#so like ............. idk
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I think if I met a real person who read my tumblr posts I’d die
#obviously I know everyone who sees this is real#it’s just weird cause you’re probably like#American#or European#like on the American continent or the European continent#and neither of those places are real to me#so like idk#I thought homecoming was made up#and winter christmases#until I was like nine#ellieoughposting
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Im making an Angel obey me oc but idk what to name her :(
I was thinking naming her after a woman from the Bible but I’m not sure :( or naming her a variation of seraphim (bc that’s what she is) 😭😭 but Idkkk
#cause the obey me characters reference either a demon or like biblical characters#so like idk#I think demon ocs r easier cause you just pick a demon#but like 😭 ángel ocs???? I’m pretty sure like none of them have actual names unless it’s the main archangels#im pretty sure luke is named after the gospel of Luke and Simeon after like. the guy.#so idk#whateverrr#idk if any of this makes sense#💛! poll time#💛! Z and Obey me
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do i write a lynthia heartstopper au yes or no
#bc like. i feel like it makes sense in my head#do i currently have a multi chapter fic i don’t know how to write? yeah. yeah i do.#but like currently about to renter my heartstopper hyper fixation (i kinda of already have)#so like idk#bonk thoughts#lynthia#grease rise of the pink ladies#rotpl#heartstopper
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Lolol well that was short-lived 😭😭
Usually those posts survive under the read more, but I guess they’re not safe there either 😭😭😭
Sorry y’all, my last post was sniped
Edit: We found a workaround loool
#my post#I guess I have to crop everything idk#might not post content like that here anymore 😭#but even x. formerly known as twitter sucks major ass aaah#so like idk
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; gonna go explore the Harry Potter fandom tag on Ao3 for ( surprisingly ) the first time because this fandom keeps grabbing me by the leg and dragging me down !!
#harry potter#Ao3#fanfiction#shitpost#Kinda#Idk why i hear screams already#☹️#I asked on tiktok if I should do this#And got like 50 responses saying “ NO NO !!! 😟 ”#And another 50 saying “ it's a canon event. 🦅 ”#So like idk#how to feel#???#wish me luck ig#💪💪💪
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thinking of making a bsd oc do yall think i should do it
#🔮rambles~#bsd#i mean....#ive been thinking of making a bsd rp blog honestly but im waiting for finals to get over#so like idk#but i start with an oc maybe....
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I think the reason I enjoy Chinese webnovels is because they’re literature (the best form of storytelling) that isn’t bound by the rules of the three act structure and have more of the arc structure used in long-running manga. Which when done right is really fun.
(TikTok showed me too many “writing advice” videos a while ago where they were talking about how to properly utilize the three act structure and it made me realize that limiting yourself to that format has been to the detriment of so many otherwise good novels. And that publishing houses and capitalism as a whole are absolutely destroying creativity in media, because why are all of these writing advise videos from people in the industry so. fucking. formulaic????)
#I also just genuinely hate movies as a storytelling medium tho#so like idk#probably bc of the structure and how short they are#(well I guess there are some good movies but I’m just generally underwhelmed by them)#(I never LOVE movies)#this all so poorly worded bc I’m not knowledgeable about this kind of stuff to really know what I’m talking about#but I’m getting at something ok. maybe.
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Quick question has anyone ever actually known a hot priest/pastor or do they just exist in fiction
#none of the ones i saw growing up were attractive#and personality wise they ranged from decently nice to Creep#so like idk#romy can talk
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what's the gifted kid experience where you used to have something but nobody told you/everyone still acted like you were subpar and now you actually have nothing and you'll never know what could've been if someone had leaned into the fantasy and allowed you to actually pursue some of your interests/talents
#idek#rambles#gifted kid burnout#maybe?#I wasn't a gifted kid and nobody certainly ever believed I was but I *was* capable of doing more than my peers#i learned fast and a lot and i was interested but nobody ever actually put in the effort to let me explore those interests#so like idk#i wouldn't say i was particularly smart but a little appreciation would've been nice
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hmmm. i guess the question is… do i revive my old snap or not… hmm
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let's play a fun game called 'how long can I wear my binder today before sensory issues become unbearable and I take it off' so far it's been 10 mins and I'm already deeply overwhelmed with the feeling of my own breasts being pushed against me. Also neck pain :D
#idk if this is normal or im in medical danger zone like#autism gives me sensory issues#so like idk#yapping#autistic#genderfluid#trans#I once took my binder of in the train toilet cabinet bcs i couldn't bear it anymore#tell me why I'm in sm pain I swear this is my size??#(singing voice) dys phooooria and dys phorrrrrrriaaaa#can't have shit in this world jesus lord
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#not doing good at all but can't express it irl because i don't want to worry anyone. but also i don't want to worry anyone on here as well#so like idk#im so sick of everything rn i just want to sleep but i have stuff to do before i can
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hi guys its me. im feeling,,,kinda terrible rn so here’s some angst i wrote a little while ago!
