#so many characters.. what a doozy
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Ok a serious ask this time, who do you think watches the Olympics
i think they all watch it!!! the ones most invested tho would probs be clem, lee, omid, luke, pete, sarah, alvin, maybe rebecca, javi, gabe, mariana, aj, louis, marlon, mitch, maybe willyâŚâŚâŚ. i think thatâs all i can think of atm
#so many characters.. what a doozy#clemster asks#twdg#the walking dead game#twdg clementine#twdg lee#twdg omid#twdg luke#twdg pete#twdg sarah#twdg alvin#twdg rebecca#twdg javi#twdg gabe#twdg mariana#twdg aj#twdg louis#twdg marlon#twdg mitch#twdg willy
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Finished season 1, and may I just say, with my whole heart,
Fuck Yeahâââ
#Tyto watches GF#me scream-laughing through the callback gags#(with great solemnity) ''Get 'im... đ''#and then STAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#man the zero-to-one-hundred character development for him in the last three or so episodes of the season was FUCKING NUTS#Stan-and-Mabel bonding episode. followed by Stan-and-Dipper bonding episode. both of which were REALLY moving.#and then the PHONE CALL WITH THEIR PARENTS???#I AM FILLING IN SO MANY BLANKS HELLO đđđđđ#and then now this PORTAL THING WHAT THE FUCK#like OKAY OKAY YEAH I have had all the major stuff spoiled via fandom osmosis obviously#so I know the gist of where this is going#(and WOOOO BOY the wax figure episode was a DOOZY with some of this foreknowledge lmAO)#but I am still on the edge of my seat for the reveal itself because I don't know how it's actually going to happen#BRUH THINGS ESCALATED SO FAST AAAAAAAAAAAA
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Listen, I know this might sound untrue, but Arthur IS mostly a bad dudeâor at least not as good a man as some claim. (I love him still but hear me out)
This is not me arguing âheâs bad so you shouldnât like/glorify himâ at all, I promiseâI canât stand that rhetoric. Itâs just that I see a lot of âheâs so kindâ âso good at heartâ âso hard on himselfâ and I wonder why folks so often adamantly, un-ironically claim him as a misunderstood gentle giant type.
The fact that heâs mostly nice to those he cares about and is willing to help strangers in need (never mind both of those things are optional anyhow, you can just as easily play him as an asshole who doesnât come to anyoneâs aidâ) doesnât undo the harm heâs responsible for throughout the game. Nor does him being told to do so by an authority or being a victim of circumstance undo it.
His good doesnât make up for his bad, and I donât think it actually needs to. His bad certainly doesnât take away from what makes him compelling and likeable to the audience; but within the context of his world, heâs right to be unhappy with who he is. Itâs not a matter of low self esteem or self worth issues, his unhappiness with himself comes from self awareness.
(Saying this with a grain of salt because you know, fictional character with no real agency whose actions are as such for plot reasons), he may have had a shit hand dealt to him, but heâs a person who makes bad choices. Heâs charming and relatable (and hot lol) but Iâm not sure I understand the whole simplifying his character to âgood person stuck in bad situationâ thing, when it plainly isnât the case, no matter how much we like him.
I think the âyouâre a good man Arthurâ line gets thrown around as proof of him being good at heart; but I think itâs more like, he needed to hear it to act as such. He needed to be told how to be good and pushed into reflection and immediate actions. He needed to be told that heâs a good man by others because he needed permission in a sense to be different than he knows himself to be. (Take a shot every-time I say good)
âThe Thomas Downes mission was out of characterâ it really isnât. He says what kind of man he is multiple times, he hammers the point home that heâs a bad man. And while there is definitely a bit of self loathing in that sentiment, heâs still speaking his truth. Heâs just unhappy with it; he IS the type of man to commit an atrocity like beating a dying man for a few bucks. It goes against the beliefs fans have projected onto him, usually coming from their own moral compass instead of what the character shows his own to be, and thatâs why it âfeels so wrongâ to see him doing something actually despicable.
We arrive at this misunderstanding due to fandom projection, as well as this rampant desire to problem solve by âfixingâ the canon material to fit a sort of agenda. Ie, âI only like the good attributes in this characterâ âitâs only acceptable to like this bad dude provided heâs always feeling guilt for his actionsâ or âheâs not really at fault for them.â
But the thing is, even if Arthur is at conflict with his actions, the guilt he may feel isnât an indication of anything pure within him. Heâs in total control and chooses still to go along with everything. I tend to think an action done in guilt is functionally the same as an action done with enjoyment. Arthur feeling bad at the end of the game for his faults and complicity doesnât mean he is good. Nor does it mean he âwas a good the whole timeâ, nor does it excuse what heâs done.
We donât have to make him a better person than he is in order to like him, is what Iâm trying to say I guess. Itâs fine to acknowledge all parts of him, to do otherwise does a disservice to his character as it often flattens them beyond recognition. And itâs also fine to hone in on what you appreciate most and write and draw and celebrate that while functionally ignoring the rest if you so chooseâbut itâs also fine (and usually important) to acknowledge who the character is without the plethora of projections placed upon them.
Arthur ends the game with a loving act, more or less saving John, saving Abigail, Tilly, paving the way for them to become something better than he was. None of these things are meant to be a great action done to save his soul or redeem him in any eyes, especially not his own. He dies on a good note (and yeah I would say low honour/back for the money is still a âgoodâ choice for a low honour story), and shifts his focus to the last good deed heâs done in his final moment as a way to leave off peacefully despite all his wrongdoings. He doesnât get redemption really, and he doesn't wholly achieve 'goodness', despite all the potential for growth the audience can see in him, thatâs the deliberate tragedy of it all.
#i know im forgetting so many things that would change the tone of what im saying so take away is this; i love him and i love ooc him#but flattening the character and reducing them to their best or worst traits alone is a type of simplification im thinking we should all#grow out of#boy that was a doozy#sorry if that got nonsensical#I usually skip analyses stuff or essays and commentaries but this was rattling in my brain for a while#not to be negative but one of the worst parts of fandom to me is when a character/story gets lost in translation due to fanon#and I think thatâs rampant here especially and not just for arthur#but what do I know yk#NOT a character critical post I love him heâs my wife and son in one too precious for this world yadda yadda#arthur morgan#rdr2#red dead redemption 2
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an innocent man doesn't stand a chance (j.yh)
summary:Â it's halloween and your boyfriend has a fantasy. he wants to be the masked killer and for you to be the final girl, and he wants you to run.
note:Â this was written in a feverish haze of ghostface yunho brainrot, you can thank this fanart and this edit for making this one about yunho, but i have to give all credit for the idea to the nsfw audio creator augustinthewinter who's masked hookup audio killed me. also please read the warnings, this one is potentially very triggering.
warnings: ghostface!yunho x final girl!reader, boyfriend!yunho, hard dom!yunho, girlfriend!reader, sub!reader, sadism, masochism, knife play, primal play/chasing, threats of violence, heavy cnc that really looks like noncon because part of the play is that he wants her to struggle and say no BUT there are consent checks explicit throughout, rough sex, fingering, gloves, masks, breath play, impact play, mirrors, finger sucking don't look at me, dry humping, clothed sex, ripping off clothes, size kink, ass play, lots and lots of degredation including use of sl*t/wh*re/fvcktoy/c*cksleeve, yunho is seriously mean in this i'm not kidding, fear, forced orgasm, orgasm denial, creampie, subspace, there's more i'm sure but this one is a doozy. also lots and lots of aftercare!! after a scene like this i had to write detailed aftercare and confirmation of limits, so that's there too! yunho is v sweet when not in the zone.
pairings:Â yunho x reader
genre:Â smut and more smut, no plot in sight
word count:Â 7.9k
The party is in full swing when you arrive. The house bumping with music and every corner decorated for Halloween. Youâre late enough that you can just slip in through the back door, and that was the plan from the start. Yunho arrived first, nearly two hours ago, and made excuses for why you were late, for how you might not even make it to the party. No one would see either of you come or go together, so when you both disappeared to play your game no one would ever know. You had come up with the plan in bed, whispered fantasies and what-ifs between the sheets as he rewarded your willingness to try something new with his tongue.Â
His fantasy is special, and to do it right you can really only do it on Halloween night.Â
You weave through a throng of drunk acquaintances, searching the crowd for him, but itâs not as easy to find him as you thought it would be. Youâre not sure how a six foot something Ghostface killer could hide from you in the crowd of your friendâs house party, but no matter how many rooms you check you canât see him. Nervousness pits inside you as you check your phone and see nothing. He could be caught up with friends, he could be changing his mind, but you canât tell if you canât find him.Â
Adjusting your very 90s costume, you dart away from the kitchen where a group of your girlfriends are pouring shots and weave your way into the back of the house. Maybe you can call him? Text him? Would that completely ruin the mood of psycho killer stalking? Maybe, but itâs been forty-five minutes and you havenât so much as seen a sliver of his mask.Â
You flick through your phone, checking for any new messages, and then scroll to find Yunhoâs contact card in your phone. Your finger hovers over the call button as you lean against the quiet hallway wall, and then in your peripheral vision you see it.Â
A dart of black, something looming, and when you finally turn your head, you see him. Ghostface, standing wide and imposing in the hall, blocking any way past him and back out into the party.Â
âSpooky,â You sigh, tucking your phone away.Â
Silently, Ghostface nods his head.Â
The hair on the back of your arms stands up. This is it.Â
âWhat? Are you looking for the bathroom or something?â You take a step or two towards him, leaning into the character you dressed for.Â
He shakes his head.Â
âLooking for me?â You bite the inside of your lip to keep from smiling.Â
Slowly, he nods.Â
âMm,â You raise a brow at him, âwhatâs the line from that movie? You wanna play psycho killer?âÂ
His head tilts slightly to the side and he nods once again.Â
âAnd who do I play?âÂ
He takes a step towards you and you fade back.Â
Fear starts to spread through you, even with it all being pretend, you canât fight the feeling that your subconscious drums up in your gut.Â
He takes another step, and then another, and then youâre running.Â
Spinning on your heel you push deeper into the house, away from the party and towards a line of doors down the hall. Your heart is pounding out of your chest, your stomach a bundle of nervous trembling knots, and your hands are so slick with sweat you can barely grab the door handle of the basement. Itâs not as easy to run as it looks in the movies, especially not in a tight skirt and penny loafers, and you skid down the basement stairs taking them two at a time until you slip forwards and crash down onto your hands and knees.Â
You donât have time to assess the sudden sharp pain as the skin of your palm drags over the concrete floor though, so you scramble up in a flash and in a panic you weave your way deeper into the basement.Â
Itâs familiar enough to you, your best friendâs parentâs place. You know thereâs a tiny half bathroom in the far back corner, a rarely used guest bed against one wall as you descend the stairs, a collection of old video games and movies, and then around the corner to the left more and more basement, more storage, more dusty nooks and crannies to hide. Youâre frozen for a split second, trying to decide the best place to go where he wonât find you, but heavy footfalls on the stairs ring in your ears like drum beats and you donât have time to weigh your options.Â
You take off towards the bathroom, fumbling with the door again when you reach it.Â
The masked man behind you doesnât say anything, but you hear him moving. His feet are sure and quick, the heavy fabric of his robes making a whooshing sound as he darts forwards to try and close the space between your bodies.Â
A panicked sound leaves your mouth as you tumble into the sink, clocking your hip hard on the porcelain and bracing yourself on the wall. Turning you reach back for the door, if you just get it latched maybe you can give yourself a second to think, to shimmy out of the very small, high set window. Pushing yourself into action you grab the door, heâs so close you can hear his breath, seconds away. Seconds away.Â
The door stops abruptly as you throw your body against it, six inches from closing. You push again, but it doesnât budge, and when you look down itâs clear youâve lost this game. His heavy black boot is firmly set in the doorâs path, and you know thereâs no chance for escape.Â
He crowds you instantly, leaving you no time to recover, his body pushing into the cramped space of the bathroom and flinging the door backwards into the adjacent wall. You stumble into the sink and he moves right up against you, the firm length of his body pinning yours in place.Â
For a moment everything is still, completely and shudderingly still with only the sound of your hitched breathing and thundering heart filling the room. Youâre not sure what you should do - beg? Plead? Stay silent and let him do what he wants?Â
The masked manâs head tilts to the side as if heâs observing you, something you canât tell through the ghostly plastic of his mask and dead black eyes. Youâre trembling for real, hands shaking as they grip the cool porcelain. Ghostface leans into you, one of his gloved hands reaching for your face, a soft brush against your chin at first that turns to pressure as his fingers slide up your jaw to push you face to the side. Itâs like heâs studying you, his hand slipping lower and dragging down your throat.Â
Your breath comes faster, stomach tight.Â
Ghostface closes his hand around your throat and your eyes widen. He holds you like this for a moment, his other hand locking down over your waist and gripping you tight, pinning you in place.Â
When he squeezes, panic bubbles through your body.Â
Yunhoâs never choked you before. Heâs never even suggested it, despite all your little jokes about how nice his hands would look around your neck. It seemed pretty clear to you that within the bounds of your relationship that was one thing he just wasnât interested in, but whoever has you in the bathroom knows exactly how to hold your throat and where to press. Part of the fun is not knowing whoâs beneath the mask, but your body still locks up, and an anxious voice inside you starts to wonder - what if? Itâs not as if Ghostface is that rare of a costume choice, you see dozens of them on the street every year. Itâs not inconceivable to think that at this party there would be more than one.Â
Your heart beats in fluttering fits and starts in your ribcage as your mind turns over this possibility, and then he squeezes. The fight comes back into you full force when you hear him sigh, his hand tightening even more and cutting off your airway. You wriggle in his arms, pushing against his chest and trying to use your hips for leverage, a startled whine ripping from your throat, but fear laces through your body as you shove against him and realize just how immovable he is.Â
Ghostface releases your throat, the same gloved hand slipping into the back of your hair to hold you steady.Â
âNo!â The word tumbles out of your mouth as soon as you can properly make noise again.Â
He crowds you more, masked face dipping by your ear, âShh, shh,âÂ
You freeze.Â
âSafe word?â Yunhoâs voice is a balm in your moment of sudden panic, his tone low and hushed.Â
âT-treasure,â You manage it, the realization coming back into your body that this isnât a total and complete stranger, itâs still him. Your fear starts to melt into anticipation.Â
He gives you a squeeze, just one gentle pulse with his hand on your hip to communicate that heâs heard you, âColor?âÂ
You take a second to assess yourself. This game is intense in a way that youâve never experienced. Yunho had tried to tell you how your body might react to this kind of manufactured fear, how it would play tricks on you, how even if you knew it was him your body would still have the urge to fight and flee. You knew it, but you didnât really understand it until this moment.Â
Yunhoâs gloved thumb drags lovingly over your cheek for just a moment, âColor?âÂ
If he has to ask you a third time heâll end the scene, you know he will, but the brief flicker of tenderness in his touch reminds you of everything you already know about him. He has you. Youâre safe. This is a game.Â
âGreen,â You finally answer, âIâm green,âÂ
One more quick pulse to your hip, heâs heard you again. More than that, heâs pleased with you.Â
His shoulders straighten as he draws to his full height, his body filling the space of the tiny bathroom and caging you in. You swallow tightly, audible in your ears and then he moves fast.Â
His hands around your waist, lifting you up and then shoving you back until youâre sitting on the lip of the porcelain sink, uncomfortably balanced and pushed back flush to the mirrored wall behind you. You yelp when he moves you, hands scrambling for purchase on something, gripping the sleeve of his black cape in desperation. Fear and anticipation pulse through you, but he doesnât give you a rest to get your bearings.Â
He shoves your legs open wide and slots between your thighs and shoves your face to the side until your cheek is squished against the cold mirror, his hand a controlling brace from your jaw to the crown of your head.Â
âYou look so pretty running from me,â He strokes your face, but this time itâs not loving, it's possessive, itâs pure control.Â
You grip the edge of the sink and whimper.Â
âShould we play a little game?â He teases, âItâs Halloween, you must like scary movies,âÂ
Your breath quickens, âY-yeah,âÂ
He drops his voice low, in a mimic of the movie, âWhatâs your favorite scary movie?âÂ
Youâve heard Yunho do that voice before, lazing on the couch last October when you had yourselves a movie marathon, the day he realized something about your favorite scary movie that turned you on, the day you called him out for being hard during a kill scene. It took a year for you both to work up the courage to actually act on any of those fantasies, but here and now with his mask on and his voice low, you feel that mix of terror and arousal bleeding through your body in a way only he can elicit from you.Â
You canât help the little smile that passes over your lips, âScream,âÂ
âMeta,â He teases, pinching you hard on the thigh, âfor every question you get wrong, Iâm taking something off you,âÂ
You swallow hard again.Â
He reaches into his black robes and then you see it, shining in the reflection of the mirror and in your hazy peripheral vision. The glint of a real knife is unmistakable, the cool sharp edge of the steel crystal clear and you canât stop the actual fear that jolts through you. You jerk in his hold, instinct driving you for a split second, and he pushes your face harder into the mirror.Â
âTch,â He makes a disappointed noise with his tongue against his teeth, âthe gameâs no fun if you donât play.âÂ
He wonât hurt you, at least not in ways you donât already like. You have to trust that.Â
Settling yourself with a slow breath you summon the act he wants, find the fear within yourself and let it inform your words to give him what he wants.Â
âPlease, donât,â Youâre trembling is real, that you know.Â
He shifts between your legs, drawing the knife closer, shifting it in his hand so he simply presses the cool flat side of the blade against one of your nipples. You hiss at the sensation, tightness building in your gut.Â
âFirst question,â He drags the knife a little over your nipple, âWhat movie franchise is Jason from?âÂ
Itâs an actual quiz, of course it is. At least heâs starting off easy.Â
âFriday the Thirteenth,â You reply fast.Â
âCorrect,â He lifts the knife, and with the blade pointed away from you, he pushes up your tight tshirt until itâs bunched above your breasts.Â
âI got that right,â You glance down at the way heâs touching you, breaking his own rules already.Â
âJust getting a better view,â He insists, and then the cool knife is against your nipple again, only the thin fabric of your bralette between skin and steel.Â
Your body is aching in this position, but you can feel the heat off his body, and the heady tone of his voice from under the mask still has you starting to ache in different places.Â
âLetâs make this a little harder,â He taps the knife against you and you shiver, âwhat movie has a group of teenagers being stalked on an island by a killer fisherman?âÂ
âItâs,â You start to answer but he taps the knife again and you jolt, âfuck, itâs I Know What You Did Last Summer,âÂ
You watched it with him two weeks ago. You remember it, clear as day.Â
âWrong,â The knife twists, the tip gently skating over the swell of your breast.Â
âWait,â You start but he tips the knife under the center of your bra.Â
âI Still Know What You Did Last Summer,â He clarifies the sequel, âthey werenât on an island in the first movie. I thought you liked scary movies,âÂ
âI,â You press back into the wall as the knife edge kisses your skin, âI⌠I do,âÂ
âYouâre not very good at this,â He twists the knife and drags the sharp edge out so that it severs your thin bra in half, falling open and revealing your breasts to his wandering eyes.Â
A little gasping sound leaves your lips, a desperate noise you try to bite back, but he hears it.Â
He hums a soft, amused laugh and suddenly the knife is gone, sheathed and away and he leans into your space again, âYou fucking like this, donât you?âÂ
âNo,â You insist, despite the way your stomach is in tight knots.Â
âDid running away get you hot?â His gloved hand skims over your exposed body, âDo psycho killers make you wet?âÂ
âFuck,â You whine, âno, no,âÂ
âLiar,â He whispers, and then he delivers a pointed slap to your thigh, âspread.âÂ
Your legs widen instinctively at his command, but he doesnât reward you or praise you like he normally would, this is different. He reaches under the hem of your taut mini skirt, finding the apex of your thighs, and his fingers gently rub up and down from the base of your slit to your clit. A tiny gasp bubbles out of your throat.Â
âAre you afraid?â He all but growls.Â
Your stomach flips and his hand tightens in your hair, âY-yes,âÂ
âTell me you donât want this,â He finds the edge of your panties and drags them to one side.Â
âI donât want it,â You answer him, body shaking now.Â
âTell me to stop,â One gloved finger presses into your entrance, the softness of the leather and the warmth of his skin beneath it making you tremble.Â
âStop,â You beg, âplease, please, stop,âÂ
âWhy would I?â He slowly pushes inside, stretching you around his finger, âWhen I know how wet being fucked by a stranger in a mask makes you,âÂ
A tense thready sound pulls from your throat as he adds a second finger.Â
âIf you donât want this,â He pulses his hand once, forcing both fingers deep into your slick channel, âwhy are you panting like a dog in heat?âÂ
âN-no,âÂ
âIf you donât want it,â He whispers, âdonât come.âÂ
Your eyes shut as his hand starts moving, a steady pulse of his gloved fingers inside your aching cunt, curled just right in the way he knows gets you off fast. A pumping drag against your g-spot, the sound of his heavy breath, the unmistakable sensation of your own wetness making a mess between your thighs.Â
âLooks like you want it to me,â He adds the circle of his thumb against your clit and you jerk in his hold.Â
âStop, fuck,â Your nails dig into his forearm.Â
âYou donât want me touching you, but youâre soaking my fingers,âÂ
âN..No, no,â You babble, heat pooling in your gut.Â
âFight it,â He pumps his fingers faster, drumming against your sweet spot, âdonât come,âÂ
You hiss sharply, pleasure dropping low in your belly, the sensation of his gloves and his hot hand too much to bear.Â
âMoaning like you want it,â He laughs, pulling his hand suddenly out from under your skirt and yanking your head back to center.Â
You yelp at the position change and the sudden lack of contact but he doesnât make you wait for long.Â
âOpen,â He smacks your cheek lightly.Â
Your mouth falls open and he shoves both gloved fingers between your lips. You choke against the suddenness, at the way he presses down on your tongue, blinking to clear the haze from your eyes.Â
âSuck.âÂ
You shiver, your lips closing over his digits, the sharp taste of leather mixed with your fluids assaulting your senses and you canât fight the moan, the way your eyes drift shut as you swirl your tongue.Â
He hums, pleased, âDoes it hurt?â He asks.Â
His question doesnât make sense, and you blink your eyes back open to look up at the cool passiveness of his ghostly mask.Â
âPretending youâre not a whore?â He clarifies and your mouth stills over his fingers. He pulls them out, delivering one more pointed slap to your cheek, and dives back down to plunge them back into your aching cunt, âMoaning like that, your nipples rock hard, and this pussy,âÂ
You choke, a bubble building in your core as he abuses your slick channel again.Â
âClenching around my fingers, sucking me in,â He chuckles, âI can feel you, baby,âÂ
âFuck, fuck,âÂ
âHold back,â He doubles his efforts between your thighs and you keen, âif you donât want it, tell me to stop, donât come,âÂ
âStop!â You whine, giving him exactly what he wants, âPlease, please,âÂ
âNo,â His thumb rubs fast, his hand practiced at making you fall apart at the seams, âyou come, you keep your eyes open, and you come all over my fucking hand,âÂ
Your breath is fast, heart pounding, and you feel the cord tightening in your belly in a way that makes you want to rub yourself back up into his touch but he has you pinned, stuck, at his mercy just like he wants.Â
âCome,â His voice is clear, authoritative, and familiar. Like a trained response, your body releases and cracks open into a desperate orgasm, crumbling in his hands as you pitch forward onto his shoulder and grind your hips down to take the last little bit of what you need from his fingers.Â
When his hand stills, you realize youâre still clinging to him and you jerk back, one hand over your mouth as you try to recover your breath.Â
He steps back, his hands sliding off you and body slotting out from your thighs. You canât see Yunho beneath the mask, but you know heâs looking. You can feel his hot gaze sliding over your body and taking in every wet and shaking inch of you. Your body is throbbing with need, but the game isnât done, he hasnât even made you touch his cock yet, and you know thereâs no way youâre making it out of this basement without that.Â
âTell me again how you donât like it,â He finally says.Â
You shiver.Â
âCat got your slutty little tongue?â He prompts you again, voice hardening.Â
You swallow hard, finding your words, âI didnât like it,âÂ
âMhm,âÂ
âI d-donât want you to touch me,â You lie.Â
âYeah?â He teases, âWell then run,âÂ
âW-what?â Your eyes flick up to the impassive plastic of his mask.Â
âIf you didnât like it, why are you still sitting there?â He takes a step to the side, clearing your path to the door and you slide off the edge of the sink, your loafers making a click onto the tile floor.Â
You swallow hard, eyes darting out to the rest of the basement.Â
âCome on,â He teases, and you can hear the sick smile in his voice, âtry to get away,âÂ
You look between him and the room ahead of you again.
