#so me being upset that i have to take a break from something ive been procrasinating and somethign thats been stressing me out isnt importan

[sakebytheriver]

...

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

hiii i love ur fics idk if ur requests are on rn but can u do a short drabble of the tiktok trend where the guy hasn't ask his gf to be his valentines day so she "put him on sale" as a joke ofc but she's like

BF FOR SALE ($3.50)

- amazing cook

-crusty feet

- will buy anything u want

any character is fine but i would love katsuki or shoto!!

LMFAOOOO this is for sure the funniest ask ive gotten yet😭😭😭 this is so cute !! and very long overdue I apologize writer block devil was rlly kickin my ass😞 valentines been over but yk i had to write this ! i was rlly hesitating between writing for shoto or katsuki and then i realized i could write for BOTH OF THEM!! and so i did ! i tried honoring your request as best i could, hope you like it <3 !

no pronouns mentioned, pure tooth rotting nasty fluff, use of petnames (my love for shoto and sweets, babe and idiot (lol) for katsuki), katsuki is an asshat but when isn’t he, shy katsuki, shoto is a bit of an airhead, kissing, biting, reader is petty asl lol, lemme know if i missed something else !

todoroki shoto ♥︎

“yn, my love.”

“yes, shoto ?”

the corners of shoto’s mouth pull into a tiny frown at the usage of his first name. no baby, no hun, not even sho. just shoto.

“did i do something to upset you ?” he asks carefully from his spot at the foot of your dorm bed he seems to be stuck at, he can’t bring himself to move until he knows if you’re actually mad at him, and he has an inkling you are.

you look up at him for no longer than a second then look back down at your phone screen “what makes you think that ?” you question back nonchalantly.

“you posted something on your tiktok account..” shoto doesn’t have a clue how to have this conversation with you and it makes him a little nervous, he regrets not going to izuku for advice after all.

“mhmmmm~” you hum, urging him to continue knowing damn well you know what he’s going to say. you wanted to hear him say it himself.

you know shoto’s had no previous relationships before you so these type of things probably don’t mean as much to him as they do to you, but doesn’t everyone want their boyfriends to ask them to be their valentine ? you sure do, and your boyfriend hadn’t asked you to be his yet, so as petty as you know you were being at the time you posted the tiktok he’s no doubt here for right now.

shoto feels like a criminal on trial desperately trying to plead his case with you being the judge. tentatively, he asks “ you said you were..putting me up for sale ?”

immediately it’s like a switch had been flipped. you place your phone down onto your bed next to you, shoto wishes he could take your phone’s place. you cross your leg over the other and bring your hands together like a super villain revealing their master plan “yes. yes i did.”

“oh.”

silence. nothing.

shoto tried—he’s trying. he’s trying so insanely hard to make sense of everything that is you but he simply can’t. he breaks eye contact to think of more to ask but his attention is quickly pulled back to you when he hears you whine.

“uuuuughhh shotoooo~” you moan, throwing your head back against the headboard. “you’re not supposed to say ‘oh’ !” you’re face changes from grumpy to deadpan as you lower your voice slightly to try and mimic him. on any other day this would’ve made him laugh but he’s beyond lost at this point. he clears his throat before speaking again.

“ i don’t know what i’m supposed to say—or what i did for you to want to sell me.” he thinks “and for 3 dollars at that.”

you let out a laugh when you process his words and shoto’s shoulders magically feel lighter at the sound. carefully, he slides a little closer to the side of your bed so he can stand at your bedside. little by little. you pretend you don't notice.

"it's what you deserve for not askin' me to be your valentine."

the secret’s finally out and you get to see how the cog wheels in his head are starting to turn in real time, it has you holding back a giggle when he looks up at you like a deer in headlights.

“is that..why you were mad ?” you nod, humming out a playful mhmm

“ya really hurt my feelings you know ? to think my own boyfriend wouldn’t ask me” you clench your fist over your heart and fake sob dramatically.

shoto huffs out a laugh, relieved to see you’re not actually mad, and goes to sit down on your bed. he tentatively reaches for your hand and squeezes it twice when you let him hold it. before bringing it up to his lips and placing a sweet little kiss to it. it feels as if pop rocks are going off inside of you.

“ i’m sorry for not asking you to be my valentine.” he apologizes, his thumb absentmindedly rubbing your hand “ i was thinking i should’ve, but i didn’t want you to think it was weird since we’re already dating.” his thumb goes to run over your fingers “ i was worried me being too intense would scare you off.” he mumbles.

your eyebrows furrow, you lean towards him to make him look at you “ you wouldn’t scare me off, who told you that ?”

“kaminari. he said ‘coming on too strong scares away the babes.’ ” shoto quotes

you sigh. of course it was that bigmouth portable charger filling his head with this stuff.

you pull your hand out of his grasp and he looks up to protest but you grab his face in your hands before he can say anything, you can practically see him start melting at the contact as he blinks at you slowly, he reminds you of a cat.

“sho” you purr, rubbing his cheeks “ rule number one is never ever listening to kaminari’s dating advice. most of the time it is very wrong.” you explain.

shoto presses his mouth to the palm of your hand “yeah, i’m starting to regret that now.” he speaks into it, you snort. he leans in closer to press a sweet kiss to your lips and you reciprocate, pressing a few more kisses on his lips for good measure “ i’m really sorry for not asking you.” he says in between pecks. you hum in response to him placing even more kisses all around your face. “s’okay. i’m also kinda sorry for putting you up for sale.” you say, running your fingers through his hair while he places kisses on your shoulder.

he lifts his head up to look at you then, an eyebrow raised with an amused expression on his face “kinda sorry ?” he asks.

you nod “mhm. kinda sorry.”

he chuckles to himself, then gets up so he can climb into bed next to you. when he’s positioned how he likes it, with his head in your lap while you comb through his hair with your fingers, he sighs peacefully “well, it wasn’t all bad. i’m glad you think i’m a good cook.”

“what about the crusty feet ?”

“i’m choosing to ignore that part.” shoto smirks lightly to himself when he hears you laugh at his joke, clearly proud of himself for it. “and i will buy you anything you want, to make it up to you.”

“i don’t need you to buy me anything, sho” you roll your eyes with a lovesick smile “ all you gotta do is ask.”

he blinks up at you, looks off the the side as if he’s deep in thought, and suddenly gets off your lap to sit right in front of you. you never think you’ll get over how pretty your boyfriend is and being reminded of it with how close he is to you makes you flustered. he leans in to kiss you passionately and you don’t know if it’s the love he pours into it or the lack of air that has you so dizzy, you don’t dwell on it.

when he pulls away he’s looking at you like you hung up the stars in the sky and he simply, almost shyly smiles at you and asks.

“ will you be my valentine ?”

bakugou katsuki ♥︎

you did not expect katsuki to come barging into your dorm room five minutes after you’d posted your tiktok. the loud sound of someone banging on your door and proceeding to let themselves in seconds later causes you to let out a squeak.

in comes katsuki, phone tightly clutched in his hand and the moment his eyes zeroed on you he’s like a bull charging at a red flag. he stands right in front of you, angry frown on display before he shoves his phone in your face.

“explain this. now.” he growls, you have to hold back a laugh, keeping your face as calm as possible you look between him, his screen then back at your phone.

“what’s confusing about it ? i thought i was being pretty straight forward.”

his eye twitches. “why the hell did you put me up for sale ?! and for three dollars and fifty fuckin’ cents ?!” he exclaims, you can’t help the snort that bursts out of you, though katsuki doesn’t look as amused as you are.

“explain.” he deadpans.

“i think you can figure it out.” you shrug back.

he mutters insults to himself that you can’t catch “well obviously fuckin’ not, cus I wouldn’t be askin’ you if i did.” you simply shrug and look back at your phone. “i wrote it in the caption.”

it takes him a second to process then he’s tapping his password and opening the clock app at super sonic speed. his eyebrows furrow and you see him tapping away at his phone. his eyes widen when he reads your caption and he looks down at you with a mix of desperation and disbelief.

“you’re mad cus I didn’t ask you to be my valentine ?” your bratty huff and turn to the side as you shrug again is all the answer he needs. he looks at you for about 5 seconds longer then sighs.

he sits down on your bed and keeps staring. katsuki bakugou hates a lot of things and one of those things is you ignoring him. a warm hand on your ankle startles you and you can’t even ask him what he’s doing before your being yanked towards him. you squeal, almost missing the smirk on his face or the huff of laughter at your reaction. almost though, so you glare at him. katsuki looms over you until your noses almost touch, then you turn away with a huff. he chuckles, pressing his lips to your neck.

“ yer such a baby, y’know that ?” he mumbles, smirking against you neck. you huff but make no effort to shrug him off “ no i’m not, jerk. is it so wrong for me to want my boyfriend to ask me to be his valentine’s ?” you grumble, trying to ignore the feel of his warm lips against your skin, it’s not working so well for you.

“s’not what i’m sayin, sweets” he nips at your earlobe “‘m sayin’ ya coulda just told me ‘stead of bein’ a baby about it.” you can’t tell if this is his way of trying to apologize. either way, you don’t want to give in just yet.

“i’m not supposed to tell you to ask me to be your valentine’s katsuki, that’s not the point~ !” you huff petulantly. you feel a but childish but, c’mon ! it’s a given to have your boyfriend as your valentine and it wouldn’t hurt your demon spawn of a boyfriend to be a little but romantic once in a while.

he playfully rolls his eyes at you “see, what’d i tell you? big baby.” leaning forward he nips at your nose making you groan and trying to push him away with your palm. katsuki being the powerhouse that he is, doesn’t budge. “ i didn’t think to ask ya cus you’re already mine. so why should i need to ask something that’s a given ?”

your heart beats faster at his words and katsuki takes his chance when he feels you loosing up more and more. suddenly he’s got your wrists in his grip, holding them above you and looking down at you with that sickeningly handsome smirk. you’re almost there, he can practically feel it.

“i—i’m..still mad at you” you stutter out weakly, your defenses are down.

“yeah ?” he taunts.

“yeah. apologize.”

he scoffs, rolling his eyes lightheartedly “why should i apologize ? you said my fuckin’ feet stink.”

“ ah, ah, ah.” you tut “don’t put words in my mouth, i said your feet were crusty.”

“yeah, thanks babe. that makes it so much better.” he sasses, you laugh “and i complimented you ! i said you were an amazing cook !”

“yeah but that ain’t a compliment, ‘ts a fact.” he says matter of factly, you’re eyes threaten to get stuck at the back of your skull with how hard you roll them and he snickers.

he dives in and steals a kiss, and then another one when you don’t stop him. when he pulls away to catch his breath, ready to steal another kiss you stop him by placing your hand on his chest. he looks down at you questioningly and you give him a raised brow in response. he groans.

“fine. m’sorry” he concedes quietly

“foooorrr ?” you urge.

he narrows his eyes at you as if saying “don’t push it” but swallows his words down “ for not askin’ you to be my valentine’s or whatever the fuck” he shoves his now hot face into your neck and mumbles “now quit bein’ all pissed at me.”

you’re happy enough with that, so you wrap your arms around his neck, one of your hands creeping up his nape and into his hair. he sighs contentedly, clearly enjoying the attention you’re giving him.

“thank you. i’m also sorry for saying you have crusty feet.” hearing him scoff at the accusation makes you giggle “and for putting you up for sale.” he hums, happy with your apology.

“..kinda.”

“oi.” he warns. you giggle in response continuing your ministrations in his hair.

“you still haven’t asked me so..” you trail off. he lifts his head up to look at you with a blond eyebrow raised.

“ does this valentine shit really matter that much to you ?” he asks.

you respond immediately “yes.” nodding aggressively to make your point.

he sighs, shaking his head. he looks at you, then looks off to the side in embarrassment, he can be so cute when he wants to be. steeling his nerves he looks you straight in the eyes. fearless with fierce red cheeks and all.

“b-be my valentine, idiot..”

[drewsprincessy]

loving you was hard.

warnings: angst, heartbreak, anger, crying, mentions of sex, lmk if i missed any!

summary: rafe and reader are in love, but rafe struggles to accept it, he doesnt believe in love.

rafe cameron x female reader

part two.

it had been weeks since the incident at the party you and rafe argued at. you finally stopped thinking about him, but he definitely never stopped thinking about you. he sent you countless dms, even texted you off 7 different numbers that he created just to try and contact you.

he was a complete mess. he hadn't showered in days, he was snorting cocaine like there was no tomorrow, and he was drinking like he never wanted to wake up. he didnt care though, he had one thing on his mind. that was you.

he cried for days and nights, crying himself to sleep. and some nights he wouldn't even sleep.

he was beyond guilty. guilty for upsetting you, making you cry, he felt like he was going to die if he didnt get you back. he loved you, and with this time being away from you, he sees that. he didnt deserve you, he took your kindness for granted, and he wishes he would have been a better man for you. he wishes he really would've commited to you, because he sees now that these chicks do nothing for him. he doesnt even get turned on by the thought of anyone but you.

you'd be sitting in your room, brushing your hair at your organized vanity, and you hear your phone buzz. you pick it up, and see a no caller id. you pick up, curiously. you click the button to put it on speaker

"hello?" you speak into the phone

"y/n. its me, please let me come over. okay? i know you've seen the dms ive been sending you, baby please. let me come over and explain."

you go quiet for a moment, contemplating whether or not you should let him. after a moment of thought, you speak. "um yeah come over."

without another word, rafe hangs up and runs out the house. having to run back in to grab his keys. he comes back out his house and brings his motorcycle's engine to life. he then speeds off into the night, following the route to your house.

he gets there and knocks 3 times, and paces around impatiently.

you open the door with ur hairbrush still in hand, you stand there awkwardly waiting on him to say something.

he scratches the back of his neck, and stutters over his words "uh, can i- um come in?"

you sigh softly "um yeah sure" you step out of the way to let rafe in, you watch as he immediately makes his way through the doorway.

you make your way down the hallway, and open the door to your bedroom. he steps in first, and you follow.

you're the first to break the silence "so, what did u wanna talk about?" you say as you set your hairbrush down on your vanity.

