#so yes i'm definitely neglecting everything kind of but it's not on purpose and i Am really trying i prommy

[pochapal]

blowing a kiss to my mutuals who i have been sorely neglecting. on account of the Horrors.

[aceouttatime]

Hello, I have come with a few-- not too many just this list here-- questions about the man Sylvan, please please. <3

First, I would love to know just the basics of him and his situation. Age, height (if shrunk, before and after shrink would be lovely), job, general personality and things. What are his flaws/damages that he/the story wants to change or heal? Where do we really get to meet him in his story? What happened before that, did something major lead him here or is something major about to happen? Do you just kind of focus on the one story/life of Sylvan or do you have AUs? Would love to know a bit of the setting(s)!

I'll leave it there for now and then come back with more questions and/or follow ups whenever you have time to answer and I have time to send an ask again <3

Much love to ur face, Belle <3

Hello, dearie! Thank you for your, in all honesty, frighteningly intense interest in my blorbo, Sylvan--it both warms my heart and concerns me just a little haha <3

The Rundown "So, I'll start. My name is Sylvan Okeanoú, and I am a private investigator working for the NYCPD. As we've discussed, and is evident by the fact that I'm standing on your desk, I've been through hell and back in the past twelve hours." -Mr. S. Okeanoú, 2023 Sylvan (he, him, his) is ~31 years old, 6'1, and is probably too smart for his own good. To answer your question, yes, he does end up a bit shorter after a series of unfortunate mishaps that I'll definitely highlight when I actually get around to writing his story. Specifically, he ends up around 4 inches tall, and I can say with certainty that the lad will *not* have a good time with that (at least at first). So, yes, he ends up quite liddol :)))

Flaws n' General Aims of Story Ok, so Syl's most significant flaws are probably his independence and his ego, both of which stem from his upbringing (bits and pieces will probably be revealed throughout the story) and his intrinsic need to prove his worth. His job suits his perfectionism and feeds into his...sliiight...superiority complex. Even so, behind all that cold curtness and false bravado is a severely neglected, softer side riddled with anxiety and distrust that has led to a sense of belonging and loneliness. The story I plan to tell will focus mainly on him opening up and letting himself be okay with reliance on others. Perhaps he doesn't have to be the strong one all the time. It's been a struggle for him to be vulnerable throughout his life, and learning to trust someone in the face of forced vulnerability might bring out a new side of him. Gotta break that toxic machismo somehow--sorry, I don't make the rules, I just break 'em for story purposes XD

Story Framework Well, beyond it being a G/t story, the big, kind of *genre* it falls into is a modern-day detective plot. Okeanoú and his colleagues have been investigating a series of disappearances that have happened over the course of about a year now, consistently coming up empty-handed in terms of new leads. Things are tense, his reputation plummeting, and funding is drying up. If Syl doesn't pull something together soon, more people will get hurt, and all of his hard work will have been for nothing. That low point is where we meet him: desperate for a lead, drunk on lack of sleep, caffeine, and cheap spirits, and even more of a short-tempered prick than he is typical. He finds a strange note, however, that changes everything and kicks off what could be described as the worst month of his life. ;)

AU Shenanigans HMMM...alright, I'll let you in on a secret that's not really much of a secret. I have a University!AU that was originally going to be his main story, but I've since decided didn't have the stakes I was aiming for. It still exists in the recesses of my and @imvenusasaboy 's minds, and we talk about it occasionally. If you've heard me talk about Vir or Viri, that's the universe it was set in. I may do something more with it later, but for now, it's on the mental backburner. I have a good writing buddy that's helped me flesh out some of my ideas for the story, as well as a few very important characters--I'd give her a better shoutout, but she doesn't have a Tumblr, sadly. So, here, thank you fatraccoons for your lovely help! You're a saint <3 Other than that, he's not featured in much else. I do a bunch of artwork of him because I'm a goofball who enjoys pretty men with long hair.

Anywho, that's about it! Thank you bunches for your questions and just being a sweetheart in general! I love your work, and I love you loads, Belle <3 Your friendly-neighborhood-littleman, Alex P.S. Take this Sylvan painting as a lil sneak peak :)

[mysticyuni]

BEYOND THE HORIZON

A short story written by Mystic_Yuni

It was after school when Lilac left the University of Pantaleon. The sun was shining brightly, warming the whole campus. Students rushed through the main gate, laughing and chatting as they made plans to hang out. With exams just over, the excitement in the air was palpable.

For lilac, though, it felt like just another day.

She walked along the cobbled path toward the transport hub. The city of Imus was lively, with towering buildings and busy streets. Colorful shops lined the pedestrian lanes, drawing in shoppers, while streets added to the bustling atmosphere. As she neared the Crosswalks, Lilac felt overwhelmed by the city's energy. Students, workers, and families filled the streets, all deep in conversation.

Despite the city's liveliness, the crowd felt immense for her. Imus was a place where social connections thrived, with parks for gatherings and cafes full of chatters. But for her, the noise and busyness only made her feel more Isolated. She took a deep breath, focusing on her steps as she moved through the crowd, eager to get home quickly.

"Are you tired of your everyday living?"

