#somehow i got so many new followers today hello hello hello!!!!

[llondonfog]

💚

[jarofstyles]

Leather & Lace

Hello my angels and welcome to Leather and Lace!!! We’ve got a very cute 3 parter (I’ve finished writing it) coming in for you guys. We love a good grumpy x sunshine and couldn’t help ourselves writing another one. Please leave us feedback! We love to hear from you

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Wc- 8.2k

Warnings- oral sex, praise kink, soft Dom h, opposites attract, cum play/swapping

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“How can you be this happy in the morning?” Harry grunted, hoodie pulled over his head as he sat down next to a bubbly Y/N. Her couch was comfortable but it didn’t make up for the fact that he was at her flat at 8 in the morning. 

“It’s not that early, lazy bones.” She hummed, tucking her legs under her as she sat down on the other side. “Thank you for coming to help today, by the way. I know you don’t like getting up early.”

He really didn’t, was the thing. He hated it. Harry only had so many days off and after working a long shift bartending last night, the very last thing he wanted to do was help someone unpack in their new flat. He’d rather claw at concrete than be awake right now, rather eat a raw egg, rather go through tattoo removal. If it was anyone but Y/N he would have laughed in their face at the mere ask. 

But it was her. It was twinkly eyed, pouty lipped, warm hearted Y/N who had asked him a week in advance and promised him a bagel with cream cheese and an iced coffee for brekkie, whatever he wanted for lunch, and ‘whatever he wanted in general!’. Little did she know he was going to say yes anyway, considering he knew he couldn’t say no to her sweet little ask with her smaller hand on his tattooed arm and wide eyes peering up at him. He wasn’t someone who liked to do things for many people without there being some sort of monetary gain, but this was different. 

Y/N had somehow latched herself onto one of the grumpiest bastards in the area while she herself was one of the sweetest girls he’d ever seen. Rarely spoke a mean word of anyone (except when they hurt someone close to her), went out of her way to help anyone who needed it and always wanted to be a shoulder to cry on. He’d seen her take money from her own wallet to cover someone’s bill when they were short, even seen her rush to help an elderly man across the street. It got her into trouble sometimes which was why he was glad that he’d been the hip she’d chosen to attach to. 

Their first interaction had been him sitting in the courtyard of their uni, listening to music under the tree. He’d had his sketchbook in hand, doodling in between classes when he looked up to see a girl with a pretty yellow bow in her hair offering him a cupcake because he looked ‘sad.’. He had been sad, actually, but that was pretty much his normal resting face. He’d tried to blow her off but she’d taken a seat next to him, introducing herself and telling him about her own day to ‘distract him’. He hated to admit that it worked. 

From then on, she popped up everywhere. At first he’d been a bit worried that she was following him but it truly was a coincidence. Y/N had found her way under his skin, wriggled her way into that cold heart of his and made it warm up just a little each time she came around. At some point she’d become a daily fixture in his life, her texts lighting up his phone with emojis and telling him to meet her at the cafe or the library- and for some reason, he followed.

“Mmm. Know y’wanted me here to see me get all sweaty. If y’wanted to see my tats and muscles so badly, you coulda just said so, Sweets.” He smirked, watching her eyes widen. So easy to fluster. 

“No! Stop teasing me, s’not nice.” She grumbled, poking his knee with her socked foot. She’d chosen lavender striped ones today. “I don’t have a lot of strong friends, you know that. Niall’s comin’ by after work to help you put the bedframe together and move the books from the car. Besides, I’ll let you sleepover and everything after we’re all done. I know you loveeeee my bed.”

He did. But more than anything he liked laying in said bed with her. Harry had a hard time admitting he had begun to gain feelings for the girl but deep down he knew he did. He liked that she insisted on cuddles, curling her leg around his and nuzzling her face into his chest, or even better yet the crook of his neck. Loved when she’d sleepily ask him questions about his life and tell him facts about her own. She resembled a tiny kitten while sleepy, insistent on getting all of the pets and attention. 

Harry had decided he wasn’t the relationship type after his last girlfriend had cheated on him with his old best mate- but meeting Y/N had reminded him of the die hard romantic that laid underneath the surface. All the hard work he’d had piling up bricks on top of his red, bleeding heart had seemed to be consistently excavated by the pastel wearing girl who still enjoyed the fairy lights he used to see online in those aesthetic bedroom photos. It scared him a bit at first. Even now, he was nervous about the idea of getting closer to her than they were now because her heart was a tender and precious thing and he didn’t necessarily trust himself not to hurt her- but then again, he knew he’d do miles better than anyone else could. He’d spent the time learning about her as the months went by, listening to her drawl on about the pinterest boards she made, her dream finds she always looked for at the thrift stores, her least favorite reality TV contestants, which pastries she found to be too dry at the cafe and which had the best level of moisture, what blankets she liked, every little tidbit he had stored away in his brain to use at a later date. 

No one would be as protective of her as he would be, which was why lately he’d been entertaining the thought of perhaps moving past the point of no return and trying to see if maybe, possibly, perhaps.. They could be more. 

It had come with a lot of deliberating but he’d come to understand that if he failed, Y/N wouldn’t caste him to the side. She’d never in a million years abandon him like he feared, which only gave him more motivation to go for it though… He was still biding his time. He had to let her get settled here before he shook up her life a bit more. 

They were opposites, the sweet girl and him. Harry was quite literally the bad boy cliche of everyone’s after school special’s dreams. His hair was long and curled, brushing his jaw. He went for darker clothing, usually his ripped black skinny jeans and a band tee but sometimes more eccentric with some silk and leaving his tits out when they went on a night out. His nose had a simple black hoop, his nails painted and chipped though this week they were a bubblegum pink, a la Y/N’s expertise. His body was hard from the gym he liked to frequent and inked, only getting more every month. He wore the occasional eyeliner when he felt spicy. That was only the physical things. 

Sometimes he wondered why she felt drawn to him, as she said. He was dark and moody with a darker sense of humor. Somewhat of a pessimist, he expected the worst from people and tended to stay away from them the best he could. The opposite of a social butterfly, he only usually went out in the past for a drink or to get his cock wet, never for the pleasure of interacting with people. Even then it was rare considering he did quite well in the hookup area being a bartender himself. 

Harry often wondered how and why she felt the pull to be around him and why she felt so at ease in his presence but he figured it had to be that he’d knocked the lights out of a bloke in her philosophy class who’d been riding her ass. He’d made the wrong decision of cornering Y/N at a party Harry had been dragged to, touching her a bit too much and not listening when her smile became thin and she backed away from him after giving a rejection much too polite than the man deserved. There had been no hesitation in laying him out, tugging Y/N into his side and demanding she stay with him for the rest of the party after she insisted she didn’t need to go home. 

Funnily enough she’d been a hit with his own small group of friends, everyone also feeling the same sort of kindred protection over her. Not many people were genuinely warm and fuzzy in the way she was. 

Y/N was… She was the sun, she was a cinnamon roll fresh baked on a sunday morning, she was a kitten sprawled in a sunbeam. All the good things, he could find a way to relate them to her. That probably should have been the indicator he had feelings for her far sooner than he’d ever let himself admit, but she had taken the time to crack him open. 

It was hard to stop thinking about what made her both his opposite and so special. Harry dwelled on how soft her clothing always was, both in color and texture. She liked those pastel colors and fuzzy cardigans, hair bows and those signature mary janes with the tiny heels. Lip oil as opposed to lip gloss because it was ‘too sticky’ but still dragged all his attention to her lips and made him wonder if it really tasted like tangerine like it smelled. 

Her touch was gentle and tender, cautious at first but as soon as she got the go ahead, she showered you in attention. At least, she did to him. Brushing stray hairs out of faces and wiping crumbs off cheeks, she had little sense of personal space once granted permission. She’d been mindful of his distaste for touch at the beginning but once he’d leaned into it, the girl had no qualms about straightening his shirt or leaning into his form, hell- there had been a few times she’d helped herself to his lap when there was no other seating option. Usually that was when she was tipsy considering she would most likely be a little shy sober, but that was something he enjoyed. 

The light to his dark, he doubted anyone else could make him feel the way she could. Hence why he was up after only getting 4 hours of sleep, sipping the coffee she’d gotten him. There was little he wouldn’t do for a hint of her smile. 

—--

“Babe, you’ve got t’make a decision.” Harry said gently, placing the large mirror down and leaning it against the wall. 

“I know, I know but… It’s bad luck to have your mirror facing your bed.” She wrung her fingers together. “I’m sorry, H. I know I’ve been a bit of a pain in the rear today. I promise m’not trying to, but It’s my first place and I just want it to be perfect.” Her head looked down, making his heart squeeze. 

God damn it. Leave it to her to make him feel like he’d kicked a puppy. Sighing, he tugged the bandana on his head back into place and approached her, placing his hand on her shoulder. “M’not upset with you. Promise. I just think you’re overthinking it a bit.” Her superstitions did tend to make her feel a little squirrely sometimes and he knew it.  “We’re gonna make it look perfect. Incredible, even. Reckon the magazines will be calling you up to feature you, but we can’t just have a freestanding mirror slab.” He’d picked it up for her off of craigslist just a bit ago. Even if it wasn’t a dodgy listing, he wouldn’t let her go on her own. That’s how people got kidnapped. 

“Ugh, I know.” She groaned, flopping into his chest. Never mind it being sweaty, she rubbed her nose between his tits and let out a tired groan, her hair smacking his chin. It’d been tossed up in a very messy bun that was a bit lopsided but made her look doubly as cute, though he didn’t tell her that. “Why don’t we mount it to the back of your door then? Not facing your bed, or another mirror.” 

He could almost hear her brain going as she mulled it over before he felt the nod against his chest. “That will be good, I think. I love that idea.” Y/N had been going back and forth over design choices with him all day as if he had a clue about interior decor, but he had appreciated her caring about his opinion nonetheless. “That can be the last thing we do. Niall’s fucked off somewhere futzing with the books so we can eat after that’s done.” 

The thud of his heart against her ear was steady as he gently ran a hand over her shoulderblade. “What’s on the menu?” 

“Think we’re ordering pizza because I know m’too tired to cook which means you lot have to be too.” She chuckled, finally prying herself out of his chest and blinking up at him.”Then we can go to bed.”  He was thankful her ear was away from his heart so she couldn’t hear the way it stuttered. You’d think after sleeping in her bed a multitude of times that he’d get used to the sound of that sentence but it still did him in every time. 

“Okay. I can run and pick it up after I mount this to the door if you call it in.” He knew she wouldn’t want to go. It was visible on her face how tired she was and it melted him internally. He knew that she’d be a little snuggly menace tonight and fuck if he wasn’t looking forward to it. “Gonna run into the pharmacy t’grab some body wash for here, if thats okay?”

“Course it is.” She beamed at the suggestion, making him happy that he’d even brought it up. Y/N used to suggest he sleep heer a lot before and he’d refuse, thinking she was just trying to be polite- but she really did enjoy him staying with her. “I liked the pomegranate one you used last time, just sayin’.” Patting his chest she moved from his grip, heading to grab her phone. “Normal for you?”

“Yeah, love. Same as usual.” He rubbed over the achy spot in his chest that she’d left by pulling away, looking forward to sleeping tonight so he could feel it fill back up.

—-----------

Harry had grabbed the pomegranate bath stuff. He’d grabbed the whole line, actually, the shampoo, conditioner, body wash and some sort of ‘skin buff.’ Whatever that was. 

Y/N had squeaked as he showed her, along with a pack of the makeup wipes she usually used and he’d steal. He’d figured it was about time to be the one to buy the replacements. “Ah! And you got the face mask I like.” Her eyes were wide and bright as she bounced on her toes, smacking a kiss to his stubbly cheek before looking back down at the holographic packaging. He’d hoped he had gotten the right one when he’d seen a sale on them when on his way to the check out counter. It was worth the little bit of money to feel her lips for a moment. “Thank you, H. You’re the best, as usual.” 

“The hell am I?” Niall scoffed, wiping his hands dry after washing them. 

“You’re great too, but he got me the face masks I like and they usually sell out. So he’s a bit higher up in points today.” She placated him, brushing past him to put them in the bathroom. “Harry, plate up the pizza, pretty please!”

As soon as she had disappeared, Niall shot him a look. “When are you two gonna make it official?” He whispered. “The heat eyes bouncin’ off the both of you is sickening at this point. She’s turned you soft.” 

Harry settled with a glare, placing two slices on the paper plate and sliding it over to him. “Eventually. Her whole life is shifting. Can’t do shit right now without rattling her.” It was the first time he admitted or even hinted at having feelings for her besides point blank telling anyone who came around that she wasn’t available. Y/N didn’t know he did that though. 

“Thank fuck you don’t still have your head up your arse. I was worried you’d never admit you’re gone for her.” He faked wiping sweat off his head making the other man roll his eyes. “She’ll be happy, H. You don’t have to worry about her rejecting you. Just go on and do it. She talks about you like you hang the moon every night at this point even when you aren’t around.” 

A weakness he’d spotted, Harry stood a bit straighter before leaning in. “She does? What does she say?” Oh, he hated how desperate he sounded to hear the answer but the fluttering in his stomach made him insisting on finding out. 

“Oh, how thoughtful and kind and generous you are and how you’re the best person she knows, all of that. She stares at her phone and waits for texts from you when she comes out and you’re working, gets these huge smiles or giggles when you do. or tries to get everyone to move the party to your bar.” 

That last part, he’d hoped for. He liked the idea of her wanting to be physically close to him and suggesting everyone come and see him, but knowing she did the same thing he did when waiting for messages from him soothed a piece of him. He wasn’t alone in it. It was hard sometimes for him to decipher her behavior considering she was genuinely so friendly with everyone and he didn’t want to flatter himself and think it he was special… but apparently he was. 

He didn’t have a chance to answer when Y/N glided from the bathroom, finding her spot on the kitchen barstools. “What did I miss?” 

“Nothin’, Babe. Just chatting shit.” He murmured, sliding her a plate with her pizza of choice on it. “Figured we’d go to the grocery tomorrow, yeah? It’s a bit sparse in here with the food.” He had the next day off and intended on spending it with her. They’d made lots of progress today and had 80% of the place unpacked, but he knew she liked those restocking videos online. “Think they’ve got those organizers back in stock.” 

“Oh!” She gasped.”Yes, you genius. I’ll need your help though, strong man. I like the one trip wonder.” It was a tease considering she knew Harry hated making multiple trips up with bags. 

“Lucky for you, you’ve got a lift now and I’ve got that collapsible wagon.” Reaching out he gently flicked her nose for being a brat. “So we won’t have t’worry about that.” 

—-----

Y/N was either very oblivious or a tease. Harry could never fully figure out which one. 

He sat on her bed, messing with her telly when she emerged from the shower in her little cotton shorts and one of his shirts. It was one he’d just been looking for last week, actually, an old Iron Maiden one with a few holes in the collar area. Unmistakably his. The faded gray complimented her skin, looking extra cozy on her as her powder blue plush bunny slippers flopped against the ground and she made her way to her skincare desk. 

“You little thief.” He grumbled from the bed, leaning against her headboard. “I was searching everywhere for that last week.” Though he had narrowed eyes she would know he was only teasing. 

“You left it with me, remember? I ended up packing it so I wouldn’t forget it but… It’s super comfy.” She smiled guiltily at him, spinning in her chair. “Is it okay if I wear it? It still smells like your cologne and it helps me sleep sometimes…”

Ah, a shot to the heart. 

Y/N didn’t know what it did to him to know he was an aid in good sleep. That it both made his heart stutter and his cock throb at the sight of her wrapped up in his clothing like she had all the rights to it. Like he was her boyfriend and she liked to wear it to remember him. Her scent had a similar effect on him, leaving it in his sheets when she stayed over,  “Totally okay, lovely.” He smiled gently. “M’just teasing you. Though it does wonders for my ego to know you like my cologne that much.” 

He knew he was making her a little flustered considering she didn’t look right at him, but he thrived off of that. Knowing he made an impact on her like that made him feel just a bit more confident that she felt similarly to him. There was no answer from her, but he wasn’t done with her quite yet. Standing up with a groan, he made his way over to her little makeup and skincare set up, placing his hands on the back of her chair. “What are you putting on your face?” He asked curiously, looking over her head to the products she had neatly organized.

“Well, first I wipe with one of these toning pads.” She opened the little tub, using a tiny pair of clear tongs to grab one. “You don’t want to be sticking your fingers in there and potentially making them all dirty so it came with this little thing. You give it a few passes over your t zone.” She showed him as she did it, Harry watching diligently in the mirror. 

“Mmm. Then what? You’re always doin’ all of this fancy stuff to your face. Figure that's why your skin is so pretty.” He let his fingers fiddle with a few strands of hair. 

“Thank you.” She said sheepishly, picking up a smaller tube. “Um, I use this undereye cream to help with puffiness and brightening. Its soothing. I apply it with the smallest finger though, because while I’m not afraid of wrinkles it’s the weakest fingers and the skin under your eyes is more delicate.” 

Huh. “Didn’t know what.” He was actually learning something from this. 

“Mhm. Why do you think I tell you to go gentle when you use the makeup remover?” A smile tilted up one side of her lips a bit further, eyes focused on the mirror in front of her. She pretended not to notice the slight shiver he gave her when he leaned down, letting his face get more level with hers- but he did. He noticed anything he could. “A-And then I use some vitamin C stuff for brightening, a serum and a cream. I use the little fan to make it dry faster so it isn’t sticky.” She pointed to the mini pink fan he’d always noticed. He’d just assumed it was for when she got hot. “Do you… Would you like me to use some of it on you when I’m done?” 

She sounded hesitant to ask which he understood. Not a lot of the guys in their friend circle would want that, but he wasn’t that insecure about himself that he’d say no to someone pampering him. Especially not when it meant Y/N getting close to him. “Sure, sweets. I’d love that. Reckon my skin needs it.” 

“What do you usually do with it?” She asked curiously, meeting his eye in the mirror. 

“Makeup remover, wash my face, that cream you left at my place if I remember.” 

“It’s not fair you have the skin you do.” She huffed, shaking her head. “Cruel, actually.” It kind of was. He got long lashes too, which she always complained about. “Go and wash your face first, heathen.”

Harry let out a small laugh before going off to do that. Returning with a fresh face, he stood in his prior position, watching her finish up the routine before holding the fan closer to her face to finish it off. It was an interesting process he hadn’t paid much mind to before, but then again, she didn’t bring every single thing to his place either. 

After putting her hair up in a claw clip, she stood up from the plushy chair and motioned for him to sit down. He did as asked, feeling her residual warmth as she lined up the products for them. “Okay, so we start with the toner pad.” She gently pushed him to lean back in the chair, her face coming closer to his as she delicately swiped it over his cheeks and nose. He was getting an up close look at her, noticing the scar near her eyebrow and a few spots on her face. It made him warm up a bit, being able to see her so close when she was awake. Usually this level of observation was reserved for when she was asleep. “Oi, keep your head up.” 

“Sorry.” He laughed, avoiding the impulse to move the chair back and forth. He liked to swing on it at times. 

“Wait- how about this.” Without giving it much thought, she gripped the chair and swung it over to turn his body to the side, helping herself to straddle his lap. “This seems a little easier, no?” Fingers gently tipped his chin up, eyes focused on her motions. 

Harry’s breath had disappeared. No longer available, he felt her sitting on top of his thighs, innocent as ever as she went through the motions. Tender with her movements and pressure, she was treating him like porcelain while giving him a little makeover. He should be focused on how nice the products felt on his skin, but his mind was elsewhere. 

She smelled amazing, as usual, but having it this close up was a little hard for him. Yes, she sat on his lap before- but not in his shirt, with her thighs on display and tiny little shorts. She didn’t straddle him before either, didn’t let his mind wander to places it shouldn’t. All his energy was focused on trying to ensure she didn’t feel the stiffy that was quickly growing in his pants. 

“I can’t believe how good you’re being for me, H.” She whispered. “No whining or anything.” Her smile was soft as she wiped the serum over his face. “You’re so pretty.”

Fuck. He swallowed thickly, trying desperately to not let his cock construe those words into the filthy praise kink he had, but it appeared to be a bit too late for that. She had no idea what she was doing to him and he didn’t want to be a perv, but god damn. If the girl continued, there would be no denying that he’d cream his damn pants. Being pet on, feeling her brush his hair off his forehead while she stroked his face and adjusted his position to where she wanted… He was only so strong. “Thanks.” He murmured, trying to keep his composure. 

“Of course.” She beamed, seeming pleased. “I’m surprised you’re letting me do this, but you’re full of surprises.” It seemed like she didn’t know the battle he was facing internally, which was his goal, but that was soon to be ruined. “Hold on a second.” Shifting slightly on his lap, she stood up momentarily before sliding further up. “Sorry, I was falling down a bit-” 

Harry hadn’t meant to, he really fucking didn’t. But she sat right on top of him, squirming a bit. Giving his dick a bit of friction, making his hands grip her hips and sit her down hard to stop the movement. He couldn’t open his eyes, couldn’t face her as he heard the hitch in her breath. “Fuck, I’m sorry. Sorry, I didn’t- I promise m’not being a creep or anything.” He winced. “Just been a while and uh-” 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Her voice rang out, fingers brushing through his hair. “H, look at me. I’m not mad.” Of course, her words were sweet and syrupy, going right to his dick yet again. Y/N had no fucking idea how much she effected him, how many times he’d thought about her in this positon and how guilty he felt that he’d turned a sweet moment into something like this. “C’mon. You don’t need to be embarrassed.” 

He took a moment before opening his eyes, looking at her face. Studying it, making sure she wasn’t uncomfortable. Her hand cupped the side of his face, a slight pout on her pretty lips. Y/N didn’t seem upset about it, seeing as she sat still and could most definitely feel his cock under her. He could feel her cunt over him, hot through the fabric and he was doing everything in his power to be fucking normal. 

“There you are.” The tables had finally turned. Harry was the shy one in this moment and Y/N was the one seemingly not freaked out. “It’s a natural body function, H. I know you’re not some kind of perv. I sat on your lap, remember?” She soothed his nerves. “Besides, I’m flattered. Was beginning to think you thought I was some kind of troll or something.” The smile kicked up on her face, but his frown deepened.

“The fuck? Why would you think that?” Brows furrowed, he didn’t like that she thought he didn’t find her attractive. He called her pretty quite a bit. 

“Well, I’m not your type. You go for all those tattooed girls with the bad ass attitudes, which is cool cause I think they’re hot too but… I’m all soft and squishy, y’know? I like the soft things, kinda the opposite of you so I just thought I wasn’t someone you’d be attracted to. M’nothing like what you go for.” She didn’t seem offended by this, rather stating it matter of fact- but Harry couldn’t believe how wrong she was. He had to wonder how long she thought this. 

While he was secretly pining after her, she was thinking he was going off to get blowies by the girls that flirted with him which, sometimes he did. At the beginning of their friendship, he tried to stave off those feelings for her by getting someone else underneath him, fucking away the frustration but he learned fairly quickly that none of it did much when his mind was on someone else. It’d been months at this point. Sure, he liked a bit of flirting to boost his ego, but that was only when Y/N was preoccupied. 

“Well, you’re wrong.” He said sternly. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Dunno where the troll idea came in when m’always staring at you.” He scoffed. “No more of that bullshit. Wouldn’t be hard if I didn’t think you were stunning. Trust me.” In fact, she was the only thing that got him hard these days. Thinking of her mouth, her thighs, her tits, her ass, anything. Even her hands, for fucks sake. “Don’t ever doubt how beautiful you are t’me. Pisses me off.”

“Sorry.” She bleated, pouting back at him. “I didn’t mean to. It’s just.. You call me pretty but I never would have thought you meant it like that. I like that you let me cuddle you and stuff so obviously I know you aren’t repulsed by me but, I dunno.” She swallowed, looking down at his bare chest. “I’m sorry for getting you… if you’re uncomfortable.” 

God, he was mucking this up wasn’t he? He shook his head, letting his thumbs rub over her hips as he softened his face. “No, sweets. Don’t apologize. S’not a big deal, I’m not mad at you. Just don’t like the idea of you thinking poorly of yourself. You’re fucking stunning.” So stunning that his cock was still hard under her. “I’ll go take care of it when we’re done, but no more squirming. Okay?” Squeezing her, he tried to rectify the situation. “No more fussing.” 

“But…” Y/N’s lips twisted slightly, sliding her hands down to his shoulders. “That’s not fair.” 

Harry blinked a few times, looking her over hesitantly. “What d’you mean? I’m okay, pet.” 

“Well, It’s my fault that you’re like this.” She protested. “I can fix it, if you want. Haven’t given too many blowies before, but I can take instruction pretty well.”

Harry truly thought he was dreaming for a moment, his face hot as she gave him an innocent look. Like she meant it, though it slightly embarrassed her for not having a lot of experience. But feeling her shift on him clued him back into reality. This was real. “You- You don’t have to do anything for me, Y/N.” He was holding on by a string. “You didn’t mean to do it. It’s not your responsibility to get me off just because my cock’s got a mind of his own.”

Y/N huffed again, shaking her head. “I want to. Can I?” Her face shifted slightly. “You’re not making me do anything. It would make me feel better If i could take care of you.” Her eyes met his. “I mean it. Promise.” 

And god, if Harry was a stronger man he’d lift her off his lap and insist on taking care of it himself. He’d explain that it could make lines blurry and he liked her a bit more than a friend and they’d have that talk. But he wasn’t a stronger man, and she rolled her hips on him again with a hum, making his head fall back when she repeated the action. “Fuck.” He whispered under his breath. “As long as.. As long you’re sure. I don’t want you to regret it or anything.” 

“I won’t.” She peeped. “I like making you feel good, Harry.” Her face seemed brighter as she watched him nod.

“Go on then, sweetheart.” He sighed. “I’ll show you what I like.” 

Never in a million years had he expected her to be visibly excited, slipping off his lap and on to her knees in front of him. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Eyes looked up at him with curiosity, hands running over his thighs as she waited for direction. He’d dreamt of this so many times, stroked off in the bathroom to this very mental image to get his load out quicker. His cock pulsed inside his sweats. This was really happening. “M’not wearing briefs under these.” He warned, pushing the waistband down as he slowly tugged himself out of the pants. His hand was slightly shaky ass he gave himself a squeeze at the base, a soft hiss leaving his teeth when her hand covered his own. 

“I’ve only done it a few times but…” Her eyes widened. “Yours is the prettiest I’ve seen.”

And fuck if that didn’t get him going. Harry took pride in his dick, as a lot of men did, but to get that compliment was better than anything else. His hair was normally trimmed shorter, but it had been a while. It was groomed a bit at the base, his happy trail leading up his stomach. “Thank you.” He mumbled, removing his hand and letting hers take over. Y/N was eager and that much was obvious, feeling her give him a few strokes as she shuffled closer in between his spread thighs. “I- I probably won’t last long. I wasn’t lying, it’s been a while.” And he’d imagined her in this position so many times that he was programmed to get off to it quickly. 

“That’s okay. You’re quite big so it’ll be better for my jaw.” She giggled. Fucking giggled while her thumb rubbed over the slit, making him shudder. He’d always imagined she’d be much more shy in this situation, but again he was proven wrong. “What do you like?” 

Honestly? He could cum just like this. Her stroking him slow, looking up at him with that pretty little face. Splatter her pretty face with pearly strings leaking from the slit of his cock, let it drip down her cheeks and chin. But she wouldn’t like that answer. “I’m okay with anything you give me, but I… I like to hear you.” He swallowed, a shaky exhale leaving his nose. “And uh, a bit wet. If that’s something you’d like.” 

Y/N looked like she was taking note, nodding at his words. “I want to know what you like, m’okay with anything.” She smiled. “I knew you had to be big cause.. Y’know you’ve got the energy. And I’ve felt it a few times when we cuddle, before you wake up. It’s just different to see it.” Y/N leaned her head on his thigh, continuing to jerk him off. “I’ll probably choke a little bit, cause you’re the biggest I’ve taken. It’s okay though, I’ll be fine. I’ll pinch your tummy or somthin’ if I need a second to breathe.” 

Who the fuck was she? Y/N had never, ever shown or hinted at being filthy in her life, but here she was. Talking about choking on his cock. He throbbed in her hand, making her eyebrows raise. “You liked that. Noted.” Leaning forward, she kept eye contact with him as she dragged her pink tongue from the base up to the tip, letting it sit there for a moment before she pulled away, giving him a few more strokes. “You can show me what you like too. Don’t be shy about it, H. I want you to feel good.” 

Harry nearly lost it as he watched those gorgeous lips purse, spitting right over the tip. It slipped down his length before her hand caught it, stroking and spreading it over his cock. Filthy, filthy things filled his tongue immediately, but he tried to pace himself. “Fuck me…” He whispered, gently gathering her hair in his hand. “I didn’t know you had this in you, gorgeous.” It nearly bowled him over. “Can you.. Take it in your mouth. Suck the tip for me. I want to see that.” 

Normally, he had no problem being a cocky, arrogant man. He was dominant most of the time with his hook ups- but Y/N wasn’t just a hook up to him. She was special. He didn’t want to do a single thing to potentially fuck this up. He wanted her to like this, to see how much he liked it too. She had no problems following instructions, the man watching as her lips stretched around the tip and dipped down a bit as she suckled on it. A soft hum left her mouth and vibrated over him as he curled the hair around his fist, making him groan. “Yeah, jus’ like that, angel. Fuck.” He kept his eyes on her as she bobbed shallowly, taking moments to rub her tongue over his leaking slit. “You’re so good, so sweet t’me. Can’t believe you’re doin’ this.” 

Y/N pulled off the tip, lips wet as she peered up at him. “I’ve thought about it before.” She whispered, lapping over the side of his length. “Wanted to see your cock. I knew it’d be pretty.” 

