#some of these i heard in middle school and changed me forever

[airybcby]

જ⁀♡⊹｡° the world ended when it happened to me

( sae itoshi x fem! reader )

♡ a/n — for my childhood best friends to lover series :)

♡ word count — 1.3k

♡ content — sae itoshi x fem! reader, sae itoshi x fem! reader, angst i fear, goes from childhood to the U-20 game, no real explanation for why sae comes back from spain lowkey evil (canon), rin blames reader for sae changing, rin and reader are best friends, best friends brother trope

♡ synopsis — your whole life you've loved sae itoshi, but maybe childhood love wasn't as glamourous as everyone made it seem.

You were always around the Itoshi brothers.

Rin’s best friend, the annoyingly happy girl who somehow made yourself at home in their lives. Sae used to think you were a menace, a constant storm of giggles and relentless chatter that disrupted the quiet balance of his house.

You had been Rin Itoshi’s best friend for as long as you could remember — a whirlwind of energy and relentless optimism, the complete opposite of the quiet, serious boy who barely cracked a smile. But for some reason, he tolerated you. Maybe even liked you, though he'd never admit it.

Sae, on the other hand, made no secret of his disdain.

“Why is she always here?” he muttered one afternoon, rubbing his temples as you sang loudly along to a cartoon theme song.

“She’s my friend,” Rin mumbled through a mouthful of snacks.

“She’s annoying,” Sae shot back, glaring as you dramatically collapsed on the floor like you’d been shot.

“I heard that!” you chirped, grinning up at him.

“Good.”

And yet, the first time you barged into his room, he didn’t yell.

He was sick, curled up in bed, voice scratchy as he warned you from across the room, “Get out. You’ll get sick, idiot.”

But you didn’t listen. You tiptoed in, holding out a crumpled drawing with three stick figures labeled "Rin," "Sae," and "Me," all holding hands beneath a bright yellow sun.

“I made this,” you whispered, as if speaking too loudly would break him. “I wanted you to have it.”

Sae stared at the paper, throat tight. He didn’t thank you, didn’t smile, just turned his head and muttered, “Whatever.”

The week he recovered, his phone rang. He sighed when he saw your name, swiping to answer as he rubbed at his temple.

“You were right,” you croaked, voice completely hoarse. “I got sick.”

Sae rolled his eyes, but there was a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. Yeah. You could stick around.

By the time you started middle school, you were practically part of the Itoshi household. You and Rin stuck together like glue.

You struggled with English — despised it, really — and Rin tried to help, but he wasn’t patient like Sae. So, you turned to the older brother, begging for tutoring sessions.

“No,” he said flatly when you asked.

“Please?” you pleaded, clasping your hands.

“You’re hopeless,” he muttered, but he still helped you.

Sae pretended to hate it, acted like he was being forced to suffer through your presence. But he showed up every day after school, meticulously explaining grammar rules while you doodled on the edges of your notebook.

Somewhere along the way, he started looking forward to those afternoons.

He liked the way you tilted your head when you were confused, how you brightened like the sun when he praised you for getting an answer right. He liked that it was just the two of you — no Rin, no distractions. Just you and him, your elbow knocking against his as you leaned in close to read from his textbook.

And maybe, in your twelve-year-old heart, you started feeling the same.

When Sae was recruited for the Real Madrid Academy at thirteen, the entire town buzzed with excitement. Everyone said it was a miracle, that Sae Itoshi would change Japanese soccer forever.

You were proud of him. But when you lay in bed that night, staring at your ceiling, all you wanted was to beg him to stay.

To keep being your tutor. To keep being around.

The night before he left, Sae texted you to meet him at the park. You assumed Rin would be there, but when you asked, Sae just shrugged.

“He fell asleep,” he said, licking his ice cream.

The truth was, he hadn’t told Rin at all.

You sat on the bench together, you pouting as you flipped the stick in your hand to reveal the kanji for "bad luck," while Sae’s said "good luck."

“Why are you lucky at everything?” you grumbled, tossing your stick aside.

Sae chuckled, the sound low and rare. He started dribbling his soccer ball between his feet, gaze focused as he said, “You can still call me, you know?”

“Huh?”

“For school stuff. Or... whatever.” He didn’t look at you when he said it.

In your childish mind, that was enough. You smiled, bright and unburdened.

“It’s a promise!”

“Yeah,” Sae echoed, teal eyes flicking to yours. “It’s a promise.”

He left a week later.

Rin fell apart without his brother. You stayed by his side, comforting him through the ache of Sae’s absence. And yet, you hid your phone under your pillow at night, quietly texting Sae about homework or your day.

You stayed by Rin’s side, comforting him, hiding the fact that you and Sae texted constantly. He never texted Rin. Only you.

Two years of texts and rare calls passed, and one night, the realization hit you like a freight train: you were in love with Sae.

You’d loved him since he got you sick, since he bought you ice cream, since he promised you could still talk to him.

You’d loved him since he caught the flu,

Since he drew diagrams in your notebook to help you with prepositions,

Since he made that promise to answer your calls.

One late-night call sealed your fate.

As you rambled on the phone about school, Sae mumbled, half-asleep, “I love your voice.”

You stopped talking, heart hammering, but by the time you opened your mouth to respond, he was snoring.

“I love you, Sae,” you whispered into the receiver.

“I love you too,” he muttered, voice thick with sleep, one eye cracking open to catch your stunned expression.

From then on, you and Sae were together. Quietly, distantly, but together.

When Sae came back at seventeen, he didn’t tell you.

Rin did.

rin-rin: Sae’s home

his text said.

rin-rin: I hope you enjoy that you’ve ruined him

You panicked, blowing up Rin’s phone with calls he never answered, some being sent straight to voicemail after the first few tries. And then Sae was at your door, taller, sharper, his face unreadable.

You burst into tears before you even spoke.

“Please talk to Rin,” you begged, clutching at his sleeve. “I don’t know what I did wrong, but I’ll fix it — please, just talk to him—”

But the look in Sae’s eyes was like ice, gorgeous, but dangerous- unsafe- fated to slip away

“You’re a bother,” he said, voice flat.

You froze.

“Huh?”

“You’ve clung to me since you were a kid. You’re nothing but a disease I need to get rid of.”

You laughed, shaky and desperate. “Sae, that’s not funny—”

“I’m not joking. I’m done with you.”

The wind howled as snowflakes caught in his hair. You collapsed to the floor, hugging your knees as Sae turned on his heel, leaving you crumpled on your doorstep, the door swinging in the cold winter wind.

You lost both Itoshis in one night. And you didn’t even know why.

A year and a half later, you sat alone in your living room, watching the Blue Lock vs. Japan U-20 match.

Rin, your old best friend, was on one team. Sae, your first love, was on the other.

And you stayed home, stuck in the same town, the same life, still struggling with English.

The camera zoomed in on Sae’s face, and something inside you snapped.

Without thinking, you hurled the remote at the screen, a crack spiderwebbing across his perfect, indifferent, calm, beautiful, heartbreakingly distant expression

The TV shut off, leaving you in suffocating silence.

Sae Itoshi had everything he wanted — fame, success, the world at his feet.

And you were still here. Stuck. Left behind.

Trying to understand how the world ended for you, while for Sae, it had only just begun.

You curled up on the couch, burying your face in a pillow as the weight of it all crushed you.

You’d lost them. Both of them.

And you didn’t even know why.

GO LISTEN TO WE HUG NOW BY SYDNEY ROSE NOW!!

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!

[citrusipop]

Pagtingin! . hyun-ju

" When I reveal my feelings I hope your opinion of me won't change When I confess my secrets I hope your opinion of me won't change " - patingin by ben&ben

in which . in which Hyun-ju comes back after the events of the game and she happens to bump into her partner who she left without an explanation.

cho hyun-ju x reader (fem) . angst/fluff

based off . ♡

Strolling through the busy streets, you stumbled upon your favorite café. As you stepped inside, you were greeted by the comforting aroma of coffee and vanilla, wrapping around you like a warm embrace. Sweet bossa nova music played softly in the background, blending with the gentle hum of conversations. It was the perfect day to settle down and work in the cozy atmosphere of the café. After ordering your usual coffee and sweet treats, you made your way to a nearby table by the window.

Taking your seat, you gazed out at the bustling street. Sure, it might seem cliché to some—a solitary figure at a window seat in a café—but to you, it was a small joy. The window wasn’t just a pane of glass; it was a lens into the endless stories unfolding outside. Watching strangers go about their lives, you found yourself imagining their worlds. Two girls walked past in school uniforms—you guessed they were high schoolers, maybe around fourteen or fifteen. Your eyes followed a middle-aged man pedaling his bike, his neatly pressed office attire suggesting he worked in accounting or something similar.

It fascinated you how everyone’s lives were so different from your own. Each person outside that window carried a story you’d never fully know, lives that were nothing like yours—boring, miserable, yet oddly peaceful and happy in their own way. And for a moment, watching them, you felt connected to something bigger, as though their differences somehow brought you closer to understanding your own quiet existence.

Your thoughts suddenly come to an end when you hear a group of people laughing next to you. You wish you had your earbuds with you to drown out the sounds but the gods were against you and made you forget to bring it. Wallowing in your sadness, you heard a familiar laugh coming from the table next to you and it made your mind race, turning to the table next to you…

It was her. For a moment, you froze, your breath hitching in your chest. Oh, how you wished this was a dream—because it certainly felt like one. A dream so vivid, so achingly beautiful, that the thought of waking up filled you with dread. But it wasn’t a dream. The world around you blurred and faded, leaving only her, like the central figure in a watercolor painting.

And then you heard it, her laughter. That soft, melodic sound you thought you’d forgotten but never truly could. It was like a gentle breeze carrying fragments of your past, filling you with a bittersweet ache. That laughter brought you back to a time when everything felt lighter, simpler, and whole. Nostalgia crashed into you, raw and unrelenting, pulling at the corners of your heart.

You wanted to move, to say something, but all you could do was sit there, drinking in the moment. That sound, that sight of her—it was a warmth you hadn’t felt in what seemed like forever. And for just an instant, you allowed yourself to believe that this wasn’t just a fleeting memory or a trick of your longing mind but something real, something you could hold onto, even if only for a little while.

You hadn’t realized how long your gaze had been fixed on her until you noticed she was looking back at you. Her almond-shaped brown eyes met yours, locking you in place. She gave you a smile like before, but your mind drifted to how beautiful and ethereal she looked as the sun from the window embraced her figure. Her hair was tied neatly into a ponytail, the soft simple makeup making her look beautiful. You felt like you were seeing an angel for the first time, you felt like you were seeing her for the first time. And it made her heart skip a beat. You noticed how she excused herself to her friends and she was now making her way towards your table, quickly you moved your laptop and notepad away, your fingers running through your hair as you fixed it and made it look more presentable. 

“Hi…” Hyun-ju said shyly, looking right at you with a soft smile, you looked up from your notepad and gave her a tight smile. Awkward silence filled the air as the tall woman stood still in front of your table, you took notice and felt bad. You motioned your hand to the empty chair in front of you indicating that she can take that seat. Another set of awkward silence filled the coffee shop, the tension was so thick you felt as if coming to this cafe was a mistake. 

“You look beautiful today.”

The words hung in the air, soft but sincere, making Hyun-ju pause. Her eyes flickered to you, but you avoided her gaze, focusing instead on the cup in your hands. Still, the familiar warmth spread through her chest. Hearing you call her beautiful always meant the world to her. It was a reminder that you saw her, loved her, just as she was. Yet, the pang of guilt was unavoidable. She had walked away without a word, leaving behind questions that she still couldn’t answer.

“Thank you,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. Her eyes caught the faint smile tugging at your lips, and something shifted. A flicker of hope sparked within her, a fragile belief that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance to mend what had been broken.

As if on cue, both of you started speaking at the same time, your voices overlapping awkwardly. You exchanged startled glances before bursting into quiet laughter, the sound breaking the tension between you. It was a silly, fleeting moment, but it carried a strange weight. For a second, it felt like you were teenagers again, stumbling through the nerves of a first date. Or perhaps it was just the awkwardness of two people who once knew each other so well, trying to find their footing again.

You stole another glance at Hyun-ju, and the sight of her hit you harder than you expected. The ache in your chest flared up, a sharp reminder of the emptiness her absence had left behind. No matter how much you had tried to fill that void, it had never worked. And now, sitting here with her, you couldn’t help but wonder if that missing piece had always been her.

But words refused to come. Your throat tightened, the lump there stubbornly blocking every thought, every feeling you wanted to voice. The two of you sat in silence, the weight of everything unspoken pressing down. Yet, in the quiet, there was something unbreakable—a connection that time and distance hadn’t erased.

You hear Hyun-ju clear her throat, you glance at her as she says, “I…I miss you, it’s been a while.” It made you smile a bit despite the hurt you were feeling inside, “I miss you too.” You said softly, as your thumb caresses the warm cup of coffee. You never felt this wave of emotions before, something so bittersweet. Sadness and hurt was evident on your face and Hyun-ju can clearly see it. 

Your teary eyes locked with hers. “Funny, isn’t it? It’s been five weeks. Five weeks since I last heard from you.” Your voice wavered, though you tried to mask it with a frown. “And now, here you are, showing up as if nothing happened.” The words came out colder than you intended, laced with the bitterness that had been festering in the void her absence left behind.

Hyun-ju stood frozen, her lips parting slightly as if to speak, but no words came. What could she even say? Would you believe her if she told you the truth? That she had been kidnapped, thrust into a series of deadly games because of her debts and her desperation to complete her transition? That she had watched countless lives end in horrifying ways, the weight of survival pressing down on her with every passing second?

You noticed the flicker of conflict in her expression, and it only fueled your frustration. “Look,” you said sharply, “if you don’t want to deal with this—us—it’s fine. Just say it.” Your voice cracked, but before you could say more, Hyun-ju cut you off.

“Y/N.” Her voice was firm, but there was a tremor in it. “I never said I didn’t want this. Or that I wanted it to be over. You mean too much to me.” Her gaze dropped, her voice softening. “You… you wouldn’t understand. That’s the problem.”

“Understand what, Hyun-ju?” you snapped, your frustration boiling over. “You can’t just show up and expect me to be okay after you disappeared without a word. No call, no text, nothing. Five weeks, Hyun-ju. Five.” Your hands trembled as you clenched them into fists, your voice growing harsher. “Do you know how hard I tried to find you? How much I worried? Don’t tell me I don’t understand when you’re not even telling me what I’m supposed to understand.”

Your words hung heavy in the air, cutting through the fragile tension like a blade. You didn’t want to sound this harsh, but the hurt, confusion, and stress had built up too much to hold back. It wasn’t just the absence that hurt—it was the silence, the unanswered questions, the sense that she had left you in the dark without a second thought.

The tone of your voice cut through Hyun-ju’s heart more deeply than you could ever know. Her chest ached with guilt, the weight of her choices pressing down on her. She had thought leaving without a word was the right thing to do—a way to protect you from the chaos of her life. But now, facing the consequences, she realized how wrong she had been. Immature. Thoughtless.

“I just…” Her voice faltered, barely above a whisper. “I thought you wouldn’t love me anymore… that I’d be a disgrace to you, the way I am to everyone else.” Her words were soft, almost as if she was afraid of saying them out loud, afraid of the weight they carried.

Hearing her broke something in you. You had been so consumed by your own pain, your own confusion, that you hadn’t stopped to see hers. In that moment, you realized it wasn’t just you who had been hurting. She had been carrying her own burden of fear and self-doubt, silently tearing herself apart. And now, her vulnerability was laid bare, raw and trembling in front of you.

“You deserve someone better than me, Y/N,” Hyun-ju whispered, her voice trembling. “You can’t be in a relationship with someone like me—”

Before she could finish, you reached out, gently taking her soft, larger hand in yours. “Stop,” you said firmly, your voice steady but full of emotion. “I don’t care, Hyun-ju. I don’t care about any of that.”

Your thumb gently traced small circles over her hand, grounding both of you in the moment. “I love you for who you are. Every part of you. To me, you’re perfect—the most beautiful woman in the world. And honestly, it amazes me every single day that you chose someone like me to be with you.”

A tear slipped down your cheek as you gave her a soft, heartfelt smile. It wasn’t just your words that spoke—it was the way you looked at her, as if she was the only person in the world who mattered. 

Hyun-ju let out a choked sob, gripping your hand tightly as if you might disappear. “I just… I thought that one day you’d wake up and realize you deserve someone better. That—That you’d see I’m not enough for you because I’m not perfect.” Her voice cracked as tears spilled freely down her cheeks. “This body… this body that I’ve fought so hard for, it’s still not enough. People look at me and see a lie, a joke. I thought maybe one day you’d see me the same way, and it would break me, Y/N. It would destroy me.”