As she walked to the side railings. A mysterious voice rang just beside her ear. Confused, she turned around to face the unknown quy. He just gave her a warm grin, but her expression remained baffled. She stayed wary of him.

"Who are you?" She asked, her voice tinged with discernment.

"Me? Let's just say a mere traveller – who happens to meet a strange girl here," he then glanced at her eyes, diving in that purplish sea.

But he's the one who is strange here. Suddenly talking with a stranger like her so casually, and even calling her a strange girl, what a suspicious guy. But she can't deny that he's a good looking one. She averted her eyes from him as she continued walking.

He immediately followed her. "What – wait,"

"Why? what do you need?"

"Well..." his lips curved into a smile. "I want to offer you something interesting that would definitely change the course of your life, something really interesting,” as he emphasized the last word. "It's better to accept the offer, it will benefit you greatly."

"Huh, what a strange lad," she turned around again.

"You were neglected by your own family. You want to escape their grasp completely, right? I can take you away from them,”

Her eyes were then filled with surprise. How did he know about that thing? Just who is he? She thought.

"Just ride this exploration."

He suddenly grabbed her hands, then pulled her somewhere. She found herself lost, but enjoying every strange place they visit, like shrines and museums. It was a breath of fresh air. The guy remained by her side all those moments. She doesn't know for what purpose, but why is he so kind to her?

"What is your name? I already said mine earlier," she asked.

*Well... I'm just an operator of this dream. So I don't know."

"A... dream?” Lilac stuttered.

"Yes, this is all just a dream. You carved it. I just happened to be the operator of it," He answered. But his voice seemed so down.

"I can't understand." Her confused eyes trails on the road visible at their side.

He lifted a hand in the air. As if clicking something there, he pressed his fingers on it then swiped something in the air. Everything changes gradually, like a fake environment being altered into a different setting.

Her support on her body got disrupted, as if there's an earthquake. Her eyes widened as she gazed back at him. "Am I dreaming?"

But she didn't see anything when he pressed his finger in the air.

"You are.... and you need to wake up now. Before your body evaporates into nothingness in reality space. You need to go back to your real world."

"But how about you?" she asked.

She became nervous when he smiled bitterly. Their surroundings start withering like a flower that is about to die. Everything is flickering.

“…I am only your creation.”

Out of trance, his skin on his hands started fading away, it crumbled down like a tiny piece of triangle in the air and soon faded away. Lilac was left dumbfounded, unable to open her mouth and call his name. She doesn't know how to call him. He only said he's only an operator of this dream. It was incomplete information about him, and now he's fading away gradually. She couldn't believe what she's seeing right now.

The sky starts shattering in big pieces. Despite the shocking encounter, her eyes were still fixated on him. Before he finally subsided in the thin air, everything crumbled down. Their surroundings, the city, the world, her dream. But for the last time, he offered his hands to invite her.

She held him, oblivious to what was awaiting her.

"You need to wake up now, or you'll die in your bed chamber..."

He suddenly let go of her hands. A haze of fear devoured her.

Everything began slipping from her hands as the sky offered her a blinding light of tomorrow. A new beginning beyond this fake scenario, this fake creation of her. In the horizon she stared, eyes akin to an ocean tainted with hues of blues.

As the surrounding went black.

Lilac wakes up, eyes wet with tears. Her heart felt so heavy that a lump from her throat was trapped. She wants to burst everything into a shock of scream, she wants to cry until the evening dawns. How could she accept the fact that everything that had happened there was just a mere illusion? Her creation she's not aware of.

How could she accept the fact that he's gone now?

She doesn't know.

She doesn't know how to see him again.

Perhaps there was this fondness with him that she never noticed. He made her realize a lot of things. That everything was just temporary, even her hatred.

At the end of the day, her family we're still there and watching her from behind. Things she long neglected. She already accepted the cruel truth and yet he suddenly came to alter completely her views with reality.

He made her realize that there's more beauty than the world could offer her from her daily struggles.

That she just needs to go beyond…

…Beyond the horizon of uncertainties.

It gave her a beautiful insight into this precious life.

And yet, he's not here anymore.

[cheesygroove]

With a roll of the ice

pairing: Wheein x f!reader

c & ws: smut; ice play; sensory deprivation; mentions of alcohol; a lil swearing.

wc: 2k~

requested by anon

Round ice cube molds. You could have just gone for a regular plastic ice tray, the cheaper option at the store. But if it can serve a sexual purpose, why not? The process of moving to a new place with your girlfriend had you overanalyzing the simplest home utensils you needed. It was good to have that kind of freedom to choose.

Wheein just had the simpler intentions for it, though. One night, you came home to find her drinking alone at the still empty living room, lights all turned off. The lighted up fireplace was the sole reason you could see her, sitting with legs crossed and a glass in hand. A bunch of bottles, a second glass and her sketchbook, as well as her drawing materials, were all scattered around the floor.

"Whee, what are you doing...?" you asked while taking your shoes off. "I thought your group photoshoot was tomorrow," you worried about her drinking; better to not have to deal with a headache on the next day.

"I'm just having some coke. The alcohol is for you," she explained. "Can you get the ice for us?"