What the fuck? Harry’s brian felt fried, completely caught off guard by this information. Sure, he had thought maybe once or twice she was teasing him but it wasn’t often. Y/N was just so sugary sweet and kind, a slight air of innocence, and… Now she was telling him she’d thought about sucking him off before. “You have?” 

“Mhm.” She stroked him a bit firmer, the slick sound of her hand around his wet cock getting louder. “I heard.. Heard rumors and felt left out. You like me the best but you never asked me to do anything.” Rubbing the tip over her pouted lips, Harry was shocked yet again. 

“Cause y’mean more to me than any of the other people.” He swallowed. “Too fuckin’ sweet. I like you the best, you’re right but.. You’re my sweet girl. Didn’t want t’use you for anything like that. Would break my heart if I hurt you and you’d not want to see me again.” 

“What if I wanted you to use me?” She asked, peering up at him with those eyes. They drove him absolutely mad. “I know you wouldn’t hurt me unless I asked, H. You’re so good to me… I just want to be good for you too.” Taking the tip back into her mouth, she pushed herself down further and he felt his stomach clench. It took him off guard, feeling the hot mouth take him down and bob herself against him, a soft hum vibrating over him. 

“Oh- Fuck.” He let out a broken groan, leaning further back into the chair. “You are, baby, you fucking are. Hot little mouth… shit.” She whimpered around his cock at his words, sucking a little harder as her hand stroked the rest of him. She liked that. “What is it, hm? Like when I call you baby? When I tell you how perfect you are?” His words got a bit darker. He was slipping into another headspace and Y/N seemed to be coaxing it on. 

She did a half ass nod, not pulling off his length as she continued. Harry wouldn’t have guessed in a million years that she’d be a greedy girl like this, but he was incredibly thankful that she was. “You are. Such a good girl, so gorgeous with your mouth stretched around my cock. Didn’t know you were gagging for it, baby. Should’ve told me.” He chuckled darkly. “Wouldn’t have wasted my loads in the shower before comin’ t’bed with you. Could’ve pushed into your needy mouth and let you swallow it down.” 

Y/N moaned around his prick, eyes watering slightly as she looked at him. He’d never seen a better sight. “You’re so beautiful, angel. So pretty. Didn’t know such a filthy thing could have you lookin’ even more beautiful.” His throat felt thick as his cock throbbed in her mouth. “Fuck, you don’t even know how many times I’ve thought about it.”

Y/N pulled off, panting slightly as webs of saliva connected her mouth to his cock. “How much?” Her voice was a little hoarse, but he could hear that she was desperate to know. “You- You could have. I don’t want you to waste it anymore.” There was the tiny bit of shyness coming back in. “If umm, if you think  I’m good enough at this. I’ll do it.” 

“Fuck me, baby.” His thumb wiped over her spit soaked lips, breaking the threads of spit as he caressed her cheek. “All the fucking time. S’the only thing that gets me off.” Confessions he hadn’t thought he’d be saying so soon, let alone before he’d ever kissed her, spilled from him. “You’re doing amazing. More than good enough, too fucking good for me.” He couldn’t believe she was offering. “You sure you want t’be the one to take care of it?”

“Yes, I want it. I don’t want anyone else to do it.” She pleaded. “I’ll be the best for you. Just- you can tell me and I’ll suck you or, or anything you want.” Harry tested it, gently pushing her head back towards his prick- which she immediately took back in her mouth. The perfect, wet heat bringing him back to that filthy place in his head. 

How could she think he could ever say no? She’d been his weakness since she brought him over that damn cupcake. 

“Oh, sweet girl. Anything?” He cooed. “Dangerous thing to promise me. Don’t want anyone else to do it either.” His breathing was getting harder, trying not to thrust his hips up into her mouth and make her take it all. Sure, she’d probably do it, but he still felt the need to be delicate with her. “Take a little more for me, baby. Just like- there, there you go.” He praised, mouth falling open as she did exactly what he wanted. “Gonna make me cum.” 

This felt a million times better than rubbing one out in her bathroom. His legs were near vibrating, the wet sound of her mouth taking him down and the clicks of her hand stroking his spit soaked cock filling her bedroom. This was the last thing he’d expected was her on her knees for him tonight and part of him wasn’t convinced it wasn’t a wet dream, but he was thanking whatever higher power that was up there that his sweet girl had a dirty side to her. One he wanted to be the only one privileged enough to see. 

“In my mouth.” She gasped, pulling up for a moment. “Want to taste you. Please?” 

How could he ever tell her no? 

Pushing her back down on his cock, he let his hips rise up and shallowly thrust into her mouth as she moaned around him, drooling down her chin and letting him use her the way he needed to get off. The best part was knowing she was enjoying it so much. It was a miracle he’d lasted this long already, but he attributed that to shock. She was dirty, his sweet girl, choking slightly on his cock as the tip hit her throat, but she made no move to want to stop. 

His last straw, though, was feeling her hand over his balls, whining around him as he let out his deepest groan yet. It was sloppy and messy and so fucking good that he felt lightheaded, tummy hot and legs weak as he felt himself approach his end. “Fuck, jus’ like that, your fucking mouth is perfect… fuck, fuck, fuck, baby- M’gonna cum, gonna cum, gonna-” His voice failed as his head fell back, lifting his hips as his cum began to pour into her mouth. Ribbon after ribbon coating her throat, pulling back a bit to get it on her tongue while she worked him through it. 

He didn’t realize he had so much in him, but perhaps it was just Y/N that made him cum this much. This hard. His ears rung a bit, curses leaving his mouth as he watched her mouth open and hand stroke him to see the pearly mess on her tongue. At the last little bit,he used his grip on her hair to tug her up to his face. 

“C’mere, sweet girl. Share with me, don’t be greedy.” holding her face while the other had her hair, he pulled back into his lap and her mouth to his and groaned as she licked over his tongue, sharing the remnants of his load with him. It was something a bit nasty and deprived, he knew, but Y/N merely moaned back, her clean hand curling around the back of his neck. 

The kisses slowed from frantic and hot, to softer, slow and sweet. Pecking her lips over and over again, her whimpers melted into giggled as he untangled from her hair, sliding his hand under the shirt she had on to get some bare skin on his fingertips. “Sweetest thing, most beautiful girl.” He murmured between kisses. “Thank you. Best I’ve ever had.” 

“You’re jus’ saying that.” She whispered, though the smile was difficult to wipe off her face. Obviously she liked praise just as much as him. 

“Nope. Mean every word.” He confirmed, rubbing his nose over her cheek. “Thank you, baby. Felt so damn good, can’t feel my legs now.” Harry’d never felt like this after a blowie, both in his legs and the fondness he felt for the girl. If there had been any doubts about his feelings for her whatsoever, they were shattered. He was so far gone for her, it was pathetic. 

“Good.” She smiled, feeling the kiss to his cheek. “I need to finish your skincare, though. So tuck yourself back in, cause m’gonna do that and then brush my teeth again. Though.. I can tell you’ve got a good diet. Tasted nice.” 

Though Harry knew cum never really tasted good, he was chuffed that she hadn’t minded. Even more, that she hadn’t minded indulging in sharing with him. “M’not selfish, I need to help you too.” He reminded, though she merely shook her head. 

“I’ll take a raincheck. M’so tired now, and I want to enjoy it fully.” Pecking his cheek in return, she picked up the moisturizer. “Think you need a lip mask too. Thankfully, you’re in the right hands.” 

Harry was sometimes a selfish lover with hookups and he could admit that, but with Y/N he never wanted to be that way. He wanted to make her feel good, but he could wait. It only made him anticipate it more- there would be a next time. 

“Okay, sweets.” He chuckled. “Do whatever you’d like.”

[violetarks]

“baby keep talking, but nobody’s listening!”

anime: jujutsu kaisen

characters: gojo satoru, choso, fushiguro toji

summary: they find you on a date with someone they've never seen before, but they don't need to look for long to see how bored you were. deciding for you that it would be the first and only date you ever went on with that man, they come to your rescue.

warnings: afab! reader, she/her pronouns used, reader is on a date with a man, said date sucks ass (trying to regulate what y/n eats, snarky comments, egotistical, rude to hospitality workers), shoko/itadori/shiu help set you up on a date but they suck at it

↣ gojo satoru

"satoru, you have to get out," you huff at him, crossed arms over your chest. he sat on your cough, flicking through tv channels. "my date is coming here in ten minutes!"

"you mean the stranger that shoko met at the mall and said would 'totally be your type'?" he says, looking over his shoulder to you. you raise a brow. "c'mon, blow him off. we need to finish 'the last of us'!"

"don't you dare watch it while i'm gone, satoru, or god so help me—" your phone rings, interrupting your threat. you answer when you see the number of your date. "hello? oh, yes, this is y/n."

you begin to walk to grab your keys and your bag, satoru following after you when you suddenly stop.

"oh, uh... you want to meet there?" you say, tilting your head, "no, that's fine, i'll leave now. see you—..."

"he's not coming to pick you up?" satoru questions, watching as you take out your car keys.

"he's actually already there. and he's ordered for me." you say with a bit of doubt in your voice. satoru can hear it. "it's fine, i should go now. don't you dare watch that show, i will kill you. see you, satoru."

the whole time you're gone, he can’t do anything. he’s sitting in silence for an hour, not even looking at his phone. he felt angry at himself.

so he followed you, obviously.

he looked up the restaurant you had mentioned to him before and saw the pictures posted online. it looked like such a nice first date place. and that boiled even more jealousy in him. of course he had to follow you.

and luckily he did; you looked miserable.

he takes out his phone as soon as possible.

“you know how many calories are in that meal?” your date said after the waiter left your table, “way better for you than what you wanted.”

you had just told him your favourite dish in the menu. and he told you he ordered you just a salad. while he got two meals because he was ‘bulking’.

when shoko showed you his instagram, you had to admit that he was cute. he was fit too, and you did your fair share of exercise. he had a nice smile and he also posted photos of his dog. but that couldn’t shield you from what was right in front of you.

you found out he was a model for a magazine you’ve never heard of, and while that was impressive, it was his whole personality. you asked about his pet, and he somehow turned it back to his career and how he did a fireman themed calendar last year. you’d think he was surely more than that, but it didn’t seem it. you had barely talked about yourself. it didn’t look like he was interested anyway.

“hm, what did i do today?” he thought out. you cringed at the way he tapped his chin, pretending to think. “i hit the gym at 5am, walked my pet for an hour and a half, took some photos for my resume since i’ve got a new deal coming up, and spent time from then to now just at the studio.”

you were waiting for him to ask about your day. he doesn’t.

“and you know, i’m actually the most valued model at my studio. they always call me for shoots, i’m always first on their list. you’d think i could catch a break every so often,” he chuckles out, rubbing up and down his arms. you hold back from rolling your eyes as you sip your water. “but it’s hard being so… handsome.”

you stare at him and fight the urge to roll your eyes once again.

"what about you?" the moment you've waited for comes a little too late. you're not even interested in speaking about yourself.

"well, i did some grocery shopping this morning—"

"what did you buy?"

"me and my friends are having a movie tomorrow, so i just bought some snacks for us," you explained for some reason, "chocolates, popcorn, chips—"

"junk food?" he scoffs back, "no, no, you don't need all that. you oughta' bring it back and get some fruit. way better for you."

you down the rest of your alcoholic drink you had ordered (the one thing he did let you choose) and look away.

that is when you feel a hand rest on your upper back.

"excuse me, ma'am," you look up and widen your eyes when you see satoru standing before you. he's wearing a white button-up, black slacks, dress shoes and a black waist apron. you freeze up. "the gentleman over there asked me to give you this, already paid for."

you look over to where he was pointing. nanami sits in his own suit as he waves his hand at you, pained smile. satoru places a mojito in front of you. your date stands up.

"the hell? doesn't he see that i'm here?" he scoffs as he stands up. his chair screeches against the floor, which collects everyone's attention in the restaurant. "he's insulting me! what a prick! i'm gonna fuck him up!"

"hey!" you stand up as he begins trudging over. satoru places a hand on your shoulder to stop you, and you see nanami roll his eyes and stand up as well, ready for the fight. "what are you two doing here? and why are you dressed like that?"

"i'm the ultimate undercover agent, of course," he replies. he begins pulling off his apron and dropping it on your seat. he hooks his arm with yours and smiles. "let's get outta' here."

"but my date—"

"he's fine," you watch as nanami dodges one of his punches with and irritated face. "nanami will take care of him."

you let him whisk you out of the restaurant while everyone is watching the two men fight (not really). satoru walks you to his car and starts the engine. you see nanami's car behind his.

"did you seriously bring him along to get me out of that date?" you chuckle as you stare at him. satoru purses his lips and looks away. "thank you, satoru. you didn't have to."

"you're welcome, gorgeous," he responds to you, "i could tell from the phone call that he wasn't all that. wonder what barrel they fished him out of."

you let out a small sigh and look out the window. you were embarrassed; this was the first date you've ever been set up on, and it went horribly. you knew you should've left earlier, not wait until satoru came along. he was your saviour for today, you had to admit.

but what was even worse, you seemingly let than man talk to you like that. you could chalk it up to just being friendly and giving him the best benefit of the doubt, but deep down you know you would never have let that slide with people you know. hell, yaga could speak to you that way and you would still give him an earful.

"don't be sad, y/n, now we can go to yours and watch our show," satoru attempts to cheer you up. he flashes you a smile. "i promise, i won't eat all your food."

"you're a liar, satoru." you laugh back.

"seriously though, that guy was a wreck. why did he keep talking about calories and stuff?" he mumbles out with a disapproving shake of his head, "i had to shut him up somehow. i should've just spilt the drink over him."

"oh god, what about the food? i didn't pay for my meal."

"you mean the salad you didn't want? i cancelled it for ya'."

"why aren't you this nice all the time? you usually bully me." you claim in a joking matter. satoru pouts at you. "i appreciate this, a lot. i guess guys who only ever think about themselves aren't my type."

there's a quietness in the car as he turns on his indicator. you enjoy the little noise coming from the radio, a song that you've heard quite a lot.

"you know, yuuji, nobara and megumi?" he clears his throat.

"yeah?" you respond to him in confusion.

"yeah," he hums with a nod of his head, "i think 'bout them a lot. they're good kids."

"they are," you agree with him. it takes you a few seconds before you look at him again. "satoru, that's not what i meant."

"so am i your type?"

"oh my god."

"answer the question, y/n."

↣ choso

"yuuji?"

"yeah?"

"do you know who this is?" choso shoves his phone into his brother's face.

"uh, that's y/n." yuuji responds in a bit of confusion. the two of them were sitting in a new restaurant with ramen on their tables. choso’s sat nearly untouched for the past ten minutes as he flicked through some pictures you sent to a groupchat with him in it. yuuji was halfway through chewing noodles when choso asked him about the photo you sent a few minutes ago. “why? she looks good.”

“no doubt,” choso mutters in response as he zooms in on the other figure in the picture you took of your reflections in the window, “i mean him.”

“oh, that’s the guy who me, nobara and y/n saw last week at the movies,” yuuji responds, “he asked y/n for her number, so i think they’re out together right now.”

he looks at yuuji in disbelief as the pink-haired boy starts slurping on the soup. it takes him a few seconds to properly react.

“are you serious?” choso says a little loudly. people turn to stare at the pair. “you let him get her number?”

“what? he seemed cool and y/n didn’t seem to mind that i gave it to him.” yuuji holds his hands up in defense as choso angrily glares at the photos on his phone screen. “you said you weren’t gonna’ make a move on her anyway!”

“that doesn’t—” a groan leaves his lips as choso holds his head. he lets in a deep breath. “okay, it’s fine.”

“i’m sorry, choso.”

“no, it’s my fault, i did say i wasn’t going to ask her out,” he tells yuuji, who slowly goes back to eating, “i… i missed out, i guess.”

yuuji frowns as the guy in front of him sadly eats his food.

“you know…” he begins with a small smile. choso looks up to him. “they’re just out for lunch nearby. y/n told me where they were going. we could—”

“yuuji! hurry up!” choso has grabbed his jacket and is rushing to the door before yuuji can reply, “we might miss them!”

yuuji scurries out of restaurant after he gobbles down his ramen. it isn’t too far of a drive, actually. it took about 15 minutes to get there and choso had easily spotted your car in front of a cozy cafe. he parks next to it and almost ducks when be notices you in the chair facing the window, facing the two of them, with your date sitting in the booth — your favourite spot. choso always let you sit in the booth side.

choso clutched onto the steering wheel with gritted teeth. yuuji looked towards you to get a better view.

“huh… she looks annoyed.” yuuji points out.

“this guy…” choso grunts.

inside the cafe, you had taken a few photos of your food and your drink. you’re glad yuuji suggested this place, you loved the service and the food here. the servers were always so nice and helpful and quick, and the food was amazing too.

it was obvious to you that your date didn’t think the same.

“god, everything in here is so…” he begins as he examines the design on his waffles. he cringes a little. “girly.”

“it’s just a bunny design,” you point out as you sadly stir the cat-shaped foam into your hot drink, “it’s cute.”

“it’s embarrassing,” he reiterates. you purse your lips and sip your drink. the delicious taste was enough to make you forget his sour tone. until he speaks up again. “can’t believe your friend told us to go here.”

“i love this cafe,” you state, “everyone here is so nice.”

“the service is slow and they gave me the blueberry waffles instead of the normal ones like i said,” he complains. you set your drink down and hold back from rolling your eyes. “i don’t care how busy you are, you always check five times that the order is correct.”

you don’t even reply to him after that, only trying to enjoy your meal that you paid for. he wasn't helping at all. you thought that because he was so charismatic when talking to yuuji that he was probably a good catch, but you couldn't have been more wrong. maybe he was just putting up a front in order to score you. you really shouldn't judge a book by its cover anymore.

"hey. over here," he begins to snap his fingers and nodding at a server with four full plates of food. the guy looks over frantically, obviously under pressure. "i wanna' ask you something."

"ah, right, give me a second, sir—" the guy was trying to distribute the food with the customers who he was serving.

"i told you, slow service," your date scowls towards you. could you be any more embarrassed right now? the server finishes off his task before coming over to you two. before he can even ask, your date is holding up a nearly empty cup of coffee. "this is the most bitter coffee i have ever had in my whole entire life."

"oh, well, you ordered an americano, sir," the poor server explains, "they tend to be bitter."

"what? no, no, no," the guy in the booth starts shaking his head, "i ordered a flat white."

"you..." the server begins. he was the one who had taken your order too.

"you ordered the americano, actually," you pointed out. the guy raised a brow at you, unamused. "it's okay, you can just order a flat white—"

"god, i did not order an americano." he claims.

but you distinctly remember him saying 'americano' for his drink. and the server repeated the order back to him before it was confirmed annoyedly. you stare down at his nearly empty cup.

"y'know what? just put the flat white on the tab, i will pay for it." you sigh out as you rub your neck.

your date looks more pissed off as the server leaves.

"he was wrong, you don't have to pay for another drink." he mutters out.

"it's nothing, don't worry." you retort and stare back down at your food. you didn't have an appetite anymore and a few minutes pass in silence.

the flat white comes out after such a long time of waiting. your date drinks it quietly, but you notice that he makes a face to show he doesn't like it. you quickly excuse yourself to go and pay at the counter for your food (he insisted on splitting the bill since he didn't like the place) so that you don't have to hear him bicker about it.

"hey," you turn behind you to see choso standing there in a baggy hoodie, a bit nervous, "fancy seeing you here..."

your eyes flicker to outside, where you see yuuji waving at you from choso's car. a smile lands on your face.

"nice to see you, choso," you mutter back as you fish out your wallet. the cashier rings up your total and you press your card to the reader. "how was your lunch with yuuji?"

"good. we cut it short to save you," he bluntly says. you blink as he glares at your date. "i don't like the guy you're with."

"me neither," you sigh out, "i think this is the last time i'll see him. but i gotta' tough it out for the rest of the date."

"you could just leave now." choso adds. he looks at you with furrowed brows.

"ah... i'm not that confident—"

"a takeaway box and takeaway cup, please," choso asks the cashier. she had been sitting there and silently agreeing with you that the guy you were sitting with was a total jerk. "thank you."

he places them in your hands and pushes you gently towards the table.

"who the hell is this guy?" your date scoffs and glares at choso, who does the same back.

"look, i'm not really having a good time on this date," you say as you play with the takeaway boxes. choso hastily takes them from you and fills it with your food in an organised matter. "i think this is the farthest we go. please enjoy the rest of your food, though."

"you serious? ditching me for some jackass?" he accusingly points at choso who wears a shit-eating grin on his face. "this is bullshit!"

"calm down, god..." you groan and rub your temple, "i just don't like you, you're so rude."

"me? you're the one who dragged me to this shithole!"

"shut your mouth before i drop you right now," choso scowls as he pushes the guy back into the booth seat. everyone was watching now, quietly thanking choso for showing up and dealing with him. "grow up, man. you act like a child."

choso grabs your hand and tugs you out of the cafe. you both thank the service with your takeaway in hand. yuuji gets out of the car with a wide smile once you two get closer.

"so, how did it go?" he asks with wide eyes.

you throw your keys at his chest.

"you're driving my car back to my apartment as punishment for setting me up with that asshole," you say with a small frown. you all knew you didn't really blame him, though. "never giving my number out to anyone ever again."

yuuji apologises thoroughly before getting into your car and driving off in the wrong direction. choso opens your door and gives you the food. once he's inside the car himself, he starts it up and begins driving.

you rest a hand over choso's on the middle console.

"thanks, choso," you sigh out, "i should've done that earlier."

"it's fine, y/n, i just wished i came sooner." he replies.

you stare at the side of his face, how irritated he looked just thinking about your date. a smile settles onto your lips and you brush your thumb over his knuckles. he falters and looks back to you for a second before muttering a 'what'.

"i'll take you out for dinner as a thank you," you state, which makes his ears go red, "you're a sweetheart, choso."

"i... uh, yeah, i'll go out with you," he mutters, "thanks..."

the laugh you let out is worth ruining thousands of your dates.

↣ fushiguro toji

"have you ever been to france?" the conceited finance guy in front of you asks, fixing his tie. he wears this smirk on his face that proves that he just knows how rich he was. he wasn't coy at all. you force a smile and shake your head slowly, trying to enjoy your meal at least. "really? that's a shame. i've been plenty of times before, and i've gotta say, the best part is..."

you begin to zone out, sighing to yourself as you move your pasta around on your plate haphazardly. he had chosen such a nice italian restaurant to absolutely ruin your perception of this guy after the first ten minutes of talking to him. you look to your watch, showing it had been only two hours since your date started.

cursing out shiu in your head, you cautiously look out the window to the sky. it wasn't that dark yet, but it felt like your night had been taken away. your mind wanders to yesterday to your conversation with shiu.

shoe

you're getting picked up at 5 tomorrow

y/n

am or pm?

shoe

???

shoe

don't show him how stupid you are, he's a rich guy. maybe he'll bring you to a yacht

y/n

why would i want to be on a yacht for our first date? is he nice?

shoe

he's rich, y/n. that's all that matters.

sometimes, you wonder how he managed to meet all these people. but then you remember that assholes attract assholes. they move together in flocks.

you stare at your red wine and tap your finger on your cheek.

"what do you think about it?" he questions, getting your attention again. you look up to see his smug face. did he really want to know?

"oh, me?" you asks, sitting up straight. you had no idea what he had been saying for the past 15 minutes.

"well, who else would i be talking to, silly?" he says in this mocking tone.

'yourself, it's who you've been talking to all night', you internally say. you had wasted such a nice outfit too. it was such a shame.

"mmm, well, it's a bit—" you begin, only to get interrupted.

"it's insane, isn't it? how could you lose so much money in only a year?" he barks out a laugh, as obnoxious as he was. the table shakes as he bangs his fist against it, waiters and guests looking towards you two. "it's absolutely preposterous! i would never make such a decision like that."

you chew out an awkward laugh before turning to your wine, sipping it.

unknowingly to you, toji was waiting in the car outside the building, getting a good view of you and your new date. he cursed shiu in a huff; not only did he set you up with someone, but the guy was a total prick. he couldn't have done a worse job, and he was broke. he pulled his seat back, watching him with pointed eyes. that guy's mouth hadn't stopped moving ever since you entered the restaurant.

and you? you looked gorgeous, your dress hugged you just right, so much so that he was jealous. toji knows it should've been him to go and take you somewhere like this.

he snaps when the guy calls the waiter over, complaining about his half-eaten food and causing a scene. you looked so uncomfortable. standing up, you excused yourself to the bathroom. and toji is quick to get out of the car.

"he's such an asshole." toji claims as you exit the ladies room. you freeze, pressing out the creases of your dress before walking closer to him at the end of the hall.

"when did you get here?" you ask, hand on your hip, "and how do you know he's an asshole?"

"been watchin' the whole time from the car," he tells you, watching as you widen your eyes and tilt your head at him, "what? couldn't help myself. shiu said you were on a date with some rich guy, 'n i had to see it."

"yeah, well, remind me to kill shiu. he's got the worst taste in men." you sigh out, crossing your arms as you lean against the wall with him. he peers at you. "you know he asked to try every single wine they had before we ordered? and he complained about the merlot not being darker. not only that, he saw my plate and said 'are you gonna' eat all of that?'. the dickhead!"

"that shit looked good." he commented, shaking his head, "who wouldn't finish that food."

"right? ugh, i hate him so much. and he hasn't even asked me about myself other than my name. he explained to me his 'entrepreneurship' and dropshipping. wanted to clock him in the face." you complained more, only fueling toji's own hate for the man.

he lifts himself off the wall, grabbing your arm and dragging you with him. "go 'n get your things. we're gettin' out of here."

"what? what am i supposed to say to him?" you mumble, stumbling behind him, "where are we going?"

"don't say anything to him. if ya' feel bad, pay for your own food." he explains to you, hand moving to rest on your back, "i'm not lettin' you waste that pretty little dress on someone like that guy."

you stare at the back of his head before falling into step with him, stopping at the table with your date. he does a double take once he sees toji, slowly standing up.

"who's he?" he asks, scanning him up and down.

"none of your business." toji retorts, looking down at him.

you begin to grab your purse when he holds out his hand to you. "where the hell are you going?" your date asks you.

"here. for my food." you say, handing him a fifty. the note flutters onto the table in front of him, which he stares at in awe. tugging on your jacket, you stare back at him with furrowed brows. "good luck in life."

with that, you turn around and begin to walk to the exit. behind you, toji sticks his tongue out at the other man and follows after. his hand finds your back once more and you wait to cross the road, sighing out to him, "thank you, toji. saved me."

"no problem." he replies, opening the door for you.

"how did you get in my car?" you ask, sitting in the driver's seat.

"don't ask." he tosses you the keys, making you wonder even more. he gets into the other side, looking back at you. “we’ll hit up that restaurant downtown. the one you always talk about wanting to go to.”

“but you said you don’t like their cuisine.” you claim, starting the car.

“it’s the only place i know that’s fancy.” he explains, looking out the window.

“sweetheart, i wouldn’t say that’s fancy—”

“do you want to go out or not?”

you laugh, reaching out a hand and holding his. he gives a small smile before looking back at you. “thank you, toji.” you say, stopping at a red light. you glance at him, sincere look in your eyes. “it means a lot that you care.”

“jus’ saving you from being stupid as fuck.” he tells you, making you roll your eyes and snatch your hand back, “could ya’ not tell he was a tool when he didn’t knock at your door? motherfucker waited in his car.”

“my god, you’ve been watching since then? toji!” you jokingly reprimand, looking at him for a split second, "i should've known from the start though... he was on his phone the whole time, in the car ride. on bluetooth speaker too."

"i woulda' jumped out the car." he retorts, shaking his head, "we should jump shiu."

"we really should." you laugh, smiling at him, "maybe for our next date."

toji can't help but roll his eyes. he knows deep down that you were hoping shiu was going to set you up with him instead. he can see it on your face, a smile that is pushing through on your lips. you're secretly happy that it was toji who 'ruined' your 'date'.

"i say that because i know you can't pay for dinner."

"did you think i was paying for this one?"

you scoff back, elbowing him, "you leech."

"you know you love me." he says it teasingly, but he knows better than anyone that you actually do.

[dear-ao3]

the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)

Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2

hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long). 

what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.

the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)

and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024

and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!

anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know we’re on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.

but here we are. were back on street circuits. we’re in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go. 

first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now. 

what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness: 

george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt

fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.

we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory. 

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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though

and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.

also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.

he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as “desperate” so this was interesting

charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.

oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc

max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.

we also had the return of daniel ricciardo’s jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago. 

heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:

lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki. 

lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around

george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged

george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something

max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding. 

and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)

and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip

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then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama

haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said “maybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards ‘want to get involved’ no matter the contact.”

in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. we’ve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.

adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where! 

ferrari? no that would be too obvious. 

mercedes? nah

williams? no too much of a shit show

aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show! 

that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025. 

apparently he was offered a “good package” according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power. 

he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari. 

fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.

by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).

lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:

"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."

mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclaren’s indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:

mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical. 

lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekend….

and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."

max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."

and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can. 

a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile. 

but! there is more! 

daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.

which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.

which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off. 

and with that. the baku lore. 

theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events. 

such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:

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they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that

the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully

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and of course. how could we forget. charles’s infamous “i am stupid” radio.

speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls. 

then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks. 

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but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.

some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say “this is not a car” (good thing they have adrian newey now, right? 

franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying. 

also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say. 

but alas. qualifying. 

i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE. 

so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box. 

max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that. 

slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster) 

charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won. 

and franco has never been to baku before. 

i think that's all the exposition that we need here. 

q1 started with max complaining about his car. “the car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axle” he said. despite this he was sitting in p3. 

the mid field battle though….the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice. 

the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando. 

lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault) 

now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag. 

if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader. 

in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.

and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up. 

q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norris’d. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled. 

in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say “he keeps missing the tow” 

and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon. 

max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th. 

and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race. 

steaming on forward to q3. 

we had, for review, in q3 the following: 

both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri. 

right out the gate it was wild. 

