#somebody played despacito here

[teethkid67]

when i was growing up there was a trailer a few doors down and the owners always left the door unlocked and open. the neighboorhood kids were always allowed inside and they had really good snacks. the weird thing was that they didnt have kids. it was just some random couple that had an endless supply of fudgcicles. they had an xbox we would play on and an alexa that was always playing despacito. always. 100% of the time without a doubt. despacito.

-🇺🇸🦅

okay im kind of obsessed w them . fudgecicles i literally havent thought about fudgecicles in AGES

heres baby bptommy eating a fudgecicle on somebodys front porch

[llivoce]

I just heard someone pronounce KLM as ‘khelem’ and I don’t know what to think

[catharsis-in-a-bottle]

thoughts on On A Sunbeam by Tillie Walden

Where do I even start?

I'm going to make a list, in no particular order, because there is no other possible way for me to even organize my thoughts on this book. (Spoiler alert if you'd like to read it in the future)

First thing's first... my friend lent me this book and expected me to live?? They expected it to not put a spear straight through my heart??

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

Okay okay here's an actual bullet point: Let's start with the worldbuilding. I feel like that can be a more difficult thing to do in a graphic novel, as you can't go on rambling sentences about world backstory - but Tillie Walden fucking nailed it. She made it feel realistic; she wrote real high-school characters and made a boarding school in space feel like an Earth school. She made it feel outlandish; she dove us into a world of koi-like spaceships, floating building complexes, the far reaches of the galaxy, a world full of life and death where no one leaves and no one enters. It's so very unique and I truly think it's genius, and it still feels so human even though it's very futuristic

The way she writes queer people... there are no men in the book as far as I know, first of all, which leaves room for So Many Lesbians and such varied gender presentations among them... I am absolutely In Love. And the way she wrote Elliot, and their friends defending their identity and pronouns to Jo, and otherwise having a nonbinary character be such a casual aspect of the story - a nonbinary character with depth, mind you - means so much to me. (The way queerness is integrated into this book feels a lot like Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir but I'll talk about that another time perhaps)

More on Elliot. Having a nonverbal character made my heart feel so goddamn good, and again the fact that their friends adamantly defended them - I LOVE IT I FUCKING LOVE IT. Ell has my whole heart. They're a tech wizard, a badass fighter, and a loving friend, and again I finally have a nonbinary character with deep meaning to the story, which is incredibly rare (cough cough, I can't even think of a single other instance of that, actually).

Mia and Grace. Oh my god. This book made me cry. This book made me HOLD IN MY TEARS WHILE I SAT IN SOMEBODY ELSE'S LIVING ROOM. It had a romance that I could finally find meaning in from the perspective of someone with a difficult relationship with romance - Mia and Grace, and Alma and Char. In relation to Mia and Grace - their relationship made sense, and it was so WARM I cried and then they held on to each other in the school anti-gravity chamber or whatever that was and... AHHHHHHWHSEIWUWHSBNAQJQKQK

Grace leaving and Mia not getting to say goodbye holy SHIT there's the SPEAR there goes the spear through my heart

Alma and Char also felt like such a good portrayal of an adult relationship and I cannot explain why they made me feel so good but they did

Char is amazingly smart and cool-headed, and exactly the type of character I get emotionally attached to. (Which is also why I got attached to Grace.) When Char got suspended and had to leave the ship I was so sad Alexa play Despacito

All the characters on the Aktis had their strengths. Alma: natural leader, assertive, organized. Char: cool-headed under pressure, smart, compassionate. Jules: funny, light-hearted, cheerful, ability to connect with ancient Eldritch fox beings (lol). Ell: calm, intelligent, strategic, kind. Mia: quick learner, friendly, also compassionate, willing to help. This is the best found family I've ever fucking read, period. Especially once Grace got added to the bunch. They were all so different, and in depth, and their backstories connected and made sense and they all just clicked. I would die for them.

Can I talk about the worldbuilding again just for a moment? How empty (complimentary) it made me feel? How lost in space it left me? The majority of the graphic panels had black as the most space-filling color. I don't know how to describe this, but it gave the story itself almost a black background, and it added to the effect of... something that was nearly horror, or at least abject loneliness. Everything in the novel felt spacially far apart because everything was so far apart. It took months to travel from place to place. And the places themselves were mostly desolate - the old religious building in the beginning, and then The Staircase. It's my favorite type of worldbuilding: it hollows you out and leaves you yearning to see every corner of the world the author has created, knowing that if you were in the book itself, you could never even come close to seeing or understanding everything. It's my favorite type of scariness and it's exactly why I love Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth, and therefore this book as well.

And can I talk about the color scheme thing? How everything that was happening in the "present", with Alma and everyone on the ship, was colored mainly in purple / warm colors, and then all the boarding school flashback scenes were mainly blue / cool colors? And how they MIXED AT THE END WHEN THEY WENT TO FIND GRACE AND THEREFORE UNITED THE TWO TIMELINES???? THATS FUCKING GENIUS. there i talked about the color scheme thing

The Staircase... god that was so cool. Shit. It had a cowboy feel and yet there also an ANCIENT FOX within it (which also terrified me) and I just - yeah I will not shut the fuck up about the worldbuilding it is SO DAMN COOL

I'm tired and I think I could say more but I want to fall asleep now. One last thing: no i do not feel much romantic attraction yes this book makes me want a girlfriend

Okay that's all, I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who may happen to see this post, I swear it just changed my worldview a tiny bit in the span of 2 hours

Oh and here's a sample frame of art from it:

Yeah. Okay. Bye.

[rpmemestorehouse]

2010′s Internet Memes Starters

Change wording as needed

“Are you frustrated?”

“What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I-”

“Let me tell you why that’s bullshit.”

“Oh stop it, you.”

“Aww yiss.”

“France is bacon.”

“That’s cute.”

“Lie down. Try not to cry. Cry a lot.”

“Has science gone too far?”

“...said no-one ever.”

“We need to go deeper.”

“Do you think this is a motherfucking game?”

“NOPE.”

“Oh baby, a triple!”

“Brushie brushie brushie~”

“Spooky scary skeletons!”

“FUCK YEA.”

“You could stop at five or six stores, or, just ONE.”

“You hear about video games?”

“Release the kraken!”

“Will you fight? Or will you perish like a dog?”

“ ‘It will be FUN’, they said!”

“You’ve been GNOMED!”

“Deal with it.”

“And not a single fuck was given that day.”

“It’s a double rainbow!”

“The rent is too damn high!”

“You jelly?”

“Challenge accepted.”

“Come at me bro!”

“Pootis!”

“Whatcha thinkin’ ‘bout?”

“Are you a wizard?”

“Bitch please!”

“I know that feel bro.”

“Shut up and take my money!”

“I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.”

“NO.”

“I hope you step on a LEGO.”

“That really rustled my jimmies.”

“And then a skeleton popped out!”

“I’ve seen some shit.”

“gEnIuS!”

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”

“This isn’t even my final form!”

“You had one job.”

“Kill me.”

“Majestic as FUCK.”

“Excuse me sir, do you have a moment to talk about [insert]?”

“I swear on me mum...”

“You have no power here!”

“REKT!”

“What a time to be alive.”

“If I pull that off, will you die?”

“It will be extremely painful...for you.”

“FUCK THIS GAY EARTH!”

“Hide the pain Harold.”

“Local man ruins everything.”

“Mom, get the camera!”

“I cri evrytiem.”

“The struggle is real.”

“I am the one who knocks!”

“Perfection.”

“This is the darkest timeline.”

“I’m about to end this man’s whole career.”

“I regret nothing!!!”

“I lied.”

“I’ve seen enough [insert] to know where THIS is going.”

“Oh god why-”

“Everyday I’m shufflin’-”

“You wot mate?”

“Everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked...”

“Man door hand hook car door-”

“Palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, vomit on my sweater already, Mom's spaghetti-”

“Oppa Gangnam style!”

“When [place] is ashes, you have my permission to die.”

“I only cried for 20 minutes.”

“Pepperidge Farm remembers.”

“Go home, [Name], you’re drunk.”

“Fuck me, right?”

“I should buy a boat.”

“2deep4you”

“Apply cold water to that burn.”

“420 blaze it!”

“That’s a nice new [insert]. It would be a shame if something happened to it...”

“I too, like to live dangerously.”

“You know nothing, [Name].”

“I’m getting too old for this shit.”

“Does this look like the face of mercy?”

“It was me, [OWN NAME]!”

“Stop trying to make [insert] happen! It’s not going to happen!”

“You merely adopted the darkness.”

“See? Nobody cares.”

“I will find you, and I will kill you.”

“I understood that reference!”

“Listen here, you little shit-”

“It’s an older meme, sir, but it checks out.”

“Ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuoli.”

“How do you do, fellow kids?”

“Ow, the edge!”

“*teleports behind you* Nothing personal, kid.”

“Pee is stored in the balls.”

“We have food at home.”

“You must be new here.”

“Goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters.”

“ERMAHGERD BERKS-”

“That’s the evilest thing I can imagine!”

“Dammit Moon Moon!”

“When u mom com home and make hte spagheti-“

“When will you learn? When will you learn?! THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?!”

“helo would u like some of this hot choclety milk?”

“Be strong, [Name]. Be strong for Mother.”

“Ayy LMAO.”

“Surprise, bitch. I bet you thought you’d seen the last of me.”

“Shrek is love, Shrek is life.”

“Heard you were talking shit!”

“The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.”

“Look at me. I’m the captain now.”

“This could be us, but you playing.”

“They played us like a damn fiddle!”

“I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now.”

“I’m in me mum’s car, broom broom!”

“Hand me the aux cord.”

“Press F to pay respects.”

“Trust nobody, not even yourself.”

“Anime was a mistake.”

“It’s just a prank, bro!”

“Don’t talk to me or my son ever again.”

“Are ya winning, son?”

“Had it not been for the laws of this land, I would have slaughtered you.”

“I lived bitch!”

“You just have to say that you're fine, when you're not really fine, but you just can't get into it because they would never understand.”

“*chuckles* I’m in danger.”

“That wasn’t very cash money of you.”

“They had us in the first half, not gonna lie.”

“DEEZ NUTS-”

“Alone on a Friday night? God, you’re pathetic.”

“Why the fuck you lyin’? Why you always lyin’? Mmmm oh my GOD, stop fuckin’ lyin’~”

“You’re gonna have a bad time.”

“I’m at soup!”

“IT’S TIME TO STOP!”

“Congratulations, you played yourself.”

“I’m you, but stronger.”

“This is fine.”

“Hello darkness my old friend~”

“Sosig.”

“Jesus Christ, it’s Jason Bourne!”

“I have crippling depression!”

“WE ARE NUMBER ONE!”

“That’s where you’re wrong, kiddo.”

“Take a fucking sip, babes.”

“Brother, may I have some oats?”

“God I wish that were me.”

“Ah, I see you’re a man of culture as well.”

“Oh, worm?”

“Hewwo!”

“Why would you say something so controversial yet so brave?”

“Am I a joke to you?”

“Let me in. LET ME IIIIIINNNNN!!!!!”

“You know I had to do it to ‘em.”

“Why is the FBI here?”

“Oh no baby what is you doin’???”

“Hey man, you see that guy over there?”

“Buenos días, [Name]!”

“Hey there demons, it’s me, ya boy.”

“Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.”

“Then perish.”

“Somebody toucha my spaghet!”

“My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined.”

“Weird flex, but okay.”

“I’m baby.”

“STONKS!”

“OK, boomer.”

“Yep, this one’s going in my cringe compilation.”

“This is so sad. Alexa, play Despacito.”

“Perfectly balanced, as all things should be.”

“All right then, keep your secrets.”

“They did surgery on a grape.”

“It ain’t much, but it’s honest work.”

“Look how they massacred my boy!”

“Bro! You just posted cringe! You are going to lose subscriber.”