"Uh, I wanted to say that I'm sorry... for a lot of things, well one because um I haven't been the best person to you. and I know your angry because I can't commit to a relationship, and you have every right to be... but for you I want to try. I wanna try to be in a relationship y/n. for you. like none of that hooking up with other girls shit or nuthin.. I want you. just you"

"rafe..i dont want u to just try. if the same thing happens again i dont know if my hearts gonna be able to take it.."

"i know princess, im not gonna do that shit again. a'ight? cmere let me hold you."

as you step closer to him, you can't help but wonder if hes really going to change this time..

-

a/n: this part is sooo rushed sorry in advance :(

[moonstruckme]

Hello you wonderful, WONDERFUL creation of brilliance! I have another request for the 1k if thats alright.

I think it would be two ghosts?? But its reader x remus (again) where she know hes a werewolf without being told and uses halloween to tell/show him because she can see how guilty he feels for not telling her and scared to tell her.

How/why she knows and how she tells him is up to you love!!

Thank you love x (hopefully that's coherent, toddlers suck and ive only slept 3hrs 😭)

Thanks for requesting (and omg, I hope the toddler(s) become more manageable) <3

join the party

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

Remus comes to the door looking endearingly rumpled. He’s wearing pajama bottoms and a wrinkled t-shirt, his hair is fluffy from lying in bed all day, and his pillowcase has left a faintly pink crease on his cheek. You gather all this from the split second between him opening the door and promptly shutting it in your face. 

“Remus?” you knock again. “Come on, let me in.” 

After a moment in which you can picture him sighing laboriously on the other side, the door cracks open just wide enough for you to see one eye, narrowed with displeasure. Were it anyone else or under any other circumstances, you’d really be quite offended. “What are you doing here?” he asks.

You hold up your bag. “I didn’t think you’d want to face the slew of trick-or-treaters bound for your house alone. I brought movies for us and candy for them. Or, well, the candy can be for both, actually.” 

Remus is silent for a moment, and you press at the door insistently. “Let me in, Rem.” 

He capitulates with a sigh, stepping back to let the door fall open. His apartment is dark, every curtain drawn, and it takes your eyes a second to adjust after stepping out of the sunlight. There’s half a dozen empty takeout containers strewn about the coffee table, and the space has the stale aroma that comes from lack of movement. 

Remus has that aroma, too, you realize as you step closer to him, pressing a kiss to his cheek regardless. He looks like he could use it. 

“Sorry about the mess,” he says dully. “I wasn’t expecting you.” 

“Course you weren’t,” you wave him off. “How could you have been? You’ve been avoiding me all week.”

Remus closes his eyes as if this conversation is already too much for him, and you feel instantly guilty. 

“It’s okay, honey,” you say gently, stacking the takeout containers to clear some space for your candy. “You’re allowed to take some time to yourself. It’d be nice if you’d let me know in the future, but I’m not upset at you. I promise.” 

His features relax slightly, a tension you’d barely noticed around his eyes easing. “Thanks, love. Sorry.” 

“It’s really alright,” you promise, taking him by the hand to pull him down onto the couch with you. “Listen, you seem like you’re not feeling well, so I know you might not want company right now, but would you be open to just having a relaxing night? We can watch Halloween movies and eat sweets, and I’ll handle all the trick-or-treaters.” 

“Yeah?” Remus looks at you with something between hope and sadness, and your heart breaks for him. You squeeze his hand lightly, like your boyfriend is a sponge that you can squeeze all the woe out of and force to absorb your love instead. “That sounds really nice, dove. Thank you.” 

“Course,” you say brightly, and you’re unable to resist pressing your lips to his cheek again before you turn back to your bag, laying your small collection of movies on the table. “Okay, we have some options.” 

Remus hums. “Well, there’s Halloween, the obvious choice.” 

“But too obvious?” you muse. “I mean, we definitely have time to watch more than one, but we only get to watch these at a certain time of year, love. Let’s not be hasty.” He chuckles, and your heart flutters. “I know The Exorcist is a classic, but it might be too scary for me, honestly. Um…Dracula is good…oh! This one’s my favorite.” 

Remus looks to where you’re pointing. “The Werewolf of Washington?”

You pretend you don’t hear the slightly hoarse quality of his voice. “Yup! It’s so funny, and I like that it’s technically a Halloween movie even though werewolves aren’t really scary.” 

He pauses. “You don’t think so?”

You do your best to appear blasé, knowing you have to tread carefully here. “No, of course not,” you say, as if the mere idea is foolish. “I mean, they’re dangerous, sure, but as people, they don’t really mean any harm. It’s not their fault.” 

Remus is being oddly quiet, and you babble on anxiously. 

“If I were a werewolf, I’d hope my friends wouldn’t care about me any less. It’s not like it’s me, it’s just something I have to deal with once a month. I mean, would you stop loving me if I turned out to be a werewolf?”

“No,” Remus says slowly, eyes narrowed to the point where they’re just amber. The circles under his eyes look really dark, you note with concern. You wonder if he hasn’t been sleeping. “Is there something you’re trying to tell me?” 

You take a breath, gnawing on your lip. “I think it’s more about if there’s anything you want to tell me.”

He slouches into the cushions, features slackening in resignation. “Seems like you already know.” 

“I’m sorry to do it this way,” you say genuinely, grateful that he hasn’t pulled his hand from your grip as you run your thumb over his knuckles soothingly. “I know it’s your secret, and you should get to tell anyone whenever you like, but I’ve known for awhile, and when James told me how down you’ve been this week—”

“What,” Remus says sharply, “did James say exactly.” 

“He only told me that you were sick. I asked if you might like a visitor, and he said he thought you’d rather be alone.” Remus sighs, tipping his head back against the couch. You can see the strain of the upcoming full moon on his face, his features pale and gaunt. 

“He didn’t have to tell me, honey,” you say quietly. “I guessed on my own. I know it’s a big deal, and I’m sure it’s been a massive burden for you." You run your thumb tenderly over the dark circles under his eyes. “I just wish you wouldn’t assume it’d be a burden to me, too. Give me some credit here, Lupin.” 

You feel his cheek twitch as he resists a smile, however small. 

“I don’t care, you know,” you go on, emboldened. “I just want to be there for you. It’s killed me not being there for you every month. I’m sorry, love, I couldn’t take it anymore.”

Remus opens his eyes, and your heart swells at the fondness in his gaze, even if it's mingled with wariness. 

“Would you watch some movies with me, please?” you ask enticingly. “Or we can nap, or just sit here. Whatever you want to do.” 

“You sure you want to stick around?” he asks, and you know he’s talking about more than just tonight. “This time of the month is not pleasant. I’m not pleasant.” 

You let your hand slide from his face down to his shoulder, rubbing delicately. “I don’t need you to be pleasant,” you tell him. “I just need you to let me be here.” 

Remus sighs. “Alright, but we’re watching Halloween. That werewolf movie is shit.”

[pupyuj]

CAN WE GET SOME MORE GAEUL CONTENT‼️⁉️

she’s so babygirl that it hurts

I just wanna grab her tiny waist and ruin her haha jk, unless?

i gotchu anon WE NEED MORE GAEUL CONTENT IN GENERAL unpopular opinion but she’s very baby daddy to me too and in this essay i will—i’m joking… THAT’S A DRABBLE FOR ANOTHER DAY EHEHUEE 🤫🤫

OHOHOHO ive’s gaeul-unnie being this strong figure for the little ones :(( she’s their pillar! but when it comes to you all that just evaporates into the air 🫣 she really doesn’t know what it is! every touch, every smile, everything and anything you say to her just makes her mind go blank and before you know it she’s absolutely putty in your hands 😳 it's so amusing to see for the younger members! ☺️ you coming over their dorm without a warning and surprising gaeul w the prettiest flowers and the yummiest donuts that you let the other members snack on, of course 😭 ugh gaeul being so charmed and enamoured that she kinda just lets you do anything you want to her?? ya'll are watching a movie in her room and she has no problem allowing you to pull her to your lap and touch her underneath the blankets... your cold fingertips being such a nice contrast against her warm skin.. how could she not whimper under your touch??

ofc you'd have to tell her to be quiet or else the girls will find out and tease her to no end!! and gaeul does try her hardest, she really does! but her efforts go to waste when you start playing with her tits underneath her shirt and rub her cunt through her panties :< and it looks like she's trying to stop you with the way she's squeezing her legs together and holding onto your wrist as if to pull it out of her shorts but really, she's torn between letting you fuck her completely or just tease her! "love, can i touch you?" you'd ask knowing damn well what the answer would be 😵‍💫 ugh gaeul was so whipped for you that it was her that decided to lay down on the bed and pull you on top of her...

kissing her neck would be enough to completely melt her down! she absolutely loves the way you kiss her :(( it was so addictive! gaeul suddenly grinding her cunt on your thigh when she's usually so patient and actually prefers when you take your time with her?? oh, she must be so desperate to get off! gaeul doesn't even care that she looks so unlike the 'eldest' of the ive family—when you're around, no titles matter to her. just you, and the way you make her feel.

but yeah no, it's totaly so easy to ruin her! with enough degrading words in her ear and about three fingers inside her tight cunt, gaeul would be gone 😵‍💫 just a moaning, whimpering mess underneath you who can't get a grasp of the situation bcs, well, you were just too good at what you do :(( "can you take it, hon?" you'd ask,, which is of course was useless considering gaeul can barely hear her own thoughts with the way you stretched her out while you spread your fingers inside her and the fact that you knew that she can take anything 🫣 "useless.. i was hoping you'd put up more of a fight..." saying this with a pout, deeply upsetting gaeul bcs oh no you were unsatisfied but also turning her on bcs... well, she's a slut for you, what did you expect.

"(y/n)-ah.. more... i can take it... p-please, more..."

"aw, that's right.. good girl." gosh, gaeul could cum from that alone.. her ending up hugging you as you thrusted your fingers inside her in a rapid pace :(( whining in your ear and just begging for you to completely break her bcs she needed it! especially when she has been so busy taking care of the members... being able to relax and be used like this was a blessing and thank fucking god for you while she's at it 🤭

who else is part of the clingy gaeul after fucking agenda bcs hello that's totally her!! refusing to let you go anywhere and practically trapping you underneath her bcs even your aftercare was to die for!! 🥺 but trust that after gaeul has recovered that she'll start something up again! babygirl just needs so much love rn and she knows you can provide that and more 😋💕

[reidsmouthbabys48]

make your move baby

Summary: spencer and y/n have a complicated friendship, spencers imagination overpowers him one night and y/n teases him because what he was imagining made him hard.

Warnings: sub!spencer, virgin!spencer, nerdy!spence, sexual themes, leg humping, slight mommy kink, coming in pants, other small things.

18+ minors do not interact (unless you do I dgaf)

"hi spence" y/n says, walking up beside me. I give her a hopefully subtle once over, she's wearing tight black dress pants and a pink long-sleeved shirt the sleeves are rolled up to her elbows, and her long black hair is pulled back in a ponytail, she's the most beautiful girl I've ever layed eyes on but i can't tell her that, we're to close and the last thing I want to do is ruin what we have.

"Hi, how'd you sleep?" I ask giving her a small smile, she ruffles my hair and I blush as I move my head away, she laughs "you are adorable" she says and i blush even redder.

"Hey guys" Penelope says as we sit down at our desks, "Hello sweetheart" y/n says, quickly looking over at me then smiling at Penelope, I almost didn't see the hint of, amusement? in her eyes.

Almost.

-

Me and y/n are driving to my apartment to hangout and watch a movie, I want to ask why she looked at me like that but I know I shouldn't.

"Why did you uhm look at me like that when you were talking to Penelope?" I ask turning so sideways so I'm looking at her, she shoots me a questioning glance "what are you talking about spence?" She says, her tone is teasing. Maybe im just thinking to much about it.

"Actually N-never mind" I say moving to look back out the window but she puts her hand on my thigh, "what's up with you Spencer? You have been so short with me the past few weeks, did I do something?" She says looking at me, her eyes are filled with hurt and it breaks my heart because that's the last thing I want to do. I need to tell her, we've know each other too long for things to completely fall apart if I confess my feelings.

"No no, y/n you did nothing I would never be upset at you and not tell you why. you know that, it's just I've been trying to figure out my feeling for the last few weeks, I didn't think k I was being short or anything" I sigh, she squeezes my thigh tightly, i know it eas mean in a co.forting wat but its to close to whenr ive imagined her hands at, I grab her hand, "d-dont do that" I say trying to compose myself, she looks at me questoningly then looks down at her hand, removing it from my thigh.

I try my best to think about anything but her squeezing my thigh like that but my mind drifts off and I lose control of my thoughts, I imagine myself under her moaning as she kisses my neck, and rigid me. if only this shit would really happen- "spence?" I hear her voice ring through the air and I jump a bit.

"Y-yea" I mumble praying that she couldn't tell what I was just thinking, she looks at my crotch and a slight smirk appears on her face but she says nothing, I blush.

