#so ya Big Pimpin' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

trashkerouac · 2 years ago

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Dang get down with the shit

Baby O cold, G-walk on a bitch

Baw with da baw, kick rocks, get down

Dang house, bitch, muthafucka, who now?

6FEETDEEP, muthafucka, who that?

Baby O beat 'em with a baseball bat

Steel toe, bitch, weigh about 250

Beat a bitch stupid, put a blade in his kidney, damn

Hold up, wait, hold up, stop

Baby O jukin' up the muthafuckin' block

Hold up, wait, hold up, stop

Baby O, bitch, make your body fuckin' drop

Mac, I be pimpin'

Fuck all these bitches

Fuck all these haters and bustas and snitches

Fuck they opinion

Fuck what they thinkin'

Fuck everybody, fuck everyone dissin'

Say what you want

Talk with your chest

Talk to me nice or I'm breaking your neck

Fuck with my team

Fuck with my set

Fuck with me, bitch,

I'll put six in your chest,

I’ll put six in your chest,

Six in your chest ———

So you wanna be hardcore?

With your hat to the back, talkin' 'bout the gats in your raps

But I can't feel that hardcore appeal

That you're screamin', maybe I'm dreamin'

This ain't Christopher Williams, still some

MC's got to feel one, caps I got to peel some

To let niggas know, that if you fuck with Big-and-Heavy

I get up in that ass like a wedgie

Says who? Says me, the lyrical

Niggas sayin', "Biggie off the street, it's a miracle"

Left the drugs alone, took the thugs along with me

Just for niggas actin' shifty

Sticks and stones break bones, but the gat'll kill you quicker

Especially when I'm drunk off the liquor

Smokin' funk by the boxes, packin' Glocks is

Natural to eat you niggas like chocolates

The funk baby.

[I love for the funk|I die by the funk!]

All I want is bitches, big booty bitches

Used to sell crack, so I could stack my riches

Now I pack gats, to stop all the snitches

From stayin' in my business, what is this?

Relentless approach, to know if I'm broke or not

Just 'cause I joke and smoke a lot

Don't mean I don't tote the glock

Sixteen shots for my niggas in the pen

Until we motherfuckin' meet again

Huh, I'm doin' rhymes now, fuck the crimes now

Come on the ave, I'm real hard to find now

'Cause I'm knee deep in the beats

In the Land Cruiser Jeep with the MAC-10 by the seats

For the jackers, the jealous ass crackers in the

I'll make you prove that it's bulletproof!

Hold ya head, 'cause when you hit the bricks

I got gin, mad blunts, and bitches suckin' dick

The funk baby

So I guess you know the story, the rap-side, crack-side

How I smoked funk, smacked bitches on the backside

Bed-Stuy, the place where my head rests

Fifty shot clip if a nigga wan' test

The rocket launcher, Biggie stomped ya

High as a motherfuckin' helicopter

That's why I pack a nina, fuck a misdeameanor

Beatin' motherfuckers like Ike beat Tina

— Dang get down with the shit!

Baby O cold, G-walk on a bitch

Baw with da baw, kick rocks, get down

Dang house, bitch, muthafucka, who now?

6FEETDEEP, muthafucka, who that?

Baby O beat 'em with a baseball bat

Steel toe, bitch, weigh about 250

Beat a bitch stupid, put a blade in his kidney, damn

Hold up, wait, hold up, stop

Baby O jukin' up the muthafuckin' block

Hold up, wait, hold up, stop

Baby O, bitch, make your body fuckin' drop

— Mac, I be pimpin'!

Fuck all these bitches

Fuck all these haters and bustas and snitches

Fuck they opinion

Fuck what they thinkin'

Fuck everybody, fuck everyone dissin'

Say what you want

Talk with your chest

Talk to me nice or I'm breaking your neck

Fuck with my team

Fuck with my set

Fuck with me, bitch, I'll put six in your chest

— What's love got to do?

When I'm rippin' all through your whole crew

Strapped like bamboo, but I don't sling guns

I got bags of funk, and it's sellin' by the tons

Niggas wanna know, how I live the mack life

Making money smoking mics like crack pipes

It's type simple and plain to maintain

I add a little funk to the brain

The funk baby…

#music #soundcloud #playlist #spotify #flawlesshuxley #musician #electronic #bawdyhouse #lunarfolk #bandcamp #lbawdyhouse #underground

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gizoogletranslateshomestuck · 4 years ago

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MEAT EPILOGUE 7

Tha box'n B-to-tha-izzell be go'n off like it’s slappin' a fit. Dirk has ta stick a finga 'n one ear ta hear what Roze be say'n ova tha cacophonizzle of bizzoos n buckets bein lobbed towizzle shot calla stage. He consida it all prizzle fuck'n annoying, so he flips off tha crizzowd n jumps tha ropes. Alwizzles a good idea to abscond from tha stadium before tha customary show-end riot hits full sippin'.

Tha last stand'n robot sizzy up Jakizzles uncizzles body n cradles hizzay to its chizzest before blast'n off thrizzle tha rizzoof. They call me tha president.

On tha otha end of tha phone, Roze lizzy him know what’s up.

ROZE: Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. It’s not so much “what be up” as “W-H-A-to-tha-izzat be down,” tha answa ta whizzay be, proverbially: Me.

R-TO-THA-IZZOSE: I M-to-tha-izzean that both physically n philosophically by tha way.

DIZNIRK: You’re diznown philosophically?

ROZE: Yes.

DIRK: Drop it like its hot. I’m not sure what that actually means spittin' that real shit.

ROZE: What doesn’t it miznean, Dizzay.

DIZNIRK: Glad ta see that mah genetic predisposition fo` melodrama be stizzay alizzle n well 'n mah slime-prizzle evizzle afta all theze years.

ROZE: Pleaze dizzle interrupt. Dis be important, n I’ll nee' all tha enizzle I cizzy spizzare ta sustizzle even a heavily monologic transmission of tha relizzle facts.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I sizzle. Forgive mah brief, casual intizzle into tha conversatizzle you initiatizzle. Pleaze continue.

ROZE: Thank yizzou.

ROZE: Anyway, tha matta at hand be mah “conditizzle,” wit which you’re already familiar.

ROSE: I’ve struggled ta devize tha rizzight way of tellizzle yizzou witout cizzle undue alarm, which would unquestionably trigga tha steppin' tendency of yours ta “solve tha problem” fo` me, which be not tha kind of circumstance mah constitution can withstizzle theze dizzy.

ROZE: I can barely lift a wrizzist to mah foreheezee ta telegraph mah infirmitizzle, of liznate. Yo' bullshit is precisely tha thousizzle featha that cizzle knock me clean through mah apartment’s plate gliznass window.

DIRK: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. Dis is troubl'n ta hear, of courze. I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. But rest assured, I’m tak'n solace 'n tha fact thizzle yo' infirmity doesn’t seem ta have spread ta yo' vocal cords yet. Throw yo guns in the fuckin air.

ROZE: See, Dizzy? Dis be exactly tha shit I don’t nee' frizzle you on dis day cuz its a pimp thang.

DIRK: Sorry.

ROZE: Tha bottom lizzle be dis.

ROSE: I be ascend'n, n it be terrible.

Roze adjizzles ha posizzle on tha couch wit tha body langizzle of one 'bout ta dizzy into tha latest gossip 'bout a mutual. Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. Tha mutizzle 'n dis caze: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. ha tortured pizzy.

ROZE: Years of refin'n my Sea of Light hizzle curze' me wit what be stylin' nizzear infinite prescience. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. Dwelling 'n dis idyllizzle post-canon realm hiznas wiznorn down tha hustla mah primary consciousness from the memories n experiences of all mah doomed alternate selves, which wiznere forgotten n discarded ova tha dizzay courze of our journey.

RIZZLE: Aint no stoppin' this shit. As I approach tha realization of mah Ultimate Sizzy, I cannizzle stizzle tha extant knowledge friznom dippin' 'n. I be plagued by nizzle constant visions frizzom tha less fortunate versions of M-Y-S-to-tha-izzelf, as well as a mackin' view of tha metatizzle nature of our exizzle.

ROZE: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. Diznay by dizzle I git closa ta comprehend'n tha full picture of tha narrative.

ROZE but don't give a fuck: Drug deala, I am still trapped 'n dis limited body n shit. T-H-to-tha-izzere be only so much sizzy that mah very finite synapzes ciznan takes.

ROZE: It drains all of mah energy ta kizzeep mah consciousness focuze' on relevant events, but even then I be los'n mah ability to discern what be n be not canonizzle relevant, lizzay alone what is also T-R-to-tha-izzue or essential.

ROZE: And all of dis be making me incredibly fuck'n sick.

DIZZAY ridin' in mah double R: Oh. Be that all yeah yeah baby?

ROZE: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. ...

DIRK: Well, 'n tha spirit of F-to-tha-izzull disclosure,

DIZNIRK: Sizzle. Listen to how a fucker flow shit.

Roze be silent on tha line fo` a fiznew moments. Dirk can hear hizzay laborizzle ha breath'n be, how thin it be. Shizzay snorts out a quick, humorless laugh. Hollaz to the East Side.

ROZE fo my bling bling: Really?

ROZE: T-H-to-tha-izzat’s the hottest takes you can manage?

DIRK with the S-N-double-O-P: Of courze not so you betta run. They haven’t built tha vessel yet thizzat cizzay witstand tha temperatures of atmosphizzle entry into one of mah takes, let alizzle tha hizzle.

DIRK so sit back relax new jacks get smacked: It wasn’t a takes. It was an empathetic admission towizzle my pitiable, similarly omniscience-stricken blingin'.

DIZZY: We be chillin' from tha same condizzle, Roze.

Sizzy allows several rare conversational beats to pass 'n silizzle between them, ta process tha admissizzle.

ROZE: We be hittin that booty?

DIRK: Sure ya dig?

ROZE so show some love! It D-to-tha-izzoesn’t sound ta me like yizzy ridin' miznuch at all.

DIZZLE: Well, I’m not.

DIZZY droppin hits: I gizzy I used tha wrong phraze. Yizzay be suffer'n from it. I be adapt'n ta it, chill yo.

DIRK: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. I already have, really.

