#sometimes push it to 7-8pm depending on life

[thetomorrowshow]

in a ship of glass - ch 2

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the second chapter of scott's prequel for my empires superpowers au! many apologies for the next chapter of poisoned rats not being out today, i am stuck on it and want to work a bit longer.

cw: brief violence/blood, mentioned past life in a cult

~

Scott’s nineteen, and he’s just been accepted to Empires City University.

Aeor cheers, pours himself a glass of champagne and pours Scott some sparkling cider. They toast, and Scott’s so excited that both glasses freeze.

He goes to apologize, but Aeor waves him off.

“No need, Scott,” he says genially. “It’ll melt, and be better for it.”

Scott looks at the acceptance letter again just to feel that flip of his heart, grins. Then a thought hits him.

“Aeor, I’m—I’m going to be away at school, in a dorm. What if. . . .” he trails off, not sure if he wants to finish his sentence. He still has bad days, days where he can’t help but feel he shouldn’t exist. Part of him wants to have those days, screams that those are a sign from God, that he needs to do what he needs to do and rid this world of another devil. 

He ought to tell someone about those thoughts in particular, but . . . he’s afraid. He’s afraid that if he shares, Aeor will think he’s not well enough to go to school. But that terrible part of him also doesn’t want to warn Aeor, doesn’t want him to ruin everything again.

Scott shakes himself. He’s passive. He’s passive, not active, and if he ever becomes active again, he’s got a support system and a plan in place. Besides, his therapist thinks school will be good for him.

“It’s hardly ‘away’, ECU,” Aeor says gently, taking a seat at the kitchen table. “A two hour drive or a twenty minute flight. And you can always call. As long as I’m not fighting crime, I’ll always pick up.”

Scott clenches his fists, then closes his eyes and runs through a breathing exercise—in for four, hold for seven, out for eight. Empires City University. He’s excited. He genuinely is—he’d managed to transfer his credits from those two semesters at Milford, so freshman year’s out of the way and he can hone in on a major.

ECU has an insane amount of options to choose from. He’s not sure what he wants his major to be quite yet—before, he’d always planned on ministry but he just can’t stand the idea of that now. Maybe computer science, or music, or chemistry! No, not chemistry, he’s too volatile for that. He can't imagine what would happen if he spontaneously froze some fluid that should under no circumstances be frozen.

He wants to ask Aeor if he ever went to college, and if so, what he majored in. The question that bursts out of his mouth, though, is, “Can I dye my hair?”

Aeor chuckles. “You don’t need to ask me permission, Scott. But of course you can.”

“Red,” Scott says instantly. “Natural red. My hair’s pretty much blond at this point, anyway. It won’t be hard. And I’ll buy the dye, too, you don’t have to worry about it.”

“I’ll handle the dye, it’s not a problem,” Aeor tells him. He runs a hand through his own hair. “I’ve been thinking of covering the grey myself. What say you to green?”

Scott snorts in spite of himself. “Please no. How about a highlighter shade of yellow? That neon look.”

Aeor laughs as well, takes the acceptance letter from Scott and sticks it to the fridge, right next to both the ECU magnet they’d received in the mail and Scott’s antidepressant prescription. He ought to draw something to be pinned on the fridge, like a child bringing home a school project. Anything to make it less depressing.

“Maybe I’ll be an art major,” he murmurs as the thought occurs. He’s always liked drawing, and painting even more. Aeor smiles, opens the fridge.

“What are you feeling for dinner?”

Scott almost answers with what he usually does—whatever you want, it doesn’t matter to me, etc. But for the first time in a long time, he wants to celebrate.

“Can we . . . maybe, er. Have breakfast for dinner? Like, bacon, and eggs, and all that?” Before he’s even finished speaking, Aeor has pulled the eggs out of the fridge.

“Pancakes or biscuits?”

Scott thinks for a moment. “Pancakes.”

Aeor reaches up onto the kitchen shelf, pulls down a cookbook. “There’s a breakfast food section, find the pancake recipe you like and get to work,” he says. “Just pull your hair back and wash your hands first.”

Maybe he can be a culinary major. He likes cooking, has liked it ever since Aeor introduced it as a way to keep his hands occupied.

Scott cries over dinner, of course. The bacon isn’t quite as crisp as his dad makes it, but the differences only serve to remind him that he’s not welcome at home and never will be. His parents probably wish him as dead as he sometimes wishes himself.

Maybe he can major in psychology. Become a therapist, help others like him.

Despite the tears, for the first time in a long time, Scott feels like his world is full of opportunity.

-

Scott’s just turned twenty, and he’s an architecture major. He’s not sure what he’s going to do with it, but he remembers the book of unusual building designs from the Milford public library, and he remembers the moment of awe he’d had staring up at the skyscrapers and how he’d almost put off his plans just to look at the buildings.

It’s a lot more math classes than he cares for, but the design classes are right up his alley and he goes home one weekend after a big design project exhausted but pleased. Aeor hugs him and offers to celebrate, and the powers that Scott’s been working on taming with Aeor prove useful, for once, as he drops ice cubes in both of their drinks.

Scott’s also just having a good time at school. At his therapist’s recommendation, he attends an ex-cult activity group (he’d been surprised one even existed, but the school’s big enough for a jousting club so why not). It helps immensely—he still has problems accepting that he was raised in a cult, but finding others with similar (and in one case, the exact same) experiences is so comforting. They develop into one of his main friend groups, all there to push each other when the world feels forbidden.

He also bonds with his roommate Jack (who is always up at insane hours of the morning doing computer science stuff), and Scott often finds himself hanging out in Jack’s circle. The tech majors are loud and nerdy, but sometimes that’s just what Scott needs, and he genuinely enjoys it.

He works in the theatre department, as the assistant student set designer. It’s good, hard work, and the woodworking professor doesn’t mind that sometimes when Scott’s excited or anxious or hits his thumb with a hammer ice explodes out of him. She never asks questions, just takes it in stride and sits him down and gets him a cup of coffee.

Most important to him, though, is his boyfriend.

Being queer was as taboo as being powered back home, and maybe it’s the liberalism of college or just the newfound freedom, but Scott buys four different pride flags within his first semester, cycling through bi and ace and pan only to settle, eventually, on gay. As soon as he decides that, he asks out Marcus from his ex-cult group of friends and the rest is history.

Marcus is funny and fiery and jaw-droppingly hot, and within a week of their first kiss Jack is voluntarily leaving the two of them alone in the room with a call of “Use protection!” thrown over his shoulder, as Scott laughs and locks the door and dims the lights.

It’s so freeing to have this control over himself and his body, and there are days when he thinks about calling his therapist and lowering his Paxil dose because for the first time since before that first day in the library purchasing a HiSET ticket, Scott feels overwhelmingly happy.

He never does—Aeor had advised him a year ago to track his moods daily and find the weekly average, and there’s still too many panic attacks and days of just going through the motions, brain fogged, that he can’t justify reducing his antidepressants. He doesn’t want to be suicidal again—he’s far too busy.

But otherwise, college is just as good for him as his therapist thought it would be. He’s passionate about his work, has made more friends than he could ever imagine having, and is dating a man he loves.

Everything is as perfect as it can be.

Until it isn’t.

Marcus has been working on a project for a while now. He's majoring in chemistry, so Scott spends a lot of late evenings reading chem books in the mini library outside the lab, waiting on his boyfriend to be done doing whatever. Marcus is a senior and a TA, which grants him special access to the labs. Scott doesn’t initially question the amount of time he spends there, nor the strange hours. He does begin to question, however, the failing grades that Marcus begins to receive, the anger (that’s always been there, that Scott loves because it makes him so passionate) that’s closer to the surface—and the thing that really tips him over the edge is when, while waiting outside Marcus’s dorm building one night for a date they’d planned, he sees a dark shape fly overhead and circle down onto the roof. When Marcus lets him in, his hair is windswept and the small of his back is sweaty.

After that Scott pays closer attention. He finds a red mask in Marcus’s closet on top of a shoebox, a shoebox that has a green supersuit folded neatly within it. He finds strange lists of locations in Marcus’s notebook, most of which (when he looks them up) appear to be government buildings. He watches through the glass windows at the lab, checks again and again against the books he’s become quite familiar with and comes to the inevitable conclusion that Marcus is building chemical bombs.

He’s not sure what to do at first. He spends a day or two trying to act like everything is normal, but he can’t help but think of what Marcus is doing behind the scenes and that tends to kill the mood a little bit when they make out.

Then he comes to an interesting thought: what if he just . . . goes with it? 

He doesn’t really advertise that he’s powered, and Marcus has merely observed that Scott's hands are always cold and hasn’t noticed anything else. If Marcus is shaping up to be a supervillain (and it’s becoming clearer every day), maybe it’s time to reveal to him his own super-tendencies. Scott thinks maybe he wouldn’t mind being the boyfriend (or even accomplice) of a supervillain. It’s a heck of a way to rebel, what with Aeor being the primary protector of the city and practically his guardian. With Marcus’s flight powers and his ice powers, they might be unstoppable. 

He’s very passionate with Marcus after that conclusion, because evil mastermind looks good on Marcus and it’s so very hot that Scott just can’t resist him. It’s taboo, it’s thrilling, and he can’t get enough of it.

Then Marcus comes home with blood on his shoes, the night that Scott had been planning on telling him that he knows everything and is with him to the end. And Scott doesn’t know whose it is, but making out on Marcus’s bed that night turns into more and when they lie in bed after, Marcus snoring lightly with his arm over Scott’s chest, Scott stares at the shoes and wonders who it belongs to. He doesn’t tell Marcus anything.

Then the next day on the news, there's a report of a woman who was murdered by her boyfriend and Scott’s suddenly so very scared because his boyfriend is capable of murder and has plans to commit mass murder and likely has murdered already.

He doesn’t want to tell Aeor. He’s embarrassed—both of the fact that he’s dating a man (he’s pretty sure Aeor’s not homophobic, but he hasn’t asked) and of the fact that he’d been willing to be a supervillain if it meant he could stay with his college boyfriend.

He can take care of this himself.

Scott sneaks into the theatre costume shop after hours—he’s got a key to the building, so it’s not really against the rules or anything, but it’s probably something he shouldn’t do so he makes sure to avoid both security cameras. From there he gets a black leotard along with a blue hooded cloak and a similarly medieval-looking silver top (he thinks it’s left over from last year’s production of Something Rotten). These he takes back to his dorm, where he already has black leggings, a dark blue mask that will cover most of his face, and a beanie to cover his hair.

Then he waits. He tracks Marcus's progress, keeps an eye on the news, practices his ice powers in secret whenever possible. Jack doesn’t ask questions when Scott asks if he knows what radio station is the police airwave, which, after a quick google search, Jack shoots the link to him in an email. There he hears definite mentions of Marcus, who has apparently named himself Kelvin (which is just about the lamest villain name Scott has ever heard. You have your pick of anything to strike fear into the hearts of your enemy, and you pick Kelvin? Science majors) and has three confirmed kills, two of them politicians and one an unconnected bystander.

Scott’s not picked up nothing working in the theatre, and he thinks he deserves an Oscar for his performance as the role of Marcus’s boyfriend, because to all outsiders apart from Jack, nothing has changed about their relationship. His friends still roll their eyes and pretend to vomit when Scott cuddles into Marcus during study sessions, he still gets catcalled by the guys when he impulsively leans up to kiss his partner, still gets the girls cooing at him about how cute they are when Scott gushes about his partner.

Nobody knows that he’s building a secret superhero identity.

He decides to call himself Major, for several reasons. For one thing, Major had been the last name alias he’d put on his Milford library card (at the time meaning Major Sin, a phrase popular in his church). The hospital Aeor had taken him to when he’d found him unconscious that fateful night had been Major Upper Empires Medical Center. But mostly, he becomes Major because it’s the name scribbled on a piece of peeling painter’s tape stuck on the tag of the cloak.

He’s almost too late to stop Marcus the first time. He manages to catch wind of a possible Kelvin situation at a political office building over the police airwaves, and he skips out on class to run to his dorm and shrug on the costume he’s built. Then he texts Jack that he’s taking Jack’s car and takes off, off toward the sound of sirens and in the direction of news trucks.

Sure enough, Marcus is there. Scott hops out of the car two streets down and books it for the incident, feeling his face heat as various members of the crowd gasp and point at him.

The fight is long, longer than he’d hoped it would be. Marcus is good at flying, has clearly had practice at dodging, and none of the ice spikes he throws hit their mark. Scott’s not got experience, not really, and he’s starting to wear out quickly and Marcus is laughing at him but with that irritated tone that tells Scott he’s having a bad day and even though he’s fairly sure he’s fallen out of love with him, he just wants to comfort him and pepper kisses all over his face until they’re both giggling.

He’s emotionally compromised, but he’s the only person who knows Marcus’s weaknesses. One can imagine the problems that creates.

The fight ends in a standstill, Kelvin knocking Scott to the ground before flying off and Scott slipping into the shadows before he has to answer any questions about his identity. That night he winces when Marcus’s fingers accidentally press against a bruise he’d unknowingly caused.

Two days later they have another fight that ends the same way, and news stations have begun to refer to him as the Mute Marauder and he just won’t stand for that, so he creates a Facebook page for himself under the name Major and reaches out to several news outlets anonymously to let them know his name and mission—to defend Empires City from the threat of Kelvin.

The next day is another fight and another standstill, and Scott’s watching the news footage over Jack's shoulder with an ice pack pressed to his lip when Jack turns around, meets his eyes with a serious gaze.

“Dude, you don’t have to tell me anything,” he says, “but you need to stop pulling your punches. It’s pathetic. Put that guy in prison or the hospital, whichever comes first.”

And. Well. What else can Scott do after that?

Their fight on Thursday of the next week is their last one.

Scott, as Jack recommended, does not pull any punches. He’s not sure how he manages it, but he shoots ice from in front and below Kelvin at the same time, crystallizing the ice around his leg in the spike coming up from below when he dodges the one in front of him. From there, Scott pulls him down to the ground, strides toward him with ice gathering in his fist, pulls him up by the collar (he thinks of all the times he’s kissed those lips, all the times he’s unbuttoned his shirt, all the times he’s laughed at the gleam in those eyes), and smashes his fist into Marcus’s jaw.

Kelvin’s eyes roll up into his head as he slumps, the only thing holding him up the encroaching ice on his back. Scott shakes out his wrist and shakes off the ice, watching it fall in crystals on the ground.

The cops load up the unconscious Marcus and promise that they won’t treat him badly when Scott asks. Then he’s crowded by press members and he’s forced to answer a few questions—mainly his name, how he knew Kelvin, and what he’s going to do next.

“You can call me Major,” he says, more than a little unsure of himself. “I knew Kelvin years ago and heard about him on the news. I don’t know if I’ll continue fighting crime, I’m a busy man. I won’t be taking more questions.”

Then he goes home, curls up in bed and cries his heart out.

Jack comes in at some point when he’s still huddled under the blankets, stands awkwardly in the middle of the room for a moment.

“They announced his identity,” Jack says, quietly, as if he’s not sure if Scott’s awake or not. “So. I’m sorry, bro. There’ll be a lot of people asking if you knew or whatever. So if you wanted to hang out here for the rest of today and tomorrow, I can bring you food.”

Scott sighs, pulls the blanket down. He knows he must look pretty bad from Jack’s wince. “Thanks. I think I need a day off, honestly. Might ask my da—er, my guardian to come pick me up and just come back next week. Take a long weekend.”

Jack nods a bit too vigorously. “Sounds like a plan. I get the room to myself for the next three days, you get some time away from all this. Sounds great. Especially the having-the-room-to-myself part.”

“Jack.”

“Hm?”

“Don’t touch my side of the room.”

-

Scott’s twenty-one, and he’s somehow become a superhero.

He didn’t ask for this. He really just wanted to keep up with his education, hone his powers so that they don’t burst out of him randomly, maybe settle down with someone and have a kid.

Now, however, he’s attending class during the day and patrolling the city in the evenings with Aeor—as long as he doesn’t have homework. When he’s got to study, he turns on the police radio airwave in the background and responds when there’s an emergency.

His costume’s his own now, rather than made up of pieces stolen from the theatre. His hooded cloak is midnight blue, his bodysuit a lighter shade, a golden ‘M’ embossed on the chest in curling script. His mask is gold as well, as are his tennis shoes.

Aeor had been more than willing to train him in fighting crime, rather than just teach him to control his powers. Now he’s learning how to use his ice in combat, how to channel that energy into a fighting force rather than his usual passive outbursts. He also learns some fun tricks—he can shoot ice from his toes, if he really tries. He can also breathe out ice shards (or more commonly, breathe freezing fog). He wants to get to a place where he can ice skate or slide down a sidewalk by projecting ice ahead of himself while destroying what he leaves behind. It sounds fun, but every time he tries he’s knocked onto his butt.

It still gets out of control sometimes—one morning he wakes up with his eyes iced over and he panics for a solid three minutes trying to open his eyes while Jack laughs at him.

“Oh, sure, because you’re completely immune to ice,” Scott shoots at him when he can finally see, ice forming around his hand in an impressive imitation of brass knuckles. He raises his hand threateningly. “You want a taste of it yourself?”

Jack’s still laughing when he apologizes, but Scott starts laughing too and it’s all okay.

Scott isn’t quite able to justify his degree, anymore. He’s in his second-to-last semester (the architecture program usually takes a little longer than he’s done it in, what with the summer classes he took to keep himself occupied) and he doesn’t even pretend that he’s going to be an architect. The public already loves him, is already accustomed to seeing him traveling around the city with Aeor the Protector. Scott’s going to be a superhero.

-

Scott’s twenty-two and he’s graduating.

For a brief moment, he considers mailing his graduation announcement to his parents. He talks about it with his therapist, and together they deem it to not be a good idea. For one thing, he’s not sure of his own motivation. Is he sending it to brag that he’s fine without them? Is he sending it as one final attempt at validation? Whatever his intentions, sending a letter will do nothing. They’ll likely just throw it away.

His therapist recommends that, if he genuinely feels he needs closure and he thinks it would be safe, he can go visit them in person. Scott doesn’t like that idea, not yet. It’s still too early.

He doesn’t need them, anyway. He’s got Aeor. Aeor, who taught him to drive and helped him apply for college. Aeor, who helped him learn how to control his ice powers and use them healthily instead of repressing them. Aeor, who picks him up from school on bad weekends and refills his antidepressants prescription and buys Scott’s favorite candy on occasion and teared up when Scott tried on his cap and gown and saved him.

Aeor’s the only parent that Scott needs.

And when Scott walks across the stage to receive his diploma, his freshly-cut red hair tucked neatly beneath his graduation cap, Aeor whoops and takes a picture and Scott can’t help the tears that build in his eyes.

He’d never thought he would make it here. He’s twenty-two, and he’s got friends and family and a degree and a job, and he’s happier than he’s ever been. Jack flips him off from the crowd. Scott laughs right as his picture is taken.

Three weeks later, that photo is taped on the fridge in Scott’s new townhouse, right next to his antidepressants prescription and a newspaper clipping featuring a photo of Scott and Aeor in costume beside each other, the headline reading ‘AEOR ENDORSES POSSIBLE NEW PROTECTOR, MAJOR.’

Aeor hugs him hard when they move the last of Scott’s boxes into the house and whispers in his ear, “I’m so very proud of you.”

Everything is looking up for Scott.

[katandabbieslife]

Saturday, December 15th, 2018. End of Semester/Holiday Party for friends!

On Saturday, the 15th, we had a party to celebrate the end of the semester, the beginning of a month long winter break, and the holiday with a small group of our best friends. We woke up about 8am, jumped in the shower and washed each other, had a small make-out session, some light fingering and playing with the water dong shower attachment. We talked about the party and everything we had to do to get ready. We’re college girls, we’re not the best housekeepers. We walk in the house at night, we drop keys, books, kick off our shoes, and start shedding clothing. The bra is always first. Depending on the temperature, pants are next. It’s not uncommon to have to go to the chair in the living room to get a bra in the morning. We are messy! That’s all there is to it. We try to do better, but with school and homework, housekeeping gets in the way sometimes.

We enjoyed our shower, and each other with some kissing, and within a minute, I was on my knees and Kat’s legs was over my shoulder while I had her backed against the shower wall and my face between her legs. I ran my tongue up and down her gorgeous, and slippery little slit. Running my tongue back to her asshole, teasing it lightly with my tongue before running my hand up the back of her leg and pressing against her opening before she pushed back and relaxed her tight little butthole to accept my middle finger and slipping it inside just as I sucked her clit between my lips and began flicking my tongue back and forth over it. Her hand was on the back of my head and began grinding into my mouth as she pulled me in harder. After a few minutes of licking and sucking her clit and on her soft inner lips, my tongue began to tire. I began kissing my way up her belly, up to her tits, and to her neck. She let her back slide down the shower wall until she sat on the bench. I leaned down, kissing her, sucking on her tongue, as I slid my hand down and massaged her clit to bring her to a leg shaking orgasm. As I settled down on her thigh, still kissing, and making out with her, I began grinding my wet little mound against her leg, with one hand twisting and pinching her nipples. My hands made their way up to cup her face as I kissed her with all the passion I had in me while feeling her arms around me and her hand as she brought it front and center to give me something else to rub against. Rocking my hips and grinding against her had me shaking on her lap within a minute and half. I slumped my head over her shoulder, against the wall for a moment before grabbing the shampoo and plopping a bit in my hand and massaging it into her hair as I sat, still slowly grinding on her thigh. We both finished washing up, drying off and getting ready to face the day and get ready for our holiday/end of semester party.

