#somebody please look up 'fourth person' on google

[smzeszikorova-reblogs-stuff]

"Chat is a fourth person pronoun—" NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! It's a COLLECTIVE NOUN, DAMMIT!

[chartedrights]

black friday,,,,, gold rush au,,,,,,,,,,

Oh my god okay first of all? Your mind

Second of all- worth mentioning on this post-independence day that the California Gold Rush was in fact the impetus for the California Genocide and the displacement of the indigenous Californian population. They didn’t teach us that in fourth grade, but I figured I’d tell you. California has a long and terrible history regarding its treatment of the indigenous people who lived here before us, and I’d recommend googling California Genocide or the Spanish Mission System if you want some increased awareness there.

Frank Pricely stole so much fucking land. He probably started out owning about half of the area and has slowly been selling off plots to people looking for gold. He knows it’s a lost cause looking for gold himself, but who is he to deny people their wishes? He gets their money either way. Doesn’t matter what happens to them afterwards. He scams so many people out of their money by telling them that their patch of land is the best, the finest, the one with the most gold.

Lex and Hannah and Ethan came out from Hatchetfield, running away from home in hopes of striking it rich in the gold fields. The story begins with them making it to California, after a long journey from the other side of the country

Think Trail to Oregon but much less fun

They truly are CaliforMIA this time

Lex has been scoping out Frank’s land for a few days now, secretly, playing the system by checking until she finds a particular patch of land with gold in the water… and buys it from Frank immediately, doing her best not to give away why she wants it.

Linda came out from New York with her husband and her four beautiful blonde boys several years ago, back when it wasn’t even US territory, because Gerald’s debts were hounding them. Linda runs a boarding house for those looking for gold while Gerald searches, fruitlessly, for gold himself. Though their debtors lost track of them somewhere around the Sierras, he’s still afraid. Linda’s just glad he’s not near her all the time.

And then Frank Pricely strikes gold under his own house, on the one plot of land he won’t sell, and everyone starts to wonder. He won’t tell, but people whisper that a man in denim left his house the night before, walked out into the dark and disappeared.

Every man in denim is hounded, begged, for their luck, for their blessing, please sir, please, I have a family, I have debts, I have a girl back home-

But it was no ordinary man Frank made a deal with.

Wiley is a thing that looks like a man until the lantern light hits him just right and his eyes shine like a deer’s, until the moonlight hits his profile just right and his face looks *too* perfect to be human, until he smiles and his teeth are just a little too sharp and a little too shiny. But he’ll grant your wish, alright. He’ll make your dreams come true. You’ll have years aplenty to enjoy your good fortune, your riches and your health and your family. But he’ll be back, when your time is up, and he’ll be smiling then, too, with sharp and shining teeth.

Wiley comes to people and whispers secrets in their ears, invites them to makes deals with him, meets people lingering at the crossroads and leads them down a dark and winding path. He is not a man, and he is not a spirit, and he is not kind.

Linda makes a deal with him, and in return he organizes circumstances so that the 49ers begin to worship her- everyone who does right by her has better luck, does better at cards, eats better, sleeps better, has better luck with the ladies- people notice. It’s a joke, just casually at first, cracks about her being their patron saint, about her being unrealistically beautiful, about how god blessed Miss Linda Monroe (and it’s always Miss, never Misses), and then more and more and more until the whole town seems to be in her grip.

Tom came out to California a year ago, just after Jane died. Tim is back in Hatchetfield with Emma, (who is doing her best to keep him alive as the Apotheosis occurs), and Tom has been looking for gold and catharsis out in the hills. He hasn’t found much, but maybe one day, he tells himself. Maybe one day. Soon. And then Tim can come out to be with him.

Becky has just come West, hoping to help keep the diseases in miners’ camps and towns like these to a minimum, helping anyone she can. Anyone who’ll let her, which sadly isn’t very many people. She’s running, from her husband or his ghost, who can say, but she is most certainly running.

Becky is the first person in three years to challenge Linda’s cult-like rule, and it stirs tensions. Eventually everything comes to a head, and riots begin to break out- some people blame Frank for their misfortune and the lack of gold on their land. He flees the town, leaving Linda the sole “authority” figure.

John makes his way into town like any other ‘49er, and the only reason he and Lex even meet is because she’s come to get her first gold harvest authenticated in town. He admits that he’s come out looking for the man who killed his mentor, that he knows he’s out in the hills somewhere.

Lex wishes him luck, and he hands her a scrap of paper with his name and PEIP’s address. She doesn’t think much of it.

The gold is real, of course, and word soon spreads that somebody is getting all the good luck, that somebody is cheating everyone else of the gold, that somebody is stealing it-

That night, at something which resembles a cult meeting but which is billed as a “party”, Linda points out Lex and Ethan specifically as the people in possession of the lucky land, and later that same night Ethan is murdered by some cultists in pursuit of the deed- for themselves, for Linda, as if the distinction matters.

Hannah has it, though, not Ethan, and she runs deep into the sparse woods, hoping to find Lex.

Tom and Becky take shelter in a half-finished theater, long-deserted. They watch the stars and listen to the screams, the breaking glass, the destruction raging outside. They find solace in each other, something they’d thought they would never have again.

Becky resolves to go out and take care of the wounded, and Tom agrees to help her.

Wilbur finds John first, though. John is notably shaken by the revelation that Wiley didn’t just take Wilbur’s soul, he didn’t just take his life- he stole his face as well. “A handsome face, isn’t it?” Wiley says, admiring it in the reflection off John’s revolver. “Immensely pleasing to the eye.” He catches John’s gaze, and it becomes clear that whatever John was, whoever he is, Wiley is stronger.

John dies. It is horrible. It is loud. Hannah hears it from miles away.

Lex is found by Sherman, who overpowers her. He forces her to call for Hannah, to help him look for her on the plot of land belonging to her and Ethan, but Lex tries to break free.

Wiley is the first person Tom and Becky find, and when they roll his (apparently) broken body onto its back, he grins up at Tom, who freezes. He simply stops, and even as Becky is knocked out and dragged away, Tom is mesmerized. He can’t look away. He can’t even think.

Caught by a few cultists who hadn’t attended the meeting, Hannah is walked into town, deed in hand, and brought to Linda.

There is another struggle, on the banks of the only river where gold has been found. Sherman holds Lex’s head underwater. Her eyes are so wide, open in the stream, and she’s screaming and screaming under the water but nobody hears and she can taste the gold, the dirt, the blood-

And then she can see John, just standing there looking up at her, as if the river was so much deeper, offering his revolver to her. She reaches and reaches and her bloody fingers just brush against it and it’s dry in her hand when she pulls it from the water and levels it at Sherman. She breathes cold air and pulls the trigger.

Tom is about to make a deal with Wiley when she finds him, arm outstretched to shake on it. She begs him not to, tells him that Wiley can’t be trusted, that he’s evil- but Tom just looks at her with glazed-over eyes and says ���He can give me my Jane back.”

“She wouldn’t be your Jane,” Lex says, pleading, as Wiley just grins and grins and grins. “She’d be his Jane, and he could take her away again. She’s dead, Mr. Houston. Your wife is dead, and I’m sorry, but this isn’t the way to fix that. You have a son,” she begs. “Please- please, don’t abandon him.”

And Tom looks at the outstretched hand, offering gold and ghosts, and he turns away.

Tom picks up a rifle from one of the fallen cultists and Lex tucks away her revolver, and they fight their way to the Monroe hostel, where Linda is holding court with her cult. Becky is still unconscious, Hannah is in near-hysterics at the loss of the thing her sister and Ethan entrusted her with.

Lex steals back the deed to the land they bought from Frank, and holds it up, strikes a match off the railing and holds it up to the deed. “This is just a piece of fucking paper,” she yells. “It’s just fucking metal! It doesn’t matter!” Linda screams, making a mad rush for Lex just as the match touches the deed. She and Lex struggle for a moment, and the deed flutters, flaming, to the ground.

Awake now, Becky stumbles to her feet, watches people flee the building, sees the discarded rifle where it was knocked from Tom’s hands.

Becky takes the rifle, one shot loaded and no second chances, and she aims it with keen eyes at Linda, where Lex has her pinned to a stalemate. She thinks of the Hippocratic oath, thinks of the words “do no harm,” thinks of all the people who have died today. She shoots.

Linda falls, bleeding, from the balcony, and Wiley disappears into the wind as the camp burns, as the Monroe hostel burns, as the rivers shine with blood and golden fire.

The fire spreads. Lex and Hannah meet Tom and Becky downstairs, make their way outside. California weeps smoke, and the other campers refuse to leave their plots, die standing charred-black skeletons that grin out at the world from their useless, greedy posts.

Becky leans on Tom’s shoulder, his arm around her waist as they stumble home with the girls.

The rest of it can wait until the morning.

[gwoongi]

(abandoned) i don’t want it at all

jeon jeongguk / reader genre: sugar baby au, sugar-babies-scamming-the-same-daddy-au rating: mature themes words: 2.3k warnings: sugar babies a/n: i would have liked 2 finish this one and maybe i will one day but for now here is the incomplete first draft that makes me laugh still

His dorm for first year had been a prison-cell-box with a broken window and bunk beds, the stale smell of farts from his roommate who insisted on top-bunk and made his evenings and early mornings absolute hell- but hey, he’s getting a fancy degree at the end, so it’s worth it, right? Jeongguk’s not sure if it’s worth it anymore.

(1)

Jeongguk was broke.

It was his own fault - that’s the price you pay for enrolling in University, studying something he probably doesn’t actually need but loves. It’s all fine and dandy studying Music until he realises that famous musicians don’t become famous because they got a degree. Ask any musician how they made it big and they’ll reply with good luck and hard work, not some fancy degree that means nothing unless you’ve got the talent to be successful. Well shit, now it’s in perspective, Jeongguk’s spending all this money on a degree that’s probably not going to make a difference when the time comes.

Now he has a part-time job at a random pizza takeaway that makes no money because Dominoes opened up across the street a few weeks ago, and he’s barely making enough to buy him more than two packets of instant noodles at a time. His dorm for first year had been a prison-cell-box with a broken window and bunk beds, the stale smell of farts from his roommate who insisted on top-bunk and made his evenings and early mornings absolute hell- but hey, he’s getting a fancy degree at the end, so it’s worth it, right? Jeongguk’s not sure if it’s worth it anymore.

This evening, the library is fairly quiet. Across the stacks are small candles inside black lanterns, a Harry Potter-esque vibe filling the room as the clock rolls into ten. Jeongguk loves when the school year ends, because for the past week, it’s only been the sad and broke music kids doing exams, meaning the library is virtually empty now that everybody else has finished up. Jeongguk’s last exam was yesterday. Huffing out a sigh that turns one of the only other heads in the library in his direction, he stretches his arms up over his head and arches his head backwards.

“Where’re you going over summer?”

Yoongi is another sad and broke music student, a third-going-fourth year who met Jeongguk in the music society during Jeongguk’s first weekend at University. Leaning his chair back on two legs, he throws a paper ball into the air and catches it, not even looking at Jeongguk as he talks to him.

Jeongguk shrugs in reply, tapping his nails against his laptop. “Dunno. Home, I guess.”

“Any plans?” Yoongi asks. “Wanna go to Lollapalooza?”

“Can’t afford it,” Jeongguk sighs, as Yoongi forces out a, “me neither” in between a chortled laugh. “And I don’t know. Probably going to have to get another job.”

“Good,” replies Yoongi, yawning loudly. “You can’t keep working at that shithole. I’m your only friend, and even I go to Dominoes instead of where you work.” As an afterthought, he looks at Jeongguk with a small frown, “sorry.”

Shaking his head in reply, Jeongguk slumps in his chair and sighs once again. Yoongi’s just suddenly put it all into perspective for him; Yoongi’s his only friend, he works a job that barely puts a meal onto his plate, and it’s not going to get any easier. 

The ball in Yoongi’s hand begins to bounce again and Jeongguk glances over at the student librarian, who buries her head into the crook of her elbow and sleeps her way through her night-shift. It’s only Jeongguk, Yoongi and four others in the library right now; none of them are reading, none of them are doing anything particularly productive. Two students are tucked into an alcove pouring wine quite openly into small glasses with a board of chess unfolded out on the table, the others on computers, wishing the night away. Jeongguk just doesn’t want to go back to his dorm, to where his roommate and his loaded to the brim stomach of Chinese food and unhealthy diets is waiting for him.

“You planning on staying here all night again?” questions Yoongi. He probs his feet up onto the partitioner under the table, accidentally kicking Jeongguk’s ankle in the process. “Sorry,” he adds.

“Yep,” Jeongguk replies, popping the ‘p’. “I’d literally rather sleep on the boys changing room floors than go back to my dorm.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes. “That’s disgusting, don’t be dramatic.”

“I’m being deadass,” Jeongguk insists, his eyes blown wide. “Want to swap dorms for the night? Ten dollars and you’ll be dry heaving in the hallway before midnight.”

“I’ll pass. Either way, you know my apartment is always open for you,” Yoongi reminds him. “You’ve got a key. Come by once you’ve finished whatever it is you’re doing. My wifi’s out.”

Another sigh. Jeongguk’s not defeated his boredom yet, the twitch in his fingers to do something still there. If he goes to Yoongi’s apartment now, he’ll just annoy him with the need to do something energetic, and Jeongguk knows best that Yoongi values his quiet time on an evening.

“Okay. Well, I’ll stay here for a little bit, and come by when I’m done,” Jeongguk says, stifling a yawn that would otherwise expose the fact that he’s absolutely knackered. “I won’t make a sound.”

“You will, you always do, I just pretend not to notice because I love you.” Yoongi says I love you with a disgusted face, sticking his tongue out with a fake gag that Jeongguk knows just proves how much he cares. Yoongi’s good like that, the more subtle type of loving older brother that Jeongguk’s been deprived of all his life. “Don’t stay out too late.”

“Won’t.”

Yoongi picks himself up and irons the aches out of his shoulders. “Cool. Stay safe and smart, Guk.”

“I can’t do both,” he sighs sadly, and Yoongi collects his bag and affectionately throws the paper ball at Jeongguk’s head. It bounces off and lands near one of the bookshelves. Neither picks it up, and Yoongi leaves the library. It dawns on Jeongguk three minutes after Yoongi leaves him that he’s actually really fucking lonely. Add that to the big long list of things Jeongguk is this year: friendless, broke, sad and lonely. God, he needs a hobby.

He also needs money. Very badly. After opening his phone and banking app and realising that he’s so close to slipping into the red, Jeongguk refrains from spending what he has left on something fried and takeaway and opens Google. One click, a few types: How to make money fast. Google will know what to do.

Jeongguk scrolls. Take online surveys and get paid NOW! No. Review apps and earn money! Not enough phone memory to download an app to review it, he scrolls down. Lonely AND Horny? Get yourself a Sugar Daddy TODAY! Oh? He’s listening.

The blog that opens up as he clicks the link is somebody’s personal blog, the title in a gross and thick font that Jeongguk almost can’t read. They talk a while about why you shouldn’t become a sugar-baby, but Jeongguk remembers that one time Tana Mongeau did a storytime on how she had a Daddy and got a lot of money, and Jeongguk’s got assets. He’s smart, has abs on a good day, and his dick isn’t half bad looking. That’s what Yooa had said to him, anyway. Finally, there’s a hyperlink to Seeking Arrangements, and Jeongguk feels kind of overwhelmed.

At least once in their lives, everybody’s thought about being a Sugar Baby. Jeongguk definitely has, all the damn time when he’s sitting around at work doing nothing because they’re about as busy as one can expect for a pizza place with two stars and a rival Dominoes parallel from the front. He’s even read about experiences, where people meet their daddies or mommies on the streets or through apps- and there was even that one crazy story about somebody’s Principal becoming their sugar Daddy, or something, he can’t quite remember. Regardless, Jeongguk’s entertained this thought before.

He looks down at himself. If he really tried his best, he could be kind of good at it. Without sounding conceited, Jeongguk’s good looking. What lets him down at school is the fact that he always dresses lazily and ignores people, rejects requests to go out and then complains to Yoongi about not having friends who hang out with him. All he needs is to fix his appearance, upload his best photographs, and he could secure the bag quite easily.

Jeongguk fills in the boxes and makes an account. petkoo is what he decides to name himself, and he picks his best selfie off Instagram as an icon. He leans back, as if a look from far away will change the way it looks. It’ll do. Luckily for him, he’s into men and women, and it just so happens that American men are both the dumbest and easiest to please. Suddenly, he’s excited, his leg bouncing under the table until he hits his knee and stops. The student librarian raises her head quickly, afraid that a member of staff’s come in to supervise. They haven’t, and so she drops her head again. Ten fifty three, ish. Jeongguk blinks sleepily.

All that’s left to do is get his account verified, and life will be forever changed.

(He hopes).

(2)

Yoongi’s apartment is off campus, about fifteen minutes away if he’s walking. It’s small, but significantly bigger than Jeongguk’s dorm on campus, and decorated with whites and creams, big and open windows letting in golden light, when the time’s right. It’s the type of apartment you saw online, on Tumblr posts or in movies, looking like a perfect backdrop - sometimes, Jeongguk can’t believe that Yoongi lives here, and wakes up every morning to the view of the city below his window, power lines like train tracks connecting houses, dangling fairy-lights on the trelacing of his across-the-street-neighbour’s rooftop.

That being said, Jeongguk technically lives here, too. He doesn’t know how long it’s been since he’s actually stepped foot in his dorm at the same time as his roommate; he only goes in there to collect things one at a time. Today, for example, he had dropped by to empty out his small and pathetic wardrobe and put it inside one suitcase, wheeling it right up to Yoongi’s front door with a bright smile that Yoongi couldn’t say no to. His couch in the living room was Jeongguk’s comfortable bed when it wasn’t cold and when it was, Yoongi would huff and offer an invite into his bed, because he loves Jeongguk like he’s his baby brother, and it would suck if he died from pneumonia, or something. He said that to Jeongguk once. Jeongguk smiled for ten minutes afterwards.

Harry Potter plays on TV, the fourth movie because it’s Jeongguk’s favourite and Yoongi’s a sick man who can’t say no. It’s around five, and Jeongguk’s literally been holed up in Yoongi’s apartment the entire day. The most sunlight that he got was when he walked out of Yoongi’s house to take the trash out, and even then, the bin was in the shadows and the sun never touched his skin once. He can see the sunlight through the window, which technically counts. Yoongi cringes and takes away a plate from the coffee table.

“You’re allowed to stay at my place, as long as you clean up after yourself,” he says with a huff. His nose upturns with a scrunch, “No wonder you don’t have a girlfriend.”

“By choice!” Jeongguk adds, pulling a thread out from his sock. “They’re too much hard work.”

“You’re just fucking lazy,” Yoongi points out. He dumps the plate in the sink and comes back to Jeongguk. “You know that, don’t you?”

There’s a silence. Then a sigh, “Yeah.”