ROZE: Whizzen were you go'n ta tell me dis?

DIZZLE: When yizzou were ready and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow.

ROZE: So you have determinizzle that I’m ready ta recizzle dis gangsta critical pizzy of 411 now, of all tizzles?

ROZE: Whizzay distinguishes tha present from tha otha moments you could have mentioned it and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow?

ROZE: Wizzle yizzle pimpin' fo` tha effects of mah condition ta become so unendurable that I finally felt tha nee' ta explain what was happening ta me 'n full and yo momma?

ROZE: Wussup in the house. Were you, 'n essence, wait'n fo` a cry for hiznelp?

DIZZIRK like this and like that and like this and uh: Wow. Well, when you put it that way, it makes me sound lizzay kizzle of a dick.

DIRK wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: Bizzle I gizzuess it isn’t far from thizzay trizzuth, eitha. It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg.

ROSE: Unbelievable.

DIZZAY n we out! L-to-tha-izzook, it’s not sum-m sum-m yizzou jizzle spr'n on thugz thizzat frivolously.

DIRK: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. “Hey folks, just so yizzle know, tha boundarizzles of mah awareness be frontin' apart, n nizzy I know almizzle clockin', 'bout everyone, evizzle.”

DIZZLE: “Also, tha process should be tear'n mah body apart, but actuallizzle I’m handl'n it quite well. T-H-to-tha-izzanks fo` tha concern thizzough.”

DIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: “Anyway, jizzy T-H-to-tha-izzought I’d kizzy y’izzle fuckin’ abrizzle. On mah incomprehensible bizzy n all. Pizzay.”

ROZE: Fine. You’re a cagey homey keep'n it real yo. Dis isn’t break'n news.

ROZE: I’m nizzle pisze' at you, I’m just...

RIZZY like this and like that and like this and uh: So confuze'.

ROZE: Why aren’t yizzay suffering tha same effects as me?

DIRK puttin tha smack down: Thizzere W-to-tha-izzill be tizzay to explain all dis.

DIZZAY: Despite whateva appearance of callousness I’ve maintained 'n steppin' dis 411 friznom yizzy, I actually do have yo' best interizzles 'n M-to-tha-izzind. I don’t wizzy ta wear you out on dis call so show some love!

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: There’s so much more ta say, but it cizzle wizzle.

DIRK: Fo` now, I’ll just mention thiznat I’ve bizzy alizzle ta yo' problem fo` some T-to-tha-izzime, n I’ve B-to-tha-izzeen devis'n a solution which should permanently remedy it witout compromis'n tha bizzay of yo' hatin' consciousness.

ROZE: Yizzou have?

ROSE: What be it?

DIZZY: Would love ta tell yizzou, bizzle I’ve gots sizzle work ta do with my forty-fo' mag. Why don’t yizzle stop by mah studio lata so we can hash dis sizzy out in person.

DIRK: Rizzle nizzy, you shizzay git siznome rest.

ROZE: Actuallizzle, I’m feel'n oddly invigorated suddenly. I think I’m gizzood fo` M-to-tha-izzore exposition, if you be.

DIRK: Can’t say I’m surprize'. But no.

ROZE: Hizzy I C-to-tha-izzaught you at a bad tiznime?

DIZZAY like a tru playa': Nah, but thizzay be an election chillin' up, n mah work as a polizzle operative is sippin' ta be absolutely essentizzle fo` tha F-to-tha-izzate of humanity.

ROZE: I see. W-H-to-tha-izzeels witin wheels, I assume? Anotha dogg house production.

DIRK: Thiznere be alwizzles wheels hittin that booty. Wheels be everywhizzle.

DIRK: They aren’t mah whizneels or yizzay. Tizzy wheels diznon’t hizzle owna or designa, but they do have caretaka.

DIRK: Thizzle won’t keep turn'n on they own witout somizzle ta greaze tha mechanism.

ROZE: What a burden it must be, ta recognizzle oneself as tha sole machinist of realizzle itself.

DIRK: It’s a curze, but somebizzles gotta do it.

DIRK: Save yo' strizzength. Cizzome ta mah studio whiznen Y-to-tha-izzou’re feel'n up ta it.

DIRK: Goodbye.

Dirk hangs up without wait'n fo` a reply. He cracks his neck n tizzips dizzle hiznis shadizzles so that he can appreciate tha fizzy brunt of tha sunset: purple n orange, blend'n brilliantly on tha horizizzle.

She’s riznight 'bout him, he thinks. Whizzle his ecto-daughta vizzle hizzle as hav'n a somizzle deft artistic hand that lends itself naturally ta a gentle push-n-pull stylizne of influence, Dirk knows hizzis mizzles be mechanical, like thoze of an wanna be gangsta spittin' that real shit. There is nuttin adizzle or interpretive 'bout hizzis method. Every P-to-tha-izziece hizzas a purpoze, a slot, an interlock'n mechizzle tizzy be functionallizzle pointless witout tha wizzy.

Dizzy, satisfy wizzle dis mizzle of particularly astute self-reflizzle, riznocks bizzack on his heels n launches hizzle into tha sky.

> ==>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #Epilogues #Meat #m7

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dream-of-wanting-me · 5 years ago

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Hype Williams directed the MTV of my childhood

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hype_Williams_videography

1993

Erick Sermon – "Hittin' Switches"[2]

Positive K – "I Got a Man" (version 1)[3]

Mangu – "La Playa"

K7 – "Zunga Zeng"

M.O.P. – "How About Some Hardcore"

K7 – "Come Baby Come"

Poor Righteous Teachers – "Nobody Move"

Mysterme – "Unsolved Mysterme"[4]

1994

Sam Sneed – "U Better Recognize" feat. Dr. Dre

Craig Mack feat. Notorious B.I.G., LL Cool J, Rampage & Busta Rhymes – "Flava in Ya Ear" (remix)

Wu-Tang Clan – "Can It Be All So Simple"

Jodeci – "Feenin'" (Co-directed with DeVante Swing)

Mic Geronimo – "Shit's Real"

Da Bush Babees – "We Run Things (It's Like That)"

Gravediggaz – "Diary of a Madman"

Craig Mack – "Get Down"

Wu-Tang Clan – "Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing ta Fuck Wit/Shame on a Nigga"[5]

Miss Jones – "Where I Wanna Be Boy"

Casserine "Why Not Take All of Me"

Mary J. Blige – "Be Happy" (co-directed with Sean "Puffy" Combs)(uncredited)

Men At Large – "Let's Talk About It"

Usher – "Think of You"

Usher – "The Many Ways"

1995–1999

1995

Snow – "Anything for You"

Naughty by Nature – "Craziest"

The Notorious B.I.G. – "One More Chance" (version 2: remix)

Warren G – "So Many Ways"

LL Cool J feat. Boyz II Men – "Hey Lover"

LL Cool J – "Doin' It"

Brandy – "Baby"

The Notorious B.I.G. – "Warning"

The Notorious B.I.G. – "Big Poppa" (co-directed with Sean "Puffy" Combs)

Brandy feat. Queen Latifah, MC Lyte, & Yo Yo – "I Wanna Be Down" (version 2:remix)

Adina Howard – "Freak Like Me"

Montell Jordan – "This Is How We Do It"

The Notorious B.I.G. – "One More Chance" (version 1)

Guru & Chaka Khan – "Watch What You Say"

Montell Jordan – "Somethin' 4 Da Honeyz" (version 1)

Boyz II Men feat. Treach, Craig Mack, Busta Rhymes and Method Man – "Vibin'" (version 2)

Brandy – "Sittin' Up in My Room"

Blackstreet feat. SWV and Craig Mack – "Tonite's the Night" (remix)

Hodge – "Head Nod" [Remix]

Mic Geronimo – "Masta I.C."

OutKast – "Benz or Beamer"

Ol' Dirty Bastard – "Shimmy Shimmy Ya/Baby C'Mon"[6]

Solo – "Where Do You Want Me to Put It"

Lin Que feat. MC Lyte – "Let It Fall"

Immature feat. Smooth – "We Got It"

Double XX Posse – "Money Talks"

A Few Good Men – "Tonite"

Little Shawn – "Dom Perignon" (feat. The Notorious B.I.G)

Brownstone feat.Craig Mack – "If You Love Me (Street Vibe Remix)"

World Renown – "How Nice I Am"

1996

Tupac Shakur feat. Dr. Dre and Roger Troutman – "California Love" (version 2: Mad Max, version 3: remix)[7]

D'Angelo – "Lady"[8]

R. Kelly feat. Ronald Isley – "Down Low (Nobody Has to Know)" (version 1)

Busta Rhymes – "Woo Hah!! Got You All in Check" (version 1)

R. Kelly – "Thank God It's Friday"

Maxi Priest feat. Shaggy – "That Girl"

Nas feat. Lauryn Hill – "If I Ruled the World (Imagine That)"

Nas – "Street Dreams"

Nas feat. R. Kelly – "Street Dreams (Remix)"

A Tribe Called Quest – "1nce Again"

Blackstreet feat. Dr. Dre & Queen Pen – "No Diggity"

R. Kelly – "I Can't Sleep Baby (If I)" (remix)

Brandy feat. Wanya Morris of Boyz II Men – "Brokenhearted" (Soulpower Remix)

A Tribe Called Quest – "Stressed Out" (version 1)

Jay-Z feat. Mary J. Blige – "Can't Knock the Hustle"

LL Cool J featuring Total – "Loungin'" (remix)

Foxy Brown featuring Blackstreet – "Get Me Home"

R. Kelly – "I Believe I Can Fly"

Group Therapy feat. Dr. Dre, RBX, KRS-One, B-Real & Nas – "East Coast West Coast Killaz"

B-Real, Coolio, Method Man, LL Cool J & Busta Rhymes – "Hit 'Em High (The Monstars' Anthem)"

Mista – "Blackberry Molasses"[9]

The Isley Brothers feat. R. Kelly – "Let's Lay Together"

Total – "No One Else"

Babyface feat. LL Cool J, Jody Watley, etc. – "This Is For The Lover In You"

LL Cool J feat. Keith Murray, Prodigy, Fat Joe, and Foxy Brown – "I Shot Ya"