He leans forward and you shiver, his gaunt stretched mouth at your ear again, âI canât fuck you if I canât catch you,â his gloved fingers yank your top down over your exposed breasts and he chuckles, âbetter run fast.âÂ
You spring forwards, adrenaline pumping through your body and blood rushing in your ears. Leaping out of the bathroom he gives you a couple steps to get a head start, but heâs so much bigger than you, his stride so much longer, and he closes the distance with ease as you scramble in mock terror to get to the steps.Â
Yunhoâs arms close around you, hauling you up off your feet and against his chest, his touch rough and probing as he drags you up into the air.Â
âNo!â You shriek, âFuck!â
âYou think Iâd really let you go?â He laughs, âAfter that?âÂ
âFuck you!â The words bubble up out of your mouth.Â
âThatâs the idea,â His hand slides down your belly, closing over your cunt and cupping you tightly.Â
Your body is reacting before your mind, and you jerk in his hold, kicking back your leg and catching him in the shin with the flat heel of your shoe.Â
He groans and wrenches you higher in the air, âKeep struggling,â he pants, âI like it,âÂ
You twist again, trying to free one of your arms, but he has them pinned tightly to your body, âGet the fuck off me!â
âNot a fucking chance,â He takes two wide steps to the mattress and then tosses you down.Â
You collapse onto the bed, the old and rarely used springs creaking under your weight, and your scramble forwards in some kind of an attempt to get your bearings, but heâs on you just as fast. He yanks you back with a hand around your ankle and in a flash heâs on top of you.Â
He presses one hand firmly between your shoulder blades, keeping you pinned face down to the bed, and then his body weight drops down as he straddles the backs of your thighs. Your hands curl into the bedding beneath you, rough sheets and scratchy camp blankets, nothing soft and soothing to take a moment of comfort in.Â
His free hand wanders, searching your body slowly. The sound of the party raging upstairs drowns out any competing noise, but you can still hear his heavy breath against the mask and your pounding heart, the sound of anticipation thick in the air around you.Â
Yunho presses his hips forwards and you feel the thick hard length of his cock through his costume nestled against your backside.Â
âLook at you,â He palms your ass, âshaking for me,âÂ
A whimper leaves you as his fingers dig into your back.Â
âDo I scare you, baby?â He delivers a harsh slap to the back of your thighs and you yelp, âAre you fucking terrified?âÂ
Another slap leaves you trembling and you hide your face in the mattress, pressing your eyes shut tight. You love when he touches you like this and he knows it. You bite down hard on your lip to keep from whining, wetness pooling in your core. He wanted you scared, he wanted you fighting, you canât give in just because his glove on your stinging skin feels like sin.Â
He groans, his cock pressing down harder to your ass and you feel both his hands slide from your hips up to your back and back down again until he has a grip on your waist.Â
A whimper slips out from between your lips. Â
Yunho freezes above you, his thumbs massaging a quick circle into your lower back, âColor?âÂ
âGreen!â Your voice is muffled by the bedding but you know he heard it.Â
He groans, pulsing his hips to rut his cock against you again.Â
Even between layers of fabric, you can feel the heat of him, throbbing and ready for you. Your mouth waters as you picture it, cockhead leaking precum and Yunhoâs familiar hand wrapped around the base as he directs it to your mouth.Â
âLittle slut,â He chuckles and it pulls you straight out of your mental fantasy, ârubbing that ass on a strangerâs cock,âÂ
Your stomach clenches, and you twitch under him.Â
âThatâs fucked up,â He drops his body weight over you, one hand pushing your head to the side as he leans over you, âyouâre so fucked up, arenât you?âÂ
Your breathing is fast, a thready sound in your throat.Â
âArenât you?â His voice is low, a shade away from a growl, and he rocks his hips again to rub his cock against you.Â
âN-no,â You try to shake your head but his hand tightens against your scalp.Â
âLiar,â He keeps grinding against you, his free hand snaking underneath your bodies to grope your breast, âI know a needy whore when I see one,âÂ
You moan into the sheets as he tweaks your nipple, tears springing to your eyes as he palms you, taking you apart with every touch.Â
âLetâs see how you like this,â He pinches your nipple once more and you squeal at the sharp sensation that rockets through your chest, a sharp line down to your clit, and then he slides back and shuffles back to sit up over your thighs.Â
He pushes the stiff fabric of your mini skirt up over your ass and then you feel the cold metal again.Â
You jerk underneath him, and he tuts softly, the sharp edge of the weapon gently dragging over the curve of your ass cheek.Â
âTell me,â He grips your flesh tightly with one hand, painfully pinching, âdo you still like scary movies now that youâre in one?âÂ
You shake your head, a whimper on your lips when the knife slips under the edge of your panties, âP-please, donât,âÂ
He yanks the knife up and splits one side of your panties with a taut snap of fabric, âPlease?â He taunts, âPlease?â
You sob softly in response.Â
âIs âpleaseâ all you can say?â He delivers a sharp smack to your exposed ass check and you jerk under him.Â
âI canât,â You shake your head into the sheets, âI canât,âÂ
He sighs, and you feel the knife shred the other side of your underwear and then you hear the sound of the blade clattering to the floor. With both hands free he palms your exposed flesh, squeezing you almost painfully and inspecting your exposed body.Â
Shivers run through you, and you try to hold yourself still for his touches.Â
âWhich hole should I fuck first, hmm?â His fingers search you, probe you.Â
Your body locks up tightly, a gasp on your lips. You hadnât discussed that, and you shake your head.Â
âScared?â He ghosts his fingers over your rim.Â
âPlease,â Itâs all you can manage.Â
âBeg me,â He presses down with his thumb, âbeg me not to fuck your ass if youâre so scared.âÂ
You scramble in the sheets but he has you stuck, âPlease donât, donât fuck me like t-that, youâre too big, itâs too,âÂ
He massages one cheek and hums, âWhat should I do then?âÂ
âWhat?â You crane to look back at him, at the masked man pinning you down.Â
âBeg,â He says it like heâs bored, like itâs obvious, âbeg me to put it somewhere else, or I will fuck this pretty ass open and make you say thank you.âÂ
Heat floods your belly, your body a sizzling live wire, and you fall right into step with a heady whine, âPlease, fuck my pussy,âÂ
âAgain,âÂ
âFuck my pussy, please, Iâm begging you,â Your voice sounds needy and strange even to your own ears, âI need it inside me, g-give it to me please, fuck my pussy, please,âÂ
âBetter,â His hands disappear into his robed costume and then he pushes forwards, his cock finally free and sliding up and down your slit to find your aching entrance.Â
âY-yes,â You drop your head back down to the bed and in one sharp thrust, he pushes his thick length all the way inside you until his hips are flush with your ass.Â
Yunho groans, bracing himself with one hand on the back of your neck and the other on the bed beside you, the mattress creaking with every shift, âNeedy pussy,âÂ
âFuck,â You moan.Â
âGreedy,â He punctuates his words with a sharp thrust, starting to pick up the pace now in earnest, âgripping my fucking cock like that,âÂ
All you can do is hold on, bite down on the sheets and let him use you, focus on the sensation of his impossibly hard cock driving in and out and in and out.Â
âAre you crying for me? Hmm?â He rolls his hips, the fabric of his costume dragging against you as he fucks into you faster.Â
Your eyes are wet, pleasured tears bubbling up and you nod, a tiny sob passing through your lips.Â
âGood cocksleeve,â He presses down harder with his hand on your neck, forcing you lower into the mattress.Â
Your back arches instinctively, and you whine at the angle change. A few more thrusts and youâll be done for, you know it.Â
âThatâs it,â He pants, voice muffled by the mask, âcome for me,âÂ
âC-close,â The words tumble out.Â
âCome for me,â He stays steady with his thrusts, pushing your orgasm closer and closer, âcome for me, come for me,âÂ
âAh!â You fist the sheets, legs starting to shake, âAh, fuck, fuck!â
âCome on this strangerâs fucking cock,â He grunts, shuddering above you, his fingers digging into your skin and no doubt leaving a bouquet of bruises behind.Â
So close to the edge, just a little more will tip you over, and you whine, âHarder,âÂ
He gasps, forcing his pace to clap harder, deeper, and it only takes two pointed thrusts of his cock into the deepest parts of you to send you careening over the edge.Â
âComing,â You twist beneath him, moaning into your fist, âoh, god,âÂ
âFuck,â He curses as your muscles clench and flutter around him, âfuck, oh fuck,âÂ
Your orgasm has your body locked up and shuddering, but when he pulls free suddenly you gasp into the bedding, âN-no, no, please,âÂ
He yanks off any scrap of clothing you have on with frantic hands and then rolls you in the sheets so that youâre lying on your back spread open for him. You try to form a sentence, to ask whatâs happening but suddenly heâs tearing off his mask and the world slows to a stop.Â
Yunhoâs sweaty, flushed pink in the cheeks eyes blown wide with need, his plush lips parted and his chest heaving with labored breaths. In a flash heâs stripping off the costume, peeling off his gloves and kicking off his boots.Â
âCome here,â He spreads your thighs wider and presses down over you, his cock finding your entrance with ease as he sheaths himself again in one thrust.Â
You moan sharply and wrap your arms around his shoulders as he collapses over you.Â
âNeed you,â He pumps his hips, âhave to have you,âÂ
Pleasure crackles up your body, âYours,â you nod, âIâm yours,âÂ
He presses his mouth to yours, kissing you hot and hard, âFuck,â he groans.Â
Yunho gathers you closer, your slick bodies now flush together as he rocks into the warm cradle of your hips, ânever heard you moan like that,âÂ
Your walls clench around him.Â
âYou wanted me to do this,â He groans between messy kisses, âyou wanted to run,âÂ
You nod, lips pressed together.Â
âYouâre so fucking perfect,â He pumps into you harder, like heâs desperate to get as deep as possible, âmy dirty girl,âÂ
âOh, fuck,â Your head falls back against the bed, a pleasured moan caught in your throat.Â
âMy little fucking slut,â He groans, tipping your hips open wider, his hands tight on your skin, âso desperate to come on stranger cock,âÂ
You whine sharply, nails digging into his back.Â
âSay it,â He threads a hand through your hair and tugs your head back up roughly, âsay it,âÂ
âYes!â You whine, âYes, I-I need it,âÂ
His gaze darkens, the cool mask of your dominant returning, and he slaps your cheek sharply, just enough to give you a pointed sting, âNeed what?âÂ
Your brain is soft, fuzzy with pleasure, but the slap focuses you and you blink, âNeed to come,â you pant as he thrusts into you, âon a strangerâs cock, need you to⌠fuck, need you to take it,âÂ
He nods, lips parting open in pleasure, âThatâs right,âÂ
Your stomach tightens, pressure dropping low in your belly and you canât stop feeling the way his cock punches into the deepest parts of you over and over again. Your eyes close tight and you hold onto him, one of your hands slipping up to his neck to tangle into his black hair.Â
âOh,â Youâre so close, almost there, âY-Yunho, oh, god,âÂ
His hips thrust forward once more, burying his cock impossibly deep and then he stops. Thatâs when you realize your critical mistake.Â
âIs my cock so good you forgot your manners?â He says and your eyes fly open.Â
You donât know what to say, you donât know how to recover, your head is too mixed up to know whatâs up and whatâs down and youâve never played a scene where heâs a stranger before. Youâre used to your rules, youâre used to calling him sir or daddy or master, but now you feel unmoored.Â
âNow you donât get to come,â He leans back, taking your wrists in his hands and pushing them down flat to the bed.Â
You know better than to protest, but youâre sure he can feel you shaking.Â
He drops closer, pinning you open with the weight of his body, his head nudging yours to the side, âMaybe youâve forgotten whoâs in control here, baby,âÂ
Liquid heat spreads through your body and you shake your head just a little.Â
âSo drunk on cock,â He bites at your ear, âyou forgot you donât want this,âÂ
Your pussy tightens, and you hear him chuckle.Â
âFilthy,â He maneuvers your arms above your head so that he can close both your wrists together in one of his large hands, âfucked up little fucktoy,âÂ
Your eyes roll back and you fight the urge to move your hips, his words enough to put you on the precipice.Â
A sharp slap stings over your exposed breast, your nipple hardening even more and Yunho draws his hips back before slamming forwards, driving you deeper into the squeaking mattress. At the painful stretch, the sharp sting inside, you do cry out.Â
âDoes it hurt?â He thrusts again, just as hard.Â
You struggle under him, a little for play and a little because it does hurt, but you love the way he groans when you please him and you canât stop, âY-yes,âÂ
âToo bad,â His hand claps over your mouth and then he starts to fuck you again for real.Â
Pleasure and pain in equal parts spike through your body, a perfect combination to get you right up to the edge of orgasm, but you know youâre not allowed. You moan into his hot hand, the sound feral and taut, tears gathering in your eyes and slipping down your temples into your hairline.Â
Yunho slides the hand on your wrists up to clasp your hands together palm to palm, still pinning you to the bed but offering you a line of communication you desperately need in a scene like this. He doesnât stop, but his eyes find yours in the dim light of the basement and he squeezes your hand once. You squeeze back just once, your silent sign to keep going.Â
He keeps driving into you, cursing every time you moan and clench around his thick length, the mask of dominance slipping again as he starts to rut into you with artless, needy thrusts. Heâs chasing his own pleasure now, with no regard for your own release.Â
âNo oneâs coming to help you,â He groans, âyouâre mine,â
 You canât hear everything he says, not with your mind spinning so close to a forbidden orgasm and his pants and groans punctuating every few words, but you hear it when he says heâs coming inside you.Â
Thrusting deep, he spills himself hot in your belly, hips grinding into yours to milk himself dry as he moans into your ear. The bubble of your own pleasure builds with every rock of his body and you whimper into his hand, tears spilling over as you try not to let it take you.Â
Yunhoâs hand pulls away from your mouth and suddenly his fingers are rubbing fast and firm on your swollen clit, his cock still buried deep.Â
âAh, n-no, please,â You grip his hand tightly and lock your eyes closed, trying to pull yourself back from the edge, âplease,âÂ
âFuck,â He groans, overstimulated.Â
Youâre going to come, thereâs no way to hold back if heâs going to torture you like this and you thrash under him, âI canât,â youâre sobbing in earnest now, âI canât hold it,âÂ
âShit,â He curses sharply, âcome, sweetheart, come, Iâm so sorry,âÂ
At his permission, your pleasure rips through you, a hot slice of rapture rocketing up your body. Your ears are ringing, black dots over your vision, and your body wrenches up with tight shakes in a way that only a soul shattering orgasm could do. You vaguely hear your own voice, a babbled string of âthank-yousâ and sobs, but it feels like someone else. All you know is warmth, and the deliciousness of earned pleasure.Â
When consciousness starts to creep back in, the first thing you feel is Yunhoâs gentle hands on your cheeks. Heâs murmuring something, but it takes your mind a second to process, and you blink your eyes open slowly to find his face.Â
âHey,â Heâs back to soft and warm, your tender lover, âoh, there you are,âÂ
âMm,â You manage.Â
He looks you over slowly, warm brown eyes flicking over your skin, âDoes anything hurt, sweetheart?âÂ
You shake your head, still boneless and trembling in the scratchy blankets.Â
âHmm?â He nudges you, pushing for a verbal response.Â
âIâm okay,â You respond, but your voice is small.Â
Yunho, so attuned to you, looks back up and shifts up the bed to meet your eyes, âFeeling floaty?âÂ
âMm,â You nod, recognizing distantly that the intensity of your play tonight pushed you right into subspace.Â
âAh,â He smiles warmly, âcome here,âÂ
He gathers you close, arms wrapping around you as he tucks you into his chest and pulls the plaid camp blanket up higher over both of your naked bodies. His skin feels so essential, a necessity like eating or breathing, and you nuzzle into his warm chest.Â
âYouâre okay,â He soothes you, stroking your back, âyouâre safe, youâre safe with me,âÂ
A heavy breath releases from your chest.Â
âThatâs it,â He kisses your forehead, âbreathe with me, relax with me,âÂ
Your muscles release one by one.Â
âThat was just a fantasy,â He soothes you, easing the knotted up feelings in your body with practiced words, âit was just pretend,âÂ
You nod.Â
âJust pretend,â He murmurs, lips tender against your forehead, ânone of that was real, nothing I said. I love you, and I will always keep you safe, sweetheart,âÂ
Your fingers relax, and you realize how firmly you were gripping his arms.Â
âThere you go,â He murmurs, âIâve got you,âÂ
âYunho?â You manage, your body feeling heavy once again as you start to center.Â
He shifts, cupping your cheek as he leans back to get a good look at you, âRight here,âÂ
âH-hey,â You give him a lazy smile.Â
He nods, brushing your cheek with his thumb, âTell me where you are?âÂ
âBasement at the party,â You answer.Â
âGood,â He nods, ânow tell me who youâre with?âÂ
âYou, Yunho,â You reply, practiced now at the routine he uses to help ground you out of the scene and bring you back into reality.Â
âGood,â He continues, âtell me three things you can see,âÂ
You glance around the room, âOld playstation, bicycle,â you look back to him, âyour necklace,âÂ
He smiles as you touch the silver chain around his neck, âGood,âÂ
You stretch your stiff limbs in his arms and try to snuggle back into his hold but heâs not done yet, especially after a scene that new and that intense.Â
âAny pain?â His hands slide over your body.Â
âNo,â You assure him, âa little sore, but I feel good,âÂ
He nods, but keeps looking you over anyway. When he turns your hands in his and finds your scratched palms a little line forms between his brows, âWhatâs this?âÂ
You look down at the red skin, a few shallow cuts here and there, âI fell,âÂ
âFell?â His brow goes high with alarm, âwhen?âÂ
âWhen I was running, I took the stairs too fast,â You tell him honestly, âbut it doesnât hurt, I promise,âÂ
His fingers trace over the broken skin and he nods, âYou promised youâd call the scene if you got hurt,âÂ
For how rough this man can be with you, for how many times heâs bruised you and made you bleed, he never fails to surprise you at just how tender and soft he is outside of the bedroom.Â
âBaby,â You close your fingers over his, âyou promised youâd trust me to know my own limits, Iâm not hurt, I got a little scrape,âÂ
His lips close as he considers your words and then he nods, leaning in to kiss each of your palms warmly, âI want to disinfect these at home,âÂ
âOkay,â You murmur.Â
âAnywhere else?âÂ
âMm-mm,â You shake your head.Â
âBut sore?â He confirms.
âA bit,âÂ
His fingers find your jaw, massaging the muscle there, âWhen we get home, weâll run a warm bath. Iâll take care of all your aches, I know I was rough with you,âÂ
You sigh pleasantly, relaxing into the warmth of his hand and he nods, dipping his face towards yours and capturing your mouth in a soft kiss.Â
âYou did so perfect for me, sweetheart,â he says softly, voice threaded with emotion, âIâm so⌠is it too lame to say honored? I⌠you were so amazing, and you trusted me like that and I,âÂ
âYunho,â You smooth back his hair and pull him closer, âIâm alright,âÂ
His eyes flick over your face, âYeah?âÂ
âYes,â You give him the clarity he needs to know he didnât hurt you, âyou made me feel very safe, even though I was kind of terrified,âÂ
He stays quiet, like heâs gauging the honesty of your words.Â
âEven when I was scared,â You lean in, kissing him quickly, âI knew you wouldnât take it too far, and you checked in with me. Iâm okay, I liked it, I love you,âÂ
âYou didnât push yourself too hard for me?â He always worries about that, the double edged sword of a submissive whoâs desperate to please.Â
âNo,â You smooth your hand over his cheek, âI liked it alot,â
He nods and snuggles you closer, his fingertips coasting up and down your back softly. Heâs quiet for a few minutes, just letting you both come down as easy as you can with thrumming house music upstairs.Â
âYou liked it?â He finally confirms, carding his fingers through your hair.Â
You nod, âA lot,âÂ
âWhat I said,â He kisses the top of your head, âduring, about you liking it, that was fantasy too, you know that right?âÂ
Youâre quiet, taking in his words.Â
âThereâs nothing wrong with it,â He continues softly, âthereâs nothing wrong with you for wanting it, all of that was pretend, okay?âÂ
âI know,â You kiss his chest, nodding against his shoulder.Â
âI love you,â He squeezes you, âyou know that too, right?âÂ
You smile, wiggling up in his arms to see his face, âI do,â you kiss him softly, âI love you too,âÂ
He nods and sighs, âI lost my head a little at the end there,â he admits, âI didnât communicate well when you needed it, Iâm sorry about that.âÂ
Your brows knit together in confusion.Â
âI should have given you permission sooner,â He explains, brushing your cheek with his thumb, âI forgot myself in the scene, I didnât mean to push you so hard.âÂ
âOh,â You smile, âYunho, Iâm alright,âÂ
âI know you are,â He dips in for a kiss, âbut Iâm still sorry,âÂ
âThank you,â You murmur, pressing your lips back to his, staying warm and still and soft in this moment together, âI know youâll always take care of me,âÂ
He nods, his broad hand brushing down your hair.Â
âHow was the party?â You nudge him a little.Â
He smiles, âFine,â he shrugs, âI was too focused on looking for you, I think everyone thinks somethingâs up with me.âÂ
âIâm sure itâs fine,â You laugh.Â
âMm,â He nods, âand now I disappeared and we made a mess of this basement,âÂ
âFuck, I canât believe you cut my underwear off, how am I supposed to get out of here,âÂ
âI brought backups,â He grins wide, proud of himself for thinking that far ahead.Â
âYouâre a genius,âÂ
âThere is a back door out of the basement though, right?â He looks up around the room trying to find one.Â
âYeah,â You reach out, pointing around the back corner, âwhy?âÂ
âItâs extremely obvious that youâve been fucked within an inch of your life,â He presses a quick kiss on your forehead and stretches next to you, so casual about the way he just rearranged your insides, âand Iâm not so sure youâre going to walk straight,â
You laugh sharply and shake your head, âTake me home,âÂ
âScary movies on the couch?â He squeezes your thigh as he rolls away, searching for his clothes.Â
You shiver, âMaybe, that might be too close to home,âÂ
Nudging your knee he smiles, âDonât worry, baby, itâs just a movie.â
#ateez smut#ateez#yunho smut#yunho#jeong yunho#yunho x reader#yunho fic#yunho ff#ateez fic#honeyhotteoks fics#honeyhotteoks#HAPPY KINKTOBER
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Mr. Mxyzptlk decides to have some fun and decides itâs time for some bodyswapping shenanigans. Behold, a list of varying bodyswaps I think would be neat to explore:
â
Jack Fenton and Clark Kent
Jack being Jack and getting used to his powers and being INCREDIBLY confused that he woke up NOT in his bed, not next to his incredible wife, and assuming this is a ghosts shenanigans. Clark is freaking out because heâs human, not next to HIS incredible wife, assumes this is a Mxyzptlk plot, and cements himself as an incredibly good father figure with Danny and Jazz, reaching out to other Supers for help to teach Jack the ropes and to wait out whatever Mxy has done.
â
Artemis swapping with Jazz
during an Outlaws mission and DURING some test for Jazz. Both freak out, both have to adjust to the other persons strengths and abilities, and Jason and Bizzaro have to calm a very confused and scared teenager whoâs in an Amazonian body. While Dannyâs friends are DESPERATELY trying to stop Artemis from throwing hands with every ghost she sees.
â
Johnny 13 and Jason Todd
Jason Todd is dead again. Not Good. Johnny is alive again. This ROCKS! Jasonâs Red Hood goons lock him up because their boss is clearly compromised. Jason figures a way out of the Ghost Zone and asks Phantom for help. Along with having to acclimate to being able to control a sentient shadow and ghostly powers, Jason is in for a doozy. Johnny on the other hand, is going through many many attempts to escape Red Hoodâs room and failing⌠until Red Robin crashes through a window. Apparently he should have answered the calls on Red Hoodâs phone. Red Robin near instantly clocks that whoever is in Jasonâs body, isnât Jason. Ok, time to bring Not Jason to the Batcave to figure out whatâs going on.
â
Vlad Masters and Alfred Pennyworth
Instant character change from both parties. Alfred is midway through talking to Bruce about over exerting himself and Vlad is midway through nearly successfully capturing Phantom.
â
Paulina and Wonder Woman
Paulina having to adjust with Amazonian strength and being lassoed by another party to figure out whatâs happening in full (prolly Batman and his paranoid ass wanting the absolute truth <3). Diana having to adjust with being an average teenage girl whoâs also high up on the Highschool food chain and pretending nothing is wrong until she can contact the League to figure out what just happened.
â
Tucker Foley and Dick Grayson:
Tucker swapping with Dick while Dick is at the Batcave. Heâs too busy marveling at the tech and not really registering that heâs Not In His Body until he hears a roar of a motorcycle somewhere in the distance (One of the Batfamily coming back to the cave), and his reality comes crashing down. Tucker is mid ghost capture when Dick swaps with him and realizes VERY quickly that heâs not in his body and proceeds to go âfuck it. This hero he doesnât know is genuinely struggling and he needs to blend in until he knows whatâs going on. Dick doesnât know this guys fighting capabilities but he has to AT LEAST know how to dodge well and aim well (Spoiler alert: Tucker doesnât.
â
Danny Fenton and Martian Manhunter
DANNY IS AN ALIEN! THIS IS THE COOLEST THING EVER!!⌠Danny also has absolutely no idea how to shapeshift so heâs stuck in Jâonnâs true Martian form and uncontrollably shapeshifting random parts of his body out of stress because he can hear *everyones thoughts* within a few miles. Dannyâs grown to be a quick learner with powers but with all this noise he just. Canât. Concentrate. Jâonn doing his damndest to act as a regular human boy while not panicking about having absolutely zero telepathy. Heâs told the boyâs friends after they noticed something wrong. He found out midway on the walk to Samâs house that Jâonn can turn invisible quite easily. Itâs not the same as it is in his body but itâs not too different, kind of like flexing a different sequence of muscles to create the same movement.