"Were here, I'll give you a bit to take care of that" the says still smirking, I let out a whine of embarrassment.

"No need to be embarrassed baby it happens to all of us it's natural to have dirty thoughts." She says winking at me, dammit.

"Unless..." she says moving her hand back to my thigh, "you want some help with it" she finishes squeezing my thigh roughly once again, I let out a whimper and bite my lip, embarrassed of the sound that came out of my mouth.

"Yes or no baby?" She asks and I nod "y-yes please, help me" I whine the end of it cutting off into a moan as she palms my bulge over my slacks .

"So responsive" she says and I whimper bucking my hips into her hand for more friction.

"No no baby, get out and go to your apartment" she says and I nod opening the door and immediately slide out of the car.

-3rd person pov-

You get out of the car a few minutes after spencer and slowly walk into the apartment complex, giving him some time to regroup.

Once you get to his apartment you knock on the door, "it's me baby open up" you say and the door immediately opens and you're being pulled inside and shoved into the now closed door, before you could protest his lips are on yours hungrily, you return the kiss, turning you both around and shoving him into the door, he moans at the roughness of your push and you grab his hair causing a low moan to rip from his throat.

You move backwards to his couch, your lips still on his, we both fall onto the couch, he moves to straddle your lap and he starts to kiss you again, "i-i uhm I haven't done anything like this before so I'm sorry if I'm not good" he says looking down at your lap, "baby it's ok" you say and he nods starting to hump your thigh, he moans loudly at the friction provided by your leg and you bounce your knee in time with him coming down on you, making the pleasure he feels almost unbearable, "f-fuck mommy I need to cum, please please I need it so bad" he moans and your eyes widen at the word 'mommy' mixed with his begging, his humping beame quick and frantic, his moans getting louder and louder, "come on be a good boy and cum for mommy baby" you whisper in his ear, moving down to kiss his neck. That's all it takes for the boy to fall over the edge, filling his boxers with his sticky release.

He leans his head into your neck, panting as you card your fingers through his soft hair "mommy?" You ask and he whines.

"Shut up" he says lightly kissing your neck.

"Hey no judgement here baby I just didn't think you were so... kinky" you say and he laughs, "you should see some of the stuff that I imagine when I'm wanking" he says, now you're the one laughing.

-

Ok I'm sorry this probably sucks I haven't had motivation for a long time and I wanted to write something before it left again lmao

[tonydaddingham]

edit 16/04: pouring one out for the bullet theory, you were fun whilst you lasted babes x

okay ive remained sceptical about the 'something in the mouth' thoughts making the rounds but you know what, i love a batshit theory (exactly how batshit, remains to be seen - im fully prepared to eat my words) as much as anyone, so let's take a look.

first off, i truly just thought it might have been a wee bit of slobber. that's fair, right? saliva on aziraphale's tongue, catches the light, whatever. but it's the frame before that one that has me wondering how much weight the theory has:

because in that first one, just as aziraphale's mouth opens, you can see that there is - what looks like - a dark, round object. it doesn't match the surrounding colour and texture of aziraphale's tongue, and then in the next few frames it catches the light in the same exact spot. the highlight is also curved, in such a way that, yeah, it definitely looks like a metallic object.

i know im not breaking new ground when suggesting it contains memories. idk if the object itself is:

a bullet from the rifle in 1941 (although i do doubt it; the calibre it would take would be rather unwieldy to hold in your mouth like this? plus: copper plating - this looks to be steel)

a pistol round from the hitherto-unseen derringer (more likely than the above, and in terms of potential significance of s3 would fit rather nicely in with a 1941 spec of mine regardless: potential crowley discorporation but. it's purely hypothetical), or

a ball bearing (which seems like it would just be a bit anomalous in terms of what props we've seen so far, but who knows. and i feel like if any prop was going to be at most risk of being swallowed accidentally, it's this)

but my current favourite is the derringer round so far. which would indicate that if - big if - crowley were discorporated in 1941, he could potentially have the bullet on him that 'killed' him, so to speak, for the time that follows afterwards.

i'll come back to what memories would be contained within it in a sec, because first, there's the question of whether aziraphale accessed them. if this theory is true (im fully taking this all with a pinch of salt, idk how i actually feel about it yet), i think aziraphale probably accessed them right then and there, as soon as crowley kissed him.

as soon as crowley kisses him, aziraphale looked mighty confused - arguably because of the kiss itself (im predominantly in this camp for the moment), but also possibly because he's just been volleyed something in this wild-ass game of tonsil tennis - before he begins to relax into it. potentially, as he relaxed, that could be when the memories first begin to 'play'.

and then we have the video below - sharpened and at 0.2x speed - that captures after the kiss breaks:

there's a moment, after his mouth presumably is handling around said object and sliding it under his tongue, that his expression clears, and - im sorry, but i'll die on this hill - instead takes on a look of betrayal. it's almost a realisation, a near instantaneous revelation. so let's say he does access the memories during the kiss, has been 'watching' them since the kiss first made contact/the object switched over... what would make aziraphale take on that expression, and react in betrayal and with an 'i forgive you'?

well, i have my thoughts, but let's go back again to the kiss itself. y'all remember this, right?

it suddenly feels a liiiiittle more deliberate that a) aziraphale would reach for crowley's wings, and b) the camera would capture this particular angle. maybe it's not, but again - humour me a sec.

so in terms of what the memory is? that crowley would place inside said object, would make aziraphale reach for crowley's wings, and result in aziraphale's initial upset and then expression of betrayal? the damning "i forgive you", and crowley's responding look of dejection and resignation, followed by "don't bother"? the memory that crowley would see fit to impart in the context of aziraphale choosing to return to heaven - the memory that would fit the scenes that have come before the kiss?

im wondering if it was the fall.

aziraphale sees crowley's fall, responds in sympathy and sadness in the back touch, but then perhaps remembers now/knows now the potential part crowley had to play in it.

now, it could be crowley's own account of the fall that he watches, sure. but we haven't seen that as a possible mechanic in the show - being able to access someone else's memories. we've only seen gabriel accessing his own. but that doesn't preclude that it's possible. however, that would suggest that crowley himself now can't remember his fall etc, which would be weird and potentially open too many loopholes.

alternatively, as others have put forward and would be logical, crowley accessed the records whilst in heaven and found that aziraphale's memories were incomplete. that, for me, would be the more plausible, because im not convinced that aziraphale does remember the fall. he makes references to crowley having 'been an angel once', and that he remembers 'the angel you were', and frankly it's all a little loosy-goosey. it would make wider narrative sense, too, that aziraphale can't remember - heaven doesn't want dissent to become an institutional problem, after all; so what do you do? you wipe away the crucial information that would give the angels any ideas in rebelling just like the fallen did.

if crowley did in fact have something to do with the genesis of the rebellion in heaven, instigated it or played an active, crucial part in it... and aziraphale can't remember that... maybe that is where the 'i forgive you' originates. and why crowley would reply with 'dont bother'. he attempts to make aziraphale understand why he can't go back, and why aziraphale shouldn't go back either, but all aziraphale can now concentrate on is the part that crowley had to play in it... the part that, for good reason, crowley has kept from him all this time.

again, idk how i feel about all this, but i do have to eat humble pie on my initial reservations about the narrative value of the theory and admit that it's compelling. especially as it would have aziraphale return to heaven with full understanding as to what heaven did in cause of, leading up to, and in response to, the rebellion - knowledge that presumably the metatron does not know he has... dangerous for the metatron especially, when you consider that he may have had a bigger hand in it than aziraphale previously thought.

[jiggy-manda]

Six (Jemily)

Alternate ending to the Season 8 Episode 15, Broken.

wc: 3.1k

After the BAU busts the conversion camp, JJ realizes it affected her more than she originally thought.

TW for: mention of homophobia & conversion therapy, drugs/drugging, rape, violence, just a lot of the stuff that happened in 8x15 will be mentioned here, so just a big tw in general. it's not heavily detailed, and none of them are described- its mainly just mentions of certain things and recapping what happened

“Are you ignoring me?”

JJ looked up from the file in her lap and made eye contact with Spencer, his expression full of uncertainty.

“What? No.”

Her eyes flitted back down to the file, her gaze tracing the outline of the writing. She wasn’t mad at Spencer. She wasn’t mad at anyone, really. Well– that’s a lie. She was mad at herself. The case today had only dredged up old feelings she’d sworn she’d buried away years ago.

The camp made her sick. The mere image of those teenagers hooked up to the IV drips was enough to unsettle her stomach, and it didn’t help the year old feelings she’d been trying so hard to ignore.

Everything was complicated. Everything was difficult. She’d been married for years. How could she just give that up? She loved Will. Even if it wasn’t romantically, she still cared for him and loved him as a friend. She didn’t know how she could break his heart. Or her son’s.

Oh, Henry.

It was too much. She loved her son; she couldn’t turn his world upside down. It wasn’t fair.

“I’m not mad at you, Spencer.” JJ sat back in her seat on the jet, knowing her friend wouldn’t leave until she told him what was on her mind. The agent sighed, closing her eyes as she chose her next words very carefully. “I’m…” She looked around, searching for the right word to describe what exactly she was feeling. Upset? Angry? Confused? No word seemed to fit her emotions quite right; everything felt too small. No singular word could sum up her feelings, much less the ones she’d been hiding for six years.

“I’m just tired, Spence. Exhausted, really. This case…” The profiler trailed off, once again being particular in her word choices. “It just got to me. I mean, they… they were kids, Spence.” Her voice wavered, and she felt six years worth of tears threatening to spill. “And their parents… they endorsed it.” She felt sick. Everything was becoming too much. “Their own kids… were in love,” she choked on the word, feeling her face start to dampen. “And they punished them for it. For being in love. For having feelings they couldn’t control, for being brave enough to share their truth, to–”

She stopped herself.

She’d never been brave enough.

“They were brave… and their parents took it and threw it right back in their faces.”

The words felt bitter on her tongue. She didn’t know those kids. She had no reason to feel such a connection to them.

But she knew better.

She knew why it affected her so much.

JJ closed her eyes and felt her head drop as more tears fell, her body overcome with the stress and frustrations of hiding– hiding for much, much longer than six years. “They were brave,” she whispered.

Spencer watched as his friend cried, not completely understanding why she was taking this case so personally. She seemed so… fragile. Broken.

He knew there was something more. JJ was a trained profiler; there was no way she would react to a case like this unless there was something else seriously eating at her. Something deeper. Jennifer Jareau was the strong one, the one who took no bullshit and knew how to get what she wanted. She might not be as good at compartmentalizing as Emily, but she was a hell of a lot better than most agents. Stronger.

Spencer wasn’t used to seeing JJ like this. It scared him.

“JJ…”

“Please don’t, Spencer.” JJ kept her eyes shut, her lips twisting into a painful smile. “I know you want to help, and I- I appreciate it, I really do.” Another sigh. “I just… need to be alone right now.”

JJ’s voice continued to go in and out as she spoke, and Spencer couldn’t bear to watch it anymore. Deciding to give his friend some space, he got up and moved to sit with Alex, who immediately took interest in the state of the younger team member.

————

“Are you sure she would want this, Spencer? I mean, I know you want to help, but this seems a bit extreme.”

Spencer looked over at Alex as he brought his phone out of his pocket, his fingers gliding across the screen.

“It’s already done, Alex. Sorry.” He gave a mischievous smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, nerves still having a hold on him.

“How far away are we from Quantico?” The older woman asked.

“About three hours,” came the reply.

“And how far is she?”

Spencer’s eyes glinted as he smiled. “Two.”

Alex narrowed her eyes at the doctor, silently urging him to go on. “Come on, did you really not notice how checked out JJ was this whole time? Frankly, I’m surprised no one called Emily before I did.”

Alex nodded, following his story. “Uh-huh, and when did you call her?”

Spencer’s grin faltered, a guilty expression escaping him. “Last night.”

Alex sighed as she looked at him. “Spencer…”

“I know, I know. Emily has a life in London and we should respect that– I get it. But JJ… she was worrying me, Alex. And Emily… I don’t know. She always just seems to know how to make things better.”

“As long as you’re sure it’ll help,” Alex surrendered.

“I am.”

————

JJ’s head throbbed as she walked back into Quantico, trailing a bit behind the other team members. She needed a nap.

A collective sigh of relief came when the team was dismissed, everyone eager to get back to the beds in the comfort of their own homes.

“Uh, JJ?”

JJ turned her head to Spencer, making eye contact with the taller man. “Hm?”

“Hotch asked me to tell you he wants to see you in his office.”

JJ’s eyes narrowed as she considered the multitude of possible meanings behind that sentence. “Why?”

“Um, don’t take it personally,” Spencer started, fiddling with the zipper of his jacket. “But we all kinda noticed how… zoned out you were. I think he's just worried.”

JJ stood silent, staring at him. She needed to play her cards carefully, not give anything away. “Okay,” she said with a nod. “Thanks.” She added a smile, hoping it came across as genuine.

Spencer nodded, smiling before turning around to leave.

————

JJ let out a long sigh as she walked up the steps to Hotch’s office, already curating a story to explain her odd behavior. She knew they’d noticed her off demeanor, but she didn’t know to what extent, which was what scared her. She could lie, easily, but not if they know more than she does.

Taking one last deep breath, JJ reached her arm out and pushed the door open, stepping into her unit chief’s office.

“JJ.”

————

JJ’s heart dropped and her mouth went dry. It was as if her mind went completely blank and she’d forgotten everything she’d ever learned.

“Emily?”

JJ looked at the woman in front of her, still taller than her, and still just as beautiful as the last time she’d seen her.