Jeongguk loves staying at Yoongi’s place, especially when Yoongi is feeling particularly soft and lets Jeongguk do whatever he wants, given he’s not going to get Yoongi a noise complaint in the morning. The movie continues to play undisturbed, the sight of Beauxbatons’ carriage swooping over towards the runway leaving Jeongguk with an open-mouthed smile on his face and Yoongi folds his arms, burying himself further into the sofa. On the coffee table, Yoongi’s laid out some snacks, both his phone and Jeongguk’s laying down flat because it’s supposed to keep Jeongguk distraction free, even though he’s the type of friend to never be on his phone around his friends unless he absolutely needs to be.

Another huff is in Yoongi’s mouth, begging to be huffed out. Over on the coffee table, Jeongguk’s phone lights up with his lock screen of Sansa Stark blurred out by a notification, the ringer on loud. Attention is pulled from Dumbledore to the light, Jeongguk’s brows lifting with interest but his eyes immediately back on the TV.

“Yoongi,” he calls out, and Yoongi glances over, “can you see who it’s from?” Could be his Mom, it could be important.

The huff is released. “Come into my house and boss me around…” Yoongi mutters under his breath and reaches for Jeongguk’s phone, pressing the home button to read the notification. He’s silent for a long moment, and Jeongguk’s so enthralled in the movie that he doesn’t notice, not until Yoongi looks at Jeongguk with a confused and funny look, his top lip curled to his nostrils as he blurts: “Why the hell are Seeking Arrangements telling you you’re profile’s ready?”

Jeongguk looks away so fast from the television that Yoongi’s almost frightened. His eyes are wide and twinkling, “They’ve finished it?”

“What the fuck.”

“Gimme!” Jeongguk splutters, his hand diving towards his phone urgently. “Bro...it’s been like, five days.”

Yoongi is bewildered. “Why do you have an account? What-why-when…?”

“I don’t know, I need money and I thought it would be funny,” Jeongguk shrugs. His thumb moves quickly across his phone screen. “I can’t believe they’re done. I’m gonna be rich, Yoongi.”

“Do you know how sketchy half the people on that site are?” Yoongi questions. “Plus they’re all old and perverted men.”

“Rich men.”

“Rich, old and perverted,” Yoongi nods. “Guk, I know I said you needed another job...but this doesn’t qualify. I’d rather you flip paper thin pizzas.”

[shaekingshitup]

unintended

A/N: Okay. So, this was supposed to be a completely different story with more thot antics than romance. But then this idea came and I decided to choose this one instead. I’m still just practicing over here. So, any feedback is appreciated. 😊 This is my first and most likely last fic that will be with a real celeb. So, I hope y’all dig it. It will be a series. So, expect more! I'm just not certain how I feel about writing for real humans that exist. AS ALWAYS, shout out to @glittermakesmesmile​​ for always reading first and making things make sense. She’s wonderful. Be on the look out y’all. 👀 

Pairing: Trevor Jackson x Black OC

Warnings: None

Word Count: 2265

“I WANNA FEEL THE HEAT WITH SOMEBODY! YEAAHHHH I WANNA DANCE WITH SOMEBODY. WITH SOMEBODY WHO-” Jayden stopped belting out the Whitney lyrics as her music paused and her Trey Kennedy ringtone filtered through her car’s speakers. 

RING RING RIIIIIIING. RING RING RING RIIIIING RING!

She looked at her screen and the unsaved number which was staring back at her. 

“Hello?” she asked trying not to let the aggression creep into her voice towards whomever had ruined her jam sesh as she weaved through the madness that was LA Traffic. 

“Hey girl, how you doing?” greeted her with a sweet Southern twang

“Oh shit! It’s Terrell” Jayden thought automatically as she began gushing. All aggression was temporarily forgotten. 

“Hey boo! I’m just circling the block trying to find a spot. I’m makin’ a pit stop at Blue Bottle. What’s up? Can I grab a coffee for you?”

“..bring me their Single Origin?” Jayden heard coming through in the background.

“Nigga” Terrell chuckled in an incredulous tone without losing his good humor. 

“Who’s that? Is that Matt?” she asked trying to piece together what was going on. She was supposed to be meeting Terrell in 45 minutes. She was barely 3 miles away from his place. She’d planned  the day out perfectly so that she would be on time, for once in her life.  You only win the Shits & Giggles Song Association once. I mean, how could she be late for THAT?! 

It sounded like there was some sort of disagreement happening on the other end as Terrell’s voice came in high pitched and strained  “No. That’s not Matt, it’s-,”

“Wait, it’s my fault. Let me tell her” said the mystery person on the line. Jayden was confused as she put her car in park and grabbed her headphones so that she could continue to have this conversation while she stood in line at Blue Bottle. 

“Ugh. Okay,” Terrell relented.

“Hey Jayden. It’s Jayden, right?” spoke an unfamiliar male voice on the other line.

“Yes.. and this is?” Jayden questioned as she opened the door and was blindly greeted by a barista.

“Well hopefully,  the one you grab a Cold Brew for.” chuckled out of the other end of her phone. 

“NIG-GUH. Where is my henny? Cuz I can’t wit yo ass,” Terrell hollered in the background and Jayden heard some generous pouring being done.

“Okay. Can someone please explain to me what’s going on? I’m fourth in line so if you want anything I need some answers first. Who is this?”

“Damn. Straight to it. She’s kind of feisty. She gotta be a fire sign.” Jayden heard this come in muffled as if the person was trying to communicate out of her earshot. She sighed outwardly. Typically, she had more patience than this. However, LA traffic really brought out the worst in her. 

“Third in line.” she said, “and about 10 seconds away from using some choice words with you myself.”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Let me explain. My name is Trevor. Trevor Jackson” he paused. Jayden waited for some further explanation. This name wasn’t ringing a whole lot of bells for her and she didn’t see the point in him being on her line. She was still confused; although, having a name did cause her to simmer down a little. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket while he spoke and was getting ready to Google “Trevor Jackson” but she was bombarded by all of the texts she hadn’t received while her phone was in drive mode. 

“Okayy, Trevor who wants me to bring him coffee. What’s going on?” she asked in a genuinely curious tone and without her previous bite. She made her way through the barrage of “Congrats”, “Good luck” & “Don’t Fuck Up!” texts her family and friends had showered her in. 

Trevor took his time providing her with an explanation. He was measuring out his words and how he would respond “Look, I know that you’re scheduled to shoot your Song Association episode with Terrell soon and that’s great! Congratulations on the win, uh, by the way! But, I had a mix up on my end. I thought that I was supposed to meet him today at 2 pm. Instead of next Saturday at 2 and I’m actually going to be unavailable at that time. So, I was thinkin maybe I could go first since I’m already here. Then, Terrell can just shoot yours afterwards? Plus, my mom’s here to watch me do this because she’s a big Terrell fan and it would mean a lot.” 

Well when you play the mom card. Jayden thought 

The boy was lucky there was only one register at this Blue Bottle and that the person ordering right now had a lot of complicated orders or his lengthy answer may have caused him his Cold Brew. 

“Okayy. That makes sense,” Jayden says, “ I blocked off the rest of my day to be here so I can hang around. I get to watch yours right? I mean you’re not gonna just ask me to bring you coffee and then make me leave?” she giggled as a way to relieve the nervousness she felt about the situation and then she waited because she was certain this Trevor guy nor Terrell would ask her to leave. Right?

She was met with silence. Absolute and complete utter silence. There was no sound whatsoever on the other end.

“Hello? Helllo? Did y’all put me on mute?” Three seconds later there was roaring laughter and she stepped forward. She would be next in line real soon.

“Yes! I’m sorry I accidentally put you on mute. But thank you! Thank you! My mother and I truly thank you.”

“It’s okay! Does your mama want anything while I’m here?” Jayden asked. 

“Oh, yeah. Uh please get her the tea. I promise I got you when you get here. 

“It’s fine,” Jayden responded. “Well, I guess I’ll see y'all soon. It’s my turn,”

“Thank you Jayden. I really mean that.”

“Not a problem” she said.

17 minutes later Jayden was sitting in her car in the Guest Parking garage that Terrell had told her to park in when she arrived. 

“Here” she texted. 

“Meet me at the elevator” was her reply. 

Jayden grabbed the drink carrier and her mini black backpack and headed for the elevator. By the time she made it to the door, Roxy was there to let her in. 

“Hi Jayden” she said.

“Oh my goodness, hiii” Jayden said as she gave Roxy a hug with her free hand. It was just sinking in that this was real. She was really about to be on Song Association. She loved watching the series & was ready to come for Miss Amber P Riley’s perfect score. She definitely didn’t have the perfect vocals to match. However, her competitive nature was not going to let her miss out on this opportunity to fuck this game up.  

“Hey girl, thanks for being so cool about today,” Roxy said as they stepped into the elevator. She pressed the button for the fourth floor. “We’re going to be doing lots of filming today so we can get this content out on schedule.”

‘Yeah, it’s no problem,” Jayden responded, “ Like I said,I already set aside the rest of my day for this. So, it’s really not a problem. Plus, this way I get to say I saw this Trevor guy on Terrell first!” she laughed.

“You’ve really never heard of him before?” Roxy inquired.

“Mm-mm” she shook her head in the negative.

“Wellll, you are definitely in for a treat,” Roxy smirked. The elevator dinged to let them know that they had made it to the fourth floor.

She took a right out of the elevator and led the way down the hallway until they made it to unit 414. Roxy opened the door and Jayden was immediately met with fresh air. After the heat of the LA sun, the cold air was refreshing.

“Miss JAY-den!” Terrell called out to her once he heard his front door shut. He set his glass down on the table. She couldn’t help it. She broke out into a full faced grin. She couldn’t even see anything but his hallway and all of her teeth were already on full display. She followed Roxy deeper into the apartment and when she saw him she was so overwhelmed that she wasn’t sure what to do. Terrell hopped off of his stool, removed the drink carrier from her hands by placing it on a nearby table and greeted her with open arms. In that singular moment, Jayden felt welcomed and as if she was the most valued individual in that room. So, of course it was at that time that she made the fated mistake of looking over Terrell’s shoulder and got a real  good look at a well-groomed and delicious piece of chocolate. Trevor gave a slight wave which she returned with a smile. 

“MM. I am so glad that you’re here.” Terrell said as he rubbed circles in her back and gave her all of the reassurance she needed to be there. She was still nervous. But she was starting to think that this was all planned and for a purpose.

“I’m so glad to be here!” she replied as he released her from their embrace. 

“And BIIIIIIIIIITCH. This is a WHOLLEEE ASS LOOK! We gone talk about this later boo. But can I get a twirl?” Jayden did one better. She retreated back towards the hallway and came back in full runway flair. She strutted into the room, twirled and looked over her shoulder as she headed back towards the entrance. Finally, she strutted back one last time and gave Terrell a smirk. His energy was contagious. She had nearly forgotten that there were other individuals in the room.

“Oh yeah. Definitely a fire sign,” Trevor commented as he reached for whatever concoction Terrell had prepared for him prior to her arrival. 

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry. Where are my manners?” She reached for her drink tray and provided him with his Cold Brew, “Trevor, I presume?” she asked as she stretched the drink out to him.  He responded with a smile of his own. 

“That’s me.” Trevor verified nodding his head. He took the drink with his left and shook her hand with his right. “Thank you Jayden. I really do appreciate everything. What do I owe ya?”

“Oh no, that’s fine. Don’t even worry about it.” 

“Nah, I got you. What’s your venmo? Cashapp? Zelle? I got you.” Jayden ignored his queries and responded with his own. 

“Where’s your mama?” Just then, an older Black woman with tight skin, a tight body to match and some of the kindest eyes Jayden had ever seen came from around the corner. She was really out here showing that Black don’t crack and she wasn’t even on camera!

“Hi Mrs. Jackson, my name is Jayden.” she smiled and handed the older woman her tea, “here’s your drink ma’am. I got some sugar too just in case you’re like me and like it sweet.” 

“Thank you so much sweetheart. I love sugar. I need just enough to keep the diabetes at bay” Mrs. Jackson responded as she too embraced Jayden in a hug. “Your timing is perfect actually. I was just heading out.” she said. 

“Oh no, is everything okay?” Jayden asked hoping she wasn’t being too nosey in her first impression. 

“Oh yes darling. Trevor’s brother Ian has an event today too and I told him I would be there. But, I refused to miss the opportunity to meet this young man and see my baby boy get a few songs in on this game.” Mrs. Jackson clarified. “Thank you so much for this tea. Trevor, did you pay this young woman for this?” she asked sharply. Jayden could tell two things about Mrs. Jackson off the bat: 1) she was kind 2) she was no nonsense . The look she gave her son spoke volumes. It said “I know I raised you to be polite. I don’t care who you singin for but you better be respectful and don’t expect nothin from no one. Not even a damn coffee. 

Damn. Jayden thought. 

“I’m working on it ma.” Trevor told her. “Okayy baby” Mrs. Jackson said while continuing to stare at her son. The lecture left her eyes and was replaced with a knowing look while she smiled at her son.

Well Miss Jayden, I mean it.  I do appreciate it, and good luck to you on your game too. I’m sure you’ll be wonderful,” she said as she hugged the young woman one final time.  Mrs. Jackson continued around the room saying goodbye and hugging everyone. “Terrell, make sure you don’t go easy on my baby boy. He got this. We been practicin’, ya know.” .  

Jayden watched the woman, enamored by the similarities between Mrs. Jackson and her favorite aunt.  Jayden was so caught up in her thoughts, she initially missed Mrs. Jackson’s final goodbye to her, catching only enough to ask the woman to repeat herself.  

“I’m sorry Mrs. Jackson, what did you say? Jayden stammered out flustered as she had gotten so in her own head. 

Mrs. Jackson paused before scurrying out the door to support her first born “ I said I’ll see you soon baby”, giving the young woman a wink and mischievous smirk before disappearing out the door. 

Jayden stared at the door, mouth opening trying to figure out what the woman had meant. 

………………………………

TAG LIST: @twistedcharismaaa​ @mygirlrenee​ @glittermakesmesmile​ @sarcastic-sunshines​ @chaneajoyyy​ @shewrites02​ @ghostfacekill-monger​ @raysunshine78​ @shewritestheblues​ @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade​  @fd-writes​ @eyeknowmywrites​​ @thadelightfulone​​

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

20. Sink

Word Count: 3989 Trigger warnings for religion and mentions of child pornography

Previous

Lord, if it’s you,” (Simon) Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then (Simon) Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

Matthew 14:28-30

Simon had never been very religious. Scratch that… Simon had never been very mystical about religion. Whenever he was younger, his family went to church and he was quite studious and learned a lot in that time period. His father still believed in God and country or whatever and his grandmother, he imagined was praying over his mom every single day. But, he had never really known what it felt like to have that kind of faith in anyone or anything… until he was given Grace. It wasn’t lost on him the religious implications of being a boy named Simon (like Simon Peter, aka The Apostle Peter - huge name in the Bible world) being granted a savior, being blessed with Grace after a terrible sin, whether intentional or not, of killing Hope… His mind was in a daze right now. 

It was the fourth religious dream he had since that interview, and in this one, he was Simon Peter, calling to his Savior in the storm. Grace was just across the water. All he had to do was get to her and she would rescue him from all of this, just like she always used to. But, he looked at the impending storm, instead. He had Grace, but he was focused on the storm, and he sank… He jumped up from his sleep and literally felt like he had been drowning. Ugh. 10 years of church and 4 years of private school could definitely mess with one’s mind. Then again, so could 6 years of Grace and 5 years without it… her… 

He had begun to try to stop rationalizing that she wasn’t human. Unfortunately for him, before he considered her the void, she hadn’t been human for him either, then. She had been a deity. He worshipped her. She had been a vessel to save him, to help him, to comfort him. She had been what he built his faith system upon, his religion, his Apex, his lifestyle… Then, she was gone and he tried to continue without her. He tried to rebuild in his own image, in his own name. He tried to walk on water, as he had seen her do, now all he was doing was sinking…

In the aftermath of the interview, Simon noted that his faithful followers went on one of their ravenous attacks in Shana’s comment sections. She could even just post a photo of herself in the newsroom at Spelman as an inspirational post and they appeared in her comments to berate her for speaking about inspiration when she would attack an abuse survivor and have his abuser on her show, trying to make her sympathetic. Shana seemed entertained for some of the comments, replying things like a simple “K” or “Lol” and never addressing the person again, even if they supplied a melee of character attacks at her.

But, on the video link, whenever people started also attacking Grace’s fakeness and the fact that she still gets to abuse Simon indirectly by doing things like this, Shana had enough. She let them know that she had no regrets about the interview with Grace, no regrets about anything that she said about Simon, and none about all of her opinions of him. “Even if he’s a different person today, considering that he never got any backlash for the sex tape from high school, which i firmly STILL believe that he should be held accountable for, which I am convinced that he leaked, and I think that if he’s truly changed, he would have wanted to make that right at some point and free Grace from the uninvited attacks for that CRIME AGAINST HER, committed by him.”

There was an explosion of mixed reactions. Everything from, “This is the first that I’m hearing of this” to “Simon would never have done anything like that to Grace” to “WHERE CAN I FIND A SEX TAPE OF SIMON AND GRACE???” Many people were blocked. Many people were rocked, as Shana went live to address the massive amount of comments coming from her spilling that tea.

She made mention of the facts that while the statute of limitations of revenge porn had been exceeded, they didn’t exist for child porn. “And in case anybody is confused, yes, I am including links to inform you about how what he did is in fact child pornography creation, possession, and distribution, AND what the law says concerning them.” After replying to many of the comments, mostly in an amused fashion, she got bored. 

“Listen, I’m getting ready to go chill with my lady and get ready for class tomorrow, but I’ll just say this one more thing, “I’m not taking my foot off of Simon Laurent’s neck. As long as Grace has had to suffer in silence, because she’s no longer the vengeful type or whatever, she’s on right now in her journey, the journalist in me and the enraged victim in me will always come for Simon and the way he used the privilege that he did have - not to say that he didn’t lack in certain areas like money and common decency, but the ones he DID have - his race, his gender, his orientation, his proximity to education, etc, in order to vilify and humble this girl with false accusations of crimes, and get away with unconfessed crimes. Yeah, this IS about my Sassy Strawberry keychain, Simon you bitch! I know you watching. To those of you who can’t be bothered to use your Googles, I don’t know what to tell you, kinfolk. Shady Shana has said all that she needs to say for now. Tata, from the perfect place for shade.”

Then her accusations, the search for the information of said accusations and the buzz from back then resurfacing went even more viral than the things that he had said about Grace whenever he reached notoriety from the stories. Now that the Internet and social media were even bigger and just kept growing with time, Grace still being a huge public persona, despite the few short years that she wasn’t online and the time she had been inside, she made an explosive comeback at least as an Internet personality, and Simon was never as frequent online as he was a short time in the eye of the public to get himself established, but several professors had used his story for various seminars and lectures, his books did pretty well, and he was a very established young mind in his academic circles… So, he was a big deal in his world, but on the grand scale becoming infamous for this new attention. 

