#so the work is not particularly motivating

[thevalleyisjolly]

I think the Ghorman Front rebels are a tragic and brutally important exploration of individualism in resistance movements. The thing is, multiple characters from Cassian to Vel and Cinta warn them and us about the Front's approach to rebellion, about their lack of broader thinking and their unwillingness to follow orders. They're caught up in the righteousness of their cause and the terrible wrongs done to them by the Empire, they yearn to be saviours against injustice and specifically the injustice that the Empire has inflicted on them...and they can't see beyond that, beyond their own individual experiences of pain and their own individual desire to resist.

It's important to say here that the pain and injustice which fascism inflicts upon people is real, that in the story the characters' experiences with the cruelty and brutality of the Empire are legitimate and immediate for them. But particularly when it comes to the struggle for liberation (and that's not even getting into collective liberation), I think the Ghorman Front rebels are a painful example of what happens when personal experience becomes your entire movement.

It's true, outsiders may not know what exactly what the people of Ghorman have been through. The horrors of the Tarkin massacre, the individual paths and motivations that led each of them to the struggle. But the issue is that that's where the Ghorman rebels have stopped. They can't connect their very real suffering and concerns to the broader suffering and the broader struggle across the galaxy. Their focus is only ever on their own immediate experience- and so they're disappointed, even offended when people like Cassian and Vel and Cinta warn them that their plan is flawed or that they need to follow orders from people who better understand how the enemy works. It doesn't fit into their idea of rebellion - something out of a heroic story, maybe, where a daring group of local guerillas take on a much larger foe through their commitment to a righteous and personal cause. It hasn't crossed their minds that the Empire has put down many rebellions across the galaxy before, that they themselves are not particularly special or unique in cause or tactics or even suffering.

Or maybe it has crossed their minds, and they think they will be the exception. Isn't that how homegrown rebellions win? They know their home in a way that outsiders never will and they have the support of many of their fellow Ghormans and a strong belief in their cause, aren't those the qualities that make or break a successful revolution?

Season 2 so far has explored what it takes and what it costs to resist fascism. Arc 1 showed us one way resistance movements stumble and dissolve through infighting. In Arc 2, we meet characters who are (mostly) united in cause and leadership - the Ghorman Front, the Partisans, Luthen's network. And within this unity is the immense personal pain experienced by every single person as a result of their involvement in the fight. Characters attempt to cope with this cost in different ways, from substance use to reckless behaviour to lashing out.

Without condemnation (because trauma affects people in many ways), what I think we see with the Ghorman Front rebels is that they've retreated in on themselves. Perhaps once, they were a more collective movement - the hotel bellboy tells Cassian that many people showed up to the protest prior to the Tarkin massacre believing in the power and safety of so many people united together. But now, it's centred on the individual. They are going to show the rest of Ghorman that the Empire is lying. They mean to fight an armed struggle because they aren't spineless. Why should they follow orders, especially those of outsiders who don't know what they've been through, what they live with? It's a struggle entirely focused on the self, on their own feelings perhaps of conviction and guilt and powerlessness.

So they ignore advice that their course of action raises many questions. So they ignore orders to leave their weapons and stay in their assigned positions. So the wheel of tragedy turns and they accomplish their goal of stealing the weapons but at a terrible cost. One that will go with them for the rest of their lives and they will never be able to make up.

[popatochisssp]

Since, in The Hamper, Mal explains that Monsters can't handle "Red Magic" (which I assume meant Determination since the book showed a picture of a droopy Monster, which we know is what DT does to Monster bodies), and you also explained at some point that the color of a Skeleton's eyelights directly correlates to the color of magic they use, then what color of magic do the Underfell brothers use??? As far as I know, your versions of them exhibit signs of Red magic or red-ish, is that Determination or is that something else? If it is DT, then how are they not going all droopy and drippy like other Monsters that come in contact with DT?

It's red magic that the Underfell brothers use, yeah! And red magic is an infinitely less concentrated version of humans' Determination.

To pull Mal's quote directly out of The Hamper...

