#someone in poland is trolling me truly

[mymitochondriaforpresident]

An update:

See guys? You can even see it in his eyes. He’s fine.

[eurosong]

Undo my ESC - 2019, SF1

Hello there, folks, and welcome to the first part of Undo my ESC, where I take a look at the field this year and, for each country, make a feasible change – as small as, for example, minor tinkerings with the staging, or as big as a different song completely winning a national final. It’s all light-hearted and just my opinion, of course. Allons-y... Cyprus: We start off completely in the deep end. I loathe “Fuego”, and this repackaged Fue2.0 is no better and is indeed perhaps worse to me given that I hate desperate attempts to catch lightning in the same jar. I also find Tamta a very unsympathetic character. I don’t know what I’d do to improve this, other than replace the internal selection with a national final with some songs actually in Greek and with local character. Montenegro: Things do not improve... but at least the solution is easier! Montenegro had a decent national final in which literally any other song would have been a better choice. I particularly liked “Nevinost”, and so did the unfortunately out-voted expert jury, so would be tempted to give D mol’s ticket to Tel Aviv to its artist, Ivana Popović, instead. I do find D mol to be sweet kids though, so the other part of me would be sad to rob them of their time in the limelight and would instead have taken the 90s throwback and bizarre random background sound elements out of their song, replaced the score with one that emphasised the traditional musical elements, and kept the lyrics in Montenegrin.

Finland: Three strikes and I am almost out. I really struggle with the new UMK format – I understand the logic behind it, just as I did when it was a thing in the UK in the early 90s, but I think it only really works if an artist has a wide-ranging repertoire. If not, then you end up with 3 samey songs that only appeal to people who like the music styles that artist makes. I’m not an EDM fan and I would have taken the relative flop of Saara Aalto last year as indication to return to a multi-artist UMK. Plenty of artists from previous years who could be worth a spot in one such.

Poland: I was disappointed by the disappearance of Poland’s national final, but I can’t say I was too surprised after a few underperforming years. I have to commend the Polish broadcasters for going for something popular within their own country, without being overly preöccupied as to how it would play outwith their borders. Pali się is one of those entries that I don’t like much but which I respect. My changes would be to remove the pointless English intro and outro, which, if one were not paying attention, one might not notice actually being in English. I’d also try to make the song a little less linear, as the song feels mostly confined to one pace.

Slovenia: Finally, we come to a country where I can change next to nothing. Many people I know were disappointed that “Kaos” was not elected as the Slovenes’ song. Whilst I found it an earworm, I really didn’t like her haughty, “I’m only in EMA to promote my new disc” attitude – and I really preferred the delectable, contemplative and intimate “Sebi.” It’s pure elegance in simplicity, and I wouldn’t need to change a thing.

Czechia: I appreciate the Czechs’ creätive way of bypassing the expenses of a traditional national final – whilst still giving fans a choice – by holding their selection online. Really cute this year was the way they tried to equalise differences in funding by making the candidates’ official video be a low-budget affair filmed in their flats. I liked quite a few songs of their selection, with the eventual winner, “Friend of a friend”, middle of my rankings. I would, of course, opt for my #1 of the NF to win instead, the delightful slice of “Bohemiana del Rey” style that was “True Colours.”

Hungary: Hungary’s A Dal has the cachet to attract a number of returning artists, so it was not surprising that, eventually, it would be won by someone who’d triumphed before – and I’m delighted it was Joci Papái, one of the biggest revelations of the Hungarian NFs for me. Yet, as is often the case with folk coming back to take a second bite of the cherry, the sophomore effort comes short of the first – “Az én apám” is lovely, touching, but lacks the bite and edge that “Origo” had. I might have JP come second and hopefully return for a second victory in 2020/1 with something a bit stronger, and send in his place the soaring but melancholic “Madár, repülj”.

Belarus: Life is too short to do some things, and whilst I try to listen to pretty much every national final song, one of the things life is too short for is intensively following the Belarusian national finals with their hundred-odd auditions. I saw a few, though, and they were a rum lot. Musically, Aura’s touching “Čaravala” was probably the best of those I heard – but was also strangely won over by the unpretentious, fun ode to tubers that was “Potato, aka Buľba” and depending on my mood, I might give it the nod either.

Serbia: Beovizija had a great lineüp yet again, and there were a number of songs I would have been happy to have gotten the win, including the eventual winner, but also those of Saška Janks, Extra Nena and Ivana Vladović. The latter’s beautiful “Moja bol”, with strings to die for, was my favourite on the night, but in retrospect, I’m not sure I’d replace the equally stunning “Kruna.” I’d be tempted to send it in its acoustic version though, where Nevena’s lovely voice stands out even better.

