlfriend for this discovery, but actually…Jon is legit!  I read it in a book by the dude who annulled Rhaegar’s first marriage and secretly married Lyanna and Rhaegar!”  Oh come on, Bran!  You really didn’t know that?  You made all these discoveries about Jon, but never bothered to get a tiny bit more back-story? Hold that thought! Bran does a quick warging fact-check of Samwell’s info and jumps back in time to a sweet private wedding ceremony with Lyanna and Rhaegar happily reciting their vows and kissing.  

 Bran remarks that Robert’s Rebellion was based on a lie.  His aunt was never abducted or raped by Rhaegar – they were in love and she ran off with him, willingly.  There is another cut to young Ned Stark when he finds Lyanna after childbirth and she tells him Jon’s real name:  Aegon Targaryen.

As Bran speaks over the action, we cut to the Love Boat that is sailing North with Jon and Dany.  Jon walks the corridor to Dany’s room and gives a knock on the door.  She opens and invites him in. As Jon enters her room, we see a figure down the hall – it’s Tyrion, watching gravely. “Ugh, I told her not to mix business with pleasure.”  What follows is a steamy love scene that makes me wanna vomit everywhere, because as everybody just seems to dismiss: Dany is Jon’s auntie, and even if they don’t know that yet, it’s still nass-to-tha-tay.

 Back at Winterfell, Sansa and Arya have a sweet bonding moment as they watch the snow fall harder outside.  

Bran wargs again, checking on things up North and what he sees ain’t good.  Dondarrion and Tormund are in one of the Eastwatch towers, when they look below and notice the Army of Dead have arrived at the Wall.  We see a handful of Whitewalkers leading the charge on horseback.  From the snowy cloudcover above emerges Viserion, now a zombie ice dragon – with the Night King riding on his back.  Oh, no.  Tormund yells for his men to evacuate the wall and they all rush down the ladders as Viserion blows out a stream of blue flames and begins to burn a hole into the side of the wall.  Chunks of the wall begin to break and soon enough, all of Eastwatch crumbles down.  Viserion continues to melt the ice and snow until a ginormous opening  paves the way for the Army of Dead to march right through the wall.  They slowly advance Southward as the camera zooms out.  Roll credits.

 Wow, what an episode and what an ending! How do you bounce back from that?  I know the characters have been saying this pretty much the last few episodes but…they are seriously screwed.  Fo’ realz.  Will the North just be obliterated?  Did Tormund and Dondarrion survive (we all want to see Tormund and Brienne make babies!) – heck, did anybody survive?  At least Bran saw it all and can sound the alarms immediately, but man, they are gonna have to act fast.

 So happy that Jaime finally distanced himself from his toxic sis.  Now he can warn the others of her plans – but how can they fight an enemy from the North and the South at the same time?  One thing’s for sure: We’re gonna have more Brienne and Jaime scenes in our future!  Huzzah!

 Once Jon and Dany realize they are related, I hope they’ll quit having relations.  That said, I’ve got a strong feeling that their one night of passion is going to result in a baby.  Maybe all Dany needed was another Targaryen to knock her up – after all, the Targaryen’s are all about keeping their bloodlines pure.  Hopefully, with this revelation, Dany won’t feel too threatened about who should be on the throne.  And we’re all fairly certain that Jon is going to get to ride Rhaegal, right?  #surething

 Considering that we’ve got until 2019 before we get any new Game of Thrones, I’m sure there will be oodles of fan theories to ponder.  I’m hoping for some kind of dragon sex-change so they can make more baby dragons.  Hey, it happened in Jurassic Park!  Will we have two pregnant queens waging war against each other?  Is Cersei even really pregnant, of was she lying to manipulate Jaime? Will Bran warg into Viserion or the Night King and end everything? Aaaaack, so many options!  It’s time to wrap this up, so hold tight until the new season begins, my dears, and take comfort knowing that the new episodes are all supposed to be like 80+ minutes each, so we will really be getting little mini-movies each episode…and isn’t that worth the wait?  

[coordinatesofher]

WALKING IN A DESERT WONDERLAND

I had been traveling quite a bit for a few months at this point, back to back, with little breaks in between. I had just made it back into LA only to stay a few days before taking a red eye to New Orleans for Christmas break. I had been working around the clock and was utterly burnt out, but despite my tired eyes, I gathered myself together for a dinner that my sister had arranged. It was a meeting with a designer that she was convinced I needed to help me with COH°.

I was drowning in article ideas, content creation, and company expansion prospects. I had a vision and lots of dreams, but I was a one woman show... an exhausted one at that. But, here I was sitting across from this talented young creative, Macie Menard. Even with my brain working at half capacity, it was easy to see that she was bright, smart, and a hard worker. Also, she had a calming spirit about her which was a great yin to my crazy yang. 

There was never a lull in the conversation. We hit it off. We had a lot in common in terms of interests, design aesthetic, and website ideas. And, most importantly, she loved food. We spent at least an hour just discussing our favorite foods and restaurants. That was all I needed to know. She was my kind of people. I was thoroughly impressed with her. My sister had been right. Macie was my girl. 

I offered her a job and a trip to Los Angeles the following month. I knew I would know everything I needed to know about her if I traveled with her. And, of course, for better or for worse, she would learn a lot about me and how I work and travel. Soooo, we set out on a weekend adventure together and did everything from mountain hikes to greenhouse exploring in the desert. Needless to say, the road trip was a blast, and we have continued to work together for the past 7 months.

I have come to discover that not only is Macie an incredible designer and a brilliant talent, but she is also a constant source of light in my life. Every Monday, without fail, we send each other long emails that we now affectionately call our "Coffee Chats." We basically both rant about life, the past weekend, ideas for the website, or random things that are inspiring us. I have come to look forward to those emails and to our weekly Skype chats about design and content creation.