"MONSTER BODIES DON’T ALWAYS REACT TO IT WELL IN HIGH QUANTITIES. A FEW STUDIES HAVE BEEN DONE BUT NOTHING PARTICULARLY CONCLUSIVE WAS FOUND. …EXCEPT FOR A CORRELATION OF STABILITY WITH REPORTED LEVELS OF ANGER OR PASSION, AND A FEW OUTLIERS WITH TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES, ESPECIALLY IN THE FORMATIVE YEARS."

Jasper (Underfell Sans) and Pyre (Underfell Papyrus) fall right into those categories--anger? Absolutely yes. Passion? Definitely! Traumatic experiences in the formative years? Their formative years were traumatic experiences, it was almost nothing but!

It takes a very fiery personality to handle red magic well in high amounts, the passion to find it and tap into it, but also the focus and strength (Determination) to keep from being overwhelmed by it.

For monsters, using red magic is like playing with fire. It's powerful, but it can and will fuck you up if you're not in control of it.

Jasper picked it up when he was a reckless kid who didn't really care whether he lived or died--"dad" said he was weak and needed to get stronger, so fine, he'll do it this way, and if it kills him... Well, that'd throw a wrench in that shit old man's plans, fuck up his day and waste his 'research,' sounds like a win-win.

Obviously, he didn't kick any buckets. Turns out an abused, enslaved teenager full of hate for the prick who made him as nothing more than a science experiment actually had it in him to hold the reins on a fickle thing like red magic... Who knew?

Pyre's motivation to learn to harness red magic was...a lot more innocent.

He only wanted to know it because his big brother did, and he wanted to be just like him.

It's something Jasper regrets risking to this day, actually teaching him and getting him started with that shit. It was one thing to risk his own stupid life, but he never should've let Pyre even think about it, let alone hand him the russian-roulette-pistol himself...

But even back then, Pyre was a persistent little brat, and Jasper never had the stamina for a long fight.

It worked out fine, of course, and Pyre--brimming with passion and righteous fury at the many, many injustices in the world--probably has an even better handle on red magic than Jasper nowadays.

Jasper can concentrate a staggering amount of destructive power in one kill-shot attack, but Pyre can pace himself impressively well, less power per-hit but steadily maintained throughout a fight.

They're a formidable pair when they fight together, but even separately, they can hold their own against just about anything.

Yes, though, they might run into some problems if they ever lost their will to live, their joie de vivre, so to speak. If the Determination in their physical bodies outweighed the determination in their heart, there could definitely be some melting...but as long as they are who they are and can maintain that balance, they'll be just fine.

[utilitycaster]

Thought i was over it but i saw a post today that reminded me of how awful the villians of c3 were for whatever Matt tried to do. Anyway what are your thoughts on Ludinus staying a m9 problem and c3 should have had a villian from the continent?

Hi anon,

I think that it's fine that Ludinus was the Big Bad for Campaign 3, and I think the issues with the campaign being set on Marquet are not with him being the villain (honestly, Ludinus using his position of power in the Dwendalian Empire to seize control of an archaeological site in Marquet could have been an interesting avenue of exploration). Again, this was always intended to be a campaign of all parties coming together and setup from previous campaigns culminating.

Perhaps the larger issue is that the villain who was deeply of Marquet and heavily influenced by recent wars on the continent, Otohan, had about as much personality as hot dog water. This oversight was only made worse by the party and narrative doing absolutely nothing to explore the Apex War that shaped her (and presumably would have given her some motivations other than "Stabbity Stab; Ruidusborn").

Ultimately, though, the flaws of Campaign 3 are not any specific story element. They are the following two things and two things alone, both of which feed off each other in a vicious cycle.

Bells Hells did not know much about anything and did not particularly work to remedy this fact, and when faced with a plot for which the players were grossly unprepared, endlessly spun their wheels in pointless debates rather than making decisions or taking action.

Matt had a very specific plot in mind with very specific beats to hit and when the characters consistently failed to hit them, sort of didn't do anything to properly course correct and give the party clear guidance.