Her words came in waves, each one laced with years of pain and fear. “You deserve someone who doesn’t have to fight to exist. Someone who doesn’t carry the kind of baggage I do. I’ve seen the way people stare at us when we’re together. The way they judge you just for loving me. And I thought… maybe you’d get tired of it. Of me. Of always having to defend me, to fight for me. I thought you’d leave, and I didn’t think I’d survive it.”

Her voice grew softer, trembling as she continued. “You have no idea what it’s like… to constantly wonder if the people who love you will stop when they finally see you for who you really are.”

The raw vulnerability in her words cut through you like a knife. God, it pained you to see her like this. Without hesitation, you rose from your seat and moved to her side. Kneeling down, you gently placed your fingers under her chin, lifting her face so she could meet your gaze.

“Oh, love,” you murmured, your voice soft yet steady. “I will never, ever leave you. Not now, not ever. Do you hear me?” You brushed away the tears streaming down her face, your touch gentle and reassuring. “You are enough, Hyun-ju. You’re more than enough. You’re the bravest woman I know. You’ve fought battles most people couldn’t even imagine, and you’ve come out stronger every time.”

You gave her a soft smile, hoping it could reach the cracks in her heart. “You’re my Hyun-ju. The one who fills my life with warmth and love. The one who makes those incredible meals so I don’t have to spend a dime eating out. And the one who makes me laugh when I don’t even think I can smile.”

Your thumb stroked her cheek as you looked into her tear-filled eyes. “I don’t care what the world thinks, or what anyone says. I see you, Hyun-ju. I love you. Every single part of you. And nothing, nothing will ever change that.”

In that moment, you weren’t just offering her words—you were offering her a piece of your soul, a promise that no matter what storms came your way, you would face them together.

“I love you, Hyun-ju. All of you. Your body, your personality—everything. I love you,” you whispered, your voice steady and filled with sincerity.

You leaned in slowly, giving her a moment to meet you halfway. As your lips met hers, the kiss was tender, a gentle melding of emotions rather than just a physical gesture. It was soft but full of meaning, as if you were pouring all the love, reassurance, and devotion you felt into that single moment.

Her lips trembled against yours, and you could feel the faint taste of salt from her tears, but neither of you pulled away. Instead, you cupped her face with both hands, your thumbs brushing away the wet trails on her cheeks. She responded hesitantly at first, as though afraid to believe this was real, but then her hands found their way to your arms, holding onto you as though grounding herself in your presence.

When you finally pulled back, your foreheads pressed together, her breath mingling with yours. “You’re my everything, Hyun-ju,” you said softly, gazing into her tearful eyes. “Always.”

“I love you too.”

You smiled softly, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to her cheek. “How about I buy you that favorite dessert of yours?” you offered, your voice light and filled with affection.

Taking her hand in yours, you gave it a reassuring squeeze before flashing her a smile—one of those rare, genuine smiles that you saved just for her. It was the kind of smile that spoke volumes, one that told her she was cherished, loved, and safe with you.

As you walked out of the café, your gaze lingered on Hyun-ju, unable to help but admire her once more. You silently thanked the gods for blessing you with such a wonderful partner, vowing to do anything for her.

a/n . i told myself I was going to make a part two of mesmerized but I honestly got kind of lazy...and this prompt I could not stop thinking about it. This is my first time writing angst since i'm more of a writer who loves writing tooth rottening fluff....LOL

[phant0mth1ef]

are we still friends? can we be friends? are we still friends? i’ve got to… know. (pt. 2 to the feeling that i’m losing her, forever). part 3

to say you didn’t expect to see a pair of bright red eyes staring you down as you walked into the facility was an understatement, you hadn’t made eye contact with those eyes in over a year, and you flinched the moment you realized just who you were looking at.

you’d stumbled into inasa once you snapped out of your daze, catching yourself quickly as your cap hit the floor, the boy using his wind in order to float it back onto your head.

“thank you.” you mumbled before going to take your spot in line, coincidentally right next to your former best friend.

“why haven’t you called me?!” so now he wants to begin a conversation.

“been busy.” you shrugged, refusing to even look at him because you knew you’d start crying the moment you met his eyes again.

“okay? you could’ve texted me or some shit!”

“my phone stopped working.” you were competing for the title of nonchalant final boss at this point with how casual you were being.

“bullshit. i saw you with it at the exam! just tell me why you’re avoiding me like the plague.” it may not have looked like it, but bakugou was scared out of his mind. you’d changed since the licensing exam, he could sense it in the way you carried yourself. you were being cold.

“what the hell happened to you?? you used to always call me, always text me. what happened?” did he seriously not know what happened?

“you happened.” and that was all you were able to say before the proctors for the training session entered the room, quickly commanding you all to stand in line as your face changed to a softer expression.

it was a casual sparring session, so why were you sending rocks the size of boulders his way? his mind was too clouded to even dodge them effectively, the words you said still playing out in his mind as he mindlessly sent out explosive attacks.

you’d tried to pack up as quickly as possible afterwards to avoid a confrontation with your former best friend, but you heard the clanking of his boots hitting the ground and just let out a sigh.

“what?” you snapped.

“what me? what you!” he was starting to get angry, the way he would get angry back in middle school.

“what about me?! you’re also at fault here. i was the one always trying to get in contact with you! i just grew up and realized that if you wanted to, you would.” you begun to shove all your things into your duffel bag, accidentally smashing your fist into the ground.

“what the hell does that even mean?! you’re the one who stopped calling me outta nowhere. i didn’t tell you to do that.”

“don’t you get it?! i was the one always calling!” you shoved your bag to the floor as you stood up straight, your voice getting strained as you finally made eye contact with bakugou.

“i was the one who always had to start talking to you first! it made me feel like a nuisance. and then one day i hear you telling your new friends that you think i’m annoying? like what the fuck, katsuki. none of this is my fault. if you’d just been a man and picked up the phone, this could’ve been avoided.” you had a habit of crying once you got frustrated, so naturally the tears were threatening to fall from your eyes.

he didn’t have any words, letting out a scoff as you picked up your bag and shoulder checked him on your way out, sending him stumbling back as he just stared at the ghost of your presence.

later that night he sat in his dorm room, his finger hovering over your contact but never once pressing on it, unsure of what he’d even say if you decided to pick up.

“i mean how the hell am i supposed to apologize? she’s so confusing. like damn sorry i called you annoying but it isn’t even that big of a deal anymore that was months ago!” bakugou was ranting to his little group of friends that were huddled on his floor, suprised that the boy would even invite them, let alone drone on about his issues with the friend that none of them even knew about.

“so you called her annoying but you didn’t know she was listening?” mina spoke up.

“yes but that was months ago! i don’t even know how to talk to her anymore because she won’t listen to me.” he sprawled flat on his bed.

“sounds like you’ve dug yourself a deep hole bakugou.” kirishima said, a hint of disappointment in his tone.

meanwhile, back at shiketsu, your group was currently huddled in camie’s dorm, and you sat on the bed while they formed a circle around you.

“i don’t know who he thinks he is but i am not going to beg for him to be my friend, i am not going to be as pathetic as i used to be!” slow teardrops fell from your eyes as you recalled back in middle school when bakugou found more friends and slowly begun to leave you behind.

“i know, and i get that, but you should at least try to give him a chance. he’s making an effort.” she tossed you your phone that was sitting on the desk, a notification on the lock screen.

[kats 💥🫂]

Meet me at the spot tomorrow. Please. 4 PM.

tags; @riverozada @lupitalove @msjaeger @aintseennothinyet @wendeeeee ask and you shall receive sorry if its kinda bad 😢😢

[preciousjoongie]

↯ MAKE HER TAP OUT ↯

↯ if you hatin', you just need some pussy

↯ synopsis ⇝ jaehyun, your enemy, challenges you and sees how long you can hold off being edged.

↯ warning ⇝ smut, enemies to friends with benefits, college setting, edging, overstim, squirting (all f!receiving)

you were perched against a tree in the middle of campus, a large textbook laid out in your lap. your face was a picture of stress with the way your eyebrows furrowed and your nose was slightly scrunched.

"having trouble?" an annoyingly smooth voice rang out, pulling you out of your deep state of concentration. a shadow of a tall but sculpted figure was casted a shadow on you and your books. if this wasn't going to make you go insane, he would.

rolling your eyes, you looked up at him. jeong jaehyun. the most annoying person on campus. or should i say on earth. you two went to high school together but he never really acted like this. he was actually on the shyer side, only having up to 3 friends. but now that he's gotten into college, he tries to act like he's been this way forever.

yes, people can change. but you didn't really expect it to be jaehyun. you excepted him to be a nicer and kinder person but this.. this was bullshit. you should've stuck with your gut feeling and just kept yourself trapped inside of your dorm room all day.

"i'm perfectly fine," your voice was monotoned and laced with annoyance; it made him chuckle. "why do you hate me so much, baby?" you weren't gonna lie and say that him calling you that didn't make you feel some type of way. regardless, you wasted no time to give a response, "maybe because you're an asshole."

you roughly closed your text book and picked up the rest of your supplies, stuffing it all in your bag. jaehyun looked around at the other people in the park, "you don't have to be so loud, you know? it was just a question." he looked back down at you. you got up, throwing your bag over your shoulder. "yeah, well, regardless of how i say it, you're still an asshole."

"maybe i'm not an asshole. maybe you just think i am." he said, trying to match your quick pace. "why are you following me?" you said, now walking down the empty and concrete path you take to get to your dorm.

completely ignoring your question, he brought up something that made you want to snap his body in half. "or maybe you're just mad that i won that scholarship and you didn't." you stopped in your tracks. he stopped just a couple feet behind you.

you turned around, "yes, that is why i'm angry. your family is so rich that you could buy my entire bloodline. and that scholarship was the only i could afford to come here! this is one of the most prestigious schools in the world and i could've had a full ride if it wasn't for you. now my family is in life long debt and if i don't become successful then i'm done for." you threw your hands up and brought them back down, softly hitting your plush thighs.

he sighed, always feeling bad about stealing that from you. "now, please leave me alone so i can become successful and save my family." you turned back around and continued walking. but you came to a halt again as you heard jaehyun speak. turning back around, you saw him walk closer. "i'll pay it off. all of it." his hands in his pockets.

you wanted to tell him off and tell him that you didn't need his sympathy money. but in reality, you did. you needed all the money you could get. "only if you can do one thing." and there's the catch. part of you knew it was too good to be true. "uh-huh." you mumbled.

he stepped forward, hovering over you. "i wanna edge you, see how long you can last. and if you last longer than my timer.. then, yeah, i'll pay it off. but if you tap out before then.. bye bye money." his voice was low and cold. you could tell he meant it.

your face shifted into disgust, shaking your head. "fuck you, jeong jaehyun." you said before walking off to your dorm room. he watched you walk. walked the way your hips swayed and the way your hair slightly bounced as you did. he knew if he were in front of you, he'd get to see your round tits bounce as well.

it's been hours since that interaction with jaehyun. you sat at your desk, working on your math when you got a call. it was your mom. "hi, sweetie," her sweet voice sounded. "hi, mom." a smile beamed across your face.

you heard a heavy sigh come through the speaker of the phone. uh oh. that's not good. "is everything ok?" you asked. "well, your father and i would lie to you and say it is but, it's not. honey, you're gonna have to come home after this semester. we can't keep taking out loans from the bank. we are so sorry." your moms voice was shaky and she was hesitant to speak.

you pursed your lips in order to try and hold back some of the tears that wanted to fall. you sniffled before speaking, "it's ok. i understand. t-thank you for telling me..?" you didn't know what else to say.

after your mom hung up and you wiped your tears, you remembered what that giant pervert said. how hard could it be to last a couple minutes being edged? you sighed, can't believe you were actually about to do this.

you quickly walked out the door, going down the single suites downstairs. this is what you could've had if jaehyun hadn't have stolen this from you. "hey, hey, do you know where jeong jaehyun stays by any chance?" you asked one of the boys on the hall.

"last door to your left." he said. you quickly thanked him, almost sprinting down the hallway. as you got there, his door was decorated with blue stickers. you rolled your eyes at how childish the stickers were. you took a deep breath before knocking, trying to not think about it, knowing if you thought about it, you would've ended up back in your dorm room and packing.

about 10 seconds later, the door opened to a wait haired and shirtless jaehyun. he smiled. you huffed, pushing him into his room and closing the door. "look what the cat dragged in," he smirked with a cocky laugh.

"are we gonna do this or what?" you were impatient. not to be touched by jaehyun but to just live a life where you don't have to live in debt and where it's not eating you and your family alive.

"someone's eager." he ran a hand through his hair. you crossed your arms and your head fell back. he licked his lips looking at you before grabbing his phone. "c'mere." he gestured. you walked over to him, looking at a spiny wheel on his phone. each section had a different number from .30-5 hours. you tapped the middle to spin with furrowed eyebrows, rolling your eyes after.

it stopped on two and jaehyun nodded with a smile. "i'm confused, what does this mean?" you looked up at him. "2 hours. that's how long you belong to me, doll."

"2 hours? what!? and what do you mean by "belong to you"!?" you exclaimed loudly. he threw his hands up, "you work for what you deserve." you huffed before inhaling, ready to finally tell him off but before you could do that he pick you up, throwing you over his shoulder as if you were a sack, "yeah, yeah. i've heard enough of you running your mouth today. how about we hear some of those pretty moans instead." he entered his bedroom, closing the door. setting you down on the bed, and standing in front of you, you started your shit again. he was so tired of it.

"oh, you are such a pervert." you bit back at him. he quickly shut you up by pushing you backwards on his bed. a small shriek rang through jaehyun's ears after action. you sat up on your elbows. "i'm gonna take these off, okay?" his voice was softer, changing the whole mood from tense to calm. you nodded, not even hesitating. you laid back down fully, not even wanting to watch.

jaehyun slid down your shorts and your underwear in one swift motion. you felt so bare, your face heating up and your eyes widening. it went silent after the clothes hit the ground. sitting up, you saw jaehyun staring at your pussy in awe. he bit his lip before looking up at you with a smirk. "you're so wet, baby." he cooed before taking two fingers and running them through your folds. you hissed, your reaction making jaehyun's dick grow harder.

"i can't believe i have finally have you to myself." finally..? your face had confusion written all over it but since jaehyun had already started the timer, you didn't wanna annoy him anymore. he would've probably been an asshole again and added more time if you did.

"ready?" he asked, teasing your tight hole with two fingers. "yes," you squeaked out. he immediately, but slowly, stuck his fingers into your leaking cunt. a stunted groan echoed in the room. he curled his fingers, while quickly pumping them in and out of you. you furrowed your eyebrows and opened your mouth to moan but nothing came out for a second. that was until his long fingers brushed that sensitive spot in your pussy. you moaned loudly, now letting them flow out. his cold rings pressed against your clit, making you shudder but also bringing you closers as they gentle rubbed against it.

"j-jaehyun," you cried out. the sound of your wet pussy being finger fucked echoed throughout the room. "fuck!" you shrieked as you felt yourself about to cum. he saw the way your legs started to close are his arm and how your pussy did the same around his fingers.

he couldn't have that. he wouldn't. he quickly pulled them out before you could cum. a small whine left your lips. you tried to rely on rubbing your thighs together to get off. "good girl. good job, letting me know how your gorgeous body works." he stroked the inside your thigh, trying to calm you down a bit before he got back at it. maybe he's not much of an asshole as you thought... you were still going to assume though.

you didn't hear when he dropped to his knees. all you could focus on the small twitches of your walls and your involuntarily clenches around nothing. that was until you noticed warm air blowing on your pussy. before you could even lift your head an inch, a long stripe was licked up your pussy. jaehyun's tongue was flat. his hands gripped your thighs to stop you from moving your legs.