Not wanting to ruin the mood she set up, you used your phone flashlight to walk to the kitchen. There, you grabbed an ice bucket and emptied the silicone trays inside, shaking it a little to prevent the round cubes from sticking together.

"I would have picked it up before, but I didn't want it to melt before you arrived," Wheein said when you came back and placed the bucket on the floor.

"It's okay, babe," you assured, kissing her cheek tenderly after sitting by the fireplace with her. "Anxious because of work?"

She let out a sigh. You knew her really well.

"Getting better already, actually. It's good to have you here." Wheein smiled at you, stroking your knee with her hand. "I just needed to relax a little. Tomorrow is going to be a full day."

You nodded, reaching for a glass and the bottle of flavored vodka. Being so close to the fireplace, you reconsidered the idea of picking a drink that would burn you up even more. The current warmth was nice and it felt cozy, but it could be too much if you added more heat to it.

"Settling for the coke too? What a saint you've become," Wheein teased. A soft drink could be nice too, you thought, leaving your now full glass on the floor to look at her. She held a round ice cube between her thumb and index finger, rolling it slightly by moving both fingers in opposite directions. Well, now that brought you some thoughts back.

"This kind of... feels good," Wheein said, puppy-like eyes entertained with the water now dripping from her thumb, "it doesn't get sticky when it melts a little. And it rolls."

Right. It rolls. You pictured something like that, back at the store, wondering if it really would have this effect against her skin. Not simply dragging the ice across, but rolling it, gave a different perspective to everything. You bit your lip in excitement, now knowing your fantasy was real.

And well, why not feel this for yourself? One hand went to the bucket, but you needed both to get the ice out — it got stuck together. You appreciated the round shape inside of your mouth, rolling it around with your tongue, feeling your warmth slowly melting it. You sucked on the ice a little bit, stopping when Wheein's eyes met yours.

"You look really sexy doing this," she remarked. A side smirk allowed one of her dimples to show up, which turned into a laugh after you touched your own cheek, feeling the small ball formed by the ice. "So pretty."

You admired Wheein for a moment. Weak shadows danced around her figure, following the movement of the flames; hair recently dyed red held up in a neat bun, leaving her neck fully exposed. Around it she wore a bandeau, neatly positioned so that it didn't cover her Caddo tattoo. You found that detail particularly inviting, and added to the fact that she clearly wasn't wearing a bra...

"Why don't you try this too?" you suggested. The ice had melted already, but the cold sensation it left in your mouth, somehow, had you feeling hotter between your legs. "You'll find the temperature contrast sexier than me."

Wheein's gaze went down to your mouth, filled with desire for your humid lips.

"Can I try it from your source?"

"Please do."

Wheein really did move first. The coolness of your mouth warmed up in hers, as she simply stole that from you by chasing the kiss with all her greed. You felt like the flames from the fireplace itself had engulfed you when her legs wrapped around your waist, pulling you to the floor with her. Although when your lips parted, she was the one craving to cool it down.

"Oh my," she was able to say while gasping for air. Holding you by the back of your neck with both hands, she placed a few more quick presses against your lips before speaking again, "Hmmmm. I liked that it was... unexpected. Your mouth felt so soft from the cold."

You smiled when her fingers delicately caressed your cheek, tucking a strand of loose hair behind your ear. Wheein had her eyes on something else while doing it, though. Still holding your weight over her body with your elbows, you looked over your shoulder to discover that she eyed the ice bucket.

"Wanna try that again? With more than a kiss?" you asked, full of a smug satisfaction because the question wasn't even necessary — Wheein's pleading face spoke for itself.

_____

"Love, you really trust me a lot for this, huh," you said while tying the bandeau to the back of her head to use it as a blindfold. Depriving her from the sense of sight was part of your original fantasy, a way to allow her to have a better focus on the hot and cold feeling.

Wheein sat between your spread legs, backing herself into your lap after you moved closer to the fireplace. The orange light of the fire was now able to fully glow on her naked body. The air felt thick and hot when you breathed in, and a little sweat started building up on your back.

"I trust you more than I probably should," she whispered, leaning on your shoulder to place a few kisses along your jawline, "but you always repay it well."

"Right," you agreed, gently undoing Wheein's bun and letting the hair fall on her shoulders, making contact with your bare chest. One hand gave it a gentle tug, while you stretched the other arm to reach for the ice bucket, taking a round ice out. It quickly started wetting your palm, being just perfect for what you wanted to do. You got her hair out of the way with a harsh pull, pressing the ice against her neck. "I always make you feel so good."

Wheein's first reaction was to recoil at the sudden cold feeling, gasping loudly, but you held the ice in place with a strong grip on her neck.

"Shhhh, Wheeinie," you whispered on her ear as her gasping slowly turned into moaning, pleased with you using your palm to roll the ice against her skin, "this is just a massage. We haven't even started yet."

When it melted into a piece too small to be rolled, you simply dragged it across her chest, stopping at an already hardened nipple. The sensation of her skin under your cooled fingers felt softer than usual, the increased sensitivity having you muttering a curse against the back of her neck. Your other hand fetched for more round ice while you still held her boob, squeezing her nipple. Water dripped from your fingers and rolled down her stomach.