“Wait, that’s illegal.”

“Bro, I’m straight-up not having a good time.”

“Gonna cry? Gonna piss your pants maybe?”

“I’m gonna do what’s called a pro gamer move.”

“Say sike right now.”

[johannesviii]

Top 10 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2009

20 to 21 years old. And so the 2000s end, not with a whimper, but with an explosion of upbeat, great pop songs.

Only one third of these lists left to make!

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

First to second and final year of my Master degree in Contemporary History. Also got two summer jobs that year. I was basically only researching and writing my master thesis at this point and trying to survive on a 50€ per month budget to pay for transport, clothes, driving lessons, and food apart from one meal a day. Needless to say, some corners had to be cut and my health wasn’t the best. I was also trying to register to pass some concours d’Etat to be a government worker considering there was 0% chance I’d be able to find a job otherwise with my qualifications and my mother had been trying to find an excuse to throw me out for more than four years at this point. Basically I was broke, stressed out and in panic mode.

Thank god, the music was mostly energetic and upbeat on the radio. I can’t imagine what my mood would have been like if the charts had been as horribly depressed as in 2018 or 2019.

This was also the year when my favorite music reviewer ever, Todd In The Shadows, started to make his first videos, so you might think his lists are going to influence mine, but as it turns out we have very, very different tastes for the most part (I mean come on, the guy hates Depeche Mode), so... not so much. But he helped me discover a lot of songs I would have ignored otherwise, so yeah, godspeed, Todd.

It should be mentioned that the two songs that I wanted to put at the top of this list before looking at the actual year-end lists turned out to be non-elligible and that is extremely frustrating. Obviously, as I mentioned in the previous post, there’s Life In Technicolor II by Coldplay, which has an incredibly fitting name since it’s one of their most colorful songs ever. But I’m not even sure I would have put it at #1 since this was the year of Mika’s second album, and oh my god, We Are Golden was FANTASTIC. It’s my absolute favorite song from the guy, the music video is incredibly fun, and I listened to that shit on a loop as soon as it dropped.

I usually don’t put such large links for non-elligible songs but the fact this isn’t elligible is nothing short of criminal. Check it out if you’ve never heard it.

As for albums from bands I liked... eh. Lacuna Coil dropped Shallow Life, which was not as good as KarmaCode, Pet Shop Boys dropped Yes which wasn’t nearly as good as Fundamental, Depeche Mode dropped Sounds of the Universe which was DEFINITELY not as good as Playing the Angel (I liked Wrong, though. But it’s not elligible), Eminem released Relapse which was joyless and pretty bad and he was kinda dead to me at that point (even if it wasn’t as terrible as Encore AND he had that song with Drake that was very good), Placebo released Battle for the Sun which was pretty great but still not as good as their previous two albums, Paradise Lost had Faith Divides Us Faith Unites Us and basically same thing there, and Indochine had La République des Météors which is imho their worst record in the past twenty years, by far.

Long story short, every single one of the bands and artists I loved who released an album that year let me down (except Placebo, maybe).

And then VNV Nation released Of Faith, Power And Glory, I listened to it, and suddenly I had a new favorite band, and everything was good and beautiful in the world again. Album of the year for me, hands down.

With that out of the way, a few honorable mentio-HOLY SHIT HOW MANY OF THESE ARE THERE, WTF

Replay (Iyaz) - A perfectly good and innocent little earworm.

Run This Town (Rihanna) - I don’t like the original very much (Kanye’s verse is atrocious) but I've had a mashup of it with Bach’s Tocatta & Fugue in D minor (yes you read that right) on my mp3 player for years now, so this has to count. The mashup is called Run This Town In D Minor. It’s one of my favorite mashups ever. I even made fanart of it once! Look it up if you can, the original video has apparently disappeared.

Circus (Britney Spears) - You know it’s a good year for pop when even Britney Spears makes music I like.

Magnificent (U2) - Wait, even U2 was making decent music? I had zero use for them since at that point Linkin Park had more or less taken over their ecological-musical niche of “mainstream epic-sounding pop-rock music with tortured vocals and Emotions(tm)” but that one was still kinda nice.

Même Pas Fatigué (Magic System & Khaled) - I’ve said that before and I’ll say it again but they always bring a smile to my face and I don’t get why it’s ‘cool’ to hate their songs in my country. Yeah, they often sound the same, but I’d listen to ten similar-sounding Magic System songs in a heartbeat whereas you’d have to pay me to listen to ten similar-sounding Nickelback songs.

Day n Nite (Kid Cudi) - This had a tendency to get stuck in my head, but not at all in an unpleasant way.

21 Guns (Green Day) - Much better than I remembered.

When Love Takes Over (David Guetta), Stereo Love (Edward Maya ft Vika Jigulina), Evacuate the Dancefloor (Cascada) - That year was full of catchy, stupid, energetic songs, wasn’t it?

Greenlight (John Legend) - If I had better taste, this would be on the list. Alas, you’re reading the top 10s of someone who once put Blue (Eiffel 65) in a #1 spot, so yeah.

In Your Hands (Charlie Winston) - Same thing, basically.

Like a Hobo (Charlie Winston) - “Like a hobo from a broken home, nothing’s gonna stop me”, said this very useful song. Now is a good time to remind you that my nickname at the public university was The Hobo. So yeah. I liked this song a lot and I still do.

Forever (Drake) - Drake and Eminem are both amazing on this track. Unfortunately there’s also Kanye West and Lil Wayne on it. But. Like. “I'm Hannibal Lecter so just in case you're thinking of saving face / You ain't gonna have no face to save”. Dude. Duuuuuude.

You Found Me & Never Say Never (The Fray) - Did I mention I really, really liked this band. I think I did. Several times.

Paparazzi & Love Game (Lady Gaga) - Would both have had a chance to land on the list without the incredible amount of great, catchy tunes that year had to offer.

C’est Dans l’Air (Mylène Farmer) - Mylène Farmer had THREE singles on the French year-end list and this is the ONLY one I like. Good electro, mediocre verses but a great chorus (and a weird and kind of hilarious music video). Basically a song saying we’re all going to die and she can only sing about it. It’s strange, it’s a bit dark in a fun way, but it’s sadly not enough to land on the list, and it was the last cut from it.

Phew. Making this list was like a Hunger Games of catchy, upbeat, stupid songs to find which one was the best. It’s not #1 but I’m still shocked I had to put it so high.

But first, the runner ups.

10 - Fire Burning (Sean Kingston)

US: #33 / FR: Not on the list

Yes, ALL these honorable mentions were kicked out to give the last spot on the list to this guy and a chorus that goes “somebody call 911, shawty fire burning on the dance floor, WOAH!”.

The fact that I don’t feel bad about it means this was the right pick for that spot.

9 - Rain (Mika)

US: Not on the list / FR: #22

Anybody else thinks Mika looks like the Fourth Doctor on this screenshot from the music video or is it just me?

Anyway. So yeah, as I said, We Are Golden would have topped this list if it had been elligible. Sadly, it isn’t, but Rain is. I don’t like it nearly as much as We Are Golden, but what can I say. It’s still Mika. I’ll take whatever I can.

8 - I Gotta Feeling (Black Eyed Peas)

US: #4 / FR: #17

I lost about 80% of the respect I had for this song the day I realised its untouchable, marvellous beat was very probably stolen from Take a Dive. I still love it though. Had a few actual parties in 2010 and early 2011 and this was garanteed to make everyone dance, even people like me who don’t know how to dance.

And then the dancefloor died instantly anytime anyone tried to put Boom Boom Pow on because it’s impossible to dance on that one. But that’s another story.

7 - Poker Face (Lady Gaga)

US: #2 / FR: #5

Needless to say this was absolutely everywhere and overplayed to death and beyond, and the fact I still wanted to listen to it and put it on my playlists really tells you how good I thought it was (and still is).

6 - Ça m’énerve (Helmut Fritz)

US: Not on the list / FR: #1 (...yes.)

This is a novelty song with a singer pretending to have a thick German accent, complaining about various things in France, like the fact he doesn’t fit the dress code for a club, that he wanted to buy a sweater with “Rock” written on it but it’s out of stock, that some girls can fit in a size 34 blue jean and not him, that there’s a queue of people trying to buy macarons at the Ladurée shop, and so on. And every time he concludes “that gets on my nerves”, said in a very flat tone. Here’s a translation.

It was overplayed as f█ck here. Think Despacito levels of overplay. But the beat is great and it’s still hysterical after having heard it about a hundred times that year.

Fun fact, while I was making this list and relistening to this song, my s.o said “haha that sounds great! What is it?” and I stared at him in disbelief. Somehow, he was completely serious. That’s like someone escaping the Great Macarena Onslaught Of 1996. What happened. How.

5 - Waking Up In Vegas (Katy Perry)

US: #36 / FR: Not on the list

Again, I must remind you that my s.o is a Katy Perry fan and that I’ve heard this song even more than the average radio listener did at the time, and it’s STILL #5 on this list. What can I say. It’s a ton of fun and one of my favorite songs from her.

4 - New Divide (Linkin Park)

US: #61 / FR: Not on the list

Is this their best song? Not by a f█cking mile. I thought it would be much lower when I started to make this specific list, but what can I say. Linkin Park is like that one old friend that you kept no contact with for years, and once you meet them again, it’s like they never left. Who cares if that wasn’t nearly as good as Numb or In the End? Not me, that’s for sure.

Also, “In every loss in every lie / In every truth that you deny / And each regret and each goodbye / Was a mistake too great to hide / And your voice was all I heard / That I get what I deserve”. Holy shit, dude.

3 - Good Girls Go Bad (Cobra Starship)

US: #43 / FR: Not on the list

BEHOLD. THE ONLY SURVIVOR OF THE 2009 ‘CATCHY UPBEAT STUPID SONGS’ HUNGER GAMES. THE CATCHIEST, UPBEAT-IEST, STUPIDEST OF THEM ALL. HERE IT IS AT LAST.

The thing I love about this is that it’s a song made by nerds for nerds and that the singer looks and sounds completely non-threatening. As Todd said in his own list back in the day, “that guy couldn’t make good MILK go bad” and that’s what’s so endearing about the song, I think.

Also yes, this is, in fact, placed above Linkin Park.

2 - Use Somebody (Kings of Leon)

US: #14 / FR: Not on the list

This was my #1 at first. I LOVED it. I even bought the album, even though, as you know, my funds were very low that year. That music is soaring. It’s majestic. Well, the lyrics aren’t that majestic and soaring, it’s about loving someone and trying to catch their attention, but the rest? Damn this is intense. It was also elligible for the 2010 list, by the way, where I ALSO wondered if it should be #1, but in both cases, it wasn’t meant to be.

And so this list of 2009 hit songs comes to a close.

It began with the forging of the Great 2009 Upbeat Songs. Three were given to the Punk Rock hits. Seven to the Dance Tracks. And nine, nine songs were gifted to the Radio Friendly Pop Songs, which above all else desired power.

But they were all deceived, for another song was made. Deep in the forgotten land of Synth Pop, in his Parents’ Basement, the Dark Lord Adam Young forged a master song, and into this song he poured his joy, his talent and his will to dominate all charts.

One song to rule them all.

1 - Fireflies (Owl City)

US: #60 / FR: Not on the list (76 the next year)

I know. It’s a meme nowadays. But still. Have you any idea how satisfying a song with an initial beat that looks like small pulsing yellow and blue lights in the dark ACTUALLY titled “Fireflies” is? How gentle it all sounds and looks, even when the music soars? The number of drawings and paintings I made just based on the colors of THAT song? It’s like a synth pop version of one of my favorite Mike Oldfield tunes ever, Weightless.

And then, on top of all the rest, how relatable was that guy’s body language and general attitude?? Before even knowing he was on the spectrum I was like “oh BIG mood.”

Also following his twitter was one of the best decisions I ever made.

