#so this is VERY self indulgent I'll admit it

[never-rxne]

─── YOU BELIEVE THAT I'M IN PAIN, HELP ME DISASSOCIATE.

18+ minors dni please!

sevika x reader. takes place in canon - 1x07, after the chem-baron assembly. || 2.3k words

content tags: light angst. character study. no established relationship/friends with benefits/queerplatonic dynamic. reader is gender neutral (men this is NOT for you). smut: oral sex, fingering, multiple orgasms, top!reader and receiving!sevika.

summary: after hearing about jinx's stunts, you go to check up on sevika and find her stressed, losing hope in her value to the cause. if words aren't enough to show her her worth, you'll show it through actions.

notes: i DON'T write smut normally, but i was rewatching s1 and the way sevika was treated just pissed me off and made me so sad. have this self indulgent fic as a little pride month/sevika week special... topping sevika would fix me tbh

"i'll be thinking about you while you're down there being a doll it's either a curse or a blessing every time that you call." — King Princess. "Fantastic"

Word goes fast around the Lanes. Faster still when it concerns Silco and his people. His lackeys had leaked the rumor, swept around the fissures until the name Sevika was dropped in your ear. By then, the story had been worn down into a wide-known joke.

You didn’t believe it at first. The situation sounded outlandish. Silco’s right hand found tied up? Defenseless? Painted over with messages? If you knew anything about Sevika, it was her strength. This was the woman who dispatched three armed thugs at the harbor without even being grazed. The very idea of her being double-crossed and subdued enough to be bound was ridiculous. 

Had there been multiple attackers? Had she been drugged? Were they after information? 

Was she a target? 

You don’t want to admit it to yourself, how much it worries you. How the rising tensions between Topside and the Undercity have gotten your thoughts straying to Sevika once too often for your liking. 

You decide, at last, that it’s long past time to pay Sevika a visit. 

Never mind the fact that you haven’t seen her in months. 

The two of you were never the type to cling to each other. Each of you were committed to your own businesses—Sevika on the cause of Zaun’s independence, you on your work for the education of children of the Undercity. Since youth Sevika was the one looking up, you with your eyes on the ground. Your areas of work differed, but your dreams pointed the same way. 

Then things had gone sideways when Shimmer began to poison the streets. When Sevika herself started using it. Every rare occasion you met up with her had ended in an argument. Gradually, there came a mutual agreement to stop meeting up at all for a while. 

But this…this is different. You need to see her. 

Need to make sure she’s okay. 

——

She almost didn’t even let you in her apartment room at first. 

“Don’t act like such a kid,” you say. “Open the door, Sevika.” 

You can hear the metal clinking at the table. You imagine you can almost hear her measured breathing, waiting for you to leave. 

But she’s met her match in stubbornness. You rap your knuckles smartly against the door. 

“I know you’re in there.” 

A heavy sigh. The creak of a chair pushed back. Seconds later, the door swings open, and Sevika frowns down at you in the weak light of the hall. Her prosthetic arm is off, you can see it lying on the table behind her. There are stains of Shimmer on her clothes, on her boots. Her face bears healing traces of a recent fight. 

“What do you want?” Sevika says shortly. 

You raise an eyebrow. “Missed you, too.”

She huffs. “Not likely.” 

But she steps back and lets you in. 

——

Now you stand in the dimly lit room, arms crossed and leaning against the table, which is sticky from old spilled drinks. Watching her as she paces the floor restlessly. 

You’re certain Sevika hasn’t told you the half of it, but you don’t push it any further. 

She won’t tell you the assailant. Won’t tell you if she was outnumbered or drugged. You know if you overstepped, asked one question too many, she’d shut you out entirely. So you listen. You listen to her rant about the unproductive assembly, how Silco had done nothing but intimidate the other Chem-barons, how everything was at a standstill. 

“The point isn’t that the sister is back,” Sevika says. “It’s that the enterprise is losing steam. Business slows, everything’ll come crashing down sooner or later. And he isn’t doing anything about it.” 

“What does Silco care about the girl anyway?” You ask. 

She pauses. Looks back at you. “What do you care?” she says. 

Her question catches you so off-guard you can’t even form an answer at first. At last you say, “—what?”

She gestures at you. “Last time we saw each other you said you didn’t care what we did anymore. Said we were all driving down the same path to hell with this Shimmer business.”

It actually takes you a moment to recall what she’s talking about. It was something you said in the heat of the last argument months ago, something you’re certain Sevika gave no definitive answer to at the moment. You’re stunned she’s actually listened. That it cut her deep enough, apparently, for her to throw it back in your face now.  

But the truth is, she didn’t remember it right. Or she did, and she’s deliberately rephrasing. 

The truth is, you had said you didn’t care what she did. 

You were furious at the time. Furious and scared. Scared of what she was doing to herself. Scared that she would run herself to the ground, that she wouldn’t stop working for the cause, giving herself to the cause, her damn fucking cause, until she was used up, nothing left. 

You were scared of losing her. 

And in the moment, you hated her for making you so scared. Making you care so much when she hardly seemed to think about anything other than the revolution. 

You watch her expression, and realize she looks more tired than you remember. Worn down. She hasn’t stopped working since you parted ways. Hasn’t stopped once, even through pitfall after pitfall. Setback after setback.

“I still think the same about Shimmer,” you tell her. “But I also think you don’t need to carry the weight of all of Zaun on your shoulders.”

She scoffs. “Who says I am?” Her eyes stray to the table, to her broken prosthetic arm. “I’m like a cog running in exactly the same place. Fucking useless place.” 

“Hey.” 

“Why are you here?” she asks with a tired sigh. “Why show up again after all this time?” 

“Sevika,” you say. 

“You don’t care what I do. Never did. I know you,” she says, beginning to pace again. “You’re like me. Focused on the finished machine, not the tools it took to build it.”

You reach out. Stop her in her movements. Place your hand on her scarred cheek, forcing her to look at you. 

“Listen to me, you tall dumbass,” you say in a low voice. “You’re doing enough. You’re doing more than enough.” 

She scoffs, tries to brush you away. You reach up so that both your hands cradle her face. Press your thumbs firmly against her cheekbones so she can’t flee from you. 

“You hear me?” 

“What’re you doing?” she asks gruffly. 

“Making you see your worth.” 

Her brows crease, eyes narrowing. “You messing with me?” 

“Do you see it?” 

“Stop fucking around.”

You don’t break the gaze. Even though you can tell she wants you to. Even as she tries to pull away. Your eyes burn into hers until she’s dropping her gaze, until her eyes are dancing down toward your lips, darting back up. Until you feel her falter, until you see her expression—ever so slightly—soften.

You kiss her. 

She’s frozen against you at first. You can feel the stillness of her body, the tension in her squared shoulders. A fraction of a second, a quiet hesitation. 

Then she kisses you back. The tension drains out of her with a shudder. Something breaks in you as you feel her groan a little into your mouth. 

You can tell now this is what she has needed. Not words. Not another argument. Not another person expecting her to be in control. You press your hands against her shoulders, bringing her closer. Guiding her. 

“It’s okay,” you whisper against her lips. “I got you, it’s okay.” 

“Can we… can you….”

“Yeah, yeah,” you say breathlessly. “Yeah, okay.” 

You pull back, leading her down the narrow passageway that leads into the one bedroom. You could find your way around this place in your sleep. From the empty bottles scattered on the floor to the smell of cigarette smoke clinging to the stained wallpaper, this is Sevika. This is the woman you have known, the woman you have forgiven and admired and hated and loved all your life. 

In the bedroom. Stumbling over your feet as you kiss her again. You back her against the wall, push your leg between her thighs. She laughs slightly as your fingers clumsily undo the buttons of her vest. You pull it off her, tossing it to the floor. You snake your hands beneath the fabric of her undershirt. She raises her one arm to let you pull it over her head. 

Her scars. Thin glowing rivulets of blue webbed over the left side of her face, her neck, her muscular torso. The scars you had known her to avoid looking at, the scars you had known her to hate being touched by anyone but you. The scars you kiss now, softly, feeling the familiar odd electrical current against your lips. Your hand massages her breast as you press your lips to her neck, biting softly at her jawline. With a soft moan, Sevika tilts her head back against the wall. 

Lowering yourself to your knees, you undo the clasp of her belt. Her breathing changes as you undress her, as she leans her hand against your shoulder and steps out of her pants, bare before you. Vulnerable. 

This is Sevika, every inch of her. From the explosion’s scars to the bruises from old street fights to the stretch marks on her thighs and knees. From the packed muscles of her broad back to the moles dotting her brown skin, you are the only person in the world she has shown herself to this way, with trusting abandon. 

A second to breathe. You meet her eyes.   

“Okay?” You whisper. She nods. 

You pull off your own clothes in half a second. You’re on your knees again, you’re kissing the place just beneath her navel, the muscles of her abdomen seizing, the place that you’d be lying if you said you’ve never stared at before. 

Her pussy is familiar, waiting, already wet when your mouth finds her. She can’t suppress the soft grunts of pleasure as your tongue licks against her folds, and you can’t suppress the moan that escapes you when her taste hits your senses. 

Janna above, you’ve missed her more than you thought. 

She parts her legs for you, opening wider for you, and your head reels. 

“Fuck. Fuck…just like that…god…”

The hitch in her breath, the break in her deep voice. The moans she suppresses, her pride still battling her for all it’s worth, keeping her from letting herself fall over the edge, holding her back.

Damned if you can’t remedy that. 

Your tongue works faster into her. You lick greedily, reverently, as if you’re devouring something both sacred and ruined. Her hand on the back of your head, firm and warm and large, pulling you closer to her, leading you where she needs you. You dig your fingers into the muscles of her thighs, drunk on the taste of her, drunk on the way she trembles against your head, her heavy breaths melting into the stagnant air. 

She comes with a dazzling groan, filling your mouth, arching her spine, her head knocking back against the wall. 

You pull away, satisfied—for the moment. It’s a testament to her strength that Sevika is still standing, holding herself up, breathing slow through the aftershocks of her climax. 

“On your back,” you say. 

“I’m good.” 

“You sure?” 

She cuts her gaze at you, and her hazy eyes give her away. 

“Tonight’s about you, Vika.” 

She huffs at your old nickname for her. Always pretended it irritated her, but then why does it make her sway into you, why does it make her pull you to the bed? 

Your hands on her hips, easing her down onto the mattress. 

“You’re wrong, by the way,” you murmur against her skin as you slot yourself between her legs, as you part her thighs. “I do care.” 

“Hmm?” 

Your fingers slide along the folds of her still-sensitive clit, making her twitch. Before you enter her you kiss her mound again, softly, feeling the wiry hairs of her bush against your lips. 

“I care about you. Not what you do. Not what you mean to Zaun.” 

Sevika says nothing. So you prove it to her. 

You part her with two of your fingers, you slide into her, your tongue still making rough little circles against her core. Her hips buck against you. The little desperate sounds that slip out of her mouth invite you deeper, your wrist moving in rhythmic thrusts. 

She comes faster the second time. Her pussy spasms against your mouth, and you can feel your own arousal coil hot in the pit of your stomach from seeing her throbbing clit, seeing her beautiful face lost in her pleasure, feeling her pulse race along with yours. 

“Can you give me one more, handsome?” 

“If you can take it from me,” she growls, and you laugh because her voice has all the conviction of a kitten masquerading as a lion. 

—— 

After.

Sevika is spent, head thrown back. The sweat cooling on your neck. Outside, the streets of Zaun clatter and howl with the sounds of passing automobiles and singing drunks.

“Woman,” you breathe huskily, “you’ll be the death of me.” 

Sevika tilts her head on the pillow. The dim glow of the lamp beside the bed casts a warm pink light over her face. Strands of sweaty dark hair that escaped her half-up are streaked against her forehead. She looks sleepily down at you through heavy-lidded eyes. Her lips curl up in a smirk, a low chuckle rumbles in her chest. 

She’s so fucking gorgeous. It makes you insane. 

“Not too bad yourself,” she says.

You give a sigh, fall forward and let your cheek rest on her warm stomach. 

You’ll get cleaned up later. You will stay the night, even if it is just for this one night, and more likely than not you’ll get into another argument with her. 