Emily gave her a soft smile. “Hey.”

JJ just stared at her as she stood, not quite processing the fact that Emily was actually there. In person. They stood in silence for a few moments, Emily observing her younger friend as she collected her thoughts.

“You’re here,” JJ said, more relieved than she meant to sound.

“Of course I’m here, JJ.” Emily looked over to her side for one second as she walked over to Hotch’s desk, perching herself on the top of it. “Spencer told me about the case.” JJ looked up to meet her eyes. “And you.”

JJ’s breath hitched in the back of her throat. Suddenly, reality came crashing down on JJ like a large bucket of ice water. Emily was really here, right in front of her. In Quantico. Not London.

She took a gasp for air as her eyes once again teared up at the sight of her old team member, the woman she’d secretly loved for the past six years.

“Emily.”

JJ’s voice cracked as she launched herself at the older woman, wrapping her arms around her neck and burying her face in her shoulder. Her body shook as sobs wracked through her, heavy and filled with anguish. She cried as Emily comforted her, slowly rubbing her back to soothe the younger woman.

When JJ pulled away, her eyes were red and puffy, her face stained with tears and smeared mascara. “It–” she hiccuped. “Was horrible.” Her voice shook as she opened up, taking various pauses here and there to control her breathing.

“They were… drugging them and raping them and–” her voice caught in her throat, unable to speak clearly about the horrors she witnessed at the camp.

“Okay, JJ, I need you to breathe,” Emily said, her gaze fixated on the younger woman. “Alright?” She took a deep breath in, demonstrating for her. “Yeah?” JJ nodded. The younger woman followed her movements, taking in a few deep breaths before continuing.

“They had them hooked up to these IVs in this giant room, and they… they had these huge screens and for hours they just had them there, watching…” She couldn’t bring herself to voice the acts she’d witnessed. She shook her head as she recalled the encounter, suddenly feeling extremely nauseous. Her vision clouded as the images bombarded her, overwhelming her senses.

Emily hopped off the desk to stand in front of the younger woman, noticing the sudden change in her demeanor. “Hey, JJ, are you okay?” She brought her hands to JJ’s shoulders, steadying her as she swayed. “JJ, you need to sit down–”

“No.”

Emily was taken aback at JJ’s harsh tone. She rarely heard this tone from JJ; it was almost always reserved for the unsubs who pushed too many of her buttons. JJ had never used this tone with her before, and now Emily was confused.

“I need…” JJ took a deep breath, stepping back to look at the woman in front of her. “I need to tell you something.”

Emily nodded, trying to follow her friend’s words.“Anything, JJ.” She looked at her with so much sincerity that JJ could almost cry. She didn’t deserve her.

JJ took a deep breath as she thought about how to phrase it. She needed to confess; she knew she couldn’t hold it in any longer. Six years was hard enough, but now with this case? JJ knew it was only a matter of time before it all came crashing down. She always knew.

“I never wanted Will,” she blurted out.

Emily immediately cocked her head to the side, confused and concerned as to what brought out that confession. Of all things she expected JJ to say, this definitely wasn’t one of them.

“What?”

“I never wanted him,” JJ said, staying solid in her words. “At first, I blew him off every chance I got. I only agreed to go on dates with him because I was bored, Emily. And I was tired. Everything was so complicated, and Will…” JJ hesitated, not wanting to sound rude. “…wasn’t.” She shrugged. “He was easy; everything was easy. We never fought, and at first I thought that was a good thing, but then I realized it was just because I didn’t care enough to fight with him.”

“JJ, I don’t underst–”

“I never wanted him, Emily.” JJ interrupted her, her voice once again low and sharp. “I went on a few dates with him, sure, but that was only to please him. I was bored, and I thought he’d eventually leave me alone. I didn’t want him. I never wanted him, Emily.”

JJ looked up at her, meeting her gaze before quickly looking away. She took a shaky breath before speaking, her voice cracking with the weight of her words.

“I wanted you.”

Emily felt like she’d just gotten the wind knocked out of her. “What?” She whispered.

“Emily, I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you.” JJ’s voice cracked again, and Emily’s heart broke at the desperation in her voice. “I tried to make it known, to show you. But I… I wasn’t brave enough to tell you, so I just settled on giving you subtle signs.” She sniffled a bit before continuing. “But then you encouraged me to go for Will, and…”

JJ’s expression changed. She was hurt before, but this… this was different. She looked devastated. “And I was so confused. Because I… I’d gotten it into my head that maybe you liked me too. I misread the signals you sent me, foolishly hoping you felt the same, but then you... You told me to go after him.” JJ stared at Emily, her eyes full of hurt and anguish.

“Why did you tell me to go after him? I didn’t want him. I never wanted him. He was my friend, I liked him, but I didn’t love him, not like that, I–” she took a deep breath, attempting to calm herself down. “I’m sorry.” Another breath. “I’m sorry. It’s not your fault. I chose to go after him; you saw us getting along and you encouraged me as a friend, I know, but…” She closed her eyes before she spoke again, feeling like she was back in the same spot she was where they had the conversation. “But it fucking hurt.” JJ’s voice was low, laced with emotion. “It hurt way more than any other breakup did, and that… broke me,” JJ whispered. “Because I loved you. And I still love you.”

Emily held her gaze, trying to wordlessly communicate her feelings. She knew she couldn’t interrupt the woman, not when she’s so emotionally charged, but she wished there was something she could do to soothe the woman’s feelings.

“But I wasn’t brave enough to tell you. God, can you believe that?” She looked up at the ceiling, chuckling bitterly. “Those kids were brave enough to live their truth, and they were teenagers. What does that say about me? I mean, how pathetic could I be, really…” She trailed off, no longer having a specific goal in mind.

JJ took a deep breath before continuing, knowing she had to finish her testimony at some point. “Those kids were brave enough to be themselves and they almost died, Emily. And when I was in there… All I could think about was you. And me. Because I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember, and I’m tired of pretending I’m not. It’s exhausting, Emily. I’m so… I’m so tired. I’m tired of living a life that’s not real. I love you, and I physically cannot keep hiding it any longer and I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same way because I probably just ruined whatever friendship we ever had but I just couldn’t go any longer without admitting that I am absolutely crazy about you and I-”

“I’ve dreamed about being with you for years.”

Emily barely got the words out before reaching forward and taking JJ’s head in her hands, connecting their lips with more urgency than she’d ever felt before. Her stomach did twists and turns as they kissed, and she felt her face heat up as JJ smiled.

JJ’s heart was soaring. She felt like it was about to beat out of her chest, and she was terrified that Emily could feel it leaping and bounding all over the place. Her brain wasn’t doing her any favors, either, and all she could process was the fluttery feeling in her stomach and the soft lips on her own.

JJ grinned as she leaned farther into the kiss, gripping onto the sides of Emily’s jacket and bringing her closer. She felt her stomach flip when Emily’s tongue danced across her bottom lip, and she instantly opened her mouth, welcoming anything and everything the older woman was willing to give her.

JJ gasped and stepped back when she felt a moan slip, embarrassed at her lack of composure. Her eyes snapped up to meet Emily’s, whose pupils had expanded nearly tenfold. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, worrying that she’d ruined their moment.

Emily just smiled before leaning in for another kiss. “Don’t apologize.”

JJ smiled in relief, sighing into the kiss as Emily caressed her back. “I love you so much,” she said. “I can’t believe I hid it for six years,” she said quietly, guilt creeping up inside her.

“JJ,” Emily started, gaze softening at the woman in front of her. “Listen to me.” JJ stared at her, swallowing lightly. “You weren’t ready. There’s no shame in that.”

JJ felt as if thirty pounds were lifted off her shoulders. “Oh my God, you don’t know how happy I am to hear you say that,” she breathed out.

“Everyone… accepts themselves at different times, JJ. I’m proud of you, no matter how long it took.”

JJ looked at her, her eyes glossing over once more. “I just feel like we missed out on so much…”

Emily shook her head as she stared at the woman in front of her, tenderly taking her hand in her own. “We have the whole future, JJ. We have so much time…”

“What about Will?” JJ asked, her voice quivering.

Emily’s smile faltered. “To be honest, JJ…” She looked at JJ’s expression, trying to decipher the meaning. “I only encouraged you to go for him because I thought you wouldn’t feel the same way about me… the way I felt about you.”

JJ felt her blood freeze. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Emily’s eyes widened. “What?” She questioned.

JJ stood up straighter and took a step closer to Emily. “You were in love with me this whole time?”

Emily just blinked, as if it were the most obvious fact in the world. “Well, yeah…”

Nothing, save for a quiet “what the hell,” was muttered from JJ as she took Emily’s face in her hands and crashed their lips together, initiating a much faster, and much deeper kiss than before.

Emily felt a familiar sensation build up in her stomach as she reciprocated the kiss, moaning as six years of feelings bubbled up and over into one moment.

The kiss only got more heated over time, and Emily was beginning to get nervous that they were approaching a point of no return. As it progressed, Emily let out a short gasp at JJ, staring at her in shock after the blonde bit down on her bottom lip, a moan escaping the taller woman’s mouth.

“That’s for telling me to go after Will.”

Emily scoffed and laughed slightly as JJ came closer, taking her lips once again and reaching her arm around to slightly pull on the older agent’s ponytail, smirking to herself as Emily let out another short moan.

“And that’s for taking six years to confess.”

[stxrvel]

birthday love present

pairing: steve rogers x f!reader

words: +4k

warnings: some bad words, age gap (steve's his canon age), reader has a lip piercing.

note: hi guys! this is my first time writing on the steve side. ive been trying to write this one for a long time and the inspiration finally came in today and i think im proud of this one so i hope you guys like it too! this oneshot is from a request i had some time ago that said:

Imagine being Tony Starks daughter and having a massive 21st birthday party at the tower. Despite her younger age either bucky or Steve is in love with her and they end up kissing at the party. Tony sees this and absolutely FREAKS!! Calling Steve/bucky (...) some shit cause he’s technically like 100 and it’s her 21st birthday. Mama pepper wouldn’t be super upset and calms him down and it ends in fluff of course lol

you can read some other works at my masterlist! also, if anyone has a request feel free to send it to me as a message or an ask!

The Tower had been filled with color that night. The pastel pink reigned in the decoration that your parents had put together and you couldn't have been more delighted, it was everything you had dreamed of. The music was perfect, you sang and moved to the rhythm of your favorite songs; all the people around you enjoyed as much as you did that huge birthday party. The food was sensational, there was a whole table full of all your favorite dishes that seemed endless.

Of course the best of all was the bar. Natasha tended it with finesse and mischief, she was the best of the bunch making cocktails. And she only winked at you every time you came back to the bar for another shot as if you hadn't just walked by two minutes earlier.

You had lost sight of your parents a while ago, but you were having an amazing time with your friends singing at the top of your lungs and dancing until your heels burned. You didn't want to take any breaks, you wanted to enjoy every moment of that party to the limit.

Every once in a while you would run into some of your father's friends and say hello. The whole Avengers group had attended that party, although you had asked your mother not to invite them because it would be weird, even though you saw them as a family. She obviously didn't care and so at that moment you were stuck in a bay surrounded by testosterone, with a Norse god telling a weird story to the whole assembled group. There was a pile of bottles and cans on the floor that you couldn't help but grimace at.

“Everything okay?” You heard next to you.

Steve Rogers was to your left, leaning a little closer to you so you could hear him over the loud music. His short blond hair was messy enough that you could tell he was having a good time too, and his light eyes were exalted, as if he had just come running up to where you were. But you didn't know if you could answer him with him so close.

Your history with Steve was… kind of complicated.

Tony Stark was your father, so consequently you used to spend quite a bit of time at the Tower and you knew all the team members as if they were your own family, even though you'd only met them a little over a year ago.

Steve was captivating from the first moment. Maybe it was that lopsided smile that took over his face every time you greeted him or said goodbye, or the way he would throw his head back when he laughed at something you said, even if you didn't think you were very funny, or the way he was always so considerate and cautious when he addressed you.

You didn't know exactly how it happened, or maybe you did, but there came a time when you simply wanted to go to the Tower just to see him. Tony would gladly take you along, completely unaware of your reasons, hoping to spend quality time with you and show you the latest inventions he had designed. But you were always waiting for the moment when he would show up.

And that was perhaps a serious problem. Because he was your father's best friend, or something like that, or because he was exaggeratedly older than you even though he spent 80% of his life inside that plane on the ice and basically time stood still for him. But for whatever the reason, you never told anyone, not any of your friends or your mother who was your confidant, there was even a time when you fought those feelings because you knew no one around you would understand, not even your parents. And you didn't think you could bear their disappointed looks.

Carrying that secret inside your chest used to not be difficult, you considered that you were very good at hiding those feelings and those longing looks. However, you had never put that statement to the test while drunk.

“I'm fine,” you slurred the words and frowned at how terrible that had sounded. You cleared your throat to speak again, but Steve was quicker.

“It seemed to me like you weren't enjoying Thor's amazing stories.”

“Ah,” you laughed slyly, moving your hair off your shoulders and turned to look again at the group of people gathered at the front listening to the other blond's words. “No, it's very entertaining. Not at all like the stories he has told before.”

Steve sketched a smile and through all the noise you could barely hear his laughter. It was only at that moment that it bothered you terribly that the music was so loud.

But his blue eyes rested on yours again and the words and thoughts evaporated in your head. A rational thought ran through your head telling you that maybe you couldn't disguise the lamb's eyes much with alcohol in your veins, but you very responsibly decided not to pay attention.

