#so pre-me1 canon

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

RATING: Explicit (Mentions of Graphic Violence, Brief Mentions of Smut) Word Count/Chapters: 52k, 5 Chapters Pairing: None Characters: Female Shepard, Zaeed Massani

“You’d get us involved with the goddamn fucking Marauders? You know exactly what they’re doing out on the edge of the Traverse. Trying to push into the Hades Nexus. Capture more fucking humans for slave trading. They’re burning down fucking colonies, Santiago. Slaughtering families like it’s goddamn nothing at all. You want the Suns involved with that kind of shit? We’re not about that. We’ve never been about that.” A shake of his head. A huff of Vido’s own breath as his snapped back around to face him. A new fire in his eyes. Fury, scorn… maybe something he’d never even seen before. But he was so goddamn far past gone, he should have realized it sooner. "It ain’t about that, Massani. Dezda’s Marauders are the smart fuckin’ option now. Cheaper labor. They know their shit. Know how to transport. Can handle smuggling for us… zero fuckin’ issues. You think that kinda shit was easy to find out here? You know how many creds we can save gettin’ involved with them instead of the fuckers on station? Who gives a shit if some little piss-fuckin’ colonists end up gettin’ worked to the bone out past the inner relays? Not the Council. Why the fuck should we?” A scoff from him this time. He couldn’t believe how quickly the man he’d once trusted with his life would sell his soul to the fucking devil. His partner. The only person he’d ever trusted. The mercenary outfit they’d built together, and he wanted to sell it out to fucking Batarian slavers. Like it was nothing more than a common fucking street gang. "So you’re gonna take every fucking thing we built? And sell it to those little fucking terrorists? And for what? A deal on cheaper goddamn labor? I always knew you were a bastard, Santiago. Never thought you’d lie down in bed with goddamn fucking terrorists. Never thought you were a coward.” A crowd had started gathering by that point. Other Suns members. People slightly down the totem pole. Their disagreement had drawn the attention of everyone else in the facility, but all he saw from Vido was a sharp little smirk tugging its’ way across the corners of his lips. And then a shrug. "I’ve never given two shits about your opinion of me, Massani. You were always some old bastard merc… too stuck in his ways. Too fuckin’ softhearted. Never had the guts to do the shit that mattered. Always content to pussy-out on anything that really counted. All you are is some old fuckin’ mutt, still leashed to the old rules. The old values. The old ways. The Suns? They never belonged to you. We took a vote. We already decided.” Another smirk and he just as quickly brandished the Karpov strapped to his hip. He hadn’t had enough time to react and grab his own. Why would he? He hadn’t expected Vido to pull a gun on him. They were partners. Someone he’d trusted with his life. They’d built the Suns together. “You’ve been overruled.”

[innepttia]

@spookyvalentine has FOUR sets of “50 questions about Shepard” list and this is the third!!

Maeve Shepard

First 50 Questions | Second 50 Questions

TW: mentions of alcohol abuse & canon typical death

(Art by tumblr: @/milton-chamberlain)

1. How often does Shepard use the omni-blade?

Omni-blade, not a lot but it’s her favorite weapon to use (ok I know this is contradictory but just go with me). Omni-tool – ALL THE TIME.

2. What does the Virmire Survivor think of Shepard?

Ashley! I think she wishes they were closer, because they really would get along if they both gave it a shot. If Shepard didn’t die, they’d probably have become besties at some point and perhaps Shepard could have still soothed over some of that xenophobic nature of Ashley’s.

3. Top three comfort movies:

Howl’s Moving Castle

Princess Bride

Shallow Grave

4. How many languages can they speak (without the translator)?

Oh, I love that Spooky has asked this in the Mass Effect discord we’re in because I already know the answer now!!

English, ASL (which doesn’t really count for translator-use), and – in my own HC – spacers have a language similar to The Expanse’s Belter Creole.

5. Does Shepard keep a log/journal?

No. Which is a boring answer, but no.

6. What kind of driver is Shepard?

I like to HC that she actually would rather have others drive so she can tinker with something. So, instead of driver, she’s a passenger princess.

7. Shepard witnesses a petty crime. What is their response?

She ignores it! Maeve really cultivates an air of: “If this doesn’t affect me, then I don’t care.”

8. Revenge, or the high road?

REVENGE, BABEEYYYYY – but only in her head because she’s a busy lady and doesn’t have time to really properly act out her revenge.

9. What will always distract them?

Thane, Thane, Thane, Thane, alcohol, Thane, Thane, Joker, Thane, Thane, Thane, etc.

10. Does Shepard ascribe to any sort of faith?

No, but she becomes interested in Thanes.

11. Fondest childhood memory?

By ME2, she isn’t sure her childhood memories are really hers, so she tries to forget them.

12. Most embarrassing adult memory?

In ME2, before Thane’s romance was locked in, she got so drunk one day and drunk-messaged Ashley trying to flirt with her. Then when that was completely rejected, she went straight to Zaeed to try and flirt with him, but she became so distracted in the garbage compactor that she missed her one chance with that old merc. Joker was 100% watching the vid feeds and EDI was monitoring her messages to Ashley.

13. What does Shepard choose to do about Gavin Archer?

THIS mothafuckin guy THIS GUY ohhhhh my god. I think canon choice was “your brother is going to Grissom Academy and you can fuck right off” but the unhinged, more correct choice is: iron pressed against his temple and ending it all then and there for Gavin.

14. Is Shepard the type to gossip?

If it’s gossip with Kasumi, yes, because Kasumi has the best tea and tells the best story. Anyone else, probably not.

15. How does Shepard react to Garrus’s Archangel reveal?

I’m just going to go with the canon-neutral reaction.

16. What was the N7 program like for Shepard?

This was when she was A Good Soldier and A Good Person (pre-ME1), so it went pretty well, all things considered. She was focused and driven and wanted to be the best she could be.

17. Go-to karaoke song?

ANOTHER ONE I CAN ANSWER BECAUSE OF DISCORD thank god. This song because it’s mostly shouting instead of singing:

Fire Woman – The Cult

18. What choice does Shepard make on Rannoch?

Okay so, this one might get me a lot of hate BUT I’ve always accidentally (I’m so serious about this) picked the option here Tali throws herself off the cliff. Like, I’m not joking. It doesn’t matter how many years are between play throughs, or if I’m like, OKAY THIS TIME…!!! I always manage to pick that option. In an AU, I’d really like for the Geth and the Quarians to make peace and build the planet together and I’m just inept at making Good Choices.