"More. Please," Wheein begged impatiently. Her hands were on your thighs, which were reddening from her burying her nails on them every time you did something right. You hoped to see a mark there by the end of the night.

"If you keep hurrying me up, I won't be gentle," you warned, shoving the ice against the boob you had neglected before and holding it strongly. Wheein's scream at the sudden shock ended up in a loud cry, her back arching at you circling the cube around her nipple. "Is that what you want, huh?"

"Uh-huh," she was able to shout out in agreement between her delicious moans, head now dropped backwards onto your shoulder. You moved your body to the side so you could whisper directly at her ear.

"What a slut you are."

Wheein lustfully mumbled a few yes yes yes I am when you stressed that word, like she had done many times before. She gasped in surprise when you stopped rolling the ice on her nipple, and gasped even harder when you took that same nipple in your mouth. Sucking the cold out of it. What was left of that cube you used to roll down her body, leaving behind a trail of water and stopping just before her pussy.

"Did you make a mess on the floor, Wheein...?" you asked.

You had inclined your head forward to look at the space between her legs. With all the action, Wheein had her knees up and under her chin, throbbing cunt fully exposed to the hot air. She was dripping on the floor, so much was the arousal.

"Hmmmmm, no. There's a lot of ice melting here," she lied. You smirked while thinking of how you would punish Wheein for that, one hand drowned in the bucket and getting really cold. The round cubes were now slowly turning into water altogether, coming out already humid — which meant that you didn't need to wait before using it on her.

"I would've been way nicer to you, Whee," you said, "but you don't deserve it."

Ring and middle finger squeezed her labia on each side, making the hole wider for the ice. Her reaction to the intimate contact with the cold immediately showed that she wanted you to put it in, her nails definitely leaving your thigh scratched this time. Instead, you simply stimulated her entrance, rolling and rubbing the round ice against it, even letting just a tip in. Wheein moaned sweetly, whispering your name, almost begging you to fuck her.

You took the ice into your mouth before it fully melted, wanting to taste her liquid even if the water was mixed in. Wheein grunted in annoyance from that, but there wasn't time to take her protests further — the same fingers which squeezed her open before now slid with ease inside of her, producing sweet wet sounds with each pump in. Part of you wanted to grab more ice, to roll it on her skin, to do anything, but you couldn't do much when her moans and then screams of pleasure filled your ears. Your hand was soaked with her climax in almost no time.

"Mmmmhm... Can't believe you didn't..."

You laughed when her words kept trailing off — Wheein was absolutely spent. She tiredly dropped into your arms after her orgasm, trying but failing to sound her complaints. Now any warmth was welcome, yours or from the fireplace, her hands pressing yours against her body to hug her tighter.

"What? You really wanna complain when I left you in this state?" you scoffed while gently removing the bandeau she wore as a blindfold.

Wheein sat up to face you, narrowing her eyes and pouting her mouth. She trembled a bit, still lacking the necessary balance, but kept her posture.

"I... I... Fuck." She gulped and shook her head, recollecting herself. "I just wanted you to roll the ice inside of me!"

ao3 link

[peachiimilquetea]

heyyyy :) can i get an angst scenario (fem!reader) for your event, with tenya and the prompts, "fuck you for making me love you.", "i'm sorry that i was never enough" and "i just want to understand why i wasn't enough." please?

your writing is *mwah* chef's kiss <3 thank you!!!

“𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮” + tenya iida

ft. “i’m sorry that i was never enough” + “i just want to understand why i wasn’t enough”

a/n: PLS WHY DO YALL ENJOY ANGST SM IT MAKES ME SAD WHEN I WRITE IT EVSJSBSJSSN. this one was just… damn. i hope i did the prompt justice tho! check out my event here!

contains: infidelity, tenya CURSES????, fuck mc ion like her in this one, breakup, overall just a shitty time, hakagure is a real one even after graduation

length: 1.2k

a/n ii: tysm for the kind words abt my work!! 🤍

hey iida, i hope this email finds you well given the circumstances,

i’m really really sorry…

tenya’s eyes scanned over the contents of the email and he could feel his world crumbling around him as he read. he had to remember to give hakagure something for all her troubles, as he was appreciative of all her help.

he had suspected something was going on for a few months, he wasn’t stupid. he saw the way you had started leaving your phone face down and picking up “extra shifts” at your job.

he noticed the way you smiled, how hollow it looked now when he said something to you or how you tensed up whenever he touched you, almost like an aversion to his affections.

so he pulled some strings, reached out to his old classmate from high school, now one of the top heroes that specialized in stealth in the country. he asked her to tail you on the way to one of your shifts and see what she could find. all he needed was confirmation.

i’m really really sorry…

you had decided to surprise him by coming home early from work that day. the guilt of sneaking around was eating at you and you knew he was suspecting something you made the snap decision to try to throw him off your trail.

you had decided to surprise him by coming home early from work that day. the guilt of sneaking around was eating at you and you knew he was suspecting something you made the snap decision to try to throw him off your trail.

“ten ten? baby i’m home!” you called, putting your stuff down at the door and striding into the room.