“You look good,” the blond shook his head looking at you down to your toes and you felt your ears heat up. “Finally 21.”

You didn't lose sight of the way Steve's eyes moved to read the band across your body, the one that Pepper, your mother, had put on you before you arrived at the huge party on this floor of the Tower. You felt a shiver run down your back and you straightened up unconsciously.

“My mother gave it to me,” you commented, trying to shake off the tension you felt in your shoulders from the intense look he was giving you. Or maybe you were just feeling it like that.

“I figured as much. Tony just took care of the money then.”

“Actually,” you moved a little closer to Steve to talk about the music, as he leaned next to you too and you felt shivers run through your body, “my mother told me he chose the color of the decor and the food.”

Too close to be true, you saw him nod at your words and his hair almost brush your cheek as he pulled away so he could see you. You felt your stomach do a flip and for a moment you thought you were going to throw up. Anxious, you fiddled with the piercing you had in your lower lip.

“Do you want to go somewhere else?”

You shook your head embarrassingly fast in a nod.

Steve moved to walk towards one of the two exits the bay had, which led directly to the bar Natasha was still tending. You followed closely behind him, with a bubbling feeling in the pit of your stomach.

He had dressed in a basic white shirt and a royal blue jacket that brought out his eyes beautifully. You remembered well that you had once told him that that blue looked great on him, and that in general dark colors really brought out his eyes. You didn't want to think that's why he had chosen that jacket, but…

Steve leaned over the bar where Natasha had already approached to greet you two and smiled before speaking.

“A shot of strong coffee for the lady here,” the man gestured to you.

You stood there for a few seconds staring at his perfect smile before realizing what he had said. Natasha barely nodded before heading over to the coffee machine Tony had set up in the corner of the bar.

You frowned at Steve, your hand moving to bump against his arm in a playful action.

“I'm not drunk!”

“You're very red,” he replied, after letting out a laugh that you could hear more clearly as you were further away from the speakers. His head moved to where Natasha was standing and you took a moment to see his arm resting on the bar, where the sleeve of the jacket was tucked up and clinging like a second skin. “I don't think it's a good idea for you to arrive dizzy like this for the pie game.”

“I'm just fine, Steve,” you slurred the words again and mentally cursed your lousy alcohol tolerance. You hadn't even had that much to drink, the party had only started about two hours ago. What did he want? For you to sit around drinking orange juice until you split the cake? No, how boring. “I'm lucid enough to break pieces of cake for everyone at this party.”

Natasha arrived with a ceramic mug and set it down in front of you on the bar. You would have preferred to leave it there, but maybe it wouldn't do you too much harm to take it?

“It's better not to take any chances anyway,” the redhead leaned her arms on the bar and gave you a smile.

“Argh,” you frowned at both of them and grabbed the mug to take a long sip. “Neither of you trust me.”

“Well, I can only say that one of us would blindly trust you with our lives, and I already have a person for that,” Natasha commented very nonchalantly as you continued sipping your coffee, and you barely noticed the look she shared with Steve before she walked off to the other end of the bar.

“What was she talking about?” you asked Steve once you let go of the cup.

The blond shrugged in man. “She sometimes just says cryptic things and goes off like that. I'm used to it.”

You nodded agreeing with his words. You were already feeling the effect of the coffee and were starting to see a little clearer. Well, maybe you were a little drunk. And maybe you needed a little more coffee.

-

Steve very kindly made you another coffee and you sat down right in front of him to watch the whole process as if you had never seen anyone make coffee in your life.

When you finished it, you let out a sound of approval drawing a smile from him.

“This was much better than Natasha's.”

“No one makes coffee better than she does.”

“You do! You should make coffee more often. In fact, you could start a coffee shop.”

Steve smiled broadly and you rejoiced at the butterflies in your stomach.

“I think I'm going to stick to being an Avenger for now. But maybe I can make you coffee every time you come over.”

Your eyes sparkled at the prospect. “I'd come by every day, Steve.”

“I'm counting on that.”

“Maybe you'd get tired of seeing me so often,” you twisted your lips into an expression of mock regret, lowering your gaze and wiggling your index finger over the rim of the empty cup. The black remains of the coffee made an odd figure that painted the white ceramic background.

“I don't think that's possible,” Steve muttered, and if it hadn't been for him coming over the bar and the music not being so loud you wouldn't have heard him. “I like having you around.”

“Really?” you raised your head, your facade fading.

“Sure. You're like the life of the party. Everything's better when you're around.”

Hearts flew around you as you saw the smile he was giving you. Just for you. You felt like fireworks were about to explode all around you and the anticipation of having him closer gnawed at your insides. Your fingers tingled and your heart was pounding.

You just had to get a little closer and…

“… and where's the birthday girl?”

You broke off suddenly.

Now you felt like your heart would pound out of your chest, but from fear.

You turned around as Steve rounded the bar to leave, and found your father walking toward you with his arms outstretched. Beside him, your mother was smiling tenderly at you.

“Come, honey, it's time to sing happy birthday.”

You stood in front of the cake, a bunch of smiling faces in front of you. The lights began to change color and dimmed. The atmosphere was a little more closed in, but it was perfect. You watched as the people in front of you sang happily, celebrating another year of your life, a whole year of experiences and changes that you had accepted with patience and love. There was nothing more at that moment that you could ask for to make it perfect. You had all the people you loved around you and delicious food, what more did you need?

The song ended and you blew out the candles. Your wish was a secret even to you.

The cake was passed around and you even had repeat servings. It was delicious.

But the party didn't stop there. After the cake the music continued and the drinks kept coming. You decided not to drink any more for the moment, at least while the food went down a bit because you had also stolen a few bites from the table full of your favorite dishes when you thought everyone was distracted.

Your parents hugged you at least five times since then and had reminded you how proud they were of you, all you had accomplished and the woman you had become. You couldn't have been happier.

Sometime during the night you slipped off to the bathroom. You arranged your hair that was quite messy from all the dancing before you left.

At the end of the hallway, reaching the stairs to go down to the party, you found Steve and Clint watching from above. They both greeted you as soon as you arrived. You noticed how, poorly disguised, Clint pushed Steve closer to you.

The blond cleared his throat as he walked over to where you were.

“How've you been doing so far?”

“It's been amazing! It's the best birthday party I've ever had,” you commented to him with a huge smile.

You heard Clint cackle sonorously and Steve in front of you rolled his eyes. But he smiled at you when their eyes met.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?”

You stood static for a moment, before replying, “Yeah, sure.”

Steve calmly led you back down the hallway you had traveled from the bathroom and they stopped at a safe distance.

You stood there for a few seconds, in somewhat awkward silence. Steve seemed to be thinking deeply about whatever it was he wanted to tell you, and his hesitation did nothing to help calm the anxiety that was beginning to course through you from the tips of your hands to the way your stomach sank.

Already your palms had begun to sweat when Steve finally spoke.

“I wanted to talk to you about something that… I don't know how you're going to take.”

You passed saliva despite the lump you felt in your throat. you didn't know what to expect from his attitude, because he looked too nervous and almost worried, you could say scared. you didn't want to expect the worst, so you waited for him to continue.

“What happens is that I… I wanted to tell you that… I don't expect you to take it the wrong way or reciprocate, I mean, you can say no…”

Steve was silent once again, avoiding your gaze. Your head was racing a mile a minute and it filled you with nerves to think that maybe he was going to say what you wanted him to say, what you wanted to hear and what you wanted to tell him too. But how… perfect would that be? You had imagined it so many times, but what was the likelihood that it would actually happen?

“I love it when you laugh,” Steve spoke, pulling you out of your head. His determined eyes looked anywhere. You felt a warmth blossom in your chest and you were sure your eyes must have looked like two crystal balls because of how bright they must have been. “And when you have that giant smile on your face that could light up an entire city. And I love when you tell me what you do in the day so animatedly that you don't even realize you're moving your hands too much. I also love when you dance like you're the only person on the dance floor because you sparkle. And I love how your eyes look in sunlight or moonlight, how they shine so bright I feel like I could orbit around them…. I just- I…”

“I like you too, Steve,” you interrupted him, noticing his frown.

His head moved quickly to stop looking anywhere but at you, and you could finally meet his beautiful blue eyes. His chest was heaving, almost as much as yours as you realized what had just happened. For a moment you thought that, if that was all you could do, just look at each other, you might stay right where you were for a long time. His warm, welcoming eyes roamed over your face and more than nerves and anxiety you felt very excited, so much so that you could run through a field of flowers. A smile was making its way on your face and he promptly followed you.

When it seemed that his nervousness had left him, you felt his hand brush yours. You took it without a second's hesitation.

“You do?” he asked, his voice cautious but full of excitement.

“Yes!” you replied, your smile widening. You squeezed his hand and pulled it closer to your body.

Before you gave him time to process what was happening, you crashed your lips against his.

The fireworks exploded.

You felt him tense as you rested your hands on his shoulders, but it was a matter of seconds before he let go.

His lips assaulted your mouth, delicate but passionate. It was everything you wanted and so much more. A love so fierce it could sweep away everything in its path. Your lips welcomed his, hoping this would not be the last time, and his hands clung to your hips with a promise to never let go. It was soft, desperate, tender, wild, all at the same time. Steve seemed to want to take his time savoring that moment, but at the same time he wanted to take it all at once and leave you breathless.

His body moved until you bumped against the wall and his hands squeezed your skin. The sensation was new, welcome and maddening. Now that you had tasted him you didn't think you could ever stop. His sweet scent flooded all over you with your hands tangled in the strands of his hair. His hand on the back of your neck pressed you against his lips and you felt infinitely close, but you still wanted more.

You felt like you were going to explode into a thousand pieces when you…

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO DOING?”

Steve turned away from you before Tony finished speaking.

You turned to see your parents in the hallway and Clint off to the side of them, an apologetic grimace on his face.

“Dad-”

“Get away from her. NOW.”

“Tony,” your mother put her hand on Tony's shoulder, who was looking at Steve as if he wanted to fly him out of the Tower.

Your heart was pounding wildly, a sour feeling making its way into your chest.

“I'm sorry, Steve. I turned the volume down and got distracted for a moment and they just appeared out of nowhere,” Clint tried to approach, but Tony's deadly stare drew him back a few steps.

“DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS? AND YOU LET THEM?”

In the midst of all that flurry, you turned to look at Steve. His face was nothing compared to the happiness he had radiated a few minutes ago and it contracted your heart. You moved closer to him, alerting him a little as he continued to watch Tony's argument with Clint and Pepper trying to calm them both down.

You took his hand without taking your gaze from his and when he turned to look at you you didn't like the fear you saw in his eyes.

“LET HER GO!”

“Tony, that's enough,” Pepper grabbed his arm preventing him from getting too close to the two of you.

“Are you out of your mind? You're like a hundred years older than her!”

“Dad, stop, you don't know-”

“She's my daughter, Steve!”

“I know, Tony, and I'm sorry, but-” he paused, his hand squeezing yours in support. “I can't apologize for that. I love her. I swear there's nothing stronger than that, and there's nothing I wouldn't do for her either. I know it's hard for you, but I've been holding this in for so long and it's because of you, because I knew you'd react like this and I can't go on like this.”

Your father held his gaze on Steve, his eyes a blaze of burning anger and for a moment you feared he wouldn't relent. But Tony moved letting out a snort and walked over to where Pepper stood. She put her arms around him and murmured some things to him that you couldn't hear.

You turned to see Steve, who already had his gaze on yours. It was electrifying. You didn't think that he would ever really look at you in that loving and caring way as he was doing at that moment. You felt at peace for the first time, without having to pretend around him or around anyone else. You could finally show all that you had inside instead of holding it in.

He gave you a small smile, but enough to give you the strength to argue with your father if necessary.

Tony sighed audibly and you both turned to look at him. Your father passed his gaze over both of you, as if hoping to find some response. You squeezed Steve's hand in preparation for anything.

“Just…” Tony clicked his tongue. “Do you think you'll be okay with him?”

The question surprised you, and even more so his warm look, but you nodded quickly.

“Yes.”

Your father shook his head, thinking to himself, before looking back at Steve.

“This… is going to take a good while, Rogers,” he pointed at him with his index finger, accusingly. “You better not screw this up.”

Your mother smiled at you, still wrapping her arms around Tony, her fingers massaging his tense muscles. You heard Steve's positive response and your father looked at you again.

“Fine,” he nodded. “Fine, whatever. Don't ever do that around me again,” he dismissed them by waving his hand and started to walk away down the hallway. “I can't believe it, Pepper, since when?”

“Actually, love, I'm surprised you barely noticed.”

“What do you mean?”

Steve walked over to Clint and put an arm around his shoulders. The latter grimaced shaking his head.

“That's the last time I'm counting on you, Barton,” Steve patted his shoulder amicably before walking away again.

His gaze met yours and he extended his hand toward you.

“I already apologized, Rogers, what else do you want?”

You took Steve's hand and pulled him in the direction of the stairs with a huge smile, not waiting for him to respond to Clint, and squeezed his hand when you could see the party still going on downstairs.

“So we're really doing this,” you heard him murmur, and you turned to give him a resounding kiss on the cheek. His lips curved.

“We're really doing this.”

You didn't know what the future held, but you were more than willing to face it head on. You walked down the stairs moving your clasped hands back and forth, feeling the happiest you could have been in a long time, more complete and loved than ever, and you knew the smile on Steve's face said the same as yours.

You hoped that wasn't the last time you would hold his hand that tight.

[stormblessed95]

I'm Stepping Away For A While...

