#someday I would absolutely love to find an archive of like

[doedipus]

I feel like at this point I've established enough of a workflow with the menu/calendar and worksheet things that I don't actually need to "borrow" stuff from that one site anymore if I don't want to, which is great because a lot of the sample images they have on that site are so small that even waifu2x can't save them, and I'm running out of the ones that are usable

[theyonlyhadeachother]

i have so many bookmarked midam fics its insane. i dont know if i've read all of the midam fics on ao3, but i've def read a very large majority of them

just a few of my absolute favorites are below the cut. none of them are rated E, but if anyone is interested in some of those, shoot me an ask and let me know

----

Gen, 3,693 words, No Archive Warnings Apply, 1/1 chapters

bound to the marrow of how it feels by paradisecas

Summary: Ask any kid what their superpower would be, nine times out of ten the answer will be flying. Adam, son of a nurse and a bit of a goody-two-shoes, was always the odd one out choosing the noble imaginary superpower of healing people. If Adam could go back in time—and technically, he could—he’d change his answer. Not to flying, and not from healing; he knows now that he can have it all. He’d like to kneel down in front of baby-Adam and say, hey kid, someday you’re going to have everything anyone could ever want at your fingertips, and you’ll be sharing it with the love of your life. You’ll fly straight through the atmosphere and fix broken bones with a snap of your fingers and sit invisible in the corner of a room you’re not allowed in. You’ll eat until you can’t anymore and still have room for seconds. You’ll be able to pick up a car to save a baby, if that situation ever arises, and it won’t even be adrenaline that does it. He wants to say, no matter what nightmares come your way, something good is waiting for you too. You’ll share your body with someone who loves you. You won’t ever be alone again. You’ll always be warm.

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Michael (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Lucifer's Cage (Supernatural), Post-Canon, Michael Possessing Adam Milligan, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, michael dies but he gets better tho

hook and eye series by thishazeleyeddemon

Series rating of Mature, 19,945 words, No Archive Warnings Apply, 2 fics (2/2 and 1/1 respectively)

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Michael (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Sam Winchester, The Empty | The Shadow (Supernatural), Witch Adam Milligan, Episode Fix-It: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, Post-Episode: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, Grief/Mourning, Bitterness, Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Break Up, would you all like to hear about Michael essentially getting his ex to get back together with him, of course you would, Emotional Manipulation, Self-Esteem Issues, Adam Milligan is Not Forgotten, Adam Milligan is So Done, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Adam is such a bitter bitch in this one, it's okay y'all they'll get through it, I just was like Adam can have a little Being Mean and Unreasonable. As a treat, Men of Letters (Supernatural), more tags for Part 2!!, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Gaslighting, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, THE PROMISED. HAPPY ENDING., I REWROTE THIS SO MUCH I AM GOING TO BED, prays the rewriting paid off, Michael Steals From The Rich, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Angelic Grace Kink (Supernatural,) arguably - Freeform, Body Horror, although Adam would gut you for saying such things about Michael, obviously Michael is beautiful and perfect no matter how many eyes, Consensual Possession, Making Out smidgeon of angst. just a spicy dollop, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, by virtue of being a hook and eye-verse fic

Summary of the First Fic: you fit into me like a hook into an eye a fish hook an open eye - Margaret Atwood Michael succumbed to his Father's manipulations. He never wanted to destroy the Earth, but it was so hard, so hard, to find the words to fight back against his father when he was all alone. He never wanted to do that. He never wanted to leave Adam. Adam doesn't know that.

Two Weddings and an Engagement by lumpy_space_princess

Teen, 7,812 words, No Archive Warnings Apply, 1/1

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Gabriel/Eileen Leahy/Rowena MacLeod/Sam Winchester, Michael (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Gabriel (Supernatural), Sam Winchester, Eileen Leahy, Rowena MacLeod, Kevin Tran, Charlie Bradbury, Claire Novak, Kaia Nieves, Dean Winchester, Castiel, Post-Canon Fix-It, Minor Castiel/Dean Winchester, Midam at the Destiel wedding, Midam at the Saileen wedding, Everybody Lives, This is crack so don't think too hard about it, Adam & Kevin & Charlie & Claire & Kaia Michael & Gabriel - Freeform, Fluff and Angst, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Seriously everybody knows it but them, The Love Is Requited They're Just Idiots, They work it out in the end though

Summary: Adam massages fingers over his temples, and tries not to look morose. "Listen. You're not exactly telling me anything I haven't told myself. But there's just - there's baggage there, ok? It's been hard to look at the future when we've barely gotten used to having a present again." He huffs. "Anyway, I don't think he'd even want that. He's an-" "-an archangel, yeah, you've said. It was crap the last time you said it, too." Kevin props himself on his elbows, gazing intently at Adam. "How will you know if you don't try? How is it fair to him, that you just decide what he feels without asking him about it?"  Charlie nods. "Would you want him to treat you that way? It's obviously weighing on you. How would you feel, if he was keeping something this important from you?"  ----------------- Or: Michael and Adam, bless their hearts, are mutually in love. Strangely, they're the only ones who can't seem to see it.

the past is made of stardust (the future's shifting sand) by Anonymous

Teen, 30,461 words, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, 1/1

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Castiel/Dean Winchester, Adam Milligan, Michael (Supernatural), Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural), The Empty | The Shadow (Supernatural), Lucifer's Cage (Supernatural), Post-Lucifer's Cage (Supernatural), Post-Episode: s15e08 Our Father Who Aren't in Heaven, Post-Episode: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, Non-Chronological Fix-It, Post-Canon Fix-It, The Empty (Supernatural), Adam Milligan Saves Michael from the Empty, Michael Possessing Adam Milligan, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Kinda Fluff, Temporary Character Death, i am going to rewrite this. i mean it.

Summary: Adam knocked on the door and waited. And waited. And waited. He knocked again, and then it opened to Sam brandishing a gun, Dean behind him with a knife and a bottle of whiskey. When they saw him, they didn’t relax, but they didn’t attack either. “Adam?” Sam asked, hesitantly. “Or… Michael?” Adam knew he had to look ridiculous. Before, they’d seen him while he still had an archangel maintaining his body, but after the last day and a half? He was sweaty and sunburnt and dehydrated and he could almost feel the bags under his eyes. But another gift of the Cage was losing the ability to give a fuck what he looked like. “Michael isn't home right now,” Adam said. “And I’d like to know why.”

Mirror Of Change by QuicksilverCastiel

Teen, 2,127 words, No Archive Warnings Apply, 1/1

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Serafina (Supernatural), Michael (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Raphael (Supernatural), Serafina is going through it, Or at least she's bluescreening on account of Michael's heart-eyes at Adam, Also Heaven ecology yay!, they/them pronouns for Raphael

Summary: When all is said and done, God defeated and the world righted again, Serafina takes on her biggest challenge yet: Going back to Heaven. Not to stay, but to see if the rumour of it 'changing' have any truth to it. Turn out, at least some archangels have definitely changed. And it may be because of another Adam.

your mother's son by darkmillennium

Teen, 10,633 words, No Archive Warnings Apply, 1/1

Tags: Michael/Adam Milligan, Michael & Adam Milligan, Michael (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Alternate Michael's Grace-Enhanced Monsters, POV Adam Milligan, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Slice of Life, Fluff and Humor, Post-Episode: s15e08 Our Father Who Aren't in Heaven, Michael Possessing Adam Milligan, Adam Milligan is So Done, Developing Relationship, Romantic Tension, listen they're in love with each other we've all seen it, this is just 10k words of michael and adam living life, Enochian-Speaking Adam Milligan, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence

Summary: Adam wants a normal life. He really does. He wants, at least, as close to a normal life as he can get after spending ten years—a thousand years—in the Cage. And he’s got it, mostly. He’s got an apartment and a job and a closet full of clothes that aren’t the clothes he went to Hell in. He thinks he’s been managing pretty great, all things considered. But one day, Michael warns him that he’s sensed a pack of werewolves move into the area, and then people start dropping dead with their hearts ripped out, and.. Life isn't going to be as relaxed as he'd like it to be, is it?

[blasphemous-lies-and-deceit]

Flufftober Day 14. Fantasy AU/Mundane AU

It wasn't often that Michael really, truly hated his job. 

The day to day was both aggravating but engaging, doing whatever research and follow up Gertrude assigned to him, and trying his best to organize the Archives when he didn't have an assignment to work on. Despite not working for the Institute, Gerry was there with him most days, helping with the harder jobs and keeping him company. Michael absolutely didn't mind that‒ Gerry was a delight to be around, and made it far less lonely to be in the expansive empty Archives. That part of his job, he didn't hate.

But every so often Gertrude gave Gerry a task that he couldn't refuse, sending him away for days or weeks after information or an artifact that was far too dangerous to obtain using the usual methods. And Michael had to kiss his beloved goodbye and hope against hope that he would come back to him again.

"Oh, thank god," Michael breathed when his bedroom door opened and revealed Gerry standing there, looking so exhausted he could barely stand. "Are you okay? Are you hurt? Here‒" he got up on his knees on the bed, arms open and reaching for him. Gerry collapsed right into them, his abrupt weight sending them both sprawling back on the bed. Michael wrapped his arms and legs around Gerry, holding tight as Gerry did the same, holding him so close he could feel how badly he was trembling. "Oh, Gerry. What happened?"

"I don't‒" Gerry cut himself off with a harsh noise, burying his face in Michael's neck. "I don't want to talk about it." He sounded near tears, and Michael felt his throat tighten in sympathy and worry. "Can we pretend the Entities and shit don't exist for a minute? Please?"

"Of course." Michael rolled them so they were on their sides, keeping Gerry close in the circle of his limbs as he grabbed at one of his blankets, tucking it in tight around them. "You just got back from some long boring business trip, and now you're back here with me."

Gerry made another noise, soft and disbelieving. "I'm a businessman?" he asked, sounding amused beneath his exhaustion.