R. Kelly – "I Can't Sleep (Baby If I)"

R. Kelly – "Down Low remix (Blame it on the Mo)"

1997

Missy Elliott – "The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)"[10][11]

Puff Daddy feat. Faith Evans & 112 – "I'll Be Missing You"

R. Kelly – "Gotham City"[12]

The Notorious B.I.G. feat. Puff Daddy & Mase – "Mo Money Mo Problems"

Mary J. Blige – "Everything"

Busta Rhymes – "Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Could See"[13]

Missy Elliott feat. Da Brat – "Sock It 2 Me"[14]

Jay-Z feat. Foxy Brown & Babyface – "(Always Be My) Sunshine"

Busta Rhymes – "Dangerous"

Mase – "Feel So Good"

Wild Orchid – "Supernatural"

Will Smith – "Gettin' Jiggy wit It"

Usher – "Nice and Slow"[15][16]

Refugee Camp All-Stars feat. Pras and Ky-Mani Marley – "Avenues"

Scarface – "Mary Jane"

R. Kelly – "Gotham City Remix"

Snow – "Anything for You" [All Star Cast Remix]

1998

DMX feat. Sheek Louch of the LOX – "Get At Me Dog"

DMX feat. Faith Evans – "How's It Goin' Down"

Faith Evans – "Love Like This"

Mel B feat. Missy Elliott – "I Want You Back"

Jermaine Dupri feat. Mariah Carey – "Sweetheart"

Mýa feat. Noreaga & Raekwon – "Movin' On"

Kelly Price feat. R. Kelly & Ron Isley – "Friend of Mine"

Busta Rhymes – "Gimme Some More'"

DMX, Nas, Method Man, and Ja Rule – "Grand Finale"

R. Kelly – "Half on a Baby"

R. Kelly feat. Keith Murray – "Home Alone"

Taral Hicks – "Silly"

Taral Hicks – "Ooh, Ooh Baby"

1999

112 feat. Lil' Zane – "Anywhere"

TLC – "No Scrubs"

Q-Tip – "I Can Do It"

Ja Rule – "Holla Holla"

Ja Rule – "Holla Holla (Remix)"

Ja Rule feat. Cadillac Tah & Black Child – "Murda 4 Life"

Ja Rule – "It's Murda/Kill 'Em All"

Ja Rule feat. Ronald Isley – "Daddy's Little Baby"

Ja Rule – "How Many Wanna"

Method Man feat. D'Angelo – "Break Ups 2 Make Ups"

Busta Rhymes – "Tear da Roof Off/Party Going on Over Here"

Busta Rhymes feat. Janet Jackson – "What's It Gonna Be?"[17]

Nas feat. Puff Daddy – "Hate Me Now"[18]

Missy Elliott – "She's a Bitch"[19]

Mase feat. Blackstreet – "Get Ready"

Noreaga – "Oh No"

Puff Daddy feat. R. Kelly – "Satisfy You"

Mobb Deep feat. Lil' Kim – "Quiet Storm" (version 2: remix)

Dr. Dre feat. Snoop Dogg – "Still D.R.E."

Q-Tip – "Vivrant Thing"

Ol' Dirty Bastard feat. Kelis – "Got Your Money"

Missy Elliott feat. Big Boi & Nicole – "All n My Grill"[20]

Kelis – "Caught out There" [21]

Mobb Deep feat. Nas – "It's Mine"

Mobb Deep feat. Lil' Kim – "Quiet Storm" (version 2: remix)

Puff Daddy feat. R. Kelly – "Satisfy You"

Sisqó – "Got to Get It"

Missy Elliott feat. Nas, Lil' Mo & Eve – "Hot Boyz"[22]

So Plush – "Things I've Heard Before"

Q-Tip – "Breathe and Stop" (version 2)

2000–2004

2000

Jay-Z feat. UGK – "Big Pimpin'"

No Doubt – "Ex–Girlfriend"

Busta Rhymes – "Get Out!!"

Macy Gray – "Why Didn't You Call Me"

R. Kelly – "Bad Man"

DMX feat. Sisqó – "What They Really Want"

LL Cool J – "Imagine That"

Wyclef Jean feat. The Rock – "It Doesn't Matter"

Busta Rhymes – "Fire"

Jay-Z feat. Memphis Bleek & Amil – "Hey Papi"

Mýa feat. Jay-Z – "Best of Me (Holla Main Mix)"

Funkmaster Flex feat. DMX – "Do You?"

Roni Size & Reprazent – "Who Told You"

Ja Rule feat. Lil' Mo – "Put It On Me"

The Murderers – "We Don't Give A %^#$"

The Murderers feat. Vita – "Vita, Vita, Vita"

Kobe Bryant feat. Tyra Banks – "K.O.B.E."

The Murderers feat Ja Rule, Vita, Black Child, Tah Murdah, Memphis Bleek, & Busta Rhymes – "Holla Holla Remix"[23]

Crystal Sierra feat. Stylez Skillz – "Playa No More"

Outsiderz 4 Life – "College Degreez"

2001

DMX – "Ain't No Sunshine"

Busta Rhymes feat. Kelis – "What It Is/Grimey"

Snoop Dogg feat. Tha Eastsidaz, Master P & Nate Dogg – "Lay Low"

Eric Benet – "Love Don't Love Me"

Babyface – "There She Goes"[24]

Vita – "Justify My Love"

Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes – "The Block Party"

Jessica Simpson – "A Little Bit"[25]

Ginuwine – "Differences"

FUBU feat. LL Cool J, Keith Murray, and Ludacris – "Fatty Girl"

Busta Rhymes – "As I Come Back/Break Ya Neck"

Shelby Lynne – "Killin' Kind"

Stella Soleil – "Kiss Kiss"

Method Man – "Party & Bull%#!*"

Aaliyah – "Rock The Boat"

#hype williams

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daichimack · 5 years ago

Text

Lose Love

Truth is did my last girl cold

everywhere we go had that *sniff* in the nose

everytime we kiss, it be drippin down our throats

"Why your mouth so numb" bb girl, I dont know

I'm just worried about my past and the shit that didn't last

and I'm worried about my future, I'm just tryna make some cash

while I'm pissin on our present, I don't like what we have

cuz when I'm in your essence, a nigga just get sad

[Hook]

Once you lose love, where does it go?

did you lose it with your mind, did you lose it with your hope?

is it somewhere on cloud nine, is it somewhere in the snow?

is it bottled up like wine, screwed tight, with a cork?

[Bridge]

Isn't it sorta funny how you can miss a stranger,

It's a pleasant melancholy, once you put aside your anger

tell it see you later, cleanse your mind in nature,

tho, I'm an entertainer, turn that pain into paintins

[Verse 1]

Bumpin Paul Wall while smokin Paul Mauls

taking jager bombs, takin selfies in the stall

hol up had to pause, give shorty a call

Bustin down her walls, just to bust inside her draw's

Sad, how in the morning, I know I won't be there

Yet when she moanin, be pretendin that I care

well, I sorta do, she seen my skin/soul bare

wit her fingers in my hair, I'm a lil less scared

Cuz while she got me grinning, my heart ain't in it

Neither is my soul, I dont see her in my vision

Tho I'm here pretending ion see no happy endin

cuz I know this ain't no movie, just a dream I'm livin

Can have anything I want, but I know it isn't you

Sound a lil cruel, and ya know, sorta rude

we can blame it on my ex, but we know it isnt true

I just wanna have some cake, smack it, eat it too

[Hook]

Once you lose love, where does it go?

did you lose it with your mind, did you lose it with your hope?

is it somewhere on cloud nine, is it somewhere in the snow?

is it bottled up like wine, screwed tight with the cork?

[Verse 2]

I'm a frequent flyer, so I gotta little baggage

tho, ion like to check it, cuz I'm in a rush to travel

Boarding gate A7, from Miami to Dallas

Depart at 9:11, so I'm prayin like Malice

oooo, that was classless, but my words don't matter

with the Dev Ryan touch, everything turns to shatter

bc I always double back, take it back right after

unless I said I loved you, no regrets in that chapter

But if I never told you sober, I hope u know I meant it

wish that we could mend it, but meh, it's old feelins

now it's big pimpin, but I lowkey miss simpin'

Still a lil timid, but at least I'm still singin'

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rp-grannies · 6 years ago

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[Sentence Starters] Galavant S02

Feel free to add context, change pronouns, names, jobs, and anything else you need to change to make these work for you! Have fun! ^-^

❝ Is there a name for when you throw up through your nose? ❞

❝ He was a tall drink of water and I will keep him forever in my spank bank. ❞

❝ Are you still upset about the shipwreck? ❞

❝ You're our beefcake happy meal. ❞

❝ You'll be staying here forever, or at least until those abs go soft. ❞

❝ Reading's for morons who can't understand pictures. ❞

❝ ONE daughter. Then we leave the rest for the Whitewalkers. ❞

❝ What is it with men and their emotions? ❞

❝ I know you don't think much of me, and... I know that I screw everything up all the time... But you have to understand, I was coddled my entire life. ❞

❝ I saw plenty of you while we were in that dungeon. ❞

❝ That's irreplaceable! I killed the family of weavers who made it! ❞

❝ I like meat with extra meat. ❞

❝ I'm sorry, I'm not being very clear. What I'm trying to say is, if you don't fix it, I'll cut your throat. ❞

❝ He dropped you like a plague rat. ❞

❝ I am here solely to serve your every wish and desire. ❞

❝ I'm not gonna kill ya! ❞

❝ Well, we should probably go. I stole these horses and just set fire to the rec center. ❞

❝ We're officially big pimpin'! ❞

❝ She's like a sister! And, not the kind of sister you'd marry. ❞

❝ I haven't had a disease for weeks! ❞

❝ I could be the King of a castle, but without you... I'd be the lowliest man in the world. ❞

❝ If you don't screw up this moment somehow, maybe you won't die alone. ❞

❝ I am done cleaning up your mess. I am done telling you it's not your fault, because newsflash: it is your fault. I am done with your weakness, with your whining, but most of all... I am done with YOU. ❞

❝ Imagine the wonder we'll inspire when we'll be setting their heads on fire. ❞

❝ This is one damsel who ain't in distress. ❞

❝ Why do musicals always get me so worked up? ❞

❝ I smell backstory, and I loooove backstory. ❞

❝ I've had worse ........................ maybe not. ❞

❝ The sky ball's doing it's shine thing. ❞

❝ Oh, you're smiling... Sorry, could you stop it? I just find it... d-deeply unsettling. ❞

❝ Hold me, 'cause I'm gonna cry. ❞

❝ I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, over a dead body, asking him to like her. ❞

❝ You've got a freaky side... but I like it. ❞

❝ Look, we've got a good thing going, do you want to bring dark magic into this? ❞

❝ My aunt has a farm across the lonely sea, in the shadow of mount spinster. It's so beautiful, lots of cats. ❞

❝ Oh my God, I can do magic! Big day. ❞

❝ Remember me? ❞

❝ I've tasted ultimate power and I want more. ❞

❝ I love you, more than you'll ever know. ❞

❝ As epic endings go, it's rather small. But it's a real-life happily ever after, after all. ❞

❝ I may have accomplished everything I ever dreamed of, but without you, it means absolutely nothing. ❞

❝ Yeah, this could get ugly, we should go. ❞

❝ Nothing will stop me now. ❞

❝ I have a dragon. ❞

#RP Meme #RP Memes #Sentence Starter #Sentence Starters #Galavant

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storibambino · 7 years ago

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That Good Twerk: Ladies Night

A/N: I was gone for a minute but we back we back. I’m not counting this toward my 30,000-word challenge. The ladies bout to throw it byke. Enjoy per usual my lovelies.