We had laundry to do since we had to pack the next day for a month away on winter break. We also had to vacuum, dust, and run the dishwasher. We finished in the shower and jumped out to dry off. I dried myself and wrapped the towel around my head, brushed my teeth and left the bathroom to find Kat already plugging the vacuum cleaner in and getting ready to clean. She just looked at me and said “Nuh Uh! You have got to put something on or we’ll never get the house ready!” Still standing there with only my towel around my head and nothing else, her in panties and a Tee shirt, I casually walked over, slid my hands up her thighs, under her shirt and up her sides, then in a quick smooth motion, slipped her shirt off and up over her head, put it on and just bounced away, giggling like a mischievous little pixie. She gave me a smirky little grin, as if to say “You sneaky little bitch!” I sorted and started the laundry and after the first load was in, I loaded the dishwasher. While Kat was still cleaning in the living room, I started making our shopping list for the day and luckily, only had to get food. Mainly just snack foods, like a cheese and cracker tray. We had a request for Totino’s Pizza rolls and ranch dressing. We also got like 5 foot long subs from Subway to cut in short lengths. The Alcohol was handled Wednesday night by way of mass text! Not sure what to get, I sent out a group text to everyone coming and took requests. I had to get Absolut, Captain Morgans Spiced Rum, A bottle of Patron, and possibly the most expensive bottle of Vodka I have ever purchased in my life, but it was for Kat and I. I ordered a Bottle of Fallen Angel vodka for Kat and I a few weeks ago at $185 for a little over a pint, but it came in a really cool devils head bottle, two shot glasses with the logo and a pourer. We each had one shot and put it on our shelf.  

It was 11:00am and we’d finished most of the cleaning and put another load of laundry in the washing machine, got ready, then ran out to do some shopping. We had 9 hours so we finished up some Christmas shopping, stopped by the UPS store, to send the gifts to her parents, We’d be there before they arrived on Tuesday or Wednesday anyway, and it’s cheaper than stuffing it all into another suitcase and paying baggage fee’s. We grabbed lunch, stopped by Forever 21 to just look around for a bit and ended up in the fitting room for a little make-out session. I may or may not have fondled Kat while she was trying on a dress, but I could not resist! Her gorgeous little ass was in my face as she bent over to pull the dress up and I had to bite it! We finished shopping and headed home, stopping on the way to place the order at Subway to pick up later.

I spent the day, off and on, talking to friends online. Some heading home for winter break or those who left Friday and were already home. We ran out around 6:30pm to grab the sandwiches and were home by 7:15 to cut them into short sections and put them on plates and get all the other food ready. We got dressed, both of us in leggings and I wore a loose top and a bralette underneath while Kat wore an off the shoulder top and a strapless bra. I chose to go commando in my leggings since they were laced up to the waist band on both sides and I never got my undies out of the dryer before I was getting dressed. I also don’t mind showing off my hips, or my body, in person, for that matter.

Our apartment isn’t huge and we only invited 8 of our friends who we consider our closest friends. Counting Kat and myself, there were 6 girls, 4 guys, or 4 couples, and 2 friends who are single (secretly hoping to get them together.) All of which have seen us or we’ve seen them in various states of undress. A couple of them, we have had full on sexual experiences with, Heather and Madi. Heather being one of the two singles we invited and Madi, one of the three other couples. We all knew how the night may go, and our biggest rule when we all party is the phones are left on the shelf by the door. We are there to have fun with friends at the party and not those who are not. We’re also not there to sit around and play on Twitter, Snap, Instagram, or whatever app we all get consumed by these days. One thing I usually try to do anyway is leave my phone in the hotel room, in my bag, or elsewhere when hanging out with friends.

Sometime between 7:30 and 8pm, Madi and her boyfriend had shown up and I walked over, stood on my tippy toes and gave Madi a smooch on the lips, turned and wrapped my arms around her boyfriend for a hug and squeezed his ass while I was at it. This elicited a laugh and a “hey hey hey” from Madi as she slapped my ass. Kat walked up and followed suit with a kiss for Madi and a hug for her man. The others showed up over the next 15 to 20 minutes. We had an EDM music channel on playing on the TV. As we all sat around and just talked about our plans for the holidays, we sipped on some drinks, had some snacks, and played some “Cards Against Humanity” for a bit.

We talked about the party last year, when I was running behind getting ready and was actually in the shower when everyone started arriving. Kat being the evil monkey she can be sometimes, snuck into the bathroom, grabbed my clothes and towel and left me in the shower with nothing to wear. I ended up walking through the apartment in front of everyone, naked as can be, only glaring at Kat as I walked through to our bedroom saying “You didn’t think I would do it, did you?” and her response was ” I was counting on it.” To which I replied “Of course it was” thinking back on all the naked pizza delivery and room service challenges she got me to do since we’ve been together.   This year, I was ready before anyone got there so I had no worries, at least not yet.

Just to give you an idea of our smaller, more private parties for our closest friends, here is a video of the type of party we enjoy. pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5aec6074b411f

We like to play party games, but always revert to middle and high school adolescent games like spin the bottle, truth or dare, suck and blow, or even 7 minutes in heaven. Most happen when we all get tipsy which was beginning as we started taking shots. A few shots later, “Truth or Dare” was brought up, and another incident from last years party was about to repeat itself. It started with most of us girls taking choosing truth and the guys choosing dares. We saw all four dicks within the first 10 minutes of playing. The truth questions started taking longer to come up with so when my turn rolled around, Kat asked and I chose Dare. My dare was a strip tease. (This is not me, but it gives you an idea of what I was doing.https://www.erome.com/a/ywfNUB8G ) I started gyrating my hips a little as I pulled my top off over my head, and I was told by one of the guys to “get your short little ass up on the coffee table so we can see you short stuff!” I stepped over to the table and one of the guys held my hand and elbow as I stepped up on the table they had cleared off. I continued by pulling off the bralette, and turning around to shake my 32C’s at everyone, sliding my hands down over my breasts and down my belly as I hooked my thumbs in my waistband, still gyrating and turning around as I wiggled them down over my ass and too my knees. My friend Alex stood up and held my hand as I stepped out of my leggings, and stood there, nude, except for my little pink ankle socks. Anxious to show off my pretty red pedi Kat and I got earlier in the day, I stepped on the toe of my socks and pulled my feet free from each. I continued dancing for another 20 or 30 seconds while the song on the music channel played, bending over with my ass facing everyone to give everyone a peek. I lowered myself by bending at the knees, sliding my hands down my legs, then as I stood, let my hands slide upward again and between my legs to brush my slit, which I could tell was getting wet just from all the attention I was getting. The girls were clapping, the guys were cheering, and I was off the hook for a few minutes as I looked at Madi and said “Truth or Dare?” Madi picked dare and not wanting to be the only naked girl there, I told her to take her shirt off. She blushed and turned red, turned her head for a minute and looked at her boyfriend and he shook his head yes.

Madi stood up and pulled her shirt up and over her head. She got ready to sit back down and I told her the Bra had to come off too and I got an “Aww Damn it!” and her boyfriend laughed. The others started picking dare and within a few turns, I was feeling more comfortable about being naked, especially since I was getting very tipsy and I wasn’t the only naked one there. I was feeling a bit chilled so I went to turn up the heat a little and set the thermostat to like 80 degrees. I figured the high heat would also help the others shed some clothes too. The guys were now beginning to shed clothes with one guy being totally nude and the others shirtless. One girl was dared to blow her boyfriend in front of us, which she happily did. I was dared to give one friend a handjob by his very own girlfriend. Her reasoning was “I know you don’t get to play with much dick and this is my Christmas present to you!” So I enjoyed it. I leaned down, worked up some saliva and let it fall to the head of his cock as I brought my thumb and fingers up over the tip to lubricate it a little. After a few seconds, he started thrusting in my hands as I was had both hands wrapped around his shaft, sliding back and forth. After a minute or so he started saying he was about to cum and I told his girlfriend to get over here as he began to cum, one small drop hitting my tit and the rest on her chest and belly as she settled in front of him and took him in her mouth as she cleaned him up. I got up, and saw Kat still in her long, baggy, off the shoulder shirt and said “Truth or Dare?” She chose dare and of course, her dare was to finish getting naked since like 6 or 7 of us already were totally nude or sitting around with clothes in our laps.

Kat smiled, raised her top over her head and then standing there, facing everyone, told me to unhook her bra. Kat has an amazing pair of 30B’s that are perfectly shaped for their size and she loves showing them off. I love seeing the look on her face when she does too. I’ve seen her many times yank her shirt up at the bar to flash people and she gets that cute little embarrassed grin. She enjoys being naked as much as I do.

 We were all very tipsy by now and one of the girls asked if there were any limits to the game. I said I was game for anything and everyone looked at each other and said they were up for it and I said if anyone was uncomfortable with any dare, to just let the group know and we’d just pick another dare. Heather was dared to blow the single guy in the group to finish. Within 2 minute he came down her throat and Madi stepped over to lock lips with her. One girl, Karen, was dared to taste me, which I promptly sat on the coffee table and spread my legs. As she ran her tongue up and down my slit, I put my hand on the back of her head and pulled her closer, while she sucked my pussy lips into her mouth with a little tug. She looked up from between my legs at Kat and asked “Truth or dare?” Kat chose Dare, and Karen looked at Kat, then at me, and said “I dare you to help blow my boyfriend!��� I smiled and shook my head as Kat said “Ok!” then she walked over to kiss Karen, then looked at me and said “That tastes familiar!” after a few minute of sliding his cock between their lips and them making out with each other, Kat impaled her face on his stiff cock and took him to the base several times, to the cheers of the rest of the group. Karen placed her hand on the back of Kats heads and pushed her down a few times, then told her “I got this now.” Kat kissed her once more and then Karen sucked her boyfriend’s cock down her throat. Kat looked at me and said “Truth or Dare?” Since I was enjoying the way direction the party was going, I chose Dare. I was still laying on my back, on the coffee table, and up for anything. Kat looked at me with her evil grin and said “Masturbation show!” and my hand immediately shot down to my wet little cunt. As I began, I asked one of the girls “Truth or Dare?” she chose dare and I told her I wanted to see her with a cock in her mouth. Her Boyfriend smiled and stood up as she turned and let him slide inside. I turned my attentions back to myself. One hand slid up my belly and over my tit, grabbing my nipple and tugging it toward my mouth, then letting go and cupping my boob to force my nipple up to lick and suck on and I crammed two fingers deep inside my pussy, going for my G-Spot. I pulled my feet up on the edge and bucked my hips and ass up from the table. Madi walked over, leaned down and sucked my other nipple into her mouth, and with a small friendly bite and sucked as she pulled back and let it pop from her mouth, driving me crazy. Arching my back from the table with my cunt up in the air, the guys were watching and cheering, the girls were rubbing my legs and stomach while Kat had my ass in her hand. Within minutes, I was about to make myself cum as my feet slid off the edge of the table and my ass slapped back down and my legs went into convulsions. As I was laying there recovering, one girl chose Dare and was told to taste me, and she asked if she could take her turn real quick and then do it, everyone said yes and she looked at me while asking her boyfriend to put his cock inside me. I smiled and put my feet back on the edge of the table, and lifted my butt off the table to move around to face him as he leaned forward, his girlfriend put her hand on his ass and pushed him inside me several times, then pulled him out and leaned around and shoved his cock, coated with my juices, down her throat. She smiled and said that I tasted good, then leaned in for a few licks of her own and I was on the edge again.

There were a few more blowjobs given, and then the single guy was dared to fuck me and eat Kat at the same time so I got up from my comfy coffee table to let him lay back. I stepped back up on the table and straddled him as I lowered myself down onto his cock in the cowgirl position. A few seconds later, Kat stepped up on the table and lowered her pussy down to his mouth as her inner lips hung down just a little lower, she wiggled her ass from side to side, rubbing them across his lips before completely giving him access. I leaned forward and cupped Kats face as I bounced up and down on him, slipping my tongue past her lips, then sucking hers into my mouth. My hand made it up to her tits as I tweaked her nipples, and rolled them between my thumb and index finger, kissing her neck as she moaned from the attentions being given to her tight little pussy. Within 2 minutes, he tapped my thigh and I could hear a muffled “I’m gonna cum!” from under Kats wet little cunt, prompting me to raise up from him and stoke him off to finish on Kats belly and chest. Kat wiped her finger through a spot on her breasts and popped it in her mouth and sucked the cum from her finger just as Heather stepped over and ran her tongue up Kats belly, slurping up most of his cum. She couldn’t reach what has run down towards Kats pussy and as Kat raised up, Heather finished cleanup on Kat, wrapping her mouth over Kat’s mound and sliding her tongue upwards from Kats slit to her belly button. My hand was on Heathers ass, squeezing and kneading it, and just about to slide my fingers inside her as she stood up with a smile, turned to me and kissed me deeply, not since my birthday party had Heather kissed me that forcefully.

My turn came around again and I was less tipsy so I chose truth. Karen asked “What is the sexiest thing you own? I bounced through the living room, into our bedroom and grabbed one of my Foxtails and popped the plug in my mouth to cover it with saliva and slid it into my pink little asshole. I walked back out into the living room with my hands behind my back. Using my hands, I swished it from side to side. One of the guys made a comment about it not being that sexy. I squinted my eyes at him, closed my lips tight, put my hands on my hips and turned around and bent over to show them it was actually a plug. A couple of them mentioned how hot they thought tail plugs are, a couple others were transfixed on my ass and the tail protruding from it, while Kat mentioned that was only part of a set she got me for my Birthday last year. I said I love Pet Play. One guy asked if it was the same as “Furries” and I explained Furries and Pet Play are totally different. “Furries” generally enjoy being in full costume, a lot like a full mascot costume, while Pet play involves ears, tails, sometimes “hooves”, collars and leashes.

The game was winding down and the couples were cuddling, having sex, oral or traditional, and I realized yet another party turned into kind of an orgy. Madi walked over and asked if we had any weed and Kat told her yes, they went into the bedroom where our bowl and stash was, everyone else was making out or otherwise engaged as Madison’s boyfriend walked over and asked if he could go in and I laughed and said “Of course. I’ll be in, in a minute.” I stood up and since I could feel my buzz leaving me, I grabbed the Absolut and took a couple big hits from the bottle and told everyone we’d be back in a few minutes and almost no one noticed. I stepped into the bedroom and Madi was lighting the pipe as she inhaled and Kat was laying on her back with Madi’s boyfriend had his fingers teasing Kat’s pussy and Kats rubbing her hands up and down his thighs. I walked over to Madi and put my arms around her belly and leaned my head against her arm. Kat had moved her hand to stroke his cock as I watched him tease her for a minute and then I leaned over to whisper in his ear “I want to see your cock in her.” He glanced over at Madi as she held the pipe up to my lips and lit it as I inhaled. She just said “Please baby, fuck her!” I reached over and grabbed his dick, gave it a few strokes, and guided him in as she hooked her feet around him and pulled him into her deep. I crawled up on the bed, beside Kat and started sucking her nipples and felt someone playing with my ass and pussy, assuming it was him, I wiggled my ass from side to side, then felt someone push me over on my side. I looked down to see Madison burying her face in my wet little cunt and sucking my lips inside and teasing my clit with her tongue. I looked to my right and saw pure Ecstasy on Kats face, staring at me and she mumbled “I love you so much baby girl.” We were in the moment, enjoying being pleasured my Madi and her boyfriend. I could feel Kat using her legs wrapped around him, pulling him into her with force and her grunting as he slammed into her. I looked down at Madi and her boyfriend had his right hand behind her, and from the way Madi was moving her hips, he had his fingers deep inside. I was ready to cum again and as my legs started to tense up, I could feel Madi’s breath quicken as she raised up to say she was about to cum and just hearing that pushed me over the edge. He started fucking Kat faster and I could tell Kat was cumming and then he pulled out and Madi turned to slide her mouth down over his cock and take every drop down her throat. Just then I heard someone say “That was so fucking hot!” and I looked over to see Heather and one of the other girls and her boyfriend standing there. His arms around his girlfriend with his hands rubbing her pussy as they watched the four of us fuck.

We all composed ourselves, got up to rejoin everyone in the living room only to notice one of the other couples gone. I had the munchies and stepped into the kitchen to grab a pizza roll to find the missing couple, she on the counter and him, knee’s on the floor with his face buried in her cunt, with her legs up and over his shoulders. We stepped back into the living room and the single guy we’d invited for Heather was sleeping in the recliner, naked. Heather thought she might blow him and to wake him, after 30 seconds, with no response at all from him, she withdrew his flaccid cock from her mouth and said “I give up.” with a laugh. Kat told her “It’s ok if you want to stay the night, we have something for you.” and I gave Heather a smile and shook my head yes. She smiled and grabbed her boots, pants and purse to put them in our room.

The others came in from the kitchen and smiled as they apologized for taking the kitchen for themselves and said that the other couple was on the bathroom having sex when they went to the kitchen.

As things were winding down, I turned the heat back down because people were putting clothes back on and getting ready to head home. Uber’s were ordered, cabs were called, and Single guy still out cold in the recliner. Madi and her boyfriend left, the same time Karen and her man left, the other couple left about 10 minutes later and I was wearing a long tee shirt with nothing else as I stepped out in bare feet to walk the out to the cab, as I turned around and she was talking to me and telling me to be careful, I said loudly “Hey Driver! Happy Holidays!” and flipped my shirt up in the back to show my bare ass, and bounced back up the sidewalk to the apartment. Back in the house, Kat and Heather had a sharpie, drawing faces on single guys dick. I laughed and asked if they thought it might be toxic. They asked why and I told them, if he wakes up while we’re playing, we might want him to join us, at which point Kat grabbed the sharpie from Heather and capped it real quick, saying  “Good Point!” he didn’t wake though. We threw a blanket over him and the three of us retired to our room, leaving the door open in case he woke. The three of us enjoyed each other before falling asleep, only to be woken up around 8:30am by a knock, with single guy telling us he was going to head home and thanking us for the party and telling Heather he’d call her. I jumped up, grabbed my robe and threw it on without tying it and letting him out the door and locking it behind him. I went back to bed and squeezed in between Kat and Heather to doze back off for a little longer. After we woke up, there was some slight regret from the night before in the form of headaches, and all around queasiness, asking each other and texting the others “Did I really do that?” along with apologies and other saying “Please don’t apologize, we loved it!” or something to that effect. Heather went home, and Kat and I spent the day packing for our 3 week long trip to our parent’s places for some time back home with Rick and Family. Unfortunately, Ricks bitch of a girlfriend was going to be there too. Later in the afternoon, Madi stopped by for instructions on House sitting for us since she and her family live in town and she’d be available to stop by to check on things and bring mail in every day or two.

Also, please know that I am aware I may not be the best, or most moral person for sleeping with another girls boyfriend. I have my reasons for it to not bother me. Not that you will agree, but his girlfriend is a gold-digger and just an evil bitch, for the most part, which you might begin to understand when I get around to posting about our time at the farm with her. She told Rick, last year “You better not be sniffing around your lesbian sisters little “dyke” girlfriend!” He also said she had wished various things on me, some involving violence that I will not go into here. Suffice it to say, I feel no guilt fucking her boyfriend at all. The way Rick looks at it, he’s just doing me a service and giving me real dick, while I’m doing him a service and getting him off while he gets to see his little sister and myself, naked.

More will be posted soon from our trip back home for the holidays.

-Abbie

[seraphineroze13]

My Semi-Charmed Mental Breakdowns

Mental illness refers to a wide range of mental health conditions — disorders that affect your mood, thinking and behavior. Facing off with these disorders is a challenge especially when you don’t know what you’re doing. I use to think I had to defeat my mental illness on my own in one day. Throughout my life I have realized it’s an ongoing battle. You don’t just get to wake up one day and be like yay I’m happy and never going to feel that way again. Writing about these experiences has opened up my eyes to the fact that it’s a lifelong fight to deal with your mental illness. Sometimes you can’t defeat it, you just have to learn to live with it.

They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. Over and over in my head I repeat those three words. If I say it in my head maybe I can wish it out into the universe. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. I said these last couple out loud because maybe that would strengthen the meaning behind it. Maybe it would make it more believable for me. Unfortunately there is still that nagging voice in the back of my head. They do not care. They do not miss you. You are forgotten. You are nothing! It screams over everything in my head telling me not to listen to the voice. All of the good memories, all of the phone calls, the texts, all of the kind words falling onto now deaf ears since all I can hear are the words being shouted at me from inside my head. You do not matter. You never mattered. You will never matter. It adds a dark film over all of the memories I use to look at with such happiness and shows me every mistake I made up until this point in my existence. It taunts me every day of my life. It has popped up in different forms throughout my entire life but it does have one quite general name: mental illness.

Depression; it is the first and most consistent form of mental illness that has impacted my life. It did not start with me. I watched my mom struggle with depression for years before I even knew what it was. When I was around the age of 4 or 5 I remember thinking my mom was a Disney princess because of how well put together and happy she seemed. She always had her make-up done perfectly, and when she was with my dad, they lit up the room.

. When I was about 9 everything changed. She stopped putting on her make up every day and caring how she looked. I could hear her arguing with my dad when she thought my sister and I had fallen asleep.  The most vivid memory that sticks out in my mind though was from when I was 11 years old. I came home to find my mom in bed. It was odd because it was 4pm and my mom did not get home until usually 7 or 8pm. When I walked into the bedroom to make sure she was okay my stomach dropped. Her eyes seemed so far off, kind of glassy and dead, and she had tears streaking down her face. The sight of her scared me but I figured maybe today was just a bad day. She had a couple of bad days here and there throughout the years so maybe today was just a really bad one. It turned out I was wrong because that bad day had turned into two bad weeks. She stayed in bed for two weeks, calling off work, barely wanting to leave her room. I could hear her in the room crying with the door closed but when I would knock and see if she needed anything she would yell out “I’m fine!” and “Mami will be all right sweetie”. Her hiding away in her room, denying her emotions, ignoring the breakdown is something I know she was taught. Always put on a brave face. Don’t let anyone see you break down; they will perceive you as weak. It is a lesson that my mother unknowingly passed down to my sister and me.

