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iamthenightcolormeblack · 4 years ago

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Impressions of Bride and Prejudice (2004)

I finally watched this movie as it is currently free on YouTube! It's a really interesting "modern-day" adaptation (specifically a Bollywood musical) of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice which takes place in Amritsar, India, London, England and California, USA instead of the English countryside. It stars Aishwarya Rai as Elizabeth Bennet (now Lalita Bakshi) and Martin Henderson as Mr. Darcy (William Darcy).

Names:

Bakshis = Bennets

Jaya Bakshi = Jane Bennet

Lalita Bakshi = Elizabeth Bennet

Maya Bakshi = Mary Bennet

Lakhi Bakshi = Lydia Bennet (Kitty isn't included here)

Kholi Saab = Mr. Collins

Balraj = Bingley

Chandra Lamba = Charlotte Lucas

Kiran = Caroline Bingley

Darcy's mother (Catherine Darcy) = Lady Catherine de Bourgh

The Casting:

Aishwarya Rai as Lalita Bakshi. She's captivating and beautiful as Lalita, with intelligence and wits to match. The film understands why Elizabeth Bennet is one of literature's greatest heroines: she has a lot of self-respect, speaks her mind, and refuses to compromise on her values. What's most important is that she achieves the balance between the two clashing cultures: she cares about her family and respects Indian traditions yet is also a strong individual who keeps her dignity.

Martin Henderson as William Darcy. I don't like that Darcy is an American in this movie because (in general) Americans are usually less reserved than British people, so it takes away a key part of Darcy's character (his repressed emotions). He's much more sympathetic than book Darcy because he seems to be more open-minded towards Indian culture the more he learns about it (unlike book Darcy, who is stubborn and insists that his "good opinion once lost is lost forever"). In the book, Darcy's pride has several characteristics (belief in the correctness of his opinions, belief in his social superiority, bad treatment of others he thinks is beneath him). I don't like how the film simplified his pride into imperialism/ethnocentrism, which he lets go of pretty quickly. Plus his "rudeness" can easily be perceived as discomfort in a new cultural environment because he hasn't been exposed to Indian culture, whereas in the book it seems to be intentional (and Darcy acknowledges to Elizabeth that he was taught to treat others beyond his own social circle meanly). Overall I had rather too much sympathy for him because he's too easy to read; he's experiencing a lot of culture shocks which he isn't prepared for, and his imperialistic beliefs (which come from his mother) don't help. One of the reasons book Darcy is interesting is because he's mysterious; his emotions remain hidden and the only sign of his growing love for Elizabeth is his staring at her. This Darcy is just a typical white American boy who is in love with a woman far superior to him in terms of intellect and cultural awareness.

Nitin Ganatra as Kohli Saab. Mr. Collins is one of my favorite cringe characters ever and never fails to disappoint. In this movie, he's an accountant who lives in the Beverly Hills area in Southern California and is very arrogant because he thinks he's a big shot living close to celebrities in a one-of-a-kind colonial home (when in actuality he lives in a cookie-cutter house in a suburb). He peppers his speech with Western slang to show off how "American" (and thus wealthy) he is, yet still clings to outmoded beliefs that women should be submissive housewives. He represents the very worst of Western culture in that he's materialistic and looks down on Indian culture as beneath him. In his quest for riches he has lost his Indian identity and become greedy.

Notable Scenes:

The first dance. Balraj is happy to have fun and show off his awesome dancing skills. Darcy, meanwhile, observes that the mothers are eyeing Balraj for the marriage market and is worried that his friend may be trapped by gold-diggers. He's clearly uncomfortable and out of his element here, so Kiran helps translate the songs for him. It's interesting seeing Kiran as a translator here because it would explain why she's one of the few people Darcy hangs out with; she's a cultural intermediary here to help him acclimate to a strange new environment.

Darcy snubs Lalita. This part in the book where Darcy insults Elizabeth by proclaiming her "tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me" is significant in forming Elizabeth's hatred of Darcy. Not only is he impolite in refusing to dance with Elizabeth, he also shames her by criticizing her looks. In the movie, Darcy excuses himself from dancing with Lalita by saying that he's busy preparing for a conference (in this version, he's a rich businessman who operates luxury hotels). I wish they had kept the original insult in because without it, Lalita's dislike of Darcy has less merit. While it was impolite of him to not dance, he did use a proper excuse and didn't insult Lalita, so unlike in the book, it doesn't make sense why she would hate him so intensely after that one meeting.

A Marriage Has Come to Town song. In this song-and-dance number, Lalita and Jaya are preparing for the wedding to Balraj. The whole town is excited for the wedding and Lalita wonders if life for a woman is all about getting married to be a mere wife: "It seems they had nothing in their lives before today / and why are they so happy to give a daughter away."

Darcy and Lalita conversation #1: Lalita points out most Amritsar residents can't afford to stay at Darcy's luxury hotels; Darcy says standards are necessary, justifying the high price. Darcy says he finds arranged marriages strange and "backwards," hinting at an affinity with Lalita as they are both "romantics." Lalita, still thinking that Darcy is attempting to insult Indian culture, says that arranged marriages have evolved and may not be so evil as he thinks it is.

Lalita and Darcy "accomplished woman" scene. So they have the part from the book where they have Darcy's unrealistic list of the characteristics of his perfect woman and then it becomes a culture clash. Lalita says Darcy's whole hotel business is imperialism (the tourists visit without appreciating Indian culture and the jobs created only benefit the well-off). Darcy replies: "But I'm not British" ("American exceptionalism" is just another form of imperialism).

Dinner with Kohli Saab. I love watching all the "Dinner with Mr. Collins" scenes from all Pride and Prejudice adaptations because it reveals Collins' great arrogance in assuming himself to be of greater importance than he is, as well as his bad manners. This movie does not disappoint; Kohli Saab literally eats with his fingers, shoving rice into his mouth while talking at the same time. Meanwhile, he spews out misogynistic views of women, stating that he came to India to find a "traditional" wife who will serve and obey him; after all, there is "no life without wife." He notes that the Indian-American girls have "a conceited sort of independence" (not what he actually said in the movie, this is a quote from the book which really fits here) and that some of the Indian-American girls "have turned into the lesbian." Lalita later recalls that watching Kohli Saab eat is like observing "a Jackson Pollock painting."

"No Life Without Wife" song. An accurate reading of Kholi Saab: he's "crude and loud" and came to find a wife by flashing his "green card, new house, and big cash." The song reveals what a hypocrite he is; he's lonely and pathetic because there is "no life without wife" yet he won't respect his wife as his equal. I love the "Kohliwood" fantasy sequence where Lalita pictures herself unhappily serving Kohli as a submissive wife. After the song ends Lalita imagines herself marrying Wickham in the English countryside before it turns out Darcy is the groom; she runs away from him.

The Cobra dance. Maya shows off her dancing skills in an awkward dance. Kholi criticizes Indians for being "unsophisticated" (what an arrogant person) while Darcy, in a change of heart, praises how highly they value family.

Kholi's proposal. I love how he tries to train himself to power walk because it's trendy and before proposing stretches himself clumsily, knocking over a pot (he definitely isn't husband material). Lalita mocks Kholi's obsession with physical health, pointing out that many people are physically healthy but don't exercise their minds.

Visiting Kiran. Kiran is arrogant and takes the Bakshis over to her fancy apartment where the mother tries and fails to show some cultural knowledge. I find it interesting that the movie made Lalita and Kiran foils of each other. They are both intelligent women who are "multicultural" in that they can navigate both Indian and Western culture, but they use their cultural knowledge in different ways. Kiran uses it to belittle others and demonstrate her own superiority, while Lalita uses it as a means of gaining respect for herself and others.

Darcy ends up on the same airplane flight as Lalita. This is a cute scene where he gives the first class seat to Mrs. Bakshi just so he can sit with Lalita in economy class (he's totally in love with her!).

Kohli Saab's epic house tour. Love how he pays great attention to the jet tubs and the closets.

Meeting Darcy's mom. She's totally ethnocentric and possibly racist. The first thing she asks Lalita is "tell me about India" and she expresses her disappointment at Darcy's decision (because of Lalita, it's so obvious he's in love) not to buy the hotel in India because "everybody has their hand on India these days" (brings to mind spheres of influence/colonialism since the mother sees India as a place to make a profit). Then the mother reveals that she really isn't interested in India and only knows about its stereotypes: "well, with yoga, and spices, and...wonderful Eastern things here there's no point in traveling there anymore." Meanwhile Lalita retorts that "people haven't stopped going to Italy because Pizza Hut's around the corner."

The first proposal. Darcy's conflicted feelings for Lalita are effectively summed up (perhaps better than in the book, where he begins well but ends with a long account of the inferiority of Elizabeth's connections): "he loves her in spite of the fact that he tried to forget about her, he still wants to marry her in spite of the fact that his family (specifically his mom) will disapprove." Unfortunately, the emphasis on the social inferiority of Lalita's family is left out; Darcy doesn't say anything else until Lalita claims that he thinks her family is inferior and blames him for separating Jaya and Balraj. I don't like this because it seems like the separation of Jaya and Balraj was the only reason Elizabeth rejected Darcy. Also Elizabeth's admission that she did try to overlook her prejudice of Darcy doesn't make sense, because only after the first proposal does she do so.

Plot Changes. The major plot points are all included but the "order of events" has changed:

Lalita and Darcy become friends and she meets his family before his disastrous first proposal. There's a montage where they are traveling alone together, visiting the Grand Canyon and sharing a moment on the beach. I don't like this change because Darcy's separating Jane and Bingley wasn't the only reason Elizabeth rejected him, it was because she hated him (arrogant, proud, doesn't treat others nicely). By showing early on that Darcy is a good person, Lalita's prejudice against Darcy makes less sense because she now has a glimpse of Darcy's true character which in the book doesn't happen until the Pemberley visit.

Their early friendship disrupts Darcy's character journey because it reduces the significance of the first proposal to his character development. In the book, he doesn't start to reform himself until Elizabeth tells him that he needs to behave in a "more gentleman-like manner."

The first proposal is the consequence of all the miscommunication and false perceptions affecting Elizabeth and Darcy, and it motivates both characters to change. Elizabeth rightly scolds Darcy for being inconsiderate; he did the proposal for the selfish reason of purging his feelings so that he wouldn't have to suffer anymore and assumed that she would say yes. Elizabeth rejects him because of his rude manners and lack of consideration, and his defensiveness (where he portrays himself as the victim of feelings and implies he's such a good boy for wanting to marry her in spite of her horrid family) doesn't help. After realizing the extent to which Elizabeth hates him, Darcy writes The Letter to set things right, and Elizabeth realizes that she is not the best judge of character. Thus, giving us a fuller picture of Darcy's character and letting him charm Lalita before the first proposal reduces the significance of the event to the plot and character development.

Wickham and Lakhi have a connection early on, making Lakhi's attempted elopement inevitable. Right after the failed first proposal, Lakhi runs off with Wickham and Lalita and Darcy find out about it at the same time that Darcy comes to apologize and tell Lalita that Wickham is bad. I love that Wickham was punished really badly; after Darcy fights him, he gets slapped twice, once by Lalita and the second time by Lakhi. Even better is that Lakhi doesn't end up with Wickham.

Themes

The film uses the culture clash between India (Eastern) and Western cultures to examine what makes a good marriage.

Indian culture as presented by the film is more collectivist ("we" over "I"). It also promotes traditional gender roles, with women expected to be "meek and submissive" wives. In contrast, Western culture in the film is more individualistic and aspirational (careers and love are possible). But at its worst it condones exploitation of others for profit and cultural intolerance.

In the book, there are different kinds of "culture clashes:" traditional nobility versus new money (the Bingleys made their fortune in trade and Caroline is hoping to be an accomplished woman to make up for this), country versus city (Darcy offending Mrs. Bennet by claiming that the society is "confined and unvarying") and arranged versus romantic marriages.

The misunderstandings that propel the story (Darcy's dismissing of Elizabeth as "tolerable," him falling in love with her even though she still hates him, her belief in the legitimacy of "first impressions") are emphasized through the culture clash. Many of the conflicts in the film are a result of cultural stereotypes and conflicting beliefs.

Interestingly the film doesn't resolve the question it raises of how best to appreciate India and its culture. Lalita raises a lot of points about not oversimplifying Indian culture to a few stereotypes, but one could argue that India as represented by the film might be stereotypical. With the exception of the resort scenes and Goa beaches (which are tourist traps according to the film), the scenes in India heavily emphasize the "developing country" aspects of India with lots of pastoral scenes (cows crossing the road unharmed, farmland, dirt, shacks, dirty motorcycles fighting each other in traffic). Plus the "culture" as represented by the film's dance sequences seems to be the dominant Hindu culture with lots of elephants and saris and curry. Yes, I know this film is a romantic comedy, but the assertion that India is a complex, diverse country is contradicted by what we are presented. Presenting the rustic aspects of India would explain why the characters want to get out of India and go to the richer Western nations, but it harms the premise of the story that we shouldn't judge based on first impressions because the India scenes seem to confirm a Westerner's stereotypes of India (exotic people living in a primitive land).

Changing views on marriage: In the film, as in the book, we are presented with traditional and modern views on what makes a good marriage. Mr. Collins' marriage represents the traditional view in which marriage is a practical "economic proposition," much like a business deal where the marriage is made for the securing of material wealth and happiness comes last. Lady Catherine and other members of the aristocracy view marriage as a means of producing heirs (and bringing large amounts of money through dowries) to keep the property (source of power and wealth) in the family. The modern view of marriage is a partnership of equals who love and respect each other; happiness rather than material wealth/power is the priority. It threatens the power of the traditional nobles as it provides the potential for social climbing. Finally, it becomes another part of the culture clash, as it also ties in with the Western value of individualism, putting it at odds with the more collectivist Indian culture as presented by the film.

Elizabeth and Darcy in the book and in the film are united by their belief in a marriage based on love (the modern view). In the film, Darcy says he wants to look forward to starting each day with his wife, while Lalita says she wants a man who is a romantic and respects her for her mind. For instance, Elizabeth states that "only the deepest love will induce me into matrimony" and that Jane and Bingley should have some time to get to know each other before being rushed into marriage. To Elizabeth, mutual love and respect are essential for a marriage to succeed.

As for book Darcy, when Caroline catches him admiring Elizabeth and asks if he will marry her right away, he jokingly rebuffs her for making that assumption: "A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment. I knew you would be wishing me joy." Significantly, he mentions love needing to come before marriage, hinting that he shares the same belief about respect (admiration) and love being necessary for a good marriage. In fact, a big reason he separated Jane from Bingley was because he feared that Jane did not love Bingley in return. In short, love in marriage is just as important to Darcy as it is to Elizabeth.

Conclusion:

Bride and Prejudice, as shown by the title, focuses heavily on the theme of marriage and uses the culture clash between India and the West to emphasize the importance of first impressions in our treatment of others.

Even if you aren't into Pride and Prejudice, the movie is worth watching for the Bollywood dance sequences. I also liked the songs because they effectively developed the marriage theme.

The characters are mostly true to the book, except for Darcy, who isn't proud enough and is quick to reform his character.

Last but not least, the real villains of the story were imperialism and ethnocentrism.

Tags: @thatvermilionflycatcher @appleinducedsleep @princesssarisa

#bride and prejudice #aishwarya rai #martin henderson #bollywood #pride and prejudice #jane austen #mr darcy #elizabeth bennet #elizabeth x darcy #book adaptation #adaptation

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inviouswriting · 4 years ago

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Let us try.

Arjuna x fem!reader.

A little bit inspired from another writer @dontstalkhaleyshedontlikethat (sorry for a random tag btw! I think you might like this)

Leaving the premise as a surprise.

The path to marriage was long, the trust you had to build with Arjuna, before he opened the idea of being married again. You were surprised when he had asked you, he resorted to the traditional methods of your cultures with a ring instead of his own.

You knew you’d say yes and did. After that point it was a whirlwind of other servants helping put together the ceremony. From arrangements to time and place, you were nervous as you sat across from Arjuna, but at ease when personal and intimate vows were made. You noticed how his eyes never left your form, adorned in silks from his homeland as you went with a Indian style wedding to blend your lives together.

The reception itself was alive with everyone in celebration, too caught up with the festivities each to notice that you and your now husband slipping away for some much needed quiet. Noting how Karna waves you both off, to begin your lives together with Arjuna.

You sit with him near the bath in chaldea, your feet dipped in the water and leaning against him. His arm wound around you while holding onto one of your hands with his other.

Subtle kisses were pressed to the top of your head, and Arjuna gets your attention with you raising your head to look at him. The make up you wore made you appear more stunning to him, even more as this was a look you chose for him. Yet you don’t bat an eye as he dips a cloth into the water to begin to take it off, more to not smear it. The air around you seemed to be quiet save for the water that poured into the bath pool.

Arjuna presses the first kiss since the altar, and you return it. Your hands seek out his as he unwraps you from the dress, your hands equally tugging his clothes free to feel and see dark skin under your palms. You kiss the light brown of his palm earning a flush on his face.

Your blush afterwards when the last of your layers were removed, and he tugs you with him into the water where he guides you to a secluded spot out of view to anyone who may even dare come in.

You felt shy as Arjuna looks over your form, getting you to sit with him to assure you, it is only him there. Even as you feel the push of him into you. You grip his hand hard that he worried he had hurt you.

“I’m fine, Arjuna. Keep going please.” A thumb pushes away a tear that strayed down your cheek and continued to love you. He’d never forget the way you call his name, or how you bit your own fingers to keep from screaming. He had to tug your hand and hold it after that.

You wouldn’t forget the look within his eyes, tender and soft regarding you with concern and love. The haughty stare he had in those dark brown eyes when he focused on your pleasure first. The blissful expression that crosses his face when he allows the mask to come off and enjoy himself.

When you both had peaked, you had each other in the deepest kiss you could manage, holding onto each other tight.

A hand ghosting down your face, fingers trailing along a cheek to feel it. You meet him in the same manner, your hands touching and feeling him for the first time. Learning the way he likes to be touched from your hands. Noting how he seems to love your hands cupping his face when you kiss him.

When you retreated to your shared room now, you both spent it learning more of each other as husband and wife. When you had teased him too much and tried escaping he had pulled you back by a foot with a laugh that had you melting.

You both fell into a rhythm together, this stretched into the honeymoon you two take. Going to an onsen hotel he had wanted to go to. Spending alot of time being pampered by him, that when you return home you were certain every part of you was still relaxed.

Arjuna settles for a more domestic role in this lifetime, even with the holy grail wars looming around. You both set aside time for each other, your bond secure with him, in both spirit and marital now. With his style more relaxed, you see the stress and worries seemed to disappear around you. You had asked him how he felt.

“Hm? I thought you could tell. I’m happy with you. Love.” He only used “master” when in front of other servants, alone it was terms of endearments, love, dear, you had blushed when he said “my wife.” for the first time. Your face redder when you tried matching his wit with calling him “your husband” only earning his genuine smile.

Your lives melded together perfectly, the love you two made always full and caring. That when he asked a specific question, you felt your face heat up.

“My wife, let us try for a child?” He had taken a hand to start luring you into bed with him. You let him, you could never deny him when he had that look in his eyes. You felt hotter underneath him, even hearing him moan out for a chance when your nails went down his back. When you were dazed afterwards, your fingers drawing patterns on his chest.

“Arjuna. We don’t have to try for one.” You feel him shift to look at you, tense in his body. Worried you were rejecting the idea. You look down to him after sitting up on his waist, taking his hands into your own.

“We’re already going to have one.” Realization in his eyes, then excitement.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” A breathless comment as he sits up to draw you into a full kiss.

“I was about to, then you had that look on your face.” You squeak when he flips you onto your back underneath him. His hands now splayed across your abdomen. You take one of his hands looking at his palm the color difference from it to the top of his hand at the side.

“Oho? Look on my face. Let me show you my excitement then.” His hand covers yours lacing fingers together. You nod giving him permission. Only to see him rest his head on your belly. Your hands smooth through his tousled hair thoroughly messed from earlier when you pulled on it when his mouth was on you.

The love he lures you into after that, was more tender and sweet than you remember since your wedding night with him. Him doing his best not to be rough. You feel relaxed once you were in his arms, his hands feeling your stomach.

Over time he enjoyed resting his head on your stomach often to sense the life inside. In these soft moments you would run fingers through his hair and listen to his laments. Wondering if he would be a better father in this lifetime than his previous one. You assure him each step of the way.

You both forgo knowing the gender of the child until the day of birth. Arjuna with you that day and helped assist. Being the first person besides you and the doctor to hold the daughter you brought into the world. He had only had sons before, a daughter he wasn’t prepared for, much like the life he built with you.

Arjuna stays with you, curled next to you with a finger held by the tiny lighter skinned hand gripping it. You beam proudly at him.

“You’re already doing so well.” He looks away with a flush to his face.

“Get some rest for now, I’ll be with you both when you wake. I’ll handle things so you can rest properly.” You nod and let him take your child to sit with.

You feel blessed. You don’t miss the mirth in his eyes. Not a single thing goes unnoticed that he hides his face in the soft brown skin of his child’s cheek.

“I love you.” You hear him.

“I love you too, Arjuna.”

#fgo arjuna #arjuna smut #fate arjuna #arjuna x reader #arjuna

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wongiemei · 5 years ago

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3. Social Darwinism

A rash has slightly developed on your neck where the sun hit it just right without the defense of your coat. It was very uncomfortable but you didn’t let it bother you, instead focusing ahead outside the window. After your shopping trip with Jaehyun, you felt like it was time to go home even though you wanted to stay longer and didn’t want to be trapped in that house.

It’s been weeks since the wedding but you felt like it was longer.

The car stopped, the driver stepping out and walking over to your side before opening your door so that you can get off.

“Your highness,” he greeted before bowing and extending his hand out for you to take.

You gratefully nodded and grasped his gloved hand to step out of the vehicle, adjusting the sunglasses that has fallen to the bridge of your nose. The chauffeur went to the trunk to retrieve your shopping bags and luggage from your trip to France.

The smell of the daisies and the roses from the garden out back was so strong that you were sure anyone, even without super senses, could smell it.

You loved the smell of roses.

Heels clacking against the marble floor of the entrance hallway, the maids stopped in their tracks and hastily bowed 90 degrees upon the sight of you. As you raised your hand to take of your sunglasses, some of them visibly flinched and it unconsciously placed a smirk on your face.

You’re worked so hard to be feared and you have lost so much to be at the status you are now and you weren’t going to let that go to waste because of a stupid little boy.

The butler, whom you now know as Jun, led a few footmen who were carrying your luggage and stopped a few feet behind you. With a flick of his gloved hand, the maids were dismissed and they scurried away from the sight of you.

“Take these to the Head Maid and she will take them to Her Highness’ room.” The footmen nodded and wandered off to the old woman waiting by the staircase. Jun stepped in front of you and smiled kindly before raising an arm. “If you could follow me, your Highness. The Prince has requested your attendance to the drawing room.”

Upon walking down the hallway with gold-painted walls, you could feel the eyes of the portraits that hung up high. Although they weren’t even supposed to be real, the judgeful eyes of the past ancestors of the Orenda kingdom seemed to follow you and you could even hear their hateful whispers and hisses.

‘Kalon blood, on our territory?’

‘Perish and repay the lives lost of our House for yours!’

‘Dirty blood mixed with ours will taint the House line for eternity!’

The whispers weren’t even there but the creation of your imagination as you could feel yourself slowly slipping away to insanity with this forceful arrangement that altered your life forever. With the gender you were born with and the belief that no woman could rule a kingdom, the only way you could have what you wanted was to ally yourself with your rival House.

But the only way you’ll keep your sanity is to play wisely and not hesitate to let him burn for the benefit of you.

Pushing open the tall oak wood doors, you were a little startled at the amount of faces when you only expected one, your husband’s. Even without getting to formally know them, it was still your duty as a royal to be familiar with all of them as they were all princes from various kingdoms of your world. From the honey-haired boy to the ridiculously bright orange-haired prince, the only thing that they all had in common was the bright red eyes.

The stark difference between the twin princes of the Cerilian House was enough to show the diversity of the line of their ancestors. Situated in the Indian Ocean, their kingdom could easily prey on poor fishermen filled with luscious human blood.

Born with platinum hair, Lee Jeno always stood out from the rest of the 4 Lee princes and combined with his defined facial structure, he became feared and his ruthlessness was enough to make him Jaemin’s right man. He was the one Jaemin called first regarding the ambush attack on his family from House Pezzerio and together, they became the most feared duo in the Underworld. Even though he rarely spoke during council meetings, Jeno’s eyes always held whatever he wanted to be expressed and he was known to always keep an eye out for his brothers and the crown prince, Taeyong. Rumor has it that Jeno’s eyes and ears are so sharp, he could easily detect a traitor from across the room. There is no definite answer as to if this was true but who do you think was supplying his brother, Donghyuck, his toys?

Meanwhile, Lee Donghyuck stayed in the shadows. Known as the playboy prince, he often stayed away from his kingdom, preferring to spend his time in Tuscany with human girls to feast on. The melanin, honey haired boy wouldn’t even be thought of as a vampire, much less a vampire prince, due to his soft features. However, out of the 4 princes, he was the most cruel. He saw the world and its people, human or Underworlders, as toys and nothing but his source of enjoyment in this dark world he lived in. Like his brother Jeno, their smile could be saying one thing but their eyes were always very honest, especially if it didn’t reach their eyes. With a dangerously playful nature, Donghyuck participated in the torture of war criminals and traitors of House Cerilian and had a thirst for the look of intense pain from the enemy as he used his lighter to tease the fragile vampire skin.

House Dormir was placed on the East China Sea, extending to the North Pacific Ocean and ending near Hawaii. With the vast territory, their kingdom usually split up in 2 different sections with 2 princes who co-ruled the kingdom. With the Orendian and Kalonian kingdom being smaller even when combined, House Dormir was known to sometimes challenge the authority of the Capital just because of the size of their territory.