"It's the most boring job imaginable," Michael continued, ducking a hand beneath Gerry's clothes and rubbing up and down his back. "The most exciting thing that happened on your trip was that the bartender at the hotel bar tried flirting with you, and you had to ask her to stop because you were married."

"Oh my god," Gerry whimpered, pressing his face harder into his neck. "We're married. Changed my mind, I fucking love this life."

"And then you came home to your loving husband," Michael told him, heart burning from Gerry's affirmation. "Who is so excited and happy to see you, because I missed you so much. And I'll tell you about my day working at the library, and the kids I read picture books to, and the old ladies I helped find mystery novels to read. We swap stories over dinner and go to bed early, just to make up for the time we were apart. I'll hold you close, just like this‒" Michael gave Gerry a demonstrative hug, pressing a kiss to the side of his head "-and neither of us will have nightmares."

"Fuck," Gerry sighed, shifting even closer and tilting his head up to kiss the underside of Michael's jaw. "I want that so much, Michael, I want us to have that someday. Please tell me we can have that, please."

"We will," Michael promised, ducking his head to seal it with a kiss. "Someday we'll be out of the Archives, and it won't follow after us, and we can live out our lives together without any other supernatural shit. We're gonna be so damn boring we won't know what to do with ourselves."

"I'll never be bored with you," Gerry swore, eyes still glittering and wet, but so full of love that Michael's heart ached with it. "Our lives might be boring, but with you I'll always be happy. So happy. I‒" he cut off with a hard swallow, tears spilling over, and Michael tucked him back against his chest, a few tears of his own slipping down his cheeks into Gerry's dark hair. That life he'd imagined them having seemed so far away at the moment, but one day, someday, they would be living it. 

[mamadoc]

I love your work! Any fics by other writers you recommend?

Thank you, Anon! I appreciate your kindness as well as the question.

I will admit that I don’t read as much now that I’ve started writing. But here are a few of my favorites:

1- @makeitastrength adina_rachelle

She’s my absolute favorite. It was because of her writing that I started reading fanfiction. Prior to ever reading any fanfiction, I made an incorrect and ignorant assumption that fanfiction would be poor quality, and her work is anything but. She particularly loves to write the missing scenes/in between moments. Her grammar is perfect. She writes very in character scenes that you can totally see play out in your mind.

2- @girlintotv

She’s written a lot of great AU. Her plot lines are well planned out and intricate. Her descriptions are beautiful. “Let’s Get Together” she recently finished, and it’s soooo much better than Parent Trap movies.

3- @ellitheria

She would be considered the queen of the Chenford fanfiction kingdom. She needs no further introduction.

4- MeadowWard

It was her work that convinced me to start reading AU. This is my absolute favorite story of hers.

5- TheChandom

They have several good stories and a series of in between moments that are great.

6- moonycpd

Their “Darling, Let’s Run” is one of my favorite AU stories.

7- PiperElizabeth

She has a few AUs that are great. “Someday” is my favorite of hers.

8- wisedgirl

“After The Tone” is one I’ve read at least three times. So good!

9- @centralperkchenford naimsagram

She has a CONSTANT flow of stories that I can barely keep up with to feed the fandom.

10- ginger_dame

She did a long series of in between moments that was amazing.

11- murphalo

“Plus One” is hilarious and a great read.

12- lucychens

“Christmas With The Bradfords” is my favorite.

14 - @silverskull

You can *feel* what they write. Amazing. Very poetic and verbose.

15 - @thisnightissparkling089

I’ve recently started reading her works. She has a story she’s recently started about infertility that’s very heartfelt. You can really feel the emotions of the characters.

16 - @queseraone

Several great stories to choose from.

17 - @wanna-be-bold

“With This Ring” is a great one, but they have several great stories.

18 - @chenfordspiral

I’m super behind on my reading on this one, but her “Little Bit of Love” is amazing.

19 - Cleromanticon

They have a story called “Omne Malum ab Homine” that is like watching an intense The Rookie movie. I hope they come back to finish it soon.

20 - breebaqbooks

“Where Our Hearts Meet” is an amazing soulmate AU. I was skeptical about soulmate AUs until I read this. So good!

Well, Anon, that was probably more than you wanted from your simple question. But if you read my stories, you know I’m a bit long-winded. 😬🤫 So perhaps this is what you expected all along. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thanks for question. Perhaps it will help someone else find a new story or writer they love. This list is definitely not complete. There are a lot of other writers out there that are great.

Feel free to browse my bookmarks on AO3 if you’d like some more recommendations. That’s how I found a lot of my favorite writers and stories.

[gnomeyflamingo]

Atreo: “Huh? I thought this would just be an uneventful rabbit hole like the Ferris Wheel… But it’s an actual ride? Was Acco right?”

*lights go out and ride stops*

Atreo: “Uhm… What’s happening?”

Zehra: “ATREO HI!!”

Atreo: “AHHHHHH!!!”

Zehra: “IT’S ME, ZEHRA!”

Atreo: “Zehra?! Why are you shouting? And more importantly why are you here? Omw this ride has become absolutely terrifying.”

Zehra: “Sorry, I’m still a little deaf. The last vampire I killed really screeched whilst begging for mercy. I get it you are a widower with five adopted kids, you don’t have to blow out my ear drums.”

Atreo: “Uhm…”

Zehra: “Anyway as I was wiping off the dust, I suddenly got an idea to win your affection, so I rushed over here because… I will help you!”

Atreo: “Help me with what?”

Zehra: “To seduce sims. Fulfill your aspiration! You really need the help my love.”

Zehra: “After the whole cheating with Derya thing and the T-pose curse-”

Atreo: “You know about that? How?!”

Zehra: “I know everything about you. I also know everything about everyone you've ever talked to… What they eat. Their daily schedules. Their darkest secrets... Which will be super helpful when you seduce them! Meet me at the abandoned shack in Moonwood Mill tomorrow night. I’ll be waiting with a surprise! Bye my love.”

*runs off*

Atreo: “Wait! Is Derya dead..? Did you kill her?”

*Eerie silence*

Atreo: “I-Is she gone? The lights are back on… Did the ride stop because of Zehra?”

*nervously hums Dobsie Boppsie Barm by The Persimmon Confidential*

Atreo: “Okay, I’m off to find the other sims for safety.”

It’s time for Acco to age up…

Lilith: “BLOW OUT THOSE CANDLES KID! THIS IS WHAT I EXIST FOR!”

Alejandro: “That’s the spirit Lilith!”

Brielle: “Come on sweetie!”

Atreo: “Do it! Make a wish!”

Acco: "I wish to ride a horse someday!”

And as Kiry serenades the night’s sky with an air horn, Acco grows up into a teen!

He’s creative and loyal with the Bestselling Author aspiration.

After Acco’s age up, everyone finally gets the chance to fill up their neglected hunger bars with cake.

Atreo: “You grew up quite handsome. We share good genes.”

Acco: “Thanks bro, that’s a big compliment coming from you.”

Atreo: “I have a birthday gift for you. I made it after the whole fake nanny ordeal we won’t go into.”

Acco: “Really you want to give me a friendship bracelet? Of course, of course, of course!”

Atreo: “Ok calm down-.”

Acco: “I’d love to share this special bond with you.”

*hugs*

Acco: “Not in my wildest, most insane dreams did I ever think you would want to be bracelet buddies with me.”

Atreo: “Don’t read too much into it, I just wanted to do this cool fist bump, watch!”

Acco: “AHHH BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!”

To be continued...

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❧ Back to the Legacy Archive

[badgod01]

Ducklings: Headcanons & Authors Notes

As a celebration for 100 Kudos on Ducklings, here are some of my headcanons for the various characters featured as well as some ANs! This one's going to be a bit on the shorter side, as I don't really have much to say on any of these topics.

Ducklings

Grian was initially written with female genitalia (in the scene of him riding Mumbo), but I wrote Tango's scene with the dick so I had to rewrite a small part of the fic.

There wasn't much edited out when the parts were rewritten; except instead of Mumbo touching a clit to make Grian come, it was a dick.

The fic was initially only going to include Mumbo and Grian, but I decided to add Scar. Then I decided to add Tango.

I wanted to write more with Ren (hence the dialogue) and Doc, or maybe a threesome with the both of them (you know, war things), but I was unable to find words or a plot I was satisfied adding in. I just began losing the writing energy right there and then for that fic.

This is the first fic to have the Dom TangoTek tag and the second fic to have the Top TangoTek tag, both facts that I find incredibly funny.

Grian

I imagine Grian to have wings. I saw someone headcanon him as having barn owl wings, so that's typically the interpretation I go for.

However, Ducklings!Grian was not imagined to have wings or any sort of nonhuman features. I would have mentioned it if he does.

I don't really view Grian as a whore, it's just more-or-less him being dragged along that path. He's 100% consenting in all of these scenarios, including Tango's (though I understand if that seems a bit dubious from his wording).

Actually quite versatile in both power dynamic and position, though I only stuck with bottom G for this one. He doms the life out of Mumbo, though.

Mumbo

Absolute sopping wet cat of a man.

I did not write him with any sort of species in mind but I love vampire Mumbo.

Sub top all the way.

Mumbo and Grian are in a relationship. It's not that they're partners, though; the closest definition I have for their relationship is queer-platonic. (I don't think Grian would appreciate a typical relationship dynamic, hence his and Mumbo's arrangement.) The other Hermits are just sex partners for the both of them. PolyHermits and all that jazz.

I did not add a large dick tag for Mumbo but he does have that.

As noticed, I write him to be slightly sadistic—it's not unfounded. I think he 100% is sadistic, and some of my favorite fics explore this aspect of him. I just stuck with light sadism/masochism (scratching).

Taller than Grian and is about Scar's height (or shorter... or taller than him), but is a twig in comparison to Scar's muscles.

Scar

Other than Grian, I quite like Scar solely off of personality alone.

I imagine him to be versatile in both power dynamic and position, similar to Grian, though he definitely leans more to a bratty side; sorta in the vein of castys' insatiable.