There will be coffee in the morning, though. 

There will be time for you to talk.

end note: yeah... dont say anything if this is god-awful because i'm already starting to hate it :/ there's a reason i don't write smut LMAO

[sweet-peachie]

Thinking about a yandere with a depressed darling.

A yandere who's patient with you no matter how bad it gets. On easier days, when it's just the lingering inexplicable sadness that has you staring off into space every now and then between conversations, he's quick to jump to another topic to distract your mind. When he sees your gaze lower and your brows pinch in thought, he makes your favorite meal under the guise of having been craving it himself. When you're both sitting on the couch and he sees your leg bounce, your fingers trembling against your thighs - he feigns tiredness and leans against you to 'absentmindedly' take your hand in his.

A yandere that on harder days, ones where you can't even muster up the energy to get up from your shared bed, stays there with you for hours on end. Arms wrapped around your waist and his face buried in your hair. If you're lying down, he'll let you rest against his chest and listen to the sound of his heartbeat - the soft sound lulling you into a state of calm. If you're sitting up, he'll keep his arms around you and gently rock the both of you back and forth, keeping his weight pressed against you to keep you grounded. You enjoy silence? No problem, he finds the quiet peaceful too. You need background noise to distract yourself from your thoughts? He's going on and on about anything and everything he can think of.

He tries his best to only leave your side for absolute necessities at the start of these periods. He knows that taking care of you when you're down makes you feel guilty, so he never makes it seem like he's only doing something just for you (even if he knows he is).

He's feeling pretty hungry. No worries though, he'll just go ahead and order some food from that restaurant you both (read: you) like. No, you don't have to get up from the bed to get it from the door, he needed to use the bathroom anyway so he'll just grab it on his way back!

(He was never really hungry. Hell, he could survive off of the smell of you alone if he could. But he'd be damned if you didn't get at least one full meal in today.)

A yandere that never judges you for your lack of motivation to take care of yourself sometimes. You don't feel like you can take a shower today? That's perfectly fine, a missed shower or two never hurt anyone! You felt too drained to brush your teeth before you went to sleep? That's alright, he's feeling pretty tired too so you're both in the same boat! Even if you're someone who prefers to eat in bed because you don't have the energy to eat at the dining table, he doesn't mind one bit. Crumbs aren't an issue for him, and having to wash the sheets is only a small sacrifice to make sure you're comfortable. Hell, if you didn't feel so iffy about it he'd even feed you if you asked.

A yandere that never in his wildest dreams would ever shame you for something you can't control. But, he does care about your health, of course, so he wouldn't allow you to skip too many days of hygiene without stepping in. One of his favorite things to do with you is shared self-care. If you don't take a shower that day, you can both just take one together the following day. He takes great care in washing you off, lathering your hair in your favorite scented shampoo and conditioner before turning around and letting you do the same to him. If you don't feel like brushing your teeth or washing your face that night, that's perfectly fine, he's already setting up a playlist for you two to dance to in front of the mirror when you both get it done tomorrow instead.

A yandere that, although he makes sure you're comfortable during your more difficult days, still wants to help you gradually recover. If your lack of motivation and tiredness spans over a few days or more, he'll slowly but surely coax you out of bed. First it starts out small, like using the restroom or grabbing something from the other side of the room. And then it moves on to leaving the room entirely, getting you to stay outside for longer and longer intervals until the emptiness is finally pushed to the back of your mind once again - dormant until the next time it rears its ugly head. But that's okay. Progress is slow, and it's far from perfect. And he'll tell you just how proud he is that you've taken a step further, no matter how small it may seem.

A yandere that doesn't consider you a burden for the way you feel. Who doesn't ask what caused your mood, even if the shift was sudden. Who doesn't judge you when you fall back into old habits (now, with larger intervals in between) - your hair getting tangled, your skin oily and your clothes stained. Because no matter what he'll be there with you every step of the way, and he'll happily help you up again and again.

[sysig]

Everything falls into place so nicely when they’re together (Patreon)

[butmakeitgayblog]

How's the canon fic going?

It's going good! I've got a squee read through who liked it and said it was very true to character which was a huge relief. Right now I have my hawk eyes on it so theu can catch my terrible grammar 🥴. Sorry for the wait but hopefully you'll think it's worth it 🤞

[azrielbrainrot]

Let Me Hold You

Pairing: Azriel x F!Reader

A/N: I'm still having awful writer's block and have been busy and not having a great time in my personal life so here's a very short and very self indulgent story.

The air was colder than you anticipated, wrapping your arms around yourself as the wind caressed the bare skin, raising goosebumps with its touch. You were ready to give up when the shadowsinger spoke up from his place sitting against the railing.

“Can I hug you?”

It takes you a moment to process the words, eyes widening slightly as you did. You'd think you heard him wrong if it weren't just the two of you on top of the roof, making it impossible to mistake the whispered words. In all the years you've known Azriel he had never asked something like this of you, or anyone, not so openly.

You followed him here because you noticed how upset he seemed at dinner, barely saying a word and keeping to himself even more than he usually did, but beyond a few encouraging words from you and a refusal to share his feelings from him, you had expected to go back to your room empty handed.

Azriel always seemed so intent on keeping his emotions to himself that it made you even more curious and worried for the reason he was feeling like this today. You weren't going to let that stop you though. Nevermind what happened, all that matters is that he needed you.

“Of course,” you answer quickly, perhaps a bit too loudly, especially in the quiet of the night and the vulnerability of the moment. You've always wished Azriel would let you or anyone else in at times like these, that he shared his problems or at least let someone comfort him.

A ghost of a smile appears on his face before you both reach for each other at the same time, kneeling down in front of him and letting him pull you closer, your arms wrapping around his neck as his circle your waist, his wings following suit and creating a cocoon around your melded bodies, his shadows joining in and effectively hiding you both from the outside world.

You let him hold onto you like it was his last lifeline. His face falling onto the crook of your neck, breath hitting your skin in unhurried pants, as you run your fingers through his hair, trying your best to give him the peace of mind he seems to be craving so badly.

Over the last few months, your relationship with Azriel seemed to have evolved into something else, something you were too scared to admit for now, not quite ready for such monumental feelings. Still, your heart stirred as he held you close, as his breath came out slower and his body relaxed against yours. You were happy to be a calm and comforting presence for him, it was all you needed actually.

“You don't have to tell me what's wrong,” you start, softly this time, careful not to disturb the air around you, “but I want you to know that whenever you feel like this and you just want someone to hold you, or listen to your worries and doubts, take a walk with you or even spar with to let out your frustrations, you can come to me.”

He stops for a second, letting your words sink in before he pulls his face away from the safe place he made for himself against your neck, never straying too far as he looks into your eyes, searching.

“I'll always be here for you,” you confirm softly, a smile playing at your lips, one that widens when he lets out a sigh, closing his eyes and leaning his forehead against yours, arms holding onto you even tighter than before, until you could feel his heart beating against yours.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

[mariasont]

Bumper to Bumper - A.H

a/n: this is so self-indulgent i am probably the worst fucking parker you've ever seen it's wild & i also just watched a vid of mgg parking someone's car and went feral so there's that

‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧

pairings: aaron hotchner x reader (i don't think there is any use of pronouns just nicknames like honey)

warnings: none? rough day, reader is beefing with parking, tooth-rotting fluff

wc: 800

"Hotchner," came his voice, rough like sandpaper across the line, as you fought back the swell of tears, your lower lip caught in the anxious trap of your teeth.

Your eyes fixed on the parking spot before you, the very sight of it forming a lump in your throat as your frustration mounted. The morning had unfolded like a series of unfortunate events--your coffee machine had sputtered its last, your favorite book left forgotten on the porch to be ruined by the rain, and now, this parking spot seemed to mock you, its yellow lines almost pulsating with contempt. 

Your hand glided across your dampened cheek, exhaling a shaky breath as you juggled the phone between your ear and shoulder. "You know, I don't think I've said this enough, but you're an exceptional boss. Honestly, you're—"

You sensed the sigh in his breath before he spoke. "What do you need?"

"I know I'm late," you managed to get out, a small hiccup halting your sentence as you did everything in your power to avoid crying, but the waver in your voice gave you away. "But I have a good reason--"

Once more, he stopped you mid-sentence, as he often did. "Where are you? Is everything okay?"  

"I'm fine, it's silly."

"If something's wrong, I want to hear it. What's happening?"

"I just... I can't seem to park my car," you choke out, cheeks aflame with mortification. "I've been trying and failing, over and over, it's embarrassing. The spot's too tight, and of course, it's the only one left because 'M late."

"Hold on, I'll be right there," he said, and the line went dead.

You were left staring at your phone, a fresh wave of embarrassment washing over you. You cringed, feeling smaller with each passing second, knowing he was swamped with work and here you were, unable to perform the simplest task of parking a car.

The moment you saw him step out of the building, your racing heart began to slow, his presence alone easing the knot of anxiety in your chest. He approached and opened the driver's door, and you were suddenly spilling over with apologies, the traces of tears still evident on your cheeks.

He looked at you with a gentleness that melted away the last of your defenses, reassuring you with a simple. "It's okay. I got it."

He took your place behind the wheel and parked the car with ease. As you stood there, you realized how his unwavering steadiness had become a pillar you leaned on more often than you'd like to admit. 

As he stepped out of the car, you approached, your voice barely above a whisper, "Thank you, and I'm sorry. I know it's such a small thing..."

He gave a slight sigh, one that seemed to brush away your concerns, a hint of a smile in his eyes and said, "There's nothing to apologize for. Don't be so hard on yourself," he reminded you gently, his hand coming to rest on the soft of your shoulder. 

A silent nod was all you could muster as you lifted your gaze to meet his. Your eyes were still red-rimmed from crying, and your nose, slightly pink from the number of tissues you had abused this morning. In a soft plea, you murmured, "Can I have a hug?"

Without a word, he simple open his arms, an unspoken invitation that you immediately accepted. As you nestled into his arms, your body relaxing as you inhaled his familiar scent. A soft sniffle escaped you as Hotch quietly said, "Five senses..."

You closed your eyes and focused on the sensory details--the comforting touch, his reassuring voice, the sight of his concerned gaze when you opened your eyes, the taste of the air mingled with his cologne, and the grounding scent of him. As your breathing evened out, he gently placed his hand on the pulse point at your neck, counting your heart rate in his mind. 

You stepped back, a sheepish grin spreading across your face. "I suppose driving school is next on my training agenda?"

Hotch's expression softened into a subtle smile. "I'd agree, considering I just got you that car, I'd prefer it if you got the chance to enjoy it first before crashing it," he teased back lightly. "You sure you're okay?" he asked, his eyes searching yours.

"Promise."

Hotch glanced at his watch, a decision forming in his eyes. "I think I can free up some time later. How about we get you another copy of your book?"

As your smile broke through the clouds of your frustration, it was as if the sun had pierced through the overcast sky of his day, bathing him in a light he never wanted to leave. "Really?" you responded, practically glowing with delight.

Hotch's heart swelled at the sight, feeling lighter than he had in ages. Gently, he cupped your face, drawing you closer to plant a tender kiss on your forehead. "I love you, honey," he said, his voice a low rumble.

You giggled, a little surprised by the public display of affection, you blushed, responding with a shy, "Love you too."

[wonwoonlight]

always with you | jeon wonwoo

➝ Wonwoo x fem!Reader (ft: Jisoo, Karina (Yoo Jimin), Jeonghan, Soonyoung, etc.)

➝ word count: 10k (lol) // non-idol!au // childhood friends to ?? // idiots to ???? // angst if u squint

➝ not inspired by this song but i was listening to "your love" by Jisoo and it fits <////3

➝ warning: food, responsible alcohol consumption lol, theyre pining idiots, kisses mwah. i want THIS. this is me projecting. not proofread.

a/n: hi. this has been sitting in my draft for months and i willed myself to finish this before the loml enlists. to my muse, jeon wonwoo, i'll always be here for u <3 i didnt expect this to reach 10k. i do Not Know what this is. pls bare w me and my self indulgence. enjoy <3

your love feels like the rain, feels like a song i used to know. (your love - jisoo)

It’s weird, what you have with Jeon Wonwoo.