Something was wrong.
Will knew Mike too well to believe his yeah guys, I’ll be fine! that had sounded far too flat to be reassuring.
He knew Mike had been struggling; it hadn’t been hard to see, not when he was with El, not when Nancy made that offhand comment about his room while they were cleaning Hopper’s cabin.
And yeah, maybe…maybe Mike had changed. Will didn’t doubt that. Change was inevitable, especially with them, between them, and…and that was something that Will had learned to deal with a long, long time ago.
But something about Mike’s volunteering didn’t seem right.
“You weren’t seeing the counselor though, were you, Mike?” Dustin asked, tying a bandana around his head to keep his curls from falling into his face.
Will looked at Mike, expecting a scoff, but he hesitated, hand reaching up to nervously comb through his hair. It had gotten longer in the past couple of weeks - the lack of barbers in Hawkins had ensured that - and was getting curlier, almost. His fingers got caught halfway through. “Well,” he started, then shook his head. “I would never, I’m not—“
“There’s nothing wrong with it, Mike,” Lucas said gently, putting a hand on Mike’s shoulder. “Max was going to her, before—“
“I’m not depressed! I’m fine,” Mike said, too loudly, and Will could feel his eyes widen against his will. Mike took a deep breath before he continued. “I’ll just make him want me, and then when he’s vulnerable, you guys can kill him.”
“We all know how well that worked last time,” Erica pointed out, eyebrows lifted at Mike. Lucas looked down at his hands, and Will ached for him.
He couldn’t imagine losing someone he loved. Holding them in his arms as they pleaded for their life. Watching as the light drained from their eyes.
He wasn’t going to lose anyone else. No one was. Will would make sure of that.
Mike’s lips turned down. “Yeah, well, it’s different this time.” He reached for a bandana, and he wrapped it around his face, covering and protecting his mouth from the spores that still made Will’s lungs ache, all these years later. “We have El, and we have Will.” He brushed his hair back out of his eyes, and Will’s fingers itched to fix it, to put it up, to let his fingertips graze over Mike’s forehead.
“I don’t know what I’m gonna do, Mike,” Will said quietly, fingers twitching slightly at his side.
Mike looked to him, and something shone in his eyes that Will couldn’t place. He put a soft hand on Will’s shoulder. “You’re gonna be there, and you’re gonna make sure that I don’t get taken.”
“Okay,” Will said. His voice sounded small, even to his own ears, but he didn’t care, because Mike was depending on him. They all were.
***
Will didn’t know why they were at the quarry.
He’d just followed Mike—like he always did—and they’d ended up…here.
Mike set his bike down carefully, and Will watched him curiously. Mike shuffled forward, towards the edge, and— “Mike.”
He turned to Will. His thin body was backlit by the unsettling red lighting from the Upside Down, and it made Mike look ill. Will swung a leg over his bike. “Mike.”
“This is where you died, Will,” Mike said quietly, so softly Will had to take a step forward to hear him. “They found your body here, they—“
“But I didn’t die, Mike,” Will interrupted. He could feel his bravery cracking, like the lightning in the sky above them. “I’m here, I’m here.”
“I know,” Mike said, looking away as his voice seemed to shatter. “I know, but god, it looked so real. It was…it was you.”
Will vaguely remembered hearing about it. The government had made an exact replica of…of him, his body, and had left it in the cold water below them. To cover up that he had actually been taken.
