#so unless i start posting more of my notebook doodles like this i MIGHT not post art as often as before

[wtfforged]

i was supposed to post these ummm. whenever i did that poll eons ago. but then i didnt because i was ❤️ shy ❤️. so im dumping them all now

[failsafes-guardian]

Who is Charlotte - The Guardian (The Destiny 2 Concept, not the News Website)

Okay, now we're at least getting into the characters themselves. Feel free to skip this if you just want to read interactions between Charlotte and Failsafe (and sometimes Cayde) but if you want the backstory both IC and OOC for her, keep on reading.

Okay, first question, who is Charlotte? - Charlotte is my Hunter in Destiny 2, she is the Female Exo that I created in 2020 when I first started playing the game. Well, who is Charlotte, IC? - She's a Guardian! She does guardian things, like murder cabal and vex, go on raids and participate in vanguard activities! She's somewhat calculated in her actions but still able to come up with new plans on the fly if something goes wrong, she keeps emotionally distant unless she gets close to someone, she doesn't get her humanity. Wait what was that last one? - Ah yes, Charlotte, being an Exo, was once human, probably, she doesn't remember! She can't remember what her life before being an exo was, and commonly questions what it means to be human and what it means to be alive. On the more, fun side of her, she loves hand cannons and knives (being a blade barrage user and all), her favorite Exotic is The Ace of Spades (i'll get into how she got that later) and Outbreak Perfected comes in at a very close second. You might have noticed the icon for this blog is a failsafe based emblem and uh, not an exo face. That's because Charlotte never likes to remove her helmet. (As my friend called it, Robot Dysphoria) Her cloak (Memory of Cayde, i'll get there, don't worry) is also pretty much always on with the hood up as well, she likes it that way. Okay, okay, I'll get to the elephant in the room, what's the deal with Cayde in this blog? Cayde is still alive, the events of Forsaken simply did not happen despite a bunch of other stuff having happened past that, I'll probably try and make a full timeline later. How does Charlotte relate to Cayde? - Cayde trained Charlotte when she joined the Vanguard as a guardian, was he supposed to? Not really, but he took a liking to her style and decided to take her under his wing and show her how to get things done his way. This helped develop her own style, albeit with a lot of his personal techniques thrown in. Okay, so, how did Charlotte get The Ace of Spades and the Memory of Cayde cloak if Cayde is still alive and well? - Simple! He gave her the Ace of Spades as a gift for completing her first big Raid! Sure, he wasn't exactly excited to give it up, but he knew it was in good hands, and Charlotte has been proving him right ever since. Now, the cloak is a little different, He didn't give it to her, she had it made by Ada-1 as a way to always feel like Cayde was there. Even when he wasn't on comms to support her, she could always feel the cloak on her back and knew he was supporting her on her adventure. Okay, this post is getting really long, let me wrap it up with some quick little notes I've written down over the past like month. - She loves food, particularly ramen (thanks Cayde) and likes to take her few friends out to eat every now and again. - She has a notebook! She writes in it a lot, and sometimes does lil shitty doodles. - She got INTJ-A on that test that's like zodiac but for boys. - She likes going Solo on a lot of her missions, but works well enough with a team to get by on the big stuff. - Charlotte has no number designation (that anyone knows of, yet) Sorry for the long post, very long. I need to work on rambling less, but hopefully this is everything you'd want to know about Charlotte!

If not, I have an ask box! You can submit questions to me and i'll answer them! (provided they're relevant)

[rainbowsnsunnies]

Bullet Journal - Beginner Tips and my first bujo

A couple of days ago, I asked for tips from the tumblr bujo community for first-timers and little hacks that help with the overwhelm a newbie feels while starting their first bullet journal (the passive pressure to make your bullet journal eye-catching is unreal!). As always, the studyblr community and the bujo community here was super helpful and they gave me some amazing tips and advices. I thought of compiling it into a post for later reference and as a basic guide for someone who is just starting out and could do with some extra tips.

Don’t blindly follow spreads, customise them to fit your OWN needs, there’s no one-size-fits-all

Your first bujo will almost never look like the ones you see on Studyblr/Pinterest. Accept it, you’re just starting on the journey. You’ll get better with time

MAKE SPREADS THAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY GOING TO USE (this was repeated quite a few times, so I wanted to highlight this), the more spreads you abandon (like unnecessary habit trackers, or daily spreads when you really don’t have much day to day), the less likely you are to continue with the journal.

Have a pen you like and keep it along with the bujo always, this helps jot down quick notes and increases the chances of you using the journal

Don’t be afraid of changing things and spreads every now and then to suit your needs at the moment, it helps you find your style and keeps things fresh. This is also why it is necessary to not make too many months at once, you may not like the spread later and then you’ll be demotivated. Take it one month at a time.

You absolutely do NOT have to make it super artsy, make is as plain and minimal or as colourful and artsy as you like. Again, suit it to YOUR needs, don’t just ditto someone else’s spreads (unless it exactly suits your needs)

Feel free to get creative with washi tape/stickers if you like (Amazon is your best friend for stickers)

Pick one spread at a time and then keep adding one or two each month as you continue using the bullet journal so you don’t feel overwhelmed

Remember that functionality>>aesthetics, if its pretty but not useful to you, its not really an efficient planning system for you. If you just want to use it as a way to channel your inner artist and creativity, by all means, do it. But if your main purpose is to get organized and use it for planning, functionality should be your priority (bujo is supposed to make your life easier, not a task that you dread)

If you have the time, note down what you want to actually use the bullet journal for and what spreads will be useful to you. You can find loads of inspiration and help on Pinterest, Tumblr, Youtube, even Instagram! Don’t be shy to take some notes 🙂

Don’t over commit to ALWAYS have an aesthetic bujo. Some months you might find the time to decorate it, some months you might not. Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t make it aesthetic consistently

(Thank you to @baugloophows @boot-prints @dixeyray @obsidian-rain @ptowzapotato @mersari89 @dungeonsandfierceorangecats @lunarstudiesblog @nexusnai @space-clown-bitch-boi @smokee78 @abigmothinalittleworld @seekcoffeeandfindhappiness for the advices :) )

Here is my first bullet journal, if you want to see

I am using my old diary that a previous employer gifted me for my bullet journal since I'm just starting and don't want to spend a fortune in getting a new one (I went online to get a new one, and not gonna lie, for a community that claims to be super flexible and cheap and fit-your-own-needs, its kinda expensive, I'm sure there are cheaper planners at Target. But again, the system in itself does not ask you get a brand new expensive journal, even an old school notebook will do)

Now, I'm not an artist and in no way, am capable of sketching or doodling or drawing but since I had the time and energy to do it right now, I tried making an artsy cover page. It is inspired by lootengstudio on youtube. I really liked the idea of including butterflies since it symbolizes transformation and I am kind of undergoing a major transformation currently.

(like I said, I'm no artist, but I tried)

The second page I made was a monthly cover page, again, I tried to make one inspired by Pinterest but I'm quite sure I did not imitate it well enough (I mean its a penguin of its own kind and puts God's own creation to shame, hahaha)

The next spread I made is a 6 months or half yearly goals plan. I used to have yearly goals earlier and it has never worked out well for me since I tend to put off everything till the end of the year and then cram everything in the months of November-December and end up getting nothing done. So I'm hoping breaking the year in 2 will help me achieve more, but we will see how it goes. I'm not adding a picture of the spread here since it is quite personal.

Next, I drew a schedule page. As I'm studying from home these days, it does get quite hard to separate study time from rest times. So I broke down the day into hourly blocks and kind of, time-blocked my day (for the week). I'll repeat this spread every week, depending on how different my commitments are each week. (not sharing it again for personal reasons but here is an image from Pinterest so you can get an idea)

Is your bullet journal even a bullet journal if you don't have a habit tracker, haha. The next spread I made is a habit tracker, pretty basic with squares for each habit. Only thing I did different that I haven't really seen in any of the spreads online, is that I've put a countdown for 'strikes', that is the times I miss a particular habit. I've put 3 strikes, meaning I can mark a habit as done even if I have not for 3 times, since my days get super hectic somedays and I genuinely cannot find the time to do everything that day (like say I have an essay due and if I haven't been able to work on it, I may skip my night skin care routine and instead use the time to work on my essay) and it doesn't really mean I avoided or neglected the habit, its just that it was impossible to do it that day. So I have allowed myself 3 strikes (in total, and not 3 strikes for a single habit) after which, I'll leave the habit unmarked. (again, not sharing it for personal reasons, again, a picture from Pinterest so you can get a basic idea :) )

The last spread is a weekly/daily spread. Weight loss is a major goal of mine this year, so I want to track my weight and other parameters at the start of each week. I've included a little record of the numbers (and a 'eat take-out food' coupon to ensure I eat home made food most days of the week). I usually have a lot to do day-to-day, so I've made daily spreads. Its pretty basic, just a to-do list incorporated in the bujo.

I hope this post inspires you to start your own bullet journal and is helpful in beginning your journey.

Good luck!

[chibi-mushroom]

Hey everyone! Finally get to post my piece for the memory of promises zine! check out the link here if you want to grab one of your own copies in the leftover sale! I was so happy to be able to join in on this zine, and I hope you guys enjoy all the work that went into it! (Also keep in mind this was written before MoM.)

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Namine rubbed her temples and looked at the clock. Midnight already. DiZ was not going to like this. The next time he came into the white room would bring on some lecture or punishment of some kind. She had been working furiously all afternoon trying to get past this one section of memory, but there was something that was keeping her back. Her pulse began to race. She was feeling sick. The door to the white room opened and with a squeak, Namine ducked under the table, fearing the familiar stride of the man in red.

"It's okay, it's just me. You can come out now." A soft voice sounded in her ears. "You're safe. DiZ said he needed to run an errand and wouldn't be back for a couple of days."

Slowly looking up, Namine could see the outstretched hand of the only comfort she had in this lonely place. "Riku. You're back."

She took his offering and stood up. He hadn't let go of her hand just yet, blindfold still covering those beautiful blue green eyes he had. She was glad it stopped him from seeing things like her girlish blush. He was only offering his hand as a friend. Besides, it was wrong for her to want to be with him- nobodies weren't supposed to feel anything. So why did she?

"You're shaking." Riku stated simply. "Have you eaten anything today?"

So he could even feel the slight tremor in her hands. "No, not exactly."

"Do you want me to get something for you? I think there are some leftovers in the fridge."

"No, I'm alright. I have to get back to work." Namine tried to take her hand from his, but he held onto it all the tighter, leaning down a little to be at eye level with her. 

"You were working when I left, and I can tell you haven't gotten any sleep. How are you expecting to take care of Sora when you can't take care of yourself?"

Right. Namine thought. He's just like DiZ. All he cares about is getting Sora restored. You're just a tool.

Still, she couldn't help but notice the way her breath caught in her throat as his blinded eyes sunk to meet her tired ones. Maybe she should take a small break. All of this stress was making her read too much into small gestures.

Namine simply nodded, and Riku left to warm her up some food. Sensing that going back to Sora's memories would be futile, she grabbed her sketch pad and turned it to the very last page. This was her secret page, covered in things she thought about. Mindless doodles she drew when she was waiting for the computer to check on Sora’s physical well-being.

The sketch pad was not necessary for her magic to work. She could rearrange memories- crush the hearts of her poor unsuspecting victims- without it. She used it though to help her concentrate. By visualizing the memories, she was able to make a more convincing edit or capture the feelings that were hiding beneath the surface. So many times she had drawn Sora, Riku and Kairi together. And sure there were strong feelings of both love and jealousy, but had she not had her sketch pad, she might have missed Sora's emotions of gratitude for two stalwart best friends, confusion about school topics they had recently studied, and hope that Kairi would want to go with him to the first school dance, even though he knew they would just go together and bail early to hang out on the play island like they always did whenever the school had some social.

"Here you go. It's nothing special, but it's better than nothing." Riku interrupted her thoughts with a plate of food.

With a gasp, Namine hurried to cover her sketch pad. Even though she knew he couldn't see it, he moved so gracefully that she sometimes wondered if he really was blind. Although those first couple of days made the mansion quite a bit louder with his cries of annoyance as he bumped into furniture. He even fell into the secret compartment that hid the computer lab, but luckily managed to land safely.

"Drawing something you don't want anyone to see?" Riku smirked. 

"No!" Namine replied a bit sharper than she thought. "Maybe."

Riku laughed as he set their plates down and pulled a chair over. "I'm only kidding. You don't have to be working on Sora nonstop. If you want to take a moment for yourself, then do it."

"No, I need to be working on Sora. It was my fault he's like this in the first place. I want to keep my promise." Namine picked up the white plastic fork. For once would it hurt to have some color around here?

With a sigh, Riku held his hand out for her to hold. "We've been over this, Nam. What happened wasn't your fault. You were being used." Softly Riku muttered "you still are."

Namine looked at him for a moment and then looked down at her food. She picked at it for a few moments before softly sliding her hand in his and taking a couple of bites. She ate in a comfortable silence, simply feeling the pressure that came from the gentle touch. This sort of thing wasn't unusual for them. They could usually be found in silence with their hands connected. But the mountain of pressure from the recent block in memories and lack of self care was threatening to squish Namine with its enormous weight.

"How's the restoration going?" Riku asked.

Namine's stomach began to twist around itself. "I'm….not sure." 

Riku squeezed her hand, urging her to explain. Namine sighed, unsure of how to continue. Would he get mad if she told the truth? He had slowly been becoming more like DiZ, after all. He used to be there with her when she was getting told off. These days, Riku was never usually in the white room for more than five minutes unless it was late at night.

"You remember what Sora's mom used to tell him all the time, right?"  Riku recalled.

"Never talk to strangers on the play island?"

Riku chuckled, remembering a secret promise. "A problem shared is a problem halved. If you tell me, it might relieve some of the pressure on you."

There was no avoiding it, not as long as he held her hand. 

 "It's just that, well-" Namine fumbled for the words. "There's been a bit of a roadblock. I've been doing my best to sort it out, tracing the connections, but it's like the memories slip away as soon as I think I have a grasp on them. I may have gone through half a notebook trying to find a solid piece."

There was a pause, as if Riku were considering what to say. 

"I'll go get you a new notebook tomorrow, then. As for the memories, we'll get it figured out. You need to take a break, anyway."

"No!" Namine swallowed back further emotion. Maybe she really did need some sleep. She was being more irrational than she expected. "No, it's fine. I'm sure I'm doing something wrong."

"Don't say stuff like that. If there's anyone who can make this situation right, it's you. Please, just take a few hours to rest tomorrow, okay?" Riku squeezed her hand again.

"I don't really have a choice here, do I?" Namine sighed.

"You always have a choice. I'm just asking you as someone who cares a lot about you."

Someone who cares? Namine thought. She slowly nodded in reply. Maybe a break was exactly what she needed.

"Thank you, Riku."

One Year Later

Again Riku tried to beat Marluxia, and again he was defeated. He only had this last battle to finish, having started against the organization members he recognized or had personally fought against. Which, admittedly wasn't many, but after several attempts, he was down to the last. It frustrated him that he still wasn't quite used to the keyboard controls, and Sora's moves were much less based in strength and relied much more on magic. Riku had never been very good with magic, focusing on perfecting his cure and dark firaga spells instead of learning the large array of magic that his friends had mastered. 

Some keyblade master I turned out to be. Riku thought, sitting back in his seat and folding his arms. I can't even stop my two best friends from leaving me again. This is just like back then…

His mind began to drift away with thoughts of Castle Oblivion and Twilight Town. He heard the door open and gentle footsteps move toward him.