Belgium: Ô, Belgium. I adored “City Lights”, and so my expectations were really high. This is nice enough, but a bit beige, and doesn’t quite deliver, especially the way the enjoyably tense verses lead to an anticlimactically limp chorus. I’d change that with something that actually feels like a pay off to the verses and the Walloons would have a better shot of shining again.

Georgia: I have to say that, once again, I find myself being one of the few people I know who has some love for Georgia. Whilst it wasn’t truly my cup of tea, I appreciated and enjoyed Iriao’s song last year on some level, and the same is true of Oto’s – he has a powerful voice and it’s a strong, if rather unsettling song. I think, though, that I prefer the darkly ethereal Sevdisperi zgva, which sounds like what I imagine would result if Björk were tasked to write a Bond tune.

Australia: After a few years of rumours, Oz finally jumped on the national final train, and, credit where it is due, it was one of the most intriguing national finals of the year. It was as if SBS had decided to atone for its aggressively MOR pop picks of previous years by actually showcasing some musical diversity. Unlike a lot of folk, I don’t dislike “Zero gravity” – it has a meaningful lyrical background and some quirky charm. But there’s no question about whether I would replace it and with what. I still get chills every time I listen to “2000 and Whatever” – the sheer, irrepressible burst of positive energy and the power of its “kulila miranyi” still give me goosebumps. Damn straight one of the best song of the entire year.

Iceland: Given the amount of hype Hatari have received – and how fans flooded videos of its competitors with comments about how they shouldn’t “fuck up” by picking them instead – I may be one of the very few who would change the result there. Yet, I almost definitely would, even though I typically like lesser-heard genres at Eurovision and like the heavier, industrial musical style. And yet, I find this quite trying. It seems like a very knowing, art school student pastiche and I’m not here for their “above the contest” feel or the BDSM gimmickry. I’d be tempted to replace this with the low-key but lovely “Hvað ef ég get ekki elskað”, or to at least pare back the OTT disdainful irony.

Estonia: It feels almost like another era when I was a firm exponent of the idea of Eesti being Beesti. Three years of immense disappointments will quench that type of fire. Whilst leaving behind the stunning Spirit Animal in 2017 and opting for a generic poperatic vocal exercise in 2018 were excruciating, this might be the biggest let down yet – a land of so many talented musicians having to rely on an Avicii pastiche sang with no small difficulty by a reedy-voiced Swede. I found Eesti Laul very slim pickings this year, and found the other two frontrunners to be rather bland too – even the delightful Sandra Nurmsalu came with a tune that, whilst pleasant, sounded less nomadic epic and more toilet tissue commercial backing track. I would have gone for Kadiah’s delicate “Believe” as my pick instead.

Portugal: FdC was once again one of the best national finals, and the one for whose result I was perhaps most anxious. There were a few songs I really liked, like “Pugna”, “Mais brilhante...” and “Inércia”, but when the dust settled, there was only one song I wanted to see winning – “Telemóveis,” of course, which I was delighted to see prevail. I have some real worries about the bizarre staging distracting from the message and emotional power of the song, though. There’s so much going on, and it might be enough to push people from being entranced to being weirded out. I’d get rid of the spoons, sort out the clothes and try to make things impressive without being so extra.

Greece: I actually really like Greece this year, even if I’m still pissed off at what they did to “Don’t forget the sun” in their dubiously axed national final last year. Her voice is beautiful, the music is uplifting and anthemic, the æsthetic is curious and a bit culty, but at least memorable. The one thing I don’t like? The lyrics, which sound like a bunch of motivational Instagram quote clichés loosely knitted together. Sing something actually meaningful, preferably in Greek.

San Marino: Lord, I’m not going to start because if I do, I shan’t stop. All I’ll say is that San Marino’s “troll nation” status is wearing thin for me. Unbelievably, hundreds of talented people came out in numbers last year willing to represent them, and yet they went with a song written supposedly in 5 minutes but probably in half that. I’d have invited Sara de Blue back instead to make up for the bizarre fiasco that was last year’s 1in360. And the automatic qualifiers:

France: If France’s national delegation aren’t rethinking their voting system after this year, then they ought to be. It’s the opposite of Sweden, where the juries really have the power and the televote is scattered – all you need is a frenzied following to overturn a low jury placement. I liked a great number of Destination Eurovision’s selection this year. I would have taken pretty much ány single one of them over the snivelling, bombastic, self-aggrandising drivel that is Roi. With regards to what to send in its place, I’m torn between the powerful “Là haut”; the adorably, quintessentially French “Allez leur dire”; or the energetic, indefatigable earworm that was “On cherche encore”.