“why are you home so early?” he clipped out, initial devastation turning into anger the longer he looked at your face.

“what, i cant surprise, my boyfriend, anymore?” you attempted to joke, picking up on how tense the air was becoming.

“oh now i’m your boyfriend?” he chuckled in disbelief.

“what are you talking about? you’ve always been my boyfriend, ten, we’ve been together for like a year.”

“don’t bullshit me right now, _____. how long?”

“excuse me?” your smile started to slip, hoping he was angry about something else. anything else.

tenya turned the laptop sitting next to him around and your voice caught in your throat as you tried to answer him. high definition proof sat in front of you, a testament to how little you cared anymore. the look on his face told you everything.

he knows, you thought but used all your energy to keep your face as neutral as possible, opting to play dumb.

“how long, _____? answer me.”

you stayed silent, still trying to figure out a way out, but you knew you had reached the end of the line.

“how long have you been doing this _____?”

“s-seven months,” your voice was small. you were scared and ashamed- knowing you had been stringing him along for all this time and never seeing him react to anything like this. not when his brother was attacked or when his father died.

tenya didn’t think he could feel any worse. 7 months was more than half of the time you had been together officially, meaning you had checked out of this relationship a long time ago. you had been lying the whole time. having your cake and eating it too. it made him want to scream, cry and throw up all at the same time.

“im sorry tenya… really i am, but youve been so busy with hero work and your father left you in charge of everything, i’ve just been feeling really neglected, you know?”

“and you didn’t come to tell me about it? you went outside the home, outside of us to get your needs met?”

“it wasn’t like that-”

“then what was it like?” he pressed.

“i..”

“answer me, _____, what was it like?”

“you want the truth?” he gestured for you to go ahead, “i was bored.”

everything you said after that fell on deaf ears. you were rambling, and he wasn’t even sure if you were coming up with excuses for your own sake or for his.

you cheated because you were bored- bored of him and his unwavering love, bored of the late nights you stayed up to imagine your future, and bored of the way he treated the ground you walked on like gold. he absolutely adored you, and you got bored.

tenya’s mouth felt dry as he tried to articulate exactly what he was feeling. he wanted to go for a run and let the world blur into the background as he cleared his mind. he wanted to cry, one large cathartic release of everything that had been building up for the past few weeks. but most of all, he wanted to know why.

“you... got bored of me?”

you breathed out, exasperated, “yes, tenya, god! i needed some excitement, something different. you’re always so uptight, i just wanted to let loose sometimes, it was suffocating!”

iida flinched, the truth stinging more than he anticipated it would. he didn’t even recognize the woman that was staring at him, trying to explain away the betrayal of a lifetime.

“fuck you," he spat, even surprising himself with how hostile he was.

“tenya…”

“no. fuck you for making me love you, and fuck you for not having the integrity to break up with me when you knew you didn’t want to be here anymore.”

you deflated, feeling sick to your stomach at what you had done. initially, you hadn’t meant for it to get this far, but that didn’t matter now. “i know, i’m in the wrong and i’m sorry, but i think we can make this work and-”

he raised his hand at you to stop you. he didn’t want to listen to any more of what you had to say. he wanted you out of his house and out of his life.

he wanted to make you leave, and that’s exactly what he did, helping you pack up the things the two of you had gleefully moved in 3 months prior, and kicking you out.

he told you explicitly to never contact him again, much to your anguish. you knew you fucked up but you still wanted to be selfish, you still wanted access to him in ways that you didn’t deserve.

the rest of the day didn’t feel real. tenya went ghost, turning off his phone and sitting on the couch staring at the wall, unable to sit in the bedroom he once shared with you.

he thought about the ring he had asked his mom for, the ring he had already planned to give you, and heaved out a shaky sob. it was probably burning a hole in the nightstand drawer now, never to be used for its original purpose.

his eyes scanned the room, landing on a photo of the two of you that sat on the tv stand. getting up, he walked over to it to get a closer look. such a stark contrast from the way things were now. the two of you were all smiles in the photo, faces flushed and rosy from the cold air. he ran his thumb over the frame, finger caressing your face.

“im sorry i was never enough… i just want to understand why i was never enough.”

[autumnhobbit]

Anyway, I'm not sure if I lost the point of that last ask, but what I really meant to say is I always like people like you who advocate for minor common sense reform. Getting institutions closer to what I'd like to think if there is a God he'd hoped churches would be like. Placed for people to come together and be better, not places where abuse is ignored. You're a good person, thank you for being you, keep up your good work. I'm always grateful for people like you

The funny thing is, I really don’t consider myself a reformationist. So often you see people who have been hurt by the church, and they’re out to gut all tradition and all the things they don’t like. I’m not like that. I want the core teachings, I want the traditions that have a purpose and meaning. What I want is to clear away the nonsense and get back to the facts. Our lives are so short, I don’t see the sense in wasting time whining about facebook or twitter or what have you when there are real, spiritual evils out there; which are the source of the mundane problems. That’s what should be attacked, not the symptoms.