"ah, shit." you whimpered. you pulled up your shirt, and started to softly pinch your nipples. you were doing even more damage to yourself but you couldn't help it. you moaned as receiving pleasure from two different parts of your body. sure, you've played with your pussy and nipples at the same time but having someone eat you like this while you pinch your sensitive buds made it feel so much better.

your hand reached down to grab his hair. he was slurping up your juices so loud, like he was trying to quench his thirst. he shook his head into your cunt softly. you couldn't stop the lewd noises that came from your pussy and your mouth.

jaehyun was so into it. he couldn't care less if you came right now or not. he wanted to taste your cum so bad. but he knew to not let you go that easily. he wanted to work you up and break you back down over and over and over again until your body was shaking underneath him. until your body was like jello. he wanted to see you shattered. he wanted to make you tap out just to get him to stop.

he groaned into your pussy at how good you taste, "holy, fuck." he pulled away from your puffy pussy to mutter. your pussy was so wet and sticky since was covered in your juices and his spit. all thanks to him.

he drove right back in, not wanting to pull away from it again. his tongue fucked into you so deeply and when he softly nibbled or sucked on your clit, it drove you up the wall. "ah, fuck. jaehyun.." you legs started to close again making him pull back. you let out a groan, your high slowly faded away again.

that's how it was for next hour and a half. he would do anything and everything to push you close to the edge and pull you right back. he fingered you multiple times, sucked your tits and even used a vibrator he bought an hour before you even showed up, just knowing you were coming.

you body was shaking as jaehyun was back at eating you out. your body shook with every slurp, feeling his (now warm) rings at the rim of your hole. "jaehyun.. i cant do it anymore. it's too much for me," you staggered out. tears were flowing out of your eyes from some many rejects.

"come on, baby. i know you can do it." he tried to encourage you but it wasn't enough. your legs were too weak to tighten around his head. your hand left his hair to hold on to the covers that were soaked at the end from all your juices. but they're about to be soaked even more.

your core started to tighten but in a different way. it felt like you were gonna piss on yourself. "jaehyun.." you squeaked out which he hummed to. "jaehyun!" that's when hit the bed three times, tapping out. it was kinda of too late since the moment you tapped out, you squirted. it covered the bottoms of your thighs, the bed, and on jaehyun's chest and the bottom of his face and neck. you could hear the faint sound of your arousal dripping on the floor.

jaehyun licked his lips before smiling. embarrassment flooded your body as you thought you just pissed on him. "you just fucking squirted." he sounded amazed. which he was. he'd never made a girl squirt before. and him doing this, this was like an accomplishment. he chuckled a bit.

when you found out you just squirted, you felt relieved. but suddenly, you felt dread. you basically came before the timer. you wanted to sit up and say something but your body wouldn't allow you. jaehyun stood up and looked at your body. "oh, you look so beautiful, baby." he rubbed your thigh.

"look at this mess you made." he said gesturing towards his body. his abs were covered in your juices. you held back the whimper in your throat. even with your body feeling like shit, you couldn't even look around just using your eyes, you wanted to fuck jaehyun. you don't care if you have to tap out in the first second.. you wanted to feel him inside of you.

"fuck me." you whispered quietly. jaehyun didn't let you see the shock that went through his body. he thought you'd had enough and to be honest, he was going to let you rest for the rest of the week. knowing damn well you need it.

jaehyun's shorts weren't on for much longer. his cock was now stuffed deep inside of your swollen and abused cunt. you let out a strangled moan as his hips rubbed against your clit. your hands wrapped around his neck. he moved quite slow at first until you asked him to go faster. he waited for you to say that. his hips snaps forward, his abs contracting with each thrust.

by the end of the night, or early morning, you were burned out. completely. jaehyun had to help you bathe and get back into your clothes. he laid you on the couch while he changed the soaking bedsheets. he brought you back into bed, laying next to you.

"don't worry. i was going to pay it regardless. and i know i'm a big pervert. but i'm a big pervert with a crush on you." he whispered as you had finally fell asleep, playing with your hair.

divider credits: @adornedwithlight

[jaylver]

YOU BELONG WITH ME — Y.JW

synopsis: The boy next door was practically everyone’s dream. Straight As and top of his class, basketball captain, popular kid with a heart of gold, who wouldn’t want him? Yang Jungwon happened to be him, your childhood best friend who you’ve been pining for almost forever. But how could you compete when you were the complete opposite of his girlfriend? Except that you’ve been there in his life all along, the one who understood most. All you could think was: you belong with me.

pairings: non-idol!jungwon x afab!reader

genre: childhood best friends to lovers, boy next door + athlete jungwon, romance, very very slight angst, fluff

warning(s): profanities, both are kinda idiots xx

wc: 3445

a/n: yes, this is based on tswift's you belong with me song + mv 💓 (please tell me you're not sick of me and tay atp) tbh this was originally a hee fic (idk why he always inspires a lot of fics for me LMAO) but i wanted to change it up! hope you enjoyed it! please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah muah!

masterlist | © jaylver all rights reserved.

You were down bad. 

That wasn’t a statement, it was a fact.

Nothing could simply hide the fact that you were down bad and feral for your neighbour. Yes, you heard that right, the neighbour. And no, your neighbour doesn’t happen to be someone who was on the edge of deathbed kind of old, but he was, in fact, the same age as you, which didn’t help the ample amount of delusions that you could actually get him. 

Yang Jungwon. 

He wasn’t just an average boy next door, he was your childhood friend, who you knew since he moved in when you were six. Naturally, his mum and yours became buddies and it was a big factor in pulling you two together. As you grew older, you and him got closer and were practically stuck to the hip. The downside of highschool and Jungwon looking as though he was personally carved by Greek Gods was that he got popular instantly, while you, on the other hand, was regarded as a simpleton. 

To be fair, you get it. Jungwon was a smart guy other than his obvious charming features and particularly those dimples. Gosh. He was a perfect straight As student, a student loved by teachers and his peers. What made him even alluring was his athletic abilities as well. Wasn’t it just cruel to others to be absolutely blessed both academically and athletically? Captain of the basketball team who’ve won many championships and tournaments. Right, you finally understand why you’ve got to fight other girls for him. 

High School was hell. Being splitted into either the popular kids or the nerdy kids, you happen to be stuck in the middle. Jungwon was off with his popular bunch and you were with Sim Ja Yun, or Yoon, your platonic soulmate that you found equally dying in Maths class. Without her, you were never surviving this hell hole. 

You would be lying if you said you didn’t miss hanging out with Jungwon. Now that you were in two different friend groups, you only got to see him after school or during the weekends. But at least there was a fun part to it, considering how his window faced yours and you two ended up creating this new way of communicating where you would write on either a whiteboard or a piece of paper.

There were ‘how are you’s and ‘good’s and some random rants, most of these ended up being something sentimental to look back to, and they were piled up in a small section in your drawer. 

“Did you hear? Jungwon’s dating that popular cheerleader,” Yoon nudged your side, whispering quietly as you two made your way to Chemistry. 

“Wonyoung?” you exclaimed, a shocked look on your face. 

Jang Wonyoung, the cheer captain of the school, an equivalent of Regina George that practically ran the school without saying. She was the total opposite of you: she wore short skirts, you wore t-shirts; she was cheer captain, you were on the bleachers; she wore high heels, you wore sneakers. How cliche could this be? Of course it had to be the cheer captain and the basketball captain that got together.

Yoon nodded. “Out of everyone, it had to be her. She’s literally known to be a serial cheater.”

Jungwon deserved better. That was all you could think during the entirety of Chemistry. Why didn’t he tell me? Was this new? Countless thoughts filled your mind till the point you swore you were seeing stars. At the end of the day, you concluded it was none of your business, seemingly reaching ‘acceptance’ in the five stages of grief. Maybe this was an actual sign for you to finally stop harbouring a small teeny liking towards Jungwon. Just maybe.

Sitting by the window and staring out into the dark skies completely distracted you from the fact that Jungwon had entered his bedroom right opposite your window. He was the phone, face twisted and expressions screaming out the signs that things didn’t seem to be well. He was yelling something back before hanging up with a sigh and a frustrated ruffle of his hair. 

It took a few minutes for him to recollect himself before regaining composure completely. You pretended you didn’t see the whole commotion when he sat on his bed, facing towards you and your window, casting you a smile and waving at you, to which you reciprocated. You couldn’t help noticing the disappointment on his face.

You reached over for your notepad, scribbling on it quickly.

‘You okay?’

His face instantly lit up, beaming happily, contrary to the expression from a minute ago. 

It was his turn to write something down on his notepad.

‘Tired of drama.’

You then wrote your reply.

‘Sorry :(’ 

He shrugged, shaking his head slightly. You wished you could do something to help, but simply, there was nothing.

‘I like—’

You found yourself writing those words of confession unknowingly, as if your hands knew what your mind constantly thought of. You didn’t even finish writing it, you couldn’t. By the time you glanced up, Jungwon was gone and a shade of blue covered his window.

Well, there goes another chance.

It might’ve been a typical Tuesday night, but that wasn’t stopping you from staying up and acting insane. You were lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with your headphones plugged in. The late night was calm and peaceful, no schoolwork, no trouble, no crush to mull over about, you were finally alone and at peace. The upbeat songs blasting into your ears had you jumping from your bed and dancing around, feeling as if you were the only one in the world.

But you weren’t the only one. 

Unbeknownst to you, Jungwon was by his window secretly looking at your dancing figure who mimicked a singer, a smile on his face.

If only you knew.

Sitting alone in your own front yard shouldn’t sound as depressing as it was. 

You thought the best self healing method was getting in touch with nature like what those magazines had claimed, but it was only making you seem pathetic to people that drove past. Plus, how could you achieve peace when the person who destroyed it countless times was walking in your direction towards you.

“Hey, hey,” Jungwon greeted, dressed in his worn-out jeans and a white t-shirt.

“Hi,” you replied, patting the empty spot next to you.

“You’re reading ‘Pride and Prejudice’?” he wondered as he sat down, catching a glimpse of the book in your hand.

“I’m pretending to read, but I’d like to say that I am,”

Jungwon laughed in amusement, shaking his head. “Well, I’ll pretend to be impressed,” his dimpled smile never leaving, which persisted in tormenting you, because how could anyone look like that.

He’s got a smile that could light up this whole town. Hell, he was the sun that shone over your measly sad town. The light of your life and the happy pill of everyone else’s life. 

It was just a shame that you hadn’t seen it in a while ever since his girlfriend has brought him down. Even though he has reassured you that he was fine many times before whenever you asked, you could tell he wasn’t fully truthful, you know him better than that. 

Speaking of his girlfriend, Wonyoung soon pulled up by his house, and he had to eventually say goodbye to you too. Staring at the sight of them being close simply had your stomach turning and twisting, especially when she herself probably knew that you were secretly pining after him. Were you that transparent? Who cares?

As they drove off, you felt your grip on your book loosen, your heart equally dropping. 

Hey, whatcha doing with a girl like that?

It was one of the most important times in the school calendar. 

No, not exams. The national basketball competition. 

You weren’t a big sports fan, but somehow, this tournament would always rope you in every year, mainly because of the influence around you too. Exhibit A, Jungwon. But other than him, your friends were constant supporters of the school’s basketball team, not to mention, the atmosphere every year would go insane.

The game against the rival school was something you couldn’t and wouldn’t miss. Well, you didn’t have a choice either way. Being in the band team meant you were spending most of your time on the bleachers. Sigh.

On game day, you were there at the basketball court earlier than the scheduled time for final preparations, helping your bandmates around and idling boredly. You didn’t realise someone sneaking up on you until you heard your name being called, startling you and almost had you dropping an instrument. 

“Jungwon?”

“Hey,” he was in his practice gear, basketball trainers in his hand. “Didn’t mean to scare you. How’s the performance for tonight?”

“I’m hoping it’ll go well,” you said honestly, feeling uneasy under his intense stare. “I’m hoping your game goes good too,”

“Thank you,” he smiled, and there it was, his dimples. One look and it had you lightheaded. You couldn’t believe he had this effect on you still. “Will you finally treat me to some of your signature cupcakes again if we win?”

“I’ll consider it,”

“Great,” he beamed, a pleased and confident smirk replacing that sweet smile. “I’ll make sure to win it for you then,”

How could he say that and casually bid you goodbye after? Has he got no regard for your sanity whatsoever? 

His words continuously occupied your head even when your performance ended and the game started, your focus only trained on his running figure. The score was narrow, time was ticking and Jungwon had one target in mind, dashing towards the hoop and shooting the ball into it. That was the winning point and there was no doubt that the home team had won. You and your bandmates got up cheering, yelling and giving each other’s high fives. You were proud.

The cheerleaders by the court were cheering as well and doing their routine. The sight of Wonyoung caught your attention, her gaze was not on her boyfriend, but on another player. What? 

Once the game had ended, the team stayed on court celebrating. You were still on the bleachers, so all you could do was observe the scene unfolding below. Jungwon approached Wonyoung, but what you failed to notice was her standing with the player you saw her eyeing earlier. A fight broke out, a sour expression on Jungwon’s face, betrayal evident. It didn’t take long before he stormed away.

Oh no.

Upon returning home, tired and drained, you saw Jungwon in his room by the window, head hung low staring at his phone. At first, you didn’t know whether to get his attention and ‘talk’ or rather stay silent, but how could you when he seemed like a sad sappy kitten. So, you sent him a text, prompting him to stare up.

‘Hope you’re ok’ you wrote on your notepad.

He gave you a small smile, scribbling something down and holding his notepad up after,

‘I think I am? Whatever :/’

‘I’m here if you need to talk.’

‘Thanks :) you’re the best.’

‘I know’

He laughed at your response, but you continued on.

‘Congrats on your win! Super proud.’

‘Thank you! Does that mean I get my cupcakes now?’

You rolled your eyes, feigning an angry look. 

‘Fine >:(’

‘Sweeet. Talk tomorrow? We both need a rest.’

You nodded, and with a last wave from him, he closed his curtains and you did the same. It was obvious he didn’t want to talk about the clear fight from earlier and you didn’t want to push him either, but the sadness in his eyes told you he wasn’t getting over that easily.

Can’t he see that you were the one who understands him?

Prom, the day you dreaded. 

You were adamant on not attending initially, but the convincing from Yoon and your other friends had you eventually caving in. Poor you.

It wasn't like there was no one out there who asked you, you were actually just a great friend who agreed to go with them instead. Besides, men scared you, mostly the ones you didn't know. Not Jungwon, he's an exception, or maybe you were biased.

Once you were done getting ready in your bedroom, you opened your window curtains out of reflex and with purpose, gazing out. There was Jungwon, in his sleek black suit and tie, looking like a graceful prince. Abort, abort, abort—

Too late.

Upon seeing him noticing your figure by your window, it was too late to flee or hide. So, you waved at him, taking your notepad along.

'You look great!'

He smiled once he saw your writing, seemingly relieved and less tensed up.

'Thanks! You're beautiful in that dress. I love it on you.'

You're praying he didn't notice the slight tinge of scarlet on your cheeks from a distance away. Well, unless he has great vision. 

Shaking your feelings and thoughts away, you wrote your last message since it was time to leave soon. 

'I need to leave soon :( see you tonight?'

He nodded, writing swiftly before showing it.

'Yes! Will see you soon. Have fun :)'

Having fun isn't exactly the expression you would precisely describe how you felt at that hour. 

Alright, you found it dumb to get slightly jealous over the fact that Jungwon was with his girlfriend tonight, but you couldn't help mulling over it. You just wanted him, but why couldn't he see that?

Or maybe … you didn't know that he does.

Jungwon, on the other hand, was in the men's restroom, washing his face over and over again. He needed to think.

Breaking up with Wonyoung after the whole fiasco at the basketball game had affected him. Although a month and a half seemed like a  short time, it was still a relationship anyway, wasn't it? That's besides the point here.

Jungwon realised he liked you. 

He found it douchey especially when he had just gotten out of a relationship, he didn't want you to think that you're some rebound, but he ended up realising his true feelings. Gosh, couldn't the timing be any better?

His childhood friend, number one supporter since the start, you were the one he was in love with, and it was ridiculous he had to go through a long while just to find out his actual thoughts and feelings. It seemed unfair to you.

Rather impulsively, he hit the 'send' button on his message app, asking for you to meet him outside the hotel. 

Waiting for him to arrive was nerve-wracking for you. Having not seen him almost the entire night and now he had sent an ominous message to top it all off, it simply didn't come off as nonchalant as he intended it to be.

"Hi," you greeted as he made his way towards you. 

"Hey," his eyes scanned your figure, taking in the sight of you in the prettiest dress, one that complimented you to the brim.

"You … wanted to see me?"

"Oh," a gear clicked in Jungwon's mind. Seeing you had completely malfunctioned him and he almost forgot the task at hand. "Right. This is going to sound in–insane but, here me out,"

"Okay?" 

"I like you," 

He likes … you?

Were you tripping or was that genuinely what he'd said? 

"I'm so stupid for not realising sooner. You were always there for me, since we were kids till now. At my basketball practices and competitions, I can spot you in the crowd easily, you're the shining star. Whenever you're playing by the bleachers, I wish I could just run to you. I like you, Y/N, I do,"

Every word was filled with pent up frustration and love, unaware how much he has been pushing back until now. But what concerned him most was your quietness.

