#sometimes you gotta spend 6 months rewriting the ending you thought you figured out a year ago

[wwillywonka]

good news i finally figured out the ending for heaven on their minds so expect a new chapter in the coming week

[alfredolover119]

I looooove your zukka rec lists! I recently became Avatar-obsessed, never got a chance to watch it as a kid and only just got through it all! I was wondering if you'd consider doing a specifically angst rec list? I love fluffy zukka everything, but sometimes you just gotta have your heart ripped out of your chest and put back in after being thoroughly blended.

thank you! i relate heavily to “recently became Avatar-obsessed” haha. as for the angst list, i sure can try! warning: all of these have happy endings because im a crybaby who can’t read unhappy endings. also, p much all of the fics in the completed section were featured on my other lists but this is specifically the ANGSTY ones >:^)

angsty zukka wips

first, most obviously, feels like we only go backwards by @oldpotatoe

-currently at 102k with 19/27 chapters posted; rated teen

-the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. you know. i haven’t actually read it yet because, as previously mentioned, i’m a crybaby and am waiting for it to finish up but, from my understanding, this fic will murder you in a dark alleyway with no remorse. if u like zukka angst, you’ve probably already read this, but just in case!

An injury leaves Sokka with amnesia. His last memory is of the failed invasion, of leaving his father behind in enemy territory on the Day of Black Sun. Of hopelessness. Rage. // But then he wakes up, and the war is over. Suddenly, he must come to terms with the fact that years have passed, and that he's somehow the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. He is also supposedly friends with banished-Prince-turned-Fire-Lord Zuko, of all people. Close friends.

Yeah, nah.

and i’ll do anything you say (if you say it with your hands) by @goldrushzukka

-currently 38k with 6/8 chapters posted; rated mature

-holy shit. holy SHIT. modern au based on the “my cat likes my fuckbuddy and i am falling in love” trope(?). maybe it’s just because of how the last chapter ended, but oh my god. this one made me cry. made me want to commit violence. when it’s not angsty as hell, it’s pretty funny, but holy shit. ao3 user nebulastucky please.

It’s supposed to be a one night stand. Pick up some guy at a bar, barely remember his name and never learn anything real about him, send him packing in the morning with a thanks for the ride and a cup of coffee to-go. That’s how it’s supposed to go. // But then it’s the best sex Sokka has ever had, and he thinks he’ll hate himself if he never gets to have it again.

Violet Blossoms and Celestial Objects by @hollypunkers

-currently 15k with 2/? posted. rated teen.

-this is the sequel to blue (an angsty, zukka rewrite of book 2-- go read it if u havent!)! !! this is a book 3 rewrite. only two chapters in and mrs hollypunkers is really abusing the miscommunication tag, as zukka writers seem to enjoy doing. im excited to see how the world and story develops with the changes to the story! you should be too!! its very good! obviously spoilers for blue lmao

Having sided with the Avatar in Ba Sing Se, Zuko not only must navigate his new relationship with Sokka but returning to the Fire Nation as a banished enemy. His own journey of self discovery and personal growth must now coexist alongside the personal struggles of every other member of the Gaang as together they blaze a treacherous path toward an unsure victory against Zuko's own father and nation.

breakable heaven by @fruitysokka

-currently 71k with 9/11 chapters posted. rated teen

-swt ambassador zuko! soon to be chief sokka! fake dating ur best friend to get out of an arranged marriage! what could go wrong!!! i also haven’t read this one ((see: i’m a crybaby who is being hurt by too many zukka wips already)), but it has been hanging out in my marked for later for months. from what i understand, this fic has: angst.

With his twenty-first birthday looming just around the corner, the Southern Water Tribe Elders have decided that Sokka, next in line to be Chief, needs to get married. Sokka does not want that, but he does need to get them off his back until he can figure his way out of it. What better way to do that than to pretend to date his best friend (and newly minted Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe) Zuko? // Seriously, this is a foolproof plan. Maybe one of Sokka's best. Absolutely nothing can go wrong.

angsty zukka fics (completed!)