I love my faith. I’m not perfect at it, but I’m determined to keep trying no matter what anybody else does. But I love it because I see the small glimpses of when we manage to get it right as sanity itself. The certainty of right and wrong must be solid before anything of use can be done. And it definitely exists. But it’s not in tiny nothings like traditional femininity vs., you know, actually having a job. It’s not even in devotions, because those are optional. It’s in doctrine.

But yes, it breaks my heart to see churches unintentionally hurting people. Sometimes it’s unavoidable. Because sometimes the hurting person is on a track where the church cannot come off to meet them without making things worse. The Church cannot be swayed by emotions or by loss from doing what’s right, and I think that’s a major problem now, too. Since the 90’s and the early 2000’s (and probably since Vatican II), the church has been obsessed with trying to keep people interested, and that’s caused them to lose more than they would have. Because they can’t go chasing after the stranger who doesn’t care without neglecting the parishoner who does, sometimes fatally. I don’t think it’s the church’s job to fix everything for everyone. I do think it’s its place to showcase the truth—especially the unpopular ones—to show kindness and physical charity to all, and to serve God above all other pursuits.

Anyway, thank you. I’m grateful to hear you say something like that. 🖤

[randomthingsthatilike1]

Okay, but Eliza neglected Alex. Did she mean to? No. Was she trying to hurt her? No. Is that still child abuse? God yes. Alex could never be good enough, could never do anything right. Alex flat out said that Eliza blamed her for Kara not dating enough. What kind of bullshit is that?? I'm not saying that Eliza is a bad person, but she put way too much on Alex's shoulders at way too young an age. She neglected her and emotionally abused her, whether or not she meant to.

wait i dont even remember, when did eliza say something to alex about kara dating? and like. for all intents and purposes, kara was v much a special needs child and eliza is a single parent, and alex is her older sister--and i think this post describes it p well. This isn’t katherine grant, who’s just straight out mean to cat and won’t even give her a hug. this is a woman dealing with a kid who, if not handled correctly, could very easily kill them if she loses control of her powers--and we all know how cruel children and teenagers can be. Eliza can’t be everywhere, and she’s doing it all on her own--so yeah, she over relies on Alex because it’s not even just ‘your sister needs you to function’ it’s ‘your sister needs you to make sure she doesnt accidentally kill anyone.’ There’s been a lot of talk about kara having SPD, if u want it i can try and dig it up--that was from last season.

and i’m not a sibling to someone with special needs, i can’t talk about that experience but i’ve definitely heard stories from people i know about being given a lot more responsibilities and dedicating a lot more of their time to helping their siblings than maybe joining that extracurricular or going abroad or going to a school even 10 minutes further away

and yeah, eliza talks about being less harsh on kara, because really kara just lost everyone, and then was dumped on the danvers really by her only remaining relative. eliza says it like she’s a girl from another planet who just lost everything--who can also very easily leave and never come back if she wanted, or felt like she was trapped.

and instantly when finding out that this is how alex feels she apologizes, adjusting her behavior once she found out how alex was feeling, and we see that not just in the thanksgiving episode but when alex and j’onn visit midvale and in the next thanksgiving episode. and alex not doing anything right part--alex could do something right. eliza told winn how proud she was of alex for working in the same field as her

and also like. we all know just how much alex bottles up her feelings. the fact that eliza doesnt question alex’s feelings or make her second guess anything and yes changes both her behavior towards both alex and kara makes me think that this is a pretty new conversation topic, at least since jeremiah died. because anyone who’s an older sibling will say, it’s an adjustment to having a younger sibling, especially one who’s an alien refugee. And Clark literally just dropped kara off on their doorstep, it’s not like they had much time to prepare.

that’s not saying eliza didn’t make mistakes. but one child needed help with everything and eliza was just one person, and also grieving for her husband and constantly looking over her shoulder to see when the next person in a suit would show up, because the only reason why they left kara alone was because jeremiah was working for them--and he’s not anymore. this isn’t a simple case of ‘oh i have 2 children and one of them i like better’

also there has been some research into what siblings of children with special needs experience that are almost universal, and a documentary filmmaker named Rachel Feighter interviewed a bunch of siblings in a documentary “Not Typical” some common experiences she found were

“Feeling like they need to be perfect. Siblings of individuals with special needs know how hard their parents work to ensure all of their sibling’s needs are met, and often see their parents struggle to meet these needs. Many feel like they can’t make mistakes because that would add to their parents’ burden, so they believe they must be perfect at all times. This is an impossible standard to meet, and can lead to stress and feelings of inadequacy. One girl said she felt like she “had to be Ms. Perfect and not have any problems for [her] parents to deal with.” Another said that she felt as though she could never be “enough.”

Feeling like they can’t express their feelings. Most typically developing children love their sibling with special needs. Yet they may also resent how much of their parents’ time is taken up by caring for their sibling or feel embarrassed about their sibling’s behavior. One girl said she “was never allowed to mourn openly or to be mad or sad about [her] brother” and another said her friends thought she was being mean if she said anything bad about her sister, even though friends with typically developing siblings often complain.

Having a different idea of family and home. For most children the concept of family is based in togetherness. But when a sibling has special needs, family quality time may look different. One girl recalled that her mother was “assigned” to her sister with special needs and her father was “assigned” to her. The family often spent time apart, especially when it involved leaving the house.