Taller than Grian, muscular, and absolutely dwarfs him in size.

He has a redstone-powered cane with a button on it which toggles a piston underneath for the spiked bottom. I very much include disability as part of his character and may write a wheelchair in for him someday.

Tango

I solely included him just because I was watching supercuts of the original Decked Out and the creation of Decked Out 2. It looks fun!

I'm not too familiar with Tango's season 9 stuff, so I'm not quite sure what his species is. Whatever it is, it's what's in the fic. (Blaze...ish? Isn't blue flame the hottest? It's whatever.)

The species being he has cold features rather than the warm ones I imagine Blazes to have. His extremities are cold (like his fingers, his feet, and his dick). He's endothermic, basically, and has similar features to Skeppy in Good For You.

[xxcookiecrumbsxx]

Another drabble. V similar to the last one sorry. They talk about their future together.

Full below

one semester after end of season one

“Enid,” Wednesday greeted.

Enid looked up, sniffling. “Hi.”

Wednesday immediately approached her bed. “Why are you crying?” Her tone sounded neutral to untrained ears but Enid could hear the hint of compassion.

“It’s stupid.”

Wednesday sat next to her. “Maybe I’ll think it’s stupid, yes, but that’s never stopped you before.”

Enid sighed.

Wednesday spoke again, softer, and laid a hand on Enid’s arm gently. “Even if I think it’s stupid, you obviously care. And I care if you care.”

Enid finally looked up, red rimmed eyes meeting seemingly cold ones.

“I just, are, um, are you going to break up with me when we graduate?”

Wednesday looked slightly taken aback. “We still have more than a year left.”

Enid picked at a loose thread on her comforter. “Do you not think we’ll even be together that long?” she asked, her voice quiet and somehow both sad and nervous with a forced neutrality.

Wednesday’s hand immediately landed on top of hers. “I just thought we had more time to discuss this, I didn’t know it would already be on your mind. I don’t intend to break up with you at graduation. I had hoped we could find a university we would both be happy with and continue to be roommates. Unless that does not sound acceptable to you.”

Enid wiped her tears, obviously calmer now. “Yes, yes that sounds good.”

Wednesday picked up Enid’s hand and brought it to her lips for a kiss, then continued to hold it in both of hers. Enid blushed, finally meeting Wednesday’s now intense gaze.

“Enid, I intend to be with you for the rest of my life. An Addams does nothing halfway, absolutely the least of which romantic affection. I am yours infinitely unless you someday decide you no longer wish to have me.”

More tears sprang to Enid’s eyes and Wednesday’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Why are you crying more?”

Enid laughed. “Because that was so romantic, silly. It made me emotional. In a good way.”

Wednesday nodded slowly, pressing another kiss to her hand. “I’m still getting aquatinted with the idea of being emotional in a good way.” She reached out to wipe the tears off Enid’s face. “Do you feel better?”

Enid nodded and squeezed Wednesday’s hand in hers. “Yes.” She scooted closer to Wednesday. “Permission to kiss you?”

“Granted,” Wednesday said immediately, making Enid grin. She kissed Wednesday softly, barely a brush of their lips.

Wednesday blushed as she said, “permission granted to kiss more than that, if desired.”

Enid laughed, leaning in to kiss Wednesday with more force and bringing her hand up to her cheek.

one semester before graduation

Wednesday had never seen Enid look so small as when she hung up on her still yelling mother.

Wednesday had never been good at comforting people. There hadn’t been many attempts, if she was being honest. There hadn’t been many people she’d wanted to comfort in her life, not before Enid. Now she regretted her inability as the girl she loved most in the whole world barely restrained her sobs.

“Enid-“

Enid interrupted her with a voice both harsh and watery. “Don’t. I-I don’t want to talk about it right now.” She paused before adding in a whisper. “I just need a minute.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

Enid shook her head vigorously, the tears starting to fall down her cheeks now in heavy streams. She sniffled. “No,” she said as firmly as she could before turning to a vulnerable whisper once again. “Can you come here?”

Wednesday couldn’t say no to the desperation in her voice if she tried. She was immediately on her feet and at Enid’s bedside. She’d never felt so much compassion and sympathy for another person in her life. It felt like someone stabbed her in the chest, not in a pleasant way, seeing Enid so deeply upset, especially having watched it all play out.

“Can you hold me, please?” she asked, voice incredibly broken.

Wednesday propped her head up against Enid’s pillow, otherwise laying, and Enid laid between her legs and on top of her, head to her chest. Wednesday’s arms wrapped around her tightly.

Enid finally let the dam break in the comfort of her embrace, loud sobs ringing out against her neck.

Enid had called to tell her parents about their relationship. Wednesday had gathered their lack of compassion when Enid failed to wolf out on their timeline, but she still wasn’t prepared for the amount of bigotry and hatred she heard spewed on the phone just now at hearing that their daughter was queer.

She squeezed Enid tighter, occasionally pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head.

She hadn’t had high hopes for their response, and neither had Enid. But despite both being surprised by the level of their disapproval, Enid had tried to prepare for the worst. She waited until she was 18 to tell them, until she was already set to graduate Nevermore with Wednesday. While she didn’t exactly have a plan for this worst case scenario, she wasn’t quite as stuck under them.

It took nearly half an hour for her crying to subside, but eventually it did. Wednesday continued holding her tightly in silence, one hand drawing comforting patterns lightly on her back.

“Wednesday?” she finally whispered, her voice cracked from her crying.

“Yes, my love?”

Enid moved to lay next to her so they could face each other. If Wednesday’s heart wasn’t breaking for this beautiful girl before, it shattered the moment she saw the depth of the sadness and fear in her ocean eyes.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

Wednesday lightly laid a hand on her cheek, stroking her still damp tear streaks.

“I’ve already expressed my intention to be with you forever. My family has already accepted you, fully, as one of their own.” She pressed a firm kiss to her forehead. “We’re going to take care of you, Enid. I don’t want you to worry even a little.”

Enid nodded and sniffled, more tears filling her eyes.

“You’re an Addams now. You have been for a while.”

End nodded again. After a few minutes of silent contemplation Enid spoke again.

“I can get a job, when we get settled in Boston.”

Wednesday shook her head, finding Enid’s hands to hold them both in hers. “You will do no such thing. I’m not exaggerating, Enid. We are going to take care of you. I’ve already discussed it with my family, I apologize for keeping it from you. Your tuition to Emerson will be paid in full, as will our shared living expenses.”

Enid’s eyes widened. “Wednesday-“

She squeezed Enid’s hands to stop her. “Enid, you saved my life. Don’t get any ideas, but even if you break my heart my family intends to care for you. Don’t make me list all of the threats attached to your refusal.”

Enid finally broke a small grin. “Okay, okay. I accept the overwhelming generosity.”

Wednesday gave a curt nod. “Good. My only other idea to convince you was proposing a bit earlier than I’d planned.”

Enid raised a brow. “A bit? Are you planning to propose soon?”

Wednesday was silent for a long moment, one hand running through Enid’s hair.

“I’ve said too much.”

(A/N: Wednesday was willing to go to whatever university Enid wanted, at least for undergrad. When Enid decided she wanted to study journalism she picked Emerson because that’s where her favorite journalist, Nancy Wheeler, went to school)

[heroesriseandfall]

Hello! Just a fellow BatFam fan stopping by to say that I absolutely love the way you tag the different relationships! (I've spent over 2 hours going through your Tumblr now, lol). I know this might result in a super long response (and no need to answer right away!), but is there a reason behind each name? Anyhow, hope you have a wonderful rest of the week!

Thank you, glad you enjoy it! (my blog is indeed an archive free for perusing. or that's what I use it for too, anyway.)

All of them come from quotes in the comics about the characters. I have a post here about the source of each quote and which tags go with which characters.

Basically, I just wanted dedicated tags on my blog to store and find things about specific character dynamics I love, but the usual way of tagging that would be a ship name (unhelpful when it’s about a platonic relationship, since nowadays people assume ship name = romantic) or just “firstname 1 and firstname 2” (nice and simple, sometimes I use it for duos I haven’t chosen a tag for yet, but not very poetic, you know?). So I did this, much like I've seen other people do for various topics and fandoms.

I want to make more but I get indecisive about which quotes to use or can’t think of a good one. That’s why, for example, I currently have no tag for my beloved Babs & Cass duo, and many more :( but when I do think of new ones, I add them to the reference post I linked. I might someday add more romantic or could-be-romantic-OR-platonic relationships to it but since I can already use ship names for those, for now it's mainly been platonic relationships.

[freddiefredfive]

A Part of Your World

Chapter 4: Poor Unfortunate Soul

Bradford waited for Triton right where he left them, crossing his arms and flipping his tail impatiently. He stoically caught a glimpse of a group of baby sea turtles that swam past him, but was too wrapped up in his anger to really take notice. Sebastian anxious and he turned to Bradford.

(Artwork by @gmache)

“It's almost sunset,” Sebastian stated anxiously, “I hope he’s alright…”

“This is ridiculous” Bradford said, “How dare he bring an entire army to the surface without utilizing them?! Triton doesn’t know what he’s doing. We’re going up there!”

Bradford turned to his army and yelled out, “ATTENTION! King Triton has not yet returned. We will go to the surface and fight those disgusting humans ourselves!”

The army prepared their weapons and assumed position for attack. However, just before Bradford made the signal to go forward, Triton returned to the group as fast as he could swim back to them.

“STOP!” Triton cried, “I’m alright!”

“Oh thank Neptune!” Sebastian cried as he swam up to Triton, “What happened?! What did you see?”