19. Which kind of reaper do they think is the ugliest?

That stupid Human-Reaper from ME2.

20. Can they dance?

She can sway to music really well.

21. What is Shepard’s relationship with Hackett?

Mostly annoyed at him. In her eyes, Hackett is up there with TIM.

22. What’s their alignment? Paragon, renegade, a mix…

Renegade all the way. Light up her face with scars.

23. Got any allergies? How bad?

No, because I honestly just won’t remember she has them.

24. When’s their birthday, and how old are they?

Canon birthday and canon age!

25. Trash talk or potty mouth

BOTH!

26. What’s their temper like?

Flares hot, but then it dies down pretty quickly because she’s either smothering it with alcohol or she’s already moved on to the next crisis.

27. What does Shepard think of Bakara?

EVEEEE and not my clone named Eve!!!!! She adores her and will do anything for her.

28. A reoccurring nightmare:

Indoctrination. She can’t shake the feeling that, even after everything, she’s indoctrinated.

And Moon’s Haunted fic.

29. Which news correspondent/journalist does Shepard bring on the Normandy? What’s their relationship like?

Diana Allers and it’s a relationship of: Maeve forgets she’s there until Diana reminds her.

30. Who’s got the biggest crush on Shepard?

Ummm ME!!! Hmm definitely Joker in all 3 games, Garrus in 1 and 2, (and finally a HC) the Geth (and OC) she messages all throughout ME3.

31. What kind of relationship do they have with Dr. Chakwas? Which doctor do they bring her on board for 3, and why?

Good! They’re drinking buddies, except Dr. Chakwas is obviously less unhinged about it.

32. Who has Shepard’s grudging respect?

Javik & Zaeed.

33. Reaction to the window over their sr-2 bed

Kill Bill sirens.

34. Does Shepard want children?

Not just no, but hell no.

35. What does Shepard consider their greatest mistake?

Joining the Alliance.

36. Did Shepard enjoy the heists with Kasumi?

Yes, this was her favorite mission. I think I mentioned this in one of the previous 50 questions, but she was excited for the heist. She was excited to dress up and to have even the slightest potential to not kill anyone.

37. Does Shepard ever play matchmaker?

Ngl, I like Liara and Javik together so I’d like to imagine she helped with that somehow.

38. A silly daydream:

While she was on house arrest after ME2 and before ME3, she daydreamed that Joker would come visit her and they’d rekindle whatever they had before.

Or, she’d imagine Thane would come rescue her like a damsel in distress.

(god these aren’t really “silly” are they?!)

39. What kind of media do they consume the most?

Tech news, but she’s pretty off mainstream media content. She prefers to spend time with her crew in person.

40. Favorite ice cream flavor

Cookies and cream.

41. If Shepard has a LI, what would they say are a couple of Shepard’s flaws? And strengths?

I think we all like to imagine our LI’s being over the moon about our Sheps, and my HCs are no different.

Thane sees her as the spitting image of one of his goddesses. She’s strong, relentless, ruthless, and determined, which are all qualities he admires. In private, she’s soft and a puddle of mush most of the time. I like to think he enjoys taking care of her (e.g. blanket over the shoulders, a good cuddle session, sharing food).

Her flaws come through pretty starkly in all these sets of 50 questions: she can make REALLY poor choices, she can get tunnel vision on certain missions, she can be too brash.

42. Are they quick to laugh, or slow to smile?

Okay, I’m probably going to be annoying with this but I’m going to say both to this one too (like the potty mouth or trash talking one). I think she’s quick to laugh, but it isn’t always genuine. She’ll laugh when she feels like there’s a social cue she needs to meet. She’s slow to smile because those would be her true, genuine feelings.

43. What does it take to earn Shepard’s trust?

Most people have her trust from the beginning. She doesn’t feel like she has time to be untrusting, so her initial trust is easy to get. As long as that isn’t broken, then all’s golden. If the initiate trust is broken then it’s near impossible to get it back.

44. Top three people Shepard thinks are hotties:

Samara

Nyreen

Zaeed

+Thane because he’s her Li so that’s a given

45. What’s the easiest way to gross them out?

Throw up. THAT’S ALL hahahaha but fr gross.

46. What are some of their favorite combo moves with team members out on the field?

Oooohh this is embarrassing for her and me. I always forget team members and Shepard can do combo moves together, so I never do it. So lets go with: she’s a lone wolf who likes to do her own tech combos herself.

47. Can they forgive easily, or are they the type to hold a grudge?

Neither! She’d rather just forget.

48. Does Shepard have a good sense of direction?

She relies solely on her HUD that she doesn’t know anymore!

49. Did they enjoy their party on the Citadel?

Yes, it was nice getting everyone together, but she really missed Thane.

50. What is Shepard’s ending?

Maeve, beloved, goes full destroy ending, which includes destroying herself. I’ve talked about this a lot in the server so I’m not going to get too much in the weeds but… she’s very content with this choice.

+1 …got any kinks?

*looks back at question 33* yes – a choking kink whoops

[clericofshadows]

Shepard aaaaaask!

3, 14, 21 (give me details! hehe), and 33 😉

thanks for the ask :D

fifty shepard questions

3. What’s their relationship with Anderson?

For Regis it's... not great. I've written some fic on it, but the TL;DR is that Hannah wanted Regis to have a good mentor, and he said fuck that to any sort of meddling and mostly just respects the man for his skills alone and keeps him at a far distance. He doesn't quite like that he was blindsided about being evalutated for Spectre status nor does he appreciate his visions being brought up in front of the Council.

He does nominate him for Council since he doesn't really trust Udina either, and in his mind it's a lesser of two evils. Their relationship never really goes beyond, in Regis's mind, "coworkers I have to tolerate."

For Nyx, it's cordial. He doesn't have much of an opinion on Anderson and sees him as a decent ally to have. Nyx, however, nominates Udina as the Council rep since he doesn't like the idea of putting a military man on the seat despite being a First Contact War veteran. Or maybe because he's a FCW vet... :)

14. Any good at flirting?

Regis is pretty good at it and can even ramp up the charm as needed for missions. And he also managed to get Zaeed in his and Kaidan's bed while on Omega during vorcha mafia nonsense and a pissed off merc who's mad that his target was now focused on two alliance idiots...