"Y/N?"

You blinked, instead it was your turn to malfunction. "I like you too," those words came out pouring naturally, as if you were built for it, fully ready and prepared. "Wait!"

Your exclamation had him jumping up in shock, startling him and catching him off guard.

"I broke it off with her. A–and before you think I'm trying to replace you with her or anything, I'm not. Just wanted to make it clear," he said quickly, almost slurring, clearly panicked. “We can take it slow, don’t need to rush into anything, all it matters is you knowing,”

“I’d like that,” you fiddled with your fingers, nervousness eating you up from within. “I–uh–can I kiss you?”

Where did that come from?

Jungwon flushed a shade of red, coughing from shock. Your eyes widened in horror at his reaction, waving your arms frantically. “It’s okay if you don’t want to! I’m sorry, I don’t know what got over me—”

“I–I do want to kiss you,” he rushed his words out, sounding in a hurry. He was just as whipped as you. 

You smiled, and that was all it took before you grabbed his tie, pulling him in to lock your lips with his.

It was magical. The feeling was something you’ve anticipated since forever, living up to those scenes you’ve seen in your favourite rom coms and having you giddy. His kiss was gentle but desperate, palms resting against the back of your neck and cheek, pulling you in for a deeper kiss. 

You drove him insane. The cherry chapstick he could taste on his tongue, the touch of your lips against his, never in a million years had he imagined himself in this exact scenario, usually he expected himself to fumble, but he was glad he didn’t. He wished the night would never end, and so did you.

Reluctantly so, you eventually pulled away from him, both of you having your breaths taken away and breathing deeply. Even though it was silent, no words even exchanged for a while, you found yourself basking in his presence and taking in the moment. Then, you broke out into a giddy smile, giggling out of nowhere.

Jungwon couldn’t help but be infected by you, smiling along and laughing. There it was, his smile, his dimples, the crinkles by his eyes. Everything about him was surreal to you, whatever happened tonight seemed surreal as a whole. 

“Can I take you home?”

“Of course you can.”

That night, you made sure to have him waiting outside your front yard as you ran in looking like cinderella dashing out of the ball, dashing towards the kitchen to fetch what you had promised. Cupcakes.

“I’ve made them,” you presented the cupcakes in all their glory, each decorated prettily and cutely. 

“You remembered!” he stared at them in awe, then looked back at you with the same expression. “Thank you, really,”

“It’s no biggie,” 

You passed him a reassuring smile, one that he responded back with a small grin. He glanced at his wrist watch for a second, then pointed his thumb over his shoulder. “It’s late, I’m sure you’re tired, and I still have to drive the car into the garage,”

“Right,” you laughed at his car parked half-assed by the sidewalk, luckily no passing car was present. “Goodnight, Won,”

“Goodnight, Y/N. I had a lot of fun tonight with you. I’m glad you were there,”

“Me too.”

Back in your room, you were done washing up and getting ready for bed, looking out your window as it has become a habit by now. Surprisingly,  Jungwon’s light was still switched on, and you had thought he was sound asleep by now, but guess he wasn’t. 

Speaking of him, he came crashing into your sight not even a minute later, notepad in hand and a cheeky smile that told you he had a plan up his sleeve. He stood right in front of the window, directly across your room, then held up the notepad in hand.

‘Be mine?’

This guy …

You grabbed your notepad, writing down the obvious answer, a lovesick smile that he never failed to put on your face. 

‘Yes!! Duh!!’

He let out a laugh at your response, but said nothing more, acting out a sleeping gesture to signal you to sleep soon and that he himself was also off to bed. You only nodded, but before bidding one another goodbye, he blew you a kiss.

You rolled your eyes at his playfulness, blowing one back and waving him goodnight, both of you unwilling to close the curtains and go to bed.

Either way, you were going to bed that night with peace and love in your mind, because finally, he belonged to you.

( © jaylver all rights reserved. do NOT copy, plagiarise or edit my work and repost whatsoever. once discovered will be exposed and blacklisted. )

☆ permanent taglist (open):

@silentkarnival @strvlveera @freshsaladbowl @bejewelledgirl @fakeuwus @yenqa @hsgwrld @ilovegyuvin @enhacatalog

[rwshfordgirl]

CHRISTMAS DINNER

all images were taken from pinterest.

where reader and jude bellingham are used to spending christmas together, but this year's christmas could change their relationship forever.

a/n: hope you like it;)

requests are open | check here my masterlist.

"my God, you started getting ready for dinner at two in the afternoon, it's almost seven at night and you haven't finished?" my brother appeared at the bathroom door, standing in the doorway with his arms crossed and completely incredulous. "i'm almost done." i replied. "you're already very pretty little sister, you don't need all this." he said making me smile "but i'm sure jude bellingham will notice all this effort." in response, he received a middle finger and the door closing in his face.

james knows me like no one else, unfortunately. not that i'm trying to get jude's attention with excessive makeup and flashy clothes, on the contrary, i want to be as natural as possible. and now, i have to say that thinking like this, i look like a 15 year old teenager trying to win over the boy she has a crush on school.

and my brother is exaggerated, i started getting ready almost now.

from my room i could hear the voices downstairs in the house, i could hear the voices of all the bellinghams but not jude, he didn't arrive.

my family and his family are friends, our mothers grew up together, he and i grew up together. and it's a christmas tradition to have dinner together, there wasn't a year when we weren't together. 

i think i was ten when i realized i had a crush on jude. he seemed like my superhero defending me from the bullying i used to suffer.  and he always showed concern for me, always sending me messages wanting to know if everything is okay with college, wanting to know if i'm in good health.

i can say that i love everything about jude, especially his worried way, but i also love his polite way of being. the smile he gives when he sees me, the photos he sends me after games, the way he touches my hair.

i don't know if jude is interested in me in the same way that i am interested in him, sometimes i believe that it is just his way of showing affection, even if it makes me fall more and more in love with him.

i was putting away what i had used when two knocks on the door made me jump back. i was distant, caught up in my thoughts."hey, are you ready yet?" it was jude. i was caught off guard again. "oh, hi jude! i'm done now." i said as i opened the bedroom door to see him. i looked bellingham up and down, he was as handsome as ever. "i loved your dress, it looks good on you" jude ran his hand over the back of his neck "thank you! you also chose your clothes well today." he chuckled.

"i bet my mom asked you to come get me." i said, turning off the light in the room and then leaving. bellingham moved a little more to the side. "you got it right." i nodded. "i thought you hadn't arrived, i heard everyone's voice but yours." he smiled. "i'm less talkative today." he commented as he directed his gaze to the floor. "lucky we have time to tell each other our problems today."

i signaled for bellingham to follow me downstairs and he promptly came. "green is definitely your color." his mother said as she hugged me. "you look stunning, jude will be even more in love." my cheeks flushed as i heard my mother's laughter and saw jude rolling his eyes. i was so embarrassed that my thank you came out almost silent. i greeted jobe and his father, then i sat between the youngest bellingham and jude.

jobe and i spent exactly fifteen minutes watching videos on tiktok, jude even laughed at some things but he's acting completely weird today. "what's going on in your head?" i turned my face towards the player who smiled shyly, without showing his teeth "a lot of stuff." i laid my head on his shoulder "do you want to talk about it?" he nodded and i got up from the couch, extending my hand to help him up.

i wanted to take him out to the backyard so we could have privacy, even though no one in the room would be able to hear our conversation due to the noise of the voices. jude sat across from me on the wooden table seat. we stared at each other for a few minutes, i raised my eyebrows when i noticed his eyes analyzing every detail of my face and bellingham laughed. 

"first laugh of the night, we're already moving forward." he chuckled before clasping his hands together and resting them on the table in front of him. "my mom is right, green is definitely your color." bellinghams love to make my cheeks blush "thank you mr jude! you don't look bad in black and white either." i complimented him "and you know you don't look bad wearing any color, that impresses me." i rolled my eyes. he has no idea that his playful flirting makes my heart race.

"i think this is a great time for you to tell me what's bothering you so much." he bit his lower lip "never mind, i don't know how to explain it." he said "oh please, draw a picture with twigs in the snow then." he smiled "does it have anything to do with madrid?" He denied "let's forget about it, i already feel much better." he smiled "ugh, it's okay! if you want to talk about it, i'll be willing to listen."

"let's go back inside, i'm going to freeze." i said, pretending my jaw was shaking. my coat isn't doing me much good. jude got up, I thought he was going to wait for me so we could go back inside my house together, but he sat down next to me. "let's stay here, i'll warm you up if anything! but i just want to stay here with you." i pouted "are you needy or do you miss me?" i turned my face towards him. "both of them." he rested his face on his hand. again i was rolling my eyes, again i was getting nervous.

"didn't you find anyone in madrid?" i questioned as i stood in the same position as the player. "my heart is set on birmingham." i laughed. "i bet it's that girl who used to go to school with us, but i must say she's engaged to a friend of yours." i said as i played with jude's hand "i don't even remember her anymore. unfortunately, only girls in green occupy my mind for a long time." 10 seconds to process what he had said. i laughed awkwardly and licked my lips. "you went from downcast to flirty really fast."

jude turned my face to him again. i looked at him confused. "i'm starting to think you're drunk." he threw his head back laughing. "but seriously..." he ran his hand over the back of his neck before continuing. "seriously what?" i asked. "do you think you and i wouldn't work as a couple?" i was speechless. jude bellingham is out of his mind. 

"are you kidding me?" i laughed nervously "what? you don't think so? if you knew how much i think about you every day you wouldn't say that." jude was serious. i was sure of it after analyzing his body posture. i can't believe what i'm hearing. "of course you think, we are bests." i said and then turned my head to the other side.  

jude put his hands on his face and then shook his head "you know i don't think of you as just a friend." my heart could jump out of my chest at any moment "i know?" i scoffed. jude turned my head towards him once more, his hand promptly brushing a strand of hair that was falling over my face behind my ear.

i could hear his breathing getting louder as he got closer. his mouth was just inches from mine. i want them to stick together.

"was that what was eating at your mind?" i questioned. bellingham's eyes flickered between my mouth and my eyes "maybe." he replied.

"my mom is looking for you, she wants everyone in the room now." james appeared in the backyard, making bellingham and I jump back. "okay, we'll go." i stood up first and saw james looking at me with an arched eyebrow, but he laughed and continued toward the house. "think about what i told you, please." jude held my hand, he was still sitting down. "if you knew everything that goes on in my head, you wouldn't say that." he stood up and again we were close enough to hear each other's heartbeats "and you hid this from me?" he questioned before giving me a kiss on the corner of my mouth. "we'll work, i promise." he continued.

[mrswinchestersfate]

These Wooden Walls (Josh Washington X Reader) Part II

summary: Josh invites you back to the cabin a few years after his breakdown, after pulling this horrible prank that made your friend group fall apart. He's doing better now and finally wants to make peace with the place where it all happened. You've been Beth's best friend since Middle School, spending summers and winters with the Washington family at their cabin year after year. You and Josh always had a weird relationship - somewhere between annoying brother of your best friend and exchanging secrets in the dark. But when things spiraled, you couldn’t save him. Maybe you can be there for him now.

ship: josh washington X f!reader

word count: 1542

info: josh survived and got some well-deserved therapy, 3 years after the prank, no wendigos AU, female reader

warnings: mental illness, flash-backs, depression, mild cursing

_____

14 years old

It had been raining the whole day. Waking up to raindrops falling against the window had been nice. Being surrounded by nothing but mountains and trees and rivers and lakes made it sound even louder. Usually, I was the first one up right after Melinda, but that morning, as I went down the stairs, I heard her talking to someone. The radio was softly playing Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For by U2. They were laughing about something.

As I stepped into the kitchen, Melinda gave me a big smile. “Hey, my little morning bird. Look who decided to join us today,” she said, gesturing in Josh’s direction. He just chuckled. “The rain is so loud, I couldn’t sleep. I don’t know how Chris does it,” he said. “Christopher would probably sleep through anything. Remember that one time we drove you home from the waterpark and Dad had to emergency brake? Slept right through it—and all of us screaming,” Melinda said, and we laughed.

Moments like these made me feel like I was so lucky in life that I was scared it couldn’t possibly stay like that. I started almost compulsively praying each night for it to never change. That, by some miracle, it could be summer in the Washingtons' lodge forever.

“Are you making pancakes?” I asked, glancing at the stove already set up with a pan and some delicious-smelling batter. “Of course. On a good rainy summer day, you’ve got to make the best of it—pancakes, tea, and a good movie,” she said, then added, “Could you guys get the plates and the other stuff?”

“Sure, Mom,” Josh said, getting up with a smirk and making a grand arm gesture to let me reach the kitchen cabinets first. I took a step—then stopped, making him crash right into me. Melinda shook her head, but we could see her grin while Josh pretended to whine about his shoulder being hurt.

We set the counter with plates and forks and syrup. The song changed to Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls as we sat down to eat, Melinda still flipping pancakes in the pan.

“You know, that was real music,” she said, nodding toward the radio. “I saw them live with your dad years ago. No phones, no distractions. And it was raining, just like today. We were all wet to the bone—even the band—but gosh, it was a moment,” she said dreamily.

Josh and I just looked at each other. He rolled his eyes playfully, but I knew that smile. He loved these stories. We both did. We called them movie moments. It was about the little scenes in life that felt like something out of an indie film—moments where you were fully alive. We often talked about how we wanted to make sure to experience a lot of them ourselves.

“We still have concerts, you know,” he said to her. “It’s different. But then again, what do I know—I’m old,” she chuckled. “You’re not that old,” Beth said, entering the kitchen with a yawn—just awake enough to tease her mom.

We spent the day watching movies and playing board games, but the rain stayed. In the evening, it picked up again, but the sun broke through just in time for sunset. Chris and Hannah were upstairs getting ready for bed. Sam, Beth, and I were reading on the couch while Josh was whining about being bored. In the background, music played quietly—carefully handpicked by Beth and Hannah.

He poked my leg with his foot, but I’d learned by now that ignoring him was best in moments like this. He sighed, got up, and grabbed the phone connected to the speaker. He clicked through a few songs—some rap interrupted the calm atmosphere, then a random Katy Perry track. “Come on, dude,” Sam said, annoyed. Beth threw a pillow at her brother. “Hey!” he complained, but then a smile crept across his face.

For a moment, it was quiet as he searched for something. Then the opening notes of Iris started, and I looked up to see him grinning at me. “What are you doing?” I asked, but he was already mouthing the lyrics dramatically. “What the fuck, Josh?” Beth asked.

He walked to the patio door, opened it, and stepped outside—right into the rain, until he was soaked through.

“Are you serious?” I asked, but the book was already slipping from my hands as I followed him to the door.

By now, he was screaming the chorus. I couldn’t stop laughing at his drenched performance—completely off-key, dramatically moving around. He waved me over, but I shook my head. “No way.” “When everything feels like the movies—yeah, you bleed just to know you’re alive,” he sang, then added: “Movie moment, (y/n). You have to join!”

I bit my lip, torn between common sense and doing something stupid, but Josh had already grabbed my hand the second I hesitated and pulled me out with him into the rain.

It was warm rain, heavy enough to feel like a gentle shower. He never stopped singing, nudging me until I gave in and started screaming the lyrics with him. Melinda came to the door, shaking her head and laughing while Josh played imaginary drums.

The next few days, we both came down with a cold. I got it first, and Josh felt so bad that he stayed inside with me while the others went to the lake or played football. We started watching Doctor Who. He caught it a day later, and for days we just lay on the couch, coughing and blowing our noses into tissues, eating Melinda’s famous sick-people soup, and watching season after season.

We got so invested that when we finally felt better a week later, we snuck down to the living room at night to keep watching in peace. He cried when Ten regenerated, and I cried too and we made a pinky promise to never tell anyone.

Present

"You probably want to unpack," Josh said, his eyes flicking to the big backpack I'd brought with me.

"Yes, that's a good idea," I answered, but neither of us moved.

I'd always stayed in Beth's room. Last year was the first time I didn't. Instead, I stayed in one of the guest rooms—but that wasn't a great memory either.

"I, uh..." he started, scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably. "This is fucked up. I'm sorry," he added, and for a moment, I couldn't help but laugh, because he was right. This was really fucked up.

He looked up with a grimace, but there was a small smile in it. I could see it.

"It's alright," I said, and he let out a breath.

"Well, you can choose whichever room you want, of course. But I thought maybe you could just take mine. It's kinda neutral, I guess. And I'm sleeping in the guest room anyway. Feels... more right," he said.