"Hey Aerith. We can work on that scarf in a minute. I have to get some more ethers for data Sora first."

"I take it the fight didn't go well then?" A soft voice walked closer.

He closed his eyes and shook his head. Not Aerith. 

"Hey Namine. How could you tell?"

Namine placed a hand on his shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. "You're really tense. Besides, I could feel your frustration from a block away."

What anger and annoyance had once plagued Riku's mind had since washed away. All he could register was how reassuring Namine's hand on his shoulder felt. She smelled nice, too. A faint blush warmed his cheeks. Ever since Kairi had insisted on going to sleep and Terra had left for the dark realm with Aqua and Ven, Namine was the only person Riku shared everything with. She had heard him vent several times, and she had been helping Aerith teach him how to knit. It was her delicate fingers that had lead him through the steps of a cable.

"I guess I need a little bit of a break." Riku said with a sigh. "Wanna go get some ice cream or something?"

"Sure." Namine smiled, stepping back so he could get up and stretch. They began to talk as they walked to their usual ice cream shop. 

Since Scrooge, Huey and Dewey had returned home, the ice cream shop had been manned by one of the local citizens. He usually gave Riku a discount, so Riku usually put some munny in the tip jar. It had become routine over the past year to go whenever Namine came to visit from Twilight Town.

"How is everything going with Roxas and Xion?" Riku asked, sitting down and unwrapping his fruit bar.

"Slow." Namine replied, taking a small lick from her chocolate cherry ice cream cone. She wanted to try all of the flavors, and this was the last one. "Not too bad, but I think I preferred the strawberry cheesecake the best."

"That was a flavor Kairi always liked." Riku smiled softly. 

When he saw the way Namine looked for just the hair of a second, he realized that was probably the wrong thing to say. He inwardly cursed himself and his inability to be the suave guy all the girls had thought he was growing up. Kairi and Namine didn't get much of a chance to talk after she got her replica body, as Kairi had almost immediately asked to be put under. Riku wondered what it was like living inside a heart of pure light. Just like Castle Oblivion, she didn't talk about it much.

"We should get some for her when she wakes up." Namine continued to eat her cone. There was an uncomfortable silence for just a moment before Namine spoke up again. "Who were you fighting when I came in?"

"Marluxia. He was the head of the castle, right?"

Namine nodded.

"I never really got to meet him as I was down in the basement back then. I'm sorry you had to deal with a guy like him."

"It's alright. I...had some support. There was Sora and Donald and Goofy. And despite everything I did to him, there was your replica, too." Namine spoke slowly, choosing her words with care. "But don't feel bad. He made his decisions, like everyone else."

This time, it was Riku's turn to nod in agreement, taking a bite from his treat.

"After the data battles are all said and done, what happens next?" Namine asked softly.

"I...don't know. All I know is that I've been having these weird dreams lately."

"I wondered. You look tired." Namine grabbed on to Riku's hand, intertwining their fingers.

Maybe it was a reflex, maybe it was a force of habit, like how they used to sit back in the old mansion. Either way, the touch on its own was enough to pull Riku away from the dark thoughts that usually sat at the horizon of his mind. He squeezed her hand in response.

"Don't hesitate to call me if you ever need someone to talk to. I miss our little midnight chats." Namine admitted.

"I do too." Riku smiled softly. "They really helped clear my mind back then."

"A problem shared is a problem halved, remember?" Namine was glad she could actually see his eyes as she recalled back to his words that helped her through her time at the old mansion. "Care to share anything?"

Riku paused. He sighed before starting to speak. After he told her of the recurring dream he'd been having with the buildings and the feeling of being watched, he also admitted to the weight that had been pinned on his shoulders. 

"I know it might sound silly, but I can't help but wonder if these dreams are connected to Sora somehow. I just wish I could understand it more." Riku finished his bar and set the popsicle stick on the bench beside him.

Namine had just finished her ice cream as well, wiping her face with the napkin. "Maybe it's time you take another journey."

"With the data battle still to fight and Kairi still asleep? I can't leave now."

"Maybe not now, but after the last battle is won." Namine gently pulled his hand close to her and began massaging it. "But that means I can't follow you. Will you be alright on your own? Maybe you can check Kairi's dreams."

"I...don't know. I haven't used my dream eater powers in a long time and the process is still kind of fuzzy for me." He could feel his muscles relax as she worked at his weary hand.

Doubt was rising in his chest. Maybe she was right. Who was he kidding? He wasn't ready for this kind of thing. He wasn't like Sora or Kairi who could follow their hearts at a moment's notice. He couldn't always feel the way it was trying to lead him.

But as he saw Namine patiently working on his hands, the stiff muscles being brought to relax against her fingers, a light shone through the storm of his doubt. How he hadn't realized it before was a mystery. Ever since they had met, she had been the light in the dark, just as he had provided shade for her in the brightest situations. As she finished the massage, she tenderly squeezed his hands, reassuring him that she was there and willing to help. Surely that was love.

He felt love for her, no question. But with Sora and Kairi gone and asleep, there never seemed to be a good moment to tell her what his heart really wanted to say. 

"We...we should be getting back." Namine sighed. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"No, but then, I'm not really all that sure of anything anymore."

"If there's anything I know, it's that things will get better. We'll find Sora. I don't know how or when, but we will." Namine took his hand again, standing before him.

Namine took a quick breath and then leaned over, placing a quick kiss atop his head. Ordinarily, she wouldn't be able to reach, but since he was sitting down, she could offer a small token of her affection and confidence in his abilities.

She and Riku's faces filled with blush, although a smile tugged at her lips. Namine didn't have enough courage to kiss him on the lips like she had wanted to for so long, but this was safe. He couldn't spurn her for a harmless kiss to the head. After all, what was some reassurance between friends?

"Thank you, Namine." Riku had a hard time looking at this angel of a woman without his heartbeat increasing.

To think she was willing to be by his side after all this. He decided there and then that he would listen to his heart and tell her of his feelings...after they set everything right. Once Sora and Kairi were home and together, then they could sort out their own relationship. It would give him yet another reason to bring his best friend home. 

He could still feel the kiss on his forehead, and it brought a genuine smile to his face. He stood up and began walking away from Merlin's house.

"Don't feel like you have to stop working on the data battles on my account. I just wanted to make sure you were doing alright." Namine stopped for a second.

"We can get back to those soon enough. I need a little longer before I get back into it." He took his trash and threw it into a nearby can. "There are some fountains that are really pretty this time of day nearby if you want to check them out with me."

A smile formed on Namine's lips. "I'd love to, Riku."

[hey-there-juliet]

Random Drabble Day (2/23)

Summary: First off, let me just say that this is more like a one-shot than a drabble because I'm a wordy bitch and I cannot control myself 😅

That said, I always had a hard time imagining Julie writing some of the Perfect Harmony's lyrics about herself, so I thought why not make this just another song that Luke and Julie wrote together? This is set somewhere between Finally Free and Edge of Great, in that week when Ray was stress-eating. This is supposed to fit back into the show at the end, so it might seem like a cliffhanger, but it's not.

Quick shout out to @jamestkirkish for betaing this for me! I love you and you are amazing! Any remaining mistakes are my own. And to the fabulous Sloan, for helping me out with Luke's handwriting! Enjoy 🧡

Fandom: Julie and the Phantoms

Relationship: Juke 💜

in the great scheme of life and ghosts

No matter how many times Luke insisted that she had been snooping through his things, Julie knew for a fact that she had done no such thing. In reality, she had simply been cleaning the studio when she came across it.

For three ghosts who didn't eat and could barely even touch anything most of the time, the boys sure knew how to make a mess. Every morning Julie would walk into the studio to find the chairs or coffee table rearranged, at least one of the rugs was always askew, and the clothes... the clothes were everywhere, and the worst part was: they reeked. 

And so every morning before leaving for school Julie would shoot them a stern look and tell them to pick up after themselves. Which they did - when she got back home, things were mostly in their rightful place. Still, every weekend Julie would make sure to take a moment away from homework and rehearsal to tidy the place up to perfection, just like her mom liked it. She'd dust off the furniture, water the plants, sweep the floor, and even vacuum the whole place. One Saturday when she was home alone (her dad photographing a wedding, and Carlos at a friend's house), she even went through the trouble of washing all of the guys' old clothes. 

Somehow, and she didn't even want to think about how that worked, the clothes didn't stink when they were actually wearing them, but at any other moment when they made no contact with their skin? Yeah... not good. So she washed them all (three times, using every trick and product she had). She washed them a fourth time for good measure and, by the time she was finished, any traces of twenty-five year old mold was gone, and so was the smell.

So no, she was not snooping - no matter what Luke said - when she came across the crumpled paper ball between the couch and the low cabinet, just behind a big vase her mom had gotten from tía Victoria.

Julie sighed, making a mental note to tell Luke to put his discarded ideas in the bin (again) if he didn't want them anymore, when one scribbled and wrinkled word caught her attention: Perfect Ha-

She bit her lip, staring down at the teasing word. Perfect what? Was it lyrics? Maybe half formed ideas? Doodles? Julie knew Luke liked to doodle in the margins of his notebook whenever he got stuck trying to come up with the next best piece of lyric or melody. She also knew she should probably just leave it alone, put it with his stuff to ask him later if he wanted to keep it, or put it in the garbage. Except the more she glanced down at that damn word, the stronger she felt it pull her towards uncovering whatever else the crumpled paper ball was hiding. 

In the end, the pull was too strong. She'd just take a quick look, make sure it wasn't anything important before she threw it away. And, she reasoned with herself, trying to squish the guilt that was making itself known in the pit of her stomach: Luke had gotten rid of it, so he clearly didn't care much for whatever was in there. 

Not able to resist any longer, Julie carefully unfolded the paper, slowly making her way towards the piano and using its surface as a table to help smooth the page over.

Luke's (horrendous) handwriting covered it with the bare bones of a song, random lines were scribbled in the margins with a couple of doodles for company, and even a little note from their bassist - ‘Reggie was here ;)’.

It took her a minute before the chicken scratches became words, and then Julie's breath left her in a rush, as the guilty feeling in her stomach turned into butterflies and flew away with her imagination. 

It was a song, parts of one, anyway, and - more importantly - it was a love song.

Unprompted, her own words came back to her, "Wow, Luke! I didn't know you were such a romantic." Quickly followed by Alex's short reply, "He's not."

She knew now who Unsaid Emily was really about, but these new words were clearly about a different kind of love. The romantic kind, and Julie couldn't help letting herself believe - just for a moment - that the song might be about her.

Before she could let herself be carried away in a daydream, there was a - now familiar - shift in the air, a sound almost like static, the only thing letting her know of a ghost's appearance. Without a thought, she crumpled the page again and shoved the paper ball in her pocket for later inspection. 

"Hey, Julie!" Reggie's cheerful greeting sounded across the studio from where he had poofed in, and soon - with his "help," bless him - Julie was finished with her weekend clean up. 

As if summoned by the end of her chores, Luke poofed in, ready to rehearse. Alex soon followed; and by the time Julie retired for the night, the song had been almost forgotten where it hid inside her pocket. 

Almost.

***

After getting ready for the night, Julie settled on her bed with the wrinkled page and her dreambox. She read over the words again and again, imagining they were about her.

Step into my world, 

Bittersweet love story about a girl 

Shook me to the core 

Voice like an angel, 

I've never heard before, 

- 

You and me together, it's more than chemistry 

- 

Love me as I am 

I hold your music 

Here inside my hands 

- 

You are my brightest burning star 

- 

We create Perfect Harmony.

And unless Luke had been singing with another girl, there didn't seem to be many options on who it could be about, right?

From the beginning, Julie had felt something connecting her to him; to all of them, in different ways. But Luke had been the one to give her a little piece of his soul right after meeting her when he let her use Bright to earn back her spot in the music program. Seeing his passion reflecting back on her, the way he treated music like she used to, made her miss it more than anything for the first time in almost a year. It made her miss the way it felt to use music to connect with her mom.

After they spent a whole weekend finishing each other's songs and working on new ones, getting to know each other's inner workings - the part of them that bled out feelings into paper to create beautiful melodies, Julie knew she was a goner. Finding out he'd been the one to write the words that shaped her taste in rock certainly didn't help. Like he'd been helping her find her way to music long before they even met.

Her crush on him had been inevitable from the start, and while falling for him was probably one of the worst things she could’ve done, it was too late to stop it. She'd been free falling for a while, and hopefully she'd land in his arms soon enough. Reading over his words again gave Julie a warm fluttering in her stomach that made her think he was more than ready to catch her once she reached the ground. 

Carefully folding the piece of paper, she put it inside her dreambox, then placed the box back on the shelf.

***

The following week went by without any hiccups. Every once in a while, Julie would remember Luke's song and a familiar warmth would fill her up, leaving a soft smile on her lips and glazed eyes staring off at nothing. Just as often, Flynn would have to shake her out of her daydreams.

She didn't think much would come of it until her dad decided to throw the band a party so he could film them and post their video on YouTube. Which was fine. Amazing, even. It was most certainly great! Until Luke came to the school, staring at her with his stupid, beautiful, awed eyes, and with his soft, perfect smile, saying things that made her combust and melt, all at the same time.

"I think you make me a better writer." 

    "I think we make each other better."

Calling Nick 'Luke' was bad enough, but slipping into a complete musical sequence as she danced with him? "Goner" didn't even begin to describe her. 

Like the other times they'd written together, the lyrics flowed through her, finishing the song he'd started with the same ease as one would take a breath.

Julie knew that whatever was going on between her and Luke couldn't happen or, if it did, it couldn't last. In fact, in the great scheme of life and ghosts, she didn't know much, but what she did know was that - be it in life or in death - love was constant. 

He didn't need to have a heartbeat or to be able to touch her for her to love him. He was just as real to her as the next person, and whether it would hurt in the long run or not, it didn't matter. 

She knew Flynn was only looking out for her, but that ship had sailed, and Julie was already so lost in his ocean eyes that avoiding eye contact wasn't going to bring it back. She would entertain her though, even knowing it wouldn't work. Just like the tide, eventually he'd pull her right back in.

She could love him just as he was, for however long they had together, and especially after that.

-

End notes: I hope you guys enjoyed it! And, if you'll notice, at the beginning it kind of gives off the impression that Luke eventually finds out about the song and Julie tells him how she found it. Which may or may not lead you to believe that they're in a relationship. I guess it all depends on interpretation though ;)

Oh, also! Shout out to the chaos squad folks that guessed right! You guys are no fun :( /j lmao

[obeiii-mee]

Hi there! If its okay, could i ask for headcannons of the brothers finding out MC is an Artist? Something like, finding there sketchbook or napkins w doodles on them jfjdjs Or maybe they catch MC glancing at them alot while trying to draw them? hfjd Ty!! Your writing is really good~

Of course it’s OK! I’ve always liked the idea of MC having a really interesting hobby and teaching the brothers about it. I feel like all the brothers would be very supportive of them, even if they all had various reactions to their hobby but I really love writing wholesome moments like that. Sorry this took longer to come out, I made them really long to make up for it!

Also thank you. Your compliment means a lot :)

————————————-

The Brothers’ reactions to MC being an artist:

Lucifer:

-Well if you’re going to glance at him every two minutes, he’s bound to notice

-I mean, you’re pretty damn obvious

-Lucifer got pretty used to you whipping out your sketchbook whenever you could

-So for you to start doodling in his office while he worked wasn’t exactly unheard of

-He caught you staring at him before looking back down at your drawing, continuing your series of furious scribbles

-Now you piqued his interest

-“You seem very focused there love. What are you drawing?”