Bonus gif from same gender romance mod's flirt option for Hock lmao

Nyx is extremely good at flirting and can charm the pants off of anyone (or rather any man). He's very confident and into himself, which can be pretty attractive. He's also quite observant and has a good feel for what a person might like. And he was able to get Kaidan in his bed pre-ME1 for a one night stand, and I typically headcanon Kaidan as not being into that sooooo yeah :)

21. Do you have any AUs for your shepard?

I have a few :)

Regis's canon is technically one big AU in the sense that I get rid of canon things I don't like (Liara as Shadowbroker, for one, Virmire being a no win scenario... etc), but in Nyx's canon, Regis is actually a doctor on Omega with his uncle, Vikram, and leads a bit of a merc life with Zaeed. On the other hand, Nyx in Regis's canon never rejoined the Alliance after an extended time after the FCW and stays as a civilian engineer, who also stays in his relationship with Hackett. In Nyx's canon, he breaks up with Hackett, later enters a relationship with Kaidan pre-ME1, and then later the three of them become a triad.

There's also the fact that Nyx's canon is a sort of No Reapers AU... in the sense that the Protheans failed to fully extinguish most Reapers and a few still remain, but not enough to be a galaxy ending one.

Regis as a doctor/merc also exists in a Kaidan/Hackett fic I've been slowly writing as well. But other than that, I don't really have any modern AUs or anything of the sort since I see my Shepards already existing as big ol' AUs.

33. What skills do they have that are a surprise to the people around them?

Regis is good with metalworking and making jewelry, and he is quite skilled with making custom weapon mods. Not as good as Zaeed, which he gloats about, but it's something he learned on the side. And despite his degree being public, it's always a shock that he knows his way around cybernetics and can talk real technical when it comes to biotic amps and VI and AI...

Plus he can make really good desserts.

Nyx moonlights as a hacker and is well known on many extranet forums as Phoenix, which should be obvious given his callsign in the war being Phoenix, but to the greater 'net it's a mystery. Like, yeah, he's an engineer who is good with tech and is good with cybersecurity, but a hacker who posts tricks and takes down shit in his free time? Not so obvious.

He's also really good with intricate braids and loves braiding his hair and beard and offering his skills to the other long-haired folks on the ship.

[otemporanerys]

Spectre Requisitions ‘23 - The Rec Post!!

It’s that time of year again! I took part in the Spectre Requisitions Rare Pair Exchange @spectre-requisitions-exchange (link to the collection here) and man. SO MUCH good shit.

I can’t reveal what I wrote (yet) but I have been reading through the collection and here’s a few incredible works that I really enjoyed! Remember to kudos and comment if you find anything you like 💖

(NB: I focused on fic, but honestly every bit of fanart I’ve seen for it is also incredible, please go check it out)

Gifts for Me

I was SO lucky this year - loyal friends will know that I’ve been suffering from a massive dose of Lawkarian brainrot, and I got not one, but TWO long-ass Garrus/Miranda fics!!!! honestly still can’t get over it, incredible

Between the Devil and the Deep, Garrus/Miranda, 20K, E

Set pre-ME2, Miranda recruits Archangel for a job, fucks him to keep him sweet.

This is just. Pure filth, and I love it. Aliases, power plays, both Garrus and Miranda being amoral little weirdos. What more can you ask for?

The Woman in White, Garrus/Miranda, 16.9K, E

Set pre-ME2, Miranda recruits Archangel for a job, doesn’t really do ANYTHING to keep him sweet (but they fuck anyway).

:chinhands: This is just. GORGEOUSLY written, and the begrudging way in which they start to like each other (but not too much) is incredible. Top-notch Garrus POV

Gen

loose ends, Maelon & Mordin, 9.9K, T

Set during and after ME3, canon-divergent AU. Maelon finds Mordin in the wreckage after Tuchanka and nurses him back to health.

I love their relationship in this - Mordin’s so aware of Maelon’s weaknesses (or what he perceives to be his weakness) but there’s still so much caring, despite the huge gulf between them. Also the easiest way to make me a teary mess is a Urdnot Mordin cameo 😭

The Stories We Tell, Joker & Tali, 3.1K, T

Set during ME1. Tali forces Joker to be her friend.

Really great dialogue for everyone - it’s very cute and fun until suddenly it’s not!!! which is rude!!! but still very good, A+++

Care and Maintenance, Kaidan & Tali, 2.2K, T

Set during ME1. Kaidan and Tali bond over dads, tech and Shepard’s reckless driving.

This one was just nice! And also who doesn’t love a bit of Shepard driving slander

F/F

swear, this one you’ll save, Nyreen/Solana, 1.5K, G

Pre-canon: five times Solana has a secret about Nyreen.

I’m only slightly obsessed with these two, and this fic was so perfect. Childhood friends to lovers is a god-tier trope, and it’s so deliciously bittersweet

Real, Beautiful, f!Shali, 0.7K, G

Post-ME3, A morning on Rannoch.

The post-war fluff we deserve, imo!

A Knife in Starlight, Morinth/f!Shepard, 1K, M

Set during ME2. Character study with a side of smut.

I think Morinth is incredibly interesting as a character, but the real standout of this fic is the Shepard - Ruthless, stone butch, wonderfully jagged.

M/M

Collide, m!Shakarian, 4.1K, M

Set during ME2. Friends-to-lovers and mutual pining.

I love m!Shakarian anyway, but mutual pining?? Sexually charged pining?? LOVE CONFESSIONS?? Good shit

M/F

Change of Command, Garrus/Miranda, 3.6K, M

Set during ME2. Epistolary fic, a series of comms transcripts between Garrus and Miranda.

Yes, someone else wanted Lawkarian!! The (verbal) sparring is so much fun, and the format is perfect.

Beauty Like a Raging Flame, f!Shaeed, 6.2K, E

Set during ME2. Shepard gets into a fight in Afterlife, and Zaeed has to go pick her up.

There’s a lot of Shaeed this year! But this one is my favourite. The Zaeed voice is great (appropriately crusty, not too soppy, just the way I like it) and it’s nice seeing him paired off with a Paragon Shep. Plus, Zaeed’s turned on by violence. Smutty perfection

only echoes in the melody now, Kasumi/Keiji’s Greybox, 3.4K, E

Post-ME3. Bittersweet porn with feelings.

God, this one really blew me away. The prose is incredible, and there’s so many little bits that really land how fucked up the greybox concept really is. The ending is great, too. Can’t recommend this enough.