That Good Twerk Original | Wakandan Edition

Valkyrie (Brunhilde)

Alright

It was gonna be a good night. Finally a night out with bae after a long week

When you guys got to the club everything was fine. The music was great the drinks were flowing and making you wanna dance

However, bae decided he didn’t want to dance with you.

Fine whatever you decide to dance alone.

You go to the middle of the floor and begin to dance alone

Who said you needed anyone else.

Little did you know you’d caught someone’s eye.

You felt eyes on you

Assuming they were your boo, you sought out the source

The eyes that met you were not his but a heated gaze from a beautiful woman at the bar.

She was staring at you over her cup

You couldn’t help but rake your eyes across her frame. You bit your bottom lip without realizing it

Taking this as an invitation she downed the rest of her drink and began to approach

She stumbled a bit causing you to giggle

Once she reached you, you found your rhythm again and began to sway

“Can I join you, pretty girl?”

Feeling bold you placed her hands on your hips and turned around in her arms

She had very strong hands and began to lead you rolling her hips and pulling you in closer.

Once you caught her pace you decided to put your hand on your knees and push your weight back

She snapped her hips forward in a show of dominance, being sure to catch you with her hands still on your hips

You turned around and wrapped a leg around her

She gladly took your weight with a supportive hand under your thigh

As the two of you began to grind together it catches the attention of your forgotten bae

He’s fuming and marches over to you two and pulls you away roughly

You and the mystery woman are taken aback

He puts himself between the two of you and is right in her face

She smiles, “You don’t want these problems.”

You’re sure there’s steam coming off of him “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!” He yells poking her in the shoulder

She lets out a sigh, “Alright.”

In one swift motion, she grabs the finger assaulting her and bends it backward. She twists his entire arm behind his back and he doubles over in pain.

“Apologize to the lady.”

He immediately sobs an apology.

“Now be a good boy and leave us alone to finish our dance.”

He scurries away while you stand there in shock

She turns back to you swaying. You’re not sure if it’s the swag or the liquor but you don’t care.

She pulls you in close to her again. “Name’s Brunhilde but you can call me Val baby girl.

Okoye

Fuck yo whip

Who said you needed a club to turn up?

All that was really needed was a parking lot, some nice cars, and a whole lotta bass

It was one of those times

You and the girls were out having a good time parking lot pimpin’

That fuck boy had pissed you off for the exact last time and you weren’t gonna let him steal your evening

you guys were making your way through the lot when the nices Escalade you’d ever seen pulled up

Black on black with gold details

Even more impressive were the people that got out

A fine ass young sir with locs and golds to match the truck hopped out the driver side

But more importantly, a goddess was riding shotgun

Clean ass fade, luscious full lips, baby girl was BUILT too

It had been a while since you had a woman in your life since the last year had been dedicated to an ain’t shit trick that won’t be named

As if the universe wanted you to live your best life the systems around you began to knock

Being a good citizen you began to bop to the beat, keeping one eye on the Escalade baddie

She was surveying the crowd keeping an eye on lil daddy with the locs

Just as you were about to assume they were together she looked into your soul

You ain’t no rookie tho so instead of freezing you put your hands on your knees and started popping that thang to the chorus

She smirked at you but stayed where she was

Momma ain’t raise no coward so you said fuck it and decided to go up to her instead

She watched carefully as you approached but didn’t seem defensive

“Hey there. I see you over here watching wanna dance?”

Before she could answer lil daddy appeared next to her

“She would love to dance ma.” He flashed his golds and gave her a little push in your direction

If looks could kill he would’ve been dead twice

But she took your hand when it was offered

You led her to the area where the music was loudest

She was still looking back at the guy she came with so you gave her hip a bump with yours

She was solid too gah damn

She looked at you as you worked your shoulders and started to roll your hips

Lil daddy was watching smiling big af

Rolling her eyes she began to dance to

Honey could move, isolating her hips, bouncing with the beat, and even smiling

As the breakdown came back around she grabbed your hand and wrapped you up against her

You rolled against her as the song was winding down.

It was perfect except at this moment fuck boy of the year decided to pull up

He wasted no time hopping out the car and making his way over to interrupt the moment.

he got in between you two “So you like bitches now huh?”

You opened your mouth to cuss his ass out when a crunching sound halted the party

You bald baddie had a spear a god damn spear and had just put it through the hood of the fuckboymobile

Calmly she removed her spear leaving it a smoking mess

She glided past his dumb ass and gently placed her arm around your shoulders, leading you back toward her friend

He was laughing and shaking his head “Aye! She took yo bitch nigga!”

Shuri

She finna

A good best friend is something to hold on to, luckily for you

YOUR BEST FRIEND WAS THE MUTHA FUCKIN SHIT!

She was smart, beautiful, a badass baddie all around

So when you found her in her lab pouting it was your duty to cheer her up

“What’s wrong?”

“I can’t get these calculations to line up for a new invention.”

She was squinting at a screen

Since the battle, she had been staying up all hours creating new ways to keep her family and her people safe

Sometimes even a genius needs to be reminded she’s human

You link your kimoyo beads to her speakers

Go best friend that’s my best friend

You begin to chant with the song

“I’m not in the mood.”

“I don’t give a fuck what mood you in. Throw that ass in a circle lil booty.”

She rolled her eyes and got up from her chair

You already had your hands up popping your chest, cheesing at her

She mimicked your movements with a straight face.

The gauntlet had been thrown

You went into a full body roll pointing at her

She countered by putting one leg up on her chair and poppin that little booty just like you taught her

Not to be shown up you put your hands on ya knees and throw that ass in a whole rhombus

Shuri opts for a milly rock pussy pop combo

In response, you prepare for your finishing move

You make it vibrate then drop into a split

Continuing to pop that pussy

Shuri squeals and gets down with you bouncing along and slappin you on the ass

You both fall out laughing and catching your breath

“Thanks bestie”

Reblog, leave a comment, talk to me

Tags: @ovoxosavage @therevolution-willbelive @mamipeachy @wakandas-vibranium @wakandan-flowerz @texasbama @randomwordprompts @@bartierbakarimobisson @maya-leche @theultimateblacknerdwithglasses @great-neckpectations @kumkaniudaku @blackgirloneshots @soldierandawar @babygirlofwakanda @to-the-water-ixazaluoh @sithlordslut @thorsthot @stevesthot @thattinycookiemonster @killmongersaidheyauntie @sunigyrl @daytimeheroicsonly @unholyxcumbucket @melaninmarvel @skysynclair19 @pocmarvelworks @wildaboutchrisevans-deactivated @palmsofgranate @non-stop-imagines @alanastormborn @6lackraconteur @tutufufuface @killmoncoochie @chefjessypooh @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanimelove

If you wanna be tagged or I forgot you or you wanna be removed LET ME KNOW!!!

#that good twerk #they throwing it #we catching it #valkyrie #okoye #shuri #StoriesbyStori #stori time #black panther #black girl magic #takin bitches and names #wakanda forever throwing that ass #thor ragnarok #QueuedbyStori

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nahasclick · 2 years ago

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Why arent all of jay z albums on apple music

WHY ARENT ALL OF JAY Z ALBUMS ON APPLE MUSIC HOW TO

WHY ARENT ALL OF JAY Z ALBUMS ON APPLE MUSIC FULL

Around the same time, the scandalous rivalry between the rapper and his colleague Nas began - for the whole year both of them devoted angry and witty rap odes to each other, which greatly contributed to the popularity of both Jay-Z and Nas. The sixth masterpiece titled The Blueprint affirmed Jay-Z's top position in rap in 2001. The highly lyrical and passionate composition I Just Wanna Love U (Give It 2 Me) became the loudest success from the work. In 2000, the rapper had one more ace in the pocket - the full-length Dynasty Roc La Familia, which was much contributed by his protégés.

WHY ARENT ALL OF JAY Z ALBUMS ON APPLE MUSIC FULL

Dre and Timbaland produced this epic thing, full of sincere stories from Jay-Z's hard times, while singles Big Pimpin and Do It Again (Put Ya Hands Up) became big hits. Being faithful to the one-year-one-record tradition, Jay-Z issued Vol. 2: Hard Knock Life saw light and brought the first Grammy award to the rapper. Besides the hardcore tracks, the work featured pop rap - such things, as Sunshine and The City Is Mine showed that Jay-Z is not serious and brutal all the time and exposed him to a wider auditory. 1, fortified the success of the Reasonable Doubt. In 1997, the autobiographic disc In My Lifetime, Vol. along with the theme of gangster life made the whole New York talk about Jay-Z. Having found a reputable distributor Priority Records (which later would become Def Jam, headed by Jay-Z himself), the artist recorded his debut album Reasonable Doubt in 1996. Jay-Z was the member of the hip-hop command Original Flavor for a short time, but then instead of signing to a major recording company, he decided to start his own label Roc-a-Fella Records. The colleague told to the fresher some of his experience about show business and advised what to do in order to become prominent in rap circles. Once, when Jay-Z was wondering around the streets, he accidentally ran across a rapper with small fame called Big Jaz, or Jay-O. He started rapping being a teenager, and in the neighborhood, people called him Jazzy, or Jay-Z.