Being a direct ancestor of the original line of Dormir kings, Zhong Chenle became powerful even before he turned 12. The death of his King father and older brother urged his mother to make him mature quicker with plans of ascending the throne by his 18th birthday but he wasn’t prepared. Rebelling against his mother and doing anything he can to piss her off, he teamed up with Jisung and constantly did childish things to make their immaturity known. Showing up with orange hair definitely caught the attention of the council and they knew this little boy was going to bring Dormir’s downfall. In came the 3 older princes: Jaemin, Donghyuck, and Jeno. At first, he was being used as a pawn for the Orendian Kingdom and the Cerilian Kingdom wanted to take over his large territory and split it for themselves. But Chenle was smarter than that and he threatened the 3 enough that they stopped the expansion, instead becoming close to the boy after seeing themselves in him.

However, this couldn’t be done without the help of Chenle’s cousin and the future ruler of the other half of Dormir, Renjun. With his quick wit and intelligent way of thinking, Renjun helped Chenle play many wars to get what he wanted. Not knowing if he was going to be trusted, Chenle was suspicious but Renjun has made it clear with his clear intentions as he only wants to rule alongside Chenle. After all, with Chenle by his side, everyone was forced to submit to him due to the power his family has. Known as the Night Raven, after his famous midnight colored hair, Renjun called the shots whether captured criminals got to live another day or not. He knew exactly where someone’s weakness was and would mercilessly torture them with it, all with a smile on his face. Let’s just say, him and Donghyuck get along very well.

Last but not least, the little pink haired boy. Known as the last surviving son of House Vermille, Park Jisung built a strong connection to Zhong Chenle and by association, became connected to the rest. You knew him ever since you were little and saw him as a little boy in the parties you were forced to attend and his mousy features that have defined itself due to his growth. You always remembered him as the boy with the sharpest teeth as whenever he smiled, he would accidentally cut his bottom lip and him sheepishly smiling afterwards. His innocent and adolescent nature made you feel nostalgic because you wanted to take him under your wing since he was so young. With just turning 140 a few months ago, Jisung was by far the youngest crown prince and the least capable. You vaguely remembered when he turned 115, he reached the age of intense hunger and he wiped out an entire French village thus almost causing a war with Metanoia. But, your family stopped the war because House Kalon, too, had territory in France and they didn’t want to jeopardize the alliance they’ve made to the kingdom in the Atlantic Ocean near Languo.

Of course, you knew them.

The perfect plan to obtain Underworld domination was to start a fire in this room as it contained the most powerful people in the Underworld.

All of the boys studied you and you cracked a smirk, crossing your arms across your chest. “Well, hello boys,” you greeted with a sultry tone.

Closing the door behind you, you stopped short by the end of the oval wood table that seated your husband at the head. Making eye contact with him, Jaemin smiled before he stood up and walked over to you, arms wrapping around your middle and pressing a slow kiss to your temple.

“Hello, darling. How was your trip?” Jaemin asked with a sickeningly sweet tone that made you wretch inside.

Placing a gentle hand on his strong bicep, you peered up at him through your lashes. “Enjoyable, but not pleasing enough.” You answered with a smile but grit your teeth and squeezed his arm the hardest you could and his smile fell, replaced with a hardened expression.

Oh, he is going to destroy you later.

“You could’ve told me your little friends were coming. I could’ve came back earlier and arranged for scones,” you gazed at the others who wore faint amused smirks at the interaction in front of them.

Jaemin’s gaze remained on your face and you felt it piercing through your cheeks, “There was a human boy found wandering the woods. He will serve as our refreshment.”

Nodding silently, you took a seat beside Jisung and laced your fingers together. “So what has brought you all to this side of town?”

“Malor just lost an entire noble family in England a few days ago from vampire hunting. They planned to stay in Yorkshire for a few months for vacation but word got around of their true identity and burned their vacation home. The Council wants to know our opinion about it and the family wants us to deal with it. Something about this being a trial run for the future.” Jeno explained as he visibly tried to get comfortable while crossing his legs.

Jaemin nods and he returns to his seat and leans back, brushing his long fingers through his hair. You unknowingly licked your lips at the action and only noticed your behavior as he caught your eye and looked at you teasingly. You coughed and held your right hand out to examine your nail.

“Well, Malor is quite known for their, should I say -idiotic- elites. Vacationing in a country that has vampire stories riding the winds and not expecting to be hunted with no hesitation? Consider me improper but they deserved their demise.”

Donghyuck let out a dry chuckle and rested his elbows on the table, resting his chin on his right hand. “I must say, princess. I never considered you as the deserving justice type.”

You returned his cheeky smile with a wink, “If I were to rule the Underworld, I would make sure the weak and stupid ones were gone first, right? It would be better if it wasn’t done by my hand.”

“Applying Social Darwinism to your court? A bold yet risky move,” Renjun commented, eyeing you curiously.

It must be odd seeing a woman speak so rashly and freely about topics like these, much less a royal woman.

“Our world can only survive if we get rid of weaklings. Sorry, but I don’t make the rules.”

Chuckles surrounded the table and even Jeno had to suppress the smile that threatened to come out. Jaemin looked at you once more and he started to think differently of what he originally thought was a privileged, spoiled brat who only wanted the crown of jewels on her head, not the responsibility.

It was the good kind of different.

“Well, because of that rash attitude, the union of your houses has caused quite an uproar with an underground resistance that is forming in the Capital as we speak. The war from years ago is still fresh in the minds of many and are outraged at the outcome of the 2 kingdoms. Word has it that they are planning an attack and it is even sponsored by other kingdoms as well. My men have no guaranteed answers and no direct evidence for the suspected Houses or whether the attack is directed to you or to us by association.” You eyed Jeno curiously and noticed the strong aura he radiated. It felt familiar but strangely ominous and made you nervous.

“Well, why don’t we catch them now? We know there’s a rebellion happening and we know that they’re planning something. Are we just going to stand and wait for it to happen?” Jisung argued and Chenle nodded in agreement, looking at the faces of the elders.

You turned to him and placed a manicured hand on Jisung’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, little mouse. A lesson about war, it is in your best interest for the enemy to come to you. Thinking on your feet is the best way to win and as a bonus, requires less thinking which should be beneficial for you.”

“So, what you’re saying is, they should come to us rather than us going to them?” Chenle asked curiously, confused by this battle tactic.

You nodded, “Precisely.”

“If they are planning something, it’s only natural for you two to be the target since you’re the future king and queen. Someone might be taken as an exchange for you but it’s suspected and there might be a way to escape that,” Renjun commented.

You frowned, slightly confused and even a little shocked at what they were saying. “Don’t focus on only the two of us. All of you are princes as well and it’s only wrong for you to be thinking about our safety. Regard your titles as you are also a royal member of your respective kingdoms. Any action placed upon you can cause a war and a rebellion amongst the people and give them more power. The last thing we need is an internal conflict that could possibly weaken us.”

But Jaemin grinned cynically, razor sharp teeth on display. “Oh, darling, you don’t have to think about that. If something were to happen to my boys, with the combination of our armies, we could crush anything. I could feel a revolution running through my veins and with the help of them, we could destroy those other treacherous kingdoms.”

“So what do you have in mind, Jaems? What could bring them to us?” Donghyuck asked, lazily playing with a stain on the wood.

Both you and Jaemin looked at each other and you scoffed as you seem to be thinking what he was thinking.

“An auction. Human auction.” He answered and Donghyuck smiled happily, eager to find more beings to play with.

“There is no certainty that we will find a King that is sponsoring this rebellion but it could give us a good idea that could help narrow it down. We must not be rash about this situation but we must be on high-alert as well.” Nods were sent to you and Jaemin sent you an approving nod.

“Well there we have it! We got a plan, we execute the said plan, and we live happily ever after! Huzzah!” Donghyuck exclaimed, rising out of his seat.

But Jeno tugged down his shirt and made him fall back on his seat again. “Not so fast, Dongie. We still have to talk about your magical adventure in Milan that caused a few dozens of missing girls’ cases to appear.”

You stood up, brushing invisible dust off of your skirt. “As much as I would love to ask about your insane thirst for young, virgin maidens, Donghyuck, I do have a party to plan.”

“But it’s not a party,” Jaemin remarked. You scoffed and sent him a manic smile.

“With wine, cocaine, and blood? Oh, yes, my love. It is a party.”

The bed creaked as a series of powerful thrusts of his hips snapped towards you, making you whine and gasping for air. Your arms were starting to give out, letting Jaemin hold you up by your waist and continue slamming himself into you. Sweat gathered on his forehead and left his luscious blonde locks to plaster themselves against his porcelain skin.

“I” thrust

“Am” thrust

“Your” thrust

“King” thrust

“Understand?” thrust

A high-pitched whine left your lips as he sunk deeper into you, relishing the satisfaction of him touching you places you couldn’t even fathom was possible.

Not hearing your response, Jaemin let one of his hands go and swiftly twisted your hair into a make-shift ponytail and tugged you close, lifting you so you were against his chest and on his lap. The sudden action made you scream since he sank even deeper.

“I said, understand?” He hissed and you couldn’t even control yourself, whining and moaning at the sharp thrusts.

“Yes, my king.”

“Good.”

a/n: not gonna lie, this was kinda weird to write and severely overdue. THANK YOU to you guys who stuck by me even though i haven’t updated in a while and never stopped supporting me!! i love you guys!!

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@d0dges @bobohu-s-ane-yeobo @heyyyun @thwia

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grigori77 · 4 years ago

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Summer 2020′s Movies - My Top Ten Favourite Films (Part 2)

10. BODY CAM – in the face of the current pandemic, viral outbreak cinema has become worryingly prescient lately, but as COVID led to civil unrest there were a couple of films in this summer that REALLY seemed to me to put their finger on the pulse of another particularly shitty zeitgeist. Admittedly this one highlights a problem that’s been around for a good while, but it came along at just the right time to gain particularly strong resonance, filtering its message into the most reliable form of allegorical social commentary – horror. The vengeful ghost trope has become pretty familiar over the past decade or so, but by marrying it with the corrupt cop thriller veteran horror screenwriter Nicholas McCarthy (The Pact) has given it a nice fresh spin, and the end result was, for me, a real winner. Mary J. Blige plays troubled LAPD cop Renee Lomito-Smith, back on the beat after an extended hiatus following a particularly harrowing incident, just as fellow officers from her own precinct begin to die violent deaths under mysterious circumstances, and the only clues are weird, haunting camera footage that only Renee and her new partner, rookie Danny Holledge (Paper Towns and Death Note’s Natt Wolff), manage to see before it inexplicable wipes itself. Something supernatural is stalking the City of Angels at night, and it’s got a serious grudge against local cops as the increasingly disturbing investigation slowly brings an act of horrific police brutality to light, until Renee no longer knows who in her department she can trust. This is one of the most insidious scare-fests I’ve enjoyed so far this year, sophomore director Malik Vitthal (Imperial Dreams) weaving an effective atmosphere of pregnant dread and wire-taut suspense while delivering some impressively hair-raising shocks (the stunning minimart sequence is the film’s undeniable highlight), while the ghostly threat is cleverly thought-out and skilfully brought to “life”. Blige delivers another top-drawer performance, giving Renee a winning combination of wounded fragility and steely resolve that makes for a particularly compelling hero, while Wolff invests Danny with skittish uncertainty and vulnerability in one of his strongest performances to date, and Dexter star David Zayas brings interesting moral complexity to the role of their put-upon superior, Sergeant Kesper. In these times of heightened social awareness, when the police’s star has become particularly tarnished as unnecessary force, racial profiling and cover-ups have become major hot-button topics, the power and relevance of this particular slice of horror cinema cannot be denied.

9. BLOOD QUANTUM – it certainly has been a great year for horror, and for most of the summer this was the genre leader, a compellingly fresh take on the zombie outbreak genre with a killer hook. Canadian writer-director Jeff Barnaby (Rhymes for Young Ghouls) has always clung close to his Native American roots, and he brings strong social relevance to the intriguing early 80s Canadian setting as a really nasty zombie virus wreaks havoc in the Red Crow Indian Reservation and its neighbouring town. It soon becomes clear, however, that members of the local tribe are immune to the infection, a revelation with far-reaching consequences as the outbreak rages unchecked and society begins to crumble. Barnaby pulls off some impressive world-building and creates a compellingly grungy post-apocalyptic vibe as the story progresses, while the zombies themselves are a visceral, scuzzy bunch, and there’s plenty of cracking set-pieces and suitably full-blooded kills to keep the gore-hounds happy, while the horror has real intelligence behind it, the script posing interesting questions and delivering some uncomfortable answers. The characters, meanwhile, are a well-drawn, complex bunch, no black-and-white saviours among them, any one of them capable of some pretty inhuman horrors when the chips are down, and the cast, an interesting mix of seasoned talent and unknowns, all excel in their roles – Michale Greyeyes (Fear the Walking Dead) and Forrest Goodluck (The Revenant) are the closest things the film has to real heroes, the former a fallible everyman as Traylor, the small-town sheriff who’s just trying to do right by his family, the latter unsure of himself as his son, put-upon teenage father-to-be Joseph; meanwhile, Olivia Scriven is tough but vulnerable as his pregnant white girlfriend Charlie, Stonehorse Lone Goeman is a grizzled badass as tough-as-nails tribal elder Gisigu, and Kiowa Gordon (probably best known for playing a werewolf in the Twilight movies) really goes to the dark side as Joseph’s delinquent half-brother Lysol, while there’s a memorably subtle turn from Dead Man’s Gary Farmer as unpredictable loner Moon. This is definitely one of the year’s darkest films – by and large playing the horror straight, it tightens the screws as the situation grows steadily worse, and almost makes a virtue of wallowing in its hopeless tone – but there’s a fatalistic charm to all the bleakness, even in the downbeat yet tentatively hopeful climax, while it’s hard to deny the ruthless efficiency of the violence on display. This certainly isn’t a horror movie for everyone, but those with a strong stomach and relatively hard heart will find much to enjoy here. Jeff Barnaby is definitely gonna be one to watch in the future …

8. PALM SPRINGS – the summer’s comedy highlight kind of snuck in under the radar, becoming something of an on-demand secret weapon with all the cinemas closed, and it definitely deserves its swiftly growing cult status. You certainly can’t possibly believe it’s the feature debut of director Max Barbakow, who shows the kind of sharp-witted, steady-handed control of his craft that’s usually the province of far more experienced talents … then again, much of the credit must surely go to seasoned TV comedy writer Andy Siara (Lodge 49), for whom this has been a real labour of love he’s been tending since his film student days. Certainly all that care, nurture and attention to detail is up there on the screen, the exceptional script singing its irresistible siren song from the start and providing fertile ground for its promising new director to spread his own creative wings. The premise may be instantly familiar – playing like a latter-day Saturday Night Live take on Groundhog Day (Siara admits it was a major influence), it follows the misadventures of Sarah (How I Met Your Mother’s Cristin Miliota), the black sheep maid of honour at her sweet little sister Tala’s (Riverdale’s Camila Mendes) wedding to seemingly perfect hunk Abe (Supergirl’s Superman, Tyler Hoechlin), as she finds herself repeating the same high-stress day over and over again after being trapped in a mysterious cosmic time-loop along with slacker misanthrope Nyles (Brooklyn Nine Nine megastar Andy Samberg), who’s been stuck in this same situation for MUCH longer – but in Barbakow and Siara’s hands it feels fresh and intriguing, and goes in some surprising new directions before the well-worn central premise can outstay its welcome. It certainly doesn’t hurt that the cast are uniformly excellent – Miliota is certainly the pounding emotional heart of the film, effortlessly lovable as she flounders against her lot, then learns to accept the unique possibilities it presents, before finally resolving to find a way out, while Samberg has rarely been THIS GOOD, truly endearing in his sardonic apathy as it becomes clear he’s been stuck like this for CENTURIES, and they make an enjoyably fiery couple with snipey chemistry to burn; meanwhile there’s top-notch support from Mendes and Hoechlin, The OC’s Peter Gallagher as Sarah and Tala’s straight-laced father, the ever-reliable Dale Dickey, a thoroughly adorable turn from Jena Freidman and, most notably, a full-blooded scene-stealing performance from the mighty J.K. Simmonds as Roy, Nyles’ nemesis, who he inadvertently trapped in the loop before Sarah and is, understandably, none too happy about it. This really is an absolute laugh-riot, today’s more post-modern sense of humour allowing the central pair (and their occasional enemy) to indulge in even more extreme consequence-free craziness than Bill Murray ever got away with back in the day, but like all the best comedies there’s also a strong emotional foundation under the humour, leading us to really care about these people and what happens to them, while the story throws moments of true heartfelt power at us, particularly in the deeply cathartic climax. Ultimately this was one of the summer’s biggest surprises, a solid gold gem that I can’t recommend enough.

7. THE LAST DAYS OF AMERICAN CRIME – the summer’s other heavyweight Zeitgeist fondler is a deeply satirical chunk of speculative dystopian sci-fi clearly intended as a cinematic indictment of Trump’s broken America, but it became far more potent and prescient in these … ahem … troubled times. Adapted by screenwriter Karl Gadjusek (Oblivion, Stranger Things, The King’s Man) from the graphic novel by Rick Remender and Greg Tocchini for underrated schlock-action cinema director Olivier Megaton (Transporter 3, Colombiana, the last two Taken films), this Netflix original feature seemed like a fun way to kill a cinema-deprived Saturday night in the middle of the Lockdown, but ultimately proved to have a lot more substance than expected. It’s powered by an intriguing premise – in a nearly lawless 2024, the US government is one week away from implementing a nationwide synaptic blocker signal called the API (American Peace Initiative) which will prevent the public from being able to commit any kind of crime – and focuses on a strikingly colourful bunch of outlaw antiheroes with an audacious agenda – prodigious Detroit bank robber Bricke (Édgar Ramiréz) is enlisted by Kevin Cash (Funny Games and Hannibal’s Michael Carmen Pitt), a wayward scion of local crime family the Dumois, and his hacker fiancée Shelby Dupree (Material Girl’s Anna Brewster) to pull off what’s destined to be the last great crime in American history, a daring raid on the night of the signal to steal over a billion dollars from the Motor City’s “money factory” and then escape across the border into Canada. From this deceptively simple premise a sprawling action epic was born, carried along by a razor sharp, twisty script and Megaton’s typically hyperbolic, showy auteur directing style and significant skill at crafting thrillingly explosive set-pieces, while the cast consistently deliver quality performances. Ramiréz has long been one of those actors I really love to watch, a gruff, quietly intense alpha male whose subtle understatement hides deep reserves of emotional intensity, while Dupree takes a character who could have been a thinly-drawn femme fetale and invests her with strong personal drive and steely resolve, and there’s strong support from Neil Blomkampf regulars Sharlto Copley and Brandon Auret as, respectively, emasculated beat cop Sawyer and brutal Mob enforcer Lonnie French, as well as a nearly unrecognisable Patrick Bergin as local kingpin (and Kevin’s father) Rossi Dumois; the film is roundly stolen, however, by Pitt, a phenomenal actor I’ve always thought we just don’t see enough of, here portraying a spectacularly sleazy, unpredictable force of nature who clearly has his own dark agenda, but whom we ultimately can’t help rooting for even as he stabs us in the back. This is a cracking film, a dark and dangerous thriller of rare style and compulsive verve that I happily consider to be Megaton’s best film to date BY FAR – needless to say it was a major hit for Netflix when it dropped, clearly resonating with its audience given what’s STILL going on in the real world, and while it may have been roundly panned in reviews I think, like some of the platform’s other more glossy Original hits (Bright springs to mind), it’s destined for a major critical reappraisal and inevitable cult status before too long …

6. HAMILTON – arriving just as Black Lives Matter reached fever-pitch levels, this feature presentation of the runaway Broadway musical smash-hit could not have been better timed. Shot over three nights during the show’s 2016 run with the original cast and cut together with specially created “setup shots”, it’s an immersive experience that at once puts you right in amongst the audience (at times almost a character themselves, never seen but DEFINITELY heard) but also lets you experience the action up close. And what action – it’s an incredible show, a thoroughly fascinating piece of work that reads like something very staid and proper on paper (an all-encompassing biographical account of the life and times of American Founding Father Alexander Hamilton) but, in execution, becomes something very different and EXTREMELY vital. The execution certainly couldn’t be further from the usual period biopic fare this kind of historical subject matter usually gets (although in the face of recent top-notch revisionist takes like Marie Antoinette, The Great and Tesla it’s not SO surprising), while the cast is not at all what you’d expect – with very few notable exceptions the cast is almost entirely people of colour, despite the fact that the real life individuals they’re playing were all very white indeed. That said, every single one of them is an absolute revelation – the show’s writer-composer Lin-Manuel Miranda (already riding high on the success of In the Heights) carries the central role of Hamilton with effortless charm and raw star power, Leslie Odom Jr. (Smash, Murder On the Orient Express) is duplicitously complex as his constant nemesis Aaron Burr, Christopher Jackson (In the Heights, Moana, Bull) oozes integrity and nobility as his mentor and friend George Washington, Phillipa Soo is sweet and classy as his wife Eliza while Renée Elise Goldsberry (The Immortal Life of Henrietta Jacks, Altered Carbon) is fiery and statuesque as her sister Angelica Schuyler (the one who got away), and Jonathan Groff (Mindhunter) consistently steals every scene he’s in as fiendish yet childish fan favourite King George III; ultimately, however, the show (and the film) belongs to veritable powerhouse Daveed Diggs (Blindspotting, TV’s Snowpiercer) in a spectacular duel role, starting subtly but gaining scene-stealing momentum as French Revolutionary Gilbert du Motier, the Marquis de Lafayette, before EXPLODING onto the stage in the second half as indomitable eventual American President Thomas Jefferson. Not having seen the stage show, I was taken completely by surprise by this, revelling in its revisionist genius and offbeat, quirky hip-hop charm, spellbound by the skilful ease with which is takes the sometimes quite dull historical fact and skews it into something consistently entertaining and absorbing, transported by the catchy earworm musical numbers and thoroughly tickled by the delightfully cheeky sense of humour strung throughout (at least when I wasn’t having my heart broken by moments of raw dramatic power). Altogether it’s a pretty unique cinematic experience I wish I could have actually gotten to see on the big screen, and one I’ve consistently recommended to all my friends, even the ones who don’t usually like musicals. As far as I’m concerned it doesn’t need a proper Les Misérables style screen adaptation – this is about as perfect a presentation as the show could possibly hope for.