Shana and Grace’s worlds were very large, and both of those were combining to infiltrate his world with these not necessarily new pieces of information, but things that he thought would have been forgotten or left alone. He had not even considered that Shana would ever… Like… why was SHE so damn upset? Because of a small scuffle? Because of somebody else’s alleged injustice? Somebody that she didn’t even LIKE for most of her life? “Journalist” she was a shit-stirrer! All of her muckraking was making things complicated for simple Simon. He didn’t like that. He didn’t like dreaming about Grace as his savior. He didn’t like the idea of reaching out to her to get her to grab her dog. He didn’t like that he was suffering from nights more sleepless than usual and beginning to become counterproductive in his work.

Worrying about ramifications of the words “child pornography” and “sexual predator” being tossed about in conversations with his name led to nightmares, paranoia, guilt, intrusive thoughts, and mistakes in class and at work. One of them turned out big…

Amelia came up to him in her lab, with her arms folded and her face stern, “Is there anything you think we should discuss, Mr. Laurent?” He frowned and glanced her way, still working on the formula for the next tests in the prosthetics serum they were spending time discussing as one of his potential next big things. She raised her eyebrows and asked, “Not even an acknowledgment of what I’m speaking of?”

“I know what you’re speaking of and I decided that no, we don’t need to discuss it. It’s a personal matter.”

“A personal matter? Simon, you are supposed to be seeing a counsellor once a week, and now I find out that not only did he recommend that you see him twice a week, but that you haven’t seen him in several weeks! It is part of your ability to stay here, and I don’t appreciate that you’ve ducked out on this requirement, especially considering the personal matter you’re referring to.” 

He furrowed his eyebrows and set down his supplies. “This is about the shrink? I haven’t been able to see the guy, because I’ve been working on the new formula nonstop. I need a breakthrough, and if I can get the formula right for enhancing the prosthetics, I’ll be famous for that. I’ll be closer to the goal of enriching artificial organs, maybe even organic ones!”

“I know what this work would mean if successful. That isn’t the point. The point is that you are not allowed to be here without the help that you need and you agreed to. I’m going to have to speak to the committee, now that I know you haven’t been…” She turned and he caught her wrist really hard. The woman jerked away. She was stronger than he thought.

“Amelia… Please. I need this. People are out to get me. Out to destroy everything that I’ve built for myself, without parents, without love, without an inheritance. I got here on my own merit, my own mind! I can’t have it be the thing that gets me sent away.”

“You needed to consider that after we gave you another chance! We can’t keep going back and forth with you while you refuse to take the help that you need in order to get to your next rung!” She was loud. He felt like she was yelling at him. He didn’t like people yelling at him, especially women, especially older ones… It made him extremely angry and he yelled right back at her, only to find that she either hadn’t been yelling or she had an even louder yelling setting.

“I’M DOING MY GODDAMN BEST!”

“MAYBE YOUR BEST ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH!”

And in addition to the yelling, the thing yelled was extremely hurtful. But, Simon was an angry hurt type. So, he was hurt, but it manifested in anger, “LIKE YOURS WASN’T! YOU HATE ME BECAUSE I CAN BE A BETTER YOU!” She laughed. That made him even angrier. “ADMIT IT! YOU’RE SO HARD ON ME BECAUSE I AM BETTER THAN YOU!”

“Simon, you’re a child. A foolish, often incorrect child. There are many things that I credit as better than me. You aren’t one of them.” He was breathing hard and clenching his fists. “I advise you to immediately set an appointment with your therapist and I demand that you leave the lab at once. At the very least, you need to take a break. At worse… you broke our agreement, Simon.” She began to touch his research, to put everything away, as he stormed out, trying not to let her see him cry and trying not to explode in the lab and further mess things up for himself. He didn’t get far before there was a different explosion in there. Not an extremely loud one, but loud enough that he turned around as others rushed in. 

Simon got on the phone, calling the last counselor that he had spoken to as everyone else scurried about trying to get help and rushing in various directions. “She was just arguing with Laurent, he rushed out and then this happened,” he heard someone say and he watched the three students who had been talking stop and look right at him.  “Are you calling 911?” One of them asked. He shook his head, because he hadn’t been. Once again, it wasn’t his first thought when he witnessed an emergency. One of them grabbed their phone out, presumably to do so and he… left. He probably should have stayed, but he couldn’t breathe and needed some space and needed to rage.

.

It didn’t take others long to start whispering. Simon had found a dumpster to kick for a while before returning to the scene and seeing them rushing Amelia into an ambulance. Police were there and wanted to talk with him. He knew that people would talk. They had been talking. He also knew that sometimes he imagined that people were talking more than they actually were and he hoped that perhaps, this would be one of those times that he imagined the criticism. It was not.

On top of the internet’s allegations of child pornography, learning that the state of California might be investigating these allegations, for the Monroe Estate, and being questioned about his chemical engineering “mistake” with the formula that became unstable as Professor Hughes attempted to put it away… 

Simon was whatever the opposite of numb was. He felt all things, everything, anything, all at once and at a peak. He hadn’t felt this way in a really long time and the only times he had, he had Grace to think of and settle him. After that, he had his own greatness to reflect upon… but that was slipping away from him and Grace had slipped away… No… He had shoved her away, and he needed her so much right now. Because he didn’t know if he could pull himself up from sinking. “Lord save me!” He heard himself yelling from the water in the storm… But Grace couldn’t hear him. She was too far away, and she wasn’t his savior anymore. He looked up for something to latch onto, but all there was, was the Void.

Its big black, form, with an aura of fluid black smoke, and hovered over him and charged at him, its face stopping just short of his own and he looked up to see it. It was nothing but a pale mask, much like one of the ones that Grace used to wear. Maybe… Maybe she was still inside of the void somewhere. Maybe she would rescue him after all. “Grace?” he called, “Is that you?” It had nothing in it’s face. No feeling, no warmth. There was no way that Grace was there. It had no reply. He blinked it away and looked at the police. They had just released him… so… something had saved him… for now. Probably just dumb luck, or lack of evidence. There had to be a lack of evidence, because he knew that he had done nothing wrong.

Despite having done nothing wrong, he had apparently made some type of mistake with the formula, but he figured it was more likely that Amelia had made some mistake in putting it away. It was too soon to voice that opinion. Students were upset, like she was some lovable figure. She was a bitch. He didn’t feel bad at all that she was hurt and he hoped that nobody expected him to act like he did. But, they were talking again. He felt like whenever he was a freshman at the academy and the staff and students didn’t appreciate him because they hadn’t seen his value yet… but these people knew him. He was important! He was significant now! He had done everything to become valuable and honored, including giving up Grace when she was holding him back! 

“Simon, it sounds like you’re just blaming everyone else for your problems again.”

“I’m only saying what happened. I matter, and they treat me like I don’t. They look at me like I’m a criminal. They’re handling me like I haven’t done great things! Like they haven’t heard of me or something! Who do they think they are?”

“To not value you? Maybe they’re just strangers, Simon. You’ve spoken to me a few times, and I don’t know you, either. That doesn’t take away from anything that you might have done, but it doesn’t give me the insight that you have of yourself. The same can be said about any of the people here,” the counsellor said. Simon resumed his meetings, but it was too little too late, as he was called back to the committee.

.

Grace was really just trying to enjoy her life. She only did the interview with Shana because Shana had REALLY come through in finding Hazel for her. She explained to the people keeping Hazel how she knew her and how she found her (not mentioning Shana’s name, but that she “hired an investigator”) mainly because she just wanted to see how Hazel was doing. The short answer was “not great,” but the long answer was Grace hated the fact that everyone that she talked to about Hazel didn’t seem to really know her or how to deal with her. That made her afraid that Hazel would continue to get bounced around, and eventually be lost to her again. After being approved as someone who could visit and spend time with Hazel (a longer process than she would have liked, and one that she knew could have been shortened if she just went crawling back to her parents), but one that was worth the work, because not only was she able to see Hazel and talk to her, but she also got her a phone, in case they were separated again and Hazel needed to reach out to her. 

The last thing that Grace wanted to do was be dragged into Simon’s situation. So, whenever people asked her about him, sent her messages, intruded into her comments, @ her in posts… she declined from responding. She made a statement on her linked social media accounts, reminding everyone that 1. She doesn’t speak about Simon. 2. She said everything that she intended to say to people outside of the situation to Shana in the interview. 3. She is not responsible for Shana’s feelings about the incident in question (the recording and sharing of the recording) 4. She has never spoken to anyone but Simon about the incident in question and doesn’t plan on going much more in depth with anybody about it any time soon. 

Whenever asked about the recording, since she did say in the statement that she had spoken with Simon about it, and it was presumed that meant that maybe they had made it together and it got leaked, as those things tend to do, she confirmed that she didn’t know anything about the recording until after everyone else had seen it, that she doesn’t like to think about it or that time in her life because it was one of her most embarrassing and painful experiences and she doesn’t want to have to relive it simply because people are curious about these details that don’t affect them one way or another…

People were relentless and dedicated to being in other people’s business. What about Simon? It affects Simon! Why aren’t you helping clear Simon’s name? Why are you still hurting Simon? What about affecting Simon? She’d punch every last one of these people in the mouth, just like she did Simon when she found out, if they were in front of her. Even, now, being  someone trying very hard to be peaceful and patient… “Simon already knows everything about that time that I would be able to say, so telling anyone else anything wouldn’t help him or me. If I was silent about it whenever it might have actually changed my trajectory in a favorable way, I’m certainly not going to begin going off about it now that I’ve been given another chance at a positive life, despite the things that caused me pain. Simon knows more than I do and more than you. Perhaps you should ask him, if you want someone who doesn’t seem to mind speaking about these subjects.”

That was what did it. Simon watched in a panic as former Apex members, arose to defend Grace and admit that during the time, Simon was open with certain people about having orchestrated the recording and using it to oust Grace from her throne. “We were mean kids, and I don’t know if we thought far ahead enough to really see what something like that could do to somebody. We all found it either funny or scary and weren’t brave enough to stand up for her back then, but Grace did nothing wrong and people should let her live her life instead of bringing this back up and hurting her again.” They basically all said some variation of that.

He became immediately notorious as #GraceDidNothingWrong began trending and multiple Apex members, former nonessentials, declared nulls, and actual victims of some of Simon’s direct attacks come forward, opening up about their experiences with Simon’s Apex, the Apex in general, including anecdotes, quotes, confessions, etc to further prove Simon’s guilt. To top it off Simon was put on academic probation as everything unfolded including the way he had been handling his psychiatric deal with the committee being unmet and the negligence that led to Professor Hughes’ accident. When he began losing various deals, gets major backlash for the accident, on top of the allegations of child pornography being investigated, he began to spiral as he considered possible charges from CA to MA. He deleted all of his social media accounts and shadow cyberstalked Grace, only to see that she really wasn’t participating in all of this.

He was SO CLOSE to his first Master’s degree. He couldn’t let all of this throw away his future! He was young and stupid and maybe he was wrong, but he wasn’t going to say that and he definitely didn’t feel like he deserved to be punished for it right now! 

He had been trying not to think about that interview, but the more he tried not to think about it, the more he obsessed over it - over her wondering how he was doing, over the potential for her to actually still care. It was so stupid. It was foolish. There was no way that she really felt like that, but all of his distraction had caused him to possibly make some type of stupid mistake. The police were investigating, but he was the main one working in the lab, so whatever happened was most likely due to some type of misstep on his part. He certainly had not rigged anything to explode in Professor Hughes’ face, like some seemed to be trying to suggest! 

The fact that they did not get along wasn’t very helpful to him. The argument right before it happened made it even more suspicious, and where they should have been able to speak with his psychiatrist to ensure that he was doing fine… he hadn’t been consistent with any long enough for them to know that he was doing fine… which brought attention back on him from the committee, which he guessed felt like he was jumping through loopholes in their deal. He saw the Void again, it's voice like a chorus of succubi singing, “I’ve come to take everything from you. It’s what you deserve.”

He rushed to the airport. He didn’t even have a place to stay. He rushed to the Monroe’s, snuck into their gate and beat on the door. It was 2 am, but he couldn’t wait. The Void was after him, and he NEEDED his Grace.

Next

[johannesviii]

Top 10 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2016

I think everyone will agree that 2016 had “Impending Doom” written all over it, and as a result a lot of pop music became very depressed very quickly, and as such, I’m less enthusiastic about this list than some of the previous ones.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

For a year that was so cataclysmic worldwide, 2016 was pretty mundane for me, so let’s just skip to the albums that came out that year and which I consider relevant to my tastes. Obviously (and unfortunately) there was David Bowie with Black Star. We should have known we had jumped right into the Worst Timeline when the year started with the death of Bowie. Nine Inch Nails also released Not The Actual Events, which was pretty good, and as I said previously I consider Coldplay’s A Head Full of Dreams to be more of a 2016 than a 2015 album. And then there was the biggest surprise of all, the return of Enigma after eight years of silence, with the very good Fall Of A Rebel Angel (even if A Posteriori is still my favorite “modern” Enigma album). EDIT: I forgot Ghostlights by Avantasia. Took me YEARS to listen to it & realise how good it was.

But no. Surprisingly enough, my favorite album of the year wasn’t any of those. It was... oh god, that title. Here we go. It was I Like It When You Sleep for You Are So Beautiful yet So Unaware of It by The 1975 - which I like to call “The 1975′s second album” instead, because what the hell, guys. Anyway. It had been a while since I had found a new band I’d consider to be one of my favorite bands. I really liked Chocolate from their previous album but that was it. But this one? What a breath of fresh air. A Change of Heart, She’s American, Please Be Naked, The Ballad Of Me And My Brain, Somebody Else, The Sound, This Must Be My Dream? That’s only the songs I listened to on a loop and that’s already nearly half of the album. Great music, love the vocals, but I especially love the writing, full of strange and awkward details and lines that make everything feel so alive. The first time I listened to some of these songs, some lines actually got a chuckle out of me, like the American girl wanting the narrator to fix his teeth, or him hopping on a bus to ask the passengers if someone found his brain, or his girlfriend complaining about his shoes and his songs then immediately adding “I thought that you were straight, now I’m wondering”.

As someone who’s constantly puzzled by human relationships and tends to act super awkwardly, all of this is extremely relatable. So yeah. Album of the year, love this band - impatiently waiting for that fourth album!

As far as unelligible songs go, as you can guess I’m furious The Sound (The 1975) wasn’t a hit because I was and I’m still listening to it on a loop. And that’s about it. Wait there’s also Kids by One Republic. It was super good. Apart from that, there’s also one (1) elligible song that I’m gonna put on the 2017 list instead because I really struggled to find enough songs I liked for that list, and that particular one is elligible for 2016 thanks to the French year-end list and 2017 thanks to the US year-end list, so eh.

Time for some honorable mentions.

This Girl (Kungs vs Cookin’ on Three Burners) - Number one of the year here. Every time I heard it (and I heard it a lot) I enjoyed it until that wretched drop.

Fast Car (Jonas Blue ft Dakota) - Not a good cover, but I love the original so much I’d be lying if I said I hated this completely.

Sucker for Pain (Lil Wayne & Imagine Dragons) - No, that slow, heavy, tortured beat that all recent Imagine Dragons songs have doesn’t work on topics like being a natural at something, being a believer, or describing thunder. It does work, however, with a chorus saying “I'm just a sucker for pain”.

Cheap Thrills (Sia ft Sean Paul) - Sean Paul, and a song about having fun without any money. Everything I want from an average hit song on the radio.

In the Night (The Weeknd) - This would be much higher if I didn’t find The Weeknd’s upper register slightly painful to listen to.

J’ai Cherché (Amir) - Hey look, the guy France sent to Eurovision that year. He’s still around, too. He’s pretty good, and that song is super cute.

Ride (21 Pilots) - Not the last time they will appear on this list.

Je Suis Chez Moi (Black M) - Pretty good song about racism, and the singer explicitly calls out a far right political figure who said some pretty terrible shit about him, and it’s a good answer.

Perfect (One Direction) - This is just Style by Taylor Swift all over again except slightly less good. But as I said before, copying good songs isn’t always a bad thing.

Human (Rag’n’bone Man) - Would definitely be on the list if listening to it didn’t feel like working.

Into You (Ariana Grande) - The last cut. The ending is wonderful and explosive, it’s just a shame that the entire song doesn’t sound like that.

And now... the list.

10 - Stressed Out (21 Pilots)

US: #5 / FR: #9

Defining song of the entire year, whether you liked it or not.

Fortunately, as you can see, I liked it a lot, even if I don’t have anything interesting to say about it.

9 - Don’t Be So Shy (Imany, Filatov & Karas remix)

US: Not on the list / FR: #2

I often joked that the melody sounded weirdly similar to Goldman’s “Envole-moi” by singing the lyrics of the verses over the Don’t Be So Shy verses, and it fits nearly perfectly. But apart from that, great song, great remix, very overplayed but never to the point of being annoying.

8 - I Took A Pill In Ibiza (Mike Posner)

US: #15 / FR: #29

There’s nothing I could say about this song that Todd hasn’t said before in what I consider to be one of his best reviews, if not the best, so here it is.

7 - Heathens (21 Pilots)

US: #21 / FR: #23

Super ominous and tense. It’s rare when a mostly grey song looks interesting, and this one definitely does. I also like the ending a lot. Don’t hang out with too many toxic people, guys, they will influence you over time.

I had no idea this was made for the Suicide Squad movie until very recently and frankly I wish it hadn’t because it’s way better on its own, especially the hand grenade line which works a lot better as a metaphor for self-destructive tendencies.

6 - Starboy (The Weeknd)

US: #58 / FR: #16

As I said before it took me ages to like The Weeknd. His voice is great but I found most of his songs fairly boring or disliked their lyrics. And then he teamed up with Daft Punk and to be honest, I didn’t even care if the lyrics of this one included weird lines about drugs on furniture, the beat was completely worth it and the singing was great. Not enough to put it on my mp3 playlist, but a delight every time it was on the radio.

5 - Faded (Alan Walker)

US: Not on the list / FR: #11

I adore this post-apocalyptic, contemplative music video. The music itself has this weariness and this quiet despair that felt super relevant, and even the drop is a bit slow instead of energetic. I usually don’t like this kind of song but this one found the perfect balance. If we really need to have more sad, exhausted hit songs, more like this, please.

4 - Closer (The Chainsmokers)

US: #10 / FR: Not on the list

I usually don’t like love songs if they are just that, random love songs without a good melody or good colors or good stories. If the melody isn’t particularly great and the colors boring, it needs to paint an interesting picture, and the more details the better, even if they are super awkward, like, as I said previously, in some of The 1975′s best songs mentioning bad shoes, or people’s jobs, or how a car smells like.

So yeah, what I’m trying to say is that my favorite thing about this song is the over-abundance of weird and kind of off-putting details that most people consider to be its main flaw. To each their own, I guess.