“red bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!” karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment. 

everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer. 

here were the standings: 

charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando

and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-

wait a second what is that

could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!

oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk

meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.

and what do you know i have time

so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say

"the williams still has the air box fan in"

"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.

and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:

"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"

alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap. 

franco did tho!

and here were out qualifying results: 

p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex  p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel  p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: esteban 

oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit. 

everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second

onto the race. 

notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.

and so, we head into lap 1.

charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth. 

someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid. 

by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a  spot to nico. 

also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.

and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that “this tire is pretty bad” over the radio. 

yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being. 

franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL. 

lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past. 

george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break. 

on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th. 

and max’s car was not working. to potentially no one’s surprise. “i have zero bite in the car” he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap. 

several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo. 

“mojo seems to be back for checo perez” harry said, correctly. 

mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando. 

and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do? 

they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race. 

remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.

lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits. 

thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo. 

mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!

meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control. 

several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a “good, fair and robust defense,” which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done. 

ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place. 

charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. “they are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than us” he said. 

carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th

this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that “my brakes are not working.” this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.

also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do “everything you can do to get the surface temp down” of the tires. he said “im trying” then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say “are you seeing how i have to drive this thing?” “yes,” bono, his engineer said. “quite effective though.” 

max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not. 

but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was “not good for max’s world champion aspirations.”

this was also when ted very bafflingly said that “if i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on it” im not sure what that was in response to. 

meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working. 

lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando. 

“lando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying ‘zero wheel spin’ in every exit,” lando’s race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too. 

10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:

oscar

+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george  +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban  +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyu 

lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max

at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. “the back markers are starting to come up,” checo’s engineer said to him. “its going to get messy.”

“hold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto it” harry said. harry would turn out to be correct. 

we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and “welcome to the party carlos sainz!” who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.

definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem. 

oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had “no rear tires. no rear tires at all.” 

and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship. 

“verstappen’s day goes from bad to worse,” harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)

meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!! 

but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened. 

what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlos’s helmet after the crash. 

the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.

and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:

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but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car. 

which meant 

OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP

and george inherited p3! 

and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit! 

“yes!” he whispered over the radio. 

he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the “one moment” hand gesture before properly celebrating. 

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he also got driver of the day! 

(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio “i cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leaves”)

gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting. 

george said that the most difficult part of the race was “driving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lap…the vsc should have come out sooner” 

charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice. 

oscar was entirely pleased. “i managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.” and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.

and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!

the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled: 

and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them

(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)

george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium

the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:

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and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran: 

-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management

-alex albon was “super happy, that's a lot of points for us” (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying “I can go, im happy to go” and then waving comically. 

-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season

-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)

-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red

-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters. 

-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)

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-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that “i didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.” he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying “i struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.” he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said “i didn't complain, facts were stated.” and to sum it all up he said that “im executing things well, i’m very quick…i’m not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guy….car is performing well everywhere…some red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right now” 

-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. “pretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so much….its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tires…..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.” 

-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram. 

-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.

-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today! 

-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscar’s wina and lando’s insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now. 

-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren. 

-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast

and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise. 

see you all soon!!!

[lumosinlove]

Write Me In

Part Five

~

His office felt weird. New York felt weird. Even being with Cassie felt weird. Leo was so groggy in his real life that sometimes, when he was washing his face or sitting in a meeting or grabbing a bagel for lunch, he wondered if he had just been sleeping that whole time with Finn and Logan. He wouldn’t put it past himself to dream up something like that. Leave it to him to think making dinner for two of the biggest names in the music industry was a daydream. And the kissing, of course, but he spent far more time thinking about salt water in Finn’s hair and the way Logan looked walking around the markets. It was all smeared gold in his mind. And then there were the dirty dreams which he kept accidentally thinking about in meetings.

The article was going to lead this month’s issue, which meant it would come out right as Finn and Logan started up their tour again. A crew was being sent out to Nice for the cover shoot and Leo had been so jealous when he found out that he’d had to excuse himself from the meeting for a moment. He missed them. He probably scrolled through their messages too much.

The thread started when Leo had settled into a cab and opened the app to text them that he’d landed, only to find an incoming FaceTime call interrupting him. Leo had saved their numbers under their initials—as if that would really fool anyone. So, when Finn’s first FaceTime had popped up, he’d been more than surprised to find difficult little rock star calling him instead, complete with a photo that Finn seemed to have taken himself—him and Logan basking in the sun, hair wet from the ocean and cheeks smushed together.

Leo had answered with, “and what’s Logan saved under then?”

Finn had just grinned and ran off screen—presumably to grab Logan’s phone because a second later, Leo got a text of !! from grumpy<3

Leo figured that was subtle enough to keep. He’d pushed his headphones into his ears and let Finn’s voice fill his head as the city rose up and greeted him in its sunset.

Somehow, without so much as a ripple, talking to them had started feeling like talking to old friends. Once a day. Twice a day. Photographs of their lunches and messy work spaces in between. When Leo received his fist voice memo, he’d had to lock himself in the bathroom at work and breathe a few times before hitting play.

“Hi, Le,” Finn’s voice said. “Okay—we’re writing today. Lo, hello, say hi.”

“Hi, hey,” Logan said, then let out a wicked cough. “Sorry, Finn made me do one of those ginger shots and I’m in hell.”

Leo covered his laugh with his hand.

“Shut up, it’s good for you,” Finn replied. “Okay, anyway. So, this is called—oh, I’m gonna be on the piano. But this is—and I’m gonna try to play it straight through.”

“Stop interrupting yourself,” Logan said, then it sounded like he got closer to Finn’s phone. “It’s called Neon Signs and it’s off of the new album, and we know your editor wanted you to hear one more song for the piece so—ouais. Go, Finn.”

“I was going to say I’m on the piano and on the album it’s also piano. So. There.” He laughed and played a few chords. “Okay. It’s about one of the times when we almost got together, but we didn’t. We were at a bar that we weren’t old enough for.”

“And Finn got us stuck outside because they wouldn’t let us back in,” Logan said.

“Fool them once, and all that,” Finn cut in.

“It was freezing.” Logan’s voice, then a pause. “And I kissed him.”

“Again,” Finn said, laughing. “Anyway, spoilers. Here we go.”

There were a few seconds of dead air. Just Finn breathing. Leo pressed his headphones against his ears and kicked up his volume in time to hear Logan whisper something in French and Finn hush him.

I wanted you to meet me outside.

We’re not old enough to drink, no, not quite.

And leaving this bar means risking getting stuck out in the cold.

But I said ‘follow me’ you said ‘all right.’

Pulling up your hood against the frost bite.

And now that we’re here, there are too many things I want you to know.

But somehow I can tell tonight is not when you’ll be told

That just the look of you beneath that neon sign

Sure is something to behold…

It’s soft and blue…

Like me and you…

Maybe I’ll do this forever,

Only kiss me when it’s snowing.

Cause at least it isn’t never,

Though I can’t see where we’re going.

If only that light from that neon sign

Made you see me

Just as brightly

Oh God

Where’s my,

Neon,

Bar sign?

One that you can read.

Put it over me.

Bathe me in signals and the arrows pointing where I want to lead.

“Oh,” Leo said softly to himself—reacting to the lyrics, but also to Finn’s piano. It was a meandering, sad tune. As if even the music wasn’t sure what its next note would be. The song took them out of winter next and through to summer. Into humidity, and strings lights and patios and dorm rooms, sweltering with the door closed and no AC. A goodbye—was this them going to college? And it was Logan singing. Fall and desperate for something to last. Finn fumbled a little on the piano, cursed softly, and despite the next sad lyric, Leo could hear Logan smiling. Instead walked into my own past. You’re sitting on the bed and I’ve never felt less or more alone.

Leo listened to it four times. It was hypnotizing. Yes, he knew the story. He’d been given the precious task of telling the story—but they were telling it, too.

Meanwhile, the article was going through drafts and drafts. He’d fought hard to keep the section about Logan’s market in. His editor hadn’t seen the relevance, and maybe Leo’s relevance wasn’t entirely music-based, but those markets were in the songs. Maybe not in so many words, but Logan was as gentle as his voice could be when he was there. He stood still in that space, listening to the rhythm and thrum of the people around him.

Sending cover shoot to you without me :/ Leo typed out.

Finn replied almost instantly: I’ll refuse to pose until you arrive.

Then Logan: I will lock them out.

Ha, Leo wrote.

No Ha. It’s my house.

I’m at the office—in the final meeting for the article. He thought for a second, then smiled as he typed out. Everyone’s so happy for you.

You are coming to our first show, Logan typed out, and then a few seconds later, ? accompanied it, as if Finn had forced it out of him.

I’m coming to a show. Not sure when yet, Leo said. I’m on another project and have to finish it up before—

His eye caught on his phone’s clock. Jesus. He’d been in here for ten minutes texting like a teenager between classes. Before what? Before I can come back to you. Before I can come home, before I can come back because I miss you.

The thrill that came from being able to know he missed them because he knew them was strong.

—before I can make it, he finished. Have to go back to meeting now

Finn sent him five rows or pink hearts, Logan said, we miss you, and Leo sat back down in his meeting with a smile on his face that earned him weird looks. Cassie stared at him until someone asked her a question.

~

“Okay, so you’re gonna spill all your beans now.” Cassie jabbed him gently with her fork at lunch. “Like. Right now.”

“I don’t have beans.” Leo tilted his bowl to her. “This is my mama’s chicken salad recipe. Want some?”

Cassie groaned. “Just tell me why you’re grinning at your phone like an idiot every chance you get!”

“I’m not.”

“You are, you are.”

“I’m not, I’m not.”

“Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.” Cassie grabbed onto his arm. “Tell me.”

“I’m excited for them,” Leo said. “That’s all. I’ve always looked up to them, and this is a big deal.

“So we are talking about Finn and Logan?”

Leo froze, caught. “Oh.”

It wasn’t his fault. They filled every little space of his mind. And if there was somewhere they couldn’t reach, they pressed up against that part, all warm and insistent.

Cassie threw her head back and squealed. “Leo. Tell me, tell me—”

“Oh-ho my God, they kissed me.”

Cassie stared at him, voice cutting off. Leo slapped his hands over his own mouth.

“You don’t know that,” Leo said quickly, just as Cassie made a soft, breathy sort of screeching sound.

“Wh-at?” she set her fork down with exaggerated precision. “What did you just say?”

Leo glanced around the courtyard they were in, but they were alone. In the shade, sun dappling down on them, and alone.

“They?” Cassie’s hand on his sleeve twisted the fabric. “They kissed you?”

He hadn’t meant to say a word, but the knowledge was like a fire inside of him. Being wanted like this. Being wanted by them.

Cassie started laughing, surprised and delighted. “Leo.”

“Yeah, they—apparently, um.” Leo shook his head. He didn’t even know how to say this. “They’ve been tracking my career since I just had the blog, and we were out by the fire pit and we almost—but we didn’t. And then we talked and I told them about Jack—sort of.”

Cassie’s blue eyes went wide at that, but she stayed quiet.

“And they sort of got why I was saying no.”

“You said no?”

“At first, at first.” Leo pushed his lunch away and dropped his voice. “Okay, okay, okay, sworn to secrecy.”

She squealed again through a shut mouth and hit him repeatedly in the arm.

“So, Nice,” Leo said. “Logan’s house.”

“Yeah, fuck you, by the way, meant nicely but with jealousy.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But, so that night happened where they made the move a bit—”

“What does that even mean?”

“Mm, hard to explain. They were actually—” Leo’s laugh interrupted his words. “They were so bad at it.”

“Finn O’Hara is bad at making the moves?”

“Only when he means it, apparently.”

Cassie’s waved him on. “Okay, more, I need more.”

“So, we talked it out at the markets.”

“Ah. That’s why you like those sections so much. It’s all coming together.”

“Shut up.”

“And they kissed you there?”

“No,” Leo said. “Logan kissed me, just once, and um…” Leo bit back a grin. “And then later, Finn. Mostly because—I mean we said we’d take it slow and Logan was just keeping that promise, but I may have lost some resolve with Finn because—fuck, because.”

“He’s Finn O’Hara,” Cassie said. “I think ‘fuck, because’ is a fine reason.”

“And that’s when he said they want me to come back once I’m off their project. I mean, I know I have the follow up piece but…then I’ll be done.”

Cassie had her chin in her palm, the way she sometimes did when she was thinking. “Holy shit.”

“Yeah.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.”

She sat up straight. “Both…of them?”

Leo opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. “Honestly, I haven’t been even…feeling strange about that. Is that weird?”

“No,” Cassie said, shaking her head. “I mean, not if it’s working. You’re not, like…jealous?”

“No,” Leo answered. It was the truth. “I know I probably should be.”

“They are basically high school sweethearts,” Cassie said. “Like, this article, the way you describe them…That’s soulmate shit right there. I don’t mean you don’t fit with them, I’m just…”

“I know where you’re coming from, but…” Leo sighed, smiling. “And I went there, too, but it’s just not like that. I like the way they are together. The way they treat each other. I like it as much as I like the way the are with me.”

“Holy shit,” Cassie said, then laughed. “Oh man.” She pushed her lunch aside in favor of pulling her laptop out of her bag. “Holy shit, holy shit, which show do you want? Which show, Le, I want to book that all out right fucking now.”

“It’s one night.”

“Yeah, well, it’s gonna be a hell of a night.”

Leo reached forward and grasped her hand. “Don’t even joke about that with me, I’m a wreck.”

“Yeah, well, you need all the help you can get. You were there for, what, three weeks, and you just kissed?”

“I am—”

“No, I commend you, cowboy, you just have eons more willpower than I do.” She raised her eyebrows at him. “Now, which show?”

Leo had been thinking about it. Of course he’d been thinking about it. He pictured them in different cities. Walking different streets. But, in the end, there was no question. Leo wanted to be where they had figured everything out. Maybe they’d figure out each other, too.

“Italy,” Leo said. “I want Italy.”

~

He was nervous to see them, that was for sure. Cassie always followed through on her work quickly, but Leo felt like he had blinked through being home before he was staring down at an empty suitcase again. Italy. Milan. It would be warm. He’d be there for a week. Something casual for the shows. Something nice for press events. Something comfortable for…mornings? He stared in his underwear drawer for too long. When was the last time he’d had to care what he looked like in his underwear, much less what his underwear looked like. That turned into staring at his t-shirts for too long, only to pick up his Heartthrob O’Hara t-shirtand fold it into his suitcase. Then he sat on the edge of his bed and googled Logan Tremblay t-shirt. They weren’t that good. Grainy photos just plastered on fabric. He typed in Night Swimming lyric t-shirt. There were hundreds, but Leo had fun scrolling. He’d probably added too many things to his cart when he finally found what he was looking for. The shirt was white with four words in forest green on it.

OH MY

GREEN EYES

Leo bit back a smile and ordered it to be delivered tomorrow.

The next night, he was cooking dinner and squinting at his iPad, when the recipe webpage disappeared in favor of an incoming call.

“Milan?” Logan asked when Leo answered.

“Yep,” Leo said. He leaned his elbows on the counter. “Is that okay?”

“That’s longer,” Logan said.

“I know,” Leo sighed. “But it’s when I’m in between projects and can write your follow up.”

Finn mirrored his position, squeezing into the frame beside Logan. “Why don’t you come here right now? I’ll write you a note, get you out of school. Photoshoot tomorrow, you can watch us kiss on camera.” Finn snuck a hand out to grab Logan’s chin when he wasn’t looking and turned his face to kiss him, even if Logan was smiling too much to make it last.

Leo leaned forward. “I…As tempting as that is...”

“I liked it when we were your job,” Finn shot back. “You were around all the time.”

“Oh yeah? Not me,” Leo said. Finn blinked, and Leo fought a smile because he’d got him. “Kissing subjects is…”

“Fun?” Finn said. “A right we may exclusively reserve?”

Logan looked over at him with a smile and Leo was tempted to take a screenshot. He didn’t know how that would go over. He’d never taken a photograph of them himself. He knew that spooked some celebrities. In the beginning, he’d thought he’d die if he offended them. He still felt like that a bit.

“Shut up,” Logan said to Finn. “We don’t want to be Leo’s subjects.”

“I was kidding.”

“Listen,” Leo said. “It’s a right you can reserve, I’d just prefer you do it as you and not as Night Swimming.”

“Deal,” Finn said. He put his palm over the camera briefly, as if they had shaken on it. “What are you doing?”

“I’m cooking dinner.” Leo said, mimicking Finn’s sing-song—and then realized he’d basically just sung in front of Finn and tried to forget about it. “What are you doing?”

“Waiting for you to come back,” Logan said.

Leo arched a brow. “To cook you dinner?”

“Non,” Logan laughed. He rested his chin on a palm, and Leo got basically an entire screen full of those green eyes looking over—him, he realized. Logan’s gaze darted over his face like he could do it for hours. “Other things.”

Heat washed over him, and Leo bit his lip. “Hmm…Play me more songs?”

“Can do, Sunshine,” Finn said.

They kept him company while he finished cleaning up, taking him through the packet they’d been sent concerning their photoshoot tomorrow.

“We’re doing it down by the sea,” Finn said. He was lounging on the couch, Logan at his feet holding a cup of tea. “And some house shots.” He tapped the leather couch. “Probably right here. Or the kitchen…Well, if it’s the kitchen, I know what I’ll be thinking about.”

Leo laughed as he shut his dishwasher. “Yeah, that kitchen gets a lot of action when I’m there.”

“Not when I’m there,” Logan said.

“Don’t worry, baby,” Finn said, running his fingers through Logan’s hair. “We’ve got a pretty good track record in Italy, don’t we?”

~

Leo didn’t sleep much that night. He usually didn’t before a flight. Something about the anticipation. Not that this was bad anticipation. He let himself drift and think, rather than fall and worry. Still awake, but lighter. The story was out of his hands now, gone to turn into paper and ink. He would write his follow up, but then…

Just three people, Finn had said. Just three people.

On his nightstand, his phone lit up his dark ceiling. Leo turned his head. There weren’t many people who could get through his Do Not Disturb. Part of him got nervous, wondering if something was wrong, and he propped himself up on an elbow quickly, pulling the phone off its charger.

you’re awake

Three words, soft as a whisper. From Logan. Just Logan.

A moment later came the ?

Leo rolled onto his back, grinning.

are you spying on me somehow?

Finn said you have trouble sleeping, came the reply.

I do sometimes, Leo sent. And then, do you not like question marks or something?

I just thought I was right

Leo laughed out loud, all to himself.

well, I am awake.

are you okay? Logan asked.

Yeah. Just thinking.

A bit of a pause, just long enough to make Leo bite his lip.

about what?

Leo typed his reply out slowly, carefully. Savoring getting to say these words. Getting more than one kiss from you.

An immediate reply. maybe I won’t ruin it this time

Leo smiled. I think the last thing you did was ruin it.

:)

God. Smiley faces from Logan Tremblay.

go to sleep so you get here faster, Logan wrote. or just get here now.

Job—remember?

:(

Leo laughed again. I do have a surprise for you when I get there.

what is it? Logan asked immediately.

“Classic,” Leo whispered to himself, but just sent a smiley in return. Then, after a moment’s thought—

goodnight, green eyes

~

The article, when it came out, was hot as lightning. The photographs were gorgeous. Natural. They turned into each other like puzzle pieces, dressed in the muted, gentle browns of the house, and then the bright jewels of green and blue. But it was the opening show that came after it that caused the storm.

Leo didn’t get a single bit of work done—but neither did Cassie, so it was fine. He had never watched a grainy live stream closer and made Cassie go out and get him lunch so he didn’t have to get up. He brought his phone to the bathroom with him. He’d never refreshed Twitter so many times to find new photographs and videos. Finn, getting a pride flag thrown up to him at one point. The moments when they shared the microphone now sometimes ended in a kiss. A kiss. Leo was laughing and choked up all at once. Logan’s hat said rouge.

“Is there a reason you didn’t choose that show?” Cassie asked.

He’d thought about it. Being there. He could have gotten out of work—not in a I’m sort of kind of dating them and suddenly I miss them every second please let me go way but in a…this is important for the follow up way. But. He hadn’t. Somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to.

“This is a long time coming for them,” Leo said carefully, and found it true. “This is something they thought they’d never have. It’s theirs. And I wanted them to have it more than anything.”

Cassie’s eyes softened. She’d wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. “They better know how lucky they are if they’re getting you.”

Leo smiled and tilted their heads together, turning back to the show.

“Well, fuck,” Finn’s voice echoed through the stadium as he sat down at the piano. “You guys know what song’s coming by now, I guess.”

Rooftop, Leo thought, and shushed Cassie so harshly that she rolled her eyes and knocked him lightly on the shoulder.

Logan was still on stage, though, and getting up from behind his set. Leo’s heart leapt right into his throat.

“Something’s happening,” Leo said. “Something’s happening.”

“You shush,” Cassie said.

“Or at least you thought you did,” Finn said, then leaned back and laughed, the microphone barely catching it over the answering cheers. Logan crossed the stage, taking his time. Finn made room for him on the piano bench seat and Logan slotted perfectly against his side.

“No, look,” Finn played a few chords. “Rooftop has a special place in my heart, but it’s no part of tonight. Tonight…” He looked at Logan. “Tonight how about a little duet, Tremblay?”

Leo knew these chords. He loved these chords. And now, he could think of the lyrics that were about to come. They were probably some of the first words written about both of them letting themselves have each other…It was perfect. The crowd knew the song, too, and they were manic when Logan started playing the piano’s lower register, almost like a bass to Finn’s higher, softer melody.

A crew member brought out a second microphone and fixed it over the piano. Logan thanked him with a nod, and leaned in.

“You should have seen Finn trying to teach me piano,” his voice echoed.

Leo leaned closer to the screen. “Oh my God.”

Cassie sorted. “You’re so smitten.”

“They’re playing Keep.” 

“Yes, I know, I am a fan, too!”

I see you in the morning staring out over the waves.

I find I don’t need my instincts, never thought I’d see the day.

I could just roll over, yeah, I could close my eyes,

Cause I don’t have to grasp at glimpses, no, I’ve got my whole life.

I’ll tell anyone who asks, 

“Harmony, harmony,” Cassie said, imitating Leo’s accent.

Leo wrapped an arm around her shoulders and put his palm over her mouth. But she was right. The harmony, Logan joining in on the chorus, was exquisite.

I’ll show anyone who wants to see.

Like sea glass, or pebbles found on the beach.

Oh God, look at what I get to keep.

I’ll hold it as long as my breath lasts.

I’ll say it in all the languages they speak.

Like histories or songs sung while out at sea,

Hey Sunshine, what do you say you keep me?

Cassie made a strangled noise before Leo could. She pulled Leo’s hand away from her mouth.

“Sunshine? He just—They just changed the lyrics,” Cassie said. She got her arms around Leo’s waist and shrieked, making everyone in the office look at them. “He changed the lyrics.”

Leo was going to melt into his keyboard. Or cry? No. He was going to love them.

“I see you in the kitchen just before we go to sleep—” Finn gave his head a little, sharp shake, smiling, and when he looked up, Leo saw that he was crying, unable to sing through it. The crowd filled in. I find I don’t need my instincts, you are mine to keep.

Leo touched his lips lightly. Leo wouldn’t forget that sound, the stadium singing for them like that, even through a video. Not ever. He wouldn’t forget the feeling of knowing how much Finn and Logan deserved it. And how much he wanted them to have this. And how sweet is was when Logan played the last note, Finn wrapping an arm around him and pressing a lingering kiss to his temple, and Logan catching Finn’s tears with a gentle hand.

Finn found one of the stadium cameras, touched a hand to his mouth, and held it out.

Oh God, Leo was going to really love them.

~

Leo could feel the change in the air the moment he stepped of his airplane. Humid, but light. He rolled up the sleeves of his button-down and put his sunglasses on as he stepped into the warm afternoon. He was a little groggy from his flight, but not too bad. He was hungry, though, and in desperate need of a coffee—which he was most certainly in the right place for.

“Mr. Knut?”

Leo turned, pulling his suitcase up to his side. A man was standing there, sleek in a light gray suit and a driver’s cap. He had a neatly tripped gray beard, kind eyes, and a light British accent.

“Yes?” Leo said. “Oh, are you—”

“Mr. Tremblay’s driver, yes. Ralph, it’s a pleasure.” Ralph motioned towards his suitcase. “Might I take care of that for you, sir, on the way to the car?”

“Oh, no, that’s all right,” Leo said. “But thank you. It’s nice enough of him to send you to get me. Very kind.”

“Yes, he was very keen. This way, sir.”

Leo followed him the short distance to the car park, remarking on the weather just because he wasn’t used to being called sir. Ralph was kind about it, offering small talk right back. The car was shiny and black, the windows so dark and opaque that Leo guessed that was why Logan used it. He stored his suitcase and laptop bag and stuttered around Ralph opening his door for him.

“Oh, wow—thanks so much.”

“Of course, sir.”

Leo slid into the smooth, leather seat. The whole car smelled new. There was a water bottle waiting for him in the door side pocket, nestled into a tortoise shell cup holder. Leo took his sunglasses off just as the door shut—

And then someone was grabbing onto his shirt and tugging. An insistent, warm mouth covered his, swallowing Leo’s sound of surprise.

Logan. The warm, pine scent of him. The feeling of canvas when Leo made to touch his hair. The weight of him swinging a leg over Leo’s lap. Callouses on his hands where they smoothed up Leo’s neck.

“Hello,” Leo gasped. “Fuck.”

“Hi.” Logan barely said the word before he was kissing him again. Leo had to let his head rest back against the seat he was so dizzy with it. His mouth probably tasted sour, he was probably sweaty, maybe he even smelled from the plane, but Logan didn’t seem to care.

“Where’s—”

“Sound check,” Logan gasped, and then he had Leo’s bottom lip gently between his teeth, pulling and letting go. “He’ll be at the hotel by the time we get there.”

“You don’t need—your sound checked?”

“I need this.”

From his place on Leo’s lap, Logan put a hand on the ceiling. For a moment, Leo wondered what the hell he was in for in the back of this car, but Logan’s fingers found a button that he pushed and up a partition between them and Ralph began to rise.

“Hotel, sir?” Ralph asked as the sheet rose.

“Merci,” Logan confirmed, and then the partition cut them off in a muffled, tinted-window bubble of their own making and Logan’s hungry green eyes were all Leo was left with.

Their breathing sounded loud to Leo’s ears. He got his first good look at Logan. White t-shirt, black cotton shorts. Green hat, backwards. Tan, gorgeous, just like Leo remembered him, but even more real. A small scratch on his cheek from somewhere. He’d cut himself shaving on his chin, a little red dot. Leo reached up and took off his hat, letting his bangs fall forward in their gentle waves. They were pretty light from all the sunshine.

“Can he…” Leo whispered. “Can Ralph hear us?”

Slowly, Logan shook his head.

Leo reached up and tucked his fingers through Logan’s hair. He could have lived off of the way Logan’s eyes slipped closed. “How long is the drive?”

“Thirty minutes.”

“Hm.”

Logan’s smile looked like one of his soft, lulling songs. “What does that mean?”

Leo didn’t answer. He’d been taken by surprise, but that was fading now. All it left behind was want and relief. For now, he was done with the distance and the florescent lights of his office. He was back in Logan’s arms.

Thirty minutes felt like five. Logan’s soft sounds filled him right up as Leo kissed his neck—that was when Ralph’s gentle knock from the driver’s seat came. Leo broke off, startled. His mouth felt puffy—and good. Logan’s warm weight felt like the only thing holding him together.

“Ouais,” Logan called. “One moment.”

As Logan leaned their foreheads together, the world filtered back in. Leo became aware of the sound of a crowd outside, and had to laugh.

“Are we about to be photographed?”

“Probably a little,” Logan said. “It’s okay. You wouldn’t believe how many times Finn and I have had this happen.”

“What, got a little heavy in the car?”

Logan grinned, ducking to kiss Leo again. “Mhm.”

“That’s…” Really hot.

Logan slid off his lap, back to his side. They both spent a moment trying to pull themselves together. Logan would have to get out first, which made Leo feel a little better.

“They’ll bring your bags to the room,” Logan said. He slipped on a pair of sunglasses. “Ready?”

Hands banged against the windows, making Leo jump. There were some chants of Finn’s name, along with Logan’s, and Leo realized they didn’t know who was in the car. “I—yeah.” The room. “I think so.”

Logan considered him for a moment, then took off his own hat and placed it, bill forward, on Leo’s head.

“Oh,” Leo said. “Do I look—”

“You look how I want you to look. Merde, I want Finn to see you.” Logan grinned. “But it may be a bit much for a photo.”

Leo reached up and touched the hat. It was green and had said the word LOVE on it. That was a story Leo wanted to write. Logan could say a lot with his hats. There were whole twitter accounts dedicated to the way he hinted at future songs or albums with what was on his hat.

LOVE. Leo was wearing the word love.

“I know I shouldn’t hold your hand quite yet,” Logan began, trailing off.

Leo laughed. “That would spark some wild rumors.”

Logan looked at him over the rim of his glasses, the shadow making his green eyes bright. “Stay close to me, okay?” He popped the car door and the sound of the crowd doubled, frenzied, screaming, yearning. “Stay close.”

Leo could hear his own heartbeat. He could feel it in his throat. He did want to hold Logan’s hand. “I will.”

And Leo experienced the cameras and fans from an entirely different view. He’d followed Finn and Logan around. He’d never walked with them, not like this. Not side by side in a way that signaled to everyone he was with them.