5. SPUTNIK – the summer’s horror highlight (despite SERIOUSLY tough competition) is a guaranteed sleeper hit that I almost totally missed, stumbling across the trailer one day on YouTube and being completely bowled over by its potential, prompting me to hunt it down by any means necessary. The feature debut of Russian director Egor Abramenko, this first contact sci-fi chiller is about as far from E.T. as it’s possible to get, sharing some of the same DNA as Carpenter’s The Thing but proudly carving its own path with consummate skill and definitely signalling great things to come from its brand new helmer and relative unknown screenwriters Oleg Malovichko and Andrei Zolotarev. Oksana Akinshina (probably best known in the West for her powerful climactic cameo in The Bourne Supremacy) is the beating heart of the film as neurophysiologist Tatyana Yuryevna Klimova, brought in to aid in the investigation in the Russian wilderness circa 1983 after an orbital research mission goes horribly wrong. One of the cosmonauts dies horribly, while the other, Konstantin (The Duelist’s Pyotr Fyodorov) seems unharmed, but it quickly becomes clear that he’s now playing host to something decidedly extraterrestrial and potentially terrifying, and as Tatyana becomes more deeply embroiled in her assignment she comes to realise that her superiors, particularly mysterious Red Army project leader Colonel Semiradov (The PyraMMMid’s Fyodor Bondarchuk), have far darker plans for Konstantin and his new “friend” than she could ever imagine. This is about as dark, intense and nightmarish as this particular sub-genre gets, a magnificently icky body horror that slowly builds its tension as we’re gradually exposed to the various truths and the awful gravity of the situation slowly reveals itself, punctuated by skilfully executed shocks and some particularly horrifying moments when the evils inflicted by the humans in charge prove to be far worse than anything the alien can do, while the ridiculously talented writers have a field day pulling the rug out from under us again and again, never going for the obvious twist and keeping us guessing right to the devastating ending, while the beautifully crafted digital creature effects are nothing short of astonishing and thoroughly creepy. Akinshina dominates the film with her unbridled grace, vulnerability and integrity, the relationship that develops between Tatyana and Konstantin (Fyodorov delivering a beautifully understated turn belying deep inner turmoil) feeling realistically earned as it goes from tentatively wary to ultimately, tragically bittersweet, while Bondarchuk invests the Colonel with a subtly nuanced air of tarnished authority and restrained brutality that makes him one of my top screen villains for the year. Guaranteed to go down as one of 2020’s great sleeper hits, I can’t speak of this film highly enough – it’s a genuine revelation, an instant classic for whom I’ll sing its praises for the remainder of the year and beyond, and I wish utmost success to all the creative talents involved in the future. The Invisible Man still rules the roost in the year’s horror stakes, but this runs a VERY close second …

4. GREYHOUND – when the cinemas closed back in March, the fate of many of the major summer blockbusters we’d been looking forward to was thrown into terrible doubt. Some were pushed back to more amenable dates in the autumn or winter, others knocked back a whole year to fill summer slots for 2021, but more than a few simply dropped off the radar entirely with the terrible words “postponed until further notice” stamped on them, and I lamented them all, this one in particular. It hung in there longer than some, stubbornly holding onto its June release slot for as long as possible, but eventually it gave up the ghost too … but thanks to Apple TV+, not for long, ultimately releasing less than a month later than intended. Thankfully the final film was worth the fuss, a taut World War II suspense thriller that’s all killer, no filler – set during the infamous Battle of the Atlantic, it portrays the constant life-or-death struggle faced by the Allied warships assigned to escort the transport convoys as they crossed the ocean, defending their charges from German U-boats. Adapted from C.S. Forester’s famous 1955 novel The Good Shepherd by Tom Hanks and directed by Aaron Schneider (Get Low), the narrative focuses on the crew of the escort leader, American destroyer USS Fletcher, codenamed Greyhound, and in particular its captain, Commander Ernest Krause (Hanks), a career sailor serving his first command. As they cross “the Pit”, the most dangerous mid stretch of the journey where they spend days without air-cover, they find themselves shadowed by “the Wolf Pack”, a particularly cunning group of German subs that begin to pick away at the convoy’s stragglers. Faced with daunting odds, a dwindling supply of vital depth-charges and a ruthless, persistent enemy, Krause must make hard choices to bring his ships home safe … jumping into the thick of the action within the first ten minutes and maintaining that tension for the remainder of its trim 90-minute run, this is screen suspense par excellence, a sleek textbook example of how to craft a compelling big screen knuckle-whitener with zero fat and maximum reward, delivering a series of desperate naval scraps packed with hide-and-seek intensity, heart-in-mouth near-misses and fist-in-air cathartic payoffs by the bucket-load. Hanks is subtly magnificent, the calm centre of the narrative storm as a supposed newcomer to this battle arena who could have been BORN for it, bringing to mind the similarly unflappable turn he delivered in Captain Phillips and certainly not suffering by comparison; by and large he’s the focus point, but other crew members do make strong (if sometimes quite brief) impressions, particularly Stephen Graham as Krause’s reliably seasoned XO, Lt. Commander Charlie Cole, The Magnificent Seven’s Manuel Garcia-Rulfo and Just Mercy’s Rob Morgan, while Elisabeth Shue does a lot with a very small part in brief flashbacks as Krause’s fiancée Evelyn. Relentless, powerful, exhilarating and thoroughly unforgettable, this was one of the true action highlights of the summer, and one hell of a war flick. I’m so glad it made the cut for the season …

3. PROJECT POWER – with Marvel and DC pushing their tent-pole titles back into late autumn in the face of COVID, the usual superhero antics we’ve come to expect over the main blockbuster season were pretty thin on the ground, leading us to find our geeky fan thrills elsewhere. Unfortunately, pickings were frustratingly slim – Korean comic book actioner Gundala was entertaining but workmanlike, while Thor AU-take Mortal was underwhelming despite strong direction from Troll Hunter’s André Øvredal, and I’ve already made my feelings clear on the frustration of The New Mutants – thank the Gods, then, for Netflix, once again riding to the rescue with this enjoyably offbeat super-thriller, which takes an intriguing central premise and really runs with it. New designer drug Power has hit the streets of New Orleans, able to give anyone who takes it a superpower for five minutes … the only problem is, until you try it, you won’t know what your own unique talent is – for some, it could mean five minutes of invisibility, or insane levels of super-strength, but other powers can be potentially lethal, the really unlucky buggers just blowing up on the spot. Robin (The Hate U Give’s Dominique Fishback) is a teenage Power-pusher with dreams of becoming a rap star, dealing the pills so she can help her diabetic mum; Frank Shaver (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is one of her customers, an NOPD detective who uses his power of near invulnerability to even the playing field when powered crims cause a disturbance. Their lives are turned upside down when Art (Jamie Foxx) arrives in town – he’s a seriously badass ex-soldier determined to hunt down the source of Power by any means necessary, and he’s not above tearing the Big Easy apart to do it. This is a fun, gleefully infectious rollercoaster that doesn’t take itself too seriously, revelling in the anarchic potential of its premise and crafting some suitably OTT effects-driven chaos brought to pleasingly visceral fruition by its skilfully inventive director, Ariel Schulman (Catfish, Nerve, Viral), while Mattson Tomlin (the screenwriter of next year’s incendiary DCEU headline act The Batman) takes his script in some very interesting directions and poses some fascinating questions about what Power’s TRULY capable of. Gordon-Levitt and Fishback are both brilliant, the latter particularly impressing in what’s sure to be a major breakthrough role for her, and the friendship their characters share is pretty adorable, while Foxx really is a force to be reckoned with, pretty chill even when he’s in deep shit but fully capable of turning into a bona fide killing machine at the flip of a switch, and there’s strong support from Westworld’s Rodrigo Santoro as Biggie, Power’s delightfully oily kingpin, Courtney B. Vance as Frank’s by-the-book superior, Captain Crane, Amy Landecker as Gardner, the morally bankrupt CIA spook responsible for the drug’s production, and Machine Gun Kelly as Newt, a Power dealer whose explosive pyrotechnic “gift” really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Exciting, inventive, frequently amusing and infectiously likeable, this was some of the most uncomplicated “cinematic” fun I had this summer. Not bad for something which I’m sure was originally destined to become one of the season’s B-list features …

2. THE OLD GUARD – Netflix’s undisputable TOP OFFERING of the summer came damn close to bagging the whole season, and I can’t help thinking that even if some of the stiffer competition had still been present it may well have still finished this high. Gina Prince-Blythewood (Love & Basketball, the Secret Life of Bees) directs comics legend Greg Rucka’s adaptation of his own popular title with uncanny skill and laser-focused visual flair considering there’s nothing on her previous CV to suggest she’d be THIS good at mounting a stomping good ultraviolent action thriller, ushering in this thoroughly engrossing tale of four ancient, invulnerable immortal warriors – Andy AKA Andromache of Scythia (Charlize Theron), Booker AKA Sebastian de Livre (Matthias Schoenaerts), Joe AKA Yusuf Al-Kaysani (Wolf’s Marwan Kenzari) and Nicky AKA Niccolo di Ginova (Trust’s Luca Marinelli) – who’ve been around forever, hiring out their services as mercenaries for righteous causes while jealously guarding their identities for fear of horrific experimentation and exploitation should their true natures ever be discovered. Their anonymity is threatened, however, when they’re uncovered by former CIA operative James Copley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), working for the decidedly dodgy pharmaceutical conglomerate run by sociopathic billionaire Steven Merrick (Harry Melling, formerly Dudley in the Harry Potter movies), who want to capture these immortals so they can patent whatever it is that makes them keep on ticking … just as a fifth immortal, US Marine Nile Freeman (If Beale Street Could Talk’s KiKi Layne), awakens after being “killed” on deployment in Afghanistan. The supporting players are excellent, particularly Ejiofor, smart and driven but ultimately principled and deeply conflicted about what he’s doing, even if he does have the best of intentions, and Melling, the kind of loathsome, reptilian scumbag you just love to hate, but the film REALLY DOES belong to the Old Guard themselves – Schoenaerts is a master brooder, spot-on casting as the group’s relative newcomer, only immortal since the Napoleonic Wars but clearly one seriously old soul who’s already VERY tired of the lifestyle, while Joe and Nicky (who met on opposing sides of the Crusades) are simply ADORABLE, an unapologetically matter-of-fact gay couple who are sweet, sassy and incredibly kind, the absolute emotional heart of the film; it’s the ladies, however, that are most memorable here. Layne is exceptional, investing Nile with a steely intensity that puts her in good stead as her new existence threatens to overwhelm her and MORE THAN qualified to bust heads alongside her elders … but it’s ancient Greek warrior Andy who steals the film, Theron building on the astounding work she did in Atomic Blonde to prove, once and for all, that there’s no woman on Earth who looks better kicking arse than her (as Booker puts it, “that woman has forgotten more ways to kill than entire armies will ever learn”); in her hands, Andy truly is a goddess of death, tough as tungsten alloy and unflappable even in the face of hell itself, but underneath it all she hides a heart as big as any of her friends’. They’re an impossibly lovable bunch and you feel you could follow them on another TEN adventures like this one, which is just as well, because Prince-Blythewood and Rucka certainly put them through their paces here – the drama is high (but frequently laced with a gentle, knowing sense of humour, particularly whenever Joe and Nicky are onscreen), as are the stakes, and the frequent action sequences are top-notch, executed with rare skill and bone-crunching zest, but also ALWAYS in service to the story. Altogether this is an astounding film, a genuine victory for its makers and, it seems, for Netflix themselves – it’s become one of the platform’s biggest hits to date, earning well-deserved critical acclaim and great respect and genuine geek love from the fanbase at large. After this, a sequel is not only inevitable, it’s ESSENTIAL …

1. TENET – granted, the streaming platforms (particularly Netflix and Amazon) certainly did save our cinematic summer, but I’m still IMMEASURABLY glad that the season’s ultimate top-spot winner was one I got to experience on THE BIG SCREEN. You gotta hand it to Christopher Nolan, he sure hung in there, stubbornly determined that his latest cinematic masterpiece WOULD be released in cinemas in the summer (albeit ultimately landing JUST inside the line in the final week of August), and it was worth all the fuss because, for me, this was THE PERFECT MOVIE for me to get return to cinemas with. I mean, okay, in the end it WASN’T the FIRST new movie I saw after the reopening, that honour went to Unhinged, but THIS was my first real Saturday night out big screen EXPERIENCE since March. Needless to say, Nolan didn’t disappoint this time any more than he has on any of his consistently spectacular previous releases, delivering another twisted, mind-boggling headfuck of a full-blooded experiential sensory overload that comes perilously close to toppling his long-standing auteur-peak, Inception (itself second only by fractions to The Dark Knight as far as I’m concerned). To say much at all about the plot would give away major spoilers – personally I’d recommend just going in as cold as possible, indeed you really should just stop reading this right now and just GO SEE IT. Still with us? Okay … the VERY abridged version is that it’s about a secret war being waged between the present and the future by people capable of “inverting” time in substances, objects, people, whatever, into which the Protagonist (BlacKkKlansman’s John David Washington), an unnamed CIA agent, has been dispatched in order to prevent a potential coming apocalypse. Washington is once again on top form, crafting a robust and compelling morally complex heroic lead who’s just as comfortable negotiating the minefields of black market intrigue as he is breaking into places or dispatching heavies, Kenneth Branagh delivers one of his most interesting and memorable performances in years as brutal Russian oligarch Andrei Sator, a genuinely nasty piece of work who may be the year’s very best screen villain, Elizabeth Debicki (The Night Manager, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Widows) brings strength, poise and wounded integrity to the role of Sator’s estranged wife, Kat, and Aaron Taylor-Johnson gets to use his own accent for once as tough-as-nails British Intelligence officer Ives, while there are brief but consistently notable supporting turns and cameos from Martin Donovan, Yesterday’s HImesh Patel, Dirk Gently’s Fiona Dourif and, of course, Nolan’s good luck charm, Michael Caine. The cast’s biggest surprise, however, is Robert Pattinson, truly a revelation in what has to be, HANDS DOWN, his best role to date, Neil, the Protagonist’s mysterious handler – he’s by turns cheeky, slick, duplicitous and thoroughly badass, delivering an enjoyably multi-layered, chameleonic performance which proves what I’ve long maintained, that the former Twilight star is actually a fucking amazing actor, and on the basis of this, even without that amazing new teaser trailer making the rounds, I think the debate about whether or not he’s the right choice for the new Batman is now academic. As we’ve come to expect from Nolan, this is a TRUE tour-de-force experience, a visual masterpiece and an endlessly engrossing head-scratcher, Nolan’s screenplay bringing in some seriously big ideas and throwing us some major narrative knots and loopholes, constantly wrong-footing the viewer while also setting up truly revelatory payoffs from seemingly low-key, unimportant beginnings – this is a film you need to be awake and attentive for or you could miss something pretty vital. The action sequences are, as ever, second to none, some of the year’s very best set-pieces coming thick and fast and executed with some of the most accomplished skill in the business, while Nolan-regular cinematographer Hoyte van Hoytema (Interstellar and Dunkirk, as well as the heady likes of Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, SPECTRE and Ad Astra) once again shows he’s one of the best camera-wizards in the business today by delivering some truly mesmerising visuals. Notably, Nolan’s other regular collaborator, composer Hans Zimmer, is absent here (although he has good reason, currently working on his dream project, the fast-approaching screen adaptation of Dune), but Ludwig Göransson (best known for his regular collaborations with Ryan Coogler on the likes of Fruitvale Station, Creed and Black Panther, as well as truly awesome work on The Mandalorian) makes for a fine replacement, crafting an intriguingly internalised, post-modern musical landscape that thrums and pulses in time with the story and emotions of the characters rather than the action itself. Interestingly it’s on the subject of sound that some of the film’s rare detractions have been levelled, and I can see some of the points – the soundtrack mix is an all-encompassing thing, and there are times when the dialogue can be overwhelmed, but in Nolan’s defence as a film this is a heady, immersive experience, something you really need to concentrate on, so these potential flaws are easily forgiven. As a piece of filmmaking art, this is another flawless wonder from one of the true masters of the craft working in cinema today, but it’s art with palpable substance, a rewarding whole that really HAS TO BE experienced on the big screen. So put your snobbery at post-lockdown restrictions aside for the moment and get yourself down to your nearest cinema so you can experience it for yourself. You won’t be disappointed. Right now, this is my movie of the year, and with only one possible exception, I really don’t see that changing …

#movies 2020 #body cam #body cam (2020)#blood quantum #blood quantum movie #palm springs #palm springs movie #the last days of american crime #hamilton #hamilton movie #sputnik #sputnik movie #greyhound #greyhound movie #project power #the old guard #tenet #tenet movie #awesome sauce

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indestinatus · 5 years ago

Text

Something Blue (part 4/15)

Please read it in AO3, this fic has soundtracks.

Summary: Now that Ziva is safe and can return to her family… Tony doesn’t waste any time. She’ll need to have something blue to go along with a white wedding gown.

“Have we died and reached paradise or am I dreaming?” asked Nick looking up to the clear blue sky.

The team stood assembled at the bridge that connected the sea to the island, every single one of them laughing after dancing non-stop to the songs from the boat. Their tongues tasted of bubbly champagne and citric fruit, the wind playing with their hair and the hats that scaped occasionally from their heads. The early afternoon sun was reflected on the slow waves of the pier, seagulls a constant subject of the light blue sky, following the passengers from the boat to the coconut trees. White painted every surface, from the large circular domes to the infinite steep stairs of restaurants and balconies, mixed between wide, ancient stone walls separating the many houses.

Bright yellow flowers colored the wooden stakes of the bridge, intertwined with olive branches and other herbs. At the end of it, a small wooden sign was placed on the sand, an arrow pointing northeast to one side of the beach, next to a message in elegant handwriting.

Welcome to our beginning. Please, have lots of fun. - love, T and Z.

Little bare feet came running towards the group, raising sand on its way as the summer air filled with giggles.

She clung to Gibbs’ leg and looked up, a few strands of hair coming loose from her braid which was swinging in the wind. She wore a little white dress with a floral pattern. A big gap-toothed smile framed her face as he raised her to his arms, receiving a sweet kiss on the cheek on return.

“Hey, Tali,” he said softly as the other members of the team greeted her as well, making her shy for a moment when she hid her face on the crook of his neck, “where’s your father?”

“On your six, boss,” a familiar voice greeted them.

Gibbs had never seen Tony look so happy. He was tanned, small freckles painting his cheekbones and a wide grin displayed on his lips. Like his daughter, he was also barefoot, a Hawaiian shirt complimenting his look along with black sunglasses which he put on his front pocket.

“Finally you’ve arrived, I was starting to doubt if my specialist on weddings would come to support my own,” he added with a smile, squeezing Gibbs’ shoulder, “I promise it’ll only be one though, I don’t have your kind of vigor, boss.”

He received a head slap in return.

“Nothing changed, uh?”

“It never will, DiNozzo.”

Gibbs put Tali down for a moment to give a proper hug on his former agent, patting his back firmly.

“You’ve done well, son,” he whispered in his ear.

“Don’t you dare me make emotional right now, I have a feeling my eyes will sweat a lot during the weekend,” Tony replied with a smile.

They let go and Tony surveyed the team, clasping his hands together.

“Now to presentations,” he continued, “my fondest, warmest, kindest welcomes, everyone, it is a pleasure to have you here. I see old faces and new faces,” he glanced at Torres and Kasie and smiled, “and me and Tali here are glad that you came all the way from DC to witness this miracle. And where is the Rapunzel of the story? Well, funny you should ask, she’s currently going mad about the color of the table cloths and if we should put lights on or off in a wedding set at sundown. Who knew crazy Israeli ninja was so fond of this kind of stuff?”

“We all knew, Tony,” said Palmer.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s why I’m marrying her,” he replied with a warm smirk, “so… she told me she’d meet you up the hill, where you’ll be staying, with lots of food and drinks as an apology. Go easy on her, she still has a wedding to attend tomorrow and I’m quite scared she’ll go entirely Daenerys before it happens. Then I’ll have to marry McGroom and fulfill his lifetime secret dream.”

“Oh, give me a break, will you,” McGee huffed a laugh, his lips turning upwards instantly.

“You’ll never have a break from me, McDad. Never. I will hunt you when we both become ghosts, chasing you around the cemetery as I scream McBoooo,” he lifted Tali in the air, tickling her sides before putting her back down on the ground.

“How long have you been holding this joke?”

“Well, it’s been a while since I’ve seen you, Probie, now that you’re a dad of these little monsters, you’ve been quite busy, uh?” he winked to Delilah, “two of them running around the house-”

“Just you wait,” McGee replied with a grin.

“How indiscreet, McGoo, what are you-”

Abby coughed loudly, gesturing to the wooden sign with wide eyes.

“Oh, let’s get out of the sun immediately,” said Tony gratefully, “Ziva made a whole schedule we have to follow and, to be fair, it’s quite good. She should think about working with that instead of being a trained assassin.”

“Ladies, with me!” exclaimed Abby, a hand raised in the air, “I’ll be your greek tour guide for the weekend! Yaaay! We’ll go up the hill by van so we can appreciate our surroundings,” she winked to Delilah, who nodded thankfully from her wheelchair, “I’ll be the best guide there is, you’re lucky you didn’t end up with Tony.”

“Hey!” Tony complained with a smile, “no one knows how to have fun better than I do. Okay, guys and little monsters, with me! Apparently, Tali has everything already under control.”

“Mermaids!” was all Tali said, running towards Victoria next to Jimmy.

The group dispersed, going to different directions. Tony approached Ellie, who was standing next to the one of the faces he didn’t know. The guy wore a white tank top and a Panama hat, his arms sculped and a knowing smile on his lips.

“You must be the wuss,” said Tony holding his hand out.

“News fly,” Nick faltered for a moment and glanced at Ellie, cheeks a bit red.

“Wuss…?” she asked confused.

“Ziva told me you let her win a fight,” Tony intercepted with a knowing look at Bishop, “I’m impressed, rumors are she killed Houdini.”

“Houdini? As in the magician?” asked Ellie.

“She doesn’t recall all the names, she said,” answered Tony with a smile, twinkling eyes directed to Torres, “if you excuse us gentlemen, agent Bishop,” he kissed her hand, “we got to get to some donkeys.”

“DONKEYS?” asked Nick startled, a laugh escaping his lips.

“A big greek wedding, my friend, donkeys are a must.”

Tony wrapped an arm around the man’s shoulders, directing him towards the right path.

“Just so you know,” he muttered in a tone only Nick could hear, “I made my own personal mission to make you tell her how you feel by the end of this weekend.”

Nick glanced to Tony, who was casting him a mischievous smile.

“Then where’s the alcohol, bro?”

“I like you already.”

°°°

“One… two… three!” Tali placed her little legs on top of Tony’s shoulders, his hands firmly gripping her ankles from below, “push the button,” he said as he held his index finger high for Tali.

She pushed it slightly with her finger, just as her father yelled “HERE WE GO!” and started to swing his body from side to side. A moment later, a loud splash could be heard across the waves, the white seafoam coloring the crystal blue water. Tony emerged with Tali wrapped around his torso, happy giggles echoing all around on a sunny afternoon.

“Uncle Tim, Uncle Tim!” exclaimed Victoria, wearing bright pink arm floats and a little floral cap, as she pointed at something underwater, “there, I can see it!”

“Where?” he looked at the place she was showing, Morgan in his arms with wet pigtails, “oh, I see it. You’ve found a big one, good job!”

He let his daughter float at the slow waves as he dived down to grab something at the bottom of the ocean.

“Ooooh,” said Victoria out loud, hands on her cheeks, “can I touch it?”

“Yes, just do it slowly, it’s a little gooey,” said McGee as he held the shining orange starfish at the girls’ direction.

Vitoria’s little finger touched it softly, but she backed away as soon as she got to know its texture.

“No, no, I don’t wanna touch it,” said Morgan as she gripped her father’s arm hard.

“It’s okay, Morgan, let’s just put it back where it belongs then, uh?”

He dived again to put the starfish at the sand bottom and surfaced a moment later, Victoria already swimming to another location to search for a new sea creature.

“First you turn your hands into a vessel, like this,” Jimmy laid one hand atop of each other, “close it tight, like you’re gonna catch water, and then blow steady between your knuckles, like this.”

A loud high pitch whistle reverberated across the rocks they were sitting when Jimmy blew inside his hand, similar to the sound of a clear flute.

“Whoah, do it again!” exclaimed Johnny, trying to mimic his hands.

“Just like the Cherokee Indians,” Jimmy repeated the whistle, now changing the notes and creating a soft melodic pattern.

The coconut trees swayed with the wind, the rays of sunshine kissing their skin and marking their cheeks with soft freckles as it descended on the horizon. Minutes stretched into hours, and time turned fake in the children’s hands. It seemed infinite. The afternoon could go on forever.

It was paradise.

A loud whistle blew from the sand, revealing Senior calling the group with an energetic wave. He walked towards Gibbs, who was sitting in the shade carving up something out of a piece of wood.

“Can’t they stay like this forever?” asked Senior, a sad note in his voice.

“No,” Gibbs replied, looking to the horizon, eyes hard and sad, “no, they cannot.”

The children came running towards the plates of strawberries and pineapple, screaming with delight and raising clouds of sand in their wake. They threw themselves on the colorful pillows scattered on the sand floor, wet bodies splashing drops of seawater all around them. Their fathers came close behind, Tony shaking his body like a wet dog making everybody laugh.

“Palmer, can I talk to you for a sec?” he asked softly, after drying Tali’s wet hair with a towel.

“Yeah, of course,” Jimmy passed the coconut to McGee and got up, going with Tony towards the sea again.

Once their feet touched the waves, Tony turned to him, arms crossed and face furrowed in concern.

“Did you have the chance to bring it? I know I shouldn’t ask you that, it’s just, I think she would-”

Jimmy opened up a smile.

“What are you talking about? Of course I did, they don’t call me a man of honor for nothing,” he replied, squeezing Tony’s shoulders slightly, “don’t worry, my friend, everything’s gonna be fine. Great, even, you’ll see.”

“I’m not worried.”

Tony raised his clear eyes to Palmer, but the harsh laugh that escaped his lips revealed otherwise. The men laughed together, patting each other in the back and walking towards the children.

“Have you ever been closer to paradise than this place?” asked Torres, sitting on the slackline he had just proudly crossed, with sunkissed skin and eyes facing where the sky met the sea.

“Did you know the definition of ‘paradise’ ultimately comes from an Iranian word that the Greeks modified into paradeisos, meaning ‘enclosed park’,” answered Ducky, a bottle of cold water in his hand, “in Hellenistic Greek, “paradeisos” was also used in the Septuagint - an early Greek translation of Jewish scriptures - in reference to the Garden of Eden. So we are staying where the word came from.“

"I’m gonna take that as a no,” Nick replied laughing.

“I’ve arrived a little bit later than I’ve expected and I didn’t have the chance to see young Eleanor,” Ducky sent an amused look to Torres, “is she well?”

“You too, Ducky? Can’t no one give me a break?”

“Oh, I’m only asking, Nicholas, you seemed rather close,” but Ducky’s eyes were not so clueless.

“I’m sorry, yeah, yeah, she’s great,” Nick replied shrugging.

Ducky let out a charming laugh, looking up to the clear sky, “I think this is the worst-case scenario for someone to give you a break, Nick. We are at the wedding of another office couple, after all.”

“Another…?”

Nick pointed his index finger to Ducky and then put it on his lips, asking for silence, “please don’t go spreading out this idea to the others, Doctor Mallard.”

He stood up and with a surfboard under his arm, Nick raced towards the ocean. The wind was perfect for surfing at the calm waves.

Ducky reclined himself on his sun lounger, taking a sip of his cold water, “oh, I think they already know, kid,” he laughed to the sky.

°°°

“To your left. No, your other left. Yeah, up a little bit. A little bit more-”

A loud crash sounded when the glass jar shattered at the tiles, flowers and candles scattering everywhere. Ziva cursed in a foreign language, already bending down to the clean the mess on the floor.

“I’m sorry, Ziv,” said a younger cousin of her, who came along with her family from Tel Aviv to eat and dance for free, as well as try to help her with the numerous decorations. She was hanging the lights up in the olive trees, but there were so many of them to coordinate with the flowers and pieces of cloth, even Ziva was a bit confused with where to put them.

“It’s okay, Sorsha, I’ll handle it later,” she replied with a smile to the young girl standing up at the ladder, a guilty expression on her face.

“We still have to set the tables and wrap the gifts and talk to the band,” proceeded Ziva exasperated, sighing tiredly with the back of her hand rubbing her forehead.

“And test the lights,” added Sorsha, who now ticked things out of a small paper list, “and see if the cake turned out okay.”

“That Odette is taking care of, you can cross it out.”

“And welcome the guests.”

Ziva stopped where she stood and turned around as soon as she recognized that voice.

“Breena,” Ziva opened a wide grin to her old friend, who came running to hug her tightly, “I’m so glad you’re all here!”

Ziva greeted every one of them with a kiss on the cheek, bending down to talk to Delilah.

“You must be the one who finally stole Tim’s lion heart,” she said with a knowing glance.

“I know, I’m still shocked from time to time,” Delilah replied with a smile.

Ziva gave her a thankful nod, and no words were needed.