So yeah. I would have loved to put Coldplay or Mika in that #1 spot, but I’m not too mad about it thanks to this wonderful little song and its author. Such a shame Deer in the Headlights and Alligator Sky aren’t elligible for the 2011 list.

Next up: Johannes finally moves out and finds a great job and starts living a little, plus here’s a #1 that will be difficult to justify

[renaer-is-allegedly-hot]

session 10 notes

oh wow yeah the layout of these will just forever be trash now bc it’s a lot of formatting work like a LOT sorry

• Presentation prep

○ Jacob is doing a tier list of every smash character in the world ever

• Apparently picchu was really busted

○ Idk who picchu is tho

○ Peechoo

○ I think it's picchu bc I think I've seen that before

• Are waterbenders ghostbusters

• R we starting

A few my little pony quizzes real quick

• When we last left off

• We were using medallions or whatever to search for stuff

• Broke into the city of the dead

• Were ambushed but interrogated one of them after killing the others

• Adam convinced that one that we chucked the stone

• We let him live but adam took his pants

• Not midnight but it's raining a lot

What are we doing

• As we leave the graveyard adam is getting chains out of george bush and putting it back on the gate

• Nvm we're just gonna follow naya

• Put chains back on 

• Squelching through mud

• Make way back w little trouble

○ We were able to set up the stuff?

○ Looks like some ppl r patrolling

○ Still hard to see bc rainy so we haven't been noticed

• Keep following naya

• Make way out safely

• Naya varies the pace every now and then

• Rain dies off later in the night

• Start approaching poorer area of the trade ward; fewer shops and businesses, more poorer housing

• Naya looks like she's leading us towards a windmill in the distance

• Just a towering windmill

• Not much wind so not spinning

• Cel makes perception check at disadvantage, can't see anything

• Naya runs up and stops in front of the windmill then vanishes

○ The second time we used naya's scry power? Maybe? Nvm?

• Does ur wifi ever poop itself

○ Nice

○ Ok I'll just keep sitting here ig

• Ok we're in a dark room and can't hear any sounds of a bloodbath

• There's a door

• Adam puts his ear to see if he can see anything, perception check

○ 8

• Door is solid wood

• Adam opens ground floor door

○ There r two doors

§ One on the side and one on the top

§ Ok we're in the windmill

• Cel pulls out lantern

• Adam opens door and sees a lot of people who look like they're sleeping on the floor

○ 5ish

○ Look like squatters

• Adam rolls 22 perception to see if he recognizes anyone, no one looks familiar

• Sneak by them ? Try to ?

• Adam can see another door that goes further in

• Adam snaps tiny flame on finger and rest of us follow the flame

• We walk over to next door

• Not locked

• Quietly go through

• Asyna is going to stay in the first room w ppl to watch them

○ In case they wake up / as guard

○ "hehe . Shillelagh"

○ "whack 'em with your 'forget-me' stick"

• Proposition for asyna to pretend she's sleeping

• Enter next room, just as dark as other

○ A few doors leading to left and right in front of us

○ In distance can see more people sleeping but only two

○ Looks empty

○ Lights lantern

• Adam pokes head through closest door

○ There's just more people

○ Strategy to burn entire building will not work

○ Cel can't tell if anyone looks like they're armed

• Do I want banana bread

• Going to peek into all the rooms

• Every room marked w2 has ppl sleeping

• What's happening in w3

• "so I look outside bc I heard somebody blasting despacito… there's a pickup truck towing a boat and there's a bunch of teenagers on it raving" - dom, 2020

• W3 is a wc a water closet as in a bathroom

• W4 is a closet w some cleaning stuff and grains

• Some ppl have woken up but they don't bother to like really watch us suspiciously

• Upstairs we go

• Three doors leading out of the room but also a large millstone in the center of the room

• Under debris, soaking wet from a hole in the ceiling

• Adam tries to move debris

• Cel rolls 15 perception, can't hear anything

○ Adam rolls nat1 and the stone resists adam's efforts

○ Technically a 0

• What's behind door w6

○ Caved in sections

○ Floor littered w bird droppings

○ Adam investigates "that's a 12 for eggs dominic"

○ There are eggs but they are fertilized eggs

○ Adam has to b careful

§ Gently picks up pigeon egg

§ "I have a plan if combat starts"

§ Adam is now carrying a pigeon egg

• What's in w8?

○ W7 first

○ W7 is locked

○ Adam tries the key; theo makes perception check first

§ Nat1 so can't hear anything

§ Adam tries the key

□ "I'm gonna stick that key into the lockhole"

□ It doesn't fit

§ 14, can't unlock

§ Aerana tries, 22

§ Lock clicks open

§ Cel peers inside

□ There's an open window, the room is cold

□ There's a door leading into a separate room

□ Armoire

□ Also two human males holding shovels

□ "congratulations - you're free" - adam

□ "what the hell r u on about"

□ "we unlocked your door that was previously locked presumably from the outside but now the door's open and you can walk through it"

□ "we locked it on purpose"

□ "none of ur business how we do ours what do you want"

□ "why did you lock yourself in here"

□ "bc this is our apartment"

□ Smth abt a rock

□ A tiny boulder ?

□ Rolls 20 for insight

□ Guy had a flash of recognition but he doesn't have it

® But what r they wearing

® Indiscrete, utilitarian clothes

® "can we search your room or will you tell us all you know"

® "is that a thweat"

® "a thweat? O thorry sorry a threat"

® Adam rolls for intimidation

◊ 9

□ "we could just lasso them"

□ "how much health do they have combined"

□ "ok so you guys aren't gonna tell us anything"

□ As adam turns around to leave he casts sleep

® 5d8 

◊ "is their combined health equal or less than 22"

◊ "together they had 8"

□ Asyna moseys on upstairs

• I try so hard

○ And then things like this happen to me

○ It's fine, I say, albeit wholly unconvinced

○ Wow ok it really b like this

• Adam makes investigation check for anything in the bed

○ 18

○ There's a cut in the side of the bed w a bag of coins

○ "we shouldn't rob these people"

○ Apparently it's not a lot so we leave it

• Going to check other room

○ W8

§ Try to open door but immediately hit smth blocking it

§ Aerana and cel try opening the door

□ 14 strength check; doesn't budge

□ Peeking inside can make out a lot of heavy stones

□ 3 in gap

□ "so we can't fit through it . But a much smaller animal could probably fit through it"

○ Would b asyna's second wildshape

§ Investigate room wd40 but it's w4b

○ Asyna and cel r gonna go to w4b

○ Adam sticks arm through crack

§ Adam gets sense roof has collapsed

§ Feels beam of wood blocking door

○ Dom thinks we're too weak to hammer the door

○ Cel goes first

§ Dexterity save

□ 19

□ 2 damage; steps inside side closet and floor collapses

□ Falls down into w4a on first floor

□ Picks self up and goes back upstairs

○ Gonna try n shimmy over, 10 for acrobatics

§ Starts making way over then falls; dex save 11

§ 2 damage again

§ "uh hearing cel fall from the second floor twice , I come out"

□ Cel is gonna try and jump to w6

□ Adam gets crowbar from cel

§ Adam uses mage hand to open the door

□ Cel can just see a bunch of pigeon nests in w6

□ Cel jumps into w6

□ More pigeons

® Investigates; 20

◊ Finds the odd shiny thing a crow might've brought in; for the most part looks like a bird's dwelling

◊ Some fish bones in one of the nests

◊ Nature check, 5; can't tell what kind of nest

◊ They look like pigeon eggs tho

◊ Whisper yells to asyna "pet pigeon ?!"

◊ "are you gonna throw it?"

◊ "let me just tell you guys right now . You have more than one chance"

◊ Both have to make dexterity checks

◊ There are at least 5 eggs

◊ Cel rolls 22, asyna rolls 16

◊ The egg made it across successfully

◊ Cel just jumps back

○ Adam lightly pats down the two sleeping dudes

§ Some money, small utility knife

§ Gonna crowbar w8; strength check w advantage

§ Adam tries using the crowbar on the hinges, 8

§ Warhammer ? 15

□ 11 damage

□ "ok. Bonk"

□ "screws were invented in the first century so there WERE screws in the renaissance"

® Oil the door, adam tries to pop out the bolt with a dagger

® Two 4s

□ The people we cast sleep on are still asleep

○ Nat20 for athletics check to go onto the roo

§ You go to top of the windmill

§ Drop down into the room

□ Huge collapse of stones from the ceiling, beam of wood propped up against the door

□ Nat20

® Positive there is nothing in the room, just ceiling debris

○ "I'm gonna give their hands a little bondage"

§ "and then jerry seinfeld walks in like 'what's the deal with airplane food'"

§ Adam shakes the more serious-looking guy awake

§ Takes out key and asks if he's seen it

□ Wakes up and says "wot"

□ Other guy wakes up and is flailing

□ Cel rolls athletics check to tie him up

® 14, is able to tie him up

□ Looks at it and says it's his

□ "what's it for?"

□ "none of your business"

□ "you guys have a hobby of graverobbing?"

□ Adam says he's with the citywatch

® Deception check at disadvantage

® 9

® "yeah we're from the watch . Watch your back"

□ "why were u in the mausoleum"

® Jacob makes intimidation check w advantage

◊ 16, more serious one says "well u know we don't normally do that sort of thing"

◊ "we was paid to do it"

◊ "by whom"

◊ Lorsa morclav

} Losser mirklav paid them

�� Asdjdmaf nice

® "what's the key for"

® "it's private"

® "can you make it public? For money ?"

® "45" adam puts knife closer to throat "I'm guessing that's a no" "I'm guessing that's a less please"

◊ Asks if we've played the dnd equivalent of poker

} Adam says he wants names first

} Younger one is urlaster

} Older one is volkarr

□ Threaten to bludgeon toes

® "how connected r u to ur toes"

® "rather intimately"

§ Says he buried his treasure

□ 10 to hit, slams ground

® Adam asks to see where loser mirklav is

◊ Southern ward

◊ By a bunch of apartments

◊ Half elf guy - cellar street ?

◊ Lives in an apartment

◊ "wig shop"

◊ "a weed shop"

◊ "a wIG shop"

§ "did u guys steal anything else from the tomb"

□ "we was hired to steal bones"

□ "losser's a necromancer"

□ Did they pick up a stone ?

® Losser saw a really thicc rat

® Losser kills the rat but it just vanishes, leaving the stone

® Losser took the stone

◊ Insight check, 8; can't tell if he's telling the truth

} "u guys broke into the tomb of a noble family for a necromancer for how much gold"

} 10 gold

} "we're keeping the key"

} "is loser the type of person that stays up at night"

} "well he's a mostly nocturnal fella"

} "yeah he likes his beauty rest during the day"

} "he's a strange little fellow"

§ "how badly do you want this key back"

□ "that's my life savings I want it back"

□ "what does losser look like ?"

□ Halfling fellow w long gray ponytail, he's wrinkly and smelly

® Is it bad that every time I hear the word necromancer I think necrophilia not necromancy

® "yeah I'm licking your life savings right now buddy"

◊ Adam fake swallows

} Performance check, 8

} "you're the worst actor I've ever seen"

} Actually swallows it

} "oh fuck"

} Key is made out of rusty iron

} "alright . Bye"

◊ "do you want your key back within 1-2 business days"

} "why don't you just puke it out"

} "I don't want to"

} "you guys keep quiet, I'll return the key to you in 1-2 business days"

} "that's disgusting"

} "alright . Bye"

– We’re leaving them tied up 

– "wow we're being judged" - marguerite, 2020

– We take their shovel

– "say what was your name"

– "reginald"

– "deception"

w Rolls a 20 total

w "that's shilanda shilanda brilanda and tiffany"

w Nat1

® "it might come out less rusty than it was before"

◊ "hey dom when should I roll for that poison"

§ Cel takes knife, toss the shovels

□ Barricade door ?