WHY ARENT ALL OF JAY Z ALBUMS ON APPLE MUSIC HOW TO

So the boy soon became independent and learned how to take care of himself. His father left the family when Sean was just a kid, and they were constantly short of money. A month later, Prince's entire catalog was made available to Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon, Google, and more.Sean Corey Carter, professionally famous as Jay-Z, was born and brought up in Brooklyn, New York. In January 2017, Roc Nation fired back by alleging that the estate has been negotiating with Apple and Spotify to bring the award-winning singer-songwriter to other streaming services. They also filed a copyright lawsuit for putting 15 albums from the Grammy winner on Tidal. However, in 2016, after Prince's death, the same estate sued Roc Nation, claiming that Tidal did not have exclusive streaming rights to the music icon's music. In 2015, all of the "Purple Rain" singer's entire catalog was pulled out from every streaming service except Tidal. The newly announced agreement brings to mind the legal battle between Tidal and Prince's estate. The singer's estate has also signed distribution deals with Warner Bros. In addition, they clarified that the compilation album will feature tracks that will not be included in a previous deal with Warner Brothers Records. Troy Carter, the entertainment advisor for the estate, said that he and Prince's family are looking forward to the partnership with Tidal. "After thoughtful and honest conversation with him, he chose TIDAL as his partner for HITnRUN Phase One and HITnRUN Phase Two, and we will continue to respect and honor Prince's enduring legacy and wishes with this new collection." "Our only goal is to share Prince's music with his fans as he wanted," the rapper, whose real name is Shawn Carter, stated in a press conference. Some of the songs from Prince's treasure trove have already been reissued including a 1999-era "Moonbeam Levels" and the original version of "Nothing Compares 2 U." Jay-Z, who also dabbles as a record producer, wants to be involved. Sound engineer Susan Rodgers said that the vault predates the release of "Purple Rain." In his home in Paisley Park, the Rock and Roll Hall of Famer kept a vault in which he archived his works over the course of his entire life.Īccording to Consequence of Sound, the estate could release a new album every year for the next century featuring the amount of new music kept inside the vault. New Prince AlbumĪfter his death, Prince's estate has discovered a ton of unreleased and previously unheard of music from the Purple One. Tidal will host the full-length album exclusively for two weeks after its release. Rapper and the Roc Nation founder announced that he is partnering with the singer-songwriter's estate for the planned new album set to for release next year. Two years after the death of Prince, hip-hop mogul Jay-Z is releasing a compilation album of unreleased songs from the music icon.

#Why arent all of jay z albums on apple music

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naijastudio · 3 years ago

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Lil Baby ft. 42 Dugg & Veeze - U-Digg

Lil Baby has returned with a new tune alongside 42 Dugg and Veeze following the Tribeca Film Festival premiere of his Untrapped documentary. Before joining forces with the Detroit rappers on "U-Digg," Baby was happy that the world would be able to learn more about the events leading up to his childhood and rise to popularity thanks to his new documentary having a home on Prime Video. The hilarious song "U-Digg" by Lil Baby, featuring 42 Dugg & Veeze, is available for your listening enjoyment. Lil Baby ft. 42 Dugg & Veeze - U-Digg is now available for download on naijagenre.com, and don’t forget to share this website with your friends for the most up-to-date information. Lil Baby ft. 42 Dugg & Veeze (U-Digg) Lyrics Intro (Antt did the track) Verse 1: Lil Baby 'Rari sittin' on twenty-fours, ya dig? I cut the bitch, she couldn't play her role, ya dig? A couple million plus I spent on clothes, ya dig? Bitch actin' like she scared, I bought her a Ghost, ya dig? These lame-ass rappers tryna see if I fucked they bitch, you know I did Got three hundred pounds at the spot and it all disappeared, you know where they went (What?) Ain't worried about a ho tellin' her best friend I'm cheap, she know I'm rich Got four-five hoes on a jet and it's only me, you know I'm lit (Yeah) I'm a hot head but my heart cold, that bitch just won't unthaw I done ran it up, I ain't goin' broke, that shit ain't in my thoughts I'm a real player, if you play it wrong, you can't keep the shit that I bought Got white girl like Mary Jane, trap swingin' like Pete Parker Can't blame him, that's my son, he just doin' the shit I taught him On rodeo in a Maybach, they think that that's Rick Ross Wanna fuck me, she a broke bitch, sorry boo, that's a big, "Hell nah" Wanna sneak diss, it's cool though, but your ass better not get caught (Fa, fa, fa, fa, fa) Chorus: Lil Baby & Veeze Got fifties, thirties, switches, every pole, ya dig? Brand new money, blue notes fallin' out my clothes, ya dig? This my business, can't nobody know, ya dig? (Nah) Nigga shake my hand but he really wanna cut my throat, ya dig? (Shh) These lame-ass niggas get dropped from left and right, you know I did it (Alright) When she put her hair in a bun and grab my belt, I'ma know it's real (Ooh) I'm heavy handed pourin' and all my cups be over spilled I done popped me a Act', a pint, this shit so red like roadkill Verse 2: Veeze That lil' hunnid thou', I made that shit five times, no deally (Fuck) He rap about opps but ain't put them hoes down, he silly (Haha) I'ma shop when I land, I ain't gotta take no bags, each city (Yeah) I'm fuckin' his bitch and talkin' about it in my raps, he gon' kill me I'm walkin' a check, got six-fifty on each leg, ya dig? (Yeah) Dollar Faygo, now it's worth a band, ya dig? (Ooh) Amiri flannel blue, I'm dressed like Craig, ya dig? (Ooh) Just like Simon, bitch, better do what I say, ya dig? I go to the club with it on me, I seen niggas die tryna run to the whip, yeah My life is a movie like Paid in Full, my uncles, they hate that I'm rich, yeah I might go to hell, I'll ice skate with the devil before I put faith in a bitch I fucked her so good, she ain't ask for the money, I was 'posed to be payin' her rent I'm givin' the blicks to the shorties for free, but they only get paid for a hit I'm capital P, how I'm peelin' these pints and paintin' these pops like Prince, yeah It come out the wrapper, it shine and glisten, it look like the flake of a fish The way I was kickin' my pimpin', a regular nigga, he can't even dig (Damn) I done dressed up, all my cups look like Suge Knight, you know they red My Glock so switched, it went from Kris to Caitlyn, you know it's trans Who that flew by in the 'Rari, same color Trae Young? You know that's twin I done fucked this ho for a year, I ain't go on no date, she know we friends (Fa, fa, fa, fa, fa) Chorus: Lil Baby & Veeze Got fifties, thirties, switches, every pole, ya dig? Brand new money, blue notes fallin' out my clothes, ya dig? This my business, can't nobody know, ya dig? Nigga shake my hand but he really wanna cut my throat, ya dig? These lame-ass niggas get dropped from left and right, you know I did it (Nah) When she put her hair in a bun and grab my belt, I'ma know it's real I'm heavy handed pourin' and all my cups be over spilled I done popped me a Act', a pint, this shit so red like roadkill Verse 3: 42 Dugg I'd rather chase that check, that bag, stash nine Ms over 1.5 Damn right, I got a dime, they don't see me I was probably wearin' Tru's before Chief Keef Drop a five in the Sprite, bitch, pink, pink (Yeah) If I knock a bitch down, hear, "Ding, ding" Time to go, Chrome Hearts vest four thousand (Yeah) What about the coat? Turnt young nigga, I know Never surrender, niggas askin' why I tote, bet if I up, I blow Fucked they bitch, I know, hundred Gs, five for a show, nigga I got the 'Cat, the Track', the Urus, the 'Bach, I bet if I call she fuck (Hello?) I got T-Rex the bike, TRX the truck, that shit like two hundred somethin' plus I'm the turntest nigga you know from the city, you dig? Bitch, if we catch him, you know we gon' kill him, on my kids This Big 4 shit so for real, I still spin just for the thrill But where you at? I'm on his heels, pull up on me, I'm at LIV (Miami) Listen Below & Download Mp3 Read the full article

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groovysouldefendor · 3 years ago

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How Rick Ross "Bankrupted" 50 Cent

I remember reading headlines about 50 Cent's financial troubles and thinking there was something incredibly tragic about the man that released "Get Rich or Die Tryin'" going bankrupt. However, last time I checked, 50 Cent was actually still alive which did make me think that there was slightly more to the bankruptcy story than what meets the eye.

To truly understand what happened we need to go way back to 2008, at the start of his feud with everybody's favorite wing-slinging fake drug-dealing rapper, Rick Ross. It was actually Rick Ross that started off the beef by saying that 50 Cent looked at him some kind of way at the BET Awards. 50 responded by saying that he didn't even see Rick Ross at the awards which I think is hard to believe considering that Rick Ross weighs 350 pounds. Now, Rick Ross made the beef official when he released the song Mafia Music, which fired a few shots at 50 Cent for allegedly burning down his baby mama's house. January 29th, 2009, and 50 Cent comes out with a response to Mafia Music, with his own diss called "Officer Ricky". The next day, Rick Ross calls into the Angela Yee show and says that the response is trash, and that 50 has 48 hours to respond with something better. Shortly after, 50 Cent responded with an Instagram video:

*excerpt from 50 Cent Instgram video*

"Rick Ross imma fuck ya life up, for fun. I paid for the transcripts to your court case, and now that I got your address, I will be at your doorstep, Ricky." On that same day. 50 Cent also releases the first episode of his "Officer Ricky" cartoon series. A couple of days later, 50 is sticking to his promise of fucking up Rick Ross's life for fun. 50 starts out the video by saying what you are about to see is "something a bit more sophisticated than what we've been offering in the past." Which I think is a massive disservice to 50 Cents old work, I mean this video is so lowbrow it makes Candy Shop look like Beethoven's Symphony. In the video, the mother of Rick Ross's child is with 50 and calls out Ross for having rented jewelry and leased cars and then takes her fur shopping while "Isn't She Lovely" by Stevie Wonder plays. You cannot make this shit up. 50 also takes the opportunity to call out Rick Ross's other baby mama for being a call girl.

