#so think of this as more of a hypothetical 'final form' if the vixens got their way

[omegalomania]

they say not to summon that which you cannot put down

[bave-de-crapaud]

The Chaperone...

PART ONE

Artwork by flowsofly

Post Azkaban Sirius Black x Reader Older Sirius Word Count: 1600+

Warning: Eventual Smut

Disclaimer: all characters are assumed 18+

—————

“Sirius, you know I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because you are trying to get intel from this woman! For the Order no less.”

Sirius sighed and dropped his face onto his kitchen table. Y/N barely had time to move his coffee mug out of the way before he knocked it over.

“I know, but every time I talk to her she thinks I’m making a move or asking her out.”

Y/N raised her eyebrows in half amusement. “Well, you do flirt, a lot.”

Sirius cocked his head at her and smirked. “That’s just with you, sweetheart.” To Sirius’ annoyance though, Y/N rebuffed this comment.

“Well, have you tried being clearer and stating you are not interested?”

He sat up and looked at Y/N - his derisive expression told her the answer he didn’t need to voice.

“Well, what about appealing to Dumbledore? Surely he won’t keep you in this position…” she trailed off as Sirius scoffed, looking away from Y/N.

“He thinks this is an advantage. Even Moody told me to use ‘every angle.’”

Sirius’s frown concerned Y/N. She’d known him for a few years now - heard of him for longer. He wasn’t the sybarite person that everyone thought he was and she understood his dilemma of having to ‘suck it up’ for the greater good - ending the Death Eater reign.

However, unlike Dumbledore and Moody, Y/N thought that after his stint in Azkaban, and consequent years on the run followed by an enforced house arrest, Sirius had sucked it up enough for their cause.

“Ok, say I do stay and run interference for this…” Y/N waved her hands in the air, struggling for a word to describe the situation.”This… meet.”

“Yes?!” Sirius’ face broke into a hopeful grin which caused Y/N to hold out her palm and halt the hope before it spread.

“Hypothetically speaking, Sirius…. How will that help? Haven’t you already tried this with Remus and Bill?”

Y/N didn’t like the crooked grin that played on Sirius’ face just then, it foretold of danger for her and when he answered she saw where his game was.

“Yes…” Sirius drawled slowly. “But not as my, girlfriend.”

“Oh no! Don’t go there.” Despite her initial reaction of shock, Y/N couldn’t help smiling at his cheeky smirk.

Sirius, pursed his lips and studied her, tapping his boot on the table leg next to him. They sat in silence for a moment, each debating the pros and cons of his request, deflating each second as the realisation grew that though Y/N staying would help Sirius in his conundrum, it would certainly derail his assignment and cause him to lose a key contact.

The thing about Rita was, she didn’t, and had never taken ‘No’ for an answer. It was what made her such an excellent reporter and such an insufferable witch…

-

“Oh Sirius, you are just sooo funny!” Rita’s sickly sweet voice rang out through the room as she placed her hand on his chest and leant into him as if to prove to her colleagues he was her conquest.

Sirius, leant away and smiled mechanically. “All I said was ‘I’m tight on time.’” He knew she was trying to get everyone’s attention. He had been half sure that her intention of inviting him to her workplace for ‘urgent intel’, was in fact a ruse to show him off to her workmates. Now he was certain.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” Sirius crossed his arms over his chest, thereby subtly removing her hand from his body.

“Why don’t we talk about this over dinner tonight?” She purred, circling her index finger along his forearm.

The feeling made Sirius’ shiver in disgust and he was certain his balls had just tried to insert themselves back inside his body.

“You called me here to tell me to come to dinner? Jesus, I left work for this - I thought you had some important info?”

Not in the least perturbed, Rita smiled her devious smile at him.

“Oh the Auror office won’t miss you for 5 minutes with me will they?” She attempted to batt her eyes at him in a sycophantic sort of way.

Sirius couldn’t help it, his mouth turned down in disgust and she had noticed. He was weighing up his options: piss her off and lose potential info or acquiesce, and suffer through another obsequious evening. It was perhaps the hardening in her eyes at his obvious distaste to her flirting and the worry of failing the Order that answered for him.

“Fine. See you tonight. Come to my place. 6pm. We’ll eat.”

Rita smiled triumphantly as Sirius turned, leaving the room quickly.