3 - Never Forget You (Zara Larsson & MNEK)

US: #46 / FR: Not on the list

See, this is one of the reasons why I decided to make these lists: to find great stuff I missed over the years. I discovered this song while making the 1.0 version of the lists on a google sheet in early December, and now this has a spot on my mp3 player. And it’s so weird because this song shouldn’t work. The drop is ridiculously lifeless compared to the soaring quality of the chorus and it actively works against the rest of the song. It takes a while to get used to it and I’m still not entirely sure it does work, at all.

But what can I say, framing is, once again, everything, and songs about imaginary friends are super rare, and that music video made me cry and catapulted this song from “that’s pretty good” right into the “holy shit that’s fantastic” category. And it made me rewatch Where The Wild Things Are, so yeah.

2 - Perfect Strangers (Jonas Blue)

US: Not on the list / FR: #70

This, on the other hand, stayed on my mp3 player for about two years, and the music fits the lyrics perfectly. It’s not a groundbreaking song, it’s not even that original, but in such an average year for pop music, “happy energetic song with beautiful colors and nice lyrics” meant the world to me. It’s kind of telling that it was enough to put it as high as #2, though.

1 - Hymn For the Weekend (Coldplay ft Beyoncé)

US: #73 / FR: Not on the list

And with this, Coldplay has officially topped as many of my lists as Linkin Park. If, back when The Scientist dropped, you had told me how much I would love this band in the future, I would have laughed pretty hard, but here we are.

But yeah, it’s one of my favorite songs on the album and it’s a super weird combo of heavy and aerial sounds, soft and super colorful notes, and I love the lyrics that completely mirror that feeling, feeling “drunk and high", “poured on a symphony when I’m low, low, low”. A great party song that’s also strangely melancholic. Exactly what I needed.

And then the Seeb remix happened and added a truely fantastic drop on top of an already great song, like turning the saturation up and adding little pulsing lights and transparency effects and shit. It’s sincerely hypnotic and visually so complex and fragile I’m afraid I won’t be able to draw it if I ever attempt to turn it into a synesthesia drawing. Just like A Sky Full of Stars, I was driving the first time I heard that remix on the radio, and I wasn’t expecting that drop at all, and I was gawking.

Godspeed, Coldplay, I’m so glad you’re still a positive force in my life, especially in these trying times.

Next up: Oh my god are you telling me that after 15 years I can finally put a song from that other band at the top of one of my lists

[habitatforhufflepuffs]

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald Opinions

If it isn’t obvious already, spoilers for Crimes of Grindelwald ahead. Also I apologize for how longwinded this is. I just started typing and before I knew it, I had a novel. Bare with me. 

First off, I would just like to say that I absolutely loved the movie, like LOVED. I don’t think it’s possible for me to watch a movie that takes place in the wizarding world and not love it. 

That being said, I had a few issues, minor ones though. I’ve been seeing a lot of reviews floating around where people are complaining about the fact that the entire movie felt like a set up for another sequel, whereas the first one felt like an actual standalone movie, but like, of course it did??? The first one set up the universe this franchise is going to take place in so obviously it’s a full story. The second one is now setting up the overarching plot that’s going to take place over the next four movies so like obviously a lot of it is going to be exposition of characters and isn’t going to conclude the storyline seeing as each movie isn’t taking place one a year like the HP movies did. 

If I had one actual complaint, it would be that there was A LOT going on at once. Which like, I get it because there’s so many characters to introduce that are going to be important moving forward. It was just a lot of new characters introduced in a short period of time that needed backstories and explaining all at once. As well as, what, like four separate plots happening all at once that all merged together by the end of the movie? Which like yeah I get it, it was just a lot to follow. I did go on to read the screenplay of the movie that just came out, and it was a bit easier to follow than the actual movie, so I 10/10 would recommend reading that. Especially the scene where they’re in the Lestrange family mausoleum, and maybe it was just me but I found the screenplay a little easier to follow what was going on than the actual movie which is weird?? Maybe the movie will be easier second watch through. 

I wasn’t a huge fan of the whole Credence is Leta Lestrange’s long lost brother?? Just kidding no he’s not?? But wait who is he then?? scene because like it was a lot to follow all at once trying to understand who the shit was related and how. Especially considering you’ve got 3 siblings from 3 different sets of parents & then you find out there’s a fourth child that was switched with one of them??? Which again, read the screenplay, it’s easier to follow when you can read full names and go at a slower pace and everything. 

As for the plot twist/cliffhanger at the end, I’m very interested to see where that goes moving forward. I’ve seen many people that think Grindelwald was lying to Credence to gain his trust seeing as he was obviously lying in saying Dumbledore wanted him dead. But I don’t really think that’s the case. Solely because I can’t see them doing the whole “Credence is Leta Lestrange’s brother, psych,” thing only to then turn around and then go, “Credence is Albus Dumbledore’s brother, psych,” immediately following. It would just be kind of ridiculous to have Credence’s parentage revealed only for it to be a red herring twice. 

I’ve also seen a lot of people trying to explain how it wasn’t possible for Credence to be Dumbledore’s brother. I will also say now that after a minimal amount of googling, it 100% is possible, if he’s his half brother only. In this movie (as confirmed by the screenplay), Credence was born in 1901 and was being transported to America in this year. We know Dumbledore’s mother died in 1899, and was killed by Ariana, therefore he can’t be her son. But it’s unknown what year his father died in, just that it was after 1890 in Azkaban. Now, obviously it’s kind of a weird thought but it’s 100% possible that somehow Dumbledore’s father Percival sired another child after he was imprisoned in Azkaban via another woman and that that child is Credence. How Grindelwald knows about this, I have no idea. Especially considering that not much time passes between FB1 and FB2, and he was in custody at MACUSA between the two movies. As well as how Credence ended up in America and Leta ended up back in Britain I’m not exactly sure. But it is completely possible. 

That being said, a bunch of people have pointed out that how is it possible that Dumbledore had another brother that has somehow never been mentioned before now, even though HP takes place after FB obviously. If I had to guess, and it breaks my heart to say this, I’m assuming Credence doesn’t survive the FB franchise because if he died, and Aberforth didn’t know of his existence, then it would make sense why he’s never been mentioned. Dumbledore wasn’t exactly open about Ariana, so it would (plausibly) make sense that Credence was never mentioned. Kinda weird, but still plausible. 

One thing I’ve seen EXCESSIVE amounts of complaining about is the McGonagall cameo. Which like, yeah I get it, it breaks canon. But there’s TONS of people that aren’t aware of McGonagall’s backstory seeing as it wasn’t in the HP books, and even if it were, there was a HELL of a lot of information from the books that never made it to the movies (I’m looking at you, Peeves). So like, just let it go and leave it be??? If you’re gonna be nitpicky about canon you could also argue that they made James & Lily way older than they should’ve been in the movies & technically McGonagall would’ve been 46 the night that they died, but in the movies when she’s at the Dursley’s with Dumbledore she looks WAY older than that. So like, just think of the Pottermore information as part of the book universe and the FB movies as part of the movie universe??? 

Also there was a lot of people I saw that were pissed off that they didn’t make it clear enough that Dumbledore was gay, and that were mad that the story didn’t put enough focus on his feelings toward Grindelwald, which I’m sorry I have to call complete bullshit on. This is only the second instalment of a five movie series and Dumbledore & Grindelwald didn’t even share any scenes together. What did you want?? Dumbledore to cover himself in glitter and strip of his shirt to reveal a tattoo that says I love Gellert???? The Mirror of Erised scene alone couldn’t have made it any clearer that Dumbledore is gay and was in love with Grindelwald. The look of pain on his face alone every time he said he couldn’t make a move against Grindelwald made it VERY CLEAR that there were feelings involved. Also, “we were more than brothers.” What the fuck else could that have meant???? They took a goddamn blood oath that they wouldn’t fight each other. There’s still three movies to go in delving further into their relationship, obviously we’re not going to get the whole story in the second movie. So to all of the people saying it wasn’t clear enough, fuck off. 

As far as the movie as a whole, I LOVED IT. Even if it did have too many plot lines happening at once, I still absolutely loved it. The new characters they introduced were fantastic (I’m kind of in love with Theseus). The new creatures they introduced were FANTASTIC. (somebody buy me a kelpie, and also, BABY NIFFLERS!!!!!). Jude Law was an absolutely perfect Dumbledore. Even Johnny Depp as Grindelwald was super unsettling and did a great job. The opening sequence of Grindelwald breaking out of captivity with the Thestral carriage and the final sequence with Grindelwald’s blue magic against everyone else’s fire were phenomenal. And as much as some people didn’t like the ending, I personally love that Credence and Queenie ended up on Grindelwald’s side (and it makes complete sense why to me too) and I’m super excited to see where that goes from here on out. I loved that everyone lost someone in one way or another too. (Newt & Theseus lost Leta, and Jacob & Tina lost Queenie and Nagini lost Credence to Grindelwald) Everyone’s split on different sides and it definitely sets emotional stakes for everybody moving forward. 

I loved how merciless Grindelwald was too & how powerful they made him. Like he’s chained up in prison and being transported by like twelve aurors and still manages to escape??? finds a baby in the house he took over??? who gives a shit, kill the baby??? he’s goddamn fighting off like ten fully trained wizards at once in the final sequence of the movie BY HIMSELF and is winning until the IMMORTAL BEING that’s 500+ years old shows up, and we’re only in the second movie of five. The final battle sequence in HP was a conclusion of 8 movies & Voldemort’s struggling to fight against one seventeen year old wizard that never even finished school??? Grindelwald is badass as hell. (also, a villain that vapes projections of the future, what more could u want??)

Also, the nostalgia that hit me like a fucking truck when they first panned over Hogwarts and Hedwig’s theme kicked in???? Also young Newt??? Also Leta Lestrange is sick as hell, and I’m not convinced she’s dead yet. 

Basically I’m super into Theseus and Dumbledamn, and I need 2020 to come faster, right now. If anyone wants to scream with me, please shoot me an ask, I need someone to rant to. None of my friends share my excessive HP obsession. Also, I kind of want an entire movie of just Newt taking care of his creatures tbh. 

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. 

[potsiespoons]

[Image description under the cut because it’s a 10-panel comic and yikes.]

My latest comic with Dysautonomia Advocacy Foundation! I had posted on my Instagram about feeling lonely, and because loneliness is a pretty common chronic illness thing, they asked if I’d tackle it in a comic. If you know somebody with a chronic illness, please don’t forget to check in with them and make sure they’re doing okay! And if you have a chronic illness, there are lots of ways to reach out to people who understand your condition! It’s always important to remember that, even if you feel lonely, you’re not alone. <3

Image description: The first panel says, “Let’s talk...Loneliness!” with a stick-figure girl--Potsie--standing beneath it. She’s holding a cassette tape and saying, “The following comic is best read while listening to this great mixtape I made!” The mixtape is titled, “Potsie’s Lonely Mix, Vol. 1″ and contains the following songs: One is the Loneliest Number, Magic Stones, So Lonely, another song called So Lonely, Piano Man (it has a line about loneliness okay), Dancing with Myself, Mr. Lonely, and Eleanor Rigby. 

The second panel says, “Loneliness is one of those things that everyone has to deal with from time to time, but those with chronic illnesses may experience loneliness much more frequently than the average, healthy human,” and has a drawing of Potsie sighing. Beside her it says, “The loneliness of the average, healthy turtle has yet to be determined, as people generally don’t think to ask a turtle how it’s doing.” There is also a sighing turtle.

The third panel says, “You won’t find loneliness listed as a symptom in official diagnoses or Google searches, but that doesn’t make it any less real or easier to deal with.” Potsie stands by and says, “Actually, the fact that it’s not really mentioned anywhere probably makes it harder to deal with...”

The fourth panel says, “Chronic illnesses are often disabling, due to pain, fatigue, and other various symptoms. Because of this, many chronic illness patients find it difficult to work or go to school--the usual places where people meet other people. It can also be hard for them to go on outings or to events with friends. It’s not because they don’t want to go, it’s because their bodies say they can’t go.” Potsie is sitting in a comfy chair with a book and says, “The heart wants what the body refuses to give...”

The fifth panel says, “This all adds up to many chronic illness patients becoming involuntary hermits.” There is a picture of a surprised Potsie in a rocking chair, next to an older dude in a rocking chair. He is smoking and holding a shotgun--and he also happens to be my high school AP Lit teacher, whose retirement goals included sitting on his porch with a shotgun, smoking stale cigarettes, and drinking generic beer while yelling at punks to get off his lawn. True story. The comic goes on to say, “And while books and Netflix are great, they’re no substitute for human interaction. Enter: Loneliness.” There is another picture of Potsie in her comfy chair with her book, but this time she is SHOCKED as another figure, named Loneliness, bursts through the door and shouts, “WHO’S READY TO WALLOW IN SELF-PITY?!”

The sixth panel says, “Those with chronic illnesses can feel especially lonely in a group of people, because their condition leads to a life that many healthy people can’t relate to, making it difficult to fit in.” Potsie is sitting with a group of people, feeling sad and uncomfortable and looking very left-out.

The seventh panel says, “People with chronic illnesses don’t want to be totally cut off from the world--we want to have friends, just like anybody else--but our physical conditions make interacting with the world difficult, and we have to navigate situations differently than our healthy peers.” Potsie stands at a sign that says, “This way!” ... “Or, uh, maybe this way...?”

The eighth panel says, “If you have a friend with a chronic illness, remember to reach out to them. Remind them that they are cared for and thought about! Invite them to easy going, accessible environments--or ask if it’s okay for you to go to them! Even a text conversation goes a long way towards cheering a person up.” Potsie is cuddled up in a blanket with her phone. She’s just gotten a text that says, “Thinking of u! Wanna chat?” and she is very happy.

The ninth panel says, “And if you have a chronic illness and feel lonely, there are things you can do, too! If you’re able to, look for chronic illness (or “spoonie”) meet-ups in your area--and if you can’t find any, consider starting one at your favorite coffee shop or local library! Getting to know your fellow chronic illness warriors is a great remedy to loneliness!” There is a drawing of Potsie sitting with a group of people, this time looking happy and engaged in the conversation. One of the others has a cane, one has an NG-tube, and one is in a wheelchair. 

The tenth panel says, “There are also a lot of online support groups, from Facebook groups to official organizations like DAF! Try to get connected with one of these communities--or even a few of them! After all, who said the friends you meet online aren’t real?” Potsie is sitting at her computer and answers the question: “Stupid people,” she says. “But we don’t listen to them, because they’re dumb. Hashtag sorry-not-sorry.”

THE END. 

[thebluezebra]

Create Blog Post

create the perfect post so what are all

the different elements of a post that is

just awesome and can really bring a lot

of readers in this video is not going to

be too long because I feel like you

don't have to overcomplicate things it

doesn't take too many elements to really

create the perfect post I certainly try

to include all of these if I can but if

seo services in Delhi

you can't just try to include as many as

possible okay so grab a pen and paper

and let's just dive into this element

number one and out of this world

purpose nobody has time for fluff bows

okay there's nothing more obnoxious than

getting on a website or getting an email

from somebody saying hey come check out

my latest post it's really awesome but

it doesn't really have any sort of

purpose it's not solving a problem it's

not any sort of important blog update or

anything like that it was just kind of

thrown out there because they felt like

oh I hadn't written in a long time I

should probably get something out there

and they just threw in what I consider a

fluff post it's a waste of your time and

it's a waste of their time so make sure

that every single blog post has an

out-of-this-world purpose element number

two a subscriber incentive now this

doesn't mean that if you write 50 posts

you have to have 50 different subscriber

incentives I don't believe in that

nobody has time for that kind of stuff

but what I like to do and what I hope

that you're doing is you have a niche

that's specific enough that you can kind

of apply the same subscriber incentive

to multiple blog posts so let's say for

example that you have a personal finance

spreadsheet and it's used to track all

of you know someone's income and

expenses so you write about budgeting

you write about the myths about personal

finance you write about different tips

about saving that spreadsheet could

easily be offered in all of those blog

posts it's not like you had to create

three different spreadsheets and it's

important to offer a subscriber

incentive and as many blog posts as you

possibly can simply because if you're

part of my group you're definitely

creating some sort of product or service

in the future

if you don't already have one and having

a list of potential customers is so

valuable it's such an overlooked asset

by a lot of bloggers and it's a shame

because having an email list just kind

of gives you that boost to making more

sales element number three you need to

have an engaging headline and

introduction now as far as the headlines

are concerned I recommend trying to find

some good keywords you can do that

simply by using Google's keyword planner

but the important thing here is just not

http://www.seoservicesdelhi.co.in

to make it so dry there's somebody dry

headlines out there on blogs and because

of the mass number of blogs that exist

nowadays it just kind of looks a little

boring so spice it up a little bit throw

your personality in there don't be shy

and definitely try to get a keyword in

there that can help you stand out as far

as SEO is concerned the second part of

that is just to make sure you have a

really great introduction so most times

when people hop on your blog and they

see your blog posts you have about you

know two or three seconds to really

capture their attention and make them

read the entire thing that's hard to do

if they're scrolling through Pinterest

and you're one of a thousand pins it's

going to be hard to capture their

attention and that introduction is what

really helps sell your blog post the

fourth element is simply having a short

summary within the post so a lot of us

are very busy when we pop onto your

blogs I have a lot of bloggers that I

love to read but I'm a busy woman I've

got a toddler running a business I want

to read your blog posts but it would

make it very easy on me if you simply

provided an easy summary so this could

be different bullet points or just a

short summary at the end but definitely

include it so that they can absorb the

information in as short a time as

possible if they really have to the

fifth thing I recommend is having what I

consider needy content so I hate when

somebody writes a blog post and it

sounds amazing and then you get there

and it's obvious that they wanted to

write the blog post but they just kind

of got tired or exhausted and it just

doesn't have a whole lot of meat to it

you know it doesn't have a whole lot of

value make sure you're providing a ton

of value and then also kind of break

things up by using bullet points or

different heading sizes to make it much

more visually appealing to anybody who

might be reading

the sixth element I recommend having is

a pinnable social media friendly graphic

if this is applicable to your niche so I

use Pinterest a lot simply because it's

very beneficial for me it's brought in a

lot of traffic you don't have to use

Pinterest but you should have an

appealing graphic in some way this is a

visual world and we love seeing graphics

that are beautiful or you know very

enticing and just kind of make us want

to stick around and read the content you

should definitely include one in every

single one of your posts the last

element I recommend is having any sort

of applicable

external links or interlinking between

your posts so just to clarify if you

have two different posts about budgeting

you would include a link to both of them

in either posts so this post would link

to that post and that post would link to

this post at the end or within any

portion of your blog posts you can say

hey if you're interested in this here is

a related post on XYZ and then you would

include a link to it there this is great

because it helps keep people on your

site longer but it also makes the job a

little bit easier for the reader so

maybe they love reading about budgeting

and they want to read all of your

ppc services in delhi

articles but they're on a smartphone or

a tablet and you know it would be harder

for them to try to find all of your blog

posts on that category make it easy for

them and just link to it within the post

so that wraps it up for this question I

hope this was helpful if you have

something in particular about blogging

or business that you'd like to see

please feel free to reach out to me

getting your emails is my favorite part

of the day so keep them coming I love to

hear from you guys and I will see

[bmthrive2018-blog]

Hor-Tel, Well...