Over the past week, and then some, I have been called a multitude of names in an effort to make fun of me and rude names including wh*re, p**sy, bitch, a liar, a fake, etc. I've been told I'm a fake/bad ARMY, a fake jikooker, etc. Ive had people call my friends deragatory names and misgender them. And I've also had someone in my DMs try to gaslight me into believing that this was not harassment or Bullying, but that I should apologize to my followers for threatening to block people and that people were just expressing strongly worded commentary over how my actions hurt them. And that I needed to take responsibility for creating the drama at all. And none of that is okay, and honestly it's been a lot. And the way people just brushed over the name calling and harassment regardless of if they disagreed with me or liked me, that was a lot too.

Blocking people to curate my space is not harassment or bullying or disrespectful. Its simply protecting myself and trying to curate a safe space for me personally. Nor have I ever started a hate campaign to try and drive another blogger off the platform. And if a post of mine encouraged people to send messages or hurtful asks to someone else, and I KNEW about it, I would've said something and asked them to stop. Sharing an opinion or disagreeing with someone is not me sending anyone hate. Nor would I ever want that for anyone regardless of any disagreements we had over whatever topic.

I've lost quite a few followers over the past week, people believing things that are being said and that's fine, i was never here for the numbers anyway. Id rather you unfollow or block me peacefully if you dont like me or my posts. Some of the people engaging with this hate against me were honestly surprising. But it is what it is. But I don't feel safe in this space anymore. I honestly haven't for a while. Blogging isn't as fun anymore. I don't want to post while it feels like a chore. And that's not because of anyone or anything in particular. I opened this blog because it brought me joy and it was fun. And it's really sad that something that brought me happiness is no longer doing that for me. It's not just all this drama either. It's probably been awhile coming, making my timeline posts for longer posts felt more like something I had to do for you all instead of something I wanted to do for me. And that's not what I want for this space.

So I'll be stepping away for awhile. When or if I come back will depend on if I can get that joy back for doing this and I feel like this can be a fun corner of the internet for all of us together again. And also for if I feel like I can do this without it being so mentally draining and just not good for my mental health like it has been lately.

I'll leave my blog here and my masterlist because I know that a lot of people enjoy the archive of some past content I have cataloged there. I don't want to take that away from anyone for that reason alone since I want people to be able to access that content if they can't otherwise find it. I also want the option to be able to come back to this blog again at some point. So I don't want to delete it or say I'm stepping away permanently, nor do I want people wondering what happened to me or anything. I just need a break. I do apologize for all the post series I have started that are remaining unfinished now for a little while.

If you want to unfollow me knowing that I'll be absent from here for awhile or for any other reason, that's totally fine. Honest. No hard feelings. I wish you well and hope everyone will continue to do well and enjoy the next few months of music, content and love from the members. Maybe I'll try to be back in time for JJK1 whenever that happens.

Again, this is just something I need. I'm okay, I'm not hurt or upset. I just need a break. I appreciate you all understanding. I'll still be in this fandom and be ARMY for life. I'll still be around for the next day or so. Thank you for understanding. I do love you guys and hope to back as soon as I'm able to.

[partsofapuppy]

(his post is made by an endo neutral, anti leaning, cdds first alter who is critical of both pro endos and anti endos.)

i do have a problem with the... hypocrisy of syscourse.

the amount of things anti endos do that would get death threats sent to pro endos if they did the same is WILD.. and i think some of you need to take a step back. what happened to treat others the way they want to be treated?

1. hiding responses debunking information

yeah i think everyone knows who im talking about. you make a post with faulty sources and when someone makes a post debunking your sources and information, you hide it. that's blatant disinformation at this point.

it's Okay to be wrong by the way. you don't have to be right.

2. wishing death upon endogenic systems

ive seen NOBODY talk about it but there's an art piece going around depicting someone holding a sword, with the text "death upon endos" (paraphrased.) and for this one i KNOW people would react badly because i remember the kill the anti endo inside of you merch. that was HEINOUS. but this is fine? i dont know how to break it to you guys but wishing death upon people is not. the leftist take you think it is. id say its actually pretty ableist. i wouldnt call it fascistic because that's a bit extreme (for both pieces of artworks) but Dear God

3. infantilization (for lack of better terms) of pro/endos

assuming endogenic systems or even pro endogenic (cdd) systems are being groomed or are just misinformed or what not. these are people. ive said it before and i'll say it again but people have the right to have different opinions. than you. it doesn't mean they've been groomed, it doesn't mean they're idiots, they are autonomous human beings who have decided, "hey, i think pro endos exist."

4. accusations of grooming

im really upset about this one. as a survivor of grooming i really think you guys need to learn what grooming means. grooming is inherently sexual.

"One tool common to those who sexually abuse kids is grooming: manipulative behaviors that the abuser uses to gain access to a potential victim, coerce them to agree to the abuse, and reduce the risk of being caught." from RAINN. stop flippantly using such words. as a grooming victim it genuinely grinds my gears that you are watering this term down. imagine if someone said anti endos were grooming people into thinking endos weren't real.

5. invasion of tags

this one i also know you'd be upset about because ive seen endos invade tags and they (rightfully so) get called out. i dont quite like how it's okay to do this for anti endos.

6. claiming singlets can't be in syscourse

this one especially makes me mad. i know if a singlet said "endos aren't real" a lot of anti endos would be leaping for joy. but when a singlet says "endos are real" it's all "singlets need to stay out of syscourse." i hate to break it to you. i really do. but singlets are autonomous people who, regardless of whether you like it or not, have the right to an opinion. especially because fused systems may count themselves as singlets.

please think before you do something. please put yourself into other people's shoes.

[divinesolas]

Hi! Can I request an Osferth smut where she sees the two ladies fighting over him and gets jealous and runs away and Osferth has to run after her to fix it?

a/n: i love love love this idea so much!! I hope you like it!! Not my best work, Sorry for the delay!

Warnings: Not proofread, mutual pining, public sex ? I mean they are in the woods but no ones around, nsfw.

You’ve been traveling with uhtred and his gang for a couple of years now being one of his closest allies along with finan, sihtric and osferth. Right now you were out exploring the woods alone looking for herbs. Osferth had gotten a nasty cut on his leg and you wanted to do nothing more but to help him. It was a secret to no one you were in love with osferth, well maybe other than him. 

“Just tell him how you feel.” You remember sihtric asking you in an alehouse, finan and osferth went off to go find some woman while you were sitting in an alehouse moping with sithric. “I cant.” He groans and chugs his drink. “You can, you just won't.”  Finally you had found what you wanted and collected a good amount of it before walking back towards the town. As you enter you hear a large amount of commotion and rush over. 

It's two girls who are fighting. They look oddly familiar. They seem to be yelling out something you can't really hear. You watch in amazement as Finan and Uhtred break up the fight. “What's happening here?” You notice osferth standing awkwardly off to the side. They begin to both yell at finan saying something about osferth. Oh. You remember now, in the alehouse on two different occasions you remember one of the girls giggling and smiling at osferth who would walk over to them and you didn't see them again for a while. They were both clearly taken with him and were fighting over him. Your eyes water as you look at the two girls, you look like neither of them, he would never be attracted to you.

Osferth notices you and his eyes widen. You're suddenly humiliated and the basket you were carrying drops out of your hands as you book it. You can hear him calling after you but you dont care as you continue to run. You continue to run through the woods until you end up at the river and sit at the seat to catch your breath, praying he never finds you.

“y/n.” but of course he does. He’s standing behind you, out of breath. You turn back to him and cross your legs. He says your name again softer but with no response he sighs. You hope he leaves but instead he moves to take a seat next to you. “I'm sorry-” “For what?” you look at him, the tears already pooling back in your eyes. “I… I don't know…” You huff and turn away from him, burying your face in your lap. “I'm sorry for upsetting you.” “Do you think I'm pretty?” You don't look at him as you speak. You hear him take a light gasp as he considers his next words. “I think you're the most beautiful woman in the whole world.” Despite his beautiful words and how they make your chest hurt you whip your head up at him angrily. “Then why is it never me?” you hiss. He looks confused but you don't give him time to ask. “Why is it never I who gets invited back with you? Why do you never give me that kind of attention if you think I'm so pretty? Will you never love me the way I love you?” The tears are not running quickly down your face as you vigorously rub your hands along your cheeks to clear them. 

After a beat the hands that are on your face are pulled away and he grabs your cheeks to stare at you directly in the eyes. “I love you.” Your eyes widen, “No-” “i love you more than words can describe i love you more than flowers love the rain and nightingales love to sing. I need you the way the moon needs the sun, you are my soul, my life. You are my everything. I'm sorry ive made you feel this way, I never wanted this to happen. I didn't want to have you like any of those other girls because they do not matter to me like you matter to me.”

His eyes are also teary as he speaks, “I love you. I wish for you to be by my side, be my lady until the day I die.” You're breathless, you can barely believe your ears, you believe it to be a dream but the pounding of your heart in your ears reminds you it's real.

You lean towards him and he leans towards you, “I love you.” “I love you more.” You kiss. 

It starts off soft before turning passionate and quick as you slowly lean back and fall to the grassy floor under you, you admire osferth as he holds himself up above you. “Here?” Here.” “Are you sure you want to-” “yes.” “Maybe we should wait-” “I have done enough waiting, I want you now.” 

He kisses you again as he finally gives in to your advances, he rearranges his clothes and pulls his cock free and lifts up your dress so he has access to you. You moan loudly as he pushes himself in as he curses.

He gives you a second before he begins to move, all you can do is moan as he whispers sweet nothings in your ear. You feel yourself close, an you tighten around him causing him to moan, “Fuck are you close?” You nod feverishly, “please, fuck, please wait for me lets cum together.” You whine but listen and try you best not to. He gets close relatively quickly especially when all he can hear are your moans and whines begging him to come. 

“Cum please.” He begs you. So you do and so does he. You're both left panting as he falls on top of you, not pulling out,  causing you to giggle.

“I love you so much.” You say as you run a hand through his hair. “I love you more.”

[matthewmurdockswife]

Hello!! Could you please do one where Tony Stark is the readers dad and he finds her SH?? Thank you!

Iron brusies x tony stark (platonic)

Tw: self harm, depictive description of cutting, anxiety attack, hitting,

a/n : guys im always here to talk feel free to talk to me about anything at anytime good or bad my messages are and will always be open you can even send me a anonymous message in the req box if thats what you need to do Talk to me or a friend theres always someone there for you if you look hard enough I promise

I never felt like enough, which is unexpected when you’re constantly put out into the media and are being portrayed as “the happiest person alive” everyone wants my life many envy my family and my life style but not very many people understand it, and I mean truly understand it. Underneath the media personality I had to put on as an avengers daughter and a future avenger hid many scars.

It started a few years ago on accident I was shaving my legs when I accidentally sliced myself. But my reaction wasnt the same as it used to be, instead of being upset I was relieved. It felt like an escape and from that moment foward it felt impossible to stop

“ hey kiddo” My dad walked over to me while I leant against the kitchen island “hey” I remained looking at my phone my voice was faltering and was sure to give me away I didnt need my dad knowing about how I felt. If I ever wanted to be an avenger I cant have problems like this I cant let anyone see me weak.

He had stopped his movements, looking at me he reached out to touch my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me he always seemed to know something was up. without looking I pushed off the island without a glance or a word. I couldnt let him see me break. No one can see me break.

Everything felt out of control, my world was spiralling and so I went to the one thing that put me in control. My razor blades. I took the elevator up to the secluded floor I knew what I was doing in order for me to not get caught I had to think smart. I had this memorized, never say where your going, never go to that floor with another avenger and never use your own room.

I told friday the floor number remaining as composed as possible the cracks in my voice a dead giveaway “ mrs stark are you alright your blood pressure and heart rate have dramatically increased” taking a deep breath I reply to the ai “im fine fri” using an irritated tone in an attempt to conceal how im crumbling apart “ are you sure mrs stark? I can contact your father if needed” fridays tone questioning and concerned “im fine friday im just not feeling well” And I darted out of the elevator the moment the doors where opened

I opened the drawer containg the one thing I needed my razor as I smashed it against the floor over and over again until the metal blades broke free and I grabbed one and pushed it into my leg letting the metal drag across my skin. The blood dripping down my leg.

my hands shook and my body trembled one more I told myself each time. one more and ill be okay one more I kept repeating it over and over again in my head like a melody, a mantra like a prayer for help

my hands shook I felt my mind scream a blood curdling scream when I heard the thing I dreaded most. a knock on the door “hey kiddo you alright friday said you felt sick do you need anything can I come in”

i was panicking i thought i had this covered i thought i could be smooth about this i thiught i coukd do this and no one would know the thought of my father finding out about me about what i am what i do what ive become is enough to start sending me into a anxiety attack “ im about to have a shower” my voice was faulty and a dead give away and i covered my mouth trying to stop the broken sobs from escaping my lips anymore then they already had .” dont lie to me friday said your heart reate was through the rough whats going on kiddo” I let a sob escape my mouth but quickly covered it I heard a sigh and then a click

the door had been opened it was my greatest nightmare my breathing quicked as I lunged full force at the door trying to keep my dad out but he had had the advantage he was standing I was flipped onto my stomach as he pushed open the door once again

“ why are you on the floor kiddo c’mon stand up” he reached under my bicep as attempt to help lift me up “ NO” I screamed ripping my arm from his grasp looking up face stained in tears my dad’s expression written of pure shock guilt washed over me my emotions reaching an all time new high

I felt that drowning feeling begin again in my chest and then in my stomach and the voices in my brain began chanting on how I had messed this up, how it was all over, how I was worthless.Any negative comment anyones made on me being thrown at me by my own mind I scrambled to sit up against the tub holding my legs to my chest gasling hard for air. I was having an anxiety attack in front kd my dad who sat there eyes wide motiomless and wearing a shocked expression he came to sit down next tk me stroking my back while I sobbed wildy he pulled me into his chest while I fought against him throwing weak haphazard punches and his shoulder screaming kicking and crying to be let go off but he knly held me tighter and stroked my hair gently shishing me quieting my cries as he had done when i was younger to console me .

only then did I relax into his embrace

only then did I allow myself to be vulnerable

only then did he notice the multitudeof faded and fresh marks on my legs including the ones I had just freshly reopened

only then was I honest and opened up about the past two years of hell I went through

only then did I begin to see my dad differently as someone who understood what I had gone through because he had gone through it himself. I gained a new appreciation for my father that day, I’ve never been better and I owe it all to him

A/n

girlie im so sorry i didnt even see this lol sorry It took me so long to get around to. anywho sorry if this wasnt what you meant also sorry if this is bad its like 1 am my eyes are burning 🤭 love you guys never be scared to reach out for help, and always drink your water <3 bye loves

[bil-daddy]

hi mr bildad um im just gonna dump this here since i have no one else to talk to

as someone who has always praised in their ability to be friends with anyone (i also need human interaction to survive btw) ive been feeling very lonely, especially since now are the school holidays.

my best friend (who is one year older than me) is barely online and doesn't take me seriously enough. and when i ask my friend group (with 2 other people my age) if they want to go out nothing happens. ive asked so many times but it's like they just don't want to hang out. and i keep seeing them post everywhere of them having fun with their OTHER friends (i don't know them bc they're from their primary schools; we are in secondary school now). and the obvious solution is to hang out with my primary school friends, right? well awesome news I DONT HAVE ANY.

and like ive just been feeling really really lonely especially today. i don't even text anyone except for my best friend, and even then she doesnt really respond properly because its like i dump a lot of messages and 4 hours later she skims through them, rinse and repeat.