#Mxyzptlk is a very chaotic being so I avoided Danny and Batfam as much as humanly possible bc this man wants chaos and not the common#situations they get thrown in. heâs a fifth dimensional being. he knows about fanfic tropes and dpxdc 100%#I LOVE the Jack and Clark one if someone uses it Iâd love you forever#dpxdc#danny phantom#dp x dc#bones prompts
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Double the Fun
Pairing: Eren Jaeger x f!reader x Reiner Braun
Rating: Explicit â MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
Word Count: ~3.9k
cw: next-door neighbors Eren and Reiner, modern day au, all characters are mid-twenties, explicit language, p*rn no plot, smut â threesome, vaginal sex, anal sex, anal play, spit play, nipple play, cunnilingus, face-riding, blowjob, hand job (M/M), double-penetration, multiple orgasms from the reader, sex toy use (anal plug), cream pies (in both holes), Reiner is a bit of a perv and sniffs panties (just like how he sniffed Historiaâs letter in the finale LOL), pet names (baby, sweetheart, sweetie), slight degradation (use of slut, cock slut, whore, and cock sleeve to address the reader), slight breeding kink, sex without a condom (assuming reader is on some form of birth control)
Summary: Youâve been having a bit of a dry spell recently with how busy youâve been at work. When you finally manage to snag a date with one of your online dating matches, youâre unfortunately stood up, leaving you in a worse mood than before. Lucky for you, your two hot neighbors are more than willing to cheer you up. Â
Authorâs Notes: Phew! This one is a doozy! Please make sure you read the content warnings before reading. This is filthy and shameless; I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! I LOVE Eren and Reiner together, idk, they just always scratch this everlasting itch I have. Iâm still getting used to writing threesomes, so I hope this is okay! Also, this is my first foray into butt stuff and I may have awoken something inside me, LOL. MDNI divider by the loveliest @/cafekitsune. Thank you for reading!Â
Taglist: @batafuraikisu @neverlandlostchild @bloompompom @dprkento @a-listaire @man-knees @slvt-for-smut @antique-remains @aiyaaayei
part 4 of to all the boys who live next door anthology series
âAre you sure you donât want me to sit, like, two tables away? What if this guy is sketch?âÂ
You can spot the obvious concern in Pieckâs voice through the speaker of your phone, which is currently face-up on top of your vanity as you get ready. You finish the last steps of your makeup, inspecting yourself in the mirror, satisfied. âDonât worry, Iâve got pepper spray in my purse in case he tries anything funny,â you assure your best friend. Itâs been a while since you last went on a proper date. Pieckâs always been a worry-wart about you meeting strangers from your online dating apps, constantly reminding you to stay vigilant. Tonight is no different.Â
âYou should at least let your hot neighbors know that youâre going out, so they can keep an eye out for you,â she suggests, throwing that in casually. Ever since you moved in a few months ago, sheâs been rooting for you to hook up with either of the two men next door, Eren Jaeger and Reiner Braun. Sheâs met them plenty of times in passing and would much rather you date one of them instead of the countless of mysterious men on your current roster.Â
Thereâs no denying that theyâre attractive. Eren with his long, dark hair, striking eyes, and toned physique. Reiner with his sharp jawline, broad shoulders, and well-groomed goatee. They also happen to be incredibly friendly towards you, always greeting you in the hallway with a genuine smile, asking how your day went or what youâll be up to. Theyâve invited you for dinner on several occasions, which has always been pleasant, sometimes leaning towards the flirtatious side. Youâre sure theyâre just nice guys, cordial neighbors looking out for one another. Thereâs nothing more to it than that, even if a small part of you wants there to be.Â
You step back from your reflection, checking yourself out once one more. âIâll be fine, Pieck.â
âWhat if I canât reach you? There should be at least one other person whoâs aware of your whereabouts, right?â This is what binging too many true crime documentaries does. Still, youâre grateful for your friendâs concern, knowing itâs all out of love. You can tell sheâs actually distressed about this, so you end up agreeing, mostly to appease her. She wishes you well before hanging up as you slip into heels by the door.Â
You tug at the hem of your skimpy black dress, hand motionless on the doorknob. Itâs your first date in over a month. Work has been so busy that you havenât had time for romance or sex. The variety of sex toys tucked away in your drawer has been your only solace these past few weeks. To say youâre ready for some real action is an understatement. Youâre also incredibly nervous, afraid youâve lost your groove. Thatâs why youâve taken extra measures to fully prepare yourself for anything tonight.Â
With a deep breathe, you step out into the hallway, following Pieckâs advice. You knock on your neighborâs door and Eren is the first to answer. His expression brightens when he realizes itâs you. âHi,â he greets you, flashing that charming smile of his. He scans you up and down, taking in your appearance. âWow.â
âIs that a good wow or a bad wow?â you grin, twirling for him.Â
He swallows hard, checking you out once more. âDefinitely a good wow.â
Itâs that extra boost of confidence you need for this date, so youâre appreciative of him. âThank you, Eren. Youâre always so sweet.âÂ
He crosses his arms over his chest, smirking. âSo, hot date tonight?â
You decide to be honest with him. âYeah. Itâs been a minute, so Iâm a little nervous.â
âDonât be. Any guy would be lucky to date you.â His eyes twinkle at you kindly.
You imagine Pieck screaming at you from twenty miles away, begging you to date Eren instead of going out with this random swipe right. Eren is simply a sweet guy paying his neighbor a compliment. Thereâs nothing more to it than that. Before you get the chance to thank him, Reinerâs deeper voice calls out from inside the apartment. âWho is it?â
Without taking his eyes off you, Eren answers with your name. Soon, the blonde joins him, jaw dropping when he notices you. âFuck.â
Eren elbows him in the chest, to which Reiner mutters a strained apology. âSorry. You just look amazing.â
The flattery is almost too much, cheeks warm with embarrassment, stomach fluttering. âThank you.â Reiner is usually the more forward of the two, blurting out whatever is on his mind, though youâre not complaining.Â
Grinning, Reiner asks, âSo, whoâs the lucky guy?â
âSomeone I met online. My friend said I should let my wonderful neighbors know my whereabouts tonight, in case I end up missing,â you explain casually.Â
âHow morbid,â Eren chuckles. âWeâll keep an eye out for you later so that your friend doesnât have to worry.â
âI would appreciate that.â
Reiner raises a brow at you. âUnless youâre planning on sleeping with him. We probably wonât see you if it does go well.â He hunches forward when Eren lands another blow to his chest, shutting his roommate up.Â
You giggle, agreeing with him. âNo, youâre totally right. Iâm going to stay optimistic and say that if I donât come home tonight, thatâs a good thing.â
âWeâll hope for the best, then,â Eren replies, beaming.Â
You turn to leave, waving farewell to them. Reiner yells out, âHave fun tonight! But not too much fun!â
~~~
You return to your apartment complex less than two hours later, heels clicking loudly on the tiled steps, feet heavy with disappointment. After taking a twenty-minute taxi ride to the restaurant you agreed to meet him at, you proceeded to wait an entire hour only to realize that youâve been stood up. No text, no reply, no call. Youâve been made a fool, completely humiliated, the night and the rest of your weekend absolutely ruined by this assholeâs no-show. Â
It takes you a while to dig through your purse for your keys, patience already worn thin. Frustrated, you groan out loud, staring up at the ceiling. âWhy me?â
In the worst timing ever, the door to your left swings open. Eren pops his head out, saying your name curiously.
Reluctantly, you turn to face him. âHey.â Â
He comes out, dressed casually in sweats, hair wrapped in a messy bun with the few stray strands draping the back of his neck. âThat was quick.â
With an unconvincing smile, trying to hide the shame that currently consumes you, you admit, âI got stood up.â
His demeanor changes instantly. The concern on his face is endearing, and when he drifts towards you, he reaches out, then drops his arm, unsure how best to console you without crossing any lines. âNo way.â
You nod, sighing. âItâs true.â
âFuck, Iâm so sorry.â He steps closer to you, hesitantly placing his hand on your shoulder, testing the waters.Â
You smile at him, enjoying this simple touch of comfort. âItâs fine. It is what it is.â
The two of you linger like this, Eren gazing into your eyes, holding you. His palm is hot on the fabric of your dress, and for a split second, you wonder how pleasant itâd be on your bare skin. And maybe itâs your wishful thinking or your desperation for human contact after being rejected tonight, but you can feel the heat of a spark between you now. Before you let your fantasies drive you to do something unprecedented, you search your bag again, finally retrieving your keys. He lets you go, watching you shove them into the keyhole, unlocking the door. âAre you okay?â
In all honestly, youâre not, but thereâs nothing him or anyone else can do about it, right? âIâll be okay. Sucks that I got all dressed up for this, though. What a waste.â
He doesnât respond right away, choosing his words carefully. âWell,â he starts, the faintest blush tinged on his cheeks. âIt doesnât have to be.âÂ
You stare at him, heart beating faster, making sure youâre understanding him correctly. âReally?â
He clears his throat, licking his lips. âYeah. Maybe we can get some use out of it.â
âWe?â
As if on cue, Reiner emerges from inside their apartment, having heard everything. âFuck that shitty asshole. Youâll have way more fun with us.â He stands next to his roommate, grinning at you.
This time, you do listen to Pieckâs voice in your head, yelling at you to go for it. To let these two alluring neighbors of yours take care of you the way you deserve. Already feeling better, you give them a coy smile, opening the door to let them in. âOkay, then. Come on in.â
~~~
Itâs the first time theyâve ever been inside your apartment, though you save the formal tour for later. As soon as the three of you are inside, door shut, shoes off, theyâre both kissing you fiercely. Eren faces you, slipping his tongue into your mouth, hot and heavy. He caresses your sides, squeezing the curves of your body through your dress. Reiner is behind you, grip just below Erenâs, firm on your hips. His lips brush delicately on the nape of your neck, groin pressed to your backside, the bulge protruding from his pants growing harder and harder between your ass cheeks. You moan into the kiss, pussy throbbing in your lingerie, eager to be touched by either man, by both of them. Why did you even bother trying to hook up with strangers online when the perfect matches were beside you all along?
Reiner chuckles, breath hot on your ear, voice low and rugged. âYouâre really horny, arenât you? All dolled up and ready to be fucked, huh?â There he goes again, blunt and straightforward and so fucking sexy, exactly what you need tonight.Â
And here is Eren, soft and gentle, committed to kissing you, whispering sweet nothings any chance he gets. âYouâre beautiful. Such a gorgeous girl. So pretty for us.â Also exactly what you need.Â
You lead them into your bedroom, Eren flipping on the light switch, keeping his lips on you while Reiner strips out of his clothes, starting with his pants. Eren does the same, hoisting his shirt off, revealing his impressive figure. You attempt to slip out of your dress, but Reiner stops you. âKeep it on,â he rasps, down to his underwear now, boner more obvious, poking out from his briefs. Â
Eren pinches your butt, snapping the tight fabric to your skin. âWeâre not letting this go to waste, remember?â
You nod mindlessly, brain hazy with lust, too eager to be fucked. âFuck me,â you beg, spit smeared all over your lips.Â
They both laugh softly, walking you towards the bed. âSo impatient, so needy,â Eren coos, positioning himself in front of you, toying with the hem of the skirt.
Reiner sits up against the headboard, propping you up on his lap, your back pressed to his muscular chest. âWhatâs the rush, baby?â he teases, licking a stripe behind your ear. âWeâre going to take care of you. Right, Eren?â
Eren bites his lip as he works your dress up past your thighs until itâs bunched up at your hips, exposing your soaked thong on your wet cunt. âOh fuck yeah,â he huffs, salivating. âGonna make you feel so good. Make you come so fucking much.â
You spread your legs wider for him, a pathetic whine escaping your throat, more and more desperate by the second. He hooks his finger on the crotch of your panties, smirking at the string of arousal that stretches between the fabric and you. âSo fucking wet, holy shit.âÂ
He tugs it all the way off your legs, tossing it over to Reiner, who brings it up to his nose, taking a big whiff. âSuch a slut for wearing these on a first date. Our naughty girl.â He lets your lingerie fall from his grasp onto the floor, sliding to the plush of your thighs, keeping your legs spread apart.Â
Eren dives in, spreading his wide tongue flat on your clit, moving it side-to-side, stimulating you into your first orgasm. Your knees twitch from the sensation, the pleasure rippling through you like waves of ecstasy. You turn your head towards Reinerâs, opening your mouth, pleading him for a kiss. He obliges, sticking his tongue inside you, slurping up your saliva, hungry for it. âYouâre so fucking nasty,â he growls, reaching for the drawer beside the bed. âBet you have toys hiding in here. Why donât we have some more fun and play with them?â You whimper wantonly, keen on the idea of Reiner using whatever he wants on you to make you come again.Â
He finds exactly what heâs looking for: your precious anal plug, tapered on one end, heart-shaped gem on the other. When he pulls it out, he barks out a laugh, almost like he canât believe his luck. âYou really are a whore,â he whispers in your ear, sinister and wicked, about to have too much fun with this. âDid you prep yourself to be fucked in the ass? Be honest.â Even Eren pauses, peering up at you, curious.Â
âYes,â you mewl, squirming with arousal, body tingling all over.
Erenâs chuckle reverberates against your clit, releasing you from his mouth to lap at your wet slit. âGood girl,â he muffles, collecting your cum on his tongue. âSo perfect for us.â
The dynamic between them spurs you on, Eren playing the good guy, Reiner playing bad. Both of them work together with a common goal in mind: to cheer up their pretty neighbor from what would have been a bummer of a night. But already, youâre thankful that you were stood up; youâre certain now that this is the much better alternative.Â
âEren, switch spots with me,â Reiner demands. âAnd you,â he says, giving you a quick peck on the cheek. âOn your stomach.â
You both obey him without protest. Eren leans against the headboard with a dazed look in his eyes, licking his shiny, cum-coated lips. He smiles as you gaze up at him, wrapping your fingers around his shaft, stroking him. You open wide, tapping the tip of his dick on your tongue before sinking down on him until youâre too the hilt, swallowing him into the back of your throat. He cups yours cheeks, caressing you gently. âSo fucking pretty with my cock in your mouth. My gorgeous girl.â You accept the praise shamelessly, relishing the distinct taste of him.
From behind, Reiner worships you, squeezing your ass cheeks, spreading them apart to ogle at your fluttering hole. Without warning, he hocks a frothy wad of spit directly onto it, teasing his thumb on the rim. âFuck, baby,â he utters as you moan on Erenâs cock. âIâm gonna put it in now, okay?â
You nod, taking Eren deeper, your nose pressed to his groin, drool leaking from the sides of your mouth, bracing yourself. The plug is slick with lube as Reiner pushes it in carefully until the heart-shaped jewel is flush to your hole. He swears under his breath, marveling at the sight before him, cock pulsating in his fist. You stay like this for a while, adjusting to the toy inside you. It really did help that you prepared for this earlier.Â
âSo sexy,â Eren murmurs from above you, staring on your backside. âYou take it so good, sweetheart.â
âLike an obedient slut,â Reiner adds, using his thumb to push the plug the slightest bit deeper. He lifts your hips to position himself below you so that youâre straddling his face. âCan you come again, baby?â
âOf course she can. Sheâs our good girl,â Eren purrs, petting your head softly as you continue to blow him.Â
Reiner eats you out sloppily, different from Eren, whoâs intentional with his every move. It sends you into another frenzy, pushing you closer and closer over the edge, especially when he begins playing with the plug, pumping it in and out of you slowly. Youâre overstimulated with Erenâs hot cock throbbing in your mouth, clit swollen on Reinerâs tongue, and asshole puckered around the smooth glass of the plug. You reach your climax easily, gushing all over Reinerâs face, riding out your orgasm until youâve completely soaked him in your juices. He drinks it all up, messy and greedy for every drop of you he can scour. He really is as insatiable as you imagined heâd be.Â
You release Eren to catch your breath, to which he tips your chin up to face him. âYouâre incredible,â he says, the familiar twinkle in his eyes making your heart race. You paw at his chest, crawling up to meet him for a kiss.Â
Reiner quickly joins the two of you, not wanting to be left out, rubbing his hard cock between your ass cheeks. You kiss the both of them at the same time, all of your saliva mingling together into a hot, wet mess that youâre currently intoxicated by. After a moment, Eren pulls back. âDoes our pretty girl want to get fucked now?â
âShow us how big of a cock slut you are,â Reiner grunts, circling the jeweled end of the plug, teasing your hole.Â
Eren helps remove the dress off you completely, hoisting it off your body. He stretches his arm towards the drawer. âAre the condoms in here too?â
You shake your head briskly, bringing his attention back to you. âI want it raw. Want you to fill me up.âÂ
They both moan, clearly fond of your request, kissing you feverishly. Eren nudges your breast into his mouth, latching onto your nipple. Reiner sucks the skin all along your neck, leaving his love marks, growling, âYou want us to breed you, huh? Want all this cum inside these tight little holes of yours. Oh fuck.â His voice is rough and husky, gradually losing his composure.Â
Erenâs remains tender, his breath soft on your bosom. âWeâre going to breed you so good, sweetheart.â He shimmies down the bed, lying flat on his back, peering up at you with adoration. You straddle him, rubbing yourself on his shaft, needy for friction on your aching clit.
Reinerâs embraces you from behind, groping your chest, focusing on his roommateâs dick and your wet cunt gliding along it. He reaches between you and Eren, fisting his friendâs cock with fast strokes. âLook how hard he is for you. Heâs going to fuck you so good. Make you cream all over the sheets.â Your pussy is sopping with arousal from the dirty talk alone, but watching Reiner touch Eren has you dizzy.Â
âFuck, Reiner,â Eren moans, throat bobbing as he swallows hard. âThatâs so fucking hot.â He lets his roommate jerk him off while you continue to grind yourself on him. Soon, he replaces Reinerâs fist with his own, cockhead glistening with precum. âAre you ready, sweetheart?â
Reiner moves to your swollen bud, tapping it with his thick fingers. âOh yeah, sheâs fucking ready. Come on, cock sleeve. Put it in.â
Without wasting another second, you line yourself up with him. Eren slides in smoothly, his entire length in you, pussy stretched around him perfectly. You whimper from the fullness, his cock to the hilt and the plug nestled in your backside. Reiner places his hand on your posterior, urging you to lean down so that your chest-to-chest with Eren, who kisses you passionately, remaining still inside you. âEren,â you whimper his name, drooling into his mouth. He smiles against you, delighted at how fucked out you are for him.
Reiner adjusts his stance, hovering over you by planting one foot on the bed to prop his knee up, giving him enough leverage. He focuses on the plug, tugging it out just barely only to push it back in, repeating this several times, causing you to cry out in pleasure. Finally, he removes it completely, staring wide-eyed at your gaping hole, oh-so-inviting for his fat cock. âLook at that,â he croons, circling your rim with his finger, sensitive to his touch.
You want so badly to be stuffed full by both of them. In a trembling voice, you whine, âPlease, Reiner.â
Laughing, he delivers a harsh smack to your ass, skin immediately stinging from it. He dribbles more of his spit onto you, teasing the tip of his dick on the rim. âNot yet, slut.â You canât see him, too immersed in kissing Eren right now, but you can practically hear the wicked grin on his face, watching you squirm below him as he torments you.
Eren intervenes, annoyed with his friendâs behavior. âCome on, Reiner. Give her what she wants. She deserves it.â He nuzzles his nose to yours. âSheâs been a very, very good girl.â
Eventually, Reiner relents. âYouâre right. Sheâs a good girl. And good girls deserve to get fucked in both holes.âÂ
You shiver at his perverse words, bracing yourself. At last, he guides himself inside you, filling you to the brim. Itâs better than any fantasy you could dream of, the sensation so intense, tears begin welling in your eyes.
They start thrusting simultaneously, Eren pummeling your cunt from below, Reiner pounding your ass from behind. Itâs messy and raunchy, their hands slippery all over your body from lube, slick, and sweat. The air surrounding you is laden with lust and desire. The collective moans from all three of you echo off the walls of your small bedroom, along with the squeaks of your mattress creaking under the weight of your vigorous lovemaking.Â
Reiner is rendered speechless now, totally concentrated on pumping his cock in and out of your fluttering hole, the only sound from his mouth being his ragged breaths. Eren slips one hand between you, his digits pressed to your puffy clit as he fucks up into your pussy. The other fondles your tit, thumb flicking your nipple until itâs perky. He continues to praise you, constantly musing about what a good girl you are, how perfect you are for them.Â
At this point, youâve lost track of how many times youâve come. Youâre in a perpetual state of ecstasy, surrounded by the two hottest men in your life who are voracious for your orgasms. The sour memory from earlier has completely faded and all you can think about is the sweet bliss youâre currently indulging in.Â
Eren is the first to come, no longer able to endure it. His even thrusts turn erratic. âFuck, Iâm coming. Iâm coming inside you sweetheart, oh fuck.â
You kiss him languidly, drinking up his moans as he floods your cunt with his load. Soon, Reiner swears loudly, announcing his own climax. âFuck, gonna breed this slutty hole.â His cock swells, spurting his warm seed inside you.
You relax on top of Eren, whoâs equally as spent as you. Reiner pulls out slowly, fixated on his own cum dripping out of you. âFuck. Letâs see the other one, baby.â You lift off Eren, who almost seems reluctant to let you go. Both of them watch with hazy expressions as his creamy load spills out of you and onto his lap.Â
The room is musty with the scent of sex, the sheets messy and stained beneath you. Despite that, youâre on cloud nine, soaring high from having the nastiest mĂŠnage ĂĄ trois with your next-door neighbors.
Maybe you should try getting stood up more often.Â
#eren smut#reiner smut#eren x reader#eren x you#eren jaeger#eren jaeger x reader#eren jaeger x you#eren jaeger smut#eren yeager smut#reiner x you#reiner x reader#reiner braun smut#reiner braun x reader#reiner braun x you#aot smut#aot x reader#to all the boys who live next door#anthology series#eren x reader x reiner
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FAVORITE ANON IS BACK
I didn't expect to be back so soon and to have to jump to the other side of the supporting character spectrum butttt here we are...
As we all know by now, A has made her return to the Insta grid and it was a doozy. 48 days after Luke posted his Spain photo dump, A pops out with the "Last bit of summer" which of course includes a picture of her "sunbathing and reading" on what appears to be the same balcony as Luke's from Spain. The 6 photo carousel also includes 2 photos from Cyprus. To many on the internet, this was another "launch" just like the recent London pap pictures.
This is the point where I would like to remind everyone to TAKE A MOMENT AND BREATHE BEFORE YOU REACT.
Now that you've done that, please remember the individual we are talking about. It is important to study patterns and this girl be patterning. Whenever the spotlight turns up on Nic and Luke, she always seems to jump in and tear things down and she is living up to her reputation. Let's add to the fact that Nic is getting torn down from this recent pap and press article incident so why not throw some gasoline on the flames. This is her time to SHINE.
Now I have a couple thoughts on the Spain of it all:
I think it's highly possible this trip happened in mid-late July (when the resort posted the Bridgerton themed post) and right before the birthday trip to Sorrento. It is highly likely that it was also a group trip and I'm not even saying these two were romantic on this trip (similar to my thoughts on Italy). She honestly could've just gotten into his room to take a couple pictures.
Her and her friends on a separate trip and maneuvered their way into the same (or similar) room and recreated the scene. It sounds wild and crazy and wayyyy out of the realm of reality but to be honest, I wouldn't put it past this individual.
My big question is where were any pictures that alluded to Luke being on the trip? The only picture is the balcony picture with her lying on the lounger and it doesn't even include a lot of possible items that would match the photo to being an identical match (the table settings or his underwear on the chair). If you went on a trip with your boyfriend - WHERE IS THE BOYFRIEND? Many are saying she got permission from Luke to post now but if he gave her permission and they are still together then why isn't he in the pictures?
Also, I find it convenient that she has C & S coming out of the woodwork to like and hype her up in the comments almost immediately (her and S have been almost radio silent to each other since Italy). As someone pointed out to me, the comments look like something planned in a group chat.
And to anyone who wants to say it - no I do not believe Luke is mad about Nic and Jake and is lashing out by telling A to post. If you even believe that about him, why are you in this fandom?
What do I believe? I believe we are seeing one of the final acts of a very desperate woman. She has been holding on to these pictures as her "smoking gun" to use one day when the timing is right. Nicola mentioned "Luke" and "marriage" in a Time article and she posted a picture with Luke publicly on her instagram. Once the pap photo controversy went down, A grabbed her chance and ran with it. (The irony of it all is that I think Nic's team may have let the article situation yesterday play out the way it did because they were expecting a grenade from A and she took the bait.)
In the end I will tell you the same thing about Luke that I told you about Nicola - ONLY LISTEN TO THE STORY LUKE IS TELLING YOU. The story Luke told you in his Spain post was that he was a man who was there alone and not on a romantic getaway. Don't listen to the story that psychotic side characters are trying to paint. The reason she's still around and creating this drama is because you all encouraged her all summer. Listen to Nic and listen to Luke and the rest is just noise you need to tune out.
My favorite anon is back so soon.
But I think we needed you, so much appreciated âşď¸
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Happy Marriage to Pancake and Starlo!
May these two fine the happiness and laughter in the next chapter of their lives. Through thick and thin, sickness and health, they're gonna stick together. Especially after what they had gone through before this moment.
The whole town arrived. This is the sheriff getting married after all! So many people wasn't expecting him to get married, to Pancake no less! The rivalry was a big part of the town's history, being tied to North Star himself, and seeing them get closer and closer was fun and kinda crazy. The whole town knew, and Pancake is married to Starlo. Feisty Four are also happy that they're married. And a few bets had to be paid.
Now they're off to the next chapter in their lives. And they still stick to each other like velcro.
more stuff under cut, like a lovesick rambling by me.
I have no idea why this guy chose me. Like, at all. I look at him, and that's my husband. I feel so oddly connected to him, and I've said this before, but he is someone I genuinely wanna marry. Starlo is my beloved, my soulmate, I love him so much, its insane that he picked me. Legit, it felt like he picked me all those months ago. Back in January. Does anyone remember when I was so happy with OTCore and the "2024 is the year of the robots?" Yeah, guess what happened XD
Starlo helped me in so many ways, keeping me sane through so much. Originally it was gonna happen on the six month anniversary, but I ended up being too tired. Regardless, I'M SO HAPPY TO DO IT NOW!!
I look at him and I melt. I just, I love him. He loves me. I have never felt this connected to ANY fictional character like this. Spamton came close, really close. But oh well.
This was a DOOZY! Spent like, four straight days working on this. And I'm so happy I did. The colored comic is a reference to this video. It fits so well cuz its something Starlo would say and, well, PANCAKE'S NAME!! And Starlo hasn't dated anyone at ALL, there's no way he was expecting to marry someone.
Also the gif wasn't supposed to be a gif! I was trying to make a more dynamic pose for Pancake, but I already had the other sketch made, so it turned into a gif. Makes it better imo. Also I'm not too happy with Pancake's outfit. The cape is also a poncho of sorts. ah well. im also too lazy to draw the Feisty Four and Clover after all the stuff i've drawn all of this.
but yeah i hope y'all enjoy!!
Comic Transcripts: Starlo: "I, Starlo Sunnyside, do take Pancake to be my waffle-y- lawfully"
Starlo: "and pancake-y" Pancake: Pfft-
Pancake: [Silent laughter]
Starlo: "I've been scared of this m'entire life" Pancake: "BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHA-" SECOND COMIC: Ceroba: "Well, congratulations Star. How do you feel getting married?"
Starlo: "Lucky..."