It feels like you’ve always known him–with him being your neighbor and all. But it’s not until university that you actually get to know the guy as a friend, which is funny because Wonwoo attended a prestigious university in Seoul and you ended up living abroad in Japan.

Looking back, Wonwoo has always been in your life even when you’re nothing but neighbors and school mates. You’d even go home together from time to time, sharing polite conversations that didn’t really have substance nor anything too personal. So how did you even get closer to him after you were apart rather than when you were physically close to each other?

It went like: Wonwoo went to Japan for his first solo trip and your mom made him bring you stuff and she made you bring him around because ‘it’s the least you could do after troubling him’.

You didn’t mind, of course. As much as you were not very close with Wonwoo, you still considered him… something (ha!) and he’s not the worst to be around. Plus, you might or might not feel a little embarrassed because your mom made him bring so much stuff for you. You imagined a third of his luggage was full because of yours. Bringing him around and treating him food really was the least you could do.

“You’re more… bright.” You remember Wonwoo told you that first night. 

“Oh?” 

“Mhm. It’s nice to see.”

You’ve never really been quiet, if you’re to be completely honest. But you suppose you’d never been around each other enough, nor your circle of friends clash, for him to know this at that point. 

Plus, you had to admit living by yourself in another country did change you. 

That was the first time you ever sat down to talk with him, which led to more and more meals, and you joining him whenever you could until Wonwoo left back to Korea. 

“Text me once you've landed?” You had said, almost hesitant. Now that his trip ended, you wondered if what you shared with him was nothing but a fleeting closeness generated out of proximity. But when Wonwoo smiled and proceeded to send you pictures that he took during the trip not ten minutes after you left the airport, your heart settled in content, recognizing the sign of a new friend you would get to keep around.

It’s not until a few months later you got to see him again when you went back home for Christmas. You hadn’t been able to ask if he’d go down to Changwon or stay in Seoul for the holiday, and you got your answer when you saw him in your family house the moment you arrived. 

It was weird, the way your heart picked up a little when he looked up and grinned at your arrival. You didn’t want to think much of it though, so you simply waved and asked what he’s doing in your living room. Naturally, it’s your mom who answered, fussing about your rude question, how thin you had gotten (it’s her favorite phrase, one that doesn’t hold much meaning because she says this to anyone she hasn’t seen in a long time–even when you’re pretty sure you’ve gained weight), and added that Wonwoo was in your house because his parents were on a trip and would return in a few days, so your mom took the rein and decided to feed the poor guy whenever she could.

“Let me help you with that.” He didn’t wait for your answer, simply took your luggage and urged you to move upstairs to your room. “What did you even have here?”

“Lots and lots of snacks.” You grinned sheepishly. You let him put your luggage into your room, letting the door open as you told him to sit because you had something for him. “I didn’t know you’d be around so I was just going to leave this to Auntie, but now that you’re here…”

“Oh?” He looked intrigued at your words. In the way of things, of course you didn’t end up being best friends after spending a week with each other. It’s not that easy. That, together with the fact that Wonwoo is not the texting type while you’re definitely one, resulted in you texting each other on random intervals.

He would reply to your instagram story or you, his, and you’d end up talking about something else at some point, until he took forever to reply and you ended up not replying because you simply forgot to.

Still, you would smile to yourself when you see his name popping up in your phone, and you end up with a friendship you didn’t have before despite having known each other for almost fifteen years at that point in time.

“Yeah! Look at this!” It’s a cat shaped keyring that you showed him, colored in deep purple and a pair of glasses perched on its small nose. It looked annoyed. “I saw this and thought of you.”

Wonwoo wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

But the fact that you thought of him and bought something for him just because stirred something within him that he didn’t know how to feel either. You babbled about some snacks you bought for him too because he seemed to enjoy them, along with new ones that you thought he would like.

“I also got something for your brother, should I just… leave it to you?”

He paused at that, once again unsure how to handle the way his mind blanked at your words. Had you always been this attentive to his family? Had anyone ever done this for him? If you noticed the way he took a moment to answer this simple question, you didn’t say anything about it.

“Yeah, sure.” 

Your trip back home for the holiday lasted for a total of ten days. In the natural order of things, you spent about eight days in Wonwoo’s presence because your other friends didn’t return to Changwon, and Wonwoo’s…well, he didn’t have a lot of friends to begin with, and his close friend went on a family trip to Europe. The two days you didn’t spend with him was because: (1) you caught a bad case of flu and refused to see anyone; and, (2) You’re returning to Japan at ungodly hours in the morning (re: it’s at 10, but you needed to wake up at 4 in the morning because you had to take the train to Busan to get to the airport and you’re anxious like that) so you obviously couldn’t see him on your last day. 

As you waited by yourself in the airport, you stared at Wonwoo’s text telling you to have a safe flight.

It’s not a crush, what you had for him. But you tried to imagine if you would mind dating him and the answer was: no, you would not. Wonwoo’s a good person, he shared the same humor code as you, you seemed to be able to communicate well, and he already knew your family. And, well, if you’re being completely honest, he really was your type in the visual department. (Those glasses. Fuck.)

If you were to think about why you wouldn't date him, it would be because he's a little tad too quiet. You imagined the both of you would suck at communicating your feelings because you're also stupid when it comes to that.

Would that be a dealbreaker?

[1 New Message(s) from Jeon Wonwoo]

You blinked at the notification. 

Wait. 

Fuck.

Were you actually, seriously thinking about dating Jeon Wonwoo?

Your phone pinged again with a new notification, Wonwoo's name beaming at you.

You remember biting your lip so hard to stop yourself from smiling you almost bled.

It's been roughly two years since that fateful night you found yourself hanging out with Wonwoo.

No.

He is not currently your boyfriend.

He’s also currently not your best friend.

You're still living in Japan after your graduation about a year ago, and Wonwoo is in Singapore for a three-month long training workshop that his company provides for.

The two of you exist in a bizarre plane of exclusivity that isn't romantic but not not romantic either.

You know Wonwoo doesn't text people in general. But he regularly texts you to the point where his parents would ask you to tell him to reply to their messages, or would just text you so you'd forward the message to him.

You don’t talk to him on a daily basis, but you’re pretty sure you’re still one of the very handful people Wonwoo talks to the most. Which is something because sometimes you'd go a month or two not talking to each other.

Additionally, you don’t think he has any other female close friends other than you, which annoys you a little because you’ve been wanting to find out if the way he talks to you and treats you is the same way he would to another friend or if it’s something… more.

Jimin says he’s definitely into you. She might not know the guy personally, but she’s heard enough and she insists that there’s no way that someone like Wonwoo (or what you paint of him) would even text you this often and spend that much time with you if he’s not interested.

Jisoo does not agree. She says if he's really interested in pursuing something with you, then he would’ve made it clear that he did. He wouldn't drag you through this grey area that is your exclusivity, and she's been giving you shit because is this exclusivity even a two way street or have you been dodging dates because of him only to find out Wonwoo hasn't been considering you the same way?

“He likes her stories when she uploads selfies!” Jimin argues on his behalf–why, you’d never know.

“Duh. So what? He still doesn’t ask her out on dates.” Jisoo rolls her eyes, not easily bought after all this time.

“Perhaps the fact that she lives abroad doesn't make that easy?”

“I live abroad.” Jisoo stares at Jimin in challenge. “My boyfriend lives in Seoul and we're still doing fine. What's his reason?”

Sometimes Jeonghan would be present during this neverending topic and would occasionally join the discussion just to fuel the fire, or would otherwise play with his phone because he’s not all that invested like the two girls are.

“I would never like someone’s selfies on stories if I’m not interested.” He gives them a piece of his mind as a guy, like it actually matters, but Jimin’s smile in triumph does not last long. “But Jisoo’s right. He’d make it obvious if he wanted you. Liking your stories doesn't mean shit.”

“He visits here regularly enough, though!!” Jimin still tries to make a case. “Really, it's about time we meet him. Why are you not letting us meet him?”

You sigh as you rub your temple. You don’t even know how this discussion starts again. Probably because you’ve simply said ‘Singapore seems nice’ and that turns into ‘why are you suddenly talking about Singapore?’ which snowballs to ‘Wonwoo’s texting you again?’.

Which brings you here.

“I’m… not even that into him.” You shake your head at them. “I told you guys once that I wouldn’t mind dating him. Not that I’m in love with him.”

Jimin waves her hand dismissively. “It’s all the same for you.”

“Can’t disagree with her there.” Jisoo crunches her nose in distaste. “You’re not interested in anyone. The fact that he’s the only guy you ever talk about constantly for the last two years is… something. He’s handsome, I’ll give you that. Seems nice, too. Plus, your family and his family approves of the two of you. I just don’t like how he’s stringing you along.”

“He’s not–”

“He is.” Jeonghan cuts you off. “He might not be doing it on purpose, but he is stringing you along. Why are you not going out on dates when you’ve been complaining that you’re lonely?”

“Because it’s awkward?” You try to reason. The face they give you would be funny if it isn’t directed to you. “No one asks me on dates? Hello?”

That’s not a lie; you’re not exactly one that gets rained on date invitations. But that’s not the complete truth either, because you know your friends are more than happy to set you up on dates (and, if you’re to be completely honest, Jeonghan has a friend that’s been asking about you and he actually approves of the guy, so…) but you’ve been telling them no because you just… don’t feel like going.

It doesn’t feel right.

Apparently, Jeonghan isn't in the mood to entertain you and decides to cut through the case.  “Yeah, but it’s not awkward to meet Wonwoo everyday and hang out privately when you can, right?”

You pout at him, to which he simply flicks your forehead in return. Jeonghan has never really been the type to join your ‘girl talks’ when it happens around him, preferring his peace, and if Yoon Jeonghan himself has decided to actually sit down and talk to you seriously then you know you’re screwed because there’s no way out of it. 

“I’m not buying that. Perhaps you’re not in love with him now. But you’re holding out because of him and that means you have enough feelings for the guy, or you’re expecting something to happen between the two of you.”

“Do you think he's also holding out because you live abroad?”

At this point, you don’t even know what you feel for Jeon Wonwoo.

Have you really been holding out because of him?

It’s not like the two of you are actually exclusive; you both just happen to be friendlier than friends are supposed to be but not exactly lovers. You wouldn’t call it situationship either, because you don't flirt nor send mixed signals to each other.

Sure, you'd sleep over in his place when you go to Seoul and he'd insist on picking you up when it gets too late because you don't notice the time. And, yeah, sure, Wonwoo visits Tokyo at least once every three months and he'd also sleep in your place because why would he spend money on accommodation when your sofa is so comfortably available?

Does it matter that you would never let anyone sleep in your place, not even your own sibling, and that Wonwoo hates anyone touching his bed but lets you sleep there because ‘you're the guest and of course I want you comfortable'?

Nope. 

Definitely not.

“It's really not that hard.” Soonyoung, one of the very few people in your circle that's not emotionally constipated and knows both you and Wonwoo, tells you before. “Imagine him doing all those things to someone else. Would you be pissed?”

You do not like the answer to that. But Soonyoung does not care and he doesn't wait for your answer. He happily steals your french fries and slurps on your cola as he forces you into admitting your feelings in the most straightforward way possible.

“If the answer is yes, then you're into him. If no, then you're fucking lying and I don't believe you.”

You jump at the notification on your phone, eyebrows rising beyond your bangs when you see who's calling.

Incoming call from Jeon Wonwoo

Wonwoo does not call. And when he does, he always texts you first and asks if you're available. He hates phone calls with his wholebeing, something that you religiously share, which means something's up and your heartbeat spikes at whatever that might've happened. for him to call you out of nowhere.

“Hello?” His answer doesn’t come immediately, so you try once again and it’s then that Wonwoo finally greets you back. “Is everything okay?’

”I… yeah.” He clears his throat. “Sorry for calling out of nowhere.”

You frown at his strange tone. You expect him to be a little frantic-surely something big happened for him to call you like this, right? But he doesn't really sound like he’s in any urgency to tell you what’s up; so you take the bait and ask him again.

”You sure?” 