○ Going back to mirt's to rest ?

§ Go back to mirt's

§ Fog has settled in over streets, early early morning

§ Make it back no problem

§ Past midnight

□ Rest with watches

□ During adam's watch reads book

® Investigation check, 20

® Details house growlund and their lineage

◊ It's a genealogical book

} A lot of the pages are blank bc it's continuously added to

} At some point it's described that some of the children were born with tails

– "I look at my tail . Then look back at the page"

– But then those tails were amputated

} Any inbreeding ?

– Investigation check, 13

– There was inbreeding

□ Cel keeps pigeon egg warm

§ Morning arrives, daytime mostly spent in fog until noon

□ 8 a.m.-ish

□ "do I have to uh use the bathroom dominic"

□ "is there any key"

□ "oh I thought you were talking about real life"

® "does the key come out"

® "oh my god no it does not"

® "this is a great disaster"

◊ "it was a large key"

◊ "then how did I swallow it?!"

◊ "oh god whatever"

◊ Key was small enough for adam to swallow without choking

} I didn't say this but I thought it: what if he had practice tho

• Renaer is up

○ Cel grabs asyna and adam to go ask renaer to watch their pigeon egg babies

○ He is incredibly confused but he affirms he won't eat them

○ "ey what's poppin mirt"

○ "how's it going"

○ "groot is chunky" - aerana?

○ "groot is the best kind of chunky" - cel

○ "mirt, I'll buy you a wig" - adam

○ "make it purple"

§ Purple like …. : - D ahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahaAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAA

• We bust our way down to cellar street

○ Southern ward is the one where a lot of ppl move to from foreign lands

§ Eclectic

§ We find a small shop w some wigs in the front

○ There's a young half-elf woman running front desk

○ Headstands w wigs in the front, some r purple

○ Adam walks up to the half-elf woman asking for a special order w loser

○ "sorry we don't have anyone by that name"

○ "losser?"

○ Adam wants a private meeting to place an order

§ Insight

□ 16, she looks surprised n confused

○ There was not an apartment above the store

§ This corner is mostly businesses

□ Nat20 wisdom saving throw

® She is uncharmed

○ Has gray hair, smells like an excessive amount of lavender, 

§ Says his name is val

□ Mirklav backwards

○ "is your boss here right now"

○ Lets himself in sometimes to say hi and to check in like once a month but he has a key

§ "how do you know him"

§ "uh do u remember how I said I was throwing a bar mitzvah ? He's invited"

□ 15 deception, works

□ She goes to the back

○ Nothing suspicious looking in the shop aside from the normal weirdness you'd expect from a wig shop bc it's just head mannequins

○ An elf walks in

§ "hey . Yo"

§ He nods

§ Doesn't necessarily look like he needs a wig

§ Wearing a tricorner hat like gwash

□ Makes idle conversation

□ "interesting things happening in the city, eh?"

® Heard abt the house that got blown up

® "oo . What's the juice ? What's the juicy gossip my guy"

® They say some kind of explosion

® Says he's more into politics

◊ "of course he is"

® "well I concern myself w the affairs of princes and princesses"

◊ Talks abt making deliveries

® "well many of them r comfortable . Of late I was able to make a v special acquaintance who essentially helped me w smth I needed doing"

◊ "I'm adam nice to meet you . Is it impossible to explain or "

◊ What's this guy's name tho

◊ Says he's good at making ppl happy or sad ???

◊ "you're like a performer"

◊ "do smth for us"

} He lost his silver handkerchief

– Can turn silver into gold, flicks it

– Admits puppetry is not his particular area of expertise

w Name is Jamboreal

w Nat20 insight check

w Looks different but it's the other guy

w Oh it's the guy the disguise guy your handkerchief bruh you really forgot about your own doings n stuff

w AHAHAHHA I SEE IT NOW OOPS wow I was really off

• Clerk lady comes back in

○ Brings back note of smth

§ We'll just sneak back later at night ig

§ Adam gives her a gold and says he'll take her purplest wig

□ Brings out a fluffy purple toupee

○ Wig shop closes around dusk

○ "do you want this wrapped"

○ "do you want to come to my bar mitzvah ? I'm turning 14"

○ Jamboreal is haggling a price down

§ Concept: take asyna to the zoo

□ Adam runs intelligence check for a 

□ Uh are we going to the zoo ? We're going to the zoo

□ There's a bunch of animals

Pause; next time we’re going to the zoo

[janebennetts]

mamma mia! here we go again songs ranked

“When I Kissed The Teacher”- 10/10 if you don’t focus on the lyrics too much this is a great way to start the movie. 

“I Wonder (Departure)”- 15/10 delightful. made me cry in about ten seconds. a hidden gem and deserved to be in the actual movie.

“One Of Us”- 20/10 REALLY good. Dominic and Amanda both brought their A game to this and it shows here. almost started crying when this played a good ten minutes into the movie. bonus points for the masterful camera work.

“Waterloo”- 11/10 logically, this song makes no sense. emotionally, this song makes me smile. a critic mentioned it would be pretty insane for Harry to come out to Sophie’s wedding after a one night stand and ok, fair. but that dance sequence!

“Dancing Queen”- 30/10 it’s that bitch but there’s a reason it’s that bitch. this song is what “Come On Eileen” is to eighties music for music in general. those beginning notes are the most recognizable and exciting in history. also this cast has NO qualms about a good dance sequence and I’m loving it.

“Angel Eyes”- 21/10 this song is for legends only and so only legends sang it. 

“Fernando” - 99/10 somebody asked me why Cher was in this movie. the answer? to save 2018.

“Andante, Andante”- 16/10 Nothing but respect for MY Despacito.

“My Love, My Life”- 100/10 You’re lying if you say you didn’t start ugly crying here. Is it a dream sequence? Yeah, one straight out of MY dreams.

“Super Trouper”- 101/10 okay to admit my bias this is one of my favorite ABBA songs but the nerve they had to put this out into the world! gets one more point than previous Meryl Streep song because it’s a happy one. 

“Knowing Me, Knowing You”- 13/10 I like the background vocals in this one and I bet you agree. 

“I’ve Been Waiting For You”- 50/10 this is it. the song that lead me from teary to full on crying. Sophie’s singing in the Dynamos to her baby! Her “I’ll be a good mom, I swear” earned this at least an extra ten points. i’m not even going to mention what else was going on in this scene because I’ll cry again.

[blackpinkofficial]

On a modest stage inside a tent in downtown Los Angeles, the four members of the South Korean girl group Blackpink assume a diamond formation and aim their fingers like guns at the audience as they launch into the chorus of their breakout hit, “Ddu-du Ddu-du”: “Wait till I do what I ... Hit you with that ddu-du ddu-du du!”

It’s the afternoon before the Grammys at Universal Music Group chairman/CEO Lucian Grainge’s annual showcase, where he presents the company’s prospective superstars to a crowd of record executives and industry types. (Past performers have included Ariana Grande, Halsey and Shawn Mendes.) With their intense choreography, dance-heavy beats and Clueless-esque high-fashion looks, the four women offer the kind of bells-and-whistles pop production that makes them an anomaly not just on today’s lineup, where rappers like 2 Chainz and Lil Baby abound, but also on the charts, where women like Grande serve up their divadom with an extra dose of realness.

The showcase marks Blackpink’s first stateside performance, though the band made history long before: “Ddu-du Ddu-du” became the highest-charting single by a Korean girl group on the Billboard Hot 100 when it peaked at No. 55 last June, and this April the act will be the first Korean girl group to play Coachella, before embarking on a North American arena tour. “Ddu-du Ddu-du,” sung mostly in Korean, is a boastful warning to those who underestimate Blackpink, with a hook (meant to imitate the sound of bullets flying) that’s also a canny invitation to non-Korean listeners -- anyone can sing the words. The buttoned-up UMG crowd seems a little unsure, but also intrigued: Just as Blackpink’s Jennie -- soft-spoken in person, but onstage a fierce singer and rapper -- slides into a rat-tat-tat flow in the second verse, more and more audience members whip out their phones to capture video.

There’s no longer any question that K-pop is happening in America. BTS, the seven-member South Korean boy band, scored two No. 1 albums on the Billboard 200 in 2018 and became the first K-pop group to sell out an American stadium when it played New York’s Citi Field in October. Yet despite the group’s visibility here, K-pop remains somewhat detached from the mainstream: It receives relatively little top 40 airplay despite fan-army pressure on radio stations, its artists rarely tour with non-K-pop acts, and outside of its intensely passionate fan groups, K-pop stars hardly drive the wider “conversation” that someone like Grande can dominate with a single tweet.

Blackpink represents Korean music’s latest, greatest hope at breaking out of the American K-pop box. The group believes its multinational identity gives it global appeal: Sweet-voiced Jisoo, 24, is a South Korean native; buoyant rapper Lisa, 21, is from Thailand; guitar-playing Rosé, 22, grew up in Australia; and Jennie, 23, was born in South Korea but spent some formative years in New Zealand. “You don’t have to understand Korean to understand the music, the visuals, the vibe,” says Jisoo, through a translator. (Rosé and Jennie are fluent in English; Lisa alternates between English and Korean during our interview.) “We’ve got so much Korean culture and so much Western culture in us,” adds Rosé, her Australian accent still pronounced.

And though occasional English lyrics already pepper their tracks, Jennie notes that recording all-English songs is something they “definitely want to do” in the future. (They’re focused on making their debut album first.) Even their sound -- an omnivorous fusion of fist-pumping EDM and booming hip-hop beats with flashes of house, ’80s pop and harmonica-driven folk -- seems conceived for the widest possible audience. “I was immediately drawn to their fierce and empowering energy,” says Dua Lipa, who asked the group to guest on last year’s bilingual banger “Kiss and Make Up.” “They are not just giving you hit songs -- they are sending a message that resonates beyond the lyrics.”

Last fall, Blackpink signed to Interscope Records, which will serve as both a creative and business partner to YG Entertainment, the group’s Korean home and one of South Korea’s three main music companies along with SM Entertainment and JYP Entertainment. These companies serve as label, management firm and production studio, controlling almost every aspect of their artists’ careers. Interscope chairman/CEO John Janick says that YG’s leadership -- Hyunsuk “YG” Yang, its founder, and Teddy Park, Blackpink’s main producer and creative director -- “runs the show,” but the relationship is collaborative: Sam Riback, Interscope’s pop-rock A&R head, has made multiple trips to YG’s Seoul headquarters and “has been sending them lots of different ideas,” according to Janick. “Our goal,” he says, “is to amplify what YG has been doing globally.”

If Interscope can help turn Blackpink into a truly global superstar act, the partnership could become a model for other labels looking to invest in K-pop and even pave the way for joint imprints. “This deal could be a benchmark,” says YG’s Joojong “JJ” Joe, who heads the company’s U.S. operations from a small house near Los Angeles’ Echo Park. It will also confirm Interscope’s foresight about K-pop. In 2011, the label signed the group Girls’ Generation during one of the earlier waves of K-pop imports, when artists like BoA and Wonder Girls worked with Western producers and companies.

At the time, those artists barely made a dent on the mainstream charts, and their backers took a hit: Despite high-profile promotional appearances, Girls’ Generation’sThe Boys LP sold only 1,000 copies in the United States during its first week in 2012, according to Nielsen Music. Since then, however, streaming platforms have made it easier for fans to discover and support Korean music, while the growth of social media has also allowed them to forge deep connections with artists everywhere. “In this era, people find their music and their talented artists on the internet,” says Susan Rosenbluth, senior vp at AEG Presents/Goldenvoice, who helped book Blackpink’s North American tour and notes that K-pop’s stateside audience “does not follow along ethnic lines.”

To Janick, the success of Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee’s chart-topping Latin hit, “Despacito,” aided by a Justin Bieber remix, made English-speaking listeners more open-minded in general to music in other languages. “We’re going to have hits from all different territories -- more of them, and more often than we’ve seen in the past,” he says.