Most of the graphics on this website are ideas that we both collaborate on together. Then, Macie makes them all magically come to life. Aside from graphic designing, she has also developed article ideas like our upcoming "Beauty Buys" article, and she has helped me in countless other ways to grow COH°. I have never thought of her as an employee. In my mind, she is a colleague and a friend that I work with on this vision we have come to define together.

Suffice to say, I was completely delighted to sit down and chat with her about our deep love for Los Angeles, working together at COH°, and, of course, our adventure weekend last February. Exploring California and visiting the Cactarium together was the pinnacle of everything we have come to stand for at COH°... "road trips, friendships, and a damn good plant photo." Yep, I just found my life's mantra. I'm going to need that on a t-shirt ASAP. Anyway, read more from us below!

xoxo,

KB

Here is my interview with Macie Menard on her thoughts about LA culture, California adventures, and, of course, the Cactarium:

Can you tell our readers a little about yourself?

I'm a self-taught graphic designer living in Louisiana. I'm married to my best friend/favorite travel buddy, and we have an English Bulldog named Ivy...who eats EVERYTHING.

How did you end up in California?

Well, it didn’t take much convincing. I had just recently joined the COH° team, so I made the trip out to LA in order to get to know my new boss a little more...well a lot more haha!

Girl, we got to know each really well within the first 20 mins of you being in LA. It is a hilarious story, but, we will keep it just between us for now! (lol)

Yeah, it was definitely an ice breaker!

So, I can't remember, had you been to Cali before?

Oh yes. I was there almost 2 years ago, but this visit made me emotional. When I flew into Los Angeles the sun was setting and the sky was pink. I literally shed a tear and thought: 'I would move here in a heartbeat. It feels like home.' 

I feel that every time I land. I completely understand. It is such a weird, quirky city, but for whatever reason, it’s the place I feel the most at home or the most myself rather. You know my vote on you moving. 

Yes, I know! It's more than a feeling (unintentional Journey reference about my journey to LA). For lack of a better word, LA is so inspiring. I love the city. Most people are disenchanted with the noise, traffic jams, and overpopulation, but I can totally look past all that. I like being in the mix of it all, but still being invisible in the crowds and in my own little world.

Honestly, that is my favorite part too. Nothing makes me happier than going to the grocery store and no one knows who I am. That anonymity is something I have come to love. What else is it about LA that really just sprinkles your donuts?

I also like that if you need a get away or want a change of scenery, it's just a drive and/or hike away. I still can't believe that the first morning in LA, I was hiking a mountain. In the afternoon, I was walking on a beach. The very next day we were snow tubing up in the mountains, and by that night we were in the desert and on the outskirts of Palm Springs. Mind. Blown.

Yeah, I definitely kept you on-the-go. You got a true 'Kristi Bailey - COH° experience'!

And, I loved every minute of it!

So, speaking of Palm Springs.... let's chat about the Cactarium!

OH! It was like walking in a desert version of Alice in Wonderland! 

Thats a great way to describe it actually. I love that. It was such a wonderfully weird place.

Oh yes. I was in heaven. Shoutout and a huge “thank you!” to the amazing Anna Gumpert for finding this place. There were cacti and succulents everywhere.

Some people might say that it was plantastic. 

Yes, some people who love dad jokes. (I'm sure most dad's wouldn't miss the opportunity to say plantastic. #CactusJokesOnPoint) Oh, that reminds me, I love that within our first 24 hours together, we spent time planting succulents on your rooftop patio. It was my kind of bonding experience!

We planted so many plants that afternoon. And, I’ve only managed to kill half of them so thats a big win for me. I’m sad I lost the others. It really succs... see what I did there ;) Don't worry. I've got plenty more where that came from. Anyway, it was nice to share my succulent obsession with someone with an equal or possibly greater obsession.

My obsession actually started at a young age. My great-grandmother had a gigantic pot of Echeveria. I had never seen a plant like it before. I sat there in awe as she cracked open a petal to show me it’s jelly-like filling and shared with me the perks of it’s low-maintenance and reproducing nature. It was then that I decided that when I grew up, I wanted to be a plant lady.

I actually lost you a few times in the gardens. You were totally in your element.

I really loved it there. When we got to the end of our journey through the cacti forest, there was a nursery with a selection of plants for sell. Of course, I had to get plants to go! The owner and his wife were there to give us the history of his father’s garden. They also assured me that my mini plants were allowed on the plane. (Travel tip: Plants are allowed to fly out of California, but not in.)

Yes, you can take anything on a plane out of Cali, but you can't bring things into the state. It functions as its own country in that way. Once, I saw a woman carry a whole raw Trader Joes turkey on a plane out of LA so I'm thinking a succulent is fine. Anyway, were you nervous about taking the plants in flight?

I was still a nervous wreck, and did not want to get my plants taken away from me, so I wrapped them up and hid them in my laptop bag for the whole flight. They made it home, and I still have one healthy cactus to start my future cactarium. 

OMG! Please start one!!! That would be both hilarious and amazing. Anyway, thank you for chatting with me! I’m so glad you “pricked” to be a part of the COH° team. It feels great to go from a 'cacti to a cactus.'

Honestly, ‘aloe’ working with you. Let’s stick together.

I do wish you lived here. Everything succs without you.

I will never desert you.

Wow. We are such succas' for plant puns! Macie, thank you so much for taking the time to chat about our experience at the Cactarium. I know we both loved it. Let's start planning our next adventure! I'm thinking passport this time! COH° gotta get those stamps!