(i’ll put these in wc order)

lighthouse beam by @incorrectzukka

-7k, rated g

-a modern college au!! zuko’s inner-monologue is very angsty in this fic. typical zuko. also per usual, theyre both fucking dorks. they sort themselves out in the end, but not before The Angst. zuko is semi-deaf in this fic and also he has a bit of internalized homophobia.

Sokka’s breathtakingly beautiful and he’s smart and makes other people laugh. Zuko has a half-burnt face and a deaf ear. It’s not rocket science. // Or, Zuko falls in love with the boy in his Philosophy class.

This Isn’t My Idea of Fun by @khaleeseas

-9k, explicit

-moon spirit/nwt prince!sokka, no war to be found here! admittedly this isnt THAT angsty but like. the angst IS present. zuko is still the prince. a lovely childhood friends (though they hated each other for a minute haha) to lovers story. 

If you asked Zuko, he and Azula saw far too much of Chief Hakoda of the Northern Water Tribe’s children growing up. It wasn’t until they were older, and Azula pointed out that - duh - their families were trying to set them all up, that he realized why. // He was told by his mother to be polite. These people were their friends and allies, and though their nations were as different as they came, harmony between nations was the most important thing. // It wasn’t his fault the Chief’s children were so annoying.

put your lips close to mine (as long as they don’t touch) by @celestialceci

-9k, teen

-modern au! zuko and sokka are college roommates. zuko goes to spend the summer with sokka. again,, not really that angsty but-- its there!! the detail and feeling of Home in this story make me happy. zuko is insecure as hell here too. if ur into that. 

Zuko hates his home. He likes college alright, but he likes Sokka even better, his assigned roommate turned best friend. Spending the summer with Sokka will be fun, a welcome change of pace he desperately wants. It probably won't awaken anything in him... right?

the thing about dancing by anodymalion

-9k, teen

-yes. this one right here officer. it makes my heart ache. also trans sokka! which is cool. but the zuko angst in this one. hurts me. not so much relationship angst as it is zuko learning he deserves happiness angst. i’m sure u know The Type.

The first time a attendant spills Zuko’s tea and doesn’t immediately fall to her knees, begging the Fire Lord’s forgiveness, it is not anger but a resounding warmth that fills his chest.

i could (never) give you peace by @zukkababey

-10k, mature

-OUCH. OUCH OUCH OUCH. boys please learn to communicate im begging u. also zuko.. zuko, dude. as the tags of the fic say, hes “really going through it” in this one. YOUCH. post-canon.

Zuko almost said it. He almost said the words I think I’m in love with you, but he choked them back down at the last second. // Zuko would never be able to be what Sokka wanted. They might have needed each other during the summer, when two boys with too much weight on their shoulders found comfort in each other in the only way they knew how. // But now Zuko was Fire Lord, and Sokka was leaving.

this love burns so yellow (becoming orange and in its time, exploding) by @meliebee 

-18k, teen, major character death 

-i lied. THIS is the one, officer. found family.. good mai and zuko and toph friendships.. . ozai escapes prison and tries to overthrow zuko. OBVIOUSLY angst ensues. poor boy. he Does heal in this but it gets worse before it gets better. angst angst angst angst.

Ten months after Zuko is crowned at seventeen, he faces his first coup.

Anything for You by beersforqueers

-23k, explicit

-istg. this is probably one of my favorite zukka fics. its PAINFUL. modern au where theyre broken up but sokka hasnt told his family yet so zuko goes home with him for kataang wedding. a bit smutty, but the plot oh my god ohgm y fuvk. made me cry the first time i read it. (see: crybaby!me) insert that one picture of the horse with the caption PAIN. 

In which Sokka and Zuko have broken up but Sokka hasn't told his family yet. So when Katara and Aang's wedding weekend rolls around and he doesn't want to break Gran-Gran's heart, he asks Zuko to pretend to be his boyfriend for one last weekend. // Things don't go as planned.

Moving Mountains by @thefangirlingdead

-64k, mature

-so. when i read this the first time it was in one sitting. soulmate au set within canon era / the comics, to an extent. soulmates can hear each others thoughts. i will happily say this is slowburn, jesus christ. champagne without the cham. 