But the onus isn’t just on listeners to embrace Korean music -- it’s on industry gatekeepers too. At the UMG showcase, the reaction to Blackpink is enthusiastic, but it feels muted compared with the rousing ovation the crowd gives classic-rock revivalists Greta Van Fleet, whose 2018 debut album was notoriously panned by some critics as derivative. The response to Blackpink’s Interscope deal, however, suggests that attitude could change.

“So many artists on our roster started calling, saying, ‘I want to work with these girls.’ Radio stations were asking when new music was going to be out,” says Interscope executive vp business development Jeremy Erlich, who facilitated early conversations between the label and YG (he and Joe attended business school together). “The industry’s ready. When the music comes out, I don’t think there’s going to be many people saying, ‘This is just a fad.’”

The day before the showcase, the ladies of Blackpink are ensconced in a hotel suite high above downtown L.A. Lisa, dressed in a gray fleece and a checkered coat, spies the Hollywood sign through a corner window and bounds off a couch for a closer look. Her bandmates, cozied up in brightly colored sweatshirts and cardigans, admit they weren’t expecting Los Angeles in February to be so chilly. During some rare downtime the previous day, they went shopping in Santa Monica. “It was supposed to be for fashion,” says Jennie, “but we ended up just grabbing anything that was warm.”

This is Blackpink’s first trip to L.A., but it has been almost a decade in the making. The group’s members came to Seoul from all over the world starting in 2010 to take part in YG’s rigorous recruitment and training process. The company and its competitors hold tryouts both within and far beyond Korea (Rosé traveled to Sydney from her home in Melbourne), seeking recruits who are typically preteens or teens, ethnically Korean and fluent in the language, though these qualities are not mandatory. Lisa, who auditioned in her native Thailand in 2010, didn’t speak any Korean when she began training in Seoul in 2011.

For all four women, joining YG meant enrolling in a kind of full-time pop-star academy that Jennie calls “more strict than school” and that Rosé likens to The X Factor with dorm rooms. For 12 hours a day, seven days a week, the future members of Blackpink -- along with, by Jennie’s estimate, 10-20 other aspiring singers who cycled through the project -- studied singing, dancing and rapping, taking part in monthly tests designed to identify their strengths and weed out subpar trainees. “Somebody would come in with a piece of paper and stick it on a wall, and it would say who did best, who did worst, who’s going home,” recalls Jennie, whom YG initially steered toward rapping because she spoke fluent English. “You get a score -- A, B, C,” Lisa explains. “Lisa would always get A’s for everything,” adds Jennie with a laugh.

The process was lengthy. Before Blackpink debuted in 2016, Jennie spent six years in training, Lisa and Jisoo five and Rosé four. For the members who had left behind life outside South Korea, the pace of training on top of the culture shock was sometimes tough. “I’d call my parents crying,” recalls Rosé. “But as much as it was hard for me to cope with all of that, it made me more hungry. I remember my mom would be like, ‘If it’s so hard for you, just come back home.’ But I’d be like” -- she mimics a surly teen’s glare, much to the others’ amusement -- “‘That’s not what I’m talking about!’” Lisa credits her future bandmates with easing her transition. “Jennie would speak English to me, and Jisoo helped me out with my Korean,” she says. Rosé was the last of the bunch to enter training, but she remembers the four of them bonding during an all-night jam session when she arrived. “We just clicked,” she says.

That’s clearly still the case: Rosé sometimes puts her hand on Lisa’s knee when translating for her, and at one point Jennie and Jisoo huddle close together to silently adjust one of their necklaces, displaying the intimacy of close friends. “We don’t really have a day off,” says Lisa. (Once every two weeks, Rosé clarifies.) And because their families are so far-flung, they often spend their time off with each other anyway. “We’re stuck together,” says Rosé, laughing.

While K-pop companies have a reputation for packaging groups assembly line-style, Blackpink’s members insist they have plenty of creative input, despite having no official writing credits on their tracks. Park plays them music he’s working on and “really tries to put our thoughts into our songs,” says Jennie. “He really gets his inspirations from us.”

“It’s important as recording artists that they actually truly own their songs,” says Park. The women all make suggestions about who should sing what, and if a part doesn’t feel right to someone, he will make adjustments. “He doesn’t just bring us a song, like, ‘Go practice,’” says Rosé.

Besides, the members of Blackpink have another creative outlet: Last fall, YG announced that they would all release solo material, starting with Jennie, whose debut single, “Solo,” topped Billboard’s World Digital Song Sales chart in December. Though the music is still created and put out by YG, the idea that group longevity and solo success aren’t mutually exclusive is a radical development in girl-group history -- one that Janick says only “makes the brand stronger.”

Stars who come through companies like YG are called “idols” in Korea and have historically been expected to maintain a squeaky-clean image. When Blackpink debuted, Jennie says YG was very selective about its promotional appearances: “We were trained to be a little more...” “Closed in?” Rosé suggests.

“Closed in” is exactly what the outspoken women ruling the U.S. charts now, from Grande to Halsey, are not -- they make deeply personal, even raw, music. But while Blackpink may well find success catering to an audience craving its kind of TRL-era pop spectacle -- Interscope’s Erlich calls the group “the modern Spice Girls” -- lately the band has been less concerned with appearing perfect, both onstage and off. “We always wanted to be out there, to be more true to ourselves and a little more free,” says Jennie. “Even we can get things wrong sometimes. We want to just show them the real us.”

Jennie and Lisa do just that when I ask how they expect to be received as rappers in America. Lisa lets out an embarrassed groan, withdrawing into her fleece. She has loved hip-hop since childhood and is obsessed with Tyga (“I love his swag,” she says, blushing). But she and Jennie seem well aware that a group of Asian women adopting a style pioneered by black American artists might be a hard sell for some stateside listeners who are keenly attuned to debates about cultural appropriation.

“Me and Lisa don’t talk about it out loud, but I know we have this big pressure,” says Jennie, who adds that she studied artists like Lauryn Hill and TLC when she first started rapping. She looks across the room at Lisa: “She’s going to kill it.” Lisa just scrunches up her face.

That kind of vulnerability may be what ultimately endears Blackpink to an American pop audience. “The artists that are the most successful in these situations are really authentic with how they can relate to a coming-of-age experience” in their music, says Goldenvoice’s Rosenbluth. “There’s a certain amount of authenticity to Blackpink that I really love. The dedication is heartfelt.” 

Back at the showcase, the band finishes its set with the reggaetón-tinged “Forever Young,” featuring an intricately choreographed, hair-flipping dance break. As the beat reaches its booming climax, the bandmembers whip toward each other and strike a statuesque pose with their hands on their hips, just in time for the music to stop. They hold still for a moment as the lights dim, then drop their arms and turn toward each other, catching their breath and grinning like four young women who can’t quite believe they’re here.  

[jui-imouto-chan]

Part 6 of the Mostly Human AU

Level Select:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Connor walks into the DCPD with Conan and Collin in tow, and everyone is immediately confused.

Why? Because the three of them are all dressed in the exact same clothes—Connor’s clothes, more precisely.

“Connor!” Hank calls from behind them, opening the door.

All three of them turn to the door at the shout of the name.

It seems Conan got contacts for this.

It also seems like Connor and Collin both wore heeled shoes to elevate them to Conan’s height, though it took an extra inch for Connor.

They all had an LED on their temple, so it was confusing af

Gavin cries a little bit when he sees the three of them??

He is kinda scared.

He knows one of them is the one he actually (kinda) likes but he can’t tell who’s who from here

The other two can fuck off

The DCPD staff is just so determined to guess which is which.

They’ve tried straight up guessing and the three are so committed they all say that they’re Connor.

Hank’s already knows but he’s not telling anyone, content to just chuckle into his coffee cup as he downs the brew.

Somebody gets so desperate they get one of Connor’s many spare Thirium bags and spill some on the floor.

Two of the Connors go down to analyze.

The third one is ruled out. Must be Conan.

So, they need to figure out which one is Collin and which one is Connor.

Unfortunately, Conan can’t entirely tell the difference either, so they’re both just pushed away from the blood with a firm, “No!” from the eldest.

Conan gets that he’s out of the game, so he takes out his contacts and switches out his RK800 jacket for one that Connor made him, an RK900 jacket.

“Shit he’s kinda hot in that.” Says one female officer.

Collin and Connor hold hands wherever they go, and then switch places when they’re turning corners or doing anything. Still, nobody can guess. Until Ben gets a strike of genius.

Ben gives them sweets, and Conan and Collin both know the game is over.

Connor’s reaction to sweets is just

It’s overwhelming

Cougharousingcough

Collin keeps the jacket on, but he then informs them that there were multiple clues.

His jacket has 60 written on it, while Connor’s has 51.

Connor’s eyes are less gold and more of a milk chocolate brown.

He brings a hand down and squeezes Connor’s ass and then says, “But also, his ass is literally the softest thing, and he doesn’t freak out when you touch it. That’s another way to tell.”

Conan and Collin would freak out if anyone touched their asses, or Connor’s if it’s done in front of them.

Hank choked and threw a stapler at the younger twin, then threw a folder at Conan when he nodded in agreement to Collin’s claims.

It’s time to use some suggestions! Thank you, @manadrite !

Your other suggestions will come up in the next one, since the one I used first is really long.

It‘s during the night, while his three humans are preparing for bed, that Connor hears noise at the window.

He lowers the brightness of his LEDs and settles himself against a wall, ready to get up at any moment.

The last of the lights turn off, the ones in Hank’s bedroom, and the house is cast in shadow.

There’s silence for twenty minutes, and by then, everyone in the house is asleep, sans Connor, of course.

That’s when the window is opened.

Sumo is resting near the bathroom door, and he doesn’t even stir when a few people enter the house.

Connor waits, watching what they do.

He has a call to the Police Department at the ready.

They people are looking through the house, and they start to move towards the bedrooms.

They awaken Sumo, and that’s when Connor strikes.

He’s hyper focused on his targets, he’s tuning out everything but those he needs to protect his home from.

They have guns, and he’s quick to disarm them, disassembling each gun while dodging attacks from all sides.

It’s really hard to fight in the hallway.

He calls the DCPD as he continues to dance around his opponents.

It seems the commotion woke everyone else up, since Hank is standing on the sidelines with Conan and Collin.

Collin has his phone out, recording Connor’s fight.

Conan is giving Collin a judging look.

Hank is too concerned with Connor’s fight itself.

He is shouting out a lot of instructions. “Dodge left! Duck! Kick—atta boy!”

“Dad, this isn’t a like an MMA match.”

“I’m trying to help Connor, dammit!”

Two of the six intruders are already unconscious on the floor, and one of them pulled out another gun they hid under their jacket.

He grabbed Connor and held the gun to his head while turning to Hank and the twins.

“Hank, Conan, Collin, don’t worry! If I get shot, Kamski can repair me!”

“Hell no, we’re not letting you get shot!”

“But—“

“Connor, don’t get shot, you hear me!? That’s a fucking order!”

Connor’s eyes sharpened and he elbowed the guy holding him in the face, which caught him off guard. He swung around the man’s neck, who barely managed to support himself on his feet, then sat in the guy’s shoulders.

He wrapped his legs around the man’s neck and throat and then leaned backwards and went into a handstand before releasing his grip and letting the man slam into the ground face first.

At the same time, he remains in the handstand and kicks at another man close to him, hitting him in the gut. The man is winded, leaning forward and Connor just slams his hand into the man’s now exposed neck and knocks him out.

When Connor looks up, he sees that one of the two men had been taken out by Conan and Collin when he went to attack them and Hank.

He hears Sumo barking and is suddenly remembering that there was one man left.

He just barely dodges the first swinging towards him.