Longing Makes a Thief, Kasumi/Rolan Quarn, 17.7K, E

Kasumi and Rolan run into each other during a job, and realise they’ve met before - sort of.

This was so much fun - bubbly like a glass of champagne. The banter’s great, the smut is great, it’s all so good. Run, don’t walk!

Poly

An Unfortunately Sexy Man, Addison/Kandros/Kesh/Tann, 6.6K, M

MEA. Addison, Kandros and Kesh all have one thing in common: a devastating, inexplicable crush on Director Tann.

I’m not really one for crack, but this is definitely an exception. Genuinely funny, and the Tann voice in particular is incredibly on-point.

[monowires]

info dump about ‘my’ shepard because i’m Autistic™️

DEFAULT/CANON MALE SHEPARD / sheploo (calling him this is so funny)

name: commander john shepard

birthday: april 11, 2154

class: adept (L3 pre-me2, L5x post-me2 prologue)

background: earthborn, sole survivor

morality: paragon (me1), paragade (me2), renegon (me3)

skill set (italicized = most used)

combat style: medium-range offensive

weapons: sniper rifles & pistols

powers: barrier, pull, reave, singularity, shockwave, slam, throw, warp

friendships/relationships

sexuality: gay

canon/primary romantic partner: kaidan alenko

headcanon/alternate romantic partners: garrus vakarian & jeff moreau

queerplatonic partner(s): tali’zorah vas normandy, liara t’soni

best friends: wrex, EDI, mordin solus, samara, kasumi goto, thane krios

kaidan is his partner unless otherwise stated; in some AUs (i.e. fanart or fanfic pieces), he may be with garrus or joker. garrus and joker count as his best friends, too, but for the sake of clarity they aren’t listed there.

tidbits

romantic traits:

he is the little spoon (and the bottom).

his love language is touch, but he doesn’t initiate physical contact often.

he’s clingy, but not overbearing.

he’s a bit dense. not to the extent that it makes him seem stupid, but enough to cause unnecessary pining.

he’s rather inexperienced; growing up on the streets had him too occupied with surviving, and by the time he’d hit adulthood, he joined the alliance. this became his sole purpose and he didn’t have much interest in pursuing romantic relationships.

disposition-related traits:

in me1, he seeks diplomatic solutions to problems, only resorting to violence when unavoidable. he often tries to avoid pursuing revenge or anything similar, but this is slightly shaken when he meets toombs & wayne. he convinces toombs to let wayne be arrested rather than killed solely because he does not want toombs to become wrapped up in chasing closure through killing just as he has.

 in me2, he still tries to be a good person, but his patience with those who become his enemies is rather thin. he doesn’t hesitate to threaten/intimidate his enemies, but he also tries to help civilians and similar people. as he’s very on edge given that he’s been forced to work with the same people that slaughtered his entire unit on akuze, he’s quick to defend himself and his allies. he will pursue those who threaten him or those he cares for because he doesn’t want to risk their lives regardless of cost; he feels largely at fault for the destruction of the normandy sr1, and this causes an obsession with eliminating potential threats.

in me3, he shoots first and asks questions later. he doesn’t accept any risks to himself and his crew. the invasion of the reapers despite his warnings has caused him to fall into a constant state of anxiety; these are the same entities he’s had nightmares about for years. he’s distrustful, brutal, and protective, but not evil. this is an important point, as a lot of his inner turmoil centers around his growing anger and worsening violent tendencies. he tries his best to protect the innocent, but acknowledges the occasional need for sacrifice. he will make these sacrifices if it eliminates something he perceives as a threat. this is, again, mainly a trait of post-traumatic stress disorder.

misc. traits:

due to being biotic, he eats a ton of food, and often steals the leftovers of his crew. this is something they learn the hard way; they either finish their food in one sitting, or they get their leftovers stolen by their Feral Biotic Commander™️.

he really, really enjoys tending to the fish tank in his cabin. it’s therapeutic for him. 

collecting model ships becomes a special interest hobby after his two-year coma. he enjoys setting up their displays and learning about various ships.

he has trust issues—but not towards other people. he distrusts himself and his ability to protect his crew.

he falls for kaidan in me1 but doesn’t ever confess his feelings on account of alliance regulations (and the fear of rejection). in me2, he pines for him, but the encounter on horizon causes a rift between them. in me3, he tries constantly to prove himself to kaidan, yearning for the trust he’d placed in him so many years ago.

there’s more, but it’s 4am and i can’t think straight anymore. plus this is also like a huge fucking wall of text already. so enjoy 👍

[thetrashbagswasteland]

truth or dare 🍬❄️🪲 :3c

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character Going straight for the jugular i see hmm well let's go with this one: Shepard's story is sus as hell when the story of ME1 is viewed without Main Character Plot Armour and a paragon shepard should acknowledge that they have no right to be believed without a shred of evidence aside from "this one dude said so" ❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best? hmmm I cannot say WHO I want to write it best because everyone I can think of would bring a new and chewable aspect to it but... full length interspecies political thriller set pre-canon no I don't know whether yes-reapers or a no-reapers AU would be more fun but I wanna see what the inner machinations of galactic politics and how everyone's disparate political regimes fit together 🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here Here have two paragraphs of The Longshot boy oh boy that didn't take like an hour for my brain to give in and write at all

Huerta was nondescript in the blandly welcoming way that every hospital and medical office Castis had had the misfortune of visiting was. Large windows looked over over-cultured gardens, pretending to capitalise on the closest thing to natural light as could be found on the station. And yet the scent of thessian flowers permanently maintained in bloom didn’t quite mask that of death and antiseptic, unnatural dying any more than the quiet, culturally soulless music tinkling from hidden speakers hid the sounds of people going through the very worst times in their lives. Turian hospitals were far more austere on the whole and, by extension, infinitely more practical. How much time was wasted cleaning windows that could be better spent ensuring the sterility of the wards? How much of their budget was piled onto soft, meaningless comforts whilst practicality went hungry?