I noticed around 13 that I did not feel as much like myself as usual. The things I loved became boring and tedious. Learning new things in school became such an unsatisfying task that I had to be bribed into learning the coursework so I could pass. I was just barely getting by and I did not understand why everything changed. That is also around the time the voice started. Where no matter what I did right it found something wrong. Where a good time happened it would point out the bad. I started to put myself down and find the bad in any situation so I could have a reason for being so sad, so unlike myself. I waited for someone else to notice that something was wrong, because obviously if no one else sees anything wrong maybe I am just being melodramatic. How could I feel so out of place without anyone noticing a difference in me? Well I got my wish of someone noticing the minute I came home and told my parents that I never wanted to sing again. Singing was a passion of mine and I had done everything in my power to improve my voice up until that point. I had been in choirs, sang almost every song in the car, and even took voice lessons. The day I came home and told them I wanted to quit singing was the day I broke my parents’ heart and made them see just how different I had become. I broke down crying in the middle of the doorway, telling them there was no purpose to singing. “I’m not even good enough to do anything with it,” I exclaimed. “Why waste the time and money on me?” I told them there was nothing special with the way I sang and then I just shut down. I sat on the ground, wrapped my arms around my legs, and just sat there waiting for them to say something. Nothing they said would make me feel better but I knew they were trying. I heard there words like they were far off in the distance. “You are an amazing singer”, and “You are so talented”, and “Everything is going to be fine”, were all sentences that I can remember but I did not believe a single one of them.

 Spiraling through the depressive states left me a little worse for wear but when the anxiety and panic attacks started it made everything ten times worse. I was in sixth grade when I had my first panic attack. I did not even realize it was a panic attack until years later when I thought about what had happened. I remember the day was a haze where all I could think about was getting home so I could curl up under my blanket and hide from the world. I ended up leaving school two hours early due to the fact that I was in the nurse’s office unable to breathe. My dad worked at the elementary school down the block so he picked me up and took me home. I could tell he was extremely worried by all the glances he kept casting my way on our walk to the house. When the door opened I immediately felt better. I walked to my room, changed into my favorite pajamas, and went to the living room to spend time with my dad. Being near him has always made me feel better and I hoped today would be no different. Before I made to the living room I heard him on the phone with my mom. I hid in the dining room trying to listen to what was happening.

“She told the nurse she was having a hard time breathing Raquel.” There was a pause which must have meant my mother was talking now. It was a long pause and when I took a peek around the corner my dad’s head was in his hands.

“No she’s fine now. We are going to hang out until you come home then we can talk more about it.” Another long pause and then a sigh. “I understand that but we can’t force her to talk to us. I don’t think she needs to go to the hospital but she does need to talk to someone. Honey we can talk more when you are home. Maybe I can try and figure out a bit more while we watch tv. I love you.” My dad set his phone down and I finally decided to come out from my hiding spot. I sniffled, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall down my face. I sit down next to him on the couch, wrap myself in the blanket, and lean my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me and starts to rub my back.

“Sweetie, are you really okay? This doesn’t seem like a breathing issue since you are breathing okay right now. Did you want to talk about something?” When I looked into my dad’s eyes I broke down. I held onto him and started to sob.

“I just haven’t felt good all day. I had to present to the class and I messed up. Then I almost started crying in front of everyone. After that my chest started to feel tight and like I wasn’t getting any air. I almost passed out in class so then I went to the nurse. I was so scared you were going to say I couldn’t come home because I know the rule is if you aren’t bleeding or dying you need to stay but I really felt like I couldn’t make it.” I rushed through the story like my life depended on it. I felt like I was being so melodramatic but it was the only way to get away from school. I needed to leave that place so badly. It was so hard to have to face all of the people I thought were friends. I thought they were my friends and I am sure they made fun of me; I am sure none of them cared I left. Why would they care? I am just a place holder friend. As these thoughts spiraled through my head I started to get that tight feeling in my chest.

All I wanted was to be left alone and some peace and quiet. I thought pushing everyone away would give me time to work on me and make me better. I tried therapy, meditation, medication, and everything in between. Nothing made that empty feeling inside me go away. Sometimes I was able to distract myself from it. When I was younger I would use basketball as my get away, then I started high school and theatre was my new big distraction. I was still feeling that nagging, empty feeling but I focused all of my energy on the distractions instead of what was wrong. Senior year of high school it spiraled out of control.

I was walking home from school late one night after theatre had ended and decided I would take the long way home. I only lived about two miles away and it was nice to have some time alone. I was fine for about 5 minutes before the weird thoughts started. I would glance out into the road and the first thought that popped up would say “Just take one step out and it’ll be over,” or “How fast do you think a car would have to be going to just hurt you?” After about 3 more instances of comments like that I decided to put on my headphones and blast my music. I hoped it would distract me from the horrible thoughts I was having.

“No one would visit you if you got hurt. Who would care about a girl like you? All you do is whine and complain and nothing bad has ever even happened to you. You are a spoiled brat.” The music wasn’t drowning out the thoughts it was just giving them a backbeat, making it easier to remember them. After 15 more minutes I was hyperventilating and needed to sit down to count. One tactic I had learned to shut up the voices in my head was to count up to 4, tapping each finger on my thumb. On a good day I just had to tap but I days like the one I was experiencing I was practically shouting the numbers while digging my nails into my thumb.

Why isn’t it working? Why can’t I make the voices stop?!

“It’s because you deserve every bad thing that has ever happened to you. You deserve to be tortured like this, to know that everyone hates you even though you try your hardest to fit in. You would never fit in because no one could ever accept a piece of trash person like you.” The voice kept getting louder and louder, more horrible things being hurled at me as tears fell down my face. “You are pathetic. You are a waste of space that doesn’t deserve to take up other peoples’ time. Obviously no one cares about you. You are sarcastic, loud, and force yourself into other peoples’ lives when they don’t need or want you. Why do you think everyone keeps leaving? Why do you think-?” The voice finally shut up. I didn’t understand why until I felt the pressure on my forearm. I glanced down and saw that I had begun to dig my nails into my skin. I removed them only to see little drops of blood traveling down my forearm. I decided then that hurting myself was the only way to get the voices to stopped.

It worked for a bit, that was until my best friend noticed. I started to wear long sleeves and pants all the time since I had started to lose room on my arms to mark up, my legs were the next area to be attacked. It was a week before graduation when my best friend, Crystal pulled me aside and mentioned the change in my wardrobe.

“Yazmin, you hate pants. I don’t think I have seen you wear a pair unless it’s below 30 degrees. Now you’re wearing long sleeves AND pants. What is going on?” She looked at me with concern in her eyes. I couldn’t tell her what I was doing but I also couldn’t look her in the eyes and straight up lie to her. I was fidgeting with the sleeves when she lightly punched my arm.

“Hey dork. What is it? Is everything okay? You’ve been kind of distant lately and it’s scaring me. We can’t go off to college with you being all in your head all the time.” I took a breath and told her what I had realized.

“It makes the voices stop,” I muttered under my breath, rolling up my sleeve, “and sometimes they don’t start at all because I can sense when it’s about to start so I do this first.” I started to show her how I would dig my nails into my skin when she grabbed my arm and stopped me.

“Yazmin, you do that one more time and I am going to beat your ass.” I looked up to see a glaring Crystal and pulled my arm back.

“I just wanted to stop being told I was a piece of trash. I feel so worthless sometimes and the voices hurt more than the actual pain in my arm so I figured I’d choose one evil over the other.” I shrugged my shoulders, sat down on the ground, and stared at my feet. She sat down next to me and hugged me super tight and didn’t let go until I pushed her off.

“We all love you stupid. That voice in your head is not something you should listen to. Listen to me. I am your best friend and I will always be here for you. I will make sure that I tell you as much as I can how much I appreciate you. You are one of the best things to happen to me Yazmin and I can’t imagine my world without you in it.”

It dawned on me then all of the things that people had been trying to tell me throughout the years. Things including how important I was, how special I was, how worthwhile I was, and most importantly how much I was loved. My depression and anxiety have not gone away and that little voice in my head is still saying those horrendous things to me but I have learned to live with them and hopefully someday soon I will learn how to defeat them for good

[norwegianfriedokra]

I’ve done it!

It's been a while since I've posted something substantial, but now that the residency permit has come through I've got some breathing room, 11 months in fact!! So, it might get lengthy, but here is everything that happened as I remembered and experienced it.

To get a residency permit you fill out your initial application. That part isn't too difficult, as long as you already have a job offer.  You must have a job offer before your application means anything. Then you wait for them to ask for follow up, because it seems there is always follow up to your initial application.  That tends to be corrections, additional information, or something similar, and there was definitely some additional information needed about my job.  

Next you'll get a letter in the mail, because everything is sent by mail by the Auslӓnderbehӧrde (Residency Office). This letter lets you know what you will need to bring to your appointment, and that you need to go to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to get a "Wartenummer" (waiting number) in order to get an appointment.  Here's where the real story begins.

After several cultural and translation miscommunications occurred, which for me is most likely way easier than most internationals seeking a residency permit, I show up at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to get this Wartenummer. I show up around 11am, wait in line for about 60 minutes (that's on average around that time of day). When I get to the service desk they tell me all the Wartenummer have already been given out for the day and that I will need to show up the next day to get one.  I ask how early I should show up the next day and they said people start to show up around 8am.  Keep in mind, the next day they actually open up at 1pm, so that means if I want a Wartenummer I have to show up around 8am and wait for 5 hours before I get a Wartenummer.  

Ok, no big deal, I pack some stuff to keep me busy and head down there the next morning.  I show up 15 minutes before 8am and there are already 16 people ahead of me in line. I think to myself at this point that I'm still pretty early. I wait around for a couple of hours, get really cold and whine at Jens to bring me coffee. When he shows up I don't think I had ever shivered in my life that much, and by that time everyone waiting in line had a general understanding that movement and standing in the sun from time to time to keep warm wasn't going to lose your spot. Thankfully so, I was having a hard time of it. Luckily around 11am they opened the doors and allowed people into the warming interior waiting space, even though they aren't actually open, and give people a small piece of paper with their spot in line.  This means you can now come and go until they officially open at 1pm.  So I have lunch with Jens and then go back inside.  When I finally get to the service counter again, pretty soon after 1pm because I was number 17, I find out all the Wartenummer are gone.  I'm confused because I assumed that the slip of paper was the Wartenummer I was waiting for.  I come to find out that no, actually, that was just the number in line, not the Wartenummer for appointments.  But at this point they go ahead and schedule an actual appointment for me on the 6th of May.  Which wasn't that far ahead and all, but still after my start date for work.  

So, at this point I have an appointment to get my residency permit, albeit after my start date at work.  So I bike off to work from the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to explain my situation...

Ah, I forgot to mention that biking to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde takes about 30 minutes, so every time I had to go there it was a bit of a bike ride. Not bad, it just took planning, right?  

Side note: I often would get a bit lost on my way there because I was always searching for a more direct route, as I kept missing a certain on ramp (somehow) that would take me over the main tracks from the Frankfurt Main train station.  You can see those tracks on the map above, they are quite substantial.  Often my bike tires would get low on air, like really low, so biking was super painful (eventually I got them aired up), also I loaded down the bike with a sleeping bag and other gear to make the waiting easier and the bike was just heavy to begin with.  

...but back to the main story.  I arrive at work and tell them my story. Me: "I have an appointment for my residency permit but it's not until after my start date" *sad face* (see other definition; dejected duck face). Work: "That's cool, but can you please try to get a cancelled appointment (that really means Wartenummer)? Otherwise we have to redo all your paperwork." *slightly annoyed face* (see other definition; it's always hard being an immigrant get with the program...face)

Alrighty then..the next day the Auslӓnderbehӧrde opens at 8am.  At this point I figure, I arrived 5 hours early for them opening at 1pm, but since this is really early in the morning I'll show up at 4am and see if that is early enough. This time I'm prepared with a sleeping bag, a thick coat and tea...I'm ready for it all! I arrive at 3:45am to find the doors already open, and I'm Wartenummer 22.  Ok, I'm probably not early enough for an appointment but I'll wait 4 hours and try anyways.

Side note: During this whole process I learned all kinds of new sleeping positions, and I learned how little I really care about sleeping weirdly in front of other people, and vice versa.

And...no Wartenummer.  

That evening (I think, it's still a bit of a blur), Jens and I are out with some friends of his of which many are internationals, and I share my story.  At the dinner table I heard their stories, and one story was of a person who showed up at midnight in order to get a Wartenummer at 8am.  More information I find out is that there are often only 2 available Wartenummer per day, because it's all based on how many unexpected cancelled appointments there were for that day.

Woah there...ok, I'm a bit intimidated at this point. But I'm like, ok this is my dream, work hard to get your dream right? I can wait overnight at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde, I can totally do this.  You see, as an american I'm sitting here thinking the following, "I'm going to be by myself, in the dark, sitting outside this building, near a slightly industrial area in the middle of a big city".  I'm nervous..and I can hear my relatives telling me not to do it because it's too dangerous. You see I've been told not to go running alone late at night (that means after 8pm) in the US. So for many europeans/germans they think I'm this crazy american, being scared.  That still doesn't mean I'm not fighting against my cultural instincts here.

Anyways, the next time I arrive at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde I show up at 10:45pm, because they are to open at 7:30am the next day...

Side note: Did I mention they have different operating hours every day, so I had to reassess each day when I was to arrive? And as my story progressed I learned new information so I was continually having to reassess my arrival time.  

...I have my gear, I'm ready.  I show up and there are already 15 people in line.  At this point I'm like, what the f**k there is no point in staying, but seriously folks.  I ask those waiting when they showed up to wait in line and I'm greeted with crickets.  No one is talking (or they don't understand english or german, either way), and when I thought about it, it was obvious. You don't want to share because in case you don't get an appointment you'll have to show up again the next day.

Side note: Just because they often have approx. 2 Wartenummer for cancelled appointments that doesn't mean they actually have them every day.  Sometimes they don't have any Wartenummer because no one cancels. That means you might be waiting in line for your Wartenummer for five hours with nothing to show for it.

Eventually one person did pipe up and state that she showed up at 10pm and there were 20 others that had shown up but left, and that they had friends holding their place, so there were in fact more like 35 people in line at that point.

So I'm stressed, right?  When exactly am I going to be able to make this work? How early do I really need to show up?  How can I make this work when I have to use a restroom overnight? Would I need to buy that tool to allow women to pee like men and bring a bottle? Or would I need to find the German version of Depends to make it work?

Then Easter weekend shows up on me, something I hadn't even thought about because all I did every day was think about the Auslӓnderbehӧrde. I find out that their hours changed for Thursday, and that Friday and Monday they wouldn't be open for the holiday weekend. At this point, there wasn't anything else I could even do until Tuesday. But...oh wait..on Tuesdays they aren't even open, so I can't try to get an appointment until Wednesday!

So...my plan became this.  I'll drop by work on Tuesday, explain the situation, and see if they are willing to push my start date to past my appointment on the 6th of May so my new start date would be the 15th of May.  I arrive at work and no one's there, still on vacation from the Easter Holiday it seems. I send an email and get an automated response saying anyone who can make such a decision isn't there, but they will be back the next day.  Alrighty then...Let's try  again at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde.  

I figured I would show up on Tuesday night around 7pm-ish, see what the line looks like and if it's bad already I will simply go to work on Wednesday and try to explain in person. I had bought myself a camp chair at some point to make the whole process easier too, so I bring that instead of a sleeping bag this time as the weather had gotten a lot warmer. At this point I'm pretty pessimistic that I'll get a Wartenummer.  Here's a picture of me when I get there at 725pm.

I was the first one to show up! I couldn't believe it, I was so flabbergasted. I set up my chair, brought out my waiting gear (see other definition: kindle, phone with downloaded Netflix episodes, Spotify playlists).  Not more than 30 minutes after I showed up someone else arrived, said that they normally start a list, and then he made a list with my name first, and then he wrote his name and left. I wasn't sure about the list thing, I hadn't heard about it before, so I figured I would stay to be sure.

It was a pretty nice evening so the first 3 hours were no big deal. Around 9pm people started showing up. Around 10pm it started to get a bit cold but I had brought my down jacket so I was ok. I started drifting in and out of sleep. I remember bolting awake just after midnight hearing the, I believe, turkish guy who had been sitting next to me holding people back saying I was first in line, as they had just opened the doors to let us in to wait inside. Kind of bleary eyed and panicky I grabbed my things and went inside. It didn't really matter though, because the security guy who let us in just took the list, after confirming everyone was on it, and then we waited another 2 hours. Weird sleeping positions abounded, but somehow snoring never showed up.

I definitely slept some more inside.  Warm, in my camp chair (me and that camp chair are now good friends), I waited. At 2am we all got our little slips of paper, which I coveted and stored securely before I jumped on my bike and took off for home.  

I had hoped to get some more sleep when I got home, but after that 25 minute bike ride I was awake again. I also knew I had to wake up in 3 hours to bike back to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde, so I was nervous to fall asleep in case I didn't actually wake up with my alarm. Instead I just took it easy, ate some food, packed my paperwork and headed back out there around 5:45ish.  I show up and…

Side Note: I waited in one particular spot in the waiting area inside when I showed back up and the other 5 after me in line gravitated towards me and waited around me like I was a beacon.  It was rather strange and humorous, or perhaps I was just sleep deprived?

...finally my number gets called at 8am when they open.  I got an actual Wartenummer! Hallelujah!!  I go upstairs for the open appointment. I go inside, bring all my paperwork out, and after 10 minutes of review they find a missing piece of information.  

Unfortunately it was on the paperwork confirming my living situation, something only Guillaume could officially answer as the owner of the apartment. It's even more unfortunate because he's currently in Argentina for work. I had no idea when he would even wake up, let alone see a message from me about the situation.  At this point I'm like, s**t, I was first in line but I'm still not going to get this finished today. Luckily she tells me an email from him confirming such and such is fine, and that if they get the email before 2pm that day I can show up and go straight back upstairs to that room and finish processing my paperwork. Also, that if I don't hear back from him before 2pm, I need to email them an update and they will try to fit me in before I'm supposed to start work. Ok, I'm exhausted, but I bike off to work to give them an update. That maybe, just maybe, I can start on the 1st of May.  

Then I bike home, super exhausted now...wait wait, I stopped off at the store first and bought a pastry and some pringles because I'm also super hungry at this point, and go home. Oh man, I was beat walking through that store. If it had been slightly worse I might have been drooling as I walked around.

So now I'm laying on the couch for the next couple of hours, trying to stay slightly awake in case I get a message from Guillaume or the Auslӓnderbehӧrde. Then around 10:15am Guillaume messages me like the Superman that he is. Guillaume: "Is there still time?" Me: "Are you wearing a cape?" *something akin to Avengers/Superman theme music is now playing in my sleep deprived brain...OMG I'm so happy at this point*.  He quickly sends the necessary email, and the previously super exhausted me who is now wide awake takes a quick shower and jumps back on her bike to bike back, a 3rd time, to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde.  

I get there with 30 minutes to spare before their lunch break. The person helping me is also training someone else so I guess it takes 5 more minutes for my paperwork to get finished.  The actual processing time for the paperwork was so short, but everything leading up to it was so drawn out and exhausting, I was stunned at the end.

Me: "Das War's?" (definition: that's it?)

Nice Lady: "Ja." (see other definition: ah you're so cute, what did you expect?)

Elated I bike off to the copy shop to make copies of my Aufenthaltstitle for work. I'm almost dancing on my bike, singing to the music on my phone. I'm overjoyed that it's finally done! I make copies, and dropped them off at work. Once home I'm so exhausted but still awake that it took me a bit but eventually I passed out.  I think I passed out around...2pm? I'm not sure really.  I just know I snacked hard on peanuts and chocolate before I fell asleep. I woke up this morning just before 6am, and have been until now writing this all up for ya'll to enjoy.

Ok, this was a bit drawn out, but seriously guys the whole process was intense. There were several times these past few weeks when I wanted to cry because of messed up sleeping schedules, unknowns, and the fear of having to leave the country and then come back in three months because I might have missed something.

Revelation: I have an even more profound respect for immigrants now. I have an inkling of what it must be like for people waiting in lines for things like water in 3rd world countries.

I met some really interesting people during this experience. The people waiting in line like me were from everywhere but europe or the US. I met some interesting people from Japan, Taiwan, Tunisia, Uzbekistan, Turkey, and India. Those were the people who I actually bothered to ask where they came from. They were also the people who understood what I was asking. I honestly cannot imagine how hard it must have been for those who didn't speak much english or german.  

I have a request for anyone reading this blog entry. After reading my small commentary as someone without much of a language barrier and a lot of local help I hope I can share this with you all. This process for me was exhausting, confusing, and at times frightening. But can you imagine, after reading my tale, just how much harder it must be for those trying to immigrate in Germany or the US, who didn't have the help I did?  How hard it must be for those who don't know the languages I know, and...for those who didn't have the skin tone I have? Let's also mention that I was, by far, the worst dressed out of the bunch. Oregonians, already known as rather lowkey in attire for the US, and here I am in jeans and a hoodie waiting in line next to others dressed super nice.  Despite that I feel I still had an easier time of it simply from the lack of language barrier, and I'm sure some unconscious white privilege that came along with it.

Whelp my coffee's gone cold, and I'm starting to get hungry. Thanks to everyone who has supported me on this journey, a life goal of mine, to live and work in Germany as an adult. I didn't realize just how much of a dream this was until after leaving that office. The sunny bike ride from the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to work, when I should have been exhausted, was one of sheer joy. A life experience that I hope I never forget. With this I leave you with my theme song during this adventure, "Can't Knock the Hustle" by Weezer.      

[yazminnoemi-blog]

My Semi-Charmed Mental Breakdown

Preface

Mental illness refers to a wide range of mental health conditions — disorders that affect your mood, thinking and behavior. Facing off with these disorders is a challenge especially when you don’t know what you’re doing. I use to think I had to defeat my mental illness on my own in one day. Throughout my life I have realized it’s an ongoing battle. You don’t just get to wake up one day and be like yay I’m happy and never going to feel that way again. Writing about these experiences has opened up my eyes to the fact that it’s a lifelong fight to deal with your mental illness. Sometimes you can’t defeat it, you just have to learn to live with it.

Thanks for joining the breakdown  

They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. Over and over in my head I repeat those three words. If I say it in my head maybe I can wish it out into the universe. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. They love you, you belong. I said these last couple out loud because maybe that would strengthen the meaning behind it. Maybe it would make it more believable for me. Unfortunately there is still that nagging voice in the back of my head. They do not care. They do not miss you. You are forgotten. You are nothing! It screams over everything in my head telling me not to listen to the voice. All of the good memories, all of the phone calls, the texts, all of the kind words falling onto now deaf ears since all I can hear are the words being shouted at me from inside my head. You do not matter. You never mattered. You will never matter. It adds a dark film over all of the memories I use to look at with such happiness and shows me every mistake I made up until this point in my existence. It taunts me every day of my life. It has popped up in different forms throughout my entire life but it does have one quite general name: mental illness.