As a result we ended up with indecisive and incurious characters begging the world to give them any sort of answer instead of making any sort of interesting choices or bold move because they were so terrified to be wrong or bad that they ended up being something worse for fictional characters: dull and annoying; and a DM who either didn't see their listless flailing and throw them a rope, or who threw them multiple ropes with no guidance leading to a Buridan's Ass situation. Analysis paralysis in individual D&D characters can be interesting (Keyleth) but unexamined analysis paralysis in an entire party is a worse trait than being murderhobos, who might at least be fun to watch, and so, there we are.

Anyone blaming specific plot elements and not "the party was a bunch of people who didn't know shit about dick and no one was willing to seize the reins and say We're Going Here, and Matt didn't intervene" has a weird axe to grind. It's characters poorly suited for the story and DMing that didn't help shape them into something better suited. That's it. The Mighty Nein would have been a better party for this plot (assuming a similar first 10-20 episodes as C2 had, anyway) in that they were motivated people who made their own choices, but Vox Machina, with no ties to Ludinus whatsoever, would also have been better for the same reason. The Bad Kids from Fantasy High would have been better. Your average suburban book club who has one member who is really on top of picking books and emailing people would have been better. It's not that Ludinus was the wrong villain; it's that Bells Hells was an exceptionally and uniquely bad party for this story.

(I do think Ludinus's ending is dumb, but most of the flaws he had during the campaign can be chalked up to "a better party wouldn't have let him talk so much and he wouldn't have worn out his welcome so hard.")

[shinkai46]

On Naming (TCO/TDL/Victim)

The Chosen One

・Paradoxically, the reason TCO can wield all kinds of powers—fire, ice, lightning, laser beams, and so on—and is portrayed as a special stick figure in the series is probably because he was named "The Chosen One." Even though his appearance is almost identical to Victim’s, he possesses special abilities from the moment he’s named.

・TCO doesn’t want to be just another stick figure used by the Creator. That’s why, in AvA #2, he escapes from the drawing software. But in the end, Alan puts a chain on him and uses him as a tool.

・What TCO truly desires is freedom. He likely holds resentment toward Alan, who took that freedom from him, and perhaps toward humans in general.

The Dark Lord

・Victim, TCO, and TSC (regardless of what Alan actually did to them) were at least characters created for Alan’s animations. But TDL was created specifically to destroy TCO.

・After escaping Alan’s computer, TCO and TDL wreak havoc together across various online platforms. But I think their motives for destruction were different from the very beginning.

・TCO, having been enslaved by Alan, resents humans. By destroying platforms created by humans, he declares that he will no longer be subjugated by them.

・On the other hand, TDL was never enslaved by Alan. At the very least, he wasn’t chained and forced to work as ad-blocking software. And yet, he was even more enthusiastic about destruction than TCO.

・TDL isn't driven by resentment or hatred. He isn’t seeking anything beyond destruction. He destroys for the sake of destruction itself. That’s why TDL raises his hand not only against platforms made by humans, but also against fellow characters who are in the same position as he is. Destruction is his purpose as a character.

Side note ①: I wrote another post comparing TDL’s destructive impulses to TSC’s creativity. If you're interested, I hope you'll read that too. (TSC and Antagonists)

Side note ②: TDL was originally going to be named "The Chosen One's enemy," but Alan, seeking greater power, renamed him "The Dark Lord." If he had been given the name "The Chosen One's enemy," maybe he and TCO would never have joined forces to destroy Alan’s computer. What do you think?

Victim

・Victim is a victim of abuse by Alan, and later a victim of the chaos caused by TCO and TDL online.

・Given the name "Victim," I assume Alan had intended from the start to create an animation where the stick figure would be put in unjust circumstances. What surprised Alan was probably just the fact that Victim began acting on his own.

・From the moment he was named, it was decided that he would be a victim. Victim was never blessed by his creator.

・Maybe that’s why, despite the fact that the Gang and TCO clearly recognize Alan’s face, Victim sees him only as a cursor. I find that strange. Why is that?

・Through depictions of the abuse Victim suffered and the PTSD he developed, we viewers are shown just how cruel Alan’s actions were. However, I don’t think Alan is particularly evil. We often disregard the rights of fictional characters, placing them in unreasonable situations. Most fictional characters don’t have the means to resist.