“I saw the humans,” Triton replied, “I saw one of them using this large contraption to pour things like the dinglehopper and that round thing that scratched me straight into the ocean. It was terrible… I was ready to turn back and bring the whole army up to make them stop. However, I saw this one… absolutely lovely human that seemed so different from the rest. She was helping these young sea turtles and her hair was shimmering as if the sun had kissed her. She had eyes that were as colorful as the scales of a parrotfish. She was so caring for those who were under the ocean. I initially couldn’t believe that any human was capable of empathy like the kind she showed. Even after all these years since Athena was…”

“So they WERE dumping their trash in our domain?” Bradford asked, cutting off Triton.

“Yes,” Triton sighed, “But that one kind human could be their only hope! I must find her.”

“Triton, think rationally!” Sebastian laughed, only to stop suddenly when he saw Bradford stare him down in disgust, “…You know that we merpeople are only capable to last only a consecutive hour above the water.”

“Sebastian, Bradford… please just listen,” Triton begged, “I need to see that human again. I’ve never seen one just like her. Maybe I have been thinking about humans all wrong. Yes, there are some terrible ones out there but if there are more good ones like her, then maybe we can come to a compromise someday.”

Bradford's disinterest in this conversation suddenly turned into him reading into every word Triton said. Perhaps Triton’s sudden interest in a human could be the perfect way he can finally be brought to his knees.

“Sebastian, Triton might be onto something…” Bradford finally spoke up, “There must be some spell you can use to make him human so he can travel above the ocean.”

Sebastian was quite hesitant. Bradford rarely agreed with Triton on anything so this sudden change of heart was… suspicious. He wanted to warn Triton that this may be a trap, but he was afraid of any repercussions from Bradford.

“Well— Uhm… You see I don’t know if this is a good idea…” Sebastian stuttered, only to be cut off once again by Bradford.

“Sebastian! Do not talk back to our King!” Bradford shouted, “You have been quite the nay-sayer today.”

“Bradford, leave him alone,” Triton growled, “He’s the Master Sorcerer. Therefore, his opinion is valuable. Sebastian, are you sure there is no safe way for me to travel into the human world?”

Sebastian saw the desperate look in Triton’s eyes. He knew one spell that may be too dangerous for him but… the way he was talking about a human made it sound like he was in love. Something he was hoping his friend would finally find again. Who was Sebastian to stand in the way of Triton’s happiness, after all the times he protected him from Bradford?

“Yes,” Sebastian sighed in defeat, “There is one spell I know… We need to return to my quarters first.”

Triton gathered Sebastian in his arms and hugged him so tightly that almost his friend’s scales pop off.

“Thank you dear friend!” Triton beamed, “Let us return at once!”

With a wicked grin on his face, Bradford happily ordered the entire army to promptly return to Antlantis. No one in the army was allowed to know why they were returning. Mentioning this event to anyone outside of the army was strictly forbidden until further notice, by order of King Triton.

After Triton returned home, he eagerly swam straight to his girls’ room. Not knowing how or if he would ever return to Antlantis again after taking this leap, he took his time holding and talking with each girl… almost like he did in the early morning. Triton wasn’t sure how to explain to his daughters that he was planning to travel to the human world, but he knew that he had to say something.

“My girls… I know I just returned but soon I must go out again on another journey,” Triton said somberly, “I dread leaving you but I truly must go on this.”

“Did you find where the dingehopper came from?” Ariel asked.

“The… what?” Aquata asked.

“I… I did.” Triton replied, unsure if he should explain this situation to his notoriously curious daughter. If he was too specific, Ariel would probably try to go to the human world again. While he had newfound faith in humans, Triton still knew what horrors they were capable of.

“What was their world like?” Ariel asked.

“Uh… well, I only saw a small portion of it,” Triton continued, “I hate to tell you this, Ariel, but while The dinglehopper may be used for hair, I saw many of them being discarded into our waters. Darlings, some of these humans are polluting our waters. However I found one human that could be different. She was beautiful and kind. I never saw anyone like her. I have to see her to…”

“Oooh! Father has a crush!” Attina giggled, followed by her other sisters.

“What? No, this will be a strictly cordial meeting.” Triton defended himself.

“Father, don’t be so defensive!” Aquata cried, “We know that losing Mother was the hardest thing.”

“We’re happy for you!” Andrina added.

“Please don’t think I’m trying to replace her.” Triton said somberly.

“Father, it’s alright if that’s how you’re feeling about her,” Ariel comforted him by holding his hands, “I think mother would want you to be happy…”

Triton smiled and nodded, “I’m starting to think so too… Come here, girls.”

All the girls came together to hug their father as tightly as they could, giving Triton encouragement to pursue the human woman. Even if they weren’t sure how it was going to work out between them, their main concern was their father’s happiness. Triton and Athena certainly raised their girls to be empathetic and compassionate, making them the best supporters Triton didn’t know he needed up until now.

“Alright… A couple of starfish fins, some crushed up turtle shells, and a pinch of sand salt…” Sebastian said aloud as he started to make the potion for Triton.

He was down in his chambers, mixing the ingredients you need in a large caldron, when Triton and Bradford finally entered the room. Bradford had a bit of pep in his tail as he swam over to where the cauldron was. Triton just assumed it was because Bradford was looking forward to seeing what discoveries his brother would make but he’d soon learn that wasn’t the case.

“How much longer?” Bradford asked, looming over Sebastian.

“J-just a few more minutes,” Sebastian said, trembling over his words.

“Patience, brother!” Triton cried, “We don’t want this spell to go awry.”

“Yes, of course, we don’t…” Bradford retorted under his breath, “We must protect our precious king…”

As Sebastian gave a few more big stirs in the pot, Bradford looked around the room and saw that Sebastian’s spell book was wide open. He observed the book and read the spell to himself.

Transformation Spell

Ingredients: 3 1/4 shellfuls of jellyfish jelly, 2 seaspoons of seacow milk, 10 starfish fins, 2 shellfuls of crushed turtle shells, half a seaspoon of sand salt

Recite: Trade fins for legs and gills for lungs, a human for a month I will become!

Bradford then read the warning labels at the bottom of the page in small red letters.

“Warning: The participant needs to find someone who confesses their truest love for them… or else they will dissolve into seafoam for all eternity.”

Bradford smiled mischievously at the thought of his brother being reduced to seafoam. The disclaimer was so small, so unnoticeable. He almost missed it himself if he didn’t read it as carefully as he did.

“Surely, no one would mind if I just… discard this…” Bradford thought to himself as he quietly ripped the disclaimer out of the book, crumpled it up, and stuffed it in the back of the bookshelf next to him.

Sebastian nodded in approval once he felt ready to start the spell. He took a ladle and poured mixture into a cup and held it out to Triton.

“Do be careful out there, your highness,” Sebastian warned, “You’re stepping into a whole new way of living that you’re not accustomed to.”

“I understand, Sebastian,” Triton nodded in agreement, “I’ll do my best to blend in with the humans.”

He looked down at the strange concoction that was a swirling mixture of green and purple. It made him begin to feel uneasy at the sight, knowing that he was putting something as dangerous as magic into his body.

“Are you sure that this spell doesn’t come with any repercussions?” Triton asked.

Bradford knew that he had to stop Sebastian from telling Triton the truth about the spell, so he decided to cause an aversion.

“Well… there is a catch—” Sebastian began as he placed the concoction on the table beside him.

He soon was startled by Bradford screaming, “DEAR NEPTUNE, SEBASTIAN. WHAT’S THAT?!”

Triton and Sebastian turn their heads to where Bradford was pointing, making Sebastian‘s glasses fly off his face. While they weren’t looking, Bradford covered the ripped edge of the page with another book.

“Oh…” Bradford chuckled, “It’s only a picture of your mother, Sebastian. I apologize…”

Sebastian tried to look at Bradford with annoyance but since he couldn’t see without his glasses, he couldn’t tell where Bradford was. He swam to the floor, searching for his glasses.

“Ugh, it’s alright…” He sighed, “Triton, if you want to look at the spell, the book is already open on the right page.”

Triton nodded and swam to the book, telling Bradford, “Brother, I understand you’re nervous but please don’t scare us like that.”

“My apologies, brother,” Bradford replied, smiling wickedly once Triton passed him.

Triton read the spell, failing to notice the ripped edge. Once he realized that the spell lasted a month, he was utterly shocked. A month as a human? A day or two is easy but a whole month of dealing with these potentially harmful creatures, besides the female human he saw, made him as scared as a child again. Memories of losing Athena rushed through him again and he almost considered backing out.

“Are you sure there’s no way we can shorten this spell?” Triton gulped, “I’d be away for a whole month…”

“Sadly no,” Sebastian replied, still looking for his glasses, “But if you really want to see this human, you should take your time with it.”

“Absolutely,” Bradford agreed, playing the part of the ‘supportive’ brother. “Antlantis wasn’t built in a day. You’re… brave and very strong willed. I can assure you that you’ll be fine. This opportunity to meet her may not come again and you’ll live to regret it.”

Triton took a deep breath, letting Bradford’s words calm him. He turned his brother with a kind smile and put his hands on his shoulders, pulling him in for a tight hug. Not being the warm and friendly type, Bradford stiffened at the hug.

“Thank you, dear Bradford,” Triton sighed, “I can’t back out now… not when I feel the way I do about her. You know that in my absence, you must take over as king.”

“Oh really?” Bradford asked, pretending to be clueless, “I almost forgot…”

“I trust you, brother, but you and I both know that being king is a huge responsibility,” Triton continued, “With each decision you make, you must regard every citizen. From the tiniest of planktons to the largest of whales. Heavy is the head who wears the crown…”

(Artwork by @gmache)

“Oh trust me, brother, Antlantis is in safe hands…” Bradford smirked as he began to sing:

( https://youtu.be/jAcrYDjTmrQ )

“I admit that in the past I've been quite nasty

I’m not kidding when I say I’m not a saint.

But you'll know that when I’m king, I'll be mending all my ways, repent, see the light, and make a switch to this.

True? Yes.

And I fortunately we’ve got a little magic

It's a talent that dear Sebastian has possessed.

And dear brother, please do know, I’ll use it on behalf of the miserable, the lonely, and depressed (pathetic) poor unfortunate souls! In pain, in need.