Wonwoo sighs, and you sit up in concern because it’s not often that he’s this open with his struggle.

”Just… one of those days. Thought I’d call you.” He offers you honestly.

“Wanna talk about it?”

Wonwoo takes a moment and clears his throat, and you know immediately that his answer is no.

“When are you returning to Seoul, again?” You decide to steer the conversation elsewhere.

“In about a month. Why?”

“I might fly back.” You hum as you answer him. You try to extinguish the way your heart accelerates as his voice gets a little excited, try your best to ignore that excitement like you don't notice at all. “Thought I'd wait for you.”

You also try your best to sound nonchalant as you say that, but you're not sure if it's working. Either way, Wonwoo doesn't say anything about it.

“Oh? What's the occasion this time around?” 

“Some business trip. I might not have to crash your place.” 

He doesn't ask why you'd need to wait for him if you're not going stay over anyway. “And you can… arrange it as you want?”

“Somewhat.” You don't explain further. “I might need to drive down to Changwon too.”

“I'll see if I can come with you, then.” He answers readily. Your heart accelerates a bit more at the way he doesn't even wait a second to offer. 

The two of you share a comfortable silence for a bit, but Wonwoo can always tell when you have a lot in your mind, so he shoots right away.

“Anything on your mind?”

“Just…” You bite your lip in thinking, wonder if it's too early to let him know about it. Then decide it's not time just yet. “Nothing big. I'll let you know once things are clearer?”

“Okay.”

Your heart melts a little at his answer. It's why you like talking to Wonwoo despite his sometimes too realistic answer: he never pushes. He once tells you he trusts you'll tell him when you need to; that he doesn't need to coerce it out of you. 

Truthfully, you wish he would do it sometimes. But you also appreciate his trust in you and the way he listens to your words.

“I met Jisoo and the others today.” You mention just for the sake of distracting him. When Wonwoo is honest but he doesn't want to talk about it, you know what he needs is distraction. So it's really your cue to talk about anything that passes into your mind.

“Oh yeah? How's she?”

Wonwoo does not know your friends personally. But just like you talk about him to your friends, you talk about them to him. He's pretty attentive too, always remembers what you say about them even in passing. 

You wonder if he's this attentive to other people, too.

“Good. We went to this new izakaya near her place and their highball is to die for. You have to try the next time you're here.”

“You do like your highballs, don't you?” You can imagine the grin on his face even though you can't see him.

“You know I do.”

It's almost 2AM when you hang up, with Wonwoo falling asleep on the other side of the line. You spend about a minute staring at your walls, fifteen minutes pondering on the phone call you just had, and then another sixty trying to gather your feelings.

Fuck.

You really are in too deep with Jeon Wonwoo.

Wonwoo picks you up at the airport. He silently takes your luggage and guides you to his car parked not too far from the arrival building. 

There's no fanfare of confusing hugs nor hand holdings that's a little too tight. Wonwoo has never been big when it comes to physical touch to begin with; yet another point that's in contrast with you because you latch on anyone you're comfortable enough with within a meter radius. 

Wonwoo lets you rest your head on his shoulder though. And he'd sometimes take your hands when you're walking and the street is a little tad too busy, only letting go once it gets less crowded. The first time it happened, you almost threw your heart up.

“Where to, Miss?” He mocks being your chauffeur, to which you glare at and let him know the name of your hotel. “Oooh. Fancy.”

“Shut up and drive.”

Naturally, Wonwoo does as you say. It's your playlist playing in the background as a comfortable silence blankets the two of you. You haven't seen Wonwoo in six months, but it doesn't feel like that because you've been talking to each other a lot these days compared to before.

You're not sure what changed in that department, but Wonwoo has been rather active with his texts which confused you a little at first. You're not complaining though, even if it means Jisoo and the others are giving you shit for being on your phone more so than usual.

Still, it's a rather nice change instead of the other way around.

It's so easy being with Wonwoo. 

Everything seems to just work itself when you're with him. You don't really have to think much, even now after you realize and accept that you really do feel something more for him. You don't feel awkward when you see him, contrary to what you expected. 

During check in, you give the desk Wonwoo's car number when they ask if you need parking. You don't know why you assume he would have his car parked in your hotel at some point, but you try to convince yourself that it's simply a “just in case” scenario. 

You don't know why it's so natural for you to do that, either.

“We're meeting Soonyoung for dinner, right?” You ask as you wait for the elevator to come up to your room. Wonwoo leans on the wall, your small luggage still tight on his hand.

“Yeah. He's bringing you to his favorite place.”

“Have you been?”

“More times than I would've liked.” He grins. “It's pretty good. But Soonyoung always brings people there and I had the unfortunate luck to always be there when he introduces the place to someone.”

“Oh?” You tilt your head in confusion, the elevator dings just in time. Wonwoo steps out first and you follow into step beside him. “I didn't know you have a lot of mutual friends with him?”

Wonwoo doesn't go out a lot. He doesn't really like eating with people he doesn't know, so it surprises you a little that he's often there with Soonyoung when the guy is…introducing the place to someone else…?

A few seconds pass, and you wonder why Wonwoo seems to be contemplating his words. Does this mean…?

“Not that many, to be honest.” You notice he winces a little. The card beeps and you open your door, when Wonwoo goes past you as you hold the door open for him, you hold your breath at his proximity and the subtle scent of his perfume.

“But…?”

“Three times he brought me there to meet our mutual friends who don't live in Seoul, two other times just because, and…”

You settle on the edge of your bed as you look at him expectedly, your heart already beating loudly against your chest. You don't know why, but you feel like you already know the rest of the story and you don't like it.

Wonwoo sits right next to you on the bed, his thigh touches yours and his scent invades your being once again. He doesn't take your hand, but the way he's looking into your eyes and his knuckle hits the back of your hands tell you enough that he's nervous. Perhaps a tad bit guilty.

“One time he forced me to go on a double date because he really liked the girl and she wouldn't say yes unless he's bringing a friend for hers.” He explains. If he notices the way your breath stops for a bit, he doesn't say anything. “I told him I don't want to go, that I'm not interested. But he called in a favour I owe him a long time ago and… yeah.”

“Oh.”

It's the first time you ever share an awkward silence with the man beside you. You're not sure what to say despite already expecting the story to end this way–because what right do you have to be upset? Is there anything you could say that would make the situation not awkward?

Jisoo's question suddenly pops into your mind, something about exclusivity that's ambiguous and if Wonwoo's doing the same to you.

He mentions he doesn't want to go but…

“I imagine it was awkward?” You manage to say at last.

“Yeah. I barely talked and I told Soonyoung I'm never doing that ever again.”

“Did he end up with that girl?”

“For a few months.” He huffs, still annoyed now that he thinks about it. “All that effort and he only dated her for a few months.”

You let out a chuckle at this, notice the way Wonwoo relaxes a little at the sound of your small laugh. 

“Do you do that a lot?” You ask in what you hope to be subtle. While the topic comes up, might as well ask him about it. “Go on dates?”

His answer is an immediate “no”; like he has something to prove to you. 

“I don't go out with girls in general.” He says, this time looking elsewhere even though your eyes stay on his face. “I don't have a lot of female friends. The few that I actually consider friends… Well, we're not close enough to hang out privately.”

“Oh?” Your voice chokes a little, your feelings overtaking your head as you say your next words. “But you don't mind hanging out with me?”

“Mhm.” He hums, presses his lips together before he continues. “You're… you.”

He doesn't explain further and you're too afraid to ask. So you steer the topic by saying you're going to wash up a bit before you head for lunch, to which Wonwoo simply smiles and nods at. He moves to the small chair by the window and tells you to take your time.

“I don't mind waiting.” He says.

You wonder why you feel like his words mean more than they really do.

Fifteen minutes later, you find yourself in a restaurant nearby, seated next to Wonwoo because all the separate tables are full and only the bar ones are available.

The two of you don't address the unnecessary way you sit close next to each other. At some point, you're pretty sure Wonwoo rests his arm on the back of your chair, but you don't say anything just in case he'll pull it back.

You don't know how you feel about that realization.

Also, you don't realize how much you look like a couple until a waiter comes up to you both with a dessert you don't remember ordering.

“It's on the house.” He explains with a smile. “We're giving free desserts to couples during this month.”

The both of you spend exactly six seconds (you counted) staring at each other before you clear your throat and tell him to dig into the dessert before you eat it all.

“You can have it all.” He chuckles, knowing well enough how much you love desserts. “I'll buy you some more.”

Wonwoo's arm never leaves your chair until it's time for you to go, his finger brushes your shoulder every time you move.

You don't know how you feel about that either.

When it comes to meddling friends, you have exactly two (2) people in your circle: Kwon Soonyoung and Yoo Jimin.

You're glad the two doesn't know each other because you can already imagine the headache coming your way from their imaginary conspiracy. Handling one of them once at a time is enough headache for you already. 

Tonight, somehow they find a way to give you a giant headache at the same time even when they do not know of each other.

1 New Message(s) from Yoo Jimin🩷 on 🖤🩷🩵 & han🙂

Yoo Jimin🩷 : r u out on a date ????????

And then,

Kim Jisoo🩵 : ffs not this again🥱

Kim Jisoo🩵 : it is NOT a date unless he explicitly says it!!!!!!!!!!

Yoo Jimin🩷 : shut up lemme ship them in peace

Yoon Jeonghan💀 : lmaooooo 1000% agree w jisoo

Yoon Jeonghan💀 : put ur dream to rest, dude

Yoo Jimin🩷 : of all time for u to appear on the gc????????

Yoon Jeonghan💀 : i have rights to appear whenever i want???

🖤 : 🙂🙂🙂🙂

🖤 : im muting this group. byeeeee lol.

Kim Jisoo🩵 : this birhc???????

“Stop playing with your phone!!!” Soonyoung whines. He's been doing that since the three of you sit down, actually. “Now tell me. Any new guy.”

You don't know why he's so insistent on this topic. He knows about you and Wonwoo–or at least the lack of whatever you two have going on–so you're not sure why he keeps on asking about this except to piss you off.

“I told you there's no guy.” You cross your arms in annoyance. “Where are you getting ideas about this?”

The look in his eyes scares you a little. There are times when you do not want to cross Kwon Soonyoung and this is one of them.

“What about that guy in your group? Jeonghan, was it?” He presses on. “Isn't he handsome?”

“I don't see him as anything else but an annoyance personified.” You huff. “You know I haven't gone on dates since forever, why are you doing this?”

“Oh? Is that you asking me to introduce you to someone?”

Beside you, Wonwoo stiffens a little. 

“No! Are you drunk??” You know Soonyoung's baiting you, and despite this knowledge, his insistence is really starting to bait your annoyance.

“There's just no way you've gone on zero dates after you broke up with that asshole in uni.” This is news to Wonwoo. He knows you were in a relationship before (you weren't close at that point, but Soonyoung made sure to update him (re: whine to him) about you having a boyfriend that he didn't approve of. But he didn't know he was, well, an asshole. “It's been five years since you broke up with him!”

“Yes, thanks for highlighting how single I actually am.” You deadpan, throwing back a shot of soju. It’s not often that you drink soju, but on days like today when you haven't seen your close friends (Wonwoo and Soonyoung) in so long and Soonyoung is being persistently annoying, you need the help of alcohol to relax.

Soonyoung has the audacity to laugh, and then he follows your shot with his own before changing his target to the man beside you who's been silent the entire time.

“No worries. Wonwoo has been single for long, too.” He grins unapologetically. “I don't remember him going on dates at all. Except you haven't been telling me?!”

Wonwoo grunts softly, sipping on his soju instead. “Why would I tell you about my dates.”

Then, as if he realizes it's not the right thing to say, he adds, “But no. I haven't gone on dates in so long, either. Not everyone is like you, man.”

“I'll take that as a compliment.” He mocks a victory bow and then takes a piece of the free snack the restaurant offers on your table. He has had it refilled for three times already. “You're too busy. You don't even reply to my texts.”

At this, you reply instead of Wonwoo.

“Well, that's probably because it's you. He replies to my text just fine.” You stick your tongue out at him childishly, causing Wonwoo to chuckle next to you. 