・In AvA #11, Victim’s backstory is revealed. There were indeed moments in his life when he felt happiness. But that happiness never came from anything Alan gave him. It was always something he discovered for himself, someone he met on his own, something he obtained with his own power.

(・I myself was raised by an abusive parent, but I can still find happiness in life. That happiness doesn’t come from the negative legacy they left me, but from things I’ve found and made mine on my own.)

・Though he once found happiness, Victim becomes a “victim” again due to TCO and TDL’s rampage on the internet. He remains cursed by the name Alan gave him and cannot escape that legacy.

・What I wish for in AvA’s future… I'm not sure if it's possible, but I think Victim should be renamed. Not with the name “Victim,” which was never meant to bless him, but with a name that allows him to be himself. And I believe the one who should rename him—the one who should most bless his existence—is Alan. Do you think that moment will ever come? I don’t know, but I hope it does.

・I’m not sure if this is related to the power of names I’ve discussed here, but according to the Q&A LIVE stream, Mitsi was named by spelling “Victim” backward.

・Characters shouldn’t exist solely to be used by creators. Ideally, creators should help characters become who they truly are.

[dock57]

What are your favorite songs from the Monkey Wrench ost?

[Man that's a hard one! Its been awhile since I last listened to the Monkey Wrench OST as a whole. So I had to sit down and listen to it again to find my favorites (and least as well). First off, I got to say but Ockeroid made an AWESOME OST for Money Wrench, absolutely adore the work! Its been so long since I heard a soundtrack that is so focused on using clear sounding instruments, particularly the guitar in the MW OST! To be frank, the use of the guitar and majority of the OST having a rock vibe to it all is something I have not seen in awhile in a OST, so its a bit of a refresher. It reminds me a bit of No Straight Roads, a video game that I adore, that had a really sick rock 'n' roll OST as well. The score itself... it does such an amazing job at capturing the overall mood and feeling to the series. I can listen to each track and visualize the part where it takes. As for some favorites, I know the first one I have to mention is well, the overall "Monkey Wrench theme" (Tools in Space) and along with the "Monkey Pit." I mean the theme itself pulled me in for the show, that build up intro and the sick guitar solo that is blasting in my ear- I love the mood it set already, it was already telling me that Monkey Wrench is going to be an adventure based show with a cool story to go along.

I also love "Scrambled Bird" from episode 1, Ghost Egg, which played during the whole scene where Shrike, Beebs, Tyneen and Scratch basically was fighting over for Norbert at the port. I just love the overall beat to this one. Its funky, funny and motivating!

I will be honest with you guys, but episode 2, Lythops Liberation has some of my least favorite tracks- mainly "Lil Guys (Wah Wah!)" and "Lil Campfire Song." These tracks in the actual show, not bad! But alone they are- a bit to suffer through... that "wah wah wah" chorus might drive me a bit nuts after awhile...

As for a favorite from this episode, it would be "Granny 2.0." Just another track with an awesome beat to it. I love the attempt at insisting fear with it, as during the episode, Granny was posing to be quite a damn threat- should have watched more cartoons back in her days though.

Episode 3 OST is just *Chef's Kiss* such a good soundtrack. I am just a sucker for that acoustic guitar and of course every time I hear it, it makes me think of Beebs. Because of that, I got to say that "Hello Stranger" is one of my favorites. I love the overall feeling it gives off, mysterious but, comforting. Damn I just want to listen that guitar being played all day...

I also love "Tales of the Cataclysm." When alone, its such a beautiful track. The piano, the mysterious yet curious feeling it creates, it makes me want to flow down a river of endless space and cosmos. Its such a relaxing track for something that's suppose to appear sinister.

As for Episode 4, Plague Walkers, it also has a soundtrack that I just go 👌Like Perfection~ As for my favorites, I would place "I was Trying to Help" and "Alien Strip Club" next to each other for my favorites for their overall beat. Alien Stripe Club just has a really sick beat to it, that well, could be perfect to get down to. While Trying to Help, I guess it reminds me my favorite scenes in this episode, the moments that felt so well taken care of, which is when Shrike is self-deprecating and when Beebs and Shrike confront each other after being chased by Ajax and Kara. Those interactions are so well done, they hit me, as well as the soundtrack that goes along with them.