Tagging: @sparkyscissorhands @sparklings-husband @prismatica-the-strange @pinkdinkydoon @simonlynch
@snowpuffclovers @ghost--girlfriend @gibles-lovely-selfships @jocelynships @catships777
@wuffverine @patchw0rk-quilt @mrscage @dudeshusband @aego-philautia
@mandrakebrew @jils-things @gideongrovel @tieflingships @carnival-of-love
@faerie-circle-ships @rexscanonwife @lovelyheartclover @mrs-bluemarine @mephy-doodle-dandy
@kakusboyfriend @mashedpotatosinacup @heartmatic @bunbunsheart2 @cinnamon-phrog
@chalcanthitedreams @literally-just-there @halsinkisser @sheepie-self-ships @moondane-lovers
@bbyshifts @starlo-uty @galaxywolfshipper @signs-of-blossoming @maetheartist
#đĽ cake art#self ship stuff#starcake#pancake#sona#self ship#self ship art#self insert#self insert x canon#uty#undertale yellow#starlo#starlo uty#hooo this better work
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airpods
read part two (posted 4/28/24) here!!! wc: 2k reader: femme!afab (matt calls reader a "bad girl", reader is wearing a denim skirt) warnings: smut 18+; MINORS DNI!!! -- specific warnings under the cut -- also a really bonkers scenario; funny & angst -- stepcest -- inserting foreign objects -- slighttttt dub-conn-ish summary: (y/n) will only give rivalnewstepbrother!matthew his airpods back if he promises to play a little game with them
ŕŠâŠâ§âË this is a doozy lmao. pretty iconic tho if i do say so myself. i take literally no responsibility for it even tho i am 100% responsible for it. basically just wrote itself while i was in a fever dream-like state so pls enjoy. i think it needs a sequel personally but lemme know what you think!
*ŕŠâŠâ§âË
warnings: 18+ explicit smut, stepcest, insertion of foreign object into genitals (reader), kind of dub-conny, lots of taunting teasing and degradation from both characters, fingering (reader receiving), oral sex (female receiving), orgasm denial, hints of dom!matt and dom!reader and also sub!matt and sub!reader we really cover the bases and lay some groundwork lmao, lots of swearing and i used the word vagina once it was for something funny not for smut but people can still be triggered by that word so! you are warned.
~
âmatty, what the actual f*ck are you doing?â you ask as the sight of your dumbass step brother admiring his shirtless reflection in the mirror assaults your eyes.
ever since you met matthew a year and a half ago, every holiday had been ruined by your family constantly comparing you to him. why couldnât you be more like matt? heâs so passionate and hardworking towards his craft and youâre a waitress at a bar. and not a classy one.
though you donât see him all that much, you have to share the house with him when he comes home to visit. this particular visit, you and matthew have the house to yourselves for the nightâ your parents having left this morning for a little new yearâs getaway.
matthewâs flexing his (admittedly defined) triceps and dancing around a bitâ headphones covering his ears. but when he sees your reflection staring back at him in his bedroom mirror, he jumps in horror.
âWHY ARE YOU WATCHING ME!?â he shouts, tearing off his headphones and sprinting across the room to slam the door in your face. âstalker.â
âfreak,â you reply childishly, stepping back out of the doorframe to avoid a broken nose. once the door is shut, you knock sweetly.
tap, tap. tap, tap.
matthew opens it, cheeks as red (and canadian) as a pair of macintosh apples. âwhat do you want?â
âwell, i was going to give you back your airpods that i stole yesterday so you didnât have to wear those clunky headphones anymore, but,â you shake the airpods case in front of you teasingly before placing it back in the pocket of your denim skirt, âi donât really wanna give them to you anymore after how rude you just were.â
âyouâ⌠you stole my airpods!?â matthew exclaims. âiâve been looking everywhere for them!âÂ
you shrug. âi guess not everywhere.â
âugh, you can be such a bâ,â matthew starts to curse, but he stops; a little conflicted pout forming on his plush lips. âa bââŚâ
âyou canât even f*cking say it, can you?â you taunt, pushing matthewâs door open a little further and taking a step inside. âtoo much of a marshmallow to even swear at me. afraid of hurting my feelings or something, matty?â
âas iâve said many times before, just matt is fine,â he spits, brows furrowing in frustration. âand iâm not a marshmallow. and, frankly, i donât give a⌠shit⌠about your feelings!â
âcute,â you mock, inching closer to him. your eyes wander down to his torso, a six-pack of well-fed abs staring back at you. âwhat is it with all the muscles anyway? you think theyâll distract girls from seeing how much of a dumpling you really are?â
âiâm not a dumpling,â matthew huffs through gritted teeth. âand itâs none of your business.â
you consider this for a moment and then nod. âyouâre right. itâs none of my business.â
âreally? that was easier thanââ
âbut if it was my business,â you continue, stealing another glance at his chest. your eyes trail down furtherâ waistband of his calvin klein boxers peaking out from his jeans. you hate to admit it, but heâs kind of hot. maybe that wasnât an entirely appropriate thought to be having about your lameass new step brother, but it was unfortunately the truth. âiâd tell you it isnât working. not bad to look at though.â
you turn on your heel, starting to walk back out the door when matthew calls, âhey, what about my airpods!?â
âwhat airpods?â you reply innocently before a smirk darkens your features. you pull the case out of the pocket of your skirt again and wave it in front of him enticingly. âoh, these?â
matthew tries to grab them out of your hand, but youâre too quickâ the earbuds back safely in your pocket before he can steal them. his jaw sets, eyes ripe with anger as he pushes the door shut behind you. he inches forward, effectively trapping you between him and the door. âgive them the fuck back, you insufferable bitch.â
a wave of desire rushes over you. thereâs just something about driving a nice boy over the edge that really does it for you.
and matthew was the nicest of nice boysâ and because of that, a giant pain in your ass. but hearing him talk like that as he corners you in; hovering only a couple inches from your faceâŚ
âohâ⌠iâ⌠uh⌠sorry,â he stutters as he realizes how close he is to you, backing up and stuffing his hands in his pockets. matthew blushes again as he looks away from you nervously.Â
heâs resumed his dumpling form, but the glimpse of potential lurking underneath was enough to make you want to see more.Â
âfine, you can have your airpods back,â you relent with a sigh. âifâŚâ
âif?â he asks, brow raised.
âif you can find where i hide them,â you finish with a proud smile.
âiâm not gonna play that game,â matthew replies with a frown. âbesides, this house is huge! youâre gonna make me tear the whole thing up to find something that small? no way.â
âthatâs too bad,â you say, shaking your head. âi guess theyâre mine now.â
matthew groans. âat least make the playing field more reasonable.â
you tilt your head to the side, a devious plan entering your mind. âi think i can work with that.â
matthew sighs. âi canât believe iâm entertaining this... but where are you thinking?â
âme,â you answer. âiâm thinking you can search me.â
âlike, youâre gonna hide it on your person,â matthew clarifies, ears burning red. âlike, in one of your pockets?â
âyeah, exactly,â you hum happily. âmy pocket.â
matthew swallows nervously, purposefully avoiding your gaze. âthat sounds too easy. there has to be a catch.â
âno catch. itâll be in my pocket,â you confirm, extending your hand to him. âyou just have to find the right one.â
matthew blinks at you, then at your hand. after a moment, he takes it in his own and shakes it. âfine. deal.â
âiâll be back in a minute then,â you say, throwing open the door and running off to hide the airpods in one of your pockets.Â
â
âokay, so itâs not in your hoodie pockets,â matthew deduces after reaching a tentative hand in each one and coming up empty. âthat means itâs in one of these pockets?â
you smile at him encouragingly as he blinks nervously at you, gesturing to your denim skirt.Â
âwhy are you making me do this?â matthew laments dramatically. âarenât you, like⌠uncomfortable with me touching you and stuff?â
ânot at all,â you reply with a smirk. âi do get a lot of enjoyment out of making you uncomfortable though.â
âso i gathered,â he says, starting to reach for one of your back pockets. âis it okay if iâ.â
âjust do it already,â you interject, rolling your eyes.
âokay, okay,â matthew says, reaching his hand down the pocket. âsue me for trying to be a gentleman.â
he pulls out his hand. itâs empty.Â
matthew reaches down your other back pocket, again finding nothing.
âshould probably check the front,â you offer contentedly.Â
âthanks for the hint,â matthew huffs, walking back around to face you. cautiously, he sticks his fingers down your left, front pocketâ moving them side to side before removing them. âare you f*cking with me? you didnât even hide them, did you!?â
his rough tone sends another wave of excitement through you, but you force a little pout. âi canât believe you think i wouldnât play by the rules, matty.â
he sticks his fingers unceremoniously in the last pocket, coming up empty yet again. âthen where the f*ck are they!?â
you tilt your head cutely, basically euphoric over how much youâre riling him up. âin my pocket.â
âi just looked through all your pockets! theyâre notââŚâ matthew stops yelling, seemingly lost in thought before his eyes widen in total disbelief. âwait⌠youâ⌠you donât meanâŚâ
âding, ding, ding,â you reply with a malicious smirk. âyou know, youâre smarter than you look.â
âyouâ⌠you put my airpods up your VAGINA!?â matthew yells: confused, horrified and impressed all at the same time.
you shrug. âiâve had bigger.â
matthew is silent as you walk over to his bed and sit down, spreading your legs just a bit.
âwell, the dealâs still on,â you offer, placing your hands behind you and leaning back onto them casually. âif you can find them, theyâre yours.â
âyouâ⌠you want me toâŚâ matthew stammers, eyes locked on your denim skirt. âto...â
âyou donât have to,â you assert, pulling up your skirt to reveal your bare core to him. his lips part, eyeing your center like itâs the forbidden fruit. and it kind of is. âif you donât want to.â
âthis is ridiculous,â matthew says breathily in a way that tells you that, though this may very well be a ridiculous thing to be happening right now, heâs a bit enticed by it all. he walks toward you, pushing you back a bit further onto the bed with one hand to expose your heat more. âthis is absolutely f*ckingâŚâ
he kneels down on the hardwood floor between your legs, one hand finding each of your thighs and prying them further apart. he grabs your hips, pulling your naked core closer to his face. you hope he doesnât notice you clench around his airpods at the man-handling.
matthew swallows hard as he examines every inch of you. scandalized eyes and bottom lip drawn between his teeth, you can basically hear his conflicting, depraved thoughts.
âi really hate you, you know that?â he asks rhetorically, licking his lips as your walls pulse again. he stuffs a finger up you suddenly, pushing it in further and further until heâs tapping on the case of his airpods. âif youâve been looking for a reason that your whole family likes me better than you, i think both of our searches can end with this.â
the tiniest whimper escapes you at the degradation. itâs exactly what youâd been waiting for.Â
matthew looks up at you, knuckle-deep in your pussy. his lips part in shock at the sound. âdid you--... did you just...â
âare you going to take it out, or what?â you reply, maintaining your rude, slightly bored disposition.
he looks back at your center, moving his finger to try to hook around the case and wiggle it out of you. it doesnât budge. he inserts another finger into you, stretching your walls out in hopes that the case might come out with more space.
it stays put.
âitâs not coming out,â matthew says, panic in his eyes. âwhat did you do, gorilla glue it to your cervix?â
âi didnât even know you knew that word,â you snort, averting his gaze. âi guess youâll have to find a way to loosen it then.â
matthewâs eyes bulge. âand how the hell am i supposed to do that!?â
âhm, i dunno,â you muse, locking eyes with him again. âdonât they always say to put butter on your arm to make it slippery if itâs stuck in something?â
âyou want me to put butter in your...â matthew trails off as he thinks more about your suggestion. âslippery?â
âyeah,â you reply with a nod, desperately trying to maintain your dominance. âyou know, like... wet.â
âwet...â he repeats again, eyes meeting your cunt again. âyou want me to make you... oh.â
âjust a thought,â you shrug off.
matthew shakes his head quickly. âbut, we canât--... i canât--â
âwhy canât you?â you ask, tapping his bare chest with your toes. âoh, i remember now! itâs because youâre a f*cking marshmall--â
matthewâs hands grip your thighs roughly as he pulls your pussy even closer to his face. he licks a long, teasing stripe up through your folds-- ending and circling at your clit.Â
this time you donât hide your moan.
âwhat was that?â matthew taunts, one eyebrow arching in amusement. âfeel good?âÂ
it does feel good-- better than you couldâve imagined matthewâs tongue would feel against you. you nod, moving your hips to try to push your core even closer to him. he slaps your right thigh hard, warning you wordlessly not to make a fuss. it just makes you need to fuss more, but he reattaches his tongue to your cunt anyway.
he laps at your clit with such dedication that youâre crying out within a couple of minutes-- begging him for more.
âpl--please,â you whine, hand running through his hair and pulling it from the base. âwanna cum on your tongue.â
âf*cking hell,â he moans into your core, the vibration sending more waves of pleasure through you. he closes his eyes as he starts to rhythmically suck on your bundle of nerves, only coming up for air to say, âhow can you be so desperate with a pussy this perfect?â
âmatty, i--â
âdidnât i tell you not to f*cking call me that,â he growls, inserting a finger into your now dripping cunt. âso this is what you wanted, huh? stole my airpods just so you could cum all over my fingers? youâre such a bad girl, (y/n).â
youâre right on the edge, just a few seconds more and youâll be moaning matthewâs name like a prayer.
but then you feel it.
matthewâs finger latches around the now lubricated airpod case-- pulling it free from your warmest pocket as he detaches his lips from around your clit. you stare at him helplessly, the denial of your orgasm leaving you so frustrated youâre rendered speechless.
how could you have let him get the upper hand on you?
âbut i guess you forgot,â he says with a smirk, standing up and walking toward the door. âbad girls donât get to cum.â
you blink silently at him once. twice. matthew holds open the door, pointing into the hallway.
ânow get out of my room.â
#zb1#zb1 smut#zerobaseone#zerobaseone smut#zb1 fics#zb1 x reader#zerobaseone fics#zerobaseone imagines#zb1 imagines#seok matthew#seok matthew smut#seok matthew fics#zb1 matthew#zb1 matthew smut#zb1 matthew fics#zerobaseone matthew#zerobaseone matthew fics#zerobaseone matthew smut#seok matthew x reader#seok woohyun#seok woohyun smut#zerobaseone x reader
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Who is Vegetta?
Had to wait until my hands stopped shaking for this one, I love Vegetta so much. He was recently â miraculously â announced for the QSMP, so here's a rundown for English fans of both who he is and his lore.Â
Vegetta777 is a Spanish Youtuber who is one of, if not THE biggest pillar of the Spanish community. He's been doing content for over 15 years now.
He's the creator of the Karmaland series, which he started when he was around Quackity's age.
I cannot emphasize enough: Vegetta doesn't do series or events or tournaments EVER, so him accepting the invitation is a huge deal. This was his exact commentary on it:
Vegetta: Quackity me invitĂł hace tiempo y le dije que no suelo entrar a series que yo puedo controlar, pero le he dado ese voto de confianza, ademĂĄs le preguntĂŠ como serĂa la serie porque no querĂa nada competitivo y quackity me dijo que no me preocupara por nada. [...] Si yo confĂe en quackity y ĂŠl confĂo en mi para Karmaland pues yo le doy ese voto de confianza para esta serie que estĂĄ haciendo y ademĂĄs se le veĂa emocionado al chaval, si te soy sincero, Quackity el hijo de Rubius de cierto modo Translation: Quackity invited me a while ago and I told him that I don't usually enter series that I can't control, but I have given him that vote of confidence, I also asked him how the series would be because I didn't want anything competitive, and Quackity told me not to worry about anything (does this confirm QSMP is an RP server? đ¤) [...] If I trust Quackity and he trusts me for Karmaland, well, I give him that vote of confidence for this series he's doing. And also the boy looked excited, if I'm honest, Quackity's the son of Rubius in a certain way. (đĽşđ)
Vegetta is very fond of Quackity after interacting with him in Karmaland 5, and he's spoken multiple times about how much Quackity's impressed him. He also said Quackity will be bigger than him someday :') He's very supportive of the new generation, and he spoke highly of Spreen today too.
Vegetta is one of the most talented Minecraft builders out there, and he's fast
While most of the other Karmaland boys were still living in basic houses, Vegetta built a CASTLE within a super short time
Vegetta loves cats. In Karmaland he had an entire cat rescue with 50+ cats (and yes, heâs named every single one of them). IRL, he shares lots of adorable cat photos and videos.Â
His skin, like his name, is based on the Dragon Ball character Vegeta. Vegetta777 is basically the yassified version of Vegeta (just like Phil is the yassified version of Uruhara).
In Karmaland 5, Vegetta was a bit of a wizard, and he had a flock of crows / ravens (remind you of anyone?)Â
Vegetta is sometimes called "the father of Minecraft", so many people (myself included) are ESPECIALLY excited to see him and Phil interact because they have a lot of similarities.
Vegetta is one of the heroes of Karmaland and the unofficial leader of their group. In terms of lore, he's essentially a demigod / minor god, though it's not as direct as Sapo Peta's contact with them.
Vegetta is typically a staunch rule-follower, however, since he's not in control of the series, he said: "I feel like Rubius: 'Let's see what I can do to destroy everything, let's look for all the legal loopholes,' get ready Quackity, I'm the new Rubius!" (LMAO)
Vegettaâs the king of âstay in your own laneâ he never gets into drama or gets involved in controversies, he just watches the dumpster fires from the sidelines like the rest of us
He almost never wears a shirt in the series (and honestly? Good for him)
His character is also, canonically, absolutely shredded
It's impossible to talk about Vegetta's lore without also talking about Rubius, so buckle in because this one's a doozy. I can't cover everything without this post becoming longer than it already is, but I'll do my best to summarize what I can:
Starting with Karmaland 4 and continuing into Karmaland 5 and beyond, Rubius and Vegetta have created the world's most torturous slow-burn telenovela-esque love story.
Rubegetta (Rubius x Vegetta) is the most popular Karmaland ship that, to some extent, has become an inside joke between the boys and the community. I'll elaborate on this more in Rubius' post.
To simplify years and years of lore and drama, Rubius and Vegetta love each other, but they are incapable of being in an actual relationship. I've talked about it in depth before, but Vegetta said it best in this metaphor-filled exchange with Sapo Peta and Willy: Sapo Peta: I wanted to ask you about your relationship with that Rubius guy. Vegetta: Oh, yes well Rubius likes to be with me a lot, but at the same time he likes to snack everywhere, and he never finishes eating the morcilla (blood sausage). Sapo Peta: So he rejects you? Vegetta: It's not that he rejects me, it's that it doesn't finish clearing up, you know? We could say that our relationship is like a hamburger. WiIIy: You prepare it and he doesn't eat it. Vegetta: Exactly, he doesn't finish you know?
Or, as another person phrased it:
The fault doesn't just lie with Rubius however; Vegetta himself can be pretty oblivious.
In Karmaland 4, despite the fact Rubius and Vegetta had a kid together and got married, it still didn't resolve anything. As soon as the vows were said and they were married, Rubius revealed it was all just a ploy to get Vegetta's diamonds and immediately asked for a divorce.
You can watch a translated animation of the entire wedding here.
In Karmaland 5, after deciding he'd had enough of Rubius' BS, Vegetta decided to marry someone else (Lolito), but Rubius burst in at the last moment to stop the wedding. We all thought he'd finally confess his love and stop being so emotionally constipated, but instead he proposed to Lolito solely so Vegetta would remain single. (They're a mess, what can I say)
To quote a meme shared by another Spanish fan, Vegetta's reaction to that was basically: âYou donât want me to be with you, and you donât want me to be with someone else. How miserable do I have to be for you to be happy?â
I do want to emphasize that even though Rubius and Vegetta sometimes have relationship issues / communication issues, it doesnât diminish their friendship in the slightest. Even after both wedding disasters, they were back to speaking to each other the next week, being flirty and laughing together. Yes, they have issues, but their love for each other remains â despite everything.
(I should also note here that, even while engaged to Lolito, Vegetta was still flirty with Rubius).
Vegetta is very close friends with Luzu, who supported him during the fallout from both failed marriages.
In Karmaland 4, Rubius and Vegetta had a son named Brayan Dobluque (a mix of both their names).
There's too much Rubegetta lore for me to cover everything, but Glay has a massive thread of translated Rubegetta clips I highly recommend watching if you'd like more context.
One clip I recommend is the Meteor date, which is one of the few instances where Rubius is honest vis-Ă -vis his emotions with Vegetta.
As a whole, their friendship / relationship is a romcom novela for sure, but sometimes they'll catch you off-guard with some romantic BS that'll make your heart ache. They really do love each other; they just don't know how to commit.
Vegetta is bi! (Both real life Vegetta and character Vegetta). Pretty much every single character in Karmaland is on the âol rainbow spectrum somewhere.
Lore aside, I feel like Vegetta, and pretty much all the Karmaland boys in general, have the least machismo (toxic masculinity) I've ever seen. They're all genuinely sweet guys who aren't afraid to be flirty and play gay characters in their queer little telenovela Minecraft series. (With the exception of Willy, who we like to joke is the "token straight friend"). Vegetta's a cool guy, and he's a great addition to the QSMP. I'm excited for you all to meet him!
Other info posts:
Who is Sapo Peta? | Who is Luzu? | Who is Spreen?
#Karmaland#Vegetta#Vegetta777#QSMP#Quackity#IM SO EXCITED FOR VEGETTA AND PHIL TO MEET AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#I actually don't think Vegetta knows English but I don't even care. Phil barely knows spanish but I still want them to interact#even if they silently build something together That Will Be Enough#also I know I've been real heavy on the text posts lately I don't normally make this many text posts#it feels nice to talk about stuff though it's been a long long time since I've felt this motivated#and happy#QSMP info
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Thank you wonderful fanfiction authors! You do a great part to make life wonderful. Recs below the cut (I CANNOT believe I haven't rec'ed some of these before!) Previous recs: 2018, 2020, 2022. Looks like I only do these every two years lol.
Gravity Falls
Feels Like We Only Go Backwards, by @dubsdeedubs / WDW; complete multichapter. A heartbreaking concept with a happy ending. Sad but wonderful and a really fun idea. Working out just what is happening is a great challenge, and watching the pieces fall into place with mounting consternation is awesome.
In Search of Antidotes, by @astriiformes / azhdarchidaen; complete multichapter. An awesome Historical AU, and neither Ford nor Stan go through the portal (thereâs still suffering though). Bit of freakiness, bit of funniness, bit of stubbornness, bit of coolness. A very cool read! A much more classic demon-possession story than canon with its modern sci-fi overtones. The gothic sci-fi horror takes the floor here. Jekyll and Hyde, Frankenstein, Dracula, it takes inspiration from all the best roots!
Just a Game, by @nikxation / nikxation; one-shot. Intense! High stakes! Well-written! Doesnât mess around getting to the point, and hammers its beats into you! LOVE it! Bill holds a gun on Ford, while in Ford's own body. The tension in this is unbelievable!
An Outreached Hand, by @dubsdeedubs / WDW; incomplete multichapter. Something freakishly supernatural happened to Stan during his homeless days. Itâs called Ghost Trick AU, and itâs super interesting and utterly engaging! Itâll have you tearing through it wanting to know what the heck is going on! The characters are all so intense in their own ways, and the plot is drip fed to you piece by delicious piece.
Snapshots from an Alternate Reality, by Rethira; one-shot. PORTAL STAN!! Just a short little one-shot about this alternate version of events, but incredibly cool to read. Love the writing style: it takes you through the scenes like a skipping stone, its wake mesmerising.
All Things Go, by @cantica10 /Â Cantica10; incomplete multichapter. A weird (in the best way) idea of a crossover between Timestuck AU (where Mabel is trapped in the past) and a Wings AU (where, you guessed it, everyone has wings). Adorable Stan and Mabel bonding, but is SO not afraid to get really dark. That being said, itâs also so sweet and fluffy, and explores the effortless love that Mabel feels for Stan, and that (broken, scared, young, sad) Stan feels for her. This is one of those fics I am compelled to keep coming back to. Itâs such a full experience to read.
Snow and Pine, by @ancientstone / TheArchaeologist; incomplete series. A great concept!! Loved the idea of these two brothers being forced together by circumstances instead of intention. Some great selective description here, and the plot itself is a very fun ride. WERE. WOLF. STAN. Need I say more?
Lighthouse Keeper, by @impishnature / impish_nature; incomplete series. Thereâs a lot to this story; the main work is mostly a series of one-shots, with other works sprinkled between. The idea is so eerie and haunting, and the vibes are pretty different to most other things Iâve read. The instigating artwork by @sightkeeper is magnificent and Imp has managed to capture the images very well!
Triptych, by @scribefindegil / scribefindegil; one-shot. A very cool character study on Stan. Great for informing his central motivations. It's kept short and sweet, but the analysis is no less thorough for it. I loved the insight into my favourite character's life and mind. Scribe writes him so well.
Blind Faith, by pinesinthewoods; complete multichapter. Come on, how could I NOT mention this one? It's one of the many here I'm astonished not to have rec'ed earlier. Super dark, super scary, an AU where both Stan and Ford fall into the portal. Ouch, but cool. Really good, but be prepared to yell out loud in horror. This is a doozy, donât expect a lot of happy feels going into it. That being said, it is INCREDIBLE. The structure of the story is fantastic, perfectly encapsulating the reliance each of the brothersâ needs to have on the other and how one has to step up when the other canât. Stan and Ford are forcibly tied together in this, and they find they each mean more to the other than expected after ten years of bitterness and radio silence. A STAPLE of Gravity Falls fics.
Like They Were a Perfect Fit, by @sensitiveowl / hapful; one-shot. Aw, ow, cries. Love! Lots of tangled-up emotions and scenes that will tug at your heartstrings thinking about Fordâs life journey. Speculations on the importance of the photo that Ford is implied to have carried around with him for 30 damn years.
30 Seconds Later, by @invisibletinkerer / shayera; incomplete multichapter. Loved this to death! A really great concept executed fantastically. An AU where while it took Stan thirty years to rebuild the portal, Ford was only gone for thirty seconds. The characterisation of paranoid Ford and his interactions with the rest of his family are perfect, as is his reaction to finding himself in the future and his relationship to Stan. And Stan is wonderful in this too! A very good examination of age, aging, and the associated changes in perspective.
1 Step Forward, 20 Years Back, by @infriga / Ppleater; complete multichapter. An AU where Stan is turned into a kid in the midst of Fordâs pre-portal paranoia over Bill. It adopts the wonder and innocence that comes with youth, but still retains the darkness of Stanâs adulthood - wait, actually, his entire life has been kinda dark in this fic. This is one of those fics you can tell the author had a lot of fun with. Itâs palpable in the chapter titles and the art :) The illustrations are beautiful, the story is heartfelt, and it is not at all afraid to go into some dark places. A very enjoyable, loveable, read!