Feeling as though their problems are minimized. Sometimes a sibling with special needs has complex and even life-threatening problems. An issue faced by a typically developing sibling, whether it is a problem with a friend or an academic struggle, may seem small compared to having limited mobility, learning difficulties or sensory issues that require intensive care or prevent a child from attending the neighborhood school. One girl said her parents rarely dealt with her problems, instead telling her to be “strong.” 

Feeling isolated. Typically developing siblings may be lonely because they don’t have peers who have siblings with special needs. So they feel different when their friends ask “what’s wrong with your sister?” Some children also feel self-conscious about their sibling with special needs, and aren’t sure when or how to tell their friends about him.

Dealing with intolerance early and often. Children learn early that there is not universal acceptance for individuals with special needs, and that their sibling is not welcome everywhere that typically developing children are. This can be deeply disappointing to typically developing children who want to have shared experiences with their sibling. They regularly encounter individuals who refuse to move from seats designated for individuals with disabilities, and those who make unkind comments about other accommodations their sister needs. These early lessons in intolerance, and even hate, can affect their world view and make them cynical or resentful of the limitations placed on their sibling and themselves as a result.

Feeling like they are asked to help too much. Some typically developing children are expected to help care for their sibling with special needs from a young age, even if that sibling is older. One girl said that she felt like the “attention police” at home since her mother was constantly telling her that she had to pay attention to her sibling with special needs. Many are told early on that they will be expected to care for their sibling when their parents are no longer able to do so. This puts enormous pressure on them.

Feeling like they must grow up quickly. Because of the sum of their experiences, from feeling as though they are on their own to handle their problems to feeling pressure to be perfect to being given responsibility for their brother or sister, some siblings of children with special needs feel as though they are forced to grow up too quickly.”

Most typically developing children love their siblings with special needs beyond measure and are close to them. But to better understand and support them, it’s important to acknowledge their struggles. There is a need for more information about the experience of growing up with a sibling with special needs. While there are a few places the stories of these siblings are told, such as the fictional book “Wonder” by R.J. Palacio, hearing from the siblings themselves in “Not Typical” will help many feel less alone and better understood.

i know that was long, but tell me--does that sound like alex danvers to you? These are not quite universal experiences but apparently pretty damn common. And this is all as a newly single mother, taking care of a deeply traumatized alien. Considering how quickly Eliza changed her behavior once she found out how Alex truly felt, I genuinely think that Eliza didn’t realize how hurt Alex was feeling.

[the-cryptographer]

For the meme~! I'm kind of curious about Mokuba if you feel like you have enough to draw on, but I know you've said you're not totally sure how to write him, so I understand if that's a tough one to answer. xD So otherwise, Jou. :3

:D I already wrote out a meme response for Jou but, even ifI hadn’t, I’d want to fill it out for Mokuba.Yeah, I do find Mokuba kind oftough to write. Maybe it’s because he’s so young, and so it’s hard to tellwhich of his characteristics will develop or fade with age. But, just readingother people’s works and all sorts of different interpretations of Mokuba, he’snot a character I’ve ever strongly felt was OOC. And, thinking over it, I’veessentially written three different versions of him in three different fics,jfc. I decided to be most indulgent towards warping (older) Mokuba’spersonality to suit my whims in my longest planned fic – which is simultaneouslynerve-wracking bc it’s a personality that people are probably more likely toreject, but it also puts me at ease bc I can basically write him in the waythat’s easiest and most natural for me. But, yeah~ I love the snarky, vile bratthat he can be in the manga best, and often play up those qualities. But aMokuba that isn’t a good egg is also not Mokuba.

MOKUBA

1) He is a good egg! Truly. He’s nice. He’s not like Seto.He has a friendly demeanour, and a natural concern for other people, and he doesnot like to see them hurt. Like, sure, he’s willing to hurt other people verypurposefully – there’s his early manga arc, and then threatening Diva in DSoD

 - The rest of these are things that aren’t critical factors or definite characteristics, so much as axes and continuums Ilike to consider Mokuba’s place on while writing him. How much of any of these things I ultimately decide to make him is in constant flux.

2) Is he spoiled? Probably, to some extent, yes~ I think Seto remembersthe fear of losing the very fiscal means to provide for himself and his brother.Gouzaburou also took pains to make Seto hyperaware that the price of thecomforts he provided was endless studies and labour, the everpresent threat of violenceand corporate takeover, and the ability to sleep at night, or at all. But Mokubawas more or less forgotten. Mokuba was bored and lonely and neglected, but I’msure the maids provided him with everything he needed. I’m sure his allowance coveredanything he ever wanted to buy. And I think once Seto took over hisguardianship at age 15/16, he didn’t mind just throwing money at whatever itwas Mokuba could articulate wanting (ie. everything except Seto’s affection andSeto being proud of him) And I don’t think Mokuba’s particularly greedy but, bymy understanding Mokuba was five years old when he left the orphanage – I don’tthink he remembers a time when the status quo as described above wasn’t… thestatus quo. Consider spoiled brat Mokuba. Consider it.