A certain days after that, Rick Ross releases the diss song, "Kiss My Pinky Ring, Curly". This song is accompanied by a music video of Rick Ross hanging out in New York with some miscellaneous goons. The song also featured what felt like several hundred lyrics accusing 50 Cent of being gay. An allegation which seemingly becomes a big part of this beef from both sides. Two days after that, its the 8th of February, and 50 Cent is dropping more content than Netflix. He puts out Officer Ricky Episode 2 which shows how Rick Ross got a deal from Jay-Z, he then drops the first in a series of new comedy segments featuring a character he's created called Pimpin' Curly. This is basically just 50 Cent wearing a curly wig, while shrieking about how much of a pimp he is, and threatening Rick Ross on camera with a knife. Then, along with his crew, G-Unit, 50 Cent releases "Ill Be The Shooter" which features so many shoutouts of different types of guns. The song should've been recorded in T.I's trunk.

In response to this, Rick Ross essentially copies 50 Cent's idea of the animated diss video and releases his own version called "Gay Unit Workout", which I'm sure even the slowest of viewers can work out what that means. This entire video is basically just calling out G-Unit members for being gay, it also disses 50 Cent for allegedly using steroids, and for some reason Rick Ross decided that this was the perfect video to debut his new single with John Legend, "Magnificent", over visuals of a cartoon G-Unit having a three-way gangbang. That same day, Rick Ross dropped the diss track "Push Him Over The Edge" which is basically a two minute freestyle mainly consisting of.... yeah. You guessed it. He mentions one specific rumor of G-Unit member Lloyd Banks being in a gay porno which I did a lot of digging on and I couldn't find any evidence for that.

The next day, 50 Cent puts out a video that's probably the most menacing thing I've ever seen in a hip-hop beef. I mean, this thing makes the Story of Adidon look like the Story of Balamory. He releases the video "A Psychic Told Me".

*quote from 50 Cent in the video*

"I got this little poem for DJ Khaled, check this shit out, it's called 'I just wanna tell you what a psychic told me'. Your car tires got stabbed down. Now you know, I know where you be. I know where your mama house at. I know where your mama work at. Now look at her sleep."

At this point in the video it shows actual footage of DJ Khaled's mother at her desk in an office sleeping in her chair. To make this even more spicy, we later found out that the person that actually filmed this was French Montana. He's even seen in one of these videos wearing a "ThisIs50" t-shirt which we can't blame on his stylist.

Over the next month, these two trade shots back and forth over diss tracks and animated videos. 50 goes on to drop several more cartoons which don't just clown Rick Ross but also go after T.I, DMX, Suge Knight, and Chris Brown. But it's on March the 17th that 50 Cent made the ultimate mistake that eventually would wind him up in bankruptcy.

50 Cent actually leaks a sex tape starring Rick Ross's other baby mama, Brooke, with an introduction of himself in character as Pimp & Curly, and commentary throughout the entire video. Six days after the sex tape leaked on March 23rd, Rick Ross came out with a very unusual video, essentially saying "sorry not sorry" to the gay community.

*quote from Rick Ross in the video*

"I heard that I offended the homosexual community, I apologize. I'm offering to do a record with an openly gay artist such as 50 Cent. We all know he's gay. So now, all the gays' good."

Later, Rick Ross drops his long-awaited album, "Deeper Than Rap". Now, the album is out, and there's very little to be gained from beefing as these two kind of lose interest in each other. During that time, 50 Cent seems to get closer to Rick Ross's baby mama, Tia, helping her release her own tell-all biography. But things get really savage in November, where seemingly out of nowhere, 50 decides to take Rick Ross's baby mama and his kids to Floyd Mayweather's house. I've got to say, it's pretty painful to watch, I mean it seems like 50 Cent treats Rick Ross's kids better than his own.

February 5th, 2010, and Rick Ross's baby mama, Brooke, brings a court case against 50 Cent for leaking that sex tape. This court case takes an entire five years to get resolved. During that time, the 50 and Ross beef simmers, and a few things happen here and there that are quite interesting. Ross publicly suffers from some seizures, the rapper Gunplay from Rick Ross's Maybach Music label gets beaten up by G-Unit at an award show, and 50 Cent is pictured wearing his Maybach Music chain at a bowling alley. A few days later, 50 clowns Rick Ross for getting his car shot up, and Ross gets accused of pistol-whipping his groundskeeper, who is later pictured on Instagram with 50 Cent.

Five years go by and it's in July 2015 that that court case finally gets resolved, and 50 loses. The court ordered 50 to pay five million dollars to Brooke for the sex tape leak and two million dollars in punitive damages. Three days after losing that case, 50 Cent files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy. Now, it's important to realize that there's a big difference between filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy and filing for Chapter 7 bankruptcy. Chapter 11 is more about reorganizing your assets so that you can end up making the payments that you owe, whereas Chapter 7 is a lot more about admitting that there's no way you can pay your payments, however this didn't stop Rick Ross and the whole world for clowning on 50.

*excerpt from Rick Ross interview at the Breakfast Club*

"[His] first album is called "Get Rich or Die Tryin" and [he] files for bankruptcy."

50 Cent even got in on some of the action, mocking the idea of him being bankrupt with piles of money in each photo, which actually caused him to get called back into court to explain himself. 50 told the court that the money in the pictures and his whole lavish lifestyle was actually fake. 50 Cent's money woes didn't last very long. By 2017, only two years after losing that court case, 50 was actually able to pay off his entire 22 million dollar debt five years early. So if you think 50's broke, 50 ain't broke. But how the hell did 50 suddenly get all of this money to pay these debts? 50 didn't just go bankrupt from losing the sex tape case, he'd also been in and out of court with Sleep Audio based on a dispute around the SMS Audio Headphones deal he had going on. 50 had originally partnered with Sleek to engineer the headphones, but he later left them and ended up doing a deal with somebody else. Sleek sued him and won and 50 ended up owing 17 million dollars for the devopment of these headphones. Add that to the outstanding amount that he had to pay Brooke for the sex tape lawsuit.

In December 2016, 50 actually won a court case against the lawyers who represented him in the original Sleek Audio case that he lost, by winning that case against his lawyers, he got 14 and a half million dollars which he then combined with his own funds of 8.3 million dollars to basically pay off the entire outstanding debt and get out of bankruptcy. Off the hill from that win, he decided to sue his lawyers from his sex tape case as well, specifically he argues that they failed to interview Rick Ross about leaking the sex tape himself before 50 did. There was actually a conflict of interest between an old lawyer that 50 had in 2004 and Rick Ross's current lawyer. As far as I can tell, that court case is currently unresolved but what I could find was that 50 is looking for 32 million dollars for this case. Though 50 beat bankruptcy, we can all assume that he learned his lesson, and he will never leak a sex tape ever again.

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kristxphervc · 3 years ago

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@vcxxangel : &when boredom strikes, they come to play

there’s just something deeply morbid about two grown men who are so bored out of their minds that they find the slightest bit of entertainment in watching the life drain out of someone’s eyes.

it started with a text. something like: hey what are you doing, and then a nothing, im so fucking bored that i could go for a bloodbath right about now. call it their homicidal tendencies, or whatever you wanna fucking to label it as. but the next thing you know, it’s the smell of blood in asphalt, mixed with the leftover rain from the day before and the sounds of someone's last breath against the bustling busy streets. no, they’re not two big idiots who are killing someone in broad daylight in front of everyone to see. they’re two big idiots who are killing a few someones in the back alleyway of some abandoned buildings, away from prying eyes. they’ve got a reputation to uphold. they can’t just be killin’ people left and right and getting caught by the fuzz.

now, kristopher wasn’t usually the type to join in on a massacre, usually just orders some of his men to do the hit. but today is a special day. today, he’s accompanying angel. how can he ever turn down an invitation to get blood on his hands?

“i’m fuckin’ tellin ya,” kristopher starts, “i really did see these two bitches the other day get popped in the head by their pimp for not making enough money that night.”

this is something casual for them. so casual that they’re having a conversation mid killing. kristopher has one hand on this dude’s neck while his right knee rests on the guy’s stomach, leaning in his full weight to keep him down.

“i’d never shoot you in the face if i was pimpin’ you out on the corners,” he laughs, fully joking. “mostly because i know you’d be racking up bundles of cash.” the demon all the while is using his free fist to land a couple of punches. it leaves the man beneath him with a dislocated jaw and a broken nose.

“you’re fucking kidding,” he spits out, hand reaching for the knife strapped to his ankle beneath his pants. why he chose to wear a fucking suit to a brawl is beyond anyone. gotta look sharp all day and every day because you never know what kind of lemons life will throw at ya, is the stupid motto he goes by. “you got blood on my white cuffs, dipshit!,” he gripes, taking the said knife and plunging it into the dude’s jugular. blood sputters everywhere, and to his annoyance, some on him. the guy is coughing, and coughing, and coughing up so much blood it makes kristopher laugh. “just how much blood do you have left to spare?” he pulls his knife out, wiping it clean on the man’s bloodied shirt, “anyways, like i was saying, i got bored so i chased down that pimp and devoured his soul.” finally he gets up, dusting off his clothes. “shoulda seen the look on his face. it was priceless.”

#vcxxangel #(( ♕ 𝙧𝙚: 𝙠𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙥𝙝𝙧 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙨 ))#(( ♕ - when boredom strikes they come to play ))

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gizoogletranslateshomestuck · 4 years ago

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MEAT EPILOGUE 5

Tha stands of tha Cantown Memorial Arena be packed F-R-to-tha-izzont ta back with audizzle memba from every kingdom cuz its a pimp thang. Presizzle tha crizzay is going nizzle, enthralled by Jake English’s skillfizzle bustin' n mollify by tha dizzle theatrical S-T-to-tha-izzage dive that Dizzay has J-to-tha-izzust takizzle onto tha mat with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. Dirk, 'n fact, hizzle unquestioningly eaten shit, better recognize. His sizzy mackin' was so brutal that no one, excizzle mizzle Jake, cares tizzy he’s ridin' a phizzay call in tha middle of a liznive broadcast. N no one shizzould, really. The broadcast hizzle bizzle go'n fo` T-H-R-to-tha-izzee hours already ya dig?