Your head is starting to get a little heavy from the alcohol, so you lean on Wonwoo as you mumble about being a little sleepy.

“You want to go back?” He whispers like a secret, not minding Soonyoung pouting about being left out.

“Nah, I'm still fine.” You grin lazily despite the way your heart is beating too fast due to his proximity. You can even feel his breath against your cheek. “You'll know when I'm gone.”

The way he looks at you sternly makes you laugh, and you just know he'll scold you about drinking responsibly so you squeeze his arm and propose a toast between the three of you.

He reluctantly takes another sip of his drink while you and Soonyoung take another shot.

The night goes on like that, with Soonyoung trying to pick a fight with both of you and losing miserably three times out of five. Wonwoo's pretty sure the two of you have finished almost three bottles of soju while he barely drinks his third glass. 

When the two of you begin to giggle uncontrollably and you start hugging his arm for support, Wonwoo knows it's time to end the night. So he pays for the bill and calls a taxi for Soonyoung and for you two. He didn't take his car, knowing well enough that the night would force him to drink alcohol.

He's not complaining, though. It's been long since he has consumed any alcohol, and spending the night with the two of you is always fun despite the way Soonyoung insists on being a pain in the ass.

Wonwoo has his arm around your waist as he takes you up to your hotel room. You're not too drunk that you can't stand up, but you're drunk enough that you cling to Wonwoo the whole time.

He's in denial and blames the way his face turns hot and his reddening ear on the alcohol and not your body pressed close to his, your lips grazing his neck everytime you move. 

When he reaches your hotel room, he wonders how to go about this. Should he leave after you get to bed? Will you be okay in the morning? He can probably sleep sitting on the small sofa in the corner of your room if he wants. But is that appropriate?

Even in your drunken stupor, you hold all the answers for him.

“Stay with me.” You say like you know what he's thinking about. Your head is still heavy on his shoulder but he doesn't mind.

He slowly sits you down on the edge of your bed and kneels to take off your shoes despite your insistence that you can do it yourself.

“Can you wash up?”

“No.”

He chuckles at how adorable you are, then hopes your drunken mind wouldn't remember the way his palm caresses your cheek because he couldn't help it.

“You'll regret it in the morning though?”

“I just want to sleep.” You make your point and throw your body back to the bed. Wonwoo laughs once again, then checks your bathroom to see that you have indeed unpacked your toiletries. 

“I can help you remove your makeup.” He offers softly, knowing how much you hate washing up after drinking but you hate it even more when you wake up and realize you didn't. “Then I'll trust you to wash your face and brush your teeth?”

Your whine doesn't really mean anything, so Wonwoo does as he says and gently wipes your face with the makeup remover wipes you manage to fish from your pouch.

It’s the first time he ever does this, but he has listened to you complain enough about this over the years. His other hand is holding your face, and no matter how dense Wonwoo could be, he's not stupid enough not to know that he would never do this for anyone ever.

That this scene can be picked straight out of a romance movie and he wouldn't be surprised.

The way you trust him in your room in your drunken state, you asking him to stay, and him helping you clean up aren't something you do with just anyone.

He's also not stupid enough not to notice the warm feeling in his chest and the tingling all over his body. As much as he wants to deny what he feels for you all these time, this one moment is not something he could ever deny.

Dare he says he enjoys it and wishes he could do this with you often moving forward—taking care of you whenever he could.

He’s not going to lie and say he never considers being bolder with you; shows his interest and makes his feelings more obvious, but he doesn’t know if he could handle the aftermath. Do you return his feelings? Wonwoo can’t tell.

He knows enough that you haven’t been dating even before Soonyoung brings it up today. That you treat him as something more than friend because he’s seen how different you act with Soonyoung and (what you mention of) Jeonghan. 

But is it just you having a different dynamic with him?

Is it the years you have between the two of you even though you weren’t close before?

”Here, have some water.” He breaks his own thoughts and hands you a glass, hopes that it’ll make you feel better.

”Thank you.” You wince a little, followed by a small yawn. “I’ll just wash up real quick., okay?”

You don’t know Wonwoo will think about this domesticity for months to come.

Expectedly, you wake up to a headache.

Unexpectedly, you also wake up to a glass of water, an aspirin, and Wonwoo moving around in your hotel room.

”Wonwoo?’ Your raspy voice startles him a little, and you would’ve laughed if not for the headache steadily hammering against your skull. 

“You’re awake?” He says softly and moves to your side and helps you drink your water. “Bad hangover?”

Your grimace answers enough, and even though he laughs a little at your misery, you can tell that he’s a little worried. It’s not often that you get drunk in front of him.

”I don’t feel like throwing up, though.” You say after swallowing the aspirin then turn to him in horror. “Or did I already throw up last night?’

Wonwoo considers pulling your leg for a bit, but decides against it when he sees how horrified you look at the prospect of it.

”Nope, you didn’t.” He assures you. “Should we go out and eat once you’re feeling good enough? There’s a good gukbap place nearby that’ll help with your hangover.”

Fifteen minutes later, the two of you are seated in a corner in a busy restaurant, once again sitting side by side. It’s only ten in the morning, but, apparently, this place is famous for their hangover remedy and people often get breakfast because their gukbap is to die for.

You’re not even dressed properly, still in your pajamas with a hoodie thrown over your top. You really can’t be bothered in your and Wonwoo doesn’t seem like he minds either.

Leaning your head on Wonwoo’s shoulder yet again, you can’t help but feel like you’re taking advantage of the situation a little too much; that you’re milking the situation to your liking.

But you decide you don’t want to think much about it, that there’s nothing wrong with enjoying this moment as long as Wonwoo doesn’t say shit about it either. You feel his arm resting on the back of your chair; something the he does a lot, now that you think about it. Has he always done that before? Or is this a recent thing? You honestly can’t recall.

“Here’s your order.” The auntie manning the restaurant interrupts your thoughts, serving the godly scented gukbap in front of you and another for Wonwoo. “Here’s a jeon on the house because you two look pretty together. Enjoy.”

You blink at the recurring comment, then turn to Wonwoo with confusion. 

“Do people always offer free stuff for couples?” You frown, remembering the free dessert from yesterday. “What is this unfairness?’

Wonwoo laughs, tension leaving his body at your comments. He was concerned you were uncomfortable with the assumptions, but you seem to simply be annoyed at what it entails.

“You’re working at the Seoul office for the next four days, right?’

”Yepp. Important meetings and all that.” You say through your food. “I’ll let you know after.”

”Is it the one you told me about on the phone?”

”Yes.” You nod. “And then we leave for Changwon on… Thursday night?”

Wonwoo nods, and then cut some jeon for you to have on your small plate. 

“I already took the day off for Friday. You really don’t mind that we take the car? We can still book tickets for the train.”

”It’s been so long since I went on a road trip. Unless you don't feel like driving…?”

The sound of his chuckles brings tingles to your body, but you try to ignore it and hold your gaze on him. 

“I don't mind. I'm just worried you might be tired. It's almost a five hour drive, you know.”

You seem deep in thought, but the smile you send his way throws him off as you reassure him once again that you're fine. Though it's your next words that make his brain go a little awry for the rest of the day.

“It's also five hours with you. That's why I don't mind at all.”

Thursday evening comes and Wonwoo picks you up at the hotel. 

Soonyoung wants to come with, but his dog is sick and he has to take Latte to the vet. 

“Thanks for yesterday, by the way.” You scrunch your nose as you remember the night before. “Can't believe everyone brought their partner and didn't tell me.”

You had promised to see some of your old friends from school last night. Naturally, you expected it to be just the four of you. 

Naturally, there were three other guys on the everyone and you pulled an SOS to Wonwoo so you would't look pathetic, being the only girl on the table with no one. 

It had upset you a little, if you're being honest. It's been about three years since the four of you had hangout together, so you had been expecting to see them only.

Wonwoo seemed to immediately got your mood as he arrived, sitting right beside you (the only empty seat, of course, though there's nowhere else you'd rather he be) in midst of conversation.

It was fortunate that the restaurant isn't that far from his company, because he arrived about twenty minutes after you texted him: ten minutes to wrap up his work (he was already done for the day and had stayed around because a coworker seemed to be in a talking mood), and another ten to walk to the restaurant. 

He knew these friends, of course, having gone to the same school as you. But he didn't expect all of them to be in Seoul. Though, then again, it's not all that surprising that people would want to move to the capital city once they get older.

In the same sense, they also didn't expect you and Wonwoo to be close enough for him to attend this dinner for you.

“Oh, yeah. We only got closer a few years ago when he went to Japan for a trip.” You explain in what you hope to be a straightforward way that doesn't need further explanation. 

Your friend seems to buy this, and you're a little surprised that they don't bother about the nature of your relationship. Dinner was pleasant, you and Wonwoo found comfort in each other between familiar strangers (and actual strangers) and you had fun regardless the mishap at the beginning.

It wasn't until when you're parting ways that someone finally commented on it, and you couldn't even say anything because Hyeri sounded so sure and she didn't give you any way to rebutt.

“Didn't expect you two to end up together, but I should've known something would happen between the two of you. It was nice seeing you!!” She had said cheerfully before turning away and went on her way with her boyfriend.

After everybody left, you two looked at each other and blinked simultaneously, and then shared a laugh before Wonwoo insisted on taking you back to your hotel even though it's the farther away from his place.

None of you addressed the misunderstanding thrown your way.

“It was a good dinner though, right?” Wonwoo asks, as if the assumption Hyeri made and your nonexistent repulsion towards it didn't keep him up at night.

“Yeah, it was nice to see them after so long.” You settle on your seat after you finish pairing up your phone's audio to his car. “Anything you want to listen to?”

Wonwoo shakes his head and tells you to play whatever you want. About an hour later, his dad calls you and you accept the phone without turning off the bluetooth speaker.

“Hi, Uncle!!” You greet him happily. “You're calling me because Wonwoo isn't answering, aren't you?”

The laugh that greets you is both amused and unapologetic. But you're simply glad you're close enough with Wonwoo's family for this to happen.

“What’s up, Dad?”

“Just making sure you two are driving safely.” He answers. “I heard it's going to rain pretty heavily later, so you better stop and wait it out if that's the case.”

“Thank you for the heads up, Uncle! I'll make sure to remind Wonwoo later.

He reminds you two to take a break somewhere and to have sufficient meals that's not only composed of an ungodly amount of snacks. You share a guilty grin with each other, the pack of jelly on your hands suddenly feels a little heavy. 

You stop by one rest area to have some light meal (re: hotdog and tteokpokki) before going straight to Changwon. It's a karaoke session you're having in his car, in which you're the only one who mostly sings because Wonwoo doesn't really like to.

“You have a nice voice, why don't you sing more?” You press some time during the ride.

“Eh. Just don't really feel like doing it.”

“Hm. I like your voice, though.”

His hair covers the way the tip of his ears turn red at your confession.

You're a little hyper today, he notices. Perhaps you really are that excited over the prospect of going on a road trip even though it's dark outside and you can't really see anything on the highways. 

“You sure you didn't have any alcohol in your system?” He teases you, to which you simply hit his shoulder and continue on your little concert.

You're not the best singer, but you're not tone deaf and you carry your tune well enough, while Wonwoo's just happy to see you so cheerful.

You seem super relaxed too, and he wonders if your important meeting went well and if that's the reason why you seem like the weight is off your shoulders.

Not long after, the rain starts. And, surely enough, it gets harder and harder to the point where Wonwoo has to slow down just to make sure the car is going safe and sound. Fortunately, you two find a rest area soon enough and you decide to rest for a bit as you wait out the rain.

It doesn’t look like it’s going to stop anytime soon, though. So you ask if it’s okay for you to drink a can of beer that he can’t share because he’s driving. Wonwoo lets you, of course, you seem like you want to properly enjoy this ambiance and he doesn’t have any reason not to let you relax more.

Forty minutes pass just like that; with you facing each other in his car, soft music playing in the background as the rain steadily falls against the window. You talk about anything and everything, your can of beer turns into three, and even though it’s not enough to make you drunk, it’s definitely enough to make your lips a little looser as the topic shifts to relationships.

”Wonwoo?’” You ask timidly, though you know you can’t stop yourself now. The question has been bugging you since the moment you heard him say it. “Can I ask you something?”