Depression; it is the first and most consistent form of mental illness that has impacted my life. It did not start with me. I watched my mom struggle with depression for years before I even knew what it was. When I was around the age of 4 or 5 I remember thinking my mom was a Disney princess because of how well put together and happy she seemed. She always had her make-up done perfectly, and when she was with my dad, they lit up the room.

. When I was about 9 everything changed. She stopped putting on her make up every day and caring how she looked. I could hear her arguing with my dad when she thought my sister and I had fallen asleep.  The most vivid memory that sticks out in my mind though was from when I was 11 years old. I came home to find my mom in bed. It was odd because it was 4pm and my mom did not get home until usually 7 or 8pm. When I walked into the bedroom to make sure she was okay my stomach dropped. Her eyes seemed so far off, kind of glassy and dead, and she had tears streaking down her face. The sight of her scared me but I figured maybe today was just a bad day. She had a couple of bad days here and there throughout the years so maybe today was just a really bad one. It turned out I was wrong because that bad day had turned into two bad weeks. She stayed in bed for two weeks, calling off work, barely wanting to leave her room. I could hear her in the room crying with the door closed but when I would knock and see if she needed anything she would yell out “I’m fine!” and “Mami will be all right sweetie”. Her hiding away in her room, denying her emotions, ignoring the breakdown is something I know she was taught. Always put on a brave face. Don’t let anyone see you break down; they will perceive you as weak. It is a lesson that my mother unknowingly passed down to my sister and me.

I noticed around 13 that I did not feel as much like myself as usual. The things I loved became boring and tedious. Learning new things in school became such an unsatisfying task that I had to be bribed into learning the coursework so I could pass. I was just barely getting by and I did not understand why everything changed. That is also around the time the voice started. Where no matter what I did right it found something wrong. Where a good time happened it would point out the bad. I started to put myself down and find the bad in any situation so I could have a reason for being so sad, so unlike myself. I waited for someone else to notice that something was wrong, because obviously if no one else sees anything wrong maybe I am just being melodramatic. How could I feel so out of place without anyone noticing a difference in me? Well I got my wish of someone noticing the minute I came home and told my parents that I never wanted to sing again. Singing was a passion of mine and I had done everything in my power to improve my voice up until that point. I had been in choirs, sang almost every song in the car, and even took voice lessons. The day I came home and told them I wanted to quit singing was the day I broke my parents’ heart and made them see just how different I had become. I broke down crying in the middle of the doorway, telling them there was no purpose to singing. “I’m not even good enough to do anything with it,” I exclaimed. “Why waste the time and money on me?” I told them there was nothing special with the way I sang and then I just shut down. I sat on the ground, wrapped my arms around my legs, and just sat there waiting for them to say something. Nothing they said would make me feel better but I knew they were trying. I heard there words like they were far off in the distance. “You are an amazing singer”, and “You are so talented”, and “Everything is going to be fine”, were all sentences that I can remember but I did not believe a single one of them.

Spiraling through the depressive states left me a little worse for wear but when the anxiety and panic attacks started it made everything ten times worse. I was in sixth grade when I had my first panic attack. I did not even realize it was a panic attack until years later when I thought about what had happened. I remember the day was a haze where all I could think about was getting home so I could curl up under my blanket and hide from the world. I ended up leaving school two hours early due to the fact that I was in the nurse’s office unable to breathe. My dad worked at the elementary school down the block so he picked me up and took me home. I could tell he was extremely worried by all the glances he kept casting my way on our walk to the house. When the door opened I immediately felt better. I walked to my room, changed into my favorite pajamas, and went to the living room to spend time with my dad. Being near him has always made me feel better and I hoped today would be no different. Before I made to the living room I heard him on the phone with my mom. I hid in the dining room trying to listen to what was happening.

“She told the nurse she was having a hard time breathing Raquel.” There was a pause which must have meant my mother was talking now. It was a long pause and when I took a peek around the corner my dad’s head was in his hands.

“No she’s fine now. We are going to hang out until you come home then we can talk more about it.” Another long pause and then a sigh. “I understand that but we can’t force her to talk to us. I don’t think she needs to go to the hospital but she does need to talk to someone. Honey we can talk more when you are home. Maybe I can try and figure out a bit more while we watch tv. I love you.” My dad set his phone down and I finally decided to come out from my hiding spot. I sniffled, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall down my face. I sit down next to him on the couch, wrap myself in the blanket, and lean my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me and starts to rub my back.

“Sweetie, are you really okay? This doesn’t seem like a breathing issue since you are breathing okay right now. Did you want to talk about something?” When I looked into my dad’s eyes I broke down. I held onto him and started to sob.

“I just haven’t felt good all day. I had to present to the class and I messed up. Then I almost started crying in front of everyone. After that my chest started to feel tight and like I wasn’t getting any air. I almost passed out in class so then I went to the nurse. I was so scared you were going to say I couldn’t come home because I know the rule is if you aren’t bleeding or dying you need to stay but I really felt like I couldn’t make it.” I rushed through the story like my life depended on it. I felt like I was being so melodramatic but it was the only way to get away from school. I needed to leave that place so badly. It was so hard to have to face all of the people I thought were friends. I thought they were my friends and I am sure they made fun of me; I am sure none of them cared I left. Why would they care? I am just a place holder friend. As these thoughts spiraled through my head I started to get that tight feeling in my chest.

All I wanted was to be left alone and some peace and quiet. I thought pushing everyone away would give me time to work on me and make me better. I tried therapy, meditation, medication, and everything in between. Nothing made that empty feeling inside me go away. Sometimes I was able to distract myself from it. When I was younger I would use basketball as my get away, then I started high school and theatre was my new big distraction. I was still feeling that nagging, empty feeling but I focused all of my energy on the distractions instead of what was wrong. Senior year of high school it spiraled out of control.

I was walking home from school late one night after theatre had ended and decided I would take the long way home. I only lived about two miles away and it was nice to have some time alone. I was fine for about 5 minutes before the weird thoughts started. I would glance out into the road and the first thought that popped up would say “Just take one step out and it’ll be over,” or “How fast do you think a car would have to be going to just hurt you?” After about 3 more instances of comments like that I decided to put on my headphones and blast my music. I hoped it would distract me from the horrible thoughts I was having.

“No one would visit you if you got hurt. Who would care about a girl like you? All you do is whine and complain and nothing bad has ever even happened to you. You are a spoiled brat.” The music wasn’t drowning out the thoughts it was just giving them a backbeat, making it easier to remember them. After 15 more minutes I was hyperventilating and needed to sit down to count. One tactic I had learned to shut up the voices in my head was to count up to 4, tapping each finger on my thumb. On a good day I just had to tap but I days like the one I was experiencing I was practically shouting the numbers while digging my nails into my thumb.

Why isn’t it working? Why can’t I make the voices stop?!

“It’s because you deserve every bad thing that has ever happened to you. You deserve to be tortured like this, to know that everyone hates you even though you try your hardest to fit in. You would never fit in because no one could ever accept a piece of trash person like you.” The voice kept getting louder and louder, more horrible things being hurled at me as tears fell down my face. “You are pathetic. You are a waste of space that doesn’t deserve to take up other peoples’ time. Obviously no one cares about you. You are sarcastic, loud, and force yourself into other peoples’ lives when they don’t need or want you. Why do you think everyone keeps leaving? Why do you think-?” The voice finally shut up. I didn’t understand why until I felt the pressure on my forearm. I glanced down and saw that I had begun to dig my nails into my skin. I removed them only to see little drops of blood traveling down my forearm. I decided then that hurting myself was the only way to get the voices to stopped.

It worked for a bit, that was until my best friend noticed. I started to wear long sleeves and pants all the time since I had started to lose room on my arms to mark up, my legs were the next area to be attacked. It was a week before graduation when my best friend, Crystal pulled me aside and mentioned the change in my wardrobe.

“Yazmin, you hate pants. I don’t think I have seen you wear a pair unless it’s below 30 degrees. Now you’re wearing long sleeves AND pants. What is going on?” She looked at me with concern in her eyes. I couldn’t tell her what I was doing but I also couldn’t look her in the eyes and straight up lie to her. I was fidgeting with the sleeves when she lightly punched my arm.

“Hey dork. What is it? Is everything okay? You’ve been kind of distant lately and it’s scaring me. We can’t go off to college with you being all in your head all the time.” I took a breath and told her what I had realized.

“It makes the voices stop,” I muttered under my breath, rolling up my sleeve, “and sometimes they don’t start at all because I can sense when it’s about to start so I do this first.” I started to show her how I would dig my nails into my skin when she grabbed my arm and stopped me.

“Yazmin, you do that one more time and I am going to beat your ass.” I looked up to see a glaring Crystal and pulled my arm back.

“I just wanted to stop being told I was a piece of trash. I feel so worthless sometimes and the voices hurt more than the actual pain in my arm so I figured I’d choose one evil over the other.” I shrugged my shoulders, sat down on the ground, and stared at my feet. She sat down next to me and hugged me super tight and didn’t let go until I pushed her off.

“We all love you stupid. That voice in your head is not something you should listen to. Listen to me. I am your best friend and I will always be here for you. I will make sure that I tell you as much as I can how much I appreciate you. You are one of the best things to happen to me Yazmin and I can’t imagine my world without you in it.”

It dawned on me then all of the things that people had been trying to tell me throughout the years. Things including how important I was, how special I was, how worthwhile I was, and most importantly how much I was loved. My depression and anxiety have not gone away and that little voice in my head is still saying those horrendous things to me but I have learned to live with them and hopefully someday soon I will learn how to defeat them for good

[unsp0ken-details]

Moments to Cherish (2)

"Its so funny how so much of 'Finding Yourself' in adulthood is simply getting back to who you were and what you loved as a child" I've often thought about this and a part of me believes in this. As one grows over the years, we are exposed to more complex truths of lives, newer experiences, and live in the 'grey' - we go on a little quest to 'find ourselves': our true interests, what makes us happy, gives us true joy etc. In agreement with the statement, one of the places to find that is our childhood. Childhood: to the times where we loved, experimented, experienced, indulged without reason all while we were yet to discover the meaning of 'regret' and before applying the concept of 'overthinking'. One of my 'Happy Places' to be when I'm particularly in a thoughtful mood is thinking about my childhood memories. The things my friends and I did in school, Aadarsh's new antics, things I gave importance to, tactics which I thought made me smarter than my parents and so much more! I'd like to write about a few of them in no particular order: 1) I always liked have long hair. However, I didn't know the difference between straight/wavy/curly hair. I remember an image I saw on a magazine of a girl much younger than me (I was in grade 6 or 7 at the time) and she had a particular hairband that I wanted to pull of that look. Since I'd wash hair on Sat's I remember, getting that magazine, and wearing a black hairband with dots (the one I bought) and making sure I wore in how it was shown in the picture and feeling proud and waiting to pull it off better to achieve the length of hair she had in that photo. 2) 9 years of my formal education was in India and a majority of it included memorisation when it came to tests and exams. For the most part since childhood, I've studied alone but there were the few times I would go to Amma when I couldn't memorise a long answer. Having her simply read out the answer and break it into parts would make it SO much easier for me to learn (the part I'm conveniently skipping here is that they also involved crying if she decided to test me on other questions..) but nevertheless the end result was that I always hoped for this question to come in the exam as I was the best prepared. 3) "I don't care". I can't pin point exactly where I picked that up from when I was younger, but it was a brief phase where if anyone said anything/commented, I'd respond I don't care. Never to be rude, but I thought that's how it is used. However, a quick full stop on that phase came when I saw that my younger brother was picking up on it. Anything you ask him/commented, his reply was I don't care. The effect of this stayed with me for long, I have after that never used that phrase in a reply to anyone (except to convince people - good context). 4) Middle school years were interesting schedule wise. I enjoyed school and doing well, participating, taking up responsibility/roles etc. Amma would wake me up in the morning, shower (sometimes we settled on a bargain), she'd comb my hair and with a shirt, skirt, tie, belt, socks and black polished shoes and a heavy bag - we were ready to conquer the day. Amma would come down with me daily to cross the road and wait till the bus came. That's were I'd meet, Garima and Reeta aunty daily (her mom) and began our friendship :) I'd be back from school, change, eat and get back to STUDYING?! voluntarily. I enjoyed going through the diary with homework tasks or revise what we learnt in class. Made me feel productive. Evening would go down to play with brother or with Garima depending on what we'd planned that day during our bus ride back home. Would come back home by 8, it was always between 5-7 or 6-8pm. Extending this time by 30 minutes excited me more than I can believe now. Evening is when, appa would be back and I'd be having dinner by then, while we watched TV/news and slept. On weekends, I remember, I'd wait to start having my lunch around 1:30 as that's when "Karishma ka Karishma" came on TV and would go to amma's room where she was sleeping and watch that and then from 2-2:30 watch Kya Mast Hai Life (loved this) and quietly switched it off and came out to play with aadarsh. I still don't know why I didnt watch these in the TV in the hall or why I had to wait to have my lunch at that time (something with amma sleeping helped -- in the case that I might have to leave out some vegetables I didn't like having). 5) When I was younger (primary school years) and during a visit to Chennai, appa once asked Sruthi and I if we wanted to go to the beach at 5/6am. I was fascinated by the idea (not the beach, or the timing) but that appa wanted to do something with me and asked me if I wanted to join. I remember waking up really early, taking an auto and going Marina beach. We went near the water and it was a beautiful sight. Not many people around and just us three. Appa and kids. That's where I remember my chappal or maybe sruthi's floating away. There was a sudden rush of feeling scared since something we owned was going away + the risks of going to get it (I'll admit I tried and didn't think about the depth of the water/waves). Then a fisherman uncle as I want to call him - went into to get that chappal for us. I was SO SO THANKFUL and amazed that he'd do that for us. Now that I share this, I realise it was sruthi's chappal as I clunched on to mine harder. 6)  One of the things I maintained for many years was that I didn't like when Appa went on office trips. I believed that he went on those trips because I 'allowed' him. He'd ask me and obviously first choice is no but a small little explanation and I'd let him go for no more than 2 days (anything longer was only allowed counting flight hours). Now I'm aware it wasn't my permission as much as his convincing but now also I'd like if and push that they go through me (they do). The last permission I refused might've been me saying - Jakarta?! I don't want to move there and leave Delhi (I'd finally settled after 7 years) but same year we moved to Mumbai.... Another example with trips is that on one particular instance, I didn't want appa to travel. He was going to Mumbai and we were in Bangalore at the time and he said he'd go and come back the same day. I thought my crying made that happen (I really thought I influenced him a lot) but its something I didn't believe. He said he'd be back at 8pm and I remember standing in front of the clock staring at the wall for it to turn 8. It was the very first time I saw the hour hand in a clock move (Was told you cannot see it move as obvious as a minute hand). And to seeing appa at 8 - I thought that was magic. When I was younger, I refused to go to sleep when asked/earlier - purely because I hadn't seen appa that day. I disliked eating without him and sleeping without seeing him. Amma would push to go to sleep and I'd give in and do first class acting of closing my eyes if amma opened the door (I'd flinch my eyes because of the light so she always knew) but I thought I'd fooled her. I'd wait for appa to come and wish goodnight even if sleeping and acted like I was woken up by him (had to sell the story). 7) I remember vividly telling amma (was very very young) denying paruppu saadham once. I don't know why or how that when I said so and she didn't push me (it gets mixed with rice that she thinks I didn't know). Around the time is also when I remember I didn't like milk very much (especially the end part/last few sips). I'd drink 3/4 and on the pre-text of washing the glass, would throw rest of the paal. Again, thought I was SLY as a fly. But I am very very nervous doing something  like this so when appa called/saw me, I freaked out. Either he guessed or I owned up to it and we made a deal to not tell amma (I am sure this was broken from his end). 8) I wanted glasses, braces, to have a fractured arm/leg. Don't question me on these. I only got to try amma's glasses from now and then but she would not allow. I also wanted bangs (flicks, what it was called then) but had no knowledge of hair type/style. I tried to cut a small part over a period of days thinking its not obvious and would pin them so amma didn't see and when she asked - I said its new hair growing. Don't laugh. Now I am a MUCH MUCH better liar - to the extent that I'd like the opposite person to figure out I am lying sometimes. 9) I loved wearing heels. Its not the height or design but the sound they make. So, more than heels, LOVED wooden floors. I wanted them so I could wear heels and keep walking back and forth and feel like an office woman giving presentations/writing on whiteboards (also, my favourite thing when I went to appa's office). I remember I had a Barbie set I think (Heels + jewellery) - I thought jewellery sucked in design/flashy but heels I wore over stairs as the next best thing to hear the sound. But I didn't use it often because it was pink. 10) I remember the first time I was introduced to English songs and it was Love Story & Tik Tok. I didn't know where to hear it but wrote down lyrics from what my friends sang and daily night would read and memorize the lyrics with aadarsh. He picked up tik tok faster even. This was pre-youtube so the English song I discovered by myself was Ibiza because it was on our itunes on a Sony Vaio laptop. (I used youtube AFTER aadarsh who used it before me in Vietnam). - I'd shared that I like getting gifts under the pillow. For NY's once, aadarsh had Rs 50 and we went to a store and he asked for Rs 20 more from appa because we were at a store and I'd mentioned I liked a notebook that had a button to open and close. I knew he was getting it for me but wanted to get after I sat in the car and called appa to come to the store. That morning I woke up to aadarsh eagerly waiting for me to be up and said look under the pillow - and there he had kept the notebook that he bought with the money he'd saved for me. - Aaadarsh, when he was younger had a phase with hearing problem when we had ENT visits and hearing tests. I am not good with anyone close visiting the doctor for anything more than what's a normal fever/cold. ENT was a fancy name and hearing that he has fluid in his head for which he'd need surgery, was not a good news. I remember rushing home, sitting on the study table where I had a small glass ganesha idol (I won this in a Tumbola - Jaldi 5 contest) and I sat in front of the idol - daily for weeks praying that I don't want him to have surgery. After a few weeks when the doctor said, the fluid reduced and he doesn't need surgery - I went to say thanks and never made a wish after. - Aadarsh calls me Akka. He's seldom called/used my name in a sentence. I can't imagine him saying Pavi. But when he was about 3-5 years, my favourite & precious gift is him writing - Happy Birthday, Akka with amma holding his hand and finding that in the morning. However, the habit to call me 'Akka; stuck because I said I won't talk to him if he doesn't call me akka. This tactic doesn't work now :/ - My most lasting impact on him was when I was disappointed at something aadarsh did/said (not acceptable behaviour) and I said I wouldn't talk. I didn't and just when I was to give up (I can't stay mad at him), he'd gone crying to amma and appa asking them to convince me to speak with him. He literally hugged it out with us both making promises. - I learn better when I teach aadarsh. I've taught him grade 10 math, economics etc in grade 5 to help me learn. But grade 11 and me struggling with physics was an interesting experience. I was trying to teach him different types of energy (Kinetic, potential etc) and was highlighting the differences when aadarsh drew something he learnt at school that explained the concepts better. Here's my understanding of Potential Energy (imagining his drawing, a stick figure - moving from atop a cliff to the bottom has displayed potential energy. Not sure who can confirm this for me but at the time, what he taught me helped me manage that unit test.

[lopezdorothy70-blog]

Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You?

By now you may know a little bit about how a ketogenic diet can be beneficial for fighting cancer, lowering inflammation, and losing weight. But what about our unique health needs as women? It turns out that there are variations of the standard ketogenic diet that may be especially beneficial for us and the health concerns that we face, especially as we get older!

Here's a breakdown of what it is and how it can be helpful for you.

The Ketogenic Diet and Women

Diving into the details of a diet can be just as confusing as that search to find the right one. I know that was the case for me when I first discovered the ketogenic diet. It can seem daunting at first, so I'll start with the basics.

The process of burning fat for energy (instead of glucose) is called “ketosis” (hence the term “ketogenic”). There are amazing mechanisms that kick in with our immune system, metabolism, and detoxification pathways when we move into ketosis.

I don't have to tell you that I have a passion for empowering individuals to treat and beat cancer naturally, so when I learned that following a ketogenic diet could potentially help reverse cancer, I got excited!

Of course, the only constant is change, right? Now that keto has gone mainstream, more research is focusing on how the diet works for specific groups of people. Researchers are discovering that a ketogenic diet can be very effective in healing conditions in addition to cancer, such as diabetes and autoimmune disease.

Experts are also discovering how ketosis works a bit differently depending on gender. One of the primary differences between us ladies and the men is hormones. When our bodies suffer from prolonged stress and poor eating habits, it is often our hormones that bear the brunt of the abuse.

Imbalances in the endocrine system can be the cause of dozens of nasty side effects, all of which can lead to chronic disease.

To get an idea of just how many women are suffering from hormone-related conditions, take a look at these scary statistics:

According to an analysis conducted by John Hopkins University, autoimmune conditions affected roughly eight percent of the U.S. population in 2004. 79% of these cases were women.1

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Kidney Disease, the thyroid autoimmune condition Hashimoto's thyroiditis is about 8 times more common in women than men.2

Women are also up to ten times more likely to get non-autoimmune related hypothyroidism than men.3

According to the American Cancer Society, ovarian cancer is the number one reproductive system cancer for women and uterine cancer is close behind. In addition, one in eight women will receive a breast cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives.4

Women ages 20 to 34 have a higher rate of type 2 diabetes than men because of the changes that occur during pregnancy, which can lead to gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes later in life.5

According to the American Psychological Association, women bear most of the brunt in terms of self-reported feelings of stress. Adrenal fatigue and burnout, which effects hormonal balance, is largely a result of chronic stress.6

The Cyclical Ketogenic Diet: Why It May be Best for Women's Health

As you can see by the heartbreaking statistics above, women have unique challenges when it comes to hormones, stress, and chronic disease. That is why many women respond best to modified versions of the ketogenic diet. One version that is becoming increasingly popular is the Cyclical Ketogenic Diet, or CKD.