In 1924, hotelier William Banks Hanner poured $1 million (roughly $13 million in today's dollars) into building a hotel in Los Angeles with an opulent marble lobby, stained-glass windows, and alabaster statues. His budding hospitality business seemed like a sure thing. Unfortunately, the Great Depression was right around the corner. In the decades to follow, the hotel and its surrounding area slowly declined. 

By 1931, the hotel had seen its first suicide: W.K. Norton, whose body was discovered beside a pile of poison capsules and in 1937, 25-year-old Grace E. Magro became the fourth person to die at the hotel when she fell from the ninth story, her body tangled in telephone wires. Police were unable to determine whether it was suicide, an accident, or something more insidious. One of the more heartbreaking incidents came in 1944, when a young woman gave birth in a hotel room and threw her newborn out of the window in a panic. But the Cecil's first foray into crime history came in 1947, when Elizabeth Short (also known as the Black Dahlia) was allegedly spotted having a drink at the hotel days before her murder. This story is in dispute, but it's worth mentioning if only for its popularity. But even if you toss out the Black Dahlia connection, it's not the only notorious true crime case embedded in the Cecil Hotel's history.

Richard Ramirez (better known as the Night Stalker) was the terror of coastal California from April 1984 to August 1985. In less than a year and a half, he murdered no fewer than 38 people, ages 9 to 83, in a killing spree that spread all the way from Orange County to San Francisco and when he was operating in Los Angeles, his base of operations was the Cecil Hotel. He even disposed of evidence, including bloody clothes, in the hotel's dumpster.

The Night Stalker has pretty high name recognition — and his crimes were particularly heinous — but the story of Jack Unterweger has another particularly creepy wrinkle. An Austrian serial killer, he committed his first murder in his home country in 1974 and was convicted and sentenced for his crime. About 10 years later, he released a memoir entitled "Purgatory or the Trip to Jail: Report of a Guilty Man," which became a bestseller and helped convince officials he had reformed. After his release, in 1991, he checked into the Cecil to cover a story about street crime in Los Angeles. While he was in the city, three prostitutes were attacked and killed in a way that mirrored Unterweger's crime — and police were able to definitively tie the journalist to the murders.

In 2011, the proprietors of the Cecil Hotel attempted to shrug off their history by rebranding themselves and taking on a new name. But they weren't able to leave behind the horror. 21-year-old Canadian tourist Elisa Lam wasn't murdered, but her death is one of the most haunting in the building's history. In February 2013, an employee discovered her body floating in the water tanks on the hotel's roof.

The case was ruled an accidental drowning, but there are some very strange elements that cast the event in a less understandable light. For one thing, to get to the roof, Lam would have needed a staff key, which wasn't found with her body. Her cell phone was also mysteriously missing, both from her body and from her room. But the most disturbing aspect is the video. The night that Elisa Lam disappeared, a security camera in the elevator captured four minutes of extremely disturbing footage. She ducks into the elevator, crouches low as if hiding, presses herself up against the wall, and occasionally peeks out into the hallway as if looking for a pursuer. She pushes many buttons, but the elevator doesn't move, and the door remains open. At one point, she even steps out into the hallway and begins gesticulating as if speaking with someone — but nobody is there. Was there somebody just off camera? Was she experiencing a mental health crisis? At this point, there's no way to know but we know that everything is after all a business opportunity.

Task in Hand – You are the owner of the Cecil hotel and have decided to make profits out of the property in one or the other way. You have to utilize the property and reform it.

Deliverables:

A PPT of not more than 7 slides which includes:-

Name, Tagline and brief details of the New Business

Strategies to reform the property

HR Requirement

Brief Financials

Deadline: 10:30 pm tonight

Wish you all the best!

Note: Please refer to the google drive link provided for sample material.

Warm Regards,

Team Numen

[noiseartists]

UMBRELLA BURNING FESTIVAL: Italogaze from Rome

I was introduced to Umbrella Film Festival by Sara, their bass player. A pretty good one too!

We first connected around Japanese Shoegaze. I was looking for a Japanese translator to help collaboration with Japanese bands that had little English. After a few short and unfruitful contacts with various people, Sara kindly offered to help.

That was a year ago. We have since worked together on Shojoskip, Plant Cell, and have a few more things in store. We get along well and love Shoegaze. With Nicolas Piere Wardell, we are a team, contributors I love working with.

I did not know she also was a bass player in a band. One day, shyly, I was told so and was very impressed by what I heard. You should be too.

One thing is certain, her bass playing is very similar to mine, a mix of support and melodic lines, trying to find solutions, patterns and varying them. She plays better than I ever did, but the intention is still the same.

And the rest is at the same level, with various influences from great indie bands, mixed with their own approach. 

I invite you to discover Umbrella Film Festival, one of Italogaze best, through this collaboration where they present their music and themselves.

 THE BAND

Some history

"Our band’s birth dates back to 2012. However, our lineup has changed a lot so far.

Sara met Luca Barboni, our former guitarist who left the band shortly after Poems in Braille recording and started to play with the aim of forming a garage band (!). As former drummer Francesco Gangeri joined the band the shoegaze idea came in. Gradually we realized how bad we needed a voice and Edoardo joined too. In 2013 Francesco left the band and was substituted by Marco. Since then, we have been writing and playing a bunch of songs and finally put 5 of them in our first EP.

Our only regret is that we could not tour as much as we would have liked, for Luca left UBF. We have been doing literally anything so far to cope with this lack of shoegaze guitarists here in Rome (as a matter of fact we have been trying out like 20 guitarists so far!), at the moment we’re still trying so hard to find another guy to make guitar sound loud, fuzzy and not so guitar-ishly.

We have never given in to this loss, recently Edoardo has decided to put his hands on a guitar and start singing and playing until our man appears. We are still confident he will!"  

Band composition

The line up is:

Edoardo Lelli – vocals, guitar

Sara Massiah – bass

Marco Scarcelli – drums

"As said above, our songwriting process is deeply rooted in the rigging. Most of our songs, including Poems in Braille tracks, were created starting from an improvisation we had recorded (yes, we have a bad habit of recording basically any rehearsal we do).

We would listen to the recorded material later at home, isolate some interesting sections and study our single parts. Then the effective process is kick-started: it could take weeks, months or just a couple of rehearsals until each part is composed, lyrics are written and everything is fine-tuned and arranged as a whole.

However, this is not the only way we compose. Sometimes one of us steps into our cozy studio with some kind of draft, a good riff or vocal line in mind, so everyone starts playing along and if we still like it when we listen back home the song is launched.

Either way, it’s a meticulous process, each of us is quite hard to please and we definitely cannot stop until everyone is satisfied."

 Personal anecdotes…

"If you google UBF you can read of somebody who claims that our name has something to do with the murder of a prostitute, but please don’t trust him. We can say "it’s wrong!"

 Music that is important to them

"We have quite different music tastes. Obviously, we share the love for the 90s Shoegaze scene (Slowdive, MBV, Ride, Swervedriver, Pale Saints, Drop Nineteens etc.) and broadly for the 90s sound we grew up with (Smashing Pumpkins, The Verve, Nirvana, Placebo, Deftones, Foo fighters and so on).

However, Edoardo is more into the 80s alternative scene (The Cure, Joy Division, Bauhaus, Dead Can Dance, Cocteau Twins, Depeche Mode, The Smiths), experimental music (Brian Eno, William Basinksi, Harold Budd), Berlin years Bowie and songwriters (among which Nick Cave and David Sylvian), while Marco doesn’t mind Britpop bands as well as heavy stuff like Tool, SunnO))) and Einstürzende Neubauten.

As for Sara, recent dream-pop artists (The Bilinda butchers, Wild Nothing, Beach House, Radio Dept.) and various groovy-yet-not-that-pop bands are essential (i.e. The Smiths, Interpol, Warpaint, A Perfect Circle, Phoenix, The xx, Japandroids, just to name a few)."

 Why the name of the band?

"Marco: I guess Sara knows better where does the UBF name historically come from. I personally like to consider it a joyful refusal of protection from any kind of weather condition. If it's rainy, then let's get totally soaked. And when the sun hits... she'll be waiting.

Sara: If you really ask me, it came up randomly while I was making research for my Bachelor’s degree thesis. I’ve been studying as a Japanese linguist, so one day I came into this photography book and while flipping through I read about some kind of traditional local festival they hold in Kanagawa prefecture, which is called Soga no Kasayaki Matsuri (namely, the Soga’s Umbrella Burning Festival).

They commemorate a historical event, the attempted murder of a feudal landlord by two young warriors belonging to the powerful Soga family whose father had been deposed. It was a matter of honor, so the two brothers were busted and taken to death but at the same time, their act was seen as a supreme gesture of filial piety. That night, on their way to the landlord’s shelter in the woods, they had burnt their paper umbrellas as to light up their way, therefore it seems that every year since then the local community celebrates by making a huge pile of colorful paper umbrellas which they burn at nightfall in the fourth Saturday of July.

Actually, this medieval revenge story has quite nothing to do with shoegaze music, but I found the photo of those burning umbrellas pretty evocative and fascinating. I showed it to my band fellows and we agreed upon this curious name.  "

 WHAT is your music about?

"Marco: I guess the sound part, detached from lyrics, is about contexts, and space/time. I really like when guitars don't actually sound like guitars. We rig up a lot when we meet and play, so we are just stuck and focused on what's going on in that particular moment, and we crave to do what seems to be magic instead of just what has to be done. We are looking for a giant, howling, and yet invisible ghost. We know it knows that we are there, the only way to catch it is to record its voice.

Sara: Well, about that ghost… I guess some of us just call it creativity. Rather than specific messages or stories, our aim is to suggest some kind of emotional landscape. While playing, we are constantly trying to reach a particular climax, which doesn’t necessarily mean the wall of sound (well, it does mean that more than often though). It’s some kind of emotional peak, the release of something we probably could not express any other way.

We like to think that our audience, especially those longtime Shoegaze fans, are able to grasp it and relate, but personally, I consider this aspect a nice side effect better than a specific aim of the songwriting process. Our music is a pure expression, secondarily the more can relate to the product, the better.

Edoardo: Sara has already said it perfectly: our aim is to set up emotional landscapes. Apart from that, a peculiar aspect of our work is that there's often something hidden or intentionally left unclear so that the listener can give its own meaning to the music or to the lyrics. I guess this is some kind of natural approach to us, as we tend to use ourselves as the test subjects to the evocative power of our songs.

Talking about lyrics writing process, what I'm always looking for is to go beyond the limits and create some reaction in a hypothetical listener. More than telling stories, images depicting. The verses I prefer are the ones where sensitivity and fury collide giving birth to something different, could it be bittersweet or fascinatingly disgusting. I think As Everything Falls Apart is a good example of this approach."

 THE MUSIC

Why we like them

The influences: Pale Saint, Ride, My Bloody Valentine! All drips into UBF' music.

The basslines: The line on Losing myself again is a killer, and the rest is as good

The voice: It is rare in Shoegaze and Dream Pop to hear powerful yet melodic voices. Edoardo pulls this out beautifully.

 Poems in Braille, EP, May 2016

1. Intro  02:14

"We were looking for a short track to work as an introduction to both the mood and the sonic landscape of the EP. We just wanted it to tell the listener something like “This is where we’re going to be for the next 20 minutes. So get ready and let yourself go.” We’re very satisfied with the result, as we think we’ve reached that aim pretty well."

This intro brings a vast palette of sounds. Some part reminds me of Ride's Grasshopper, some of some Japanese bands. A great introduction for the listener.

2. Track 5  02:52

"Track 5 is Umbrella Burning Festival’s take on the classic Shoegaze song: it’s straightforward, melodic, blurry and psychedelic. It’s a bad trip, both musically and lyrically."

This song reminds me of the first Pale Saints album, Comfort of Madness. Edoardo vocals are on par with Ian Masters. The title, track 5, for the second song is quite nice as it misleads the listener.

3. Stargazer  05:24

"When thinking of Stargazer an image always comes to mind: floating in space. Sonically speaking, this song places somewhere in between the space rock of The Verve's first album and the dream pop of Cocteau Twins."

The start of the song is also in the sonic universe of the same Pale Saints album. It is a calm song. It invites you to contemplate de sky full of stars, building tension slowly, without exploding. Subtle.

I love the title. In the 90's, I played often with a band called The SIgh. One of the best I heard. They had a song called Skygazer.

4. Losing Myself Again  05:12

"Losing Myself Again is a bipolar song. In the first part, with its in-your-face attitude, it's still lucid; in the second part, where it's pure chaos, it goes completely crazy."

This song has one of the best basslines I know: round, powerful. It is like getting into a warm whirlpool of sound.

This song has psychedelic sire to it, in the way it pulls the listener into it, both physically and mentally, and keeps you there, happy in the sonic chaos you are surrounded by.

Edoardo's voice adds a great intensity to a song already intense in all the right ways. I love this song.

5. As Everything Falls Apart  07:30

"This is the most intense track in Poems in Braille. Its slow, sinuous pace is meant to be trance inductive as if it was conceived as the soundtrack of a collapse."

In 2017, my favorite album was Camille Claudel 's eponymous album. This song could belong in this album in so many ways: the sound, Edoardo's voice and voice melody that so much like Frederico's, the intensity and trance-inducing. To understand, just listen to the following song. It is difficult not to find similarities. Did I say they were my favorite album of 2017? Maybe a hint as to why I love UBF too.

 THE ENVIRONMENT

Tell us about the artists you have worked with

"We have had the pleasure to mix and master our EP at WAX Recording Studio in Rome, which is run by Alessio Pindinelli who happens to be the talented guitarist of La Casa al Mare. I guess many of you Shoegazers around the world know his band and we are really thankful to them."

 The band's presence on the web

Social media:

Facebook

YouTube

Listening / buying their music:

Bandcamp

Soundcloud

 Other bands

"Marco: I saw Human Colonies live set last year, and it was really good. Out of the ItaloGaze scene, I MUST recommend you all Musica Per Bambini, BRUUNO, and Lantern.

Sara: I absolutely agree upon Human Colonies. Then if you’re into alternative genres and don’t mind some Italian vocals I would say Verdena is a good band to discover. I grew up as a teenager and a musician with their music. Their second album (Solo un grande sasso, 2001) has some Shoegaze influences too. And if you’re looking for something closer to the shoegaze classics, with lyrics in English and sharp riffs, my suggestion is In Her Eye. Even though I’ve discovered them not long ago I love their works (especially Borderline, 2015). I’m looking forward to their upcoming release (Change, off on June 1st) since I’ve listened to the launching single Closer to me.

Edoardo: Speaking of Italian music, I would suggest Verdena (especially Solo un grande sasso), our friends La Casa al Mare (This Astro is such a great album – listen to M and tell me I'm wrong!) and Port-Royal from Genova (I've listened to their 2009 album Dying in Time at least a thousand times!)."

 Thanks to

Our friends and families. Mervyn Peake. Modulated reverb. 2290.

[captainlenfan]