They want the taxes to be lower. They want their rights to be more equal. And do I help them?

Ugh, I suppose…

Those poor unfortunate souls! So sad, but true!

They’ll come flocking to my throne, crying, ‘King Bradford, help us, please!’ and I will help them?

I suppose…

Now it's happened once or twice

You and I have disagreed

And I’ve expressed that you’ve really lost your mind!

Yes, siblings will always fight, but on the whole, you’ve been a saint to those poor unfortunate souls!”

Bradford returned the hug to Triton, initiating a hug for the first time in a while. Triton was ultimately shocked but took this as a sign of love from his brother. He held his brother tightly for a minute, unsure if he’d actually see him again. After letting go of the hug, Triton picked up the concoction, ready to drink it.

“Sebastian, thank you so much for this opportunity,” Triton called out, “I promise that you and Bradford will keep Antlantis safe in my absence.”

“WAIT, WHAT?!” Sebastian cried finally got a hold of his glasses and tried to put them on his face as quickly as he could, “Wait! Wait! You don’t know—!”

“Trade fins for legs and gills for lungs, a human for a month I will become!” Triton recited, then finally gulped down the concoction in one swift motion. Soon, he noticed that the scales of his tail began to glow with a strange white light. He soon started to levitate up through an open window, closing his eyes as the potion's magic began to course through his entire body violently.

Sebastian watched in horror as he saw his new king, Bradford laughed wickedly and sing:

“You really think that girl up there will be your lover? Your predictability is really such a bore!

These humans don’t care for us, they’ll find us and kill each one of us. Antlantis will see you as a traitor and turn to me!

Come on! First, you hate them first and now you love them.

You don’t know how to see these fools but you’ll dote and swoon and fawn on a lady who'll withdraw.

When my army gets to them, we’ll rule the world!

Come on you poor unfortunate soul! Go ahead! Find this ‘love’!

King Bradford’s here to stay and it’s time for me to shine.

Lover-boy Triton is out and I AM IN!

You poor unfortunate soul! So sad but true!

If you want to find romance, go then, and let the REAL king rule!

Take a gulp and take a breath, and watch your fall become my rise!

Sebastian, you coward, you listen to me now!

The boss is on a roll!

Triton, the poor unfortunate soul!”

Soon, everything in the room and outside the window went white. No one truly could tell what was going on, not even Sebastian, since he had studied this spell but never used it in real life. Before Sebastian and Bradford knew it, Triton was gone.

To be continued…

[forgottensomewhere]

(I'm a little bit not very smart so I apologize if I answer something wrong lol)

1. A deer jawbone that I found at a railroad track

2. A bee in a lil dome

3. A wet specimen of a rat that I named Ratthew

4. Part of a squirrel skull, I'm just mad that it broke when I dug it up :(

5. 30ish?????

6. Yeah

7. Taxidermy pigeon (I forget the exact amount but it was around $200)

8. Something I scavenged probably

9. Pig or cow skull

10. I don't know but I really like ribs and vertebrae

11. Rabbit

12. I think it would be cool if I could get a wet specimen of a fawn

13. 🤷

14. I like finding things myself because for me it feels like something I earned but I still buy stuff

15. Yeah

16. Nah, I feel really sad when I see roadkill so I could never hunt lol I would feel so bad

17. Water

18. Yeah

19. I think I started collecting little things here and there when I was like 15

20. Oh yeah absolutely. Plenty of my friends get a little bit weirded out, the running joke is they can never take me anywhere because I'm always trying to pick up carcasses.

21. Yeah I have a few friends who are also into it

22. 🤷

23. Nopeeeee

24. Bones from juvenile squirrels

25. Taxidermy pigeon

26. No

27. No but I would really like to learn someday

28. No

29. Definitely taxidermy

30. Nah I like having my little hoard I would want to keep everything for myself lol

31. Yeah probably

32. I love seeing all of the cool collections, I get so jealous but it's so awesome

33. 🤷

34. One time when I was changing out the water in a maceration bucket and I somehow managed to get a little bit of water splashback in my mouth oh my God I was so grossed out and terrified of getting sick

35. See the answer to question 34

36. Nope

37. Yeah

38. A deer head I found on the side of the road

39. I have a part of the skull of my pet love bird that passed away a long time ago. When my dog passes away I'll probably just have him cremated and keep the ashes

40. Honestly I'm not as well versed as I should be😅 (don't worry I'm looking into it now)

41. Not as much time as I wish but I enjoy the little bits of time I can set aside

42. Yeah

43. @earthenremains @graveyardharmony @breathing-rapture

44. I would like to

45. Not really

46. I think I kind of just fell into it. Ever since I was little I always loved collecting little trinkets and stuff and then it gradually became more like collecting bugs and bones and all of that.

47. Nope I think it's funny when people find me off putting because of my hobby

48. A little bit, I am a Hades devotee so death and all of that kind of ties into it

49. I really like collecting bones and taxidermy and all of that stuff because it feels like giving the poor little creature a second purpose. Instead of leaving it to rot away and be forgotten, I cherish the things that I find

50. Aside from the really obvious hobby, I really like to read and play video games. I really really really like the Magnus archives. My favorite word is basil (please help I'm so sorry I'm always bad at talking about myself 😭)

Vulture culture asks

First piece?

Last piece?

Favorite piece?

Least favorite piece?

How many items in your collection?

Would you consider buying something for your collection?

Most expensive?

Least expensive?

Dream skull?

Dream non skull bone?

Dream pelt?

Dream dry/wet preserve (including diaphonization)?

Dream other?

Prefer finding or buying?

Do you pick up road kill?

Do you ever hunt animals and then collect bones?

Water or burying?

Collect insects?

How long have you collected?

Does anyone around you think it’s gross/weird?

Is anyone around you interested in it like you are?

Weirdest thing you’ve found?

Ever bleached or boiled?

Smallest piece?

Biggest piece?

Do you tan?

Do you taxidermy?

Do you diaphonize?

What’s one thing you want to learn in vulture culture?

Do you or would ever consider selling vulture culture items (link your shop if you sell!!!)?

Would you buy a human bone?

What’s your favorite thing about vulture culture?

What’s your favorite animal type to work with? (Ex: mammals, birds, etc. OR cats, butterflies etc.)?

What’s the nastiest thing you’ve done while doing vulture culture?

Ever had a vulture culture accident?

Ever articulated a skeleton?

Do you like collecting things like shells or beehives?

What do you have in the cleaning process right now?

Would you keep your own pets pelt/bones?

Do you think collection laws are reasonable or not?

How much time do you spend doing vulture culture?

Do you have a vulture culture display case or display room?

What are your 3 favorite vulture culture blogs?

Collect antlers?

Do you make any vulture culture related art or art out of vulture culture things?

Did someone else get you into vulture culture?

Do you have to hide your vulture culture from anyone?

Does vulture culture tie into any of your religious beliefs (you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to)?

Why vulture culture?

Introduce yourself to the vc community and say a few things about yourself!!!

[tetrisfinished]

homework

on monday i had my appointment with my therapist.

i think this is not new news here - i'm pretty sure i've mentioned that i am seeking professional help in order to straighten out my life, my brain, how i deal with my life, etc.

if i haven't...well there it is.

anyway. she gave me some homework - she asked me to write down all the things that i can that would make my life "ideal".

so i thought i would do that. here. i guess i want to put it here almost as an archive benchmark of the place i'm in now and what i consider to be my ideal place and HOPEFULLY someday look back on it and think wow i've gotten it!

or alternatively someday look back on it and realize perhaps what i thought was my ideal would actually have been wrong or bad for me and....hindsight is of course, 20/20.

anyway so here it is: my ABSOLUTE ideal life would be....that i fall back in love with my husband. i fall back in love with him, i am able to respect him again, i am able to create a non-toxic home for my child who deserves to see his parents in a loving relationship.

that's my ideal.

in this ideal, i don't account for any changes that i want to see in yasir. it only accounts for me making a complete 180 and just developing the ability to let go of my anger and emotions and accept my sole responsibilities and maybe even be grateful for the morsels that yasir picks up and does along the way.

i guess, to be fair, this is only my ideal because i want to provide esa a home that's not broken or severed.

it's not my ideal because it actually is my ideal.

we'll call this "ideal" sabr.

my next ideal is....that both yasir and i change. god knows we both need to . i need to be able to let things go, take away my anger, regulate my emotions.

and yasir needs to understand his responsibilities, act like an adult, take part in the household, actively handle chores and work.

that's my ideal for me....i feel in my heart of hearts that now that is the only way that i will be able to open my heart to yasir. otherwise, we're just too far gone.

and oh, another part of this scenario would be that IDEALLY....i wouldn't have to teach yasir how to be an adult. because - if i've said it once, i'll say it a million times over - i am NOT his mother. i do not take or own the responsibility of raising this manchild. and if we're talking ideals anyway...well wouldn't that be just dandy that one day (with or without help) yasir wakes up and is a sensitive and caring and mature adult human being who willingly takes on domestic labour and parenting responsibilities and IS NOT a lazy fuck.

this ideal i think we'll call.....unattainable.

only because from yasir's words and his body language....he refuses to accept that he actually needs to change. and in his own perception he does more than enough of his part in our family unit.

obviously, i disagree.

my third ideal is...i guess i'll call it acceptance.

i accept that my relationship with yasir has more than expired.

i accept that yasir will not change and it will take only miraculous amounts of said change for me to even bat another eyelash at him.

i accept that i am parenting and working and own responsibility for 2 adults in my household.

and i MOVE THE FUCK ON. in this ideal, i explain to esa....that sometimes mamas and babas don't love each other anymore despite that they still love their esa's the ABSOLUTE FUCKING MOST. but for their own sanities and self respect....they have to separate.

and then we separate. and somehow i get to live and own my own home exclusively with my kid. i find a good babysitter. my kid is NEVER mad or upset with me for making this nasty tough decision. and the rest of the world just sort of....leaves me alone.

in this ideal...i would also LOVE it if every single person went out of their way to validate my decision to separate as well. and no one thought of me as villainous (despite that currently i do feel like i am being perceived as villain bahu in my susraal).

and we go on living. and perhaps in this ideal, i lose a shit ton of the weight i gained and it turns out it was the weight of the stress and the world and the overwhelm that i was carrying that's to my dysfuctional past life and shitty marriage.

and then i become beautiful and someone else beautiful (INSIDE ESPECIALLY) comes into my life and i am able to once again accept a man as my husband and this time....i start off better. but he also treats me right.

those are my scenarios.

i only named one of them unattainable but if i really critically look at them...they're all fucking unattainable.

i'm so done with marriage. and especially my own.

much love,

k

[theatrescribbles]

Letters from Heaven, Chapter 2

31st October 1991

Dear Harry,

Dad here, I’ve decided to take over this time. Partly because Mum wrote the last one (hey, it wouldn’t it be fair if she did it again now!) but also because she is still recovering from the shock of seeing you and your friends take on a fully-grown mountain troll in your first year – and live!