(also side note i used to have another best friend but he ended up having a crush on me and didn't give me space so i kinda ended the friendship bc i wasn't comfortable with it)

during my entire TWO MONTH school holiday i haven't gone out with friends. not even once. while i see everyone else my age having so much fun and enjoying life while i just rot at home scrolling through tumblr.

so yeah im not really having a great time. hopefully when i get back to school in january things will be better

sorry for the long rant

Hey, kid (human). No need to apologize for the long rant. Actually, I've got a lot to say about this topic, too, so take a toilet break, grab a beverage and a snack, then sit down with your deal old Bildaddy (platonic, metaphorical) for a chat.

First off, sorry you're going through this. It hurts a lot when friends start fading away, and you realize they no longer consider you as close and you consider them. Feeling left out and like you don't have any real friends seriously sucks.

But it's actually something every single person goes through at some time or another--though most of us aren't brave enough to admit it like you have, because it feels embarrassing and shameful. Like there's something wrong with you.

There isn't.

There is nothing wrong with you.

Friends come and go, and 99% of the time it has nothing to do with you, or anything you've said or done. It isn't your fault. That doesn't mean it hurts any less, but it isn't your fault.

But that being said, I promise you, for every person you see pictures of having so much fun and enjoying life, there are twenty--probably even more--at home like you, scrolling tumblr, or tiktok, or reddit, or whatever the kids are scrolling these days.

And even those people you see posting pictures, that isn't their everyday life. They post pics of the good times, not the bad ones (well not usually) or the boring ones. Especially not the boring ones. I bet they do more sitting at home and scrolling than you think. They're just not advertising that for all their followers to see.

But that's not the point. The point is (dolphins! goats!) your current friends aren't fulfilling your need for socialization. And that means you need to find some new friends, anon.

You can still stay friends with your best friend and that old friend group. As in, don't send them a message officially ending the friendship, and don't delete and/or block them everywhere. You can still talk to them in school when you see them.

(Do unfollow them on social media if seeing them hang without you is upsetting--or better yet, pause on using social media entirely--except for tumblr, of course--until you're in a better place, mentally and emotionally. Bildaddy deleted instagram five years ago and never went back.)

But starting today, back off on asking these friends to hang out, and sending long text messages to your best friend that she only skims through. They're not matching your energy, so you need to start matching theirs. Either they'll notice the difference and start making more of an effort (no, not that kind), or they won't and they won't. But either way, you'll stop wasting your time.

Next, you take all the energy you were spending on your old friend group and start looking for new friends.

While you're still on winter break, there might not be as many opportunities, but there are some possibilities. Do you have any cousins around your age who might wanna hang out? Or maybe there are local events aimed at teenagers you can attend? Check libraries and community centers. Or on New Year's Eve, there might be some sort of Parents Night Out event you can volunteer for and help babysit a group of little kids, along with other teenagers that you could befriend?

Then, when winter break ends, look around your school for other students who might be in your same situation--and trust me there are others in your same situation. Is there someone who always sits alone at lunch? Or what about that kid in class who's too shy to speak up? Is there someone getting bullied or ostracized? Someone new to the school who hasn't made any friends yet? Look for the ones who might need a friend as much--or even more--than you do and try to befriend them.

It won't always work, no, cause nothing always works. But it will work sometimes. And you only need it to work enough times to make a couple friends. And if you make the right friend, they might have a friend group that you can join.

I know it's really scary to put yourself out there and make the first move. But you'd be surprised how receptive people are, especially the shy ones who are too scared to say 'hi' first, and rely on the braver ones, like you, for the human connection they need. Because we all need it. (Even me. Because I'm totally 100% human.)

Other ways to make friends are clubs, in school and out of school, which is probably what adults will suggest if you ask them, so I'm not going to spend much time on this. But they're right. If you're not already in clubs--academic, sports, art, books, music, anime, whatever your interest(s) is--join some! If there's nothing of interesting at your schools, churches and other local organizations might also have youth clubs and activities, too.

Shared interests in a sure way to make friends. I see it happening all the time on Tumblr. Those mutuals you wish didn't live so far away? Well, you can find mutuals just like them IRL! (Especially if you start or join a book club that reads Good Omens, or a tv show club that watches Good Omens)

Another option is getting a part-time job at a place other teenagers work. If this is something you can do without disrupting your schoolwork, try it. Fast food restaurants, cinemas, places like that.

You say you're someone who has the ability to be friends with anyone? Well, prove it! This isn't a threat, by the way. This is encouragement. I'm encouraging you.

Now go out there and make some friends, kid! I know you can do it! I believe in you, and everybody here is rooting for you.

And, as always, have an ox rib (platonic)

[nonbinaryeggrolls]

Battle of the Larynx I

Miguel O’Hara x afab!reader

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3, Pt. 4

Synopsis: Having Spider-Man as a boyfriend was becoming increasingly more difficult, and his reoccurring absence is tearing you apart

A/N: hi y’all! ik ive been so MIA with my stories lately. if im being honest sometimes i just don’t have ideas for new chapters or how to continue in progress stories, but hopefully i can get some more done soon! but for now enjoy this quick Miguel O’Hara story cuz i am OBSESSED with this man atm

Inspired by Battle of the Larynx by Melanie Martinez!

Warning: smut (fingering), toxic relationship, ANGST (yk i fucking live that shit), neglectful Miguel, LONG ASS CHAPTERS

MINORS DNI. AGELESS AND MINOR BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED

You knew what you were getting yourself into when he told you. You knew the nights that laid ahead for both of you filled with his crying and screaming after a failed mission led to a loss of innocent life. You knew the days would consist of hours holding your breath wondering if he was alive or not, and finally exhaling when he arrived there at your doorstep; battered and bloody but still, he was there. That was really the only promised you asked Miguel to keep— be there. You could handle him leaving randomly and not coming home until 2 in the morning, it was his obligation as a hero and that came before anything else. But he also took an obligation as your partner to be present when it mattered most, and according to him he cherished that concept with his life. So if that was the case why wasn’t he here now?

Miguel had been gone for 5 days now, longer than he’s ever been gone for. Five days of nothing, no calls, texts, emails, even an owl with a note would’ve sufficed at this point but he chose to leave you in the dark yet again. You touched up your mascara in the shiny elevator door reflection as you prepped yourself for the celebration party you and your art school classmates planned after you all landed the animation internship. What was supposed to be a chance for your friends to finally get to know Miguel was clearly turning into yet another evening third wheeling other couples. Another night of watching girls curl up with their lovers while you downed a spiked lemonade to forget about yours. This was the 26th time Miguel had abandoned an important event with no notice whatsoever (yes you’ve been keeping track). It started with simple things like picnic dates or small get togethers, then his absence gradually became more impactful. Missed family dinner’s, birthdays…anniversaries. Disappearing for days on end with no check ins, it was becoming torture. It was becoming increasingly obvious that people started to question whether or not you even had a boyfriend, and slowly you did too…

To Miggy 🧸:

please tell me you’re coming tonight, you know this means a lot to me Miguel

4:23

can you just call me and let me know youre alive at least????

4:49

i hope youre chaffing in your suit asshole

8:14

The elevator door opened letting you onto the top floor of Alchamex, it was pointless checking but you always did anyways. You crept your way into his office hoping to see his usual tired figure slumped over in his chair, ready for you to nag him like you usually do to take a break and eat something, but the only thing occupying the space was scattered papers. You looked through his window that towered over the Nueva York city streets trying desperately to hold back the tears that were fighting their way out.

“Y/N?”

Y/N: “Jess! Im- Im really sorry.” You turned your head only slightly so she couldn’t see your puffy eyes.

Jess: “Y/N, you’re part of reception you know you can get in a lot of trouble being up here without authorization.”

Y/N: “I know I know I just…I thought Miguel be here.” You mumbled between hiccups that came up from you failing to hide your sobs. Jess wasn’t stupid, it didnt take a genius to know what you were upset about, or who you were upset about, “If you um… if you see him can you just ask him to come home please.” Working through your sniffles, you wiped your face with your sleeve and made your way out of the office before she even had time to respond

Jess sighed feeling a twitch of anger brew inside her towards the young man, she scowled and muttered obscenities under her breath as she dialed Miguels number…

The next week came and you missed the party entirely, the calls from all your friends and colleagues went unanswered. Honestly, your self esteem couldn’t take another embarrassing, lonely entrance into an event that Miguel was supposed to accompany you too. Another endless night of sympathetic looks and pity hugs. 

The clock read 7:48 pm when you arrived home from work, another day of taking calls and booking meetings for a man that wasn’t even there half of the time. With a heavy sigh you set the bags of groceries you had in hand down in order to get your keys out of your back pocket. The space was dark and cold when you walked in, it had been for the last week. You stocked the fridge with your new groceries then before taking a quick shower and finishing your nightly routine. You were in the middle of applying your night cream when you heard a loud thud causing you to finally leave the bathroom. In the corner of your eye you caught a glimpse of a tall dark figure emerging from the window. You let out a shriek managing to fumble everything in hand as you scrambled to find your pepper spray.

Miguel: “Woah woah! Relax it’s just me! it’s me Y/N!” Usually you’d be used to Miguel’s late night window entrances but it had been so long since you last saw him you forgot he even did it. He turned on the living room light revealing his tired and bruised figure. He was still dressed in his spider suit, the suit you excitedly spent hours on your ipad drawing and redrawing to get the perfect design; now you hated the sight of that thing.

Y/N: “Miguel?”, seeing him gave you relief knowing it wasn’t an intruder, but the anger that’s been stirring in you for the last 2 weeks slapped you back to reality. Silence filled the space between you two, neither of you taking the initiative to speak first. It took 2 weeks for him to come back and you weren’t going to wait another second waiting for him to find the balls to say something.

Miguel: “Y/N please wait!…” he pleaded when you turned away and slammed the bedroom door behind you. You plopped down onto your mattress, you were exhausted and couldn’t stand to look at his face anymore, but you felt the empty bed space behind you dip with his weight.

Miguel: “Congratulations on your internship cariño, I knew you’d get it…” No response. “I…I got this for you. Y/N?” If you turned around you’d see the small gift wrapped box he held in his hand but you were motionless. This new silence terrified him. The possibility of you finally giving up on him made his heart sink a little

Miguel: “Y/N I’m really really sor—

Y/N: “Just shut up Miguel, shut up already…” you finally spoke through gritted teeth, “You’ve never cared about a single thing that I care about, if you did then you would’ve been there like you said you would but you weren’t! SO JUST FUCKING SHUT UP!” you sobbed and curled your legs closer to your chest

Miguel: “I know you’re angry at me… but Y/N I really am sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t call you or text you. I’m sorry it took Jess calling me to make me realize how terrible I was being. I should’ve been there to take you to your friends party, like I promised I would. I wanna be someone you can count on and trust but I’m screwing it all up.”

At this point Miguel had already stood up from the bed, you could feel the floor thump as he paced back and forth trying to find the right words to say to you. You couldn’t help but peek over at him, he looked horrible with his head in his hands and blood and dirt still caked on his suit. Regardless of how angry you felt towards Miguel you always took pity on the poor man. He loved you with everything he was and everything he wasn’t, all he wanted was to be everything you ever needed, but you were the first woman he had ever been with since Dana and Gabriella passed. You knew loving you was like learning to walk again.