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You could have knocked us down with a feather when he told us that what was funding his financially independent lifestyle, was the EXACT same Amazon affiliate business that had been making us no more than £150 a month from home. He made no excuses when he went on to 'brag' about the fact that he was making SIX FIGURES a year totally 'hands-'off' using a system he had perfected to SKY-ROCKET his earnings...and he had been making that amount since the age of 19! After agreeing a 50-50 profit split we entered into a 6 month long training period with Matt (mostly via email), where he revealed to us a system that was so ridiculously simple that half way through we could have kicked ourselves for not 'catching on' a long time earlier. Still, we had agreed to stick to the 50-50 split for the 6months and so we kept our heads down and just watched in awe as our monthly commission cheques just got bigger and bigger. That was back in 2013, and since then we have gone on and further improved what he taught us, adding 1 killer secret which even he had not picked up on. In essence, we now also generate over £100,000 a year and have followed his 'lifestyle choice' of spending 6 months in the sun, albeit it further South in Europe! What you see here is possibly the only way you may ever come across to wipe out your debt and start 2018 in a much better place. Here's What You Get - When you buy this website I will pay for a domain name for you. I will register it in your own name so that you have full legal ownership, and I will then create you a 100% UNIQUELY DESIGNED wesbite. I will then open you a FREE Amazon Affiliate Account, and using the Amazon codes that I will get from your account, I will fill your website with over £25,000 worth of stock - GUARANTEED! The stock will be supplied by officially authorised Amazon Suppliers. When a client comes to your site and buys a product you DO NOTHING...The relevant officially authorised Amazon Supplier will process the order (as well as the payment), deal with 100% of the customer service and despatch the goods to the client. At the end of each 30 day period Amazon will PAY YOU between 4% and 8% of EVERYTHING SOLD on the site. How much does this equate to? Let's just say that equates to enough money to allow us to spend 6 months working from a South West facing terfface overlooking the Mediterrean Sea, on the Costa Blanca!!! No computer or website knowledge is needed to run this business. In 2009 I sarted a journey to find a way to work from home, due to personal reasons. Back then we knew nothing about designing a website, and due to advances in modern technology we STILL don't know how to write HTML code. BUT...We have perfected a way to work the hours we want, from anywhere we want which pays us a SIX FIGURE sum every year. And this is your opportunity to copy our success - Thanks to Matt, and a lot of hard work on our part, we have a BLUEPRINT for making money that is now as GOOD AS IT GETS! How You Earn £$ Making Money All you need to earn an income from this business is a FREE Amazon Associates account. If you do not have one then we will open one for you as part of our service. Thereafter, from the minute your site goes live you will earn between 4% and 8% of everything that sells, depending on your level of sales in the relevant 30 day period. You will be amazed at how quickly this income builds as your site remains OPEN FOR BUSINESS 24/7, 365 days a year! Your Site Name Domain Name Is FREE The cost of your domain name is included in the price you pay. You will be the legal owner of the site, and in 12 months time you will be able renew the domain name at a very small cost (approx. £10 per anum). Order Process When Somebody Buys From Your Website When a client places an order you do NOTHING. The approved Amazon supplier will handle the order from start to finish, and everything from product depstach, through to customer service will be handled without you being involved in any way - this is a 100% HANDS-OFF way to make money. On-Going Costs One TINY Monthly Cost There is only 1 on-going cost - and that is for the hosting of your website business. From just £6 a month you can be making THOUSANDS A MONTH in a relatively short time. There are no tie-ins or contracts, because I am so confident that you will CHOOSE to stay with me for a long time to come, such are the financial returns from this business. If you host Annually then you only pay for 8 months and get 4 months FREE (referred to in the listing header). *Hosting is non-refundable once the sites go live... Skills Required? ZERO Technical Skills Needed If you can't turn a computer on and login to your email then this may not be for you, because you will have to know how to login to your Amazon account and check your commissions etc. But as for updating the site NOTHING IS REQUIRED by you. If you have any knowledge of HTML or website design then it will make NO DIFFERENCE, because you don't need it. How Long To Go Live? Less Than 24 Hours To Being LIVE! That's my price promise - No matter what time of the day you order, even if it is on a weekend - I GUARANTEE to have you ready to make money within 24 hours of your order! Google Traffic Get Into Google Within 72 Hours Having a website is just the start - After years of crafting my trade I now know how to get brand new sites INDEXED in Google within 72 hours - and being indexed is the ONLY way to get Organic traffic. So, if you're in a hurry to make money then I am the ONLY person on EBay who can do this! FREE 2nd Site FREE SECOND SITE Why own ONE business when you can have TWO for the same price? Staying ahead of the curve and offering a service which nobody online can surpass is what I aim to do - and that is why I am offering you a STAGGERING opportunity to get THIS SITE plus any other site in my EBay store ABSOLUTELY FREE - Call it a permanent BUY ONE GET ONE FREE! Adsense Ready Earn Money Purely From CLICKS My sites are 100% Adsense ready, and having Adsense means that your visitors can make you money even if they buy NOTHING - A simple click on a Google ad on your site can earn you money. If you have an existing Google Adsense account, I'll even add it to this site for you! Join The Best I Am Officially One Of EBay's BEST! It matters who you do business with, and you cannot enter into a safer transaction than with someone who has proven themselves HUNDREDS of times before - This is TOTALLY RISK FREE for you! Refunds 30 Day TOTAL Satisfaction GUARANTEE Only the best sellers on EBay can offer a NO-QUIBBLE full money back guarantee. It is my genuine opinion that the chances of you asking for a refund are 1 out of 1000. This is a MONEY MAKING opportunity - why would ANYONE ask for a refund it if 'did what it said on the tin'...WHICH THIS DOES! Want To Sell It On? Make £$500-£$1000 In 2 Months... I do 95% of my business on a site not connected to EBay, where I sell my sites for between £500 and £1000 - The only 'Caveat' is that a site needs to be 'searchable' in Google before you can do this. I will show you how to get this site indexed within 72 hours, and I will then show you where to FLIP the site ('Flip'means to sell it for INSTANT PROFITS) for at least ten times the price you pay here. Work In A Garden Shed! Work ANYWHERE - Just Log In!!! There actually is no 'work' as such, all you ever need to do is log into your Amazon or Adsense accounts and see what you have made. One day it may be $£5, another it may be $£500...DOES IT MATTER if it's running on auto? READ THIS!!! This is NOT Get Rich Quick It took us a few years to perfect this system, if you do NOTHING to promote your site then on pure auto do not expect more than £150 a month from it. £150 a month WILL NOT get you rich. We will show you what to do to MASSIVELY maximise what you earn. It's simple, it's fast and it's profitable!!! Can I Have A US Site? Of Course! We have many hundreds of clients, and from all over the World. If you are US based then the site will be built for the US market. Products will be shipped from within the US and all products will be priced in US$. Adding Products Got Your Own Products? The site will come with tens of thousands of pounds worth of stock already on it, ready to be shipped by Amazon. But if you want to add your own products to the site then you can - Very easily. I have even installed PayPal so that clients can pay instantly for your products. OFFER ONLY FOR THE 1ST 20 CLIENTS IN FEBRUARYHURRY!!!Buy 1 Get 1 FREE! ..."The Offer To Kill Off The Competition And Make You MONEY!..." FULLY STOCKED MOTORBIKE GEAR WEBSITE Business|FREE Domain|Hosting|Traffic  ..."The ONLY Genuine Opportunity On EBay"...Buy 1 Site And Get 1 FREETop Rated EBay SellerNO Hidden Costs - EVER!Start Earning TODAY!This is an AUTO-RUNNING fully stocked website from which you will earn commissions purely for being a MIDDLE-MAN - No stock to buy...No strings attachedGo Into Business With Me And Get A 2nd BusinessTotally FREE OF CHARGE  "...See VERIFIED Income Proof Below?..."Host Your Site With Me And Within 7 Days I GUARANTEE Google Page 1 ResultsThis offer Alone Is Worth $3,000 This is the final piece of the puzzle - How to get traffic to your sites, and how to get to the top of Google quickly. NO OTHER EBay business can offer this, becaue the copy-cats will never work out just how I do this. Host your site with me (Trump Hosting), and I will get you onto the first page of Google within 7 days of delivering your sites. I will do it for ONE site and then give you the COPY/PASTE steps to do it for your 2nd - No serets held back, just go through 2019 knowing that you really have found THE GAME CHANGER. ​​​​​​​ When you know how to dominate Google in under 24 hours you are not just a PLAYER in the game, you OWN the game. Just think how valuable just this knowledge alone is going to be to you - Take a look at the results for yourself. One of my own products, which makes me over $93.50 per sale sitting on PAGE 1 of Google less than 15 HOURS after I hit the button. If you have followed my success over the years then you will know one thing - this is A GAME CHANGER! ​​​​​​​This offer is limited to the first 30 clients this month. "...Did You Know AMAZON Pay Out MILLIONS In Commissions Every Year To Owners of Automated Websites Just Like These?..." "...All You Need Is A Wordpress Site - A FREE Amazon Affiliate Account - And A Bank Account To Receive Your Monthly commissions...""...This is NOT Get Rich Quick - It Is Possibly The Most GENUINE Opportunity To Earn Passive Income Online You Will Ever Know Without Having To Take Your Clothes Off!!!... ...And What Is Even Better Is That If You Buy This Site You Can Choose ANY Other And Get It FREE OF CHARGE!"A Work From Home Business With No Stock To Pay For - The Website Updates All Stock Levels And Prices Automatically. ..."Look At The Following Sample Sites - My Work Is WORLD-CLASS..." Bike Shop - Delivered To A Client In The UK - 3rd December 2017.EARNINGS IN JANUAY 2019$355.49 PROFIT In Her Second Month!Herbal Site - Delivered To A Client In France - 11th August 2017.EARNINGS IN DECEMBER 2018$1658.94 PROFIT In His Fourth Month!CCTV Site - Delivered To A Client In The UK - 17th September 2017.EARNINGS IN FEBRUARY 2018$2377.86 PROFIT In His Sixth Month!Hair Extension Site - Delivered To A Client In The UK - 2nd June 2018EARNINGS IN JAUARY 2019$3309.63 PROFIT In Her Eigth Month!Male Grooming Site - Delivered To A Client In The US - 22nd May 2017.EARNINGS IN MARCH 2018$6109.29 PROFIT In His Tenth Month! ..."You Can Buy A Site Cheaper On EBay Because Some Sellers Think Cheap Is The Way To Go - BUT......" ..."Feedbacks Left Since July 20th 2018...CHECK THEM YOURSELF..." Without much hesitation we both agreed that for the tiny investment it was worth a shot, as neither of us wanted to go back to 'work' for a living. It took us 9 weeks of study before we made our first £50 online, and then continued to make a small amount for another 4 months...And then something happened that literally changed our World. While on holiday in France, we got talking to a young 22 year old young guy from Rochdale who was living the good life in a Penthouse overlooking the beautiful Mediterranean sea. You could have knocked us down with a feather when he told us that what was funding his financially independent lifestyle, was the EXACT same Amazon affiliate business that had been making us no more than £150 a month from home. He made no excuses when he went on to 'brag' about the fact that he was making SIX FIGURES a year totally 'hands-'off' using a system he had perfected to SKY-ROCKET his earnings...and he had been making that amount since the age of 19! After agreeing a 50-50 profit split we entered into a 6 month long training period with Matt (mostly via email), where he revealed to us a system that was so ridiculously simple that half way through we could have kicked ourselves for not 'catching on' a long time earlier. Still, we had agreed to stick to the 50-50 split for the 6months and so we kept our heads down and just watched in awe as our monthly commission cheques just got bigger and bigger. Hi, my name is Anna and in 2009 my husband (Chris, pictured at the top)  and I found ourselves in desparate need of a way to replace BOTH of our salaries after being made redundant after the property crash in the UK. After trying everything from Network Marketing, to importing Chinese rubbish and trying to sell it on for a profit, we were on the edge of giving up hope and accepting 'dead-end' jobs that would keep us stuck in the rat-race for years. And then in late 2012, I read about Amazon affiliate marketing on an Internet blog, aimed at people who were looking for ways to get out of the rut.That was back in 2013, and since then we have gone on and further improved what he taught us, adding 1 killer secret which even he had not picked up on. In essence, we now also generate over £100,000 a year and have followed his 'lifestyle choice' of spending 6 months in the sun, albeit it further South in Europe! What you see here is possibly the only way you may ever come across to wipe out your debt and start 2018 in a much better place. Here's What You Get - When you buy this website I will pay for a domain name for you. I will register it in your own name so that you have full legal ownership, and I will then create you a 100% UNIQUELY DESIGNED wesbite. I will then open you a FREE Amazon Affiliate Account, and using the Amazon codes that I will get from your account, I will fill your website with over £25,000 worth of stock -  GUARANTEED!  The stock will be supplied by officially authorised Amazon Suppliers. When a client comes to your site and buys a product you DO NOTHING...The relevant officially authorised Amazon  Supplier will process the order (as well as the payment), deal with 100% of the customer service and despatch the goods to the client. At the end of each 30 day period Amazon will PAY YOU between 4% and 8% of EVERYTHING SOLD on the site. How much does this equate to? Let's just say that equates to enough money to allow us to spend 6 months working from a South West facing terfface overlooking the Mediterrean Sea, on the Costa Blanca!!!No computer or website knowledge is needed to run this business. In 2009 I sarted a journey to find a way to work from home, due to personal reasons. Back then we knew nothing about designing a website, and due to advances in modern technology we STILL don't know how to write HTML code. BUT...We have perfected a way to work the hours we want, from anywhere we want which pays us a SIX FIGURE sum every year. And this is your opportunity to copy our success - Thanks to Matt, and a lot of hard work on our part, we have a BLUEPRINT for making money that is now as GOOD AS IT GETS!​​​​​​I AM THE MOST TRUSTED WEBSITE BUSINESS SELLER ON EBAY - BUY WITH TOTAL CONFIDENCE FULLY STOCKED MOTORBIKE GEAR WEBSITE Business|FREE Domain|Hosting|Traffic Here's EVERYTHING You Need To Know - All The Questions I Would Ask If I Were YOUHow You Earn £$Making Money All you need to earn an income from this business is a FREE Amazon Associates account. If you do not have one then we will open one for you as part of our service. Thereafter, from the minute your site goes live you will earn between 4% and 8% of everything that sells, depending on your level of sales in the relevant 30 day period. You will be amazed at how quickly this income builds as your site remains OPEN FOR BUSINESS 24/7, 365 days a year!Your Site Name Domain Name Is FREE The cost of your domain name is included in the price you pay. You will be the legal owner of the site, and in 12 months time you will be able renew the domain name at a very small cost (approx. £10 per anum).Order Process When Somebody Buys From Your Website When a client places an order you do NOTHING. The approved Amazon supplier will handle the order from start to finish, and everything from product depstach, through to customer service will be handled without you being involved in any way - this is a 100% HANDS-OFF way to make money.On-Going Costs One TINY Monthly Cost There is only 1 on-going cost - and that is for the hosting of your website business. From UNDER £6 a month you can be making THOUSANDS A MONTH in a relatively short time. There are no tie-ins or contracts, because I am so confident that you will CHOOSE to stay with me for a long time to come, such are the financial returns from this business. If you host Annually then you only pay for 8 months and get 4 months FREE (referred to in the listing header). *Hosting is non-refundable once the sites go live...Please ONLY buy this website if you accept that you will need to use my hosting service...It works out at just 20p a day to have full 7 day week supportSkills Required? ZERO Technical Skills Needed If you can't turn a computer on and login to your email then this may not be for you, because you will have to know how to login to your Amazon account and check your commissions etc. But as for updating the site NOTHING IS REQUIRED by you. If you have any knowledge of HTML or website design then it will make NO DIFFERENCE, because you don't need it.How Long To Go Live? Less Than 24 Hours To Being LIVE! That's my price promise - No matter what time of the day you order, even if it is on a weekend - I GUARANTEE to have you ready to make money within 24 hours of your order!Google Traffic Get Into Google Within 72 Hours Having a website is just the start - After years of crafting my trade I now know how to get brand new sites INDEXED in Google within 72 hours - and being indexed is the ONLY way to get Organic traffic. So, if you're in a hurry to make money then I am the ONLY person on EBay who can do this! Also, as soon as you approve the finished sites by mutually swapping feedback I will get the Google page 1 result system triggered (mentioned at the top of the listing). FREE 2nd Site FREE SECOND SITE Why own ONE business when you can have TWO for the same price? Staying ahead of the curve and offering a service which nobody online can surpass is what I aim to do - and that is why I am offering you a STAGGERING opportunity to get THIS SITE plus any other site in my EBay store ABSOLUTELY FREE - Call it a permanent BUY ONE GET ONE FREE!Adsense Ready Earn Money Purely From CLICKS My sites are 100% Adsense ready, and having Adsense means that your visitors can make you money even if they buy NOTHING - A simple click on a Google ad on your site can earn you money. If you have an existing Google Adsense account, I'll even add it to this site for you!Join The Best I Am Officially One Of EBay's BEST! It matters who you do business with, and you cannot enter into a safer transaction than with someone who has proven themselves HUNDREDS of times before - This is TOTALLY RISK FREE for you!Refunds  30 Day TOTAL Satisfaction GUARANTEE Only the best sellers on EBay can offer a NO-QUIBBLE full money back guarantee. It is my genuine opinion that the chances of you asking for a refund are 1 out of 1000. This is a MONEY MAKING opportunity - why would ANYONE ask for a refund it if 'did what it said on the tin'...WHICH THIS DOES! ​​​​​​​ Want To Sell It On? Make £$500-£$1000 In 2 Months... I do 95% of my business on a site not connected to EBay, where I sell my sites for between £500 and £1000 - The only 'Caveat' is that a site needs to be 'searchable' in Google before you can do this. I will show you how to get this site indexed within 72 hours, and I will then show you where to FLIP the site ('Flip'means to sell it for INSTANT PROFITS) for at least ten times the price you pay here.Work In A Garden Shed! Work ANYWHERE - Just Log In!!! There actually is no 'work' as such, all you ever need to do is log into your Amazon or Adsense accounts and see what you have made. One day it may be $£5, another it may be $£500...DOES IT MATTER if it's running on auto?READ THIS!!!  This is NOT Get Rich Quick It took us a few years to perfect this system, if you do NOTHING to promote your site then on pure auto do not expect more than £150 a month from it. £150 a month WILL NOT get you rich. We will show you what to do to MASSIVELY maximise what you earn. It's simple, it's fast and it's profitable!!!Can I Have A US Site? Of Course! We have many hundreds of clients, and from all over the World. If you are US based then the site will be built for the US market. Products will be shipped from within the US and all products will be priced in US$.Adding Products Got Your Own Products? The site will come with tens of thousands of pounds worth of stock already on it, ready to be shipped by Amazon. But if you want to add your own products to the site then you can - Very easily. I have even installed PayPal so that clients can pay instantly for your products.300 Hits A Day When you buy I will send you a .pdf which will show you how I generate around 300 visitors a day to every new site I launch - It is easy to do, and works - every time. All you have to do is foloow the A-B-C instructions. This is what I refer to in the listing above - a simple way to get into a very lucrative business. I'm a paragraph. Simply double click here to add your own text and edit me. It's easy. Describe your product. Mention details and specifications that you believe are relevant to your buyers.100% GUARANTEED! FULLY STOCKED MOTORBIKE GEAR WEBSITE Business|FREE Domain|Hosting|Traffic See our other items FULLY STOCKED MOTORBIKE GEAR WEBSITE Business|FREE Domain|Hosting|Traffic Click to see full description..."Start Today - If You Have An Interest In The Product Then Why Not Make Money At The Same Time..."​​​​​​​Note to EBay - 2 ROYALTY FREE images (from Pexels) have been used in this listing, in accordance with the instructions given to me by EBay in our officially recorded chat reference SR# 1-139529513637 - December 10th 2017 Hi, my name is Anna and in 2009 my husband and I found ourselves in desparate need of a way to replace BOTH of our salaries after being made redundant after the property crash in the UK. After trying everything from Network Marketing, to importing Chinese rubbish and trying to sell it on for a profit, we were on the edge of giving up hope and accepting 'dead-end' jobs that would keep us stuck in the rat-race for years. And then in late 2012, I read about Amazon affiliate marketing on an Internet blog, aimed at people who were looking for ways to get out of the rut. Without much hesitation we both agreed that for the tiny investment it was worth a shot, as neither of us wanted to go back to 'work' for a living. It took us 9 weeks of study before we made our first £50 online, and then continued to make a small amount for another 4 months...And then something happened that literally changed our World. While on holiday in France, we got talking to a young 22 year old young guy from Rochdale who was living the good life in a Penthouse overlooking the beautiful Mediterranean sea. You could have knocked us down with a feather when he told us that what was funding his financially independent lifestyle, was the EXACT same Amazon affiliate business that had been making us no more than £150 a month from home.   He made no excuses when he went on to 'brag' about the fact that he was making SIX FIGURES a year totally 'hands-'off' using a system he had perfected to SKY-ROCKET his earnings...and he had been making that amount since the age of 19! After agreeing a 50-50 profit split we entered into a 6 month long training period with Matt (mostly via email), where he revealed to us a system that was so ridiculously simple that half way through we could have kicked ourselves for not 'catching on' a long time earlier. Still, we had agreed to stick to the 50-50 split for the 6months and so we kept our heads down and just watched in awe as our monthly commission cheques just got bigger and bigger. That was back in 2013, and since then we have gone on and further improved what he taught us, adding 1 killer secret which even he had not picked up on. In essence, we now also generate over £100,000 a year and have followed his 'lifestyle choice' of spending 6 months in the sun, albeit it further South in Europe! What you see here is possibly the only way you may ever come across to wipe out your debt and start 2018 in a much better place.   Here's What You Get - When you buy this website I will pay for a domain name for you. I will register it in your own name so that you have full legal ownership, and I will then create you a 100% UNIQUELY DESIGNED wesbite. I will then open you a FREE Amazon Affiliate Account, and using the Amazon codes that I will get from your account, I will fill your website with over £25,000 worth of stock -  GUARANTEED!  The stock will be supplied by officially authorised Amazon Suppliers. When a client comes to your site and buys a product you DO NOTHING...The relevant officially authorised Amazon  Supplier will process the order (as well as the payment), deal with 100% of the customer service and despatch the goods to the client. At the end of each 30 day period Amazon will PAY YOU between 4% and 8% of EVERYTHING SOLD on the site. How much does this equate to? Let's just say that equates to enough money to allow us to spend 6 months working from a South West facing terfface overlooking the Mediterrean Sea, on the Costa Blanca!!! No computer or website knowledge is needed to run this business. In 2009 I sarted a journey to find a way to work from home, due to personal reasons. Back then we knew nothing about designing a website, and due to advances in modern technology we STILL don't know how to write HTML code. BUT...We have perfected a way to work the hours we want, from anywhere we want which pays us a SIX FIGURE sum every year. And this is your opportunity to copy our success - Thanks to Matt, and a lot of hard work on our part, we have a BLUEPRINT for making money that is now as GOOD AS IT GETS!   How You Earn £$ Making Money All you need to earn an income from this business is a FREE Amazon Associates account. If you do not have one then we will open one for you as part of our service. Thereafter, from the minute your site goes live you will earn between 4% and 8% of everything that sells, depending on your level of sales in the relevant 30 day period. You will be amazed at how quickly this income builds as your site remains OPEN FOR BUSINESS 24/7, 365 days a year!   Your Site Name Domain Name Is FREE The cost of your domain name is included in the price you pay. You will be the legal owner of the site, and in 12 months time you will be able renew the domain name at a very small cost (approx. £10 per anum).   Order Process When Somebody Buys From Your Website When a client places an order you do NOTHING. The approved Amazon supplier will handle the order from start to finish, and everything from product depstach, through to customer service will be handled without you being involved in any way - this is a 100% HANDS-OFF way to make money.   On-Going Costs One TINY Monthly Cost There is only 1 on-going cost - and that is for the hosting of your website business. From just £6 a month you can be making THOUSANDS A MONTH in a relatively short time. There are no tie-ins or contracts, because I am so confident that you will CHOOSE to stay with me for a long time to come, such are the financial returns from this business. If you host Annually then you only pay for 8 months and get 4 months FREE (referred to in the listing header). *Hosting is non-refundable once the sites go live...   Skills Required? ZERO Technical Skills Needed If you can't turn a computer on and login to your email then this may not be for you, because you will have to know how to login to your Amazon account and check your commissions etc. But as for updating the site NOTHING IS REQUIRED by you. If you have any knowledge of HTML or website design then it will make NO DIFFERENCE, because you don't need it.   How Long To Go Live? Less Than 24 Hours To Being LIVE! That's my price promise - No matter what time of the day you order, even if it is on a weekend - I GUARANTEE to have you ready to make money within 24 hours of your order!   Google Traffic Get Into Google Within 72 Hours Having a website is just the start - After years of crafting my trade I now know how to get brand new sites INDEXED in Google within 72 hours - and being indexed is the ONLY way to get Organic traffic. So, if you're in a hurry to make money then I am the ONLY person on EBay who can do this!   FREE 2nd Site FREE SECOND SITE Why own ONE business when you can have TWO for the same price? Staying ahead of the curve and offering a service which nobody online can surpass is what I aim to do - and that is why I am offering you a STAGGERING opportunity to get THIS SITE plus any other site in my EBay store ABSOLUTELY FREE - Call it a permanent BUY ONE GET ONE FREE!   Adsense Ready Earn Money Purely From CLICKS My sites are 100% Adsense ready, and having Adsense means that your visitors can make you money even if they buy NOTHING - A simple click on a Google ad on your site can earn you money. If you have an existing Google Adsense account, I'll even add it to this site for you!   Join The Best I Am Officially One Of EBay's BEST! It matters who you do business with, and you cannot enter into a safer transaction than with someone who has proven themselves HUNDREDS of times before - This is TOTALLY RISK FREE for you!   Refunds 30 Day TOTAL Satisfaction GUARANTEE Only the best sellers on EBay can offer a NO-QUIBBLE full money back guarantee. It is my genuine opinion that the chances of you asking for a refund are 1 out of 1000. This is a MONEY MAKING opportunity - why would ANYONE ask for a refund it if 'did what it said on the tin'...WHICH THIS DOES!    Want To Sell It On? Make £$500-£$1000 In 2 Months... I do 95% of my business on a site not connected to EBay, where I sell my sites for between £500 and £1000 - The only 'Caveat' is that a site needs to be 'searchable' in Google before you can do this. I will show you how to get this site indexed within 72 hours, and I will then show you where to FLIP the site ('Flip'means to sell it for INSTANT PROFITS) for at least ten times the price you pay here.   Work In A Garden Shed! Work ANYWHERE - Just Log In!!! There actually is no 'work' as such, all you ever need to do is log into your Amazon or Adsense accounts and see what you have made. One day it may be $£5, another it may be $£500...DOES IT MATTER if it's running on auto?   READ THIS!!! This is NOT Get Rich Quick It took us a few years to perfect this system, if you do NOTHING to promote your site then on pure auto do not expect more than £150 a month from it. £150 a month WILL NOT get you rich. We will show you what to do to MASSIVELY maximise what you earn. It's simple, it's fast and it's profitable!!!   Can I Have A US Site? Of Course! We have many hundreds of clients, and from all over the World. If you are US based then the site will be built for the US market. Products will be shipped from within the US and all products will be priced in US$.   Adding Products Got Your Own Products? The site will come with tens of thousands of pounds worth of stock already on it, ready to be shipped by Amazon. But if you want to add your own products to the site then you can - Very easily. I have even installed PayPal so that clients can pay instantly for your products. Read the full article