“Okay. Food. You must be starving,” she came back to her worried self, tying her hair into a knot, “I just need to check a few things.”

“Hey, are you okay?” asked Jack, her professional voice taking over, “Ziva, I think you need to relax for a bit. You’re the bride, remember? How can we help?”

“Take her out of here,” declared Odette, who was guiding two people with a large flower vase nearby, hands on her hips and a meaningful smile at Ellie, “or I will myself prohibit her getting any closer.”

“I’m- I’m sorry. I think I bit more than I can screw,” said Ziva, trying to recompose herself.

“What…?” asked Kasie, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“We called it Zivaisms,” answered Abby, grabbing Ziva’s arm and leading her towards the accommodations, not caring about any response, “when Tony is not around to correct her, we just ignore the weird and move on.”

“I tend to do a lot of ignoring the weird and moving on down at that lab,” remarked Kasie.

Abby looked at her with a wide grin, then started to jump up and down, not being able to contain her excitement. She let go of Ziva to run towards Kasie and hug her tightly, while the bride just burst out laughing with the scene, finally letting herself relax.

“We have so much to talk about,” said Abby, arm wrapped around Kasie’s shoulders, “what kind of music you play there now?”

“Uh-”

“It doesn’t matter, I’m so excited there’s finally someone who understands. YAAAY!”

They walked together until they arrived at the lodgings, stationed just above the sea, the white stone balconies disappearing among the many similar others along the coast. The air smelled of sea salt, dried herbs, and the feeling of freedom of a new vacation about to start. Ziva entered the bridal room, making everyone cheer when she showed the sign of “Future Mrs.” placed at her door. A smooth wooden table filled with plates of fruit, various types of seeds and pastries greeted them, along with bottles of cold champagne and rosé wine. Across the hall, a white bed was stationed in front of a large floor to ceiling open window, the big beige curtains flying with the ocean wind.

The view was magnificent.

It was close to the sea so it was possible to discern the silhouettes of the villagers, but far enough to have some privacy. The sound of the waves could be heard all over the room as they hit the cliffs, the constant splashing a calming tune. A small dressing table was placed near the windows, seashells covering the whole surface around the mirror.

Only three objects were set on top of it.

A photograph of Rivka and Eli David, arms wrapped around each other when they were incredibly young, the Jordan mountaintops behind them. Its frame was made of pearls.

A photograph of Ziva holding her sister Tali’s hand, her brother Ari at her other side, all laughing, their bicycles laid on the ground. Its frame was made of buttons.

And a photograph of a man pointing to the camera, his eyes looking towards a little girl whose face was dirty with the chocolate ice cream she held in her hands. Tali was smiling, her baby teeth appearing through her mouth in a wide grin, dark brown eyes twinkling. Tony was also beaming, as if it was the first time he made her truly laugh.

That one she didn’t frame on purpose, the paper almost damaged with time and constant folding to pocket size. It was the most precious to her.

“Whoah, that’s a hell of a view,” said Kasie, eyebrows raised and mouth opened in an oval shape.

“Perfect, wouldn’t you say?” Abby replied, sending Ziva a naughty grin and wiggling her brows.

“Abby,” Ziva huffed a nervous laugh, her cheeks reddening in a rare moment, “this isn’t where we are going to stay for the honeymoon.”

“Why not?! It’s the perfect place, with a great view of the stars, and the sea-”

“Abby,” Ziva stopped her, “he did not want to tell me about it.”

Every woman looked at Ziva, all casting disbelieving glances at each other.

“Really?” asked Jack, “is he that good?”

Ziva smiled shyly, looking down to her feet.

“Yeah,” she answered, “yeah, he is.”

Giggles filled her room, and for the first time in her life, Ziva David was grateful to have such a great female company.

“I’m so glad that you’re here, ladies. I was getting suffocated with all the planning and the last minute decorations. At least Tony is taking care of Tali, or else she would’ve wanted to opine on everything,” she smiled with the thought.

“So, Ziva, tell us the news! How did Tony propose?” asked Ellie, sitting down at a nearby chair after Abby popped open a bottle of champagne, “we didn’t hear anything about you until the invitations arrived.”

“That… that’s a very long and funny story, but we have something more important to discuss first.”

Ziva grabbed a grape and threw it in her mouth, chewing slowly while studying Ellie, who seemed a bit nervous with the sudden turn in the conversation.

“Eleanor, will I need to give you the bouquet directly or are you already aware that Nicholas is fond of you?”

Ellie froze. Her cheeks blushed until the redness reached her ears, and she huffed a laugh while putting a loose strand of her hair behind her ear.

“What? No. Nick? Puff, no way. He’s… he’s just… he’s my partner. We’re coworkers, nothing will happen.”

Everyone glanced at her with a bemused look.

“You do realize what we’re doing here this weekend, don’t you, Ellie?” asked Sloane carefully, placing her hand on top of Bishop’s.

“A wedding?” Abby giggled, “Of… coworkers…?” she added.

Ellie opened up a shy smile when the women started to shake her shoulders and cheer, her cheeks turning even redder than she thought it was possible.

“Don’t worry, uh?” Ziva cast her an honest look, “just have fun and I promise you, time will tell.”

°°°

“HEY TATER TOTS,” called Nick from the water, four kids giggling behind him on the low waves, “HEY, BISHOP!”

Ellie startled where she was lying down on a sun lounger, back facing the sun and wearing a high waisted bikini set. The warmth made her head dizzy with sleep, and she was so tired from the long journey, she didn’t even notice when the back massage Ziva arranged for her ended and when she started to only sunbathe.

“WHAT DO YOU WANT, BRUSSELS SPROUTS?”

“I have a dare for you.”

She startled once again when she realized he was standing just next to her, drops of water wetting her shoulder when he bent down to whisper in her ear.

“What… what dare?” she turned around carefully, hands shading the sun from her eyes as her skin started to tingle with the sight of Nick’s silhouette against the sun.

“I dare you to do a better handstand than those kids.”

“What?” That was unexpected.

“The one with the higher score is Tali. For now. Johnny said that it was because she was older, so I told him you’re older than any of them and doesn’t know how to do a proper handstand.”

Ellie snorted a derisive laugh, taking Nick’s hand to help her stand up, “do you think Eleanor Bishop doesn’t know how to do the most simple summer thing such as a handstand?”

“You’re talking in third person, creep,” he repeated her words from hours before, racing with her towards the kids. Sounds of constant laughter and waves crashing echoed all around.

Abby had taken every one to show a little cave she found with clear hot springs inside, near the cliffs on the other side of the beach. Gibbs and Jack had gone to the opposite direction, walking in the sand until they weren’t visible anymore around the bend.

Meanwhile, Ziva had arranged back massages for her and Ellie to enjoy the little spare time she had before the big event.

She now was lying down at a recliner chair, knots on her back coming undone by the amazing hands of the venue massagist. Her maroon bikini top was untied and she rested at the shade, palm trees swaying with the wind next to her. Her mouth tasted of cold sparkling wine, the sensation of bubbles exploding on her tongue still lingering. All she could hear was the wind, the birds and the sea nearby.

“Hmmm,” she moaned as the massagist touched a particularly painful spot. Her vertebrae cracked carefully under his fingers and the muscles started to slowly relax.

It was heaven.

“Hmmm, just like that, yeah.”

“Miss?” asked the young massagist in a polite tone.

“Hmmm…?” was all she could muster.

Ziva heard the loud sound of children laughing far away, followed by one “I win!” muffled by the powerful wind. She didn’t have a clue what that might be, but she smiled softly with the thought.

The massagist’s hands left her back from a moment, the wind caressing her skin and making her shiver.

“Uhh,” he said, a nervous note distinguishable in his voice, “are you the one getting married, miss?”

His hands returned, massaging her shoulders and the back of her neck as she moaned out loud with the sensation. She was alone and didn’t care about anything or anyone, to be honest. Tony was showing the surroundings to the guests with Abby and Tali was playing in the sand with the other kids. This was her moment, and hers alone.

“Yes, yes I am.”

“And… and who is the groom?” the young man asked politely, voice now steadier once she stopped with the moaning.

“He…” Ziva did it again just to feel him stiffen, biting her lower lip as a loud sound escaped her throat, “his name is Tony. Tall guy. Talks a lot.”

This is still too easy.

It was few the moments in her life Ziva David had truly felt like a woman, only when her job demanded and when her guilty desire asked her to. Now, she had a little girl who asked her about princess’ stories and glittery clothes, a good man at her side whose eyes always landed on her filled with need and a wedding party about to happen.

With a white gown and something blue included.

It all seemed like a dream, after years running away and hiding from Sahar, she was now in this beautiful place with all her family to cherish her wedding.

The girl who ran all her life had finally found herself.

“Is he… is he here?” asked the massagist, hands trailing down her lower back with care.

“Yes, he is. Well, not now, but you know, I do hope he is at the wedding, at least.”

“Of course.”

He changed the position of his hands to press down at her calves and Ziva purred in delight. She felt him bending down to massage the back of her knee, so she moaned once again just to play with him, her sassiness on overdrive.

“Is he, you know, strong? Knows how to fight?”

Ziva’s mind filled with images of Tony with shoulder holsters and sweaty skin, and she had to bite her lip again to prevent her from muttering anything too inappropriate. Gosh, the waiting for this honeymoon would make her explode with greed until there.

“Yeah, I’m afraid he’s pretty good at it.”

The massagist hands trailed the back of her thigh, making a skip from her hips to her lower back again.

“Is he… good looking?”

“Oh,” she smiled with the sight of him in formal attire tomorrow, “oh yeah-”

Her voice abandoned her as she felt the young man bending down atop of her and doing a fast lick at the shell of her ear.

“HEY, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?”

She quickly grasped her bikini top to turn around and stand up, wanting to punch him right away, but his body pressed her down at the chair, laying on top of her back.

He was too heavy, and for a second she couldn’t move from the position she was lying down.

She had to think fast.

She had to found a quick way out of here.

“I could ask you the same thing, Dah-veed.”

Tony’s raspy voice caressed the back of her ear just as he came closer to place a lingering kiss on the crook of her neck.

“You have no self-respect moaning like that, do you?” he grabbed her hair to position her neck how he liked, placing wet kisses from her shoulder to her earlobe, “you have no respect for the groom also, uh? You do know he’s obeying your wishes to wait until the honeymoon, don’t you?”

He kissed her neck, again and again, and again, making her dizzy and hot and sweaty. Her skin began to prickle wherever he touched and she could feel a tingling sensation starting to grow strong at the base of her belly.

“You do know,” another kiss, “that you’re driving him crazy,” another kiss, “with your bikini like that?”

She started to shiver and couldn’t take it anymore as one of his hands trailed down to grab her firmly at the waist.

“Tony, I-” a loud moan escaped her lips as he pressed his whole body hard on her back.

“He can’t. Wait. For tomorrow. Sweetcheeks,” he said slowly, the syllables leaving his lips just as he placed kiss after kiss on her neck, again and again, making her want to scream, her heart threatening to explode.

Tony planted a wet smooch on her ear, making a loud 'pop’ as he moved away, letting her turn around. An amused smirk danced on his lips as his green eyes gave an appreciate gaze down her body, waiting for her as she tied her bikini. The young massagist was nowhere to be found.

“It was you all along?”

He opened up a boyish smile, eyes growing dark as his gaze lingered on her lips a moment too long.

“Did you really think a massage that good could be done by a shaky little guy in training?”

Ziva chuckled, licking her lips as she watched Tony’s eyes carefully trace her tongue with hard focus.

“How much did you give him to ask that stuff?”

“Your habilities are faltering, Israeli, once upon a time you could sense me in your sleep just by my marvelous natural musk,” his eyes darted from her lips to her chocolate eyes, the color almost invisible as it became two completely black orbs.

The air between them was filled with electricity, the tension almost unbearable with Ziva licking her lips and Tony tracing her tongue with his eyes.

“Just kiss me already, will you?”

She opened up her mouth to welcome him, his wet tongue crashing into hers with obvious need, smooth and tasting of cold tequila. He moved closer to her, wrapping his arm around her waist, the other lifting to her hair as he intensified the kiss.

Ziva couldn’t think straight, she felt like she had drunk at least a whole bottle of wine, mind blank with all the senses taking over her. The warmth in her belly was spreading across her body, through her veins, and, judging by the way he was groaning into her mouth, she guessed he felt the same.

They were sweating as the lust and desire for each other scrambled on the surface and the body heat between them could cause a fire. It seemed that neither of them wanted to stop the kiss.

But it was necessary to inhale, so Tony drank in her lips for one last long moment and then released them with a soft moan. He opened his eyes and licked his lips, tasting her on them as he looked at him and saw the effect of the kiss. She banged her head once lightly against the chair, feeling completely dumbfounded and, with closed eyes, took a deep breath.

“Why did we wait so long again?” Ziva asked, voice quavering and raspy.

“I ask that myself every day,” Tony answered with a wide smile, “so do you think, HEY-”

A pair of steady hands gripped him at his shoulders and lifted him from the chair, just as another held his ankles and he started to be carried away from her.

“Not now, pal,” said Nick, holding his ankles and moving towards the other side of the beach, “you got somewhere else to be.”

"No, no, no, guys, put me down."

“A bachelor party, I think,” added Jimmy from behind, hands under Tony’s arms.

"PUT ME DOWN," exclaimed Tony, tossing in his friends' arms.

“For the one and only Anthony DiNozzo,” said McGee, winking at Ziva as she chuckled, “YOU CAN HAVE HER TOMORROW,” Tim put his hands in a shell shape, his voice echoing across the beach.

“SHE’S MINE EVERY DAY,” Tony yelled back, trying to turn his head towards Ziva but the guys didn’t let him.

“Is he drunk?” she asked, crossing her arms and eyes twinkling.

“No, he’s not,” replied McGee, a knowing smirk on his lips as he nodded towards Tony, “I think he’s just in love.”

#ncis #tiva #ellick #slibbs #tiva fanfiction #ellick fanfiction #ncis fanfiction #something blue fic #my fics #PLEASE READ IT ON AO3!!!#there is music there #very beach vibes #dads and their kids #then it gets a little hotter whoof #and I can't wait to write the next chapter #it's called 'the bachelor'

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avani008 · 4 years ago

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Dear Yuletide Author 2020!

Here are some things I think are rad: snark. friendships. sneaky twisty endings. stories with bite. characters with personalities. stories that make their writers happy. mythology. humor. stories that dig into and expand on the canon, whether that’s backstory or minor characters or worldbuilding. brown paper packages tied up with string.

Stuff I’m not so keen on: rape, incest, mentions of RL pandemics/quarantines? more into het and femslash than slash.

(Fandoms: Devil’s Cub, Jodhaa-Akbar, Mystic Pop-Up Bar)

Fandom 1: Devil’s Cub

Characters Requested: Mary Challoner, Dominic Alastair

Where to Find Source Material: your local library or bookstore!

Problematic as this book is, I read it at an impressionable age, and so can’t help but have a reluctant soft spot Mary/Dominic—but mostly Mary Challoner and the wit and sparkle of Heyer’s prose. Not to mention Mary’s snark and competence, and Dominic’s grouchiness paired with his utter adoration of Mary, or everything about the utter farce that leads up to the climax in Dijon, or—like pretty much every reader of this book ever— that one scene where Mary shoots him. I have been lucky enough to get an amazing fic for this fandom for several years, but greedily I want more--and my amazing writer was kind enough to encourage me to prompt again, especially for that last racebending prompt. Consider:

* Dominic and Mary meeting the first few times, Sophia included with Mary (I’m sure) crankily falling for him while Dominic remains oblivious (or does he?)!

*A tropey AU (or multiple in one fic), whether social media/fandom-based, daemon AU, or any other fusions you enjoy!

* Finally, this is completely optional, but I’ve had this prompt rattling around my brain since I created this graphic—I would love a racebent version of Mary and Vidal, whether that means they’re Indian immigrants who’ve settled in Victorian Britain, or transplanted into the intrigues of the Mughal court, or whether involvement in the Quit India movement, or lack thereof, is an additional tension in their relationship!

Fandom 2: Jodhaa-Akbar

Characters Requested: Hamida Banu Begum, Maham Anga

Where to find source: Netflix

First off, I adore the movie’s themes of adaptation and acceptance, as well as the way it strategically incorporates Mughal history! I also love the slow burn between Jodhaa and Jalal, and their cautious, ever-changing interactions with one another. That said, my prompts, oddly enough, aren’t about either of them! Instead, they’re about Jalal’s two moms, pre-canon.

*To start with, I love Hamida and if you want to focus in on her early life and leave Maham Anga out, you are welcome to! All you need to know if the juicy details can be found link text“>on Wikipedia and for all the following prompts, you are welcome to only extrapolate from movie canon about Hamida’s past! I hasten to add, if research isn’t your thing, you certainly shouldn’t feel obliged to do it! But assuming we at least assume that given her silence regarding her husband, it’s clear Hamida wasn’t too keen on Humayan for a variety of reasons, but what might have Hindal been like in this universe? Her biting wit as recorded towards her suitor never fails to amuse me, and other examples of it towards others would be grand. Jalal and/or Jodhaa interacting with or discovering Hamida’s past could be interesting too!

*Incorporating some of the other prominent women of this time might also be interesting if you choose; there’s Gulbadan, female historian for her brother; Bega Begum, Humayan’s formidable chief wife; Sham and Mihr-angez, female life partners who seem very likely to be an early Mughal example of a Boston marriage (more details and suggestions can be found at this link here)

*That said, I also love the period after Humayan’s death—Hamida and Maham Anga are, between the two of them, trying their best to keep this child Emperor alive and against all odds, prevail. Their relationship has broken down by canon, but what was it like in the past? Did they trust each other more? Less? I imagine they had to cooperate and compromise; how did Maham Anga managing the household while Hamida saw to external affairs affect matters between them?

Shipping-wise, I’m fine with Hamida paired with Hindal or Maham Anga or any other pairing you want to explore—I’m also okay with a canon-divergence or alternate history version of events, in case you want Maham Anga or Hindal to live longer than established, or for Hamida’s life to take different turns than those we know!

Fandom 3: Mystic Pop-Up Bar

Characters: Weol-joo, Gwibanjang | Yi Hon

Where to Find Source: Netflix

This was a delightful canon to find during a stressful time, and the honest sweetness of the main leads always brought a smile to my face. SPOILER warning from now on, just to explain what I enjoyed the most about canon--

--but I really adored Weol-jo and the Crown Prince’s romance above all else. 500 years of pining, secret identities/identity porn, and bonus bickering friends turned lovers the second time around made for everything I wanted, especially with a fantasy twist. The story was always Weol-joo’s, in all her prickly glory, and Gwi was--in his own words--only there to help her. I also really, really loved that despite their shared sense of humor, Weol-joo and Gwi are both extraordinarily competent and good at their jobs, and canon goes out of its way to emphasize that. Yes, they might bicker about nonsense --and my reading of the situation is that most of this is being intentionally facetious, both to be underestimated and because it appeals to their shared sense of humor. So some prompts, to be combined as you wish:

* More about how Yi Hon and Weol-joo met and fell in love! If I understood the prologue correctly, they both entered Yi Hon’s dreamworld to put down multiple angry ghosts, with a vendetta against the royal family, and I’d love to see how this played into the start of their romance. For one, their feelings--shallow as they initially seem--were strong enough to last half a millenium, and so must have been born in adventure and magic; for another, as demure as young Weol-joo was, I refuse to believe her usual snark didn’t show its head as she got to know the Crown Prince.

* Chief Gwi’s first eleven months as Weol-joo’s manager, complete with silent pining and unknowing painful jabs on the part of an oblivious Weol-joo, and how exactly Gwi manages to break through Weol-joo’s shell so effectively by the time we meet them. (Potentially the answer to that might be an impetuous, desperate hookup Weol-joo at least is going to pretend never happened.)There is such potential for adventures and plotfic we missed, and I’d love to see that too!

* Finally, if you want to write post-canon casefic, what about another grudge that the family settles (along with getting accustomed to be an actual family)--potentially something where the reincarnation of Won-hyung’s sister (she was jilted by her childhood friend and orphaned by the same man on her wedding day; and we saw everyone else who was affected by the tragedy leading into Weol-joo’s death, except her) appears, either for revenge or to have closure; or--and this could play into the previous prompt too!--any ghost/grudge-holder who forces the trio to explore either his parents’ past lives or a canon-divergence AU where Weol-joo and the Crown Prince never died, and Kang-bae was born to them, either as a royal prince, or as their child in hiding? (Of note, if you go with this one, I love Weo-rin to bits, and I’d love to see her get to discover her boyfriend’s big secret at last!)

I hope at least some of these help, Mystery Author! Thank you in advance and have a wonderful Yuletide yourself:D

#yuletide #dear yuletide letter #devil’s cub #jodhaa akbar #mystic pop up bar #hamida #maham anga

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kimyoonmiauthor · 5 years ago

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Why Your Books Will Get Banned (Old Nanowrimo Post)

I used to post this game on Nanowrimo. I saved the text before Nanowrimo declared that the N-word spelled out was OK and this wasn’t a democracy (2010, in the archives, at the bottom). I figure it’s OK to post that unless they didn’t change their policy since then, because they want prejudice (though that wasn’t the worst of what they wouldn’t mod). Writing forums need to be run at the top by diverse people, and not just white women. Separate post though. BTW, I have witnesses who still remember this incident, so it isn’t slander. I was working on diversity in the writing forums before WeNeedDiverseBooks was a thing and squandered the opportunity by making it only YA. And I’ll still call them out for that. It got challenged, this thread once, much to the laughter of everyone. (for being anti-Christian lol) If the writer is out there that challenged the thread and somehow got published. Thumbs up, good for you. Maybe you revised since then? The thing I didn’t post with this post every year from 2005-2010 I did this post was I posted it because I wanted people to think hard on Free Speech and what it meant. So I’ll hardball it this time. As you read the list, think hard on who is gate keeping. And who has the right to gate keep. Is gate keeping a tool to oppress and do the power minorities have a right to use the same tool back? How many books don’t even get a chance to be published? I’d also add that chasing after individual authors for the last 10 years has done nothing to change the system. The percentages are the exact same. And how that affects what people in the future will think of us now. Can you write a book that won’t be challenged on these fronts at all? And if you’re going to say, “You’re anti-cancel culture” This was posted before “cancel culture” was a thing. This is more like an examination of the system of censorship itself. (Because look, I like examining systems.) If you want to take this list, BTW, this is years and years of my work reading through ALA who never compiled this list. I’d been following the list since High School when I did a banned book class (which was a fad of the time, I think). So... maybe, give me credit? I feel sad I have to say that. And thanks to Jakob Nielsen and my Typography prof for teaching me the way to format text.

This thread was originally started in honor of ALA Banned Book Week. I've started this several years in a row. Disclaimers for this thread: ('cause I've done this for a few years) 1. We do not support the idea of banning/challenging books.  2. We are doing this for fun and it should not be taken seriously.  3. If you are seriously offended by the fact that we would write these scenes into books please consider the following: a. It is out of context. b. You probably unwittingly own a banned book without knowing it. Please check the list: <a href="http://www.ala.org/bbooks/frequentlychallengedbooks">http://www.ala.org/bbooks/frequentlychallengedbooks</a> c. We are not popular enough to get our books banned, and by hoping in a weird way that they will get banned, you are helping our egos. ^.~ d. If you are religious, the Qu'ran, the (I think Ramayana), the Torah, the Bible all have been challenged or banned. (KJV of the Bible if you plan to be snooty, by even more ironically Jews once, and Atheists the second time). (The Art of War, I also believe was challenged/banned.) (And also, the Bible probably contains more than half of the issues that Christians ban other books for. Christians banned Moll Flanders. All the issues the banned Moll Flanders for is in the Old Testament. Particularly Genesis)  4. This is not a thread for hot debate on the moralities of book banning. It is for listing why you think your book will get banned. If you would like to do so--please start a separate thread. You don't have to stick to Nanowrimo for this thread either.

General Notes: ('cause I like to point out the humor) - This thread was challenged and asked to be banned before. (Because someone was offended by the contents.) The challenge failed, BTW, just in case you'd like to challenge it again. - You probably have to write Young Adult and under to get banned *most* of the time. - Asterisks indicate new ones for the year. (BTW, most of it is about Islam, this year... sex and violence of course)

Want to avoid getting banned/challenged? (Categorized by how the banners see it for maximum head desk based on real book challenges and bannings.)

RELIGION You can't talk about religion. -- No taking the Lord's name in vain. -- You can't have anyone question the will of God or curse them when they lose faith after losing their best friend. (Bridge to Terabithia) -- Anything from Islam --- Cannot include Islam, even as a text book, because it will "indoctrinate the students into the Islamic religion." even if you are only covering it as a chapter. * (World History by Ellis, Elisabeth Gaynor and Anthony Esler.) *

-- Anything (fill in your religion here.) because some people are (fill in your exclusionary term here) -- Atheism (though not a religion, still argued by the theists as one. =P) -- You can't swear, including the word "damn." -- A boy and a girl can't live together if not related, because it's obviously living in sin. -- Can't be detrimental to Christian values.* (The Handmaids Tale, which is BTW, based on a Biblical story...) (The Bible, Torah, Qu'ran and many other religious books have been banned. Yes, if you have a religious book, it has most likely been banned or challenged.)

SOCIAL INEQUALITY You can't talk about class or classism.

You can't talk about race. -- You can't use racial slurs. -- You can't talk about racism. -- You can't have a black bunny marry a white bunny because that's supporting interracial marriage. (The Rabbit's Wedding, though Once Upon a Time in Wonderland also does this explicitly... must have enraged the challenger.) -- The book can't be deemed racist in any fashion. -- You can't talk about Mexican-American issues or history. (Apparently it's a lie that Mexican Americans get racism. *cough*) (Arizona Governor, though it was overturned later). -- You cannot have a Person of Color explicitly on the cover of the book. (Barnes and Nobles pulled that off with Cindy Pon's Silver Pheonix--not to mention all the other publishers.)