Israel: Boy howdy, Israel sure want to do their level best to avoid fluking a 1979 and winning on home ground, eh? I heard there were many big names who sent songs in, though I’m unsure if any of them would have helped to make the stormy Kobi seem more sympathetic. I think I would have opted to let Ketreyah perform for the hosts instead.

Spain: After a great national final last year, I was really disappointed with the subpar quality of the so-called eurotemazos which were anything but. Miki’s song was the best of a bad lot and at least he didn’t have the hideously negative attitude some of the other people, who seemed surprised and aghast that the winner of a contest related to Eurovision could end up performing there. I’d try to give Miki a song that matched his energy with at least a bit more lyrical depth.

Join me in some days when I evaluate what I would change with SF2!

[thetravellingvagrant]

Day 11- Lviv/Krakow: In Which I Smuggle A Sausage

I had booked a bus departing Lviv for 7:30am. Ostensibly, my reasoning for this was so I could get to my new destination early and not waste any of the scant two days I had planned to spend, there. At the time, this reasoning had seemed sound, though as I peeled my face off my pillow, all caked in saliva and night-tears at five past six in the morning, I was no longer so sure.

Regardless, this was the boat I had put myself in and it was now my duty to solemnly stand at its bow as it slipped below the icy waves. And those waved definitely were icy today; I posted a screen shot of the temperature that I would have to endure for my walk to the bus stop, some days ago, so this will definitely not come as a surprise, but it was to be -9, with a real-feel temperature rating of -19. That's effing ludicrous is what that is.

I bundled myself up as best I could, making use of my extra thick socks, faintly ridiculous hat and both pairs of stolen gloves and left, chucking the keys to the apartment through an open window as I had been instructed to by my host.

While my extra layers provided some degree of protection, there is, however, only so much that post office own brand gloves can do, and so I arrived at what I guessed was where the bus would leave from, forty five minutes after I left the flat, frozen to the bone, wheezing heavily and terrifyingly dishevelled. I still wasn't totally sure where exactly I was supposed to catch this bus, though; Google had reliably informed me that Pizzaria Napoleta was the pizzeria I had scoped out the previous day, though had at some point, presumably quite recently, had changed its name, (which is obviously unbelievably helpful when trying to find it in a hurry) though I still hadn't really got a clue where buses would stop around there. As I arrived, however, I could see in the carpark nearby, a couple of big boi buses (some may call them coaches) pulled up and ready for action. I lumbered over to them.

The first of them that I approached certainly didn't seem like my bus. It was from a different company to the one advertised on my ticket and apparently started and ended its journey in different locations. It did go through Krakow, though, so my vagrant sense tingled and I decided to check, anyway.

Irritatingly, or perhaps thankfully, depending on your viewpoint, it actually was my bus. I wasn't quite sure how I was supposed to actually know that by any means other than sheer, dumb luck, but I guess it was fine. I was on board now and wouldn't die of exposure and in the end, isn't that all that really matters?

I have honestly very little to say about my bus journey. It was longer than expected (owing to the ticket listing both arrival and departure points in local time, though not factoring that in to the journey length listed underneath) though not terribly uncomfortable, as far as eight hour bus journeys go.  I did have a few odd moments while passing the border control into Poland, however- which, by the way, took up three of the eight hours of travel and was generally total shit on every level. The first of these moments came when the weirdly authoritarian jobsworth of a Polish passport control officer came to look at my documents.

“...do you have any ID?” she asked, already holding my passport in her hands.

My eyes narrowed. “...yyyyyes?”

She waited expectantly

“...you're holding it” I continued.

“Another ID, driving license, national ID anything”

I told her, quite confused at this point that I did not. I had rather expected that the passport would be enough, as it had been and should be for literally every country in Europe, but she would not acquiesce. I ended up going through my wallet and finding an very old student card from like 2007, which I showed her.

“...That's honestly all I have” I stated, plainly, my confusion giving way to irritation at this point.

“...What did you study?” she asked.

“...Philosophy!” I answered, abruptly. The fuck was this?

She took a moment and handed both my passport and student card back to me. Apparently I had passed the secret troll test and could now pass, unhindered? I guess?!