“And I couldn’t—“ Mike turned all the way away from Will, curls cascading against his back like a waterfall. “I couldn’t live without you. So I—fuck, One! Come on! Don’t make me say it!”
Mike was yelling now, and it echoed through the eerily desolate landscape around them. Will took a step back, more out of surprise than anything, and he looked around frantically. “Mike—“
“You’ve been in my head, you fucker! You know I jumped because I couldn’t live without him! You know I did! And you know about the letters and the thoughts and the things I can’t bear to say to him! You know everything!” Mike’s screams were hurting Will’s ears, and he covered them with his hands. Will watched in terror as Mike spun to face him, hands on his head, eyes crazed. “Come out and take me! Please! I’m ready to go! Let me out of here!”
“Mike!” Will screamed, pointing behind Mike, and he turned around just in time to see Vecna walking at him, hand raised. Mike fell to the ground, like a puppet with cut strings, and Will tried to run towards him, but he couldn’t move, he couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t—
“Will.”
His voice was everywhere. Will bent over at the waist, mouth open in a silent scream, ears covered with his hands, like his flesh would do anything to stop the terrors of his mind.
“I’ve waited so long for you,” Vecna said, walking past unconscious Mike, whose pale, pale face was twisted into a sick grin, and Will wanted to vomit. “You’ve finally come back to me.”
“No,” Will sobbed, shaking his head. “You’re not real, you’re not real, you’re not—“
“Oh, but I am, Will,” he said, running a finger under Will’s jaw. Suddenly, some vines were snapping out of the underbrush, wet tendrils digging into his skin as they gripped Will’s limbs and lifted him into the air. “I’m more real than anything you’ve ever seen.”
A vine gripped Will’s throat, and he choked out another sob before Vecna was in his face, warm breath puffing over Will’s skin. “You’ve always been lied to, Will.” He pointed at where Mike lay on the ground, limbs askew like he had fallen, or jumped from somewhere very high, oh god— “Maybe it was all your fault, this whole time. For being different.”
He spat the word like venom, and Will recoiled hard enough for the vines holding him in the air to tighten their grip to hold him upright.
“You’re the reason he’s dead,” Vecna hissed, lifting Mike with a hand. “You made him love you, so much that he couldn’t live without you. Does this look like something good to you, Will?”
Mike was thrown at Will’s feet like he weighed nothing, and Will screamed, agony becoming so unbearable that his chest felt like it was collapsing.
“That’s what I thought.” Vecna nodded to himself, then motioned to the apocalyptic hell around him. “If you come with me, we can be good.”
Will shook his head as tears pricked his eyes. The vines around his neck tightened.
“We could be heroes, Will.”
#maybe ill write the rest of this sometime#but im feeling like shit and my writers block is absolutely kicking my ass#actually everything block is kicking my ass#i just sat on my bathroom floor and stared at the wall for a solid#ten minutes#so like idk#pls reblog it would give me seratonin#i would greatly appreciate it#anyways curling up under my weighted blanket rn#byler#byler ficlet#angst#vecna#mike gets vecna'd#will byers has powers
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im so fucking anxious that this guy is gonna abandon me bc he's out of town for the week im gonna throw up and die
#im trying so hard not to overthink but the slightest changes in attitude throw me off and im so afraid hes gonna#realize that he doesnt like me or that im not what he wants#but he also got me a birthday present and met my mom#so like idk#idk and i want to dieeeeeee
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guys should I post my gofundme here
#it’s not for anything like necessity wise so like I feel bad#it’s legit to find a trip I’m taking for like networking opportunities for my internship#so like idk#sam speaks into the mcfuckin void
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for the record my entire family of normal people were super convinced rebecca was gonna leave the club to go live on a boat in amsterdam and i think this is surely a slight improvement to that scenario. though i am still on my 50k childhood friends to enemies to friends to lovers sassyrebecca arc
#idk everyone in the tags up in arms about being Strung Along and Misled perhaaaaaps you were reading into things#told my mom (offline; normal) that people shipped ted and rebecca and she went ‘What? No’#so like idk#ted lasso#tl#c.txt
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