No talking about over eating, bad eating habits. No talking about disabilities including cerebral palsy. Can't be sympathetic to Armenians or for portraying Azerbaijans as "savages" [book burner's words] (because apparently you will get a $12,700 price on your head to *cut your ear off* for being historically accurate.) (Stone dreams by Aylisli) *

QUILTBAG Issues: -- You can't talk about sexuality. (As in the willingness to have sex). -- You can't talk about sexual orientation. (As in Straight LGB) -- You can't talk about gender identity issues unless it is cis and not crime investigation kind either. - Main character cannot have two fathers. (The Popularity Papers by Amy Ignatow)

Magic Issues: You can't have talking animals. (Peter Rabbit.) Oh, no magic, no mention of witches, and no fantasy (That promotes Satanism and teaches them to do evil satanic spells). (Harry Potter)

VIOLENCE Children can't do violence, especially to adults or to each other. Especially school violence. You can't have kids doing stunts or possibly hurting themselves. No realistic depictions of the Vietnam War. Can't be Graphic.* (The House of the Spirits) - Cannot have violent illustrations.* (The Librarian of Basra by Jeanette Winter and Nasteen's Secret School by Jeaenette Winter)

No dysfunctional families. -- You can't talk about child abuse.

No characters may ever die. -- No dead parents. -- No dead siblings. -- No dead best friends (Even if you are a Christian author, other Christians will come after you). (Bridge to Terabithia) -- No dying adults. -- You may not mention anyone dead (already) or dying (currently). -- No young infants dying. -- No talk of euthanasia.

You can't have any mention of cannibalism. (Alive, etc)

DRUGS You can't mention any drugs, including alcohol, especially with teenagers drinking it. (The Perks of Being a Wallflower--though there are many others) --- Children can't carry alcoholic beverages.

GENERAL MORAL OBJECTIONS You can't have it be morally corrupt. -- You can't have monsters of any kind. (Where the Wild Things Are) It can't be a "Downer" (Anne Frank) And by all means it can't be "icky." "gross" or "scary" (Goosebumps) Can't be perceived as Anti-feminist.* You can't be a PoC and write something negative about being a PoC.* (The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian) - Cannot have "inappropriate content" (Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman [Welcome to the banned books club, Mr. Gaiman.])* - You cannot have a single mother. (The popularity papers by Amy Ignatow.)* - Cannot be a "Bad book" that "one shouldn't be associated with."* (Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison) - Cannot have "an underlying socialist-communist agenda."*(Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison--note it was challenged in her own home state for this....) - Cannot have a book that goes on about "developmental preparedness" (i.e about children developing?) and "student readiness." (The Story of a Childhood by Marjane Satrapi)*

No children defying authority figures. -- No cursing at parents. -- No disobeying parents. -- You can't have kids breaking dishes (especially to avoid washing them). (A Light in the Attic)

No toilet humor. You can't have characters eating worms, because that's unsanitary. (How to Eat Fried Worms)

SEX Your book can't mention any private parts. You can't mention body parts (this was how it was phrased. --;;) -- Even if you have drawings of lots of people on the beach, not even one of them, even when drawn at 2cm x 2cm can be topless, even as a joke. (Where is Waldo) -- No talk or showing of nudity. (even when private parts aren't shown) -- You cannot teach sexual issues in your book to middle school students. * (The Middle School Survival Guide)

You can't have masturbation or any mention of sex. -- No beastiality -- No showing of safe sex. (Apparently Teen pregnancy is still A-OK, but safe sex isn't! --;;) -- And you can't use any words with "tit" in them. (Title will now be called tidle just not to offend anyone.) (Harry Potter)

Rape may be seen by banners as a type of porn. (I see it as violence, but the banner saw it as titilating sex. --;; *gags*) (Speak)

AUTHOR CAN'T BE... -- LGBT (Asexuality, apparently, is still safe.) -- You can't have the same name as anyone connected to "Socialism" or "Marxism." (Texas School board)

Good luck getting it published.

So yes, this was started as satire. If you have any further questions about said history of said thread, you are welcome to PM me. Do not start it in the thread.

And please reply using the "reply" button at the bottom of the page, not this post.

Banned books for this year PDF: http://www.ila.org/BannedBooks/ALA016%20Short%20List%20L3c_low%20%281%29.pdf

#american library association

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canaryrecords · 5 years ago

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"Love - the absolute circle of trustfulness - that's the secret of it all. I love the birds, the snakes, the society person, the academic, and the baby - all creatures of the universe are alike, and they will never harm you unless you fear them." -Charles Kellogg, 1915 Charles Dennison Kellogg was unlike any performer in the history of the American stage. He developed a few key obsessions - the forest, love, vibration, fire - into an irresistibly charismatic package and then sold that package in the form of himself through an uncanny use of the press, a vigorous appetite for travel, and a need to be the center of attention through a serpentine five-decade career as a pontificator and showman. In the early decades of the twentieth century, he amused and astounded heiresses and industrialists, yogis and artists, scientists and, most of all, the plain folk of most states in the union with demonstrations of his vision of a wholesome and interconnected world of all living things. His memory has largely faded, but he left behind a memoir, riddled with gaps and touched with hokum, many photographs, hundreds of press notices and reviews in newspapers, over an hour of sound recordings, at least one fragment of film, and a legacy of naturalism and invention that has entered into the lore of his native California. Kellogg was born October 2, 1868, the fourth of five children to Henry Kellogg (b. 1822 in New London, Connecticut) and Mary E. Carlisle (b. 1845 in Jefferson, New York) in the Sierra Nevada mountains of northern California’s Plumas County in a settlement called Spanish Ranch “nearly a hundred miles from the nearest railroad,” according to Kellogg. His father’s involvement in a nearby goldmine in the 1850s paid off, and he used his share of the profits to establish a provisions store for the area prospectors. Kellogg wrote that his mother was the only white woman in the area, and that he “lost her in infancy.” In fact, she left the family when he was about 3 years old, and his autobiography gives us an indication of the wound her abandonment left through the pains with which he purposefully wrote her out of his life’s story. (She died in Long Beach, California in 1917.) In his auto-mythology, Kellogg was as a child close to a Chinese servant named Moon and an unnamed Indian woman, who, he wrote, “taught me to fear no creature [and] taught me, too, the habit of minding my own business, letting the other fellow alone - bird, bear, snake, Indian and other humans. […] My earliest recollection is sitting with the Indians about their campfires or watching the Chinamen boil their rice between stones.” The impressions of the sounds and feelings of the wilderness in early childhood embedded themselves deeply in young Charles. He recalled it as a period of immense freedom, a world with “no doctors, missionaries, telephone, telegraph, schools, saloons, poorhouse, jail or gamblers; no police for there was no disorder. There were birds, grizzly bears, deer, wolves, foxes, skunks, badgers, mountain lions, wild cats, snakes, and all the smaller wood folk.” It was also here that before the age of six, he witnessed a wedding for the first time and learned about death and funeral rites among the Chinese. In this powerful paradise of vivid experiences, he was “lonely, but not unhappy,” spending his days “always preoccupied with birds and insects, listening to them and talking to them in their own languages.” It was between the ages of four and six that he began to experiment with his ability to imitate birds, forcing air through this nose with his mouth closed. He claimed throughout his adult life that this remarkable ability came down to an anatomical formation in his larynx similar to that of a songbird. This claim, repeated thousands of times, often backed up with the validation of unnamed doctors, was, of course, utter nonsense, but it is not clear whether he believed it, on some level, himself. It was many years after Kellogg had been sent off to live with his mother’s relatives in Syracuse, New York at the age of six or seven that Charles realized that he was in possession of a remarkable skill. In Syracuse, he learned to work with tools, to build furniture and fireplaces - skills he valued and worked into his persona as a woodsman. He attended Syracuse University and sang in the choir, aware that a relative of his father’s (by marriage) Clara Louise Kellogg, had become a famous soprano. But apart from mentions of his education in the manly, manual crafts, the period from the ages of seven to twenty-two when Kellogg became a civilized, college-educated Yankee were never mentioned in Kellogg’s stories. They didn’t serve what he was selling about himself. Almost immediately after graduation, we have the first press notice of Charles Kellogg as a performer, August 1891 at Chautauqua, New York, a hotbed of aspirational “edutainment,” where he debuted his unique bird-imitation talent. Realizing that he was on to something, he gave at least a half-dozen concerts of music with bird imitation at YMCAs, churches, and meetings around Pennsylvania and New York at the beginning and end of the year and another half-dozen in California a few months later. There were more shows in California in 1893-94, then back to Pennsylvania and Massachusetts in 1896-97. All of February and March of 1898 was spent touring Pennsylvania and Ohio. January through April of 1900 was spent on the road through Pennsylvania, Ohio, Maryland, D.C., and Virginia, by which time he was claiming to have anywhere from a 9 1/2 to 12 1/2 octave vocal range. After getting married for the first time, he spent November 1900 to April 1901 touring the same states again plus Connecticut and published an article in Success magazine called “The Wickedness and Folly of Killing Birds.” In early 1902, through Horace Traubel, friend and executor of Walt Whitman, Kellogg met the naturalist John Burroughs, thirty years’ Kellogg’s senior, with whom he traveled to Jamaica during January and February. Kellogg held Burroughs (as wells as naturalist John Muir, with whom he also spent several days with at one point) in esteem and treasured the memory of their trip. Burroughs was certainly an influence on and model for Kellogg. Whether Kellogg was aware of Burrough’s fierce denunciation in a 1903 article for the Atlantic denouncing contemporary nature-writers tendencies to anthropomorphize the natural world is unclear, but it was major news among naturalists for years, ultimately drawing comment from President Theodore Roosevelt. In 1904, Kellogg and his brother bought a 45 acre plot in North Newry, Maine, where they built the Kellogg Nature Camp, a Summer vacation resort for city folk wanting to spend time in with the woods. They built cabins connected by boardwalks, a common-house with a large fireplace (a specialty of Charles’s) and powered it with a waterwheel. It is now part of a nature reserve with many of the structures they built still standing. And each year during each late Fall, Winter, and early Spring, in an ever expanding radius, Kellogg began to cover the country with shows of his knowledge of and ability to replicate bird song - Tennessee and Kentucky by 1903, Nebraska and Kansas by 1907. By that time, shows regularly lasted two hours and received glowing reviews everywhere he went. His break came at the age of 43 in 1910, by which time he had left his first wife Emily and relocated to San Francisco and had ingratiated himself within a world wealthy socialites, where he was a favorite at parties. On December 4 The Call newspaper ran a, glowing illustrated full-page article on him titled The Man Who Sings With Birds in Their Own Language, which crystalized in print the stage-show that Kellogg had been assiduously developing, year after year, for nearly two decades. "He has the uttermost faith in the power of love and kindness,” the article asserted. “’It is all love," he says. 'Anybody who goes into the woods with the spirit of love in his heart without the faintest desire for destruction or possession can make friends with the birds if he is merely tactful and patient. Birds can read the heart better than men. They know their friends and are ready to love them.' In Kellogg's mind, there is no place for fear or hatred [...] Fear creates fear. Hatred breeds hatred. Love engenders love. These are the cardinal tenants of Kellogg's creed." His count of 3,000 performances in 24 years was, like almost everything else he said, likely an exaggeration but not so far from the truth that you could discount the claim out of hand. Twenty years of stories, stage patter, and tricks caught the public imagination. Less than a month after the article appeared in San Francisco, Kellogg went to Camden, New Jersey to cut his first trial disc for Victor Records on January 24, 1911 and then another four performances on the 28th. Victor didn’t release any of them. When Kellogg went back on the road on the east coast from October to December 1911, he had a new repertoire of claims for his abilities. This is when his press notices begin to claim that his throat is abnormally formed like that of a bird’s. And that: -He’d been to Paris and Berlin and received high praise. (His sister-in-law did invite him to perform at a private salon in Paris, where he met August Rodin, but not until 1912.) -His throat had been examined at Harvard. (He had been claiming that he’d “baffled scientists” there for years, and that they’d measured his vocal range from 64 cycles a second to 49,560 cycles.) -He speaks 15 animal languages and can communicate with bears, rattlesnakes, worms (who, he said, can sing), lizards, squirrels, etc. -That a man could (theoretically) be pinned motionless to a tree with the use of sound. -And, most crucially for his career from this point forward, that he could extinguish fire with sound. In February 1912 an article making many of these claims along with his belief that “vibration will ultimately take the place of electricity as a motive force” ran in syndication across the country in advance of his having signed with the Orpheum chain of vaudeville theaters for whom he performed three shows a day (a matinee and two at night) for months across the west coast - Winnipeg, Spokane, Los Angeles, etc - from April 1912 until April of the following year and then, without his standard Summer break, for the rest of 1913 across the east coast plus Indiana, Illinois, North Carolina, and Kansas. In New York City, he gave a demonstration of divination for water for another syndicated news article. He spent 1914 touring the west coast and midwest before returning to the Philadelphia area where he remarried to Sarah “Sad’i” Fuller Burchard on January 14, 1915 in Wilmington, Delaware. One month later, he went again to Camden, New Jersey in February 1915, where over two days he recorded the first four performances that were issued on discs. He was almost 47 years old and had spent the past 25 years on the road developing his act in halls, theaters, auditoriums, clubhouses, churches, tents, homes, and high schools. Kellogg’s assessment of vaudeville does not have the ring of disreputable behavior that has often been handed down through the years: “Back stage is not such a fry cry from the forest, for on these vaudeville stages I find conditions that are congenial to my own habits of the woods - conditions I do not find elsewhere in the world. In hotels, railroads, and even private homes, tobacco and other noxious odors, and not infrequently even uncleanliness such as cuspidors, are not unusual. System, punctuality and order are seldom the rule. In the forest, in all nature, punctuality, order, and system are the very breath of life. The stars, the tides, the migration of birds, the appearance of herbs, the trees, the flowers are all on time, giving that sense of harmony felt, and rejoiced in by all. Back stage, I find pure air in perfect ventilation, no tobacco, no bad odors, scrupulous cleanliness, system, order, punctuality - in a word, the perfection of organization, bringing quiet and a reposeful atmosphere in which to work.” Kellogg’s first vaudeville tour was a 1912-13 run at the west coast Orpheum chain, run by Percy Williams who was known as the first vaudeville impresario to pay high fees to the acts he wanted. The west coast Orpheum houses were run locally and, according to Joe Lurie Jr’s Vaudeville: From the Honky-Tonks to the Palace (1953), unlike many of the rowdier and down-market vaudeville theaters, “they were all fine, clean, well-appointed theaters, running clean shows, and were a credit to their towns.” Kellogg performed at shows with as many as eight other acts on the bill. The shows in Washington opened just after Bert Williams’ run and included a spoof of the domestic morality play Everywoman titled Everywife, the blackface comedy duo McIntyre and Heath, the Fearless Ce Dora (“one continuous thrill through the seven minutes which she spends revolving at railroad speed inside [a] golden globe”), and Thomas Edison’s early, abortive attempts at talking pictures. Through 1915 and 1916 Kellogg was headlining in the eastern U.S. for both Orpheum and B.F. Keith’s circuits of vaudeville houses in the eastern U.S. and Quebec as well as Majestic Theaters in the midwest and Texas, where others on the bills included dog acts, monkey acts, the Dennis Brothers’ rotating ladder act, and various acrobats, singers, and comedians. At the end of each show was Kellogg, standing in front of a painted woodland backdrop. Second on the bill for at least one of those shows was the Three Keatons, including 20 year old Buster, who was on the verge of leaving for Hollywood. Kellogg himself appeared second on the bill in late 1916 only under Nora Bayes, arguably the most popular singer in the U.S. His proclamations to the press at the time ranged from the flatly false (that he did not believe “that wild animals die unless molested by man or that they struggle with each other, because I have never seen them do either,” that he did not know his own age, that hat he spent 9 months of the year in the wilderness and came “into civilized society only when the call of a friend proves too strong to resist”) to the simply peculiar and the nearly-true (that he had “never read a book through - print disturbs me - although I believe in the teaching of the Bible as I have heard of them from others, because I have seen the proved true in my own life,” and “I have never tasted fish, flesh, or fowl, although I am not a vegetarian,” that dogs will die from long durations of discordant sounds) to the charming, bordering on visionary (“Fear - that’s what causes all sin. Fear of money, fear of getting caught, fear of wounded vanity, fear of public opinion, all all the rest,” and “I can take the recorded songs of a thousand birds and they will be harmonious. That’s because they are in tune with nature, while man and his instruments need to be attuned.”) Kellogg was an avid photographer, claiming never to take a gun (or a compass, claiming an inborn sense of direction) into the woods, but producing photographs prolifically from 1902 onward. We know that he had performed in Rochester, New York, home of the Eastman-Kodak company, by December, 1900, around the time of the introduction of the “brownie” camera - the first cheap, popular device for making photos. It is unclear whether he might at that point met Gertrude Achilles Strong (b. May 4, 1860; d. May, 1955), a recent divorcee and the daughter of Henry A. Strong, co-founder and first president of the Kodak company, or whether they met much later in the late 1910s in Hawai’i. Regardless, their meeting and relationship was pivotal for Kellogg. His first disc for Victor certainly sold very well, likely in the tens of thousands, and he claimed that he could earn $4,000 a week (a staggering $100,000 in today’s money - and more than half of the $7,000 a week that the Orpheum paid Sarah Bernhardt, their highest-paid entertainer) performing in the 1910s, and his family was relatively wealthy. But they weren’t Gertrude Achilles Strong wealthy. Almost no one was. When she died in 1955, she left behind a fortune of over nine million dollars, making her the single richest person in the history of the state of California at the time, well into the top half of the richest 1% nationally. In 1913, Kellogg bought over 88 acres in Morgan Hill, south of San Francisco, an area he dubbed “Ever Ever Land,” where he built an inventive and “environmentally responsive” open plan cabin that he called “The Mushroom.” Around 1920, Gertrude Achilles Strong bought his land and more than 500 additional surrounding acres. She built a mansion for herself there at a cost of $276,000 (four million today) as well as a house for Kellogg and his wife and put him on her permanent payroll as property manager. He built water systems for her property and built and patented a riding fruit and nut picker for the property, while he lived comfortably with his wife Sad’i and two young live-in maids for the rest of his life. Each winter from 1915 through 1919, Kellogg toured from coast to coast, stopping in Camden, New Jersey to record a few performances for Victor Records, where he cut a total of 26 performances, six of which the company the company destroyed without having issued them. On February 15 and 16, 1916, he recorded four light classical pieces, imitating birds and following along the well-known melodies, as if a bird were singing the tunes in its down language. On the 15th, Alma Gluck, a star of the Metropolitan Opera and one of the most popular sopranos in the U.S. also recorded three of her best-selling performances. Although she did not record on the 16th, and Kellogg possibly traveled more than 100 miles north to Dalton, Pennsylvania near Scranton to visit friends on the 17th when Gluck recorded “The Bird of the Wilderness,” with words by Rabindranath Tagore, he joined her again in Victor’s studio on the 18th for two bird-themed performances on which Kellogg provided bird imitations. When the single-sided 12” disc of “Listen to the Mockingbird” was released in the Spring along with a significant marketing push by Victor, its sales exceeded expectations. When “Nightingale Song” from a mid-19th century operetta called Der Vogelhandler (The Bird Seller) by the Austrian composer Carl Zeller, was released a month or two later as a less-expensive 10,” it became one of the best-selling records of the decade. Apart from the two sides recorded with Gluck, Kellogg’s recordings are evenly divided between the bird-imitation novelties with musical accompaniment (an unenduring genre that grew in popularity both on stage and on records in the early decades of the 20th century) and segments of his stage act in which he would lecture on his relationship with the wilderness with demonstrations of bird-calls interspersed. Seven of those sides remain a fascinating glimpse of Kellogg’s performing persona. The last of them, titled “Bird Chorus,” recorded without commentary on January 14, 1919 is an extraordinary and unheralded moment in the history of sound recording. Starting in January 1915 and through all of 1916, Kellogg added a section of his stage act in which he turned on “an orchestra” of six Victrolas borrowed from local dealers in each town, and played discs of his bird-imitation and then proceeded to perform with them, simulating, as one reviewer put it, “a voice from the deep forest.” For the “Bird Chorus” disc Kellogg simplified the process to a single disc of his own performing along with a live performance, ingeniously weaving two continuous sequences of songs together to give the impression of multitudes of birds singing together. It is the first instance of overdubbing. Notably lacking from Kellogg’s discography are examples of his most spectacular and longest-lasting piece from his stage act - the “Blade of Flame.” By the beginning of 1912, Kellogg introduced a gas burner on stage which produced a four-foot blue flame inside a glass tube. Kellogg told his audience that because all of nature is connected through vibration and because of the gift he possessed of a vocal range many times that of highly trained singers and larger than that of a grand piano, he could cause the “blade of flame” to dance and ultimately to extinguish it using only his voice. It was, next to his bird-imitating, his best-known and best-loved routine. He augmented it with a demonstration of the technique of building fire by wood friction (a skill he imparted to the then-nascent Boy Scouts). Naturally, his fire performances in enclosed theaters were of some concern to local fire departments, and he made it a regular public relations stop to visit fire houses in each town during the afternoons to demonstrate the act, reassuring them of his control of fire and wowing them along with the local press. The only footage apparently extant of Kellogg is one silent minute of a newsreel outtake Kellogg giving this demonstration for a group of Boston firemen on November 5, 1926. (The film, including ten precious seconds at the end of Kellogg demonstrating his bird-imitation technique facing the camera is available online at the University of South Carolina’s Moving Image Research Collections site.) He continued to elaborate the routine, using bowed tuning forks. In the mid-20s he arranged a series of radio broadcasts intended to demonstrate his hypothesis that vibrations broadcast at sufficient amplitude could extinguish house fires. His proposal was that in the future each house could be scientifically tuned such that fire departments would need only to broadcast the appropriate frequencies to put out the fires. The seed for the idea seems to have originated with Kellogg’s exposure to Herman Helmholtz’s book On the Sensation of Tone which had already been published in two editions in America before Kellogg began making theatrical use of its central concept, that the air around us is a medium through which vibration is transmitted in waves. Kellogg was so enamored with the idea that in May and June of 1913, Kellogg added a bit to his stage act in which he explained to the audience that mental vibrations are crucial in love and marriage and that “tuning” of a silent “mental wireless” to a compatible frequency with one’s mate was central to harmonious love. Newsprint reviews of his attempts to demonstrate this with his wife were decidedly snarky. The audience didn’t get it, and it was quickly dropped from the act. Kellogg’s greatest and most enduring “hit” as a showman was neither a stage-act nor a recording. It was a vehicle made from two large pieces. The first was a Nash Quad, a four-wheel drive truck capable of hauling four tons. The second was a 22-foot section of a fallen redwood log eleven feet in diameter. He obtained the former in early Summer 1917 from the Nash Motor Company in Kenosha, Wisconsin while they were being produced for use in the First World War. Kellogg convinced the company’s namesake president of a vision of the beauty of California’s enormous redwood forests (and, very likely, the publicity benefits of Kellogg’s scheme) and took the Quad to Bull Creek Flat in Humbolt County, where with the help of several axemen from the Pacific Lumber Company they spent months sawing off a section of a fallen tree, stripping its bark, and carving out its interior into a living quarters with beds, cabinets, kitchenette, and bathroom. Mounting it on the chassis of the Quad, he polished and varnished the whole thing a copper color and installed electric lights. By November of that year, he drove the wooden cabin-on-wheels that he dubbed the Travel-Log cross-country, stopping in Kenosha for work on the radiator and “finishing touches” (including their brand name, it seems). Using his celebrity and press-savvy, he toured the machine, giving talks on the beauty of the great redwoods and the dire need for their preservation, taking a piece of the forest to the people. In the process, he introduced America to the idea of a mobile home. It now resides in the Humbolt State Park’s visitor center, reportedly only yards from where the tree from which it was hewn grew for centuries. Kellogg recorded 11 more performances for Victor during the period 1924-26. Seven of them were discarded by the company without having been released. The remaining four were re-recordings of his first two records using the new invention of microphones. While he continued to perform, his schedule gradually slowed as he shifted his first to attention to Gertrude Achilles Strong’s property and then to a fascination with Fiji, where he first traveled in the Spring of 1925 from Hawai’i. Fixated on the idea of wooden lali slit-drums and their use in communication over distances, Kellogg arrived alone and presented himself as a naturalist to the Chief of the Native Department on the island of Suva, who showed him a the instrument and for him to visit to the island of Baqa to witness fire-walking (after Kellogg had given a demonstration of the “blade of flame” routine, having thoughtfully packed the gear needed for it, and gave a performance of “Narcissus” as a bird-imitator) in the company of a British medical doctor. Kellogg was suitably impressed and incorporated discussion of both lali drumming and fire-walking as further evidence of his central theme of the need for vibratory attunement in his subsequent performances through the 1920s and 30s. In 1929, Kellogg survived a near-fatal car crash immediately before he self-published The Nature Singer: His Book, a profusely photo-illustrated collection of impressions drawn from his life and career and a document of his own self-invention, which went through at least two printings (all of them signed; the first 1000 are numbered), wrapped in the attractive but exceedingly brittle birch parchment that he used as stationary and for press notices. That year, he also patented an automobile ignition that started with whistling. He continued to criss-cross the country, giving talks based on his experiences in nature combined with pleas for conservation. There was talk of a movie that never manifested. In 1940, he and Sad’i adopted a 9 year old girl named Shannon who had been born in Honolulu. (She subsequently married a Charles Newton, nine years her senior, in 1961, divorcing him in 1967, and died in 2007.) When in 1946 Paramahansa Yogananda published his Autobiography of a Yogi, describing his encounters with spiritual teachers and his travel in India and U.S., he briefly recounted in a footnote having seen Charles Kellogg do the “blade of flame” bit in Boston in the ‘20s. And that’s who Kellogg has been for the past century - a remarkable and unlikely figure at the intersection of science and art and showmanship and the spiritual. Charles Kellogg’s health declined through the 1940s before died of a heart attack on September 3, 1949 at the age of 80.