He stuck close to Logan’s back, as promised. He caught some curious looks, felt phone cameras trained on him. The sun was bright and he was very glad for Logan’s hat. He tried to take it in, if for nothing further than that this was the biggest crowd he’d ever followed a star through from this close, but it was over in a flash. They were in a cool hotel lobby, marble and stone, and a smiling woman, motioning them to the elevator. Logan’s two security guards got in with them.

The sudden silence was loud. Logan took his sunglasses off, casually folding them into his shirt and leaning back against the wall as they rose.

“Here we go, Tremz,” one of the guards said, fist bumping Logan as he passed him through the open doors. “See you tonight. Remind Finn the dinner res he asked for is at eight-thirty.”

“Thanks, Paul.” Logan looked back from the hallway. “Leo?”

“Sorry,” Leo said and strode forward. “Thanks—Thanks, Paul.”

Paul was a massive guy, but when he smiled he looked like a teddy bear. “You got it, man.”

There was only one door on this hallway, right in front of them with a large brass knocker, and no sooner had the elevator shut than did it swing open to reveal Finn—sweaty, in a soft looking gray t-shirt and running shorts, and grinning.

“Jesus,” Logan said. “You scared me.”

“I heard the ding,” Finn said cheerfully.

He was looking right at Leo. Leo drew Logan’s hat off, trying to catch his breath.

“There were crowds,” Logan said, as if explaining.

“Yeah,” Leo said. “Are you guys famous or something?”

Finn ignored the joke. He walked right up to Leo, wrapped him up in his arms, and held on tight. Leo had maybe been expecting a kiss—probably something a tad more obvious than Logan’s sneak-attack. But the hug was better. Finn was warm. He smelled like sweat and sunscreen from being on stage.

“Hi,” Finn whispered in his ear. He pulled back, holding Leo’s cheek briefly, then gently tweaked a curl of Leo’s blond hair. “Hi, Sunshine.”

Leo covered Finn’s hand, turning his mouth against it. “Hi.”

“Come here,” Finn said, laughing. “Come in.”

“Ouais.” Logan put a hand low on Leo’s back, guiding him through the suite door. “Where’s my surprise?”

“What surprise?” Finn asked as the door shut behind them. Sure enough, Leo’s bags were waiting there, neatly side-by-side near the small kitchen.

“Not till later,” Leo said.

Logan narrowed his eyes. “How later?”

“Tomorrow later.”

Logan huffed.

Finn came up behind him, pressing a small cup into his hand. Espresso.

“Oh, how did you know?” Leo sipped it down easily. Hot and slightly sweet with sugar.

“You’re in Italy,” Finn said. Next he was wrapping an arm around Leo’s waist. “You understand that if it’s a physical surprise, he’s going to dig through your luggage?”

Leo toyed with his delicate espresso cup.“Not if I say not to.”

Finn’s chin hooked over his shoulder. Leo could feel his laugh against his skin. His strong chest against his back. His hips— “You think he’ll listen to you?”

They both regarded Logan, who was still glaring at them—and glancing at Leo’s suitcase.

“I think he will.”

“Hm,” Finn said, and Leo felt a kiss land on his neck. “I think you’re right.” Another kiss to the exact same spot. Over a mark Logan had made? “I see someone has already gotten to you.”

“I was accosted in the car,” Leo said.

“Classic.”

Logan just rolled his eyes and began dragging Leo’s suitcase into another room.

By that night, the fans who didn’t read up on their music stories had already figured out who he was. Leo Knut—last seen on the road writing the coming out piece on Night Swimming. Sure enough, Twitter was full of wearing Lo’s hat wearing Lo’s hat???

“Ooh, you’re so undercover,” Finn commented when he glimpsed Leo’s phone once they were back in the car, speeding through the night on the way to dinner. “They don’t know what’s coming for them.”

Leo clicked his phone off even as Cassie texted nice hat. He looked at Logan, at a purplish bruise Leo had left on his neck. “No, they really don’t.”

Logan covered the mark with his palm and grinned out the window. Leo laughed, looking, too, then paused.

“Hey, are we leaving the city?”

“Yep,” Finn said.

“Where?” Logan asked.

Finn shrugged exaggeratedly. He’d changed into a dark blue button down, light slacks, and pretty brown leather shoes that Leo badly wanted a pair of. He’d pushed a dark green button down towards Logan, dark trousers, and white, pristine sneakers. He’d taken one look at Leo and told him he was perfect, but Leo had showered and changed anyway. Dusty red shirt. He’d followed Finn’s lead and left the collar loose.

Logan kicked at Finn from his seat across from the both of them. Finn just stuck his tongue out and took Leo’s hand across the console between them. Leo stared at it for a moment. Finn’s pale fingers that would be playing a guitar to thousands of people tomorrow were right there wrapped up in his own.

“Where?” Logan insisted.

“Jesus, Lo, can neither of us try and surprise you? I know you found all your presents as a kid, but you’re not finding the ones I give you.” Finn dropped a wink. “I’ll give it to you when I decide.”

Apparently where was a castle. Literally a castle. Soft lights flooded up the old stones to reveal turrets and archways. A man in a tuxedo was waiting for them at the entrance. They were given champagne in thin, airy glasses and leave to roam the lit gardens before their dinner was served. The air was mild, but the feeling of Finn and Logan at his shoulders was better. Finn had something to say about every flower, every piece of architecture, as if he had studied up for this night. They ate dinner under the stars, watching fireflies dart through the greenery.

It wasn’t until they had been served an array of desserts and left truly alone that Leo thought to bring up the article and how they were doing—it was different to ask without a screen between them.

“We’re so good,” Finn said. He looked at Logan, who nodded. Finn wrapped an arm around Logan’s chair, scooting it closer to his. Leo watched him lean into him. His brown eyes flickered to Leo even as his lips brushed Logan’s skin. “Lo?”

“Ouais, I…” Logan gave up on words and tucked his face into Finn’s neck, laughing.

Leo leaned back in his chair, glad the table let him stretch his still plane-cramped legs out under the table. “It’s so nice to see you up there. Really. I can’t wait for tomorrow. You just look so…free.”

“We feel free,” Finn said. “And it’s thanks to you.” He held out a hand across the linen tablecloth and, after a moment, Leo took it. “How are you, Le?”

Leo let out a slow breath, watching the way Finn’s thumb tracked across his knuckles. “I’m…” He laughed a little. “That’s quite a question. Really quite a question.”

Logan laughed, and when Leo realized he was laughing at him, he threw a sugar coated almond at him in a neat arc across the table—which lost all its effect when Logan caught it in his mouth.

“Non, seriously.” Logan leaned more into Finn’s side. “Leo?”

Leo looked around them. They both had a knack for finding these slices of paradise. Though, lately it had been feeling like any where they were was heaven, even his own kitchen.

“Being on tour with you was wonderful,” Leo answered. “And Nice was, of course, perfect. So beautiful…God, this is beautiful.”

“Why am I sensing a but?” Finn asked, brows drawn together. Logan looked downright nervous.

Leo shook his head, bringing his other hand to hold Finn’s as well. “No. Well, yes, but not like that.”

They both looked at him expectantly. Patiently.

“You’ve been sweet in waiting for me. And honest about wanting me.”

“We fumbled and recovered,” Finn said.

“We do want you,” Logan said earnestly.

“Well, I…I hope so,” Leo said softly. Finn’s hand tightened around his.

“Yeah?” Finn whispered.

Leo nodded. Logan couldn’t quite reach with the angle, but he reached for Leo, too, hand on Finn’s wrist.

“It’s been—what? A week and a half of video calls? You know all these glorious places are amazing, but when we’re just sitting around…I mean, when we’re just talking… Or you’re watching me wash dishes, do laundry. And I start to feel like…”

He felt the words well in his throat like tears as he looked between them. He understood Cassie’s hesitation. He understood his own hesitation. He’d been nervous that he’d come back and something would have changed. Like adrenaline leaving the system. But it hadn’t.

“I’ve never not known how to be without someone before,” Leo said. “But you make me feel like I don’t remember how to be alone.”

Finn’s smile was tearful and Leo realized he felt a little like that, too, even as Finn leaned forward and kissed him. It dissolved into a laugh, into kiss to his cheek. A piece of silverware clattered to the ground as Finn tugged Leo’s chair closer and hugged him as best he could.

“Rouge, you’re pulling the table cloth, the table—” Logan’s voice came, laughing. Leo heard his chair scoot back and then there was another pair of arms around Leo’s neck, Logan leaning over the back of his chair. He managed a sloppy kiss to Leo’s mouth, despite the angle.

Leo closed his eyes and held on. He waited for Finn to make him laugh. Or Logan to say something in French. But they stayed quiet, surprising him. He peeked one eye open, only to see that Finn, whose forehead was pressed against Leo’s temple, had his eyes closed, too. Leo didn’t dare move him to try and get at Logan, but the content sigh he felt against his neck was enough to go on for him. Wind whistled through the trees around them, bring the smell of some sweet flower. Leo closed his eyes again and leaned back into Logan’s shoulder and Finn’s arm. It was like a blanket, their quiet. They’d been more serene than he’d expected from the beginning—puzzles, dinner, reading, morning runs. This was something deeper. It was as if something unhappy had finally been able to settle for them, too. The questions were still there. How will this work? What will people think? But they were muted and far off.

They looked up at footsteps on the patio, only to find a surprised waiter holding a pitcher of water.

“Ah,” the waiter said. “Pardon me. Uh…”

“Hi,” Finn said, only lifting his head. “Yeah, we’ll take the check.”

~

They laughed about it on the car ride home, the waiter’s face. Speeding through dark hills, and then streets still filled with chatter and light. Leo watched out the window as they slowed in narrower streets. It gave him a glimpses of passing faces. Laughing, eating, kissing.

Finn’s hand pressed to his thigh. “Are you composing sentences right now? I think you are.”

Leo looked over at him. “Maybe. And you?”

“I’ve been watching you two write in your heads for the last ten minutes,” Logan said. He’d stretched his legs out so their feet slotted together in the car space between them.

“Well, no one got on my lap, I had to do something to pass the time,” Leo said, squeezing one of Logan’s ankles between his own.

Logan just looked at him with bright eyes. “I don’t want to have to stop.”

Leo let his head fall back against the seat and he put his hand over Finn’s. “You just deal with that every day?”

“All day,” Finn said. “You don’t even want to know the things he says to me before we go on stage.” Finn laughed and scooted over in his seat, pressing right up against Leo’s side. “Actually, you probably do.”

No one was waiting at the hotel this time. There were no bright flashes to catch what Leo was sure was an intense flush on his cheeks. They stayed close in the elevator, their security shaking their heads at how giddy they probably sounded—all that content silence had bubbled into talking over each other and far too loud laughter. Finn fumbled a little with the hotel key, but then they were inside the suite and met with a blast of AC. Finn went to turn it down, but Logan got his hands on Leo’s waist and pulled until Leo had him pinned right up against the side of the entrance hall.

“This is how I first met you,” Leo said, staring down at him. He traced a hand under Logan’s jaw and watched the way he bared his neck for more. “I was so surprised. And you were so beautiful. And also you literally did not stop making out with Finn which was, like, okay then.”

Finn’s laugh reached them. “I asked him that after you left. I was like, how long was he standing there actually? And he wouldn’t tell me.”

“What’d you want, Lo?” Leo whispered, leaning down to kiss him softly. “Me to walk in ready to go right then?”

“Non, I wanted to see if you thought I was hot,” Logan said, then laughed as Leo pulled back to follow Finn’s voice into the living room. He called after him, “And you do!”

Finn had his dress shirt half unbuttoned and his belt in one hand, frowning at something on his phone.

“You okay there difficult rock star?” Leo asked, trying not to stare at his pale chest against the blush color.

Finn looked up, all big brown eyes suddenly—how did he do that? Switch between unbearably hot to unbearably sweet in two seconds—and smiled. “Oh. This isn’t what it looks like.” He gestured to himself with his belt. “I just wanted to change. And yeah, just tomorrow’s call times.”

Call times. Show tomorrow. Leo took a breath. Right. What time was it? Midnight? One? Leo knew they should sleep. He’d seen them on the nights before shows many times now. Logan drank mint tea. Finn read. Unless they had friends at the shows, or family, they tried to get as much sleep as they could. Logan slept in as much as he could. Finn seemed incapable of sleeping in, but he went for a run and he ordered up a big breakfast. God, Leo wanted to make them breakfast again. He wanted the way they sat with him, looked at him, made him coffee.

Leo nodded. He emptied his pockets, setting his phone and wallet on a side table. “I hope it’s not too early? I know your routines the night before a show and this isn’t it. It’s early for me, technically. But it’s late for you.”

Leo’s eyes drew down Finn’s body again. The half-untucked shirt. He was pretty sure those socks he was wearing were the ones advertised on TV offering arch support. Why, why was that hot right now? It was. And maybe Leo wanted the way Finn looked right now to be exactly what it looked like. What then?

Finn was quiet, glancing at Logan as he came into the room and sat on the back of the couch to look at Leo. Finn drew in a slow breath, stretching his arms up and behind his head, so that when he spoke his voice came out tensed like his muscles—which Leo could see more of now, the sharp cut just above his waistline. “I mean, you could…” He grinned, dropping his arms and relaxing. “We could get you on the right time zone.”

Leo bit at the inside of his cheek. That wasn’t exactly the line he’d heard in Finn’s voice during all of his laundry-folding day dreams, but it was so very Finn that it was better.

“What did your team think when you said I’d be staying with you?” Leo glanced up around the room. “I mean, in the same…” Bedroom? “Suite.”

“They’re our team for a reason,” Finn said. “They know what’s their business, and what’s ours.”

Leo raised an eyebrow. “And my being a reporter isn’t their business? I bet at least a few people would disagree with that.”

“You’re not the kind of reporter they worry about,” Logan said. “Unless you suddenly revealed a long-range camera in your suitcase.” He tilted his head teasingly. “That’s not the surprise, is it?”

“No,” Leo laughed. “Definitely not the surprise.”

“And just to be clear,” Finn said. “Because looks like we’re not great on being clear—”

“Room, not suite,” Logan cut in.

“Jeez, way to grab my punchline and yank it out from beneath my feet.” Finn strode closer and put his hand on Logan’s shoulder. “But yes. We were hoping…I mean, there is another room. Two other, in fact, for you to choose from.” He tilted his head. “But I was hoping just your suitcase would be staying there.”

“We,” Logan said, rising from his seat.

“We were hoping.”

Logan stood in front of Leo. He held out his hands palm up, and Leo put his palms into them. Logan gave a gentle tug. When Leo hesitated, worrying the inside of his cheek, it took about half a second for concern to flicker over Logan’s face.

“Le?” he asked gently. “What…What did I do?”

“No, no, no,” Leo said. “Nothing. I want that. I really, really want that. I just…” Leo sighed, cursing himself. The nerves he’d felt while packing sprung back at him. Look at them. Look at them.

“It’s been a while for me,” Leo said softly. “I mean—I mean a while. And you two know each other—so well. I just don’t want…to, like, disappoint, or…”

“Non,” Logan said.

“You couldn’t,” Finn added. “Leo, you couldn’t disappoint us. Like, ever.”

Leo knew that. He did. He even believed it. It didn’t stop the idea that he would from making him want to crawl under the covers and hide.

“I’m looking at two people who know each other inside and out,” Leo said. “And I love that about you two. But—yeah. That’s all.”

Finn and Logan looked at each other. Leo didn’t mind the silent communication ability. He even liked it. It was sweet. In his dreams, he got that ability with them, too. One day.

Finn stepped forward. It wasn’t the stage walk. It was just him. Even in the button-down that Leo now knew to be the softest linen, it was just him. Not all the photos Leo had seen of fans catching him on the street—sunglasses, t-shirt, notebook or coffee…smiling, talking with them, and uncapping Sharpies with his teeth. Leo had looked at the photos from that particular day a lot. A lot. Summer in New York, headed to the recording studio, stooping so a girl could slip a necklace she had made him over his head.

“Okay.” Finn smiled softly. “There’s one thing we can do no matter what. It’s late. We can just get ready for bed and…and then whatever you want.”

Logan nodded. “Whatever you want.”

“We do know each other through and through,” Finn said. He tucked a stray curl behind Leo’s ear, but Leo felt it spring back into place. “Which is why we know how much we want you here.”

Leo shook his head, putting a hand against Finn’s chest. “You don’t have to convince me. I’m just…” Leo looked to Logan. “I…This is like a dream? A really good dream.”

“Leo.” Finn’s voice was overly serious, but Leo caught the spark in his eye. “Were we your celebrity crushes or something?” 

Leo’s laugh surprised him, head falling back. “Finn.”

“Aw,” Finn wrapped his arms around Leo’s waist. “I embarrassed him. Look, Lo, we were his celebrity crush.”

“First, I meant because you’re so sweet. And second, I’m pretty sure you could attempt world domination with the number of people who would name you if asked who their crush is,” Leo said.

“Maybe,” Finn replied. “But I only care about one.”

It was the little things, first. Logan left small pools of water all around the sink when he washed his face. He went to Leo’s luggage, and Leo only had time to call out a warning don’t before Logan was pulling out a t-shirt with a delighted laugh. Thankfully, it wasn’t his surprise one…But it was Finn’s.

Leo was brushing his teeth next to Finn O’Hara in Italy, and Logan Tremblay was holding up his HEARTTHROB O’HARA t-shirt with a grin on his face that said it all.

“That was also a surprise,” Leo said around his toothpaste. He groaned, and put a hand over Finn’s delighted eyes as passed him to go rinse his mouth.

When he leaned up from the faucet, Finn was there, rinsing beside him. Leo cleared his throat, laughing a little under the feeling of Finn’s gaze. He tried to escape, honestly he had no idea what to say, but two hands caught his hips and a hard, warm chest met Leo’s back.

They looked at each other in the mirror. The lights were soft and dim, bringing out each of Finn’s freckles. Leo put his hand over where Finn’s rested low on his stomach.

“I’m embarrassed,” Leo said, smiling down at the sink. “It’s stupid, right?”

With a slight pressure to his hip, Finn turned Leo around. Leo rested back against the counter’s edge, and Finn nudged his way to stand between his thighs. He carded Leo’s hair back from his face, the ends damp from washing his face.

“Nothing about you could ever be stupid,” Finn said.

Leo traced the N of his NASA t-shirt, then one of the trails on a shooting star. “You probably see people in that shirt all the time. Probably have signed that shirt a million times.” Leo closed his eyes. “Shit. I’d say I’m not some crazy fan, but younger me was definitely a crazy fan.” He looked up at Finn. “But you know all about crazy fans.”

Finn smiled a little. He barely had to tilt his chin forward at all to brush their mouths together. “I do know a little about that.”

“So maybe the shirt doesn’t even matter?” Leo asked hopefully. Finn’s brown eyes were staring at his mouth—that still had toothpaste on it maybe?

“Everything about you matters,” Finn said, and kissed him.

It brought back the rush of the ocean. The heat of the sun, sitting against those cliffs when Leo had been so confused, so in want. He knew how to hold himself together. God, if there was one thing he was so very good at in this world, it was holding himself together.

“Maybe I’m your crazy fan,” Finn whispered. “I’ve been stalking your writing for long enough.”

Leo laughed. “Mm, that’s true.” He reached up for Finn’s shoulders, pulling him closer.

He didn’t want to hold himself together anymore. He didn’t want to hold back. Nothing he knew even compared to this. Not the fame, not the novelty. This. Worn out t-shirts and getting to have a perfect fit in a legendary love like theirs. These were new muscles, letting himself go, and he’d been straining them with these two. They felt stronger now.

The band of his pajama pants was wet from being pressed back into Logan’s puddles. Finn tasted minty, and with him standing between Leo’s thighs like this, Leo got to tilt his head up into the kiss.

“How do I look?”

They broke apart to see Logan standing in the bathroom doorway. He wore a soft looking pair of gray boxers, and his chest and arms filled out Leo’s t-shirt in a way Leo had never, would never have even thought, to imagine.

While Leo sat there staring, Finn laughed. “That thing looks like it’s about to fall to pieces.”

He wasn’t wrong. There was a hole near the collar, the letters were faded at the edges. But it was so damn soft from years of being washed that Leo couldn’t bare to part with it. He reached up and pushed his fingers through Finn’s hair. That gorgeous red hair. Maybe there was so much more he couldn’t part with now.

“Ouais, me too,” Logan said. Leo didn’t know what he was talking about until he walked forward and reached up for Finn’s hair, completely messing it up. “Everyone’s obsessed with it, but how can you not be?”

Leo laughed as Finn squinted one eye shut but let them have their fun. It was soft and thick, the sorter strands at the sides feathering through Leo’s fingers like velvet.

Finn put a hand on Logan’s chest, tapping over the letters of Leo’s t-shirt. “I always guessed that was why everything they put my name in is red, too.”

“Marketing?” Leo said.

“Yeah.” Finn sighed, shrugged, then smiled. “Le, that shirt really is about to fall apart.”

“I…wear it a lot.”

“Oh yeah? All around the city with my name on your heart?”

Leo bit his lip. It was more than that. It was what he wore when he was sad, or had had a bad day. When he was sick, or exhausted, or angry.

And then, over the past month, that comfort had shifted to them. A bad day at work ended with four hour FaceTimes until Leo was too sleepy to talk anymore and Finn’s soft voice. Goodnight, Sunshine. And when he couldn’t sleep, somehow Logan always knew. The soft light of his phone lighting up his bedroom from his nightstand and never letting him feel alone or sinking or like he would never sleep again.

“Le?” Finn asked softly. His hair was a mess from their hands. His eyes were pure syrup again, asking, checking, worried—loving?

“Hi,” Leo said. “Sorry, hi.” He put a hand on Finn’s cheek and looked at Logan.

Logan tilted his head. “What are you writing right now, Soleil?”

Leo closed his eyes briefly at the nickname, leaning his head back to bask in it. “Dialogue, I guess.”

“Ouais,” Logan said, wrapping an arm around Leo’s waist. It completed the circle of the three of them. “Of?”

“How to ask you to take me to bed,” Leo whispered.

“Yes,” Finn breathed, and then Leo was being kissed.

He’d written a lot of words in his life. It was almost funny to be asked what he was writing right then. He wasn’t even sure this was something that could be written. What did kiss have on what Finn gave him? It was just what Leo remembered. The heated energy from that middle of the night kiss in Nice, only tripled.

“Hey.” Logan’s voice was low. Leo felt fingers tighten in his hair and he gasped, breaking Finn’s kiss long enough to be pulled to another mouth. The ocean and the shade. The shade and the ocean. Finn’s laugh echoed against the bathroom tiles. He was watching them. He had a hand on Leo’s back, and probably Logan’s, and let them kiss.

No, Leo couldn’t have written this down. Logan, pulling him towards the bedroom. Finn flicking off the bathroom light and leaving them in the yellow-pink glow of a reading lamp and the moon.

“I’d raise the sun if I could,” he said. He caught Leo up around the waist again. “Just because it’s dark in here doesn’t mean I want it to be.”

“Finn.” It sounded pleading, but Leo hadn’t meant it that way. Not stop. Not more. Just… “Have some compassion for how full my heart can be right now, O’Hara.”

And then Leo took that famous NASA t-shirt right off of him. The stars and the comet trails, they were still there. Finn’s torso was its own sky map and Leo, wondering what Finn liked, bent to kiss a trail of his own along one thin collarbone.

What words existed for the feeling of Finn chest rising and falling against his mouth.

What words could Leo have used to describe the smile Logan gave him as he let Leo pull his t-shirt off of him next? All Leo could comprehend was the sheer strength of his arms and the dark trail of hair that led down into his boxers.

There were no hesitations, like Leo had thought there would be. The pauses were woven in, just turns and folds and lifts like pages. Yes? This? Grins and breaths and—Logan’s sounds. Logan. Logan knew what he wanted. Finn knew what Logan wanted. Leo, very quickly, knew what Logan wanted and shared a slightly dazed grin with Finn about it. He got to watch Finn’s practiced fingers, and see how much Finn enjoyed giving Logan everything he could possibly desire. It was as sweet as it was unbearably hot. Finn looked so pale against Logan’s tanned skin. Marble. That was a word Leo had used before, but it applied. Jesus Christ, it applied.

What did grip have on the way Logan clutched at Leo’s shoulders when they were at last as close as anything could be, his thighs shaking against Leo’s. Bliss, certainly, was nothing compared to the look on Logan’s face when Finn’s hand pressed over the strong curve of his adam’s apple and asked him how he liked it, told him they looked gorgeous. Throbbing held nothing to the way Leo’s heart pounded, and more than nothing to how close those words brought him to the edge. Rhythm. That’s what Logan had. Leo set his hands against the small of his back—two dimples there, made for Leo’s thumbs—and held on.

“Mm—” Logan’s breath came out short and he froze, mouth open against Leo’s neck. His back was slick with sweat now. Finn sat back on his heels just beside them, working himself slowly.

“What you waiting for, baby?” Finn breathed. He’d not been moving much, but there was a sheen over his nose and temples, too. Just from watching. Now, he shifted behind Leo and wrapped his arms around his waist, nuzzling under his jaw.

Leo reached between them and Logan muffled his sound in Leo’s neck. Logan hadn’t been warm from the second he met him, but oh, he was warm now. Burning in Leo’s hands, against Leo’s body.

“I just want it to last,” Logan said shakily, but he was moving again, like he couldn’t help it. “You’re leaving in two days.” Logan wrapped his arms fully around Leo’s shoulders. “Don’t.”

“Don’t even know how—” Leo’s eyes slipped shut and he tried to breathe through the mix of white hot pleasure and blue tenderness pulsing through him. “How to think about leaving.” He smoothed his hands up Logan’s back, feeling the way it flexed as Logan moved against him.

“Ouais,” Logan said, a smile slipping across his face. He pulled back, his breathing jumping as their hips shifted. He kissed Leo hard, then cursed softly and let his head fall back. “Fuck…Leo…”

With his hair falling back and out of his eyes like that, Leo’s language left him entirely. He’d seen him like this on stage, lost in the music. He’d watched from the VIP booth, from the wings. Logan was closer to him than Finn was, always staying in one place. He’d seen the lights catch his every angle as he threw his head back, sweat dampening his dark hair, and played with everything he had. Tonight, Leo felt like theirs in that same way.

The sheets were kicked towards the end of the bed, or pooled on the floor. Leo’s head was on Finn’s chest, Logan’s forehead pressed to the top of his spine. Leo couldn’t stop touching them. He trailed his fingertips down Finn’s chest and watched goosebumps follow in their wake. Logan had a thigh thrown over his hip and Leo stroked the unbearably soft skin behind his knee. He dipped his thumb in the divot below Finn��s bottom lip.

Finn smiled sleepily, his eyes closed. His eyelashes were dark just now. In certain lights they tinged lighter, like his hair. “You’re ticklish.”

“You’re soft,” Leo replied.

“Is he asleep?” Finn whispered.

“Non,” came Logan’s voice, though he sounded part of the way there.

“I’m not kidding.” Leo reached back to hold Logan’s hip. “I’m getting up if I start keeping you awake with my tossing around.”

That was a lie. There was nothing that could haul Leo out of where he was right now.

“Nu-uh.” Finn kissed Leo’s temple. “No tossing. Not with the weighted blanket I have.”

“You travel with a weighted blanket?” Leo asked skeptically.

Finn reached out and picked up Logan’s hand, kissing his knuckles. “Sure do.”

“Oh,” Leo laughed.

“One-hundred percent effective, I promise.”

When Finn turned the lights off, it sent the room into near complete darkness and so Leo could do nothing but feel, in every nerve, and expanse of exposed skin, the way Logan nudged his nose into the soft hair at his nape, and the way Finn rolled onto his side to hold them both.

“Show tomorrow,” Finn whispered. “You ready?”

Leo smiled. “Do I have to be ready? I think that’s supposed my question to you two.”

“You have to be ready,” Finn placed a kiss to his neck. “It’s a Leo show.”

[idk6123]

Boring Foster Home, Interesting Roommate (Lip Gallagher X Male Reader)

Getting back to foster care it’s always temporary. One way or another, the Gallaghers always stay together, for the better or worse. Still, foster care is a bitch, and somehow the group always end up with the worst kind of foster parents. Lip wasn’t surprised at all to learn his foster parents are devout Jehovah witnesses.

“We hold a daily bible study at 4PM. We expect you to dress modestly all the time. You need to ask permission to use the phone, and no cellphones allowed. We don’t allow any kind of media that defies our beliefs. Alcohol and drugs aren’t allowed. Any breaking of these rules will be swiftly punished.”

To be honest, Lip doesn’t listen at all as he follows his foster father. He’s smart enough to know what being a Jehovah Witness is about, and he can summarize it in one sentence: no fun at all cost. They get to the upper floor, as they get pass multiple bedrooms, where he sees other children. There are around 12, as he counts. Most of them years younger than him. Luckily, he manages to get roomed up with someone around his own age.

“You will be sharing your room with Y/N. He helps you settle in. You two go door to door tomorrow, so no fighting.” The middle aged man disappears.

Lip walks in, with Y/N looking pass his bible, which he holds. “I love when people look dead inside the first time they get in here.”

“Not the only time I do.” Lip merely replies. He curiously looks at the bible, but Y/N reveals what he’s actually reading.

“Porn. Gotta be creative around these people.” From between the pages, Lip sees a magazine with many ripped and shirtless men.

Lip then put his bag on the other bed. When he first got here, his new foster parents searched through it and confiscating everything that isn’t allowed to be here, which is about everything.

“Want some help?”

“Not really. They already took 99% of what I brought.”

Still, Y/N closes the bible and stands up to help Lip, mainly with his clothes by putting them in the closet. “Dead parents?”

“Only dead beats. You?”

“Just dead. Since I was 2.” Y/N says as both guys unpack. “Funnily enough, this is better than the previous foster parents.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me.”

-

The next day, the family got out in the neighborhood and split up to spread the special message. This is the only time they’re allowed to walk freely. That being said, they can’t go anywhere. They only get 4 hours, where they need to be checked up every hour. During the checkups, they get frisked if they get anything bad on them, such as cigarettes. However, that won’t stop the duo.