You called his name in your soft voice. His head shot up, you were finally facing him with your arms open inviting him in for a hug. Miguel practically jumped from his seat and into your arms. Words couldn’t describe how good it felt to feel your touch and even though he smelled like ash and rubble you felt exactly the same, practically crying as you melted into his hold

Y/N: “I thought you were dead Miggy, you can’t keep putting me through this I can’t take it.” He settled deeper into your embrace and rested his head into the crook of your neck

Miguel: “I know, I’ll be better for you…” You felt his lips latch onto your neck and pepper you in small kisses, “I love you Y/N. I love you so much.” He groaned against you, pushing his stiffened member against your groan and pulling out a desperate moan from your lips

Y/N: “I…I love you too Miggy…fuck!” You screamed has he drove his thick fingers into your already soaking cunt. Every curl and thrust against your plush walls pushed you closer and closer to your edge.

You cried against his shoulders. There were times when the space that was wedged between you two felt infinite then dwindled every time he came back home to you.

It was euphoria, to feel him with you again.

But every high has to come down at some point.

The sound of arguing pulled you from your sleep. It was 2 in the morning when you rolled over to see a space where Miguel was originally sleeping beside you. It wasn’t unusual for Miguel to wake up in the middle of the night to work at the kitchen table or yell to Jess about some other spider variant that messed up a mission; one named Peter seemed to come up very frequently. However it seemed like this specific conversation went on for a fairly long time, you could even begin to here Miguel’s voice shake with whoever he was speaking to.

You slipped on a new t shirt from Miguel’s drawer since the clothes you previously had on had been ripped to shreds. His voice became more and more clear as you made your way down the hall

Miguel: “Do you already have an idea on who it could be?…Fuck. Okay, I’ll *sigh* I’ll be there soon.” He hung up and pinched the bridge of his nose in a mixture of frustration and disappointment.

Y/N: “Youre leaving again aren’t you?” Your voice startled him out of his sulk.

Miguel: “…Jess suspects there’s a spider variant that’s purposely letting anomalies run loose in other dimensions. I have to handle this Y/N...”

7 hours, it took 7 hours to fall into the same old routine. It was honestly amusing at this point, all you could do was laugh. How stupid you were to think things could be any different. How stupid you were to think that HE could be any different.

Y/N: “Are you fucking serious?!” You shouted

Miguel: “Y/N Stop it, not right now please. I need you to just go back to bed and let me—

Y/N: “Let you what?! Let you leave me and come back anytime you find it convenient? How long are you gonna be gone this time Miguel, a month this time? Do you even care about the promise you kept to me? Or do I even cross your mind when you’re out there dimensions away from home playing hero for everyone else but me? This isn’t a hotel Miguel, this is our home! At least that what it fucking used to be!” You fumed. He towered above you but that didn’t stop from getting in his face, “It’s not fair Miguel! You don’t get to leave me alone for weeks and come back and fuck me thinking that’ll make it all better! You have to be better!”

Miguel: “You need to stop acting like you’re the only person in my world that needs my attention! I’m not a monster for putting the safety of the multiverse first. Im sorry I can’t be here to rock you to bed and give you a kiss goodnight all the time. Sometimes we have to put personal matters on the back burner Y/N, it’s called responsibility!” He gathered his phone and the rest of his belongings off the kitchen table

Miguel: “I have enough to worry about as it is, having you and Jess blowing up my phone to go to some party with people I don’t even know doesn’t he—

Y/N: “What?” Your tone was softer and started to become laced with hurt, it was evident in the way your voice started to shake, “Jess called you that night and it took you a week to come back?”

Realization of what he just said settles in and it makes his brows furrow in frustration and both himself and you. When he looks over at you with that same stupid emotionless face he always has you can’t help but boil with anger. His nonchalance towards your problems made you curl your fist until your knuckles turned white

Y/N: “No you’re not a monster, but you are an ASSHOLE for making me believe you could balance work and me! Why are you even with me if you can’t—

Miguel: “This conversation is over, I have a job to do and youre keeping me from doing it.” He cut you off harshly, dismissing your concerns yet again.

Y/N: “I never asked you to sacrifice your obligations! I said from the beginning that being a hero comes first, just make some goddamn time for me now and then! Why Miguel? Why do I have to beg you to see my family at Christmas?! Why do I have to beg you to meet my friends or give me an ounce of attention?! Why do I have to ask you to care about me?!”, This was frustrating him too much, your lack of understanding was infuriating. Miguel had to leave before he said something he might regret. He turned away from you and your manic sobbing and made his way to the window seal without another word, afraid that he might damage things worse than they already were by speaking

Y/N: “If we switched places I wouldn’t DARE treat you as terribly as you treat me—

Miguel: “WELL YOURE NOT ME! YOU SIT AT A DESK AND DOODLE ON A FUCKING COMPUTER! YOUR CAREER IS A JOKE, A CHILD COULD DO WHAT YOU DO. YOU CONTRIBUTE NOTHING TO THIS WORLD, I DO.” His nostrils flared and his eyes burned red with anger, “SO DONT YOU DARE SPEAK ABOUT MY LIFE LIKE YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT, WHAT IVE HAD TO SACRIFICE JUST TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT IN THIS WORLD!”

Y/N: “GOD. YOU ARE SUCH A CUNT!”

Miguel: “AND YOURE A REPLACEMENT!”

Miguels eyes widened and his rampage instantly stopped. You couldn’t believe the words that had just left his mouth, and honestly he couldn’t either. He didn’t mean it at all, he wanted to take back those words as soon as the left his mouth, he just wanted to leave. Why didn’t you just let him leave? He wouldve been right back. The air was thick and uncomfortable, your combined heavy breathing was the only thing filled the space between the two of you.

Miguel: “I…I’ll be right back.” There was a shakiness in his voice and in his movement when he stepped out onto the fire escape.

Y/N: “Dont come back. If you leave tonight…don’t come back Miguel.” You spoke in a tone barely above a whisper

Miguel: “We’ve said things we don’t mean…I’ll be back later to fix things.” His suit integrated onto his body and he leapt off of the building ledge. A blur of blue and red was the only trace he left behind.

The truth was out now, how Miguel really felt towards you. You were never a first priority or even a second or third, you were nothing but a soul to fill the space where something else was missing. His wife, his daughter, you never tried to stand in their place or become what they were to him, but now you knew that’s the only reason Miguel kept you around. You were his vice

Your heavy cries carried throughout the apartment as you laid in bed cradling the maroon cardigan that was in the gift box Miguel got you.

The spider society headquarters was empty and calm, but the office at the top floor was anything but. Miguel sat atop of his hovering platform brooding in silence in front of his computer monitors, It’d been like this since he arrived. Miguel was always stern and reserved, he never held a conversation with anyone other than Jess or Lyla so him being fairly quiet was normal. But for Miguel to not say anything at all was strange, and it didn’t take long for others to take notice of his behavior shift since leaving your apartment

Margo, Peter, and Jess were the last people at headquarters, after a long day of interrogating potential rogue variants the crew was finally successful and able to apprehend Spiderman on Earth-3360. What will happen to the young man wasn’t decided yet but catching him was a cause for celebration. The group sat around the cafeteria table sharing empanadas and Soju for a few minutes before they went back to their own universes

Margo: “Yeah Ive been in his office all day with him and Lyla and he’s barely said 2 sentences, he wasn’t even mean during interrogation. It’s like he didn’t have it in him to yell. I think he’s depressed or something.”

Peter: “I thought he was always depressed, that’s like his thing isn’t it? That’s why he’s not funny.” He joked and finished off the last empanada

Jess: “I don’t know but I need to get home, my back is killing me and I can’t deal with The Grinch any longer.” She said taking letters hand to help her up from the chair.

The group said goodnight to each other, Margo logged off and Jess went home to some much needed rest, honestly this line of work seems too dangerous for a pregnant woman. Peter made his way up to Miguel’s office, who he knew could hear the entire conversation thanks to his enhanced hearing.

Peter: “You know they’re right Miguel…” he shouted up to Miguel who was brooding on his platform

Miguel: “About what?” he asked in a condescending tone

Peter: “About you, you don’t think we’ve noticed you moping around all day. Do you wanna tell me what the deal is so you can stop pouting?” he swung onto the platform and took a seat next to Miguel, crossing his arms and sitting firm in place waiting for Miguel’s response but he was met with silence, “Is it the rogue variant? Cuz we’re not gonna let this happen again…”

Miguel: “No.”

Peter: “Miles? Gwen? Ben?”

Miguel: “No it’s none of them.” He turned his attention away from him and focused on organizing the handful of papers on his desk

Peter: “Then what is it? Is it Y/N?”

Miguel: “Did I say anything about Y/N?! Why even bring her up?!” He snapped, it was exhausting having to work and act like every terrible thing he said wasn’t weighing on his mind. Miguel couldn’t even interrogate the variant with losing focus, having to have Jess switch him out is gonna remain one of the most embarrassing points in his Spider-Man career. Peter was never a first choice for a sounding board, but it was only going to get worse for Miguel if he didn’t turn to someone for advice, because Lord knows he was terrible at handling relationship problems on his own

Miguel: “I said something bad, really really bad Peter…” he confessed. He took a seat in the chair next to him

Peter: “Do you wanna be more specific?”

Miguel: “I told her that her career was a joke. Then I called her…a replacement.” Peters eyes widened, he knew Miguel was capable of harsh words, he’d seen it first hand with Miles but this was unexpected. Especially with you, the girl he fawned over and practically stalked at work until you made the first move.

Peter: “Shit, Miguel. That’s really messed up…Did you mean it?” He asked

Miguel: “No of course not! I didn’t mean any of it, I was just frustrated. I’m not the bad guy for prioritizing my duties! She just wasn’t listening Peter, she wasn’t understanding any of what I was saying or where I was coming from. I didn’t mean what I said.”

Peter: “So why did you say it?!” Peter exclaimed

Miguel: “I DONT KNOW!”, He slouched over in his chair and cradled his head in his hands, his own words made him sick to his stomach. How he urged to tell you how guilty he was for what he said, for never being there, for making you feel like you didn’t mean anything, “I just wanted her to be quiet, everything she was saying was right but it made me feel guilty and awful. I wanted to make her feel worse than I felt. God I’m so fucking dumb…”

Peter: “You know I’m not good with this, it wasn’t long ago that I was a sad piece of shit too with a partner at home who basically couldn’t stand me. That being said, I also know that when it feels like nothing you say can make up for everything you said, and you said A LOT, maybe too much. I would never say something like that, that was insane…”

Miguel: “Peter…” he said through gritted teeth

Peter: “Sorry sorry, that being said when it feels like there’s nothing you can say that could make up for everything you said, a simple apology means more than you think it does. A real apology Miguel.” Peter looked at him, he didn’t need words to know that Peter was basically tell him to finally get his shit together.

Miguel: “What if she doesn’t accept it?”

Peter: “She will if you mean it…”

Passing buildings were a blur to Miguel, he was racing home so fast he couldn’t even focus on anything around him. While he swung from structure to structure he planned out every single thing he’d say to you, how he’s sorry for failing you in this relationship and he’d change for the both of you. He even tried to remember if there was still cinnamon in the spice cabinet so he could make you your favorite comfort drink, champurrado.

Miguel soon landed on the fire escape outside your apartment, you made a habit of leaving the curtains open for him so he could see if you were up or not and now it was an involuntary part of your routine. He peeked inside and saw you sleeping peacefully on your bed, hoping to come join you he tried to open the window but it wasn’t budging.

‘Had you locked it on purpose?’ He thought to himself, no you couldn’t have, you always left in unlocked for him. But when he saw the book you had used to block the window from being moved he panicked. Miguel knocked on your window, frantic and desperate

Miguel: “Y/N! Y/N! Unlock the window!” He pleaded. His knocking stirred you out of your sleep and you sat up in your bed, your puffy eyes on full display. When you finally looked over at him you were emotionless just as he was to you, it terrified him seeing you look at him with no longing or affection

Miguel: “Let me in…please cariño”, he begged

You were so tired, you were so tired of wondering why your boyfriend left you to question his love for you and now after tonight you know why. You stood face to face with him, the window still a barrier between you and him. It ate away at you but you couldn’t stand another night asking yourself why you weren’t getting the love you deserved. You had your answer and you didn’t need Miguel around anymore, not if you were going to be another substitute for what was missing.

Miguel: “Y/N…Y/N please wait!—

You closed the curtain in his face and went back to bed but it didn’t stop his knocking and pleading, begging for you to let him in and mend what he broke. It continued for an hour until you were convinced he eventually gave up and left. Him being gone finally gave you a chance to break down once again into your sheets, but Miguel sat on the fire escape listening to every choked out sob and hiccup you let out. Every painful cry the he caused you and now he wondered if he’d ever be able to fix it.

[galaxywarp]

hi blue!! i hope you don't mind this message, you can totally ignore it no big deal! my walk in closet ever since i moved into this place 3(?) years ago has always been horrendously messy like everything i had that I didn't want my cat to get to or didn't have a place for it to go went in the closet and ive been thinking lately about how upset and embarrassed i am about it and the opportunity arose for me to get it clean before one of my friends comes over in the morning so i Did That Damn Thing and it Did take literally the whole day with many breaks but it's done! and it's beautiful! there's no more trash in there and the floor is visible and i can walk from one end to the other instead of just standing in the doorway and most importantly!!! i found my high school diploma that i thought i had lost and I haven't been able to get a copy of it and i've been terrified of getting an interview and being asked for it and being unable to provide it and it was such a relief that i started crying for real about it haha;; like!! the physical proof that i accomplished something once was back in my hands, yknow? and i'm just very happy about it and none of my friends are awake for me to tell but i wanted to tell someone and i saw that you had cleaned your room earlier too, so! yay for us!

💖💖💖 literally so awesome good for you :’)