I nodded. "Okay."

It felt nice to just be this open. To say what we thought instead of tiptoeing around everything—like the first few times I visited him in the clinic. When I didn't know what to say and he didn't know how to ask.

I followed him up the stairs and into his room. It looked like I remembered it—blue-checked sheets on his double bed in the center, posters of slasher movies on the walls, actually framed because they were probably expensive vintage ones his parents had found for him. Polaroids were pinned to a board next to his dresser. All of them taken here, except one.

I took a step closer. Josh had carried my bag up and now set it down by the door, his gaze following me.

"Wow, we were babies then. I didn't know you had that here," I laughed, taking a closer look.

It was a picture of Josh and me. The day of Beth, Hannah, Sam, and my prom. We'd all planned to meet at the Washington house and drive there together. I was sitting next to Josh on the couch, dressed up. He wore a dress shirt and trousers. We were drinking Coke out of glass bottles with straws and laughing at something. I loved that photo. I didn't know he even had a copy.

"Oh," he said. "Yeah. I think it's a good picture. We look pretty good in it."

I chuckled. "We do. Good thing Melinda made you dress up just to take pictures with your sisters," I said. "Sorry you had to drive us. Especially the way home. Must've been really annoying."

But he just shook his head. "No. I was actually really glad I was there."

We were quiet for a moment, caught in memories.

Eventually, he took a step back. "So... the sheets are freshly changed, and I aired it out earlier. But if you need anything, just tell me. I—I'll let you unpack," he said, hesitating before heading toward the door.

"Thanks, Josh. You did a lot here already," I said with a smile.

He shrugged with a small smile of his own, walking out, but not before glancing back over the room one last time, as if checking if everything still looked right. His hand lingered on the doorknob for a second as if to close it, then he let it go like it burned him.

"Sorry," he said quietly, giving me an apologetic look. And with one last deep breath, he left the room.

I guess some things still weren't healed. For either of us.

[irrevocablecondition]

What have some of your favourite reads been this year? I am dying to find more books to fall in love with, my selection of books this year has been disappointing vfjnbjgnb

okayyy hello !!! here's some of the ones i've rated 4 stars or above this year (also some i've rated lower but think they're necessary nonetheless)

Icarus - K. Ancrum

incredible story of personal art heists, fraught family relations, and a forbidden romance. bonus points for the intersex representation and a special mention to the quotes "you think i would know art and not know this?" "there have been men before you before we had words for it". just,,, such a lovely relationship. such a good read.

The Push - Ashley Audrain

a harrowing story of motherhood that isn't quite what our protagonist expected it to be. a descent into madness, incredibly tense relationships. this one has stuck with me So Much. it was so raw, so real, and i have never felt so connected to a protagonist that is so disconnected from herself. incredible mhm.

Nineteen Minutes - Jodi Picoult

everything i have read from picoult so far has been incredible but thissss one?? had me in tears. picoult has such a unique voice that neverrr fails to pick apart even the most important questions from so many perspectives. this one is about a school shooting, how so much can change in nineteen minutes but that time will change everyone's life forever. we follow a bunch of different characters as we try to understand why this happened and what led the kid to do it. we watch relationships end and begin, we watch lives irrevocably change and people remain stagnant and just,,, UGH. i also recommend "The Storyteller" by picoult if you like this! though that one was a lot more intense imo.

Don't Let the Forest In - C.G Drews

if you haven't heard of or read this one then you neeedddd to!!! i can't even summarise this or describe it in a way that will do it justice but this book consumedddd me. fell in love with the world and the characters and felt like i was going mad with them.

Beartooth - Callan Wink

two brothers in yellowstone embarking on a dangerous mission to settle debts. a Real and Raw sibling relationship. this book was so visceral i could Feel it. i could Smell it. i was in there with them. the most important thing in this book is growing after grief and finding yourself amongst that, the plot is slow based and the prose is easily digestable - it's the Characters that draw you in and keep you on that little makeshift raft rushing down the rapids with them.

Grey Dog - Elliot Gish

a lesser known classic that i'll recommend until the end of time. it's the early 1900s and we're following a teacher as she goes to a new school in the middle of nowhere with a handful of students. it's gay, it's a descent into madness (again, i have a theme going here), it's journal entries and nights of misrememberings. it's a tragic and messy woman just being Tragic and Messy and her journal giving her the space to do that in the most authentic way. a steady but rapid decline into insanity and a grey dog that may or may not be real. loved it.

The Last Whaler - Cynthia Reeves

ohhh just lovely. i finished this the other day and !!! so we're in the arctic, we're hunting whales but we're also finding letters from our deceased wife from decades ago and we're watching these two trips happen parallel to one another. once again - descent into madness. grief. the loss of a child, the loss of a mother. but also,,, a warm hug all at once? i just fell in love with this couples relationship, this location, this proseeee. 5 stars for whale book 🙂↕️

okertttt !! that's a good handful me thinks !!! lemme know if you read any and like them :33 i have endless recs to provide <333

[thenovapaige]

thoughts on grieving liam payne 7 months later

i've had enough of people giving me weird looks for being genuinely devastated over the loss of liam payne so i wanted to come and express my feelings somewhere where there may be a few people who understand.

i want to preface this by saying that i am aware that my pain doesn't compare to the pain his family and closest friends have felt over the last 7 months. parents lost their child, a child lost his father, siblings lost their brother, people lost a friend, etc. i just wanted to acknowledge that because i've seen some people getting angry over fans "making it about themselves". i also want to acknowledge that liam made mistakes and i am not informed on all of the nuances of the situations and i will not be mentioning that here. this is just for conversations on grief.

i don't think you can understand the feeling of losing a favourite celebrity unless you've experienced it. in all honesty, i hadn't even kept up with liam all that much in recent years, and his death still brought me to my knees. this was a feeling i'd never experienced before. i'd experienced grief before--heartbreaking, world-stopping grief--and yet, this was something new. normally, with grief, there is a sudden change in your daily life, a sudden absence where there was once such vibrance. this scenario was different. my daily life didn't change all that much. and yet, my inner world changed forever.

i grew up with one direction. i became a fan when i first heard what makes you beautiful and saw their music video on tv. i bought random unauthorized bibliographies at school book fairs and covered my walls in posters from teen magazines. i went to walmart every november to get their new album on cd with my mom, and i begged her for the one direction barbies when they came out. i was just 9 when i became a fan, meaning they've been a part of my life for 13 years now. they brought me so much joy through their music, videos, and interviews. they gave me something to talk to my peers about at school. and when middle school took a turn for the worse as i started being bullied, their music was always there; "one direction funny moments" was always just a click away on youtube. when i finally saw them in concert after a year of being bullied, my spark was reignited. i was excited to be alive again.

then... the hiatus. i was 13 when it was announced. and i cried. and cried. and cried. but, i believed them when they said they'd come back, so i waited. as the years went on and their solo careers took off, i slowly came to terms with the idea of them not coming back anytime soon. i listened to their solo albums, saw them live on their solo tours, and continued to use their solo music to help me through the turbulent years of being a teenager. although i had realized by this point that their goal was not to come back as a band in the near future, there was always a piece of me that held onto the hope of having a reunion. even if it was in 2030, 2040, or 2050. i just needed to hold onto the hope that my favourite band--the five people who guided me through the most beautiful, complex, confusing years of my life--would be there again one day, even if just for one performance. the child within me needed to hold onto this hope.

as the years went on, i stayed closer to some of them than others, listened to some of their solo music more than others. but, one direction was always there, underlying the person i'd become. not only did they give me hope as a child when i had none--they helped me become comfortable with myself. they were the ones who helped me become comfortable enough to explore my queerness and learn who i am outside of the strict societal constructs i had been raised within. long story short, one direction was pivotal to me growing into who i am today. when i went through multiple instances of grief in my personal life, their music was always there to take me back to a simpler time. the memories attached to the music, to the old magazines in my closet, to the many blankets and pillows stuffed away somewhere deep in my parents' closet, were always there to comfort me. to heal my inner child. to remind me of the things that make life worth living. although the hiatus made me sad (and there was indeed a lot of sadness upon the realization that this was more than just a "break"), their music, for me, almost always had happy associations.

then, the fateful day of october 16, 2024 came around. it was a normal day for me until i got home in the evening, checked my texts, and froze. to be honest, i struggle to remember my first reaction to reading that life altering message from an old friend. i don't think i processed it until a few hours later when the tears wouldn't stop flowing. and they didn't stop flowing for weeks. it's difficult to explain the feeling--any person losing their life like that is a tragedy, but then the realization hit: a person pivotal to helping me turn into who i am today, a person pivotal to my childhood memories, a person whose songwriting helped this 12-year-old girl want to stay alive when everything else felt like it was going wrong--this person was just... gone. no more.

suddenly, the 22-year-old me had to hold her understanding of the situation alongside the explosive devastation of the child within me who just learned that a member of her favourite band had died. i spent weeks and weeks crying, unable to even understand what i was feeling. i guess i never realized just how much these five boys meant to me. i didn’t realize how much i held onto them for joy, even in 2024, until one of them was gone. and that devastates me. every time i’d listened to one direction before then, every time i’d danced through the nostalgic tones of their voices as they serenaded me in my bedroom, every time i’d get excited over a glimpse of a reunion–it was all joy. there was already grief for the band itself that had made its way through my heart many times before, but still, there was so much joy when i got to just listen to their music, watch their videos, and go back to a simpler time. having seen the cruel jokes online in the comments of posts grieving for this beloved person and having read the many posts from people ridiculing those grieving, i realized this was not going to be an easy thing to process.

for the first few months i felt like a piece of me had died with liam. i couldn’t stop crying, i couldn’t stop feeling like everything i ever loved was just gone in the blink of an eye. most of my friends didn’t get it, and none of them checked up on me. my grief had to be hidden as i went to my classes at university and heard the ways some classmates made jokes about his death. i felt so alone. empty. it felt like my inner child had died.

but, when i worked up the nerve to tell my therapist about this event that had completely shaken up my inner world, i was met with... disdain? confusion? she didn't say anything rude, per se, but just her facial expression and lack of understanding of why this is so hard for me was enough for me to feel that i was truly alone in this. i am so beyond tired of being invalidated for grieving someone i didn't know personally. i am so tired of having to pretend i'm not still crying about this situation 7 months later. i am so tired of feeling alone.

and now, i am lost. i can no longer use their music to heal my inner child, to go back to a better time. what was once a haven of safety and comfort is now a wasteland of grief. losing liam felt like losing an old friend i didn't see much anymore. it felt like losing sight of the only distant light in a deep, dark cave. it felt like my inner child was extinguished. this band that always made me beyond happy was suddenly shrouded with sadness, and it always will be. that's a hard thing to process. it's hard to process that someone who helped me so much was destroyed by the very fame that led me to knowing who he was in the first place. the person who helped me feel community and love was gone in the blink of an eye. it's like my inner child is the one who heard the news. there are no words to explain how this feels. it's like i was taken back to my 13-year-old soul. i couldn't fathom a world without liam. without any of one direction. i couldn't process this through an adult lens. it was just pure pain. pure sadness.

and i think that's okay--i think it's okay to grieve. i think it's beautiful that one person could impact this many people. in a world that seems to be becoming increasingly cold and distant, where genuine expressions of emotion are becoming rarer and rarer, i find it inspiring that so many of us have been so deeply touched by this one person. i hope liam knows the impact he's had on the world. as someone whose entire life would be different without his influence, i want to let myself grieve. i have and will continue to let myself grieve. i know he was a celebrity that i didn't know personally, and i know he made mistakes, but the impact he had on my life and the lives of millions of others cannot be overstated. when something so pivotal to so many of our formative years is suddenly gone without warning, it's hard to process. and people who invalidate those very real feelings lack empathy.

if anyone's reading this and understands the feeling, i am so very sorry. i hope you know you're not alone. and if you're somehow reading this as someone who doesn't get it, please just be kind to those going through this. it's not easy, especially in a world where grief is stigmatized at the best of times.

liam, we love and miss you.

[kokinu09]

Let Go of the Reins || CHAPTER 14

~*~

pairing seungmin x fem!reader

genre strangers to lovers, romance, fluff, slight angst later, happy ending, social media, not meant to be, someday

summary Australia is considered home for two of the eight members. When two tour dates are scheduled for the land down under, the boys can’t help but want to spend a bit more time there to visit family and do a little sightseeing. So how do they convince the company that they need to stay a couple weeks? Filming some SKZ Code episodes.

A local riding school just outside the city with amazing reviews for their skilled instructors and beautiful horses is hosting a very popular kpop group to film their experiences. Y/N knows the group well and she just so happens to be their star working student.

status ongoing

taglist OPEN

previous | masterlist | next

~*~

It’s so easy to fall into the flow; a lighthearted k-drama playing on the tv that neither of you are fully paying attention to, arms wrapped around you with one of your biggest fluffy blankets thrown over both your laps, and a bowl of popcorn resting in the middle while an assortment of candies litter your coffee table. He makes a cheesy joke, you toss a kernel of popcorn at his face. Both of you laugh hysterically at how unserious you guys have made this.

When you settle back into watching the show, you enjoy the feeling of his warmth at your side. A smile plays on your lips as you rest your head on his shoulder. “This is really nice,” you comment, getting a hum of agreement as he turns his head to kiss your scalp.

“I wouldn’t be mad if I could stay like this forever,” he adds.

That sends your thoughts running away with imagined ideas of having him all to yourself; having weekly movie nights like this, sitting on a porch swing watching the horses graze on a hot February afternoon with your head on his shoulder, or even listening to him hum and sing while you cook dinner together. It’s all so domestic and dreamy, that you know it would be too good to be true. But you allow yourself this moment of delusion.

“So what did my hyungs say on your ride? I’m sure they were either spreading gossip or looking for it,” he chuckles.

“I wouldn’t say it was gossip really,” you try to defend but he tips his face forward to look at you with a raised brow and you crack. “Ok maybe just a little bit,” you laugh.

“Felix talked about Jeongin’s shopping habits and how he thinks he has a problem, but I suspect neither of them probably have any room to talk. Then, Hyunjin complained that Chan wasn’t using this vacation time like he should be, which reminds me, you should really try to pry him away from that computer every now and then.”

“Trust me, we try but it’s easier said than done,” he says with a shake of his head.

“Hyunjin was also complaining about Minho being in a sour mood because the hotel breakfast was out of puddings, then Felix told me that Jisung had ordered some to be delivered so it wouldn’t ruin his whole day.”

“Oh yeah, I heard about that. And it was only enough for the two of them so Channie-hyung whined that he wanted some too,” Seungmin said, adding to your lore of their morning meal debacle. “They all make me sick.”

“You wouldn’t trade them for the world,” you tease with an eye roll.

“The world? No. For you? In a heartbeat.”

Your breath hitches but she try not to let it show, blush darkening your cheeks as you shy away from looking at him. “Don��t say that. I’d be devastated if I was the cause of the group breaking up,” you scold him, a genuine frown tugging the corners of your lips.

“I’m just saying. But I don’t plan on having to pick,” he assures, giving you a squeeze. “What else did they say? Talk any smack about me?” He asks, purposefully changing the subject.

“They were curious about us,” you start, catching his attention. “Wondering if you’re treating me right.”

“Yeah? And how did you tell them I’m doing?” He asks with a knowing smile.

“I said you needed some work,” you joke, earning a howl from him as he throws his head back. And you can’t help the giggle that bubbles up in your chest. “No, but you’re lucky. It sounded like they would’ve taught you a lesson if I had said anything less than excellence.”

“They talk a big game but they couldn’t lay a finger on me,” he says between breathy laughs.

“Hyunjin did claim he taught you everything you know. Then Felix claimed it was all Chan,” you muse.

“Yeah right!” He scoffs. “If anything, Channie-hyung knows how to flirt but I don’t think any of them would know romance if it smacked them in the face.”

“Now who’s being dramatic!” You laugh, which he joins you. Wrapping both arms around you for a tight hug.

The credits were rolling, you’re not sure how long they have been going at this point but it was also late enough that a yawn escapes you. “Why don’t we get ready for bed if you’re tired,” he suggests and you agree.

The two of you untangle to quickly go through your nighttime routines while also occasionally intertwining them. Like how he playfully bumps your elbow as you’re brushing your teeth together. It’s so domestic and sickeningly sweet that you wonder if your delusional thoughts earlier are really that far out of reach.

You manage to check your phone when you plop onto the bed while he finishes his skincare. No wonder these men are so beautiful. They take an eternity taking care of their faces. Chuckling at your own internal joke, you pull up your missed texts from Liv.