“Oh, I have a friend staying with me at the moment and she’ll be joining us. You’ll like her. See you tonight.”

Though his back was turned, he could picture the shocked displeasured look finding its way onto her features. It was small wins like this that gave him strength, and he smirked to himself as he strode out of the room.

-

“Yikes - she is awful, Sirius.” Y/N had listened as he talked and started to feel sorry for the man. He was, as he had so eloquently pointed out previously, between a rock and a hard place. Could it possibly be that they - the Order - his friends had misjudged this supposed playboy?

As Y/N contemplated this, Sirius sighed and took another sip of his coffee. Y/N studied his face, it was drawn and resigned. Not at all like the playful, gregarious Sirius she was used to.

Wanting to cheer him up, Y/N kept searching in her brain for help, “well, it won’t be all bad will it? You’ll at least have someone with you tonight.”

Sirius looked back at Y/N, a hopeful expression filling out his face. “I will?”

“Yes.” Y/N frowned confused. “You said to Rita that someone was…oh no!”

Finally clicking to the realisation about what he had assumed, Y/N stood up quickly from the table.

“No no no no no… no!”

“Please, Y/N?!” Sirius got to his feet too.

“No! Sirius, how will that look? We’ll get in trouble with the Order and this is important intel, I hope.”

“I’m begging you Y/N.” Sirius implored. “I’ll drop to my knees if you want me to.”

Y/N was temporarily disarmed at the thought of bringing Sirius Black to his knees and he used this momentary lapse in concentration to his advantage.

“Look, she’ll be here any minute and you don’t have to be you.”

“What do you mean? She knows who I am. We work in the same department remember. Unless you have some Polyjuice on hand but I doubt there is a wizard or witch Rita Skeeter won’t recognise. She gets everywhere.”

“No not Polyjuice - she doesn’t know your animagus form!” Sirius was grinning artfully at Y/N who was again temporally shocked by another request.

Sirius pushed forward before Y/N could react to the fact he knew she was an animagus, “I said there was someone joining us tonight - I didn’t say it was human!” Sirius paused, an infinitesimal air of hesitancy about him, “You can pretend to be my pet.”

“YOUR PET?!” Y/N took a swipe at him from across the table which he easily dodged by catching her hand in his.

“You’d make a great pet Y/N and I’ll be sure to treat you right.” He laughed at her snarl and pitiful attempt to hit him again.

Before Y/N could voice her outrage there was a knock at the door.

Both froze.

“Sirius!” Y/N tired to reason with him. “You haven’t even seen my animagus form - how did you even know I was one?”

“Tonks told me.” He smirked again.

Tonks. Y/N growled under her breath already planning what she was going to do the next time she saw that metamorphmagus.

“It can’t be that bad.” Sirius held on to Y/N’s hand still, as he strode around the table, heading towards the door. “T said you were some sort of cat?”

Y/N looked at him for a full 10 seconds, contemplating her options. Another, more impatient knock rang out in the hallway.

“Please Y/N?” Sirius beseeched her.

She looked into the perfect face of Sirius Black, his sharp jawline flecked with stubble, chiseled cheek bones flanked by waves shoulder length black hair. She couldn’t say no to this face and in all honesty she was starting to believe that this might be fun.

“Yes, I’m a cat.”

“Please Y/N. Sirius begged again. “ I’ll owe you big time.”

“Fine, but be careful what you wish for.” A reckless freedom had swept over Y/N and perhaps tonight would prove to be an excellent moment to test the waters with Sirius - see just how sincere he was and how far he was willing to go to owe her one.

“Great!” Sirius stood close to Y/N and wrapped her in a furious bear hug. “I’ll grab the door and you just.. um change. Don’t leave my side ok?”

“Ok.”

“Just do cat things: get in the way, sit on my lap etcetera.”

“Your lap?!” Y/N raised an eyebrow at him.

To his credit he blushed. “Strictly to help me create a barrier with Rita and all that.”

Y/N had not seen Sirius blush before. “Ok - I’ll do cat things and keep her away from you.”

Sirius squeezed her once again before turning and walking out the room as the forth and final knock sounded loudly on the front door.

A small smile crept onto Y/N’s lips as she thought of Sirius asking her to sit on his lap. Whatever happened tonight, that request alone was going to be worth the potential telling off they could get from the Order if anyone found out what they were doing tonight. 

This was going to be fun.

---

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