“They usually feel pity for me and give me there junk. Pretty sure they got something for you too.” Y/N says as he and Lip walk over to a house to knock on the door. After some seconds, the door opens, showing an old grandma. “Hello, Mrs. Partridge.”

“Oh dear god, you’re back.” The old lady then looks at Lip with a sympathetic face. “I see they dragged another unfortunate soul.”

“And I won’t be the last.” Lip semi jokes.

The grandma sighs in disappointed. “Let me get something for you.” She turns around and walks away.

“Lovely lady.” Lip comments.

“Not really. She just really hates Jehovah Witnesses. She’s catholic, you see.”

“Natural enemies.”

The granny walks back, holding a bag of stuff, which she hands over to Y/N. “Make sure to not belief in their lies, young man.” She says motherly to Lip.

Lip put his hand on his chest as he takes an oath. “I won’t.”

“Good boy. Have a sweet day.”

Y/N and Lip turns around, with the one holding the bag checking it out. “Oh, she’s generous today…”

-

On a bench in the park, Lip is smoking happily, while Y/N is drinking the beer they got. Both of them intend to call it a day and not knock on the door.

“This is some good stuff.”

“Yeah, she usually gives them to me after her husband got long cancer.” Y/N explains. “Not really one of the cigs.”

“More for me.” Lip then gestures Y/N to give him the beer bottle, which he passes on. After a sip, he gives it back. The blonde then looks at the bag of loot. “I’m going to get cancer too if I take all of that.”

Y/N looks back at the bag, seeing the stacks of cigarettes. “I sell what I have over. Speaking of which.” He looks back at Lip. “They take our money when they find out, so we need to hide it.”

“In our assholes?” Lip looks amused.

“No. They can’t check them out, since we’re foster kids.” Y/N says, knowing if they aren’t, they would. “Just put them in your undies and your fine.”

“Cool. 50/50 split?”

“Sure.” With that, they give each other a box as they continue their vices.

-

Later that day, and it’s time to read the bible, the only book they’re allowed to read. They ate their dinner, and now they just have to wait to sleep. During this time, Lip feels like it takes forever until something interesting happens. It’s too early to sleep, and yet sleeping sound more fun than reading.

Both teens are lying on their bed as they read, but Lip knows what Y/N really is reading.

“Looking at porn?”

“Yep. You might as well call this the Bible.” Without looking away, Y/N talks. “Want some too?”

“Are they all gay?”

“Yeah.”

Lip sighs. On one hand, he isn’t going to enjoy it. On the other hand, he takes everything over reading this. “Whatever. Give it to me.”

Y/N closes his book and get off his bed to lift up his mattress. “What do you feel? Doctor’s appointment? Teacher romance? Military training?”

“Military training.”

Y/N grabs it and throws it towards Lip, who catches it. He put it between the pages of the bible. As Lip begins to check it out, Y/N gets back. In front of him, the genius sees a muscular men wearing military outfits while showing their sixpacks as they touch each other. As Lip opens it, he notices something.

“There is an entire story.”

“Yeah, I’m one for buildup. Think it’s more fun.”

Lip hums. Thus, he begins reading it. He isn’t sure he actually likes it, or he’s that bored he takes gay porn. Still, he likes it. To his surprise, he likes it too much. As the time passes, Y/N sometimes takes glances on Lip, to notices him way too invested. He merely let him be. It takes some time before Lip closes the book.

“Got another one?”

“Did you had fun?”

“Playing with dirt is fun when you live here.” Lip says with a smirk.

Y/N hums. “You know? There are other things we can do then reading porn.”

With a mischievous smirk, he looks at the curious teen, who couldn’t help but look at him. With swiftness, the blonde stands up, jump on Y/N and they begin making out with each other as they begin unclothing themselves and each other.

-

“And?”

“Pretty good.”

Underneath the sheets of Y/N’s bed, both teens lie next to each other as they recover after their good time.

“And here I thought you were straight.”

“Glad you proved me wrong.” Lip smirks. “I can see why Ian likes it so much.”

“Who’s Ian?”

“My brother.”

“Your brother sounds like a wise guy.”

“No, he’s a moron.” Y/N laughs, as does Lip. As they do, seconds pass and they become quieter.

“I wish we could’ve met under different circumstances.” Y/N speaks up. “Not in some dumb foster home where I can’t even kiss a guy.”

That’s when Lip thought of an idea. “We can make it so foster care take us back.”

Y/N is surprised to hear that. “We can?”

-

It takes around 2 days for Lip‘s plan to be executed. During which, they set up camera’s in the bathroom, specifically the shower. They planted booze and drinks around the house, hidden, but easy to find for the cops. After gathering their footage, they did what they did and now they can follow up through it.

They make sure their foster father is in the kitchen, while both of them are standing at the living room. With it being an open floor plan, they can be heard easily, without talking to their foster father directly.

“Dude, did you heard?”

“About Mrs. Cunningham?” Y/N replies. Now, their foster father is curious what they’re talking about his wife. “The entire school is talking about it.”

“I still find it ridiculous. Just thought of it.” Lip makes sure to choose his words wisely. Enough for Mr. Cunningham to be curious, without asking them directly. “I checked it out, and they’re right. She’s on MilfsSeeker.”

“And to think she’s so devout… Real shame.”

Both teens hold their smirks as they hear Mr. Cunningham grabbing his laptop and begin typing. It takes a couple of minutes to hear something.

“By the mother of-!? Wanda!”

Both teens can’t help but snicker a bit as they hear the man stomping on the stairs. It doesn’t take long as they begin screaming to each other, with both teens looking up to hear it.

“Are we going to call them now?” Y/N asks.

“Yep.”

-

And so, they’re back at Foster care without a home, where they’re being asked about their former home situation. The younger ones were asked separately, while Lip and Y/N both got questioned together. Both of them are sitting at an office, talking to a lady.

“I sometime see her smoking on the porch. Looks like she did it on the regular.”

“Me too. Mrs. Partridge warned me about them. And turns out, she’s right.”

“We make sure something like this ever happens again.” The woman says. “We want to sincerely apologize for putting you in such a dangerous situation. Especially after Mr. Cunningham became physical.” The woman then looks at Lip. “I got good news for you. Everything has been taken care of back at your family, and you’re allowed to go back.”

“Finally.” Lip mutters tiredly.

Y/N smiles. “Congrats.”

“Thanks.” Lip says with a smile as he looks at him, only to see Y/N’s hollow eyes. Even if he left this bad foster home, it’s unknown what crazy other foster home he goes to. Thus, he looks back at the foster home lady. “Is there any chance Y/N can go with me?”

“Lip?” Y/N looks surprised he would do something like this for him.

“I’m sorry, but you need to have permission to take care of a foster child, even if they’re 17 old.”

Although Y/N looks disappointed, Lip got a better idea. “I know who’s allow to.”

-

“Welcome to your new home, buddy!” Y/N is extremely startled as Kevin warmly greets him. In the sunset, he sees his new house. He would describe it has a ghetto, but Kevin and Veronica look like good people, so he sticks around for now. “You’re going to love it here.”

“Don’t act so exciting. You’re scaring him.” Veronica scolds him.

“It’s alright. It’s way better than… all the other foster homes I was in.”

“That’s because we’re the best!” Kevin proudly smiles. “Let us show you to your room and help you unpack.”

-

Inside of his new room, Y/N is unpacking all his bags. It isn’t much, because he wasn’t allowed much. It’s mostly clothes. He was quite insisted he can do it on his own, which Kev and V both respected and they get downstairs to prepare for dinner. As Y/N unpacks, he hears a tick from the window. He didn’t thought much about it, until he hears it again. Thus, he walks over it and look out, to see Lip outside, who was throwing small stones. With a smile, Y/N opens the window.

“Hey, I heard a cute guy moved in and I thought I should say hi.”

Y/N chuckles. “Hey. You really did me a favor.”

“Oh no, it’s not a favor. It’s a deal.” Lip explains. “You see, I got you a better home, and in return, I expect a date.”

“Like you didn’t get that either way. You should’ve demanded for more.”

Lip hums amused. “I could always ask for sex.”

“I can repeat my previous statement, but sure.” Y/N smiles. He looks back at his room, before looking back at the guy he likes. “I have to pass for today though. Dinner is almost ready and want to sleep normally.”

“Sure thing. Buuut… I still feel like spending time together. Any chance Kev and V can add another plate?”

As both teens smile, Y/N can easily reply with one simple answer. “Sure.”

[echoesofcamelot]

Hello, today I wanted to share with you my very own interpretation of this scene 👇 because it haunts me to this day.

The first thing we see after Kilgharrah says goodbye is the lake, and then Merlin slowly caressing Excalibur's pommel with longing.

Merlin is holding Arthur's sword. The sword Merlin made for him. The sword that made Arthur believe he could be king. The sword he has held so many times in so many battles. The pommel is still warm. Merlin is running his thumb over it, holding the ghost of Arthur's hand.

Oh, but this sword is more than Arthur's sword. It's a sword forged in a dragon's breath, the weapon that was able to kill Morgana. Possibly the only thing that could kill Merlin as well. Merlin is also holding a possibility. A key. He could use it. He could... He could follow Arthur once more.

Look at this terrible, terrible expression on his face as he looks at the blade. He's lost everything and he's got a way out at his fingertips. Literally.

And, for a moment, it almost looks like he is going to take it.

But Merlin wouldn't do that. Because if there really is a chance that Arthur will come back, then Merlin will be there for him. He will always choose Arthur.

So he decides to get rid of the sword. Because it's dangerous. It will always be a temptation.

And then.

Then this happens.

Look, I know it's supposed to be Freya. But, hell, no, it's not. I'm sure it's Arthur. I always assumed it was Arthur. It has to be. It's a very masculine forearm. And if you look closely at the shape of the fingernails you'll see that they look awfully similar to Arthur's.

This whole scene only makes sense to me if it's Arthur. So I'll always believe it's him, regardless of what the writers had planned. (After all, if you write, then you'll know that sometimes stories develop a mind of their own and find a way to tell themselves the way they are supposed to be, even if that goes againts the author's plans).

Because, look. Look at Merlin's reaction.

His features have lost all trace of hardness. There's sorrow, yes, and weariness. But there's also awe, and acceptace, and a new light in his eyes that almost seems like... hope?

That hand holding Excalibur is the proof that Arthur is really gone, and yet somehow he still exists. That hand holding Excalibur is Arthur's last goodbye, and a promise. I'm gone, Merlin, but I'm still here. And I will return to you some day.

It's right after this scene that we see Merlin finally saying goodbye to Arthur. He's seen he no longer inhabites his body, so he stops fighting, he stops denying. He accepts. He says goodbye. He lets go.

Arthur is gone, and Merlin is broken. He is saying goodbye to half of his soul. But he has seen Arthur's spirit, and he knows that a part of him is still alive. He knows for certain that his soul lives on.

And that is why I know Merlin will always have faith in Arthur's return. Because he knows that Arthur is truly there, somewhere in the lake of Avalon.

And, some day, he will return to Merlin.

[lucijawriteswords]

truck time | auston matthews

summary: you are met with a surprise as auston picks you up after practice, and a simple conversation about your game last night turns into so much more.

warnings: making out! so much angst. mutual pining, sexual tension, older brother's best friend auston, reader is insecure and always second guessing herself. a little fluffy here and there but really just a lot of angst and then a kiss at the end. very tame for me, i know. don't get used to it.

word count: 2.6k

A/N: hello hello hello! i'm sorry to have disappeared for so long. school is, as always, just a joy. and i have a new horse that i'm trying to put under saddle so that is taking just entirely too much of my time. anyways. enough about me! let's get to the story, shall we? apologies again because i did not edit this so there are likely typos. as always, let me know how you feel, what you want, who you want. i aim to please. thank you, as always, for reading, and now, enjoy the story!

you were trying hard not to cry, bouncing your throbbing leg, fidgeting with your fingernails. the bench of the picnic table you were sitting at was digging into your thighs and you knew the pattern was going to be pressed into your thighs, just another blemish amongst the bruises and blistered ankles of a hard, hard practice.

coach had skated you and your team hard today, citing last night’s game as the reason. a game you had won triumphantly, a 7-2 rout of the other team with two of your teammates getting hat tricks. but it was all in the third period. he said that if you and your teammates couldn’t produce consistently throughout all three periods, then winning didn’t even matter.

all you wanted after practice was a ride waiting for you, your sweet older brother john waiting in the car with your favorite food and open ears and seat heaters on. but he was busy, so he sent auston on his behalf. auston, who was, somehow, miraculously, free to pick up his best friend’s sister.

growing up, auston had seemed to be everywhere john was, and you were everywhere they were, despite being two years their junior. ice cream in the summer, family dinners, road trips, the summer fair- everywhere. auston and john had played hockey together until auston moved away during high school to play for the national program. since then, they’d stayed thick as thieves, and whenever auston somehow found himself back in arizona, he seemed to be everywhere john was, just like how it used to be. but now, here he was, without john in tow, picking you up from practice.

you heard the heavy tires and loud rumble of austin’s old truck, the one he kept here. the one you’d been in too many times to count. the door popped open and the thud of two heavy footfalls against pavement registered in your ears.

“hey, kid.” he drawled, the pet name ringing in your ears like a church bell, a welcome reprieve after the drilling whistles you’d been blasted with the past two hours. you grimaced in an attempt to smile.

he returned one, eyes questioning, before turning away and popping open the tailgate.

“hi.” you tossed your sticks in his general direction, hearing them clatter roughly into the bed. you bag followed suit, landing in the middle. auston’s head snapped up as he felt the tailgate sag as you hoisted yourself up, reaching for your bag to move it further up the bed. a warm hand stopped yours, hovering near the cloth handle.

"don’t worry about it, kid. i got this. just get in the truck.” his eyes were soft.

a soft smile- real this time- made its way onto your face, a quiet ‘ok’ leaving your lips as you slid off the tailgate and made your way around the side towards the passenger door.

sliding into the passenger seat and folding your legs up, your soft smile morphed into something more of a wince at the redness around your ankles. lace bite. you softy rubbed the fingers of one hand on the angry skin, the other hand reaching towards the center controls of the car for the seat heater, cranking it all the way up.

auston finally stopped fiddling in the trunk and snapped the cover down into place before shutting the tailgate. your eyes watched his figure in the rear view mirror as he made his way towards the front of the car. as he opened his door, your eyes (by no means on accident) raked across his shoulders and chest, noting the new fullness there.

“look strong, auston. they been working you hard up north?” his teeth flashed as he dropped himself into the seat, the truck bouncing under his bulk. he shook his head as he reached behind himself for his seatbelt, the smallest sliver of skin showing as his hoodie rose up. you found yourself drawing your legs closer to yourself.

“you know it, kid.”

“where’s j?” you wondered, pulling the arms of your sweatshirt down to cover your hands, impatiently waiting for the seat to warm you.

“he was running some errands before picking you up and got a flat on the highway. called a tow truck cause i guess he didn’t have a spare so he’s at the shop getting that fixed up. probably only an hour or two,” auston replied, hands flexing on the wheel as he pulled away from the curb.

“why didn’t he just call you?” you asked, shifting to face him, resting your head sideways against your headrest. “he wouldn’t have to pay you and you’d probably have it done before those guys at the shop even got the bolts out. you’re good at that type of thing.” he spared you a glance, a small grin breaking onto his face.

“why type of thing, exactly?”

you prickled under his gaze.

“oh, you know.” you returned, rubbing your thumb against the inside of your sweatshirt. “stuff with… your hands.” you trailed off, eyes falling and voice softening. something flickered in his gaze. he cleared his throat.

“how was practice?”

it was your turn to clear your throat. “bad,” you replied honestly, saw no benefit in keeping it from him. 

his gazed turned to you for a moment. “why? big win last night. you played like hell.”

your eyes widened, fixing themselves on his figure. “you were there?”

he scoffed. “course i was. cheered my ass off for you.”

you felt your mouth drop slightly, confusion pulling your eyebrows together. “i didn’t even know you were there,” you whispered, wonder laced in your tone. what would you have done, you wondered, if you had known? would you have scored four goals? five? would you have looked for him, for his figure in the stands, met his eyes with a smile? would you have walked out of the locker room, beaming and sweaty, to find him standing there, arms open, for you? 

you’d let go of those fantasies years ago. you’d always just been john’s little sister, ‘kid,’ the third wheel on their friendship bike. auston had been out of reach, unattainable- just two years older, but somehow a million light years away. you’d lived with feigned acceptance as girls came and went throughout highschool, had smiled and nodded and posed for pictures with them when they tagged along with you to auston and your brother’s games. you’d listened to their angry words when auston inevitably moved on, had let them drift away as plans for rides to games were no longer necessary, had monotonously deleted the photos on your phone. 

the fantasies, the dreams, the hazy imaginings of you in his jersey, cheering for him, traveling the continent with him, for him, sneaking onto the ice at whatever rink you found yourself at, just laughing and loving and reveling in each other. 

you’d pushed your feelings down for years, decided that once he moved to toronto, it was never going to happen. and so you loved him in secret, in childhood pictures in the collage of your phone background, in oddly timed facetime calls as he asked how to cook this, how to cook that, what the best way to get gear to stop stinking was. it never occurred to you that maybe, he was doing the same thing. 

you’d never dared to let yourself believe it before but maybe, just maybe, there was a reason auston had always moved on from  those girls. 

something different clouded auston’s voice, something gravelly and twisted. “what would you have done if you knew?” 

you laughed humorlessly, letting your head fall back against the weathered head rest. “not sure, aus. what would you have me do?” 

his response was instant. “i’d want you to look for me in the stands. wave at me or blow me a kiss or something.” he paused here, preparing himself- and you, quite possibly, for what he was about to admit. “i’d want you to come out of that locker room looking for me, with a big smile just for me. give me a hug, let me carry your bag and sticks to the car. maybe…” here he leveled you with a weary glance. “maybe let me kiss you goodnight when you get home.”

such honesty was not what you had expected. you were dumbfounded at the similarity between your fantasies, at the way they lined up perfectly, like the final edge piece of a puzzle snapping into place. your head lolled comfortably against the head rest, eyes boring into the faded ceiling of the cab. you realized, with a jolt, that you should probably say something. but you couldn’t figure out what.

“auston, i don’t know what to say… i never thought, no, well i mean i thought, but i never knew-”

he waved a hand at you, his jaw grinding as his adam’s apple worried his neck. “you don’t have to say anything. i shouldn’t have said anything. just want you to know. just… just want you.” his voice strained before dying with a crackle. he cleared his throat, resigning himself to stare at the road ahead, one hand gripping the wheel so tightly his knuckles shown white, the other fretting the hem of his sweatshirt. 

the silence grew and grew until the air shimmered and your seat was uncomfortable and your shirt was too tight. you, too, fidgeted, grumbling and cursing and trying to wriggle out of your sweatshirt, unclipping your seatbelt with a huff and tugging the thing over your head, too preoccupied with getting the heavy garment off to notice that your shirt was coming with it until you heard auston's muttered curse.

your face heated to an unbearable temperature, so hot that you had to crack the window. you dared to glance at him and found him with his jaw clenched, eyes locked firmly on the road, but the hand that had previously been playing with his hoodie was now sitting atop the center console.

"you're killing me, kid. that was mean. you gotta play fair," he grumbled, essentially whining at this point.

you didn't know what to say, so without giving yourself time to think or reconsider or second guess you laid your hand atop his, folding your fingers under his palm and lightly tracing the back of his hand with your thumb. you still said nothing. the only noise was the roaring of the tires against the road and the wind streaming in through your window, which did little to cool the suddenly far too hot car.

"i didn't do it on purpose." you whispered.

your eyes drifted to where your hands lay intertwined on the console before returning the road, nothing but field and dust and rocks behind, ahead, and beside you for miles.

you realized at the same time auston did.

your hand squeezed hard onto his as you felt the truck begin to slow and saw the turn signal lighting up the dark road as he pulled off onto some old, overgrown, unused farmhouse driveway.

the truck's engine purred softly before quieting, the whole thing rocking softly as he put it in park, twisting the key out of the ignition.

you gulped, gripped his hand tighter.

"do you-"

"i didn't-"

you pressed your lips together, a smile trying to fight it's way onto your face. he shook his head, lightly nodding towards you, signaling your you to speak. you shifted again, drawing your legs up onto the seat so that you were sitting criss-crossed, facing him.

you took a deep breath. "i didn't know you felt that way, auston. and i promise i wasn't trying to tease you just now. i just..." you trailed off, meeting his gaze to find his eyes already fixed on yours. you steadied yourself, bringing your other hand to where you were already holding one of his.

"i just didn't think that there was any way on earth that you could ever like me back. i've always been just john's little sister and my crush on you was just something that came naturally from you being my older brother's best friend. and then you left," your voiced cracked a little. his squeezed your hands lightly in his, bringing them to his mouth to press a light kiss to your knuckles.

you cleared your throat, sniffling. "you went to michigan. and then you got drafted. and i know it's only been a few years since then, and we're still really young, but i have never felt so strongly for anyone as i have for you. i mean-" a humorless, sobbed laugh. "i've never even liked anyone else. i've had to sit here and be friends with all your girls and now i have to stay here without you and it's been torture," you bit out, voice weak.

"every time you call me, asking for help to cook something or for girl advice it makes me want to claw my eyes out." you admitted, voice hoarse. "i hate that i'm not there with you, and stupidly, i hate that you have to call me if you need me. not- not me, i meant my help. i don't know, i'm rambling. but i just.... i really had no idea that you felt like that, and i've felt like that about you for my whole life and it just- i don't know. i'm gonna shut up." you trail off, eyes falling to your lap.

his hand around yours is warm, and it’s the only reminder that he is still in the vehicle with you because is completely, utterly, unnervingly silent.  you don’t dare to look up at him, scared of what you’ll find on his face, in his eyes.

some part of you is terrified that this is a sick joke, that he did this for a dare, because how in the world could auston possibly feel that way about you? about his best friends little sister? part of you believed that he still saw you as the gap toothed, pink waxed laces, smushed between them on the bench of auston’s first truck, pigtailed little girl. 

the silence was becoming unbearable. you lifted your head in exasperation, still too scared to meet his eyes. “auston, please say some-” 

you were cut off by the soft press of his lips against yours. his hand found a spot on the back of your neck, pulling you into him, drinking you in like you were oxygen. you sighed, loosing a breath you didn’t know you were holding on to as you melted into him, one of your hands wringing itself from his grasp to slide along his chest and fist in his sweatshirt there. 

the pieces of your heart, which you really hadn’t even known was broken, pulled themselves together, stitched themselves up with every press of his lips, every swipe of his tongue, every sharp breath through his nose, every groan as he fists your hair and pulls your head back to kiss you deeper than you thought was possible.

when you finally break apart, his eyes are glazed over with something that looks an awful lot like love. you can feel his heart beating rapidly underneath your hand on his chest.

and suddenly, there were no more unanswered questions, no more wishes and dreams of the shared life you both wanted. no more what-ifs and maybes. there was just this, just the two of you, together in his truck, surrounded by stars and the future.

[lavina-arts]

Hello everyone, friends, I need to talk to you about something important today...

As you know, I live in Turkey, and if you are Turkish like me, or have Turkish acquaintances who are not Turkish, or follow the developments in Turkey, you may have heard that access to several games and social media platforms in Turkey has been blocked these days.

These applications are not currently accessible in my country;

-X(Twitter)

- Instagram

-Roblox

-Wattpad

Apart from this, I don't know if there are any access blocks for other applications yet, but the Discord application will also be blocked today, and it is also planned to block the application called Tik Tok on August 13.

What I really want to talk about is that if access to the Tumblr application is blocked, I may suddenly have to leave the account and this time I cannot use my other account. I am really sorry for that, but unfortunately there is nothing I can do...

There were indeed valid reasons for these bans, but what really makes me angry is that they were immediately banned without doing anything about it...

We had no news about this. We just woke up this morning and.. BOOM! We cannot use any applications!

I cannot understand why they blamed everyone and did this instead of just closing the accounts that violated these bans. Moreover, these things do not work in this order, first a warning is given, then the accounts that do this are closed. If there is still no solution, then access to the applications will be blocked.

However, despite such an effective solution, they instantly close random applications without notifying people...

I'm not saying that applications shouldn't be closed, there were legitimate reasons to close them, but I'm trying to explain that they can't do it suddenly like this.

Long story short, there may be an access block to the Tumblr application in Turkey for any reason, so I'm telling you this so you don't worry if I don't post to the account for a long time.

Of course you will ask me this

"Why don't you use VPN?"

(For those who don't know: Vpn: A kind of interesting software that can allow you to use prohibited applications and sites)

Yes, there are people using VPN, but the problem is; Ever since this app access blocking scandal began, scammers have been using it to their advantage. They put people in an even more difficult situation by stealing people's private information such as bank accounts with fake VPN applications:(

Unfortunately, this situation also puts people in a difficult economic situation; There were many people selling on Instagram and making money by writing code on Roblox, and now they are all in a difficult situation. There has been a major unemployment problem in our country for a long time. Even people who got into the best universities cannot find a job, so now they had an advantage such as technology, but now it is being taken away from them. There is a high probability that applications such as YouTube and Facebook will be closed. Some YouTube users have already left their accounts, some People started sending videos titled "Farewell video before YouTube closes"...

I hope these problems will end somehow, because despite everyone's objections, my own country's rulers still do not listen to their own people!

I hope I don't have to leave my account, but if something happens, I apologize again, but as I said, there is nothing I can do :(

That's all I can say about this subject. If you have any other questions, you can ask me. I will try to help you as much as I can. Goodbye for now.

[neewtmas]

24 days of Appreciation

DAY 7

Hello! It's the 7th of 24 days of appreciation this month, where we shine a spotlight each day on those we appreciate in this fandom!

If you want to submit someone or something (for more info read here), you can do so here or just message me! If you wanna stay anonymous, either tell me or submit on anon.

Appreciation by me:

today my appreciation goes to the people behind @savelockwoodandco! We are all still so sad over the cancellation news and while I and many others oftentimes don't have the energy and mental capacity to continue the fight, you guys (i'm pretty sure you're more than one person whoops) have been fighting tirelessly for literal months at this point. If anyone wants to show support, it's so valuable to have all the information you provide in oneplace and just providing the information is so much work in and of itself tbh. I'm so thankful for your continued effort and I applaud you from the sidelines. The pure dedication you show for this fandom is worth so so much and I wanna make sure you feel appreciated for it🫶🏻💫

Appreciation by others (submissions):

by @edible-rat-vomit: i got a positivity submission 😇 hihi! edible rat vomit here :3 im here to appreciate a couple people but first all my mutuals!! i love y'all so much and it makes my day so much brighter to see all of you. i wish i could remember all of your @s but i am soo bad w remembering things.. thank you all for welcoming me into the lockwood and co fandom! now onto the specifics.. first we got @lucy-j-carlyle .. you are the strongest mf i know on this platform. you've lost so much recently (ur tumblr blog included, may she rest in peace) . you somehow keep going! @krash-and-co i cant say much here bc a lot has already been said.. but you are seriously hilarious. also kermit v kipps. i dont even need to say more @favcharacterpoll listen all i gotta say is im so thankful for u accepting the kermit v kipps bit @yveni y'all have yveni to thank for my amazing pfp! they are also the creator (along with their team) of the lockwood and co family portrait (i still cant get over this btw its so amazing)! you never fail to make me smile when i see you on my dash :) @smol-being-of-light im ngl i have no idea when we followed each other but you're so fun and i love reading ur posts. thank you for ur message in one of the previous positivity messages that was so sweet 🥹. i wish i could go on but this is actually the third time ive typed this out and i keep losing it smh.. anyways.. if ur name isnt on this list please know that im thankful for you and i love you lots ps thank u much to the wonder human behind this appreciation chain 🫶 ur dedication is fantastic

Show your appreciation and submit someone or something here :)

[mittensdragon]

Where are my reality shifters at?

Tarot Card Reading — Where am I on my shifting journey? 

“The range of our knowledge of reality is limited by our pre-existing beliefs, assumptions, and expectations.” —  Cynthia Sue Larson

Hello my peoples! I have come back from a long break, but I come bearing gifts! Today we have a reality shifting reading for all of my shifters 🥰 I hope you find this reading helpful for you today and that it assists you on your shifting journey. In this reading, many practices can pop up that are not reality shifting but somehow relates to it, such as astral projection and lucid dreaming! So let’s be open minded to that. 

As you read, pay attention to whether the information resonated with you or your life or not, if it doesn’t and you are confused then it’s a sign that pile is not for you. Nonetheless, thank you for your time, and if you’d like a more personal reading, visit my Etsy Shop:

Listings:

General Tarot Readings

Specific Tarot Readings

Tips! <3

Other sources for tips and readings:

CashApp

PayPal

Send me a dm or comment if you would like to have a reading but don’t have Etsy! 😊

Let’s begin! 😌

Choose a pile.

Pile One: The Cloud

Release

Big fluffy and red. Dreamy, very dreamy. I feel peace and like I’m floaty with this one. Perhaps your reality is a waiting room, or maybe you are a lucid dreamer. Whichever resonates, this pile is for you! Although it doesn’t have to resonate for this pile to be yours too. I am in a poetic mood today. :) let’s begin friends.

I’m not sure why, but I am getting something about being LGBTQ+. You may be a part of this, or you may be a supporter because you have family or friends who are. Either way, there is something that has to do with being LGBTQ+! If so, welcome, you are loved and accepted here.

Your cards are King of Hearts in reverse, The High Priestess, and Three of Wands. Just to reassure you, cards in reverse do not mean something is wrong or bad. In fact, I feel like the King of Hearts strongly suggests that this is someone you used to be, not who you are now. I feel like this leads you back to the LGBTQ message, which at some point in your life you were holding back a lot of… well you. This isn’t just LGBT, it’s all of you. Maybe you were holding strong beliefs that were hard to let go, stubborn is what I hear. But at some point, that was just enough for you. I see someone, like leaving a place with some luggage in hand. Like they were simply just done.