”Of course.” He answers, a little confused.

”Why… me?”

For a second, you can see his startled face, but he schools it real quick that you wouldn’t have caught it if you aren’t already staring at him.

”What?”

”You told me before that you don’t like hanging around with your female friends.” You recall your conversation a few days ago. “But not me. Why?”

You let Wonwoo take his moment to gather his words, but as seconds pass by and the ringing of your heart is echoing against your ears, you start to think if it’s a bad idea to ask him this when you two have nowhere to escape.

“Nev—”

“Because you’re you.” He repeats his answers from that day. But this time, he moves forward with his explanation, the gentle look in his eyes makes your heartbeat stutter. “I don’t have any reason that I can offer. But you’re you and I like being with you.”

“Wha—?”

”I just like that it’s you.” He says with finality. Like it answers what you asked instead of blooming more questions.

This time, it’s Wonwoo that lets you take a moment to digest his words. It’s his turn to wonder if it’s not the time to be honest about his feelings. But if not now, he feels like he would take an even longer time to gather his courage yet again and spending time with you the past few days have made him sure about his feelings—that he can no longer deny them and he owes you that much if that’s what you’re asking no matter what the outcome would be.

He thinks back of the people that mistake you for being together; the way you don’t seem to mind and simply smile abashedly at them. The way you clung into him in your drunken stupor, how smitten he is that he actually stayed when you asked him to even though you probably don’t remember saying anything about it. The way your eyes twinkle with every single constellation he could think of. 

And most importantly, how much he feels complete in your presence. How content his heart is and how there’s nothing more he could wish for than to have you close.

He’d be downright stupid if he continues to deny his feelings for you at this point.

”Why now?” You ask quietly, and he can only be a little relieved that you don’t sound repulsive at his confession.

He’s not sure how to answer your question though. But if there’s one thing he knows, being honest is always the answer.

“I was afraid.” He pauses, pressing his lips together as he looks up at your eyes. “That I’m not good enough for you. That I can’t give you what you need with the distance between us and all.” 

“What changed?”

”I realized something.”

”And what is that?”

“That I’d rather try giving you what you need than not be able to try at all.” His voice is firm as he says this, and even though your question has been rather sudden, it feels like he’s always had the answer deep inside. “That I’ve always had you by my side without I even realize and I don’t want to take it for granted.”

”Do you remember Byul?” You ask out of nowhere, making a roller coaster out of his feelings.

”Your old dog?”

”Yep.” You smile sadly at the memory of her. Byul died when you were in junior high school. You cried for days and weren’t yourself for weeks. It was the first time you ever faced loss; the first time you ever felt like something important was taken from your life. “I was looking through my old pictures and found a bunch of her pictures. Do you know you have a picture with her?”

Wonwoo does not. You smile at his surprised face and show him the exact picture you were talking about. Wonwoo must have been ten at most, still wearing his uniform with Byu sleeping soundly on his lap. He’s also asleep in the picture, his fingers buried in her fur craved forever in that very picture.

”There was this time when she was a little depressed. She just kept on looking at the door even though everyone was home.” Wonwoo doesn’t see where this conversation is going, but he silently encourages you to continue and makes sure you know he’s listening. “We tried bringing her to the doctor, but it didn’t help. It’s only when you stopped by that we realized she was looking for you. You went on a vacation with your family for the whole summer, and when you came back she finally returned to her usual self and I remember feeling a little betrayed when she jumped happily for the first time the moment you came through the door.”

”I never knew…” He says quietly, suddenly memories of your dog popping into his head. He remembers being quite upset when he heard the news of Byul dying. She was his family’s dog too by extension, and it only made him sad now that he realized he only has one picture with her. “I did play with her a lot, didn’t I?”

”You did. You were around enough that my dog missed you when you’re not there.” You chuckle to yourself. “Do you remember taking me home everyday for a whole month after she died?’

You laugh at his surprised face. You did expect him to not remember this part, but you did—because it meant a lot to you that Wonwoo took the effort to care for you in his own way when you’re not even really friends.

”We used to go home together from time to time. But you waited for me in front of our school gate everyday for a whole month, only stopping once you realized I was feeling better. You’d give me ice cream and candies too.” Wonwoo notices the way your eyes water a little the more you talk about that time, but when he tries to ask you why you’re suddenly talking about this, you barrel through another topic. “There was also a time in high school when you helped me hide from my parents because I fought big time with my sister. That was the first time I ever had a screaming row with her, you know? I don’t even know why we were fighting. But I remember crying so much that you didn’t know what to do.”

This one Wonwoo remembers. He can still picture you crying in his room, his panicked eyes not sure what to do except to lie when your mom texted him to ask if he’d seen you. He had lamely offered you a box of tissues and stayed by your side without doing much.

”I appreciated it, you know? That you were there with me, not asking questions and not trying to comfort me.” You clear your throat and finally return his gaze. He can’t tell what you’re going to say next and his head is a little dizzy from the change of topic. Is this your way of turning him down? By talking about something else and pretending that nothing happened? “My point is… I tried thinking about a time when I don’t have you around and… I can’t.

We weren’t the bestest of friends and you weren’t my number one person, but you’re always there. When my dad asked you to teach me how to ride the bike instead of my older siblings, you did it without saying anything. When I failed calculus and my mom made you tutor me, you didn’t get frustrated even once when I took long to get it. When I broke up with my first boyfriend and I cried so much I didn’t realize it was already dark, it was you who found me in that park and brought me home. When I got the scholarship to Japan, you sent me off all the way to the airport even though my closest friends didn’t.”

Wonwoo seems a little flustered at your words, and you hold back the urge to tease him and finally, finally let your heart take the rein.

”You’ve always been there for me even before all of this. You’re the one person that I just know will continue to be in my life no matter what.” When your palm meets his cheek, Wonwoo melts a little at your gentle touch, your smile crumbling his being with little effort. “Can I trust you to do that?”

”Is that even a question?” He answers quietly, wonders if you can hear the loud beating of his heart in this proximity. “I used to have a small crush on you, you know?”

”What?”

”Yeah, during high school. I’ve always thought you were pretty, anyway. But you got a boyfriend and I realized it was nothing but a fleeting crush.” He grins at the way you’re continuously blinking at his revelation. “Never knew I’d end up liking you again years later, though. But you just have to live abroad and I’m not sure how it’ll work out even if you return my feelings. I’m a bad texter and even worse when it comes to calling. I can fix those habits, sure, but… I don’t think I can fix it in a short span of time, and I want to give you everything you deserve. So I never really try anything even though I abstained from going on dates and—”

”Wonwoo?”

”Yeah?”

”You talk too much.” You say before you close your lips over his, the way his arm immediately finds your waist and his other hand holds the back of your neck make your body comes alive; like a missing puzzle that you didn’t know was missing clicks into place and makes everything make sense. He pulls you closer, and even though it’s uncomfortable, you let him. 

Time works in a funny way when you’re with him, so even if you’re sure it’s only seconds that you spent kissing him, it surely feels like hours and more.

”I have to tell you something.” You whisper when you pull away, his warm breath hitting your face.

”Hm?”

”I’m moving to Seoul.” You announce in one go. “That’s what the important meeting is about. I asked if they had a vacant spot for a transfer to the main branch and they’re letting me transfer to Seoul.”

”For good?” He asks like he doesn’t believe it. Like it’s too good to be true.

Perhaps it is.

”For good.” You grin, your arms circle his neck despite the uncomfortable position you two are in. Your smile gets wider as Wonwoo kisses you again, and you laugh when you put one of your hands on his chest, his heart beating so quickly you’re worried it might jump out of his body. “Jisoo’s going to kill me when she finds out I’m moving in three months and I let you kiss me like this.”

”Oh?” He asks teasingly, one of his brows in question. “You let me kiss you?’

”I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You feign innocence. “Is there anyone here that can say otherwise?”

”Me?”

”Duh. You think Jisoo will believe you?” You roll your eyes jokingly. “They’ve been wanting to meet you, by the way. Jisoo and Jeonghan will grill you so bad.”

”You talk about your friends to me?”

”How can I not when you’re confusing me?”

”Was that how it felt?” He asks softly. “Like I was confusing you?”

You contemplate your next words, but then decide that there’s nothing to hide from what your friends said about him.

”They say you’re stringing me along. Because you’re obviously interested but not try to officially ask me out on a date.”

”You want to go on a date tomorrow?” He asks seriously, which turns your heart into mush because this man can’t get more precious than he already is. “I can think of a few places for us to go to.”

This isn’t where you expect the conversation to go, but you happily agree and ask him to surprise you. That you will contemplate on being his girlfriend if he does well.

”Oh? Aren’t you already my girlfriend the moment you kissed me?” He grins teasingly, a giddy filling bubbles up in his chest at the mention of you being his girlfriend.

”I’m not that easy.” You huff. “I’ll let you know tomorrow if you pass the test.”

Wonwoo laughs and pulls you into another kiss, his heart ballooning in size at the sound of your squeal followed by your giggle, your fingers gripping his shoulders.

He’ll go through a thousand tests if it’s for you, no question asked. 

a/n: i lov him so much.

©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved. I don’t allow any reposting, translation, and any other kind of redistribution of this fic. Please tell me if you’re aware of anyone doing this without my permission.

[sky-scribbles]

So there were some things I had to cut out of my book on aro & ace -ness for various reasons. Mostly, I had to trim it so it'd fit into a lower price range, but sometimes... I had to sigh heavily and admit that something was just too self-indulgent and it had to go.

These included:

A study of some historical figures whom I think might have been ace or aro (not to 'claim' anyone as aspec - we have no idea how people from the past might identify today - but I think it's important for us to remember that historical figures should not be considered straight by default, and that their lives shouldn't be painted as tragic if they didn't have a partner.)

In particular I got very annoyed with adaptations of certain historical figures' lives that write in romances that never existed, as if their lives are uninteresting unless you shove romantic love in there

A couple of thousand words yelling about how groundbreaking Critical Role's ace and aro characters are (this one PAINED me to remove)

A rambling diversion into animals that breed cooperatively and how they disprove the dumbass narrative that 'the sex drive trumps everything so being ace is obviously ~unnatural~'

A bunch of other stuff where I had to look myself in the eye and say 'Sky. I know this is fun. But is this relevant. Is this necessary.' Alas it was not.

Anyway it makes me very sad that I couldn't include this stuff, and the upshot is: I'm starting a free Medium blog (EDIT: formerly on substack but moved for Reasons) so I have a place where I can yell about everything I couldn't fit in the book. I'll probably use it to yell about general aspec & pop culture things in general!

I'd love to to have you if you're interested in my aspec gushings <3

(Book available for pre-order here & here)

[x-reader-theater]

Secret Messages from a Lover

summary: While you're streaming, your boyfriend sends you a message.

pairing: Corpse Husband x Gender Neutral Reader (no pronouns are used.)

word count: 670

warnings: none.

a/n: i really just needed to write something so self-indulgent because god i want this so bad. i figured others want it too. i've been so depressed lately that I just need a little fantasy, you know? my requests are open, and you can find my request rules here.

“God, that video is so fucking funny,” you say, pulling your blanket around your shoulders tighter with one hand while the other brings your patterned tumbler with the sparkly straw up to your mouth, so you can drink your water. Your knees pull further up to your chest, which is easily done in your very spacious gaming chair. “OTV never fucking misses.”

You press a button on your stream deck, switching from the video you were just watching to your face, with chat scrolling in the top left-hand corner. You take another sip from your tumbler and pick out one of the comments passing by, scrolling to stop it from moving as you read it aloud.

“Were you on the newest Fear& episode? I was. QT, Hasan, Will, and I just kinda chatted for a bit. That was a good fucking episode, though,” you say with a grin. “Love those guys. QT especially, she’s fucking hilarious. She makes me laugh so fucking hard whenever I talk to her, even if we disagree on Taylor Swift.”

You keep scrolling back down, so you can keep seeing the comments when another one jumps out at you. “Are you gonna keep streaming? Yeah, chatter, I actually just started before that OTV video. I think Toast is gonna invite me to some Pico Park today? If not, I’ll just play some Valorant or something to pass the time. I gotta git good if I wanna beat, well, anyone,” you admit with a laugh, hiding your shame by taking another drink of water.