[sparatus]

What one of your works do you suggest someone start with?

honestly frankly given i have over 120 works on ao3 it's hard to rec anything when i dont know your preferences or anything, i don't know if you want longfic or one-shots or story-focused works or ship stuff or au or what. my pinned post is my current main wips so a good starting point is looking at that for the serieses i'm working on and seeing if those appeal to you, or just going to my works page and filtering by ship or character or what have you. you know what you want buddy idk what to tell you i have a lot of works and predominantly write niche shit

that said, i'll group a few recs by length, just to make this easier. all titles are links.

one-shots:

"Prince With a Thousand Enemies" (8.7k), and its companion piece "To Be Loved, To Be Loved" (7.2k); Sparatus/OC, backstory work

the I'll Follow You series; Desabrudas, pre-canon, backstory work

"The Demon"; Morinth & Samara, pre-canon

"A Luncheon Most Foul" (7k), aka "wives club"; Aediteia Epirian & Nautilea Victrilianus, OC-centric

"When the Lights Go Down" (3.8k); Kryterius, post-canon

"The Driver" (5.7k); turian OC-centric, Sparatus's staff

"Still on Patrol" (3.7k); turian OC-centric, naval horror

"run, boy, run" (5.8k); Kryterius, pre-canon, pre-relationship

"Roots in the Riverbed" (2.2k); salarian OC-centric

chapter fics:

To Catch a Rabbit; 11 chapters, 82k, Kryterius murder mystery mission fic, complete, sequel in progress

Serpents in the Garden; 4 chapters, 16.2k, pre-ME1 Council political intrigue and conspiracy

The Silence is Killing Me; 4 chapters, 14.5k, post-ME1 Sparatus dealing with PTSD from the Destiny Ascension crisis

Broken Mirror; 77 chapters, 334k, no-Reapers AU, large cast, Saren isn't the villain, first in an ongoing series with 2 sequels complete and 2 more underway

In Retrograde; currently in progress, OC-centric, rewrite of an older OC series co-written with xMidnightSun

that's all you're getting for summaries you're just gonna have to trust me on these

broken mirror and the rest of its series are the main thing i always want people to read but i acknowledge the first third of it shows its age a lil and also 334k is A Lot. but also the first sequel following it (blood in the water) is one of my magnum opuses i think and im frequently told is the best in the series so far So There. also the companion novella to the big second arc (the weight of memory) is easily some of my best shit. but yeah 334k is a big ask so probably start with silence serpents or rabbit if you want to start with the chaptered works and go from there.

[antivanruffles]

Who: Corinne Shepard/Kaidan Alenko

Rating: T

Tags: pre-relationship, ME1, feelings realization, canon divergence,

Summary: Three times Kaidan helped Shepard realize that being different wasn't always a bad thing.

A/N: Some Shenko fluff for the Year of the OTP event. Ailin belongs to @cursedwithgloriouspurpose. Both Ailin and Corinne are part of our Family Matters AU, you can read more of that HERE you like.

____________________________

The first time she realized Kaidan was different, it was because she felt heard.  

Corinne, as her sister, Ailin, would always happily point out, was a nerd. She had never been the most socially adept person, it just wasn't her strength. She had grown into her rank and title to (hopefully) become an effective leader, but that didn't mean it got any easier to deal with people. It just meant she could play the role and follow regulations. She still felt like an awkward teenager sometimes, jealous of her sister's natural social graces.  But not every situation followed the regs and people rarely went by protocol; they were generally unpredictable, and full of surprises. Which was why Corinne had always preferred tech and machines and math, that was straightforward, never messy or confusing. Corinne always knew what she could expect. 

That was why she had become an engineer. It just made sense. Even if she couldn't be totally sure she was a good commander, a good leader, she could say she was a damn good engineer. In that regard she had blossomed in the Alliance, with all the newest toys at her disposal. She no longer had to scrounge and save, buying used parts to piecemeal something together. Something that was always an approximation and never at its best. That was why she was so utterly infatuated with the Normandy. Everything about it was a marvel, top of the line, and cutting edge. Nothing piecemeal about it. She would spend hours going over the ship from tip to tail if she could. The newest toy she could imagine. It gave her something to obsess over and something to talk about. Much to Ailin's chagrin. 

Corinne often could be found poking around various parts of the ship, tinkering and learning all she could about it. So it was that Kaidan stumbled over her one day, and simply asked her what she was doing; clearly amused at finding the commander lodged half way under a console like a grease monkey under the hood of a transport ship. 

She didn't think about her reply, just answered his question as she shimmied out to fully look at him. Her answer wasn't diluted, just an honest response with more technobabble than she might use with her sister. Not to discredit her sister, because Corinne knew Ailin was capable and smart, but she didn't really care about how tech or machinery worked, just so long as it did. Because of that Corinne was used to a certain level of detachment when she babbled about the more intricate workings of something. Not that Ailin wouldn't listen, just that after a certain point her eyes would start to glaze over even as she nodded encouragingly. 

Kaidan, however, listened intently, asking questions as she spouted off more and more facts and anecdotes about the marvel of the SR-1. Eventually Corinne came to herself and realized she had gone off on a tangent even Adams would find tedious. She rose slowly from where she had been crouched on the ground and awkwardly rubbed her hands on her thighs, uncaring of the streaks of grease and crime she left behind.

She didn't expect malice, only a certain brand of boredom that she had grown accustomed to over the years when she got too carried away. Corinne could feel the embarrassment settling in, worried she had taken up too much of Shenko's time, and it was only because he was too polite to interrupt his commanding officer that he hadn't stopped her to tell her she was rambling. 

"Sorry," she said to the floor. "I didn't mean to take up so much of your time, Lieutenant." 

She looked up at his huffed laugh and found nothing but genuine interest in his eyes. Corinne wasn't used to that. People could be kind, she knew, but it was rare she found someone who managed to keep up with her. It seemed like Alenko had. 

[dutyworn]

I've finally played the Pinnacle Station DLC (LE doesn't have it, but it's an original ME1 DLC that modders have made available for LE) fully, and already decided to integrate it into Wren's blog canon because holy shit she would go do combat simulations to "relax" and get competetive as fuck about it. I think I will time it post ME1 but pre ME2 prologue, so when she gains access to the apartment etc. is post defeating Saren, during the few weeks/months on the timeline before her death in ME2 prologue and the two-year-timeskip. Ochren's grumpy demeanour fits perfectly with Wren doing 12 hours of combat simulations in a row with neverending energy of go again because she needs to have the highest score on everything at all times XD It's like Armax Arsenal but better...

[springagainafter]

Scattered thoughts for Merrick's worldstate:

I will be taking artistic liberties and ignoring much of Liara's third ME1 convo, which will probably send me veering farther away from canon than I like, but oh well.