I had noticed, also, once we pulled up to the crossing, large signs positioned everywhere, telling me that it was strictly forbidden to bring and meat, cheese or dairy into the country with me. I began to sweat as my eyes darted to the little carrier bag full of food I had brought with me. Inside lay a half a cured sausage and a full block of Ukrainian cheese (which, while an excellent euphemism for drugs, in this case was not). What could I do? Inform someone that I had meat and cheese with me and have them summarily dispose of it? Of course not, aside from those being the actions of an oddball, I wasn't letting anyone touch my fucking cheese, and so I did what I felt I had to and kept schtum. This made for a terrifically exciting bag check. As the bulky old polish man rifled through my belongings, I waited for him to lay his hands on my big sausage- easy now- and for the jig to be up. I remained clenched throughout this entire procedure, ready to bolt for the border at a moment's notice, but fortunately his search was not thorough enough to find my illicit cargo. He waved me through and I was officially a smuggler. It was some buzz; I might try it with heroin, next time.

After hours and hours and hours, the bus arrived in Krakow and I filed off, all mangled up and exhausted to head to my hostel. The check in process was exceptionally pleasant, due in no small part to the very friendly receptionist, who effortlessly made small talk, laughing at all my shit, tired half-jokes while chewing through the admin of my booking. Notably though, she made a bit of a misstep when describing what one could do and see in the city.

“Down here” she said, while doing a big circle on my map “is Jewish Quarter”

“ah, okay, cool” I replied, more asleep than I was interested.

“Yes, it's very nice there and sometimes you can see the proper old fashioned jewish people with the long hairs and the big hats”

I was just tired enough to not be able to keep quiet.

“You make it sound like a Jew-zoo or something”

She laughed, embarrassed. “No, no, not like a zoo, but its quite a cool thing to see, so if you get there you can see it”

...It did sound a bit like a Jew-zoo...

Putting aside her clear and deeply rooted anti-semitic views, I flopped onto my bed- another top bunk- and immediately fell asleep for an hour and a half, thereby nearly entirely invalidating the point of catching the earlier bus, which had worn me out so badly in the first place. Truly I am a master strategist.

Upon waking up, I had a reluctant and very long conversation with one of my new room-mates. A middle-aged Malaysian man whose name I still cannot remember, despite him telling me like four times. He was one of those people that just liked to tell you facts about things and places. Our conversation lasted, as I say, basically forever and was honestly around 95% him telling me things I didn't really care about and didn't plan to remember. Still, though, he was nice enough, so it didn't phase me that much.

I left the hostel at around 5 in the afternoon. It was already dark and freezing, when I did and I was still absolutely humped from the bus ride, so I didn't plan to stay out long. I had a quick walk around the old-town, which I vaguely remembered from my last trip to Krakow, a decade ago and took in the genuinely impressively dense christmas market

Thiqq

before giving up entirely and heading back to the hostel, via a restaurant which was decked out with a fairly tacky medieval theme and an expensive menu. Fuck it, though, I'd earned a nice meal after the day I'd had. I ordered a plate of potato pancakes, served with venison goulash

Thiqqer

and I demolished that fucking thing. There were no survivors. I headed back to the hostel for the old bibble-sleep combo, with my stomach fuller and my wallet emptier than either of those things should have been.

[borisbubbles]

17. PORTUGAL

Salvador Sobral - “Amar Pelos Dois” Winner

Oh snap! “How dare you boot Salvador this early, you monster!!” um i think he’s just fine, chill out?

I used to be fully on board the Salvador Speedboat, but sadly, he tarnished himself in my eyes by delivering one of the most self-serving, pompous winner speeches ever. “MUSIC ISN’T FIREWORKS, MUSIC IS EMOTION, THIS IS A VICTORY FOR ALL MUSIC” is a pretty rich statement coming from someone who was a blatant camera-mugger,

a provocateur pur sang,

and just in general took the mickey at this contest;

Like, all of the above moments are AWESOME but please do not insult our intelligence by pretending as if these didn’t definitely, DEFINITELY aid you in achieving that landslide win. Yes, Salvador, TELL us more about how you saved the face of Real Music [citation needed] or invented jazz, BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T YOU BLOWHARD TWAT :@

(but thanks for calling out the Demys and Robsaiahs anyway because god was it necessary).