You frown at that last message. ‘Too busy’? Aren’t the boys basically on vacation the rest of their time in Australia? But then again, 3RACHA isn’t exactly known for taking breaks.

Seungmin finally comes out of the bathroom with a fresh face and damp hair around the edges. A smile spreads across your face and you toss your phone on the nightstand. He walks over and drops his phone next to yours before plopping down beside you on the edge of the bed.

His hand finds purchase on your knee, giving it an assuring squeeze when he asks, “Are you sure you’re ok with me staying the night?”

It almost makes you giggle, as if you’d send him packing just when you’re about to get what you’ve looked forward to all day. “Very sure,” you say with certainty. Your grin widens as you scoot back to slip under the covers, patting the bed for him to come join.

He climbs over and slides in next to you, immediately pulling you back into his arms even before you found a comfy position. You burst into a fit of giggles but also don’t put up much of a fight, snuggling into his warmth when the two of you settle down.

“Ah, this is the life,” he blissfully sighs in a dramatic manner. Since you can’t really disagree with that, you opt for a hum in agreement.

The minutes tick by, the two of you tangled in each other’s arms, and you can’t find it in yourself to fall asleep. Though you think Seungmin has started to. His breathing by your ear is soft and steady, a sure sign that sleep is approaching. But there’s a curiosity swirling in your brain that won’t allow you to settle until you ask.

“Minnie? Are you asleep?” You whisper. He grunts in sleepy acknowledgment that he hears you.

“Not yet,” he says with a big yawn. “What is it baby?” He cuddles up closer (which you didn’t even think was possible) and buries his nose in your hair.

“I was just thinking about, the future…” your words trail off as that little fear in the back of your mind rears its ugly head.

“Oh yeah?” He sounds a little more awake and a lot more curious as he frees you for a moment to rub the sleep from his eyes. “About what, exactly, were you thinking about for the future?”

“Just,” you pause again, afraid to say your hopes and dreams out loud in case they might be too big for how new your relationship is. In case they don’t align with his. But you’ve gone too far to turn back now. “Just think about us. Our future.”

With the words finally leaving your lips, it’s like a weight is lifted off your chest. Your mind finally quieting down to hear what he thinks. He is quiet for a moment behind you, you can’t even hear him breathing.

“Are they good thoughts? …Or…?” He asks hesitantly.

“They’re hopeful thoughts.”

Suddenly, you feel his hand on your hip, tugging you to roll over and face him. You stubbornly refuse at his first attempt but quickly lose that battle. A little reluctantly, you roll over onto your other side, face to face with the one man that throws your brain into inner turmoil.

His eyes look at you with a fondness in them but there is also a cute little furrow to his brow, mild concern etched onto his features. “Tell me what’s on your mind, Baby,” he almost pleads with his tone.

“I feel a connection with you, and I want to believe that we can withstand the test of time,” you start. “But I also understand that long distance relationships are hard on couples.”

“And you’re worried that we won’t be able to handle it,” he nods along.

“No! …Well, yes…” You quickly deny but just as quickly realize that’s exactly what you’ve been worried about. His features soften from concern to utter fondness.

“Do you want to know what I think?” He asks, a bit of teasing seeping into his tone.

“That is the whole reason we are having this conversation,” you can’t completely keep the sarcasm out of your voice either. It makes him chuckle as he slides his knuckles along your jawline.

“I think you worry too much,” he says, even going as far as to tap the tip of your nose affectionately. You gape at him in exasperation but he goes on before you can rebuttal. “We have something special, Y/N. No matter how far we may be, it won’t change the way I feel about you.”

“The thing is, I don’t doubt our feelings for one another. I question how hard it’s going to be to be away from you. And…how we’ll manage it…” you admit carefully, unsure of how he might take your uncertainty.

“It will be excruciating not to be able to drive across town just to hold you in my arms like this,” he says, pulling you into an embrace again for added effect. “But knowing that you’ll be waiting for me, will be enough to get me by.” Then his face morphs slightly with another thought. “That is, as long as you’re…willing to wait for me.”

“Of course I will! And, lucky for you, I’m a very patient woman,” you joke proudly.

It has both of you laughing softly in the small space between you. It fills your heart with affection knowing that the two of you can find a way to laugh and joke no matter the situation. It’s one of the things you love most about him.

“Then we have nothing to worry about,” he whispers, pressing his forehead to yours. “It’s easy to overthink it but we’ll be fine.”

It’s not easy to just ignore but you want to believe in him, believe in your relationship. So you do. “Ok,” you simply agree.

He smiles, leaning in to connect your lips for the first time since you laid down. It’s sweet and soft. Like a promise to keep his word.

Your muscles relax into the mattress and your fingers find their way into his hair. It wouldn’t hurt to enjoy this a little bit longer, right?

The two of you are content to stay like this, tender kisses and gentle touches. That is until one of your giggles turns into a yawn. He chuckles and kisses your cheek.

“We should get some sleep,” he suggests.

“But I’m not tired yet,” you argue weakly, eyes betraying you as they flutter closed.

“Of course you’re not, Pretty Girl.” He gently coaxes you to roll back over onto your side again, easily slotting in behind you and pulling you into his chest.

Then you hear a blissful sigh as he gets comfortable; arms squeezing you, nose brushing your shoulder. If you weren’t so tired, you might have teased him about it. But on the other hand, this really is nice. You can’t remember the last time you’ve been able to fall asleep this easily.

He presses a kiss into the skin of your neck then whispers, “Sweet dreams, Y/N. I love you.”

“Love you, Seungminnie,” you mumble in return. You think he chuckles again but the fogs of sleep are starting to cloud your thoughts. It’s easier just to sink into it, let yourself drift off as you’re held safe and sound.

~*~

An incessant buzzing pulls you out of your slumber, a pleasant heat radiates against your back with an arm draped over your waist. You sigh happily and close your eyes to try getting just a few more minutes of peaceful rest, only for your phone to buzz on the nightstand four times in a row.

A quiet groan stays trapped between your tightly closed lips in an attempt not to wake the sleeping boy next to you. Reluctantly, you reach an arm out from under the covers to grab your phone.

Without thinking, you let out a deep (almost frustrated) sigh. The sound seems to stir Seungmin partially awake. His arm, still laying across your waist, tightens as he stretches and yawns. Your soft giggle in response has his eyes blinking up at you, a lazy, tired smile gracing his features. 

“Good morning Beautiful,” he greets you with a gruff voice you’ve never heard from him before.

“Good morning, did you sleep well?” You ask, reaching a hand up to comb through his messy hair. He leans into your touch, basking in your attention. 

“Best sleep of my life,” he tells you.

“You’re being dramatic again,” you accuse fondly, turning in his hold to face him fully and propping your chin up with your elbow. 

“I am being overly honest, actually,” he chuckles. 

“Unfortunately, it’s time to get up,” you reply, petting his head affectionately.

Then he drops his head into the crook of your neck, snuggling close and hiding his eyes from the light of morning leaking in through the cracks in the curtains. “It’s too early to be getting up,” he groans.

“You know, I agree with you. But to keep our jobs, we have to follow their rules.” This earns a louder groan and a stronger squeeze. You don’t fight against his hold, in fact you wrap your arm around him to hold him, too. 

“What if I said screw our jobs,” he asks rhetorically. 

“I would have lots of things to say,” you reply playfully. He leans back to look at you, his smile turned amused.

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“First off, I told you before that I would never let you make me the cause of Stray Kids breaking up,” he hums as he remembers and you go on. “And I would say screw my job, I don’t care, but then I’d have to find a new home for Storm and I don’t have that kind of money, honey.”

Your little rhyme makes him laugh. When he settles, his brows knit with curiosity. “What would happen to the other horses? If you left, I mean.”

“They aren’t mine, technically all the horses that are used for group riding don’t have individual owners. If someone decided they wanted one, they could make an offer to the ranch and they’d probably get it.” You explain. “The ranch would just look for a replacement at some point.”

The look on Seungmin’s face tells you he’s deep in thought, a little wrinkle to his brow. You lift your fingers to gently smooth his forehead. “Don’t worry about it. It’s been a while since any of the horses were sold anyways,” you assure him. 

His features soften under your touch, he looks at you with trust in his eyes. “Wouldn’t it be cool if all our horses could just stay together forever? Just like us?” 

It’s your turn to soften at his posed question. “That’s a long time.”

“I plan to make it a long time. With Stray Kids and with you.” His words send butterflies fluttering in your belly. 

“I hope you’re right,” you whisper. Dreams of forever planting like a seed in your heart that you’re ready to nurture over time until it comes true.

“But for now, I think it’d be in our best interests if we get up,” he says with a sigh. You giggle when he flops onto his back dramatically. 

“You’re right. I need to keep a roof over Storm’s head.” 

With a big flourish, you throw the blankets off of both of you, earning a yelp of surprise before he jumps out of bed to chase you around the house. It’s the most fun you’ve ever had getting ready in the morning, playing a game of cat and mouse, or fetch per say, in random spurts like the two of you are still in grade school.

It’s not so fun when you finally have to separate. He gives you a long hug and a briefer kiss when he gets the text that his ride has arrived. You watch him leave, offering a wave to his tinted window, even if you can’t see him through it. 

A deep sigh escaping now that you’re officially alone. Back to a normal day, the only saving grace being your best friend working right alongside you.

~*~

~*~

taglist 

@kangaracha @rainfallingfromthesky @puppysmileseungmin @defnotfertilizedtoesw @teenyfinds 

@bbokari711 @lakoya @chlodavids @rylea08 @chanshugsaretherapy

@palindrome969 @here-to-read-and-read-fics @imagine-all-the-imagines @txnwvc @keepswingin

[yoonvvs]

𖼥ৎ can i tell you a secret? ₍ yoonjin ₎

yoonah decided it was finally time to tell everyone about her and hyunjin. but at the end of the night - she wonders if hyunjin is the right man.

now playing > casual by chappell roan

yoonah always loved to try to count the amount of the stars in the sky. her and her little sister would sneak out of the house late at night and sit on the swings next to her house, yoonah would count the stars out loud, while her sister would sing a childern's song she learned from school. night was always so peaceful for yoonah, that's why she found it so hard to fall asleep at night, like she was now, sitting on the balcony of the dorm, snuggled in an old sweatshirt and hyunjin's pj pants.

night was a time where it felt like the whole wide world was quiet, where there was no obligations, no song to record, no dance to learn, and no reason to be looking her best. no one expected anything, no one needed anything. it was time for only her, her thoughts, and the stars. some nights she found herself fighting to stay awake just to cherish the time where it was just her, and no one else.

this time really allowed her to think, to ponder about her life. and tonight's topic, was about hyunjin. most of her nights she spent thinking about hyunjin. if he ate enough, if he was happy, the memories they shared together. but tonight, it was a little different.

it had been a month since they debuted. a month since district nine was released, a month since her life was changed forever. idol life wasn't what she expected it to be - she was alot more busy than she anticipated, but she loved it. she loved peforming on the stage, and she loved seeing all the hard work the ten of them had put in finally pay off. she loved meeting all the new fans, she loved hearing them cheer for her, cheer for them.

but, it had been a month since it all started, and as she reflected on her short career, she remembered seungmin's words from all of those nights ago.

"you have a month after debut to tell them."

well, they sailed their ship, they were all closer than ever, and yoonah never broke a promise. she had to tell the members. but, some things have changed since that promise was made. hyunjin had took her on a date, to a old theatre, where they watched a simple rom-com and shared a tin of popcorn. and then he took her on a couple more dates, each one better than the last, and eventually, he asked her to be her girlfriend.

it was so odd, to be dating someone without anyone knowing. she didn't even tell her best friend from high school that they were together. and while it made yoonah feel more secure about telling the members - it also made it more scary. they were more committed to each other now, and more strings were attached. sometimes she wished that the members would just figure it out, and be okay with it, and move on, but she knew it wouldn't be as easy as that.

yoonah was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the balcony door open, smiling when she saw jisung emerge from the door, sitting on the chair next her.

"what are you doing awake?" yoonah asked, smiling when jisung yawned, brushing his hair out of her face. it wasn't a rare occasion for one of the members to come check on her in the middle of the night, usually it was chan coming out to tell her to go to bed, or to just sit with her in silence. yoonah never wanted to be the first one to leave, so chan almost always had to carry the girl back to her bed when she fell asleep in her chair.

"jeongin woke me up when he went to the bathroom, and i was thirsty." jisung shared, showing the girl a glass of water. "what are you thinking about tonight?"

yoonah sighed, turning from the boy and looking back at the stars. she really wanted to be honest with him, she needed someone to talk to about it. someone that wasn't seungmin, who would only get upset, and hyunjin, who would get scared. perhaps jisung would understand.

"i'm thinking about hyunjin, to be honest with you." yoonah said, not daring to turn her head to look at jisung. she hoped that jisung had enough intuition to figure out what she was laying out, because if though she needed someone to talk to, it was scary to say the truth out loud, especially after hiding it for so long.

"you fight, or something?" jisung asked, smiling when yoonah shook her head, "let me guess - you got a little something something going on with him?" jisung said, laughing when yoonah only nodded in defeat.

"and i'm not sure how to break the news. i feel like chan would kill me, and changbin would definitely kill him." yoonah said, finally turning her head to look at the boy.

"nah, changbin wouldn't kill him. he wouldn't take away your happiness. he would only threaten him some. on the other hand, chan....i feel like he'd be a little disapointed. give him a few days, i think he would come around." jisung said, smiling when yoonah only frowned. "all of us aren't idiots, i noticed at least that you smile more around hyunjin. and it isn't your typical smile. you just, you seem more alive when you are with him."

"but how do i tell everyone else? seungmin already knows, but he was upset about it. why can't everyone just take it like you? and you can barely stand hyunjin!" yoonah exclaimed, brushing her hands through her hair in frustration. "im so scared that i'm going to be shunned or something, i'm just scared i'm going to cause issues in our group. we just debuted, too."

"they won't shun you. and not everyone is going to be like me and not care, but that's on them. you're a smart girl, i have my trust in you to not let this relationship impact the group. but, i would suggest telling chan first. and then break the news to each of them after. if chan is ok with it, then the rest of them would be too." jisung suggested, patting the girls leg.

"as much as i wish i could give you advice all night, i'm tired. and we need to be awake early tomorow, so you should probably go to bed too." jisung said, looking over at yoonah. yoonah sighed and looked at he watch, frowning when the clock already read midnight.

"i suppose so," yoonah mumbled, pushing herself up and following jisung back into the dorm. when she made it back into her warm bed, all she could think about was what chan's face would look like when she broke the news to him that she was dating hyunjin, and she couldn't deny that it left an uneasy pit in her stomach.

the next day, she couldn't stop thinking about her and jisung's conversation the night prior. his words brought some comfort to the girl - she was so worried that the boys would be upset, mad, or disappointed in her, she dreaded it. but jisung was right - they all wouldn't be upset for too long. it was her life and her relationship, she knew that even if they didn't like, they would have to get over it and forgive her eventually, right?

because while she was nervous to tell the members, she was more terrified that she would loose hyunjin in the process. what if they made them break up? what if hyunjin decided she wasn't worth the awkwardness or the arguing? what if one day he decides she isn't who he wants anymore, and leaves her? jisung said he trusted her - but the reality is, she knew it would be challenging if they did end up splitting up.

yoonah sighed, bringing her knees to her chest and throwing her face in her faces, a headache starting to arise from her worries. this seemed like too much for a eighteen year old girl to deal with.

"what's wrong, yoonie?" hyunjin asked, sliding down the wall of the practice room to sit next to her, handing her a water bottle.

"head hurts." yoonah mumbled, taking the water from hyunjin and drinking it. it provided some relief to her now pounding headache. "thought too much."

"what about?"

yoonah looked over at hyunjin, forcing a small smile. it was only the two of them in the practice so far, both of them were still waiting for the rest of the members to arrive to practice.

"have you thought about telling the members about us?" yoonah asked, chuckling slightly when hyunjin's eyes widened, his ears turning red slightly. "we made a promise to seungmin we would tell them after we debuted, jisung already knows. that leaves six members. but still scary."

"wait, how does jisung know?" hyunjin asked, furrowing his eyebrows slightly. yoonah smiled slightly - it would seem a bit odd to hyunjin for jisung to know so early, considering their drama they had before debut.