Not even injured! We have a feeling you MAY have inherited my careless streak and trouble finding you a lot, but please take it from me that being brave does not mean that you go LOOKING for trouble. There’s a difference ok.

We are both very happy that you have sorted into Gryffindor. You probably know by now, but it was our house as well. I’d have been very surprised if you were in Slytherin – I’m sure you’d still be a brilliant student, it’s just that house does NOT deserve to have my son in it. Not when it was the house which had, not all, but a lot of Voldemort’s followers in it.

We’re really happy you’ve been able to make friends like Ron and Hermione. I tell you what, Hermione reminds me a lot of your mother at the same age. She was, sorry, IS very bright and when we first met (and at least for the following 5 years) she... err... didn't like me very much! I know you and Ron didn’t see eye to eye with Hermione at first, but I get the feeling that the three of you will be friends for life. It was the same for me, with the other boys from my house; they regularly babysat for you when you were a baby. I hope you will see them again.

Being at Hogwarts, there are always going to be rivalries, and your Mum and I should have guessed it would be the Malfoy boy. His father was actually a prefect when your mother and I were at school. He wasn't nice. Just, don’t do what I did when my rival was around (which was go off the handle), and try and keep a level head.

This also is the case for your Potion’s master. I know the fact he had it in for you before you even started for no reason is absolutely not fair, but you need to keep your cool around him. If it gets really bad, please talk to Professor McGonagall. Leave the pranking to Ron’s brothers. They seem to know what they are doing.

We’re both so proud of you already, and you’ve only had 2 months at Hogwarts, even though we may be a little cross with you about the troll. But of course, you and Ron couldn’t have just left Hermione in the toilets like that. No true Gryffindor would have done that.

Oh, and I can’t believe I almost forgot Harry – I am UNBELIEVEABLY PROUD that you got on the Gryffindor Quidditch team in YOUR FIRST YEAR!!! My son is the youngest seeker in a century!! I was on the team for 6 years, originally Seeker, but then switched to Chaser. You’ll love Quidditch, Harry. I always knew that you’ll be a player someday – when you were little, you had a toy broomstick and you just couldn’t leave it alone! Your mother and I will be watching all your matches! Good luck!

Much love,

Dad (and Mum)

Read on A03

[lauransoverthinking]

The other side of this scene

First Vader dies. Then Anakin dies.

Then Anakin learns how to bring himself back, and suddenly he has time. Time to apologize to Obi-wan. Time to get to know Luke and watch him do amazing things. His son is so amazing. His daughter is amazing too, but she doesn’t want a relationship (he hopes she will someday) so he respects that and doesn’t bother her.

This is honestly, the happiest he has ever been.

There are more ghosts than he expected. More relationships to mend. Apologies to make. Qui-gon has been very busy teaching everyone he was able to find, before they passed on.

He looks for her amongst the beings in their astral plane. But he cannot find her.

Qui-gon says there were too many lost the night Anakin marched on the temple. There were too many to find them all. He lays a hand on Anakin’s shoulder and says he is sorry, he never saw her.

From behind him, Anakin senses despair from Obi-wan.

But Anakin knows something they don’t.

“Masters,” The words catch in his throat. There are many crimes he committed. But this one. To have killed his own sister. They obviously know he is capable of such atrocities, he killed Obi-wan after all. But this will be different. He just knows it will be. “Ahsoka didn’t die that night. Vader. No. I killed her. Seven years ago. In a Sith temple.”

-

Obi-wan’s world spins. Which is an odd feeling when one’s world is just, the force.

Ahsoka had survived. Ahsoka had lived. Ahsoka had fought.

Anakin had killed Ahsoka.

Qui-gon looks down and shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I never saw her. I was not able to teach her.”

Ahsoka is gone.

He had always known it. He thought she died when she was 18. Killed by men she loved. He supposes that part is still true. She was killed by a man she loved. Was it always her destiny to be killed by a chosen brother? She survived the first time, so destiny tried again?

He had always known he would never see her again, but now he knows he could have. Knows Ben Kenobi could have seen her. Could have wrapped his arms around her.

This is… it is too much pain.

-

The masters all spend time with Luke. Guiding him. Helping him.

Once or twice, there is the whisper of a force presence in the periphery. They brush it off. It must be an echo of some kind. They feel no one here but Luke and his wards.

Once or twice, Luke mentions a story he shouldn’t know. Master Yoda playing with children in the room of a thousand fountains. The incomprehensible size and simple beauty of the archives at the temple.

The masters brush this off. Stories, passed along over time, by friends of the Jedi.

-

Time passes. The Jedi are lost again. The dark rises again. The dark falls again.

-

It comes on slowly. It isn’t a sudden supernova. It is as gradual as a sunrise. A light in the force, unshielding itself.

Obi-wan feels it too, but like Anakin, has absolutely no idea where it is coming from.

It is Luke who provides the answer. He smiles to himself as he says “Ahsoka always did have the most impressive shields. I wonder why she is finally lowering them.”

Questions about how Luke could possibly know this will wait (although there are many, many questions). She is alive. They can finally find her.

-

When Anakin and Obi-wan arrive, the reason for the drop in her shields is obvious. Their padawan is becoming one with the force.

She feels so tired. Their padawan has fought for too long and Obi-wan’s heart breaks for her. He got information about Fulcrum from everyone he found who knew anything. He knows he has only scratched the surface of what she has spent her life doing, but he knows he is so so proud of her. He is not surprised that such a life has exhausted her, but it breaks his heart just the same.

Distantly, he wonders is ghosts can cry. It’s not a question he has had to ask himself before, but he thinks this may be the thing that does it.

They ask her to come with them. Learn from them.

They sense her fear and at first assume it is fear of change. Her life is ending after all. It is understandable to be afraid of this change.

But then it becomes clearer. She is afraid of coming with them.

Anakin understands. He did try to kill her. He is the reason her life was as hard as it was (not that the life of a Jedi was ever easy, but what she has gone through… it’s so much worse). He knows she cannot trust him. He just hopes she can trust Obi-wan.

Obi-wan understands. He remembers her fear in the chamber of judgement. Her guardedness when the council asked her back. Her barbs the last time they saw one another. He knows she cannot trust him. He just hopes she can trust Anakin.

-

They are both wrong. She has always trusted them both. Trusts them to guide her and protect her as well as they can. It’s just that, trusting anything is so hard for her now.

She is afraid to hope. She is afraid to undertake this task and fail. Afraid to get close to having them back and have it ripped away.

Suddenly her nebulous status as a Jedi/not a Jedi seems to matter so much more than it has in decades.

-

They both feel it when she makes her decision.

They feel her fill the bonds that have slowly reawakened with all of her love and all of her trust.

They feel the determination that this will be something she gets to have.

Finally they hear her.

“I’m ready masters. Teach me.”

[prismaticpichu]

Please, please, please, PLEASE go check out this absolute treasure of a fanfic if you haven’t already!!!!! <333 I am not kidding when I say it’s one of the most beautiful pieces of writing I’ve ever read- period- fanfiction or not. Altocat is absolutely gifted with her masterful prose, wield of emotions, and the sheer amount of POWER that the scenes convey. There isn’t a single piece of writing of theirs that hasn’t left me utterly speechless. One of my genuine inspirations, and someone whom I respect and look up to like no one else. I don’t think I would even love Seph as much as I do without this fic- really!!! Her grasp on every character in the sphere of the FF7 world is deep and rich and this fic here humanizes Seph like none other I’ve seen!! It truly is the inner workings of a monster- step by step, brick by brick, thread by thread. From the moment he’s ripped from Lucrecia’s womb to the moment he falls into that Mako reactor, we see it all. We see the kind of person he is. We see the kind person he is, and we see the people around him and his mental state deteriorate. Even if you’re kinda ehhhhh on fanfic as a whole, I implore you to give this one a shot on the basis of its writing alone. The foreshadowing, the drama, the pathos, the dialogue, the vivid and godly prose that I can only hope to even slightly strive towards someday- it’s all there. And it’s absolutely gorgeous. This fic means a whole lot to me- one of my favorites of all time, and the first fic I ever even bookmarked! I love it to death and I hope you do too!!!!

So plz. Friendos. Go join that kudos count!!! Keep showing this godly author the love that she deserves!!! <3333

Don’t know where to find it? Don’t worry! Got ya covered, fam! <3

Enjoy the ride!!!!! ❤️

Bruh AMT just got like...eight different kudos in the last hour. Did someone post about it somewhere? It's super bizarre.

[vetinarivimesy]

Hey, friendo, got any traisnpotting meta?

Oh can of worms there! Uh... I'm really not sure I've got anything intelligent to say about this masterpiece. Beware the likely long incoherent babbling of random factoids you probably already know, that I find interesting rather than anything resembling actual witty analysis!