[rxngikumxtsumoto-blog]

really  LONG  CHARACTER  SURVEY.

RULES.  repost ,   don’t  reblog  !    tag  10  ! TAGGED. @ichimaru-gin TAGGING.   If you haven’t yet, please feel free to!

BASICS.

FULL  NAME :  Rangiku Matsumoto NICKNAME :   I have no idea, but probably something with boobs...boobzilla? loool AGE :   I have no idea again lool but at least 200 I would say, who knows since you know, Kubo doesn’t age his characters all the time, so who knows?? BIRTHDAY :   September 29 (gifted to her by Gin) ETHNIC  GROUP :   To me, she appears of European or Russian descent but she only speaks Japanese so......  NATIONALITY :   Japanese (as far as I know) LANGUAGE / S :   Japanese SEXUAL  ORIENTATION :   Heterosexual ROMANTIC  ORIENTATION :   Heteroromantic RELATIONSHIP  STATUS :   It’s complicated but she is devoted to Gin (doesn’t mean she doesn’t flirt, however) CLASS :   Warrior Class??? HOME  TOWN / AREA :    Rukongai CURRENT  HOME :   Squad 10 barracks or Gin’s home PROFESSION :   Lieutenant of the 10th Division

PHYSICAL.

HAIR :   Gold/blonde. I know in the anime they make her more of a strawberry blonde but I think she’s more blonde than that.... EYES :   Steely blue, a good reflection of her zanpakuto NOSE :   She has what the Japanese refer to as a ‘tall’ or ‘high’ nose, meaning that she has a tall bridge of her nose, a defining characteristic of Japanese ideal of Western beauty FACE :     She has an almost almond-shaped face with a sharp chin LIPS :   Her lips are full and pouty, with a slightly fuller lower lip  COMPLEXION :  She has lighter skin but seems to also sport a healthy glow to her skin, perhaps from her time out on the field BLEMISHES :   None SCARS :   None, surprisingly enough, given she had her entire side ripped out and was later nearly killed again, but nope, no scars. The fourth division are good at what they do. TATTOOS :   None HEIGHT :   172 cm/5′7 1/2″ (she’s so tall gdi) WEIGHT :    57kg/126 lbs (someone needs to feed her) BUILD :   Very slender, with most of her weight residing in her large breasts. But despite her slim build she is very strong (such as blocking Nakeem’s stomp attack with her forearm while getting the news to release her seal) FEATURES : Always wearing a smile, small beauty mark on the right side under her lower lip ALLERGIES :   None USUAL  HAIR  STYLE :   Pre-zombification time her hair was long with bangs surrounding her face, but in recent chapters it is cut short around her face, barely hitting her shoulders USUAL  FACE  LOOK :   Usually always smiling, seemingly happy, unless she is in the middle of a battle USUAL  CLOTHING :    When she is in the soul society, she wears the black uniform with a pink obi and a chain around her neck. However, on her off days or when she goes to the human world, she tends to wear the latest fashion trends, favoring small skirts and extremely low-cut shirts.

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR / S :   Being alone, being vulnerable, her dreams ASPIRATION / S :   Live a happy life with the one(s) she cares about POSITIVE  TRAITS :   independent, strong, empathetic, compassionate, dependable, loving, good listener (even if she doesn’t always appear to be so), intuitive, forgiving, free-spirited, gentle NEGATIVE  TRAITS :   stubborn, lazy, obnoxious, heavy drinker, wears a mask to avoid getting close to people, has a difficult time making true friends, self-sacrificing, self-deprecating ZODIAC :   Libra (using her given birthdate, but her actual zodiac sign is unknown) TEMPEREMENT :    Comes off as being happy and carefree but is actually quite the pensive person SOUL  TYPE / S :    Warrior ANIMALS :   Cat VICE  HABIT / S :  Turning to alcohol whenever there is a problem she can’t solve FAITH :   I don’t think she believes in much of anything, especially after recent arks. How could a god let something like this happen? GHOSTS ? :   Well...she is a ghost technically... AFTERLIFE ? :  She lives it REINCARNATION ? : Shinigami work with this all the time ALIENS ? :   This doesn’t have much impact on anything the society does so she probably never thought about it POLITICAL  ALIGNMENT :   Lawful good?? maybe?  ECONOMIC  PREFERENCE :   She doesn’t need a lot of expensive things SOCIOPOLITICAL  POSITION :   Does feminist count? EDUCATION  LEVEL :   Academy graduate...pretty average but she does have a good fighting sense

FAMILY.

FATHER :   None MOTHER :   None SIBLINGS :  None EXTENDED  FAMILY :    None NAME  MEANING / S :    I had to go to google for this and i found two meanings for her name, both of which seem to oddly suit her. “Ran” = Chrysanthemum, “giku” = riot or war, or the other meaning “Ran” = orchid, “giku” = apprehension or uneasiness. I think the second one suits her better (and I think in one of the panels with her in it there’s an orchid on her desk? I could be wrong about this but aoidfansldfkn). Matusmoto is fairly common with “Matsu” = pine, fir tree, and “moto” = base, root origin. I think it is interesting to note here that pine trees in Japanese are a symbol of longevity, friendship, and constancy in the face of strife. Take what you will from that ^__~ HISTORICAL  CONNECTION ? :   Probably none

FAVORITES.

BOOK :   She doesn’t have much time to read but believe it or not I think she would enjoy books like Twilight (kill me now), or more likely romantic manga MOVIE :    Hm...probably something sappy or funny with a happy ending 5 SONGS :   Probably anything by Lights, or any upbeat and happy pop music DEITY :   Hahaha HOLIDAY :   Christmas MONTH :   Early April when the cherry blossoms first start blooming SEASON :   Spring PLACE :   The hut where she grew up with Gin, onsens, malls WEATHER :    The first breath of spring, surprise summer rains SOUND :   Gin’s voice, birds chirping early in the morning SCENT / S :    Spring flowers, warmth earth in the middle of summer TASTE / S :    sake warm and cold, dried persimmons, a new concoction that she cooks, omelette rice, Inuoe’s cooking, Gin’s cooking  FEEL / S :    Summer yukata fabric ANIMAL / S :    Cats, foxes NUMBER :  10 (for her squad, don’t judge her) COLORS :   Pink, black, light blue

EXTRA.

TALENTS :    She can get out of doing just about any work with the right words or the right wink in an unfortunate man’s direction (*cough*shuuhei*cough*), she can help pull people of out depressions far easier than she can pull herself out, she can drink just about anyone under the table, she is far too good at running away from her problems, and hiding her problems BAD  AT :   Being honest with her feelings, letting people get close enough to really get to know her, cooking, knowing when to stop drinking TURN  ONS :   The growly thing Gin’s voice does when he’s turned on, rough, passionate love making, the soft hitches of Gin’s breath, his fingers in her hair, the taste of his flesh, when she makes Gin lose control of his composure TURN  OFFS :   Talkative guys, arguments, crying (lbr, not much  Gin can do can turn Ran off) HOBBIES :   Cooking! she loves to try new concoctions and can’t for the life of her figure out why no one ever wants to eat her tuna and jam omelette. She certainly thought it tasted good. AESTHETIC  TAGS :    forests, moss and ivy on the side of old Japanese-style buildings, ikebana, light coming through trees, mori girls, sake sets GPOY  QUOTES :   "To know sorrow is not terrifying. What is terrifying is to know you can’t go back to happiness you could have.”

FC INFO.

MAIN  FC / S :   None ALT  FC / S :  None OLDER  FC / S :   None YOUNGER  FC / S :   None VOICE  CLAIM / S :   Kaya Matsutani GENDERBENT  FC / S :   None

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 :   if  you  could  write  your  character  your  way  in  their  own  movie ,   what  would  it  be  called ,  what  style  would  it  be  filmed  in ,  and  what  would  it  be  about ?          A1 :   I would have to say that she would be very good in a female empowerment movie as she overcomes the sexual expectations of the way that she dresses to kick ass.  But as a ginran lover, she would also be great in a romantic movie, perhaps one where she thinks him dead for years but in the end of the movie she is reunited with him and they live happily ever after. Q2 :   what  would  their  soundtrack / score  sound  like ?          A2 :   Probably something to the upbeat tracks but the lyrics would be much darker than what the music would lend the listener to believe (think Halsey or Melanie Martinez) Q3 :   why  did  you  start  writing  this  character ?          A3 :   Because SOMEBODY *cough*Jackie*cough* dragged me into her. I was playing a villain character before this one. In fact, in about 90% of my previous roleplays they have been evil kings, manslayers, and most recently Nutcracker from Tokyo Ghoul. ANYONE ELSE SEE A TREND??? But Jackie was searching for a Rangiku and I made a joke that I could make one for her and who knew that a year+ later I would still be here rping her.  Q4 :   what  first  attracted  you  to  this  character ?          A4 :   To be honest, I was always kind of indifferent towards her. Being a blonde and having blue eyes and fairly large breasts myself, I thought of her as just another overly-sexualized female character in a manga there only for the sexual humor. It wasn’t until I started really researching her to write her that I realized how wrong I was. Her duality in dealing with people, with her problems, and her inability to let people in was intriguing to me and still to this day she surprises me, which makes it fun to play her. Q5 :   describe  the  biggest  thing  you  dislike  about  your  muse.          A5 :   She doesn’t seem to realize just how many people care for her. It took her what, 80% of the manga, more than that? before she was able to communicate with her captain. She is seen suffering by herself rather than just going to talk to someone, and that’s frustrating as her roleplayer. She’s surprisingly bad at communicating with other people. Q6 :   what  do  you  have  in  common  with  your  muse ?          A6 :   I would much rather hide my feelings in favor of making another feel better. No matter how shitty a day I’m having, if I hear that one of my friends is having a worse one, I will forego my own mental health to listen to their problems (see Rangiku staying at Orihime’s place). I also have the ability to get free alcohol and favors from boys with the right...persuasions (lolol...am I kidding? who knows~). Q7 :   how  does  your  muse  feel  about  you ?          A7 : She wishes I would stop making painful AUs with Jackie and focus on getting her a stable home with Gin. And she also wishes I would stop writing such painful and deep threads and let her revert to having fun again (not gonna happen Bl). Q8 :   what  characters  does  your  muse  have  interesting  interactions  with ?        A8 :   Everyone is interesting! But it’s the ones that thrust her outside of her comfort zone that are really interesting! But, let’s be truthful, anyone willing to put up with my rollercoaster of a muse earns a big gold star and a 90 degree bow from me. Q9 :   what  gives  you  inspiration  to  write  your  muse ?         A9 :  Music, especially current pop hits or super sad, slow songs. Epic music or movie sound tracks are also really good, depending on what scene I’m writing. Q10 :   how  long  did  this  take  you  to  complete ?          A10 : Holy shit it’s been an hour, fck me.    

[windex-for-blood]

HUGEASS GET OUT SPOILERS

Seriously, keep scrolling

Gonna give this space.

It’s mostly genre wanking, not so much about race itself which was, y'know, the whole point of the film.

Anyway, the Armitages are fucking dumb. I’ve seen a ton of body-snatcher movies and their model is completely unsustainable. If you’re that intent on the whole “live forever by hopping bodies”, everybody know you take people who won’t be missed. The homeless and destitute.

But these stupid schmucks are out here grabbing people who are generating first-page Google results. Their last three victims are all connected in related searches, and as far as we know they were just regular people. Chris is a photographer whose work has been professionally recognized, and Rose’s sociopathic ass was looking to steal and NCAA prospect? Somebody who’s probably been on Sports Center? I’m saying they would’ve been found out right quick.

Now, I can hear you typing. That’s part of the horror, they would’ve kept getting away with it because they’re Black people, who the law is classically not about helping. To which I respond, yes, obviously.

But the internet clearly exists.

As more people within a given area started disappearing, with more frequency-the rapidly-aging Armitages are clearly not pacing themselves, because they only swiped Andre a few months before they tried to get Chris-people were inevitably going to tweet, organize, and investigate this shit themselves.

Remember how 4chan sniffed out the Boston bombers faster than the god-damn CIA? Think that, with BLM muscle behind it. Inevitably, the story would circulate in some fashion, until either the law was pressured into pursuing the matter, or civilians with body cams and live feeds were trawling the area themselves.

After awhile, somebody would have AT LEAST pegged Rose as involved, because her victims were probably posting their selfies with her on social media, and before too awful long she’d be rendered a pariah, and that cuts off one line of supply. Every black person in the country knows to run screaming from That White Bitch.

But, even leaving aside their complete lack of forethought in their idiotic operation, they very likely can’t perform this operation more than once. It’s already kind of a stretch to believe that ANY neurosurgeon can somehow slice a brain in half and keep it functional (brains are delicate as shit, there’s a reason they’re the off-switch for zombies), I don’t think anybody’s disbelief can be suspended far enough to think that this is a repeatable process. The scar tissue alone is going to lead to more trouble than it’s worth by body number three, never mind a fourth or fifth.

So, absolute worst case scenario, all these evil white motherfuckers (and the Model Minority Japanese man, did the bus just roll over something?) get themselves new Black bodies, and, somehow, concoct some cockamamie story about inheriting the wealth of their past selves, and by some miracle draft the paperwork perfectly, so the feds aren’t suspicious.

Now they got these young, virile bodies, and and extra fifty or sixty years to sit around. They’re gonna start fuckin’. And they’re going to have a shitload of Black children. And, I don’t care how rich they are, how well-mannered and actually-White they are on the inside, the New Armitages and their new kids would run into the same racism before they knew about it, and, amongst other things, that’s gonna rile up their “passengers” more and more, and make it hard as hell to function, which is to say nothing of the fact that SOMEBODY in this second generation is going to find out the circumstances of how their family came to be (if they’re leaving literal boxes of evidence around). And they’d get mad. It would get UGLY, guys, gals, and non-binary pals.