#CaliforniaHistory #vaudeville #78rpm #78 rpm #naturalist #whistling #birdimitation

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r3b3lgrrrrrrrl · 5 years ago

Text

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 75)

"Pitts✈LA✈Philly"

@creatureofthen1ght-v3

@lovemythsworld

@crystalbaby12

📷 manip cred @southsidequeenie

Colson wakes up groggy on the back of The Bus. Reaching for Luna with his eyes still closed, he's irritated when he remembers she's not there. Pulling his phone out, he looks to see if she called or anything. Nothing.

"She's always off somewhere...." He sighs, thinking to himself. Appreciating that Luna's independent but also feeling a bit lost himself when she's gone. Finding her was like growing an extra limb. When she's not near, his body has a phantom ache for her. "Lemme hit her up." He decides.

Shooting her a quick Snap, he sees his laptop sticking out of one of his bags. He pulls it out and digs through his red LV travel bag. Finding the things he wants, he settles back onto the bed.

Popping the flashdrive in that Luna gifted him for his birthday, he opens the file.

Sliding his hand down his pants, he starts stroking his cock in anticipation. Colson jerks off to himself fucking Luna for the first time. Watching himself with her. How they move and talk with each other. Her dominance and submissiveness, driving Colson to the brink. Throwing himself back, he explodes when his mind wanders to her warm mouth sucking his dick the morning she had given it to him to watch.

"God Damn, Loons..." He thinks of his future wife as he chuckles to himself.

Still sexually pleased by her. Even 3K miles apart.

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Landing at LAX there's an unseasonable chill to the air. Luna pulls on a soft gray sweater. Knocking her bandana off. Shoving it into her bag, She pulls out a pair of sunglass.

Hopping an uber to Frannie's, she notices a Snap from Colson. He looks miserable.

"What an Asshole..." She laughs to herself. Snapping him back with sass and love.

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"OH MY GLOB! OH MY GLOB! OH MY GLOB!! OH MY GLOB!!!! Paris burts out, squeezing Luna.

Luna having told her and Frannie about her engagement. P let's her go, wanting to pop a bottle, asking Frannie if she has champagne. Luna and Frannie laugh as they hug and Frannie gives P directions. Still holding tightly onto Luna. Her bestfriend's a bit cynical and rightfully so, considering her own current divorce.

"I'm so happy for you!" Frannie gushes to Luna.

Knowing her Soul Sister all too well, Luna pulls out of the hug. She winces a bit, forgetting to take any pain meds for her gunshot wound.

"What was..." Frannie goes to ask.

Luna interjects. "Buuuutttt....??" She asks with eyebrows raised.

"But don't make the same mistake I did. I don't care how much you love him. Get a prenup. At least for your family's history." Frannie sighs, advising from knowledge.

Luna pulls her back into their hug. Squeezing Frannie tight. She had half expected this.

"I hear you, Frans." She says softly in her ear.

Both girls squeeze each other. Over a decade of love, life, pain and understanding passing through them. The pop of the champagne bottle startles them as they break apart, laughing.

"LOONS IS IN LOOOOOVE AND GETTING MARRIED!!!!" P shouts, handing glasses off.

The three bestfriends cheers and laugh together. Luna asking to keep it kinda low key until she tells her grandmother and Colson his daughter. Her two friends nodding.

The girls have lunch. Talking and sharing champagne. Admiring the sweetness of her ring. Luna telling them the plan to get married in TownHall before the first weekend in August. Inviting them to both the intimate affair and the weekend rager. Frannie and Paris laugh at Luna's usual unconventional way of doing things. Excited about the festivities. They share a joint before Luna has to go. She has a performance with Ashley tonight.

The three bestfriends hug when Luna's uber arrives. Congratulating her again. Giving her Love and Kisses with their See Ya Soons.

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"Spill it." Paris says to Frannie once they've waved Luna GoodBye. "It's just quick. We seen 'em together, what? Once? And we were tripping balls. Everything's glorious when you're tripping balls." Paris throws her arm around Frannie's shoulder as they walk inside. "Then let's hang out with em. AND." She snaps the fingers of her free hand. "We gotta start planning her birthday party soon. Soooo... We're gonna need to talk to him anyway." P makes very valid points with her grin. Heading inside Paris can't help but ooze for her friend. She loves Luna and she love Love. Pulling up an old picture of them, P Congraulats one of her bestfriends on the sly. Or so she thinks.

"The peanut butter to my jelly. The Rock to my Roll. I love you and am over the moon!!!

💖🎉🎡🤘💫✨😍"

---------------------------------------------------

The Boys are in Philadelphia staying in Rittenhouse Sq. Right in the heart of the city. Colson, Slim and Baze have friends who live off of Lombard. Ashleigh hangs back, glad to be rid of their madness.

Walking over Colson gets a Snap from Luna.

Laughing, he plucks a flower off a bush. Popping it behind his ear. Grinning as he Snaps her back.

"What up, Dawg!!"

They're greeted by their friend Tyree. Finding LaMar in the kitchen rolling up. Its Dark and Hell is Hot blares through the Philly condo. Cracking beers, slamming shots, they burn and catch up.

Soon heading to Cheerleaders, a stripclub/sports bar close by.

------------------------------------------------

"You got something you wanna tell me?" Ashley blurts out to Luna.

"Well, Hello to you too, Pal." Luna responds laughing.

"Why's Paris BooLoven' you on Insta?" Ashley questions her.

"Seriously? What's it say?" Luna sighs.

"Nothing really but that she loves you and is Over the Moon" Ashley air quotes.

"Okay... Listen, I didn't call you because it literally happened last night and I wanted to tell you in person today..." Luna begins to explain.

"Okayy..." Her bestfriend peers at her.

Holding her phone in her hands so that Ashley can't see her fingers, Luna continues.

"Colson asked me to marry him last night." Luna tells her.

Stunned, Ashley says "Noooo..." With wide eyes. "What did you say?" She asks.

Luna shrugs before breaking into a grin. "I said Yeah."

Ashley squeals, grabbing for Luna's hand. Looking at the contraption on her left hand.

"What is this shit?" She asks bluntly.

Laughing, Luna explains how he forgot the ring but made her one out of his guitar string. And to shut the fuck up because she loves it.

"No... That's really... REEALLY You&Kells." She laughs, grinning.

Ashley pulls Luna in for a tight hug. Congratulating her bestfriend, telling her how happy she is for the couple. They link arms as they head to the stage to rehearse for tonight. Talking wedding plans along the way.

--------------------------------------------------

Cheerleaders is loud. Colson paying more attention to the Indians game than the girls.

Slim noticing the difference. Still his normal goofy, loud self, Colson interacts with the girls, talking and signing autographs but declines them on his lap.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Mar notices it also.

"He's getting maaaarried...." Baze teases Colson.

"YOOO!??" Ree flips around entering the conversation. "Tell me it's to that sweet piece of ass you did Bad Things wit!"

"Who???" Mar jumps back in.

Colson laughs, pulling a picture of Luna up on his phone. It's a simple sideshot of her.

"Damn, she got more tattoos than you do, Son!!" Mar exclaims.

"She looks like a fucking badass, Homie. How your lanky ass score that??" Ree busts Colson's balls.

"She knows what it is." Colson smirks.

Slim, Baze, Benny and Rook burst out laughing at him.

"Yo. LunaTic will fuck you up, Kells!" Rook calls him out.

Slim turns to their friends, explaining how Luna does NOT take anyone's shit. Including Kells. Joking that in the last two months that she's been around, he's seen her open more cans of whoop ass than Stone Cold Steve Austin could've ever ordered.

The Guys laugh hysterically at Slim's reference. Benny, Rook, Baze and Colson knowing it's true.

"Yo! So, you got a RIDA!? When we gonna meet Mrs. Homie?" Mar asks.

"She's in Cali right now performing but she'll be back before tomorrow night. Come to the show. We'll kick it after." Colson tells them.

Both men nod in agreeance. Wondering about this LunaTic who seems to have tamed such a Wild Boy.

They carry on drinking, laughing and teasing Colson.

--------------------------------------------------

"HOW YOU FEELING, WAZZMATAZZ?" Ashley asks, stalking around the stage.

She's the Headliner of the concert. Opening with Now or Never, Colors and Eastside. She nails a stripped down version of Closer before bringing Luna out.

"I SAID HOW YOU FEELING!??" She screams to their roars. "I did a song with my bestfriend. It's currently sitting at #1. And I'd like to think that it's because it's the truth." She continues, adjusting her earphone as she walks the stage. "All art is based on some sense of truth, and if our art is number one, it's because WE'RE NOT THE ONLY TWO PISSED OFF!!" She screams to the energetic crowd. "So I've got her with me tonight. The ONE, THE ONLY, THAT BROOKLYN FUCKING BIIITCH!!" Ashley screams introducing Luna to the venue's explosion.

Luna comes out in a plain white tank and black skinnies.

"Did I hear people are pissed off?" Luna asks excitedly as she comes onto the stage. "FUCK right we are!!!!" She bellows to the audience's screaming agreement. "Let's show 'em how angry!!" She shouts looking at Ashley as the opening chords play.

Both girls begin to bounce with the melody, swinging their arms and legs wildly. Ashley blasts into the opening chorus as her band nails the chords. Fire exploding in the background.

🎶I🎶

🎶Keep a record🎶

🎶Of their wreckage🎶

🎶And their lies🎶

🎶We're starting to recognize🎶

🎶The weapon in our minds🎶

🎶They talk shit🎶

🎶But we won't take it 🎶

🎶This time🎶

🎶As I realize🎶

The band drops out as Luna comes in strong. Unyielding.

🎶I'm out for blood🎶

🎶And it won't be sweet🎶

Ashley's band picks back up as Luna sings. Bouncing and jumping around the stage, using her hands to express her points. Dipping low to touch fan's hands.

🎶Tired of having the rugs🎶

🎶Pulled from beneath our feet🎶

🎶Done trusting lies🎶

🎶Done trusting Men🎶

🎶Picking each other up🎶

🎶And putting ourselves🎶

🎶Back together again🎶

The masses chant with her. Growing louder as Luna calls out Society's standard of women. Luna dead panning certain lyrics.

The Girls cross paths, tossing their mics to each other as they hit separate corners of the stage.

🎶Come on Little Ladies🎶

🎶Give us a smile🎶

🎶No we ain't got nothing🎶

🎶To smile about🎶

Ashley and Luna rip through the lyrics as the lights pop and smoke billows. Belting together how they don't owe You a God Damn Thing.

Ashley kicks back in hard with the chorus. The stage explodes again with fire. The crowd venting along with the two bestfriends.

🎶I🎶

🎶Keep a record🎶

Ashley continues as her and Luna bounce and jump across the stage. Grinning and tossing each other satisfied looks as the crowd rages with them.

It's a volcanic experience as Ashley and Luna dance and sing across the stage with each other. Filled with passion and genuine resentment.

🎶I'm no sweet dream🎶

🎶But I'm a hell of a night🎶

Ashley taunts before Luna slides in.

🎶No I won't smile🎶

🎶But I'll slow you my teeth🎶

🎶And I might let you speak🎶

🎶If you just let us breathe🎶

Luna squats, bouncing up and down. Singing her lyrics. The Band dropping so Luna and the audience can scream together.

🎶We're tired and angry🎶

🎶Digging up The Hill🎶

🎶So scared🎶

🎶Is what you should be🎶

Luna and Ashley come face to face taunting the other to smile. Telling each other there's nothing to smile about. Fire igniting and lights blaring as they let loose about how they don't owe anyone a God Damn Thing.

Ashley singing about keeping a record of all wreckages and lies. Firing exploding as the two artists bop around the stage, screaming about injustice.

Playing and pushing off the other. They really are a force to be reckoned with. On and off stage.

The keytar comes on solely as Luna and Ashley hit MidStage together. The loud room singing with them claiming Luna's heart's desire.

🎶Women like me🎶

🎶Can be real nightmares🎶

🎶Completely aware🎶

🎶But I'd rather be🎶

🎶A real nightmare🎶

🎶Than die unaware🎶

🎶Yeah🎶

🎶Women like me🎶

🎶Can be real nightmares🎶

🎶Completely aware🎶

🎶But I'm glad to be🎶

🎶A real nightmare🎶

The Girls both kick their limbs out while changing the last lines. Luna dipping down in front of her.

🎶So, save us🎶

🎶Your fucking Prayyyyerss!!!🎶

Before slaying the chorus together. Bouncing, grinning, bopping and jumping as the floor ruptures on fire around them with crowd.

Watching them, the two bestfriends are magnetic. Knowing each other's range, limit and place. They perform together as if they were back in Luna's bedroom. Jumping off of props instead of beds. In hindsight it's a beautiful thing to see how far they've both come. Never losing their core.

Grinning at each other, they storm into the chorus with the crowd. Thriving off each other on stage. Tossing mics as they pass, dropping them to signify certain lyrics.

Finishing the chorus together, Ashley goes first as The Girls hit separate corners of the stage.

🎶I'm not sweet dream🎶

🎶But I'm a hell of a night🎶

Luna singing after her. Ending the song.

🎶No, we're no sweet dream🎶

🎶But we're a hell of a night🎶

Coming back together, the bestfriends laugh and thank the crowd before Luna heads off.

Luna FaceTiming Sean as Ashley closes out the show with a hitting performance of Without Me.

"Heeeyyy!" She grins into the screen.

Chuckling, he asks what she wants. Luna explains how she's at WazzMaTazz. Ultimately, asking if she can borrow his jet tonight to get back to Philly for Colson's show tomorrow.

"What's in it for me?" The business man asks.

Luna laughs at Sean, replying that he'll have the pleasure of not feeling her foot up his ass.

"Alright, alright... You little Brooklyn Bitch..." He agrees with a laugh. "When you need it?" He asks.

"Uhhh.. Gimme like 2-3hrs?" Luna asks.

Diddy agrees, telling her he'll text her the details. Thanking him graciously, Sean warns her to stay out of trouble. Shaking his head as she smirks that she'll try, they say GoodBye.

Hanging up Luna sees she has a Snap from Colson.

She opens it, thinking of how much she loves him.

Once Ashley's OffStage, they hang out with the other performers. Luna especially enjoying her conversations with Fletcher and Ellie Goulding. Luna being fans of theirs and vice versa.

Before long, Luna's saying her GoodByes. She's off to the hanger. Flying from CA to PA. Across the country for the second time in less than 24hrs.

-------------------------------------------------

The Adderall finally wearing off, Luna's feeling the weight of the day. She pops two 30s and sips on an Old Fashioned.

Sleeping for most of the 6hr flight. She arrives on the East Coast as the sun begins to rise. Luna has to look at her phone to figure out what day it is. Surprised that it's Tuesday.

------------------------------------------------

Finally at the hotel, Luna takes a quick shower. Managing not to wake Colson until she wants to.

Crawling into bed with him, Colson's on his back. Luna kisses his cheek. Then his jaw. Down his neck to his collarbone.

He starts to stir as she lightly drags the tip of her tongue down his body. He doesn't have any clothes on. Luna kisses the top of his mound, his short pubes tickling her face.

Kissing his inner thigh, Colson reaches for her. Running his hands through her blonde hair. He calls out her name with a groan as she swirls her tongue around his hard cock's head.

Taking him in her mouth, Luna sucks Colson's dick, sliding and her gently twisting her wet hand along his base. Letting her free hand roam his body.

It being early in the morning and her suction firm and steady, Luna only needs to deep throat Colson a few times before he oozes into her mouth.

Both satisfied with her work, Luna swallows his load before washing her hands and climbing back into bed with him.

Laying on his chest, Colson strokes Luna's hair as he asks about CA. She gives him the details of her day. Him talking about how she'll meet Tyree and Lamar tonight.

They come up with the idea of flying Casie out to NY on Friday. He's thinking lunch with her, Patti and Emma. Telling them all together. Luna thinks it's a smart idea. They drift off together, cuddling.

Don knocks on their hotel room door around 11A. He doesn't bang anymore.

---------------------------------------------------

To be continued.....

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bloojayoolie · 6 years ago

Photo

Anime, Apparently, and Ass: File: furies ipg (405 KB, 1296x968) 631157670 631165562 >»631166037 Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)08:18:07 No.631156939 Alright boys, sit down for a tale of the most Autistic kid I have ever had the displeasure of running into Wolfman Greg >Re me >Be 16, around 2000 a popular kid either Kinda did my cwn thing really >Shared World History with this kid >His name was Greg il from arace and into autism >Greg at this point was quiet, and reserved, never did anything to get bullied >Especially after Columbine >Fnday b g to change soon >That Monday >Apparently Greg's parents had bought him a computer, and an Intenet connection sHe hvigusly hadn't showered at all since friday >He didn't really pay attention during class and was mostly drawing in his notebook >His smell was palpable Grea collected his things and headed for the door >Not before he bumped into a guy named Mike kewas hot pleased with Greg's odor >Greg stood silent for a moment >And then he did it Mike iust ushed Grea out of the way and made his way into the hallway and walked to his next class >The rest of the kids gave Greq a strange room for the rest of the day 631160061 631160215 631165562 >631165642 631165921 Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)08:26:44 No.631158773 File: 1437110427545.ipg (418 KB. 1955x2048) day Appars sinstead he bought a gray hoodie, and some cloth >And sewed some years to the hood >At least he showered this time Greg didn't do his homework the night before >The teac her was this really nice vegan lady from Oregon >She was a little pushy with homework but that was it really ork to be passed up front >She askd theirs >"Greg? Where's your homework? >Silence 3She anproached his desk >The room was stranoely tense, before this Grea was a good student >She was standing at Greg's desk 3She reached out for a niece of paper she assumed was his homework >And then he snapped at her >Not like screaming or yelling, but he he bite her >The teacher gasped >Grea just got up and Naruto ran out of the room hing before and we were really taken aback by him trying to bite the teacher, but the way he ran >No one saw Greg for the rest >Apparently he got on a table, curled up into a ball and tried to nap Indian man in charge didn't care enough to bother him of the day until one of the Stoner kids reported seeing Greq in after school detention Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)08:35:48 No.631160463 File: 1432672843827 ipg (1.79 MB, 5000x5000) 631160790 >631161301631165562 >Wednesday >Greg apparently wanted to make it up to the teacher euse er rold broke down vcle SOneele >She had what was left of a bug on her cheek that she missed She walked into class ten minutes after class started >She apologized for her being late >Greg walked up to her >Hood up >Shitty cloth ears flopping >She looked at him puzzled ant to tell me Greg? She was probably hoping for an apoloqy >Greg grabbed her face paper in his hand He nad lold And licked her cheek >And the bug quts too Grea then tueked the nanor into her breast pocket and sat back down >The teacher, as a testament to her character, pretended that never happened >The class went on as normal verge of tears the entire time while we were talking about the Boxer Rebellion When the bell rang again, Greg bolted full Naruto style out of the room >His hoodie came loose and fell off hair >Revealing a really shitty attempt at anime >After school as I was walking home I saw our US History teacher talking to the school cop >With her equally vegan and upset boyfriend there too We didn't see Grea for two weeks after that Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)08:47:48 No.631162869 File: Scared ipg (67 KB, 656x584) 631163694631164020 631164078631164239631165562 Thursday, two weeks after the incident >Grea was back >If you think he was bad after a weekend of early 2000s Internet, Greg has been SCARED He clearly hadn't showered, at all He looked like he slept, ate and shat in the gray eared hoodie He reoked very poorly made tail to the back d >By this time we we The teacher decided to hold class outdoors for once to demonstrate some things >As soon as we got outside, everyone put themselves up wind of Greg Evnthing was coing fine we were discussing the Battle of Somme in the gentle Arizona winter Greg, what are you doing? >All eyes shot to Greg to see what horror we were about to witness with one hand in th He didn't andwor >Everyone turned back to our teacher PAnd then the digging got more ferocious e grounds keepers worked really hard to grow that grass!" >No answer, he kept digging Greg!" tensified Grestop ar Still nothing Mike stood up and started walking towards Greg to stop him had a foot deep hole about square foot wide >Fvervone stonned >Their faces when >Greg tumed around SAnd started to poo >Oh God the stench Evione flinned and oot as far away from him as possible >Greg managed to fill the entire hole up >He then lifted his pants And then buried it >The 9/10 goth girl fainted Greg got sent to the office And was sent home for the day 631164732 631164845631164983 631165088 631165130631165135631165162631165268631165307 Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)08:56.32 No.631164486 631185639 22631166136 File: XaviOda jpg (19 KB, 320x240) Friday >Greg was tolerable that day, nothing happened The following Monday to class >Like realy late >The poor teacher marked him absent >Half way through the treaty of Versailles quess who showed up >And the horrar >We didn't see it at first, or for the next ten minutes we heard it Acnch >And not the normal granola kind >Like the wet, gross kind iting into a bone would make >The girl in front of Grea turneod around >She flipped her shit Greg what the fuckl" SA half eaten bird >He was late bec ause of this l aleo wotod to throw because he managed to catch a bird, kill it, and partially eat it The teacher approached him and attempted >Greg wasn't having it rescue the poor avian creature from this kid >A had o landed a bite on her >Mike had enough of this shit >Before he could react though Greg through his meal at him >The distraction worked o over a desk >He failed and landed face first on the tile >Luckily he had enough time to get up, spit out some blood and Naruto run out of the room eneheied te wcks of school bec ause of an infection though 31166912631166935631166956 631167039 22631167068 631167080 6311 Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)09:06:19 No.631166557 ile: 1437626420912.ipg (298 KB, 1024x768) >About a week into our poor teacher's absence >The substitute put us in the computer lab to research some shit: Thanks to her fatness and her odor, she was immune to Greq's smell barrier >Qur schedule was fucked that day >They were having a assembly for 8th graders that would be attending next vear >So we only had our first class that >For eight hours We broke for lunch, nothing weird happened with Greg, yet. Swhen we got back though, shit started happening >Evervone had the post lunch sleepies >Half the class was napping at their terminals was helping the 9/10 aoth gid work on her Horror novel >Wasn't too bad except for some grammar errors >And we were flirting >The substitute fell asleep at some point, leaving Greg free to do as he pleased >And he was really pleasing himself T happened to glance up and catch it >Grea was jacking it pretty hard >He must have just started because no one seems to have noticed yet ou stanng a- OH MY GOD >The aoth gid This in tum drew attention to Greg Who happened to start climaxing >The next five seconds was beautiful the Grea nanicked mid cu >Instead of tuning off the computer a pushed the monitor off the desk p getting cum every the tard wranglers e ended >He was transferred out of regular classes >But this was not the end of Wolfman Greg d)09:19.31 No.,631168892 250x213) 29. File: 14315458 10401 gif (1.5 MB We went a month without Greg shenanigans l even managed to sleep with the goth girl a couple of times outside of class >He didn't speak much, but we nicknamed him "8 Ball 8 Ball didn't take Greg's shit, except for letting him growl or whine once in a while the end of Junior year we thought we had heard the last of Wolfman Greg >None >l unch time l was sitting with the Goth Girl, Marian and her gaggle of dark brooding sisters tables were >We were talking about Poe when it happened >The doors to the tard building burst open was Greg I watch him sprint out, howling >8 Ball no where to be seen en Grea wondered around for a hit before singling out prev This noor shy gid named Marissa >He snuck up behind her >Oh God dher to the table >And pretended to mount her >He had his dick out and was rubbing it on the back Wing like a woll te cattered f her sweater This had to be the final straw >This went on for what felt like forever 8 Ball finaly ehowed un after getting Arby's >Greg was expelled after this and labeled a sex offender >Marissa dropped out >That was the end of Wolfman Grea for high school I have ONE more, this happened six months ago Anonymous 07/29/15(Wed)09.31:26 No.631171137 File: LTXeu.ipg (127 KB, 800x853) Greg was allowed to join our class. Not join me in hitting that sweet pale ass in the back, and n the hood of my old CRX. I can drop that green text if omvone's interoster Six months ago seeing Greg He had left my mind entirelv >Driving through my old town to visit my folks >Then I see it >is that? >No fucking way >Holy shit its Tucking Greg Lom in furkino aw that he's got a sweet scooter and I'm on a second had liter bike >Nearly rear end a taxi >He pulls up next to me sna lcan fucking smell him through my helmet l nearly puke >Manage to distance myself from him and get to my parents place >Decide to meet up with some old friends for a nde >Step outside fucking Vespa in the neiahbor's drive wav >No >lgnore it and go cruise w hours later sVesna still th >Please no >Greg lives next door to my folks now Facebook Grea's folks died and he inherted a large chunk of change >Bought the house next to my parents > Is a complete neet. 1/2 A File: 1427957849766 ong (97 K s 07/29/15(Wed)09:38:56 No.631172339M 460x470) 631171137 anything but browse the Internet probably and do Wolfman things >Try to not let this crush my soul and crawl into my old bunk bed to sleep for the night >As l'm drifting off to the though of making the Goth Girl of yesteryear swallow my cum and calling it st'e furking howling >God dammit Greg >My boner is ruined It's loud too ing howling keeps me up until 3am L finaly fell asleep Wake up the next moming 60 through the day with my folks a shell of my formor self >lt happens aqgain >The terror is replaced with rage no window This is it "Greal It's 11 o'clock at night! I have to >Slam window home tomorrow and I need sleep! SHUT THE FUCK UP" SFall asleep and leave the next moming >A few months later mom calls me The cops entered Greg's home due to a smell complaint >Crea was deod >I inadvertently got him to kill himself ut the bou tom don It's now an empty lot >But I, and hundreds of others still remember Wolfman Greg God speed, vou magnificent. early furry trash bastard. Wolf man Greg

#funny #lol #humor #memes #meme #memehumor #dank memes #funny pics #rolf #lmao #Anime #Apparently #an

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lickmeleclerc · 7 years ago

Text

|Me Before You| T.H au

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female reader

Summary: Y/n Clark couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling of being out of her element. She couldn’t fight the battle between what to say and what not to say. She would’t dare offend her new employer's son. The need to help her family since her father’s job loss kept her here. Tom Holland was a rather sarcastic fellow, who wouldn’t be in this state. But as his true colors are shown & Y/n becomes determined to show him that life is still lovable, feeling start to blossom.