In a nutshell, individuals who are on a CKD eat the standard ketogenic diet (roughly 20-30% protein, 5-10% carbohydrates and 60-80% fat) most of the week. One day a week, however, they “carb up.” This means they eat a moderate amount of carbs, even lower amounts of fat, and about the same amount of protein as on ketogenic days.

Both the standard ketogenic diet and the cyclic ketogenic diet are based on the concept of “feast or famine,” but in slightly different ways. During ketosis, your body thinks that it is in “famine mode” all of the time. Because of this, there will always be a subtle amount of stress on the body and on metabolism.

If you are a healthy individual and want to employ the ketogenic diet long-term, some research indicates that you may be able to do this safely.7 If you already have hormone-related issues, a ketogenic diet's anti-inflammatory and mitochondrial-boosting effects can help you as well, but you'll need to monitor how you feel more closely and take it slow. Gradually introducing your body to the CKD can do this.

The CKD allows your body a rest with a feasting day when you eat more carbs. The rest of the week can be spent eating a standard ketogenic diet. I recommend starting out slow by cutting down on your carb load and then pushing the envelope just a little every week until you are in ketosis most of the week.

Another important tip to keep in mind with CKD is that carb-up days are not a license to eat junk. On feasting days, you still don't want to go wild with the pasta and bread! Continue to eat healthy, whole, organic foods and keep the sugary foods out of your diet. I like to make one meal on my feasting day moderately carb-heavy and the other two meals and snacks keto-friendly.

And here is a little hack if you decide to give CKD a try: Slow-carb foods like sweet potatoes and quinoa are great for feasting days. In addition, sprinkle a little apple cider vinegar on your food or drink some with water 15 minutes before eating a meal to help with blood sugar issues. I have done this on many occasions, especially on super busy days when I know I need a boost.

Intermittent Fasting and the CKD

Intermittent fasting (IF) became a big deal after a 2012 study from the University of Hail in Saudi Arabia made headlines. The study found that IF during Ramadan increased immune system cell growth and lowered proinflammatory cytokines in healthy individuals.8 In fact, research on the benefits of IF is now widespread. A 2013 study conducted by Thomas Jefferson University discovered that IF slowed the growth of primary cancer tumors and also decreased the number of new ones in breast cancer patients.9

Many experts also advise periods of intermittent fasting throughout the week on both your ketogenic days and feasting days. Intermittent fasting is gentler on the body than going through a regular fast. And in my opinion, gentler is better for us women, especially if you suffer from hormonal imbalance or high stress levels.

Most people follow the 16/8 rule: they do not eat from roughly 8pm in the evening through 10am the next day. If it is difficult for you to go that long without eating, shoot for a 12 hour fast including sleep time.

Then work your way up to a longer fasting period from there if you can. You can also eat a small amount of fat first thing in the morning or at night. Many folks swear by a coconut oil-infused bulletproof coffee first thing in the morning.

One of many great options you may enjoy in the evening is a relaxing keto version of the popular “golden milk.” This is a yummy beverage made from frothing almond milk together with healing turmeric, a little cinnamon, a dash of black pepper and ginger, and a little coconut oil. I like to put a pinch of stevia in it to give it a sweet zing. Delicious! I also like the fact that at the end of the day, I am getting a little bit of anti-inflammatory turmeric in my system. The turmeric is warming and encourages a good night's sleep.10

The best news is that eating healthy fat during your IF period is not really a cheat. It will not pull you out of ketosis on your ketogenic days and can actually help build robust ketones in the body.

6 Reasons Why a Cyclical Ketogenic Diet May Be for You

Here are some situations where a woman may want to consider going on a cyclic ketogenic diet:

If you have a thyroid imbalance. This could include hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism or Hashimoto's. Introducing ketosis slowly and allowing time for rest through carb-up days keeps the metabolism regulated and conserves thyroid-related metabolic functions.

If you have adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue syndrome is when the adrenal glands are not producing enough hormones to keep up with demand; they never really “turn off.” It is most often caused by chronic stress and can lead to adrenal exhaustion if left unchecked. Staying in ketosis for long periods of time sometimes leads to a reduction in adrenal-related sex hormones and this makes the adrenals work even harder. Taking some time off from ketosis every week allows the adrenals to rest and reset.

If you are going through perimenopause or menopause. Following a CK diet can be beneficial for women going through menopause. Research indicates that aging women as well as men can reap great benefits from the IF aspects of the CKD. Fasting allows for a break from digestion, when the body can focus on repair of all systems, including the reproductive and endocrine systems. Just be sure to watch for energy changes and take a break from IF if your estrogen levels begin to vary too much.11

If you want to lose weight safely (and steadily). When I first did the ketogenic diet, I was amazed at how the weight just seemed to melt off for the first few weeks. Then, to my disappointment, I seemed to hit a plateau. If this happens to you, switching to a cyclic ketogenic diet may kick your metabolism into gear again. Many women also experience success getting off the plateau by choosing a consistent IF schedule, including regular “eating windows”- and then sticking to it! Try different times of day (for example, eating between 10 am to 6 pm first then switching to noon to 8 pm). Eventually you will find the sweet spot where you will start to lose weight again until your body reaches its ideal healthy weight.

You are experiencing some not-so-healthy side effects of the standard keto diet. These could include losing your menstrual cycle altogether, having trouble sleeping, and experiencing brittle nails, among other things. Symptoms may be giving you an indication that you are overstressing our body and may need to switch to the CKD.

If you have type 2 diabetes. Research has proven that eating a ketogenic diet even temporarily can have great healing benefits for most diabetics. This is because type 2 diabetes is caused by too much sugar. The best way to restore insulin sensitivity is to simply stop the heavy sugar load. If you follow the standard keto diet, this takes care of the problem.12

Most experts warn not to jump in to ketosis too fast if you are diabetic. Ease into it gradually by lowering your carb count over a few weeks. It may also be wise to do a shortened version of the CKD by “cycling out” of ketosis every once in a while with a moderately carb-heavy meal. A 2005 study published in the journal Nutrition & Metabolism found that people with type 2 diabetes who were also on the ketogenic diet saw major improvements in insulin sensitivity after just three weeks.13

Type 2 diabetes is an autoimmune condition. Since so many women suffer from some kind of autoimmunity, I would like to say one final word here about these conditions in general. Being on a cyclic ketogenic diet gives you the best of both worlds. You are allowing your body to rest one or more days a week yet lowering inflammation and increasing glutathione levels through ketosis and IF the rest of the week. A 2015 study on individuals with multiple sclerosis found that following a ketogenic diet greatly improved mitochondrial function and increased glutathione levels in the body naturally.14

When Should You Avoid the Ketogenic Diet Completely?

If you are suffering from severe thyroid imbalance or complete adrenal exhaustion, a ketogenic diet can be beneficial later on down the road. However, it would be wise to get your body back in balance before going forward.

In addition, according to the Diabetes Council, if you are pregnant you should not follow a ketogenic diet. When a woman is pregnant or nursing, it is especially important that she eat a well-rounded diet that includes not only fruits, veggies, proteins, and healthy fats, but also healthy carbs like whole grains.15

The Bottom Line on the Ketogenic Diet for Women

From one woman to another, here is my advice regarding a keto diet: start slow. Cutting carbs too fast may cause the “rebound effect” and put more stress on your body than you can handle. And if you decide to take it easy and cycle your ketosis, keep in mind that introducing too many carbs all at once may produce negative effects as well.

Work with a holistic health practitioner or health coach when trying out a new plan and keep a health journal. Weigh the pros and cons of the path you have chosen and then let common sense and female intuition guide you on what to do next.

Be sure to observe how these dietary changes make you feel every step of the way. And most of all, be forgiving with yourself if you mess up.

Our bodies were created fearfully and wonderfully with the power to heal. Remember, you must take care of your health first, before you can take care of others. So continue to take the time you need to learn what works best for your body. And in no time, you'll be on the way to living your happiest, healthiest life!

With so much information (and MIS-information) floating around out there, it's hard to get a clear picture of what the ketogenic diet actually is.

In an effort to get the facts, we have connected with 2 of the top experts on the ketogenic diet: Dr. Josh Axe and Jordan Rubin, founders of Ancient Nutrition.

We can't wait to share the TRUTH about the ketogenic diet and also give you the details of the “TTAC Keto360 Challenge.”

Join us THIS MONDAY (January 7th) at 5pm EST as we hang out with Josh and Jordan on the inaugural webinar of 2019.

Register HERE for FREE webinar >>

The post Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You? appeared first on The Truth About Cancer.

[battybat-boss]

Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You?

By now you may know a little bit about how a ketogenic diet can be beneficial for fighting cancer, lowering inflammation, and losing weight. But what about our unique health needs as women? It turns out that there are variations of the standard ketogenic diet that may be especially beneficial for us and the health concerns that we face, especially as we get older!

Here's a breakdown of what it is and how it can be helpful for you.

The Ketogenic Diet and Women

Diving into the details of a diet can be just as confusing as that search to find the right one. I know that was the case for me when I first discovered the ketogenic diet. It can seem daunting at first, so I'll start with the basics.

The process of burning fat for energy (instead of glucose) is called “ketosis” (hence the term “ketogenic”). There are amazing mechanisms that kick in with our immune system, metabolism, and detoxification pathways when we move into ketosis.

I don't have to tell you that I have a passion for empowering individuals to treat and beat cancer naturally, so when I learned that following a ketogenic diet could potentially help reverse cancer, I got excited!

Of course, the only constant is change, right? Now that keto has gone mainstream, more research is focusing on how the diet works for specific groups of people. Researchers are discovering that a ketogenic diet can be very effective in healing conditions in addition to cancer, such as diabetes and autoimmune disease.

Experts are also discovering how ketosis works a bit differently depending on gender. One of the primary differences between us ladies and the men is hormones. When our bodies suffer from prolonged stress and poor eating habits, it is often our hormones that bear the brunt of the abuse.

Imbalances in the endocrine system can be the cause of dozens of nasty side effects, all of which can lead to chronic disease.

To get an idea of just how many women are suffering from hormone-related conditions, take a look at these scary statistics:

According to an analysis conducted by John Hopkins University, autoimmune conditions affected roughly eight percent of the U.S. population in 2004. 79% of these cases were women.1

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Kidney Disease, the thyroid autoimmune condition Hashimoto's thyroiditis is about 8 times more common in women than men.2

Women are also up to ten times more likely to get non-autoimmune related hypothyroidism than men.3

According to the American Cancer Society, ovarian cancer is the number one reproductive system cancer for women and uterine cancer is close behind. In addition, one in eight women will receive a breast cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives.4

Women ages 20 to 34 have a higher rate of type 2 diabetes than men because of the changes that occur during pregnancy, which can lead to gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes later in life.5

According to the American Psychological Association, women bear most of the brunt in terms of self-reported feelings of stress. Adrenal fatigue and burnout, which effects hormonal balance, is largely a result of chronic stress.6

The Cyclical Ketogenic Diet: Why It May be Best for Women's Health

As you can see by the heartbreaking statistics above, women have unique challenges when it comes to hormones, stress, and chronic disease. That is why many women respond best to modified versions of the ketogenic diet. One version that is becoming increasingly popular is the Cyclical Ketogenic Diet, or CKD.

In a nutshell, individuals who are on a CKD eat the standard ketogenic diet (roughly 20-30% protein, 5-10% carbohydrates and 60-80% fat) most of the week. One day a week, however, they “carb up.” This means they eat a moderate amount of carbs, even lower amounts of fat, and about the same amount of protein as on ketogenic days.

Both the standard ketogenic diet and the cyclic ketogenic diet are based on the concept of “feast or famine,” but in slightly different ways. During ketosis, your body thinks that it is in “famine mode” all of the time. Because of this, there will always be a subtle amount of stress on the body and on metabolism.

If you are a healthy individual and want to employ the ketogenic diet long-term, some research indicates that you may be able to do this safely.7 If you already have hormone-related issues, a ketogenic diet's anti-inflammatory and mitochondrial-boosting effects can help you as well, but you'll need to monitor how you feel more closely and take it slow. Gradually introducing your body to the CKD can do this.

The CKD allows your body a rest with a feasting day when you eat more carbs. The rest of the week can be spent eating a standard ketogenic diet. I recommend starting out slow by cutting down on your carb load and then pushing the envelope just a little every week until you are in ketosis most of the week.

Another important tip to keep in mind with CKD is that carb-up days are not a license to eat junk. On feasting days, you still don't want to go wild with the pasta and bread! Continue to eat healthy, whole, organic foods and keep the sugary foods out of your diet. I like to make one meal on my feasting day moderately carb-heavy and the other two meals and snacks keto-friendly.

And here is a little hack if you decide to give CKD a try: Slow-carb foods like sweet potatoes and quinoa are great for feasting days. In addition, sprinkle a little apple cider vinegar on your food or drink some with water 15 minutes before eating a meal to help with blood sugar issues. I have done this on many occasions, especially on super busy days when I know I need a boost.

Intermittent Fasting and the CKD

Intermittent fasting (IF) became a big deal after a 2012 study from the University of Hail in Saudi Arabia made headlines. The study found that IF during Ramadan increased immune system cell growth and lowered proinflammatory cytokines in healthy individuals.8 In fact, research on the benefits of IF is now widespread. A 2013 study conducted by Thomas Jefferson University discovered that IF slowed the growth of primary cancer tumors and also decreased the number of new ones in breast cancer patients.9

Many experts also advise periods of intermittent fasting throughout the week on both your ketogenic days and feasting days. Intermittent fasting is gentler on the body than going through a regular fast. And in my opinion, gentler is better for us women, especially if you suffer from hormonal imbalance or high stress levels.

Most people follow the 16/8 rule: they do not eat from roughly 8pm in the evening through 10am the next day. If it is difficult for you to go that long without eating, shoot for a 12 hour fast including sleep time.

Then work your way up to a longer fasting period from there if you can. You can also eat a small amount of fat first thing in the morning or at night. Many folks swear by a coconut oil-infused bulletproof coffee first thing in the morning.

One of many great options you may enjoy in the evening is a relaxing keto version of the popular “golden milk.” This is a yummy beverage made from frothing almond milk together with healing turmeric, a little cinnamon, a dash of black pepper and ginger, and a little coconut oil. I like to put a pinch of stevia in it to give it a sweet zing. Delicious! I also like the fact that at the end of the day, I am getting a little bit of anti-inflammatory turmeric in my system. The turmeric is warming and encourages a good night's sleep.10

The best news is that eating healthy fat during your IF period is not really a cheat. It will not pull you out of ketosis on your ketogenic days and can actually help build robust ketones in the body.

6 Reasons Why a Cyclical Ketogenic Diet May Be for You

Here are some situations where a woman may want to consider going on a cyclic ketogenic diet:

If you have a thyroid imbalance. This could include hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism or Hashimoto's. Introducing ketosis slowly and allowing time for rest through carb-up days keeps the metabolism regulated and conserves thyroid-related metabolic functions.

If you have adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue syndrome is when the adrenal glands are not producing enough hormones to keep up with demand; they never really “turn off.” It is most often caused by chronic stress and can lead to adrenal exhaustion if left unchecked. Staying in ketosis for long periods of time sometimes leads to a reduction in adrenal-related sex hormones and this makes the adrenals work even harder. Taking some time off from ketosis every week allows the adrenals to rest and reset.

If you are going through perimenopause or menopause. Following a CK diet can be beneficial for women going through menopause. Research indicates that aging women as well as men can reap great benefits from the IF aspects of the CKD. Fasting allows for a break from digestion, when the body can focus on repair of all systems, including the reproductive and endocrine systems. Just be sure to watch for energy changes and take a break from IF if your estrogen levels begin to vary too much.11

If you want to lose weight safely (and steadily). When I first did the ketogenic diet, I was amazed at how the weight just seemed to melt off for the first few weeks. Then, to my disappointment, I seemed to hit a plateau. If this happens to you, switching to a cyclic ketogenic diet may kick your metabolism into gear again. Many women also experience success getting off the plateau by choosing a consistent IF schedule, including regular “eating windows”- and then sticking to it! Try different times of day (for example, eating between 10 am to 6 pm first then switching to noon to 8 pm). Eventually you will find the sweet spot where you will start to lose weight again until your body reaches its ideal healthy weight.

You are experiencing some not-so-healthy side effects of the standard keto diet. These could include losing your menstrual cycle altogether, having trouble sleeping, and experiencing brittle nails, among other things. Symptoms may be giving you an indication that you are overstressing our body and may need to switch to the CKD.

If you have type 2 diabetes. Research has proven that eating a ketogenic diet even temporarily can have great healing benefits for most diabetics. This is because type 2 diabetes is caused by too much sugar. The best way to restore insulin sensitivity is to simply stop the heavy sugar load. If you follow the standard keto diet, this takes care of the problem.12

Most experts warn not to jump in to ketosis too fast if you are diabetic. Ease into it gradually by lowering your carb count over a few weeks. It may also be wise to do a shortened version of the CKD by “cycling out” of ketosis every once in a while with a moderately carb-heavy meal. A 2005 study published in the journal Nutrition & Metabolism found that people with type 2 diabetes who were also on the ketogenic diet saw major improvements in insulin sensitivity after just three weeks.13

Type 2 diabetes is an autoimmune condition. Since so many women suffer from some kind of autoimmunity, I would like to say one final word here about these conditions in general. Being on a cyclic ketogenic diet gives you the best of both worlds. You are allowing your body to rest one or more days a week yet lowering inflammation and increasing glutathione levels through ketosis and IF the rest of the week. A 2015 study on individuals with multiple sclerosis found that following a ketogenic diet greatly improved mitochondrial function and increased glutathione levels in the body naturally.14

When Should You Avoid the Ketogenic Diet Completely?

If you are suffering from severe thyroid imbalance or complete adrenal exhaustion, a ketogenic diet can be beneficial later on down the road. However, it would be wise to get your body back in balance before going forward.

In addition, according to the Diabetes Council, if you are pregnant you should not follow a ketogenic diet. When a woman is pregnant or nursing, it is especially important that she eat a well-rounded diet that includes not only fruits, veggies, proteins, and healthy fats, but also healthy carbs like whole grains.15

The Bottom Line on the Ketogenic Diet for Women

From one woman to another, here is my advice regarding a keto diet: start slow. Cutting carbs too fast may cause the “rebound effect” and put more stress on your body than you can handle. And if you decide to take it easy and cycle your ketosis, keep in mind that introducing too many carbs all at once may produce negative effects as well.

Work with a holistic health practitioner or health coach when trying out a new plan and keep a health journal. Weigh the pros and cons of the path you have chosen and then let common sense and female intuition guide you on what to do next.

Be sure to observe how these dietary changes make you feel every step of the way. And most of all, be forgiving with yourself if you mess up.

Our bodies were created fearfully and wonderfully with the power to heal. Remember, you must take care of your health first, before you can take care of others. So continue to take the time you need to learn what works best for your body. And in no time, you'll be on the way to living your happiest, healthiest life!

With so much information (and MIS-information) floating around out there, it's hard to get a clear picture of what the ketogenic diet actually is.

In an effort to get the facts, we have connected with 2 of the top experts on the ketogenic diet: Dr. Josh Axe and Jordan Rubin, founders of Ancient Nutrition.

We can't wait to share the TRUTH about the ketogenic diet and also give you the details of the “TTAC Keto360 Challenge.”

Join us THIS MONDAY (January 7th) at 5pm EST as we hang out with Josh and Jordan on the inaugural webinar of 2019.

Register HERE for FREE webinar >>

The post Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You? appeared first on The Truth About Cancer.

[purrincess-chat]

So I've been meaning to ask for some time now: do you ever sleep? You have so many new ideas going on and constantly updating (btw I'm still waiting for the next chapter of Lady Luck). How on earth do you have time for that?!

Sleep is for the weak  Nah, I’m kidding. I actually sleep quite a lot lol. At least 7 hours or so every night cause I work during the week. I’m fortunately in a time where I can update and write so much if I can just find the energy. When I’m in school I have other things that I have to prioritize over writing when I get home at the end of the day, but I’m not taking any summer classes this semester so when I get home from work at the end of the day, my free time can be whatever I want it to be. I’m on a bit of a creative-high right now, but in some ways I always am, I just don’t have time to devote to it. I come up with new ideas all the time based on people’s fanart, text posts, conversations I have on discord, and other times I just have thoughts that come to me.

Like TTQ. The original idea came to me in the shower randomly one morning (because my writer brain never turns off) and it literally started out as “Ya know, if Chloe’s dad is the mayor, wouldn’t she be kind of on the press’s radar? I wonder what would happen if they found out how awful she is...” and you see what it’s become. Depending on the idea, I may start it immediately like I did with TTQ or I may sit on it for a while like Best Friends Forever and Cat-astrophe which I sat on for almost a year. Usually when I get a new idea, I flesh it out in my brain for a while then as soon as I can I start writing it down. I have a Word document titled “drabble ideas” for stuff like that and then if it’s going to be longer than a couple chapters or when I add more ideas to it, I give it it’s own doc that is usually “___ planning” I also carry around a notebook with me so if I’m out and about I can sit and write it down manually.

It seems like I’ve been going crazy lately with uploading stuff, but I pre-wrote days 1-4 of Think Outside the Love Square, so today I need to work on the next three days. I had also been writing that Ladrien chapter for like a month. It really depends on the story and how long it is. I haven’t started Lady Luck yet, but because they’re short, I can push them off a little. I do it with TTQ (and I also did it with Colors of the Soul) where I would wait until the day I wanted to upload/had time to write, and I literally sit and write the whole chapter in one session. 1000-2000 words only takes me a few hours depending on how many breaks I take and how caught up I get writing clever dialogue. For instance, yesterday, I uploaded 3 things, but I lazed around for most of the day actually. I woke up around 8:30 or so in the morning, checked all of the social medias that I usually do, logged on AO3 and replied to comments, Tumblr, Youtube, Discord, etc then I posted my pre-written piece for Think Outside the Love Square, scrolled around tumblr for a bit, posted the pre-written Ladrien piece, around noon I opened a new Word document and wrote “Chapter 12″ at the top, stared at it for a minute then went back to tumblr and actually closed out of it for a while, and then the rest of my day was more aimless scrolling, eating food, playing games on an off, I took a shower in the afternoon so I wouldn’t have to get up early this morning and do it, I took a two hour nap at one point, then around 8PM I opened up that document again and sat and wrote the whole chapter I posted last night in about an hour and a half or so with breaks every so often. Sometimes it takes me longer, and at one point when I was about halfway through I debated waiting to finish it until today, but then I just so happened to get a second wind and finished it. 