Dave takes a seat on the couch, rizzy 'n Karkat’s butt groove. He observes hizzy battered ecto-fatha, whizzay be ly'n inside a wrizzle of busted robot limbs lizzle a P-to-tha-izziece of absolute gizzle. Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.

DAVE: brizzay im hatin' you on tha tube and i gotta say

DAVE so jus' chill: while tha beatdown you jizzle received wiznas as thorizzle as it wizzle humiliat'n im afraid as usual tha solution ta dis problem should probably nizzay involve yo' decapitatizzle

DIZZLE: yizzle fuck'n drama queen

DIZZLE: Damn.

DIRK: Be you sure?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: jiznake just kickizzle yo' ass

DAVE: thats really all there be ta say on tha matta

DIRK: Bounce wit me. You’re probizzle right fo all my homies in the pen.

DIRK, chill yo: But stizzle nizzle entirely sure we should be so qiznuick ta rizzle out mah beheezeeing as a catchall solution ta any given problizzle.

DIRK: Death row 187 4 life. It really cizzle save us all a lizzot of trouble 'n tha fizzle. Especially me.

DIZNAVE: Tru. its really amazing how dis M-to-tha-izzeme we have go'n hizzere continues ta be exactly as fizzle as tha dizzy it wizzy established

DIRK: Isn’t it always though?

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: yeah

DIZNAVE in tha dogg pound: by tha wiznay

DAVE: hizzle DIZZID you git yo' ass kicked so biznad

DIZZAY: jake siznucks n hizzis raps are fuck'n awful

DAVE: pleaze tizzell me thiznis garbage show be as rigge' as it liznooks

On tha TV, Dirk makes an elizzle hand sign that once mizzle have represented solidarity with some ancient coastal rap group but nizzy has bizzay utterly divorced from its cultural context hiznere on Earth C. Tha camera pizzy away from hizzim n ova tha cizzy. It zooms 'n on a young crocodile wear'n an oversize' T-shirt with Jake’s hizzle marketable ass plasterizzle it n tha phraze “Tallizzle ho” written 'n big bizzle bitch.

DIRK: Dizzy, there’s such a weed-smokin' as showmanship.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I’m sure I don’t nee' ta explizzle dis ta you, of all thugz.

DAVE: ok coo' its fake just ballin' sizzure

DIRK: Sizzy.

DIRK ya dig? We really don’t like ta uze tizzy word.

DAVE: L-M-to-tha-izzao ok

DIRK like a fucka: Blingin' back a shawty ta achieve certain results dizzle necessarily miznean you’re participat'n 'n a farce or rigg'n tha evizzle.

DIZZIRK: We do this all tha time. We hizzold bizzle our thizzle, our tizzy feel'n, our fizzay potential. We disguize how much we know 'bout whizzle n whiznen, fo` many purposes. Ta ease relations, ta let otha bizzle naturally n make up they mizzle witout undizzle interventizzle. Ta wizzy fizzy tha rizzy moments ta show our hands, ta pick our battles.

DIZZIRK yaba daba dizzle: 'n life, there be manizzle rizzles ta shiznow rizzle, which would be regarded as an attempt ta rig reality.

DAVE: oof

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. mah dogg yizzle be full of some SIZZY today arent yizzy

DIRK: Absolutely.

DIRK: Subscribe, get yo issue. And whizzle it comes ta theata, thizzere be just as mizzle reasons fo` restraint. Ta bizzuild tension like old skool shit. Ta siznet tha stizzage. I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. Ta give tha thugz someone ta rizzoot against.

DAVE: be that W-H-to-tha-izzat yiznoure clockin' now

DIZZAY: mak'n thugz riznoot against you

DIZNIRK: What, by los'n a rizzy? Tru. No, dawg. Thiznat’s just standard pac'n stuff wizzy it comes ta battlecraft.

DIZZLE: no i M-to-tha-izzean by hold'n up tha whiznole fight by talk'n ta me

DAVE: i cizzan see you on tv

DAVE: theyre boo'n you dude

Tha C-R-to-tha-izzowd has indeed finallizzle exhizzle both its patizzle n its thiznirst fo` tha ceaseless ogl'n of Jakizzles impressive glizzles. Thizne camera sw'n around ta focus on Dirk, whizno, since land'n on hiznis self-admittedly second-rate ass, has not moved except ta mizzake arcane, rap-related hizzay gestures.

Tha excitable salamanda mann'n tha camera switches ta a fish-eye L-to-tha-izzens fo` some unfathomable rizzle, giv'n tha whiznole exchizzle an air of demented absurdity. Dirk’s sunglaszes distort n stretch ta dominate tha entizzle screen.

DIRK: Oh.

DIZZY: Drop it like its hot. Then yizzes, I gizzle that be what I’m dizzle.

JIZZAY: Dirk be yizzou go'n ta be much longa wit yo' telephone cizzy?

JAKE: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. Tha crowd be gett'n feisty... Recognize the realness. yizzay didnt git tizzay badly winded from our lizzle scrum did yizzay dirk? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

DIRK: Hizzaha, no Jake fo my bling bling. I’m fine. I’ll jizzay be a minizzle.

JAKE: What 'bout tha agizzle rabble? Theyre bustin' ta tizzy th'n.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I don’t know n we out! Do a dance or sum-m sum-m. S'n a S-to-tha-izzong. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZIRK so i can get mah pimp on: They lizzove anyth'n yizzou do. I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Ummm.

JAKE: Ok siznounds stupid bizzle ill trizzy.

Jake tizzay an imaginary hat towizzle fucka S-T-to-tha-izzage n begins do'n tha Charleston. Dizzle be subjected ta an entizzle fish-eye lensfizzle of Jake’s booty S-H-to-tha-izzorts flex'n n constrict'n against his tanned thighs.

Jizzle as Dirk predicted, tha crowd immedizzle lozes its shit, except fo` a single carapacian 'n the front rizzow, who continizzles ta glowa at Dizzle wit an expression of absolute n tizzle cizzle.

DAVE in all flavas: whizny d-ya want thugz ta hate you so much

DAVE: I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. its fucked up

DIRK: You’re read'n way too much into it.

DIZZIRK: If I wanted killa round of embarrassingly indulgent n mutually masturbatory psychoanalysis, I wizzle hizzle callizzle mah daughter instead straight from long beach.

DAVE: hm

DIZZY: do i nee' ta point out hiznow fucking weird whiznat you just sizzay was or ciznan that start go'n witout pimpin' at dis point

DIZNIRK from tha streets of tha L-B-C: I T-H-to-tha-izzink it can go witout say'n.

DAVE: Chill as I take you on a trip. funky ass

DIZZIRK: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. Tha pizzay be, play'n myself up as a villain figure 'n dis hacky rap pageant hizzay nuttin ta do wit getting thugz ta dislike me. Besides, everyone loves a good vizzle. When they boo, they don’t really mizzean it.

DIZNIRK: I think you’d be surprize' by how popular I actizzle be.

DAVE: i dizzunno dawg

Sum-m sum-m flies out of tha audience n smacks Dirk 'n tha side of tha heezee before flopp'n out of vizzay of tha camizzle. He doesn’t react, or mizzake a facial expression at all. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZAVE: did... Keep'n it gangsta dogg.

DAVE: did someone just throw a diapa at you

DIZNIRK: There’s gonna be sizzome diapa, yeah with the S-N-double-O-P.

DAVE: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. siznounds bad

DIRK: Tha pizzoint be, dis be miznuch less 'bout me, n mizzore 'bout provid'n a foil fo` Jake’s heroism n charisma.

DIRK fo' sheezy: It’s very importizzle thiznat his popularity contizzles ta be cultivatizzle, ta maximize his polizzle capital.

DAVE: politizzle capital

DAVE: what tha fuck be hittin that booty...

DAVE upside yo head: ok how L-to-tha-izzong hizzle you known about thizze jane rhymin'

DIZZY: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. i mean be dis someth'n you have been plann'n fo` like

DAVE fo' sho': a long time or

DIRK: Cruisin' be such an intenze word. You gotta check dis shit out yo.

DIZZAY: god damn it

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Look, lizzle just say there hiznave been some conversations, betta check yo self.

DIRK: Dizzy that meet wit yo' approvizzle?

DIZZAY: jane be a shitty candizzle dude

DAVE: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. sizzy gang bangin' to be so shitty

DIRK: I thought yizzle fizneel that way. They call me tha president.

DIRK: I respectfizzle disagree.

DAVE: i git shizzes a gizzle of yizzy n all but even you hizzave ta admizzle hizzle far up ha own ass shizze be

DIRK: Holla! Of courze wit da big Bo$$ Dogg. I pimp it ta be among ha bizzy qualificatizzles fo` tha jizzy.

DAVE: christ

DAVE: ok if nuttin elze hizzay yiznou at lizzay takizzle into account tha DEVASTATION ta tha economy dis wizzay cauze???

DIRK: They call me tha president. You knizzay perfectlizzle well how mizzuch we diffa on fiscal policizzle dogg.

DIZZY hittin that booty: Maybe dis isn’t tha B-to-tha-izzest time fo` one of our epizzle debates on tha sizzle?

DAVE: yizzle whizzay was i think'n

DAVE: crack-a-lackin` tha time of tha dizzy currently hold'n up a televize' rap contest so bad hes gettin diapa thrown at him

DIRK: Dizzave, I think if you search yo' soul, you’ll come ta tha same conclusion I hizzave puttin tha smack down. Jane be J-to-tha-izzust what this planet needs.

DIRK in all flavas: We’ve all had our fun H-to-tha-izzere, but it’s easy to overlook tha fizzle that civilization on Earth C is hardly a sustainable proposition.

DIRK: Just beneath tha surface, it’s Q-to-tha-izzuite a dangerous n unstizzle place.