Fortunately though, in spite of all the self-righteous hypocrisy, i’m mostly here for Salvador’s journey as it truly fascinates me.  Yeah, sure, I just YELLED at the man but I actually respect his role as enfant terrible quite a bit and even if you dislike “Amar Pelos Dois”, I feel like you should too.

How DOES one transform a hipster, extremely non-conformist entry such as “Amar Pelos Dois” into the most universally beloved Eurovision song of this decade exactly?

Well, children, it’s time to delve DEEPLY into how this contest truly fuctions and how Portugal managed to exploit one of the biggest, but most overlooked Eurovision loopholes.

I hope you’re ready because this write-up will be LONG.

To truly understand why Salvador won, we must first understand what he represents. Ask any casual eurofan what they think of Salvador and chances are they’re going to answer with finding him “genuine and heartfelt” if they’re a fan and “a con artist” if they’re not. Both ideas seem mutually exclusive but are in fact the two halves of the whole. The Yin and the Yang, if you will.

You see, Salvador’s entire mantra was indeed that he was “genuine” and free of all the frolics the other entries dabbled in. His act was just the song, bare and plain. By presenting “Amar Pelos Dois” intimately and keeping the tics to a minimum, Salvador managed to cast a mind-controlling spell over all of Europe, dismantling the language barrier and taking it home for Portugal.

The lusophone liberator

There is however a strong element of crafty subterfuge involved and no, I’m not talking about the tics. Salvador is a jazz singer and Jazz singers are weird by default; they have honky voices (evidenced by other ESC alumni who sang jazz in their early musical carreers, such as Jamala and Jana Burceska) and often improvize. Jazz Improv is virtually unheard of in our Eurovision bubble, but it’s a common performance method within the jazz circuit. This is why Salvador mimes, switches his voice’s pitch around, plays an air violin. It’s all part of the heat of the moment. There’s nothing overtly fake about this at all.

HOWEVER, by deliberately presenting yourself as guileless and then using seemingly gimmickless emotion AS YOUR MAIN STRATAGEM... that, my friends, is an A+ example of artifice. Salvador is not phony in SPITE of the emotion, but BECAUSE of it.

Naturally, this exploits a huge flaw within the system and not the one about “fastfood & borrowed music” (though that one should be addressed too imo). Why did “Amar Pelos Dois” win? Because of the song? Paradoxically, I don’t think the song itself  ever mattered. “Amar Pelos Dois” didn’t win because of *what* it is, but because of what it *is*.

In other words, Eurovision is evolving into something bigger than just a song contest. Songs aren’t by themselves winning anymore, despite Salvador’s victory signalling otherwise..Instead, concepts win and the country which executes an attractive concept the BEST during those three minutes, takes it home.

Ergo, “Real Music” won  in Eurovision 2017 but not in the way Salvador claims it did. He won because he successfully MARKETED his song as “real music” so everyone believed him and voted for him, juror and televoter alike.

What about other years? If we count back to the past three years, did ANY of Conchita, Mans or Jamala win because of their song... or because of what their songs represented at the time? This may sound bleak, but I actually don’t think it’s bad. It means that yes, a bad song could theoretically win for what it represents. However, in practice we find that a good performance IS key because without one you can’t ever sell it properly.  All of this actually makes me love “Amar Pelos Dois” more than I normally would have because this is the VERY first time I felt a country acknowledges this tactic and deliberately uses it to win. and It’s Portugal, OF ALL COUNTRIES.

I love how a bullied, unfairly maligned country like Portugal managed to troll all of Europe without them realizing it. <3

I love how Salvador spent every day in Kyiv mocking the SHIT out of the contest and was rewarded for it <3

I love how they -through sheer lack of gimmicks- managed to produce the gimmickest winner this contest has ever seen. <3

I love how they produced the biggest blowout winner this contest has seen since the early 80s. <3

I also love the woman, the legend, the CHIN that is Salvador’s sister Luisa, who owns one of my fave singing voices this year and got to share the limelight with Salvador during the winner’s reprisal, as she very much deserved!!

Finally, I love how this year has ended as a huge Portugese middlefinger against Europe for screwing them over for years and years and motherfucking YEARS and then managed to figure out the EXACT way to circumvent the language barrier and slay all opposition. It truly and finally establishes that any country is capable of winning. See you in Bern or Vilnius next year! (jk, it’ll probably be Saint Petersburg if the Only Returnees Win pattern keeps up. SAVE US, BOSNIA!!!)

Decade rank: 105/324

THE 2017 RANKING SO FAR:

-ADORE- 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. -LOVE- 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15.