By leaving you became who you truly are, who you are meant to be. The High Priestess. Im hearing a goddess, go queens. Live the dream. 💜 

You became strongly intuitive, you follow your heart, you let yourself be guided instead of holding back. You let yourself be happy. You were probably guided to finding astral projection, lucid dreaming, and reality shifting. It became your thing. With The High Priestess I’m definitely getting night and dream vibes so maybe you’re practicing Lucid Dreaming and lean more towards astral projection. I’m strongly getting astral projection here. 

It seems you probably stumbled upon reality shifting last and you’re pretty new to it and definitely excited, I’m feeling. I also saw something about YouTube, so maybe this is how you found out. Definitely on the internet for sure. In the Three of Wands, it shows three little angel babies, and I feel this strongly represents you when it comes to reality shifting. I’m getting the impression that you don’t know where to start, you’re excited, it’s something new, and you feel like you’re everywhere. Just take a deep breath and slooow down.

You are being called to this and are receiving the help and guidance you need to succeed. I feel like this is something you can definitely flourish in, if you are consistent and determined enough. It may be a struggle now, but I know you got this.

In order to allow yourself to succeed more in this though, there is a person you need to let go of. I feel like this person is really confusing you, they are all you are focusing on right now but it’s just really confusing and they are holding you back. I feel like this person shows you one side and then completely flips at a different time. I’m getting like a sweet in private and tense in public type of thing or vice versa. Either way, this isn’t healthy for you and it’s something you need to let go.

I’m seeing someone sitting in criss cross position, holding their intertwined hands to their chest and then releasing this energy, opening their arms wide to release it into the air. And allowing peace into their hearts. Maybe this is something you do or could do, maybe meditation will help you let go of this confusing person and allow you to move one. Because you deserve to be at your highest. Don’t settle for less. 

Thank you for joining me today and allowing me to present this message to you. I hope this helps on your journey.

Pile Two: The Kitten

Growth

Hello pile two, welcome to your reading. Here we have Ace of Hearts, Ace of Swords, and Strength. I’m getting that you all have very reserved personalities, and you are very careful about what you want people to know about you, which is why I’m not getting too much info as I did with the previous pile. And that’s okay! I’m only getting the message that you need to hear, and that’s what is important.

You may be or may have been someone who was very emotional, for some reason I’m hearing “chaotic” but that may not resonate for most of you? We will see. It seems that you were always not sure of yourself, like your actions and I’m getting a lot of self doubt in general. You may have gotten pretty emotional when someone would doubt you and this would kick you down bad. It’s something you definitely relied on. I saw this in like a high school, so maybe you were a teenager when you used to be this way. And this definitely held you back from doing a lot and experiencing a lot. 

There is some sort of gap for me here, like a missing piece of the puzzle. But I feel like you know what I mean when I say that a certain situation made you flip. Maybe you were able to spend more time with yourself alone and this changed you completely and I mean drastically. Like people you knew would be surprised as to who you’ve become. You are more self-assured and confident in yourself. I’m seeing a mirror, so maybe you do affirmations in the mirror that help you move on throughout the day. I’m also seeing make up too, I feel like you just really had a glow up. 

Now you definitely approach things in a different way for sure, but how does all of this fit in with your shifting journey? It could be that this is something you manifested, maybe you shifted to this reality where you were more self-assured, or actually, maybe it is something you want to do. Whichever resonates with you best. 

Whether you have already achieved this growth or are going to, I know that you will turn out to be the best version of yourself. Like the strength card, you have no fear or doubts about anything and approach things in a better way than you did in your past. 

This definitely has a lot to do with your growth than reality shifting, so maybe you are simply taking a break from it in order to work on yourself. To make peace with yourself and this reality that you are in. Maybe you are coming out of the obsessive faze where everything is about reality shifting and constantly hydrating yourself, making tons of scripts, lifa apps and you just ended up tiring yourself out. I get it, I’ve been there too, but being so hyper fixated on shifting will not get you to shift. But you know that ;).

An opportunity either will present itself or has presented itself for you, now whether this has to do with shifting or not, I’m not too sure. It may be a job opportunity that keeps you busy, and with The Star in reverse it seems that this opportunity will come when you are pretty much drained. If it has to do with shifting, you’ll probably get the opportunity to shift when you’re already tired and end up exhausted again. This ties back in to how you used to be, overexerting yourself to the point that you just can’t anymore. 

Don’t do this :(

If this is related to a job, it could be that it’s well paying but you won’t have time to practice what you want to anymore which will leave you drained. Not even enough energy to do your regular routine in the morning, not enough rest to function properly throughout the day. If this happens, please ask yourself, is it really worth it to risk your mental and physical health for a job?

I hope this reading has helped you on your shifting journey and gave you a little push. Have a great day/night! 🖤

Pile Three: The Doll 

Letting Go

Hello, my wonderful peoples, welcome to your reading. I hope you find today’s pick a pile helpful and that it resonates for you! Let’s get started.

Your cards are Eight of Swords, The Chariot, The Lovers in reverse, Princess of Pentacles (Page) in reverse, Two of Hearts (Cups) in reverse, and The Magician.

I am seeing a theme about love and romance here, but since the two cards are reverse and the Eight of Swords at the start, I want to assume that there was a lover that was holding you back. Perhaps you felt trapped in this relationship, it was something difficult to get out of before you gathered the courage to leave, The Chariot. I feel like for some time you did not trust yourself because of this lover, and maybe you still have a hard time with that. This relationship killed your inspiration.

Something tells me that you used reality shifting as a way to escape from this relationship, but because you felt trapped here, they were holding you back from your true potential. It's possible that you had a few readings and signs before this and now that led you to leave “captivity” is what I’m seeing here. That or it was something you’re considering now, and this is confirmation.

Whichever it may be, it really seems important for you to know that you are very capable of reaching your true potential, you can do many things, it's just something you have to unlock within yourself through a lot of healing and inner work. You can shift, you can astral project and lucid dream. It may sound cheesy, although true, it takes practice and persistence. 

Right now, you are in a state of whether you should trust your senses or not. It’s like something is blocking your intuition, preventing you to go further and stopping from being your best self. This is that “stuck” feeling we see earlier.

There’s a feeling of “sudden realization” as well, so maybe it's something barely coming to your senses.

This does feel short! But it feels like this message was definitely some clarity you may have needed. 

Thank you for reading! 🖤

[kindahoping4forever]

Blood Moon Lit // Ashton Irwin

Hello! Thank you to everyone who continues to engage with my masterlist and ask about my writing even though the fics have slowed down again - even as a writer, I somehow can't find the words to describe how encouraging it is. It's because of that encouragement that I've got a new fic for you today! I've been working on some longer form stuff (partly to blame for my absence) and since those projects are gonna take some time, I thought it'd be fun to sneak in a quick, light piece to tide us all over. The lunar eclipse that took place last week (sadly rained out in LA) provided a burst of inspiration and I ran with it!

As always thank you to @cal-puddies, it's more apparent than ever that I don't know how to do this without her lol

Warnings: Friends to lovers!Ash, an overabundance of flirty banter, an obnoxious amount of references to Ash's beard. A conversation about weed. Protected first time sex.Just some classic fluffy smut vibes.

Word Count: 6585

Masterlist // Ko-Fi linked above

Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated!

“You know, according to the Farmer’s Almanac---”

“How many times do I have to tell you that’s an absurd way to begin a sentence?”

Ashton tosses a crumpled up napkin in your direction, good-natured glare on his face. “If you’re gonna invite yourself over to my house to watch the eclipse, it’s only fair that you listen to my moon anecdotes.”

“Alternate perspective: if you’re going to be offering up moon anecdotes to a captive audience, you should spice up your presentation. You’re a professional entertainer, Ash, you should understand.”

You cackle watching your friend’s face twist and contort as he struggles not to laugh at your ribbing. He scratches at his beard, aggravated and amused, and you can’t help but smile. He’s so expressive, you love getting a reaction out of him.

“Next time, you can throw your own damn eclipse party, I don’t care how lame the view at your apartment is,” he declares, knocking on the kitchen island for emphasis.

You shrug, “Lucky for me, the next lunar eclipse isn’t until 2025, so I’ve got time to find some better digs.”

“I’ve got time to find better friends,” he mutters under his breath, giggling at the sound of your offended gasp. Apparently he loves getting a reaction out of you as well.

You pout, “Aww, if you didn’t want me here, would you really have gone to this much trouble?” You hug his broad shoulders, cozying up to him, smiling at how he seems to melt against you. You gesture at the spread of snacks on the tray in front of you. “Crescent sandwiches, moon pies, Mars bars, Milky Ways…”

“Not a lot of moon specific snacks out there, had to extend the theme to the entire solar system,” he chuckles, nudging you with a pack of Starburst, gesturing for you to follow him outside.

It’s not that you invited yourself over to Ash’s tonight, it’s just that when you complained how obscured the view is at your place and he responded by mentioning how much he loves watching the moon from his garden every night… Well, that sounds like an invitation, now doesn’t it?

You trail behind him as he sets the food on a table in the backyard and pulls two bottled waters out of a nearby cooler, handing one to you.

You grab a sandwich off the tray. “Do you want to finish your almanac anecdote, buddy?” You ask sweetly as you settle in, laying across the patio couch he’s set up.  

Distracted, he pats the pockets of the button down shirt he’s wearing. “You’re only being nice to me now because I’m feeding you," he sighs.

“Well, yeah, that’s the key to most positive interactions with me. We’ve known each other for how long and you’re just realizing this?” You crack, grabbing the lighter out of your shorts pocket and tossing it to him.

Ashton snorts at your joke and bends down to light the candles on the table. You may be friends but you’re also human and can't resist noticing how well his jeans fit him, especially when pulled tight across his ass like they are right now. The sound of him dropping the lighter back onto the table stirs you from your thoughts and you tune back into the conversation.

“...So that’s why some cultures advise people not to eat during an eclipse,” he shares proudly, sitting in a chair across from you.

“Interesting,” you respond breezily, giggling as he sticks his tongue out at you, clearly able to tell you weren’t paying attention.

“Listen, I don’t see you attempting any trivia to pass the fuckin’ time,” he snarks. 

“I didn’t know there was gonna be a pop quiz, dude,” you gripe. “Besides, why are you worried about filling time anyways? If you went to the trouble of themed snacks, I know there's no way you didn't slap together a playlist."

"Ah, I have been perceived," he admits with a grin and with a few swipes of his phone, "The Killing Moon" by Echo and the Bunnymen begins pouring from the speakers just outside the house.

The eclipse begins just after midnight and the full visibility - and accompanying "blood moon" coloring - isn't due for almost another two and a half hours so the two of you vibe, snack and banter for a while, occasionally peering up at the sky and commenting on if you think the moon looks different yet or not. 

After about an hour, Ash disappears inside for a few minutes and returns holding two cups of steaming hot coffee, the pink blanket from his living room couch slung over his shoulder.

"How'd you know?" You coo, beaming up at him as he spreads the soft material over your legs.

"Because I know you," he laughs, watching as you warm your hands on the mug he just handed you. "Offered you sweats to come out here, you refused and still spent the entire time trying to yank that hoodie - which I expect back by the way - over your legs."

You defend your choice, "I like the cool air on my legs!" 

"Why is that such a girly thing? The oversized hoodie with the tiniest shorts? Like are you hot or cold? Pick one."

"Says the man who went inside to get his cozy jacket and yet hasn't thought of buttoning his shirt."

"Maybe I like the cool air on my chest," he mimics you with a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh, is that why your nips always look ready to cut glass?"

He nearly spills his coffee laughing. "You been checkin' out my nips, baby?"

"Nah, just conscious of sharp hazards and when I should be wearing protective eyewear," you joke, ignoring the flush you involuntarily feel when he casually calls you 'baby' like that.

Ashton giggles gleefully as he turns his attention to the sky. "These clouds are making it hard to tell what's supposed to be there, eclipse-wise," he complains. He crosses over to your couch and in one easy motion, lifts your legs up and places them in his lap as he sits down. He points, "That right there? That's moving, right? Must be a cloud. But what's that next to it?"

If you're being honest, you can't see what he's talking about too well from this angle but you're not sure you're ready to move and give up the feeling of his legs warming yours, of his hands subconsciously drumming on the blanket covering you. You like feeling him close. 

"I mean… you can still kinda see light through it so it's probably cloud, yeah?" You reach for your phone to check the weather. "Damn, why is there so much coverage though, didn't you say it's not supposed to rain until the morning?"

"Yeah not ‘til like 5 or 6," he answers. He squeezes your legs. "By the way, if it starts before that, you're staying here. I don't like you driving home in the middle of the night and in a storm."

"Whatever you say, Dad." 

He scoffs, face coloring ever so slightly. “Excuse me for caring about you staying safe.”

He looks damn good when he’s embarrassed and you decide you’d like to see more. “Sorry, you’re right. Whatever you say… Daddy?”

“Oh, fuck off,” he laughs, a little too loud, a little too hard. Cheeks now an adorable shade of pink, he playfully shoves your legs off his lap. “Get outta here,” he adds for good measure.

“Rude,” you accuse, grinning as you catch yourself before you fall off the couch, adjusting your position to sit next to him. 

You steal a glance over at him as he looks upwards again: his curls messy from laying around, shirt askew and exposing a generous amount of chest, chest you know to be warm and solid and full of hair that tickles your face every time he pulls you into a hug when he’s wearing a shirt like that. He looks nice. Comfortable. Comforting. You want him closer and you’re contemplating how to achieve that when he suddenly gets up from his seat.

The disappointment that runs through you is mercifully temporary as Ash drags the cooler over in front of the couch to use as an ottoman. He plops down next to you again and stretches out, putting his feet up, sighing in satisfaction. You do the same and use the opportunity to toss the end of your blanket over him, scooting closer so that you’ll both fit under it. You rest your head on his shoulder and he doesn’t seem to mind, just like you don’t mind the designs his fingers begin tracing on your knee.

“Can I ask something?” Your voice breaks the silence. The designs stop. Interesting.

“Depends,” he says wryly. He seems nervous. You like it.

You throw him a curveball. “Are we not smoking tonight?”

He snorts, nudging your knees with his. “Take over my garden, eat my snacks, now you want my weed?”

“See, I’d argue that having someone over to literally just stare at the moon for hours implies drug use is on the agenda,” you muse. “I’d argue that Ashton Irwin having someone over to his house in general implies there’d at least be an offer.”

He pokes your side as a means of protest and you squeal in response. “Truth be told, I thought about putting a couple joints on the table but I didn’t want you falling asleep before the big show even started,” he explains, mischief dancing in his eyes.

You drop your jaw in exaggerated offense. “That’s never---”

“Your birthday, my birthday, select dinner parties, two weeks ago when we watched that movie… that one time I think we were watching the Olympics…”

“OK, OK, I get it… Jesus,” you concede, amused at how much he’s enjoying calling you out like this. “Listen, maybe if you didn’t smoke fuckin’ industrial strength weed…”

“Maybe if you’d bring your own stash every once in a while instead of just mooching off mine,” he zings back, squeezing your thigh to make sure you know he’s kidding. He lets you pout for a few beats before he adds in a notably softer voice, “I actually did go to the shop the other day and picked up some of that hybrid you told me you liked. Maybe if this goddamn moon ever does what it’s supposed to do, I’ll break out with it.” 

You offer him a fond smile. “Ya ol’ softie,” you tease, ruffling his hair. Your logic brain tries to convince you it was because you wanted to annoy him but the impulsive part of you suspects you just really wanted to touch him for some reason. 

In a move that appears to surprise even himself, Ashton closes his eyes and contentedly leans into your touch. He attempts to course correct by peering at the sky and observing, “The moon’s definitely gotten darker… but that storm really looks like it’s moving in quicker than they said it would, there’s even more clouds than before.”

“Gonna be such a waste if we can’t even see the blood moon after all this,” you comment.

“Ouch, I’m having fun hanging out with you too,” he cracks, nudging you with his knees again. You don’t think his body has been out of contact with yours since he sat back down. Interesting. 

You bump his shoulders with yours. “So fucking sensitive,” you laugh, shaking your head. “Like I probably wouldn’t have been hanging here tonight anyways.”

“That’s true,” he agrees. “You’d definitely already be asleep on my couch by now.”

“Oh my god, Ash, I do not pass out here that often!”

“Why’d you think I served you a giant cup of coffee at 1 AM?” 

“You’re actually the worst person I know, congratulations.”

“Just figure you took the whole ‘make yourself at home’ thing a bit too literally.”

You turn to stare daggers at him and the resulting burst of laughter he lets out is so intense it echoes into the night.

“As if I'd be able to fall asleep out here anyways, I’m fucking freezing,” you grumble. He takes a breath to respond but you cut him off. “And I know it’s my fault for not borrowing the sweatpants, we’re all aware, the media will be calling for comment in the morning.”

His laughter continues and though you’re committed to your performance as a pitiful, mocked guest, watching him react to your plight is so endearing, you’re having a hard time keeping a straight face yourself.

He finally stops long enough to gasp out some breaths and wipe his eyes. “Aww, I’m sorry, baby,” he says, somewhat sincerely, though you can still detect a faint chuckle in his voice. He tries again. “You’re still cold, though, for real?”

“Yeah, dude, the temperature’s had to have dropped at least ten degrees since we’ve been out here.”

You’ve barely gotten through half of your sentence before Ash is pulling your body closer, laying your head on his chest, tucking you inside his jacket and wrapping his arms around you. “How’s that?” He asks, vigorously rubbing your arm.

“Um…” Your mind is blank and suddenly you swear you’ve never had a thought in your life, the concept of language is entirely outside of your grasp. All you know is you wanted him close and now Ashton is literally all around you. You take a deep breath to reset your mind but it only makes things worse, he smells incredible.

He reads your stammering negatively and starts rambling, "I thought about setting up that little fire pit for us but I didn't want to light things up too much and take away from the view." He continues fussing over you, holding you tighter. "I could see if I can do it real quick…"

“No, Ash… it’s fine, I’m fine,” you quickly insist, unwilling to give up this embrace for any reason. Trying to play it cool, you quip, “Plus it’s getting late, can’t have me getting too cozy, anyways.”

Your humorous sidestep provides enough of a misdirect and the two of you lay in comfortable silence for a bit. It’s long enough for you to finally relax into him and start thinking about how nice and natural this feels, how you kind of want him on you like this all the time, how you’re not sure if you’ve ever felt this warm and content or if you’ll ever feel this way again. 

Unfortunately it’s also long enough for you to start overthinking things and now you’re wondering if he can feel how fast your heart is beating, if he’s noticed all the subtle breaths you’ve been forcing yourself to take. You pause. OK, his heart feels like it’s beating pretty fast too. Wait. Really? Shit, thinking about his heart beating fast is making yours beat even faster now. The fuck?

He’s not… you’re not… right? You’re obviously aware that Ashton is an attractive man. Super charming. Thoughtful. Caring. And yeah, you get along great. He understands you, listens to you, confides in you. Sure, you have chemistry. All friends do, don’t they? 

He senses that something’s up with you and you swear you’ve never felt anything as intense as his hand squeezing your shoulder as he quietly asks, “You OK?”

You look up at him… since when is he this gorgeous? The sleepy smile on his face, creating deep dimples in his cheeks and friendly crinkles around his eyes, eyes filled with equal parts curiosity and concern for what’s going on with you. The dark beard on his face draws attention to his perfectly pink lips, lips that he nervously licks and catches between his teeth while he waits to hear what you have to say. Lips that you’re definitely staring at now. Lips that you’ve never given this much intentional thought to. Ashton’s lips. Fuck.

“Yeah, yeah, all good,” you nod, tearing your eyes away from his suddenly irresistible features. Desperate to distract yourself from your thoughts, you ask, “Got any more moon anecdotes for us?”

“Pfftt, why? So you can make fun of me some more?” He replies pitifully, jutting out his lower lip in an exaggerated pout.

Those goddamn lips. Fuck.

"It was a genuine question!” You sit up and train your eyes on the clouds, figuring it’s best not to look at the man sitting next to you until you figure out exactly what your brain is doing. “Might as well learn something while we wait.”

He giggles, “Ah, ‘might as well.’ My favorite conversation prompt!” You jab at him and he giggles harder. “I dunno, what kind of anecdotes do you want? You clearly thought my almanac shit was lame.”

You laugh, “Because it matters so much what I think?” The tiny shrug he gives in response gives you a butterfly feeling in the pit of your stomach. Your brain needs a channel change ASAP. “Give me some of your hippie dippie anecdotes. Like, we know why the moon is doing this but what does it mean?” 

Ash grins. “You’re still making fun of me but I’ll allow it.” He purses his lips and strokes his beard while he thinks of what topic to present to you. “Well… you know all eclipses can be considered symbolic, spiritual events.”

“Sure, everyone knows that.”

He squints, unsure whether or not you’re being serious but unphased regardless. “But did you know that emotionally a lunar eclipse is about three times more powerful than a solar one?”

“Oh?”

“You seriously want to know?” He asks, looking you over in a way you’re assuming is meant to be playfully skeptical but makes you feel flushed nonetheless.

Your laughs blend together as you elbow his side. “Yes, you weirdo! You’ve been trying all night to tell me about the moon, now’s your shot!”

He begins explaining this theory, animatedly detailing bits of ancient mythology for context. You listen with genuine intent but you also find yourself focusing on the way he’s talking to you, the excitement behind his eyes as he shares his knowledge, how he uses his hands to punctuate his ideas. Have his hands always been so large and attention grabbing? You try to zero in on his words but unfortunately, that brings you back to his lips, which are wrapping around every word he says in the most inviting way.

In an effort to remove the visual conundrum of Ashton entirely, you lay against him again. Without breaking his train of thought, he recalibrates, arms coming back to gently cradle you, voice dropping to a softer tone. “...So it’s basically like you’re getting all the effects from a full moon and an eclipse all at once,” he summarizes. 

“Oh, I guess I never thought of it like that before,” you think out loud. You smile because you practically hear him buzzing at your interest. “Both of those events are already centered around transformation, so combined that’s a lot of energy being put towards change.”

“Mmm hmm. And this one’s a blood moon too, which also fits that theme.”

“I thought a blood moon was more like… destruction. Chaos. That’s why those tattoos of yours make so much sense,” you tease.

He cackles loudly. “Can’t give a guy a break for one second!” You look up to flash him an innocent smile and he affectionately rolls his eyes before going back to the conversation. “It can mean those things. But I’d say those are forms of change, right? And it can also symbolize rebirth, which is change.”

“True.”

He’s quiet for a moment before he launches into his next idea. “I really like how it all works together to form a bigger conversation about exploration, evolution.” He waits for the inquisitive glance he knows is coming from you and when you deliver, he continues. “So a full moon is full so that’s an opportunity to think on what you’re grateful for, the fullness in your life, right? But you can also use those feelings to set your intentions by the full moon, what you want your next phase to contain. Evolution.”

“OK…” You nod.

Fuck.

“And then an eclipse is a harbinger for change… could be an ending, could be a beginning.”

“Could be both,” you point out.

He squeezes you encouragingly. “Exactly! And then the blood moon is interesting because it’s, you know, refracted sunlight - literally light shining through the darkness. So that’s connected to intentions hidden below the surface…” He pauses long enough that you look up to see why he stopped talking and he locks eyes with you. “Evolving something you maybe thought you were already content with… or exploring wants and desires you didn’t even know were there.”

You trust your face to remain neutral while your mind races. Evolving something? Exploring wants and desires? It’s all a bit too on the nose… maybe you’re reading too much into things, looking for excuses to be feeling the way you’re feeling, thinking what you’re thinking. But the way he looked at you when he said that… you’ve never been smoldered at before but hey, apparently every aspect of tonight’s moon is super gung ho about new experiences so why not?

Ash holds your gaze, looking at you somehow both patiently and expectantly as he waits for the conversation to continue. Your logic brain and your impulse brain have differing ideas on what an appropriate response would be so you buy yourself some time. 

"I mean… I think there's definitely something to all that but it also seems like a good opportunity for people to be reckless and then just blame it on the moon if it doesn't go the way they wanted."

Soft smile on his face, he shrugs. “I don’t know if it really matters to be honest, whether it’s an actual influence or just helps you frame your perceptions differently? Maybe that safety net of ‘the moon made me do it’ gives people the courage they need to act on feelings they felt they couldn’t otherwise.” His eyes stay fixed on you while he speaks. “Doesn’t make their actions any less valid. Inspiration is still inspiration.”

Fuck. 

He definitely just snuck a peek at your lips.

Fuck.

Logic brain and impulse brain are arguing louder than ever… but curiosity brain decides to drown them both out and you find yourself coyly replying, “Well then… are you feeling inspired tonight, Ash?”

The corners of his mouth curl into something more teasing than a smile but softer than a smirk. His fingers brush along your jaw before hooking under your chin to tilt your head towards him. 

Fuck. This is really happening.

You're not sure what's louder: the voice in your head screaming excited obscenities at you, your shallow, shuddered breathing or your heartbeat pounding in your ears.

You lean in to meet Ashton halfway and his lips finally brush against yours. Those lips. Ashton’s lips. They're softer than you expected and sweet, still faintly tasting of the desserts you shared earlier. His lips are undemanding, applying gentle pressure, moving slowly, unrushed. The kiss is commanding but cautious. Persuasive but respectful. Simultaneously a screaming exclamation and a tentative question, both eagerly awaiting your response.

You expect your brain to be bombarding you with a million questions and concerns but you're stunned to hear… nothing. No racing thoughts, no self-conscious reprimands. Your mind has suddenly found peace, content to be exploring… whatever this is.

You eventually break apart and he studies your face, clearly trying to gauge your reaction to this unexpected territory. Your brain doesn’t offer up any coherent thoughts, let alone words to say, so you pull him back in, opting to let your lips silently share with him how you’re feeling. He lets out a satisfied hum against you, reciprocating your energy and your mouths move together frantically, your skin tingling both from excitement and from the friction of his beard.

Without even realizing you're moving, your hands tangle in his curls, pulling him closer as your tongue swipes over his lips, seeking permission to deepen the kiss. His hands settle on the back of your neck, thumbs lightly stroking your cheeks as he accepts your invitation to finally kiss you with the full force of his passion. 

The next time you break for air, you waste no time in adjusting the blanket so that you have room to straddle his lap. He delightedly chuckles your name as you settle on top of him.

“This feels like one of those reckless things you were talking about,” he teases, running his hands up and down your sides.

“Mmm hmm,” you lilt, leaning in to peck along his jaw on your way to tongue at his earring, an idea you’ve been fixated on for most of the evening. 

He groans deliciously as you catch the tiny hoop between your teeth, giving it a light tug before you move your attention back to his lips. “Do we need to take a beat and think this through?” He asks before capturing your face between his hands and planting his most heated series of kisses yet.

You shiver at the way he caresses your cheeks, at the realization that his hands are large enough to cover basically your entire face; Ashton assumes you’re trembling from the cold and pulls away to reposition the blanket around your shoulders. “Oh, this is clearly a huge mistake,” you answer, tone unconcerned as you run your fingers through the chest hair peeking out from his shirt.

He giggles, ticklish at your touch, as he brings you back in. “Definitely in ‘ruining the friendship’ territory,” he laments with a grin. 

“Irreparable damage being done,” you agree, smiling back, closing the space between you. The kisses seem to increase in intensity each time you break apart and come together again and you soon hear yourself murmuring at the feeling of his hands giving your ass a light squeeze. You roll your hips in response and can’t help whimpering again when you find him half hard beneath you. Ash. Hard for you.

You never considered yourself a greedy person but the more you make out with Ash, the more you’re fascinated by it. It’s satisfying, it’s electrifying, it’s… Ash. You want to feel everything he has to offer, you want to feel him everywhere, you want to feel overwhelmed by him. More. You just need to feel more. More of Ash.

“Do you care?” He asks, gently tugging your hair back so he can nip at your neck.

“About destroying our relationship?” You joke breathily as his beard scratches at your tender skin. You grind in his lap a little more and the groan he gives you in return makes you feel lightheaded. “The better question is: if we’re gonna do something foolish, how stupid do we want to be?”

Ashton bucks his hips against you and you moan, louder than you mean to. He licks his lips hungrily before replying, “I mean… I have no problem admitting I’m having some pretty dumbass thoughts tonight.”

“Just tonight?” You giggle, squealing as he playfully tosses you onto the couch to lay on your back, slotting himself between your legs. His mouth attaches to your neck again while his hands slip under the hem of your sweatshirt, fingertips chilly against your skin, a pleasantly surprised hum escaping him when he grazes your bare breast. “Wanted to be comfy,” you shrug, arching your back to encourage him to keep touching you. 

His large hands wander on your body, unlocking a newfound level of desire for you and the urgency with which you kiss him is a testament to that. You writhe under him, mewling at the way his hardness feels against you. He grins against your lips, hand traveling down to play with the hem of your shorts. “I know my answer but how stupid do you want to be?”

You watch him closely as you guide him under your shorts, pressing his hand to your clothed center, letting him feel the heat between your legs, the wet spot that’s been forming since he sat down next to you. He meets your challenge and pushes your panties aside; he curses under his breath as he drags his fingers through your arousal, swirling light circles on your clit, all while maintaining eye contact with you.

“Mmm… Ash…”

“Yeah? Like that?” He rasps, clearly affected by watching you react to his touch.

You nod, gently pressing on his hand to receive slightly more pressure. Your head spins at how intimate it is to look directly into his eyes as he pleasures you, to feel so completely seen as you moan for him. It’s got you feeling needy and you pull him back up to your lips, seeking more connection with him.