He does something similar to his attack on the guy with the gun, sitting on the guy’s shoulders, but this time he was in front of the guy’s face.

“Lucky bitch” mutters one of the twins

He squeezes the man’s neck between his thighs and cuts off his blood flow until he passes out, and is unable to unwrap his legs until after the man has fallen to the ground.

When he lands, the man’s face is pressed against the center seam of his shorts, making him squirm a bit.

“I don’t know exactly why, but I’m uncomfortable.”

Collin and Conan step on the man’s body as they yank him off of the man’s face, Collin’s phone off and tucked into his pocket.

The police come in just then, and Hank is excused from working tomorrow, since it would be difficult to sleep now and then wake up early tomorrow. They leave soon enough, the intruders with them.

Connor goes to enter sleep mode on the couch

But his humans only just realize that he’s been using the couch the entirety of his time living with them.

Hank says he should sleep in a bed, and Connor tries to tell him that it’s not necessary.

Connor was already in the process of entering sleep mode when the argument began, so his voice was getting slurred and his voice synth made him sound whiny

Conan and Collin then both say they’re willing to share their beds with him.

After a heated discussion, Conan gets to share with Connor first, to Collin’s rage.

Conan hugs Connor like he’s a teddy bear, which is kinda unexpected

But cute

He breathes into Connor’s ear from where he rests his head in the crook of Connor’s neck as he sleeps, and Connor finds it oddly soothing.

Collin wakes Connor up first that morning, gently coaxing him out of Conan’s hold.

Then, once Connor is out of the way, he pours ice water onto Conan’s face

Collin wanted to sleep with Connor first, so this is his revenge.

Hank bursts into the room as Connor yelps in panic, Collin being choked and held in the air as Conan glares at him menacingly.

Hank sighs. “I’ll set up the funeral.”

Then Collin barely manages to say, “This is so sad, Connor, play Despacito.”

Hank joins in on trying to kill Collin as Connor is suddenly playing Despacito over the Bluetooth speakers all over the house, looking confused and mildly terrified.

Collin is using his last few breaths to cackle.

X | Continue to Part 7

O | Save Progress And Quit to Main Menu

——————— •

Wow this is long. Anyway! Suggestions are always welcome! The rest of @manadrite ‘s suggestions will be up soon!

[eldritch-elrics]

MEMES 2018

happy 2019 everyone! let’s take a look back at the memes of 2018.

i decided at the start of the year to keep a running list of memes i saw. here it is!

disclaimers:

they’re in roughly chronological order but not always

some of these might not count as memes

some are probably from years other than 2018, but i noticed them in 2018

mostly tumblr memes but also some from youtube, etc

bolded are the ones that i found most important or prominent, at least in my sphere of the internet

anyway, on to the list

tide pods / forbidden snacks

mcdonalds alignment chart

connect four

un-tumblrized

ADAM!

do you know the way? / ugandan knuckles

fbi agent

knuckles dying

left exit off ramp

somebody toucha ma spaghet

shirtless kylo ren

it’s 2028

pop team epic characters

the return of cat no banana

boo boo the fool

google arts and culture

absolute unit

thinking face emoji, thonking

person at stall with coffee: change my mind

mii channel theme

steamed hams

that’s just how it is on this bitch of an earth

green m&m message

upside down mcdonalds sign

gru’s plan

a song but every other beat

roblox death oof

but go off i guess

gay/bi/lesbian distinguished/functional/disaster alignment charts

russians blocked from tumblr

krusty krab vs chum bucket

globglogabgalab

you guys are just mean

we need a disney princess who x

american chopper argument

braver than a us marine

spongebob nopants

gay keyboard smashing

“mine” by bazzi

hand sanitizer vs 0.01% of germs

the ok sign (gottem)

“click to see a ghost” (it’s not a ghost)

god tier vriska

if you don’t love me at my x

zuckerberg trial

regular couple / yaoi couple / yuri couple

wallmart yodeler

press f to pay respects

todd howard’s wikipedia page

infinity war is the most ambitious crossover event in history

x dies in infinity war

gorls

john mulaney

you know what that is? growth

guy shooting other guy on couch (who killed hannibal)

floating boy chasing running boy

Дpyr

the baking a cake song from lazytown

t pose to assert dominance

is this a pigeon?

lesbians who like thor

bart hits homer with a chair

childish gambino - this is america

yanny/laurel

trumpet boy

person alarmed by powerpoint

i don’t feel so good…

miiverse (who thought it was even remotely okay to put this here)

scene from the good place where janet has a cactus

it’s free real estate

we live in a society

t hanos

chinken nunget

the dancing trickster god guy with the wacky glasses

lightning shapes

standing in lettuce

todd howard in general

ihob - the b stands for burgers

crow talks over smaller bird

despacito

we’ve updated our privacy policy

this is so sad alexa play despacito

big dick energy

human and robot from i robot talking

list of best x characters

fingers in his ass

*snap* yep. this one’s going in my cringe compilation

polite cat

slaps roof of car

let’s go lesbians!!

young thug on the computer

fucking superb you funky little x

characters react to you having a tapeworm

teleportation arg

howard the alien

small your dick

alternate responses to “i love you”

more alignment charts, most notably bitch/thot/bastard edgy/depressed/dumbass

elon musk

different communities shaking hands or fist bumping over a shared thing

favorite character bingo

energy sword sunday

thank the bus driver

gamecube

the comeback of minecraft

fortnite

rabies

asbestos becoming legal

pensive emoji

drake, where’s the door hole?

my two brain cells communicating

twink boutta pounce

kung pow penis

johnny johnny

can you cast obsidian

do yall hear sumn?..

x happened at claire’s

bowsette

responses to “i’d die for you”

manga/anime/netflix adaptation

moths and lamps

bongo cat

x do y challenge

wig

zendaya is meechee

adding lucky luciano to photos

presidential alert

the scp foundation

skyrim dialogue: hey, you’re finally awake

setting other songs to the party rock anthem video

weird flex but ok

youtube outage

can i copy your homework?

attention all fortnite gamers, john wick needs your help

tik tok (i wanna be tracer, hit or miss, why do good girls like bad guys)

let’s get this bread

super smash bros world of light trailer

what sort of pics usually get sent at 3 am? ;)

one taught me love, one taught me patience, one taught me pain

"x, can i have y to do z?” “to do z?” “yeeeees"

a human, a monster, a prince from the dark

pikachu :0 face

detective pikachu

have a seat please. i would like to discuss steven universe with you

chonk chart

i’m making fucking mac and cheese

they did surgery on a grape

fantasy art of a creature holding a sword out to another creature

imagine doing x (this post made by y)

no nut november

frankenstein is the creator not the monster

fallout 76

that’s my emotional support x

tumblr nsfw ban, female-presenting nipples

the death of fingers in his ass sunday

domino effect

big chungus

[betoveringhouse]

Please, Alexa (:p) this angst is so sad play despacito, jkjk but in the effort to get more fluff out here, do the ro's ever feel truly happy with the mc? if they realize it what would be there first thoughts?

urse:  it’d be a sudden realisation, one made as she watched the mc laugh at some stupid thing they were watching together. a little “Oh.” inside. she’d feel a contentment she never has before; a quiet peace in her mind that’s never existed. in that moment there would be no nagging thoughts, no anxieties there to grip her and tell her she’s wrong, that she’s hated and always will be.

dodge: true happiness would be hard for him to achieve, but by god he would try. it’s all he’s ever wanted. to have that moment where none of the bad memories he carries can come up and remind him that life is awful and that never changes. and the moment he couldn’t hear them any more? it’d be some stupid little thing where the mc said something ridiculous and he laughed so hard that he cried.

nina: “This will end. It always does.” she’d find it harder to accept than one might think, given her outwards personality. she’s as much of a cynic as dodge is, and her pessimistic outlook stems from past events, the same as his. but with the mc she’d be able to take that thought, and realise that even if it’s right… so what? everything ends. that doesn’t mean that it never matters. as she made that realisation, she’d probably get all cuddly with the mc and act mushier than normal.

arnie: he’d probably cry. my poor, sweet boy. the rest of the residents probably haven’t ever experienced ‘true happiness’ in their lives, but he has. and he had it ripped away from him, and blames himself for it. sometimes it’s better never to know what you’re missing out on. he’d definitely realise how happy he was just watching the mc sleep. finally knowing that he’d gotten back something he lost, and gained something new along the way.

ray: his realisation would take longer, because he’s so reluctant to acknowledge when things are going well for him. whenever he has in the past, it’s immediately gone downhill. he’d definitely know that he hadn’t been so happy since he was a teen, and would likely recognise what he felt when the mc did something for him. something big or little, it wouldn’t matter. it would be that they thought of him. how long has it been since somebody’s done that?

[strawberryishness]

memes of 2018

So since there are already so many of them and I’m on this hell hole 365 days a year, I decided to keep a list of all the memes 2018 has to give to somehow give myself a reason to procrastinate even more. Now it might not be a full list, so feel free to add more.

The memes of 2018:

- ‘The first meme of 2018 is’

-  Why Would You Say Something So Controversial Yet So Brave?

- the guy who said this made a comeback in which he shoots someone on a chair behind him

- Do you know da wae?

- Tidepods (god, this... I’m, I’m lost)

- Gordon Ramsay: Finally some good fucking food

- Somebody touche my SPAGET

- The road sign one

-  oh haven’t you heard? 

- Lesbians applause

- gorilla channel

- you so fucking precious when you smile edit

- the bowling alley one 

- FBI agent  

- We been knew

 - change my mind 

- actually no, you didn’t 

- evil Patrick 

- #Aliendance

- […] is braver than any US marine 

- Krusty Crab vs Chum Bucket

- Gru memes (update: it got a comeback in April/May, with hey gorls)

- but go off I guess

- presentation guy is back with you guys are just mean

- brackets (made a comeback later in the year)

- if you don’t love me at my, then you don’t deserve me at my

- panting spongebob

- then perish made a comeback

- This face from free real estate

- charts

- [...] lives in infinity war

- is this a pigeon? man (resurrected)

- what’s [month]’s mood?

- Hewwo?

- what’s happening on Twitter 😂

- nah, I’m not with it. Fuck that.

...

- it’s more likely than you think woman had a comeback as well

- hard to swallow pills

- Tom (from Tom and Jerry) dailing

- Kim Kardashian sipping a drink

- my last two brain cells

- yanny and laurel

- the alphabet according to [blank]

- top ten

- That’s so sad, Alexa play despacito (or any other song really)

- annoyed birb ft a crow

- Trojan horse

- this gal:

- big dick energy

- bold of you to assume that [...]

- in my feelings challenge

- Nike commercial

- johny johny Yes papa

- Do you remember? The 21st night of SEPTEMBER (this is not a meme per se, but it is important)

- 👌

- every meme that died because the react channel reacted to it

- bongo cat

- 1 thing 2 say 3 words 4 you [...]

- flip phone guy

- OKTOBER IS HERE

- moth memes

- presidential alert

- the creation of Adam kinda made a comeback? Idk I saw it a lot in different contexts

- Best pirate ive ever seen…

- we are number one guy replacing the drake meme

- shaking hands

- surprised pikachu

- voting 2016 vs voting 2018

- one taught me love, one taught me patience, one taught me pain

- 👀 (Mayhem Miller)

- whatever a mess tik tok is

- brain (don’t say it)

- Scarlet Johansson casted as a poc

- tumblr banning the titties

- honestly there were a lot more but this year has been too tiring and if that’s not a mood I don’t know what is

[killian-whump]

OUAT 2x06: Rewatch Blog

Heeey everybody! Welcome to my rewatch liveblog of episode 2x06, “Tallahassee”. This one’s about the capital of Florida, which is called ‘The Sunshine State’ because there’s a lot of sunshine there when alligators aren’t eating you and/or meth addicts aren’t eating your face off.