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings: Based off the film Me Before You (hence the title) Tom is au as Will Trainer’s character so he is paralyzed from the waist down. I do not own any rights to the film or to the actors.

“Look at me please. Please look at me.” He whispers. You can feel the the vibrations of his chest as he speaks and the soft thud of his heart beat.

“I can’t.” Your voice cracks as the tears are already fastly cascading down your cheeks. You don’t want to move, you don’t want time to keep ticking along. All you want to think about is him. About the memories the last six months have brought with Tom. With the snarky remarks and the lazy days inside. You didn’t want to be in reality in the present but wanted to relive the past.

“Come on darlin. I want to see your face, even if it’s all red and blotchy.” He speaks again and a painful laugh falls from your lips as you sit up and let him see you. His brown eyes scan over your features and the pain in his chest, a different pain that what he’s felt ever since the accident. It’s an emotional pain he can’t bear. All he does is try to lean in closer toward you. He can’t do much but you know him well enough and lean in closing he gap. The kiss is soft and filled with love, almost making this situation worse. You know he loves you. And he knows too well how much you love him. Your soft cheeks touch his and you can feel the soft stubble coming back. The memory plays in your head when you first talked him into shaving, it was your first intimate moment with him. And you didn’t even know how important it’d become to you. You shake the sad thoughts and get lost in the kiss.

Tom Holland has never in his life met someone quite like you. So full of life and so eager to smile. Maybe it was the first meeting when he pulled his jaw weird and held his eyes wide open as he moaned like he was dying. His test he’d pulled on all the people his mother tried to hire. You didn’t look appalled just confused. And you still held a smile, even if it looked more painful to hold you did it. Just like you’re doing as you look at him right now, holding a smile even if you’d rather not.

Tom has never had a girl be so invested in his life, in keeping him alive than you have. When you waltzed in the room that day in what seemed like a costume more than an outfit he honestly found himself laughing. The horses spread across your attire held so many sarcastic comments but the joy in your eyes as you explained the day to him. He couldn’t say them. He went for you. Even when he could walk he hated walking into the stadium to bet on horses and sit for hours in the hot sun only for the chances to hardly be in his families favor.

When you showed up with the symphony tickets Tom realized he actually was taking a liking to the girl with colorful outfits who didn’t do much but work and spend time with her family. When you entreated the room that night an Harrison, his nurse, let out a wowza, he knew as soon as he laid his chocolate eyes on you he’d be falling fast. And he was right. The red dress laid beautifully on your figure and there was the 100 watt smile plastered on your face. He’d wanted to ask if your cheeks ever hurt from all the smiling.

“Loose the scarf.” He’d said trying to keep up his wall. He couldn’t be falling in Love he thought to himself.

“Tom Holland, only you would tell a girl how to wear a red dress.” You’d laughed and slid it from around your neck gently. In moments like this you weren’t being cocky or overly confident, it just didn’t register with you that four eyes were on you. The symphony was full when you arrived and Tom couldn’t fully enjoy himself from something pricking his neck. You’d discovered it’s a tag and without any scissors leaned up and bit the tag removing it. The look up surprise on Tom’s face had you chuckle.

“Thank god it wasn’t on your trousers.” You say as the show begins. Tom then realizes maybe you just don’t care what people think, you’re just truly you. And that is a lovable quality.

The wedding invitation may open on the table. Tom’s old work make was marrying his ex girlfriend. The girlfriend he’d pushed away after the accident. He’d invited to take you somewhere. A third date with Tom. The boy you couldn’t deny the feelings growing. As you determined to make his life so amazing he’d want to keep it, you agreed to go. While there he called you beautiful for the first time. A memory you’d always cherish.

“Why don’t you say you give me a whirl.” You surprise him with suggestion as you say gently on his lap. As he wheels to the dance floor you can help but laugh happily as he spins you in circles.

“Are they all looking on disgusted?” He asks with a laugh of his own. It’s deep in his belly and you can feel it’s a true laugh. You nod still laughing but not breaking eye contact wit him.

“Take me away, let’s go somewhere just you and I.” Another suggestion from your lips that shocks him. He didn’t think he could have a girl have feelings for him in this state. Maybe maybe for just a moment you’ve convinced him. That is until the next morning when you return from a night spent in a hotel he came down with a bad case of pneumonia. His fourth case within two years.

You’d planned for two weeks, you’d thought of all the worse case scenarios and even got Harrison on board for this holiday. The Indian Ocean Islands it was. The Holland’s agreed to it and even though they’ve never spoken it they appreciate all your efforts. If anyone could had done it, it would have been you. The holiday was lovely. Tom and you shared your first kiss. It was while a storm was heavy outside and you left the doors open to watch it. It was after a long day on the beach sunbathing. The next day he’d encouraged you to scuba dive. To try new things. And it was then both you and Tom stopped fighting your feelings. It was when Tom confessed about his plans to end his life.

“I know Tom.” You said simply smiling at him as you expected him to explain how he’d changed his mind.

“I gave my parents six months. And when I get back....I’m going to Switzerland.” He surprises you with your words. To hold a smile still would weigh too much. It dropped and tears held heavy in your eyes.

“No no no Tom.” Was all that would slip out. You clung to his chest and let the tears land on his shirt.

“I can’t give you what I should be able to Y/n. Hell I can’t even wipe your tears right now. I can’t vacation with you, I could never be what you deserve. You’ll miss out and I’ll only hold you back.” He tries to start you to understand. You pick up your head shaking it back and forth not caving. You could never agree with this.

“Y/n I can’t even do. God what I wish I could do to you right now, I can’t.” He speaks again after you kiss him softly. A small laugh leaves his lips they’re still close to yours and his hot breath fans across your face.

“No please.” You manage one last time as he continues to try and explain his decision.

At first you were mad. You wouldn’t talk to him or even look at him as you traveled back home. But after speaking with your sister she explained how wrong it would be if you weren’t by his side. He’d ask you come with him well on holiday but you couldn’t bare the thought. But that was past and now reality seeps in. You’re not in his flat or on holiday or at a symphony. You’re laying on his chest in Switzerland as it’s about to happen. As the steady heart beat you feel will soon stop and the love of your life won’t be here to love you back anymore. No more kisses, no more laughs, no more memories.

“I’m going to kidnap you.” You speak after pulling away from the kiss. The kiss that sparked so many thought. He smiles up at you and his heart swells. Y/n Clark always one to stay positive in the worst of situations. Always one to make jokes. Always one to still be able to smile while crying.

“Where will we go?” Tom questions wishing he could run his hand down your back to calm you down and wipe the endless tears from your eyes. He could even come to the conclusion of self loathing because he couldn’t do that for you, he can’t do anything for you. And that is what helps him to not change his mind. You don’t deserve this kind of life.

“Paris.” You answer. The one word sentence doesn’t need more detail. He knows the reference. As he squeezes his eyes shut he imagines the two of you sitting across from each other in those chairs that never sit level on the pavement. It’s hot out but there’s a nice breeze. As you both sip your cups of strong coffee and spread raspberry jam with unsalted butter on a fresh croissant. He’d find himself reaching a hand across the table to hold yours and all the pretty french girls trying to give him the eye he’d ignore. He’d only look at you with love and adoration and happiness. Even though in his mind he was facing you, he had no doubt your legs would be clad in the bumblebee striped tights. A smile is held on his face, his eyes closed. And that is how he spends his last moments. You in his arms, the feeling of your breath on his chest and the thought of Paris with you outside his favorite cafe.

A/N: Okay so this isn’t my best I just love this movie ok like I wish I wrote this movie tbh

Tagging Mutuals: @lovelyh0lland @spidersgeek @beautiful-holland @secretly-spider-man @spideykisses @cherryhollands @parkerstan

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divas-k · 6 years ago

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Dress to Oppress – Walls and Overalls

Today, we unravel the threads of time and tradition, and weave a new norm.

The dilemma of deciding what to wear is universal. But in an age where gender and sex are spectrums rather than definite lines, we must re-examine the stereotypes (‘tom-boy’, ‘slutty’, ‘sanskari’) we have woven with respect to the clothing choices of those around us. Furthermore, questions like “Who wears the pants in your relationship?” only deepen the scars of prejudice, and misguided notions of masculinity and/or power. Such erroneous judgments continue in assigning gender and/or sex to colours. While in the early 20th century, the trade publication Earnshaw’s Infants’ Department, mentioned that “pink, being a more decided and stronger colour, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.”, by the 1940s, the tide had turned altogether. However, regardless of this timeline, an earnest plea to the reader would be to leave the rainbow alone.

Then, there are those who advocate ideals of equality and freedom of choice, and admonish men wearing dresses (read Jaden Smith at prom), all in the same breath. Say, if a woman wore a tuxedo to her wedding, one would witness all dainty facades of acceptance and support flying off the shelves. Admittedly, open-mindedness is easier in theory than in practice, and hypocrisy a smoother path to traverse than honesty. The question is- are you willing to take the road less travelled?

Further, dear reader, recall the stunning, overexposed shots of testosterone-fueled, muscled men, armed with spears and shields, skin slick with sweat, clad in plumed helmets and fustanellas (a traditional Greek skirt) in Zack Snyder’s dramatic fictionalized retelling of the Battle of Thermopylae within the Persian Wars. Fixated as you may be on the seeming juxtaposition in the above description, of brave men wearing skirts, I shall clarify, that I speak of the box office success, ‘300’.

Moreover, consider the Scottish, who, in donning the kilt, were concerned with convenience and comfort for their male warriors and employed several practical uses of the garment- apart from shielding one’s body from nature and clothing one’s frame. The kilt could serve as a camping blanket, and was worn over a full-sleeved garment stopping below the waist (léine); loose-fitting, it enabled the wearer to make distant, long marches with agility and to wade through rivers. The upper half could be worn as a cloak over the shoulder, or brought up over the head for protection against the weather. Now, as queer (in more ways than one) as it may seem for some, to witness warriors donning an article of clothing reserved for the ‘weaker’ sex, when you come to think of it, it may be wiser and more comfortable for males to don skirts and females to wear pants, for obvious anatomical reasons.

Having said that, one should be free to clothe themselves as they see fit, regardless of the anatomy of their body. This free will is embodied in Megan Fox’s parenting style, whereby she abstains from enforcing stereotypical dress-codes for her children; in conversation with Jimmy Kimmel, she mentioned how her son, Noah, likes to wear dresses sometimes. Parents all over the world should take notes from the Transformers star, who said, “…there are no rules- you can be whatever you want to be in my house!” Moreover, skirts have made their way into men’s fashion through celebrities; Jared Leto, David Beckham, David Bowie, Jaden Smith, Kanye West and Vin Diesel have all worn skirts proudly.

Why, though, must we view these developments as achievements to be proud of, rather than commonplace occurrences that are treated with normalcy? I suppose we have, indeed, come full circle- where once, Luisa Capetillo and Katherine Hepburn went against the tide and donned trousers, the garment of revolt (the former went to jail for the supposed ‘crime’, though charges were dropped later), the dawn of the twenty first century brings with it the campaign for men to freely wear ‘feminine’ clothes. This is baffling, juxtaposed with the fact that cultures across the world started out with simple, flowy, dress-like garments meant for both the sexes - from the Roman toga, to the Indian lungi, and the Japanese kimono (to name but a few) - which were differentiated and altered into gender-specific clothes. Having said that, the response to the present hue and cry for gender-neutral clothing has not been met satisfactorily; despite the promise of equality, the unisex garment has essentially been of a ‘masculine’ style. Needless to say, we have miles to go in this area.

But clothes aren’t where it all ends; cosmetics form an integral component of fashion trends and the way one wears them (or doesn’t, depending on one’s preferences) reflects a person’s projection of themselves as much as their clothes do. Men have found their footing in the cosmetics industry, debunking the myth that makeup can’t be ‘macho’. This comes amid a larger investigation into traditional gender boundaries in fashion and beauty, alongside the growth of internet-famous beauty fanatics who have built followings via social media. Take, for instance CoverGirl’s latest face, James Charles, 17, a high school senior from Bethlehem, N.Y., with nearly 650,000 followers on Instagram and over 90,000 subscribers on his YouTube channel. Following suit, Maybelline unveiled their first ever male model, Manny Gutierrez, the 25-year-old “beauty boy”, with a whopping 3 million followers on Instagram and 2.1 million YouTube subscribers.

And then there is the eventful history of high-heels. From Medieval Persia to Carrie Bradshaw, the elevated shoe has come a long way. Initially donned by Persian noblemen as riding shoes, the heel enabled a steadier stance so that the rider could shoot his arrow more effectively while standing up in the stirrups. European royals took notice when Persian monarch, Shah Abbas went to tour European courts around the 1500s. And so the Persian style shoes were adopted by the aristocracy who felt it lent their demeanor a masculine edge, until it was eventually taken over by women.

Cut to the present, where more men are adopting the style originally meant for them, dispelling invisible boundaries and gender norms. In 2014, Yanis Marshall auditioned for the talent show Britain’s Got Talent; the part French, part British dancer combined his passion for dance and his undying love for high heels, and along with his two friends Arnaud and Mehdi, won the hearts of everyone who was watching. Sure-footed (in 6-inch heels, no less) and sassy as can be, the trio stunned the crowd and received nothing but adoration and respect from the judges, with their up-beat and bold moves on numbers by the Spice Girls and Beyoncé, among others. When asked why he dances in high heels, Yanis replied with the same answer he has always uttered, i.e.- “Why not?”

And truly, that is a question we must all ask ourselves. Why can’t men wear high heels? Why must make-up be withheld from the masculine? Why should women worry about being looked down upon for wearing a tuxedo instead of a dress? Can the walls we see around us be crossed and broken? More importantly, who built them to begin with? In part, we all are culprits, and these walls stand testament to our crime. Every naysayer has placed a brick and a dollop of mortar. It seemed a small contribution at the time- but then, no individual water drop holds itself responsible for the flood.

And while, as a general rule, things are easier to break than build- these walls are standing exceptions. We must all resolve to make a small indent, to chisel away yet another bit of prejudice, and to bury away our notions, in order to break the walls that separate us from each other, and ourselves. For, there are those amongst us who do not identify as either male or female- everything is not, after all, simply black or white. But this human tendency, an obsession almost, to put things into neat, tiny little boxes, has imprisoned some of our own; the breaking of these walls may be the first step for some of us to see ourselves in the clear light of day and do justice to who we truly are.

After all, walls are only so good as long as they protect and support us. But when they begin separating us from reality, and each other, it’s time to start considering cutting a few doors into them. And even if we don’t find the courage to cross those doors immediately, at least we’d have let in a bit of light from the other side.

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dresstive · 3 years ago

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Trending Bridal Lehenga Designs to Choose in Wedding Season

A woman's wedding is one of the most important days of her life. This new chapter of life entails marrying the guy of their dreams, a significant occasion full of excitement, exquisite feasts, and celebrations. Aside from that, planning the proper dress, including bridal lehenga trends 2022, jewellery, and cosmetics, is crucial for a wedding.

The bridal industry has witnessed one of the most stunning shifts. But one thing is sure: the bride will be wearing the most admirable attire in the entire venue. Brides should dress in a way that leaves guests dumbfounded.

For centuries, brides have worn lehenga choli or ghagra garments at weddings. You read that correctly! A lehenga choli is a statement of beauty and pride, and no bride wants to be a minimalist during their marriage and lehenga choli's maximalist appearance has made it a popular choice for weddings.

Every bride wants to look and feel her best at all wedding ceremonies. Bridal gowns are typically embroidered, decorated, or patterned lehengas. Here, we give your insight into the fascinating selection of bridal lehenga designs and trends in 2022 that you should consider before purchasing. Here are a few latest bridal designs to vamp up the elegance for this wedding season.

1. Traditional Red Bridal Lehenga

Nothing tops the traditional red Indian designer bridal lehenga. Since the beginning, brides have been drawn to the colour red. The most popular colour blend is red and gold. This is the lehenga to wear if you want to maintain the desi flavour of your wedding.

The complex zari work is done in several hues of red, and you can choose from a range of patterns, including ones with heavy embroidery or embellishments. If you want to give this classic look a modern touch, go all-red and select a designer red bridal lehenga with redwork.

2. Double Duppata Lehengas

In this trend, a long, trailing head veil in a contrasting colour is topped over the lehenga dupatta to lend beauty and drama to a non-traditional ethnic ensemble. This was inspired by Manish Malhotra's latest bridal lehenga designs collection, which includes wearing a long, floor-length dupatta over a lehenga and a separate chunni over the head.

3. Bridal Lehenga with Belt

Add a modern twist to your classic lehenga with this season's must-have belt. A belt keeps your dupatta in place, drawing attention to your waist. So show off your curves with a fabric belt or a jewellery belt. You can match your belt to the style of your bridal lehenga or contrast it with your shirt.

4. Anarkali Lehenga Choli

The flared design of the Anarkali lehenga choli is traditional, gorgeous, and simply a monument to beauty. The choli is a form-fitting garment with half or full sleeves ornated and rich with works. The lehenga is embroidered in gold zari with blooms, motifs, and regal embellishments. The dupatta that comes with it completes the look and, once again, is lavishly decorated and embroidered.

5. Printed Lehengas

This style of trendy lehenga is worth trying because it looks stunning in images. Minimalist bridal lehenga trends for 2022 include floral motifs, hand block prints, and intricate digital engravings on comfy fabrics. Such unique and bright printed designs will set you apart from the rest of the Instagram brides.

6. Heavy Bridal Lehenga

Heavy bridal lehengas designs come in various colours such as ivory, gold, silver or grey. The golden bridal lehenga is a popular choice since it complements Indian skin tones. A golden bridal lehenga design might be modest or completely striking this season. Gold complements various colours, including red, green, and beige. The ideal combination, however, is thought to be gold and ivory. You can also go all-gold and add a splash of colour with jewellery.

7. Multicolored Embroidery Lehengas

Colours are used to create a colour palette that matches the vibrant enthusiasm of such a wonderful day. Choose a multicoloured embroidered lehenga skirt or blouse to add intricacy to your bridal outfit. You can experiment with delicate pearl jewellery to give this colourful outfit a royal aspect and make the most of these trendy modern bridal lehenga styles of 2022.

8. Cape Top Bridal Lehengas

Bridal lehenga choli designs with capes are popular this season. It is the ideal combination of elegance and drama. A cape can be worn over your blouse or draped over your dupatta. A cape can also be ordered separately. Put it on. Take charge of it. And let it flow with the wind's colours.

Conclusion

Shopping for a wedding can be hectic, with various designs in various colours, fabrics, and shapes. Still, you can thoroughly shop and grab your best wedding from the latest wedding designer lehenga collections for this auspicious big day with the above designs. Online shopping websites have done the act of shopping enjoyable and more intuitive. Whether you like a classic or unusual look, a stunning lehenga choli accentuates your inner and outer beauty and is a must-have for your wedding. Adorn yourself in these bridal attire designs, and let your guests see the queen within you.

#bridal lehenga #designer bridal lehenga #designer lehenga #lehenga choli #embroidery lehengas #printed lehengas #duppata lehengas #traditional lehenga

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tellywoodtrash · 6 years ago

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the great indian dysfunctional family ep 2 lb

(previous)

... the place the show is set in is called “kannuri”? i thought it was in coonoor, the way samar was talking about landslides... afaik there’s no such place as “kannuri”. why choose a fictional place?

ok flashing back to 6 years ago. addu and nandu are playing truth or dare. is there really a need for a bottle to be spun when there’s just the two of you?

addu’s dropping some facts/not-so-subtle hints about bisexuality.

they have chits ready with the dares written? this is faaaaaaaar more organized a truth or dare game than i’ve ever participated in

of course it dares nandu to kiss her opponent. if addu made the chits, i have a feeling ALL of them say that.

aw, it’s quite the sweet tiny peck. though slightly unwilling on nandu’s end.

seems like a bulb has gone off in addu’s head, the way she’s smittenly grinning.

nandu talks about how she can’t wait to fall in love and addu looks like this:

cut to addu in the present, sobbing her heart out. oh baby girl.

sonali and premlata are bonding by looking at old photos. awwwwwwwww yissssssss this is the relationship i’m here forrrrrrrrrrrr.

sonali is so damn cool man. she just oooozes charm and wit.

a baby photo of addu (and premlata mentioning nandu) makes sonali recall last night.

oh no. she’s going to talk to addu. behen aapne bas kal hi entry maari hai. should you be trespassing this quickly?

she’s easing into the topic quite sensitively though. so maybe she is the right person to have this conversation.

aaaaaaaaand just as she’s breaching the topic, geeta’s here.

slight afra tafri and double meaning talk as sonali encourages addu to “wear whatever she likes” and not fear of people’s judgement, before being pulled off by geeta to some parlour apt.

chachiji, i know you mean well, but this advice is just going to make little addu here crash and burn.

samar’s veryyyyyyy chipper this morning. lol it’s a little strange for me to see sobti SOOOOOO smiley and happy.

aw he’s talking about the kids so fondly. does he have a little baby fever himself?

sonali’s tryyyyyyying to breach the topic about how addu’s “different” and might not just want to settle for an arranged marriage.

ugh samar, that was a sexist thing to say. and just when i was beginning to like you so much.

A+ to sonali for calling him out on it and shutting him down. i don’t know if i want to be her or if i’m just in love with her.

aw mridul is dancing to radha teri chunari. and all the ladies (geeta, premlata, the baai whose name i still don’t know) are lovingggggggg it. as am i. toooo cute for words.

ofc vikram shuts it down. ugh.

great. some realllllllllllll toxic masculinity being thopofied on that poor tiny baby. he looks 5 or 6, at most? ugh, honestly, men are the fucking worst.

is the baai purposely interrupting repeatedly in order to diffuse the argument and protect geeta?

wow, he has all these opinions on which song mridul should dance, but he hasn’t learnt sign language to communicate with him. seriously fuck you vikram.

i’d assumed that geeta was a long-suffering silent type, but i’m very glad she’s not.

this child is truly adorableeeeeee.

wow, even samar known sign language. (even though he said he’s meeting mridul for the first time???)

this just goes to show that vikram’s an exceptionally shit dad.

ugh. too much cute.

aw, what mridul signed to samar was that he really likes sonali’s laugh and was practicing laughing like her. pls excuse me, i’m sobbing.

also yes, sonali deserves this much love and adoration, if not more.

oh samar learnt sign language while in the army.

now even sonali is attempting to communicate with him with sign language. not very well, but she’s trying!

well-meaning but kinda insensitively framed questions about mridul’s muteness from sonali. i think geeta’s a little hurt.

also she seems a little envious of how loving samar and sonali’s relationship is. sigh.

aaaaaaaand everyone’s off for the night’s festivities. in shaky sharon.

but i notice premlata is missing. just like she was for last night’s event. why?

sonali is me. only priority and incentive to get out of the house is khaana.

what was that slight moment between sonali and geeta at the song (babuji zara dheere chalo)? felt like an inside joke but.....????

even vikram wants to know. but we don’t find out.

ouff again assi vele? ek hi gaana kitni baar???? there are other party jams you know?????

nandu’s dad (pappu) is realllllly smitten with sonali. almost slightly inappropriately so?

i find almost all men inappropriate and suspicious these days, so it could be just me. sonali seems fine with it.

meanwhile addu’s on the hunt for nandu. oh girl, no.

vikram’s sharing army waale stories with some junior. ugh idc about you man. gimme more samar/sonali/addu.

vikram didn’t appreciate his “can you believe men these days get mani/pedis?????” bs interrupted by geeta.

and samar and sonali.

sonali notices geeta’s hand lingering on hot junior’s arm a little toooo long while she’s making introductions. oh boy. sonali maybe you should STOP noticing so much. just for your own sake.

no but geeta really does seem to have some kinda special equation with hunky junior.

vikram why the fuck are you so bitter about samar’s profession? honestly.

samar’s good-naturedly asking him to maybe come visit him sometime at his restaurant, but there’s a real bite to the way he’s saying it.

aaaaaaaand addu’s throwing back drinks. oh honey.

sigh.

ugh some gossipy aunty is asking geeta if she thinks nandu and her fiance have already “done it” coz look at her “glow”. WHY ARE YOU OLDS SO GROSS??????/ JFC.

aaaaand she’s now sharing about how her husband made her “glow” only twice this year. and once was on rakshabandhan. which is creepy as hell. you need to stop talking NOW, aunty.

ugh anyone with seeing eyes can see that vikram cannot get his head out of his ass and look beyond himself, i hardly think he’s making geeta “glow”.

okay so vikram and nandu’s dad just seem to be best friends. so phew, thank god, addu isn’t RELATED to nandu.

two (?) drinks in, addu’s here in nandu’s room and staring at her plaintively as she gets ready. oh baby girl.

nandu’s pretending like nothing’s happened. and asking for help tucking in a mic below her lehenga. oh nandu. why??? you know how she feels about you.

oh great. she’s found a hickey on nandu. ohhhhhhh boy.

aaaaaaaand they’re fighting.

fuck. don’t tell me is beech mein the mic gets turned on and broadcasts to the whole crowd outside.

mridul’s here to dance to radha (in a cuteass little anarkali type outfit) and vikram isn’t happy. but thankfully keeps mum other than a brief disapproving glance at geeta.

ohhhhhhh boy. the dj is fucking with the console and the mic is nowwwwww on. FUCK. DUMBASS DJ.