His teeth nip at your bottom lip, fingers still teasing when he breaks the kiss, groaning into your mouth, “So wet.” He raises his fingers to his mouth, noisily sucking his fingers clean. You pant beneath him, restless, and he asks in an earnest, strained voice, “Tell me what you want, baby.”

It’s a simple request and yet one of the hottest things you’ve ever heard. “Wanna be so… so fuckin’ stupid with you.” You reach to palm him through his jeans. "Think you can run inside and grab a condom before we talk some sense into ourselves?"

Ash grins as he plants an impassioned kiss on you before taking off for the house. You make the couch more comfortable, putting a pillow for your head at one end and spreading the blanket out at the other, ready for you to crawl under. You're shimmying out of your shorts and underwear when he reappears, protection in hand.

"Afraid I was gonna change my mind that quickly?" You joke, wincing at the cold air on your naked bottom half as you toss your clothes aside.

He snorts and gestures to the room you entered the patio from. "I had some condoms in the den, so."

"Oh my god, are you one of those guys that keeps condoms in every room of the house 'just in case'?" You smirk at him as you lay back down. You take his slightly exasperated sigh as your answer and you can't fight the urge to tease further, coughing out a quiet, "Whore."

"And yet I'm not the one pantsless in some dude's backyard at 2 AM," he teases back, lightly slapping your ass as he covers you with the blanket. 

He sits at the end of the couch, helping you get situated before stripping himself. You love the spontaneity of the situation but you have to admit you wish you could see him better; your imagination is going wild as the late night darkness seems to amplify the smack of his cock hitting his stomach, the hiss he lets out as he strokes himself before rolling the condom on.

You hold the blanket open for him to climb inside and on top of you again. He smiles softly at you, offering a slow kiss as one hand slips under your sweater again, the other between your legs. His tongue teases yours, licking into your mouth with precision while his fingers play over your clit and you start to wonder what it’d be like to feel his tongue on your pussy instead, his beard scraping against your inner thighs, your fingers tangled in his hair, pushing and pulling to where you need him most.

The fantasy elicits a moan from you and Ashton takes that as a prompt. He asks quietly, “Ready?" You nod, pecking at his lips once more as you feel his tip nudging at your entrance. He begins to push in and your groans mix together in a sensual harmony.

“Oh… holy fuck, Ash,” you sputter, gripping at his shoulders as he continues to slide in. Everything about Ash is big so you can’t say you’re surprised but the stretch you’re feeling is unlike anything you’ve experienced and you’re immediately craving more.

He pauses to check in with you. “You alright?”

“Mmm hmm,” you exhale, playing with the curls at the back of his neck. You crack, “Lotta things about your personality are just suddenly making a lot of sense right now.”

He giggles and rolls his eyes. “You really making digs at me while I’m inside you?”

“You know I like to keep you humble.”

He bottoms out and you moan together; he leans down, his beard tickling you as he sucks a mark onto your neck. You trace along the seam of his jacket, appreciating the moment to adjust, until you start to get impatient and try rocking yourself against him.

You feel him smile against your skin. “Easy,” he rasps, holding your hips still as he slowly starts to move inside you.

“Oh my god, that was sexy… don’t be sexy, that’s too confusing for me,” you ramble playfully.

He laughs loudly. “‘Don’t be sexy?’ We’re literally having sex.”

“I know but like… it’s us. Don’t you think it’s weird for it to be this hot?”

“No?” He replies with a hint of incredulity. He curses under his breath as he increases his pace a little. “Haven’t you ever thought about this before?”

“Not really?” You think out loud, noting that he almost looks disappointed at your admission. “I mean it’s probably crossed my mind in an abstract sense but not in a ‘that’s something I actively want to happen, that’s something that could happen’ sense.”

Ash hooks one of your legs around his hip and you breathe out a tiny ohmygod at his next thrust that makes him smirk. “Interesting.”

“So I take it you’ve thought about this before?”

“Not in an ‘actively wanting it to happen’ way but more in a ‘that could definitely be fun’ way,” he shrugs. He grinds his hips into you and the friction on your clit causes you to whimper. “Gotta admit I have spent a bit of time wondering what that sound would be like.”

"Godddd why is that hot?" You whine, rolling your hips to match his movements. 

He half-chuckles, half-moans as you move together. "Hate to be the one to break it to you but… there's a possibility you might be attracted to me."

"No, that can't be it," you jokingly dismiss, pulling him down into a heated kiss.

You fuck back against him with greater force and he gasps your name. "Fuck…" He huffs, already sounding spent. "You feel… so fuckin' good around me… Takin’ it so well."

His praise goes straight to your core and you grab at his back, loving the way he feels on top of you but wishing you could feel his skin instead of his coat. Your brain suggests maybe next time but you push the thought aside.

"Never felt so full before," you admit with heavy breath. "God… can’t believe it feels this good. You’re making me feel so good, Ash.”

You wrap both your legs around his waist and the new angle instantly gets an audibly enthusiastic reaction from both of you. The shift allows him to drive into you faster, harder, deeper and Ash can tell from all your tiny whines, heated moans and revelatory sighs of his name that you’re well on your way to getting what you need.

“Love hearing you,” he groans, voice straining as he tries to keep control. “You make my name sound so good, baby.”

Your brain decides that hearing him call you ‘baby’ in this context is somehow the most erotic thing that’s ever happened and you give a long whimper as you slide your hand between your bodies to rub at your clit, chasing the orgasm you can feel sparking deep within. 

You feel him hesitate slightly, as if he’s wondering if he should help you out. “Keep… perfect… just like that,” you murmur, grabbing his ass, pulling him closer to you. “So… so close… oh god, Ash…”

“That’s so fucking hot, oh my god,” he pants, watching you touch yourself while he fucks you. “Working so hard for it, baby… gonna cum for me? Gonna let me feel it? Wanna feel it so bad, baby, wanna feel you cum.”

A strangled cry escapes your throat as your orgasm crests and you begin pulsing around him. You gasp and moan, the waves of pleasure washing over you again and again as he continues snapping his hips into you. You hear a variety of profanities followed by a long groan of your name before Ash’s hips stutter and he cums with a shout.

There’s a few solid beats where it’s clear neither of you know how to proceed, what the immediate afterglow should look like. He’s awkwardly hovering above you, head hanging down, arms slightly quivering as he fights the urge to collapse from exhaustion.

“Well, no reason to get shy now,” you declare, pulling him to lay on top of you, rubbing his back while he catches his breath.

He laughs warmly, allowing himself to settle for a minute before raising up and asking quietly, “Can I kiss you?”

It’s a silly question, considering you’re both still naked from the waist down, but for once, your instinct isn’t to make a joke.

You hold his face in your hands as you pull him in and the kiss you share is representative of the encounter you just shared: sweet, surprisingly erotic and appreciative of each other’s presence.

Smiles decorate both your faces as you break apart. He sits up and reaches for the stack of napkins on the table, handing you a few as he ties off the condom and wraps it in one. You’re almost done cleaning yourself up when you hear him chuckling to himself and look over to see him squinting at the sky. Before you get the chance to ask what he’s laughing at, you jump at the feeling of a stray raindrop landing on your thigh. 

“You’re kidding,” you gasp, taking a look at the sky yourself. “Where’d the fucking moon go?!”

He grins, standing to slip his pants on. “Can’t really be mad that we got distracted and missed the rise of the blood moon - seems like it was probably never visible to us because of these rain clouds.”

“That’s ridiculous,” you grumble, getting dressed so you can help Ash clean up the table. You think for a second and then laugh, “How long until you tell me what the rain symbolizes?”

Ashton giggles, playfully bumping into you as he grabs the blanket to take inside. “It’s not dissimilar from the eclipse, actually. Lots of introspection, mindfulness. Beginnings. Contrasts between light and darkness, the acknowledged and unspoken truths.”

“Soooo… what I’m hearing is we have an excuse for this to happen again,” you flirt as you head for the house.

You feel his eyes lingering on you before he springs into action, quickly catching up and opening the door for you. “Liked it that much, huh?” He teases. “Already ready for more?”

Ignoring the blush you feel spreading through you, you continue towards the kitchen. “I’m just saying, you already insisted I sleep over if the rain started, which it has,” you reason. You set the dishes down and spin around to face him. “And there are worse ways to spend our time.”

He nods, giving exaggerated consideration to your points as he inches closer to you. “Well… who are we to fight against nature?” He smirks, lifting you up onto the kitchen counter.

---------------------------------------------

Thank you for reading! I'm no longer in the habit of using a taglist so more than ever, these fics live and die by reblogs! If you enjoyed please consider sharing so it can circulate and be seen by other readers!

[athena-writes-i-guess]

Pairing: Eddie Munson x sibling!reader

Summary: Your Eddie’s younger sibling and Eddie tries to comfort you after a tough day at school

A/N: Hello! This fic was requested by the lovely @kaitykat20 ! I loved writing this, it was pretty special for me as I have a similar relationship with my big brother. He and I always have heart to heart convos in the car every week and he’s helped me through more problems than I can count. I hope you all are ready for some big brother Eddie!

“Hey Weirdo!” Eddie called out as you hurried up to your big brother’s van, a bright smile on his face once he saw you. You shot him a glare as you brushed past him as you made your way to his passenger side door and yanked it open, ignoring the, “Hey!” he called out as you slammed and locked the door behind you.

Eddie ran to the other side of the car and jumped into the drivers side seat, looking at you as he shut the door. “What’s gotten into you Weirdo?” He asked, concern clear in his voice. He didn’t really need to ask, he’s seen how the other kids in your year here at Hawkins High could treat you, but you asked him not to get involved and he wanted to respect your boundaries. Even if it upset him to see you so hurt.

“Stop calling me that Eddie. Let’s just go home.” You snapped, turning away from him completely to look out the window. You ignored the sad sigh your brother let out as he started the ignition. The old van thundered to life and began rumbling comfortingly around you as you rested your head against the cold glass and squeezed your eyes shut.

You were Eddie’s younger sibling, a product of your father’s second marriage after leaving Eddie’s mom many years ago. You were raised together as best as your parents could while being in separate houses, but you started spending everyday together once you both wound up at your Uncle Wayne's house after issues with your parents became too unstable for you both.

You loved your brother and your Uncle, but just being born into this family immediately put a target on your back. Most days you could tell all the kids at school to fuck off, it’s not like any of it was in your control after all. But some days, much like today, you couldn’t handle it. Couldn’t handle the fact that the other kids made fun of you both for having different moms, how you couldn’t afford school lunches or new clothes, how you lived in a trailer park. Everything out of your control, yet somehow your fault.

The ride home was quiet- well, besides the music your brother was always blaring- as Eddie didn’t know what to say or do. He wanted to help, say something encouraging or comforting. But what could he say that he hasn’t told you multiple times over the years? The bullying never stopped, Eddie had just grown a thicker skin over the years. So who was he to tell you it’ll get better when you can clearly see that it wouldn’t? He drummed his fingers on his steering wheel in thought, wracking his brain for anything he could do to at least get you to smile again. Even if it didn’t fix everything.

You threw yourself from the van as soon as Eddie parked in front of the little trailer, barely even waiting for him to come to a complete stop before you jumped out and slammed the door behind you as you practically ran into the trailer. Eddie groaned as he rubbed his face in frustration at himself, he needed to figure out what to do.

The metalhead quickly followed you into the home and sighed as he saw your bedroom door shut, your favorite band blaring through his old stereo -another hand-me-down item that you had to deal with while everyone else got something new- as you drowned out the world.

“What’s going on with them?” Wayne asked from his spot on the small couch as he shoved his shoes on to get ready for work.

“They wouldn’t tell me, but I think the other kids were being mean again.” Eddie replied dejectedly as he plopped on the couch next to his uncle.

“Ah, right.” Wayne sighed. He tried his best and knew you loved and appreciated him, but it was hard for him to know that he couldn’t improve your situation as much as he wanted, for both you and Eddie. “Well, maybe try talkin’ to them later. Give ‘em some cool off time and maybe you can go on one of your drives while I’m out. You know how that usually helps at least a little.” He suggested with a little knowing look. “There’s leftovers, but here’s a little McDonalds money. Get them some fries.” He said, pulling a small wad of cash out of his pocket and handing it to the boy. Eddie knew this was most definitely his uncle's money for lunch, but he also knew that Wayne wouldn’t take it back if Eddie tried to refuse so he just nodded.

Wayne got up with a little groan and Eddie hid a wince, working so many hours a week at his age was tough on his body. It wasn’t helped by the fact that even though he moved you all into a 2 bedroom trailer as soon as he could, he wanted you both to have your own spaces and chose to sleep on a small fold up bed in the living room every day. Eddie hoped that he knew how much both of you appreciated everything he did for you. “Thanks Uncle Wayne.” Eddie said with a small, sad, smile.

“No need to thank me, Eddie, you know that.” The man mumbled as he threw on his coat and grabbed his keys.

“Stay safe. Come back home.” Eddie said simply, it was the closest thing the two men could say to saying ‘I love you’.

“Stay safe. Come back home.” Wayne nodded back, shooting your door one final concerned look before he walked out of the trailer.

~

It was hours later and you still hadn’t come out of your room and you were starting to get hungry. You were still upset, but calmer now, and you were deciding if you should go out and finally talk with Eddie and get some food. As if on cue, there was a knock on your door.

“Hey, weird- Little M?” Eddie called out over your music, correcting himself after you asked him to stop calling you his normal nickname for you, choosing his back up from when you were young kids. A small ghost of a smile appeared on your face at his effort, he was always trying to be a good brother. “Listen, Wayne gave us some money, wanna go get fries?” He asked, still outside as he waited for your response.

Your stomach grumbled at the idea of nice, hot, crispy fries and you sighed. You knew that this wasn’t just a ride to get fries. Every time one of you had a bad day you’d get in the van to drive around and talk it out. Whether it was from a fight between you two, or issues at school, the van was your safe place to work through it and Eddie knew that. You chewed on your lip anxiously for a moment as you decided whether you were ready and sighed lightly as you got up and turned off the stereo. “I’ll be out in a minute Eddie.” You replied as you started putting on your shoes.

“I’ll meet you in the van.” He said, you could hear the relief in his voice and felt a pang of guilt. You hated worrying your family, knowing that it wasn’t their fault that you were going through this, you were all struggling in some way. You just let it get to you a little more than they seemed to.

You shrugged on your jacket as you walked out of the trailer, spying the small smile Eddie shot you as you bounded up to the van. “Ready?” He asked as you got situated in your seat, only pulling out of his parking spot once you sent him a little nod.

The town flew by you as Eddie sped through the sleepy streets, the mixtape he had made just for you blaring through the speakers as he drove the familiar path to the restaurant. He let you sit in silence together on the way there and as he pulled through the drive-thru and ordered your food, only finally deciding to talk as he drove out onto the street again, turning down a back road to take the long way back to the trailer park.

“What happened, Little M?” He asked gently after he lowered the music so you could talk.

You chewed the fries in your mouth slowly as you thought of what to say, “Tyler was making fun of me at lunch, talked about dad and how he’s in jail and called me trailer park trash again. Everyone laughed and piled on.” You sighed out, not noticing the way your brother’s hands tightened briefly around the steering wheel. “I know you’re gonna tell me to just ignore them, but it’s hard Eddie.” You said, Eddie’s heart clenched at how sad you sounded.

“I know it is. I know how hard it is, I promise.” He said seriously, shooting you a quick knowing look before turning back to the street with a sigh. “I’m sorry if I ever-” He paused, briefly chewing on his lip as he thought of the right words to say. “I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you shouldn’t be upset about it, or that you have to just ignore it. You don’t. Fuck, I don’t even ignore it every time. I just try to hide it from you.” He admitted with a little shake of his head. “I just hoped that maybe you’d believe that it gets easier to ignore and maybe it would be. I should have just been there for you more.”

You stared at your big brother for a long moment as you took in his words, watching as he mumbled the words to the song playing softly through the speakers as he waited for you to respond. “You have been there for me Eds, you and Uncle Wayne have been here for me more than anyone else ever has. I think it’d be much harder if I was still with my mom.” You said quietly, shoving some fries into your mouth quickly. “I did take a page out of your book today though.” You said with a small smile.

“Oh?” Eddie asked with a raised eyebrow, your smile mirrored on his face as he stole some fries out of your bag, “What’d you do this time mini me?” He teased lightly.

“Before the rest of the kids joined in, I flipped him off after he talked about dad and said that I couldn’t wait for his dad to go to jail too from selling all those shitty used cars. The whole town knows they’re full of stolen car parts. He did not like that.” You chuckled out, beaming when Eddie busted up laughing.

“Oh I’m sure he didn’t. Did he make that pinched up face and get all red again?” He asked as he took a screeching sharp turn, happy to hear your excited laughter as he did.

“Yeah, he looked like a tomato!” You laughed out as you held onto the door handle as the van swung.

Eddie sped up on a deserted piece of road, driving like a maniac as he was fueled by your giggles, the two of you screaming the lyrics to the Black Sabbath song blaring through the speakers. The van was both of your safe place for stuff like this. You remember when Eddie got the van, you were 13 and he was 16, and as soon as he came back to the trailer with it he told you to hop in and took you for a joyride around Hawkins. There had been countless rides around the state, camping in the van by the lake, rides to theme parks when you had a little extra money. Every issue you had in the last 4 years had been solved in this van.

“I know you know,” Eddie started as he slowed down to be only minorly speeding as the trailer park came into view. “But I’ll always be here for you Little M. No matter what.” He promised, shooting you a gentle smile.

“I know that Eddie. Thank you. I know you sometimes don’t feel like it, but you’re the best brother I could ask for.” You said, returning his smile as he parked in front of the trailer. “And you can go back to calling me Weirdo. I like it.”

Eddie beamed at you, relieved that you were finally feeling better and touched by your words. “Okay Weirdo, thank you. Let’s go watch that movie we rented yesterday again okay?” He asked before pulling you into a quick hug.

“Sounds good Eds.” You chuckled as you were crushed in your brother’s arms.

Taglist: @srapalestina @yvonneeeee @aroseinvelaris @anaisweird @mrslovesmayahawke @harrys-tittie @becca-alexa @catacina

[i-am-church-the-cat]

Oh there’s a comment on my werewolf!Alex/vampire!George post

Oh that’s nice, I’m glad other people can see it and it’s not just me being weird. Actually, I-

Wait a second.

What’s this?

Oh @twinkodium. Oh poor unsuspecting soul that has somehow stumbled upon my blog. If only you knew the avalanche you have unknowingly brought upon yourself.

For you, twinkodium, and those of you who have only started following my blog recently, hello. I’m Church, a genderfluid autistic person, whose special interest is wolves with a specific emphasis on werewolves in media. And today I’m here to tell you why Alex Albon could totally theoretically be a werewolf.

DISCLAIMER: I know a lot about wolves and werewolves so my knowledge of Alex Albon is minuscule in comparison. I am more than happy to accept criticisms on the "Could Alex Albon be a werewolf?" debate. However, if you wish to disagree with my knowledge of lycanthropy, you will have to fight me with your own bare hands in the Florida Everglades. Hugs and kisses <3

That being said, let's get into it.

First of all, anyone can be a werewolf. That’s kind of the whole thing. You never know who around you could have a different side, a side they can’t control and might be totally different from the side they show you. But, that’s not what this is about, so let’s get into the actual details, shall we?

1. Lycanthropy has often and continuously been used as a metaphor for transformation.

The reason why I and many other transgender or gender non-conforming people relate to the story of becoming a werewolf, is because there is a fundamental motif of change. Your body changes, your mind changes, even how people perceive you changes. And from this change comes an increased level of awareness of yourself and your place in the world.

For example, it is a common trope in werewolf media that being turned into a werewolf heightens your “natural instincts” and the personality traits that you already showed as a human. A lot of feelings or ideas that were not as prominent in your human form suddenly takes a new presentation that is unavoidable and must be acknowledged (similar to how a lot of the times when people transition, they act in different or more pronounced ways because they now “feel more like themselves”).

Now, how does this apply to our dear friend and case study, Alex Albon? Well, I present you with two occasions in Alex’s public life where a large transformation took place:

A) his transition from F2/Toro Rosso to F1/Red Bull. Alex was a standout driver in Formula 2 and in his rookie season, this is of course why he got promoted. However, the shift from a high-performing car (when he started in Red Bull) suddenly brought to light a lot of small intricacies in Alex’s driving, some good and some bad (much like how transforming from one species to a more powerful one brings out a lot of traits that you could hide/did not seem as large before).

B) The second transformation is Alex’s change from Red Bull to Williams. The thing about lycanthropy is that even in “human” form, you still retain a lot of lupine traits. And taking that as a metaphor for Alex’s driving, you can see how Alex’s progression in Red Bull and his adaptation to high performing cars makes him out-drive the current Williams car.

HOWEVER. I don’t actually think Alex’s driving career has as much to do with why he’d be a werewolf as the simple fact that: Alex himself loves the act of transformation. All F1 drivers have some level of appreciation for change to do what they do, but not only does Alex transform himself to specific situations, he also just transforms himself for fun (re: dying his hair on a monthly basis).

Okay now on to criteria number 2:

2. Wolves are intrinsically shaped within a pack structure and need constant connection with their species to prosper. In that same vein, there is often a lone wolf vibe to werewolves in media because they are expelled from both natural human and wolf societies as a stage between the two.

Not only does Alex Albon have a big ass family (I say big but it is of course relative, but wolves do live in family structures made up of 5-9 members) but he has an entire zoo of animals (I am actually not even sure how many but at least in the double digits). This man screams pack structure. And this is not only shown in his actual family life, but also in his interactions with his teammates and friends on the grid. Alex Albon is a social animal and that's what wolves are.

Now, for the "lone wolf" aspect, of course Alex is in a very self-centered sport. But, drawing from my own experiences, being of mixed race can also feel very lonely. You're not 100% one or the other because there are always going to be aspects of yourself that depend on the fact that you're both. Alex Albon is both British and Thai and has said himself that it can be difficult (for example: "when I'm doing well I'm British and when I'm doing poorly I'm not British").

A large part of the overarching lycanthropic story is trying to find connection when you've constantly been isolated. For Alex, I see this most in the change from Red Bull to Williams. Red Bull is a lone wolf structure and Williams is a pack structure and we all know which one Alex has thrived more in.

Moving on to criteria number 3:

3. Werewolves in media have their senses dialed up to 11 and they often emote more and act in certain ways that feel more instinctual.

I don't feel like I have to say much about this. Alex Albon is the king of emoting. It's impossible for him to hide his emotions, when he's annoyed he looks annoyed, when he's happy he looks happy. And often this shows itself in strong ways (the iconic meme of him yelling "George").

HOWEVER! (I've been saying however a lot but still, however) a big big big thing in the overarching werewolf story is control. You have to have control to be palatable, to not outcast yourself or give yourself away. That's why I think even though Alex doesn't blow up like Yuki, or have his emotions literally bursting out of his body like Daniel, he's still a really good representation of how lycanthropy can (hypothetically) make you present your emotions in a very large way.

Bonus Criteria: Looks

I have focused on personality and storyline for the most part of this post and for a reason. However it must be said:

Does this man not look like a werewolf?? I mean, honestly, idk what y'all think a werewolf looks like, but this is it. The wider, flatter nose, the shaggy hair, the eyebrows. Even his chin man, idk how to describe it.

Anyway, this is where I rest my case. If this gets any attention, I might attempt to do a post on why I think vampire!George is totally realistic, but I am much more a werewolf enthusiast than a vampire enthusiast so we'll see. If you got to the end, congratulations, you deserve a cookie.

Werewolf!Alex Albon forever.

[cinnamonspicewritingroom]

More Than Diamonds

Pairing: Prince Friedrich x Princess! Reader Description: Britain has gained themselves a new royalty nearing the debutante ball of 1813. Princess Amelia of Siam was sent as the new Ambassador of Siam. In Britain Princess Amelia was able to find her family, but will that be all? Tags: Slow burn, Coming of age, Time-Travel, Back to the past, Friends to Lovers, Royalties, Oblivious!FLxObvious!ML, Jealous! Friedrich, Slightly Possessive! Friedrich, Black cat gf, Golden retriever bf Timeline: S1&S2

Chapter 7: What Season?

It has been approximately 2 months since Amelia knew the Bridgertons. They have insisted that they spend lots of time together. From being invited to promenades, which Amelia has never done before and truthfully it felt weird for her to not read her documents, be in meetings or just be in her office. Taking a stroll and relaxing is not her thing as she found herself growing restless. 

With Lynn and Violet working together, Amelia has to push deadlines backwards as apparently she is moving way too fast. The staff were unable to rest properly making them unproductive in the workplace. 

“You look uncomfortable. Are you alright?” Benedict whispered as she was walking with Eloise. Amelia was explaining to her the concept of feminism and why it does not only benefit women. 

“Really Amelia? Are you tired?” Eloise glanced at her cousin who is younger by several months. “Not tired per se. Merely concerned.” Amelia sighed, crossing her arms. Her eyes squinted from the sunlight. “Something happened in the embassy?” Amelia shook her head at Benedict’s question. 

“Lynn delegates Tian to attend the meeting in my place because we oversee the project together, but somehow the meeting runs longer. I should have received a report by now.” Benedict sighed. These past 2 months one thing all Bridgertons realised is that Amelia is not only a slave driver to her staff and herself, but also has a terrible case of being a workaholic. 

Nowadays none of them are surprised if they found her sleeping anywhere. Be it on the floor after playing marbles with Hyacinth and Gregory, in the corner of the room with a book on her lap or documents, on the sofa or once even in the garden. 

“Amelia. Today is supposed to be your day off and tomorrow is the weekend! Come on, lighten up.” Benedict looped her arm through his. The energy he has made Amelia chuckled when she saw 2 men in Royal Guard uniform. Violet who was with Daphne did not realise they were approaching. 

“Pardon me, Dowager Viscountess Bridgerton.” Their presence alarmed Anthony as he quickly pulled his mother and Daphne behind him. Colin and Benedict quickly came to back him up. 

“Hello, gents. What is going on here?” Both guards bowed their heads at Anthony. “Viscount Bridgerton, we are here to escort Lady Amelia.” Then they turned to Amelia and bowed. “Your grace, your presence is needed by His Royal Highness, Prince Regent George IV in the Palace of Westminster.” Amelia nodded. “How many carriages are available? By Siamese security protocols I am to bring my guards at all times.” The guards nodded. “We were briefed on your security protocols. We brought 3 carriages. 1 for you and your Lord and Lady in waiting, 2 for the Siamese Royal Guards.” Amelia nodded and turned to her Aunt and cousins. 

“Well, I will be on my way. I will see you again My dear aunt and dearest cousins.” With that Amelia followed the British Royal Guards. She could hear the whispers of the people in Vauxhall Gardens. Amelia rolled her eyes as she kept walking. She knows the men in Britain degrade her standings in politics for being a woman and more so as someone who is not British. The women's image of her is not that good either for taking such a manly job. 

“Bunch of racist sexist fools.” She muttered as she got on the carriage followed by Lynn and Hugo. 

***

Amelia’s meeting with the Prince Regent went on for approximately 3 hours and ended an hour before dinner time. “Princess Amelia, as it is only an hour away from dinner time, you are welcome to join today’s dinner if you like.” Amelia paused gathering her documents and looked at George. 

“Is it mandatory?” “No,” George shook his head. “Am I allowed to refuse?” He smiled slightly. He likes Amelia, she won’t pretend if she doesn’t have to. “You can.” Amelia nodded. “Then I apologise in advance, I will not be joining the dinner as I am needed for the Russian-Siam-British meeting with Prince Edward at 8 pm in Buckingham Palace.” George blinked, “Then why don’t we have dinner there?” He bit his lips to prevent a laugh from slipping out as Amelia sent him annoyed looks. He knows unless it’s necessary Amelia will not be socialising with anyone, unless somehow the Bridgertons.

“I apologised, before the meeting I would like to try a restaurant that has been on my wish list for a while. Apologies in advance, I cannot extend my invitation as this has been my plan with Lynn and Hugo.” While George has no romantic intentions with the young girl, he knows a beautiful face when he sees one, plus he does like hanging out with her. She is witty and has a good sense of humour without the flirtiness many women throw at him. 

“How about calling the chef to the Palace instead? If it is that good I would like to try it as well.” He knows she doesn’t want him to come, he just wants to tease her a bit. He wanted to laugh as soon as her lips turned into a frown and tore a piece of paper to write something down.

“This is the name of the restaurant. Try it next time with one of your mistresses, do not bother my bonding time with my friends.” She huffed before marching to the door, but before she went out, she turned around and did a quick curtsy to be polite. “I will excuse myself now.” It is a shame none of his younger sisters are cute, no wonder the heir apparent of Siam doted on her. Adorable, smart and polite. If he is her older brother it would be hard for her to get married. 

***

With the lack of entertainment around her, the Queen does enjoy the Siamese Princess presence. Her wit and honesty are truly one to adore. Unfortunately she is extremely busy that they usually only meet up once a week for tea time, so when she heard Princess Amelia is meeting up with her son, Edward for a meeting, she quickly summoned the Princess for dinner. However, her eldest son, George interrupted the command saying she has dinner plans with her Lord and Lady-in-waiting. 

“So, you are saying she will reject me for her Lord and Lady-in-waiting?” Queen Charlotte’s eyebrow twitched. “Of course she will not, but she will not be happy either with the interruption. She said the trip was something the 3 of them anticipated.” George reasoned out. 

“Alright then.” Queen Charlotte sighed and leaned back on her chair. Usually she would not care if she interrupts someone’s schedule, but the British are trying to be an allied nation with Siam, so being in their bad book is a no-no. 

“Tell Edward to ask if she is available for tea in the afternoon tomorrow.” George nodded before he exited the room. 

***

“Alright, thank you. I will make sure to bring the prototype to our next meeting.” The Russian representative, a Duke from Imperial Russia, beamed a smile at Amelia, satisfied with the result of their meeting. Edward watched as Amelia smiled back at the representative, making him blush.