Wait, what? Oh, my research team has just informed me that this episode isn’t actually about Florida at all - it’s about beanstalk adventures and flashbacks to Emma’s history with Neal. So no alligators most likely. Okay.

Well, let’s get started!

Well, this is off to a great start already! Every episode should start with Killian Jones tied up in some way, shape, or form. Nice!

“Freakier than I remembered from the story.” YOU AIN’T KIDDING.

“Reminds me of death.” Whoa, now that’s a little melodramatic.

Awww, lookit his face D: “Please untie me missus” *flails at him*

Mmm... Angry untying. That’s nice. The leather’s back. Saucy Hook, yay. “Don’t be afraid to, you know, really get into it.” Haha, he’s so cute <3

I HAVE SUCH A BONE TO PICK AND I’M GONNA PICK IT RIGHT NOW.

Flashback Emma’s glasses really bug me. Like, we see NO sign of poor eyesight in any of the young Emma flashbacks, and no signs of poor vision in present day Emma. It’s like she developed poor eyesight for an isolated year or two in her late teens and it just... cleared up?

Oh, I know, I know, she could’ve switched to contacts. Right. However, we see no evidence of that, either. No glasses in the morning or late at night. No issues with spending an extended time in the Enchanted Forest without access to either glasses or proper contact lens care. No vision impairment on Princess Emma in S6 who wouldn’t have access to glasses OR contacts, etc, etc.

So maybe Lasik surgery? Okay, but how would she have access to an expensive medical procedure that insurance didn’t cover (assuming she even HAD insurance, which, given her age and financial situation, is doubtful)?

It’s like the writers gave her glasses as a cute little character quirk in this awkward “ugly duckling” stage of her life without having any idea how glasses and bad vision actually work. Which would be ridiculous, considering Adam and Eddy both fucking wear glasses.

...and then they went and did it again with Robin in S7. No glasses on her primary persona, but her cursed persona needs them to see. And after the curse is broken... she still apparently needs them. WTF, show?!

Okay, but that outfit is super cute, glasses and all.

Yellow Bug origin story, guys! Is there a ship name for Emma and her car? Like, SwanBug or something? There should be if there isn’t. It’s so pure <3

Hahaha, Neal, you little shit. That grin of his is kinda cute.

~ TITLE CAAAAAAAAAARD!!! ~

Not sure why antis pick on that line of Neal’s about women. I mean, I’m not a huge fan of his, but it’s pretty obvious he’s reading the cop and (correctly) guessing on how to play him to get him to let them off. And Emma even calls him on it immediately - and he basically implies that’s exactly what he was doing. Antis don’t make any sense sometimes.

Okay, not as cute now... kinda smarmy. (Hi Ashley!)

Aaaaaaaaaaaand back to the beanstalk!

Oh, they kinda are getting really into it, aren’t they? Haha.

You know, I find it really hard to believe that Killian Jones would ever use the phrase “Tick, Tock” in casual speech. I’m just saying.

“I was hoping it’d be you.” :D

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ “Don’t think I’m taking my eyes off you for a second.”

“I would despair if you did.” ∩(︶▽︶)∩

One of my favorite Captain Swan moments riiiiight here:

HOLD MY PURSE, BITCH

And he follows after her like an eager puppy. Total subbie.

DRAMATIC MUUUUUSIC!

*sips beverage* Still climbing, huh? Seriously, though. Did they climb that far without talking at all? Or did Hook just chatter endlessly the whole time? Somebody better have written a fic of him babbling at her for hours.

“I love a challenge!” Hee hee! <3

“That’s not perception, that’s eavesdropping.” And he doesn’t deny it, lol.

“No, I’ve never been in love.” Okay, but she’s obviously lying. That’s a terribly transparent lie, Emma. You can do better.

The sniffing face, heehee.

That’s a pretty good ruse, though. I mean, really. People just sort of trust expectant parents. Although I’m sure it worked better 10 years ago than it would today.

Imagine if she’d pointed higher up. “Our future awaits us in... Detroit.” “Umm, lemme point again.” “No, no, that first point was legally binding.”

“I don’t really... sleep now.” Oh, sure. That’s normal.

This scene’s kinda boring :/

♫ Welcome to the laaaaaaaaaand of CGI and Giiiiiiiiiiiants ♫

“What happened here?” I mean, he kinda told you earlier in the episode.

“Giants can smell blood... and I’m always a gentleman.” <3

The cheerful way he says, “It’s rum!” XD

...and now my entire female reproductive system has died. That is the seventh time this month, dammit. This man is a menace.

Milah angst. Someone hold me T_T

I kinda don’t care about Neal’s problems.

I like this shade of lipstick on Emma, though. Okay, actually, I just like that shade of lipstick. Fun KW fact: Whenever I’m out and buy a new shade of lipstick, when I get home, I always discover it’s the same as all the other shades of lipstick I’ve bought, thinking they were different and so pretty. They’re all this color.

Colin sounds weird when he says, “You ready?”

You swing that bone, big guy! The things this show had him do XD

...It’s Jorge!!! :D Hi Jorge!!! :D I love him! I loved him on Lost, too. He’s just got such a lovely smile. He not smilin’ now, tho. Looks kinda grumpy.

“You big git!” Hahaha, that’s the best he’s got, apparently XD “You wanna kill a human, eh? You wanna kill a human?” The way Colin says “human” here makes me laugh for some reason, and he does it twice XD “Come on!”

“Come on then! Come on then!” I wonder if Colin’s flashing back to that role he played as a football hooligan in Love Is the Drug XD

Him popping up. This scene is so silly and ridiculous. I confess, it’s not one of my favorites, because it kinda borders on cringey in it’s ridiculousness, but it’s also unintentionally hilarious, so...

She’s so relieved <3

This is a good scene. I don’t have much to say about it, but it’s a good scene. Laying the groundwork for the big reveal of Henry being in the room. Ooooh. Also, I love Snow looking after Aurora.

And Aurora’s tiara or hair decorations or... whatever that is... is so pretty.

“What’s your rush?” Hahaha, you adorable idiot. “How long do you think magic knock out powder lasts?” “I’ve no clue,” as he sniffs coins like a derelict. “That’s my rush.” Like, why does she even have to explain this to him? XD

“Everything we need is right in front of us!” Everyone always turns this into some kind of big CS line, but I always thought it just... triggered a memory for Emma, hence the segue into the next flashback. They weren’t even really facing each other when he said it, so I don’t think it was intended to be foreshadowing. Just my opinion, though. Not legally binding :P

Nice sword, Jack. Not pompous at all.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Epic scene alert. “That’s a plausible excuse for grabbing me, but next time, don’t stand on ceremony.” Yooou fucking idiot <3

EAR SCRATCH *jumps on him* *rides him home*

Yeah, I know. All the liveblogs are gonna be like this. I’m so sorry.

Emma, too, is wondering what she’s gotten herself into. “Oh no. He’s sexy and absolutely ridiculous all at once. I am so fucked.” I think this was the moment she realized she liked him. That fucking menace.

Ugh. This train is just speeding towards derailment D: I hate storylines like this, when you just know the shoe’s gonna drop and-

Uh huh. Here’s August now, dropping shoes all over the place.

That drove me nuts the first time, not knowing what was in the fucking box.

And why did she have to go to jail? Like, dump her, leave her alone, fine, but sending her to jail is a bit... extra, isn’t it?

Ah, she’s so broken :( Alexa, play Despacito.

“Try something new, darling. It’s called trust.”

WHUMP! It’s whump!!! Buried in Rock Rubble Whump!!! :D

She’s even more panicked this time. Nice.

Jorge is mad.

Hahaha, I can’t stop seeing Jen in the green donut, though.

This scene is all pretty great, really. I forgot I was liveblogging.

Sweet, summer child. You’re so enamored with Emma and the compass and... Aw, geez. This is why Colin’s a menace. It doesn’t matter who he’s playing or what you think of them. He puts these faces on and tugs your heartstrings and suddenly you’re like, “Oh, look at this sweet, sincere little nugget!”

And then this happens...

It’s whump! BUT WHY DOES IT HURT MY SOUL D:

And then his voice shakes a little. “What are you doing?”

“Emma... Look at me. Have I told you a lie?” D:

“Why do this to me now?”

“You’re just gonna leave me here to die? Let that beast eat me, to crush my bones?” T_T

“SWAAAAN!!!!” He’s so fucking scared D: I died.

Hahahaha, SNOW WHITE WITH THE TACKLE.

I love how Aurora’s the only one who asks about Hook XD

Congratulations. You get a car. And a baby. When you get out of jail.

THIS IS THE WORST GAME SHOW EVER.

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUN BIG REVEAL!!!

...and the end! PEW PEW PEW!!! <3

[lokidokeyartichoki]

some kids walked into our apple store today and looked at each other and then looked at the home pod and said “this is so sad, hey siri play despacito” and i pointed at them

i pointed at these 14 year old boys and said “no. you take your memes out of the store”

and one of them was like “i told you somebody who worked here would know what was going on”

so i looked them all dead in the eye and I said “hey siri, play africa by toto” and they all laughed as I stared them down until they left and then i turned to the new hire who was shadowing me 

i turned to her and with all the seriousness i could muster, I looked her in the eye and said “the first thing you need to know about me is I’m a meme loving fuck”

[spitblaze]

Between Mambo No. 5, Despacito, and All Star, which song does each Danganaut like the most?

uuuuuuuuh im just goin with the sdn2 crew bc dn1 could easily just be ‘what do the canon campers like’ and we...still dont have names for the entire dnv3 crew yet and also i feel lazy and sick soooooooo here we go

Alexei: Would probably roll his eyes if you asked but thinks Mambo No. 5 unironically goes hard as hell (hes right)

Lu Chu: has definitely kicked open the door to her room/cabin/bathroom while shouting “someBODY”

Ember: Has bad taste, likes All Star, has a poster of Shrek 2 in her room. Sophia asked her to take it down and she was offended.

Sophia: thinks despacito is more ‘sophisticated’ even though it really isnt, she just doesnt understand spanish

Olympia: Mambo No. 5 is probably on her workout playlist

Vachel: “All Star is a nice song, it’s so positive, why are you laughing?”

Rory: Innocent soul, still has a soft spot for the shrek movies, likes All Star

Lucrezia: Thinks she can sing but she cant, dont be there when she tries to sing her favorite hit song, Despacito

Maxim: none of the above his soul forever belongs to My Chemical Romance

Jackie: if she HAD to choose she’d probably say Despacito is the least annoying one

Millicent: are they the originals? were they covered as gregorian chants? no??? perish.

Leo: Mambo No 5., no question.

Kenchirou: Despacito is the easiest one to make AMVs out of

Alumit: Alumit doesnt get Spanish either so they can put it on and lie in bed with the lights off and pretend its sad

Estelo: Is the only native Spanish speaker of the entire group, only thinks Despacito is okay. Prefers All Star.

Tori: Mambo No. 5 is a JAM

Darius: Has seen Beibs perform Despacito live in concert and none of his friends ever let him live that down

Casimir: “Well, Despacito certainly sounds the nicest, but I’ve found that All Star stirs up the most hope.”

Mallory: Despacito, completely unironically

Kadience:”I CALL THIS NEXT SONG ‘I ASKED MY ROBOT TO PLAY DESPACITO ON A TEN HOUR LOOP AND IT SELF DESTRUCTED BECAUSE EVEN MACHINES KNOW THAT SONG IS BULLSHIT’”

Jack: MAMBO NUMBER FIVE ALL DAY EVERY DAY

Leta/Tworipe/Impy: Mambo No. 5 is a fun song! Their rabbits like it! / Despacito is the only one of the three he can listen to while writing. It’s fine background music. / all star, purely ironically

[littledonkeyburrito]

Internal organs

1. Where is your cell phone right now? Kitchen table

2. How many pictures of yourself do you have on your phone? There are several selfies, mostly while travelling

3. What song did you listen to the most this summer? Whatever was playing on the radio that I heard everywhere I guess. Probably despacito, subeme la radio, and vente pa ca

4. Describe your hands. They’re pretty handy

5. Have you ever been chased by an animal? (If so, which one) A couple of small dogs, a horse (while I had a strong fear of horses, I cried), probably some others that I don’t remember.