I can do that with short fics because I usually have an idea of what I want to happen in each chapter, so it’s just a matter of bringing it to life. When I plan multi-chapters, I usually plan events that I want to occur in each one, and for short fics like these, I stretch them out into 1000 or so words and call it a day, but for my larger fics like Lady du Coeur where my goal is at least 6000 words a chapter, I have a bit more planned and the overall length (6000-10,000 words) depends on what I had planned. I really don’t know how long a chapter will be until I write it, so sometimes things that I had planned for one chapter get spread into several chapters and other times I’m adding so much extra to make it stretch. 

How do I find time? I dunno. I don’t go out too often. I mean, I do a few times a week with friends, and on the weekends I sometimes do stuff with my family (like today I’m going to my parent’s house for dinner). But most of the time during the week when I get home from work since my roommates moved out, it’s just me so I have all the time in the world until I go to bed I just have to find the motivation and energy to do it. I can’t tell you how I come up with ideas cause I just do. I think writing them down helps me remember them. There are ideas that I have in my drabble doc that I forget about until I go back and look at them again. This week is going to be a little hectic for me, so we’ll see how it goes, but if you look at the calendar I posted (I should reblog that for reference) you’ll see when I have each story planned. The dates on there are my goal, so I’m going to do my best to stick with them. Fingers crossed. This got very long, but I hope it answers your question and wasn’t just me rambling for 20 minutes. :) 

[firstjustgoin]

Waiting for June to Come

Oscar and Rosa are sitting on their couch in the living room where they have spent the majority of the last year, waiting for June to come.

Their living room is a testament to years and decor trends past: the greens and yellows and pinks of flowers covering the wallpaper, thick shag carpeting that has undoubtedly swallowed enough lego pieces and toenail clippings to be the site of a disgusting scavenger hunt for hours, a fat box of a TV that has just four channels. The living room gets the best light, their realtor told them when they were first looking at the house, and she was right: when the dark red velvet curtains weren’t drawn as they were most days, the living room lit up during the golden hour, catching every fleck of dust in the air and illuminating it into a thing of beauty.

Oscar and Rosa have their special chairs. For Oscar, it is a cushy La-Z-Boy recliner that can extend long enough for him to sleep comfortably through the night, a common occurrence these days. For Rosa, it is a dark green wing chair and matching ottoman, which, when you get close enough, you can see is covered in tiny embroidered poodles. Rosa has never sat in Oscar’s La-Z-Boy and Oscar would never dream about sitting in Rosa’s poodle chair and, therefore, they always know what to expect when they enter the room.

Today, as every day, the television is turned on to Channel 2: local news. Despite the fact that they rarely leave the house anymore, they know more than just about anybody else in town about the goingson. They watch the 7am local news, the 8am weather reports, the 9am national reports, 10am local news, the 11am Wheel of Fortune reruns, and the noon Wheel of Fortune reruns (usually by then, Oscar has fallen asleep and Rosa has started her afternoon crossword). In the evening, they watch the 4pm local news, 5pm traffic report, 6pm international news –– ”How sad,” Rosa often sighs when watching the 6pm show, telling herself to stop watching it –– and the 7pm Wheel of Fortune live episode. By 8pm, Rosa is brushing her teeth and heading up to bed while Oscar stays up to watch the 9pm comedy specials, which he will only laugh at if Rosa is not there.

It wasn’t always this way, as it almost never is. Oscar and Rosa used to have jobs to get to, friends to see. Oscar was a head contractor for a big construction business in town, well-known and respected for his attention to detail and easy-to-like demeanor. Rosa volunteered at the local soup kitchen on weekday mornings and bottled up homemade peach and blackberry jams to store in the basement come winter. There’s just one bottle of peach jam left, swallowed by dust and cobwebs in the corner of the storage unit downstairs. Rosa had been saving it for a special occasion, but there haven’t been any of those for awhile.

Once every couple days, Oscar will turn to Rosa and say, “Today?”

Rosa might pause, stand up and walk towards the curtained window and peek behind it, then settle back into her chair and shake her head slowly. “Not today, maybe next week.” And Oscar will turn up the volume dial on the television set a few notches and they will settle back into their lives on opposite poles.

At first, they waited for June the way a puppy awaits his owner’s return to his house after work –– eyes alert and searching, breaths frantic and ragged, wearing themselves out with anxiety. But months have passed and they cannot sustain such energy. They sit in their chairs and they watch news of worlds close and far and they are grateful for the moments when they forget what they are waiting for.

When June was a baby, not more than a couple weeks home from the hospital, Oscar took her on a stroll around the block. It was the first time Rosa could not see her in her periphery and she bit her nails down to blood sitting at the kitchen table waiting for their return. It shocked her, disturbed her, how her mind once sharp and logical had turned to a whirlpool of certain disaster as soon as she gave birth.

She had never fully grasped the concept of dar luz –– the phrase that was tossed around in all of the tattered-covered parenting books she had unearthed from her mother’s attic with handwritten notes scrawling around the edges of the pages: hablar con médico sobre el dolor, temes la ausencia más que el dolor, mes 7: la primera patada. But once she watched her baby disappear through the threshold of the door into a world she could not childproof, she knew that she had truly given light to the world and it was too late to take back. Like light, her baby’s life had momentum but no mass, she could not hold it tightly enough to keep it from one day walking away from her.

After she had devoured her nails, she remembered her mother’s book again and ran back to scour for glimpses into her struggle to let her own daughter disappear into the world, even for a minute. But the handwritten notes dried up on the page right before the chapter titled Mamá después del parto. She could only wonder.

Oscar wheeled June back into the kitchen not twenty minutes after he had left, smiling and whistling the chorus of “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down.” He was so Middle-America sometimes she wanted to laugh and cry and kiss him all at once. Oscar with his affection for meatball sandwiches from delis with women’s names plastered to their signs, “Maria” or “Sofia” or “Viola”; Oscar with his proclivity for taking the winding back roads, already ten minutes late for the dentist, because he swore he saw a yellow-bellied warbler flying through the trees; Oscar who still said, “yes ma’am” to his mother on the phone like a thirteen-year-old boy in trouble. Rosa loved Oscar in the same way she loved her Nancy Drew boxed set growing up –– they both allowed her to pretend she had been swept away by a gust of wind, away from the world she had been told she was going to be mired in for life.

She might have allowed herself to be swept away forever if it hadn’t been for dark-eyed, baby June with a head so soft she thought it would turn to putty. Having a child forced Rosa to look herself in the eyes in the mirror and say at least three times a day, “You don’t get to fuck this one up, Rosa. Not this one.”

She had already come to terms with fucking up Oscar, but not this. “Hey,” she’d say lying in bed next to him, just as he had begun falling into his deep, impenetrable sleeps, “It wouldn’t be the end of the world if we broke up, right?”

Oscar would roll back over to face Rosa, her eyes narrowed and burrowing, “Well, I guess that depends,” he’d say, trying not to look as hurt as he felt, “what your definition is for the ‘end of the world.’ Technically, no, the world wouldn’t end. But my world would feel like it had for awhile.”

She’d shake her head and kiss his nose and he’d stop himself a dozen times for asking the dangerous why and they’d both roll back to their sides of the bed and fall asleep imagining other lives.

They had a baby together: a beautiful baby girl with his fingers and her lip curl and his easy laugh and her silent tears. They both loved their baby but Rosa knew that she loved her baby more than her husband did. He had done nothing but patiently change and re-change her diaper, walk her around in circles when she couldn’t sleep even in the coldest hours of the night, and sing to her songs from his childhood, but still she knew. He could never love June has much as she did and so she bit her nails until they burned and bled as soon as he left the house pushing his daughter in the stroller in front of him.

That was all years ago, back when she had an escape plan written out on the lining of her size seven jeans. She doesn’t have those plans or those jeans anymore. She doesn’t dream about other lives when she does finally succumb to sleep. She dreams in ticker tape headlines crawling across the screen: Local Man Hero After Near-Fatal Train Accident; Five-inch Rain Causes Flooding of Area Parks, Country Roads; Man Still At Large After High-Speed Chase. Her world the size of the peach pits buried in the the backyard.

It has been long enough since June has come that she does not remember the curvature of her daughter’s cheek bones, where the freckles that covered her forearms and knees as a child have faded and where they peek through darkened skin. She cannot recall whether she uses “y’know” like her father or “see?” like her mother. She has forgotten if she eats meat anymore or if she’s become a vegetarian or vegan like the commercials say that you should. She hates herself for forgetting, so she asks Oscar to turn up the sound on the television by a couple of notches and strains to guess the phrases on Wheel of Fortune before the luckier contestants.

[itsiotrecords-blog]

http://ift.tt/2sWzyei

When it comes to our health, we’d be dumb not to take it seriously. There’s a huge industry surrounding health, wellness, and fitness, and we’ve all invested in our health at some point. Some people do that by watching what they eat and keeping to a certain calorie count. Others do it by working out a few times a week and setting goals for themselves that they strive to meet. Still, others go out of their way to adhere to different health tips to jump start their own health. There’s no problem with doing any of these things or all of these things for that matter. However, problems will start to arise when you rely too much on health tips that seem like they work, but actually, don’t do anything to make you healthier. Some of those tips can even harm your health. We decided to take some of the biggest health tips out there that aren’t so healthy and debunk them. Some of these health tips, while not especially helpful, are pretty harmless because they don’t really do anything. However, some of these tips that have been passed down through the generations, sometimes over the course of hundreds of years, are actually quite harmful. The worst part is that a lot of people don’t know, or they’re unwilling to acknowledge it. While most of these tips aren’t “ancient,” they have been around for awhile, and old health tips die hard. Here are fifteen health tips that we should probably leave to history.

#1 Eat Less, Move More While there is some truth to diet and exercise leading to weight loss, this adage is some of the least useful advice you could give someone who’s trying to take charge of their health. While health can depend on your choices, most aspects of health are beyond what we can control. “Eat less, move more” is the advice professionals have been giving for years. This advice doesn’t work though. Yes you have to do those things but telling people to do that in itself is useless. There are strong biological/environmental factors at play working against that very advice. “Having obesity isn’t just some decision that people wake up and decide on,” says Dr. Spencer Nadolsky, a physician that specializes in treating patients with obesity. It’s because of this that just telling people to eat less and move more is actively harmful. Willpower isn’t the answer to weight loss, positive reinforcement is. The people who successfully achieve their health goals do it not because they’re forcing themselves, but because they’re essentially being rewarded by their own health and wellness plan. The best way to take charge of your health is to figure out what works best for you and just do that.

#2 Don’t Eat After 8 PM One major dieting tip that many of us have heard is not to eat after 8PM. Late night snacking, according to people who support this, is the death of any diet. However, those people are wrong. A study published in 2015 in The Journal of Nutrition found that eating healthy food at night led to more muscle mass and strength gains. As long as you pick healthy food to eat at night, you should be totally fine. If you have a health issue like diabetes, you actually have to eat at night in order to stay healthy. You can even lose weight while eating at night, because it’s not about what time you eat, it’s about what you eat. If you’re not trying to lose weight, you can still benefit from eating at night: having a small snack before you go to sleep can actually help you sleep better.

#3 Get Stung On Purpose Because Bee Venom Can Fight HIV Some people have been intentionally getting stung by bees for the health benefits, sometimes in an actual therapeutic setting. Like a lot of different alternative health crazes, this one isn’t really backed up with scientific evidence. However, this hasn’t stopped people from claiming that it cures a ton of different diseases from allergies to psychological evidence to HIV. Seriously, a study found that a component in bee venom could help fight HIV. While this is certainly interesting research, we need to stress that this is preliminary research that could end up getting debunked as scientists explore this further. If someone trying to sell you on bee stings as a health treatment as a treatment for diseases as serious as HIV, know that they’re not nearly as informed about health issues as they think they are.

#4 Smoking Cigarettes Will Keep Your Weight Down Many smokers start smoking or continue the habit because they think it helps keep their weight down. This is actually true: since nicotine was first discovered, people have been using it as an appetite suppressant. Many people who quit smoking find that their weight ends up going up, and that can be really discouraging for those people who are trying to quit cigarettes but appreciated the lower weight that smoking gave them. While this is one of those things that works, this is one of those tips that you absolutely should not be using. While you are suppressing your appetite, making it easier for you to lose weight and potentially keeping it off, you’re also suppressing the health of your lungs and the rest of your body. This is a good example of unhealthy weight loss. Many people believe that all weight loss is actually good, but when you’re using cigarettes to keep your weight down, you’re losing weight at the expense of your short and long term health.

#5 Detoxing The detoxing myth has been pretty pervasive, especially over the last few years. People have been creating detox water recipes for years now, and many people who swear by it have said that it’s the best thing they could have done for their health. Unfortunately, a lot of this seems to be placebo effect. “Let’s be clear,” says Edzard Ernst, emeritus professor of complementary medicine at Exeter University who sat down with the Guardian, “there are two types of detox: one is respectable and the other isn’t.” The respectable one, he says, is the medical treatment of people with life-threatening drug addictions. “The other is the word being hijacked by entrepreneurs, quacks and charlatans to sell a bogus treatment that allegedly detoxifies your body of toxins you’re supposed to have accumulated.” He’s right: if toxins actually built up in a way that our bodies couldn’t get rid of, we’d literally be dead. Detoxing is basically trying to fix something that was never broken in the first place.

#6 Cutting Out Fat To Lose Weight Fat-free foods have been around forever now because many people believe that you can lose weight by simply not eating fat. The truth is actually a bit more complicated than that. It turns out that eating fat helps you lose weight, not the other way around. The key to losing weight isn’t cutting out fat, it’s cutting out food that makes your body store fat. You want to eat food that helps you burn fat instead. Fat-free food tends to have more sugar in it, and if that sugar doesn’t get burned off, it gets stored in your body as fat. Processed carbohydrates are what cause you to gain weight, not the healthy fat that in foods like salmon and avocado. Just make sure you’re eating healthy fats, not unhealthy ones. The more natural healthy fats you eat, the better it is for your health: your blood sugar will stabilize and won’t trigger the insulin high that causes your body to store fat.

#7 The Tapeworm Diet While some diets are all about restricting the food you eat or even maximizing the food you eat, the tapeworm diet is all about the parasites you literally put in your body. While many people do subscribe to this, I hope it goes without saying that this is a very dumb thing to do. Dr. Patricia Quinlisk, the medical director of the Iowa Department of Public Health, wrote a health directive about it last year detailing why this diet is a terrible idea. “Tapeworms will cause you to lose weight because you have this huge worm in your intestines eating your food,” Quinlisk said. That goes without saying, but the effects are even worse. “Ingesting tapeworms is extremely risky and can cause a wide range of undesirable side effects, including rare deaths,” Quinlisk wrote in an email statement, according to the Des Moines Register. “Those desiring to lose weight are advised to stick with proven weight loss methods — consuming fewer calories and increasing physical activity.” Having a tapeworm in your body, aside from being extraordinarily painful, can cause human cysticercosis, which can cause eye damage and get spread very easily.

#8 You Need To Feel The Burn When You Workout Many people believe that the best thing to do during your workouts is to make sure you feel the burn afterward. You want your workout to hurt, or else you didn’t work hard enough, right? Wrong. Sure, you want to push yourself as far as your body can go to see the best results, but if you’re leaving the gym feeling terrible, sore and wrung out, that’s not the best results at all. This idea has already been debunked by doctors and experts, but this idea is still hanging around because we as people tend to conflate pain with success. If something is hard, then it’s worth doing, isn’t it? It’s not, and if you’re feeling real pain when you work out, you should stop and reconsider your workout plan. Your workouts should totally be challenging, but if they really hurt, it’s just going to discourage you from actually doing them and keep you out of the gym, which simply defeats the purpose.

#9 The Sleeping Beauty Diet The Sleeping Beauty diet is one that literally involves getting sedated to lose weight. Either you take pills to sleep, or you force yourself to sleep whenever you’re feeling hungry. Not only does sleeping a lot, let alone several days straight not help you get any thinner, using pills to sleep that much could cause you to get hooked on the very addicting sleeping pills. Sure, you can wake up a few pounds thinner from sleeping that much, but if you use chemicals to help you stay asleep and end up using too many, you might not wake up at all. Even if the pills didn’t cause health issues, sleeping too much can lead to diabetes, heart disease and an increased risk of death. It could even lead to weight gain, which is the opposite of the goal you’re trying to accomplish with this. Basically, this just leads to more harm than good.

#10 Over-Reliance On Essential Oils The essential oil craze has been everywhere these days. Essential oils are basically concentrated extracts from different plants that are known to have health benefits. While essential oils can be beneficial, they can be downright harmful if you use them wrong. Using undiluted essential oils on your skin can actually cause dermatitis, and that effect is even worse if you ingest the oils the way big essential oil companies want you to. The issue with essential oils is not their efficacy, though. Some oils have been proven to have beneficial effects, like tea tree oils and lavender. The problem is when essential oils are said to do a lot more than they actually do. For example, doTERRA and Young Living, two huge essential oil peddlers, have made the claim that their oils can treat ebola. Yes, that ebola. Essential oils work, but we need to be realistic about it and look at the evidence to show what exactly they can be used for.

#11 Putting Things In Your V– One very strange health trend that’s been circulating around is the idea of the stone yoni egg. Yoni eggs are heavy stones, often made out of jade or quartz, that are put in your vagina to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles. Basically, you insert the egg like you would a tampon, and then use your muscles to hold it in as you go about your day. If you’re a man, you might think that that seems easy, but any woman knows that holding a heavy stone egg with your pelvic floor muscles isn’t all that easy. There’s even a device called Elvie that basically combines the yoni egg idea with the mechanics behind the Fitbit. While the Elvie has been tested and many women have found that it actually helps their pelvic floor muscles, inserting big crystals into your vagina is a monumentally bad idea. Jade is porous, so leaving the stone in your vagina while you sleep can actually allow for bacteria to develop in there, which is not what you want because that can cause toxic shock syndrome, the thing women can get if they leave their tampons in for too long. This tip was popularized by Gwyneth Paltrow, the woman behind other crazy tips like “vagina steaming.” To add insult to injury, these jade eggs are really expensive. If you’re looking to strengthen your pelvic floor, either get a device like the Elvie and use it as directed or just do Kegel exercises, which are good for both men and women.

#12 Bundling Up From The Cold To Avoid Getting Sick One piece of advice we always heard as kids is that we need to bundle up when it gets really cold out to avoid getting sick. While bundling up to shield ourselves from the cold is a good thing because it keeps us warm and comfortable in tough winters, it doesn’t really shield you from illnesses like the common cold. Basic science tells us that cold doesn’t cause illness, germs do, and germs can’t really be stopped by winter clothes. What the cold actually does is make it really hard for your body to bounce back once you’re already sick. Lower temperatures make it harder for your body’s immune system to kick in. It’s still good to bundle up during the winter anyway because it’s good to not be exposed to the cold and the potential complications of that, but the benefits have nothing to do with warding off illness.

#13 Drink Apple Cider Vinegar To Cut Sugar Cravings (And Cure Cancer?) One health tip that’s been circulating around recently is drinking apple cider vinegar with every meal. There’s a weird cult-like following around this because of the potential benefits involved: drinking apple cider vinegar is said to have a ton of fiber and nutrients and has the potential to everything from curing sugar cravings to cancer. While there are studies that back up the benefits of apple cider vinegar, by no means should you be drinking this stuff undiluted every day. Drinking it on an empty stomach can make you feel nauseous, but drinking it after a meal negates that, acting as an appetite suppressant so you don’t overeat. On top of that, drinking it undiluted can actually burn your esophagus, kind of like the way vodka burns your throat without the pleasant buzz that comes afterwards. If you plan on trying this out, mix a tablespoon of vinegar with 8 oz of water, and drink it with a straw so you don’t taste feet, which is kind of what apple cider vinegar tastes like. Ultimately, apple cider vinegar is great for some things (like your hair, for example), but drinking it is overrated.

#14 The Grapefruit Diet The grapefruit diet has been a big deal because of the claim that you can lose ten pounds in ten days on it. You don’t eat just grapefruit for ten days thankfully, but you do have to eat or drink a lot of it, accompanied with high protein and low carbs. While grapefruit does cause you to lose weight, this diet’s effects aren’t nearly as pronounced as celebrities say. A research study was done to see how grapefruit affects weight loss, and they found that while the people eating lots of grapefruits had lower blood pressure and cholesterol because of their restricted diet, they didn’t lose more weight than the control group. Grapefruit is great for you because it contains a ton of vitamin C and an antioxidant called lycopene that fights free radicals and helps prevent cancer, and it should definitely be a part of your diet. However, the effects of the grapefruit diet are highly exaggerated, and it’s just not practical to do this.

#15 The Cabbage Soup Diet The cabbage soup diet has been around for a long time, and a lot of people have sworn that it works. Unfortunately, this diet plan isn’t just terrible and ineffective, it’s boring. Sure, you’d lose weight on this diet, but you wouldn’t be doing it because of the cabbage soup, you’d be doing it because you’re literally starving. Eating mostly cabbage soup for a week robs your body of nutrients that aren’t in the soup. What’s really dangerous about this is that people are still going out of their way to say this works. Some people are even writing books about it, claiming erroneously that the diet is prescribed for heart patients when that’s not actually the case. That claim is even more laughable once you realize that cabbage soup is very low in protein and very high in salt, which isn’t a great mix for those trying to lose weight in a healthy, effective way. A good rule of thumb to go by when it comes to choosing a diet is to not pick something that makes you rely on one kind of food only.

Source: TheRichest

[worldpackingcanuck]

Colorful and full of life, the city of Salento is the perfect backpacker retreat for those looking to get away from the hustling and bustling of big cities like Medellin or Bogotá.