-Scared the crap out of you because he rarely ever talks when he’s working

-You were reluctant to show him but Lucifer has his insisting face on

-When you passed him the sketchbook, he momentarily froze

-Your drawing was so detailed and full of emotion, capturing him slumped over his desk, exhausted but determined to finish the work he’s been assigned

-He was so surprised and stunned, for a second, he forgot to breathe

-“It’s not exactly one of my best drawings yet but-“

-“You never fail to impress me MC.”

-He suspected you were drawing him but he wasn’t expecting this much effort to be put into it

-He would definitely keep all your drawings of him

-Loves all your work but secretly adores your sketches of him best

-Lucifer would occasionally look over your shoulder while you sketch, taking a peek at what you’re drawing and smile to himself

-He’s never felt this much pride for someone else before

Mammon:

-Was pissed you would rather spend time with an object rather than him

-It annoyed him at first because he couldn’t tell if you were listening to him or not while you had your nose stuck in your sketchbook

-Basically, he was jealous of a sketchbook

-You can’t do that Mammon, that’s Levi’s thing

-So one day he decided to see what the fuck was so great about that giant notebook you always have with you

-He turned your entire room upside down searching for the damn thing before finding it

-He flipped through it and I’m sure the entire House of Lamentation could hear his gasp

-You drew him for pages and pages in all sorts of positions and styles and he was a flustered tomato going through them

-You willingly drew him? The scum of a demon who could never do anything right unless it involved money? You put your time and effort into these sketches and doodles despite him being condescending and a dick at times?

-Excuse me but this man is already head over heels in love with you, you can’t keep giving him reasons to fall for you

-He was so engrossed into your work that he didn’t notice you behind him

-“Mammon why is there a mess in my room-“

-“HOLY SHI-AHHH!!!”

-Too embarrassed to even think of an excuse for going through your shit

-“Ah those...I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have drawn you without your permission Mammon-“

-“Are ya kiddin’ me? MC, I feel insulted that you didn’t tell me about this sooner. Can...Can I keep some of ‘em??”

-Now he insists that you draw him as often as possible and would even pose for you (he loves the attention let’s be real)

-He wants to see all of your drawings and will endlessly support you

-Thought about using your skill as a way to make money because art can be very expensive

-But in the end, he dropped the idea

-Why would he sell something so precious to him??

Levi:

-He probably has a sketchbook too

-You guys draw Ruri-chan together in your own styles

-Levi always insists that you’re much better at drawing than him tho

-Your talent makes him a little jealous but at the same time he’s fascinated

-Was so surprised when he found out you were into sketching

-Levi was even more surprised when you showed him all the drawings you’ve worked on for your favourite anime and video game characters

-OK but how come you’re so perfect? Not only are you a lovely person that is willing to watch anime with him without insulting his opinions but you can draw? W...h...a...t...?

-He requests several sketches of ‘The Tale of the Seven Lords’ characters and will actually tape them to his wall

-Some of them are right on his Ruri-chan shelf

-“Hey normie, do you...do you mind teaching me how to draw? I want to learn.”

-Is 100% determined to learn how to properly sketch from you

-You started drawing him as well, usually while he games

-You better stop, he’ll have a nosebleed if you keep being so nice to him!

-Draw him as an anime character and he will start fangirling

-“Phew. OK I’m finished.”

-“What did you draw?”

-“Hentai.”

-“This. Is. A. Masterpiece.”

-Will proudly show your work to his brothers (usually the same drawing more than five times)

-What did an otaku like him do to deserve you??

Satan:

-He found out you were an artist fairly quickly

-I meant he found tissues with doodles you left behind everywhere

-He kept all of them

-It was so refreshing for him to see you so invested in your drawings the same way he is in his reading

-You’re still under the impression you’re being sneaky by drawing him while he has his nose in his books

-You ended up finally gathering enough courage to show him one of your portraits of him

-He had a reaction similar to Lucifer’s really

-Praise!

-He made your drawing into a bookmark

-Idk how but he did

-You leave him a few doodles of you and him being all lovey dovey and he absolutely adores them

-Will lose his marbles if anyone says anything remotely negative about your style or talent

-Draw him fluffy animals pls he will literally have them framed and fixed up in his room

-Also if you draw any of his brothers (specifically Lucifer let’s be real) in a silly way he will actually start snorting with laughter

-You sketch him pretty damn often and he can’t really complain

-It’s really peaceful when you two are in the library and you’re working on your doodling while he reads aloud to you

-Buys you equipment like pens and pencils and even sketchbooks when he knows you’re running out

-He’s really delighted when you come over to show him your drawings

-Once he caught you staring at a cat as you started sketching it

-He actually didn’t think it was possible to love someone this much

Asmo:

-Noisy little fucker that he is and in need of drama, he looked through your sketchbook

-Thought it was a diary at first but nope

-Imagine his surprise when he found pages upon pages of drawings of his brothers and him

-Except his weren’t really a surprise

-He’s gorgeous of course you would want to draw him

-But oh my God, do you realise how much he values art??

-I know he looks as if he only thinks about sex but he definitely has a thing for creativity and art like painting and photography

-“MC darliiiing~? Why didn’t you tell me you can draw?”

-He actually shrieks at how well you’ve captured his beauty

-He insists that they look like actual pictures of him

-Takes several pictures of all of them and posts them on DevilGram

-A bit salty when you drawing anything else but him

-However, he can’t deny that you’re one of the most talented individuals he ever met

-He comes up to you every day and lractically begs you to draw him

-One time you came in your room to find him naked and asking you to draw him

-Is actually kinda good at drawing himself

-Specifically people

-He has enough experience exploring the human body so he surprisingly enough, knows a thing or two when it comes to body proportions

-“MC draw me like one of your french girls~”

-I’m sorry I had to do that

-He also likes the attention he’s getting when he poses for you

-He may think he’s the most beautiful being in all three realms but he definitely thinks you’re the second

-So he often offers to draw you too

-He likes having cozy chats with you while you draw

Beel:

-You left your sketchbook behind in the kitchen with him

-Mammon needed your assistance to get down from where Lucifer hanged him after one of his failed money schemes

-He knocked a glass of milk nearby it and had a panic attack for a minute

-Legitimately thought he ruined the whole thing

-Was actually about ready to cry because he knew how important your sketchbook was to you

-Looked through it just to make sure there were no splotches or anything

-To say he was relieved when he realised it was fine would be an understatement

-He was kinda drawn to your sketches, most of them carefully drawn and expressive, even some of the ones you scribbled out

-One specific drawing caught his eye though

-You drew him and Belphie together, with his twin brother’s head resting on his shoulder while Beel ate

-He was mesmerised by your talent and by your thoughtfulness

-Beel felt bad about it but he kept looking through your sketches, enchanted by everything in it

-You drew him and his brothers several times

-It’s safe to say the discovery of your drawings brightened his day

-Gave back your sketchbook later

-He apologised for going through it without your permission more than he needed to

-You had to accept his apology because he looked like a kicked puppy

-Feels very honoured whenever you let him look at your work

-Is more than happy to pose for you!

-But that might be a bit of a problem seeing as he tends to move around a lot

-“Whoa, that looks just like me! The food I’m eating looks really realistic too...which is making me hungry. Let’s go to Hell’s Kitchen, you can finish this there!”

-Supportive bean

-You gave him a family sketch of him and all of his brothers once

-Normally, he only likes gifts he can eat

-But he treasures that drawing more than food at times

-“This...this is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me! Thank you MC! But uh, someone’s missing in this drawing.”

-“Ah shit, who did I miss?”

-“You.”

-If anything ever happens to Beel or his happiness I swear to Lord Diavolo-

Belphie:

-OK but you left your notebook just sitting there right next to him???

-How do you expect him not to look through it?

-Belphie doesn’t care much for privacy

-And he doesn’t exactly have morals either

-He didn’t even know you were into drawing

-Which to be fair, wasn’t scandalous considering he sleeps 20 hours a day

-But he wants to be more involved in your interests so that’s why he took initiative with your sketchbook

-Idk what he was expecting but definitely not a sketch of him staring back at him

-His heart skipped a beat but I don’t even know if demons have hearts

-The cheeky little shit took pictures and may or may not have made on your drawings of him his wallpaper

-Most of the drawings were of him sleeping, surprising...absolutely no one

-“So that’s what you’re up to whenever I go to sleep huh? So cute~”

-But besides all that, he is really touched

-I mean, if there’s anyone undeserving of your love and respect is the piece of shit of who tried to kill you

-Yet here you are, continuously showering him with affection and now this

-Probably spent hours looking at your sketchbook while you were at R.A.D

-Didn’t say anything to you when you came back except handing your notebook back to you

-Though he was less of a smartass and more affectionate for the rest of the day

-Next morning, you took the liberty of waking up before him and sketching him again

-He grabbed your arm halfway through your doodling and grinned at you from under the covers

-“Drawing me again huh? You won’t mind me doing this while you’re at it then right?”

-Now he’s sleeping in your lap

-Whenever you show him your work, he makes a small approving noise but he’s seriously impressed

-Draw Lucifer or Lord Diavolo in any offensive manner and he will actually start giggling

-Gets all huffy puffy when you draw his brothers instead of him (we all know Beel is the exception)

-I may have a thing for Belphegour

Al~

[donttouchmeimwriting]

Argo ch. 3

Friday the 13th - Friendship/Romance - Jason Voorhees/OC M/M ship

2983 words, 3rd person POV

I'm just as surprised as you are that I'm cranking these out so fast. Thanks, NaNoWriMo!

Cross-posting on FFN under PyroTheWereCat

...

...

Saturday dragged so sluggishly for Jason as he waited impatiently to visit Lijah again. He spent the day stalking the outskirts of the camp, trying to watch Lijah as he worked. He was fascinated by Lijah's effect on others; it was clearly shown that it wasn't just Jason who was compelled to change behavior simply by listening to him. The kids loved him, and he was popular with the other counselors as well. Jason caught himself daydreaming a few too many times of being one of them and being able to spend the day with Lijah out in the open like they could.

During one of these moments, Jason stared off across the surface of the lake, the sunlight sparkling across the ripples in the water. He wondered what would have happened over a decade ago if Lijah had been at the camp with him...would the other kids have been enraptured by his presence and listened to him then? Would Jason and Lijah have become friends as quickly as children as they had as adults? Or was it their personal experiences that drew them together now and they were all the better for it?

"Enjoying the view?"

Jason spun to face the speaker, relieved it was only Lijah. Lijah laughed at his reaction and looked out across the lake to see what Jason was seeing.

"It is gorgeous out here, isn't it?" he sighed, his expression dreamy, "I've worked at a few different camps over the years but I think Crystal Lake is my favorite."

Jason's heart still pounded in his chest, despite the surprise having worn off. Why was he so nervous to stand here next to Lijah like this? Did the others feel this way around him too?

"Oh, hey!" Lijah said suddenly, pointing down at the nearest dock where two campers and another counselor stood, "That's Terry and Kira over there with Julie. Kira was bullying Terry since day one of camp, saying she looked ratty and pushing her down - you know, stupid kid insults like that. Terry didn't want to be a tattletale, so she wouldn't say who was picking on her, even though we all knew. The director has a rule that we can't interfere unless the kids come forward so we were stuck for a little while. The other counselors and I came up with a detective game to make Kira realize she was doing something wrong and hurtful and she came forward on her own yesterday to admit it. She's been doing great today at making up with Terry and I think they'll be friends really soon. It's so cool what a little positive reinforcement can do."

Lijah crossed his arms over his chest and gazed proudly out at the two kids, but Jason couldn't stop staring at Lijah. What was it he was feeling right now? Impressed at his ability to handle bullies in a way that the counselors when he was a child never could, certainly, but what else? What was it about Lijah that made Jason want to throw his machete in the lake and never hurt anyone again?

"What's up?" Lijah asked, noticing Jason staring at him, "Did I say something wrong?"

Jason shook his head, but could not tear his eyes away. Lijah had his hair tied back today, pulling it off of his neck and away from his face. There was sweat around his hairline, sticking strands of hair to him in tiny swirls and lines. His freckles were more pronounced in the daylight, and his tanned skin almost glowed, even in the shade of the trees. To Jason, this view was much more appealing than the lake.

"Alrighty then," Lijah said, shrugging it off, "Anyway, I just wanted to say hi since I saw you hanging around up here, but I gotta get back to my group. I'm seeing you tonight, right?"

Jason nodded fervently, excited by every second he got to spend with Lijah. Lijah smiled broadly and waved as he set off back to the camp.

"See you later, Jase!" he called.

Jason gave a small wave back, his stomach full of butterflies. He decided he didn't care why he was feeling this way or what it was about Lijah he liked so much. He felt immeasurably and inexplicably happy for the first time in a long time and he didn't want to overthink it. After all, wasn't that what his mother wanted for him?

-------------------------------------------------

Jason returned to cabin 5 that evening a little earlier than planned. The sun had set, but the sky was still relatively light and the camp was winding down from the day. Jason looked through the bedroom window, but Lijah was not in there yet. He tested the window to see if it was unlocked, and to his luck, it was. He checked his surroundings to ensure no one would see him struggle to squeeze through the narrow opening. It was embarrassing enough that Lijah had to see it last night. The coast was clear, so Jason pushed himself into the bedroom, nearly getting stuck in the process. Once inside, he straightened up and closed the window so bugs would not get in. It struck him as he looked around that he was in Lijah's private room alone.

A little snooping couldn't hurt, right? Jason allowed his eagerness to drive his actions as he explored Lijah's room. He first looked in the dresser drawers to see what other clothes Lijah had besides his work shirts and shorts. From the brief snoop, it seemed that Lijah liked light, muted colors and pants with deep pockets. He also seemed to be a fan of chunky bracelets and wristbands, probably to camouflage and support his delicate wrists.

From there, Jason moved to the books on top of the dresser. Adventure novels, a couple college textbooks in the subjects Lijah had specified as his course of study, some notebooks, including the one Jason had used to communicate with last night, and one romance, all paperbacks that looked well used. Curious about the romance novel, Jason flipped through the pages. Mother never had these kinds of books at home, so he wasn't sure what to expect. His eyes fell upon a passage that described a kiss between the heroine and her strapping, yet emotionally manipulative love interest:

"...her cerulean orbs meeting his stormy grey ones in a passionate stare before their lips collided in a kiss so fiery, so full of desire, it would warm the hardened coals of even Wyatt's darkened heart. Charlie swooned into his massive arms, surrendering herself to his rough touch. Wyatt growled into the kiss, his stubble scratchy against her smooth face, but not unbearable. He gripped the back of her neck possessively, but Charlie knew it was part of his insecurity in that he never wanted to let her go. Funny, she thought before the intensity of the kiss forced her mind to become a blank slate of ecstasy, He won't talk about his abandonment issues, but I can feel them here in his kiss..."

Jason set the book down, frowning. Did Lijah really see himself in this Wyatt character? It didn't seem right, but it probably wasn't important. Jason turned instead to the notebooks, but they were mostly blank aside from sparse doodles, camp schedules, and Jason's shaky handwriting. He put the notebooks back where they were and opened the door to the rest of the cabin.