6. How many people in your family have blue eyes?  Most of us, except my brother has hazel

7. What’s the longest you’ve ever been on an airplane? Australia to europe is something like 24 hours. But that’s a couple of flights. The longest I’ve been on one flight was Sydney to Doha which was 14 hours and it was hell because the air pressure was wreaking havoc on my guts and gave me the worst cramps 

8. How did you get one of your scars? I was in the UK with my dad and brother when I was 10 and we were staying at a family friend’s house, along with a couple of other family friends. Me and a fellow child were building a little stick cubby house in the garden and we decided we didn’t want my older brother to get in because he would ruin everything, so we made the entrance really low to the ground so you had to slide in on your belly. Anyway, brother was chasing me and I tried to dive into the cubby house and one of the sticks scraped down my back and now I have a faint scar there.

9. How did you celebrate your last birthday? A group of friends and I went to a theme park and then went to a comedy cabaret show for dinner where we consumed a reasonable amount of alochol

10. How did you get the shirt you’re wearing? I probably bought it at a cheap clothing store. It’s a few years old so I don’t remember exactly

11. How old will you be at your next birthday? 24

12. What did you do last weekend? I was in Paris

13. What did you have for breakfast? I did not have breakfast

14. Have you ever been out of the country? Which country? I’ve been out of many of them

15. Have you ever had sex on the beach? No and I really have no desire to get sand in that region.

16. Have you ever dated someone younger than you? Yeah

17. Who was the last person you saw? Lady working at the cornerstore. For some reason whenever I buy a 6 pack of beer she always forgets to put it in as 6 and just scans one. I’m too honest to let it slide so I always look at the price and go, “...for 6 beers?” and she’s like “oh!” and rescans it as the 6pack. I mean, I go into that little store at least once a week so I’d rather not screw them over anyway.

18. Who was the last person you messaged? Anna

19. Where does your best friend live? All of my best friends still live in australia

20. Where did you last go? To the cornerstore

21. Where do you go to school? At a school

22. Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you? Depends on definition of ex but I’m considering (when I’m back in aus) getting back with a guy I had a thing with before I left australia

23. Who was the last person you sat next to? Somebody on the plane from Paris back to Barcelona

24. Do you have any friends that you’ve known for 10 years or more? Yeah

25. When was the last time you ate chips? Maybe a week ago

26. How many people have you kissed in this month? None :(

27. Do you know what you are going to wear tomorrow? No but you’ve just reminded me I need to hang up my laundry to dry

28. What are you doing tomorrow? I need to stop into that telemarketing office and finally pick up my money. Then going to buy some rum and hopefully mandarins too (my grocery store didn’t have any today) and head home by midday to skype with maggie and anna for maggie’s birthday while I get drunk in the early afternoon

29. What color are your socks? Navy blue with little pink hearts on them

30. Last thing you got in the mail? Letter from 2 friends (a couple) asking me to be a groomsman at their wedding next year. They can’t stand the thought of me in a dress so they decided a long time ago that I could not be a bridesmaid

31. Who were you with Friday night? Just me, alone in Paris.

32. How long does it take you to get ready to go out? Up to 45 minutes. Usually about half an hour.

33. Where’s the closest hoodie to you right now? I only have one and it’s on my torso

34. Do you prefer to take your showers at night or in the morning? Mornings because I tend to sweat while I sleep. Obviously less of an issue in winter though. When I’m working I take night showers in winter because I know that if I get in the shower at 4:30am when it’s 5 degrees out, I am never getting out of that hot water.

35. Think back to June. Were you in a relationship? No

36. Who was the last person to be in your bedroom? I don’t know, nobody has been here in a long time

37. Have you ever eaten an uncooked cookie? Do you mean... cookie dough?

38. Is there a place that you wish you could visit? There are so many more places to go.

39. Do you believe that this weekend will be a good one for you? I think it will be the standard boring mediocre weekend I have every week due to having no friends in this country

40. Have you ever fallen asleep on someone? Yeah

41. Are all of your friends in relationships? About half of my close friends are

42. Would you ever eat a bug for 1000 dollars? Sure, give me 20 bugs and you won’t see me for 6 months because I’ll be off travelling. I hear fried crickets are pretty good.

43. What’s going on with you and the last person you messaged? Friend

44. Is your cell phone usually on vibrate or is the ringtone usually on? Ringtone, unless I’m on the train or something

45. Do you sext? I did once and I was surprisingly into it but I think that’s just bc I was really horny at time. Normally, it’s really not my thing.

46. Where are your biological parents? Their homes

47. Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car? Money please. Could spend 5k on a second hand car and still have 35k spare

48. Did the last person you message, message you back? Not yet. Asleep I think

49. Tell me about the last conversation you had with the opposite sex. Wasn’t much of a conversation. It was a guy working in the cornerstore was helping me find a 6 pack of beer that was actually a full 6 pack. For some reason most of them had exactly one missing. I say it wasn’t much of a conversation, firstly because not much needed to be said, secondly we’d both be speaking our second (at least) language, and thirdly he’s deaf so I’m not sure how much he’d hear from me anyway.

50. What is something you always have with you? Internal organs

51. Are you thirsty? In both senses of the word, yes.

52. What room are you in? Bedroom. It’s too cold to not be under blankets.

53. Rice or beans? Rice AND beans (seriously, listen to that song. I heard played by a band in a little beach town in Costa Rica)

54. Last pair of shoes you wore? Maroon sneakers I got from Alcampo for like 7 euros

55. Do your parents swear? Dad sometimes, mum no

56. Are you comfortable doing things on your own or do you prefer to have company? I prefer company when I’m not at home.

57. Do you think travelling is something that every young person should do to gain life experience? If they can. But not everybody will appreciate it

58. Do you have a certain color grape you like the most? Both are good but I tend to buy red grapes with seeds because then they take me longer to eat and they’re a good snack to have while I watch tv shows to keep my hands busy

59. If you could kiss someone right now, who would it be? I’m not too fussy, anyone off the shortlist

60. Would you rather go to a party or go on a quiet date? Depends who the date is with. I do like parties.

61. Type in “[your name] needs” in the Google search: Maddie needs a daddy Reaction: Only if he pays well lmao

62. Type in “[your name] wants” in the Google search: Maddie wants a solo Reaction: a solo of what?

63. Type in “[your name] is” in the Google search: Maddie is back Reaction: Soon.

64. Type in “[your name] looks like” in Google search: Maddie looks like sharpay Reaction: Um?

65. Type in “[your name] does” in Google search: Maddie does mackenzie’s makeup Reaction: I don’t understand what this means. Is this like highschool musical or something?

66. Type in “[your name] hates” in Google search: Maddie hates dance moms Reaction: Can’t say I’ve ever seen it

67. Type in “[your name] goes” or “..has gone” in Google search: Maddie goes to jail Reaction: I wonder what I did

68. Type in “[your name] loves” in Google search: Maddie loves lip balm Reaction: In winter I sure do

69. Type in “[your name] makes” in Google search: Maddie makes friends Reaction: Aww :3

70. When was the last time you wore a Band-Aid and why? A long time ago (more than a year) and probably for a blister

71. A trip to California, the Bahamas, New York, Wisconsin, Utah, or Canada? Canada or NY.

72. Whose house were you at last, besides your own? I haven’t been to anybody’s house in months 73. Any big plans for this summer? Ugh I suppose I have another summer coming up if I’m going back to australia. Plans are working, drinking and trying not to lose my spanish skills 74. Who was the last person you were in a vehicle with other than family? Everybody on the metro today 75. What’s something you need to get done soon? Booking flight back to aus. Need to do some research and also borrow some money first 76. Is your best friend awake right now? She is. And she’s hungover as fuck and regretting everything 77. If I came to your house, could I find any kind of chocolate? There is half a block of dark chocolate w almonds and also a pack of oreos. 78. What size bed do you have? King. It’s amazing and I love it and I want to bring it to australia with me even though I don’t actually own this bed bc it came with the furnished apartment 79. Who was the last person to upload a picture with you in it? According to facebook it was the friend I went to colombia with  80. Have you ever held a snake? Yeah 81. Do you ever wear sleep masks when you sleep or shower caps when you shower? Sleepmasks when I’m doing shiftwork 82. Would you rather go to a beach, an amusement park, or a water park? Amusement park 83. Have you ever kissed under water? Only if a shower counts as technically being under water 84. Have you kissed anyone whose name starts with a M? Yeah 85. Camping with a ton of friends or hotel with a few friends? Camping. It’s cheaper and there’s more potential for misadventures 86. Do you have alcohol in your house? I have 4 beers left and no rum

87. Do you have anything to pay off? I owe mum some money and soon will owe dad too. Won’t take me long to pay it off once I’m back in aus though 88. What are you listening to? Mi Vida No Vale Nada - Genitallica 89. Where did you first hear this song? Youtube bc I was looking up bands that sing in spanish

Last 10 people in your Facebook messages inbox: I’m excluding group chats

1. Anna 2. Brenda 3. Caitlin 4. Dad 5. Joh 6. Torin 7. Maggie 8. Pegler 9. Jenn 10. Patrick

How long have you known 1? A couple of months

When did you meet 2? Probably when I was a baby. She’s one of dad’s friends

When was the last time you saw 3? April when she stayed in Barcelona for a couple of days

Have you and 4 ever gotten into trouble together before? Me and dad? Nah

How old is 5? 28

Have you ever taken a shower at 6’s house? No.

Have you ever taken a dump at 7’s house? christ, almost definitely

Have you ever thought about going out with 8? No, but we made out in a bar like 5 years ago

What about 9? No

Would you ever go out with 10 or ask 10 out? Soz bro, but no

What’s the best memory you have had with 1? We’ve actually only met once in person

What’s 2′s lastname? Lewis

Would you ever take a bullet for 3? Yes, I would take it off the table and walk over and give it to her. Taking a bullet for her.

What would you do if 4 died? Cry 

What would you do if you found out 5 killed someone that you were related to? Well first of all I’d be super pissed. 

Would you take care of 6 if they were sick? Hmm probs not

Would you kill 7 if it was the only way for your other friends to survive? I couldn’t do that. 

Has 8 ever cooked for you? We lived together for 3 years so probably at some point I’ve eaten something he cooked

How many times have you and 9 fought? Never?

Have you and 10 ever cried together? Only over how adorable mass effect characters are

Have you and 1 ever kissed? No

Do you ever dream of 2? No

Is 3 a boy? No.

Does 4 have any kids? well... me, for one.

Do you want to marry 5? There was an in-joke amongst our friends for quite a while that we were already married

Are 4 and 5 friends? No. They met once and Joh drunkenly cried about how he hated my dad bc he said something homophobic. Joh also had no memory of this the following morning.

Who is 6 going out with? No idea Is 7 a boy or girl? I think the best answer to this would be... no? What would you think if 8 became your stepbrother/sister? I’d be cool having him as a brother

What is a random fact about #10? He was once part of a viral tumblr post because he and his younger brother used to look very similar and they had the same profile picture (of the brother) for a while. I was actually there when that photo was taken. If #3 said they were in love with you, what would you say? She is in love with my netflix shirt Is #4 hott? *vomits all over the keyboard* Who is #5 best friends with? Meeeee. jk we’re close but I doubt I’m his best friend.  Does #6 have good fashion sense? Yes. I always feel like I just crawled out of the sewer when I stand next to him. Then again, each item of his clothing probably cost more than my entire wardrobe. Is #7 single? Yes Would #8 and #9 make a cute couple? A cattle farmer and a vegan? I don’t see that working out too well.