-LIKE- 16. 17. Portugal (105/324) 18. Croatia (115/324) 19. Austria (119/324) 20. France (138/324) 21. Poland (154/324) 22. Armenia (158/324) 23. Romania (164/324)

-OKAY- 24. Iceland (174/324) 25. Ukraine (190/324) 26. San Marino (203/324) 27. Albania (217/324) 28. Denmark (228/324) 29. Spain (237/324) 30. Cyprus (240/324) -DISLIKE- 31. Germany (258/324) 32. Montenegro (263/324) 33. Sweden (270/324) 34. Serbia (275/324) 35. Australia (280/324) 36. Switzerland (286/324) 37. Czech Republic (288/324) 38. Malta (291/324) -HATE- 39. Georgia (301/324) 40. Greece (303/324) 41. Slovenia (307/324) 42. Ireland (312/324)

[akane171]

Yoh, Trolling-since-chernobyl here. I was tagged by my dear salt shaker @reddragonlilly7 (oh, you little…!) but because akane171 blog is boring and I don’t really interact with people here, I will use my salty fam from my side blog. Ohohoh, I’m evil. 

Answer 11 questions, tag 11 people, write 11 questions for them to answer. 

1. How many languages do you speak? Which are they? – erm, if it means “how many I have learnt and can order a beer nothing else”- Polish (my native), English, Japanese, German, French, Italian, Latin. And I more or less I can understand Slovakian, because it’s similar to Polish. 2. What is your dream job or life goal? – my dream job expectation is something low like – give me my money, so I can eat, pay my bills and buy books, so maybe we should focus on my life goals aka living my life and not giving a flying shit. Exciting, I know. 3. If you could hang out with one historical person who would it be and why? – Stanisław Lem, Polish sci fi writer. One of the most amazing, funny and wise people. Can you believe he wrote a story about intelligent POTATOES in space? And I can tell you – it’s simply SPLENDID. 4. If you could murder one person in the entire world - could be anyone, political figure, family member, online - and get away with it, who would it be? -… I seriously don’t hate anyone that much but when the Minister of National Defence for Poland is a mentally ill crazy idiot who hates Russia and loves conspiracy theories… then well, you have your answer. 5. Also where would you bury that son of a bitch? Bury? Lol, I would drop him into ocean and watch how sharks would eat him. I just hope poor fishes would not die because of him. 6. Name 3 characters that died and you truly mourned them. Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallah from the Witcher (damn, it still hurts). Rudy from Stones on the Barricade – based on facts, he was a teenage boy who fought with Nazi Germans, was caught and tortured but he didn’t compromised his friends. They recaptured him, but he died shortly after. We read it in the middle school. I still have depression when I think about it. And Mufasa, no shit people. I’m still traumatized. 7. Which was your fave cartoon character as a kid? – Little My from Moomin series. She is me :D 8. Which is your Hogwarts House? The test said I’m Gryffindor, but my heart and brain say Slytherin. 9. If you had Harry Potter type of magical powers for one day what would you do? – change myself into a cat, climb the tree, sit there for whole day without giving a fuck 10. What is your favorite movie? God, one? You are cruel, sis :( Fight Club or Hana-bi, can’t decide. 11. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? OR alternative question: Who was your favorite teacher? – nope, I haven’t. I seriously liked my Polish teacher from middle school. She was 50 year old, strict lady but she was very fair and hmmm, she broadened my mind. Me and my friend still visit her from time to time and talk about weirdest shit with her, she is truly amazing.

My shit for you:

1.     First thing you think or say right after waking up. 2.     What is worse – your absolute NOTP becoming an end game or your fav character dying? 3.     Thing/person/monster etc. that scared the shit out of you when you was a kid. 4.     The last time you (mentally) facepalmed or rolled your eyes. It happened because - 5.     What would you do, if you met an exhibitionist in park? 6.     Small talks – yay! or BURN IT WITH FIRE! 7.     If you could delete that one blog on tumblr that you absolutely hate, would you do it? 8.     Your favorite guilty pleasure :) *evil laugh* 9.     Would you want to know the date of your death? 10.  Which movie, tv series or book you would want to rewrite or change the ending? 11.   Something you want to tell the world, but so far nobody ask you (you are welcome).

I’m going to torture: @hachievans @robwrecks @i-thought-you-and-i @fluffyotters @whydidyouflyaway  @multigloria @cookie-hearts-with-17stars @itsana00 @pandorasss-box @dylerxobrosey – if someone did it already, please tag me <3