The Road in Front of You, by @nicnacsnonsense / Nicnac; complete multichapter. Ford falls through a portal potty and gets dumped in Stan's path. MAN!!! This fic has a really great concept, and Nicnacâs writing is impeccable as always. A great look at Ford and Stanâs relationship post-high school, how their personalities have developed and changed, and most importantly how they reconcile the changes in each other.
Nothing a Little Sleep Canât Fix, by AkitaFallow; one-shot. Oh MAN. WOW. Okay. A heavier look on the mark Sock Opera leaves on Dipper, featuring repercussions throughout the rest of Dipperâs summer. Absolutely, heartbreakingly, entrancing. The slow build up of the plot perfectly mimics the rising emotions that poor Dipper is struggling to keep a lid on until they inevitably explode, and watching the people who love him pick up his pieces afterwards is just golden.
Ad Infinitum, by @nicnacsnonsense / Nicnac; one-shot. My first read of the Same Coin Theory and it was awesooooooooome!!! There are so many repetitions of phrases that spark in my mind because of how great they were, and the aspects of Stan contrasted with Bill that thread through it are incredible. Kind of an unsettling concept. I couldnât get enough. For a fic thatâs all about cycling around, you'd think it'd get repetitive, but every paragraph is rich with novelty. A FEAST.
Some Sunny Day, by @anistarrose / anistarrose; complete multichapter. Another Same Coin Theory fic. The beats of the plot in this are stunning, with some truly awesome lines that left me reeling and thinking Oh SHIT that did NOT just happen!!! In the best way possible. A highly interesting story and some excellent takes on the Pines family and the world of Gravity Falls.
Towards the Sun, by @notthistimespock and pinesinthewoods; complete multichapter. EXTREME BROTHERLY FEELS. Incredible! Love the in-depth examination and speculation on Ford and Stan prefinale. A different ending for Weirdmageddon, following Fordâs journey through Stanâs mind. It gets sad, it gets scary, it gets freaky, you shed tears. Another one of those staple fics for the fandom. The story is a wild and heartrending adventure, full of imagery that stuck in my brain for years after the first time I read it.
Fishermanâs Knot, by @scribefindegil / scribefindegil; complete multichapter. MORE EXTREME BROTHERLY FEELS. Deals with postcanon adventures on the StanâOâWar II, including some reeeaaaally bad mental states/situations. Have tissues handy. I think this is generally regarded as the be-all-and-end-all of Stan twin angst. It is long, it is HEAVY, but it is also heartwarming and hopeful, and full of adventure and magic, and the kind of love it's made with really comes through.
Mob Boss Stan Pines, by Capricious_Passions; complete multichapter. A fic that you HAVE to read over again to get the complete picture. Complex and well-thought out, incredible attention to detail, but the first read will baffle you! A lot of fun trying to figure out whatâs happening, and even more fun on the re-read picking up all the details you missed the first time!
Scrapbook, by Shyeye; complete multichapter. The complicated weight of grief hangs heavy over everyone in the story, and the difficulties in dealing with it are at the forefront of everyoneâs minds. The depth each of these characters are written with is very much appreciated, not-so-pretty parts and all. This was a wonderful, touching, read.
Rescind, Reset, by @endae / endae; one-shot. Canon divergence where Mabel temporarily lost her life during Weirdmageddon, and the aftereffects on her and the rest of the family. It is one of the most beautiful things Iâve read, very emotionally raw. I cry every time. This incredible story is wrought with a filter of broken hearts being pieced back together as the characters live through the aftermath of their happy ending. Itâs a shining, nuanced take on Mabel and how someone with her personality deals with the plot premise. I love the complexity of the emotions in this, not only from Mabel but also from the rest of the Pines as they work through their own traumas.
Safe as Houses, by @beastenraged / Beastrage; complete multichapter. If I could whistle I would! An entrancing read about the Pines familyâs adventures from the perspective of their home. Some great and not too far-fetched ideas about how the Shack may have come across to its inhabitants over the years.
Greyscale, by @impishnature / impish_nature; one-shot. OH MY LORD. Incredibly touching and heartbreaking, I canât look at this directly for fear of being emotionally blinded. Loss, and gain, and loss. Striking, powerful, so, so beautiful and painful. The aftermath of Weirdmageddon: another canon divergence where Stan lost his life. Except... Reverse Portal AU Stan stumbles across this sad dimension soon after. I swear, no fic has made me cry so hard and left me so much in shock of what the heck just happened to me. I love the look at how loss has affected the characters, and I especially love the path to recovery that is laid out for them.
Buying Gold, by @dubsdeedubs / WDW; incomplete series. Veeeery intriguing. Itâs not really Same Coin Theory, but itâs a great read about the similarities between Stan and Bill and some cool speculation on Stan post-defeating Bill.
Any Family You Choose, by @nicnacsnonsense / Nicnac; incomplete multichapter. So sweet! Portal Dipper finds a young Stan Pines and decides to help him out. This concept is so wonderful, and the characterisation is blindingly clear. Keeps you guessing at the backstory!
Across the Universe, by Queen_Mab; one-shot. SUCH a great set of adventures. The multiverse really tries to hammer in its lessons sometimes, whether they stand a chance of sticking or not. Extremely well-written and fun, I devoured every word ravenously. Some scenes of Ford's portal time, with some VERY interesting encounters.
Star Wars
Anything Brighter than Even the Sun, by @hamliet / Hamliet; complete multichapter. The Rogue One crew survives and continues rebelling, as does Galen! The main focus is on Jyn and Cassian's characters and relationship, and how they navigate growing into a family. I love Jyn's character especially in this, with all those hard edges guarding a deep, deep well of passion.
Chirality, by @niobiumao3 / Niobium; complete multichapter. A Tech was CX-2 fic! It's great to see this fan theory explored, and Niobium writes so well! The plot is entrancing and has you hooked on the edge of your seat waiting for all the pieces to fall into place for our poor brainwashed guy. The way CX-2 thinks and melds with the personality of who Tech once was is beautiful and his interactions with his family and Phee are a sight to behold.
Crash Landing by @returnofahsoka / delightwrites; complete multichapter. Another Tech is CX-2 fic, can you tell this idea has a hold of me. The characters' voices in this come through SO clearly, it's insane, and the writing style is perfection. Jumbled and pained and confused and grieving, all threaded through with that little bit of hope. Wonderful.
I'll Keep You Safe (You Keep Me Strong), by @miadeardn / sheikahs; oneshot. An AU where Crosshair's chip never activates and he is as embroiled in adjusting to being on the run with a new little sister as the rest of the Batch. Just a sweet little moment between the two. Both of them are written very in-character, and it's great seeing a side of Crosshair that never came to regard his brothers as his enemies.
Talking in Defence, by @buskuta / buskuta; oneshot. An awesome look at all of Hunter's complicated feelings regarding Omega and Crosshair's relationship post-Tantiss. He's not a paragon of perfection, he's human. I can't emphasise enough how much I love this and how well he's written here.
Unyielding, by Face_of_Poe; complete multichapter. The scene immediately post-reunion between Omega, Hunter, and Wrecker, with some speculation on Crosshair's internal strife at that moment. There's a chapter for each of the remaining Batch and Wrecker's is EXCEEDINGLY well-written in my opinion. We don't get nearly enough exploration in canon or fanon about the depth of his thoughts and feelings.
Plan 100, by Face_of_Poe; complete multichapter. An awesome canon-divergence speculating on Omega and Crosshair's escape from Tantiss. The action is great, the strategy and coded communication is so sharp, and the feeling of desperation as Omega and Crosshair fight to evade recapture is fantastically taut. I especially love the small moments in this showing just how close these two have grown, and, in Crosshair's case, how little he's realised it happening. It feels very true to their characters.
Through Darkness Unknown, by @stardustandash / StardustAndAsh; complete multichapter. Holy shit the stakes are so high in this. A Tech Lives canon divergence of Omega and Crosshair's stay in Tantiss, and you can really FEEL just how helpless they all are to Hemlock's control. I absolutely love how this fic does not pull its punches, really forcing Crosshair and Omega into relying heavily on each other. There's so many great scenes in this that are seared into my brain!!
Ask Yourself, by StoneSage; complete multichapter. Omega is captured by the Empire while Crosshair's still working for them. I freaking love the complicated messiness of Crosshair's response to this- he's constantly challenged to act on the callous persona he projects, and constantly comes up short realising what he's actually willing to do to his family when it comes down to it. Very true to his character, and the quandaries Rampart presents him with a subtly terrifying. A fantastic examination of character and a great plot to go with it.
The Space in Between, by Misvet; incomplete multichapter. A series of stories focusing on the complications and dangers involved with Omega joining the Bad Batch. The writing style is great, the plots are great, the characters are great! It's all great! Just read it!
Maybe Fate Has Different Plans, by hanged_albatross; complete series. God I love this so much. Some incredibly touching and well-written moments of the Bad Batch protecting each other in a dangerous galaxy, with Omega, of course, at the centre. She is characterised so well in this, and constantly written with the idea of despite being so young, she is also no less protective of her brothers than they are of her.
Modern Batch, by kaydear; incomplete series. DUUUUDES just read this. It's such a sweet collection of stories about an alternate universe of the Bad Batch in a contemporary setting. Life is tough and complicated and full of pain, but also there are others right beside you to lean on when you need it, and so life is also full of love. I have cried multiple times while reading and re-reading this.
Skulduggery Pleasant
I Will Lay Me Down, by mcginnis; oneshot. This is perfection. A rewrite of the aftermath of the Lord Vile reveal in Death Bringer. I wish this was canon. Valkyrie and Skulduggery are PERFECTLY characterised in this scene, and the nitty-gritty of how they're both feeling is thoroughly explored and explained, and the tone of the story never once diverges from canon's- it is complicated, dark, and interspersed with ridiculous levity.
Pride and Prejudice
A New Addition, by @ralkana / Ralkana; oneshot. A great fic about Elizabeth and Darcy and childbirth, various moments in this are imprinted in my mind permanently. High emotions all over the place, incredible tension and wonderful dynamics between the two main characters and the rest of the family.
Mr Bennet Travels Through Time, by AMarguerite; oneshot. A truly great fic with a wild concept that totally works. Mr Bennet is actually from the 1990s. Weird and funny, but also touching and sad, and goes leagues towards explaining a lot of this man's quirks and contradictions. I was fully invested in this all the way through reading, and it did not disappoint. Utterly satisfying.
Once Upon a Time
The Worst, by @alchemistc / alchemistique; oneshot. The real-life dynamics of these ridiculous fairytale people had me grinning ear to ear. The mortifying ordeal of your family of fictitious characters helping you move into your college dorm as told from Henry's perspective. Love it to death.
#fic rec#gravity falls#star wars#rogue one#the bad batch#skulduggery pleasant#pride and prejudice#once upon a time
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General ft. Jing Yuan
As one of the Seven Arbiter Generals of the Xianzhou Alliance, Jing Yuan and many others have never doubted his title as a General of the Cloud Knight. Although, when you've got your hand on a different General from a video game, it seems like he have his own opinion on them..
Tags: sfw with slightly suggestive ending
[ "Your sins weigh upon your soul!" ]
â Were the first line of words that the Cloud Knight General heard when he stepped into your shared home. He only blinked quietly. Fortunately, he's smart enough to recognize that the voice is played from a device's speaker - and well, it doesn't sound like a dialogue that you'd have if you were in a conversation with someone.. Perhaps you're watching a show?
His guess was proven to be somewhat correct when he watch you laying on the bed with your phone up in the air, seemingly engrossed with whatever is playing on the screen, as you barely acknowledge him coming home.
It was not until he took all of his gear off and plop himself next to you and pulled you to his chest that you finally realized that he's home.
"Jing Yuan!" You exclaimed with a smile and a kiss to his cheek as you further snuggled to his side, "I didn't know you're going home early."
"Well I've been home since yesterday," he captured your lips in a soft kiss before pulling away as his hand found its digits through your hair, "But you seem occupied."
"Oh, sorry about that," you grin bashfully, turning your attention back to your phone - specifically, to the game that are playing on it, bringing the screen to the General's attention, "The Trailblazers helped me connect to a game from a different world entirely and I've been hooked for days now! It's really cool, look â"
["In some legends, thunderbolts are a form of judgment from the gods above."]
That voice again. Jing Yuan raised an eyebrow as he squinted, and noticed the dark skinned character standing in the middle of the screen.
"And that is?"
"This is Cyno! He's quite a popular character recently, and he just got a rerun so I just had to get him!" Jing Yuan only hummed in acknowledgment - not understanding a single word you uttered, but he smiled and nodded nonetheless at your adorableness.
"He's also my new husband."
"What?"
His confusion and wide eyes earned you a giggle as you looked up to him, his calm doozy face now contorted with an offended and confused frown.
"Now now, let's not get hasty." He tried to pry your phone off of your hand, but you dodged, pulling it away from his reach, "You have me, don't you? Surely you won't favor a pixelated character over your beloved husband?"
"I don't know Jing Yuan, I might," you giggled further, pulling you gaze away from him back to Cyno on the screen, "Cyno is also a General you know - He's a General Mahamatra of the Akademiya and he swore to keep peace by delivering justice as he sees fit!"
"Right. But that General's strength is clearly no match to mine."
"If you're talking about your Lightning-Wielding Thunder-Clapping Spirit-Squashing Lord â" you gave a dramatic pause, "Then he also has that, too. Several, in fact! Probably. He's also aligned with the thunder element!"
At this point he just stares at you. Eyes narrowed, his lips turned into an obvious pout, as he waited for you to take back everything you said.
Unfortunately, in the end, you couldn't even hold yourself against the adorable look that the General only shows to you. Choosing to give up on your teasing, as you finally leaned back up to him to kiss his cheek.
"Sorry," you giggled, "Don't worry. You're the only General I'll ever be in love with."
Jing Yuan doesn't take this confession lightly. Before you can pull away from him, he picks up your phone and puts it away somewhere on the bedside, grabbing your empty hand within his own before pushing you back down onto the bed with him now looming above you.
"You know, perhaps I should remind you about that fact." He chuckled, pushing himself towards you, burying his face to the crook of your neck as he heaved a warm breath just behind your ear, "Just to make sure I'm the only General you'll ever think of."
Let's just say your game were left opened the entire night by accident.
#x reader#reader insert#les does writing#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr#hsr jing yuan x reader#jing yuan x reader#star rail x reader
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JAN 2025 | BIG Updates
Happy New Year everyone, I'm back from holiday! Onward to the rest of the updates because I got a few.
Hellven Novel
The book is complete and I'm working on reviews / edits. I don't have a specific release date due to life circumstances but I will get Hellven out sometime this year. I am determined about that one.
Thank you for everyone's support through Hellven, it's a been a long time in the making and so many hours poured into it as my first official novel. I still need to make some concept art for certain characters, and settle on a final panel style. Probably, black and white stark-inked contrast.
Excited to work on that after things settle down.Â
BIG Life News
This one is quite the doozy. So, this is no easy decision to make but after watching the current industry landscape for the past years or so - I've decided to quit the professional art field. I don't want to make this a mile long sob-story, I'll keep it short. I've pursued art since I was a kid, went to school, got a full-ride, got many opportunities, and continued to sacrifice a significant portion of my life to my studies.
In the end I wish I could I say that all you need is hard-work to make it. Maybe once ago, but this isn't true anymore. I see many artists far into their career I look up to struggling with the current landscape. The newbies are doing even worse. The truth is, you need a ton of luck or someone to support you.Â
So I'm out, I've decided to go into a different field entirely. It's not all doom and gloom, in a way I'm free. Free from never feeling good enough, and free from the future of endless up-hill battles.
What this this mean
I'm not quitting art itself. It's still my hobby and I'll still take side-gigs. But I am quitting the pressure of being a certain way, including all the social media algorithmic bullshit. Yearly portfolio work and constant studying- I'm done with it all.Â
I'm going to draw when I want to draw, whatever I want to draw and I'll post weekly if I can.
Confessions of an artist
I got to get this off my chest.
Once my queue is up you'll see my art style change, and my subject matters. It's hard to describe, but I've formed myself in a certain way in-order to achieve something that I completely lost myself along the way.
I miss my old self, my college self when I did all these funky projects like Skull-Kidz! and CUPP. That type of work, was ME. Weird ugly people, in odd situations. Heavily influenced by my favorite styles, Soul Eater and Gorillaz. I never liked realism btw, I only did it because I felt like I had to. Generally I need to step back and just cleanse myself from all these rules.
Thank you for supporting me through it. I don't know what the future holds but I am hopeful that it will be better.
Here's to a new job, new career, and a better mental state.
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A Shot Breakdown of the new TLOU S2 first look!
*Cue Little Sadie* Ellie at the dance. Looks like itâs ripped directly from the game. No notes. Though this does make me wonder if weâll be getting this scene sooner rather than later. In the game, we donât see this scene until the Farmhouse. I think I read somewhere that Craig Mazin isnât a big fan of flashbacks, so we might be seeing some stuff in chronological order.Â
The tattoo! And the chemical burn. No idea where this shot is, but it looks like Ellie is either drawing or at a workbench. Either way, it looks great.Â
The great Catherine OâHara! Iâm so excited to see her here. When her casting was first announced, many people, myself included, believed that she would be playing the Seraphite prophet, but then in an interview she mentioned that she was doing scenes with Pedro, so that wouldnât make sense. Iâve seen others say that sheâs might be playing a therapist-type character in Jackson. The editing in the trailer definitely makes it seem like that! But I think this is a misdirect. Joelâs dialogue in this trailer is definitely him talking to Tommy like at the beginning of the game. I donât think heâs talking to Catherine there. So who is she talking to? It could be Joel in a different scene. It could also be Ellie. It could also be someone completely different. What a mystery! Iâm so excited to learn more about her character.Â
Oh Joel. My sad old man. He looks so broken here. Pedro, your Emmy is coming! Like I said before, the editing makes it look like heâs talking to Catherine, but I believe this scene is with Tommy.Â
This shot is going to keep me up at night. What is this?? When is this?? Why is my daughter screaming? She has a bandage around her chest, sheâs on a gurney, and someone is holding her shoulder. Could be Maria? My prediction is that this is Ellie right after being brought back to Jackson after Golfing, and sheâs having a freak out. It seems like sheâs looking at something (someone?) What if Joelâs body is in whatever room that is? Iâm not sure. Iâve seen some other people suggest that this could be some kind of nightmare sequence which could also be very possible. I saw another suggestion that this could be Ellie getting the chemical burn to cover her bite mark but Iâm skeptical of that. That scream is way too emotionally charged in my opinion. Whatever the case may be, Bella is showing their acting chops here and I see awards in their future.Â
Another shot that has me stumped. This must be Jackson right? Letâs say for now that it is. Is Jackson under attack? By who? Raiders? Infected? This looks like way too many people to be Abbyâs crew. Maybe this is a flashback. I saw someone suggest that this could be a a flashback to Tommy defending Jackson so that we can see his sharpshooter skills. Thatâs definitely possible. If itâs not Jackson, then could it be a flashback to a Seraphite conflict? Those wooden walls could suggest a Seraphite village. Iâm not sure. This one is a doozy.
Tommy!! He looks so good. I cannot wait to see more Gabriel Luna in this role. Heâs gonna kill it. So this shot comes right after the one with the people running towards that wooden gate (possibly Jackson) and with the editing, it looks like Tommy is on top of that gate. It could very well be the same scene or itâs two different scenes spliced together. I think itâs very possible that this shot is from the scene where Tommy and Joel save Abby. I doubt this is Tommy in Seattle since this is very clearly winter.Â
The Seraphites! They look awesome. Iâm thinking this must be the scene with Ellie in the park on her way to the Hospital on Day 2. It could also be Abbyâs Day 1 when she meets Yara and Lev, but Iâm starting to think we wonât be seeing Abbyâs Seattle days until Season 3. There have been no casting announcements for Yara and Lev.
Dina! My lovely Dina. Okay so Iâm not really sure where this shot would be, but Iâm thinking itâs somewhere in Seattle because of the coat sheâs wearing. Isabela Merced was wearing it while shooting with Bella in Vancouver for Seattle scenes. In the tunnels maybe? The theater? Not sure, but she looks great! I love Dina, and I think Isabela is gonna be great. After seeing her in the Alien: Romulus trailers, Iâm confident that sheâs going to knock it out of the park.Â
Ellie unleashing Hell? Amazing. You go girl.Â
If you look closely, you can see a person standing on the ridge in this shot. My guess is that itâs Abby or Owen scouting out the Jackson area.Â
Jeffrey Wright is back as Isaac! Letâs go! One of my few complaints about Part 2 is not seeing enough of Isaac. Heâs such an intimidating character and I need more. Jeffrey Wright is going to DELIVER.Â
First look at Kaitlyn Dever as Abby! Another shot that couldâve be ripped right out of the game. I think Kaitlyn is going to be an amazing Abby, and I hope for her sake that she doesnât go on any social media when Season 2 premiers. IYKYK.
Nothing much to say here except that this is most likely Jackson/early game. Itâs hard to tell who the riders are. It could be any combination of Ellie, Dina, Jesse, Joel, or Tommy. Or maybe theyâre random patrollers from Jackson; who knows?!
This has to be the subway scene in Seattle Day 1! I love that level; the introduction of the Shamblers, the red flares, clickers and WLF everywhere. Itâs gonna be good.
Clicker in the subway! Makeup looks amazing, but of course Iâm not surprised. This show cannot and will not miss.Â
âI saved her.â Yes you did, Joel. You saved your babygirl. Like the first shot of Joel, I think heâs talking to Tommy here. Most likely not Catherine OâHara (but Iâm open to being surprised!) Pedro just brings so much vulnerability and softness to Joel. Heâs the same character from the games, but heâs also not. Itâs not better or worse, just a little different, and I applaud Pedro for his performance.Â
#tlou#joel miller#pedro pascal#the last of us#tlou hbo#the last of us hbo#neil druckmann#troy baker#bella ramsey#catherine o'hara#jeffrey wright#kaitlyn dever#isabela merced
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hot & heavy
epilogue: our love is going gold
neighbor!joel x f!reader
series masterlist
series rating: E (18+ MDNI)
series summary:
over the course of three summers, joel miller becomes woven into your life. the first summer is spent falling for him; nannying his daughter and sneaking around with him in a burning love affair. you know how you feel about joel, he isnât so sure about how it all is gonna work. the second summer is brief. a month spent at home after graduation and before you move to boston for your dream job. one look at you, one time hearing your voice, and joel is hooked again. he pines over you for that month, but you think â how is long distance of over a thousand miles going to work for a single dad? the third summer, you return home burnt out and pride bruised from your post-grad life. you need time to feel at home again, like your complete self, so youâve come back home with no return ticket booked. itâs only a matter of time before joel seeks you out, slowly spending more time with you. without an inevitable end to the summer looming over you both, what chances are you willing to take?
word count: 17.2k (but she's done. like done, done.)
warnings (**SPOLIERS**): NO OUTBREAK (donât need to worry about the mushies), no use of y/n, inexperienced reader, age gap (joel is 30/31, reader is 22), canon-divergent (sarah is now 10 y/o), nanny au, pet names (sweetheart, darling, sweet girl, mariposa, etc.), established relationship, engagement, marriage, alcohol, eating, very lovey romantic, polite southern manners, spanish/spanglish cause joel is latino, soft joel, domestic joel, WIFE!! GUY!! JOEL!!, discussion of parenting, step-parenting, struggles with conceiving, negative self talk and image, smut, soft dom joel, fingering, oral (f receiving), joel worships the ground his wife walks on and also her body, praise, unprotected p in v (they're tryna get pregnant, not you!), breeding kink, sort of nursing kink? joel is briefly obsessed with your tits and makes comments, mating press, a flash of cumplay, the BRIEFEST mention of daddy kink, joel really wants to give his wife a baby, pregnancy, a mention of giving birth, girl dad joel, CUTE FAMILY!!!
also this is the song mentioned <3 it's a fave of mine and i think very joel & mari
a/n: this has been a doozy but happy to hand this over to y'all. this is simply what i envisioned for their future, and if you had different thoughts, i would love to hear them! <3 or if you have any headcanons for their life beyond this, drop them in my inbox! this fic and these characters are my children and i love them very much. will probably keep them alive somehow. and thank you to everyone who's read this series, you are all so special to me and have sincerely made me feel so much more confident in my writing!
as always, thank you thank you thank you @northernbluess for beta-ing, couldn't do it without you! and this extremely long ending is dedicated to el and kiwi @kiwisbell you are my hype people fr
i feel like i need to say like signing off on h&h now lol so this is me doing that & closing the book!
** this is set over three additional summers post-main story **
first of many
After the holidays, it was an easy decision to move in with Joel and Sarah. The Millers had joined your family for their annual, lowkey celebrations; spending Christmas Eve with Joel and Sarah, it was a treat to witness him playing Santa after Sarah had gone to bed. Only a few curses under his breath putting together the new dollhouse sheâd requested from St Nick, the other presents from her father, and your gifts to her carefully wrapped under the tree. The two of you split the plate of cookies while watching A Christmas Story, you and Joel taking turns mumbling the words to the iconic scenes under your breaths.
The next morning, your heart was overwhelmed with the love that you hold for this family that has welcomed you in and made you a part of it. Sarah gifted you a photo frame that sheâd made at school, painted with flowers and butterflies, and a photo of the three of you from the trip to the apple orchard youâd taken that fall. Once Sarah was occupied with her new treasures, gifts were exchanged between you and Joel. Requesting to gift first, you stand up from the couch and tiptoe around Sarah and her new dolls sprawled across the floor to the front hall closet and retrieve a brand new, custom acoustic guitar.Â
Sitting back with him, guitar placed into his hands and his eyes combing over it, his lips part with a gasping breath when he notices in the inlay of âSMEâ for his daughterâs name, Sarah Elena.