SKDJFHDSKJFHKDSJFHKDSJFHKDSJFHDKSJ GIRLS PLS NO AAAAAAAAAH I’M DYING OF MICHMICHI

FUCKING DJ CAN YOU FUCKING GO BACK TO PLAYING RADHAAAAAAA WHY IS THIS STILL ON????????

AND THE WHOLE CROWD IS JUST LISTENING INTENTLY INSTEAD OF TURNING IT OFF BY GOD KYA BESHARAM LOG HAIN.

addu’s saying everyone knows about them, including nandu’s dad. is that why vikram arranged nandu’s wedding?

aaaaand nandu just broke it all off calling it “a phase”. sigh. poor addu.

oh boy. nandu’s walking downstairs smiling resplendently. oh girl. kisne kaha tha mic itni jaldi lagaane ko??

lmao samar’s face. (is he flashing back to what sonali was trying to say in the car this morning and joining the dots?)

aaaaaaand both the girls know that everyone knows.

#the great indian dysfunctional family #tgidf lbs #episode liveblogs

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sutdrp · 7 years ago

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SUtD Seeks Star-Crossed Lovers, BEIC, Missionaries, Teachers, & More

Site Name and Link: Sufficient Unto the Day Site Genre: Historical Site info: April thru May. Summer 1797. The British possess the glorious bustle of Visakhapatnam which nestles in the state of Andhra Pradesh in India. The French and Sultanate lurk to regain the hold over the city while 19th century looms ahead. Which side will you choose? Your name: Tabs Contact info: Reach out via on site want ads & their OPs, or to the site staff in PM or on Discord. Role(s) requested:

Wedding Season

Site Event related want ads

Wedding Season is in full swing within Vizag and all across the state of Andhra Pradesh! Some say this occurrence of auspicious time for arrangements is as sudden as an unexpected loss of a star from heaven. Others feel it was an ordained hour, only waiting to be discovered by the clever. With every match comes a benefit. Will it be the joy of lovers? Will it be the hope of new alliance in families? Perhaps you come merely for the business of the thing -- new resources, new political matches, better futures through the age old art of marriageable pawns.

The following adoptables feature a variety of pick ups! Will you be a member of British or European colonial society? A BEIC company man or a member of the military looking for adventure? Perhaps you come from the Nizam’s court in Hyderabad looking to stretch the influence of family and court. Are you among the higher castes looking to form alliances with anti-colonial factions? Take a character. Choose a destiny. See where you stand!

The Colonials of Andhra Pradesh

Alexander James Cathcart, age 50 (ish), Rufus Sewell or Pierce Brosnan Scottish, merchant, adventurer, opportunist IC Connections: Kamil Azrak(son), Caroline Newbury(daughter), BEIC, possibly Little Palace

An adventurer at heart, Alexander has many stories to tell. He is a Scotsman of Lanarkshire ilk, his family's trade rooted in the Levant company from the 1750s. Alexander, although his Scot's accent is thick, has never seen much of Scotland, nor does he feel homesick for his country. Instead, he is a man who always pushes on and forward, seeking out new pleasures and treasures across the globe. This is one of the reasons why he is in India. He wants to seek his fortune.

But he has left something behind. He is a man of secrets, and although his family rarely talk of his past, Alexander thinks of it often. In the 1760s in Syria, Alexander had a love affair with a Muslim woman, Taruh Azrak. They escaped. They hid. They loved. They had pushed all boundaries. One boundary was pushed too far, and Taruh fell pregnant with his child, soon to be his only son, Kamil. With fear hot on his heels and prospects dying, the Scot fled to East India to join the BEIC, where he picked up an assortment of trades. Currently, his eye has been drawn to the trade of opium. Alexander is an opportunist, a good humoured man and with a heavy heart of guilt. He is currently married and has a daughter, Caroline (soon to be adopted by Livie), and as for his other child? He is right in Visakhapatnam, looking for him. Little do they both know they are like one another - they are men who seek adventure, who fear and relish every step along the way.

For more details, particularly ideas for future plots, or if interested, see Alexander’s wanted here!

Lucinda Camden, age Early 20s, FC Open Society Daughter, Engaged to Reginald Oaks, Schemer, Social Queen IC Connections: BEIC (Connected Family), Anglo-Indian/British Society, Featured Bride to be in "The Camden and Oaks Betrothal Party" The pearl of her parent's world and everything a well brought up British woman should be, Lucinda Camden has lacked for nothing while growing up under the auspices of colonial rule. Her father is a high ranking official within the Honourable Company. Her mother was an exceptional catch, arranged while they were young so that her dowry would come soundly into his pocket. This paired with company business has made the Camden family so wealthy that they can afford to have their noises thrust up into the air. Lucinda's is so high up it is amazing she can see down it at all. But she doesn't let the world know that. Every presentation is the perfect hostess, the modest maiden, the cleverness and prettiness to just the right point. Her goal in life is to not only marry Reginald Oaks, but to aspire to the heights of Waltair society just as they did in Chowringhee, Bombay enclave, to the point of owning the rights of entry. She keeps many secrets, none closer than the fact her betrothed is engaged in illegal activities to increase his fortune. How much of their love is for show? Reginald Oaks, age Mid-to-Late 20s, FC Open BEIC Cavalry Officer, Engaged to Lucinda Camden, False Star, Smuggler IC Connections: BEIC Military (Cavalry Officer, Rank Open), BEIC (Connected Family), Anglo-Indian/British Society, featured in "The Camden and Oaks Betrothal Party" The most dashing man that has ever ridden on a horse now has come to Vizag, by way of the colonial enclave of Waltair. To hear his fiance speak of it, there is nothing this man wouldn't do for his company, his country, God, or king. The consummate gentleman, he exudes charm, humor, wit, and humility. A gentleman just never be too boastful. He always has a care for the ladies and is even seen as fair in his dealings with the native heathens. His family has long been vested in the Company, especially via a military tradition. So this, paired with the Camden's civil service, made them stars in Chowringhee. Now, with a promotion on the rise he is set to become one here. A wonderful bride. A grand career. What more could a man want? More money to pay off a secret list of debts that could outweigh his own inherited fortune because of his penchant for gambling. How does one get such funds? Smuggling opium, tea, and whatever else he can get over sea and hill. Nathaniel Ainsworth, age 17-18, FC Open Son, Ainsworth Heir, American IC Connections: Yazdin Sarbh, Main Plot Feature in “Fires At Midnight”

Nathaniel is the only child of Sir James and Alice Ainsworth. Thus, he is the heir to the Ainsworth fortune. The fortune is rooted in the American tobacco trade, but his father had turned the wheel and diversified to spices not long before the American War of Independence. Connections are strong through money and blood. and a young Nathaniel is still finding his feet as the future head of the Ainsworth household. He has a love-hate relationship with India. The heat troubles him and he is very often homesick. However Nathaniel is smitten by the young Parsi woman Yazdin Sarbh. Unlike his sweetheart, Nathaniel lacks courage, and his desire for Yazdin rocks his confidence in what means to be an Ainsworth. Does he have roots or wings? Nathaniel is described as a strong young man with strong features. His hair is fair to light brown and he has light eyes.

He is featured in “Fires at Midnight” as an NPC character alongside Yazdin Sarbh. His background with Yazdin is still a mystery. Perhaps you can pave their past as well as their future?

Edward Oxford, age 26, Christian Slater 2nd Son of an Earl, Brother, Uncle IC Connections: Nicholas & Catherine Oxford, British Nobility, British Society

Younger brother of Nicholas Oxford. Being the younger one allows him to be more free and careless. Like Nicholas, Edward is well mannered and educated; Oxford University graduate. However, his heart is set on a certain English Rose named Mary Jane. Careless and Free; and at times immature. Edward is loyal to his older brother and to his family. He is close to Nicholas and will seek his counsel where required. He can also be a flirt when it suits him. Outside of this, character is open to be created as seen fit. For more details, particularly ideas for future plots, or if interested, see Oxford family wanted here!

George William Smyttan the Younger, age 27, FC Open Rogue Son & Brother, BEIC Navy, Navy Position Upto Player IC Connections: Smyttan Family, BEIC, BEIC Navy, British Society

What his chosen profession within the Navy is, is up to the player. He is the eldest son, true, but not the most responsible nor a totally serious man. He's chosen a life of hedonism when he is not playing at being a functional adult within the ranks of the company. If interested, or for further details, see Smyttan Family wanted here!

The Natives of Andhra Pradesh

Yazdin Sarbh, age 17-18, FC Open Daughter, Parsi IC Connections: Nathaniel Ainsworth, Main Plot Feature in “Fires At Midnight”

Yazdin is the second youngest sister of the Sarbh family and the love interest of English-born Nathaniel Ainsworth. She is Parsi-born and a child of the Zoroastrian faith. Although described as adventurous with a childlike streak by her family, Yazdin faces the world with bravery and ambition. The world is her canvas, and her path is unknown. Will she find a future with her sweetheart Nathaniel, or will she follow her family’s principles and marry a Parsi? She is described as a dainty young woman with a curvaceous frame. Her hair is a black-brown which springs into loose ringlets.

She is featured in “Fires at Midnight” as an NPC character, alongside Nathaniel Ainsworth. How Yazdin and Nathaniel met is still a mystery. What is their story? What is in store for them?

British East India Company

Soldiers, Medical Officers, Marines & Civil Servants

These are the men who take up the call to keep broad and long the reach of the British Empire through the Honorable British East India Company and the Bombay Marines. From the top ranking officer to the lowest ranking one, from the long careered civil servant to the man just beginning his adventure, there is a place for everyone! Will you march over tropical climes, rivers, and through deserts? Perhaps you are a man who seeks to be a civil servant risen from a mere clerk. This arm of trade doubles also as the governing body, keeping Visakhapatnam free from the grasps of the French, The Maratha Empire, and the Nizam's reach from Hyderabad. [note: some positions for BEIC didn’t post; can’t figure out why it wouldn’t so please visit the on-site want ad linked for reference to see others.]

Infantry, Cavalry, Artillery, Medical Officers

Representative of the military forces of the Honorable Company's occupation, keeping both the trade ways open, any competition on the field at bay, and performing duties as assigned. All ranks are available as well for original character applications, from the lowest cadet to captain and beyond — unless stated otherwise.

Studious career-military man residing in India for 2 years. Newly appointed to the Waltair Cantonment. 30s. FC Open. (Field Marshal)

Dissolute clergyman’s son banished to the BEIC military by his father via purchased commission in hopes he’ll shape up. 20s. FC Open. (2d Lieutenant. Commissioned Officer)

Tireless Sepoy with a dark past. Mid-30s to 40s. FC Open. (Sepoy is a native position)

Surgeons - Infantry, cavalry, and artillery. Also two in the Waltair hospital under the supervision of Army Master Surgeon, Dr. Smyttan.

Assistants/Apothecaries - Several in three branches(infantry, cavalry, artillery), and four in Waltair Hospital.

Civil Servants

Not everyone is meant to march in step or ride the waves, but that doesn't mean these men don't have a part to play. Everyone from clerks to tradesmen, chaplains to writers, naturalists who study the local plants and animals to the natives who are employed as language teachers, judges, and bailiffs. Featured are more direct company roles related to trade, but there are room for naturalists, botanists, chaplains, artists, and more!

Writer: Unnamed. Introvert looking for a challenge. 20s. FC Open.

Tide Waiter: Unnamed. Hardworking, good with numbers and organization. 20s-40s. FC Open. Could potentially be useful in the BEIC connected Warehouse Raid & Treasures from the Sea plots.

Chaplain(s): Unnamed BEIC Civil Servant. Available Position(s). FCs Open. IC Connections: BEIC, British Society, St. Christopher’s By the Sea These are the missionaries that end up working with the BEIC even though they may get some hassle from the Company itself. Some became part of the BEIC due to their skills as translators.

Warehouse Manager: Unnamed BEIC Civil Servant. Available Position. FC Open. IC Connections: BEIC, British Society, The Campbells(Kendrew & Liliana), Featured in “Camden & Oaks Betrothal Party” 30s. Scotsman who tends to be a little paranoid, especially about his secret gambling debts, who is having a rough time at work given the recent incidents and the rumors circulating that he might lose his job. His wife, Margaret, spends a lot of money trying to keep up with society adding to his stress. Pre-requisite: Involvement in the Warehouse Raid & Treasures from the Sea plots as the position of this character is important in the plot.

Bombay Marines

The men who crew the famous East Indiamen ships serve the purpose of protecting the trade routes by maintaining armed ships for trade and escort, sailing the seas and rivers. They are also used for mapping coastlines and rivers all across India and Asia, while serving as an additional guard force for coastlines, harbors, and docksides. Climb the rigging as a seamen while learning the ropes to advance in standing. Cook a meal, keep the candles in stock, or pray that the storm never touches the sails. Join the wardroom officers in making decisions, or look over the long night as a member of the watch. All positions and ranks are open though those featured below are not all that’s available. Currently there are 3 ships in play: Calcutta Star, Princess of India, & King’s Glory with current priority given to filling roles aboard Calcutta Star. Below is listed available positions.

[For some reason the Bombay Marines list won’t paste in here, so for that listing please see the link below labeled ‘please reference’ to go to the want ad on-site.] If interested in these wanted, and to learn more on positions, please reference and/or post in THIS thread. For a full reference, please visit following links for a complete list of offices and definitions: BEIC & Bombay Marines.

The Pricha & St. Laurence Household

Family & Servants

The home of Master Pricha, Noble and Private Diplomat, for Siam and the Yorkshire Fellowship. His wife, Madame Pricha, who servers as his translator, adviser, and holds sway over the Fellowship. Their high ranking servants are often Fellowship members, with rich histories of their own, including more open-ended adoptable choices and involved backstories to fill in and create in deeper contexts. The family members range from understanding the deep activities of their kinsmen, to participating in them, and having secrets of their own. The Master and Madame are used as private diplomats/cultural consultants by the East India Company, with other kinsmen listed having a history of Company roles.

Ram Pricha, 22, Daniel Wu(Suggested; FC must be Asian) Brother to Aurelius Pricha IC Connections: Pricha & St. Laurence Family, Features in "We Shatter"

Ram is very much the signature Siamese in the belief of 'sanuk' (playfulness) and 'mai pen rai' (no worries) when he is at home with his brother and family. He is very good at utilizing his youthfulness to put people at ease and let them underestimate him and his ability to read a situation. In a family of diplomats who served many kings, Ram learned fast. Where his eldest brother is stern and holds a neutral expression, Ram makes use of raised eyebrows, harmless jokes, and insightful revelations. He is very good at several fighting forms, most particularly sparring with Aurelius and Claramae in Krabi krabong fighting (this comes into play for a later plot, too). He speaks Thai, but has quite a bit fluency in Chinese and Hindi, with some broken English. I have very weak knowledge of Thai language, so this can be played with English writing, seriously.

His hair is dark, his body is wiry in build and strength. The middle names and the PB (Asian!) are up to the player, as well as the rest of the personality, history, quirks, and other various secrets. While Aurelius and Ram both have a shared family and some shared history, Aurelius was gone a lot so that leaves a lot of gaps in Ram's history to fill in up until this point.

Character sought by Kay of SUtD, being advertised on her behalf so please reach out to her on the RP site via the on site want ad.

Lord Byron Gregory St. Laurence I, age 52-56, Tim Roth(Suggested) Uncle, Brother of Richard St. Laurence, Retired Navy, Yorkist, Architect, Land Surveys IC Connections: Pricha & St. Laurence Family, Yorkshire Fellowship, BEIC, Helvetius Intrepid Society(possibly)

The story of the St. Laurence brothers is as wide as a net can cast. Why? A father was gifted with bright, brilliant young men. Other members of the family took keen interest in one another’s children. It wasn’t just rank and position they cared about, but education, preserving lands and titles for future generations, and continuing the tradition of excellence that their name belied. Where his elder brother Richard took to the Royal Navy and advisement on ships for military and mercantile use within the British East India Company all of his days? Byron took to the other tradition of their father after his service in the navy concluded due to injury: land surveys, architecture, and civic improvement. He is a voice for beautifying London to meet the coming of the new age, and a voice sought after for projects in the colonies to bring a touch of Europe to the far off lands. Naturally, this is wrapped in his advisement on manners to which he is sought after on. He goes to India again not only to visit his niece and meet the family he has not seen in some time, but to also take up a post among the Yorkists as he once had in Bombay. He was one of those men who gathered in chairs over dusty books on a dusty day. He also finds himself among the deeper end of the equation, with a specialty for cracking codes, a skill he shares with his sister-in-law by Richard, Liadan. The oddity of his niece’s life choices only amuses him, with his own wife being born in the East Indies, the daughter of descended rich gentry who purchased a peerage. It is said there are a few shades of tawny in her lineage, too! Open to writer figuring out the specific style of his BEIC service, and if he seeks to resume any such posts again in his later years!

Lady Katherine Anne Dennery, age 30-32, Clemence Poesy "Kitty Anne", Cousin, Poet, Yorkist, Widow, Bluestocking IC Connections: Pricha & St. Laurence Family, Possible Long-lost Love(if interested), The Yorkshire Fellowship, Yorkist’s Club

If ever there was a woman in the family that Claramae was close to other than her own mother and great-grandmother? It was Katherine Anne, or “Kitty Anne” as she was always affectionately called. Claramae was never afraid to laugh with her, or tell her the things she studied or longed for. She has longings, too, having treated Claramae as something of a sister due to the fact her own sister died when early childhood was just coming to a close. The epitome of the sweet, gentle woman of the day, it hides a much deeper sense of self. While much of her light can be kept under a bushel? Katherine is quite intelligent, benefitting from the family’s model of tutelage extended to young women, even cousins of differing names. She has several hobbies, including a love affair with Italian poetry and art.

Claramae’s placid face is also no bother to her, for she can be very similar at times, nothing overstated or understated in expression. She came to Calcutta with her husband who died of cholera. With her mourning at its end, she elected to continue on in life’s adventure, turning correspondence into nearness by taking up residence alongside her cousin in Waltair. She represents a story of colonial womanhood, being brave enough to take the journey and to bring those aspects of society that women take with them.

For the possible long-lost love connection part mentioned in IC Connections, and general plans for it, contact Tabs of SUtD.

Sir Edward "Iron Hand" St. Laurence, 29-35 , Eddie Redmayne Fighter, Friend, Cousin, Yorkist, Senior Merchant IC Connections: Pricha & St. Laurence Families, BEIC, Yorkshire Fellowship, Mystery of the Warehouse Raids(BEIC Plot)

Edward has had many adventures in life, the extent of which are waiting for his writer to fill in. However, what can be said of the son of Byron Gregory is that he had a terrible habit for getting into trouble until it damn near cost him his life. What it cost him was the full function of his hand without mechanical assists. Though he had dreams of a military career, youthful folly and the adaptability of his hand rather changed the course of those stars. He is particularly close to the St.Laurence siblings though they did not see one another near as much as they would have liked due to the business of their fathers. He was a dear friend of Claramae's brother James Paul, if not second only to both Claramae and Aurelius themselves.

A legacy of James' brilliance and Claramae's cleverness with math and parts lives on in how his damaged left hand is able to move with the help of the a metal hand assist whose rings he keeps oiled so one does not here him creaking about. He turns instead to India to recover a bit of ailing health and participate in the growing of his coffers to make up for the debt to the family holdings in his house. A good man by nature, he has taken hold to the Orient with a great fever and when he is not overseeing things as a Senior Merchant for the British East India Company? He studies Eastern Religion and Art, to which he has plans to take up one of them for his own. Your choice of which particular religion he fancies to practice, between Hinduism and Buddhism, and which ones he enjoys studying as part of the local/Asian culture.

If interested in these wanteds, the Yorkshire Fellowship, or the Yorkist’s Club please post in THIS thread.

The Leveque and Obray Family

A family of Academics, Priests, Missionaries, and Travelers, representing both French and Chinese cultural, religious, and missional history by utilizing the last years of the Jesuits, French Foreign Missions, and the French Revolution. Also seeking teachers and servants for the L'école Leveque (read forum description), a dame school overseen and run by this Catholic family. This family is also connected with the local Catholic church and the parish activities of St. Christopher's by the Sea

Amiee Leveque, age 28, Zoey Deschanel(Suggested) Sister, Aunt, Widow, Tutor, Teacher IC Connections: Leveque Family, L'école Leveque Dame School, Main Plot Feature in “Burning Day”

The oldest of the Leveque sisters born outside of Paris like her father, Barthelemy, was, half-sister is a term that would never do to describe Aimee's relationship to Eirian. The two might as well have shared the same womb! Her mother died at a young age, leaving her father heart broken. Throwing himself in to his work, she became his connection to the world at large, his littlest adventurer, his companion. While having no memories of her own mother, she lacked for nothing under the love and guidance of her stepmother, Ebrain. Memories of life in Wales and France are with her, though the great majority of her story after age ten began during the years in and around Peking, China. She thrived on challenges, surmounting them with a warm smile, inspiring words, and beauty. Like her sister Eirian, she is a teacher in the school and a tutor. Her list of talents include needlework and playing piano, as well as the impressive Orient skills of Speaking and Reading Manchu and Chinese, playing the erhu and flute, calligraphy, watercolor painting(all of the Chinese style of course) and playing Go. To the Western end of things, she also thrives in several languages and shares her Uncle Gwyilliam's love for mathematics.

At the age of 20, she wed a young Chinese convert in what would prove to be two permissible marriages of this sort with her sister taking the second. Tragically, injury and infection would pull her husband from this world in under a year's time, with no children left of the match. While in Paris in her adult years, she served as a governess to a family found by a man who claimed to be a "Friend" but was left nearly beaten with her virtue stolen. While the events of Paris have stayed with her? India heals as she throws herself head long in to learning local languages and history with her family, teaching, or chasing after her capricious niece.

Gwyilliam Obray, age 44, Dylan McDermott(Suggested) Brother, Uncle, Great Uncle, Secular Priest, Mathematician, Scientist IC Connections: Leveque Family, L'école Leveque Dame School, St. Christopher’s By the Sea(parish), Main Plot Feature in “Burning Day”

Gwyilliam had never wanted to be anything more than a priest, and happened to stumble in to his scholarly pursuits along the way. He had served in the Orient for many years by the time the suppression of the Jesuits came to pass. It was a sad thing to him, for they represented a way of teaching God and seeing the world that did not remove a person's host culture. By the time it all came to pass, he had returned to what was now a combined home with his fellow brother in spirit, and now by law, Jacq! God works in mysterious ways does he not? Just as he joined to be friends with the man in the Orient, it would be that their sister and brother, Ebrain and Barthelemy, wed in the West. Along with Father Louis de Poirot, they became a trio of Jesuits who remained in favor of the Emperor. Even if they were not, by holy law, Jesuits any longer? It was what they would always be called. Skilled in mathematics and science, he took to the history of the Church in the Orient with zeal. He read through the science of the country, finding things in the East the West had only began to touch on. A man of many opinions, it sees him author many books and being in the habit of teaching older male students the art of debate.

Returning to the West proved the hardest thing him and his family had ever done. The Catholic nation of France had then become secular, the Church dismantled, and priests had become servants of the state. Beliefs once held up saw him beaten. Schools he had gone to now closed. He tutored to help the family survive, and though sworn to serve the state of France? In secret, he continued to teach catechism to those who would ask. England proved a little better, but he was glad to return to the far side of the world. He is now a priest with no real order, having taken no new vows, and is happy in secular service. Like his fellow brother-in-law, he assists the family by balancing books, teaching, and tutoring. It is not uncommon to hear him clapping his hands or going "No that is not it!" in his debates, or being toppled down by his great niece.

Jacq Gabriel Leveque, age 50, Russell Crowe(Suggested) Brother, Uncle, Great Uncle, Secular Priest, Historian IC Connections: Leveque Family, L'école Leveque Dame School, St. Christopher’s By the Sea(parish)

Jacq was the brother far more strong, steadfast, and stable on his feet. So that he became a priest was something of a surprise to everyone, even given the birth order. However, his love of learning was surpassed only for his love to the Lord Almighty. Missionary work became a passion of his, not only because it took God to foreign lands? But it taught people like him that the world was wide, different, and broad in scope than some in Europe would have him believe. Even for his place in the Church, he had to work as hard as his brother did to become a Professor. When one is poor? One learns the value of hard work, patience, and gratitude. He is full of all three of these.

He never agreed with the suppression of the Jesuits, which he may call one of his greater faults given to not agree with such suppression would be to disagree with Holy Mother Church. However, it was men who complained long before His Holiness had, and men who saw fault where God might not have. Like his brother-in-law, he is very opinionated. He is apt to share them with those who will listen with an open mind, albeit with more care since his time in Revolutionary France. He agreed with the reason for the revolution, but was vocal against how it was being carried out after seeing whom it was harming. For this, he was beaten and imprisoned on more than one occasion. Now, he is less of a rabble rouser for public justice, but will help those in need regardless of their ethnic origin. Like his niece Eirian, while he respects the culture surrounding them, he finds the treatment of the Untouchables on par with the hardships faced by biblical Untouchables of the Old Covenant, and finds it sad and wrong. On a happier note, he much enjoys his loud debates with his brothers in law and nephew in law, walks with his nieces, and chasing after his great niece much to everyone's chagrin around the entire house.

Other Teachers, Servants, & Students

A maid-of-all-work or two for the household, meaning they help with everything from people dressing to cooking, cleaning, organizing, gardening, and errands. people to serve as assistant to the adults of the house, perhaps studying for things such as clerk positions or teaching positions. For the school, since it is growing, additional teachers welcome, especially fellow Catholics or those who followed other Catholics on mission-minded purposes! Someone to assist the family with the scheduling and book-keeping of the school and multiple clients for tutelage highly sought after. Also needed are those with ties to St. Christopher’s By The Sea.

If interested in these wanteds, the Dame school, or the parish please post in THIS thread.

#Wanted #Historical RP #Jcink Premium #18th Century #18+ Historical RP

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