TL;DR: Get Out is good as hell and scary as you please, but like any horror movie, the overlying plot creaks a bit if you think about it too hard.

[moyconsulting]

Roof Marketing 101: How to Attract Roofing Leads Consistently

Consistency, consistency consistency. Figuring out a way to get and produce roofing leads consistently, every single month is what we're gonna be discussing in this video. So if you are looking for a means to do that every single month, stay tuned till the very end. Let's do it.

[embed]https://youtu.be/NIWEbmXXstg[/embed]

What is up beautiful people, my name is Mats Moy from Moy Consulting and what we do here is help roofing companies out as far as producing leads online.

Now if this is your first time on this channel, I encourage you to subscribe to this platform and hit the notification bell so that you get notified each and every single time I release a new video just like this one each and every single Wednesday. I promise you will not regret it, as you will find a full library to get you started. As far as producing leads, probably stuff that you're not doing right now anyway, so it's a good reason to subscribe.

Wanted: Consistency

Now a big problem that I come across whenever I speak to roofing company owners is that there's a lack of consistency when it comes to making the phone ring.

Normally after a storm, you're super busy. But a lot of people just pray for those storms. You're just sleeping at night, just praying that a hailstorm is gonna come through and save your business. And that is where the business really drums up and you stay busy for months if not a couple of years.

But once that dries up, the leads are gone. And it is at that moment that a lot of you start to look for other ways of producing leads for your company.

Now, I encourage you to set yourself up ahead of time rather than waiting until those leads have disappeared. So by the end of this video, I'm gonna share with you a few strategies to help you start producing leads consistently, rather than this up and down wave that you might be experiencing.

So what do we need to do to get more leads consistently online? It's not rocket science folks, you just need to be more consistent online. It's as simple as that.

So I wanna break it down into four different platforms that I personally love to use for the roofing contractors that I work with, and how to stay consistent on those four platforms to make sure you are producing leads, again, keyword, consistently.

Google Ads

Now my very first platform and my platform of choice because this is where I've seen the best results come in is Google Ads.

Now, Google Ads I would like to think is kind of a big boy platform meaning if you wanted to really play on Google Ads you're gonna need to cough up quite a bit of cash, right? And making that cash really work for you is dependent on a few things that you're going to be doing consistently.

Big mistake that a lot of people make is just thinking to themselves, well, I'm just gonna go on Google Ads, I'm going to try it out, you know figure things out and see how it goes. Huge mistake. Don't even think about touching Google Ads unless you've had proper training on how to use the platform.

Otherwise, you can expect your money to just get siphoned by Google. And next thing, you know you're waking up wondering what happened.

So what should you be doing on Google Ads consistently?

Split test, split test, split test

One, you should have a basic, at least a basic training on how the platform works. Besides that, we need to be consistently split testing our ads on Google.

Now, what that means is there was this analogy that I used last week where I'm using X-men in a cage. We got Wolverine going head to head with any challenger that comes in, and he's our champion.

So what you wanna do with split testing is keep throwing more people into the ring with Wolverine, and hoping that one of them is going to beat him.

Now, the likelihood of that is very slim in the movies. But with split testing with Google Ads, that's exactly what is going to happen eventually, right? You're gonna keep throwing new challengers into the ad group and have these two ads go head to head. And you're split testing to a point where we're trying to figure out which one of these ads is going to win.

And this is a process that needs to be done consistently. Always, you never stop doing this. And that's how you start to yield better and better and better results.

Keep adding negative keywords

With the Google Ads platform, another thing that you need to do consistently is to keep adding negative keywords. These words that will eliminate your money going to the trash and just getting wasted.

Keep adding these words to eliminate people who are searching for specific things to not trigger your ads. You don't wanna show up for let's say, roof repairs. If you don't wanna do roof repairs, put repairs as a negative keyword.

You wanna keep adding those keywords over time cause new people will be searching for new things. And whether you wanna add those new searches to the group of keywords that you're targeting, versus eliminating some of those words.

That's how you save money over time and start to yield better results. And you do this consistently. So those are really the two main things that you should be doing consistently with Google Ads. There's not much more to it, right?

Obviously, there are settings that you can be setting up but all this stuff is set up at the very beginning. You're setting up a campaign but the consistent part, which is not rocket science is really just those two things, pay attention, and just consistently optimize over time.

Google My Business

Our next platform is Google My Business. Now, how do we consistently use Google My Business to produce more and more results over time?

Use the Posts feature

Well, one, the Posts feature. Have you ever heard of the Posts feature, cause not a lot of people use it.

It is a tool given to you, it's free. Please use it and if you don't know how to utilize it yet, check out this video, it'll show you exactly how to go about using that Posts feature each and every single day.

Once you get the hang of it, it takes you no more than three minutes a day to use this and start providing, start generating roofing leads for your company each and every single day.

Start getting more reviews

Our second step with Google My Business is quite simple too. And this is something that each and every single one of you guys that own a roofing company should be doing daily. Get more reviews. Stop sending them to your Facebook, to your Yelp, to your BBB. Send them to Google, plain and simple.

This is the place where the majority of your new leads, new customers are going to come from. If any online marketing platform at all, it will mainly come from your Google My Business. It is free and it just requires you to go the extra mile to make sure that you get that review.

I know companies that have been in business 30 plus years don't have a single Google My Business review. And they're fortunate enough that their name has been out there for so long that a lot of people know them, word of mouth.

But if you're looking to get new business for someone who doesn't have a roofer in mind, they're gonna generally go and find the company that has good reviews online. So get them.

Subscribe to my channel

A bonus step for you guys to consistently do each and every single week is to be sure to come back to this channel. To do so, subscribe and hit the notification bell so that you get notified again every Wednesday, because you'll get content just like this each and every single week.

Website

Our third platform is your website. Now on your website, it's not enough to just create a website. A lot of you guys think, oh, you know we're just gonna get a website and hopefully, things work out. No, no, no.

You need to create a website with the purpose of nurturing it over time. It's so that it can grow and ultimately provide you with leads.

Write blog posts consistently

So the one thing that you need to be doing on your website once it's set up is to blog. Blog, blog, blog. Write content on a consistent basis, whether it be once a week, you know once bi-weekly or once a month. Whatever it is, pick a frequency and stick with it. That is going to help you generate more traffic to your website and look good in the eyes of Google.

Google Local Services Ads

The fourth platform that we're looking to set up here is Google Local Service Ads. Now, for those of you guys who are not familiar with the platform. If you do wanna get on it, I have a guide to show you how to set it up and help you produce leads from it.

Comment GLSA, Google Local Service Ads down below. I'll go ahead and send you that guide so you can set it up for yourself.

I recommend this platform because you will get cheap leads from it that are of high quality. $40 is what Google is probably gonna ask you for, give or take. That will get you somebody who's looking for a roofing service to pick up the phone and call your company directly. No middleman involved.

Get set up on that platform. Now what you need to do consistently on this platform is quite simple. Just monitor it, right? It runs itself.

Everything that I've mentioned in this here video, they're all machines, they're all assets. They're systems, they run themselves, they just need a little bit of maintenance every now and then.

And so make sure that you are paying attention to the Google Local Service Ads. Whenever you do get a bogus lead that comes in, just message Google and say, "Hey, this wasn't a valid lead. Can you credit me back for that?" And Google does a really good job of doing this unlike other companies *cough* HomeAdvisor *cough*. And so, you need to pay attention to it. It's so that you're able to see for yourself that, hey, these are actual leads coming in.

The targeting is right, it's the right kind of lead that I'm looking for. And that way you can go ahead and capitalize from it.

Book a call with me

So there you have it. Those are four things that you can do to consistently produce roofing leads for your business. And if you're interested in having someone help you set all of these platforms up, that's precisely what we do here at Moy Consulting.

I have a free webinar down below. That will show you and explain to you how to go about working with us. And setting up all of these platforms to produce leads for your business consistently.

Again, you might think to yourself, you're not tech-savvy. To give you some insight here, the oldest gentleman that we've helped set up a system like this to produce leads consistently is 63 years old. He could barely turn on his computer at all, and is now producing leads online. If he can do it, I guarantee you with our help, you can do it as well.

If you are interested in getting set up online and finally producing roofing leads consistently for your business, check out that webinar in the description down below.

Also, if you wanna join a community of roofers who are learning about this forever-changing space and seeing some exclusive content, I have a free online Mastermind group on Facebook. Be sure to join that, it's in the description down below. Just click the link, join the group, request access and I'll go ahead and approve that for you.

Lastly, if you enjoyed this entire video, be sure to hit the like button, subscribe to the channel, and make sure you hit the notification bell. It's so that you get notified whenever we release a new video just like this one each and every single Wednesday. So until next week, stay blessed, peace.

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Online Roof Marketing Strategies for Beginners That Work (Reach More Customers!): https://youtu.be/FPzYnQ6VHbY

The Ultimate Exclusive Roofing Leads Webinar: http://go.matsmoy.com/registration/

Be sure to join the secret Online Roofing Leads Mastermind Group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/onlineroofingleads/

TWEET THIS VIDEO: https://ctt.ac/eHUd6

Let’s connect on social media! Twitter: https://twitter.com/MatsMoy Instagram: https://instagram.com/matsmoy/ Facebook: https://facebook.com/matsmoy/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/matsmoy/

Learn More Here: Roof Marketing 101: How to Attract Roofing Leads Consistently

Moy Consulting 60 Queen St E #103, Brampton, ON L6V 1A9, Canada https://goo.gl/maps/hodRjHCYkvtjSwFW8

[wendyimmiller]

The SEO Garden: A Letter to the Midwest

June 26, 2020

Lovettsville, VA

Dear Scott,

Well, as your letter writing skills are obviously taking second place to your Facebook overshares, I thought I would pick up the baton (as most women must do in this life), and nudge you with its slightly nubby end.

The bananas are beginning to cook.

I enjoyed your latest Rant about things in the gardening world that you love and loathe, but erased my pithy comment about 600 characters in, feeling it was better to start a new, more focused, discussion on the things that also make me crazy as a gardener and garden writer in a new(ish) digital age.

As almost all of them involve a laptop which is not particularly photogenic, I’ll entertain you with pictures of the garden right now instead.

Bird-sown Petasites hybridus (with violet leaf for scale).

There are many things to love about the digital age of course – my word processor for one, my digital SLR for another.  Hell, my iPhone camera at this point. But I know, in a little tiny corner of my mind which I often close for comment, that each is working with the passage of time to make me lazier and less clever.  Depth of field nuance? Grammatical flourish? Tricky spellings which tax the brain? All casualties to algorithms and sweet sweet convenience if I allow it.  And I so often do.

And these are skills we should be loathe to lose. A writer friend wrote the following on syntax, which I have pinned up in my office on a 3×5 card to remind me of the fun of it all – the reason if you will to turn off Microsoft Editor, and Yoast, and the specter of your fourth grade teacher insisting that you will be pitched into the fires of hell if you start a sentence with a conjunction:

It’s no sin to tax the grammar. If you’ve the skill, then you canna.

The Scots would point out, quite rightfully, that the last word negates the gist of the thing, but I like to feel it is penned in the style of Ogden Nash.  Perhaps you might prefer CAKE’s more modern approach with the lyrics of John McCrea in Stabbing Shadows:

Adjectives on a typewriter, he moves his words like a prizefighter. The frenzied pace of the mind inside the cell.

That last line’s gotta resonate with the man who just penned 722 words (I counted) on high octane gasoline.

So if we allow these things to ‘help us,’ will they eventually hurt us instead? Which brings me to the issue of the modern ropes, however silken, that tie us in knots and limit the creative [horticultural] mind. I wonder if you’ll agree.

Echinacea ‘Tres Amigos’ with belamcanda fans – now Iris domestica.

Autocorrect

Do you know how long it takes to thumb-type Aechmea fasciata into a phone with muddy hands? Do you know how much I’m forced to drink when I then read ‘Arch fascists’ on a text I’ve just sent to a botanist friend who is probably wondering how much news I’ve been taking in lately – and from which websites?

Wait a minute, of course you do, you’ve got at least a decade on me. At least I can see my screen at this point.

All said, it does tend to limit the amount of times one wants to thumb-type Achmea fasciata into a phone with muddy hands. Easier to type ‘urn plant’ and pray there’s only one.

Well, not an achmea, but an ananas. Pineapples in Virginia. So. Much. Fun.

Google dictation

Which, like its evil brother, Autocorrect, does not understand botanical nomenclature and turns a simple task into ten wasted minutes of your life you will never get back. Here’s a great example from today: Tripsicum dactyloides to the folks at Apple is “trips to come back to the ladies.”

And, if I type it in, and forget to hit that top left “Yes, that’s damn well what I typed” word suggestion, I get something equally incomprehensible courtesy of Autocorrect. Unless of course, I’ve typed it before. Or not. Depends. Meanwhile, the tripsicum has spread four inches.

I imagine Dr. Fauci and his lot are struggling with the same issues: “No! I said remdesivir – the polymerase inhibitor, you idiot machine, not ‘REM death severe.’  Holy hell – like the President needs to think sleep will kill people at this point.  Somebody get me a new phone.”

Writing for SEO

I do believe I dislike this most of all. Not simply because of the articles that have been butchered by editors with their hungry marketing eyes fixated (quite understandably) on key words and their synonyms awkwardly repeated 16 times in 900 words. Nor because of one-sentence paragraphs that can no longer hold their heads up proudly and call themselves paragraphs. But because of the nuance that is lost when all this happens – particularly when it comes to clever, teasing titles.

Would you rather read “The Necessity of Underwear” to gently introduce you to the painful subject of staking, or scroll through yet another “The One Crazy Trick Great Gardens Have in Common – Sure to Shock You!”

Mixed shrubs made ever so much better by a touch of Cosmopolitan. (Miscanthus sinensis)

Had this SEO nonsense been the norm eighty years ago, it would have completely obliterated most great garden literature, including the scratchings of His Royal Highness, Monty Don. Loathe as I am to mention great British garden writers in light of your sensitivity on the subject, I feel an example is necessary.

One of Christopher Lloyd’s Country Life articles “Shun the Invisible Worm” (found in In My Garden) is a piece about succession bloom in late summer borders; and somewhere, deep in the meat of it, he comes to the threat of introducing the phlox eelworm into one’s garden.  Then, just as quickly, back to love of plants, and of hybrid rhododendrons. The worm was just a blip; but in finding it and moving through the article, the reader-gardener is transported deep within Lloyd’s kingdom.

I simply wouldn’t have fallen in love with that garden (or that wit) without that journey.  One feels the garden. One begins to know the garden.  His articles are a mix of straight-to-point and linger-a-little.  Both are necessary.

The great American garden writer Henry Mitchell wrote similarly, as did many others in the days before newspapers threw out their garden columnists onto hard pavement — forcing them to sell their souls in a world run by Yoast and its little red frowny faces.

New 2020 title for Lloyd’s piece: The Terrifying Pest That Will Destroy Your Garden!

Notes from 2020 editor: Remove rhodos and summer border options.  Not relevant. Need some keyphrase headers.  Can you make the worm more terrifying?

Notes from Lloyd: [annoyed muttering]

Primo Black Pearl heuchera (a long-lived stunner!) with Sun Power hosta.

Those frowny faces say impertinent things like “Keyphrase has been found less than four times.”  “42% of your sentences contain more than 20 words.” “82% of your readers have started scanning their Instagram feed.”

I wonder if those who don’t blog or write content for websites (all fifteen of them) understand how much has been lost in a one-inch-deep marketplace.  20 words folks.  That’s what Yoast and Google think of our ability to read at this point.

For the benefit of future employers/editors reading this letter, I feel compelled to add that I am fully versed in SEO and will absolutely sell my soul in a world run by Yoast and its little red frowny faces. The pavement is so very hard. Scott, I’m sure you’ll join me in my abject groveling.

Writers gotta hustle in a COVID world.

Exclamation points

Or rather, the new need for us to use exclamation points in texts, emails, or prose — or risk pissing someone off with our disembodied, obviously snotty, tone!

You probably wouldn’t understand because you’re so “good-natured” and “sometimes humorous,” but some of us don’t have to work that hard to make others believe we’re using a snotty tone, so we’re forced to use more exclamation points!

To friends! To colleagues! To people we’ve never met before! I die a little bit each time I do it! To those who flatly refuse – I deeply respect your stance! But maybe you’re grumpy!  I can’t tell! And see paragraph above!

I always think I love the red ones the best, then I see the pure lavender ones.

Can we all just agree to stop using them?!? Can we all just agree that an slightly uplifted tone is implied in all correspondence, no matter how short?!? Please!

Insane misinformation, perfectly SEO’d

Insane. And because I have no idea if it is libelous to quote these people, I won’t.   Instead I’ll make up something that I may, or may not have recently read, by someone who may, or may not have 45 thousand followers, of whom 44 thousand may, or may not, be Russian bots.

“Plant green healthy taro! The healthy leaves are awesome in the garden!  And good for you!  You can eat the green healthy leaves in tons of ways!  People say the leaves are medicinal – I’m sure they totally are! They just LOOK healthy! And green! Why not try it? Plant medicine is good medicine right? Right!”

Not for salad fixins’

There’s those exclamation points again.

Yeah buddy. You’re right.  Taro leaves do happen to be edible.  Boiled. Boiled hard. Just don’t make one of those “tons of ways” chomping on the raw leaves with a steaming cup of ashwagandha before you start your sun salutations, or your throat will swell shut.  And then you’ll need something other than plant medicine to realign your chakras.

While I give everyone and anyone a free pass to make mistakes in life and in print as we all do, I cannot get over some of the utter horseshit I see out there.  I suppose I should be thankful that it’s mostly Russian bots scanning it.

What was my SEO header keyphrase again?

Speaking of plant medicine, it appears to be time to close up this fabulously clever word processor with all of its little demons and frowny faces, and mix myself a G&T – though I know we disagree on the sticky issue of what to pair with one’s tonic. Your penchant for Vodka is unsettling, but I will assume a Vodka tonic pairs well with a Vodka jello square after a long day keeping the elephants off the phlox. Personally I don’t see why you don’t use Everclear and save a bit of cash.

Can we at least agree on Pimms? Don’t tell me your mixer is soda water.

Yours in the sublime brilliance of tonic at least,

Marianne

P.S. Just rebuilt the carburetor on my edger with the help of a friend. I too loathe this gasoline dance we do, but at Stihl’s exorbitant European-esque fuel prices, I’ll continue to use my additives.

P.P.S. The irony of having to mess with the SEO of this letter to achieve Green-Face Nirvana has sent me to my second G&T.

  The SEO Garden: A Letter to the Midwest originally appeared on GardenRant on June 27, 2020.

The post The SEO Garden: A Letter to the Midwest appeared first on GardenRant.

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