Salento is situated amidst the Eje Cafetero (coffee region) of Colombia. Its colorful streets and laid back attitude are only the beginning. The numerous coffee farms in the area and the hiking opportunities provided by the Cocora Valley make Salento a mandatory stop for anyone really wanting to see the real Colombia.

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Back in the day, the route between Cali and Bogotá used to pass by Salento, but this is no longer the case, and this in turn caused for Salento to not develop as quickly as neighboring cities in the region. Stepping into Salento is like stepping back in time. Somewhat “underdeveloped”, what Salento lacks in modern technology it more than makes up in charm.

Sometimes it pays off to wake up early to snap shots….not one soul in sight.

Getting In

Coming from the sleepy town of Tierradentro which had no internet, I had to pretty much guess how to get into Salento. Once at the Popayán bus station, I found out that the only ways to get into Salento are through:

Armenia (if coming from the south): which has buses running every 30 minutes up until 8PM

Pereira (if coming from the north): which has buses running every hour and a half to two hours up until 6:30PM

A Day in Salento

Salento is small…very small. I’m talking about 10 blocks X 9 blocks guys! But that doesn’t mean that there is not much to do inside the city.

The colorful streets are a photographer’s delight! I must have spent countless hours going around streets looking for that perfect shot! I still consider myself a beginner but the setting did help me get these beauts :)

Calle Real

This one street is what could be considered the main artery of Salento. Starting in the main plaza, Calle Real bursts countless bars, restaurants and souvenir shops which share the street with colorful houses to make one vibrant and lively “calle”.

Mirador(es)

Towards the end of Calle Real go up the numerous stairs (I lost count) to get to the Mirador Alto de la Cruz for a bird’s-eye view of Salento’s rooftops and its main artery.

Walk left and follow the path towards the Mirador del Cocora for an amazing view of the Cocora Valley.

Mirador Alto de la Cruz

Mirador del Cocora

View of Cocora Valley

Cocora Valley

Home to Colombia’s national symbol, the Colombian Wax Palm, the Cocora Valley is an excellent place to get your hiking fix. Less strenuous than its southern counterparts, the Cocora Valley hike is quite easy but yet filled with beautiful sceneries including lakes and bridges hanging by metal threads.

The wax palm trees, or giant-ass-trees like I called them, are well….enormous. Like a scene from a Jurassic Park movie, these trees are both eerie and magical at the same time, specially when seen through the clouds.

If walking is not your thing, horse rides are also available. These can be booked in town (there are people offering them, actually yelling “paseo a caballoooo!!!”), or at the entrance of the valley.

To get to the valley head to Salento’s main plaza where the jeeps are parked (in front BanColombia and the supermercado). The first jeep leaves at 7:30AM or as soon as it gets filled with 8 people, for a cost of about 4200 COP. Other jeeps also leave every couple of minutes all depending on whether there are enough passengers to fill them or not.

Go See a Coffee Plantation Farm

There are SEVERAL of these, all within a few kilometers from Salento. From Calle 5, cross the yellow bridge and keep walking…all fincas are on that road.

The road to the fincas is a little hike in itself, as some farms are about a 1 hour walking distance from the city. Downhill to go, uphill to come back.

I went to Finca Don Elias, a small organic coffee farm which does not use any chemicals or pesticides. We were shown the coffee plantations and the different methods to grow and preserve coffee, as well as how coffee is made, from the beans to the cup.

A bit of knowledge…did you know that coarse coffee is NOT stronger than mild coffee??? I know right??? It seems that coarse coffee only smells stronger due to the coffee beans spending more time on the fire, but that this process actually burns the caffeine off them. Mild coffee seems to be the one to drink if you want a good dose of caffeine. Expresso lovers??? They’re getting screwed!!!

This has turned my professional live upside down, no wonder I wasn’t productive in my old 9-to-5 ;)

Visit Filandia

Smaller than Salento, the sleepy town of Filandia is definitely deservant of a day trip. Filandia looks and feels like Salento but on a smaller scale. The main plaza is charming, surrounded by coffee shops and restaurants. Prices are lower than those in Salento which makes it an affordable day trip.

The town has 2 “miradores” (viewpoints), the Mirador de los Angeles which is at the end of Calle 7, and the better known La Colina Iluminada viewpoint. To get to the second “mirador”, follow Carrera 4 as if walking towards the cemetery (the viewpoint is right in front).

To get to Filandia from Salento, take the bus going to Armenia and ask the driver to drop you off at Las Flores (the stop is called this way as there is a flower shop on the road). Cross the highway towards the flower shop and wait for the bus that goes to Filandia (directions are on the front window of the bus).

Overstay Your Welcome

When I came into Salento, I only had the intention of staying for 4 days…it has now been 8 days with no end in sight. Salento is really what I, and many other travellers, have needed to recharge our batteries.

But that doesn’t mean we stay in, there are still plenty of activities to do within the city:

Play Tejo: The game consists of throwing a puck made out of metal or stone onto a board covered with clay. In the center of the clay there is a ring, and on top of the ring there are small cubes with gunpowder. The weight of the puck and the friction it causes on the metal ring makes the gunpowder explode. There is a point system to this game, so find yourself a partner to play with.

Air-gun shooting: Specially on weekends, it is not strange to see these guys in the middle of the road advertising air-gun dart shooting. The bulls-eye consists of many prices, from cookies to chocolates to price money.

Visit Bar Danubio: This little bar fills with locals during the day. Try your hand at a game of pool, or sit down for a cup of coffee or a beer while chitchatting with locals.

I have fallen in love with Salento, and I might never leave!!! The laid back attitude of this city combined with its beautiful corners have made this my favorite Colombian city so far. Have you ever visited a place which you found so hard to leave? Leave it in the comments :)

Why Salento Is A Must-See in Colombia Colorful and full of life, the city of Salento is the perfect backpacker retreat for those looking to get away from the hustling and bustling of big cities like Medellin or Bogotá.

[viralhottopics]

9 tips on productivity from the leaders of billion-dollar companies

Image: Shutterstock

For many of us, productivity is a mystery. Were surrounded by a constant stream of all things busy. And while we start each day with the best of intentions, its painful to look back and have to ask, So what exactly did I get done?

Naturally, productivity tips abound, from life hacks to workflows to apps. Ironically, this flood of information especially if you try to drink it all in often makes us more overloaded and less productive.

So what if you could peak inside the productivity habits of leaders responsible for guiding billion-dollar companies? What would you find?

From planning and scheduling to managing emails right down to disconnecting, herere nine tips proven to put productivity at a premium.

1. Give each day a theme

During a Techonomy conference in 2012, the CEO of Square, Jack Dorsey (also chairman at Twitter) revealed how he stayed on top of all his tasks while managing two companies. One of the ideas he shared was giving each day its own theme. Sadly, none of his suggestions included dress like a pirate day.

Instead, each day was batched by interrelated tasks: Monday for administration and management, Tuesday for products, marketing on Wednesdays, etc. This approach dramatically reduces task switching costs, the cognitive strain that occurs when we move between different types of work. More themes. More results.

2. Get technology out of the way

Not surprisingly, Mary McDowell a former executive at Nokia and now CEO of Polycom, Inc. is a fan of high-tech gadgets. Her love, however, extends far beyond smartphones, scheduling apps, and digital to-do lists. You cant automate human interaction (nor would you want to), McDowell told me, but you can come pretty close to automating the communication experience.

Video meetings that start with a push of a button and cameras that automagically focus on the active speaker are just a couple of hacks she depends on. After all, as soon as you notice the tech youre using, its productivity plummets.

3. Make room for curiosity

When AOL founder Steve Case was asked by Foundr Magazine, which reaches one million monthly readers across their platform, What sets you apart from others? his response was surprising: I think the word curious was part of it. Ive always been curious about whats happening, paying attention to the periphery, and trying to lean into the future. In a world dominated by the tyranny of the urgent, carving out time to just explore and discover is tough. And yet curiosity lies at the heart of innovation, and innovation at the heart of productivity.

4. Put email on delay

Sometimes slacking off pays off. On this front, Tony Hsieh CEO of Zappos takes a unique approach to managing his email, which he calls Yesterbox. Since he gets around 2,000 emails per day, he just lets them slide: If it can wait 48 hours without causing harm, then you are not allowed to respond to any emails that come in today, even if its a simple one-word reply. This way, he tackles yesterdays emails today, and todays emails will be dealt with tomorrow.

5. Plan your day a year in advance

Most of us plan out our schedules a week or month in advance. If you really want to be productive, try outlining your schedule a year ahead of time. If this sounds like odd advice, thats exactly what Nissan CEO Carlos Ghosn does.

To stay on top of three companies Nissan, Renault, and Mitsubishi Motors Ghosn explains: I know exactly where Im going to be, what Im going to be doing for the next 15 months. Its not only for me, its mainly for the people working for me. They know when Im going to be in Tokyo, when Im going to be in Paris, when Im going to be in New York, so they can organize themselves.

6. Limit your time at the desk

One counter-intuitive way to stay productive is to give yourself more time away from the place you work most. Considering that average person in an office job spends 9.3 hours sitting each day, this isnt just a matter productivity, but health.

Google CEO Larry Page limits his exposure to the PC as much as possible, choosing instead to work from his mobile device. Moreover, he also encourages his team to do the same. In an interview with Fortune, he said that spending at least one day per week working only on mobile devices is part of Googles effort to maintain the focus on mobile and to keep pushing his team ahead.

7. Shut it down

Similar to Larry Pages advice on getting away during work, its even more important to disconnect afterhours. In fact, one of the keys to staying productive is knowing when to put the work away.

Current AOL CEO Tim Armstrong regularly gets home from the office late in the evening. But when he does, he calls it quits completely. After 8pm, hes ruthlessly devoted to family time. His favorite shut it down activity? Reading to his daughters each and every night.

8. Mix color and science

Leaders live by data because real numbers are the only way to ensure productivity in a host of business critical areas. The trouble is: raw numbers are hard to bring to life. VMWare CEO Patrick Gelsinger has a colorful solution. He color-codes every time block in his daily schedule.

For example, meetings with partners are purple, strategy meetings are yellow. He then works with interns to tally his schedule and evaluate how his personalized, productivity rainbow stacks up against studies on time management.

9. Automate everything you can

Automating everything may not be 100% possible, but Shrad Rao, CEO of Wagepoint, recommends that business owners maximize their productivity by automating as much as possible.

Rao built his payroll automation service, which aims to make processing payroll as simple as possible for small businesses, around this philosophy. Focus and time are rare commodities, Rao argues. Automating everything you can frees up your energy to be spent on the deep work that only you can do. Whether through bots or outsourcing daily task, if you dont need to be the one to do it dont.

Aaron Orendorff is the founder of iconiContent and a regular contributor at Entrepreneur, Lifehacker, Fast Company, Business Insider and more. Connect with him about content marketing (and bunnies) on Facebook or Twitter.

Read more: http://ift.tt/2kVzQwS

from 9 tips on productivity from the leaders of billion-dollar companies

[battybat-boss]

Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You?

By now you may know a little bit about how a ketogenic diet can be beneficial for fighting cancer, lowering inflammation, and losing weight. But what about our unique health needs as women? It turns out that there are variations of the standard ketogenic diet that may be especially beneficial for us and the health concerns that we face, especially as we get older!

Here's a breakdown of what it is and how it can be helpful for you.

The Ketogenic Diet and Women

Diving into the details of a diet can be just as confusing as that search to find the right one. I know that was the case for me when I first discovered the ketogenic diet. It can seem daunting at first, so I'll start with the basics.

The process of burning fat for energy (instead of glucose) is called “ketosis” (hence the term “ketogenic”). There are amazing mechanisms that kick in with our immune system, metabolism, and detoxification pathways when we move into ketosis.

I don't have to tell you that I have a passion for empowering individuals to treat and beat cancer naturally, so when I learned that following a ketogenic diet could potentially help reverse cancer, I got excited!

Of course, the only constant is change, right? Now that keto has gone mainstream, more research is focusing on how the diet works for specific groups of people. Researchers are discovering that a ketogenic diet can be very effective in healing conditions in addition to cancer, such as diabetes and autoimmune disease.

Experts are also discovering how ketosis works a bit differently depending on gender. One of the primary differences between us ladies and the men is hormones. When our bodies suffer from prolonged stress and poor eating habits, it is often our hormones that bear the brunt of the abuse.

Imbalances in the endocrine system can be the cause of dozens of nasty side effects, all of which can lead to chronic disease.

To get an idea of just how many women are suffering from hormone-related conditions, take a look at these scary statistics:

According to an analysis conducted by John Hopkins University, autoimmune conditions affected roughly eight percent of the U.S. population in 2004. 79% of these cases were women.1

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Kidney Disease, the thyroid autoimmune condition Hashimoto's thyroiditis is about 8 times more common in women than men.2

Women are also up to ten times more likely to get non-autoimmune related hypothyroidism than men.3

According to the American Cancer Society, ovarian cancer is the number one reproductive system cancer for women and uterine cancer is close behind. In addition, one in eight women will receive a breast cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives.4

Women ages 20 to 34 have a higher rate of type 2 diabetes than men because of the changes that occur during pregnancy, which can lead to gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes later in life.5

According to the American Psychological Association, women bear most of the brunt in terms of self-reported feelings of stress. Adrenal fatigue and burnout, which effects hormonal balance, is largely a result of chronic stress.6

The Cyclical Ketogenic Diet: Why It May be Best for Women's Health

As you can see by the heartbreaking statistics above, women have unique challenges when it comes to hormones, stress, and chronic disease. That is why many women respond best to modified versions of the ketogenic diet. One version that is becoming increasingly popular is the Cyclical Ketogenic Diet, or CKD.

In a nutshell, individuals who are on a CKD eat the standard ketogenic diet (roughly 20-30% protein, 5-10% carbohydrates and 60-80% fat) most of the week. One day a week, however, they “carb up.” This means they eat a moderate amount of carbs, even lower amounts of fat, and about the same amount of protein as on ketogenic days.

Both the standard ketogenic diet and the cyclic ketogenic diet are based on the concept of “feast or famine,” but in slightly different ways. During ketosis, your body thinks that it is in “famine mode” all of the time. Because of this, there will always be a subtle amount of stress on the body and on metabolism.

If you are a healthy individual and want to employ the ketogenic diet long-term, some research indicates that you may be able to do this safely.7 If you already have hormone-related issues, a ketogenic diet's anti-inflammatory and mitochondrial-boosting effects can help you as well, but you'll need to monitor how you feel more closely and take it slow. Gradually introducing your body to the CKD can do this.

The CKD allows your body a rest with a feasting day when you eat more carbs. The rest of the week can be spent eating a standard ketogenic diet. I recommend starting out slow by cutting down on your carb load and then pushing the envelope just a little every week until you are in ketosis most of the week.

Another important tip to keep in mind with CKD is that carb-up days are not a license to eat junk. On feasting days, you still don't want to go wild with the pasta and bread! Continue to eat healthy, whole, organic foods and keep the sugary foods out of your diet. I like to make one meal on my feasting day moderately carb-heavy and the other two meals and snacks keto-friendly.

And here is a little hack if you decide to give CKD a try: Slow-carb foods like sweet potatoes and quinoa are great for feasting days. In addition, sprinkle a little apple cider vinegar on your food or drink some with water 15 minutes before eating a meal to help with blood sugar issues. I have done this on many occasions, especially on super busy days when I know I need a boost.

Intermittent Fasting and the CKD

Intermittent fasting (IF) became a big deal after a 2012 study from the University of Hail in Saudi Arabia made headlines. The study found that IF during Ramadan increased immune system cell growth and lowered proinflammatory cytokines in healthy individuals.8 In fact, research on the benefits of IF is now widespread. A 2013 study conducted by Thomas Jefferson University discovered that IF slowed the growth of primary cancer tumors and also decreased the number of new ones in breast cancer patients.9

Many experts also advise periods of intermittent fasting throughout the week on both your ketogenic days and feasting days. Intermittent fasting is gentler on the body than going through a regular fast. And in my opinion, gentler is better for us women, especially if you suffer from hormonal imbalance or high stress levels.

Most people follow the 16/8 rule: they do not eat from roughly 8pm in the evening through 10am the next day. If it is difficult for you to go that long without eating, shoot for a 12 hour fast including sleep time.

Then work your way up to a longer fasting period from there if you can. You can also eat a small amount of fat first thing in the morning or at night. Many folks swear by a coconut oil-infused bulletproof coffee first thing in the morning.

One of many great options you may enjoy in the evening is a relaxing keto version of the popular “golden milk.” This is a yummy beverage made from frothing almond milk together with healing turmeric, a little cinnamon, a dash of black pepper and ginger, and a little coconut oil. I like to put a pinch of stevia in it to give it a sweet zing. Delicious! I also like the fact that at the end of the day, I am getting a little bit of anti-inflammatory turmeric in my system. The turmeric is warming and encourages a good night's sleep.10

The best news is that eating healthy fat during your IF period is not really a cheat. It will not pull you out of ketosis on your ketogenic days and can actually help build robust ketones in the body.

6 Reasons Why a Cyclical Ketogenic Diet May Be for You

Here are some situations where a woman may want to consider going on a cyclic ketogenic diet:

If you have a thyroid imbalance. This could include hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism or Hashimoto's. Introducing ketosis slowly and allowing time for rest through carb-up days keeps the metabolism regulated and conserves thyroid-related metabolic functions.

If you have adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue syndrome is when the adrenal glands are not producing enough hormones to keep up with demand; they never really “turn off.” It is most often caused by chronic stress and can lead to adrenal exhaustion if left unchecked. Staying in ketosis for long periods of time sometimes leads to a reduction in adrenal-related sex hormones and this makes the adrenals work even harder. Taking some time off from ketosis every week allows the adrenals to rest and reset.

If you are going through perimenopause or menopause. Following a CK diet can be beneficial for women going through menopause. Research indicates that aging women as well as men can reap great benefits from the IF aspects of the CKD. Fasting allows for a break from digestion, when the body can focus on repair of all systems, including the reproductive and endocrine systems. Just be sure to watch for energy changes and take a break from IF if your estrogen levels begin to vary too much.11

If you want to lose weight safely (and steadily). When I first did the ketogenic diet, I was amazed at how the weight just seemed to melt off for the first few weeks. Then, to my disappointment, I seemed to hit a plateau. If this happens to you, switching to a cyclic ketogenic diet may kick your metabolism into gear again. Many women also experience success getting off the plateau by choosing a consistent IF schedule, including regular “eating windows”- and then sticking to it! Try different times of day (for example, eating between 10 am to 6 pm first then switching to noon to 8 pm). Eventually you will find the sweet spot where you will start to lose weight again until your body reaches its ideal healthy weight.

You are experiencing some not-so-healthy side effects of the standard keto diet. These could include losing your menstrual cycle altogether, having trouble sleeping, and experiencing brittle nails, among other things. Symptoms may be giving you an indication that you are overstressing our body and may need to switch to the CKD.

If you have type 2 diabetes. Research has proven that eating a ketogenic diet even temporarily can have great healing benefits for most diabetics. This is because type 2 diabetes is caused by too much sugar. The best way to restore insulin sensitivity is to simply stop the heavy sugar load. If you follow the standard keto diet, this takes care of the problem.12

Most experts warn not to jump in to ketosis too fast if you are diabetic. Ease into it gradually by lowering your carb count over a few weeks. It may also be wise to do a shortened version of the CKD by “cycling out” of ketosis every once in a while with a moderately carb-heavy meal. A 2005 study published in the journal Nutrition & Metabolism found that people with type 2 diabetes who were also on the ketogenic diet saw major improvements in insulin sensitivity after just three weeks.13

Type 2 diabetes is an autoimmune condition. Since so many women suffer from some kind of autoimmunity, I would like to say one final word here about these conditions in general. Being on a cyclic ketogenic diet gives you the best of both worlds. You are allowing your body to rest one or more days a week yet lowering inflammation and increasing glutathione levels through ketosis and IF the rest of the week. A 2015 study on individuals with multiple sclerosis found that following a ketogenic diet greatly improved mitochondrial function and increased glutathione levels in the body naturally.14

When Should You Avoid the Ketogenic Diet Completely?

If you are suffering from severe thyroid imbalance or complete adrenal exhaustion, a ketogenic diet can be beneficial later on down the road. However, it would be wise to get your body back in balance before going forward.

In addition, according to the Diabetes Council, if you are pregnant you should not follow a ketogenic diet. When a woman is pregnant or nursing, it is especially important that she eat a well-rounded diet that includes not only fruits, veggies, proteins, and healthy fats, but also healthy carbs like whole grains.15

The Bottom Line on the Ketogenic Diet for Women

From one woman to another, here is my advice regarding a keto diet: start slow. Cutting carbs too fast may cause the “rebound effect” and put more stress on your body than you can handle. And if you decide to take it easy and cycle your ketosis, keep in mind that introducing too many carbs all at once may produce negative effects as well.

Work with a holistic health practitioner or health coach when trying out a new plan and keep a health journal. Weigh the pros and cons of the path you have chosen and then let common sense and female intuition guide you on what to do next.

Be sure to observe how these dietary changes make you feel every step of the way. And most of all, be forgiving with yourself if you mess up.

Our bodies were created fearfully and wonderfully with the power to heal. Remember, you must take care of your health first, before you can take care of others. So continue to take the time you need to learn what works best for your body. And in no time, you'll be on the way to living your happiest, healthiest life!

With so much information (and MIS-information) floating around out there, it's hard to get a clear picture of what the ketogenic diet actually is.

In an effort to get the facts, we have connected with 2 of the top experts on the ketogenic diet: Dr. Josh Axe and Jordan Rubin, founders of Ancient Nutrition.

We can't wait to share the TRUTH about the ketogenic diet and also give you the details of the “TTAC Keto360 Challenge.”

Join us THIS MONDAY (January 7th) at 5pm EST as we hang out with Josh and Jordan on the inaugural webinar of 2019.

Register HERE for FREE webinar >>

The post Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You? appeared first on The Truth About Cancer.

[battybat-boss]

Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You?

By now you may know a little bit about how a ketogenic diet can be beneficial for fighting cancer, lowering inflammation, and losing weight. But what about our unique health needs as women? It turns out that there are variations of the standard ketogenic diet that may be especially beneficial for us and the health concerns that we face, especially as we get older!