“Princess Amelia, do you-” “Princess Amelia, my mother was wondering if you will join her for tea time tomorrow afternoon” Edward quickly interrupted when the duke was about to reach out for her hand. The volume of his voice did make Amelia jump a bit. 

“Uh- I am free tomorrow from 2 pm to 4.30 pm after my meeting with the Prince Regent.” Which she was about to use for tea time with Violet and her female cousins, but I guess that is not happening. 

“Great, keep it open. Mother would like to have tea with you. Would you write it down please, Lady Lynn.” Edward grinned at Lynn who nodded with an impassive face. 3 months since he met her and never have he seen her smile or laugh. 

Lynn saw what happened and while she doesn’t condone much of the many British Princes behaviour, so far she liked Prince George, Prince Edward and Prince William. They do not seem to be attracted romantically with the Princess, rather as a younger sister. They teased her, but protected her virtue from other lecherous men. A rather welcomed double standard from her part. 

“Milady, we better go soon.” Lynn reminded the Princess who nodded. 

“Alright, then I will be going first. See you at our next meeting.” The Princess curtsy before they head out the door. 

***

Edward was just walking to his room when he saw his mother, staring at their family portrait. Truthfully, after his first meeting with Amelia, the debate happening between her and his brother, Frederick, got him thinking about his mother. She is so strong, taking care of 13 children, running the country and taking care of a mad husband, whom she still loves dearly. 

Growing up watching his parents love, maybe that was what he wanted. Marriage of passion and love. His parents may not marry because of love, but after they got to know each other, it was a love match and they continued their marriage out of love. However, with his father being ill, his mother is now withering away. She still looked regal, but older and often sad. Amelia is probably right, her children need to appreciate her more.

“Mother,” Edward walked towards his mother with a smile. She turned to face him, a slight smile on her face. She looked beautiful despite her age. “Edward. Did you just finish the meeting?” Edward nodded. “Yes, in fact I did. I also did not forget to ask Princess Amelia about tomorrow afternoon.” Hearing Amelia’s name got his mother’s smile in full bloom. 

“Really? Did she agree to come?” Edward smiled at his mother and nodded. “She did. Do you not like her a tad bit too much?” Queen Charlotte smiled at his question. “Well, she is witty, honest and intelligent. She even appreciated me more than many of my children, so you cannot blame me for taking a liking to her.” She looked at Edward and cooed. “If only you all were younger, I would have made you marry her.” Edward looked scandalised. “Mother- She may be beautiful, but I do not see her that way!” He hissed at his mother who laughed. 

“Marriage is a duty, my dear. That was how I got married.” She casted her eyes downwards, looking sad before she looked at him. “Well, I will return to my chamber now. Good night, my dear.” Edward nodded at his mother, sighing. “Good night mother.” He may not be able to give his mother marriage, but maybe he should consider begging Amelia to attend more tea time with his mother if it makes her happy. With that in mind, he continued walking to his chamber.

***

Amelia did in fact come to the afternoon tea with the Queen. She was donned in what a 21st century woman would describe as smart casual. Amelia wore an all pink cropped blazer, cut an inch above the waist with a mandarin collar and 3 buttons in rows. Underneath, she wore a white sleeveless shirt with a mandarin collar. For the bottom, she wore a matching pink midi-skirt that went all the way to the floor, covering her ankle. For shoes she wore nude coloured strappy heels.

Her hair was up in a bun with a strand of fringe framing the side of her face. With a mandarin collar, Amelia did not bother to wear a necklace, instead opting for long diamond earrings. She also kept her makeup simple, almost looking bare-faced. Women here may not carry purses, but having lived as Davika in the 21st century got her to realise a purse is a necessity. She carries a simple white alligator skin purse to keep her mini hand cream, mini rose water spray, perfume balm, mirror, tinted lip balm, a home-made pepper spray and a hidden-knife dagger.  

“Princess Amelia, I am rather interested in your attire today. It is extremely different from what the ladies your age preferred.” Lady Danbury commented. “Is this a fashion statement or merely the fashion in Siam?” Amelia glanced at the old lady as she sipped her tea. She soundlessly placed her cup on the saucer before voicing her answer. 

“Thank you for taking an interest in my attire Lady Danbury, despite my choice I hope you actually like it.” Amelia gave her a smile while delivering her sweet introduction. “I do realise that what I wore is different from what the ladies my age wore, but then again none of them actually does what I do.” Amelia shrugged her shoulders. 

“My gender alone has caused controversy among the men as a woman in politics and diplomacy, I could not imagine what chaos would ensue if I show up wearing such dresses.” Amelia blinked as she settled her tea on the table. 

“Therefore, you could say my clothing is a fashion statement.” Amelia concluded.

“I think it looks beautiful my dear. To think those men have the confidence to judge how women dress while looking like that.” The Queen scoffed. Amelia smiled at the Queen’s words. 

“Thank you, Your Majesty.” Queen Charlotte replied with a smile of her own. 

“Well, the men always think they have the liberty to do whatever they want.” Lady Danbury grumbled as Amelia leaned and grabbed her hand. 

“I think you look absolutely fetching, Milady.” Lady Danbury chuckled as she patted the hand on hers. 

“Thank you, your Royal Highness.” Amelia pouted at the old lady. 

“Please, just Amelia would do. That sounds extremely formal.” This got a laugh from the Queen and Lady Danbury.

***

From a distance, Hugo and Lynn were staring at their Princess being cute towards the old ladies. 

“Do you think anyone will try to adopt her or ask her to marry their children?” Hugo leaned down and asked Lynn who was focusing on the Princess. 

“I bet her Majesty, the Queen actually wanted her to marry one of the Princes.” Hugo’s lips jutted forward as he stared at the Princess with a raised eyebrow.

“I do not get how she does it.” Lynn glanced up at him. 

“What? Being friendly with old people? Her Royal Highness always has a soft spot for old people, no?” Hugo hummed at Lynn’s words. 

“I mean, that was how she got close to her grandparents.” Different from Lynn who has been Amelia’s playmates before a Lady-in-Waiting, Hugo only became Amelia’s Lord-in-Waiting when she turned 12, therefore he did not know the details of Amelia’s life.

“Is that how she got her title changed to Somdet Chao Fa?” Lynn gave him a once over look from top to bottom. 

“What are you talking about? The Princess did not ask the Dowager Queen of Siam or the late King to elevate her and Prince Vernon’s title.” Lynn looked downright disappointed by his accusation of their master. 

“It was given by King Rama II for the Prince and Princess contribution to solidify a diplomatic relation with the Joseon Empire.” Hugo let out a ‘wow’ as he continued to stare at their Princess. 

“Hugo. I’m only going to say this once. If you betray the Princess in any way, shape or form, I will not hesitate to kill you.” Hugo visibly gulped at the threat. He may be a soldier and former colonel of the Royal Army, as the granddaughter of a warrior monk, Lynn was trained in battle and killing. 

“I’ll keep that in mind, but you must know that my loyalty lies with the Princess.” He sighed as Lynn side-eyed him. 

“I hope ‘Princess’ does not mean the Royal Family because that is an extremely big extension.” Hugo did not answer and just plastered a tight smile on his face.

***

Amelia was just giving the Queen and Lady Danbury explanations on things she carried in her purse when Queen Charlotte mentioned about the debutante season. 

“Princess Amelia, have you found yourself a seamstress for the season?” Amelia blinked, not knowing what this season was about. 

“Season? Like… Spring?” This got Lady Danbury and the Queen laughing, making Amelia look confused. 

“I guess not spring.” Lady Danbury smiled at her cute response. 

“Oh my, did you really not know about the season?” Amelia shook her head. 

“It is the debutante season, usually girls around 16-18 years old will be introduced to the society and they will try to find themselves a match to marry.” Amelia’s mind went to Daphne, so that was what she fussed about. 

“Aah… No…” The Queen smiled and clapped her hands. 

“Well, you are a Princess from Siam, we cannot let your dress be sewn by just any seamstress. You will be using the Royal Family’s seamstress.” Amelia looked uncomfortable. 

“Do I have to?” The Queen looked confused at her question. 

“You do not want to use the seamstress?” Amelia shook her head. 

“Be introduced, I mean… After all, I am from Siam and not from Great Britain, so I do not see why I need to.” The Queen and Lady Danbury looked at each other from the corner of their eyes. They were hoping the Siamese Princess to have a love match with someone from British nobility to solidify their relationship with Siam. 

“While that is true, introducing you to the British nobility will further Britain and Siam’s relationship, no? You may even be able to create connections with them” “...Or love” Lady Danbury whispered discreetly as The Queen tried to soften the approach. 

“Ah… How about this year I… See how it works first and next year I will decide if I want to be a debutante, it is 16 to 18 years old right? I have no preparation or knowledge about this season after all.” Amelia offered to not offend the Queen of Great Britain. This is, after all their culture and tradition, plus a quote she remembered from her time as Davika was, ‘When you are in Rome, do as the Romans do’ and right now, she is in Britain. In any way possible, Amelia needs to find a way not to create an enemy out of the Queen.

“Alright, that is acceptable.” The Queen hummed, taking a sip from her cup. 

“Girls who already prepared their whole life for their debut have made mistakes. It would be unthinkable to make you prepare in such a short time.” Lady Danbury quipped and the Queen nodded as her face turned sour, remembering the Featherington girls.

“I will make sure to have a carriage ready for that day.” Queen Charlotte stated and Amelia knows she cannot reject it. 

“Thank you for your generosity, your Majesty.” She sweetly smiled at Queen Charlotte who looked satisfied. 

“I usually hold the first ball of the season and I would appreciate it if you would make an attendance, Princess Amelia.” Amelia liked Lady Danbury, so she gave her the same sweet smile and nodded. 

“I will make sure to keep my schedule empty to attend it. Thank you, Lady Danbury.” The old lady chuckled while nodding, looking extremely satisfied. Amelia mentally noted to ask her aunt and cousins about what this season is about.

***

Different from the usual setting, Amelia was rather very busy, therefore instead of going to the Bridgerton house, this time Daphne, Eloise, Benedict and Colin are visiting the Siamese to their house. Anthony was away and Violet was taking care of Hyacinth who caught a fever at home. Gregory was also with her. 

“This is really good!” Colin claimed as he ate another serving of mango sticky rice. They are sitting in the semi-outdoor dining room that is reserved for close friends and family only. A place where Amelia, Hugo and Lynn could do whatever they want, like eating while working. 

“Aww, why does it taste so good,” Daphne whined “I cannot gain weight before my debut presentation.” She was still eyeing the cassava with coconut milk. A pout was apparent on her face, which only deepened as Benedict and Colin teased her by eating a spoonful each. 

“What is this debut presentation?” Lynn asked, but her eyes did not look at the British as she was busy scooping another serving or spicy green curry. 

“A means to showcase women as if they are prized calf to the society to flaunt themselves in hope of attracting a suitable suitor and where men will create their highest bidding in search for a wife-” “Stop spreading nonsense, Eloise.” Daphne cut off to reprimand her younger sister.

“I only spoke of the truth, sister. Throughout the season, women pit against each other to secure what they think is the best suitor and the men will try their hardest to woo women to take them as a wife.” Daphne frowned at Eloise’s words as the Siamese cringed, Hugo and Lynn turned to Amelia. 

“Fortunately you rejected the Queen and Lady Danbury’s suggestion.” Lynn said as she chewed the chicken in her spicy green curry. This got the British perked up.

“Princess, do not join. We are busy enough as it is.” Their attention was tossed to Hugo.

“That is insanity. Imagine the headache. I’m glad I rejected the offer despite not knowing what it is.” Before it was tossed to Amelia who was still busy with her documents. 

“Wait- Mel- What is this about?” Amelia’s eyes widened as Eloise slid in next to her and blocked her view of her documents with her hand. 

“It was earlier, the Queen offered me to use her seamstress to create a gown for the debut presentation- was it? But I rejected her offer.” Amelia sighed as she swatted Eloise’s arm. Amelia never thought her answer would bring so much chaos.

“What? Why did you reject her offer?” Daphne and Benedict looked at her as if she had grown another head. 

“There is no use or benefit for me to debut aside from creating connections, which I could do without debuting. I am not British nor am I looking for a suitor.” Amelia shrugged her shoulders. While her reason made sense, it was still a waste. A chance to receive a gown made by the Queen’s seamstress. 

“You could have still accepted it… A gown made by the Queen’s seamstress.” Daphne’s eyes twinkled at the thought. 

“I may not be the Queen, but I am still the Princess of Siam. My seamstresses are top quality if you want your debutante dress made by them. They are up to date with fashion and you can consult with them on what you like.” Daphne gasped at the offer and stood up from her chair to hug Amelia tightly, which choked her slightly. 

“Would you really do that? Oh god, thank you so much Mel!” Amelia tapped Daphne on her forearms as her throat was being squashed. “Daphne- Come on, let go. Amelia can’t breathe.” Colin laughed as he pried Daphne from Amelia. With that the rest of the night was spent bonding between cousins and friends.

Words: 3858

More Than Diamond's Master List

IMPORTANT NOTES A/N: Hello, how are you guys? I hope you are well. Regarding this story that is following Julia Quinn's hit series, Bridgerton, I would start by saying I read the book first before I watch the Netflix series, thus I apologize if there are some differences with the Netflix version, but I will try to make it as similar as possible. I would also ask the readers to be kind when criticizing this story as this is my first time to actually publishing my work in the open. For the story, as you can see there is a time-travel tag. Our reader was sent back to the past with all the knowledge from the future. If you are also confused with Davika's education, I actually based her using Spencer Reid, a character from Criminal Minds. I also made Friedrich to be a year younger than Benedict when in actuality, he was born in 1794, 2 years younger than Daphne. If you are not interested or felt like those 2 themes ruined a historical romance story, then please do not leave any bad comments as you can just stop reading this story. Thank You Very Much! Much Love, Cinnamon Meilleure's Writing Room

[biggerbetterbat]

WITH YOU [28] DEAL

Daryl Dixon x OC!Charlie Reed

Summary: Rick has to solve a problem that interrupts their peace.

Warnings: language, death

Song: ?????

A/N: Hello. Now chapters will be published on Wednesdays. See you soon, and enjoy!

Five, unknown men were standing and looking at them in horror, for which they couldn't really blame them. They stormed into a locked room and cut a man's leg off, like some freaks.

"Who the hell are you?" asked a man with tattoos and a prison uniform taken off his shoulder, so it was lower on his hips.

"Who the hell are you?" Daryl asked.

"He's bleeding out!" screamed Rick, trying to bring focus back on important matters. "We gotta go back. Come around here. Put pressure on the knee. Hard! Push, push!"

Charlie moved her eyes from her friends back to the prisoners.

"Why don't you come on out of there?" said Daryl and T-Dog put a metallic bar in between the handles, so they could have free hands just in case they were needed. "Slow and steady."

"What happened to him?" asked the man with long hair.

"He got bit," Charlie said.

"Bit?" he asked and pulled out his gun from behind his pants.

Charlie took out her gun and pointed at the man, T-Dog following her moves. "Easy now."

"Nobody needs to get hurt," Daryl said.

"You have medical supplies?" Glenn asked, passing the prisoners. He ignored completely the thing that someone was pointing a gun at him, he entered some room, trying to find whatever he needed.

"Woah, where do you think you're going? Who the hell are you people anyway?" asked the man holding a gun, which didn't really bother Glenn.

"Don't look like no rescue team." said another one.

Charlie looked at the five men with eyes that were radiating something like compassion. She was them once, waiting to be rescued for something that could have been three weeks or months. One of many things that she had learned during the end of the world was not waiting for a rescue, there was nobody able to save you. That's why she decided to be the one breaking their bubble."If a rescue team is what you're waiting for, don't."

"Come on, we gotta go," said Rick, somehow ignoring the presence of the prisoners.

"Holy Jesus." whispered one of them.

"Are you crazy?" the other said. "Don't open that!"

"We got this," Charlie said and moved away from the prisoners, ready to kill the Walkers.

Naively she thought that the men they met somewhere in the prison would be just a distant memory once they came back to their block, but she was wrong. "That's far enough," Daryl said to the prisoners, who apparently walked right behind them.

"Cellblock C." the one with tattoos inhaled deeply as if the air around here smelled like home. "Cell 4...That's mine, gringo. Let me in."

"Today's your lucky day, fellas," said Daryl. "You've been pardoned by the state of Georgia. You're free to go."

He wanted them gone right this instant. They couldn't be trusted, they were in prison at the end of the day. Daryl didn't want them around their cellblock and around Charlie, the best for them was not even looking at her.

"What you got going on in there?" asked the prisoner.

"It's none of your concern," Daryl answered.

"Don't be telling me what's my concern."

Charlie clicked her gun, signaling that she was ready to shoot. That would be something new to kill a living and breathing person, but she had a feeling that it was either them or the prisoners.

"Chill, man." said a tall guy. "Dude's leg is messed up. Besides, we're free now. Why are we still in here?"

"The man's got a point." Dixon once again was faster and opened his mouth before Charlie even made up her mind.

"Yeah," nodded another man. "And I have to check on my old lady."

Reed sighed heavily because there was probably no chance that there still was some old lady to check. If she was still where he left her she would probably be ready to eat him alive."A group of civilians breaking into a prison you got no business being in..." interrupted a man with tattoos that was getting on Charlie's nerves more and more. "Got me thinking there ain't no place for us to go."

"Why don't you go find out?" Charlie asked, narrowing her eyes at the guy.

"Why don't you just kneel for me, girl?" he snapped at her immediately. "You like to run your mouth I see."

Daryl all tensed up at the man's words, he was ready to kill him really. He saw that Charlie didn't feel comfortable - how would she be? If she didn't hold a gun, she would probably dig her nails into the inside of her palms, like she used to do. Charlie on the other hand was burning. She was angry and she was holding a gun, so she was in charge now. She wasn't an innocent girl who needed a knight in shining armor, and she knew that pulling that trigger would be easier than one could suppose. "Why don't I just put a bullet in your dick?"

"I would like to see you trying, princess."

"Maybe we'll just be going now." one of the prisoners gulped.

"Hey, we ain't leaving." protested the tatted man.

"You ain't coming in either," Charlie said.

"This is my house, my rules. I go where I damn well please," he argued.

"There ain't nothing for you." she spat.

"Why don't you go back to your own sandbox?" he said. "Maybe I would let you stay princess. We could have fun."

Charlie wanted to throw up at the gaze she felt on her body. The man was rather handsome, but still, he was creeping the shit out of her and making her feel dirty just by imagining what he would do to her if they had met in different conditions. That's why without thinking and without blinking she just fired her gun. A bullet didn't even graze the man but flew extremely close to his crotch.

"Hey!" Rick screamed, making everyone turn their attention towards him. "Everyone relax. There's no need for this."

"How many are in there?"

"Too many for you to handle." Rick lied.

Yeah. Especially, Lori, they wouldn't handle a pregnant lady who would probably give birth to a baby by sneezing any moment soon. Oh, there was also Carl. The man who was probably twice Carl's height would never handle him. And Beth would beat them with the power of love and a song...Charlie had to admit that they were pathetic.

"You guys robbed a bank or something?" the prisoner asked. "Why don't you take him to a hospital?"

They exchanged glances, searching for a person who was going to break it to the man. Charlie felt no remorse for them, so she decided to be the one kicking a puppy. "How long have you been locked in that cafeteria?

"Going on like 10 months."

"A riot broke out." said another man. "Never seen anything like it."

"Attica in speed, man," said Axel. Charlie sent him a skeptical stare. He was acting as if they were friends and they weren't, they were pointing guns at each other.

"Ever heard about dudes going cannibal, dying, coming back to life?" asked the tall man. "Crazy."

"One guard looked out for us, and locked us up in the cafeteria." said prisoner. "Told us to sit tight, threw me this piece, said he'd be right back."

"Yeah, and that was 292 days ago."

"Minus 94 according to my calcula..." Axel opened his mouth.

"Shut up!" the tattooed man snapped.

"We were thinking that the Army or the National Guard should be showing up any day now." added another man.

"There is no Army," Charlie said.

"What do you mean?"

"There's no government, no hospitals, no police. It's all gone." Rick confirmed.

"For real?"

"You see us laughing? What kind of question is that?" Charlie snapped at Axel.

"We're serious," said Rick.

"What about my moms?" asked the tall guy.

"My kids? And my old lady?" gasped another man. He stepped forward in their direction. "Yo, you got a cell phone or something that we can call our families?"

Charlie was looking at them and decided that those men were more pathetic than her group. The group was pathetic, but the prisoners seemed to be even more hopeless. Archer next to her opened his mouth in annoyance."You just don't get it, do you?"

"No phones, no computers. Nothing," she said, and then she looked at the guy with long hair. "Nada."

"As far as we can see, at least half the population has been wiped out." Rick cleared. "Probably more."

"Ain't no way." one of them said, still not believing.

"See for yourself," Charlie said, lowering her gun.

The bright sun hit their faces as they opened the doors to the prison, so the five men could see with their own eyes how the world looked like now. There were still bodies of the Walkers that were killed yesterday as they didn't have time to burn them and clear the courtyard yet.

"Good Lord. They're all dead." observed the man.

"Never thought I'd be so happy to see these fences." said the other one, ignoring the fact that most of their fellow prisoners were dead now.

"You never said..." said the man with long hair. "How the hell did you get in here in the first place?"

"Cut a hole in that fence over there by that guard tower," Charlie said, crossing arms on her chest.

"That easy, huh?"

"Where there's a will, there's a way," said Daryl, driving the man's attention away from Charlie.

"Easy for you to say."

Charlie was looking with disgust as one of the prisoners was poking the dead body as if he wasn't a human before. The man could talk with him before the world collapsed, and now was acting as if it was some kind of dead bug. When he noticed her eyes on him, he asked. "So what is this, like a disease?"

She didn't want to answer him, even though he looked friendly. Charlie was disgusted by them and just wished they were gone already. That's why Rick was the one to answer. "Yeah, and we're all infected."

"What do you mean infected?" Axel asked. "Like AIDS or something?"

"If I was to kill you, shoot an arrow in your chest, you'd come back as one of these things," Daryl explained. "It's gonna happen to all of us."

"Ain't no way these Robin Hood cats are responsible for killing all these freaks. Must be 50 bodies out here." the guy with tattoos whose name was Tomas apparently, murmured under his nose. "Where'd you come from?"

"Atlanta," Rick said.

"Where are you headed?"

"For now, nowhere." the leader answered Tomas's question again.

"I guess you can take that area down there near the water." he pointed at the bridge and small pond that were just behind the fence. "Should be comfortable."

"We're using that field for crops," Grimes said.

"We'll help you move your gear out." ignored his words Tomas.

"That won't be necessary," Rick said. "We took out these Walkers. This prison is ours.

"Slow down, cowboy," he said and furrowed his brows. "You snatched the locks off our doors."

"We'll give you new locks if that's how you want it." Charlie rolled her eyes.

"This is our prison," Tomas said annoyed. "We were here first."

"Locked in a broom closet?" Charlie murmured, for what she earned an angry look.

"We took it, set you free. It's ours." Rick said. "We spilled blood."

"We're moving back into our cellblock." the prisoner still tried to reason.

"You'll have to get your own."

"It's mine," Tomas said. "I've still got personal artifacts in there. That's about as mine as it gets."

"Cell 4 was yours?" Charlie asked. "Then there's nothing that belongs to you. Not anymore."

"Woah," Tomas said, ready to fight.

"Maybe let's try to make this work out so everybody wins."

"I don't see that happening." protested Tomas who seemed to be a leader.

"Neither do I." Charlie nodded.

"I ain't going back in that cafeteria for one more minute."

"There are other cell blocks," said Rick.

"You could leave." Daryl shrugged. "Try your luck out on the road."

"If these three pussies can do all this, the least we can do is take out another cell block," Tomas said.

"With what?"

"Atlanta here will spot us some real weapons," he answered to his friend who seemed surprised by the sudden change. "Won't you, boss?"

"How stocked is that cafeteria?" the ex-sheriff deputy asked. "It must have plenty of food. Five guys lasting almost a year?"

"I'm sure as hell don't look like anybody's been starving." Daryl nodded.

"There's only a little left," they answered.

"We'll take half," Rick said and it wasn't like a question. "In exchange, we'll help clear out a cellblock."

"Didn't you hear him?" asked one of the prisoners. "There's only a little left."

"But you got more food than you got choices." Rick shrugged. "You pay, we'll play. We'll clear out a block for you, then you keep to it."

Charlie knew something was not right. The sudden change in the man's behavior was suspicious. Besides, she didn't trust him at all, he was in prison for a reason. As far as she could remember, they didn't lock people here for being good and decent.

"All right."

"But let's be clear...If we see you out here anywhere near our people, if I so much as even catch a whiff of your scent, I will kill you." Rick warned him.

"Deal."

Waiting was the worst part of life. Even before all of this she absolutely hated waiting, it was making her anxious. It could be just waiting for her friends to come or waiting for a package, she hated that. But now in times when you never knew if your friends were still alive when they left for food, waiting got even worse. What was really shaking her up was the thought that Daryl was gone with some psychos and Hershel was probably dying in a cell.

"Food's here." Charlie's head snapped up as she heard T-Dog's voice.

She stood up and saw how two men were entering their cellblock. After Carl's question, they found out that T was carrying canned beef, corn, and canned cans how he put it. The boy was running after him, wanting to help and Charlie headed after them.

"Is everything all right?" she asked and T looked behind her at Rick.

"I don't trust those guys," he whispered. "I'm not sure we should let them have even a cell around here."

"What?"

"The big guy, Axel, and Oscar they seem fine, but the one with tats?" T furrowed his eyebrows. "I'm not sure, man."

"Where's Daryl? You left him with them?" she whisper-screamed at the man. "I'm going with you."

"Hey, hey, hey." T-Dog touched her shoulders. "First of all, he's a big boy and can handle stuff. Besides, if I came back there with you he would kill me."

"They're dangerous."

"He knows that. He volunteered to go with Rick, he knows the risk," he said. "That's why he didn't want you there."

That's how she ended up waiting some more...Waiting for Daryl and waiting for Hershel to wake up. She couldn't bear the sight of Beth trying to act as if nothing was going on and the sight of Maggie's puffy eyes. But Daryl robbed her of the ability to do something else. If he had let her go with them she wouldn't have to worry about Daryl as he would be close, and her mind would have been occupied. But she was in a cellblock C, leaning her back on a doorframe to Hershel's cell, standing in front of Glenn. He was fiddling with metal chains to the clock Hershel owned and she was looking at the doors, wishing and prying that they would show up in a second. That he would show up.

She noticed that Glenn looked up and focused his haze behind her. Charlie looked in that direction and saw Carl walking towards them with a bag. He could barely walk with how big the thing he carried was. In his other hand, he carried his gun.

"I thought you were organizing the food," she said.

"Even better." he smiled at her and she sighed as she knew that smile. He entered the cell and dropped the bag, showing what was inside. "Check it out."

"Where did you get this?" Carol gasped.

"From the infirmary?" he said. "There wasn't much left, but I cleared it out.

Yet again her feeling was correct. From the moment she heard Keep an eye on Carl, she knew that would be just a burden and sooner or later he would get her in trouble. And of course, he did!

Charlie wasn't sure if she was mad at him for going there all by himself or not taking her. That would be a hundred times better for her head.

"You went by yourself?" Lori asked.

"Yeah," Carl answered proudly.

"Are you crazy?" Lori opened her eyes wider at the answer and then she looked at Charlie. "You were supposed to keep an eye on him."

"I was," Charlie argued. "I turned just for a second, I swear!" she tried to explain herself, but then she realized that Lori wasn't in a place to judge her. "You think it's easy? He's not a baby anymore. Next time just put a chip around his ankle, that would help."

"Don't argue," Carl said. "It's no big deal. I killed two Walkers."

"You did what?!" Charlie gasped.

"You..." Lori looked away from her son. "All right, do you see this? This was with the whole group."

"We needed supplies, so I got them."

"I appreciate that, but..."

"Then got off my back!" he yelled.

"Carl!" Charlie said and placed her hand on his shoulder. "She's your mother. You can't talk to her like that."

"Listen, I think it's great that you wanna help..." but Lori didn't get to finish as Carl just ran out of the cell. Charlie didn't want to hear his mother blaming her for what she should have done, so she just followed the boy's lead.

"That was not cool Carl," she said, standing in the doors to his cell.

"I know. You already told me." he rolled his eyes. "I shouldn't talk to my mom like that."

"Well, yeah." she nodded. "But I meant the thing that you didn't tell me about going to the infirmary."

"What?"

"Next time, you want to do something extremely risky that also involves killing Walkers, you should tell me." she smiled at him slightly. "We could be a team," she added. "Now come on. You ought to apologize to your mom."

He sighed and smiled back at her.

The door opened and something very heavy dropped from her heart. All the tension she had just disappeared when her eyes met with Daryl and his barely noticeable smile.

"Hershel stopped breathing," said Carl to his father. "Mom saved him."

"You all right?" Charlie ignored the father and son conversation, so she could immediately talk with Daryl.

"I'm good," he answered, studying her face not knowing why she was so nervous. "Why shouldn't I?"

It felt strange. Nice...but still strange. She was again worrying about him as if he couldn't take care of himself. If she only knew what he came through, she wouldn't be so worked up over him and his well-being.

"Hey, I'm all right," he said, but his words seemed not to convince her, so he took her hand and placed it on his heart. "I'm good. See?"

Charlie could feel his heart beating and thudding, pumping blood. His skin was warm and his chest was moving as he was breathing. There were no more possible signs to tell that he was alive. She nodded her head and let her breathe out, calming her crazy heart.

"Daddy?" they both heard Maggie asking, so they walked towards the cell.

Another heavy stone fell from her heart. Hershel was all right and alive, and prisoners were taken care of. Everything was looking brighter again. The future was looking just fine.

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