Soulmates are chosen by the spirits and can hear each other’s thoughts. Sokka thinks it’s cheesy and dumb. Zuko thinks it’s poetic justice that he doesn’t have one because he doesn’t deserve it. Cruel irony is finding out that the prince of the Fire Nation (and the person currently hunting you) is your soulmate.

In the Soft Light by @voidcenturyscholar and @romancedawning

-83k, teen, graphic depictions of violence

-moon spirit!sokka living in the northern water tribe. zuko is sent to the northern water tribe as a cultural liaison. iroh is the fire lord but while he is away taking care of lu ten after his injury ozai steps up. i cannot express how many emotions this fic made me feel. background yuetara. i would almost say found family?? but. anyway. plenty of angst to spare here with a healthy dose of enemies to friends to lovers.

As the newly appointed cultural liaison to Northern Water Tribe, Zuko is the first Fire Nation Citizen to step foot inside the city's walls in nearly a century. He's determined to prove himself—to the Fire Lord and to his father—even if the Water Tribe's spirit-touched prince seems to want nothing to do with him.

That Midnight Sky by @zukkababey

-103k, teen

-now now now. tms... modern college au where sokka agrees to tutor zuko in physics because zuko has to maintain straight a’s and physics is just not doing it for him. so. thats cool but THEN azula moves in, randomly, with zuko. to hide the fact that sokka is tutoring zuko, they fake date! what could go wrong!! the mutual pining in here combined with the angst... wonderful, tasty. everyone read it rn. also SLOWBURN 

In Zuko’s strict family, needing a tutor is just about the worst thing you could do. Failing a class, however, is even worse. The only rational solution? Take up Aang on his offer to find him a physics tutor and have Sokka—beautiful, smart, handsome Sokka—tutor him in secret. // When Azula’s arrival threatens to reveal Zuko’s secret, it’s up to Sokka to convince her this definitely isn’t what it looks like. See, he’s actually… Zuko’s… boyfriend? // Hmm. There’s no way this could get complicated, right?

[electricdazemag]

On Drugs: Tour Diary, Entries 3 & 4

words by Derek Housh, photo by Tasha Bielaga

Portland punkers On Drugs are hitting the road with The Frights and King Shelter for a long 30 wild, hot days. After releasing their debut album “Stay Yuck” and signing to  Postmark Records, the boys are ready to turn the U.S. upside down. We teamed up with lead vocalist and bassist Derek Housh to bring the world a first hand look at all the antics they’re getting themselves into.