My last favorite is "Kin vs. Kin." Its the first episode where we are finally getting some specs to Beebs' lore and this track, I love the combination of the two different personalities mashing together. You have Beebs, the rock, and Ajax, represent by the classical sound of instruments. I especially LOVE that towards the end, around 1:51, you can heard this faint "heart beat" in the distance. Its a beat alone, but I love the feeling it gives- anxiety, stress, the overall feeling of being pressured. Listening to it tells me so much about Beebs, a man with a troubled past, trying to run away from the stress of it, while the past is trying to claw it way back into Beebs' life. It feels like a "time bomb" for him, waiting any minute to go off.

That's it for this ask! If you haven't already, please check out the full OST and give it a listen! Just like the show, the OST is a work of art. A soundtrack really helps make a show memorable, and I wound say that this one does it job's really well!]

[barneswilsonrogers]

justice for bucky too

Thunderbolts is literally a Yelena movie. Which is okay—yeah, Florence is a talented actress and she's the new Natasha, so I guess it makes sense to make her the center of the movie, BUT by doing so they completely dismissed the others. Particularly BUCKY.

I am upset with what this movie did to Sam, but Bucky has also been done dirty. This is the most OOC Bucky has ever been. He didn't smile, he has no motivations. He's only yapping about stopping Val and joking and bantering with Walker, but other than that... nothing. The congressman thing means nothing and goes nowhere.

Like hello?? One of the most emotionally complex characters in the MCU and you give him NOTHING? Not even a moment of introspection? A scrap of character development? A crumb?? I’m sick.

Every single member gets their Big Angsty Monologue™ moment—even Walker—but Bucky? He cracks a joke about his trauma and moves on. Yelena and Bucky have been through eerily similar hell, but only she is allowed to express it?? He doesn't get a breakdown, a confrontation, not even a bitter one-liner that hits too close to home?? His whole life has been a mess of pain and manipulation, but yeah, sure, let’s give Walker more screentime. Absolutely unhinged of them.

Bucky has been with us since phase one, mind you. He deserves his own movie too. He's the fucking Winter Soldier, goddammit.

That fuck-ass post-credit scene is even more insane. Fourteen months of him and Sam working with separate teams. They probably didn’t see each other for 14 months, and next, they’re gonna be in Doomsday. If they wanted to create drama for the sake of the plot—well, they did it. But when has Marvel ever made a satisfying payoff? They always half-ass everything. So now SamBucky could be ruined forever. Urgh.

[iamshyasfuck]

I feel like I've been fed exactly what I was wanting,, THIS ISNT CHRISTMAS AND I GOT A FEAST!!!!DR WHITE ANALYSIS LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

and also like one that is very similar from my depiction of Dr white as a character and that'd mean that I actually did him justice from whatever scraps I had to work with?? YUMMY, anyways I'll be going over the points you made that I particularly found very interesting and also TYSM for replying!! :)

Dr White's personality and motivation.

I particularly LOVE the way u described Harley's vision of White as a character, Harley thinks of White as nothing more than a bitter joke, prolly just ordering him around so he wouldn't have to deal with him, actually he would prolly do that with everyone else seeing as he does not share any interest in his coworkers, so jokes in the workplace to "lighten up the mood" or something go very unappreciated by Harley's behalf, especially IF Harley sees White's objective as selfish or self driven.

I do have my own fair share of shame on trying to impress others so I think it's also very interesting to see Dr white actually doing that, albeit selfish, Harley is not very different from him as far as I see it(since he was thrown off by Elliot from the YGP, I can see a similarity of maybe Harley doing everything he could to show Elliot what he was really worth it since he could not understand Elliot alr saw potential in him, just not was ready for it.)

Dr White's and Harley's relationship

I already talked to my friends about this I think a billion times but I can't help but find it so INTERESTING to analyze, as well as my analysis go unfortunately(I am not very good at em).

From my perspective, as I explained it before, Sawyer sees nothing much of Dr white except from all the things he can't forget from when he was turned into 1354, 'eyes peering from behind the glass', many bad memories about him were formed after the experiment, likely just people treating him as a tool rather than what Harley wanted to be recognized as.