Across from this door was the door to the bathroom, but Jason didn't need that at the moment, so he ignored it and proceeded left down a short hallway to the living area. The hallway opened up to a tiny kitchen and dinette on the right and an ancient, faded couch with a rickety coffee table and an old antenna TV and VCR atop it. This area was not as bright and full of Lijah's personality as the bedroom was, but Jason figured that was to be expected. His own bedroom at home was a reflection of what few interests and hobbies he had. The bedroom was a sanctuary for the individual, and held a piece of their soul. At least, that's what a bedroom should be. Mother had told Jason all about the filthy, lecherous activities young people would get up to in bedrooms. Only a married couple should share a bed, she had told him. It was a sin otherwise.

Feeling slightly hungry, Jason made for the short refrigerator, needing to squat down to see its contents. A couple sandwiches wrapped in plastic occupied one shelf with a handful of apples on the lower shelf, some cans of soda on the door. Jason reached for one of each, hoping to finish them before Lijah returned to avoid accidentally showing him his face. He brought the food to the couch and sat down, his weight causing the seat to sink lower than it was meant to. He removed his mask and devoured the sandwich and apple as quickly as he could, feeling somewhat like a ravenous raccoon. He cracked open the soda can and chugged it, realizing too late that it was a bad idea to drink a carbonated beverage so fast. Bubbles surged up through his nose and he sputtered, covering his face so he did not spray soda everywhere. He coughed and gagged, but the feeling soon went away. He made a mental note to drink anything bubbly as slow as possible, but preferred the idea of never having soda again. It was too sweet for him anyway.

Finished with the meal, Jason located a small trash can at one end of the kitchen and disposed of the remains. He pulled his mask back on just as he heard the front door to the cabin open. He tensed, preparing for a fight, but it was Lijah, alone, who gave a start upon seeing Jason's towering figure in his living room.

"Oh gosh, you got me again!" he cried out, laughing nervously, "You're here early."

Jason nodded once and watched as Lijah locked up and set down the pack he was carrying near the door.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, a tiredness in his voice that worried Jason. Would he be able to stay up tonight? Did he stay up too late last night? Jason shook his head and pointed to the refrigerator, silently telling Lijah he had found the food. Lijah yawned.

"Oh, good," he said, shuffling towards the bedroom, "Sorry, I'm a little worn out from today. We can still hang out, but I might crash a little earlier than last night if that's okay."

Jason nodded and followed him. Lijah turned to the dresser and tilted his head at the stack of books.

"You checked out the romance novel?" he asked, disbelief in his voice, "Huh, didn't see that one coming. It's not very good, but it was free, so I figured why not, y'know?"

So Lijah didn't choose that book for the plot, Jason realized. That made much more sense. Lijah opened the drawers and retrieved a stack of clothes, brushing by Jason to head to the bathroom.

"You can relax in the bedroom if you want for about fifteen minutes while I shower," he said, stifling another yawn, "I'll try to get my bedtime routine done quick so we have some time together."

Jason had no problem with waiting for him to prepare for bed. He was happy just to be in the same building with him and not anxiously wonder where he was like before. Jason sat on the edge of the bed, having grabbed the notebook and pencil he'd used yesterday in preparation for the conversation he would be having tonight. He heard the shower turn on in the bathroom, and an unwelcome thought of what Lijah looked like in there sprung into Jason's mind. Startled by this, Jason shook himself. What was he thinking? His mother's warning about college aged young adults surfaced and he wondered, horrified, if these thoughts would consume his brain like the counselors he'd killed or if he could fight them and keep his head clear and pure. What would happen to him if he couldn't get rid of them?

Jason struggled with this fear until the sound of the water stopped and he heard Lijah moving around in the bathroom. He squeezed the edges of the notebook to ground himself. What would Mother say if she knew what he was thinking about? Realistically, she would probably forbid him from coming back here and have him read Bible passages until the thoughts went away. Mother knew what was best for Jason.

Lijah entered the room once he was done in the bathroom, his hair still damp and his cheeks slightly flushed from the steam. He wore a loose fitting navy blue t-shirt with an unfamiliar logo on the chest and green plaid boxers. He brought with him a wonderful, clean scent of shampoo and mint flavored toothpaste. Jason wrote on a fresh page of the notebook,

"feel better?"

Lijah hummed in agreement, stretching his arms over his head until his shoulders softly popped.

"Nothing like a hot shower to take the day off and get you ready for bed," he said, climbing up onto the mattress next to Jason, "How's your day been?"

Jason thought about it, but didn't want to be too honest that he had pretty much just been waiting all day for this meeting. He wrote,

"did alot of walking. liked what u said about the bully. ur really good with kids."

Lijah waved him off modestly.

"Aw, that wasn't just me," he replied sheepishly, "I can't take all the credit. All of us counselors worked together on that. They're a good group of people. I'm glad I got the chance to work with them."

Jason tilted his head to one side, his interest piqued by this statement. So all the counselors were good, not just Lijah? Would Jason even need to kill anyone this year, or had the nightmare of wicked counselors finally ended? He wondered what his life would become if he didn't come here to kill every summer. It would probably be much like last year, quiet and content with his mother, having everything they needed and just going day to day, living the life she built for them. But Jason knew he couldn't live that life now. He wanted his life to include his new friend, and he wasn't sure how he could do that, with Lijah going back to college at the end of the summer and moving into an apartment somewhere probably far away.

Lijah tilted his head to mirror Jason and catch his attention.

"What's on your mind, big guy?" he asked. Jason considered his next few words and decided to avoid the topic. He wrote,

"u said u had a sister rite? tell me about her?"

Lijah's entire face lit up with a huge smile and his joy was so infectious, Jason couldn't resist matching the expression.

"Phoebe!" he exclaimed, "She's the best little sister anyone could hope for. We're thirteen years apart, so I'm pretty protective of her, and it was really hard for me to go away to college and leave her behind. I call home once a week and send her letters every month of cool stuff I've learned or seen. She likes bugs and dolls and dinosaurs. Our parents won't let her see Jurassic Park though - that's a scary movie about dinosaurs - but I think she can handle it. She's a tough kid. Definitely way tougher than I was at her age. I used to get beat up in school for being, uh, different."

Jason felt a surge of protectiveness for Lijah, though he didn't know who had hurt him. How could anyone even want to hurt someone like Lijah? He curled his fingers into the bedspread, fists shaking with anger. Lijah noticed and addressed it,

"Hey, it was years ago; don't worry about it! Besides, I'm a lover, not a fighter. I'd rather solve my problems with communication than violence."

Jason nodded and forced himself to relax. What was he going to do anyway? Find the bullies and kill them even though they probably haven't been anywhere near Lijah in years? Stupid. Jason tried to explain his thoughts by writing,

"sorry bullies make me real mad. i got bullied to."

Lijah offered a sympathetic look. He moved a hand towards Jason, but rethought the action and stopped, biting his lip.

"I bet they wouldn't mess with you now though!" he said instead, trying to look at the bright side, "I bet they'd take one look at how tall and muscular you got and run away. The machete helps too."

Jason grimaced under the mask. That probably wouldn't be the only reason they ran away...Still, Lijah meant well and he couldn't blame him for trying. It was more effort than anyone had put in before, and that was worth something.

-------------------------------------------------

The conversation continued for a short while, but Lijah soon began nodding off. In one of their quiet moments, Jason looked over and saw Lijah slumped on his pillows, sound asleep. Jason sighed and took that as his cue to leave. He rose from the bed and set down the notebook on the dresser. He looked back at Lijah, bemused by his awkwardly scrunched limbs and his face pressed unflatteringly into the pillows, before turning off the light and leaving through the window to let him sleep.

It was moments like these that Jason was beginning to dislike his heightened energy levels during night time. It worked great for serial killing, but not so much for spending time with a friend. But he was beginning to have a hope and some confidence that things would work out and that he and Lijah would find some sort of rhythm together.

[venusinmyrrh]

@shimmerge​ asked:

What are some ways you chose to honor or work with Jupiter if you do? I'm limited in my ability to do rituals and wanted to try to do smth for this Thursday since Jupiter is in my sign that day

Doing work on Thursday is a great idea, since that’s Jupiter’s day! Jupiter is the planet of expansion, prosperity, and abundance - many people think of Venus as the money planet, but Jupiter is actually the most ideal for bringing in a steady flow of ever-increasing cash. And while Mercury may be the perfect road-opener to create new opportunities, Jupiter is the one that will make sure those opportunities keep paying off.

Some basic stuff: Jupiter’s color is blue, its traditional number is 4, and its glyph looks like this. Some herbs associated with Jupiter that might be easy to find depending on where you live are dandelion, honeysuckle, and sage. Jupiterian stones are anything blue (especially sugilite and sapphire) so even if you have glass beads or fake stones, as long as they’re blue, go for it! No need for fancy rocks that cost a fortune or take up space.

Things to Do (under the cut)

Wear blue: Jupiter is known for his kingship, and what better way to honor the king than to wear his colors? If you don’t have any blue clothes, then blue nail polish, blue jewelry, or even blue lipstick can be a great way to carry his power around with you all day. For maximum effect, combine it with gold for wealth, green for money, or orange for opportunity (associated with Mercury!)

Light a blue or white candle: This is a pretty easy one as well, if you have access to both candles and fire. Carve something into it, rub it down with oil, roll it in herbs, whatever you like - or just sit gazing into the flames, the way humans have done for hundreds of thousands of years. (We are all part of something bigger than ourselves.)

Meditate: This would be a great thing to do while your candle is lit, especially if you don’t want to leave it unattended (which you should never do anyway unless it’s in a jar AND you’ve taken extra precautions!) Sit quietly somewhere you won’t be disturbed and visualize yourself having everything you want as if you already have it. What is your life like? What do you do each day? How does it make you feel? Now backtrack: visualize how you got there. See how one thing led to another which led to another, taking you all the way from where you are now to where you want to be. Feel proud of yourself! Allow yourself to be sure that things will happen just this way.

Draw a sigil: My sigil formula is symbol that reminds me what I’m trying to achieve + symbol of a thing that can help me achieve it. Trying to get more money? Doodle the glyph for Jupiter combined with a dollar sign until you come up with a design that looks nice, and there you are. Draw it in a notebook, tear it out, and hang it up. Carve it into a candle with a penknife or a paper clip. Draw it in black sharpie on something that is also black. Paint it with water on a window or a door. Draw it on an index card to put in your wallet (very appropriate for Jupiter!) Don’t like designing? Just use the symbol linked above - the important thing is that you’re making a mark with intention.

Write a petition: Write down what you want in the present tense, as if you already have it. “I am wealthy, with no financial worries for the future. I have more than enough money to buy clothes and go to restaurants. I fly first class when I travel, which I do often.” Get into detail! Be descriptive and passionate. Many people become so overwhelmed with emotion at this part that they start to cry, and that’s a good thing. When you’re finished, take the paper and burn it, bury it, throw it into running water, tear it up and throw it off a cliff, whatever. Just put it out into the universe and out of your mind, so it can do its work.

Make a vision board: Jupiter is a big, big thinker, so make something that depicts your long-term goals and your wildest dreams. It’s best to do this with your hands, as in a physical collage, but pinterest boards and tumblr aesthetics work too! The important thing is that you don’t limit yourself in your vision. Your goals are more realistic than you think.

Make big plans: You know that thing you’ve always said you were going to do? Commit to it now! Buy the guitar you’ve always been meaning to learn to play, make that big painting you’ve been thinking of for a while now, or call up your old college friend and tell them you’re planning on visiting next year. The first step is often the biggest and hardest one to take, so once that’s out of the way, the rest of the details will become a lot easier to sort out.

Do something generous: True kingship is stewardship. If there is something you have an abundance of, whether it’s time, knowledge, patience, or skill, consider giving some to a person who could use it, just to help them out. When we are generous with the world around us, we express our trust that the world will be generous with us in return.

Cook with butter or eat something deliciously fatty: Be generous with yourself too! Jupiter is not stingy with the good stuff, so don’t hold out in the name of discipline. Some great foods to incorporate would be fruit, cheese, nuts, meats, bread, pie, cake, or champagne. The king doesn’t need a reason to throw a feast, and neither do you!

For more information, check out:

Betwixt the Shadows on Youtube, run by my boss at the occult shop and the head tarot reader who is also an accomplished astrologer. They take questions every week!

@salvatore_modern_witch, my boss’s instagram, where he posts lecture videos based in his forty years of experience in planetary and ceremonial magic. (It is not very fancy, because he is an old man, but it is super informative!)

Sphere and Sundry, which combines the most potent planetary magical materia with the most incredibly comprehensive product descriptions I have ever seen. Even if you don’t feel like shopping, their website is worth ransacking for the information alone.

Austin Coppock’s online almanac and just in general everything that @adapembroke has going on.

Go forth and be merry in your power!

[belpheroo]

home again home again

Pairing: Mammon x MC Rating: T Summary: A follow-up to the last day. MC Adjusts to life back in the human realm, but Devildom just can’t stay away.

As Lucifer had promised, when she returned home, no time had passed. It was as if that year, that time she spent in Devildom, belonged wholly to a time and a place outside of the realm of her human reality.

He had warned her some memories might soften, fading around the edges until she would start to question whether they had happened… but given her celestial heritage, perhaps she would have a different experience. She was no magic user like Solomon, but Lilith’s blood was magic in itself and that blood was in her veins, no matter how small.

She left her bags packed on her floor, venturing out her bedroom door and into the hallway. It was twilight, just like when she left, warm amber sunlight shining just barely over the edges of the window frames.

A clock ticked. Her cat mrrowed curiously from their sleeping spot. Her college texts laid on the small kitchen table, notebooks and pens scattered where she had left them.

Quietly, deliberately, she moved through her small kitchenette, putting on her electric kettle and taking down a familiar mug and a familiar bag of tea. She ripped open the package, set the bag in the mug and waited.

And waited.

And waited for it to feel real.

---

A week went by and then another. Her morning classes came and went. She found herself falling behind her friends, not even listening to their chatter as she focused out on the people passing by on their street and across it.

“Who are you looking for?”

One of them had asked, smiling and cheeky.

“You have a date?”

There was no shock of white among the crowd, no familiar voice.

“... no, I’m just… people watching.”

By the time she got home and set down to study she noted all the doodles in her margins were of tiny lesser demons, with their top-hats and little horns.

She sighed, dropping her pencil in defeat and picking up her phone to check Devilgram. In front of her eyes, the screen displayed one sentence in a grey box:

Out of Service Zone

Mammon had said it would work, that it would still connect… but it seemed he was wrong. Instead, she navigated to her saved chats, flicking through lines of conversations and messages going back the course of the year. It was easy to get lost, to read and to laugh and think of those past conversations and of her boys, somewhere in a realm between worlds.

She knew it wasn’t a good idea to get too caught up, not when there was work still to be done. With a heart, no less heavy, she moved to set the device face down on her desk when she noted the screen had illuminated, the pale blue-green color showing against the table surface.

She held her breath as she turned it over.

Signal Found Reestablishing Connection…

…

…

Connection Reestablished

The access was slow, nothing had changed on the screen, no new notifications or chats. She waited, eager to see the little pink birds that would soon dot her screen. She wondered how they all had been doing, whether they missed her and how things were.

She had expected a few notifications, maybe even none. It had only been a week now. Instead, she opened the message center to a proverbial flood of little bird notifications. It was enough to make her laugh, the joy in her chest bursting forward as she opened the main chat group “House of Lamentation”. There were all the same questions she had for them- how are you? What have you been doing? Do you miss us?

Before responding though, her eyes caught to one of those messages with a little gold eye icon. The messages she was not supposed to be included on but for whatever reason her settings gave her access. She hadn’t seen this title before… the chat subject line simply her name followed by Absence Support Group

She clicked it.

Asmodeus: As discussed! This chat is for the support of all of us who miss our dearly departed exchange student.