“8/6/17

I'm still unsure of what the three days we just spent in Chicago will mean to me one day or what the lasting affects of what occurred will have on any of us. It's very strange being on this tour with The Frights and King Shelter. Richard from The Frights is actually a very good friend and produced our record, and I've been good friends with King Shelter for years. I've known their lead guitarist since I was in forth grade. It's not a question of us all getting along, but more so that both of those bands are on a very professional level where as we are some wildly dysfunctional psycho art punk band who spends a lot of time playing in grimey basements of Portland. I don't necessarily care about how professional I come off as a musician, I mean if I was being honest, I don't really consider myself a bassist or even a musician. Just a performer who figured out how to count and has a knack for singing. I love singing, it's my favorite. It's so fucking cathartic. Music made sense to start creating after film school because it gave me this whole performance outlet that making movies couldn't. I'd rather lose my ability to play an instrument than my ability to sing. But to get back to what I was saying, it's not that I really give a fuck if we are the laughing stock of this tour for how unprepared we come off as, but I am starting to see how maybe I wasn't ready for something on this level.  I wasn't expecting to feel so home sick. I miss my friends back in Portland terribly. I miss all the animals my friends have. I miss shitty Portland and smoking cigarettes with Aaron on the front porch of the Chokey. I miss clumsy Breezy baby drunkenly trying to front flip in the living room. I think everyone in this van pretty much feels this way.  I was very excited to finally see Chicago and we had three days off while The Frights played Lollapalooza. I paid fourteen dollars for a pack of cigarettes that I somehow made last the whole time. We walked around some cool places and saw some cool shit, and went to an art show which I loved. I was able to get hooked up with the wonderful Skylark who runs the Charm School house and they got us onto a show at their house. The show had a very small and extremely personal feel to it. I spoke a lot to the musician Supernova that played and turned out to be an amazing and beautifully kind person. Immediately after that show we swung over to this Hip Hop party that some rapper had King Shelter play with them. It was fucking wild to go from this totally relaxed art show to this totally poppin party. King Shelter got us on the VIP list which basically meant free fucking liquor for everyone. That's where things pretty quickly turned to shit. I had to carry Randy out of the party, and pretty quickly he and Cameron were wrestling in the streets. I honestly can't believe no one got arrested. I definitely had to restrain Randy and choke him out after he swung on me a bunch. I hate getting violent, it always makes me feel so fucking terrible but sometimes its inevitable and when your best friend is losing it in a city like Chicago while your other best friend is equally trashed, lost, and scared, and your standing over one unconscious friend and you're desperately trying to both find the other and figure out how to get both of them safely home. I felt like a mother who has to beat their kid in order to protect them. You'll pretty much do whatever it takes to either get them to calm down or at least just shut the fuck up so you can think. But somehow by some fucked off miracle, I found Cameron and got them both back to the hotel. I don't know what triggered Randy, but something caused Randy to grab his shit and leave once we got back. I begged him to stay but he told me to "Eat Shit" and that he was going to ride freight trains back to Portland. He had no shoes or phone when he left. So now were in Michigan, one week into this nightmare tour, and I really miss my best friend. But by some crazy chance, Randy just happen to run into the one person he knew in all of Chicago and was able to call me. He is unsure of what he is going to do but he is safe, already lifted some shoes off a Walmart, and has a friend with him who may or may not ride back with him to Portland or he might hitch hike and meet us somewhere.   So I just reread everything I just wrote for this entry, and I had to cover my mouth so no one in this van knew I was crying. I'm going to go buy some cigarettes and call Aaron.”

“8/8/17

So I wrote this whole entry, smoked a bowl, and decided to rewrite it after I read everything I had down. I cried pretty hard in Lansing, Michigan, on the phone with Aaron. I miss that kid. One of the most brilliant kids I know, he constantly is pushing me and we take turns being each other's therapist. It seemed pretty obvious that I must have been bummin after Chicago because our label owner came and talked to me before our show that day. He seems to really believe in us by the way he was speaking to me. Like I understand the situation and that he took a gamble on us, but the things he was saying felt more like a friend saying "I fucking believe in you." He told me he went on tour for five years back when he was the manager for Yellow Card. He said the homesickness is to be expected but that this shit ain't easy and you gotta keep fighting because we got some kids to blow away on this tour. What a crazy fucking time to be alive. I know it sounds cliché, but it was the halftime speech I needed to hear. Who would have thought that one of the best shows I've ever played would be in Lansing, Michigan. Looking at the town, I expected to play to no one. We ended up playing to something like a hundred and forty people all losing their fucking minds. People of all ages. Old ladies were buying our weed pentagram shirts. I side busted a Mac Demarco signature on some kids hat. Ive now met two people on this trip that tell me that the only time they've been to Portland they saw Mom Jeans play in some dirty basement to which my response is "THATS MY FUCKING HOUSE!" Small world, right?  

 We played Pittsburgh the next day and same thing. Packed room with kids losing their minds. Some girl told me she was gonna shave her head now. I swear to fucking god people were singing along with some of our songs. Like, what the fuck, the record has only been out for a little bit. Not even a month old. Pittsburgh has been my favorite town so far. It reminds me a lot of Portland. You'll be on one bridge looking at 4 other bridges. Sick architecture everywhere. And the whole city seems to just be engulfed in rolling hills and a ton of trees. Tonight we play Columbus. Everything is so green out here.”

On Drugs is on tour with The Frights and King Shelter until August 30th. This week they play:

8/8 Columbus, OH at Ace of Cups

8/10 Erie, PA at Basement Transmissions

8/11 Rochester, NY at German House 

8/12 Toronto, ON at Hard Luck

8/13 Montreal, QC at Bar Le Ritz