In ME2 he is absolutely not gonna ask TIM where Liara (or anyone else, but particularly Liara) is. He is going to ask Anderson, who has no idea. (In theory Anderson would know people who know people in asari space who know who/where Liara is, but for the purposes of Drama, I am ignoring that possibility). So surprise, he gets to Ilium and there's Liara!

Garrus will be totally clueless about Merrick and Liara being an item and therefore gets to spend the first part of their reunion on Ilium going "?????" (Kasumi gets to snap him out of it because he's pretty flabbergasted.)

I love the balcony argument in LotSB to bits.

Definitely gonna have to headcanon in an extended LotSB cabin convo and a post-Arrival convo to compensate for the whole "you were dead for two years and now you're back and processing that is Complicated" thing (and the fact that it's been weeks or months for Merrick, and the lifespan thing, etc.) getting swept under the rug in like two minutes in the ingame convo.

I debated on having Kaidan be clueless about the romance until Mars, but I think he'd connect some dots and figure out that they're close before that.

(I have not decided yet if he does circa ME1/pre-Alchera because I'm not sure how if or how much I want anyone having to pretend they don't notice anything at that point - Joker and Dr. Chakwas are obviously going to know but I'm pondering on how they handle that. Ash, in terms of headcanon, at the very least knows that Liara has a big crush. ME3 is a different story because everything's on fire and all my Sheps' romances are open secrets at that point. No PDA in public spaces and the rest of the crew just goes "I see and hear nothing" at anything subtler than that).

[octerminal]

I have a question. In ME1, there are two missions, UNC: The Negotiation, and UNC: Besieged Base, which require 80% Renegade and Paragon points, respectively. Is it possible to get both without modifying the save or exploiting glitches?

Hi anon,

I want to say "probably not" but my actual answer is "I don't know." The thing about receiving the missions at 80% morality should only be true for the first morality you reach, not both. I.E., if you're playing a paragon Shepard and you reach 80% paragon, you'd need to reach 90% renegade afterwards to also unlock UNC: The Negotiation. A lot of decisions that net you the most morality points are also mutually exclusive. You can't both save and kill the Council, you can't both charm and intimidate Saren into committing suicide, etc.

It's worth mentioning that the morality guide says there are 629 total paragon points and 609 total renegade points possible in ME1, and (if I’m reading this part right) that you need about 260 points for 80% and 292 for 90%.

Generally speaking, I dislike using the wiki as a source of information because I find it frequently unsourced or poorly sourced, which prevents me from fact checking the information for myself. But it's a good starting point and it's the only resource I have for this issue because I 100% do not know what number of points corresponds to what percentages or anything else the morality guide covers, and I am way too lazy to fact check all of that for myself. I would recommend using it if this is something you really want to try.

I ran through the page myself and mentally created a Shepard and playthrough to see if this was possible. I did a Colonist/Ruthless Shepard so I started with more renegade points, since you have less opportunities for renegade to begin with. I went renegade on every main mission minus killing the Feros colonists and got 216 points. I got 92 paragon points during the main missions. I tried to stay mainly paragon for the side missions and got 222 paragon and 111 renegade, for a total of 327 renegade and 314 paragon. This puts me at both required thresholds.

The one issue that arises here is that I did not test for whether I'd be able to pass intimidation/charm checks. This would significantly alter how much morality you get, since a lot of big morality gains are locked behind checks. A notable example here is Jeong on Feros. You can get 24 paragon or 25 renegade if you use a check, versus something like little to no morality gain if you’re forced to kill him. But those are locked behind 12 charm and 10 intimidate, which are both fairly far along in the skill bar and thus hard to actually achieve if you play Feros early on.

TL;DR: Seems theoretically possible on first time playthroughs if you’re able to pass certain morality checks, but you'd likely have to micromanage what missions you do and when in order to maximize those checks. You would also likely have to sacrifice roleplaying a consistent Shepard. That being said, this definitely seems feasible on a NG+ playthrough because NG+ retains your skill allocations, so you wouldn’t have to worry about morality checks since a lot of them would already be unlocked from the previous playthrough. So in that scenario: yes, it seems possible to achieve without mods or exploits.

Anyway, I'm not going to pretend I haven't done similar things before* but this doesn't seem particularly worth it to me considering the Noveria exploit nets a lot of points and is very easy to use. I do it on Nadia even though she is fairly consistently renegade without it, just so that I can be sure I can pass intimidation checks without having to worry about it when playing. It's up to you, though, and it’s entirely possible you’re just asking this out of curiosity and not because you actually have any desire to do this, lol.

Hope this helped.

*throwback to when I had to literally plan out missions to get best friend Tali in ME3. I had a doc sheet and everything.

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

RATING: Explicit (Graphic Violence) Word Count: 21k Pairing: Shenko Characters: Female Shepard, Zaeed Massani, Aria T'Loak, David Anderson

“Josie!”

The sounds of his shrieks are muffled, but guttural- hoarse even. It’s a picture of blurred feet kicking and flying in nearly every direction in a desperate attempt to shove them off of him. A flash of violet light in his hands that twines its way up his arms disappearing just as quickly as the sounds of his radius cracking deafens the room. The smell of thick, ebony smoke and burning flesh clogging lungs- and then the taste of iron.

The taste of blood.

“Josie- help! I- need you- to help me-” He cries through huffed gasps of pain. Heavily armored hands close in around him. A blurry pair grasps at a bunch of onyx-colored hair from the top of his head, slamming it against the hefty aluminum refrigerator door. It sends a flurry of drawings, magnets, and half-torn pictures fluttering to the ground like leaves during early Mindoiran autumn. Vermillion streaks from his brow, trailing toward his lips. Armored bodies close in around him, but he pushes himself against the refrigerator with a pained grunt.

Another flash of hazy violet light permeates the room, filling it briefly with the muted sounds of pained moans as the bodies hit the floor- one after another. His hand grabs the table, vaulting himself to his feet with a slight stagger. He begins hobbling- a blurry image limping closer and closer. His eyes are fuzzy as they shift from violet to sable- the edges starting to meld together in a haze of mish-mashed, murky colors. Then, the blur is replaced by a feeling of warmth as his hand reaches down.

“Josie, we have to-“

His voice is cut off by a shriek as his body comes careening down towards the floor. Surprise is replaced by anguish as one of them smashes their boot into his back. His agonized bellows cut throughout the room, as another one of them grabs his right leg and begins dragging him further and further away.

“No- Let- Let me- Josie- Help me!”

