#somehow (sarcasm) i got rly burnt out lol.
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my toxic trait is that i forget that i was still a child after turning like. 12 or something
#not for other ppl I know that teenagers are kids obviously. just not me in my mind im like ughhh i was sooo immature when i was 13#or im like. I cant believe i couldnt take care of myself fully at age 15 We shouldve killed her sort of funny.#i think maybe its bc of you know what. that gave me the warped perception.. Its weird bc i forget im an adult but i also forget thatni was a#child at the time you know. and i forget that obviously iwas a ting stupid bc i was a stupid kid JFNTJFNF.#whatever though cest la vie....#its hudt kind of funny 2 be like nahh i wasnt neglected as a child <- guy who was left basicslly alone in an apartment with very little food#(and whar was there was snacks) very easy access to alcohol and basically no adult supervision for several months. like i was living with my#dad but i pretty much never saw him i only ever saw him when i happened to be in the kitchen at the same time he was LOL. idr if i even saw#lamp very much they were living there too#that was when i was sleeping in the computer room and just fofcing myself to do so much schoolwork. like 50+ lessons a day or something like#that lolll. abd i barely ate anything rly bc that was one of my rules was i was only allowed to eat or do anything fun once my schoolwork#was finished which usually took me like 8 hours. which sort of is bad now im thinking abt it .#oh no ig me and lamp did hang out some rhat was when we umm. well we watched cats and played the hps1 demodisks. that was fun#the schoolwork thing was only for a couple of weeks dont worry#somehow (sarcasm) i got rly burnt out lol.#idr how long i avtually was there i think it was a few months its a very fuzzy time 4 me. i only rly remember the school stuff bc i took a#ton of notes and wrote abt my life and ive read them since then
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