âThe old one in the corner of your room was lookinâ a little worse for wear, and I hadnât seen you play it in a whileâŚâ you trail off in the silence, waiting for his response, âDo youâdo you like it? Is it the right kind? I tried to match it the best I could to the one upstairs.â
âOh, Mari baby, I love it. Itâs beautiful, thank you so muchâŚâ He shakes his head, taking another sighing exhale in appreciation as he turns it in his hands. âHadnât played the other one 'cause it wasnât quite playable anymore. Restrung it a few too many times, the wood was warped from some water damage. The perils of having a toddler around years ago. This isâŚitâs perfect, Mariposa.â
You beam, shifting in your seat and anxiously fiddling with your fingers. Joel sets the instrument down next to him carefully, turning back to you. He leans in, kissing you delicately and whispering another âthank youâ against your lips, âGuess mâgonna have to serenade you now.â
âOh, yeah, J. I expect one nightly,â you playfully respond, kissing him again before he pulls away, his turn to stand from his place on the couch.Â
He wanders over to the tree, plucking the last wrapped gift from under it, and returning to sit next to you. Handing over the small rectangular box, you unwrap it gingerly, glancing at Joelâs knee bouncing. You gently set your hand on it, smiling at him which he returns, biting his lip to channel his jittery energy. Opening the box, youâre met with the shining gold links of a beautiful charm bracelet. Your eyes wander over the small icons, feeling your chest tighten with love as you take them all in: A small âSâ with a ruby-colored stone at each end of the curve, a matching âJâ with a sapphire embedded into it right next to the âS; thereâs a tiny gold key, nearly identical to the one he had given to you those three summers before for your job that started it all; a tiny set of longhorn antlers that is reminiscent of home; a lighthouse that reminds you of one you visited while living in Boston, a day you had documented and sent Joel some of the photos in the mail to recap your time. It was a day you had been happy there, and it made your heart ache that he remembered that. The last charm on the bracelet is a butterfly, bejeweled with kelly green stones, the color of the leaves that you told him were your favorite years ago. The ache in your chest is worked out of its knot with Joelâs hand at your back, a gasping breath as you blink back tears.
Clearing your throat, your watery smile has a flash of worry crossing his eyes before you hand him the bracelet youâve taken out of the box, lightly requesting, âWill you put it on for me?â
Joel nods shyly, taking the dainty piece in his hands, and hooking the clasp around your wrist after a few tries. You both admire it, your smile growing wider and his matching yours.
âMerry Christmas, Mari baby. I love you.â
âMerry Christmas, J. I love you, too.â
Now, months later, the bracelet on your wrist glints in the sun as you hold onto Sarahâs hand, letting her lead you around the atrium filled with butterflies. Spending the day at the same farm you three had visited summers ago, and had kept up with the tradition with the summers following, you picked an abundance of strawberries, wandered through the nature paths, and now ending the day at the youngest Millerâs favorite spot.
Sarah wildly points out the different types of butterflies, the encyclopedia book of the insectâs species that you had gifted her for Christmas coming in handy for today as she reads the small signs of each patterned, winged creature, adding in her tidbits that she remembers. A grin stays plastered on your face as you listen intently, paying no mind to Joel trailing behind the two of you.
Giving your lessons on the flora that you know of in the gardens, Sarah listens to you as well. Stopping in front of the small waterfall, surrounded by tropical plants and flowers, the two of you go back and forth in fun facts about plants and butterflies, unaware as Joel saddles up behind you. Sarah glances back over her shoulder and grins, the expression reading as knowing and mischievous. Before turning around, you start to warn Joel behind you playfully, âJ, if youâre even thinking about pushing me or splashing me, I will kiââ
Your breath catches when you finally face him, eyes dropping to meet his; the backpack heâd be adamant about carrying all day is at his feet, unzipped, and in his hands is a small, forest-green velvet box. Joel rests on one knee, a soft but bright, devoted smile on his face.
âOh my godâŚâ It comes from your lips as a whisper, your free hand reaching up to cover your mouth while the other continues to tether you to Sarah at your side, her small giggle hitting your ears as Joel glances at her, sending her a wink.
Eyes back on your face, Joel clears his throat, adjusting himself on his knee as he takes a deep breath, âI have been trying to figure out exactly what to say, and I canât seem to find quite the right words that tell you exactly how I feel about you. I love you, so much, Mariposa. The second you entered my life, that time I saw you for only seconds in your backyard while I was touring the house, I knew I had to meet you. And then the first time I met you, well, I knew that you were who I needed.
âIâve been walking around blind, trying to figure out life for years, and moving next door to you, that was the last piece falling into place. You have made my life, and Sarahâs life, a million times better. And while these past few years havenât been picture-perfect for us, we made it through, and I know that we can take on anything that comes our way. Eres el alma mĂĄs hermosa que he conocido, y soy muy afortunada de tenerte. (You are the most beautiful soul I have ever met, and I am so lucky to have you.) Iâve been waiting for years to do this, Mari baby, and I canât have any more summers pass by without you being mine. TĂş eres mi media naranja. (Youâre my soulmate.) I love you. Te amo, Mari. Youâre my soulmate, sweet girl, and I canât take another day without the promise of forever. Will you marry me, Mariposa?â
Without hesitation, you nod your head frantically, your tears that started falling as soon as Joel started speaking continue to flow. You uncover your mouth, squeezing Sarahâs hand and sharing a smile with her before she takes her hand away.
âYes, oh my gosh, JoelâŚof course, of course, Iâll marry you. I love you so much, J.â You squat down in front of him, left hand trembling as you hold it out for him. He carefully takes the ring from the box, and Sarah, ever the helper, takes it from the spot where it rests on his knee for safekeeping. The delicate gold band slips onto your finger, embellished with clusters of tiny gems and centered with an emerald cut diamond. Itâs perfectly you, and you canât wipe the smile off your face as you watch Joel settle the piece of jewelry on your finger. Both of you take a deep breath, admiring the sight before your eyes find each otherâs again, matching expressions of complete admiration. Your hands find his cheeks, pulling him in for a tenderly passionate kiss, attempting to breathe all the love in your chest into the kiss and his heart. Joel pulls away first, resting his forehead against yours for a quiet moment.
âThank you, J,â you whisper, and his head tilts with curiosity.
âFor what, baby? I think I should be thankinâ you for sayinâ yes to me.â He chuckles and rubs his thumb at the back of your hand, skimming next to the band of the new addition.
âEverything. For not giving up. Your patience when I was still finding my way back to you. How effortlessly youâve welcomed me into your life and your familyâŚâ Cheating your body away, one hand reaches out to pull Sarah into the small huddle, reuniting the moment within your unit of three, âI justâI canât wait for all my summers to be spent with you both.â
âI canât wait either. This is gonna be the first of many, Mari baby.â
And the two of you really couldnât wait.
Only a week after Joel was down on one knee, your family was throwing you an engagement party. Tommy, a few of Joelâs close friends from his contracting company, your college friends, and neighbors were all in attendance to celebrate the two of you, and it was a big to-do. Drinks flowing, music playing, and food was being passed around. Everything under the warmth of a Texas night and the strung lights across the stretch of your parentsâ backyard. Joel was glued to your side the entire night, hand on your back or clasped in yours, grabbing your refills and whispering in your ear to make you laugh.
âSoâŚare all of these people coming to the wedding? âCause I can count about half that I have no idea who they are.â
To that, you whispered back, âI donât know them either, so definitely not. Unless they wanna buy us the most expensive thing on the registry.â Joel laughed, squeezing you closer â if it were even possible â and pressing a kiss to your temple.
Later, once you two were far past tipsy, Joel mumbled against your ear, barely able to get the words out without drunkenly giggling himself, âDâyou think Mrs. Clarke is thinkinâ mâthe one that got away?â
You couldnât contain your laughter, bursting out in the middle of the conversation happening around you two, quickly covering your mouth as the lingering hiccups escape, âI think sheâs singinâ the blues about you, Miller.â
The rest of the evening was filled with small moments between the two of you; never left alone long enough to have a full conversation on your own. Whispers of love and affection breathed out, fleeting kisses exchanged. It wasnât until the party was over, everyone dwindled out the door and back to their homes, that you and Joel took a beat to speak to each other in more than one sentence. The early hours of the morning had crept in without anyone quite noticing, and Sarah was knocked out, brought inside to sleep in your old bedroom around 10pm when she couldnât keep her eyes open anymore. Joel now held her in his arms, her head laying on his shoulder while the three of you walked the short distance home. After your quiet goodnight to Sarah that went unheard by her sleeping self, Joel put her down, taking off her shoes and leaving her undisturbed to sleep in her clothes.
Back in the ensuite of your, now, shared bedroom, youâre lazily getting ready for bed, movements slower and lagging from the alcohol you consumed. Joel stands behind you, facing your reflection in the mirror and giving you a smile as the exhaustion catches up to him.
âYou have fun tonight, sweet girl?â His vocal cords rub together in a fry, hands finding their place on your waist and drawing you back into his chest. Littering kisses at the back of your neck, he hums contently before you affectionately shoo him off to brush his teeth while you apply your skincare.
ââCourse I did, J. Spent most of the night with you, how could I not have fun?â You grin at him from in front of your side of the double sinks, gently rubbing in your moisturizer. âHave you given any thought as to when you wanna set a date for?â
Whatever he responds is muffled by the foamy toothpaste, your face twisting in confusion before he leans over and spits out, rinsing his mouth and toothbrush. Standing back up, he rests his hip against the countertop while facing you, shrugging as he smirks slightly, âAs soon as possible. Baby, Iâd get married to ya in a garbage dump if it meant we could get married right this second. No puedo esperar para hacerte mi esposa. (Canât wait to make you my wife.) And I know you donât want that, and I want to make you happy, so whenever you want, Mari. Lo que sea que desees, lo harĂŠ realidad. (Whatever you wish for, Iâll make a reality.) But I will say, summerâs kind of our thing.â
A gentle smile stretches across your lips as you step closer, hands coming to rest on his chest and massaging your fingers gently into the muscles there, âWell, how about we do this summer? I mean, I donât want anything fancy, just something special for us. Thought maybe we could do it here, in our backyard and my parentsâ. Where we met and fell in love and broke up and fell in love again andââ
âI love that idea, sweetheart. Think itâs perfect for usâŚâ Joel punctuates his work by stealing a kiss, mint and strawberry lip balm melting on his tongue when he deepens it only for a few seconds, âThink we can manage for Labor Day weekend, mi amor?â
Nodding confidently, your hands skate up to his shoulders, pulling him down for another kiss, âI believe we just set our wedding date, Miller.â
âDamn right, we did, Miller.â
A whirlwind of planning and three months later, you now stand in your childhood bedroom on the second floor of your parentâs house, admiring yourself in the full-length mirror standing in the corner. Your mom had helped you with your hair, a small gold barette holding one side away from your face; your makeup was fairly minimal, fresh, and bright, but nothing too heavy that would melt in the heat that has graced Austin this weekend.
On your wrist is your charm bracelet from Joel, a simple gold locket to match that your father had gifted you the evening before at the rehearsal dinner â it has belonged to his grandmother, and now your grandma wanted you to have it since she couldnât make the trip down due to her age. It was your âsomething oldâ he said, playing into the old traditions that seemed to charm your entire family.Â
Your âsomething borrowedâ was a pair of white strappy sandals from your mom, ones that she had worn to her rehearsal dinner when she married your dad. The title of âsomething newâ belonged to the charm hanging off of your wrist that was hand-delivered to you this morning from Tommy, per the request of Joel since you both were getting ready in opposite houses. The gift box unveiled a gold lotus flower, hand painted with deep magenta petals. Inside the lid of the box was a folded note, the words written by your soon-to-be husband in his usual scrawl.
Mi amor,
Got to reading one of your books you leave around about plants, and they were talking about the lotus flower. Made me think of you â since they go back to the murky water each evening and open their blooms at the break of day. You always start fresh, sweet girl, youâre so resilient and strong and pure of heart. No matter what happens, you get through it. And you wonât have to go at it alone, baby. Iâm gonna be right there with you through anything.
You make me a better man.
Te amo, mi media naranja.
J
You had to touch up your makeup after having read the note over and over for minutes straight, now fresh faced and eager to get downstairs. One last time in the mirror, you give yourself the once over, smoothing the long, full skirt of your linen dress. The ruched empire bodice lays across your chest, framing your neck with a square shape along with the cap sleeves. Simple, but it feels perfectly you. And now, you were finally on your way to get your something blue: Joel in his navy suit, waiting at the end of the aisle for you.
Everyoneâs gathered in their seats, only a crowd of around forty people from your lives occupying the rows, all carefully selected to make the cut. It was easy for Joel, he had three people he wanted there for sure, and well, his daughter didnât have a choice living right next door, plus with her dad being the groom, and you being the bride. The only chance of a wild card he had was Tommy, but he was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning despite the many shots he had the night prior. At the rehearsal dinner of all places.
Dressed and gaffed, he stands at the end of the short aisle after having walked down it hand-in-hand with Sarah, who was donning a lilac dress she picked out with your help and her hair in her natural, bouncy curls. She now sits next to Tommy in the front row, whose new girlfriend Maria is sitting on the other side of him, stealing peeks over the back of the seat to try to catch a glimpse of you at the top of the deck stairs. Joel is doing the same, eyes flickering from scanning over the crowd to tunneling at the opening of the stairs.Â
Music starts and it immediately tunes out of his ears, a tingle of excitement radiating from his chest throughout his body. A vision in white, you appear at the stairs with your arm linked to your dad, Mark; he isnât paying attention to anything but you, captivated by your beauty. His heartbeat kicks up when you walk down, reaching the end of the grassy path between rows of chairs, and stopping for a moment. With the bouquet in one hand, you use the other that was resting on your dadâs arm to give him a short wave that he returns with a grin.
Each step you take brings up tears in his eyes, an overwhelming joy clenching around his heart. A few drop down his cheeks, using one of his thumbs to wipe away the streaks as you give him a gentle smile, speeding up your walk and dragging your dad along with you. The guests laugh at the eagerness, Joel rocking on the balls of his feet as he bites back his wild grin when you finally reach him. Exchanging hugs with your dad, Mark shakes Joelâs hand before clapping him on the back, a sure nod directed to him.
His hand slips into yours naturally, helping you with the last few steps to stand in front of him, exhaling a deep breath. A smile that he canât wipe off stretches across his face, looking into your eyes as he lifts a hand to wipe his cheeks. You do the same, delicate touch against his skin while your gaze stays trained on his. Beating out of his chest, his heart thumps deeply, the wings of his butterfly fluttering madly in his gut in time with his heartbeat.
âHey, Mari.â
âHi, J.â
Everyone settles back in their seats, and your brother stands at the makeshift altar, a carved arbor handmade by Joel over the last few months frames the three of you in front of your guests. You turn to hand off the wildflower bouquet you put together to Sarah, eager to fulfill her responsibility of holding it during the ceremony. She grins, whispering to you loud enough for him to hear when she takes the arrangement.
âYou look so pretty, Posey. Iâm excited for you to marry Daddy.â Your hand reaches for her curls, squatting down in your dress to address her at eye level, unconditional love shining in your eyes as you look at his daughter.
âYou look beautiful, Sare Bear. Iâm so excited, too.â Other words are exchanged only between the two of you, a hug shared before Sarah retreats to her chair next to Tommy and you stand up and take Joelâs hands.
Chris ambles through an introduction, recollecting his version of events, as well as both of your sides, for how your relationship has progressed. Humor was laced throughout, laughter bubbling over throughout the crowd of guests, and especially between the two of you when you shared knowing expressions.
The ceremony moves quickly, with no religious elements to extend the length, simply secular. Before he knows it, Chris is reaching the vows, allowing a moment for Tommy to present the rings to each of you, clapping a hand on his brotherâs back.
âDonât fuck this one up, brother. Poseyâs a good âun. Way too good for youââ
Joel cuts him off with a mumble and an eye roll, âI know all of this, Tommy, but thank you for the reminder.â
Chris directs Joel to go first, a deep inhale and extended exhale fills the air as you give his hands a reassuring squeeze. He flashes a smile at you before he drops one of your hands, finishing in his inside jacket pocket for the small slip of paper.
âI tried to memorize this, but we both know that wasnât gonna happenâŚâ he huffs out a nervous chuckle, reading over the page before his eyes come back to you, a patient and gentle grin on your face, âI genuinely hope you know how much I love you. I try to show you, to tell you, to make you feel it through osmosis every day, but I truly hope you can feel it. Through all that we have been through together and on our own, I have always had you in my mind. I thought about you every day you were away, and all I was hoping for was your happiness. I cannot tell you what it means that you have found your happiness with me, but I will be thanking whatever forces are out there for bringing us back together. Our roads may have been bumpy, and they may be in the future, but Iâm so thankful to have you in my passenger seat. Cause we both know you donât like to drive.â Joel winks and the crowd of guests laugh.
âI never want to let go. And Iâm never going to let you go, Mariposa, Iâm in it for the long run. Eres todo para mĂ. (You are everything to me.) You are everything I have ever asked for, hoped for, didn't think I deserved. You areâŚun alma tan pura (such a pure soul) and I don't know how you ended up with me, but I'm countinâ my luck every second of every day. I love you through anything, mi Mariposa, and I cannot wait for our future together, as a family. Iâm so happy that you have found a place you belong with Sarah and me, and I feel so lucky that you have chosen me. Te amo, mi Mariposa. Siempre.â
Recovering from your tears, you choke out a small sob that tugs on his heartstrings, tightening his grip on your hand while his brow furrows softly in concern.
âHappy tears, I promise, J. Very happy tears.â Another sob comes with a burst of laughter, a hand of yours fanning your face. Joel reaches up, wiping away the stragglers, careful to not smudge any of your mascara. With a deep breath, you focus back, centered, offering Joel your left hand. He repeats the phrase from Chris, who recites it from his printed-out online ordainment course before slipping the simple matching gold band onto your finger above your engagement ring, ears ringing when he sees the symbol of his love and commitment on your finger, where it will stay for the rest of his time on this Earth.
Next, it was your turn to recite your vows, Chris pulled a piece of paper from his jacket and handed it to you. A giggle slips from your lips, wavering the small folded sheet, âCouldnât memorize it either. Got too much to sayâŚâ
Joel relaxes in his stance, thumb circling the back of your palm as he listens, the butterfly wings fluttering into his chest and up to his head, love overwhelming his nervous system across his body. You clear your throat, looking up from the wrinkled white sheet, âI didnât know that one summer spent at home would completely send me on a whole new life path, but looking back, I am eternally grateful that I wanted to mooch off my parents for as long as possible. That first summer, I fell hard and fast, and despite the obstacles, my love continued to root deeper inside of me and grow out new branches with every memory we made together. I am so lucky to have been welcomed so easily into the Miller household, and I cannot imagine my life with you or Sarah there right next to me. You both have brought so much into my life and thanks to you, J, I feel like I have truly found myself.Â
âI was always searching for what I was meant to do, who I was meant to be, and what I would leave behind in my life. And while I went out searching everywhere, the answer was my next-door neighbor. I am meant to be your person, I was meant to care and love and create a life with you, and your wonderful daughter, and I know I will leave behind all my love for you and our family behind. My success does not need to be measured by the reach of my impact, but by how deeply I love you. That is all that matters to me, to make you feel loved and supported and to know how incredible you are. You mean the world to me, and I love Sarah as if she were my own; both of you are my best friends and I could not do this life without you. I am so excited to spend the rest of my days, and the rest of my summers with you, J. I love you. Forever.â
The same routine goes for you, slipping a gold band around Joelâs left ring finger. He flexes with the new accessory on his hand, admiring it before he looks at you, a wide and wild grin crossing his face as he listens as Chris starts to ask him that very special question, âJoel, do you taââ
âAbsolutely I do. No question.â
Laughter rises from the attendees, and you, playfully roll your eyes. Chris nods shortly, chuckling as he turns to address you with the same question. He states your name, inquiring, âDo you taââ
âOf course, I do. Only been waitinâ years for this to happen.âÂ
Joel laughs, shaking his head as he mumbles a sweet agreement, âYou and me both, baby.â
Chris drops the papers he was reading from next to him on the grass, clasping his hands together, âWell, that made it damn easy for me. With the power vested in me by apparently the state of Texas, but who really knows, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Now yâall can kiss finally.â
A hand presses against the small of your back, pulling you into his chest as he folds down, latching your lips to his in a deep kiss, all of his love pouring into the moment. It takes restraint to not take it further in front of everyone, your intoxicating taste drawing him in and quenching a perpetual thirst he has. You lean back first, fingertips digging into his shoulders to hold him off as you whisper, âGotta keep some decorum until tonight, Mr. Miller.â
âHard to do that with you, Mrs. Miller,â he rasps back, matching blindingly bright grins across your faces as you right yourself, turning to face your guests as your brother loudly announces.
âFor the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Miller!â
With the low-key, intimate wedding that you both had planned together, there was no real formal separation of the ceremony and reception. Instead, everyone wandered over to the backyard of Joelâs home, which was now yours, too. There were rented tables set up with chairs around, no seating chart, and a checkered dance floor set up in the middle of the lawn. Lights have been strung from his deck to the tree at the back of the property line that holds Sarahâs tire swing, some lanterns strewn about to add more light as the sun sets in the later evening.Â
The family-favorite restaurant in the city that the three of you have frequented, even as friends, catered the meal, and your parents, ever so prepared, had stocked up all summer with booze. Your dad plays pretend bartender, getting your now-husband behind the tablecloth-covered folding table and pouring heavy drinks and somehow heavier shots. By sundown, everyone was liquored up enough to cheer for you both to have a first dance, chanting their request over and over.
Joel looks at you from his spot next to you, eyebrows raising in question. His hand at your back draws you closer, starting to sway to whatever song is playing as he grins with a looseness to him, relieved to have you as his for good and relaxed from the alcohol in his blood. âCâmon, Mari baby, I wanna dance with you. Mâwife. I got the perfect song.â
âOkay, okay, you go tell Chris what song you want and see if heâs got it on his iPod.âÂ
You push Joel along, giggling to yourself as he shuffles over to Chris, the makeshift DJ for the evening. Joel leans in, talking in your brotherâs ear over the music currently playing. They exchange a smile and nod, Joel laying a hand on his shoulder and shaking it affectionately. His beer gets abandoned on the nearest surface, giddily running over to you and taking your hand. Impatiently, he pulls you to the center of the dance floor, and Tommy intercepts your drink before it sloshes all over the front of you, huffing out a disbelieving breath as you continue to drag behind Joel.
Your husband turns you in his arms, one hand finding your back as the other lifts your joined ones toward his shoulder, elbows bent. Everyone else clears the dancefloor as an upbeat guitar riff sounds out of the speakers surrounding the dancefloor, the bright drums kicking in as Joel starts to shuffle the two of you around the dancefloor, a swing to your movements again.
The familiar lyrics of Orleansâ Still the One that Joel has sung to you many times over the last year are recited right back to you, making you reminisce about the time you were driving in the car to pick up Sarah from camp, a rare afternoon that both of you had off together. The song had come onto Joelâs favorite classic rock station, perking him up in his seat as he turned the volume dial up.
âOh, Mari baby, this is such a great song.â
Not as familiar with it, you listen, giggling as he sings along with his words pointed at you, and you had to admit, they were pretty sickly sweet. Ever since then, Joel got into the habit of singing it to you, learning to play it after he received his new guitar from you at Christmas.
Dancing with him now, under the sticky heat of the tail end of Texan summer, surrounded by family and friends, he makes you feel as if itâs only the two of you again like it was for every other moment before with this same song.
In your ear, he sings along only for you, pulling away and twirling you as yâall take over the entire dancefloor with how free and loose youâre playing it. âYouâre still the one that makes me laughâŚstill the one thatâs my better halfâŚweâre still havinâ fun and youâre still the one.â
At the next chorus, you join him in singing along, laughing at his excitement, both of you singing along louder. The song reaches the guitar solo, and Joel takes both of your hands, swinging you out from his chest before pulling you back in; he spins you to cross your arms in front of you, and your back to his chest before twirling you out. On the last line, when the final word is dragged out, he wraps his arms around you, spinning both of you around until the final chord strikes, setting you down and chests heaving to catch your breaths. Wide smiles still find your open mouths, cheers and whistles from the guests gathered around the dancefloor, now filling the checkered floor as the next song plays.
Breathless, Joel grins madly, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly before asking, âThink we did pretty damn good for unplanned, donât you, Miller?â
âDamn right, we did, Miller.â
The rest of the evening was all the same, a night spent with your closest family and friends all celebrating the two of you and your love. Both you and Joel shared a dance with Sarah separately, relishing in her unbridled joy and Joel comforted his daughter when she shed a few tears about how happy she was. Your dad pulled you for a short jaunt around the dancefloor, and Joel asked your mom for a dance, which she accepted happily as a stand-in for his mom.
More drinks flowed into glasses and out of bottles, your shoes kicked off and Joelâs jacket and tie discarded onto the back of a chair somewhere. Your cheeks ached from how much you were smiling and laughing the whole time, a weight lifted, the promise of forever with your favorite person now on its way to being a reality.
You both ceremoniously cut the small single-tiered cake that your mom ordered, serving the slice on a plate. Grabbing a piece with your hands, you cheers it with Joelâs, watching as his went into his mouth and laughing as yours went across his cheek. He feigned shock, shaking his head as he looked at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes, taking a step closer. A turn on the ball of your foot directs you in an attempt to get away; failing miserably, misstepping from your level of drunkenness, Joel catches you in his arms. Turning you back around to face him, he steals a purposefully sloppy kiss, buttercream smearing against your lips and chin, the taste of vanilla coating your tongue as it melts into the taste of Joel, whiskey, beer, and sugary sweetness from the dessert.
At the very end of the night, most guests in cabs home or retreat to their homes down the street, itâs left to your closest people. The last song of the night is announced by Chris, the same song that has come up again and again for the two of you trilling over the speakers. Everyone dances and sings along to American Pie, the perfect cyclical moment for the two of you, and the closing moment of your summer. Sarah dances with the two of you, laughing as Joel twirls her around, infectious smiles on their faces.Â
Your heart grows in your chest, nearly to the point of bursting as you take a step back in your mind, taking in all of the moment as it surrounds you. In the backyard of your new house, the next chapter of your life starts with Joel and Sarah; right next door is your childhood home, full of love and memories with your parents and brother. Even through the hardships, these places and people have never stopped feeling like home.