An arm reaching out, but it isn’t his. Another flash of violet light that begins snaking its’ way from palm... To wrist… To elbow as the hand tremors violently through the blur. Chipped jade nails covered in dried blood- a bracelet made from multicolored rubber bands loomed together caked in mud. There’s an attempt to focus that light- to use it. Trying to find some way to protect him.

But then the violet light fizzles out just as quickly against the blur. The hand falls as the edges begin to shift from blur to darkness.

“Josie! Please- help- help me!” He screams- a muffled, croaked sound that begins to fade against the edges of the blur. Then, a flash of nails- bloodied claw marks in the wood of the floor made by the resistance of his hands as his body fades further and further away.

The blur is gone now- replaced almost completely by a wave of darkness. The jade-nailed arm feels heavy – a weight that can’t be lifted as a high-pitched noise envelopes the room and the large hydraulic door whooshes open with a soft metallic whir.

“Josie!”

His last shriek.

His last expression is a picture of pain- of anguish- of agony. Through the darkness, his eyes showcase something worse than fear as the hydraulic door slams closed, and his bloodied face disappears into the void.

Then, his final image is replaced by a wave of onyx. The smell of smoke returns- the scent of burning flesh, and the taste of iron. His screams ring over and over through the void of darkness on the other side of the hydraulic door for those few moments as the heaviness settles and breath becomes shallow. He calls again and again, but the words are hollow- nothing more than sounds being swallowed whole by the blackening vacuum.

And then just before the darkness fades to nothingness and the heaviness overtakes, one more sound- one short, resounding crack that deafens the room, echoing for what feels like hours through the darkness.

And the sound of his voice goes silent.

[swaps55]

7 for every part of Opus! 🥰 (Just the main parts, not the multiverse. I wanna know about the muuuusic 🤩)

Oooh, fun!

Writing Ask Meme.

7: Where did the title come from?

Originally, Opus was going to be a single fic. (What is now Cantata was going to be about 4 chapters - cue laughter). I wanted it to be a series of mini-stories that followed a playlist, each chapter themed to a different song, charting the arc of Shepard and Kaidan's relationship. If the chapter titles were going to be based around song titles, I thought it would be neat to name the main fic after a form of music. Initially I picked Concerto, not because it was a thematic fit, but because there was a racehorse in the late 90s I really liked named Concerto. XD

Then the Fake Dating Disaster Fic happened, which was not part of the plan at all. And it needed a name. As I was still thinking about it as an AU, I wanted to pick another form of music for the title. I can't remember how I landed on Sonata, but it just felt like the right fit, so I went with it.

When I finally caved and admitted Sonata was too important not to be part of the "canon" fic, I decided to break the whole thing into pieces, and went to work renaming all the parts. So choosing the names for each story came down to looking up different forms of music (this is not something I am inherently knowledgeable about), and making unscientific choices based on what felt right, and/or what had a meaning that was a loose thematic fit. So I ultimately landed on (with links to respective playlists):

Cantata (pre-ME1)

Concerto (ME1)

Sonata (post-ME1)

Fugue (Alchera + 2 year gap)

Mezzo (ME2)

Requiem (ME3)

Nocturne (post-ME3)

Cadenza (Multiverse AU)

(The playlists for Mezzo-Nocturne have very WIP playlists - the outlines are a mess right now, and Cadenza's playlist kind of "unofficial" at the moment, since I don't really know what Cadenza is yet.)

And since I needed a series name, I went with Opus, as the series is definitely my magnum opus. :D

[ljandersen]

Do you think Kaidan also went through N training at some point? I've seen fics where he's apparently gone through it, but couldn't find anything in canon about it.

Hi, anon! Ooh, a question. Fun! Thank you for thinking of me.

Do I think Kaidan is N-trained?  In short, no.

There isn't evidence disproving that he's N trained, but there isn’t evidence suggesting he's N trained either. If anything, the lack of any indication he has N training is proof in itself.

For one, none of the characters associated with N training ever include Kaidan as if he’s a member. James goes to Shepard with his N questions. He never mentions or refers to Kaidan's experience. Neither Anderson nor Shepard mention Kaidan being N trained.

It's not mentioned in his background anywhere. It's said he has over a dozen special commendations. He does get involved in special operations, even leading the first Special Operation Biotic Company, but this doesn't require an N designation.  Unless he failed out before qualifying as a N1, it seems like something that would be included in his history.  

In ME1, he specifically says he’s been holding back up to this point in using his biotics offensively.  Jenkins is the first soldier he’s lost to hostile action.  None of these suggest to me someone who’s undergone rigorous N spec ops training, where holding back would probably limit being accepted.  Some N operatives may not have seen someone die due to hostile action, but it’s at least more likely with a N trained operative than a general marine.  It seems like Kaidan is still coming into his own in biotic combat in ME1.

If anything, I wonder if health concerns over his L2 implant may not disqualify him.  N operatives frequently lead high-risk, high-priority missions either independently or in charge of a small groups. The whole mission hinges on that one person. Having a serious pre-existing health condition, especially one triggerable on the field (light, sound, stress, etc.), would be a serious concern. 

 While he may function well on a team or even in a leadership position commanding a unit, I think special forces may rely heavier on single-person performance under high-strain situations.  Conditions on those high risk N missions maybe be more likely to trigger an attack than typical combat.   Alone, disabled, and with the whole mission riding on him achieve a specific task, it could be disastrous.

Even if was accepted to apply, I don't know if he could pass N training with his health condition. If Wiki is correct, it says this about N1 training:

"If this is their first time at the school, trainees participate in scenarios experienced by the elite units of most land-based armies; a typical candidate may be in training more than 20 hours a day, leading small units into combat over hostile terrain with little sleep or food. Trainees who do well are awarded an internal designation of N1 and are invited to return."

While Kaidan is obviously a tough person, who's gone through basic and performs well as a marine on the field, I don't know if he could push himself to operate with 4 hours of sleep a day and hardly any food. My sister has terrible migraines, and she has to careful judge her sleep cycle and the timing of her meals. If she doesn't get enough sleep or oversleeps, she gets a migraine. If she misses a meal, she gets a migraine. 

Obviously, Kaidan would face those issues while on the field as a general marine, but I don't think it would be to the same extent as here.  If on the field in these conditions, a migraine could be dealt with, either supported by his team and medication.  Or, if extreme, by evacuation.  As a N candidate under these conditions, a bad migraine affecting his performance would simply disqualify him.