Kinda makes you wonder if those bad memories were overwritten over past ones, not that I think they had a good relationship of any kind seeing from his loser personality, but it is amusing to think about.

Dr white on the other hand, seems to be very balanced unlike Sawyer, managing to keep workplace business steady, while also attempting to make it fun for himself, lightning up the mood with silly jokes as to not get on anyone's bad side, though that only made Sawyer dislike him even more, thinking of his jokes as nothing more than a mockery of some kind, but ngl i would too if i met Sawyer- getting to the point, you can see it in the notes that White recognizes Harley as a person to avoid "if you still want to keep your head", someone that takes jokes very seriously, but will casually just joke about what he says behind his back once he left the room. and also it really makes me want to just draw Dr white whispering to another scientist "one pickle away" whenever Harley is being his usual self and having to hold their giggles, ah the joys of art💞💞

Anyways I would love to see more of their interactions to get a clear look at it(or just more about dr white in general), since my lenses are very dirty for this type of magnifying glass analysis, also so sorry if I accidentally hammered down the same subject, I am very bad like I said at explaining myself.

Also a little side note I'm really interested in whatever is the foreman of the misfit pit and why White is even trying to do whatever he is doing, "however perverse it may be".

anyways have Sawyer playing banjo in dead rails

Dr Bruno White & Experiment 1354 [Theory]

I was writing a completely different theory in relations to MOB's latest trailer, when this realisation hit me like that hardest ton of brick ever.

You guys know, recently I studied the Ch.4 ARG for my story writing. I wanted to know more about Dr. White for writing his character, and in one of the emails from Harley he says: '[A bad memory]' and I interpreted it as Harley saying White has a bad memory. I think it's actually Harley having bad memories of White, and what he did to him after he became 1354.

Eg. The full email the above reads:

(The emailer asked)

Dr White?

(Harley replies)

'[Eyes peering from behind a pane of glass] He always did have a certain drive, didn't he? [A bad memory] But what good did it do him? None. He's dead.'

I initially thought the in brackets stuff was Harley, but it's EYES. Two eyes. He only has one as, 1354. But eyes peering from being a glass pane would refer to how he was being watched in an observation room, like the other experiments.

This robot-man has trauma. Trauma from Dr White.

When asked by another emailer what he remembers, all he says is:

Bruno

Another good example, an emailer asks:

What did he do to you?

(Harley replies)

The footage is archived (more bad memories) I won't dwell on it.

We also know throughout the email, Harley speaks negatively about White, implying he doesn't like him. (I think I mentioned somewhere,) my theory that they had a less negative relationship pre-1354, and I'm still inclined to believe that based on his whole:

White?! White is that you?!

He sounds hurt, and him complimenting White's drive could show one of his few lingering positive memories of White. Cause, like, take it from me, as someone with trauma relating to a person I had a good relationship with once in the past, when I think of said person, none of those positive memories come to the surface. Only the traumatic ones. (I'm fine folks. This was years ago, I'm healed & good now. This was just a great example of the feelings Post-1354 would have towards... the abuser?).

We also know the admin account & password belonged to Dr. White (, with the password being a mocking jab at something Harley use to say all the time). So White was fully in control over Harley. Sure. That's one reason to have some trauma, but...

I also was looking at the red text again, with this new point of view about Harley & White in mind. I think the red text is 1354's thoughts being displayed on a screen.

Leith says in the 1354 tape:

You'll be like an open book to us whenever we want.

I think he meant this quite literally. That's why he tells Harley he can fight or give in. It doesn't matter because they can read his every thought regardless.

More evidence to back this up, with the red text being Harley's thoughts:

I can see you. You aren't welcome here.

And

They can see. away. Don't think it. Hide it from yourself. rwk

(idk what 'rwk' stands for. I couldn't really find anything solid).

I'm about out of steam with this lol. Just thought it was intresting to throw out there into the void :P

Also, really interesting that one of the things he says replies is:

I know my name.