The song finishes with a flourish, Joel tucking you into his chest after he scoops Sarah into his arms with a soft groan. Sarah lays her head on her dad drowsily and he presses a kiss to her forehead, mirroring the same on yours; a mumble against your skin is barely heard by you, his drawl exaggerated by the liquor, âMi Mariposa y mariposita. My lilâ Bug. Love my girls so much.â
Tommy slides sleepy Sarah into his arms from Joel after you two say goodnight to her, the younger Miller brother already prepared the arrangement for her to stay at his on the night of your wedding. You reassure her the promise to meet at Waffle House in the morning, which will likely be the afternoon with the state of the adults. Maria, the designated driver, and Tommy, much closer to sober than drunk than you were expecting, send another congratulations your way before theyâre off to the car with Sarah.
After the necessary sweep of cleaning is done between you two and your immediate family, food, drink, and lanterns gathered, they part ways, taking everything back to theirs to deal with in the morning along with striking down the tables, chairs, and dancefloor. In the quiet of the early morning hours, you and Joel stand with your arms around each other, swaying gently. Cheek to chest, Joelâs voice rasps from overuse, vibrating your ear pressed against him, âWas it what you wanted, sweet girl?â
âEverything and more, J. I loved it,â you say as you pull your head away, tilting your chin to look into his eyes, âAnd I love you, mâhusband.â
âI love you more, mâwife.â He shakes his head, biting a smile back, âDonât think mâever gonna get tired of callinâ you that, Mari.â
âMe neither. Gonna be callinâ you my husband instead of usinâ your name,â you flirt as your smirk grows and he wiggles his eyebrows, hand drifting down to the curve of your ass.
âGuess we better test that theory, baby.â He grins as he bends his knees, lifting you over his shoulder. His other hand rests on your ass to balance you, your hands pressing against his lower back as you shriek slightly from the initial shock. âWant the whole neighborhood to know mâyour husband now. Even if they werenât invited, so you better be loud, mâgorgeous wife.â
He walks you both up the stairs and through the backdoor, your snort echoing in the quiet of the night, pulling out the olâ faithful from the early days with him, âYes, sir.â
second nature
âWhat do you think about getting a dog?â you ask from your seat on the bed, propped up against the headboard with a book in your lap. Joel pops his head out from the en-suite, brow quirked as he continues to towel off his hair and laugh softly.
âCanât say Iâve thought about it, darlinâ.â He disappears again, hanging his towel on the back of the door before coming back out of the bathroom with a clean pair of boxers on, washed up from his long day on-site. âHave you been thinking about getting a dog?â
A sheepish grin stretches across your face, shrugging your shoulders as Joel gets into bed. He matches your position, leaning back against the headboard and turning his head toward you. Heâs intrigued. If he wasnât, heâd tell you that you could talk about it more in the morning, and then he would give you his honest opinion in the light of day. Never wanting to start a silly argument before bed, always attempting to keep the peace.
Which made him great at compromising. To what you wanted in the first place.
âIâve been thinking it would be nice for Sarah. Like something to learn responsibility â teaching her to feed it on schedule and take it for walks and fill the water bowl.â
âYeah, itâll teach her that Iâll take on all those responsibilities when she gets bored of it,â your husband snorts at his own comment, making you roll your eyes playfully and scoot closer.
âOh, câmon, J. Donât you think it would be fun to have a dog around? We wouldnât even need to get a puppy if you think itâs too much. But I work at home nannying baby Amelia so Iâd be around all day and then when Sarah gets home from school or camp, she can take him or her for a walk. And then feed it before you even get home. Oh! Or you could take the dog to work with you! How cute would that be, you could train him to grab your tools for you.âÂ
A contagious smile brightens your face in the low lamplight, one that Joel canât help but mirror on his own face. The eagerness is evident in your expression and your voice, and the proposition doesnât seem like it would be too difficult of an adjustment. Shaking his head at your suggestions, he laughs quietly while reaching a hair up to smooth your hair away from your face.
âAre you gonna be the one to teach it what all the different screwdrivers are?âÂ
An excited gasp exhales and you scramble to straddle Joelâs lap, âWait, are you serious? Youâre actually okay with getting a dog?â
Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you lean back to look at his face. His hands find the curve where your thighs melt into your ass, squeezing gently. Always handsy.
âYeah, baby, we can get a dog.â Joel groans dramatically when you pull yourself tight against him, hugging him while on hand rubs back and forth at the base of your spine. âIâve got some conditions though.â
Unraveling from his neck, you stay perched in his lap, nodding fervently. âAnything. Whatever you want, if it means we get a dog.â
âOh, anything?â he teases with another squeeze of your bum, laughing when you shoot him a look.
âNot what I meant, Miller. Get your mind out of the gutter.â
âCanât help it with you, sweet girl. My mindâs always in the gutter around you.â The sentiment is punctuation with a tender kiss to your lips and one to your forehead. Calloused palms skate along your bare thighs, humming contently, âConditions are: has to be a big dog. Donât want one of those little white dogs or like something thatâll break if we have babies and theyâre a little rough with it.â
The forethought he has for your future children warms your heart, and you agree immediately, âDeal. Didnât want a little dog anyways. What else?â
âGotta fence in the backyard. I donât mind putting in a gate for us and your parents to easily go back and forth through, but I donât want the chance of the dog gettinâ out when weâre all outside.â
âTotally understandable. Iâll even help you install the fence,â you offer proudly.
âThatâs real sweet, Mari baby, thank you. You donât gotta lift a finger though, Iâll bring some of the guys over and pay a little extra and weâll get it done in a day, no problem.â
âAlright, so big dog, fence. Anything else youâd like to negotiate, Mr. Miller?â you mock a formal tone, turning your nose up. Joel laughs, tightening his arms around your waist and tugging you closer. Kisses press into your neck and along your jaw, pausing inches away from your lips as he makes his final request.
âDog sleeps in Sarahâs room or downstairs. I like our privacy.â He smirks before kissing you deeply, easily flipping you onto your back and hovering above you. Your legs hook around his waist and he raises his eyebrows, âThat all sound fair to you, Mariposa?â
âAbsolutely it does. Guess weâre getting a dog, riââ Youâre cut off by his lips on yours again, pressing you further into the mattress with his body weight.
âLetâs save the rest of this for the morning,â Joel mumbles against your skin as he trails his mouth down your neck to your collarbone, ââCause right now, I think Iâd rather get some pussy.â
He doubles over in laughter at his own joke, forehead pressing against your chest as his shoulders heave. Your fingers comb into his hair, unable to fight quiet chuckles of your own no matter how hard you try to not give him the satisfaction.
âGod, youâre such a dork.â
The clock rolls to 3pm as you sit in your car, lined up along with parents of campers. Shrills of laughter and screams echo from the bright, primary-colored playground across the way, counselors attempting to corral the kids to lead them out for pick-up. Air conditioning blasts on you as you fan at the back of your neck, exhaling in the sweltering Texan heat. Itâs only the beginning of summer, June barely having turned over, but the temperatures have reached record highs for the year already.
Your stepdaughter. The thought still makes you smile months on, the dynamic between the two of you falling naturally into a closer, more nurturing relationship. Little acknowledgments from Sarah have made your heart sing over the days; routinely saying goodnight to you along with Joel, asking you for permission to go play outside, seeking you out nearly as much as Joel when she has had a nightmare. The pair of you have built routines of your own before bed, you making a promise to Sarah to read with her and to show her your favorite books from when you were her age.
A few nights ago, Sarah had retreated with you to her room, at least thirty minutes before her bedtime to get in another chapter of Matilda by Roald Dahl. The main character reminded you of Sarahâs sweet and spunky personality, and you were so excited that she fell in love with the story and its characters as quickly as you did when you read it for the first time.
Sat up against her headboard, Sarah laid back in your arms and cracked open the novel where her bookmark stuck out, started to read aloud to you in the low lamplight. Mindlessly, you played with her hair as you listened to her confidently recite the words from the page. The day caught up to you, the peaceful moment pulled a yawn from your lungs. Sarahâs words slowed down, her eyes slowly blinking until they closed, which was your queue to slip the book from her hands and mark the spot, and laid it on her nightstand.
When you tried to slip out from behind her to leave her to sleep soundly, she stirred, mumbling the sweetest, âWill you stay for a little bit, Posey?â
And you had no choice but to oblige her request. After getting comfortable next to her, Sarah curled into your side and you pressed a kiss to her forehead, continued to play with her hair to soothe her back to sleep.
What you hadnât realized was that you also drifted off in her twin bed with her, the lamp still on. Joel was watching TV downstairs, waiting for you to retreat down the steps as you do every night, but no sign of you after an hour had him standing up to go searching. It was quiet when he reached the top of the stairs, no telling giggles or loud whispers to give the two of you away.Â
He pushed open the cracked door of Sarahâs bedroom, and was met with a sight that squeezed his heart tight, a sigh exhaled from his lungs. You tucked right next to his little one, and both slept deeply. Without disturbing your rest, he tiptoed over to the nightstand, tugged the blanket up over both of you before he hovered above the bed to press a gentle kiss to each of your foreheads.Â
Lamp clicked off, he whispered to your unconscious ears, âGânight, girls. Love you two.â
It was a few hours before your usual alarm when youâd woken up, sore from the small space and glanced around the dark room to discover you had fallen asleep next to Sarah. Carefully slipped out from the covers, you tucked her back in and padded down the hall to your bedroom where Joel was sleeping, a soft snore came from him as heâd starfished out on the mattress. You gently shook him half awake to move him, and he groaned softly at the disruption before he tugged you into his chest and pressed a drowsy kiss to your shoulder.
âWas jusâ too cute to wake you up, Mari baby. My Mariposa and my lilâ BugâŚâ He hummed sleepily into your skin, hand gently rubbed circles in your lower belly while your eyes close, desperate for those last few hours of slumber. âMakes me so happy.â
âMe too, J. Mâso, so happy sheâs that comfortable with me. My baby best friend. And youâre my big baby best friendâŚâ You breathed out an airy giggle and Joel protested weakly behind you, a gentle pinch to your side before you both exchanged a quick âlove youâ and drifted right back off.
The reminder of the sweet moment in the morning from Joel was the highlight of your week.
Climbing out of the car, the engine running and door open, you round the front bumper and stand on the curb to wait. You find her before she finds you, calling out to her to grab her attention, âHey, sweet pea!â
Her familiar deep brown irises search for the source of your voice, landing on your face and waving excitedly. Sarah checks out with her counselor for the day, scurrying over to you with her backpack bouncing at her shoulders.
âHi, Posey!â
She collides with your torso, her growth spurts finally starting over the last few months so the top of her head hits just at your chest, and nearly knocks the wind out of you. Patting her back, you laugh and pull her back to look her in the face, âWell, hello to you too, Sare Bear. How was camp today? You ready to go?â
After your greetings, she climbs into the backseat on the opposite side of Ameliaâs car seat. You store her bag in the passenger seat with yours before retreating around to the driverâs side, heading off once both of you are secured in your seatbelts.
Flicking your eyes up in the rearview mirror, the two of you catch up, which mostly consists of her recapping the camp activities and excitedly talking about the pool day thatâs planned for Friday. As you turn onto your street, Sarahâs brow furrows at the sight of Joelâs truck in the driveway.
âDadâs home already? Thatâs weird.â
âHm, I guess he is. Or maybe heâs just stopped by to grab something he forgot. You know how he is.â
Sarah laughs in agreement as you park your car next to his truck. Both of you get out and head in through the garage, straight into the kitchen where Joelâs standing at the counter eating a sandwich.
âTold you, Sare, stopped by âcause he forgot something. Lunch.â You send him a teasing grin as you deposit Sarahâs bag by the door and kick off your sandals. She does the same before wandering past her dad to the fridge in search of a snack. Apple doesnât fall far.
âWhat? I canât happen to drop in hoping to see my wife and my daughter in the middle of my work day? Do I have to have ulterior motives?â Joel speaks, words muffling around the bite in his mouth as you approach the island to stand opposite him.
âDad, you literally always ask âWhatâs for dinner?â or âWhatâs cookinâ?â after you say hi to us every day. Your motivation is always to get some food,â Sarah chimes in from in front of the fridge, laughing when Joel looks at her offended.
âSee? Even a ten year old recognizes the pattern of behavior,â you confirm your findings, laughing as Joel grumbles to himself and pops the last bite of his sandwich in his mouth.
âWell, for your information, both of you, I am here for an entirely different reason than lunch and to see you two.â He crosses his arms in front of his chest, looking between the two of you with a mischievous smile on his face. âWhy donât yâall go look in the living room and then tell me if you wanna keep makinâ fun of Dad?â
Sarah excitedly starts off toward the living room, giddy about the surprise awaiting her. Your brow furrows and lips twist up in curiosity, eyes staying glued to Joel. He laughs and nods to the other room, a bright smile on his face.
âBetter go see, mi amor. Think youâll want to meet him.â Joel winks, your attention being pulled away when you both hear Sarah gasp from the living room.
âOh my gosh! Posey, come here! Aw!â
Thatâs when it registers â the surprise, home in the middle of the day, the smirk, âyouâll want to meet himâ.
âYou didnât,â you breathe out, head snapping back to Joel as he gives you a wide, genuine grin.
âGo! See for yourself.â He rounds the island and grabs your hips from behind, guiding your steps into the living room. Sarahâs giggles fill the room as the fluffy Bernese Mountain puppy stands in her lap and licks at her face. The small dogâs attention is pulled from her and over to you and Joel entering the room, a tiny bark sounding before he scampers over.
âJoel, oh my god, how did youâwhenâoh my godâŚâ You kneel down to scoop up the little one into your arms and cuddle it gently, giving it pets before letting him run around again.
âFound someone who had a litter with their family dogs the day after we talked about it. And arranged to pick him up. They said heâs the energetic one, and that heâs gonna be a big boy. Like a hundred pounds.â
âOh my god, heâs so sweetâŚthank you, J.â You beam up at him, waving him to bend down and steal a kiss, squeezing his shoulder.
Sarahâs playing with your new family dog, tugging with a rope toy as he fights back with his whole little body. âThank you, Dad. Heâs so cute!â
âWhat should we name him?â Joel asks as he lowers himself to the floor next to you, smiling as the puppy runs over. The two rough house, Joel easily flipping him over to scratch at his belly as the dog pants happily.
âAny ideas, Sare?â you ask, looking over at her.
She thinks for a moment before looking up between Joel and you, laughing at the tiny pupâs antics, âWhat about Goose? He just seems like one. Like a silly goose.â
âGoose? I like it, Bug,â Joel confirms, turning to you with a grin, âHow about you, Mari?â
Nodding, you look at the new addition to the family, burning bright with happiness at your peopleâs excitement, âI think Goose is a perfect fit. And now youâre not outnumbered anymore, J. Two girls and two boys in the Miller household.â
Sarah laughs and lays down to cuddle with Goose while Joel moves closer to your side, wrapping an arm around you and kissing your head as he quietly whispers, âHopefully wonât be too long before the boys are outnumbered again.â
âAnd what makes you say it wonât be us girls being outnumbered?â
âCall it fatherâs intuition. Wouldnât know what to do with a little boy, beinâ a dad to another girl would just be second nature. Plus, I would want a mini Mari running around the world.â Joel presses a kiss to your temple before you turn your head, catching his pursed lips with yours sweetly.
âIâd take anything if it means havinâ a little piece of you forever, J.â
third time lucky
Negative.
A single line, bold and brash, stares back at you. Turning the plastic in your hands, you attempt to read it at different angles, the smallest bit of hope lingering for another line to appear â that it was a trick of the light that was causing your disappointment.
To no avail, the blue strip remains unaccompanied in the small window. A sinking feeling fills your body from your toes up. Everything feels heavier, except your lower stomach. That has never felt as empty as it is now.
Heavy footsteps thump a vibration in the floors, but your focus remains on a speck of dust floating in the light past your field of vision. His presence hangs in the bedroom, milling about, unknowing of what you were up to before he came in from mowing the lawn.
âHey, baby, mâgonna take a shower and then weâve got Sarahâs softball game at three. Probably half to leave here around two, her coach asked all the parents to be thirty minutes early for some reasonâŚâ Joelâs voice fades in your head as your thoughts start to yell, scream, fight, taunt inside of your mind.
A hard swallow pops your ears, the ringing in them growing louder as your mind begins to wander. The test is left discarded on the bathroom counter, with no heart yet to throw it in the garbage where the others have ended up. Your bare feet shuffle against the rug as you seek out solace under covers, even in the ninety-plus-degree heat. The springs of the mattress shift under your weight, lying on your side facing the opposite side of the bed that lays empty right now. The coverlet is pulled up over you, curling your fingers at the hem tightly, white knuckle grip to release some of the tension that has taken over your mind. You want to scream, cry, yell, question â but what you want most of all is to be able.
Why arenât you able? Why canât you do what your body is made to do, what it begs for, what it reminds you that youâve failed at every month?
Joel stands in observation of you, careful distance, one hand lifting before he drops it. He can guess what this is about. What youâve left behind in the en-suite. But to confirm his suspicions, he quietly walks into the tiled room, leaving his clean clothes on the counter while he picks up the test.
Negative.
His body sinks, toes up to his head, but with a gaping, empty feeling in his chest. Thereâs so much room left in his heart, room he is eager to fill with another part of you, another love, another soul to protect. Now, though, all of his emptiness is filled with an ache for you. Youâve been dreaming out loud for a year now, wonderings and visions shared with him late nights and early mornings â Will they have his eyes? You hope so, so that they look like their sister. Whoâs ears would they have? What quirks will they pick up from both of you? Who will they grow up to be? How will we be able to contain our love for both of our kids?
Our kids. Joel remembers that night; after you said that, he couldnât hold himself back, couldnât contain his love for you. No hesitation that his own was yours now, too. All he wanted was to give you another, to see your belly grow and your smile brighten and your skin glow. He was begging for whatever power was in the universe for that time to take, for both of you to be gifted with what you wished for so often, so deeply.
Desperation. Wavering confidence. Sorrow, worry, dwindling hope. He saw it all over you, time after time when the single line appeared on the plastic sticks.
You and Joel had been trying for a year. A long year. Maybe your desire was too strong, too overpowering. But shouldnât that be a sign of your love? For each other, for your family? All he wants to do is give you the life youâve wished for. And yes, all youâve said you want is a life with him, but anyone who meets you would be able to tell you are meant for a nurturing life. Meant for motherhood.
It was already natural for you, taking a ten-year-old in stride, making her into your best friend â making her a priority over Joel most of the time. He knew it didnât matter to you that she wasnât yours, biologically speaking, but he canât help but want to give you a child that is part you. How badly he wants another piece of you in the world, all of your goodness packaged into the purest soul.
Resigning with a sigh, he sets the test down on the cool countertop and exits the bathroom, a slow stride over to your lying form. Crumpled under covers. With a soft groan, he lowers himself to his knees with cracks popping his joints. His age is starting to show the closer he gets to forty and the more hours he works in the summer weather, another looming factor for him â heâs only known being a young dad. If you two have to wait, what would it be like to be nearly sixty when your kid graduates high school?
Shaking the superficial concerns from his head, his wide palm glides along the quilted fabric draped over your side. He rests his chin on his opposite arm, laying against the mattress close to your pillow. At the coax of his touch, you turn over to face him. Lips pursed in a frown, dried watery streaks being washed anew with your fresh tears, fat and rolling down your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose. They drip off of your skin, dotting and darkening the fabric of the pillowcase underneath you.
Joel leans in, brushing your hair from your face and pressing his lips to your forehead for a lingering kiss. A deep breath draws the smell of your shampoo into his nose, down deep into his lungs where it soothes his aching chest.
âMari, sweet girl, I know itâs hard. I know we want it so bad, but thereâs always another option,â he speaks softly, kindly, delicately, âWe can go to that fertility specialist your doctor recommended. I promise, mi amor, weâll have a baby together.â
He means it, and you can tell he means it. Ever since you had been back together, ever since he confessed his feelings for you â years ago now â he hasnât made an empty promise. From tiny little things like a pledge to stop on the way home for your favorite ice cream, going to three different stores and adding nearly an hour to his day simply to show up with it for you, to larger, grander oaths, his wedding vows, the promise of building a beautiful life with you.
Emotion is thick in your throat as you attempt to vocalize your concerns. They keep you up at night, with Joelâs warm and expansive hand resting on your stomach right above your womb as he sleeps soundly. He wants it clearly as much as you do; you can feel it each time youâve tried. How badly he wants to provide this for you.
Is he having the same thoughts as you? Does he wonder if somethingâs âwrongâ with you?
âI wanna be able to do it. Why canât I do it on my own?â The sound of your meek voice shatters his heart and he shakes his head back and forth, adamant in shutting down the thoughts.
Tugging the covers down, Joelâs hands find your exposed skin, sliding across with a clammy touch from his labor outside. And nerves, too, youâd guess. Moving from his knees on the floor next to the bed, he finds a spot sitting at your side and shifts you to lay on your back. Opening up to him. Warmth rests over your womb, blanket pulled down to the tops of your thighs while his thumb brushes at your stomach, catching on the fabric of your shirt.
âNoâoh, mi Mariposa, you donât even know if it would be you with an issue. Very well could be me. Maybe breathinâ all the paint fumes at work killed mâlittle swimmers.â He breathes a small laugh through his nose, attempting to lighten the mood.
Your hands fly up to your face, muffling your voice, âOh, god, donât say that. I wanna have your baby, not some sperm donors.â
His hand coasts up your torso, over to your side to wrap around your rib cage, feeling your breaths as his fingertips lightly tickle the spot, âThat was supposed to make you laugh, sweet girl.âÂ
Hands falling away from your face, your brow pinches together and your frown deepens. About to make a retort, your mouth open, Joel skates the fingertips of both his hands up and down your sides, alternated on each side of you to make it harder to catch his wrists. Laughter bubbles up from your chest, your frown morphing into a flashing smile before youâre calling for a surrender in between gasping breaths.
Relenting, his hands stop, settling at the curve of your waist. He leans over you, nudging his nose against yours before pressing a ghosting kiss to your lips. A small grin, hopeful and reassuring, with a tinge of worry flickering in his irises, barely there before his smile reaches his eyes, âItâll happen for us, Mari baby. Why donât we say, one last go before lookinâ into the doctors? Weâll do all the things, track whatever we need to track. Iâll drop whatever I need to come home and put a baby in you.â
Joel wiggles his eyebrows, playful smirk crossing his expression. You roll your eyes under him, pushing an accusing finger into his chest, âLike you donât already do that. I could call you in the middle of work and just go âHey, Jâ and youâre in the truck on your way home.â
âThatâs right, Mari. As it should be. Yâknow what they say â happy wife, happy life.â Another kiss to your lips, this one a bit more savoring. âWhat dâya say, mi amor? One more go?â
âOkay, yeah. One more go.â
Butterflies kick up in your stomach when you hear the low rumble of Joelâs truck cut, heavy door swinging closed and quick strides following. The front door opens after a short jingle of keys, shutting behind him with the slide of the lock back into place. Distant grumbles of his make you laugh, his frustrations with his work boots floating upstairs to where youâre sitting on the edge of your bed, leaning back on your hands. Clad in only your bra and panties, you work your bottom lip between your teeth as anticipation builds with each of Joelâs footsteps up the carpeted stairs.
You both only have the afternoon â less than an hour of your afternoon, actually â to make your last attempt. Already having taken advantage of the window in your cycle twice, the peak day of your ovulation fell, of course, during the busiest time of year for Miller Construction. Summer has come to a close, and now people have picked up their home improvements to start nesting for the winter; a craving youâve been having yourself, desperate to make your home larger and livelier by one more. Joel has snuck away for a moment that you two have alone, and youâve told the couple you nanny for that you have an immovable appointment for today.
Pretty sure the only thing that will be immovable today will be you once Joelâs hour is up.
 âMari? Mi amor?â he calls out and you chuckle softly at the boyish excitement in his voice.
âIn the bedroom, J!â
Joel rounds the doorway into your shared room, stopping a handful of steps past the threshold when he registers the sight of you. He hums a low moan, licking his lips as his eyes devour your lacy undergarments, âMierda, mi esposa, estĂĄs tratando de matarme? (Shit, my wife, are you trying to kill me?) You look so fucking beautiful, darlinâ.â
A low whistle leaves his lips as he stalks closer, eyes rake over your form as you present your primped self for his taking.
âYou get all pretty for me, sweet girl? I like thisâŚâ he rasps as heâs within armâs reach now, stretching a hand out to toy with the strap of your bra and snapping it against your skin sharply.
âWanted to look pretty when you fill me up, J.â One curl of his finger under your chin draws you to sit up straight, tilting your head back to look at Joel towering over you.
âGood girl,â he praises, a glint of excitement in his eyes, âYou want me to fill up your sweet little cunt, Mariposa? Want me to give you a baby? Tell me.â
âYes,â you breathe out shakily, eyelids fluttering closed as his hands trail lightly across your exposed skin, ghosting everywhere you need him most.
âMore, sweetheart. Dime. Dime cuĂĄnto lo deseas. Suplicar por ello. (Tell me. Tell me how badly you want it. Beg for it.)â His instructions float through your head, only keywords translating in while Joel leaves over you, lips pressing feather-light kisses along your neck, across your chest.
âI need it, Joel. Need you so fucking bad, I wanna have your baby. Want you to make me a mom, fill me up as many times as it takes until we get our babyâŚplease, JâŚâ As if the taste of you wasnât enough to do him in, the wild, fervent look in your eyes intrigues him beyond. Hearing the words from your lips, directed to him, heâs fucking aching. He was growing hard on his way over here, the thoughts swimming through his mind of you laid out and ready for him to take delegating his blood supply to rush down below his belt.
He needs you, but first, he needs to see you unraveling underneath him only from his fingers.
âDonât worry your pretty little mind, Mari. Mâgonna take care of you. Iâll make sure this one takes. Letâs call it third time lucky this summer.âÂ
He shoots you a wink, your mouth parting to respond. Before you can let any breath escape, his lips are crashing with yours. Heavy, heady, and so fucking hot it spirals your thoughts into nothing. His tongue melts with yours, the taste of his black coffee and the donut he must have eaten at work this morning tingling your taste buds. Sweat sticks to his skin when your hands rest at the sides of his neck, falling backwards as he climbs over you. He smells of wood shavings, freshly mowed grass, and hard work â calloused hands gliding along your body and feeling the softest of scratches of his blue collar hands.