"we talked last night, he told me to tell chan first. but, that feels like waking up a bear." yoonah joked, trying to make the situation seem less scary than it actually was. if all ten of them were simply just friends, she wouldn't be as terrified - but while they are very close with each other, their are more factors to the situation than their friendship.

they were idols - an occupation where everything about you was overanalyzed, where every picture of you was zoomed in, people trying to find out anything about your personal life - even the type of chapstick you use. while she knew what she signed up for, it made things like romantic relationships hard. especially where fans and companies would act if you committed a crime if you dated someone.

"well - chan would defiently be one to start with. i mean, get the hard part of the way. maybe we will get lucky and he will yell so loud we won't have to tell the other members." hyunjin suggested, slight edge in his voice. yoonah only glared at him.

"you aren't helping me stay positive." yoonah said, biting her lip to keep herself from smiling when hyunjin gave her a hug.

practice went by like a breeze - all of the members acted like normal. like nothing was going on, even hyunjin was able to act disrectly with her, holding her hand and resting his head on her shoulder when no one was looking. she knew that once the secret was finally out, she would miss the thrill of hiding their relationship, perhaps the secret touches won't feel so special anymore, once everyone knew.

but then she would finally be able to get rid of the anxiety. minho had mentioned cooking dinner for everyone - so yoonah knew, she had to tell them then. there was no other time where should could get all of the members together, in the peace of their own home, and most importantly, no other staff in the room.

when she got home, she went straight to her bedroom, hoping to get atleast some time by herself to rehearse what she was going to say. sitting at her desk, she stared at herself in her mirror, taking deep breaths and hyping herself up, rehearsing what she would say. she knew the prep wasn't going to help anything, because she knew when she was going to start to tell them, everything would leave her brain. but it helped her feel better.

soon enough, dinner time rolled around, and she was seated at the kitchen table, surrounded by her nine members. hyunjin was sitting on her left, and jeongin was on her right. throughout the night, all ten of them had laughed, talked about nonsense, and yoonah allowed herself to smile, to relax, to take the relationship situation out of her mind for awhile. but when things had started to calm down and every one's plates were empty, she knew she had to act now. before everyone went off for bed.

yoonah cleared her throat, looking around at the members, smiling nervously when everyone looked at her in confusion. "i have a secret to tell you guys." yoonah whispered out, twisting the ends of her hair as she watched the boys look at her more intently.

"what did you do, did you break something again?" felix asked, referencing the time she dropped one of the members candles months ago. the rest of the boys laughed, but yoonah stayed quiet, she wish it was something as simple as that.

"no....hyunjin and I, we're dating. we have been for a few weeks." yoonah breathed out, placing her hand on her chest in attempt to control her breathing. she felt like she needed to gasp for air, like all of it was sucked out of her, but she had to stay confiscated, at least until she could sneak back into her room.

"dating? did i hear that right?" chan asked, his brows furrowing when yoonah only nodded. he had a face of disapointment, just like she expected, but she couldn't find a trace of anger or resentement. jisung and seungmin looked unbothered, but when she saw a glimpse of a smile when she looked over at jisung.

felix only looked shocked, his mouth slightly agape, and jeongin seemed like he was in deep thought, and yoonah had to guess that he was thinking about the pairs behaviors, trying to connect the dots.

minho seemed slightly angry - but at the same time he looked pained, she wasn't too sure what was the leading emotion.

"why do think this is going to benefit the group in any way? did you ever stop to think about the consequences?" chan asked, crossing his arms when he looked at the pair, sighing when neither of them answered. "we sacrificed so much to debut, and now you want to play this dangerous game? if the company finds out, both of you could loose the dream you worked so hard for. we all could. but you wanted to gamble that just so you guys can kiss and hold hands?"

"it's not like that - we know the weight of our actions. we're just casual, anyways. yes we're dating...but it's nothing serious." hyunjin said, and yoonah felt like her heart stopped beating. everything became quiet, her breathing stilled. casual? nothing serious? was that all the relationship was for hyunjin?

theyve only been dating for a week, but they were chasing after each other for a whole year before he even asked her out. she told him all her secrets, she told him all her insecurities, she was vulnerable with him. they slept in the same bed, they kissed and they hugged. and yoonah poured so much love into hyunjin, but to him..it was merely casual.

how could he define their relationship with such a plain word? he knew his weight of his actions? then he must know how she could feel her heart breaking, tears swelling up in her eyes, because someone that she saw the world in, the person she spent hours and hours of the day thinking about, the person she defined as her reason to keep going, the person who made her smile each day, said she wasn't anything serious to him.

chans voice made her tune back into the conversation, forcing herself to swallow down the pain, just for awhile longer.

"like that makes it so much better," chan said sarcastically, shaking his head. "i have to admit - i can tell you make each other happy. i think we all could see it. but it just bothers me you both let this get so far, without saying a word to any of us." chan said, uncrossing his arms. "but i'm not going to make you guys break up. but if you do something stupid, i swear to god."

"we won't do anything stupid, i promise." yoonah choked out, blinking quickly in attempt to see clearly, cursing her tears for disorienting her. "if i do, i'll leave."

"no one is leaving the group, regardless if something happens." changbin said, sending the girl a reassuring look. "if we survived the survival show together, then we can survive just about anything. we're a team." changbin says, nodding strongly.

the table was silent for awhile, everyone avoiding eye contact, yoonah looking at the painting in the living room, as if it would give her words of advice, solve all her problems, or magically make them go away. eventually, jeongin broke the silence.

"i'm happy for you, yoonah. he makes you happy, happier than what i have seen you." jeongin said, awkwardly patting the girls shoulder, yoonah thanked him, attempting a soft smile. hyunjin did make her happy - but it was hard to say anything positive right now when he just crushed her heart.

"if does anything to hurt you....i'll beat him," minho said in joking voice, but yoonah knew he really meant it. he was insanely protective over her, always making sure wasn't walking on the road side, hiding her when she was getting out of the car, and protecting her as they walked through crowds of fans, even if there was bodyguards.

"i think we all should go to sleep, and we can talk about this again later, we had a long day." felix suggested, standing up to stretch. yoonah took the oppurtunity, leaving the table first, and heading straight to her room, locking the door behind her. she changed into her pajamas, tucking herself into the bed.

and then she let the tears fall, replaying hyunjin's words over and over agian, the disappointment in chan's face, the anger in minho's, and the unamused look in seungmin's. she regretted it all. how could she let it go so far? why did she let herself invest so much into someone that didn't have the same amount of feelings back? she couldn't help but feel neglected by hyunjin. he never once defended her from scoldings, he never helped her when she was anxious in the crowd, and now he called her "casual". for yoonah, it felt far from casual.

her last thought before she fell asleep, was wondering if he was truly worth all of the pain. if she made the right choice telling him she'd be his girlfriend.

she wasn't too sure about the answer.

[marcelloshdz]

rumors

summary: when some photos of marcello reach your feed, you can't help but read into them. requested by anonymous.

a/n: we all know ~the photos~, so i hope y'all don't mind that i didn't name drop 😭

"baby, i know you said i could come with you tonight, but i'm really not feeling up for a party." you sighed as you watched marcello getting ready for the evening. 

"no worries. i'll probably be home early then." he said to you.

"you don't have to cut your night short on account of me." 

"i don't have to, but i want to." he said, turning to you with a smile. he walked over to you on the bed, pressing a kiss to your lips before leaving the room. you walked him out, kissing him good bye and wishing him a good night.

after marcello left, you moved to the living room and spent the evening at home watching movies, ordering take out, and resting after the stressful week you'd had. it felt good to take time to your self, but you admittedly missed marcello and wished he was home with you. but you didn't want to damper his evening by requesting that he stay home with you.

you fell asleep on the couch a little while later, after you finished your dinner. a few hours later, you were woken up by the front door opening.

"ah shit, sorry." marcello said when he noticed he'd startled you.

"what time is it?" you asked, sleep still heavy in your voice.

"just after 11." he said quietly. "i told you i'd be home early." he added, pressing a kiss to your forehead. he pulled you up from the couch and you stumbled into the bedroom, flopping onto the bed. you got comfortable in the blankets, marcello joining you after he changed into his sleep clothes. he wrapped his arms around you, the both of you quickly falling asleep. 

the next morning, marcello had filled you in on the events of the evening, telling you about the people he'd gotten to see and meet. he joked that despite having a good time at the party, he still wished you'd been with him to enjoy it as well. 

a few weeks passed since that night, and everything was going good, until it all of a sudden wasn't.

your social media presence really only consisted of your instagram account that you largely only used for posting about your work and upcoming projects. but one day, you were bored at home, and decided to scroll for a bit. you were on your explore page when you noticed a picture of marcello edited next to some model that you'd met once. you opened the post, reading the caption that read something along the lines of marcello and this model being seen at the party together reportedly getting frisky with each other. you scrolled through the post, seeing pictures that were taken of them at the party, and as much as you didn't want to believe them, the pictures sure did say a thousand words. unfortunately, this also put you in the middle of cheating rumors, as well as her boyfriend, which was the last thing that you wanted to deal with.

although you didn't question marcello or his loyalty to you, as you'd been with marcello forever. you met your freshman year of high school, and made it through long distance while you were in college before you moved to be with him in new york. but you couldn't help but let your mind wonder.

you thought to text marcello about it, but you knew this was a conversation you needed to have in person. instead, you just text asking him when he thought he was gonna be home. he replied, saying that he was getting ready to leave work and be on his way home shortly. 

"thank god." you said, not wanting to stew in your thoughts for too long. you tried to keep yourself busy while you waited for marcello to get home, which proved easier said than done. you had to force yourself from jumping from the couch once you heard marcello's keys unlocking the front door. 

"hey, is everything okay?" he asked as he came inside. he sat with you on the couch, arm drapped over the back cushions behind you.

"i need to talk to you about something." you began, taking a deep breath before you continued. marcello's eyes were locked on yours, waiting for you to continue. "was there anything else that happened at that party the other night?" you asked him.

"not that i remember. i told you everything." he said, shaking his head. you took another deep breath before reaching for your phone. you opened your photos, pulling up the screenshots you took of the instagram posts. you placed your phone in his hand, watching silently as he studied the screen in front of him. 

"before you say anything, i just want you to know that i'm not accusing you of anything. you know i trust you with my life. but i just want an explanation, becuase i know how this looks, and i already know the shit that's gonna come from this. i just want to get ahead of any rumors." you said, and marcello nodded. 

"y/n, i swear on my life that nothing happened. i didn't even realize these pictures had been taken, but i promise that what you see here is the beginning and end of anything between us. she was super drunk, and stumbling all over the place. i was just helping her off of the floor so she could get home." he explained to you. 

you listened intently as marcello spoke, taking his words to heart, knowing that he was genuine.

"y/n, you know me. we've been together for over ten years, you have all my loyalty, and my entire heart. i would never do that to you."

"i know, but even after all this time i still sometimes get in my head about it all. especially now that we've both come into these huge followings, and have a lot more eyes on us. i just don't want people to get the wrong ideas about us."

"no matter what people think about us, we know that truth, and that's all that should matter." he said to you. you felt his arm move from the couch cushions and wrap around your shoulders. "i love you. more than anything in this world. i would never do anything to jeopardize what we have." 

"i love you too." you said, as he pulled you into his arms. he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, squeezing you tight.

"con todo mi corazón."

[jeyusosqueen]

One Shot (Jey Uso x reader)

Joshua had been your friend since the sandbox days. Always looking after you like an older brother almost. Whenever the other kids picked on you he would punch their asses out no question. Even through middle school he had your back. Though middle school was different, feelings between the both of you changed. And what was friendship turned into puppy love. High school puppy love turned into something real.  8th Grade was it? Yeah 8th Grade the tides changed

“Y/N, I was thinking…what if, what if we were boyfriend and girlfriend? I mean we grew up together as kids. I cant help I’m feeling some type of way about you. “ You heard him say. Your insides then felt like butterflies, good butterflies though.  Freshman year was something and then what happened? He met Kecia. That BITCH. She who took everything away from you. Your heart was forever broken

*Flashforward to 2010*

“Girl! “ You heard your friend Amber say “Girl! Look I got tickets to a show, a wrestling show! You’re coming with me! “ You had been a wrestling fan but never followed it, not until now. “Okay, give me a minute. “ You said as you went to get ready. 

*Showtime*

Your best friend had gone all out and got ringside tickets. Then all of a sudden you heard music, the Usos theme playing. You saw Jonathan and then there he was. Joshua  “Girl, I feel a little sick, I might go to the-“ Amber held your arm “Girl, sit down! Relax a little bit. “ You started “But him-… “ Amber smiled and looked to you ���I know, girl. He knows your here. “ Throughout Jey’s match you couldnt help but feel like he knew you were there. Jey went for the pin as the Usos won the match.

*Aftershow*

You and Amber were getting ready to leave. But you felt a strong hand and a very familiar voice “Hey Y/N, wait up, Uce. “ Shit you thought to yourself. Joshua pulled you in his strong arms for a hug “Been a long time, Uce. Looking good as hell. Hey Jon, you remember Y/N, dont you?!?! “ You saw his twin look at you and grin “Hey girl, you gotta come to Waffle House with us! Want to? “ You saw your best friend nod as if she were encouraging you “Alright then. After all some chocolate chip waffles sound pretty good. “ They laughed as you got in the car with them

In the car you felt Jey’s arm around you. You two were catching up and stuff about that. He mentioned his divorce as you frowned and rested a hand on his arm “I’m sorry, Josh. But how are the boys coping with this? “ She knew of his boys and he looked a little surprised at that but he answered “They doing okay. They just mad at us, they’re old enough to know whats up. Especially Jaciyah…him getting in that high school age now. “ High school where everything changed for you both. 

You thought of the snatched kisses and embraces you both would share. The dates, even the date to the fair was always a favorite of yours. You got out of the car and went into Waffle House ordering dinner. She sat next to him and saw Trinity joining with Jon. Trinity made you feel at ease “Hey Y/N, I’m Trinity, Jon’s wife! “ She held out her hand as you shook it. Trinity was making you laugh as you suddenly began to relax. Trinity said “Girl, what are we gonna do with these two? “ You laughed and smiled “Girl, I dont know…they wont let us lock them away. “ The four of you laughed as you felt Josh’s arm around your waist. You chuckled nervously but smiled as Josh said “We go back, this one and I do. She’s special. “ Him calling you special, it made your heart race. All was okay now. Now what was gonna happen in the future? Time would tell

@charmed-dreamssss @nayys-world

[poiibbtt]

A Little Bit Like Forever

Pairing: Dokyeom x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Friends-to-Lovers, High School Romance

Word Count: ~4,500

Synopsis: Middle school chaos, high school awkwardness, and a love hidden beneath playful teasing. From sneaky stolen bags to whispered confessions in a dim classroom, you and Dokyeom were always a little bit of everything—until prom night, where a few photobooth pictures capture the moment when "just friends" becomes something a little bit like forever.

A/N: Hi, I'm new here! I really hope you enjoy this fluffy Dokyeom (aka Dikeyyy) fanfic. My English might not be the best, but I put all my heart into this story! Let me know what you think, and thank you for reading! 🖤

Middle school was weird, but somehow, it was fun. Sitting in the middle of two boys, Dino on the left and Dokyeom on the right, felt like a tiny pocket of chaos that made you forget how awkward everything else was. You weren't close with anyone else in that class, but with Dino and Dokyeom, it felt like… a compromise. You let them doodle on your hands—swirls, random lines, some silly drawings—because, well, what else was there to do?

“Stop moving,” Dokyeom said one day, drawing some weird stick figure on your wrist. You laughed.

“Why? You trying to make me look cooler?” you joked, raising an eyebrow.

“Pffft,” Dino added with a smirk. “Cooler? Sure, if you want to look like a walking art project from a 5-year-old.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Wow, Dino, so supportive. Love that for me.”

But as fun as it was, things changed. Dino’s girlfriend, Mindy, didn’t exactly love your dynamic. She got jealous—angrily-so. Once she threw a fit so loud, half the school knew about it, and suddenly, everything felt off. When the seating arrangement changed, you were left out. Dino and Dokyeom hung out with the boys, and you… well, you made new friends, but group projects felt lonelier. Everyone paired up with their besties, and the boys? They didn’t choose you anymore. It stung more than you’d like to admit. You wondered if you were the only one who thought those days sitting together were special.

High school started, and Dino moved to China. It was just you and Dokyeom again, but this time, he sat behind you. You had Wonnie now, your partner-in-crime. Life seemed less lonely, at least until Dokyeom decided to continue being his usual playful self.

One day, you noticed your bag had mysteriously disappeared after class.

“Has anyone seen my bag?” you called out, frantically searching the classroom. A chorus of chuckles erupted from the back.

You glanced at Dokyeom, and there it was—his trademark smug grin.