Asmodeus: This is a judgement free zone <3

Satan: When you say it like that it sounds like she’s dead… couldn’t we all just text her when we miss her?

Asmodeus: Judgement. Free. Zone. ~<3

Levi: Unless your name is Stupid Mammon.

Mammon: HEY

Mammon: NO

Levi: sTuPiD mAmMoN

Belphie: Great. Another chat for me to mute. Zzz

Beel: Has anyone else texted her? I texted her. It isn’t open.

Asmodeus: Hmm? Yes, she hasn’t opened my pics either.

Mammon: PICS?

Asmodeus: Oh yes <3

Mammon: THE HELL KINDA PICS YOU SENDIN’ MY GIRL, ASSMO?

Asmodeus: Judgement Free Zone <3 <3 <3

Mammon has been muted for One minute.

Levi: You have GOT to show me how to do that!!!

Beel: I text her when I am thinking of her.

Beel: Yesterday, I got up for a snack. I stopped at her room and knocked to see if she wanted any.

Beel:  I had forgotten.

Mammon’s muted minute had been up even, judging by the time stamps, but there was still a prolonged pause before someone else responded.

Satan: I remembered I lent her a book. The Corpus Hermetica. She left it in my room sometime before she left… her bookmark was still in it.

Beel: Are you using it?

Satan: I-- yes.

Belphie: I took a nap in her old bed the other day. The sheets don’t smell like her anymore.

Levi: … I’ve been playing her really crappy low leveled character in Memoirs of the Samurai-Ninja, Warriors of Dynasty 6. So she doesn’t get even MORE behind in events.

Mammon: Oi, back up. Belphie, you did WHAT now?!

Mammon has been muted for Two minutes.

Asmodeus: No judgment zone!!

And it went on like that. Day after day. One of them would post a thought or a feeling or a moment that struck them, that reminded them of her. It shocked her a bit when the dots of something typing began to appear, then disappear, then appear and… then disappear. And this carried on for a long time before finally a new message appeared.

Mammon: So. I’m totally NOT super completely upset but the other day I was doing some a m a z i n g modeling work and the camera lady asked me where my “human friend” was.

Mammon: Threw even me, THE Mammon, off his game.

Asmodeus: Because they called her your “friend” instead of your “girlfriend”? <3

Mammon: No!

Mammon: But she is. 😈

Belphie: What if she gets a human boyfriend?

Mammon: EH?! No way! No human boy can compare to ME.

Satan: Well, you are here. She is there. Do you really expect her to wait for you?

Mammon: …

Belphie: Maybe she’d wait for one of us. But Mammon?

Mammon: H-hey! What happened to the judgment free zone?!

Satan: Would explain why she hasn’t called.

Belphie: Or texted.

Mammon: …

She felt her heart sink. She didn’t have a human boyfriend! She’d just had absolutely no SIGNAL since she had gotten back to the human realm! Panicking, she hurried to the phone section of the D.D.D and pulled Mammon’s contact up.

Hurriedly she pressed the dial, listening to the faint tone as it rang.

And rang.

And rang.

The connection was in and out again, sometimes the ring distorted with feedback. The call dropped and quickly she re-dialed again.

“C’mon… c’mon! Mammon! Pick up!”

Click.

The ringing stopped. The timer flickered on. Call Ongoing 00:03.

“Mammon?! Are you there? Can you hear me?”

There was a voice, but it was choppy and undecipherable.

“My D.D.D. isn’t working right! I can’t understand you, but if you can understand me I-- I wanted to call and say-- um. I wanted to say--!”

The line was quiet.

“I miss you all so much! S-so… please convince Lucifer to let me visit! Or come visit me!”

The phone made a sound, a strangled static burst. The battery flickered even though it had been nearly full just moments ago.

“The connection is draining my stupid phone! Ugh, I’m sorry! Tell everyone I said hello and I miss them!” she paused, words stuck on her tongue as she tried to get them out, “And Mammon… I miss you most! And I love--”

The phone made a ding sound as the battery finally and truly died. She dove to her bag, digging out the charger and desperately trying to plug it in. The first time in weeks she managed to get a call in and the human realm to Devildom signal was that bad?!

“Stupid phone. Stupid stupid stupid…”

There was a faint smell, like sulphur or burning wood. She made a face, looking over the device for any sign of damage and finding none at all. That was odd… but still she could smell an ever growing scent like something had caught fire.

Standing up, she turned half towards the hall and abruptly dropped her phone in sheer shock, the device clattering loudly.

Mammon was breathing heavily, steam coming off his body in waves. He was in his devil-form, all horns and wings.

“Wh...what… was that… last bit?” he panted, leaning against the hallway wall, “I didn’t… hear all of it!”

“You came all the way here just to finish a phone call?” she said teasingly, knowing full well what it was he really came for.

“Please! A… transport like that… is ah- nothing! To the Great Mammon!” he was still out of breath, but catching it quickly, “Now. What did you say?”

There was nothing suave in his question, nothing concealed or charming. There was something more desperate in his eyes, something needy. Her lips curled into a fond smile as she found the words came so much easier the second time.

“Mammon, I love you.”

“... of course ya do.” Mammon said, crossing the space between her both until she was snuggly in his arms. He was warm, warmer than usual after his trip, but that smell would HAVE to go.

“You need a bath.”

“Tch… then give me one.” he grumbled in reply.

Who would possibly say no?

[ayzashl]

Pairing: Shoto Todoroki x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Crack (i think)

Also um, im new to these so sorry for possible gramatical errors or typos (i dont double check bc I literally was bored doing this and just, decided to share it on tumblr lmao)

Disclaimer, I made this out of boredom because I was thinking about exams and stuff and was wondering about how my husbando would react about my situation, having placed on high ranks barely putting efforts towards studying lmao (Not rlly bragging im sorry if it came out as bragging :((, i jusy rlly be curious and hopefully I portrayed it like how I expected for him to react, sorry im new to writing bc I mainly draw🌚👉👈)

***

It was already sunset. The hues of yellow, orange and red envelops the dorms of U.A high school, its gradient tinting the windows of the students occupying the rooms shine bright, displaying its vibrant colors on the inside of each dorms facing the sunset.

You, who were sitting on your knees, switching positions time to time, searching for a particular pose to get comfortable while drawing on your boyfriend's kotatsu in his dorm, door leading into the balcony open, making the cold breeze of late October allow itself to enter the room.

Autumn has already arrived, and that also means midterm exams. It had just finished today. After a almost whole month of preparing for the exams, and the 3 days of taking it, the students of 1-A was relieved and relaxing in their rooms as the days of hardhips were finally over, plus its a Friday so the students were scattered on each others dorms due to the upcoming weekend.

You were taking a sip of your juicebox, almost emptying it now out of frustration for having a hard time drawing a hand. In your opinion, the struggle was equal or actually a lot harder than your midterms. Art frustrates you a lot and your boyfriend wonders why you still do it, yet never really ask you since he can also tell you're really passionate about it than your other hobbies.

He was sitting on his futon, leaning againts the wall as he stare at your back figure, watching you scribble something on your sketchpad and aggressively erasing it afterwards, making the papers crumble into the direction on where you rub it, making you groan in annoyance even more.

As he observes your actions, a thought runs up his mind, asking himself the same particular questions over and over again.

"Why?"

He asks himself. Why were you putting most of your effort into this drawing? Why were you more irritated in this than the midterm exams?

"Just..... why?"

Shoto had noticed you since the start of your so-called-library-dates, although its mostly just you accompanying him to gather resources for the upcoming exams while you just scan your notes or draw, or read a completely different book whose topic is not related to your exams.

Its always been like that everyday, he never really saw you offer a lot of your energy in terms of studying, like most of the students does, as he noticed the library being almost full as soon as October started.

He saw you scan your notes time to time, yes. But full on concentration on studies? no, never seen you. The most of what he saw were you fixate immensely on your math notebook before exams started, and that was it.

The exams ended abruptly on the second day but there was extra curricular on the Hero's Course on the third day before their final grade were posted. And yes, both of you did well. After the announcement, Shoto (and you) were shocked to find out that you were in 6th place and he placed in 5th. You both exchanged congratulations, you mostly squealing out of joy to actually achieve this particular rank.

Shoto on the other hand was, doubting?. Of course he feels happy for you, but at the back of his mind, he was a little agitated. You both got the exam results at the end of the third day and to his surprise (and also yours, but internally) your scores were high, almost having the amount of same mistakes as him, except your math which you devastatingly, almost failed (lmao), which merely affected your overall result since your scores were high anyways.

Your boyfriend wasnt the type to get irritated over these things, heck yeah he feels ecstatic over your accomplishment, signal the kiss he gave you on your forehead plus the soft look he gave you with a slight smile displayed on his face. But there was a faint thought of doubt running through the back of his head, how did you get such results when you were barely even studying? There was no way you would cheat right? He didnt want to accept it, he didnt want to doubt you, but it was the one of the highest possibilities that was mostly that likely happened, as he could think of right now.

He couldnt let go of this thought unless he confronts you about it right now, so he decided to ask you, waiting for a few moments, observing you, waiting for you to calm down a little from your work.

"Y/n...."

"Hmm?" you hum, not turning yout back at him, eyes and most of your attention fixated on the paper.

"How did you manage to get a high rank even though I barely saw you studying?" he finally asks, hoping you wont get offended by it, but this thought had been bothering him a little, and he wouldnt be satisfied until he gets his answer, as the stubborn man that he is.

"Are you doubting me?" you say in an offended tone, although you meant it sarcastically, turning your back, giving Shoto your full attention now as you crawl towards him, pencil dropping in the background as you make your way towards your boyfriend, offering him to lay down as you pat his futon. He complies so, already knowing you wanted to cuddle whenever you do that certain action.

You cuddle next to him, facing him as you give him a smile to reassure him that you werent offended by him back then. "Did you notice that in class, I always, almost bury my head on my notebook, writing on it almost 24/7 whenever lecture starts?" you ask him, as you start to fidget his hair on the sides which you and him really enjoy, making its way up to his bangs, and back and fort.

"You were.... writing?" Shoto asks, raising an eyebrow with the same stoic face who seemed not to show a lot of emotions, a little dumbfounded. "I thought you were doodling". You burst out in laughter from the small misunderstanding of your boyfriend.

"Of course I was. You see, whatever the teacher blurts about that sounds important to me, I write it down because, you know, its usually what appears in exams" you explain to him, closing your eyes time to time as if you were a philosopher, passionately explaining your beliefs, only with an added self-sense of humor. As he was on the other had was, fascinated.

I mean, who knew?

"Also just to clarify things, I do put some extra effort on, some of my studies"

"By some you mean just the science topic you reported you keep rereading everyday"

"......yes"

Shoto lighlty chuckles as he moves your head to his chest, placing an arm on your head, planting a kiss on your forehead, as a sign of affection like he always does. He feels a little guilty, assuming you were cheating but in the end, you were just and always has been the genius that you were. Heck if you actually put a lot of effort in your study, you might actually come out at the top in the class, but he's aware you have other things to focus and worry about as his eyes gaze at the table with a slightly crumpled juice box standing out.

"Were you mad?" you ask, out of curiousity. You had assumed he was maybe upset about the results because he gets a little too competitive or has the sentiment that he has to prove that he only isnt good with his powers, but in academics as well, considering his situation.

He lightly shook his head as he fully encloses you to his grasp, leg placed on your sides, locking you in as he settles his face on your hair, inhaling the sweet scent of your lavender shampoo in which he always adores.

You on the other hand, was relieved now that the matter was somehow resolved? Putting those thoughts at the back of your head, your perception of relief was shortly replaced by a wave of worry as you lightly chuckle of uneasiness.

"Shoto?" you tap his sides, body tightly secured onto his. This was the one that made worry. His hands tightly clutching you, but not too much, leg on your sides, locking you in so that you wont get away easily, to him it made him feel happy, knowing that you werent going away and draw for a while. You've had situations like these already and all you ever do is give up and shower him with affection, already knowing he was slightly, probably getting a little touch starved, craving for your attention and affection. But in your situation right now, it was, unpleasant, so to say.

Not after you just finished your juicebox.

-Disclaimer, uh, I made this from

He hums in response, head tilted a little more into your head's direction. He was sure you would have given up already, knowing that he will never let you go.

"I need to pee"

"..."

"Shoto..."

"........"

"Sho"

"All I can say is good luck getting out"

"......"

"Noooooooohohohoooo!!!" you exclaim, with a sarcastic crying in your tone. This was gonna be one hell of a struggle.

.

Im bad at explaining things, hope you did enjoy reading this as much as I did though :))

[belovedstill]

hi!! i have a question... i saw your reblog about freewriting and i wanted to try it myself cause i have a hard time with writing because of my anxiety but i'm not sure i understood 100%. what do you actually write while you freewrite? is it related to what you're working on at the moment, like do you freewrite a scene (kind of like sprinting in a way) or just random words/thoughts in your head?

hi <3 i understand you 100% because sometimes (most of the time) when i sit down with the intention to write, my brain subconsciously goes "okay, the pressure's ON, everything i write must be useful for the fic" (and then i go "wait, @ brain, what fic? i don't even know what fic i would write, i just want to write" and brain says "it must be useful for the fic" (which btw doesn't help, thanks @ brain but no thanks))

i will start by honestly saying that while I've been doing this for many years, I've never had a word for it. If my memory's right, then I've never heard the term "freewriting" before. I'd either call it stream of consciousness or messaging a friend or word vomit or scribbling

(i'm going to share some photos & screenshots as examples because i personally appreciate examples for things i don't know how to even start doing; i'll include content warnings above the photos wherever applicable. These things were not meant to be seen by other people, obviously, so not all of them are neat, not all of them are in English or spelled correctly, and not all of them make sense, some might not even be Socially Acceptable (i'm very anxious as well, you see, so I ask people to be kind if you do take a look at the examples and decipher what's written), but that's the whole point of these: you let your mind go without worrying about where it's going)

I'm sure every person who does freewriting does it differently but here are several ways i do it (under the cut because it got very long as i pretty much (ayyyy) freewrote it):

test a pen/pencil! you know when you get a new pen and write down the most random thing on a piece of paper to see what the ink looks like and how it feels to write using that pen? for me it's usually a single word or a phrase from a song (my go-tos are hello, wait, Beloved (my MC's name, shhh) and other fictional characters' names or Why you gotta be so mean? from Taylor Swift's song "Mean", don't ask me why because i have no answer)

writing down the lyrics to a song that's currently stuck in your mind and living there rent-free, and if you forget the next line or if something else pops into your head - let it take you over

write on random pieces of paper! the less it reminds you of a notebook/blank page, the better! sometimes that means what's left of printer paper or post-it notes. actually, most of the photos of paper pages in this post are from my poor quality notebooks - the paper is too thin or not smooth or the pages are yellowish, so i don't feel bad """wasting""" the notebook for doodles, random scribbles, etc.

a diary entry? a diary entry, except there doesn't have to be depth to it, no journaling type of reflection on your feelings, on your experiences, on the Daily Journaling Prompt necessary--unless you want to. in my case it's mostly complaining about the pen i decided to use or the quality of the paper but!!! because i let myself write anything and everything on one page, at one point it feels natural to write some random story sentences on the other page

CW: implied past physical abuse

brainstorming! here's where, for me, the "messaging a friend" name came from. i have a very vague idea for what i want to write or a very small detail i want to write about, but nothing else. i set up a timer and write everything down (the screenshot is taken from my very own personal discord server, it's just me and a writing bot. at one point i realised that whenever i was brainstorming or writing cheer up ficlets in my friends' discord DMs, writing went super easy because my brain didn't register it as writing, but as chatting. At first, I formatted a new google doc so it looked exactly like discord's dark theme, but ultimately decided that just creating a new server just for my writing process/practice/etc and stuff is easier)

CW: harmful & discouraging stuff asexual people face

"I don't know what to write, I don't even think I want to write an actual story, it's not going to stop me" kind of writing. Anything goes and I mean anything. The sentences aren't connected. There's no actual idea or story behind the sentences. You're just writing a word after a word after a word. Sometimes a question appears in your mind, so you write it down. The question leads to more questions, or maybe an answer, or maybe you realise you like the feel/sound of one word so you write it again and again. After you wrote the word three times, tiny ideas form in your mind, things you relate to that word. Then you lose track of the thought so you write "I lost track", then a piece of dialogue floats in your mind that's probably inspired or part of a song lyric you wrote earlier

CW: unconventional/controversial lovers

if your writing anxiety is caused by fandom wank regarding some topics, tropes, themes, or even genres, know that if you freestyle about the thing you're worried somebody would judge you for, nobody else will read it. you can delete the doc afterwards. you can password protect it. you can tear the page out of your notebook and shred it to pieces. i won't include a photo example of this one (anxious, remember? also, it's nsfw) but i did this with smut-specific words and phrases. i got a blank piece of paper and wrote--first, just words (nouns for genitalia, verbs for action, etc. let me tell you - i was alone in the room and even trying to write the first word was difficult, in my head i kept thinking back to people's conversations on how "problematic these words are" etc etc etc and that fed my anxiety even further because "oh god what if they knew i was about to write this, what would they think of me"), then the words combined into phrases, then common smexy phrases that characters in smut say, and so on and so on. no punctuation because it's not a story. you know what happened after i put that first word on the page? nothing. i felt silly, sure, but i repeated the word several more times and still no People From the Internet barged into my room to ridicule & judge me. during that session, freestyling for that genre got easier and easier with every word.