3) How intelligent is he, and what kind of intelligence is it? He’s pretty intelligent, by myunderstanding. A quick learner. And very resourceful. Extremely!! The animemade him capable of doing some emergency piloting on a plane that was about tocrash, which is kind of hilariously overboard, but- I think you can seeelements of that in Mokuba during more subdued moments. He’s good at quickly accessingsituations, knowing who to appeal to for aid (usually Isono or the gang), makingplans, and carrying them out. And carrying them out with a very clever flair atthat. I think you see this when things go to hell with Seto in the LegendaryHeroes game in the anime. You can just read it as Mokuba going crying to Yuugifor help. But nah~ That was too smart a move to ignore. Mokuba went to thepeople he knew were both willing and capable to help, to the people he knewwouldn’t be dismissive of him and his feelings, and he knew exactly what to sayto them to get them on-board with following him back to a location that he’dalready picked out as a good place to access the Legendary Heroes VR. And youcan see this with Duellist Kingdom too. You remember Mokuba manages to escape andpursue Yuugi after being kidnapped by Pegasus and the Big Five (although theyrecapture him and Pegasus takes his soul afterwards). And in the manga you getthis-

How many eleven year olds manage to outwit groups of adult businessmen bursting into their house to steal important business documents?

I think the only reason Mokuba does not appear completelygenius is because he’s standing next to Seto most of the time. And Seto’s bothmore ambitious and more classically idiot savant. I’m sure there are areaswhere Seto’s intelligence just completely flies over Mokuba’s head. Mokuba can’teven watch Seto working on the computer or playing chess or coming up withproduct blueprints without feeling confused. And I think he tends to feel alittle self-conscious about that – wanting to be Seto’s equal but constantly underperformingin the areas that Seto excels (and thus choses to fight most of his battles in).But I think, as a rounded individual, Mokuba might even be smarter than Seto. AndI think he’s definitely smarter in the area of managing people and assets.

4) How emotional or cerebral is he? I think this is another way that Mokubaseems confusing placed next to Seto. Mokuba’s certainly more emotionallyattuned to other people than Seto, and more willing to account for people’sfeelings in his course of action. But… do you see how that’s actually a verycerebral trait? People are going to have feelings and react emotionally tothings, whether you want them to or not. Isn’t it only good logic to account forthat in your plans? I think they’re both very cerebral, really. But, at the endof the day, a lot of Seto’s actions are fueled very deeply by his emotions –although usually he has some bullshit excuse for why this is completely logical SHUT UP. Comparatively, I think Mokubais very good at acting calmly and practically without regard for his immediate feelings. Remember that he’sa good egg, so he doesn’t actually like seeing people hurt. In fact, on anemotional level it might discomfort him highly, but he’s got a job to do and anii-sama to win over so shut up and play this stupid torture game with him.

5) How mature is he? I honestly don’t have even a guess on thisone. In some ways Mokuba seems very mature to me, and in some ways he seemslike a kid. Precocious and late bloomer all at once. I enjoy seeing people playaround with this dichotomy in fic though. I imagine, like his brother though, hetends to overestimate himself in this regard. He’s seen things most childrenhis age have not, and he sees how it’s changed him. So obviously he’s verymature, he thinks.

Here, have a fic excerpt:

“I’m sure Nii-sama is okay,” [Mokuba] lied. “He was just feeling a bit tiredafter… after last night is all. Anyhow, he wouldn’t let a bunch of robots getto him. I’m sure he already has a plan to get us out of this.”

Jounouchi snorted. He’d never liked reminders that Mokuba was not exactlyprone to childish indulgence, the way other kids his age were. “Wouldn’t counton it,” he grumbled.

“Well, I wouldn’t expect you to know, idiot,” Mokuba snapped.

This is from Mokuba’s POV and it just cracks me up. Anzu andJounouchi just teamed up to ask how Mokuba was and if he was worried about hisbrother. What Mokuba means when he says he’s not prone to childish indulgence,is that he provides an answer that cuts off attempts for them to coddle andcomfort him, like somebody probably should coddle or comfort a kid in adangerous situation separated from his family.But the idea that that is theprimary thing Jounouchi is responding to is laughable. Almost certainlyJounouchi thinks Mokuba is incredibly immature for holding his brother in suchreverence that he pretends his brother’s okay when everyone in the room knowshe’s not. And for trusting his brother so much, even Seto has already betrayedand hurt him in the past. And, taking it to level deeper, Jounouchi probablydoesn’t care how mature or immature Mokuba is, as much as he’s annoyed by thefact that he’s worried about Kaibatoo, in the full cognisance of the fact that Kaiba’s a jerk who wouldn’t worryabout him in return.So, yeah, Mokuba’s the only one worried about how mature or immature heappears, and the idea that he would project this onto Jounouchi, all whilethinking about how mature he is for not saying he’s worried and upset when he’sobviously worried and upset – it’s just fuckin’ hilarious to me. Excuse melaughing at my own writing~But it’s a very concrete example of what I’m thinking about when I try to writeMokuba ;)

  Send me a character and I’ll pick out essential characteristics for them that I try to keep in mind while writing them~