Annoyingly, I can't find the email this came from, to give it context. Interesting regardless. To forget one's own name would almost suggest a level of brainwashing, maybe? IDK.

Not sure on the whole brainwashing thing, but it's a fun idea.

If we assume the first red text we start with is the last time anyone accessed Harley's thoughts (that being White), then their final conversation is intreaging, because it would suggest Harley was more bitter than White (I mean... hard to be bitter when you weren't the one turned into a brain in a jar, lol):

He asks if I still dream? Why? This changes nothing. A broken leash. Casket. I do. What became of her? Theater incident still strange, the things that linger.

[longroadstonowhere]

trying so hard to just actually finish this assignment instead of watching youtube for an hour

[tunapesto]

let's fall down together

[mercymaker]

bruv comparison is truly the mind killer like damn...

[leah2eroes]

i have a problem. i really enjoy playing grind-y, heavily gated progression based tech modpacks in minecraft. until i dont anymore. i will just suddenly lose all interest in progressing despite how much i do genuinely enjoy the gameplay loop (which tbqh is gratifying in a very specific way and somehow works for me). i can and will sink dozens of hours into gaining more and more progress with the only real goal being "make more progress", and it works for me until inexplicably i dont want to boot up the game again. stupid brain

[topnotchquark]

In the spirit of this quaint men-on-motorcycles-enthusiast blog I went to watch The Bikeriders and had my heart quietly broken by a slow but softly luminous movie. Something about men's expansive lives and how movement is ultimately the seed from which all freedom grows. When you see Tom Hardy's Johnny slowly strain and crack under the realization that something he created out of simpler desires is now turning into a hydra headed problem he can't seem to solve, you understand something about existing in a world where your need for belonging is a vulnerability that eventually gets you.

When he asks Austin Butler's Benny about taking over the gang from him he's submitting himself to someone he trusts. Their faces slowly coming together, closer and closer, in the dark with just the incandescent glow of the streetlamps on the edge of their faces, like burning paper. How Benny is too stubborn to understand that its not a favor being asked of him, but a declaration of something deeper from Johnny. What a beautiful narrative choice it was to have a woman recollect this entire story of this rag-tag group of men, who herself was affected by the atmosphere she found herself unable to get out of. I love that it works like a non-judgemental narration of how quickly boyhood bluster breaks down when real life circumstances get rough. How difficult it was for Johnny to keep the community together because he didn't expect it to be anything more than a quaint cosplay when he started it to escape boredom. At the end where Benny finally gets the news of Johnny's murder, something done to usurp his frayed authority, and he returns to Chicago and breaks down on Kathy's stoop, I found myself crying alongside him.

The movie was clearly a labour of love from someone who had deep fascination with the lives of these men and with motorcycles. Wild that a two wheeled liquid fuel powered machine has been the site of so many meditations on masculinity and rebellion and anger and power and authority. I don't know if I want to revisit it but I am glad I got to watch it in the time period of my life that my deep fascination with bikes and men's lives makes it so much more valuable to me.

[wonder-worker]

"[Elizabeth Woodville's] piety as queen seems to have been broadly conventional for a fifteenth-century royal, encompassing pilgrimages, membership of various fraternities, a particular devotion to her name saint, notable generosity to the Carthusians, and the foundation of a chantry at Westminster after her son was born there. ['On other occasions she supported planned religious foundations in London, […] made generous gifts to Eton College, and petitioned the pope to extend the circumstances in which indulgences could be acquired by observing the feast of the Visitation']. One possible indicator of a more personal, and more sophisticated, thread in her piety is a book of Hours of the Guardian Angel which Sutton and Visser-Fuchs have argued was commissioned for her, very possibly at her request."

— J.L. Laynesmith, "Elizabeth Woodville: The Knight's Widow", Later Plantagenet and Wars of the Roses Consorts: Power, Influence, Dynasty

[practically-an-x-man]

ughhh they have me scheduled to close next weekend and the weekend after that and I just. don't want to.

[lieutenantselnia]

Yesterday I've been doing some proper physical exercise for the first time since last year and I'm just imagining how proud my f/os would be of me🥹

[dracimexidae]

What better workout for my arms than working this beast of a thread right here 🥵