Two posts that helped me realise that warming up for writing (and anything creative) is a good idea:

Writers need warm up sketches too (my way of warm up is usually either freewriting or using a typing speed website)

The anatomy of a pen/pencil etc

...and I think that's all from me 💕 apologies for how long this is but I hope it helps you in some way *hugs*

[riarushi]

you as the female maknae of nct. (updated ver)

So apparently a lot of you wanted me to update this, so I hope you enjoy! (I added in our new members as well~) ALSO, I’m starting to need new ideas for the Twitter posts, so if you have any, feel free to send them in and I’ll try my best to make it into a post! ~Ness

Profile:

Member Interaction:

Taeil

The one you can always run to when you need immediate assistance.

Loves it when you do.

Will unnecessarily teach you all his lines in every NCT song he sings in.

“What happens if I’m sick? Y/N can fill in my spot.”

Doesn’t want to spoil you but finds it hard not to once you’re around.

When he hasn’t seen you in a while, he’ll make sure to send a text to check up on you.

Johnny

SM won’t let you guys share a room anymore.

Last time, the two of you filled the room with plushies to the point where neither of you could sleep on your beds.

A prominent big brother figure, loves giving you life advice.

You’re his favourite model for photos.

“Just keep doing that, you’ll look even cuter than usual in this picture.”

Would totally start picking fluff off your clothes while you guys stand on stage.

Taeyong

You’re totally his favourite member.

He just won’t admit it.

Has a little shelf in where he keeps all the handmade presents you make for him.

Probably makes something for you in return.

“Look! It matches the bracelet you made me, too!”

Would want to wear the matching bracelets during SMTOWN shows.

Yuta

Can’t restrain himself from wrapping his arms around you every time he sees you.

It doesn’t even matter if you’re filming a variety show or you’re doing a live.

“Y/N~ My small girl~~~”

Takes you out on runs with him sometimes.

Chatting during runs is relaxing and calm, and definitely quality bonding time for the both of you.

You bet he’s not speaking anything other than Japanese with you.

Kun

You’re one of his three (3) children.

Helps you do things without you needing to even ask.

“I looked over your Korean homework, do you want me to help you with that question you didn’t finish?”

Zips your coat up before you leave the dorms, before shoving your bag in your hands.

He made sure not to forget anything you would need for the day while packing it.

Turns off your lights for you before you sleep.

Doyoung

Comes to visit you while you record in the recording studio.

He likes it when you wave at him through the booth window.

Knows the most pointless trivia about you out of all the members due to all the small talk he makes with you.

“Y/n wouldn’t like that. She thinks that colour doesn’t suit her.”

Sends you a lot of aesthetic posts or motivational quotes.

You’ll wake up to see that he’s sent over forty (40) since last night.

Ten

You guys are literally inseparable dance partners.

Takes you out to go get something to eat or drink after practices.

Always teaches you new words that he learns in Chinese.

Would literally squeal if you wanted to learn Thai.

“Wait, say that again! Your pronunciation was almost better than mine.”

I can see him jokingly fitting Japanese into his conversations with you.

Jaehyun

Unintentionally babies you, but immediately apologizes when he realizes.

Always willing to listen to you vent and give advice.

He would take you out to go grab a drink together on your off days.

“Hey, Y/N. I’m gonna go get some coffee, you wanna come?”

Remembers your usual order, but offers to buy the special if you seem interested in it.

Literally the best big brother figure.

Winwin

Despite the fact that he hates skinship, he finds it cute when you grab his arm.

Has definitely gotten closer to you since you moved in, and likes going out with you sometimes.

Probably takes you to dog cafes a lot.

“Do you think that big fluffy one will remember me if I visit it everyday?”

The two of you feel at ease with each other, so you’ve started dropping the polite speech and honorifics with him.

Still continues to choose to be on your team for variety games.

Jungwoo

Showers you with compliments and refuses to stop unless you take them.

“You’re the cutest,Y/N! Just accept it!”

Comes to you for support, and always reminds you that he has your back too.

Buys you things that remind him of you when he’s travelling with 127.

Gives them all to you once he gets back.

Almost half of your plushie collection is contributions from Jungwoo.

Lucas

Always greets you by messing up your hair and attempting to give you a fistbump.

It’s his goal to always keep you out of a bad mood.

Very joking, I can see him always smiling and cracking jokes around you.

“WAIT NO I HAVE AN EVEN BETTER JOKE, LISTEN TO THIS Y/N.”

Absentmindedly grabs your hand and starts playing with your fingers while on stage.

Considers you one of his closest friends.

Mark

Your teacher in lyric writing and other musical aspects.

Can’t resist looking at your notebook whenever he can.

“Oh, Y/N! Y-You’re back... I wasn’t looking at your lyrics. Or anything. Just sitting here and waiting for you.”

Invites you to come watch him record no matter what unit he’s recording for.

He gets excited when you walk in with a cup of watermelon juice for him.

The two of you made a playlist full of songs you both like, and it gets updated often.

Xiaojun

Wants you to join him in his health adventures.

“We can start today! Let’s go get some vegetables and create a delicious and nutritious dish.”

Still continues to wake you up at 3 in the morning to get something sweet to eat.

Also enjoys spending late nights playing video games with you and some of the other members.

Scrambles to turn off the computer and cover the two of you with blankets when he hears someone shuffling outside the room.

It’ll be a while until the both of you develop that healthy lifestyle.

Hendery

Has kept himself somewhat polite and courteous around you.

If he’s joking around with another member and notices you, he’ll get embarrassed.

“Y/N! I didn’t see you there just now.. How are you today?”

Really wants to be close with you.

To show how much he cares about his relationship with you, he’ll buy you a little cactus.

Puts it on your desk and leaves a little encouraging note.

Renjun

Helps you study Korean mostly, but will help with any subject you need assistance with.

“Oh, this one? It’s actually pretty simple, pass me your pencil and I’ll show you how to do it.”

Casually starts doodling Moomin on the side of your paper while you do your work.

He won’t erase his doodling even if you ask him to.

If your sad, he lets you wrap your arms around his waist and pull yourself into him.

Gets so soft and pats your head.

Jeno

Also regular participant in the 3 AM video game party.

Is literally fighting Xiaojun for his favourite gaming buddy back.

“Please stop teaming with him! I’ll play support if you play with me~”

Finds it so hard to not agree to do anything you say.

He’ll get you anything you need. Cuddles? Of course! Something to drink? Take all the water bottles he could find!

You might want to team with him as soon as possible before he spoils you too much.

Haechan

“Who’s Mark Lee? My favourite member is Y/N~”

He’s your number one fanboy.

Begs you to do aegyo on the daily, using his own aegyo to try to convince you.

Is always hugging you and resting his chin on the top of your head during fansigns.

After all the NCTzens are done getting their albums signed, he’ll get up and walk over to your part of the table to pretend to get your autograph too.

Casually initiates a lot of skinship.

Jaemin

Your first and closest friend in NCT.

He shares and does everything with you.

Loves to watch movies with you, the two of you have a movie-watching tradition.

“What should we watch today..?”

Keeps an arm around your shoulders whenever you’re chilling beside each other.

Sometimes surprises you with quick pecks on your temple as he walks by you in fansigns.

Yangyang

One (1) of your two (2) siblings.

Teases you often, but will always side with you when you’re arguing with someone else.

During practices, he’s completely different and is quite serious.

“Try doing this sort of rhythm instead. It’ll sound more natural.”

Gives really good advice to help you improve your performance.

Despite all the teasing he does, he really cares for you and loves you like a little sister.

Chenle

One (1) of your two (2) siblings.

The two of you bicker a lot, but are always comfortable with it because of how chill you are with each other.

Just like real siblings, to be honest.

Usually doesn’t complain when you sneak a bite of his second helping of ramen.

Unless he really doesn’t want to share.

“Hey! That’s the last bit of noodle, give it back!”

Jisung

Likes to point out small little habits he notices you have, and gets embarrassed when you do it back.

For example if you point out his scrunched nose, he’ll quickly cover it up with his hands.

“Don’t talk about it like that! I can’t help it...”

While overseas, he’ll constantly look at you for encouragement while speaking in a language you know well.

In return, he’ll help you with perfecting your dance moves.

Finds it to be extremely cute when you wear his caps.

[margotryan]

hey cuties!!! my name is fiona and i’m here and i’m EXCITED!!!! this is margot (but her CLOSE friends call her marley) , and i apologize ahead of time. she’s hard to unpack, but she’s a whole lotta fun!! give this post a like if you want to plot!! i have some wc’s listed on my blog, but TBH i prefer brainstorming sometimes??? depends on the muses! but without further adieux, here she is!

CISFEMALE — ever hear people say MARGOT RYAN looks a lot like KENDALL JENNER? I think SHE is about TWENTY-TWO, so it doesn’t really work. The BARTENDER has lived in Livingstone for TWENTY-TWO. They can be +PASSIONATE, but they can also be -VOLATILE. I think MARLEY might be A SHEEP. ( f. 19. est. she/her. )

BASICS

full name: MARGOT JEAN MARTIN

nicknames: MAR, MARLEY ( given to her by her friends after watching marley and me)

age: 22

dob: feb 3, 1997.

zodiac: aquarius.

occupation: bartender/instagram model.

THE PAST

mar was born and raised in livingstone, vermont to an extremely successful lawyer couple. 

the ryans work out of new york city mostly, so growing up marley grew bonds with her babysitters, nannies, teachers instead of her parents

BUT they work there because they’re celebrity lawyers, getting paid a pretty penny for representing high profile criminals, as well as your everyday tabloid actress/musician/you name it. 

her whole life, her parents bragged about how their only daughter (unless someone wants a siblings plot?? im down!) would follow in their footsteps eventually

despite how some people might react after growing up in this lifestyle, marley always had a deep love and respect for her parents and their goal-oriented view of things. so, despite being more of a creative and having no real desire to fulfill her parents’ wishes for her career, growing up she would just smile and nod along at whatever they said

TW MURDER: in her freshman year of high school, she began growing popularity. (this is also when she met her boyfriend, kieran.) her parents were representing an actor going through an extremely public murder case, which meant everyone knew her last name. it started out as whispers and stares, and marley didn’t even know why. her parents could never talk to her about their cases, so she was completely unaware of the case until finally, one of her friends pulled up the article

she went home and began researching herself, and mar was genuinely interested in it. she watched the news and read all the gossip about the theories simply because she found the dark undertones fascinating. it was something she hadn’t really been exposed to in her life. everything had been glitz and glam and smiles and money and parties, and it was like she was seeing a different side of the world she never knew about

now that she was informed about the case, she began answering her peers’ prying questions. she wasn’t doing anything wrong since all her information was obtained from the internet and not her parents, and suddenly people seemed to be a lot more interested in her

it also didn’t hurt that this was around the time she started caring about her appearance. she was berated with paparazzi every time she left her house during this time period, and she couldn’t escape the watchful eyes even at school. so, with her parents’ credit card in hand she went on a shopping spree, redesigning her entire wardrobe as well as practically cleaning out sephora’s entire stock

kieran had been the first to notice this new look, and they soon began dating. he was her first love, and she was absolutely infatuated. perhaps an unlikely couple, but Marley couldn’t care less about that. she still doodled his name all over her notebooks, and told him all about her plans for their future

after some time, the case came to a close and by the time she graduated it was long forgotten about. but marley was never forgotten about. she solidified her place as the queen bee for the rest of her high school career. and just like she nodded along with her parents’ plans for her, she did the same with her popularity. her main focus, however, was on kieran. 

she ended up the captain of the cheerleading team, prom queen, as well as class president and valedictorian. 

she was never a mean girl, which is probably why she was so well liked. she was the kind of girl you looked at and you were like “damn, she��s so beautiful, there’s no way she’s nice too” but then bam. and then she’s smart too?? how could you not love her???

she was also a bit naive. because she’d never really experienced pain or any misfortune at all, she never even considered the possibility of anything bad happening to her. that was until she found out kieran had been cheating on her. practically the entire time they had been together. thankfully, this knowledge came to light after graduation, just before she was to leave for college.

this personality followed her through college, and yes, she did attend harvard like her parents had begged her to. it wasn’t hard considering her parents had attended there, and they’d donated more than their fair share to the school. however, it was because of the pain of being cheated on, and the alluring sense of being in a new place all on her own that she discovered her love for the arts. she began drawing, painting.. anything from portraits, to abstract pieces, to fashion designs. she also picked up the piano, and she did sing and write a little bit of music, but she was far too embarrassed of it to tell anyone. she won’t even sing in front of anyone. 

however, she entered harvard with a major in pre-law, but after taking a random art class as an elective her first semester, she changed it to business. she knew she couldn’t switch to art without an entire revolution from her parents, so she concocted some excuse about wanting to be the CEO of her own corporation. this, of course, was equally as acceptable to her parents 

but in reality, she just wanted to learn how to market herself as a creative. whether she decided to be an artist, a fashion designer, a singer, or whatever else it was, she knew a degree in that field would do almost nothing for her, while business knowledge could make or break her

THE PRESENT

Marley graduated in 2018, and moved back home to livingstone where she met who else but michael green. the two became friends soon enough, and her parents were absolutely thrilled

her parents were the main driving force between the two getting together. they hated kieran, of course, when they were together. but michael green was the golden boy of livingstone, so he was perfect for the golden girl of living stone. 

ever since high school, marley had been blissfully separated from the rest of her parents’ cases. however, she hadn’t escaped the courtroom just yet

although this time, she was taking the stand in defense of michael, her boyfriend, in the trial for the murder of kieran, her first love. none of it seemed real. it still doesn’t seem real to her 

she tries her absolute best to stay away from the entire situation. she hasn’t opened the app once since it’s been on her phone, and she hasn’t even spoken to her parents since court. 

she lives by herself in an apartment she pays for with her bartending job that her parents have no idea about. but, it pays her bills while she gets to create art - her favorite coping mechanism

but this is the first time she’s ever experienced hate online. she’d been receiving negative press from those same sites she had bookmarked on her laptop. ever since that first case she’d grown an obsession with the macabre, and frequently checked up on her favorite news sites, conspiracy theory sites, and other things of the sort. she knew so much about serial killers and other high profile crimes that she could probably conduct the perfect one and get away with it scot free. hmmmmm. anyway.

now these sites were posting about her, questioning her involvement in the whole thing. even she had to admit that her presence in the case was simply uncanny

but just like everything else in her life, she never asked for this. now, she wishes she could just go back to being the girl who got good grades, wore ugly wire glasses, and always had greasy hair. 