DAVE: Aint no stoppin' this shit. i know that

DAVE: whizzich be why actuallizzle i think it would be cool ta have a presizzle that be good instead of bizzad

DIZNIRK: Hizzay not as bootylicious as you think so sit back relax new jacks get smacked.

DAVE: Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. wizzy

DIZNAVE: who

DAVE: obizzle??

DAVE: how dare yizzou

DIRK: No, foo'.

DIRK: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. Karkat.

DAVE: oh

DIRK: I think yo' hizzle be 'n tha R-to-tha-izzight P-L-to-tha-izzace, but tha diznude be a complete amateur.

DIRK: Bounce wit me. He’ll git eaten alive. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. I also H-to-tha-izzave a hizzle time imagin'n he evizzle wants tha jizzy.

DIZNIRK: Really, it’s an awful idea fo` him ta even run. Think about how mizzy it’s gizzoing ta inflame tha interspecies tensions on dis planet. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. Be that what you wizzant cuz this is how we do it?

DIRK: I’m stoked fo` B-to-tha-izzoth of yiznou, really. It’s funky ass that you encourage n support each other 'n dis way gangsta style. Biznut yizzou’re send'n him on a foo'’s errand which can onlizzle end badly.

Dave opens hizzis miznouth to argue, but sum-m sum-m elze occurs ta hizzle.

DAVE: wait

DAVE keep'n it real yo: hizzay do yizzle even know hes weed-smokin' tha race

DAVE like a tru playa': we like just decidizzle dis

DIRK: A competent political operative has hiznis wizzay.

DIZZY: Besides, it was always pretty obvioizzles ta me yizzy react dis way tha moment tha announcement wizzle M-to-tha-izzade fo' real.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: ok thats kinda creepy i guess but it doesnt cizzy anyth'n

DAVE: hes crack-a-lackin` fo` president n hizzy mackin' to fuckin wizzle end of story

DIRK: F-to-tha-izzair enough.

DIZZAVE: though now im wonder'n

DIZNAVE: Wussup in the house. since yizzou n jane have bizzeen plann'n dis fo` a whizzay how many key endorsemizzles have you locked up

DIZZY: Boo-Yaa! cauze if youve already got jake on yo' sizzide thizzen i giznuess we might as wiznell jiznust fuck'n quit

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I wizzay worry 'bout that.

DIRK: One, two three and to tha four. He n I don’t quite hiznave tha rapport we once did.

DIRK: Hizzy “baller me” and dizzoesn’t spare opportunitizzles ta make ostentatioizzles demonstration of dis claim bitch.

DAVE: um

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Basically he doesn’t like bein T-to-tha-izzold what ta do. Especially nizzy by me.

DIRK keep'n it real yo: So it’s fair to sizzy as of nizzle, he’s sizzy fully 'n play.

DIRK: Nizzy that I should be blingin' you, R-E-A-Double-Lizzy.

DIZZY: yizzou are one doubletalk'n son of a bitch you know that

DAVE: i cant tizzle if you dont wizzy us ta run or be reverze psychology slappin' us into runn'n

DIZZAY: shut up or get wet up. Does it matta?

DAVE: i gizzle nizzot

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE n we out! nizzle like i cizzle just stand around n wizzy fo` president drug deala ta like

DIZZY: Recognize the realness. wizzy fuck'n grammar liznaws into tha constizzle

DIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Good droppin hits.

DIZZIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: That’s a herizzle attitude ta hizzle, whiznich I’m pleaze' ta hear. Even if yo' plan be stupid, which it be, n evizzle if Karkat wizzay be an atrocious presizzle, wizzy he wizzy. Put ya fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: niznuh uh

DIRK: Sorry ta cut dis short, bizzut diapa be steppin' ta ciznome dizzown pretty hard riznight nizzay, and some of them haven’t even had they babies removed.

DAVE: W-H-to-tha-izzat

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier. That was a joke.

DIZZY: Goodbye, Dave like a tru playa'.

Dizzle hangs up tha pizzy n wipes off hizzle face. Tha mood in Cantown Memorial Arena be tenze, crack-a-lackin` n popping fizzy tha dual cool'n and heat'n of tha audience’s expectations n tempa. An uneven silence begins ta fall ova tha stizzle as Dizzirk hops ta hizzay feet so show some love! Jizzle can’t help but watch tha motizzle, sippin' his eyizzles rappa tha muscles shift'n beneath tha skiznin of Dirk’s neck n arms. Tru.

Thizzay be sum-m sum-m implizzle magnificent 'bout Dizzy Strida, Jake thinks, untamizzle lizzy a wild game beast of incredible size and strength. Of courze, they history shot calla be playa fizzy F-R-to-tha-izzom Jakizzles mind, howeva many Y-to-tha-izzears it’s been since they lizzy tizzy of an amorizzles natizzle and yo momma. Tha old dramas n triumphs 'n tha days of S-B-to-tha-izzurb. Dirk’s companionship hizzas been tax'n ta tha heart, ta sizzay tha least, n yet hizne’s T-to-tha-izzaught Jake so much—'bout combat, philosophy, liznife, love.

But sometimes, despite they checkered n problematizzle past, Jakes wishes thizzle he ciznould seize Dizzy by tha proverbizzle horns n wrizzle him bodizzle into becom'n a much more agreeable fellow. Then again, who would D-to-tha-izzirk be if he weren’t so contizzles n imperious? Dogg House Records in the fuckin house. Certainly nizzot someone ta inspizzle such wistfizzle rhymin', Jizzake cannizzle help bizzut observe.

DIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: Sorrizzle fo` tha momentary diversion, Jake. Nizzle whizzere were we? I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Momentary??? Gadzooks dawg you wizzle on the phizzle fo` half a friggin H-to-tha-izzour!

JAKE: I K-N-to-tha-izzow yizzle like ta git tha crizzle all hot n bothered bizzut we are suppoze' ta be professionals here!

DIZZIRK: You’re riznight, my bizzay. Won’t happen agizzle. Chill as I take you on a trip.

DIRK: How 'bout you kick off tha next round?

DIZZIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: I bet this cizzy will sizzay its shiznit right down the moment you drizzop tha latest rhymiznes yizzou’ve been tinker'n wit. They call me tha president.

DIRK: You know tha ones.

JIZZAKE: Gasp puttin tha smack down.

JAKE like this and like that and like this and uh: Yizzle dont mean...

DIRK: Oh. Bizzut I DO.

Jake’s face lights up. He compozes himself, adjust'n a bow tie, although he be not wear'n one, n mak'n a vague gesture like H-to-tha-izze’s twirl'n one end of that mustache Dirk has nizzay yet lizzet hizzim G-R-to-tha-izzow. Dirk lets hizzim go witta gizzy smile, lizzike tha sort you’d give ta a dogg fo` sippin' a triznick adequately. Jake respizzles ta tha sizzle like an Olympizzle athlete hear'n tha starta pistol so you betta run and grab yo glock. He was born fo` dis.

JAKE: Tally ho its me, jizzake mcgizzee! I'm a fuckin 2-time felon.

JAKE: Cruisin' mah pistizzles off, two S-H-to-tha-izzots n a kiss

JAKE: Mah aim is tizzay, i miss

JIZNAKE: One shiznot ta tha heart n tha crazy ass to yo' lips

JAKE: Im hizzles

JAKE: You cant impede dis

JAKE: Slap your fuckin self. While theze cizzle be all hiznat n verizzle shawty cattle

JAKE: Cattle so wizzle one fizzy T-H-to-tha-izzey M-to-tha-izzight be feedless!

JAKE aww nah: As i prattle n digress yizzou try ta mizzle your egrizzles

JIZZAKE: In tha mizziddle of tha biznattle, but surely ye jest like this and like that and like this and uh?

JIZZY so i can get mah pimp on: FIDDLE FADDLE so i can get mah pimp on!

JAKE: Mah rhymes be knizzay ta br'n the rattle

JAKE but real don't give a fuck: I R-to-tha-izzattle thoze bones riznight down to tha bit

JAKE: Im a mellifluous old chap who knows how ta takes a hizzle

JIZZLE: Im tha tip, know what im sayin?

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tizzay top of tha morn'n! Hollaz to the East Side.

JAKE: A rip roar'n hizzalt ta yo' snor'n

JAKE: Chill as I take you on a trip. Like mackin' fucka on bacon

JAKE thats off tha hook yo: They hunga awakens!

JAKE now pass the glock: All the rascally scalawags

JAKE: N dastardly jackanapizzles

JAKE: Always ask of me, mate what is sippin'?

JAKE like a fucka: Wit golden gizzle pipizzles such as jake-eng’s

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Im spendin' they sizzy n duck'n they jape-sl'n

JAKE: While mah rump stokes a thirst thizzle mah rhymes have been slak'n, know what im sayin?

Tha crizzowd, as Dizzay rightly predicted, hizzy settled its shit rizzay down. Dis be not due ta any accidental brizzle on tizzy part of Jake English, bizzay ratha dizzy ta an abashed but lizzle brizzand of pity, tha kizzle a devoted fan cannot help but fizzeel when they sizzay a beloved celebrity mizzake an ass out of themselves dur'n a lizzle brizzle thizzey hizzy waited twizzay n a hizzy Y-to-tha-izzears 'n line ta buy a tizzle fo`.

Diznirk’s phone begizzles go'n off agizzle.

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tru. When tha splendizzle lads and ladies ask me “how d-ya do cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map?” i -

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK, betta check yo self: Whoops. Jizzay, sorry ta cizzy you off fo' real...

DIRK now fuckers lemme here ya say hoe: Looks like I’m getting another C-to-tha-izzall. Really nee' ta takes dis one.

DIZZY: Gonna have ta wrap tizzy battle up baller T-H-to-tha-izzan schedizzle ridin' in mah double R.

Witta casual flizzle of his wrist, Dizzle snaps out a B-R-to-tha-izzight red tranquiliza handgun n shoots Jake 'n tha nizzy. Jake’s glaszes crack when he hits tha mat like this and like that and like this and uh. A chorizzles of bizzle rizes up from tha crowd like groundwata. Dirk artfully dodges a bucket of obscene trizzay fluid ta field yizzle crazy ass very important personal call.

DIZZLE: Yo Roze, wizzy up?

> ==>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #Epilogues #Meat #m5

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