So between the author Irvine Welsh's deliberately unflinching prose, and John Hodge, the screenwriter's, Literally A Doctor status the intimate knowledge of the realities of drug addiction and how to game the NHS and the utterly black gallows humour shared by doctors and Scots living next to the great big nuclear target that is trident... Well the humour is pitch black yet somehow hilarious.

I adore how they managed to capture the essence of the fact that Irvine Welsh used Scots/phonetic spellings of slang terms in a rare instance of othering the RP/'proper' English rather than the other way around.

I miss the duo that is a John Hodge script paired with Boyle's directorial style! I feel like Boyle's particular eye for framing a shot paired with that pitch black humour was a perfect combination.

I really wish I could work out where that infamous Newsnight episode mentioned on the Ewan McGregor TFI Friday 1996 interview was archived. The one where Jeremy Paxman shuts down the BBCs usual attempts to 'show both sides of a debate', in this case a planned segment about Trainspotting 'glorifying' drug use the week the film was due out (in 1996, in then still-Tory, not yet New Labour, Britain for some context). Apparently he just flat out stated, 'Well, I've watched the film, and it doesn't.' probably completely ruining the scheduling of the show. It sounds glorious.

I find it kinda hilarious/incredible, how, despite Trainspotting being regarded by many as one of the quintessential Britpop films... It doesn't include any tracks by one of the quintessential Britpop bands. Pulp are represented by Mile End playing over the prolonged sequence of Begbie annoying Renton in London, Blur get Sing and Closet Romantic... Oasis? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Nil points.

Why?

Because the Gallaghers thought it was genuinely a film about, well, the anorak hobby, trainspotting. The at the time self-proclaimed biggest band in the world missed out on featuring in a film that they then praised to the rooftops and back, and attended the premier festival-screening of, because they didn't bother to properly read the letter!

(Even more amusingly ironic given that McGregor's a bit of a fanboy of theirs, as evidenced by him singing that song and wearing that hair in A LIfe Less Ordinary.)

I also love how weirdly incestuous the Lou Reed-Iggy Pop-Bowie-Trainspotting link is. They only got the rights to use Perfect Day (a Bowie produced Lou Reed track from the album Transformer) because Bowie had watched and enjoyed the at-the-time obscure debut film from the newbie directing producing team that Danny Boyle put together for Shallow Grave. Without Bowie's say-so that Lou Reed track would have been wildly beyond their measely £1.5million budget.

Lust for Life (the eponymous single from the 1977 album from Bowie and Iggy’s ill-targeted attempt after being ‘very naughty boys’ to get clean... by going to live in Berlin... the then smack capital of Europe...) only got it’s eventual official music video in the 90s... And is mostly Trainspotting clips despite the song predating the film by a good two decades!

Which later comes almost full-circle when Ewan McGregor gets cast as 'absolutely not an Iggy-Pop/Lou Reed RPF OC please don't sue us' Curt Wild, opposite the absolutely not-Bowie character in the film that makes Bowie the villain of his own lifestory Velvet Goldmine.

I really need to sit down and rewatch The Pillow Book someday with an eye for the dramatic weightloss McGregor was undergoing as Trainspotting prepwork.

I simultaneously really hope Robert Carlyle gets the chance to make the Blade Artist, and look upon that project with fearful dread, given that Trainspotting was like bottled lightning. But Robert Carlyle is one of those actors who makes any project he's involved in instantly 527% better than it would have been without him, so I'd watch it regardless! The sheer amount of analysis of the Begbie character Carlyle's clearly put in really shows a level of care that I hope he gets to showcase.

I do wonder how Trainspotting watches in the alternative universe where Ewen Bremner got the chance to reprise his role as Mark Renton from the stageplay. Terribly, I can't imagine anyone else playing Spud Murphy anywhere near as well as he does... But he was OG Renton, and the stage version won all of the awards back in the day so he must have been terrific in the role.

Jonny Lee Miller's accent work being so convincing that Ewen Bremner had no idea he was English until the wrap party will forever remain an amusing anecdote. Not to mention the utter weirdness that must have been Angelina Jolie just casually hanging around on-set!

Watching the rest of Danny Boyle's filmography with hindsight knowledge about the Great Falling Out between him and McGregor over what went down surrounding Hollywood money ruining the behind the scenes on The Beach gets more than a little bit weird. Quite aside from sitting through The Beach wondering about what might have been (Tilda Swinton opposite McGregor in combative rival roles?! Dammit...), there's also the other films from the era they weren't talking to each other. I adore Cillian Murphy's performances in the two Boyle films he's involved with, I think he's one of the key parts that make Sunshine work, he's an utterly fantastic actor. And I sat through 28 Days Later when I was arguably far too young for it, and therefore terrified of RL zombies for years afterwards on the basis that he was in it... However, nowadays I can't help but watch 28 Days Later with half my brain going, huh I can almost picture how McGregor might have played this in another universe.

Watching Trance, with self-described "I'm cheaper than Ewan McGregor" (though I suspect that's no longer true) James McAvoy in the lead role also hits thoroughly strangely. Although I think Trance comes after they'd made steps to repair their relationship.

And some mildly cursed information, that no one will thank me for pointing out. One of the few things I feel that gives away Trainspotting's tiny shoestring budget is an annoying image issue. In both the otherwise gorgeous Renton-desperately-searching-for-a-loo shot outside that very grey but very brightly curtained block of flats, and the Spud-fucks-up-a-job-interview-good-and-proper scene, the image is subtly and unpleasantly vibrating. This occurs on and off during quite a few other moments in the film too, I'm guessing one of their cameras was somewhat worse for wear. I wish I'd never noticed it, becuase I cannot unnotice it!

[dragon-in-a-mug]

Up In The Tree

Fandom: Natsume's Book Of Friends

Warnings: None

Word Count: 3.110

Summary:

Natori's voice brought him back to the present. "You alright there, Natsume?" The look the exorcist was giving him was warm and a tad concerned. Natsume gave him a small, but earnest smile. "I'm fine, Natori-san. Just a bit nervous." This was the truth. He had no idea why the head of the Matoba Clan invited him here, but he was sure that the man was up to no good. 

Or: Natsume gets invited to an exorcist meeting. He is not too happy about it, but at least the view is great.

Notes:

This was inspired by this one shot :

So if you like my fic than please also check out their work. I absolutely loved the idea behind it.

Natsume already regretted coming here. Here being another exorcist meeting. He hadn't really enjoyed the meetings he had been a part of so far, mainly because he'd always ended up getting caught in some kind of trouble. Still he kept showing up when he was invited, in the hopes of maybe, someday, finding a kindred soul. This time the invitation came from Matoba Seiji, Natsume's least favorite exorcist of the bunch. The man was unscrupulous and cold, having no regard for neither humans nor youkai. In that aspect he was the polar opposite of Natsume Takashi, who had a heart too big and bright, that couldn't ignore someone in need, no matter if it hurt him in the process.

To be honest, he only showed up because Natori promised he would tag along. He had asked the man for his help, despite worrying about burdening him. Of course he had agreed, not wanting the boy to run into any problems, as he tended to do in his good old Natsume fashion.

Natsume was incredibly thankful for the presence beside him, especially when he was missing the weight of his chubby bodyguard in his arms. Nyanko-Sensei thought it would be best if he kept to the shadows and didn't show his furry face until he was needed. Natsume could understand the reasoning, of course he did, with this being a huge gathering and himself wanting to stay under the radar, but that didn't make him miss the safety that the grumpy cat provided any less.

Natori's voice brought him back to the present. "You alright there, Natsume?" The look the exorcist was giving him was warm and a tad concerned. Natsume gave him a small, but earnest smile. "I'm fine, Natori-san. Just a bit nervous." This was the truth. He had no idea why the head of the Matoba Clan invited him this time, but he was sure that the man had some kind of mind game planned out for him, probably to try to convert him to become a member of his clan again. That was not going to happen though. Natsume may not be the best judge of character, but even he could see that Matoba Seiji was bad news. If push came to shove, he still had Natori and Madara, who seemed fiercely protective of him from time to time, contradicting the cool and unapproachable facade they liked to showcase. They were huge softies on the inside and Natsume knew that better than anyone else.

Natori put a light hand on his shoulder. "That's okay. It's probably for the best if you stay alert around some of these exorcists. Especially Matoba. But don't worry, I won't leave your side tonight." That promise actually made Natsume feel a little better. "Thank you, Natori-san. Matoba-san can be unpredictable. I'm glad you're here, although I'm sorry for dragging you into my problems again." But Natori immediately waved him off. "Don't worry about it, Natsume. You're never troubling me." It was still hard for Natsume to not see himself as a burden and he appreciated the reassurance from the other. Natori gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze before he let go.

They made their way slowly across a stone path. On each of their sides was foliage, but it expanded into a deep, quiet forest to their right, while they could catch glimpses of water and the sound of small waves rolling onto the shore to their left. In front of them a big mansion came into view. The windows were all alight, soft chatter reaching their ears as they got closer. Natsume was amazed by the size of the house. It wasn't as big as some he had visited before, but it was still impressive. The entire building was buzzing with life. Through the windows he caught glimpses of many exorcists. He knew that a lot of people attended these gatherings, but there were probably more exorcists than he had ever seen before, all of them accompanied by their shikis. In contrast to the almost empty forest this liveliness was staggering. It reminded the boy of a busy anthill. That thought brought an amused smile to his face, but it didn't last long as his gaze landed on the form of one Matoba Seiji, standing in the middle of the pathway.

The two newcomers stepped out of a bamboo grove into the open as Matoba made his way towards them. The man was always smiling, but it could have kept ice caps from melting. It was sickly-sweet and just so fake even Natsume cringed when he saw it. He waved at them. "Ah, Natsume-kun, I'm so glad you came. And you brought Shuuichi-san with you. How nice. I don't see your cat though. I hope he is not neglecting his job again? We wouldn't want something to happen to you, do we now?", he asked, false concern laced into his voice. He was still a few meters away, but the gap between them was closing fast. Natsume just hoped the evening would pass by without a hitch and as fast as possible. Matoba really gave him the chills. Of course he didn't want to tell him that Nyanko-Sensei was close by, keeping himself hidden so he could swoop in and get Natsume out of every tight spot he might get himself into. Instead he changed the topic.