Here's a breakdown of what it is and how it can be helpful for you.

The Ketogenic Diet and Women

Diving into the details of a diet can be just as confusing as that search to find the right one. I know that was the case for me when I first discovered the ketogenic diet. It can seem daunting at first, so I'll start with the basics.

The process of burning fat for energy (instead of glucose) is called “ketosis” (hence the term “ketogenic”). There are amazing mechanisms that kick in with our immune system, metabolism, and detoxification pathways when we move into ketosis.

I don't have to tell you that I have a passion for empowering individuals to treat and beat cancer naturally, so when I learned that following a ketogenic diet could potentially help reverse cancer, I got excited!

Of course, the only constant is change, right? Now that keto has gone mainstream, more research is focusing on how the diet works for specific groups of people. Researchers are discovering that a ketogenic diet can be very effective in healing conditions in addition to cancer, such as diabetes and autoimmune disease.

Experts are also discovering how ketosis works a bit differently depending on gender. One of the primary differences between us ladies and the men is hormones. When our bodies suffer from prolonged stress and poor eating habits, it is often our hormones that bear the brunt of the abuse.

Imbalances in the endocrine system can be the cause of dozens of nasty side effects, all of which can lead to chronic disease.

To get an idea of just how many women are suffering from hormone-related conditions, take a look at these scary statistics:

According to an analysis conducted by John Hopkins University, autoimmune conditions affected roughly eight percent of the U.S. population in 2004. 79% of these cases were women.1

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Kidney Disease, the thyroid autoimmune condition Hashimoto's thyroiditis is about 8 times more common in women than men.2

Women are also up to ten times more likely to get non-autoimmune related hypothyroidism than men.3

According to the American Cancer Society, ovarian cancer is the number one reproductive system cancer for women and uterine cancer is close behind. In addition, one in eight women will receive a breast cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives.4

Women ages 20 to 34 have a higher rate of type 2 diabetes than men because of the changes that occur during pregnancy, which can lead to gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes later in life.5

According to the American Psychological Association, women bear most of the brunt in terms of self-reported feelings of stress. Adrenal fatigue and burnout, which effects hormonal balance, is largely a result of chronic stress.6

The Cyclical Ketogenic Diet: Why It May be Best for Women's Health

As you can see by the heartbreaking statistics above, women have unique challenges when it comes to hormones, stress, and chronic disease. That is why many women respond best to modified versions of the ketogenic diet. One version that is becoming increasingly popular is the Cyclical Ketogenic Diet, or CKD.

In a nutshell, individuals who are on a CKD eat the standard ketogenic diet (roughly 20-30% protein, 5-10% carbohydrates and 60-80% fat) most of the week. One day a week, however, they “carb up.” This means they eat a moderate amount of carbs, even lower amounts of fat, and about the same amount of protein as on ketogenic days.

Both the standard ketogenic diet and the cyclic ketogenic diet are based on the concept of “feast or famine,” but in slightly different ways. During ketosis, your body thinks that it is in “famine mode” all of the time. Because of this, there will always be a subtle amount of stress on the body and on metabolism.

If you are a healthy individual and want to employ the ketogenic diet long-term, some research indicates that you may be able to do this safely.7 If you already have hormone-related issues, a ketogenic diet's anti-inflammatory and mitochondrial-boosting effects can help you as well, but you'll need to monitor how you feel more closely and take it slow. Gradually introducing your body to the CKD can do this.

The CKD allows your body a rest with a feasting day when you eat more carbs. The rest of the week can be spent eating a standard ketogenic diet. I recommend starting out slow by cutting down on your carb load and then pushing the envelope just a little every week until you are in ketosis most of the week.

Another important tip to keep in mind with CKD is that carb-up days are not a license to eat junk. On feasting days, you still don't want to go wild with the pasta and bread! Continue to eat healthy, whole, organic foods and keep the sugary foods out of your diet. I like to make one meal on my feasting day moderately carb-heavy and the other two meals and snacks keto-friendly.

And here is a little hack if you decide to give CKD a try: Slow-carb foods like sweet potatoes and quinoa are great for feasting days. In addition, sprinkle a little apple cider vinegar on your food or drink some with water 15 minutes before eating a meal to help with blood sugar issues. I have done this on many occasions, especially on super busy days when I know I need a boost.

Intermittent Fasting and the CKD

Intermittent fasting (IF) became a big deal after a 2012 study from the University of Hail in Saudi Arabia made headlines. The study found that IF during Ramadan increased immune system cell growth and lowered proinflammatory cytokines in healthy individuals.8 In fact, research on the benefits of IF is now widespread. A 2013 study conducted by Thomas Jefferson University discovered that IF slowed the growth of primary cancer tumors and also decreased the number of new ones in breast cancer patients.9

Many experts also advise periods of intermittent fasting throughout the week on both your ketogenic days and feasting days. Intermittent fasting is gentler on the body than going through a regular fast. And in my opinion, gentler is better for us women, especially if you suffer from hormonal imbalance or high stress levels.

Most people follow the 16/8 rule: they do not eat from roughly 8pm in the evening through 10am the next day. If it is difficult for you to go that long without eating, shoot for a 12 hour fast including sleep time.

Then work your way up to a longer fasting period from there if you can. You can also eat a small amount of fat first thing in the morning or at night. Many folks swear by a coconut oil-infused bulletproof coffee first thing in the morning.

One of many great options you may enjoy in the evening is a relaxing keto version of the popular “golden milk.” This is a yummy beverage made from frothing almond milk together with healing turmeric, a little cinnamon, a dash of black pepper and ginger, and a little coconut oil. I like to put a pinch of stevia in it to give it a sweet zing. Delicious! I also like the fact that at the end of the day, I am getting a little bit of anti-inflammatory turmeric in my system. The turmeric is warming and encourages a good night's sleep.10

The best news is that eating healthy fat during your IF period is not really a cheat. It will not pull you out of ketosis on your ketogenic days and can actually help build robust ketones in the body.

6 Reasons Why a Cyclical Ketogenic Diet May Be for You

Here are some situations where a woman may want to consider going on a cyclic ketogenic diet:

If you have a thyroid imbalance. This could include hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism or Hashimoto's. Introducing ketosis slowly and allowing time for rest through carb-up days keeps the metabolism regulated and conserves thyroid-related metabolic functions.

If you have adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue syndrome is when the adrenal glands are not producing enough hormones to keep up with demand; they never really “turn off.” It is most often caused by chronic stress and can lead to adrenal exhaustion if left unchecked. Staying in ketosis for long periods of time sometimes leads to a reduction in adrenal-related sex hormones and this makes the adrenals work even harder. Taking some time off from ketosis every week allows the adrenals to rest and reset.

If you are going through perimenopause or menopause. Following a CK diet can be beneficial for women going through menopause. Research indicates that aging women as well as men can reap great benefits from the IF aspects of the CKD. Fasting allows for a break from digestion, when the body can focus on repair of all systems, including the reproductive and endocrine systems. Just be sure to watch for energy changes and take a break from IF if your estrogen levels begin to vary too much.11

If you want to lose weight safely (and steadily). When I first did the ketogenic diet, I was amazed at how the weight just seemed to melt off for the first few weeks. Then, to my disappointment, I seemed to hit a plateau. If this happens to you, switching to a cyclic ketogenic diet may kick your metabolism into gear again. Many women also experience success getting off the plateau by choosing a consistent IF schedule, including regular “eating windows”- and then sticking to it! Try different times of day (for example, eating between 10 am to 6 pm first then switching to noon to 8 pm). Eventually you will find the sweet spot where you will start to lose weight again until your body reaches its ideal healthy weight.

You are experiencing some not-so-healthy side effects of the standard keto diet. These could include losing your menstrual cycle altogether, having trouble sleeping, and experiencing brittle nails, among other things. Symptoms may be giving you an indication that you are overstressing our body and may need to switch to the CKD.

If you have type 2 diabetes. Research has proven that eating a ketogenic diet even temporarily can have great healing benefits for most diabetics. This is because type 2 diabetes is caused by too much sugar. The best way to restore insulin sensitivity is to simply stop the heavy sugar load. If you follow the standard keto diet, this takes care of the problem.12

Most experts warn not to jump in to ketosis too fast if you are diabetic. Ease into it gradually by lowering your carb count over a few weeks. It may also be wise to do a shortened version of the CKD by “cycling out” of ketosis every once in a while with a moderately carb-heavy meal. A 2005 study published in the journal Nutrition & Metabolism found that people with type 2 diabetes who were also on the ketogenic diet saw major improvements in insulin sensitivity after just three weeks.13

Type 2 diabetes is an autoimmune condition. Since so many women suffer from some kind of autoimmunity, I would like to say one final word here about these conditions in general. Being on a cyclic ketogenic diet gives you the best of both worlds. You are allowing your body to rest one or more days a week yet lowering inflammation and increasing glutathione levels through ketosis and IF the rest of the week. A 2015 study on individuals with multiple sclerosis found that following a ketogenic diet greatly improved mitochondrial function and increased glutathione levels in the body naturally.14

When Should You Avoid the Ketogenic Diet Completely?

If you are suffering from severe thyroid imbalance or complete adrenal exhaustion, a ketogenic diet can be beneficial later on down the road. However, it would be wise to get your body back in balance before going forward.

In addition, according to the Diabetes Council, if you are pregnant you should not follow a ketogenic diet. When a woman is pregnant or nursing, it is especially important that she eat a well-rounded diet that includes not only fruits, veggies, proteins, and healthy fats, but also healthy carbs like whole grains.15

The Bottom Line on the Ketogenic Diet for Women

From one woman to another, here is my advice regarding a keto diet: start slow. Cutting carbs too fast may cause the “rebound effect” and put more stress on your body than you can handle. And if you decide to take it easy and cycle your ketosis, keep in mind that introducing too many carbs all at once may produce negative effects as well.

Work with a holistic health practitioner or health coach when trying out a new plan and keep a health journal. Weigh the pros and cons of the path you have chosen and then let common sense and female intuition guide you on what to do next.

Be sure to observe how these dietary changes make you feel every step of the way. And most of all, be forgiving with yourself if you mess up.

Our bodies were created fearfully and wonderfully with the power to heal. Remember, you must take care of your health first, before you can take care of others. So continue to take the time you need to learn what works best for your body. And in no time, you'll be on the way to living your happiest, healthiest life!

With so much information (and MIS-information) floating around out there, it's hard to get a clear picture of what the ketogenic diet actually is.

In an effort to get the facts, we have connected with 2 of the top experts on the ketogenic diet: Dr. Josh Axe and Jordan Rubin, founders of Ancient Nutrition.

We can't wait to share the TRUTH about the ketogenic diet and also give you the details of the “TTAC Keto360 Challenge.”

Join us THIS MONDAY (January 7th) at 5pm EST as we hang out with Josh and Jordan on the inaugural webinar of 2019.

Register HERE for FREE webinar >>

The post Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You? appeared first on The Truth About Cancer.

[lopezdorothy70-blog]

Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You?

By now you may know a little bit about how a ketogenic diet can be beneficial for fighting cancer, lowering inflammation, and losing weight. But what about our unique health needs as women? It turns out that there are variations of the standard ketogenic diet that may be especially beneficial for us and the health concerns that we face, especially as we get older!

Here's a breakdown of what it is and how it can be helpful for you.

The Ketogenic Diet and Women

Diving into the details of a diet can be just as confusing as that search to find the right one. I know that was the case for me when I first discovered the ketogenic diet. It can seem daunting at first, so I'll start with the basics.

The process of burning fat for energy (instead of glucose) is called “ketosis” (hence the term “ketogenic”). There are amazing mechanisms that kick in with our immune system, metabolism, and detoxification pathways when we move into ketosis.

I don't have to tell you that I have a passion for empowering individuals to treat and beat cancer naturally, so when I learned that following a ketogenic diet could potentially help reverse cancer, I got excited!

Of course, the only constant is change, right? Now that keto has gone mainstream, more research is focusing on how the diet works for specific groups of people. Researchers are discovering that a ketogenic diet can be very effective in healing conditions in addition to cancer, such as diabetes and autoimmune disease.

Experts are also discovering how ketosis works a bit differently depending on gender. One of the primary differences between us ladies and the men is hormones. When our bodies suffer from prolonged stress and poor eating habits, it is often our hormones that bear the brunt of the abuse.

Imbalances in the endocrine system can be the cause of dozens of nasty side effects, all of which can lead to chronic disease.

To get an idea of just how many women are suffering from hormone-related conditions, take a look at these scary statistics:

According to an analysis conducted by John Hopkins University, autoimmune conditions affected roughly eight percent of the U.S. population in 2004. 79% of these cases were women.1

According to the National Institute of Diabetes and Kidney Disease, the thyroid autoimmune condition Hashimoto's thyroiditis is about 8 times more common in women than men.2

Women are also up to ten times more likely to get non-autoimmune related hypothyroidism than men.3

According to the American Cancer Society, ovarian cancer is the number one reproductive system cancer for women and uterine cancer is close behind. In addition, one in eight women will receive a breast cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives.4

Women ages 20 to 34 have a higher rate of type 2 diabetes than men because of the changes that occur during pregnancy, which can lead to gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is a risk factor for developing type 2 diabetes later in life.5

According to the American Psychological Association, women bear most of the brunt in terms of self-reported feelings of stress. Adrenal fatigue and burnout, which effects hormonal balance, is largely a result of chronic stress.6

The Cyclical Ketogenic Diet: Why It May be Best for Women's Health

As you can see by the heartbreaking statistics above, women have unique challenges when it comes to hormones, stress, and chronic disease. That is why many women respond best to modified versions of the ketogenic diet. One version that is becoming increasingly popular is the Cyclical Ketogenic Diet, or CKD.

In a nutshell, individuals who are on a CKD eat the standard ketogenic diet (roughly 20-30% protein, 5-10% carbohydrates and 60-80% fat) most of the week. One day a week, however, they “carb up.” This means they eat a moderate amount of carbs, even lower amounts of fat, and about the same amount of protein as on ketogenic days.

Both the standard ketogenic diet and the cyclic ketogenic diet are based on the concept of “feast or famine,” but in slightly different ways. During ketosis, your body thinks that it is in “famine mode” all of the time. Because of this, there will always be a subtle amount of stress on the body and on metabolism.

If you are a healthy individual and want to employ the ketogenic diet long-term, some research indicates that you may be able to do this safely.7 If you already have hormone-related issues, a ketogenic diet's anti-inflammatory and mitochondrial-boosting effects can help you as well, but you'll need to monitor how you feel more closely and take it slow. Gradually introducing your body to the CKD can do this.

The CKD allows your body a rest with a feasting day when you eat more carbs. The rest of the week can be spent eating a standard ketogenic diet. I recommend starting out slow by cutting down on your carb load and then pushing the envelope just a little every week until you are in ketosis most of the week.

Another important tip to keep in mind with CKD is that carb-up days are not a license to eat junk. On feasting days, you still don't want to go wild with the pasta and bread! Continue to eat healthy, whole, organic foods and keep the sugary foods out of your diet. I like to make one meal on my feasting day moderately carb-heavy and the other two meals and snacks keto-friendly.

And here is a little hack if you decide to give CKD a try: Slow-carb foods like sweet potatoes and quinoa are great for feasting days. In addition, sprinkle a little apple cider vinegar on your food or drink some with water 15 minutes before eating a meal to help with blood sugar issues. I have done this on many occasions, especially on super busy days when I know I need a boost.

Intermittent Fasting and the CKD

Intermittent fasting (IF) became a big deal after a 2012 study from the University of Hail in Saudi Arabia made headlines. The study found that IF during Ramadan increased immune system cell growth and lowered proinflammatory cytokines in healthy individuals.8 In fact, research on the benefits of IF is now widespread. A 2013 study conducted by Thomas Jefferson University discovered that IF slowed the growth of primary cancer tumors and also decreased the number of new ones in breast cancer patients.9

Many experts also advise periods of intermittent fasting throughout the week on both your ketogenic days and feasting days. Intermittent fasting is gentler on the body than going through a regular fast. And in my opinion, gentler is better for us women, especially if you suffer from hormonal imbalance or high stress levels.

Most people follow the 16/8 rule: they do not eat from roughly 8pm in the evening through 10am the next day. If it is difficult for you to go that long without eating, shoot for a 12 hour fast including sleep time.

Then work your way up to a longer fasting period from there if you can. You can also eat a small amount of fat first thing in the morning or at night. Many folks swear by a coconut oil-infused bulletproof coffee first thing in the morning.

One of many great options you may enjoy in the evening is a relaxing keto version of the popular “golden milk.” This is a yummy beverage made from frothing almond milk together with healing turmeric, a little cinnamon, a dash of black pepper and ginger, and a little coconut oil. I like to put a pinch of stevia in it to give it a sweet zing. Delicious! I also like the fact that at the end of the day, I am getting a little bit of anti-inflammatory turmeric in my system. The turmeric is warming and encourages a good night's sleep.10

The best news is that eating healthy fat during your IF period is not really a cheat. It will not pull you out of ketosis on your ketogenic days and can actually help build robust ketones in the body.

6 Reasons Why a Cyclical Ketogenic Diet May Be for You

Here are some situations where a woman may want to consider going on a cyclic ketogenic diet:

If you have a thyroid imbalance. This could include hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism or Hashimoto's. Introducing ketosis slowly and allowing time for rest through carb-up days keeps the metabolism regulated and conserves thyroid-related metabolic functions.

If you have adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue syndrome is when the adrenal glands are not producing enough hormones to keep up with demand; they never really “turn off.” It is most often caused by chronic stress and can lead to adrenal exhaustion if left unchecked. Staying in ketosis for long periods of time sometimes leads to a reduction in adrenal-related sex hormones and this makes the adrenals work even harder. Taking some time off from ketosis every week allows the adrenals to rest and reset.

If you are going through perimenopause or menopause. Following a CK diet can be beneficial for women going through menopause. Research indicates that aging women as well as men can reap great benefits from the IF aspects of the CKD. Fasting allows for a break from digestion, when the body can focus on repair of all systems, including the reproductive and endocrine systems. Just be sure to watch for energy changes and take a break from IF if your estrogen levels begin to vary too much.11

If you want to lose weight safely (and steadily). When I first did the ketogenic diet, I was amazed at how the weight just seemed to melt off for the first few weeks. Then, to my disappointment, I seemed to hit a plateau. If this happens to you, switching to a cyclic ketogenic diet may kick your metabolism into gear again. Many women also experience success getting off the plateau by choosing a consistent IF schedule, including regular “eating windows”- and then sticking to it! Try different times of day (for example, eating between 10 am to 6 pm first then switching to noon to 8 pm). Eventually you will find the sweet spot where you will start to lose weight again until your body reaches its ideal healthy weight.

You are experiencing some not-so-healthy side effects of the standard keto diet. These could include losing your menstrual cycle altogether, having trouble sleeping, and experiencing brittle nails, among other things. Symptoms may be giving you an indication that you are overstressing our body and may need to switch to the CKD.

If you have type 2 diabetes. Research has proven that eating a ketogenic diet even temporarily can have great healing benefits for most diabetics. This is because type 2 diabetes is caused by too much sugar. The best way to restore insulin sensitivity is to simply stop the heavy sugar load. If you follow the standard keto diet, this takes care of the problem.12

Most experts warn not to jump in to ketosis too fast if you are diabetic. Ease into it gradually by lowering your carb count over a few weeks. It may also be wise to do a shortened version of the CKD by “cycling out” of ketosis every once in a while with a moderately carb-heavy meal. A 2005 study published in the journal Nutrition & Metabolism found that people with type 2 diabetes who were also on the ketogenic diet saw major improvements in insulin sensitivity after just three weeks.13

Type 2 diabetes is an autoimmune condition. Since so many women suffer from some kind of autoimmunity, I would like to say one final word here about these conditions in general. Being on a cyclic ketogenic diet gives you the best of both worlds. You are allowing your body to rest one or more days a week yet lowering inflammation and increasing glutathione levels through ketosis and IF the rest of the week. A 2015 study on individuals with multiple sclerosis found that following a ketogenic diet greatly improved mitochondrial function and increased glutathione levels in the body naturally.14

When Should You Avoid the Ketogenic Diet Completely?

If you are suffering from severe thyroid imbalance or complete adrenal exhaustion, a ketogenic diet can be beneficial later on down the road. However, it would be wise to get your body back in balance before going forward.

In addition, according to the Diabetes Council, if you are pregnant you should not follow a ketogenic diet. When a woman is pregnant or nursing, it is especially important that she eat a well-rounded diet that includes not only fruits, veggies, proteins, and healthy fats, but also healthy carbs like whole grains.15

The Bottom Line on the Ketogenic Diet for Women

From one woman to another, here is my advice regarding a keto diet: start slow. Cutting carbs too fast may cause the “rebound effect” and put more stress on your body than you can handle. And if you decide to take it easy and cycle your ketosis, keep in mind that introducing too many carbs all at once may produce negative effects as well.

Work with a holistic health practitioner or health coach when trying out a new plan and keep a health journal. Weigh the pros and cons of the path you have chosen and then let common sense and female intuition guide you on what to do next.

Be sure to observe how these dietary changes make you feel every step of the way. And most of all, be forgiving with yourself if you mess up.

Our bodies were created fearfully and wonderfully with the power to heal. Remember, you must take care of your health first, before you can take care of others. So continue to take the time you need to learn what works best for your body. And in no time, you'll be on the way to living your happiest, healthiest life!

With so much information (and MIS-information) floating around out there, it's hard to get a clear picture of what the ketogenic diet actually is.

In an effort to get the facts, we have connected with 2 of the top experts on the ketogenic diet: Dr. Josh Axe and Jordan Rubin, founders of Ancient Nutrition.

We can't wait to share the TRUTH about the ketogenic diet and also give you the details of the “TTAC Keto360 Challenge.”

Join us THIS MONDAY (January 7th) at 5pm EST as we hang out with Josh and Jordan on the inaugural webinar of 2019.

Register HERE for FREE webinar >>

The post Keto for Women: Is Cyclical Ketosis Right for You? appeared first on The Truth About Cancer.