“Okay, where’s my bag, Dokyeom?” you asked, crossing your arms.

“Oh, I don’t know, Y/N,” he said, shrugging innocently. But his smile said otherwise.

The boys were still laughing, and as soon as you found your bag tucked behind the locker, you stormed back toward Dokyeom. Without hesitation, you wrapped your hands around his neck, mock-choking him.

“You think this is funny?” you grumbled, tightening your playful grip.

He didn’t flinch. In fact, he just placed his hand over yours, his smile growing wider. “You really think you’re scary?”

You groaned, rolling your eyes. “Get out of here, dork.”

Then, it began: the daily texts from Dokyeom. At first, it was harmless. “Do we have any homework?” or “What was the page number for that assignment?” Simple stuff. You replied because you figured he was just lazy.

Until one day, during a quiz, his teammate Mingyu—a giant compared to the rest of the team—walked by your class. As the room fell into a sudden silence, he called out, “DOKYEOM!” and then, without skipping a beat, added, “Y/N! He likes you!”

Twice. He repeated it twice, just to make sure the message landed.

Your class? Dead silent. The teacher? Silent. Everyone? Absolutely, painfully silent. You were pretty sure time stopped. As your heart raced, you pretended like you hadn’t heard a thing. You passed the quiz sheets to the back like nothing happened, handing them to Dokyeom who sat there, not breathing, waiting for your reaction.

You didn’t give him one. Instead, you turned and asked, “Got the cells labeled yet?”

The entire room seemed to exhale at once, and time started moving again.

Later, you whispered to yourself, “I’m going to kill Mingyu when I see him.”

After that, things shifted. Dokyeom started texting you every day—not just about homework, but everything. From stories about Seungkwan hogging the bathroom to watch streamers, to Minghao pulling off ridiculous thirst traps for TikTok.

“And guess what Seungkwan did today?” Dokyeom messaged you one night.

You rolled your eyes but smiled at your phone. “What now?”

“He almost flooded the place because he was too busy watching Mobile Legends. And now everyone has to take shorter showers. Mingyu’s so mad, it’s hilarious.”

“You guys live like frat boys, I swear.”

Somehow, the messages made you feel… closer. And then, Dokyeom brought up middle school.

“Remember how Dino and I used to draw on your hand?” he asked one night.

“Yeah,” you typed back. “I figured it was just to pass the time.”

“Nah, we actually liked sitting with you.”

You paused, reading that over again. So, it wasn’t just you. The memories weren’t one-sided.

But the more you started to realize that you might like him, the harder it became to talk to him. You’d freeze up, getting tongue-tied whenever he was around. Dokyeom, on the other hand, seemed to hover around you more. Every time you looked up, he was already watching you, his eyes catching yours before you could look away.

Wonnie noticed, of course. “You two are ridiculous,” she teased, nudging you one day.

“What?” you replied, cheeks reddening.

“Don’t ‘what’ me. He’s literally attached to you at the hip.”

As if on cue, Dokyeom appeared at your table during a group project, not even in your group, just… there.

You glared at him. “Don’t you have work to do with your own group?”

“I’m more interested in what you’re doing,” he said, sliding into a seat next to you.

You groaned internally, but secretly? You liked the attention.

One afternoon, during a free class when everyone else was napping, Dokyeom found you. The classroom was dim, curtains drawn, and the soft hum of air conditioning filled the air. He sat beside you, closer than usual, and playfully took your hand in his.

“Your hand’s so small,” he mused, gently tracing your fingers with his. His lashes fluttered as he glanced down, and you found yourself holding your breath.

Your heart thudded in your chest, and you couldn’t help but think how close he was. So close that you could see the faint flecks of gold in his eyes. So close that… your thoughts scattered when his thumb brushed your palm.

“Is this weird?” he asked quietly.

You shook your head, but your voice didn’t seem to work, so you just sat there, hearts beating loudly in the stillness.

Another day, you walked into school, your stomach aching slightly, probably from the nerves. You passed by Dokyeom, who was sitting on the stairs with Soonyoung and Woozi. As soon as he saw you, he stood up, ditching his friends to walk alongside you.

“Not waiting for them?” you asked, tilting your head curiously.

“Nah,” Dokyeom said, his lips curling into that sheepish smile. “Only waiting for you.”

You tried to hide your blush, especially when Irene, one of the basketball girls, spotted the two of you together. She smirked, as if she’d seen something juicy that would spread like wildfire through the school.

But in that moment, it didn’t matter. Dokyeom walked you to class, and you two chatted like the world outside didn’t exist.

Then came the teasing—especially from Dokyeom’s coach during basketball practice.

“Y/N, you’ve got Dokyeom all flustered these days,” the coach teased, his eyes glinting with amusement. Your face burned red as you tried to smile through it.

When you passed the gym one afternoon on your way home, the boys started calling out, “Dokyeom, Dokyeom!” You rolled your eyes, though you couldn’t help the giddy feeling rising in your chest.

Later that night, Dokyeom messaged you, “Are you okay?”

You laughed, replying, “Mingyu needs to shut his mouth.”

As time went on, Dokyeom kept showing up—whether it was asking you to watch his games or just hanging around with you, Wonnie, and the others. One time, after begging you a million times to come watch a competition, you finally caved. Wonnie and Lisa came along for moral support (and for Lisa to cheer for her own basketball game).

The competition started, and Dokyeom—usually so confident on the court—was… off.

“Why does he look so nervous?” Lisa whispered to you.

“I have no idea,” you whispered back, watching him stumble over a pass.

When the game ended and it was time to go, you waved goodbye to him from the stands. “Good luck, Dokyeom!” you called out, and he waved back, giving you that shy smile that always made your heart skip a beat.

Lisa nudged you. “He was totally off his game because you were here.”

You grinned. “He’ll never admit it.”

Day by day, the countdown to graduation passed like a blur of final exams, senior pranks, and long talks about the future. And then, suddenly, it was prom night.

You were partnered with Dokyeom as prom dates, which everyone saw coming a mile away—even though he’d asked with that awkward, shy smile he’d never quite outgrown. The night of prom, you found yourself in a sleek black dress, feeling confident but nervous. When Dokyeom arrived to pick you up, the sight of him in a black suit was enough to make your heart skip. He looked so handsome—too handsome, honestly.

But if you thought you were nervous, Dokyeom was a whole other level. He could barely look you in the eyes when you walked out.

"You… uh… look great," he mumbled, scratching the back of his neck as his eyes darted everywhere except at you. His cheeks were flushed, and you could barely suppress a smile.

"You look pretty good yourself, Dokyeom," you teased, but that only made him turn even redder.

Prom was everything it was supposed to be—music, dancing, and laughter—but the real highlight came when you dragged Dokyeom to the photobooth set up in the corner. You’d convinced him to take photos together, even though he looked like he might faint from the sheer proximity.

“Come on, it’s just a few photos,” you said, grabbing his hand and pulling him in.

He looked at you and then quickly looked away, his voice low. "It's the dress. It's messing with my head. Stop looking at me like that."

You laughed, nudging him lightly. "Stop being so shy, it's just me."

But despite his shyness, he agreed, and you both stepped into the booth. You took the first pose, smiling hard, and when the flash went off, Dokyeom was grinning too—though you could tell he was still flustered.

For the second pose, you turned to him with a mischievous glint in your eye. Without warning, you kissed him on the cheek just as the camera snapped the picture. Dokyeom’s eyes widened, and his smile grew so big, he looked like he might burst from happiness.

By the third pose, you two were looking at each other, and the air felt a little different. More charged. Dokyeom’s gaze softened as he looked at you, and then he whispered, “You’re so pretty, you know? My heart is about to burst. Stop it.”

Before you could respond, he raised a hand and gently covered your eyes.

“What are you doing?” you asked, laughing softly under your breath.

“Just trust me,” he murmured, and you did. In the fourth pose, you felt his soft lips against yours, so quick and gentle, but enough to make your own heart race. When he pulled back, his face was bright red, and yours wasn’t far behind. You both sat there for a second, staring at each other, the weight of the moment sinking in.

Dokyeom was the first to break, covering his face with his hands. “You’re killing me, stop staring like that.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at how adorably nervous he was. “I like it when you’re all shy like this. It’s cute.”

He groaned, gently pushing you away with a smile. “Seriously, stop it. You’re making it worse.” But then his expression softened, and he took your hand again, squeezing it gently. “I love you, [Y/N].”

Your heart melted, and you couldn’t help but tease him one last time. “I love you too, Dikeyyy.”

Just as you were about to say something more, the curtain of the photobooth flew open, and the boys burst in like a whirlwind of chaos.

“Soarin’ like dolphins!” Mingyu announced dramatically. “C’mon, we want our turn!”

Dokyeom shot them a death glare, but you couldn’t stop laughing as you both stumbled out of the booth. The moment was over, but it was something you’d never forget.

[badfanfictionaire]

It’s not unusual for a vampire to go their whole existence wishing to find someone to spend forever with.  They’ll probably have five or six lovers over their lifetime, until they inevitably got snuffed out by some happy-go-lucky monster hunter and perish like a pathetically mortal soul.  But, they’ll probably never find the one before that. Eddie’s never heard of a vampire meeting their soulmate, at least not in real life.  Lore would suggest that women swoon over vampire lords, and swear allegiance to them for as long as they both shall live.  But, lore would also have you believe that all vampires can turn into bats (which, bummer, they can’t), and that they’re all allergic to garlic (which again is untrue, garlic bread is delicious) (Why is it that only the shitty parts of lore are true, like the whole stake through the heart bit?). In Eddie’s experience, the minute you ask a girl if she wants to spend forever forever with you, she freaks the fuck out and takes off.  (Which, ouch??)

Needless to say, Eddie doesn’t even consider the possibility that he might meet his soulmate backstage at a talent show in some podunk town in Indiana.  Life gets boring as hell when you’ve been alive for six hundred some odd years, so, from time to time he liked to get creative with his human persona.  In 1980 he decided that with a buzzcut and ill-fitting clothes, he could probably still pass as a middle schooler, especially if Wayne told the school he’d been held back or something.  So he decides to try going back to school.  He kind of underestimated how different school was going to be in 1980 though, given that he hadn’t been in school since the 1960s.  Things had changed a lot, and he stuck out like a sore thumb.  

He met Christine Elizabeth Cunningham on September 12th, 1980, and he just knew he had to win her over some how.  By 1986, he’d realized that was going to be a lot harder than he’d anticipated…

But, in March of that year, he caught a break, Chrissy broke up with her long-time boyfriend and needed a shoulder to cry on.  And it just so happened he had not one but two leather-clad shoulders to offer.  And so, offer he did.  As luck would have it, having existed for six hundred-some-odd years finally paid off, because if there was one thing he’d become quite proficient at in his life it was being a good listener.  Tearfully she told him everything, from how controlling her mother was to how much of a moldy schnitzel Jason was. 

Somehow they ended up back at his place and got high, laying with their faces inches apart on his bed. 

“Can I tell you a secret?” 

She nods. 

“I’m a vampire,” he whispers.

She giggles. “Sure don’t look like one to me.”

“No? Not even with the pale skin and the whole dark aesthetic?” 

“No,” she says, making grabby hands at him, “You’re too squishy.” 

She scooches a bit closer and her hands land on his shoulders, “You listen to me, Eddie Munson, you are not a mean scary vampire like everyone says you are.  You’re just a big soft teddy bear who wears black and… well, you’re too hot to be a crusty old vampire anyway.”

His breath catches in his throat with the way her big blue eyes bore into his soul, but then she lets out another giggle and he can’t help but laugh too. 

Later, when they’re starting to sober up, he rolls over to face her again. 

“Can I tell you something serious?”

“Anything,” she says. 

“I really am a vampire.”

Her eyes rove over his face, and don’t see any hint of it being a joke. 

“Oh.” 

“Wanna see?” 

“See what?” she asks, her eyebrows furrowing together. 

“My, uh, crusty old vampire fangs?” 

Hesitantly she nods.  Maybe she’s expecting him to produce a pair of those flimsy imitation fangs they sell at Party City, but he knows she’s probably not expecting him to open his mouth and protract his fangs. 

“Holy shit,” she murmurs, her eyes wide.

“I’m sorry,” he says, immediately retracting them and regretting having frightened her.  She was just so disarming, he couldn’t help it.  He wanted her to know him, the real him, even if it meant they only had today. 

“What for?” 

“I’m a monster, Chrissy,” he says, feeling his face flush with embarrassment. 

“Hey, look at me,” she says, her tiny fingers pushing his chin back up so his eyes meet hers again, “You are not a monster, Eddie.  I mean, maybe in the literal sense, but, in all the other ways? I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who was less of a monster than you.”

“Sweetheart-”

“Whatever self-deprecating you’re going to say, I won’t hear it.”

“I shouldn’t have sprung that on you,” he says. 

Chrissy gives him a one-shoulder shrug. 

“You know, you’re not what I thought you’d be like,” she says softly. 

“Mean and scary? Not even with the fangs?” 

She nods, then, “I’m not scared, you know.” 

“You should be.” He brushes his thumb against her cheek. 

“Kiss me?” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Please,” she urges sweetly. 

And so he does, gently, tenderly, with every ounce of himself.  

“I’ve loved you since I first laid eyes on you,” he breathes when they separate for air, “Even back then-”

“Back then?”

“The middle school talent show,” he says, remembering it fondly. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t remember,” she replies, averting her eyes in shame.

“I wouldn’t remember me from back then either,” he assures her, “But, perchance, we could continue from here? Where we are now?”

“I’d like that,” she says, a contented smile replacing her frown. 

It’s much too soon to ask her to be his bride, or to ask for her to join him in the afterlife, but he knows deep down in his heart that one day she’ll agree to both propositions.  He’d wait another hundred years if he had to, as long as it meant he would finally have his soulmate by his side where she belonged.  Thankfully, it doesn’t take nearly that long for his dream to come true. 

In the year 1990, Edward James Munson and Christine Elizabeth Cunningham are united in both holy matrimony and the afterlife.  And so, the young man who once believed he was destined to wander the Earth alone forever, found he was no longer trapped in solitude.  Instead, hand in hand, he and his true love would navigate the world as one.  (Until, ya know, they inevitably got snuffed out by some happy-go-lucky monster hunter and perished like any other pathetic mortal souls.)

👻👻👻👻

(read on AO3)

[vy-writes-for-you]

HEAR ME OUT NOW..

emmett forrest and -

a reader who GOT AN ELECTRIC SHOCK TRYING TO UNPLUG HER PHONE FROM A CHARGER AND THEN HIT HER HEAD AGAINST A TABLE

I SWEAR TO GOD I AM SO SELF REFLECTING THIS ALSO HAPPENED TO ME LIKE A FEW MONTHS AGO STORYTIME SOMEDAY but here's a challenge :3

-ur favorite 🎀 anon

Hey 🎀!! I hope you like it, it's kinda rushed but it's fine lol

"Charger"

Pairing(s): Emmett Forrest x Reader

Summary: After receiving a shock (literally), you realize that it's about time for a new charger.

Rating: PG/Fluff

Warnings: None really, reader gets a light electric shock (not enough to do any actual damage)

W/C: 316

---------------------------------------------------

You'll admit it, your phone charger was old. Very old. It saw you through high school, college, law school, and even the start of your career! It was frayed around both ends, and a little bit of the plastic coating was missing in the middle. And it sat there, just as it always did; charging your phone.

You, as always, went to unplug it as you headed out the door to run some errands, your fiancé in tow. This time however, as you grabbed the cord to pull it from the phone, you were surprised to feel a fairly strong shock.

"Motherf-" You were cut off by Emmett's laughing, despite him being halfway across the room. "And what exactly is so funny?"

"Nothing. It's just- I-" your fiancé gasped between giggles. "I heard that all the way over here. You good?"

You stared at him. He thought it was hilarious that your favorite charger had finally met its end. You, however, felt sad, if only a little.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

Noticing your change in demeanor, Emmett stood up a little straighter and stopped laughing. "Hey, what's wrong? I hope you know that I would never truly laugh at your pain, you just seemed mildly annoyed and then I heard a shock."

"It's not that," you said. "It's just- I've had this thing forever, it's weird now that I probably can't use it again. It literally saw me from fourteen until now."

"Wow, that's a really long time," Emmett stated, with more than a hint of playfulness in his voice.

"Oh fuck off, I'm not that old. I'm younger than you," you retorted.

"Yeah, by like a year and a half, that doesn't count."

"Touché." You smiled at him. "I guess that means it's time for a new charger."

"We can pick up a new one at the store."

"Alright," you sighed. "Then we'd better get going."