You see your phone light up in front of you. It’s a Discord notification, which you quickly check on your second monitor, assuming it’s Toast inviting you to the Discord call.

It’s not. It’s your boyfriend, Corpse.

“You look so cute today babe. You look so cosy wrapped up in your blanket and your smile is so bright. I'll never get tired of seeing it. I love you and have a good stream 🖤”

You feel your cheeks heat up at that, and you take a sip of your water to try and hide your reaction. You haven’t told anyone you're dating Corpse yet, and you have no plans on it any time soon, but he makes you so happy you find it hard not to blurt it out whenever you can.

You send back a bunch of yellow hearts and an “I love you too!!!!!!! 💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛”, biting your lip as you type on your very satisfying, clack-y keyboard.

That’s when you get the notification from Toast to join the shared call.

“Ah! Toast’s calling!” you exclaim for the benefit of your audience.

You quickly join the call, the connection sound filling you comfortable, over the ear headphones.

“Hey! What’s up!” you say into the call, getting a couple of “Hey!”’s and “Hello!”’s back.

Then you hear a familiar voice say, “What’s up.”

“Corpse!” You’re grinning at this point as you continue, “I didn't know you were gonna be playing!”

“Uh, yeah. Toast invited me last minute. Surprise?” he says like it’s a bad thing.

“We haven’t played anything together in a while and I saw him online and thought, ‘Fuck it,’ yaknow?” Toast asks and you chuckle.

“Well, it’s good to talk to you again, Corpse,” you say, setting your tumbler down on your desk. He got you that tumbler for your birthday not long ago, and it’s your favourite thing you own. He also got you the blanket that’s wrapped around your shoulders for your six-month anniversary, and it’s the warmest blanket in your house. You always wear it when you stream because the A/C is always blasting.

“It’s good to talk to you too,” you say, shivering as your heart hammers at his words.

You begin loading up Pico Park, just listening to everyone talk to each other, when you get another notification on Discord.

“I love you 🖤” it says.

“I love you too 💛” you reply, smiling into the camera for just a moment, just for him.

[russellsppttemplates]

i love how you write all your readers being employed misses! maybe Franco surprising his girlfriend at work when he knows she's really overwhelmed with a lot of work

Note: this is very self indulgent after the week I just had

"I'll see you tonight, handsome - I'm not sure when I'll get back, but hopefully in time for us to make something for dinner" was the last thing Franco heard from you when he got back from his workout, seeing you put on your work backpack, carrying another big file and a totebag full of toys and activities.

The routine was back and this was one of the busiest times of the year for you, so while he understood the demands of your job, he also knew how quickly it could get too much and how it took you even longer to admit that you were overwhelmed.

Getting ready to go out, your boyfriend showered and left the apartment, a to-do list in his notes app that he wanted to complete before lunch time. The market was open today, so he stopped at the different spots he needed to get everything he wanted, packing them into his car and driving to your workplace.

You were updating the patient files, detailing what happened in the sessions when you noticed your lunchtime approaching, hastening your writing as you were hoping yo have the full break before going back for a full afternoon.

"Hello, good morning!", you recognised the all too familiar accent down the hall, "Is Y/N still in her office?".

As you heard the receptionist say yes, you walked to meet them at the front, shaking your head in disbelief as you watched your boyfriend stand there, big smile on his face as soon as he spotted you, "Hi, mi amor".

"Hello, Fran", you smiled back, "what brings you here? We're closed for new bookings, I'm afraid".

"It's a good thing then, because I came here to whisk you away for lunch - at what time do you have your next appointment?", he asked.

Before you could answer, the repeceptionist was quick to speak, "three o'clock!", getting a playful side eye from you, "Y/N, it's called a lunch break because you shouldn't do any work during that time! Go and enjoy it, please!".

Accepting it and realising you needed a break, you went back to your office to make sure everything was tidy and organised before being escorted out, bidding the receptionist goodbye as she, too, was going home for her break.

"Thank you for taking me out of there", you began as you let Franco guide you along the sidewalk, "it was getting a bit too much and I could feel myself start to flip out".

"I noticed these past couple of days you have come home very tired, and you're trying to put on a big, brave face and you don't need to. In there", he pointed in the direction of your workplace, "I get it that you have to seem fine but at home, with me, you can be vulnerable and feel everything else, okay?", he offered.

The love you felt for him grew even bigger in that moment as you stopped for a moment, kissing his lips and hugging his waist so you could continue on your way, "thank you, I love you so much", you mumbled.

"We're getting the food from the car, because there is a very nice park around here and I want us to enjoy your break outside with fresh food!", he smiled, taking out a bag and lacing your hand back in his.

You found a table that was vacant and spread out all of the fresh food Franco brought, "the lady at the market said it was fresh baked this morning, and I know you love bread and olives", he said non chalantly as you exaggerated a moan at how good the food was.

Franco sat next to you and you quickly cuddled up to him, enjoying the feeling of comfort he was providing you. This was your space to be yourself, insecurities, vulnerabilities and all.

"This was a good idea, no?", Franco asked, pecking the side of your head.

"Yes, thank you so much, love", you smiled, snuggling closer to him, "I needed to get away from that desk".

"You can always count on me to do that, amor, always", he squeezed you against his body.

(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)

[brainrot-the-frog]

How (some of) the Jinzhou girls listen to you ramble

A/N: note that I only wrote about the girls that I actually know about-sorry in advance if I forgot your wife, there's a lot of them. Wrote this with gatorade and a dream (anyways what if I became a Wuwa writer lol)

WARNINGS: not proof read

CHARACTERS: Yangyang, Chixia, Baizhi, Jianxin, Jinhsi, Sanhua, Changli, Yinlin

『 YANGYANG 』 Yangyang is very attentive, almost to an unnerving degree. She isn't weirded out by eye contact so if you don't like it she will not pick up on it and just stares a hole through your head. Yangyang holds within herself a constant desire to be there for others, the comfort she gives and the attention you receive from her is a testament to that. She hums along to what you say before adding her own piece.

She's a rambler too though so buckle up and listen too!

"Your story about about that Impermanence Heron reminds me of a past story told to me by the Streams, see, even they are listening."

『 CHIXIA 』 Chixia is bustling with energy so you'll have to walk with her, arms linked together as you recount your latest interest, topic, what have you. She lets out the occasional, "uh huh!" "Wait who?" as she takes you around Jinzhou's markets, it's a win-win in Chixia's eyes, she gets to spend time with you and patrol her beloved city. It couldn't be more perfect.

"Let's go get something to eat and you can tell me about that book you're real into!"

『 BAIZHI 』 Good luck finding Baizhi outside of the academy, out of her office. Inside you sit near her desk as she works. Don't get the wrong idea, she's listening even if it seems like she isn't. Typing away as screens of wavelengths decorate the space in front of her. When you first stop speaking she halts the movement of her fingers on her laptop, she says nothing, she doesn't need to as you pick up where you left off. She resumes her typing. If you stop a second time, Baizhi only spares a side glance to you.

She isn't the expressive type, but never doubt that she is listening to you.

"And? What did you do after that?"

『 JIANXIN 』 Catching the sight of raindrops in the morning light, you sit with Jianxin on a bench overlooking Jinzhou's bridge, avoiding the rain under the shelter you two reside. You're talking to her about your latest interest, not knowing that the monk wishes for the rain to continue just a bit longer so she can hear your voice a bit longer. This is a selfish want, a desire she knows she should clear from her mind to maintain the clarity of her self.

Maybe just this once, she'll indulge, nodding at your words with a smile on her face.

"If I find anything during my travels that pertains to your interest, I'll be sure to get it for you!"

『 JINHSI 』 She somehow finds the time to let her focus stray from being the Magistrate, if only for a moment, to listen to you speak. You're ranting to her, this much she is certain. She doesn't interrupt, nodding along at your words. There remains that tinge of professionalism she always houses in her posture. But her eyes are warm. She needed this more than she will ever tell you.

She allows herself to lean forward, just a little bit, so you know that her time, both precious and seldom, is yours.

If only for just this moment.

"If we ever catch the time, I'd like to invite you out to the Jinzhou Theatre, it never fails to brighten my day. I hope it can brighten yours."

『 SANHUA 』 Sanhua doesn't know how she got herself in this predicament. She was ordered to tail you, to ensure your safety as you traverse the plains of Huanglong, a Tacet Discord was about to strike you from behind until Sanhua stepped in. Now? She's walking with you side to side as you recount to her your day and all the things that have caught your attention. She doesn't know what to do in this situation other than listen. She's stone faced, but really it's to hide her initial shame at having been caught.

She has to admit, the conversation is pleasant.

"Apologies, I promise I'm paying attention.. I'm just.. getting used to your silhouette."

『 CHANGLI 』 Changli's stare makes you feel as though you can't not speak to her about your latest findings. Rambling to Changli feels as though she's committing you to memory, documenting your gesticulations and the intake of breaths between subjects. She hums along to what you say as her forefinger traces the rim of her cup. The Weiqi board between the two of you momentarily forgotten. It's fine, Weiqi isn't the only way she can best understand you, no,

sometimes it's just listening. Watching.

"How did I know you were going to mention that story you like so much? Well, you just answered your own question did you not?"

『 YINLIN 』 Yinlin pushes down the glasses she was wearing and pins her eyes to yours, whether it makes you nervous or not, she will know. Zapstring sits on your lap as Yinlin flips to a new page on her book on Qipao, you have half the mind to think that she's taking notes on you. That, you won't get to know. She leans in as you speak, and you feel like you have to tell her everything.

You do.

"My, you lead an exciting life, don't you?"

[evenyvn]

Cherry Chapstick

Xilonen x Fem!reader

Summary : you help xilonen applying chapstick after noticing her dry lips.

Cw : sapphic coded reader and xilonen, 2nd person POV, sfw, fluff, established relationship, OOC xilonen, reader calls xilonen "darling", very short and self-indulgent.

i recently just got back playing genshin again after rage quiting because i didn't get xilonen on her release (fck you hoyo). meet xilonen in game and this is how i cope💔

masterlist

As you lean closer to the woman, one of your hands reach closer to her face, your thumb gently brushing over her lower lips, as the rest of your fingers rest on her jawline.

"Your lips have been really chapped lately, have you drink enough water darling?" You furrowed your brow as xilonen sighed, leaning closer to your touch.

"I have, i just drank-" "i mean real water xilonen, not the flavoured ones." You said pointedly making her shut her mouth immediately before huffing.

"You know i don't like those flavour-less water, it doesn't taste good! besides what's wrong with juices? they're healthy too you know"

A slight pout on grew on her lips as you brush your thumbs gently over the plush but slightly chappy lips, a rare sight of the normally fierce woman pouting, a sight only you have the privilege to witness.

A fond smile appears on your lips as you pull your hand away to reach your pocket, not missing the way xilonen leans slightly into you as if chasing your touch. Your hand retrieve a tub of chapstick, A cherry flavoured chapstick exactly.

Your smile deepens as you twist open the cap of the cherry-flavored chapstick, rolling it up just enough to coat her lips. Xilonen watches you with a mix of curiosity and anticipation, her pout still lingering as she stubbornly refuses to admit she needs it.

You lift the chapstick toward her lips, pausing just before they touch. "Stay still," you murmur, voice softer than before.

Xilonen huffs lightly but obeys, parting her lips just enough for you to smooth the balm over them. Your free hand comes up, gently cupping her chin to keep her steady. The moment the cool balm glides over her lips, she exhales softly, eyes fluttering shut as if savoring the sensation.

You take your time, carefully coating every dry patc, your thumb instinctively brushing over her jaw in slow, soothing strokes. When you're satisfied, you pull back slightly, admiring the subtle red sheen left behind.

"There," you say, voice tinged with amusement. "Much better."

Xilonen licks her lips experimentally, pausing for a moment before wrinkling her nose. "Cherry?" she mumbles, cracking one eye open to glare at you.

You chuckle, tucking the chapstick back into your pocket. "I thought you liked cherry."

