#so now i can just play some geoguessr til i fall sleep. peace out
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sumatriptan + pain meds + a massage from rafi relieved the migraine enough for me to clean up after dinner, do dishes, take out the trash, do my PT, and shower. so basically i became a functional person. except that now instead of my usual cheerful jock mentality, i'm going, "oh god. i literally have to do a fucking baseline of 30 to 90 minutes of exercise every fucking day for the rest of my fucking life until i fucking die. and i literally can't slack off about it like normal people can because if i do then my body will wreck its entire shit on purpose for fun bc it fucking hates me. i am in purgatory and/or hell forever and i hope death comes to take me sooner rather than later because oblivion is better than this eternal imprisonment"
which is to say:
i may, in fact, still have a migraine.
#my outlook on PT when i don't have a migraine: omg i'm capable of moving for 90 minutes this is so exciting i'm gonna have 10000 adventures#my migraine outlook on PT: if existence is nothing except being forced daily into situations you don't want to be in then#is death not simply the logical answer. asking for a friend.#anyway i'm fine. i just got so wildly upset that i had to spend energy on showering bc exercising made me drip sweat.#i was like this TAKES ADDITIONAL PHYSICAL EFFORT and i DONT WANNA FUCKING DO IIIIIT#suicide m#i GUESS#autoimmune tag#pt tag#i did exfoliate and wash my hair and put on lotion and get cozy in bed tho.#so now i can just play some geoguessr til i fall sleep. peace out
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