It also says about higher level N training:

"The highest grade of training, N6, provides actual combat experience in conflict zones throughout the galaxy. From day one, invitees are given basic gear, then separated and stranded on an asteroid with no nav data. The test ends when the last person runs out of oxygen. The first few are out of the program. If the trainee survives these scenarios in "admirable and effective fashion," they finally receive the coveted N7 designation."

I imagine every N operative enters training with the intention of becoming a N7. No one thinks, "Yeah, I'll join, but I only want to be a N4." Everyone is shooting for the top. In that case, if Kaidan wanted to become a N7, that means he'd be stranded alone on an asteroid and rationing oxygen. I think the hypoxia alone could be a huge trigger for a bad migraine.

Overall, I don't think there's any evidence to suggest Kaidan entered N training. Moreover, I suspect he may not qualify due to health concerns. If he did qualify, I don't know if he'd get pass the extreme conditions to get even a N1 designation.

Now that sounds like I'm looking down on Kaidan and what he can do having a migraine condition, but I'm really not. He obviously has found a way to function effectively as a marine. He assures Shepard he won't be a burden on the crew, if Shepard was worried.   He received all those commendations and jumps up the ranks fast.  He obviously functions well and deserves his position as a marine.  But the military is strict with health limitations, and I think N training may be the point where the line is drawn.  It’s just too risky for him and the mission.

I think what opportunities Kaidan lacks due to his L2 implant, he makes up for with his outstanding leadership skills, level-headed resourcefulness, and intuitiveness for politics and tact.  Through ME1, he is frequently dissecting Council and Alliance motivation and power-plays.  He’s open minded, fair, and progressive in the larger picture, long-term goals of the Alliance.  He takes time considering all of the political players involved and giving the benefit of a doubt to aliens in their actions toward humanity.  

To me, he makes an excellent candidate for Spectre for his political saavy in addition to his leadership skills, lack of racial bias, self-accountability, determination, and independent decision making.  He thinks for himself beyond blindly accepting orders.  He is willing to take those convictions to the level of breaking rules and confronting superiors.  Those are important for a Spectre, and his moral self-accountability will ensure he has proper discernment in how he uses his powers.  He obviously has good fighting skills and ability to lead on the field despite his health condition, because he jumps so many Alliance ranks.  He learns to Reave and is teaching other spec op biotics.  He’s very capable both on a political intellectual level and physically with skills and ability.

While he may not, in my opinion, match well with the rigors and high-intensity of N training, he’s an exceptional option for a high leadership positions within the Alliance and for promoting galactic interests as a Spectre.  

Thank you for the ask!!!

[smokedanced]

consider this a meme call for my mass effect muses.  or an interaction call in general if you’d rather plot! i’ve still not added them officially, yet (i’m not done playing the third game) but seeing as that’s where 99 percent of my muse has gone... unfortunately i do not have au verses so anything would be happening within the mass effect universe; however, i am flexible with canon and meshing with other fandoms is fine. as long as i can keep the general background story for my muses, i don’t care about small details like what year everything’s happened or if there are other alien species in the galaxy etc. i also don’t care whether you know about mass effect or not, and you can always have your muse just sucked into a parallel universe and not have them know either, if that makes it easier.

PLEASE SPECIFY AT LEAST YOUR MUSE (or give options). if you don’t specify mine i will pick or send memes from both.

commander wren shepard: primary muse. earthborn, sole survivor, infiltrator, mostly paragon. will default on mass effect 2 timeline; available for me3 up until priority: rannoch, available for me1, available selectively for pre-game (earlier military career; if delaying timeline where she didn’t enlist immediately when she turned eighteen, can plot for pre!military petty crime earth era). flexible with a lot of the world state/choices made if relevant to your muse. jaimie alexander faceclaim.

garrus vakarian: secondary muse. mass effect 2 post!archangel default timeline for me!muses & pre-game c-sec for non-me!muses (probably), open for archangel era, me1, early me3.

like for me to send you memes, message me (waywarded#6194 preferred but tumblr ims work if you don’t use/aren’t comfortable with discord) to plot!

[bardofheartdive]

3 OTP* Questions

* Actually doing my OT3 because I want to and I can!

Another tag from a million years ago (my e-mail notification is from February 29th of last year) that I am only now getting to. This one is from @ronqueesha - thank you for your patience! I’ll tag (only if you want to play) @alyssalenko, @bagog, @mallaidhsomo, and @swaps55. No pressure!

Veerla Shepard / Donovan Lír / Kaidan Alenko

(art by the fantastic @mooreaux​!)

1. How did they first meet?

Donovan and Kaidan were the first to meet, several years pre-canon when Donovan had just signed on with Alliance and Kaidan was a red sand addict following BAaT. Donovan played a big part in getting Kaidan out of that life and they stayed friends from then on.

Veerla and Donovan met while they were both working for CODA (my Alliance CIA). Veerla was on a mission and needed support for part of it. Donovan’s status as CODA agent with extensive military history got him the assignment. They worked well together and liked each other, so a while later Donovan requested her for a similar role in one of his jobs. That one went sideways fast and the fallout bonded them significantly.

Veerla and Kaidan first met on the Normandy during Mass Effect 1. Her universe is extensively AU and she doesn’t stay on the Normandy but they do cross paths several times throughout “ME1″ and develop something of a professional friendship during that time.

2. Were they immediately interested / attracted, or did that come later? / 3. What did they think of each other at first? (I also answered these together!)

Donovan was not attracted to Kaidan at all when they first met. Besides the fact that he was dating and in love with someone else at the time, he saw Kaidan as someone who was lost and needed a friend. At the time, there was too much of a difference in power for him to find Kaidan attractive.

Kaidan was immediately attracted to Donovan, though he also resented him somewhat. He was in a bad place and was jealous of Donovan having everything he wanted, a job he enjoyed, a committed partner, a good relationship with his family, etc.

Veerla and Donovan were both immediately attracted to each other, however they both knew neither of them were in a position to commit to relationship. Both of them have complex personal histories and careers that make it hard to maintain relationships. They started with casual flirting then friendship, which deepened over time as they put in the work on themselves to be good partners, until they were ready to take the plunge into a meanful relationship. 

Kaidan thought Veerla was pretty but had no intentions of pursuing. He wasn’t looking for a romantic relationship at the time. He also found out pretty soon after their meeting that she and Donovan were together so even if he had been interested, he wouldn’t have made a move.