"I do," she admits, but there's a slight blush dusting her cheeks now. "You just—" She stops herself, shaking her head before looking away. "Never mind."

You tilt your head, intrigued. "What?"

She hesitates before finally mumbling, "You could’ve just handed it to me… but you did it yourself."

Your smile softens, and you lean in just a little, lowering your voice. "Would you have done it properly?"

Xilonen stays quiet, her lips pressing together, now soft and glossy from the balm you applied. You chuckle again, pleased with her silence.

"Thought so," you say, reaching up to tap her nose gently before pulling away.

i love the way xilonen can't drink regular water because it doesn't have any taste (same xilonen, same, but I'll actually die if i didn't drink real water).

divider by @.adornedwithlight | likes, reblogs, and comments are very appreciated ♡

[scarletwinterxx]

i might just love you 'til the end - joshua hong imagine

i admit this is very self indulgent, it's my bday and i wanted to write this so here we are🥺🥺😅

for my other svt fics, check them here

if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(pics not mine, credits to rightful owner)

A cold bed is not something you expected you'd wake up to on the morning of your birthday. Usually you'd wake up with your boyfriend's arms wrapped around you like your own personal weighted blanket but that wasn't the case today thus prompting you to get up and go look around the house for the said missing boyfriend.

Thinking he might've went to the gym so you didn't expect to see him until later but then you hear some noises coming from the kitchen and some music playing.

Making your way downstairs and to the kitchen, you see Joshua standing with his back to you while holding a spatula in one hand. Too lost in his own world, humming along the tune of Sunday Morning playing in the background.

You smile as you walk towards him, catching him off guard when he suddenly feel a pair of arms hug him from behind.

"Hey, you. You're up early" he says, looking around to catch a glimpse of you

You cuddle against his back, seeking the warmth you missed this morning. He lets you be, knowing how clingy you get when you're sleepy. He doesn't mind it one bit when you sleep on him or fall alseep when you're with him. To him it's an honor, knowing you feel safe around him to fall asleep quickly after you told him you used to struggle with that before meeting him.

Feeling content with the quiet surrounding, he gently sways back and forth as he finishes the stack of pancakes with you still clinging to him.

"You weren't there so I woke up" you mumbled after a while, earning a chuckle from him

"Sorry, I wanted to make us breakfast. I was going to take it up to you but since you're already here, let me set up the table after I finish with the pancakes"

"I'll do it, you finish here" you tell him, giving him a final squeeze before separating from him. Before you can walk away, he grabs you by the arm making you crash back into his awaiting arms

He looks down at you with a smile, eyes locking with your eyes "Happy birthday, my darling"

You grin at him, standing on your tiptoes to kiss him on the lips "Thank you, baby"

"Oh and I got you flowers, that's not my main gift I'll give that later but I hope you like them" he says as he grab the bouquet from the table to pass it to you

"Josh, these are so pretty" you coo at him, "Thank, baby. Really. You don't have to get me anything but I appreciate all the effort, you really do know how to make this day extra special"

"How can I not when my most favorite person is born today. I'm just so happy to be celebrating this day with you"

You put the flowers down to give him another hug, Joshua does the same. Wrapping his arms around you, lifting you off the ground. He can hear your giggles, the sound making all the butterflies erupt in his stomach. He really truly is deeply in love with you.

"You're my favorite person too. I'm so thankful for you" you tell him

He gives your cheeks and your nose kisses before kissing you on the lips, smiling as he takes your breath away like he always does whenever he kisses you.

"Tell me what you want, name it. Anything"

"Really? Anything?"

"Mhm, what do you have in mind?" he asks, noticing the cheeky look in your eyes

"If I say I want to celebrate all of my birthdays like this, us in our kitchen cooking breakfast"

He looks at you, your future together already unfolding in his mind. Of course there's no one else he can imagine spending the rest of his life with but you.

He leans down, capturing your lips once again before answering you

"Consider it done, I'm yours forever my darling"

You smile hearing him say the word forever. For him, you'd believe it actually exists. You'd use all your birthday wishes just to make sure you're going to stay right where you are right now.

"Get ready for a whole day of romantic gestures and all out cheesiness because I'm only getting started" he jokes, putting you down before getting back to cooking

"Wouldn't celebrate this day any other way"

[bloodstainedsapphic]

Mattheo Riddle - Gamer BF Headcanons

minors dni | smut implied at the end | F! reader implied modern au | this is so self-indulgent im sorry

-Mattheo gets very into online gaming with his friends, often being the loud and rowdy one who cracks dirty jokes on voice chat. -he isn't very good at multiplayer, though, but will never admit it. 'Definitely a glitch. those kills are way off. No way Enzo got more than me; he didn't do shit! This game has it out for me, I swear.' -he enjoys single-player games as well as a pastime. -loves horror games, zombie horror, to be precise (self-indulgent HC: he's a resident evil fan). -In a relationship, Mattheo encourages you to play games. He is your biggest cheerleader when he watches you play. 'You've got this, darling.' -He would be willing to play a cozy game with you, but somehow, it always devolves into chaos. You will probably quit inviting him for the sake of your Stardew Valley saves. -He often takes over when you game together, but more because he just likes to play for the two of you and not because he thinks you're bad! -Mattheo used to have a worse temper during gaming, but one stern look from you, the one and only time you witnessed him throw his controller, was enough to make him never do it again. -His happiest moments involve taking control when a horror game gets too spooky for you, allowing you to rest on him while he takes charge—a win-win situation. 'Don't worry, love. I'll protect you, just relax.' -He adores it when you nestle in and nap between his legs while he games. His tender side really comes out then, playing with your hair and whispering sweet nothings in your ear between games and loading screens. -Thoroughly enjoys your attempts to trash-talk him, which usually turns into cheeky flirtations and most likely a quickie. -Mattheo is very fun to tease while gaming. Put your hands on him, and he'll have to insist to his friends that he was moaning over Theo's voice and not your hand on his- -Will not hesitate to mute his mic and fuck your face while he stays online. His large hand grips your hair into a ponytail as he roughly pumps your mouth with his cock, grunting and panting. 'fucking take my cock, you little slut; this is what you fucking asked for by playing with daddy like that.' -And if he doesn't take that route, be warned that if you tease him while he's playing, you better count on not being able to walk the next day.

[choccorin]

light rain | ft. sakura

tags. fluff , sakura haruka x gn! reader, maybe ooc 'kura?

at the early stages of your relationship, sakura never knew that you get sick very easily and he found this out when you were going on a light stroll.

sakura was on break from patrolling when he saw you shopping for some things at a store, since he was on break, he offered to walk you home and you happily accepted.

while he was walking you from, it started to rain a little bit. you knew that you'd get sick even at the tiniest bit of rain, so you told him to hurry up.

once you arrive to your apartment, you were both a bit wet from the rain. so before he left, you offer him your umbrella. he declined at first saying he doesn't need it but you insisted, you explained that you didn't want your boyfriend to be sick. he turns red at the nickname, he accepts your umbrella with a blushing face.

it was now the next day, sakura thought it was weird that you didn't go to school today, you didn't even tell him why. he got a little sad that you didn't tell him but he's never admit that. he's getting worried so he decided to call you.

his phone rings and you immediately pick up.

“hey, you okay?” he says on the phone, he was expecting you to respond but got confused when he heard coughing and sniffling instead,

“are you sick?!” he yells with a worried tone, surprising his friends beside him.

you sniffle, “yeah .. the light rain caught to me yesterday ...” you chuckle, cringing at the sound of your hoarse voice.

“okay, i'll be right there.” sakura replied, suddenly ending the call.

“huh- what?” you were left shocked, looking at your phone. did you hear him correctly? he's coming over to your place?!

sakura rushed out pothos café, explaining to his friends — just as shocked as you were — that he had something to do before running out.

in just 5 minutes, your door bell rang. you hurriedly open the door to find sakura in front of your door, panting while holding a small bag.

“you actually cough came .. ” you were also out of breath, you sheepishly smile at him.

“wha- what are you doing out of bed, dumbass!?” he pulls in you to your apartment, closing the door behind him. his grip on your wrist is firm — but gentle.

he sits you on your bed, “stay here. i-i'll take care of you, okay?” his hands on your shoulders were trembly and he looks nervous, this is his first time taking care of someone and being inside your apartment, of course he was nervous.

he walks out your room and you here some clattering in your kitchen, you wanted to get up but you don't want to disobey your already stressed boyfriend.

you didn't want him to see you all vulnerable like this but you were glad that he came just to take care of you, seeing him all worried about you made your heart melt and also made you feel a bit better.

sakura comes back with a bowl of soup, water and some medicines. he tells you to eat, explaining that kotoha gave it to him before he ran out of the café.

“give kotoha my thanks then. ” your voice sounds weak and softer than usual.

sakura doesn't like seeing you being weak like this, it makes him want to protect you like your some kind of hurt cat.

sakura meant it when he said he'll take care of you since he went home at 6 am, never leaving your side. it was the next day and still early but he had classes and patrolling so you offered him to go now, after a lot of reassuring him that you're better now, he leaves.

sakura never carries any umbrellas with him, his body is used to getting drenched in rain anyways. but this changed when he saw how sick you were that day, so now, he always carries an umbrella so that in case you forget yours — which you often do — and it looks like it's going to rain, he'll give it to you.

he might not say that he loves you by his words, but his actions say otherwise.

n. this is self indulgent. i get sick very easily so i thought about sakura being worried about his sickly lover <3

t. @kyoghurts hi :3

[leashybebes]

fic: blue and gold (25/28)

today's @bucktommyfluffebruary prompt is sharing a blanket and my fill is here and below

Most of Tommy's stuff is in storage while they wait to complete on the house and he's putting it down to the loft's high ceilings, and the unseasonable weather, but he is miserably, deeply, unhappily cold. So he steals one of Evan's warmest hoodies from the closet, drags the comforter off the bed, along with the brightly colored crocheted blanket that mom sent them home with from Taos and makes himself a little self-pity nest on the couch. God he cannot wait to get rid of this damn couch. If he had his way he'd burn it. Right now, even. He might finally get warm.

Evan arrives home half an hour into Tommy sulk, walking through the door with a bright smile and a cheery greeting that dies on his lips when he sees Tommy.

"Are you coming down with something?" he asks, pressing the back of his hand to Tommy's forehead like he's five years old.

"You should take temperature on the chest," Tommy corrects. "But if you try to move this blanket I'll bite you."

"Promises, promises."

Tommy rolls his eyes. "I'm not getting ill. It's just cold."

"It's LA, Tommy, it's literally never cold."

"Spoken like a true non-California native," Tommy grouses, tucking his chin back under the blanket.

"Whatever you say, dear," Evan teases, dropping a kiss onto the top of Tommy's head.

Thank god, Tommy's inherent bitchiness just kind of rolls off Evan these days. He even seems to find it kind of endearing, which - Tommy can't say he gets it, but he's grateful for it. Especially today because despite what Evan thinks, it is cold, and Tommy is not at his best when he's cold. Huffing a little, he wraps the blanket more tightly around himself, half-listening to the sound of Evan moving around in the kitchen.

When Evan returns a few minutes later it's with a bottle of water in one hand and - and a steaming mug of tea in the other.

"Thank you," he says.

Evan gives him a look. "Don't hurt yourself."

Tommy can admit that even for him, the tone was prickly.

"Sorry. I appreciate it."

"Appreciate it enough to let me under the blanket?"

Tommy looks at him suspiciously. "You're not cold."

"Correct," Evan agrees. "You gonna pass up the opportunity to leach some body heat?"

That's…fair. Tommy unrolls a single flap of his blanket burrito and holds it out for Evan. Evan has a little smirk on his face like he thinks Tommy is ridiculous but is very happy to indulge him. It's enough of a turnaround from their usual dynamic that it shakes Tommy out of his mood and he looks at Evan sheepishly.

"Sorry. I hate being cold."

"I'll remember that when I take you to Iceland."

Tommy's softens. He wasn't expecting Evan to have remembered that.

Evan rolls his eyes fondly and pulls Tommy into a one-armed hug, careful not to jostle his tea.

"Love you, frosty."

Tommy hides his smile in Evan's shoulder.