"Why did you invite me here, Matoba-san?" Natori had positioned himself slightly in front of Natsume, ready to step between him and anything that may try to get to him. Matoba chuckled in his usual foreboding way. "My, my, I would almost assume you think I had some ulterior motives when I asked you to come here. Don't you worry, Natsume-kun. I simply thought this would be a great experience for you", he said placatorily. Natsume gave him his best glare, but didn't say anything. Natori spoke up beside him. "Then why don't you lead the way? The meeting is inside after all. No need to stand outside and waste time." He gave the head of the Matoba Clan a polite, but cool smile, raising an eyebrow challengingly. The other man didn't look bothered in the slightest, probably already drawing conclusions about his missing bodyguard on his own. He wordlessly turned around and lazely waved his hand to signal them to follow him.

Natsume and Natori walked a few steps behind Matoba and the little procession made its way towards the mansion. It was surrounded by water, only accessible through a bridge that slithered its way over the small lake. They were almost at the house, when Matoba suddenly stopped.

"What color does that kimono have, Natsume-kun?" He turned his head slightly to gaze at Natsume. The other two came to a halt as well. "Kimono?", repeated Natsume confused. He sent a questioning look towards Natori, but the man was slightly glaring at Matoba, which the other didn't even bother to return, his eyes still solely trained on Natsume. They both knew what was going on and he had no idea what this whole ordeal was about.

Natori seemed to take pity on the poor confused boy because he gave up on his one-sided staring match with Matoba, turned in his direction instead and pointed at something behind Natsume's back. He turned around and followed Natori's extended finger until he saw the object of discussion. Then his breath froze in his lungs.

With wide eyes he stared at the thing up in a gnarled old tree. It was so beautiful he forgot how to breathe for a moment. "So, what color is the kimono?", Matoba asked again, now standing right next to him. Natsume flinched, the presence of the others having temporarily slipped his mind and the sudden proximity not helping his nerves at all. He furrowed his brows at the question, but when Natori laid a reassuring hand on his back and took position on his other side, he relaxed slightly.

He studied the fabric closely, which was being illuminated only by the moon and stars above, the lights from the mansion not reaching it. Despite his little knowledge regarding the topics of textiles and clothes, even Natsume knew that this kimono was special. And in spite of the darkness he could make out all the details perfectly fine.

The fabric was likely handmade silk. Its color was the most radiant crimson he had ever seen. Whenever they read poems about the war in school he could never quite picture what red flowers blooming on a blood drenched battlefield were supposed to look like. He thought he had an understanding of it now.

Blossoms made out of golden yarn winded their way across the expensive cloth. Petals of gorgeous chrysanthemums and lovely peonies were stitched carefully onto the garment, one wouldn't be able to find similar flowers in any earthly garden.

How was he supposed to describe this magnificent kimono with mere words? And even more so, why? Why did Matoba ask him in the first place? Both he and Natori clearly knew what it looked like. So why?

Natsume finally peeled his eyes off of the kimono and turned to either men at his sides. Both of them looked expectantly at him, so he told them what he saw. "It's red." Natsume cringed internally at how mundane it sounded, not worthy of the thing in the tree. He tried again. "It is a dark crimson color. It's lovely." Natori patted his back. "Very good, Natsume." Natsume looked confused at him. Good? What was good? What was going on? From his other side Matoba asked, "Do you see any patterns?" Turning towards him, Natsume slowly nodded. "Flowers. There are golden peonies and chrysanthemums," he answered, hoping someone would explain to him what this was about. Apparently not because the only thing he got in response from Matoba was "Like I thought."

Having enough from the exorcists' cryptic behavior, he decided to just ask. "What are you talking about? Why are you asking me this?"

Again it was Natori, who took him out of his misery. "That kimono looks different for everyone. Depending on the spiritual level of someone it has different colors. For people with low spiritual power it looks white. The more powerful ones see it in different shades of red. For me it is crimson,which is pretty good, if I may say so myself. But people who can see any pattern at all, let alone both chrysanthemums and peonies, are really spiritual. Not many are that capable," explained he. A magical kimono. Natsume couldn't say it was his first one, but this was definitely the best one so far. "In fact, I'm currently the only exorcist that is able to see the whole flower pattern," said Matoba, casually flaunting his superiority. But now it turned out that Natsume could see the same things as Matoba. He hummed pensively as he turned back towards the tree. Was Matoba, too, breathless when he first laid his eyes on the beautiful robe? On one hand it was kind of hard for him to imagine, but on the other hand, he couldn't think of any other possible reaction one could have for such a masterpiece.

"So, not everyone gets to see it like this? That is tragic!" Natsume's heart bled just from the thought of it. Either everybody should be able to appreciate its beauty or no one. "Well, yeah, but there is no need to feel sad about it. It is what it is. The people who only see a white piece of fabric don't know what exactly they are missing, so they won't feel bad about it," Natori tried to give him some kind of reassurance.

But Natsume knew better than most other people that you can yearn for things you never had. Still, Natori was right. If he dwelled on that thought for too long, it would only bring him grief. So he turned away from the tiny island in the lake that hosted the tree with its precious treasure and the three continued their way towards the mansion.

Natsume was deep in thought until Natori gently nudged his side. He smiled warmly down at the boy. "Penny for your thoughts?" Natsume returned the smile. A small thing that seemed to hold the light of an early summer morning in it. "I was just thinking about the kimono." Natori nodded, encouraging him to continue. "It's just so pretty, it's a shame so few can see it. Though it is kind of hard to make out due to the distance and because of all the hair," told Natsume the man.

And then both Natori and Matoba came to a screeching halt. They whipped around to face him.

"Hair?", asked Natori, looking at him as if he'd grown a second head. "Hmmm yeah… the long hair shields quite a bit of the kimono, don't you think?"

Hair… that didn't fit though. It irked him the wrong way. It was simply too plain to just call it hair. It was way too beautiful, far too precious for that. The way it was flowing down the back of the kimono like liquid moonlight, every strand glowing in a cold, but gentle light. They were so delicate, that every time a soft breeze passed by they billowed up, lapping at the sky not unlike a rushing stream making its way down the mountains towards a valley. The kimono may have been gorgeous, but the being on the tree was ethereal.

The person who the silver locks and the red kimono belonged to was a youkai. There was not a single doubt in Natsume's mind. No human being could possess such an inconceivable beauty. Their long legs dangled with a grace from the place the person was seated on, that it would make gazelles green with envy. Thin arms gleamed like bone china and fragile fingers rested in their lap. They looked like a zephyr-like wind could blow them away, yet they radiated a confident air, strong and constant. Natsume was sure, nothing could get them out of that tree if they didn't want it. They had sat there for a long time and they would continue to be here for a time frame that a simple human couldn't wish to comprehend.

Natsume had seen his fair share of gods, all powerful and unbelievably handsome, but never something like this. The way they held themselves, their timeless nature, it was something unique and felt almost forbidden to look at. Everything seemed to gravitate around this being with such an effortless ease. He was so close to them, yet they felt unreachable. Despite looking like the moon sat foot on earth, the being had an aura to it that told him that it could do so much more, than just change the tides. Natsume wouldn't have been surprised if someone told him that this tree was the middle of the universe. If he were a gambler, he would have even bet on it.

His eyes had wandered back to the celestial body perched on the ancient tree. He admired the figure with an ache in his chest he could not hope to put into words.

And then they turned their head. It was a small movement, just enough so that they could look at Natsume. His heart stuttered in its place only to start beating faster. He now could see a part of their face.

Their pale skin stood out stark against the dark background. They possessed a face so lovely, that they must have been at least an angel. Long white eyelashes adorned the eye that was now focused on Natsume. Its observant look made his knees weak and he felt like falling to the floor and yet he could not avert his gaze or even move an inch for the life of him. An eye of the color of a dying star, burning with the intensity of a thousand suns, stared right through him, no doubt gazing into the farthest corners of his soul, uncovering his whole essence in the blink of an eye. He felt stripped bare under their scrutinizing gaze, every secret and his deepest desires laid out before him for the holy being to judge.

Then their lips quirked up into an unfathomable smile and he felt like, if he would die right now, right here, he would die happy and blessed.

This eye contact only lasted for a moment, but to Natsume it felt like an eternity. When the being turned back around a wave of emptiness washed over him, but the feeling was gone as soon as it had started. Instead something light and precious made its home in his heart. Air rushed back into his lungs and Natsume hadn't even realized he had held his breath. He looked back to the exorcists that were watching him in unbelieving fascination. At that moment he realized that they couldn't see it, hadn't witnessed what had just happened. He had grown accustomed to the fact that those people could see the same things as him. They may not perceive everything as he does, having a rather dark view on youkai and the likes, where he saw kindred hearts full of longing and love, but now being able to see something that they couldn't? Especially something as wonderful as this? It made something in his stomach twist.

He looked at them with saucer-big eyes, not sure what he should do or say now. In the end he didn't have to say anything, as Natori slipped back into his role as the unofficial older brother. "You are really amazing, Natsume," he said in awe and with a bright smile, nothing like his sparkling actor ones. There was an understanding look in his eyes and Natsume just knew he didn't have to hide, didn't have to feel bad for something like this. If he didn't know better, he would say Natori looked proud, but that couldn't be right. Then the man put his hand on Natsume's shoulder, warm and strong and oh so safe and gently pushed him towards the mansion.

"Let us head inside. That cat of yours would kill me if you'd catch a cold out here." Natsume nodded in agreement and they resumed their path towards the house.

Matoba had a thoughtful look on his face and Natsume was sure he had to deal with that at some point, but for now he had to deal with this exorcist meeting.

And so they finally headed in, joining the other exorcists and their shikis.