PERSONALITY

marley loves to shock people. whether intentionally or unintentionally, it constantly happens. at first glance, she’s just another rich, pretty girl who’s been pampered every moment of her life. after everything she’s been through, that’s the distance she likes to keep between her and most people. sure, she’s kind to everyone she meets, but it can come off as fake to those that don’t know her. she just has that face. queen of rbf. but, her true heart and her mind are reserved for those who have proven to be worthy of it. 

she is fiercely independent. that’s shown by the way that she defied her parents, while still maintaining her adoration and respect for them. she never had a rebellious phase, never let their controlling nature change who she was. she never lets people tell her how to think. and as she grows older and experiences more, she’s breaking her silence. she’s starting to not bite her tongue and smile and nod so as to keep being a nice little girl and not start any trouble. instead, she’s starting to voice her opinion, despite what anyone else thinks of it. 

she definitely has a laaaarge group of friends. the kind of person that just gets along with everyone?? if they’re so lucky as to keep her attention, that is. sure, she’s nice to everyone she meets and if they ask to exchange numbers she’ll oblige. but that doesn’t mean she won’t block that number as soon as she leaves or simply ignore all the texts and calls from her ‘new friend.’ if there’s something off about you, she cuts you off before you get too close to know too much about her. simple as that. 

but despite that she considers herself mainly a lone wolf. no one has your back like you do kind of thing. she doesn’t believe people have it in them to genuinely love and care for another person, especially when it comes to her. as far as she’s concerned, she has yet to see proof of that and she is a very ‘i need to see it to believe it’ kind of person

her inner workings and thought processes are certainly intense, but outwardly, she’s pretty laidback and likes to joke around. 

she’s also beginning to party more. she starts by drinking and trying drugs alone in her apartment, but if she met someone who was well versed in those kinds of things??? yeah they’d get into trouble

[arthurmorganuniverse]

Hymne a l'amour | 1

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x OC

Summary: As a writer, Crystal was always on the lookout for inspiration. When she came across a journal packed with heartbreak and adventure, she thought she’d found it. Only the journal’s once filled pages are now blank, except for the one writing itself in front of her eyes. 

Word Count: 1160 (This first chapter here is kinda short, but I was excited to get started and I felt that was a good point to end the chapter. Cliff hanger! Sorta )

Notes: Welcome to my first fic for RDR2! I write for many other fandoms, but I am so deep into my Arthur feels lately that I decided it was time for me to try my hand at writing something for him. This will be sfw for a while, but I am definitely not afraid of smut so there is a good chance some will happen eventually. Forewarning for purists: I am going to be playing fast and loose with the actual journal entries. There will be bits here and there that are canon, but I plan on adding a few original entries as well, like things that I wish he’d written about. Also, you can expect a happy ending because I am not about that hardcore angst life. This is loosely based on the movie The Lake House. 

There was something to be said about the smell of an antique store. Sure, some might find it offputting, but not her. It was the smell of history, of lives lived to their fullest. Her sister regularly argued that it was just the mold and mildew getting to her brain. Whatever it was, the smell has become a sort of comfort for her. 

Crystal Anderson was currently browsing her favorite part of the massive store; the book corner. It was one of the largest spots in the store, with ten bookcases overflowing with every genre, as well as areas for things like photos and basically anything written or printed. She’s often spent hours in this one corner alone, browsing through journals and photos, writing stories in her mind for everyone she saw. 

A few years ago Crystal had been fortunate to find a series of love letters between a couple of world war two nurses, tracked down the family and obtained the rest of the story, leading to a book that was doing very well. She’d even heard there were people circling her agent about a movie. 

She was under no illusions that she’d be able to recreate that success, but here she was scrounging through the random piles yet again. She’d found a few interesting photos, some first edition books in good condition that she’d probably just add to her own collection, and a few journals the shop owner had given her to look over. 

The journals looked especially promising. It wasn’t often that you were able to find actual journals with just about every page filled, and most shops didn’t take them. This particular shop did just for her because she’s been a regular customer for many years and they knew she’d want them. 

There were two in particular that Crystal was excited about. One was owned by a girl growing up during the 1960′s and 70′s, and the little glimpses she had showed the girl was a wild one. 

The second was even more exciting. Based on the wear and tear this thing was old - really old. She hadn’t caught any dates yet, but based on the drawings she was guessing this was straight up wild west era. The thing was bursting with entries and surprisingly good drawings, even maps. Crystal had a feeling this was the find she’d been looking for. 

The man writing was so complex. One moment he was writing about a killing someone without blinking an eye, the next he was going on about how much he wanted to be a good man and doodling little animals. There was even a whole page dedicated to how much he loved his horse. She wasn’t sure if there was a real story in this yet, but she had that gut feeling that this was important. 

That feeling stayed with her as she made her way home, placing her new acquisitions carefully on her desk. She knew she had a long night ahead of her, so she tried her best to put the cowboy ( the man was obviously an outlaw, what with the talk of killings, but cowboy was ever so much fun to say) out of mind and made herself a quick dinner. 

Once she was sufficiently full and dressed in comfortable clothing it was time to work. Crystal grabbed a blank notebook to take notes on important facts she’d find; dates, names, places, etc. She sipped on a cup of tea while her laptop fired up, slowly getting herself into her writing headspace. Finally ready, she set her cup far away from the journals and slowly opened the man’s journal, the leather crackling with age. 

It was gone. 

Every single word. 

All gone. 

Crystal’s mind went blank in her confusion. There had to be a rational explanation, right? Maybe she picked up the wrong journal? The outside looked exactly the same as it had, but maybe there were two of them and she hadn’t known? Maybe invisible ink? Did they even have that kind of ink back then? 

She picked up the girl’s journal and cracked it open. It was still the same. Every word was there, the band tickets and flowers still stuck between the pages. 

She went back to the other one and it was still blank. 

What. The. Fuck. 

Crystal set the journal back on the desk, staring at the first page in conflicted wonder. She had no idea what happened. She was certain the writing was still there when she got home. She remembered flicking through on her way to the desk and giggling over a story he’d written about a fox stealing his hat and he’d been forced to chase it. Unless she was currently dreaming, there was no logical explanation for why this journal should be empty. 

She caught a flicker of movement and refocused on the desk. As she watched in horror, a list and a map began to appear on the first two pages, the scrawl the same familiar cursive from before. Once it was finished, she turned the page to see it happening again, a massive drawing of a city filling both sides. When that too was done, her trembling hands turned the page once more, watching as an entry was being written right in front of her. 

I bought this new journal, after that last one got destroyed in that fire all those months ago, whenever it was. 

Haven’t written or drawn much in the past few months, but I was missing it more than I thought I would, and finally near a store, so here I am, I guess.

After all that business up North and the fire, we spent a few months in the wilderness, traveling down from the Northern Grizzlies,

Crystal watched those words appear with both bone-deep terror and maybe a little excitement. Terror, she reasoned, would be anyone’s first reaction. There was apparently a magic book in front of her like she was god damned Harry Potter and she was fresh out of Basilisk teeth to stab it with. However, she was still a bit excited because it was so crazy. Or maybe she was the one crazy, she wasn’t sure yet. Whatever was going on, if she’d bought a haunted book or lost her mind, this was exciting. 

As long as nothing tried to possess her or kill her or something. 

Crystal picked up her pen and clenched her jaw as she placed her shaky hand onto the page. Here goes nothing. 

Please tell me this isn’t Tom Riddle...

At least three minutes passed with nothing, and she started to relax. Maybe she was dreaming and it was starting to mess up. Or maybe she was hallucinating. Regardless, nothing was happening so she figured at the very least her Voldemort theory was out. 

Until she once again spied movement on the page. 

Who the hell is Tom Riddle? 

There we go! My first RDR2 work. As I said, it’s kinda short because I was excited, but future chapters will be a bit longer. I’m still waiting on my invite from ao3 to go through and then I’ll post it on there as well. Please feel free to let me know what you think and my ask box is open if you wanted to hit that up. Since this is my first, feedback is CRUCIAL! Even if it’s just, “Hey, this is cool.”

[mentallyinwalmart]

Cressworth Modern Au- Dear Liza

I have a HC that even in a modern setting, Audrey Rose would still write letters to Liza when she was at Uni. Here are some of those letters throughout the first term of school~

Dear Liza,

Well the first week at Uni has been an absolute whirlwind. I miss father and uncle dearly (not to mention you of course). But I have made lots of new friends. You would love my roomate, Ileana. Noah from my anatomy class, and Anna from psychology are really cool too, and I feel lucky to have met such great people so early on. Noah and Anna are in my major study group, along with some stuck up bloke called Andrei and a few other people I don’t really know. It is a good group, all of us are very determined (though it is only the first week).

I have to tell you, Liza, the absolute funniest thing happened at orientation over the weekend. You remember Uncle’s summer intern? For the life of me I can’t remember his name, but, well he tripped coming down the steps to come over and greet uncle and I. I swear to you Liza, I almost died trying not to laugh out loud. Uncle says he is very bright, and that I will probably run into him at some point this term, seeing as he is in my same major, but so far, he seems to have disappeared. I spaced on asking uncle for his name, so it would seem perhaps I won’t encounter him again.

I am going to a party tonight, and I’m wearing that dress you made for me before I left. Ileana says I look ravishing, so cheers to you!

But enough about me, how is the school of design? How are your classes and flatmates? I want to know everything.

Love always,

Audrey Rose

--

Dear Audrey Rose,

The school of design is amazing! Paris is beautiful, and my flatmates are absolutely incredible! You must visit, because you would just die for the culture here. It is so different than home, even if it is just a train ride away.

Anna and Ileana sound just lovely. I think you’d get along swimmingly with my favorite flatmate Daciana. She has the most iconic grunge/vampy look, and it perfectly compliments my summer child vibe. We lovingly refer to one another as our “other halves”. I am dying for you to meet her. And perhaps one day soon you might! She has a brother who actually is enrolled at your school! I’ll be sure to ask if he’s the annoying Andrei. How funny would that be!

But anyway, Daci wants to take the train down to London to visit him in a few weeks time and unless something major happens between us in that time, I’m going to accompany her! It will be so wonderful, cousin!

But now that all that about me is out of the way, let’s talk about your encounter with Uncle’s (super hot) summer apprentice. WHAT LUCK AUDREY ROSE!!! I vividly remember the time the two of you met briefly, and how flustered you were when he walked away. Deny it all you want, but I know you were smitten.

If you see him again, I insist, for the sake of my romantic soul, that you speak to him, instead of laughing at him.

Love you, see you soon,

Liza

Ps- his name is Thomas you absolute fool

--

Dear Liza,

Before I get to my questions about Daci, and about the new aesthetic you’ve seemingly assigned yourself in the few short weeks we’ve been apart, I want to address how ridiculous your claims are.

I have zero feelings for Thomas. Except perhaps feelings of annoyance. True, I found him quite attractive when we met last summer, but i find plenty of people attractive without being “smitten” as you so foolishly put it.

And even if I had been over the summer (which I was not), it is surely gone after working with him this last week. Thomas was a surprise addition to my study group starting at the beginning of this week, and he has proven himself to be most insufferable.

Who has to be right all the time?

And dear Liza, I do not mean “stick to their guns even when they’re wrong” right, I mean, actually, genuinely correct, every damn time. It’s positively infuriating!

Now that we’ve established that the only thing I want between me and Thomas is a brick wall, tell me about your “summer child” aesthetic. Last time I saw you, you were neck deep in prep chic. What has changed?

Daci sounds positively lovely, and I cannot wait to meet her and to see you both.

Anna and I went on this unbelievable night hike last weekend, we went through the forest to the old ruins atop the hill. I’ll have to take you when you come to visit.

Ileana has a friend that goes to your school! She wouldn’t give me a name, saying since it’s such a small school she worries you’d know her, and is keeping her past girlfriends a secret from me ://

Hopefully someday soon I’ll get it out of her. It sounds like she was something special.

Love you, and I excitedly await your visit.

Audrey Rose

--

Dear Audrey Rose,

First off, I am, and have always been, a summer child. It’s too grey in London for me to fully unleash it. But now here, in Paris, it is lively and warm enough for me to embrace who I really am. You just like to imagine I was a prep because your taste is not nearly refined enough to understand my unique look. (Love you cousin, even if you have the fashion sense of an old woman ;) )

I can’t believe I not only go to school with Ileana’s ex, but also the sister of someone at your school! It’s fate! I’m not sure yet if what kind, but it’s something.

As for Thomas, he sounds infuriating. But then again, isn’t “hot-but-annoying” exactly the criteria for a hate sex partner? I’m just saying, maybe it’s time to ditch the sweaters for something a little more showy and get yourself some action ;)

Love you, please don’t disown me for my foul mouth.

Kisses,

Liza

--

Dear Liza,

I made the mistake of reading this in the mail room right after I opened my post box.

And who should I smack right into as my face was burning so hot I was worried my blood may boil?

Thomas.

Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was?!

Not that I care what he thinks of me, I would’ve been embarrassed if I’d run into anyone like that.

He asked what I was reading, and because I’m bad at making up lies, I panicked and just mumbled something about having to go.

He had the most infuriating smirk, I swear his already full lips probably doubled in size.

What an absolute buffoon.

Later that night I found him sitting in the (usually vacant) seat besides me in forensics. It’s such a big lecture, I didn’t even know he was in the class. I wasn’t about to ask him to move, even I’m not that harsh. He spent most of the class doodling around the edge of his notebook (he was the only one in the whole lecture who didn’t have a laptop) and yet somehow, he always had the best theories.

Though I don’t like him, I plan to glean everything I can from having him as a new seat mate. He is quite intelligent, but more than that he can insert himself into the situations. It’s fascinating the way his mind works, I intend to steal that trait from him.

As for trading in my sweaters? I will never. They are my truest love. And as for hate sex? Absolutely not. I’m not letting someone I hate be my first time.

Love, your fashion forward cousin,

Audrey Rose

--

My Dearest (fashionably challenged) cousin,

So what you’re saying, is if it wasn’t your first time, you would take the handsome Thomas straight to bed? You little slut.

Daci and I have set a date for our trip. It is to be two weeks from tomorrow, for neither of us have classes on fridays. We will take the evening train, and be with you by midnight!

Her brother is to pick us up from the station in his car, and drive us to your school. I can’t wait to see you!!!

My whole heart is bursting at the thought (just as yours is bursting with loooooove for Thomas)

Seriously Audrey Rose, no one can write that much about someone they “hate so much”.

I know just how frank you can be, and if you truly disliked him as much as you say, you’d have told him to move, or simply say somewhere else.