âJoel, need you â please.â Itâs more of a whine than a begging whimper, rising frustration levels from his lack of touch in the place you need and want him the most.Â
Your cunt is desperate, dripping down your folds and surely soaking the sheets. A quick jerk of your hips attempts to brush against him, to catch any relief for the need building low in your stomach. A large palm presses your lower half back against the mattress, the other hand pushing your leg to the side to open you up further for him. A knuckle brushes your clit, grazing up and down your seam through your soaked panties. Your husband clicks his tongue as he shakes his head at you, patronizing tone slick in his voice.
âDarlinâ, I wanna take every second of my time with you. Are you gonna let me? Gonna let me get your cunt squeezing my fingers? Gonna let me fill you up, mi amor?â he asks, as if you wouldnât say yes to all of those requests and he knows it. Nodding, a desperate yes exhaled when he applies more pressure with his finger against your clit, rubbing slow circles. âGood girl. Siempre tan bueno para mĂ. (Always so good for me.)â
Joel folds over your, taking one of your perked nipples into his mouth through your bra and sucking. His tongue flattens against the cup before heâs pulling at the nub with his teeth. The material is darkened where his mouth was when he grows a bit more needy, grabbing at the straps and yanking the bra to rest at your midsection. You slip your arms out of the straps and he pushes you further onto the bed by the back of your thighs, stripping your panties off and settling on his knees.
Pressure forms against your clit from two of his fingers, slow circles dragging a moan from your throat. Joel smirks, satisfied with the way you squirm under him, trying and failing to get more from his hands. Before you can vocalize a whine, Joel is over you again, bringing his attention to your now bare breast while the circles continue. Hot, humid kisses are littered on the soft skin, happy hums rolling from Joelâs chest. He pulls his head up, looking down at your chest with a half grin and his dimple on display.
âYouâre gonna get so soft and swollen everywhere, Mariposa. Round belly, huge titsâcanât wait to play with âem.â His grin widens, boyish and brazen with the glee that the fact fills him with. âYou gonna let me, baby? Gonna let me make your sore tits feel better with my mouth?â
His question goes unanswered as his mouth attaches to one of your nipples, sucking and flattening his tongue as he nurses it. Pulling away with a pop, he mimics the same on the other side, the intensity of his suckling along with his fingers rubbing faster against your clit â even slipping down to tease at your entrance â has you wiggling under him, desperation notching up your spine.
âJoel, please,â you plead, choking on your breath when he pulls the bud of your breast between his teeth, a low growling sound rumbling from his throat.Â
Two of his thick fingers push into your dripping cunt, a relieved moan echoing against the walls of the bedroom. Curling up into your spongy walls, they thrust quickly and pet at the certain spot inside of you. Joelâs mouth is still at your chest, his hunger feeding itself on the taste of your skin.
âFuck, Mari, gonna break my fucking fingers off. So fucking tight.â
A distraught whimper crawls from your chest, breaths heaving as your walls clench around his quick-paced fingers. You gasp when he slips a third one in, hooking them up. Despite the stretch, you still feel an emptiness. All you want is his cock inside of you, spilling into you and leaving you to grow fuller with his baby. The thoughts of him above you, fucking it all deeper into you to reach your womb, drive you over the edge. The tips of his fingers press against that spot inside of you, his warm mouth hanging open at your tit while his eyes watch you come undone. Writhing and walls pulsing around his fingers, his name falls from your mouth as you choke out moans and your vision grows dark.
âThatâs it, Mari baby, fuck,â Joel works you through the orgasm before his fingers leave you and he sits back on his haunches. Sucking his digits clean of your slick and come, the other hand rubs your thigh gently before he coos down at you, âThat was a big one, wasnât it? Feel good?â
Still coming down from it all, your body feels liquidity, taking whatever form Joel is molding you into right now after heâs stripped himself bare. One hand slips under you, unclasping your bra and tugging it away from your torso, leaving you as naked as him. His eyes drink in your body while his grip holds your calves, chuckling darkly when you finally breathe out a response, âI feelâŚlike I need you to put a baby in me.â
âCualquier cosa para usted, mi esposa. Vas a estar tan lleno de mĂ. Te encanta la sensaciĂłn de mi mecos dentro de ti, Âżverdad? (Anything for you, my wife. You're going to be so full of me. You love the feeling of my cum inside of you, don't you?)â Your head rolls with a nod, agreeing to anything Joel says in the moment, still hazy from how hard heâd made you come moments ago. Half-lidded eyes watch as he licks his fingers, stroking his cock a few times with a quiet sigh. Thatâs something you could watch all day â Joelâs pleasure. And here underneath him, you have the perfect view, and the perfect position to be used for it.
Fully handing over control to him, his hands tug you up so your ass sits on his thighs while heâs on his knees. Fingertips skate along the distance of your legs, grabbing at your calves to rest them on his broad shoulders. Even the slightest shift forward from his hips stretches you wide, a delicious ache creating a craving for more.
âTell me how bad you want it, Mari, tell me how much you wanna have my baby.â
Joelâs gripping his length, rubbing his tip through your wet folds. The notches against your clit quiver the already stretched muscles in your thighs, whines replacing words coming out of your mouth.
âTell me, or I wonât give you what you want, mi amor.â
âI want it so bad, J. I wanna feel you fuck me so full of you, and I donât want that feeling to leave. I feel like thereâs an emptiness and only you can fill it, I want your baby. Wanna have everyone know how good I am for you, carrying your baby like you want me to. I wanna have a part of you forever,â you gasp out the last word, Joelâs cock inching into you. Muscle memory takes over, your whole body relaxing with the knowledge that heâll take care of you â heâll always take care of you.
Joel bottoms out easily, filling you to the hilt before he pauses to take a breath. His eyes meet yours and he smiles, sweet and sincere, while holding your shins, âI fucking love you, mi Mariposa. Wanna give you a babyâŚâ
âPleasepleasepleaseââ You donât know if youâre begging more for him to give you what you want or to move his hips, but in the end, you get both.Â
Joel starts out slow, shallow thrusts keeping him inside of you. Grunts from the controlled movements fill the room, your small whimpers following each noise he makes. The sound of him fucking into your cunt captures his attention, gaze zeroed in on where you two meet. Watching the stretch of your tight pussy around his cock, he feels the burning desire for more. To watch you take it deeper, harder.
The next snap of his hips is just that - smacking his skin against your ass before he adjusts, laying you back completely on the mattress and leaning over you. Your legs are still hooked over his shoulders, the burning of your muscles now straining your hamstrings and glutes. His entire body folds you, his head hovering over yours as he fucks into you further. The tip of his cock kisses your womb, the force of his thrusts driving your hips open more for him.
âGonna â fuck â gonna make you a momma, Mariposa. That what you want? Get fucked so well, be so full of me that we make a baby? Everybodyâs gonna know I treat my wife right. With your round bellyâŚswollenâahâswollen tits. Gonna be so beautiful, and so fucking sensitive everywhere.â
His words only add onto the feeling of his thick cock filling you up, nearly verging on too far and too much. Moans exhale on your lips, his name repeated like a chant with each harsh snap of him into you. Your hands scramble for purchase as his sheer power drives you up the mattress, sheets scratching against your bare back. One set of fingers dig into the meaty flesh of his shoulder, nails pressing crescent shapes like an iron-hot branding.
Above you, Joel studies how your mouth has fallen open, thoughts completely left your mind with how cockdrunk you are. He gingerly grips your chin, holding it to face him and commanding your eyes to his as he pants heavily.
âWhat dâyou wanna make me, baby?â Itâs only met with the sounds of his cock dragging in and out of you, the slap of skin as you gasp under him. âCâmon, Mari baby, use your words.â
âA daddy,â you breathe out, your opposite hand combing into his messy curls and gripping tight.
âSay it again. Dime.â Not thinking it was possible, Joel pushes you further, hitting into you harder with each thrust nudging his tip toward your cervix. You might only leave this afternoon with soreness, but you continued to hold out hope for a baby to be the well-worth prize for how youâre going to feel tomorrow.
âA daddy!â
âDime. Dime. Dime,â he commands and you listen, writhing under him as he hacks away at your shared resolve, throwing you closer and closer to the edge.
âDaddy â oh, fuck, a daddy. Wanna make you a daddy!â Youâre yelling at this point, sobs of pleasure wracking your body and you thank god for a split second that the two of you are home alone in the middle of the work day. Surely the whole block might be hearing all of your wanton sounds.
âGod, I could get used to you calling me that, Mari baby,â Joel groans and throws his head back, bearing his teeth as he punches his hips into your clenching pussy, the telltale sign that youâre close.
âCâmon, mi amor, give it to me. Come for me and Iâll let your fucking pussy milk me for every last drop. Thatâs what you want, right? Gotta fill you up and make a baby for my Mari baby.â Heâs rambling as you reach your peak, toes curling and coming even harder than your first one this afternoon.Â
A near scream pulls itself from as deep as your gut, the sound as if you were in more pain than the absolute pleasure you feel. Your grip on his hair tightens, drawing him down for a messy kiss as you mumble against his lips.
âPlease gimme a baby, J. Need it all inside of me, please. Come for me, mi esposo.âÂ
The name sends goosebumps across his shoulders and trickles down his spine before heâs barking your name once and spilling into you, painting your walls with each rope. He takes a moment to breathe before he gently presses his hips in a few short thrusts, fucking his spend as far into you as possible.
Joel collapses against your torso, no other efforts exerted to move away. Delicate, nimble touches brush the hair from his sweaty forehead, rubbing his shoulders as he hums contently.
âFuck, baby, might just have to stay inside. Keep you plugged up so I can stay here all day with you.â Quiet, breathless laughter leaves your lips as you shake your head, tracing along his jaw before he turns his head to press his lips into your tummy.
âCanât wait for you to be a momma. Gonna be the best one ever, yâalready are. Love you so much.â
The two of you lay like that for what feels like hours, only to be reminded of Joelâs limited schedule when his cell starts ringing from downstairs. Getting up with a groan, he slips out of you and lifts your hips, stuffing a pillow or two underneath them to keep your lower half elevated. You roll your eyes at the superstitious gesture, gasping when his fingers push into you once more to put his leaking come back into where it belongs.
âGotta make sure it takes, pretty girl. Wanna see you get all round with my baby in you. Everybodyâll know how good I am to you, huh? Pumping you full of me so much we made a new fucking lifeâŚbetter stay like this until I get home again, Mari baby. Wanna make sure those lil swimmers get all the help they can get.â
âMmâŚâ you hum, hands grabbing for him to lean over you again. Sneaking a kiss, you pull away to whisper to him with a grin on your lips, âBetter get back to workâŚdaddy.â
He snorts out a laugh, beaming a bright smile as mischief glimmers in his eyes, âMal. Mala chica. (Bad. Bad girl.)â
Three days late. Youâve been tracking your cycle like a mad woman, ticking off days in the notebook next to your bed, and now youâre officially three days late. Joel and you had agreed to wait a few days after you expected your period, hopeful that the extra time meant a more accurate, and desired, result.
The kitchen timer sitting on Joelâs side of the bed ticks away while you side on the edge of the bed. Tapping your fingers against your thighs, bare skin against your fingertips from the high hem of your denim shorts. Joel paces the room, eyes focused a thousand yards ahead. Anxiety and anticipation had been plaguing both of you all day, work slugging by minute by minute, second by second. Joel had left the jobsite as soon as was acceptable, leaving Tommy to wrap up, and swung by the pharmacy to pick up a new box of tests. Your task for the day was to chug water, or any liquid, all afternoon â by the time Joel was one foot through the door, you were ready to burst. Snatching the bag of tests out of his hand, you ran to the bathroom to pee in a plastic disposable cup and stick at least three tests in.
Now, you two are waiting for more seconds and minutes to tick by, added to the tally of the entire day. As youâre about to stand and stop Joel from burning treads in the area rug from walking his tight circles, a trill of a bell vibrating demands your attention. Turning off the noise in a flash, you stand and cross the room to where your husband is now frozen in place. A gentle touch to his cheek, his eyelids flutter close and he takes a long exhale before opening them again.
âReady?â you ask, uncertainty pitching your voice up.
A minute nod, one shake of his chin, Joelâs hand finds the small of your back as he responds, âReady, mi amor.â
His hand guides you into the bathroom, and a handful of steps from the three tests laid out on the counter, you turn around, panic twisting your expression. Joel stumbles to stop his collision with you, large palms grabbing onto your biceps to catch himself.
âMâscared, JâŚâ Your voice is meek, cracking with emotion. This is the last shot you gave yourselves, whatever is laid on the counter either means unbridled joy or a long road of poking and prodding in countless doctorsâ offices.
The warmth of his hands rubbing your arms and the press of his lips to your forehead coax you to relax, to take deep breaths, âI know, Mari baby, I would be lyinâ if I said I wasnât scared too. But no matter what is on those tests, weâre in it together, right sweet girl?â
His index finger hooks under your chin to draw your attention up to his face, a small smile filled with love and reassurance stretching his lips.
âAlways in it together, J.â You take another deep breath, turning around and nodding shortly, âOkay, now mâready.â
âThatâs my girl,â he mumbles before heâs following right behind you again, the two of you pressing yourselves to each other against the counter. Joel has an iron grip on your hips, nerves manifesting in the squeezes of his hands. Shaking fingers turn over each test before picking them all up to your lines of vision.
Two lines. Two bold lines screaming at both of you, across all three tests.
Positive.
Positive. Youâre pregnant. You and Joel are having a baby.
âHoly shitâŚâ Joel exhales behind you, smile creeping into his voice. Somehow, his grip gets even tighter as he turns you around, âHoly shit! Youâre pregnant, Mari. Weâre havinâ a baby! Youâre gonna be a momma!â
Giddiness overcomes both of you, happy and disbelieving laughter while you hold each other in a tight embrace. Joel litters kisses around your face, catching your lips last â all teeth and tight lipped from your matching grins.
âYouâre gonna be a dad again, howâs that feel?â
âLike I won the damn lottery, mi amor.â
Another kiss, supple and heavy. Joel pulls away first and shakes his head, pressing his forehead to yours, âI love you so fucking much, Mari.â
âI love you too, J.â
âYou ready to go, Sare?â you ask, standing next to her seat at the kitchen table where sheâs working away at her homework, reaching a hand out to play with her curls. She smiles and nods, writing down one last answer to a question on her worksheet before she lays her pencil down and stands up, rushing over toward the door.
âJust gotta get my shoes on!â she calls out, and you smile, shaking your head.
âTake your time, sweet pea! God knows itâs gonna take me longer to walk over to the door.â Your joke falls on deaf ears of your husband, who stands at the kitchen island and rolls his eyes before heâs crossing the room over to you. Within armâs length, his hands cup the bottom of your large belly, leaning in for a sweet peck.
âNobody cares if you move slow. Better to be careful thanââ
âCareless, yes, I know. I think those might be our babyâs first words since they hear them so much from their dad,â you tease and he shrugs, kissing you again while his touch wanders across the flannel of his that youâre sporting, too tired to buy more maternity clothes that youâll grow out of and opting for his closet every morning.
âJusâ looking out for my girls. All three of âem.â He beams proudly, brown eyes shining brightly before he turns you in his arms, accompanying you to the front door where your near-teenager is waiting. Ever the sweetheart she is, sheâs got your purse slung on her shoulder, car keys in hand to pass off to you. You thank her quietly, turning back to Joel as he looks between the two of you.
âAlright, have fun with your girlsâ day. And call if you need anything â either of you. Iâll be waitinâ here for ya.â Joel smooths down Sarahâs hair before kissing the crown of her head; she squirms away, the teenage attitude rearing its head in some early moments, especially with her dad. Thereâs less patience for him, which you completely understand as a teenage girl once yourself. He huffs out a sigh as she slips out the door, heading down the front path toward your car.
âHey, sânothing. Teenage girl things. She loves you, and youâre the best dad.â A hand on his cheek coaxes him down to your lips, a supple kiss exchanged before he pulls away and bends to kiss the top of your belly.
âBye, my little June Bug.â He stands upright again and steals another kiss, mumbling, âAnd bye, mi Mariposa. Drive safe, let me know if you need anything while youâre out. I love you.â
âWe love you too. And mâspeaking for the moody one, too.â Joel chuckles and rubs your bump once more before sending you on your way, watching and waving from the door as yâall drive away.
The plan for today had come about when you started to notice Sarah growing quieter, retreating to her room more often after family dinners and denying the chance at movie night some days. Joel had noticed too, but was a bit nervous to broach it with her, not wanting to make her feel bad about being more independent.
Your relationship with her though was much different to Joelâs. There was the foundation of your caretaking role with her, much more of a friend with authority when it was only you two before you were anything close to a parental figure. More open and, well, you could relate more to what she was going through. She confided in you first about girls at school being catty, about her growing crushes on boys in her grade. And this year, only a month after your due date, she will officially become a teenager. It was a strange time in any girlâs life, full of growing pains.
And on top of all of that, add on a new baby arriving. Attentions drawn elsewhere, priorities shifted to preparing for the baby. Sarah never fell to the backburner in your minds, but you didnât know how she was feeling. Guessing by her quiet actions, you could tell she was feeling left out but didnât want to stir up trouble.
Always the sweet girl. And you knew how that was.
So, youâd asked her for a girlsâ day, excluding her dad from the fun and giving both of you some time with each other to feel like it was years before. It was all about Sarah today, no mentions of baby â no buying diapers or supplies or clothes. A promise made to yourself to make Sarah feel special, because that is exactly what she was. The baby on the way may be your first biological child, but nothing can compare to the unique bond that you have with your Sare Bear.
The day was spent waddling throughout the mall, helping her pick out new outfits and shoes for the end of the school year. Collecting a haul, you two stopped off for lunch and a trip to the nail salon before you finally made your way back home in the evening. Sarah was smiling brightly in the passenger seat, joking around with you and eagerly telling you all about the latest school drama. Your heart was about to burst with how much sheâd come out of her shell again all day, even wanting to show off her new things to her dad when you both got back.
In the living room, Joel greets you two from the couch, eyes widening and a low whistle leaving his lips when he sees the damage done, âQuite some shoppinâ there, Bug. Yâall buy out the whole store?â
You wave him off and encourage Sarah to show off her haul, walking over to settle onto the sofa next to Joel. The younger Miller excitedly starts pulling out pieces and showcasing them, excitedly telling her dad exactly where she plans to wear them. His hand rests on your leg, attention completely focused on his daughter in front of him, squeezing you gently when she gets particularly worked up over something. You can tell he feels what you were in the car, heart bursting that she seems like herself again after a day spent with you.
âThatâs nice, Sare Bear. I like the color,â Joel comments on the last shirt Sarah holds up, her smile still beaming as she tosses it back into the bag.
âThanks, Mom actually picked it out! I thought it would be fun to have for camp this year, since Iâm gonna start the counselor training programâŚâ Her voice trails off as Joel listens intently. You, on the other hand, take deep breaths to hold it together, the simple moniker rolling off of Sarahâs tongue so naturally. Your heartbeat thumps in your chest, and baby Miller kicks her feet against your tummy â equally as excited.
You manage to keep it calm while Sarah recaps the rest of the day before she gathers up her shopping bags to take to her room. As sheâs leaving the room, sheâs quick to run over and give you a hug, leaning down to meet you where you sit on the couch. Your belly sticks out between the two of you, but regardless you pull her into a tight squeeze as she says thank you. Her curls bounce as she scampers off upstairs, the quiet sounds of her feet in the hallway queuing your watery eyes to overflow and for your nose to sniffle. Joel is grinning brightly next to you, pulling you into his lap and holding you against him as he wipes the few happy tears away.
âShe called me MomâŚâ you whisper to your husband, afraid to admit it any louder as if it would disappear.
Joel presses his forehead against yours, a sweet kiss against your lips before he whispers back, âYou have no idea how happy it makes me to know she feels that way about you.â
âI justâŚI feel so lucky. And maybe itâs hormones, but oh my god, I canât stop blubbering. Iâm a mom.â
âYouâre the best mom. Have been to Sarah since she met you, and youâre going to be the best mom to our little one on the way.â
June 21st, 2009.
The first day of summer.
Itâs the first day of summer and youâre stuck inside. Not at home, no, youâre currently propped up in a hospital bed with your legs in stir-ups, breathing in between contractions. Exhaustion weighs on your body, a full hour passing of you pushing in time with the pain in your abdomen that radiates all over. Sweat sticks your hair to your forehead and Joel sitting next to you brushes it out of the way. His other hand is limp in yours, ready to be squeezed with a vice grip whenever you need to push. Joel leans over you in level with your head, lathering on encouragements.
âYou got this, Mari.â
âSo strong, baby. You can do it.â
âThank you, mi amor, thank you thank you thank you.â
The last one comes after a string of complaints against him doing this to you â despite you both knowing you begged for it nine months prior â and for having such a big head in his own baby photos that he had to have passed down to the baby.
Another wave kicks in, your doctor and nurses coaching you to give another final push. Putting every last bit of your energy behind the flex of your muscles, groaning out with pain and frustration before a piercing cry fills the room. Heavy, tiny sobs ring in your ears.
âYou did it, baby, mâso proud of you. Our little girl,â Joel says in awe, glancing between you and where the doctor holds your little baby girl, summoning Dad over to cut the cord.Â
Sheâs taken away to be cleaned up and Joel returns to your side, ready to help you attentively through the afterbirth. You wave him off, begging him to go keep an eye on your little girl. Once sheâs clean enough, the nurses lay her on your bare chest, the sight of her tiny fingers and toes bringing about your own cries. Your hands hold her there, delicate touches brushing against her soft skin and her damp but full head of dark brown hair.
The rest of the process is painful but smoother, shorter. Before you know it, all tests are done and Joel is next to the bed again, wiping a damp cloth across your forehead.
A rush of adrenaline, pure unfiltered need and excitement to meet your daughter keeps you awake, sitting up carefully as you accept her into your arms from your husband whoâs wearing the biggest smile. He sits on the edge of the bed, hand on your leg as you study the features on her small face.
âSheâs perfect, isnât she, Mari? Looks like her momma.â
You beam, shaking your head as you place a fingertip against her nose, âSee, I think she looks like her daddy. Already got the grumpy brow.â
Both of you laugh, your unbridled attention on the tiny bundle in your arms as you gush over her for minutes longer. Joel rubs your leg, drawing your eyes up to him as he asks, âSo you think we picked a good name?â
âI think we picked a perfect name. Our âSâ girls,â you grin at him before looking down at your little girl, âSkye Isla Miller. I think it suits her perfectly.â
A bit more time is spent between only the two of you and Skye before youâre itching to see your eldest, and for her to meet her little sister. Joel retreats to where Sarahâs in the waiting area with Tommy and Maria, whoâs now three months pregnant herself, waving her to come back with him. She nervously enters the room, quiet as a mouse until you reassure her with a smile and welcome her to sit in the bed next to you.
Joel makes the introductions, voice thick with emotion as he stands over his three girls, watching as his first little one meets his second, âSarah Elena, this is your baby sister, Skye Isla.â
Sarah quietly asks permission to hold her; you lay Skye in her arms carefully, teaching her how to support her head and where to avoid her soft spot. Sarah picks up on it like a natural, adjusting her little sister when she fusses a bit, finally settling into a new set of familiar hands.
âDad said you did a really good job, Mom. With everything today. Sâpretty cool that you brought a whole person into the worldâŚâ Sarah glances over at you with a shy smile before addressing both you and Joel, âMâreally happy sheâs here.â
âYouâre gonna be a great big sister, Bug,â Joel beams with pride as he squeezes her shoulder, leaning over to press a kiss to the crown of your head. He hums as he looks over you three, âGot my Mariposa, my Bug, and my little June Bug. Mi maripositas. Donât think anything could beat seeing my three girls altogether finally.â
You find yourself observing your family from afar, listening with muffled ears as Joel and Sarah chat about who Skye got what features from. Cheeks aching from smiling, you canât help but think that this summer was off to the most wonderful start, and that every summer after was only going to get better.Â
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Things I Adore About Diamond Dog Trent (in Chronological Order):
Intense confusion over Beard barking that becomes Roy scaring the shit out of him (again) as he slams the door
"Oh, I'm in." IMMEDIATE. NO HESITATION. 100% COMMITMENT. Keep in mind that he's just been told they share their "most initiate thoughts, feelings and experiences" like oh, I don't know... the fact that you're gay? But Trent is Ted's The Lasso Way's #1 Fanboy so he's feeling safe and validated, baby!!
This is very much enhanced by the return of the rainbow mug
30 seconds into his new membership and Trent has gotten used to the barking enough that he can manage an awkward little wave of acknowledgement. 10/10 very cute
Subtle eye-narrowing of judgment at Ted right after Beard's "Unbelievable." They really are on the same wavelength this episode I'm digging it
"Can I just talk whenever?" OH I'M SORRY, IS TRENT "BRINGING THE HEAT" CRIMM POLITELY REQUESTING PERMISSION TO ASK POINTED, PERSONAL QUESTIONS? We love us some character development, yes we do
Teeny tiny smile when Higgins agrees with him. He's! So! Proud! Of! Himself! And he should be!!
Copying Beard's pointing. It reminds me of him subtly flipping Jamie off but also kinda pretending like it's a coincidence. Trent wants to be included so, so badly and he's someone who displays that by mimicking the actions of those around him. Something, something, Isaac's study of body language
The fact that for once Trent isn't holding his notebook and doesn't stop to grab it. He has a good handle now on what can and cannot go into his book. "Don't print that" is a running gag he no longer needs
A more meta-y take, but I love that Trent's first meeting is the perfect example of what the Diamond Dogs are meant to be accomplishing. It's not just a place to vent or get platitudes (though it's that too), but rather to receive the honest, sometimes hard-hitting advice so you can make better and more informed decisions. Ted went in looking for sympathy and got a doozy of a wake-up call instead, which I think highlights the group's purpose for Trent far better than many other meetings might have
You can see Trent open his mouth a little bit while the others are howling like he wants to join in (because he does HE DOES) but doesn't quite have the courage yet. It's only when the others quiet down - when he's not 'imposing' on 'their' thing - that he lets out that little *woof!* of his own
The woof. Yes, that gets its own bullet point
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