That and you wouldn’t have gone into such detail about how intelligent he is and how much you think you can learn from him (not to mention how full his lips are!!).

Stop denying it, and just embrace the fact that you are not only attracted to his face, but his intellect.

Can’t wait to tease you about it in person,

Liza

--

Dear Liza,

You’re wrong.

Enough about Thomas (though he did bring me a cup of tea to forensics lecture last night when I mentioned earlier that afternoon at study group how tired I was, and how I didn’t have a break until after our night lecture).

I don’t know why I felt compelled to tell you that, maybe just to do him the justice of demonstrating maybe he isn’t all bad.

But still, besides that courtesy he remains an annoyance.

I cannot wait to see you. Ileana and I have found the most wonderful little pub with this incredible live band. They’re from America, and they play this music called “surfer punk”. It is, the strangest thing, but I think you will love them. And if what you’ve said about Daci is true, she will too.

Oh, and speaking of women at your school, Ileana’s ex is apparently “the one who got away”. She told me and Anna the other night when we were all hanging out together in our room. How they only broke up because they were going to different schools. It was the saddest story.

Please don’t stop being my best friend just because you are a Parisian fashion queen surrounded by other Parisian fashion queens.

Love, your bff,

Audrey Rose

--

Dear Audrey Rose,

First of all, unless someone at school with me here can become better than you, they will never replace you as my best friend/future maid of honor. And spoiler alert, they won’t.

Daci is wonderful, but she will never replace you, no matter how alike we are, you complete me as my polar opposite in some aspects, and yet my mirror image in others.

Wow that was pretty, maybe I ought to be a creative writing major.

In regards to your little Thomas situation, i have been teasing you mercilessly, but in all honesty, that tea thing was very sweet. I think he may have a thing for you too. (Even if it’s just a “id smash if given the opportunity” kinda deal)

This feels like it’s going somewhere, I am thrilled to be experiencing this iconic love story second hand.

your bff,

Liza

Ps- if you get to insist Daci and my other fashion friends don’t replace you than I must insist that Anna and Ileana never replace me in your heart. If I find out you confess your feelings about Thomas to them before me, I will be infuriated. (That is mostly a joke, but in every joke there is a little bit of truth.)

Love youuuuu,

Liza

--

Dear Liza,

Of course no one will ever replace you. You’re stuck having me as a best friend forever.

Now that we’re done with that nonsense, I have so much to fill you in on.

We just got slapped with this massive midterm project that is due the day you leave, so naturally I am going to try and get it done before you come. I assumed I was working alone because Thomas didn’t bother asking if I might want to work with him, and I don’t know anyone else in that class. But two days ago, there comes a knock on my door. Naturally, I assumed it was Anna or that Illy had forgotten her keys, so I opened the door.

And who should be leaned against the door frame? You guessed it Liza, Thomas. He handed me a to go cup of Earl Grey and then strode right in like he owned the place.

“Messier than I expected.” was all he said before settling himself at my desk, spreading his notes across my own and launching into his take on the case.

He can be quite captivating when he puts his mind to it, and despite wanting to tell him off for barging in, the longer he talked, the more clear it became that our talents would go better together, and the only way I could get this project done on time would be if we worked together.

So I let him stay, and we have spent the last two days together working day and night trying to finish this. It seems to be driving him mad that he can’t crack it as easily as he can most things in that class. I think that must be what is suddenly making him more tolerable.

Only eight days til I see you, dear cousin. Love always,

Audrey Rose

--

Audrey Rose!!!

You are so smitten!!! When I tell you I canNOT!!! Don’t even try to deny it Audrey Rose!

I have, of course, been keeping Daci in the loop about you and Thomas’ whole “will they or won’t they” scene and she agrees with me that if his actions before hadn’t made it clear he was into you, what he pulled when he came to your room absolutely is. She says you should just make a move, and while I absolutely agree, I told her I bet you wouldn’t because that isn’t very you.

Prove us both wrong?

But even if nothing else comes of it, at least you will (hopefully) get everything done before I get in this weekend! I want every moment with you I can get! Daci and I have the whole thing planned out (of course your American band has made the schedule, Daci is very excited), you, me, her and her brother are going to be like a little posse this weekend, and it’s going to be amazing! And, if Thomas gets jealous you’re spending so much time with another man, you can just invite him. I don’t mind ;)

I’ll see you in six days Audrey!!!!

Love you to America and back,

Liza

--

Dear Liza,

I had not intended on writing you again before you visited, but a LOT happened tonight.

I penned this letter when I got back from Thomas’ room at three in the morning and honestly? The only reason I did was so that I wouldn’t think tonight’s events were some kind of strange fever dream.

We were in my room working on our midterm project to no avail, just as we have every night this week. It was infuriating. But then, suddenly I had this epiphany, and moved everything around, and it all made sense! I yanked Thomas over and I swear, he lit up like a firefly.

Before I knew what was happening, Liza, he had taken me in his arms and pressed his lips to mine. He tasted like chocolate, which mostly attribute to the mocha he’d been nursing all evening.It was the best kiss I have ever had, he put Will Blackburn from high school to shame, but he pulled away much too quickly.

His cheeks were flushed and his eyes had a mix of hunger and nerves. He opened his mouth, I can only assume to apologize, but before he could get a word out, my desire overcome me. I let my hands run through his curls as we kissed again, and as soon as it was clear I wanted it as much as he did, he was lifting me up and pressing me against the wall. My shirt was off faster than you can say “abracadabra” and his lips were making a sweet trail down my collar bone to my chest as I fumbled with the buttons on his shirt.

I had finally gotten his shirt off, and was running my hands over his abs, my legs wrapped around his waist as he left little love bites on my collar bones and upper chest until suddenly, I heard Illy’s voice outside and her key jingling in the door.

And then, the fire in my core was replaced with icy panic. Luckily, Thomas managed to get into the bathroom before she came in, and I managed to pull my shirt back on before Illy got in the door. I explained as casually as I could that Thomas was on his way out, he had just needed to use the bathroom.

When he reentered the room a few moments later, I was so worried he would give us away, but he looked perfectly put together. BUT LIZA THIS IS WHERE THINGS TRULY GOT INSANE!

HE GREETED ILLY LIKE AN OLD FRIEND!!!

Because apparently?? Thomas’ sister is Illy’s ex, and none other than Daciana Cresswell, your mother fucking roomate.

When I tell you I was floored Liza, I mean it.

Then this boy had the audacity to leave like nothing had happened. But at this point, I had nothing to lose, so after a few moments sorting through details and getting caught up with Ileana, I went up to his room to confront him.

He explained he had put it together when he saw me and Uncle because his sister had been telling him about you, her flatmate named Eliza Wadsworth.

You’d think I would be more upset that he had kept me in the dark, wouldn’t you? But surprisingly, I was not. I guess you were right, Liza. I think I have been smitten since he first stumbled down the steps at orientation.

He seemed nervous I would be angry he had held out on me, but when I told him I wasn’t, it’s like he let down a facade and suddenly he was a whole new person. Unfortunately there wasn’t much fooling around after that (besides the considerable ass grabbing that came with my kiss goodnight) because we both agreed finishing the midterm to be most important that way we can spend the most time with you guys this weekend.

He walked me back to my room despite me insisting he didn’t have to, and taunted me with another kiss, and the promise of taking me on a real date tomorrow night, ‘in the time we would have spent on the project you so brilliantly solved tonight’.

I cannot wait to see you, dearest cousin.

Love,

Audrey Rose Wadsworth

Ps- I will be with Thomas when he picks you up on Thursday night :)

~~~~~

Hope you all enjoyed! This is probably my favorite fic I have ever written!!!! I have decided it is going to inspire a tiny mini series of fic’s, so there will be at least two more coming 

Thanks, as always, for reading, and let me know if you want to be tagged as I post the next ones in this series

xx

[aerisleis-fics]

Coping Mechanisms

Notes: So this is based on this post  by @bnhahc. If you check the notes on it you’ll see the conversation split in half LOL but this version has at least a summary of the other one so here we go. This was super fun to write and I would be in no way shocked if the idea made it into other stories of mine.

It started shortly after they all moved into the dorms. At first it was one or two of them coincidentally bumping into each other while trying to make tea, or move around to work off the nervous energy they felt. Questions were never asked about why the other one was down there. Over the days as they prepared for the provisional license exam it only got more prevalent.

It seemed like every night there were more of them down there, usually not acknowledging each other at all. It became a habit to leave the lights on in the common area downstairs, because honestly there was always someone there.

A day or two before the exam was the first time Bakugo found himself among them. The blond wasn’t precisely prepared for the fact that there were no less than six people scattered around the common area, mostly ignoring one another. Kirishima met his gaze - he was the only one to do so - and joined him in the kitchen.

“Quite the damn sleepover down here.”

“Oh it’s always like this.” Kirishima’s words were so matter-of-fact that it caught Bakugo off guard. “Almost everyone comes down sometimes. Only you and Shouto and Deku haven’t so far. … Well, now just the last two.”

Bakugo made a disgusted noise in the back of his throat, dismissively. But some part of him was surprised that it was so widespread. If they had all started coming down here for the same reason he had… well. “The fuck is this about?”

Kirishima shrugged. “We don’t ask each other that. Prying isn’t manly.” A pause, and then much quieter. “But it’s nice, not being alone.”

Bakugo rolled his eyes but for once bit back the angry retort. “Do you want tea shitty hair?”

“If you’re already planning to make some, please.”

********************

It was the night after his house arrest ended that Izuku found himself slipping down the hall through the darkness, intending to get a bit of air in the courtyard or something, anything to clear his head.

He didn’t expect all the lights to be on in the common area. He certainly didn’t expect to see a solid number of his classmates sitting scattered around the area. Deku almost slipped back into the elevator and went back to his room, unwilling to intrude, and unwilling to share, but Iida seemed to notice him then and motioned once from across the room.

Izuku sat down not far away from where Iida sat with Ochako half asleep against him. He didn’t say anything to either of them, not wanting to wake her back up entirely, but he did allow himself to take some small comfort in their presence, even as he sat with his knees drawn up to his chest and his gaze unfocused - his mind a thousand miles away.

********************

Aizawa normally did his rounds earlier than this, but he’d been on patrol until now. As a result of when he normally did his rounds, he was normally already back in his room before any of the students had come back down into the commons. As such, he was caught off guard when he slipped into the space and noticed no less than eight of them scattered around.

Most weren’t speaking, weren’t acknowledging each other at all. They were just there. He wondered why for a moment or two, practiced eye skimming over the lot of them. They hadn’t noticed him yet, or at least most of them hadn’t.

Momo was looking straight at him, fingers braiding and unbraiding a small piece of hair. She seemed to decide something and rose, moving across the room with the grace of a cat - and managed to make it all the way to where he stood by the door without any of her classmates looking up to see what she was doing.

“I ask that if this is deemed to be against the rules that none of us be punished.” Her voice was low, and quiet. “The curfew rule is specifically worded as to forbid us from leaving the dorm building, but says nothing specifically about remaining within our respective bedrooms. If that’s wrong I ask that the rule change be posted and this be overlooked because -”

“Hush.” He raised one hand to silence the rest of whatever she was going to say. “You’re correct, the rules don’t forbid this sort of behavior. None of you are in trouble.” Admittedly Aizawa had not anticipated this sort of behavoir as being something that needed to be restricted in the first place.

On the other hand, after a moment or two of reflection, he understood precisely what was happening here. And he had to acknowledge that he was probably a fool for not seeing it before. They were, ultimately, still children no matter how hard they were trying to become pro heroes. “How often does this happen?”

“Well…” Momo seemed to hesitate to answer the question. He said nothing, but continued meeting her gaze levelly, refusing to back down. “I’m usually down here at least once or twice a week, and there’s pretty much always at least one or two people here.” Momo answered slowly, realizing he wasn’t going to let her get away with not answering.

“Just this group, or different every time?”

“I’ve… seen pretty much the entire class down here at one point or another.”

Aizawa had a headache already just thinking about how to address this with each of them. No there had to be a better way than trying to coax twenty students with vastly different issues through dealing with them. Never mind these were things they would definitely need to master as pro heroes. There weren’t enough hours in a day -

Unless… hm. “I’m going upstairs. If this has been going on this long without my knowledge, I’m going to assume none of you will burn down the dorms before morning.”

********************

Aizawa sat quietly as his fellow faculty filed into the space.

“Something on your mind Eraserhead?” It was somewhat predictable that it would be Hizashi that noticed his extreme focus first.

Aizawa waved him off, and the voice hero settled into his place without arguing.

The meeting went as they often did, and he kept quiet throughout, offering his thoughts only occasionally as usual.

“Did you have something you wanted to bring to the table, Shouta?” It was Nezu who asked, as the meeting was winding down.

“I think it would be wise if we extended the counseling we discussed following the training camp attack. That portion served its purpose, of course, the testing was important, but… I think the students would benefit from more regular access to similar services beyond what Hound Dog is able to provide.”

“Are there specific students you have concerns about?” Nemuri asked, cocking her head slightly to one side.

“The majority of my homeroom, if I’m being frank. They are displaying coping behaviors that, for the moment, are keeping things under control enough they might continue to slide under the radar, I have concerns that they won’t be enough forever. If it were one or two I would handle it on the side on my own, but with it being so many, I can’t help but wonder if there are students well beyond 1-A that are so adversely affected.”

“I must concur with Shouta.” Sekijiro added after a moment or two. “This years students have been under a great deal more strain than is average, even for UA. It may be helpful for us to provide them with the sort of support they would normally get on their own if they need it, seeing as we’re now a boarding school and they require special permission to leave the grounds regularly.”

It was somewhat comforting to have the 1-B homeroom teacher backing him up. He wasn’t overreacting.

It wouldn’t happen overnight, Nezu would have to consider it and decide if it was beneficial enough for a broad enough section of students. But Aizawa thought it was likely that it was something that would be done, at least on a temporary basis, as he heard the discussion and agreement of the other teachers.

********************

Bonus Scene

[It was written platonically but if Tododeku of any form bothers you skip this section]

Shouto wasn’t sure how he’d ended up a part of this. But here he was, sitting on the end of one couch with his legs pulled up off the floor staring into space. On the other end o the couch, last he’d been aware, was Izuku, doodling in one of his notebooks.

“Oy. Icyhot.” Shouto’s head jerked around so he was staring at the blond by the elevator, glaring as he did so. “Should wake up Deku before he rolls off the couch.” The blond then moved his hand and let the elevator close before anyone in the commons could say anything else about it.

It was a bit of a breach of the unspoken rules where none of them really acknowledged one another, or acknowledged the reasons they were all here at this ridiculous hour, but as Shouto’s gaze drifted from the elevator to the boy he was sitting closest to, he understood. While everyone had been looking at them when Bakugo broke their reverie, they shifted back to minding their own business. That was… for the best.

His right hand loosely wrapped around Izuku’s shoulder, shaking the smaller boy gently. “Midoriya.”

The smaller boy woke with a muffled gasp as he tried to steady his own breathing. “Shouto I’m sorry I -” His voice was low, obviously trying not to garner any additional attention.

“Shh. It’s fine.”

He settled back to his original place on the couch, and then looked over at Izuku, still half-curled where he’d been napping. “Come here.”

Izuku looked confused for several seconds, but eventually did as he was asked. Shouto shifted them both around until they were settled into a reasonably comfortable position, with Izuku half leaning against Shouto’s body.

No, Shouto wasn’t sure how he’d ended up a part of this at all, but he was glad that he had. Because in the smallest things, like offering a friend comfort, there was healing.